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kittyanonymity · 5 years ago

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Marinette is the daughter of Wonder Woman X Superman

Hey have this!!!! I was inspired by @eve-valution and their wonderful art!

Also like.... It’s really just an excuse for Mari to be ridiculously overpowered tbh; plus.... the aesthetic of this tiny adorable girl accidentally breaking things all the time, and getting super flustered over it. >.> It’s cute, ok? lol

Honestly, my original plan for this was Daminette, and this version is; but I might also make some adjustments for a Timinette version (I love them, they’re adorkable together ok)? I haven’t decided yet. ALSO this is just a basic outline; not the fic itself. I haven’t started the fic yet. Feel free to ask things though!! ALSO THIS AU IS CLASS FRIENDLY!!!

~ DAMINETTE VERSION~

So in the latest DC animated movies, they’ve been pushing Diana/Clark pretty heavily while implying that despite Clark’s attraction to Diana, he’s still in love with Lois; this is seen pretty obviously when Diana and Clark go on a date, and Lois shows up. Clark immediately puts space between him and Diana and honestly, it’s a little telling. (this is all in stark contrast to the Justice League cartoon from the 90’s/early 2000’s, where Diana and Bruce ((Wonder Woman and Batman)) were shipped pretty heavily) Talk about baby’s first OTP, am I right? XD

ANYWAY THE POINT IS THIS.

Lois and Clark are together, like they’re getting married. (somewhere in the world, Damian is turning one; this is relevant later.) One night, Superman has a ‘moment of weakness’, and him and Wonder woman bang. BOOM! Pregnant.

Diana is rightfully upset, as Clark immediately tells her this was a mistake, they never should’ve done that. He goes back to Lois, and they don’t speak outside of the Watchtower anymore. Diana does not tell him when she finds out she’s pregnant. She goes to Bruce, tells him she’ll be out of commission for up to 3 years.

Bruce is rightfully concerned, but Diana doesn’t tell him what’s wrong. He assures her she can leave; they’ll keep it together out here while she rests in Themyscira. She feels bad for not telling him, but resolves to do it later. Home she goes, to see her mom and the rest of the Amazons!

Her mother is disgusted by Clark’s conduct, but Diana has always wanted to have a child. They know it will be a daughter: it always is, Hippolyta says conspiratorially. The pregnancy is interesting, and many of the Amazons are startled at how quickly their princess can finish her projects. Hippolyta watches on in concern; her daughter has become startlingly creative during these months, and as a previous Ladybug that can mean only one thing.

Tikki will be back in the family soon.

Hippolyta says nothing about this to Diana, not wanting to alarm her daughter.

When Marinette is born with dark hair, and blue eyes there is no surprise. Diana stares at her daughter as if she is the most beautiful thing to have ever existed, and to her, she is. Marinette spends 3 years on Themyscira, learning from her mother, grandmother, and all of her many sisters. She’s an excitable child, with a penchant for marking walls with whatever she can draw. She grasps language easily, and much quicker than anyone would think possible.

But Diana has a duty. She must return to the outside world to assist the league. She thinks of the outside world, how it has taught her, hurt her, but ultimately made her stronger; and she knows that she wants Marinette to have all of that and more. So she contacts an old friend in Paris.

Sabine had left Themyscira many years prior, once Diana had cleared the way for the other Amazons to venture out. She’d fallen in love with a baker, and though the 2 couldn’t have children of their own, they were excellent people. People Diana knew she could entrust Marinette with. Sabine agreed after they discussed it extensively.

Diana would come see Marinette regularly once she was 10, giving the girl some years to mature, and come to terms with her mother’s identity. Diana assured Sabine she’d send any and all support requested, along with letters and gifts for Marinette as she grew. Diana hated to leave her daughter, but seeing as she would constantly be in danger once again, she couldn’t bear to put Marinette through that. Diana tells Sabine who Marinette’s father is, so they can be ready.

Sabine threatens to cut his dick off, which Diana laughs at. Diana and Marinette live with Sabine and Tom for a year, letting Marinette get to know and love them; and then Diana tells Marinette she has to go, the world needs her.

And Marinette just nods, giving her mother a smile.

“I know mommy.”

Good byes and I love you’s are exchanged, and after many tears, Diana finally manages to tear herself away, and she leaves. There is a hole in her heart the size of the Earth, but Diana has a job to do.

This is the world where Marinette lives now too, and she must do all she can to keep her daughter’s world safe.

Clark and Lois get married while Diana is away, and Jonathan is born; he’s only a year younger than Marinette, and 2 years younger than Damian like in canon. Clark is curious as to where Diana disappeared to, asking around, but the only one who knows is Bruce. And when Clark asks, Bruce simply shrugs.

“She told me she’d be gone for a few years. I didn’t press her for details. Everyone needs a break, Superman.”

Clark didn’t like it; he was worried. For her to disappear so abruptly… Surely she hadn’t truly loved him? Clark hates himself as he thinks about it, regret permeating him. He does his best to not think about it.

At least until Diana shows back up, 4 years later, and a little more jaded than she used to be. Bruce welcomes her back with a small smile, and a nod. Diana doesn’t even look at Clark.

And for Clark, it’s enough to just know that she’s safe. He doesn’t blame her for hating him; he kinda hates him too.

Literally none of the League know about Marinette; Diana doesn’t tell fucking anyone.

Miraculous canon happens as normal, only difference is that Lila is fucking gone after the Volpina incident. She’s gone after that, no return, nothing. I hate that girl, and honestly, I just wanna write something where Marinette’s friends love her, without the class drama. I can’t forgive the Miraculous writers for doing that to the students. Chat is still pretty pushy in his pursuit of Ladybug, but not in an exaggerated way. However, it does still cause some eventual complications that he needs to learn and grow from. Minimum bashing should be involved, and it will be centered around pointing out the toxic things he does, and him correcting those behaviors. Adrien is my boi and I love him.

ANYWAY.

When Marinette is 10, Diana shows up to see her. Marinette has known that Sabine wasn’t her real mother; Mari still calls Sabine Maman though cause like… the woman raised her, duh. Marinette loves Diana, even though she doesn’t remember what her mother looks like. Diana always remembers her birthday, and all of the holidays; Marinette has saved every letter, and gift her mother has ever sent her. She doesn’t realize her mother is Wonder Woman yet. Well, at least until she shows up on her 10th birthday. Marinette recognizes her as the heroine instantly, but says nothing; she’s seen movies, she knows secret identities are important!

Over the years, Sabine has kept Diana informed on the progression of Marinette’s… abilities. Look, the girl is a split between the Amazonian princess, and a Kryptonian. God only knows what she’ll be able to do. So far, Marinette has displayed signs of super strength and speed, and most recently flight; she’s got the enhanced senses as well, and she carries ear plugs with her when they go out. Diana is happy to know though, that Marinette has a strong sense of right and wrong. She owes Sabine a great debt of gratitude, and knows she’ll never be able to thank the woman enough for raising their (because yeah, Marinette is theirs now) daughter.

(Marinette goes to school, excited to tell everyone about her 2 mommies and her daddy. Despite Diana not being romantically involved with them…. Yet???? Maybe????? HMMMM)

After Marinette turns 10, Diana makes a point to visit every spring for her daughter’s birthday, and to check in on things. The day of Marinette’s 14th birthday, Diana steps off of the plane, and on her way to the Dupain-Cheng bakery, she witnesses her first akuma. Preparing to step in, Diana freezes when Ladybug and Chat Noir appear on the scene.

Diana recognizes Marinette on sight, and the spots are familiar. She remembers her mother, the stories of Tikki, and the adventures they had, the evils they stopped. She remembers how anxious her mother was during her pregnancy, when Diana could not stop drawing, writing, whatever she could be doing.

Marinette is a pure soul of creation, born of Tikki’s essence, and she is Diana’s daughter, an Amazon, and half kryptonian.

Diana watches her daughter fight, hands clenched at her sides. The Amazon in her demanding she see this through, watch her daughter be the fierce warrior she is meant to be; the mother in her is clawing at her throat, preventing her from speaking with the force of her panic.

And Marinette is an excellent fighter. Diana recognizes many of the moves she used to practice while they were still on the island, and they’ve been refined, polished, and put on display to show the world. It had to be Sabine’s handiwork, teaching her this. Did Sabine know she was Ladybug? No, she would’ve told Diana first thing.

Diana does not intervene, watching Ladybug win, and undo the damage.

Once the akuma is dealt with, Diana follows her daughter as she swings away and finds a quiet place to de-transform.

“My little light, you have exactly 2 minutes to tell me what is going on.”

Marinette jumps a mile, whipping around to see her mother, and then Tikki is smiling, hugging Diana’s cheek.

“Diana! It’s been too long!” Diana gives the kwami a smile.

“Hello, Tikki, mother misses you.”

Marinette is dumbfounded.

Diana explains everything, about how she knows, and why; tells her about Hippolyta, and her connection to the Miraculous. It was the most exciting and stressful birthday yet.

Diana starts making more regular trips to Paris to assist her daughter when she needs the extra help; since Diana is generally fairly good at keeping her emotions in check, it works out. Marinette works extra hard to make sure she keeps her extra abilities in check.

She uses her powers in small subtle ways; using her flight to get a better distance out of a yo-yo swing, but doing it in a way where it’s unnoticeable to the standard eye. Or using her x ray vision to avoid people she doesn’t want to see. She lets herself be clumsy, and careless with her movements in her daily life, making sure none of her friends can ever make the connection between her and Ladybug later on; before Ladybug, she’s clumsy so she doesn’t draw attention to her powers. The only one who knows she has powers is Nino.

It’s hard to explain to your childhood friend why you’re flying after all; he had been there the first time she’d accidentally used this new power. OOPS

All abilities/side effects Mari has:

-Super strength

-super senses (hearing, sight, smell, etc ((is taste usually included in this???? hm)))

-Enhanced vision (x-ray, thermal)

-Flight

-Super speed (bout as fast as Superman if she tries hard enough)

-Ladybug luck

-Martial arts/various fighting styles

-Amazon swordfighting & archery

Side effects:

-Sluggish in Winter thanks to Ladybug things; will hibernate if she gets too cold

-Has bursts of creative energy that keep her up far longer than she should be; usually crashes afterwards; these will stop as she gets older, and gets a better handle on her Ladybug powers.

-Gets sick easily during the cold months

-Kryptonite hurts her, obviously; she gets a wicked migraine, and nausea; usually her vision gets bad too.

Marinette’s personality doesn’t change all that much, really. She’s still undeniably kind, and selfless, always going out of the way for her friends. She’s a bit more vocal about her sense of justice, not putting up with bullies. Chloe gets her redemption a bit early because of this. Marinette is also not afraid to just absolutely throw down and brawl if you’re being a violent asshole. Like, damn. She is tiny, but she will miss you up.

ANYWHO.

With Diana making frequent trips to Paris, it catches Bruce’s eye, and he of course gets suspicious. The French government has been keeping the situation with the Akumas under wraps for about 3 years now, no news escaping the country. Marinette is currently 16, Diana has been helping her deal with hard to handle akumas for 2 years; Damian is 17, and Jon is 15.

So when Bruce looks into Diana’s activity in Paris, he’s startled to find little to nothing about Wonder Woman. An article briefly mentions something called an ‘akuma’ but then there’s no further mention. Instead he finds records of Diana Prince shacking up with a married couple and their daughter.

When Bruce finds a picture of Diana standing with the Dupain-Chengs, his breath leaves him. She is staring at the girl in the picture with such a proud adoring gaze, and he would have to be blind to miss the resemblance. The girl’s age lines up with when Diana left, and Bruce remembers how unusually concerned Clark had been about her location.

He’s the world’s greatest detective, and the pieces are too easy to put together.

SO Bruce Wayne does what Bruce Wayne always does.

Finds a way to get information.

He invites Francois-Dupont to his yearly student seminar, meant to help students get a jump start on their careers. They must prove why they deserve to attend, like all the schools invited, in the form of an essay, accompanied by a video of their school.

Mlle. Bustier’s class is selected as the class to make the video representing the school; Marinette and Alya volunteer to head the project with audio assistance from Nino, while Adrien offers to help with the budget. The class comes together to offer some kind of assistance or another, even Chloe, who goes out of her way to help the class plan. Marinette writes the basic video out, how it should look, what it should say.

But they need a narrator.

The class unanimously votes for Marinette.

“You know us better than anyone, Nette. It’s gotta be you.”

“Everyone knows you here, Mari; you’re the sweetest girl in the school.”

“A WELCOME VIDEO!”

It’s Alya who shouts it, grinning at the class.

“It’ll be a welcome video with Marinette showing a ‘new kid’ around!”

Marinette’s gotta admit, it’s genius; the class agrees, and planning begins in earnest now that they have a better idea for it.

All of their carefully laid plans fall to pieces when their high end camera breaks the day they need to film. Everyone is shouting, stress is high, and Rose is crying. Marinette knows she needs to do something before an akuma shows up, but then she hears a yelp, and she looks over to see a first year stumble back as Kim knocks into her. Marinette’s there in an instant, steadying the girl on her feet, and giving her a smile.

“Are you ok?”

She’s unaware of Adrien watching her with a fond smile, while he elbows Alya; Alya stops yelling at Chloe long enough to look over, and quickly take her phone out, and press record. The classes attention immediately shifts, the tension all but disappearing.

The first year nods hesitantly.

“Y-yes I’m ok. It’s just my first day here, a-and I’m…” The dark haired girl bit her lip, looking at the floor, “I’m really scared.” Marinette frowned for a moment before she smiled, and took the girls’ hand.

“I’m Marinette, what’s your name?” The girl sniffled, rubbing at her eyes.

“My name’s Bridgette.” Marinette nodded, her smile growing.

“It’s nice to meet you. Sorry about my friend Kim over there. He gets a little excitable sometimes.” Bridgette offered her a smile.

“It’s ok. It looked interesting so I wanted to get closer, but I wasn’t paying much attention.” Her eyes fell, and she looked off to the side, but Marinette gripped her hand gently, causing her to look up.

“I can show you around the school if you like. Everyone here is really nice, I promise. We look after each other the best we can, and you can always ask one of us for help.” Marinette gestures to her classmates, who offer Bridgette encouraging smiles. It’d been awhile since they’d seen Marinette work her particular brand of magic. Bridgette’s smile grew, and she finally nodded.

“I’d really appreciate that, Marinette thank you.” Marinette simply waved her off.

“It’s fine! We’ll make it fun!” She turned to her class, missing Alya hiding behind Adrien, still recording.

“I’ll be back in a bit guys. Come find me when you get the camera replaced.”

The camera panned around Adrien’s back as Marinette turned away, and began leading Bridgette further into the school. Alya hurried to catch up, the class following shortly after.

Marinette showed the young girl all around the building, from her homeroom class, and to each individual classroom so the girl would never be lost. And she talked to her, learning that Bridgette had just recently moved there from Italy, escaping her old school and the torment she’d endured there. It burned Marinette to know that someone had been so cruel to such a sweet girl, but Bridgette assured her it was fine since she wasn’t there anymore. Marinette in turn, assured her that no one at Dupont would ever treat her so cruelly. And if anyone did happen to do so, she should come find her immediately.

Bridgette laughed, flushing pink.

“Thanks, Mari!” Bridgette’s gaze grew wistful, “It’s been awhile since I’ve laughed with a friend.”

And Marinette was resplendent in her joy, pulling the girl into a gentle hug.

“We’ll look out for you, Bridgette. You can count on us.” The girl returned the embrace, nodding. After a moment, the two girls pulled back, and Bridgette smiled.

