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saphirered · 4 years ago

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HI, Its me again! I was wondering if you could kinda do a another part of the Eldritch Knight fic. Something like some more scenarios of essek fanboying over reader? ( Watching reader save a bunch of civilians by catching/lifting up a HUGE boulder that was about to crush the civilians, out smarting a evil wizard, helping essek with a spell he couldn't get right?) Sorry if this is long! Do whatever you want with this and I hope you have an amazing day ( pls drink some water!)

Hya! I hope you like this one and sorry it took so long (Hope the word count makes up for that part 😝). I tried to incorporate as many of these aspects as I could and keep it consistent so I hope it worked and you like the outcome. Thanks and have an amazing day yourself and stay hydrated! 😘

“So what is it about this spell that’s so difficult? You’ve never had any trouble transcribing spells in the past.” You walk beside Essek as you go down the street, or float in his case.

It’s a lovely evening in Asarius, the darkness of night a necessity to those sensitive to sunlight. The City of Beasts leaves much to be desired, especially compared to Rosohna to which it doesn’t even hold a candle but it’s a nice evening no less and you get to spend more time with your favourite Shadowhand wizard so you’re not complaining.

“I don’t have any trouble transcribing spells. If I did, I’d seriously question your faith in me and my credibility as a praised magic user prodigy.” You smile at the last part. Whereas to anyone else those words may have pinged as arrogance and an ego beyond a healthy standard, you clearly hear a slight gulp and sense of defensiveness to his wording, a sense of doubt.

“Essek, if anything your capabilities have spoken for themselves. As a humble student of Dunamis with a limited understanding of the beauty of the craft even I can say so. I don’t question your skills.” From the corner of your eye you can almost see him let out a breath of relieve as you continue.

“However, I must question your sanity slightly for willingly coming to Asarius. What is it you so desperately need you couldn’t get in Rosohna and don’t get me wrong, I like spending time with you, but why am I here?” A smile creeps onto his face but quickly turns neutral at the realisation you’re in a public space with watching eyes all around. You understand.

“I’m in the process of creating a new spell of my own device. I’ve run out of materials and bought up the last of the stock in Rosohna, which I’ve also already gone through. Now why I asked you to come along, I cannot carry everything on my own and do not trust the careless hands of guards and servants to properly handle such delicate materials with proper consideration and gentleness.”

“Oh, so you need me to look pretty and flex so you can ogle and admire me again? You should have just asked. I’d happily let you watch another sparring session or training. The company would be much more selective and you wouldn’t need to fight to keep that expression on your face like your life depended on it.” You try to whisper in all seriousness but can’t help some giggles cracking your voice. Essek’s eyes go wide for a second and the faintest blush creeps onto his cheeks, something he cannot hide. He quickly glances to the left and right to make sure no one’s noticed. Luckily no one did.

“Perhaps you could save such proclamations in more private company… for my sake…” The last part he speaks under his breath but you can still just barely hear the words.

You finally find the shop. Essek immediately approaches the person behind the counter as you look around. There are some magical items placed on what once may have been plush velvet pillows but the velvet is crushed in places. The glass displays show finger prints and dust and grime at the corners, not properly cleaned for a long time. The wooden floor is sticky in some places and this is one of those moments where you wish you could float like Essek. You browse while he finishes up.

While you browse and get to one of the larger displays another customer at the display next to, still quite some space away from you suddenly moves away to an entirely different display case on the other side of the room. Weird. You glance over but don’t think anything serious of it but keep an eye out regardless.

Essek signals for you he’s done and on the counter you see several huge stacks of paper and an the equivalent of a bucket worth of ink in several bottles. Mentally figuring out how you’re going to carry this much, not because of the weight but solely the awkward size and shape of the stacks of paper you undo your cloak and begin to stack up the paper in one large stack onto the centre of your cloak and one smaller stack, compared to the bigger one that is, that you put to the side. The shopkeeper offers you some twine rope to keep the pages secure in their stack. and you begin folding your cloak around the bigger stack so it’s fully covered. You take the corners and tie them securely in a knot around your waist while using the closure ties to cross them over your chest and around your back where they tie. A makeshift backpack but secure and safe in a way the paper won’t get damaged. You grab the remaining stack from the counter and carry it in your arms.

“You carry the ink. Let’s not risk it spilling over the paper or this will all have been for nothing.” Essek picks up the ink and you let him take the lead out of the shop holding the door open with a quick mage hand. Outside you walk side by side once more.

You see Essek side glance you several times but you’re unsure whether it’s because he’s making sure you’re not falling behind, you’re doing alright, if the paper isn’t getting damaged or simply watch the defined flexing muscles of your arms and shoulders as you walk, unbothered by the weight of what could by far exceed a person’s weight in materials.

You’re nearing the Aurora Hold, your way back to Rosohna when you see something from the corner of your eye; the same person you saw in the shop… they’re sticking to the shadows moving from building to building and blending into the crowd when possible to avoid detection, their eyes trained on you or more like Essek. Essek seems to have caught on to the person trailing you too.

“We’re being followed.” Essek states under his breath so only you can hear.

“That we are. Same person as from the shop. What’s the plan?” You say back, the both of you acting none the wiser to your stalker.

“Get to the Hold. Aurora Watch will be more present the closer we get. They’re less likely to try anything in the open.” He floats along eyes trained on your destination. Though, he doesn’t sound too sure about it stalling whatever your follower is planning.

You glance around briefly having lost track of them but find them picking up pace towards you. Deciding not to wait and see what’s coming next you move the heavy stack of paper over balancing it on your lower arm, between your hand and body while grabbing Essek’s arm with your now free one, you pick up pace and run pulling him along with you as you push people aside and weave through them for the quickest path to the Aurora Hold.

“Let’s hope your right.” You tell Essek as the person follows behind you picking up pace as well. By passing and pushing through certain people you manage to make it more difficult for them to follow and hope to draw enough attention from the Aurora Watch or really anyone bothered enough to pick a fight so the stalker will lose interest or opportunity. Casting anything major right here is a big no go with the amount people in the street and you’re still too far away for anything targeted specifically towards them. Luckily for you, they’re in the same boat when it comes to targeting the two of you yet you’re hoping they’re not stupid enough to cause severe collateral damage.

You’re approaching the square to the Aurora Hold and see more guards. You shout for one of them to stop as they pass by you and hand them the stack of paper in your one arm, the guard buckles under the weight as you untie the fastenings of your cloak and then the one around your waist setting it down besides them. The Aurora Hold is still aways away on the other side of the square and with how busy it is you’d never make it there without them catching up.

“What are you doing?” Essek asks you as he shushes the guard. The guard recognises Essek’s station and immediately obeys his command.

“We’re not going to make it in time. Not without them getting to us first. Confrontation it is.” You take out your sword and toss the sheath to the side. Essek nods and tells the guard to get call reinforcements to subtly clear the square as much as possible. Luckily conflicts and fights in the open in Asarius are about as common as the rain falling from the sky so no one will bother to get in the middle of this.

You take place a few steps in front of Essek to the side and wait. Both of you keep an eye on your chaser watching them draw closer as you stay put. Once within range Essek attempts to cast hold person on them but it fails.

You can see their eyes narrow as they continue to approach determined. They take out some components and begin casting a spell before you can do anything a bright streak fires from their finger. You manage to dodge into a dive roll avoiding most of the impact but others around you weren’t so lucky. Essek barely managed to get out of the brunt of it too. The buildings and watchtower to your side have begun to catch fire. The people who managed to get out of the explosion quickly begin dragging people out of the way to safety clearing the way between you and the person.

“Worry about your paper. I got this.” You look at Essek over your shoulder who manages to quench the flames of your cloak protecting the precious paper. You twirl your sword twice to feel the familiar balance and pull of gravity you’ve grown accustomed to.

Approaching the caster after you and Essek you keep a safe distance between you and them. At least, as safe as it can be when someone is clearly capable of some ranged attacks.

“I’ve nothing against you. Get out of my way so I can finish my job and I might let you live.” You hear the faintest hint of a Zemnian accent. Volstrucker. Great. Now you’re dealing with an assassin.

“Sorry. Not gonna happen. Go back to wherever you came from and tell your superiors to stay away and I’ll let you live. If you don’t, I’ll make sure your remains will be returned to your next of kin for a proper burial instead of being fed to the moorbounders.” They step closers to you and you step back keeping the same amount of distance between you.

“How very kind of you. I think I’ll pass.” They sneer. You take that as your cue and run close sword swinging. They manage to deflect the first blow with a shield spell but the second one strikes true and sends them off their feet. They get up quickly and send a firebolt your way but you’re quick enough to avoid that one. You swing again and hit their side, coming around with a second hit you step in close and use your momentum to shift to the side and swipe at their legs sending them to the ground once more.

A blade apparates in their hand, getting up they slash at you. You try to block the first blow but it still hits cutting across your shoulder. The second hit comes for the side of your leg. You have no way of deflecting this one so you take it and use the opportunity to elbow them in the face, sweeping their feet from under them. They look up to you blood beginning to stream out of their nose.

“Why don’t you just help me? You seem friendly enough. I could use an ally right now.” They speak in a sweet voice, trying to cast some kind of charm on you and you feel it take in your brain but fight it off. You’re not so easily charmed. You stab down through their abdomen and they cry out in pain. Removing your blade the Aurora Watch rushes over to the two of you and you take a step back. People fill back into the square to see what happened and you walk back over to Essek.

You let the Watch deal with the assassin as you inspect the paper covered by your cloak. The cloak is partially scorched but the paper survived.

“You know, when you said sometimes people send assassins after you and they occasionally manage to make it past defences I thought you were joking.” Essek gives you a deadpanned expression.

“I wish I was. My apologies. I should have been more careful and many thanks for valiantly protecting my life and my materials. I do not think I could have wished for a more capable and amazing protector.” You give him a wink.

The conversation is cut short by ruckus from the Aurora Watch and the assassin. The assassin is fighting back and manages to cast a spell aimed at Essek. You’re quick enough to cast the resilient sphere spell on Essek providing a shimmering protective barrier around him. A second attack from the assassin goes wide and strikes the burning watchtower.

The watchtower begins to fall overhead. Thinking quickly to keep yourself, the guards and the people having gathered around from being crushed by a flaming building you hold your sword horizontal above your head, take out your gold dust and throw it into the air onto the sword and speak the words. You let go of the sword and duck down yelling for everyone to do the same. As a reflex you use your arms to protect yourself from the impact but the impact never came.

You feel the scorching heat of the flames and looking up you see the burning watchtower stationary in the air balanced on your sword high above your head. Quickly rushing out from under. You see the assassin trying to get one final attempt the protective sphere around Essek gone. You grab a dagger from the belt of one of the nearby guards and toss it at the assassin. The dagger strikes true and the target drops.

Walking up to Essek you reach down to the fallen assassin, twist the blade and pull it out dropping it to the side.

“Told you to leave while you still could. No second chances.” You mutter as you look over Essek.

“Are you alright?” You ask Essek whose gaze is trained on you. He’s covered in soot and ash greys his usually pristine white hair but seems otherwise unharmed. He didn’t have time to react and retaliate the attempt made by the assassin.

“I seem to once again have you to thank for saving my life. You are absolutely magnificent. Your clever use of your resources is unrivalled. As is your care and willingness to protect those around you. You truly are an angel in disguise.” He composes himself brushing the gathered ash from his cloak as the guards and people work to heal the wounded and quench the fires. You pick up the wrapped stack of paper and look at Essek.

“Let’s go inside and get your paper secure and safe away from the scorching heat. I want my sword back once they’re done or the spell ends and they have another solution.” You begin leading the way to the Aurora Hold but stop until Essek catches up to you.

“And you can keep those compliments coming. I’ll consider them payment for saving your life twice? On this day alone? How many is that total now?” You give him a wink and blow him a kiss as you watch the all too familiar blush come back on his cheeks as his back straightens and you continue on your way side by side.

#critical role x reader #mighty nein x reader #essek thelyss x reader #critrole x reader #essek x reader

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kissjane · 5 years ago

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DANGER TO MY HEART / Short fic!

For the anonymous Davenzi shipper requesting all the dangerous prompts - let me know if you liked it!

#33 from this prompt list.

33. Everyone thinks I should stay away from you because you’re dangerous

“Dude, you’re staring at him again.”

Jonas punched Matteo’s shoulder hard, and ignored Matteo’s surprised yelp.

“Yeah, well,” Matteo shrugged. It wasn’t the first time Jonas caught him staring at David Schreibner, and it wouldn’t be the last, either. David Schreibner was the hottest guy on campus, by popular agreement, and the hottest guy in all of Berlin, if you asked Matteo.

“He’s no good, Luigi,” Jonas scoffed.

Matteo knew the rumours going around. David Schreibner was supposed to be a bad boy, dangerous even. Nobody knew anything about him, he hardly spoke, had no friends. People said he had been in juvenile prison, or a mental hospital – which Matteo didn’t think was an appropriate subject to tattle about, if it was true. There was even some hushed gossip about him murdering his parents. Obviously, that was just spread by somebody trying to be dramatic. A murderer would not be walking around campus being all dark and handsome. Not to say David Schreibner didn’t look the part, dressed in all black, his nose ring glinting in the sun, never smiling.

Matteo glanced over again.

He jolted when his gaze connected straight with David Schreibner. He lowered his eyes immediately, thinking he must have imagined it, but when he cautiously looked up again, David Schreibner was still looking straight at Matteo. He felt a blush starting to creep up towards his cheeks, and he sat transfixed, not able to look away until Jonas punched him again, even harder than before.

“Stop staring at him! There are hundreds of hot boys around, pick one of them to crush upon. Schreibner is dangerous.”

Matteo tore his eyes away from the gorgeous sight in front of him, and hummed noncommittally at Jonas’ words. First of all, there weren’t hundreds of good-looking boys on campus. Maybe a dozen or so, but even then, nobody could hold a candle to David Schreibner. Not that it mattered, because David Schreibner was way out of Matteo’s league – if he even liked boys to start with. Although – Matteo risked a quick glance again – David Schreibner was still staring at him. Jonas noticed too, and threw the other boy a murderous look, before he stood.

“I have class now, but I’m serious. Stay away from Schreibner, Luigi, please.”

Matteo nodded at Jonas, but his eyes wandered over almost as if they had a will of their own. Jonas scoffed again, but seemed to think there was nothing more he could do, and left for class, leaving Matteo to his work.

Matteo opened up his research book, and set about to finish his essay so he could stop worrying about it. He couldn’t help himself, though – he could almost feel a pair of dark eyes on him, and he looked up and connected with David Schreibner again. He stared openly at the boy. Tanned skin. Curly hair. Dark eyes, with long eyelashes. Matteo wished he could watch from closer by, see how the lashes fluttered on the boy’s cheek as he closed his eyes, check out how many hues were hidden in those dark pools.

He broke the contact first, feeling all flustered about the direction his thoughts were going, and tried to focus on his books.

Not that it worked – his mind kept wandering to the other boy, even though Matteo kept his eyes firmly on his essay.

Suddenly, a shadow fell over him, and somebody sat down on the chair Jonas had occupied earlier.

Matteo looked up, and saw the myriad of sparkles in the eyes he’d been admiring before. He noticed something different, though – a faint blush on the olive skin, a half-smile on the plush red lips.

“Hi,” David Schreibner said, sounding a bit unsure. “I’m David.”

“I know,” Matteo replied, slightly star-struck.

“Uhm,” David hedged, “What’s your name?”

“Oh!”

Matteo felt like a complete idiot.

“It’s Matteo, uh, Matteo Florenzi.”

The smile on David’s face widened, and Matteo was transfixed. He could die right there and then, watching David Schreibner smile. His eyes lit up, his face glowed, and Matteo was certain there couldn’t be a less dangerous person on earth than David Schreibner. Mysterious David was hot. This David was hot, and cute – no, adorable.

They sat for a minute, staring at each other, in silence. Then Matteo spoke up.

“Did you want anything?”

David seemed to startle, and began talking, rushing out the words.

“I, uh, I noticed you sitting here and I – well, I just thought you looked gorgeous so I thought I’d – I mean, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable or anything – fuck.”

The blush on his cheeks deepened, and his eyes flitted all over the table, avoiding Matteo’s gaze.

Matteo’s smile grew incredibly wider. David Schreibner was shy. David Schreibner just called Matteo gorgeous. David Schreibner was here, talking to Matteo, smiling.

It felt like an impossible dream, and Matteo sneakily pinched his arm, almost mewling at the sharp pain. No dream, then. Or all his dreams come true, in the form of one delectable boy.

Matteo decided to go for broke.

“Do you want to get some coffee with me? Like, right now?”

David looked up, his big brown eyes boring into Matteo’s.

“You mean, like – like a… a date?”

Matteo laughed.

“Yes. I mean, if you want.”

Wordlessly, David nodded. Matteo started to put his stuff in his backpack while David waited, and they walked over to David’s table to collect David’s things.

As they left the library together, Matteo felt all eyes on them, and he could hear some furtive whispering behind their backs. He couldn’t care less, but David seemed to hunch down his shoulders a bit when somebody said quite loudly ‘Is that David Schreibner? I’ve never seen him with anybody else before!’.

Matteo leaned over to David.

“Wanna give them something to really talk about?”, he asked, slyly.

David looked at him, eyes big and questioning.

Matteo took a deep breath and grabbed David’s hand, tugging him along. He paid no attention to the gasps echoing through the library, or the eyes burning on his back.

He was going on a date with the softest, hottest boy on campus. So let them stare, he thought. He had something much better to stare at.

#I write things #Davenzi #prompted #all the davenzi shipping anons #50 cliché prompts

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sserpente · 6 years ago

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It had been two months now since Loki had randomly crashed into your garden and into your life. The God of Mischief had landed right on top of your now destroyed salad plants. You would have been upset if, and now that was the odd part, you didn’t know that Loki wasn’t but most importantly one thing: namely fictional.

A/N: So many of you wanted Loki to end up with the Reader after he escapes with the Tesseract. Well, I decided to spice things up a bit. Besides, I got very inspired at the Prater in Vienna two weeks ago.

Words: 1946 Warnings: fluff, AVENGERS ENDGAME SPOILERS

“Tell me again why we are doing this in the singeing heat?” Loki remarked sarcastically when you entered the amusement park. You let out a relieved breath, stepping into the shadow of the nearby information counter and pulled out two full water bottles from your rucksack, one of which you handed to Loki. He took it greedily, drinking up almost half of it right away.

You blinked, paralysed for a moment as you watched his thin lips closing around it. He was gulping so thirstily you could see his Adam’s apple bop with very sip. He really was outrageously handsome.

It all made sense though, no? You had seen Avengers Endgame. Loki had snuffled the Tesseract and disappeared into a different dimension. And this dimension just so happened to be yours, in which the MCU was no more but a collection of fictional stories.

Naturally, the look on Loki’s face had been priceless when you told him things about his life not even Frigga knew… but eventually, he built something like trust. You were not quite sure whether it was the fact you had a Loki pillow you slept on every night or simply that you had told him that he was your favourite character and that you understood him in a way Thor never would. The latter you had said not only because it was the truth but also because he had intimidated and scared you a little when he first entered your house.

Then… you had ended up befriending him, a fictional character that happened to be not so fictional after all; and even… even beginning to fall in love with him. That was the confusing bit. Was he really? Real? What if you woke up one day and he had simply disappeared? While he had confirmed to you almost insulted he was indeed very real, another concern remained. What about Tom Hiddleston? They were technically the same person. Loki sure looked like him and he had been pretty amazed when you had told him about his actor’s existence.

Now here you were, introducing Loki to Midgardian life and fun activities so he could take his mind off things and until he had figured out what he’d do next. You dreaded the day he would leave you again, for you doubted he would consider taking you with him—so you enjoyed and cherished it for as long as it was going to last.

“We can go swimming after. But this is the last day the amusement park is in town. It’s fun, you’ll love it.”

“That is what you said when you made me try raw fish wrapped in dry seaweed.” He complained.

“Sushi. It’s called sushi. Come on, let’s go and do a rollercoaster first!” Excitedly, you pointed at one of the metal constructions. Loki slowly shook his head when he spotted it, watching one of the carriages go by with people inside screaming.

“Absolutely not. You go, I shall hold your bag for you.”

But you tried. You really tried. Every ride you got on, you attempted to convince him to join you but Loki was stubborn. At some point, you even wondered if maybe he was afraid of heights but that he had almost rudely dismissed.

You were about to give up when you spotted the ghost train on the right hand side—eerie skeletons hanging out of broken windows and a pair of yellow glowing eyes looking through an open door leading to a pitch-black cabin… and a terrifying laughter coming from inside the haunted house.

Confidently, you reached for his hand and dragged him towards it. But Loki would not move an inch. Instead, his blue eyes were fixed on something else entirely. Confused, he tilted his head. There was a girl queuing up for one of those scary sling shot rides—nothing special about her, really. But one thing caught his attention. She was carrying a Loki backpack.

You doubted it would be a good idea for him to simply walk over and say hello—and even though you felt rather proud your words proved to be true and Loki indeed had an army in this dimension, you somehow wanted to have the God of Mischief all to yourself.

“A most peculiar piece of luggage.” Loki noted, studying the golden horns attached to the green backpack. “I rather like it. Not as much as your collection of ‘t-shirts’ but it pleases me. Just how…” He trailed off, making you frown.

“How what?”

Loki smirked. A bitter smirk, failing to hide the pain burning in his heart. “It still feels much unusual to have… genuine supporters.”

