#i was hungry but the idea of eating made me feel sick which is always a bad sign | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sunflowersandsapphires · 1 year ago

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With your steady hand

Of Oak and Ivy, Chapter 3

Series Masterlist Next Chapter

pairing: Matt Murdock x fem!reader

summary: Matt and Foggy go head to head in a prank war, much to your dismay.

warnings: Swearing, fluff, descriptions of homesickness

a/n: Did I mean to make everyone cry in this chapter? No. But here we are. (Honestly, from what I can remember, crying was a popular pastime my first semester of college.) We get a little Foggy vulnerability as a side dish for the Matt and Reader vulnerability. I had a great time with this chapter so I hope everyone enjoys!

w/c: 5.6k

Worrying your bottom lip between your teeth, you pushed the food around your plate indifferently. Your stomach balked at the idea of eating, but you were aware that you needed to. The only thing you’d eaten in the past 48 hours was dry cereal, and that had to be bad, right?

“You ok?” The quiet, concerned voice of Matt from beside you made you jump. In your groggy haze, you’d completely forgotten he was next to you, and, honestly, that you were out in public at all.

“Yup. Fine. Just not hungry.” Was the bland response you gave. It didn’t appease either of your friends, both of them frowning with worry. You’d been acting…off for over a week now. The cheerful, silly personality that Matt had unwittingly fallen for retreating into a worn out husk of a law student. Though he couldn’t see, Matt would bet dollars to donuts that the bags under your eyes were prominent given how sluggish you’d been recently. Not to mention that you hadn’t spoken up in any class the past few days, which was extremely out of character.

Though Matt was too afraid to admit that he could tell, he knew your blood sugar was extremely low right now. Oddly enough, you weren’t lying when you said you weren’t hungry.

“Are you sure you’re feeling ok?” Foggy prompted, seemingly following the same train of thought that Matt was currently on. “You didn’t eat much. Did you catch that flu that’s been going around?”

You shook your head, giving a thin smile. “Nah, just not hungry. I’m ok, guys, promise.”

But neither guy was convinced by your lackluster argument. After studying quietly in their room, and neglecting a plate of takeout, you muttered something about having chores to do and headed home—much to the dismay of your friends.

“Ok, what the hell is up with her?” Foggy scoffed, feigning annoyance despite the obvious worry in his tone.

“I wish I knew.” Matt affirmed, falling backwards on his bed and throwing his arms over his face.

“She said she wasn’t sick. Did something happen?” Foggy questioned.

“She might be stressed, midterms will do crazy things to people.”

“Yah, but when she gets stressed about school she is usually all…ramble-y and stuff. Not like this. It’s like she’s not even here.” The air in the room swished as Foggy gestured wildly, his passionate concern aggravating his already violent hand movements.

“I know, Fog.”

“You should try talking to her. She’s more likely to tell you.” Foggy accused, rolling his eyes.

Matt just snorted in disbelief.

“You laugh, but we both know it’s true. You have a ‘special connection.’” The blond’s voice swayed on the last two words, as if he were a middle schooler pointing out Matt’s crush.

“Bullshit.” Matt snarked.

“You wound me, Murdock. You think the heart eyes you two are always making at each other can escape my powers of observation?” What?

“How on earth does a blind man make ‘heart eyes’ at someone?” Matt chuckled, trying to cover up the way his chest was pounding at the thought of his feelings for you being returned.

“Uh, you tell me, dude! It’s goddamn unbearable. Not only are 90% of the women on this campus ogling you at all times, but you’re too infatuated with our mutual friend to even notice, and you refuse to date her. How am I even supposed to flap my wingman wings?!”

“I told you, Foggy, she deserves better than I can treat her.” Matt groaned at his roommate’s insistence.

“Yah, yah, lie to me all you want, Murdock, I’m taking notes for my best man speech at your wedding.” Foggy shook his finger at Matt who smirked. “Seriously, though. If anyone is going to get to the bottom of whatever’s going on with her, it’s you.”

“Hmm, I know she works tonight, I’ll see if she’ll talk to me about it during her shift.” Matt plotted aloud.

“Keep me updated, man. I worry about that little jitterbug. She’s too sweet for this cruel world.” Foggy sighed, running a hand through his long hair.

“Unfortunately, I think you’re right about that.”

Breathing shakily, you ripped the elastic out of your hair and began massaging your temples, to no avail. The pounding ache that had settled over your skull remained, increasing the likelihood that you’d burst into tears from ‘pretty likely’ to ‘it’s a miracle the breakdown hasn’t started yet’. Feeling a lump build in your esophagus, you turned to Jen, who was working at the bookstore with you as you slowly fell apart.

“You ok, babes?” Your roommate prompted, attentive gaze not missing your glassy eyes and choked inhales.

Not trusting your voice, you shook your head, looking at her pleadingly as your lip quivered.

“Aw, love!” Jen pulled you into a hug, siphoning tears from your eyes almost immediately. “What’s wrong? Still missing your mom?”

“Mmm hmm.” You choked out around a sob. Squeezing you tightly, she hummed in understanding.

“Why don’t you go sit in the back for a little bit? I’ll be fine holding down the fort.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive, babes. Go watch a movie or something. I’ll yell if I need ya.”

Nodding dolefully, you rubbed at your damp eyes and padded to the closet-sized employee break room in the corner of the bookshop.

Twisting his cane in his sweaty hands, Matt blew out a breath before entering the quiet store. His walk over from campus had been tumultuous despite the short distance. It had quickly occurred to him that cornering you at work might not be the best plan of action, unless alienating you whilst ruining the beautiful trust you currently held for him was the goal.

Against his better judgment, he shoved open the door, trying not to wince as the bell chimed to signal his arrival. Hesitating for a moment, Matt realized it wasn't you at the counter, but your roommate.

“Hi Matt!” Jen greeted him. “Nice to see you again.”

“You too, Jen,” Matt smiled, though the knot of nervousness in his stomach was expanding after hearing your soft cries coming from the break room. “Is, uh, is she working tonight?”

The older girl hummed knowingly, “Yah, she's in the back.” Matt thanked her but she called after him before he could find you. “Just, be gentle with her, ok? She's having a tough week.”

Nodding in understanding, Matt gave what he hoped was a comforting 'I promise not to spook our mutual friend' thumbs up, setting off to keep you company.

Knocking on the open door lightly, Matt heard you sniffle and scrub at your face in an attempt to look put together before responding. “I'll be right out, Jen—”

“Not Jen.” He answered simply. “Just a friend who thought you might want some company.”

Your muffled footsteps wandered towards him, pulling the door ajar when you reached it.

Matt's confidence stumbled, your salty tears and wavering breaths immediately setting him on edge. “Tell me to fuck off and I'll leave. I just thought—” His words were interrupted by a grunt of surprise as you fell solidly against him, arms winding around his waist.

“Hey,” His hands slid up to anchor you, one sprawled over your shoulders while the other stroked your hair to offer succor when you began to tremble with renewed sobs. “Hey, you're alright, I gotcha. I gotcha.”

Wiping your face with one hand, you stood up, removing your arms from around him. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cry all over your shirt. Shit, I'm so sorry, Matty.”

“Don't worry about that, sweetheart.” Matt's hand drifted to your clammy cheek, swiping a stray tear away when it fell. “That's why I'm here. You…” He paused, choosing his next words carefully. “You seemed like midterms were weighing on you, and I thought you could use some extra support. Let's go sit, yah?” Tenderly taking your hand, he let you guide him to the musty couch, closing the door behind you.

As Matt collapsed into the ancient cushions, he could feel the plumes of dust rising from the impact. Scrunching his nose against the resulting tickle, he eagerly enveloped you in his arms, pressing a kiss to your head when you settled against his chest. “Did you want to talk about what's going on? You had Foggy and I quite worried when you ran out on us this afternoon.”

Exhaling shakily, you unconsciously arched into his touch, his hands rubbing slow circles into your lower back. “I don't know, Matty. I...it's a long story, I'm sure you don't want–”

Feeling you tense up beneath him, Matt could practically hear your thoughts as you distanced him from the root of your vulnerability. “Don’t shut me out, sweetheart, please. Anything you want to share I will gladly listen to.”

“It’s stupid. You’re going to think I’m a baby.” You murmured, tracing the buttons on his shirt.

“I would never, bubs, you know that. You’re the strongest girl I know, that’s why I’m so worried about you.”

“You don’t have to worry about me, Matty.”

“Well, tell me what’s up with you and maybe I’ll stop.” He smirked at you and you groaned, though your lips twitched marginally.

You muttered something under your breath and, though he could hear you just fine, he scrunched his brow dramatically. “You’re going to need to speak up, dear, I didn’t catch that.” He cupped a hand around one ear, grinning when you rolled your eyes and shoved him.

“I said…I really miss my mom.” You admitted feebly.

“Aw, sweetheart, that’s not stupid at all!” Matt’s expressive face pinched in sympathy as he waited for you to continue.

“I’ve been talking to her over the phone pretty frequently but it’s not the same. She’s all I had growing up, I’m not used to her not being…here. God, that’s so childish!”

“No, it’s not. I may not be homesick for the orphanage, but I haven’t had the easiest time adjusting either.”

“Really?”

“Yah, bubs, really. There are things about this new freedom that I enjoy, of course, but I do miss the familiarity of my old routine. It’s not childish, I promise.” Running his hands over your arms, he smirked. “You know what is childish?”

“What?”

Bending at the waist, Matt drew his cane from the floor and turned it to display the two plastic circles that had been haphazardly slapped on the black foam handle. Taking the cane from him, you traced a finger over the new decorations and giggled.

“What the fuck?” Disbelief and humor slowly halting your tears, you looked eagerly to Matt for an explanation. Two standard googly eyes, placed at a lopsided angle, wiggled at you as you passed him back the item in question.

“My thoughts exactly.” Matt chuckled. “Foggy bought a bag of googly eyes at the dollar store and has been sticking them to everything in our room. I had to pull a pair off of my glasses before coming over here.”

“You should’ve left them on. Let everyone know what a serious law student you are.” You snickered, snuggling against Matt’s chest again. “Why, exactly, did he choose to do this?”

Matt chuckled, “I think it was his idea of a prank. Pretty minor offense, though. He’s told me horror stories about the things he and his brother used to do.” Shuddering, he bit his lip to keep from purring as you began rubbing his back. “It’s kind of…sweet though? I think it’s his way of showing me I’m like family.”

His throat clenched as he spoke that realization. You smiled, squeezing him tightly. “That is sweet, Matty. I hope you realize how much we care for you.”

“We?” The dark haired boy can barely contain his tease as he gave you the most innocent glance he can muster.

“Shut up, trouble. You know I care about you. Even if I’m not putting googly eyes on all your stuff. To be fair, though, I don’t think I’ve ever pranked anyone.”

“Really?” Chuckling incredulously, Matt was surprised that you’d never played a practical joke, given your adorable goofiness and slight pettiness.

“Not that I can recall. Is that weird?” Your mind was quick to plummet back into anxiety, worrying that Matt would be alarmed by your lack of a normal childhood.

“Of course not, bubs. It just seems like something you’d find funny, is all.”

“Aren’t they…mean?” The hesitation in your voice didn’t surprise him, his heart suddenly swelling with an intense desire to shelter you from anything harmful.

“Sometimes, but not the ones I’m planning.” He assured you.

“What did you have planned?”

“Well…” Matt eagerly divulged his schemes, egged on by your renewed giggles and steady heart. If pranking Foggy would make you happy, he’d gladly involve you in it.

A few days later, you were practically glowing with excitement as you “studied” beside Matt. Echoing footsteps in the hallway outside the door sparked a gasp and you spun towards Matt eagerly.

“Is that him? Is he here?” You nearly squealed.

Chuckling at your darling, albeit very caffeinated, display of giddiness about a terrible prank, Matt shushed you. “That’s not him, sweetheart, but you have to keep your game face on.”

Raising your arm in a mock salute, you jested. “Sir, yes sir.”

Dutifully returning to the book on your lap, you took a few inadequate notes on the chapter before the door unlatched, Matt threw you a grin. “Act natural.”

Foggy traipsed into the room, immediately picking up on the unusual vibes in the air.

“Hey…” Looking between you and Matt skeptically, he dropped his book bag to the floor unceremoniously before crossing his arms over his chest. “Didn’t know we had a study group meeting today.”

“Oh we don’t, I was just bored so I called Matt to see if the two of you wanted to hang out.” You shrugged nonchalantly, turning a page in your Civil Procedure book.

Matt was absolutely floored when the lie slipped between your sweet lips with sincerity. Given all the energy you’d exhibited before, he’d assumed you’d reveal the prank far too early. Trying not to look at you with the surprise that overtook his mind, he added, “I told her that I was studying for CivPro and invited her over. Is that a problem?”

Foggy narrowed his eyes at the pair of you, clearly not convinced something fishy wasn’t afoot. But his disbelief didn’t save him. Vaulting himself onto his semi-lofted bed, an inglorious noise shattered the tense silence in the room.

As you burst into a fit of uncontrollable giggles, Matt was forced to continue to prank on his own. “Oh my god, Foggy, we have company.”

Turning beet red, the blond spluttered in response, “That wasn’t—I mean, I…SHUT UP!” Ripping back the covers, Foggy found the culprit instantly and hurled it towards Matt.

With a smug grin, Matt tilted his head towards the scrap of thin rubber. “What is this, Fog?”

“You know damn well what it is, you ass!” Foggy scowled, hopping off his mattress to point at Matt accusingly. “A Whoopie Cushion?? What are we, five??”

Still in stitches, you were leaning against Matt who was holding you up with a single arm. Foggy was unamused. “You know, I expect this childishness from Murdock, but you?” The long-haired law student bit out your last name as if he were a teacher scolding you for distracting the other students. “I expected better of you. Fuck this, I’m leaving.”

That broke you out of your state of humor. Launching yourself off of Matt’s bed, you stumbled towards your sulking friend with less grace than intended. Your over caffeination and extended time sitting had quickly drained the blood from your head. “Foggy, wait—Woah…” You swayed on your feet. Thankfully, Foggy caught you before you could hit the carpeted cement with your entire body weight.

“Christ, jitterbug, you don’t have to pass out on me to keep me here.” He sighed, handing you gratefully back to Matt who pulled you into a seated position at his side once again.

“Sorry,” You apologized sheepishly, “Got light headed. But please don’t leave! Matt was just teaching me how to prank someone.”

“She’d never pranked anyone before.” Matt explained further.

“Never?” Foggy whistled. “Fuck. Guess you’re forgiven then. Murdock, you’re still on my shit list.”

“For a Whoopie cushion? I’m sorry, are you not the roommate who covered a blind man’s stuff in googly eyes?”

“Et tu, brute!” Laying a hand across his chest in mock offense, Foggy’s eyes glimmered as he continued to play up his innocence. “I’ve already told you. That was our mischievous ghost roommate, Steve.”

“Ah, right. Then I guess we can blame him for the Whoopie cushion too.” Matt raised an eyebrow, silently challenging his roommate.

The blond mirrored him, accepting the challenge with an even tone. “I guess we can.”

Looking between the two of them, you felt a lick of apprehension roll up your spine. This was far from the end, that much was clear.

Dashing up the musty staircase, Matt fumbled with his keys. Slamming open the door, he ran his hands along the spines of books beside his bed, snatching the correct one. The book was tossed haphazardly onto the bed as Matt stripped out of his rain-drenched shirt.

Last night had quickly gotten away from him. Originally planning to stay up late and study for his final midterm, he’d parked himself in the library with a thermos of coffee and his American History textbook. Given your tendency to unwittingly distract him, and his roommate’s constant foghorn-like snoring, alone in the library was the most appealing option if he wanted to pass this exam. However, his sex drive was not as devoted to his academic success. A bubbly girl from his history class had greeted him, offering to help him cram for the looming test. He’d gratefully accepted, but they’d only made it through a single chapter before she’d invited him back to her room.

Exhausted from his strenuous activities and the resulting lack of sleep, he’d inevitably overslept. His internal clock was apparently not as effective as the blaring alarm that he normally used. Sprinting home through the deluge of rain, he had mere minutes to change and get to Legal Methods.

So here he was, relinquishing his soaked through button up to the floor as he plucked the first shirt from his dresser. Flinging on the shirt–which had short sleeves for some reason–and his raincoat, he flew out the door and towards his class.

He was barely late, but you still looked at him smugly when he finally plopped down beside you, eliciting a few laughs from other students in the classroom.

“About time you showed up, trouble. How was your night?” You murmured, trying not to draw any more attention to the two of you.

He didn’t need sight to know you were dramatically wiggling your eyebrows at him. “You heard about that, huh?” He asked, blushing furiously. While he was depressingly still hung up on you, the raw animalistic desires that composed his Id could only be suppressed for so long.

“Oh Foggy spared no detail when we got coffee this morning.”

Trying his damndest not to feel miffed that you’d had coffee with only his roommate, he aimed for a nonchalant tone. “Coffee with Fog, huh?”

“Well, it could have been both of you if you’d answered your phone.” You chuckled softly, shaking your head at the subtle pout on Matt’s face. “Don’t worry, trouble, you’re still my best guy.”

For a moment, all Matt could feel was the stutter of his heart. “Oh–uh, that’s,” He stammered, face glowing with a crimson blush. You giggled at his response.

“So is the raincoat a permanent fixture or did you just forget to take it off?”

Matt rolled his eyes, “Well, someone started talking to me and I got distracted.” Unzipping the vinyl jacket, he began to pry it off when a choking sound from you halted his movements.

“What?” He muttered, with feigned exasperation.

“Is that a new shirt?” You bit your lip to keep from laughing, already speculating just who had purchased that garment. The button down looked nothing like the simple ones Matt usually donned, and he usually dressed more conservatively in longer sleeved garments–there was no way he had purchased this fabric of his own free will.

Unlike the dark sweaters and monochrome shirts that made up the rest of his wardrobe, this shirt was…colorful, to say the least. The pattern was a horrendous combination of flames and hawaiian style flowers. A ring of scarlet cartoon hibiscus blossoms sat atop Matt’s waistline, composing a base for the flames, which looked like they’d been pulled off of a racist’s motorcycle.

Matt ran a hand along the hem, tilting his head in confusion. “This isn’t my shirt, is it?”