“Thanks for caring, Mari.” Marinette shrugged, giving her a smile.

“You’re worth it, Bridgette, remember that.” She nodded her head towards a classroom, “But you should probably get to class now. I think you’re really late. I’ll have a talk with Mr. Beaumont about why right after my class and I finish this project, ok? Just tell him Marinette will explain, and he should understand.” Bridgette nodded, thanking her again, before kissing her cheek, and heading to her classroom. Marinette watched her go with a smile, and sighed, before turning to head back to her class.

Only to promptly freeze at the sight of them behind her, grinning in glee, Alya at the front, phone held high.

Marinette flushed bright red.

“Guys, what’re you doing?” Alya clicked end on the recording and grinned at her best friend.

“Getting our video of course!”

Marinette was certain she was going to die. Or combust on the spot. God, what if she actually did though, and it was just another damn power to worry about???

Needless to say, she’s embarrassed. But once the class reviews the video, they find it to be perfect. They were able to stay close enough to hear Bridgette’s and Marinette’s conversation, and hear Marinette explaining things to her. Nino took the audio and boosted it in certain parts, and making sure to edit out any personal information the girls discussed during the tour.

The video coupled with the 15 page essay Marinette submits secures their spot in the seminar.

Meanwhile, when Diana hears Marinette gushing about their school being invited to the annual Wayne Seminar, she is immediately suspicious. She finds Bruce within the day, appearing in the Batcave with no preamble; Bruce is waiting for her.

He offers her a drink. And Diana sighs, because he definitely already knows; so she accepts his drink, and they sit.

And they talk.

He asks why she didn’t tell him, he would’ve helped her. And Diana laughs, and it’s surprisingly good natured.

“Bruce, you would’ve killed him back then. Don’t think I don’t know how much you two hated each other back then.” She sighed, “You idiots were finally about to be friends, and if I’d told you what he’d said, what we’d done…” She snorted, “I was quite sure you would’ve killed him.” Bruce didn’t deny her accusations, nor did he accept them.

“What’s she like?” And Bruce watched Diana’s whole body relax, a small smile on her face as she swirled the liquor in her glass.

“She is the best thing that has ever existed for me in this world. She’s my little light, and I will see that this world is safe for her.” Bruce thought of his sons, his daughters, and he nodded.

“And her powers?” Diana’s grin grew broad, and she raised her fist.

“She is strong, Bruce. The strongest.” Again, Bruce nodded, having a drink from his glass as Diana stared him down, “If you hurt her while she is in your care, Bruce, we will have problems. You know this?” Bruce sat his glass down, reaching for the bottle to refill his cup.

“I know, Diana. My intentions are purely curious, I promise you.” He smiled, a small upturn of his lips, “She was the star of their video, you know.”

He shows her the video the class submitted, edited to include the class singing the praises of their class president as an intro, before it cut to some footage taken on a cell phone. It followed Marinette around as she guided a younger student around the school, offering advice, and going out of her way to help the girl. The footage ended with the girl’s blushing face before it cut to an outro featuring the Journalist of the class, Alya Cesaire. Alya had said that since Marinette was writing the essay, she knew her friend wouldn’t include her own good deeds, and since Alya was in charge of the video, she’d take care of it here.

And Diana watched her daughter’s best friend proudly declare Marinette’s achievements, and her aspirations; the good she’d done, and the bad she’d prevented, or outright ended.

Bruce pretended not to notice Diana’s tears.

OOF I DID NOT MEAN TO WRITE THAT MUCH OF THAT WOW

Ok so anyway, trip to Gotham gets secured cause of all that. Master Fu will send Kaalki with Marinette as an assured countermeasure against akumas, and Diana promises she will stay in Paris while Marinette is in Gotham. This assures Marinette that between her mom, Viperion, and Ryuuko they could hold their own until she could get there.

To Gotham! YAY!

They land mid afternoon, check into the hotel, and fucking sleep. That’s it.

Next day, they have a guided tour of the Gotham Natural History museum, which is super dope, and everyone is excited; except for Chloe, because even redeemed she’s kind of a brat. I love her. Marinette meets Tim first in this one. Tim is at the Museum because as CEO of Wayne Enterprises he is donating something to the museum. They bump into each other, and she knocks him down.

Tim is kind of stunned cause this tiny pixie like girl just knocked right into him and didn’t even budge, holy shit. And Marinette is stumbling over her words as she apologizes, and helps Tim up, and wow, that is one hell of a grip for someone that size, what the fUCK. Tim is properly dismayed, but waves off her concern good naturedly, saying he shouldn’t have been standing in the middle of the hallway like an idiot; Marinette flushes brighter, insisting she should’ve been paying more attention.

And then Jason shows up, cause like damn Tim, what the hell is taking you so long?

Looks at Marinette.

Hey isn’t she a bit young for you, Drake?

(in another timeline this would probably be a fun Timinette AU, I won’t lie. hmmmmmmm…..)

Tim rolls his eyes at Jason’s antics, offering Marinette a grimace.

‘Sorry about him, he’s deplorable. Again I’m sorry for running into you’

Marinette laughs it off, shaking her head

‘I’m so sorry for knocking you down. I’ll make sure to pay more attention.’

Tim and Jason leave, Jason offering her a wide grin and a little wave; Marinette just shakes her head in amusement, and catches up with the class.

MEANWHILE, SOMEWHERE ELSE IN THE MUSEUM

Damian and Jon are hanging out; Jon has decided to come and pester him since his school, Metropolis Prep, is also invited to the seminar, and Damian likes his friend, he really does, but *god* he is suffering right now. Jon is making comments left and right, and Damian is about to lose it.

‘Ooh, am I making you mad, Wayne?’

Damian glares at his friend.

‘Stop talking. My head is killing me, and I am *this* close to killing *you*.’

Jon just laughs, and Damian rolls his eyes.

After awhile of wandering around, looking at things, they go get some lunch in the cafeteria. There’s a large group of French students taking up one of the tables, one dark haired girl standing while the others are sitting; there’s a map and a notebook spread out in front of her. Damian watches as she smiles at her classmates, writing things in the notebook, while marking things on the map.

‘Oh, that’s cool!’

Damian looks at Jon, ‘What?’ Jon grins.

‘They’re planning on what they want to see while in Gotham.’

‘How do you know?’ Jon rolls his eyes as they get some food.

‘Damian. I have super powers, idiot.’ Damian snorts.

‘Doesn’t explain your incompetence though.’

Both boys miss the wide eyed stare Marinette is giving Jon from her table.

She hadn’t MEANT to hear him, but when you can hear pretty much everything, eavesdropping is inevitable; doesn’t mean she has to like it though.

Also, wow that boy looks so much like her?? How weird.

She and the class finish planning other places they’d like to go, while Marinette turns the list of locations into Miss Bustier for her to review. They had a basic schedule set up, but their teacher had allowed them to see Gotham for what it was before finalizing things.

After lunch, their tour resumes, and Jon and Damian find themselves along the same path as Marinette’s class. They’ve moved past some of the older cultural items, and are entering the room of heroes and villains. Wax replicas of Batman, all of the Robins’, Black Bat, Batgirl, and various big name villains line the walls. Damian was on edge the entire time, not quite listening to Jon’s rambling.

And well OF COURSE something goes wrong, because you can’t have the Dupont kids go anywhere with no problems.

Two Face steps down from where his figure used to be, unloading his gun into the ceiling. He thinks he’ll have an easy time taking this French class hostage.

He is not prepared for these kids.

Alix and Kim tag team a couple of his henchmen with support from Max who has outfitted Markov with some new tech as well. Juleka (who has been tapped for the Lion Miraculous before) and Rose (who’s used the Mouse) take one down, while Ivan smashes two more henchmen together, shielding Mylene. Alya takes the knees out another one while Nino comes across his jaw with a hard left cross. Nathaniel is in front of Sabrina, shielding her when Chloe comes down hard on the henchman in front of them.

Adrien and Marinette go for Two Face, each of them a bit surprised at how the other moved.

And Damian is shocked stupid, watching this French class absolutely decimate one of Gotham’s finest rogues.

Meanwhile Jon is stuck staring at the duo. Between looking at the cute blonde boy, or the dark haired girl who is *WAY* stronger than she looks; especially if she can throw Two Face around one handed, damn.

And Marinette is more concerned with keeping her friends safe than hiding her abilities, and she probably moves too fast, and uses too much strength; her classmates buy her excuse of her extra martial arts classes outside of class.

Damian however does not.

And then the police show up, shocked to find this group of criminals subdued by a group of foreign teenagers.

The second Damian is out of the museum, losing Jon for a moment in the chaos, he calls his father.

“Why didn’t you tell me there was a meta among that French class you invited?”

Damian can practically his father shrug.

“It’s not my business to tell, Damian. Just talk to her.”

He growled as his father ended the call; the man knew something, he knew it.

And thus begins the chronicles of Damian trying to figure out WTH is going on with Marinette; which leads to friendship. Damnit.

This is where the typical getting to know you Daminette stuff will happen.. Including dates, and identity reveals.

The biggest conflict of this is honestly dealing with Superman when he finds out. Marinette has known who her father was since she was 10 years old, when she learned her mother’s identity; but Diana didn’t officially tell her until her 14th birthday, after the akuma incident.

“No more secrets, little light; I will tell you everything.” Diana had said; and she had.

Marinette is glad to have Tom, because wow her real father sounds like a dickhead.

When she officially meets Jon (Damian introduces them), she immediately realizes ‘well fuck, I have a little brother???? And he’s best friends with the boy I have a crush on, shit.’

Anyway, Superman finds out Diana had a daughter, their daughter, after the trip to Gotham concludes, and he immediately heads for Paris as Superman. He finds Diana as Wonder Woman talking to a young girl in Red with black spots, but Superman is set on speaking to Diana as he lands, and starts striding up to her.

“We need to talk.” Diana stares at him dispassionately as he walks up.

“I have nothing to say to you. Leave.”

Clark reaches out for Diana’s hand, only to have his wrist grabbed by the girl in red; who is glaring up at him fiercely. Wow her grip is tight…

“If you touch my mother, I will decimate you.”

And Clark is reeling, because holy shit, this is his daughter; his and Diana’s blood. And Clark just looks at Diana, conflicted.

“Why didn’t you tell me, Diana?” Diana shrugged.

“Telling you would not have changed the outcome. I have always wanted a child, and she is everything I need of this world. Why would I tell you?”

“Because she’s my blood too! She’s kryptonian!” And the girl growls, and then she is hovering in front of his face, blocking his view of Diana. Her eyes are a blazing blue behind her mask, and Clark realizes: she can fly.

“I may share your blood, Superman, but I am not Kryptonian; I am an Amazon. I am Ladybug. And I will not listen to you berate my mother for her choices. She told you to leave, and I can assure you, I won’t be as nice when I demand your absence.”

And Clark is just. Stunned. Because yeah, that was definitely an Amazonian level threat she just gave him; but he’s Superman, and yeah, she’s his daughter, but how strong could she be? Should he push the matter?

Clark watches as other heroes slowly appear behind the girl; One clad in orange, one in green; A fox and turtle respectively. Then there’s the one in black, green eyes narrowed at him; a feral cat, it looks like. Then there’s the one in yellow and rusty orange, a snarl marring her lips; a Bee?? Or a Hornet?? The final two are teal and red, a boy and a girl; a snake, and a… dragon?

What has his daughter been up to in Paris?

Grief swells within him, and he sighs.

“Ok, I’ll-”

Ladybug screams.

“Hello Superman, I am Hawkmoth.”

And that’ll be the final fight of this fic I think! They’ll beat akumatized Superman (batfam Zetas in to help, and so does Jon and Connor), and then Clark leads them to Hawkmoth’s base, and Gabriel is dealt with, along with Nathalie. Marinette and Adrien will both do university in America, with Adrien learning under Bruce about business along with Damian (the 2 become surprisingly good friends after a point), and Marinette accepted Audrey’s internship while she goes to school in New York. She frequently pops over to the manor to see the Batfam.

I’m gonna work on the Timinette version of this next; that ship is so adorkable and I *LOVE* it

There may also end up being a Jasonette version?? I haven’t decided yet tbh

#maribat #daminette #mlb x dc #WonderSuper AU #that'll be the tag for this #will I actually write it??#WHO KNOWS!#NOT *ME*!#:D #¯\_(ツ)_/¯#this AU isn't entirely Superman friendly #but it IS class friendly!!! :D #here have this!

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superman86to99 · 5 years ago

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Superman #82 (October 1993)

REIGN OF THE SUPERMEN! The climax of this 19-part storyline, the entire "Death and Return of Superman" saga, and seven years of long-ass plotlines. And it only took this blog a mere six years and six months to get here! PREVIOUSLY: After Superman’s death, five different Supermen popped up to reclaim the mantle, some more convincingly than others. The front-runner, the Cyborg Superman, kinda ruled himself out of the competition when he nuked out a whole city and replaced it with a giant engine. Now the other would-be Supermen converge in that place...

The Last Son of Krypton/Eradicator finally arrives on Engine City, having set off from the Fortress of Solitude two weeks ago. We noted back then that he suddenly looked like an old man, but he's back to Superman's age now. If this storyline had gone on any longer, he would ended up Benjamin Buttoning himself into a grumpy, ultra-violent baby.

Superboy also flies in from Metropolis. It's the fourth time he makes the Metropolis-Coast City trip in a few days (not counting the time he got a ride on a missile), so he's gotta be pretty bored of it by now.

Steel, last seen getting crushed by some giant cogs, emerges from the bowels of Engine City with his armor in tatters but his body intact. Dude’s a tough nut to crack.

Supergirl and the powerless Man in Black continue making their way through Engine City. Supergirl's like "Wanna step out and let those of us with powers handle this one, chief?" but the Man in Black ain't having it. Wow, that's pretty heroic. Maybe... maybe he's actually the real Superman?! Nah, that's crazy.

And Green Lantern Hal Jordan is also there, because this whole issue takes place on top of the ashes of his old city and childhood memories and all. We see the end of his fight with Mongul from Green Lantern #46.

The Cyborg watches as the Super-People invade his fortress from his control room, but he's a glass half full kind of guy, so he's choosing to focus on the fact that he (apparently) gets to kill Superman again.

After the Eradicator joins the party and the Cyborg reveals his true identity, the Man in Black finds himself in the awkward position of having to team up with one of Superman’s worst villains (the one who wanted to turn Earth into Krypton) to fight a good guy driven crazy by space travel (and who once looked like Johnny-5). It's only after the Eradicator goes on a two-page exposition dump about how he brought Superman back to life that the Man in Black goes "alright, guess you're cool".

The Man in Black and the Eradicator follow the Cyborg to the center of Engine City, where a giant chunk of kryptonite powers the entire fortress. The combined powers of the Eradicator's Eradicator-ness and the Man in Black's punching (OK, mostly the first thing) seem to be winning -- but then, in a desperate move, the Cyborg shoots a blast of concentrated kryptonite at the Man in Black. The Eradicator, however, heroically jumps in front of the blast...

...which has the unexpected side effect of restoring the Man in Black's Superman powers, allowing him to dispatch the Cyborg with a swift "broosh". What's a "broosh"? You know, a "broosh":

After Supergirl uses her convenient clothes-shifting powers on the Man in Black's costume, it only takes one second of him in the classic red and blue tights to convince everyone that HOLY CRAP HE'S THE REAL SUPERMAN AND HE'S BACK FROM THE DEAD! (Side note: I like how Green Lantern goes "We'll mop up here! Not like I have anything better to do, what with all my friends being dead and stuff. Haha. I-I’m okay, seriously.")