That it did and it broke your heart he felt such incredulity about it.

“You have no idea, Trickster. I’m gonna have to introduce you to Tumblr sometime…” You mumbled.

“Whatever that is…” He replied, turning back to you as if he wanted to forget his thoughts and concerns. “What next?”

“Will you at least do the ghost train with me?” You asked, pointing at the haunted house.

“Define that.”

“You sit in a carriage that’s slowly moving in the dark and there’s creepy things installed jumping out to scare you.”

“That sounds absurd.”

“Pretty please? We can get some candy after.” You tempted him. Loki raised his brows. Now you had him. He really was a sweet tooth, this much you had found out already. His favourite was chocolate of course—all kinds of it, really. But you were dying to introduce him to candy floss. Besides, if you got him to join you on the ghost train, you had a legal excuse to cuddle up against him and hide your face in his chest.

Loki sighed. “Very well. But if I am going to regret this, you will pay the price, little mortal.” You knew he was joking. The playful tone in his voice made your heart jump and your knickers grow wet. Swallowing thickly, you approached the counter of the ghost train and purchased two tickets.

Only a few moments later you were both sat in one of the carriages. You jumped when it started to move inside the haunted house with a loud rumbling—and it was then you wrapped your arms around Loki’s middle already.

It was the first time he allowed this much body contact. Loki craved the attention, yet still acted very restrained around you. He chuckled when the first ‘monster’ jumped out from the dark and made you squeal.

“They are puppets.” He stated after two more jumpscares he was seemingly very unimpressed with. “Harmless puppets, darling.” Darling. That nickname alone had been worth it to persuade Loki to do this with you. And then, suddenly… you felt his arm around you, pulling even closer. Never before had you felt this protected and safe.

You were almost disappointed when the ride was over and you both had to climb out of the carriage again once you returned to proper daylight.

“If you are so scared of ghost trains, then why do you pay money for them?”

You shrugged. “That’s the point, really. It’s funny to get scared because you know it’s not real and then you laugh after. It’s fun.”

“Strange little mortal.” He teased playfully. “Now… as for my candy?”

You grinned. “Have you ever heard of candy floss?” Loki shook his head slowly. “It’s… well, you’ll see.”

Excited, you returned to the market stands, one of which also sold candy floss. His eyes soon widened when he spotted the fluffy clouds on sticks displayed in different colours of the rainbow.

“Which colour?”

“Green.”

“I thought so. The flavour will be green apple, is that alright?”

He nodded. Fascinated, he watched how the lady behind the counter made a fresh one for him after you paid her and finally, handed it to him. Greedily, he took it and dug his fingers into the soft sugar mixture. Only the blinking of an eye later, he had already shoved some of it into his mouth.

“So?” You asked with a smirk, reaching for the candy floss to taste it yourself.

“It melts on the tongue… delicious.” And he ate the whole thing in almost no time, throwing the wooden stick into a nearby bin. Well… he was a God. You chuckled.

“I’m glad you liked it.” You only wished he would look at you this longingly.

Maybe one more ride now and then you would take him swimming… it was still boiling hot and you feared you’d come down with a sunburn if you didn’t take a break soon to apply some sunscreen.

“Is that…” Once again, Loki stopped. This time, in front of another stand. A colourful one, with a striped roof reminding you of the circus. Inside, there countless plush toys waiting to be won. Your gaze followed his, causing you to gasp.

“Plush toys! Yes! Of the Avengers! Oh my God… look, they’re so cute! And so big! I want one!”

Loki rolled his eyes playfully. “Well, go and get one then.”

“You can’t buy them, you have to win them by playing the game. I’ll ask if he has a Loki plush toy, too, though.”

“Please…” Loki couldn’t quite decide if he should chuckle or roll his eyes again. He settled for both when you approached the owner of the stand.

“Oh yes!” He heard him say. “You’re lucky. There’s only one left, the Loki ones sell out quickly. But it’s one of the big prizes. You’d have to hit all of the targets to get it.”

Amused, Loki eyed the stand. That was all? Hitting five targets with soft balls? He could do that blindfolded.

“We shall try our luck then,” He tossed in, earning him a bewildered glare from the stand owner. With a little luck he would only think Loki was a really accurate cosplayer. Or he simply didn’t care. Or he hadn’t seen the Marvel movies himself.

Smirking, Loki handed him a fiver from the stack of ‘Midgardian money’, as he called it, and which he seemed to keep in his magical pockets you did not understand the concept of, and confidently reached for the balls in the bowl on the counter. Then, he aimed.

You watched, flabbergasted, amused by his sudden change of heart and somewhat turned on at the very same time as he took no more than forty seconds to get the job done, his muscles flexing in the process. Was it weird you wanted to lick that pale neck? Probably. But probably not.

“Now. The prize?” He mused proudly. You grinned. You doubted that the stand owner had any idea of what had just happened. Grumpily, he hand you the Loki push toy, mumbling something that did not at all sound like “congrats” but more like “fuckers”. You simply ignored him and instead stood on your toes to press a gentle kiss on Loki’s cheek before you took the plush toy with a happy squeal, pressing it to your chest firmly.

“Thank you, Trickster.” Loki smirked in response and winked cheekily.

“You know, as much as I enjoy it, I don’t think I shall ever get used to Midgardians losing their minds over my… what did you call it? ‘Fanmerch’. So… are we going swimming now?”

You giggled, leaning into him. “You really earned it.”

A/N: What do you think of this concept, guys? Of Loki being in ‘our’ dimension? Likey? I honestly think I could have a lot of fun with that in the future.

If you enjoyed this story, I would appreciate so much if you supported me on Kofi! kofi.com/sserpente ♥

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im-robins-bitch · 6 years ago

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Yours | sugardaddy!ash

warnings: implied smut, almost smut, this is sugar daddy ash so 18+ pls

words: 3.6k

this is my first time writing anything like this so feedback is appreciated

Ashton had a soft grip on your butt, holding you in place against his chest. He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead as you wove your fingers through his light chest hair. “Do you want me to get you anything after work doll?” Ashton hummed, making his chest rumble and you nuzzle your head against his shoulder releasing soon you were going to have to shake out of your post-sex haze.

“Mmm...i can’t think of anything” You sighed, watching the way his chest rose and fell with his every breath. The sun was peeking through the curtains, casting a little light into his shadowed bedroom.

“That’s unusual?” Ashton chuckled, “sure you don’t have a fever?” He said, pressing his hand against your forehead.

“Ashton!” You giggled, batting his hand away, “I just haven't seen anything I want is all…” You thought back, trying to even think of the last time you went into town for anything but food, to conjure up the memories of the lively store windows lining the streets of LA.

“How about I surprise you then,” He suggested. You didn’t reply, starting to pull yourself out of his silk sheets and warm embrace.

“I should get going, I’m meeting some of my friends.” You shuffled out of bed, your toes digging into a familiar plush rug. You slowly made your way around his room collecting your clothes ignoring Ashton’s obvious staring as you bent down to pick each item up, wiggling your bum at him as you pulled your panties back up your legs, rolling your eyes at the small rip down one of the sides.

“Are you sure you can’t stay just a bit longer?” Ashton whined, he had pulled himself into the sitting position but he still refused to leave the comfort that his large bed provided.

“You have to get the studio” You reminded running your hands through your hair, trying to calm down the ball of frizz your hair had turned into. You turned to Ashton again, a smile dancing on your lips when you saw the sad pout on his face and his dramatic glare at the alarm clock.

“Bye daddy” You sang, grabbing your phone from the nightstand pressing a kiss to his lips.

He shook his head, trying to suppress a smile “stop calling me that,”

“That isn’t what you were saying a few minutes ago” You grinned, giving him one more lingering kiss to the cheek.

You wished you had stayed a little longer with Ashton.

ou hadn’t been surprised when your friends turned up late, they usually did, but while Jay was spitting apologize and offers to buy you your drink, Corrina showed up as cheerful as ever in her signature cat eye sunglasses and red fur coat laughing at your annoyance “Babe, you should know we’re gonna be late by now, just come later or don’t complain” She was joking, mostly, but you couldn’t help but suck on your teeth.

“I was going to, but I remembered the one time I came late and you didn’t and I had to spend the whole time making it up to you while you gave me the silent treatment” You grumped, crossing your arms and sinking further back into your seat. She only rolled her eyes, shaking her hand at you.

“Because you’re never late, always such a good girl.” She teased making your cheeks turn crimson. Your mind couldn’t help but wander to last night, chills going up your spine as you recalled Ashton in your ear calling you the exact same thing over and over like a prayer.

“How are the holiday's plans going?” You asked Jay trying to get the memory out of your head.

“Amazing, so we have 3 different countries planned, but we’re hoping to have more. Imagine, me, backpacking across the globe, Rob is so amazing did you know he’s done this two times already!” Jay rambled his head resting on Corrina’s shoulder as he dreamily stared at the muffins.

“He probably with his last two boyfriends.” Corinna laughed, “If you come back with dreads I won't forgive you.” Her laughter died as she hit the front of the counter, giving the barista a bright smile as she listed off all three of your orders. You bit back a smile, knowing this was her way of making up for being late although if you pointed it out she would deny it.

“How about you?” Jay asked, “Have you managed to scrape together any holiday plans?”

“Oh, yeah i sorta, figured something out.” You mumbled, chipping away at the nail varnish on your thumb. “I’m going to seoul…”

“What?” Corinna said, spinning around to face you again, lowering her glasses down her nose. “Last week you said you couldn’t even afford a day trip to florida?”

“Corrina!” Jay scolded

“Who are you even going with?” She questioned, “cause no offence but aren't me and jay your only friends.”

“None taken.” you muttered, “I’m going with Ash, he offered and since it’s my dre-”

“You’re still doing that??” Corrina exclaimed, almost knocking out the barrister when he called her name. “I thought that was a joke? Is that actually how you got the money to go to italy with us?”

You looked away from her, deciding to look for a free table instead.

“Wasn’t that two years ago?” Jay asked. You shook your head, surely it hadn’t already been two years since you and Ashon began you started counting the months on your fingers, eyes growing wide when you realised it was true. “Wish my boyfriend would buy me things..” Jay sulked.

Corinna rolled her eyes “What’s the point in having a boyfriend if he doesn't buy you anything. That’s all boys are good for, and they aint even good for that, my girlfriend buys me things all the time, she even lets me borrow her clothes.” Corinna boasted a proud smile on her face as she played with the ring on her finger. ��and she’s not old.” She grinned looking at you like the Cheshire cat “But i suppose some people have to settle for a boyfriend who’s older than the earth itself”

“he’s not my boyfriend and he’s not old.” You pouted, the three of you spotted a table and sunk into the booth, you sitting in the middle of the sofa on your own not feeling like dealing with Corinna’s malting fur today.

“Isn’t it kinda gross though,?” Corrina pondered her eyes lighting up with mischief. “And wrinkly?” She giggled, making Jay snort in response.

“I just said he’s not old, and he’s actually-”

“Oh god, Jay she’s starting to get a taste for old men.”

“For the last time he is not-”

“I know! how about we set you up on a date? what was it you said again- oh yeah someone who could snap you in half that was it right” Jay suggested, as corrina laughed at your description of your type. “I think I know a guy we could even set it up for tomorrow”

“Not happening,” You said chipping at your nail polish again looking down at the table, a light blush on your face. “I just-”

“Come on, you said it yourself, he’s not your boyfriend, he’s probably hooking up with old ladies all the time, one date can’t hurt,” Corrina said, putting her hands together, giving you the best puppy dog eyes she could muster while Jay looked up at you with fluttering lashes and an oversized pout.

The idea of going on a date made your stomach twist in knots, you had always hated dates, nervous beyond repair with new people. You had no desire to be with anyone at the moment, you had Ashton you didn’t need a boyfriend. You opened your mouth about to refuse when you suddenly you pictured Ashton out on a date, a girl running her hands through his dark red hair, you had seen them, in magazines. Pictures of him in clubs surrounded by pretty girls sometimes they made you wonder.

Suddenly you heard Corrina and Jay screaming in delight, talking about planning outfits and how much fun you were going to have and you released you had agreed to go on a date. You were about to tell them you changed your mind when Corinna looked at you with a bright smile “You know what this means, we get to go shopping!” She squealed. You bit down on your straw taking a long sip of ice tea. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad.

You got back home, expecting only to see Maurice curled up on the sofa napping away the day like he always did but instead, you were greeted by Ash, pulling you through your door by your hips, pressing a needy kiss to your lips. You put your hands on his chest pushing him away “what are you doing here? How did you even get in?” You asked, dropping your bag to the floor.

“You left your door unlocked, you really shouldn’t do that doll.” He scolded, nipping at your neck. You bit your lip, you had been in such a rush to see him last night you had completely forgotten “And I remember telling you this morning that I would surprise you”

You grinned, kissing him and grabbing at his shirt, pulling him further into the living room. “Well consider me surprised” You rubbed your nose against his jaw before going forward to kiss him again, but he only moved further away from you a smirk on his face.

“ ‘fraid this isn’t the surprise Doll.” He smiled, grabbing your hands and tugging you through the living room and up the stairs towards the direction of your bedroom “Although I suppose it’s more of a present for Maurice” You raised your eyebrow giggling when he covered your eyes with his hand.

“It better not be a new mattress, I know you hate mine, but i like the springs” You hummed, trying not to trip over the familiar bump in your bedroom carpet.

“No doll it’s not a new mattress,” Ashton’s other hand was still holding onto yours and he gave it a squeeze when he finally uncovered your eyes.

Your eyes scanned around the room when you noticed in the corner of the room was a tall cat tower, shaped exactly like Sleeping Beauty's castle. Your eyes started to water as you rushed towards it, your fingers dancing across the roof. “Where did you get this? I’ve been dreaming of this my entire life” You gushed the familiar castle filling your heart with warmth and nostalgia.

Ashton grinned, crouching down with you throwing his arm over your shoulder squeezing you tight. “I had it made for you, I remembered you talking about it and so-” He was cut off when your body slammed into his, sending him crashing to the floor as you hugged him tightly, covering his face in kisses “thank you, thank you, thank you.” You chanted between kisses. He laughed, wrapping his arms around you.

“Welcome baby” He hummed, he cupped his hands around your face staring deep into your eyes moving to kiss you when your cat jumped onto your head and then to his new castle making you headbutt Ashton.

You both groaned, grabbing your heads in unison. “Are you ok?” Ashton asked.

You nodded “are you?”

Ashton smiled “I think you might need to kiss it better.” You laughed before planting a loud kiss against his forehead. “Still hurts a little I think I need one more.” You kissed him again more softly this time.

You sat up, resting against his large thighs. His hazel eyes sparkled with mischief. He flexed his thigh making you squirm in shock when you got an idea. You wiggled against his lap, shifting when he sat up as well, wrapping your arms around his neck threading your fingers into his hair, tugging on it slightly. “Doll?”

You hummed in response, rolling your hips against his thighs, tugging his hair a little harder this time.

“Baby?” He said again, his hand grasping your cheek pulling you to look at him, a teasing smile tugging at your lips.

“Yeah?” You replied, innocently batting your lashes. “Do you need anything?”

“You know exactly what I need baby.” He growled, his grip on you tightening making your thighs clench.

Your hands uncurled from his neck, trailing down his sides to rest at the waistband of his jeans. Your fingers trailed across the waistband, before landing on his belt. You looked up at Ashton asking for permission when he nodded and your hands grappled with his belt buckle sighing with relief when you finally pulled his belt off, throwing it across the room.

You pulled down his zipper tugging his pants down his thighs. His hands snaked to your hips and he attached his lips to your neck, undoing your pants with ease, dragging them down your legs letting you kick them off. You let out a whimper when he bit down on your sweet spot. He grabbed your ass dragging you closer on his lap squeezing hard.

“A-Ash.” stuttered, as his hand smacked against your ass thrusting you forward.

“Such a good girl for me.” He mumbled against your skin. He dragged his hands up your side only to bring them back down to hook his fingers around the waistband of your panties, slowly dragging them. “Did i rip these doll? Gotta get you something new.”

Your eyes widened, pulling away from his touch. “I-I-I just remembered I need to go and do something.” You sputtered, pulling your panties back up your legs. You looked into his eyes, remembering the girls from the magazines all over him, picturing him running his hands up their bodies, kissing their lips.

“What? Go where?” He questioned watching you put on your jeans for the second time today.

“Jay’s I was gonna stay at his today, we’re having a film night” You dashed out your bedroom when Ashton's hand wrapped around your wrist.

“Y/N, are you ok? I haven't done something have I?”

“I’m fine, you’re fine, it’s all fine, I’m watching films ok.” You explained, your words coming out a mile a minute. You wiggled out of his grasp running down the stairs to the living room.

“Baby!” Ashton yelled, sighing when you didn’t stop. “Baby!” He huffed, finally catching up to you at the front door while you were trying to your shoes back on. “Look, Y/N if you don’t want to do this anymore I understand, I know-”

“Do you not want to do this anymore Ash? Because it sounds like that's what you want me to say? I know you see other girls-”

“Y/N what are you talking about-”

You huffed, cutting him of not liking the direction of this conversation. You darted out the front door slammed the door, hoping Jay would be cool with your impromptu movie night trying to ignore the uneasiness crawling up your throat.

Your date was going awful.

At first you were quite hopeful, he was the type of guy that used to send to your knees. Broad shoulders, big hands and a nice smile, but your wheelie bin had more personality than he did. You assumed he must have been shy at first, but when he got the waiter's attention by snapping his fingers at them you knew this was going to be a long night.

You leaned back in your chair, picking at the stiff fabric of your dress. Deciding not to wear anything Ashton had bought for you had been a struggle as he had somehow managed to fill up the entire contents of your wardrobe, leaving you with a stiff black dress you had worn once to a job interview.

Just as he began to raise his hand to ask, well click, for the cheque you noticed a waiter close to you and asked for dessert, the only redeeming feature of this restaurant was the chocolate orange brownies and you were determined to enjoy something today. Your date sighed in response, but you were over caring about his feelings when his responses had evolved from yeahs to the occasional hum.

The silence between the two of you was becoming unbearable and you were about to try and start a futile conversation again when a group of four rowdy guys came in, laughing with each other. You felt the atmosphere of the room instantly lifted when you heard a familiar giggle.

Your heart began beating out of your chest when you turned and spotted a familiar head of red hair. You tried to shrink in your chair, pulling up the menu and propping it up on the table trying to cover your face. Suddenly you felt awful, picturing him yesterday when you ran out on him and now you were on a date. You shook it off reminding yourself that you weren't together, he had explained it himself when you first started your relationship. As long as you told him you were seeing someone else he wouldn’t mind...you hadn’t told him.

“One brownie,” The waiter announced, placing the plate down in-between you and your date.

“Thanks,” You smiled tugging the plate towards yourself. You looked over at Ashton, almost hoping he had noticed you, but of course, he hadn’t. You felt your jealousy creep up behind you again, he never said that he had to tell you, what was stopping him from doing this same thing, after all, you were doing it.

You looked from your plate of brownies to your shit date. You remembered when Ashton had brought you some of these because he knew you would like them, you wished you were here with Ashton, you wished you were home with Ashton cuddled up in bed, you wished you had never gone on this stupid date. Never argued with him this morning just because you were jealous. you felt your eyes begin to sting and before you could help it you were crying your tears dripping onto your brownie diluting the thick chocolate sauce.

Your date looked shocked, his mouth opening and closing like a goldfish before he raised his and started clicking. “We’d like the cheque please.” He grumbled. The waiters rushed over, rolling their eyes.

“It’s already been paid, sir,”

“What? By who?” Your date questioned while you continued to sob into your plate.

“That gentleman over there.” The waiter explained, pointing over at your red-haired lover. Making you cry even louder as he asked you if you wanted your brownies to go.

It felt like Deja Vu as you walked through your door two days later, Ashton standing in your living-room countless shopping bags swinging from his arms. “Ash?”

“Doll! You’re home!” Ashton greeted, holding his arms wide, trying to embrace you but being held back by the bags hitting against you. “Oops.” He smiled dropping the bags to the floor and going to embrace you again this time succeeding. You cherished the moment, wrapping your arms around him taking in his scent.

“I missed you,” You mumbled, nuzzling your face into his chest.

“It’s been two days baby, how can you miss me already.” He laughed. You shook your head, pressing a kiss to his chest. “Ok, ok, how about you open your presents.”

You whined, holding onto him tighter, refusing to let go.

“Babbby.” Ashton scolded.

“Daddddyy,” You countered making him shake his head and wrangle himself out of your grip.

“I told you not to call me that,” He said trying not to smile. He sat down on your sofa, pulling you onto his thigh, he wrapped his arms around your waist making you relax against him. “Ok come on baby, how about you open something?”

You sighed, turning to face him. You cupped your hands around his face, your eyes scanning over his every feature, your thumb rubbing against his cheek. You tried to remember everything, the curve of his nose, the curl of his smile, the exact shade of hazel that made you fall in love with his eyes. You brought your lips together, memorising the feeling of his lips against yours, you nipped at his lips, begging for entrance. When the two of you kissed it felt like two waves crashing into each other. You only pulled away when you had to your body desperate for air.

You took a deep breath “Ashton I don’t want to be your sugar baby anymore.”

The smile fell from his lips, his mouth curving into a frown. His hands barely holding onto your waist. “I-you-we-...” He was speechless his eyes growing dull, beginning to sting.

