#i went back and forth on this decision for a few days and figured that just sharing posts with extensive lists of vetted fundraisers was a-

[fallinglikemagic]

Okay, I've gone back and forth on this a bit but I think I've made a decision and I wanted to properly make a statement on it real quick - I'm not going to be responding to any asks I get asking me to boost fundraiser/donation posts. I've gotten a few from people in Palestine as of late, but this does also apply to fundraisers for other matters as well.

The reason for this is that I am very gullible and bad at telling when somebody is lying or unreliable, and I tend to take things at face value. I don't trust myself not to fall for a scam, and while I might be willing to take that risk on my main blog that only has like 30 active followers (still undecided on that one honestly), I'm not willing to take that risk on this blog where I have a much larger following.

WITH THAT BEING SAID, I am happy to share any masterposts or lists of fundraisers that have been 100% vetted and confirmed to be real by a reliable source. Feel free to put some in my inbox or the replies/reblogs on this post if y'all want, I'll gladly reblog them :)

EDIT: Going to pin this post and add some links at the bottom to some of the biggest masterposts of fundraisers and other ways people can help. Feel free to send me any posts that I should add here.

Vetted Evacuation Fundraisers List

Daily Click To Help Palestine (arab.org)

Gazafunds.com

Operation Olive Branch

RWBY Gotcha4Gaza Donor Sign-Ups

[writingwithciara]

worth the wait ~matt sturniolo~

summary: 5 times matt wanted to tell his best friend he loved her + the 1 time he actually went through with it

word count: 3.8k

pairing: matt sturniolo x best friend!reader

notes: i love the 5+1 fics because they are just so cute. and who exudes cuteness more than our very own matthew sturniolo?

masterlist

december 31, 2013/january 1, 2014: the first time he knew & wanted to express it

it was new years eve and mary lou was throwing a party for her friends and family to celebrate the arrival of 2013.

a lot had gone on that year and she figured the best way to unwind would be to have all her closest friends together under one roof.

y/n was best friends with the matt and her parents were close to his own parents so inviting them over was the first thing that crossed marylou's mind.

y/n walked in like she owned the place and went right to matt and chris' bedroom.

"hey guys."

"what's up?" nick was the first one to greet her, as chris and matt were both occupied with a video game.

"remember how on christmas we were discussing the fact that people kiss at midnight on new years? and then we were deciding who we would all kiss when the clock struck 12?"

"of course i remember. what about it though?" chris set his controller down and the boys all looked at y/n.

"you guys were arguing over who wanted to kiss me at midnight but to settle it, i decided on my own."

"okay." matt leaned forward in his bean bag. "so who's it going to be?"

"you'll find out at midnight." she winked and skipped out of the room. the boys just glanced at each other, trying to figure out who she picked.

as midnight slowly approached, the boys were starting to feel sleepy. y/n had decided on kissing chris at midnight but when she looked over at him, he was passed out on the couch so she shook her head and made another decision.

matt noticed nick passed out too so he gently nudged y/n.

"guess that just leaves you." she smiled through a yawn.

"was i your last pick?"

"yeah. sorry."

"no. it's okay. at least i'm getting picked." he shrugged nonchalantly.

y/n just looked at him and smiled when she heard the adults start counting. "you ready?"

"is this going to be your first kiss?" he looked at his lap.

"nope. kissed donnie ryder on the last day of school before the break."

"oh okay." matt glanced over at the tv screen. "2 seconds."

"1" y/n leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on matt's lips. "happy new year, matty."

he was only 10 years old but to him, the kiss meant everything.

by the time y/n's parents were ready to leave, they noticed she was passed out on the couch with the boys. her head resting in chris' lap. mary lou looked down at the kids and smiled.

"you can leave her ere for the night. she'll be alright."

"are you sure?" y/n's mom glanced back and forth between her daughter and mary loud.

"of course. i'm sure the kids would all appreciate it in the morning."

"okay. thank you mary lou." y/n's parents smiled and headed home, leaving their child in the care of their best friend.

when the kids woke up in the morning, y/n was on the floor and matt's arm was laying across her face. she carefully moved it off her face and he woke up.

"i'm sorry. didn't mean to wake you." y/n looked at the other 2 who were fast asleep before looking back at matt.

"it's all good." he smiled and stretched. "happy new years, y/n."

"happy new years, matty." she repeated the response from a few hours ago and matt admired her for it.

there was something in the way she called him 'matty' that made him realize that at only 10 years old, he was in love with his best friend.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

august 1, 2016: the second time matt wanted to express his feelings

ever since they kissed on new years, matt couldn't stop thinking about y/n. she occupied every vacant thought he had and it bugged him. she was his best friend and he didn't want to be feeling this way.

at his 13th birthday, his brothers had all their friends over and although he loved nathan's company, he was always looking for y/n. he found her after 5 seconds of searching, which he knew was a little odd.

"happy birthday to my favorite triplet." she whispered as she pulled him into a tight hug.

"your favorite triplet? thought i was your overall favorite."

"well if it wasn't for justin, you would be."

"right. justin." matt looked around the room until his eyes landed on his older brother. y/n had revealed to him just last month that she had harboring a crush on justin for the last 2 years and it bothered matt. he understood that girls sometimes had crushes on older men but why couldn't she have a crush on him instead?

"he's so cute." she stared in justin's direction and matt felt the pit in his stomach begin to form.

"y/n, he's 19. ain't that a little too old for you?"

"maybe. but you can't help who you love."

there it was. the one word he wanted to express to her. the one word he couldn't figure out how to say to her. the only word he struggled with.

"no, you really can't." he looked at her briefly before looking down at his feet. "it's not really love, is it?"

"course not. think it's just a phase really. but i can't help it. we grew up with him always protecting us. it's admirable."

"yeah yeah. whatever." matt threw his hand out, gesturing that the idea was nonsense, causing y/n to roll her eyes playfully.

"it's time for cake." nick appeared, grabbing the two of them and dragging them into the kitchen towards the triplets cakes. each one of them was different but so were the boys so it matched perfectly.

"make a wish." mary lou smiled and pointed the camera at the boys as they each blew out their candles.

"i wished for a lot of candy."

"me too." chris smiled at nick and they both turned towards matt. "what did you wish for?"

matt, ever a believer in superstitions, knew that if he told anyone his wish, it wouldn't come true. he glanced to his right and smiled at y/n. "sorry boys. if i tell you, it won't come true."

his wish was to finally be able to be with y/n in the future. he didn't want to screw that up in any way.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

june 1, 2020: the third time he wanted to tell her but couldn't

"i think i want to start making youtube videos." matt sighed as he flopped down on y/n's bed.

they were almost 17 and neither of them had solid plans for after high school.

"i think that's a wonderful idea, matty." y/n sat up and looked at her friend. "what are you going to make them about?"

"well nick, chris and i were talking the other day and we came to the conclusion that we'll just film videos in the car somewhere and come up with random topics each time. or maybe we could do challenge videos every friday. what sounds better?"

"i like the car video idea. but i also like the idea of watching you guys go through challenges. especially if they're one of those gross food ones or something." y/n giggled at matt's expression.

"think the boys will be up for both?" matt sat up straight and looked at his feet. "what if we fail at this? what am i going to do?"

"matthew bernard, you are incredible. you'll figure life out and if the youtube career doesn't pan out the way you want it to, i'll be here to help you figure out your next step, alright?"

"okay." he looked up at her and smiled. "wanna film with us?"

"i don't think your female fans would appreciate that very much."

"we don't have fans."

"not yet. but you will. and you're going to be the favorite. the girls are going to love you."

"you think so?"

"of course i do." she smiled. "just don't forget me when you're famous."

"i could never forget you, y/n."

right then, matt felt like he could lean forward and kiss her. but he didn't. he restrained himself. instead, he brought up the topic y/n was trying to forget about.

"so, how's your crush on justin going?"

when she giggled and hit him with a pillow, he felt so much love for her. it was insane.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

august 1, 2022: the fourth time he wanted to tell her

the triplets had just turned 19 and they were throwing a party. even though it was just their group of friends, matt was feeling anxious. he didn't like crowds and his eyes roamed the group of people, looking for his favorite pair of eyes. when he couldn't find her, he felt his chest tighten. his grip on the cup he was holding began turning his knuckles white.

"hey, matty. wanna go hang out in your room for a bit? how's that sound?" y/n whispered beside him. he looked down at her and nodded slowly. she grabbed his cup, set it on the counter and guided him back to his bedroom. she passed nick on the way and he nodded in understanding.

when y/n sat matt on his bed, he looked at her and smiled softly.

"thank you." he let out a sigh. y/n sat next to him and wiped the lone tear off his cheek.

"anytime." she smiled in return.

the two of them sat in silence for a few minutes before matt spoke up again.

"i know they're my friends out there but i just...i just..." he couldn't form the right words. y/n placed her hand on his and smiled.

"i get it, matt. you don't have to say anything."

"you don't have to stay in here with me, you know? they're your friends too."

"they may be, but you're my best friend and i feel you need the company more."

"thank you. i really appreciate it." he scooted up the bed until his back was against the headboard. y/n mimicked his actions and rested her head on his shoulder. he placed a kiss to the top of her head and lingered for a few extra seconds.

a few seconds he felt came off as a little more than platonic. but even if y/n noticed, she didn't say a thing. matt knew she was thinking about it though and he knew she didn't bring it up because she didn't want to make him uncomfortable & he couldn't love her more for it.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

february 14, 2023: the fifth time he wanted to tell her but couldn't

valentines day was a day mainly pointed at couples or people who wanted to spend a lot of money to get someone to love them. most of the time, it worked.

but for matt, it didn't.

he spent the past 5 months trying to get over y/n. after the birthday party, he figured that after almost 10 years of being in love with her and not being able to find the courage to tell her, he would just give up and try to focus his love elsewhere.

it resulted in multiple one night stands that never left him feeling as good as y/n did when she was around. he was too far in love with her to forget.

so when valentine's day slowly approached, he devised a plan to tell her how he felt. he bought her favorite flowers and bought her favorite food since she didn't like the traditional chocolate and roses. he also bought her balloons because he knew she liked the way the helium sounded. he knew it was ridiculous to spend money on someone but y/n was worth it to him.

he set everything up in his bedroom and waited for her arrival in the living room.

it was over an hour of waiting before she came through the front door, using the key he gave her.

"i am so sorry i'm late. i know we were supposed to hang out today but work was crazy swamped and my boss asked me to stay after my shift to help clean up the dinner rush."

"it's okay. we're not on any schedule." matt stood up from his spot on the couch and approached her. she smiled at him and let him guide her back to the couch. "you can pick the movie."

"i always pick the movie though. don't you want to pick just this once?"

"no. this is your day. i'm letting you pick. besides, i enjoy it when you pick. it always makes you happy."

"you're the best, matty." she kissed his cheek and rested her head on his shoulder. she pressed play on 'tangled' and even though they had watched the movie together about a hundred times, matt enjoyed it because y/n did. it was her favorite movie and he knew that.

halfway through the movie, the doorbell rang. y/n groaned in protest when matt removed his arm from around her shoulder and stood up.

"it's the food i ordered. be right back." matt ran down the stairs and grabbed the food, handed the driver a $20 tip and went back up to the living room. "happy valentine's day." he set the bag down and y/n opened it.

"you ordered my favorite meal?"

"of course." he smiled and watched as y/n began eating the food. she offered him a bite but he shook his head and she continued eating. when she finished, she looked at matt and he swore he felt his heart skip a beat. she had some sauce on the corner of her mouth and matt thought it was oddly attractive.

"what are you staring at, weirdo?"

"you got a little something right here." he grabbed the napkin and dabbed her lips gently. her eyes briefly closed at the contact and matt took this second to admire her. he slowly pulled the napkin away and stood up quickly.

"you alright?"

"i almost forgot that i set something up in my room for you." he started walking to his room but stopped. "are you staying the night?"

"yeah. i'm too exhausted to drive home and i don't want to bother you for a ride since you already do so much for me." y/n approached him and smiled. "now let's go see what you have set up for me."

when y/n's eyes landed on the balloons, she gasped. then she saw the vase of flowers on matt's beside table & it was like she was in heaven.

she stood there in silence for a little too long so matt grabbed her hand. she was startled but she looked up at him with nothing but adoration in her eyes.

"you are so perfect, matty. and when you do this for a girl for real, she's going to love you endlessly."

he felt like shouting 'this is for real. why can't you see that?' at her, but he didn't. he wanted to tell her he loved her but he had no idea how to prove it.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

march 1 2024: the one time he was finally able to tell her

matt had been silently pining for his best friend for over 10 years and he knew that he needed to face his fears and finally let it out. he wanted to tell chris and ask him for help but he knew that would be a lost cause.

nick was almost no better than chris but he knew that at least with nick, he wouldn't get some bullshit back.

he slowly approached nick's door and knocked. "hey. it's matt. can i ask you for some advice?"

nick opened the door and looked at his brother. "what's up?"

"i need your advice on how to express your feelings for someone."

"just tell y/n how you feel. don't be too grand with the gestures because she hates those. make her favorite meal and jsut tell her everything."

"how do you know who-"

"please, matthew. it's been 10 years. i almost told her for you on her birthday last year but she was pulled away by chris just in time so you're lucky. and if you don't tell her soon, she's going to end up with some loser asshole and she'll be out of our lives forever. you don't want that, do you?"

"absolutely not. i can't let her out of my life." he smiled and went to turn away but a thought went through his mind and he frowned. "what if i tel lher and she freaks out? she'll be out of my life then too."

"she's not going to freak out. she may not like to admit it but she's been in love with you for the last 5 years at least. and before you ask me how i know, i'm attentive. i see things most people don't. but you need to tell her today before you lose her for good."

"why today?"

"she's got a date with simon at 6 and if all goes well, then you'll have lost your chance."

"fuck." he checked his phone and ran down the stairs quickly, throwing in and "i gotta go." on the way down. he grabbed his keys and ran to his car. fearing that he could lose y/n, he felt the car speeding up and when he pulled onto the familiar street, he got nervous and looked at the clock

4:58 pm

he parked in her driveway and knocked on her door. when she answered it, she smiled.

"oh hey matt. what's up?"

"we need to talk." he gently pushed himself past her and went to her kitchen to grab a root beer from the fridge.

"okay. and i repeat. what's up?"

"why didn't you tell me you had a date with simon?"

"what do you mean?"

"nick told me that you had a date with simon tonight. at 6. why didn't you tell me about it?"

"that was last night, matt."

"oh.

"and it wasn't much of a date." she sighed and opened her own bottle of root beer. "it was nice at first but after dinner, we were in his car and he kept putting his hand on my thigh. i told him to quit and he did. at first. but then he kept doing it and each time, his hand went further up." matt watched as y/n's sighed. "i freaked out on him and he called me a prude, then left me on the side of the road. so i walked all the way back here."

"why didn't you call me? i would've come to get you, you know that."

"i was embarrassed and i didn't want you to see me like that." she sighed. "i just felt so.... not good enough."

"okay, no. you don't get to feel that way after defending your own rights. it's ridiculous. he should be the one feeling like shit for the way he treated you. and i swear to god. if i ever see him out in public, i'm kicking his ass."

"matt, relax. it's fine now." y/n set her bottle down and put her hand on his arm. "the fact that you're here is enough to make me feel better."

"good." he looked at her. "for the record, you're more than good enough. he was the one who wasn't good enough for you. i don't think there's anyone alive who deserves you. you're too good of a person."

"well i want to find love eventually, matty." she sighed and looked down at her feet. "i don't want to be too good that nobody deserves me. and i have so much love to give but if nobody deserves me, then who am i gonna give it to?"

