#i went off on a tangent oopsie

[x1tadpole1x]

help me find the original creator of a gif??

hey ya'll so for like awhile now i've been wondering who originally made the classic pikachu caramelldansen clip (also known as pikadance??)

wayback machine isn't really giving me any luck nor is reverse image searching. at most i can find youtube and nicovideo (2008) uploads of it, but none that say "i'm the original creator" or who the original is

its not that big of a deal, but i've known this gif since i was like 13 at least (i'm 25 now yeesh) and have never known who made it and honestly just really want to know

the full vid (or perhaps two videos by the same artist mashed together??) has also been posted on youtube (2009) with "the pikachu song" which is just butterfly by smile.dk but with varying pikas and pikachus for lyrics

that itself (the pikachu butterfly remix) i'm having trouble finding the source of as well. seems like its source may be in ddr or step mania as that what seems to come up and i can find a chart for it from step mania on youtube (2010) by searching "step mania butterfly pikachu remix", but idk anything about step mania so idk if that's modded or not or if its coming up cus butterfly is a song in those games

anyways there are other clips in the pikachu song as well. ones from the anime and an ashchu/pikachu paffendorf meme (omg paffendorf) which i can not find the source of either (has to be from at least 2008 or so tho since it has shaymin and lucario in it), but i'm talking about the bit that starts at 3:23. seems to be by the same artist as the og gif i'm talking about and perhaps stems from smash bros a bit since one of the pikachus has an alternate costume from it on

[sincerelybubbles]

It's a Date part 2

warnings: fluff, descriptions of being touch starved (? idk) not really edited oopsies

synopsis: things go well after f!reader and spencer's date, spencer helps reader see that she's wanted and deserving of affection

part 1

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚

“Sorry, it’s messy,” you say, wringing your hands as you walk through the door. You hear Spencer laugh out through his nose, a quick burst of air that has you spinning around to watch him latch the door. 

He’s shaking his head, hair falling in front of his eyes, nose bridge crinkled. 

“What?”

“You’re acting like I’ve never been here before.” He twists the deadbolt and walks over to you, shaking his head one more time before slipping off his shoes and heading into the kitchen. 

“I don’t know, I guess it feels different, somehow, now that …” Neither of you has tried to put a label on this. It’s been weeks, coffee dates squished between hectic work schedules, yawning absences while he chases cases with the team, and one movie night at his place that had you listening to him rant about the inaccuracies of a historical drama you picked out. It’s been lovely, you adore his tendencies to go off on tangents, enjoying simply watching him light up and trip over his own words to get everything out. It feels like he’s racing to say whatever he can before you interrupt him. You never have, something he commented on during your second date. 

“You know you can just tell me to shut up when I go off about stupid stuff like that. Everyone does, I’m used to it, I don’t want to bore you.” “Why would I? It’s not boring or stupid — it’s stuff you care about and I like hearing what you care about.”

“Now that, what?” Spencer asks, settling his back against your counter and resting his hands on the edge behind him. 

He’s still in his work clothes, tie loose, gun at his hip, hair behind his ears. 

One thing you didn’t expect from him? Confidence. You knew he had to be confident in some ways — he’s never doubted his intellectual ability that you could tell — but it only took a short time for him to gain his comfort around you. No longer did he blush and bumble his way through sentences, struggling to meet your eye. Your first kiss actually seemed to clear that up quickly. 

It happened feet away from where you’re standing, outside of your door, after dinner. He reached forward to brush an eyelash on your cheek as you said goodbye, you leaned into his hand and, after a moment and with a burst of adrenaline that fueled your forwardness, you leaned up and toward him, a hand on his arm, and brought your lips to his.  He was hesitant, fingertips brushing your cheekbone, but he came to life as you pulled away to ask him if this was alright, palm meeting your cheek fully and bringing you in for a proper kiss.  Excitement was evident by the way he pressed closer to you, stepping nearer and putting another hand on your waist, locking you in place. Under the excitement was a tenderness you’ve never felt before. He kissed like he wanted to take all the air from your lungs but he held you with the sort of care that made your lungs ache for a reason entirely seperate from the kissing. 

“I don’t know,” you say, chickening out from asking for the hundredth time, going to meet him in the kitchen. 

“Hey,” Spencer says, catching you by the waist and pulling you to come stand near him with one hand on your hip. “Ask,” he says, tucking his chin to grin down at you, nudging your foot with his.

“Why don’t you?”

“I’m afraid to scare you off,” he says with a smile. Behind his eyes, though, you can see the truth in it. 

He called you the morning after your date. Young sunlight caught in your eyes and caused you to squint as you searched for your forgotten phone, spots dancing and dust creating a kaleidoscope as you pressed answer.  “Hello?” you asked, confused. It was Spencer, wishing you a good morning. He went quiet when you asked why he called, if everything was okay.  “Everything is fine, sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you.” “It’s okay, I need to be up soon anyway. Why’d you call, though?” “I just couldn’t get the thought out of my head last night that I must have done something to mess it all up. I wanted to call and make sure I hadn’t.” “You could never, Spencer.”

You know the uncertainty still rears its head, even with the confidence that’s fostered with time. 

“It feels incredibly juvenile,” you say, rolling your eyes and smoothing your hands up his chest to rest on his shoulders. 

“Ask,” he whispers, “I’ll say yes. All you have to do is ask.”

The week after your first date, Spencer showed up at your office, panting, a bag in his hand. You stood up, shocked to see him at the station, and hurried out to meet him in the lobby.  “You said you wanted lunch from the Chinese place down the road because you forgot to pack something,” Spencer said by way of explanation. You had mentioned it, briefly, in a text. “I was just complaining, you didn’t have to spend your lunch break on this,” you said, eyes welling up with tears. You reached forward, ignoring the bags, and pulled him into a hug. “You’re entirely too sweet to me. This was too much.” “Nothing is too much, all you have to do is ask.” 

“When I call back my friend later,” you start, determined to ask while looking in his eyes, drowning as you do it, face heating, “can I tell her my boyfriend came to spend some time with me?”

It’s sort of a cop-out, of course, and Spencer catches it — you’re not directly asking, but he nods anyway, then laughs, leaning forward to kiss you. 

The kiss is messy, he’s laughing and you’re smiling, but you appreciate it all the same. 

“Why are you laughing?” You ask, leaning back and catching another kiss on your nose and then your cheek. 

“There’s a few reasons. I never thought I would have this, for one, and I guess I’m just happy.”

“You guess?”

“I know.”

You wind up in bed. Nothing nefarious, not yet — both of you understand that space to breathe and grow together is much more important and that awkwardness needs to settle into comfortable familiarity before crossing that specific line. 

Spencer drags his finger across your cheek, tracing your bone structure. His other hand is tucked under your side, holding your hip and keeping you close. 

The feeling in your chest is heavy, pressing up into your throat and capturing any words you could dare to think. 

“Are you okay?” Spencer asks, voice a whisper, breath fanning across your face and causing little hairs to prick up across your arms. 

You nod, looking him in the eye and signaling the truth. His nearness wasn’t causing you distress but the unfamiliarity of it is hard to not become consumed by. 

You squeeze your eyes closed, nose scrunching and fight tears. 

“Are you sure?” Spencer asks, voice hesitant, fingers leaving your face and arms pushing to give you space. Space you don’t want. Space that makes your eyes snap open, searching for him, afraid he might waltz off any moment. 

“Yes,” you say, voice certain and hand snapping out to grab him before he can go too far. 

Tears well up in your eyes, against your internal fighting. You huff out an embarrassed laugh, leaning forward to press your forehead into his shoulder. His arms tighten around you, hesitant around your waist and cradling the back of your head. 

“Tell me what’s wrong, please,” he asks, voice soft, begging, an undertone of a demand that you adore. The sense that he would do anything to ensure that you feel better washes over you. It makes the sweetly-sick feeling well up into you further, drowning your senses. 

“Nothing is wrong,” you say, cuddling into him, slipping a foot inbetween his and tangling yourself tighter, “it’s just been a while since I’ve felt … wanted. And I do, now, with you — feel wanted. At least, I hope I am.”

“You are,” Spencer interrupts, reassuring. 

“It’s nice but I don’t really know what to do with it.”

“It?”

“The feeling, I guess.” You shrug. “I suppose touch starved is the right word, but it feels like more than that.”

His grip tightens as your tears come with a faster frequency, to your own annoyance. 

“I’m sorry, this is a really nice moment, I’m beyond happy, I don’t mean to ruin it.” You attempt to pull away to wipe your face but Spencer doesn’t let you. 

“Did you know that some studies show that a lack of connection socially is more detrimental than obesity or smoking? We literally need to feel connected to other people. And that’s just social connection — when left alone without any type of physical connection, specifically physical connection from someone you care about, depression, stress, and physical health can deteriorate. It’s natural to feel overwhelmed when you’re finally getting what you need — what everyone needs.”

“Touch starved,” you whisper, allowing him to hold you tight, relaxing further into his hold.

“Sorry?”

“Touch starved — I’ve heard people call it touch starved.”

Spencers hand moves to stroke your hair, picking up strands and twisting them before smoothing it down again. 