“I don’t want you to buy me anything anymore, I don’t need extravagant gifts, I don’t need any gifts.”

“I-” He interrupted only to be cut off.

“I just need you.”

Tears dripped down Ashton’s cheeks as his mind tried to process what you said, “Just me?” He whispered, his lips ghosting yours. You pressed your lips to his so hard you knew they were going to bruise.

“Just you.” You confirmed. His arms were tight around your waist as he pulled you both off the sofa, swinging you around making you squeal as your legs flailed out. “You don’t mind?”

“MIND? I’ve never wanted anything more.” He sniffed, “Fucking hell baby, I thought I was about to lose you, why would you word it like that?”

“Hey, i thought i was gonna lose you too!” You scowled, pecking him on the lips.

“Baby, I love you more than anything how could you ever think I would let you get away.” He croaked.

“You love me?”

“Was it not obvious? I built your cat a fucking castle,” Ashton giggled.

You pecked his lips again. “I love you too,” and again “so” and again “so” and again “much”

“Be mine? properly this time.” He asked, his eyes staring deep into yours, his breath panting against your lips.

“I’ve always been yours”

#ashton irwin #ash irwin #5sos #5 seconds of summer #fanfic #fanfiction #x reader #blurb #imagine #smut #luke hemmings #michael clifford #calum hood

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lovebunnie · 6 years ago

Note

Do all the asks coward

1. what does your wallet look like?

-i got it as a present from my uncle for christmas and its really expensive but also so ugly im sorry uncle tom. its like that ‘southern fashion’ bullshit that white MAGA moms wear. but it was better than my old wallet, which looks like this and i got when i was 12:

2. favorite color?

- baby pinnk

3. do you own a pride flag, or more than one?

-heres the thing: my parents basically know im not straight but i havent told them. my brother has thought i was a lesbian since freshman year, i have a small pride pin on my backpack, ive never been on a date, its complicated. but no, i dont have one. maybe one day, hopefully.

4. describe your favorite outfit

-black pants, platform doc martens, hoodie under a jean jacket, one clip on earring, and holding my crushes hand :]

5. when was the last time a girl made your heart flutter, and what’d she do?

-okay so theres this girl in my theatre class who is really cute, and she put her head on my shoulder and shes pagan so she drew a little sigil on my arm that means “safe and homely” so like :)))))))))))))

6. do you use nail polish?

-i do, i mostly do black tho

7. do you keep organized?

-absolutely. i have things online filed accordingly, i pick out my outfits the day before, my binders are neat, i learned how to army fold my shirts, i keep my shit CLEAN

8. ever take naps?

-only accidentally. ill be laying in bed watching youtube and next thing you know my autoplay has me watching a markiplier video even tho i dont like him and its 4 hours later

9. who was your first crush?

-idk if this is a real person or not so ill do both. my first fake person crush was either troy from high school musical or frankie stein from monster high. and my first real crush was on a boy named dominic in elementary school. i told him i liked him at the end of 5th grade because i thought i was switching schools but then i didnt and we never spoke again.

10. what are your crush tendencies? fall hard or often?

-both both both. i am the worst with crushes. i have crushes all the time because im romantic and a fucking fool. i have 3 crushes off the top of my head rn and i like them all for different reasons. thats not to say that i want to date them, but its that i like them a lot and i kinda wanna kiss their cheek or hold their hand idk

11. describe your ideal day

-play overwatch with my best friend (u gonble >:) ) then hang out with my cat, go get a smoothie, buy some cool shoes or something, take a shower and be asleep by 9 :,)

12. describe your ideal date

-i have stated that build a bear is an amazing first date and im NOT BACKING DOWN. ITS CUTE AS FUCK AND ILL ACCEPT NOTHING LESS!!

13. whats your favorite food?

-either sushi or strawberries :3c

14. who do you feel most comfortable around?

-my theatre class, people from camp, and gobble <3

15. what is your favorite compliment to receive?

-i dont have a favorite, any and all are going to make my face go red so i have to cover it and maybe make me cry

16. did you/do you like highschool?

-the first 3 years fucking sucked but senior year has been amazing so far. mostly because i just kinda stopped giving a fuck but its amazing

17. favorite animal?

-i think its cats now. i really like cats

18. do you like your name?

-eh, its okay. its pretty but also it seems like there are 60 million fucking people named grace and its so annoying. i wish it was something more unique idk

19. what kind of weather is your favorite?

-a light rain. no swinging trees or thunder, just lots of rain. its nice to stay inside and feel secure

20. do you believe in horoscopes?

-absolutely not. but theyre fun if you like them

21. tell us about your music taste

-its horrific. to sum it up, my two favorite musicians are the gorillaz and frank sinatra. take from that what you will

22. have you had your first kiss? if so, what was it like?

-i havent had my first kiss yet. gonna be honest, i felt like i was going to, a few times at camp and recently when classes ended. but yeah, nothing yet

23. did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a kid?

-i went thro cycles of favorites. but one ive had for years is a plush shadow the hedgehog from universal studios i got when i was 6. i used to carry him around, even to a pool once

24. what time do you usually wake up and go to bed?

-if you know me, you know i go to bed ridiculously early. i usually get tried at around 6pm and fall asleep between 7:45 and 8:30. and i always wake up before 6 am. i havent slept past 6 am continuously since the end of junior year. please help me

25. what dream trip would you take with your wife?

-maybe to go explore new york, just the two of us that sounds like fun :]

26. do you have any pets?

-i have 2 dogs and a cat. the family owns the dogs but that cat is mine

27. what pair of underwear is your favorite?

-uhhhhhhhhhhh i have some with rainbows that are cool? i dont have favorites, none of them are cute anyway

28. what makes you smile?

-funny jokes make me smile real hard, and if you compliment me at the right time, i kind of pull my legs up and hide my face? its cute and charming i promise

29. what makes you feel heavy?

-in both the physical and metaphorical sense, eating bread

30. what makes you feel better?

-watching bo burnham always makes me feel better, hes my go to whenever im really depressed

31. how do you show your love?

-i show my love in everything i do. everything i do is for love, i love love so much its sickening

32. when is it time to get a haircut?

-whenever u want to lol?

33. where would you live if you could live anywhere?

-maybe san francisco, its beautiful and i love the city

34. do your friends and family take good care of you?

-as much as i allow them to. sometimes i go days without communicating and i know thats annoying but my friends put up with it (they shouldnt have to, i know) and my family is okay. its cliche to say, but they honestly dont understand what im going thro alot of the times, esp with my anxiety and shit

35. have you always used the labels you use now?

-back in the beginning of highschool, i used they/them pronouns and identified as asexual/aromantic. eventually, it didnt feel right, so i know identify as cis and bisexual and that feels right to me

36. what makes you laugh?

-my friends, when people shit talk gobble and i in overwatch even tho???? we didnt know him?????? and the mcelroys always get me

37. who is your favorite fictional character?

-too many options, see list here

38. who do yo admire?

-my father when hes not threatening to throw my phone into a fucking lake and my friends for putting up with me

39. describe yourself in three words

-i am baby

40. how long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

-usually about 45 min, more or less as each day goes

41. what do you wish you could tell your younger self?

-listen: STOP GIVING A FUCK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE. YOU WILL NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN, BE YOURSELF. STOP HIDING AND BEING SCARED OF YOURSELF, BE GENUINE!!!!

42. what would you do if you win the lottery?

-get my parents settled, see about other family members, and then distribute the money to charities accordingly, starting with flint and getting them water

43. would you call yourself a romantic?

-yes

44. what is your gayest childhood memory?

-my mom had cosmos magazines

45. do you have tattoos or want any?

-i dont have any tattoos but ive been obsessed with them since the 6th grade. id love to get tattoos, i just dont know what or where and also im afraid of pain

46. whats your worst habit?

-either biting my thumbs, starving myself, or ghosting my friends. prob ghosting my friends

47. what are you proud of?

-i guess coming out of my shell finally? idk, i actually have friends now and it feels amazing tbh. im in 5 group chats now. i havent been in a group chat since 6th grade. :))))))

48. did you know that youre actually a gift to the world, for real?

-hi i love you?

49. whats your favorite memory?

-there are so so many. but what comes to mind first is our dance night at camp where we all stood outside and i finally gave ian my tumblr and we all ran inside to dance to mr. brightside then ran outside again and we requested nightcore and rivers was fucking dancing their hearts out and we all sang along and im going to crying just typing this out

50. do you have a sweet tooth?

-i guess so. too much makes me feel like shit but i do really enjoy smarties

51. what do you like most about yourself?

-this is dumb, but my sense of style. since i got a job ive been wearing shit i actually like and its amazing. ill admit i have cool clothes

52. what makes you fall for a girl?

-besides acknowledging me, probably getting to know me and not like, putting me on a pedestal. idk its weird, ive met a lot of people this year who like to place me so high it feels like i cant make a mistake around them without disappointing them. idk, i want someone to call me out on my bullshit instead of assuring me im okay. i want to know what i do wrong so i can fix it

53. make a recommendation

-for what? uhh okay for music, listen to ‘clay pigeons’ by michael cera (yes i know michael cera) and for television, watch bojack horseman and for movies, watch the docuseries called ‘7 days out’ on netflix

54. have you ever had your heart broken?

-yeah, when i broke up with maddy because we werent ready to date. i cared and continue to care about her and i didnt want to hurt her but i knew its what we both needed. its what i needed, atleast. and i cant be a good girlfriend if i feel like im doing badly. but also ive had friends break my heart and family break my heart. but im okay now, this heart is ready to be broken again

55. when do you feel most yourself?

-def when i was at camp, that place is magical in the way it allows you to be yourself. but also when i talk to gobble because hes my best friend and when im at college, we can talk more and its gonna be dope as shit

56. name a gorgeous celeb

-jake gyllenhaal jake gyllenhaal jake gyllenhaal

57. what are some of your favorite songs this week?

-fake happy by paramore, im not okay (i promise) by my chemical romance, tomorrow comes today by gorillaz

58. tell us 2 or your biggest hopes and fears

-biggest hopes: i publish a book someday & i get a job doing something i love

-biggest fears: i end up homeless and broke & something horrific happens in college

59. what flavor chapstick/lipbalm is the best?

-raspberry i guess

60. are you okay?

-i answered a lot more honestly then i shouldve for some of these and i start new classes tomorrow so im feeling really anxious so im doing alright i guess.

gobble you test me but i do love you

#g0bbleb0ners #that took 90 minutes #also i got kinda real here.... :////////#whatever no one reads these things anyway

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starry-kfics · 7 years ago

Text

ink poisoning [changbin]

mel here for day 4 of appreciating stray kids, with our soft little shadow boy binnie binnie changbinnie!! if you like soulmate aus, i’ve been writing one for every boy’s appreciation day (can be found on my masterlist)

word count: 1951

warnings: mild cursing (hell, etc.)

author: mel

extra info: soulmate au where whatever you write on your skin shows up on theirs, and vice versa

♡

You woke with a start one day, after a particularly bad dream. You couldn’t quite remember what it was about, but it left you with tears staining your cheeks. Grabbing your pen, you hoped that he was awake.

‘Changbin?’ You scribbled onto your hand, knowing that if he was awake, he tended to like to wear sweaters, covering up any writing you might put on your forearm.

'Yes, Y/N?’ Came the reply, in his familiar and somewhat messy handwriting along your forearm, signalling that he had pulled up his sleeve for a full conversation.

'Why are you awake?’

'I could ask you the same’

'I had a bad dream’

'What happened in it?’

'I don’t remember’

'You should try to go back to sleep’

'Why are you awake?’

'Working’

'Don’t stay up too late, Binnie’

'I won’t, jagi, now go to sleep’

'Fine’

'I’ll talk to you later’

'You better’

'Y/N, sleep’

Even though you’d never heard Changbin’s voice, you could almost feel the stern tone he had through his note.

It had been nearly a year since your soulmate indicator was activated. You and Changbin had never tried to met up, exchange numbers, call each other, or even email each other. Why? You didn’t quite know, there was something comforting about just being able to write to him, as if he was your own personal pen pal. Something secure about it, as if you were safe from any sort of rejection. That idea in itself was ridiculous, you two were soulmates. But that lingering fear was still in you, keeping you from ever trying to take it further with Changbin.

And he didn’t try either, so you imagined that he had the same thoughts as you. Which you were perfectly content with.

Your friends and family always nagged at you to meet this boy that you couldn’t shut up about and were definitely head over heels for, but you couldn’t bring yourself to.

“Y/N, turn that light off.” Your friend Jiwoo grumbled from the air mattress on the floor.

“Sorry,” You mumbled, forgetting that you were having a sleepover together while you both were back in town for winter break.

Not wanting to upset her any more, you quickly leaned over to click your lamp off. Rolling over in your bed and pulling your blanket tighter around you, you slowly drifted off back to sleep.

When you woke up again, you saw that Jiwoo wasn’t in her bed, and heard the shower running. You chuckled to yourself at how at home she made herself in your home, and grabbed your pen before heading towards the kitchen.

“Morning, Mom.” You greeted the woman in the kitchen with a yawn and a smile.

“Morning, Y/N.” She looked up from her book for a moment. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready?”

“For what?”

“Jiwoo told me you all are going to brunch.”

“First I’ve heard.”

“Well you should go get ready. It sounds like she just got out of the shower, and if I remember she’s not very patient.”

“She’s not.” You agreed, traipsing back to your room to choose what to wear.

As Jiwoo did her makeup in the bathroom, and you got changed in your room, a small doodle on your wrist caught your attention. You chuckled when you saw that it was meant to be Gyu, the Pokemon plush Changbin has. Drawing next to it, you added a couple little hearts before returning to your outfit. You knew that Changbin must be bored, he only doodled if he had nothing better to do.

'Y/N~~~~~~’

'Binnie~~~~’

'I’m bored’

'I can tell’

'We should play a game’

'I wish I could, but I’m going out with my friend’

'Fine, have fun!’

'Thanks, jagi, I’ll write to you later’

“Y/N! What’s taking so long?” Jiwoo’s voice suddenly penetrated through your door, accompanied by loud knocks as her fist slammed against the wood.

“You’re so impatient, Chuu!” You retorted, calling her by the cutesy nickname you knew would usually calm her down.

“Sorry,” She uttered in a much softer tone. “I’m just really excited.”

“It’s just brunch.” Shaking your head, you straightened out your shirt and took one more look in the mirror.

“I just have a really good feeling about this brunch.”

“Well now I’m suspicious.”

Swinging the door open, you were met with a smiling Jiwoo, who immediately grabbed your arm to pull you towards the front door. You managed to grab your purse and yell out a goodbye to your mom before being yanked onto the streets. Jiwoo and you kept up an amicable conversation as you walked, and when you brought your hand up to brush a piece of hair out of your face, you saw it. A giant scribbled mess along your arm and hand.

“What’s wrong with him?” Jiwoo snorted, to which you frowned.

“He must be trying to get my attention.” You desperately tried to find a blank space to write back to him.

'Binnie, what’s wrong?’

'Nothing’

'Then what’s with the mess?’

'My friends were writing inappropriate things so I had to scribble them out. For your sake’

'What kind of things?’

'You really don’t want to know’

'Did they draw penises?’

'How did you know?’

'All of your friends are immature 12 years olds’

'Jeongin wants you to know that he’s actually 18’

'Jeongin can go choke’

'Y/N’

'Changbin’

'You made him cry’

'Whoops?’

'They’re fake tears, because he’s a little bitch’

'Oh my god’

'I’ve got to go, Chan is assaulting me now for calling him that’

'Don’t get killed, bye jagi’

'I’ll try’

Capping your pen, you saw that Jiwoo had stopped you two, but not in front of the brunch place. “Why are we at the mall?”

“You need new clothes.” She declared, leading the way to one store. “A brunch outfit!”

“What’s wrong with my current one?”

“Nothing, it’s cute. But you should be looking hot.”

“What are you on today, Chuu?” You raised an eyebrow as your friend started rifling through racks of clothes.

“Nothing new!”

“But seriously, I’m not buying a new outfit just for brunch, I barely have enough cash to pay for said brunch.”

“I’ll pay for it!” Chuu chirped, grabbing a shirt to go with the bottoms she chose, then a jacket before speeding over towards the shoes.

“You’re crazy, I’m not letting you buy me an outfit just to go to brunch.”

“Yes you are.”

“No, I’m not.” You grabbed her arm to stop her from calling for an assistant to open a dressing room for you. “ChuuChuu, please just stop whatever this is you’re doing.”

As soon as she widened her eyes and stuck out her bottom lip ever so slightly, you were done for. She unfortunately knew just how to get her way. “Fine, I’ll try them on, but no way in hell are you buying these for me.”

“Yay!” Jiwoo squealed, waving over a worker who promptly unlocked the dressing room for you.

So Jiwoo might be acting crazier than usual, but at least she had actually chosen a very cute outfit for you. It was kind of scary how she knew all your sizes and your style perfectly, but that probably came from your nineteen years of friendship.

“Okay, you win. It’s a cute outfit.” You called out to where she waiting outside your door.

“Let me see it!”

Opening to door, you showed to her, doing a small spin at her request. “It’s perfect, Y/N! Give me the tags so I can go buy them, you stay in the clothes, okay?”

Before you could argue, she was already snapping tags off of all the individual items, from the necklace down to the shoes. Gleefully, she ran over to the cash register, and the cashier gave the both of you a strange look before shrugging, going along with your friend’s weird tendencies. Sighing, you gathered up your old clothes, waiting for Jiwoo to return so you could put them in her backpack she always insisted on carrying around.

As the two of you left the store, she had a renewed skip in her step, one that was contagious. You found yourself walking with some confidence too, loving how you felt in this outfit.

Finally, you two were at the brunch place, and just as you were about to grab the door handle, Chuu stopped you. “Hold on.”

“What are you doing, Jiwoo?” You raised an eyebrow, complying as she took out her phone to fervently type something in.

“Give… me… one minute…” She muttered, intently reading whatever the person she was texting had replied with.

Curious, you read her conversation with 'Felix’ over her shoulder, throat closing on itself as you realized what was happening, “Kim Jiwoo, what the hell do you think you’re doing?”

She whipped around, looking at you fearfully as you were sure you had a murderous look on your own face. “I’m helping you, Y/N.”

“No, I don’t want this!”

“Y/N, come on, they’re right inside.” Jiwoo gestured, and your eyes followed her hand, landing on two guys sitting in the corner booth beside the window.

One of them was Changbin, and you felt like you were going to puke. “No!” You just about yelled, taking off blindly down the street.

“Y/N!” She called after you, but you didn’t reply.

You couldn’t believe that Jiwoo had done this. Organized for you to meet Changbin in person, without your knowledge, and maybe not even with his either, since she was texting 'Felix’. You were comfortable with your current relationship with Changbin, how dare she take it upon herself to upset that?

You didn’t get very far before another voice yelled your name out, much deeper than Jiwoo’s. Skidding to a stop, your heart thundered in your ears and you couldn’t even bring yourself to turn to look at them. At him. Changbin.

“Y/N,” he repeated, breath heavy from the small chase he gave you.

“Changbin?” You questioned, even thought you were sure it was him.

“Can you please look at me?”

Slowly, you turned around to look at him. He didn’t stand very tall, wore a flannel and black baseball cap, but his eyes were what caught you. They were striking, as if he could know everything about with one look. Of course he already did, you’d poured out most of your soul through your ink and skin conversations.

“Hi.”

“Hi.” He said, his mouth quirking up in amusement.

“I’m sorry.”

“For running?”

“Yeah, and for this whole thing happening. I don’t even know how Jiwoo did this.”

“Turns out her and Felix wrote to each other, on our arms, while we were asleep this morning.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” Changbin confirmed, and there was still an air of awkwardness between you two. “If it means anything, I didn’t even know about this until we were in the booth and Felix told me that my soulmate was coming, how he knew, and then that my soulmate was the person running away.”

“I’m sure that was a great first impression.” You muttered, and Changbin tilted his head to the side.

“That wasn’t a first impression, I already knew you were amazing.”

“Oh.”

“So, can we go get brunch now? If you’re ready, I mean, I can leave and we can keep giving ourselves ink poisoning if you’d like.”

“You can’t actually get ink poisoning like that.” You immediately retorted, which brought a smile to Changbin’s face. “And I think brunch still sounds good.”

“I know a great place a few streets over,” He suggested, and you raised an eyebrow.

“And leave our friends?”

“I personally don’t want them obsessively watching every interaction between us.”

You let out a light laugh, knowing that Jiwoo would definitely do that. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Let’s go.” Changbin offered his hand out to you, and you shyly took it in yours before starting down the street.

#imagines: changbin #skdays #forchangbin #seo changbin #stray kids #stray kids iamgines #stray kids imagine #stray kids scenarios #stray kids scenario #changbin #changbin imagines #changbin imagine #seo changbin imagine #seo changbin imagines #e: skdays #au: ink poisoning #author: mel #*100 #*200

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platinumjeon · 7 years ago

Text

kicking daisies | (m)

► words; 10k

► warnings; mention/implied usage of drugs and alcohol, smut

► genre; jeongguk x reader, fuckboy!jeongguk, soft!jeongguk, slow burn to actual smut, sickening fluff

► summary; To everyone on campus, Jeon Jeongguk is the star of the show, a trust fund baby, private college student fuckboy who gets every girl with the curl of his beckoning finger. To you, though, his pretty words and bunny smile hold more than what he’s giving away.