"give it to me."

"huh?" she looked up with wide eyes, not believing the words she had just heard.

"give your love to me. i know i am far from worthy but i can definitely do better than simon or any other guy in your life. i've built up so much love for you for the past 10 years and not being able to express it has been killing me. you are the single greatest thing in my life and i don't want anyone else to be with you."

"matt, are you serious?"

"100% serious." matt placed his hand gently on the side of her face. "god, i have loved you since i was 10 years old and you were my first kiss. new years day of 2013 was a life changer for me. it awakened love that i didn't think was possibly so young. and when i was going to tell you, you told me you had a crush on justin. not gonna lie, i cried that night. it sucked so bad." he chuckled. "but i've struggled to come up with a good way to tell you how i've been feeling. it sucked having to watch you with other guys for 10 years."

"matt, i love you. so much. your stupid face. your stupid smile. your stupid tattoos. even though none of you is actually stupid." y/n smiled. "i've loved you since your 9th birthday. and on new years when you asked if you were my last pick for the kiss, i lied. you were my first pick but i didn't want to seem too eager. and i also lied about kissing donnie ryder before break. all he did was kiss my cheek and wish me a merry christmas. you were my first real kiss."

"i hated donnie ryder for years because of that." matt chuckled. "but im glad i was your first."

"we may have been 10 but if i recall correctly, you were the best kiss i've ever had. and i've kissed a lot of guys since then."

"okay, i didn't need to know that. i just confessed my love to you and you're telling me there's been many guys as if i didn't know already." matt smirked. "but i do like that i was the best one."

"i think i need a new sample."

"oh is that so?" matt looked down at y/n as she inched closer. "if a new sample is what you want, then it's what you'll get.

he pulled her in and placed his lips on hers gently. she kissed back immediately and when she smirked into the kiss, matt wrapped his arms around her hips and deepened the kiss.

more than 10 years of feelings was being poured out into the kiss and it was the best kiss either of them had ever had.

"since i was your first kiss, can i also be your last?" matt asked in a low whisper as he pulled away slowly.

"yes. absolutely. a thousand times yes." y/n smirked and kissed him again. and again.

they couldn't get enough of each other and their unspoken commitment to each other was all they needed.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

taglist: @worldlxvlys @fearfam69691

[girlokwhatever]

i have an emily idea cooking … ok so they played together at louisville (maybe reader is a year or two younger than em) and dated. they broke up and emily left for the wnba. reader transferred to uconn bc louisville reminded her too much of emily. two years later reader is drafted and ends up on the mystics with emily 🙈

(guys i’m switching up the draft picks a little bit to fit the plot ok i know washington wasn’t second pick)

𖤓✎⋆·˚ ༘ *✧.*ੈ✩‧₊˚ end of beginning,,

part two

emily engstler x fem!ex!reader

“i am happy for you emily, truly i am.”

“then why are you breaking up with me? you don’t know that long distance won’t work.”

tears stream down both of your faces, a consequence of your decision to end things with emily. she committed to the draft that was only days away and was projected to rank very high. she was leaving louisville, which meant she was leaving you and the life you built together.

you weren’t mad at her at all. you really were happy for her and her accomplishments. it was going to break you to watch her leave and not come back, which is why you made the decision you did. selfishly, you needed to focus on your career. you needed to let her go so that the two of you could grow on your own.

“emily..”

“please don’t do this. we can try. i’ll try. please.”

you meant the world to emily, encouraged her to do great things and be a better person. she felt as if she owed the entire past year to you and your motivation that kept her going even through the darkest moments. you’d been a great comfort to her. there would be late nights when nothing else mattered but the feeling of you in her arms. she’d do anything for you.

she’d do anything for you.

“i can’t,”

your voice is barely above a whisper. you’re trying to hold back the sob threatening to spill over. sometimes the best choices were the hardest ones to make.

emily drags her hands down her face and peers over at you. you’re not looking at her anymore, head turned and eyes squeezed shut. she reaches out for you and cups her hand around the side of your face. when you lean into her touch she feels sick, finally letting the reality of having to let you go sink in.

“it’s okay. i get it, i know. i love you.”

she kisses your forehead as she stands, letting her hand drop back down to her side. you relish in the feeling before it’s gone because you know this will probably be the last time you feel it. that same feeling that still gives you butterflies.

“i love you too, em.”

that was two years ago.

you went to watch her get drafted, eyes teary and gleaming as you followed her figure walking to the stage after getting picked forth overall. you cheered and cried for her as if nothing had changed.

a few days after that you entered the transfer portal. everything reminded you too much of her. her name was still plastered on the cubby next to yours in the locker room, her scent still lingered in your sheets, her spot on the couch was left untouched, her absence in the home court was noted heavily.

you ended up signing with uconn. the last two years of your collegiate career were spent there, growing and expanding as not only a player but a person. the friends you made were phenomenal and helped you grieve with the ones you lost.

due to the extra work you were putting into your dream, you grew exponentially in popularity on social media along with your fellow teammate paige bueckers. you were close to everyone on the team, especially her. it led to people shipping the two of you much to your surprise.

you hadn’t dated anyone since emily.

but now it was your turn to be drafted. you committed to the draft alongside your two teammates nika and aaliyah. life was good. after two years of struggling and trying to find yourself, things were finally falling into place.

you’d gotten second overall pick in the first round. the washington mystics selected you and you were beyond grateful for the opportunity. you turned to give your coach a hug, noticing paige and azzi recording in the back with wide smiles on their faces.

it felt like a fever dream honestly. the rest of the night flew by, interviews and interactions seemingly only lasting seconds before you were pulled off to the next person. through the haze, you forgot what would be waiting for you once you arrived in washington.

or who.

emily watched the draft, nervous with anticipation to see where you’d end up. when she heard your name and washington mystics in the same sentence, her heart started pounding in her chest.

she never got over you. it made starting the league hard for her considering she lost her main pillar of love and support. her year with the indiana fever was full of intense moments and anger, always feeling like she wasn’t giving enough and kept having to prove herself.

the next year was even harder. she suffered a rough shoulder injury, leading to countless days of physical therapy and doctor visits. all without you.

to know that she’d see you again in only a short number of days was terrifying. you’d both be in training camp together which lasted weeks, spending day after day seeing each other. though it made her anxious, emily was also excited. she would get to see you again in all your glory, hopefully being able to smile and laugh together like you used to.

emily walked into the mystics gym, setting her bag down and standing to observe the room. there were a few people there already, you being one of them. her eyes immediately found you and your figure, so recognizable to emily.

you seemed to have this glowing aura around you. a smile was plastered on your face as you talked to ariel. you dribbled a basketball between your hands effortlessly, adjusting to the weight and getting used to your new surroundings. your eyes also wandered after you broke away from ariel, finding emily across the room.

you’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss her. two years without her was a major struggle for you. sometimes, late at night, you wondered what it would’ve been like if you had never broken up with her. there were countless times when you regretted your choice. you never considered the fact that you could possibly be teammates again one day. certainly not so soon.

you wandered onto the court, leaving all your aimless thoughts behind. the rest of the trainees gathered with you and started a simple drill where you and a partner would take turns shooting and guarding one another.

by second nature you and emily found each other, shyly muttering a quick, “do you wanna be my partner?”

“yeah, i’d love to.” her heart was pounding at your words, imagining that maybe, just maybe, you missed her too. she smiled at your shyness, finding it ironic how your relationship had devolved.

emily was considerably taller than you, so shooting over her was not easy feat. at some moments you felt like she was letting you drain shots purposefully, even if she swore she wasn’t. you were even able to block a few of her shots, mostly when she kept her feet planted though.

after awhile and a few rotations, the coach offered a different drill. he split the group in two and let you scrimmage, you and emily somehow ending up on the same team.

it was giving you deja vu. anytime you’d get the ball emily was there either setting a screen or opening a path for you. it felt like she never left, like you never split, like you two were still the dynamic duo you were known to be at one point. like she was still your emily.

being here with her made you feel like your old self. the you from louisville, playing with the emily from louisville. in a time where you were both still in love and happy. another version of yourself was here, the best version of yourself.

after hours of sweating and nearly collapsing from being breathless, the day’s training was coming to an end. you drained one more three point shot, finally feeling satisfied with your performance. everyone cheered for you playfully as you collected your bag, quickly heading back to your car. you made it all the way to the parking lot before hearing a voice.

“you did really good today.”

you turned to see emily standing behind you, slightly disheveled and out of breath. she was smiling softly at you the same way she used to. it still made you flutter to this day, especially when you remember all the memories the two of you share.

“thank you, you too! your defense is still so good.”

“thank you,”

you both stood there in silence, not quite ready to break away. being around her offered you some sense of comfort in such an unfamiliar place.

“how’s paige?”

“paige? i mean, she’s good.”

“are you two, like.. together?”

“what- no. we’re just friends.”

emily nods, satisfied at the information. she’s slightly embarrassed for even asking, but she had to know. she had to know if you moved on with someone else.

“so then, is it okay if i take you out to dinner?”

“like, right now?”

“just tonight. you can shower and stuff of course.”

you don’t even have to think about your answer. you’d been wanting a moment like this for over a year. you missed her so much, too much. it was starting to affect you mentally. you’d wonder about her too often, having to fight some of the strongest urges to reach out to her and ask how she was doing.

“yeah, yeah. i’d really like that.”

she’s smiling, allowing it to reach her eyes as she waves you off. she felt like she was home again, even though she was still thousands of miles away. you were here, and that’s all she needed. any moment with you felt so right.

she took the time apart from you to grow as her own person, but now she was ready to grow again with you.

hopefully, you’d be ready too.

𖤓✎⋆·˚ ༘ *✧.*ੈ✩‧₊˚

guys hopefully the song makes sense for this fic

should i make a part two idk?!!?!

also i will spell check this tomorrow.

[meazalykov]

on top of the world

alex morgan x actress!reader

summary: 2019 was the biggest moment in your career, and hers.

2019 is a busy year. endgame, the film you've poured your heart into for the last couple of years, is about to hit theaters, and it’s set to be one of the biggest movies in history. 

the buzz around it is insane—press tours, interviews, red carpets. you’ve barely had time to breathe, but there’s something, or rather, someone, constantly on your mind. alex morgan.

your relationship with alex has always been something special. it's been private, quiet—at least as much as it could be, considering you’re both public figures. her, one of the biggest stars in women’s soccer, and you, one of the biggest actresses in hollywood. 

the rumors about you two have been swirling for months, ever since that time the media caught you at one of her orlando pride games, but you’ve both kept things under wraps. still, it’s getting harder to hide how deeply you care for each other.

alex is about to head to france for the world cup, and you’ve promised yourself you’re not going to miss a single one of her matches, no matter how crazy your schedule gets. she’s been laser-focused on the tournament, and you’ve been equally invested in your work, but that doesn’t stop the late-night texts, the phone calls after her training sessions, the video chats where she shows you around their team hotel.

“are you nervous?” you ask her during one of those late-night video calls, your phone propped up on your pillow as you lay in bed.

“a little,” she admits with a small smile. “but mostly excited. it’s the world cup. we won last time and i have confidence that we will win again.”

“yes! and you’re going to crush it,” you say confidently, leaning in closer to the screen as if that could somehow bring you closer to her. “i know you will.”

“i wish you could be here,” she says, her voice soft, a little wistful.

you feel the same ache in your chest. “me too.”

the group stages kick off, and despite your packed schedule, you make time to watch every game. sometimes, you’re in a hotel room in new york after a bunch of press interviews; other times, you’re sitting on the couch at home, gripping a cup of coffee as the u.s. takes the field. 

your heart races every time alex touches the ball. she’s brilliant—strong, fast, lethal in front of goal. you scream when she scores her first goal of the tournament, jumping off the couch like a little kid, and immediately text her afterward.

“did you see it?” she asks later, when she had a few minutes back in the hotel room before she went to sleep.

“i saw everything,” you reply. “you are incredible. i’m so proud of you.”

you’re glued to the screen through each stage of the tournament. when the u.s. faces france in the quarter-finals, you find yourself on the edge of your seat, heart in your throat. 

it’s a tough game, and alex looks exhausted, but when the final whistle blows and they’ve won, you exhale a breath you didn’t even know you were holding.

then comes the semi-final against england. by now, you’ve memorized every corner of your living room, pacing nervously back and forth. 

it’s a tense match, but when alex scores that iconic goal, raising her hand in that cheeky tea-sipping celebration, you burst out laughing, pride swelling in your chest.

“i can’t believe you did that!” you text her after the game, still grinning.

“had to,” she later replies with a wink emoji. “for the drama.”

the u.s. wins, and with that victory, they’re headed to the final. and that’s when you make your decision. 

no matter how packed your schedule is with the upcoming premiere of endgame, you have to be there for alex. you clear a few days, book a flight to france, and don’t tell her a word about it.

when you land in lyon, your heart is racing. you can hardly believe you’re here, sitting in the stands with alex’s family, her sisters beside you, chatting excitedly about how well she’s been playing. 

the fans around you are buzzing, and a few of them notice you, pointing and whispering. the rumors about you and alex have never stopped, and your presence here only fuels the fire.

“you think she knows you’re here?” her sister, jeni, asks, a smirk playing on her lips.

“nope,” you reply, feeling a thrill run down your spine. “it’s a surprise.”

the stadium is electric. the u.s. faces off against the netherlands, and the stakes couldn’t be higher. you sit on the edge of your seat, fingers crossed, your eyes never leaving alex. 

she’s a warrior on the field, pushing through exhaustion, chasing every ball, and leading her team with that fire you fell in love with. when megan rapinoe scores the first goal from the penalty spot, you leap to your feet, screaming with the crowd. then rose lavelle seals it with a second goal, and that’s it. 

the u.s. are world champions again.

tears prick your eyes as the final whistle blows. you watch alex drop to her knees, overwhelmed, before being swarmed by her teammates. 

the celebration is wild, but you’re still holding your breath, waiting for the moment you’ll finally see her.

and then, there she is, searching the stands, her eyes scanning the crowd. when she spots you, her face lights up like the fourth of july. without hesitation, she runs over, her smile wide and tears of joy glistening in her eyes.

“you’re here,” she breathes, pulling you into a tight embrace, her hands gripping the back of your neck.

you laugh, your heart racing in your chest as you cling to her. “of course i’m here. i wouldn’t miss this for the world.”

she pulls back slightly, her forehead resting against yours, her breath shaky. “you’re supposed to be in l.a. for the premiere.”

“i’ve got a few days,” you say, brushing a stray lock of hair from her face. “you were worth the trip.”

her eyes fill with emotion as she cups your face with both hands, her thumb gently stroking your cheek. “i can’t believe you did this.”

“you’ve done so much for me,” you whisper, your voice thick with emotion. “this was the least i could do. you’re my world, alex.”

“i love you,” she says, her voice barely audible over the roaring crowd.

“i love you too,” you reply, and the kiss you share feels like the perfect ending to the perfect day.

four days later, you’re back in los angeles, decked out in a designer dress for the endgame premiere. the energy is electric, the press is everywhere, and fans are lining the streets, eager for a glimpse of the stars. 

you’ve done the red carpet, given interviews, posed for countless photos with your co-stars. but now, as you wait in the hallway for the theater to open, you’re chatting with scarlett, trying to keep your nerves at bay.

“you nervous?” she asks, grinning as she adjusts the hem of her dress.

“always,” you admit, laughing softly. “no matter how many of these i do, it never gets easier.”

then, you feel it—those familiar hands resting on your shoulders. your heart skips a beat, and you turn around, a huge smile already forming on your face. 

there, standing in front of you, dressed in a sleek black suit, is alex.