Stifling another round of giggles, you shook your head. “I don’t believe so, no.”

“You’re laughing. Fuck, what does it look like?”

“Um, it’s got flowers and…fire on it? Definitely not your style.”

“Shit!” Matt hissed, zipping up his coat as quietly as he could. “Foggy must’ve put it in my dresser.”

You bit back a smile, turning your attention to the professor who had begun looking for students to pick on.

After a few hours of legal jargon flowing in one ear and out the other, Matt could barely sit still—his mind already planning the trip home to inspect the rest of his clothes, which he assumed had also been replaced. Though he’d been willing to beg for your assistance, he’d only needed to ask for you to come with once before you agreed sincerely, clearly pitying him and his ugly shirt.

Sure enough, when they’d returned to his dorm and examined the contents of his dresser, it was filled with clothes that were most certainly not his. The textures were all wrong and you confirmed that they were all garishly patterned.

With a low growl, Matt slammed the drawer of his dresser shut, making you jump.

“Hey, it’s ok, we can just ask Foggy to put your stuff back!” You reasoned, placatingly.

Shaking his head with a snarl, he clenched his fists. “Oh no. This means war.”

You gulped, not finding an ounce of sarcasm in his words. If you were Foggy, you’d be begging for forgiveness about now.

The next couple weeks passed in an agonizing blur of lengthy readings and lonely work shifts. Matt and Foggy had doubled down on their efforts to out-prank each other, and it was beginning to take its toll on their relationship.

As the weather turned chilly and fallen leaves began to carpet the ground, you were finding it difficult to be in the same room with the two of them. After the wardrobe incident, Matt had sulked for two days, refusing to hang out with Foggy until he'd had his revenge. Armed with a box of hot pink hair dye and a few permanent markers, Matt was sure he'd be able to make Foggy look as ridiculous as those shirts made him feel. If your shocked reaction was any measurement, he'd say the effort succeeded.

Of course, Foggy rewarded this behavior with a prank of his own. Finding and removing his formerly pristine school supplies from mounds of loose Jello had been a horrendous sensory experience that Matt NEVER wanted to repeat. That was approximately 4 days ago and Matt was STILL finding dried bits of lime jello in his pen caps.

The two continued to trade practical jokes, currently locked in a battle of removing each other’s furniture. He was still working on his most recent prank at your next study group session. With the help of a floormate, Matt had been able to move Foggy's desk, chair, and mattress to the roof of the dorm. Sweating profusely while he heaved the plastic covered mattress up the last flight of stairs, he didn't hear you approaching.

“Whatcha doin'?“ You asked cautiously, taking in the manic determination on full display.

”Pranking...Foggy.” He managed. Fuck he needed to hit a gym.

“Well, that was a given. Do we think that this is still within the realm of friendly teasing? Or...”

“He can sleep on a bed...when my stuff...stops smelling like it's made of fucking fruit.”

“Hmmm. Ok. I'll be in your room then.” You replied, your words tinged with a disappointment that Matt wasn't anticipating. It irked him, pulling at his stressed consciousness uncomfortably. How come you hadn’t shown the same reaction when Foggy had moved his things across the hall a week ago? Shrugging off the guilt he felt, he mustered up the strength to shove the mattress up to its destination.

Huffing breaths as he shuffled down the stairs to you, he couldn't shake the lingering irritation that your tone had implanted in his psyche. You were sitting on folded legs in his bed, textbook open in your lap.

“Ready to study?” You questioned, not glancing up from the text.

“Depends, am I going to get a lecture?”

“On intentional torts? I'm not an expert, but I can definitely try--” Your innocent tone did nothing to soothe his growing frustration.

“That's not what I meant and we both know that.” He bit out, “If you have a problem with it, you can just say so, I'm not made of glass.”

“There's no problem, Matty.” Your heart stuttered and his anger sparked.

“Bullshit.” He scoffed, pacing in front of you.

“I don't know what's up with you and Fog, that's your business, this just seems...extreme, Matt.”

“He took my clothes, that wasn't 'extreme' to you?”

“I didn't say that! I'm just saying this isn't an effective way to communicate that you weren't comfortable with him touching your stuff.”

Rolling his eyes, Matt yanked the door open. “On second thought, I think I'm good with this chapter of torts. I'll see you in class next week.”

“Matt,” He couldn't bear to focus on you, your rapidly crumpling body language, the lump of emotion in your throat.

“Please. I don't want to lose another friend.” He pleaded.

Sighing in defeat, you closed the book and left without a word.

Matt breathed shallowly, matching his inhales to the pattern of your retreating steps as he cursed himself for turning you away. Setting his jaw, he swiped away a drop of moisture from his cheek and set off for the stairs.

It was hours before Foggy got home, out with a group of students from his Modern Dance class. Walking carefully into the dark room, he flipped on the lights and hunkered down on his bed, stripping off his dirty socks before opening his Property textbook.

“Hey Matt, have you started on the Property essay yet?” He asked the stiff lump of a man who lay in his own bed facing the wall.

“No.” Came the gruff response of his surly roommate.

“Shit, I was hoping you'd have started with our jitterbug so I could mooch some tips off you two geniuses.”

Matt didn't so much as snort in response to the bad joke. Instead, he abruptly rolled over and snatched his cane from its place beside the door.

“I'm going for a walk.” Matt remarked, icily.

“Oh, uh, ok did you want—”

“No.” Shutting the door firmly on his way out, Foggy blinked at his shadow as it disappeared.

“Goodnight to you too, I guess” He scoffed, turning back to his assignment with a roll of his eyes.

Setting your jaw, you blew out a breath and knocked on the door. When you received silence in return, you rolled your eyes and knocked with more vigor. “Matthew, Franklin, I know you’re in there!”

A very apprehensive Foggy appeared as the door slid open. Shoving past him and into the room, you gave a furtive smile. “Hello, how are you, I'm also well, thanks for asking.” You rattled off, collapsing into Matt's creaky desk chair.

Foggy was still hovering nervously by the door, avoiding your stern gaze, while Matt courageously pretended not to notice your presence--fingers running over lines of braille in a thick book. Folding your hands together, you plastered on a sardonic grin. “Now that we've got the pleasantries out of the way, I would like to kindly request that you two get your shit together.”

Your blunt words and brash tone ignited defensiveness in them both. Foggy spluttered and Matt turned to face you with a look of indignation.

“What are you–” “We weren't–”

“Cut the crap.” You interrupted the pair, leaning against the frame of the chair and crossing your arms. “You want to fight with each other? Let a stupid prank war drive our group apart? Fine. But the least you can fucking do is grow some balls and tell me that yourselves. I'm tired of the sulking. So, what'll it be? Are we done?”

Both boys sat sheepishly in their own silence. Foggy kicked his feet as if he were a toddler on a swing, Matt looked like a kicked puppy—crimson blush glowing on his cheeks as he pushed up his glasses.

After several moments of hesitant silence, Matt spoke up. “We aren’t done.”

Nodding in relief, you jerked your chin at Foggy, “Fog, you agree?”

“Course I do! There’s no way I’ll graduate without the two of you. It’s in my best interests to keep you happy.” It was clearly meant to seem like a joke, but the way Foggy’s voice trailed off at the end made you tilt your head.

“Hey, you know that’s not true right? You’re plenty capable of doing this on your own!” Frowning, you watched as Foggy’s face crumpled before your legs were moving of their own accord, carrying you to his side as he turned his glossy eyes to his bedspread. “Hey, Fog, I’m serious!”

Running a hand along his shoulder, your heart split in two as fat tears slipped down his face.

“Fog, buddy, you’re so smart!” Matt chimed in, crossing the divide between the two beds and settling on the blond’s over side. Tugging Foggy to rest against your shoulder, Matt’s head stacked against yours atop Foggy’s blond hair–the three of you melding together into a stressed heap as the heightened emotions of the past week culminated.

“It’s true, don’t deny it.” Foggy lamented from his place on your shoulder, strands of his thick hair sticking to the glistening trails that ran across his blotchy cheeks. “I have no idea what I’m doing, I shouldn’t be here! Maybe my parents are right and I should drop out to work in the family store instead.”

“The hell you should! You’re just as capable of this shit as we are.” You assured him, rubbing a hand up and down his sweatshirt clad arm. “And you’re not the only one worried about passing. I freak out about that every day!”

“Yah, but you’re not the one who failed the Civil Procedure midterm.” The long haired boy sobbed.

You froze, second-hand anxiety rippling through you like a stiff breeze. Matt’s head lifted from yours and cocked towards his roommate. “Oh Fog, why didn’t you tell us?”

“You were mad at me and we weren’t hanging out anymore and–and–” The poor kid was bawling, fists clenching around the worn fabric of his pajama pants as feelings of terror and embarrassment welled up in his chest.

“It’s ok, bud, just breathe.” You soothed shakily, trying to model steady breaths for him. Sensing your intentions, Matt smiled encouragingly.

“That’s it, dude. You got it.” When the blond’s breathing evened, Matt nudged his shoulder gently. “I’m really sorry that I pushed you away. I was acting like a fucking middle schooler instead of being honest with you. Just know, you can always always come to me, even if we’re fighting.”

“Same here.” You added, studying Matt’s blank eyes for a moment, “That goes for both of you.”

“Can we go back to being best friends now?” Foggy sniffled, pulling back to look between you and Matt warily.

“We never stopped being best friends, silly,” Pulling Foggy into a tight hug, you huffed a chuckle as he sighed in relief.

“Well, ya could’ve fooled me.” The words were muffled as Foggy continued to press his face into your cardigan.

The bed stirred underneath you as Matt shifted uncomfortably. Clearing his throat, you could see him building up the courage to confess, “I’ve never, uh, I’ve never really had…friends before.” Matt’s words were calculated, trying not to reveal too much anguish as he spoke. “I had a mentor for a bit, at the orphanage, but that was it. So, I’ll admit, I’m not the most…practiced at this.”

“That’s ok, Matty. We can teach you. Right, Fog?” Taking the raven-haired boy’s hand, you waited for the other’s assent.

He nodded viciously, swiping a hand over his damp face. “Of course.”

Squeezing Matt’s hand, you giggled. “You’re stuck with us now, Matty.”

With a satisfied grin, Matt threw an arm over Foggy’s shoulders. “Thank god. Who else will put googly eyes on all my stuff?”

Foggy smiled as you giggled, but his face quickly fell as you brought up studying again. “As for that test Fog, we can go through it together. There’s plenty of time until the end of the semester and we have two other exams. You can do this.”

“You think so?” Biting his lip, Foggy glanced between you and Matt.

“We know so, bud.” Matt promised. “We’re in this together. Right, jitterbug?”

“Ok, where is this ‘jitterbug’ nonsense coming from.” You scoffed, biting back a smile at Matt’s hearty laugh.

“Don’t ask me, Foggy started it!” Matt chuckled.

“Sure, pass the blame to the crying kid!” Rolling his eyes, Foggy elbowed Matt in the chest.

“You’re not even crying anymore!”

“You’re both deflecting!” You butted in, earning new excuses from both boys.

As the three of you argued, you remained a knot of limbs–shadows and pink rays of light dancing across your smiles as the sun set.

Bonus Content: the shirt referenced in Foggy's second prank!!

Taglist: @eugene-emt-roe @abbyhaslongshorts @mrs-bellingham @abucketofweird @yeonalie @jadeunstablexx @spider-murdock @0ctober-writes @danzer8705

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tartagliad · 2 years ago

Text

Not Wanting to Eat

Summary: how would the boys do when you don't want to eat (but you're hungry)

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Characters: Zhongli, Kazuha, and Alhaitham

Genre: Fluff

G/N reader!

Warnings: reader is a bit sick in Alhaitham's

(a/n: I have eating problems.. maybe I'm too exhausted or stressed..? idk, I'm hungry, but nothing sounds good. Even my favourite food doesn't feel right.. I'm ordering cookies for breakfast and it's 10.30 am rn.. it's dumb.. but idk what else, ehe- it's already nighttime by the time this is up.. this is an indulgent of mine, hehe-)

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He knows something's off about you

Your eating patterns are.. let's just say scattered

In the morning, you usually have breakfast with him, which was pretty early

For the last few days, you would eat when the sun is almost high in the sky

You also ate lunch at 4 or 5 pm and not eating dinner AT ALL-

It genuinely makes him worry about your health.. you're an ordinary mortal, he's scared if something bad happens to you..

Night time comes, both of you were enjoying your time with each other

Both of you are currently in the living room, you reading your documents whilst laying your head on his lap

Zhongli was reading a book. His other hand gently stroked your hair

"mmh.." you made a noise, he then looked at you, "is there something the matter..?"

He scans you, you shake your head slowly, "I'm just hungry.." you said. His eyes widens a bit, "I'll make you something then-"

Before he could finish, you cut him "thanks.. but I don't want to eat.." you then continue reading

Excuse me?? It left him speechless, did he do something wrong to make you like this?

"Love, I've noticed you haven't been eating properly. Mind telling me?" he spoke softly

You hesitate a bit, "it's dumb.. but nothing really taste good.. just thinking about it.. I don't know.."

Now, it left him confused.. "Even something you like?" he asked and you nodded

He sighed, gently cupping your cheek and facing you towards him. "You have to eat at some point, whether you like it or not.."

It's true.. you've been eating just because you need energy.. even if your body refused to..

"I'll make you something.. don't worry, it's not going to be in a big portion.. just small will do.." he left a little kiss on your forehead, then walk to the kitchen to cook :3

You smiled to yourself, "how sweet.." you mumbled

It makes your heart flutter on how caring he is <3

Zhongli comes back to you after a few minutes to give you a cup of tea, "Here, not to worry.. it's a softer brew, it'll help your stomach a bit.." he smiled softly

You hummed as a thank you, carefully taking a sip at it. It does made your stomach better

Knowing that you were comforted by it makes him feel relieved a bit..

..He hopes that you could finally eat properly again.. it hurts him that his gem didn't want to eat :''

Usually at the Crux, it's always a large feast for everyone to gather around and eat

It's normal for you and Kazuha to feast together and both of you never missed it

But now it's a bit different

You told Beidou that you're a bit busy and probably going to end up in the room for a bit

She then gave you the idea that you could eat while working, so she then told Kazuha to bring you some food

You thanked her and it was going smoothly until.. you told him just bring the food to you later

Not only that, when both of you are at Liyue, you refuse to eat anything and told him that he can eat first

..he doesn't want to, okay?? :(

Kazuha won't eat if you're not going to (but he ended up eating because from your whines..)

Although you grab a drink or a bite-sized cake to consume.. it doesn't feel the same

It feels wrong for him to eat a full portion of food while you were only having a snack

He DESPERATELY needed you to eat with him or at least let him feed you with his cooking :(

One night, he decided to confront you about this, he knocks the door

''y/n.. it's me" he spoke, you responded with a hum and he then walks in, like usual.. you're working

"Darling, can we talk for a bit..?" he sat on the bed beside you

You then put your pen down, looking at him, "what is it, Kazu?" you tilt your head.

"I realized that you didn't want to eat.. are you okay?" he pats your head.

You kept quiet, you looked at him, hoping for an answer from you, "I just.. didn't feel like it.. although to be fair.. I am hungry..'' you explained, "nothing really tasted good.. even my favourite foods.." you continued

It saddens him.. not wanting to eat although you're hungry is far too concerning..

"My poor sunshine.." he gently pull you to his chest, you leaned your head more

He hums softly, twirling your hair gently

"I don't want you to get sick.. especially busy like this.." he holds you, sniffing your hair, "try to eat, okay..? it'll make you feel better.."

You nodded slowly, leaning against the desk for support you then rest on the bed beside him

Pulling out a bar of chocolate and snapping it, he then feeds it to you, you bite into it, "See? it's good, right..?" kisses your cheek

"It's.. sweet.." "I know.." he chuckled, pecking your lips

"Try to get some rest too, don't stress yourself out.." he smiled, you hummed as you continued eating the chocolate that he feed you

Just by you eating chocolate makes him happy a bit.. but it still a long way for it to go away.. :")

He knows damn well that you're a hardworker, but not this much-

You've been busy with the reports from the Akademiya

It takes quite a bit of your energy, but that's just how it is..

Alhaitham wasn't concerned about anything, he's glad that you have some productivity

After a bit, he noticed somethings wrong with you

When he prepared some snacks for you in your office, it often left untouched

Also, did I mentioned that you also got a bit isolated (EVEN FROM HIM)??

When he happened to met your friends, they told him that you also refused to go eat with them, even if they forced you, you only asked for a drink (non alcohol ofc)

It makes him worried for you, your work is also starting to get a bit more stressful every minute

Often times also, you came home and just continued to work.. not paying attention to him

..how odd he thought, the usual you would greet him with a kiss

Alhaitham then followed to the bedroom, to his surprised, you're not even resting.. you continued working..

His heart sinks a bit, just when did you stop resting..?

Approaching you, he was caught off guard by your soft whimpers

"y/n, what's wrong?" he went beside you quickly, rubbing your shoulder gently

"..mmh.. I feel sick.." you curled up a bit, trying to hold the pain

Holding you close to him, he gently soothes you, "want to go to the bathroom?" he rubs circles on your back

You shake your head, leaning more towards him, he then pick you up and move you to the bed

"Have you eaten today?" he asked, holding your hand gently, "I didn't saw you go out from your office.."

You look away, not wanting to face him, this made him more greedy for answers. "Is your work stressing you out? If yes, I can help you reduce it."

It sounds great actually, "..a bit.." you looked at him, smiling a bit, "and no.. I haven't eaten anything.." you looked at his hand that was holding yours

He wasn't surprised actually, and you also know that, "What would you like to eat?" he asked, you fall silent again, thinking deeply before then shaking your head, which made him frown

"Sorry.. it's just that every food that comes to my mind doesn't sound good, it makes my stomach uncomfortable.." you answered, "although yes.. I am hungry.."

Rubbing your hand again, he sighed, "How about I'll make you some soup?" it sounds a bit odd since he doesn't prefer eating it, but for you right now, he'll do it. You nodded

"Be right back." he kissed your hand before leaving the room

Although the smell of food that he was making was good, your stomach didn't agree, it churns a bit.. making you curled up again

It took a bit to calm it down, just in time when Alhaitham comes in

"Here.." he sat beside you, gently feeds you the soup, making sure it's not too hot

It hurts him to see you slightly frowned uncomfortably whilst holding your stomach at some of the bites..

