#i was like 9 years old when i was doing this dungeon. when it was current content!

[wp100]

forge of souls is my favourite wrath of the lich king dungeon

The aesthetic and music is just.. Amazing. The last boss is hilarious, and Bronjahm... yeah he's like half the reason.

[lgbtlunaverse]

This page from the adventurer's bible makes me want to cry

Like basically any neurodivergent dungeon meshi fan, I see a lot of myself in the Touden siblings. But I was blindsided by just how much I suddenly related to Falin in this little comic from the adventure bible's complete version.

It's about the Touden siblings' differing relationships with their parents, and why Laios still holds their treatment of Falin against them, while Falin herself doesn't.

We know that Falin was isolated and ostraziced by their village after she saved Laios from a ghost, displaying her uncanny affinity for magic. Her parents, instead of defending her, sent her away, which angered Laios so much he ran way himself before Falin even left for magic school, hoping to make a living so he and Falin could live together alone.

He tells Marcile this, but when she goes to Falin, she says she sees things differently. Her father sent her to magic school to protect her form the rest of the village without having to cause a conflict. He didn't explain that, and we actually see her burst into tears when he says it.

But, well... Laios was gone for a year before Falin went to magic school, and everyone else in the village avoided her. The understanding Falin has with her parents to me looks like one borne out of necessity, she literally didn't have anyone else to talk to.

And this is where we get to the page that made me want to cry

Like I said, I relate to the Toudens because I'm neurodivergent myself. that feeling of suddenly realizing you're disliked, but not knowing what you did wrong or what you should have done instead? Yeah... that's one I recognize.

When I was around 9 years old, the same age Falin is in this comic, a bunch of kids in my class decided to make a "game" where you lost if you touched me. It was basically the 'cheese-touch' from diary of a wimpy kid, except I always had it and couldn't pass it along. They'd pretend I was poisonous or disgusting and run away from me screaming or gagging. The point was to make fun of me. But my autistic little 9 year old ass thought "Oh I get it! It's tag but I'm always it!" So I... played along. Running at a boy and having him fall on the ground screaming in fake pain because you tapped him is, in isolation, pretty funny.

It wasn't until months into the "game" that I realized it was meant to be meanspirited. That the reason I was the one who was always 'it' wasn't an arbritrary rule but the whole point. Because I was weird and gross. I wasn't in on the joke, I was the punchline.

Falin may have come to understand her parents' intentions, but she didn't always. The adventure bible actually tells us that she at first didn't even notice that the rest of their village disliked her. She clearly knows now, but she had to be told. So when her mom tried to exorcise her, she just saw it as an activity she got to do with a mother she usually didn't get to spend much time with because of her poor health. It's only Laios who notices something is wrong.

(Sidenote, Laios being hyper-aware of people's poor attitudes towards Falin but completely blindsided when he's in the same spot, like with Toshiro, is also very relatable as an eldest sibling)

It probably also took Falin months, until after her brother had left and she had no one but her parents, to realize why her mother had been doing all those things.

And I know they're not the same. Even misguidedly, Falin's mom was trying to help her, not make fun of her like those boys in my class. (Though, as a queer person who also cares a lot about the queercoding in Falin's storyline, a parent trying to 'exorcise' their child of a fundamental part of them the parent thinks is evil or corruptive? yeah... that's not perfectly wholesome)

But do you know what I did, when I finally figured out the game was always meant to make fun of me?

To me, it looked like I had a choice.

See, those boys eventually figured out I didn't understand that they were being mean to me. I'd laugh every time I managed to catch one of them, I was visibly having fun. And while it no doubt only made me more of a weirdo in their eyes, they never informed me that I shouldn't be enjoying myself. That the point was for me to feel hurt.

So now that I did know, I had a choice. I could either get upset, and let the insult land as it was supposed to. That wouldn't stop them, because making fun of me was the original goal. Or I could ignore it and go on as usual. They had already accepted that I didn't get it, and they weren't gona stop me from having fun, so why should I?

And the thing is that I had... one friend, in that whole class. One person who actually liked talking to me and hanging out with me. I was lonely. And the 'game' provided me with another social interaction, mean-spirited as it was, that I desperately needed. And it was so delightfully simple. Navigating actual friendships as a kid with autism and adhd was so fucking complicated, and I'd never know when I might break an inivisble rule. But I knew the rules to the game perfectly!

Sometimes, if I was chasing one of them, the others would trap him and hold him down so I could tap him. In those moments it actually did kind of feel like I was playing with them, rather than against them. And it didn't change much, they didnt start actually liking me. But they were willing to roll with the fact that I wasn't upset, and I took advantage of that because I needed to.

So you can look at Falin seeing the best in her parents as her being naïve, but I look at this page and I see myself, at first unable to differentiate between playing and being made fun of. And then later, when I did see the difference, deciding not to get mad about it because that'd mean losing that social interaction, and I couldn't afford to.

Like I said, Falin probably first realized this in the year she spent with her brother gone, and everyone else avoiding her like the plague. If she refused to talk to her parents, like Laios did, she'd have no one left.

I see a lot of people relating to the fight between Laios and Toshiro. that frustration when you realize someone you thougth was your friend actually hates you, and they never said anything, never gave you a chance to fix it because you had no idea that you were even doing something wrong! And I can see that, too. But sometimes, when people don't fully hate you, it feels better to go along with the pretending. Because adressing it won't fix it. Because the problem isn't a specific behaviour, it's you. And if they're willing to tolerate you, despite the fact that it's you, then you'll take it. Because other people do hate you, so this is the best you'll get.

[athenamikaelson]

Klaus Mikaelson x Reader!Soulmate x Elijah Mikaelson PART 9

Word Count- 5.5k

Warnings- Swearing, reader going through A LOT, slight self harm, violence

In and out. In and out. In and out. Oh god, why isn’t this working?!

“Y/n, just take a deep breath,” Elena says from her seated position on the dirt-covered ground of the Salvatore’s creepy ass dungeon. 

“Oh, thank you, Oh Wise One for that great advice,” I sarcastically shoot back to her as I continue my pacing. Back and forth, back and forth.

“Why are you so nervous? I thought you liked Elijah?”

Her question has me rubbing my hands over my face in exhaustion as I try not to roll my eyes at my best friend. When she called me asking to hang out this morning I thought “Oh cool girl time!” What I didn’t expect was us resurrecting a one-thousand-year-old vampire. But now that I’m thinking about it, that’s on me. When it comes to Elena it’s highly unlikely that her days don’t include something that is going to get either one of us maimed or murdered.

“It’s not Elijah I’m worried about,” That’s a slight lie. Ever since Elena told me she’s going to wake him up I’ve felt nauseous, “I’m worried about the two vampire brothers that are obsessed with you and are totally going to murder me when they find out I went along for this stupid ride!”

Elena shoots me an Are you serious look, “They’re not going to murder you.”

I shoot her back the same look, “Oh so you’re telling me that Damon Salvatore is going to be oh so okay with this little plan of yours? Is that why you haven’t told him?”

At that question, Elena sighs. She opens her mouth to reply but a sharp inhale from behind me has me jumping in surprise, and Elena quickly rises from her seated position. 

I turn around to see Elijah gasping for breath, his skin still grey and veiny and the suit he’s wearing has definitely seen better days. Elena kneels down next to him and I walk behind her as Elijah looks at Elena like he doesn’t know who she is. 

“Katerina,” Elijah leans on his elbows and then he must’ve noticed my presence as he glances up at me. His already wide eyes somehow open more, “You!”

I flinch back at the familiarity in his eyes as he searches my entire frame frantically. 

“No Elijah, it’s Elena,” Elena gestures to herself and then to me, “and Y/n.”

This knocks Elijah out of whatever stupor he was in as he leans his head back onto the dirty ground and seems to fall unconscious. Elena glances at me over her shoulder and I just shrug my shoulders, not really knowing what to do in this situation. I watch wearily as she leans down closer and flinches backward as Elijah abruptly rolls to his side yelling. I fight the urge to gag as I hear his bone cracking as he roughly stands himself up. 

“I can’t, I can’t breathe,” Elijah says distressed and then he falls back towards the ground huffing, “What’s happening to me?”

Elena and I just watch speechless and in the blink of an eye Elijah flashes forward but ends up knocking into the wall. If this was any other situation I’d probably be laughing my ass off. I watch as Elena jumps up and helps him stand I come up behind them and hold onto Elijah’s other elbow to stabilize him.

“I can’t…I can’t be in this house.”

I frown as Elena realizes what’s happening, “You’re not invited in.”

“Then get me out of here.”

Elijah thrusts himself out of our grips and flashes upstairs hastily. I run behind Elena and stop as we come to the front door where Elijah is hunched over. We walk over to him but Elena puts out a hand to stop me from going any further. This seems to worsen Elijah’s already angry mood as his eyes darken at my friend. He flashes forward but the invisible supernatural barrier stops him.

“What happened,” Elijah speaks but Elena shushes him. Elena may have the survival instincts of a toddler, but damn the girl is ballsy. 

She gestures to her ear to let him know that we could be heard, “I’ll tell you. Not here. Can we trust you?”

Elena’s question has Elijah raising a brow and then glancing at me momentarily before turning back towards her, “Can I trust you?”

Elena nods before handing over the silver dagger to Elijah, who slowly takes it.

I should really stop answering Elena’s phone calls. 

—

Ten minutes later, the three of us are driving to the Mayor’s house. Elena is driving while Elijah is in the passenger seat drinking from a blood bag. I have been fighting the urge yet again to gag ever since Elena pulled out the first one for him. But, the blood seems to be doing him good since his veiny skin has almost returned to its once-normal color. I am currently watching the two from my position in the backseat of Elena’s car. The entire car ride has been filled with tension as Elijah glares at Elena and the ladder only sends him sheepish looks in return. Elijah has not once turned to glance at me like he would before he was daggered. Before I was annoyed with his staring but I think I’m now more annoyed by him not staring. God, I need to get a grip.

Elena pulls over puts the car in park and turns to Elijah, “You look better.”

“Where did you get the dagger?”

“I’ll tell you everything. But we have to work together, Elijah. I need your word.”

“Your ability to make demands has long passed.”

Elena nods, “No demands. I’m offering you my help. And in return I want yours.”

“And why should I even consider this?”

“The same reason you haven’t killed me. You need my help to kill Klaus. And I need you.” 

Their conversation is interrupted by Elena’s phone ringing. Uh oh. Elena answers the phone but I’m unable to hear who’s on the other end. But from Elena’s voice, I’m going to assume it’s Stefan. 

“Yes, I’m fine…. He’s right here... No Stefan, Elijah, Y/n and I need some time alone… Yes, Y/n is here aswell.”

At this, I lean forward towards Elena’s phone, “Hey Stefan!”

Elena looks at me, “He says Hi.”

I smile to myself and lean back in my seat.

Elena looks over at Elijah, who I now realize can hear everything Stefan is saying so I’m the only one who doesn’t know what’s going on. Typical. 

“Elijah is a noble man, Stefan. He lives by a code of honor. I can trust him. He knows that I’d be incredibly stupid to betray him again. By removing the dagger, I have proven myself… It’s my decision, Stefan. Please respect it. And make sure that Damon doesn’t do anything stupid.”

I snort at that because I just know Damon is indeed going to do something stupid. 

“I’ll be in touch,” And with that, she ends the call. 

Elena and Elijah stare at each other for a moment before he places out his palm for her phone. She sighs as she gives it to him and I almost laugh until Elijah’s hand comes towards me. 

“Seriously,” I groan but am not met with a response. Asshole. I feel like a child getting her toys taken away as I toss my phone into Elijah’s palm. Elijah puts the phones in his suit. I wonder how many pockets he’s got in that thing?

“He’s here,” Elena’s words have me sitting up in my seat.

“Klaus is here?”

“He’s taken over Alaric’s body.”

