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littlewriters-posts · 8 months ago

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Phoenix - Damon Salvatore

Part two of the request I got the other day

part one is here

https://www.tumblr.com/littlewriters-posts/751027674692059136/hey-darling-can-i-request-the-damon-salvatore-x?source=share

Plot: Y/N comes to mystic falls as a foster kid, knowing nothing of the supernatural world. The catch? Y/N lost all her memories, of the past 150 years.

Stefan had sworn both Elena and Damon to secrecy.

Damon had come storming in, his usual stony expression riddled with worry, interrupting Stefan and Elena, announcing the arrival of his old love - that somehow she had come back to life.

Elena was sceptical at first "Are you sure it's not just another doppelganger curse?" she asked, a frown on her face. The name rang bells in her head but she couldn't quite place why.

Stefan shook his head "No, she told Damon she had the Phoenix curse. Not too unsimilar from your one actually, apparently she when she dies she gets reborn again from the ashes, all memories wiped,"

"Except when she wore that necklace," Damon interjected "If we could just find it, we could get her memories back!"

And she would remember me, went unspoken.

Stefan sucked his teeth slightly. Part of him wanted to dismiss Damon's hope, but the other half recognized that this was the first ounce of humanity Damon had shown in years.

"What did you say her name was again?" Elena asked

"Y/N, L/N," Damon said "Apparently she's now living with your friend, the Bonnie," he raised his eyebrows at her, as if demanding an explanation.

Elena's eyes widened "Oh my god," she muttered to herself before turning back to Stefan "Bonnie said that her Grams had signed the papers to adopt this girl, Bonnie said it came out of nowhere. But then she died, and demanded that Bonnie's dad do it instead,"

"Y/N, from my time anyway, was very close to the Bennet witches," Stefan mused silently.

"Yeah they spent years looking for her, and failing," Damon added

Stefan then turned very serious "Damon if she is Y/N you cannot go near her. Remember she doesn't know you, and you don't want to scare her away,"

"I won't scare her away," Damon said looking mildly offended "I am the eternal stud, everyone loves me,"

Stefan rolled his eyes "We really need to find out if it is her first, or just some weird coincidence,"

"What so she can fall in love with some boring human?" Damon asked snidely.

Elena stood up, looking sympathetically at Damon, which he hated.

"Look she loved you once right? I'm sure she'll love you again," she reassured and Damon scoffed so she continued. "She'll be with Bonnie on Monday, I'll become friends with her first, then we can go from there,"

Damon grumbled, but seemed satisfied with that answer, and disappeared upstairs without another word.

Stefan walked up to Elena, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"As much as I hate to say it, he's not the same person he was when he first met her, and chances are she's exactly the same,"

Elena sighed "We'll see what she's like on Monday,"

Y/N was terrified. Dressed in her flares and green top that Bonnie had kindly bought for her, she faced herself in the mirror.

The thought of being in the same room as people she didn't know made her feel rather sick.

"You'll be fine," Bonnie reassured, leaning on the door "Come on, I'll drive you,"

Y/N nodded, brushing all negative thoughts out of her head as she followed her new friend out of the door.

She tried to focus on Bonnie's voice as she chatted at her, telling her all the school drama as if knowing that would help her fit in more with the rest of the group.

But all she could focus on was the outside world, and how different yet familiar it seemed to her.

"We're here," Bonnie announced "Come on, Elena and Caroline are meeting us inside,"

Y/N nodded, giving the other girl a grateful smile. Bonnie had already told her everything about the two others girls, Elena was the sweet one who's parents died in a car crash, and Caroline was slightly outspoken, but lovely when you got to know her.

Elena hadn't told her friends about Damon's history with the new girl, for some reason it didn't seem right. She didn't want to taint anyone's view of the girl before they met her.

Y/N hid behind Bonnie slightly, as they approached the two girls who were waving excitedly at them.

Caroline was quick to embrace Y/N in a hug "Oh I am so excited you're here! It's about time we got some new people in this town,"

Elena rolled her eyes with a smile "It's nice to meet you," she said

As Elena studied Y/N she couldn't help but think that she was nothing like she imagined. She pictured someone meddlesome, someone stony faced and cold hearted like Damon not - not this.

Elena watched as Y/N gave a shy smile, her head held high but fidgeting fingers giving away her nerves.

She reminded her of a baby deer...or lamb...or maybe an otter. Something vulnerable.

"How are you finding it? Have you ever been to school before?" Caroline asked. Elena smacked her arm

"Caroline!" she exclaimed and Caroline looked sheepish.

"Sorry,"

Y/N shook her head with a smile "It's okay, I don't mind answering questions. I - I actually have amnesia, I don't remember anything until I reached about sixteen? Then I was home-schooled by my foster mom,"

Caroline stared at her with wide eyes "So you've never been to a party?"

Y/N shrugged "I mean I might have done, I just won't remember it,"

"Well you're in luck, the founders ball is soon!" Caroline practically squealed "I won Miss Mystic Falls last year, so I can help pick out your dress!"

Y/N hesitated, the thought of entering the hall with yet more people was giving her heart palpations, but she also wanted to make friends.

"Sure, when?" she asked with a smile

"How about Saturday?" Caroline asked and Y/N looked to Bonnie for help.

"We'll be there," Bonnie reassured and Y/N sighed with relief, at least there would be somebody she knew.

"What class have you got first?" Caroline asked, reading Y/N scheduled over her shoulder "Oh no fair! You'll be with Elena and Bonnie," she sighed dramatically.

"ooo History with Mr Tanner, good luck," Elena said, giving Y/N a smile "He's evil,"

Y/N laughed "Surely he can't be that bad,"

Y/N was wrong.

Not only did Mr Tanner sit her at the back in between a boy called Matt Donavon, he also sat her behind another boy called Stefan Salvatore, who was so tall she had very little hope to see the board in-front of the class.

And then he had the audacity to ask her question's in-front of the entire class.

She was quite sure he face was utterly red, and Stefan turned round to face her, making the redness worse.

"It's okay, he did that to me the first time as well, he's a dick," he reassured and Y/N felt the sudden urge to hide under her desk.

"Thankyou," she whispered, her eyes lowering to her paper and Stefan gave her a soft smile, trying not to show his concern.

If he had any doubts now they were sealed. He only knew one person who looked that panicked when talking to people, and he could recognize that face anywhere.

Unfortunate it meant she was still the same person that she was before, and Damon wasn't.

After history Y/N was grateful to Caroline, who talked her ear off on who was hot and who was not, although she found herself growing weary of the constant chatter and found her gaze wandering across the courtyard.

A large crow caught her eye, as it stared at her unblinkingly.

"We're going to the Grill after school wanna come?" Bonnie asked, cutting Caroline off her rant as she did so.

"I'd love that," Y/N said softly, breaking her gaze from the bird.

"What have you got next?" Elena asked

"Er - maths," Y/N replied, checking her schedule.

"Ah shoot, we've all got Biology," Bonnie said sympathetically

"It's okay, Stefan has maths, he can show you the way!" Elena interjected, smiling at her friend.

Y/N grimaced, as much as she didn't have anything against the boy, she'd take getting lost as appose to having to strike up a conversation with a stranger.

"I don't want to bother him," she said quietly.

Elena shook her head, before waving Stefan over from where he sat on the bench.

"You'll like him, he's quiet like you," Caroline reassured and Bonnie rolled her eyes.

"Ignore her," she said smiling apologetically.

"What did I say?" Caroline frowned, but Y/N smiled.

"It's okay, I get what she meant."

Caroline smiled from ear to ear. She often felt out of place, constantly saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, or saying it the wrong way and getting reprimanded. But Y/N made her feel understood.

"Do you mind walking Y/N to maths?" Elena asked Stefan as he approached.

"Sure," he shrugged "I'll make sure you don't get lost,"

Y/N smiled gratefully, not quite meeting his eyes before waving goodbye to her friends and following alongside him.

"How are you finding your first day?" he asked eventually, noticing her fidgeting hands immediately.

"It's okay, just a lot of people," she shrugged, glancing around at the people shoving past her and she shrank a little.

"Must be overwhelming," he mused thinking slightly "You know there's a graveyard not far from here - sounds dark but I find it's the only place you can really get some peace and quiet,"

Y/N looked up at him, for the first time meeting his eyes. "Thankyou," she said earnestly. "I've only got a half day today, something about adjusting to school life, so I might go after then - where is it?"

"Turn right out of school, go down the road to the old bridge and turn left," Stefan said simply as Y/N hurried to jot it down.

Someone with her sense of direction had to be prepared.

"Great and er - how do I get to the Grill from there?" she asked nervously.

Stefan didn't judge "Follow the middle path into the woods, keep going and then go left at the second turning. Turn right when you get to the old building. Just follow that path and it'll lead you back to the street,"

She thanked him again, feeling slightly relieved that she wouldn't have to navigate it without help, nor would she have to ask a complete stranger.

After Maths, Y/N bid goodbye to the younger Salvatore brother, before texting the girls where she was going, and that she would meet them at the grill later. With Stefan's direction's written down, she was sure she wouldn't get lost, and too her relief she didn't.

So there she sat, next to a random grave, her head resting against the cool stone.

In her hands lay a notebook, the date marked clearly at the top as she jotted her thoughts down.

Her doctor had suggested a diary, after losing your memory for no apparent reason there was no evidence to suggest it wouldn't happen again.

She didn't notice Damon watched her from the shadows, a pained look on his face. He hated the way she looked so tense, her fingers often pulling at the strands of hair that had escaped the messy braid. He could even smell the blood that came from her bitten lips.

But what he hated most was how she was exactly the same. The same slight crease between the brows, the same nervous fidget patten, the same soft hum as she wrote.

It was like she had never changed, like nothing had ever changed her.

He wanted to speak to her, even for a moment but he stopped himself. She hadn't changed, but he had. Even if she did, even if she could, remember him, would she still love him after learning everything he had done? Everyone he had killed?

Would she be able to see past the scars he's obtained and his bloody hands and still be able to see him?

He didn't know. And that killed him.

So there in the shadows he stayed, watching and praying that she would be kept safe.

Y/N shut her book with a sigh, stuffing it back in her bag. She glanced at her phone and saw that it was time to go, surprised that she had been this long.

But it was nice, the quiet, it made her feel whole again.

"Right, to the Grill we go," she muttered, biting her lip slightly.

She slung her bag over her shoulder and started walking down the middle path. She was unaware the Damon was still watching her with the same pained expression.

She came to the turning and abruptly turning, feeling rather pleased with herself as she did so for not getting lost.

As she walked she took out the slip of paper she had jotted the directions down in, and to her absolute horror the ink had smudged.

"Oh no. Oh nononono," she muttered, looking around herself in horror. She remembered something about turning near a building but what building was that?

She turned, telling herself she would just go back the way she came and ask for help, before realising the path she was walking down was a forked path and she couldn't remember which one she had taken.

"Oh crap crap crap," she whispered.

She felt the air around her grow colder, her lungs fighting for air as she tried not to panic. She'd been lost before, she'd be fine. It's not like Mystic Falls was dangerous.

Behind his hiding place, Damon cursed himself. He looked at her panic stricken face, the face he'd seen a thousand times before when she was forced into social situations, and felt his heart tug slightly.

"You lost?"

Y/N whirled around, her eyes wide and heart pounding, before coming face to face with the man she met her first night of Mystic Falls.

"Damon?" she questioned, frowning slightly "What are you doing here?"

He shrugged, walking towards her trying to look as non threatening as possible. "I like it here, it's quiet,"

Y/N relaxed slightly "Stefan said the same thing - you're related aren't you? Same last name and all,"

Damon smirked slightly "Brothers," he responded. "So are you lost?"

Y/N's cheeks reddened slightly, a slight pout on her lower lip "If I say no, will you save me my dignity but help me anyway?"

Damon laughed "So you've got an abysmal sense of direction, it's not the worst thing to be bad at - come on, it's this way,"

"How do you know where I'm going?" she asked

Damon froze for a second before recovering "Stefan's going to the Grill too, I just assumed,"

Y/N shrugged, falling comfortably into step besides him. She couldn't tell what it was, but she felt more at ease with him than anyone she'd met so far at Mystic Falls. Like she already knew him.

"They go out a lot, I don't know how they do it," she mused, covering up a yawn.

Damon eyed her carefully, not wanting to come off like he was staring but also unable to tear his gaze away from her.

"You could just not go?" he offered but she shook her head.

"I can't, I need to go to the Grill anyway to ask about any jobs they've got going there," she sighed "These girls love shopping,"

Damon frowned "Job? Aren't you a little young to have to work? You should be out their partying," he smirked.

Y/N wrinkled her nose "Plenty people my age work Damon, I'm not a child. Besides, I don't have any family money...or any family and once I turn eighteen I don't get any support anymore,"

Damon said nothing at first. Money had never been an issue for him, he was a Salvatore after all, and his powers of persuasion meant he could get anything he wanted if he was smart about it. But she was just playing a human over and over again, with nothing to fall back on.

"Well I'm sure you'll find something," he said finally "Mystic Falls is fully of rich people, which mean nobody wants to work," he said amusedly and Y/N laughed.

"Alright Miss Y/N, you're here," Damon announced waving his hand in-front of his as if she would miss The Grill building right in-front of her.

"Thankyou so much Damon, that's twice you've helped me out now - I can't thank you enough," Y/N said sweetly, smiling up at him.

Damon swore he felt his dead heart stop.

"It's no problem - just do me a favour and don't tell my brother. He doesn't like me much,"

Y/N didn't question it as she waved goodbye to him and stepped into the restaurant to meet her friends.

Damon watched her through the window, still not wanting to tear his eyes away from her. His attention soon diverted to the bar manager coming out the store for his smoke break.

Within a flash Damon was next to him, forcing the man to look him dead in the eye as he did so.

"You are going to accept Y/N L/N into whatever job she wants, with whatever hours she requires and pay her double for working weekends," he said lowly.

Compulsion really was handy.

In the bar, Y/N was laughing with Caroline, the other two not appearing yet.

"So who's your date going to be?" Caroline asked gleefully, "I mean you don't have to have one, but you also kinda do if you want to go for Miss Mystic Falls," she added.

Y/N shrugged "I don't really know anyone Caroline, I'm quite happy just to watch and support you,"

Caroline's features softened slightly "You're so sweet," she gushed "Elena and Bonnie don't really like it, they think it's old fashioned,"

"Well it is," Y/N pointed out "But just because something is traditionally feminine doesn't mean you can't enjoy it,"

Caroline smiled "See this is why I like you, you just get it. So tell me, any cute guys caught your eyes yet?"

Y/N shook her head with a smile "Is that all that goes on through your head?" she asked.

Caroline shrugged "You'd only say that if you were deflecting!" she pointed out "Spill,"

"There isn't! I've met like, three guys since I've been here, one of the is Elena's boyfriend and the other is her ex!"

"So who's the third?" Caroline asked, her eyes widening.

Y/N blinked - she hadn't expected Caroline to catch onto that little detail. She gulped slightly, the feeling of tightness returning to her chest. Damon hadn't wanted Stefan to know about him helping her - and Caroline would surely tell him. But she also didn't want to lie.

"Oh erm...I met him on my first day. I got lost finding Bonnie's house and he helped me,"

Caroline clapped her hands together "Oh my goodness! What did he look like, was he hot? What was his name?"

Y/N laughed slightly, amused by the blonde's actions "I don't know, he was tall, dark hair. Really sweet,"

"Oh I bet it was Tyler! You know he's been staring at you all day," Caroline gushed and Y/N blinked.

"Tyler?" she questioned the name foreign on her tongue.

Caroline nodded "Yeah he's on the football team! A bit of a douche but when he likes you he's just the sweetest,"

Y/N nodded slightly, her gaze shifting round the bar "Does anyone at school work?" she asked nervously and Caroline's gaze shifted into one of sympathy.

"Yeah, Matt actually works here. And Tyler sometimes helps his dad with Mayor stuff,"

Y/N nodded, the gnawing pit in her stomach growing slightly. She hadn't even considered that people would look down on her for having a job before Damon's tone of voice told her otherwise.

"But don't worry, no one will care. A girl called Vicky used to work here, and nobody picked on her for having a job," Caroline reassured

Y/N then spotted the manager who was heading back to the bar. "Oop - there he is - wish me luck!"

"Good luck sweetie, hope you get it!"

As Y/N walked over, she mustered the courage to actually look the man in the eyes as she spoke to him, hoping that forcing herself to make eye contact would help.

"Hi," she gave a small awkward wave "I'm Y/N L/N, I was just wondering if you had any waitressing jobs going,"

The Managers eyes seem to shift a little, before he responded with a great smile on his face "Of course! Someone just left today so we have an opening. We can fit the hours around you, and you get double when you work on weekends,"

"Oh!" exclaimed Y/N, not expecting it to be that easy. In fact she was kind of upset since she had a whole speech written on how she would be a great worker. "Oh great, when can I start?" she asked.

"How about next Wednesday? Wednesdays are the quietist days, so we'll have plenty of time to show you the ropes,"

Y/N tried to hide her excitement "Great - thankyou so much!" she called over her shoulder as she practically raced back to the table.

Bonnie and Elena had arrived, sitting down in the vacant seats.

"Did you get it?" Caroline asked and Y/N nodded happily. The girls applauded her, giving her hugs and for the first time Y/N felt truly in place.

"What you can still come shopping with us right?" Elena asked worriedly and Y/N nodded,

"Yeah he said I start on Wednesday and I can pick my hours," Y/N said, taking a sip of her drink.

"Nice," Elena said approvingly "Well done Y/N,"

Y/N blushed a little "Thank Elena,"

Non of them noticed Damon, sat in the corner facing away from them, a small smile on his face.

Saturday rolled around sooner than Y/N had expected and she found herself slightly dreading it. As much as she loved her friends, they were richer than she was and whilst they would be looking at the prettiest dress, she would be looking at the price tag that came with it.

But as she entered the dress shop with her friends, all thoughts soon vanished as she laughed at Caroline's dramatics.

"I wish we could of found you a date - you would have had such a great shot at winning," Caroline said sadly but Y/N shrugged.

"I'd rather just sit and watch then have to dance with somebody I don't know," she replied.

"Well still...I'm going to try this dress on!" she announced picking up a blue number.

Elena patted Y/N shoulder "Ignore her, it doesn't really matter," she reassured. "Which one should I try on?" she then asked, holding up two almost identical dresses.

"Both of them," Y/N replied simply "We've got all day haven't we - and Bonnie why don't you try that green one over there, you'd look stunning!"

Bonnie smiled, grabbing the green dress to change.

It was then a dress in the corner corner caught Y/N's eye, it was a dusty purple, the slight jewels encrusting the top. It was beautiful.

She glanced at the tag.

Way out of her price range.

"Would you like to try it on?" The shopkeeper asked gently but Y/N shook her head.

"No it's okay, it's way out of my budget anyway,"

The shopkeeper bit her lip, "You can try it on anyways, no harm in a little dress up,"

Y/N looked at her hopefully.

"Really?"

The shopkeeper nodded with a smile and Y/N's smile brightened, as she rushed into the changing room.

The dress fit her perfectly, hugging her figure in all the right places before flaring at the bottom. The colour seemed to make her skin glow.

Too bad it was too expensive.

"Come on, let us see!" Caroline begged and Y/N sighed, opening the curtain and letting the girls squeal over it.

"Oh it fit's you perfectly!" Bonnie remarked "You need to get it,"

Y/N shook her head with a smile "And buy the first dress I try on?" she responded, not wanting to tell them that it was simply too expensive.

"See - she get's it," Caroline said with a laugh "No go change so we can try more stuff on," she pulled the curtain back over her friend.

She sighed, wriggling out of the dress with difficulty before placing it back on the hanger.

She handed it to the shopkeeper with a smile.

"It was beautiful but I just can't afford it," she said sadly.

The shopkeeper nodded understandingly "We have a sale section over there if you'd like?"

Y/N nodded, before spotting Caroline sorting through many dresses in her arms.

"Got enough there Caroline?" she asked amusedly and the blonde sighed in exasperation.

"I just don't know which one to pick, I wore blue when I won last year, but I've already worn blue," she tutted putting the blue dress back on the rails. "You found anything yet?" she asked.

Y/N thought back to the purple dress, but didn't want her friend to pity her.

"No, I might come back another day," she said softly. Or to another cheaper shop she added in her head.

"I'm starving, shall we go to the grill?" Bonnie asked.

"We go there all the time, I'm sick of chips and the smell of beer," Caroline whined. "Can't we go back the the Salvatore house, they always have great snacks,"

Elena hesitated. Her and Stefan were trying everything they could to keep Damon from doing something rash, and that meant trying to keep Y/N away from him.

"I'm actually kind of tired," Elena said, yawning. "Why don't we go to that smoothie place downtown and then we can all go home?"

That seemed to go down well with the rest of the group, and Caroline quickly bought Y/N's smoothie before the other two could notice, and before she could protest.

"Don't worry about it," she brushed off when Y/N tried to pay her back, so the girl just sipped her smoothie in peace.

When Y/N arrived home, she was utterly exhausted from the full day, and was about to collapse on the bed when she noticed a parcel on it.

She frowned, wondering who on earth would have put it there. She's been with the girls all day and Bonnie's dad was away on business.

Perhaps Elena had Stefan drop it off, or maybe Bonnie had snuck in whilst Y/N was downstairs.

She opened the box carefully and gasped.

Inside it was the same dusty purple dress she had tried on in the shop.

She gingerly took it from the box, looking everywhere for some kind of tag to say who it was from but there was nothing.

"Bonnie?" she called uncertainly, not knowing whether or not to be excited about it.

Bonnie came in, fresh out the shower and drying her hair. "You o - oh you bought it!" she gushed remarking at the dress.

But Y/N shook her head.

"No I couldn't afford it, it was just here when I got back,"

Bonnie frowned "Oh...maybe Caroline bought it for you then? You know what she's like,"

"Yeah," Y/N echoed staring at the mystery dress "Do you think I should wear it?"

Bonnie nodded "I mean it would be rude not to, and it is a beautiful dress. Besides what harm could a dress do?"

Y/N shrugged, putting the dress on the hanger and hanging it outside her wardrobe, admiring it in the light, before a tap on the window startled her.

She whirled around, only to see a crow staring at her unblinking through the glass pane.

"Oh shit," Bonnie muttered, her eyes wide "Y/N I'm just gonna make a phone call okay?" she said quickly, before practically running out of the room.

But Y/N attention was on the bird as she opened her window for it.

"You hungry?" she asked and threw the bird a bit of bread. It just stared at her some more, before flying away. She shrugged, closing the window.

Back at the Salvatore household, Elena and Stefan rounded on Damon with narrowed eyes.

"Tell me why Y/N has just received a dress that she didn't buy, but was trying on earlier today?" she asked with raised eyebrows.

Damon scoffed "I don't owe you an explanation," he said snidely.

Elena shook her head "You need to stay away from her Damon, she doesn't remember you. You're just going to end up hurting yourself,"

Damon shook his head "I didn't go near her did I? I bought her a dress that she wanted, and she doesn't even know it was me. Tell her Caroline bought it, she's always doing stuff like that,"

Stefan had so far said nothing, not even when Elena turned to him for backup. Instead he was looking at his brother with a saddened expression.

"It's okay," he finally said with a sigh "I mean, it's not like he's hurting her,"

Elena pursed her lips, not wanting to admit that she simply just didn't trust Damon around her new friend. But she had to admit, she met Damon when he was at his worst, and Y/N originally met him when he was still human.

Damon said nothing, but carried his bottle of bourbon up to his room.

"Maybe they should meet," Stefan said lowly "I mean, he's not going to kill her,"

Elena shook her head "So he can take his pain out on other people when she doesn't fall in love with him? You said so yourself, Damon's a monster - and Y/N just doesn't seem like the type to deal with that,"

Stefan stared into the fire, a thoughtful expression on his face. "What if they met here? That way we could keep an eye on Damon, make sure he doesn't do anything too rash, but at least he wouldn't be secretly trying to see her without us knowing,"

"Okay," Elena nodded, "But after the founder's ball next week, I can only focus on so many things at once,"

Y/N found herself in two minds over the founders ball. On the one hand, it was quite exciting to be getting dressed up and ready with her new found friends, but on the other hand, it was a long day to be around people.

She tried to push that thought out of her mind until Bonnie said,

"We're all having an after party at the Salvatore's, so I'll drive you there after,"

Y/N tried not to show her grimace "Do I need to bring spare clothes?" she asked and Bonnie shrugged.

"I'm pretty sure Caroline will change into another dress, but me and Elena will be going casual so it's up to you,"

Y/N then crammed a skirt and jumper into her bag, with some joggers in case it got too cold.