“That feels like an apt term for it.”You fall asleep like that, warm and pressed into his side, listening to him softly tell you about his week, feeling secure and wanted in a way you never have before.

taglist: @0108s22m @bowerfeithwk @screechingphantommaker @cultish-corner @doigettokeepyou @izukuwus

note: i really intended on this being more so please forgive me -- let me know what you think! i welcome constructive criticism as well as any and all thoughts you have!!

now that i've finished this, i might attempt another part to give u guys more but i also am taking requests/thinkin' of new things to write!! more spencer to come, as well as possibly some hotch, so keep an eye out

ily all and tysm for the support <3

[mxltifxnd0m]

if sam was dating a girly girl he would most certainly wear matching pretty pink hello kitty pajamas and watch disney movies and sappy romcoms with you whenever you want and let you do his skincare (full nine like microblading the eyebrows, face masks, serums, oils, face rollers, EVERYTHING) and he’d pretend not to like it but secretly he loves it (secretly he’s js checking u out bc u look rlly good in the pajamas like u do in everything and he would most definitely touch your ass more than once bc he’s very handsy in general) but nonetheless he enjoys it. also he’d let u have the room whatever theme u wanted and if you wanted to wear a onesie out in public but didn’t wanna do it alone he’d go with you. that man is so crazy for you he’d do ANYTHING you asked, like if u asked him to be a housewife he’d put on one of those stupid maid outfit and make it rlly funny and be pouty and sway his hips and js make it a comedy show js to hear ur laughter and see ur smile. he also gets rlly sassy and pouty, like he definitely flips his hair and then when he says something under his breath and ur like “what was that” he’s like “nothing” and sits up straight. also like if you ask him to do something while ur on ur period (like asking him to get u food or sanitary products) he’d be like “ugh why” at first if he’s like sat/laid in a weird but comfy position that can’t be replicated but when you give him that glare he’s immediately like “yes ma’am” and does it, i also have a feeling like he does a little salute sometimes to warrant a giggle or two. he’s js so effortlessly funny and ur effortlessly funny to him, like you’ll js say something and the delivery of it might be funny and he’ll laugh so hard his ribs would toughen and he’d giggle abt it for days (oopsie i yapped quite a lot here sorryy) but yeah u get what im saying sorry for writing sm didn’t realise i went on a tangent

-💽

ARGHHH I LITERALLY CANT I LOVE THIS SO MUCH 💽 ANON!!

like i believe sam becomes a the softest person ever when it comes to his partner and will go along with whatever they want him to do because he loves them so much and just wants to see their radiant smile on their face

(i yapped too much but idk i love this so much)

YESS AHHHD im obsessed with that idea of letting his gf/partner do his skincare because he seems like the kind of guy to kinda care about it, like i feel like he'd do the bare minimum you know like wash his face and put on moisturizer but if his partner wants him to follow their skincare routine then he's all for it. i do agree with you with pretending not to like it but then you see the blissed out look on his face as you rub/massage the moisturizer in his face. and hed def be handsy with you as you stand in between his legs as he sits on the toilet so you can actually reach his face (curse his height) and his hands would def but trailing up and down your legs, grabbing your ass (you tap his cheek when you feel him squeeze your cheeks but all he does his smile at you cheekily), and resting his warm hands on your hips, his thumbs brushing the skin underneath your shirt (SOBBING RN BECAUSE I WANT THIS SOO BADD WITH HIM)

ughh yes he'd let you decorate the room since it's not like he has any experience in interior design but i feel like he'd give some of his input and has great ideas to make the space feel cozy and safe for the two of you! OBSESSED with the idea of just sam being so down bad for his partner that he'd do ANYTHING for his partner and its just aoidhf;aoudfha;u (the thought of that 6'4 man in a onesie that as a hood is so funny but heartwarming bc i can imagine that onesie not fitting him at all and its too short on him so it cuts off at his like shin)

OMMGG SAM IN A MAID OUTFIT @_@ THAT THOUGHT JUST ABOUT KILLED MEE like hladfkfjdba;oiahewfoawef'hsfdiow83r480 but i love sassy sammy and so him paired that maid outfit is giving sub/bratty sam and that's a whole other tangent ill save for later :)

no because i have a period comfort fic im writing and this is literally perfect (im gonna try and incorporate it into the fic please and thank you 💽 anon i love your brain) and he quite literally is your servant when you have your period. LOL i could def see that happening, sam giving you a bit of sass when he lowkey forgot that you were on your period and quickly corrects himself and is at your beck and call (hes fucking whipped for you so its no surprise that he almost buys out the entire store for you)

ARGHHH YESS the two of you just have a bunch of inside jokes and can make each other laugh so easily since you both have similar senses of humor and i believe with my full chest that sam is a giggler than a belly laugher but he does do both and it makes my heart soar when i hear it because we don't hear it often in the show T_T

OMG NO KEEP YAPPING TO ME 💽 ANON! I LITERALLY LOVE TO HEAR WHAT YOU COME UP WITH LIKE ITS SO GOOD AND I LOVE YAPPING ABOUT SAM 🙌🙌

[justlarkin]

can you explain the alt characters in love a hero? Are they just bad end versions?

Yes jk not entirely, but that's what the current theme for the IF versions is. In general, they're just versions of characters from parallel worlds where some key point in their lives went differently from their current world's counterpart like the Marvel What If...? series. I don't think it necessarily has to be bad. IFCrowne and IFAkashi just happened to get the angsty bad ends.

When she was in college, Crowne got a lot of shit from her male classmates since she was a female interested in machines and "FEmaLes sHOuLd sTAy iN tHE KiTcHen". Her male classmates thought she should "learn her place" or some shit, so one day they managed to get her strapped to some machinery and planned on SAing her. The straps were too tight for Crowne to release herself and she noted she probably would've had to chop her arms off to get out, but fortunately that wasn't necessary because her professor intervened in time. Unfortunately, nobody intervened for IFCrowne, they had to free themself (apparently messing up their arms pretty badly in the process). The incident made them hate dudes (and pretty much everyone else) and they decided to get a little sadistic and murdery with their observer powers and equipment.

(Just a side tangent: There's absolutely nothing wrong with IFCrowne's arms in their sprite despite narration saying their arms are fucked up. I know their sleeves are in the way, but you can see through the netting and their arms look fine. I feel like they were going to go through with the SA at first, but they decided to that was too much and dialed it back.)

No clue about IFAkashi yet. We'll have to wait for the next part of the MQ to know his backstory. We do know that his childhood friend, who is different from the Main MC, disappeared and that he hates kaibutsu, which is the only reason he joined the space racists. Just going off the current information: Something either happened to his MC during the kaibutsu incident when they were kids or they disappeared when Broker crammed all of MC's parallel selves into the Main MC. Either way it resulted in IFAkashi getting angsty and depressed, and quitting or never taking up baseball. It definitely has something to do with MC tho because Akashi is obsessed with them in general. There's no way it wouldn't be related to them.

It's kinda weird that IFAkashi is even there because he's just a hero (or villain) and it's not like his parallel weapon is related to traversing parallel worlds. At least in the case of IFCrowne it's because they're an operator who can go wherever tf they want, but not him afaik. How did you get here, Sir. His MC probably did get crammed into the Main MC and the Broker just sent him there to fuck with them like "Oh yeah, your friend is in this world. Oh? Did I forget to mention that your friend was assimilated into their parallel self and is essentially gone? Oopsies! Wanna try to cut them out or fight to the death with your parallel self to win them?" because he treats everyone like Sims he can do fuck all with.

[restartingthisifirelapse]

day 1 (tw: self-harm)

i don’t know why i’m doing this. part of me thinks i just want attention. idk. i want something tangible i guess. something i can actually lose the next time i mess up. cuz right now it’s like “oh nothing bad will happen”. i know that’s wrong, but i can’t convince myself of that.

i fucked up really bad last night. i was almost at a year clean. i was so proud of myself damn. the thing was too, i was having such a damn good day. we went to see the nutcracker, like a professional one. typically we would go to this children’s production, which is good in its own right, but damn this one was so impressive.

and everything with my family was so good too, you know? nobody was upset at me, nobody was being mean to me. i was having a good time with my brothers, my stepmom didn’t seem pissed off, my dad seemed chill. and then i fucked up.

it’s always stupid to see what ends up getting me. i’ve already been in a bad place, i just went through a rough breakup. (as i alter this and see my writing get confusing talking about two exes, i’ll call them percy.) rough in the way of i’m still in love with percy but they started being mean, and manipulative and confusing, so i broke up with them. that isn’t the whole story either, though. i was feeling lonely cuz percy wasn’t talking to me. another ex, i’ll say sunny, has been lowkey flirting with me throughout my entire relationship. but one night, when percy wasn’t talking to me, sunny just kept complimenting. it made me so flustered and i went to bed giggling. i can’t believe i did that to percy. i love percy, i really do, i care about them so much. and i fell asleep flustered, heart fluttering from somebody else. that was when i knew i had to break up with them, cuz now i’m the problem. i’m the asshole in this situation.

that was such an unnecessary tangent oh my god. i do that a lot. but regardless, that to say i was already feeling like shit. then my dad knocks on my door, and he’s really upset with me. i’ve been really busy recently, and my parents don’t know my schedule. up til now i’ve been too scared to drive, but recently with job opportunities opening up for me, i’ve been wanting to learn. less stress on my parents. my stepmom works mornings, and we have one car. i had to be at my place by 9am. and he was so upset. “i don’t want to have to wake up at 3 to drop of your stepmom to come back and take you to your thing at 9″. that’s what got to me.

one reason why i fell in love with percy was because of how thoughtful they are. we were friends before dating and i had been complaining to them about dishes, and they told me “yeah, i always feel so bad about not doing dishes cuz then my parents have to do them after work.” and i felt so embarrassed for how thoughtless i was, and i felt so in love with how thoughtful they were. and now i’m not even thinking about my parents’ sleep schedule. god i’m so awful. i’m a horrible person. maybe i shouldn’t have broken up with them.

a few minutes of tears later and suddenly i’m opening up my stupid tracker app because of an oopsie. i feel dumb about it though. not, like, horrifically stupid. that’s an upgrade and i’m proud of it. typically when this has happened before, i’d be so low. i’d just keep going, and going, for at least three days but usually a week. but now i don’t feel like that. now i just think “damn. now i gotta get it back up again.” i’m really proud of that.

i don’t have any, like, big big reason to not cut myself. i have tiny ones though. for one, obviously, it hurts. in the moment the hurt is so good, like that’s the whole point. shuts up the emotions and whatnot. but after the fact? when you’re trying to go through everyday life? when you’re taking a shower and the water hits the cut? it fucking stings, oh my god. and i used to love the sting, but now it’s the worst. like jesus.

another reason is, like, i have kids. not ones i birthed or adopted, but i teach. and i have little brothers. my stepmom told me when she found out “how would you feel if you found out they were hurting themselves?” it was so scary cuz, in the moment, i was so scared i wouldn’t care. but now i’m watching kids go through really bad moments of self-consciousness, and i just want to hug them and make sure they’re never hurting again. i’m supposed to believe that somebody feels that way about me. i’ll get there someday.

also, i’m a gamer lmao. i’m a kind of person who wants to beat my high score. i can’t wait for when i get to 226 days this time.

so, yeah. i want to make this blog so i can have something i know i can lose. i’m a writer too. typically, if i write something i’m proud of, i want to save it in my notes. if i write something like this, like a journal entry type deal, i want to save it in my notes to look back on. i’m not going to save anything until i get to a year. i don’t want to save anything, so that way i won’t want to delete anything. i don’t know. hopefully it works. no copy paste for me.

but yeah. wish me luck lmao.