Especially when he felt that you were a bit lighter when he picked you up.. :(

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#genshin impact #genshin fluff #genshin impact headcanons #genshin boys #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact fluff #genshin zhongli #genshin kazuha #alhaitham #zhongli #kaedehara kazuha #fluff #zhongli x reader #kazuha #al haitham fluff #haitham

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itsbeeble · 2 years ago

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Bittersweet (pt 2 of Sour)

Summary: After the unintentional reveal of Mingi’s intentions toward you, everything about him feels bittersweet.

Genre: Angst

WC: ~2.4k

Pairing: song mingi x afab!reader

Warnings: none really. A lot of angst, Wooyoung doing damage control (kinda), a single sex joke I think

ALL PARTS: pt 1: Sour | pt 2: Bittersweet | pt 3: Tangy | true ending | alt ending

Monday rolls around too fast, the rest of your weekend spent holed away in your dorm room. Your roommate, Ryujin, did her best to comfort you, to keep people out. To keep them out. You had let your phone die the night of the party, ignoring the hundreds of texts and calls you’d received that same night. When you’d finally plugged it in Sunday morning, you made it a point to block each of their numbers. All eight of them.

You don’t go to your first class, the one you share with Jongho. You don’t go to the one after that, the one you share with Mingi, San, Wooyoung, and Yeosang. Nor do you go to the one you share with Seonghwa, Yunho, and Hongjoong. You stay in your dorm room, curled up under your blankets with the curtains shut and the lights off. You let the silence be your comfort for the time being, at least until Ryujin comes back with your dinner.

There’s a knock at your door. One, two, three slow knocks. You know it isn’t Ryujin. She has a key and she would just come in without warning. That leaves only a handful of people, none of which you want to see.

“Y/N,” Wooyoung’s voice is quiet and muffled, much unlike his usual tone. You’re almost surprised he was the first to try to speak to you. “Can you open the door?” You pull your blanket further over your head, squeezing your eyes shut. “I’m— we’re sorry. We’re really sorry. Just…just please talk to us? Talk to me at least?” Your heart begins to pound, a lump forming in your throat. He sounds…sad. He’s been sad, of course, but he’s never sounded sad. Always trying to make other people laugh before receiving comfort. But now…there’s nothing for the two of you to laugh about. He could laugh at you, of course. You’ve been the victim of their sick joke for three years now, and you had no idea.

“Y/N, I just…I want you to know that he never intended to hurt you like this. I know that…I know that it doesn’t seem like it, and I know it doesn’t make sense, but he really cares about you. He always has. This was never a game to him. You were never a game to him.”

You wonder if he’s lying to you. Wonder if he’s just trying to win back your trust, try to get you to open the door only to laugh right in your face and make a joke out of you once more.

There’s silence now, and you assume he left, giving up on you. You feel the tears on your cheeks now, feel them sliding across your cheek, to your nose and onto your pillow. You bring your sleeve-covered hand to your mouth and bite down, muffling your sobs as best you can.

You knew it would hurt more after the fact.

You just didn’t know it would hit you like a tidal wave.

“Hey,” Ryujin shoves your shoulder, jolting you from sleep. The smell of fried chicken wafts through the air, reaching your nose and forcing you to peek your eyes open. She’s frowning down at you, a plastic bag of takeout in her hand. “You hungry?”

“A little.” She hums and goes to sit on her bed, unlacing her sneakers and kicking them onto the floor. You push yourself into a seated position, rubbing the sleep and the dried tears from your eyes. The lights are on now, creating a harsh glare that makes you squint.

“You think you’ll drop his shit off tomorrow?” Ryujin is looking at you now, her hands resting on the mattress beside her. “Like his sweatshirts, the trinkets, shit like that?” You shrug. “You’ll have to at some point.”

“I know.”

“Want me to go with you?”

“I don’t know.”

“Okay.” She passes you a box and a fork. “Eat up, think on it. If we don’t do it tomorrow, I’m free Thursday if you want someone with you.”

It’s hard to eat when you’re on the verge of tears. You realize this now, as well as the fact that food tastes bland when you’re crying. You keep your head down, choking down the tasteless food while the tears begin to fall and land on and in the box on your lap. The sniffing follows, and you try to force the sobs back but it begins to hurt.

Ryujin doesn’t say much. She sits across from you, listening to you and not trying to talk to you. You appreciate it. While receiving comfort is nice, it’s sometimes better to just have someone nearby.

Just the knowledge that she cares to stay is enough for you.

Tuesday is uneventful. You no longer have tears to cry, your eyes seemingly dried up and sick of you. You continue to lay in bed, moping. Wooyoung comes by again. This time he attempts small jokes, things you used to laugh at. Jongho getting yelled at by Hongjoong for spilling coffee on a canvas. Making fun of someone in your shared class for tripping on the shitty lecture hall stairs.

“It’s boring without you,” he says finally. “We aren’t laughing like we used to. Hongjoong is locking himself up in the studio more, coming out less. San is picking up more shifts at the cafe. Yeosang, too. Jongho spends more time at the gym. Yunho doesn’t cook, and when he does it tastes like shit.” He takes a breath after a second, and you listen carefully. “Seonghwa doesn’t clean anymore, which is funny considering he was always yelling at us about keeping our spaces clean. The house has essentially become one big trash pile.” You note how he doesn’t talk about himself, or about Mingi. You want to know why. You want to know why he is here and the one who started all this isn’t.

“You’re probably wondering why it’s me here, right? Why Mingi hasn’t come to try and talk to you?” There’s a thump against the door, you presume it’s him leaning his head against it. “If we were joking, I would tell you I got the short end of the stick this time around. Granted, it’s my fault this happened. If I hadn’t gotten myself fucked up in the first place, maybe you still wouldn’t have known. Maybe this whole thing wouldn’t have happened, maybe we could’ve forgotten the bet even existed or Mingi would’ve told you. So it’s my fault.”

It isn’t. You know it isn’t his fault. Yes, he had been part of it. Yes, he’d neglected to tell you a crucial part of why Mingi had approached you. But, at the end of the day, it’s Mingi’s fault. He didn’t have to take the bet. He could’ve refused. He could’ve told you outright.

Everything seems bittersweet. Every memory you have of college, from your first class with Mingi, to the day of the party. You can’t help but hate the things you once loved about him. His laugh, his gummy smile, the way he carried your things wherever the two of you went, the way he kissed you. All those things are so bitter in your mind.

The convenience store down the road from your campus once held so many good memories. The first time the two of you met, the little trips you’d make whenever one of you couldn’t sleep. Those sour candies used to taste so good to you, but now you can’t bring yourself to even look at the small blue bags.

Wednesday. You wake up to Ryujin’s alarm, and force yourself out of bed. You know you have to go to class today, know you’ll have to at some point or you’ll fall behind. You know you can’t do that, not when you’re so close to getting out of here.

There’s a knock at the door. Ryujin groans from where she still lays in bed, and you sigh knowing you’re gonna have to answer it.

And boy, do you regret doing that.

“Mingi,” you choke out. He blinks down at you, mouth partially open and eyes filled with disbelief. “What are you doing here?”

“I— I wanted to see you.” He stutters, hands clenching around the papers he’d been holding. “You weren’t in our— your classes yesterday so I wanted to bring you these.” He shoves the papers forward. Notes. Organized in the same way you’d done for him these past few years, little doodles and notes scattered across the slightly wrinkled pages. “I tried to— to keep them neat, like yours. I hope they’re okay.”

You don’t say anything for a few moments, just staring down at these notes. These stupid fucking notes that shouldn’t affect you like they are, that shouldn’t make you want to go crawling back to him like you want to.

“Thank you.” You say numbly, your voice trembling slightly but you blame it on the early morning fatigue. There’s a tiny spark of hope on his face, his eyes twinkling slightly. “Please leave now.”

And just like that, the hope he’d had for just a few moments is completely crushed.

Mingi knows it’s his fault. Knows he can’t blame you when you shut the door in his face. He should be happy you didn’t slam it the second you saw his face, and he’s forever grateful that you didn’t.

He pushes a few loose strands of his fiery hair out of his face, shoulders slumping forward while he makes his way to the exit of the building. The warm air of mid-September hits him hard, and his nose scrunches while he adjusts.

“Did you really think she was gonna forgive you?” Jongho stands to his left, leaning back against the brick wall of your dorm building.

“What are you doing here, Jongho?” The younger boy shrugs and pulls himself off the wall.

“Making sure you didn’t do anything stupid.” There’s a pause and Jongho corrects himself. “At least, not again.”

“I get it,” Mingi snaps. “I fucked up.”

“You did more than fuck up, Mingi. You ruined her.” Jongho’s eyes are narrowed, and Mingi has to take sharp breaths to keep himself from lashing out. “What do you think is gonna happen with her now? She doesn’t trust any of us, the people she considered to be her best friends up until Wooyoung told her what you did because you didn’t. She’s going to isolate herself, Mingi. She’s going to decide that she hates you, and then you’ll never be able to reverse the damage you did. The damage we all did.”

“What do you expect me to do, Jongho?” Mingi huffs and Jongho shrugs. Of course the younger boy would come here and bitch at him, but not offer a solution. He’s on his own this time. He has to fix this himself and he isn’t quite sure where to begin.

“Fix it. I don’t want to lose my best friend because you’re a fucking asshole.”

Surprisingly, you go a full week without any of them trying to talk to you in person. It’s a week of whispers and piteous looks. A week of judgement. A week of wanting to kill anyone and everyone around you except for Ryujin and her friends.

“How long do you think it’ll be before he tries to get the boys to apologize?” Ryujin stabs a fork into her cafeteria salad. You shrug, resting your head on the palm of your hand.

“I hope he doesn’t.” Yuna says bluntly, “he doesn’t deserve any type of forgiveness from you. I don’t care how good he fucked you while you were together.”

“Technically,” you say, “we weren’t together.”

“He never asked you to be his girlfriend?” Yeji’s jaw drops and you shake your head. “And you still held onto him for three years?”

It’s silly, thinking about it now. You’d been looking for something secure, and he’d given you that for a while, but it hadn’t been enough. You couldn’t claim him faithful to you, because you were never together. And yet…you tried to remain as faithful to him as possible. A part of you had hoped that he’d ask you to be his, to make it official. A part of you didn’t care for the labels, or the technicalities, or anything like that. You just wanted him to tell you that he was yours, and you were his. Just that would’ve been enough for you.

“Don’t give her a hard time,” Lia scolded. “You would’ve done the same thing.”

“Not for three years though,” Chaeryoung frowned. “At that point I would’ve asked him how serious he actually was, and whether he actually wanted to be with me or not.”

“I did, a few times.” You defend yourself. “And he always said that I was the only one he wanted.”

“But he never made it explicitly clear that you were together?” Lia scoffed. “Fucking loser. All of them, not just him.”

“I dunno…” You shrug again and run your tongue over your lower lip. “They were my friends, at one point or another. That much, I know.”

You’re watching them together. Watching them cram together at one table in the university’s dining hall. They aren’t boisterous as they usually are. They aren’t laughing and yelling and throwing things at each other. They sit quietly, hardly talking to each other. Every now and again, one of them will look in your direction for a brief moment and lock eyes with you, looking away immediately after.

But not Mingi.

He didn’t look at you even once.

You see the sour candy on the table in front of him, unopened and untouched. The blue bag seems to be mocking you, even from across the room. You look away before you feel the tears well up, returning to your table’s new conversation. A party on Friday, one that Ryujin is forcing all of you to go to.

You don’t see Mingi look up at you as soon as you look away, or the way Seonghwa has to stop him from getting up from the table and approaching you.

TAGS: @kpopnightingale @atinytinaa @vserenia @atinyreads @marsstarxhwa @babiestarrcandy

#itsbeeble #itsbeeble masterlist #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop angst #ateez #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #ateez mingi #song mingi #mingi x reader #song mingi x reader #ateez angst #ateez smut #kpop smut

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crystalninjaphoenix · 4 months ago

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Vault Visit

A JSE Fanfic

SepticHeroes AU: Part 33

First Part | Previous Part | Read on AO3 at CrystalNinjaPhoenix

I bet you guys are wondering what's happening with JJ. Or at least I hope you are, he's a main character after all fhdjksalh Anyway, after a while of not checking on him, here's a chapter that mostly takes place from his point of view! JJ, still stuck in the Vault, continues his routine as normal. Mostly spending time with his new friend, Soren. But this routine is interrupted by a visit. I wonder who it's from, and what he wants :3c Anyway yeah prepare for further emphasis on how much the League of Heroes actually sucks >:)c Enjoy!

===============

Another day, and JJ’s headache had gotten worse again. He didn’t want to get out of bed, but he knew it would be bad to miss role call, so he rolled himself out and walked down to the gathering. If everyone in this prison was suffering from similar symptoms, or even worse, it was no wonder they all seemed so zombie-like. He wasn’t even fully aware of his surroundings until breakfast time. At which point the thought of eating made him nauseous. If the food was spiked with neutrinalin, would the side effects go away if he didn’t eat?

Soren was eating with him, though he hadn’t said much when JJ had sat down. Maybe the side effects were hitting him hard today, too. He looked across the table and saw JJ’s hesitation to eat. “I know what you’re thinking,” he said.

Do you? JJ asked.

“You’re thinking you can avoid feeling like shit if you don’t eat the drugged food.”

JJ smiled slightly. So I’m guessing that’s something people have tried? And it hasn’t gone well, has it?

Soren shook his head. “The neut will leave your system in about a day, so it seems like a good idea in theory. But the side effects will linger for a bit afterwards. Dunno how long, exactly—a couple more days, at least. Maybe longer.”

Has anyone tried to avoid eating and then make an escape attempt? JJ asked.

“I’ve never seen it, and no one I know has, either.” Soren bit his lip, thinking. “But there are stories of people who have. It didn’t go well, I think. None of the attempts. I mean, why would they? At that point you’re hungry, thirsty, and still feeling sick. You’d be easily overpowered even if your abilities were working at full force.”

JJ sighed. Well good to know. Still... He poked at the food with his spoon. Unflavored oatmeal, oh joy. Maybe things will be better if I just skip a meal. At least, less worse.

“Hm. Well.” Soren screwed his face up in doubt.

What? Are the guards going to get angry if I don’t eat? JJ glances around the room at the guards standing at each entrance.

“Yeah, they are.”

...what? Jameson hadn’t expected that answer. Why? I’m not starting a riot by skipping breakfast.

“But you might be plotting an escape attempt,” Soren said. “Like I just mentioned. Trying to avoid the League’s best friend in the food so your powers will come back and you’ll break out. That’s not acceptable to them.”

Jameson blinked. Are you fucking kidding me. So—they’ll just force you to eat their spiked food?

Soren laughed and leaned forward. “Fucked, isn’t it? It depends who’s on duty. I figure they all have instructions to check plates, but some take it more seriously than others. And are more... forceful about it.” His expression became shadowed. Almost... haunted. “Don’t... tell any of them I... said this.”

Of course not, JJ promised. He looked down at the food on his plate. It didn’t look any more appealing than it did before. But he forced himself to scoop some up and eat. A lull in conversation followed as the two of them tried to eat breakfast.

“Honestly even if you managed to get away with it, you have those cuffs,” Soren muttered. “They really don’t want you to get out.”

JJ paused. He pulled down his sleeve a bit so he could look at the pow-sup bracelet there. Sometimes he was able to forget they were there at all. Sometimes he couldn’t stop thinking about them. They were always a constant presence, the inch-wide, centimeter-thick metal. I noticed you don’t have any, he said. Most people don’t.

“Yeah, they only put them on the ones they think are really dangerous,” Soren said. A small smile pulled at the corner of his mouth. “Or whoever they’re most afraid of.”

I know you said that if you’re on good behavior, they might move your cell to another floor, JJ recalled. To somewhere less secure. Is the same true for these? He shook his hands, indicating the bracelets. Jazz hands.

Soren laughed. “Jazz hands! Jazz hands indeed.” He sighed. “I don’t think they will. The security risk is partly about your personality, you know. The cuffs are just about your powers. Or at least, that’s how I see them.”

JJ nodded. He turned his hands around, looking at the bracelets... and that’s when he noticed something that he hadn’t before. Or rather, he noticed a lack of something. How... How were these supposed to come off? There wasn’t a keyhole. Or a number pad for a code. Or a space for a fingerprint or anything. He knew the League had advanced tech, but—there would still be some sort of indication, wouldn’t there?

“Jameson?” Soren blinked, seeing JJ’s eyes get wide and his face drain of color. “What’s wrong?”

JJ’s eyes flicked up to him. He tried to sign something, but his hands were shaking so much that it came out incomprehensible.

“I-I didn’t quite catch that.”

Jameson tried to steady himself. I... don’t think... these are supposed to... come off.

“Huh?” Soren took a moment to process what Jameson meant. “Wait—they can’t be removed?!”

JJ shook his head. Tears sprang to his eyes, brought by panic and spurred on by his headache. Maybe there was some way to get them off that he couldn’t figure out—maybe it would be fine! And besides he knew he’d probably never get out of here, right?! So why did it matter?! Why did it matter?!

“Jameson? C-calm down.” Soren reached across the table, putting a hand on Jameson’s trembling shoulder.

They could just turn the cuffs on at any moment. Even if he made it out of here, even if someone miraculously took care of that technopath, even if—oh my god, could he turn on the cuffs?! He couldn’t control all technology but—these were probably connected wirelessly to something to control them. Could he use that connection?! No no no—he’s been forced to do enough for that electronic voice, he didn’t want him to have another way to control him!

“Jameson, calm down!” Soren stood up, leaning across the table. “You’re hyperventilating.” He grabbed his shoulders firmly. “Breathe with me, alright?” he said gently, and took a deep breath in.

But Jameson couldn’t focus enough to follow his example. The cuffs wouldn’t just suppress his powers, would they?! That was bad enough! But they were also magnetic, they’d snap together, meaning he couldn’t use his hands. What if he was busy doing something important when they snapped together?! What if he was on a ladder or something and he ended up falling?! Well he’ll never have the chance to be on a ladder while in prison, but still! Oh what if the magnets stuck to nearby metal? The walls were metal! Would he be stuck in place by the arms if he got close enough?! And what about this pow-sup energy anyway? Did it have the same side effects if he was affected by it long enough?! What if it had worse side effects?! What if—

“Jameson! JJ!” Soren shouted.