After Bonnie helped her tie the corset laces on her dress, the sudden restriction of breath was noticeable but not uncomfortable.

"You look stunning," Bonnie reassured, seeing the fleeting look o nerves overtake her friends face. "Now listen, I'm driving but me and Elena and Caroline all have to go upstairs because of the Miss Mystic Falls thingy, but we'll come find you as soon as we can okay?"

Y/N nodded, deciding against speaking for the fear that the nerves would make her be sick. She was nervous, and she didn't even have a part to play.

She was grateful for the three girls as they all chatted in the car, meaning that she didn't have too, and even as they left to go upstairs, Y/N gave them a small smile and wished them good luck.

Now what.

She glanced around the room, feeling suddenly very small as she realised she didn't really know anybody in there. She settled by grabbing a glass of champagne that she knew she wouldn't drink and settling in the corner, watching everyone go by in their dresses.

She watched and clapped as one by one the elected girls descended the stairs, each one getting an applause before moving to the middle of the room.

"That's a beautiful dress," Came a voice, and Y/N jumped slightly, turning towards the sound of the voice. Her demeanour relaxed slightly as she realised who it was.

"Hello Damon," she said, her smile more genuine. "And thankyou, I'm not entirely sure who got it for me, but I love it,"

Damon said nothing, but a small smile played on his lips.

"You don't look to be enjoying yourself," he acknowledged and she sighed.

"I know, I'm just...I hate crowds," she admitted "I'm so glad you're here, finally a face I recognize,"

Damon stared at her a little, the want to let all of his emotions tumble off his tongue was great, but he knew that it would be a disaster if he did so.

"You owe me a favour, Since I have rescued you what - twice now?" he asked teasingly.

Y/N rolled her eyes "Alright Mr Salvatore, what do you want?" she went along playfully.

"A dance," he replied simply, extending his hand and she laughed nervously.

"I'm a terrible dancer, I don't think I've ever even learnt!" she exclaimed but Damon's blue eyes met her wide ones and she relented a little.

"I'll lead you," he replied gently, taking her hand in his own. "Come on,"

Y/N accepted his hand, gracefully walking to the middle where more couples were now dancing with the original girls.

"This is going to be so embarrassing," she muttered, her eyes darting around as she saw that other people were watching her.

"Hey - look at me," Damon commanded, his tone soft. So she did, his blue eyes staring into her own and she felt her breath hitch slightly. There was something ever so familiar about them, like a safeness that she couldn't quite place, like somewhere she had been before but couldn't quite remember.

And they were dancing, in sync and ever so graceful, neither one of them ever breaking eye-contact with each other.

"Oh my god, is that Y/N with Damon?" Caroline ran up to Elena, horrified and Elena nodded with a grimace.

"It's complicated," Elena whispered back to her friend. "We think Y/N used to be an old friend of his - well old girlfriend - back when Damon was human. But she disappeared, and now she's back. And here's the catch - she doesn't remember any of it,"

Caroline's eyes widened "Y/N a vampire?" she whispered in shock but Elena shook her head.

"No she's cursed, every time she dies she get's born back into the same body, with no memory of the life before,"

Caroline looked at Damon, narrowing her eyes "If I didn't hate him so much I'd feel sorry for him - do you think he still loves her?"

Elena nodded with a sigh "Stefan said he never stopped looking for her after she disappeared,"

Bonnie grimaced "Can we please stop feeling sorry for Mr Killer over there, he's literally killed people Elena. We can't let him have Y/N, we both know he's end up hurting her,"

But as the trio watched Y/N and Stefan dance, even Caroline who hated Damon the most, couldn't help but admit the softness in his eyes when he looked at Y/N. Like a humanity that wasn't there before.

"You're an excellent dancer," Damon remarked, pulling her to the side after the song ended.

"I was only following you," she laughed, "Also why do all these drinks have alcohol in, what's wrong with something that actually taste nice," she said bitterly, setting down a champagne glass with a wrinkled nose.

"I'll get you something," Damon reassured "Wait here,"

Y/N didn't have chance to tell him that he didn't have to, he was already gone.

"I do hope my brother wasn't bothering you," Came the voice of Stefan Salvatore as he walked over to her.

She shook her head "No, he's actually really sweet," she said with a soft smile, glancing back to where he had gone too. "He's actually gone to get me drink since I don't like champagne,"

Stefan raised his eyebrows but didn't comment further on the matter, not daring to spoil her image of his brother.

"Where's Elena?" she asked.

"Gone to find her brother I think," Stefan glanced around to spot his girlfriend who was indeed chatting to her little brother. "I'm driving you all to the afterparty now, but I'm coming back for him because there's no room in the car,"

"I thought Bon was driving?" Y/N asked with a frown but Stefan shook his head.

"She's already drinking," he said amusedly

"No worried Brother, I'll take her," Damon had come back, standing besides Y/N and staring at his brother with an emotion Y/N couldn't quite place. "Got you some orange juice," he said, giving her a slightly smile. She thanked him.

Stefan hesitated, not wanting to start a scene, but also not having an excuse ready.

"Alright," he finally said after staring his brother back some more "We're leaving in ten minutes,"

Stefan then left, and Y/N eyed the que to the toilets with distaste. She didn't fancy waiting in the line just to get changed like many of the other girls were.

"Can we go back sooner?" Y/N asked, and Damon turned back to her with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

"And why would you want that?" he asked and Y/N's cheeks burned.

"No - I didn't mean-" she stuttered slightly before gathering her thought's and frowning at him "I just want to get changed," she said defiantly.

Damon laughed "Relax I'm just messing with you, come on before Stefan think's I'm kidnapping you,"

Y/N rolled her eyes, put picked up her skirts so they wouldn't trail on the floor, before picking up her bags that she had left in the cloakroom. Or tried to, before Damon took them from her.

"And who would I be if I let a lady carry her own bags," he asked, raising his eyebrows.

She curtseyed playfully "Well thankyou Mr Salvatore," she said mockingly, a slight blush blossoming her cheeks.

She didn't understand why, but she felt more comfortable around Damon than anyone else she had met so far, except perhaps Elena, and she had been around him the least.

But there was something utterly familiar about him.

He gave her a cocky grin before opening the car door for her.

"How long are you going to keep up this gentleman act?" she asked as he got in the drivers seat. He put a hand on his chest in mock offense.

"What makes you think it's an act?" he asked, and Y/N laughed, which was quickly followed by a yawn. "You're sure you're up for a party?" he asked.

Y/N nodded, her head resting against the window watching the scenery drive by.

"Thank-you for being so kind to me," she said, glancing at him. His fingers tightened one the wheel slightly.

"You're welcome," was all he said. As she turned away, he tried desperately not to look at her, not to wear his heart on his sleeve like she wore hers.

"Welcome to the Salvatore party," he said when he arrived "Bathrooms down the hall, go right then wa-I'll show you," he said, realising that she would probably get lost.

He then noticed the slight frown on her face "What's wrong," he asked, concerned.

She shook her head "Nothing, It just looks really familiar,"

Damon shrugged "Looks like any old museum I guess,"

She smiled at him as he opened the door to the bathroom, shutting it behind her as she entered.

"Be quick, or I'll miss you too much," he called out and smiled to himself when he heard her laugh.

In the bathroom, Y/N was quick to get dressed, the only problem being she couldn't quite reach the laced up corset and she groaned.

Stepping timidly out of the bathroom she spotted Damon who was leaning against the wall, staring into space.

"Damon?" she asked, and he turned to her with raised eyebrows. "Ca you help untie me please?"

He froze for a second as she lifted her hair, turning her back to him.

His fingers danced carefully over her skin, the temptation to hold her almost overwhelming but he cleared his throat and pushed that thought out of his head.

He carefully undid all the silk ties, letting him fall beneath his fingers. Y/N clasped the front of the dress tightly, so not to let it fall down.

"There you go," Damon said quietly, almost whispering. Y/N turned to him, almost bumping noses with how close they were.

"Thankyou," she replied softly, glancing into his blue eyes as they studied her own, before clearing her throat and returning to the bathroom to get dressed once more.

Damon leant on the wall his hands rubbing his head.

He needed to get a grip he decided.

Y/N changed into the miniskirt that Elena had leant her, with an oversized jumper that barely brushed the bottom of the skirt.

"Okay I'm all ready," she announced and Damon smiled lazily at her.

"About time, the party is about to get started." he said, leading her away and to where numerous people were already standing and Y/N felt herself shrink behind him slightly.

"Y/N!" Elena announced, grabbing her friend by the arm and leading her away from Damon with a glare to the man. Damon watched, biting the urge to follow her down.

Y/N looked back to him, looking slightly regretful and giving him a soft smile, which he raised his glass too.

"So you and Damon?" Bonnie questioned, raising her eyebrows.

Y/N felt her skin burn slightly "He's really sweet," she said quietly

Caroline screwed her nose up "But-Damon seriously? He's such a dick,"

Elena rolled her eyes "Maybe he just really likes Y/N," she said pointedly to Caroline, who pursed her lips slightly.

For the rest of the night the girls kept a close eye on Y/N, not wanting her to see Damon but also not wanting her too suspect anything. However as the night drew on, the girls got more drunk, and Y/N remained sober allowing her to slip away.

It's not that she wanted away from them in particular, but the crowds were getting far too much for her.

So she found herself wandering the halls of the Salvatore building, the vague familiarity of it making her head spin a little. Her fingers ran down the walls as she walked, feeling the old wallpaper beneath her fingers.

She came to the double doors, and something in the back of her mind was begging her to open it, so she did and gasped.

A library.

It was beautiful, with even a seating area near an old fireplace and rows and rows of books.

She marvelled at the sheer amount, before picking a random one and collapsing on the sofa that was there. It didn't take her long to get comfy, curling up against the arm, the book on her lap.

Back at the party, Damon was looking for her, the slight worry settling in his heart.

He cornered Elena, frowning at her "Where's Y/N?" he demanded "I thought you wanted to keep her safe,"

Elena looked around "I thought she went to find you," she said, the worry edging into her voice, barely audible over the slurring of her words as she danced with an empty cup in her hands.

Damon glowered at her, if it was anybody else she would have had her throat ripped out, but he stopped himself.

"Guess I'll go find her," he said sharply.

It was then the thought occurred to him that Y/N said she found the place familiar, and he was sure that apart from in 1864, she had never stepped foot in the building.

And where did she go whenever there was a party?

The library.

He almost laughed when he saw her, curled up against the arm of the sofa, a book in her lap and utterly oblivious to the world around her.

"We were worried about you," he said smoothly, trying to mask the dying worry in his voice.

Y/N looked up with wide eyes, quickly shutting the book and scrambling to her feet. "Oh God I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to intrude. It's just...you have a library in your house," she said weakly, looking embarrassed.

Damon waved her off "You're welcome to use it any time you like, the door is always open,"

Y/N smiled gratefully at him, sitting back down in the seat.

Damon watched as she read, the uncanny similarity between now and when he first met her almost to real to bare. Yet she didn't know him now, just like she didn't know him then.

But maybe she didn't need to remember him, maybe he could get her to fall in love with him a second time.

Y/N shivered slightly, even her thin jumper not quite enough to protect her from the coldness of the large house, especially since the room itself was so big.

Damon eyed her "You look exhausted, want me to take you home?" he asked sincerely.

Y/N shook her head "I can't, Bonnie has the house keys and god knows where she is,"

"You're more than welcome to stay here," Damon said softly and Y/N looked up at him in surprise.

"I wouldn't want to intrude," she declined but Damon shook his head at her.

"It's a boarding house Y/N, we have tons of spare bedrooms for exactly that reason,"

Y/N bit her lip, her eyes downcast as she considered her options. "Only if you're sure," she said finally and Damon resisted the urge to celebrate.

"Come on then sleepy, up to bed," Damon said smirking slightly, helping out of her cozy position on the sofa. She groaned softly as she felt her joints click, but the warmth of Damon's hand in her own made it all worth it.

"Do we have to go through the party?" she whispered as she exited the library.

"God no, Elena would kill me," Damon said mindlessly.

"Why?" Y/N asked curiously and Damon froze, realising what he just said.

"I can be a dick," he responded after a beat. He didn't want to go any further, unsure on what she already knew, and the fear that she would then hate him was evident.

Y/N shrugged "Well, at least you admit it," she said a smile "First step to recovery I guess,"

Damon scoffed "I do not need to recover,"

Y/N bit her lip to stop herself from laughing, which Damon noticed with a slight smile. He opened one of the doors, allowing her to step inside.

"You should find everything you need in here, there's an en-suite so you won't get lost trying to find the bathroom, and there will be some clothes you can sleep in," he said in mischievous tone, a suggestive joke on the tip of his tongue but for some reason he stopped himself before he could say it.

"Thankyou Damon, really," Y/N said sincerely, after marvelling at the room.

Damon nodded at her with a smile, before going to close the door as he left.

"Damon?" Y/N asked, and he popped his head round the door lazily, his blue eyes never leaving hers. "For what it's worth, I like you,"

Damon felt his heart leap into his chest. It wasn't a love confession, he knew that, but she liked him. She wanted to be his friend, and that was a step in the right direction.

"I like you too sleepy, now get some sleep,"

Y/N nodded with a smile, staring at the door as he closed it behind him.

Part of her wanted him to stay, but the other part was content knowing she'd see him in the morning.

#damon x reader #damon salvatore x reader #damon salvatore x female reader #damon salvatore #damon salvatore fluff #damon x female reader #tvd #tvd universe #the vampire diaries

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juustokaku · 4 months ago

Text

Confidentiality - Chapter 1. - yandere!ATEEZ OT8 x f!reader

Introduction: Joining a peer support group for mentally ill was a good idea for the last two times you were there. Then it's only natural for the third time to go well too, right?

Pairings: yandere!Hongjoong x reader, yandere!Seonghwa x reader, yandere!Yunho x reader, yandere!Yeosang x reader, yandere!San x reader, yandere!Mingi x reader, yandere!Wooyoung x reader, yandere!Jongho x reader

A/N: This is my first fan fiction I have posted in years! I'm sorry that the beginning might bore you but I'm trying to make the next chapters more interesting. This was more of an introduction than the real story. Also, please, forgive me for my English. It's not exactly immaculate since it isn't my first language. Thank you to everyone who might stumble across this and read!

Word count: 3 207

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The first time you had been shaking in your boots. The next time you had been shaking as much. And now, hopefully for the last time, you were still shaking.

“What are you doing here? This is private property,” a relatively old lady opened the door you were standing behind and furrowed her thin brows.

It was winter, and you were cold already, but the chill that ran down your spine at the woman’s words made you almost visibly shudder. Did she not remember you?

Your hands inside your mittens squeezed into fists. Anxious tears welled up in your eyes. As usual, you couldn’t handle people being angry or even stern at you.

You would have probably run away in a couple seconds, but the woman smiled at you suddenly and pushed the door wide open.

“I’m just joking, dear. I remember you.”

She was supposed to be a mental health professional but still she dared to joke like that while aware of your struggles. You felt a bit irritated but didn’t dare to show it to her. She didn’t mean to scare you.

As you stepped inside the house your anxiety levels settled down for a moment. You felt a little more comfortable despite the fusty smell. The room was designed to look inviting and homey probably to make the patients relax. It was kind of like visiting a grandma which made you feel nostalgic.

“I’m glad you decided to join again,” the woman smiled sincerely as you took off your boots and set them neatly on the shoe rack.

You nodded, “I’m a bit anxious but eager to receive some help again.”

It was the third time you had joined a peer support group for people who were suffering from mental health problems. The same woman who was in front of you had held it every time. You thought she was some kind of therapist but weren’t sure anymore. It was always hard for you to remember the introductions, because your mind was an anxious mess when meeting new people.

She led you to the familiar room where all the previous support groups had been held too.

10 armchairs were placed in a wide circle. Their colors were restrained and mild so that people who had sensory issues wouldn’t feel uncomfortable. Well, they would probably feel uncomfortable here anyways due to other reasons, but it wouldn’t feel as insufferable as it could if the chairs were all bright, neon version colors of rainbow.

The lighting was comforting and warm, a stark contrast to the cold lights of a hospital.

As you were taking in the feelings of the room, the woman started speaking.

“Uh, I have to tell you something,” she started, sounding apologetic, “All the other group members are new. None of them have been here before.”

“Oh. Are any of them aggressive?” you asked nervously.

The information that you hadn’t met any of the other patients stressed you out. What if one of them was aggressive and attacked you?

“You worry too much, Y/N. They’re as stable and gentle as little lambs.”

“If they were stable, they wouldn’t be in this group.”

The woman chuckled a bit, her dimples showing as the corners of her lips rose in amusement.

“Trust me. Everyone is kind and calm,” the woman assured you.

Suddenly a man barged in and declared, “I have arrived! Get ready for trouble!”

Your heart almost stopped and a fight-or-flight response was close to being activated. But after the initial scare he gave you settled down, you stared at the man with surprise and nervousness.

Despite his attention-demanding entrance, his looks were a little less extra. He was really handsome though. He had black hair and casual clothes but your attention was caught by his mischievous dark brown eyes and a little mole under his eye.

“What’s your name?” the man noticed your staring and rushed to you before you could run away.

You barely remembered your name when the man was suddenly in front of you, a bit too close to your liking. Somehow you managed to mutter out your name to him.

“Ah, Y/N. I’m Wooyoung,” the man introduced himself, “You have beautiful eyes.”

If you didn’t forget how to speak when Wooyoung asked your name, you definitely did now. How were you supposed to answer when a stranger complimented your eyes out of the blue?

Wooyoung continued inspecting your face and expressions intently.

“Thank you... You have very... interesting eyes as well,” you smiled sheepishly.

“That sounds almost like an insult,” Wooyoung pouted, “Aren’t my eyes beautiful too?”

Oh no. Did Wooyoung think you didn’t think of his eyes as beautiful?

“No, no! I mean yes, your eyes are beautiful. I just didn’t want to sound like a creep by complimenting you too much.”

Wooyoung grinned at you, “Don’t worry. I know what you meant.”

What was wrong with everyone, joking around like that? You had your first mini heart attack earlier when you thought the woman didn’t recognize you and now Wooyoung made you think you insulted him gravely.

You took a seat on one of the armchairs. Wooyoung sat down next to you, staying quiet but glancing at you sometimes. Pretty often, to be honest. All of the time, actually.

The woman started talking with him but you couldn’t focus on listening to their conversation at all. Just fiddling with your fingers nervously as you imagined how the other patients would be like.

One by one, all of the patients arrived. Two of them were late which irritated you. You just wanted to get this session over with already.

You didn’t dare to look at anyone but you had noticed to your horror that all of the other patients were men. Maybe they would gang up on you after this session and beat you up. That’s what men did, right? You had read a lot about those kind of things on the internet.

“Alright kiddos,” the woman started, “My name is Charlotte Abbot, and I welcome you to this peer support group.”

None of you were “kiddos” anymore but young adults. Charlotte probably just felt a lot older with all those wrinkles on her face.

She went on and on about how the group works and the importance of confidentiality. A few members of the group didn’t focus at all and were looking around curiously to see who were the people that had joined the group.

“Who wants to introduce themselves first?” Charlotte asked.

Wooyoung raised his hand and started talking before Charlotte could give him a permission, “My name is Jung Wooyoung. My favorite color is black. My favorite fruit is strawberry. I like dancing. I like taking photographs. I like cooking. I like-”

Charlotte interrupted him, “Thank you, Wooyoung. Let’s give everyone a chance to introduce themselves briefly before revealing more.”

An extraordinarily stylish man raised his hand before he started speaking.

“I’m Kim Hongjoong. I’m the CEO of my own fashion brand.”

You almost gasped out loud. No wonder he was so stylish. He looked cool both in appearance and attitude. The look on his face was so focused that you bet he was a hardworking man.

“My name is Choi San. I am a personal trainer. Nice to meet you all,” a man sitting one seat away from you introduced himself politely.

You could definitely see that he was a personal trainer. His looks probably distracted all his customers from working out to look at him.

“Jeong Yunho,” a tall man next to you smiled kindly, “I’m a police officer but I do a lot of volunteering at animal shelters as well.”

You almost let your heart melt at Yunho’s words but you reminded yourself that he could be lying to make himself look more trustworthy. He could actually be a mastermind criminal who’d lure you into his trap with his promises of playful puppies and cute kittens.

“Choi Jongho,” another man simply said.

Everyone waited for him to continue but he stayed silent.

“That’s it?” Wooyoung asked.

“Shush, Wooyoung. If Jongho doesn’t want to say anything more yet, he doesn’t have to,” Charlotte reminded gently.

“Song Mingi. But you can call me Mingi. Or Mingus Dingus,” another tall man chuckled.

“Mingus... Dingus?” Wooyoung repeated, holding back his laughter. A couple other men in the room snorted too.

Mingi looked a little offended and explained, “It’s my stage name. I’m a rapper.”

You wondered what was behind Mingi’s sunglasses. Why did he wear them inside in the first place? Was he trying to hide something else than just his eyes?

It was clear that none of them were here to hurt you. But all of these new people were making you nervous. No matter how disrespectful of you was it to suspect everyone, you couldn’t help yourself.

“My name is Park Seonghwa. I like Legos and Star Wars,” a strikingly handsome man smiled sheepishly.

His interests surprised you with their innocence. One would expect that an adult man with those godly looks would be partying and sleeping with models instead of nerding away with Legos and Star Wars. It was adorable though and made you feel ever so slightly more at ease with him.

Silence filled the room as everyone was waiting for the next person to introduce themselves. Only the ticking of the clock on the wall could be heard. The silence felt uncomfortably long and you started wondering why no-one spoke.

“Could any of you two introduce yourself?” Charlotte’s voice caught your attention.

You almost wanted to cry out of embarrassment as you realized you were one of the two who were left, and you had been just sitting there like a fool. It shouldn’t be such a big deal but your ears flushed red nonetheless.

There was a man who hadn’t introduced himself yet either. His gaze was turned to the floor. As if that wasn’t enough of a sign to tell he was uncomfortable, his body was tense and hands wrapped in front of his stomach as if to protect himself.

“I’m Y/N. I like...” you paused. Someone could be here to gather information about you or use your information against you in the future. You couldn’t tell them anything too personal.

“I like dogs,” you finally said. Damn it, that was too personal! Now that psycho police officer could lure you into a dog shelter and torture puppies in front of you just to make you suffer.

Speak of the devil, Yunho smiled at you, “I like dogs too.”

You fought the urge to scream and run away. His smile was charming but that was expected from a psychopath. Those kinds of people were good at manipulating. You had read a lot of books about it in order to protect yourself better.

Nonetheless, you still smiled back nervously.

“What’s your last name?” San asked.

To be truthful or not to be: that is the question. You had purposefully left that part out of your introduction because you didn’t want to tell them your last name. What would anyone even do with that information?

“Brokelsony,” you answered.

Wooyoung snorted, “That’s not a real name, doofus. You just made that up, didn’t you?”

You got caught. Your days were numbered now. How could you ever come back after everyone knew you lied to them?

The way your eyes widened and you clutched the arms of the chair confirmed everyone that you lied. Liar, liar, pants on fire. Except you wanted your whole body to burn, not just your pants.

“Come on, what’s your real last name?” Mingi insisted.

Wooyoung joined in with a louder voice, “Yeah, we told our last names too!”

“What are you so afraid of?”

You were stressing out, gasping for air and digging for some explanation for your lie but you couldn’t think. All the noise and pressure made you dizzy.

Suddenly Jongho chimed in, “You two chose to tell your full names out of your own will. It’s not an obligation to reveal your last name, so leave her be.”

Everyone was shocked more or less. Jongho, who had been so quiet otherwise, had spoken up and defended you.

He could have been embarrassed or regretful to have all the attention directed to him now but there were no emotions on his face. Only unwavering tranquility was like painted on his whole body.

You couldn’t have been any more grateful to Jongho for the shift of attention and for being the voice of reason. The least you could do was to send him an appreciative smile so you did that.

He did not respond to the smile.

You really hated this day. Being embarrassed wasn’t an unknown experience to you but this felt just straight up humiliating.

“Well, we have our one last patient. Would you introduce yourself?” Charlotte asked gently.

It was definitely not a nice feeling for him to be the last one and have all the attention on him, you thought as you looked at the last man left.

After a few moments he raised his gaze from the floor... only to look at his hands. At least you could see his beautiful face and birth mark a bit better now.

“Yeosang,” the man spoke.

Yeosang sounded almost apologetic like he was sorry that he was supposedly wasting everyone’s time by telling his name. You really felt for him.

“Look what you did, Y/N. He learned not to tell his last name either because of you,” Wooyoung chuckled and received a scolding look from Charlotte in response.

