#i wish i could talk to aj about my jj thoughts

[natasha-romanew]

i have too many thoughts. about jemily. and jennifer jareau. and no one to share them with. i’m going insane.

[literateleah]

the paradox of emily prentiss’ audience perception and character design

some of y’all about to be real mad at me, but it must be said:

emily prentiss’ character design makes no sense: my personal opinion + an objective analysis

i think it can be challenging to separate the versions of characters we have in our little brains from actual canon content, but doing so is important for understanding what those characters are truly like, especially within the context of their environment and in contrast to others around them. plus developing a deeper understanding of the media we consume is super fun and interesting! with that being said: emily prentiss should not work for the fbi and here’s why (in three parts regarding who’s responsible: cbs, paget, and fans) (sit down and grab a snack i promise this is over 3k words)

quick disclaimer: i don’t dislike emily at all! that’s my girl, i just looked closer and realized some funky things the writers did and felt the need to analyze her of course: so let’s get into it

part one: what cbs did

cbs set the stage for emily’s introduction on the heels of the departure of lola glaudini as elle greenaway! lola has clarified that she decided to leave the show because filming in los angeles was not the best environment for her personally, and after one successful season on a major network (but not much established long term plot or drama beyond elle’s departure as a character) a consistent ensemble cast was required- particularly because the bau had been criticized for being predominantly male in the first few episodes of the show and not much development was given to penelope or jj yet. enter emily prentiss.

for the duration of seasons 2-3ish, emily was framed as a chip off the block that was elle greenaway, just slightly…richer? in her first few episodes emily was hesitantly polite but ambitious, clean cut, intellectually concise and held her own within the team. she seemed equal parts intimidated and frustrated by her male superiors (gideon, hotch) but certainly proves herself among other profilers. her childhood was explored only within reference to her strained relationship with her mother (which was only ever referenced once more after the fact) and we received a short overview of her educational and career history in her first few episodes. emily fit right into the hole elle had left, and didn’t have many major storylines yet.

seasons 4-6 brought a bit more development and depth to emily’s character! she begins dropping more snarky remarks, one liners, and socially deepening her relationships with the other team members. this seems more within the lines of elle’s design, but emily arguably took more time to grow into her place within the team. during the foyet arc she was vulnerable and supportive, and the doyle arc gave her some independence and agency she didn’t have previously. this era also solidified her appearance and persona as more edgy, which falls in line with general fanon perception of her character (especially when compared to jj or penelope). i can’t address this era or season 7 without mentioning that cbs was actively trying to remove paget from the cast, similar to how they did to aj cook as well. paget has spoken about this instance before, and i believe it slightly affected her portrayal of her character, and “lauren” was somewhat of a goodbye for both paget and emily (thus why she wished for mgg to direct since they were best friends).

season 7: in my opinion, one of the best seasons for emily. she was wisened and deeply wounded by her experiences with doyle, which was understandable of course. she returned to the team she loved and learned to appreciate life in a different way, remaining mature during this time period as well! though her departure was a bit less than graceful and sudden at the end of this season, it made sense compared to some other exits the team had seen.

now *sigh* all the rest.

paget as emily appears in two separate guest appearances (once in s9 and once in s11, and she is referenced offscreen as well) before permanently reprising her role as unit chief of the bau. these appearances were most likely to boost ratings and get the team back together (i.e. 200) or just to pepper in international cases (tribute). emily’s personality remains pretty consistent here, just more mature and comfortable in leadership positions (seeing as she is running an entire branch of an international law enforcement organization). then season 12 hit.

upon the departure of thomas gibson as hotch, cbs reached out to paget to see if she would be interested in fulfilling her role as emily within a longer term unit chief position. i’ll get into why this is wack in a few paragraphs, but the remainder of her time on the show is spent on a mature portrayal that seems very distant from her previous versions. emily is more authoritative, gives orders with ease, and has no qualms about leading a team of agents or even receiving promotion offers as director of the entire bureau.

thus concludes a general summary of the canon content cbs gave us as viewers. now let's talk about what they didn’t give us, regrettably

the primary aspect of emily’s design that comes to mind for many is her queer coding. though not much was to be expected from cbs, a prime time cable tv network, each of her relationships on the show (all with men) seemed oddly forced, and without much chemistry as compared to the SOs of other main characters. rumors of scrapped plotlines have floated around about what may have been, but the ultimate lack of acknowledgement of any queer characters in the main ensemble still leaves a feeling of disappointment to audiences, and leaves more to be desired as for how emily navigates social bonds.

part two (sidebar): what paget did

i think it could be agreed within audiences that paget brewster’s portrayal of emily made the role what it was! her dry witty delivery and emotional prowess combined with sitcom acting experience made her performance a mainstay for years. i think she did the best she could with a confusing and at times flat characterization, and brought the role to life.

paget also heavily contributes to fanon indirectly with her comments outside of the show (press, cameos, twitter etc). her general continued interest and fondness for the role post production affects fan perception, particularly in what she chooses to elevate and comment on. she and aj have both spoken about viewing jemily content, and paget and thomas have both also commented on hotchniss. most cast members feel free to comment on their characters in the appropriate timing, and seem open to discussing fanon ships and theories outside of canon!

part three: what fanon did

as we can tell from this fan space as well as the presence on insta, tik tok and twitter, fans LATCHED onto emily super quickly. she’s remained a favorite over the years, and this fan persistence is what brought her back so many times after leaving (so many times). in my opinion, queer coding and a bolder female trope (in contrast to her female counterparts) are the main pulls because they resonated with so many fans- new and old. with that being said, newer fans of the show in the past year in particular have been heavily influential in fanon, solely because of the large influx of fan content and popularity of it.

fan content began to take coding and bite size moments and snippets from the show as canon, and cemented it into much of the content and discourse they created. these small pieces of emily’s character are significant, but have become magnified by how easily they are to share and edit. for example, a collection of catchy one liners from emily over the seasons makes for a great video edit intro, or gifset! there’s absolutely no problem with this content, it just all combines to create a certain fanon perception no character escapes (this isn’t a phenomenon limited to emily or the cm fandom!)

these droves of content also solidified emily’s personality as much more defined, but at the same time, simplified it in a way that’s slightly harder to explain.

fanon: more emo/goth than canon basis

fanon: more introverted/anti social than canon basis

fanon: more violent/chaotic when canon emily is relatively well mannered and doesn’t start many conflicts (particularly in the workspace)

fanon: much less maternal when canon emily displays desire on multiple occasions (even crossing professional borders) for children, particularly teenage girls (possibly projection)

(again, nothing wrong with this interpretation at all and it still varies! This is just a generalization based on most of the popular content i have seen)

part 4: why it doesn’t work

let me start with this: emily prentiss does not like her job.

we don’t receive much in depth information about emily’s internal feelings and thoughts towards her mother beyond resentment. this stems from wanting to make it on her own, as a professional and as an individual (cough cough college deposits). this makes emily’s insistence on proving herself to authority figures in her earlier seasons is interesting to watch in different circumstances. she cites her experience and denies help from her mother when justifying her placement in the bau to hotch, she is extra vigilant about being helpful on her first case with gideon, etc. nevertheless, emily forges her own path outside of diplomacy and becomes a successful profiler and agent, with the help of her privilege, wealth and name whether she likes it or not. but if we read between the lines and fill in the blanks cbs neglected, these ambitions may subconsciously be oriented towards pleasing her mother.

example one: emily’s authority issues go further than just “rebellion” or “anarchy”, she frequently questions the ethics and sustainability of the work that the bau does. every team member does this, but emily much more so than anybody else.

in “amplification”, emily almost breaks federal protocol to inform civilians of anthrax threats. she butts heads with both hotch and rossi on this front, and ends the episode with having a conversation with rossi about the ethics of lying in their line of work. emily resigns to a solemn “it be like that” and moves along, accepting this reality.

on multiple different occasions emily laments to derek about the darkness she sees on the job, and it’s shown that this gets to her quickly on particularly bad cases. this is another contradiction of the design that she can supposedly “compartmentalize” better than others on the team, when she cannot unless the lives of others are at risk (doyle arc, s7 finale).

