#i went radio silent with him last night bc i was trying to gather my thoughts
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gojoest · 1 year ago
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so i turned mr waiter down and he reacted with 👍 to my message
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comfyswitcherblanketfort · 3 years ago
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IUI - The Way I Love You
bear with me here folks
I know the Idiots are usually soft af. but my lovely spouse/fiance/soon-to-be-fiance and beta @dani-dandelino hit me with an idea and I added a dash handful of angst bc i couldn’t help it
Warnings: feelings of inadequacy, fear of breakup (no actual breakup I promise), miscommunication, drunk af Geralt, past shitty relationships, happy ending tho I promise, there’s tears but they’re happy I swear.
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Geralt only ever got sloppy drunk when Jaskier was the DD. It wasn’t necessarily that he didn’t trust anyone else, it was that he didn’t trust his drunk boyfriend not to goad him into something stupid. 
The last time they’d both gotten fucked up outside of their apartment they woke up with three traffic cones and a “Speed Hump” sign in their living room. When they asked Triss what happened she sent them a video of them giggling as they tried to fit the sign into her trunk.
After hanging the sign in their apartment, they decided it may be best to take turns. 
This particular instance, they’d dropped Triss and Yen off and were on their way home, Geralt’s head lolling against the window as he fought to stay awake. 
“I’m not carrying your perky ass upstairs,” Jaskier laughed, snapping his fingers near Geralt’s ear. 
Geralt grumbled but sat up straight and leaned into Jaskier’s outstretched hand, “Radio.”
Affectionately rolling his eyes, Jaskier pulled his hand away and flipped on the radio. Geralt immediately gasped and started singing along off key and slurred. The first time Jaskier heard Geralt scream along to Taylor Swift he’d been shocked, if extremely endeared. 
“BUT I MISS SCREAMIN’ AND FIGHTIN AND KISSIN IN THE RAIN! IT’S TWO AM AND I’M CURSIN’ YOUR NAME! SO IN LOVE THAT WE ACTED INSANE, AND THAT’S THE WAY I LOVED YOUUUUUUUUU!”
Jaskier turned the volume down to a reasonable level when Geralt cranked it so loud his ears might start ringing. He rolled his eyes when Geralt started singing it to him, taking the shortcut home and trying to ignore the little pit forming in his stomach. 
When the song ended Geralt turned the radio down and picked up his hand not gripping the steering wheel, “Jask?”
“Mhm?”
Even in the car, Geralt glanced around conspiratorially before whispering, “I have a secret.”
Fear flared in Jaskier’s chest but he took a deep, calming breath, reminding himself who he was talking to. His boyfriend thought secrets were fun. Mostly because Geralt’s version of a secret was keeping what he made for dinner a surprise until Jaskier got home. He’d even felt guilty not telling Jaskier he was seeing a therapist when they’d started dating. For all his gruff exterior and suspicion, Geralt really was an open book with those he loved and trusted. Jaskier had a very different idea of what secrets in a relationship meant. 
“What’s that, love?” 
Geralt giggled as he traced the edges of a magnolia on the back of Jaskier’s wrist, “That is the way I love you.”
Luckily for Jaskier’s car, they were rolling up to a stop sign. He had time to loose his breath for a moment and fight back the initial feeling of shame and anger with himself before he pulled his hand away and gripped the steering wheel as he punched the gas. 
Through gritted teeth, he said the gentlest thing he could think of, “We don’t kiss in the rain.”
Geralt frowned, almost pouted at him, “I still love you.”
A part of Jaskier wanted to scream at Geralt, another part wanted to pull over and make him walk home, thankfully the loudest part reminded him the idiot was just drunk. He didn’t know what he was saying and he thought he was being sweet. There was also a good possibility he would cry himself to sleep in the passenger seat if Jaskier yelled at him and last time he tried to carry Geralt to bed his back hurt for a week. 
“I love you too,” Jaskier sighed as he pulled into their parking spot. 
He didn’t sleep well that night. Not because his sweaty, smelly, and fidgety boyfriend clung to him in his sleep, but because he couldn’t stop thinking about the ride home. 
Jaskier had lived in relationships like that for most of his adult life. Hell, even in his teens. They were nothing but all consuming passion with no connection to support it and left both parties jaded and lost. When he left his mentor he’d sat in Yen’s chair for hours and hours, until his arm had gone numb, and the only thing he could think was ‘never again’. 
And now Geralt thought he was being cute. The ridiculously meticulous and serious man was only ever sappy when he got drunk and now instead of reveling in it like he’d like, Jaskier was staring at the clock on his nightstand calculating how exhausted he’d be in the morning as the minutes ticked by. 