Charlotte looked around the room, probably taking in everyone’s names, and nodded.

“You all have different issues like all people do. Even though some of you may have similar experiences or diagnoses, don’t forget that you have your own story to share, no matter how insignificant it may seem.”

A few people nodded, acknowledging her words. You did too although you did not agree with her statement.

Your story wasn’t meant to be shared. There wasn’t even anything to share. That’s what you wanted to believe at least. That you were completely healthy and normal, and that nothing bad had ever happened to you.

“During next week we’ll start opening up more but today it’s time for something more exciting...” Charlotte smiled mysteriously, “Get into groups of three.”

What was this? A pre-school? You did not want to talk to anyone. This was supposed to be a form of therapy not a blind date!

You felt your palms sweat in nervousness. Who would you want to be in a group with? Or a better question, who would want to be in a group with you?

The stress of realizing that probably no-one would agree to be with you made your chest tighten up. You cursed Charlotte in your mind for causing this.

Every second felt excruciatingly slow but fast at the same time as you saw Hongjoong and Seonghwa already forming a group. You would be the last one left. No-one would let you into their group willingly.

“Do you want to be in my group?” someone behind you asked like an angel who descended from Heaven to save you from the fate of being left out.

Once you turned around, you froze. It was the Devil instead.

Yunho stood there, towering over you, with that smile on his handsome face again. It was suspicious how kind he was.

“Sure,” you nodded despite your head screaming at you not to. Carefully inspecting his expressions and movements, you decided he would be trustworthy enough now that there were other people in the room with you.

“Awesome! Let’s go find another groupmate,” Yunho gestured you to follow him.

So, you did follow him as he walked towards Yeosang who was standing by the wall, looking clueless and lost.

You felt grateful that Yunho had chosen Yeosang out of everyone left because he seemed like the least aggressive person there. His arms were muscular but you wanted to believe he wouldn’t use them for anything else than carrying heavy grocery bags for old ladies.

“Yeosang, do you want to join-” Yunho started but got interrupted by Jongho who had appeared behind you two.

“Y/N. Join my group.”

It was enough of a shock already to have Yunho ask you to be in his group, but now that Jongho wanted you in his group as well, you felt lost.

You probably looked stupid as you were glancing between Yunho and Jongho, trying to figure out the situation, lips slightly apart.

“No can do, dude. She’s mine... my groupmate, I mean,” Yunho crossed his arms.

Even Yeosang raised his head to look at the scene with you as Yunho and Jongho started disputing.

“Although you like dogs, you don’t have to treat her as one,” the shorter man sneered, “You’re not her owner, cop.”

Yunho furrowed his brows. You thought of him as scary even when he smiled, but now that you saw him getting irritated, you felt horrified. What if he had a gun with him? He was a police officer after all.

“I didn’t mean it that way. I just want you to find your own groupmates instead of stealing mine.”

“Why are you so keen on keeping her?” Jongho raised a brow.

“Why are you so keen on stealing her away from me?”

Yunho’s question was just the right one to make Jongho silent.

A slightly irritated expression crossed Jongho’s face but he just shrugged and said, “Don’t ask me.”

“Who else should I ask then?” Yunho asked, confusion mixed with annoyance in his voice, but he received no response as Jongho just walked away.

You watched Yunho’s expression from the side while he was still distracted by his own thoughts and emotions.

His lips were pressed together tightly and ears bright red. It was clear he tried to control himself and his reactions, but you weren’t convinced by his act at all.

You got to see him properly only when he swiftly turned around to face you. He did not touch you, thank God, but you were still terrified when you saw the look in his brown eyes. The same, usual smile was on his lips as he looked down at you but it was still vastly different. His eyes weren’t warm. His eyes were burning hot, full of fierce fire he had been hiding under the facade of a kind police officer who loved helping animals, and who knows what other lies he had come up with.

His body towered over yours as he looked at with those eyes that made you want to curl up into a small ball and defend yourself like a hedgehog.

But you weren’t a hedgehog and you couldn’t push out spikes to protect yourself as Yunho leaned closer.

“I’m glad you didn’t run off with Jongho,” he chuckled.

In the blink of an eye his expression was back to that weirdly cheerful one, as if you had imagined everything.

Everyone was horrible. You were scared and worried. But you should have expected something like this already, you thought to yourself.

After all it was just like you told Charlotte: if they were stable, they wouldn’t be in this group.

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Chapter 2. ->

Masterlist

#kpop fanfic #kpop x reader #kpop #ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez fic #jeong yunho #choi san #kim hongjoong #kang yeosang #jung wooyoung #park seonghwa #song mingi #choi jongho #kpop yandere #ateez yandere #yandere x reader

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queenshelby · 1 year ago

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The Unwilling Wife

Pairing: Dark Thomas Shelby x Virgin Reader

Warning: Arranged Marriage, Full On Non Con, Loss of Virginity, Tommy being horrible

Note: This was a request!

Growing up Gypsy, it was customary for young women like you to be married off early. But in the heart of the Midlands, amidst the smokestacks and iron foundries of Birmingham, you were to marry a man of power and influence, Thomas Shelby.

You stood at the altar, dressed in a gown that glistened like liquid moonlight under the chandelier's golden glow. Your heart pounded against your chest like a caged bird, desperate to escape. You knew not what awaited you in this new world, but fate dictated that you must submit to its cruel whims.

Standing before the officiant, you locked eyes with Thomas, his gaze cold and unyielding. "I now pronounce you husband and wife," the Gypsy man uttered, the words striking a death knell within your heart.

You turned to face Thomas, the air thick between you, heavy with tension and unspoken words.

"Come now, Love," he rasped, his voice a husky whisper that sent shivers down your spine. He had his eyes on you for the past two years, but your parents insisted that he waited until you were ready for a union of such kind.

At twenty-one, your father passed away and you were no longer given a choice. You had to marry this man to provide stability to your family.

The weight of expectations bore down upon you, making each step feel like walking through mud. You'd never known much about love, having only felt the bitter sting of betrayal. You had no idea how this man, whose eyes held a wildfire of ambition, would treat you.

Thomas led you down the aisle, his grip firm yet gentle. "We are leaving now," he asserted, his tone hardening. You nodded, feeling the weight of the gazes upon you. Your heart hammered in your chest; the fear of uncertainty consumed you. The velvety darkness of night seemed like a safe haven compared to the storm brewing inside you.

You walked away from your familiar surroundings and the chill hung in the air, mirroring the icy sensation creeping down your spine as your husband led you to his car.

He couldn't wait a minute longer to claim what now was rightfully his and you soon began to notice the urgency in his demur.

It was all too late to do anything about it now though, as your hands shook and you found yourself staring back at him, paralyzed, even as you silently wished for a way out. In those moments, you remembered how different life could have been if your choices were truly your own. Yet, here you stood - defenseless, scared, and utterly alone.

"Your new home is only a short drive from here," he said abruptly, his tone devoid of emotion.

Despite the dimness of the interior, you noticed the hardness in his jawline, the intensity burning in his eyes. It was clear to you that he desired something far more than just physical pleasure. And as his hand found the small of your back, you knew that he wanted absolute control over you.

You followed meekly, stepping into the car as he shut the door behind you. The leather seats were warm against your skin, carrying a musky scent of polished wood and cigar smoke.

Thomas clicked the button to close the doors, and your stomach twisted in knots, the fear growing stronger within you. The car started smoothly, pulling away from the parking lot, leaving your old life behind. You watched the blurred lights pass by outside, trying to grasp the reality of your situation.

"So, tell me Love," Thomas broke the silence, "What did your parents tell you about me?" he wanted to know.

"Not much," you managed to croak, swallowing the lump in your throat. The air was thick with tension, the silence pressing down on you like a vice. You fidgeted in your seat, shifting in discomfort.

"Just that you are dangerous," you finally replied honestly, trying to sound indifferent. The truth was, you barely knew anything about Thomas Shelby beyond the rumors you had heard from others. You knew he was a prominent figure in Birmingham's criminal underworld, feared and respected for his ruthlessness.

Thomas chuckled, his deep laughter echoing through the enclosed space. "Well, I suppose that's true enough, eh" he admitted, a glint of pride in his eyes. "But you have nothing to worry about Sweetheart. I'm a fair man," Thomas reassured you softly, reaching across the distance between the two front seats to stroke your arm gently. His touch was soothing, yet there was something unsettling about it.

"If you do as I say and behave like a good wife for me, I will treat you well," he murmured, his fingers tracing patterns on your wrist. "And, considering the deal I made with your mother, I have no doubt that you will learn your place fairly quickly, eh," he said.

Thomas smiled grimly, his eyes flashing dangerously under the dashboard light. You tried to nod, swallowing the lump in your throat. Your palms were sweating against the satin fabric of your dress, and your heart raced wildly in your chest. You felt trapped, suffocated, and desperately yearned for freedom.

As the car pulled up to the entrance of an imposing mansion, the engine roared to a stop. Your breath caught in your throat; you had seen pictures of this place, but seeing it in person took your breath away. The house loomed high, casting ominous shadows onto the driveway.

Thomas opened the car door for you, offering his hand as if he expected you to jump straight into his arms. You hesitated, taking a moment to gather your courage before accepting his help. As you stepped out of the vehicle, the crunch of gravel beneath your heels echoed loudly in the silent night.

Inside, the mansion was magnificent. A grand staircase dominated the entrance hall, leading up to a second floor where countless rooms branched off. Each one seemed to hold its secrets, and you wondered what lay hidden behind closed doors. Despite the luxury surrounding you, feelings of unease crept into your mind.

"Frances will show you upstairs, to your bedroom," Thomas instructed, gesturing to a petite woman standing quietly near the entrance. Frances, you noted, was much older than you and appeared to possess a calm confidence you envied.

"Thank you," you whispered timidly, grateful for the reprieve from Thomas' intimidating presence.

With the slightest tilt of her head, Frances indicated that you should follow her.

"This way, Mrs Shelby," she called out to you politely, her tone as smooth as silk.

You trailed after her obediently, your feet whispering against the plush carpet beneath them. As you ascended the grand staircase, you paused to glance upwards, marveling at the glittering crystal chandeliers hanging overhead.

Frances shot you a smile, seemingly reading your awe-struck expression. "There's plenty to explore, Miss. But let's get you settled in first, shall we?" she said. "Mr Shelby will be up soon and my understanding is that he wants to consummate your union tonight," she added delicately but firmly.

You gulped, your heartbeat accelerating as Frances guided you toward a set of double doors adorned with intricate gold detailing. "Don't fret, Miss," she continued, opening the doors to reveal a stunning bedroom filled with luxurious furnishings. "In time, you may come to appreciate the finer things in life that Mr Shelby will provide for you," she told you and you knew the price you had to pay for what she was referring to.

As such, you didn't respond, instead choosing to focus on the plush red rug beneath your feet.

Frances saw through your feigned ignorance, smiling softly. "Mr Shelby has selected some clothing for you to wear," she told you, pointing to the white satin lingerie on the bed before quietly leaving the room.

You stared at the delicate garments laid out on the bed, feeling overwhelmed and anxious. The soft fabrics were unlike anything you'd ever touched before, and the thought of wearing them made you uncomfortable. You approached the bed cautiously, picking up the lacy bra and panties with trembling hands.

"I am not going to wear this," you muttered to yourself while sitting down on the edge of the bed.

Your fingers nervously toyed with the lace trimming of the underwear. You weren't accustomed to such luxury, nor the idea of being submissive to someone else's desires. Still, you knew you had little choice or control over your circumstances.

The clock struck midnight, and you heard footsteps approaching your door. Thomas entered the room, locking it behind him. The air crackled with tension, and you shifted uncomfortably in your seat.

"May I assume that the garments I chose for you did not fit?" Thomas asked, breaking the silence and you flushed, averting your gaze.

"I did not try them on," you stammered, aware of the sudden stiffness in his posture and, unsurprisingly, your comment caused Tommy to sigh.

He stepped closer to you, towering tall over you as you remained seated, looking like a cornered fawn. His gaze swept over you once before speaking again.

"I am surprised you still hesitate," he began, running a hand through his dark hair. "I understand that you may be nervous, but I own you now. You are my wife and I expect you to do as I say," Thomas said, his voice low and steady. He reached out to caress your cheek, his touch sending a jolt of electricity up your spine. You flinched slightly, but you knew better than to pull away. This was your life now, and if you wanted to survive, you would have to play along.

"Now stand up and take off your dress," Thomas ordered, his voice hardening. You swallowed, knowing what he wanted.

You stood slowly, taking a deep breath and meeting his gaze. He appraised you coolly, a slight smirk curving his lips. You clenched your fists, hating the fact that you had no other option but to comply.

"Undress," he commanded again bluntly, watching you closely.

You hesitated for a few seconds before peeling your wedding gown off. It slithered down your body, leaving you bare underneath the flickering candlelight. You shivered, the goosebumps rising on your skin as you met his assessing eyes.

"Good girl," Tommy smirked and you could feel his eyes roam over your flesh, drinking in the sight of your naked form while you shivered fearfully under his gaze.

Your teeth gritted together, bracing yourself for the inevitable.

"Turn around," Thomas growled, his voice thick with lust. Reluctantly, you spun around, presenting your back to him.

His fingertips grazed your shoulder blades, tracing a path down your spine towards your waist. "You're beautiful Love," he said, his voice dropping to a husky whisper. "And I have been dreaming of this moment for two fucking years now," he confessed, moving closer.

You flinched when you felt his hot breath on your neck, but you bit your lip and held your ground. You could sense that he was aroused, and that knowledge made you feel nauseous.

"Please, I don't want to do this," you whispered, your voice quivering like a leaf in the wind. "I have never been with a man before," you pleaded with him as his hands roamed over your body possessively.

"And that excites me even more, knowing that I will be the first to have you," Thomas responded, his voice dripping with satisfaction. "Now, turn around again and lie down on the bed for me, legs spread," he commanded you.

You hesitated, torn between your instinctive refusal and the stark realization that resistance would only invite punishment. After a moment, you reluctantly complied with his order, turning around and climbing on to the bed, lying down slowly but keeping legs firmly together.

"Spread your legs, I said," barked Thomas, his patience clearly thinning. You looked up at him pleadingly, but his expression was resolute. With a quiet whimper, you reluctantly parted your legs. The gap between them widened, and you quickly covered your exposed sex with your hands.

"Let go of yourself," Thomas snapped, grabbing your wrists roughly and pinning them down to the mattress. "I want to see what is mine," he declared, inspecting every inch of your body with a predatory gaze.

You struggled weakly, tears pricking the corners of your eyes.

"Please," you gasped, "I can't do this -- I've never done this before!"

To your surprise, the usually stern Thomas softened, stroking your cheek with the gentleness of a lover in the throes of passion. "Shh," he soothed, "Open your legs," he told you again and, nervously, you acquiesced, allowing him to guide your limbs apart.

"That's it, Love," he praised you, stroking your inner thigh. "Beautiful," he breathed, his eyes devouring you greedily. "I've never seen anyone quite like you," he purred, leaning down to kiss the tender spot where your thigh met your hip. "You are fucking perfect," he growled before he kneeled down, upright, in between your legs so that you could do nothing else but keep your legs parted for him.

Tommy unbuckled his belt next and pushed his pants down to reveal his erection, dripping with the pre-cum, eager to penetrate you. It was monstrously swollen, pulsing, and visibly leaking. You recoiled back, feeling terrified, and disgusted. You tried to look away, but Tommy grabbed your chin, forcing you to confront it.

"You belong to me now," he declared, his voice sinister and commanding. "Your sweet little pussy belongs to me. No one else will ever have you or touch you like I do."

"Now hold still," Tommy said, maneuvering himself between your legs. He gripped your hips tightly, guiding your body into position. The rough texture of his calloused hands made you wince, but you held your tongue, refusing to give him the satisfaction of hearing your protests.

"Look at me," he demanded, his eyes boring into yours. You met his gaze warily, unable to tear your eyes away from his intense stare. His pupils dilated, reflecting the fire of desire burning within him as he aligned the head of his cock with your entrance. You tensed, feeling a wave of panic wash over you he started applying pressure that gradually increased.

"Relax," he urged as a bead of sweat trickled down your forehead, pooling at the base of your neck. The dampness was uncomfortably warm, adding to the mounting agony. You focused intensely on breathing evenly, attempting to distract yourself from the intrusion.

"I'm sorry, Love," he mumbled, his grip tightening around your thighs. "It is going to hurt, but you'll get used to it in time."

The words stung, a reminder of the brutal reality of your situation. You tried to brace yourself as Tommy continued to push, his cockhead teasing your wetness as it teetered on the brink of entry.

Your insides clenched involuntarily, resisting the violation. The muscles of your core contracted around his shaft, threatening to reject him entirely. You could almost imagine your womb recoiling within the confines of your pelvis, rejecting the foreign object invading your most sacred space.

"Relax," Tommy repeated, his voice strained but still calm. "And let me in," he growled, beginning to thrust harder, his cock slipping further into your tight passage. You bit your lip, suppressing a scream as your body stretched to accommodate him.

"That's it Love," Thomas groaned, his thrusts becoming more forceful. "Let me fuck that little hole of yours," he grunted, relishing the sensation of his member filling you.

You tried to focus on his words, willing yourself to relax and enjoy the experience. But the overwhelming sense of violation left you numb, incapable of experiencing any pleasure. Instead, you clamped tightly around him, squeezing his cock in a futile attempt to prevent it from entering deeper.

"Fuck you are tight," Tommy moaned, his eyes glazed over with lust. "I can't believe how tight you are," he hissed, his nostrils flaring as he fought to regain control.

He grasped your hips tightly, holding you in place as he attempted to plunge farther into you.

"Relax," he implored once more, his voice hoarse with desperation. "Let me push my cock all the way in to you," he snarled, plunging his cock into you with renewed vigor.

"That's it," he eventually groaned as he bottomed out against your cervix, "So tight," he panted, withdrawing partially before slamming back into you with renewed fervor.

The impact reverberated through your whole body, causing your toes to curl. You gasped, feeling helpless against his raw strength. He drove into you relentlessly, his movements building momentum with each thrust.

"My beautiful wife, you are taking my cock so well now," breathed Tommy, his voice husky with need.

You squirmed beneath him, your body racked with conflicting sensations. The pain was relentless, but somehow, the pleasurable hum of arousal grew louder, drowning out the cries of distress.

You swallowed convulsively, fighting back the tears welling up in your eyes. "No, please," you choked out, your voice cracking with desperation. "I can't handle anymore."

"I am almost done Love", Tommy whispered, burying his face in your neck.

Suddenly, you felt his thrust become shallow, and then he withdrew completely. You heaved a sigh of relief, thinking that it must finally be over. However, before you could fully exhale, Tommy flipped you onto your back and positioned himself above you.

"Oh god, please," you whimpered, struggling to escape his iron grip as he pinned your wrists down.

"Relax," he said through gritted teeth and, before you could argue, his cock slid back into you effortlessly, tearing a whimper from your throat. He fucked you mercilessly, unrelenting in his thrusts.

"I'm ready to finish inside you," Tommy groaned, his pace quickening. "And I am going to cum deep inside you, Love," he growled, his strokes becoming erratic before, with a loud groan, he buried himself deep inside you again.

"Fuck," he groaned as he began to spasm, releasing his seed in hot spurts deep inside you. You cried out in shock, your body arching uncontrollably against the invasion. The thick warmth filled you, spreading inside you until it overflowed, dribbling down your leg.

"My beautiful wife," he whispered in your ear, his breath hot and heavy as, finally, he pulled out.

You could feel his semen leaking down your thighs, a cold reminder of the act that had just transpired. The raw pain you felt was matched only by the shame and humiliation that weighed heavily upon you.

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart" he mumbled, his voice sounding sincere but distant as he handed you a handkerchief. "I promise it won't be like this every time. Like I said, you will get used to it. Once you are broken in, it will be much easier for you, eh," your husband told you and you stayed silent, staring blankly ahead as he got dressed. The remnants of his seed dripped onto the sheets below you, staining the pristine white fabric with evidence of your desecration.

"Now get some rest," Thomas gruffly instructed you, brushing aside tangles of your long dark hair and placing a gentle kiss on your forehead. He helped you scoot under the covers, positioning your body so that your legs were slightly parted. His firm hands ensured that you were tucked in properly, creating a cocoon of safety around you. "Tomorrow will be another day," he murmured, extinguishing the candles on the bedside table as he rose silently to leave.

"Goodnight, Love," he said softly, closing the door behind him, leaving you alone in the darkness.

Tags: @ietss@thorins-queen-of-erebor@cilliansbabe@calmingmelody96@lavender-haze-01@febris-amatoria@cursedalchemist @too-manyfandoms-help @sena-m @forgottenpeakywriter

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praisethegabs · 6 months ago

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REQUIEM FOR A DREAM

leon s. kennedy x reader

synopsis: life found death, knowing they couldn't be together. life wasn't ready to give up, so he craved desperately for something human: love.

warnings: small drabble, an AU to let you guys know i'm still alive. mostly fluff.

word count: 663

a/n: small one shot to compensate all the time i was absent from here. love y'all ❤️

He doesn’t remember exactly when he was born or how long it’s been. Maybe since the Earth’s first day? Perhaps he was there at the creation? Who knows? It’s been a very long time, and he’s sure he’s old enough to remember how he ended up here.

Of all the names he has, his favorite is Leon. He doesn’t know why, but it suits him, and he likes it.

His touch is like gold. Whatever he touches, he can bring to life because he *is* life. He creates things, giving them their first breath. At first, he enjoyed being responsible for such an important job, but Leon felt something was missing.

He loved observing human life progressing in its own way. But after so many centuries alone, he started to feel bored. He had the power to create life, but it wasn’t enough. He felt a void inside his chest, craving something he couldn’t understand. Deep down, he wanted to experience love. He wanted to be loved.

He wanted to be human.

Everything changed when Leon discovered he wasn’t alone. And you weren’t exactly like him; you were his opposite. While Leon was life, surrounded by light, you were death and the darkness that followed. While he created, you ended.

The moment his eyes met yours, it was instant. But there was a huge problem: you two couldn’t be together because life was the beginning, and death was the final destination. With a feeling he couldn’t understand, he knew he needed to let you go.

But Leon wasn’t ready to give up. He started creating things just for you. The symbolism of his gifts made you fall in love with him, even though you both knew it was impossible. At first, you felt guilty for accepting his gifts, but he wanted to show you he didn’t care. They were yours because he loved you, and if this was the only way to be with you, then he wouldn’t mind doing it until the end of time.

Every time he sent you a gift, he imagined how it would feel to touch you, to feel you against his fingertips, to taste your lips. Maybe this was the human experience he had always longed for.

The feeling became so intense that you two couldn’t stand being apart; you hated the fact that you couldn’t touch him. How could you love something without being able to feel it? Why couldn’t the two of you have what humans had?

One day, however, something happened.

Seeing the two of you suffer, the Universe itself decided to bless you and Leon. There was a specific day in the year when you two could actually be together. The first time Leon touched you, he froze. He never expected you to be so soft, so kind. And when your lips met, it was like everything else made sense.

When you both tasted each other for the first time, it felt like the universe could explode. But that night, unfortunately, had to end, and when the day arrived, you had to be apart again.

One day wasn’t enough because you both had the overwhelming need to be together, and this could bring imbalance to the universe itself. It could cause the destruction of everything. For many ages, you only had one day with him, and there was nothing you or he could do.

But it wasn’t enough. You both wanted more.

Upon seeing this pain, the Universe decided to bless the two of you again. This time, however, was completely different. One day, you were no longer surrounded by darkness. Your touch no longer brought death.

You were alive, just like him. You were human. You had given up your immortality to live a human life with him. Leon was willing to give up his own immortality to be with you, and the fact that you two would someday die didn’t scare him.

He had you, and that was all that mattered.

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lemonmaid · 5 months ago

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"I wanna be next to you".

Prequel to this. This was a long time coming 💕💕💕 A/N: let me tell you how much I was struggling with a timeline because some JJK characters do not have official birthdates. I wanted Toji to be a young adult but a teen for like "This is why it's important". But then I found out Gojo and Geto would be two of reader! Were five so that's the age gap. Reader is technically three years older than the two. Idk this is just fanfiction and I'm probably overthinking this.

Warnings: a lot of angst,, sorry :p. Omegaverse fucked up timelines. Teen parent technically. Bullying (but it's a five year old, just push them??). Non curse au! Gender neutral reader! Platonic Toji!

You remember how your older cousin, Toji was thrown out for presenting as an omega.

You were around five at the time, your parents took Toji in. It was such a controversy at the time but you didn't care, you were just upset at a new smell being in your room.