“Of course he has. It’s one of his favorite tricks.”

“He’s quite the people person,” I say sarcastically under my breath, but Elijah must’ve heard it as he whips around in his seat and his eyes widen as he looks at me.

“You met him,” His tone has a tinge of worry and I just nod slightly. 

“Well ya, he taught my history class, not very well might I add, and I think I called him an asshole at one point. I don’t understand how you were able to spend years with him. One afternoon with him and I’m already planning his demise.”

“Did he hurt you?”

My eyebrows furrow and I shake my head, “Other than my ears. No. He said I wasn’t on his hit list. Do I remember that right Lena?”

Elena nods from her seat. 

Elijah stares at me before his eyes trail to my right thigh for a split moment. I frown at him before he turns back in his seat. 

“What are his other tricks? What is he gonna do next? You’re the only one who knows him,” Elena asks Elijah.

“Yes, I do.”

—

“Great, this lady,” I say under my breath as Ms. Lockwood opens her front door for us. Elijah sends her a warm smile that is quite clearly fake. 

“Elijah, Elena, what are you doing here? What happened,” Shes asks and I fight the urge to tell her I’m here too. 

“I’ve had a bit of an incident, Carol. I’m hoping you could help.”

“Well, I’m on my way to a meeting, so I-”

Elijah steps forward, “We won’t take but a minute of your time.”

After a moment Carol’s face brightens, “Of course. Anything you need.”

He thanks her as we walk through the threshold of the house. 

“Well, first things first. I’m going to need a change of clothing.”

“Well, we can try one of my husband’s suits. I haven’t boxed them up yet.”

“Wonderful.”

Ms. Lockwood walks away and Elena turns to Elijah, “How did you know she’s not on vervain? 

“Cause I’m the one who got her off it. Right before you and your friends killed me, twice. If you’ll excuse me. I’ll be done in a moment.”

Elijah walks off and Elena and I stare at each other, “Well this seems to be going well,” I say sarcastically and Elena rolls her eyes.

—

I hold the glass of water in my hands tentatively as I watch Elena watch Elijah who glances around the parlor we’re currently sitting in. I’m sitting next to Elena on a sofa while Elijah sits on a chair across from us. 

“So, I assume the Martin witches are no longer with us.”

“No,” Elena says softly, “I’m sorry.”

“And Katerina. She would’ve been released from my compulsion when I died.”

“Klaus took her. We think that she may be dead.”

Elijah smirks, “I doubt that. Not Klaus’ style,” To which I nod my head in agreement. If some crazy guy has been tracking her for over 500 years I doubt he’ll give her a quick death.

“Death would be too easy for her after what she did.”

“I don’t understand. You say that you want Klaus dead. But you still made Katherine pay for betraying him.”

“I have my own reasons for wanting Katerina to pay. There was a time... I’d done anything for Klaus.”

“Were you guys like dating or something,” I ask which has Elijah turning to me with a disgusted look. 

“No, we were not…” He pinches the bridge of his nose, “dating. Klaus is my brother.”

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. 

I sit here with my mouth hung open as Elena seems just in as much shock as I am, “I heard that. I’m still processing.”

“Yes, I’m a little behind on the times But I believe the term you’re searching for is O-M-G.”

Elijah just sips his tea as he watches both of us go through the stages of shock.

“Y/n sweetheart, close your mouth or you’re jaw will start hurting,” I slowly close my mouth at Elijah’s words and he watches me with a smirk. 

—

“There’s a whole family of Originals,” Elena asks Eljjah as he goes to stand by the unlit fireplace. I stare at the fireplace and go back into thought of the other night. Staring at the lit embers of the Salvatore’s fireplace and the red-hot rage I felt when I believed that Klaus had killed Bonnie. There’s been moments in my life where I’d felt angry or upset about things but never in my life had I felt that amount of anger. Just thinking back to it has me clenching my fists in my lap. I’m not an angry person. I’m not a bad person. So why could all I think about was making Klaus hurt?

“Y/n? Are you listening?”

I look over to see Elena looking at me wearily. I stare at her blankly and then look to Eijah who is already staring at me. He looks down at my clenched fists and his lips move downwards. 

“What were you saying,” I ask Elijah trying to sound nonchalant as I place my hands under my legs. 

Elijah stares at me for a moment almost unsure before he clears his throat, “My father was a wealthy land owner in a village in eastern Europe. Our mother bore seven children.”

Elena stands from her seat, “So your parents were human?”

Her question has me wanting to roll my eyes. What an idiotic question. I make myself uncomfortable with that thought though and how cruel and unlike me it was.

“Our whole family was. Our origin as vampires is a very long story, Elena. Just know…we’re the oldest vampires in the world. We are the Orignal family. And from us all, vampires were created.”

“Right, but Klaus is your brother. And you want him dead?”

“I need some air. I’m still feeling a tad… dead,” He walks past Elena and I towards the front door, “Come.”

I take a deep breath as I stand up and walk behind Elena and Elijah. Hoping a walk in the fresh air will clear my thoughts. But when I look down at one of my opened palms I freeze. Raising my hand I see four red fingernail cuts with slight specks of blood around them. My eyebrows furrow as I look at the wound. Did I just do this to myself?

“Y/N, are you coming,” I look to see Elena standing by the threshold waiting for me. I nod as I put my injured hand in the pocket of my sweatshirt and put that under “Problems for another day” slot.

—

“So as you’ve seen’ nothing can kill an Original. Not sun, not fire, not even a werewolf bite. Only the wood from one tree. A tree, my family made sure burned.”

“That’s where the white ash for the dagger comes from.”

“Yes. The witches won’t allow anything truly immortal to walk the earth. Every creature needs to have a weakness in order to maintain the balance,” Elijah responds as he leads us through the garden at the Mayor’s house. I trail behind him and Elena not feeling exactly ecstatic for yet another history lesson.

“So the sun can’t kill an Original. Why is Klaus so obsessed with breaking the sun and moon curse?”

Elijah smiles, “Right. The curse of the sun and the moon. It’s all so…Biblical-sounding don’t you think?”

Elijah looks at both of us oddly, “What’s so funny?”

I listen with eyebrows drawn together as Elijah tells us about the time years ago when Klaus drew the drawings for the curse.

“I don’t understand…Klaus drew the Aztec sketches about the curse?”

“Roman scrolls, African tribal etchings and any other culture or continent we felt like planting it in.”

Elena still seems confused, “But why?”

“Easiest way to discover the existence of a doppelganger or get your hands on some lost, lost moon stone is to have every single member of two warring species on the lookout.”

“So it’s not Aztec at all?”

From the smirk on Elijah’s face and the oddness of this all I’m going to take a wild guess here, “It’s a decoy isn’t it?”

Elijah seems happy with my connection and nods his head, “The curse of the sun and moon is fake. It doesn’t exist.”

We walk with Elijah some more before he starts talking again, “Klaus and I faked the sun and moon curse dating back over a thousand years.”

Elena shakes her head, “But if there’s no curse…”

Elijah cuts her off, “There’s a curse. Just not that one. The real one’s much worse. It’s a curse placed on Klaus.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Klaus has been trying to break it for over the last thousand years. And you were his only hope.”

“Well, what is this curse?’’

Elijah doesn’t answer as he reaches into his chest pocket and pulls out Elena’s ringing phone, “Your phone won’t stop its incessant buzzing. Answer it, please.”

Elena grabs the phone and answers the phone call from who I’m guessing is Stefan but her mood instantly changes to what I think is fear. I step closer to her trying to hear what Stefan’s saying but I can’t. 

“No…no,no,no…Okay I’ll be right there.”

“Elena what happened,” I ask her.

“Klaus went after Jenna. I have to go to her.”

“I’m afraid that wasn’t a part of the day’s arrangement.”

I get heavily annoyed at this, “Well obviously she didn’t plan for your brother to go after Jenna,” I turn to Elena, “You go I’ll stay here.”

Elena looks at me wearily and I know in any other situation she wouldn’t leave me alone but it’s Jenna we’re talking about here. 

“I’ll be back,” She turns to Elijah, “You have my word.”

“That doesn’t mean anything to me until you live up to it.”

Elena thanks him and with one last look at me she runs back to her car. Elijah and I stand there silently as we watch Elena’s car roll out of the driveway and out of sight. The silence is anything but comfortable as I stand still watching the road. From my peripheral though I can see Elijah now staring at me.

“God, you need to decide if you want to ignore me or stare at me,” I grunt as I start walking back towards a white picnic table overlooking the pond. I can hear Elijah’s footsteps behind me.

“You’re upset with me,” He says matter-of-factly.

I place my ass down on the seat and Elijah sits himself on the other side of the table. He watches me and I just stare at him for a moment before huffing. Honestly, I am not mad at him and I’m not sure why I’m as agitated as I am.

“No, I’m not.”

Elijah quirks a brow, “My mistake,” He smirks slightly but it drops when he sees my blank stare.

“Let me see,” He reaches his hand across the table with his palm open.

“You already have my phone, remember.”

“Not your phone. Your hand. I could smell the blood on it the second you cut yourself. Now, let me see.”

“No,” I say defiantly.

“Y/n…I just want to see it,” I look back over to him and the small smile on his face has some of the agitation I’m feeling slip away. 

I bring my hand up and show it to him, “It’s not a big deal.”

Elijah takes my hand in his and he brushes his fingers over the small wounds. He has a deep frown on his face as he looks back up to me.

“Did I make you do this?”

I shake my head in confusion, “What? Why would you ask that?”

“When I was telling my family’s history I saw how you seemed to check out. Was it something I had said?”

I stare at him and his almost saddened face for a moment before clenching my eyes and taking a deep breath, “No, Elijah. It wasn’t something you said.”

“Then what was it,” At his continuous questioning a surge of annoyance builds within me again. 

“Jesus, why do you care,” My burst of emotions don’t seem to set him off and he just sends me a small smile. 

“When it comes to you I’ll always care.”

I take my hand from his but he doesn’t move his empty one from the table between us. As if waiting for me to place mine back in his. After a moment he reluctantly brings his hand back to his person. 

“Why,” I ask him.

“You know I can’t tell you that right now.”

His shrug off has my anger bursting again and I glare down at the table in front of me.

“How long has this been going on?”

I send him a look, “How long has what been going on?”

He looks at me like I’m a puzzle with a missing piece, “The bursts of emotions and anger you’ve been feeling. I can see it clearly from your face and your body. Something’s angering you. And if you say it’s not me than what is it?”

“Why do you want to know?”

Elijah gives me a “Are you serious” look, “So I can take away whatever is paining you.”

I think to myself for a moment before responding, “Well lucky for both of us if everything goes as planned than what is paining me will meet his demise soon enough.”

At my admission Elijah sits back slightly, “You’re talking about Klaus?”

I nod and Elijah’s frown deepens, “I thought you said he didn’t hurt you.”

“He didn’t, other than a few choices words and the way he acted around me, we didn’t interact much. But he did hurt Bonnie. And when I thought she was dead all I could think about was how much I wanted him to hurt.”

I look up to Elijah waiting for whatever unnerved look he’s going to have on his face. I haven’t told anyone my thoughts about this because I didn’t want them to think I’m some violent freak but when I look at Elijah all I see on his face is understanding. 

“I understand your hurt. And I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you and your friend. Is she alright now?’’

I’m weary about telling him Bonnie’s actually alive but something in my gut tells me I can trust him.

“Ya, she’s alright now.”

“What does it feel like, this anger?”

His question has me silent for a moment as I think it over, “It isn’t like anything I’ve ever felt before. It’s like it takes over my whole body and I can’t think straight. It scares me,” I admit the last part quietly.

Elijah looks at me and his eyes show something I can’t put my finger on. He catches me staring and changes his face into one of nonchalnce. 

“What you’re feeling is normal Y/n. You’ve experienced more in the past few months than many will experience in their entire lives.”

