#i wish i could annotate my posts so i could give side thoughts and reasonings for every single sentence

[roseworth]

Wait, I’m confused do you or do you not ship Jayrose?

short answer: usually no but ill ship it when its funny

long answer:

most of the reason i dont personally like it is because i see rose as a lesbian and i dont enjoy any ships of her with men (its fine if other people do! its just not my thing), plus i hc jason as aroace so im also not very interested in jason ships unless im in a very specific mood (the "specific mood" being jaykyle lmao. every few months i get really obsessed with jaykyle for a few days then i forget about it for the next few months. then the cycle repeats)

another reason i dont like it is that i am constantly in fear of rose becoming Jason's Girlfriend in comics and online. like how babs and kory are both seen as Dick's Girlfriend (also steph and tim to a lesser degree atm) and people refuse to engage with their character not in reference to their boyfriend, so writers have them constantly mention their relationship with dick even in comics that hes not in (like batgirls having dick show up randomly/birds of prey (1999) having babs talk about dick alllll the time, or kory in the current blue beetle run constantly mentioning dick even though theyre not dating rn and jaime has never even met dick). and thats somewhat starting to happen with rose where shes only in comics that jason is in and if jasons not in it then jason gets mentioned (see: catwoman #62). and obv as a rose fan i really don’t want that to happen because she’s such a great character outside of jason and i don’t want her to be reduced to just who she is with him. this is mostly me overreacting, especially since she had a miniseries just last year that jason was not in or mentioned at all. but being a fan of a female comic character means that most people are not willing to talk about her without mentioning her relationship with a man, and its even worse when the man is a batboy so i’m constantly on alert

so basically thats why it puts a bad taste in my mouth, but i have no issue with the ship itself or anyone who ships it!

i think jason & rose are extremely compatible. i see them as bffs but i genuinely do think about them in a relationship a lot even though i dont necessarily ship it. im rotating both of them in my mind 24/7 so i think about how i think they would act in a relationship & how it would ideally be done in canon. but i just dont trust any comic writers to actually respect rose

the reason i said that jayrose is one of the only jason ships that matters is because most jason ships are soooo bad... i wont name names but some jay ships rely on one or both of them being extremely out of character for it to work at all. in terms of jason ships, jayrose is one of the best just because a) an in-character jason AND an in-character rose would genuinely get along really well and b) none of the stories that they've been in have really been THAT out of character (with the exception of gotham war imo, which i went into here so i wont beat a dead horse. dceased was pretty bad too but that’s tom taylor’s fault it has nothing to do with jayrose). also unlike many other jason ships, a good portion of the people that ship jayrose are the ones who actually read the comics so it tends to be an actual Nuanced and Accurate portrayal. ofc there are many exceptions to that but as of rn jayrose is not one of the Certified Batfam Ships (you know those ships that are the only ships that fanon fans know about so whenever they want to give their fav a boyfriend they shove em with another character they know nothing about. like dick/wally where people say "well they were friends in yja thats enough for me" and they havent read anything with wally in it besides dick/wally fanfic and they dont care about him outside of his relationship with dick), so theyre somewhat safe. but unfortunately because of titans tv its also shipped by The Worst Man You've Ever Met so. you win some you lose some ig

it bothers me when people claim that they dont like jayrose because they "dont like what it does to rose" ???? literally when has jayrose ever been bad for rose. her worst out of character moments have nothing to do with jason in any way. she doesnt get sidelined for him and she doesnt get reduced to a damsel in distress or something. its annoying to me that people feel the need to make up an excuse for why they dont like the ship so they use rose as a scapegoat and pretend that theyre doing it for her when they actually dont know anything about her. just say you dont like it and move on! you dont need to justify it you can just not like it

so for the most part i have no issue with it, which is why i tend to mention it when i think its funny. theres a lot of jayrose content that i enjoy bc theyre fun together and i like seeing them interact! i dont ship them but i think its a good ship <3

however. despite all that i still have more thoughts. im playing devil's advocate against myself and disagreeing with everything i just said

because also. its kind of not in character for them to date. i like where they're at right now because theyre kind of in a casual thing, like theyre hanging out and having sex in the bushes but theyre not Dating. theyre not in a serious relationship that we've seen (other than gotham war but im not acknowledging that), so i like where they're at right now. hanging out, rose flirting aggressively and jason giving her next to nothing in return because he cant flirt, and probably having sex off panel*. i think theyre in a good place at the moment and i dont want it to change from exactly where it is right now in canon. *inside my head theyre actually just pals that pretend to flirt because they think its funny. they do not have sex off panel and they dont want to but the insane flirting is an inside joke that no one else thinks is funny. but thats just me

because neither of them has really shown any interest in dating (when written in character! so we're not counting rhato). the most "interested" jason has ever been in someone is minor flirting with donna in countdown. but he did not make a move on her and repeatedly said throughout that book that he was only focused on the mission and did not care about anything else. he doesnt seem to actually be interested in a relationship with anyone, partially because hes extremely emotionally closed off (to a degree. he is VERY open with his emotions, but hes not the kind of person that lets people into his life easily) and also because he just has other shit to think about. no sex only vengeance.

and ROSE. she is the most closed off person you will ever see. she will have casual sex in an effort to suppress all emotions (which i could talk about extensively. but thats not what this post is about), but she doesnt date people. the only people that she was close to being in a relationship with were eddie and hosun. with eddie, it was all flirting, emotional moments, and her pushing him away. she genuinely liked him (arguably. i could go into how its comphet but that is once again not what this is about), but she was closed off and didnt want to date him because she has so many issues. she tried to make him jealous and did her aggressive flirting thing like she does with jason, but she did not want to have an actual relationship with him. and with hosun, she once again (arguably) genuinely liked him, but she did not tell him that. she MARRIED HIM and still didnt talk to him about her feelings. he liked her and was interested in a relationship with her, but she did not want to embrace that and didnt make any effort to have a real relationship with him outside of agreeing to stay married to him after slade was arrested. she doesnt have any interest in actually dating the guys she likes, and shes so emotionally repressed that she will not make any effort to even be close with them

i hate phantom-one and i hate the idea of rose dating phantom-one but. i genuinely think their "relationship" is pretty in character for her (brisson understands her so well), because at most they have some nice conversations. shes somewhat interested in him so she'll come onto him a bit (no aggressive flirting but still), and she opens up to him when shes at her absolute lowest, then she leaves. shes more focused on what stormwatch is doing and she shows little interest in phantom-one during missions, but she likes him and oscillates between ignoring him and hitting on him. so.. out of the relationships rose has in recent canon..... i could make the argument that rose/phantom-one is more in character for her than jayrose even though i like jayrose a LOT more than i like rose/phantom-one

so yeah. its in character for them to get along. but i DONT think its in character for them to be in a serious relationship. which is another part of the reason im kinda skeptical about their relationship in canon, just because i dont want it to be an actual Relationship since it doesnt really make sense for them to actually date given... everything about them.

but again thats all just my opinion! ship whatever you want we're all just playing with dolls

[littleclownopinions]

Why the Funtime Animatronics are terrifying

Content Warning: Mentions of child murder

My last post was a design analysis of Ballora in which I talked about all the reasons I find her so haunting. I had a lot of fun writing it and so I thought, why not do it for the rest of the Funtimes? Although I will be mentioning her, I wont be going into much detail, so if you want to check out the full post you can do so here. Otherwise, I want to take a look at each animatronic, going over their aesthetic design as well as their blueprints, voice lines and gameplay mechanics to explain why I love them and maybe share some theories too. I will be annotating the blueprints as I understand the small text could be hard to read. So, without further ado, let's get into it!

Funtime Foxy

"A performance was demanded of me, and now I have delivered! Encore!"

Keeping in mind the whole Circus theme, I think Foxy most closely resembles a Ringmaster. The shape of his torso, the red in his bowtie and the loud booming voice we hear in UCN sells that for me. I think my favourite thing about this iteration of Foxy is how alive he looks. It's not everyday we get a Foxy that is so shiny and new! Now, Funtime Foxy's blueprints are pretty easy to understand but there are two interesting things to note. The first is that section D directs the reader to "Circus Baby dir07" meaning the remote activation of his floor anchor is controlled by her. The second is his size, he is the shortest and the lightest of the four. All in all, Funtime Foxy isn't the most intimidating of the bunch, I'd say despite the sharp teeth he actually looks quite cute and friendly. However, there's a reason for that. Funtime Foxy wasn't made to kill, he was made to lure. He, like Ballora, was created to help keep guests entertained to distract them away from Funtime Freddy and/or Circus Baby, the two animatronics big enough to store the bodies of the victims, the two designed to kill. Although Funtime Foxy doesn't speak in SL, his UCN voice lines all relate to him performing. His UCN gameplay also sees the player keeping track of showtime, the player being jump scared if they aren't watching his stage once the time ticks over. Again, Funtime Foxy is an entertainer, luring guests to his stage to keep attention away from Circus Baby and Funtime Freddy when their.. other services are needed.

Funtime Freddy

"Bon-Bon, Say hi to our friends!"

Again with the Circus theme, I think Funtime Freddy resembles a Magician. He has the black bowtie, the top hat and he even has a little bunny friend, Bon-Bon! Although, I don't think Freddy can pull him out of his hat.. Honestly, I think he is kind of adorable, especially with his little hand puppet Bon-Bon at his side, but his blueprints are where things start to get more ominous. Ignoring the glaringly obvious child body inside Freddy's stomach, each section gives us something pretty intriguing. Bon-Bon allows him to essentially have eyes on the back of his head, while he himself can mimic voices and keep track of how close his victim is. As mentioned above, I think Funtime Freddy is one of the two killer animatronics, alongside Circus Baby. However, Funtime Freddy raises some questions. Why is he significantly smaller than Circus Baby? Does he have the same claw inside his stomach? Well, I believe that he probably does have the same claw, but because he doesn't need space for the internal ice cream dispenser or the air hose attachment like Circus Baby has, he has no need to be as big. Afterall, he has Bon-Bon and his voice mimicking feature to lure kids in! If you yourself have a different theory, please feel free to let me know!

Circus Baby

"You won't die, but you'll wish you could."

Everybody's favourite little (huge) Jester, Circus Baby, isn't really one that needs much explanation from me. We all know what she looks like and we all know what she's capable of. Despite her blueprints wanting you to believe she is totally innocent, her voice lines and minigame tell us a different story. What I want to explore is why she was designed to look like a Jester. For those who aren't aware, Jester's privilege is the ability and right of a Jester to talk and mock freely without being punished. In a way, Jesters were free to question and mock the King because of this privilege. We know Circus Baby was modelled after Elizabeth Afton, but maybe she was also designed as a Jester to signify Elizabeth's place beside her father, William Afton, and how she would often disobey (question/mock) her father's orders, the way she did when Circus Baby killed her. Her being the tallest, most powerful animatronic and having remote control over functions inside Funtime Foxy and Ballora also serves to remind us how important she is. Just food for thought. Anyway, I love Circus Baby because I think her lore is incredibly interesting, but I also simply love her design. She was so unlike anything we'd ever seen before in the franchise and she really breathed new life into the story.

Overall, I think the Funtimes are really fascinating because they were so unlike anything that came before them. The idea of Circus Baby's Pizza World was so different and this was the first time we saw animatronics that were undeniably created for the purpose of killing. By the time of Pizzeria Simulator we also found out about the scooper being used to experiment with Remnant. Sister Location is, to this day, one of my favourite FNAF games and I will never forget the feeling I got watching the opening cutscene, seeing the secret ending to Circus Baby's minigame or even seeing Ennard through the Scooping Room window. I am really excited to see what comes from the upcoming release of Five Nights at Freddy's: Help Wanted 2 and I can't wait to write more design analysis posts and theories of some of my other favourites from across the franchise!

[mgsapphire]

Ethics and morality... and how they're not the same...

Weird title, and I don't even know if I'll properly approach this one with all the topics I wish to this discuss in today's The Devil Judge essay, because a lot of things peaked my interest, I was debating on doing a separate post for each subject, but I'll do them all in here:

Starting simple

I know we're only 4 episodes in, but I want to break down the things that I often look for in a new show:

Cinematography

Soundtrack

Character building

Plot devices

Social commentary (sometimes)

Of course, these are things most people would consider basics, but I find that a lot of TV shows don't have enough balance in them. Also, cinematography and soundtrack are pretty up there for me because when a plot gets slow, or something like that, I stay for those two (biggest example: King Eternal Monarch).

The soundtrack in The Devil Judge is amazing and the cinematography can be a character of its own. They really get me hooked and are used as tools to properly tell a story. And I'll get into that further down this post.

The onlooker will never understand the actor

Experience is your best friend not only applies to job hunting, but it's true in the real world too. You can't truly weigh in on something unless you've experienced it yourself, you can give it your judgment and everything, but when bad things happen to someone, you'll never truly understand their pain. Am I bringing up because of the difference of mind in Judge Kang and Judge Kim's opinions? On how the public treated the minister's son? No. I'm talking about a very specific scene, where the cinematography told me to think that way and not the dialogue (it's that easy for my mind to be swayed). In episode 3, when the rich are about to dine right after the foundation's commercial for a better future, we see this aerial shot:

What's interesting about this? The seclusion and the enclosed feeling it conveys as a counterpart to the poverty shots we were just shown. Yet, these are the people making ads for a better future, what do they know?

They live comfortably behind concrete walls with no windows to see what goes on apart from the bubble they live in. This idea is further enforced at the party in episode 4, where they're not even a part of the donations, and watch and mock from afar as spectators. Yet, these people call the shots. They even call it commenting, as if they were watching the pain of others on TV.

The intriguing personality and the duality it encites

Now, this was a costume and wardrobe decision, but it was also very well thought of:

Judge Kim wears white and Judge Kang wears black. One is morally perceived by viewers of the show as morally good and the other is perceived as morally dubious at best. However, besides the costume and wardrobe thought put into this, we also have to think about the delivery of this scene and how it may further affect my detailing of this section. Judge Kang brings down the coats, and hangs over the coat to Judge Kim, he's the one who is making that annotation: You're pure, I'm tainted. This can have one of two interpretations:

Either Judge Kang believes Judge Kim to be pure and innocent due to his status as a rookie in the field

Or he believes Judge Kim to be morally white and himself morally black as he's looking at his brother's face and not at Judge Kim's heart.

Because most of the back story we're unveiling is through Judge Kim's perception, there's also an inherit bias we're having as well, because in Judge Kim narrative, he believes he's doing what's right and believes Judge Kang to be evil. In being served information about Judge Kang through Judge Kim's eyes, our bias is inherently skewed.

Another thing is that, when they put on the coat, they're standing in front of the other, as if the producers of this series are telling us they're two sides of the same coin.

The duality is made in more deceitful ways, which include:

A difference of classes that implies one has suffered while the other has not.

A difference of experience that implies one is more tainted while the other is pure.

A difference of age that implies one is a sly fox while the other one is is bunny about to be eaten.

A difference of temper that makes one erratic and the other logical.

Power dynamics

This one, in this one I could make a whole thesis based on just a couple of scenes in the drama. And you know I have to mention it: director Jung being the puppeteer.

It may not be as unexpected at first, nevertheless it brings forward a lot of things I've wished to touch upon for quite some time now. A woman being a puppeteer of an old man in the portrayed dystopia that The Devil Judge is painting makes much more sense than more common demonstrations of these dynamics where it's either a:

A man of power being controlled by a bigger man of power.

A man of power being controlled by a seemingly man of a lower status.

A woman being controlled by a man of power.

Although, there's nothing wrong with those power dynamics, and if they were to be used, a message could also be conveyed, this one in particular works as a megaphone.

A subversion of power in such a way can be interpreted as a true indication of the weak overcoming the powerful. Why? It is not that woman are naturally weaker than men, but that in society, patriarchy has been a big factor in taking voice away from women in order to give it to men.

In order for Director Jung to achieve her purposes, it's smarter for her to do it under the pretense that an old rich man in power is the one calling the shots.

This is better exemplified by her stance when the old man tries to excuse his behavior, and what her moral compass is. I'm not saying I agree with her unethical conduct, but that her morality is directly impacted by the perception of the public of her as a weak woman:

Just because a dog bites a human does the person get dirty?

This is telling on how she perceives the actions of the old man in gropping the waitress. She didn't do anything wrong, even if you touched her, you are the dirty one.

While she's evil, it's a refreshing and deep evil.

The public's opinion and how there's actually logic in the show's portrayal

The public opinion can make or break a person, even if it's not on a public trial like this. While "cancel culture" barely works in today's society, a person's reputation is forever tainted. The show does tell that, but it also exhibits the scary downside of it, by showing how easily it was to make people accept flaggelation as a fitting punishment.

There are many experiments that have tried to test the effect of societal pressure on an individual's decision and the effect of the authority's enforcement of power in the outcome of these decisions. Furthermore, theories based on analysis of human behavior not necessarily relying on experiments can also help break this down. What do I mean? Here's a small attempt at explaining:

Milgram Experiment on Authority: which measured the individual willingness to carry out actions that go against their conscience due to an authority's approval.

Argument from Authority; The idea that people are more likely to use an authority's opinion on something as an argument for their reason. This is often seen in science, where trusted authorities have done the research and offer it to the public. In here, authority bias also plays a role, as we often believe, at first, that an authority must be right.

Moral disengagement: basically speaking, because this is evil or bad, I'm not part of it and I most probably am not actively participating in it. One may disengage by moral justification, which means that before engaging in something that has been previously perceived as immoral, I'm changing my stance on it based on what I tell myself to be logical arguments. This particular form of moral disengagement is very effective in changing the public opinion. I'll be touching on another form further down this post.

Other factors played a part, but these ones in particular came to mind when public flagelation as a form of corporeal punishment was wildly accepted. First, an authority is the one telling them it's correct, to go ahead. Secondly, another authority (the minister) had previously shown approval to such unusual punishment. Thirdly, they are not the ones to be engaging directly in the act, and even if they were, it would be acceptable because an authority has told them so. They may even believe the punishment to be a necessary evil for the greater good.

In fact, the minister's son was actually correct when pleading his case, they were accepting it because it wouldn't affect them directly.

Regarding the cinematographic descent of the public opinion regarding the situation can better be exemplified by the old man we've seen through the episodes.

Does suffering justify misdeeds?

Today I came along the difference between excuse and reason. You may give a reason for your behavior, but it doesn't excuse it.

Not because I've suffered through shit, means I have to make you suffer too.

I may explain myself, but it's on the other side to excuse me.

Why I hate the unreliable narrator and why I love it so much

This story has been told mostly through the eyes of Judge Kim and what he hears and sees regarding Judge Kang, if anything, the narrative is very close to that of the narrative we've seen in The Great Gatsby. An enigmatic man is being narrated to us from the eye of a man who hasn't known him for a long time.

How is that an unreliable narrator? The narrator has their own set of bias and moral standards which function as lenses through which they see the world.

Another way of putting it would be the way teenage romances are often written in a first person narrative where either of the two teenagers is the narrator, so the author can sell to us something as simple as offering a pack of gum as the most romantic act on earth. We're perceiving interactions through rose tainted glasses.