Back then, omega protection laws were non-existent. This was before The Great Sleep.

"Get out of my room!" You tried slamming your door but Toji's hand grabbed the door.

"Auntie said we had to SHARE, you little brat".

Your face scrunched up in tears, "NO! I don't your stinky scent in my room!".

Toji pushed the door open, "Come here you brat!!!". You screech, trying to flee the room.

A knock interrupted the two, and Toji stared at (Name). "Stay here, I'll get the door".

(Name) stuck out their tongue, ,"I hope it's the police to take you away" they mumbled.

...

Toji opened the door carefully, letting the chain stay locked, "yes?".

At the door stood two paramedics, chaos in the background. "Sorry for disturbing you sir. We are making rounds around the neighborhood-".

The other spoke up, "If you have an omegan family member, don't let them out".

Toji looked at the second one with disgust, "Excuse you?".

"There is a sickness- it's only killing omegan gender. Do not leave this apartment, don't let anyone in".

Toji unlocked the chain, opening the door with such force. "What the hell do you mean-".

The other paramedic finally spoke up, "Listen, we are just relying on the message- the CDC-".

(Name) came up behind Toji, pulling the teen's jacket, "Toji, where're my parents".

The paramedics said their goodbyes and moved on to the next door. Toji shut the door, speed walking towards the living room to turn on the news.

"Toji-".

"Not now pup-".

(Name) felt tears in their eyes, their lips wobbling.

Two weeks later, Toji and (Name) were living on their own. The news channel always stayed on, Toji watching the developments, the rise of omega deaths across the world. This disease was only spreading towards omegas.

Some people were already conspiring that this was a government population control, but if it was, why is everyone freaking out?.

"Toji, I'm bored-".

"Go play with your toys".

"I already did that today".

"Do your homework".

"I don't have any homework! I'm five!".

"Go check to see if we were left any food at the door".

(Name) huffed before pushing a chair to the locked door, and looking out the peephole. "Nothing!". (Name) climbed down and went to sit by Toji.

"Where did you get that scar?".

"I fell".

"On your face?".

Toji was silent, he was like a brick wall. (Name) didn't understand how Toji was an omega, omegas are supposed to be nice and sweet, well that's what their grandpa said.

"Did my dam or sire call yet?".

Toji sighed before pulling (Name) into his side. "No".

"Oh... do you think they are okay?".

"Yeah".

Another week went by. After quarantine for a month now, Toji decided to start turning off the TV during the day.

He knew he shouldn't doomwatch something in front of a kid who was already scared of a dark hallway.

"Ew! Rice again!".

"Yes, now hush and eat!". Toji fussed over (Name)'s hair.

(Name) pulled away, "I want fruit!".

Toji' huffed, "Stop moving, no pup related to me is gonna walk around with matted hair!".

"It hurts!".

"Yeah because you don't brush it!".

"I still want fruit".

Toji let out a long sigh, "We get what we get, the government is nice enough to give us extra rations because of my second gender and because you're a snot nose pup".

"Nuh uh!".

"Yeah huh!". Toji made a face at (Name) before going back to their hair.

One month later.

"Come on, I'm not always going to be able to help you do your schoolwork". Toji mumbled before doing his schoolwork. School was supposed to start but with the disease still spreading, they decided to just have schoolwork delivered every morning along with rations.

(Name) let their tears fall to the paper, "I don't understand!".

Toji looked over at the paper, feeling something burst in his brain, "it is asking how many apples you have after giving Yuri five".

(Name) held up their fingers, "I- I- I don't know!".

"If you.... have eight apples... and you give Yuri five how many do you have left over?".

"1..2.."

"No- count down from eight-".

(Name) let out a cry, "I can't!!".

Toji smiled down at (Name), "Do you wanna trade?"

(Name) nodded before giving Toji their paper, then looking down and seeing a graph labeled a, b, and X. Before letting out a loud cry.

3 months later.

Toji left the TV on all day, his leg shaking while watching the television.

(Name) tries to ignore the tapping, "do you wanna play Candyland?".

"No".

"Oh...".

(Name) tried paying attention to the TV but they didn't understand what the adults were saying. They knew what laws ment, dammy said it is something you can't break without getting in trouble. So with that context that means the adults talking about laws.

"Toji?"

"Yes pup?".

"What are they talking about?".

"Adult business".

"But I'll be an adult soon, that makes it my business".

Toji snorted, "they are basically... giving omegas-".

"You're an omega".

Toji bit his cheek, "yeah... us more.... protections".

Toji watched the screen it was almost like a prayer too late. A laughable one really. It was a national protection for omegas, due to the disease killing more than one third of omegas on earth. They were basically a special class, a class of royalty some news anchors were calling it.

'How pathetic' is what stayed in Toji's mind. He couldn't think how their second genders already prevent them from harming omegas intentionally but the fact that some people have to be told now and make it a punishable sentence for harming a omega is just laughable. The system failed him for being an omega and now the system is begging for him?

All Toji could think about is his damn grandfather calling, begging for Toji to return to the family. Because now omegas were worth more than an alpha child. How laughable.

Appernlty the found a cure for the spreading disease, now some people are blaming heat suppressants on the disease , way to send society back another 20 years.

.....

Toji looked down at (Name), his arms crossed, "Okay. Again do you have your backpack?".

(Name) spun around flaring their new yellow schoolbag, "yep!!".

"Do you have your hat?".

"Checked!".

"Lunchbox?".

(Name) looked puzzled for a secound before rushing to the fridge, a small "got it" could be heard in the kitchen.

"Come on, we are going to be late".

Toji was fidgeting with the collar of his school uniform, "damn things are always too tight". (Name) followed right behind him, trying to step in his steps. Toji stopped walking causing (Name) to crash into him. A small oof was heard.

Toji rolled his eyes, "Stop screwing around we are here".

(Name)'s eye lit up at the scene of a playground, "can I go play toji?!".

"You gotta get to your homeroom first"

"Okay okay!" (Name) tried to run off, before Toji grabbed their collar. "Let me walk you to your homeroom"

The homeroom was to colorful for Toji's eyes, he grabbed (Name)'s backpack and put it in their assigned cubby. "Now (Name) what did I say what to do after school is over?".

"Ummmm wait in the playground?".

"Yes and?".

"No talking to strangers!"

"Good, I'll try and get out of school fast as I can, do not move. Hear me?".( Name) nodded before hugging Toji's legs.

...

"Zenin (Name)?" .

(Name) put their hand up, "here!".

The teacher nodded, before moing onto the other roll call.

Looking around the room, the classroom had alot and I mean alot of butterflies all over the wall. The first grade classroom felt kinda baby-ish to (Name) but what they were really fixated on was the colorful plastic bears that were sitting in a Tupperware. It was calling to (Name). So as soon first recess came by (Name) rushed to the bin grabbing the big box with their small arms and made their claim on the box.

Name started lining up the bears by color then by size, then by color again.

"Can I play?" A small voice asked.

(Name) looked up from the floor and made eye contact with a black haired girl, "ummm yeah! You can have thiiiisss much". (Name) gave half of the bears to the girl.

"Thanks! My name is Utahime!". The girl sat right next to (Name) . (Name) looked over at what Utahime was doing, "what are you doing?".

"They are a family see! That's the sire, their pup and the dam-"

A kid snatched the small bear our of Utahime's hand, "hey! Give that back!!".

"Why should i". The kid glared at Utahime, his pink hair was the only thing that stood out to (Name), besides his ugly face-.

A boy who looked just like the bully was behind him, pulling the bully's arm, "Come on suki- just drop it!".

"There are no more dammy's there all dead!".

The classroom went quiet, all the other pups staring at what Suki said.

(Name)'s lip quivered, "No, Toji said that... my dammy is just missin'. They'll be back-".

Some of the other kids started to cry, the scent of the pups that usually smelt like warm milk immediately soiled into sour milk causing all adults in the building to immediately investigate the scent.

Toji got called to the office in the middle of class. "Family emergency" they said, turned out that (Name) was in the office and waiting on the phone.

"Listen, pup, you can't call me whenever-".

Their sniffles over the phone made Toji's omega ache, "he- he- said that- my dammy is dead!".

Toji clutched the phone, his heart dropped, "Listen to me (Name), don't listen-".

"I just want my dammy Toji!".

...

'Damn it!' Toji clutched his now empty suppressant box, his last one he bought before the outbreak.

He hasn't had his heat since he presented, which like all omegas happened when he was sixteen.

He couldn't just buy a new box, suppressants were place on immediate temporary ban untill they find the "contaminated batch" that started the outbreak last year. Sighing before exiting the bathroom and grabbing the phone on the wall.

"What are you doing?".

"Calling us both out of school"

"Why?".

Toji put the phone up to his ear, "Adult stuff".

(Name) bit their pencil, they were gonna finish their homework but now they are distracted with Toji talking on the phone.

The following days, Toji was clingy to (Name), constantly holding the pup to feeding them like a baby. (Name) tried hiding in their room but was pulled out of their room and dragged into the livingroom where Toji had blankets all over the couch.

"Toji".

The older omega hummed.

"You remind me of my dammy... they used to do the same thing what you're doing when my sire was away. Is it an omega thingy?".

Toji hummed in agreement.

"Toji?".

He hummed again.

"Promise to not leave me like they did".

He was quiet.

...

Toji didn't want (Name) to be aware of how bad it has been, let the kid be a kid. The day (Name)'s parents left the house, was the day locked down happen. (Name)'s parents called Toji every night, asking how their pup was. Toji could hear the sickness in their voices. He was losing two aunties, but (name) was looking two parents. (Name)'s parents left enough money to cover rent and some groceries for the next year but it wasn't enough for them to keep living in the nice apartment.

The day Toji got a red letter on the door, he knew he had to do something. Toji dropped out of school, even when he only had to finish that year. He needed to provide, his own omega was telling him to survive for the pup. The day he got his sketchy job from an old friend is the day he saw someone he never wanted to see ever again.

"I see you've kept yourself well".

Toji's heart was in his throat, he felt like he was gonna vomit. He was getting odd looks because of his scent souring but the reaction is normal when you are your own grandfather who kicked you out of your own pack.

"Oh come on, where is the formality?".

"Leave".

"I'm sorry?".

"I don't want you here.... in my life-".

"I'm not worried about you".

"Why are you here then?".

"That... pup you have in your care".

Toji felt his omega growl at him, his instincts telling him to run home and make sure that (Name) was okay.

"Let's walk".

Toji followed behind the shorter alpha, as they walked, Toji felt the hairs on his neck on the rise.

"I'll cut this short, the pup needs to be raised with their family".

"I am their family".

The alpha growled, "the law may now protect you, but you have no support. Listen I'm not here to fight but the clan is worried about the pup believe or not".

It was silent.

The alpha sighed, "Listen Toji, what I am trying to say is can you provide them structure? Can you give them a pack life where they'll understand what happens in a pack?".

Toji knew he was right in a way, he is a highschool drop out taking care of his five turning six year old cousin.

"What I am trying to tell you Toji is that, don't rob them of that. They deserve a family".

The alpha left, leaving a small note card with a phone number.

...

"Where are we going?".

(Name) saw how Toji was urgently packing their clothing and they took note of how quiet Toji was during this whole ordeal

"Toji".

Toji sighed before falling to his knees, he put his hands on (Name)'s shoulder. "Listen... pup".

The front door opened, letting three betas in and an older alpha.

(Name) looked at the four nervously, "Toji who are they?".

Toji bit his cheek, "they... they are gonna take you to our pack".

(Name) looked at Toji with wide eye, "You're coming right?".

Toji couldn't look at them.

"Toji! Dont let them take me!". (Name) wrapped their arms around Toji's neck. Toji hesitated taking their arms away, but carried them into one of the beta's arm.

(Name) cried and screamed, "you promised! You promised!".

(Name) cried for Toji as they were taken away. The older alpha stayed behind, enjoying Toji's shame. "Well... since the government is now giving families 14,08450.00 yen per every omegan that presents, here is your share... I hope you enjoy it". The older alpha snickers before leaving the apartment, leaving Toji alone.

#jjk omegaverse #child reader #omega toji #jjk x reader platonic

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chaoticcollectivenightmare · 6 months ago

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🟦My Homelander Headcanons [V1]🟦

Picture from: @redchikittymeow ! Spoilers to The Boys Show (1,2,3,4)

✰ I think Homelander doesn't like his hair to be long now and always keeps it short. His long hair always reminds him of his time in the bad room and his teenage years.

✰ But as a teenager he liked his long hair because he could always play with it when he was nervous or bored. It was the only distraction he had between experiments and so on.

✰ Whenever he sees a camera he automatically smiles because that's how he's trained. Even when he's angry or whatever. When he notices he's being filmed he immediately calms down and smiles at the camera.

✰ He has multiple personality disorder. His two main personalities are John and Homelander.

✰ He can't swim. The scientists never taught him because he couldn't leave the lab and as an adult he never had any desire to learn to swim.

✰ That's why he hardly ever performs with the Deep alone, just for that reason and many others. And when he and the Deep do, they are never at sea or near water.

✰ He’s insecure. He has many different things to be insecure and he is afraid to admit it and if someone finds out they will be killed immediately.

✰ He sometimes has nightmares about Madelyn Stillwell, Stormfront, Queen Maeve, Soldier Boy and sometimes even Starlight and Ryan.

✰ With Madelyn Stillwell Nightmares, I think he would dream that he had used her but could have actually changed the ending. That he shouldn't have killed Madelyn and should have entered into a relationship with her that wasn't just sexual. That he might even have been a father to her son if it had turned out differently. That she might not be afraid of him if they were in a relationship. And then he remembered in the dreams that he was an asshole and had killed her.

✰ In Stormfront Nightmares he would definitely dream of a "normal healthy" relationship with her and the American lifestyle. That they would get married, have children and grow old together and then he would be hit by reality. She was a n*zi, she had committed suicide, she was just using him and then he would remember her condition after Ryan had hurt her and everything bad about the relationship.

✰ In Queen Maeve Nightmares he dreams of how he saw this relationship in his eyes and just loves it. He had the perfect relationship with Maeve but then suddenly Elena would come and take her away and then Homelander would be alone and beg Queen Maeve to come back to him but then he realized the reality. She hated him. She never loved him.

✰ In Soldier Boy Nightmares he dreams of growing up as his son and that Soldier Boy was proud of him and stood in the spotlight with him. Everything would be perfect until the dream goes black and he wakes up again and he fights with Soldier Boy and Soldier Boy lets out his hatred on him. He yells at him and fights until Homelander is bloody and then he grabs him by the collar and strangles him and Homelander says with tears in his eyes.

"Please don't Dad….. I'm scared"

"You're not my son, you just a scared Pussy"

Soldier Boy then said full of hatred and the dream ends there.

✰ With Starlight Nightmares it would be that he dreams that Starlight wins or that he is replaced by her. These nightmares don't happen often but when they do happen they are really graphic and show his fear of losing or being replaced.

✰ Ryan's Nightmares are like Starlight Nightmares but I add a dream type where Ryan is very afraid of Homelander in these dreams and doesn't see him as his dad, so it's a reversed Soldier Boy Nightmare because Soldier Boy doesn't see him as his son and Ryan doesn't see him as his father in the nightmares.

✰ And he has general nightmares about the bad room and so on.

✰ He has actually always been afraid of sleeping since he was born because he is paranoid and because of his nightmares.

✰ If he has the chance, he would never like to sleep alone and tries to have someone nearby.

✰ I headcanon that Ryan's bedroom was very close to Homelander's bedroom because when Homelander wakes up from a nightmare, he gets confirmation from his X-Ray that Ryan is okay and that he is sleeping. He always tries to calm himself down by doing this.

That's all that came to mind right now. Maybe I'll make a V2 or if you want you can message me for headcanons for the boys.

#the boys #homelander #the boys tv #homelander x male reader #homelander x reader #homelander headcanons #homelander x you #x reader #the boys series #the boys amazon

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whimsiwitchy · 7 months ago

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I hear the secrets that you keep (series)

chapter two: life isn’t real

Pedro Pascal x F!reader

series masterlist

series summary: 24 year old y/n is an insecure and struggling actress in Los Angeles until she finally books a leading role in a big Hollywood movie next to her leading male, Pedro Pascal. A spark of friendship flickers between the two and slowly begins to blossom into something more. As y/n is navigating a new found fame and a new found romance, she fears that a lie she has been sitting on might ruin everything.

Warnings: plus size reader (no specific description of reader, slight descriptions of weight: stomach fat, stretch marks, etc.), hefty age gap (24 years/14 years), female anatomy description, she/her pronouns, use of gendered terms (girl, girly, etc.), y/n used, descriptions of nudity, swearing, use of the word fat, warnings may change as the story progresses.

authors note: Hi everyone. Thank you so much to those who read and liked chapter one. I was so excited logging in and seeing the engagement. This chapter might be a little boring as we are leading up to actually filming the movie, the pace should be picking up soon! I hope you enjoy chapter two! <3

chapter summary: y/n processes everything and prepares to start production.

╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗

“Oh shit..”

You felt like you couldn’t breathe. It felt as if your spirit had jumped out of your body and watched as you received the news of your life changing forever. You were frozen. You could hear Angie speaking on the other line but all you could do is stand there and cry tears of joy and bewilderment. When you finally came to your senses, you caught the end of Angie telling you she was coming over. The two of you partied and celebrated all night long. You were on a high of life.

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

It had been a few weeks since the audition and the excitement slowly died down. Fear started to replace that feeling of excitement with all of your insecurities plummeting to the front end of your brain like an avalanche. You knew fear wouldn’t be a stranger on this journey and it first accompanied you when Angie asked if you had shared the good news with your family yet. When you told her you hadn’t said anything to them, she asked why. You simply told her that you wanted to enjoy the moment for yourself before celebrating with everyone else. She accepted that answer and the two of you went about your day, but deep down you knew that wasn’t the truth.

The truth was that you were scared. Terrified that all of this would go away in the blink of an eye. That the casting director had made a mistake. Maybe there was another y/n that auditioned and got the part. Maybe they realized that you weren’t good enough or even decided to rethink their options. They did make a decision pretty quickly. Usually it took weeks to hear back from casting, not four measly hours. You weren’t someone who often doubted their talent. You did however often doubt how someone may perceive you. You knew you were a capable actress, but you saw the other women auditioning. They were gorgeous. Perfect smiles, perfect style, and most importantly, they were skinny.

You had always been an insecure person when it came to your body. You became hyper aware of your weight at a heartbreakingly young age. For as long as you could remember, you had been sucking your stomach in and comparing yourself to other girls constantly. You had always believed that you were a pretty person and you had some confidence, but it all seemed to wither away once you grasped the concept that other people might not see all the great qualities and beauty you held behind the weight. You knew that being a plus size actress was possible, but being a plus size leading love interest alongside one of hollywood's hottest bachelors was different than just playing the fat funny friend. You were scared of what people would say about you and filming hadn’t even started yet

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

Before you knew it, a whole month had passed and life went back to normal. You were sitting on your couch watching Twilight for the thousandth time and eating hot cheetos when you heard a knock. You stood up, licked the cheeto dust off of your fingers and made your way to the door. You stood on your toes looking through the peephole to see that it was Angie. The two of you gave each other a quick greeting and made your way to the couch. Once you guys sat down, she pulled out a large manilla envelope from her bag and held it out towards you.

“Is that what I think it is?” you asked with a hint of excitement in your voice and a smile. She doesn’t say anything, she simply gives a warm smile and passes you the envelope. You take it and can immediately feel the slight heaviness it holds. You stare down at the envelope that has your name written in black marker. “What are you waiting for? Open it!” She practically screams. You slowly open the envelope pulling back each of the metal prongs and peeling back the top flap. You reach your hand in and pull out a thick packet. Setting the envelope to the side, your eyes begin to well up with tears. Inside the envelope held the script. On the front it read “Risky Disco” in big bold letters. You can’t help but laugh as a tear falls down your face. “I’m so proud of you y/n. You finally did it, this is your big moment! I can’t believe I’m the best friend of a movie star!!” Angie jokes as she gives you a tight hug. You cry into her shoulder as she holds you.

Once you composed yourself, the two of you caught up while eating some take out. After eating, Angie begged you to read through the script. The writing was just as cringy as the title. The movie was literally just a guy time traveling, roller skating, and getting it on with a bunch of women. What a shocker. It wasn’t until half way through when your character showed up.

Janet Cromwell.

“Janet is a sexy name, you’re gonna look so hot in this movie.” Angie says with a giggle.

“If I get to wear gogo boots, I’ll be oozing sexy, just you wait.” Both of you laugh and continue to read. Angie was dramatically reciting the lines of Daniel Mendez, my character’s “boy toy” as described in the brief character description. She stops abruptly and her eyes go wide. You give her a questioning look. “Oh my fucking god! I was right! You get to be sexed up by Pedro Pascal!” She says as she folds over into fits of laughter. You yank the script out of her hand and look for what she was talking about. Your cheeks heat up with embarrassment as you read over the description of a very passionate sex scene that you had to perform with the very man you’ve been trying to get your mind off of since you left the audition room.

When Angie brought up that he was the main character in the movie, you honestly didn’t know much about him. You had heard his name in passing and had most likely seen him in a show or film at some point in your life, but it wasn’t a name that you could put to a face, even if it were a life or death situation. When you got home after the audition, you whipped out your phone and did a little research. You looked at picture after picture, he was such a beautiful man and just as Angie said, he was indeed pushing 50. That didn’t stop the fact that you thought he was sexy as hell. You couldn’t get the way he smirked at you out of your head.

“You know, you were right. He is pretty hot.” You smirked and leaned back into the couch, setting the script down on the coffee table in the process. Angie shot up from her hunched over position.“I told you he was! What picture did it for you because I personally love th-” You cut her off before she could continue rambling on. “I didn’t see a picture of him.” She looked at you with a puzzled face. “Oh well did you watch one of his movies or something because I can also tell you which one of those made me-"

"He’s who I read lines with at the audition.” You said calmly. Angie stopped speaking and just stared at you, giving you a few slow blinds before speaking again. “WHAT?!?!?” You laugh at her reaction and cover your face as you blush remembering how you felt during the reading. “Why wouldn’t you tell me that? I have so many questions. Was he even hotter in person? Did he smell good? Oh my god…did you shake his hand? Did you get to touch that god of a man? Were his hands soft?” You waited until she was done rambling to tell her all about the encounter.

“Well I might have shook his hand when I first walked into the room. I told you I was nervous and just introduced myself to everyone at the table. I think I blacked out a little at that point to be honest.” She’s giving you all of her attention as you continue. “ I just did what I needed to do and it felt good. When they asked me to read lines, he just kind of appeared. I really don’t remember him being there before that point.” You reminisce the moment you looked at him.“He caught me so off guard. His eyes were so intense.” You pause for a brief second. “Ang…I’ve never felt like that before. Like I had all of his attention, like there was no one else in the room with us.” You looked back up at Angie. She was wearing a soft smile. “You better get ready girlie pop. You’re gonna have to see that man shirtless in all of his glory. You’ll have to kiss him and caress his manly chest-” Your face heats up and you smack her arm before she can continue on about what you might have to do with Pedro.

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

You’re getting ready for bed when you get a notification. You reached over to grab your phone and saw that Angie had sent you an email. You gasp as you read the subject line.

“Risky Disco Filming Schedule- Fleeting Productions”

You fumble to open the email as quickly as you can. “Holy shit..” You whisper as you read over your schedule for the next few months. First up was a table read with the entire cast, one week from today. Followed by costume fittings, dance rehearsals, roller skate call, dress rehearsals and intimacy coaching. Your eyes linger on the last one a little longer than the rest. You skim over the rest of the schedule that is filled with various filming dates. Your scenes are being filmed sporadically, giving you time in between to lock in your lines and prepare to be in the presence of a curtain man.

You were really excited for the table read. They were always so much fun. Everyone gets to showcase their interpretation of their characters early on and as time goes on, you get to see the progression of those characters. You already had an idea of how you would go about playing Janet, but it will ultimately depend on how Pedro plays Daniel and what the director wants.

Shit. In one week you’ll be face to face with Pedro again and instead of running a few lines together, you’ll be reading about 30 minutes worth of dialogue. If the table read goes in the same direction the audition did, you’re fucked. You just hope you can avoid him outside of reading lines for as long as possible. You really don’t want to embarrass yourself…

╚══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╝

Thank you for reading <3

next chapter

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chrstigx · 4 days ago

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‘Do I wanna know?’ - Pt.1

a/n: hey guys! so i decided to post this in two parts, one where reader is in her teen years, the next where reader is an adult. I did this so that you guys weren’t reading too many words at once and getting bored. The first part of the fic IS happy.. at first. I would like to point out, there is a lot of internalized homophobia and lgbtq topics in this fic as well as a lot of angst. the grammar may be eh, so just let me know. i also made up a few things for it to make sense to the story.

warnings: none (i don’t think??)

words: 2.1k

——————————————————

Larissa Weems.