I almost groan at the textbook explanation.

We sit there is silence for the next few moments until I see his expression change to one of slight confusion, “You said between your choice words and interactions you had with my brother? What were they?”

I think back to the day of the 60’s dance and frown, “He just stared at me weirdly in the beginning. And I went up to him asking him what was wrong, still thinking he was Ric, and he just gave me the cold shoulder and told me not to bother him. But then later that night at the dance he…kind of helped me. I guess.”

Elijah frowns and his next words come out low, “Helped you how?”

I remember the slight not heart attack I had and decide worrying anyone about that now is a bad idea, “I just choked on my drink a bit and he just made me sit in a seat and gave me some water to help.”

Elijah nods but from the look on his face I don’t think he entirely believes me, “Anything else?’’

I begin to shake my head and then stop, “When I figured out he wasn’t Ric he said something.”

“What did he say?”

“He said something about understanding now why he would like me or something like that. I don’t really know what he mean’t by that. Do you?”

Elijah stares at me and blinks once. Then twice and then once more before he slowly shakes his head. His reaction has me unnerved. And that’s exactly how he looks, unnerved. Almost spooked. And whatever spooks an immortal who can’t be killed is definetly going to make me nervous.

“Elijah? What’s wrong?”

Elijah instantly fixes his posture and leans forward, “You’re to stay away from my brother Y/n, do you understand me? Give me your word.”

At his urgent tone I frown, “Well I mean I’m not going to bring a basket of muffins to his house and welcome him to the neighborhood if that’s what you’re talking about.’’

My joke only seems to agitate him more, “Y/n.”

His voice comes out hard and stern making me instantly nod my head, “Ok, Elijah. I know.”

My agreement seems to ease him a bit. We hear the sound of a car pulling in and I watch as Elena climbs out of her car and walks to us likes she’s a woman on a mission.

“I’m sorry.”

Elijah voice has me turning back towards him and his face is now one of sorrow, “Sorry for what?”

“Back at the dinner party, I hurt you,” He gestures to my right thigh, “It was the last thing I remember doing while being daggered. And even in my comatose state it was all I dreamt about. I told you I would never hurt you and I did exactly that and I’ll never forgive myself for it.”

I’m taken aback by his confession and the look in his eyes overwhelms me. 

“It’s ok, Elijah. You didn’t know. Ric and Damon took you by surprise it’s not your fault.”

Elijah opens his mouth to speak again before Elena cuts in, “Tell us. What is Klaus’s curse?”

—-

I sit next to Elena, back on the sofa from before, as Elijah stands before us. After Elena got back Elijah guided us back inside.

  “You know, my family was quite close but Klaus and my father did not get on too well. When we became vampires, we discovered the truth. Klaus was not my father’s son. My mother had been unfaithful many years before. This was her darkest secret. Klaus is from a different bloodline. Of course, when my father discovered this he hunted down and he killed my mother’s lover and his entire family.”

My eyebrows raise at everything he’s telling us. And even though I hate Klaus, as someone with a strained paternal relationship I almost feel bad for him. Almost.

“Not realizing, of course that was igniting a war between species that rages until this day.”

Elena and I share a look, “A war between the species?”

Elijah nods, “The vampires…and the werwolves.”

Wait. If Klaus’ birthfather was a werewolf…holy shit.

“So Klaus’ real father was from a werewolf bloodline? What does that make Klaus? A werewolf or a vampire,” Elena’s question has me sitting up in my seat but a part of me already knows the answer. 

“He’s both.” 

I’m going to puke again. 

“A hybrid would be deadlier than any werwolf or vampire. Nature would not stand for such an imbalance of power. Therefore the witches, the servants of nature saw to it that my brother’s werwolf side would become dormant.”

“That’s the curse that Klaus wants to break?”

“He wants to trigger that part of him that’s a werewolf. If allowed, Klaus would sire his own bloodline. He’d build his own race. Endangering not just vampires…but everyone.”

Elena stands up but I stay seated as I try to process all this new information without puking up my lunch on my shoes. 

“But you helped him,” Elena says to him.

“I helped him because I loved him. That’s changed. Now he must die.”

“We have the dagger now. We can stop him,” Elena be so fucking for real right now. 

“When a werewolf is wounded by silver, it heals. An Original can’t be killed by anything but white oak ash on a silver dagger. So you see the conundrum. The dagger does not work.”

“What are you saying that Klaus can’t be killed?”

“There’s one way to kill any supernatural species. At the hands of the servants of nature themselves.”

“A witch. If they can channel that much power. But it would kill them.”

“The curse must be broken during the full moon. When Klaus is in transition. That’s when he’ll be at his most vulnerable. A witch with enough power…can kill Klaus.”

“What if I told you that I knew a witch that could channel that much power,” At Elena’s last sentence I’m whipping around in my seat. Is she being fucking serious right now?

“Then I would tell you there’s one more thing that you should know,” Elijah then goes on to tell us how he found an elixir that could’ve saved Katherine’s life if she’d not run.

“You found a way to save the life of the doppelganger?”

Elijah looks down at the floor, “Yes, Elena…I did,” He walks past her to come to stand next to where I’m seated, “But unfortunately, Katerina took matters into her own hands first. I believe you already know how that played out.”

“You cared about her didn’t you,” At Elena’s question I look up to Elijah who is already staring down at me.

“It’s a common mistake I’ve been told. It’s one that won’t happen ever again,” Our eyes are locked for the what seems like an eternity before he glances down at my hands and clears his throat. 

“We should be going now,” He says before he reaches his hand down for me to take. I grasp his hand and he gently pulls me up. He drops my hand as soon as I’m up though and walks towards the front door leaving Elena and I standing there in shock. 

“I need a drink.”

Elena shoots me a look, “You don’t drink.”

“Damnit, you’re right.”

—

 “Stop!”

Elijah has moved in front of me to shield me from the two buffons in front of us who are fighting each other. Elena drove the three of us back to the Salvatore mansion and as soon as we open the door we heard Yoda and the demon harassing each other. 

Elena steps down the steps towards them and I go to follow but Elijah puts out his hand to stop me. He shoots me a glance and a shake of his head. Guess I’m staying right here then. 

“Now you’ve invited him in,” Damon gawks at Elena.

“Elijah and I have renewed the terms of our deal.”

“Really,” Damon’s sarcastic voice ticks me off.

“Can’t you just listen for 30 seconds before making an unwanted comment Demon,” I yell over Elijah’s shoulder at the blue-eyed vampire.

“Shut it, pukey. I wasn’t talking to you,” Damon barely has time to finish his sentence before Elijah flashes in front of him and shoves him backwards.

“You will watch you’re tone when speaking to her. Or better yet,” Elijah picks invisible lint off his shoulder, “Don’t speak to her at all. Am I understood?”

Damon growls underneath his breath which has Elijah stepping towards him and Damon holding up his hands, “Fine.”

Elijah walks back up to stand in front of me and next to Elena as if he didn’t just threaten Damon, “The two of you will come to no harm at my hands. I only ask for one thing in return.”

“What?”

“An apology.”

A loud guffaw escapes my lips as I hunch over clenching my stomach.

“A what,” Damon’s tone only has me laughing louder and I feel Elena slightly nudge me to get a grip. I lean against the railing to catch my breath as Stefan steps forward and looks up to Elijah. 

“I’m sorry for the part I’ve played in your death. I was protecting Elena. I will always protect Elena.” 

I let out a small “aw.”

“I understand,” Elijah glances towards me. And then we all turn towards the Demon in the room. 

“Sacrifice is going to happen, Damon. Bonnie will be able to kill Klaus without hurting herself and Elijah knows how to save my life. I told you I’d find another way. And I did.”

Damon glares at Elijah, “Is that true.”

“It is.”

“And you’re trusting him?”

“I am.”

“You can all go to hell,” Damon bites out as he walks away.

“Can’t say I didn’t see that one coming,” I let out. 

Stefan shakes his head, “He’s angry with me right now.”

“Damon’s always angry at you.”

Stefan looks at me for a moment and his upper lip twitches before falling back into his tortured look. 

“But, he’ll come around.”

“Perhaps,” Elijah responds.

We all stand there for a moment before I yawn. 

“You should get some rest,” Elijah says to me. 

“I don’t really want to go home right now. Empty house and all. And since, he who shall not be named, doesn’t have to be invited in…well y’know.”

“You’ll stay here,” Stefan says to me, “For as long as you need.”

“Let’s just hope this is over soon. I don’t want to live under the same roof with that thing,” I point towards the direction Damon went, “For too long.”

[camelspit]

Fintan Pyren by @crescentpaws

Gethen Ondsinn by @lemontarto

Definition of a sexyman: An often pathetic and/or evil man who is sexy (but perhaps not in the conventional sense)

Propaganda:

Fintan Pyren:

"he's like if a chewed on and half-dead rodent was a twink" anonymous

"Okay, let's be real. Fintan is HOT. Bro's the kind of person that makes you nervous. Good or bad, whatever. And I KNOW he gets a lot of hate, but let's be real. The only reason I'd join their cult- I mean the Neverseen, is because of HIM. Like, @/maxcrescentpaws art of him.... My friend that absolutely HATES Fintan, well, after seeing some fanart...." anonymous

"twink, need i say more" anonymous

"girl idk i just am hyper fixated on this bitch and want gethen to lose by an embarrassing amount" @luigimangionesjailcell

"I love all of them in different ways, but also FINTAN 😍" @kyeiscrying

Gethen Ondsinn:

"this was a bribe. but i do find him interesting and uh. sexy? in a pathetic way? if that makes sense..." anonymous

"pathetic." anonymous

"he's evil and hot. got his fingernails frozen off. pro kidnapper™. stria is in love with him. sexy man. yes. :)" anonymous

"[Verses 1-4]

Gethen Ondsinn: a Tumblr sexyman goldmine

Blonde hair, blue eyes, cheekbones, jawline

But that’s not all, no, he goes beyond conventional

His broken nose and deranged mien are exceptional

Tried and failed to kidnap a preteen

With nothing but a dog unleashed

A pathetic failure, reduced to a retreater

By his future murder victim, the Black Swan’s leader

And when the kidnapping went successfully

He found he could not wipe her memories

He’d failed at his purpose, his craft, his skill

Pathetic failure, the plan went unfulfilled

But then, finally, he’d get to prove his worth

By being brought to Lumenaria, to his mirth

Dumped in the dungeon, where he would recharge and rest

This was where his worth would be put to the test

[Chorus]

This is why you should vote Gethen

For the sexiest of men

In the year twenty-twenty-five

This year Gethen will revive

When it comes to this decision

You should make it with precision

[Verses 5-8]

The wait was the lock, patience was the key

He knew he could wait this out, that soon he’d be free

He had the discipline, the determination, the endurance

He could pull off a feat like this, there would be no hindrance

But he had a higher aim to achieve than plain old freedom

He’d been put here for a very specific reason

For down in this dungeon, where routine was forbidden

Was also the one whose memory had been hidden

The Peace Summit would come, and everyone would see

Just how much the Council always failed to be

The great fantastic leaders they claimed to be

But more importantly, the prisoner would be freed

So it was, he thought, as Lumenaria was falling

The marvelous destruction he’d caused was nothing short of enthralling

But he realized he had one more job to do

So he freed the blade in his cell, it was time get his due

[Chorus]

This is why you should vote Gethen

For the sexiest of men

In the year twenty-twenty-five

This year Gethen will revive

When it comes to this decision

You should make it with precision

[Verses 9-12]

He saw her then, dimmed blue eyes, blonde ringlets and rosy cheeks

He raised his diamond sword, right now so clean and so sleek

To take care of the one who’d underestimated

The Neverseen’s plans, so carefully created

But then the excruciating puffy leader took out Brant

So a different death he would grant, than originally planned

Instead of a pretty head rolling on the ground

He’d have to settle for an abdomen completely gouged

He was no unfortunate villain, he was no diamond in the rough

For him, no one murder would ever, could ever be enough

And so he set forth, patting his diamond sword

He knew without murder, he would soon grow bored

His plans laid out, he knew precisely when next he’d use it

The goblins of Everglen, he would kill as a unit

His beloved sword, through soldiers it would tear

He shrugged, it wasn’t as if he hadn’t told them to beware

[Chorus]

This is why you should vote Gethen

For the sexiest of men

In the year twenty-twenty-five

This year Gethen will revive

When it comes to this decision

You should make it with precision

[Verses 13-16]

This was his trick, this was his trap

He would always tease his enemies with scraps

Of his plans, just enough to toy with his pawns, just to enjoy

The way they bumbled about to try to find out his plan and foil his ploy

As he would do now again, with the Vacker boy, he’d

Get in his head, he would pretend he could prevent what was to come, toying

Not even really a lie, such a shame they’d never cave to violence

The only way to defeat their plans, so down to a science

Like Lumenaria: he’d told them he was perfectly content

So many clues, yet they struggled to prevent

The inevitable, for the Neverseen had sent their most estimable

Candidate to lead their attack on the reputable

Or apparently reputable, he darkly supposed

After all, the idiotic Council only imposed

Arbitrary rules that nobody actually liked

So how was it his fault if he decided to fight?