emily also responds in this way to many cases involving children, a similarity to jj many don’t notice upon first watching the series. “seven seconds” and “children of the dark” come to mind, during the latter in which emily is prepared to cross multiple professional lines to adopt a teenage girl left orphaned by the case, until hotch stops her and establishes that her emotions can’t rule her judgement on the job. regardless of hotch’s thoughts about her attempted caretaking abilities, these actions and impulses deeply contradict the typical bureaucratic pathways of the work the bau does.

the looming reputation of her mother’s diplomatic history hangs over emily, and after going to law school and working for the cia, she most likely did want to forge her own path as far away from being a socialite: being a spy. her inner nature doesn’t always reflect this profession, and leads me to believe that with her knowledge of psychology, law procedure and care for children: emily prentiss might be more inclined to working in social work, placing suffering children and teenagers in homes they deserve.

and finally, the hill i will die on: emily prentiss was an bad unit chief

this wonderful post touches on my general sentiment, but there were many reasons as to why emily prentiss’ career arc makes little to no sense (plot holes included).

first: her background. emily attended chesapeake bay university as well as yale and achieved a ba in criminal justice. keep in mind that though timelines evidently don’t exist in the cm universe, emily prentiss is ONE YEAR older than aaron hotchner (for context). in her first episode, she professes that she has worked for the bureau for a little under ten years in midwestern offices- something the audience laters knows to not be true. emily worked with the cia and interpol as a part of a profiling team and undercover agent up until roughly TWO YEARS before her canon introduction. plot holes and time gaps aside, this makes me wonder, why didn’t she just say the cia was a backstop without revealing the highly confidential nature of her work with doyle (similar to jj’s state department backstop and cover story)? penelope or hotch could have easily accessed her file and seen that she did not in fact have experience with the bureau in midwestern offices recently, and given the fact that erin strauss set up her bau placement, i’m presuming these formalities or references were overlooked.

second: her experience within the team. emily worked as a part of the bau with the bureau for roughly 6 or 7 years. after this, she is invited to run the entire london branch of interpol, one of the most renowned international law enforcement organizations. i’m surely not the most knowledgeable on requirements or standard timelines for such matters, but with the fact that emily had never led a team in her life (not in the bau or interpol previously) and had roughly 10 years of field experience, i don’t believe she would have ever realistically been considered eligible to run the whole london department.

third: her return to the bureau. fanon depiction of their relationship aside, if you believe aaron hotchner’s last wish before going into witsec was to entrust his team to emily prentiss, you’re dead mistaken. bringing emily back was clearly a pull for ratings after the loss of two main characters (hotch and derek), but logistically a bad decision. let’s suppose emily has had 4 or 5 years of experience in london now, this established authority position would be unlikely to change at the drop of a hat, even for old teammates or friends. also considering how close they were after a decade of working closely in bureaucratic and field contexts, i firmly believe hotch would have referred jj for the job of unit chief but that’s another discussion for another time.

emily’s reign as unit chief is odd, because of the many chaotic storylines crammed into it. but amidst bad writing and viewings plummeting, emily’s character is completely flattened. completely. emily is unrecognizable, both in appearance (that god awful wig) and personality. at times she acts as a complete wise authority, giving orders and delegating local authorities as hotch did. but at other times she makes multiple illegal, emotional, and incorrect judgement calls based on personal circumstances that lead to further chaos (deleting the recording of her and reid’s mexico conversation and reprimanding luke in “luke” for the exact same thing she did in season 6 even though she enabled her to do so come to mind).

i’m not sure if this is due to paget trying to find her footing in the role again, or the writer’s bad decisions towards the end of the show wrecking any previous design for their ensemble. then, there’s the infamous “wheels up” scene in s13e1. notoriously cringey, this seems like a vague caricature of something rossi would say many years in the past (the same goes for her pep talk in “red light” in the hunt for diana reid). these moments are meant to mature emily in the audience’s eye, but instead completely removed her from who we understood her to be, and made her an unreliable leader.

part five: and why it does

in theory, emily was a bolder foil to jj, similar to elle who she arguably replaced at first. she came into her own, and stands as a more uniquely developed character than almost any other in the main ensemble. she isn’t as maternal or domestically inspiring as canon jj, less bright and sunny than penelope, not quite as stoic or intimidating as derek or hotch. And yet at the same time, she’s a fairly blank slate. stripping fanon content away entirely, canon emily has few defining traits (all of which are constantly changing), and that may be the key to why we love her so much.

[imagining-in-the-margins]

Hi! You often give alot of insight into anons like this and your my fave CM blog so that's why I'm here! So I'm finishing up the last seasons (and lord it is hard to get through) and they just introduced Max and I cannot stand her. She was just so rude and it felt like she had 2 different personalities the entire time she was on screen. And I worried that this meant I was like hating women because I don't like other female characters like Maeve, JJ, Hailey, and Seaver. But then I started thinking and I honestly think it's cause these Characters are women poorly written by men. But then I wondered how they created likeable Characters like Emily, Kristy, Blake, Tara, and Penelope (leaving out others like Savannah because they're under developed in my opinion) I don't know what's the difference in the writing for these Characters or of there isn't any at all and I'm just being hateful in a way. What are your thoughts?

Ah, I think about this a lot. Thank you for thinking I’m interesting enough to answer this, also!

I think you’ve really hit the nail on the head with the writers doing a poor job at most of their female characters. However, I think it’s possible (and very common in this fandom) for people to dislike any character Spencer showed an interest in, which is also problematic and rooted in internalized misogyny. To me, it all comes down to why you dislike the characters.

(A LOT More Below - Bit of a Rant)

The first step I took when reflecting to see if this was my problem was rewatching and seeing which female characters I loved. Along with the ones you listed, I also found a number of side characters I greatly enjoyed, including Lila, Austin, Dr. Linda Kamura (from Amplification, the anthrax episode), Einstein, Megan Kane, and a few other random case characters. So, right off the bat I found multiple characters who Spencer showed an affinity for. I also greatly enjoyed Cat’s character, although I found her to be underdeveloped in canon (Fanon has done a good job, IMO) and often contradictory in her character design.

If you didn’t like any of these women, and your reason is related purely to Spencer’s reactions to them, chances are you might be suffering from a bit of jealousy rather than improper character design - not that you need to like them all (or the ones that I like), but because they are all very different. You should, theoretically, find something to enjoy about at least one of them.

But the CM Writers have a TERRIBLE habit of writing women that are easy to hate.

There’s a bunch of controversy I see over Haley Hotchner, but the truth is that they wrote her to be hated. That was her sole purpose. Her character’s decisions were poorly thought out and she was shown to be malicious 80% of the time. This was intentional. She was written to personify the trope of the nagging housewife. If you dislike her, you have done nothing but follow the narrative.

That being said, you should also criticize why they wrote her this way. Because it didn’t make any sense. She married a prosecutor - a dangerous, time consuming job. She had Jack when she knew he was with the BAU. Why did she randomly change her tune? Why did she suddenly demand he gives up on his dreams that she was fully aware of for years? I’d argue they wrote it like this to further the narrative of “the wife who traps you with a child to force you to do what she wants” which is garbage writing. I wish people could look at the potential she had if they hadn’t written her like... that.

Maeve, I find, is problematic on multiple aspects and I’ve talked about it before. Her narrative was poorly thought out because as soon as they pitched the idea of a long-term love interest for Spencer, everyone (most notably Gubler) rejected it. They didn’t think it was necessary for his character, who already had a lot going on with the ignored plot lines of his drug addiction and mother.

There were multiple problems associated with her character that were never addressed. The fact she essentially just took advantage of a patient because she was bored, she seemed to “correct” his interests and show annoyance when he disagreed with her, she lied about having a fiance, she was shown to be considering breaking up with him... there’s a lot.