Your first love.

The name ran through your head for years, even after the break-up. The break-up that you caused. You had taken her heart and shattered it and at the time and being around seventeen years old while still attending Nevermore academy, you thought that it was a good idea. That you were doing yourself and her a favor.

How wrong you were.

You admittedly always had a hard time coming to terms with being a lesbian. It started at a young age, around thirteen years old. You could remember your friends always sitting with you at the lunch table and asking who you had a crush on, to which you would look around the lunchroom until you found a boy who seemed to be ‘attractive enough’, even if you never found him attractive. This unfortunate cycle continued into your teen years and even when you met Larissa in your early adult years. In the back of your mind, you always wondered two things, one, why couldn’t you seem to love men? Why didn’t they stand out to you like women did? And two, how could anyone even like men? These thoughts were always at a constant battle with each other, making you feel like you were crazy.

It all started in your first year of highschool. You were transferred from an average American highschool to an academy in the middle of nowhere that was twelve hours away from home. Your parents sent you away when your ‘unique’ abilities had become too out of control for anyone to handle.

At first, you felt betrayed, heartbroken, as if nobody would ever appreciate all of you. The good and bad. You mostly kept to yourself in school, rarely talking to other students and teachers, barely even participating in class unless you absolutely had to. You quickly became the laughing stock of the school for being a weirdo and outcast. You were clumsy, awkward and scared of literally any confrontation which unfortunately made you the perfect target for bullying and isolation. It was sort of ironic that you were outcasted in a school full of literal outcasts. It made you almost laugh. Almost.

Larissa was the first person who genuinely seemed like they wanted to talk to you. It all started when you were switched from your dorm in Adira Hall (which you had all to yourself), over to Ophelia Hall due to spacing issues. You couldn’t have a dorm all to yourself forever, right? You were escorted to the dorm by the principal at the time, dragging your bags almost pathetically before stopping in front of the room you’d be staying most likely for the rest of your Nevermore days.

Upon entering, there was a large colorful stained glass window which had an amazing view of the campus garden, followed by two sides of the room, one being decorated and organized, the other only having a bed, a chair and a desk with a barely working desk lamp attached to it. How homey. You obviously took the undecorated side, assuming that the decorated side already belonged to your new roommate. Your ‘future best friend’ as the principal liked to call it, to try and cheer you up.

After setting down your bags and listening to the principal explaining the rules of respecting the dorm campus (even though you had already heard them at least twenty times before), a young girl around your age with the prettiest blue eyes that you had ever seen, paired with long, curly platinum hair stumbled into the room. She seemed to be out of breath, as if she ran over to Ophelia Hall from across campus.

You stared blankly at her for a moment before she straightened up and walked over to you, holding out her hand and immediately starting to rant. “Hello! You must be Y/N!! I'm Larissa Weems, it’s a pleasure to meet you!! I can't believe I have a new roomie….” Her words slowly faded out as you slowly and hesitantly took her hand, giving it a weak shake and you would just stare at her while she continued to talk for the next two or three minutes before finally stopping and chuckling awkwardly. “Sorry, I talk a lot.. dang it..!!” she would chastise herself and you would just chuckle very quietly… and awkwardly, “It's fine.. Larissa, right? I'm Y/N.. as you know. Obviously. Uhm- I’m glad we're roomies?” You’d state, almost as if you were unsure of yourself.

Feeling the room shift into an uncomfortable awkward silence, Larissa would try to ease the awkwardness by walking over to her bed, picking up a moon shaped stuffed plushie, walking back over and placing it right into your hands. You would inspect it, flipping it in all different angles in your hands before looking at her with a raised eyebrow. You could see the nerves in her face so with a soft, mumbled ‘thanks’, you would toss it onto your bed. Your first decoration.

After Larissa gave you an in-depth tour of the whole school, it was time for dinner. She would lead you to the mess hall where everyone in all of the grades seemed to gather along with the professors and the principal to keep an eye out for any trouble makers. The whole scene made your stomach turn and instinctively, you moved closer to Larissa while waiting in line to receive your tray with whatever dinner slop they were serving tonight.

Unable to soothe your nerves, you would tap Larissa on the shoulder to which she would quickly spin around, a smile that seemed almost too wide to be real plastered on her lips and you would pause for a second before clearing your throat. “I think I am gonna grab my dinner and go back to my dorm.. I don’t like it here.” You would say with an awkward shuffle of your feet as you slowly progressed in the lunch line. Her expression would falter a fraction and you could’ve sworn you had seen a hint of softness in her eyes before she snapped out of it again. “Well- that’s fine.. But I'm coming with you!” She would declare with a determination you couldn’t really say no to.

Back in your dorm, you were both sitting on the plush rug in the middle of the room. After a few minutes of eating in awkward silence, stealing a few glances every so often, you would decide to speak up. “So.. I know you had a roommate before me. What even happened?” and the silence after was crushing. With a reluctant sigh, Larissa would place down the plastic fork on her tray before looking at you. “Morticia Frump was her name. We had a falling out after she basically stole the guy I had a crush on and left me in the dust, so we both requested for room change since we couldn’t even stand looking at each other. Since then, we have held this animosity toward each other and every chance she gets, she rubs it in my face that she took Gomez from me.” Your eyes would widen at the raw hurt in her voice and you would feel your expression soften sympathetically as you reached out to touch her hand. She would flinch at first before resting her hand against yours and you two would make eye contact. “I promise that I won't… steal your man and be a bitch?” You would promise, elicited a chuckle from the both of you. Maybe having a roomie was what you needed after all to make everything feel okay in this school.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Since then, months had passed and you were both well into your school year now. It was getting closer and closer to prom time, both of you growing more and more excited. The theme this year was Midnight Garden. After weeks and weeks of dress shopping, you had opted for a deep maroon dress with the sleeves hanging off the shoulder while Lairssa chose a deep sea blue dress with no sleeves at all. Now the only mission was to find your dates.. Except, you wanted your date to be Larissa, but you weren’t even sure if she was into you like that– if she even was into women at all. After getting some coaching from a few of your mutual friends, 1. You found out that Larissa was bisexual, which was great for you and 2. You made a huge poster to ask her to prom, you just had to hope she’d say yes and also have the courage to not run away when she walked out and saw it.

Now, you were waiting in your dorm, awkwardly holding a poster up with the word, ‘PROM?’ spelled in rose petals because she loved roses and the theme was Midnight Garden. You thought it was creative, your friends thought it was cheesy but you didnt care what they thought, only Larissa. After a few hushed whispers, the door would be pushed open with a soft creak, revealing Larissa and id smile nervously and shyly, holding up the sign for her to see, “Larissa, will you go to prom with me??” You would ask nervously, the silence deafening before she squealed a loud and excited “Yes, I'll go to prom with you!!” and you could feel a huge weight being lifted off of your shoulders when you let out a big sigh of relief. When she walked over, you both hugged as you placed the poster down and before you could react, Larissa was cupping your face and leaning down, giving you a soft and tender kiss, full of love, and after the initial shock passed, you would kiss back. Your friends would all squeal in the background though you were more focused on Larissa than anyone or anything else.

The months leading up to prom were magical, full of love and passion between you, until the dreadful night directly two weeks before prom. You were on the phone with your parents discussing your time at Nevermore and you accidentally told them about yourself and Larissa being together. Big mistake. Your parents were definitely not the friendliest toward people who were a part of the LBGTQ community so when they found out, they immediately scheduled you to come home. To stop attending Nevermore and to never speak to Larissa again. Your heart had shattered into a million pieces at this, the fact you had to leave everything and everyone behind, your friends, your school, the love of your life, gone.

That same night, you dragged your suitcase out of the closet that you had barely touched since you first met Larissa. The sight of the suitcase made you sick to your stomach. Each drawer that was emptied was another crack in the damn that was threatening to burst, threatening to just make you spiral into a mental breakdown, until you saw the plushie Larissas had gifted you when you first arrived. Without even thinking twice, you grabbed the moon shaped plush and shoved it under your clothes in your suitcase. At least you would have something to ‘comfort’ you back home. Soon you would be looking at the three suitcase you had brought, all packed and zipped up. The sight made you want to crawl into a hole and never come out and the worst part hadn’t even happened yet.

You still had to tell Larissa.

Larissa would enter the dorm, seeing you standing there in front of your suitcases. Her heart dropped into her stomach as she quickly approached you with quick steps. “Y/N, what's going on?” She would ask, reaching up to cup your face, though you’d push her hand away and when you did, it felt like your heart had just been ripped out of your chest and stabbed with a dagger. “Don’t touch me.” You would practically hiss, venom dripping in your words, causing Larissa to recoil a step or two back. You would compose yourself, looking at the floor as you let out a shaky breath. “I’m leaving you, Larissa. I.. I found someone better. A man. What we are isn’t right. I am leaving Nevermore for good in two days.” You would say, each word shakier than the last and you could see the way Larissa’s expression fell, her face going pale. “Y/N, you can’t be serious.. Say this a lie, say it now Y/N!!” She would practically yell in your face. The room fell into a heavy silence, the silence feeling like a huge weight just crushed you. You would simply turn your back to her. This isn’t how you wanted it to end, you never even wanted it to end, but it was either this or your parents most likely beating the ever living hell out of you and more likely than not, disowning you. “Goodbye, Larissa.” You would say as you dragged your now packed bags out of the dorm. Silence.

You and Larissa’s heart’s shattered and torn.

@barbarasstar @milfsloverblog @gwenstulip @snakeskins-world

#gwendoline christie #larissa weems #fanfic #larissa x reader #larissa weems x reader #angst #actress #wednesday netflix #lesbian

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sunandflame · 1 year ago

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Flame and Water, Chapter 12

Ship & Trope: Kyojuro x Fem!Reader (Water Pillars Tsuguko) / Slowburn

Warnings: canon-typical violence / fluff / mention of trauma and fire

Word Count: 1880 Words

pinterest board of Flame and Water

crossposted on AO3

Masterlist of Flame and Water

The old lady's statements opened many questions for Kyojuro. Even when he said goodbye to her, he brooded over her words, but came to no conclusion. He was confused and a little hurt. Didn't you two trust each other that day so you kept something that important from him? Why were you hiding it? He thought that you were both close friends. He couldn't answer the question and would ask you about it later when you were feeling better. First, he had to talk to his father. He needed to know what had happened back then.

He entered the room where his father spent the most of his time and didn’t see him lying on his futon for the first time in years. Usually, he was either drinking and laying sideways while reading in that book but now he sat on the engawa, and his eyes were staring into the distance. Respectful as Kyojuro was, he sat down on the tatami mat to keep a distance and just as he was about to open his mouth, Shinjuro interrupted him.

"Is your girlfriend okay?"

Kyojuro had not expected this question. She was not his girlfriend. In general, he hadn't expected his father to ask about anyone's wellbeing, but it looked like he was sober. "Yes, she's unconscious, but-"

"And her burns?"

Kyojuro's eyes widened at this statement, and it hit him like a slap. Even his father knew that crucial detail about you. His gaze dropped as he clenched his fists on his knees. "The old lady next door treated her. She said she will be fine and should wake up in the next hour or so. She also told me that Y/N has several old burns. Something you seem to know about, father."

Shinjuro turned his head sideways to give him a silent look, before he turned ahead again and sighed. "15 years ago, there was a fire demon who attacked a village. His eye bore the sign Lower Rank One. A powerful opponent who managed to spread a firestorm and turned countless people into demons. It was something I had never seen in my lifetime as a slayer."

Kyojuro swallowed and listened to his father's words. Lower Moon One? He remembered the fight he had against Lower Moon Two to become a Hashira and how he had terrorized a whole city with his bombs.

Shinjuro continued. "Your girlfriend looked at me the same way back then, full of fear and terror. Unfortunately, she witnessed how I beheaded her parents while protecting her. They had been turned into demons who wanted to eat their own daughter. I was able to decapitate the Lower Moon One… but at what cost? There was no one left to save. He had killed everyone without exception or turned them into demons which forced me to kill them all. Only she survived, but she ran away from me like I was the monster… I found her buried under a heap of rubble and wounded with the worst burns I have ever seen on a human being. Her chances of survival were slim and yet I wanted to save at least one person in this tragedy. The scale of the catastrophe was great, the village burned beyond recognition of its existence. Just as she bore her scars from it, I too have one from this fiery hell."

Shinjuro turned his foot around so Kyojuro could see the burned soles. "The demon slayer uniform protected me, the tabi socks didn't and yet I wished that I would be the one who's skin burned and not that of a little child. I can understand if she doesn't want to talk about it. It must have traumatized her badly. Even I-"

Suddenly a stifled sob sounded behind the shoji door. Father and son immediately turned their heads and knew that you had been listening to them the whole time behind the thin paper walls.

You had woken up alone and scared in a room with a headache. A penetrating herbal smell immediately hit your nose. An earlier memory from your childhood had come alive again and you knew immediately that you were covered with a burn ointment. A similar one that they used on you as a child. One quick look under your hakama and you saw the reddened skin. Your leg couldn't get any uglier than it already is, you thought dryly. You stepped out of the room and looked around for Kyojuro and couldn't see him until you heard his voice.

You stood there petrified and listened to the complete story of Shinjuro and your village. So that's why your memories were patchy without even knowing. There was simply no one left to tell you about it because they were all dead and your parents- Your breath caught and the memory of them coming at you with contorted faces came back with a bang. They- they tried to eat you! You hadn't even noticed how the tears flowed down your cheeks when a choked sob escaped you and you immediately covered your mouth with your hand. You looked in the direction of the shoji door in fear and hurried away with quick steps. You didn't want to be seen by them - not in this state - and entered the first room that you saw.

You dropped to the ground and cried uncontrollably. A heavy burden seemed to have been lifted from your shoulders and the unrestrained grief over the death of your family and friends overcame you. You finally knew the complete truth without knowing you were living a lie. You were not alone because you were avoided, but because you were brutally robbed of every person you ever knew.

With your head on your knees, you succumbed to your grief when you suddenly felt a presence next to you. You looked up with tear-stained eyes right into golden-red hues. Kyojuro's gaze contained no pity and yet they were filled with sadness and empathy for you. "Y/N..." He took your hand in his and pulled you up. "You are not alone in this. I won't allow that, so share your pain with me." If Kyojuro could, he would take all your pain to never see you cry again.

More tears gathered in your eyes until you couldn't see anything anymore. "K-Kyojuro-" With a sob, you threw yourself into his arms. He immediately wrapped his arms around you tightly, holding you in a fierce embrace.

You cried into the crook of his neck. It took a while for you to calm down, but that didn't matter, Kyojuro was here to hold you. His tight warm hug, it was like he gathered all the broken and burned pieces and made you whole again. Without realizing you nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck and took in his scent which sent you into a light buzz. His scent was warm like the ray of sunshine with an earthy undertone. It was so comforting for your senses that you wanted to nuzzle your nose more until you realized what you were about to do, but you didn't pull immediately away. Kyojuro’s grip on your yukata was so tight, his face buried also into your neck. It seemed like as he didn’t want let go of you, like he had to make sure you were still whole.

It took a while for the two of you to loosen your grip on each other. Very slowly you moved your heads apart but only to look deep into each other's eyes. Still in his embrace, you gazed into his beautiful golden red hues, which always radiated such a passionate optimism, but now seemed to have a gleam you had never seen in him before. A pleasant tingling spread through you, and you felt the looming tension between you. Without realizing your faces came closer until your lips met.

It was soft and chaste, fleeting - the touch of his lips hotter than you thought in the short moment you kissed. The butterflies in your stomach fluttered excitedly when you saw a hint of blush on his cheeks.

"I- apologize!"

"For what?"

"For touching you in such an inappropriate way!" His face was now completely red, and you could not help but start to giggle.

"I think it’s called a kiss, Kyojuro."

Mesmerized, he stared at your lips while you giggled. "Yeah, and I think I am going to do it again..."

He was about to bend down to give you another kiss when you quickly placed your finger on his lips. "W-Wait! What if someone just barges in here?" You looked around with a slight panic.

You heard his deep chuckle. "That is not going to happen, since this is my room."

“Oh,” was the only thing that left your lips. You looked around wide-eyed and indeed, it looked like it belonged to him. You just went into the next available room in such a hurry that you didn't even notice it, but on closer inspection it was obvious. It included the usual things a room needed. A futon to sleep, a chest of drawers and a picture of his family. But there was one thing- no two things that stood out. One was a small chest that seemed to hold writing stuff and the other was a hanging scroll where "protection" was written in a calligraphy. It was above his futon. The origin didn’t seem to be himself.

“Do you like it?”

You nodded and started to blush madly when you realized how intimate this situation actually was. You were here alone in Kyojuro’s room as the said man was still holding you.

He laughed his boisterous laugh, and you felt his laughter vibrate all over your body. Your blush was just so adorable that he couldn’t hold himself back and kissed your cheek. Another silent moment passed between you when you just looked into each other's eyes and then he suddenly shouted. “Y/N!” His face was red like a tomato. “I love you and I would be happy if you could become my girlfriend!”

His confession was bold and like a burning fire. He literally was the Flame Pillar as a slayer and in his private time. You smiled as you pulled him in for another kiss, holding his face in your hands. It was not a long and passionate kiss as this was the first one you ever shared in your life, that was followed by several others. Each of them was short and soft, feather light like the butterflies that were fluttering in your stomach. Each kiss had him sigh in delight, between each kiss you whispered how you loved him too, how much you wanted to be his, until you rested your head on his chest with closed eyes, and heard the strong and steady beat of his heart. You heard how excited he was that the feeling was mutual.

He noticed your exhaustion of the day and laid down on his futon, pulling you close in a comfortable and comforting embrace. You nuzzled your face into his chest, the symbol of protection over both of your heads, and you indeed felt protected for the first time in your life in the embrace of a Flame.

🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥🌊 🔥

Big thanks to my lovely friend @desi-the-blue-eyed-kakushi for beta reading and editing❤️) As some might have realized that the story is close to the end. Chapter 13 will be the last and then there comes an epilog. I hope you will stay tuned till the epilog. And again I am open for discussions and critique. All likes, reblogs and replies are highly appreciated!

Taglist:

@krillfromsky @kingmultiverse404 @deepressed @nelissecrectplace @yomoya-girl @theycallmemrsbarnes @roninishere @beelzmunchkin @kyojurismo @stuckinthewrongworld @lynnw @love-me-satoru @felix99999l @noarawriteszr @strawberrymm @rye-flower @demonslayeranimex @kittenssss-blog-blog @hanatsuki-hime @kxthxrinx3180 @thatw3ird0 @lovely-nayiq @annie-napier @cole-silas @inonezu-808 @witchy-scribblings @drowsydoggy @anjox @xkanrojimitsurix @ahashiraswife @mamayan @flametrashira

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howdoesagrapewrites · 2 years ago

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𝐏𝐮𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐲𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

Cw: I'll use the canon ages for this piece, but this is not the case for all my work, gender neutral reader, may be kinda masc aligned, pre-atsv movie, no proofread, fluff, found family?

Hobie Brown x hispanic!punk!reader & Gwen Stacy (platonic)

It was the early morning, specks of not-so-warm sun would creep to your face and wake you up, Hobie was laying beside you, you didn't try to wake him up, you might as well try to wake up a rock. Hobie was a much heavier sleeper since his spidey senses kicked in, relaxing now that he had a clearer notion of danger, however, your spider senses did the opposite, leaving you alert at all times. You stretched, like a cat, groaning as you sensed the sleep wash off your body and put on sweatpants to go into the kitchen, you'd probably return to bed after eating, it had been almost a month since you were home. Almost a month listening to Miguel tell you that your mission was to "observe and report" an anomaly that may or may not happen. Almost a month of wanting to call off Miguel on his bullshit, for one, having the lamest most half-assed theory of what's "canon" and two, for giving you a boring job away from home.

As you set foot in your kitchen, you saw an unfamiliar figure, you put on a battle stance, who was this person? Why didn't your spidey senses warned you? Were you that tired? You examined how to proceed, the intruder seemed rather small, but you've seen some shit in the spider society and know that age or even species should not be a reason to underestimate your opponent, they were standing still next to the open pantry, they heard you, you run to them in an offensive stance, ready to fight, but she backs down, panics, and apologizes, you feel like a brick was comedically thrown your way as you realize you were about to throw hands with a sixteen year old.

"Ay, mija, I'm sorry-" you blurt out when she explains Hobie let her stay here, and she was also part of the spider society

"Do you think I can eat something? There's a lot of jars in here but I don't know what are they" she asked, still hesitantly

"Yeah, we have yogurt, fruit, granola, eggs"

Gwen accepted the granola, she had thought that Hobie would live off instant ramen or anything of that sorts. As you quietly shared breakfast with (a tense) Gwen, Hobie came into the living room and threw a shirt your way, you were very grateful as you were topless because you couldn't find you pajama shirt this morning (later saw Gwen was wearing it).

Hobie yawned loudly and opened his eyes widely remembering he forgot to introduce you two

"aye crap- forgot you were back, y/n, this' Gwen, 'been letting her crash for a few days"

You side eyed him, playfully feigning an angry expression before eating another bite of breakfast and ignoring him

Your guest saw this interaction and started stimming a bit

"Mornin' Hobie, I- I'm sure I can crash at Peter's or someone else's place tomorrow now that Y/N came back, thank you for letting me stay here" she tried to seem unbothered but it didn't really work

"No, no, I don't mind you staying here, I was just annoyed that this moron Hobie didn't told me and let me scare you this morning, you really can stay as long as you need"

Hobie hugged you from behind and kissed your cheek "no need to get aggressive, luv"

Gwen Stacy had went through a lot. A lot. Losing her best friend, a rather... Difficult relationship with her father, being technically a wanted criminal, but on top of that and more, Gwen was homeless, literally and emotionally.

She saw how some spiders were able to live a let's call it "normal" life, Peter B. Parker being a father, Hobie Brown having a stable relationship, Jessica Drew with a baby on the way, but there were others, Miguel, Peni, and maybe, her, Gwen really thought that she was one of those spidermans that had to fly solo, fight alone, after Peter's passing, she was sure she didn't want "distractions", but then Miles came along, and now he was lost too.

She was grateful for both you and Hobie housing her, and looking out for her, and even if she didn't want to admit it, you gave her a home again. The playful banter, the food waiting for them at home after a concert, your smile in the crowd cheering for both of them, the nicknames, the sleepovers with Pavitr, she had friends again, you and Hobie took the role of older siblings to her and Pav, even when Hobie was a force of chaos, he never badly endangered any of his loved ones.

Gwen was a little shy to admit how natural the domestic dynamic felt, like now, with her accompanying you to get "groceries", you talked the whole way walking across the grafitti filled streets, until getting to an abandoned building, not that she wasn't acquaintanced with crusty old sketchy buildings already (living with you two) but this was no supermarket.

"It doesn't look like there's groceries in here" she said with a quirked brow

"Just you wait" you responded as the door was opened and you said hi to the people inside, she waved back to the strangers that seemed to welcome you two, it was an odd crowd, but weren't all crowds odd? People of all ages, ranging from infants playing, to elders in battle jackets with antifa imagery. There were large windows that let the sun light up the place, this was probably a mansion in its glory days, multiple pots with different herbs and flowers were hanged in the walls, and a big open gate that showed the garden, with a small chicken coop and full of colorful and lively crops of vegetables and fruit trees.

"Ready to shop?" You asked with a toothy smile

"What?" Gwen followed you to the garden

You handed her a basket "Take what you'll eat, I'll get mine and Hobie's food"

"Like... Just take it?"

"Yep, take what you'll need, no more, no less, if you want eggs, they're inside, trust me, you don't want to get in that coop, el gallo is a fucking menace"

She took some fruits and other goods, you handed a lady another basket and then left with Gwen

"Did we just got all this for free?" The blonde asked staring at the basket full of food and ingredients

"Not really, I made a basket of pan de pascua and a pot of ropa vieja"

"Oh, so is like a trade, that makes more sense"

"I mean, if you ain't got nothing you can still take, you can also help around the garden and stuff. You see, Gwen, you can't be an anarchist if you don't give a shit about the people around you, the people in need. In a world like this, kindness is revolutionary."

Maybe Gwen was starting to understand a lot more than her canon had prepared for her.

#hobie brown #hobie brown x reader #hobie brown x you #atsv x reader #hobart brown x reader #Hobie Brown headcanons

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opticfile · 2 years ago

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𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐧𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝

✧ super long wait i know :( i ended up rewriting the entire think 2k words in </3 i hope its worth it i didn't expect to get 500 votes in that poll!!

