#i was going to draw teen cherri and honestly this still might be him

[rosehipsister]

Zone 8 pop up market Day 1: April showers

Fave genre of “technically danger days art but at this point can be whatever” hi @realkilljoyhoursnow

[intheticklecloset]

SK8 the Infinity Sentence Starters #1-10

A collection of the SK8 the Infinity sentence starters I’ve done, compiled for the sake of ease. These are all stand-alone stories.

~~~

1) Lee Reki, Lers Miya and Langa

“How is your stomach this ticklish?!” Miya laughed. He was sitting on Reki’s waist, scribbling his fingers wildly over the redhead’s belly. He was barely touching him, yet Reki was completely lost in his own giggles, unable to do more than shake his head in protest.

Langa held Reki’s arms above his head, pinning them down so he couldn’t fight back. He grinned. “You know, Miya, if you call it his tummy instead he’ll get really flustered.”

“Nohohohohohoho!” Reki whined, digging his heels into the ground behind the younger skater. “Plehehehehease, just lehehehehet me go!”

“Your tummy, huh?” Miya smirked, shoving Reki’s hoodie up so his stomach lay bare, bouncing with his unstoppable giggles. The dark-haired boy dragged his nails from the bottoms of Reki’s ribs to his waistline and everywhere in between. “You got a ticklish tummy, huh, slime?”

“Plehehehehease,” Reki wheezed, giggling so hard he felt tears springing to his eyes. He tried to pull his arms down, but Langa held him tight. He was completely at Miya’s mercy. “Stohohohohop, I cahahahahan’t!”

“Can’t take a little tickling? Tch, I thought you were stronger than that, Reki.” Miya grinned, enjoying how the words seemed to mess with the older redhead. He stuck a finger in his belly button and wiggled. “Oh, look, a tickle button!”

“Nahahahahahahahaha! Dohohohohohohon’t cahahahahall it thahahahahat!”

“But it makes you laugh, so it has to be a tickle button! What else could it be?” Miya dug in even deeper, sending Reki into hysterical giggling fits the likes of which neither he nor Langa had ever seen before. He couldn’t help but smile at the mess he was making of the usually tough redhead.

Langa was beaming, too. “Oh, Reki, you’re in trouble now~”

*

2) Lee Miya, Lers Reki and Langa

“This isn’t fair!” Miya yelled, writhing and kicking against Reki and Langa, who were struggling to hold him down.

“You lost the game, dude,” Reki replied. “You gotta get your tattoo now.”

“No! I know where you’ll put it!”

Langa finally grabbed both of the smaller boy’s wrists and pulled them above his head, sitting on them to keep him in place. “Reki, sit on his thighs so he can’t kick you.”

Reki did just that, then pushed Miya’s t-shirt up to expose the lower half of his belly. He uncapped the marker. “All right, here we go. Hold still, Miya.”

“No! Nohohohohohohoho!” Miya squealed, doing his best to hold back his flood of giggles but failing almost instantaneously. He burst into high-pitched squeaks and snorts, his belly bouncing from the force of his hysterics. “Nohohohohohoho, it tihihihihihihickles! Reheheheheki!”

“I’m just going to draw a sunflower,” Reki said, grinning at Miya’s distress, purposely taking his time with the outline of the picture. “Hang in there, buddy.”

Miya whined, losing the willpower to fight altogether. He went as limp as he could, giggling and snorting like crazy, tears coming to his eyes but not another word of protest leaving his lips.

Reki was honestly impressed. With a glance up at Langa, he could tell his friend was, too. He still took his time, drawing out every giggle and squeak he could from the younger boy, but finally he finished his sunflower “tattoo” and sat back, capping the marker with a flourish. “There! All done.”

“F-Finally,” Miya gasped, still grinning widely. He squirmed again. “Let me up.”

“Hold on, Miya. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you liked being tickled just now,” Langa said, smiling at the pink flush that came to their little friend’s cheeks at the teasing accusation.

“W-Well, what if I did?”

The two older boys exchanged smirks, and when Reki went back to tickling his tummy, Langa joined in by tickling Miya’s underarms.

“If you did,” Langa replied, “then we’ll be happy to keep going until you’ve had enough.”

*

3) Lee Reki, Ler Langa

“Oh wow, Reki, I knew your tummy was ticklish but this seems to make you go crazy!”

“PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE STAHAHAHAHAHAP!! LAHAHAHAHAHANGA!!”

Langa took in another huge breath and blew a raspberry over Reki’s belly button, nuzzling his face into the exposed tummy like a cat right afterwards. All of it made Reki’s laughter turn silent, then giggle hysterically as he caught his breath.

“Ticklish tummy, ticklish tummy~” Langa chanted in a sing-songy way. He blew another raspberry.

“STAHAHAHAHAHAP CAHAHAHAHAHALLING IT THAHAHAHAHAT!!” Reki begged, tears springing to his eyes from how hard he’d been laughing for so long now. When Langa switched to nuzzling again, he sputtered, “Y-You knohohohow it mehehehehesses with me, you jeheheheheherk!”

Langa smiled up at him. “Why do you think I keep doing it, ticklish little Reki? With your ticklish little tummy?”

Reki groaned through his giggles. “You suhuhuhuhuck.”

“You love it.” Langa blew another. “Don’t pretend you don’t.”

“I lohohohohohove you,” Reki protested. “Nohohohot the tihihihihihihickling.”

Langa finally sat up, keeping the redhead’s wrists pinned by his sides. “Aww, I love you, too, Reki. But come on – you do like the tickling at least a little. Right? Or have I been misreading you all along?”

Reki blushed, averting his eyes. “I guess it’s not…not the worst thing. When you’re doing it.”

Langa smiled, starting to kiss Reki’s belly rather than nuzzle it this time, pleased with the happy giggles he got in response. “That’s what I thought~”

*

4) Lee Cherry, Ler Joe

“Isn’t it fun?” Joe teased, gripping Cherry’s foot with one hand and lightly dragging his fingers up and down the exposed sole with the other.

Cherry, for his part, was living up to his skater name. His face was pinker than his hair, his cheeks puffed out in an effort to hold back his embarrassing giggles. He wanted to fight back more, but it was taking everything in him just to remain in control as it was. He couldn’t even reply, much as he wanted to. All of his focus was elsewhere.

Joe grinned at him, knowing he’d break eventually. He always did. Always had – even when they were young teens just learning how to skate for the first time. Tickling was always something Cherry had a love-hate relationship with, and he’d fight it every time – until he couldn’t anymore.

“Hmm…how about here?” Joe focused his tickling fingers at the base of Cherry’s toes. “I recall this being a pretty good spot.”

Cherry sputtered, gasped, and quickly regained control over his mirth only at the expense of having to slap his hand against his thigh to balance out the intense sensations he was feeling.

“Hey, now – don’t go beating yourself up,” Joe chuckled, digging harder. “It’s okay to laugh, Kaoru~”

“D-Don’t—” Cherry strained, valiantly fighting for another few seconds before Joe grabbed his other foot and dug into all ten toes at once, and he simply couldn’t hold back anymore. “Dohohohohon’t! Kojiro, you ihihihihihidiot!”

“There it is~” Joe teased, grinning when Cherry finally dissolved into his high-pitched giggling fit that always made him so embarrassed to let go and have fun in the first place. “About time you let go and laughed a little. You of all people especially deserve a good tickling every once in a while.”

“Nohohohohohohoho!”

*

5) Lee Langa, Ler Reki

“You’re totally asking for it.”

“I…I am not!”

“You are.” Reki smirked at Langa, his clawed fingers hovering close to his sides, making the blue-eyed boy shrink away, but only slightly. It was painfully obvious he wasn’t actually afraid of the threat of tickles. If anything, Reki swore he was inviting it. “Come on, you know you want it.”

“N-No I don’t.” Langa’s cheeks were pink. He couldn’t make eye contact.

Reki hesitated a moment, then decided to try something. He retracted his hands, lacing them behind his head as he relaxed into the couch cushion. “All right, fine, I won’t tickle you.” The fleeting look of disappointment on Langa’s features was all confirmation the redhead needed. He laughed, pointing at his friend. “Ha! Caught you!”

Langa scoffed, frustrated and embarrassed about being so easy to read. “Fine, I wasasking for it.”

“I know.” Reki grinned, wiggling his fingers teasingly once more. “Say please.”

“W-What?”

“You heard me.”

Langa groaned, averting his eyes again and mumbling, “Please.”

Reki dove for him, hooking his fingers into Langa’s sides and digging in, searching every bit of soft flesh for the best laughter, the best squirming, the best fighting-back-without-really-fighting. “Aww, look at that big smile! I knew you wanted it~”

“Shuhuhuhuhut up, Reheheheki,” Langa giggled, but he couldn’t deny how happy he was. He weakly grasped Reki’s arms, feeling the muscles tickling him even as more laughter was pulled from his core, all of it almost too flustering to handle. “Ahahahahahahaha!”

“Do you like it?”

Langa nodded.

Reki smirked, straddling him. “Tell me you like it, Langa.”

“Okay, okahahahahay, I like it!” Langa squealed, digging his heels into the couch when Reki moved up to his underarms. “Reheheheheheki!”

Reki chuckled, smiling widely to match his adorable friend. “I had a feeling you did.”

*

6) Lee Cherry, Ler Joe

“If you give it back, I might stop tickling you,” Joe said breezily, smirking at Cherry, who was trying desperately to keep himself under control.

“I d-don’t – don’t have it, y-y-you b-big gorilla!” Cherry snapped, though his voice was strained. It was hard for him to keep composure when his thighs were being squeezed like that.

“I don’t believe you.” Joe had turned his back for one second, and in the next, the brownie he’d been about to eat had disappeared from his plate. Naturally, as Cherry was the only one nearby, he jumped on him before he had a chance to eat it, pinning him in his chair against the bar, squeezing his thighs, determined to get his dessert back. “I’ll keep this up as long as I need to, buddy.”

“Stop it!” Cherry demanded, though a hint of pleading entered his tone. He squirmed in his seat. “I dohohon’t have it – I nehehever even noticed it!”

“Again, I don’t believe you.” Joe sighed, sliding his hand further down to his friend’s knee, which he knew was a particularly ticklish spot. “Give it back, Kaoru.”

“D-Don’t cahahall me that – I don’t h-h-hahahahave it! KOJIRO!!” Cherry tossed his head back and finally let his cackling free, unable to hold back when the undersides of his knee were being assaulted like that. “Plehehehehehease, I’m nohohohot lying!”

“Sure, sure.”

From his place across the bar in a corner booth, Miya smirked at the two of them, eating Joe’s brownie to go along with the evening’s rather amusing entertainment.

*

7) Lee Miya, Ler Langa

Langa grinned at Miya. “Come on, it’ll be fun! Don’t tell me you don’t think you can win?”

Miya glared at him. “I can win anything I set my mind to, slime. Fine, bring it on. You can’t make me laugh.”

Langa felt a little evil for what he was about to do, but he couldn’t help it, and really, Miya had this coming. Just a minute before he’d challenged the younger skater to a game he couldn’t possibly win – a “don’t laugh” challenge. Though he thought it was stupid, Miya had taken the bait and declared war. Now all that was left was for Langa to put him in his place.

He smirked, reached across the couch, and tickled his sides.

“Ehehehehehehehe!” Miya dissolved into high-pitched giggles, grabbing Langa’s wrists. “Hey! No fahahahahahair! Thahahat’s cheheheating!”

“I never said tickling wasn’t allowed,” Langa replied smugly, enjoying how easily he made the younger, arrogant skater crumble at the lightest touch. “You’ve already lost, so just give up, Miya.”

“Whahahahahat’s the pohohohohoint of thahahahat?! This wahahahasn’t a competition!”

Langa shrugged, sliding up to his ribs.

Miya squealed, giggling like a little girl and turning beet red from embarrassment. “Fine, fine, fihihihihihine! I give up! Stahahahahahap!”

Langa beamed, letting him go and sitting back triumphantly. “Told you you couldn’t win.”

“Yeah? Well, I bet you can’t, either!”

“W-Wait – wahahahahahahait, Miyahahahaha—!”

*

8) Lee Langa, Ler Reki

“I wonder how long you can go without laughing?” Reki said aloud, glancing at Langa.

“Hmm?” Langa replied absentmindedly, eyes on the TV screen. “It won’t be hard. This show isn’t that funny.”

“Nah, that’s not what I meant.” Reki reached over and poked his side, grinning at the yelp he pulled from his blue-eyed friend.

Langa stared at him for a moment, then let out a soft, “Oh.”

Reki poked him again, and again, and again, and Langa pressed his lips together, clenching his fists in his lap. This was a game they liked to play sometimes, but it had been a while, and Langa was determined to last longer than he usually did.

“Tickle, tickle.” Reki began teasing with every poke, beaming at how pink Langa’s cheeks became. “Tickle, tickle. Come on, you know I’ll get you to crack eventually~”

“Eventually,” Langa managed. “But not yet.”

“Oh?” Reki began walking his fingers up Langa’s side at a torturously slow pace. “Tickle, tickle, tickle~”

Langa whined, struggling to stay still. He knew where Reki was headed, and the anticipation was killing him. He started clenching and unclenching his fists as a way to hold out, but as soon as Reki brushed the bottom of his underarm hollow, a giggle slipped free, and that was it.

“Nohohohohoho! Dahahahahahang it!” Langa cried as Reki pushed him over, going all-out with his tickling now that he’d broken his friend. “I thohohohohohought I could mahahahake it this tihihime!”

“You say that every time,” Reki laughed.

“One dahahahahahay I’ll beheheheheheat you! I wohohohohon’t breheheheheak!”

“Uh-huh.” Reki winked at him. “I’ll believe that when I see it.”

*

9) Lee Reki, Ler Langa

Reki was going to die laughing if Langa didn’t let up soon. He hunched over, barely able to stand on his own as his taller friend assaulted his tummy and belly button from behind, hugging him close as he shrieked with giggles.

“Give it up, Reki,” Langa teased into his ear. “You know you can’t take it much more. Promise you won’t get revenge.”

“NO WAHAHAHAHAY!! YOU DESEHEHEHEHEHERVE IT, YOU JERK - NOHOHOHOHOHO LANGA NOT THAHAHAHAHAHAT!!” Reki screeched when his friend started digging in relentlessly, scribbling and scratching and wiggling his fingers all over the redhead’s tummy, forcing him into loud peals of hysterical pleading. “PLEASE PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE PLEASE LANGA ENOHOHOHOHOUGH ALREADY!!”

“Say you give up~” Langa chuckled.

“OKAY FIHIHIHIHIHINE I GIVE UP!! YOU WIHIHIHIHIHIN!!”

“And promise you won’t get me back.”

Reki whined, but one more deep wiggle into his belly button broke him completely and he cried, “I WON’T!! I WOHOHOHON’T I PROHOHOHOHOMISE!”

Langa finally let him go, smiling wide and rubbing his back as the redhead caught his breath. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

Reki flashed him a wicked smirk that sent a cold shiver down the blue-haired boy’s spine and replied, “I was crossing my fingers.”

*

10) Lee Langa, Ler Reki

“I was crossing my fingers.”

Langa’s eyes went wide. “You were what? Wait!” He yelped and turned to run, but Reki caught him around the middle and squeezed, making the blue-haired boy squeak and choke on a laugh, already giggling before the redhead even got started. “Wahahahait!”

“Wait for what?” Reki teased, determined to get Langa on the ground somehow. He dug into his hips and sides to make him double over, then hooked his foot around one of his friend’s ankles to make him lose his balance. Having successfully gotten him to the floor, he sat on Langa’s lower back and shoved his hands up into his underarms – the taller boy’s weakest spot.

“AH!! NO, WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAIT!!” Langa cried, bursting into laughter, clawing uselessly at the ground, unable to go anywhere. “REHEHEHEHEHEKI!!”

“It’s only fair!” Reki laughed, leaning over to get a better look at his friend’s wide smile. “You went for my worst spot, too.”

“YOU CHEHEHEHEHEHEATED!!”

“Cheated? How so?”

“YOU LIHIHIHIHIHIED TO MEHEHEHE!!” Langa blindly reached back and managed to grab onto Reki’s knee, digging his fingers into the underside of it and making Reki topple over just long enough for him to roll onto his back, but the instant he could see the ceiling again, the redhead was pulling his arms above his head and sitting on them, further exposing his underarms for tickling.

“Now, now, Langa,” Reki admonished teasingly, wasting no time in digging into the boy’s worst spot with renewed vengeance. “You just set yourself up for failure by doing that.”

Langa threw his head back and laughed helplessly, knowing that he deserved this and loving every second of it.

[spnwatch]

Season 2: The Rankings

Whew. Oh boy.

They were still puttering about in season 1 to an extent. But now? Now they’ve really hit their stride. This season was a veritable chocolate box of delights and I ate my way through it. The overall myth arc was kind of nonsensical, but that emotional throughline? Christ. Spn buries SO MUCH emotional complexity into its leads, and they cashed in every cent in that two part finale. It packs one hell of a punch. And yeah, okay, I knew the broad strokes, the twists and turns. It’s hard not to be spoilered for a season of tv that aired over a decade ago. But reader! It mattered not!! I. Still. Wept. That’s when you know it’s the good kush.  1.) 2x12: NIGHTSHIFTER. This one just snagged the top spot by merit of its sheer ambition. Supernatural often feels like a very empty universe to me, just two guys and one car drifting from place to place. Which is fine, it makes for compelling TV, but they totally flipped the script here and this episode really dazzles precisely because of that contrast. It’s a huge, cinematic episode, a metropolitan setting full of uncontrollable elements, and it’s great to see Sam and Dean so profoundly vulnerable. The outside world is pressing up against the windows. They have sniper dots trained on them! They are, literally and figuratively, out of their depth! We’re not in Kansas any more, baby. God, I haven’t even mentioned the supporting characters. The entire mandroid rant deserves an Emmy. Victor Henrickson’s entrance! Heist movie antics! Agh!  10/10  

2.) 2x07: THE USUAL SUSPECTS. Again this episode was a cut above precisely because it showed us what the brothers look like from the outside: sketchy as all hell. It’s so good when reality ensures, because it’s great to be reminded they lead objectively insane lives! Through Linda Blair’s eyes we get to see just how unknowable, feral and amoral they appear to the eyes of polite society. Put under a microscope like this, they’re scary guys! They’re just not socialised like normal people. They don’t really care about being arrested, or about the felonies. Getting arrested is an irritant above everything else. They’re still working the case from the inside. They’re professionals; excellent liars, and totally in sync with each other. The handwritten notes they pass, like delinquent school kids! A delight! The thrill lies in watching Blair slowly unwrap their strange logic, and unravel the mystery of both the brothers and the ghost. Ugh, what a great perspective shift. I’m 100% here for it. 10/10 

 3.) 2x09: CROATOAN. Ugh, this setting. Small Town Gothic, complete with eerie mist, hostile locals and creepy Stepford vibes. Sam really shone in this episode. He’s so soothing and giant, and it made his suffering at the end all the more devastaing. The real reason this episode ranks so highly is their conversation in the surgery. It just killed me. Dean’s sheer, bone-deep exhaustion, his admission that he’s tired of the life. Sam’s despair, because he knows Dean won’t leave. The performances were so steller. I can’t even really think too deeply about it because it makes me too crazy. 10/10  

 4.) 2x21: ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE: PART ONE. I loved this finale so much more than the finale in Season 1, LOL. It might just be because I’m more invested now, who knows. The opening of this episode is a piece of art: Boston playing on the car stereo, the rain, the small cafe, the lighting. Gorgeous. I love when they have to interact with ordinary people! It adds so much: texture, humour, personality! It draws things out of Sam and Dean that we just don’t see when they have each other to bounce off of. It was so good to see Ava and Andy again. “I just woke up in freakin’ Frontierland!” The gang’s all here, folks! This episode would rank higher, but recieves minus points for the long boring speech the demon gives Sam, and killing off the first gay in the show 0.2 seconds after her introduction. Anyway. The ending of course unzipped me; Dean cradling Sam’s dead body, muttering “It’s okay, it’s not even that bad.” The elation of their reunion, so devastaingly cut short! Sam, twenty two years old, bleeding out in the mud. The sheer, hopelessness of it all. The horror. My notes for the end of the episode simply read: “Dean oh Christ. Oh my God. Oh no.” It’s just one of those scenes that stay with you long after the credits start rolling. 9/10   

5.) 2x20: WHAT IS AND WHAT SHOULD NEVER BE. I never thought I could be so profoundly upset by watching a man happily mowing a lawn. Dean’s trauma over the loss of his mother has undercut the whole show up until this point, and here it bursts to the fore. What really got me was the simplicity of it all. Just a sit-down dinner, an engagement. A beer on the porch. Fuck, he deserves it. He deserves everything. All the performances were great, they really served to show there’s a whole life in these AU characters. The fact it wasn’t all perfect was bizarrely more devastating. AU Sam’s weird straight hair and dorky jacket sealed the deal for me, as did his baffled terror in the warehouse. But even here, with no training and no idea what’s happening, he gets into the Impala! Because that’s his brother! Because I’m a huge baby I had to remove points because of how upsetting I found Sam’s quiet hostility towards Dean, HA. But that’s really just a testament to how well-realised their dynamic has become by the second season. 9/10  

 6.) 2x15: TALL TALES. Every single thing Sam does in any of Dean’s memories. Also alien slowdance set to “Lady in Red.” Also Bobby breaking them up like they’re petulant children. Gold, all of it gold. 9/10 

 7.)  2x11: PLAYTHINGS. So I’m a slut for a cool setting, obviously. Turns out, Supernatural did The Haunting of Bly Manor fifteen years ago. The swimming pool! The attic! Creepy dolls! The weird little playground! This episode has it all! I loved the saga between the ghost sister and the old lady, which would honestly make a killer movie in its own right. But I’m digressing. The main star of this episode was, of course, Dean’s profound and escalating sexual insecurities. “Well, you are kinda butch. People probably think you’re overcompensating.” FATALITY. I would’ve placed this one higher but the weird incestuous undertones kinda squicked me out... however, I did think we were meant to be creeped out by it, which is more than I can say for some other uh. Instances. It was, after all, beautifully paralelled at the end with the two sisters reuniting in death. “I can’t leave here, and you can’t leave me.” SHUDDER. Also, honestly, can Sam have one (1) breakdown on his own without Dean’s own emotional baggage taking over? Older siblings, smh. 9/10

8.) 2x22: ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE: PART TWO. This one ranks lower than part one purely because I thought the yellow-eyed demon’s overall plot was kinda nonsensical, and I cared not for John’s weird deux ex machina moment. Like do you expect me to feel sorry for that bitch? I don’t! Anyway, that being said, let’s move on to Dean’s eyes in the junkyard when Bobby asks him, “do you have that low an opinion of yourself?” They’re so flat. So dead, like a shark’s. He doesn’t need to say anything back, because it’s all over his face. That non-expression says it all. This is the culmination of the emotional arc that began with his savage beatdown of the Impala in episode 2x02. To call it survivor’s guilt wouldn’t even begin to cover what Dean goes through this episode. It’s all in Ackles’ performance; in the the way he yells, “What am I supposed to do now, Sammy?” The complete claustrophobia of it all. There’s nothing for it but to make the deal. Dean’s been moving inexorably towards this moment for the entire season. 9/10   

 9.) 2x13: HOUSES OF THE HOLY. What a kooky little episode! Magic fingers! Sam’s costcutter seance purchases! The scooby-doo placemat he uses as a makeshift altar! I love him, your honour. Obviously this episode has a lot of *~dramatic irony~* in it because of the later seasons, but it stands alone as a total banger. I was so gutted for Sam when the "angel” was revealed. So many good little Sam moments to be found in this episode. His soft, quiet little revelation that he prays every day. His awkward, earnest explanation to the horrified priest! Dean gets some great moments chasing down the would-be rapist down those dark, snow-covered streets. His speech to Sam where he explains his lack of belief is brief, but it’s a total gut punch. Rounding it off with Knockin on Heaven’s Door was just the cherry on top. 9/10 

 10.) 2x14: BORN UNDER A BAD SIGN. Ahaha I love the way Dean acts whenever Sam’s psychic powers come up. He treats him like a rebellious teen, it’s so funny. “What’s going on with you, Sam? Smokin’, drinkin’?” As if Sam’s behaviour was a) at all under his control or b) anything Dean wouldn’t HIMSELF do. Dean’s just like, this isn’t how I raised you! Truly hysterical. The whole sequence between Meg!Sam and Jo was fantastic and horrible. Sam’s huge physique is never threatening, but it really was in that moment. The interplay between them was totally spine-tingling. Meg’s impression Sam slowly crumbling away over the course of the episode was so compelling and I’m sure it will be a really fun rewatch now I know the *twist*. 9/10  

Favourite lines this season: 

The way Sam says “black cat’s bone” in 2x08

“You’re not gonna go kill somebody because a ghost told you to, are you insane?!” - Dean, 2x13

“Dean, this is a very serious investigation, we don’t have time for your blah blah blah blah.” - Sam (according to Dean), 2x15

“I’m fine, except for every single thing that’s happening.” - Ava, 2x21 

[lady-wallace]

Whumptober Day 23: “What’s a Whumpee Gotta do to Get Some Sleep?” (JJBA)

Day Twenty-Three: What’s a Whumpee Gotta do to Get Some Sleep Around Here?

Prompts used: Exhaustion, sleep deprivation

Fandom: JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders

Thanks to @c-c-cherry for letting me use some of her headcanons for this fic! (Check out her stories!)

Read on Ao3

Read on FF.net

~~~~~~~

Jotaro wasn't sure what tipped him off at first but once he realized it, he wasn't sure how he had missed it before.