Turns out, he was at least in the land of the living by the time Geralt shuffled into the kitchen with his hands in his hair and a pained expression. 
“Feel like shit.”
Jaskier hummed in agreement as he sipped his morning tea and shifted in his seat to see better out the window. 
After popping a few anti-inflammatories and nibbling on a cracker before giving up on food, Geralt lumbered up behind Jaskier and draped his arms over his shoulders, “What’s wrong?”
“S’nothing. I’m just being… touchy.”
Geralt pressed a light kiss over the hellebore tattoo on Jaskier’s neck, “I doubt it.”
Tears threatened to spill from his eyes as Jaskier laid his hand over Geralt’s arm across his chest, “I don’t want to lose this.”
“Why…? What makes you think you would?” Geralt was a little slower on the draw hungover, but he knelt next to Jaskier’s chair and rested a hand on his knee as he waited for a response. He only ever looked so worried when Roach had an abscess and it broke Jaskier’s heart. He didn’t want to say it and ruin everything. 
After a deep breath in, he mumbled out his answer, “Do you really love me like that song?”
“What song?” Geralt breathed, his thumb brushing back and forth over Jaskier’s knee.
“The uh, Way I Loved You one.”
Geralt searched his face for a beat, the crease between his eyebrows only deepening, “Of course I do.”
“Fuck,” Jaskier breathed, biting his lip to keep it from wobbling as he forced all the air from his lungs in the hopes it would do something to stop the tears from falling. When it was clear he would lose the battle he leaned forward with his elbows on the table, hiding his face in his hands.
“You… don’t want me to?” Geralt sounded close to tears himself, but he didn’t take his hand off Jaskier’s thigh. 
“No- yes! No?” Jaskier sniffed and wiped at his face but didn’t lean back to look at Geralt, “I- Geralt I can’t just fill a hollow relationship with lust. We ha- I thought we had more? But if you want the- the fights and the hate fucking- I don’t- Geralt I don’t want that. Not with anyone but not with you. Ne-”
“Hey, hey,” Geralt tugged at Jaskier’s arm, gathering him to his chest when the brunette melted into sobs, “I don’t want that. That’s not what I meant. I’m sorry, love. I’m so sorry I let you think that.” He cradled Jaskier’s head to his shoulder, pressing kisses into his hair between softly spoken apologies and reassurances. They stayed there until Jaskier’s tea went cold and his sobs were closer to little gasps. 
Eventually, Jaskier lifted his head and met Geralt’s eyes, “H-how do you love me?”
Geralt licked his lips, his voice barely above a whisper, “Not- It’s not hollow.”
Jaskier squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his forehead to Geralt’s, “Please?”
One of Geralt’s hands came up to cup Jaskier’s cheek as he took a deep breath, “I’ve never loved anyone like I love you… I never wanted to be romantic with anyone until you. You… You make me feel… safe. I’m never bored of you or numb or sick of you. This is the first relationship I’ve had where I bother to fight, Jask. I love you so much it makes me do things I never thought to do and I’m glad and I never want to change anything about us. Never.” 
A shiver ran down Jaskier’s spine as relief flooded his whole body. His throat ached from crying and his shoulders were sore from holding all that tension in a way they hadn’t for years, but he’d never felt so good. Geralt loved him. Him. Not some tumultuous relationship or the sex or the drama of it all. Someone finally loved him for him. 
It hadn’t really hit Jaskier till then. They’d said ‘I love you’, sure, but he hadn’t really believed Geralt, just like he’d stopped believing the string of selfish lovers before him. 
“Thank Mellitelle,” Jaskier laughed, just on this side of hysterical as he tightened his grip around Geralt’s shoulders, “I fucking love how boring we are. And you. Fuck I really really do love you.”
“Even when I smell like my regulars?” Geralt teased, intentionally huffing a little extra and dosing Jaskier in his horrendous hangover morning breath.
Jaskier wrinkled his nose but smiled and kissed him anyway, “Of course.”
“Mhh,” Geralt pulled away for a moment, brushing his thumb over Jaskier’s crows feet in a silent request for him to open his eyes, “Can we go back to bed?”
“The crying does it for you, huh?” Jaskier chuckled, his voice was still weak but his laugh was genuine.
“I’m so dizzy, Jask,” squeezing his eyes shut and shaking his head ever so slightly, Geralt plopped back onto his heels. If Jaskier hadn’t witnessed just how much he drank he’d say he was lying, but Jaskier was truly surprised he’d even climbed out of bed this morning.
“Mkay, up. Back to bed then.”
They settled under the blankets and tangled themselves back together. Geralt hummed, closing his eyes and squeezing Jaskier a little tighter.