—✦ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 // you were childhood friends with Alhaitham, but what went wrong along the way? after you having a falling out and move away, you reunite in adulthood and conflicting feelings envelop your life

—✦ 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 // Alhaitham

—✦ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 // use of she/her pronouns, parental issues, divorce, unrequited love, weak attempt at angst, jealousy, alcohol, alhaitham being a jerk

5.9k words

You were seven when you met Alhaitham.

You stuck out your hand to him with a wide grin, bandages over your knees and bruises littering your shins from playing a little too rough. You were bright-eyed and excited to meet a new friend.

Alhaitham was different.

You didn’t know what to think of him. Perhaps the word for it is reserved, but in your little seven-year-old mind you just thought he was plain weird. He tilted his head at you and analyzed you before returning the handshake, and maybe he didn't know what to think of you either. You were only befriending him because he looked lonely reading that silly-looking book of his, you were doing him a favor.

“I’m Y/n!”

“I’m Alhaitham.” He furrowed his brows, “You’re a bit loud.”

You huffed, “I’m just me.”

He seemed to like your answer, and little eight-year-old Alhaitham smiled just the slightest bit.

“Well, then I guess that’s good.”

“Yup! So do you wanna play?” You rocked on your feet.

“I’m busy.” He gestured to his book.

“But books are boring,” You scrunched your nose, “we can play hide and seek instead.”

“...Okay, sure.”

You were hooked. Your interest was piqued and all of a sudden this weird boy was fascinating to you, you wanted to know everything about him. You trailed behind him and giggled at the things he said when he sounded funny and asked him stacks of questions that made him sigh. You were irreversibly obsessed with the boy.

You followed him around when he was on walks and dragged him along with you when he wasn’t. Alhaitham let you, too, he tolerated your noisiness and enjoyed your silliness, and was happy with it. You were thick as thieves, you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“I’m taller than you, ya know.” You snickered, using your hand to measure your height but maybe your hand was a little unstable and made you think you were 4 inches taller than you were.

“What? No way, I’m definitely taller.” Alhaitham did his best to look down on you, or at least as far down as someone can look on a person the same height as them.

“Nuh-uh!” You said, “I bet I’m faster too!”

You raced Alhaitham and you don't remember who won. But you do remember the way you laid down in the grass and your chest heaved, and the way that sweat beaded at Alhaitham’s hairline as he grinned at you. Maybe another silly argument ensued about who won, a childish one that had no right or wrong, just the contrary nature of two kids being kids.

You remember poking around in rivers and little caves—the ones you were always too scared to go into but would shout into and listen for the echo—with him by your side. Perhaps he wasn’t the same as you, or maybe your interests didn't quite align, but that kind of thing doesn’t stop kids from being kids together. So while he read his books and pondered the biggest question a child can comprehend, you played in the mud and made bracelets out of flowers.

That year, you brought Alhaitham to your home for dinner one night. You had made this mud pie in the river and it was getting late, you asked him if he wanted to come eat at your house, and he nodded without hesitation. You ran up the path to your father who was sitting on the steps outside your house and handed him your mud pie with a smile, and he beamed down at you.

“Aren’t you quite the baker?” Your father kissed your hairline.

“Yup!”

“Who’s this little boy?” Your mother asked warmly, leaning the broom she was using against the house.

“He’s my friend! His name is Alhaitham.” You sat on the stairs by your father.

“Hello.” Alhaitham smiled shyly, “It’s nice to meet you.”

You remember that day and perhaps it's the memory that’s most sunbathed and joy-covered and dear to your heart.

You were ten when playing in the mud turned into something else.

It’s turned into making little cups out of the wild clay you found in the rivers near your home. You were an artist, and you know how Sumeru sees artists. Your mother supported you, she enjoyed you bringing her your little sun-dried pots and plates and she thought it was the cutest thing.

To your father, your little hobby seemed to be losing its charm. Were you really serious about this? Why were you spending your time doing something like this? Maybe he tried to hide it but maybe he also failed, because even if his words are kind, his face is not. Even if it’s past your bedtime that doesn’t always mean you’re asleep. Even if your door is closed doesn’t mean words don’t echo.

“Why can't she be more like Alhaitham? So naturally intelligent and he barely has to study…” He sighed, “We should’ve been harder on her from the start.”

Your mother pleaded with him, that you’re just ten. But your father only retorted cruelly.

“I will not have my daughter be a failure.”

You sniffled into your little nightgown while you hid in your closet and tears rolled down your eyes and you wondered if you could be more like him, you could gain your father’s praise and love. But in your little brain, you hated Alhaitham for stealing away the love your father would extend when you were little, but such conflicting feelings of affection and resentment are hard for a child to process, and you didn’t know what to make of it.

In the morning when you woke up your eyes were puffy and dry, your stuffed animal had fallen into the crack between your bed and the wall and you wondered if your father was still home. You peeked out of your door and were greeted by a quiet house and your mother drinking tea at the dinner table. Had she always looked this tired?

You were ten and a half when you started to copy him.

Everything he did, you imitated. Everything he said, you questioned him on. You just wanted to know and understand because you wanted to make your parents proud, what little kid wouldn't? But maybe your questions weren't as intelligent as you thought they sounded and maybe common sense and rational thinking could've answered your questions.

But you saw the world in color and art and not numbers and letters, how do you understand a world you do not see?

Yet you tried—and Alhaitham could tell.

He wasn’t sure if he was proud of you for advancing into intellectual spaces, or if he was tired of being your guide. Sometimes you’d peek over his shoulder at his book and he wondered if you could read the pages—you could, your father taught you how—and when he realized you could he waited a little longer to turn the pages. But slowing himself down to accommodate you was unpleasant. Alhaitham firmly believes in the pursuit of knowledge, yet he also believes in worrying about himself before he worries about others. And yet Alhaitham could not simply focus on himself when he was worrying about you.

He tried to push down the disdain because you were his friend. Three years strong, why should he let this dampen it?

(but his feelings and irritation only built and it was only a matter of time before you would notice it in the way he acted)

“Hey, ‘Haitham.” You chirped, “Can I borrow some of your books?”

“Maybe, which ones?” He looked over at you.

“I dunno, good ones. Maybe some that will make me smarter!”

He smiled, “Sure, but only if you promise you’ll take care of them.”

You tried to, really.

You had held them with care the first day you got them and turned the pages slowly so you wouldn't rip them. You made sure that no liquids would be around when you were reading so you didn’t spill anything on the pages. Your eyes traced the loops of the letters and you burned the facts into your head.

But on day two you accidentally ripped the corner of pg 54 and splashed some of your drink on pg 67. No amount of patting dry or rubbing clean would lift the stain, you only managed to lift the top layer of paper and make this uneven circle of damp, pink, peeling paper. You were afraid of the fact you broke your promise and afraid of how Alhaitham may react.

When you returned the books which now each had their own imperfections due to your clumsiness, you felt that sting in your nose that you feel when you’re about to cry. The look in Alhaithams eyes—that disappointment he didn’t know what to do with—was hurting your heart.

“It’s… It’s fine.”

You wonder if he was trying to be kind at that moment.

You were thirteen when your father smashed your dreams.

You made a vase for your mother, you painted it and put flowers in it and she put it in the dining table. But your father was a hard man, inside and out, and the vase wasn’t. The hardened clay proved to be softer than your father’s anger. Your heart wailed and you sobbed into your mother's shoulder as she soothed you, rubbing circles into your back.

“I think you should work towards academics like Alhaitham.” She whispered, “I will help you study.”

What could you do when your only talent was of no use to anyone around you?

Perhaps not even your closest friend is able to be charmed by your talents, maybe that's why he was looking at you with such disinterest. It seemed that your childishness was no longer something he can smile at, maybe it's because he’s fourteen and he thinks he’s too cool to play hide and seek with you now, but you couldn’t help but think no, something else is going on.

Yet every time you were with him, you noticed the way Alhaithams hair framed his face and the way his brows knit together when he was focused. You watched his hands as he flipped the pages. You brushed your pencil over your paper in the shape of his face and you tucked it away because it's your little secret and your crush will die out soon enough.

But every time you were with him you also realized how much smarter he was than you and how much you hated it. You saw the way he had changed and you wondered if you were changing too and if this was going to be good for your friendship or bad for your feelings.

You still resented him because your father liked him more. But then you looked in his eyes and you saw why.

Maybe you liked him more too.

You remember sneaking out of your room a few nights later, after another one of your parent’s fights, and wobbling over to Alhaitham’s. You tapped on his window relentlessly until his drapes were pulled back and he was left scowling down at you. You smiled in return.

Alhaitham opened his window, “What are you doing here at this hour?”

“I can’t- I can’t sleep.” You pouted, “You know how that is.”

“I might end up knowing if you keep me awake like this.” He rubbed his eyes.

“Can you come out?”

“Y/n-”

“Just for a bit, I need to tire out I guess.”

He looked at you with a severely irritated facial expression, taking a deep breath before admitting defeat. He turned from the window and threw on a shirt—you only realized he was shirtless when he stepped back, and perhaps it was more embarrassment than respect that made you turn your eyes away. Alhaitham climbed out of his bedroom window and shot you a glare, you were troubling him so and for no good reason.

Still, he entertained you. Maybe he did like you more than he thought, or at least cared about you to an extent. He thought of you as this annoying distraction, and yet he was letting you distract him in the middle of the night because he just felt kind of bad. It's unnatural, really.

“Do you think that-” You looked up—up—at him, “-we move or the sky moves?”

“What?” He looked down—down—at you, “Are you a philosopher now?”

“I’m just bored and you’re not talking.” You pouted.

“Sorry,” He looked away, “I just don't have much to say at this hour.”

Do you not have much to say at this hour? Or do you not have much to say to me?

“It’s fine.”

And you sat in silence. And the contrast between then and just a few years before made you cringe.

You were fifteen when you and Alhaitham stopped hanging out as much.

The decline between you and Alhaitham was a slow, painful one. It matched the decline of your and your father’s relationship, and his and your mother’s too. It seemed like every happy relationship in your life was fading into something sad and lonely.

He snapped at you for the first time, you think he was a bit harsh, really. But you only blamed yourself because he’s right, you’ve probably been clingy and annoying. You latched onto him for comfort and ignored the way he scowled at you and groaned. You didn't want to accept the fact he doesn’t like you anymore because you still really liked him, you admired him in every way.

“Y/n- Y/n, can you stop following me around like a lost puppy?”

“What? I’m just-”

“You’re just being annoying.”

“...How could you say that to me?” You frowned.

“Because you won't listen to anything else.”

The last time you saw him, you were sixteen.

Your parents separated and you moved away with your mother, you never really saw Alhaitham again after that. Maybe it was a good thing since after that day it was just awkward and uncomfortable. Part of you wonders if Alhaitham ever felt bad or thought of you. You imagined one of those classic rom-com moments. He found out you were moving away and had so much regret and guilt in his heart that he ran through the rain and mud to catch you before you left. Running up and waving his arms to get your attention before you left for good, and you would run to him and hug him and he’d apologize and-

And none of that happened.

So you tried to focus on yourself and your life and doing what you wanted to do with it. You pretended to be over him and never even mentioned his name out loud, and after a year or two you found new friends and people to hang out with. People who were like you, who enjoyed you, and who you matured with.

But your forever-teenage heart was still broken, and your sniffles echoed through the house to your mother, and she had to come into your room gently and hold you in her arms. Your mother ran her fingers through your hair, comforting you in the only way she knew how.

“I know that I shouldn’t be hung up on him-” You hiccupped, “-he was a complete dick to me but I just… I still love him, Mom, it hurts.”

She let you stain her shirt with your tears and snot.

“It’s okay, I know…” She hushed you, “It’s normal to feel this way, it’ll get better though, I promise.”

“But what if it doesn't? What if it doesn’t go away?”

“It’ll be okay. Just trust me.”

You hated having to move away from her, she was your rock and she stabilized you. But you left and ended up in Sumeru City, and that’s when you met Kaveh.

You giggled at his jokes and you enjoyed long talks with him, ones that didn't turn into arguments. The two of you would go out to lunch occasionally—and you paid since he was a bit… lacking in that area—with him. You learned about his job as an architect and you told him about your little pottery hobbies. Kaveh was the one to encourage you to pursue it as a career, you could sell your work or- or maybe teach it to others even! You were moved by his enthusiasm, maybe you would get into it.

You had invited Kaveh to your home a few times that year, but you had never been to his. Maybe it was a good thing, anyway, he always said he had a roommate that he argued with quite a bit. If this roommate disagreed with Kaveh, they’d also probably disagree with you. And you weren’t fond of intellectual arguments, just discussions. Arguments made you want to cry, really.

You often popped open a bottle of wine with Kaveh when he came over after a long day. You poured two glasses—and many refills—and sat at your countertop with him.

“You know,” Kaveh was tipsy already, “Tomorrow you ought to come over to my place.”

“Are you sure? You keep telling me about that roommate of yours.”

“He should be busy,” Kaveh smiled, “We’d have the place to ourselves.”

“Maybe then, why the sudden change of heart?” You tilted your head, Kaveh usually voted against you coming over.

“Maybe its the wine,” He groaned, “Maybe I just feel bad that I’m always coming over and eating your food and drinking your wine.”

“Oh, no, it's fine.” You reassured him, “You’ve done so much for me already, without you I would’ve never started teaching classes. I don’t mind you drinking my wine, I poured it after all.”

“I insist!”

The man who opened the door was not Kaveh, it was not even a stranger.

“...Y/n?” Alhaitham furrowed his brows at you, “What are you doing here?”

“Alhaitham-!” You said, startled, “I um-”

“I’m sorry but right now I don’t really feel like talking.”

“No, Alhaitham, I’m-”

“I’m sorry to disappoint after you’ve come all this way but-”

“I’m not here for you.” You glared. Come all this way? You walked for maybe ten minutes! Did he really think he was worth coming all the way to Sumeru city if you didn’t live here? The nerve of him…

“She’s here for me.” Kaveh grumbled behind him, “And you’re not supposed to be.”

“Kaveh, hey!” You smiled past Alhaitham.

“Sorry, Y/n, I tried to send a message that my roommate was still home but I suppose it didn’t make it in time…”

“Oh, no, that’s fine.”

“Come in, come in!”

Alhaitham simply stood in his place at the door staring at you, and there was this look in his eyes you couldn't decipher. You pushed past him gently and hugged Kaveh in greeting. How does it feel now, Alhaitham?

✧ A SCHOLAR’S MONOLOGUE

Alhaitham was twenty-five when he ran into you again.

He didn’t know what to think at first. You show up on his door—how you got his address he’s unsure—and look just as shocked as he does. The last time you two spoke must have been when he was sixteen, no, seventeen? An eight-year gap left much of your life unknown. Just looking at you now you were far more intriguing. Though perhaps you were always cute to him in a way, if only you were as cute once you opened your mouth.

But when you did open your mouth and he heard your voice his ears tingled at this familiarly unfamiliar sound, and then you said you were there for Kaveh and it clicked for him. Kaveh always did remind Alhaitham of you, that might be why he found himself so irritated by him. You pushed past Alhaitham and headed into Kaveh’s arms and that left Alhaitham wondering the extent of your relationship with him. It’s odd, really, his thought process right now.

Then he listened in on your conversation with Kaveh and as each question he had was answered he came up with three more. When did you start giving lectures? When did you move to Sumeru City? When did you meet Kaveh?

“My classes went so well today, I really can’t thank you enough for encouraging me to start.” You chirped at Kaveh with this smile that was so much softer than your goofy grin when you were kids.

(maybe you were only mentioning this because you want Alhaitham to hear how good you're doing)

“You always had it in you, I don’t deserve that much credit!”

So Kaveh is the one who encouraged you to start. Encouraging you is something Alhaitham rarely did now that he thinks about it. Maybe Kaveh’s friendship is a much better fit for you, then. But why does he long to get to know you as if he hasn’t known you from the age of eight?

You were so far from the sixteen-year-old neighbor he once had. You were mature, physically and mentally, you spoke with grace and confidence and your conversations with Kaveh were undeniably intellectual. This is different from the person who asked him “How come you’re taller than me?” at the age of eleven. He was captivated, enamored even, despite not wanting to admit it to himself.

So he kept eavesdropping, he kept learning about your life indirectly. Suddenly this memory of you—the one tainted by irritation and annoyance of having you follow him around for eight years—was replaced by this new longing to get to know you as if you were a stranger.

It’s odd, he thinks, this feeling.

✧ END OF A SCHOLAR’S MONOLOGUE

It’s really awkward to hang out with your new friend in front of your childhood ex-friend.

You were laughing at inside jokes with Kaveh and talking about your lives with Alhaitham just across the room holding a book in his lap. You knew he was listening, you noticed. You would glance at him, then away, but your eyes always wondered over again in curiosity.

Alhaitham was so different, yet exactly the same. He was taller, you noticed that when you walked in. His face was mature with this feeling that he’s been through a thousand challenges and overcome every one. He seemed just as intelligent as ever, obviously, and just as bland.

(that was just you being mean, though, you didn't really think of him like that)

Every time you looked over Kaveh noticed, and there was this knowing smile lingering on his lips. Maybe he thought you found Alhaitham cute, or maybe he had overheard everything that Alhaitham said and he was being nosey about your past.

Either way, he asked.

“So, are you going to explain what’s going on here?” Kaveh whispered a certain glint in his eyes.

“Kaveh! He’s right there,” You whispered through clenched teeth, “It’s not even that big of a deal.”

“Let’s take a walk then,” Kaveh announces aloud, Alhaithams head tilting towards the sound. “Come, Y/n.”

You stood with Kaveh, shooting him this playfully irritated glance and took his outstretched hand in yours.

“See you, Alhaitham.” Kaveh bid farewell.

“Bye.” Alhaitham spoke without looking back at you this time.

You only were allowed fifteen minutes of peace before Kaveh jumped on you again.

“How do you know him? Did you guys date?”

“What? No, archons no, we were neighbors as kids.” You scrunched your face.

(but your heart sped up and those feeling you buried were scratching at the lid of their coffin)

“Oh? Then why did you look at him like that? You almost started drooling~.” Kaveh teased, nudging you.

“Oh quit it.” You nudged him back, “I haven’t seen him in almost a decade. That’s all.”

“It sounds like you ended on bad terms,” He mused, “Ahem ‘I don't feel like talking right now’ and all.”

You giggled at his imitation, “Well, he called me annoying and told me to leave him alone before I moved away. I’d say those terms are pretty bad.”

“Wow, what a dick move.” Kaveh laughed lightly, “And you’re still looking at him with hearts in your eyes?”

“I am not, and you know it!”

“Aww, are you embarrassed?” Kaveh grinned, throwing an arm around your shoulder, “Hmm, perhaps you should look at me like that instead next time.”

You rolled your eyes.

You saw Alhaitham everywhere after that.

You learned from Kaveh that Alhaitham was the current Acting Grand Sage—a fact that blew your mind completely because wow, he’s really made it far hasn't he? You could almost imagine your father comparing you to him again, it made you laugh a little bit. Maybe that’s why you kept seeing him around, in the streets, in the corner of your eye when you were at the tavern, and (obviously) in Kaveh’s home.

It was like you were strangers who knew too much about each other to be comfortable in the same room. If Kaveh excused himself for a single moment you and Alhaitham would just sit in silence, glancing at one another and away when you get caught. For months, not a single word was shared between the two of you, and if it weren’t so awkward you might have enjoyed the silence.

The silence was broken on a cold morning when you were meeting Kaveh at his place to go out to lunch. Once again, it was not Kaveh who opened the door, it was Alhaitham.

“Hello.”

“Hi,” You mustered a smile, “Is Kaveh ready?”

From afar, you heard Kaveh shout, “I’ll be ready soon!”

Alhaitham stood in the doorway and you stood outside of it. Your arms were getting goosebumps from the unusually cold air and Alhaitham took notice.

“Come in while you wait.” Alhaitham stepped to the side and closed the door behind you when you entered.

You awkwardly thanked him and sat down on the couch, him sitting on the one across from you.

…

“So…” You murmured.

“Hm?” Alhaitham glanced up.

“How has the position of Acting Grand Sage been treating you?”

“I intend to resign as soon as possible.” He stated.

“Oh! Um…” You didn’t know what to say, such an odd response that you probably would never get from anyone but Alhaitham.

(it hurt to remember that you really do know this man, and at the same time you know nothing about him anymore either)

“I heard you’re teaching art classes now,” Alhaitham said, “How has that been?”

“It’s great! I love my students, really, they’re all so creative. They’re like little sponges, too, they soak up anything I tell them.” You giggled, and Alhaitham's lips twitched up.

“Y/n, I-”

“I’m ready now!” Kaveh chirped, walking out of his room, “Aplogies, I had some hair troubles.”

“Ah, no problem!” You stood from your spot, “Let’s head out then.”

You glanced at Alhaitham, and he met your eyes for a moment.

“Um, see you, Alhaitham.”

“See you.”

✧ TWO ROOMMATES DISPUTE

“I don’t understand why you’re acting like this.” Kaveh sighed.

“I’m not sure what you mean.” Alhaitham flipped the page in his book.

“Don’t give me that.” Kaveh glared at Alhaitham, “You know very well what I mean. I know we have our disagreements but ever since Y/n has been around more you’ve been-”

Alhaitham abruptly closed his book with a loud clap.

“I am not concerned with Y/n.”

“Oh really? Because you seem to be.”

“What of it.” Alhaitham glared.

“You act as if it's wrong for me to be friends with her just because you used to be friends,” Kaveh spoke irritatedly, “Like it or not me and Y/n are close friends.”

“What would you know about our friendship?” Alhaitham crossed his arms.

“I know what she tells me, that’s what.” Kaveh huffed, “Just because you ruined your own relationship with her does not mean that I have to end mine because you’re jealous.”

Alhaitham was silent.

“You have made no attempt to reconcile or get to know her and that is not my fault. I cannot argue with you over something so stupid!” Kaveh was nearly yelling about this.

He was sick of Alhaitham being cold to him after he hung out with you or when you were around, Kaveh could see the jealousy brewing in Alhaitham’s eyes and he was not going to stand for being glared at over it. Alhaitham’s inability to fix things with you was not Kaveh’s problem. Just because now you were more appealing of a person doesn't mean he gets to act like some overprotective, jealous boyfriend.

For Alhaitham, he was torn. His emotions toward you were all over the place, did he like you? Did he find you irritating? Did he more-than-like you? How does he get these feelings in order, and then how does he get his attitude toward Kaveh in order too? Alhaitham isn’t oblivious to the fact he’s been colder than usual to his roommate, or even outright passive-aggressive, but facing the reason behind it is harder than it seems.

Maybe Kaveh is right. He has to talk to you.

✧ END OF TWO ROOMMATES DISPUTE

You stared blankly at Kaveh.

“What?”

“Alhaitham and I got in a fight about you…” Kaveh explained.

“About me?” You frowned, “What? Why would you two ever do such a thing?”

“Other than the fact he’s a complete jerk,” Kaveh sighed, “I think he has some issues regarding you.”

“Oh, so he just hates me so much that he can’t stand me being around then?” You roll your eyes, “We’re adults now, why can’t he just get over it?”

(but your heart ached at the thought that he truly cant stand you, even now)

“I don't think its hatred, Y/n.” Kaveh sighed, “I think it’s rather the opposite, and I don’t think he knows how to handle it.”

“So, what, he likes me? And that’s why he’s being a dick every time I’m around?” You snorted, “Classy.”

“Yeah,” Kaved rubbed the bridge of his nose, “You know what, forget about Alhaitham. I’d like you to come over for my birthday celebration.”

A warm smile wiggled up your face.

“Of course.”

You were twenty-five when you attended Kaveh’s birthday party.

You brought him a gift all wrapped up—and a bottle of wine, as if there wasn’t going to be enough alcohol already—and hugged him tightly at the door. You were positively beaming, smile stretched from ear to ear.

“Happy birthday!” You cheered.

“Thank you, thank you.” Kaveh laughed, pulling you in and pressing a friendly kiss to your temple, “I’m so happy to have you here.”

“I’m honored to be here.”

You cracked into the alcohol with a jolly smile on your face and downed glass after glass until you were just tipsy enough to not have a filter but not drunk enough to fall over. This is where you’d stop for the night, where you were content staying and giggly. You celebrated Kaveh with all of the other attendees.

But the air was becoming suffocating and there were a few too many people near you right now, maybe you needed some fresh air or maybe you needed to go home but you were only willing to do one of those (and it was not the latter). You stepped out of the party quietly.

And Alhaitham was there.