Her character is poorly written. It had a lot of potential, but they just kind of stopped caring once they decided to kill her off. She had more faults shown on screen than redeeming qualities. For many, they liked her because they see there was a potential that we’ll never see (fair). But for people like me, we interpret it as a idealized fantasy of what could have (but probably wouldn’t have) been, which is not healthy for Spencer.

JJ is an interesting character because you can feel the constant struggle between AJ Cook and the writers. They really sabotaged JJ at every step of the way. I’ll be honest and say that I think there are some reasons to hate JJ, but they aren’t the reasons I see most often. Almost all of the JJ hate I see is surrounding the idea that JJ is an evil, manipulative, jealous bitch. But.. she’s not. Even in Truth or Dare, when she pulls that asshole move that was wildly OOC for JJ (in my opinion), she isn’t shown to be jealous or cruel about it.

I think she’s the most likely target for people who’s hatred is driven from jealousy or disliking conventionally attractive women and assuming them to be bitchy by nature of looking “beautiful.” I think Lila Archer* also falls into this category.

But as I said, JJ was also written with a lot of flaws. I think it’s fair if you don’t like her character or the way she treats Spencer, but I also hope that you similarly criticize the whole team in the same way, and don’t just pity Spencer because he is smol uwu babie who needs protection.

(* Yet another reminder that I ask everyone to not message me about J Depp or Amber Heard. Reactive Abuse is an extreme trigger for me and I will block you if you try to get me to talk about it)

Seaver got a lot of hate based off one line of dialogue. I think it was a bad line. If they had left it out, there would be essentially no reason in my mind to dislike Seaver. I used to dislike her a lot, but the more I rewatch the show, the less she bothers me. She was just a young student who wanted to learn about her father/herself. She was MASSIVELY underdeveloped because they kicked her off just as quickly as they invited her in.

NO character was developed that quickly. Her scenes were a bit cringey and the plotlines were bad, and her character was mediocre. I don’t think she deserves the hate she gets. She is a lukewarm character.

I hate everything Max’s character represents. She was introduced to show that Spencer could be trained to be “normal” and it’s anti-autistic bullshit. She had no personality besides “I hate my low-brow job as a teacher and couldn’t be fucked to change it until a man told me I was smart.” She was cracking high-school-clique jokes while her family was about to be murdered. She immediately abandoned said family to make out with her boyfriend who just admitted to enjoying kissing the woman who tried to murder her family.

Her character makes absolutely zero sense. I do not understand how she is so liked. I really don’t (other than the fact that RLC is absolutely wonderful).

If they had left her character out, I think we would have been better off for it. We could have seen Spencer wrestle with defining himself by the women in his life and learning to love himself (without just replacing those women with... another... woman...)

That being said, those who cling to Max for hope of a happy ending for Spencer... I felt that. Fanon and fanfic can solve all character deficiencies. I believe in you.

So, yeah. I’d say if you’re worried about why you dislike women characters, you’re probably on the right path. I’d just reflect on why you dislike the characters you do and whether they are written as misogynistic stereotypes. It makes complete sense to reject characters written for the purpose of making you hate them, but we should all pour one out for the brilliant actresses that had characters with so much potential if not for men ruining it.

[1-800-imagines]

My Brother’s Best Friend (John B Series)

Author’s Note: This is the start of my new series! It features AJ Maybank, JJ’s twin sister. It is also on my Wattpad, here!

I tied it in with this request, hope you enjoy: hey love not sure if reqs are open or non but I love love your imagines and am dyinggggg for some more john b lol, maybe one where you’re jj’s sister and are sneaking around with jb but he finds out?

Being JJ’s twin meant it was hard to get John B alone since the two of them were best friends. You had gotten pretty good at it as of lately. JJ would pass out at the Chateau and you would text him that you were ‘sleeping at one of your friend's houses’. Then you and John B would just spend the night in the van.

You slept at the Chateau a lot also but you knew it was WAY too risky to mess around while JJ was there. It would have also been disrespectful to your brother and you didn't want to do that. You honestly felt bad for seeing John B, but you had tried and tried again to avoid your feelings for the boy, yet they always came back in full swing. You also didn’t have that many friends to cover your ass about who’s house you were sleeping at. That’s how you blew your cover. You were supposed to be sleeping at Kie’s that night.

The two of you thought you had it planned perfectly planned that morning. It was supposed to be like every other morning had been. You were in John B’s arms, waking up slowly. “G’mornin,” John B said stretching out his arms out, but pulling you right back to him after a second. It was not ideal spending the night in a goddamn van, but John B was worth it. This was not just a hookup situation. The two of you were in a weird spot with 'defining the relationship' because of your brother, but you both knew you had feelings.

Everyone thought John B had a new girlfriend due to the pillows and blankets in the van but no one put two and two together. “Hi,” You smiled and reached for your phone making sure your dad hadn’t texted you needing something. Instead, it was JJ who had texted you. All it said was, ‘where are you?’

Your eyebrows furrowed together. JJ never asked where you were. It was always the other way around. “What’s wrong?” John B asked, picking his head up to look at you. His voice was full of concern. He knew it could have been your dad or something and you honestly wished it was.

“JJ asked where I am.” You shrugged, trying not to let your anxiety boil over. If you acted like it was nothing, maybe it would be. ‘At Kie’s. I’ll be at John B’s soon.’  You responded and looked at John B frowning. Your heart started to race and your stomach was coiled, you had a bad feeling. He was also rarely up this early.

“I’ll say I saw you on my way back from the Cameron’s and gave you a ride. It’ll be okay.” John B kissed you and you nodded. You had to admit, it was kinda stupid saying you were at Kie’s without telling her but you really didn’t think anything of it. Your whole sneaking around with John B shenanigans and sleeping in the van had started 2 weeks ago. You had been hanging out together longer.

You packed up your blanket and stashed your stuff into your bag and then the two of you drove towards the Chateau. The two of you walked inside, talking about random stuff trying to make everything seem normal. When you got inside you saw everybody. You were caught.

Kie, Pope, and JJ were all sitting around waiting for you. “So you were at Kie’s, huh?” JJ said, getting right to it as soon as you walked in. He was pissed, he stood up to get right in your face. “Except Kie said you haven’t been sleeping there in weeks. What if I ask your other friends? Huh? What the fuck is going on, AJ?” You knew he felt betrayed and then he turned to John B, “And you? I trusted you. I’ve been staying here and you’ve been sneaking around with my sister under my nose.”

“JJ, nothing ever happened around you. I’ve liked AJ since we were younger...” John B started to say and he was trying to get between you and JJ.

“Don’t come home.” He said looking at you, tears in his eyes, “I don’t wanna see you right now. I can’t believe you with MY best friend.” JJ said, storming out. You had dealt with your brother's anger before, but nothing like this.

“Thanks for lying to me, AJ. And now look how much you’ve hurt your brother.” Kie said rolling her eyes and huffing out. You just stood there in shock. Pope looked at the two of you with sympathy and followed the other two out the door. Once everyone left, you erupted into a sob and fell on the floor.

John B caught you and brought you down softly. “Hey hey, it’s okay. It’s okay. He’s just mad.” He said, holding you close, “He’ll get over it. You know how he is.” You did know how he was, he was your twin, but also one of your best friends which is why it stung so much.

“I hurt him. I did this. It’s my fault.” You sobbed. You couldn’t help it. JJ was choosing to go stay with your abusive father rather than be around you. He hadn't been home in a long time.

“No, it’s mine. He told me to back off forever ago and I chose to go forward with my feelings. He’s overreacting. I’ll fix it. Okay? But for now, let’s let him be.” John B said and held you close rocking you. Your world was falling apart, but it wouldn't be just your world falling apart soon.

Tags:

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Tags and Requests always open!

[abortionado]

i need to state an unpopular opinion and i feel like you are one of the few that wont stone me for it (maybe): i dont like jj that much 😳 i mean she was lowk toxic at times and when spencer was going through his thing she did not care but when spence was like im here for u she was like i was tortured stop asking if im okay u dont know me 😡 like... u realize he... the whole dilaudid....... like it was unfair how she treated him sometimes love aj sm but ... (im sorry this was so long omg)

Thank you for this because this is an interesting discussion to have!!