Welcome to what could possibly be a new series! I’m not sure if I want this to be a new series or not, since it’s already 10k words, but I’d LOVE to get some feedback on it. New series or keep it as a big one shot? Enjoy!!

He was a young God at Bainbridge University, really, for everyone he crossed paths with melted at the sound of his voice and the lilted twist of pretty words from his red lips. Bainbridge (“for the wealthy” affectionately tagged onto the end of the school’s title by its students) was a puppy mill for future scholars of rocket science and civil engineering, but it also bred and hid away drug lords and up-and-coming alcoholics in the catacombs of its classrooms. You were sure there wasn’t one closet left un-christened by dried come and used Magnums.

Jeongguk was a mystery, and he knew you knew that. If he had gotten in trouble, there was no proof. There was never an incident where Jeongguk was called to the chancellor’s office, or where security would come and get him. You think the same thing as every other student; his dad pays off the school if there’s any trouble because wealthy lawyers can do that for their future wealthy lawyer sons.

At this particular party though, things were different in a way you couldn’t describe. Ji Su had run off with her latest boy toy and had left you to fend for yourself in a semi-tight black dress she had suckered you into and a red solo cup in your hand filled with a mystery liquid that tasted slightly sour. The entire house was full of boys who looked nothing like they would in the classroom on Monday, but since there were no dress codes outside of campus, the boys dressed in loose shorts and backwards hats, a joint in one hand and shots of vodka in the other.

“Fake friend,” you muttered, bringing the cup to your lips and sipping so it looked like you were down to have a good time, but not too good of a time, because you had a huge test on Monday and you could just see the huge F imprinted on the paper and-

“Having fun?” said Jeongguk. He had come up to you and had an arm leaning on the side of the wall before the spiral glass stairs, dressed in something every other boy here was dressed in. Grey sweater and black jeans, hair pushed back instead of gelled backwards for class. His tongue poked the side of his cheek as he spoke, eyes on fire as they looked you up and down, and you almost choked on your drink as he appeared in your line of vision.

“Oh-” you said, coughing awkwardly, “Me? Yeah. Oh, yeah, totally. Best party.”

He was so obvious, you thought, as he looked you up and down again before moving closer to you and licking his lips. “What’re you drinking?”

Coughing again, you take a step backwards. “I don’t know, some shit Ji Su gave me,” glancing down at the brown liquid in your drink.

Jeongguk half-smiles, an albeit fake laugh escaping his mouth, and you find it intoxicating. But not as intoxicating as the image of your closed textbooks on your otherwise empty desk in your empty room, calling for you to get your ass home and study until 4 AM.

“How about we forget this mystery drink and ah...” Jeongguk said quietly, moving towards you then backwards to lightly drag his finger under your chin ever so slightly so you were looking up at him. He moved closer to you, his mouth so close to your ear that you could feel small puffs of breath hitting your skin when he whispered, “take this upstairs, hmm?”

You pause, mentally weighing your options: A, throw the drink down and attack his lips and let him take you upstairs. Or, B, set the drink down, move away from him and catch a cab to your nice, warm dorm room back on campus. Honestly, the thought of cracking open a book at this hour kind of sucked, but you knew letting Jeongguk plant his lips on yours was a one time, one night, never-to-happen-again sort of thing.

You didn’t mind as much now that the opportunity had presented itself.

Setting the drink down and pointedly looking back up at Jeongguk, his signature smirk was ironed on his face as if he had just won a plush toy at a claw machine.

Just another one in his crop of used girls, remember that.

His hand reached out to grasp yours and you almost pulled away at the unfamiliarity, but the warmth his palm transferred to yours was almost soothing. Following him up the glass stairs, you could only slightly hear the pumping of trap hits booming from the surround sound speakers in the living room now.

If this is going to happen, might as well make it good.

Jeongguk pulls you into a room -- his room, by the looks of it. Your hands find purchase on his sweater and immediately your lips are on his even as the lights go out. They’re soft, plush, and warm, and you find yourself melting into him like everyone else does. A soft sigh escapes your lips as his hands edge towards the back of your thighs to grope your ass, hands squeezing as his tongue parts your lips and its then that you’re unsure if its the alcohol or Jeongguk, because you’re on the bed, bare and showing yourself to him as your hands pull his sweater over his head. Liquid courage coursed through your veins like a river and as soon as you could make out his pretty face in the darkness, your arms were thrown around his neck to lure his lips to yours-

“Yo, Jeongguk! Oh - shit, sorry, but dude, you’re out of vodka.”

Growling, Jeongguk’s head whips towards the door just as his lips were about to connect to yours, and crawls off of you as his friend just watches from the door.

“Damn, dude, finally smashing Y/N! Nice-”

Jeongguk, shirtless and hair a tousled mess, stalks over to the door and shoves Taehyung out with one push of his hand to the other boy’s chest, and slams the door in his face before walking over to retrieve his sweater from the floor and throw it in the hamper.

“W-where are you going?” You ask, propping yourself up on your elbows as you watch him slip a new navy blue shirt over his toned body, and he barely looks at you before walking towards the door. “Get dressed. We’ll do this some other time.”

Class wasn’t even awkward that Monday, or maybe you were just tired from studying all night, but what you were sure about was that Jeon Jeongguk didn’t look at you once. He stayed perfectly still, stock straight in his front row seat, eyes trained on the teacher and board the entire 90 minute lesson. As the bell rang, you took your time packing up your books when a minatory shadow cast over you.

“Y/N. I’m sorry for last night, when we run out of vodka things get a little crazy, you know?” Jeongguk said, that signature smirk reappearing in the same way it did the night he asked to take you upstairs - mischievous, mysterious, playful.

You snorted. “Totally.” Holding your books to your chest, you began to weave around desks and towards the door, but Jeongguk was behind you without missing a step.

“I really,” he said quietly, standing at the door you had stopped at to face him, “wish we could have continued last night.”

Shaking your head, you jostled the notebooks into your bag. “I don’t,” you said, shrugging and throwing your backpack over your shoulders before walking out of the science wing. You were half expecting him to follow you, but Jeon Jeongguk would never out himself like that. The fact that you were so close to hopping on him the night before and riding him until you couldn’t think coherent thoughts any longer kind of hindered your thoughts right now - it was no secret Jeongguk may be attracted to you, or he’s just knockin’ ‘em down a girl at a time until he’s ready to move onto a new hobby. Either way, you didn’t really care, but the lingering texture of his fingertips and feel of his lips on yours was making you want to run back in there and yell, “Just kidding! I’d love to continue last night!” That’s probably what he wanted anyway, and what Jeongguk wanted was you, and for once in his life, it was something he wouldn’t get.

You stood outside your dorm room, desperately slamming your fist against the oak door in an attempt to summon your roommate from her impenetrable slumber. By the 10th time yelling her name, you give up and drop your backpack to the floor along with your tired body, resting your back against the grainy white wall.

It was midnight. The library had closed on you and having locked yourself out for the hundredth time this month, sleeping in the hallway seemed like a plausible situation at the moment. Shrugging to yourself, you move your backpack around until it was less rock hard and chock full of text books and mechanical pencils.

You sighed. This sucks, you thought as your head hit the book bag with an audible thump. Had you just remembered to grab the key on your desk, and had remembered that your roommate had the terrible habit of falling asleep knowing you were out and still locking the door. Bitch.

Closing your eyes, you tried to settle in towards the wall and curl up into a ball to conserve warmth, but footsteps and a scratchy voice made your eyes pry open to see your newfound companion.

“Y/N? What are you doing out here?” Jeongguk said loudly, and before you knew it he was crouching in front of you, his hands clasped together and - oh, god. His crotch was right in front of your face. You swallowed and refused to meet his eyes, your cheek on your clasped palms as you stare at the space on the other side of the hallway, right through Jeongguk’s parted legs.

“What’s it to you?” You asked, shifting slightly and squeezing your eyes shut before opening them again. This is uncomfortable as fuck, and Jeongguk noticed as you continued to shift your feet so your hip bone wasn’t glued to the floor and shooting a dull ache through your spine.

Jeongguk’s eyebrows move up, just like they had at the party and he cocks his head. “Well, you look pretty uncomfortable. Roommate fucking in your room?” He asks with a tongue pressed against his cheek, making this boy look like the cockiest brat you’d ever seen, and the anger continued to burn inside you. You couldn’t decide if you were salty over the fact that his fuckboy ass left you naked and afraid in the bedroom he had previously been ready to ravage you in (you’d been pretty damn ready yourself), or if his cockiness just bothered you until the anger flared in your chest and you wanted nothing to do with him. And his red lips and pretty words. And his see-through t-shirt and his swoopy hair.

What was his motive? You’d never spoken to him in your life, never exchanged any kind of eye contact or even been in the same classes. What was his major, anyway?

You rolled your eyes. “I’m perfectly comfortable. And no. She’s just a heavy sleeper,” You said with an annoyed, lilted twinge to your voice. Jeongguk didn’t even as much flinch, but you sure did when he sat criss-cross in front of you in his white t-shirt and red checkered pajama pants.

Jeongguk hummed, “Sure thing, but ah, Taehyung won’t be back tonight. There’s an open bed if you want it.” He says, and his eyes sweep the empty hallway and the white tile you’re currently laying on.

Snorting, you shift so you’re propped up on one elbow. “Yeah, right. Just so you can try some shit and leave me laying there again when you “run out of vodka.” You quote, but you don’t lay back down. A bed. It sounds so appealing, but then you remember Jeongguk’ll be in there with you and immediately you want to plop back down and ignore him until he leaves.

It was Jeongguk’s turn to protest. “Hey, that was true! I didn’t mean to leave you laying there, I just..” He trails off and averts his gaze from your eyes for a moment but immediately flashes a dazing, confident yet sheepish smile. “We really did run out of vodka. You’re hot as fuck, why would I leave you there without-”

Your hands flew up to stop him from finishing his sentence as you sit up to face him. “Okay, okay, sure, fine. I don’t want to sleep on jizz-stained sheets, especially Taehyung’s. Who knows who’s been in his bed,” You mutter, and reach up to scratch your head absentmindedly. Jeongguk looks on with amusement, as if he has something on his mind but he keeps whatever it may be to himself, much to your gratitude.

Jeongguk cracks a sly smile. “So you’re saying you’d rather sleep in my bed?”

“What the fuck, no! Ugh, Jeongguk, just leave me al-”

His hand shoots out to grasp your wrist just as you’re about to lay back down on your makeshift pillow for the night, and it’s like the whole world shifts and the air becomes different somehow. You almost catch your breath hitching at the curl of his fingers on your skin, his heated palm making your entire body sizzle with the same feeling as when he first brought his fingers to your skin - or was that embarrassment?

It was the latter, because you’re pulling away from him and grasping at your bag. “No, I’m-I’ll go elsewhere.” You choke out.

Jeongguk stands as well, but he stands in your way of escape, the hallway is so close yet so far..just down the stairs and you’ll be away from the kid who is constricting your breath with the touch of his fingers on your flaming skin.

“No, don’t. Please just sleep in my room, you can sleep in my bed and I’ll sleep in Taehyung’s, I just changed my sheets,” He pleads. Jeongguk seems to catch himself at that moment, his figure slightly slouched and his shoulders hunched -- it made him look almost...caring. He straightened, then added, “Where the fuck else are you going to go anyway, obviously your roommate is a little busy without you fucking some guy-”

“Fine. Fine! I’ll stay in your room. But don’t expect anything out of me. I have pepper spray (no, you didn’t), and the money for a lawyer (nope).” You spit, standing directly in front of him with your bag clasped to your chest, and Jeongguk’s confident, cocky smile returns to his face within seconds.

“Well, then, please be my guest,” Jeongguk says with his dazzling smile, and his arms sweep towards his side of the hallway, ushering you to head straight somewhere you had promised yourself you’d never step foot into.

That’s where you found yourself, though, because within minutes you’re curled up with your face towards the wall, body covered by Jeongguk’s duvet and resting on Jeongguk’s sheets and Jeongguk’s pillow. What made you decide to accept his begging and pleading, no one knows, but in a way you weren’t entirely unsatisfied with your decision.

You shook your head. No, now he’s going to think that you’re his friend, and then he’s going to pull you in with his niceness and fake-gentlemanly-ness when in reality all he wants is to fuck -- which at first would have been your ideal situation but now, as you lay here in his bed in a white t-shirt -- his white t-shirt, you were rethinking that ideal.

“You’re comfortable?” Jeongguk asks after a few moments of silence, only the box fan on the black office chair in the corner making white background noise (which you’re sure you’d be grateful for in the long run to block out the sound of him jacking away at 3am, you’re sure it’s a possibility).

You shift to only turn your head to him, positive the double chin was making an appearance, and nodded. A soft yes left your lips and then you were settling back into your spot facing the wall. Jeongguk sighed, but as expected, he didn’t shut up.

“Where were you that you got locked out?” He asked suddenly, but you stayed still. “C’mon, Y/N, I know you’re not asleep that fast.”

Huffing, you tantalize, “What, are you my dad now?”

Immediately, you regret those exact words because you can almost feel the growing, sly grin on the kid’s face, “No, but I could be your sugar dadd-”

“You know, you have a problem with sexual comments. They’re so out of context!” You exclaim. “Besides, you’re a college kid. Sugar daddy my ass. Otherwise-” You stop short, almost finishing with “-I’d have already hooked up with you,” in which the thought of finishing that sentence you brought your hand up to your face to cover your mouth, eyes shut and hoping somehow you would just knock out at this very moment.

Jeongguk was quiet, but you could hear the steadiness of his puffs of breath but then he turned to you, quickly. “What were you going to say, Y/N, hm?” The amusement in his voice that you realized you really fucking hated by now was back, and you could hear the rustle of his sheets as he shifted around once again.

“Nothing. Go to sleep. I’m tired.” You bark, and finally, he’s quiet.

You awoke to loud snoring on Jeongguk’s part, and momentarily forget where you are. The room is dark, the sun having not yet made an appearance in the ash grey sky thanks to the ceasing season of autumn. You could hear the birds beginning their morning songs, but all else was peaceful and quiet.

Adjusting to the darkness surrounding you, you turned and your eyes caught sight of Jeon Jeongguk, the sheet pulled halfway up to one thigh and the other leg hanging off the bed. One hand rested on his chest and the other was above his head, and he snored quietly in time with the birdsong out the window. You noticed that sometime during the night he had shed his white t-shirt, and you looked down at the one you were wearing with a grimace.

It was obvious why girls went for Jeongguk. He was so sweet at first, whispering kind and heart-heavy words into the pierced ears of unsuspecting girls but he was also so broad and gruff, down for anything, and the appeal of adventure radiated off of him like sunshine on water. That’s what Jeon Jeongguk was -- an adventure that not a lot of people have traipsed upon yet and he was an opportunity. You were sure he thought of you as the same. A mere opportunity.

It made you want to throw his hand off his chest and wake him up with your lips against his because truthfully, you hadn’t stopped thinking about when that did happen, but the soft way he looked at this moment also made you want to run your hands through his hair and curl up at his side with your head on his chest.

You turned on your back, sighing and closing your eyes then turning to face your upcoming problem once again. This is what he wanted, you were falling for him all because he let you sleep in his room for a night. He was just a fuckboy. A trust fund baby, spoiled rotten by a rich lawyer father who donates thousands to the school every year. You thought for a moment, what would happen to this school after their prized possession graduated this year and the money no longer flowed? Back to textbook classes, you supposed.

Jeongguk shifted so he was on his side, facing you. His eyes flickered underneath his lids, and you thought about what he could be dreaming about. Instead, you found yourself staring straight into his open eyes after they slowly cracked to take in the now lightening room.

“Y/N?” He croaked, raspy voice shaking you out of your thoughts and your eyes widened, shifting from his gaze to stare at the wall behind him.

“Yeah.” You said, coughing to clear your throat.

Jeongguk yawns, his arms coming above his head to stretch then coming down to pull the covers over his body. Your eyes teetered on the image of his bare chest and sculpted abs adoring his Greek-God like body that you didn’t notice that Jeongguk had been staring at you.

“What time is it?” Jeongguk said huskily, a large yawn following after his words and his hand reaching up to scratch his head.

You gulp. “Time for you to go back to sleep goodnight Jeongguk,” your words came out fast and desperate, unsure if he had noticed you blatantly staring at his pretty face and pretty body and everything in betw-

“Oh. Well, um, goodnight.” Jeongguk said, turned over, and his breathing steadied enough for you to finally let out that cautionary breath you’d been holding the entire time.

An hour later, you had finally resorted to the fact that there was no way you’d be able to get back to sleep. It was freezing in here, fact of the fan and the autumn breeze coming from the window you had opened a while after Jeongguk fell fast asleep again. Dropping your phone on the bedside table and wincing at the thump it made, you moved the covers off your body and the goosebumps took the sheet’s warmth from your skin.

Grumbling, you stand and wobble slightly before walking to the bathroom on Jeongguk’s side of the room. His dad must’ve paid for this room, something that would have cost you a kidney and probably your liver too, because everyone else had to use the co-ed dormitory bathrooms down the hall. You could get used to this, really -- what, no, you thought, shaking the thought from your head before you elaborate on it, turning ifs into when’s wasn’t on your to-do list at the moment, and hopefully would never be when it came to Jeongguk. There was no denying how attracted you were to him, you just hoped it wasn’t obvious.

You didn’t even bother turning on the light when you entered the bathroom, did your business and then unlocked the door to walk out, but what did happen was the shriek that fell from your mouth when you slammed into a hard body and fell flat on your floor probably woke the whole floor up.

What else happened, though, is instead of Jeongguk falling backwards onto his own square of the floor, he fell on top of you, tipping forward and taking you down with him so your head was on the tile floor and the rest of your body on the carpet of the dorm room.

He had you pinned there, his heavy muscle holding you hostage but through the rising sunlight you could see Jeongguk’s eyes staring at your face, concern filling the space you had seen lust occupy every time there was a run-in between the two of you.

“Y/N, I’m sorry, I-”

“No, it’s fine-”

Silence after that as the two of you stared at each other for what seemed like minutes before Jeongguk leans down and hastily presses his lips to yours in a hurried attempt to quiet your protests before he could memorize this moment. His lips were soft and plush and gentler than they were that night you had first tasted him, the languid movements of his tongue prying at your lips making you melt under his affections but question his motive once again.

You didn’t pull away - oh, no - but your hands tangled themselves in his hair and your painted fingernails twisted silk strands in twirls as Jeongguk laid on top of you, his body suspended by his arms just inches from the skin of your shoulders. The electricity crackled and popped between his hot skin and yours, making you want to get closer quicker, and longer.

By the time the two of you broke apart for real the sun had taken it’s place rising steadily through the darkness and cutting away the night for the chirping of birds and lawnmowers in the early morning.

It was silent for a long time. Breathing heavy, your hands stayed twisted in his hair but then the thoughts came, what were you doing? This wasn’t something you planned, not something on your agenda, it had to be a figment of your vivid imagination but then Jeongguk leaned down to press another kiss to your lips and it magnified the protests in your head.

“Jeongguk, get off-” You said, wriggling between his cage surrounding you and finally slipping away. The heavy breathing wasn’t from the kissing anymore, it was from the nervousness and anxiety that seeped into your veins like an Arcadian, caustic substance that wasn’t something easily expelled.

“Y/N-”

Jeongguk laid there, now on his back, his head where yours was with a hand on his stomach, just like he was hours earlier as his snoring self slept. His eyes were open though - they stared at the white, popcorn-painted ceiling. Jeongguk’s image was a juxtaposition almost - the sleeping, quiet figure mere minutes before to now - hair a mess thanks to your fingers, clothing rumpled and eyes tired but full of starlight.

“I need to go,” you grumbled, gathering your book bag and stealing one last glance at your pendulous one-night roommate gathered on the floor who had just kissed you like there was no tomorrow at 7am, and walked out of the door before he could fit in another word.

An entire week dragged by without as much as a word exchanged between you and Jeongguk, a seemingly wretched way of dealing with your ever-so-developing feelings but what other way was there to extinguish them into tiny embers? No other way, that’s what.

You walked alone as usual, backpack on your shoulders and face downcast to your feet as they walked along the pavement to your dorm, hoping your roommate would have the decency after you chewed her out the other night to unlock the goddamn door so you wouldn’t find yourself on the floor again - or face to face with Jeongguk.

Thoughts about him wandered your mind aimlessly, often his image coming up after the professor says a word remotely similar to the sound of his name. The worst part was, was that this is exactly what fuck boys of Jeongguk’s sort did - they kiss you and leave you to simmer in your own sclerotic thoughts until whoever it was came running back for more. It’s almost like he planned the entire thing out, and at this point, you wouldn’t put that accusation behind you.

Watching your feet shuffle towards your dorm room, you shook your head to erase the thoughts of Jeongguk from your brain like an etch-a-sketch. Shake to erase.

Turning the corner to the entrance to your housing, books clutched to your chest and all, you found yourself nose to nose with no one other than Jeongguk. He was being followed by Taehyung and Jimin, two of his other fuckboy friends. He quirked an eyebrow in your direction as you backed away with a small sorry and continued on without a second thought, or so Jeongguk thought, because at that point in time your mind was racing.

What would Taehyung think when he found out you had slept in Jeongguk’s bed without having sex with him? Well -- he would probably high-five him and fist lock like the bro dude he so is, because judging what he had yelled when he walked in on you and Jeongguk the first time about “finally smashing Y/N,” it was probable Taehyung would congratulate him for the step closer.