New, happier tears threatened at the corners of his eyes but he pushed them down, opting to trace the corner of Geralt’s buttercup tattoo peeking out of his shirt, “I love you.”
Geralt took a deep breath in before he sighed out a rumbling, “I know.”
“No, Geralt. Really,” Jaskier laid his hand over the yellow and green ink, “I’ve said these words more times than I can count but I don’t think I ever really understood them until you.”
“Jaski-”
“I love you,” Jaskier’s interruption was far smaller and far more fragile than he had intended. His words just continued to spill out, “You’re steady and calm and I’ve never had that. I don’t know what it’s supposed to be like and I’m constantly scared I’m gonna fuck it up…”
Comforting fingers ran through his hair as Geralt murmured his reply, “Me too,” Jaskier just squeezed his shoulder in a bit of solidarity and a bit of selfish comfort, “But I think we’re doing alright…”
“Why’s that?”
“Well,” Geralt started, shifting so he was practically engulfing Jaskier, “we both still love each other, and...” his boyfriend pinched him when he trailed off, pretending to fall asleep in a way that always mad Jaskier giggle, “Ow- and you use the hooks by the front door.” 
“I do, don’t I?” Jaskier sniffled, “And you used your words.”
“I’d use all the words for you.”
“All of them?”
Geralt really was drifting away this time, his words coming slowly as his arms relaxed and Jaskier felt their full weight over him, “Not well, but I would...” 
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mythiccheroacademia · 4 years ago
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—single!parent headcanons
part one
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mtha thots: the manga makes me really sad and i think children deserve a childhood so i made this to cope
all characters are 18+
Warnings: it’s long but, other than that, none <3
© 2021 all writing content belongs to mythiccheroacademia. do not repost or modify
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Shouto Todoroki: 
truth be told, shouto never wanted children 
he knew how important someone’s childhood meant
shouto honestly couldn’t trust himself not to mess it up :(
so imagine his surprise when he came to fall in love with this little boy, no older than six, he found snooping around a dumpster 
it’s actually kind of funny how they came to be bc shouto was 100% put off by the kid
when they made eye contact, they stared at each other like 
shouto:🧍🏻
the boy: 👁👄👁
shouto again:🧍🏻
before the brat blew him a raspberry and tried to run off 
ofc he caught up to him and, despite the boy’s tantrum, the two went straight to the police
and for some reason, todoroki ended up with him in his condo
the first couple of weeks were terrible 
it seemed like Yuuma hated his guts 
shouto let him have his space and only really pestered him when it was time to do the essentials
at midoriya’s suggestion, he’d try and talk to him about his day or how his therapy sessions went, but it was no use 
the boy would tell him not to worry about it and scurry off 
this happened for some time and honestly, todoroki was at his wit’s end 
until one day, shouto realized that it wasn’t that the child hated him, he just didn’t want to be a burden him
then everything clicked 
mustering up the courage, todoroki one day asked Yuu if he’d like to help him make dinner and the way the kid’s eyes brightened up at the chance to be useful made him a bit sad
but he pushed it away in favor for how the boy blossomed as he showed shouto the right way to stir meat stew and make onion rings
at the end, the red n white hero gave him an honest smile and thanked him for his help
Yuuma looked at him for a long time before bursting into tears 
it was the first time shouto had seen him cry in weeks 
it was also the first time they hugged
from then on, it was almost magical how well they clicked 
the boy was exitable and extroverted, todoroki was quiet and reserved 
they were both stubborn to a fault sometimes and that didn’t bode over well during the few disagreements they had but they brought the best out in each other 
shouto made the kid feel safe and secure, always reminding him that anything he did for him was never burdensome 
Yuuma gave the hero a confidence boost and a chance at another type of love he never knew he wanted 
the first time his son called him dad was when todoroki made the adoption official 
Yuuma shyly asked if it was okay that he called him his father and shouto will not admit to the tears he desperately tried to hide from a teasing midoriya and his siblings (ofc he had them there)
no one knows this but todoroki literally had separation anxiety the first couple of years
his child was just fine being with the babysitter but shouto would spend his work days/nights feeling very tense being away from him 
called/texted the kid all the time, left him encouraging sticky notes in his lunch box, and would hug him for at least 3 min before leaving the house
he’s such a mother hen bye
he’s lucky yuu adores him bc he was lowkey doing a lot LMAO
they have movie nights together and geek over manga like nerds 
yuuma cosplayed as roy mustang once and todoroki has an album of pics from that day alone 
todoroki’s the type to randomly bring his son fruit just because 
yuuma regularly slept in shouto’s bed/futon until around 7th grade
as his son got older, and more popular (w the ladies AND gents hehe) at school, todoroki got a little jealous bc yuuma wanted to spend more time with his friends
he was legit hurt the first time yuu canceled on movie night to go to a sleepover 🥺
todoroki moped over it until midoriya told him to knock it off 💀
it’s a shameful quality of his, but shouto will always lie to get his kid out of the stupid shit he gets himself into only bc yuu plays really funny pranks 
has to keep himself from laughing in front of the principle 
they’re both lowkey mischevious asf 
he’ll scold him later tho so it’s okay, he’s responsible™️
shouto always calls yuu “son”
if he calls him by his full name, he’s either sad or annoyed w him
during family gatherings, yuuma is the star of the show bc of his superb cooking skills
he and fuyumi get along great
and surprisingly enough, bakugo adores the kid even though the same can’t be said for todoroki himself 
yuuma wants to open a restaurant and he’s a little afraid of his father’s reaction
little does he know, shouto is ready to hand over his black card at moment’s notice purrr✨
he’s a really supportive father and he has his hiccups, but todo tries his very best and his son makes him impossibly proud every day 
oh and did i mention they wear matching sweaters?