[mysticsapphicsblog]

The aquarium as a date, seems so cute tbh. No doubts, just fishies. :( <3

Yes little fishes and when the when the rays come up to the edge of the tank with their lil smiley faces and the starfish and the glowy fish and the cool domes and the-

[bakatenshii]

oh no like the new friends hehe sorry to have gotten u confused!!

OOOO!! yes yes! so since miki’s server’s mostly for her friends and followers, I actually don’t know loads of people in there but I’m glad because it means I get to meet new people and make new friends hehe

it’s deffo not moots only! <33

[heygrrrlratpiss]

Assigning each Lost Boy one of my favorite albums

Hi! This is my first ever post from a different fandom! I thought of this idea several days ago, but I just haven’t gotten the chance to make it until now. It’s by no means an original idea, but I thought it’d be fun to do so you guys can get to know my tastes :) also I apologize for making all of the albums female fronted, I just prefer female voices haha, I also went a bit Anthony Fantano with my explanations and turned them into album reviews oopsies :3 I’m probably gonna do the other characters too, so stay tuned for that!!

David

A Prayer Under Pressure of Violent Anguish - My Ruin

This was kind of a hard one for me because I couldn’t really find an album I really like that screams David, but I think this one suits him pretty well. There are some songs on here that aren’t really him lyric wise, but the music itself is pretty heavy, and the way Tairrie B. sings is real intense, which I think David would really enjoy, being the edgelord that he is LMAO plus there’s some songs that talk about religion, and I thought that would be something he’d be into because I feel like he’d think it’s funny he’s a vampire and he’s listening to songs about Christianity, even though they’re written in a negative light.

Dwayne

Clear Hearts Grey Flowers - Jack Off Jill

Dwayne. Dwayne. My favorite boy, literally he is the only guy ever, so this wasn’t a hard choice. CHGF is a very punk and gothic rock driven album, which is something I think Dwayne would really like. It has a much more mature, polished sound than JOJ’s other albums, Sexless Demons and Scars and Humid Teenage Mediocrity, but it isn’t completely mellowed down, which I feel reflects his personality (he’s wayyy more unhinged then he lets on ;D). There are some “calmer” songs on the album, though they still keep the same broodiness seen throughout the album, which is also something I think is very Dwayne.

Paul

Fantastic Wounds - Schoolyard Heroes

Fantastic Wounds is one of my absolute favorites of all time; it’s campy, dramatic, and nothing I’ve never, ever heard of before. Ryann Donnelly, the lead singer, she does multiple voice parts, which includes her normal singing voice, opera, screaming and shrieking, and her own dramatic way of singing (listen to the album, and you’ll get what I mean), which is something Paul would absolutely love. Her voice is also very feminine and shrill with strangely sugary sweet, cutesy vocals, something I think Paul would get addicted to. The record is just all over the place, but it’s still cohesive, which makes it easy to focus on, and I think Paul would appreciate that since he’s got the attention span of a golden retriever puppy, but it’s by no means boring. It sounds exactly like the soundtrack to a cheesy, campy horror movie. Even the toned down songs are far from mild! It’s just a fun listen, and I wish Schoolyard Heroes was still together so they could make even more amazing records (I kinda went on a tangent with this one, sorry LOL I’ve just been absolutely in love with this record for the past four years).

Marko

Bricks Are Heavy - L7

Okay we all know none of the boys shy away from punk (the music and subculture, though I don’t really think you can like one and not the other tbh), and I’m a firm believer that this includes femme punk. The Lost Boys can be feminists, as a little treat (for me) I’m fine with them murdering people but I draw the line at misogyny and bigotry /hj. I headcanon Marko as the one who’s the most into punk rock among the guys. Bricks Are Heavy starts off the bat with Wargasm, anti-war song that’s weirdly sexual but for good reason (did you know I also headcanon Marko to be a huge fucking horndog?). The rest of the album is mainly political, save for a couple of songs, but they’re not any less aggressive or impactful; they’re very hard to forget, just like Marko!

[saturnznct]

doyoung’s family | k.dy

➸ note; alot of people requested some doyoung so here u go <33

➸ word count; 2239 words

➸ (by end) byungchul; aged 5, kyungmin & deoksu; newborn

nct masterlist

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

kim byungchul -

Firstly I have thought about this quite a lot and I don’t think Doyoung would have an oopsy baby at all

I feel like he’s big into family planning and very responsible

And I also feel like he just wouldn’t give two fucks ab the company or anything,, as soon as he gets broody like he’s telling you that he wants to have a baby

Usually you would just shoot him down, reminding him of all of the cons and negatives of his environment, and why it wouldn’t be fair to involve a child in all of that,, and he would eventually back down but feel a bit :/ about it

n e ways

Once he eventually completes his military service and NCT turns a whole 10 years old you get married and your wishes to have a child eventually match his <3

It takes maybe 4 or 5 months but you eventually fall pregnant and ur both ecstatic for obvious reasons

Doyoung feels like he has to tell EVERYONE and it takes him a lot of self restraint to not blurt it out in front of all of the members after you repeatedly tell him that you should wait a while

You do get quite sick… not too sick though, just the average dizziness and vomiting but it simmers down after a few months

I feel like he would try his best to comfort you but he would honestly really annoy you sometimes

Like you’d feel really nauseous and just want to sit quietly while trying to fight it off but he just keeps talking to you and trying to make you laugh and ur just sat in front of the toilet like SHUT UP if you make me laugh I may projectile vomit all over you and you WONT be happy

I think I went on a bit of a tangent there

I could just imagine it sorry

I feel like he’s quite chill when it comes down to it. Like he clearly cares and is very passionate about raising and giving your child everything but he’s not in a rush to buy baby clothes immediately or anything

You just take it one day at a time for the first twelve weeks, deciding to just set aside money and worry about buying things later

Doyoung MAKES SURE that he has the day off for your first ultrasound

Literally he does not care what he has to miss he will BE THERE

He sits right beside you, holding your hand the whole time, but he does laugh at you a bit when the cold gel makes you squirm

Holds your hand the whole time and 100% cries when you finally see the baby on the screen

After you’re sure everything is safe and okay literally every single member of every group and every single SM employee knows

He shows them the ultrasound photo in his wallet and he’s like look <3 I have a baby on the way

Also explains to you why everybody is suddenly very doting and gentle with you and the 127 members randomly send a massive bouquet of flowers to your house

I feel like Doyoung would act like normal in public but be very doting on you in private

Loves to cuddle w you and put his arm around your bump and just kind of take in the fact that its real

A big bulk of your pregnancy is in winter and you find yourself being extra sensitive to the cold and Doyoung makes sure you’re always wrapped in lots of blankets drinking warm drinks

Honestly you love this Doyoung, he’s not usually nearly as soft as this and you love it

He buys you lots of candles and thick knit cardigans to wear when you go out

TELL ME HE WOULDN’T SING TO THE BABY

Sometimes he goes a bit too hard on the vocals and ur like ‘you know they can’t appreciate all the ballads you sing them’ and he’s like ‘what do u mean they’re my child of course they can appreciate a good rendition of from home’

You also discover that IOU is their favourite NCT song, they kick like MAD

You decide not to find out whether its a boy or a girl, just for the sake of more excitement

Although you’re both fairly confident its a boy, even though you both promise not to have the argument

Once spring is coming to a close you start getting properly excited

Doyoung and Jaehyun paint the nursery (white and lilac colour scheme, Doyoung’s choice) while you sit in your new rocking chair (which Doyoung carries into the living room because ‘YOU CANT BE AROUND THE PAINT FUMES’)

You sleep a lot leading up to it

Doyoung is just there to hold you, knowing that in a few short months you’ll be incredibly sleep deprived

Although every so often you wake up needing to pee lmao

Summer eventually rolls in and its awful for you

Its really hot and sticky and gross and you just feel so uncomfy

You spend most of your time at home in like shorts and a small top/your bra with the air con and fan blasting

Because of the heat the last few weeks you always feel quite nauseous and you get quite sick again

You go into labour at home

You wake up feeling vey intense contractions and you’re in a fuck ton of pain

You think maybe its just cramps for a bit but then you eventually realise and Doyoung is like shit

After your contractions get closer and closer he takes you into hospital

And you have lil Byungchul early in the morning in mid July <3

Its quite a nice experience, its nighttime and its quiet and he doesn’t give you too much trouble

Hes a longboi,, literally 22 inches long

And also very big, like 8 pounds

And Doyoung is just in love

You’re really tired and laying in bed just absolutely exhausted and Doyoung is just standing by the window bouncing him in his arms

‘I told you he’d be a boy,’ he laughs, lifting Byungchul up so that his tiny hand grazes his face.

‘I agreed with you,’ you whine, ‘stop making it out like I argued with you.’

You realise really quickly that Doyoung is the most doting and loving father ever

He spends a lot of time cuddling him

He loves to like do things for him, like give him his bottle or calm him down when he cries

I feel like Doyoung would talk about his family just like he talks about his brother  sometimes but I think he’d be quite private and want to protect Byungchul’s privacy

We all know how much he hates sasaengs hello

He would definitely fight on behalf of both of you

Because he loves you both so much

Doyoung is definitely his favourite parent 100%, its very obvious but it melts your heart so you deal with it

He always always goes to his dad or asks for his dad first if he needs something

When he’s little NCT have a show in Japan and so you take him and you go to Disneyland and u have to just stop yourself from bursting into tears of pride because they’re just SO CUTE

we all know that Doyoung would be supportive of his kids like literally no matter what

he would let Byungchul do whatever he wanted

Like when he would tell you what career he wanted to pursue that week Doyoung would always encourage him and tell him that he could do any job he wanted

Sometimes when he visits Doyoung at work and he asks all the stylists to put some glittery eyeshadow on him and paint his nails black

Also very well dressed?? Doyoung isn’t big on designer clothes for the baby because ‘they’re a waste, he will grow out of them in no time’ but he still wears nice clothes (and Doyoung would never admit it but he likes to match with him, they have lots of matching clothes, especially matching sweaters)

He loves to spend time with Byungchul, its his actual favourite thing in the world

He likes to take him to places like cafes and pretty public gardens and art galleries and takes pictures of him and omg I can just imagine it

I sense a cuddler,,,, in both of them

When Byungchul is a young toddler he goes through a phase where he is just attached to you or Doyoung like a koala

And Doyoung really likes the attention, he can’t lie

As Byungchul grows up Doyoung starts to want another

Obviously he’s extremely close with his brother so he really really wants Byungchul and his future sibling to have the same level of closeness