It was odd, what Taehyung said the other day when he walked in on you and Jeongguk. “Finally smashing Y/N, nice!” He had yelled, looking ready to fist bump Jeongguk when ultimately his best friend slammed the door in his face. “Finally.” You had heard about the bets boys would make over who could get a particular girl in bed first, were you a victim of that? No way, you were nobody on this campus, just another med student out of hundreds - there was no finally about you.

Rushing upstairs and slamming the door behind you, you rushed to your window and peered through the curtains. There was Jeongguk, standing with Taehyung and Jimin with his hands pushed deep into his pockets, looking solemn and contumacious. His foot scrapes the ground as Taehyung talks animatedly with his hands, while Jimin discretely turns towards the building to light a cigarette.

You wonder what they’re on about, when Jeongguk looks towards the sky with pursed lips and then at the building, locking eyes with you before you’re able to push yourself away from the window and start freaking out over the fact that he saw you spying on him. Instead, you stand there like an idiot for a mere 5 seconds, deep brown eyes locked on yours before your mind is shifting your body to move away before your heart can.

The third time (or the second, technically, but you’re counting the eye contact out your window the day before) you run into Jeongguk is in the lecture hall for your organic chemistry class, a place you see him everyday, of course, but this time you’re just (un)lucky enough to drop all your books off your desk at the end of the lesson.

Normally, you’d be rushing your ass straight out of there to book it to anatomy, but with the textbook spillage at your feet, you’re squatting and shoving notes into random books and piling them all up on the desk above you.

You didn’t notice, but Jeongguk squats next to you and begins to silently collect the papers that flew under nearby desks, placing them in a neat stack next to your books with a small, bunny grin on his face. You want to feel the resistance to scoff, but instead, you surprise yourself by smiling right back.

“Thanks,” you say quietly, standing and smoothing your skirt out over your legs, suddenly feeling the anxiety in the pit in your stomach rise up and threaten to spill over in the form of mordant words, but you bite your tongue as Jeongguk stands as well.

“No problem,” He says, turning to leave but you catch the lingering glance he gives you. His eyes lay upon yours far too long but nonetheless he turns away and rejoins his group as they filter out the door.

The fourth time you have a run-in with Jeongguk is different.

You find him sitting outside your room, phone in hand. You almost stumble over his legs on your way to the dorm, looking down and finding him there was uncommon.

“What-”

“I got locked out.” He said flatly.

Your eyebrows furrowed, and you set your books down on the floor and took a seat next to him with an exasperated sigh.

“So...you’re expecting me to let you sleep in my room? My roommate is in there.” You say, looking up at him and letting your fingers tug at the length of your skirt until the fabric is covering your knees.

Jeongguk, once again, as always, looks amused at your attempt to lengthen your skirt on your legs, but says nothing about it, only nods with widened, innocent eyes.

“Don’t you have some party to attend to? A girl to fuck?” You tease, but his face seems to glaze over with a bilious, brittle look settled on his features as he glances down at you with a balanced gaze.

“No, in fact, I do not. Taehyung got kicked out--”

You tilt your head, “What? Kicked out of the dorm?”

Jeongguk shakes his head. “Kicked out of school. Couldn’t keep up with his grades, I guess. He has the key to the room because I lost mine.” He says, and you detect a hint of sadness lacing in his smooth voice as he exhales a sigh.

“Oh. That’s too bad.” You meander, looking down at your hands.

Jeongguk doesn’t elaborate but you’re curious, but instead he perks up and turns to you. “Please? Just one favor for tonight? C’mon, you owe me.”

Scoffing, you pick up your books and stand but the snarky words that want to escape your mouth don’t come out. Instead, you’re digging in your purse for the key to your dorm when--

“I don’t have my key.”

Jeongguk shifts to look up at you. “What?”

You plop your books on the floor next to Jeongguk and almost frantically search through your purse, opening every crevice and then moving onto your books when you remember the key is exactly where you had thought you’d taken it from -- a frequent place you forget it at -- the desk next to your bed.

He looks up at you with an open mouth. “Just bang on the door!” Jeongguk suggests, and stands up with you to accompany you in your attempt to wake your roommate up, but to no avail.

“Wake up!” You yelp, hitting the door with one last thump of your fist and looking to the ground, defeated.

“Why won’t she wake up?” Jeongguk asks, sitting back down in the spot you found him in.

You sigh. “She sleeps with earbuds on. Says, “She can hear the people in the hallway in the morning and the music drowns it out.’” You say in air quotes with a glance down at Jeongguk.

Suddenly, the door across from you opens with a whir of air, and a burly guy steps out.

“Can you guys, maybe, shut the fuck up? It’s like 1 am and some of us have early classes.” The guy says, his voice gruff with anger and sleep. You and Jeongguk nod with wide eyes, and the guy slams the door. Mere seconds go by before the two of you are bursting with laughter, the giggles almost theatrical and there’s no stopping them until you’re on the floor across from Jeongguk.

Laughter dies in your mouth as you look at him, his hair swept across his forehead and his eyes scrunched in uncontrollable cackling, a veiny hand resting on his stomach. He seems so carefree, so beautiful, so reckless in that moment and you’re awed at his ability to change his personality in minutes. You’re wary, you realize, to admit anything over Jeongguk because of the way you’ve seen him act, the way you’ve seen him live and in a way you’re envious because of his confidence. You can’t help but wonder if there is another side to Jeongguk that doesn’t show itself as often as his party-boy alternatives do, and for that, you tread cautiously because what if all of this is only a way to get you to fuck him? To give yourself up to him and to borrow him your heart only for him to crush it?

His giggling has calmed now, too, and you’re staring at each other with such an intensity that you’re left to wonder if Jeongguk’s thinking the same thing, thinking that maybe you want to kiss him, too. Your walls that protected you from him are crumbling, and you’re very aware of that as he leans forward and presses a gentle kiss to your awaiting lips, his hand moving to cup the side of your face as his tongue moves against yours in a mere desperation.

A minute passes and he pulls backwards, one hand still resting on your cheek then dropping but this time he whispers something, “Can we just stay here tonight?”

You nod, not fully understanding what he means but your head is unclear from the fireworks and smoke that clouded your thoughts thanks to his pretty, blood red lips. Gently, he pulls your backpack from where it lays and puts it on the ground, much like you had the night Jeongguk had offered to let you stay in his room for the night. His hand grasps your wrist as he pulls you to lay down next to him on the bag, and you’re left staring at him once again once he retracts his hands from your body. The two of you lay, a considerable amount of space between your bodies, but the urge to scoot closer to Jeongguk’s warmth is nearly impossible to resist.

Jeongguk laughs softly, “I didn’t really expect this to happen.”

You shake your head. “Me neither. But I, um. That didn’t mean anything.” You blurt, but Jeongguk’s face only flickers with what you think may be a speckle of hurt but a soft smile replaces itself on his face quicker than you can register.

“Yeah. Nothing.” He says lightly, his eyes on yours, then fluttering closed as the two of you lay opposite each other. Jeongguk shifts onto his back, two hands coming above his head in an attempt to make the backpack a little more comfortable.

You lay there, hands under your cheek and you’re thinking. It didn’t mean anything. The two of you kissed before, and there was nothing afterwards. Why can’t this be the same?

So you lay there, finally letting sleep succumb your mind under the florescent white lights, but what you also didn’t expect was finding yourself curled into Jeongguk early the next morning, his arm pulling you against his chest and it’s almost...peaceful.

What awoke you that morning for the second time was the slamming of a door and the voice of your long-awaited roommate, phone and bag in hand, eyes staring down at you with such an intensity you swore she was going to burn holes through your face.

Jeongguk was still dead asleep, his eyes fluttering with reeling dreams but you’re wide awake, immediately scrambling to move Jeongguk’s heavy arm off the dip of your waist.

“Y/N,” your roommate snapped, quickly and quietly, and you avert your gaze to make sure your recent bedtime-buddy hasn’t awoken before standing and smoothing your shirt down.

“What’s up,” you say flatly, hoping in some way she would randomly and completely forget this moment ever happened, the moment she saw you literally sleeping with the one person you swore was an enemy, a hot enemy at that, and just go to class.

But instead, she just takes your wrist in a crushing grip and proceeds to drag you into the room after kicking the door open with her heel, and spinning you around to face her.

“What the actual fuck were you thinking?” She asks, incredulous eyes raking in your disheveled appearance.

You huff, “You fucking forgot to leave the door unlocked again, Ji Su.”

Ji Su taps her foot, “Actually, it was your fault this time.” She says, slapping her hand against yours and when she pulls away, your silver key lay innocently in your palm.

Her mouth moves into a devious smile before she trots off, humming quietly as she makes her way down the stairs and you turn to look at Jeongguk. He looks so peaceful, with his hair swept to the side and one hand against his chest. You almost want to lay back down, but instead your foot meets his shin and you nudge him until his eyes shoot open and he’s looking pointedly at you.

“Wake up,” you mutter, opening the door to your room and seconds later Jeongguk follows, fists rubbing his bleary, sleep-endeared eyes. You stand in front of your bed, unsure of what to do as Jeongguk plops onto Ji Su’s bed and turns his head towards the wall. You’re sure he’s fallen back to sleep but then his head turns towards you, his almond brown eyes staring up at you staring down at him.

“There’s no way I’m waking up for the day yet,” Jeongguk says, putting an arm above his head and moving around to get comfortable. You look down at him in curiosity. He’s not your friend, he’s only here because he let you sleep in his room and now you’re repaying the favor. He’s not your friend. He’s NOT your friend. But then the feeling of his heavy arm draped over your waist and his breath coming out in warm puffs against the skin of your forehead this morning plague your thoughts, and oh, god. What is this?

“I’m going to go get something to eat. Don’t lock the door on your way out.” You say, and slam the door behind you.

By the time you get out of the dorms, you know exactly how you feel about Jeon Jeongguk.

Mostly.

He’s hard to read, but you’re pretty sure he thinks the two of you are friends now. With any luck, you’ll be able to avoid the messy situation of thinking you want anything from Jeongguk besides sex. You pause at that thought as you walk down the street towards the nearest coffee shop. You told yourself that the kiss in the hallway meant absolutely nothing, but did it mean anything to him? Did it really mean nothing to you? The way his face fell so slightly said otherwise, but you were trying not to think too deeply. Maybe that’s where your faults lie.

The door jingles as you step into the warm atmosphere, the air brimmed with the smell of strong, freshly brewed coffee and pastries. Your smile drops as soon as you see Jimin, Jeongguk’s friend who smokes cigarettes outside your building, and keep your eyes down as much as you can without being weird as you order your coffee.

“Y/N, right?” Jimin says, prompting you to look up warily at him. He has a small smile on his face, nothing like the way he looked at the numerous parties you’ve seen him at, rubbing his crotch all over some girl’s ass to loud rap music. Here he looks gentle and quiet, his shiny blonde hair falling to part on his forehead.

You nod, looking down again and back up at his face. Jimin’s smile grows a little, and then he says, “Jeongguk talks about you. It’s nice to finally put a face to a name.”

“He - what?” You ask, eyebrows shooting up in question. Jeongguk talks about you? What Taehyung had said at the party a few weeks ago echoes in your head once again, and you figure they’ve talked about you before. Finally smashing Y/N, nice!

Jimin’s smile doesn’t falter, “Yeah, we were all standing outside the dorm the week before Taehyung -” Here his smile does drop slightly before he continues, “-Before Taehyung left, and-”

At that moment, another customer walks up and interrupts Jimin. He smiles apologetically, and waves to you as you walk out the door, unsatisfied even as you sip your coffee.

It’s another week before you see Jeongguk again, him having done exactly what you had hoped he would do - leave the door unlocked, and ultimately, leave you alone.

He was hard to read. But from the way Jimin was saying, it was obviously Jeongguk had said something before about you. It didn’t seem like he was out to get you or anything, but in the depths of your mind the thoughts of you being a bet of some sort still filtered through your head.

You were on your way home via KTX train, having lugged two duffel bags full of clothes to have over winter break. There was a crying baby a few rows back, screaming on top of it’s lungs, and an elderly lady bickering with a conductor over ticket prices on your left. Even with your earbuds shoved in your ears, the world was still too loud, and with Jeongguk intruding every thought you had only magnified it all.

Arriving in Busan was always the same. It was a feeling you loved; hopping off the train and straight into your mother’s arms as she embraced you since you left back in August for school. The air was always cleaner here, with the ocean footsteps away and the quietness of seaside towns around every corner.

You threw the smallest of the two duffel bags into the corner when you stepped foot into your old bedroom, inhaling the sickly sweet smell of lavender and sea salt, a hard object falls from a side pocket on the bag and clambers onto the floor. You turn, and bend over to pick it up, and when you straighten again, the silver key to your dorm room is sitting in the middle of your palm. Was this a sign? A bad omen?

I don’t need this, you think, why is he always in the back of my head?

Huffing, you take the key and grasp it tightly as you walk out of the house, shuffling towards a secluded part of the beach. “Fuck this,” you mutter under your breath, feeling more than you ever wanted to about this. You didn’t want to think about what Jimin said, or how Jeongguk’s lips against yours felt like soft rose petals, or the heaviness of his arm around your waist. It wasn’t fair, this wasn’t fair, nothing is fair.

So you stand on the beach, and chuck the lone silver key as far as you possibly can out into the vastness the sea, hoping that like the key, everything would just immediately disappear. You look out towards the ocean and collapse onto the sand, sitting and crossing your legs to stare at the hazy, late evening sky. The ocean gently laps against the shore, and you take a deep breath.

“Y/N?”

You turn, and of course it’s Jeon Jeongguk. You’re almost angry, but as soon as you meet his eyes your back is to him again.

“I didn’t know you were from Busan.” He says, and you hear his feet kick the sand as he walks towards you. You’re a little numb, maybe from the cold Busan air or maybe from something else, you didn’t know.

“No parties to attend?” you say, no trace of a smile emerging from your face, and you can almost sense his hesitation.

Jeongguk sighs, “No.” He pauses. “Are you okay?”

You smile humorlessly. “Yeah. You’re just on my mind a lot lately.”

Jeongguk turns to you. “I am? Why?”

Chuckling, “What are we doing,” you say finally, turning to look at him. Jeongguk looks as lost as you feel, and as his brown eyes search yours, your resolve cracks and crumbles to the ground.

“What do you mean?” He asks quietly, turning away from you and looking down at his hands. You shake your head.

“Nothing, Jeongguk.”

It’s silent for awhile, the two of you staring out at the ocean until the sun is just about gone from the sky. Busan’s colors never fail to amaze you.

Jeongguk speaks up finally, ripping you from your sunset reverie.

“Can I tell you something?” He asks gently, and you nod. “I’m not like you think I am, Y/N. I’m not some dumb jock who only cares about the parties. I know that’s what everyone thinks of me, and I’m also not someone who sleeps with random people,” Jeongguk says, grumbling now, “even if it seems like it.”

You turn to him, eyebrows drawn together, and you shift backwards so the heels of your hands are digging into the sand like his are.

Truth is, that’s how you thought of him. He’s right when he says that’s what everyone thinks of him, because in the light everyone has seen him in, it’s true. It looks like he’s with a different girl every night, it seems like he lives for the frat parties, and he sure has it easy with his own private bathroom. In a way, it was easier for you to see Jeon Jeongguk like that, because to you, that image of party boy Jeongguk kept your feelings at bay.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, and you’re not sure why you’re saying it but you do. What else is there to say?

“It’s a defense mechanism, I think. It’s easier to pretend to be someone else.” He says, and you’re finally aware that maybe, just maybe, Jeongguk has a past like everyone else. Maybe he wasn’t always a frat boy, maybe at one point he was a momma’s boy and played pokemon and watched dramas.

“Why do you say that?” You ask.

Jeongguk shrugs. “I had a tough childhood. And I thought, maybe if I change my personality, people will like me more. And that’s what happened. All until you.”

Your heart leaps in your throat.

“You confuse the fuck out of me. I never know how to act around you because you’re too hard to figure out. And I’m not going to lie, I was totally ready to be rejected that first night I talked to you,” he looks over at you, “we really were out of vodka.”

And then you’re laughing, a chortling, borderline painful laugh and you’re not sure why, but Jeongguk begins to laugh too. It’s just like the time in the hallway where after laughing at the guy coming out of his room to yell at the two of you, you kissed:

You wonder if that’s going to happen again.

“I believe you,” you say finally, cracking a smile.

“I hate Taehyung for barging in. Then he goes, “Finally smashing Y/N!” Idiot. I hope you didn’t take that the wrong way.” Jeongguk says quickly, smiling at you apologetically.

You did. You totally took it the way you thought it was intended to be taken. Who wouldn’t take that statement wrongly? Jeongguk seems to notice your hesitation, and lunges forward with a string of apologies.

“I’m sorry, I know it sounded really bad and it made it sound like I was just in it because I could and I talk to him about you too much and-”

What prompts you to reach forward and grasp his hand, you don’t know. But he stops talking a mile a minute when you lace your fingers with his, sitting forward and looking down at your lap then back up at Jeongguk.

“I don’t really know how I feel about you but I really want to find out.” You say, and finally, after weeks of thinking about kissing him in the hallway, him kissing you on the floor of his dorm, your lips meet his for the third time, but the sparks pop and crackle this time more than they ever have before.

Jimin greets you with a smile and a wave, before pointing at the booth in the corner where Jeongguk sits with two coffees in front of him and notes sprawled out all over the place. His eyebrows are drawn together, and he’s deep in concentration before you sit down across from him and begin undoing your scarf from around your neck.

“How is studying for the exam going?” You ask breathlessly, having walked here in the blistering cold all the way from the science building on campus. Jeongguk looks up at you and smiles before handing you a pink highlighter. “Help. I’m dying.” He says, and you grin before grabbing one of his notebooks.

Later that night, the two of you pack up all his notes and his laptop into his bag and are ushered out by Jimin, who’s dying to close the place and go home. The snow on the ground muffles every noise there is at 11 PM on a Thursday night, and your gloved hand reaches out for Jeongguk’s.

“What happened with Taehyung?” You ask, and Jeongguk looks over at you with a glint in his eyes.

“He’s in Daegu, at a community college. He’s working on coming back here, though,” he says, and although you know he’s trying to sound neutral, he misses Taehyung.

You squeeze his hand and the two of you continue back to the dorms quietly. You take comfort in knowing his hand is solid in yours, grounding you here and keeping you tied to where you’re at.

You reach the dorms, and you don’t even glance at your own room before continuing on to the end of the hall where Jeongguk stays. Lately, you’ve been staying in there with the excuse that Ji Su stays with her boyfriend in his apartment across campus, but really, you’d rather not have to be separated from Jeongguk if you didn’t have to be.

Ever since the two of you came back from Busan, after spending three hours on the cold beach kissing in the sand on the first day there, things were different. Jeongguk began to show up at your dorm and you didn’t really mind (Ji Su sure did), and most of the time, you’d end up going back to his dorm and watching Netflix or battling him in Overwatch, but then things changed even more. He would ask you to meet him at coffee places, and by the second time you already knew what he orders and he knew your order.

You’d begun to hold his hand everywhere the two of you went together, prompting Jimin and Ji Su’s sly questions and assumptions. But in a way, you almost didn’t want to label whatever this was. Friends don’t really hold hands, but they spend the night in each other’s dorms. Friends definitely don’t kiss, but they help each other study.

But tonight, it was snowing and it was cold so when Jeongguk turned the light off, you waited about ten seconds before throwing the covers off your body and gently sitting down on Jeongguk’s bed.

“Jeongguk?” You whispered, and you could see the outline of his face in the darkness.

“Yeah?” He asked, sitting up on his elbows.

You look down at the floor before giving yourself ten seconds of courage and drawing your feet under you and laying down next to him, separated but close enough to feel his breath on your face. He seems to understand what you want then, because his arm comes under your neck, and you shift so your face is buried under his chin. Jeongguk moves so your bodies are pressed together, as close as they can be, and that’s when you know that you two are definitely, completely, not friends.

“So,” Ji Su starts, catching up to you as you speed-walk towards organic chemistry. You’ve been late to Professor Lee’s class six times this semester, and you can’t afford all the makeup work any longer.

You don’t stop, but Ji Su effortlessly keeps up with you as you barrel down the street. “You and Jeon, huh?”

Rolling your eyes, you ignore her.

“C’mon, Y/N! Spill! What are you two? Me and Jimin have money on this,” she snorts. That’s when you stop, causing her to slip slightly on the ice under her feet.

“You’re betting on me now?” You cry, and Ji Su nods eagerly. “Some friend,” you mutter as you shake your head and continue towards class.

“Really, though, Y/N. Am I not worthy of knowing what my best friend is up to with someone like Jeon Jeongguk?”

You whirl around, ready to point an accusatory finger in her direction when you stop and think about what he said back in Busan. Everyone knows him as this fuck boy who likes to party, and you almost forgot about that thanks to all the anime he begs you to watch with him and the 3 AM Overwatch battles and the caramel mocha frappuchinos he insists upon every visit to where Jimin works.

“Nothing. Now leave me alone. I have to go.” You say, and as you turn around your stomach sinks and your chest threatens to heave. Why are you crying, stop it! Don’t cry. There’s no reason to cry. There’s nowhere for the frustration to go anymore, it’s so pent up that you could stop right there and cry it all out on the street - but organic chemistry is calling your name and Jeongguk will have to leave your thoughts for a little while.