“alex?” you gasp, eyes wide with disbelief. “what are you doing here?”

she grins, her eyes sparkling with that familiar mischievous glint. “i couldn’t let you have one of the biggest nights of your life without me. you came to france for me, so i had to be here for you.”

you throw your arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug, the world around you fading away. “you didn’t have to do this.”

“yes, i did,” she says softly, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “you’re my world too, you know.”

you pull back just enough to look into her eyes, your heart swelling with so much love it feels like it might burst. 

“we’re really doing this, huh? the whole “on top of the world” thing.”

alex laughs, nodding. “yeah, we really are.”

and as the theater doors open, the lights flashing and the crowd cheering, you know in your heart that nothing will ever break what you have.

masterlist

[russo-woso]

A New Adventure || Alessia Russo x Pregnant!reader

Request | Masterlist | Prompt list

Summary You and Alessia share the news to your teammates and make them guess which one of you is pregnant

A/N First one shot from the A new Adventure Universe!!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“I can’t believe we’re going to tell them.” Alessia whispered as you sat down in the meeting room.

Today you were 12 weeks pregnant and you and Alessia were ready to tell the girls.

You’d loved having the secret kept between you both. The lingering touches on your bump, Alessia eyeing your stomach. But it was time to share everything with your team.

You’d had your first scan a few days ago and when you returned home, you and Alessia took some photos with the pictures.

You had approached the Arsenal staff, wanting it to be put into the slideshow so you could announce the pregnancy in the meeting.

Alessia’s hand rested on your thigh as you sat, looking at the PowerPoint at Renee spoke about tactics.

As she got to end of it, Renee took a breath before looking at you and Alessia.

You took Alessia’s hand in yours, squeezing it as Renee started speaking.

“There’s one more thing that I’d like to mention. It’s not to do with any upcoming matches but it is something that will affect us as a team.” Renee looked down at the clicker, pressing it to reveal the picture of you and Alessia.

You looked at the team, watching as all their faces turned into big smiles.

Alessia kissed your cheek, thanking everyone as they offered their congratulations.

They all got up to hug you both, your heart swelling with love at how happy they all were for you both.

“So, which one of ye’s pregnant?” Katie asked, all the girls huddling round.

It would’ve been a bit of a stupid question to ask, clearly the pregnant one between you both being which ever one hadn’t been playing but Alessia had picked up a a hamstring injury so she hadn’t played for the past five weeks so it looked like she could be the one pregnant. But on the other hand, you’d been out because you did your ACL, the whole reason why you decided to do IVF because you figured you’d be out for nine months anyway.

“Try guess.” Alessia said, deciding to make it into a game.

“Well, you’ve both been out for weeks. How are we supposed to know?” Kyra pointed out, looking between the two of you.

“Shirts up.” Leah said, you and Alessia lifting up your shirts to reveal your abdomens.

The girls inspected the side profile of your stomach, trying to spot a baby bump.

“This is a lot harder than what I thought.” Leah sighed

“Alessia mentioned she was feeling sick a few weeks ago. Morning sickness?” Beth added, remembering her conversation with Less.

“Y/N had that really weird meal when we went out. Do you remember?” Vic said, the team humming.

“But I saw less talking to the medics and she pointed to her stomach.” Lia spoke up, the girls nodding along.

“This is fun, isn’t it?” You whispered to Alessia, watching the girls go back and forth about the evidence as to who could be pregnant.

“I think I know who it is.” Leah said, the girls pausing and looking at her. “When we went to the pub for team bonding last week, I offered Y/N a drink, and she turned it down, saying that she had an early start the following morning. Less was speaking about how they’d had such a relaxing day the following day so there was no need for Y/N to wake up early. She also hasn’t been drinking coffee for the past few weeks. We all know how much she likes coffee. And… she’s been turning up for physio late, claiming she had a lay in but less manages to get to training on time so surely Alessia would wake her up? But if Y/N’s pregnant, then she’d have morning sickness and not be able to get here on time.”

You and Alessia just smiled as she spoke, the points Leah was making were very valid and were enough to make the team settle that it was you whose pregnant.

“Final decision?” You asked them

“You.” Leah said, pointing directly at you.

“I must say, if ever you have to retire early or something, I’d definitely look into being a detective. Your points were all right.” You tell her, Leah pumping her fist in the air.

“Everyone, you can call me detective Williamson from now on.”

“But what about all the symptoms Alessia had? Were you faking being sick and everything?” Vic questioned

“I genuinely was sick, I think I had a bug. And I was talking to the medics about Y/N and the baby to find out how much exercise she can do.” Alessia explained, wrapping her arm round your waist.

“That explains it all. I’m so happy for you both!” Lia smiled, hugging you both.

“We have a new gunner on our hands now.” Caitlin added

“I’m gonna be the favourite Auntie.” Vic said

“No I am.” Kyra argued

“No, I’m gonna be the favourite auntie.”

“I am, not you lot.”

It went back and forth for ages, you and Alessia just stood there laughing at them all.

This was gonna be a new adventure in your lives, but the best one by far.

[sleepyjuice]

30 maybe with sone angst and hurt/comfort??

warnings: description of a panic attack, mention of abuse, mentions of l*ke maybank

note: i combined these two asks together, hope that’s okay!

“JJ, just talk to me, please, baby.” You pleaded with your boyfriend.

He was a mess, pacing around your bedroom relentlessly, breathing heavy and ragged as he ran his fingers roughly through his hair, then put his hat back on, then took it off again and so on and so forth.

You and JJ had spent the majority of the day together until he had to run home to “handle some business” according to him.

There was nothing you hated more than knowing JJ was in the same room as his father. It made you sick, but you had to respect his decisions when it came to that.

He had only been home for a total of about twenty minutes before he was calling you, the sound of thick wind and the grumble of his dirt bike filling the speaker as he asked, “can I come over?”

Your answer went without saying.

You quickly ushered him to your bedroom once he arrived at your house, sitting him down on the foot of your bed as you sat behind him. But he was restless, immediately standing up and pacing.

That led you to now. You never wanted to push him to talk about his dad unless he brought it up first. It was something he buried so deep inside of him and it was rare that his emotions regarding the matter ever truly rose to the surface.

“God, I just— fuck!” He kicked a shoe that was laying on the floor, quickly looking in your direction to see if he had startled you. He didn’t.

You would let him vent if he decided that’s what he wanted to do, and if he didn’t, that was also okay. After being with JJ as long as you have been, you quickly learned that what he truly needs is just the comfort of his loved ones.

“I know, Jay, I know.” You spoke softly from your spot on the bed, sitting criss cross as you watched him helplessly.

The only semi good thing about this encounter with his dad was that you didn’t notice any new marks or bruises on his skin. It must have just been a conversation that went sour. You were just glad he wasn’t physically hurt again.

“I don’t… Baby, I don’t know what to do when I feel this way. I’m scared.” He panted, kneeling down in front of you now, his hands resting on your thighs, gripping onto them for dear life as if you could slip away at any moment.

“And that’s okay, you’re here and you’re safe, yeah? I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere. I just need you to breathe for me.” You placed your hands on top of his, giving them a gentle squeeze as you began to breathe deeply, hoping he would follow.

His glossy eyes studied yours for a few moments, swallowing hard before clearing his throat and inhaling shakily, trying to match his breathing with yours.

You nodded in encouragement, his tight grip on your thighs loosening ever so slightly as his breathing slowed somewhat, his heart rate slowly falling back to a semi normal rhythm.

“I just can’t— Can’t find the right…words.” He spoke slowly, squeezing his eyes shut as he racked his brain for the words to describe the way he felt. It was as if his heart struggled to communicate with his brain and his brain wouldn’t communicate with his voice. It frustrated him beyond belief and that was a part of why he worked himself up so badly.

“And that’s okay. I know you’re hurting, you don’t need to try and explain if it’s too difficult. It’s just us now, I’m here however you need me to be.” You told him, watching as he took in your words and nodded, slowly standing up before crawling onto your bed and laying his head onto your lap, his arms wrapping around your lower waist.

You could see his shoulders drop, his guard dropping more and more as he allowed himself to feel safe in your presence.

“It’s never been this bad before.” He sighed, his eyes darting up to meet yours.

“What do you mean?”

“The way I feel. My chest hurting and my mind spinning so hard that I don’t feel human, can’t even figure out how to properly speak and tell you how I feel.” He responded, his fingers playing gently with the bottom of your shirt.

“You just did.” You pointed out, wanting him to credit the fact that he was currently doing exactly what he said he couldn’t, explaining why he couldn’t talk about it.

“I guess, yeah.” He breathed, scooting up on the bed and pulling you down so you were laying with him now, his strong arms pulling you into his chest as he held you, keeping you as close as he possibly could.

“Thanks for, y��know.” He whispered quietly, knowing that if you could understand him when he was in the state he was in, you would understand exactly what he was thanking you for.

[mydearlybeloathed]

𝐈 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ¹

𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞...

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you have a decision to make: risk everything for the boy who means everything, or set him free of your doubts.

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: opla!luffy x gn!reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.7k

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: use of Y/N, gn reader, angst, garp ships it

𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬: august, two birds

series masterlist

It took Luffy some time to figure it out, but he’d been in love with you years before it ever rolled off his lips. 

He always knew he loved you, of course. Luffy knew for certain his life would be incomplete without you there by his side, you his first mate, and he your captain.

You were his very best friend, and after the first six times he’d caught you unawares with displays of his affections—heated kisses against the wall of his grandfather’s house were your favorites—you sat him down and discussed what it meant to be lovers. 

He quite liked the sound of being your boyfriend. 

If it were up to Luffy he would have sailed the seas with you forever, if only he could get away from marine training.

He particularly wanted to get you away. You were strong and brave, but you had a dream, and this little town, Grandpa Garp, and your marine father were no good for chasing dreams.

Besides, you smiled less nowadays. Luffy missed your smile like a lost limb.

Especially now, as he sits with you on the sandy beach of your village. You laid between his legs, head resting on his abdomen, his hat on your belly. His arms wrapped around you, and he felt almost fulfilled just like this.

“When we’ve got our own ship,” he said, “there will be a room just for your books. And no one will be able to take them away from you ever again.”

Your heart warmed at the notion, remembering how your father had done just that earlier in the day, prompting this sunset rendezvous on the shore. “And we’ll have a pantry full of all the best foods.”

“And a masthead to be recognized all across the sea,” he went on in a mystified way he only got when talking about the future. 

You laughed and leaned your head back to admire him. “Naturally.”

To you, this was all dreaming and nothing more. A dream so dear to your heart that it was honestly the only thing holding you together at this point—along with his comforting arms wrapped around you, of course. A dream, an ideal, a wish for something more than the path already chosen for you.

You thought Luffy knew that too, or maybe you hoped he knew. Either way, when his arms fled your body and he jumped to his feet, you confusedly flopped back into the sand.

Maybe you didn’t know your life’s greatest love as well as you thought you did, because Luffy’s dream was more than a dream—Luffy would be a pirate, whether you were with him or not.

“Look!” He pointed down the beach as you shuffled to your feet. The setting sun allowed just enough light for you to spy a ship rocking back and forth along the water, beaching itself on the sand. 

From the way it swayed ever so slowly, and the lack of any light or person, the ship seemed to be abandoned. A lonely vessel to brave the seas.

Luffy latched onto your hand with practiced ease and tugged you along down the shore, kicking up sand all the way there. A shriek full laugh escaped you as he halted suddenly, staring up at the little sloop with admiration usually reserved for you. 

“I wonder what happened to the crew,” you mumbled, creeping up the side of it and bringing him along with you. No name was etched along the side, the deck was littered with bird droppings, and the sail had a few stains. The boat was loved by no one, and probably never had been before.

“Dunno,” Luffy said. His hand left yours so he could jump up onto the deck, leaving your palm an uncomfortable cold. 

You crossed your arms as he inspected the ship, coming back to the railing a moment later to grin down at you. You raised a brow at that look on his face. “Well?”

Luffy leaped down beside you, the sand giving under his feet, and he scooped up both your hands in his. A string in your heart stuttered then snapped at the gleam in his eyes, like it already knew the end was near. 

“This is it.” He was out of breath when he said it. “Our chance.”

You laughed mirthlessly through your answer. “What?”

He tugged on your arms, pulling you to hop onto the boat with him. “We’ll sail out at dawn. What should we call it?” You gaped a moment as he shook it off. “We’ll name it later. Look! Just enough room for your books and some food. It’s perfect.”

You ripped your hand away from his, crossing your arms over your chest and taking a slight step away from him. Terror creeped under your skin. “Luffy, what’re you talking about?”

He looked at you like you were the crazy one. “Our dream.”

His dream, you thought but didn't say. “You can’t be serious, Luffy.”

“I’ve never been serious about anything,” he mused, approaching you to cup your face in his hands so gently, like he was holding his whole world. “But this I’m serious about.”

“Luffy…” Slowly, your hands drifted over his own, taking them away from your face to hold them between you. “But… we can’t survive on our own.”

“We won’t be on our own. We’ll have each other.” If that wasn’t more salt in the wound.

Panic flooded your senses. If he left, you had no one. Surely, he would never leave you. “Yeah, but—but we can’t leave tomorrow. Look at this thing, there’s no way it’ll last a storm out there.”

Luffy pursed his lips, thinking, nodding. “Give me a week. I’ll have everything done by next week.” The wonder left him for a split moment. “We have to leave before next week.”

You gradually caught on. “We start as cadets next week, Luffy.”

“Exactly. We won’t be able to get away after that. This is our chance.”

You couldn’t bring yourself to return his smile, certain your face betrayed your intense reservations. You stepped away from him and turned your back, going to the edge of the little ship. “This is crazy.”

Luffy watched your shoulders shake. He watched you walk away from him, and felt something fragile slip between his fingers. He stepped up beside you, grazing his shoulder against yours. “What’s wrong? Isn’t this… isn’t this what we always wanted.”

The silence to follow was everlasting, and it let you think.

Somewhere inside you, you’d always feared this day would come. When Luffy outgrew the satisfaction of dreaming and truly set out to make it all true. He could do it too. You knew that if nothing else. Luffy was everything you had ever wanted, but his desires stretched beyond just you.

Was it unfair to wish to trap him here with you? Was it terrible to wish his dreams would die for the sake of never leaving you? You reacted to the thoughts, flinching at their truth. 

Yes. It was evil of you. Terrible and evil. A tear slid down your cheek. 

The wood of the boat burned beneath your bare feet. The chill night air froze your skin. Luffy’s shoulder was a brand he didn’t know he’d given you. 

“Luffy,” you whispered. “I… I can’t.”

His confusion was even more crushing than anger could ever be. “But we were just saying…”

“Yeah,” you laughed breathlessly, wiping at your cheek. “We were just saying stuff to make us feel better. That’s what it was to me.”

His hand found your shoulder and forced you to face him. Careful, like he feared you would break, he wiped away the increasing stream of tears. “You know it’s always been more to me.”

“I know.” You leaned into his touch. “I’m sorry. I’m…”

“Afraid?” You nodded into his palm, sniffling. “Of your father?”

Were you really so transparent? “Among other things. It’s just… we can’t leave.”

“Who says so?” Luffy left your side and spun around, gesturing to the little ship. “Once we’re out there, nothing can stop us. We’ll be free. Just like Shanks.”

You’d always held a grudge against Shanks. He was dangerous in your eyes, not for any other reason than the spirit he inspired in Luffy. The red haired pirate was kind and just and brave—and you had admired him as much as Luffy in your youth—but he threatened this peace you’d made. Luffy would leave this little island in his name, and that made you hate Shanks.