JJ gasped and looked at him, eyes filled with tears. He couldn’t—he couldn’t get enough air—

“You’re starting to sink,” Soren said, firmly but not unkindly. “Sinking into anxiety. I don’t know what you’re thinking, but you need to try to pull yourself out.”

His hands were still shaking, but he tried to speak. I can’t.

“Do you want contact or not?” Soren asked. “Should I back up or get closer?”

Close, JJ said, hiccuping from the way he was hyperventilating.

Soren nodded. He raised a leg like he was going to try and climb over the table, but glanced at the guards and changed his mind. Instead he rushed around the end of the table and sat down on the bench next to JJ. “Are you okay with me putting an arm around you?” He asked. When JJ nodded, Soren did just that, wrapping an arm around Jameson’s shoulders and pulling him closer. “Breathe,” he whispered. “Focus on what’s really here. What you can see and touch.”

JJ nodded. He knew exercises to do during moments like this. He knew them, but it just felt like everything was crashing down on his head and he couldn’t think—

“You can hear my voice, can’t you?” Soren asked. “Listen to that. Listen to the way these words rise and fall. Remember to breathe. Try to control that. Breathe in while I count to seven. One, two, three—“ Jameson tried, but his controlled breathing fell apart quickly. “That’s okay. We’ll try again. One, two, three, fo—We’ll try again. One, two, three, four...”

After a while, JJ managed to get a hold of his breath. Enough that he didn’t feel like he was constantly out of breath, at least. Thank you, he signed shakily, vision still blurred with tears.

“Glad I could help.” Soren smiled warmly despite how tired he looked. “Now... what was the problem there? I know, it was that the cuffs don’t come off, but what specifically about that upset you? Was it that you were trapped?”

Jameson shook his head. I don’t know. I just... just... kept thinking about what if someone used them. Maybe I did feel trapped. I don’t know. Every so often as he signed he caught a glimpse of the metal cuffs flashing in the light.

“Well... yeah, that makes sense,” Soren said. “But... this is going to sound a bit harsh, but... there’s nothing we can do about that right now.” He heard JJ’s breath hitch. “That’s upsetting, I know. But we can’t get them off. There’s no way we can.”

Are you telling me to give up? JJ asked.

Soren shook his head. “No. I’m telling you to think about what you can do instead of worrying about what you can’t. If someone decides to turn on the cuffs, you can’t make them stop. You don’t have your powers.” Soren smiled again. “You can figure out how to deal with it when it happens. Your brain is trying to come up with solutions ahead of time, but all that’s making you do is feel afraid and worried. Take a step back.”

I don’t want to... JJ took a shuddering breath. I don’t want to be unprepared.

“Of course, but if you push yourself into a panic like that you’re not really being prepared,” Soren said. “You’re just... well, panicking. This is a bad situation, I’m not denying this. But if you freak out—if we freak out—then we can’t do anything, you know? We’re frozen, letting the fear control us. We’re already dealing with a lot, constant panic will just make everything worse.”

JJ didn’t say anything. He just thought about what Soren was saying. Then he nodded. I suppose you’re right... anxiety isn’t helpful here. He leaned farther against Soren, limp from all the energy he expended in his little freakout. Thank you.

“G-glad to help,” Soren said. His face... was it a little red? Seeing it made JJ feel his face get a bit hotter too.

I’ve had a question for a while, JJ said. Are we... allowed to visit each other’s cells?

“Well... it depends on who’s on guard,” Soren said slowly. “But in general, it’s easier to visit someone on your own floor, or a higher one. You’re... probably not going to be able to visit someone on a lower floor.”

JJ nodded understandingly. If you ever need anything, maybe you could try coming up to visit me, then? Or... if you just want to... want to try.

Soren inhaled sharply. “Yeah... maybe I’ll... I’ll try that. If it’s some of the nicer guards on duty.”

The two of them finished breakfast without saying much else.

===============

“Prisoner 3117.” Thump!

JJ started awake. He’d been dozing absentmindedly on the cot in his cell, trying to get some rest but not fully succeeding. He just kept passing in and out of consciousness, until there was a sudden loud sound nearby. He rolled over and looked towards the cell door. It was open. A man in the blue-and-black uniform of a prison guard stood there, two more guards visible behind him. Did one of them hit the wall or something?

“Stand up,” the guard in the doorway said.

What was happening? Did he sleep past roll call in his daze? JJ sat up, and his head immediately started pounding. He winced, pressing a hand to the spot where it hurt the most.

“Stand up,” the guard repeated.

He was going to, jeez. You’d think that the guards would be used to their prisoners acting listless. JJ pushed himself to his feet, swaying for a moment, then looked over at the guards.

“Come on.” The guard gestured for him to come over. “You have a visitor.”

A visitor? Who was it? He could only think that it was one of his friends. Schneep, maybe? But would Schneep risk coming to a League prison when he was, himself, a criminal? It was probably Jackie, actually. A possibility it was Chase. He couldn’t see Marvin getting anywhere close to the Vault, since he was so paranoid about his identity being discovered—paranoid for good reason, of course. Yeah, it was probably Jackie. That was the simplest explanation. Interrogating a villain seemed like something he’d have to do as a Hero.

He walked over to the cell door as he wondered this. The guard in the doorway stepped back, gesturing for JJ to walk ahead of him. JJ did so, and the two other guards stepped up on either side of him. They were ready to grab him if he tried anything, he could tell. Not that he was able to ‘try anything.’ He was exhausted. His attempted nap had made him more tired, ironically enough. Even if he got desperate, the guards would be able to easily overpower him. They wouldn’t even need to turn on the pow-sup bracelets on his wrists.

The guards guided him through a door he hadn’t been through since he arrived here. The heavily-guarded doorway into the set of long, winding hallways that would eventually lead to the prison’s entrance. He couldn’t clearly remember the way to the front, but that didn’t matter, did it? He wasn’t going to escape anytime soon, even though all the neutrinalin side effects were making this place a hell to live in. He couldn’t escape. He didn’t want to think what the robotic voice would do to Dahlia if he left against its wishes.

After a while of walking, they entered a room divided in half by glass. Or... it probably wasn’t actually glass. It was probably some sort of bulletproof plastic. A table sat right in the middle of the room, divided in half by the glass as well. JJ had seen this sort of setup in enough crime TV shows. He could figure out how it worked. Jackie would sit in the chair on the other side of the glass, while he sat in the one on this side, and they would talk. The shows usually had a phone system, but clearly it was different here.

“Sit.” One of the guards pushed him forward. JJ stumbled, but regained his balance and walked over to the chair. He didn’t fail to notice how the legs were bolted into the floor. “Lean back,” the guard said, walking over.

JJ did so. The guard pressed a button, there was a beep, and then a pair of metal cuffs appeared, holding JJ’s ankles to the chair. Another, larger one shot out from the back of the chair, wrapping around his waist, right at the bottom of his ribcage.

“Since you can’t talk, your hands are free for your... sign language,” the guard said. JJ couldn’t see his face, but he could practically hear the doubt in his voice. “Consider yourself lucky. The first sign of anything suspicious and we’ll rush right in.” He chuckled. “If he doesn’t put you in your place first.”

Jameson blinked, confused. Wait, was his visitor not one of his friends? Obviously, he couldn’t ask any clarifying questions. The guards were leaving, their backs to him, so they wouldn’t see his sign even if they knew BSL in the first place—which he doubted they did. So... all he could do was wait.

Luckily, he only had to wait a minute. A door on the other side of the glass opened up, and in walked—oh, so it was Jackie after all. What did the guard’s comment about the visitor ‘putting him in his place’ mean, then? Did the guard just assume Jackie would beat JJ up if he tried to escape? Well... clearly he didn’t know anything about Jackie. But it was telling that the guard assumed a Hero would do that. JJ just wasn’t sure what it, specifically, was ‘telling’ about.

Jackie paused soon after he walked into the room. Even with the white lenses of his mask, JJ could tell his eyes were locked on him. An expression of total shock on his face. Did he look that different since the last time Jackie saw him? Jackie looked exactly the same to him... didn’t he? Maybe... maybe his face was a bit narrower. Had he been eating enough?

After a moment, Jackie hurried over and sat down at the chair. JJ heard the scrape of its legs against the floor—so that one wasn’t bolted down. Of course it wasn’t. Jackie cleared his throat. “Um... can you hear me?” he asked.

JJ nodded. Jackie’s voice sounded a bit tinny. It was probably coming from an intercom.

“Right. Good.” Jackie cleared his throat. “I... wanted to... check on you. H-how are you doing?”

...how was he supposed to answer that?

After a moment of having his hands in the air, hovering awkwardly as he thought about what to say, JJ signed, As best as I can be, in this situation.

“Hah. Yeah... probably a dumb question.” Jackie nodded. “You, uh... you’re... eating alright? Do, uh... Does a place like this have somewhere you can get sunlight? Exercise?”

JJ nodded. There’s a courtyard. And there’s three meals a day. Not that he made much use of the exercise equipment out there. Not that he always ate everything on his plate.

“A courtyard?” Jackie blinked. “Well that’s good to hear. But what about people who can fly?”

There’s a net that covers the top of it. And besides, you know about the neutrinalin, don’t you?

“I, uh... yeah...” Jackie nodded slowly. “I knew that... prisons fed their superhuman prisoners neutrinalin. Um, but...” He hesitated, looking like he had something to say, but not sure how to say it. “You, um... look... You’re really pale, and...” He trailed off.

Jackie, JJ said. Did you... want to ask me something?

Jackie started in surprise. “Um, y-yeah. I... We know about the one who was blackmailing you. The police and everyone. It’s on the news and stuff.”

JJ started. So they found his emergency video tape after all. That was a last resort. He hadn’t even known if he would use it, not until Jackie had finally confronted him in the police station. God—did he know that JJ had recorded that video? JJ glanced around looking for video cameras in the room. There had to be one!

“How we figured it out is secret,” Jackie said hurriedly. “A League secret. But we know about Anti-Virus.”

JJ laughed. Anti-Virus?

“What?” Jackie sounded suddenly defensive.

It just... seems so... I don’t know, giving him a cheesy name like that... makes it sound less... serious.

“He called himself that!” Jackie said. “In your—” He suddenly stopped, coughing. “Well, the message did have a little ‘haha’ on the end, so maybe he thought it was funny too.”

Ah... JJ remembered that part in the texts now that Jackie mentioned it. He caught it on the video. So... now what happens? he asks. You know about him, so now what?

Jackie hesitated again. “The plan is to get you out of here,” he said slowly. “After all, you’re not fully at fault for this. At the very least, you don’t need to be so highly guarded. But... it will take... a long time to get through the trial and all that.”

JJ blinked. Jackie didn’t exactly sound optimistic. Huh... if he got moved out of the Vault legally, would that anger him? What would he do to Dahlia? He tried to hide his sudden spike of fear. Well... that’s good, he said slowly.

“So, um...” Jackie cleared his throat. “Is there... anything you want to share about him? This Anti-Virus?”

Well, that would certainly anger Anti-Virus, sharing information about him. Though to be honest, JJ didn’t know all that much in the first place. What do you already know about him? JJ asked.

“He’s a technopath,” Jackie said. “One with the ability to manipulate software. You probably aren’t aware of this, but uh... there was a data leak from the League database. Anti-Virus was behind it. He doesn’t want us to investigate him.”

Yeah, that made sense. I don’t know who he is, JJ said slowly. He only ever contacted me through text, calls, and emails. And he deleted those afterwards.

Jackie sighed. “Yeah, that’s what I was worried about. Did he ever mention anything that might... give away who he really is?”

JJ shook his head. He couldn’t recall Anti-Virus telling him anything related to himself. Even when JJ tried to egg him on a couple times, the voice remained firm and the text remained businesslike. Only relating back to Jameson. What he wanted Jameson to do, what he would do if Jameson didn’t obey. A single-track mind.

“Any little thing could help,” Jackie insisted. “Do you know why he wanted to attack SepTech, for example? On the roof that day, he said something about wanting to control it, but is that the truth? Or... was he just creating a Puppeteer character for you to play?”

Jameson stiffened. He shook his head again. I’m sorry, I don’t know anything.

“...right.” Jackie nodded. “Of course. I don’t expect he’d want to tell you anything. Especially if he thought you’d get arrested.” He sighed and leaned forward. “...how are you doing, JJ? Really? I mean... y-you’re still my friend. Strangely enough, you were still my friend even when I thought you were the Puppeteer on your own free will. That’s why I couldn’t... couldn’t understand why you’d do that. So... I-I want you to be okay. Even... even in a situation like this.”

JJ blinked. Thank you, he said, signing slowly. I’m... fine. Could be better, but fine.

“Good. Good.” Jackie nodded. “Nobody’s giving you any trouble or anything?”

No, not at all. I’d even say I made some... friends.

“Friends?” Jackie blinked. “With villains?”

Well, yes... if that’s who’s in the prison, then that’s who’s available for me to talk to. Other villains.

“JJ, you’re not a—”

JJ shook his head, interrupting him. Yes I am. No matter what my motivations, I still did those things.

“But you—You’re a good person,” Jackie insisted. “You know that, right?”

Jameson tried to smile, but it wavered. Thank you for thinking so.

“You are,” Jackie continued. “You can’t think that you’re not. You had a good reason for doing what you did—I-I’m sure. We all know it. Schneep does, Chase and Marvin do. We all know.”

So... they all knew about Dahlia, then? Well, of course they did; if Jackie found his message, he found hers too.And of course he’d tell the others. Jameson hadn’t told Jackie, Chase, or Marvin about her for so long... were they angry that he hid his sister from them? Jackie didn’t seem mad, but he wouldn’t know for sure unless he was direct about it. And he didn’t want to be direct. But he couldn’t help himself from thinking about what he would say if Jackie asked about why he never told them he had a sister. Ever since she was kidnapped, even thinking about her hurt, there was no way he could’ve brought her up to them... not to mention them knowing about Dahlia could have been trouble if his secret as the Puppeteer got out.

Did the rest of the world know about Timekeeper, too? Or did his friends keep that part to themselves?

“JJ?” Jackie prompted.

Jameson shook himself out of the introspective daze he’d slipped into. Sorry, he signed.

“It’s fine,” Jackie said. “So... really, people have been... friendly in here?”

Not friendly exactly, JJ said slowly. I’m sure a lot of them don’t like me. But no one has the energy to do much. And a couple have been nice. I met someone, Soren—

“Who?” Jackie asked.

S-O-R-E-N, JJ said, spelling it out. He’d forgotten for a moment that Jackie wouldn’t know the name sign he gave Soren. You know him.

“I do?” Jackie leaned back. JJ could see the gears turning in his mind. “Wait—you mean—Pathos?”

JJ nodded. He wanted to know what had happened back home, and things... developed from there.

“I—I—” Jackie seemed to be at a loss for words. He let out a breath. “O...kay, then. That’s... a hell of a coincidence.” He shook his head. “Well, uh... is he... okay? Besides all the... the crimes.”

Jameson chuckled. Besides all the crimes, he’s very okay. The same can be said for a lot of people in here.

“Hah. I’ll take your word for it.” Jackie sat there for a moment. He looked... sad. “Are you... sure there’s nothing you can tell me?”

...I’m sorry, JJ said.

“No, don’t be. In fact, thank you for what you’ve told me so far.” Jackie gave him a soft smile. “I... hate for this visit to be short, but I guess... there’s nothing more for us to talk about, for now. M-maybe I’ll be back if there are any... changes. Or if there’s anything else I want to ask.”

It hurt to see Jackie for a minute, only for him to leave again. But it wasn’t like they could spend ages catching up. JJ wouldn’t be surprised to hear that there was a time limit on visits. Goodbye, then, he said.

“Goodbye... for now.” Jackie stood up. “W-we’ll see each other again.” And with that, he turned and left.

JJ watched the door slide closed behind him. He sighed, slumping in his seat. And he wondered... would it have been better to never see Jackie at all? Would that be better than having this short conversation, reminding him of what he couldn’t have ever again? Reminding him of what existed outside the walls of Byrthon Vault?

The guards appeared to take him away again. He did not resist. No use in starting now.

===============

“Windstorm visited you?” Soren asked later that day. He was clearly surprised. “I guess... that might make sense? He doesn’t seem the type to throw someone in prison and forget. But what did he want with you?”

JJ sighed. There were a handful of others nearby. Soren had tried to introduce him to other prisoners JJ might get along with. But Soren was the only one who knew sign, so he was interpreting for the others. Don’t say this out loud, JJ said. But... we were friends.

Soren raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

Jameson nodded. We met in our secret identities first... then I found out about his, by accident. Then he found out about mine when he unmasked the Puppeteer. It has... been a lot.

“I see...” Soren nodded slowly. “That... must be... difficult. At least he spoke to you.”

He’s a kind man, really, JJ said.

“Hey, what’s this all about?” One of the others nearby was Angela, the one who got up in JJ’s face early on. She seemed a lot more... chill, now. And she was too tired to act on anything, even if she wasn’t. “It’s not every day a Hero comes to visit someone in the Vault. Is it... should we be worried?”

Soren looked at Jameson. After a moment, he shook his head. It was all stuff related to me, not any of you, he said. Nothing is going to change for the worse in here.

As Soren told the others about that, JJ leaned on his shoulder and closed his eyes. His head still hurt. He was having trouble even sitting upright. But absentmindedly, he did wonder why Jackie came to visit. To let him know that the outside world was aware of Anti-Virus? To give him hope that he’ll be able to get out of here? That was probably it. Even though Jackie asked him questions about Anti-Virus, he seemed less concerned with interrogating information out of him and more worried about JJ’s health and how he was doing.

That was nice. Jackie really was a kind man. But JJ knew that it was unlikely that the public or the justice system would so easily forgive the Puppeteer. He knew he wasn’t leaving prison. Maybe he’d leave the Vault eventually. But he doubted it.