Kakyoin wasn't sleeping.

Not just, he wasn't sleeping well—when did they ever? Between fear of enemy Stand attacks and the trauma and worry, Jotaro would be surprised if any of them slept well, and he knew that both Kakyoin and Polnareff had nightmares frequently—and do did he. No, Kakyoin wasn't just suffering bad nightmares, he wasn't sleeping, period.

Jotaro first thought it might be a fluke thing and, hey, he wouldn't judge. There were nights he couldn't get to sleep either and would stay awake for hours. But Kakyoin, even when he did wake up from nightmares, would usually at least fall asleep before Jotaro. But then this happened two nights in a row, and Kakyoin was beginning to look rough. The circles under his eyes looked like bruises set into his pale skin. Polnareff brought it up at breakfast but Kakyoin shrugged him off, murmuring something about a bad night.

That day they took a train and Jotaro sat across from the other student. Both of them were reading, but Kakyoin would nod off every once in a while, before starting back awake with a terrified expression on his face, before he would shake himself, or get up as if to make sure he didn't fall back asleep.

Jotaro narrowed his eyes, not sure what to make of this.

Kakyoin had been acting a little strange since they had crashed the airplane in the desert. That whole thing with the baby…Jotaro still didn't understand exactly what had happened. Only that Kakyoin had been so convinced the baby was a stand user that night and then the next morning, he hadn't said a word about it.

Jotaro had been sure something was up with that and had the nagging feeling he was forgetting something important. It was possible that whatever had happened might have had something to do with why Kakyoin couldn't, or perhaps wouldn't sleep now.

Not that he liked prying into other people's business, but if Kakyoin kept this up, he wouldn't do any of them any good, and could be a danger to himself as well. If he stayed up another night, Jotaro might try to talk to him.

That night at the hotel, they stayed in the same room again, and Jotaro sat in bed, reading for a bit, before he turned the light off and lay down. He pretended to sleep, but was really waiting for Kakyoin to do so first, seeing if his suspicions were correct.

Hours passed, and Jotaro was actually worried he would drift off first. The red-head though, only sat up in bed, arms clutched around his knees, staring at the wall across from him and shaking slightly. Jotaro couldn't even imagine what it was like to stay awake for—going on three days now? How was he even functioning? How had he not passed out yet?

He watched from under half-closed lids as Kakyoin got up, nearly tripping over his blankets, and stumbled to the bathroom, where Jotaro heard splashing water, probably trying to wake himself up.

Okay, now he was convinced that Kakyoin was actually trying to keep himself awake. This was a problem.

He probably should have said something, but he just didn't know. He stayed awake for another hour thinking about what he could do to help his friend.

XXX

The next day, Kakyoin barely stumbled down to breakfast and onto the train they would again be taking. Jotaro winced at how bad he looked, how uncoordinated.

Thankfully, the old man noticed too. "Kakyoin, are you okay?"

Kakyoin didn't reply, simply staring out the window.

"Hey," Jotaro called, nudging his leg with a foot.

Kakyoin startled, inhaling sharply. "What is it?"

Jotaro and his grandfather both looked at him with concern.

"I was just wondering if you were all right, you look terrible," Joseph said with his usual lack of tact.

Kakyoin ducked his head. "I'm fine, Mr. Joestar. Just haven't been sleeping that well lately."

"Well, maybe try turning in early tonight," Joseph said.

Jotaro didn't miss the way Kakyoin swallowed hard at his words, his eyes haunted.

That night when they got to the hotel and settled into their room, Kakyoin went off to take a shower—probably a cold one, considering the lack of steam from under the door. While he was gone, Jotaro prepared a tea he'd bought earlier that day in the market. It was for sleeping, and was primarily chamomile, like his mother always drank when she couldn't sleep. He hoped it might help.

When Kakyoin came back out, hair damp, he was confronted by Jotaro, holding two mugs.

"What's this?" he asked.

Jotaro pressed one into his hands. "It's for sleeping. I know you haven't even slept a couple hours the last few nights."

Kakyoin paled slightly. "I…I have—"

"No, you haven't," Jotaro replied. And forced the tea into the other teen's hands. "Drink it."

"I don't…know if I want to."

That was a strange answer. "Why not?"

"I…It's hard to explain," Kakyoin said, slumping down on his bed, looking into the mug.

Jotaro sat on his own bed, across from him, their knees almost touching in the cramped space. He didn't need to touch Kakyoin to know he was trembling though.

"Then tell me," Jotaro insisted. "I get it, we've all been through a lot of shit, but—"

"It's not like that," Kakyoin snapped. "It's not…nightmares…I…" He bit his lip and looked away, setting the tea aside before wrapping his arms around himself, fingers digging into his arm—particularly around the spot where he'd had that scar, the one they thought he'd made there himself.

"You can tell me," Jotaro insisted calmly. "You can't keep doing this, Kakyoin."

"You wouldn't understand! None of you did!" Kakyoin snapped and hugged himself tighter.

"You're talking about what happened in the desert, aren't you?"

Kakyoin looked over at him with some surprise, but then he nodded.

"Then tell me," Jotaro said firmly.

"You wouldn't believe me," Kakyoin whispered, curling into himself.

"Yeah, I would," Jotaro told him. "I don't exactly know what happened out there, but I know I'm missing something. I just get this feeling there's something I'm forgetting and I what to know what it is. Especially if that's what's making you too scared to sleep. I know you, Kakyoin, you don't scare easily."

Kakyoin was shaking. He bit his lip, fingernails digging into his arm until Jotaro was afraid he would draw blood, but then he said, "It was the baby, you know."

Jotaro sat up silently, and listened.

"It's Stand trapped people in their sleep, in some…freakish, dream world."

Jotaro blinked, something that he couldn't quite grasp pinging in his mind.

"The only way you could get out was to wake up," Kakyoin whispered. "And you wouldn't remember anything about it."

Oh, god, Jotaro realized suddenly. If that was true, then when they had knocked Kakyoin unconscious…

"You didn't believe me, even though I said it was Death 13, the final Stand we knew we were up against. And then you…" he made a strangled sound before he swallowed hard and continued in a shaky voice. "You left me in there, and I couldn't wake up." He reached up to rub angrily as his eyes. "So I can't sleep, because I'm terrified that if I close my eyes I'll end up back there. And I know I will anyway, because eventually, I'm just going to pass out, but until then…"

Jotaro watched his friend with mounting horror and guilt. Sure, he hadn't stepped in when everything had been happening, and, in retrospect, he should have. Because he had known something was up. Kakyoin was always level-headed, he never jumped to conclusions he hadn't calculated thoroughly. Honestly, if the old man and Polnareff hadn't been so convinced, he would have stepped in, and he really should have.

"Kakyoin…"

"Don't," the red-head snapped. "Don't try to apologize. I know it wasn't really your fault, but you could have at least listened."

Jotaro felt another bite of guilt. "Yeah, yeah we could have. I still may not remember what happened, but…I'm sorry you had to go through that, and I'm sorry we didn't believe you. I know this doesn't mean anything, but I do believe you now."

Kakyoin wrapped his arms around his drawn-up knees. "I'm so tired," he whispered.

"Try the tea," Jotaro told him.

Kakyoin glanced over at the steaming cup, looking torn, then finally reached out and cupped it in his shaking hands.

"My…my mom swears by this stuff," Jotaro said, his heart clenching at the mention of his mother. "Never really thought it worked, but I guess it's better than nothing." He took a sip from his own mug.

"I don't know if I can…" Kakyoin whispered hesitantly.

"Kakyoin, you need to sleep," Jotaro said firmly. "You're gonna drop if you don't. You already look like shit."

Kakyoin huffed then hesitantly sipped the tea and Jotaro did the same. It didn't taste great, but maybe it would help. They drank the tea in silence for a long time, just waiting for it to help make them drowsy.

"It's not that I'm not tired," Kakyoin finally admitted. "I'm exhausted. I want to sleep for a week. But I'm scared. I just…I want to forget about all of it."

"The baby's long gone," Jotaro told him simply. "I don't think his Stand range would reach us."

Kakyoin looked at him with narrowed eyes. "That doesn't exactly help my irrational fear, Jojo."

Jotaro huffed. "Okay then, what can we do to make you feel safe enough to sleep? You wanna leave the light on?"

"Maybe," Kakyoin said, drinking the last of the tea and drooping further against the pillows. "I don't know how much good it will do though."

Jotaro set aside his mostly empty mug and pulled his knees up to his chest on the bed, resting back. "I can sit up with you. If you want to talk…I don't mind."

Kakyoin sighed heavily, eyes drooping. He suddenly gasped and jolted upright again, body practically trembling with the surge of nothing but adrenaline keeping him awake.

"Hey," Jotaro sat up. "Just try to relax, let the tea work, and go to sleep."

"I—I can't," Kakyoin choked out, starting to scramble out of bed. "I can't do this!"

Jotaro was on his feet the instant Kakyoin was out of bed and it was a good thing too because the redhead instantly went tumbling toward the floor, body so exhausted his coordination was nonexistent. The taller boy just barely managed to save him from smashing his head on the side table.

He was shocked when Kakyoin latched onto his shirt, shaking and nearly hyperventilating. "Please don't let me fall asleep, Jotaro!"

"Kakyoin," Jotaro said sharply, pushing the other boy down onto the bed and crouching in front of him. "Listen to me. How did you get out of the dream world?"

Kakyoin whimpered, blinking heavily as he swayed. "I—I woke up."

"But how did you defeat the Stand?"

Several more deep breaths before, "With—with Hierophant. Th-the only reason he was there was because he was out when Polnareff knocked me out. If he hadn't been with me, I'd be dead…"

"Then maybe, bring him out while you sleep?" Jotaro asked quietly, trying to be reassuring, but god he was bad at this.

Kakyoin shook his head, terror in his damp eyes. "I can't," he whispered. "I'm too tired. I can't even call him." He swayed again, but this time it wasn't Jotaro who caught him.

Star Platinum seemed to have manifested without Jotaro knowing, hovering behind Kakyoin, and as the boy slumped to the side, the Stand caught him in his arms, wrapping Kakyoin up into a tight embrace.

"Ora," the Stand said quietly, almost reassuringly.

Kakyoin seemed to calm slightly, finally getting his breath back. Star continued to hold him tightly, even rocking him slightly. Jotaro was a bit embarrassed, not knowing why his Stand was doing this.

"Sorry," he muttered. "Star, come on…"

"N-no, it's—it's fine," Kakyoin said and to Jotaro's surprised he was almost melting into the Stand's embrace, blinking heavily. Star Platinum gave a sad smile and helped position Kakyoin in the bed, still just hovering there, huge purple arms wrapped around the redhead.

"You sure? I can make him stop." He thought. But he hadn't called Star Platinum in the first place, and wasn't even sure why he was out.

But if he was actually helping and Hierophant was too exhausted due to Kakyoin's own state, then maybe Jotaro didn't mind lending Kakyoin his Stand for the night. Star was a pretty reassuring presence.

"Ora," the Stand murmured again and continued the soft rocking motion he had been doing.

Kakyoin still trembled but he seemed to relax a little more, eyes drooping further.

"You can sleep," Jotaro said. "I'll leave Star out, and I won't go to sleep until you do. That way, even if the Stand does attack us, we'll be in there together and Star too."

Kakyoin looked over at him. There was still fear in his eyes, and he swallowed hard. "Promise?" he asked.

"Yeah, I promise," Jotaro told him firmly.

Kakyoin swallowed again and gave a jerky nod before melting further into Star's embrace and finally letting his eyes slide shut.

It wasn't long before he finally, finally fell asleep, his body unable to stop itself from resting another second. As soon as Kakyoin had surrendered himself to it, he was out, completely limp.

Jotaro breathed a sigh of relief. He was sure this wasn't going to fix things entirely, you didn't just get over trauma like that, but if Kakyoin slept that night, then that was at least a start.

Star Platinum lowered Kakyoin onto the bed and then moved to sit on the end of his bed, hovering there, glowing slightly like some kind of guardian spirit.

And really, wasn't that what Stands were in a way? Jotaro sank into bed too, and closed his eyes, feeling better himself for Star's presence.

Maybe he would sleep better that night as well.

[fanfoolishness]

Steven Universe: Future thoughts

Spoilers for the first four episodes below the jump!  All sorts of rambling ahead!  Please message me or reblog to share your thoughts, I wanna talk about it all!

I’ll try to organize things by episode.  I won’t be able to rewatch them until they go up on Apple TV so this is all off the cuff.  AHOY!

1x01 Little Homeschool

Steven has White, Blue and Yellow essences in his bathroom cupboard.  Maybe keep a bottle of your own spit just to be safe?  You never know? 

Aww Cherry Quartz is cute.  Did she actually get named? I assume that’s who that is.

I had thought that shot in the trailer was going to be Pink Smoky Quartz.   I was wrong, but then we DO get Pink Smoky Quartz next episode ahhhh!

We all know Steven drew that picture of himself and the Diamonds on the brochure.  

I like to think that Steven keeps up with his drawing during quiet times, and while he isn’t technically great, most 16-year-old artists aren’t great per se.  What’s important is that he keeps doing it and he’ll keep getting better!

Little Homeschool looks awesome and I want to go make some morps with Vidalia.  Wait, were Lapis and Peridot there? I don’t remember.  They should be!

I’m so glad Jasper isn’t the big bad!!! And I love that she’s just antisocial but not actively harming anyone (beetles and grass aside).  

Still no explanation for the blanket, I love it

STEVEN GO OFF, YOU TELL HER NOT TO HURT THAT BEETLE

Whoa Steven, that rage is juuuuust below the surface these days, isn’t it?  I get being annoyed at Jasper and I’m sure this isn’t the first time they’ve had this discussion but he really does just go off on her pretty damn quickly, and several times.

I am concerned that he referenced her corrupting herself.  I DON’T WANT CORRUPTED STEVEN Y’ALL, this better not be foreshadowing!!!!!

Honestly Jasper just needs to get into wrestling, I’m shocked Amethyst and Steven haven’t pointed this out to her

I’m dying at her attacking all the Earthlings in her little radius

Awww Steven, at first he’s really intrigued by Diamond Mode and wants to learn how to use it better.  So optimistic!

Except you totally killed about 10 conifers and only healed one, so way to hurt the forest dude

Am I the only one wondering how conflicted Dr. Maheswaren must feel, knowing Steven can heal all this crazy shit and that a) she’s toiling at doing it the old-fashioned way, b) he could really help her patients, and c) he isn’t?

Looking forward to seeing Steven and Jasper talk again, but I really hope it’s not because Steven’s been corrupted and is trying to get over it.  Urrrgh no ;_;

I do want to see if she has tips for how to control anger.  Or how to use it and learn from it.  But I’m not sure she knows either.

Steven is a shark.  Because if he’s not swimming, he’s sinking.  And swimming to him is helping people.  If he can’t do that, if he can’t do what he’s supposed to do in his mind, what is he doing?  He’s gonna sink this season and it’s gonna be FUCKING SPECTACULAR.

1x02 Guidance

Amethyst is so proud of herself!  It’s awesome!

Steven is clearly a little uncomfortable that he didn’t come up with the idea, isn’t he?  He also has a hard time figuring out that there are ways to use what you’re made for instead of having to run from it.  Of course, that isn’t true for everyone.  Little Larimar did love screams and children more than ice.  The best lesson is that people are different, some are comfortable working in a certain zone whereas others need to struggle past it to feel complete.

Amethyst was sitting in front of the Teens of Rage video game.  I FEEL THIS WILL BE SIGNIFICANT Y’ALL.

I’m just so glad Mr. Smiley finally isn’t understaffed. He could take a day off and go visit Mr. Frowny!

Uncle Andy is back!  Yay!  And he’s getting involved with Beach City in general, I’m really happy to see him putting down some roots.

Smoky Quartz is back!

PINK SMOKY HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THEM GO

Love love love the pink/purple asides for the Steven and Amethyst debate while being Smoky Quartz

TIME SLOWING/SUPER SPEED POWERS??? I WAS NOT PREPARED

The roller coaster exploded IN THE OCEAN I can’t EVEN

So far both Steven and Amethyst are intrigued and impressed by Diamond Mode, and sure, it seems harmless now... 

Steven is worried he’s losing his touch helping people.  That makes me worried that that’s part of a bigger feeling, not just this particular snafu.

Amethyst being so direct is often the one who gets closest to Steven talking about his feelings.  He started to go there, but then Little Larimar showed up again with their terrifying talk about screams....

1x03 Rose Buds

I’m really glad Greg and the Gems aren’t giving Steven shit about not wanting Rose to be looming over him in portrait form.  Now if y’all will also TALK to Steven about how he feels about it... but at least they’re okay with him removing the portrait.

HOOOOOOLY SHIT Y’ALL

I’m so happy J-10 and Y-6 are back!

OMFG they are NOT over Greg and it’s amazing

GAH-REG HOW COULD YOU

I’m glad the Zoomans are in control of their own destiny and able to go where they wish!  

no no no no no no no no no no we all know what’s coming here

Coming face to face with Rose Quartzes = instant KO for one Steven Universe

I almost had a panic attack with him as the Roses clustered around him and the music got tenser and tenser and the camera zoomed in on his face and that was fucking INTENSE PEOPLE

Greg seeing the Roses and just noping the fuck outta there, amazing, everyone in this family is so repressed

Poor Garnet and Pearl hiding in the bathroom

“Yeah, it’s weird”

Poor Rose Quartz-who-most-looks-like-our-Rose-Quartz, it’s clear she is much more emotionally in tune than the other two (due to her belly gem placement?)

STEVEN GOT NEW PAJAMAS

but let him sleep shirtless you cowards!

Also he just looked... so GROWNUP in that scene by the warp pad?  His proportions were just no longer little kidlike?  And he is still cutely beefy but not really little-kid chubby anymore and teen me would have had it BAD for him at this point, I’m just sayin’

Steven is S O O O O   S T R E S S E D   R I G H T   N O W

he’s eating his fucking blanket in an attempt to not talk about his problems I CAN’T

also HAVE WE NOTICED that Steven will eventually end up telling strangers at least some of what’s bothering him, but never the people who actually love and care about him

this episode was so damn tense it is masterful

I’m glad they managed to talk things out a little

but clearly Steven is still, as always, just scratching the surface, this poor kid just needs to GO OFF.

did he go pink in this one from stress for a second?  Or was that the next one? 

1x04 Volleyball

You cannot tell me that that white coat is not a hand-me-down from Dr. Maheswaren, it is CANON IN MY MIND

also damn how many Gems are cracking themselves right and left that this needs to happen regularly?

seriously though Steven, you might just want to get a spittoon and start sending one to every hospital ever, you would undo A LOT of human suffering....

Steven honey I’m so sorry your mom did you so wrong and I’m so sorry you’re so scared of everything to do with her and NONE OF IT IS YOUR FAULT OKAY

but maybe also you need to learn how to face some of this stuff so it doesn’t scare you so badly

Poor Pink Pearl!

Volleyball? Seriously Steven? so insensitive how do you know Pink didn’t throw a volleyball at her head

Poor Pearl and Volleyball feeling so jealous about each other

Volleyball is 8000 years old??  damn how old was Pink?

oooooooh the Reef!  so cool and mysterious!  Look at all those Pearl possibilities!

So Pink damaged her Pearl, and she sent her to the Reef for repair.  They fixed her gem, but when she reformed, the trauma was still so severe that she reformed with the crack.  Oh man :(

Now again I don’t want Corrupted Steven but you could probably wrangle that into support for the theory.

I prefer to think that Steven will do something different than straight-up Corruption to himself, but we could see something like the crack form instead of Corruption.

Willing himself into a monster form only works if he thinks of himself completely as a monster.  Right now he thinks Pink is the monster, and he thinks, finally, that he isn’t Pink.  So either he’d have to really hurt somebody and then view himself as a monster, or, my preference, he would develop something like a scar or pink eyes or stay pink all the time or something until he’s figured out his issues.

I JUST DON’T WANT HIM TO HAVE HORNS, YOU GUYS.

Pearl WAS protecting Volleyball from Steven oh NOOOOO

STEVEN SONIC SCREAM

So we’ve got Diamond Mode Strength, Super Speed, and Sonic Scream, man oh man oh man

this finally makes sense because all the other Diamonds have such well-developed offensive powers

Pink must have been like “no those are dangerous I don’t want them, what else can I do” and developed her healing powers secretly

I always wondered why the Diamonds never recognized Rose Quartz’s healing tears or shield as belonging to Pink

And it must be that she never showed it to them

They maybe only knew about her offensive powers

MEGA PEARL IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND WISE AND HER RIBBON DANCING IS SO MAGNIFICENT AND I LOVE THEM JUST TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER YOU TWO

I can’t believe we got a new fusion so quickly!!!!

Fuck that bitch Shell amirite

look, someone help Steven.

Please help Steven.

HELP. STEVEN.

No new trailer for next week???? COWARDS

omg someone please please scream about all this with me

[mydisenchantedeulogy]

Black Out Days [Part 2] Shade of Winter [Henry Bowers]

Winter was a delight, a simple change that was both ordinary and pleasing at the same time. Unmarked snow covered the grounds; had been setting all morning. Evelyn blocked the emergency doors behind the stage, looking out at the school yard – she learned from the drama teacher about this place; an escape were the alarm bell was taken out. Drawing in the smoke from her cigarette, the chilled teen released it with a gradual sigh.

Indeed a delight.

This particular afternoon was silent; a little too silent for a Tuesday in her opinion. Even after hours the school never really stayed quiet, not with committee members and staff running about. It was eerie how dead it was, but Evelyn chose to ignore it.

The swift, bitter wind on her face was just about the only noise she could hear. Up until something fell off the stage behind her and clattered noisily to the floor.  

The red haired teen shot a look over her shoulder, having to squint her eyes in order to see in the dim light. Something circular rolled along the floor towards her, moving steadily until she could finally see what the object was. A small canister of paint, it looked like. Evelyn let it come to her, not wanting to let the door close before she was done with her cigarette, and caught it with her foot. Ominously, the lip popped open and red paint leaked onto the floor.

“Damn it,” she hissed. Reaching down, she cleaned as much of it as she could with the lid, then popped it back on. As she was doing so, a girl skated around the corner and walked over to her, resting her hands on either side of her slender hips.

“What are you doing?”

Evelyn glanced up at her, wiping the remnants of paint off her middle and index finger onto her pants. “Cleaning up this mess. You knock this over?”

“By accident,” the frizzy haired brunette answered. Her name was Rita Anderson, a girl who Evelyn shared cleaning duties with. She was tolerable; only when she wasn’t tattling for brownie points. “But I wasn’t referring to the paint – I can see that. I was referring to the thing in your mouth.”

It’s a cigarette, she wanted to correct her. Instead, she took one last draw and stubbed out the cherry on the sole of her right flat – her red lipstick stained the butt. “It’s gone. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”

Rita scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Right … well before Mr. Peters sees this, you need to clean it up. I don’t want to report you for smoking, but I will if I have to.”

“That would benefit you, how?”

“It wouldn’t benefit me at all,” she snapped. “And neither would it benefit you. Smoking on school grounds will get you thrown in detention; Mr. Peters might even remove you from the drama committee. I’m sure you can see my concerns.”

Evelyn did; she saw them clearly. Reputation is everything. Still, she did as asked. Being thrown in detention would only get her in trouble with her foster parents. Tossing the butt outside into the snow, Evelyn let the door slam closed behind her and went searching for a mop. She figured the janitor – Marsh – would be the best bet.

As far as she knew, the basement was were the cleaning supplies were being kept; some closet she hoped wasn’t locked. Following the empty hall from the gymnasium, Evelyn went down the stairs and into the basement. Also part of the boiler room, the entire space was muggy and stank of damp, overturned earth. She tried not to breathe in the smell as she navigated around the dim space, searching for the storage closet, but it was hard; the smell was all around her.