[Chorus]

This is why you should vote Gethen

For the sexiest of men

In the year twenty-twenty-five

This year Gethen will revive

When it comes to this decision

You should make it with precision" @the-way-astray

Want to submit propaganda? Do so here and it will be added in the next round!

[room-surprise]

Addendum to Dungeon Meshi Age Calculations, and Thistle's age estimate...

This is sort of a sequel to two posts of mine, How to Calculate Comparative Ages of DM Characters and How Old Is Thistle?

I've seen some people claim that the age scale between elves and tall-men where elves age 5 times slower than tall-men can't be used accurately for elves that are very young or very old. I've also seen people claim that the half-foot age modifier is wrong.

I'm not a mathematician, but so far I have not seen any actual evidence that the 5:1 scale doesn't work, and a good amount of proof that it does, and I think the confusion about half-foot aging is a translation issue.

Please keep in mind, information about Marcille's age does not apply to any of this, because [SPOILERS].

WHAT ABOUT VERY YOUNG ELVES?

Here's something we know about the babies from the different races, which comes from Ryoko Kui's blog:

1 year old elven, dwarven and gnomish babies can only lay on their backs. Tall-man and half-foot 1 year olds can both stand, though the tall-man is not as good at it as the half-foot.

This lines up with real-world development milestones, human children can usually stand on their own somewhere between 9 to 12 months. Half-foots age faster than tall-men, so it makes sense that the half-foot would look more balanced and steady while standing.

A 2 year old elven baby has just gained the ability to sit up, while the babies of other races are walking or running. Normal human babies can sit up with help at around 5 months.

2 divided by 5 equals 0.4, that's 40%, and 40% of one year equals 4.8666666 months. That's 5 months.

I think it's very likely Kui herself is using the 5:1 ratio in order to calculate her elven ages in order to get this very specific 5 month developmental milestone to line up this way. So we can confirm that any elf over the age of 2 years old should have an age that is calculable with the 5:1 ratio. I also think it's not crazy to assume Kui may be using the numbers I calculated in my age post to work out other character's ages as well, since she's clearly doing it for the elves.

LET'S TEST IT WITH HALF-FOOTS

Human children learn to run between 18 and 24 months, so around 2 years old, like the chart shows us. 2 years divided by the half-foot age ratio (1.1428571429) equals 175% because they grow faster than tall-men.

175% of 2 years is 1277.5 days... Which is 3.5 years. So a 2 year old half-foot has the maturity of a 3.5 years old human child. 3 years old is when human children are expected to run and jump easily, and climb stairs without help.

That sounds about right to me, since the half-foot child in the drawing looks like they can confidently run around without balance issues. One foot is off the ground, and their arms are pulled in closer to the body than the tall-man child's arms.

Meanwhile the tall-man child is more unsteady, both feet firmly planted, standing with their arms held out as far as they can go to help with balance.

DOESN'T 29=50 FOR HALF-FOOTS?

Kui says that Chilchuck would be about 50 if he were a modern day human (which he isn't, he's a medieval half-foot), and then she says that half-foots in the time of Dungeon Meshi only live to be about 50 years old on average.

I'm pretty sure she's telling us that if Chilchuck were a human in our world, he'd be past middle-aged, and then for contrast, she tells us that most half-foots in Chilchuck's world die by age 50. Not that Chilchuck's 29 years is equivalent to a 50 year old modern human.

Chilchuck is 29 years old, and he had his first child at age 13. The average age of death for half-foots is 50, then that means middle-aged for a half-foot is 25.

Chilchuck is 4 years older than that, which makes Chilchuck past middle-aged. It does not make him developmentally the same as a 50 year old modern human though.

Using the numbers I've worked out, a half-foot would be developmentally 50 years old when they're 44.

Kui says that although Chilchuck wants to retire from going into the dungeons, if he did, it would be premature... Just like it would be premature for a 33 year old to retire.

In the real world retirement ages are connected to the average age of death. As that number goes up, so does retirement age. Because modern humans live until around 72, as a global average, retirement age is somewhere in their 60s.

So since half-foots average lifespan is 50, a normal age for Chilchuck to retire would be in his 40s.

WHAT ABOUT OLD ELVES?

The average age of death for tall-men is 60, however we know that tall-men can live into their 80s because Marcille's father did.

The average age of death for elves is 400, but they can live up to 500 years.

There's no reason to think that DM tall-men aren't like real world humans, and can't live into their 100's if they are lucky and wealthy enough. Even in the real medieval period, some people lived into their early 100's.

The thing that makes average death ages low in real life is usually issues like high infant mortality, starvation, war, lack of medical care, and lack of sanitation.

In the real medieval period, the average age of death was 30 not because people dropped dead at 30, but because SO MANY children died young that it pulled down the average. In medieval times, if you managed to live to 25, you had an average of 23 more years of life ahead of you, which is 48 years old.

I think Kui raised the average death age to 60 for tall-men to account for the fact that even tall-men have access to more advanced medicine and healing magic in DM, so infant mortality isn't as high and the adults live more than a decade longer.

The elves naturally have a longer lifespan since they live 5 times slower than tall-men. However they also probably have a far more advanced society than any of the other races in Dungeon Meshi. Fleki calls the Eastern Continent a "primitive land", and it's mostly populated by dwarves, gnomes and tall-men.

If elven culture was developmentally the same as tall-man culture, I bet elves would only live to about 300, which would be 60 for them, maturity wise.

WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

80x5 is 400. That seems correct to me, a 400 year old elf would be considered elderly and getting close to the end of their life. An 80 year old tall-man would be considered VERY old, having lived past average expectations... But those expectations, as I said before, are based on poor living conditions, not biological certainty. 100x5 is 500, so the two maximum ages (100 and 500) also line up when you use the 5:1 ratio.

POSSIBLE MAXIMUM AGES FOR OTHER RACES

Using the same math, if gnomes and dwarves had the same culture as tall-men, they'd only live to be 150-ish instead of 240/200...

This is only a theory, but dwarvish and gnomish maximum possible ages should probably be around 250, if you multiply their age modifier (2.5) x100 like I did with the elves.

The current difference between their average age of death is probably attributable to lifestyle and cultural differences (gnomes use a lot more magic, and so they live longer).

Then, just to do the rest of the races:

Half-foots and orcs theoretical maximum age is 88. Ogres theoretical maximum age is 94. Kobold theoretical maximum age is 81.

Keep in mind, these numbers are based on the idea that "around 100 years old" is the oldest a human being can get. The oldest human to ever live survived until they were 122 years old... But obviously that is rare, and happened in the modern era.

Point is, there's wiggle room at the top end of the age limit, for some of the races that may be a matter of extra days or months, for others it could be an extra decade or two. But I'm using 100 for simplicity's sake.

Sorry for the long post! I hope this answers people's questions, and if I messed something up let me know!

[ddejavvu]

hiii, hope you’re having a good day! Could you do a request with animagus reader and marauders just being out and r is in Sirius’ bag or smth and a dog spooks her and she ends up running away panicked and they just start to run after her. tysm!

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5 / part 6 / part 7 / part 8 / part 9 / part 10 / part 11

--

"Let me make absolutely sure that I am understanding you boys correctly." The stern tone of Professor Mcgonagall's voice never fails to chill the blood of those who hear it, but James Potter, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin are quite accustomed to the chill by now.

"You tore through the school's vegetable garden," She begins, "Then you trampled the roses. Then you tracked mud from those trampled roses through the Great Hall, interrupting a session of O.W.L.s that non-participating students were given plenty of warning not to disturb."

"Professor-" James starts, but Minerva snaps her gaze sternly to him.

"I am not finished, Mr. Potter, and you will not speak until I am."

He has the good sense to nod instead of giving a verbal response.

"Then. You went on a mad goose chase around the castle, that included not only breaking into faculty-only spaces, destroying art hung on these walls longer ago than you've been alive, but jumping from moving staircase to moving staircase?"

"I didn't mean to smash through that painting," Sirius offers earnestly, but when she whirls towards him, he's almost worried she'll strike him.

He knows she won't; she's like the mother he's never had, not the one that he does have.

"Fine! Fine, since you seem so eager to speak, tell me now: Why? Why was any of this necessary? Why did the three of you suddenly lose all sense?"

Sirius is rather surprised she hasn't yet noticed the lump beneath his sweater, but he's more than happy to tug at the neckline of the knitwear, "I was running after my cat, professor."

You know you'll be the only one to save them now, and you try appearing as endearing as possible as you stick your head out from Sirius's sweater, your furry ears brushing at his chin as you mewl plaintively at Professor Mcgonagall.

She blinks.

It's all she can do, because the boys in front of her are a permanent headache, and she asks, voice dangerously calm, "Why was your cat running, Mister Black?"

"She had a run-in with a wild dog," Remus explains, because if Sirius was left up to the task, he'd probably use adjectives like 'misunderstood' and 'unwillingly aggressive'. "She was tucked into Sirius's bag while we took a walk over the grounds. She likes to get out, but Sirius keeps her in his bag to be sure she's safe. But the dog must have smelled her, and he came out of the forest to charge for her. She startled and ran, and I can't say I blame her, Professor. Sirius was just worried for her, that's all. We would have really liked to avoid the chase as well."

A tense silence falls, and four pairs of eyes watch as Minerva Mcgonagall pinches the bridge of her nose between her fingers and sighs. She neglects to tell Remus that it doesn't matter whether he'd have liked to avoid the chase or not; there's a hundred fifteen-year-olds mourning the loss of their exam time.

When it's unclear what her position is on your morning escapade, you slip out of the bottom of Sirius's sweater, and pad over to sit at her feet. Sirius draws in a breath, keeps it locked tightly in his lungs as you meow up at her, and when you have her attention, your tail flicks idly behind you.

"I don't like dogs either," She laments in a voice far too exhausted for ten in the morning, "Mister Black, if you or your friends ever treat this castle like a jungle gym again, I will make you scrub out the cracks in the stone dungeon walls with a toothbrush."

He tries not to grin, because his luck is far too strained, but he nods eagerly, "Yes ma'am. Thank you, Professor."

"Do not thank me," She glares warningly at him, "I am still tempted to feed you to wild dogs."

The boys stand, nodding at their professor as they file out of her office, but when Sirius calls you with open arms, she peers over her nose at him.

"Leave the cat," She instructs, and at his curious head tilt, she adds, "I had to listen to Mr. Filch tell me all about your antics this morning. At the moment I deserve better company."