There was nothing he could do to change that though, was there? So he shouldn’t get himself worked up. He should focus on what he could do. He could spend time with Soren, maybe get close to other prisoners. Try to keep in shape to stave off the side effects. That was about it.

Still, it was better than thinking about how he was trapped in here. So he decided to focus on those few things after all. It might make being stuck a bit more bearable.

===============

“This is the path to the visitor’s room, I’m pretty sure.” Jackie handed Schneep a torn-out notebook page with a crude pencil map on it. “I asked a lot of questions about where the other corridors went, not all of them were answered, but I labeled the ones that were. I didn’t want to be too persistent for an answer, just in case it was suspicious.”

Schneep looked over the page, studying it. The four of them were in Neun Park again, having left their phones at home. “I see, I see,” he muttered. “Did Jameson tell you anything?”

“He mentioned a courtyard,” Jackie recalled. “But that it was covered with a net. Honestly I could’ve maybe asked him more... like where his cell is or something. But I thought that’d be weird.”

“Well, what you said earlier about the layout should help, right?” Chase said. “The warden said the most dangerous ones were higher up, I think they’d count JJ as dangerous.”

“Strange that they do that,” Marvin muttered. “Kanchana told me there’d usually be separate wings for different securities, not different floors. There must be only one cell block. Or two, for men’s and women’s.”

“It’s not the biggest prison, I guess?” Jackie said. “I’ve been to one before, the Vault was definitely smaller than that, but it looked a lot more secure. Cameras everywhere.”

Chase frowned. “Do you think Anti-Virus is able to get into the Vault cameras, then?”

Jackie stiffened. “Well... h-he’d need a reason to. I guess he could be keeping an eye on Jameson... I hope he’s not, though.” Oh god, if Anti-Virus did know what was going on in the prison, did he spy on his visit with JJ? Did he hear everything Jackie said to him? ...He was pretty sure he didn’t say anything too obvious about the breakout. But still. It made him nervous, but it was all done now. There was nothing he could do, other than help with the breakout.

But not too much. He couldn’t know anything important. If the League got a hint of what he was planning, they’d probably detain him at least, and he wouldn’t be able to help anyone.

“Do you know anything else that could be of help?” Schneep asked.

Jackie nodded. “He had these cuffs on. The warden said they were magnetic pow-sup bracelets.”

“What? But they’re already using neutrinalin on him!” Marvin cried. “They put pow-sup cuffs on him, too?!”

“The warden explained all that actually,” Jackie said. “It’s in case the neutrinalin fails somehow. If he shows any sign of using his powers they turn on the pow-sup and the cuffs snap together. I think it’s because his powers are so hand-based. The strings come from there and stuff.”

“Oh, so the pow-sup isn’t active all the time.” Marvin relaxed slightly. “That’s... slightly better. But only slightly. I-I still don’t like that.”

Schneep frowned. “There must be a way to get those off. Do you think we could find the key? Oh, but no, something so secure would probably use something more advanced, wouldn’t it? Perhaps fingerprint recognition. So we must prepare for his wrists to snap together at any moment, and once he is out we need some way to take them off. I wonder what metal they are made out of...”

Marvin shrugged. “No way to know without looking at them, I guess. But it can’t be too difficult to break.” He held up a hand and wiggled his fingers. Small spheres of glowing red energy, each the size of ball bearings, appear around his fingers and weave around them in a repeating pattern.

Jackie nodded. “I do think you’d be able to break through them... you’ll just have to be careful. They are on his wrists, after all.”

“Of course,” Marvin said quietly. The spheres disappeared. “I don’t want to hurt him.”

“...yeah. I-I know you don’t.” Jackie looked to the side, watching a couple cars go down the street next to the park. “Are... are you guys going to do more planning? If so, I should probably go.”

“Right, yes.” Schneep cleared his throat. “Thank you very much, Jackie. This is a great help.”

“Is it?” Jackie asked. “I don’t think I managed to get much.”

“Anything is better than nothing.”

“Oh! Do you know exactly where the cameras are?” Chase asked. “Before you go, could you like... make a note of them?”

“Great idea, Chase!” Schneep nodded.

“I can try to remember where they are but, uh, don’t fully rely on my memory.” Jackie patted his pockets and took out the pencil he’d used to draw the rough map earlier. He took the paper back from Schneep and put a couple dots on it. “I think that’s where they are... the one right outside the front entrance had a red light and I watched for other ones like that. But there could be ones that don’t have those lights somewhere that I couldn’t see.”

“Hmm...” Marvin frowned. “I have an idea, but... I don’t know if I like it.”

“Don’t!” Jackie covered his ears.

“I wasn’t about to say it, fucking hell.”

Jackie stood up from the bench. “I’ll just go now. Is there anything else?”

“Not that I can think of,” Schneep said. “Chase, are you going as well?”

Chase glanced at Jackie. “Um... do you want me to go back with you?” he asked tentatively. “I-I’d be good with that.”

“Do you want to go home with me?” Jackie asked. “Or would you rather stay here and try to help.”

“I’m good with either, if you want me to come with you I will.”

Marvin rolled his eyes. “Is this how you two talk about most things? You’re flatmates, aren’t you? Do you go back and forth on doing the dishes, too?”

Jackie glared at him, then looked back at Chase. “Look, if you want to stay and help plan, you can. I can take the train back on my own, you know.”

Chase smiled weakly. “Y-yeah. I’ll stay for a bit longer. Let Frosty stretch his legs.” Frosty put his head on Chase’s leg, resting it there.

“Cool, man. I’ll see you when you get back.” Jackie smiled, then turned and walked down the street, heading towards the train station.

Once he was out of earshot, Schneep said, “The more I hear about the Vault, the less I know about how to infiltrate it.”

“You can’t just walk inside with your powers?” Chase asked.

“It is likely they will be prepared for supers with my skill set. I am not the only super who has ever had invisibility and intangibility.” Schneep chuckled. “Though I am by far the one with the strongest powers in a long time. They will have infrared cameras, I’m sure. And they may be prepared with energy weapons. Super intangibility usually cannot pass through energy beams and such. It is the same for me.”

“That’s how Jackie and I tried to corner him once,” Marvin said. “But you just went back into the U-Storit unit and walked through the wall there.” He sighed. “I should’ve completely surrounded you but I—”

“Didn’t think of it,” Schneep finished. “Most people do not. You are all accustomed to thinking of everything around as solid. Once you get rid of that mentality, so many new paths open up to you, ones that others do not consider.”

Marvin grinned. “I see.”

“Hey Marvin, what was that idea you mentioned earlier?” Chase asked. “That you didn’t like?”

Marvin’s smile dropped. He sighed. “I was wondering if the Dismantler could take out the cameras somehow. She’s a technopath—not like Anti-Virus, she doesn’t interact with the software, only the physical hardware of stuff. She... well, she can dismantle it. Physically. She also once told me that she has, like, a sense for high-tech stuff. She knows where nearby stuff is.”

“What, like an arrow in a video game that points to your objective?” Chase asked.

“Probably a bit like that, actually.” Marvin laughed.

“Well, why can’t she help, then?”

“Because... she’s... young,” Marvin said slowly.

Chase felt something in his stomach drop. “Is she a kid?!”

“Like an actual child?! No!” Marvin shook his head.

“O-oh. Good.” Chase let out a breath. Why did he suddenly feel a rush of panic, thinking about a child in danger? Well... everyone probably felt that way, actually. It’s not weird. Maybe it was a bit intense, but he worked with kids a lot... Why did he have this... strange feeling? Like he was... forgetting something...

“If we want her help for this, we’d have to get her into the Vault, a-and I don’t know how I’d feel about that,” Marvin stammered.

“Of course, of course.” Schneep nodded. “But... she was there at our first meeting. Does she want to help?”

Marvin shifted uncomfortably on the bench. “Let’s just look at Jackie’s diagram. See if there’s anything we can start to plan from it.”

Though they doubted Jackie’s little sketch was worth a long discussion, Chase and Schneep both nodded and turned their attention to it. Chase had a hard time concentrating, though. He kept thinking about that feeling... about that sudden panic. It seemed almost... protective in a way. But... it was probably just because he liked kids. Yeah. That was it.

And yet, the instinct nagged at the back of his brain. The feeling of forgetting something lingered all day.

#jacksepticeye #jacksepticeye fanfiction #jacksepticegos #septic egos #septic egos au #jacksepticeye au #jameson jackson #jackieboy man #marvin the magnificent #chase brody #dr schneeplestein #brigid writes fanfiction #septicheroesau

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dwobbitfromtheshire · 9 months ago

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From Hell to Home to Back Again

Summary: At the talent show, Chrissy Cunningham is so hungry that she nearly collapses. When she's found by Hopper, her parents ended up losing custody of her. She ends up being placed in the care of the Hendersons, and she finally finds the family she so desperately needed. She also ends up falling in love. What other changes are made in this alternate universe?

@emen-98 @1lostsoul0fishbowl @vulpixsworld

Prologue . . . Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chrissy didn't have to tell Eddie that she wanted some space. He just started distancing himself from her as well. Ronnie let it slip that it had probably had something to do with the fact that Higgins said something to him on Thursday after the fight, a fight that Chrissy had missed because she had been sick. Apparently, Jason and Tommy Hayes had been beating up Gareth for his lunch money, which was another cliche that Chrissy hated more than the rain. Eddie tried to stop them, but what he got was them knocking him around and him getting called to the principals' office while the actual assholes got away with it.

"What the hell did he say to him?" Chrissy asked.

They were leaning against Chrissy's locker that following Monday. Eddie had been nowhere in sight that morning.

"I don't know, but he probably somehow made it feel like it was all Eddie's fault. That asshole gets into Eddie's head, and despite what I tell him, it's hard to shake off," Ronnie said.

"He is an asshole," Chrissy frowned. "I wish there was something that I could do for Eddie."

"I don't think there's anything we can do except make sure Eddie knows that we're here for him and we're not going anywhere," Ronnie said. "If anyone can make him believe in himself, it's you."

God, Chrissy wanted to laugh. She leaned her head against the locker.

"I just told myself that I needed some time away from," Chrissy frowned.

"Hmm, maybe he could use some space too, to realize what he could lose," Ronnie said and paused, her face twisted as if there was something eating at her.

"What? Is there something else you're not telling me?" Chrissy asked.

"Well, the thing with Paige, the girl from the bar, is a lot more serious than we thought," Ronnie said.

"They're together?" She asked.

"I don't know, but he showed up at practice on Saturday with the girl, and apparently, she works at WR Records in Los Angeles. Eddie thinks she can sign us, but we need to record a demo to send in," Ronnie said with a sigh. "I have my doubts, though."

"Do you think she's leading him on?" Chrissy asked.

"I don't know, I don't think so. She's got stars in her eyes as much as Eddie does. I think they might both be using each other," she replied. "I think Higgins must have said something to make Eddie want to leave town. It's bad enough that people hate him because of his father. It's always been a sensitive topic for him."

Chrissy frowned at the thought of Eddie getting into trouble because he was trying to prove to people he wasn't what they said he was.

"Did you guys agree to making a demo?" Chrissy asked.

"Yeah, I don't know how we're going to get the money to record the demo, but Eddie says not to worry about it," She said. "Which is odd timing considering that his dad rolled back into town."

"His dad came back?" Chrissy asked.

"Yeah, Al is a notorious conman, which is probably why Officer Moore hates him so much," Ronnie said.

"Did he say where he was?" Chrissy asked.

"Eddie thinks he was in prison up in Joliet. I have no idea for what, though," she replied. "Dougie, Stan, and Jeff are excited about it. It all smells fishy to me, though, but I guess it's better to be there in case something goes wrong."

"You think Al has something up his sleeve?" Chrissy asked.

"Yeah, and I think he's definitely going to involve Eddie in his stupid scheme, but Eddie never could listen to me, his uncle, or anyone really when it came to his father except when he's being compared to Al," she said.

"Maybe there's a part of Eddie who wants to believe that Al cares about him and wants to be a part of his life," Chrissy said softly.

"Maybe," Ronnie said softly.

And as much as she had tried over the past weekend to put Eddie out of her mind, he was all she could think about. There was this pit in her stomach as she thought about what Eddie might do because he thought he needed to run away. How far was Eddie willing to go to escape? She wondered if she could go to Hop, but then she thought about what he could possibly do. It was all just speculation. There wasn't anything she could do either. It was his choice to make, but maybe she could, at least, try to talk some sense into him. When she arrived at the lunch table, it was void of Hellfire.

"Oh, yeah, they decided to remain at the Hellfire table indefinitely," Robin said.

"Which I don't understand, did we do something?" Steve asked.

"No, I think Higgins got into his head," Chrissy said.

"Asshole," Steve, Robin, and Nancy said.

"Where's Jonathan?" Chrissy asked.

"He said he wanted to spend the lunch period talking to Argyle," Steve said.

"And I told him you can't exactly eat a conversation," Robin said. "Which he didn't find very funny."

"No one did, Robin," Steve replied.

Robin glared at him before throwing a pretzel at him. He caught it in his mouth proudly, and then they started throwing pretzels in their mouths.

"Does this mean we're not going to the Hideout anymore?" Robin asked. "I mean, that would suck for Eddie, you know, since we're his friends and all."

"Just say you want to see Ronnie," Steve said.

"Am I that obvious?" Robin asked.

"Yes," Steve, Nancy, and Chrissy said.

"No need to say it in unison," Robin pouted.

The next evening, they all went to the Hideout. Eddie didn't even look at her, his eyes on Paige. Chrissy tried to get Eddie to talk to her after the set, but it was the other girl who drew her attention. Chrissy rolled her eyes as she slid into a booth with Ronnie, Robin, Steve, and Nancy. Ronnie was placing her corduroy ball cap on Robin's head, tucking a piece of hair behind Robin's ear.

"Looks cuter on you than it does on me," Ronnie said.

"Yeah?" Robin asked with a snort.

"Definitely," Ronnie said.

Robin blushed and looked down at the table. Chrissy forgot about her problem for a moment as she watched them flirt. She shared a look with Steve and Nancy. Of course, Eddie was still oblivious that his best friend was falling for a woman. Chrissy wondered if Ronnie even knew about herself. She did say she didn't think she would ever have a crush on anyone. Maybe she wasn't aware of her attraction toward women, but as Chrissy watched Ronnie gaze at Robin, maybe she was starting to realize it. She only hoped that Eddie would pull his head out of his own situation long enough to be there for his best friend.

The next day was another day without a sighting of Eddie, another day without him leaning against her locker. Chrissy was grumpy the entire day, and when her free period came, Chrissy went to the library again to sketch in her notebook again. She was scribbling furiously when she was yanked out of her chair. Chrissy nearly yelped until she saw that it was Ronnie. Chrissy quickly grabbed her stuff and let Ronnie pull her into one of the empty rooms in the library. She watched as the other girl paced before closing the blinds, and she invaded Chrissy's space, leaning over her. Suddenly, Chrissy was very aware that Ronnie was taller than her, reminding her that she was taller than both Eddie and Robin.

"How did you realize that you also liked women?" Ronnie asked in a hushed whisper.

"Well, I was having a conversation with my friend and her cousin when I realized that not everyone noticed men and women the way that I do," Chrissy said. "I mean, I had an inkling for a while, but I thought that I had to choose one or the other."

"I just - I never gave men a thought, I just assumed that meant I wasn't attracted to anyone, but maybe it's because I was ignoring my attraction to women," Ronnie said. "Am I a lesbian?"

"I don't know. Is that a word you feel suits you?" Chrissy asked softly.

"Yeah, it feels right," Ronnie said with tears in her eyes. "Why am I crying?"

"Because it can be pretty overwhelming when you come to terms with yourself," Chrissy said.

Ronnie hugged Chrissy tightly. She smiled as she pulled back.

"You're probably wondering - "

"Robin?" Chrissy asked with a teasing grin.

"Damn it. Was I that obvious?" Ronnie asked with a laugh.

"Yeah. Are you going to tell her?" Chrissy asked.

"Give me a chance to breathe, Henderson," Ronnie laughed. "But yeah, eventually."

Well, she couldn't figure out her own relationship. She could at least help someone else out with theirs. She still didn't see Eddie all day, and when she walked out onto the parking lot when school ended, she found Ronnie standing there staring as Eddie's van drove away. Chrissy walked over to her.

"He's not driving you home?" She asked.

"Nope, apparently, he's got somewhere he needs to be," Ronnie said.

"Something to do with his father?" Chrissy asked.

"More than likely," Ronnie replied.

"He's determined to make our hair go gray early, isn't he?" Chrissy asked.

"And fall out," Ronnie said.

"We have an extra seat since my brother will be biking home with his party," she said. "You want a ride?"

"Will Steve mind?" She asked.

"Let's ask," Chrissy grinned.

Of course, Steve couldn't say no to the girl his best friend was pining over. Ronnie slid in the middle seat, right next to Robin, while Chrissy slid in beside her.

"Hi," Ronnie said to Robin.

"Hi," Robin replied, her cheeks red.

"Hi."

"Hi!" Chrissy said cheerfully.

"I swear I know more words," Robin muttered and Ronnie laughed.

"Me too," Ronnie blushed.

The rest of the ride to Ronnie's trailer was quiet with Ronnie and Robin exchanging glances every so often. Once they arrived, Robin opened the door to get out but was stopped suddenly when Ronnie climbed over her, practically straddling her lap for a millisecond before getting out.

"I, uh, would have gotten out," Robin said as Chrissy handed Ronnie her things.

"I know," she said softly. "See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Robin said.

Ronnie closed the door, waved at Steve in thanks, and went inside. Steve drove away while Robin face planted onto the middle seat.

"Are you okay, Robin?" Steve laughed.

"My heart is beating so loudly. Can you guys hear it?" Robin asked, her voice muffled.

"No," Nancy giggled at her sister. "You've got it so bad."

"Shut it, Nance," Robin said.

"It's so cute," Chrissy giggled and poked Robin in the side.

She was happy for her friends' developing relationship, and she really tried hard not to feel sour about her slowly fading relationship with Eddie. It was hard when he wouldn't talk to her, and he would quickly leave whenever she tried to approach him. It was disheartening, to say the least. After trying all week, Chrissy finally gave up, hoping that Eddie would make the decision to come to her. Finally, it was the weekend, and Chrissy was over at the Wheelers. It was strange. In the past, it was usually just her and Nancy sprawled out on her bed with Barb occasionally joining them, but Robin joined them now. Nancy and Robin still fought like sisters do, but nowhere near as much as before. Not only were they sisters, they were now best friends.