You were there, and Alhaitham was there, and the night sky above you was the same as it was when you were thirteen and sneaking out of your room to see him.

“Alhaitham…” Perhaps there was a bit of bittersweet longing in your voice, perhaps it was just the waver of the alcohol.

“Y/n.” But the emotion in Alhaitham’s voice could not be mistaken for anything but what it was: emotion.

“How are you?” You asked quietly.

“I’m fine.”

“Just fine?” You let a smile play at your lips, and one tugged at Alhaitham’s too.

“I can’t sleep.” He whispered, “You know how that is.”

(and for a moment you were thirteen again and knocking on Alhaitham’s window)

“I do.” Waves of emotion ran over you, was it grief? Longing? Love?

If there was one thing you could say confidently, it was that unrequited love lasts the longest. The crush that never gets returned and ends up lasting for years. You knew this firsthand. You felt this kind of affection for Alhaitham from the age of, what, eleven? Twelve maybe? And now at twenty-five, you felt like the lovesick teenage girl you were ten years ago because that affection never left you and you wondered if you could make it leave.

“I’ve missed you.” You wanted to slap yourself for saying that, but in your tipsy state, the words forming in your brain were coming out of your mouth faster than you could shut it.

“Oh?” Alhaitham smiled teasingly, “How much?”

You furrowed your brows, “Oh, come on, Alhaitham. You can’t act like that after everything.”

“...” Alhaitham glanced away, “You’re right.”

“I really loved you, you know. And- And the way you treated me was hurtful. I was just a kid, you were cruel.”

“I know.” Alhaitham swallowed hard, his voice coarse, “You loved me?”

“Yeah like it wasn’t obvious?” You snorted, “Of course I did, you were my childhood best friend, the neighbor boy, I looked up to you.”

…

“Well say something.” You frowned.

“What do you want me to say?” He turned to you.

“I want you to be honest.”

Say sorry, say you loved me too, say something.

“I did not love you.”

You cringed, heartbreak trickling over your skin like acid rain- no, stinging you like a thousand needles.

“I didn’t.”

You felt your entire inner body cave in on itself as your heart cried because yes, Al Haitham has always been matter of fact as long as you have known him, but damn if it didn't hurt. You knew there was little chance of him returning those feelings, the unrequited ones you’d held onto for so long. Still, hearing him reject you over and over was like the final nail in the coffin, the coffin you laid in alive and well and clawed at to get out of.

“You were irritating, a bit airheaded, and you always distracted me no matter what I was doing.” Al Haitham continued, “So I didn't love you, I hardly tolerated you.”

You felt your face betray you, twisting into something hurt and honest as warm tears slid down your cheeks and your chest shook with rapid sniffles.

“But now… You’re brilliant, you’re witty and kind, and despite everything you’re here. So no, I did not love you, but now I do.”

“You’re such a dick.” You sobbed.

“I just told you I love you, that’s not exactly the best way to respond.” Alhaitham spoke as if he was amused, but the way his hand found your back and rubbed circles into it told you he doesn't want you to cry.

“But you said all that mean stuff,” You wiped your tears, “That was cruel.”

“Well that’s how I used to feel, you wanted to know how I used to feel, didn’t you?” He wiped your hair from your face and tucked it behind your ears.

“I can’t believe you.”

“I’m sorry,” Alhaitham muttered, turning you to face him. “You’re beautiful.”

“You’re a jerk.” You frowned, and he laughed airily and it sounded like music to your ears.

“Y/n, I love you. I mean it.” He rubbed your cheek gently, “If you’ll allow it, I’d like to get to know you much better than I’ve ever known you before.”

“Maybe.” You whispered, staring into his eyes.

“I promise you I’ll never hurt you again.” He murmured, placing a kiss on your hairline.

(and maybe it was a coincidence, but he wiped the spot that Kaveh kissed and you giggled at the thought that he was jealous)

✧ navigation.

#opticfile ✧༺࿐#genshin #genshin imagines #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #alhaitham #alhaitham gi #alhaitham genshin #kaveh #kaveh gi #kaveh genshin #gi x reader #genshin x you #genshin angst #i hope its not a big fat disappointment guys

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chronic-cynic · 1 year ago

Text

"'You're so different,' he says, shaking his head and squinting at me.

'I may have grown a few centimetres since I was eleven.'

'No, it's—' He stops himself.

I put down my phone. 'What? It's what?'

'You're more serious.'

I don't remember not being serious. As far as I'm concerened, I came out of the womb spouting cynicism and wishing for rain." (Oseman 73)

This is an analysis of Tori Spring and her unreliability as a narrator. It will be incredibly long, so I hope I do not bore anyone.

Lucas, as we know, had been Tori's best friend throughout elementary school. He had a dream, to chase after his childhood best friend and start a beautiful romance—which was nicely foreshadowed by the line: "'[The Great Gatsby is] about...' He pauses to think. 'It's about someone who's in love with a dream'" (72). However, he realizes that she wasn't the person he thought she was. Or rather, she isn't the person she used to be.

Alongside Lucas, there are two other characters that hint at the fact that Tori was never this pessimistic: Mr. Kent and Becky.

Near the beginning of the novel, Tori mentions how she and Kent know each other quite well because he has been her teacher for over five years. And, throughout the novel, Kent continuously shows his concern for Tori and her attitude towards life. It would make a lot of sense for him to be this concerned if he had actually seen life in Tori to begin with. Along with that, it is very clear that Tori is liked by the teachers, as stated by Becky on page 79. Again, it would make more sense for this to be the case if she was a different person when she was younger.

Finally: Becky. Throughout the novel, Tori feels incredibly jealous towards her best friend, and she feels the gap between them comes from the fact that Becky moved on while she stayed exactly where she was. However, during their argument after the Solitaire party, Becky says, "you've changed. I might have changed too, but you definitely have. And that's not necessarily a bad thing, but it's true" (310). This completely contradicts everything Tori has told the reader.

The scene in which Tori reads her old diary illustrates my point perfectly.

"Up at the crack of 10:30am. Becky et moi went to the cinema today and saw Pirates of the Carribean (is that how you spell it???) 2 and OMG it was SO GOOD. Becky thinks Orlando Bloom is the fittest. Then we went to get pizza in the high street she had Hawaiian but obviously mine was plain cheese. YUM! She's coming round next week for a sleepover too. She says she needs to tell me about a boy that she likes!! And we're going to eat so much food and stay up all night and watch films!!!!!" (274)

It's very clear with the exclamation marks and enthusiasm in her tone that no, she was not born serious. Unlike now, Tori used to be genuinely happy to listen to Becky's relationships with boys. And—my favourite detail—the use of French in the second sentence. The word "moi" was almost always used by tweens as a quirky replacement for "me" (source: me. I used to use that word all of the time because I thought it was cute and silly. Gross). This is my favourite detail because of an earlier scene with Oliver when Tori says, "Are you suggesting that Charlie is better at Mario Kart than moi?" (63). Now, this could just be a coincidence, but I like to think that this is Tori's inner child being revealed to her little brother, especially because she would never speak to anyone else in that way. But, I digress.

So, I have now established how Tori has been unreliable with the way she describes herself, but what else has she been lying about? I think the most obvious answer is her hatred and lack of knowledge about literature.

Unlike everything I explained above, Tori does admit to lying near the end of the book, saying that books scare her because of how personal they feel. However, there are many things that contradicted her prior to this reveal. For example, her grades in her previous English class—as mentioned by Kent—and the way she used to read with Lucas.

After Lucas speaks about the books he is currently reading, Tori tells the reader, "I nod as if I understand. I don't. I don't know a single thing about literature despite studying it for A level" (72). Yet when Michael tests her on famous literary works, she is able to answer every question correctly, once again contradicting everything she has said.

Her unreliability is not deliberate, it comes from lies she tells herself. However, it seems like she knows the truth deep down. But I guess she is justified. After all, it feels better to say you were born serious than to admit to the damage the world has done to you.

#i hope this is worth something to someone #oh god this is quite long #nobody would want to read such an essay #i hope it does not seem like i am grasping at straws this #these are just things that i noticed #i tried to follow mla quotation rules but i know i broke them in many different places #because i am not actually writing an essay #forgive me #tori spring #solitaire alice oseman #becky allen #lucas ryan #michael holden #solitaire analysis #cynic.txt

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damnfandomproblems · 2 months ago

Text

(mod note: this is an older submission from 2022, and is a follow-up from the person who submitted Fandom Problem #3680. They submitted an additional follow-up which I will be including here as well rather than posting as its own problem. I'm not going to attempt to fit the entire text body into the image this time, the majority will be included under the cut.)

Fandom Problem #6719:

So, Book 2. It starts with Anne and Betty back in their village. Anne’s doing a play for their one year anniversary of going to the school. When they first came back, they got statues built and they had interviews and autograph sessions, started by Anne of course. Anne was surprised Betty came to all of them. But then people got bored and less people came to the autograph sessions. Betty was ok with this but Anne wasn’t. She needed the fame from being the one of the first 2 people to come back from the school because if she couldn’t be a princess, this was the closest she would ever get in this village. And Anne’s father and stepmother is getting married. The stepmother also has 2 sons that I forgot to mention that Anne’s father treats as his own. Father is Keith and stepmother is Luella. Apparently I misremembered, they’re not married in Book 1, they were in courtship or something. They’re getting married in this book. Anne is upset and the play is her plan to talk her father out of the wedding. There was apparently a scene where Luella is portrayed badly. I don’t remember how and the wiki doesn’t say how but I know it’s meant to be bad. She learns that they’re getting married tomorrow so her plays plan are gone.

Meanwhile, Betty is thinking about Cornelius but her mother tries to get her to talk about the evil school and even tries to get her to brew some potions with her. The true story of what happened wasn’t told to the villagers and so they think Anne went to good school and Betty went to the evil one. But Betty refuses and her mother gets mad. She sees a fairy tale book and stars crying but manages to disguise it by chopping onions.

Betty sees Anne visiting her mother’s grave because in case you forgot, her house is located in a graveyard. Anne tells Betty about her mother. She had two sons that were born dead and it was thought she would be unable to have any children until she had Anne by some miracle. And how she feels like her father would have liked a son more and wanted to name him Mitchel. Her complex about her father wanting a son more may have been mentioned in Book 1 but I’m like 60% sure it happened in Book 2. She said that her mother knew her father and Luella, who was her best friend, were seeing each other and that she doesn’t want to end up like her and that she would do anything to see her again.

When Anne goes to sleep, she gets too super special villain dreams where she dreams she is torturer and kills her soon to be stepbrothers. She gets scared because she also gets these symptoms that come with these dreams and she thinks she saw a glimpse of her witch self in the mirror.

This village is ruled by council of three old men with beards. A conversation between Betty her mother tells us that marriages used to be forced by them and that Anne’s father suffered the most from that. During the wedding, Anne makes a big effort to be good and happy for the marriage because last night’s nightmare scared her and she doesn’t want to become a witch again. As for Betty, the entire wedding feels her with regret of what could have been with Cornelius (Girl, why do you like him. You guys barely had any nice and normal conversations. You literally just decided to like him after your “makeover”). Just as Keith and Luella were about to kiss, arrows fly out of the forest. They’re magic arrows who attack Anne who takes shelter in the church, the only place where the arrows wouldn’t attack her. Long story short, she stuck in church, Luella tells her the marriage won’t go on without her so it’s delayed until everything is over, people visit to bring her food, she is happy about the attention, eventually they lock her in along with Betty who wouldn’t leave her to keep her safe, there’s this pillow where she stitched Betty’s face over the prince’s face so it’s two girls on the pillow now, Betty sees some things that make her think Anne is becoming a witch again, half the town is destroyed by the arrows and there are signs telling them to give them Anne.

The three old men tell them that they are going to bring Anne somewhere safer but Betty realises they are going to sacrifice her so she tries to stop them. She chases after them following a trail of face cream Anne left as a trail. She’s mistaken as an attacker but luckily Keith realises it was her when he tries to attack her. She confesses it was her wish that caused this. He threatens her to bring his daughter back no matter what and she promises him.

She runs into some danger in the forest. She reaches a moat filled with crocodiles but she notices they spare the female deer, so she takes a chance. She finds Anne tied up and cover with blood. The attackers see them, and they run away. They follow some blue butterflies because Anne thinks that they are beautiful so they wouldn’t lead them to danger. They make it to the magic train station except the trains are magic vines where they went during their field trip. Betty threatens their way into getting on the vine. They notice a bunch of good women talking to each other while the men don’t talk to each other. The attackers almost catch them, but they make it to the school where Professor Fairy and Lady Ivy find them. They hurry them into Professor Fairy’s office and tell them one of them made a wish that caused their story’s ending to be undone. Betty admits it was her and Anne feels betrayed. They learn that things they have changed since they left this world. And this is also when the series starts going downhill and about when I started hating it.

Basically, after they went home and their story ended, everyone around the world read their story. As a result, princesses started kicking their princes out of their castles and becoming friends with the witches that were once their enemies (not in a gay way, this book makes it really clear that they’re just friends), changing their happily ever after. (There were certain lines in the first book that implied most of the villains die at the end of fairy tales, but I think that detail isn’t important. But I never forgot the world building details that were never delivered or contradicted. Were all the teachers at the evil school just losers that survived their fairy tales or they just became teachers? Is there a teacher school in this world? I never get an answer for this.) The world became what far right misogynistic nutjobs think the world would become if women had equal rights. One day, the girls from the evil school were ejected from the school by a magic force so they went to the good school for shelter. The good girls took a page from Anne and Betty’s story and let them in, which lead to the boys being ejected from the good school and they went to the evil school instead. Instead of the good and evil schools, it’s now the girls and boys schools. Cornelius also got a hold of the headmaster’s tower and is now the headmaster and he also has the magic pen. He wants Betty and there’s a high chance he will go to war for her. The teachers urge Betty to pick either him or Anne. If she picks Cornelius, Anne will go home and the world will go back to normal. If she picks Anne, they will both go home and war will at least be avoided. But first, they need to get the magic pen to write their ending. If neither happens, a war between boys and girls will happen.

They are suddenly interrupted by their dead history teacher’s secret half sister no one has ever heard nor did the first book ever foreshadowed who is apparently now the dean of the school of girls. I can’t remember exactly how she took the position but I think it was something to do with the magic school approving her. She takes them to a welcome ceremony where a bunch of girls in blue pants and veils (I don’t remember the colour of the shirts but probably blue.) dance for them and give them gifts. Anne being Anne and apparently having learnt nothing from last year starts to think maybe she and Betty should just stay here because they’re treated like celebrities here. The dancing girls then rip off their veils and it’s just their female classmates from last year. Except for this newcomer who has red hair and covers her face with a veil. She’s said to be tall and has muscles. She doesn’t speak but makes weird squawking sounds. They’re told she’s named Nila. The good girls have now given up makeup and fashion and some even have gained weight (to Anne’s horror). Genevieve is basically bald now because she hacked off most of her hair. The evil girls are now experimenting with makeup but they’re not really good at it.

I’m really hazy about the events that come next, and the wiki is not helping. But the school has changed, there are now new paintings (it used to be just your typical fairy tale fare) that depict princess being friends with witches and girls being strong warriors and boys dead in the background. I think what happens next is that Betty gets dragged by Anne’s old roommates to a bathroom. The leader of the three (also the one who almost defeated Cornelius last year in the competition) is mad that the evil school is gone. She’s Onyx and the other girl I barely mentioned in my previous rant is Pamela. Pamela actually appears a lot. I know her powers (controlling her pet white rats) and what she looks like (pale white skin with white hair and red eyes) but I genuinely cannot remember anything she does in the series but she’s close to Onyx. Onyx and Pamela are still wearing their old uniforms because their old teacher taught them a spell that gives them rashes if they wear the new one and the dean reluctantly let them wear their old ones after a while. Onyx is mad because she wanted to be the top evil student which she can no longer do. Eli is also there but she’s now pretty and thin and her magic changed from turning things to chocolate to turning things to vegetables. Eli likes it here but her friends bully her into agreeing with them. Onyx says that they hate boys but they think boys are necessary for the balance of the world and wants Betty to choose Cornelius. Meanwhile, Anne is with the new dean Queenie Rose (the dead history teacher has the same last name) who is showing her around the school. Anne grows more and more sure that staying here is the best choice. She ends their tour showing her a giant mural depicting girls ruling over boys. Princesses and witches are like sitting and holding hands while boys are slaves doing work while being whipped. Yes, like that one propaganda art that is being memed on unironically. Yes, this entire scene is as stupid as it sounds. Seeing this, Anne realises this is in fact the future she wants and promises to the dean that she will make it happen.

Classes start and there are now classes for girls. Instead of learning stuff like beauty and posture, they now learn sword fighting and weaponry. There’s also nonsense about how blue was “kept” from them by the boys even though Betty literally wore a blue dress during the entire fight scene last book and a teacher was punished for wearing a pink accessory because it’s now a colour of weakness. Their old teachers struggle to teach them these lessons but they comply anyway because they’re scared the dean will get rid of them. The heads of the two headed dogs can separate, the good one is still part of the staff even though he’s male because he sucked up to the new dean. He no longer has the body as it’s with his brother, the other head. The students weren’t sure if he was male or female at first but the wiki says he is male. The old good teacher who teaches talking to animals refused to change her classes to be about hunting and she was fired. She was ejected into the woods surrounding the school and they think she was killed by the boys school’s guards or the homeless princes who were kicked out of their castles camping out in the woods surrounding the boys school. The guards were the same one who were hunting Anne, they don’t have names but they all wear red cloaks so they call them reds. And they’re apparently led by this random evil boy who’s extremely vicious and who wasn’t there last year and is now Cornelius’s right-hand man. History class has also been changed and is taught by the new dean. Instead of using the old history books, hers is a revised version all depicting girls as heroes and boys as villains. The history book’s title literally starts with “A revised version of”.

During class, Betty sees Cornelius appear to her in spirit form telling her to meet him. She asks the roommates for help and says that she worried that Anne is becoming a witch again because she thought she saw a wart. It disappeared after a second. They were a bit unconvinced until they see a pigeon she accidentally killed in class. Unlike getting expelled and turned into slaves for the school like last year, the girls with lowest scores just get sent to guard the gates of their school at night. So Betty and Eli fails together and Betty sneaks off into the boy school. She gets through the same way as last year by tricking the barrier spirit but with the new five rules for being boys and girls that replaced the rules for good and evil. I forget how but Anne manages to find out so she turns into a bird and follows her. But the shield makes her fall into a snake pit and she uses her magic to turn the snakeskin into a cape that can turn her invisible. I’m about 70% sure she learn this in class yesterday because there’s no way this girl would remember anything that isn’t recipes for beauty products for that long. She manages to get there first.

The good boys have become incel frat bros. There’s this scene where they’re throwing a house party and everything’s a mess. They’re no longer well-groomed or polite but now they’re belching, and I think one of them said they haven’t bathed for a while. The evil boys are mad at them because their parties keep them up at night and they’re making too much of a mess. And they say that there’s no point in taking care of their appearance if there’s no girls and they started chanting how they want girls. Then Betty appears. She and Cornelius begins to talk. She tells him she came like he asked but he's confused because he never asked her to. He’s still happy to see her but he’s paranoid that Anne’s secretly with her. She is in the same room with her invisibility cloak but neither of them know. He tells her that he at first accepted her choosing Anne because he wants her to be happy. But then, the world starts to be ruled by radfems and he’s ridiculed for having his princess choose someone else. He still accepts her choice though but then he senses her wish and decides to get her back. They’re about to kiss but then he stops because he still thinks he needs to kill Anne first or this entire scenario would repeat itself. (He’s not wrong) They start arguing and he accuses Betty of being in cahoots with Anne because only witchcraft could have let her through the barrier. Cornelius, don’t be blinded by what happened at the big battle last book, she’s not smart enough to figure out how to do that. Her intelligence is based on plot convenience. Anne, seeing her chance, shoots a pink spell at them. They think each other cast it and starts fighting. Betty escapes and swears she will never love him because she’s evil. For a series that establishes that evil and good is just different sides of a story, it sure does treat evil as, evil. Betty finds Anne fast asleep in her because she somehow manages to make it back before her.

Cornelius tells his right-hand man, the new evil boy Sedric to let the princes outside into the school because they’re going to war. He tells the dean that there would be competition like last year where each school’s top ten compete. If the boys win, Anne and Betty will be executed and if the girls win, all the boys will become slaves. Betty is 100% on Anne’s side now and she tells the roommates that and she also says that she hasn’t seen a wart or any other sign so maybe she was just seeing things. Onyx isn’t convinced. In the middle of this, Anne cuts in and says that as long as they are together, she will no longer be a witch. The dean accepts the deal and everyone starts training. Anne, Betty and the roommates decide they need to sneak into the boy school to get the magic pen. They realised that the female gnome teaching them is the same gnome from last year who taught them for the mixed good and evil class. Gnomes can change sex when they’re young but they usually settle into just one sex when they’re an adult. They find out that Jim is taking this sex change potion to be a woman so he could stay in this school. He doesn’t have a lot of it, only enough for one person until the competition starts. They decide on Anne because based on the five rules, she’s the closest one to a boy. She needs to get the pen and find Betty during the competition. Anne is reluctant at first but realises that this is the best chance to stay with Betty and not turn into a witch.

Cornelius has put a price on their heads offering half of his kingdom’s treasury for the bounty. He’s King Arthur’s son (yeah, it’s not a fairy tale but there’s a lot of artistic liberties taken including changing some of them to fit the lore of the world-there’s stuff I want to say about that) so he’s apparently super duper rich. Richer than the average prince (even though we learn that Camelot is heading towards ruin in Book 3 after the whole Lancelot and Guinevere thing and Arthur dying but apparently, it’s waiting for him when he becomes king? I don’t know) so even when the princes weren’t homeless, they wanted his wealth. He’s now hated by the boys because he essentially offered them as slaves to the girls without their consent and he’s now realising that they’re not exactly well-equipped to handle this competition so he decides to wake the male teachers. They’re in the dungeons asleep under a spell. The boys found them like that when the schools changed and couldn’t get them to wake up. After doing some research, he realises he needs Harry to turn into a wolf because his special talent is that he’s a werewolf and howl at them to wake them up. He says he’ll do it in exchange for a spot in the competition because he wants to get revenge on Anne for breaking his heart and using him. He realised that after she left that he was used and is mad at her. Cornelius agrees and he wakes the teacher up. It turns out that although the teachers were asleep, they could hear everything, so they know what’s going on. Cornelius loses his control over the school and now also has to compete for the chance of a spot.

Anne decides to use Mitchel as her fake name so she can finally become the son her father always wanted. She drinks the potion and shows up as the prince of Luella Valley competing for the bounty. She gets away with the name because this world is apparently endless so nobody knows every kingdom. She gets stuck in the dungeons because they think that she’s too girly. Cornelius is also there because of the slavery thing. He’s in a bad emotional and physical state because of Betty’s “betrayal” and being whipped everyday. They don’t get along but that changes after she manages to get Sedric to stop whipping him. She makes friends with Harry again who also has to compete for a spot because the spot he was promised became null and void after Cornelius is no longer the headmaster. The leader gets to pick the last spot so she promises him that spot if he helps her cheat. She and Cornelius grow closer and he considers her his first real friend. She tells him she wants to see her mother again and he tells her his father put a bounty on his mother’s head and he will catch and kill her. It’s mentioned in the Wikipedia article that he will do this once he become king at 16 so he was 14 last year during that stupid bathroom scene. She begins to feel her old feelings for him come back. I don’t understand why this book acts as though she had always had genuine feelings for him when she clearly liked him because he was the best prince and also the handsomest one. Time passes and useless as ever, Anne realises she had made zero progress in getting the pen. With Harry’s help, she’s the leader and she picks Cornelius because she couldn’t bear to disappoint him, screwing over Harry again for the nth time and signing her own death warrant. It was at this point I started getting incredibly frustrated at her bullshit. She never learns, her intelligence fluctuates based on the plot and she always seem to get away with everything with a slap on a wrist.

Meanwhile, Betty covers for Anne by saying she’s sick but that she’ll be ready for the competition. She realises she still wants Cornelius (WHY) because she keeps dreaming about him. She also finds the snakeskin cape Anne hid. I’m really hazy what happens in the next scene. Lady Ivy is suspicious and asks what they’re planning. She avoids her questions. She gets a hint to go to a cave at the corner of school’s grounds. I don’t remember if it was the butterflies or Lady Ivy giving her a clue. I don’t know why she would give her a clue because it doesn’t help her but my blurry memory says that that’s the more likely option. She goes to visit Jim first who’s just cross-dressing now that he doesn’t have any potion left but finds it on fire. She thinks he’s dead and runs to the cave. I don’t know, something happening in that sequence. She gives to the cave and realises Lady Ivy was a mother. Evil teacher are meant to give up everything when they become part of the staff but she kept her child and raised him in the cave until the old headmaster found out and told her to leave or to abandon him. She abandoned him. Betty realises at this point that the dean controls butterflies (it was really obvious but thanks for finally noticing) and she was the one who lead them to the school. She is chased by them and falls hitting her head.