[girl-debord]

River's 13 Punk & Metal Albums of 2024

13. Paprika - Let's Kill Punk

As one of the more conventional hardcore albums on this list, Paprika's debut LP stands out by doubling down on everything I love about the genre. The bass is rough, rough, rough, and the vocals sound like they were recorded in a storm drain, giving the album an almost-live quality. The only thing it loses points for is being so short, but even that's in the spirit of hardcore.

Favorite track: Greasy Pig Disease

12. drive your plow over the bones of the dead - tragedy as catharsis

I know, I know. Yes, Gen X followers, it's an emoviolence album. If the high-pitched vocals & aversion to capitalization don't scare you off, I think you'll enjoy how this sound is pushing the powerviolence formula forward. It is possible to be sad & kick ass at the same time.

Favorite track: arrangement

11. Traumatizer - Traumatizer

This is a 12-minute/7-song hardcore debut that won me over almost instantly. The vocals remind me a bit of early Nausea, and the bass-forward breakdowns are scratching that NJ hardcore itch that I've had since Sick Shit broke up.

Favorite track: Outnumbered

10. Paysage D'Hiver - Die Berge

Paysage D'Hiver embodies that horseshoe theory approach to atmospheric black metal--when you make something noisy & lo-fi enough, it starts to sound ambient. To put it a different way, this album has more in common with a lot of my favorite dungeon synth releases than most conventional metal. It uses repetition to its advantage & really gets that bleak, wintry vibe across. That being said, how often do I have nearly two hours to dedicate to a single album? Maybe a girl with a longer commute would rank this one a little higher.

Favorite track: Transzendenz II

9. Thou - Umbilical

It's been way too long since we had a proper Thou album. Needless to say, I was stoked about this one. Umbilical is overall less sludgy, often speeding things up for more hardcore- and grunge-adjacent tracks, but it keeps the vocal style and metal guitar sounds that Thou is so known for. It doesn't feel as thematic or directional as most of their earlier releases, but it gets at the stuff I like without being similar enough to feel stagnant.

Favorite track: I Feel Nothing When You Cry

8. Poison Ruïn - Confrere

Poison Ruïn left themselves big shoes to fill with last year's Härvest, but that's one of my favorite albums of all time, so I'm trying to cut them some slack. The new sound they bring with Confrere is a little less focused on stenchore-nostalgic riffs and has more in common with old-school hardcore. It works really well on a few notable songs--like the title track--but the rest of the album feels a bit like filler (even the dungeon synth parts, which are still pretty strong). I think there's just not enough going on on this album to turn a few great songs into a great album--but damn, those great songs really are great.

Favorite track: Execute

7. Bootlicker - 1000 Yd. Stare

I somehow missed this album when it came out in May, so when I finally listened to it a couple weeks ago, I had to totally rearrange this list to fit it in. It's worth it--Bootlicker brings an unlikely combination of clunky d-beat production & oi-tinged vocals that ended up sticking with me more than I expected it to. The band also seems to have hit its stride in using the military/military-fetish theming to maximum caustically-ironic effect.

Favorite track: Mercy Dog

6. S.H.I.T. - For A Better World

Some of the best drumming from this year in the vehicle of an extremely short lo-fi hardcore record. It feels like a Discharge demo tape performed with a sneer and stimulants. I only wish it was longer, even just that last track could keep going for 10 minutes & this might be my #1 pick.

Favorite track: Imminent Destruction

5. Lagrimas - A Life of Destruction

I've been keeping up with Lagrimas for a few years and I'm excited to say that their first LP cashes in--and improves--on everything I love about their recorded material up to this point. The grind drum licks, the lacrimose emo guitars, the post-rock song structures--it's all here & turned up to 11. The Habak features are great, but the band really stands on its own now. If I had to pick something to complain about, it would be the extended dialogue sampled in the middle of the album, but even that contributes to the overall tone. More than anything, I'm really excited to see people my age doing something new with the crust punk genre.

Favorite track: Cultural Destruction.

4. Trhä - ∫um'ad∂ejja cavvaj

Damián Ojeda's project Trhä had crossed my path before with albums that combined black metal & dungeon synth with a mix of softer electronic sounds and danceable drum machine tracks. This album, on the other hand, is much more traditional, but I find myself drawn to it because of that--it seems to descend into a primordial era of black metal where the realms of crust punk and death metal aren't so far away. Maybe that's only the hallucination of a poor traveller lost in the world of Trhä's atmospheric invention, missing her precious d-beats, but the madness this album has afflicted me with isn't going anywhere. The tremolo picking starts to sound like bowed strings & juggles minor and major keys under howling vocals. I'm totally entranced.

Favorite track: ah qältak da £ä Kado£ m £ä Nahatlav

3. POLLUTE. - Microplastics, Massive Profits

https://pollute.bandcamp.com/album/microplastics-massive-profits

POLLUTE's demo tape back in May had already put them on my list of acts to keep an eye on. This album is everything I had hoped to see from them, and so shortly after that first release too. In a genre as niche as d-beat punk, it's impressive to get so much variety on a single album--at only 20 minutes long, no less. "Castle Freaks" does something to the style I've never heard before, and I can't wait to hear more innovations like it--and that's not even the high point of the album for me. POLLUTE's got the right mix of cruster craziness & hardcore deliberateness, bringing very controlled breakdowns to their most off-the-walls tracks. It rules.

Favorite track: Cancer They Create

2. Lifeless Dark - Forces of Nature's Transformation

https://lifelessdark.bandcamp.com/album/forces-of-natures-transformation

The first time I heard this, I stood there with my mouth open through, like, the first three tracks. I just can't believe anyone is making music like this in 2024. Holy shit. The reverb-y vocals, the Bolt-Thrower-esque riffage, it's all perfect. Lifeless Dark doesn't just worship the stenchcore gods, they understand them.

Favorite track: Feeding the Light

1. Kriegshög - Love & Revenge

https://lavidaesunmus.bandcamp.com/album/love-revenge

There's nothing like a band you've never been super attached to releasing a completely flawless album. From the first note I just couldn't believe what I was hearing--it's an incredible balance of being legible and--dare I say it--catchy while being totally uncompromising on the drive of d-beat hardcore. The vocals are shouted with just a hint of a shriek that gives the lyrics an urgency unhindered by language barriers. The guitars are fuzzy and distorted but kept under tight control, passing melodies back & forth and dropping out to let the drums shine at key junctures. It's beautiful. It's Motörhead a few decades after being abducted into a post-apocalyptic alternate universe when the bloodlust has really started to sink in. I hold Kriegshög fully responsible for making me start working on a new spiky leather jacket & knocking over college kids in the train station, plus any other acts of depravity from this year not fit to print. This album has become my mantra, my pulse, my anthem.

Favorite track: Grey Agony

[jadoue1999]

Kaleidosope

Next parts: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13, Chapter 14, Chapter 15, Chapter 16, Chapter 17, Chapter 18, Chapter 19, Chapter 20, Chapter 21, Chapter 22

Summary: Billy is not having a good time and a special guest joins the duo!

Chapter 3: Special guest

Billy slowly rises to his feet, an idea clearly brewing in his mind. Agatha watches his every move, trying to anticipate what he’s about to do. She loves the chase, and she’s got plenty of time to spare, her old dungeons are gone, but she’s nothing if not resourceful. The witch briefly wonders if the kid remembers when she held him and his brother in this very basement three years ago. Her gaze is entirely fixed on him, so she notices the moment he looks at the door he created. 

Billy barely makes it two steps before she sends him crashing against the wall with a wave of her hand. He curls on himself at the pain and Agatha quickly grabs some chains that are hanging on a hook and walks back to him. She chants some quick incantation to wield the chains and cuffs together. If Billy wants to try escaping then she supposes that she’ll just have to make sure that he truly can’t escape. She used to have manacles directly bolted into the wall for occasions like this but she’s fine starting from scratch. 

Quiet anger is simmering behind his eyes and she can see hints of his powers lighting up his irises. He’s trying so very hard to control himself just to keep her from getting more of his magick. How selfish of him.

“You can’t just keep me chained like a dog,” he spits out.

“Sure I can. You wanted to be a witch.” Agatha points at his wrists. “This is how witches used to be treated.” 

She holds his gaze for a moment before turning back to her work table. She rummages through drawers and baskets to find a notebook. Despite popular belief, she is actually a thorough student, she had dozens of notebooks on all different kinds of magick she had encountered over the years. Knowledge now lost, thanks to Wanda’s little spell. She lost everything, even the notes she had taken during her time in Wanda’s hex but that’s fine, she remembers the broad strokes of it. Agatha grabs one of her many blank notebooks and smirks to herself. 

Time to begin a new project.

She opens the book to the first page and starts writing. 

‘Billy Maximoff, son of the Scarlet Witch. 16 (?) years old’ 

She pauses before writing his age, or the age he had told her. The twins had grown from newborns to 10 years old in a matter of days so who knows if he’s really 16. In the end she decides that it doesn’t really matter.

‘Powers: reality warping (activated with strong emotions). Subconsciously created the Witches Road out of desperation. Killed the Salem Seven when they attacked him.

Physical appearance: black hair, tall, goth style.’

Agatha walks towards where he’s sitting on the floor and observes him for a few seconds.

“What are you doing?” He asks distrustfully. 

“Cataloging you,” she answers as she writes ‘grey eyes’ in her book.

“Why?”

“Because the fact that you exist is a miracle. And I’m going to figure out exactly what you are.”

Her eyes are then drawn to the little black book strapped at the side of his pants. Based on their earlier interaction where he had wanted her to write down the Covenstead rule, this is his own personal spellbook or something akin to it. She crouches closer, and points to the book. “What is this?”

She goes to pick it up but Billy practically hisses at her. “Don’t touch it!”

His lash out intrigues her. “Oh? And why’s that?”

She can practically feel the anger exuding off of him. “Because it’s mine.”

A smile stretches her features at how touchy he is. She decides to drop the subjet, filing it away for a later date. They have all the time in the world after all.

“Fine.” 

He doesn’t look anything like he used to, which she supposes makes sense since their bodies were never real. Strangely enough, this Billy somewhat looks like Wanda in certain lights, especially when he doesn’t act so innocent. “Now, it’s clear that you’re not the same person you were in the hex,” she says, gauging his reaction. “So why do you look different?”

Billy not only lowers his gaze, but he also shrinks into himself in… shame it seems like? How interesting. 

“Obviously you didn’t reincarnate, since you’re not 3 years old. So you know what I’m thinking?”

He looks at her, eyes fearful and reluctant. “What?”

She grabs his chin harshly, making no effort to be gentle. “I think that you found a fresh body and moved in. Survival of the fittest.”

Even without confirmation, the guilt eating him up is enough of an answer. He looks like a scared child and some part of her feels guilty but the rage she holds against his mom is stronger. She lets go of his chin and purses her lips.

“How’d you do it?”

“I don't know,” he answers looking clueless. 

She doesn’t doubt that he’s being truthful, but that’s not the answer she’s looking for. She clenches her fist and he hisses in pain as he feels like his body is being crushed. It’s a favorite spell of hers. Agatha lets him suffer for a few more seconds before letting go.

“Want to try that again?”

“I’m not lying!” He cries out.

“That’s fine,” she shrugs. She leans forward, reveling in the fear in his eyes. “I have ways to make you talk.”

***

‘Thanks for protecting me’

William’s last text haunts Eddie. He’s been gone for a full day now and he's starting to worry. He had tried calling him earlier, only to be sent straight to voicemail. This is the last sign of life he’s had of William; a declined call. He knows he worries too much, he’s been told that countless times by his teachers, by his parents, by his friends, and by William. But his boyfriend went to a known witch’s house, and has been radio silent since; he has the right to worry. 