they’re that kind of family
it’s so cute i could die 
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Midoriya Izuku: 
midoriya was born and bred to be a father 
change my mind 
i mean look at that face 
that’s daddy material to me 😌
anyways
midoriya has two girls that are about a year apart
due to the immense pressure of being with the #1 hero and an unwillingness to be a mother, his then girlfriend at the time suddenly left him, signing over all maternal rights to the hero 
it just crushed izuku 
he spent weeks trying to look for her and to make it work 
he wanted his girls to have a two-parent household, but she went radio silent 
it was a difficult adjustment 
but deku is the most ambitious and resiliant person on the planet so he was devoted to giving them the best lif he could 
and ofc he had the support of all his friends and his mother 
but there were a lot of ups and downs
mostly downs in the first year being a single parent
at the time, his youngest wasn’t even one whiles eldest was almost two 
and izuku worked a lot 
being #1 meant he was the country’s go-to whenever something happened and he missed a lot of stuff he’d never get to redo 
like his youngest, Maia’s, first word which was “bunny”
and the first time his oldest, Naomi, went to the bathroom by herself 
and izuku will never forget the day he came to pick his kids up after being on a week long international mission
when he reached out for them, they looked at him as if they didn’t know who he was 
izuku spent the entire night crying in inko’s arms 
the next morning, he only had to deliver some paperwork, but everyone noticed the usually chipper hero’s sour mood and stayed clear from his path
even bakugo and todoroki felt chills when izuku passed by 
it was tough, but deku was determined 
he started taking up night shifts so he could be there for his girls during the day
he’d pick them up from inko’s right after work and spend the day playing with them 
izuku stayed up on a dangerous amount of caffeine and will power
there were days he literally passed out from exhaustion, but it was worth it to see them through their milestones 
when Naomi went to kindergarten, he couldn’t stop buzzing around w excitement
he just adored listening her ramble on about what she learned and that persisted on even as she grew
like, she’s a genius
she was his doppleganger in intellect and resilience
she’s def a daddy’s girl and although she’s not as empathetic as her father, they’re very close 
naomi is an excellent older sister and stepped up early when izuku couldn’t always be there 
maia is izuku’s match in personality
she’s very sweet, a bit more extroverted, and compassionate
but pls don’t get it twisted, that girl gives the fam a run for their money 
she’s got izuku’s righteousness but heightened 100x and with a lot more anger
the girl’s got quite the mean mug and she got hands highkey
they both do tbh (i mean, izuku is their dad...)