It's him! It really is him. I knew it all along. Never doubted it.

Character-Watch:

The Eradicator is this issue's real MVP. His whole arc has been about slowly turning him from an emotionless robot into a sentient being through his interactions with people (Lois, Steel, even Loose Cannon and Guy Gardner), and it pays off when he jumps in front of that kryptonite blast yelling "I WON'T LET YOU DIE [AGAIN]!".

Also, when he tells Superman "We have always been linked, you and I", that's true. While their psychic connection influenced Superman negatively for a while (the Day of the Krypton Man saga), it looks like it also worked in the other direction and some of Superman's goodness rubbed off on him. By the way, it might be a stretch but the climactic shot of the kryptonite blast always reminded me of the Day of the Krypton Man's climactic shot, with Superman finally overcoming the Eradicator’s influence with Pa Kent's help.

Anyway, sorry, Superboy and Steel. The Eradicator had the best sacrifice scene in this storyline, hands down. Of course, they eventually brought him back again and turned him into a lapdog for the Cyborg and then Zod, but let's enjoy his dignified retirement while it lasts.

Plotline-Watch:

I'm not kidding when I say that this issue represents the convergence of seven freaking years of storylines. Let's recap (strap on, this is gonna be long):

John Byrne's Man of Steel #1 (1986) introduced Superman's birth matrix, the flying artificial womb that took him from Krypton to Earth. When young Clark sees the matrix for the first time he feels weak, because there's some kryptonite lodged into it. In Superman #1, a few months later, we find out that a crazy scientist stole the matrix and used it to build Metallo, so Superman decides to leave it suspended in orbit to prevent it from being used against him again. Three years later, the distraught mind of a disembodied astronaut called Hank Henshaw jumped into the matrix, and he made himself a tiny little spaceship from its technology, then sped off into deep space. Eventually, he went mad, hooked up with Mongul, and used the DNA information he got from the birth matrix to make himself a half-Kryptonian body. Hence: the Cyborg Superman. (As for that kryptonite rock, it ended up in Lex Luthor's hands... soon to be "hand".)

Also during Byrne's run, Superman briefly visited a "pocket" universe inhabited by a Silver Age-type Superboy, who died by the end of that storyline. Months later, the pocket Earth had turned into a hellhole thanks to three Kryptonian criminals. They too died by the end of that storyline... by Superman's hand. Feeling guilty over killing those killers, Superman exiled himself in space, was captured by Mongul's Warworld, and found an ancient egg-shaped relic created by his ancestors: the Eradicator. Superman brought the Eradicator back to Earth and it built him a nice Fortress of Solitude, but it also took over his mind and turned him into the emotionless Krypton Man -- who became an entity of its own after Superman overcame it. After Superman's death, the Fortress' robots rebooted the Eradicator so he could follow his “preserve Kryptonian life” directive and restore Superman back to life, but he got a little confused and thought HE was Superman. Hence: the Last Son of Krypton.

Another concept introduced by Byrne was the idea that Kryptonian DNA is too complex to be duplicated by Earth scientists, which led to the creation of Bizarro. Byrne's World of Krypton miniseries also established that Kryptonians used clones as spare parts to extend their lifetimes, and the conflict over clone rights literally tore the planet apart. So when Superman learned of a cloning facility near Metropolis called Project Cadmus, he immediately felt uneasy about it. After his death, Cadmus got hold of his body so they could create a replacement, but, again, you can't clone a Kryptonian... so they simply created an approximation of Superman's powers and features using human DNA. Hence: Superboy.

As for Steel, he's just Steel. Hence: Steel. Incidentally, if you’re wondering why his armor has been reduced to just some metal shorts by the end of the issue, here’s the answer. Pretty self-explanatory.

The only major plotline left dangling after this issue (aside from Dr. Stratos, of course) is Lex's own death/return/cloning misadventure, but the Super-Squad will deal with that in a big way pretty soon. Oh, and then there's the mess they left for Green Lantern, but that's another creative team's problem. (SHAMELESS PLUG: Follow my new Green Lantern '94 to '04 blog to see how that mess turned out.)

Believe it or not, there's even MORE stuff to talk about in this issue, so don’t miss the great Don Sparrow's section after the jump:

Art-Watch (by @donsparrow):

In the first place I have to say that this issue is an all-time favourite of mine, probably in my top three of this era of comics we’ve been so dutifully covering. The excitement at my local comic shop for this issue was incredible, and already being the Superman fan that I was, I felt like I was on the ground floor. [Max: I also remember the excitement when I first saw this issue in my cousin’s hands after he showed it to me the day he bought it... then didn’t let me touch it, so I read it years later.]

We start with the cover, and I got the deluxe edition, with the chromium cover. Back when this issue came out, I had a love/hate relationship with Image comics. I wasn’t interested in the dark & gritty characters like Spawn and the like, and generally thought the Image books favoured flash over substance and storytelling. BUT, man, did the colouring and paper they used at Image ever look cool! So I was a bit torn about DC using a “gimmicky” feature like this—it looked amazing, but I also felt it was leaning a little far in the direction of sizzle over steak. But I didn’t mind that much, since this had been such a great story to this point. Aside from the metallic 3D look of the cover, the drawing is great, too. It was the first look at the returned Superman in the full suit, and also with the long hair present. DC must have thought that the long hair was a gamble on some level (even though we’d seen it for months in the actual issues) because they hid it from the covers for so long. [Max: This was also the cover they used in both the Spanish and Mexican editions I have, so that’s what I went with for the top of this post. The “normal” cover looks like a historic oddity to me.]

Inside the issue, we jump in with another splash page—there are a lot of these, and it really calls back Superman #75, as most of the pages have one main image, with a few small panels laid overtop. This one features another interpretation of the Eradicator, with short, non-spiky hair—it’s interesting to see these characters reinterpreted week to week. This opening page also commits the unpardonable sin of demanding that we stop reading the issue until AFTER we read Green Lantern #46. Being a naïve 13 year old when I read this issue, I of course complied with the demands of DC editorial, and read Green Lantern first, not realizing it has a near identical plot (albeit from a different point of view), right down to the “broosh” at the end, very much spoiling what is about to come in Superman #82. I remember being pretty steamed that my first glimpse of a returned Superman didn’t come in a Superman book. While I appreciate the coordination, I do find the caption misleading.

Also similar to Superman #75—it’s very hard for me not to talk about every panel or page, because this whole book is just gorgeous. The badassery from the last issue continues into this one, as Superman with his tough-guy attitude and giant gun is pretty cool. One quibble I have with this team is that when they bury Superman’s eye’s in shadow, it can have a sinister or tired look, which I don’t think is the intention. Some panels it’s more prominent than others, but in one panel on page 6 where it makes Superman look pretty rough, and a lot less handsome. We get more big gun Superman later when he starts taking it to Engine City in general, knowing it is connected to the Cyborg.

The Cyborg taking different shapes is done pretty effectively here, particularly when he forms himself out of what must be a lead-like metal to accuse Superman of a bunch of nutty stuff. The reveal of the Kryptonite heart of engine city is very well done, in part because of Eradicator’s bulging red eyes. It is a bit weird to imagine a lipless robot saying “mmm, hmm” though.

We get another great full-page splash as the Eradicator goes all-out in his effort to defeat the Cyborg. The captions here always confused me though, where it says “(The Eradicator) was built to kill…the other (the rocket that brought Superman to Earth, which the Cyborg used to create his new body) to bear new life. The victor would be obvious.” But to me, it’s not obvious. I would think that in a Superman comic, a vessel of LIFE would be the big winner over ancient weaponry, but I think the caption intends the inverse. I guess it’s saying a gun would beat a baby crib? It’s one of those passages that sounds cool, until you think about it. Or think about it excessively, as I clearly have. [Max: To be fair, a gun WOULD beat a baby crib. It would kick that baby crib’s ass.]

Superman’s haymaker knocking off the Cyborg’s jaw is an incredible visual, and there’s a subtle set-up for the great cape visual call-back that comes later.

The entire sequence of the Eradicator taking the blast of Kryptonite is well done, in particular the panel when we see Superman through the vanishing Eradicator. I’m a bit confused as to just how the Kryptonite suction thing works here—the Kryptonite meteor is shrinking and shrinking, but nothing is attached to it except for that one hose.

Jurgens and Breeding do a great job of showing the physical cost of Green Lantern going toe to toe with Mongul. It also sets up for my all-time favourite Superboy quote, one I think might be seen on this site from time to time in meme form, “Check it out! The Lantern looks so totaled it makes me want to hurl!”. This entire saga has been worth it, to get to that line. Just magnificent. [Max: I think Hal went evil because of that one comment.]

The glimpse of the burnt-out husk of the Eradicator is also incredibly well drawn—and painful looking—but even by the end of this story he seems a lot more recovered.

The scene of the returned-to-full-power Superman decking the Cyborg is a stand-up-and-cheer moment, and I love the detail that Superman is holding the cape for this whole scene. It’s interesting that as the Cyborg starts to get damaged in the fight, we see how little organic material there is. Metal seems to poke through the skin on his face, as if only a thin sheet were laid over the metal. and when Superman punches right through him, there’s really no blood or anything, just a dry, cracked crater. I had thought, up until this issue that the cybernetic parts were beside real skin and bones (as if to replace the damaged parts of Superman’s body from his fight with Doomsday), but this issue seems to posit that he’s all robot, with only a veneer of Kryptonian flesh overtop.

The normally merciful Superman is pretty blood-thirsty here, vibrating his arm fully in the knowledge it might kill Henshaw (who helpfully reminds us, he’s survived before). [Max: That moment kind of rubbed me the wrong way, and I think Jurgens himself felt uneasy with it too. One of the highlights of his recent “Rebirth” run was that Superman deliberately decides to jail Hank instead of killing him to at least give him a chance to be rehabilitated, which would be cool to see happen one day.] I love the little glimpse we get of the restored, and re-costumed Superman before the full reveal, and as a character moment, I love that he would think to show gratitude for the heroes who filled in when Superman was dead.

The next few pages are pure joy, as it’s such a treat to see our Superman soaring around in the sunshine, even with the new Tarzan haircut. It’s such a show of restraint that they didn’t pack a reunion with Lois into this issue, instead allowing a different superteam to tell that story, which very much deserves its own issue. Overall, though, I just remember feeling such a sense of joy, and relief that Superman was back, and back to full power. [Max: SPOILERS: And then some...]

STRAY OBSERVATIONS:

I do love this era of comics before swearing (or even censored swearing) was a thing, because they have the weirdest phrases. John Byrne would always have characters saying “blast” instead of “damn” to an absolutely ridiculous degree. In this issue, I don’t know for sure if “crud” is a stand-in for another word, but it does strike me as downright odd for Green Lantern to use it as a noun against Mongul. The concept of “a crud” just amuses me, though I suppose it could be meant in the same vein as “scum” or something.

Is it me, or does Jeb look like Ricardo Montalbon here? [Max: Oh crud, I forgot Jeb was in this issue! Jeb was in this issue, everyone.]

I love they don’t even give the Cyborg a moment to be cool. Just as he’s about to reveal his true identity in a villainous speech he gets clocked by Superboy, in one of my favourite moments with the character (but not my very favourite, as we’ve seen.) I also like the low-level burn that Henshaw assumes that Superman must already know who he is, but Superman’s like, nope.

I do like that this issue goes to great lengths to explain that Superman can’t just keep returning from the dead, even going so far as to say it would never work again. My pet theory is that the Eradicator’s Resurrection Matrix only worked because Pa Kent’s spiritual journey in Adventures of Superman #500 really did happen. [Max: I might be misremembering, but I think the upcoming issue of Action pretty much confirms that.]

I’m glad to see him recovered, but I kinda think Eradicator spoiled the moment a little with his observation about Green Lantern.

[Max: Blast it, Sparrow! You’ve done it again!]

#superman #dan jurgens #brett breeding #eradicator #superboy #coast city #green lantern #hal jordan #mongul #steel #supergirl #hank henshaw #jeb friedman #metal shorts #dc give me baby eradicator you cowards #reign of the supermen

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stranger-who-writes-fiction · 5 years ago

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Crisis on Infinite Earths - a Primer

So, maybe you’ve never read Crisis, and wanna know what all the fuss is about...or maybe you have read Crisis, but it’s been a while, and you could use a refresher...or maybe you’re avoiding that thing you gotta do and you’re looking for a convenient distraction. Whatever the case may be, this post aims to provide a relatively quick* and painless breakdown of the crossover comic to end all crossover comics (literally), CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS.

*It will not be quick.

Crisis on Infinite Earths is a twelve-issue crossover event comic that came out in 1985, written by Marv Wolfman, with pencils by George Perez (and inks and colors by a whole bunch of guys.) The thing most folks know about COIE is that it took the then-current DC multiverse, and merged it into a single earth/continuity. (That, and the deaths. OH, the deaths.)

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves.

CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS--THE MAJOR PLAYERS:

THE MONITOR: The Monitor is a cosmic being comprised of positive energies, who starts gathering a bunch of heroes and villains together in order to save the multiverse. He also recruits... HARBINGER/LYLA MICHAELS: Lyla Michaels was orphaned at a young age and saved by the Monitor. He raised her, and gave her the powers that would make her HARBINGER. She helps the Monitor, but also kind of screws him over. PARIAH: Forced to watch worlds die as penance for three terrible sins--he’s drawn to earths just before they perish, but can’t really do anything about it. As such, he almost always looks like Munch’s The Scream. ALEXANDER LUTHOR JR. OF EARTH-3: Son of Lex Luthor and Lois Lane of Earth-3 (the earth where the bad guys are good, and the good guys are bad.) Lex sends his son away in a pod to escape the anti-matter wave destroying their universe, and as such, Alexander has both positive and negative energies within him, making him a kind of conduit, and vital component for the Monitor’s plan.

On the flip side, we have...

THE ANTI-MONITOR: The negative entity to the Monitor’s positive entity. He uses anti-matter to destroy universes and feed off their positive energies. He’s also got his own posse... PSYCHO PIRATE: Anti-Monitor steals him from Team Monitor and uses his emotion-manipulating powers to control people on various earths, forcing heroes to fight other heroes, as well as rush towards their doom in the anti-matter waves. HARBINGER: Yes! Harbinger is briefly controlled by the Anti-Monitor, and is used to betray the Monitor and kill him.

The Anti-Monitor also has RED TORNADO and THE FLASH imprisoned on his ship.

CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS--THE EARTHS: Earth-1: The main DC continuity earth. It’s got the Justice League, the Trinity, etc. etc. Earth-2: Justice Society of America earth, home to folks like Jay Garrick Flash, Alan Scott Green Lantern, Power Girl, and Old Superman (Kal-L). Earth-3: Crime Syndicate Earth. The Justice League, but evil. Earth-4: Home of the Charlton Comics heroes. (The Question, Blue Beetle, etc.) Earth-6: Technologically advanced earth ruled by superheroes, home of Lady Quark. Earth-X: Earth where WWII has lasted for 40 years; home of the Freedom Fighters. (Uncle Sam, The Ray, Dollman, etc.) Earth-S: Home of the Fawcett Comics characters, AKA, the Marvel Family. Earth Prime: Home of Superboy.

CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS--THE PLOT: (oh boy, here we go)

- So, earths are being destroyed by a mysterious anti-matter wave. One of the first earths to perish is Earth-3, home of the Crime Syndicate (evil Justice League.) Lex Luthor, hero of Earth-3, sends his son to a different universe so as not to be killed. His pod is found by the Monitor, and Alex is taken aboard the Monitor’s satellite. - The Monitor starts to summon various heroes and villains; he sends Harbinger to get them. Harbinger splits into multiple versions of herself to go to the various time periods/universes. One of the Harbingers comes under the control of the Anti-Monitor, unbeknownst to the other characters! - Various heroes are brought to the Monitor’s spaceship, but before the Monitor can explain anything, they are all attacked by stranger creatures known as Shadow Demons. This makes all of the heroes and villains a bit mistrustful of the Monitor. - Still, the Monitor tells them that the multiverse is in peril, and that he’s set up some machines (‘vibrational forks’, I believe is the technical term) to stop the destruction. He’s going to dispatch teams of heroes and villains to protect the machines (which are placed in different universes and time periods) and activate them when ready. - There’s a whole portion here of the various heroes going to each machine, and really, it’s just an excuse to get These Characters to hang out with These Other Characters, and visit all of the various earths/time periods DC has going on. (i.e. Old West, WWII, Kamandi future, etc.) Shadow Demons arrive and attack the machines. - Meanwhile! Evil Harbinger brings Psycho Pirate to the Anti-Monitor! Alexander Jr. rapidly ages from infant to adult! And the Monitor creates a new Dr. Light! - And thus it seems like all of the pieces are in place for the Monitor’s plan to save the multiverse...BUT! Evil Harbinger KILLS the Monitor! GASP. - It’s okay, though, because the Monitor totally saw this coming, and prepared accordingly; he brought Earths 1 and 2 into a kind of pocket dimension to save them from the anti-matter wave, but now there’s a NEW problem--the vibrational frequencies separating the earths are slowing down. Soon, the Earths will occupy the same space, and when that happens, they’ll be DESTROYED! - This slowing of vibrations manifests as not only the earths merging in certain spots, but also all of time collapsing on itself--dinosaurs and cavemen run into WWII pilots and Batman. - And it only gets crazier--Harbinger, no longer under the Anti-Monitor’s control, uses the last of her powers to bring Earth-4, Earth-X, and Earth-S into the pocket dimension. So now FIVE Earths are gonna potentially merge together. - Six representatives are called before Pariah, Alexander, and Lyla. Five of them are from the remaining five earths, and one from the now-dead Earth-6. A lot of exposition follows! - In short: Long ago, the multiverse was formed, and along with it, the ANTI-MATTER UNIVERSE. That dark universe in turn gave birth to the ANTI-MONITOR, who sought to conquer all! He was kept in check by the MONITOR, his positive-universe counterpart! And then, one day, Pariah opened a portal to the anti-matter universe which allowed the Anti-Monitor to grow strong enough to attempt to conquer the positive-matter universe. This also gave Pariah his powers--being drawn to the Anti-Monitor’s destruction--which the Monitor used as a way to kind of track him. - STILL WITH ME????? - So the plan is to take the fight to the Anti-Monitor, by using Pariah to lead the way to his ship, and using Alexander as a way to transport all the heroes there. (Because, you know, comic book science.) - So the heroes arrive on the Anti-Monitor’s ship! They fight creatures which appear to be made of living stone, while Superman and Dr. Light discover a machine that the Anti-Monitor is using to speed up the merging of the Earths. Anti-Monitor finds Superman and Dr. Light, and attacks them both. Supergirl hears the fight, and intervenes. She very nearly destroys the Anti-Monitor’s outer shell/armor, but is ultimately killed. The Anti-Monitor escapes, the heroes return from the anti-matter universe, and Earth-1 mourns Supergirl. - While the Anti-Monitor is healing, Psycho Pirate contemplates killing The Flash, who is still imprisoned in the anti-matter universe. The Flash escapes, and uses Psycho Pirate to turn the Anti-Monitor’s forces against him, inciting an uprising. As the Anti-Monitor’s warriors riot, Flash finds an anti-matter cannon. He destroys it, and is killed in the process. - The earths seem safe for the moment, however, Brainiac has been collecting all of the villains previously recruited by the Monitor. They attack and conquer Earths 4, X, and S, issuing an ultimatum to Earths 1 & 2 to surrender, or they’ll destroy the other three earths. -The heroes travel to the other three earths via the Flash’s cosmic treadmill-- operated by Wally West and Jay Garrick--and fight the villains stationed there. Both sides sustain losses, and only cease fighting when the Spectre intervenes! He tells them they all have to join forces in order to stop the greater threat of the Anti-Monitor, who plans to travel to the beginning of time and destroy all life. - The heroes and villains agree to work together; the heroes travel to the dawn of time to distract the Anti-Monitor, while the villains travel to the birth of the anti-matter universe and multiverse, which occurred billions of years after the dawn of time but billions of years before the present, when a proud Oan named Krona opened a gateway to the dawn of time. - (Yeah.) - The heroes are succeeding in distracting and weakening the Anti-Monitor, however the villains fail to stop Krona from opening the gateway. Just when all seems lost, the Spectre appears once more. Using the combined powers of the various earths’ mightiest magicians and sorcerers, he fights the Anti-Monitor, and seems to win, BUT IN SO DOING, prevents the formation of the multiverse! - (Two more issues to go, y’all.) - Kal-L of Earth-2 awakes the next morning, thinking the whole ordeal has been a dream. He goes to the Daily Star, only to discover that it’s not the Daily Star, but the Daily Planet! He’s not on Earth-2--He’s on Earth-1!!!! - Except, not quite. Earth-1 has been changed, and only those heroes present at the dawn of time for the fight with the Anti-Monitor seem to remember the Crisis, and know that something is amiss! - Kal-L is anxious to return home; he, along with Clark of Earth-1, go to Jay and Wally to use the cosmic treadmill to get back to Earth-2. When they do, however...they discover that Earth-2...IS NO MORE! - All the heroes gather together again, THIS time to try and determine what’s going on. They all realize that there’s only one earth, meaning that the residents of the other earths have had their lives erased! Harbinger appears, her powers returned to her in the rebirth of the universe, and explains further. The various histories of the different earths have merged; some heroes are remembered, like Power Girl, but others are forgotten, like Helena Wayne, and Kal-L. - If that’s not bad enough...THE ANTI-MONITOR RETURNS! The skies over the new singular earth go dark, and not just any dark! A complete and total darkness that causes a panic, and turns out to be...SHADOW DEMONS! - Harbinger gathers the heroes (again) to stop the Crisis and the Anti-Monitor (again) while the Shadow Demons run rampant around the globe. Those who are caught by the Shadow Demons are erased from existence! - Meanwhile, another group of heroes, separate from the ones fighting Shadow Demons and the ones with Harbinger, stumble upon Brainiac, who agrees to take them to someone who will be able to help with this Crisis business. - Namely, Darkseid. - Harbinger takes some heroes back to the anti-matter universe to face the Anti-Monitor, while the mystic-powered heroes concentrate on the Shadow Demon problem. Those heroes in the anti-matter universe discover Psycho Pirate--and the Flash’s costume and ring, finally learning of his heroic sacrifice. - They attack the Anti-Monitor (again) who appears to be defeated (again) and Alexander serves as a portal back to the positive matter universe (again). - BUT THEN...the Shadow Demons--which had been imprisoned by the mystical superheroes--are absorbed into the Anti-Monitor’s corpse! And he lives! AGAIN AGAIN. - Alexander can’t hold the portal open much longer, though; all the heroes need to get through, or be FOREVER TRAPPED IN THE ANTI-MATTER UNIVERSE! - (We’re getting close to the end, thank goodness) - Kal-L and Superboy (the sole survivor of Earth Prime) stay behind to fight the monitor, as they no longer have earths and loved ones to return to. They’re losing, but Darkseid has science on Apokolips that allows him to not only observe the battle via Alexander’s eyes, but also launch a (seemingly) fatal blow against the Anti-Monitor! - Darkseid sends the heroes away, their tenuous truce done for now. - And then it’s over! YAAAAY!!!! - Except it’s NOT. Because GUESS WHO’S BACK, NOT EVEN A PAGE AFTER HIS APPARENT DEATH? THAT’S RIGHT. ANTI. MONITOR. - Kal-L’s had enough of this, though. He punches the Anti-Monitor so hard that the guy explodes. - And then it’s over. - Kal-L, Superboy, Alexander, and Lois Lane of Earth-2 (who was saved from destruction by Alexander, kept in a kind of pocket realm) retreat to said pocket realm, happy to live out the rest of their existence in a kind of nebulous afterlife. - Harbinger records the entire account for posterity, and conveniently ties up some lose ends while dictating the story; heroes mourned the fallen, Wally West became the Flash, etc. etc. - Lyla, Pariah, and Lady Quark decide to explore the new, singular Earth, looking to the future, rather than dwelling on the past. - EPILOGUE: Psycho Pirate is in Arkham Asylum, ranting about Infinite Earths...Worlds that lived, and Worlds that died...

CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS--THE DEATH TOLL (PARTIAL): -Dove -Flash (Earth-1) -Kole -The Losers -Solovar -Nighthawk -Supergirl -Loir Lemaris -Aquagirl -Green Arrow -Huntress (Earth-2) -Robin (Earth-2) -Hawkman (Earth-2) -Rising Son -Wonder Woman (Earth-1)*

END NOTES: - In the interest of brevity, I’ve forgone mentioning which specific heroes go where, who fights who, and so on and so forth. If you’re really curious as to what, for instance, Halo’s up to during the Shadow Demon attack in issue #12, I recommend just reading the comic. It will probably be quicker. - I’ve done my best to specifically name the ‘main’ characters; characters that play a significant role within the story, or characters that have an ‘arc’. - Also in the interest of brevity! I’ve tried to simplify various concepts where possible; for instance, I refer to the Anti-Monitor’s base of operations ‘his ship’ when in actuality, it is three separate locations within the anti-matter universe; a fortress, a ship, and the planet Qward. (Qward is the anti-matter universe equivalent of Oa, which the Anti-Monitor conquered shortly after his creation.) As the specific location within the anti-matter universe is not terribly significant to the main plot, a generic term was used. - Like any comic crossover worth its salt, Crisis had lead-ups and tie-ins. There are characters and plots introduced in Crisis that show up briefly, and then are never mentioned again, presumably to be picked up or referenced in other titles. As this post is primarily concerned with the main crossover event, they’ve not been included. - The cosmic origins of various characters, universes, and anti-universes are perhaps only slightly less confusing and vague as the summaries in this post. - Lastly: I’d treat this a bit like a translation--it’s one person’s view of the important bits of a written work, and as such, the source is always going to be the best place to look if you want to accurately judge the plot, characters, etc. If you have the time and the means, I recommend checking it out. (If only for those INSANE George Perez group shots...my god, so many characters on any given page.)

#long post #DC comics #crisis on infinite earths #COIE #did I plan this so that it perfectly coincided with the release of the trailer today?#...absolutely not that's just a nice coincidence XD

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melodyalanaroster · 6 years ago

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Aquaman Date

“Nathaniel? Are you free tomorrow night?”

“I’ve got nothing planned. Do you have something in mind?”

“Do you wanna go to a movie with me?”

“What movie?”

“Aquaman.”

“I thought you only saw superhero movies with Noelle, Lucy, Stanley and your team.”

“When was the last time you went to a movie?”

“Touche.”

“This one looks really good. The DCEU has been a bit of a disaster lately…. With the only really decent thing to come out of it being Wonder Woman… I’m hoping this can join Wonder Woman in salvaging it… I love Marvel, but I also like DC. That, and I follow the Prop Master on social media, so I know they use both practical effects and CGI in it.”

“Are you sure you don’t wanna go with anyone else? Nobody thinks “Superhero Movie” and thinks of me.”

“That, my dear, is precisely why I wanna take you. You need more fun in your life, and comic book movies are really fun.”

“Alright, I’m in. It’s a date.”

“See you tomorrow night. ;)”

Nathaniel chuckled as he looked at the messages. Amber was standing next to him, looking at him, curiously. “What?” she asked. “I’ve got a date tomorrow night.” His eyes had gone soft. Amber instantly realized that he had been talking to Alana. “Don’t screw it up!” she joked.

Alana had begun walking towards the cafe to meet up with Chani and Priya during the conversation with Nathaniel. Her face lit up, and there was the beginnings of a spring to her step. “You’re cheery.” Chani beamed as Alana sat down at the table. “What’s up Alana?” Priya asked. “I’ve got a date tomorrow night. Nathaniel and I are gonna go see Aquaman.” Priya looked at Alana cautiously. “Please be careful with Nathaniel. I know you can take care of yourself, but he is one of your weaknesses.” she warned.

The following day sped by. Alana didn’t have much to do all day, so she re-watched Wonder Woman and Justice League to refresh her memory. “Maybe I should have Nath watch these to get him up to speed.” she thought. “Although, this is a stand alone movie… We can always watch them afterward.” she thought as she went onto her terrace. It was a nice, brisk day and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. Suddenly, she heard a knock on her door. “Hey Nath!” she beamed as she opened the door. Nathaniel smiled. “Hey, are you ready?” She motioned for him to look at her. “Of course I’m ready!” she chuckled as they walked out of the apartment and headed towards the theater.

“It’s a good thing I already bought the tickets. Or else we wouldn’t have gotten such great seats!” Alana commented as they sat down. “Wow, there’s a lot of people here!” Nathaniel replied. “Yeah, I don’t know if you’ve realized this, but we’re in the middle of a MASSIVE comic book movie boom. Superheroes are all the rage these days.” She explained. “I knew there were a lot of them coming out lately, I had no idea it was like this.” he responded. “Age of the geek, baby.” she beamed as the movie began.

Throughout the movie, Nathaniel couldn’t help but look at Alana, whose eyes were fixated on the screen in a look of wonder. “She’s so cute.” he thought as he lifted the armrest between them and attempted to put his arm around her. She relaxed into him instantly. When his eyes had returned to the screen, she glanced at him, smiled, and took his hand in hers. “He’s perfect.” she thought.

When the movie ended, Nathaniel attempted to stand, but Alana caught him before he could. “Always wait for the credits to end when it comes to superhero movies.” she whispered as the end credits song began to play.

“Everything I Need” by Skylar Grey

“Born on the wrong side of the ocean

With all the tides against you You never thought you’d be much good for anyone But that’s so far from the truth I know there’s pain in your heart And you’re covered in scars Wish you could see what I do ‘Cause baby, everything you are Is everything I need You’re everything to me Baby, every single part Is who you’re meant to be 'Cause you were meant for me And you’re everything I need You can say I’m wrong You can turn your back against me But I’m here to stay (I’m here to stay) Like the sea She keeps kissing his shoreline No matter how many times he pushes her away 'Cause baby, everything you are Is everything I need You’re everything to me Baby, every single part Is who you’re meant to be 'Cause you were meant for me And everything happens for a reason It’s all a blessing in disguise I used to question who I was When now I see The answer’s in your eyes 'Cause baby, everything you are Is everything I need You’re everything to me Baby, every single part Is who you’re meant to be 'Cause you were meant for me And you’re everything I need”

The song caught both Alana and Nathaniel off guard. The lyrics resonated with them so well that they couldn’t help but look at each other as the song played. Nathaniel ran his thumb over Alana’s, and they both began to blush. When the credits ended, they left the theater and began discussing the movie. “That was actually pretty good! I wasn’t expecting that!” Nathaniel beamed. “Yeah! I’m impressed! DC did really well! But, then again, if they had done this in the first place, they wouldn’t be struggling to keep up with Marvel! Marvel took ten years to get to Infinity War, and before they went and made the first Avengers movie, they established the universe with solo movies like Iron Man, Captain America and Thor. Man of Steel didn’t do so well because DC has done nothing but crank out Batman and Superman movies for years… And not all of them have been gems. When Batman Vs. Superman came out, Marvel was bringing out Captain America: Civil War. DC literally pitted their heroes against each other without properly establishing their film universe just because Marvel was pitting their heroes against each other to build up to Infinity War. While I do commend DC for trying to not be Marvel, they were idiots for not following Marvel’s formula… And that formula is what made the MCU so successful. Sure, Sony still has most of the Spider-Man properties, and Fox only recently sold their Marvel properties to Disney, but there are plans. DC’s plans are scattered and they’re relying on Patty Jenkins, Gal Gadot, James Wan and Jason Momoa to save their asses.” Alana babbled. “Alana, I had no idea you were so encyclopedic on the topic.” Nathaniel laughed. “We watch a lot of movies around the R.D.R, and my family is a bunch of geeks… Not to mention, I love the topic. It’s fascinating to see the two biggest comic book companies go head to head and how they compete.” she laughed. They had managed to walk to the park during the conversation. “We should definitely do this more often. I love watching movies with you.” Nathaniel suggested. Alana blushed. “Definitely. You know I have quite the collection, and I know you haven’t seen a decent chunk of them.” Nathaniel smiled. “How about weekly? I come by your place and we watch a movie.” Alana’s eyes lit up. “That is a wonderful idea! I’ll even cook us dinner!”