“Hello … Mr. Marsh. Are you down here?”

No answer; she assumed as much. Huffing a sigh of annoyance, Evelyn wanted to circle around and forget about the mess, but a door marked with embossed letters caught her attention. Upon further inspection, it was the door she had been looking for.

“I’m taking a mop and bucket from the closet, but I’ll return it when I’m done,” the bored teen yelled. She was sure the janitor wasn’t in the room with her, but in case he was, her intentions were clear.

Then again, she may have been wrong. Someone was lingering in the darkness.

Before she grabbed the knob something rattled behind her. Evelyn glanced over her shoulder, seeing nothing but cluttered shelves of old supplies; staplers and boxes of plastic rulers. She returned to the task at hand, but an eerie feeling brought goosepimples to her arms. She felt like someone was watching her.

Ignoring it the best she could, the cautious teen pulled open the door and found the light switch – a beaded cord that hung from a single bulb on the ceiling. She gave it a tug, chasing away the darkness, but when she took her guard down, something from behind darted at her and rudely pushed her inside – the door clicked shut, trapping her.

Evelyn cried out in shock, having to catch herself from tumbling over into a box of foul smelling sweeper heads, but a hand roughly grabbed her upper arm and hauled her backwards.

“Try to scream, and yer dead. Understand?”

She recognized this voice; Henry Bowers. Her mind was reeling. But why? What did he want with her? Realization hit her like a tack hammer; she had an idea.

“Answer the question,” he ordered. The blond held her against him, arms draped around her waist and chest.

Evelyn nodded in agreement. She opted not to speak, however.

“Yer a hard one to catch,” Henry stated. “Been real eager to meet ya for a while; I think ya know why.”

Again, she nodded. “I do – I think – but understand it was not my intention to target you.”

“Intention or not, I got suspended for that bullshit. Have you any idea how many hours of counseling I have sit through?”

Can’t be any worse than mine, the annoyed teen assumed. She took a deep breath and tried to defuse the argument, knowing full well her attempt would be in vain. “I understand, but listen. What you were doing was inappropriate. Marsha wasn’t enjoying it as mu––

“What makes you think she wasn’t enjoying it?”    

Evelyn rolled her eyes in disbelief, but opted not to answer. How ignorant was he? Honestly, could he not hear the fear in poor Marsha’s voice? She asked him not to lay a hand on her. Sick fuck; probably got hard listening to her beg.

It will be a cold day in hell when I beg to this pervert.

Henry mistook her silence. His tongue flicked out to wet his bottom lip as he rocked her from side to side like some fucked up slow dance. “I see now. A little jealous, aren’t ya?”

This time Evelyn laughed. “Are you high? To believe something like that, you have to be high.”

He shook her a little too roughly. “Don’t lie to me.”

“Take it easy. You’re hurting me.” She wanted to elbow him in the chest for the unintentional squeeze he gave her, but chose not to on account of pissing him off more. The last thing she needed was to be locked in this closet with him as he pitched a fit.

Evelyn took a deep, needed breath. “This doesn’t have to end with an argument. We can settle this another way.”

“I plan to, babe.”

She meant to bargain with him; go the office and explain that she was misunderstood. Marsha wouldn’t appreciate it – Henry would almost certainly get his suspension revoked – but at this point, she honestly didn’t care. It was ignorant on her part telling on him, because she knew it would get back to him. Evelyn shouldn’t have been surprised that he took this as an indication to fuck her, but she did.

Specially after he turned her around and released her just to stare closely at her. Evelyn didn’t know what to think. She had never been looked at so intensely before. When she opened her mouth to question him, the obscene blond raised up his arm and pressed his thump against her fleshy painted lips.

She was beyond disgusted – there was no telling where his fingers had been – but this allegation slipped away whenever he leaned closer. Was he going to kiss her? Evelyn was intrigued.

Though, before anything could happen, the door came open and nearly hit Henry in the back.

“What are you two doing in there?”

Evelyn snapped out of her daze and moved under his arm, darting passed Mr. Marsh on her way out – careful not to show her face – and pushed her way up the stairs.

Fuck that! She was going home. Fuck Rita Anderson! She could mop the paint off the floor. And fuck Henry Bowers! No one had ever tied to kiss her before.

What a bust.  

[mouser26]

Nostrum

this story was prompt and helped along by my lovely friend Thes

If you want to write a scene, consider: Sedj having a Moment (first attempt at teen rebellion? Venting because he’s unhappy? Getting drunk and trying to score a one night stand to ignore his own trauma looming over him?) and when Madje says he’ll go get him, Sarake’d tells him to stay. He’ll get Sedj.

It’s the work of about 3 weeks which is honestly the longest I’ve stuck with a story in a long while. The title is defined as  “ a medicine, especially one that is not considered effective, prepared by an unqualified person.” Picked because I discovered Sedj comes with Two songs in this story Desire by Meg Myers and Antidote by Faith Marie

It’s Kinda a rough one so putting it under the cut.If you’re familiar with my beestrix characters you’ll know why, nothing graphic just mentions of past trama and poor coping.

The bar in question was the kind of middle ground one could only find on a space station, somewhere the high class could slum it with the common while those from below could get a taste of the better life.

Sedj irregardless stood out.

There was something desperate about the teen sitting at the bar. He was dressed with flash, a golden top with a plunging neckline that framed his chest rather than covering it drawing more attention to his pierced nipples and practically pooled in his lap which was scantly covered by his barely there holographic shorts. In the few minutes Sarake’d had been watching he had witnessed several men approach only to be shot down.

That was the biggest difference, more than the desperation, there was a meanness to Sedj the Bygon hadn’t witnessed before.

His rejections had fangs and a bite that coupled with his look came off as far more dismissive than needed.

If the teen looked the part of a peacock he had the attitude of a feral dog, snapping at every hand to come near him.

Making a decision Sarake’d strode over to where his middle son sat and took the empty seat on his left side.

The half-empty glass in front of Sedj indicated he had clearly been drinking but wasn’t drunk yet, the fact he turned his head obviously to check who had sat down spoke volumes as to how far gone he really was.

“What are you doing there?”

The teen tried to sound sharp but ended up sulky instead a child who knows their playtime is over.

“I’m thinking of getting a drink.” “You don’t drink you’re no fun like that.”

“I’m not here to be fun. I’m here to keep you safe and bring you home. When you’re ready.”

“Well I’m not ready.”

“Then I’ll have one of those cherry temples your brother loves.”

Huffing the teen turned his head back to surveying the room but now everyone was keeping their distance. The was a moment of inner dispute during which Sedj looked ready to charge after the men that had previously pursued him instead he grabbed his own drink and finished it off quickly before attempting to stand, “Fuck it lets just go.”

Shrugging Sarake’d followed behind the most dramatic of his boys a bit relieved force would not actually be needed this time, as he knew Madje often employed the over shoulder method to bring his brother home.

Annoyance fueled Sedj’s pace for the first few halls but as the drink he had finished sunk in he slowed, starting to sway. He gradually came to a stop leaning against the nearest wall with a soft sigh. “Aren’t you going to ask?” “Ask what?” “Ask why I was there! Why I wasn’t just jumping the first dick to hit on me! Fuck the first five dicks!”

Sarake'd would be lying if he said he didn't want to ask. Of course he did. What Sedj had done, running off by himself without telling anyone, had been dangerous. Before the boys had come into his life, Sarake'd had never had to worry about anyone but himself; now he worried all the time. He wanted to shake Sedj and demand to know what he'd been thinking.

Right now, though, that wasn't what Sedj needed.  He needed someone to care. The anger was a test. It was pain. It was whatever Sedj had been trying to drown in alcohol back at that bar without success.

Sarake'd eased a little closer and spoke, gently: "Do you want me to ask?"

The teen made a soft sound still leaning against the wall, it was so small if the Bygon hadn’t been close he might have missed it “...Please.”

"Okay." Sarake'd kept his voice soft. He leaned in, but didn't move to touch Sedj. "Why were you there?" A pause, and then a second, more important question: "What's wrong, dano' nei'man?"

Sedj tensed a moment before straightening, reaching up he roughly pulled his hair away from his face revealing the scars that crossed his blinded eye, Sarake’d had caught glimpses of the old injury but it had never been presented so bluntly. Work had clearly been done to restore appearances as there were only three distinct lines crossing the socket but the sunken skin made it clear there was nothing behind the sealed lid.

“Because I’m damaged.”

Despite the air of finality with which the words were said they were in in fact the breaking of the dam.

“I’m just a pretty face with a huge fucking flaw that makes me worth less. As long as I hide my scars I can have my pick of fucks, rough trade or the polished elite they all want me. They offer me drinks, credits, money, even just a good time and they are all so crushed when I say no because they don’t know better. If they knew about this they wouldn’t say shit. They’ll expect me to be grateful because who else could possibly want to look at an ugly thing like me?”

The anger and desperation turned to resignation and bitterness as the poison continued to spill from the teen’s lips.

He was shaking arms moving to grip each other hard enough to bruise as if it were the only thing keeping him together.

“They don’t actually want me and tonight I didn’t want them, I wanted them to want, and to be humiliated when trash like me still told them no.”

Sarake’d let out a harsh breath through his nose. His body language was rigid, antennae curled back, tails fanned out and twitching. He didn’t like hearing anyone insult his boys, even when it was them. “You aren’t trash. Anyone who doesn’t see how wonderful you are doesn’t deserve you.”

He slowly relaxed when he realized how he must look. He lowered himself down until he was nearly Sedj’s height and let his tails curl in and around him protectively. He held his arms out, loose and wide in invitation. “For what it’s worth, your brothers and I want you. All of you, just the way you are... no matter how much trouble you cause or how much you make me worry.”

Sedj made another soft sound this one more of a whimper as he moved away from the wall only to fall against the bygon’s shoulder, he softened even more as Sarake’d hesitantly wrapped am arm around his waist. The shaking lessened as Sarake’d’s free hand came up to stroke his hair soothingly, combing the tossled locks back into order though he had to work around the teen’s face being pressed to his shoulder.

Pressing into the contact even as he turned his head Sedj burst into tears.

His boys didn’t cry, or rather on the rare occasion they did they, Matteudj mostly, did so silently making hardly a sound and the minimum of tears.

This was nothing like that.

It was loud and ugly, messy even as the boy keened against his skin.

Gradually as the tears slowed Sedj let his own arms go in favor of wrapping them around Sarake’d in a tight hold as his cries quieted to soft sniffles.

Waiting a little longer to be sure the boy was truly done, Sakare’d shifted just enough that the teen was tucked to his side instead of dependent on the wall, his head still resting on his shoulder.

Letting out a shaky sigh Sedj made no attempt to pull away, “Sorry. Can we just go home now?”

“Can you walk?”

“Uh...”

Sarake’d couldn’t see the teen’s face but he could hear the puzzlement in the sound and feel him shift as he tested his balance, it still took a minute to receive a verdict.

“Not well?”

“Would you like a do’orada ride? Like your brother?”

Sedj might not have known what a do’orada was but he certainly understood reference to his younger brother . He nodded slowly and was mindful of the bygon’s tails as he moved to the man’s back and climbed on carefully.

As they resumed their walk the silent was fragile, not entirely comfortable after Sedj’s outburst. Sarake’d didn’t want to make light of anything the boy had disclosed but he did hope to perhaps give him a little cheer.

“I like your new jewelry.”

Sedj tensed in surprise but Sarake’d could feel his smile as he buried his face into the back of his shoulder. The teen’s outfit may have been all about flash but the trio of gold bees hanging from each of his piercings was a personal homage to his family, one only someone close would recognize. “Thank you.”

The two words spoke volumes.

[kyoko0001]

私に薬の主人を呼んではいけない Chapter 01

SMUT ALERT!! 

Fai doesn't think the term 'drug lord' is an accurate description for his line of work. Of course, it's hard to explain exactly what it is you do when you find out that your Tinder crush is a officer at the Tokyo police department. Modern Day AU. KuroFai. Mentions of other CLAMP ships here and there. Full list of warnings at the beginning of each chapter.

Chapter 01 available here or click the read more link! 

Fai Fluorite was on his third large, triple chocolate caramel latte with 2 shots of expresso, and he wasn't even half way though his night yet. He had two more clubs to visit and a meeting with his Guatemalan importer to get though before he had to head to the Neko no me Café and start the ovens.

It took every ounce of his self-motivation to eat the grilled cheese his assistant, Syaoran, had so kindly acquired for him. It was easy to ignore the food while he balanced the books of Fenikkusu though. The once familiar task took frustratingly long…

Normally this particular establishment ran smoothly, but with Oruha out on maternity leave he had to spend a maddening amount of time keeping things moving. Don't get him wrong, he was happy for her—she had been trying for a child for so long after all—and he wanted her to have as much time off as she needed.

But—

He would be much happier with her back in her office where she belonged. There was just no substitute for someone who had been running this club for him for the last 8 years. She knew this place better then him naturally.

"Please eat a few more bites Fai-sama." Syaoran was frowning at him from the other side of the ornate cherry wood desk and the blond tugged his cheeks into a too cheery smile as he looked up from his work.

"I swear I'll finish it." His tone was purposefully cheerful, but he didn't quite manage to bring the smile to his eyes.

His assistant didn't look as though he was buying it today, and he wasn't sure if he currently had the energy to tug the muscles in his face any tighter.

Syaoran gave a defeated sigh—He could be such a smart kid sometimes.

Fai had every intention of sticking to his usual diet of pure sugar, caffeine and various other stimulants for the rest of the night. He would probably eat some blueberries at the café… Toyo had mentioned that the last shipment was deliciously ripe.

Keeping his body running when he couldn't sleep more than three or four hours a night was a delicate balancing act. Carbs and fat would make him sluggish and he couldn't afford that so early in the night. He had probably already hit his calorie goal anyways with the sugar packed lattes.

A greasy grilled cheese wasn't going to do him any good. Even if it was from the little dinner across the street and one of his favorite foods.

"Can you go run to the backroom and grab the inventory list for me?" Fai looked back down at the spreadsheet he was updating. Better to keep Syaoran busy then letting him fret over silly things like his lunch.

The teen nodded and pulled the door open just wide enough to slip through. After a year of working as the blonde's assistant he knew when to take a hint, and left quickly to give his boss some space.

The loud sound of the music rushed into the quite office like a tsunami despite his efforts, causing the blond to scowl. As soon as the door swung closed again the noise faded back down to a more tolerable level and Fai stood while grabbing the now cold sandwich off the plate. He had a hot minute before Syaoran would return—but better safe than sorry… Fai headed towards the employee restroom for some extra privacy.

Locking the door, he tore sizable chunks of the sandwich off and tossed them in the toilet. Flushing away the evidence, he sighed and washed the greasy residue off his fingers and dried his hands quickly.

Now to the next line of business.

If he was going to get though the rest of this night, he was going to need a pick me up.

It had been that kind of week unfortunately.

Or rather… That kind of month…

Year?

The blond wasn't entirely sure.

Fai pulled his cell phone out of the inner pocket of his dark blue Brioni suit jacket and set it on the sink. Digging a little deeper he found what he was looking for—a dime bag with just enough 'help' to get him though the rest of the night.

Lazily, he tapped some of the powder onto the shining porcelain of the sink. With practiced grace he shaped two identical lines with his visa. The only cash he carried was for the soul purpose snorting his snow, and he made quick work of twirling up his lucky ¥10,000 note.

Two deep breaths later and Fai was tilting his head back and closed his eyes while he sucked in a few deep breaths. What little discomfort he felt was quickly forgotten and the blonde used a damp paper towel to wipe down the side of the sink and slid the baggie back into his inner breast pocket.

He would need to do a lot more to get any sort of rush—but those lines would serve to make him feel a little more human.

He had been doing this on and off for years—and though he was sure his body would thank him for a brake form the illicit substances—he couldn't deal with it now. There were too many things that needed his attention. This shit was way better then caffeine that was for sure.

Once he was feeling a little more like himself, he leaned against the porcelain counter top and unlocked his phone.

The second line of break business was making sure there was nothing urgent that needed his attention. His people had his cell and knew that he was available at all hours should they need him.

No urgent texts, so there was nothing that needed his immediate attention. One of his bouncers had needed a few stiches after breaking up a bar brawl and Fai set a reminder to take care of the doctor bills and send him a card.

Emails for this week's accounting were coming in and he would add them to the books while he waited for Yuukito and Touya to show up for their opening shift this morning…

He added that to his calendar as well and sighed before hitting the home button. Between meeting with the troublesome supplier, one of his managers being out, and trying to get the months end accounting done he was going to lose his mind.

Absentmindedly he opened Tinder and started looking though the messages he had been ignoring for the last few hours. Maybe a good lay would help relax him enough to actually be able to sleep tonight…

Fai didn't have high standards and he had probably slept with half the men in Tokyo by now. Well… Half the gay ones at least. The blonde didn't care what line of work they were in—what they were majoring in—if they were vegan—liked beer or whatever else hipsters drank these days—what exotic vacations they took.

He just wanted them tall, with a strong shoulders, a killer body, and big cock. He didn't do clingy, long term, or batshit ether.

Fai already had money, nice cars, and a big house. He didn't need someone to take care of him—just get him off. As long as their kinks weren't anything too crazy, Fai was usually down to party.

It was nearing 10. Not too late to arrange something if he moved his schedule around. The blond scrolled though his open chats with a frown…

To clingy—To skinny—to short—to nosey…

Honestly with over nine million people in Tokyo the options were pretty shitty.

Back to the drawing board…

Backing out he started to sift through pictures of singles.

He never bothered to read anyone's profile and he sent the same messages to all of his matches.

Currently out on the town.

Would love to meet for a drink if you're not busy?

He made sure to include a few kissy faces and heart eye emojis and switched back to his email. It was Friday night so chances were good someone might take him up on his offer. If he didn't get a response soon, he was going to have to keep an eye out in the next club for a tipsy Mr. Tall dark and handsome that wasn't too far gone to keep his cock up.

He preferred his partners to be sober. They were usually better at actually getting the job done when they weren't too drunk to see strait.

Fai sighed rather loudly as the first responses started trickling in and read though them with disinterest. A few busy—a few too-forward responses including images of rather unimpressive genitalia—and hello!

My shift ends in two hours.

Still going to be out?

What were his chances that the hot one worked late? Fai smirked and sent back a thumbs up.

Where we meeting?

The blonde checked his calendar. He would be at Kyuden.

This club was on the tamer side—it had only opened two years ago and had surprisingly attracted an older crowed. Business men and single 30 something's who had money frequented the joint.

To cater to the more mature taste they usually had live local bands, or comedians preforming. It suited a more distinguished crowed better than thumping music and flashing lights the university students enjoyed. Fai rather liked Kyuden for that reason. Yuto kept it well managed so he didn't have to visit often—but they were looking to remodel the VIP area and Fai needed to approve the budget.

More privet rooms were needed—and more discreet seating.

Fai not only made sure that they had the largest selection of top shelf liquor in all of Tokyo, but at this joint he also staffed an impressive array of ladies to cater to the single gentlemen's needs.

So—like most of his establishments—it was walking the line of not quite legal.

It was far from a gay bar—but it didn't chase that crowd off ether. The could fuck quick in dirty in one of the more privet booths—and Fai could see firsthand the issues with the current layout.

Kyuden?

He received a response almost immediately.

See you then.

Perfect.

Fai slipped his phone in his pocket and turned to look in the mirror. He splashed his face with cold water and toweled his hands dry before heading back out to the office. Syaoran—the sweet thing that he was—had returned with not only the ledgers but also what looked to be another coffee for him.

"Thanks, Syao." Fai winked at him and accepted the folder as well as the warm paper cup that smelled like heaven.

"No problem."

Hiring this kid was honestly one of the best decisions he had ever made. Syaoran had started out as one of Fai's 'boys.'

Syaoran was not cut out for moving goods though— but he had needed a job. Fai had taken pity on him and hired the kid as his assistant. It turned out that he was a hard worker and had good taste in coffee, so it worked out for both of them.

He always seemed to know when Fai needed a refill on his latte, a Redbull, or shot of tequila.

The blonde had been though a lot of assistants over the years—that particular skill was a rare talent that Fai greatly appreciated.

Poor thing had made the unfortunate mistake of getting his girlfriend pregnant when they were still in high school, and regrettably, he had been forced to drop out to support them. There little son Tsubasa was too cute and Fai had a soft spot for kids. Syaoran was an honorable little knuckle head—so Fai had also hired his honey to work at his café during the day as a server.

Sakura was ditzy and clumsy, but she made up for that with her kind heart.

The blond sat back down in front of his macbook to focus on what he was supposed to be doing in the first place. His little hit early was doing its job and he powered though the last of the book keeping faster than originally planned.

They had made a profit. He always did—but the numbers were still lower than they had been before Oruha had left a month ago. It wasn't as though the staff had forgotten how to do their jobs—they were simply slacking since there manager was not there to ride them on their duties.

It peeved him… But made him appreciate the hard work of his managers. He wouldn't be able to run his business if it wasn't for their hard work… He couldn't do this for each one of his 22 clubs. Even if he never slept, he wouldn't have enough time to oversee all of the little details.

The blonde made a note to give each one of the managers a bonus. Keeping them happy and right where they were was paramount to making sure no additional responsibilities feel onto his plate.

Fai felt his eyes getting heavy again, his concentration didn't last long. He managed to discreetly excuse himself to the bathroom again and took another bump before he and Syaoran headed out to meet the distributer.

His McLaren 570s was in the parking garage across the street in his reserved spot. Syaoran rode shot gun and Fai put the top down as they pulled out onto the busy street.

Tokyo always had traffic—and after navigating those packed streets for 18 years—he knew the quickest ways to get around town.

They were meeting at one of his warehouses in the industrial district. As soon as they exited downtown, the traffic thankfully died down enough to actually feel some wind in their hair as he cruised the artificially lit streets in a comfortable silence. He pulled up with time to spare and double parked in front of the building.

During the day this place served as a clothing Wearhouse. Fai owned the property and rented it out to some exporter who sold cheap clothing online to rich foreigners. They got the space for cheap and Fai used it after hours for his own needs.

It worked out perfectly as a place to transfer goods, and as far as his intel went, the police had no idea. He switched it up every few weeks whether they were suspicious or not though. He hadn't had a meeting in this particular building in a little over a year.

Two of his enforcers were already waiting for him. Syaoran followed close behind him as they got out of the car and slowly approached Kusanagi and Seshiro. Both were dressed in their usual uniform. Black skin-tight tee and black jeans that served to make their muscles look even more impressive.

Too bad both men were spoken for. Seshiro was currently engaged to one of Fai's managers and Kusanagi had himself a cute little wife at home.

"Evening Sir." The men said in unison and Fai grinned at them.

"Have our guests arrived?"

He didn't expect any trouble. Even outside of Japan the exporters he worked with knew what happened when you crossed him.

If they tried it? Well the night would be a little interesting then now wouldn't it?

"No sir. Fuuma is with them in rout. Traffic." Seshiro returned his smile before opening the door to the Wearhouse.

That was all good and well. Fai could live without being the one fashionably late this time.

The blonde entered with his assistant following close behind him. They made themselves comfortable in one of the offices and waited. Syaoran made some tea and Fai checked his phone.

Kanoe, the manager of Kurōbā had texted him to inform him that one of the bartenders had quite mid shift. They were handling it for now but were going to need to get a decent replacement asap to handle the 4th floor bar.

He had a few promising resumes waiting for a spot, so Fai sent back a text that she needed to set up a meeting with him to go over them to find a suitable replacement. He accepted the meeting request that came in moments later.

Tomorrow at 5pm was early for him… but if she was short staffed, he could do it. Okoku brought in a good amount of money for him and if they had to shut down an entire floor, his pocket book would notice.

Now that that was settled Fai moved on to the next line of business… He opened a text from his step dad praying that it wasn't bad news.

It wasn't that he didn't get along with Taishukuten—not now that he was an adult at least. They just didn't talk unless it was about Ashura. If his stepdad hadn't married Fai's adoptive father, and had simply remained his law partner? Fai would probably avoid him.

After stepping in as a step parent and being put though the ringer by both he and his twin from the time they were first going through the emotional, hormonal, train wreck that was middle school? The feeling of polite annoyance was mutual.

Needless to say—the only time he got a message from the man was when something was wrong.

A picture of his father and… a cat?

Awe.

They had gone out.

How sweet.

Fai sent back a few hearts. He couldn't tell where they were from the background, but he was glad that Taishakuten had gotten Ashura out of the house. Since the accident his adoptive father had a tendency to stay cooped up in doors more often than not.

Fai saved the photo to his phone and set it as his wall paper. There were too few happy moments in his life recently. He like to have reminders of why he did all of this garbage to begin with.