the amount of fights naomi’s had to back her up in is ridiculous 😭
they’re two peas in a pod tho so if you mess w one sister, you mess w both ‼️
regardless of all that, izuku wouldn’t change them for anything 
he’s the type to obnoxiously kiss them on their cheeks before school
they’ll take turns doing each other’s hair
izuku gets pigtails that he proudly wears to work 
deku has a private instagram that is so filled with those two, sometimes ppl forget it’s his
he def has a “girl dad” t-shirt
he calls them his angels 🥺
i see him getting a tattoo of their names on his arm or something
they’re all cry babies so when they get into arguments, it doesnt last long
both girls went to UA to be heroes and izuku’s heart just soars with pride every day 
he also cried an obnoxious amount and for some odd reason, kept popping up for “demonstrative purposes”
they had to have a family talk so they could tell him to stop babying them in the kindest way possible 
and by that i mean, naomi said it bluntly and maia did damage control lmao
overall, izuku loves those girls more than life and they love him just the same 
raising them was a rollercoaster, but he’d do it all over again in a heartbeat
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Sero Hanta:
another one that just looks like he’d be an amazing father
please have my children sir
sero is one of the few that was actually looking to adopt a kid
he came from a large family and desired connection with a family of his own
he tried a for a while, but it never seemed to happen
until he came about a small girl he met on the off chance of passing by her hospital room when he was getting a quick check up
she was one of the children they saved on a mission and when he saw her curled up on the hospital bed that seemed to swallow her whole, his feet moved on their own
the girl, Keiko, was left injured and an orphan, yet despite her circumstances, she was just a joy to be around 
sero spent the rest of visiting time with her and just knew she was it for him
she was very sick so he’d spend his breaks visiting her at the hospital 
keiko was a huge cellophane fan and it just melted his heart 🥺
she’d have a huge smile on her face, unabashedly showing off her missing front tooth, every time he walked in
they’d spend hours just drawing or talking about their day
when sero shyly brought up the possibility of adopting her, keiko could barely contain herself 
she drew him one of her best pieces as a thank you and sero still has it hanging on his mirror to this day ❤️
keiko’s actually quite the artist so there’s many more up there to keep it company 
the adjustment period went smoother than anticipated
the girl had her moments and hanta was getting used to being a 24/7 parent, but it was like they quickly acted as if they had been blood related their entire lives
they are ride or dies for each other LMAO
they don’t argue
like at all
the worst they ever got was when keiko rushed to help her father on the job when she happened to see him get hurt 
sero yelled at her in panic 
it was so startling that they avoided each other for the time being
but a few hours later, sero went and apologized 
and that was that
keiko had frequent nightmares and sero would sacrfice copious hours of sleep so that he could turn on the projecter and give her a run down about every star in the “sky” before she falls asleep 
he actually bought and named a star after her for her first bday with him
sero pats her head a lot and she hates it
he calls her squirt, sport, kid, and princess if they’re having a soft moment
they have an unholy amount of matching onsies 
the kid was already getting to the stage where she wanted to be independent, but she would let her father pick out her outfits sometimes
only bc he put a lot of effort into doing it 
aka, she caught him crying over cute pintrest pics bc he’s a simp
okay but sero really, isn’t much of a crier, but he’s sentimental asf
every milestone is recorded
every school night, he’s there (she was a good kid, so he all but gloats w pride after every visit w the teachers)
any drawing she makes, he has 
he’ll do anything to be there for his daughter so it really crushed him when he couldn’t go to her high school’s father daughter dance 
sero had a mission he couldnt get out of and he was sorely pissed off about it 
keiko assured her father that it was okay and that it was corny anyways
but he could hear the disappointment in her voice 
he made kirishima go with her anyways bc he didnt want her to miss out on the experience 
and you bet your ass that when she came back home, sero was there in a tux with the living room set up to make it up to her 
it is just as cheesy as you think it is, but they’re cute so who cares 
also the way they both can dance is crazyyyyyy
rhythm isn’t even the word
if there was a competition for best father-daughter dance duo, they would win every time! and i stand by that!
they have at least one viral tiktok dance they did together
sero’s not the emotional type, but the first time keiko had a boyfriend he def made a threat or two to him 
it was actually so scary 
anyways
they’re honestly the cutest duo and everyone on the block agrees
 i love it ❤️
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entropychanges · 4 years ago
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Tell me what you’ll do, please
So, Michael, dripping like a wet mop on the restaurant’s tile floor, stood silently as he looked between the sister of the girl whose murder he covered up only two months ago, and his lover who would rather be sent off to war than be with him. Great. He swallowed, figuring he may as well break the silence.
“Sorry, I wasn’t sure if-”
“The kitchen is closed,” Liz interrupted, looking him up and down before saying, “but you can stay until the storm lets up.”
Or, in which Michael gets caught out in the rain while sleeping in his truck, and ends up taking shelter in the last place he wants to be.
also on ao3
title (from phoebe bridger's demi moore) precedes the lyric "I dont wanna be alone" which is kind of a central theme in Michael's mindset in this fic
warnings for mention of Michael's injury, very brief and vague mention of toolshed incident near the end, lots of talk about rosa's death and liz's mourning, michael has self worth issues, michael and alex say mean things to each other bc they’re sad and scared and just like a lot of angst
(3054 words)
     -----------------------------------------------------------------------------
When Michael woke from his drunken nap, he sobered up immediately at the feeling of his blankets being drenched and the sky being far too dark for his liking.
He knew it was going to rain that night, and had even felt it in the joints of his mangled hand. What he didn’t predict, however, was that he was going to sleep for a few more hours than he intended, waking up in the middle of a storm rather than to the late afternoon desert sun. 