I didn’t like JJ at first because I thought she was super bland, but she’s grown on me over time, because I’ve sort of realized why her presence is so important to the team: she’s an everyman, and we’re supposed to see ourselves in her.

I love all of the other characters, of course, but they’re a little “out there”, if that makes sense, and I don’t think they’re very easy for common audiences to relate to.

Hotch is a hardass, 100% stoic, nearly fearless leader who is kind when he needs to be and always closes the BAU’s cases, usually flawlessly. We all want a leader like this in our lives—who cares very much for us (but not enough that it clouds his judgement), who will graciously take a band of misfits under his wing and treat them as his own, who almost always makes the right calls and almost always gets the job done—but do we know leaders like this? Could any of us ever truly be a leader like this?

Morgan is an absolutely perfect picture of classically noble masculinity—he’s intelligent, loyal, good-hearted, protective of his loved ones, and, obviously, very physically attractive. We can and do love him endlessly, but he’s too good to be true. How many men have you met that are as brave and selfless as Derek? Could you ever look at a situation where you understand that you’re likely to burn to death alone among the wreckage of an ambulance and decide to take that chance in order to save a handful of strangers? Maybe you have, and maybe you could, but I haven’t and couldn’t.

Reid (before season 13 because idc about any of that) is a classic golden child. He’s the team’s little darling (and, in some cases, the viewers’ little darling). He’s soft-spoken, ingenius, introspective, non-confrontational, and, in situations where he’s involved in a conflict, he always acts with both heart and head and always takes the moral high ground, even if it’s not the best decision. He cares deeply about his friends. We as viewers tend to feel very, very sorry for him (or at least, we’re supposed to). When he argues with someone else, he’s usually in the right, and I find myself taking his side. Spencer is a fantastic character, and most of us (I don’t know if this is you) adore him, but there’s almost no one in real life who manages to be so consistently calm, mild-mannered, and thoughtful, not to mention the fact that his superficial intellect is purposely dramatically exaggerated. (There are only so many geniuses in real life.)

Garcia is. Garcia, so I don’t think I really have to get into this one, but people (especially people who have every reason in the world to be cynical) so unwaveringly optimistic and loving are uncommon.

Prentiss is a texbook chaotic good. She doesn’t always make the right choices, but she usually does, and she’s always driven by her strong moral compass. There are very few real-life people so willing to disobey orders and risk losing everything for the sake of doing what they believe is right. From the time she was introduced, we’ve been made to understand that if Emily sets her mind to something—if she truly believes she deserves something, if she is truly devoted to someone, if she truly believes that morality directs her one particular way—she will not rest until her goal is met. She is determined to a degree that most of us can only aspire to. She fears no man, god, or unit chief. Don’t all of us wish we could be that way? Unafraid, always able to do what’s right even if the world is telling us no?

Rossi is wise, classy, and just mysterious enough that he’s like glamorous character from a mystery novel. He always knows what his team needs to hear. He knows everything about his field. He knows exactly when someone needs a reassuring word or backup or a…family spaghetti night. I don’t think I have to elaborate too much on Rossi, either, but I think that we all wish we had someone like Rossi in our lives who always knew what we needed and could always give it to us.

I’m not saying this is BAD. It’s the opposite, actually, because romanticizing the human condition is a necessary element of drama. Criminal Minds is a drama, and when someone writes a drama, they need you to deeply love the characters so that you’ll worry about them and cry for them when they’re hurting. Can you imagine if these characters were as moody, snippy, and occasionally selfish as all of us are in real life? It wouldn’t be enjoyable at all! I would be so pissed off the whole time I watched lmao

But, at the same time, we as viewers do need someone who we can really, truly relate to, and THAT is why I love JJ, and why I think she’s such an important member of the team.

JJ has a family, and that is what’s most important to her. She’s a mother before anything. Everyone has a mother, and some viewers are mothers, so this is something the vast majority of us can relate to. She loves Spencer, but she snaps at him or doesn’t have the patience to deal with him sometimes. Don’t we all do that to the ones we love occasionally?

JJ is “bland,” meaning she doesn’t have one big, bold, defining personality trait that we can smack down on her (like the others—“brave,” “smart,” “chaotic”) because she’s supposed to reflect us. JJ is supposed to help us relate to these wacky, melodramatic characters in a more human way. She interacts with the rest of the team in a way writers imagine we as viewers can relate to— she’s a little intimidated by Hotchner, but grows closer with him as the years go on. She babies Spencer, but gets frustrated with him when he talks too much or is incapable of reading the room. She finds Penelope strange, and adores her for that. She wants Emily Prentiss to top her. She’s overwhelmed following a traumatic incident in a way that none of the other characters ever really have been.

Does that make sense? JJ is y/n, is what I’m saying. This is just my opinions so if you think differently that’s totally fine, but I just thought I’d write a dissertation on your anon ask haha

[saharamae21]

Unrequited Love (Topper Fanfic - Prologue)

Hey guys! Bonus post today! I’m starting a fanfic with @outerbongs!!! Here’s the Prologue to Unrequited Love! I’m writing from the POV of Aspen and she’s writing the POV of Topper! You can check out the prologue she write here! Let me know what you think of it!

Authors: sguymon21 and outerbongs

Summary: Aspen Maybank has always followed in her older brother's footsteps, and listened to what he said. She is nothing like him though. Aspen has never been involved in the rivalry between the Kooks, but has learnt to hate them. All of them except Topper Thornton. Her and Topper meet properly at Midsummer's, and after she spills her feelings to him on a bench outside the event, she feels something. Does he feel the same?

Warnings: None

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Prologue

Aspen’s POV

Growing up in the Maybank household was never a walk in the park. Still JJ and I tried to make the best of it. We stuck up for each other and we protected each other. When things got too out of hand, we left. John B always let us crash at his place, no matter what. It was nice to have a second brother in him. The rest of the Pogues were like family as well. Kiara was basically my sister and Pope was another brother. I didn’t know what I would do without them.

However, as the treasure hunt began, I also felt like something started to end. I’ve always felt as if I didn’t quite belong with JJ’s friends. They alway seemed to be closer with the inner four than with me. I had never vocalized my fears to the group, but I always felt them deep down. Maybe that’s why when I first spoke to him, my world changed.

John B had been gone all day and had completely missed the shitshow that unraveled before us. JJ was arrested. Pope was freaking out. Kie was getting ready for Midsummers. That left me. As soon as dad picked up JJ, I knew there was no stopping what was going to come. I couldn’t protect him. Instead of going home, I went with Kiara. I helped her get ready and eyed all the beautiful dresses she had. I wished I was going.

“Pick one out,” she said. Kie and I were roughly the same size, but still I couldn’t pick out a dress. Where would someone like me wear a dress like that? “C’mon. I’m not kidding! You can be my plus one tonight.”

“For real?” I asked. She nodded and told me it would be more fun with a friendly face there. I smiled and hugged her. Excitement ran through my veins as she helped me pick out something that would look nice on me. I slipped into the dress and Kiara helped me with my hair and makeup. It was perfect. I still looked like me, but better. I couldn’t believe what I saw.

“You look great, AJ,” Kiara said to me. I couldn’t even respond, I just stared. Then her mom called up for us to hurry and we made our way down. Mr. and Mrs. Carrera liked me. They treated me like a daughter and didn’t oppose me enjoying the kook life a little bit.

When we got to Midsummers, everyone’s eyes were on me. I could tell that they were wondering what a Maybank was doing here. I didn’t mind though. I was dressed up and excited for a night of luxury. We walked over to get a drink and Pope was there, Kie put on her best rich kid voice and he laughed. He didn’t notice me at first. I felt small.

I told them I was going to go look around and excused myself. I had never been to something like this, so I must’ve looked pretty bright eyed. I wandered around and bumped straight into a chest. I apologized profusely and then looked up.

“It’s okay,” Topper said with a small smile. He looked stressed out. I gave a kind smile back and then looked around, expecting Sarah to pop out of nowhere. She wasn’t anywhere in sight though. I shifted my attention back to him. His stress began to make sense.