In this case, we're seeing the interactions through Judge Kim's eyes who doesn't trust Judge Kang from the get go due to his own preset bias.

The narrative becomes even more unreliable as we're not exactly sure if what Judge Kang disclosed himself is a fact.

The reason why I love this narrative is because it leaves a lot of space to make simple plot twists to a narrative and make them seem grand, and can elongate a story without making it obvious.

The reason why I hate it is because sometimes, in tv shows mostly, we as viewers can see the other side of the story and grow increasingly frustrated with the main character's prejudice and misunderstandings (I'm looking at you my beloved Beyond Evil).

Also, because I have to wait for a long time before I actually have a clear picture of it.

[tragedynatural]

Hey I know you posted it like a month ago but I would love a detailed song-by song reasoning/annotations for your Sam/jake mix. If you have time it would be great to hear your thoughts!

anon i've never jumped so hard at the chance to explain my totally normal thought process in depth before. thank you! yes of course! i will try to be as brief as possible! but probably not!

the first caveat i have to give you is that this mix was based mostly on a concept where cold oak lasts for ~2 weeks. so there's time for complicated relationships and despair to set in and a lot of this won't match the like..two days? it takes in the show. also this tracklist might be different from the post. i was editing.

we must be killers (mikky ekko) - "children of the wild ones" - references demon blood and my loose interpretation of what it might feel like to have these burgeoning powers, and then the "killer" refrain is because imo a key part of boyking4boyking is about how they both Know one of them is going to die, probably by the other's hand. also i'm compelled by similarities i see between jake and sam and both have spent their adult lives (hunting, military) being trained to kill. and i think neither of them want to do that, and in this situation they're forced to consider killing their peers..oof. thinking about jake's face when he has to kill ava, thinking about how sam and jake have been in situations where they've needed to kill someone in order to ensure the safety of someone else (in the logic of spn universe's approach to hunting & military)

like real people do (hozier) - this is abt that sense of knowing i was talking about. in the 2 week cold oak au jake and sam both find out from azazel early on how things are supposed to go. and they spend a week not killing each other! but they don't know each other very well and each fears that the other will snap first. "i will not ask why you were creeping / in some sad way i already know" - a sense of like, scorpion-and-frog anticipation that the other's going to turn on you but wanting to prolong the peace before it happens. also this dynamic is a product of a horrible time for them, they know that they probably won't both make it out - the "kiss like real people do" refrain is about an idle wish of like, what would it have been like if we were normal?

damn these vampires (the mountain goats) - i just like this song i think. this was rlly about the atmosphere, capturing the sense of being changed against your will that jake is reckoning with for the first time and sam is still struggling with. also, you know, there's a little bit of a defiant feel to this song. "scream when captured... let this whole town hear your knuckles crack." at this point they think maybe they can refuse to play along with azazel, and that it might be possible to get out anyway.

our time is short (gang of youths) - look, you know, rn they've been here for a ~week? they're not sure if they're ever making it out. the other kids died in the first couple days so it's just jake and sam and i think they're going through 'last 2 people on earth' feelings at warp speed. this is .... a moment of feeling good b/c they know it won't last very long, and there's a bit of last hurrah energy. "so let's drink the best wine now..before lightning strikes us down" etc.

another place (bastille) - the jake/sam connection is a genuine feeling but it's also very much....a foxhole thing to quote bobby. they like each other genuinely but both are aware this is the result of an extraordinary situation. even if they were both getting out alive...they live completely different lives. this song is about, don't make this more than it is because even though maybe we'd both want it to be, it's not attainable.

heavy in your arms (florence + the machine) - "who is the betrayer? / who's the killer in the crowd?" is absolutely my concept for the 2 week cold oak. sam and jake being plagued by dreams from yellow-eyes, and they don't want to suspect or betray the other but. well. they'll be stuck here forever. this is both of them wondering who'll crack first. also "heavy in your arms" is a little foreshadowing for when jake stabs sam and holds him while he bleeds out. thanks!

as the world caves in (matt maltese) - look. they're going to nuke each other up boys till old satan stands impressed...on their final night alive it's YOUUU that i lie with.... this is last few days of peace before Inevitable Conflict as the tension hits a peak. it's about "i like you and i care for you and i know eventually one of us is going to kill the other but i can't be the person to pick up the knife first. so every night i sleep across the fire from you and hope you fall asleep before i do." and azazel is there.

no one would riot for less (bright eyes) - "everything is eclipsed / by the shape of destiny" - the fact that the lives of the special children have been counting down to this moment! their hopes, dreams, personal morals, affections for others are eclipsed by fate baby! inescapable! the whole "little soldier" section is again about how both of them have been made into weapons to fight for various causes, and now they're being. pitted against each other. "love me now / hell is coming" and "help me out / hell is coming / could you do it now / hell is here" is obviously about them knowing shit is going to go down soon and also this sense of like. just kill me if you're going to. don't prolong the inevitable.

have to explode (the mountain goats) - similar theme here, feeling like you're counting down to the inevitable - "the stage is set / someone's going to do something someone else will regret" sam and jake are pieces in a plan that's been in motion for years and everyone's just waiting for them to buckle down and play the role. "the fuse will have to run out sometime / something here will eventually have to explode" - dean only finds sam once sam's been stabbed and jake has 'won'. if no victor emerges they stay here until one does, and they know that they can't hold out forever.

tusk (fleetwood mac) - i put this on every playlist sorry about me! also it's, okay, jake wakes up in the night to see sam stuck in a nightmare and he knows the demon's visiting both of them. what's it saying to him, he thinks, what's sam going to do? this is about creeping dread, and this sense that the person you're with maybe knows something you don't. that they're planning to betray you, that they already have. and musically the frantic melody and vocalization just ups the tension.

bite the hand (boygenius) - jake's pov. sam is the one who pushes for a truce and holding out for another option out of cold oak, and jake is on board. at first. but as time kicks on he realizes that there's no other option whereas sam is still a little bit in denial. so the "i can't love you how you want me to / i'll bite the hand that feeds me / you want what i can't give to you / who do you think you are / who do you think i am / maybe i'm afraid of you" - is about him doing a heel turn where he realizes like, i can't do this (stay indefinitely here to find a dubiously-real other way out for a guy i just met) and sam can't do it either, and one of us is going to snap, and i'm afraid it'll be sam first.

i bet on losing dogs (mitski) - sam's perspective on ^ - he does know how it's going to end but he can't quite. give up on hoping that it won't. he doesn't kill jake when he has the chance. he must know jake'll kill him if he's not dead or knocked unconscious, but he hopes. that he won't. anyway. and he's wrong. he knows he'll be wrong, i think he can sense that jake is doing a heel turn but also, they're getting played by azazel who's planting seeds of doubt and they're stuck in this depressing place alone, and sam's not sure how much he can trust himself. he's betting on losing dogs.

samson (regina spektor) - "you are my sweetest downfall / i loved you first" - jake's pov on a guy he genuinely likes who he knows he's going to kill. before the fight & the cemetery they cared for each other. "we couldn't bring the columns down / we couldn't destroy a single one" - in the end trying to hold out against azazel does nothing, the gate opens, the apocalypse happens. it's futile. and the story never mentions jake or cold oak again - i think the fact that sam tried to like, help & protect the special kids & then had to watch andy, ava, and lily die, & then jake tried to kill him, & he had to kill jake is like. pretty fucked up. those are the last people like him on this earth man he was 23!

heaven or hell (digital daggers) - vibes! also: "i’ve got the same deep wounds as you / my love can double as a weapon too" - jake and sam's similarities are so key to me. either one of them could have been the person to turn first. i'm anti-trying to make jake into a bad guy for stabbing sam! he wanted to go home! "show me the side no one else sees / turn it back on me" - what's it like for sam to be around other special kids? does he feel more normal or less than he does with dean? thinking about that "it doesn't matter if we believe it only matters that they do" scene- SO interesting! what a cool moment of jake and sam connecting on a level of both being leaders, both knowing what a lose-lose situation looks like, both knowing how to keep the hope alive, and do what has to be done. of course this is also the trait that leads to jake killing sam / sam killing jake. they're the same.

old college try (the mountain goats) - this is specifically like, night before jake stabs sam. he knows he's going to kill sam by now. "i want to say i'm sorry for stuff i haven't done yet / things will shortly get completely out of hand" - jake thinking about this last like, goodbye. and "i will walk down to the end with you / if you will come all the way down with me" - seeing it through till the end, sam has a burgeoning sense of something wrong.

it seemed the better way (leonard cohen)- again i literally just put this one on everything i can. also you know, it's jake thinking about listening to azazel and killing sam. it seemed like the better way then, but now, when azazel's threatened his family and he realizes he can't get out of it, it's too late to go back in time and do it differently. he has to obey azazel + play along. "i better hold my tongue / i better take my place / lift this glass of blood / try to say the grace". yes i know this is about religion i'm not trying to make light of the song i just think. i'm squinting okay.

don't let me be misunderstood (nina simone) - LISTEN! JAKE'S INTENTIONS ARE GOOD. this is like, meeting in the cemetery and sam is alive and they both know what's passed between them and what can never be and where it has to go now, and jake's thinking "just remember that i'm not evil. just remember i have a family that i wanted to come back to like you, don't let where this went eclipse the fact that you cared about me, that you know i'm a good person." it's also me holding a large stick and pointing it at everyone in supernatural so that they remember that he did nothing wrong.

say goodbye (fleetwood mac) - okay bear with me. in my version. of cold oak jake doesn't get killed by sam. he kills azazel and sam and dean let him go. this is a retrospective on the whole thing for both of them. "i let you slip away / there was nothing I could do / that was so long ago, yeah / still I often think of you" and "so don't let it get you down / just a time within a time / just a scheme within a scheme / a little world within a world / yes, a dream, just a dream" are the thesis lyrics for this song. cold oak's done, azazel's nuked, back to the real world now. it's a bitter way to say goodbye to a person you cared about after they killed you/you killed them, even though you both sort of. expected it to go that direction. by this point i was just like IT FEELS RIGHT (adds to playlist).

[suck-my-tomato]

verse; post modern

The AA meeting was particularly hard to sit through, today. She’d been attending for only three months and yet her token of sobriety only reached a single month. That’s not what made Kimiko wracked with nerves today, however. It was Sasuke’s birthday. Cora hasn’t shown her face today, as of yet. That was the silver lining, at least. Once the meeting drew to a close, Kimiko lingered by her chair, gathering up the courage and wishing she could take the easy route with a stiff drink. Sasuke gives her a glance, catching her already looking. She throws a hand up without second thought, bracing her heels to the ground with a firm lipped smile - as it appears, he was approaching her. Instead, he gets intercepted by the ever-persistent Samuel; his timing was as impeccable as ever. Kimiko’s flitting glance catches a befallen expression on the face of Sasuke, her throat tight as he heads out the double doors. Fuck.

“Sam,” She tries to cut in as he steamrolls over her with an excited assumption that she would agree to his extensive plans for them this evening. Her eyes are locked to the doors - she’s hardly even listening. This is mounting her impatience, she just wanted to have a brief conversation with Sasuke, and now the moment might be slipping through her fingers like sand. “Samuel, please!” Her voice is suddenly expletive and clipped with her agitation. His expression and a few looks tossed over by the lingering members makes her face flush red with embarrassment. “Rain check, okay? I.. have do something really important to me, and I have to go do it right now.”

She grabs up her bag and escapes the room without hearing any more of what he has to say.

Outside now, Kimiko is squinting against the reflection of sunlight bouncing off of the white sidewalk, heart in her throat. Then, she spots him in his usual after-meeting cool-down spot. A slow string of smoke is expelled from his lips and makes her fingers itch to light up, herself. First thing is first. Get this over with.

Approaching his side as though he were a wild animal that could take off at the first sign of being cornered, Kimiko clears her throat and signals her presence. “Hey.” She mutters. So much for the courage she worked up; turns out it was all just hot air. He greets her as she’s digging around her bag. Out comes two slim boxes, gift wrapped in dark blue and ribboned with gold. She extends her hand and offers them in the empty space between old lovers. “I heard on the wind that it was your birthday today.” Once the gifts were in his hands, Kimiko clasps her fingers in front of her center and worries a swollen spot on the inside of her lip. “Happy 25th, Sasuke.”

He opens his gifts to reveal a new set of fine haired paint brushes and an array of oil paints, along with a package of fresh charcoal. A simple birthday card is annotated with her handwriting at the bottom: ‘Thank you for everything. Love, Kimiko’ When he thanks her, Kimiko hopes the red of her cheeks can be explained away by the summer sun. “What’s a birthday without a gift?” She catches a glimpse of her signature on the opened card. Oh. Oh. So it would appear that old habits don’t ‘die hard’ - they just never die, at all.

With an attempt for a quick change of subject, Kimiko is already parting her lips to stumble into a new topic of conversation; anything to serve as a distraction from that single four lettered word. For as true as it was, the endearment felt.. like a bruise, at this moment in time. At least, that’s how Kimiko assumed it might feel.

“So - I can only assume that Naruto is dragging you by the ears to dinner tonight? Or,” Her mouth feels gummy as she considers the far more obvious option. “Cora probably has something planned for you too, I’d guess.”

The fact that there was a meeting on his birthday seemed… fitting, seeing how pervious birthdays were spent with a key blade to his nostril or bottles to his lips. While, sure, he wanted to do anything but being at a meeting, it was at least a way to start his day. Cora has already sent him a huge multi paragraph text about how they are going to spend the day together, what they are going to do and that she will meet him at his place after the meeting because she still had a last minute birthday gift she wanted to pick up for him. She’s doing the most for his birthday, something that hasn’t been done for him since high school or so when Kimiko would make a great deal of it with their friends. Speaking of Kimiko, he threw her a glance as he was exiting the gym the meetings were held in before heading outside to grab a smoke.

Sasuke hadn’t even considered that she would speak to him today or not, he really did not know what to feel about her being back because it was like staring in the face of a long lost loved one. He had all these mixture of emotions towards her, the love that was clearly still there for her but the knowledge of how incredibly toxic they were together plus the fear that if, for whatever reason, they tried to get back together that it would just bring out the worst in one another again. At the sound of her voice, Sasuke released the exhale of smoke into the air before turning to look at her very curiously. ‘She remembered?’ He thought to himself as he extended a hand, then opened the gift which was something so small and probably meaningless to someone else but the fact that she got him exactly what he was planning on going to go buy today made his heart swell. “Thank you, Kimiko.” Eyes lingered on the little ‘love’ marking in her handwriting, the corner of his lips in a small smile at how many memories were attached to her writing that on paper for him.

“I think Naruto will be at the dinner tonight.” Sasuke spoke up to confirm her statement. “Cora is throwing me a birthday dinner at Ayoama Ramen around 8 tonight. Since it’s my birthday, you’re free to come if you want.” He added the last bit in there smoothly as he relid the birthday gift and gave her a nod. “I hope to see you there, Kimiko. Thank you, again, for the gift.” Sasuke held it up in a little wave before turning to head back down the street to his apartment.

[bugaboowritings]

Manon And Her Babysitter (A Masc!Marinette Fic)

Manon being a Mood for 2393 words straight.

I have like 30 wip’s (not all Masc! Mari fics, I’m working on a new au and maybe even in a zine-fingers crossed) and school is starting for me so heads up if I don’t post much. Or post less than I did before. Writing is a stress reliever for me so you may notice a pattern when I post. 

This Masc! Mari (aka Marin Dupain Cheng) AU based off the lovely @daloochsdoodles and their art. Please check them out. 

Marin didn’t think that a girl with eyes the size of dinner plates would take such a liking to him. Asking him about his day or take her to parks when she visited.

Manon didn’t think that a headstrong teen would have so much patience with her. Even at her worst and crankiest moments in the day.  ——

Alya once told Marin that he intimated her when she first entered the school gates on her first day. His height and dark clothes just added to the anxiousness of the new school, new town, new people growing in her stomach. Alya felt smaller than the head on the tiniest pin needle or a mouse in a garden of starving foxes. Of course, Alya would never let anyone push her around but ideas like that just bubbled over in her mind. Yet the growing worry disappeared the moment Marin looked at her -and flashed a sunny smile.

However, to be fair, Alya later confessed that Marin could never be scary even if he tried. His warm aura, his soft pastel Jagged Stone sweatshirt, with his charming features was the total package of a fluffy boyfriend that anybody, whether their sexuality, would want to wrap their arms around. He’s a soft man. Even with his tall and strong build.

So at this instant, in his family’s living room, he didn’t know if his face looked like the soft friend Alya knew and loved or the intimating teenager that could cut diamond with a stare. His question was answered when the girl that hid behind her mother’s legs gave him a toothy smile. As toothy as she could make it with two of her front teeth missing.

Marin gave a gentle smile back, waving to her before he went back to his tablet. Annotating an article about the American Revolution for history class. Saving the key details in his head to use in the upcoming class debate while relating it back to the French Revolution. Clicking the screen with his stylus some more before his mom called him over.

“Honey, I want you to meet my friend, Nadja.” Sabine introduced, motioning him to show his good manners. Marin reluctantly slips out of his comfy position on the couch. Shaking Nadja’s hand while his mother continued.

“She used to come to the house all the time when you were little! It’s been years since I could remember you guys standing in the same room.”

“Your mother talks a lot about you-”

“Marin, but some people call me Mari.”

“AND I’M MANON CHAMACK!” The little girl yelled excitedly. Sniggering to herself when she got Marin’s attention. Proudly standing in front of her mother while her body rocked back and forth on the balls of her heels. Marin couldn’t help but share her infectious smile. Reminiscing when he was around Manon’s age. How he would try to get noticed by the older kids at school or in family reunions. Making himself seem like the coolest kid ever or just hovering over big kids before they bothered to include him in their games.

Nadja and Sabine smiled at each other, fighting the urge to laugh at Manon’s sudden introduction. Sabine quickly invited them in and out of the doorway. Nadja instinctively followed Sabine when her eyes lingered on her daughter. Praying that she wouldn’t cause too much of a ruckus for Marin.

Marin squatted down to meet Manon’s height.

“So what brings you here, Manon? Have any plans for the day?” He asked. Letting this kid be a healthy distraction from his report.

Manon swang her body side to side, taking in a breath before rambling. “Mom says that she plans to take me to the park if I’m SUPER good when she’s here with your mommy! Maybe even get a cookie from the bakery too!” Skipping her way in and passing Marin. Jumping a little higher as the thought of having a baked good made Manon’s mouth water.

“MAYBE I should even get a brownie! With sprinkles! Or maybe just a WHOLE cake with blue frosting!” Giggling to herself some more before her loud voice went over the list of treats she likes.

“Aren’t you rambunctious,” Marin sighed. Following Manon into the house (while she asked what rambunctious meant) before shutting the front door closed.

—-

“I have a friend with your name. At least it sounds like it.” Manon explained between her bites on her brownie. Still warm from his mother’s kitchen with hints of pinks and blues from the sprinkles Manon added. Crunching them under her tongue. Unintentionally making her mouth a light shade of purple.