“Shit, shit, shit!” he hissed, scrambling out of his truck bed and attempting to gather his linens. As he piled the soaked pillows and blankets he realized that he’d stupidly kept his bag of clothes beside him as he slept, leaving him with nothing dry to change into. He shoved his belongings into a sopping pile on his passenger seat before rushing to the other side of the truck cab and turning on the ignition with shaking hands. 
Safe from the weather outside, Michael cranked up the heater and stripped off his shirt, huddling against himself for warmth.  He ran his fingers through his curls in an effort to squeeze the water out, but to no avail. He sat like this, shivering and pathetic, for about 20 minutes before deciding that he needed a plan B. He didn’t have enough gas to use his heater for any extended period of time, and he wouldn’t have enough money for a refill until Sanders paid him for his work that week. 
So, he decided to head into town to see if he could find somewhere that would let him stay inside for the duration of the storm without expecting a dime out of him. Normally he would try the library, but that closed at 8 and according to the clock on his radio, it was around 11 pm. Damn it. Hardly anything in this sleepy town was open past 10 on a weeknight other than the bars, and the storm wasn’t helping his chances.
Monsoon season was probably the most detrimental time for his beloved old Chevy that he called home, and tonight was no exception. He could hardly see through his windshield with the mix of dust and rain smattered across it, the high-velocity winds forcing his wipers to barely keep up. He was able to see enough to drive, though, as well as to recognize the signs on the shops and restaurants. They were almost all closed, as he’d suspected, except for one - the Crashdown still had its lights on and as he pulled into a parking space in front of it, he could see two figures inside. Liz Ortecho was wiping the counter as she spoke to the person in front of her, whose back was turned to Michael. 
Only a few months ago, Michael would be too embarrassed to walk into the Crashdown at half-past 11 looking like a drowned rat and ask for a favor from his academic competitor. Now, though, Liz was going through her own living hell, which Michael felt partially responsible for, and had no room in her life to pity some punkass kid that lived in his truck. So, he swallowed his guilt and pride and shame and made his way out of his car and into the pouring rain. Without giving himself a chance to rethink this decision, he threw open the diner’s door, bringing attention to himself far too dramatically. 
And, well, shit. Maybe he would’ve been better off using his fake id to spend his night with the racist alcoholics at the Wild Pony.
The first thing he noticed was that Liz looked rough. She clearly hadn’t been sleeping, as her eye bags were dark and evident, and her skin was paler than usual. She stood stock still at his cinematic entrance, her face full of annoyance and exhaustion. She no longer looked like the nerdy girl-next-door that Max had a crush on. She looked older than her age, and, in a sense, she was. She was going through more sadness than most had in their entire lifetimes, and that thought sent a spike of pain in Michael’s chest.
 It reminded him of that selfish anger he’d been repressing since that night; anger at Isobel for killing the girls, anger at himself and Max for covering it up, anger at whatever entities left the three of them on this planet in the first place. He usually tried to shove those thoughts down before they ate away at him, but that was impossible when the consequence of their actions was quite literally staring himself in the face.
He glanced at the figure sitting on the stool across from Liz and his stomach dropped. Of course, it just had to be the very person Michael had been avoiding for the past two weeks.
He watched as Alex’s face morphed from confusion, to brief concern, and finally an annoyance that rivaled Liz’s. The last thing Michael wanted was to relive the fight they’d had after Alex told him he was enlisting in the air force. 
Alex called Michael a violent alcoholic that was wasting his life. 
Michael compared him to every birth and foster parent who had abandoned him.
Alex said Michael was no better than his abusive father.
Michael said that was funny seeing as he was following in his daddy’s footsteps.
It wasn’t pleasant.
So, Michael, dripping like a wet mop on the restaurant’s tile floor, stood silently as he looked between the sister of the girl whose murder he covered up only two months ago, and his lover who would rather be sent off to war than be with him. Great. He swallowed, figuring he may as well break the silence.
“Sorry, I wasn’t sure if-”
“The kitchen is closed,” Liz interrupted, looking him up and down before saying, “but you can stay until the storm lets up.” 
Michael nodded, flinging water from his hair. He sat in the nearest booth, looking at his hands. He didn’t exactly have a plan for what he’d do if someone were to let him in. Maybe he could sleep? He didn’t think Liz would appreciate having to wake him up to kick him out once the rain stopped, but making conversation didn’t seem like much of an option. 
When he looked back over to see that Liz had bent down to clean below the counter, Alex was still staring at him. Michael glanced back down at his hands, but it was too late. Alex approached the booth and stood over him.
“Hey, Alex.”
“What happened?”
“I fell asleep and when I woke up it was raining and all my shit was wet,” he said, still looking down. 
Alex furrowed his brows. “It started raining around 8.”
“I guess I went to bed early.”
“Is that your way of saying you passed out drunk?”