He tries to ignore his anxiety, reasoning that he’s probably just caught up in conversation with a fellow practitioner of witchcraft. He never really got the magic fixation, if aliens existed, why should he care about herbs and potions? But William likes it so he indulges him, just like his boyfriend listens to his rambles about the New York battle and the post-Blip battle. Their meeting with Ralph doesn’t sit right with him. Hell, the only reason he went to the meet-up was because he knew that there was no talking William out of it and his boyfriend isn’t exactly the strongest person around. If he wanted to be reckless and put himself in danger, Eddie would at least make sure that he didn’t meet a creepy stranger from Reddit in an isolated parking building alone. 

He glances at his phone screen again before shoving it in his pocket. He’s done waiting around for the other shoe to drop. Eddie drives to the Kaplan’s house, where he’s sure that William’s parents are also worried sick. He barely has the time to ring the doorbell before it’s thrown open by a frantic looking Mrs Kaplan.

“Eddie? Did you find—”

“No,” he shakes his head and he walks into the home. “But I think I know where he is.”

“Where?” Asks Mr Kaplan.

“In Westview, he was looking for someone named Agatha Harkness.”

There’s no recognition in their eyes, and he wasn’t expecting it either. “Why did he go there?”

William has explained to him why, has explained to him how lost he felt, and how he has pretended to recover for the sake of his parents. He can’t betray him now. “I don’t know, she’s apparently a really well known witch so I guess he wanted to meet her to ask questions?”

“How long ago was that?”

Eddie bites his cheek, feeling stupid at how long he’s waited before telling anyone. “About 24 hours.”

The Kaplans are confused for a few seconds before Mrs Kaplan goes to grab her phone. “We have to call the police. He could be in danger!”

He lowers the phone. “Or he could be sharing knowledge with someone just as passionate as him and they just lost track of time.” The answer doesn’t convince them as much as he doesn’t convince himself but that’s all he has right now. “I’ll go check on him, I promise I’ll bring him back to you.”

“Eddie—”

He doesn’t let them say anything before he heads to the door. “If I don’t give you a sign of life within the next three hours, call the police. I’ll send you the address.”

He hurries down the street to his car and heads to Westview. The drive isn’t too long, about 30 minutes, but once he’s in the town, he doesn’t really know where to go. Thankfully, Westview isn’t that big of a town, so he decides to roam the residential streets. It takes 10 minutes of directionless wandering before he spots William’s car. The light blue Subaru is parked in front of an empty plot of land with nothing but the foundation of a house. There are graffiti on the concrete that curses a certain Wanda, probably the same Wanda Ralph had talked about, probably Wanda the Avenger. He’s definitely on the right track then. 

A knock on his window nearly makes his heart jump out of his chest. He turns to see a tall black man in a bathrobe asking him to roll down his window, so he does. 

“Can I help you?” 

Eddie briefly looks at William’s car. “I’m looking for someone, he went to find someone named Agatha.”

The man straightens up at the mention of the woman. “I know an Agatha. This person you’re looking for, is he skinny? Dressed in dark clothing? Curly hair?”

“Yes! Yes!” He perks up at the surprisingly accurate description of his boyfriend. “Where did you see him last?”

He points to the house next to the foundations. “This is Agatha’s house. Just… be careful okay? She can be a little… unconventional. We all recovered differently from Wanda’s spell and I don’t know if she ever did.”

He promises to be careful and the man lets him be. He parks in front of the house, right behind William’s car, and takes out his phone to text Agatha’s address to the Kaplans. While nothing seems too suspicious now, he’s not taking any chances.

“Let’s go investigate the totally not dangerous witch house,” he tells himself before getting out of the car.

The house looks normal, it’s not made out of candy for one so that’s one witch stereotype that can be knocked off the list. He rings the doorbell. He waits about a minute before a middle-aged woman opens the door with a look of annoyance on her face.

“Who are you?”

He does his best to look friendly and relaxed. “I’m Eddie. It’s going to sound weird but uh, my boyfriend William went to find you the other day and I haven’t heard anything from him in a while. Is he still with you?”

The woman’s eyes brighten up with some kind of emotion he can’t place. She smiles but there’s nothing warm about it. “He is! I’ve been showing him my spellbooks and my supplies. We just lost track of time. Let me take you to him.”

She guides him inside the house and the door slams behind him with a deafening sound of finality. What has he gotten himself into?

***

Next time: Agatha's got an advantage and she's sure to use it to its full potential.

Tag list: @trampledore @hannah-0730 @fyregrl @lanfear-is-my-darkmistress @lover12345abcde @astronglywordeddm @tiredwitchmachine @lesbiifem @agathaallalongg

[shy-blue-blossom]

Adventure with Big Brother

Sinbad

After Badr left, Esra gave birth to a baby girl, which Badr never got to meet, or know. She was a very hyper young girl, just like her older brother. She had the same purple hair as Sinbad, but e/c eyes that Esra thinks she got from a distant relative. That was ten years ago. Sinbad is now 14, and his little sister is 9. While Sinbad was away getting things for the village, she was helping her mom around the house with the cooking and everything else she could help with. Sinbad decided to come back when she was out. He had also brought a guest home.

"Sinbad!!!" She called out when she entered the house to see him back from the ports.

"Y/n!!!" He called back when he saw her mustard-coloured dress coming through the door.

"Where have you been?" He asked her as he hugged her close and tight.

"I was helping the village people." She said with a grin on her face.

"That's good," Sin smiles at her, "Did you help them a lot?" He asked her.

She nodded her head and then looked toward their mother with a smile on her face. Sinbad put her down, and she ran to their mother to hug her as tightly as she could until she fell asleep in her arms. The next day the army came to get Sinbad, but he refused to go with them. However, Esra convinced Sinbad to go and do it for himself. He did it for her and to get a better life for his family.

But...

He didn't think that he was going to be in the dungeon for two months. When he got back, Esra was worse than ever, but she was just happy to know that Sinbad was off doing what he should have been doing for a while now. She passed on, and Sinbad was left in charge of caring for y/n. The village decided it was best if y/n stayed with Sin even if he was travelling all over the sea. They were both happy with that decision. When they reached the Imuchakk tribe, Sin made sure to keep y/n a safe distance from the beast. However, he couldn't do much to protect himself when he went into the dungeon. When he came back, she was the first one he went to.

"Have you been a good girl?" Sin asked her when he had her in his arms.

"Yes! Ask anyone!" She said as she gave him a massive grin, and he knew she was telling the truth as everyone was laughing with her.

He introduced her to everyone new, and she greeted them like old friends. They all did the same, not only because she was Sinbad's little sister but also because she was too adorable for them not to. They all celebrated joining forces until they had to start their next adventure across the sea.

Sinbad knew that there was a long adventure ahead of them, but he wouldn't let anything happen to his family especially his little sister, y/n.

The end.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Masterlist

[soupthatistohot]

BSD: An Absurdist Analysis - Chapter 9

How We Help Others

[Masterpost]

(Please note that this analysis is my first after updating my definition of the philosophy of the absurd, which has altered my understanding of the subject)

This chapter opens with Atsushi and Kunikida debating the fate of Kyouka. Kunikida demands she be handed over to the police as a known assassin of 35 people, where she will inevitably be put on death row. Additionally, if she returns to the mafia, she will be inevitably murdered for her betrayal. Atsushi is hesitant to turn her in, though, after having saved her in the previous chapter and seeing her humanity. 

Kunikida then argues on behalf of Atsushi’s self-preservation, claiming “I am not telling you to ignore the plights of the unfortunate. But in the world we live in, such misfortune is prevalent. Consider yourself a one-man boat. If you try to save someone you cannot, it will sink both of you.” This prompts Atsushi to internally question why Dazai chose to save him.

Essentially, Atsushi is being challenged as the absurdist protagonist. Kunikida is actually arguing on behalf of those who give in to the absurd reality. He basically says that the world sucks and we can’t save everyone, and while he has a point in terms of Atsushi’s self-preservation, he is ultimately suggesting that Atsushi give up on saving Kyouka because she’s a lost cause. 

This conflicts Atsushi, whose instinct is to help others — and as of right now, it is quite literally his reason for living. If he fails to save Kyouka, what does that make him? Especially after Dazai went out of his way to save Atsushi and give him a purpose. 

So what does Atsushi do? He stalls. He takes Kyouka out for a fun day in Yokohama rather than going straight to the military police as Kunikida ordered him to. It’s a rebellion against the idea that she’s beyond saving and serves as a reminder to the reader that Kyouka may be an assassin, but she’s also a thirteen-year-old, a rebellion against the absurd idea that a child should be sentenced to death.

Kyouka isn’t blind, though. She eventually leads Atsushi to the police station, intending to turn herself in… and then Akutagawa appears. 

Kyouka was bait. She won’t be punished for her betrayal, as this was the plan all along, unbeknownst to her. For Kyouka, it’s absurd — just when she thinks that she might be able to face her crimes by turning herself in, Akutagawa comes along to drag her back into the darkness. 

Meanwhile, Dazai has been “captured” by the Port Mafia and is locked in a dungeon, where Akutagawa comes to visit him (note that this takes place before Akutagawa sabotages Kyouka and Atsushi). 

This scene is the first time the connection between Akutagawa and Dazai is directly addressed, revealing that the latter trained the former during his time as a PM executive. Dazai very much slips back into his old ways here, criticizing Akutagawa harshly — complaining about how difficult he was, calling his ability useless, and claiming that Atsushi is ultimately better than him, goading Akutagawa into beating him multiple times. 

It’s interesting to see here how differently Dazai deals with Atsushi and Akutagawa, both his protogés. I don’t know for sure if he’s already planning to make them the new double black at this point, but I’d bet that he’s starting to. This is likely because at the current moment, Akutagawa’s reason for living is to impress Dazai, and Dazai knows this, so he’s trying to detach himself from being Akutagawa’s objective by pitting him against Atsushi.

I want to acknowledge here that while Dazai’s ultimate objective with Akutagawa is making him better, his methods are extremely dubious. While in the PM, he was verbally, physically, and psychologically abusive. Now, he tends to be more manipulative and cruel than anything else. This hits at the morally gray trend in BSD where no character is entirely “good” or “bad” — and this is reflective of the absurdity of our reality.

We try to assign black and white labels to everything, but that’s not how things work. Dazai can be striving to better Akutagawa, but use malicious, cruel methods to do so. This does not excuse his methodology, but can help us better understand his internal moral compass and character development. 

As always, please feel free to contribute to the discussion! Thanks for reading :>

[Previous] [Next]

[dragonclaw29]

Top Ten Manga

It’s been a minute since I last uploaded a top ten of any kind, Grad school will do that to you. However, now with my studies almost over I thought I would revisit my top ten manga and see what new titles have amazed me! 

-Note I am not including Webcomics so if you want Manhwa and the like let me know and I will make a separate list. 

10. Sakamoto Days

Starting off with a bang we have Sakamoto Days. In a world of assassins even a mild mannered fat store clerk could be a tough challenge. That is definitely true for Sakamoto the former top assassin in Japan. Watch as Sakamoto is targeted by Esper's, Triad members, and old friends as he battles to protect his home and his daughter. It’s a fantastic read and great for the action lover and comedian a like. 

9. Claymore 

Claymore tells the tale of an elite class of women tasked to fight off monsters who plague the land. Clair the last member of this group must protect the peace, her new friend Rakka, and her self. However, dark secrets lurk in this world and the shadowy organization that dispatches the Claymores may not be as kind as they appear. 

8. A Story about a Droid 

I debated about including this because it is such a short read. But it is also a very good and cute read. This story is about a droid who finds a baby and decides to take care of him. In order to care for the child the droid puts on a human disguise. The story follows the droid and her child as she raises him in a post apocalyptic world. 

7. Berserk

RIP Muria I will always be heartbroken that you passed before finishing this wonder of a story. This manga has always been one of my favorites and for good reason. The art is fantastic, the story is gripping, and the characters are dynamic. However, this manga is shocking, cruel, and depressing- not for the faint of heart. 

6. Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki Kun

Monthly Girls Nozaki is the tale of a girl in love. Chiyo has been in love with Nozaki for a while and she finally decides that she has had enough. Working up the courage she confesses to him, only for him to give her an autograph. Turns out her class mate is world famous in the realm of shoujo manga and has never been in love. Chiyo’s confession goes right over his head leaving her dumbfounded but not hopeless. This manga is a great romantic comedy including some of my favorite characters in fiction. Definitely worth a read if you want to laugh a night away. 

5. Dungeon Meshi

Have you ever been playing DnD and been like “hmmm I wonder what a Mimic tastes like?” If so I have the manga for you! Dungeon Meshi or delicious in dungeon follows a group of adventures as they venture into a dungeon to save the main character Laos’s sister. However, with no supplies they are forced to eat their way through to survive, much to the disdain of the party except for Laos he loves it. 

4. Sousou No Frienen

We all know elves live a long time but sometimes it doesn’t hit an elf until they have seen their old comrades fade away. Frenen is old even and has wandered the world in search of rare magic, and I mean rare not necessarily useful. Only after being recruited to aid the hero’s party and defeating the demon king does she come to realize that human relationships are complex and that time is fleeting. This is a great fantasy manga with great magic and quirky characters as I write this I am rereading the manga for the fourth time. 

3. Yotsubato!

Man aren’t five year old's hectic little animals?! Yotsuba is a young girl in a new neighborhood who isn’t afraid to wander off, get into trouble, or of anything except for maybe scary statues. This manga follows her life with her dad living every day to the fullest. If you are feeling down this is a great pick me up. I reread during finals and it really helped. 

2. Tongari Boss/ Witch Hat Alter

Witches are born with the ability to use magic and normal people aren’t. At least that’s what they say but what happens when a young girl gets a glimpse at the secret of magic. What if the reason magic is solely for witches because of the great danger magic can place not only yourself but the world in. Witch hat alter is one of the best fantasy manga out there right now and I want the next chapter to come out already!!!

1. Chainsaw Man

I remember the conversation that led me to read chainsaw man years ago. It went something like 

“Hey dude you should totally read this manga it’s badass!”

“Really? What’s it about?”

Insert a few seconds of silence 

“Well.. It’s about a dude who turns into a chainsaw and kills devils” 

“That’s insane” 

“Trust me it’s sooo good you have to try it! It has a section where he rides a shark into battle while on fire!” 

And with that fateful line I decided to give it a read. All I can say is thank you for telling me to read it because I love this manga. It is so funny, and crazy, and sad, and mind bending, and so many other things. I never thought a story about a dude who literally has a chainsaw growing out of his face would make me cry but life works in funny ways. 

Well that’s my list. I hope you find some of these recommendations helpful. If you have any questions, or want more let me know!! Have a great Summer!

[cravingpepsimax]

would you like to hear about by stancest fankid bc she's gnawing on the bars of her enclosure right now and i can tell you're in a mood. jk im telling you anyways because i dont have a stancest sideblog

her name is stella pines and TECHNICALLY she's not related to either of them. and fords technically her stepdad. she ran away from home and was a feral forest child until stan was able to lure her into the mystery shack with beef jerkey. she also got Ghost Cursed but she doesn't talk about that :) Ghost Curse makes her basically albino but she just rolls with it. she's goth now. hell yeah. (Ghost Curse does more shit but that would be a whole other essay that im too tired to write rn. tldr; shes a lot more animalistic and feral and morally dubious than most people. ford has almost an aneurysm when he meets her bc Ghost Curse.)

stan found her when she was 9, around 10 years before the events of Gravity Falls. he Does Not Know where she came from and she Will Not Share. he named her stella because she didnt tell him what her name was prior to The Forest and so he went down a list of baby names until he found one she didn't bite him over. he's still not sure if it was her name or not (it wasnt)

stan explained her to gravity falls by just saying that he hooked up with a lady in vegas on a trip a while back and now the kids staying with him. This Is My Daughter. Put That DNA Test Away.

she figured out stan was lying about something pretty quick and by the time she was 11, she knew (basically) everything. she really really wanted to help but stan shooed her out every time she tried because "it's dangerous" and "you could get hurt" and "it's a lot of math, you'll probably get bored" and stellas just like "dad. i have disemboweled and devoured something thing that i'm only half sure was an animal using only my teeth when i was five years old. Let Me Into The Math Dungeons." and stans like "no"

she helps out in the mystery shack instead because SOMEBODY won't let her chew on wires in the basement. mabel thinks she's the shit. dipper is concerned.

when fords back shes just like "HEY uncle ford ive heard SO MUCH about you" *winkwink nudgenudge KISS HIM DAD*. when stan and ford tell her theyre dating shes like "about fucking time. do you wanna be pops or something or are you still uncle ford. youre pops now actually ive decided. anyways im crashing at wendys for the night i sure do hope you dont get this large house all to yourselves for the night with nobody to bother you when you do stuff. would be a real shame."

she has bingo nights with the gnomes every other tuesday. They Let Her Use Their Tunnels. this comes in handy.

OMG YES YES YES YESSS I LOVE HER SO MUCHHHH

one of the names for sylvan i considered was actually stellan WKAKSKSMSM

she means everything to me already . a DUBIOUS little creature getting up to MISCHIEF this is no good …

i feel like sylvan would have such a siblinglike relationship with her. they are bickering constantly but they are besties. somethin’ to do with them being feral and morally dubious. they would totally be gravity falls newest cryptids.

stella: oh, yeah, forgot to tell you: i’ve got a ghoooost cuurse *wiggles her fingers spookily* that’s where i get my white hair from!

sylvan: wish i had powers from my albinism. i’m just blind and can’t go out in the sun

stella, nodding: like a vampire.

sylvan: *raises a brow*

stella: ‘cause, you know, the sun… and… bats…

sylvan: not only are bats not blind, their eyesight is great.

stella: *rolls her eyes* ugh. remind me to never try to cheer you up again.

anon if you don’t make a stancest blog i am going to Attack you . with Hammers . i need to Communicate With You

[felixcloud6288]

Dungeon Meshi Chapter 23

And now we finally move on to the final battle with the Red Dragon.

The chapter opens up by narrating the sensation the castle town gives. It's been sealed away for 1,000 years, yet it feels as if the town had been inhabited until only recently.

Thinking back, this floor and the third floor both were in excellent condition. There was no vegetation growth or plant roots in them. This floor is under a water level, so that means something is containing the water in that level.

More of those winged lion statues.

For a moment, I thought the party split up to investigate the town because there were a few panels wit only Marcille and Senshi in shots and other panels with only Laios and Chilchuck.

No. Laios and Chilchuck were just covered by a text box. Their formation is Laios in the front, followed by Chilchuck, then Marcille, then Senshi.

The larder was most likely raided by wargs which ate only the meat in the larder. They seem to have knocked over some cheese while at it.

It's not really possible to tell the passage of time since the dungeon is underground but I can estimate a few things based on long rests.

After meeting the orcs in chapter 9, the next time the party sleeps is chapter 13, so I'd guess chapters 10-13 are all one "day". The next time the party sleeps is chapter 16. The incident with the undine likely set them back by a day and Chilchuck said it would take two days to reach the dragon back in chapter 18.

All of this is me trying to guess how old that blood stain in the larder might be. The orcs would have evacuated at least a week ago so I guess it's a reasonable amount of time for any meat the orcs were storing to not rot and for wargs to eat and leave bloodstains.

Now that I think about it, how did Senshi do business with the orcs beofrehand? He said he mostly travels between the second and fourth floors and the passage to the orc village is through a stairwell covered in tentacles and requires traveling through a lake.

Eyeballs will boil and melt under extreme heat. That's why the warg corpses don't have eyes.

Everything building up to the dragon encounter keeps reinforcing that the party is not ready to face this dragon. It really doesn't help that their previous strategies relied heavily on Falin and Shuro.

Shuro is blushing when Falin casts a ward on Laios. Meanwhile, Marcille seems annoyed at him crushing on Falin.

Namari always seems to get into the most danger and is the most gung-ho to fight monsters in every flashback. That encounter with the red dragon really changed her outlook things. Her chat with Kiki and Kaka last chapter was her speaking about her own of recklessness and near-permanent-death experience.

My guess on the inverse scale: It's where the dragon expels gas for its fire breath. It doesn't have scales at that point because it needs to expand when gas builds up.

How did Laios not connect that the damage to the corridor was likely from the dragon? He even pointed out that the dragon was about as tall as it.

Laios is tossing around some good questions about the dragon's behavior. It's very active and it's on a floor with a geometry it doesn't like. It's probably related to all the talks about how the dungeon is starting to change. Worst case, there's something even stronger below that has forced the dragon to a higher level.

Namari said adamantine can stop dragon FANGS, not fire. This will be a problem for sure.

I'm honestly surprised Senshi didn't protest them using his pot as a shield. But he did draw the line at them suggesting they use his knife.

Marcille was annoyed at Senshi's excitement to make bread earlier but it all turned around excellently by the end. It's not Senshi having a spur-of-the-moment excitement. He wanted to do his part to prepare for their fight.

The party is at a net negative when it comes to power and defense compared to last time they fought the dragon. The only thing they can say they've done better is this time they're not struggling with hunger and fatigue.

He was chewing food at the moment, but I kind of think Senshi was also smiling as Laios thanked him for all the help he's given. Just look at his cheeks. He's grinning from ear to ear.

The red dragon appears and is sniffing the air. He's probably all "Hey something smells good! Is someone cooking cutlets? I hope they saved some for me."

Just before they head out, Marcille casts a spell on Laios but she's reading a book while doing it. Marcille is not a support caster so she doesn't know how to do this without a reference.

back

[terrors-and-tables]

Strange Encounters #1

Damn it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything on this blog. Having just run my first game of Dungeon Crawl Classics (to my players who might be reading this, love you guys), I’ve realized that DCC is in need of more monsters; or rather, it’s in need of monsters repurposed from things I enjoy, including other games. That sent me spiraling down the rabbit hole of reading through the original 1e AD&D Monster Manuals and Fiend Folio, meticulously cataloging the monsters and treasure types, cursing Gary Gygax’s lack of consistency regarding how individual treasure versus “in lair” treasure is formatted, and once more appreciating what the RPG community can do, even forty years in the future, as the Fiend Folio (which is mostly a compiled list of monsters from the UK Magazine “White Dwarf”) is pretty consistently written when it comes to formatting at least.

That then led me to admiring the encounter tables in the DM’s Guide, and the use of overland encounters and treasure maps as a sort of perpetual motion machine for quest generation. Don’t need to have some haggard old man deliver a little monologue and beg for your players to help them when those greedy bastards are looting treasure maps (with more overland encounters between them and the treasure, not to mention whatever monster lair or crypt the treasure is in) and coming across pilgrimages of cultists out in the dangerous wilds.

Which brings me to my final point, that the encounter table format in the back of the 2nd Monster Manual is actually quite nice, and I felt inspired to make one today. The monsters given are for 1st edition D&D, but many of them exist in other editions of D&D, retroclones, and other fantasy games, so it shouldn’t be impossible, or even difficult, to repurpose this for your own use.