So he brings it up with you<3 and you agree

kim deoksu & kim kyungmin (identical twins)

Obviously very expected

Doyoung is absolutely thrilled

Like the thought of Byungchul actually having a lil friend

Byungchul is kind of confused by the concept of having a sibling

But once you explain it’s just like Lucas and Noah he gets it

And he was actually seemingly excited

Sometimes he’d be playing with his toy cars in his room and he’d be like ‘mummy/mommy when will my little brother or sister be here to play cars w me’

And you just have to explain that they gave to actually grow in your stomach first

At 12 weeks you find out it’s twins <3

Naturally youre shocked, like you only ever planned to have two, but you were definitely happy to find out it was twins

Like your youngest children will literally have a built in best friend each

You have an overall okay pregnancy

You decide to find out the genders this time, just to make things a little easier (and also because Byungchul kept asking whether or not he was going to have a brother)

So when u found out it was two boys

Lets just say you were very glad you could give Byungchul what he desperately wanted

Byungchul is quite interested by the whole process, he always asks about them and also helps Doyoung paint the nursery

This time before you go to bed, he sings two songs, claiming one for each help

Also talks to them individually, eventually addressing them each by name

I don’t think he’d be the type to make them match or anything, so you accumulate lots of tiny baby grows in various different colours

Again the majority of your pregnancy is in summer it is PAIN

By the end you’re so sweaty and uncomfortable that you literally just want them to be out so so badly

So you do try very hard

It’s hard to move around properly since you are carrying around the weight of like 3 whole people

Byungchul had gone back to school at this point so you and Doyoung were just home alone all day

Does anyone remember that episode of Good Luck Charlie where Amy really wants to go into labour so she and Teddy try like a fuckton of things

That’s you

Bouncing on a ball, spicy food everything

Nothing works like at all

You start to get quite frustrated

Doyoung tries really hard to comfort you but eventually you do go into labour

It goes on forever

Like?? Ur last one was nice and peaceful and Byungchul just came out no problems no faff

But with Deoksu and Kyungmin they just hate you

Firstly it just goes on for ages, and the contractions are really strong and painful and its just horrible </3

Doyoung tries to comfort you, and holds you through it, massaging your scalp and trying to rock you to sleep so you can sleep through it

You do fall asleep a few times but always wake up when you get a particularly painful contraction

After nearly 30 hours you’re finally fully dilated

Just before you start pushing the midwives ask him if he would like to deliver the babies

And at first he looks to you for permission

But you’re in far too much pain to speak really so you kind of just nod weakly

So Doyoung gets dressed in scrubs

You would’ve laughed at him but you’re a bit preoccupied

Deoksu is born first

Doyoung, with guidance from the midwife pulls him out and holds him for a few seconds, before passing him off to be weighed and checked over etc

Three minutes later Kyungmin is out, and once again Doyoung takes him to the midwives and by that time he can take Deoksu back to you and place him on your chest

You spend a few minutes just doting on him and crying over him and trying to calm him down

Eventually they’ve checked Kyungmin over, and they bring him to you and lay them next to each other and they actually calm down surprisingly

A few hours later when Byungchul gets to visit he’s just so enthralled by then

You get to take them home the next day

You sit in between them in the backseat, Doyoung drives like a snail because he doesn’t want to disturb them lmao

Anyway when you’re finally home it just feels amazing, like finally your little family is fully complete u feel like ur gonna burst

And Byungchul loves the twins so much <3

[spiked-tea-writing]

Dead Poets Society (1989) Gender-Bent Recast

Yara Shahidi as Nicole Perry. Look at that smile. I love her so much, and her beauty matches Neil so well. I really love her in The Sun is Also a Star.

Alisha Boe as Tommie Anderson. Alright, confession time: I’ve never seen 13 Reasons Why. But I was looking for another young actress and I started watching compilations of her in that show, and fell in love. She’s stunning and talented and she seems to encapsulates vulnerability very well. Oopsie I went off on a tangent.

Madeleine Arthur as Charlotte “Charlie” Dalton. I love her in TATBILB. That’s it. I rest my case.

Amandla Stenberg as Kiera Overstreet. OMG her in Everything, Every Thing is what fuels me. I also love Nick Robinson. Her in The Hate U Give is also incredibly moving. Did I mention I lover her too? Her work I think is incredibly important when it comes to representation.

Paris Berlec as Sadie Meeks. She is the best part of the shit show that is Tall Girl. I love her and she comes off very smart and educated, but also sweet and adorable just like Meeks. 

Kristine Froseth as Grace Pitts. She’s tall and beautiful. That’s it. 

Madelaine Petsch as Roxanne Cameron. Aww we are keeping the evil red-head train going. She’s gorgeous and evil but I also don’t want to see her get punched in the face so I’m conflicted. Tbh what else is new.

Janelle Monáe as Josephine Keating. Hidden Figures

was such an amazing film, and her performance is flawless. She would bring a little more edge and sarcasm to Keating and would be a fantastic and empowering teacher.

Asa Butterfield as Christopher “Chris” Noel. I love Sex Education. I’d love to see him work with Amandla Stenberg. Also he’s so sweet, which matches as Chris.

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

imagine of Storm had to have legal custody of Jet because he's only 14

this is sorta what happens in my canon actually!

basically, the way babylonian customs work is that the heir-leader can form the next generation of babylon rogues when he (yes, he) turns 16, preferably 18 though. however, there were a couple things that went wrong with our birds:

1. Storm (who is not the heir-leader) was born first. like, too many years early, his dad is young and tbh kindof a dilf but i will make another post about him later!

2. the mechanic is supposed to be the youngest, but Wave was born in the middle. Also uh, they usually don't want girls unless they're the second-in-command (Storm's position) because it would make the leader-intercessor dynamic "more successful" because heterosexuals etc etc but once again the ages didn't work. Also, mechanics are supposed to be the power type whereas second-in-commands are flight type so they can scope out and help with the planning/collaboration with the heir-leader but Wave (despite being ridiculously strong) is not the power type, Storm is.

3. Jet was born last and also he's trans in my canon so his family just fucking gave up at that point and dropped him off with Storm's dad (who is hated by the other Babylonians bc fuck tradition he was never raised traditionally either and skipped a few steps since his older brother was supposed to have kids and was the traditional second-in-command but he died which is why Storm has 0 knowledge of babylonian culture and traditions in ZG and why he's also the least defined/trained bc he wasn't raised to be an heir he wasn't even on the table neither was his dad so it was an oopsies but OKAY NO MORE LORE TANGENTS MOVING ON)

One more thing first though 😜 Wave's dad also yeets (but we love him okay??? ok) and he didn't have a choice so instead of being burdened with her step-daughter Wave's stepmom also dropped her with Storm's dad.

What's the issue? Well, while Wave and Storm are ready to be full-time babylon rogues, they gotta wait for Jet to turn 16 first... oh and btw they don't get any of their old money either so they're living off of Storm's single dad's prison guard salary that's off of Prison Island 😎👉👉 oh and Bean is there long story just go with it but dw he disappears at one point to do his normal shenanigans

Wave pulls a sneaky and basically prevents Jet from ever having to experience actual AFAB experiences by like, illegally letting him transition at a dangerously young age. But also Jet's dad doesn't stop it because like... he does need a son. Like, they'll all die out and their insurmountable wealth dating back to the dawn of fucking civilization will be given to the mobian government or like, GUN... so fine. Transphobia on the backburner for now, give me a son and we won't talk about it. Wave also uses this as a perfect opportunity to fuck up her own body for a while for funzies and that's gonna have consequences later in one of my fics! But I digress once more

What was I supposed to be talking about....? RIGHT! STORM ADOPTING JET!!! Well, the rogues don't really follow the standardized legal system but they're all allowed to have the airship when Storm turned 16 based on babylonian custom so that's when they start fucking shit up for fun around the world, and also stealing because they don't really have money besides required amenities (so like I should clarify rn that the rogues get money but they have to request it and log their expenses So stuff like gas, food, entertainment within reason, medical emergencies, etc... are covered almost always, but if you want HRT or a nail appointment they're gonna use the request letter as toilet paper)

When Wave turned 16 they were allowed to compete in global or international extreme gear events (mechanic needs to be a certain age— another reason why she hates Tails so much in riders because Team Sonic got to skip all protocol and legal requirements despite being heroes and law-abiding at least in appearance, meanwhile the nomad rogues who don't even count as citizens are forced to oblige. ANYWAYS!) They could do national competitions and off-track races and unofficial stuff to build up their rep but anything comparable to like, how we treat the Olympics or PanAm are off the table until Wave was old enough. Technically this is a win for the rogues because normally you have to wait longer since mechanics are supposed to be the youngest member (bright innovative minds, also as the power-member the careers of the heir-leader and second-in-command will last longer and give them more time to gain experience and seasoned skills). However, since the birth order got fucked up, Jet is a LOT fucking younger than when his ancestors started racing on a global scale (12 instead of 16/18 like WHAT?!? king shit)

So, as a summary of everything I rambled and all the things I didn't develop for the sake of word-count and also just my fingers:

the rogues don't really do the whole "legal custody" thing that everyone else does, but yeah, storm's age and sometimes wave's age counts as custody for babylonian regulations 😌 more like group project supervision with -3 braincells but it counts!!! hash tag found family

[just-another-hhazbin]

i have SO MANY headcanons get ready

first of allll........i heacanon angel has both bpd and hpd (bc so do i 😳). bpd is characterized by feeling isolated, intense emotions that the sufferer struggles to deal with, extreme fear of abandonment, drug/alcohol use, and suicidal ideation. on the other hand hpd is characterized by acting seductively and/or dramatically for attention (positive or negative), high sensitivity to criticism, constantly seeking reassurance and validation, and being excessively self centered.

and i like to think there’s some canon evidence to back me up here bc angel definitely seems to struggle with being seen as weak/not being good enough and reacts harshly when vaggie insults his appearance. i also headcanon angel is hypersexual and thinks the only reason anyone would ever love him is for sex, which is Sad but also a mood

that got long oopsie 😳 okay Anyway i also hc both angel and alastor are afab nonbinary 🥺 angel is genderfluid (goes from male to gender neutral to female uvu) and doesn’t really. care about pronouns but would say he/him if asked. alastor is agender (previously id’d as a trans guy) and their pronouns are he/they/it.

bonus hc: alastor has not otherwise specified psychotic disorder, basically in the form of auditory hallucinations (voices laughing and telling him to do things) with no other features. [as u can tell i’m projecting but Anyway]. al also has pretty graphic intrusive thoughts. one of the reasons he hates being close with people is because he’s afraid he’ll hurt them and end up being all alone again.