Michael raised his gaze to glare at Alex. Alex glared right back.
“Can we not do this right now?”
Alex huffed a sigh and sat across from him. Michael leaned back and turned his head, watching the downpour out the window. They sat in silence for a minute until Alex spoke up.
“You need to change your splint.”
For someone that “wouldn’t be Michael’s medicine”, Alex sure liked to act like his doctor. But, he wasn’t wrong. Michael’s splint was soaked, making it functionally useless.
“I have some gauze in the truck, I’ll fix it later,” he replied, still staring at the rain. 
“Just grab it now, I’ll help you do it.”
Michael turned back to Alex. “What? No, I-”
Alex stood up. “Get the gauze and I’ll meet you upstairs.” 
As Alex turned away, presumably to ask Liz if she was cool with him bringing the personified version of a stray dog found in the gutter up into the small apartment she shared with her grieving father, Michael conceded and ran back to his truck to grab the gauze. He could never really say no to Alex. He rushed back in, covering the gauze with his body to prevent any rain damage and, with a quick “bathroom’s on the right” from Liz, he ran up the stairs to meet Alex in the tiny restroom that Liz used to share with Rosa. Used to. Michael shuddered at the thought. He was too sober for this long night. 
Except, Alex wasn’t in the restroom. He was nowhere to be found. Regardless, Michael closed the door gently and began peeling the gauze off his hand, the feeling not dissimilar to applying a strip of wet paper-mâché to a surface. He winced at the pain, which he’d been ignoring until then, and wished he had some acetone to take the edge off. 
He glanced at the medicine cabinet.  Maybe…He opened the cabinet and there it was, half a bottle of kroger brand nail polish. Jackpot. Once he finished his second swig, the door handle started twisting. Shit. He used his telekinesis to put the bottle back in the cabinet and close the door, all while rinsing his mouth to cover the evidence. He didn’t want to think about what Alex’s reaction would be to finding him drinking Liz’s nail polish remover straight out of the bottle. “Seriously, Guerin? Alcohol not enough of a buzz for you anymore?”. Alex always called him “Guerin” when he was disappointed or mad at him. Lately, that seemed to be more often than not. 
Alex peeked his head in slowly, as if to give Michael privacy, which was frankly adorable, seeing as how many times they’d seen each other at least partially nude. When he saw that Michael was decent, he opened the door completely, revealing that he was carrying a pile of clothes and towels. 
“Here, change into these,” Alex commanded, handing him the clothes. His clothes. Michael’s ears turned red against his wishes at the thought of wearing Alex’s clothes. 
“”You always have a stash of clothes at the Ortecho’s, or is this just my lucky night?” he asked, removing his wet t-shirt. Alex turned away, making Michael roll his eyes.
“I would usually come here when things got ugly at my place. Arturo didn’t mind me sleeping on Liz and Rosa’s floor, so I kept some of my stuff here. Tonight I’m here for Liz, though,” Alex explained.
Michael removed his pants.  “You know you don’t have to turn away when I’m changing, right? We’ve seen each other naked, like, a hundred times.” 
Now it was Alex’s turn to blush. “I think a hundred is a little hyperbolic,” he said as he turned around to face Michael. 
Michael ran the towel down his body before finally ruffling his curls dry. “Well there was our first time... “
“Obviously.”
“And the time in the cab of my truck just a few days later…”
“That was just uncomfortable.”
“And then a week later when we had that picnic out in the desert at midnight…”
“Ugh, that was just gross. Do you know how many spiders and scorpions are out there? Definitely wish I’d kept my pants on for that.”
“And then add a few more in the back of my truck and that should add up to one hundred!”
“Still a hyperbole. I’d say that’s 8, total. The rest at least one of us kept our pants or shirts on.”
“Sorry, I forgot to add the ones from my dreams.”
“Oh god, please shut up,” Alex said just a little loudly, making Michael snort and put a finger to his lips. 
“Shh, Alex, c’mon. No need to wake up Arturo by discussing our epic sexcapades.”
Michael was now fully dressed in Alex’s clothes, wearing a burgundy sweater that felt softer than anything he’d ever worn before and black jeans that were just a little too tight. He looked at himself in the mirror and cracked a smile. 
“Maybe I could pull the emo look off, huh? What do you think, darlin?” He added the “darlin” as a test. When Alex was actually pissed, the pet name only ticked him off even more. When Michael was starting to get back on his good side, he brushed it off and pretended he didn’t like it, even though he definitely did. 
Alex suppressed a smile. Score. 
“I think you’re ridiculous. Now lean against the sink and hold this washcloth.”
Michael raised an eyebrow but did as he was told. 