Luffy’s smile found you again, never relenting in its passion. He raced up to you and held you by your arms, shaking you slightly. You had no choice but to look right into his eyes. “Let’s leave. Nothing’s stopping us. Let’s go the night before we’re trapped forever.”

Sniffling, your eyes skimmed all over his face. There was really only one answer, in the end, as much as it killed you. “Okay.”

Luffy planted a burning kiss to your forehead, then your cheeks, then your lips, drawing you in as yet another tear traced your face. Breaking away, you hugged him with the ferocity of a person who knew it was their last. 

“We’ll start preparing the ship tomorrow. Then we’re free. Captain Luffy and his first mate, Y/N.”

જ⁀➴

All week you helped Luffy load supplies into the sloop, hidden away in the cove, out of sight from those who would thwart you.

From crates of food to medical supplies you convinced him he needed, to the minor repairs the sloop needed, everything was ready by the deadline Luffy had set. 

“Not yet,” he said through a grin, confusing you. “We need your books.”

You’d gathered the most important ones. The ones you used to read to him on particularly boring nights. Stories of grandeur he’d always promised to take you on one day. Books that held sentiment from over the years, that made him pause when he saw one and remind you of memories held close to your heart.

“Remember this one?” he asked, holding it up and flipping through the pages.

Of course you did. “Yeah. It’s my favorite.”

Luffy laughed and showed you the pages, as if you needed reminding of the memorized little drawings the two of you had scribbled into the margins. Yours were better by far, but you much preferred his little stick figures. Then he turned to the little messages he’d written you, and you’d written him, scrawled onto the pages when you were meant to be studying.

“The Two Birds,” he remembered, starting to read the pages. “It was my favorite too. Two birds of a feather say that they’re always going to stay together.”

Your heart thundered in your chest the longer that book lay open. “But one’s never going to let go of that wire.”

“He says that he will, but he’s just a liar.”

You hated that damn book.

Then came the morning of Luffy’s departure. He woke up before the sun, racing to your house and poking on the window. No one ever came to open it, so he gave it a push, swinging it open to find you were absent from the little room.

Not thinking anything of it, he headed down to the cove, deciding you must be there already.

Only, you weren’t. He looked all around the sloop and up on the deck, but aside from the crate of your books, there was no sign of you. 

“Luffy!” A voice bellowed from up the shore, and Luffy’s head snapped up as horror rushed up his spine. Vice Admiral Garp was racing toward him, tripping down the sandy slope.

Jumping to action, Luffy started pushing on the hull of the sloop, using all his might to get it into the water. Garp wasn’t making good time, his feet sinking into the sand and getting stuck every other step. 

The sloop got free of the beach and Luffy shoved off, chest heaving from exertion and panic, head swimming. He kept pushing and pushing till it was deep enough and he pulled himself onto the deck. 

“Hey!” Luffy whirled around just as you leaped at his grandfather, dragging him down to the sand with you. Holding the man down you looked up at him, and Luffy swore his heart dropped. “Go, Luffy!”

You had never intended on joining him, he realized, jaw setting as he spurred into motion, guiding the ship deeper and deeper into the sea, till he was too far away for Garp to catch. He kept going and going till he was just a speck on the horizon.

And with a throat burning with unspent tears, arm tight in the grip of the Vice Admiral, eyes locked on the sea, you found it in yourself to smile. 

Luffy would never have left you, you knew. He was too good. But, gods, he needed to leave. Your thoughts may be evil but you are not. To trap him would be to kill the light in him you so loved. It was better this way, for everyone involved, probably. 

“Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” Garp growled down at you.

“Yeah,” you murmured. “He’s free now.” The smile faded to make way for a sour frown that would grace your face for decades to come. “I’m ready to join the marines, Vice Admiral.”

His hold on your arm loosened enough for you to lead the way back to town, head ducked, and Garp watched you go. A puzzled crease was in his brow, and something in him admired you. Something in him decided you’d make an honorable marine, even if his grandson would not. 

જ⁀➴

Garp never told your father you’d played a part in Luffy’s departure, and you never paid a too hefty price. He figured cadet training without your best friend was enough punishment. And he had been right on all accounts; you made an excellent marine, one of the coldest and most efficient of your time.

Your superiors commended you. Your peers envied you. As for yourself, well, it was hard to stave off the self loathing. You missed Luffy, but this was all for the best.

He was free, and honestly, that was as good as freedom itself.

Some months later, you were sitting at a desk going over the files of recent prisoners, when a new wanted poster was slapped onto the table. You jumped, glancing up at Vice Admiral Garp, who wore a strange kind of grin on his face.

“Take a look at your boy,” he said, walking off not a second later.

Glancing down, you spilled your ink with how badly you spooked, practically throwing everything aside to pick up the poster. A watery laugh slipped past your lips as you cupped a hand over your mouth, eyes suddenly teary. He’d done it. Luffy was a pirate with one of the highest bounties you’d seen. 

“Care to go after him?” Garp wondered from the doorway. “We need our best on this crew. They’re a dangerous bunch.”

You looked away from the poster of a face you hoped to never see again. You’re not sure what you’d do if you saw him again. “I don’t think I should.”

“Why?” He settled you with a glare. “You’re one of the most promising soldiers I’ve seen. But you’re losing your edge. Perhaps some action away from the desk will bring it back.”

You started to shake your head. “Vice Admiral, I don’t think seeing him would end well for anyone.”

“Perhaps. But you should know he asked about you.” Your eyes widened a fraction.

“You talked to him?”

“And he asked how you’re doing mid fight with me,” he chuckled.

You tried to think about the implications. “He did?” Taking a moment to think, you shook your head. “Respectfully, I decline. I fully believe hell would break loose if he saw me.”

Garp seemed to smile at that, like that’s exactly what he wanted. “Respectfully, I decline your decline. You report to your new post tomorrow.”

Gaping, you chased after him as he stomped down the hall. “But Vice Admiral—Garp! Stop!”

He had the nerve to laugh at your panic, and without thinking you grabbed his sleeve and jerked him to stop. “I’m a coward! That’s why I’m here. I’m not a promising soldier—I’m a dirty coward.”

Garp stared at where your hand held his sleeve, his frown a thin line. “And how do we fix that?” He took hold of your wrist and gripped it tight. “We take you to the source and crush it.” 

His hand found your shoulder. “You chose to stay, cadet. Never forget that.”

Ouch. You nodded swiftly. “I know… Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow,” Garp said through a tight lipped grin.

You gave him one last solid nod and returned to your desk, shoulders stiff and blood rushing in your ears. Your eyes skimmed over the paperwork you had left to finish, all scattered over the floor, some dirtied by spilled ink. Luffy’s wanted poster smiled up at you.

He had always been too good for you, you think, rolling the poster up and slipping it into your coat pocket. Hell would break loose should the Strawhat Pirates cross paths with Cadet L/N, for many, many reasons. Cracking your neck to relieve some stiffness, you considered that may not be such a bad thing.

>>

[byunpum]

I can be a better father | Part 3 (Falling in love)

Pair: Tsu'tey x Grow up y/n x Grow up spider

Warning: none, cute moments.

Note: Here is the third part <3, there were a few requests that were very similar. So I put them all together to make this oneshot. They were literally the same, they just changed a few things. I took the things I liked the most from them. I hope you like it.

Requests: "Here" (Here are screenshots of requests)

Avatar masterlist | Part 1, Part 2 , Part 3

Roxto was excited, after spending the whole day swimming near the reefs. In search of a type of seaweed, which only grew in a specific area. He felt tired, but proud of his work. His basket was full of that special seaweed. He was on his way to your marui. Which was located in the depths of one of the islands.

When jake had to make the decision to leave with his family from the omaticaya clan, he also decided that it was best for tsu'tey and his children to come with them as well. After all, they were his family too. Y/N was still his daughter and he was pretty sure that Quaritch would be behind them. It was difficult to convince tsu'tey, but after much talk and two nights of thought. Tsu'tey agreed, and left with the sully's and their children. It was painful for him, his land, his clan…everything he had to leave. But it was the best for the family, the best for you and spider. Thanks to eywa, ronal and tonowari accepted that everyone stayed, at the beginning it was hard for everyone. And more for you and spider, you were humans living in a new environment. But you all settled in very quickly, and so the years went by. Everyone in the family grew up and matured in the new clan. You were already part of it. Tsu'tey made their new home in the depths of one of the islands. The island was right next to where the large group of maruis were located. He wanted to feel the same as his previous home. So he was lucky to find a place with lots of vegetation.

Roxto moved closer to where your marui was, looking around carefully. Examining who was inside. He didn't want to meet tsu'tey, he was a serious man and looked intimidating. A great warrior. But he was relieved when he saw the small figure of Y/N, walking back and forth in the marui. The boy approached, giving a few hops. "Y/N?!!!" shouts rotxo, coming a little closer. You were setting up at home, cleaning up your place. "Hi…what are you doing here?" you speak, walking over to greet the boy. "I came to bring you something, it's a surprise" rotxo says, sitting down on the floor. You drop one of the baskets, and walk over to where rotxo is sitting. Sitting down next to him, crossing your hands.

"Look…this is for you" says rotxo placing the basket full of seaweed in front of you. Your hands quickly run to your head, screaming a little excitedly. "No…. no way!!!" you are so excited, you had been looking for this type of seaweed, for many months and nothing. "How did you know I was looking for this?" you ask him, looking and touching the seaweed. "I heard you talking to neteyam that you needed this seaweed for a…mmmm a tea" rotxo says, seeing how you were so fascinated. "Thank you…. really thank you so much. Would you like some tea?" you look at rotxo, who had a big smile on his face. "Sure…I'd love some" says rotxo, seeing how you ran up and grabbed the basket.

You had to clean the seaweed, and prepare it. Months ago Ronal had told you and Kiri. About a seaweed, that helped with healing and emotional well being. It could help with some illnesses. You always wanted to find it, but it only grew in certain seasons. Rotxo just sat there, looking carefully at everything around him. Without a doubt, your marui was different from everyone else. He knew that in it, lived you and your father and your brother spider. In some corner he could see a kind of box, which he supposed was the weird box you had once told him that produced the oxygen for you to breathe. On the other side there were many special bows and arrows hanging on the wall. And several hammocks hung, one bigger than the others. Several large baskets, and the area where the food was prepared. Then his gaze went to where you were sitting, preparing tea. You looked so beautiful…you turned a little and gave him a smile. Rotxo changed his look, he was blushing.

After a couple of minutes, you approached him. You were holding cups of tea, "You will like it a lot!!!" you say, you were doing a little dance, while handing him the drink. Roxto accepts the drink, and watches as you sit down next to him again. He sniffs a little of the drink he was holding, and then brings it to his lips. After the first sip, he closes his eyes and enjoys the taste. On the other hand, you were looking at him very attentively. "And? how do you feel? Do you feel different?" you ask him, touching his shoulder. Rotxo's tail, wagging fast, always had that effect on him. He would get nervous, every time he had any kind of contact with you. He is quiet for a moment, looking into your eyes. Making eye contact with you. "So?" you speak, softly. "He's a little… "rotxo tries to move a little. But the moment was interrupted when you both heard a loud noise.

Tsu'tey and spider had come in from fishing, spider dropped the bag. While tsu'tey looked at the young men in front of him. "Hello" says tsu'tey dryly, looking carefully at rotxo. The boy tensed, getting up from the ground. Turning away from you, you settle further into your seat. You already knew the drama scene your father was going to make, rolling your eyes. "Hi dad…look roxto brought us a present" you pick up the basket full of seaweed, showing it to your dad. He laughs a little but reluctantly. The tension can be felt all over the marui, rotxo says goodbye to everyone and quickly leaves the house. "Wait rotxo" you try to stop him, but the boy waves goodbye from afar. "Goodbye rotxo!!!" you raise your voice, but you see how the boy practically runs away you couldn't do anything. You let out a big sigh, as you get up from the ground to go to spider, taking the basket full of fish.

"Did we interrupt something?" asks spider, in a mocking tone. You push your brother a little, as you walk past your father. He had his eyes glued to you. "Yes…I want to know what that boy was doing here? And why were you alone?" asks tsu'tey, you try not to make eye contact with your father. "Rotxo came to bring this seaweed, which I wanted so much. That's all…and I was kind enough to make him some tea. That's all" you speak, while you had already started cleaning the fish. Spider sits next to you helping you prepare dinner. No one else talked about it, tsu'tey knew how to respect his children's decisions. But he was worried about you, if there was one thing you were like your biological father, it was your stubbornness. If you were going to do something, you were going to do it and prove that you were the best.

And so a whole week went by. Tsu'tey knew that something was happening to his girl, she was busier and finished her chores quickly to go to she knows where. That same morning, she left the marui quickly. She said a quick goodbye. "Papa…I'm going to go help neytiri" you speak, taking your things. Tsu'tey gave spider a worried look. "Do you know what's wrong with your sister?" spider just rolls his shoulders up. "No…I don't know anything. Maybe she just wants to spend time with neytiri" spider does his best to sound the least bit disiterested. Spider did know what you were going to do, and where you were going to go. But you had sworn to him not to say anything to anyone. You arrive at the marui, where only jake and neytiri were. "Hello!!!" you speak, you looked so happy.

"Hey honey…what are you doing here so early?" asks Jake. After so many years, you two finally had a good relationship. "I come to ask you a favor…little one" you speak, approaching neytiri's side. Sitting down next to her. "Let's see…what do you want" neytiri gives you a look. You try to contain your laughter, you watch as jake taps you on the knee. "Come on…what's up?" jake speaks. You laugh a little. "Rotxo invited me for a walk…and " you laugh, you were all giggles. "And?" asks neytiri. "You know how dad is…and I really want to go for a walk with him" you speak. "Tsu'tey is right…you shouldn't" jake is interrupted, when neytiri punches him in the arm. "It's okay….go, I promise I won't tell him anything" neytiri says, you get up from the floor and give him a hug. Neytiri laughs, a little and hugs you back.

Neytiri had kept her eyes on you, for all these years. Caring for you and supporting you in every way she could. At times like this, you reminded her so much of her sister. Sylwanin used to sneak out at night to go see tsu'tey. Neytiri had to cover for her, she also remembers that face Y/N had at this time. She had the face of a lover. Neytiri sees how y/n goes to the area where kiri had her clothes. Taking what could fit her, she looked so tender. "I will tell tsu'tey that y/n…" jake is again interrupted by neytiri. "You will say nothing" neytiri orders. Jake throws up his arms, surrendering. After some time, a figure approaches at the edge of the doorway. "Hello," speaks rotxo. You turn quickly, to get up from the ground. "Rotxo!!!" you speak, reaching over to take his hand. This action makes jake look at neytiri, open-mouthed. "Watch out!!!" neytiri says, as you both walk away. You were holding rotxo's hand tightly.

"Where are you going to take me?" you ask rotxo, both of you were walking. You were taking some shells that you could find on the way. While the boy was looking at you with so much admiration. "mmm can we go to the other side of the beach? There the sea is quite calm there" says rotxo, with a calm voice. You reach over and take his hand. "Sounds great to me…and look. These shells are good for some beads" you speak up, rotxo just laughs and approves of your comment. "You've got check-in time, or you're all mine for the rest of the afternoon" rotxo says, teasing you. You nudge him, playing with him. "skxáwng!!! but yes, I can be with you all afternoon" you hug roxto's arm.

"I think we should tell tsu'tey" jake says. "We won't tell him anything" neytiri places her hand on her partner's mouth. Jake could be a bit intense at times. The couple was so caught up in discussing what they shouldn't say, that they didn't notice that tsu'tey had come to their marui. The man stood listening to it all in silence. "Y/N shouldn't go off like that with that boy…if tsu'tey knows," speaks jake. "What do you have to tell me?" asks tsu'tey, making both na'vi turn to look at him. There was an awful silence. "I want you both to tell me where Y/N is" Tsu'tey was getting nervous.