I need ALL the headcanons. 👀 They are my sole sustenance besides caffeine and chicken afjashdjfhasjkfs. 

Also, because I will repeat this on each and every single ask that discusses neurodivergent headcanons because I know some of y’all will yap about it if I don’t - we are firmly ignoring the implications of any character being canonly neurodivergent and what kind of rep that might provide while acknowledging that being neurodivergent has nothing to do with what makes a person “good” or “bad.” We also do not invalidate any neurodivergency in this house. Cool? Cool. Onwards!

The projection mood... 📓✍️  I can definitely see Angel with both/either of those disorders. He definitely shows signs of both from the glimpses we see in both the pilot and addict, though obligatory disclaimer that his environment between the drugs and Valentino definitely isn’t helping, him seeking out the risks and rush and attention, etc from those industries would be in line with either or both of those... I need more notes emojis asfhkjashf. But yes, I definitely see Angel exhibiting behavior in canon that would line up with those headcanons.  

I can also definitely see and understand hypersexual!Angel Dust, though I am somewhat guilty of harboring a love for ace!Angel Dust as well. Do I think hypersexual is much more likely canon-wise than ace? Yup. Do I love it anyway... yes I do.  I also agree with him seeing himself as unlovable and wanted only for sex - the implied abuse of Henroin would have damaged his self-esteem enough, nevermind some - 70? - years of working under Valentino, he of the abusive behavior and possible/probable gaslighting, along with whatever Anthony was doing in his life topside.

We know my nonbinary ass loves some nonbinary headcanons. Genderqueer Alastor and Angel Dust... are so important to meeee... (wipes a tear from my eye dramatically).  I tend to put Angel Dust somewhere between trans and genderqueer more than genderfluid, just someone who’s fully comfortable with himself/themself and knows he looks rocking no matter how he presents himself. But I can also see him as genderfluid! 🤔 Hell, I’m agender and I still have days where I poke myself and feel one gender more than another. The nonbinary mood...

Agender Alastor is something I love with all my agender heart, absolutely yes. (Nobody talk to me, I’m projecting.)  I know we’ve talked about agender al on here before but damnit we’re talking about them again. I think Alastor just does whatever the fuck Alastor wants, and when asked about a gender, it isn’t “boy” or “girl” or etc., it’s just... Alastor. They’re just themself. I do tend to have my agender Alastor use he/him pronouns more than they/them, just because he’s grown comfortable with them and is a bit stuck in the 1930s, but he’s also comfortable with they/them. It/Its are incredibly valid pronouns, but Experiences have led to them not being my personal preference.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯  (And I stress the personal there. And then point to me projecting ajfdhskdhfas.)

[We all project a bit, it’s valid.] I’ve never really thought much about the possibility of him hearing voices, but with his impulsive behavior and mood swings from topside I wouldn’t necessarily be surprised, and I especially wouldn’t be surprised given his afterlife connection to the Loa and, ya know, the whole “Radio” thing.

I definitely headcanon Alastor as someone who is very impulsive and does have intrusive thoughts that he’s sometimes more than happy to carry out (ie on strangers) but is less than pleased with when they involve himself or those he cares about. He has no real desire to see his people hurt, but he’ll still catch himself thinking about it, maybe the shadows darkening a bit, his hands straying... and then he’ll catch himself and make up an excuse to hurriedly leave and collect himself elsewhere or go on a killing spree as an (invalid) coping method.  I also agree that I definitely think Alastor fears loneliness and silence, and maybe I’ve just read Jadeile’s “Afterlife” too many times, but you cannot convince me that Alastor isn’t a touch-starved extrovert. He was a charming and popular radio host in life, he probably had all the attention he could’ve wanted and then some. That’s probably how he made a few of his kills, even. But in Hell where every other street his plastered with signs warning people to run from him? Yeah. Also, he’s just incredibly clingy and manhandling through the pilot, and I think part of that is because he’s finally around people who won’t just run screaming if he so much as speaks to them (unlike pretty much everyone else, as seen in the comic).

Okay, I went off on a couple tangents there, but. Yes. I’m done now sadkjfh.

[unwcvering]

[ hc + king ]

@regalius || headcanon meme || accepting

       King is just a title.

       To Waver, it means a great figure deserving of his respect, regardless if it was obtained through heroic merit, royalty, or instilling fear into those beneath them. He would be less likely to truthfully call someone a King if they relied on tactics of the latter, only a temporary respect, as he would consider that a dictator than a rightful King. He wouldn’t want to follow someone like that, but he values his life a lot more than to argue and potentially be killed for running his mouth.

       When a Heroic Spirit address themselves as ‘King of – ’ he will acknowledge it, and consider them a king of their era, but in the present he sees them as anyone else possessing confidence and a name that might have warranted a reaction in a different time. That isn’t to say he isn’t impressed by what they have done, because he will research and do his history homework to find out their achievements, yet how they treat him and act in the current era will determine whether he sees them as a worthy King or not.

       These are more Waver’s thoughts than El-Melloi II’s. His older self would just treat them like another person, respecting them because he sees them as any other being like himself. More powerful, yes – But as their Master and the other half of their bound contract, he won’t expect to be treated any differently because of Command Seals just as he would not want to be treated lesser by them. He believes a true King leads those that stand beside them and doesn’t think themselves superior to those beneath their reign.

       There is only one person that Waver calls as his King, however. It is obvious,                      so no need to go on a rant about that LOOOOL.

[ill-skillsgard]

Henry’s Birthday Weekend - Saturday - His Mistress

Warning: 18+ sex/mentions of sex work/slight degradation

Note: Hi, guys! How are you all holding up during this Bill drought? I’ve been trying to keep myself busy and distracted from the fact that I can’t really go anywhere except the grocery store. Hopefully, this will serve as a distraction for you as it has for me. Reblogs are extremely appreciated in this dry spell, comments make me happy and likes are great too.

This is a direct continuation of Friday Night, if you haven’t read it.

 Enjoy!

Read more Henry x Mistress imagines here > Masterpost

You knew he would come home livid. That was all right; you had prepared for the storm by dawning a new set underneath your casual clothes. It was an outfit of black lace and gold accents. But he wouldn’t know until he arrived.

 At a quarter past eleven, you heard his keys in the lock of the front door and turned on the couch to greet him with an oily smile. There was no use in playing dumb. You would consider it a miracle if one of his colleagues didn’t reveal you as the culprit during their romp to the nearest and classiest strip-joint. And judging by the way he pushed open the door and settled his eyes on you, the truth had surfaced.

 “Why?” he asked.

 You let the question resonate through the condo before shrugging. 

 “Why not?”

 “Because! That’s why!”

 “Oh,” you nodded. “Because. Yes. An excellent reason.”

 “I am so angry with you!” Henry belted.

 “How angry?”

 He tossed his keys onto the kitchen island and looked down at his jacket, huffing as he dusted glitter from the sleeves. “I don’t even think I can look at you right now.”

 “But you’re looking at me,” you pointed out.

 “And they took my phone!”

 “Good. So everything went according to plan.”

 “Plan? What plan? You planned on having me kidnapped and dumped into a den of strippers?”

 A giggle escaped your lips, and you touched your fingertips to your mouth, feigning a look of innocence. “Oopsy.”

 “No! No oopsy! That was completely out of line. I can’t believe you’d do that! And with Frank, nonetheless!”

 “Oh, come on, Henry. What’s so bad about getting some boobies pushed up against your face?”

 “Everything!” He shouted.

 Henry took several laps around the kitchen, fetching himself a shallow glass of water that went down like soot, then turning back toward you and remembering he did not wish to see your evil grin.

 “Babe, come on. Didn’t you have any fun? Not even a little?”

 “No. That was horrible. Degrading, even! And they wouldn’t let me leave.”

 “Degrading? What’s degrading about it?”

 Henry opened his arms wide, pointing out the window at the city below. “Someone’s daughter was rubbing her... Her everything all over my lap!”

 “What?” You pouted. “You don’t like the idea of someone’s daughter giving you a lap dance?”

 He caught the twist in your tone, softened for a breath, then shook his head and reangled his brows to look exceptionally pissed. “Strip clubs are... They’re disgusting.”

 “I thought I told them to bring you to Nikki’s? It’s classy!”

 “Oh, right, yeah... is it classy for my coworkers to pay a stripper to pour a shot down her ass-crack? I smell like pussy and Jagermeister!”

 You covered your mouth before another giggle could set Henry off on a tangent.

 “How is this so funny to you? Are you insane?” He asked.

 “I’m sorry, baby. I just thought you might want a little time with your friends for your birthday.”

 Henry shook his head, his frown turning into a cocked grin that still illustrated his objection. “No, no! No, no, no. Those guys aren’t my friends. I can barely stand them in a professional sense, so what makes you think I’d want to go to a strip club with them against my will?”

 “You’re a big boy. You could have left.”

 “No, for your information, I could not. They confiscated my phone and keys!”

 The plan had played out exactly how you imagined it would. You stood up and sauntered over to Henry, who was propping himself on the island. He pulled away from you but didn’t go far enough to evade your embrace for long.

 “Henry, do you really dislike naked girls or is this about something else?”

 “I’m not going to tell you I like naked women. That’s a trap waiting to happen.”

 “It’s not a trap,” you clutched his jaw, facing him so your eyes met. “Do you think I’d be offended if you said you are attracted to women?”

 “I don’t know,” he mumbled.

 “Yes, you do.”

 “No. I guess not.”

 “If you stood right here and said ‘babe, I think naked women are fun to look at,’ what do you think my response would be?”

 “I don’t know. You’d probably have some smart-ass thing to say.”

 Henry avoided looking at you, so you stood on the tips of your toes and kissed his cheek until his shoulders slumped and his arms relaxed. “I’d say ‘hell yeah. Naked chicks are great’.”

 “I still don’t see your point,”

 “Do you watch porn?”

 “No!” Henry exclaimed.

 “Henry,” your voice dropped an octave. “Don’t lie to me.”

 “Okay, yes. I’ve watched some.”

 “And did you enjoy it?”

 He scoffed again and rolled his eyes, a pinkness creeping over the crests of his cheeks. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

 “You liked it,” you said. “You really liked it.”