Tapping the home button, he smiled at the new photo one more time before checking his tinder messages. Nothing else from—oh what was his name?

Kurogane?

Well at least his name matched his serious profile picture.

Fai looked through the few photo's the man had attached to his profile and smirked. He hoped Kurogane was as handsome in person as he was in these pictures.

One of him wearing a traditional Hakama was particularly charming. He must be into some sort of martial art—which hopefully meant he was in wonderful shape.

Fai smirked thinking about taking body shots off a well-toned stomach… Maybe this Kuro would be up for some less traditional fun tonight. It might not be the best idea seeing as he would still have work to finish tonight… but it was tempting.

If they clicked Fai thought he might chance an evening off to have some much-needed naughty relaxation in an actual bed. Maybe a ritzy hotel with a jacuzzi and bottle service in the room?

He could tie Kuro-hottie to the headboard and lick whip cream off his most sensitive areas?

"Is something wrong Fai-sama?" Syaoran came back into the office carrying a small tray with two cups of steaming tea—green tea of course—and pulled him out of his fantasies.

"No. I decided to meet someone tonight at Kyuden for a drink." Fai turned the phone so that Syaoran could see the photo of Kuro in his sexy hakama. "Cute ne?"

"If you say so Fai-sama." Syaoran laughed awkwardly and the blonde found himself chuckling.

This poor kid knew way too much about his sex life… Fai was severely allergic to long term commitment but had an obnoxious need for human contact. This caused and interesting predicament that played out in a near constant steam of short flings and one-night stands.

In the last 10 years his longest relationship had lasted a whopping 4 months and ended with him leaving his date at fancy eatery in Paris when they had dropped the L-bomb.

"If you wanted to call it an early night, I wouldn't be mad. I'll have Kusanagi give you a ride home after we finish up here?" The blonde offered with an innocent smile.

As much as he loved having his assistant to vet his phone calls and get him lattes, he didn't need the poor thing waiting around while he got plowed in a semi-privet booth by his date.

He paid him handsomely—but not enough for that.

"Yeah. The baby has a cold and I know Sakura-chan is exhausted from staying up with him." Fai frowned at that. It was that time of year he supposed… But why hadn't Syaoran mentioned it earlier?

"Why don't you have Sakura take the day off tomorrow too? I'll toss her an extra vacation day, so you guys can all take a day to rest." Fai was always lenient when it came to things like this. Surely Syaoran knew all he needed to do was ask and his boss would send him home?

"Are you sure that's ok Fai-sama?" the brunet didn't like to accept charity—the fact that he didn't out right refuse showed just how stressful having sick baby really was. He couldn't relate—probably would never have children—but he had spent enough time around their little tot at the café to know he was a handful when he felt under the weather.

"Yes." Fai confirmed.

Before his assistant had a chance to say anything further Seshiro knocked on the door of the office. Fai sipped his tea as he entered into the cramped room and closed the door behind himself.

Looking out the large window that overlooked the main floor Fai could see that the new distributer was waiting very patiently for them. He had brought a man and a woman with him—it wasn't unusual—normally distributers were accompanied by bodyguards like Fai's enforcers—but not always.

It was ether a show of faith.

Or over confidence.

Only time would tell.

"Are you ready Sir?" Seshiro didn't seem overly concerned.

Must not have found anything alarming on them during the pat down.

Wordlessly Fai stood, and they made their way out of the office. Fai had pulled a serene, emotionless mask onto his face and walked with Syaoran and Seshiro behind him, head held high, eyes blasé.

This was a well-choreographed dance. He had a reputation to maintain after all. It had taken a few years to prefect this particular act, but it had served him well so far.

He wasn't Fai Fluorite—the friendly neighborhood drug ring leader. He was Fai Fluorite—the slightly off his rocker, smiley psychopath that wouldn't think twice about ordering a hit on you or your entire family if you crossed him.

Once he was just close enough to see the individual hairs on the man's head, he offered a pleasant smile. "Its nice to meet you in person Mr. Reed."

Fei Wang Reed did not seem pleased to see Fai. This meeting was to set boundaries after all—and no one liked to be scolded.

"The pleasure is all mine, Mr. Fluorite." Fai could tell that he was forcing a calm tone as he spoke—he could see the anger in his eyes.

Good.

He may have just climbed to the top of the food chain in South America—but he was in Fai's house now.

His guests had to play by the rules.

His rules.

Tokyo was a big market after all. Sure—finding a new supplier for coke would be annoying. The stuff he had gotten from Fei Wang Reed's predecessor had been top grade, and Fai's boys had been able to cut and move the stuff faster than he could import it.

This last shipment? Low quality and full of cheap and slightly hazardous additives.

Since Cocaine was the drug of choice of his most wealthy clientele—he was not happy.

He was a drug lord sure—but he wasn't going to lower his standards and start selling low quality, possibly harmful shit to his customers just because he had gotten ripped off. He had built his business on his integrity after all.

"I'm trust you received my return shipment?" Fai made sure that his face was a perfect expression of disinterest. His tone apathetic.

Fai had sent the cheap shit back, along with an invitation to discuss their future business relationship.

"I apologize for the misunderstanding." Reed offered. He didn't shift under Fai's gaze.

He was a ballsy one alright.

Ballsy enough to send a response stating that they had tried to provide him with a service by sending him 'precut' product so that he would be able to get it to his customers sooner.

Right.

"And I trust that you have ensured this shipment is what were accustomed to receiving form your office?" If it wasn't, Fai was going to have to teach him a lesson… He would very much prefer that Fei Wang Reed followed his warnings.

"See for yourself." Reed tilted his head to Kusanagi who held out a small sample baggy to Fai.

He had been doing this a long time—and had picked up a few tricks over the years. The first rule of dealing with someone like Fei Wang Reed was assuming they were trying to off you.

It was pretty much the ultimate goal in the business he was in. Currently Fai was the ring leader of the drug trade in the Tokyo metropolitan aria—taking him out would be a big step up for someone like Reed. The respect he would earn from accomplishing such a task would be more them enough to ensure at least a few years of control.

"Syaoran. Please bring that table over here." The blonde motioned to one of the folding tables that was set up against the far wall. Reeds eyes narrowed—no doubt offended—but the blonde didn't care.

His assistant complied quickly. Fai dumped half the powder on to the table and used his Palladium Visa to slide it into one long line. Fai fished out his lucky ¥10,000 note and made quick work of rolling it up and handing it to Fei Wang Reed.

"Cheers!" Fai chimed.

Reed was glaring daggers at him as he accepted the note. Fai didn't buy for one second that this man didn't sample his own products—so he was ether seriously offended—or about to snort his own poison.

He bent, and Fai watched him finish the line in one go before straitening and tipping his head back—snuffing his nose loudly.

So that was a no on the poison then…

Fai pinched the edges of the dime bag between his index finger and thumb forcing the plastic to pucker open. It smelled fine… looked good… apparently not laced with poison…

Fei Wang Reed had apparently come here in the hopes of saving a client. For now, at least.

"Much better than the last shipment." Fai offered, but Reed continued scowling at him.

He would buy enough from the man to smooth his ego over the next year no doubt. Business was business after all. Nothing soothed a bruised ego like regular orders totaling over 50 thousand dollars.

"I am glad that it is up to your standards." Fei Wang Reed managed to keep his tone even, but the blonde could tell that he was seething.

"Yes. Sorry to drag you all the way out to Tokyo for this meeting. I'm sure you understand the importance that were on the same page however." Fai turned and started to walk towards the entrance of the warehouse. "Fuuma will take you to your hotel room. We should grab dinner before you head home."

Reed didn't answer, and Fai didn't look back to see his look of annoyance as he strolled casually out of the building. Seshiro and Fuuma would be keeping a close eye on him for the remainder of his stay.

Kusanagi and Syaoran followed after him. As soon as the door closed Fai heard his assistant let out the breath he had been holding. Even after 6 months he still wasn't used to the tense situations that came with negotiating price and purity.

Poor kid.

Kusanagi had joined him after he had left the military and was not so easily shaken. He placed a reassuring hand on the teens shoulder as soon as they were out of the building. "Once Fai gets outta here I'll take ya home. Give your nerves a brake."

Fai smiled kindly at both of them and checked the time. "Have a good night you two. I'll see you both soon ok?"

"You heading straight to Kyuden then?" Syaoran grabbed his bag out of the passenger seat of his boss's car. He dug out a small can that he offered to the blond.

Just what he needed—more caffeine.

Fai accepted the red bull. He opened the can and sipped it before answering. "Then to Akai Shiro and finally Neko no me Café."

"Please make sure to go home and rest Fai-sama." Syaoran's face was worried as Fai finished off the last of the energy drink and crumpled the can in between his hands before tossing it in a nearby garbage bin.

"I will."

He wouldn't.

Fai wasn't jittery—he existed in a state of perpetual exhaustion these days. His insomnia didn't seem to think he needed any sleep between working 18-20 hours at a time though. He would probably just go home and toss and turn between short naps.

He refused to admit that his poor diet, lack of exercise, coke habit, and the excessive amounts of caffeine he consumed on a regular basis had anything to do with it.

Hopefully Kuro-handsome would tire him out though.

Fai got into his car and backed out of the parking lot slowly. It was almost midnight and the lateness of the hour did nothing to unclog the constantly overcrowded streets.

The drive was tedious, but Fai didn't mind. He did his best thinking when he was stuck in traffic anyways. He ended up putting the top back up on the Mclaren and blasting the music.

There was a lot for him to think about. The café was doing well for only being open for a year—and a food critic was going to by tomorrow to write an article about them. He had to do the prep work for Toya so he could really wow him or her.

The good press might bring in enough new clients to fund the opening of a second café… Yuuko, his personal attorney and impromptu life coach, had warned him to keep the funds for the Neko no me Café completely separate from the rest of his affairs, as it was the only joint that had nothing shady going on.

He was building his safety net should things go south with his more lucrative clubs.

In reality he was hoping that he could eventually manage his expenses with the café's profits alone and sell off the riskier side of his business to be done with the madness of it all. The novelty had worn off years ago and he was getting to old to deal with the constant power struggles, and import/distribution issues anymore.

It was affecting his mental health drastically.

His family was starting to notice… Ask questions… it was all becoming so terribly complicated.

When he had first dropped out of college to deal, he had resigned himself to the fact that he would probably end up this way. Even the best of them did. It was a hard field to be in… But he couldn't help hoping that maybe there could be more to his life then working 100-hour weeks.

Fai sighed loudly as he pulled in front of Kyuden and tossed the key fob at the bouncer. There was no line outside the door like most of the clubs he owned—Kyuden was slower. There VIP tables were booked up most nights though and even with less foot traffic, Yuto pulled in a nice profit for him.

They sold more skin then booze here.

The blonde pushed the heavy wooden door open and smiled kindly at the hostess who greeted him. She knew who he was. They all did.

"I have someone important meeting me here for a drink soon. His name is Kurogane. I'll be at my usual table." Fai flashed her the profile picture and she gave him a knowing smile and nodded—making a note of his name on her list.

With that taken care of Fai headed in through to the main bar and headed straight up the stairs to the balconied VIP section. Yuto had been behind the bar mixing drinks for an older couple but nodded his acknowledgement before continuing what he was doing.

The most privet booth had been reserved for him when he had announced that he would be stopping by to talk budgets tonight. It worked well for a privet conversation about finances, as well as some hot and haughty alone time with his date.

Hopefully he wasn't shy.

Fai took out his phone and sent a quick message to Kuro-muscles.

I got us a booth.

Let the hostess know you're here to meet me.

she will bring you back.

While he waited Fai ordered a black coffee and stood to refamiliarize himself with the layout of the upper level of the club. There wasn't much unused space to work with… but they could probably move some things around to suit the guests needs better.

As it was—most of the tables had a wonderful view of the stage down below—but no view of the other patrons. That seating was rather limited however… only so much room.

The blond rubbed his temples and checked his phone again.

Be there in 5.

Fai finished of his coffee and double checked his appearance in front facing camera of his phone. The waitress swung by and collected the empty mug and left two drink menus in its place—and he was left watching the entrance of the club impatiently.

True to his word. Kuro-sexy arrived in five-ish minutes.

Dear god was he tall.

Kurogane towered over the hostess who had been just a few inches shorten then himself in her heels. He looked uninterested as she flashed him a flirtatious smile and Fai was left smirking as he followed her though the main bar and up the stairs.

He made himself look busy by checking his phone as they made the rest of the trip to the far end of the VIP section. He could hear his heavy footfalls as they approached but didn't look up from what he was doing just yet.

He didn't want to look thirsty—even if he was.

Kuro-hunk didn't need to know how desperate he was. It would probably be a huge turn off.

"Here you are sir. The waitress will be by shortly to take your order." As they were trained to do, the hostess bowed deeply and Kurogane thanked her before sliding into the circular booth next to the blond, Leaving a respectful amount of space between them.

She left them be, and only then did Fai look up from his phone to flash his most dazzling smile. "Thanks for agreeing to meet me on such short notice."

"Yeah." Kurogane was looking him over carefully and Fai just continued to smile. He knew he was exotic looking compared to your average person here. He had been born overseas after all.

Maybe Kuro-broad had a fetish for blondes?

"Something wrong?" He kept his voice purposefully sweet and tilted his head slightly to the side.

"Not really. You normally dress like that?" The raven-haired man's voice was deep. Wonderfully deep.

Fai glanced down at his outfit. Yes—yes, he did. He was almost always dressed in a three-piece suit.

"Work cloths." He confirmed and Kurogane nodded. Still watching him with piecing crimson eyes.

Fai hadn't noticed his eyes in his profile picture, but they were stunning.

There was another long silence between them and Fai was starting to wonder if something was amiss? Something in his teeth?

He was hot, but for Christ sake. You would think he had sprouted a second head with the way Kurogane was scrutinizing him.

"I don't mean to be rude—" the tanned man finally spoke. "—and don't get me wrong I think you're… You're fucking beautiful. But why the fuck are you, of all people on a hookup app?"

Oh?

Fai smiled. That was not the first time he had been asked this on a date before. Especially if they saw him pull up in one of his expensive cars—or when he ordered the most expensive menu items.

He made a point not to allude to being well off financially before he met someone the first time. It attracted the wrong crowd.

"Trying to find out what's wrong with me?" the blond gave a mischievous smirk, his nose wrinkling with amusement at the younger man's words.

"Tch. Pretty fucking much." Kurogane finally glanced over the menu and Fai shook his head slowly.

Such a potty mouth.

"I'm an emotional wreck who works 80+ hour weeks and I'm in desperate need of a good orgasm for my sanity." Fai deadpanned, and those crimson eyes locked with his own.

He saw the younger man's ears tinge red at his directness.

Ugh. How freaking cute.

"What about you Kuro-handsome… Why is someone so—" Fai gestured vaguely in the man's general direction and smirked. "—surely you must have gentlemen such as myself—well you know." The blond winked, and the blush spread to the taller man's cheeks.

Oh god. Why was he so cute?

"Same, minus the emotional wreck part. I moved here and I'm working late shifts so it's hard to meet people… And my name is Kurogane." Kuro-proper set the menu aside and the waitress took that as her que to interrupt them for their order.

"Let Yuto know I'll have his recommended scotch. Neat please—" Fai looked at his companion and cooed. "And this handsome gentleman here will have—?"

The red spread further on his cheeks still and he swore he saw Kurogane's eyebrow twitch. "Masumi sake."

The woman nodded politely—used to Fai's flirtatious behavior with his 'guests.' She retreated to retrieve their drinks leaving him to continue to smile at the seemingly grumpy man if front of him.

"So, you just moved to Tokyo?" Fai said to break the silence.

Normally there was a hand down his pants by now and a few hikies on his neck. It seemed as though his companion was ether shy, or unhappy about something.

That was ok—he knew he had a tendency to intimidate people—younger men especially. They could chitchat till Kuro-cutie was comfortable.

"I moved here about a month ago from a smaller town just outside of Tokyo." Kurogane seemed to settle from his earlier embarrassment. He was still handsome even when he wasn't trying to hide his awkwardness, so Fai wouldn't complain.

"I see. And how do you like it so far?" Fai had met more than a few new arrivals to Tokyo since had started whoring his way through Tinder almost two years ago. A few university students—some art enthusiasts—young business man—they all had their reasons.

"I hate it. The rents expensive and there are way too many people. Its dirty and its always loud." Fai blinked a few times.

He wasn't wrong.

The blonde chuckled at that answer though. Kurogane really was no nonsense and Fai liked it.

"So, what brought you to Tokyo then if you dislike it so much?" The blonde had lived here his entire life, so he was used to the hustle and bustle of big city life—he knew it was off putting to some.

"Work. I'm hoping I don't have to stay for long." Well that was that Fai supposed—Tokyo wasn't for everyone—and it meant that Kuro-cranky wasn't looking for love.

Excellent.

"You have an accent. Were you born here?" Kurogane asked when Fai didn't immediately respond to his earlier statement. He was staring at his body again—the blonde's suit was well tailored but in the darkness of the room it would be hard to tell what he had going on under the layers of fabric.

"No. I was born overseas. My father adopted me when I was little. This has been my home for the last 29 years."

A lot had happened in 29 years…

"Shit. How old are you?"

Fai was sure that out of the sparse information that he had included on his profile he had at least provided the fact that he was into boys and his age… that's all the information there was about him…

"I'm 33."

"Damn. I thought that was a typo. You sure as hell don't look 33." It was Fai's turn to laugh uncomfortably.

He was fine with an age gap for something like this. They were both consenting adults—and seemingly attracted to each other. Anyway, he actually preferred his partners younger then himself. He would rather play the roll of sugar daddy vs. sugar baby with the people he dated.

No matter how casual the relationship, or who toped whom.

"I'll take that as a compliment I suppose."

Kurogane's checks flushed again and he scrubbed at his face roughly with both of his hands.

"—I didn't mean— you're fine. I didn't mean to make you think there was anything wrong with that. It ah—just surprised me is all." Those crimson eyes fell to stare at his tanned hands and Fai tried not to grin too widely.

Kuro-shy was adorable. He shouldn't tease him too badly else he may scare him off.

"You've never done anything like this before have you?" the blonde chanced reaching his hand out to place it over the younger mans in an attempt to comfort him.

He didn't flinch at the platonic touch. That was good right?

"This is the first time I've actually met someone off tinder in person." Kurogane admitted.

No wonder he was so nervous.

"Well there is a first time for everything. We aren't going to do anything you don't 100% agree to. We can just have a drink and talk if you want?" Fai really wanted to get his clothes off and ride his dick until he saw stars. But only if Kurogane wanted to pound him till he couldn't walk right.

Fai had enough people trying to get in his pants without having to pressure his date into sex.

"Its not… Fuck. It's not like that ok?" the raven-haired man seemed to get even more flustered and Fai's amusement tuned to confusion.

What the hell was it then?

Tonight was not supposed to be this complicated.

"I'm not some sniffling virgin-" Kurogane locked eyes with Fai and glared hard. "You're just… not what I'm used to. That's not a bad thing I just don't… want to do the wrong thing."

"Oh." Fai said.

Not what he was expecting? What was he expecting then?

"Are you pleasantly surprised or moderately disappointed Kuro-muscle?" Fai offered in a teasing tone as the waitress brought there drinks back to them. Fai thanked her for the both of them and took a nice log sip of his scotch.

"Both. You're hot as fuck but annoying as hell. And my name is Kurogane." His companion sipped his sake and watched Fai with sharp eyes.

"Whaa? Kuro-meanie thinks I'm annoying? I was only concerned for your feelings…" he said a little too loudly in a whining pout.

"Are you some kind of idiot or something? Ku-ro-ga-ne." those red eyes were glaring sharper still and Fai chuckled. They were almost sharp enough to cut paper.

It shouldn't be so much fun to get a rise out of him.

"Kuro-tan?"

"Kuro-gane. It's not that hard." His eyebrow was twitching now, and Fai had to bite the inside of his cheek to hold back his grin.

"Kuro-pii?" the blond said innocently and sipped his drink again.

"Jesus Christ…" the younger man rubbed at his temple. "Say it with me. Kuro—"

"Kuro—" Fai chimed happily.

"—Gane." He repeated the second half of his name slowly. "Kuro—gane." Spoken with extra emphasis on the 'gane' part.

"Kuro-myuu?" Fai offered. He swore he could see a bit of his dates soul die as those words left his lips.

"Fuck me…." Kurogane was looking at him in disbelief. The blond wasn't sure if he actually thought him incapable of speaking his name properly, or if he knew the older man was pushing his buttons on purpose.

The fact that it was hard to tell was gloriously amusing.

Had no one ever teased this poor guy in his life? Fai was having far too much fun doing it now.

"Gladly." He made sure to keep his expression as neutral as possible while the younger man's face flushed beat red.

"Shut up!" Kuro-bashful huffed and looked away and Fai raised a single, impeccably manicured eyebrow at him. "You're a fucking weirdo you know that! That's what's wrong with you!"

Fai simply sipped his scotch and swished the earthy liquid around in his mouth, before swallowing it.

There was way more wrong with him then they had time to discuss—so he settled for continuing to tease his new friend mercilessly.

"I think I know what you meant by me not being what you expected."

Those red eyes flashed back to look over at him again and the blond gave a devilish smirk.

He thought about what he was going to say next carefully. He wanted to see those tanned cheeks blush dark enough that Kurogane looked like a delectably embarrassed tomato.

"You saw my picture and imagined a shy little blonde foreigner clinging onto you and blushing like a meek little bottom didn't know?" Fai always attracted that type.

He could play innocent if he was feeling it—but he had done things that would make your mother roll in her grave.

Kurogane seemed suddenly petrified by Fai's words as he continued to speak in a singsong tone. "Then you met me and realized I'm older then you and more experienced. I'm definitely not meek—I am not the one who has been blushing tonight—and you start to wonder how things would work out if we had sex right?"

Kurogane remained silent and Fai leaned in close enough to whisper hotly in his ear. "You're totally freaked out that your aroused right now—even though it might mean taking it up the ass from a pretty blond foreigner. Right Kuro-honey?"

"Shut—Shut up." Kuro-manly pushed Fai roughly away and the blond burst into a fit of giggles.

It was so much fun teasing Kurogane that it should be illegal…

"I don't see what's so fucking funny here blondie." The look of pure shame induced hatred was just too much and Fai covered his mouth with one of his hands in an attempt to get himself under control.

"I'm right aren't I?"

"I swear to god blondie if you don't shut the fuck up right now, I'm going to make you regret it."

Fai took another sip of his liquor. The distinct harsh taste helped distract him as he tried to think of what could put his potential lover at ease. When the last of the giggles had wiggled free of his throat, he slid closer to Kuro-baby again, so that their thighs were touching.

"I'm flattered that you think I'm so attractive you would let me fuck you Kuro-sexy." Fai drew out his words seductively and nipped at his junior's neck playfully. "But I have never had any desire to top anyone—definitely not someone as—" Fai sucked slowly on his neck this time. "—impressively tall and broad as yourself."

Kurogane shivered. Fai didn't know if was from sheer arousal or relief at knowing he wouldn't being trying anything too different tonight. Both were likely seeing the massive hard on bulging rather obviously in the man's jeans.

"I could perhaps be convinced to bend you the table and make you my bitch—But only if you beg me of course." Fai added as he looked up at Kurogane though heavy lashes.

"You're a fucking bastard you know what?" Fai yelped as he felt a muscular arm slide around his waist and pulled him close so that he was pressed firmly against Kurogane's hot body.

God he was big.

"You're not the first to tell me. It's not a secret." Fai sighed as his date ran a hand all the way up his side—applying just enough pressure to tickle through the layers of fabric—right to his neck, callused fingers brushing the sensitive skin in a surprisingly gentle manner.

Kurogane used his free hand to sip his sake and Fai was suddenly aware of just how horny he really was from just those chaste touches.

He hoped he didn't embarrass himself…

The waitress returned with a tray carrying another neat scotch and Masumi sake. She set both of them on the table—along with a suspicious number of napkins—and pulled the curtain that covered the entrance of the booth closed.

Kurogane looked confused and Fai used the opportunity to crawl into his lap—swinging his leg into position so that he and his date were nose to nose.

Fai didn't want to explain to him why there were privacy curtains on the booths—or that the waitress had closed the curtain because there flirting was probably catching other patron's attention. That would just ruin the mood.

Instead he closed the distance between their lips and kissed him sweetly. Fai would let Kurogane take the lead for how he wanted this to go. If that would make his lover more comfortable, Fai would roll with it. he relaxed into the taller man's chest and simply enjoyed as his senses as took his partner in.

Kuro-koi was warm. His skin felt hot against Fai's chilly fingers as he trailed them up and down his strong arms. He smelled clean—like aftershave and fresh laundry—and his lips were flavored with the sake he had been sipping.