You settled your knees in the sand more, combing out a piece of Rotxo's curly hair. The boy had never been one to put ornaments in his hair, but you had convinced him. You were humming, while he was touching his toes. It was a peaceful moment, you both felt comfortable together. "We should get something to eat," Rotxo says, and you give him a hug behind his back. "What would you like to eat?" you ask him, pouting. "mmm you tell me" rotxo laughs, when you slip a little down the side of his arms. Rotxo brings his hand to the back of your neck, stroking his thumb over your soft skin. "I love you…very much" Rotxo speaks, your eyes widen. "I love you very very much too" you speak, giving rotxo's arm a squeeze. You two had created a very strong bond, you could say romantic. Rotxo was a wonderful guy, always making you feel good. Always worried about you. On the quiet, you had created your own relationship. No one knew…to the public they were just friends. But in private, their relationship was taking giant steps.

In the meantime, two people were watching the young couple. Tsu'tey and neytiri were watching the boys from afar, hidden in the bushes. Tsu'tey felt that his heart wanted to come out, he was experiencing so many emotions together. Her little baby girl, there flirting with a boy. A young metcayina, he felt like he was going to vomit. But he was doing his best to hide it. Meanwhile neytiri, observing the situation, found it curious but adorable. "Is that…why is she there?" says tsu'tey while giving her friend a look. "She's with her friend" says neytiri, looking credulously at tsu'tey. She had to hold back her laughter, because the look on tsu'tey's face this moment was hilarious.

"This scene looks very similar to me," says neytiri. tsu'tey's ears perk up, and he looks at his friend curiously. "What?" asks tsu'tey. "It reminds me so much of how you and Sylwanin were. So silly and in love" says neytiri, tsu'tey pouts. "nonono…but we are talking about my child" says tsu'tey. Neytiri gets up from the floor, giving her friend's shoulder a squeeze. "She has to grow up" neytiri says goodbye and leaves tsu'tey alone spying on his daughter. He turns to look at his daughter, who was sitting next to that boy, laughing. She looked happy. Tsu'tey gives a sigh of surrender, sitting down on the sand. He had to understand that you were growing up, that this had to happen someday. The man stands up, taking another look at the scene. He chuckles to himself…neytiri was right.

[storiesforallfandoms]

play date ~ ryan gosling

word count: 2386

request?: yes!

“hi could i request a ryan gosling x reader”

description: when he goes to pick up his daughter from a play date, he finds himself drawn to the mother of the other girl

pairing: ryan gosling x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist (one, two, three)

Ryan pulled up to a house, double checking the address Eva had given him. It was the day he was supposed to pick up the girls for his week with them, but Eva hadn’t told him that they were over to a friend’s place for a play date. When he showed up on her doorstep, she seemed confused at first, until realization hit her.

“Shit,” she said. “They’re not here, they’re at a friend’s place. I totally forgot you were getting them today and forgot to tell you. Hold on, let me get the address.”

He knew it wasn’t on purpose that Eva let the girls go on a play date when he was supposed to be picking them up. He knew she had genuinely forgot what day it was, and didn’t think to tell him before he showed up. Their separation was amicable, and they continued to be friendly for the sake of their daughters. But that didn’t make the back and forth with the girls any harder. He didn’t want them to have to go through this; neither of them did. They fought so hard to make the relationship work, but in the end they had to make the difficult decision.

It was hard to be away from his girls. Ryan and Eva had come up with a schedule where the girls would go back and forth between them on a weekly basis, and specific holidays, but the schedule was often changed when Ryan had to film or do press tours. There were times when he went several weeks without seeing them, which had always been hard on him but, for some reason, it had been a lot harder since the separation.

No, he didn’t want to take the girls from their play date if they weren’t ready to go, but he was excited to finally get to have his time with them again.

He walked up to the front door and knocked. A few moments passed before a young woman opened the door. She seemed shocked to see Ryan on her doorstep, and he hoped he wasn’t about to have a fangirl encounter by the person who was looking after his kids.

“Can I help you?” she asked.

Ryan waited a moment before responding, trying to figure out if this was her genuine reaction or if she was just playing it cool. “I’m here to pick up my daughters.”

“What are their names?”

“What?”

“Your daughters, what are their names?” Ryan told her, but she continued to look at him skeptically. Wait, what? “Do you have some ID on you?”

A scoffed slipped from Ryan’s lips. “Are you serious?”

“Listen, I’m not just letting kids go with any strange man who shows up on my doorstep claiming to be their dad. That’s how kids get kidnapped.”

What she was saying made sense, and Ryan probably would’ve appreciated her extreme caution with his kids under different circumstances. But right now he just wanted to see his girls. He opened his mouth to respond, but was cut off by two small voices calling, “Daddy!” before two bodies barreled into him. Any annoyance melted away as he wrapped his arms around the young girls.

“Hey sweethearts,” he said, kissing each of them on the top of their heads. “You guys having a good play date?”

“Yeah!” they both said.

“Are you ready to go home? Let’s go get your things.”

He didn’t wait for the woman to invite him in. She had already stepped aside when the girls had come out, so he simply walked past her without any acknowledgement. The girls raced down the hallway and turned to go down a flight of stairs where the voices of other children could be heard. Ryan waited at the doorway of the porch.

“Sorry for the second degree,” the woman said. “I try to be protective over the children in my care. You never know what kind of sickos are out there.”

“It’s okay. I understand,” Ryan assured her. And it was actually okay. He had come to his senses finally. “Are you, like, an at home daycare?”

“Oh, no. I have a boy around the same age as your girls. I usually host the playdates for all the kids in the same grade. So, maybe I am an at home daycare at this point. My name is (Y/N), by the way.”

“Ryan.”

He shook her hand, waiting for her to connect the dots. He expected to see realization in her eyes, followed by the inevitable freaking out over meeting him. But it didn’t come. She shook his hand with a friendly smile before pulling her hand away. She gestured for him to come inside, so he followed her further into the house. He was feeling very shocked by the fact that this person wasn’t acknowledging his celebrity status, but he also wasn’t about to bring it up. This might be his one chance to feel normal for a few minutes, and he didn’t know her enough to know whether or not he could trust her with his kids after she found out he was famous.

(Y/N) led him to her kitchen and went to the fridge. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“I’m good, thanks.”

She gave him a look. “Those girls aren’t gonna be ready any time soon. You might want to make yourself comfortable.”

Ryan chuckled as he realized that she was right. It had definitely been enough time for the girls to get their things together and be ready to leave. Instead, he heard children giggling from downstairs, which he was sure was the kids playing again.

“Do you do all of this on your own?” Ryan asked as they sat down at (Y/N)’s table. “Being a not daycare?”

(Y/N) chuckled. “Yeah, I do. Sometimes some of the other parents will bring snacks and stuff when they drop their kids off, but no one sticks around to help. Not that I really need it, though. There’s not a lot of kids here usually, and they’re all very well behaved.”

“Your son’s dad doesn’t help out?”

She shook her head. “He’s not in the picture. He hasn’t been for a long time. Ever, really.”

Ryan winced. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m not looking for sympathy or anything. This is how things have been for me since Jake was born. My ex skipped down when I found out I was pregnant, so I got over it long ago.”

Ryan looked down at the glass of water (Y/N) had given him. He suddenly felt guilty for his feelings about his separation from Eva earlier. At least they had committed to remaining civil with one another for the sake of the kids. Even if Ryan didn’t get to see them often due to work, he still made the effort to see the girls and get his time with them. He couldn’t imagine never seeing his daughters, let alone not wanting to see them.

“Hey,” (Y/N) said, snapping Ryan out of his thoughts. “Stop with the internal pity party. I said I’m over it, and I don’t want sympathy.”

Ryan smiled. “I know, I’m sorry. I was just thinking I can’t imagine not being in my daughters’ lives. They mean the world to me.”

“They’re lucky to have you as their dad.”

A chorus of laughter came from downstairs. Ryan and (Y/N) both looked in the direction it came from, mirrored smiles on their faces. Hearing that his daughters were having such a good time made him not worry about how long he’d be waiting for them to be ready to leave. That and the fact that he was starting to enjoy his time with (Y/N).

“I have to apologize for how I reacted to your questioning earlier,” he said. “I didn’t really expect an interrogation when I came to pick up my daughters.”

She waved off his apology. “I took you by surprise. I can’t blame you for being annoyed. I just thought Eva was the one coming to pick them up, so when you showed up on my doorstep I was a little suspicious.”

“I appreciate you keeping the kids safe, though. At least I know I can feel at ease when they’re here. Eva didn’t tell me they were here until I showed up at her place to pick them up, and I guess neither of us really thought about calling you to let you know I’d be getting them instead of Eva.”

“Wait,” (Y/N) said. “Are you and Eva not together?”

Ryan shook his head. “We split up a few months ago. It’s been tough, but we’re trying to stay as friendly and civil as possible for the sake of the kids.”

(Y/N) looked like she was also deep in thought as he spoke. She nodded, but didn’t reply for a few moments. When she finally did speak, she had decided to change the subject and Ryan happily went along with it.

Time passed but neither of them noticed. They had gotten so deep into their conversation that they didn’t realize how long it had been since Ryan had told the girls to get their stuff together to go. They spent the time getting to know one another. After talking for some time, (Y/N) finally did admit that she knew of both Ryan and Eva’s fame status, but that she didn’t really care all that much.

“I met Eva before I knew she was famous,” she told him. “I only found out afterwards when this old re-run of 2 Fast 2 Furious was on TV and I recognized her. But by that point I knew her as the mother of Jake’s friends and I didn’t care to think of her as a big hot shot actress. Of course, upon looking her up I came to find out that her partner - or I guess ex-partner now - was also an actor.”

“But you didn’t know it was me when I came to the door?” Ryan asked.

“Well I didn’t look up pictures of you or anything, and I haven’t seen a single movie you’re in.”

“Not even The Notebook?”

(Y/N) made fake gagging noise. “Oh, I’m the exact opposite of Nicholas Spark’s demographic. The only one of his movies I’ve seen is that one with Clint Eastwood’s kid, and I only saw it because my best friend was going through a breakup and wanted to watch sappy romantic movies.”

Ryan chuckled. “You have no idea how refreshing this is, but also how relieving it is. It’s hard to find someone to look after your kids without worrying if they’ll run off and tell the press personal things to make a quick buck.”

(Y/N) scrunched up her nose in disgust. “That’s terrible. People are fucking awful.”

Ryan nodded his head in agreement. He didn’t have to be told twice. He had known that since he was a child himself.

Over an hour had passed by the time the two of them heard footsteps running up the stairs again. Ryan’s two girls, along with (Y/N)’s son, Jake, rounded the corner into the kitchen. Jake immediately ran up to his mother and jumped onto her lap. (Y/N) began to laugh as she wrapped her arms around him.

“What do you want?” she asked.

“Nothing!” Jake responded. “I love you, mommy?”

She gave him a skeptical look. “Okay, what do you want?”

“Hot Pockets!”

(Y/N) chuckled and kissed the top of the young boy’s head. “Okay, I’ll put them on.” To Ryan she added, “Do you guys want to stay for dinner? I know Hot Pockets aren’t anything super fancy or gourmet.”

“Can we daddy?” Ryan’s oldest asked.

He noticed then that neither of them had their things still. He smiled at the two of them and agreed, which resulted in loud squealing and repeated declarations of love before the three of them ran back downstairs.

By the time the girls were actually ready to go, they and Ryan were the last ones to leave. The other kids had been picked up hours ago by their parents, but Ryan stuck around as long as the girls wanted to. He was enjoying his time with (Y/N) and didn’t want it to come to an end when he wasn’t sure when or if he would ever see her again.

But the sun had began to set and the girls were starting to get tired, so Ryan knew it was time to go. They finally collected their things, said their goodbyes to Jake and (Y/N), and started for the door.

“Thank you for letting us stay over for so long,” Ryan said to (Y/N) after getting the girls into the car. “We didn’t mean to impose for as long as we did.”

“Oh, it wasn’t an imposition at all,” (Y/N) assured him. “Jake loves the girls, and I enjoyed the company as well.”

They both stood in silence for a few moments. There was so much more Ryan wanted to say, but he just couldn’t get any of it to come out. He wanted to ask if he could see her again, maybe ask her on a date but not be so forward that that was what he was doing. But at the same time, he was almost nervous to do that. He didn’t know for sure if she was single, if she was even interested in him that way, if it was a good idea to try and date the mother of his kids’ friend. But at the same time, he really, really wanted to see her again.

“You should come over some other time,” she said, filling the silence. “Like...with the girls or...maybe without them.”

“Oh,” Ryan said, both shocked and relieved that (Y/N) filled in the gaps for him. “Yeah. I would love to.”

They exchanged phone numbers and said goodnight again, lingering for a while before Ryan finally tore himself away to bring the girls home. They were both already almost asleep when he got into the car. He smiled as he looked at the two of them in his rearview mirror, and smiled more as he noticed (Y/N) watching them from the doorstep.

[nieceeee]

“WHERE TO NOW?”

PS: babydaddy!eren and y/n have been distancing themselves from one another. Eren wants to be with her but feels like her heart is in another place…or with another person. He and the boys discover exactly what’s going on as he is babysitting one night…

A/N: Angst, tension, fluff for the most part. Cussing, mention of the name babydoll. This is really for a 3 part series so don’t worry there will be plenty of lovey doves stuff towards the end if y’all want it. The other parts will be a little bit longer than this one. I had to play with your emotions before playing with your….nevermind. ENJOY!

W/C: 2.4K

PREVIOUS FICS TO READ: She’s Not Yours (its probably best to read the Eren playlist…if you’ve read them all, see if you can find the references from the previous fics in this one)

“You look amazing, baby doll.” His voice said from behind you, sending a chill down your spine. You took a deep breath to shake the nerves before you lifted your eyes and stared through the mirror at his. “Thank you Rennie.” You say with a soft smile. Things between you two had been…decent. Weeks after that very dramatic day that started with a bloody nose and ended with his ex hearing beating down yo block, time had seemed to blur together. Eren, freaking out about the entire situation, went back to try and talk to her, hoping to smooth things over which also led to another breakdown from her and him consoling her. And even though he admits nothing happened, the simple fact that he was there for her was something you couldn’t stand. And that alone had you questioning so many things. I mean you weren’t together and neither were they so why does who he has a connection with bother you so much. He said even though they weren’t dating at the time, he didn't want her to feel disrespected and assume you called her intentionally. You understood the sentiment although you didn't give a damn about what she assumed. But because of that, you were at a stand still not only with Eren but with your own emotions as well.

You both (more you than him) decided it would be best to give each other some time to figure out what you wanted to do when it came to the complications revolving around your relationship. Yes, the feelings were there but there was also a lot of unhealed trauma and damage that each of you needed to figure out. Eren wanted to be with you, he knew that without a doubt. The constant back and forth and the fallout of his other relationship taught him a few things and it was in those moments where he realized that you were the only person for him. His first real love, his best friend, the mother of his child. He couldn’t see himself being with anybody else again.

Unfortunately for him, you had other plans. You needed more time to sort through your feelings. The consistent pestering in your mind of what happened every time you had tried to make it work with him before would always rear its ugly head and you’d have to face the reality. No matter how much you wanted it to work, things with you and him were too complicated and with a baby in the mix, it was too much to lose. You were so sure about this but for some reason when you called him over to explain it, you had an wave of uneasiness in your belly. But you stayed the course, expressing to Eren that it wasn't a good idea for you all to jump back into a serious relationship after so much mess had happened. Did he understand? Hell no. Why is he okay to sleep in your bed but not enough to be your man. His heart shattered in pieces when you told him you wanted to keep it friendly but he wouldn't show it on his face. Not in front of you. He wanted you to know he respected your backwards ass decision.