"What's been going on with you and Eddie?" Robin asked. "I mean, it can't be because of whatever Higgins said."

"No, not just Higgins. His dad is also in town," Chrissy said. "Plus, I'm pretty sure Eddie is dating Paige."

"That cheater!" Robin gasped.

"Robin, we were never dating," Chrissy said.

"I mean, you and Eddie definitely have feelings for each other. Whether you guys admitted it or not, you guys were dating," Nancy said. "You had dinner at his house all the time, and sometimes that included his uncle. You danced together!"

"Well, if we didn't know we were dating, then we couldn't have known that we were exclusive," Chrissy said.

"Shit, that's true," Robin frowned. "Still, I'm calling him an idiot."

"Can we talk about something else?" Chrissy asked.

"Mike! We could talk about Mike. He's always doing something stupid," Robin said.

"What stupid thing has he done now?" Chrissy giggled.

"The little shit broke into my room, and then he had the audacity to get mad at me! Me! In my very own bedroom," Robin said.

"He's been very angry lately," Nancy said.

"Well, watching the first girl you like die to save your life probably doesn't help," Chrissy said and they all winced.

"Shit, why didn't I think about that?" Nancy asked.

"Because you've been dealing with Barb, and I've been dealing," Robin said.

"We kind of all been dealing with that, but still, as his older siblings, we should have done better," Nancy frowned.

"Maybe we can spend some time with him tomorrow," Robin said. "If he lets us."

"Well, just try not to push him too hard. He'll talk when he's ready," Chrissy said and frowned. "Dustin has been complaining about his attitude lately and that he hasn't been all that interested in playing D&D."

"Jesus, he must be in a really bad place," Robin frowned. "Should we go down there?"

"Well, they're playing right now, and I'm not looking forward to having my head chewed off by Mike for interrupting," Nancy said. "Tomorrow."

"Are you guys scared of your brother?" Chrissy asked with a giggle.

"No," Nancy and Robin scoffed.

Chrissy parted ways with them pretty soon after that. She said goodbye to Jonathan and Will on her way out before biking home with her own brother.

"The guys want to know when they can meet Eddie," Dustin said. "They think that I'm making him up and Hellfire."

"I don't know, he's been pretty busy since his dad came back," Chrissy said. "I don't know what he's even doing today."

"Did you guys have a fight?" Dustin asked.

"No," Chrissy said and then lied. "We're fine."

Chrissy kept telling herself that, all the way home. They were fine. They were going to be just fine. Chrissy wished she wasn't such a terrible liar.

Chapter Ten

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cuddlepilefics · 10 months ago

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Hi, it's me who wrote salembutnotthecat about writing a sickfic for The Rose fandom. So, my prompt is: Woosung getting carsick when going home after working the whole day recording a song in the studio. He decided to take a taxi to go home (Inspired by the actual situation when he got drank, took a taxi and had to stop it as soon as arriving on the Hannam Bridge. He got off and threw up everywhere.) but this time he gets sick not because of drinking but maybe he ate something wrong or got a fever. He gets too exhausted to drive so he takes a taxi instead... I just have this idea but you can alter the details in any way that is comfortable for you to write! If you haven't listened to The Rose yet, please give them a listen. They're amazing! Thank you so much. :)

Hannam Bridge

Prompts: Motion sick + professionalism failure + visibly ill + totally drained @monthofsick

TW: emeto, real person fiction

I have listened to The Rose and so far, my favorite song is "Sorry", "Red" following close on #2

Fandom: The Rose

Sickie: Woosung

No one’s POV.:

Woosung had already been exhausted when his alarm went off that morning. It felt like he hadn’t slept a wink but he knew that he had a full day ahead of him and couldn’t afford to roll over once more. His head throbbed when he set up, making him wince. Maybe a nice, hot morning coffee would ease his headache though it might not be the best idea to have one, considering he had to record a new song today. Woosung didn’t really feel hungry for breakfast, so he only got himself a cup of coffee, sleepily sipping the hot drink as he read over the lyrics on his phone. Before heading out, he knocked back a painkiller to soothe his headache, knowing he wasn’t supposed to take it on an empty stomach but he couldn’t bring himself to eat anything.

It was a decision, Woosung soon came to regret. His stomach was in knots but at least, the headache had improved a little. He’d spent the next few hours practicing the song and record it after lunch, so he could still hope his stomach would settle down till then because right now, there was no way the microphone wouldn’t pick up the rumbles. The other members all had their individual schedules today, which was usually fine but right now, Woosung wished he wouldn’t be alone but that couldn’t be helped. At least, Dojoon had texted, asking if they wanted to grab lunch together, since they both had their breaks scheduled at the same time. Woosung couldn’t imagine forcing any food into his stomach but maybe that was exactly what he needed to do to help it settle if the problem was coffee and medicine on an empty stomach.

By the time lunchtime rolled around, Woosung felt defeated. He didn’t like the way his voice sounded on the new song and didn’t know how he was going to record it later but decided that was a problem for his future-self to figure out. Dojoon frowned when the other plopped into the seat opposite him. “You good?”, he asked the leader, who tiredly rested his aching head in his hands. Woosung nodded but admitted: “Tired as hell and I have a headache.” – “Mhm, you’re pretty pale”, Dojoon commented. In his opinion, his friend looked visibly sick but he didn’t want to call him out. “Drank some coffee and had some pain meds this morning on an empty stomach, so it’s been a little unsettled all morning”, the older sighed, his stomach growling as if in confirmation, “I’ll just order some plain rice to calm it down and repent for my coffee-sin.” That made Dojoon laugh and although he felt so unwell, Woosung was glad he had gone out for lunch.

The rice had done little to settled the singer’s stomach, sitting heavily as he made his way to the studio. After getting set up, Woosung put on his headphones and winced at the pressure they applied on his head. Had the booth always been this stuffy? No matter how uncomfortable it was, he reminded himself to act professional and tried his hardest to do well as they started to record but it was hard. Every inhalation threatened to make his stomach cramp up and with his shallow breathing, his voice came out flat and forced. “Stop straining, your voice sounds forced”, came the producers voice over the speaker. Woosung nodded and gave a thumbs-up to show he had understood the instructions. That didn’t mean he’d manage to change anything about it though.

Somehow, today didn’t seem to be his day, Woosung acknowledged when the producer asked what was up because he usually did so much better. They agreed to take a five minute break during which he sipped some water and tried to quieten his racing mind screaming at him to be more professional. His hands trembled when he got behind the mic once again, the pressure mounting to do better. Woosung started to sweat but he didn’t know whether it was the stress or the lack of ventilation in the recording booth, that was already making him feel a little lightheaded.

Hours later, Woosung was finally done. No, he wasn’t satisfied at all with the way it had turned out but his throat hurt and his head throbbed, so he knew it wouldn’t get any better if they kept at it longer. Besides, he felt guilty for how long he was keeping the producer just because he couldn’t get his lines right. He had completely failed at being professional. The producer didn’t seem to be all that upset though, far more understanding than Woosung would’ve expected. While he packed up his belongings, the other even went to get him some tea from the break room, telling him to get home safely.

Too tired to drive himself home, Woosung called for a taxi and sat outside, sipping his tea. Getting some fresh air seemed to help temporarily and he weakly collapsed into the backseat, voice scratchy as he told the driver the address. If Woosung had felt like the recording booth had been stuffy, the car was a wholly different level. Within only a couple of minutes, he was sweating buckets, his stomach churning with every turn of the road. Of course, getting carsick would be the cherry on top of his already shitty day. Dreading the weird, fluttery feeling in his stomach, Woosung clutched his empty paper cup. He hoped he’d make it home without getting sick to his stomach, his throat already sore from singing all day.

They had just pulled onto Hannam bridge when Woosung’s stomach took a turn for the worse and he begged the driver to pull over, already gagging over the paper cup in his hand. For a moment, he got caught in his seatbelt as he tried to get out of the taxi but managed to free himself before pitching forward, the tea he had just finished splattering onto the pavement. Stumbling to the side of the bridge, Woosung clutched the railing and tried to brace himself against the dizziness. The next heave had him bent at the waist, acid burning his throat. His heart was racing as he retched up another bitter wave and struggled to inhale afterwards, his stomach immediately lurching again.

Woosung was glad that his hood had slipped forward over the upper half of his face when he had first bent over. Hopefully it’d conceal his identity because the thought of fans recognizing and watching him in such a pitiful state was enough to make his stomach turn. On the list of things he had hoped to never have to experience, getting sick in public was pretty far up. At least, it was already dark, so he could convince himself of his anonymity. That was the only comfort he found as his throat strained with dry heaves, body too exhausted to get anything else up.

Even when the heaves slowly tapered off, Woosung couldn’t bring himself to let go of the hand rail, his head spinning as his heart kept beating out of his chest. It was hard to imagine getting back into the stuffy taxi but he knew he didn’t really have a choice, since he didn’t want to waste the driver’s time and also because he truly wanted to curl up in his bed and be miserable in the privacy of his room. Staggering back to the taxi, Woosung gulped and forced in a shaky breath.

When he plopped back into his seat, he found a plastic bag and a bottle of water there, the driver sympathetically offering him a mint, which he gladly accepted, the taste on his tongue keeping the nausea at an all time high. Woosung dropped his head in his hands, totally drained. He could feel his blood pulsing in his head and it was only now, that he noticed how his cheeks had become damp with tears. His flushed cheeks felt hot against his hands and by now, he was pretty certain that he was running a temperature. There was no way his day could go so wrong if he wasn’t sick.

Woosung didn’t have the energy to check though, already glad that he managed to drag himself from the taxi to the safety of his own bathroom, where he promptly found himself retching up a mouthful of bile from the exertion of having to get upstairs. Merely rinsing his mouth and using some mouthwash, Woosung splashed some cold water on his feverishly flushed skin before stumbling to his room and crashing on his bed. In his haze, he only just remembered typing a message to their manager. The words barely coherent and with lots of typos, it was obvious how miserable he felt, already falling asleep with his phone in his hand as soon as he had hit sent.

#fanfic #fanfiction #sickfic #sick #emeto #tw emeto #tw rpf #novemetober #the rose

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bellysoupset · 1 year ago

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"I'm not hungry," Lucas mumbled, as he slid in the backseat of the car that had been sent for them and Bella frowned.

She felt incredibly out of her depth. She could do caretaking, but she had no idea how to do emotional caretaking. Her family's unspoken policy with emotional troubles had always been "nothing a couple beers couldn't fix".

Luke was doing his best to show he was somewhat collected, but at least with her he wasn't bothering pretending and Bell was glad for that, she was happy he trusted her entirely... She just had no idea of how to fix it.

"I didn't ask if you were," she wrinkled her nose, pushing the bagel towards his mouth, "eat up."

Lucas groaned, but took the bagel, starting to tear it apart in his hands and force little, pathetic bites in his mouth. Bella looked up, catching the chauffeur glancing at them, but he quickly averted his gaze.

This was the salt in the wound, the fact that her husband was falling apart and yet here they were, in this farse, playing happy house with Kit Howard. Where there were drivers and Lucas felt the need to flash bright, horrible smiles whenever someone talked directly with him.

She watched from the corner of her eye as Luke gave up halfway through the bagel and instead just curled up against the door, staring at the changing scenario. They were supposed to have gotten there in the morning, but an emergency cuddle session had been needed, so they exchanged the tickets. It was amazing what the black card with A T W O O D stamped on it could get, Bella thought sourly, sliding closer to him.

"Hey, look at me," Bell cupped Luke's cheek and pressed her lips into a thin smile when she noticed his sad stare. He swallowed in, forcing up a tiny smile.

"I'm okay, Bell-"

"Don't," she shook her head, "don't lie to me. To everyone else, but not to me, okay?" she stroked his cheek, "let's make a decent holiday out of this, Luke. I know being here was the last thing we wanted and I know the timing isn't exactly good and that you're not feeling well, but... We can make a good thing out of a bad one, right?"

He nodded slowly, "at least we're not at Vince's," Lucas whispered, bitterly and Bella opened a surprised smile. She giggled, bumping her nose against his.

"Yeah, it would be hella awkward when I clawed his face off mid Christmas dinner."

"You'd never, you fucking love him," Luke rolled his eyes and Bella grinned at the playful tone, however weak it was.

"Oh, trust me, I can love the guy and still claw his fucking face off. Try me," she pressed a kiss over his lips, then pulled back and grabbed the ditched bagel on his lap, "finish it up."

"I'm full..."

"That's all you've had to eat today," Bella glared at him, "you're not full, babe. Now eat."

It was another twenty minutes as they entered his gated community and then Bella felt her stomach drop to her feet. Luke had prepared her for it. He had shown her pictures, a fucking Architecture Digest tour of his house - Kit grinning with those overly white smile of his -, but nothing could've prepared her for the sheer enormity of it all.

"God... This is sick," she whispered, gluing her nose to the car window and watching the mansion grow as it came closer. She tried to imagine Lucas, a little version of him, in that house, but couldn't. In fact, Bell couldn't imagine anyone living there, period.

"Your dad lives here all by himself?" she whispered, half amazed, half horrified and Luke shrugged.

"He's rarely home, he's always touring," he leaned closer, pressing a kiss to her shoulder, "some things don't change."

"So back then... It was just you and your mom...?" which someone made things worse, not better. One adult and a child in that haunted fucking mansion. It was a wonder that Luke was so well adjusted.

"Yeah," he pressed a kiss to her cheek, "and the staff."

"The staff," she wrinkled her nose. She was the staff, Bella knew it quite well. Her mother would be the staff, Bella herself, in another reality, "they don't count?" she raised her eyebrows, voice all bitter and Luke shook his head.

"Of course they do, I used to spend more time with them than with my own mother," he sighed, "dad fired everyone when she passed though, I don't know the new people well enough."

Reason number a hundred why Bella hated Kit Howard, she thought, squeezing Luke's hand as the car finally came to a stop.

She expected Kit to come out to greet them, but instead it was a chubby lady, with a friendly smile on and curly very blonde hair. She was a short little woman, half of Bell's size.

"Oh hi...?"

"Bella, this is Mary Ann," Lucas introduced them, "she runs everyone and everything in this house, dad included. Mary this Bella, my wife."

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Atwood."

Bella cringed, "nice to meet you too, but it's just Bella," she shook the woman's hand, then looked around awkwardly.

"Mr. Howard is in the studio," Mary said, to Luke, who let out a little sigh.

"Of course," he wrapped an arm around Bella's shoulders, "c'mon, let me show you around."

She half wished he hadn't shown her around. The house was a fucking mausoleum, as far as Bell was concerned. Unlike the Sicily house, that only had one picture of Veronica, this one was filled with them. Every wall Bella looked at, there was Luke's mom plastered, with a fake smile on.

It was no wonder he didn't visit, she thought, avoiding Veronica's judgy eyes and trying to make any sense of the floorplan. Not even halfway through, though, she gave up. The place was a maze.

"And here's my old room," he finished up the tour, falling backwards on the gigantic bed and Bella stopped at the door, looking around. There was only one picture of his mom, sitting on the fireplace mantle. Veronica, glaring at the camera, one blurry hand out trying to block it.

Bella felt like she could almost hear the woman's exasperated "Lucas!"

Besides that, there were books. So many books, shelves littering the walls. Two posters with football players she didn't recognize, a deep blue wall behind his bed, an abandoned PS4 console under the flat screen TV, one framed shirt that was signed.

"So?"

"Not messy enough to be yours," she said, then crossed the room to stand in front of him, "I'm surprised that I like it."

Luke wrapped his arms around her, leaning to rest his cheek on her chest, looking around, "it's not bad."

"Yeah, I was imagining something more... Kardashian," she teased him and could feel him grimace and scoff against her.

"Don't say that around dad unless you want a whole rant," he whispered, "c'mon, let's go say hi."

"...Your dad isn't home," she pulled back, "he's in the studio, you heard Mary."

"That's the basement level," Lucas stood up, running a hand through his hair and forcing a smile, "let me show you."

--------------------

"Has Luke shown you the tapes yet?" Kit asked, lazily sprawled on his big chair, while Lucas sat in front of him and Bella dug through a box filled with old vinyl's.

She hated that they had so many good ones.

"The tapes?" She said, at the same time Luke whined:

"Dad, noooo-"

"Oh yeah, the tapes," Kit sounded so smug, getting up and opening a big black cabinet across the studio. Bella turned her body so she could get a better view and noticed there were multiple black folders, with white labels, stacked side by side. At least twenty filling up the whole cabinet.

Kit grabbed the 5th one, unzipped it and then flipped through the pages where white CDs with black markings were slotted in. Bella raised her eyebrows, shocked by the sheer amount of music.

"Here," the older man slid a CD out, then fed it to his sound system, folding his hands behind his back, while Luke let out a groan.

The song was mellow, with just an acoustic guitar and a drummer far in the background. Bella frowned, looking at Lucas all puzzled, only to widen her eyes as the first lyrics started and a very familiar voice sung it.

Luke, except his voice wasn't as deep, much breathier.

"Is that you!?"

"He recorded it all on his own," Kit sounded so proud, "his mother wouldn't let me include it in the album, though, and Lucas refuses to let me release it now."

"It's embarrassing," Luke's face was all red, "I was thirteen."

"Can I get a copy of that?" Bella asked, smiling so much her cheeks hurt, "has Jonah heard it before?"

"NO," Lucas glared at her, and she wasn't sure which question he was answering, probably both.

"I'll get a copy done for you, Bella," Kit smiled at her and Bella felt her disdain for the man fade just a little bit. Not much, just a tad.