“Are you okay?” I asked. He chuckled at me. He told me he was fine and then in the moment, something caught my eye. Sarah Cameron and someone else standing out on the gazebo. I didn’t want to hurt him, but I also didn’t want him to not know what was going on. I motioned behind him. “If you’re looking for Sarah, I think you just found her.”

He glanced over his shoulder and I saw his face contort into this look of hurt and jealousy. Two feelings that I knew all too well. He turned around to get a better look and I took that as my queue to leave. I had taken two steps when he called my name.

“Aspen,” he said. I glanced over my shoulder. No one called me Aspen. I hated it ever since my mom left. Ever since then I had been AJ, short for Aspen Jane. However, as soon as my name left his lips, my heart fluttered. “Thanks.”

I nodded and walked around the corner. I stopped and leaned up against the wall, trying to settle my heart down for a moment. I knew I should find Kiara again, but I had to settle down first. I took a deep breath and made my way back to the main area. When I got there JJ was yelling something. I didn’t even know JJ was here. I heard Kie’s voice yell something and tried to make my way over to her, but then I stopped in my tracks. I watched as the Pogues ran off. They were laughing and cheering. They made their way to the docks, not even realizing that they left me there.

I didn’t want to stick around after that. I made my way to the front of the building and sat outside on a bench. My wonderful night out had turned sour and I couldn’t believe my friends. I was about to start walking when I felt someone sit down beside me.

“Why didn’t you go with your friends?” Topper asked me.

I stared at him. He looked sad as if he needed the company as much as I did right now. Something about him told me that I could trust him. I found myself spilling my guts about how I never felt like I really belonged with them. I told him how they were always going to be closer to each other than to me, even if one of them was my brother. We talked for almost an hour, just him and I. I couldn’t help opening up to him. It all just seemed so natural.

“Do you want a ride home?” he asked me. I wanted to spend more time with him, but I would settle for a ride home. I didn’t really want to see the others tonight so I told him to bring me back to the Maybank household. If I was lucky, my dad would be passed out already and I could slip in undetected.

“Turn here,” I said pointing at the driveway. He pulled up to the house and I looked at him again. He smiled at me and it sent my heart soaring into the clouds. “Thank you.”

“Anytime, Aspen,” he said. He had no idea what he was doing to me. It had to be bad for my health. I bit my lip as I smiled and got out of the car. I walked into my house and snuck into my room, collapsing onto my bed. Thoughts of him consumed me, even though I knew they shouldn’t. This was the start of the inevitable. I was falling for Topper Thornton.

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[sleepream]

Criminal Minds 14x15 Thoughts

Okay, I kinda “left” the CM fandom for a while because I felt like I wasn’t happy with the last seasons. I’ve watched some episodes to just be informed or something. And of course after the season finale premiere I knew that “omg jeid is canon!! how dare they do that??77”. People were really shocked so yeah I knew the main spoiler before watching and this is why I decided to watch that episode by myself.

I thought it will disappoint me, but actually I really liked the episode!

There was a huge reference to the good old “L.D.S.K” and I freaking happy with it! This is one of my favorite episodes. And it’s nice to see how Reid improved his shooting skill.

Talking about the “X-moment”: it was really good. In my opinion, of course.

I didn’t ship Jeid so hard, but this moment seemed to me kinda I dunno cute?? It actually makes sense. Reid is absolutely in love with JJ, it seems clearly to me. Just look at him! His eyes are full of hope.

Does she feel the same way? I dunno. That’s the case, it’s cliffhanger, nobody knows. But I can assume that she does. It’s hard to define how I understand their relationship, it’s not like usual physical love, it’s something different. But it’s not like brother and sisters relationship too.

I like Emily’s speech:

“Dave and Krystall are twin flames, two souls that are always meant to be together. Sometimes it takes time, sometimes it takes a parallel universe or something, but the thing about twin flames is that nothing can keep them apart. They are a magic unto themselves. And together, they light the way for all of us.”

And I’m sure that it’s all about JJ and Reid. And I think that this is the case when it takes a parallel universe.

Reid and JJ could be together. I really wish they could. They are a great couple. But not in this universe. CM writers are not going to ruin JJ’s family, I think. I wish they made Jeid come true, but I don’t think it’s going to happen. (But to be honest I still hope so).

I don’t want Reid to be alone again. But also I think that it’s impossible to add a new female character for him, they don’t have enough time for it. So as for me JJ is a perfect choice. Just because she’s married, doesn’t mean she can’t love Reid. (I just want a happy ending for our pretty boy, he deserves one!)

So. I think that they love each other, but Jeid is not going to happen. But I still hope so.

Otherwise, all this story twist looks useless. I hope AJ and Matthew decided to do this for some reason. (And considering that they wanted their characters be together, I hope it will be good for the Jeid shippers🤞).

Aaaaand that’s my opinion, I don’t force anyone to think the same way, so don’t judge me.

[reject-princess97]

Spencer Reid-Criminal Minds (Part 7)

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7

*Three Months Later*

"Someday I'll wish upon a star

And wake up where the clouds are far behind me

Where troubles melt like lemon drops

Oh, way above the chimney tops,

that's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow

Skies are blue..." I sang softly as I rocked my son gently as he cried for his dad, who was away, working on a case, but would be back pretty soon.

"And the dreams that you dare to dream

Really do come true" He crying Quietened down slowly as I sang.

"If happy little bluebirds fly above the rainbow," I watched as AJ's eyes fluttered closed and my voice became softer as I lay him down his his crib.

"Why, Oh, why can't I? " I finished as I switched off the light and left the room hoping he would finally sleep.

I manged to clean up a little and finally sit down when I felt my phone buzz. I pulled if out to find Spencer was calling. I pulled the phone to my ear and smiled when I heard his voice.

"Y/N, hey, hows everything going? Hows Alex?" He asked immediately.

"We're both doing fine Spence, Alex's medication did his job and he's back to our normal smiley, happy baby boy." I told him. "Except when he 's missing you of course." I chuckle.

"I miss him too, both of you but t's OK, because I'm on my way home and I have the whole weekend off." He told me and I could hear the excitement in hi voice . "I'll be home in half and hour." He told me.

"Well, I'll try and wait up but if I'm asleep when you get home, don't be surprised." I laughed. Spencer chuckled and we said our good byes.

I lay my head on the couch and sighed as I let Doctor Who play on the TV while I snuggled one of Spencer's shirts. Something I did a lot when Spencer was away was wear one of his shirts and a pair of my PJ shorts, His shirts smelt just like him and it always calmed me and it seemed to relax AJ too.

*About 2 am*

I was woken by the sound of AJ crying, but i soon stopped and from the baby monitor, I heard Spencer talking to our son. I sat up and looked around to see I was somehow in my bed, my socks had been taken off and my duvet was wrapped around me.

I jumped when I heard my name from the baby monitor.

"Y/N, I know you're awake, so go back to sleep, I'll deal with Alex tonight." Spencer said, knowing full well I was up. I laughed and pulled my phone out and sent a quick 'I love you xx' text to Spencer before I fell back to my pillow, quickly falling asleep.  

*The Next Morning*

I woke up the next morning, snuggled into my boyfriends arms, My head resting on his chest. I smiled as I looked up to see Spencer passed out, his hair falling over his face a little, His mouth opened slightly and as I moved his arms tightened around me.

I lay there happily until I heard the quiet sounds of AJ's Coos, meaning he was awake. I very carefully, without waking Spencer up, stood from the bed and walked into the next room where I found my son, laying awake, 'talking' to his mobile that hung from above the crib, that was filled with bright coloured fish, a gift from Henry and Michael, JJ's Boys.

Well, good morning my beautiful boy, how are you this morning?" I asked as I lifted his from his crib and held him close. When he heard my voice he smiled and as I lift him up he let out a loud screech of excitement.