“Here, hold the washcloth like this,” Alex said before gently moving the fingers on Michael’s left hand around the cloth. It hurt like hell, but Michael did his best to hide it. He didn’t like Alex seeing him in pain, especially when he knew Alex blamed himself. Michael didn’t want him to have another reason to feel guilty. 
“It’s good of you to come over here and be with Liz. She seems…” He trailed off, not sure of what he was planning on saying. She seems, what, bad? Exhausted? Depressed? Like she’d just had her favorite person in the world taken from her, and now the entire town was spreading lies about her? He just let Alex finish his thought. 
“It’s just what friends do. She needs support right now,” Alex murmured, wrapping the gauze around Michael’s fingers. “She’s leaving town, too, soon. Which is a good thing, I think.”
Michael stiffened at that. He already knew Liz was leaving, of course. He was just as responsible for that as he was for Rosa’s postmortem defamation. It’s that “too” that hits. Maybe it was the buzz from the acetone or the thrill of Alex watching him undress, but either way Michael was able to forget for a second about the coldness that had been between them just a few minutes ago, and the reason for it being there. That little word, “too”, was a painful reminder that hurt just a little more than the feeling of his disjointed bones being squeezed too tightly by Alex’s makeshift splint. Michael inhaled sharply to indicate this. 
“Shit, sorry, let me make this a little looser.”
Michael looked down and shook his head a tad bit too violently, trying to indicate that he didn’t give a damn about the stupid splint. 
“What? What is it Michael?”
Michael squeezed his eyes shut, knowing he was diving headfirst into the argument he was trying to pretend had never happened. 
“You can’t go.” 
Alex dropped Michael’s hand, which he’d just finished putting the last piece of tape on.
“Goddamn it, Michael, did we really not spend enough time talking about this already? I’m sick of my father looming over me, and, let’s face it. I’m not like you. I can’t just waste my life in this garbage town forever, sustaining myself on whiskey and bar fights.”
Michael opened his eyes back up and realized he had tears welling up. It wasn’t because of what Alex had said, words and insults didn’t phase him anymore. It was that his deepest anxiety was becoming his reality. Michael was going to be left behind, yet again. 
He was used to pushing his fears down, but right now he didn’t want to repress. He wanted Alex to understand exactly how he was feeling, no matter how childish or pathetic he sounded in the process.
“I don’t want you to leave me. I don’t want to be alone.”
He looked up to meet Alex’s eyes. The other boy’s face melted from the defensive hardness he’d held before to something much softer. It wasn’t piteous, it was just… sad. 
“I don’t want to leave you Michael. I definitely don’t want you to be alone. You’re the only reason I’ve ever even considered staying.”
Michael looked down again. His words were sweet, but they held no meaning. It didn’t matter how much Alex cared about him, he was still leaving. 
“You know this doesn’t have to be goodbye forever, right? I’ll be coming back after basic, and then I’ll be coming home on leave whenever I can.” Alex cupped Michael’s face with his hands, forcing him to look up at him. Memories flooded in of their first kiss, when they cradled each other’s faces in the UFO emporium. Michael mirrored the movement and leaned in to Alex’s space, but didn’t close the gap. Instead, he watched Alex closely, reading the earnesty in his eyes. It seemed like he truly believed they could still be together, even through hell.
It was Alex that made the move, pressing Michael into the sink behind him and tenderly kissing his lips. Their movements were slow and gentle, much different from their usual sexual intensity. This was a different kind of intimacy. They touched each other lovingly rather than lustfully, their focus not on rushing to make each other come, but instead on patiently memorizing every detail they could. They were so enraptured with their shared space that the outside world seemed to melt away, including the door that was being pushed open behind them.
“Oh shi-” they heard behind them, shattering the moment. Alex jumped away, terror in his eyes. Michael’s heart was in his throat. Of course, it was just Liz, who didn’t actually care about their romantic involvement, just that they didn’t have sex on her bathroom sink. Still, the last time they were interrupted like this wasn’t a night they wanted to relive. 
“I just wanted to let Guerin know that it stopped raining,” Liz said, her eyes turned to the floor uncomfortably. This was her polite way of saying “please get out of my home it’s past midnight and I’ve been waiting for you to leave for half an hour”, so he took the cue for what it was and headed out the door with a nod.  
“Hey, Michael?” he heard from behind him. He turned back around. 
“I just wanted to let you know that I’m leaving in a week. I’d like to see you before then, to say goodbye.” 
Michael gave another small nod, and headed down the stairs at twice his usual speed, not wanting either of them to hear him cry.
When he got to his truck, he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep anytime soon. So, instead, he devised a plan to ensure he wouldn’t be around whenever Alex decided to schedule that goodbye. 
And this plan required Kyle Valenti’s hubcaps.
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