When they made it back to the Black Tower, Derek was passing through the foyer. “How was the movie, guys?” he asked. “It was cool.” Nathaniel smiled. “Absolutely phenomenal! Worth the merit it’s getting!” Alana beamed. “Awesome!” Derek smiled as he walked off. During the elevator ride towards the top of the tower, Nathaniel held Alana’s hand. They weren’t ready to say it yet, but they knew they love each other. The song still rang through Alana’s mind, each and every lyric replaying perfectly. “Leave it to a superhero movie to have a song that perfectly describes my love for him.” she thought as she looked at him and leaned her head on his shoulder. Nathaniel looked down at her. “I used to question who I was, but now I see, the answer’s in your eyes.” he began to think. “That makes a lot of sense…” he continued to think.

When the elevator got to Alana’s floor, Nathaniel walked her to her door. “This was a lot of fun Alana.” he blushed. “Yeah, it was. I can’t wait for next time.” she blushed. He looked into her eyes, the desire to kiss her filling him up. “DO IT! She loves you!” the little voice in the back of his head told him. “Not yet, it’s not the right time.” His consciousness replied to the voice. Her eyes had grown big with nervousness, their blue turning them into deep oceans that he wanted to dive right into. “Alana… I…” he began. “I know… I want to too… But, I can almost guarantee that we’re being watched… So how about we let it happen when it’s a little more private…” she stood on her tip toes and kissed his cheek lovingly while caressing the other cheek with her fingers. He looked at her adoringly and placed kisses on her cheek and forehead. “Goodnight and sweet dreams, my Melody.” he cooed. “Goodnight and sweet dreams, my love. I’ll be dreaming of you.” she purred as he began walking away.

When she entered her apartment, her legs had begun to feel like they were turning into jelly. She quickly made her way to her bedroom, took her glasses off, and fell on her bed. The loudest, most happy, sigh escaping from her body as it collided with her comforter. “I love him so much!” she sighed.

Nathaniel looked on social media as he walked to his apartment and something curious came to his attention. Apparently a random girl had taken a picture of him and Alana as they walked through the park after the movie. It was a good picture, that caught them holding hands and smiling. “I should thank that girl for the picture.” he chuckled as he saved the picture as the wallpaper to his phone. When he got to his room, he took off his jacket and shirt, then looked out his window, towards the Black Tower. “I love you Alana.”

———————————————————————————————————–

03/09/19:

Yes, I’m aware that Aquaman is weeks away from being on DVD/Blu Ray… But, I’ve been planning this blurb for a couple of months…. I’ve just been really busy and, at one point, had writer’s block… I’ve actually gone to write it multiple times… But this is the only time I’ve realized precisely what I’ve wanted this blurb to say… I guess I had written so much Alana x Nathaniel at the time that I needed to write a couple of blurbs where Alana interacts with other people… Because I managed to do 2 with her and Castiel and 1 with her and Rayan…

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wbwest · 7 years ago

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New Post has been published on WilliamBruceWest.com

New Post has been published on http://www.williambrucewest.com/2017/08/25/west-week-ever-pop-culture-review-82517/

West Week Ever: Pop Culture In Review - 8/25/17

In movie news, there was quite the controversial casting this week, as the color lines blurred for some comic book adaptations. First up, it was announced that English actor Ed Skrein would be portraying Japanese character Ben Daimio in the upcoming Hellboy reboot. Now, according to what I’ve read, Daimio’s Japanese heritage heavily influences the character, so this whitewashing of the character doesn’t seem to be in the best interest of the character. I mean, after the problems with whitewashing in Doctor Strange, Ghost in the Shell, Aloha, The Great Wall, and Ni’ihau, you’d think Hollywood would avoid shit like this. Yes, movies are made to make money, but it’s not like Skrein is a bankable star worth slotting into the role, so it doesn’t make a lot of sense. Usually this is done for the film’s STARS. Damon, Johansson, Stone. This is a secondary character, so it really wouldn’t have hurt them to seek out an Asian actor. Normally I’m just like “Well, Hollywood’s gonna Hollywood”, but this decision just doesn’t make a ton of sense.

Next up, 24: Legacy’s Anna Diop has been cast as Starfire in Warner Bros’ Titans series, slated to air on DC’s upcoming digital service. Some folks are saying they should’ve cast a Latina, but she’s gonna either be painted or CGied in orange, so it’s not like it’s gonna matter at the end of the day. Personally, if they wanted authenticity, I think they should’ve cast an actual orange alien princess. Right now there are just too many unknowns for me to get excited about this. I mean, DC announced the digital service without a lot of information. What’s gonna be on it? What will it cost? How much of the DC library will be available to be housed on it? As for Titans, this is the show TNT passed on. Ya know, the home of such illustrious shows as The Librarians and The Last Ship. I mean, they’re basically just about a notch up from what we got in the 90s from Universal’s Action Pack lineup. If Titans couldn’t fit anywhere on that schedule, then it probably just isn’t “ready for primetime” yet.

Speaking of aimless Warner Bros decisions, they announced 2 different Joker movies this week. First up is an origin tale, directed by Todd Phillips of Old School fame, and produced by Martin Scorsese. Hmm, one of those things is not like the other. I mean, why would Scorsese touch something helmed by the dude who gave us Road Trip? And who even WANTS a Joker origin story? First of all, it’s reportedly not even going to be part of the DCEU, so why confuse the audience with a story that won’t even really “count” in the grand scheme of things? Nobody needs a standalone origin of a take on a character they’ll likely never see again. This is just as foolish as Sony’s Don’t-Look-For-Spider-Man-To-Appear Venom movie. Next, the guys behind This Is Us (SO hot right now!) and Crazy, Stupid, Love are working on a Bonnie & Clyde-style Joker and Harley film, with Jared Leto and Margot Robbie reprising their roles from Suicide Squad. Since this would sort of negate the empowerment that Harley gained by the end of Squad, it’s believed that this actually means that the planned Gotham City Sirens film, also slated to star Robbie, is now dead. Honestly, I could do without either of these movies. I found Leto’s take on Joker to be…interesting, but Less is More with that character. Plus, I don’t really think the DCEU would be strengthened by this sort of movie. It’s not the world-building they need to be doing right now, as they haven’t even figured out the core of their star characters like Batman and Superman yet.

In TV news, Christopher Sebela’s comic Heartthrob has been optioned as a TV series by Felix Culpa – a production company launched by actress/Elvis’s granddaughter Riley Keough. Now, comics are optioned every day, and the final product never comes to fruition, but I hope this series sees the light of day. I’m actually a big fan of the comic, which is published by Oni Press. Set in the late 70s, it focuses on Callie, who’s received a heart transplant while the process is still in its infancy. Given a new lease on life, but still told she’s basically living on borrowed time, she decides to change her life when she meets Mercer, a charming guy with a shady side. She immediately falls for him, and he teaches her how to be bad, like rob banks and commit other crimes. She gets off on the rush. Pretty soon, however, she realizes that Mercer isn’t real. No, he’s actually the ghost of the guy whose heart is now in Callie. So, it’s a Bonnie & Clyde story where Clyde’s calling the shots from the afterlife. The book is published in “seasons”, so the first 5-issue miniseries wrapped up back in early 2016, while season 2 is hitting stores now. If you’re looking for a new comic not from the Big Two, I highly recommend it.

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In music news, Taylor Swift did a whole social blitz to announce that her next album would be called Reputation, and would be released Nov 10th. On top of that, the first single was released last night, with rumors that the video will premiere at Sunday’s MTV Video Music Awards. Ya know, the same awards hosted my Taylor’s enemy Katy Perry. Yeah, that should be pretty interesting to watch. Anyway, the new song is called “Look What You Made Me Do”, and I’m not too impressed. It lacks a real hook, while the chorus itself is basically spoken. I feel like it has all the ingredients for a great song, but it’s not living up to its full potential. If this is an indicator of what to expect on Reputation, though, I’ll admit I’m curious. It can’t be worse than Perry’s Witness.

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Speaking of Katy Perry, we got the premiere of her video for “Swish Swish”, which was reportedly her diss track against Taylor Swift. After a lot of backtracking and sucking up, though, it seems Katy wants to put that feud behind her. That’s why this horrible video does everything it can to take the bite out of a song that was never really that biting to begin with. I mean, just look at it – Molly Shannon? Terry Crews? Even Nicki Minaj was clearly CGied in, as I’m sure she didn’t wanna be anywhere near this shitshow. The sad thing about the Perry/Swift feud is that Katy bailed on it the minute she realized the Swifties were a more powerful lobby than she had thought. Nobody was feeling her SNL performances, and Witness didn’t exactly fly off the shelves. She realized that she can’t really survive by making enemies, so suddenly she became conciliatory to save her ass. Plus, it’s kinda lame that this blood feud started just because Taylor stole a few of Katy’s dancers for her tour. Anyway, you’ll never get those 6 minutes back. You’re welcome.

I had the pleasure of joining my buddy Zac for his new podcast, The Zac Shipley Show. He’s treating these first few episodes as pilots for ideas he’s wanted to try, so our ep was called Streaming Pile, where we talked about the worst things we could find on streaming services. I talked about a Star Trek: Voyager episode where formerly perky pixie Kes returns all middle-aged and bitter. You should check it out, and give a listen to his other episodes while you’re there!

Song of the Week

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I’ve been a big Maren Morris fan since she released “My Church”, and I was really into her next single, “80s Mercedes”. With this song she continues not to disappoint, as I love the groove on this thing. Listen to the bassline. It’s not a dance song, yet you can do a MEAN two-step to it. Hell, I think you could even do a casual version of The Hustle to it. This will definitely go to #1 given time.

Things You Might Have Missed This Week

NBC’s planned reboot of Xena: Warrior Princess – which would’ve featured a full-on lesbian relationship between her and Gabrielle – is officially dead, as they said “it didn’t warrant a reboot”. Man, if only other studios would realize this about some of their projects…

Director James Gunn mentioned in a Q & A session that the 3rd Guardians of the Galaxy film would set up the next 10-20 years of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Yup, you’re just now realizing your own mortality. I’ll give you a minute to deal with that.

Speaking of Gunn, he’s attached to write the pilot for (and possibly direct) a reboot of 70s series Starsky & Hutch. This adaptation is supposed to be similar in tone to CBS’s upcoming S.W.A.T. and not comedic in tone like the 2004 Ben Stiller & Owen Wilson movie.

Surprising every critic in Hollywood, Netflix has renewed the maligned comedy Friends From College for a second season.

Known for controversial publicity stunts, Alamo Drafthouse is reportedly organizing a Clowns Only screening of the new adaptation of Stephen King’s It.

We got a new poster for Thor: Ragnarok. So many colors!

Michael K. Williams has reportedly been cut from the Star Wars Han Solo film, as Ron Howard’s reshoot schedule conflicted with another role that Williams had accepted.

There are, like, 8 different Knight Rider reboot treatments floating around Hollywood, but the latest rumor is that one of those productions is looking at John Cena as Michael Knight, with Kevin Hart as the voice of K.I.T.T. Of course, it would be a comedic adaptation, a la the popular Jump Street franchise.

Super Troopers 2, the sequel to one of the most overrated films I’ve ever seen, will hit theaters April 20th, 2018.

Anne Hathaway and Rebel Wilson will star in Nasty Women, which is a female-led reboot of the Michael Caine/Steve Martin classic Dirty Rotten Scoundrels.

Independence Day: Resurgence‘s Jessie T Usher will star in Son of Shaft, with Samuel L. Jackson potentially reprising his role as John Shaft (from the 2000 reboot film), the nephew of the original John Shaft, played by Richard Roundtree, who is also in talks to join the movie. Man, that gave me a headache.

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Always on the cutting edge, here’s Sesame Street’s parody of 2017’s song of the summer, “Despacito”

According to the creators, the Netflix series Stranger Things will most likely end after its fourth season

The actress formerly known as “Andrea Zuckerman”, Gabrielle Carteris, has been re-elected to a 2-year term as the President of the Screen Actors Guild-American Federation of Television and Radio Artists (SAG-AFTRA)

Ryan Gosling will host the season premiere of Saturday Night Live, with musical guest Jay-Z, on Sept 30th.

Jamie Bell is developing a Jumper TV series, based on the 2008 film about teleporters

Suicide Squad 2 is reportedly being fast tracked, but I hope they fast track it right into the garbage. I mean, I enjoyed the first one, but I don’t need a sequel.

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I like Nick Kroll, even though I never saw even a second of Kroll Show. Anyway, he’s got a new animated series about puberty called Big Mouth coming to Netflix and after watching this teaser I am ON BOARD!

We’re a month away from the premiere of Star Trek: Discovery, and it was revealed that it will be rated TV-MA, for Mature Audiences. Now, it doesn’t mean there’ll be tits and phasers, but it does mean they can tell more complex stories. That said, I still feel like they don’t truly understand the source material.

After a scathing essay from his ex-wife went public, accusing him of adultery and other generally shitty behavior to women, Joss Whedon went underground and the fan site, Whedonesque, shut down after 15 years.

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We got a new teaser for Netflix’s The Punisher. With the rate I’m getting through these Marvel shows, I’ll probably get to it just before Evie goes off to Hogwarts.

There was a national solar eclipse this week, which was the first occurrence since 1918. I’m sure you might’ve heard something about it. It was kind of a big deal. Folks were pimping out special cardboard glasses on Craigslist for insane amounts of money, and the American President made news by looking directly into it. It seems that it had a strange effect on different folks. For example, Netflix viewership went down 10% as people went outside to view the phenomenon. Not everyone understood what was going on, bless their hearts. At work, a frantic parent called in and said “Y’all watching the news? You hear about this eclipse? Is it serious?!” Apparently she thought it posed some sort of danger to her kids and the school. No, ma’am. It’s just a beautiful sky ballet. Anyway, the eclipse was EVERYWHERE. I didn’t get to see totality, but it was still nice to stand outside for a bit on a nice day. What am I saying? I hate the outdoors! Well, it was nice to not have to work for a few minutes. You couldn’t escape the Eclipse Fever at the start of the week, so that’s why the Solar Eclipse of 2017 had the West Week Ever.

#80s #Batman #Comics #Country #DC #Indie #Knight Rider #Marvel #Movies #Music #Politics #Pop #Race #Star Trek #Star Wars #Television #West Week Ever #Wrestling

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great-kung-lao · 8 years ago

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I'm personally not a huge superman fan, but I really wanna give him a chance. What would you recommend for me to watch and/or read to give me the best experience?