Jeongguk is there to pick you up from your lecture and the sight of him makes you want to cry and be relieved all at once. You’re left with three choices right now as you watch him watch you: cry from the frustration and confusion and run away, cry and run to hug him so he’ll be totally weirded out by you and won’t talk to you anymore, or kiss him on the mouth, grab his hand and go back to the dorm.

You pick the latter, although the willpower it takes not to let a few tears slip still pokes at your eyes.

Hiking your bag onto your shoulders, you make a beeline through a rush of people to get to Jeongguk and immediately press your lips to his. Jeongguk is taken aback, stumbling backwards before wrapping his hands around your waist and pulling his lips away from yours.

“What was that for?” He asks with a goofy grin on his face, and you wrap your arms around his neck as the words, “We should talk,” slip out of your mouth. His face goes sullen, but he still takes your hand as you walk out of the lecture hall despite the wide eyes and stares the others give you.

Once the two of you are out on the street, it deems a little harder to say what you actually thought you were going to say back inside. At the time, telling him that the two of you needed to talk about whatever this was sounded like a good idea in your head, but now all you want to do is pretend like those three words never came through your lips.

“What did you want to talk about?” Jeongguk asked, trying to keep the mood light with a cheery voice, but he already knew.

You squeeze his hand, swallowing hard. “I wanted to talk about us.”

Jeongguk is silent for a moment, but squeezes your hand. The two of you arrive at the dorm, and walk in. It’s weird, but you sit on the bed opposite to Jeongguk’s so you’re facing him. If he doesn’t want what you want - if he doesn’t want to label anything, you can’t let your feelings in the way. You can’t force him to do anything.

“I just. Ever since Busan, something has changed. We’ve changed.” You begin gently, and he’s picking at his fingernails. You sit up straighter. “I didn’t want to label this, whatever it may be, and I didn’t want to assume anything, you know?”

Jeongguk nods, thoughtful. “Me neither.”

You swallow hard. Here goes nothing. “I don’t really know what you want, Jeongguk, but I think...” you trail off, looking up at him, “I think I know what I want.”

Jeongguk looks tired for a moment and for the thousandth time, you wonder where he stands on all of this. When you first met him, everyone talked about how much of a frat boy, trust fund, spoiled brat he was. But now that you’ve seen this side of him - the nerdy side, the funny side, you’re almost positive that those people were wrong.

But something jabs at the back of your mind. Trust. You knew for a fact that throughout your entire college career up until now, you heard nothing but less than good things about the boy and you’ll be honest - you mostly tried to steer clear.

But now, Jeongguk was standing in front of you. His face was sullen and his mouth was pulled into this weird grimace - as if he was waiting for the fatal blow. But you weren’t trying to deliver that, because at this point you were hyper-aware of his hand in yours, fingertips brushing gently at the back of your hand and it was soothing.

“And what is it that you want, Y//N?” Jeongguk said quietly, and you were almost paralyzed for a moment. Over the months this boy had become so special to you, his quirks and weird faces and happy giggles made your day. But in the back of your mind there was just this off feeling that maybe, just maybe, the honey moon phase of relationships was real.

“I think I want...us. I want there to be an us.”

Jeongguk smiled lightly, sweetly, and stepped closer to press his lips against yours.

#bts #jeon jungkook #jeon jeongguk #kim taehyung #v #park jimin #kim seokjin #kim namjoon #jung hoseok #min yoongi #A NEW SERIESSSSSSSSSSSS #maybe?

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rainbowsend-jm · 5 years ago

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Chapter 1

The first time I got on a plane was the last time I saw my mother. I was a bundle of confusion and nerves as a man I had never met before held my hand and guided me down a balmy, seemingly endless hallway leading into a flying metal bird. My heart hammered against my ribcage as I set foot inside. A young woman with skin the color of bone and platinum blonde hair greeted us in a language I couldn’t understand. After looking at the tickets in the man’s hand, she pointed to our seats. The man nodded at her and told me to walk ahead.

Once we sat down, he showed me how to fasten my seatbelt and asked me if I wanted anything from the bag before he stored it over our heads. I shook my head. Even with my coat on, my skin prickled from the air conditioner. While I was normally a very outspoken seven-year-old, being in such an unfamiliar place stifled my words. Suddenly overwhelmed with nerves, I looked up at the man and asked for my María cookies just before he stored my bag. He opened my pink and blue backpack, the one I had covered with yellow and orange star stickers on the outside to patch the holes and pulled out a small golden cylinder. I took it from his hands, whispering a thank you before I carefully peeled the top of the packaging. After I took a bite, I looked out the window at the people loading the bags outside, counting each bag as it was thrown on the conveyor belt. I didn’t know the numbers beyond 30, so whenever I reached it, I started again.

When I left my house hours earlier, my mother hadn’t said anything about where I was going or why she wasn’t coming with us. Mami didn’t like questions, especially from me. She got angry when I asked too many and when mami got mad, she didn’t look at me or make any food. She told me I didn’t deserve anything from her because I had upset her. She acted differently when I washed the dishes, especially when I scrubbed the pots clean of all the concón that had stuck to the bottom; she always stroked my hair when I took out the trash or when I brought home a good report card from school.

I figured she would join us later at the church because she had told me to wear my prettiest dress; the one I wore to the Christmas service a few months before. It was the most beautiful thing I owned, and I loved it almost as much as I loved my storybooks. I didn’t care that Glenda, Doña Margarita’s mean daughter, had owned it first or that mami had told me I was going to burn in hell because I couldn't stop smiling at my reflection in the mirror, twirling over and over so I could see the bubble effect the skirt created. Every other dress I had was itchy and didn’t fit well. But this one, this one was red velvet and it felt soft against my hands. I had on white tights and shiny black shoes. Who cares if it made me so hot, I thought I would faint? Every time I put that dress on, I felt beautiful.

Mami had tied the bow in the back then turned me around by the shoulders, gripping me tight. She had worn her favorite dress, white and tight on her body, and had put on make-up that made her copper skin glow. Her brown hair was loose instead of being in tightly wrapped around her head in a tubi. I wondered if I would ever grow up to be as pretty as she was, though I believed I had a fair chance since our hair and skin were the same color. She brushed my hair back. Her amber eyes looked strange, like she had been crying all day again.

“Pórtate bien.”

“Si, señora.”

She didn’t say good-bye or even look at me as I got in the car. It was a nicer car than mami’s, especially because it had air conditioner which was a welcome relief in this hot night. Through the window, I saw Doña Margarita standing in her porch across the street, her eyes on mami. She looked unhappy, disapproving like she usually did when mami came home late from work. I followed her gaze. Mami kissed the man on the mouth, holding him tightly, and he let himself be kissed. He took her hands off him shortly after and got in the car with me.

As the car lurched forward, I looked at her through the back window, seeing her already small figure get smaller and smaller as the car drove away. I grew confused as we sped past our neighborhood church but didn’t dare ask anything. I thought then that we were going to a fancy party in Casa de Campo, the resort where mami worked. I had never gone to a party before. The man didn’t say anything, and I kept quiet the entire ride.

Now the people walking into the plane were fewer and fewer and I had finished all my cookies but mami still wasn’t here.

“Is mami coming?” I asked in English, my voice small.

“No.”

I was grateful he spoke English. Since I could remember, Mami had made sure all the movies and cartoons that I saw were in English. She said it was the best way to learn the language and to get a good pronunciation so nobody would tease me.

“Where are we going?”

The man kept his eyes ahead, looking at the people that boarded as they got into their seats.

“Salzburg, though first we stop in Frankfurt.”

“Where is Salzburg?”

“In Austria.”

The only countries I knew were my own, along with Puerto Rico, Haiti, Cuba, Jamaica and the United States. I didn’t know where Austria was, but it had to be far if we were on a plane to get there. I tightened my hold on the hem of my dress, rubbing the fabric over and over with my thumb. For a second, I wish mami was here. She wasn’t a source of comfort, but her anger and La Romana were all I had ever known. Why wasn’t she here with me? Why did she let me go with this foreigner? When would I go home? Was she sending me away because I hadn’t washed the dishes this morning?

“Why isn’t mami coming?” I said.

“Because she isn’t.”

It didn’t make sense. Was it because mami did not like planes?

Another woman dressed in navy approached our seats and asked us something in the same rough, chopped language I heard when we walked inside. She smiled at me, apparently waiting for an answer. All I could do was stare at her striped scarf. It looked like candy canes. The man answered in my stead in the same language. The lady pressed her hand against her chest, looking at me with a mix of pity and amusement before walking away.

“What did she say?”

“She asked if you wanted something to drink. I told her no. I don’t want you going to the bathroom until we are flying.”

“Is that the language you speak in Austria?”

He nodded.

“Will I have to learn it?”

“Only if you want to understand what people say to you.”

I did want to learn only I didn’t know if I could. I wished then I had something to hug, a doll or plush toy, anything soft. However, mami had never bought me neither of those things. She had said then I didn’t need anything beyond clothes, food, and God.

“Didn't Zuleika tell you who I am?” the man asked me suddenly, saying mami’s name with mild annoyance.

Why would mami tell me who he is? Mami didn’t really tell me anything. She just expected me to do my chores and behave. In fact, she always got upset when I asked her too many questions. It never occurred to me to ask her who this man was. I figured he was her friend. She never let me leave the house with anyone she didn’t know. But now… now I was afraid. What would happen to me? The fear threaded itself through my chest. I tucked my feet under me, trying to feel safe. I ventured a glance of the man seated next to me. He was staring. He hadn’t smiled once since I met him, but he didn’t look like a bad guy. I hoped he wasn’t a bad guy.

I shook my head.

His brows furrowed. “My name is Simon Rizek, Mariabella. I am your father.”

For the first time since we had left my house, I looked directly at him. His blond, ashen hair was cut neatly, and the shadow of a beard was already visible. He looked pale, like he had never been to a beach in his life. I had so many questions. Where had he been all this time? Why hadn’t I ever seen him before? Why did mami yell at me to be quiet and then cry every time I asked about him? Why did it take so long for him to come get me? Searching his face for something I could recognize, I noticed his eyes then, the color of shiny olives, just like mine.

“Is that why you’re taking me to Austria?”

“Yes.”

“Am I going to live with you?”

“As long as you don’t get into any trouble and remain useful,” he said as he turned his gaze towards the front once again, “you will always have a home with me.”

Useful? I frowned. I didn’t understand what he could mean by that. Were all fathers like that? Everything I thought a father should be I had learned from watching ‘A Little Princess’ after school. All this time I had hoped my father had been lost in a war somewhere far away where he had forgotten about me and that once he remembered, he would come to save me from my Miss Minchin, my mother. He would take me away and we would live happily ever after in a big house full of dolls and books. Now here he was, flesh and blood and without any war scars that I could see.

“What should I call you?”

“Papa.”

Just like Sara, I thought.

If he was really my father, I didn’t want him to treat me like mami did. I didn’t want him to yell at me when I didn’t take the chicken out of the freezer in the morning or yank my hair because I forgot to water the flowerpots in the front porch. Maybe, if I did my chores, he would buy me a new dress, one that wasn’t owned before by a girl who hated me. Maybe, if I didn’t make him mad, he would love me. I wanted someone to love me; I wanted to feel loved more than I wanted to eat.

“Do you love me?” I said.

He remained silent for some time before turning to look at me.

“Does Zuleika love you?”

I didn’t know. She said she did, but I didn’t believe her. I shrugged.

“Then why do you need me to love you?”

“Because you’re my papa,” I said, my heart fluttering because of what I called him.

“I am your papa, Mariabella, but that doesn’t mean I love you right away. What have you done to deserve love?” he said, his eyes on me.

I frowned, not knowing what to say. I wondered what Sara had done to make Captain Crewe love her like he did. But maybe ‘A Little Princess’ had been wrong all along. Maybe fathers don’t love their daughters just because, just like mothers don’t love their daughter just because. After all, mami said she loved me, but she didn’t come with us. Mami said she loved me, but she cried when she looked at me. Mami said she loved me, but then she didn’t when I couldn’t figure out what she wanted me to do. Why did I need love? Why did I think I was emptier without it? Was it because of the movies? Or the books? All I knew about love I had learned from mami and mami’s love didn’t feel good. It didn’t feel right, like a shoe placed on the wrong foot.

“All love does is weaken you,” he said as he closed his eyes and he settled his head against the headrest.

One of the ladies with the navy-blue dresses closed the door. The disembodied voice of a man came from above, speaking in that strange language I would have to learn. As the plane raced down the runway, tears suddenly slid down my cheeks. Panic pressed against my chest as I struggled not to make a sound. I didn’t want to wake him. I gripped the seat as we soared through the night sky, whispering a prayer to the Virgin Mary so she would spare me if the plane fell.

We kept climbing and I dared to look outside the window as I left behind all I had ever known. The tears didn’t stop as I tried in vain to figure out why mami had sent me away. Was she still angry that I had taken an extra-long nap after sweeping our backyard and had forgotten to give Doña Margarita the sazón she made? Did she notice that I took her cellphone when she was showering to play a video game? What could I do to make her forgive me and let me come back home?

The flight attendant from before returned and realized I was crying. She told me in English that her name was Annika and she told me not to cry, that the plane was perfectly safe. I couldn’t articulate the reason for my tears, so I just nodded, relieved that someone else above papa spoke English. She brought me water and vanilla ice cream with warm, buttery chocolate chip cookies from the front. I ate it all, shivering as I tried to catch my breath between the tears. After I had tired myself out, Annika took me to the bathroom so I could wash my face and pee. She then handed me my backpack from where papa had stored it, along with a blanket and a kit that contained a coloring book, colored pencils, a puzzle, lots of stickers, playing cards, and other interesting things. I thanked her and she smiled at me before walking up the long aisle. I busied myself counting stars, coloring or reading my books. I added new stickers to my backpack. I thought of mami and I wondered if she was thinking of me, too. Would she regret what she did and get on another plane to come pick me up? I must’ve fallen asleep because when I opened my eyes, the sun colored the sky pink. Annika returned with a tray with a fruit plate and a bread shaped like a crescent with butter on the side. I nibbled at the bread.

Papa didn’t wake up until we landed in Frankfurt. I cried when I waved goodbye to Annika, her kindness a balm I so desperately needed. If papa noticed, he didn’t say.

After a shorter plane ride, we finally landed in Salzburg, a land with no palm trees and thick with snow. I was numb from the cold and the terrible grief that I couldn’t articulate. Nothing looked familiar here. Not the trees, not the streets, not the shiny cars, not the people with their light-colored hair and skin, not the large mountains that wrapped around the city. Even the sky looked different, the blue not as bright.

Most of all, I was exhausted and unnerved by his silence. He only broke it to explain how far the bus stop was from his home (not very far) and how his neighbors were an elderly couple, Mr. and Mrs. Haas and that I was not to disturb them. The house wasn’t too far from the airport. It was a wooden cottage next to a large farm, surrounded by orchards and meadows. Next to the entrance, there was a tree as tall as the second floor of the cottage. Instead of leaves, its branches were covered with clumps of snow.

When he opened the car door for me, I got out and looked around me, searching for anything familiar. Snow smothered every inch of land with its mantle. I stepped forward, noticing how it swallowed my footsteps as if it was trying to devour all of me. Suddenly my red velvet dress and my thin white stockings were not warm enough. The snow soaked my legs and snuck into my bones. I looked down, taking note how my white stockings matched it and how it surrounded us, quiet and unyielding. I wanted to tell papa that I didn’t like this place, that it was too quiet, that I wanted mami, but his anger was not one I was familiar with and I didn’t want to meet it so soon. If he threw me out of the house the way mami did whenever her anger took over, I couldn’t just walk over to the colmado to wait until he calmed down.

Were there even colmados in Salzburg?

Slowly, the realization that I had nowhere else to go dawned on me. I closed my eyes, wishing I could dissolve into the snow and have the wind carry me back home.

“Virgencita, please,” I whispered once more to the Virgin Mary, hoping she was still listening even if I was far away, asking her grace me with an instant miracle.

“Mariabella,” I heard papa behind me, his voice anchoring my dissipating spirit to the ground. “Come inside.”

I opened my eyes to the disappointment that I was still corporeal.

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urdamage · 3 years ago

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✧ valentine + kit

kit has been in shock since he first laid eyes on sparrow running towards him in the mall. not once in his life has he ever gone through something so terror enducing, so upsetting, so horrific. images of dakota’s murder have been playing in his mind over and over again since he was first there to see it, and every shadow that graces his apartment frighten him as he no longer trusts even the sunlight around him. his parents haven’t called him. he assumes they either don’t know or that his father refuses to check in on him after what he’s done to ruin their relationship; he wonders endlessly what will happen between them but his wondering is always interrupted by scenes from the attack playing in his mind.

in such shock, kit doesn’t know what to do with himself, in fact, since returning home he’s not done anything aside from sit on his couch and stare blankly - not counting his few bathroom trips or the time he fell flat on his face off of his couch after falling asleep. he jumps at the sound of the knock on the door, but he sighs out of relief upon peeking through the peephole on his door and seeing a friendly face, one so far from the masked faces his mind won’t shake out of mental view. he opens the door, and only then does he realise that he’s still crying. “sorry.” he apologises for his bad manners out of instinct, his voice almost inaudible. “you can…” he doesn’t even finish his sentence. instead, kit leaves the door open and he walks back towards his couch, the shock doing strange things to his ability to function.

valentine’s heart broke when he saw the state his friend was in , but he could understand it all too well . the second valentine woke up in the hospital he had begun to cry , and he was sure his tears didn’t stop for weeks afterwards . having such vivid memories of going through the same pain - despite knowing how different their situations were , and recognising that the two were individuals with their own unique experiences , feelings and reactions - it worked to help valentine understand just how awful of a time kit must be going through right now . “ hey kitty . ” he greeted him , using his softest tone of voice , his brow furrowed with concern as he stepped into the apartment and closed the door behind him . “ wait there merry . ” he told the dog , who obediently laid down on the doormat and got comfortable without question . he stepped towards the couch where kit sat , pulling his backpack off of his back and placing it on the floor as silently and carefully as he could . the last thing he wanted to do was anything that might upset his friend or send him spiralling into an even worse state .

“ i , um . ” he swallowed thickly , feeling anxious with the pressure of trying to navigate someone going through so much - but he would gladly do it a million times over if it meant he could help the other in any way . “ i brought you something . i don’t know , it kind of … it didn’t feel right showing up empty handed , you know ? ” he explained briefly . he didn’t know how much kit could comprehend as he stared so vacantly , but he felt it would be best to speak as normal regardless . “ i didn’t want to get like , balloons or a card or any of the kind of stuff you might normally gift to someone going through something . ” he navigated the conversation as carefully as possible . “ i hated that kind of stuff when victor … and then when i was hurt . ” he shrugged , not getting into irrelevant details when he didn’t have to . “ i was at work when i found out , and i picked this up because i know you always say you wish you had a merry of your own and … i don’t know , i thought this could be the next best thing , you know ? ” he pulled out a fuzzy , plush chocolate labrador toy and he handed it over , then sitting next to his friend . “ even though the real merry , and myself , is , we’re - we can hang out with you as much as you want , if you wanted … if you want company . ”

#trauma tw #∘₊✧────── valentine ortiz ; interaction #valentine & kit

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divinebird · 8 years ago

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the good life

pairing: sheith (shiro/keith) wc: 4,778 summary: Shiro and Keith’s daughter experiences new things, like popsicles and fireworks. note: for Sheith Summer Week Day 4: Popsicles / Fireworks

{AO3}

It’s hot.

At least, that's the excuse he’s using as he opens the freezer to quickly grab his cold treat. He pushes on it until the wrapper opens with a small pop, humming happily over the artificial grape flavor. He grabs a small cup from one of the cupboards and sets it on the counter, just in case he needs a placeholder for his popsicle.

As Shiro leans against the sink, enjoying his sweet treat, he starts to hear tiny footsteps. In the shadows that stretch across the living room, he can see small flashes of red and purple.

His daughter enters the kitchen a moment later, wearing denim shorts and a lavender top that has stars stitched onto it while her black hair is loose, the shorter strands pinned away from her face with a white clip in the shape of a moon. She’s hugging her stuffed Black Lion plush close to her chest, pouting after she glances around the room once—somehow just missing him.

“Papa?” she calls out and walks farther away from him, eyes on her light-up shoes which flash with every step. “Where you?”

Shiro tries not to smile. “I’m right here, baby.”

She whirls around and releases a small, surprised gasp before running over to him. He moves his hand back to drop his popsicle in the cup, peering down at her when she raises her arms and hops a few times. “Up, up!” she says when he does nothing, a hint of a scowl that’s all Keith making its way onto her face. “Papa, up!”

“Alright, alright, no need to give me that face.” With two hands beneath her armpits, he picks her (and Black Lion) up with ease and sets her on his hip. “There we go, all good! Now, give me a kiss?”

A giggle leaves her before she turns her face away.

“You don’t want to give your Papa a kiss?” Shiro fake sniffles. “Not even a tiny one?”

“No!”

“What if I just take one?”

“No take!”

“Maybe Black will accept my kisses.”

He plucks the plush from her arms and raises it up, puckering his lips in its direction and making kissy noises. His hold is loose on it so she takes it back easily, and he grins when she kisses his cheek with a loud mwuah before hugging him.

“Thank you, Clem.” Shiro pokes her stomach. “Where’s Daddy? Is he still getting ready?”