So it seemed like you were back at square one, coparenting and some relationship that bordered between ‘my man my man my man’ and ‘oh we are just friends’. Granted none of your other male friends know how you taste, how you moan when your clit is sucked on, and how to hit that sweet spot that you could only reach when he has you pressed into the mattress, fingers splayed out on your back as he… “No.” you say verbally. It wasn't the time for that, not now or anywhere in the near future. You had made the decision and you had to stick beside it. But you knew that you had to get him out of your head. So you distanced yourself as much as you could, only allowing parental visits and no late night stays. No personal phone calls outside of communication about your son. Nothing to give any indication to the feelings you worked so hard on burying.

Eren hated it.

He hated every lost moment. He hated not being able to touch you. He hated waking up in an empty bed. He hated the way that you would stand on the other side of the room when he came to pick up his baby. It was exhausting but he stayed. It was another night out for you. Eren had come over to babysit and you were just finishing up getting ready when he stepped into the doorframe. You swipe the nude butter gloss over your lips once more, pressing them together to distribute the color when your eyes caught the piercing green ones burning into your skin. You both held each other’s gaze for a while, emotions mixed with arousal building underneath your skin. You forced your eyes to shift back down to your vanity, busying your hands with cleaning the space in front of you. Eren smirked behind you, shifting from leaning against the doorframe and placing his hands on the frame above. “So, you all set to go?” He asks you. “Uh, yeah I think so. I just have to grab some shoes.” You say getting up and walking over to your closet.

You look around at your shoes to find a pair that went well with your multicolored satin dress. The beautiful green, brown,and cream colors blended into a perfect gradient in the fabric and the straps fell gently off your shoulders. You looked down at your choice of cream colored shoes before reaching down and picking up the tie up stilettos, steering clear of the red bottoms. Eren noticed and held back his grin, thinking back to the last time you asked him to pick your shoes for you over FaceTime.

“Okay, all set.” You say, this time actually being ready. “Okay, he should be waking up from his nap in about 2 hours and there are plenty of bags of milk already thawed out. You went over the breakdown for the night, running him through the routine he already knew like the back of his hand. Eren knew you were doing it more so as a checklist for yourself so he allowed you to ramble. “Good?” You say finishing your last thought. “Yeah, all good.” You nod gently and make your way to the door. “Oh, Would it be cool if the guys stopped by later? They asked about lil man but I wanted to make sure you were okay with them being here first.” Eren asks. “Yeah, Ren of course. You know I don't mind them being here.” You say brows pulling together slightly. He shrugged his shoulders from the bottom of the stairs. “Just checking. Have fun.” Your lips part to say something but words seem to get lost. Eren keeps his eyes casted towards the floor, not having the strength to look up and see you leave.

“Eren…” you start but he shakes his head. “Go enjoy yourself babydoll.” You press your lips together then turn and walk out the door.

“YO! We here.” A voice calls from the door. Eren rolls his eyes. “You know you could just knock right?” He says to Ony as he opens the front door. “Where’s the fun in that?” He laughs before dapping him and walking inside. “Whats up with you bro? You good?” Connie says as they come through the doorway and walk towards the living room. “Now why you ask the man that. You know he down bad right now.” Armin teases plopping down on to the reclining chair close to the tv. “Oh so y'all got jokes now? Do we really want to have it out?” Eren says matter of factly. “It’s okay bruh, we know you down bad for your girl.” Ony laughed. “Right and how is that best friend relationship treating you?” Eren teases back. Connie and Armin bust out into laughter. “See that’s different, you actually had a relationship with your girl.” Ony groans slumping down into the seat.

“Okay, okay but all bullshit aside E, how are you doing with all this?” Armin turns, giving him his attention. Eren took a moment. “I-…not good man.” He admits to his friends. “I don't get it. Y’all have always been in this space right? So what’s the difference between then and now.” Connie questions. “The difference is she’s talking to somebody.” Eren says softly. The room seemed to stand still at his confession. “What do you mean ‘talking’? Like the same guy?” Armin sits up, his stare intense. This was new for all of you. As long as you and Eren had been together, the guys have always been there. Even through the breakups you would never find yourself in another relationship. Fucking around was different but being committed to any guy besides Eren was not your thing.

Until now.

“I mean the past few date nights has been the same guy. I know I tripped out the Jean situation but they were just fucking. This ‘Reiner’ dude or whoever he is, she’s dating him man. Like sending flowers and love notes, brunches, and day trips type of shit.” Eren groans “Oh shit…” Ony whispered under his breath. “Yeah, exactly.” Eren’s shoulders slump slightly as he shook his head. “Well, E it might just be a phase. Don’t give up on it bro. If you work hard enough at it things have a way of sorting themselves out.” Connie says collecting stares from around the room. “What?” He says confused. “When the fuck did you get some common sense?” Ony asks. “Yeah, that’s my role.” Armin retorts. Eren begins to chuckle which turns into a full on laugh out loud followed by everyone else. “Man fuck yall. I’m just trying to help my boy out.” Connie tries defending himself through the noise.

The sound of baby whimpers from the monitor pulls Eren’s attention. He stands up and walks back up the steps towards his son’s room. He sat up in the crib rubbing his chunky fists into his eyes. Eren walks over and lifts him carefully from the bed, adjusting him and holding him against his hip. “What’s up little man. You all good? Daddy’s here.” He cooes. His son tilts his head up, sleep still in his eyes and offers his daddy a gentle smile. “Yeah, daddy’s here. Come on let’s go downstairs and see your uncles.”

“Aw man there go my lil homie.” Connie says as Eren comes back downs he steps. “Man he don't even like you. You know I'm his favorite.” Ony speaks getting up from the couch. They follow Eren into the kitchen as he takes out a few bags of the breast milk you left to warm up. “Y’all doing all that talking but yet I’m the goddaddy.” Armin smirks, slipping around the counter and grabbing the baby from Eren. He giggles, reaching out and squeezing Armin’s face. “Man, he looks just like Y/N. It’s still crazy to think yall got a baby together.” He says, shaking his head. “I know right. I still can't believe it myself sometimes.” It was true. Eren looks down at your son again and his chest swells with pride. It was so surreal to have something that was created from him and the person he cared for the most. As they sit around and conversation Eren takes the time to warm up the milk, grabbing his phone from his pocket. A text message dings from an unknown number.

He pulls up the attachment sent to his phone. “What the fuck…” his eyes squint as he stares down at the video loading before him. “What. The. Fuck?!” Eren says a little louder, catching the attention in the room. “Yo E, you good man?” Ony asks. Eren’s ears started to ring as anger swirled through his veins. His chest rose and fell rapidly. “Eren, talk to us man, what's going on?” Connie says. “Aye Min, can you put him in his playpen with the bottle please.” Eren strains, trying to keep him composure around his son. Armin nods quickly working to get the baby and setting him in his safe area. “Okay, what’s up?” He says as he walks back into the kitchen. Eren sits his phone down and slides it across the counter to his friends. They hovered around the screen and watched as you made out against a car outside of the restaurant. Reiners hands sliding all over your body as he kisses your lips and down the side of your neck. Your giggles fill the air as your hands slip up to the back of his head.

“Oh shit.” They say in unison before looking back up at Eren who was pacing across the floor. His vision began to blur as his fists clenched and unclenched. “E, you got to chill bruh. You can't overreact on this one. Come on.” Armin says in a calming voice. “Yeah E, you got to breathe man.” Ony reassures him. “I know. I know, man. FUCK, I know. I just-…” He didn't know what to do. Eren swipes his hands down his face as the burning behind his eyes intensifies. There was a silence that swept through the air. A heavy silence that was filled with uncertainty and fear. Eren had never felt this feeling of unease before. Not with you. But the fear of what this meant for you both. Is this the end of you and him for good? The nerves cause his emotions to overwhelm him as he slumps down to the floor. Armin, Connie, and Ony come and sit down next to him. No words could explain but they stayed with him, allowing him to process everything.

“What am I supposed to do man?” He asks no one in particular. “Do what you can. One day at a time.” Armin says. Eyes shifted up at the ceiling until the burning went away. He took a deep breath. Judging from the angle of the video, he knew you knew nothing about being recorded. So the only things on his mine were, who the fuck was following you and how was he going to face you when you got home…

[masn-mount]

hiii what about a fic where Jude and you have broken up, him being the one to do it and one night he comes to you to talk or something and he sees you all dressed up ready to go out and you can take it from there. xx

thank you for your request anon! the ending is a little rushed because I wanted to post it before a trip I'm going on! I hope you like it and please let me know what you guys think. xx

warnings: swearing, a lil bit of angst, fluff,

words: 3,4k

The back and forth pacing wasn’t doing Jude any favor.

It was making him more nervous and the longer he looked at the few stairs leading to your front door the more his head was telling him to turn around and leave.

You had ignored his calls and left his texts on read.

It upset Jude even if he didn't have any reason to think you would want to talk to him. He was the one who ended your relationship and left you heartbroken.

Six months ago you had travelled to Germany to visit him and when the weekend came to an end you were sat on his bed listening to him tell you that he ‘couldn’t do this anymore’, he had way too much on his mind and his new career decision was making it difficult for him to focus on anything else.

You were left speechless.

There had been no fight or any clues telling you that he no longer wanted to be with you. He hadn’t been distant or pulled away from you physically or emotionally so you tried telling him that if he truly loved you as much as he told you he did earlier that day then you could make it work but nothing you were saying was getting through to him.

That night you collected your things scattered around his apartment before leaving early the next morning and you didn’t cry until you got into your taxi and ‘someone like you’ by Adele started playing through the speakers.

It was like the universe was playing a prank on you.

Jude wasn’t sure when he had collected himself but after taking a few deep breaths and thinking back to the pep talk his brother had given him he walked up the stairs and pressed his knuckles to the door. He knocked three times before taking a small step back and like a coward he hoped you weren’t home even if he could see the light in the hall and your bedroom on. “Hi, I’m just going t-, Jude?”

You stood before him with your mouth slightly agape, unsure of what to say and all Jude wanted to do was leave because the last thing he expected to see was you standing before him in a black dress that hugged your figure so perfectly. Your lips were coated in a red lipstick and you were in the process of putting on a pair of gold hoop earrings when he had interrupted you. "What are you doing here?"

"Want t-, need to talk to you and you weren't answering my calls or texts so I just came here." He looked shy and embarrassed as he stood before you in a simple white shirt and grey joggers and all you could think about was how good he looked. He was undeniably the most attractive boy you had ever seen and somehow he had managed to get even more handsome in the few months you hadn’t seen him.

“You came here from Spain?”

“I went to visit family too but yeah, pretty much.” Jude knew you were getting ready for a date. The perfume you were wearing gave you away because it was the one you always wore on date night's. It was selfish of him to feel jealous and slightly angry at the thought of someone else taking you out, making you smile and possibly taking you home after but he couldn’t shake the feeling away. “You’re going on a date.” It wasn’t a question, just a simple statement.

You shrug before nodding, “yeah, just a guy I met at the gym. I guess he thought I looked pretty all sweaty and wanted to take me out,” you were trying to lighten up the mood a little because the way Jude was looking at you was making you nervous and you hated how he still had that affect on you. “It’s really casual still.”

“I didn’t want to know.” Jude regretted snapping, it wasn’t like him and he never wanted to talk to you that way but the whole situation was doing his head in.

You purse your lips, dropping your hands to your sides after finally putting your earrings on. “Right, so why are you here?”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to snap.” You felt a little guilty about the whole situation even if you had no reason to. You had every right to go out and see other people after sulking for months but if the roles were reversed you know you'd feel upset too.

Your friends had tried to set you up with their friends and coworkers for months but you always said no until three days ago when Alex asked you out for dinner. You had seen him at the gym many times. He was nice and you shared some good conversations so when he asked you out for dinner you said yes because you couldn't sit around and wait for your feelings for Jude to just go away one day because you knew they wouldn't.

You look up at Jude, frown on your face to see him avoiding looking at you, his own brown eyes set on the wall where a picture of the two of you used to sit. “Yeah, that wasn’t fair.”

“I haven’t even looked at another girl yet.” It was a cheap shot and he’s not sure why he said it but it was true. Just like your friends, his own had tried to set him up with different girls but he always said no.

When he finally looked at you he could tell you were trying to keep your composure, trying to not go off on him even if it was exactly what he deserved for you to do.

"What you do is no longer my concern just like what I do isn't yours." You take a deep breath before looking at him, "you are the one who broke up with me out of nowhere and completely blindsided me." It was difficult for you to keep it together, to not cry but you wanted him to understand even if he was shaking his head the entire time you spoke. "You made it clear that you don't love me so I can't just sit around and wait for you, Jude."

“I never said I don’t love you.”

"You didn't have to." You awkwardly cough when Jude doesn't speak, repedetly blinking so you'd keep the tears you knew were approaching at bay. "My date's going to be here any moment."

"Bab-, y/n, don't go, please." His voice cracks at the end of his sentence. "I just want to talk, please stay and let's do that, yeah?"

"I can't do that, you know I can't," and just when Jude is about to tell you that he never stopped loving you for even a second he hears a cough behind him and he doesn't need to turn around to know that it's your date.

"Hope I'm not interrupting," Alex walks past Jude like he's not even there and leans in to kiss your cheek before standing up straight and giving the boy in front of him a once over. A little laugh escapes his mouth before he speaks. "If it isn't Jude Bellingham! I'm a huge fan, mate." You're standing biting your lip and Jude wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh or punch the smug bastard in the face but in the moment he settles for shaking Alex's outstretched hand and without another word he turns around and walks away because fuck, that had not gone how he had hoped.

You’re not entirely sure if you’re awake or in a dream when you hear knocks against your front door.

You bury your head under your covers as you try to ignore the sound coming from downstairs but when another knock is heard you groan before getting out of bed and in your half sleepy state you make it down the stairs and to your front door. A quick look into the peep hole confirms your suspicions that Jude was the one disturbing your much needed sleep.

“Need to tell that twat from earlier that I’m not his mate.” 

“Jude!" You shriek when he walks past you.

He stumbles a little before sitting down on the ground when you ask him to take off his shoes before he steps on your carpet. "Have you completely gone and lost your mind? You can't just show up here at almost three in the morning!"

“You didn't answer your phone, you never do."

“I was sleeping!” Your eyes are bewildered and when Jude finally properly looks at you he can't focus on a single word you're saying or how angry you look as your arms move around you with every word you speak because all he can focus on is the black and yellow Dortmund shirt you're wearing. The fact that you had kept it made him happy and knowing that you wore it to bed made him feel all warm inside before it hit him that he wouldn't get to see you proudly wear his new teams jersey.

"My shirt?"

You shake your head before a tiny smile tugs at your lips, "no, I got it from Gio." You didn't realize just how much you had missed hearing him laugh until that moment. "I'm being serious tho, Jude, you can't just show up here this late." You help him up and to your livingroom before hurrying to your kitchen so you can fill up a glass of water for him.

"Please, drink this." He does as you ask and after putting the glass on the table he leans forward and rests his head on your chest, telling you that he just needs a cuddle and when you don't push him away you feel him smile against your neck.

"I know you hate when I'm drunk."

“I do.”

"Your date," he mumbles against your neck, "was he nice? did he pull out your chair and all that."