First of all: thank you for this question. Second of all: thank you for deciding to try and get into Superman mythology.

I will try to do my best and give some proper advices.

1. What to read? Well, I guess it will be too long of a road if you try to get into main continuity, but there are some great self contained elseworld stories. “Elseworld” means that it happens in an alternative universe from the main continuity and you don’t need to read many years of comic books that were released before to understand those stories.

All-Star Superman. I would say that this book is almost a bible of Superman. This story contains pretty much everything that the character is loved for. It has amazing visual style and great narrative by Grant Morrison. Definitely number one to start with.

Superman: Secret Origin. This book might be called as a definitive version of Superman’s origin story that is told from Clark’s own perspective. It starts from his earliest years and leads to him discovering his full potential and true purpose on Earth.

Superman: Secret Identity. This is just really enjoyable book, that tells ridiculously fun story. It’s kind of real world mixed with fiction. In Secret Identity DC Comics exist exactly like for us: it is comic books with lots of things based on it from movies to toys. The main character is a simple boy who happens to have same name as the fictional character - Clark Kent. But one day he wakes up with Superman’s abilities…

Superman: American Alien. Another origin story about famous super hero, but is told with a different tone and style that the character and his fans haven’t seen before. Also a self contained elseworld story that should be considered to read.

But if you feel like you want to follow the character with the rest of the world in his main continuity, you might start with Superman: Convergence that has only 2 issues and tells about the survival of Superman of New Earth (the main canon version currently that started in 1986) after Flashpoint. Then it follows with a mini series called Superman: Lois and Clark that tells about Superman’s family life on Prime Earth (current canon Earth in DC universe, since their own universe that they originated from is no more after Flashpoint event). Then you can start DC Rebirth, the latest kind-of-reboot, where Superman of New Earth (also known as Pre-Flashpoint Superman) comes out of hiding and becomes a world known super hero again (since the New 52 version is dead, but you should not care about him, it was a mistake just like the entire New 52 reboot). While starting DC Rebirth, you need to read DC Rebirth #1 first and only then start DC Rebirth: Superman #1 and on to current ongoing issues. Superman is also a main character in Action Comics (which is also the second main ongoing series about the character after Superman: Rebirth), Justice League: Rebirth and Trinity comic books that are also part of DC Rebirth. He also makes some brief appearances in comic books of other characters such as Nightwing, Aquaman and Deathstroke as of the latest.

2. What to watch? Well, it depends on how much time you are ready to put into.

Smallville. The TV show that started it all - super heroes becoming famous on television. It consists of 10 season, each with +20 episodes and each episode is +40 minutes long. So it depends on you if you are ready to put that much of a time into a television show. But Tom Welling and Erica Durance are one of the greatest Clark and Lois portrayals in history of the characters and the show itself is simply legendary.

Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman. The show is really old and looks kind of silly by today’s standards. The main focus is the relationship between Lois and Clark, so if you are into long-time love stories, you might enjoy this show and it’s simply amazing to see Dean Cane and Teri Hatcher’s versions of the characters.

Superman Returns. This doesn’t have the greatest positive popularity, but I think you should give it a chance that it really deserves. This is definitely not the worst movie of all time, it has its ups and downs, but it all comes to your personal opinion that you will get only after watching the movie by yourself.

Man of Steel. The latest version of Superman’s origin story on the big screen. People might whine all they want about this movie, but I LOVE IT VERY MUCH, it did so much for me and Henry Cavill is definitely one of the best versions of Superman to date. He dedicated himself fully to literally become Superman, especially physically, just by looking at him in that costume you might actually believe that the character is real. And just like in case with the Superman Returns - it all comes to your own experience with the movie. Don’t let other people poison your opinion, you should form your own by watching Man of Steel.

It won’t be bad if you give a try to Superman movie of 1978, but it might be difficult to watch if your eyes got used to modern quality of pictures. Though the movie is considered to be classic and definitely is worth to watch. In my opinion this movie is immortal and Christopher Reeve’s version of Superman is a legend.

There is an animated movie based on All-Star Superman story, but I would suggest to read the visual novel first and then watch the cartoon version.

Superman: Unbound. All I need to say about this - the best latest animated movie about Superman. You better ignore all those based on New 52 atrocities that are presented in other latest DC animated movies like Justice League of 2014. Seriously, New 52 is so bad that you should not even know about its existence.

You might also want to give a try to such cartoon TV shows as Superman: The Animated Series, Justice League and Justice League Unlimited.

That would be just it from me. Hopefully this list will be helpful to you in one way or another and to other people who want to jump on the Kryptonian adventure.

#Superman #Clark Kent #Kal-El #Clois #Henry Cavill #Tom Welling #Dean Cane #Brandon Routh #Christopher Reeve #Justice League #Smallville

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totesmccoats · 7 years ago

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Dark Nights: Metal #3

The heroes have lost. Barbatos has risen, and he and his dark knights have dominated the Earth, plugging people into giant towers that will power the planet’s descent into the Dark Multiverse.

Meanwhile, Superman has been dreaming – dreaming that he’s fought Barbatos dozens of times, and died dozens of times. But in one of those dreams, he won; and even though that one too ends with Barbatos’ ultimate victory, Clark hears Bruce – the real Bruce – calling out to him from the darkness.

Woken from his dreams by Wonder Woman, Superman tries and fails yet again to take the fight to Barbatos, but is rescued by Dr. Fate, who has gathered the Earth’s remaining heroes in a secret location to hide from the Dark Knights and plan their perpetually less likely resistance. But their chances are bolstered when Green Arrow reveals that the Knights have a weakness – Nth metal – and while most of it has been destroyed, Fate and the Plastic Man egg (I’m still not really sure either, tbh) reveal four locations where more might exist. Green Lantern and Mr. Terrific take the Plastic Man Egg to coordinates in an empty part of space; Aquaman and Deathstroke search in a secret and sacred location under Atlantis; and Wonder Woman, Dr. Fate, and Kendra Saunders seek the Rock of Eternity.

Meanwhile, Superman, the Flash, and Steel venture to the fourth location, into the Dark Multiverse itself, where Superman believes he might find Batman.

I wanna tell you guys a few things that are in this book to convince you that Metal is the most insane, balls to the wall comic ever published by DC:

Batman sends a message to Superman encoded in the ‘66 Batman theme song.

Superman races to fight Barbatos in Gotham only to find Barbatos, many stories high, on top of a mountain lined with the soul-drained bodies of Gotham’s citizens, and flanked by dragons with the Joker’s face. That’s just a deathmetal album cover right there. That’s straight up bonkers. Capullo and Glapion make almost every page an album cover, aside from the aforementioned Batbatos scene, we also get the Dark Knights on horses while the world burns behind them, like something out of Revelations.

Superman says, and I quote, “If we open a portal with the Phantom Zone Projector while we super-charge the antenna with the Speed Force, Steel’s connection to the Nth metal might create an energy link to the Dark Multiverse, and Batman himself.” That’s the single most comic book thing I have ever read.

Snyder’s writing has some of the same issues it’s always had. This issue has some awkwardly placed narrative and thematic exposition delivered by the Batman Who Laughs while Superman gets curbstomped by Devastor Batman – but that is a small nitpick considering just how much this book straight-up rocks.

Mister Miracle #3

While on leave from the war between New Genesis and Apocalypse, Scott gets a visit from the Forager, who tells him of the millions of Bugs sacrificed by Orion on the front lines of the war, and how many more will die during Orion’s planned invasion of Apocalypse. Forager also tells Scott that the Bugs admire and respect him over his brother, and that they will follow his, not Orion’s command. But as soon as he makes his vow, Forager is killed by Lightray for treason. Scott is relatively nonplussed, and heads back to bed, needing the rest before an escape show the next day.

After his show, and a quick lunch with Barda, Scott is summoned back to New Genesis for a meeting with Orion, to whom he admits he thinks he may be infected by the Anti-Life equation, and whom punishes Scott for questioning his authority.

King begins the issue with an jaw-droppingly dark parable that Scott tells Barda Granny Goodness would tell as a bedtime story. It involves a kid during the Nazi occupation of the Netherlands who accidently reveals that his family has been hiding Jews in their basement. It doesn’t have a happy ending. But it really does set the tone for the issue. War isn’t hell, war is worse. Hell punishes people for their wrongdoing, war forces them into situations where there’s no option but to do wrong. This is reinforced when Scott watches Lightway murder Forager right in front of him, doing nothing to prevent it, and too numb afterwards to do anything but crawl back into bed.

King once again leans on the 3-by-3 grid to keep the comic’s pace, but damn if it doesn’t work. This issue is neatly split into four parts, which are as easily distinguishable by color palette as verbal content. Gerad separates the issue into four distinct tones: red, grey, blue, and yellow to tell each chapter.

The Nazi parable is in red, highlighting the menace and cruelty of war while depicting Orion beheading the corpse of Granny Goodness.

The meeting between Scott and Forager is the grey of Scott’s apartment at midnight, broken by the almost garish red of Forager’s costume, and eventually by Lightray. I also loved Scott spooning the much larger Barda when he climbs back into bed, almost evoking the famous portrait of John and Yoko.

Scott’s stunt, and the lunch afterwards are framed by LA’s bright blue sky and the wall of the restaurant. The pacing in this chapter is maybe the most remarkable part considering how seemingly insignificant it is to the story. It takes Scott two pages to climb up the crane holding the box he’ll escape from, and another page for the box to fall to the ground.

And the last chapter, taking place in Orion’s chamber is framed mostly in yellow, but falls into a digitally artifacted mess by the end, as Orion beats the snot out of Scott.

Ragman #1

Rory Regan hasn’t been the same since coming home from the war. He’s been anxious, paranoid, believing himself to be watched by monsters. Besides PTSD, it’s survivor’s guilt. He was the only man of his squad to return home after a tomb raiding expedition went south. But he didn’t come home alone.

One night Rory wakes up covered in rags, the rags he found in that tomb, and hanging off the side of a building in Gotham. The rags speak to him in the voices of his fallen friends, and tell him to hunt and absorb a monster for strength. It won’t be the first monster.

I’ve honestly never been too familiar with Ragman, though I know the basics of his character. Always the sole survivor of some sort of accident, has a costume made of rags which absorbs the souls of the evil and can act independently. This new version keeps all that, as well as the connection to Jewish mysticism – the rags are found in Israel – and adds a bit of Moon Knight to the mix.

Unfortunately, unlike Moon Knight, the existence of the rags takes away from the question of Regan’s mental state rather than muddle them as with Marc Spector’s. The book isn’t ambiguous about the rags and what is real, and with that problem solved, Rory doesn’t demonstrate any weird mental hangups. Well, it’s only issue one.

I do kinda love what Miranda does with Rahman, particularly in with his movement. It’s very reminiscent of Spider-Man, with his waking up stuck to a building in an unfamiliar costume leaning heavily into symbiote territory. But it’s an effective style that communicates how Rory is being pulled through the city by the suit instead of his own will. The suit is tossing him around. This new costume, and the movement, is also really creepy looking, bending Rory into almost inhuman acrobatic poses.

The Flash #32

Kid Flash is helping train Flash to use his new powers, but things are still difficult between Wally and Barry. After stopping a robbery and leaving Black Spider to be picked up by the cops, Barry goes to his first day at work at Iron Heights Penitentiary with Kristen.

They’re given the tour by Warden Wolfe, a no-nonsense and ruthless keeper of his prisoners. When a fight breaks out, Wolfe lets the two prisoners – Heatwave and Godspeed – beat themselves tired before sending in his mecha-suited guards, the Pipeline, to finish the job. Wolfe doesn’t believe there can be redemption for anyone who ends up in Iron Heights, so chooses to punish them for their bad deeds. Kristin is appalled, but Barry is surprisingly ok with it – better the bad-guys get hurt than countless innocents.

Meanwhile, a war between Central City crime families is beginning to break out, and Copperhead doesn’t even know the name of her enemy.

For all intents and purposes, Flash is back to it’s mostly sunny disposition; marked as much by Duce’s clean linework and Plascencia’s bold saturated colors as Williamson giving Barry and Wally jokes to crack while foiling a robbery.

I really hope this story continues to have things to say about inhumane treatment of prisoners. Places like Iron Heights and Arkham Asylum have always been big parts of the superhero mythos, and there’s a lot the genre could say regarding prisoner rights and rehabilitative vs. punishing incarceration. Am I expecting an ACLU-level treatise? Of course not, but any amount of advocacy means something, especially from a genre of book all about crime and justice.

Wonder Woman #32

ARGUS confirms that the energy that killed Hercules is Apocolypse-ian, and from that Wonder Woman is able to piece together that Grail is behind the murder of Hercules and dozens of other Gods that ARGUS has found. Wonder Woman leads Steve Trevor and his Oddfellows into the Paris Catacombs to pick up on Grail’s trail, only to find a nest of Parademons which she quickly dispatches, only to find no clues. This leaves one last thread to follow, Blake Hooper, the executor of Hercules’ estate.

After coming off a bit soured by the Robinson’s first issue, he does a lot in this one to assuage those worries. The issue begins with Wonder Woman kicking all sorts of Parademon ass, and having Trevor and the Oddfellows comment on how they don’t even really need to be there. The issue still eventually focuses on another dude rather than Wonder Woman herself – and Diana is still the only named woman in the issue – but at least this issue focuses enough on Diana to show the force of nature she can be.

There’s no denying the influence the recent movie has had on the way Davila renders Diana on the page, and he draws her way closer to the warrior she is than just a pretty face. As she cuts through the Parademons, you focus way more on her strength – the force with which she slams into them with her shield or flings them into each-other using her lasso – than how pretty she is while doing it. And Fajardo’s bright reds and blues really make Diana pop from the yellow-brown background of the catacombs and Parademons.

Things get less interesting, plotwise and visually, after the catacombs, when Diana is put into a brown trench-coat to speak with Blake Hooper about Hercules’ Will, but brighten up at the end when she sheds it to fly out onto the Mediterranean to find her lost twin brother.

Amazing Spider-Man #789

Following the Clone Conspiracy incident, the revolution in Sokovia, and the attempted takeover by Hydra, Parker Industries has collapsed, leaving Peter destitute and crashing on Mockingbird’s couch. Having also betrayed SHIELD in Sokovia, she’s found a new apartment and job, but Peter hadn’t found the energy. Every time he turns on the TV or picks up the paper, all he sees is people calling him a failure for running his company into the ground and costing thousands their jobs and millions of dollars in lost stock value. Ashamed, he’s been avoiding his friends and Aunt May, too.

He does, however, finally leave Bobbi’s couch to go over to the Bugle to call out Joe Robertson – a trusted friend – for a piece he wrote about Parker Industries, only for Joe to put Pete in his place about being over his head in running a multinational company, which ain’t false. Going back to Bobbi’s even less confident in himself, Bobbi drags Peter out on patrol with her to get him back in the swing of things. And while they do find a baddie to beat on, they also find that the public turned on Spider-Man, who they still believe to be working for Parker Industries. Back to square one.

Rule one: Nothing in comics ever really changes. After playing Tony Stark for a bit, Peter Parker is back to being poor and jobless, and Spider-Man is back to reaching for any bit of social approval he can find. If anything, it’s at least impressive how Slott can make it feel different while effectively running Peter in place. The collapse of PI may but have been his fault, but it is his responsibility; and he’s responding to it with the classic Parker self-destructiveness, mostly through avoidance. But, as corollary to the Parker luck, he always inexplicably has an attractive woman nearby who really wants to help. In this case, Mockingbird, who realizes that what Peter really needs is to forget Parker’s problems by going out as Spider-Man for a night. This, by the way, is also a really sly way to bring back the classic Peter or Spidey conflict: the idea that only one of them can be happy at any given time.