 “How do you know?”

 “Because your face is turning red as a tomato.”

 “What does watching porn have to do with tonight?”

 “I’m just trying to make a point to you, Henry. I’m not the kind of person who gets upset over things like that. Hell, I watch porn all the time.”

 “You do?” He sounded shocked.

 “Yes!”

 “Wh-why?” He asked.

 “Because it’s hot.”

 “But,” Henry shook his head again. “I don’t get it.”

 “It’s not like I’m watching it and saying, ‘oh, I’d like that guy to fuck me.’ It’s more like ‘hm, I like sex and watching other people have it arouses me.’ It’s not cheating. It’s human nature.”

 “But you’re getting off to another person.”

 “So if you were to masturbate while thinking of someone in an erotic situation, is that cheating? Even if you’re completely alone in bed?”

 “I suppose not.”

 “Do you think about me every time you masturbate?” You asked.

 “I don’t... Do that,” Henry said.

 “You’ve sent me videos of you playing with yourself.”

 “Okay, but that doesn’t count! I did that for you.”

 You pulled away from him, turned around, and he followed. “You’ve never rubbed one out on your own for the entire time we’ve been together?”

 Henry expelled air from his nose and sighed. “Why would I need to when I have you?”

 “What about when we’re not together?”

 “When we’re apart, I’m working.”

 “Henry, I know you’re trying to sound like the virtuous gentleman to me, but you’re preaching to the wrong choir.”

 “I know!” he said. “I know you’re a hundred times more progressive than my ex, but you must understand where I’m coming from. I’m just not used to all this kind of stuff being acceptable topics of conversation.”

 You took his hand, but instead of hugging him again, you pushed him into the couch, securing him to the cushion with your foot hovering an inch from his groin. 

 “What that woman did to you is a crime. I’ll never understand how somebody with access to a cock like that would do anything less than worship it every day, but you need to start getting yourself out of that constrictive little bubble of thinking. I’m not Mary. And even if we were from the same generation, I’d still never understand. Sexuality isn’t a sin, just like paying a dancer to dance is not.”

 You took a step back and unfastened the first three buttons of your blouse, exposing a hint of lace to Henry’s wandering eyes. His breath caught in his throat, silencing him as he watched.

 “Oh, you’re such a good boy. I suppose... If I were to start stripping for you right now, you wouldn’t have a good time.”

 “I would!” He defended.

 “But you just said it’s degrading. Do you think I’m degrading myself by showing you this lovely bra underneath my top?”

 He chewed his bottom lip while the flush of his face remained stagnant. “It would be degrading if there was a pack of howling men at your feet, throwing singles at you.”

 “A woman making money by using her natural gifts is anything but degrading to her. You conservatives need to start understanding that.”

 “Oh, so now we’re getting political?” Henry asked with a slight smirk.

 “No. You’re being quiet, and I’m dancing for you.”

 You opened your blouse, revealing the see-through lace and your nipples peeking around embroidered flower petals. Henry’s eyes locked onto your chest, so you scooped your breasts up with both hands, squeezing them together to show him all he was missing.

 “If you slipped a bill into my bra right now, would that be disgusting?” You asked.

 “No.”

 “Exactly.”

 “For the record, I didn’t use any of my own money. Frank paid for it all.”

 “Oh, I know,” you dismissed. “He insisted.”

 “Fucking asshole,” Henry whispered.

 “Tell me something, Henry. Do you like me better with my skirt on, or would you prefer I slide it off and show you the rest?”

 “Well, now, you have me intrigued. So, of course, I’d say off.”

 “But isn’t it so awful of me to take my clothes off for your viewing pleasure?”

 “No, but you are evil.”

 “And you’re a nasty boy. Under that suit and that cute smile, you’re a raunchy bastard who loves getting his cock wet whenever he can. I’ve seen how easily you get hard. How all I have to do is bend over and slide this skirt off,” you acted out the narration, looking back to make sure Henry was watching. “And by the time I’m out of it, that dick will be hard.”

 “To be honest, I was the second you started undoing your blouse.”

 “See? You’re just as dirty as anyone else. Maybe even a bit more. Most guys don’t spring one until they see skin. You get hard just from the thought of me stripping for you.”

 Henry spread his feet farther apart, awaiting more criticism. You feigned leaning over to kiss him and grabbed the TV remote from the side table, leaving Henry’s lips wanting.

 “What are you doing?” He asked.

 “Since you’re such a nasty fuck who likes to go to strip clubs and watch porn, and, being that it’s your birthday weekend, I reckon you deserve a little overstimulation.”

 “Oh, yeah?” Henry watched you flick through a few channels until you found an adult network.

 His eyes lit up, and all the dreamy swagger fell away from him. When you turned around, Henry affixed to the television like a deer in headlights.

 “What’s wrong? I thought you liked porn?” You asked, resuming your slow swaying dance.

 Henry cracked a smile and shook his head, which only intrigued you more. “Nothing. It’s nothing.”

 “It’s something.”

 He sighed as though reminded of a long-time joke and wiped his eyes. “It’s just... Mary still gets the cable bill in her name. So she’s going to see the charge for the porn.”

 “Good,” you said. “Let her see it. And if she gives you shit for it... Tell her how we put it on so we could copy every sex position. Since, you know, it’s your birthday, and you deserve to have that cock treated right.”

 He stared at you with a predatory sheen cutting through the amusement on his face. You had removed all your clothes, and stood before him in lace and mesh, waiting for him to lunge at you like a viper. Henry took hold of your wrist, tugging you closer until you had to climb over his lap, and smothered your mouth while you twisted his tie up in your fist.

 “Fuck me exactly how he fucks her,” you whispered, tossing a nod back at the TV.

 “Right now, he’s practically assaulting her throat. You want me to do that to you?” Henry asked.

 “Make it hurt, daddy.”

 He grabbed the meat of your arm, tugging you onto the couch so he could stand up to undo his belt. Henry looked at the screen behind him and then back at you once you arranged yourself to kneel on the couch cushions. Realizing the position made you too tall to reach his groin, you slithered onto the floor and waited. 

 The bulge in Henry’s slacks elated your eyes, and even more so when his hand dove in to produce said swollen appendage. It sprung out of its hiding spot beneath saxx underwear, coming up like a most welcomed visitor in a sea of wool and cashmere. He took a step closer, pressing you against the sofa until you had no choice but to distend your jaw.

 Henry grasped your chin with one hand while tugging his cock a few times in the other. “Let’s get this straight. I’m hard because the whole time I was made to watch those girls on stage, I wished they were you. Not because there’s a woman on TV getting her face fucked, but because, in my good Christian way of thinking, as you say, I’m picturing my cock down your throat. You’re the only one I want grinding on my dick. Ever. You got that?” Henry waggled the head against your outstretched tongue until you nodded eagerly. “Good. Now, open up wide. You know Daddy has a big one.”

 The perverse choking sounds playing over the speakers faded into nothing but background noise when Henry dipped his cock halfway into your mouth. He didn’t follow along with the film, as he was far too enraptured in stroking your face as you took him to the back of your throat. Henry was right; his manhood required substantial room to accommodate, and at a tilted angle, he slipped past your uvula and blocked your windpipe. But when he came away with his shaft frothy with saliva, his concern for your comfort faded fast.

 “Are you sure you weren’t a porn star before we met? You look so good taking a big fat cock in your mouth.”

 “I’ll be your porn star, how about that?” You murmured, lips nipping gently around the tip of his glistening cock. “You can film me doing whatever you want. And you don’t even have to pay me.”

 Henry shuddered. There was only so much he could take before the auditory overload got to him. Between the moaning in the background and the purposely sloppy noises you made sucking his dick, he felt his balls hitch and the lovely burning sensation in his gut fan out of control. He stopped and guided you back to the couch, threw you onto your stomach, grasped your garter straps and hauled your ass into the air.

 “I’ll pay you. Pay you in orgasms,” he said.

 “Just give me that cock,” you wiggled your hips. “That’s all I want.”

 The woman on television rode her partner backward, howling at the ceiling as she went. Your scene was slightly more tasteful and twice as authentic even in your lingerie and Henry with slacks around his thighs. The condo was modern and well-decorated, and you couldn’t help thinking about how a homemade porn movie might look filmed there.

 Henry slammed himself into your wetness and stayed there to enjoy the heat before pulling out and slamming in again. He kept his hands on your hips, only ever trailing away to grope your thighs as he went. A contented sigh spread over your back as he leaned over to wrap you in his arms.

 “Don’t you ever pull a stunt like that again. I don’t care if it’s my birthday. I belong to you, and I have no desire to have my suit dry-cleaned because I can’t get the stripper glitter off it. So I’m going to fuck you hard enough to prove how much I want you, and only you.”

 “I know, Henry,” you whispered.

 Fingers slid through your hair, gripping the strands and tugging your head back while he pumped into you from behind. Your spine absorbed the shocks while you whimpered out loud.

 “No, I don’t think you do. I think you’re a whore, whose only purpose in life is to tease my dick and drive me up the wall. But... You know what?” He asked, standing up on his knees so he could watch his length jamming up your insides. “I love it. I love my nasty whore. I love that as soon as I pull out my cock, you turn into this cum-hungry slut for me. That’s the best gift anyone could get.”

 “Better than ten strippers grinding on your lap for free?” You teased.

 “I’d rather fuck your pussy than have a hundred naked girls dancing on me. Don’t play dumb. You know what this cunt does to me.”

 “Oh, Daddy... You say such dirty things.”

 “It’s all for you, baby.”