All in all, he was intoxicating.

Kurogane seemed to get the picture and brought one hand up to tangle in the blonde's soft hair and used the other to lift his ass and scooch their bodies even closer, so that the smaller of the two had to crane his neck to keep their lips connected in the heated smooch.

Fai couldn't help the soft sighs he was making as Kuro-chi massaged his scalp and ran his fingers though his short locks while they kissed. The younger seemed to notice his fondness for that particular action and so continued to so even after their kiss broke.

The hand that had previously been on his ass started to loosen Fai's tie and the smaller man was biting his bottom lip while he watched Kurogane pull the decorative fabric fee and let it hang around his shoulders loosely. Next was the vest—but this required two hands—and Fai gave a disappointed whine as the he worked the layers of his clothing free.

Fai shivered from a combination of cool air of the room touching his previously covered skin, and his lover's hot hands ghosting over the sensitive flesh as he slowly worked the buttons of his dress shirt free.

His gaze had stayed transfixed on Kurogane's hands while they finished their task. The blonde considered what those hands would look like rubbing up and down his chest, and over the sensitive skin if his thighs.

An involuntary soft moan escaped his lips and he closed his eyes to picture it further as the younger continued to carefully undo each and every button with care. Fai didn't know it was because his hands were so big that he had a hard time with the little buttons—or if he was savoring the moment.

He didn't care ether way. He was enjoying himself.

Eventually the last button came free and Fai heard Kurogane growl as all three layers of his clothing were push off his small frame at once. Suit coat, vest, and dress shirt sliding to the floor underneath the table, forgotten.

"Shit." Kurogane leaned back and looked down at him. Fai was panting as he was observed though half lidded, hungry crimson eyes.

"Shit." he repeated as those hot hands were hesitantly placed on either side of the blonde's torso—just above the hem of his pants—and Kurogane bit his lip as he slowly ran them up and his naked skin, leaving goose flesh in his wake.

"Thank you?" Fai smiled at him and Kuro-swear at least had the decency to look slightly embarrassed at his language.

"Beautiful." He corrected, and it was Fai's turn to flush.

He had been called beautiful before—usually by woman with perhaps a handful of men offering those words to him—but never in the middle of sex with a Greek god of a man looking at his body like he was thanksgiving dinner.

Fai shuttered and closed his eyes. His entire body was feeling hot—he wasn't used to his skin being this sensitive but the raven haired man's feather light touches were driving him crazy.

He couldn't remember the last time he had had sex this good—and they hadn't even gotten to the actual fucking part yet.

This was not his usual quick and dirty hook up he got off tinder, and he didn't know if that was a good thing or not. Normal there was a few minutes of sloppy kissing before Fai got pushed against a wall, or bent over a table, and fucked hard and fast. Occasionally it ended with him getting sucked off if he needed a little extra help to finish…

No one had ever freaking worshiped his body with hungry eyes like Kurogane was currently doing. He had bent forward and was currently swirling his tongue around one of Fai's nipples while his finger gently massaged the other, alternating between rubbing the areola and pinching the tender skin between his thumb and index finger.

Applying just enough pressure to make Fai squirm his hips in the younger man's lap. He was acutely aware that this was not the most privet of setting and the blond mentally kicked himself for not finding them a better place to continue.

Fai wanted his lover very naked right now. Naked and on top of him—inside of him.

He didn't want to focus all of his attention on being quite—he wanted to scream in pleasure and curse his lover for making him feel so undone.

Not in the middle of his club though—definitely not in front of his employees. To ensure he didn't draw too much attention to himself, Fai was coving his mouth with one of his hands—his other fisting into Kuro-tease's tee-shirt.

All of these sensations were too much but in a wonderfully, overwhelmingly, delicious way that made him want to crawl out of his own skin.

Kind of like when you went to chiropractor—and their adjustments just hurt so fucking right.

Fai tugged particularly hard at Kurogane's tee and the younger stopped his intoxicating little nips and kisses to look at Fai.

"Do you uh… really wanna…?" Kurogane ground his erection against Fai's ass as if to finish the unspoken question and Fai whimpered and nodded his head quickly.

He was sure he was going to die after all of that teasing. He needed release.

"You wanna do it… here? I don't have any lube or a condo—" Fai silenced him with a sloppy kiss.

"Fuck the lube just use spit." Fai ground their hips together and Kurogane growled at the contact.

"And the condom?"

Fai would defiantly prefer it if they didn't use one—but now was not the time to push that issue. While he only ever used protection when his partner requested, he always came prepared.

"Wallet." His words came out in a breathy sigh while he shifted to regain the black leather Dunhill wallet. He retrieved the shiny metal wrapper and handed it to Kurogane before tossing his wallet back on the table.

To his surprise—the taller man set it aside and those hot hands run up his sides again and pulled Fai forward and the taller man kissed his way down the blonde's neck. Every move he made was smooth, paced, thoroughly deliberate, and it was intoxicating.

Kurogane ran those hot hands back down his sides, dragging his nails lightly across the smooth pail skin, then up his back. Massaging small circles in the tight muscles as he went. Fai was left again gripping uselessly onto his cloths and shifting his hips back and forth to create an enticing friction.

Eventually with enough quite whines Kurogane kissed his lips a little more roughly and reached for the blonde's belt. The buckle came loose with a little work and Fai shifted onto his knees so that he was eye level with his lover.

Their position was unfortunately awkward considering their tight quarters and the inconvenience of clothing. Fai didn't want to get completely naked in public like this… that wasn't a good call.

Again, he mentally kicked himself for not planning this better.

Kuro-crafty seemed to be content to make it work and Fai didn't question him when he was presented with three very large fingers. The blonde gave his best sultry look as sucked them with a little more force then needed.

Kurogane watched him with famished eyes—Fai hoped that he was thinking about what it would be like to have him sucking someplace a little more pleasant. His mind wondered back to his earlier musings about whip cream and a little rope and he moaned a little too loudly.

It was a much more—vivid—picture from the taller man's lap.

There was no need for fantasies when he had the real thing in front of him right now though.

Once he had meticulously coated Kurogane's fingers with saliva he closed his eyes and tried to relax as he felt that same hand slide down the back of his slacks. Kurogane probed at his entrance while nipping and kissing his way down Fai's neck and the overwhelming sensation of the hot breath puffing against his skin, and the gentle pressure of those slick fingers made him squirm.

The feeling of wanting to crawl out of his skin was back and his own breath of coming out in airy gasps before there had even been any penetration at all. At this rate he was going to cum—and that was embarrassing.

He wasn't used to someone being able to make his body react this way.

The first finger entered his body smoothly and Fai leaned forward to burry his face in the crook of Kurogane's neck to muffle his moan when he crooked it just right. The blonde swore he could hear a satisfied smirk in the younger man's next low growl.

Fai could only assume what he looked like right now. On his knees hovering above Kurogane's lap—ass out—leaning forward with arms wrapped around strong shoulders.

Sure, he could ruin the picture that his lover seemed so pleased with if he wanted to. That didn't sound like very much fun—so Fai let Kurogane continue to lead their little dance for now and closed his eyes to enjoy the feeling of strong fingers slowly stretching him.

A second finger was added and the taller mans free hand moved to tug down the front of Fai's boxers to free his arousal. His entire body shivered as Kurogane touched his cock just like he had been touching the rest of him.

Who would have thought him such a fucking tease?

Fai loved it.

A little more pressure was applied as Kurogane was smoothly running a closed fist up and down his length while the third finger was added. Fai had taken to kissing and sucking at Kuro-koi's thick neck and bit him rather roughly as he hit that bundle of nerves that threatened to put Fai over the edge.

"I take it—" Kurogane brushed it again while swiping his thumb over the head of the blonde's cock. "—that's the spot?"

"If you keep that up, I'm going to—"

"Do it." Kurogane massaged his prostate with a little more pressure and quickened the pace of his other hand and Fai unwrapped his arms and leaned his weight back so that he could kiss his lover.

"What about?" his eyes flickered down to the painfully obvious hard on in the younger man's jeans.

"Don't worry about that right now. I want to see you cum." Kurogane's voice came out in a low growl that caused Fai to shudder again.

"And is Kuro-sama usually such a gracious lover or do you just like to watch?" Fai leaned back into the raven haired man's touches, encouraging him to increase the pressure a smidge more.

He didn't answer—but Fai could assume from the way those eyes were watched the smaller man's hips moving provocatively—that he may have found a cute kink.

He could defiantly get into this.

Fai sucking in a deep breath though his nose and held it for a moment, in an attempt to get better control of the tingling in his cock. Not yet—this was too good to end yet.

The blonde made a show of using a single finger to tilt Kurogane's chin up, forcing their eyes to meet, before using the other hand to drag up his own torso. As he had expected—those crimson eyes locked in on what he was doing to himself.

Fai left a frustrated pout on his face while he closed his eyes and tiled his head back. With his own hand he traced up his sensitive side, traced over his protruding collar bones, ran them over his own erect nipples.

It felt nice—almost as nice as when Kurogane had done it for him earlier.

It must have looked nice too because he felt the younger man shift below him and sigh. The grip on the blonde's dick was firmer, and he was jerking him off faster now—matching the way he was moving his fingers.

Fai was bracing himself against the tanned man with a hand on his very warm, very broad chest. Said hand fisted in to the fabric, nails digging into his skin as Fai was hit with a sudden waive of pleasure that he wasn't expecting.

He came hard, back arching in an impressive show of flexibility as he covered his breathy gasps with his hand. Streams of sticky, hot cum shot out of him as he felt his member jolt.

Kurogane didn't seem to mind the mess that had spattered his clothing and continued to move his hands as his lover orgasmed.

When the last of pleasurable spasms washed over Fai's body the raven-haired man withdrew his fingers and reached for the napkins the waitress had so kindly provided them and started to wipe away the mess.

The blonde tugged his slacks up a little higher, so he wasn't as exposed, and shifted to sit next to him. Fai sipped his scotch and tried to think just how he was going to pay this little scamp back for that.

He hadn't expected this to take as long as it was—but this wasn't an unpleasant surprise by any means.

Slowly he leaned down to grab his clothing that was currently rumpled by Kurogane's feet and tossed them to the other side of the booth before sliding down to take their place.

"Hey, you don't have to—" Kurogane gave him a surprised look.

"I want to." Fai cut him off and placed his delicate hands on the man's belt buckle—pausing for permission.

Kurogane gave a nod and watched with wrapped interest as Fai turned his attention to the pesky cloths that was hiding his prize. He had popped more than a few belts in his day—and Fai was marveling and the younger man's impressive manhood within seconds.

The blonde licked at the impressive amount of precum that had collected at the head of his dates cock and concluded that Kuro-myuu had been enjoying himself with his earlier teasing. It was the blondes turn to make his partner squirm now though—and given their sizable age difference—he had a lot more experience doing just that.

Swirling his tongue around the head he slid both of his hands up under the hem of the dark shirt that was marring his perfect view of Kuro-love's no doubt impressive stomach.

And what a sight it was.

He was definitely going to need a night to admire this body in all its glory.

Fai took more of his lover into his mouth and sucked hard. Smirking around his cock, the blonde's blue eyes flickered up to see Kurogane's face, and he was not disappointed. Those red eyes were still watching him—only instead of being heavy with hunger—they were half lidded with need.

Good.

Fai closed his eyes and relaxed his throat and impressed himself by taking the entirety of his date manhood. Humming softly, he opened his eyes again and felt Kuro-wan twitch when their gaze met again.

Fai felt heat rushing back down between his own legs and he reached a hand down to slide inside of his own boxers.

Leaning his head back the blond applied just enough pressure with his lips to get his first moan. Kurogane raised a hand to tangle into his short locks and watched as Fai swished his tongue over the tip.

"Kuro-chan tastes good." He purred and felt the fingers in his hair tighten uncomfortably.

"It's Kurogane damm—Fuck…" Fai cut him off by sucking hard on the head of his penis and giving him an innocent look before closing his eyes and bobbing his head up and down.

It continued on like that. The older man earned quite a few moans and curses from the younger any time he would glace up or make a show of what he was doing. Fai could feel Kurogane getting close a few times—his cock was twitching with need—and he made sure to switch things up enough to keep this little game going for as long as he could.

He had been in the middle of deep throating his lover when he felt a tug at his hair. His eyes flickered up to see the taller man motion for him to come up with his free hand.

Slightly disappointed at not getting to show off the rest of his oral skills with the big finally, he climbed up from under the table.

He was letting Kuro-handsome be the boss. He had to remember.

Fai settled in the booth next to the raven-haired man and relished in the feeling off Kurogane's hands on his cool cheeks as he kissed him roughly.

"Not that that wasn't fucking amazing…" he let his words trail off and he kissed Fai more insistently. "I just really wanted to fuck you."

"By all means Kuro-chan." Fai cooed.

That had been the ultimate go of all of this hadn't it?

The blonde could tell that his date was much more excited now then he had been at the beginning of their little necking session. His hands moved with fervor as he tugged him into position and Fai found himself on his knees—hands gripping the top of the high back booth while his partner wracked hands over his body and kissed his neck.

He had already cum once tonight, but he was more than ready for round two.

He could here Kurogane opening the condom and adjusted his own clothing so that his lover would have better access to where he needed to be.

Fai held his breath as Kurogane slowly entered him—one of those hot hands on his left hip—the other on his right shoulder.

The blonde winced a little—Kurogane was definitely well endowed and prelubricated condom or no—it would unquestionably be more comfortable if they had come a little better equipped.

His discomfort was quickly forgotten when Kurogane reached around and grabbed his throbbing cock, however. After a few seconds of adjustment time—he set a brutally brilliant rhythm for them that had Fai breathless.

Was it possible to be addicted to a sensation? Because Fai was sure no other feeling in the world was quite like the feeling of Kurogane fucking him in this booth.

They were both exceedingly careful to stay quite—for Fai that meant again covering his mouth with one hand while he tried to hang onto the back of the booth with the other. Between his own muffles sighs and whimpers he could here Kurogane legitimately growling as he thrusted into him and it was honestly the most erotic thing that had ever happened to him.

Fai came shockingly fast and was sure his eyes were rolling into the back of his head from the hot waves of pleaser that were slamming into him with every thrust. Kurgoane followed not long after and the blonde found himself grinning as he came with a stream of curse words whispered under his breath.

Oh yes… this had been just what Fai needed.

Kurogane pulled out carefully and handed Fai a few of the napkins before cleaning himself up. Fai hadn't expected to be pulled back into his dates lap after they had finished—and he especially didn't expect to get a soft kiss on the neck and his drink handed to him.

"You're awfully sweet Kuro-puu." Normally Fai wouldn't tolerate such affections after a hookup—but he was starting to get tired and Kurogane was really very comfortable.

Besides they still had drinks to finish.

"Not really. What do you expect me to do? Zip my jeans and ditch after I just fucked you?" Kurogane sipped his sake and Fai rolled his eyes.

Yes. That is usually how these things went.

"That's normally close to how it goes. If I didn't know any better, I would think you had a crush on me." Fai leaned his head on his dates strong shoulders and yawned.

He was going to need to find somewhere privet to refresh soon.

"Fuck that. You're hot but I can tell your fucking insane."

Fai snorted. Good observation kid.

"You're not wrong there Kuro-woof." Fai tipped his head back and finished off the rest of his drink. He could vaguely here his stepfather scolding him in the back of his mind for not savoring the flavor of such an expensive scotch – but Fai only drank the stuff because he liked how it smelled. Besides the sooner they finished there drinks the sooner he could go top up.

"It's Kurogane you freak." The taller man fallowed suit and knocked back the rest of his drink. "Hey, you know where the bathroom is here? I gotta clean up a bit."

The blonde's eyes flickered to his soiled clothing and frowned. Yeah—that would be for the best.

"Sure. Just a sec ok?" Fai grabbed his own clothing and quickly buttoned up his dress shirt, tucking it in and fixing his belt in an attempt to look a little less sex rumpled. He didn't think he was pulling it off, and draped his vest, tie, and jacket over his arm and stood.

Kurogane watched him lazily and followed him out of the booth. Fai was reminded of his date's glorious height and smirked as he led them though the winding booths, back down the stairs, and past the door that very clearly read 'employees only.'

"Hey, is it ok if were back here?" Kurogane looked around curiously as Fai led him past the store room, back past the brake room, and into the employee bathroom.

"I work here silly." Fai winked at him, holding the door open for the younger man.

"You seriously screwed someone at your job? Your boss is cool with that?" Kurogane entered the room and looked at himself in the mirror. The dried cum on his shirt and pants stood out against his black clothing.

Whoops.

Fai didn't answer as he followed him in and started to fix his own clothing. The lighting was dim enough in the club that no one would notice. The light provided from the street lamps weren't much better, so it wasn't the end of the world.

"What are you doing after this?" Kurogane asked as he used a damp paper towel to try and get some of the evidence washed away.

"Going back to work." Fai made quick work of redressing. This wasn't the first time he had had to salvage a wrinkled outfit—wouldn't be the last.

"Fuck. Good luck with that." Kurogane gave up and tossed the paper towel in the trash and turned to lean against the sink and watch him.

"I take it your nightly excursions are over Kuro-tan?" Fai tightened his tie and pulled out his cell phone.

Ugh. He was starting to regret sending Syaoran home…

"Yeah."

The blonde ignored the text messages and emails that had flooded in since his arrival at Kyuden and went to his contacts. Opening up a blank card he handed his phone to his date and smiled.

"If you don't mind Kuro-cutie." Kurogane took his phone and gingerly entered his name and number into his phone and handed it back. "Thank you sir."

The blond stepped close to the taller man and pressed his back against Kurogane's chest. Lifting his phone up above both of there heads he gave a dazzling smile and cooed. "Say Cheeses Kuro-scowl!"

Of course—Kurogane didn't comply and instead of a selfie with two gentlemen smiling happily in a post sex glow—they ended up with one man smiling in a post sex glow, and one glaring so hard one would expect the camera to shatter.

And wasn't that perfect?

"Whaa! Look how cute we are?" Fai teased as he set the photo as Kurogane's contact picture. He also sent it to the younger man, so he would have the blonde's number.

"You are such a fucking weirdo." Kurogane growled at him but checked his phone as soon as the message came though non the less.

"Yes—but I am a hot weirdo." The blonde reminded before turning to lead them both back out to the main room of the club.

Fai tossed his cc on the bar as they passed Yuto and walked Kurogane back out to the street. "I ordered you an Uber."

"you didn't need to do that or pay for the drink you know?" the raven-haired man sighed and glared daggers at him.

"What's the point of seeing and older man if they don't pick up the tab?" The blonde teased and Kurogane gave him a slightly scandalized look.

"Hey! That's not what this was about!" Fai laughed. Kurogane was practically stomping his feet in frustration.

Luckily for the younger man, the cab pulled up and Fai graciously opened the back door for him.

Once the cab had pulled away Fai went back inside—he just had to get though the rest of the night… He could do this.

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTERS 10 + 11

we had a week of peace and now we’re gonna get annihilated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i have no clue how long this liveblog may end up but hell and high water i’m combining them both

she tore the jade pendant from her neck and flung it into the darkness.

let’s give a warm welcome, to sadness,

i’m very excited for all-new cinder content hhhhhhh if u havent gathered by now I Love This Bitch and I Love Her Many Problems so im thankful for this gift 😞

Cinder was a ruin, her pride carved and served like slabs of meat.

i can FEEL diesel n kc rly patting themselves on the back for every bit of wet meat they can toss at me!!!!!!!!!! U HEAR THAT I CAN FEEL U!!!!!!!!!!! but also i still love this shit w/ all my heart!!!!!!!!!! IM NEVER GONNA STOP SAYIN IT

She had never looked at Glynda’s files.

im so sorry cinder baby but that whole thing? is still HILARIOUS oh my GOD i cannot believe you fucked up that badly. u shoved yr entire head into a beartrap. u absolutely crapped yr pants on that one. yr gonna be thinking abt that on yr deathbed,

/looks at the chapter title again

hhhhhhhh im. so pumped. its gonna be hard to talk abt most of this w/o doing a million fingerguns a minute but i’m gonna try my best

Cinder approached the mirror and touched its silvered face with black-tipped claws,

I SAID IM GONNA TRY MY BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She was iron barbs beneath the nail bed, glowing coals underfoot, the singular capacity to do harm. She was a beast, armed with fang and claw and a deep, dark void where her compassion should have laid, and she was dressed for dinner.

HHHHHH god YES THIS IS THE CINDER IM THIRSTY FOR............ i literally cannot say anything that isnt a massive 👈😎👈 but AAAAAAA

like im reading thru this and i cant cherry-pick lines this whole bit? is SO GOOD...  kc n diesel are Yet Again obliterating me w/ their mastery of the narrative style of offal hunt and i just love all of this i rly wish i could explain how offal hunt is EXACTLY MY BRAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! F U C K

The final touch on her mastercraft disaster: the four sawed-off horn stumps which grew among her silver-streaked hair.

HOOOO B O I i am. Losin it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE HER HORNS.......... CINDR...............

Wretchedly, she wondered: did Glynda even respect her now?

any other villain: my plan didnt work and im mad >:( cinder fall: my plan didnt work and now im mad but also mostly sad :(

CINDER’S TRYING HER BEST GOD.......... i literally hate how the remaster has made her So Soft, Actually... I BELIEVE IN U CINDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE U!!!!!!!!!!!!! DO YR BEST

Every part of her was hot and hollow. She was sick with loathing.

i LOVE HER.... CINDER I HOPE U KNO THAT YR LOVED... god tho i dont like how SAD I AM RN... cinder’s so small and the world is so big and wants 2 Shit On Her blease

honestly like. im rly- LOOK I SAID THIS BEFORE BUT. this is why im rly lovin the new cinder content because in the first version we only got glimpses of her internal machinations and now we’re in full-blown Always Sad territory and everything is suffering :)

She blinked. Her double did not.

‘well’, thought murphy. ‘that’s terrifying.’

she’d only survived thanks to a keen instinct for danger, cultivated during her tenuous teenage years.

i NEED. I NEED. CINDER BACKSTORY. all these lil nuggets dont constitute a meal! I WANT A BIG MAC AND FRIES. WHAT THE HELL WAS THIS BABY DOING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

also again. the body horror of offal hunt? peak content. Im Lovin It

its getting harder to divine what is and what is not a 👈😎👈 because we got bits sprinkled around and theres only rly a spoiler potential if u glue em all together so im still being extra careful and the answer is blared in everyones faces so this whole kondor scene will go uncommented unless some Bullshit Happens which it will, so,

When she had become so invested in Glynda’s approval? When had a desire to be recognized as something inhuman, something ferocious, something black and terrible and capable of keeping up with Glynda Fucking Goodwitch turned into this?

oh! oh! i have the answer! i do! i know the answer! it’s you a lesbian,

The spectres of her youth haunted this city, owl-eyed children and fox-eared teens. They’d been a second sort of family, the only kind she’d had within these walls, and she’d wondered what had become of them in the past decades, but…

It was too sentimental, and she wasn’t meant to be a creature of sentiment.

oh boy okay wow

okay so actually this bit made me cry??? fuck OFF im losing it!!!!!!!! LET HER BE SENTIMENTAL!!!! LET HER HAVE PPL TO CARE ABT!!!!!!!!!! IM LITERALLY CRYING IM GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!

She would go barefoot from this point on, her heels clutched at her side. When she left the hotel room to steal into the night, she promised herself not to look back.

im sorry im just. so sad rn. i havent cried over a fic in YEARS and we still have another chapter ago i hate this SO MUCH..............

here comes chapter 11 

if i cry even once more im going to stab!!!!!! im not sure what BUT ILL STAB!!!!!!!!!!!!

Even without his wings, the Manticore would easily have been twice the size of any of the other Grimm, far outstripping them in sheer bulk.

HATI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HATI HATI HATI

holy shit we actually get to see him this time!!!!!!!!!!! WE GET TO SEE THIS LEGENDARY BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS CHONCC,

also hes a manticore now which is, Radical, may i just say, and just a little bit sexy,

The effortless grace in each move betrayed power most Grimm would not live to achieve. Once he stood, he had to dip his head low to meet her eye to eye. His canines were the length of her forearm.

if u werent here for the remaster? we never even SAW hati but now hes here, hes Big, and rly thats all that matters,

Like a child who’d been allowed to lie and lie until at last they’d strangled themself in the web they’d spun, Cinder couldn’t speak. Could only wait on his verdict.

every single one of cinder’s inherent themes is killing me and this business w/ family? stop. im dying. this is rude

The scant space between them popped and cracked like an sparking flame, warm and effervescent, and this time, Cinder lingered, hugging Hati close.