Immonen continues his amazing work on the series, and how he dresses Pete in this issue is on point, with the baggy sweats that scream “I’ve given up.” And bringing back the “Ask me about my feminist agenda” shirt? *mwah*

Ms. Marvel #23

Kamala hasn’t acted as Ms. Marvel since her encounter with Josh, having a crisis in confidence in her own ability to judge other people or otherwise act in a way to benefit others instead of cause more harm. But a runaway train is exactly the sort of disaster that overwhelms her fear with a sense of responsibility. And even though the train is only running at a leisurely 25mph, she still has no way to stop it; but luckily, she’ll have some help from the Laal Khanjeer, the hero she met in Pakistan, who recently came to Jersey to study abroad.

This may be the lowest-energy we’ve ever seen Kamala, who can barely muster a smile through the entire issue, much less her usual level of witty banter. Laal Khanjeer picks up a lot of that slack, energetically leaping into action, and making sardonic remarks about the low quality of America’s rail infrastructure as he get his first-hand tour from the top of a slowly moving train.

Diego Olortegui makes a brilliant debut on the series, drawing all his characters with soft detail and illustrating lots of little jokes and reactions, like Kamala completely flattening herself on the top of the train to duck under a tunnel, and giving her a real sense of bounciness as she jumps against a drawbridge in order to lower it in time. In smaller detail, the way he illustrates Kamala’s face perfectly captures her current low-energy. Besides not smiling, her eyelids are almost permanently half closed, and she looks at other characters mainly out of her periphery rather than directly at them.

Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #25

The second page of this issue has Nancy give Squirrel Girl Superman’s “world of cardboard” speech from the Justice League cartoon as a suggestion to cut loose to beat Ultron, and it is everything I didn’t know I needed from this comic.

Also, Squirrel Girls’ knuckle-spikes (which is a power she’s apparently always had. comics!) go “snukt.”

While Squirrel Girl attacks Dino-Ultron head on, Nancy and Stefan lead the other programmers on the island to program a virus to infect Ultron’s code with – and to get it done before the entire island gets destroyed by the volcano Ultron set off. Luckily, they’ll all get some help by Kraven the Hunter and his dinosaur allies.

Squirrel Girl spends almost the entirety of the issue in a pelt bikini, and it’s just so rad how buff Henderson draws her. She’s practically a Mapplethorpe model, all muscle, arms almost as thick as her waist.

The issue continues the series run as one of the most purely fun Marvel books, and is still full of the sort of programming and self-referential meta-humor as it’s ever been. For instance, Ultron wants the kidnapped programmers to update his software with X-ray vision; not so he can see through things, but so he can constantly project harmful radiation. And this book eventually has Dino-Ultron fight off an army of other Dinosaurs, so really, how can you not like it?

The Wicked + The Divine #32

This issue begins with almost the exact same three panels as last issue, only instead of being bored, Sakhmet walks in on a smoking Laura to tell her she’s killed Ammy. Same lack of reaction, too. At first. But she’s got a secret. Meanwhile, Dio wakes up and uses the last of his strength to try to stop Woden from hijacking his crowd for his own nefarious purposes. And eventually, Laura and Cass catch-up after their six months apart, and make a breakthrough.

Woden is the current champion of little shits in comics right now. What’s the first thing he does after hijacking Dio’s crowd? Brag about his thirteen asian girlfriends…because of course he does. It’s the sort of line that really makes us root for Dio as he fights his way through the crowd towards Woden, his neon pink shining against and apart from the neon-green of Woden’s mind controlled masses. The entire sequence plays like an abstract light-show.

The eventual fight between Laura, Sakhmet, and Baal is much more visceral. It begins calmly enough, with Laura and Sakhmet lying in bed together, talking about why Laura betrayed Sakhmet, and gets bloody as Sakhmet deftly weaves between Laura’s vines, clawing at Baal and attempting to gouge out Laura’s eyes. And it ends with a punch to the gut and yet another dead god.

The issue ends with Laura and Cass, who have yet another fight, but a mostly verbal one. And through it, they discover yet another secret that either Woden or Ananke’s successfully kept hidden, successfully ending the issue on a comedic beat of all things.

The next issue is the end of Imperial Phase, and we’re going into it full throttle. Between this issue and the last one, the series is certainly carrying less weight.

Redlands #3

An unlicensed bounty hunter, Laurent, goes to the station to collect on a bounty, and then back to his home in the swamp where he prepares a freshly killed deer. But he’s interrupted in the middle of the night when he hears a boat puttering through the swamp, driven by a naked man who smells of the blood of at least five different women. So, he does the responsible thing and calls the Sheriff, Bridget, to pick the nude man up.

Three issues in and I still cannot get a beat on this book. The serial killer plot from the last issue is seemingly finished in this one by a character introduced in this issue who seems like they may be important; but considering another main character may have died this issue, it’s hard to say who or what will end up mattering.

And while the issue has some enjoyable moments, like a chihuahua chomping on a man’s genitals to keep him from killing his owner; it really doesn’t hold up on it’s own without the context from the last issues, either. It is neat though that the book is unafraid to show the actual genitalia, though it does raise some flags for me regarding whether this book will indulge in sexposition.

But most perplexing is the last quarter or so of this issue, which consists of newspaper clipping following the trail of the Gator-man, a Redlands cryptid related to our new bounty hunter; and a guide to field dressing and skinning a deer which is just kinda there. The issue itself is well written, and still hauntingly illustrated enough, and I’m still curious enough to pick up the next issue, but I’d really like to be able to expect what that issue may contain.

Comic Reviews for 10/11/17 Dark Nights: Metal #3 The heroes have lost. Barbatos has risen, and he and his dark knights have dominated the Earth, plugging people into giant towers that will power the planet’s descent into the Dark Multiverse.

#batman #dc comics #marvel #metal #mister miracle #ms. marvel #ragman #redlands #spider-man #squirrel girl #the flash #the wicked + the divine #wonder woman

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britesparc · 8 years ago

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Weekend Top Ten #271

Top Ten Gritty Properties that Could Be Kids Shows

The intense fad for “grim and gritty” interpretations of popular brands and characters seems, thankfully, to have peaked. The dour tone of Batman v Superman is largely seen as one of the main reasons why it didn’t receive the critical praise or quite the same level of box-office love as Marvel movies such as Civil War or Avengers. Recent trailers for upcoming DC movies Justice League and Wonder Woman seem keen to showcase the lighter side of their characters, even if the visual style and colour palette of both films remains rooted in the murky greyness of the Snyder-verse.

All the same, it still seems that the easiest way to adapt or update a property for the modern audience is to “darken” it in some way. The Transformers films, whilst being mostly dumb action spectacle, still seem pitched at an older audience than the cartoons or comics, despite the fact that the comics are significantly more intelligent and nuanced. In the wake of Deadpool and Logan, the big rush at the moment is for sweary, bloody comics adaptations aimed at adults – as evidenced in the R-rated Hellboy reboot that’s just been announced. And I admit I’m talking a lot about comics and adaptations here; that’s probably because when I think of “grim and gritty” I think of people misunderstanding The Dark Knight Returns and making miserable Batman comics. DC have been doubling-down on the dark for at least a decade, and funnily enough they’re seeing a sales resurgence with Rebirth, which – as I understand it – proffers more open-hearted superhero tales, where Batman is allowed to crack a smile once in a while. On the other side of America, Marvel is turning its flagship boy scout superhero into a Nazi and executing their perennial optimistic sidekick, and suffering a sales slump.

Anyway, before I digress myself into a black hole, the point I’m trying to make that, for most of my adult life, the shorthand to “sophisticated and grown-up adaptation” was “make it dark, gritty, and bloody”. I think that’s because there’s always a fear that genre products are silly, or for children. My personal belief is that yes, ultimately Batman is for children. You can make a fantastic adult Batman story, of course, but at the end of the day Warners want to sell toys and pillowcases and costumes for five-year-olds. They make preschool Batman books. These characters don’t exist in a vacuum where only people with a credit card can access them. But at the same time, what’s wrong with children’s properties? Star Wars, The Hobbit, Harry Potter, Transformers, Doctor Who – they’re all children’s stories. And they’re all great.

With that in mind, let’s redress the balance by tipping the scales in the opposite direction. What adult properties are there that could be adapted for children? I know that in the 80s we saw some rather strange Saturday morning cartoons – their zenith (or nadir) being Toxic Crusaders, probably the only children’s animation based on a Troma film – but all the same, in general “grown up” franchises don’t get to become kid-friendly (yeah, I know, stuff like Terminator or Die Hard suffer that ratings slippage thing, starting out firmly R-rated but getting watered down over subsequent sequels; but I mean adapted into a proper children’s product). So here are ten properties – or films, or stories, or whatever you wanna call them – that I think could survive with their core values intact, but still become all-aged adventures. And I mean specifically all-ages; PG, not PG-13. Actual programmes or films aimed at children, rather than the bloodless and watered-down films we frequently see.

The Terminator: obviously you'd tone down the killing, but if you look at T2 in particular, you've got robots, time travel, a young protagonist and a journey/quest structure. All the ingredients you need for an adventure cartoon!

Army of Darkness: notice I've not said "The Evil Dead". Focussing on the third film, following a goofy, funny young guy teleported into ancient times and having to use his wit and some modern gadgets to fight an evil army of skeletons. That'd work!

Inception: ditch all the stuff about tokens and suicide and Leo's faceless kids, and focus on a mismatched team who use futuristic technology to enter the minds/dreamworlds of various people. Plenty of child-friendly materiel to be mined there.

Mad Max: what?! But seriously, a post-apocalyptic adventure where grumpy father-figure Max leads a team of raggedy kids to try to find salvation across a dangerous desert. No need for the creepy visuals or social subtext. Just a fun ride.

From Dusk Till Dawn: ditch George and Quentin, and just focus on Harvey Keitel and his kids; driving across Mexico in an RV, fighting vampires. What kid wouldn't wanna watch that?

It: it already stars a bunch of kids, fighting an evil clown. Tone down the scares, lose the extreme violence, forget about the adults, and you're onto a winner. And maybe get rid of the bit where they all have sex in the sewer.

An American Werewolf in London: an American exchange student living in London is bitten and realises he's slowly turning into a werewolf, at which point he meets fellow teens in a society of werewolves... oh, this is just turning into Wolfblood really, isn't it?

The Shining: a whimsical, Gaiman-esque tale about a man, his wife, and their young boy – who happens to have magic powers. Their task? To guard a mysterious old hotel from strange paranormal visitors! Could the very hotel itself be... alive?!

Grand Theft Auto: okay, hear me out. It's a teen drama of a kind perfected by CBBC, following a gang of petty car thieves and their various interpersonal dealings. Will they fall in with the local mob? Will they choose the straight and narrow? With bloodless car chases and no swearing!

Blade Runner: teen drama in the vein of Wolfblood or Eve (or possibly even a YA series!) following a group of young Replicants. Are they human? Do they have souls? What's it like feeling sixteen but knowing you'll be dead within a couple of years? Angst! Drama! Robots!

#top ten #grim and gritty #alternative childrens stories #kids tv #kids films #r-rated #safe for work

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wbwest · 8 years ago

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New Post has been published on WilliamBruceWest.com

New Post has been published on http://www.williambrucewest.com/2017/01/18/west-year-ever-pop-culture-review-2016/

West YEAR Ever: Pop Culture In Review - 2016

Thank 8 pound, 6 ounce newborn Baby Jesus that 2016 is over! I mean, I guess there was some good stuff peppered in there, but it was an overall rough year for a lot of people. I tried to keep my sanity here on the blog, but even I checked out for the month of November. Like Kenny Rogers told us, sometimes you’ve gotta know when to walk away. But I did make a return in December just to kick the year in the ass on its way out. So, besides celebrity deaths, what did 2016 bring us? Well, there was that week we were all mesmerized by Pokemon Go! Those were fun times. We got new X-Files episodes. Peyton Manning retired after winning the Super Bowl with the Denver Broncos. Atlanta and Luke Cage came along and entertained us on television. And things weren’t too shabby here on the blog either.

During Spring Break Week, I discussed several of the most underrated TV theme songs, including Webster, California Dreams, and Enterprise.

I also covered the worst Batman comic ever written, in the form of Just Imagine Stan Lee’s Batman

I did my annual Fall TV Upfronts post, where I discussed the upcoming fall lineups of the major broadcast networks.

A post that was several years in the making, I ranked the Hot Moms of Teen Shows over on The Robot’s Pajamas

I also did a guest post ranking the hottest Power Rangers Villains

It wasn’t all fun and games, though. The country was going through some dark stuff, and I’m particularly proud of this West Week Ever where I discussed the racial problems in the country.

I also experience my first live wrestling event as I attended a taping of WWE Monday Night Raw.

I brought back my graphic novel review column, Adventures West Coast, where I covered Wonder Woman: Earth One.

I also brushed off my Comical Thoughts column, where I discussed IDW’s disappointing Hasbro-centric Revolution event.

Finally, I closed out the year with a post that I’m particularly proud of, discussing the greatest problems facing comic retailers.

I saw about 13 fewer movies in 2016 than in 2015. It wasn’t for lack of trying, but there are only so many hours in the day. As you know, I’m not necessarily Mr. Movie, so I’m not even going to try to rank them. Here they are, simply in the order that I saw them. Wanna know my thoughts? Plug the title into the search box up on the top righthand corner!

Movies I Watched This Year

Lucy

Beauty Shop

Bikini Spring Break

Fifty Shades of Grey

X-Men: Days of Future Past (The Rogue Cut)

We Don’t Live Here Anymore

Gone Girl

Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs 2

The Martian

Inside Out

Sisters

Batman: Bad Blood

Son of Batman

Batman vs. Robin

The Hundred-Foot Journey

Tomorrowland

Deadpool

San Andreas

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules

Autism In Love

Cop Car

Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice

Dead 7

Justice League vs. Teen Titans

Pacific Rim

All Things Must Pass: The Rise and Fall of Tower Records

CHAPPiE

Unhung Hero

Trainwreck

Confirmation

The Boss

Captain America: Civil War

They Live

Ted 2

Creed

Zoolander 2

The Ladykillers

10 Cloverfield Lane

X-Men: Apocalypse

The Intern

You’re F@#k’n Dead!

LEGO DC Comics: Batman Be-Leaguered

LEGO DC Comics Superheroes: Justice League: Attack of the Legion of Doom

Focus

The Good Dinosaur

Sleeping with Other People

Big Hero 6

Keanu

Southpaw

The Night Before

The Equalizer

The Bronze

Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping

Batman: The Killing Joke

Sharknado: The 4th Awakens

Suicide Squad

The Day

Kingsman: The Secret Service

Independence Day: Resurgence

Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children

Meet The Hitlers

Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising

Doctor Strange

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

West Week Ever Recipients of 2016 (with commentary)

1/8/16 – Fall Out Boy’s “Irresistible” video

I’m a huge boyband fan, so the news that one of my favorite bands (Fall Out Boy) had reimagined the It’s Gonna Be Me video by one of my favorite boybands (*NSYNC) definitely made my week. The sheer fact that it didn’t really move the world of pop culture, however, shows you how slow of a news week it was. There would be many weeks like this in 2016.