Clementine nods and then peers around him. She points at the cup, only the stick left inside since the popsicle has long since melted, and asks curiously, “Juice? For me?”

“No, it’s not juice.” He dumps the contents in the sink and heads over to the freezer, switching her to his other hip so he can hold onto her with his bionic arm. “It was a popsicle. Do you know what that is?”

She shakes her head and then wiggles around, obviously a sign that she’d like to go down. He sets her down and sees that she steps back so she can watch him. “It’s like ice cream,” he explains as he opens it and grabs a cherry flavored one, laughing at the way her eyes go wide. “And it’s very yummy.”

“Mine?” Clementine asks, one hand reaching up and doing a grabbing motion.

“What do we say when we want things?” Shiro walks over to the small table they have in the kitchen, sitting down on one of the chairs and peeling the wrapper off as she edges closer. She reaches for it again and he pulls it away, speaking more sternly. “Clem, what do we say?”

There’s a light smack as she presses her hands together, shaking them back and forth as she peers up at him. “Please?” she asks in the smallest voice, violet eyes growing wet. She’s struggles with her Ls when saying that word, for some reason, so it sounds like she’s saying pwease every time. “Pwease, Papa? For me?”

Shiro has to take a deep breath, hand over his chest like he can physically feel the tug on his heart over how cute his daughter is. “Okay, sweetie, you can have some.” He finally answers, feeling another tug when her face lights up with happiness. “Do you want to come up here and sit with me? Or do you want to hold it by yourself?”

“Sit,” she answers and hands over her plush, waiting until Shiro sets it aside before trying to pull herself up onto his lap. Shiro lets her do it on her own, biting back a laugh when she releases a frustrated huff after several attempts. “Help?” she asks, looking up at him with sad eyes.

He sets her down on his thigh, holding the red colored popsicle close to her mouth. “Taste it,” he instructs after she stares at it for several seconds, bringing it up to his own and licking it. “Like that.”

Clementine leans forward and tentatively does the same, smacking her lips together and eyes lighting up over the taste. The popsicle is then taken out of his hand, Shiro helping her hold it carefully after taking off the wrapper and letting her enjoy it on her own.

This is when the regret starts to settle in, wishing he had grabbed an extra for himself. He waits for a few minutes and then speaks,

“Can I have some, Clem?”

Clementine frowns down at the popsicle and then abruptly shoves it into his face, smearing it across his mouth. It’s melting a bit, droplets falling onto his shirt and most likely leaving behind red stains. He doesn’t need to look down and check since he chose to wear a white one today, shrugging it off and breaking a small piece of popsicle away with his lips.

And so it continues like that, Shiro breaking off pieces whenever it’s held out to him and Clementine licking up the cold treat as well as her hands when too much of the juice trails downward. When they’re close to finishing it he looks around for a napkin, freezing when a sigh comes from the doorway.

“Really? You two just had to get dirty now? We’re supposed to already be on our way…”

Shiro glances over at him and takes a moment to appreciate Keith’s appearance. He’s wearing a loose red shirt with thin black and white stripes, dark blue jeans folded up at the ankles with red sneakers to top it all off. Shiro doesn’t care that it’s simple because, to him, Keith looks nice in everything.

“You look good,” he offers, eyes on the flash of skin when Keith shifts and causes the shirt to bunch up a bit.

“I’d say the same but I’m pretty sure the red stains aren’t a design.”

Shiro can only offer a sheepish smile, glancing down at Clementine’s outfit to see the damage that’s been done. Both her shirt and shorts have cherry juice all over it, face smeared with it as well. She doesn’t seem too concerned about it, holding up what’s left of the popsicle in Keith’s direction.

“Daddy? You want?” Clementine cheerfully inquires, more of the juice dripping onto Shiro’s jeans. “It’s yummy!”

“I’m sure it is,” Keith says dryly, walking over to the sink and grabbing the small washcloth resting on top of the faucet before running it beneath the water. “Not right now, baby. We’re gonna go eat, remember? With all your aunties and uncles?”

Clementine pouts, holding it out more insistently as Keith returns. “Pwease have?”

“Sorry, you’re using that on the wrong dad.” Keith gives Shiro a pointed look before focusing on their daughter. “Finish it up so I can clean you, okay?”

“Kay,” Clementine agrees happily and does so eagerly, nearly poking Shiro’s eye out when she holds the stick back to him. “Papa, take.”

Shiro curls his arm around her midriff as Keith begins to wipe her face, holding onto her tightly while he reads the joke off the stick. “Where do you look for kittens in the library?” He doesn’t wait for a reply (not that he’d get one beyond Keith’s sigh, as usual). “In the card cat-o-log.”

Keith rolls his eyes, wiping the mess from her hands now. “We’re gonna have to change your clothes, Clem.” he says, tugging on her shirt. “Look, you made a mess!”

Clementine looks down at her shirt and says, “Oops.”

After she’s taken back to her room by Keith to change, Shiro goes to the sink to wash his hands before doing the same.

Once done, in a grey shirt and black jeans tucked into his black boots, he checks to make sure the two of them have everything they need. The things that they’re bringing were packed and placed on the couch the moment they all started getting dressed but it never hurts to double check, slipping his phone into his pocket once he’s sure everything is there.

“Where’s Clem?” Shiro asks when Keith returns without her.

“She said she has to kiss the other Lions goodbye or else they’ll be very sad,” Keith explains. Lance had made all five for Clementine and gifted them to her for her first birthday, which quickly became her favorite present. She didn’t go anywhere without at least one or two. “But I told her that the actual ones will be there so it won’t be long.”

In comes Clementine, not even a second later. “Ready!”

Now dressed in black overalls and a plain white shirt, Clementine hops toward the door with her Black Lion plush back in her arms and her Red Lion plush peeking out of the small backpack. Her shoes flash with every jump, and continue to do so as she stomps impatiently in place by the door. “Hurry, hurry!” she shouts, even though both Keith and Shiro are in the living room with her. “Let’s go, let’s go!”

“She really wants to see them, doesn’t she?” Shiro comments as he shoulders the bag full of store-bought cookies and cupcakes. He peeks inside to make sure the sparklers are in there, bought on a whim with the idea of Clementine waving them around with everyone.

Maybe it’ll ease her into liking the fireworks they’ll pop later in the night. They still packed some noise-cancelling headphones just in case, aware that the loud sounds coming from them could hurt her ears.

“Like you don’t know that she’s been asking for weeks already,” Keith grabs the diaper bag that’s resting on the couch and then picks her up, opening the door wide enough for Shiro before exiting the house.

Shiro locks up the house while Keith is strapping Clementine in her car seat, placing the bag in the trunk after doing so before going to the driver’s side to start the car. Both Lance and Pidge have made fun of their van, claiming that it’s the standard kind a soccer mom would buy. They instantly quelled their comments beneath the force of Keith’s glare though, but Shiro swears he still hears their snickering whenever they drive up in it.

Keith is in the passenger seat about a minute later and then they’re off, driving with only the sound of Clementine’s babbling as she plays with her plush toys.

While there aren’t many people driving right now, it still takes some time to get to the desert that they’re all so familiar with (even Clementine, who would only come with the promise that they’ll see the Lions that love her as much as she loves them). The closer he gets to the shack that still remains standing, the easier it is to see all five towering forms which sends a tiny gasp into the air.

“They’re here!” she exclaims in surprise, like Keith hadn’t told her that they would be. Shiro shares a smile with him and parks beside the other cars, Keith already getting out before Shiro’s even turned it off to get Clementine out as quick as possible.

“You have to say hi to everyone first,” Shiro reminds her, turning around to lightly tap her nose just so he can see it wrinkle cutely. “And then you can play by the Lions after you eat.”

“But not all night,” Keith adds. “We’re going to be doing something fun when it gets dark.”

They exit and lock up the van without trouble, Clementine leaving behind the stuffed lions but keeping her backpack.

With one hand in Keith’s and the other in Shiro’s, their daughter marches between them—lighting up the small path with her shoes. Their friends are already there, sitting in the plastic chairs that surround the long table that has food laid out across it.

The eyes of Black and Red Lion light up when they’re close enough, and Clementine giggles over their audible purrs. Shiro feels a nudge against his mind and opens it up, letting the familiar warmth of the Black Lion wash over him and feeling a part of him settle with her presence. It’s true that their bond hasn’t wavered even with the distance between them, but whenever he’s close to Black he feels truly complete, something that she agrees with.

Judging by Keith’s content sigh, he’s done the same thing.

“Finally, you’re here!” Lance throws his arms into the air. “Thank God! I was withering away while we were waiting! Hunk wouldn’t let us eat until everyone arrived and you two just happened to be the last.”

“You should have just ate without us,” Shiro tells Hunk, setting the bag down on one of the chairs so he can unpack it. He lets go of Clementine’s hand and sees that Keith has started leading her to everyone so she can deliver a kiss to their cheeks as a greeting, as she always does whenever they all assemble. “It wouldn’t have been a big deal to us, you know.”

“I know,” Hunk sets the cookies and cupcakes next to the other desserts, smiling at him. “But I felt like that wouldn’t be fair for the two of you. Besides, we didn’t actually wait that long; Lance is just exaggerating.”

“As usual,” Pidge cuts in, directing a grin up at Shiro. “By the way, I’ve been told to tell you that the three of you are coming over to dinner or my brother will come over and drag you there by himself. He says it’s not fair that I get to see you more than he does.”

“Tell him that he has to ask Clementine. If she agrees, then we’ll go.”

“That’s gonna be a bit hard since the last time you were over, she kicked Matt for taking away her plush.”

“Let’s be honest, he deserved it. Everyone knows how much she loves them.”

There’s a tug on his pants and he already knows who it is, crouching down to pick up Clementine. He leans down so she can kiss Pidge’s cheek, and walks over to Hunk to let her do the same.

“I see that you’re wearing your shoes,” Hunk says, giving one of them a poke. She lightly kicks in response. “Do you like them?”

“Love!” Clementine says, extending her legs to show them off. “Thank you!”

“You’re welcome, Clem! I’m happy that you love them so much!” Pidge says with a bright grin, and then lowers her voice when she meets Shiro’s gaze. “We can always make another pair if she grows out of them, it’s not that hard.”

“I’ll let you two know,” Shiro promises, sitting down in one of the chairs and fixing Clementine on his lap. “We should probably get some food in this child before she gets super grumpy. She’s excited to see the Lions.”

This is when Lance cuts in, plopping down in the seat across him with Allura and Coran taking the ones near him. “Yes, please!”

Shiro helps Clementine with her food and then passes her off to Keith once he’s done with his own plate so that way she can continue while Shiro eats, savoring his meal because Hunk’s cooking is probably the greatest in the whole universe. He relays this thought to the man, who beams back at him and looks proudly at his food.

“I’m still trying to get even better at it, though.” Hunk says. “I’m getting close to opening up my own food place, I think. It’s really exciting.”

“We’re all happy for you, Hunk.” Shiro says as everyone nods, and he thinks he sees the faintest blush on Hunk’s cheeks.

After defeating Zarkon and all the Galra that wished to follow in his footsteps, they couldn’t really go their separate ways; Too much time was spent together to even think about being too far apart. They all may live in different places, sure, but it has yet to sever their everlasting bonds with each other.

Hunk has been working his hardest to get better at cooking, hoping to bring together alien and human ingredients to create the best meals. He even travels to other planets with Coran, learning their ways and applying it to the food back on Earth. He’s happy with this new life he’s making for himself, his family feeling the same way.

Lance is the one they see the least, surprisingly enough, since he’s chosen to stick with Blue and spends his time doing jobs for other aliens. He’d admitted that space was hard to let go and wasn’t quite ready to let it go. He still makes time for them and his family but more often than not, they’re chatting with him through a holo screen.

Pidge chose to stay on Earth with her family, though she does travel out on occasion since she, her father, and brother have yet to grow tired of the stars. She usually sees the Olkari, still interested in their tech and the way they make it work.

Allura, of course, feels as though she still has her duties to attend to as the Queen. Despite there being no throne to take, she still took on the title and frequently meets with their allies to strengthen their relationships. She always makes time to see them on Earth, still awed by the planet that’s so very different from everything she’s ever seen.

Even Shiro and Keith can’t resist the call of space, yet their trips come rarely since they have someone who needs them more than anything out there. They’ve taken her on rides in their Lions, which were demanded by said beings since they love her as much as she loves them, but they both agree that there’s no need to take her out there—it’ll be Clementine’s choice if she really wants to.

Said girl is eager to rush over to the lions so Shiro takes her to them. She pats each one on their paw, babbling to them and waiting for their rumble before moving onto the next. Red and Black get the most time, even crouching down low so she’s able to pet their fronts as if they were actual cats.

They might as well be, Shiro thinks as he hears their happy purring. Considering how they turn into one whenever she’s around.

Blue is the last one they see and she sits down on the dirt by her paw, taking off her backpack and pulling out a box of markers. Clementine’s old markings are still there from the last time she saw the Lion so she starts drawing in new spots, humming a little tune that Blue seems to counter with her own noises.

Shiro doesn’t prevent her from doing this, aware that Blue surprisingly likes the messy art that she creates. They all figured this out when Lance actually washed them off once, reducing Clementine to tears and receiving the cold shoulder from the Lion.

Keith arrives after some time has passed, sitting down on the ground beside them and holding three familiar-shaped treats. “Look at what Allura brought,” he says, the crinkling wrapper finally catching Clementine’s attention. “What’s it called again?”

“Ice cream!” she exclaims with joy.

“Popsicle,” Shiro corrects.

“Popsics!” Clementine cheers and, well, it’s close enough so Shiro leaves it be. She drops her markers and scrambles onto Keith’s lap, leaving Shiro to pick them up and place them back in her bag. “Mine?” she asks, pointing at one.

“Yes, you can have it,” Keith says and Shiro plucks one out of his hands, unwrapping it and handing it over to her. “Don’t make a mess, okay?

Surprisingly enough, she actually manages to stay clean. Though it might be because the juice is dribbling down onto the dirt rather than all over her, Keith cleaning up any that drip down her arms before they fall even further.

When they finish they head back to the table where Shiro grabs a box from sparklers and, after a nod from Keith, lights one up to show off to Clementine.

She stares at it with an open mouth, hand hovering a few inches from it. “Ouch?” she asks with a frown. “It hurt?”

“Only if you’re not careful,” Shiro says, gently curling her hands around the bottom end of the sparkler stick. “You can wave it around like this, see?” He moves her hand in a circle for a few seconds and then lets go, not straying from her side in case she gets scared. “You can do it, right?”

Keith reaches down to take one out of the box, pushing himself out of his chair so he can crouch down in front of her. “Look, you can help light up mine.” He touches the sparkling tip to his own, setting it off and rising to his feet. “You can do shapes too! Watch!” A heart shape is traced into the air, followed by several smaller ones. “Don’t you want to try?”

Their daughter actually looks thoughtful, the sparkler slowly dying off in her hand. Shiro plucks it out of her hold as she thinks, grabbing another one so he can be ready. “Try,” she says with a nod, taking it from Shiro when he holds it out and raising it up to Keith so he can light it.

Soon enough she’s having the best time waving her hands to make circles and trying her best to copy the heart shapes that Keith makes. Shiro definitely takes a few videos of the cute sight, capturing her excited expression and Keith’s fond one.

After going through a few boxes, even passing it out to the others who either run around with them or simply sit in their seats and wave them around, he catches Lance’s wave—it’s time. He tosses the extra lighter his way and moves their chairs so that way they’re between Red and Black, sitting down and waiting for his family.

Clementine returns first, Keith not that far behind, and pats his knee. “More? Pwease?”

Shiro almost hands the rest over right then and there, fully aware of his weakness to her tiny plea and sad eyes. Keith laughs at him while he’s trying to deny her and doesn’t even stop when Shiro glares at him.

“It’s your fault,” Shiro grumbles. “She got it from you.”

Keith actually looks confused. “What do you mean she got it from me?”

“Really?” His voice is full of disbelief, recalling all the puppy-dog eyes and pouts that Keith shot his way whenever he asked for things. Shiro, of course, could never deny him after seeing a face like that and would give him whatever he wanted and more.

Maybe it’s a part-alien thing? Or a Kogane thing? Shiro will never figure it out--all he knows is that he easily succumbs to the two loves of his life every time they want something.

Clementine’s tiny stomp breaks him out of his thoughts, shoe lighting up red. “Papa, more?”

“No more,” Keith answers for him, thankfully, and pulls Clementine onto his lap once he sits down next to Shiro. Both Lions purr above them, obviously pleased at having them so close. “We’re about to see something better than sparklers.”

Hopefully. Shiro thinks, and knows that Keith just had the same thought when he grimaces for a moment. He smooths her hair back and leans over to plant a kiss on her head. “You’ll see, sweetie.”

There’s a woosh several feet away from them and Shiro keeps his hand on Clementine’s back when she startles at the boom that follows afterwards, leaning forward to catch her reaction. Her eyes are wide and fixed on the sky, the shocked expression on her face slowly morphing into one of awe. He quickly pulls his phone out to snap a picture, hearing Keith’s amused chuckle when she doesn’t even react to it.

After the next few fireworks, all she does is flinch when they blow but she doesn’t tear her gaze away from the colorful display. Shiro bets that if it were possible, she probably wouldn’t even be blinking.

Eventually, though, it comes to an end and all she does is cheer loudly and ask for more. Lance and Hunk, who also can’t resist her pleas, leave together to go buy more, and so they wait.

“We still have sparklers left,” Shiro says quietly, pulling out the last two boxes they have. “We can use up one right now and save the last for another day.”

“Good idea,” Keith whispers and then raises his voice. “Clem? We have more sparklers for you!”

She runs back in an instant, excitedly bouncing in place as Shiro tips one out to light up. After she takes it from him he sits down on the ground, just so he can have Keith in his lap. He places the box and lighter in Keith’s hands before wrapping his arms around him, pulling him closer to Shiro’s chest and moving his hair out of the way so he can press a kiss to the nape of his neck.

The sight of their daughter looking so overjoyed, giggling as she runs in circles with a sparkler, brings a strong feeling of contentment to Shiro. He closes his eyes and hums, lightly brushing his thumbs across the scar on Keith’s stomach.

Keith shifts in his arms and then fingers brush through his tuft of hair, Shiro finally peering at him after several moments of this. “You good?” Keith asks while he eyes the curve of his lips.

Shiro doesn’t answer, leaning forward to kiss him slowly instead. He can feel Keith’s smile and that causes him to do so as well, feeling Keith shudder when he brushes his finger along his spine as his hand trails up higher along his back. He skims the edge of the binder and almost makes a noise when nails lightly drag across the hint of scruff that’s starting to grow out, ready to deepen the kiss.

They’re interrupted, of course, by their baby.

“Gimme kiss, gimme kiss!” Clementine chants, the words forcing them apart. Shiro tries not to express his satisfaction at seeing how dazed his husband looks, instead pulling Clementine closer and kissing her forehead.

“There we go!” he says, prodding Keith’s side to get his attention. “A kiss for Clem!”

“Daddy, kiss!” Clementine says next once she turns to Keith, beaming when he bows his head and plants one on the same spot. She gives him one in return, on his cheek, and then Shiro gets one as well—the wet kind, sure, but the action still warms his heart. “Love you, Papa! Love you, Daddy!”

“Love you too, baby.” Shiro replies with a smile, the statement echoed by Keith.

Hunk and Lance return a few minutes later with more fireworks, as promised, and start working on lighting them up. He drapes his arm across Keith’s shoulder when he moves to sit beside him, the other around Clementine as she takes the spot between his legs. The three of them watch the fireworks together, surrounded by their friends and their Lions—a peaceful sigh leaving his lips.

There's no more fighting to be done and his arm is just an arm, replaced with one the Olkari crafted for him after the other had been destroyed. He doesn’t mourn it, though, happy to have a bionic limb that’s no longer able to hurt people.

The nightmares won't completely go away but sleep has gotten easier; the knowledge that his happiness will still be there when he wakes is a helpful truth that gets him through the nights. Even then the proof of it is solid and real, one having been by his side throughout almost all of it and the other brought into the world that they made safe.

He’s good.

#sheith #;writes #sheithpositivityweek

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sempervirens · 8 years ago

Text

This not-so-short-anymore story is dedicated to @charminglyantiquated and her magnificent @elsewhereuniversity comic which has exploded all over my brain.

Read chapter two here!

Nobody ever parks in Lot C after dark.

It’s not because of the Beast. It’s because Lot C is in the very back of campus, way too far from Everything of Importance. You’d have to walk a quarter mile before you reached anywhere that sells coffee, almost a mile to the library. The nearest structure is a low sprawl of administrative buildings, but even they don’t park in Lot C after dark. They come to work early, and leave before sunset.

It was a bitch to get my meal card replaced when I’d lost it. They kept shutting down that stretch of slumped old admin offices before I’d finished with my afternoon Physics Lab. My lab partner would laugh at me.

“You’ll have to eat out of the trash again. Poor Moonie. Soon enough you’ll turn into a raccoon,” she would coo at me, an unattractive smirk wrinkling her nose.

I didn’t like the way she said it. I didn’t like a lot of things she said. Sometimes I felt like she wished bad things to happen to me, just so she could snicker at my misfortune. I think it was her smile that did it. Whenever she smiled, I got the feeling she knew something that I didn’t. She liked it that way.

I didn’t mind it too much. The one thing she didn’t know was Physics.