IF I CRY ONCE MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MEAN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IF U ASSHOLES MAKE ME CRY ONCE MORE I WILL DOXX YOU,

aaaaaaaaaaaaaah im loving this content i rly dont have words for it dhjfgsdfgjh i just, rly like the words, and the order theyre in, and i honestly keep forgetting to liveblog it cause i just wanna READ EM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tempting as it was—as it always had been, ever since she’d left the relative safety of the wastes and learned what happened to scraggly-limbed teens with horns and fangs and gleaming eyes—

with every chapter i desperately have 2 kno more abt baby cinder i HAVE to know i am so. UNBEARABLY CURIOUS... baby cinder what happened... what happened 2 u....

A lantern’s glow warmed her, bleeding into the darkness leeching at them both. It was a gentle gold across her skin, and like an answering signal from a distant outpost, Cinder saw a flush of light through the dark fur lining Hati’s throat, as though flames licked at his insides.

i forgot. that cinder glows like that when she feels Loved or full of pride and you know what i dont like these chapters. they were made to hurt me and i Dont Like That (im mclovin it)

From the safety of Hati’s neck, she found it easier—after all this time, he was still her bastion.

WHEN YOU REALISE? THAT YR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES?? STOP,

For a regular person, the machine would be able to draw out short bursts of power, the likes of which no Semblance could ever channel. The taxation would eventually destroy the soul so deeply, so thoroughly, as to leave it empty for good.

For a Witch? For—

the fact. she cut herself off before she could think ‘for glynda’. has me on the FLOOR. this bit is just So Much i dont like it

Glynda Goodwitch would not abandon this hunt. Cinder knew it, had read it from her palms like an open book—Glynda Goodwitch did not know how to stop. If it had been anyone else on Remnant, they might never return, might never pull themselves back into action after today—but Glynda did not have a shred of self-preservation.

me, knocking against cinder’s head: u kno for someone w/ so many schemes in yr brain yr pretty dumb and gay, huh,

firstly let’s talk abt cinder’s “””””””””””””””””””self-preservation””””””””””””””””””” instin-- whats that? not found? yes

[Glynda’s] eyes were empty, hungry, insatiable.

i feel like ive read this line before! lets jump back a chapter--

In [Cinder’s] eyes, there was a subtle, endless hunger.

WAKE UP CINDER SHE’S YR SOULMATE!!!!!!!!!!! THE COFFEE’S READY U CAN SMELL THE BACON FROM HERE WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

With a fluid leap, they were in the air, the ground quickly shrinking beneath them. Pressing her face against his neck to shield herself from the wind, she closed her eyes and prepared herself for what was to come, trusting Hati to deliver her safely.

that said i ADORE my boy hati is literally the best part of offal hunt kc and diesel do not interact,

He was frozen in horrific anticipation, like watching an imminent tragedy and being absolutely helpless to stop it. Like all the tension was mixed with grief and hopeless, futile fear.

when will offal hunt be nice to me. when will any of these characters get to be happy. hello. im full of sadness.

The sound was like a saw working back and forth, but resonating inside her head, rattling every tooth in her jaw, deafening to her ears.

im literally gritting my teeth at this i can hear it in my own head and its Very Bad!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

okay god i can barely handle to quote anything more this bit is hurting ME so lets swiftly move on before I Die

Cinder closed her weary eyes, sinking into sleep like a shallow grave.

BE NICE TO HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BE NICE TO HER JUST THIS ONCE, PLEASE, IM BEGGING YOU,

They only knew death, only ever sought death; fangs and claws slicked with blood, magic rending meat and marrow apart, and everywhere that choking, scalding heat, spilled blood like magma, like the core of a planet.

hmm... that seems like a 👈😎👈 ~reference~

They were all alert, ears pricked, hackles raised like Hati’s. They all fixed on the same spot, somewhere beyond the darkness of the cave opening, and though she could barely think, she knew:

She was out of time. The Witch was here.

oh no.

okay so THATS CHAPTERS 10 AND 11! i only cried ONCE and u kno what thats. a Victory. these two chapters were VERY GOOD i rly loved em and i can tell new readers r gonna have a blast w/ this shit!!!!!!!!!! meanwhile i, a veteran reader, am full of peril,

terrible.

[baekhvuns]

I hope SM and Hybe get that gummi dickhead, because honestly what the fuck is going on. And not stans caring more about the dating rumours statement, just stfu. Btw another Taehyung dream... why

Omg if you start TVD let me know, I used to be so so involved. I was a Delena (Damon x Elena) girl but tbh fuck Damon, unless I headcanon him as Hwa. Though I loved a guy named Klaus who was VERY questionable, so maybe I shouldn't talk. TVD, Gossip Girl, PLL, Teen Wolf, Glee used to be my trash

People say Fireworks was boring but HOW? And it sounded very Ateez to me, those who didn't like Inception got their noise and it was soft at times. Yeah DV might sound underwhelming, but idc I love it and it's good and cunty

Hotteoks, Yunhopowers I'm confused tbh, the names are all over the place, not to mention the guys pushing weird ass names (Ddeongwives.... no). Anyway your struggles with that Yunho fic akuriaidkansjskzkhehs miss Baek fighting her inner demons

I think the frosty colour faded which happens, but Hwa's roots look better I think. I hope he goes icy again, but white shades are really hard to maintain ;/

THAT CHERRY PHOTO MURDERED ME, LOOK AT THIS ART. Is it safe to say I'll surely be getting that photocard, but pretend you didn't see it

Girl, the denial is real, our pathetic man is not getting the girl, but he'll get all the other bitches (us) so it's fine 🥰 I just need him to br quiet

A birthday party for moi in a castle you say?! In king's castle?!

That's right the SM-fication of miss Lightiny :( she bald and too basic

Ngl I had high hopes for miss Seulgi but the song and MV was a bit mid, I'll have to listen to the whole album though. She still looked and sounded great, I loved the dark vibe, but maybe expected the song to take a different route. And "I kiss your brother"??? Don't have one but I'm right here

Who would I choose fuck off ha ha ha. I'm in my Jae Young era, but then Soo Hyuk's voice, and In Youp is so cute </333 it all depends, they'd have to appeal to me with their charms. You? 👀

First few slides summer camp vibes just saying also have you seen the movie No Reservations? Chef Park Seonghwa...

Been minding my own business in Seonghwa's tag here on tumblr dot com, saw Bodyguard Hwa while scrolling and it got me like 🥰 gonna re-read it soon! Next however I came across my enemy number 1 aka Khr*n*s, traumatic experience, got 20 war flashbacks, my family has died, I did NOT have to remember about that fic!!!

Baby boy baby vs Evil (gonna slap his forehead 🤬)

His inspo, his mind... the guy looks good too, now grow your hair out Park Seonghwa. No but the way he draws inspiration from things is so cool and admirable... 😭 - DV 💖

hello hihi!!

I hope SM and Hybe get that gummi dickhead, because honestly what the fuck is going on. And not stans caring more about the dating rumours statement, just stfu. Btw another Taehyung dream... why

I JUST SAW YGS CALLING PEOPLE WHO REMOTELY EVEN MENTIONED V AND JEN TOGETHER 😭😭 hello???? whOSE DREAM??? PPT FORMAT RIGHT NOW RIGHT NOW 🔫

Omg if you start TVD let me know, I used to be so so involved. I was a Delena (Damon x Elena) girl but tbh fuck Damon, unless I headcanon him as Hwa. Though I loved a guy named Klaus who was VERY questionable, so maybe I shouldn't talk. TVD, Gossip Girl, PLL, Teen Wolf, Glee used to be my trash

iM STARTING IT I HAVE BEEN SEEING WAY TO MANY EDITS WITH MR DAMON 😭😭😭 wait fuck damon why 👁👁👄👁👁 head canoning him as hwa right now what tHE fUCK,,, omg glee was seriously so addictive I NEVER UNDERSTOOD PPL 😭😭 I PLAYED THEIR EPISODE GAME TOO I NEVER UNDERSTOOD IT FBFBFB omg but do u rmr shadow hunters 🧍🏻‍♀️

People say Fireworks was boring but HOW? And it sounded very Ateez to me, those who didn't like Inception got their noise and it was soft at times. Yeah DV might sound underwhelming, but idc I love it and it's good and cunty

fireworks ERA TO DV WAS CUNT FULLY ON CUNT,,, it really hurts seeing people have no taste <//3 inception is so elegant??? the slow and reverb version especially,,, silver seonghwa dancing to it would be my 13th reason

Hotteoks, Yunhopowers I'm confused tbh, the names are all over the place, not to mention the guys pushing weird ass names (Ddeongwives.... no). Anyway your struggles with that Yunho fic akuriaidkansjskzkhehs miss Baek fighting her inner demons

LMFAOOOO NO WHAT THE FUCK IS DDEONGWIVES???? SIR???? AND THEN EVERYONE SAYS DONT BE A DELULU?? THIS MAN FEEDING INTO OUR DELULU HE’S- WE MARRIED TO HIM, THIS IS A POLY RELATIONSHIP APPARENTLY,,, i swear this fic pisses me of so much i changed the plot three times, the mood board and all im fighting my demons to write that hwa series 😭😭😭

I think the frosty colour faded which happens, but Hwa's roots look better I think. I hope he goes icy again, but white shades are really hard to maintain ;/

he momentarily gave gd’s hair at mama fbdndhdj yEHA I HOPE HE DOES GO BACK and with these selca’s he’s dropping 😵‍💫😵‍💫 im going to devour him whole

THAT CHERRY PHOTO MURDERED ME, LOOK AT THIS ART. Is it safe to say I'll surely be getting that photocard, but pretend you didn't see it

NO LITERALLY HOW DARE HE??? I SAW IT IN A VERY PUBLIC SETTING AND THE CHILLS I FOT THE URGE TO SCREAM IN A TRAINFQJFHWKDHWKHDWKDBWK IT IS SAFE??? WE ARE PRAYING FOR U TO GET THIS CARD AND IM ON MY WAY SECURE THEM CARDS RIGHT NOW 🔫🔫🔫 RIGHT NOW

ClICK ON THE PHOTO U WONT REGRET IT

Girl, the denial is real, our pathetic man is not getting the girl, but he'll get all the other bitches (us) so it's fine 🥰 I just need him to br quiet

LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 the denial so real i stopped watching it fbfbfbfb HE’LL GET US THATS WHAT MATTERS but i rly be rooting he gets the girlie as in the director has a change of heart <33

A birthday party for moi in a castle you say?! In king's castle?!

ABSOLUTELY THE MAN IS WAITING FOR SOME INTERACTION AND U WILL SEE IT MID NOVEMBER TO END

That's right the SM-fication of miss Lightiny :( she bald and too basic

kq following sm in this but wHERE IS THE KAI X SEONGHWA CRUMBS KQ THEY MET EVERY SM GROUP WHERE IS EXO FHWKHDKW IM GONNA THROW THE GLOBE AT KQ

Ngl I had high hopes for miss Seulgi but the song and MV was a bit mid, I'll have to listen to the whole album though. She still looked and sounded great, I loved the dark vibe, but maybe expected the song to take a different route. And "I kiss your brother"??? Don't have one but I'm right here

i ngl i did too, i was like maybe we’ll get something like invu or idea,,, some scenes (the black and white one) they had the budget they could’ve had the oomph factor bc it looked (is) green screen 😭😭😭 lOVED THE DARK VIBE I WISHED THEY WENT INTO IT MORE,,, seulgi could’ve easily finessed criminal type of music,,, FBWKFJKWH KISSED UR BROTHER MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS SWEET HOME ALABAMA 😭😭

Who would I choose fuck off ha ha ha. I'm in my Jae Young era, but then Soo Hyuk's voice, and In Youp is so cute </333 it all depends, they'd have to appeal to me with their charms. You? 👀

LMFAOOOO BRMWHDKW CHOSE ONE 🔫🔫 I THO WILL CHOSE SOOHYUK BC OF HIS VOICE THE WAY I CURL INTO A BALL WHEN I HEAR THE “m a n N e r” BFNWBDSJ

First few slides summer camp vibes just saying also have you seen the movie No Reservations? Chef Park Seonghwa...

chef park seonghwa….haha. also have a sweet reminder l

Been minding my own business in Seonghwa's tag here on tumblr dot com, saw Bodyguard Hwa while scrolling and it got me like 🥰 gonna re-read it soon! Next however I came across my enemy number 1 aka Khr*n*s, traumatic experience, got 20 war flashbacks, my family has died, I did NOT have to remember about that fic!!!

Baby boy baby vs Evil (gonna slap his forehead 🤬)

FBQMBDMQDJKW NAURRR I SEE IT SOMETIMES TOO AND THE WAY I HURRIEDLY SCROLL PAST IT 😭😭😭 hopefully the new one drops soon so u don’t have to reread fics dbwmdbwm RHWKHDWK DONT BE SHY READ IT <3 READ KHRONUS <333 BFWKHDSK IDK HOW U WILL RESPOND TO THE NEW SERIES THEN FBFB

DAILY REMINDER

His inspo, his mind... the guy looks good too, now grow your hair out Park Seonghwa. No but the way he draws inspiration from things is so cool and admirable... 😭 - DV 💖

NO BC I THOUGHT OF U WHEN WOO MENTIONED THOSE ESP THAT LONG HAIR AND THAT SHARPASS NOSE THATS GOOD FOR ALOT OF THINGS

and,,

WHO IS THIS GUY

[writing-in-riverdale]

Twin Andrews - part one

( a rosie original )

riverdale x oc

a/n: im re-writing my first and favourite small series ‘Twin Andrews’! i feel like it needed a reboot so now that i have the inspiration im going to try and redo the entire series from scratch!! please read along it’d mean the world. also i’ll be doing a taglist so if you’re interested let me know. yours forever, ro 🦋

word count: 3.1k

masterlist

“I’m nervous.”

YOU admit to your brother as you shift on the uncomfortable leather seats in Archie’s pick up. The truck reeked of testosterone it was a concoction of lynx and sweat. What you assumed was a day old bag of pops containing an almost eaten cheeseburger and stray fries wasn’t helping with the smell either, the small green tree hanging from his mirror doing nothing to dispel the horrible stench.

”You’ll be fine,” He promises. You glance over at your brother, taking him in for the first time since you landed; it’d been 3 years away from your twin. You were 13 when you left, just entering high school. You honestly felt lost without him, like a piece of you was somewhat gone, but it was here in Riverdale the entire time.

Archie was exactly eight minutes older than you, and he liked to remind you of that every chance he could. You both inherited the same fiery red hair as your mother and the chocolate brown eyes from your father, he was almost a head taller than you, but you both seemed to get your sportiness from your mother. Although you were quite the clutz, you still enjoyed sports, unlike your born-to-be-a-football-star brother who was praised for his golden footwork.

You turn away from the redhead as your breath seems to hitch in your throat, your heart taking an audible jump when it pounds through your chest as you take in the surroundings. It was only 7 pm on a Sunday night, but the air was nippy and the sky was already a shade of black - sprinkling with stars. The tall street lights and the neon red sign illuminating the small car park was enough to tell you that you were at Pop’s famous chock’lit shoppe.

“If this isn’t a blast from the past,” You sigh as cars litter the car park. The diner seemed to be bursting at the seams with customers, some spilt outside - cigarettes hanging from there mouths. There’re so many varsity jackets that you lose yourself in the crowd.

“It looks really busy, maybe Betty couldn’t get our booth and went home?” Your brother turns into an open spot, shutting off the ignition as he twirls his keys in his palm. He had that wicked smile playing on his lips, and you knew that there was no way he was letting you stay inside this truck.

“C’mon, Red, she’s excited to see you,” You let out a small breath and unclip your seat belt, sliding out of the car and into the cool night air. The sound of the jukebox and peoples’ overlapping conversations travelled through the small carpark as the door of the diner swings open and closed.

As the two of you make your way toward the door, you grow nervous. You can feel gazes already falling upon you, your flaming red hair drawing unwanted attention to yourself, not to mention that your brother is wearing a bright blue jacket and happens to be one of the most popular kids at RHS. You realised that sneaking into town unnoticed wasn’t going to go as well as you had hoped.

The small, gold bell rings as Archie pulls the door open; he ushers you in and you step into the warm diner, the smell of burgers and bacon hitting you square in the face. Your stomach made an almost inhuman sound as your mouth waters at the aroma coming from the kitchen. You had no idea you were hungry, but now there was no way you were leaving this place without a greasy cheeseburger and fries.

Pop, the man himself, moves toward the front counter; he looked exactly how he did three years ago, a little tired and overworked but he still had that glint of imagination in his eyes. You almost think he doesn’t recognise you (you were a little slimmer than usual, tanner and your hair had gotten quite long). But your thoughts were short-lived when he passes the counter and envelops you in a tight hug, giving you the warm Pop’s smile that you’d missed over the years.

“What will it be, Miss Andrews? The usual?”

You share a smile at your brother, before nodding at the older man, “Two of the usual sounds amazing.” Pop nods, scribbling down the orders and then rushing off into the kitchen.

You scan the room looking for a familiar face, until your eyes settle upon a familiar blonde ponytail. You stop in your tracks as you stare at the fair skinned girl, nervousness growing a pit in your stomach. You hadn’t seen her since you were 13, and you’d never even got the chance to say goodbye before you were ripped out of the small town life and thrown into the city.

What if she hates me?

Had it been you, you would have hated it: leaving for 3 years without a single call or text, never knowing what had happened or if you were even okay. You were surprised that she even wanted to see you after all this time.

She sits there in all her glory, Miss Elizabeth Cooper. She looks thinner and she’s wearing makeup, not a lot but enough to notice - wringing her wrists and glancing constantly out the window. It’s like she’s looking for someone: for us.

You start to walk towards her booth, excitement and worry bubbling up inside of you as the distance between the two grows smaller and smaller. Smaller and smaller, until you’re pulled to a halt, your chucks squeaking against the clean white tiles beneath you and drawing a crowd as the sound screeches through the crowded diner.

“I didn’t tell her you were coming,” The words fall out your brother’s mouth and you swivel toward him, a million emotions swarming through your brain as you look at the pale boy - seeing a hint of guilt on his face. Before you get the chance to escape before anyone else notices you, a small voice from behind you made your shoulder slump in defeat.

“Lydia?” You hear her whisper in disbelief, she wasn’t sure if her mind was playing a trick on her or if her best friend with the cherry red hair was here - standing a few meters away from her in your signature chucks. After years of radio silence, there you stood.

Your heart pounds in your chest, your breathing unsteady. You couldn’t believe that your brother had tricked you into coming here. You thought forgiveness was on the horizon, but she looked just as distraught as you felt.

“You haven’t called me Lydia in ages,” You try a tired smile, watching as the eyes of the blonde dart between you and your brother - almost like she was waiting for you to just disappear. Almost like she was afraid to say something or make any sudden movements, otherwise you might vanish.

The diner seems to go silent, watching as the two of you staring at each other, not knowing what to do. You feel self-conscious and suck in a depth breath, trying to focus on anything that wasn’t Betty or the millions of kids sitting in the neighbouring booths.

Your brother breaks you from your trance as he moves past you and toward the girl, wrapping her in a tight embrace. He pulls away, proceeding to give her an ‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that I was bringing your best friend back’ look.

“She had no idea you didn’t know,” He defends you. Your brother was always good like that; he had your back no matter what. Call it big brother intuition. Betty moves her bright blue eyes toward you giving you the ‘get your ass over here so I can hug you’ look.

You feel a slight weight lift off your shoulder and you walk over to the blonde, throwing your arms around her neck in an embrace.

God, had you forgotten how good Betty’s hugs were.

Tears prickled in your eyes as you take in her scent. She smelt like strawberries and sweet perfume, and it reminded you of your childhood spent dancing around Betty’s bedroom.

“It’s so good to have you back,” She whispers. You can hear the shakiness in her voice as she pulls away, dabbing at her under eyes before straightening herself up looking to see if anyone had noticed her cozy embrace with the Andrews twin. You give her a small sad smile.

“It’s good to be back,“ You let yourself relax as the three of you slide into the booth, the touch of your skin hitting the red leather seats feeling familiar and comforting. You can still feel Betty’s gaze on you as she sits down next to you, blinking to make sure you were still here.

You find a large grin stuck on your lips as you soak in the happy atmosphere. It’s what you missed the most about Riverdale; the nights like this, in Pop’s with friends and copious amounts of fries. The diner looks the exact same as it did when you left. It held a lot of memories, both good and bad.

Your eyes wander over to the table diagonally from where you were sitting. It was that very table that your parents had taken you and Archie one cold November night to tell you that they were filling for a divorce. You were 13 and the diner smelt like eggs and coffee, it was quiet but everyone seemed to know what was happening beside the two of you. Mum let you have dessert because she felt bad - you didn’t eat that night, or for a while after.

Your eyes continue to roam to the front end of the diner where the jukebox was perched right near the register. You remember countless days after school in which you, Betty and Archie would stick quarters in the jukebox and play ‘September’ by Earth Wind and Fire, and dance across the tiled floor until Chuck Clayton told the entire school that you danced like a loser. You were 10 and it was the first time and last time you were ever picked on. Archie simply gave him something funnier to laugh at.

Everything in this place reminds you of countless memories, enough to make your eyes sting with nostalgia. Your brother and Betty were deep in conversation when the diner bell chimed. A load of teens push through the door, filling the main floor. You glance up through your lashes and your heart races at the sight.

Betty glances up and waves down her friends before turning to you, ”I’m sorry I invited a few friends. I hope you don’t mind.” You shake your head, glancing upwards and plastering a small smile on your face. Here we go.

It was about 0.2 seconds before the brunette boy came bounding straight over to you, pulling your small frame out from the booth and into his steady frame. Boys been working out. You return the embrace, rocking back and forth on your heels.

”Well if it isn’t Lydia Andrews,” He pulls back giving you a wink before holding you at arm’s length and examining you. A thousand thoughts are running through his head as he glances at you; you weren’t the same 13-year-old girl, he knew that for sure.

”Hi Kev,” You laugh for the first time since arriving, a shit-eating grin plastering on the boy’s pale exterior. ”I can tell somebodies been hitting them gym, hottie alert!” You gawk and he rolls his eyes at your remark, taking a look at your figure. You weren’t exactly skinny back in middle school, but now you’d dropped the extra weight and you couldn’t be happier about it.

”Please, you’re the one who’s turned into a complete smoke show,” He pushes your shoulder playfully, taking the open seat next to you and mumbling a bunch of compliments in your ear. You watch a raven-haired girl squish into the seat next to your brother.

She’s definitely not small town, has to be a new addition to Riverdale. She may as well have written ‘city girl’ on her forehead in black marker.

”Archiekins, aren’t you going to introduce me?” You cringe at the nickname as the girl glances up at your brother - nudging him slightly. Kevin nods his head softly as you look up at him. Don’t ask.

”Ronnie, meet Lyd. Lyds, Ronnie.” The girl shoots her hand across the table. You wearily stick your hand out and join with hers, sharing a long firm handshake.

”I’m-”

”Archie twins?” She finishes, looking lovingly up at your brother. You nod, sensing the tension falling on the table - your best friend practically burning holes in Veronica’s head.

”Are you dating my brother?” You quiz, confusion raining over you. Archie never mentioned any Veronica to you. Would he really not tell you if he got a girlfriend? Were you really that out of touch with your twin?

”No!” Betty replies before Veronica has the chance to, her eyes wide and everyone silences at her sudden outburst. She composes herself before trying to mask her discomfort, “Ronnie is new here. She goes to RHS.”

You nodded, getting the feeling that something else was happening that you hadn’t figured out yet. Betty looked annoyed as she wondered why everyone thought Archie and Veronica were dating. They weren’t right for each other, she told herself.

”How long have you been in town?” She tilts her head, sipping her chocolate milkshake.

”Only a week, but I already feel like I’ve lived here all my life,” Her smile covers her face and you simply smile, not taking any of her words as genuine.

“You can take the girl out of the city, but you can’t take the city out of the girl,” She raises her eyebrows at your remark, pursing her lips slightly. Her eyes scan you as she notices that you aren’t like your brother. You’re more different than you look.

“New York, Upper East Side,” She answers, curing your curiosity. You nod slowly.

”California,” You reply back and she nods her head, looking up at your brother - obviously not quite understanding why you’d left half your family to move to a different state.

“I moved with my mum after the divorce. My parents didn’t want to do the whole custody battle debacle so they decided half of everything, including us,” A sigh falls from your lips as you avoid any eye contact with your brother. You remember the nights leading up to the move when your parents fought over who got Archie, your mum drew the short straw.

”Well, I’d say we’re pretty lucky to have you back. Right, Archiekins?” Veronica elbows my brother as he scratches the back of his head, the tension filling the small booth. You were too consumed in your thoughts to notice that Archie had dipped his head down to whisper something inaudible in her ear.