1/15/16 – Power Rangers

This was quite the week for the Power Rangers franchise. First off, it was revealed that Saban would be skipping the train-centric sentai series Ressha Sentai ToQger, and instead adapt Shuriken Sentai Ninninger as Power Rangers Ninja Steel. This announcement was almost a year to the date of the premiere of the show (scheduled to debut next Saturday), and we spent the next few months getting casting and toy news about the show. Meanwhile, the #0 issue of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers comic was released by Boom! that week, setting up a series that is so much better than it has any right to be. I’ve written about it several times over the year, as I’m a big fan. And finally, former Wild Force Red Ranger actor Ricardo Medina was formally charged that week for killing his roommate with a sword. All in all, I think Power Rangers truly earned the West Week Ever that week.

1/22/16 – DC Entertainment

The Suicide Squad trailer was released this week, as well as the series premiere of Legends of Tomorrow. The Suicide Squad promotion machine would see its ups and downs over the year, the Legends premiere was fairly strong, even with a bunch of useless characters (I’m looking at you, Hawks). The show would get stronger in its second season, but this is where it all started. We also got a DC movie special hosted by Kevin Smith, giving us some Wonder Woman and Justice League footage. Marvel usually dominates the news cycle, but DC showed that they can also step up to the plate.

1/29/16 – The X-Files

When news of an X-Files revival hit, it was pretty big news. Then it launched, and it wasn’t exactly what folks were expecting. Clocking in at 6 episodes, only half of them focused on the conspiracy aspect of the show, plus they were aired out of order. I went from really liking the premiere to completely forgetting it existed, in a very short amount of time. If it was going to get the WWE, it would had to have been this week of the premiere, as it ended with more of a whimper than a bang.

2/5/16 – UnderScoopFire Podcast

I appeared on the UnderScoopFire Podcast 8 times over the years, and had a great time on every one of them. Those guys are some of my good friends that I’ve met online, so of course I was sad to see it go. After 150 shows (give or take a few. Yeah, I’m not letting that go!), I think their swan song deserved the West Week Ever.

2/12/16 – Denver Broncos

I couldn’t give two shits about sports, but Lindsay’s from Denver, so we’re a Broncos household. So, everything was coming up Milhouse this week, as the Broncos won Super Bowl 50. Not only was it a nice, round, milestone number, but it also served as future Hall of Famer Peyton Manning’s final game. It was the perfect storybook ending that sports fans seem to love so much. So, yeah, they totally deserved the West Week Ever.

2/19/16 – Deadpool

Deadpool came out and blew away everyone’s expectations. I mean, this thing is getting nominated for awards. And not Razzies, too! Personally, I thought it was too gratuitous. I’ve gone over my reasoning before, so I won’t rehash that here. Still, it went on to become the second highest grossing superhero film of the year, just behind Captain America: Civil War. Totally deserved.

3/4/16 – Fuller House

After Girl Meets World came along, the runway was cleared for any and every nostalgic reboot to come along. And along came Fuller House. Every fan of TGIF awaited it with bated breath, hoping for the same mindless entertainment they got from the original show. And it did not disappoint! The second season just debuted a few weeks ago, and it’s already been picked up for a 3rd on Netflix. This show not only showed the power of Netflix as a home for original comedies, but also showed that old dogs still have some fight left in them. I think this was definitely the high point of that week.

3/11/16 – Jay Pharaoh

This was a slow week. Sure, Pharaoh did an amazing impersonation spree during that week’s Saturday Night Live Weekend Update. Like, it was AMAZING. And to pay him back, the show fired him at the end of the season. He’s OK, as he immediately booked a Showtime pilot, but the fact that this was the most noteworthy thing of the week shows how slow things were.

3/18/16 – Nothing

Some weeks you’ve just gotta call a spade a spade. Instead of insulting anyone’s intelligence, nothing had the West Week Ever.

3/25/16 – Wonder Woman

Like a lot of people, I did not like Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice. Like a lot of people, I also felt that Wonder Woman was the brightest spot in that dark film. Totally deserved

4/1/16 – Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice

I may not have liked it. A lot of folks may not have liked it. But it made some money. A lot of money. And it was the true springboard to DC’s cinematic universe. So, for its money-making and its importance, I think it earned the West Week Ever. Just because I don’t like something doesn’t mean that it’s bad. It just wasn’t for me.

4/8/16 – American Idol

Idol‘s series finale aired that week, marking the end of a pop culture juggernaut. Unlike The Voice, Idol actually created household names. It gave us Kelly Clarkson, Clay Aiken, Carrie Underwood, and Fantasia. On the flip side, it also gave us William Hung, Taylor Hicks, and Daughtry. It spawned so many copycats, but it was the original recipe. Its influence may have waned in later years, but no one can deny what it was in its heyday. I think it’ll eventually come back, but this was when we said “Ta ta, for now.”

4/15/16 – Marvel

That week, we found out Natalie Portman wasn’t coming back for Thor: Ragnarok, we got a teaser trailer for Doctor Strange, an we learned that the new Spider-Man movie would be called Spider-Man: Homecoming. Marvel definitely dominated the news cycle that week.

4/22/16 – Harriet Tubman

While it was pretty monumental that a woman (a Black woman, mind you) would be adorning American currency, it doesn’t really move the pop culture needle that much. So, I ended up giving the West Week Ever to a dead woman – in a column that has a pretty strict No Death policy. This was kind of a slow week…

4/29/16 – Beyoncé

The singer dropped the surprise album Lemonade following their airing of her HBO special. One of the songs alluded to the possibility that her husband, Jay-Z, might have cheated on her. For the next week, everyone was pondering the identity of “Becky, with the good hair”. This is the kind of thing the drives pop culture. Totally deserved.

5/6/16 – Captain America: Civil War

I had seen the movie, and thought it was excellent.

5/13/16 – Captain America: Civil War

Then the movie made a lot of money. I mean, a fuckton of money.

5/20/16 – Nothing

It was just one of those weeks

5/27/16 – DC Universe: Rebirth #1

DC Comics lost a lot of fans after the New 52 event, in which they rebooted their universe. So, the Rebirth event was something of a mea culpa to those fans. More like a “Please come back! We promise to make stuff you’ll like again!” And for the most part it has worked. This special not only brought fan favorite Wally West back into the fold, but it also sort of introduced the Watchmen comic into the mainstream DC universe. We don’t yet know how that’s all going to play out, but this move helped DC to dominate more market share than Marvel for most of the year.

6/3/16 – Ecto-Cooler

I never really liked Ecto-Cooler. I mean, it tasted kinda like tropical piss, but I loved the fact that Slimer was on the box. That’s about where my nostalgia ended. But a lot of y’all out there LOVED that shit! So, when it was announced that Coca Cola was bringing it back in conjunction with the Ghostbusters movie, y’all started assembling street teams to track it down. I swear, if the 2016 election had been run in a manner similar to the vim and vigor displayed trying to track down green sugar water, I might actually have some hope for tomorrow!

6/10/16 – Awesome Con 2016

Slow week. Cool show, great company, but slow week.

6/17/16 – Hamilton

I discovered the Hamilton soundtrack the same week that it won 11 of the 16 Tony Awards for which it was nominated. We’ll talk more about the show later, but the West Week Ever was deserved, even if the wins did fall short of the Tony Award record.

6/24/16 – Black actors in Hollywood

This was more of a joke, as every Black actor in Hollywood was being cast in the upcoming Black Panther film. That trend has continued since this post. Still, slow news week.

7/1/16 – The 683 New Members of the Oscar Academy

Another joke. Due to the #OscarsSoWhite hashtag, signifying that the Academy was lacking in diversity, 683 people were invited to be members, bolstering the number of women and minorities. Still, slow news week.

7/8/16 – TNA’s The Final Deletion

Oh, man! This thing was incredible. They went on to milk it for the rest of the year, andI missed all subsequent installments. Still, this got me to pay attention to a wrestling promotion not owned by Vince McMahon, and for a brief moment, all wrestling eyes were on TNA to see what Matt Hardy would do next. Completely deserved.

7/15/16 – Pokemon GO!

This game came along and took the world by STORM. To say it was a success would be an understatement. It was envisioned to promote fitness, as kids would have to walk around to find perks and to get their eggs to hatch, but there were workarounds. Hell, I drove around looking for Pokestops. For about 4 weeks, this was all anyone could talk about. It was the Tamagotchi of a new generation, and I think, outside of all the political stuff, it’s one of the things we’ll remember most about 2016.

7/22/16 – Ghostbusters

It was a slow week, but Ghostbusters and the Republican National Convention were the only newsworthy events of the week. As much as we want to pile on that movie, it did take in a respectable $46 million, and it set a record for Paul Feig/Melissa McCarthy movies. I know a lot of folks don’t feel the movie’s deserving of any kind of accolades. As you saw above, I didn’t watch it, but I still think it’s not as bad as people would like me to believe. I swear, though, had they named it anything other than Ghostbusters, we’d still be talking about it.

7/29/16 – DC Entertainment

DC, back with their SECOND West Week Ever of the year? The word on the street was that they “won” San Diego Comic Con, with their new footage of Justice League, as well as the debut of the Wonder Woman trailer. Considering Marvel usually dominates SDCC, this was a feat worth acknowledging.

8/12/16 – Suicide Squad

The movie made $160 million in 5 days, which is nothing to sneeze at. Plus, I actually enjoyed it. I didn’t like it as a component of DC’s cinematic world building, but I liked it as a standalone thing on its own.

8/19/16 – Ryan Lochte

He was an Olympian at the center of a fake robbery attempt in a foreign country, who then fled to let his teammates take the fall. It’s the stuff of a great Aaron Spelling show. He had the West Week Ever simply because he got away with it.

8/26/16 – Guardians trailer

Slow news week, even if the trailer is pretty awesome. Billed as “Russia’s Avengers”, the English version of Guardians trailer started making the rounds because of its crazy action and gun-wielding bear man. Yeah, you’ve gotta see it to believe it. The movie might not even be released over here, and if it is, it’ll never get higher than cult status. Still, if you want to know what everyone was talking about that week, it was Guardians.

9/2/16 – Are You Being Served? one-off special

Some might say this was a slow news week, but I think this applied the West Week Ever to an international stage when I typically just focus on the US. After all, this special didn’t even air in America (nor has it since, nor do there seem to be plans to do so in the future), and I had to resort watching it on YouTube. Still, I grew up with Are You Being Served? and I was more than curious to see how an update of it might hold up. With a few small exceptions, it was pitch perfect, and definitely in the spirit of the original series. This one might’ve been a bit personal for me, but I think it was the best part of this particular week.

9/9/16 – Atlanta

The show just won the Golden Globe for Best Comedy Series. I think I called this one correctly.

9/16/16 – Better Late Than Never

Another personal one for me, but it’s my site, so whatever. I’m more than certain none of my friends were watching this show, but I watched it weekly with my mom and we enjoyed it. I wrote about it to get folks to seek it out, but I doubt that happened. Still, in a week when nothing happens, things like this are allowed to shine.

9/23/16 – Lindsay West

Mah wife. Running your first half marathon is pretty impressive. And nothing happened in the overall pop culture world. If you’ve followed West Week Ever since the beginning, you know that every so often some random person gets the honor. Hell, last year, my kid had the West Year Ever, so you never know where I might play that card.

10/7/16 – Luke Cage

It broke Netflix! So many people tuned in that Netflix couldn’t handle it. I still haven’t seen it, but I haven’t heard a bad thing about it other than the fact that it kinda drags in the middle – like most Marvel Netflix shows.

10/14/16 – Will & Grace

Considering I think I was the only one impressed by this Will & Grace special that was designed to get folks to get out and vote, I’m sure a lot of folks disagreed with this choice. Still, if you were a Will & Grace fan, then you can’t deny how great it was to see those characters in a way that felt like they’d never left us.

10/21/16 – Logan trailer

Can’t say much more because the movie’s not out yet, but we were ALL talking about this after it dropped, and it’s on most folks’ most anticipated movies of 2017 lists. I don’t think it’s going to disappoint.

10/28/16 – The Walking Dead

I don’t watch it, but I did tune into this episode just to watch a man die. Or two men. Whatever. All folks could talk about this week was whether or not the show had gone too far. The Walking Dead dominated the discussion, so this West Week Ever was well-deserved.

11/4/16 – The Chicago Cubs

Um, the “cursed” team won their first championship after 108 years. Yeah, this was deserved.

12/2/16 – Search Party

I don’t feel like a lot of my readers had seen the show when I wrote this, but I know a few who checked it out because I’d written about it. That’s why I do this, kids! It was one of my favorite shows of 2017, and if you haven’t checked it out yet, I’m not quite sure what you’re waiting for.

12/9/16 – Hamilton

Hamilton for the second time this year. The last time was for its Tony wins, but this one was two-fold: The Hamilton Mixtape was released and a beautifully pirated copy of the play was uploaded to YouTube. I watched it during the 5 days that it was allowed to stay on the site, and I can now die saying that I saw Hamilton. This was on the heels of a controversy where the cast members took a moment to address Vice President-Elect Mike Pence while he was taking in the show. For the next week, the conversation was whether or not they should’ve done that. So, it’s safe to say that Hamilton was on everyone’s lips around that time.

12/16/16 – WWE’s New Day

Yeah, then the lost two days after I posted this. I guess that’s how the cookie crumbles. Still, they deserved the West Week Ever for all they had put in leading up to this point.

12/23/16 – Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

It was the last thing to make a dent in pop culture before the clock ran out on 2016. A lot of folks are saying it’s one of their favorite Star Wars movies. I don’t really get that, but I’m happy for them if that’s the case. I thought it was entertaining, but I didn’t really like it. It’s hard to explain, and I’ve tried. Still, there’s no way anything else is going to take center stage when there’s new Star Wars to be consumed.

So, who had the West Year Ever? In the past, I’ve added up who had the most West Week Ever wins and then it’s a runoff. If we’re being honest, Death had the West Year Ever. There were SO many celebrity deaths this year, that it would take another post just to do a proper In Memoriam for everyone we lost. And of course, you have those guys who wanna “Neil deGrasse Tyson” everything by pointing out that people die all the time, or that the year is an arbitrary number. Whatever, asshole. That doesn’t help anybody, and it’s why you don’t get invited to many parties. Anyway, I don’t like to focus on death in West Week Ever -not because it’s morbid, but more because I feel like I’d have to acknowledge every celebrity death, even when I didn’t personally give a shit about that person. Ain’t nobody got time for that!

Doing the math, it’s a three-way tie between DC Entertainment, Captain America: Civil War, and Hamilton. DC Entertainment really stepped up this year, taking a good chunk of the comics market share away from Marvel, as well as by launching their cinematic universe. After years of being the joke of the industry, DC finally started pushing back. And the Rebirth initiative didn’t hurt things, either. Meanwhile, not everyone loved Civil War. I did, but even I’ll admit that it’s basically “Dawn of Justice Done Right”. They’re both superhero slugfests that surround the concept of dead moms. Some called it “Civil Bore”, but I don’t agree with that. Still, I have to kind of acknowledge that there is a divide out there. Finally, there’s Hamilton. It had a big year, but I don’t know if we’ll look back and say “Hamilton really came into its own in 2016.” If anything, that’s more likely to happen at a time when the show can more easily be consumed by the masses. So, Hamilton’s year may actually be ahead of it, but it’s not 2016. So, I think it’s pretty clear. 2016 was the year where retailers stopped buying everything Marvel was selling, and so did the fans. The quality of Marvel’s output was in question more this year than it was in recent years, yet people still seemed to be able to find positive things about the DC Universe. Meanwhile, their movies might not be your cup of tea, but they made money, and the critics haven’t deterred them from forging ahead. So, with that, I believe I simply have to admit that DC Entertainment had the West Year Ever.

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