#okay this is NOT a sickfic #its just context i think its necessary for the rest of christmas #and i dont wanna waste time in an actual sickfic writing it #no ending just Thoughts #lucas atwood #isabella martinez #mywriting

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evan4ever · 2 years ago

Note

can i request you to evan peters any character(or himself doesnt matter)x female has eating disorder he’s helping her like you know

I’m Here

Warnings: please please read with caution!!! This may be very triggering. ED (anorexia). Please reach out if you need help, there are resources and I promise you’re not alone 🤍

a/n: I contemplated writing this for awhile because it’s a deep and hard topic, but I’m hoping I wrote this in a way for anyone who struggles with this to know that there is help and people care. I’m linking an ED hotline, called NEDA. You can always message me if you need someone to talk to. Please don’t go through this alone 🙏🏻

I’m having this take place after you and Kit are released from Briarcliff

—

It’s been weeks. Weeks since you touched your favorite food. Weeks since you’ve ate more than a single bite of any meal before you. Weeks since you haven’t felt sick.

When you and Kit had finally been let out of Briarcliff, things were finally good. Having formed a relationship with Kit all that time together in that place, it wasn’t a surprise that he had asked you to come home with him, to be with him forever. Neither of you could imagine being apart after surviving for your lives together. So, of course you happily accepted.

You moved into his home, you spent months fixing it up, he went back to his job as a mechanic and you got yourself a job at a local diner. You were happy, Kit was happy. It was a picture perfect story and you swore nothing would make you feel anything like you did in Briarcliff. How could it? That place was hell and now you were free and living peacefully with the love of your life.

But with all the happiness you felt came an increase in your weight. Kit’s too, but that never bothered you. You loved it, in fact. He looked healthy and you fed him good, which he loved. But your own weight gain was a problem for you.

It didn’t matter that you were gaining because you were in a healthy and happy relationship. All you could focus on was that the number was increasing. It didn’t help that being nearly starved in the asylum had obviously made you drop an unhealthy amount of weight. You looked sick then, but standing that day in front of the mirror and observing your new curves, your stomach pouch and larger arms — something snapped in you. You hated the way you looked and you wanted nothing more than to look like you had the day you left Briarcliff.

So, you stopped eating.

Of course you didn’t want Kit to notice your lack of food intake, so you managed to take a bite or two of supper when he’d come home from work and stir around the food on your plate managing to make it look emptier than when you or Kit made it. And anytime he happened to question anything, you told him you had ate quite a bit at breakfast or lunch and you weren’t very hungry. You always reassured him. And he always bought it.

Your interest in food slowly dissipated. You had no desire to eat anything at all. Though the nausea from an empty stomach hurt quite a bit, your own mind didn’t let it win the battle. At some point, it became painful to eat a bite at all, like you had finally trained your stomach to hate food as much as your mind did. It was a sick and painful battle, but the way your body started slimming out and the number on the scale began dropping faster and faster was exhilarating.

Your goal was to hit the weight you had been when you left Briarcliff, but once you hit that number — you still weren’t satisfied. You wanted to lose more. So instead of allowing yourself to begin eating more, a healthier amount, you didn’t. You continued not eating and the number continued dropping.

You were sure Kit had no idea. He never commented on your weight, when you were larger and even now at a smaller size. You truly expected him to notice and to love it. Boys loved skinny girls. So why wasn’t he complimenting your weight loss? By this point, it was more than noticeable. Even your coworkers were impressed and had told you that you looked amazing. But never Kit. He always complicated other things about you, how your hair looked, your sparkling eyes, the way you looked nice, but never the size of your body.

Little did you know, though, that Kit had taken notice. It began on one of his days off where he realized you hadn’t stem anything all day, and by supper time you gave him the same comment you always had — that you ate too much throughout the day, you just weren’t that hungry. He quickly caught on to what was happening, how your body wasn’t only slimming out but wearing away. When he’s hold you at night, it was nothing for his arm to wrap around you twice if it could. Your ribs and your hip bones were poking out so far that it was worrisome. Your skin began paling and your hair brittling. He noticed all of it.

Your energy was gone at this point. It took everything for you to do your daily tasks, it pained you to get out of bed. If you could lay forever, you would.

It was getting bad. You had lost control and you didn’t even mean to. Of course you weren’t intending to become sick and frail, but your mind took over and would not allow you to become healthy again. Eventually, you believed Kit just didn’t care. There was no way he couldn’t see that you were sick, yet he never said anything. It spines you further that the man you love couldn’t see that you made yourself skinny so that you’d be more attractive, so much so that your life was slipping from you slowly.

Today was Kit’s day off. You stayed in bed when he got up, pulling the comforter up under your chin and wrapping yourself in it because you were so cold. You heard Kit moving around in the living room and kitchen but didn’t care enough to even wonder what it was that he was doing. All you wanted to do was disappear into thin air.

“Baby?” You heard his voice as he entered the room, looking over the thick blanket at him. You gave him a smile as he walked to your side and sat next to you.

“Good morning babe” you hummed quietly, trying to seem okay even though you knew you weren’t. He gazed down at you and you realized it was a look of concern that was on his face. He wore a small smile, but his eyebrows were pushed together and his eyes looked sad. “What’s wrong?”

He blinked a few times before looking down at his hands, you eyes flickering down to them too and noticing the muffin he held in them. You sucked in a sharp breath before looking back up to him confused. He let out a sigh, his eyes still on the muffin.

“Will you eat this for me? It’s blueberry.. your favorite.” He spoke quietly, almost scared to have asked. You clenched your jaw and pushed your own eyebrows together as a silent battle went on in your head. He was right, blueberry was your favorite. An blueberry muffins were expensive, so you guys didn’t buy them often. And now, here was Kit, holding one for you.

You wanted to accept his request, you wanted to shove the whole muffin in your mouth and melt into the sweetness of it. But your mind said absolutely not.

“Mm babe..” you hummed again, resting your head back on the pillow and closing your eyes and you shot him a smile, “I’m not hungry yet. I’ve only barely woken up. I will later?” Your eyes opened to meet his that held even more sadness. Your stomach turned when he seemed unhappy with your answers. He never pushed further when you declined food before, so why was he now?

You watched as he set the muffin on the nightstand next to you, his hands falling back in his lap as they clasped together and he stared down at them. You sat in silence wondering what was going on, fixated on his unreadable stance.

“I think we need to take you to the hospital.” He stated so quietly you questioned if you heard him correctly. Blinking a few times, you sat yourself up in the bed quick to pull the covers up to hide your bones that showed. You were nervous now at his sudden change in behavior today and the thought of going to the hospital made your pulse speed up.

“What?” You laughed nervously, shaking your head as if you didn’t understand. “Why would I need to go to the hospital?”

Kit still hasn’t met your eyes while yours were placed on him firmly. Your nerves grew with every passing second.

“You’re sick, y/n.” He said, sucking in a noticeably shaky breath. Your confusion and worry increased with his seemingly sadness.

“I’m not.” You disagreed, shaking your head. A deeper sigh left from his mouth and his shoulders slumped more than they were before, your eyes noticing the repeated clench and unclench of his jaw bone. “Kit..”

“We can get you help. There’s people out there that want to help you. I want to help you.” He spoke his last sentence in a whisper, a tear dropping onto his cheek. Seeing it pulled at your heart, realizing that he knew what was going on and was scared for you. “If we don’t get you help, your heart is going to give out. You can’t continue down this path and…” he sucked in another sharp, shaky breath, “and I can’t live without you.”

His eyes finally flickered at you, more tears dripping from his eyes to his beet red cheeks. His eyes begged you, pleaded with you to hear him out. You, at a loss for words, only stared at the broken man in front of you. You had for so long believed he didn’t notice and didn’t care when all along he had. You quickly thought back to all the times he’d offered you food, your favorite foods specifically. All the times he bought your favorite take out even though he could barely afford it, yet you denied eating more than a bite. All this time, that was his way of trying to help you. The only way he knew how that wasn’t taking you to the hospital. Now, he knew he had no choice if he wanted you to survive this.

“I’m okay Kit, really. I just haven’t been hungry—“

“You’re lying y/n.” His voice raised. It wasn’t a yell but it was a plead. “You’re not okay. You’re dying.”

The word dying made you flinch, because it was true. Your body was only weeks away from giving out on you and you knew that. You knew it and you didn’t want it to happen but you couldn’t fix it. Everything he was saying was true. But the thought of getting help and being forced to eat and regain weight was the worst feeling you’ve ever had.

“You can’t do this alone and I’m here for you. I want to help you get help, because I can’t give you the medical help you need. But I can stand by your side every step of the way. I am begging you.” He held your eyes in his, never looking away from them. He needed you to see how serious he was and how serious this situation was. If he could help you the way you needed, he would. He’d never force you to go to the hospital if it wasn’t your life depending on it. But he knew his love and guidance was not enough. He could fill your head with every compliment in the world, reassure you day in and day out that your beautiful no matter how you look, that you don’t have to kill yourself to be beautiful. He could tell you every day that you didn’t have to be skin and bones for him to want you, that he wanted you at your highest and healthiest weight just as much as he wants you now. But your health now wont allow you to be with him forever, and for that, he needs to help you get the correct help. “I’m begging you.”

Your eyes closed, no longer able to bare the brokenness he held. What you were doing may be killing you physically, but it was also killing him mentally. It wasn’t what you intended to do, of course not. You just needed him to open up to you for you to see it. And you knew everything he was saying was true and it was said out of love, from the very bottom of his heart. He was begging you to let him help you the only way he could.

It went silent again as you thought about his request over and over again. Your mind was telling you now but your entire being was begging you to let him. It was fucked up how strong the mind is. How much control it had over the person it belonged to. But you knew of you didn’t allow him to help you that you wouldn’t last much longer, and that was the amount of encouragement you needed to be able to accept his plea.

“okay.” You whispered, your eyes squeezing shut tighter. Suddenly, it felt like you could breathe. Like a weight was lifted off your entire body. Like everything you were fighting alone in was no longer holding you.

“Okay?” Kit whispered. You opened your eyes slowly and blinked through the tears that had formed allowing them to fall. Once your vision was clear and you were able to see Kit, you sniffled and nodded. He nodded along with you, a new small smile forming on his lips. “Okay.” He confirmed, standing from your shared bed and grabbing your hand gently to help you from it.

His eyes skimmed over your fragile body, the sight hurting him deeply. You noticed him doing so, but you didn’t shy away or become embarrassed. You were able to admit you needed help, and it was like your eyes opened wide and you could see the damage your mind was doing to you. And he could see it too.

“We’re gonna get you help, baby. Everything will be okay soon I promise.” He spoke softly, hugging you to him once you were dressed. You wrapped your weak arms around him and rested you head on his chest. Every move you made made you dizzy, and you held him for support as he guided you to the car and helped you in, bucking you and closing your door before entering the drivers side and starting it. His hand reached for yours as he began driving, taking the small thing in his tightly like he was holding it for dear life.

Your mind raced nervously the closer you got to the hospital, wondering what their point of action would be. You were scared they’d take you away or that you’d become a clinical experiment. Kit must’ve been able to tell you were scared, giving your hand a reassuring squeeze.

“It’ll be okay baby. You’re gonna be okay.”

—

Tags: @evanpetersmood @witchsbitchestime @demxnicprxncess @yes-divine-ruler @shjjpm @evanpsrealwife @iruzias @jangsuzchap @quicksilversg1rl @submissiveforahsmen @angelmenace @lovelizzie-blog1 @justa19 @daylas-life @simp4petermaximoff @totta69

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frogofalltime · 11 months ago

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day 13

i forgot to write this last night !!

so i started the day by turning off my alarm and going back to sleep until midday. bad idea.

then i stayed in bed on my phone until 1pm before finally getting up and taking my meds. another bad decision because they take a few hours to work and then they keep working for many more hours so if i take them too late i have way too much energy at bed time

i ate lunch and talked to my flatmate for a while. she always talks to me when she sees me so i usually avoid it when i'm not up for socialising but this time i was in the mood for it so it was good.

then my friend invited me to come over and study with her but i needed to shower first so i didn't get outside until like 5pm

then i talked to @etherealspacejelly (who was in the living room when i arrived) for i have no idea how long. i was being very loud and hyperactive and insane and idek what i was even talking about ?? these meds are making me extremely annoying ,,, i am very sorry robin

finally i actually started studying while eating chocolate and nuts and raisins and banana pieces. normally this is a very effective way to make me study because i really like these snacks but it just made me feel nauseous. i also got unbearably bored and easily distracted

i listened to my friends messing around and ended up joining in. i eventually got everything done although i just gave up on the last two lectures because the content seemed unnecessary for the exam (it probably was necessary, i was just losing my mind by that point)

then i messed around with my friends some more, washed the dishes, and went home. i could hear a really loud ringing in my ears / brain and i felt extremely overstimulated. it was kinda hard to breathe too

when i got home i managed to make myself some food because i hadn't eaten a proper meal yet. i did not feel hungry at all though. i still felt really overstimulated but i ate while reading percy jackson and it calmed me down. but eating is really hard these days. i feel sick from eating even just a small amount, and i don't want food at all :(

my flatmate came into the kitchen to eat her dinner too and asked if i wanted to watch a movie with her ?? we have never hung out before and i was not tired so i said okay. so she put a movie on her ipad on the kitchen table and we watched around half of it but then she finished her food and we both went to bed

i was not tired at all so i listened to part of a 10 hour long youtube video essay about all the problems with harry potter. i did not feel sleepy so i thought it would help. by around 3am i still was not asleep so i turned it off but the pressure in my head and around my eyes was very bad which kept me awake :/

i must've eventually fallen asleep, i have no idea when, but i had three separate stress dreams and i woke up feeling really tired

today i have an exam so i better do some revision beforehand, see ya later

#medicated binya #adhd #audhd #adhd meds #adhd medication

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eyeless-jeff666 · 1 year ago

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Love Hurts (Part 2)

Yandere!Jeanist again except I prefer he didn't hurt or kill people. So he didn't lol. The Erikas are an idea I got from one of the Black Butler musicals that absolutely wrenched me free of every tear I could have possibly shed. Thanks again anon for the ask! :)

The first part has an open ending which I also liked so this isn't necessarily the only possible one :) Angst, positive ending, Yandere

It’s been weeks since Shinya had been taken away by Tsunagu. He was still tied to the bed, his limbs so numb they didn’t even hurt anymore. The blonde had been treating him nothing but well, aside from the involuntary kisses, but even those were kept short and gentle. Shinya thought that if Tsunagu had admitted something sooner, they could have even been a couple. He wouldn’t have suspected anything.

“My little fiber, I brought you rice balls. Please eat something?”

He asked; for a good reason. Shinya hadn’t accepted food in two days and was starting to be really hungry. It wasn’t that Tsunagu had drugged it again since kidnapping the Ninja hero, but it felt so wrong to accept his favorite food now. The Denim Hero sat down by the bed, holding out one of them for the younger one to take a bite. Smiling widely as he did so:

“Oh, I’m so glad. I was beginning to think you were sick. Is it good? I made it as always. Do you want soy sauce?”

“No thank you, Tsu.”

Shinya replied, calmly, as if nothing was wrong. This had worked those past weeks; it was almost scary how normal Tsunagu acted; he wasn’t forceful, wasn’t pushing him at all, always spoke with the same kindness his voice had held since the two of them had met. He seemed content with Shinya just being there, living in his own delusion of being happily married. Shinya wasn’t scared at all which allowed him to think rationally; the other heroes should come soon, probably having a very clear plan ready. Knowing Jeanist’s patterns would give them at least an idea of where the two of them might have disappeared to.

“Tsunagu? Can I ask you something?”

He asked carefully, catching the taller one’s attention:

“Of course, anything.”

“Why didn’t you confess to me? Earlier, I mean. Why did you keep this to yourself?”

It was a question asked in genuine curiosity. Why had the man let himself fall so deep into this pit of obsession and heartache?

“Oh! Oh, that’s easy. You never paid attention to me, the way you did to others.”

Hearing this hurt, but Shinya knew he was right; he had always seen Tsunagu as a friend, and seeing him flirt with others, of any gender no less, must have hurt like hell. Shinya understood that.

“Were you scared to lose me? We could have talked about it. We’ve known each other for so long.”

“I couldn’t live if I lost you, my darling.”

The denim hero replied, his voice sounding full of genuine fear and pain. He stayed silent until Shinya finished eating, then stood up, looking towards the door; like he was waiting. Of course, he knew that somebody would be coming to take away his love. To steal the medicine to a pain he couldn’t handle any longer. Shinya noticed his gaze:

“Tsu. Tsunagu, look at me.”

It was surprising to hear that, but the blonde did; his eyes shining with a strange mix of emotions. The bit of light that was shining in through the pulled-down blinds looked pretty on Shinya’s face, but with each passing day, his tied-up body felt more and more out of place. Tsunagu was trying to push down that feeling but he couldn’t. He went over, laying down, and caressing Shinya’s face, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek, with a sadder expression.

“Are you happy seeing me like this? Unable to move? With no choice?”

Shinya asked, wondering just how deep this delusion Tsunagu had built up was; feeling like it had become more shallow. It was silent for a moment, time ticking by awfully slow, but there was no tension. Just silence and Shinya allowed himself to turn his head after a while:

“Tsu, please answer.”

“I can’t. I don’t want to.”

“Why is that? Because it becomes real when you do? I promise you, we can figure something out.”

The older one’s caresses became more firm, not in a mad way, it wasn’t angry at all, it was desperate. Scared, he was scared:

“I was so happy, having you with me, being able to kiss you. I was happy seeing you all the time but it feels.. wrong now. I want you... I want... I..”

“You are such a clever man, Tsu, you know you will be going to prison right? I can plead for you. If they believe me it’s not Stockholm. I can get you mental help.”

Shinya explained, giving a gentle smile for the first time in weeks, as Tsunagu only listened:

“Wouldn’t you like it if I visited you every day out of my own free will? If I came to see you because I care about you and not because you have me restrained? You haven’t hurt people. You haven’t killed anyone. Tsu, you are not beyond help. You just need to allow yourself to get it.”

“But I kidnapped you. I drugged you and stole you.”

Tsunagu said, and Shinya saw a single tear on the other’s cheek. The atmosphere was weirdly calming, and the gray-haired man continued talking:

“I forgive you for that. You need help, help I can’t give you and I know you’re not going to be happy like this long-term. I will make you a promise if you agree. I promise you will not lose me as a friend. I will not leave you. I will not let you serve more time than the court gives you. But I want you to promise in return to get help. There are good mental facilities, they are not all bad. I will support you.”

“But.. but you won’t love me.”