"Well, hello to you too." I laugh as I grabbed his favourite teddy, a small blue bare Jack had brought him when he visited with Hotch, I also grabbed his blanket that Spencer's mum had made him. It was grey with is name stitched in, well 'Alexander-James' as his full name was too long.

After grabbing his things I carried AJ  into Mine and Spencer's room where I lay him in between Spencer and I. I grabbed 'Peter Pan', something I was currently reading to Him. As I read AJ cooed and I felt the bed shift. As AJ let out a loud squeal I looked over to see Spencer was awake and was listening to me read to our son while he played.

"Hey!" He protested with a smiled as I stopped reading. "I was enjoying that." he sulked, making me laughed, coursing AJ to let out giggle too.

"Well, good morning to you too, Dr. Reid." I Chuckled as Spencer Carefully sat up in the bed and picked AJ up.

"Good morning babe." He grinned as he lent over and kissed me softly.

Spencer pulled away with a groan as his phone rang. He reached for it but I  dived over his legs and grabbed it. I smiled when I saw the caller ID read 'JJ'.

"This is Dr Y/N Prentiss, you've reached Dr Spencer Reid's phone, How can I help you?" I chattered into the phone. I heard JJ laugh.

"Good morning Dr Prentiss, is Dr Reid there?" She asked.

"He's with a patient at the moment. Is there something I can help you with?" I joked. I could feel her head shaking her head at my silliness as she chuckled.

"Well, I just called to see if him and his girlfriend were free to join me and the boys for coffee?" She asked.

"I'll see if I can reach him, hold please..." I said as I pulled the phone away from my ear. "JJ wants to meet for coffee...are we free?" I asked Spencer who laughed and nodded.

"Miss JJ, he and his wonderful, amazing, bad-ass girlfriend are in fact free to join you in an hour from now, is that OK by you?" I asked her. JJ answered yes and said she'll text Reid the details before we said our goodbyes and hung up the phone.

"You're and Idiot." Spencer chuckled as I climbed off his legs and pulled our son from is arms.

"Aww, I love you too Spencer," I smiled as he stoop up and walked off towards the bathroom.

"Well little man, we're going to see Aunt JJ, so let's get you dressed." I cooed as I picked AJ up and took him into his bedroom. I placed him on his bed. I waved over to his draws and pulled out a vest, a white shirt, a pair of black jeans and a pair of converse, baby size of course.

I changed him into his outfit, adding a bib, white with a picture a black bow tie and a black cardigan.

"There you go, all dressed and looking handsome." I gushed as I picked him up and carried him back to Spence and I's room. Spencer walked out of the bathroom and over to his closet and changed into a black shirt, black trousers and a black tie.

"Wow." I smiled as I pulled Spencer's shirt that I slept in, over my head. "You look like you're going to a funeral." I shook my head.

"Maybe I am." He told me as he pulled on a pair of sun glasses, obviously quoting my favourite movie, Walk The Line.

"Yeah OK Johnny Cash, how about you go make some bottles for your son?" I instructed as he laughed. He chuckled nodding as he walked over and kissed me before he picked up our son and walked out, leaving me to change.

I pulled on a dark green shirt, a pair of black skinny jeans. I added my favourite pair of converse. I let my hair fall into it's usual do before I grabbed  my phone and AJ's changing bag before I walked out to see Spencer strapping AJ into his stroller.

"I thought we'd walk, the cafe is only a few blocks down and JJ is walking too." Spence smiled when he noticed I was stood behind him. "Here," He smiled as he took the changing bag and handed me my coat.

After checking we had everything we left the house and began our walk to the cafe JJ had picked.

"Spence?" I said, breaking our comfortable silence as we crossed over a road.

"Mmm?" he hummed as turn his head to look at me.

"Am I doing the right thing, coming back to work I mean?" I asked.

"How do you mean?" He asked, place his hand over my back.

"Well, I love working for the BAU, you know that, but I'm not sure I'm ready to go back, to leave AJ." I told him, feeling conflicted. This was something I had been fighting with for a while and with it being so close, my first day back at work, I need help.

"Well, I do see were you're coming from, but I can't really help you. I mean  love Alexander, you know that, but the BAU is my job and it's what I'm ment to do." He told me. "But if you're not ready to come back, talk to Hotch, I;m sure he will understand." Spencer reassured me.

"Maybe, I'm just being silly." I sighed.

"Maybe you could talk to JJ about it, she's had two boys so she's done it twice. Maybe she can help ease your mind." Spencer offered. By the time our conversation had ended we were at the cafe and as we entered Spencer was immediately tackled by Henry who ran at him for a hug.

"Uncle Spencer!" He shouted. Spencer laughed and pulled I'm into a hug as I pushed the pram over to the table JJ and Michael were sat at.

"JJ, Hi." I smiled as she stood up and hugged me.

"Y/n, how are you?" She asked as she poked her head into the stroller to see AJ.

"We're both find, we missed Spencer a lot this week and AJ has been a little ill but he's fine. Nothing to worry about." I told her as I pulled AJ out the Stroller and handed him to JJ "You wanna cuddle?" I asked as she took him and smiled.

"You know I do."

Spencer ordered some food for us all, including Will who was on his way and soon we were all enjoying coffee and food, having a right laugh as we did.

"Hey, JJ, how was it going back to work after the were born?" I asked, she looked over and smiled softly.

"Well, I won't lie to you, it was hard, especially the child abduction cases. But it got better, knowing they were safe with Will or the Nanny." She told me, "You worried about coming back to work?" she asked.

"A little, just don't feel right about leaving him so soon." I shrugged.

"Well, to be honest, it will be hard at first, but it will get better and when the next one comes along it won't be any easier." She chuckled.

By now we had finished our coffee and the boys were bugging Will to take them to the park.

JJ asked if we wanted to tag along but I decided wanting to go home and spend some time with both Spencer and our son.

"So..." Spencer spoke up as we entered the house. AJ sound asleep. "Did JJ help any?"

"Yeah, she did. I mean, I love Alex, but the BAU is my family too and they need both the geek squad to keep them from sinking in cases." I told him, making his laugh. I took AJ out of his stroller and put him in his bed.

"Good, because I really miss you at work." he whispered, placing a soft kiss on my forehead.

"Now AJ is asleep, I think we should take advantage of the quite." Spencer whispered seductively. I smirked and pulled him by his tie to our bedroom.

"Most definitely." I winked before closing our bedroom door for some well deserved and needed alone time with my boyfriend.

[hotchnerfuckmeup]

Gone Pt. 5

Part One  Part Two  Part Three  Part Four

A/N:  This has been on hold for such a long time, and I’ve just been so busy with life, it’s been hard to keep up, but hey i’m back bitches and I’m finally writing again, go me.  So please enjoy the long awaited Part Five of Gone.  P.S. sorry if I stress you out at all with this one, shit gets real intense oops.  P.P.S. my requests are still open right now, but I will close them soon, so any more requests you have, send them in while you can!!  Side note: this is my 100th post, how serendipitous.

Word Count: 2,009

Warnings: smutty morning oral sex my bad.

The familiar sound of your son’s cries woke you from your slumber.  Without thinking about it, you began to remove the bed sheets from your body, but something was weighing you down, making it hard to move.  You looked over to see what the lump on your stomach was, and images from the day before came flooding back to you when you saw Aaron sound asleep, his arm draped protectively across your torso.

You basked in the memories of the heartfelt reunion in the BAU bullpen, the smile on his face when he met his son for the first time, the feeling of Jack safely in your arms after three years of being deprived of it.  After three years of not knowing whether or not you’d ever see the two men in your life that you loved more than anything, suddenly they were under the same roof as you.

Everything just felt so right.

You gently removed Aaron’s arm from your body and stood up to put a shirt on.  Then you walked out the door to go aid your crying son.  Quietly, you made your way down the hall but stopped short when the crying faded.  Leaning your ear against the door to the nursery, you could hear Jack shushing the baby boy.

“It’s okay baby brother,” you heard the boy say, your heart fluttering at the sound of his soft and comforting voice.  “It’s alright AJ.  Shh.  Our mommy and daddy are sleeping.”