[velvetgons]

yedam as your boyfriend;

yedam x reader

word count; 3.6k (ish i think)

requested; yes!! thank you both for requesting 

so i just have this big idea with yedam where he’s got the vibe of like. pining??

i feel like if he liked someone he’d be too nervous to ever tell them so he’d end up having that aesthetic of cute boy in your class that you occasionally catch staring at you but you never really know why

you think ‘eh maybe he’s just zoning out and i happen to be sat in the spot he looks at when he does that :// no big deal’ lowkey you’d wish he was staring at u because he liked u but u just feel that’s unrealistic because omg it’s bang yedam

but no. no. omg does he like you a whole lot.

he’d write you lil dated letters whenever he was having a lot of feelings about anything (example: he’d get stressed out by training and so he’d write you a letter about how he was feeling and how he wished he could be with you to help him feel better, or he’d get some really good news and he’d write you a letter about how happy he was and how he wished he could share that feeling with you)

and they’d go between being like lil notes that just said “dear ___, i’m really stressed and i wish you were here with me.” and being like two double-sided pieces of paper long that included him going off on 40 different tangents

after a while he’d have to start keeping them in a lil box because there’s just so MANY of them and he’s all ‘omg this is the most embarrassing thing i’ve ever done’ as he continues to add more of them to his collection

honestly? he’s not entirely sure why he keeps them because he’s convinced he’ll never ever tell you that he likes you. he thinks maybe he’s doing it so he can look back on it when he’s older and be like ‘wow remember that crazy time!’

and then he starts writing songs about you and then he realises that oopsie maybe this isn’t something he’s gonna just gradually get over

his songs abt you are either so sweet and cute and are like ‘i am: in love’ or they’re ANGSTY and are pretty much just him artistically saying that he thinks you don’t even know he exists

which i mean?? you definitely do. he’s Bang Yedam Himself. you know you’ve had a crush on him since you first got into the same school as him. you just assume he’s way too cool n pretty n smart n talented to ever even realise you exist

your pining level might be a tad bit lower than his to be honest?? you know you like him, you probably doodle his name in the corner of your notebooks with lil love-hearts around them sometimes, you know, to cope. and maybe you’ve daydreamed about him for a vast majority of the time you’re supposed to be focusing in any given class. but it’s all very contained, only you know you do this

but with yedam it’s like. all of his friends know. every single one of them has noticed or been told that yedam is absolutely whipped for someone he’s spoken to about four times

he writes you songs and people who know him ask who they’re all about, and he never knows what to say. he writes you letters almost daily but at the very least weekly, and keeps them hidden away that he would defend with his life if someone tried to read them. he gives you heart eyes in class that your classmates just kinda look at like ‘?? how have they not noticed’

speaking of him getting a chance to talk to you,, he’s so flustered he probably only says a maximum of two sentences

and it’s always his friends who’re like “___! hi! this is my friend, yedam, you remember yedam, right?”

every single time you get a lil bit flustered (but you’re keeping it #well hidden (even if everyone but yedam can gather that you totally like him)) but you say that “yeah!! of course, how could i not?” yedam swears his heart stops beating for a second

tbh, your conversations have never really gotten past that point, which really upsets yedam because he wants to know so much more about you!! he wants to hear you talk about things he’s asking about instead of just hearing bits of your conversation from classes and when he ‘accidentally’ passes you five times in the hallways

and he knows that if he likes you this much from just the things he’s gathered about your personality from this and subtly asking different people about you, then his ‘little’ crush is gonna get so much worse once he actually works up the courage to befriend you

but he’s just so :(( because he doesn’t know how to get to that point with you so he just avoids it altogether and goes about his daily life thinking he’ll have to eventually get over it

then. he’s walking down the hallways one day when everyone’s getting out of class to move to their next one and he sees you with your friends and you look. incredibly distressed

so he swerves to walk a lil bit closer bc his heart just went ‘:( hhhhh’ at the idea of you being upset. and he hears you talking to your friends about how you’ve just been feeling pretty down recently and you can’t manage to cheer yourself up and how it’s really bothering you

and even though yedam can hear your friends actively attempting to comfort you over this he’s still panicked because :(((( he hates the idea of you being upset and feeling like that and he just ?? doesn’t know how he could help you feel better

so when he gets home that day, he writes another one of his usual letters, except he really goes off in this one. it gets pretty long and he ends up, a. confessing his feelings for you, and b. going off about how perfect you are and how you deserve all the happiness in the entire universe

except, he doesn’t sign this one off with his usual, ‘all the love, yedam.’ and instead chooses the anonymous version of this with just, “all the love.”

the next day, he’s gonna rush to school to make sure he gets there nice and early, and he drops it into your locker and would probably literally run away

so you’d open your locker when you got to school and you’re all ‘??!! wowie’ when a piece of a paper with your name written in cute lil handwriting on is right there

and you’d open it and read it right there, but then you’d get a lil embarrassed because now you’re blushing and maybe your eyes are watering a little bit too

you know, obviously, that it’s like omg secret admirer!! because there’s no name saying who it’s from. but you really wanna know!! you’re all soft for them already and you don’t even know who it is yet!!  

yedam, who has been very inconspicuously pacing the hallway near your locker until you got there and read it is like aha!! mission achieved they’re smiling and they look happy!!

and so, much to your surprise, this becomes a daily occurrence. you get to school, open your locker, and there’s always another lil note, sometimes a whole letter!! and they’d be so sweet and cute and he’d probably write one where he’d be like “is this weird?? i get so nervous about making you uncomfortable sometimes :///” and you’d be like? well how am i supposed to tell them that it’s not at all weird if i can’t respond to them

so, in a lil bit of a risk, you write them a letter back, and you leave it hanging out of your locker just enough for it to be visible if someone was in front of it. and you don’t know who to address it to, so you just write, in the tiniest handwriting possible, ‘all the love,’ on the edge so they’d know it was for them

and when yedam goes to leave you another note he sees and he’s like xovofeiv so he takes it and reads and he swears he’s having a real heart-attack this time

the letter would really just be you saying, “this whole pining, slow-burn thing is real romantic and all but i wanna know who you are :/// i think i really like you too and if you’ve liked me for this long you should totally just tell me!!”

so yedam scraps the note he was gonna leave you, and instead gathers every single ounce of courage he has inside of him to write a really messy one that just says, “ok so this is gonna sound really weird but trust me!! can i have your address? i have a gift for you”

n you find it so you’re like ‘ok…..hm….ok well let’s just do it and hope for the best’ so you leave them another lil note with your address on and then head on home at the end of the day

and you’re pacing around your room wondering if you should take a sneak glance but then you think they’re gonna tell you who they are whenever they’re ready so :// you should just wait

so yedam just gets the box of letters from his house. and leaves it by your front door. he knocks and then literally sprints away.

and so you open your door to see this box?? and it’s got a lil note on the top that says your name and has his classic ‘all the love’ written on the top so you’re like ‘????!!!!! ok we’re doing this huh’

so you take it inside and go to your room and get yourself comfortable for this experience. and, oh my god?? you read every single one of those letters, and you realise the dates go back for ages, and they’re all signed off from yedam. by the time you’re done tbh you’d probably be crying because he’s just so lovely. and you’re literally getting to see different emotions and events in his life all at the same time that he’s expressing this Big Love for you and you’re just like. ok. this: hurtS  

and so when you go to school the next day you immediately go and find yedam, obviously. and he’s with his friends so you’re like “hi uh yes please may i talk to you :)”

for a second i think yedam would think he’s done something wrong but he’d still agree because!! he wants to know what you’re thinking about it

when you tell him that you’ve actually liked him for a while, too, he’d be so excited but he’d also be a lil bit sceptical,, like he doesn’t want it to feel as if you’re being pressured into liking him back because of it

so you’d show him one of your notebooks with his name doodled on and he’d dsfpvob have a genuine, serious heart-attack like you’d be a tad bit concerned really because he’d visibly react and look so!!! shocked

however, yedam does say that he wants to still do things properly because you deserve so much!! so he’s immediately like “can i take you on a date??? a whole date???”

and so! (after he has discovered a romantic and cute way to do it) he’ll ask to officially be your boyfriend because he has a big soft spot for classic romance things. like. they just. have a very special place in his heart

and hhhhh omg he’s such a great boyfriend??

so empathetic and caring he just has this magicians trick of understanding your emotions on a whole other level

you’re sad?? he can just Tell whether you wanna talk about it or whether you’d rather just be comforted by his actions instead

you’re stressed and tired?? he knows you want your space and he’s completely okay to give it to you

at first i’m not sure if he’d be great at expressing his own feelings though? i just feel he’d struggle to be cohesive and exact about it instead of getting upset

but if you sat him down to explain that it’s okay to not know how he feels all the time, and it’s even better if he wants to consistently talk about what he’s thinking and how things make him feel, he’d be so, so grateful

keeping to his new-found aesthetic, he’d keep writing you little notes and he’d write you long-ass letters on special occasions

he’s also just super chilled out in general when it comes to your relationship? he knows that it depends on both of yours respect and effort for one another and he also knows he has plenty of both for you so he’s not really concerned

might have some issues with getting jealous at first but just because he’s actually pretty insecure when it comes to you. he’d have the belief for quite a while that you could do better and eventually you would just find someone better than him

and he’d really try and express this to you (even if it made him emotional) so you wouldn’t think being jealous was a big part of his personality

but he really would work so hard on bettering that aspect of himself!! he’d make sure to communicate with you what was bothering him so you could either go through it and help him rationalise it or if it seemed like a legitimate concern then you’d talk about what the both of you could do to change it

and i mean he’s all for doing that when you get jealous too but honestly it’s so clear to you now that he is, a. not the type to ever do something to break your trust and b. ?? so, so in love with you

however! once he got over his insecurities, he would really rarely ever get jealous lol

as soon as he learns to understand that it’s him!! you love him!! and even better, you love him because he’s himself!! what a concept

but yeah as soon as he learns that he’s just so unbothered by the things that used to make him nervous or worried

i mean someone could literally flirt with you in front of him now and he’s just like “:) lol anyway” because he gets it now,,,

i also don’t think he’d be an overly protective type? he’s just concerned about how you’re feeling in every situation so he’ll check in with you when you’re out together and stuff but overall he’s quite a big believer in letting you solve your own problems

and that’s not to say he’s dismissive because if you came to him with an issue and wanted his help then he seriously wouldn’t hesitate to give you advice/do what he could to help

but if you didn’t come to him, he’s gonna try and let you work out for yourself because he knows you can do it !! and he doesn’t want you to feel at all like you’re being underestimated by him

yedam’s 100% the type to do the lil shoulder nudge thing to get your attention and then lean in to give you the teeniest tiniest cheek kiss before he’d mumble a lil, “you okay?” when you were out in public together

yedam is just That Boyfriend too!

he loves the idea of wearing matching clothes!! he’d get matching shirts and colour-coordinate with you before you’d go out to make sure it was a Cute Look even if it was just a matching print jumper and black jeans

traces lil circles and love-hearts on your hand with his thumb when you’re holding hands with him in public and in private

in private though, he’d routinely kiss your knuckles if you were holding his hand because oh boy!! he hasn’t reminded you that he’s thinking abt you in a couple minutes he doesn’t want you to forget

takes candid pictures of you ((does yedam have a phone yet sodfbdi)) and has a folder of them in his phone that he looks at when he misses you

has a picture of you as his lock-screen too

all of your friends are like ‘??? where tf did you find him??? he’s so Good???’