“Tsu, there are more kinds of love than romantic. I love you as a friend. I care about you so much. I want you to be okay, and I know you are not a bad person. You aren’t, you are a hero. I’ve known you for so long, and you are kind and nice, and talented. I admire you. But you have to prove to everyone that you can be good.”

Tsunagu was about to reply as the door flew open with a crash; seconds before people stormed in; Endeavor and Mirko first, followed by Hawks, all ready to fight and Tsunagu looked at his love with fear in his eyes.

“Don’t attack!!”

Shinya yelled, and the three froze, keeping out anyone still outside the door. One last kiss fell on his lips before Tsunagu got up from the bad, calmly and slowly how he had been taught to in a situation like that. He slowly raised his hands, closing them into fists to signify he wasn’t going to use his quirk on them.

The heroes all looked confused, even more so as Tsunagu began to cry more, with heartwrenching sobs, not resisting at all as Mirko pinned him down. Shinya asked her to be gentle, and Jeanist only moved his hands to free Shinya from the threads holding him trapped against the bed; it hurt to move his limbs after so long, but he could stand with Hawks’ help:

“I will keep my promise, I hope you know that Tsu. I want you to get better. I will just need to see when I can visit you. But I promise you I will come. It might hurt until then, and you might feel like I will not, but I promise you so much that I will.”

The days passed, it was a struggle for Shinya to rush through checkups, assuring the doctors and his colleagues he was fine. It was a struggle to get through psychological checkups and to convince people that his care for Tsunagu was genuine and not a result of trauma. It wasn’t Stockholm, because the feelings were the same as before; he wanted to be the blonde’s friend and wanted him to be happy. He couldn’t love him romantically, but he could platonically. And could and wanted to support him. It took a lot of convincing, especially to Endeavor and Mirko, to be allowed to go see Tsunagu again.

And when it was finally time, he brought a single Erika flower to the prison; Tsunagu looked terrible when Shinya saw him; thin, like he hadn’t eaten, and tired. His mind had probably gotten to him and he surely must have wondered if the younger one would really come.

“Hey. I finally made it. I’m sorry it took so long.”

He spoke gently, watching as the other perked up and came to the cell’s door:

“Shi.. I was-“

He started, but the younger one interrupted him; smiling and handing him the flower:

“I know. I had a hard time trying to be allowed to see you. I brought you a flower. Erikas signify friendship, I thought you might like it as a promise.”

“But flowers wilt..”

“I know they do. But our friendship won’t. Not if you get the help you need. If you promise to try your best to get better. And I make another promise; until your heart feels better, I will not start dating. Not Ryukyu and not anyone. I want you to be comfortable. And I don’t want you to feel like I do anything to hurt you on purpose. So I will wait.”

The blonde stared for a moment, then slowly nodded; he wanted to say Shinya didn’t have to do it but he appreciated it too much for that. His heart throbbed so badly already at the knowledge that the younger one would never reciprocate his romantic feelings.

“It hurts so much.”

“I know, Tsu. That’s why I hope that the facility you’ll be brought to will help. If you make an effort, they will shorten your sentence. I pleaded for that. I went through a psychological check-up, one that deemed me in the right state to make such a statement. It hurts me too to see you in pain like that. But I can’t soothe it by making myself unhappy by faking feelings that aren’t there. But a friendship isn’t worth less than a romance. I hope you know that. You won’t lose my attention. Not again.”

He said, taking the other’s hand through the bars; it was warm, and soft, and comfortable. For a moment they just stood there, calmly, and listening to the noises of other people talking:

“If you want to be a hero again, and regain everyone else’s trust, you will have to work really hard for that. I cannot promise it will be a success. I cannot promise you will be okay. I can only promise you that I will be there but only if you try.”

“What if I won’t be better?”

“I am optimistic. I know you. But if not then we will have to see from there. It’s normal that there won’t be instant improvements, and it’s normal for there to be declines from time to time. I want you to know that so you don’t lose hope. You will need that hope and you can’t give up.”

Shinya spoke, his voice still soft and calm. Tsunagu looked at him, being the one to let go of the short one’s hand:

“What if I tried only for you?”

“Then you still try. I’m sure you will be able to do it for yourself, once you start improving. I just want you to know you’re not alone at all. I know your mind will plague you enough.”

For the rest of the allowed visitation time, the two talked; not always about relevant things, some moments were spent entirely on memories, jokes and plans. Shinya promised to take him skating again. To have movie nights and dinners still. Tsunagu even agreed to try and speak with Ryukyu as well about everything. Once her anger died down.

Months flew by like minutes, and the mental facility Tsunagu stayed at permanently now, after his seven-month-long prison sentence, helped him greatly. Therapy was provided and he could speak freely about his feelings. His obsession and the unbearable pain. He was trying different medications, all safely observed by doctors, and Shinya visited him often. After around three months, other heroes had also started seeing him again. Especially scary was the moment of Gang Orca stomping towards him, causing him to flinch thinking he’d hit him only to be pulled into a tight hug.

“Tsunagu how much of an idiot are you?!”

He had said, but with the explanations and Tsunagu’s attempt at redemption, was more worried than angry. Shinya forgave him after all, so he was willing to do the same. It didn’t change what he did and that certainly wouldn’t be forgotten, but there was room for forgiveness nonetheless.

There was improvement, good improvement, only interrupted by days where Tsunagu felt like dying; pain overwhelming him along with despair of having surrendered without a fight. He was upset those days, angry with himself, and the only talking he did with people was when he asked the staff for some time alone. As alone as they let him be at that point. But overall, the worst thing about this facility was that he couldn’t wear his beloved denim fabric; trapped in ugly uncreative clothes he wanted to pimp with literally anything.

After over a year, he was allowed to return to his own apartment; still needing to serve mandatory therapy sessions, but overall free again. He did a lot of social work during this time, soon retaking leadership of his agency. Many of his sidekicks had left, while others stayed loyal to him albeit with cracked trust.

The pain was also a loyal companion, but now it wasn’t as bad. He wasn’t keeping it hidden to himself. Shinya wasn’t unaware of his feelings. Everyone knew now and everyone supported him when he needed time. It wasn’t jealousy now when Shinya was with Ryukyu, it was something else he couldn’t explain. But he got the other’s attention in equal amounts now, and the platonic aura, the different look Shinya gave him began to feel like something special rather than something bad. They were best friends. They could rely on each other. And fight together and even though he would never wake up to kiss Shinya, he could still wake up laughing with him after falling asleep on the couch during a movie.

But what was even stronger than the pain was the pure happiness of not losing Shinya’s light. He would be able to appreciate the friendship fully, one day, he knew that he could, if he just kept on putting effort into accepting the help that had been long overdue.

And that brought him a spark of peace he’d never felt.

#best jeanist #edgeshot #mha #fanfiction #tsunagu hakamada #shinya kamihara #edgejeanist #bestshot #yandere tsunagu hakamada #yandere best jeanist #angst #good ending #happy ending #ryukyu

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stargazer-sims · 1 year ago

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Expect the Unexpected

Yuri was up bright and early to take care of his share of the daily chores. At first, everything seemed normal, but then he noticed that Treasure wasn't eating. She kept following him with her gaze, as if she was doing her best to communicate with him. Something was definitely off.

Even her morning beauty routine didn’t seem to cheer her up.

She wasn’t even enthusiastic about getting her favourite treat, and that really made Yuri worry.

Yuri: You’re not yourself today, are you? I can tell you’re not feeling well. I wish you could talk like a person so you could say exactly what’s the matter. Then I’d know how to help you.

Treasure: I wish I could talk like a person. Then I could tell you what happened between me and Storm. I'm done with stallions forever. He is the worst!

Treasure has the needy trait, which means she constantly craves interaction with people and other horses. She'll seek out attention herself when she feels she's not getting enough, and she can be quite dramatic about it. She followed Yuri around all morning, looking very sad and depressed.

Treasure: Do you want to know the most awful thing? I love Storm and I wanted us to have a fairytale romance and live happily ever after, but I think all he wants is to perpetuate his bloodline. It's so tragic! I mean, I'm a princess, aren't I? You always say so, and being a princess means I should get a 'happily ever after', right? But, maybe I'm a princess who's not destined for true love...

Yuri: Victor, there's something wrong with Treasure. She's acting like she's uncomfortable and she's being a lot more clingy than usual. I think she might be sick.

Victor: I think I might have an idea about what it is.

Yuri: You do?

Victor: Yeah. You know how we've been letting her and Storm sleep in the same stall?

Yuri: Yes, because she doesn't seem to like being in a stall by herself. She's a lot more calm when one of the others is in there.

Victor: I'm thinking maybe we should've paired her up with Cookie instead.

Yuri: Why?

Victor: Because Storm is a boy and Treasure is a girl, and uh... stuff can happen when nobody's looking.

Yuri: Ohh... really? Do you think that's really what it is?

Victor: Let me call Mom. She and Julian will know what to do. They can tell us what we should be watching for, and they can probably recommend a local vet.

Victor's mother Grace and stepfather Julian are both veterinarians in Willow Creek.

Victor: Don't worry. Everything's going to be fine.

Yuri: I hope so.

Victor: Here you go. You are hungry, aren't you? You just wouldn't eat unless somebody hand-fed you because you wanted more attention.

Treasure: One of you has to be with me at all times. I can't be alone for a single second. I'm in a very delicate condition and I require constant attention. Do you understand?

Victor: You'll be okay. The vet will be here soon, and they'll figure everything out.

The vet confirmed Victor's suspicions about Treasure's condition. The family will soon be welcoming a new foal.

Treasure isn't allowed to practice jumping while she's pregnant, and she can't even go for long, relaxing rides with Yuri, which leaves her very bored. Nevertheless, she's decided that she's happy about the foal, even if she has mixed feelings about Storm right now and is disappointed about having to take a break from her sport.

#ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 horse ranch #sims 4 horse ranch #chestnut ridge #treasure okamoto nelson #yuri okamoto #victor nelson #stargazersims

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frostfloweragainlol-alias-juno · 2 years ago

Text

This is my first attempt at a kind of fanfic i guess? Lol its a bit of a test

Lets see how it goes

This is part 1

Dex belongs to @leech-twinz

Warnings: cussing , light sickness (flu)

Ships present: Cain x Oc (Dex), Abel x Larry

5 am

Another morning at site 17. Another day at the foundation. Scp 073 reached out to the alarm, which’s annoying ringtone had woken him up, and turned it off. He yawned, questioning to himself how he could be more tired than when he went to bed, and got up. Cain walked up to the bathroom, turned the tap on and started washing his face with cold water, in the attempt to better wake up and hopefully shake off this strange feeling of fatigue and tiredness. He turned off the tap and grabbed a towel to his face, then looked up:“Man, I really should shave '' was his first thought upon seeing his reflection in the mirror , but something made him observe closely. Cain noticed that his face was unusually pale and the bags under his eyes were somehow blacker than normal . “Yes, maybe I should '' he mumbled. He decided to dismiss the entire situation to the fact that maybe he should sleep more. There was no way he was sick. He hasn’t been sick in 1000 years! Nope, he must've been just tired. Right ? He sighed and made his way to the door leading on the corridor, then proceeded straight walking past the site’s canteen. Usually he would have stopped for some breakfast, but this time, while well knowing it wasn’t that much of a good idea, he decided not to. He didn’t feel much like eating right now, and only the thought of food made him nauseous.

“Hey dumbass!”

073 looked up

“Good morning to you too, brother”

“Have you seen Frost by any chance? It’s at least 30 minutes that i look for her!”

“Abel you know very well that she is never up before 8 am”

“And?”

“It’s 5 am”

“Oh”

“You guys better not be talking behind my back” Frost walked towards her brothers with a smirk

“Huh, since when are you a morning person ?” Smiled Cain

“Oh I’m not. But Zack unfortunately is. And the ringtone of his alarm today was so loud that I heard it from my cell. And that’s why I’m awake” Frost yawned “Man, I hate waking up- ... early-“

Scp 9108 stopped “Dude you alright? You don’t look too good “

Abel immediately looked at Cain

“Hm? Oh! Yes I’m fine, just tired” 073 shrugged off “ Maybe I should sleep more “

Frost stayed silent for a moment. 076 instead didn’t break eye contact , not believing a word of what his brother just said

“Fine” she obliged “still, you probably should go back to bed. You are pale as fuck “

“Nah, I’m fine”

“Well, I was going to eat something. Would you guys like to come too?”

“Fuck yeah! I haven’t had breakfast yet!” exclaimed Abel

“Thanks but no. I’m not hungry “

Abel began to stare again at his older brother

“What?”

“Nothing. Why?“

“You were looking at me weird—“

“I wasn’t “ argued 076

“...ok?””Anyway , I have to go. I have to catalog some documents and Doctor Glass asked me for some help. If you need me I’ll be in his office”

“Ok! See you later brother”

As Cain walked away Frost and Abel shared a worried look

“That was wired -“ mumbled 9108

“...”

“Aby?”

“Hm?”

“Dude, were you even listening to me?”

“Yeah. Sorry I was just thinking”

“—-“ “Yes, I’m worried too”

“Never said I was”

“Hmh. Yeah. Sure-“

Abel shrugged

Of course he was worried. Why would his brother lie like that?

“Hi guys!“

“AAHH!” 9108 rapidly looked behind her

“ Oh shoot! I’m sorry“ started apologizing Dex upon seeing the reaction of his sister-in-law

“No prob “ Frost reassured him “I just didn’t expect that lol”

“SERIOUSLY what does ‘lol’ mean?!” Abel glanced at the both of them in anger

“Pff-“

“Oh come on!”

“Hahahaa!”

076 started mumbling swear words in Sumerian under his breath, thing he always did when he was pissed

“Heyyyy- language-“ 9108 joked

“FUCK. OFF.”

“Ok jeeze “

“Are we going to have breakfast or not? I don’t have all day “

“Fine mr grumpy” she rolled her eyes “ Dex would you like to join?”

Dex nodded happily “Ofc!”he then stopped a second and proceeded to look around “Where’s Cain?”

Silence

Abel and Frost stared at each other.

“He went to help Doctor Glass” Frost responded, and then hesitantly continued with “And- well - he was weird this morning”

Dex started at her confused

“I’ll explain everything, but in the meantime let’s head to the canteen” continued 9108

“Ok” he obliged a bit anxiously

“Ok, and with this we have finished with scp 4001’s documents ” Doctor Glass closed the file on his tablet “Which one is next? Was it 005 ? “

No response

“Cain?” Glass looked up from his tablet and at his friend, who was sitting at the other end of the desk.

Cain had his head on the table , buried in his arms. Did he fall asleep? Wait- is he shaking?

Simon stood up and approached 073. He then proceeded to gently shake him by the shoulder. Cain groaned, blinked several times until he was somewhat awake and then looked up. It took him 10 seconds to realize he had been asleep for all the cataloging of 4001’s files.

“Omg- I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to fall asleep like that “ he then apologized, with a weak voice

Doctor Glass stared at him worried. Cain was sweating and shaking, and was clearly trying to keep his eyes open to avoid falling asleep again, though he barely managed to keep them only halfway open.

“Are you ok?”

“Yeah , I’m fine”

‘-No you aren’t-‘ Thought the scientist

“Listen, we actually finished cataloging everything for today, and I thank you a lot for helping me. ” He said “But you don’t look well at all, you really should go and rest.”

Cain stared at the table for several seconds, and finally nodded. He was right. It was stupid to keep working while in that state. He proceeded to stand up and, after waving off Doctor Glass, he started heading back to his chamber.

Abel made his way in the corridor, trying to focus on the incoming mission, but still failed to shake off the feeling of worry. He kept on walking, trying not to think about it. Then he noticed a familiar face in the corridor, coming from the opposite direction.

Cain? He already finished cataloging ?

“Cain!”

073 raised his eyes

Abel approached him. He observed him for a second and then immediately asked

“Are you ok?”

Cain stayed quiet for a few minutes. He really did not want to worry his brother, but it was too obvious at that point that he indeed wasn’t fine.

He shook his head. No.

076 placed a hand on 073’s forehead for then commenting with “ Your burning up! How are you even standing up!?” and “I’m bringing you back to your chamber this instant!”

Cain didn’t say a word, he just nodded. He was too exhausted to do anything else other than that.

Upon entering the cell, Abel immediately placed his brother in bed. He then proceeded to find and hand him a thermometer.

“Well? Don’t just stare at it dumbass!” He said annoyed, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Cain glanced at Abel “Calm down, sheesh”

“Just use it idiot “

A few seconds later the thermometer beeped and 073 it handed it back to 076

“104 °F? How in the FUCK are you even still conscious?!”

Abel sighed

“What made you think it was a good idea going to work like this?!” He then yelled

“ I don’t know “

“What do you mean you don’t know?!?!”

“I- don’t know, ok? Maybe I didn’t want to worry anybody or maybe it was for another reason. I just don’t know “

“Well you just fucking worsen things. Couldn’t you just use your brain and think about it for once?! Why tf are you so -“

“....I know...... you’re right ........I’m sorry”

He lowered his head, staring at his hands, that was now squeezing tightly into fists

-Aw shit - Abel sighed again

“Hey- I didn’t mea-“

“I know. Don’t worry “

“No really I’m sor- “

“No problem “

076 grabbed him by the shoulders

“ Cain please. I really didn’t mean to yell at you like that. I was just worried”

Cain looked up at his brother

“And sometimes you should take a break from work” Abel continued “You need some time to rest , you’re not a robot for God’s sake!”

Cain nodded

“Guess you’re r-“ his sentence was roughly interrupted by a series of coughing fits and a sneeze.

“Uh- I’ll get you some tissues. You’ll need them “ 076 stood up

073 sniffled “Thank you” he replied weakly

Abel got some tissues and some cough and fever medicine , then gave the tissues to Cain, just in time for him to sneeze into one. He also handed him the medication along with a spoon

“Don’t stain the sheets with that “ he slightly smirked

Cain nodded again, this time with a weak smile

#please do not ship 073 and 076 qvq #scp #scp foundation #scp fanfiction #scp 076 2 #scp 076 abel x scp 106 larry #scp 076 abel #scp 076 #scp 9108 frost #scp073076and9108cousins #scp 073 #scp 9108 #scp9108frost #scp dr glass #scp oc #scp 073 cain #brother bonding #sibling bonding #scp 073xoc

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