You laugh, "it was a shit date." You had nothing in common with Alex and even if he had come across as a nice guy when you had met him he was a total different person at dinner. You didn't mind confidence in a guy but he had been arrogant all night and borderline rude when you had told him you wanted to go home and not back to his place.

Jude can't deny that he feels happy that your date had been bad, happy that you probably wouldn't see Alex again but he also felt a little guilty because maybe the reason why you hadn't enjoyed your night was because he had showed up just before and ruined it for you. "M'sorry."

"You're not," you shake your head with a breathy laugh and when he giggles against your neck you suddenly feel overwhelmed and don't realize that small tears had gathered on your waterline until your blink and a few of them escape and fall down your cheeks. "You can't just show up here like this anymore."

"You've said that already but you won't tell me why," you just shake your head and when he presses his lips against the skin of your neck you just close your eyes because you can't find strength to push him away. "It's so fucking hard to not have you and hearing you say tha-, that you think I don't love you it hurt me and it wasn't fair because I love you so much."

"It wasn't fair making me feel that way either." Your tears are falling freely now and Jude looks up when he feels one land on his knuckles even if the crack in your voice already gave away that you were crying.

"Please, don’t cry, hate seeing you cry.”

"I know."

"I never ended things because I stopped loving you," he was starting to sound like a broken record but he needed you to understand that his feelings for you had never changed. "I know it sounds like the worst excuse ever, 'oh it wasn't you it was me' but it's the truth," a light shiver runs down your back when you feel his hand slip under your shirt, his fingers move across the skin of your back and it's almost like Jude doesn't even notice that he's doing it. "All of these incredible things are happening and when I'm in bed at night all I can think about is how I wish you were there with me and I wish I would have asked you to just pack your bags and come with me but at the time it felt so selfish to ask that of you because I felt like I let you down."

You frown at him followed by a light shake of your head, "you could never let me down."

"I promised you that I was coming back to play in England."

You just give him a sad smile, "plans change and if anything you deciding to challenge yourself again by going to another country only made me feel prouder, not many nineteen year olds have the belief and confidence to do what you've done."

"I just wanted the best for you."

"You gave me everything I wanted, Jude."

“Did I really?”

“Yes!” Your eyebrows are furrowed and lips parted, not quite understanding his reasoning because you had never given him a reason to think you weren't happy or that you needed more from him. The moment he had told you that he had made the decision on his future and that he had picked going to Spain you had been ready to move with him, all you ever needed was for him to ask but he never did.

"What?"

"What?"

"You would have moved to Spain?"

"I-," you feel your cheeks heat up because you hadn't meant to say those words out loud, "yeah, I would have."

"I'm such a fucking idiot."

"Yeah, you are," you smile a little and he just shakes his head, "I don't want you running around in the streets at this time so you can stay here if you want."

"Here as in?"

"On this perfectly fine sofa."

"I can't sleep here!"

"Sure you can," you laugh a little at how offended he looks.

"It's cold."

"I can bring you an extra blanket."

"Babe, don't be ridiculous."

Your knew you wouldn't be able to sleep by yourself knowing he was in your house but you enjoyed teasing him. "You're actually a child," you stood up, removing yourself from his hold and walk up the stairs with Jude following closely behind and when you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom, he walks into your room and sits on your bed. He notices that besides your curtains not much had changed in you room. "Okay, just stay on your side of the bed."

"My side, yeah?" You tuck a piece of your hair behind your ear before crossing your arms over your chest and all Jude can focus on is how your shirt rides up and exposes even more of your thighs.

"Do you need anything before we sleep?"

"A kiss."

"You're really going to push all my buttons aren't you?"

"Speaking of buttons, can you help me undo mine? they're way too small." You want to tell him no but before you can you're already walking the short distance to where he's sitting. You stand between his legs, foot hitting into his shin when his hands move to the backs of your thighs, he gives you a lazy smile before he pulls his hands away and leans back on them. "I can't help it, you're so fuc-,"

"Don't be cheeky," you're trying to focus on the buttons of his black shirt but they were indeed small and the way he was looking at you was making it difficult for you to even think but after what felt like hours you managed to undo the shirt and with a pat to his now bare chest you walked around him and got under the covers.

You had more of his old shirts in your wardrobe but you weren't going to give him the satisfaction of knowing you'd kept more than the one you were wearing.

You could feel the bed moving for a few seconds before Jude got comfortable. You stay still for a few minutes, back against him and you think that maybe he's fallen asleep but just as you're about to turn around you feel him move closer before his arm wraps around your waist, his face so close that you can feel his lips against the top of your head. Your whole body goes stiff before he mumbles for you to just relax against the top of your head and when he places his hand over yours and let's his thumb stroke over your skin you feel yourself melt into him.

"I just want to hold you. I missed you so much, so fucking much." You just nod, "I'll do anything to fix this, if you let me," he pulls you a little closer even if you didn't think it was possible. "I've wanted to come here so many times but I was a coward and called instead because deep down I knew you wouldn't answer so that would mean you wouldn't end the small hope I had that I could have you again." Jude could feel his eyes starting to feel heavy with sleep and he wasn't sure if you were still awake but when you squeeze his hand a little before turning in his arms he feels like his heart might beat out of his chest when you lean in and press a light kiss to his cheek.

When you pull back the tip of Jude's nose nudges your cheek as his face moves closer to you, you process what he's about to do and you let your head fall on his pillow to avoid his kiss, his lips fall on your cheek instead and you feel him smile against your skin, he let's out a chuckle before his head drops to your shoulder. Your hand moved to his back so you can lightly skratch it with your nails.

"Sorry, just got carried away," Jude felt overwhelmed being so close to you again because it felt so normal, almost like nothing had changed. "Just felt right," he said, you could barely make out what he was saying from how he was speaking against your neck.

"I know," you whisper because you felt the same and by that point you realize that you're completely gone for him, maybe you always were. You thought of him daily and when he would call you wanted to answer but just like him you were afraid that it would lead to that true closure neither of you had and you didn't want that. You never stopped checking up on him through your mutual friends, always asking them how he was and you never missed a single one of his games.

After a minute of silence, Jude speaks, "do you miss us?" He had wrapped his arm around you again, his chin resting on top of your head as he spoke, "do you miss me?"

"All the time," he rests his head against the pillow when you answer his question, eyes directly on you as he brushes his knuckles down your cheek before grabbing your jaw, eyes moving down to where his thumb was running over your lower lips. You know you won't be able to deny him again so instead of waiting for him it's you who leans in, capturing his lips with your own. Jude's fingers continue stroking over your cheeks as he pushes closer to you, trapping your body underneath his own.

His lips are just as soft as you remembered them.

He let's his tongue swipe across your bottom lip before sucking lightly onto it and you can't help but moan at the feeling which makes Jude smile against your lips. He leans his head back for a second, he nudges your nose with his own before leaning back in and it feels like you've kissed for hours when you pull away. Your eyes are closed, head still leaning back on the pillow when you speak, "I was meant to be stronger than this," you giggle. Jude kisses you once more before laying his head on you chest and when your hand moves to the back of his head while the other one moves up and down his back all Jude can think is that he was always meant to be right there, with you.

"M' girl."

[elderberries-and-honey]

Good morning 🌄 In case you missed the news, I wanted to remind everyone that The Baudelaires are starting fresh. But I'd like to make note of a few things.

I have moved the old Baudelaire content to this blog for organizing purposes (still need to pick a theme and tag everything though). Their posts will still be here but I wanted to free up their tags but still make it available to read chronologically if desired. So I figured this would be the easiest way to do that.

The Baudelaires will still feature poses and whatnot. Like I'm not going to only be doing gameplay and this is still a story after all. But, unlike in the past, I'm going to try and use the game to determine the personalities, interests, hobbies, etc. and roll with some of the randomness it throws at me, and use the challenge rules to determine their fates where it calls for it.

We will be doing away with realistic aging. I went back and forth on this a ton and have decided that for the sake of gameplay, and my busy schedule, this is the easiest way for me to play and keep track of things. I also feel it won't get me sucked in too deep / heavy into exclusively posing and keep me interested in actually playing my pixels. I also really want to be able to enjoy each decade for longer and lean into tropes from the decades and feel this is the best way for me to do that.

Sadly, I'm also going to do away with telling an Irish history perspective. It was really hard to make that decision and it's still a hyper fixation of mine, but it feels like a larger project than I can handle right now. In the future, I think it could be really cool to explore that with a realistic timeline but, for now, we will put that to rest and save it for another day.

I really hope people aren't too disappointed with this choice and still feel connected to my story regardless, even if it's a bit less realistic. I'm feeling a little insecure about this decision solely for the fact most decades challenges use a realistic aging / time progression system and really like to lean into the realism aspect of it all. However, I know at the end of the day, this is supposed to be for me and this is what is best for where I'm at in life right now.

I also would like to add that I admire whatever way people choose to play their game and my decision is not a reflection of me not liking or enjoying the content that exists in this space. I adore the stories, and the dedication people have for telling a story that means something to them, regardless if they consider themselves more storytelling, gameplay or a mixture of both.

And to end on a happier note, I've been on my last vacation for the year so I have a lot in the queue and will be doing daily posts Monday - Friday, otherwise I'm going to get too far ahead of where you guys are in the story. If the queue starts to run out, I'll switch to Monday, Wednesdays, and Friday again. Baudelaires return starting on Monday morning @ 10:00 am cst! :3 Be there or be square 🫵🏻

[girlokwhatever]

₊˚ପ⊹˚୨୧⋆ ⋆༉‧₊˚.: ̗̀➛ she loves me, she loves me not,,

part 3 ; back and forth

previous part

paige bueckers x fem!reader (fake dating trope)

it’s been a week since you last saw paige, relentlessly rejecting her invitations to hangout and spend time together.

at first you were able to use the excuse of being sick as you feigned cough over the phone. but after five days, realizing no one else was sick and you sounded relatively fine, she stopped believing you. you only answered her phone calls, typically ignoring her texts and using the excuse of sleeping being the reason you hadn’t ever replied.

she was starting to get annoyed. especially when she saw you out in public with a group of your friends. you lied, and now she caught you red-handed.

she approached your friend group, recognizing a few of them. you were laughing, no cough and no watery eyes from the cold you claimed to have. if anything you seemed great, smile glowing like you didn’t have a care in the world.

“hey, babe!”

“paige- hey.. what are you doing here?” you attempt to keep the cheery tone of your voice alive, smile still plastered on your face.

“i could ask you the same thing.”

“i’ll catch up to you guys later.” you wave yourself goodbye, turning away from your friends in what seems like a loving embrace with paige.

she’s pissed. her brows are furrowed and there’s an evident frown on her lips as she looks at you. you try to come up with some excuse for being here, something to cover up your avoidance of the woman standing in front of you. nothing comes to mind though and you’re stuck in the awkward silence for a few moments.

“are we just gonna pretend like you haven’t been lying to me for a week?”

“i haven’t.”

“right. i can obviously see how deathly sick you are.”

the reality of your behavior started to sink in, guilt trickling into your consciousness. you knew you had your reasons though, even if it wasn’t properly executed.

after the party last weekend everything shifted for you. you knew it could only end one way and figured taking matters into your own hands wouldn’t be too bad. if you pushed her away, maybe whatever was going on between the two of you would fade.

it wasn’t. it consumed paige’s every breath. every thought and emotion. once she figured out you probably weren’t actually sick, her heart sank. she couldn’t understand what was going on with you or your ‘relationship.’ your lack of communication didn’t help much either.

“i don’t really want to talk about this.”

“then what else should we talk about? maybe we should talk about how all my friends are asking where my girlfriend went and i have to make up some lame excuse on why you refuse to talk to me. let’s talk about that. or maybe we can talk about how you’ve completely shut me out. or do you have nothing to say? like you’ve had nothing to say for a while fucking week.”

“shut up.”

“no, i-”

“shut up. bianca is like, ten feet away.”

she’s about to turn her head (amateur move) in the direction you’re looking but you stop her, managing to cup your hands around her face in time. her eyes still wander around trying to catch a glimpse of something, anything, but decides you’re the best view.

even though she’s mad, upset, and honestly hurt that you lied, she can’t feel that way forever when you look like that. you’re looking straight into her eyes like you’re searching for something. paige’s eyes scan over you in your entirety, especially landing on your lips every now and then.

and it’s as if, by some miracle, you understand what her eyes are saying. her eyes are saying something her words can’t and won’t say. without giving yourself time to process your decision, you pull paige in by the sides of her face and kiss her.

it’s surprisingly slow and sweet, only lasting a few seconds. you thought you’d panic into it but it just felt so natural. paige’s hands find solace on your hips, pulling you closer when you part from her lips.

she doesn’t know if bianca is still watching and honestly doesn’t even care. she pulls you into a kiss of her own, this one being much more desperate and heated. you have to grip the back of her neck to steady yourself as she pulls you further into her space. the kiss lasted longer than either of you intended, finally pulling away and fighting for air.

paige is still so close to you, holding your body against hers. she leans in, kissing your forehead, then moves her face down to your ear, “don’t ever avoid me like that again.”

you nod at her words, not taking the time to comprehend how serious her tone is. when you turn your head you catch a glimpse of bianca and she’s already staring back at you, a deep frown settled on her face. you look away from her instantly and focus back on paige, who is still standing in front of you with her hand on your cheek.

“i’m so sorry i did that, i really should’ve asked first.”

“nah, don’t apologize. girlfriends kiss, right?”

you experience a whirlwind of emotions almost instantly. realizing everything that’s happened in the span of five minutes astonishes you undoubtedly. you can’t believe you kissed paige, and even more so than that, you can’t believe she kissed you back. out of her own free will, she pulled you back into another kiss.

paige was probably the best you’ve ever had too, but you don’t really have her.

it’d been a few weeks since the beginning of your scheme with paige. things were starting to go better, get more casual. she was sitting on your couch next to you, your legs draped over hers as you watched a movie together.

you never ended up officially talking about the kiss or the fact that you ignored her. you were thankful that she just let those moments pass because you honestly had no idea what kind of excuse you could make up for either.

paige’s hand brushed through your hair and gently pulled out any tangles as she went. it was sweet, loving even. anyone from an outside perspective would think it to be highly romantic.

“hey, i think im gonna go out with my friends tonight. eva’s trying to plan this friend get-together thing.”

she turns to you, peeling her eyes away from the screen. her gaze flickers between your eyes and lips, something you don’t notice because you’re texting eva back.

paige can’t help but to think about how beautiful you are, especially when it’s her shirt you’re wearing. it’s nothing out of the ordinary, even before your predicament, but it feels much more intimate now.

“that’s cool. where’re yall gonna go?”

“to a club i think. eva’s a party girly.”

“like you?”

you feign a gasp, finally looking at paige. she’s looking back at you with a grin because she loves to tease you and she loves being right.

“like me?! i’m not,” you’re shaking your head in denial. there’s still a smile on both of your faces when you lock eyes. paige’s hand stills in your hair, traveling down to the back of your neck.

she hardly even registers that she pulls your face into her, meshing your lips together. she kisses you, slotting her lips between yours in a delicate moment of intimacy. you kiss her back like it’s second nature to you. you find so much peace and comfort in paige that you practically forget she’s only your friend.

you’re pulling away first with wide eyes and pinker lips. paige also seems to be snapping back to reality, immediately standing up and apologizing.

“shit- princess i’m so sorry. i just forgot-”

you cut her off; the awkwardness of the moment being close to unbearable, “it’s okay paige. i’m just gonna..”

“yeah, you should.. y’know.”

“yeah.. i’ll go get ready. you can um..”

“i’ll just go, yeah. i’ll see you later.”

“see ya.. i’ll, y’know, text you later.”