“Yeah,” Marin answered. Holding Manon’s hand as he held the other with the animal balloon that he bought (*cough* with no influence from the baby doll eyes *cough*). “What’s their name?” He asked. Looking back and forth for any cars as they crossed the street.

“Maribelle. She’s pretty cool and foreign. Gave me half of her cookie so we’re friends now.” Manon nonchalantly said. Unaware that her friendship was bought, but from the looks of it, she didn’t mind too much about it. “Now that I think about it, Mari sounds like a girl name. Right?” The little girl said innocently.

“Yeah, it was in a way,” Marin replied easily, checking for incoming traffic until they reached the sidewalk. “But things change.” Giving Manon a smile which she returned after wiping the chocolate off the edges of her lips.

“You wanna go on the swings?”

“Last one there is a rotten egg!” Manon snickered. Running as fast as her legs could take her to the empty swing set. Leaving Marin in her dust.

——–

“PLEASSSEEE MARI!” Manon cried. Collapsing onto the ground and kicking her feet in the air. All as Marin stood firm on his promise with Nadja.

Don’t let her eat sweets after 7 pm.

“No.”

Earning him another anger huff from the little girl.

Nadja was off handling another story that needed to be scripted and filmed on the same day. Extremely unrealistic for someone to do, but Nadja was up for the challenge if it meant that she could have a full week off with her daughter. The exhausted, workaholic mother promised Marin that she would be back before 11 pm. However, he pushed back his tutoring session from tomorrow morning to tomorrow in the afternoon just in case she came in later than that.

Till Nadja arrived, Marin was ready to handle a cranky six-year-old for the next three+ hours.

Manon, now a cranky and sleepy six-year-old, stopped tossing and turning on the ground. Stretching out her arms and legs like a starfish in defeat. Closing her eyes and slowly opening them again.

“Tired?” Marin asked, placing his hands on his hips.

Manon nodded, lifting herself off the ground. “Can I have Unicorn Puffs for a snack now?”

“I’ll make you a fruit bowl with fresh strawberries and melon.” Marin reasoned. Recalling that Unicorn Puff Cereal was also a “no” in Nadja’s list.

“I can put that one chocolate drizzle you like on them though.” He sighed, lowering himself to Manon’s level.

The little girl shot up from the floor, her twin-tails bouncing with her quick nod. Gaining back her energy and beaming her toothy smile. Now complete thanks to her new front teeth.

“Deal.”

——–

“Look, Marin! It’s that one person from your magazines!” Manon wooed. Amazed that the model’s hair was as shiny in real life like it was in the glossy pages of Vogue. Wanting to feel it as she stepped towards them before getting pulled back.

“Oh my gosh, Manon! Look the merry-go-around is empty. You should totally go there!” Marin hissed, ignoring his friend/unicorn’s laughs. Pushing Manon towards the carousel. Away from the shiny person taking pictures from the fountain.

////

Manon choked on the sobs that threaten to come up her mouth. Her face felt hot like the time she threw up all the sugary goods that turned bitter in her stomach. However, this type of sick didn’t make Manon’s belly flip in pain, but her tiny heart beat faster and her palms lost their grip on Alya’s hand. She wanted her mommy to smoothen her nerves or Marin to pull her in one for his hugs. Wishing she could smell the fabric softer his mother buys on his sweater or hear her mom tell her that it would be okay in the end.

-But no matter how much Alya distracted her, Manon could only watch the ice around her grow thicker and thicker. Looking towards the outside was harder as the ice grew mistier. The firefighters outside tried to explain how they would get them out as if to calm them down but Manon couldn’t hear them and the ice made them look all distorted and ‘wriggly’.

“Lady Beetle and Chat Noir will save us. Right?”

Manon remembering back to the dolls Marin sewed of the heroes. How they sat on his shelves with a smile. Wondering if they would look that friendly when they pull people out of danger. Or if they really win every time when an Akuma comes and hurts Paris.

“Of course! They’re superheroes."Alya smiled. Pulling her face towards her. Grinning like everything was okay, even when it felt like it wasn’t. Rubbing circles on her back to keep her warm.

"They always save the day. We just have to trust them.”

////

Lady Beetle jumped from building to building before landing on the ice dome that shielded the merry-go-round from the summer heat. Showing no usual signs of melting.  Making him less surprised when he felt the toughness and chill of the temperature drop from the ice through his suit.

Lady Beetle doubted it would make a dent, but he still whipped his yo-yo around the ice capsule. In an attempt to crack it or even split the whole thing. The yo-yo didn’t do much like the firefighter’s axes. Huffing in frustration before seeing a little girl clapped her hands against the ice.

“Manon-”

“LADY BEETLE!” She cried out. Getting the woman behind her to do the same.

“Alya,” Lady Beetle whispered. Rushing over to them.

“LADY BEETLE!” Manon yelled again, softer than the last as LB got her level. He resisted the urge to tell Manon everything. That he’s sorry for leaving her for even a moment when he promised her to protect her. Sorry about ignoring her the whole day and pushing her aside for one of his complex plans on getting a date. Sorry for not stopping Stormy Weather from trapping them in a chilly container. Even apologizing that he didn’t buy the ice cream she wanted.

However, then would blow his identity.

Lady Beetle rolled his words in his mouth, having to settle for the “You will be okay, I’ll get you out” line. Swallowing his uncertainty as he heard Stormy Weather crackled her umbrella to form a hurricane in Chat Noir’s direction. Who tried their best to push Stormy away from the citizens.

Lady Beetle looped his yo-yo in his fingers. Ready to throw it before Manon called out to him.

“I trust you.” ��

—

Marin hurried before the reporters could mog him for an interview or bumble questions about the Akuma attack today.  Chat Noir left before their miraculous give out and Marin just needs to see if Manon and Alya were okay. The Miraculous cure would have healed them if anything happened yet that didn’t make Marin feel any better though when he reached the park and they weren’t there.

“MANON! ALYA!”

He called, running around for a bit. Knocking into someone, promptly saying sorry before spinning his head around to find his friends. His lungs drew sharps breaths the more he ran. Stopping when he heard a small shout calling his name.

“MARI!”

“Manon! Alya!”

Rushing into Manon’s hug. Glad to see her again and even better to feel that being trapped in a chilly ice dome for an hour didn’t give her a fever.   Manon’s little hands pulled on Marin’s face, making him face her big, goofy grin. Alya behind her having the same one plastered on her face, only to punch Marin’s arm and scold him for scaring them shitless when he disappeared when the Akuma nearly froze all of Paris.

“YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE WHO WE SAW TODAY!”

“Wh-”

“LADY BEETLE!” Manon screamed. Almost making Marin drop her from the shock of her roar. From there Manon continued to gush about the red hero. How they tried to get them out and then promised to beat the Akuma to save them.  How high they could jump, making it seem that they could fly over buildings. How Chat Noir and Lady Beetle worked together to save the day. Plus how cool Chat Noir looked when saying “Cataclysm”.  How the magic ladybugs fixed everything for good and how-

“I’m just glad you’re okay, Manon.” Marin sighed. Chuckling as Manon tried to mimicking Lady Beetle calling on their Lucky Charm.  Alya stole Marin’s attention while she happily flipped through the photos of the Akuma to post on the Ladyblog. Mentioning how some filters were needed to make the picture clearer. Even catching a video of the magical ladybug effortlessly fixing buildings and basically 'curing’ all the victims that got swept up in Stormy Weather’s scheme.

Marin was just relieved that everyone was fine and well as people gawked at the aftermath of Lady Beetle’s damage-control or how the girl with the once cursed umbrella now happily smiles on TV announcing that the weather channel will now have two hosts.

——— All as a certain black cat sprang down to an alley. Dropping the magical transformation and swiftly returning to their life. Slipping their way back into the park where a restless and provocative photographer sat and a large gorilla- uh, I mean bodyguard searched for him. Leaving the small piece of freedom they have behind to return to their civilian life. Not before knocking into someone that looked too familiar to just be a stranger.

[annakie]

An Annotated Mass Effect Playthrough, Part Five

Will we make it off the Citadel in this update??

List of Posts: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Flux is my favorite bar in all of the first game, I know there’s not many to choose from, but I like the music best, everybody’s clothed, everyone’s having a good time, there’s slots upstairs for entertainment, there’s dancing, and plenty of space to chill out in.  Also the color scheme is great.  It looks particularly great now with the graphics mod improvements.  

Doran gets a nice glamour shot here.

I’m a tattle tale who always turns this guy in.  I agree with Kaidan...

Also I really love Rita’s quest with her sister.  She loves her sister, Jenna  wants to be helpful, even Doran’s like “Hey I’d love to give her her job back.”  Everyone here is pretty wholesome.  And Jenna gets one of the best surprise appearances in ME3 if you do things right.  ME1Recalibrated fixes the bugs with her quest, too!

Speaking of bugged quests, Hello Conrad!  ME1Recalibrated fixes Conrad’s bug, and even if it doesn’t, ME2Re does.  The only bad thing about that is it makes his apology for accusing you of something you maybe didn’t do make no sense.

Everyone else was sure Conrad would turn out to be evil, too, right? Instead making him into just a big lying dummy with an advanced degree was a great move.  I was kinda hoping he’d show up in the Citadel DLC.   

Harkin is JUST the FUCKING WORST.  I’m always tempted to let Garrus cap him in ME2 because what a waste of air he is and doesn’t learn his lesson.  

This is also maybe the most overt place where FemShep experiences sexism.  I mean, don’t get me wrong, there’s some pretty shitty sexism sprinkled throughout the games (as discussed a bit last post) but ugh this guy, if I could shoot him this game, I might.  At least on renegade playthroughs.

Speaking of Garrus...

Finally, an alien who wants to hang out with us.

As primarily a Kaidan-romancing gal, who tends to keep up with the Kaidan Alenko tag, especially back in the heyday of tumblr, for a while, loving Garrus was... difficult.

In October, when I was finishing up my latest ME3 playthrough and also cleaning up my blog, and also rewatching Doctor Who and thinking a lot about Rose Tyler and Martha Jones, I posted a long thing in a post about Kaidan and Garrus and badly behaving fanbases, which I don’t feel like typing again.  Here’s the whole thing, but I’m going to pull a part of it into here.

I love Garrus, so much.  And I was thinking with this whole parallel DW rewatch / Mass Effect replay think I’m doing right now how both Rose Tyler and Garrus Vakaraian are characters that were ruined for me for awhile due to their respective… overly enthusiastic fanbases who a small percentage of were dicks to people who loved other characters.  The Kaidan tag (and from what I understand Thane got some of this too, but not nearly as bad) was a pretty hostile place for awhile (and yeah I used to regularly check the Garrus tag too and there was a small amount of tag-invasion there but uh, like 5% of what the Kaidan tag got) which made loving the character of Garrus a lot harder for awhile.  But when actually watching seasons 1 & 2 / the end of 4 of Doctor Who, or actually playing the ME games, those characters are awesome.  

Fanbases can be amazing or terrible, and time and time again I think you start to realize that no matter how great a fandom is, there are going to be a few people who can only enjoy themselves by feeding on drama, or on lifting up what they love by stomping on other people/characters/plotlines.  

It’s not fair to characterize everyone who loves a popular thing as someone who does this.  It’s also hard to avoid completely because there will always be jerks, or young/new people who don’t realize what bad form they’re showing.  I did learn by trying to fight it for a year or two, that responding might help that one person not do it again, but it’s not going to stop overall.  

Anyway, don’t be a dick about the things you don’t like.  

It’s sad that even thirteen years past the release of ME1 and eight years past ME3 some people still need to have this fight online.   It’s basically impossible to enjoy like, any non-curated Mass Effect space online because of pissing contests or people spouting the same boring opinions.  Which they’re entitled to.  I’m just real tired of “Kaidan is boring!” “Ashley is a racist!” etc with no further depth of thought being given.

The ability to mute / block people and get away from the worst of it is one of the reasons I’m still on tumblr.  Especially always mute/block “confessions” blogs.  Yeesh.

---------

I’m glad Garrus is here, and I’m glad he’s on the team.  What’s funny though, is that people tend to forget that Garrus like, wasn’t really all THAT popular of a character before ME2.  I know I was only in the fandom for a year before ME2 but I dug in pretty deep in that time.

It wasn’t until he gets his face blown off and starts talking about Old Times that a lot of people started to REALLY like him.  He’s still great in ME1, but not like, elevated to god-tier that so many people did post ME2 release.  But in ME1 he IS neat because he’s really malleable.  Probably the companion who can have the biggest personality shift depending on your choices.

Also, I remember a time when the people who wanted to romance Garrus were like... outliers?  I remember thinking “GARRUS?  As a romance?  That’s... weird.  Who would do that!?”

OH HOW I WAS WRONG.  But that was before reach and flexibility.

Hey I even have a Shep that romanced Garrus in ME2 and ME3.  And I loved it!

Were I to replay a different Shep, she’d be my first choice.

So yeah, I love Garrus, I keep Kaidan in the squad all the time in ME1 and the other spot I try to rotate everyone else somewhat evenly, but you’ll see plenty of him.  Then ME2 he’s by my side most of the way.  And an awful lot in ME3, too.  But I’m happy for him to get crushed on by Dr. Michele and glad to see him and Tali find happiness in ME3.  SO that’s the path we’ll be going down if we get that far here.

I love the Destiny Ascension flyby moment on the Citadel, and it’s so easy to miss.  Also really hard to get good screenshots of.  Thanks Flycam.  Don’t pay attention to the untextured wall in the first pic, just look at the pretty lights!

Let’s go get another squadmate!  This time, a not-as-initially-friendly alien!

What an amazing entrance for Urdnot Wrex.

“Do you want me to arrest you?”

“I want you to try!”

Hell.  Yeah.

Here’s where the somewhat in somewhat evenly comes in.  I probably do favor Wrex and Ashely in the squad in ME1 a little because... well you know what’s coming for Ash and Wrex you get the least amount of time with by far of the other companions.  Also, he’s just... great?  A tank, with some biotics and a shotgun... okay well so am I as a vanguard, but Kaidan has just enough tech powers for us to muddle through where we need to when Wrex is in the squad and he’s so much fun to have around.  His “Fuck you, I don’t care” attitude is great, and his growth story throughout the trilogy is one of the best arcs a character gets, imho.  I just really love Urdnot Wrex.

This is a real nice flight control office you’ve got here, C-Sec.  It would be a shame if someone planted a bug in it later, since literally anyone can just walk on up here uncontested.

This entire area really is so pretty though.

I always pump points into Paragon as much as possible from as early on as possible, and saving these poor guys’ lives is one of the big reasons.  They don’t need to die.

Ash usually still stays in the party up to this point, though sometimes it’s Garrus.  Fist is still a dick in ME2 but he doesn’t need to die here, sorry Wrex.

...raise your hand if you still occasionally forget to pick up Emily Wong’s evidence and have to reload.  I remembered!  ...once I was almost out of Chora’s Den and had to turn around this time.

Kaidan?  Kaidan my love?  My darling... perhaps YOU shouldn’t be the one standing in the middle of the corridor with no barrier or protection?  (I suppose I could scooch over but then I’d look less badass for these screenshots.  Naaah.)

It’d be a shame if someone properly lit the corridor so we could see what’s going on.

But hey... TALI!  Tali Tali Tali!  The first quarian we see, and only one for... awhile?  Is there another quarian in this entire game? I’m trying to remember and seriously can’t think of one.

Anyway, I love Tali, but another character you really need to ignore their most rabid fanbase portions of.  Yikes, Talimancers were really something back in the day.  The biggest problem I have with Tali being in the squad is that normally she’s REALLY useful against Geth and... not so much against just about anything else.  She gets sidelined on my team more than I wish she would.  Especially since she doesn’t show up until very late in ME2 and late-midway through ME3.

Finally, the proof we need.  And the game continues to introduce new concepts to us with the Conduit and we hear the word Reapers for the first time.  We also get a loredump on the quarians and the geth.  

Tali’s voice doesn’t have quite as heavy of an accent in ME1 as it does in 2 and 3.  I guess we can assume she’s lost part of it while on her pilgrimage?  Picking up the local dialects a bit?  The next two times we see her she’s just spent a lot of time with her own people.

Tali’s suit and omnitool look SO GOOD with the updated textures.

I swap Ash out and Tali in at this point, and usually finish up a few more quests along the way.

Ah, Septimus.  You lovesick fool.

Honestly, the very best thing with Septimus is to bring Garrus here if you’re gonna romance him, have Garrus laugh at him for coming undone for love and then... well, ME2 and especially ME3 happen.  But still.  Septimus... always needs a kick in the pants but will get around to doing the right thing.

Hey here’s a cool thing ME1Recalibated does -- Morlan carries a Squad Iconic Armors stock, so you can always find tier-appropriate default look armor for you and all the squad.  Very cool of you, Morlan.  You are currently my favorite store on the Citadel.  Now stop sending me spam, I didn’t sign up for your mailing list.

Look, I have questions about what exactly Xeltan told the consort and how... all that... works... but... I don’t think I actually want to ask them.  Just.. let’s all shut up about all of it, it’s over now.

BTW, according to one of the novels, Councilor Anderson finds Ambassador Cayln super annoying.  I need to re-read that book.

OK fine... I’ll go talk to the Council.

Coming at ya with Actual Proof and a quarian tagging along to back up the claims, the Council is ready to listen.  And while not surprising that it’s finally time to become a Spectre, the actual ceremony is really well done.  With the swelling theme music blaring, and all three councilors stressing what a big deal this is and what will be expected of you, you really feel the weight of this moment.  People take notice.  Although apparently later, Kaidan or Ash get an entire televised event around becoming a Spectre, I guess there’s no time for that right now.

It definitely feels like the game so far has been building towards this moment, not only with POUNDING it into your brain about who Spectres are and why they’re so important and letting you know you’re being evaluated... but it feels like there’s been a shift in the game after this moment.  It’s A Big Deal.

I didn’t finish all the sidequests on the Citadel yet, they can wait, I’ve been here long enough.  Let’s go check out the new cool stuff we can buy.

ME1Recalibrated adds in this Spectre Armor.  Eeehhhhh... no thanks.  We’ll stick with Onyx.

I did cheat myself in a bunch of credits and picked up Spectre weapons though. This ain’t no tryhard playthrough.  

Well OK, we can finish ONE more quest.  Thanks, startlingly loud and triumphant music queue that’s never used again!

Man, this would be SUCH a good pic of the Normandy if... the airlock didn’t go straight through the ship.

We’ve got a ship of our own!  And most of our squadmates to put on it!

Sucks for Anderson to be sidelined, though.  We already love you, Anderson!

It’s cool to get a bit more of the Saren & Anderson backstory here for real.  Still, I enjoyed the book more.  Maybe I’ll do a re-read of all the ME books here soon.

Udina... just keep being you, I guess.  

WE HAVE A SHIP!!!