“I’ll cheers to that,” Everyone lifts there glasses in one swift motion, clinking them together as they reach the middle. You dip your finger into the cream sitting on your shake as the others converse in conversation, too tired to make any effort.

The sounds of laughter and hollering comes for the front of the room as you watch a large swarm of blue and yellow stumble into the diner, curiosity catches your tongue as your eyes trained on the centre of the group as the teens jump their way through the booths - making a ruckus.

”Finally, something good to look at,” Kevin sits upright and nudges you slightly. You break from your trance as you follow his gaze; your eyes lock on the tall raven haired jock, your heart jumping straight into your throat as he catches your gaze, his lips turning up into a smirk and sent to you.

You feel Kevin’s long fingers jab at your sides, ”Why is Reggie staring at you?” 

Your eyes widen, ”Reggie? As in Reggie Mantle?! That’s Reggie?!” You gawk, trying to hide your rosy cheeks. Reggie got hot.

”Oh my god, he’s coming over here,” His eyes pop out of his head as he shakes your arm rapidly, he does his best ‘let’s subtly tell your best friend a cute guy is approaching you’ look.

You jolt upright, knocking over your milkshake glass and spilling it all over your denim shorts. You cuss under your breath and stand from the booth as quickly as you can, trying to get as far away from the boy before he saw you drenched in the chocolate shake.

Your efforts fail as your chucks slip on the tiles and your body goes hurtling toward the floor, only to be saved by a pair of arms. You freeze on the spot as Reggie’s large hands rest on your waistline, his warm fingers touching the exposed skin on your hips - the skin lighting on fire at the embrace. His big brown eyes bore into yours.

”Yo, Reggie,” The boy is ripped from his thoughts and he lifts you up, setting you firmly on the ground. His hands slowly slip from your hips, stuffing them into the pocket of his black denim jeans. You looked both familiar and like a stranger. He couldn’t figure you out. 

“Hey,” He whispers, only loudly enough for you to hear.

”Andrews,” He nods, glancing once at the tall redhead before looking back to you, then back to your brother. You could see the cogs moving in his head as he slowly began to recognise who you were. A laugh escaped his pink lips. He couldn’t believe what he saw. He turns to his group of friends immediately, ”Holy shits, it’s Lyd Left Feet!”

Laughter fills the small diner as the realisation that the dorky thirteen-year-old with the bad dancing was actually the girl standing right in front of them. You reach over and snatch your bag out of the booth, sprinting past the neighbouring booths making a b-line for the front door. You pushed as hard as you could with shaky arms, before colliding with another body.

”Lydia?”

taglist & feeback?: @natalieroseg @isak-lovelies @lena-lightwood @xbobaaa @shadowycomputerrecluse @tinadotexe @sadbreakfastclb @sardonic-jug @mukesbite @asexualmarauder @xxcalignosityxx @bandstripper @cherxnica @neewtmas @ninja-stiles @honeymccall @mccallpackwriter

[weekendwarriorblog]

The Weekend Warrior September 18, 2020 – MR. SOUL!, THE GRIZZLIES, MY NAME IS PEDRO, ANTEBELLUM, THE DEVIL ALL THE TIME, THE NEST, ALONE and More!

Usually, I’d be using this weekend in September to wrap-up my usual week in Toronto for the Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF), though I haven’t gone the past two years and this year, I couldn’t get credentials because… well, who knows? You would think a virtual festival would allow more press, especially since there wouldn’t be the cost for attending, but the demand was greater than the capabilities of TIFF’s video streaming service, I guess. Either way, there are just way too many movies to talk about this week, so let’s get to it.

After sharing some stuff about TIFF… how’s that for a big-time fake-out?

Despite not getting credentials, I did get to watch a few of the movies, including the opening night film, Spike Lee’s movie based on David Byrne’s American Utopia; Chloe Zhao’s Nomadland, reviewed here; Werner Herzog and Clive Oppenheimer’s new doc Fireball: Visitors from Darker Worlds; and I Care a Lot the new film from The Disappearance of Alice Creed director J. Blakeson, starring Rosamund Pike, Peter Dinklage, Eiza Gonzalez and more.

Starting with American Utopia, I wasn’t sure if this Broadway musical would be for me, despite being a life-long Heads fan. It seemed like it could be the definition of a jukebox musical with Byrne just playing his greatest hits and maybe talking in between. That’s exactly what it is, in fact, but it turns out that Byrne is quite a storyteller on stage as he is in music and books. The way that some of the Heads’ oldest tunes have been repurposed for the stage leads to a lively show where everyone on stage is playing an instrument while also singing and dancing. No, there’s no actual narrative or story tying all of the songs together as might normally be the case but the music and stage show more than makes up for it, and Spike Lee (as always) does a grand job capturing it. This will be on HBO on October 18.

Herzog’s latest doc is an interesting one, and a weird one, and one that’s chock-full of eccentric nerds speaking on the topic of meteorites, as Herzog fills the role of narrator and allows Oppenheimer to take center stage in front of the camera, as the duo travels around the world talking to experts on meteors and meteorites, accompanied by gorgeous cinematography and a beautiful score. I’m not sure this may be as immediate as some of Herzog’s Antarctica docs, but it’s another bonafide experience you’ll be able to see on Apple TV+ from November 13.

And that brings me to Blakeson’s I CARE A LOT, a dark crime comedy with an impressive ensemble cast but most of the focus put on Rosamund Pike’s Marla Grayson, a professional guardian and caregiver who has made a fortune preying on the elderly and putting them into retirement homes before cleaning them out of money. Her partner in crime, Fran, is played by Eiza Gonzalez, and things are looking good for them as they are given a “cherry,” in Jennifer Peterson (Dianne Wiest), an old woman with no known connections who just happens to have a fortune in diamonds in a safe deposit boss in the bank. Oh, those also might belong to her estranged son, a crime-boss played by Peter Dinklage, who is outraged by what’s been done to his mother and swears revenge. Listen, these kinds of dark comedies aren’t always for everyone, because it’s really hard to root for Pike’s character, who is about as close to a “hero” as this movie comes. Either way, Blakeson has found a way to milk a rather untapped source in terms of a unique environment for this crime-comedy that ends up working far better than last year’s The Laundromat by Steven Soderbergh, maybe because it’s more about creating interesting characters rather than trying to give audiences a learning moment. (Also, Chris Messina is fantastic in this movie as Dinklage’s lawyer who first confronts Marla, and I’m really starting to see him in a better light as an actor. No idea what’s planned for this one, although it’s distributed by Elevation Pictures in Canada, and they seem to be making a foray into U.S. distribution. (See below)

Also, the New York Film Festival starts this week both virtually and in local drive-ins with opening night being one of three new Steve McQueen films that act as part of his “Small Axe” anthology with Lovers Rock being available to rent for just $25 via the Virtual Cinema starting Thursday. I still haven’t watched anything, as of this writing, but I hope to rectify that soon, so look for some reviews soon.

Before I get to this week’s movies, I do want to say that every once in a while (or maybe twice), I miss a movie or two. Very seldom do I have a chance to write about said movie while it’s still available to watch in theaters (or in this case, digitally), but not this time!

MR. SOUL! is a doc by Melissa Haizlip (co-directed by veteran Spike Lee editor and doc director Sam Pollard, who directed the excellent Two Trains Runnin’) about her uncle Ellis Haizlip, who produced and hosted the semi-long-running PBS show “Soul!” from 1968 to 1973. It was a touchstone for black communities throughout the country for those years, helping to break so many musical artists and poets and other personalities. I found the movie to be quite amazing, mainly since I had never heard of it. I didn’t move to the tri-state region until well after it was off the air, and honestly, I had never even heard of the show or of Ellis Haizlip, so watching his story being told in such a compelling way with so much archival footage, I was pretty blown away. I feel like what Ms. Haizlip and Mr. Pollard did with this movie is as groundbreaking and as important as the James Baldwin doc, I Am Not Your Negro, from a few years back in terms of helping modern-day people, both black and white, understand the black experience of he ‘60s and ‘70s. Mr. Soul! Is now available through Virtual Cinema across the country, and I hope those who enjoy learning new things will give it a look.

Let’s get to all of the new releases… because there’s a TON!

First, I’m gonna start with this week’s “Featured Flick” and yes, that might be considered Mr. Soul!, but the reason I write this column is to call attention to movies you might not have seen otherwise. That’s why I want to draw equal attention to a movie called THE GRIZZLIES (Elevation Pictures), which played at Toronto two years ago and is just now finally being released.

The directorial feature debut by producer Miranda de Pencier, The Grizzlies stars Ben Schnetzer as Russ Shepard, a recent graduate of McGill, who is sent to Kugluktuk at the very Northern ridge of Canada to teach a bunch of Inuit kids, as part of a program to pay back his college tuition. There, he learns that few teens even bother to show up for school, either kept away by their families’ traditions or just their desire to drink and do drugs. This kind of lifestyle inevitably ends to many suicides. Shepard has a hard time getting through to the kids until he realizes that maybe they just need a hobby, so he puts together a group of boys (and one girl) to play lacrosse.

My first year at the Oxford Film Festival (where I saw Sam Pollard’s Two Trains Runnin’), I also saw another excellent doc called Children of the Arctic about the teens from Barrow, Alaska, which is on a similar Northernmost part of the continent where this based-on-a-true-story takes place. Because I’d seen that doc, I was already interested in the setting for what might have otherwise been a typical teacher helps troubled students, not too unlike last week’s John Leguizamo film, Critical Thinking. What differentiates this from many previous movies like this (besides having lacrosse as its white savior sport, rather than chess) is that the setting is so unique, and it allows director Miranda De Pencier to work with a lot of really talented young indigenous actors, many who probably have never acted before. One exception is Boo Boo Stewart as Kyle, one of the kids dealing with domestic abuse from his drunken father.

I also liked Ben Schnetzer, who I wasn’t even remotely familiar with before seeing this, maybe because he had been doing mainly supporting roles; he proves himself to be perfectly capable of being the type of everyman lead we’ve seen other actors to portray. (Ben Affleck in The Way Back from earlier this year comes to mind.) More importantly, Schnetzer is just great with the talented younger cast. Sure, there are a lot of the normal cliches that come with this type of movie including the rousing coach speech to get the team motivated, but there’s no denying that this is one of the better iterations of a what has been a sadly overused movie genre.

I was kind of surprised to learn that this premiered at the Toronto Film Festival two years ago, and it’s just been sitting dormant waiting for someone to pick it up and release it. Actually, I found it quite shocking, because this is an absolutely wonderful and inspirational story that offers some hope in a world that’s gotten so dreary and depressing over the past few months. If you want to see a movie that can get you out of the doldrums, this is definitely one I’d recommend highly. If you can imagine a cross between The Bad News Bears (or even Slapshot) with Whale Rider, then that’s what The Grizzlies delivers.

Another wonderful and equally inspirational film to seek out is Lillian LaSalle’s doc MY NAME IS PEDRO (Sweet 180), which looks at the life and career of South Bronx resident Pedro Santana. The young Latino came from his own troubles going to school in the Bronx to becoming a beloved educator trying to help others using his unique personality and skill set. There’s no denyhing that Santana’s enthusiasm is quite infectious, so he’s quite beloved by everyone he encounters. Unfortunately, he runs into problems, including being systematically booted from his position at the Ramapo school district due to his lack of credentials. He then spends some time teaching in Haiti and gets a job in Dubai but then gets diagnosed with Stage 4 Kidney Cancer. I won’t say more because it’s a movie that, while not particularly ground-breaking in terms of technical aspects, it is indeed quite an inspirational and heartwarming film in the way it tells Pedro’s amazing story. My Name is Pedro will open at the Maysles Center’s Virtual Cinema in New York on Thursday, and then the Laemmle in L.A. on October 2, and then more cities on October 9.

There aren’t a ton of other prominent docs this week, although one of the more high-profile ones is Dawn Hudson’s doc THE WAY I SEE IT (Focus Features), which unfortunately, I received too late to watch and review. (Partially my own fault, to be honest.) It takes a look at two Presidents, Barack Obama and Ronald Reagan as seen through the eyes and lens of renowned photojournalist Pete Souza, who was the official White House photographer and had an unprecedent access to the country’s leaders. The movie will open in select theaters but then will be on MSNBC on Oct. 10 at 10pm Eastern.

Gerard Bush and Christopher Renz’s thriller ANTEBELLUM (Lionsgate) is a movie that’s being released this weekend via VOD after being delayed since April. Honestly, I’m not sure what I can say about it, because it relies so much on its rather ludicrous twist that anyone who watches the trailer can probably figure it out in 15 minutes or less. But I’ll play along. Janelle Monáe plays best-selling author Veronica Henley, who has been having dreams about being back in the Confederate South, working and being abused as a slave by racist soldiers.

We probably should get out of the way that Bush & Renz’s movie actually opens in the Antebellum South on a plantation where we watch a number of slaves being tortured and killed, including Monáe’s Eden and a fellow slave played by the always wonderful Kiersey Clemons from Dope. Jack Huston plays the particularly loathsome Confederate captain who is so awful to them.  About 40 minutes into the movie, we meet Monáe’s Veronica Henley as she wakes from a dream of going through that ordeal we just watched. Got it? So it was all a dream, right? And I bet you really believe that. Again, I promised not to give away the “big twist” but after watching Veronica and her friends (including Gabourey Sidibe from Precious) attending a book conference and Veronica dealing with all sorts of weird people (including Jena Malone in a deliciously evil role) and other strange things, the movie quickly gets tiring. It just takes so long to get to how and why Monáe and the others are on the plantation, and there had to be a better way of making that happen in a more interesting way.

At least the film’s last act turns into a bonafide revenge-filled action thriller, and by then, you’ll be ready to see anything that gets your pulse above a 5. The last 20 minutes are so good you wonder why the filmmakers didn’t seem to care that they were likely to lose people from walking out of theaters – or I guess their homes -- long before the movie gets anywhere worthwhile.

I didn’t watch the trailer for Antebellum until after seeing the movie, but it’s a particularly deceptive piece of work because it says it’s from the “Producer of Get Out and Us,” so you assume (as I did) that this is a movie produced by Jordan Peele or Jason Blum, but neither is involved with it. The trailer also inserts a number of scenes that do not appear in the movie to try to make it seem eerier, and frankly, this being sold as a “horror movie” is probably its biggest infraction. Instead, Antebellum is a weak “Twilight Zone” episode that’s handled so poorly you’re not sure whether to be offended by figuring out the twist almost immediately or offended that these two filmmakers thought they might have you fooled for longer than that. Again, Antebellum is skipping a theatrical release entirely and being released straight to VOD, which is probably for the better.

Antonio Campos, director of Simon Killer and Christine, returns with his adaptation of Donald Ray Pollock’s THE DEVIL ALL THE TIME, which will be streaming on Netflix actually right now! Set in 1957, it stars Tom Holland as Arvin Russell, the son of a religious father (played by Bill Skarsgård) who has come home after seeing all sorts of horrors in World War II. The expansive story follows both father and son but also the residents of a small town called Knockemstiff in Southern Ohio and how they’re all connected through a series of incidents.

Narrated by Pollock himself, Campos has created a brilliant Southern Gothic thriller that’s far more of an ensemble piece than some may expect because the biggest name stars, Tom Holland and Robert Pattinson, don’t appear in the movie for a good 40 minutes! Instead, we follow the story from Arvin’s father Willard and the incidents that lead to Arvin becoming an orphan, living with his half-sister Lenora (Eliza Scanlen). Years later, Arvin finds himself having to protect Lenora from the lecherous young preacher, Preston Teagarden (played by Pattinson), who is preying on the town’s young women. The movie also stars Jason Clarke and Riley Keough, as a couple who pick up hitchhikers for evil intentions, and Sebastian Stan as the latter’s sheriff brother who gets dragged into all the evil-doings in town. It also has Mia Wasikowska and Haley Bennett in smaller roles as two of the beleaguered women caught up in the story.

I went into The Devil All the Time knowing full well that I’m rarely a fan of most Southern-based dramas with a few exceptions, like Dee Rees’ Mudbound. There have been just as many that just didn’t connect with me like Hounddog. Either way, this is a similarly complex tale for Campos to tell because there are so many characters, and it spends quite a bit of time in the past before we finally meet Holland and Pattinson’s characters. This will most definitely annoy some people, but I was intrigued enough by how everyone was being slowly introduced that it didn’t bother me so much.

I’ve always been quite aware how talented a filmmaker Campos is but like with Rebecca and Michael C. Hall in Christine, he also benefits from having one of the strongest ensemble casts put together, as well as great craftspeople -- like cinematographer Lol Crawley -- helping to realize his vision.

It takes its sweet time getting to the point where things start to get interesting, which for many will probably be when Pattinson shows up as Preston Teargarden. At first, I didn’t like Pattinson’s character or performance much, but it certainly grew on me and it’s not the only solid performance of note. Campos has created a movie that gains so much from a second viewing once you know the true nature of the characters. Make no mistake that Campos has kept all the complexities of Pollock’s book for a movie that kept my attention in ways that few other movies have this year with a number of scenes that really shook me up. Besides streaming on Netflix today, The Devil All the Time will actually be opening theatrically in a few cities so check your listings! I interviewed Campos over at Below the Line, and you can read my interview with Cinematographer Lol Crowley over there later today.

As excited as I was to watch a new film from Campos, even MORE exciting, in some ways, is that we’re getting a new movie from his (former?) Borderline Productions partner Sean Durkin, whose Martha Marcy May Marlene was one of the breakouts from Sundance the year it premiered all the way back in 2011. Durkin has returned with THE NEST (IFC Films), a movie starring Jude Law and Carrie Coon as Rory O’Hara and his wife Allison, a married couple with two kids who move back to England for his job, taking up residence in an opulent mansion before things start to fall apart.

I went into The Nest (i.e. I hit play on the screener on my computer) thinking that it was going to be one of those old school British thrillers from the ‘60s and ‘70s, especially once it gets to the giant eerie mansion that reminds you of something from The Omen (one of my favorite horror movies, incidentally). In fact, the movie is more of an intense family drama where we watch Law, Coon and their kids pushed to the edge by circumstances, which one might assume is something being caused by some toxic aspect of their new house, but actually, nope, it’s just everyday life stuff.

For Law’s Rory, it’s a huge deal that falls through as he tries to bullshit his way through it, yet he keeps turning to his wife for money. She has her own problems to deal with including her rebellious stepdaughter Samantha (Oona Roche) and younger son Benjamin (Charlie Shotwell), neither of whom are adjusting well to the move. Her hobby is riding horses, and just bad things keep happening to all of them that all collides on one fateful night that includes Samantha having a crazy house party.

Although The Nest wasn’t nearly as much of a genre movie as I hoped it might be, one thing that really jumps out and makes it worthwhile is Carrie Coon’s performance. There’s no denying she’s just one great role or movie away from being in the Oscar game. Sadly, this one is is not it.

Like the film by Durkin’s producing partner, The Nest takes its own sweet time getting anywhere as Durkin goes for a slow roll approach, but that also allows him to embellish the images with a great score that includes quite a bit of ‘80s music. (I wasn’t sure if the movie actually was taking place in the ‘80s or not.) Although the influence of Stanley Kubrick seems fairly present in Durkin’s The Nest, it’s really more Eyes Wide Shut Kubrick than The Shining, and that might dismay those who are seeking the film’s horror potential. But if you like Eyes Wide Shut and go in expecting that, you won’t be as disappointed.

Another really solid thriller worth seeking out is director John Hyams’ ALONE (Magnet Releasing), which actually played as part of the Fantasia Film Festival a few weeks back. It’s true that there have been way too many movies with that title, but this is a fairly compelling thriller that starts as something that might seem fairly obvious and then goes into so many amazing and unexpected directions. The movie stars Jules Willcox as Jessica, a widow who is moving to a new place when she encounters a creepy guy on the road (played by Marc Menchaca), who seems to be following her. Pretty soon, it’s obvious that he is following her and has bad intentions for her by trapping her in his basement.

Honestly, I wasn’t sure what to expect from Alone, because it starts out so much like The Hitcher or even the recent Unhinged with a woman being plagued by a creepy guy, and it’s hard to watch at times because it gets pretty violent.  I was definitely uncomfortable watching this, since it felt like there was a voyeuristic aspect akin to torture porn that made me not to watch any more of this poor woman's torture and abuse. Fortunately, she does escape only to have to survive while trapped in the woods surrounding the cabin.

I wasn’t familiar with Jules Willcox before seeing this movie, but her performance and all the places it takes her in terms of fear and desperation is fairly impressive, as is Marc Menchaca, who does a great job playing one of those psychopaths who somehow can behave normal whenever it calls for it. (Think more Ted Bundy than Jeffrey Dahmer.) You combine these two amazing performers with a cat-and-mouse situation that combines their acting with some brilliant sound design work and cinematography, and you have a movie that goes far beyond what I expected from the premise.

Even so, Alone successfully explores the real fear women must face every day when they’re alone and feeling defenseless, and it shows Hyams to be an incredibly skilled filmmaker when dealing with a lot of elements. The last act where all of these skills come together, including some amazing stuntwork, is what takes what’s a thriller with an overly used premise and makes it something that’s far more unique and memorable. It will be available to watch in some theaters as well as On Demand.

Speaking of movies with unfortunate title choices, I’m guessing that director Kurtis David Harder was well into making his movie SPIRAL, on Shudder beginning Thursday, when it was announced that the next “Jigsaw” movie from Lionsgate would be called that. Fortunately, this Spiral has nothing to do with that one, the only thing in common is that they’re both horror. (This Spiral actually played at least year’s Brooklyn Horror Film Festival and a few others, in case you weren’t convinced.) In fact, this one is probably more in the vein of Get Out or even Hereditary, as it follows a same-sex couple, Malik and Aaron (Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman, Ari Cohen), who move to the suburbs with Aaron’s teen daughter Kayla (Jennifer Laporte) and begin to experience weird occurrences and behavior from their new neighbors. Of course, Malik thinks it’s homophobia, something he’s experienced in his past when he was put through a horrific experience during his early years exploring his sexuality.

I was pretty impressed with what Harder did with this premise, but just as much due to the performance by Bowyer-Chapman than I was of the director’s ability to build the tension as we learn more and more about the couple’s new suburban neighbors. Spiral is just a really well-done thriller in every regard, because it keeps things rather enigmatic, so you’re never quite sure if Malik’s paranoia is justified or not. Combine that solid premise with a terrific score – definitely one of the themes of this week’s movies – and Spiral is another fantastic offering from the horror streaming network that keeps blowing me away with the movies they pick up that you really can’t see anywhere else.

As luck would have it Harder also produced and co-directed (with Noah Kentis, directing under the pseudonym “Lankyboy”) Summerland, a coming-of-age comedy which I didn’t have a chance to see. (Actually, I did, but from the trailer, it didn’t seem like I’d like it, plus I’ve seen WAY too many coming-of-age movies the last few weeks and I’m getting burnt.) Anyway, this queer coming-of-age indie stars Maddie Phillips (Teenage Bounty Hunters), and it’s a road trip comedy that involves social media (if you remember my review of Spree and read one of my reviews below, that’s another warning sight for me), and it’s available on Demand on iTunes, Vudu, GooglePlay and Amazon right now!

And here’s the trailer!

Noomi Rapace and Joel Kinnaman star in Yuval Adler’s THE SECRETS WE KEEP (Bleecker Street), a thriller set in the late ‘50s with Rapace playing Maya, a Romanian woman living in the suburbs with her doctor husband Lewis (Chris Messina), who thinks that their new neighbor (Joel Kinnaman) may be the Nazi soldier that assaulted and killed her sister during the war, so of course, she kidnaps him.

There’s something very familiar about this dramatic thriller, partially because it takes a similar approach as Bryan Singer’s Apt Pupil, but I feel there were other movies like this that I’m forgetting. The title basically comes from the fact that Maya has kept her past a secret from her husband, who gets involved in the grilling of Kinnaman’s character, who has kept his own past a secret from his wife, played by Amy Seimetz. Even while Kinnaman is tied up in her basement, Maya tries to befriend his wife to see if she can get some information that will prove that her captor is who she thinks.

I’m a pretty big Noomi Rapace fan, and I’m always excited to see her in movies because she tends to be give very dramatic performances, and that’s certainly the case although sometimes, the emotions go a bit overboard. The good thing is that here’s another movie where Chris Messina has really surprised me, just like he did all the way at the top of this column in J. Blakeson’s I Care A Lot. I always found him to be a rather bland and very vanilla actor, but he seems to be doing something to change that, and I fully approve.