She wakes up and realises she’s been unconscious until the day of the competition. She’s supposed to go in as a pair with Anne but the dean seems to let her just go in alone. Realising that she knows their plans through eavesdropping on them using her butterflies, she hurries to find Anne. She finally puts together all the clues and realises that Anne was the one who shot the spell at them.

Anne’s potion is wearing off and she’s slowly turning into a girl again but Cornelius hasn’t noticed yet. They encounter a dying Nila who was stabbed by Sedric. She says some cryptic things and Anne realises she was actually Leonardo, the guy who dyed his hair blond to try get Genevieve to pick him and the guy Kira liked. He’s been drinking the potion to stay in the girl school and it’s now wearing off because he’s dying. The reason Nila never spoke was because the potion doesn’t change your voice so he never spoke to avoid losing his cover. He was mentioned to be missing earlier in the book but no one really cared where he was. He went to the girl school because he was bullied by Sedric and he thinks that their school was so beautiful. The dean knew and let him but I can’t remember why or if he was ever given a reason. I mean, considering the state of the boy school, I can understand why. Anyway, he realised that Mitchel is actually Anne and then he dies. Cornelius is confused about everything. Boy, are you in for one of the stupidest sequences of events ever. He thinks he’s imagining things form the blood loss from a previous encounter (I can’t remember) because he thinks Mitchel is becoming more feminine. So he tries to kiss Anne because he thinks he looks like a girl and is so pretty.

Betty sees them, not long after realising Anne’s ruse. Cornelius acts like a guilty boyfriend who was caught cheating. She starts screaming at Anne and Cornelius is confused how they know each other. He doesn’t understand anything but then starts talking about how he finally understands the value of friendship and why Anne and Betty treasure each other so much now that he has Mitchel as his best friends. Betty tells him to look at his best friends and he sees Anne, now fully a girl again. He also realises her trick in the tower at the same time. Anne begins to defend herself but she realises that they’re no longer listening and Cornelius has Betty in his arms, looking like a lovesick couple. Anne starts crying because she realises she has lost her best friend and the chance of getting back together with her ex again. Lady Ivy appears because she was worried that Cornelius hurt the girls because of some disturbances with the barrier over the competition area and realises Anne was the cause for the trouble. Because she broke the rules, the barrier between the boys and girls break and war is minutes from happening. She is swept away by butterflies but before she’s taken away, she tells Betty to kiss Cornelius.

Then, the dean appears, carried by her butterflies along with the magic pen. She uses magic to make Anne start turning into a witch. Betty tells Anne she can’t trust her anymore and that she’s turning into a witch again she kisses Cornelius. But before the pen can write final word, she stops it. Betty notices that Anne no longer look like a witch and it was the dean all along. The dean then reveals that it was Anne’s wish to see her mother again that undid their ending. She conjures up the ghost of her mother and tells her to kiss her because true love’s kiss can even revive the dead. Anne kisses her and then realises that the person she kissed was actually the headmaster. The dean was actually in love with the headmaster the whole time and came to the school to revive him because he promised he would be with her afterwards. He kills her almost immediately and lets the magic pen write the last word. Betty starts to fade as she’s sent back to her village and he tries killing Cornelius but she manages to take him with her at the last second. Both schools turn black and the book ends.

I feel like there’s a message in the first and second book but I cannot for the life of me figure out what the author is going for. It feels too disjointed and incoherent. In the companion book that’s a school handbook released after the third book, it’s mentioned that the good students’ classes are no longer separated by gender so there’s a message to this mess but I cannot see it. And I’m sick of deaths of characters no cared about but we’re supposed to be sad over them. The history teacher just gave Betty a few hints and then just sacrificed himself to protect the balance of good and evil. Leonardo doesn’t have much screen time in this first book or the second. That was literally the first and last time we hear him speak properly (if we exclude the scene where they realise that Nila can actually speak when she was talking to the dean and I am). The coolest and most interesting parts of the first book that I liked despite its lukewarm plot were the setting. The classes for good and evil were interesting and I liked the competition and talent show events because they were had some really cool scenes. Everything about the world felt magical and had enchanting atmosphere. But this book had none of that and it had a stupid plot with a confusing core message so I didn’t really enjoy it. I knew I wouldn’t enjoy the third book and that it would suck but I thought it was a trilogy and despite everything, I was curious about the ending. And hey, it just one book. If it was a longer series, I wouldn’t buy it. Little did I know that it wouldn’t be a trilogy. And despite my efforts, look like this rant isn’t any shorter than the last one.

I think the only thing I forgot to mention is the dean’s backstory. She used to be the history teacher for evil for about 2 months. She told the headmaster who was still looking for a way for evil to win that she was his true love and that her brother’s prediction that someone who’s not part of the fairy tale world is his true love is wrong. For some reason, she uses her butterflies to eavesdrop on the good students and spread chaos by telling them the secrets and insults they spoke behind their back. Lady Ivy tries to stop her but she blackmails her telling her that she knows that she is raising her child in secret. For the first time ever, Lady Ivy and Professor Fairy decided to team up and tried to convince the headmaster to fire her. He agrees and tells the Professor Rose that he would need to take over her classes and asks why he asked him to give her a position. He says maybe it was too early for her. When she’s about to be evicted, she tells him he will die if he’s wrong about her being his true love. So he promises she will be allowed back to the school if he does die and revive him.

(Mod note: this persons next submission follows)

Somehow I still managed to forget stuff: There was this history class where the dean decided to show the story of Cornelius’ dad. It’s basically the King Arthur legend but biased towards Guinevere and has some shots at Cornelius.

This is the last book that I have read of this story. I had only bought this book because I thought it was the last book in the series and I was pretty curious about the ending. I would not have bought it had I known there were more books in the series. I legitimately cannot describe about how frustrated I was when I learned that there was a fourth book, and I will admit that a lot of my bitterness at this series was because of the money I spent on it. I’m not from America or the UK so the price on the books tend to vary from bookstore to bookstore so I don’t know how much it cost in those countries, but I remember noticing that it was a bit pricier than the past 2 books and I thought that might have something to do with the fact that it was around 650 pages instead of like around 500 pages like the other 2 books. During writing the past 2 rants, I relied on the wiki to fill me in the holes of my memories of the story but the third book’s wiki is incomplete but Wikipedia had a longer summary. It was changed to have a shorter summary not long after the first post so I like to think that someone read my rant and decided to change the Wikipedia article to stop me from complaining further. But unfortunately for them, I just used the older archived version of the article.

So, both the schools are now evil. The difference is that one is new and another is old. The former girl school that was the former good school is now the new school. The headmaster still needs to marry Anne so he can destroy good forever, but Anne is procrastinating because she now has attachment issues due to Betty and Cornelius not choosing her (which was her own fault, not that she acknowledges it). But she eventually accepts the proposal after 3 weeks, but the magic pen still doesn’t accept this as a happy ending. I can’t remember exactly but I believe the storybook won’t close and the magic pen is still hovering over the book even after it already wrote “The End”. The sun gets weaker and if the story is not over, the entire fairy tale world will be gone because of this stupid indecisive love triangle. Anne also becomes a teacher for the new evil school because the headmaster. . . I don’t remember but I think he wants her to be his equal or something and to show him being blinded by his love for her because she is not qualified in the slightest. And he is genuinely in love with her because the plot says so. My memory of this book is the spottiest, but I swear no real reason was given as to why he loves her. Because she’s so evil?? Because loving her will get him world domination?? A mixture of the two?? But I feel like it’s genuine because we later learn he reopened the old spa room so he can spend time in there so he can impress her and there’s like certain comments by other characters about he seemed to have regressed in mental age to like a lovesick teenager.

Meanwhile, Betty and Cornelius are trapped in her mother’s house. They can’t leave because after half the village is destroyed, the village kind of became a dictatorship under the three old men with patrolling guards and everything. There’re bounties on both Betty and Anne’s heads because the old men branded them as witches. When they first arrived in the village, Betty was dragging an injured Cornelius to her house because her mother’s a doctor and she was fantasizing about her future dates with Cornelius at the village and I felt this was OOC even when I first read it because I thought that, despite everything that she did, she would be worried about Anne especially after realising they were both played in the last book. But anyway, the couple was happy for a few days despite being stuck in the same house but then they got frustrated with each other and started fighting. I can’t say for sure, but I think I remember a line where Betty was wondering why she even liked him in the first place. There’s now this scenario where now BOTH of them miss Anne because she was their best friend and they kind of fight with each other sometimes throughout the book about who’s her best friend. This is probably to make it come full circle because Anne and Betty both wanted Cornelius in the first book, Anne and Cornelius wanted Betty in the second and now Betty and Cornelius wants Anne. This doesn’t quite fit though because the friendship between Cornelius and Anne wasn’t ever properly explored after they reunite later.

They were eventually caught by a guard when they found out her mother was stealing food for them. And they found out that her mother and Anne’s father were made into guards as punishment. I don’t know why her mother didn’t tell them, it’s not like it would change anything. Cornelius puts his foot into his mouth by revealing that he’s the one who destroyed the village, getting them a worse sentence where they and Betty’s mother were going to be burned alive. But her mother saves them by revealing she can use magic (you can’t use magic in this world so this is added to the surprise) and sacrifices herself so that they can escape. They were told to go to a grave. It was Anne’s mother’s grave. They went through it and ended up in a graveyard in the fairy tale world. They also meet up with Betty’s old teacher who talk to animals who was presumed dead after she got kicked out of the school last year, Princess Tora.

She explains everything about the world ending and how a bunch of dead villains are now zombies that are hunting down the heroes of their stories to change the endings of their original fairy tale. She’s taking them to meet up with a bunch of old heroes who have gone into hiding who were assembled by Merlin, who Cornelius has an abandonment issue about. They’re attacked on the way by some undead villains and Princess Tora is petrified so they had to carry her there. All the heroes are old and not really capable of fighting anything and their first appearance can be summed up as a lot of fat and old jokes. Jim the gnome is also there because he wasn’t shown explicitly dead off screen. A lot of them aren’t happy to see them and even suggest giving them to the villains so that everything can go back to normal.

And Jack from Jack and the Beanstalk and Sleeping Beauty are dating. This is not really important to the plot but I was very curious as to whether they started dating recently or not because I distinctly remembered a comment about their honeymoon being delayed and also, like how many times finding your one and only true love is emphasized in this damn story, I wanted to know how remarriage would work in this world. Peter Pan is also there but he’s old and so is Tinkerbell. There’s also a couple other fairytale characters that didn’t have romance in their original story there but I’m focusing on him because I vividly remember him being unmarried. I had assumed every good fairytale characters had like a romance (and if they didn’t have one in the original, the story would be tweaked in-universe to fit the lore) because the entire reason the headmaster wanted marry Anne was because evil can’t love, and he believes that it would make evil win again. Like, you literally have no idea how fucking hard this story pushes about how every fairytale has a prince and princess happily married. And from how the story went, it very much seemed that he would correct in that assumption had he succeeded. The whole fucking riddle in Book 1 about what good always has and what evil doesn’t. And no, platonic love doesn’t fucking make sense because there was a whole scene where the book shows that both the evil students and their parents love each other very much and it’s very much referring to romantic love. Romantic love is literally taboo for the evil students! If there are fairy tales where good wins without romance, then it means that there’s a different reason as to why evil keeps losing and therefore a different solution.

Anyway, Merlin arrives and breaks up the argument. He tells them that in order to stop the headmaster they need to specifically get Anne to destroy the ring he gave her with Excalibur (something about it the strongest good weapon or whatever). So, they and Merlin set off to the school to rescue Anne and get the sword because Cornelius dropped it when he was sent to the village. I literally cannot remember most of this trip except for Merlin being your usual stereotypical eccentric wizard, some relationship troubles and Betty’s loss of her powers to grant wishes (a plotline I have completely forgotten most of the details of that didn’t really play a big part in the plot anyway). They sneak into the school with the sex change potion and some hair dye as like transfer students. Cornelius won a trivia contest between who knew Anne better, so he rescues her (yes, the Anne-is-MY-best-friend plotline is still present) while Betty has to get the sword in the old evil school. This was to make Betty wonder if she ever properly got to know Anne but I feel like this would have been better to showcase this in book 1 to show that this friendship isn’t entirely horrible because of Anne and not in book 3 after she tried killing her, ruining her love life and getting hitched with the evilest guy ever after her friend got angry at her for lying to her and also failing to do her one job. On another note, I expected to experience interesting morality because they basically said that good and evil are just perspectives but we’re just straight up having the headmaster be evil but like, even worse than usual evil.

Meanwhile, Anne is trying her hand at being a teacher, taking over her mentor, Lady Ivy’s class. Her mentor is still there, just doing other things and seemingly on evil’s side now, disregarding her friendship with Professor Fairy and all her ex-classmates hate her for obvious reasons. Her ex-roommates seem to be thrilled with evil though and have let bygones be bygones. Harry is also hot now because yes, if you’ve noticed the pattern by now, he is now going to become a main character and a possible love interest of Anne. He’s been working out and going to the spa room. He seems to hate her which upsets Anne because she’s now a bit attracted to him because of how he now looks. She’s also attracted to Sedric, the new evil boy from the last book, who’s actually Lady Ivy’s son that she abandoned. It was hinted at so not a surprise.

The ex-roommates however were secretly working with the old heroes and snuck the couple in. Betty does her obligatory trick the barrier spirit with the new five rules thing and gets the word and finds out the old evil school is filled with zombified old villains and Cornelius ends up getting to Anne. Before all of this, Anne was starting to doubt her decision to marry the headmaster so she asks the ring who her true love is and something weird happens and it shows Cornelius’s name on it so she’s been hiding it from the headmaster’s view. He reveals his identity and manages to convince her to leave with them (Betty’s also there) agreeing to her demand to give her another chance. Betty realises that Cornelius is lying to get her to leave. If you’re not sick of this love triangle yet, you will be and so they and Harry (the ex-roommates stay behind as spies) all escape with the headmaster letting them go when he can stop them. He tells Betty to remember his ring. I am so fucking convinced the author wrote the entire Anne becomes a guy and Cornelius’s best friend plotline in book 2 so there’s an explanation as to why he doesn’t hate her anymore and to continue the love triangle so that Anne’s chance of getting with him isn’t 0. But like, it totally is because no one would actually believe he would pick her.

But Anne won’t destroy the ring because the headmaster’s her backup in case Cornelius won’t love her. So they go to a safehouse for this entire relationship drama to play out. Harry’s also her guard now even though he told her that he hates her earlier because he didn’t really mean it. Princess Tora is fine now. When they arrive, they learn that Guinevere and Lancelot have always been living there and no knew except for Merlin because he put them there and Cornelius has to go work out his issues about like everything. During the trip and the stay at the safehouse, the following series of events play out and probably not in order: Betty gives Cornelius and Anne space, Cornelius is pissed but tries to give Anne a proper chance, some plotline about her talent, Princess Tora tells her how she manages to kill her villain without her prince and how that emasculated him to the point that they broke up over it and this somehow relevant but I don’t remember how, Betty starts feeling kind of ok about Anne and Cornelius getting together, Betty asks how Guinevere is fine with not being able to interact with anyone for years and she says something something about love fulfils you or whatever, Harry uses a plot device from book 1 I forgot to mention that shows an all-black wedding between him and Anne and wants Betty to get her and him together but she says that it just shows wishes and not the future, Betty realises that she’s ok with giving up her love because she doesn’t want to become Camelot’s queen.

Anyway, it all culminates with Cornelius kissing Anne and feeling nothing, so he literally tosses his sword to her and tells her to destroy the ring and then immediately runs off to kiss Betty. Anne is initially going to destroy the ring for tricking but realises only the headmaster has never lied to her so she summons him and he takes her away. And also, she feels used by Betty and Cornelius. Girl, Book 1? Book 2? Also, you couldn’t have just fucking stayed until she destroys the ring, Cornelius. I think he’s made up with the Lancelot and Guinevere by this point and now he and Betty finally get together but for real this time really.

They start preparing for war. Betty’s the leader for narrative parallels with Anne who’s the queen of evil now. Anne tries executing her ex-roommates for being spies as she’s now ultra-evil now but Merlin saves them at the last minute. The old and young pair up to defeat their old villains with several of the villain kids team up with the ones that killed their parents. Cinderella is with Betty. Cinderella is ugly, fat and unpleasant because why are you surprised at this point. She has tough time getting along with Cinderella but they eventually see eye to eye. An the true story of Cinderella is that her stepmother was evil but her stepsisters weren’t and she was forced into becoming a princess because her prince loved her since their school days and he killed her stepmother and stepsisters. I am not even going to re-complain about how the lore works. Anyway, the last battle takes place in a forest and Merlin has gotten all the students on their side with Lady Ivy’s help because she was a double agent because good and evil are like yin and yang.

Now for the stupidest fucking plot twist in this series, Betty and Anne were twins all along. They found this via the dead blind history professor’s magic device after they each were separated from their armies. And this was so unnecessarily convoluted. Betty’s mother used to be an evil teacher but she was pretty and wanted to fall in love so the headmaster was interested in her. Meanwhile, Anne’s mother was bitter and jealous that Anne’s father loved Luella, the most popular boy in school- uh, I mean village. She was plain, this shocks Anne who remembered her as beautiful, and didn’t have blonde hair like Anne. She tried befriending them to get between them but she failed so she wished for a way to make him love her. This coincided with Betty’s mother running away from the headmaster and she heard her wish so she was able to go to the village. Anne’s mother made her make a love potion that would only last for a day which she used to rape Anne’s father and managed to get herself pregnant. He took responsibility for that but he never stopped loving Luella. All her babies died in childbirth and he started to hang out more with Luella even though she was also married. So she panicked and asked Betty’s mother for another potion. She managed to give birth to twins, one ugly with her features and one beautiful with his features. She told Betty’s mother to get rid of the ugly one but she took her as her baby because she was her one true love (familial). But it didn’t work, Anne’s father still didn’t look at her so she tried to make herself look more like Anne with beauty products. There’s this little scene where he smiles at little Betty playing. She eventually gave up getting him to love her and died of a broken heart. Betty’s mother also tried to make herself look like Betty so she could pass as her biological mother. This is why the third book is more than a hundred pages longer than the others. Why was this necessary? Couldn’t they just be given some generic backstory that’s also intertwined with each other instead of whatever this is. Sometimes, boring is better. I also feel like this is when the ship died though I won’t blame those who only watched the movie to ignore this. As much as I loathe Anne, I genuinely think that she and Betty had the most strongly written relationship. I know, the bar is on the ground but there’s nothing better.

After learning this, Betty tries to get her to come back but this just reaffirms her belief that only the headmaster could ever love her. Anne runs away with Betty chasing her, but they get separated again. Cinderella gets killed by her undead stepmother while she was attempting to reconcile with her undead stepsisters, and this caused the barrier to the village to be broken. The headmaster takes Betty’s father and tries to get Betty to kill him with Excalibur (Betty and Cornelius got captured) because this was like the last condition to get eternal victory for evil. In his evil speech, he implied that this village exists in a bubble, with no one who exists outside the village. And this has haunted me for years, way more than it should, because literally how does this village exist with no trade and no new blood with two kids taken every 4 years. The village is small so incest? And everyone in the series has acted that there’s something out there other than this village. Questions that will never be answered aside, Betty tells her that she will always have their friendship which makes her switch sides and finally destroys the fucking ring. He dies and all the undead go back to being dead.

In the midst of that nonsense, Anne’s father learns that Betty’s his daughter and he’s like, I always cared for her and felt this mysterious affection for her. NO YOU DID NOT! I don’t care if you smiled at kid her in the flashback, that is a retcon and loads of people smiled at kids, ugly or not. You casually disparaged her in Book 1, and you straight up threatened her to save Anne in Book 2 with zero care for her well-being. You could tell he felt that everything that happened to Anne was somehow Betty’s fault in Book 2 and early on in Book 3. You could easily tell that he loved Anne but he showed nothing resembling care for Betty. You know what, I take back what I said. His and Anne’s relationship was the one that was written the best and most consistently actually. But all the fairytale characters all disappear from the village before anything more could happen so whatever.

They coincidentally find Sedric fatally wounding Lady Ivy, with Professor Fairy (the good teachers were locked in dungeon all this time by the way) killing him right after. And Lady Ivy wasn’t mad at her for killing him?? This confused me because this kind of goes against the grain for most villain parent-child relationships in the series and also one of the few details we know of her character, which was that she did loved him even though she abandoned him. Also, why does this plotline. Like was this necessary? Sedric barely does anything in the two books he was in. We only know that he is hot, sadistic, evil in a bad way and hates his mother. Reading the wiki tells me he is more relevant posthumously in the next few books but I don’t care, what exactly does his presence contribute in the two books he’s in? Anyway, before she dies, she tells Professor Fairy and Anne and Betty her first name, something that she always kept mystery. Because Professor Fairy and her are supposedly best friends even though we don’t see much of their relationship and Anne’s like her protégé, that she cares about and Betty’s just there. We also barely see her and Anne’s relationship. I cannot stress how little Lady Ivy and Professor Fairy appear despite them being important to the plot. I know her and Professor Fairy’s relationship are meant to parallel Anne and Betty’s but I thought a major part of Book 1 was how special and unprecedented their relationship were and I think this just undermines that especially with how little it was utilised. And also, the mentor-protégé parallel is kind of weak here with her basically doing nothing in Book 2 and Book 3 (except stabbing her best friend’s son) and her role as mentor kind of being relegated to Cinderella. Anyway, they say goodbye to her before she dies. Other students also die but no one with any substantial screen time so who cares and Cinderella was the only old hero who died. Who we honestly didn’t know much of so again, another case of no one we care about die.

The school goes back to being good and evil. But, Betty and Cornelius prepare to go to Camelot, along with Guinevere and Lancelot because Cornelius managed to work out his issues earlier. Anne is supposed to go with them but just before they leave, she finds out that Lady Ivy made her the dean of evil in her will so she stays behind, having finally found a place she belongs. And also some character development at last because when Harry asks her out, she says no because she is complete as herself. And Anne and Betty parts ways. This sounds like a really nice and touching moment. If only the build up to it was actually good. A mentor-protégé relationship we barely see, Anne sucking at evil both as a student and teacher-literally the most unqualified person to be the dean of evil and did she even enjoy being in the school of evil? This story should have ended at Book 1.

And so, for a year or so, I thought this series was over. I did see a spinoff book for what happens to the school after Book 3 but I didn’t read it because I swore I would never buy a book from this series again but I wasn’t bothered by its presence. Until, a little over a year later after seeing that spinoff book, I see Book 4. It was the start of a sequel series and it made me so mad because I wouldn’t have bought Book 3 has I known. I did remember in Book 1 that we were told that education at the school was 3 years of schooling and 1 year of questing but I really thought Book 3 was the final one with how final it felt. And as I’m writing this, there’s also a prequel series.

I actually read a bit of the spinoff when I was in the bookstore, just a few chapters. So here’s stuff I want to highlight. Anne is a terrible dean like we all knew she would be, with narcissistic decorations and events about her. She knows nothing about teaching. She also changed the evil uniform which isn’t bad by itself, but she made it to honour the headmaster. She’s literally learned nothing other than that she doesn’t need romantic love. Also, she also holds some bitterness towards Cornelius. So much for that best friend plot, I guess? All that effort to make it to complete the “love triangle” was all for nothing. Also, feminism is a thing now (no more gendered classes for good and a feminist society was set up in the fairytale world) and you can apparently change schools if you don’t’ want to be good or evil and be the opposite instead? Which kind of makes the messages of Book 1 and Book 2 even more confusing. It’s honestly hard not to read the message that you can’t change from being good or evil and Book 2 just seems to say that if you even slight disrupts traditional gender roles, the world goes to ruin. Something I managed to stumble across about the sequel books were that the background prince who asked Genevieve, that good girl who was a mean girl in Book 1 and shaved her head in Book 2, to the ball is Cornelius secret half-brother?? And what do you mean that the new antagonist is the son of the headmaster and the dean of girls from Book 2??? And what do you mean he has a secret twin brother???? Is the author trying to get a secret family reveal every book?????

Okay, I’m done complaining. And to whoever read this from beginning to end, why? I wrote this for me to vent my hatred so it’s barely coherent. Why did you subject yourself to this.

#email submission #fandom problem 6720 #book problems #the long problem

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