Okay, whew... we made it off the Citadel.  Now I gotta actually play some more to have more updates to post.  Might be a few days.  Have to actually go back to work tomorrow. :p

Let’s probably do like one sidequest then go get us an Asari!!

[anthonybrxdgerton]

A Discovery of Witches reread

Last week I re-read A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness and it took me a long time to do it; I had to pause every few pages (sometimes paragraphs) because of the choices characters made I didn’t agree with. I will be doing my reactions about episodes as well (as soon as I re-watch them) and comparing the show to the first book.

My reactions, notes and everything under the cut. There are some trivia I forgot about, some minor changes book vs tv show, some stuff referencing the next books and what not. 

BEWARE OF SPOILERS FOR THE BOOKS. IF YOU HAVEN’T READ THE BOOKS, DON’T READ THIS POST. Enjoy!

[ a discovery of witches | shadow of night | the book of life | time’s convert ]

the book takes place in 2009 in the span of 40 days

miriam and marcus have very different taste in music (The whole area seemed unoccupied, although from somewhere there came faint strains of a Bach cello concerto and something that sounded an awful lot like the latest hit recorded by the Eurovision song-contest winners);

marcus wears converse and he's BLOND (so are nathaniel and satu); 

the killings that occurred at the time (a.k.a jack’s doing) were the reason matthew thought that vampires are going extinct and are not able to sire anyone else;

Patience, alas, was not the strong suit of Bishop women - you can clearly see that in the books as well as in the show;

sarah and rebecca's mother's name is joanna  (which only matters to me because it’s my name too);

matthew came to oxford at 1989 (when he met hamish); 

matthew was 37 eyars old when we was re-born as a vampire and baldwin was in his late twenties or early thirties. marcus was in his late twenties and diana is 33.

marcus is into red-heads (but phoebe is not a red-head, which will be notet later by baldwin or matthew (i don’t remember which)) ;

"I asked if you were hungry.” Why he continued to do so was a mystery—when was I not hungry? #relatable, I’m Diana here;

“I love your hair,” he murmured. “It has every color imaginable—even strands of red and black.” which will be important later on when diana’s hair change

matthew knows how to knock the cork off with a sword (and now i feel robbed that we didn't see it)

both matthew and hamish won all souls prize fellowship

"What’s your name?” I asked, smothering a smile. “Timothy,” he answered, rocking back on his heels. He was wearing mismatched cowboy boots, one red and one black. His eyes were mismatched, too—one was blue and one was green. “You’re more than welcome to check your e-mail, Timothy.” “You’re the one.” He tipped his fingers at me, pivoted on the heel of the red boot, and walked away. - i just love Timothy, okay? He’s a sweetheart PLUS he is somewhat important in The Book of Life

ashmole 782 has been missing since 1859 but gerbert had it a thousand years ago and “it is a strange book, is it not, Diana? A thousand years ago I took it from a great wizard from Toledo. When I brought it to France, it was already bound by layers of enchantment."

diana's fingers were already colorful (mostly blue) especially when she was angry/stressed 

Somewhere in the center of my soul, a rusty chain began to unwind. It freed itself, link by link, from where it had rested unobserved, waiting for him. My hands, which had been balled up and pressed against his chest, unfurled with it. The chain continued to drop, to an unfathomable depth where there was nothing but darkness and Matthew. At last it snapped to its full length, anchoring me to a vampire. -  matthew could feel the chain if diana wanted him too. I think she weaved it subconsciously without realizing she’s using her weaver’s powers at the time

Matthew also knew his faults, anger chief among them. Typically, Matthew’s rage was so destructive that once the poison was out of his system, he disappeared for months or even years to come to terms with what he'd done - first reference to the blood rage 

matthew used to be friends with marquis de lafayette 

when marcus was dying and matthew told him about vampires, marcus thought he was tormented by a demon 

“Holy God,” Marcus said softly. Staring at the picture, he tried to imagine what it would be like to receive a photo of his own father ripped to pieces and tossed into the dirt to die. - a.k.a. WAIT TILL SHADOW OF NIGHT AND NOW I'M CRYING I JUST LOVE MATTHEW AND MARCUS’ RELATIONSHIP SO MUCH OKAY

Matthew wore his pilgrim’s badge only when he was afraid he was going to kill someone or when he was thinking of Eleanor St. Leger—or both. - i wish they kept it in the show too especially since it created the tree of life in bishop’s house

My aunt was good with spells. Emily wasn’t but could fly for short distances and see the future.

 Matthew’s books were arranged not by size but in a running time line. Those on the first bookshelf were so ancient that I couldn’t bear to think about what they contained—the lost works of Aristotle, perhaps? Anything was possible. - headcanon that he has books from a Library of Alexandria (maybe he got them from Philippe or Hugh or Godfrey?) 

“It was spring, you were bored, and so you got up one morning and went to Italy to make war. Your father had to beg forgiveness from the king on his knees”. now I NEED TO KNOW WHAT MATTHEW HAS DONE 

“Perhaps, but one thing hasn’t changed in all these years. Whenever there’s a crisis, there’s a de Clermont nearby.” - it should be their motto, really

diana has visions too - i know it's obvious but i completely forgot about it since the show didn’t include it at all except for episode 7 when everybody saw the past 

Matthew was unusually tall for the time, though not as tall as he became once he was a vampire - being reborn as a vampire not only makes you stronger but bigger and taller too.

His mother strode forward and slapped him, hard, across the face. “How dare you ask that question?” i need to see it, WHY DIDN’T YOU INCLUDE THIS, SHOW?

 marcus is "good at wheedling information out of people."

“And you are going to give me gray hairs—long thought impossible among vampires, by the way—with your courage, your firecracker hands, and the impossible things you say.” -  i just like it and i wonder if deb already knew that diana would do that for him in the book of life?

Baldwin had him by the throat before the words were out of his mouth. Their heads close together, one dark and one bright, they rocketed to the far end of the hall. Matthew’s body smashed into a wooden door, splintering it with the impact. - friendly reminder that Baldwin is a much better fighter than Matthew and the show SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF MAKING HIM WEAKER

Vampires didn’t usually get all of their names (5) when they were reborn but over the years.

One reason the de Clermont family was so long-lived was that each member had different skills in a crisis. Philippe had always been the leader of men, a charismatic figure who could convince vampires and humans and sometimes even daemons to fight for a common cause. Their brother Hugh had been the negotiator, bringing warring sides to the bargaining table and resolving even the fiercest of conflicts. Godfrey, the youngest of Philippe’s three sons, had been their conscience, teasing out the ethical implications of every decision. To Baldwin fell the battle strategies, his sharp mind quick to analyze every plan for flaws and weaknesses. Louisa had been useful as bait or as a spy, depending on the situation. Matthew, improbably enough, had been the family’s fiercest warrior. His early adventures with the sword had made his father wild with their lack of discipline, but he’d changed. Now whenever Matthew held a weapon in his hand, something in him went cold and he fought his way through obstacles with a tenacity that made him unbeatable. Then there was Ysabeau. Everyone underestimated her except for Philippe, who had called her either “the general” or “my secret weapon.” She missed nothing and had a longer memory than Mnemosyne. - i really like it and i wish it was in the show too. That being said I really am interested what are the talents/skills of Verin, Stasia and Freya.

A helicopter,” Baldwin said. “It was waiting in Clermont-Ferrand to take me back to Lyon. - does Baldwin have a house there? 

”Fancy seeing you here, Miss Bishop”. It was what he always said when I sneaked into his study at home or crept downstairs late at night for one more bedtime story. FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT STEPHEN TOLD HER THE SAME THING IN LONDON TOO

Let me know if you need anything, Ysabeau.” Baldwin brushed her cheeks with his lips. - WERE THEY ENEMIES? FRENEMIES?? I THOUGH THAT HATED EACH OTHER WHAT IS GOING ON I NEED ANSWERS ESPECIALLY THAT YSABEAU SAID SHE HATES HIM IN BOL AND THAT HE TRIED TO BANISH HER FROM JERUSALEM ONCE

Marcus was Matthew’s son. He was my son. / When the door swung open, Marcus’s blue eyes met mine with a twinkle. “Hi, Mom, we’re home!” I JUST LOVE IT, OKAY, WE NEED MORE OF THEM IN THE SHOW

Marcus prefers whiskey even though all of his family loves wine

One morning Marcus turned on his heel and stormed back to the house, leaving his father alone in the old apple orchard. “Diana,” he growled in greeting before streaking through the family room and straight out the front door. “I’m too damn young for this!” he shouted as he left. - I LOVE YOU MY BABY DRAMA QUEEN

Gerbert had always wanted to be included among the Knights of Lazarus, and my father refused him time and time again. - which is why he sent Juliette to spy on Matthew and it gives interesting layer that he told about The Knights in the show. He’s so bitter loool

Stephen Proctor could timewalk into the past OR into the future hence why we saw him in the 1x01 - he wasn’t just a hallucination, he probably timewalked into the future to make sure Ashmole 782 is safe

also, at the end of the book, right before they timewalked, Matthew noticed that there are some annotations in his “Doctor Faustus” copy he made that he didn’t remember putting them there. - is this a sign that 16th century Matthew somehow subconsciously remembered Diana or his fight with Kit or something? I wish that was explained too because that’s interesting.

this is so long I’M SORRY. Overall, I had very hard time re-reading this book especially when Matthew was so possessive and controlling. I wanted to punch him every time he said or did something. Show!Matthew is definitely more bearable and les creepy. Also, I love the familiar/platonic relationships between Marcus & Matthew, Marcus & Diana, Marcus & Miriam, Miriam & Diana, Sophie & Diana, Sarah & Marcus and more. Too bad the show didn’t care about those relationships too much. As for the romantic relationships, I wish I knew more about Miriam & Bertrand, Philippe & Ysabeau, Sophie & Nathaniel too.

[quarterfromcanon]

Breathless

Heather & Valencia - Femslash February - Day 19 - Rosé  [3,673 words]

They were nearly finished with their first glasses when Valencia circled to the topic of the wedding preparations that took over Heather’s house.

“So how's it going?” 

“All over the place. And also nowhere. It’s an avalanche of crap. There’s rare proof of results. I’m kinda worried about her.” Heather swirled the rosé and watched it settle back into stillness. “The venue’s hella pretty so I get wanting to have it there, but like, I’m reasonably sure moving things up this soon is a bad idea in all caps.”

“What she needs is a guidebook,” Valencia declared. “I had an entire binder.”

“Rebecca’s latest reference is some D.I.Y. wedding from Canada.” Heather polished off the remainder of her drink.

Valencia scoffed in dismissal. “Even those require more work than people realize.” 

“That’s what I said!”

“Plus, if the user who posted isn’t from anywhere near your hometown, then you can’t count on their resources to be applicable to you,” Valencia expounded. “Hell, if they’re from another country then I’m sure it’s even worse. They’ll have access to different shops and venues, not to mention the help of their families and friends. You can’t copy and paste their circumstances. It won’t come out the same. Guaranteed.”

“You gave all that a lot of thought,” Heather remarked.

“After a decade and a half with Josh, it was way more than thought. I had every piece in place except for the groom.” Valencia downed her wine and set it on a coaster. She shrugged. “Turns out, he didn’t paste so well, either. I still have the binder, though.”

“Really? You didn’t, like, burn it or throw it in the dumpster so you wouldn’t have to look at it again?”

“I was tempted,” Valencia conceded. “My hand was literally over the trash more than once, but I always kept myself from dropping the book. I did a lot of work rounding all that up, damn it. Why waste years of effort and attention to detail? Something useful ought to come out of what I went through. He could change my reality, but I didn’t want to let him take my dreams.”

“Good for you.” Heather raised her empty glass in approval.

“Can I show you everything?”

Heather freed her hands and adjusted her cardigan. “What’s that?”

“The binder,” Valencia clarified. “It’s still in my bedroom. Would you mind looking through it with me?”

Heather’s pulse quickened. The subject matter and the woman who wanted to discuss it struck her as a dangerous combination in light of recent overnight scenes from her subconscious. This was exactly what almost convinced her not to knock on Valencia’s door, but there was no retreat now. She could see how badly Valencia wanted to share what she had made. Heather didn’t have the will to deny her that wish. She traced the stem of the wine glass. “Yeah, we can do that. I’m game.”

Valencia disappeared through the open doorway. Heather accompanied her but stopped near the threshold. Valencia was already on her hands and knees beside the bed, rummaging underneath it. She faced opposite from the door and Heather was momentarily transfixed by the curve of her friend’s jeans. 

She averted her gaze, but the places it landed after that were not especially helpful distractions. Valencia’s mattress looked comfortable and warm in the patch of sunlight pouring through the shades. The picture they took together on Labor Day was at the edge of Valencia’s nightstand. Its presence made Heather’s heart skip a beat. She raced through a surprising number of thoughts in the span of seconds -- why that particular photo received a place of honor, why it was kept within view of where Valencia slept, what she might think or feel while looking at it -- but then Valencia’s words interrupted Heather’s reverie.

“Sorry,” Valencia apologized with a grunt. “It went too far last time. I shoved it against the wall.”

Heather blinked a very different mental picture from her mind and focused on the out-of-reach binder. “Do you want some help?”

“Yeah, go for it.” Valencia moved out of the way. She gestured for Heather to give it her best shot.

Heather joined Valencia on the floor and dropped onto her stomach. She crawled under the bed with her head tilted to the side and tried to extend her arm far enough to catch the spine of the binder between her fingers. Her duster caught on the metal of the frame. She had to pry herself from its clutches. Heather exhaled her vexation. “Hang on.”

She scooted in reverse, shed the cardigan, then resumed her pursuit of the elusive item.

“Almost... got it...”

“Girl, your entire back is out right now.”

Heather paused and realized she could feel the air of the room against a rather significant amount of skin. “I’ll get it in a minute.”

“It’s all right. I can fix that for you,” Valencia offered.

“I’ll be done in like two se--”

Heather’s eyes widened as Valencia’s fingers curled beside her rib cage to slide the shirt down where it belonged. When Valencia’s knuckles brushed her waist, Heather twitched involuntarily and bashed her ear against the underside of the bed. She hissed with a wince. 

“Shit.”

“Are you okay?”

Heather pressed her palm against the injured side of her head. “Yeah, I’m fine. I think I just figured something out, though.”

“What?”

Heather reemerged. She flipped to a seated position. “I’ve been coming at this from the wrong direction.” She propped herself up with her hands flat against the floor and put her legs under the mattress. Heather inched forward to gingerly search with the toes of her boots until they tapped against the binder. “Uh-huh. This’ll do the trick. Wait for it.”

Her shirt crept up her stomach as she strained to gain purchase. She couldn’t be certain because it was so fleeting, but Heather thought she saw Valencia’s gaze linger over her abs.

“Got it!” she announced. “So, now I’m just gonna...”

Heather crab-walked with the binder between her feet and finally brought it out of the shadows.

“Yay!” Valencia clapped. She hefted the tome into her arms. THE WEDDING BOOK was emblazoned across the front. She sat beside Heather and they leaned against the wall next to her closet. “Are you ready for this?”

Heather patted her thighs. “Put it here.”

They shared the weight of the book, half across Heather’s leg and the other on Valencia’s.

“Wow, it’s really heavy.” Heather lifted and lowered her kneecaps several times. “I could get a good workout with this. You weren’t kidding about having everything. I think you might be, like, the Tolstoy of wedding planners. That’s how many pages this thing has.”

Valencia laughed. “Well, I do like to be thorough.”

Heather licked her lips. She broke eye contact to look down at the first sheet. “Oh my god. Is that a table of contents? Wait, wait. Let me check the back. Yep, there’s an index, too. It’s a legit numbered and annotated book.”

Valencia elbowed her. She arched an eyebrow. “Are you finished commenting on my formatting?”

Heather hid a smile. “Take it away, Tolkien.”

Valencia rolled her eyes but her lips turned slightly at the corners. “So, the first few scans are actually before wedding prep begins. Layouts for engagement announcements, good locations for the accompanying photo shoot, recommended nearby photographers with their contact information, outfit inspo, and so on.”

Heather nodded and tried to concentrate on the assembled elements, but she was repeatedly drawn back to the person who had put it all together. Valencia spoke with obvious authority on the event. Bright enthusiasm came through in her voice. Her hands slid lovingly over every accumulated image and article of information. Heather herself had never so much as considered a style of dress, so she admittedly could not relate to the extensive construction of the fantasy. She hadn’t ruminated on post-nuptial domesticity, either, unless she counted the fictional scenario from her sleep that night during the Santa Ana winds (which she had been actively blocking out of her memory ever since). All that considered, however, the longing behind Valencia’s features caused a sympathetic pang in Heather just the same. 

Even though Valencia was over Josh, the fact remained that she wanted this. The gown, the veil, the ceremony and tradition of it, the gathering of loved ones, a devoted partner to share her life with -- it all brought her such audible and visible joy to imagine. Heather frowned. As they neared the end of the binder, she leaned her head against Valencia’s shoulder. The statement got caught in her mouth, slamming against deliberate resistance and uncertain implications, but the truth was more important than her insecurity. “I really hope you get your dream someday, V.” 

Valencia rested her cheek against Heather’s hair. “Thank you.” They remained that way for a brief while. Then Valencia closed the book with a resigned sigh. “Now that I’m looking at it with a new perspective, I think I’d probably scrap most of this. The vendor cards can stay, but the rest of it? Too much was for someone who’s not a factor anymore. Josh’s parents, his friends, his sisters... I knew they’d all be there determined to hate me, so the reception was where I was hoping to turn things around. It probably wouldn’t change their opinions much, but at least they’d be having a good time and not glaring from their tables. They’d end the night with fond memories, if nothing else. I’ll admit, the wedding itself was mostly for me, but you know what? I’m not a factor anymore, either. Or, at least, who I used to be isn’t. I’m... different. But maybe that’s not so bad.”

She looked down at Heather, who lifted her head and froze when they locked eyes. Valencia studied her vulnerable expression and became suddenly apologetic.

“I’m sorry. I completely dampened the mood. I was supposed to be helping you get away from weddings, not bringing them to you. Can I get you more wine?”

Heather concealed her disappointment with a forced smile. “Sure. That sounds great.”

“Awesome. Come on.” Valencia departed in the direction of their abandoned glasses. Heather uncomfortably shifted to cross her thighs. She took a deep breath and stood to follow her host. Though it happened without a conscious decision, Heather’s head turned for a parting glance at the bed before she left the room. She internally berated herself for that.

___

“Your ear is bleeding.”

“Huh?”

“Right there.” 

Valencia tried to point but her depth perception was no longer trustworthy. Her finger sank deep into Heather’s curls.

Heather snickered. “Missed.”

Valencia snorted. “Yeah, a little bit. It really is bloody, though, but like... dry.”

“Probably from your bed.” Heather took another drink.

“Aww! Is that what happened? Well, let me at least get some Neosporin for that.” Valencia shuffled toward the bathroom.

“Dude, you can’t even poke my ear right. How are you gonna put medicine on it?”

“Very carefully.”