and tbh you honestly don’t know. like. he’s like ridiculously perfect in a relationship. you feel like something bad was gonna have to happen because it just doesn’t feel like he can be real

if you ever wore his clothes, he’d freak out so much because !!! wow that’s his baby!! and he’d think you looked so cute. he’d like ‘wowie picture time :,)’

ok and full offence his favourite types of kisses ever are forehead kisses. you have like fifty (50) forehead kisses every hour because you do anything and his first reaction is “you know what you deserve for that? a kiss!”

but he’d be too shy to initiate kissing you on the Lips for quite a while lol

even after you’ve had your first kiss he’d be a little nervous about because it still makes him blush afterwards

so forehead kisses are an easy alternative ((even if you’re taller than him. he’s not afraid to lean up to kiss your forehead. he’s a bad bitch.))

also for a while after your first kiss (which again, he’d make romantic and extra) he’d always ask before kissing you like that because he doesn’t wanna make you uncomfortable with him

and. tbh. arguments with yedam just seem literally impossible to picture? the boy is so fuckign nice and sweet and considerate that he’d struggle to argue with you….

i mean when he gets in bad moods it’s mostly because he’s tired or stressed and he’s already gone off in length about how wants to be with you when he feels like that so he just seeks you out to be like ‘it’s your favourite boy and he’s in need of Affection :-///’

and he doesn’t really get angry,,,, he gets frustrated but you can never really make him angry and + why would you try to, u know

if you snap at him, it just upsets him because he’ll think he’s annoyed you or done something wrong, he isn’t gonna argue with you about it

he honestly just hates, hates, hates arguments and tries so hard to avoid them at all costs, even if he’d end up not voicing something because he’d be worried it would cause you to get angry with him

you’d notice this though!! and always try to remind him that he has to tell you things and if he communicates it with you like he always does you’re not gonna be angry with him over it!!

and, like everything else, he works? and puts serious, genuine effort into making sure he does this.

after dating him for a while, he’d probably notice little behaviours like his own more ‘negative’ ones in you sometimes and he’d talk to you about them to so you could work on them!!!

everyone around would think your relationship when you first started dating was impressive, but it just…keeps improving…it never stops getting better….

yedam also really loves just Talking about everything with you. he likes to know about what you’re thinking and what your future plans are. he likes to know about weirder things too like what your opinions on aliens and ghosts are. he just loves to sit, be really comfortable, have soft music playing, and ask you about every single thing he can think of

i think a relationship with yedam would just very quickly turn into something you could tell was never going to hurt you?

like. sure. maybe some time in the future you and yedam could break-up. you don’t want that but you understand that it happens. but you can just tell that you’re never going to regret being with him you know?

you’d probably mention that to yedam at first and i mean, he’d be glad that you knew he was never gonna be a heartbreaker for you. but he’s also :( because he doesn’t want you to ever believe that you two weren’t In It To Win ItTM

tbh you really couldn’t picture ever having a reason to break-up with yedam either because?? you just never seem to be able to get bored with him, and you ((to be honest, if you’re honest)) feel like you’re falling a bit more in love w him every day

n he’s really just your biggest fan. he just adores you so much in everything he does.

you two are attached at the hip!! if you don’t particularly want there to be time when he gives you your space then omg you’re gonna be with him pretty much 24/7

yedam, as secretly as it is, loves having his hair played with and loves playing with your hair

he tries to do something cute w it sometimes but usually he just plaits different sections together or just runs his fingers through it really

also, yedam, cuddling enthusiast, remains the almost completely consistent little spoon

he is babey!! he loves being curled up next to you and feeling all warm n safe!! especially adores when he gets to wrap himself up in a blanket and be cuddled by you bc he feels like he’s on a cloud :,((

side note: if you give him nose kisses while he does this. he’ll just combust. he genuinely cannot handle the Feelings.

the only time he isn’t a little spoon is when you two are like. lazily cuddling when watching tv. he’ll just have his arm draped around you so you can have your face smooshed against his chest

also, don’t test him. if you’re sprawled across the sofa and he wants a cuddle and you won’t move. he’ll just lay on you. what r u gonna do about it other than move so he’s the little spoon again? nothing!

i think. i should stop here before i Go Off too much about what dating yedam would be like so hmmm

to summarise, i think any relationship with him would really just be the purest softest most healing experience there is?

and it’s so detached from reality too because he’s genuinely just such a good person,,, no one understands how he’s just so pure,,, and too good for this whole world,,, pls treat this boy Right it’s all he deserves

[nightcoremoon]

tw death cw death trigger warning death etc

let's look at some statistics.

(don't worry, I'll do the math.)

in 2015 there were 320.64 million people in america. 2.71 million died. 0.84% of the total population of people died that year. to match 2016's total population it would need to rise by 2.3 million, meaning 5 million babies were born (or people who immigrated).

in 2016, 322.94 lived here. 2.74 died. 0.85%. 4.75 were born.

2017, 324.99 alive, 2.81 died. 0.86%. 4.5 born.

2018, 326.69, 2.84 dead, 0.87%, 4.4 born.

2019, 328.24, 2.85 dead, 0.87%, 4.5 born.

and in 2020, 329.88 lived. the population slowly increased, the death rate slowly increased which makes sense exponentially, and the birth rate was pretty standard. it's fine.

but... this is sobering.

out of 329.88 million people, 3.36 million died. that's 1.02%. that's a jump by 0.15%, which when you realize that's 494,000 people...

usually it's been so far that the number of people who died each year increased an average of less than 0.01% aka 33,000.

461,000 extra people died in 2020.

but that's just the beginning.

691,000 people died from heart disease which happens every year because people die from being old (or 400 pounds overweight and I do mean that literally) and their hearts give out. but you know what, if less than 700K people die and over 4 million people are born that's totally fine. people gotta die, it's a fact of life.

600,000 people died from cancer. fuck cancer.

192,000 people died from accidents. oopsie.

160,000 people died from strokes. if your heart is stronger than your brain then you're probably gonna die by one of these. it sucks but again old people gotta die somehow.

151,000 people died from their lungs. smoking does that. it sucks but it makes sense. it's easy to die from any of your major organs failing.

133,000 people died from alzheimers which is, again, something that afflicts mostly the old. it's a shame really because of how much of a cruel fate it is to slowly lose your memories instead of just passing away all at once if your heart just decided to stop beating while you slept.

100,000 people died from pharmaceutical companies hoarding insulin for money like the greedy corporate fucking morality-whores they are diabetes. unfortunate. mostly preventable. insulin should be free, fuck you if you disagree.

53,000 people died from pneumonia and the flu. so you know what if you think that it's a valid talking point to say "nobody gets the flu anymore" you're a goddamn idiot so shut the fuck up you stupid cunts.

nearly the same amount died from kidneys.

and 44,000 people killed themselves. sad. although I'm surprised as hell that the number of reported suicides went DOWN??? during pandemic? which seems contrarian but hey it's good news.

now, I'm gonna take a brief segue to point out that cancer stayed at the same number and this probably shows something nefarious about cancer research and big pharma because it stayed scarily static and I might put on a tinfoil hat and say it's because I think the government might be infecting the population with cancer in order to get more money from people through cancer research as a big money laundering op to finance their underground secret wars and the black market because that's something they would totally do. but that's unimportant.

also, heart disease noticeably increased over the years but like, as time goes on and the population increases more age demographics get larger and older so that makes sense. stroke, alzheimer's, kidney disease, them too. but what's REALLY WEIRD is just how many accidents increased exponentially. I can't just attribute it to dumbasses with gender reveal parties and dumbfuck republicans having huge fuckass fires, something nefarious is going on.

and one last thing... look. gun violence is bad. mass shootings, gang warfare, cops, they're out of control. and they mostly target children, people of color and/or religious minorities, and the lower class, homeless, impoverished, etc. it's not as bad as the left makes it out to be in terms of pure numbers but it's worse than the right makes it out to be in terms of statistical analysis and common sense. more people die by their own hands than by guns. just like the war on drugs is a colossal fucking waste of time and taxpayer money, a gun ban would be an expensive waste of time, and if you are out here advocating for BANS then you're a moron who doesn't understand basic fucking civics and is doomed to never operate a successful government and probably shouldn't even vote, because all we need is treating them the same way we treat cars, this is a perfectly reasonable compromise between the "ban everything we find even slightly morally questionable and yet ignore why that's a fucking stupid mentality so says every single queer who's ever been victim to religious based oppression" left, and the "we hate black people but not as much as we love our rooty tooty point n shooty and we will never accept any bill that limits military expenditures because GUN GUNS GUNS YEEHAW" right, because you have to appeal to the majority in a democracy and if you don't like that then fine go ahead and wave your pastel hammer/sickle because you've already given up your rights as a voting american and you live in this system so you have to abide by it unless you're willing to get your hands dirty and actually get off your ass and do some direct action and pipe bomb tesla microsoft apple sony disney or any other actively harmful corporation. didn't mean to go on this tangent but oh well. the highest stats I could find say that less than 15K people died at max in 2015 and honestly given that in the past 20 years it's been between 10 and 15K yearly I gotta say that 30 per day is really not that high and the best way to prevent these is control & reform & prevention strategies and not waste the government's time because they can barely pave the roads (AND CAR ACCIDENTS KILL SO MANY MORE PEOPLE). anyway this is one of the dumbest hills to die on and it's not that high a number and every single person who wastes all their time arguing about guns and ignoring diabetes and cops and suicide, the much more important issues in our society (defunding the police and putting that money into free insulin and mental health care will save more lives than the piggies ever will), is a moron who's missing the big picture.

now back to my original point

345,000 PEOPLE DIED FROM COVID.

THIS IS INDISPUTABLE.

WEAR A MASK, DIPSHITS.

OR I WILL COUGH ON YOU ON SIGHT.

and stop calling it a hoax. you look like an idiot.

and either pay fast food workers more or stop filling the mcdonald's line three blocks every friday night because you're too stupid and lazy to cook real food and NOT scream at a 15 year old because they didn't give your disgusting cheeseburger 16 pickles or they gave you 5 instead of 6 mcchickens or fucked something else up because you suck shit at speaking clearly and ordering politely, dumbass karen. pick one, you ungrateful fucking assholes.

rant over.