“sounds good.”

she leaves you to the silence of your apartment, the soft hum of the air conditioning suddenly seeming so deafening. paige’s voice buzzes in your ear as you stare at her spot on the couch. millions of emotions and revelations wash over you like holy water, and finally the stars seem to align for you. you finally have some semblance of understanding as to why.

you feel a tear trickle down your face, rolling over your cheek and eventually down your chin. you sit back down on the couch while more tears continue to fall, a choked sob escaping you before you even register how upset you really are.

you love paige. it was so hard to admit to yourself, guilt creeping in at the thought that maybe, in some way, bianca was right. it had been a long time since you loved bianca, always naturally gravitating towards paige more and you could see how that would hurt her. there was no physical cheating, but mentally you had always been with paige.

paige is the best you’ve ever had relationship-wise, but you can never have her. she’s this untouchable entity, one that could ruin your life if you let her. if you get with her, bianca was right and no one can deny it.

you think that maybe you put yourself and paige in this position on purpose subconsciously because this was the only way you felt like you could have her. maybe it was a form of further.

but now that your situation is actually live, it’s slapped in your face how fake it is. none of those feelings were real for her. it was all a game you two were playing.

maybe you were right. you couldn’t have her.

you wiped your tears away, pulling yourself off the couch and towards your room. you needed to escape into your own form of reality, one that wouldn’t come back to haunt you.

since you’ve finally been able to successfully admit your unrealistic and unrequited feelings for paige, you can begin to move on from them. maybe tonight you could find something to help you move on. or someone.

⍣ ೋ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊🀥·˚ ༘

GUYS I WILL SPELL CHECK THIS SOME OTHER TIME

why do i feel like this series makes zero sense

guys if you have genuine feedback pls lmk PLS

like is this even good anymore seriously.

[prythiansfavoritefox]

[ Soothe ] for Elucien 🤍

Elain slumped onto her bed, exhausted. It had been a hard day's work of gardening. Her muscles were completely sore. With little else to do in the Night Court, gardening had practically become her daily job. Not like they'd allow her to do anything else. Her request to scry in place of her sister had been denied. They'd rather an emotionally unstable Nesta try than her. It showed what little they thought of her. Bleh.

Elain rubbed her eyes. She been planning on going straight to bed, but how was she going to sleep with all of these sore muscles? So, she made an impulsive decision.

She was exhausted, but she got out of bed and went towards the wraiths' rooms. She knocked on Nuala's door, and within a few moments, her and Cerridwen had appeared beside her like apparitions.

Other people might find them creepy, but they didn't bother Elain very much. She was a literal Seer; she was the weirdo to most people. "Take me to Lucien's house," she said quietly. The wraiths tilted their heads curiously at her. Elain was no fool; she knew the wraiths had been set on her to spy on her, but at least she could befriend them and somewhat gain the advantage. Perhaps in time, their loyalty would be to her and not Rhysand. That would be hilarious. "Are you going to interrogate me, or are you going to do as I say?" Elain asked, a little bite in her voice this time. At her sharp tone, the wraiths linked their arms with hers and the three of them disappeared into the shadows. It wasn't quite like winnowing; no, it was far more uncomfortable. Like melting into the shadows before coming to be again.

"Don't wait up for me," Elain called back at the wraiths, watching them disappear. She walked towards the door to Lucien's house. The whorls of wood on the front were elegant, and Elain could not help but admire the beauty that surrounded everything that had to do with this man. You would never catch him lacking in style.

It was so goddamn attractive.

Before she could knock on the door, Lucien opened it for her. "Elain," he murmured, and Elain squeezed her eyes shut for a moment to control her visceral reaction to the low timbre of his voice. "Lucien," she got out. God, her voice was so breathy; she was doing a terrible job at controlling her instincts. He moved aside so that she could walk in.

"Why are you here." Lucien's voice was careful, restrained. Elain didn't fail to notice his hands flexing back and forth, like he was resisting the urge to grab her and do unspeakable things to her.

Elain blushed. She bit her lip, and Lucien's eyes focused on it. "Couldn't sleep."

"So you decided to sleep walk and somehow wound up here?" he drawled sarcastically.

Elain's spine straightened at his tone. "No, I decided to come here."

"Why? You had no problem avoiding me like the plague for the past several months." He stalked away, and Elain stormed after him. "I just thought-"

"You thought wrong, Elain," Lucien replied.

Elain snorted. "Feyre was right. You are an asshole."

Lucien whipped his head around to her, and Elain stumbled back a step at the expression on his face. His eyes glowed a brilliant deep amber as fire entered his body. The room heated up more with every second. His hands were trembling, fists clenched so hard the skin was paling around his knuckles. "Did Feyre ever tell you what I did for her?" he whispered.

Elain blinked. "N-no I don't think so."

Lucien laughed mirthlessly. "Figures. She always had a bit of a victim complex. Impossible for her to admit she's wrong in any scenario." He took a step towards Elain, who took another step back. "Did you expect me to rejoice at the half-starved animal who had murdered my friend taking his place? Even if it was for the sake of breaking the curse? How would you have felt, if I had killed Feyre and I'd replaced her in your house? Not so nice, hmm?"

Elain opened her mouth, but no words came out. It was hard to think of words when Lucien focused all of his relentless attention on her. She tried again. "No. Not nice." Such a lame response, but she had nothing else to say. Lucien snorted. "Either way, I warmed up to her in spite of everything. She seemed alright...for a feral human, at least. And Tamlin loved her, so when she showed up Under the Mountain, I swore an oath to protect her for him."

Elain shook her head. Feyre had never told her any of this. Lucien continued. "But then, Amarantha dragged me in front of Rhysand and threatened to have me killed. Feyre offered up her name in exchange for my life. Despite me nearly getting her killed a couple of times before that. True, I saved her a lot more, but..." Elain rolled her eyes at his addition, and Lucien took another step forward, "from that point onward, I wasn't just protecting her for Tamlin or Prythian. I was doing it for her."

Elain took another step back. Lucien smirked at her retreat, continuing his story. "She was forced to face this gigantic creature called the Middengard Wyrm. I called out the direction it was coming from, thus saving her life and nearly damning my own. Amarantha ultimately spared my life on the condition that Tamlin whip me instead. Twenty times."

Elain gasped as Lucien began unbuttoning his shirt. "What are you doing?" Elain asked breathlessly, unable to stop watching as Lucien slid his shirt off, turning his back to Elain. There were long, jagged scars going all across Lucien's back. Elain stepped forward to look at them more closely when Lucien shrugged his shirt back on. "Am I still the asshole, Elain?" he asked darkly, then he walked away. Elain nearly screamed in frustration. The urge to touch him, beg him to stay, was uncontrollable. But her legs were screaming again, and she sighed as she settled on the plush carpet in Lucien's living room. Her muscles were burning with lactic acid.

"Elain?" Lucien was by her side in an instant, hand on her shoulder. "Are you ok?" His tone was a far cry from what it had been a few moments ago, purely gentleness and concern in it. He cursed under his breath. "I'm so sorry, Elain, I had no idea-"

Elain laid her hand over his. "It's nothing life-threatening, Lucien," she assured him. "My muscles are just really sore."

Lucien blushed. "Well...I could, you know...?"

"Could what?" Elain asked.

Lucien muttered, "Icouldmassageyouifthatsnottooinappropriate."

"What's that?" Elain yelled, pretending not to understand.

"Oh, I know you heard me, lady," Lucien replied, a bit of a flirtatious note in his voice now. Elain smirked. "You may massage me." She sat up, offering her back to him. He placed his warm hands on her shoulders and began to rub them in circles.

Holy Mother, he was good at this; Elain didn't know how she was going to get through this, especially when his hands moved down her arms, and he turned her around, taking one of her legs in his big palms. "May I?" he asked softly.

Elain barely managed to whisper, "Yes." His hands began working their magic on her upper legs, and she bit back her moan. She really shouldn't be as insanely turned on by this as she was. It was only made worse by the fact that Lucien's body was completely tense, his scent revealing that he was having just as much difficulty maintaining control as she was. When his thumbs dug into her inner thighs, she couldn't control her gasp.

Lucien immediately pulled away. "I'm sorry," he muttered, his cheeks scarlet. "I'll take my leave, my lady." He jumped up, hastily bowing, before he began to walk away. Bastard! He dare work her up this much and then just leave???? Hell no. Elain stomped up to him, shouting, "Lucien! You come back here this instant!" Lucien turned back to her, his russet eye wide, his metal one whirring like crazy. How was he just so effortlessly handsome? It drove Elain mad. So, she did the logical thing.

She stood on her tip-toes, grabbed Lucien by the collar, and slammed her lips to his.

[sheepfulsheepyard]

brooooooo i have not stopped thinking about the taryn/ghost court of shadows mission to another court

bestie 🫣 I am SO sorry that I am SO late but i promise i was literally thinking about every day because i was like i have VIBES but i need WORDS to respond!!!

okay, so i was super inspired by your idea of taryn luring all of the queen’s enemies to her for the court of the shadows by pretending to be the dissatisfied, slighted sister. and i was also turning over some ideas about the “wild” faerie who more or less shun the courts and reside the deeper, feral woods because locke’s father was a wild fae but—here was what got me—the ghost’s mother is also (implied to be) a wild fae.

and so the premise is that one of the lesser, smaller courts that’s situated much deeper into the woods (the “court of evergreens” or something idk) finally come to pay their respects to cardan and jude at the palace. since it’s such a comparatively backwater, remote place, being around two years late isn’t necessarily the faux pas that it would be. most importantly: it’s the main point of contact for the vast majority of the wild faerie, so the actual court itself is much smaller in comparison to other courts, with most participants being wild fae who cycle through every couple of decades and stay for a few years and move back out to the wild.

and when the lord of this court shows up to the palace, he decides that as a rural prince, he’s missing out on the trends of all the other gentry. so: he requests that the king allow him the hand in marriage of the queen’s mortal sister. after all, if the king of elfhame has a mortal queen, shouldn’t all the other faerie lords ought to follow suit? imitation the sincerest form of flattery (and loyalty), of course.

[and this is where some actual plot that I haven’t thought of yet would have to kick into gear, mainly what the evergreen court’s lord is larger goal is, why he actually wants a mortal bride to show his loyalty to cardan, how the court of shadows picked up on something suspicious, etc]

a whole running thread I’d like to also tug at is whether or not the wild fae are actually more or less human than the gentry we’ve already been acquainted with—in their looks, in their seclusion, in their regard for mortals—so also a part of this is that the lord is subtly disregarding jude as queen and taryn as his bride, but going straight to cardan.

but. basically this boils down to the court of shadows agreeing to a plan that taryn puts forth. she will go to the court for a year and allow the lord to court her so she can gather information all the while. it’s decided the lord has a year and a day to woo her before he proposes to her.

jude does not want any of this to happen, but taryn—who has only recently been granted something like probation/liaison status with the court of shadows—is very desperate to prove herself not just to the court but to herself. she wants to prove that she can charm and play and manipulate the faerie better than locke did her.

now, the catch is, of course, the ghost is going with her as her “attendant”/bodyguard/contact. and the ghost is watching all of this from sidelines somewhere between disbelief and growing anger, because he saw snippets of how miserable taryn was with locke, and he cannot believe she seems to want to replay this entire drama again from the start.

leander’s there as really the only anchor and i want a huge part of this to be like. taryn trying to figure out what went wrong with her, with locke, with them together, to somehow come up with a satisfying explanation—she secretly wants to see if she can find locke’s father, though she’s terrified of what that would actually mean in consequence. basically taryn trying to stumble her way back through her own decision-making and looking for a future.

but more on the day-to-day side is her and the ghost essentially fending for themselves in hostile environment that is also nothing but revels, picnics, hunts—so they’re so very close to each others’ own decision-making it’s starting to get extremely personal. I really, really want the ghost’s mother to show up—maybe as the member of the court, maybe not even recognizing him—and idea that taryn and the ghost really are on the edge of the wild, the edge of mortality, the edge of a mask. something something how you’re both living in an elaborate masquerade with everybody but each other.

this was VERY rough im so sorry I don’t even know if this is making sense ahhh!!! but here are also a couple of fun points i wanted—

when the lord of the evergreen court comes to propose to “the queen’s sister” in front of the entire court he does NOT make it clear which one and vivi immediately hides

locke’s father shows up at some point and maybe tries to. i don’t know. kill taryn for killing locke 🤷‍♀️ we love family drama

the wild maybe grow to less human features the more time they spend in the wild? i’m wondering how this would affect the half-human ghost…

taryn and the ghost sleeping back-to-back to guard for intruders

the ghost gets brought along as part of taryn’s retinue and as leander’s “sword instructor” despite the fact leander definitely isn’t old enough to walk

anyway thank you for putting your amazing tarynworks out into the world 💖

[mask-of-prime]

TLG: As You Move Forward

So I went a few months thinking about how I'd forgotten to include Makini to my past depictions of Kion's Guard as adults (1, 2), so I decided to celebrate the 4th anniversary (albeit 2 days late :p) of the Journey of Memories episode by finally showing off the adult design I have for her!

Because I'm still salty about TLG's last-minute decision in making Makini the Mjuzi of the Night Pride instead of Kiara's bestie like Season 2 hyped her up to be, I made a compromise by headcanoning that she frequently journeys back-and-forth between the Pridelands and the Tree of Life, especially when she's called over by each land for a ceremony of some kind.

Design Process:

To avoid making her look too much like a clone of her mother Fikiri, I figured that Makini would develop her dad Kitendo's features as she grew older (I think she's about 20-something in this image). It's kind of a thing for TLG to erroneously depict animals without their distinct sexual dimorphism (see: Mbuni the ostrich), but this time, I felt like embracing Makini's unusual bright colors for a female mandrill and make her look a little androgynous. I feel like it would fit her role as a Mjuzi for some reason lol

I figured the Bakora Staff she received at the Tree of Life would be her last new one as she's since learned to keep better track of it. I like to think that it symbolizes not only growth and learning, but it coming from the Tree of Life symbolizing that her true place is there.

In all that time she's owned it, being the crafty artist she is, she's put years of customization and souvenirs from her back-and-forth Pridelands/Tree of Life adventures into her decorating her staff, selecting just about every pretty flower and naturally-occurring bead she saw. I mainly sought out the idea of people bedazzling their canes for reference, she seems like the type to do that, making just about anything she owns pretty lol

Drawing Process:

ngl I got to work on this very much like that episode where Makini procrastinated on getting started on her portrait of Simba's family. I just, like... really struggled with the composition until I was hit with sudden inspiration to just go wherever my hand took me.

I grabbed a thumbnail sketch of my adult Makini design that I was the most happy with and rendered it digitally and was happy that it got me somewhere... then I ran into the background that I didn't put any thought into.

Because of the cropping and composition I already had going on with Makini's standalone model, it was very hard to come up with something she could be surrounded by, until I decided to insert some headcanons about a certain new TLG-related short Disney released. Basically: I headcanon Makini made those Circle of Life paintings that Kion shows to those younger cubs as I think the style they used in those paintings looks WAY different from Rafiki's (I mean the whole video looks different from the whole TLK art style). You can't tell me those purple pigments and cutesy flowers aren't something Makini would draw everywhere lol

Sources of Inspiration:

Sadly not pictured due to the angle and cropping is the headcanon that she paints her nails all the time, and she's always trying different color combos basically every week lol. I adopted that headcanon from iceflowerglow, who depicts Makini with painted nails in their comic "Shining Above Your Head". Other artists I drew inspiration from were Vtoony's "TLG: Kion's Guard" and tango_fizz.le's "Where'd all the time go?" when it came to designing her fully-developed mane.