They giggled. Heather leaned against the counter while she awaited her companion’s return. Valencia came back a couple of minutes later with an excessive dollop of the ointment on one fingertip and a circular bandage on the other. 

“Okay. This is going to be interesting. Don’t move.”

Heather swept her hair aside before she complied. Valencia rested the edge of her palm against Heather’s cheekbone to keep it steady. Her eyes squinted in concentration. A pink hint of tongue stuck out the corner of her mouth. Heather’s shoulders began to shake with suppressed laughter. Valencia gave her a teasing shove with the other hand. 

“That counts as moving.”

Heather tried without success to look serious. “Sorry.”

Valencia shifted her palm in a motion reminiscent of the hand on a clock, advancing by degrees, until at last her finger came into contact with the area of injury. “Hah! Nailed it.”

“Cool. I’ve gotta say, though, I’m not at all optimistic about that bandage.” Heather cast a wary glance at the plastic.

“Yeah, me either,” Valencia agreed. “Wish me luck.”

“You? I’m the one who’s gonna end up with adhesive in my hair.”

“Fair point. Good luck to you, too.”

“Comforting. I feel so much better about letting you do this.”

Valencia’s brows drew together. “Shh... You’re distracting the healer and she’s got a very important job to do. This is life or death stuff.”

Heather pantomimed zipping her lips.

“That’s better.”

It took several attempts including a couple of near-accidents involving stray strands, but then Valencia cupped Heather’s ear with both her hands and somehow managed to fold the bandage across the top.

“Ta-da!”

“Brilliant work, doc.” Heather plucked a sunflower out of the vase on the counter. She passed it to Valencia. “Job well done.”

Valencia blushed. She accepted the flower and put it immediately back in the water with the rest. “I’m very respected in my field.”

Heather inclined her head solemnly. They lapsed into silence, but then Heather tapped both hands against her denim shorts. “I should probably go home. I can’t avoid it forever.”

“You’re not going to drive, are you?”

“No, no. I walked. I’ll just head back the same way.” Heather ducked into Valencia’s bedroom to retrieve her cardigan off the floor.

“By yourself?”

“That’s how I traveled, yeah.” Heather clumsily shoved her arms into the sleeves.

“Not this time. I’m going with you.”

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely. Let me get my jacket.” Valencia grabbed the article of clothing in question and, with some difficulty, added it to her ensemble. She pocketed the key ring and tapped her fingers against her sides. “Off we go.”

___

Valencia wasn’t sure at what point during their stroll Heather talked her into taking the long way around or why she agreed to it, but eventually she realized they were in a part of West Covina she didn’t typically frequent.

“Where are we right now?”

“Getting close to my homework spot.” Heather walked up to a sign and pointed. “The Municipal Park.” They rounded the curve of the sidewalk. Heather gaped in amazement. “V, look! It’s empty. This never happens in the middle of the day.”

She walked across the vacant earth in long strides. Valencia followed at a distance. “Where are you going?”

“On a nostalgia trip. C’mon.” Heather approached the jungle gym.

“What does that even mean?” Valencia watched while Heather reached overhead to grasp the first beam of the monkey bars. “Are you sure this thing is made for adults?”

“Technically, no, but the metal portions will still support my weight.” Heather bent her legs at the knees to verify. “And I am gonna make good use of that sturdiness.”

She shucked her outermost garment again, but tied the sleeves around herself to keep track of it. Valencia stepped back so she had room to move. The crossing was more complicated since Heather could not easily judge the span of each transition, but her arms seemed up to the challenge of bearing her body aloft for a longer stretch of time. Valencia watched Heather’s biceps shift beneath her skin before she had to suppress a shiver.

Heather misjudged the next switch and whacked her knuckles against the bar. “Ah, fuck, that hit a vein.” She dropped lightly to the ground. “What did you do on the playground when you were little?”

Valencia counted activities on her fingers as she tried to remember. “Jump rope, hopscotch, four square... Oh, and one year our classroom got a couple of Skip-Its. The teacher had to schedule out turns to prevent fistfights.”

Heather’s eyes widened. “Oh my god, Skip-Its. I completely forgot about those things. So fun, but the counter hitting your ankle hurt like hell.”

Valencia nodded and chuckled. “So many bruises.”

“What about the stuff they’ve got here?” Heather prompted. “What would kid Valencia have ended up doing in this park?”

Valencia noticed the ladder to the lookout. “Well, I used to hang upside down sometimes. My legs were always stronger than my arms.”

“Do it.”

Valencia headed toward the bars without further consideration. “This is a terrible idea. You are a bad influence.”

“When I’ve been indulging in substances? Sometimes. But I’m a good spotter. I’ll stand directly in front of you. Try it.” Heather planted her feet firmly and waited.

Valencia ascended a few rungs, locked her calves across the other side, and started to lean backward. “Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no.” They both winced as she uncurled her spine with great caution, but then her back straightened and she dangled vertically above the ground. “Wait. Nope, nope, nope. The world’s not supposed to start moving without me. Catch!”

Heather flinched when Valencia’s legs kicked past her face, but she dove forward quickly enough to secure a supporting grip against Valencia’s middle. Valencia felt Heather’s fingers graze just below her chest and her stomach clenched. She adjusted her jacket and cleared her throat, but she couldn’t step away from the embrace until the vertigo subsided. “Thanks,” she murmured once her surroundings returned to normal.

“Told you I’d be ready.” Heather hooked her thumbs through her belt loops. She wandered toward the swing set. “Did you ever play Spider?”

Valencia tilted her head. “Did I pretend to be a spider? Was that a thing?”

Heather regarded her with amusement. “No, dude. On the swings. I’ll show you.” She cautiously lowered herself onto a seat. “Now you climb on, and one of your legs goes on either side of me.”

Valencia’s eyebrows lifted. Sweat prickled over her pores. “You want me to what now?”

“It’s tricky even when you’re sober but it’s fun, I swear. I can help you get started.” Heather crooked a finger and beckoned. “Please? With one person it’s just, like, regular swinging.”

Valencia bit her lip. “Okay, but don’t you dare drop me.”

“Cross my heart and, well, hopefully none of the other stuff. I’m only twenty-six.” She tapped the chains on the swing. “Hold onto these while you put the first leg through. It keeps you steady. Kinda. Also, lead with your left. That way, the dominant leg is still supporting you.”

Valencia adhered to the instructions. She still swayed dangerously, but Heather was able to stabilize the shaking of the swing enough to restore balance. The second leg-up was even more hazardous. Valencia yelped and threw herself forward with the motion of the kick. Heather’s feet slipped from the dirt. They had to hold onto each other to keep from tumbling backward as the swing careened in no particular direction. Heather’s forehead touched Valencia’s clavicle. Valencia panted with relief that they had survived the takeoff and tried to ignore the way Heather’s proximity tingled at every point of contact. She gave her friend a subtle push.

“What happens now?”

“The next part doesn’t exactly look like the real thing because actual spiders don’t move like that, but it’s the only way to get the swing going, so that’s how it works. You alternate leg movements. Like, I hold mine out while you curl yours under, then you extend yours while I pull mine back. Get it?”

She demonstrated both. Valencia peered cautiously over the side to watch. “Yeah, I’m good. Full speed ahead.”

Heather grinned. She began the process, and Valencia followed her lead. The swing started to move in a recognizable arc.

“It’s working!” Valencia cried excitedly.

“Yep. Ready to kick it up a notch?” Heather’s smile became an adventurous smirk.

Valencia felt butterflies, which she willfully attributed to the rush of their successful endeavor. “Always.”

They picked up momentum, shouting and laughing harder the higher they soared. Valencia leaned away a bit more than she intended. Fear swooped into her gut when her torso pitched backward. Her co-pilot’s arm was around Valencia’s waist before she even had the chance to explain her panic. Heather held fast and eased the swing’s tempo back to something slow and easy. “Don’t worry. I’ve got you.”

When they were nearly to a stop, Heather’s grip returned to the chain links. Their fingers accidentally overlapped, yet she did not adjust her hands to remedy that. Valencia became acutely aware of how little distance stretched between them. Heather’s eyes met hers, but Valencia had to look away. Her gaze fell instead to Heather’s mouth. Unbidden, the Santa Ana dream she’d vocally dismissed at the time resurfaced. 

Would Heather’s lips be as soft and sure against her own as she had unintentionally imagined? Could they fit together that perfectly, tangled into one form until nothing else mattered?

Was it her skewed perception, or was Heather angling closer?

Valencia forgot to breathe. Intense heat built between her thighs. Her heartbeat accelerated so frantically that she couldn’t perceive any other sound.

“I’m glad you taught me that,” she blurted. Valencia’s face burned at the evident strain in her tone. Although she did not know if the undercurrent had been one-sided, a small part of her hated that she had been the one to break their connection. 

Heather blinked. “Yeah, it’s a classic.”

Valencia tried in vain to disengage without aid, but in the end it was impossible to get back on her feet without Heather. The lack of personal space seemed altered somehow, awkward and fumbling. When they were both standing once more, Heather untied her cardigan and pulled it onto her torso. She strode beyond the park perimeter. Valencia hastened her steps to match the pace.

The pair returned to the cement path, walking without talking. Valencia’s insides felt leaden and they twisted with compunction. Her feet were equally under strain, so heavy in the state of remorse that she tripped over a break in the blocks. “Sorry,” Valencia mumbled after Heather turned to check on her. “I’m still a little unsteady, I guess.”

Heather modified her speed until they traveled side-by-side. She offered a reassuring nudge that lifted Valencia’s spirits in an instant. “It’s okay.” Heather’s smile was affectionate and patient. “I’ll be right here if you need me.”

[sw4tch]

((Another vent post i found in my drafts. This one is pretty bad, very Suicidal. Glad I don’t feel like this right now, but reading my past emotions makes me sad.

To cheer me up, I’ll add Annotations to disperse these bad thoughts for future me))

it’s not fair it’s not fair

she fucked me up while i was a child, took my father’s side and took her anger out on me when i was so young, and me, right now, when i take my anger out on her then i’m the bad one, i’m the worst one, i’m the one that ruined her life

I know i ruined her life, that’s all i’m good for and i ruin everything

but when i do it, i don’t deserve my apologies to be taken

even though she has NEVER apologized for anything in her life, never to me, not when she hits me, not when she hits me on accident, not when she makes me cry

BUT I’M THE WORST ONE, i am the worst thing that could have happened to her

I am the Monster

without a will to live and with a dream to be left alone to die

I hate it

I HATE GOING TO A FRIEND’S HOUSE AND WANTING TO DIE BECAUSE THEIR FAMILIES ARE SO NICE TO THEM, AND NICE TO ME

SOMEONE WHO’S INTRUDING AND BOTHERING THEM, ME

“You’re always welcome here” always feel like a stab through the heart

Because it makes me feel wanted and i hate that, admit that i’m a bother and you hate me and that you think i’M UGLY AND DISGUSTING AND THAT I’M THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN TO YOU

HATE ME HATE ME HATE ME HATE ME

I’M FULL OF DISGUSTING FEELINGS AND HATRED AND I’M UGLY AND TOO FAT AND TOO BIG AND TAKE TOO MUCH SPACE AND I SMELL HORRIBLE AND MY FACE IS HORRIBLE AND I HATE EXISTING BECAUSE MY MERE EXISTENCE BOTHERS OTHERS

(( Oh Snaily of the past, you wrote this after going to a friend’s house and it made you feel happy. Why can’t you accept that? People do like you, they love you. Your friend wanted you to live with them at some point remember? People genuinely like you. Being a burden sometimes it’s okay. ))

I apologized to her because i knew yesterday was my slip up. Can’t let her know i hate having her in my life, that she reminds me of everything that’s wrong in my life, that she’s one of the reasons i’m so suicidal

Gotta pretend, as always, that i’m the good “Daughter”, the Good Child, the Golden Child

so i did. But she immediately cried and said something about how she’s sacrificed so much for me and that if she took control of my bank account it was for my own good and hers, and that i am an adult already, i should already know how to take care of myself (i know, i know) and that i can’t go out into the world by being such a toxic person that disrespects the hand that feeds her (i know, i know) that kind of thing doesn’t fly when you have a job (god, i know)

She didn’t accept my apology, said i went too far. That some things can never be forgiven (how funny, shoot me, shoot me, shoot me) and that i really fucked up, because she’s the only one that has looked out for me, she’s the only person in the world that doesn’t deserve my anger (i cried in this part, cried out of anger and frustration, how dare she not know)

“You can’t take your anger out on people, i thought i had thought you better and that you were a smart child. Weren’t you talking about being kind yesterday? You can’t be a hypocrite”

i cried. she’s right. ([Be a good person, that’s all.] i tried, i try, but i’m a horrible person that’s full of hatred and that will eventually hurt their friends. i’m sorry, my life isn’t my own. I can’t be who i want to be)

I’m a hypocrite. I want to hurt and maim others, i want to feel justified when i do, i want to feel good when i hurt others, i want to be validated in my sorrow

(( Your anger is the part of you that loves you and wants people to treat you right. You’re not monstrous for that. Also she literally lied to you here because later on she didn’t do any of her Threats, your anger was justified. Snaily, remember you’re the Abused here.

I know you feel violent sometimes, but you don’t really want to hurt people. You just want to protect yourself ))

That’s the abuse cycle, isn’t it?

My parents hurt me in different ways when i was a child, they cursed me, so now i’m cursed to turn into a monster at the sight of moonlight and rip my friends limb from limb with my fangs

I’m cursed, i’m cursed, and i’ll hurt anyone that i see vulnerable enough to take my bite

and i don’t want that

I’ve talked about it, haven’t i? How i don’t want to be a monster

Ali said i wasn’t. But Ali won’t even talk to me anymore because she probably realized i’m a weird creep that idolizes too much and gets obsessed with people that treat them right in the slightest. She won’t talk to me because she realized that maybe i am a monster.

(( Ali stopped talking to you because life happened! It’s not that deep. Sometimes friends drift apart. Hopefully she still thinks fondly of you. As much as you think fondly of her. People drift and leave, it’s part of life. It’s okay. ))

So i keep thinking, that i can’t let myself hurt anyone else. My mother brought it up today (”You’ll just end up hurting others, don’t you see?”) But i do see, mother.

So i have to be the one that kills the monster. A dead beast can’t kill or maim, can’t pass on the curse of abuse if they’re dead.

It always gets this bad, i always want to die, and when i try to be a good person it becomes evident i’ll never be

I’m too full of hatred for that

I think i’ll be safe once i get out of here, of the hellhole, but that’s a silly illusion isn´t it?

You can take the child out of the hell hole, but you can never take out the hellhole out of the child

not with therapy, not with a good environment, not with a good life, not that i deserve one anyway

A beast will always be a beast

An abused child will become an abuser

And a bad person can never try to be anything else but that

(( You’re not a bad person for feeling miserable, for feeling angry, for being hurt and having these big Big emotions! That might be your possible BPD talking. Therapy would really help you, never ever doubt that your life would be better once you leave this bad environment and get proper treatment ))

----------------------------

I keep thinking about how pear seeds can be toxic if you eat enough of them. Have a grinder at home, can make my own suicide dust, put in my own food and we’re done, happy end, happily ever after.

Don’t have pears. I hate pears.

I keep thinking about how in a robbery, people are desperate enough nowadays to shoot me dead if i refuse to cooperate

I’ll refuse to cooperate, i will and then i’ll be dead. Happily ever after, and the bus will get up and cheer

I’m a coward. How would that work

I keep thinking about how to make someone kill me. Roadkill. But how? 

Should put my life up on the dark web, someone must want to pay for the Thrill of Killing a Living Person, i’d give them that, i’d be good for something for once

These all all just sweet fairytales, aren’t they? The fantasy that it won’t hurt or that it won’t be my fault when i’m dead and people get inconvenienced by it.

I wanna be roadkill, explode into million of pieces, picked up in bags by some poor bastard that just wants to go home instead of touching dead flesh. 

Then i will sleep. And rest. And my back won’t hurt. And my longing and heartache won’t be there anymore.

I lost my will to live a few days ago. Because i missed a presentation out of pure anxiety. Of feeling like a failure.

I’ll tell you a secret, the feeling of failure has been with me ever since. It haunts me, because i know, this time, it’s real. I was supposed to be better, be a good hardworker, not a lazy piece of shit.

Being lazy doesn’t feel good for me, it makes me realize i truly am mediocre.

(( Being mediocre isn’t a crime you know. You don’t have to be exceptional. You just have to be you. And be gentle with you. I’m sorry you felt suicidal. I love you ))

---------------------------------------------------------------

My mother said that 6 months after i graduate, that’ll be all. After that she’ll be gone and not support me economically anymore.

That i brought this onto me.

That’s what i get, for slipping up.

(( This is again manipulation. She never goes through with it!!! She’s just manipulating you, trying to keep you under her thumb!! It’s okay Snaily. You’ll be okay. You don’t deserve her gaslighting and manipulation. But you need to know you’re being wronged, even if you’re not in the right sometimes ))

I deserve that.

Six months. I’ll never get a job and i’ll continue to be a failure and i would have wasted everyone’s time.

That’s all i’m good for.

Six months. That’s nothing. There’s not enough jobs. And i’m not talented enough to get a job so fast. I’m no one, and i’ll always be. 

Talentless hack with a diploma, that would be me.

six months. That’s good. That’s good. I deserve it. It’ll force me to grow. Or sink.

Oh, i’ll sink. 

I’ll sink. While i watch my friends fly away onto jobs i wish i had, because they had what i didn’t:

Talent, A Will to Live, A Future

while i sink.

That can’t be too bad. When i say this, i honestly feel good for them in that scenario. I’m not bitter, not against them anyway. Because I love them, and love should never be about jealousy, should never be tainted with that.

Because that’s not love. True love is wanting your friends to grow and become the best version of themselves. I really want that for them.

I’m just sad i can’t do the same, because of me and me only.

Wonder how expensive a gun is. Maybe i will get a job. Save enough for one and some ammo. Then boom.

Talentless hack no more.

Maybe i can get two guns, fire them both at the same time, one for the mouth, one for the top of my head. 

Flawless execution.

And then i’ll get to see my grandpa, finally, again.

(( He’d be sad to see you in such circumstances. He loved you. As much as you loved him. He’d want for you to live a long fulfilling life. You can do it. Just wait a little longer. You’ll get out of here. I swear. I’ll hold your hand the whole way through. I love you. I love you. I love you ))

[thejokersenigma]

Joker x Reader - Strictly Business Part 5

Hi guys, I’m desperately trying to keep up with my writing - so here’s a new part for you!

Its a bit shorter than usual, but I felt like that was good place to finish this part!

I hope you enjoy!

As always feel free to leave comments/messages etc. I really miss them!

Also if you have requests or anything just let me know!

MASTERLIST

I soon gathered as I wandered through the building that we must be in a huge warehouse. The corridors were bare and concrete and several times we crossed large open rooms that spanned far into the darkness on either side of me, and the ceiling was nowhere in sight. I climbed a tall staircase and walked a long corridor until I had wound up in the room I now found myself locked in. It was larger than the last one, and looked more comfortable too. There was a large four-poster double bed in the centre of the room, a simple chest of drawers with a tall wing back chair between it and a door that must once have led to a store cupboard but was now a wardrobe.