Did he just say…?

He did.  He called you his mom.

You covered your mouth with one hand and your heart with the other.  How did you get so damn lucky?

On your tiptoes, you quietly made your way back to your bedroom, tears threatening to fall from your eyes.  God, there was just too much crying that’s been going on lately…

Once you were back in your room, Aaron was sitting up in bed, rubbing the tiredness from his eyes.

“Morning,” you muttered, climbing back onto the bed.  You wasted no time wrapping yourself around his figure, still enjoying the feeling of him next to you.

“Why are you up?” he asked, kissing your arm that wrapped around his neck.

“AJ was crying but I heard Jack handling it.”  You smiled into his shoulder.  “He called me his mom.”

Aaron turned to face you, a subtle smile setting on his lips.  “I know.”  You furrowed your eyebrows, confused.  “Before we left, he was worried about you.  He kept telling me that he saw you as a mother and how he didn’t want to lose another one.  It just made it harder on me, too, knowing I was taking that away from him a second time.”

The memory of them leaving ached your heart.  “Stop, okay?  I’m done hearing that.  Nothing but happy thoughts right now,” you said, pulling him into a hug.  Until you have to leave again, you thought, but you pushed it away, pressing your lips to Aaron’s.  “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he replied, pulling you to lay on the bed.  Slowly, he ran his fingers against your skin, down your body.  They left goosebumps in their wake, causing you to shiver.  You moaned as his mouth was on yours again.

“The kids are awake,” you whispered as he took of the shirt you’d put on earlier.

“Then you’re going to have to keep quiet,” he replied with a smirk, his lips making their way down your body.  He was peppering kisses down your body, on your neck, collarbone, breasts, and stomach.  He clearly did not get enough love-making in the night before.

“Jack could come in here,” you warned him, gripping onto the bed sheets beneath you.  

“I’ll make this quick,” he said, hovering above your sex.  The feeling of his hot breath made you moan.  “Shh,” he warned, grabbing your hand.  

Without warning, his mouth was on you, licking up your arousal.  You sucked your bottom lip into your mouth, trying to hold back moans that were bubbling in your throat.  He took his time, licking clean up your slit at first then circling his tongue around your clit.  It was a blissful torture, seeming to be exactly what you needed this early in the morning.  

Using his free hand, he held down your restless hips.  

“Jesus just fuck me already,” you whisper-shouted, tired of the teasing.  He chuckled against your heat, the sensation causing you to moan.  

“Shhh,” he said again, a smile on his face.  He started rubbing his fingers against your folds, readying your entrance.  You placed a hand hard on your mouth, desperate to keep quiet.  Aaron was loving every second of this a little too much.  You internally groaned.

Without warning you, he inserted his fingers into you, quickly removing them and replacing them, again and again while his mouth worked at your bundle of nerves.  You tried to ignore the fact that your sons were a few feet away, both probably wide awake.  Biting the palm of your hand, you squeezed Aaron’s hand that was holding yours, signalling that you were close.

“Come for me,” he whispered against your clit, sending you straight over the edge.  You hit the wall of pure pleasure fast and hard, your legs shaking and thrusting your hips to ride out your high.  You successfully kept quiet, though, managing to keep your screams of euphoria under your breath.

Once you were spent, Aaron removed his finger and sucked from them your juices, smirking to himself.

“See?” he said.  “Just a couple minutes.”

You rolled your eyes as you panted, looking up at him.  He smiled down at you, getting up to nab a quick kiss before getting out of bed, throwing his boxers on and head out the door.  You sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

Everything just felt so right.

“We are all going to be there.  The whole team,” Emily said through the phone.

“I’ll check and make sure.  I don’t really know what his protective detail will say about it and I don’t even know how much long he’ll be here,” you replied, spooning AJ another bite of cereal.  The phone was positioned between your cheek and shoulder and you were feeding AJ with one hand, and yourself with the other.  Queen of multitasking, honestly.

“Funny you should say that, because I already talked to his detail,” she said. 

“Em, I told you-”

“I know, Y/N, but he’s our family, too.”

You sighed.  She was right, after all.  They’ve all known Aaron much longer than you have.

“Plus you had him all last night, give us some time with him, too.”  Emily’s voice was light and playful, trying to lighten the dark mood that surrounded you.  Happiness was definitely what you were feeling with Aaron and Jack here, but you knew it was only a matter of time that they would be gone again, so in the back of your mind lingered that feeling of sadness, eager to make itself known.

The BAU team lost a member that day when he left, you weren’t the only one.  You had to always keep that in mind.

“Like I said, I’ll talk to him.  I’m sure Jack would love it, but I have to make sure,” you said.

“Good.  And you can tell him his detail is okay with it.  As long as they’re with us,” she replied.  You could hear the smirk in her voice.  You smiled and shook your head.

“Bye.”  After hanging up the phone, Aaron walked into the kitchen with Jack in tow.

“Morning Y/N,” Jack said, giving you a hug.  “Good morning AJ!”   His smile was big and bright and beautiful.

“Hey buddy,” you replied, handing him AJ food.  “Mind feeding him for me?”  He nodded and sat down next to his brother.  You got up and followed Aaron to the stove, where he was starting to make bacon.

“Prentiss called me,” he said.  His face was impassive and his voice was low.

“I just got off the phone with her.  I’m guess she asked you the same thing,” you said, wrapping your arms around his stomach and leaning into his back.

“Y/N,” he grunted.  He wasn’t happy with the idea.  “That is way too risky.  We can’t.”  Despite his tone, he leaned slightly into you, letting you kiss his shoulder blades.

“How about instead of at her house, we just meet at the BAU?” you suggested, trying to persuade him.  They’ve missed out on him for three years, they needed this.  And he needed this.

“That’s hardly any safer,” he replied.  You could tell he wanted to try, but he really didn’t want to risk anything.

“You said yourself that your protective unit is the best you’ve ever dealt with and that you and Jack were safest at the BAU than anyplace,” you reminded him.  It was a battle to even get him to agree to come back to the house, but he trusted his detail.  He knew they were safe.

“I don’t know,” he said, finally looking at you.  You sighed and looked at his defeated face.  He was such a broken man.  He’d been tortured, stalked, and forced to leave by one man.  One person who had the power to bring down the strongest man you knew.  The only man you loved.

“They lost you too, Aaron,” you said, looking into his eyes, that were filled suddenly with tears.  “And you lost them.”  He pressed his lips together and blinked back the tears.  Your heart slowly broke at the sight.  He nodded, grabbing you and silently crying into your shoulder.  You held him to you, gently rubbing his back and looking behind him at your boys, who were oblivious.  Jack was happily feeding AJ, AJ happily eating his food.

Despite the heaviness in the room, everything just felt so right.

“You know I would tell you if I could,” Aaron said, looking at Reid.

“I just wish I knew where I could go if I ever needed to tell you anything,” the genius replied.  The team had been conversing for a while now, mainly asking him questions he knew he couldn’t answer.

“We could find a place to have a dead letter drop,” Emily said matter-of-factly as if it was obvious.  “That’s a method of communicating through espionage-”

“We know what a dead letter drop is,” JJ said, cutting Emily off with a smirk.

“As fun as that would be, I still don’t think it’s a good idea,” Aaron admitted, holding AJ on his lap.

“Fine, fine,” Emily said.  “Was worth a shot.”

“I’m going to go get more ice, can you come with me JJ?” you asked the blond, standing up from the round table.  She nodded, shoving one last cheeto in her mouth before standing up and following you out the door, the sound of laughter fading behind you.

“It’s just so good to see him again,” she said as you walked towards the entrance of the bullpen.

“I know you’ve all missed him just as much as I have so it made sense he’d spend some more time with everyone,” you replied.

“He’s always-” JJ started, but she stopped short when something caught her eye.  You followed her line of sight, you heart dropping at what you saw.  “Oh my god,” she said as she ran towards Chad, one of the men on Aaron’s protective detail.  He was laying in the middle of the floor, lifeless and covered in blood.

You ran up to be beside her, heart pumping.  “No, oh my god.”