To be honest, I’d never even thought about Lot C until I had to go replace my meal card. I lived in the dorms on the other side of campus. My classes were mostly in the central part of campus, in the big glass-and-metal science building that looks like something out of Star Trek crash landed on a concrete slab. I heard that the architecture department had designed it themselves. Those artists have no sense of practicality.

Every once in a while, I would hike all the way to the top of the hill to visit Dr. Forsythe and use his telescope. I use the term “hill” for lack of a better word. I’m not familiar with any words in the English language for “looks flat from the bottom, but at the top your legs hurt and you can see all the way to Jurassic Park”.

In comparison, Parking Lot C is out there somewhere between Skull Island and Gilligan’s Island, just above Atlantis.

Everybody Knows about the Beast of Lot C. Well, everyone has heard about the Beast. Nobody has seen it, and how much can you really Know if you’ve never seen the damn thing?

I used to Know it didn’t exist, but now I’m not so sure.

My friend, Jenny, has been missing for four days. It took me three to track down her car to Lot C. At first, I thought it was an abandoned wreck from a previous year. One headlight was smashed in. The roof was dented, and rusting from the weather. A thick cake of fallen leaves had plastered across the windshield, making the interior look dark and dusty. It was hers, though. I would have recognized the dopey little Goomba plush in the back window anywhere. Her boyfriend had sent it to her for her birthday last month. The front passenger seat was buried in thick Engineering Textbooks, notebooks covered in doodled patterns, and a stack of Beyoncé albums.

I felt sick to my stomach. Something very bad had happened to Jenny. How long had this car been sitting here? The rusted roof crumbled under my fingertips. All four tires were flat. Just last week we had driven this exact Honda Civic out to the river in Sumwere. No rust, four tires, no dust or cracked windshield. Is it possible for one person to wreck a car this much in one week? And where had Jenny run off to?

We had planned to drive into town this weekend. We were going to go to the record store and I was going to pick out my favorite old school rap albums.

“They’ll be really hipster, right?” She had asked with a twinkle of laughter in her eyes.

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I mean, they might be a little esoteric…”

“Ha!” She blurted, ignoring my roommates hissed demands for quiet. “You’re such a geek!” She laughed, fully aware of the irony as she packed up her Bowser-shell backpack. And then she was gone.

Yesterday, I called her parents. The two of them had somehow turned Utterly Useless into an art form. They talked around my questions for a whole hour before I realized that they didn’t even know which daughter I was asking about. I deleted their phone number.

I called the police after that. The desk clerk had me on hold for forty-seven minutes. When she finally returned to my call, she told me that no one had filed a missing-persons report, so there was no investigation in progress. I would have to come down to the station to fill out the necessary paperwork, but, being as the station is six miles away and my only ride had vanished off the face of the earth, I politely hung up on her.

When she didn’t show up to Calculus this morning, I knew she had to be dead or something. Nobody skipped Calculus. Anyone who skipped Calculus found themselves trapped in that circle of Hell where you worked yourself to near-death, all-nighters galore, and yet never caught up. Jenny would have rather had all her teeth pulled out than miss that class. Which is why I started walking at night, and how I found her car under the spasmodic flickering of the broken streetlamp in Lot C.

I couldn’t seem to catch my breath. The last threads of hope I had, frayed and worn as they were, had finally snapped. Jenny hadn’t had a bad week of school. She had flipped out over her project deadlines, hopped in her car, and bailed out without a word. She hadn’t gone anywhere, which was somehow so much worse.

I pressed myself against the back seat window. The plastic frame of my glasses clattered against the smooth glass as I strained to read any of the haphazard scraps of paper I could find, desperate for a single clue of where to search next. Her tiny handwriting was impossible to decipher.

“Come on!” I beat my hand against the glass. “Give me something! Where the hell are you?!” The only reply was a cruel aching in my hand and the whispered laughter of wind in the trees.

Scowling, I slipped my phone from my pocket to check the time. If I wanted to make it to the Astronomy Club discussion on solar systems, I would need to grab dinner and drag myself up that unbelievable hill as fast as possible.

“Damn,” I grumbled as I blinked the glowing rectangles of my phone screen from my vision. “I try her one more time.” If I couldn’t see Jenny’s phone in the car, then maybe she still had it with her. I took a slow breath, then touched her name on the screen.

Ring. Ring.

Then, farther away, the Star Wars Imperial March tooted in return, my personal ringtone on her phone. I heard it, but did not see it. The car was wrapped in gloom, now that the sun had coasted below the trees. I whirled around in a panic. My heartbeat pounded in my ears almost as loud as the horns of the Imperial March. The light was fleeing in a hurry, turning the shrubbery and decorative trees into wild, spindly things of shadow. My own shadow split three ways as the last beams of solar radiation broke through the dense trees at the edge of the lot. Above me, that broken streetlamp sent messages in morse code--Short flicker, long flicker, short flicker, short flicker, short flicker, long flicker--over and over again. The phone kept ringing.

Angry and impatient, I looked up at the annoying streetlamp to give it a good hateful glare. Looking back at me was Jenny’s pink phone, perched so delicately at the top of the lamp.

“What the-”

I tried to wrap my brain around how it got up there, but the strain was far too much. It had to be a joke, someone was pulling an elaborate prank on me. Was Jenny in cahoots with my Physics Lab partner? “Poor Moonie,” she always sneered.

I turned away. Whatever was going on would wait until after Astronomy Club. I checked my phone, was already late.

In the blurry edge of my vision, something moved in the shadows under the trees. I glanced up. This whole ordeal had made me unnerved, even paranoid. But it was only another student standing there in the darkness of the decorative evergreens. His hair was one big knot, like someone had placed a birds nest on top of his head. He was probably an art major. They can get away with that kind of weirdness. He stared at me.

I waved, praying to God-something-whatever that he would take the hint and fuck off. He didn’t. Instead, his lips cracked open into a jagged grin that seemed to break his face in half.

I ran.

#elsewhere university #spilled ink #short story #charminglyantiquated #fairies

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ecfandom · 8 years ago

Note

for the prompt: clarke and lexa meet for the first time in the middle of a storm. they are drenched, trying to find shelter and run into each other.

Not exactly what you asked for, but here you go!

The sky had been begging for it all day. Dark, thick cloudshung low over everything, casting shadows and cooling the air enough to bringout jackets and hats and even some gloves.

The only downfall of a Mid West fall was the endless days ofcold, heavy rain that pulled the colorful leaves from the trees and poundedthem into the ground until there was no grass left to be seen.

Lexa loved the Fall and the vivacity of life that the crispair and incessant rains brought, but today she had been running late—a raritythat already had her annoyed and mad at everything. Which meant that she had noumbrella. Even worse, she’d left her hair down with no back-up hairband on herwrist, opting for the extra two minutes it gave her otherwise wasted on braids.

The best part of it all was that today would be the day herbike chain had decided it’d had enough of her cross-city treks to her favoritecoffee shop and book store. Today would be the day it decided to slide rightoff the gears the second Lexa’s foot hit the pedal.

Her best option, her onlyoption, was to pull the collar of her jacket tighter around her neck andtrudge onward towards the bus stop. Besides, the walk gave her time to come upwith excuses for why she’d be ten minutes late to class. The reminder makes hergroan and quicken her step.

She can barelysee the back of the bus driving away from her thanks to the fat drops of waterbombarding her face and eyes, but she can see well enough to be thoroughlypissed off and in despair.

Filled withwater, her boots make a taunting squishing sound as she resigns herself towalking the rest of the way, zig zagging and jogging to stay under awnings overhangs. She checks her phone.

7:55pm.

Five minutesbefore her night class started with at least another fifteen-minute walk. Shestows her phone away, grabs onto her backpack straps and breaks into a soggyrun.

Lexa doesn’tscare. She’s calm cool and collected.

To be fair, thethunder claps is really, really loud.

So when ithappens, she yelps and flinches, momentarily blind by the flash of lighteningthat is much too close for comfort, and nearly dives into the sheltered busstop.

There’s anotherperson there, a small chuckle lets her know, but she’s too distracted trying tokeep her wet hair from dripping down her back to pay the person any attention.

Except then theperson extends a towel.

Except, when shelooks up, she’s staring at Clarke Griffin. Sopping wet and gorgeous as ever.

Which is fine. Because Lexa is calm, cool and collected.

Except Lexa hashad a crush on Clarke Griffin since she sat behind her in Intro to RussianLiterature sophomore year.

“Clarke, hey.”

“Oh, hi.Um…Lexa, right?”

Amazed thatClarke would remember her name a year later, all Lexa can do is nods, smile andthen avert her eyes, unsure of what comes next.

“Did you wantthe towel?”

“Oh.” Lexa takesit, wipes her hands on it and gives it back.

“It’s clean. Youcan wipe your face,” Clarke chuckles.

“Oh, I didn’twant to assume—“ The words die in her throat when Clarke smiles at her again.

“No, it’s fine.Go ahead.”

“You sure?”

With the nod,Lexa buries her face in the plush towel and nearly loses it. The damn thingsmells like Clarke. Fresh and clean and soft. If soft had a smell. She triesnot to groan and takes a little more care than necessary wiping off her face,drawing it out as long as she can. Both, because it’s nice, and because whenshe looks up again, she’ll have no idea what to say.

“I can’t believehow hard it’s coming down.”

Lexa forcesherself out of the towel and nods weakly, handing the towel back.

“You’redrenched, keep it.”

“So are you.”

“Yeah, but youlook significantly colder than I do. Here.” Clarke takes the towel and wraps itaround Lexa’s shoulders with another one of those smiles that makes Lexa’sstomach flip.

“Can I ask why you had a towel with you?”

“I was headed to the gym to swim and then lost the motivation when it started pissing out. She looks around wide-eyed as the rain pounds down around them, the two of them the sole wanders crazy enough to be outside. “This isinsane.”

Lexa hums,glaring at the discoloration of her boots thanks to the god awful waterswirling around the sidewalk.

“So what’ve youbeen up to since Russian Lit?”

“Me?”

Clarke chuckles,looks around. “No, I was asking the guy behind you.”

Lexa glancesbehind herself and blushes before turning back around to a grinning Clarke.“You were joking…”

Clarke smiles so wide Lexa’s knees go numbsand her throat goes dry at the pure radiance of it on Clarke’s face. “Yeah, I was joking joking. So how’ve you been? Still embarrassing lit majors by knowing morethan them?”

Lexa tints pinkagain and shakes her head with a quiet, single huff of laughter. “No, justmyself.”

“I don’t believethat. Someone as smart as you…couldn’t possibly embarrass easily.”

“I’m embarrassednow.”

“Really? Why?”

“I’m not goodat…talking to pretty girls.” Lexa’sheart pounds in her chest as the confession hangs between them like thecondensation puffing out of her mouth. Somehow, somewhere, she’d gotten theconfidence to admit that to Clarke, but now, per usual, it’s no where to befound and she thinks she might be close to passing out.

Clarke takes astep closer to her and reaches out to play with the corner of the towel hangingnear Lexa’s hip. “I don’t know, that was pretty good, I think,” she saysquietly.

Lexa can barelyhear it over the sound of her heart beat pounding away as if it’s trying tocompete with the rain to be the loudest.

“Were youheading somewhere before?”

Lexa manages tolook up at her, momentarily left behind by Clarke’s last statement. Clarkesmiles at her and it makes it even harder to come up with words. She wishes shecould tell her to stop. “Um. I had class.”

“Are you stillplanning on going?”

Lexa pulls outher phone.

8:07pm.

“Probably not.”Her stomach flips both nervously and excitedly. She’d never skipped a classbefore. Without Clarke standing there, looking at her with those freakign eyes, she’d probably bemortified at the sheer idea of it.

“Grounder’s isclose. If you maybe want to go grab something hot?”

Lexa grimacesdown at herself. “I don’t know. I’m soaked…”

“Right, totally.”

“But maybe…youcould come by my place if you want. If it’s closer than yours or wherever youwere going.”

Clarkeconsiders, and Lexa really likes the look of it on her. “Are you close?”

“A couple blockssouth, one east. Near the Dempster stop.”

“Why didn’t youjust take the train in?”

Lexa smilessheepishly. “No money on my Ventra card.”

Clarke laughs,shaking her head. “I feel that. You don’t mind if I come over?”

“Not at all,”she says a little too quickly. “I don’t have any plans.”

“Just to skipclass.”

“Don’t remindme.”

“First time?”

Lexa nods,looking apologetic as if Clarke is her professor and will be offended by herabsence.

“Could’ve calledthat one from a mile away.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. You’re anerd.”

Lexa ducks her headagain.

“Come on.”Clarke grabs her hand and pulls her towards the curb. “I like nerds.”

“Wow…you’re likereally clean.”

Lexa scratchesat her neck as she shuts the door behind them and locks it. “Yeah I mean. Itry. I go a little nuts if I don’t. Living room’s to the left.”

“Do you maybehave a towel? I don’t wanna drip on your floors.”

“Oh sure.” Lexafeels funny being asked for a towel given that she’s wearing Clarke’s, but thenagain, it gives her a moment away from the stunning girl to collect herself.

Lexa sticks herhead inside the hallway closet and counts to five. ‘Oh my god,’ she mouthes,clenching her eyes shut and bouncing on her toes. “You can do this. You can dothis. She’s just a girl.”

“Hey Lexa?”

Lexa pulls herhead out of the closet and calls back to her. “Yeah?”

“Mind if I graba glass of water?”

“Oh sure.Glasses are in the cupboard to the right of the fridge. You’re welcome to anyfood too.”

There’s a pauseand then a chuckle. “Yeah, I think I’m gonna pass on the fridge full ofvegetable.”

Lexa finds herin the kitchen, hands wrapped around a steaming mug.

“I used yourmicrowave. Hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all.I’ve got tea…”

Clarke looksdown into the cup and Lexa’s scans it, hoping it’s not one of her moreembarrassing mugs like the Barbie themed one from her niece. It’s not, thankgod.

“Have any herbaltea?”

Lexa smiles. Teais her forte. She can do tea. “That’s the only kind I have.”

“Of course itis.”

Lexa grabs alarge wooden box off the top of the fridge and sets it down on the counter,opening it to reveal packets upon packets of tea all sorted out into their owncompartments. “Take your pick.”

“Oh wow. Um…Idon’t know, what your favorite?”

Lexa looks overthe contents, playing each flavor in her head, and wondering what impressionit’d leave on Clarke. What it’d say about Lexa. She reaches for one, then drawsback, unsure. She glances over at Clarke, but the way she’s looking at hermakes her squirm, so she focuses back on the tea bags. “What do you like?”

“Oh anything,”Clarke says noncommittally.

Lexa grabs apacket and hands it to her, sighing as if she’s just given her final answer onWho Wants to Be a Millionaire. “Lavender infused Jasmine.”

Clarke smiles.“Sounds amazing.”

“Want any honey?Or stevia…I like stevia in mine.”

“Stevia?”

“It’s an herbalsweetner.”

Clarke gives herthat smile again. “Of course it is.”

Lexa tinglesdelightedly, again finding her shoes quite fascinating.

“I’m good on the sweetner. But maybe some mile?”

“Oh sure. It’sin the fridge, help yourself. I think I’m gonna go put some dry clothes on.Would you like any? We’re about the same size.”

“You’re just agreat deal more fit.”

God what Lexawouldn’t give to disappear into her bed and squeal into her pillow like amoron. Instead she chuckles and shakes her head because it’s polite and she’s agentleman. Gentlewoman. “No, you’re…you look great.”

“That’s sweet.”

“It’s true.” Enough. Lexa scolds herself mentally andshuffles backwards out of the room before Clarke can say anything more. Butthen she remembers…she pokes her head around the living room wall back into thekitchen. “Sorry, did you want some dry clothes?”

Clarke looks atherself, then to Lexa. “That’d be great.”

“Cool. I’ve gota heater in the living room next to the couch if you want. I’ll be right back.”

Clarke in Lexa’sclothes had been a mistake. Clarke in Lexa’s practice shorts an even biggermistake.

“I don’t think Iknew you were on the soccer team,” Clarke says looking at the number on theshorts. Lexa’s looks at it too feeling weird and possessive and into it.

“I try not toadvertise it. Too many associations.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, like, youknow. Stereotypical jock who is dumb and doesn’t care about school.Communications major who takes the minimum credits in easy A classes and isusually a total douche bag.”

“I prefer douchecanoe.”

Lexa grins.“Yeah, well.”

“Well you’recertainly not any of those I’ll give you that.”

Unsure of whatthat means, but hoping it’s a compliment, she smiles to herself and continuesto flip through the channels on her TV, hoping for something good anddistracting.

“I can’t believeit’s still coming down,” Clarke murmurs, shifting on the couch to look out thewindow behind them. It makes her shirt ride up to reveal a soft, round hip. Forthe first time in her life, Lexa has the overwhelming urge to suck on it.

Not a hickeyperson, never a hickey person, thethought startles her into looking away, praying that Clarke hadn’t noticed herstaring. How could she have, though? She had been busy looking out the window.It was only Lexa who had taken the opportunity to look elsewhere.

“Weather channelsays it’ll go through the night and into tomorrow,” she says, clearing herthroat and attempting to clear her mind.

“Oh. Bummer,”Clarke says, though somehow there’s something not quite convincing about it.

In the two hoursthat have passed since finding their way to the couch, Lexa has learned twothings about Clarke.

1. Shehas no sense of personal space.

2. Sheis touchy.

With Clarke’shead relaxed and heavy on her shoulder, Lexa’s not sure when she’d breathedlast, but given the heat flushing through her body, her racing heartbeat andthe dizziness in her head, it was safe to assume it’d been a while.

Her back achesfrom being held still and rigid, anything to keep Clarke from moving, and shecan’t feel her thigh where Clarke’s is draped over it. But it’s fine. It’s allfine. As long as Clarke doesn’t move, she could handle it.

“You smellnice,” Clarke suddenly says, shifting closer to Lexa’s neck and nuzzling everso slightly.

Oh god.

Lexa gulps. “Thanks.”It comes out like a squeaky question because her heart is in her throat and herair is anywhere but her lungs.

“Can I tell youa secret?” Lexa can feel the question on her neck, tickling her skin. Shewonders if Clarke can see how red she is. She nods.

“I think you’reso cute,” Clarke whispers. “Always have.”

Lexa twitchesinvoluntarily has her heart gets even faster. “You do?”

Clarke nods andnuzzles closer. “Mhm. I’ve thought about you a lot since Russian Lit.”

“You have?”

Clarke chucklesand pulls back to look at her. Lexa is relieved to see a matching blush and shyeyes. “Yeah…what do you think about that?”

“I think—I thinkthat’s great. That’s—are you sure?”

“Does this feelmore sure?” Clarke asks, breathy and mostly a gasp.

Lexa is too busykissing a trail up Clarke’s neck to answer. Instead, she pushes her hips into Clarke’sand nips at her jaw, grinning and bolstering at the moan that she elicits.

“Holy shit,Lex—“ Lexa watches in awe as Clarke reacts to Lexa pushing a finger inside her,then another when she finds her lose and slick.

She collapsesdown on top of her, moving off to the side slightly to avoid crushing her. Butshe wants to be close. Wants to make sure this actually happening. That Clarkeis actually kissing her in between making little whimpers. That Clarke iswhispering her name every time she pushes in a certain way.

“You’re good atthis,” Clarke whispers. “Lots of practice?”

She can tell Clarke tries to pass if off as a joke, but she hears the worry inher voice. It’s the same worry she’d had when Clarke had been so comfortablewith this—as if she’d had lots of experience.

Lexa can’t tellher the truth because that’d be embarrassing. Telling Clarke that she’d donelots of reading to make sure she was still good at it after not having beenwith anyone for a while wasn’t exactly a turn on. But she could at leastreassure her. “No.” She kisses her gently. “Just a natural.”

Clarke chuckleswith her eyes closed and her lips parted in pleasure, her tongue coming outlick at her dry bottom lip. The sight spurs something low in Lexa’sstomach—something an awful lot like the familiar tingle of a budding orgasm.She grinds herself down on Clarke’s thigh and moans at the sharp, delicioustwinge of pleasure that confirms her suspicions.

She’s close.Judging by the scrunching of Clarke’s face and the rapidity of her breath, sois she.

“Can I ask yousomething?” Clarke twirls patterns into her sweaty chest with her finger,something so simple, but so beautiful to Lexa. Clarke is soft and sweet,nothing like she expected given the snarky comments and vivacious attitude she’dshown in their class. She’s touchy, yes, but Lexa had come to realize that’sjust how Clarke communicated her feelings. While Lexa was eloquent with herwords, Clarke could do the most amazing things with her gestures.

Like give Lexaheart palpitations with the simple brushing of her finger tips. She kissesClarke’s head and pulls her farther onto her chest, loving that she could holdher like this. “Sure.”

“What is this?Like is this a one time kind of deal or…”

Lexa waits forthe rest of the ‘or’ but it never comes. “I mean…do you want it to be?”

“What? A onetime thing?”

Lexa nods.

Clarke’s fingersstill and immediately Lexa misses it. “Not really…”

Lexa smiles withrelief and squeezes around Clarke, nearly squealing. “Good, me neither.”

Clarke chucklesand her fingers start up again. “So do you wanna maybe go on a date then? Likewhen it stops raining?”

“Can we keepdoing this until then?”

Clarke pushes upto grin down at her. “Oh definitely.”

#clexa #clexa au #clexa fanfic #clexa fanfiction #clexa ficlet

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