There was a single window, but the curtains were drawn over it and I soon figured out why when I pulled them away to find the glass cloudy and streaky with grime so I couldn’t see out of it apart from a few shadowy outlines of what I guess were buildings or lamp posts.

When I reached a tentative hand out to wiped at the glass I withdrew my hand, searching for the shadow of filth I had wiped off, but I found my fingers perfectly clean. The grime was on the outside. The room itself was completely pristine, but the outside was far from it. The building probably just looked like one of the many grubby, abandoned warehouses scattered around Gotham - and maybe some of the other rooms here did – but this one, when I turned away from the window, looked like something close to a penthouse suite. The detailed floral wallpaper and the plush carpets that made it hard to remember there was hardwearing concrete surrounding me.

However, as nice as the room was, I was still locked in here. I had heard the latch turn when the door was closed behind the henchman that had escorted me in here. I didn’t know where the Joker had vanished to, and I wasn’t sure I was going to find out.

Despite the residual pounding in my skull from the knock out I had inhaled, I refused the overwhelming temptation to lie down on the large, cushiony bed. Instead I continued to pace, hoping the movement would keep me conscious, despite the constant drag of the drug on my mind. I rubbed at my face with my hands aggressively, willing myself to keep alert.

I continued to pace back and forth for at least half an hour before my feet began to protest and my mind was falling asleep to the same monotonous striding and turning. I was going to be asleep on my feet soon. I gave in to the urge and allowed myself to perch on the edge of the bed, soon allowing myself to fall backwards onto the duvet and cushions behind me. This is fine. I could just lie here and wait. At least I could hear if anyone approached the door.

The next I knew my eyes snapped open and I briefly had no idea where I was. It flooded back to me quickly and I scrambled off the bed, on my feet in an instant, tense and my muscles ready for fight or flight.  

There was a slight delay for my mind to catch up to my sudden movements as I scanned the room and I almost didn’t immediately acknowledged the man sat in the wingback chair. My eyes snapped back to him. The Joker. He wore the same clothes as I had seen him in earlier, so clearly, I couldn’t have been out too long. He sat with his legs open wide, a cane planted between his feet and both hands folded over the handle as he waited patiently, his eyes serious and ringed with dark shadows, his mouth a vibrant red and slightly hung open as he watched me. I stared back at him for a moment before I had an idea. If he was here… My gaze darted to the doorway that was now directly in front of me, the Joker to my right and on the other side of the bed. I immediately looked back to him, not willing to take my eyes off him for too long. If he was in here, should I try to make a run for it? I couldn’t guarantee that he hadn’t locked himself in here with me, or that there weren’t henchmen waiting on the other side as guards, but was it worth a chance if I could make a run for it?

Then a movement caught my eye and I let my eyes stray from the Joker long enough to realise that stood near to him, hidden from my view behind the thick curtains that hung around each of the posts of the bed, stood a suited man. As if reading my mind, or having received a silent order, the man strode across the room and stopped so that he now silently blocked my path to the door.

I didn’t know why I was locked in here, or why Joker was in here too, but it was clear leaving was not an option thanks to the large, muscular guard that now barred my exit. I took a breath when I realised I had been holding it. The last thing I wanted to do now was show any kind of fear. That was a weakness in this criminal’s eyes and I didn’t want to show him any weakness. I tried to gain back some control on the situation - the more I looked out of control and panicked by what was going on, the more the Joker would think he had the upper hand. That wasn’t something I wanted.

I gave the guard a brief, forced smile which I then turned on J in a way to say I would play along with their little game without a struggle. I walked past the guard who turned as I moved past him, eyes following my movements I walked around the bed so I was on the same side as the Joker before then perching myself on the edge of the bed so I faced him. Ready and waiting for the reason he was here, in my mind trying to turn this into a business meeting. I knew how to work those situations and it was clear that the Joker wanted something from me – and I in turn wanted something from him. I wasn’t in much of a position to start making wild demands, but I could make something work - this was my terrain after all.

I interlaced my fingers together and rested them on my lap. “I presume you are after something from me?” I asked, polite and formal, like I was in a meeting for a new business negotiation.

“Leave.” The Joker suddenly said, his eyes on me and I thought for a moment it was directed at me, but then I heard the door close and I glanced behind me to see the large man had left. I turned my attention back to the Joker who was still considering me over his cane. His eyes felt like they were reading every rebellious thought in my mind. His face was still deadly serious when he spoke, none of the joking I had previously known. “Well, doll.” He began, his tone matching my own and playing along with me so for a moment I truly felt we were back in my board room. However, I caught a dangerous glint in his eyes when he leant toward me and the dim light through the break in the curtains caught his eye. “You see, I’ve just been looking over the details of a job planned for tonight.” He explained, suddenly producing a familiar folder and waving it around in the air as he spoke. “When I discovered a series of scribbles and annotations on the plans.” He mused, flicking through the folder for effect, clearly not reading anything he was seeing. “Now…” He drawled, “I am pretty sure it wasn’t me…” he mused, but for a moment I thought he might actually be taking this into serious consideration. “So, either someone decided this was a good document to doodle in, or I would say someone was trying to edit a carefully constructed plan.” His eyes had been down on the papers the whole time, but now they shot up to me suggestively and I had to stop myself from flinching at the accusing look.

“And… - whilst the idea of torturing and interrogating everyone in the building does sound fun…” He drawled, tilting his head as he acknowledged the enjoyment this would give him, “It would be a terrible waste of my precious time…” He pondered to himself and I felt like he was toying with.

I could feel a lump in my throat and I swallowed. Why did I feel so threatened? Maybe because it’s you he’s talking about, muttered a voice in my head.

Suddenly the Joker was on his feet. “Of course, there are ways to narrow down my list of suspects.” He mused to himself, pacing slow steps in front of me “ – to make sure I can fit the punishment into my busy day.” He was talking as though it was only him in the room. “After all, it is hard to ignore the rather delicate feminine style of the writing,” He murmured, “and the overwhelming fact that you were the only one in my office today other than the two guards you so kindly knocked out.” His eyes now met me, finally acknowledging my existence as he stepped, the folder still clenched in his hand. I wished he go back to ignoring me as his blues eyes made me want to squirm. I couldn’t help but feel like I was in the gallows, on trial for a crime I was definitely guilty of.

“So, what I want from you, princess, is this,” my executioner summarised. “Did you by any chance try to edit my plan?”

Guilty. “Yes.” I admitted. There was no point in denying it. I expected I was probably the only girl in this entire building so my ‘feminine writing’ was evidence enough, I might as well confess. “I was bored, so I looked through your desk.” I saw his jaw tighten slightly at this. “I read through several old plans of yours, and then discovered that one.” I nodded towards the folder in his hand. “I thumbed through it and found several details that appeared to be quite flawed and possibly problematic. I used my available time to rectify them.” I said confidently, no apology in my voice.

The Joker raised his invisible eyebrows at my confession. “And you, kitten, think your additions have added something to this scheme?” He asked incredulously, with a mocking smile, and a quiet, dangerous calm voice - which was more frightening that if he just yelled at me. I swallowed back my fear, trying to keep a hold on my courage.

“Maybe!” I snapped at him, annoyed at how arrogant he was being and I watched as any sign of humour dropped from his face. I was on thin ice now.

But I’d managed to pull one over on him before – back at the party – however long ago that was. So why did he still not think any of my ideas would be any good? Maybe because he managed to pull one over on you too when he kidnapped you the small voice reminded me from the back of my mind.

I scowled at my own annoy thoughts before turning my attention back on the crime lord that still stood before me.

“Have you even bothered to read any of my suggestions?” I asked, irritated at him and now myself, ignoring the sinister look in his eyes that told me he was not impressed with my gall.

“Cute, doll.” He patronised me with a wide grin that made his eyes go almost squinty. “But all my plans go off without fail, as long as the bat doesn’t get involved,” he muttered bitterly, “and I know for a fact he’s occupied elsewhere tonight.” He added, perking up again, “I don’t require your input – however keen you are to give it.” He said snidely looking down at me still sat on the bed.

I let out a loud, heavy sigh. “Look.” I snapped in annoyance, shoving myself to my feet so I was basically eye level with him. “I’m not saying your plan wouldn’t work – hell with your madness I’m certain it probably would!” I exclaimed, throwing my hand in the air in exasperation, “but,” I said quickly, holding up a finger to him, “you’d probably end up losing at least half of your men and you risk leaving some sort of evidence behind you – you’re taking too many risks for really no good reason.” I pointed out, crossing my arms in finality.

“That’s the flare, doll.” He pointed out stubbornly.

I rolled my eyes. “You’d rather there be flare and an increased risk of the plan failing and you being caught?”

“Watch it, doll.”

I frowned, ignoring his warning. I thought for a moment. “Let me see that.” I held out my hand for the folder. The Joker hesitated, not use to people demanding things from him. He seemed to be considering between doing what I asked or shooting me.

He growled in annoyance at me, twisting his neck as if this moment was painfully difficult. I didn’t react to his behaviour, simply keeping my hand out towards him, waiting patiently until he was ready and he begrudgingly handed it over to me.

I took it from him and flicked through to the main page where I had done most of my edits on. I ran my eyes over the plan and the alterations again. I turned my back on the Joker, facing the bed and bending over to flattening the map of the museum floors out onto the duvet, barely registering that I had no longer had my eyes on the criminal still supposedly stood behind me. “Look.” I said, snapping myself back upright and proudly waving down at the paper. “Flare.”

I glanced back at the Joker to see if he was listening and I thought I saw the Joker’s eyes snap up from my ass, but I was probably just imaging it. I raised an eyebrow at him, but he ignored it, moving to my side without comment, as if nothing had happened. He studied the paper on the bed and I narrated for him, pointing out my ‘scribbles’. “You see, all these rooms have these large screens that play back what some of the security cameras are seeing - so people can see they’re being watched.” I explained, pointing out the areas where I had drawn on little boxes to represent screens. “Hack into these and you can have all the ‘flare’ of making snarky comments at someone in the room without actually risking being in that same room.” I explained, my eyes on the map, worried I’d lose my courage if I looked at the Joker’s unimpressed face. “Plus – the fact you’re on that screen will make it look like you’re in the main control room. The cops and security will run up to the top floor where the control room is, giving your men plenty of time to do what they need to downstairs without any problem - or at least with fewer cops in the way. All the while whoever is on the screen can be safe and comfy somewhere else entirely! Hell, you could probably get the connection to run all the way back here!”

Suddenly the blueprint was snatched out from under my gaze. I looked up to the Joker where he glared down at me with a dark scowl. “That smart mouth of yours is going to get you in trouble, doll.” He warned me with a low growl, before he strode out of the room without another word. I heard the lock turn behind him, leaving me alone in the room and realising I had never tried to make a deal with him and I had no idea what was going to happen to me now.

tags: @carouselcurls @aqswdefrgthzjukilop @toxic-ink @viraldragonrider @6fish6 @arkhamsurviour @theartistdetective @white-chocolate-mocha-fan @blondieinthecity

[weepingstar]

From Famine to Feast

Credence had never had the pleasure of reading anything other than his mother’s printed sermons, her annotated Bible and the occasional hymn at Christmas. Mary Lou believed anything other than that was conjured to distract you from the Lord’s word and path. Credence usually nods in agreement and tries not to think about the nights he reads a tattered novel he found once on the street, now hidden under a floorboard beneath his bed.

So, upon moving into the home of Mr. Graves (for as long as he should wish, forever even, if that’s what he would like Mr. Graves tells him) he’s quite overwhelmed. For many reasons of course, but especially because Mr. Graves appears to be an avid reader, even has his own library, with books in languages Credence has never heard of, topics he’d never imagined. Credence limits himself to asking to borrow just one book at a time despite Graves’ insistence that anything in the house is his, agonises over which one he should choose this week. Credence reads, and he reads, and he reads.

Read on AO3

(hey! so i’ve been going through my imagines and little fics and slowly editing/lengthening/transferring them onto AO3, this one was a little long, but i do still intend to post them all on here too. please go leave kudos or something because i’m a creature driven by my ego okay love you xox)

Graves will often find him tucked away in a large armchair by the fire in his study, eyes drooping shut or already closed by the time Graves returns home from work. Knows the boy always has a book in the pocket of his warm wool coat he’d bought him, just in case the opportunity would arise for him to read a few pages. Loves to see his boy sucking and nibbling at the side of his thumb when concentrating especially hard on a particular passage.

Credence reads basic books on magic during the terrible rains that September and October bring, finds time for the occasional classical novel in the month of November, and is keen on either lighthearted works or deeply serious and thought provoking volumes in December. Graves has to warn off Credence from a few things in his library, when the boy had stumbled across Magick Moste Evile he’d told Credence that not all the books were suitable for him to read, but as an auror he’d had to be aware of them. Credence, ever the obedient boy, puts the volume back in it’s place and goes off to find another.

Graves is very aware of his little bookworm, has started to gradually add more to his already staggering collection, tries his best to recall books that he loved during his childhood, brings Credence books that had helped him when his mother had died in his early teenage years. Firmly clenches Credence’s shoulder when he sees a tear running down his soft cheek at that particular book, perhaps that hadn’t been the best idea.

Brings him The Tales of Beedle the Bard, explains he read them when he was a little boy, had them read to him too. Credence enthusiastically nods his sweet little head and goes off to read it straight away, secretly hoping it might give him a peek into Graves’ mind as a young boy. Credence carefully enquires about the prevalence of Hippogriff’s in North America after reading The Monster Book of Monsters, Graves assures him that pigs would fly before Credence encountered a Hippogriff in their home, and not to worry, please. Graves begins to see a trend in Credence’s interest in the magical world, that is to say, unfortunately, Divination. Graves almost throws himself off a bridge when he realises he’s buying Credence a copy of The Dream Oracle as well as Unfogging the Future, thinks he’s not only gone soft for the boy but entirely insane. Picks up a copy of Famous Fire-Eaters - one of his keen interests as a rowdy fourth year - to balance his purchases out a little.  Upon presenting Credence with the three books, his boy's eyes light up as he immediately goes to read them, Graves finds Famous Fire-Eaters a week later with a bookmark on the second page, the other two Divination books read in their entirety and annotated.  

On one particular evening, for whatever reason Graves isn’t quite sure (Credence would surely call it Fate), he goes to sit next to his boy on the cosy couch in the living room, plucks his most recent love from his fingers, and begins to read aloud to him.

He’s shocked by his own gumption, and at the same time wonders why he’s never done so before. Credence is obviously a little embarrassed at first, telling Graves that he really doesn’t have to, are you sure you really don’t mind, isn’t the book too boring for you Mr. Graves? But once settled and reassured, he rallies round quickly, avidly listening to Graves’ deep voice read Charles Dickens to him, snow softly falling outside of the window, the fire embers glowing in the hearth. They pass through several chapters without really realising, sometimes stopping to discuss a certain line or for Credence to ask the meaning of a particular word, more to speak to Graves than from any real curiosity. Credence growing closer and closer to Graves until the boy could almost read the book himself over Graves’ shoulder, Graves also is surprised to find his arm wrapped tightly around the boy’s shoulder, not entirely believing he put it there himself.

Graves tells Credence they should finish the book before Christmas, together.

Although Graves holds several medals for bravery amongst other things, had won a fair few trophies in his days at Ilvermorny and beyond, and as the Director of Magical Security and head of MACUSA’s Magical Law Enforcement, one might say he was an accomplished man. However, if you were to ask Graves himself, he would say his greatest accomplishment was this, taking a previously broken boy and slowly putting him back together, reminding him of human compassion and gentleness, it would be the feeling of Credence’s head resting on his shoulder as he reads to him, snow still falling outside but not a chill felt between the two of them.

[oceangl1tter]

personal complaints against grass, future ideas, alcohol and its sidekick, mango juice, & the Eng,lish, Literature,tsunami, called, Fu,.

Lying in grass looking at the sky is not as freeing as it seems. Why is it that grassfields in parks always happen to be itchy and prickly on the skin? Why can't I just watch these clouds in comfort? and not be horrendously tickled by the furs of bugbodies climbing up my calves?

--

future things I’m itching to write about:

past lovers as colors of my nailpolish

medium-rare carnal fantasies and a side-dish of Grilled Sesame-Soy Shishito Peppers, an embarrassing meal

a tell-tale of lugging death out of the floorboards

“INFP and unrequited love: name a more iconic duo“

--

It's not like how it looks on Snapchats, or maybe I just went to a dead party but I don't think that was the case. I went early which I realized was a mistake. Nothing really started till 10:45. Fastforward sitting in the corner while girls in shorts and tanks huddle in cliques waiting for someone to approach them. I did my introductions, none of them invited me into their huddled circles. Fastforward more sitting, more talking to people around me--names I don't forget, but I guess I'm a name that people forget. I’ve never had alcohol before. My heart is beating beating beating beating ! ! ! I look it up on WebMD and WebMD says I’m okay and you already know WebMD doesn’t lie. Shit is sizzling down my throat and slushing its way into an empty stomach. I down 8 shots for some reason, actually there is a reason. He’s an easy guy to talk to. Cue a future accidental date with him. Apparently you're not supposed to mix lights and darks, which no one really told me, 'cept the guy who offered me a chaser-- the star of the show: mango juice (which I proceeded to vomit in various places, the restroom inside the apartment, the restroom near the swimming pool, the trashcan bag outside of my dorm e.t.c.). I guess 8 shots is a lot. I didn't eat that day b/c I was studying for the upcoming mid-term and surprisingly I didn't get as f*cked up as people like to portray, or maybe I'm not as lightweight as I thought I'd be. Or Maybe I got it from my dad. Still could think straight, remember people's names as they slip into unconsciousness blubbering about power rangers or something. No drunk texts going out, no one to text anyway about this.  There's nothing good to share, except a terrible experience, as this girl (one of the people hosting the party)--______,standard Korean beauty.., red-faced and less-shy than her sober self rubs your elbow and asks if you're okay, if you liked the party, if it was fun. Yes, no, and no. She's too close to say no so I nod and give a reassuring smile. The party's too early to be over but it is. People ask if I have a ride, I say I do and that's that. People clear out, others stay and chat.. but I'm just drunk walking down a dark street waiting for the lyft. Holding a red cup of water, my trusty bag, and my head.

I lyft home lugging a large garbage bag I asked the partyhosters if I could borrow (thought i'd cherish it as a keepsake...hah). Get to outside my dorm and sit on a bench and pathetically vomit shit into the bag. I don't quite make it to actually opening the bag so it almost serves as a tissue as the vomit just smears across my face. Mmm mango delight. I guess the pros of not eating and drinking is that nothing that entirely yucky comes up. An RA comes a long, sits down with me for a hot second, just to see if I'm okay. I'm okay. Physically not, mentally tired and ready to go to bed.