To use the following chart, just roll 1d8 and add it to 1d12, creating a large flat spot of probability in the middle of the chart, ensuring those results will be equally common

Caverns, Primeval

Roll Monster

2 Medusa

3 Demon, Type I (Vrock)

4 Ant, Giant

5 Beetle, Giant Fire

6 Norker

7 Grimlock

8 Ochre Jelly

9 Lizard, Minotaur (80%), or Protein Polymorph (20%)

10 Caveman

11 Troglodyte

12 Centipede, Huge

13 Black Pudding or Zombie

14 Gray Ooze

15 Xorn or Centipede, Giant

16 Ghoul

17 Caveman (Hero) 70% or Grimlock (Villain) 30%

18 Slime, Olive

19 White Pudding

20 Dragon, White, AN

The table above is meant for a large system of caves somewhere so remote as to be totally unsettled, and even untouched by time. Where early humankind dwells in caves, dwarves have not expanded into every nook and cranny, and the elves do not tread. Specifics and further detail on each kind of encounter are as follows:

The Medusa, likely just one, though if the caverns are truly huge enough there may be multiple, exists to answer the question of where humans get their primal fear and distrust of serpents from; it is from her, the serpentine witch that turns men to stone with a hiss and a fatal glance. The Medusa would no doubt be a known (or rumored) terror of the caves to those cavemen who live nearby.

The Type 1 Demon (the Vrock) is on the chart solely as a servant of the Grimlocks or Troglodytes detailed below, likely conjured to wage war or to serve as a guardian for something precious or of religious significance. They do not live here naturally, and will never come to such a place of their own accord.

Giant Ants have not yet overtaken the primal caves, but as some of the oldest insects, they’ve certainly gotten a head start; where they are found at all, they are found in tremendous numbers. Similar things may be said of the Giant Fire Beetles, which do not form groups quite so large, but work in natural opposition to the ants. The centipedes, of which there are many in all sorts of sizes, colors, and shapes, are kings of the cavernous arthropods, and will happily eat both.

Norkers are one of the only two humanoid races besides Humans (next to the Troglodytes). As written in the Fiend Folio, they are a primitive relative to the hobgoblin in much the same way Cavemen or Neanderthals are to humankind.

The Grimlocks that appear on this table are not actually their own species, rather they are those cavemen who in desperation, greed, or sheer malice have found acceptance in the waiting arms of Abyssal powers or Chaos lords, and among them can be found more advanced arms (such as swords and axes of strange material) and armor (no heavier than scale mail) as well as Chaotic (or Chaotic Evil) Clerics and Magic Users. “Villains” may occasionally be found, which will have the best arms and armor available to the tribe, 4 hit dice, and the spellcasting abilities of 3rd level Wizards (or Magic-Users, Shamans, or Elves), as well as a 10% chance to have a magical melee weapon (generate as if it were a magic sword, but it may be a sword, axe, mace, or spear).

The Minotaur Lizards on this table are huge, pale, broad headed lizards which creep through the caverns, eating whatever they can fit into their gullets, be it bug or man. They are plentiful enough, however, that the exceptionally brave (such as large groups of cavemen) may hunt them for food.

Perhaps more plentiful are the Protein Polymorphs, Ochre Jellies, Black or White puddings, Olive Slimes, and Gray Oozes, found all throughout the caverns amidst the many puddles of bubbling, gurgling, proto-biological crud, the primordial soup from which life emerged. Because of the frequency of such foul puddles (many of which are not such slimes), any slime encountered doubles any chance for surprise (I.E. it surprises on a 4 in 6 for most parties, 2 in 6 for those with elves, etc.). Protein Polymorphs are an outlier beside the other slimes, being dangerously clever, and capable of changing their shape and dividing their mass to appear as all manner of inanimate objects or even entire groups of creatures.

Cavemen are cavemen, it’s not that complicated. Heroes exist among them, the biggest and strongest, with up to 4+2 hit dice and saving as 6th level Fighters. These will no doubt have cavemen followers, their friends, companions, and caveman groupies.

Troglodytes exist even in ancient caves as these, and any encountered here will be marginally smarter and well equipped, perhaps these haven’t fallen as far as their more mainstream counterparts; they still bear the same stench, but are 10% more likely to possess magic items and may even have works of writing, magic, or textile art, though these will be crafted without any use for human language or aesthetics, and will thus be alien to those who find them.

Xorn, oddly enough, are plentiful compared to other places on the Prime Material. With only the fading Troglodytes as enemies, and no local industry, expansionist dwarves or modern humans, or need for currency, precious metals and gems are incredibly plentiful, so the xorn flock here to swim through stone, gorge themselves, and sometimes give strange wisdom to those who can understand it.

Ghouls and Zombies appear more often in areas controlled by the Grimlocks, as foul energies flood the caverns and animate the dead that lie there, but the ghouls in particular appear in the same way they usually do; as the result of humanoids resorting to cannibalism in the cold and lightless tunnels.

The Ancient White Dragon will always be the only one of its kind; how and when it got there, not even the Troglodytes can guess, but the weirdest and wisest (if they can be called that) of the Grimlocks may know. Regardless, it has slept here for quite a while, slumbering at the heart of a subterranean expanse of ice and stone, with cruel, simple deathtraps to guard its hoard.

I hope the above encounter table and implied adventuring location is of use to anyone. I might post more in the future :)

[thiscityneedslessfog]

I think a lot about Rise and her relationship with the stage. Her dungeon’s design is full of eyes, because she feels like all eyes are on her and she can’t stop it. I mean, hell, Himiko’s shadow form is meant to show how she feels like she barely has agency over her own body—she’s oversexualized when she’s literally a 15 year old. It’s to the point her initial Midnight Channel Episode sexualizes her and shows a distorted image of her, a major hint to the Midnight Channel’s nature.

(Actually, part of me wonders how exactly she got a decent look at that swimsuit since the clear Midnight Channel Episode hadn’t come out yet since she wasn’t in the TV yet. Was it her being in denial about that girl possibly being her? Then again, Namatame comments about seeing Yukiko smiling during her blurry Midnight Channel Episode (but that did not come from someone in a decent state of mind), so maybe they’re not total silhouettes.)

The image that focused on her chest enlarged her actual chest size to sexualize her more, since, well, breasts are often fetishized, especially larger ones, to the point women can’t go out in public without a shirt. (You’ll notice sexism and especially how it negatively affects teenagers is a huge running theme in this game… but that’s for another post).

Himiko herself is performing when she greets the Investigation Team, acting like it’s a theater performance the whole way through, the dungeon itself is a theater. Himiko’s facial expressions barely express emotion—just a wide-eyed, uncanny smile until she gets mad, then she slightly furrows her brow. I think it’s meant to make her look like a doll. Because that’s all a lot of her fans see her as.

(Can’t help but wonder if the implication is either plastic surgery or like she can’t express emotions in the way she wants because she has to be marketable, especially since these are Himiko’s ONLY two expressions)

To be honest I always thought it was deeply disturbing how even Rise’s shadow is performing. I suppose the others are in a sense too, but not to the extent Himiko is. Rise can’t drop the mask even in the deepest depths of her psyche, those eyes are still watching her very soul, and it scares her. She wants to drop it, but she doesn’t know what she looks like beneath it and is terrified of what she’ll find. Which is something Himiko calls her out on. I do not want to post screenshots of all of that so I’m just going to transcribe it.

Himiko/Rise’s Shadow: They’re all watching! All eyes are on me now![…] Aw, what’s wrong? You want to show your stuff, don’tcha?[…]This is me! This is who I really am! Not Risette, the fake celebrity! Look at the girl right in front of you! Risette? Who the hell is she?!

I mean hell, it’s seriously rubbed in by the fact in all her “complete” forms, Himiko has a satellite dish for a face. She doesn’t have a face of her own. I wonder if it’s also meant to look like a kaleidoscope because they fracture images of your reflection when you look into it and Rise talks about different pieces of her when she finally accepts Himiko, and in her Rank 9 which will be mentioned in a second.

But it’s not like she doesn’t enjoy acting and performing, as shown in her Ranks 8-11 (+ the Junes concert). I mean, she breaks down when she realizes Inoue won’t be her manager anymore, mainly because she was hurt that he only compliments her skills after she cuts ties with him. She realizes she “lost everything” because… well… she did enjoy performing. But everything that happened was too much.

And she appreciates that she can mean something to other people, like the girl who writes letters to her! I think her dynamic with this unknown girl is really sweet and interesting.

I also like how in Rank 9 she talks about self-analysis and her life as being similar to a stage, how she plays different roles and how she would use them to run from herself, things like that. It just… I don’t know, it’s hard to describe but it rings true and I’m struggling to explain it.

To be honest, she puts it in a way that kind of reminds me of how Philemon describes people in the beginning of Persona 1.

Risette is indeed Rise Kujikawa, too. I think Risette is her love of music and dance and acting, and partly her sense of selflessness since that girl kept pushing her forward to continue to want to be Risette and continue with her passion. And I like how the game shows that while being on stage has brought her a lot of pain—it’s the mistreatment and control people have over her (to the point even her diet is controlled), she does love acting and singing and everything—it’s brought her a lot of good. That girl and the ability for Rise to genuinely pursue something she loves.

okay anyways I’m insane about this cocker spaniel looking girl she’s wonderful

[darknight3904]

This Love-Prologue

Masterlist of This Love

ɢʀᴏᴡɪɴɢ ᴜᴘ ᴛᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ, ʟᴏᴋɪ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀꜱᴛʀɪ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀɴ ɪɴꜱᴇᴘᴀʀᴀʙʟᴇ ᴘᴀɪʀ. ᴀꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ʏᴇᴀʀꜱ ᴘᴀꜱꜱ, ᴀꜱᴛʀɪ ʙᴇɢɪɴꜱ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴇᴇ ʜᴇʀ ᴄʟᴏꜱᴇꜱᴛ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ ɪɴ ᴀ ɴᴇᴡ ᴡᴀʏ ʙᴜᴛ ʟᴏᴋɪ ʙᴇɢɪɴꜱ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴇᴛ ʜɪꜱ ᴀᴍʙɪᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴛᴏᴡᴀʀᴅꜱ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ʙɪɢɢᴇʀ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴀꜱᴛʀɪ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴇᴠᴇʀ ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴇᴅ.

Asgard 967 A.D. 

Frigga smiled as she watched her son quietly approach the baby in her arms. Her oldest son had wrinkled his nose when she sat him down to tell him that the baby girl would be staying in the palace with them. 

   "But why can't she just stay with her own family?" He asked.

   "We will be her new family. She is the daughter of a childhood friend of mine." Frigga replied.

   "She can just go back with her then," Thor mumbled from his spot across the room.

Frigga just smiled at her son and beckoned him closer to her and the sleeping babe. 

   "She looks funny and smells weird. Just like Loki did after you fed him that orange mush!" Thor said as he reached out to gently poke at the girl's face.

As she got ready to correct her son's insults against the defenseless baby, the doors to her chambers opened, revealing her husband. 

   "Escort my son back to his chambers. I wish to speak to my wife alone." Odin ordered the guards at his side. 

 Frigga didn't open her mouth until the doors had shut behind her son and the guards. 

   "What will become of her father?" She asked, placing the sleeping baby in the cradle she had asked a handmaiden to bring. 

   "He will rot in the dungeons for his crimes," Odin sighed "He tried denying his actions when I questioned him." 

   "What a selfish man. Only ever thinking of himself, I had warned Linnea that he would only bring her pain." Frigga said. 

   "And now she lives on in Valhalla," Odin said as he peered down at the rescued child, "If we are to keep her she will need a name." 

   "Astri. For her grandmother." Frigga smiled 

Hello, readers! This is my first book that has to do with Marvel so please bear with me. This story is not going to immediately jump into romance as I want to spend chapters developing Astri and Loki's dynamic as friends first. Also, after some intense Googling, I've gotten many different ages and birth years for Loki and Thor. So for this story: Thor 964 A.D. Loki 965 A.D. Astri 967 A.D..  In the prologue above, I imagined Thor as about 3 in human years while Loki is about 2, Astri while she is a baby here, she is not a newborn.  Imagine her to be 8-9 months old. For some parts I'll put their ages down or at least how I view them in human years for the part.  This story will begin before the events of Thor 1 and follow through the movies with Loki in them. I hope you enjoy reading! 

Astri "star; divine beauty"

-darknight3904