She checked his pulse.  “Y/N you need to get Aaron.  Now,” she said frantically.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

That voice.  

It was an eerily familiar one.

It was the voice that drove your family away from you.  The voice that taunted your dreams for years.

Before you could scream, two shots rang out and the world turned black.

Because even when everything just feels so right, it can all fall apart in the blink of an eye.

[saharamae21]

Unrequited Love (Chapter Eight) - Topper Fanfic

Authors: @sguymon21​​ and @outerbongs​​ Check out chapter 7 on her page!

WARNING: Light mentions of abuse

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When I told him it was dad, he’s face contorted. I knew that he wished he was there to stop it. He knew that this was the kind of beating he would usually get. I told him I was okay, but he didn’t meet my gaze. He just stared down at the floor, ashamed. I muttered out an apology for the things I had said earlier. I told him I didn’t mean it and I was sorry, but he just cut me off. He told me it was fine. He went and grabbed me a new ice pack from the freezer and for the first time I looked at John B. He didn’t say anything, He just looked at me with a sad expression before looking away uncomfortably. Seemed about right.

“Hey, we're back! Who's ready to-” I heard Kie say. She looked at me and stopped. She looked at me and said nothing. Next to her was Pope and Sarah Cameron. One look at her and I knew that she had taken my place. They didn’t notice that I wasn’t around because she was here. She had filled my position. Kie knelt in front of me and asked me if I needed anything. She didn’t ask if I was okay, but she was showing interest and that was almost enough for me.

“Looking a little rough there, AJ,” Sarah said with a snicker. In some ways she was just like her brother. Same stuck up energy and this mean girl persona that I just didn’t understand. Yet, I knew why Topper is or was still in love with her. She was from a prominent family and had everything I didn’t. She was beautiful and would never have to work a day in her life if she didn’t want to and looking at her made me feel sick. “What’s it like playing rebound?”

“Shut up, Sarah,” I said. I rolled my eyes at her and listened to the boys jump in about my situation with Topper. They muttered things like that they didn’t want me to get hurt or that I needed to be careful.

“Don’t sugarcoat it for her guys,” Sarah said, jumping back in. “If you don’t tell it to her face, she won’t ever get it. Topper Thornton will never end up with someone like you.”

“And John B will end up with someone like you?” I snapped back. The tension in the room was building as I stood up. I wasn’t scared of her.

“All I’m saying is that you would be a girl Topper would have a fling with. A girl that he would have an affair with later in life. The only thing he cares about is what others think of him and what his parents think of him and you will never be good enough in their eyes,” she said. “Right now, he needs something to take his mind off of me and that’s you. Don’t go thinking you’re anything more than JJ Maybank’s younger sister.”

“Kay,” I said while hastily, throwing my dirty clothes into my backpack. I listened to Pope speak up for the first time. He told me that I shouldn’t just leave. JJ grabbed onto my arm, but I ripped it away. He told me that Topper was getting into my head. That he didn’t care about me. I looked at him with pain as I stood up for myself for the first time. “No JJ, you guys don’t care about me!”

“AJ, that’s bullshit and you know it,” he said.

“Really JJ? Do you know what it’s like to live in your shadow? I’ve never acted out and I’ve never gotten in a fight, but since I’m your sister I get stared at everywhere I go! People associate the Maybank name with psychotic and self destructive tendencies!” I heard him scoff at me as I continued on. “Do you know what it’s like to grow up here? With you four? The constant feeling of being left out. The constant feeling that I wasn’t good enough to be closer with you all? I get why John will let her speak to me like that, he’s fucking whipped, but you three? My own brother? You guys have never truly cared about me and that’s really shitty. For the first time I felt seen and heard and you guys want to take it from me.”

No one said a thing. They looked at me as I picked up my backpack and walked out the front door. Nowhere in mind and nowhere to go. I began to walk down the driveway. I could hear Kiara running after me. If anyone was going to try and see if I was okay after that it was her.

“AJ, wait!” I turned to look at her. Tears streamed down my face as she pulled me into a hug. I didn’t hug her back. I just stood there and let everything sink in. “AJ, where are you going? You can’t go back home.”

“I’ll find a place,” I muttered. She looked at me and I knew that Kie felt bad. I knew she wanted me around, unlike the others. She told me I could always crash at her place if I needed somewhere to go. I smiled a little bit and nodded.

“You know you’re like my sister right?” she asked. I could see that this was eating her alive. I told her I knew. I thanked her and told her that I couldn’t stay any longer. I looked at the chateau a final time. The place that once felt like home, now felt suffocating. It was a feeling that I knew all too well.

I sighed and walked down the south side of the island. Nothing today had gone quite the way I had imagined it. I had no food or clothing other than what was in my bag. I had barely any money and I had no place to stay. I climbed over the branches on the boneyard and threw my stuff in the sand. This summer was supposed to be legendary, but for the most part it’s been a disaster. I shimmied out of my shorts and tank top, revealing my black bikini. I walked down to the water and submerged myself. The salt burned my wounds, but the water felt so nice around me. I could stay here all day.

I had probably been at the beach for a few hours when other people began to show up. I stayed far enough from the huge groups of people, but I couldn’t help watching them. The kooks were down far enough that I bet they didn’t even notice me. I stood in the water, enjoying the sounds of the waves around me when I felt his arms. I giggled knowingly as his torso was against my back. A warm and fuzzy feeling filled my body as I turned to see him. Before I could even see his whole face, his lips met mine. It was a quick peck, but still my stomach filled with butterflies.

“Hey,” I said with a giggle. I looked up at him and Sarah’s words echoed through me. He saw my expression change and asked me what was wrong. I stared up at him and knew I had to express what I was feeling. “Top, I-I don’t let people into my life very often. I need to know that this is real for you… I need to know that you’re not going to leave in a couple days or weeks because everyone I’ve cared about leaves and I can’t do this if you’re just going to leave.”

A face of guilt washed over him quickly. He pulled me into his chest and told me he wouldn’t leave. He told me he wouldn’t hurt me, but his voice was shaky. It was as if he was trying to convince himself more than he was trying to convince me. I decided that that was good enough for now and walked out of the water with him. I dried off and pulled my clothes on. I looked over at the Kooks on the other side of the beach and wondered if they noticed Topper was missing. I heard my stomach rumble and heard Topper chuckle.

“Wanna go get some food?” he asked. I wondered if it was okay to leave his friends over there, but I wanted to spend time with him. I nodded and we walked to his car together. We drove back into town and got out by The Wreck. The smell of food was enough to make my mouth start salivating. We were on our way in, his hand in mine, when her voice rang out from behind us. He instantly pulled his hand away and my heart dropped. I turned around and realized why he was so quick to let go. Dr. Thornton stood behind us.

“What are you doing?” she yelled at him. I could see the look on his face. I could see that she was upset with him and it killed me. I knew how much he wanted her approval. I knew how much his mom’s opinion of him mattered. I watched as he tried to stutter out what was going on.

“Dr. Thornton, this is my fault. I asked him to meet with me,” I said. “You see, my brother, JJ. Well he’s the one who owes you guys restitution. I-I was just asking him to drop the charges. Thirty thousand dollars is a lot, ma’am. I just thought if I talked to Topper, he might understand.”

I watched as she raised her hand like she was going to hit me.

“Mom,” Topper said firmly. The look on his face made me think back to Sarah’s words. Dr. Thornton looked at me and lowered her hand.

“I would hit you for speaking directly to me, but it looks like your dad did enough damage for the both of us,” her words cut through me like a knife. I swallowed hard, understanding what Sarah meant. I would never be good enough for his family.

“Mom!” he said, knowing how her words were affecting me.

“She’s a filthy Pogue, Topper. Stop feeling bad for her.” She snapped. I stared at her as she grabbed Topper by the wrist and told him to come with her. “Get away from her before you catch Rabies or something.”

I watched as his mom pulled him away from me. I bit the inside of my cheek and closed my eyes, trying to find a way to stop the tears from forming. Why would I never be good enough for anyone?

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