Get into my dorm walk around a little bit before I actually key into my room. Later walk down the same hallway and see marks trekked on the carpet and I think which fucking frat boy vomited these stains and my half-fazed brain realizes it was my dumb ass bag I've been lugging around like a 3 year old toddler on my back. The vomit must have either leaked through or had always been at the bottom. Yikes. Fastforward to now (10:30 am) still feel like shit, but in a different sense, not the fk my life fk this party that was so fking terrible sort of impending vomiting sense but the empty stomach soul-searching terrible sort of sense. My roommate doesn't care. I wish she did. I listened to her issues and now she wants to transfer rooms. It's fine. I'll just lament by myself then. Go to more parties as a lone stranger. Leave as a lone stranger.

---

Despite my Freshman/Senior English teacher (a stick-thin Asian woman with impeccable skin who pretty much deep-fried anxiety into me, I’m not even kidding :( ) deducting a point on my essays for each comma used wrong, I still don’t know how these hooked things work and at at this point I’m too scared to ask. I’ll just sprinkle them however I please and recall the times when I’d be stunned at watching 91s turn into 82s. Turns out she now follows me on Instagram (she only followed a few students?) and ALL of her posts are her impersonating her cat (complete with all the hashtags that pet instagram users tend to add) like what the fuck LMAO. I’m not saying I wasn’t a fool as a Freshman (as all Freshman are, invariably) but Freshman year I had cried in the corner in her class, sniffles and everything, while the rest of the class worked on their tests(let’s call it a combination of bad luck with Shakespeare and my test getting crumpled by her...), been handed a referral, that stupid ass pink slip, gotten rekt in a mock-interview exercise (b/c apparently a hat twisted back over my head and a beige frock isn’t a convincing outfit for Elizabeth Bennet... but like.. I didn’t think there were standards to begin with), and interrogated in annotation audits for Crime and Punishment and Hamlet despite students furiously scribbling on post-its behind her. All flashbulb memories. And what do you know. She’s a cat lady with a cat instagram. (It does feel kind of nice that I sort of got her approval in the end though..:>) It only took a few instances of public berating to get it and a half-baked understanding of commas.

[chrisaldrich]

Some thoughts on highlights and marginalia with examples

Earlier today I created a read post with some highlights and marginalia related to a post by Ian O’Bryne. In addition to posting it and the data for my own purposes, I’m also did it as a manual test of sorts, particularly since it seemed apropos in reply to Ian’s particular post. I thought I’d take a stab at continuing to refine my work at owning and controlling my own highlights, notes, and annotations on the web. I suspect that being able to better support this will also help to bring more self-publishing and its benefits to the halls of academe.

At present I’m relying on a PESOS solution to post on another site and syndicate a copy back to my own site. I’ve used Hypothesis, in large part for their fantastic UI and as well for the data transfer portion (via RSS and even API options), to own the highlights and marginalia I’ve made on the original on Ian’s site. Since he’s syndicated a copy of his original to Medium.com, I suppose I could syndicate copies of my data there as well, but I’m saving myself the additional manual pain for the moment.

Rather than send a dozen+ webmentions to Ian, I’ve bundling everything up in one post. He’ll receive it and it would default to display as a read post though I suspect he may switch it to a reply post for display on his own site. For his own use case, as inferred from his discussion about self-publishing and peer-review within the academy, it might be more useful for him to have received the dozen webmentions. I’m half tempted to have done all the annotations as stand alone posts (much the way they were done within Hypothesis as I read) and use some sort of custom microformats mark up for the highlights and annotations (something along the lines of u-highlight-of and u-annotation-of). At present however, I’ve got some UI concerns about doing so.

One problem is that, on my site, I’d be adding 14 different individual posts, which are all related to one particular piece of external content. Some would be standard replies while others would be highlights and the remainder annotations. Unless there’s some particular reason to do so, compiling them into one post on my site seems to be the most logical thing to do from my perspective and that of my potential readers. I’ll note that I would distinguish annotations as being similar to comments/replies, but semantically they’re meant more for my sake than for the receiving site’s sake. It might be beneficial for the receiving site to accept and display them (preferably in-line) though I could see sites defaulting to considering them vanilla mentions as a fallback.  Perhaps there’s a better way of marking everything up so that my site can bundle the related details into a single post, but still allow the receiving site to log the 14 different reactions and display them appropriately? One needs to not only think about how one’s own site looks, but potentially how others might like to receive the data to display it appropriately on their sites if they’d like as well. As an example, I hope Ian edits out my annotations of his typos if he chooses to display my read post as a comment.

One might take some clues from Hypothesis which has multiple views for their highlights and marginalia. They have a standalone view for each individual highlight/annotation with its own tag structure. They’ve also got views that target highlights/annotation in situ. While looking at an original document, one can easily scroll up and down through the entire page’s highlights and annotations. One piece of functionality I do wish they would make easier is to filter out a view of just my annotations on the particular page (and give it a URL), or provide an easier way to conglomerate just my annotations. To accomplish a bit of this I’ll typically create a custom tag for a particular page so that I can use Hypothesis’ search functionality to display them all on one page with a single URL. Sadly this isn’t perfect because it could be gamed from the outside–something which might be done in a classroom setting using open annotations rather than having a particular group for annotating. I’ll also note in passing that Hypothesis provides RSS and Atom feeds in a variety of ways so that one could quickly utilize services like IFTTT.com or Zapier to save all of their personal highlights and annotations to their website. I suspect I’ll get around to documenting this in the near future for those interested in the specifics.

Another reservation is that there currently isn’t yet a simple or standard way of marking up highlights or marginalia, much less displaying them specifically within the WordPress ecosystem. As I don’t believe Ian’s site is currently as fragmentions friendly as mine, I’m using links on the date/time stamp for each highlight/annotation which uses Hypothesis’ internal functionality to open a copy of the annotated page and automatically scroll down to the fragment as mentioned before. I could potentially see people choosing to either facepile highlights and/or marginalia, wanting to display them in-line within their text, or possibly display them as standalone comments in their comments section. I could also see people wanting to be able to choose between these options based on the particular portions or potentially senders. Some of my own notes are really set up as replies, but the CSS I’m using physically adds the word “Annotation”–I’ll have to remedy this in a future version.

The other benefit of these date/time stamped Hypothesis links is that I can mark them up with the microformat u-syndication class for the future as well. Perhaps someone might implement backfeed of comments until and unless Hypothesis implements webmentions? For fun, some of my annotations on Hypothesis also have links back to my copy as well. In any case, there are links on both copies pointing at each other, so one can switch from one to the other.

I could imagine a world in which it would be nice if I could use a service like Hypothesis as a micropub client and compose my highlights/marginalia there and micropub it to my own site, which then in turn sends webmentions to the marked up site. This could be a potential godsend to researchers/academics using Hypothesis to aggregate their research into their own personal online (potentially open) notebooks. In addition to adding bookmark functionality, I could see some of these be killer features in the Omnibear browser extension, Quill, or similar micropub clients.

I could also see a use-case for adding highlight and annotation kinds to the Post Kinds plugin for accomplishing some of this. In particular it would be nice to have a quick and easy user interface for creating these types of content (especially via bookmarklet), though again this path also relies on doing individual posts instead of a single post or potentially a collection of posts. A side benefit would be in having individual tags for each highlight or marginal note, which is something Hypothesis provides. Of course let’s not forget the quote post kind already exists, though I’ll have to think through the implications of that versus a slightly different semantic version of the two, at least in the ways I would potentially use them. I’ll note that some blogs (Colin Walker and Eddie Hinkle come to mind) have a front page that display today’s posts (or the n-most recent); perhaps I could leverage this to create a collection post of highlights and marginalia (keyed off of the original URL) to make collection posts that fit into my various streams of content. I’m also aware of a series plugin that David Shanske is using which aggregates content like this, though I’m not quite sure this is the right solution for the problem.

Eventually with some additional manual experimentation and though in doing this, I’ll get around to adding some pieces and additional functionality to the site. I’m still also interested in adding in some of the receipt/display functionalities I’ve seen from Kartik Prabhu which are also related to some of this discussion.

Is anyone else contemplating this sort of use case? I’m curious what your thoughts are. What other UI examples exist in the space? How would you like these kinds of reactions to look on your site?

Editor's note:This post was originally published on BoffoSocko.com

[fashiontrendin-blog]

We Tried the Reverse Holiday Diet

http://fashion-trendin.com/we-tried-the-reverse-holiday-diet/

We Tried the Reverse Holiday Diet

This piece was originally published in December 2015. Can you even freaking believe it? An oldie but a goodie, we wanted to share our joint holiday extravaganza. Honestly, it’s all for you, Seth Cohen.

Amelia is Jewish only when it is convenient. That is, if you call her on Yom Kippur, you can rest assured she is eating a sandwich and reminding you about her baptism. When Purim rolls around, though? She’s the queen of costumes and alcoholic beverage consumption. Eating at a restaurant and the special is tender pork belly? She’s on it! And then as though it never happened, there she is, smearing white fish over her bagel, gossiping about the girls from Bridge club.

But I’ve had it, you know? She’s never even attempted atonement. So this year, at the intersection of our faiths: she put on her Hanukkah hat, I test drove (without a license!) right down St. Nick’s lane. There was only rule, which was that Amelia would write a diet for me and I would write one for her.

Here is what she put together, annotated with my reactions.

1) You’re going to need some sort of tree, or a wreath, or at the very least something to decorate.

I cannot commit to bringing Christ into my home, but I will happily pose with a tree on 1st Street, which is close enough.

Leandra: 1, Christmas: 1, Amelia: dead.

2) You will exclusively play Christmas music, and it has to be playing non-stop.

This was absolutely no problem whatsoever — I listen to the Frank Sinatra and Ella Fitzgerald holiday stations on Pandora almost exclusively, which I mentioned in a post that went live on December 11th. Two for me, Glen Coco. But I hate peppermint.

3) Throw/Attend at least one ugly sweater themed party.

Does claiming ownership over a photo of Beyoncé in the ugliest sweater party sweater count as having completed this task?

4) Drink eggnog

No.

5) Watch: Love Actually, It’s a Wonderful Life, Elf, Home Alone (or please refer to this list)

I watched Home Alone at least six times. Catherine O’Hara has one of the craziest faces I have ever seen on television. It is so underrated that she asks a flight attendant at the airport in Paris if they could help her charter a private plane home to Kevin for Christmas. Also, here’s a fun fact: John Candy improvised that entire scene where he talks about leaving his kid at a funeral home in the polka polka van when they’re getting O’Hara home to Kev. As you can see, I murdered this movie dance floor.

6) Send at least a few Christmas cards.

I did you one better and sent Christmas gifts. Each came with a card, and every single one said the same thing:

Dear Recipient,

Merry Christmas!

Your Jewish friend with a soul made of gelt,

Leandra

And then I attached a phone number for the orthodox Jewish conversion hotline!

7) Bake festive cookies and bring to office

I defer to you, Amelia, to tell the community about the vegan, gluten free cookies that I made for the office. Leave all tales of chipped teeth out — thx.

8) Order/drink a holiday special at Starbucks. Here’s the 2015 lineup:

Caramel Brulée Latte. Chestnut Praline Latte. Christmas Cookie Latte. Eggnog Latte. Gingerbread Latte. Honey And Almond Hot Chocolate. Peppermint Mocha. Toffee Nut Latte.

Leandra and Christmas: 2, Leandra’s waist line: 4777387219.

9) COUNT DOWN THE DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS.

No. Why would I count down the days until the end of my favorite Pandora stations? You are a masochist and I won’t engage with your antics.

10) Dress festive (red/green/sparkly).

I defer to this.

And this.

And this!

And here’s an outfit I wore last Sunday night.

Johanna Ortiz polka dot top and pants

And now, for Amelia’s diet.

So I grew up half-Jewish.

The entire world seemed to buy this or at least let me live until I met Leandra Medine about six years ago and she told me this made no sense. Technically, I understood her reasoning. Theoretically, however, I understood mine more. Dad: Jewish. Mom: Catholic. Me: Guilty.

But whatever, it meant I did a little bit of it all: a first communion here, a cousin’s bar mitzvah there, Easter, Passover, Christmas and Hanukkah. I’ve got about 10% of the prayers on both sides memorized and mumble along with the rest, just like how I sing along to the 2nd verse of Brandy and Monica’s “The Boy is Mine.”

When this holiday season rolled around and Leandra and I decided to swap customs, I secretly assumed I’d win. Channukah was only 8 days long — Christmas starts the second Thanksgiving ends so technically, she was already behind.

But that right there was first mistake. Not assuming I’d win, of course, but in spelling Hanukkah. Chanukah. Ḥanukah. חנוכה. I mean how the fuck do you spell this word if Google gives you 8234567 versions?! Watch me explore the variety in my diet below.

Next came Leandra’s insane assignment list that was designed to raise my cholesterol, get me arrested for cocaine consumption and make me broke.

Behold — her instructions, copied & pasted verbatim, in bold, followed by my results and notes:

1) You must consume at least one powdered jelly donut every single day. You must also make sure that powdered residue remains above your top lip for at least 20 minutes post consumption.

Finding traditional powdered “sufganiyah” with strong-enough Yelp reviews in New York City proved more difficult than one might imagine, especially considering that I am lazy and hate walking into stores.

I ended up spending 20 excruciating minutes on the phone with Doughnut Plant to confirm that their Hanukah doughnuts were legit and another 20 excruciating dollars to have them delivered.

They sent me the wrong ones (these were covered in peanuts as opposed to powder) so unfortunately, no Pablo Escobar ‘stache. They were, however, filled with blackberry jelly. I ate both of course and consider this a win.

Also of note: Leandra baked cookies, and they were actually good. Since she’s Jewish, I now consider these Jewish cookies and give myself an extra credit point.

2) Light the Menorah every night starting tonight and recite the prayers. 

Arguably the most important part of this holiday, I only lit the candle once.

And on the 2nd day. However, my excuse is that upon calling my (Jewish) grandmother to wish her a Happy Hanukah, she told me that lighting candles was very dangerous and not to do it ever again.

2a) You should also tell everyone Kendallabra is trying to steal Hannukah’s thunder.

No, Leandra.

3) Give up meditation for a week and instead play dreidl (basically the same thing)

I don’t meditate (can you tell?!?!?!?!? EIieoSIHG OSHOUh!! ! ! ! !) so this was easy to give up. Meanwhile, dreidel — the 10th word in this “diet” with 100 different variations on its spelling — became my new favorite way to make noise in the office.

4) Eat potato pancakes for breakfast, tell people they’re latkes and that eating them sure beats doing homework.

Another culinary fail. The restaurant “ran out.” I was mad but I’m also half-Irish so I know the struggle of a potato famine well.

5) Buy me a gift every night for all eight nights

It’s the thought that counts?

6) Whenever asked how you’re doing this week, you must answer, “Wonderful! I am celebrating the miracle of light!” — and then go into the extensive Biblical narrative wherein the Maccabees light a menorah in the holy temple and the light lasts for eight days. Then interrupt yourself and say that this is just one of the stories we tell ourselves in order to live.

I opted out and wore a menorah hat instead.

6a) Remind people that though Joan Didion is not Jewish, her birthday does overlap with Hanukah this year.

Mostly I just reminded people how Thanksgiving coincided with Hanukah last year and repeatedly brought up Seth Cohen’s creation of Chrismukkah.

7) Learn to say “suvganiyot,” which means jelly donuts in hebrew.

Easy like the Internet.

8) Memorize the lyrics to this song, become a pubescent boy with the vocal talent of an angel on acid.

I remain a post-pubescent woman. However, I also much prefer the Maccabeats:

9) Stop spending US dollars, force vendors to take “gelt” (it’s gold coin chocolate)

Uber loved this!!!

10) Commit an orthodox conversion

Awkward…Christmas is coming soon, so no can do.

But you didn’t think I’d let myself lose, right?

Just like the Maccabees said — it’s a miracle.

Feature illustration by via The Miami Herald/MCT via Getty Images; collages by Krista Anna Lewis and Emily Zirimis.

[folkfest-blog1]

Assessment: Android Apps on Chrome OS Arrive, Disappoint

New Post has been published on https://folkfests.org/assessment-android-apps-on-chrome-os-arrive-disappoint/

Assessment: Android Apps on Chrome OS Arrive, Disappoint

About a 12 months in the past, I wrote a column suggesting what the important tech agencies have to attempt to accomplish in 2016. For Google, I said: “It would be pretty high-quality if Chromebooks may want to, out of the field, run all Android apps — supplied that, unlike at the latest Pixel C tablet, the Android apps were capable of adapt better to a larger display screen.” I’m satisfied to record that the first Chromebook designed from the ground as much as run Android apps out of the field has arrived, albeit a touch beyond the quit of 2016. It is going on sale this week for $450. It’s known as the Samsung Chromebook Plus, and it runs on an ARM processor, the same kind of processor that powers the good sized majority of smartphones and pills. It changed into designed in near cooperation with Google.

Unfortunately, in my tests of the Plus over the previous few days, I found the Android execution frustrating.

The Android app characteristic continues to be in beta, not all apps paintings, and to a lot of people who do look like awkwardly blown-up smartphone apps, no longer software program that is tailored for the Chromebook’s 12-inch screen. And there are other problems.

Of direction, the Plus, which has a touchscreen and springs with a stylus, remains a Chromebook. That means it runs the Chrome OS on the side of Android apps. And, purely as a Chromebook, It is very excellent. Chrome OS, which is essentially a browser that runs the entirety, inclusive of internet apps, does pleasantly in this version and its ARM processor.

But if you’re seeking out a laptop-fashion, larger-display version of your favorite Android telephone, I cannot advocate the Plus now. Optimizing a massive range of Android apps for the Chromebook is “going to be an extended manner, to be sincere,” one Google respectable conceded, noting the beta label on the Google Play Keep for the Chromebook.

A 2d, very similar, new Samsung Chromebook, the Pro, is due out in April. The most efficient sizeable difference among the 2 is that the Pro runs on a low-stop Intel processor and fees $100 extra. I examined it in short and discovered it to be even buggier in its present day, very pre-launch nation.

I may not say lots Approximately the in any other case identical hardware on these Samsung machines, seeing that I suppose It is the Google pushed Android / Chrome OS blend software it truly is their key declare to fame.

Their screens are shiny, sharp and responsive. As on many laptops, you may rotate the screen around so that the tremendously skinny, mild, 2.four-pound laptop will become an enormously heavy, thick tablet. The stylus fits properly in a slot and works nicely for such things as screen capture, taking handwritten notes and annotating snapshots. The overall layout isn’t in particular horny or smooth. The keyboard lacks a backlight, and the touchpad is a tad small. In my checks, battery lifestyles changed into only shy of eight hours, in spite of large net and app use and streaming a full-period film.

For a higher know-how of the hardware (as well as his very own take on the software program), I advise my colleague Dieter Bohn’s opinions of the Plus and the Seasoned.

Android Writ was large. Um, No.

In comparison to jogging apps on a cell phone, or, more aptly, an iPad, the app revel in at the Samsung Chromebook Plus is noticeably subpar. There are likely several motives for this. Even though this PC uses the same processor family most Android gadgets use, the apps are jogging atop Chrome OS. Google deserves credit for making this painting in any respect. However, It’s still a piece laggy and buggy.

For example, in one case I bumped into, Android apps on the Plus were open However unusable, due to the fact they kept blinking and leaping in the front and lower back of every other hastily. This befell while I used to be on the cell phone with a Google exec who labored at the undertaking. He said it turned into a regarded bug that will be patched this week. And there are other insects.

In my exams, Android apps only crashed or iced up more than one times a day on the Plus. Even a hugely great app like Fb handiest loaded into a part of the display screen with an endless spinning circle in a new right rail. And Google���s own Gmail crashed when I used to be attaching a picture to a message.

But there may be a larger, greater essential problem: Android apps, including Google’s personal, are almost by no means designed to look right and run properly on a massive display screen – even a fashionable-sized pill, not to mention a computer.

There are factors to this. One is visual: Many Android apps look like blown-up telephone apps. Some, like Google News & Climate and Google Doctors, do not seem to resize for the larger display screen, so that they present a surprisingly slender column of textual content swimming in unnaturally large borders. Others, like Fb Messenger, stretch the textual content horizontally to fill the gap, in an unusual manner that makes the kind tiny.

The alternative is functional: maximum Android apps I downloaded to the Plus didn’t use the larger displays to add useful greater panels or other UI elements, However nonetheless had the slender, cramped UI of a smartphone screen.

That is in stark evaluation to the way iOS apps behave on larger iPad screens versus iPhone screens. As an example, at the iPad, Fb Messenger has two panels – one for contacts and one for conversations. It would not look like the unmarried-column version on iPhones and Android telephones – and at the Plus.

That is due to the fact Apple has lengthy given developers the tools and the encouragement to do twin (or “general”) variations of their apps, and its app Save installs the bigger-screen versions on iPads.

Google says it’s miles working tough to try this, But it’s been announcing that for years. The business enterprise says It is optimizing its personal apps for the Chromebook and urging 0.33 parties to do the identical. However, judging from the 20 or so 9aaf3f374c58e8c9dcdd1ebf10256fa5 Android apps I tested, this manner is simply beginning.

The corporation conceded it had done first paintings to make several of its maximum popular Android apps, such as Gmail and Google Calendar, look and work nicely. However, it additionally stated that it believes maximum Chromebook customers will nevertheless use many productiveness apps like those within the browser.

Another issue: In pill mode, apps are constantly full display. You can’t create the multi-app perspectives or even narrow sidebar views of apps that you could on an iPad or a Home windows pill. Google says this could be possible for a future launch.

Backside Line

In case you purchase the Chromebook Plus and intend to apply it mainly as a Chromebook, I expect you will have an excellent experience. But in case you plan to rely firmly on Android apps, you’re shopping for into the start of an adventure, replete with extraordinary-looking shows of acquainted apps, insects and crashes. You may only go along with Google and Samsung on this journey. However, I can’t advise that for a mainstream Android lover who just wishes things to paintings right.

The way to Pick out the SatisfactoryWireless Android Tablet

Inside the age of smartphones and pills, Android-powered devices have correctly controlled to carve an entirely unique identity for them. All the Android-powered gadgets are well-known for their consumer- friendly interface as well as the cheap apps and video games to be had with them. Even though those apps have been already a part of many smart telephones that got here before Android, these have been expensive sufficient that now not all people become capable of finding the money for them. With the advent of Android powered smart telephones and drugs Within the marketplace, this whole range of high give up video games as well as apps became extra reachable to the common masses.

Android tablets have a bonus over different drugs available Inside the market. These pills are powered with one of the maximum efficient and transportable working structures to be had nowadays i.e., Android itself. Those are uniquely customizable as nicely. The reliability, as well as useful features furnished by using Android, is the motive why some the car producers Within the world also are interested in it that allows you to locate something beneficial and attractive for their clients.

Mainly speaking of Android drugs, it is a known reality that an entirely new range of tablets has exploded Inside the digital market. Other than this, the new variety of programs and video games that accompany those drugs are also commendable. However, most of these choices can place humans in a huge catch 22 situations. To make it less complicated for everybody to effortlessly and accurately put money into an Android Pill, beneath are a few elements which must be kept in thoughts earlier than making an investment in an Android-powered Pill. So that you can make a smart choice, scroll down and take a look at some the factors to be stored in thoughts earlier than shopping for an Android Tablet.

  1. Reason/ Usage of Pill

Interestingly, a huge range of tablets is available on the Android platform. Thosevariety from application tablets for grownups to the user pleasant and educative pills for youngsters. The Children’s Secure Pill is specially designed for kids if you want to assist them in diverse educative applications worried in their curriculum. It can be used for the Purpose of gambling video games and solving puzzles as well. Additionally, there are the usual bigger and smarter tablets supposed for grownups. These drugs are as efficient as a full- fledged PC.

The perks of selecting separate tablets for you and your children is that it will indeed lessen the damage and tear which kids regularly leave on their discern’s tablets. So, step one is to determine the Reason for that you are planning to put money into an Android Pill.

2. Size of the Pill

After figuring out the Motive of making an investment in an Android Tablet, the following step is to decide the size of the Pill. Fortuitously, Android-powered drugs are available in a diffusion of sizes. One of the maximum attractive in addition to a sweet truth about a Tablet is that its miles compact in Length. The glossy layout and smart constructed of a Pill is what makes them smooth to carry and look after. Even as it is not possible to hold a Pc round and when you consider that laptops are massive in Size, pills are what come to anyone’s rescue.

The 7-inch drugs from Android are manner cheaper than many other pills to be had Within the market. But if you are interested in gambling games and the use of apps in your Pill, the ones 10-inch tablets are simply perfect for you. Even as smaller drugs are comfortable to hold around, bigger ones have their percentage of advantages as nicely. As an example, watching movies and gambling games is something that may be without difficulty accomplished on a large Pill. Given that Android tablets may be notably customized, bigger drugs make the complete experience extra fun and mesmerizing for the customers. So, the second one component to be saved in mind At the same time as selecting the right Android powered Tablet is the dimensions of the Tablet.

3. The real Android operating system

Like iOS, several variations of the Android running gadget are also available. Most of these variations of Android have their very own set of functions. Beginning from the very first version of Android, i.e., Android 1.5 (Cup Cake), there are eight more variations available. The most lately released model of Android is the Android 4.4 (Package Kat). It’s far completely the client’s choice that which model of Android he/ she needs in his/ her Tablet. As a result, their Pill may be appearing All the functions which might be presented within the scope of that particular model of Android.

Furthermore, there are certain packages as well as video games which are unique to each version and them’ll/ may not be upgradable to the higher ones. For this reason, each consumer must be cautious While buying a Tablet with Android 2.three or underneath. The reason in the back of this is that these versions do not add Flash. It’s far advised to pick the ideal version of Android accurately. This can be achieved based totally on the person’s preferences as well as the reasons behind shopping for a Pill.

4. The right producer

Searching at the popularity and fan following of Android pills Within the market, there are few very doubtlessly great Tablet producers In the virtual global today. The dilemma arises due to the fact each of those pills is well worth setting your arms on. Manufacturers like Sony, Google, Samsung, and so on have emerged as similarly effective providers of Android-powered tablets Within the world.

But, it could now not be that difficult to pick among those capsules. The purpose in the back of this is that every of those producers has some extra features and may characteristic otherwise as well. As a result, the most effective way to 0 in on any Android Pill is by way of being certain approximately the capabilities and specs which you expect to be there on your Tablet.

5. What’s your price range?

The fee of an Android Pill relies upon on the model of the Android running gadget installed in addition to the functions supplied by using it. The various factors which contribute In the very last price of a Pill consist of the working system, features, constructed, layout, software as well as the dimensions. While smaller drugs are in reality less expensive than the bigger ones, it completely relies upon at the consumer’s requirements and budget.

6. Does your Tablet connect to the Android marketplace?

Unluckily, not every Android powered Tablet can be linked to the net Android marketplace. That is due to the fact Google does no longer have tons manage on Android. As soon as a new edition of Android is launched to the loads, there’s nothing that Google can do. But Google certainly has the manage over the entire Android marketplace. As a result, older versions of Android including Android 2.2 and underneath will in no way connect with the Android market. Absolute confidence a few apps might be available to you. However, most people of application apps and video games can be a long way out of your attain.

You should be thinking approximately the significance of buying an Android Pill if you can’t have to get right to entry to All the apps and video games Inside the Android market. Therefore, this is another essential thing to be kept in mind At the same time as shopping for any Android powered Tablet.

7. capsules may additionally/ won’t require a data plan

All Android pills can be both bought with c084d04ddacadd4b971ae3d98fecfb2a connectivity or with 3G/ 4G wireless information get right of entry to. Frequently it’s far visible that those pills are sold at a discount fee due to their collaboration with any cell service provider. Earlier than making an investment in any Android Pill, check in case you are protected beneath the two years of charge over the charge for which you are buying your Tablet. Also, take a look at the quantity of data that you may be supplied below this plan. It is always cautioned to go for a project that is expandable in future.

8. Say no to Modified Androids

Just like the changes added in Android user interfaces in distinct devices by their manufacturers, modifications can be delivered in Android pills as well. Often producers kingdom that it is an incredible aspect, However, it Also has a few dangers.

The disadvantage is that these Changed versions frequently act otherwise from their actual variations. This will pose a terrible state of affairs for people the usage of the Modified version of Android. As a result, you should always go for the actual and unique version of Android.

Making an investment Inside the proper Android Pill is simply a hard selection to make. However, when you invest Within the good Pill, there can be no Searching returned for you.

Chrome Add-ons Uplift Your Ride With no trouble

With all of the fuss being made about the bigger customizing projects on the docket, drivers need to be reminded approximately the “little matters” each from time to time to get them returned heading in the right direction. Not every aftermarket addition needs to be financial institution-breaking, especially at some stage in this uncertain economic climate. Chrome Accessories are an absolute treasure for those who are wishing to explore their Trip’s flashier fact without swiping their plastic down to a nub. Not only is chrome trim value-powerful, however it additionally adds a pleasing flourish of sophistication to most any Journey very, right away. Every automobile ought to use a touch of chrome right here or there to provide it a little side. Accordingly, it all comes all the way down to finding out where to place the Chrome Accessories that make the sharp distinction you’re searching out.

A Brief Chrome Trim Assessment

What is chrome trim? Simply what it seems like. Kind of. Chrome trim refers to a broad range of merchandise which are either chrome-plated or lined in chrome. Those merchandises are comprised of chrome steel or excessive yielding ABS plastic with chrome introduced on later. As you can believe, chrome steel chrome pieces are always in demand, but there are numerous quality offerings of ABS plastic trimmings that get the activity completed as correctly. Considered one of the chrome’s largest strengths is its versatility. Sort of like wearing black, white, or beige, chrome is going with the whole lot. So there’s no need to fear approximately a “healthy.” This is One in all its maximum pleasing characteristics for the ones of us whom out of doors of our automobile dreams are “fashionably challenged.” We are probably unsure as to what coloration tie is going with a mild-blue get dressed shirt, but we have an idea what seems correct on our automobiles. And Chrome Add-ons fit that invoice entirely. No matter the color scheme of your road burner, chrome trim has a feverish tendency to either mixture in the information or stand out with stark radiance. It Just all relies upon on what you’re going for.

In case you power a Cadillac CTS for instance, your chrome accessory goals is probably extraordinary from someone who sits in the back of a Honda Accord. And someone who rides a Chevy Silverado in all likelihood has one of a kind values than a person who controls a Ward off Challenger. The outdoors packaging of your automobile has to have a say in in which you make a decision to location your accents. Chrome Accessories are there to beautify your car’s personality and draw extra life out of it. You do not need to Just make up places to cowl with chrome. But some of this legwork is thankful, taken from your fingers. Chrome Accessories are available in unique styles and sizes, every designed to define a selected place of your Journey.

  Pillar Posts & Reflect Covers

While you first pay attention the term “support posts,” if strange you may anticipate a log or pole That is keeping up a few kind of widespread shape. In the end, that’s what a pillar is. But support posts are genuinely extraordinarily famous portions of chrome trim that adhere to the spacing among the windows of your doorways. Rather than sealant (ugh) or the original frame colour supplying the distance between your aspect-view windows, pillar posts unveil a dynamic brushstroke of gleaming chrome-plated stainless-steel. While accomplished at the proper car or truck; support posts offer an entirely different distinction to the rest of the exterior. Many vehicles are “mounted” with chrome pillar posts at automobile suggests and exhibitions mostly because they elicit this kind of visually stimulating image.

Any other hot commodity is chrome Replicate covers. Reflect covers are perhaps one of the other necessary chrome improvements due to the fact they play a vital role in upping the style on What’s a very underestimated a part of your vehicle. On occasion, it’s miles even tough for me to apprehend how human beings do not see this! Your aspect-view mirrors stick out! They may be the only part of your automobile’s frame That is undoubtedly 3-d always. Why such a lot of drivers neglect them, I’ll in no way understand. To me, they’re my favored area to add some glare, and are the primary issue I search for once I see a car This is supposedly “customized.” I advocate into Chrome Reflect covers for your beast right away.

Door Handles & Window Visors

We’re going to hold rolling right alongside and examine two more prized Chrome Accessories, and those are door handles and window visors. Chrome door handles are a delightfully smooth way to spruce things up in a hurry and add a sprinkle of luxury in your doorways. If you’re vying for a few more interest, so to speak, then chrome door handles are an excellent concept. Like maximum Chrome Accessories, door handles Simply stick right on, and are prepared to go in moments. Alternatively, we have chrome window visors. Chrome window screens provide greater than only a few more shine. Chrome window screens offer solid safety in opposition to rain and snow coming down off of your roof and impeding your vision. Many drivers enjoy chrome window visors because it’s miles a -for-one Sort of deal. They get to toss a few flash onto their Ride with the gain of ratcheting up their using protection. It’s miles a “win-win” situation.

Chrome Trim = Alternatives

Nowadays, there are countless avenues drivers can explore. Taillight bezels, fender trim, fuel caps, hood accents, and pedals are all possible Alternatives for even the savviest of auto clients. Any one of these items can open the floodgates of custom fashion in your model, and you shouldn’t take that lightly. Chances are, you have notion approximately going with a bit of chrome plated steel or ABS at one factor or Every other. Chrome Add-ons are almost all very cheaper and easy to put in. Maximum respectable chrome trim producers, like Putco® or QAA, consist of specialized 3M adhesive backings on each chrome product. That is a large advantage, as this automotive adhesive lets in for lightening-speedy set up as well as concrete fitment that lasts longer than you will even own your car. As a reply on fact, maximum, if Not all of those Chrome Add-ons come supported by means of warranties to this impact.

There are so that many distinct approaches to get innovative for nearly all make and models that no motive force have to be left behind While looking for the style that suits them most. Chrome gives you the capability to make a luxury Trip appear even extra stylish and help a racing version mirror even greater aggression. Or indeed increase your “everyday” family sedan into a blustery new international of custom enjoyment. It does not remember what sort of avenue warrior you are. Perhaps you don’t aspire to dazzle your Experience up sufficient to go into it at SEMA. However, all people has a reason why they love their vehicle and want it to strut around in all its glory. Deciding on the proper Chrome Add-ons on your car is an excellent manner to rediscover what turned into so unique about it inside the first vicinity.

Timothy J. arms is an Author/Editor for CARiD.Com; the quickest-developing Automobile Accessories keep on the internet. Take a look at them out nowadays and get a feel for their pinnacle-first-class line of Chrome Accessories, Chrome Pillar Posts, and other shimmering portions of Chrome Trim that supply glittering consequences to each car!

The way to – Motorcycle Chroming and Chrome Healing

Chromium is a high blue, white steel, has an incredible luster used as a plating on other metals. Chrome bumpers, vehicle body trim, motorcycles, bicycles, Boats rigging’s, Bathtub and tapware in addition to heaps of kitchen appliances are all examples of chrome plating.

The chrome is a suppose layer defensive a much thicker layer of Nickel, which makes Chrome appear Silver. Certainly, it’s no longer always smooth to tell chrome plating from other finishes if the objects aren’t sided with the aid of aspect. When a beautiful chrome electroplated finish sits right after every other vibrant finish, however, the opposite end generally might not examine very favorably.

Chrome may be restored to a beautiful luster and shine. Here’s a few what to and what now not to that will help you make your chrome shine like the specialists.

  Clean your chrome first

usually wash in sudsy water. Rinse and wipe to repair the shine

Don’t scour your chrome

Never use abrasive cleaners, wine wall, sandpaper or cleaning pads to improve your Chrome as it will scratch and stupid the surface revealing the Nickel underneath. If your chrome is scored or worn back to Nickel or bare steel, you may need to take it to a reputable chrome plating shop there see beneath.

Make floor rust spots disappear in seconds!

If your chrome has surface rust marks attempt the usage of kitchen foil dampened with Coke, the rust will go earlier than your eyes! If your element has an excessive amount of rust or the rust has eaten into the chrome and even the metal below you’ll need to take it to a reputable chrome plating store – see list under.

Eliminate grease and filth in seconds

Attempt using the soft cloth dipped in undiluted White Vinegar or Cider Vinegar to repair your chrome. For worse deposits of oil of gummy residue soak in a bucket or small bath, Get rid of and rub with a cloth, or paper towel.

The way to Put off swirl marks

After you have got wiped clean your chrome, if it is hazy, has swirl marks or residue try using a smooth fabric and baking soda or Lime to coloration it and shine. Flower works nicely too.

Baby Oil can give your Chrome a Show Glow!

Toddler oil can also be used to get your chrome shining! Put some on a soft cloth and varnish to glow. Make certain you polish the residue off to restriction it’s potential to draw dirt and dust.

Cloth softener sheets can even work wonders on chrome!

Use new or used Fabric softener sheets to repair the chrome-plated furniture on your lavatory and kitchen. The chrome will sparkle like new!

Use a professional Chrome Polish and Restorer

There are some excellent finishes made especially for chrome. In case you can’t locate any locally attempt searching on Google for Chrome Polish.

Getting your chrome restored by an expert chrome plating save

In case you nevertheless cannot get the arena magnificence shine your seeking out, visit a good chrome plating or chroming enterprise. They’ll strip your old chrome, polish up your parts to a faultless replicate and then deliver it a triple coat of copper, nickel, and chrome giving your part that Display like end you’re searching out. Getting your chrome paintings re-plated earlier than it receives too eroded using the factors in the key to getting a great re-plating end. Despite the fact that many Chroming stores will take your rusty, worn-out and eroded chrome paintings regularly higher than no longer the very last effects can now and again be displeasing. Chrome Plating is a technological know-how to its personal. Any no matter what number of coats of copper or chrome they apply chemical reactions as a result of oxidization deep within the metal from letting the chrome paintings visit ways can cause all varieties of dirty pics to your completed results. If you want terrible consequences to get, your chrome paintings re-accomplished as quickly because it begins to vanish and earlier than the rest takes to preserve.