There were certainly aspects and moments of The Secrets We Keep I liked because Adler is not a bad director, but there are also aspects that made me feel this would have worked fine or even better as a stage play. As a movie, it’s just kind of drab and predictable as the characters spend almost the entire film yelling and hitting each other. When you compare this to some of the movies above, there just isn’t enough mystery about where it might go, so more like Antebellum than Spiral or Alone despite being a more grounded and less genre-based thriller. Ultimately, it just fails, but it will be in theaters and on VOD starting today.

I knew I was in trouble with Will Wernick’s NO ESCAPE (Vertical)  -- not to be confused with the Owen Wilson-Pierce Brosnan thriller – when I realized that the film’s main character Cole (Keegan Allen) was another one of those social media wannabe stars like the kid in Spree. Surprise, surprise, he is JUST as annoying. The concept for this one is that Cole does all sorts of crazy stunts on his feed to prove he’s not scared of anything, but then he and a group of friends (including his girlfriend Erin, played by Holland Roden) are invited to Russia to take part in the “scariest escape room ever” by a guy named Alexei (Ronan Rubinstein). Bad stuff happens.

There are a few rare times when I watch a movie and wonder how on earth a filmmaker was able to put together what seems like a pretty hefty budget for a movie as bad as this one turned out to be, and stuff like that just leaves me shaking my head. The premise itself isn’t so bad, even if it isn’t particularly original. (Imagine my surprise when I looked at Wernick’s IMDB page and his previous movie from 2017 was called “Escape Room” and not the Sony one either. It makes it pretty clear that this guy is the definition of a one-trick pony. Oddly, he ALSO has a movie called Alone.)

The problem is that Keegan Allen and most of his friends – including his best friend Thomas, played by Denzel Whitaker, who seems to have been doing so well in his career up until this movie – are so effin’ annoying, you never care one bit what happens to them, whether they get beat up in fight with Russian mobsters or end up in a series of death traps, many that are swiped directly from the Saw movies. In fact, that’s basically what this movie turns into once the friends are locked into a Russian prison and Cole has to try to save them. It basically becomes a cross between Saw and Hostel, but with Cole so flippant with his jokes and asides to his watchers, it completely takes away from any tension or scares. By the time the movie starts to get serious, it’s just far too late, because just when you don’t think the movie can possibly get stupider, it gets stupider.  (And seriously, if I have to watch ONE MORE MOVIE that has people commenting or clicking on hearts in a way that’s so unbelievable and unrealistic, I’m gonna be even MEANER to that movie.)

The title of this movie may be No Escape, but there is a perfectly reasonable way to escape this time-waster, and that’s just not to watch it. It’s just another exploitative and predictable movie that lacks anything even remotely approaching originality.

There are a few other movies out this week that I either didn’t get to watch or I watched and just didn’t have enough to say to write a review. Listen, you have nearly 13 reviews above, so is that not enough for you?

Susan Sarandon leads an amazing ensemble cast that includes Kate Winslet, Sam Neill, Mia Wasikowska and more in Roger Michell’s BLACKBIRD (Screen Media), which premiered at the Toronto Film Festival last year and is finally being released. After a Fathom Events release over the last couple days, it will be released in more theaters this Friday. Sarandon plays Lily, a woman who has been battling ALS who has decided to end her life on her own terms, so she and her husband (Neill) summon their daughters (Winslet, Wasikowska) and extended family for one last goodbye to celebrate Lily’s life before she’s gone.

Kieron J. Walsh’s THE RACER (Gravitas Ventures) was supposed to premiere at the SXSW Film Festival earlier this year, but that didn’t happen. It’s set during the summer of 1998 during the early stages of the Tour De France where Belgian rider Dominique Chabol, played by Louis Talpe, has been one of the team’s better support riders on the tour for the past 20 years, his job being merely to set a pace and never to win. When Dom is dropped from the team (for doping), he has to see if he can accept a civilian life after meeting a pretty Irish doctor, played by Tara Lee.

Next up is Steve Collins’ absurdist comedy, I’VE GOT ISSUES (Gravitas Ventures), which includes an amazing cast that includes Macon Blair, Claire Titelman, John Merriman and Byron Brown, with Jim Gaffigan narrating. I knew almost immediately while watching that this movie wasn’t going to be for me, and that’s all I’ll say.

A few of the movies I wasn’t able to get to include Last Call (available through the Alamo Drafthouse Cinema), The Last Laugh (High Octane), Film Movement’s God of the Piano and from Kenya, Sam Soko’s doc Softie about photojournalist Boniface “Softie” Mwangi, which won a Sundance Special Jury prize for its editing. There’s a thing called Google if you wanna know more about them.

My beloved and sadly shuttered local theater, the Metrograph, are continuing their digital live screening series with their Ulrike Ottinger retrospective that will debut her film Joan of Arc of Mongolia  (1989) tonight at 8pm. Friday, they’ll be screening Eric Rohmer’s The Aviator’s Wife (1981) and then continuing the “Nan Goldin Selects” series on Saturday and then Ottinger’s Exile Shanghai (1997)  son Sunday.

Film Forum’s Virtual Cinema will add Jan Oxenberg’s Thank You and Good Night (1991) today and then Jan Swankmaier’s Faust (1994) this Friday.

Next, we’ll look at some streaming stuff. The latest from Ava Duvernay’s Array deal with Netflix is Merawi Gerima’s Residue, which follows Obinna Nwachukwu as aspiring filmmaker Jay, who returns to his home in Washington, DC, to find his neighborhood being gentrified and finds himself being alienated by his old friends. It will debut on Netflix Thursday as well as be available in select virtual theaters. A number of series are starting up on Netflix his week, including Ryan Murphy’s Ratched, starring Sarah Paulson as the Nurse Mildred Ratched character from One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, this series being a prequel to that Oscar-winning film. Netflix is also launching the four-episode docuseries Challenger: The Final Flight, which features interviews with the engineers and crew’s family members from the 1986 shuttle disaster. Lastly, there’s Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous, an all-ages animated series based in the world of the beloved movie franchise.

Over on Hulu, I’m super-psyched for the second season of Pen 15, starring Maya Erskine and Anna Konlkle, which I discovered well after the hilarious first season debuted.

No idea what’s going on next week, but Gerard Butler’s Greenland certainly isn’t! I guess you’ll just have to come back and find out.

[rilenerocks]

Hi Michael. It’s that time of year again. That time you always hated when I was so, so very hot and sweaty and thus, always had the air conditioning turned down, the overhead fan turned to high and the small floor fan churning away all night long. Like living in a wind tunnel, you’d say. I’m sure you wouldn’t be the least bit surprised to learn that nothing’s changed. I climb into our bed, each night, still on my side, yours untouched, with the dull roar of all my cooling machines as my companions. The thin sheet quivers in the breeze. You’d hate it. I’m physically comfortable and I lie there, thinking. Look at this headline from an article I read this evening.

Scientists Have ‘Woken Up’ Microbes Trapped Under The Seafloor For 100 Million Years

I mean, really? While I was trying to wrap my mind around the impossibility of those numbers and the subsequent life options they revealed, I suddenly hoped that meant we had a chance of reuniting somewhere in this mystifying universe. Certainly our collective and relatively young microbes have just as good a chance at survival as those ancient ones. I’m positive that your microbes are all over our house, our garden and in the few personal items of yours which I’ve stashed away. There might be a few hairs in your brush. I wouldn’t care which version of us we’d be, young or old. Ish.

So then I was thinking about all the tiny details of life I’d normally tell you every day when you were still here in the flesh. I mean, I like your constant cosmic presence, but I usually turn to that with just the most important stuff. I’ve been dying to share with you all these strange little nothing thoughts that cross my mind. Mostly, no one has ever been able to put up with the endless stream of seemingly random, disconnected thoughts that pour out of me. My sister, Cheryl is probably the next best listener after you. As my younger sibling, she was well trained in the absorption of my peculiar brain workings. I’m lucky she’s still here. But there’s just nothing like you for that bottomless reservoir of acceptance which  you provided for me. Isn’t it ironic that we both know you’d be appalled by me releasing all this private information into the faceless universe? I mean, I know some people who read my blog but mostly, they’re strangers. Honestly, except for a few private spaces in myself that defy language, most of the rest is just irrelevant in the long run. What impact do our little quirky selves have? I know you’d disagree but I need to survive now, in my own way. So here are a few random thoughts that beset me as I lie in our bedroom, my favorite space, while my mind wanders in the wee hours after I’m done reading, wishing I could talk to you above the whir of the fan blades spinning around me.

You’re the only person who knew that while I was listening to WLS radio during my pubescent and teen years in Chicago, I wasn’t just a rock and roll/rhythm and blues kid. I also liked gospel, jazz and classical music. I still remember that when you were working at the Record Service, you kept track of my favorites and made sure I always those albums in my stash. And then, you updated them to CD’s so I didn’t have to wear out my vinyl. I’m still listening to lots of different genres every day. I don’t think I could’ve gotten through this bizarre pandemic time without it.

Here’s another weird thing I’ve noticed lately. I don’t watch much television during the day. I turn it on for a few minutes when I get up in the morning, mostly a defensive move to make sure nothing impossibly earth-shattering happened overnight. That’s how things are right now – every day seems to bring a story that’s incomprehensible. Today the story was that after the worst economic quarter ever reported since they started measuring these things, Trump suggested that perhaps we shouldn’t hold an election this fall. This guy will sling any idea that he thinks will get him a second term. As an historian, you just wouldn’t believe how this country has devolved since you’ve been gone. Anyway. When evening rolls around, I’m tired from being outside most of the day. After dinner, I watch the news and then scroll through the tv guide, looking for anything that might distract me, amuse me or otherwise edify me in some way. Lately, I’ve realized that virtually every day, The Godfather, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off or Gladiator is playing. Often they’re on at the same time, while other times, they’re staggered. It’s so peculiar. Usually I watch bits of all of them. By the end of the week I’ve seen them in their entirety, albeit out of order. I’ll also pause for Sense and Sensibility, The Princess Bride, Pride and Prejudice or any Errol Flynn movie. Makes me laugh. If you were here, you’d be doing the same thing with The American President, To Have and to Have Not, You’ve Got Mail or The Maltese Falcon. Also Goodfellas, A Bronx Tale, or Stand by Me. I’m working my way through a decent number of tv series that I missed when we were too busy to watch them. But recently, I’m needing revolution. I’ve got “Z” and Battle of Algiers on my DVR. I probably don’t need to get more cranked up than I am these days, but I guess that’s too bad. Watching them anyway. I wonder how any new shows will be made for the fall? Better not go down that rabbit hole. They’re probably not going to happen.  

I want you to know that in your honor, I have loyally kept up with a smaller version of your food garden. Not just the perennial herbs that still marvelously appear and make me feel that it’s you who’s emerging through our rich dirt. That’s kind of absurd because your ashes are sitting in a beautiful box in the house waiting to some day being mingled with mine. Then we can be in the garden together. That aside, I’ve also been diligently planting and nurturing the annual herbs and vegetables, although at the moment, I’m losing the vegetable battle with the squirrels and rabbits. I’ve managed to get about two dozen cherry tomatoes off the vines while I try to ignore the smushed ones on the ground with one bite mark taken before abandonment. All the low-hanging large tomatoes have been filched along with the green peppers. I’m holding out hope for ones that are a little higher on the vines.

I’m really missing your cooking, though. Yesterday, I started ferreting around your recipe folders and dug out the one for pesto which, by the way,  wasn’t labeled. I’m going to make it. I don’t have as much basil as you would plant so I don’t expect to be spooning the mixture into ice cube trays that we could pop out of the freezer for pastas and pizzas. But I’m going to get it done. You really spoiled me. The good news is that I knew it and let you know. So there’s that.

Meanwhile, I’m being really mindful about enjoying every bloom in my flower world. I wait impatiently to make sure that my perennials return and get so happy when they show up. Then I try not to get sad because soon they’ll be gone. That’s something I have to work on – if I’ve learned anything, I know I need to stay in the present. So I’m out there a lot, with the butterflies and the birds, chasing them around with my phone to get good photos that I hope will be comforting in what I expect will be a socially distanced winter.  

Regarding the birds. So far, since spring, there’ve been 50 species in the yard. I don’t know if you’d recall that I started drawing them and filing them in a binder called The Yardbirds. I know you’d get the music reference. Anyway, my renderings are improving. If I practice, I’ll get better. Here are a couple of my recent ones.

I’m really happy that I’ve created a great bird habitat in the yard. I’m learning a lot about their behavior. I love watching the hummingbirds and the house wrens. Tiny, but mighty. I’ve grown fond of catbirds which are showing up regularly at the feeders. They’re perky and curious and pretty brave.

I’ve done something pretty dumb, as getting attached to wild animals doesn’t bode well for a happy emotional outcome. But I’m very fond of the cardinal pair that lives here year-round. After a rousing rescue of one of their fledglings last week, I felt so familial with them that I decided to name the strikingly beautiful female who comes for here daily for a dip in the birdbath. I’m calling her Pumpkin. Now, how absurd is that? I like her boyfriend too.

Another thing I did after a good deal of thought was sell your beloved bike. That was hard for me. I know it was just a thing but you loved it so much. I heard your voice in my head saying, “don’t be ridiculous – it’s just sitting there being wasted. Get yourself some extra cash.” So I did. But I took photos first. All these things I have to do. When I lie in bed in the night, I think about how much easier it is to share the loads of life. I miss that a lot although I’m glad I have what it takes to manage on my own. I think back to my mom after my dad died. By the time she was my age, she’d been dependent on me for almost 5 years. Makes me shudder.

How could I not tell you this most important thing? Our daughter, who went from working remotely to having to appear in person in a closed courtroom, found out the other day that a court clerk had tested positive for Covid19. She was asked to leave her office, get tested and do another 14 day quarantine. Then the judge in charge pf hearing her cases tested positive as well. Ugh. That meant that all the rest of our little family bubble had to be tested too. So far, she and our son got negative results. Our son-in-law, both grandsons and I await our results. I hope we’re all negative and can resume our little intimate enclave. The months ahead look daunting to me. The virus is traversing the country at will with no definitive treatments or vaccines. I dread flu season adding to the complexity of everything. Feels positively medieval.

  In other news, I got an email from the park district informing us that the indoor pool was reopening immediately. The list of precautions and requirements is very long and detailed. I read it carefully while keenly aware of my longing to get back to swimming. In the end, I’ve decided against it. I just don’t think being in an indoor facility shared with high school students can be safe enough for someone like me, a member of what I call the “death group.” So I’ll just have to know that a block and a half from our house, people will be paddling away while I won’t. This adult decision-making of risk vs. reward is overrated.

In other news, I actually wish I was more like my mom in her widowhood. She used to talk a lot about how all she wished she could do was hold my dad’s hand one more time. Lucky her. I remain deeply interested in resuming our intimate life for another 30 years or so. I hope if this reaches you, you’ll be glad to know that some of our best things are strong enough to survive death.

So that’s all for tonight. By the way, I thought you should know that I just restlessly flipped on the television. There is Gladiator in the midst of the re-creation of the battle of Carthage. Round and round it goes, my dearest boy. Until next time.

A Message from the Wind Tunnel Hi Michael. It’s that time of year again. That time you always hated when I was so, so very hot and sweaty and thus, always had the air conditioning turned down, the overhead fan turned to high and the small floor fan churning away all night long.

[thededicatedscientist]

hey if you dont mind a mun question, how do you recommend making a strong and prosperous askblog...? i know there's no one formula, but do you have any tips?

((Hey! Thanks for your ask. I hope I can be of help to you somehow, but to be honest, I pretty much stumbled my way into all this, haha! I do have some tips I could give you, as well as some character development techniques that have inspired me over the years. I hope this helps you!

-Before I started the blog, I looked to other ask blogs for guidance on how an ask blog should look and function. I examined their designs, how their ways of responding to asks varied, and cherry-picked my favourite ideas. The DS blog is very much influenced by blogs such as ask-GasterWD, thatonegojimun’s Gaster ask blog, and even ask6amzee. I liked the freedom offered by comic responses, but I knew I wouldn’t always have the time and energy to make a comic for every ask I received. So I took inspiration from Goji and created a collection of expressions. That’s why there are so many more expressions posts than comics posts: I just don’t have the time to make art for every response! That’s definitely something you should keep in mind when making an ask blog. How can you balance time, effort and quality in a way that satisfies you? You, not your followers.

-Once you’ve decided on your design, lay the ground rules. Protect yourself. That sounds serious, but I am being serious. Tumblr can be a stressful place to draw a lot of attention to yourself. As soon as your blog is created, make the Rules page. Right away. Mine clearly states that this blog is SFW only, selective and plot-driven, and I’ve stated my preferred ask format. Honestly, my rules are very lenient, and I really should expand them! I operate by the three strikes rule: if any follower violates my terms three times, they’re blocked. If someone does something really awful, they’re blocked immediately, regardless of strikes. I recommend you do the same. You’re not being mean, you’re not being a dick, you’re protecting yourself - and your followers! Know your audience: I know that the vast majority of my followers are teens and minors, and I have to keep that in mind when posting and sharing content on this blog. I try to avoid profanity and R-rated content as much as possible. Gaster has cursed once, I admit, but it was a relatively tame word masked in the Wingdings font. Still, I’ve avoided profanity since, as I’m very wary of negatively influencing my young audience. Setting up rules, allowing myself to hit that block button whenever I need to, and deleting unwanted comments and reblogs has kept me sane and stress-free while managing this blog. The happier you are, the better your blog will be.-Spend time developing your blog’s main draw: its character. Say you want to make a Gaster ask blog for example: what can you bring to the character that is exciting, interesting and new? I often receive asks form followers saying they haven’t seen another Gaster quite like him. I am very grateful for this, but I wouldn’t call my Gaster a totally “unique” design. But he stands out. Uniqueness isn’t the be-all and end-all of good character design; I’ve seen too many of my friends torture themselves over their “unoriginal” character designs, like the word unoriginal is a death sentence for their character. I ask you to not be afraid of this. So long as your character has that spark, that something that brings them to life, you’re on the right track.

-Content is important too. Jokes always help. If you can bring the funny, you’re more likely to attract people who will enjoy and share your content. Best of all, you might just brighten someone’s day. I can’t recommend that highly enough: it’s a great feeling when someone tells you your silly little ask blog made their day better.

-You also need to be prepared to work with the character for a long time. If you’re going to draw them, make sure their design is one you can stand drawing over and over again. If I can build a personal connection between myself and my character, chances are I will still be inspired to work with the character even years down the line. For example, DSGaster is inspired by a character archetype I thoroughly enjoy: the polite, stoic British man at the end of his tether and desperately trying to bite back his frustration! I suppose I enjoy this because I can relate. I don’t always handle anger very well; I’m the type that often leaps straight from being frustrated to sad. I don’t give myself enough outlets for my anger. I enjoy Gaster because he does not have this problem, and it allows me to explore and express anger in a way that is safe, doesn’t hurt anyone, and is often entertaining and funny! That helps me, and keeps me coming back to the character.

-Plus, flat out? Helps to be part of an active fandom for a popular franchise. Popularity does factor into this, let’s not kid ourselves!

I’VE TALKED A LOT so I’ll stop here. I do hope this helps you! If there’s anything I’ve not covered or anything else you’re curious about, please feel free to ask me. 

Best of luck! c: ))

[rilenerocks]

Hi Michael. It’s that time of year again. That time you always hated when I was so, so very hot and sweaty and thus, always had the air conditioning turned down, the overhead fan turned to high and the small floor fan churning away all night long. Like living in a wind tunnel, you’d say. I’m sure you wouldn’t be the least bit surprised to learn that nothing’s changed. I climb into our bed, each night, still on my side, yours untouched, with the dull roar of all my cooling machines as my companions. The thin sheet quivers in the breeze. You’d hate it. I’m physically comfortable and I lie there, thinking. Look at this headline from an article I read this evening.

Scientists Have ‘Woken Up’ Microbes Trapped Under The Seafloor For 100 Million Years

I mean, really? While I was trying to wrap my mind around the impossibility of those numbers and the subsequent life options they revealed, I suddenly hoped that meant we had a chance of reuniting somewhere in this mystifying universe. Certainly our collective and relatively young microbes have just as good a chance at survival as those ancient ones. I’m positive that your microbes are all over our house, our garden and in the few personal items of yours which I’ve stashed away. There might be a few hairs in your brush. I wouldn’t care which version of us we’d be, young or old. Ish.

So then I was thinking about all the tiny details of life I’d normally tell you every day when you were still here in the flesh. I mean, I like your constant cosmic presence, but I usually turn to that with just the most important stuff. I’ve been dying to share with you all these strange little nothing thoughts that cross my mind. Mostly, no one has ever been able to put up with the endless stream of seemingly random, disconnected thoughts that pour out of me. My sister, Cheryl is probably the next best listener after you. As my younger sibling, she was well trained in the absorption of my peculiar brain workings. I’m lucky she’s still here. But there’s just nothing like you for that bottomless reservoir of acceptance which  you provided for me. Isn’t it ironic that we both know you’d be appalled by me releasing all this private information into the faceless universe? I mean, I know some people who read my blog but mostly, they’re strangers. Honestly, except for a few private spaces in myself that defy language, most of the rest is just irrelevant in the long run. What impact do our little quirky selves have? I know you’d disagree but I need to survive now, in my own way. So here are a few random thoughts that beset me as I lie in our bedroom, my favorite space, while my mind wanders in the wee hours after I’m done reading, wishing I could talk to you above the whir of the fan blades spinning around me.

You’re the only person who knew that while I was listening to WLS radio during my pubescent and teen years in Chicago, I wasn’t just a rock and roll/rhythm and blues kid. I also liked gospel, jazz and classical music. I still remember that when you were working at the Record Service, you kept track of my favorites and made sure I always those albums in my stash. And then, you updated them to CD’s so I didn’t have to wear out my vinyl. I’m still listening to lots of different genres every day. I don’t think I could’ve gotten through this bizarre pandemic time without it.

Here’s another weird thing I’ve noticed lately. I don’t watch much television during the day. I turn it on for a few minutes when I get up in the morning, mostly a defensive move to make sure nothing impossibly earth-shattering happened overnight. That’s how things are right now – every day seems to bring a story that’s incomprehensible. Today the story was that after the worst economic quarter ever reported since they started measuring these things, Trump suggested that perhaps we shouldn’t hold an election this fall. This guy will sling any idea that he thinks will get him a second term. As an historian, you just wouldn’t believe how this country has devolved since you’ve been gone. Anyway. When evening rolls around, I’m tired from being outside most of the day. After dinner, I watch the news and then scroll through the tv guide, looking for anything that might distract me, amuse me or otherwise edify me in some way. Lately, I’ve realized that virtually every day, The Godfather, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off or Gladiator is playing. Often they’re on at the same time, while other times, they’re staggered. It’s so peculiar. Usually I watch bits of all of them. By the end of the week I’ve seen them in their entirety, albeit out of order. I’ll also pause for Sense and Sensibility, The Princess Bride, Pride and Prejudice or any Errol Flynn movie. Makes me laugh. If you were here, you’d be doing the same thing with The American President, To Have and to Have Not, You’ve Got Mail or The Maltese Falcon. Also Goodfellas, A Bronx Tale, or Stand by Me. I’m working my way through a decent number of tv series that I missed when we were too busy to watch them. But recently, I’m needing revolution. I’ve got “Z” and Battle of Algiers on my DVR. I probably don’t need to get more cranked up than I am these days, but I guess that’s too bad. Watching them anyway. I wonder how any new shows will be made for the fall? Better not go down that rabbit hole. They’re probably not going to happen.  

I want you to know that in your honor, I have loyally kept up with a smaller version of your food garden. Not just the perennial herbs that still marvelously appear and make me feel that it’s you who’s emerging through our rich dirt. That’s kind of absurd because your ashes are sitting in a beautiful box in the house waiting to some day being mingled with mine. Then we can be in the garden together. That aside, I’ve also been diligently planting and nurturing the annual herbs and vegetables, although at the moment, I’m losing the vegetable battle with the squirrels and rabbits. I’ve managed to get about two dozen cherry tomatoes off the vines while I try to ignore the smushed ones on the ground with one bite mark taken before abandonment. All the low-hanging large tomatoes have been filched along with the green peppers. I’m holding out hope for ones that are a little higher on the vines.

I’m really missing your cooking, though. Yesterday, I started ferreting around your recipe folders and dug out the one for pesto which, by the way,  wasn’t labeled. I’m going to make it. I don’t have as much basil as you would plant so I don’t expect to be spooning the mixture into ice cube trays that we could pop out of the freezer for pastas and pizzas. But I’m going to get it done. You really spoiled me. The good news is that I knew it and let you know. So there’s that.

Meanwhile, I’m being really mindful about enjoying every bloom in my flower world. I wait impatiently to make sure that my perennials return and get so happy when they show up. Then I try not to get sad because soon they’ll be gone. That’s something I have to work on – if I’ve learned anything, I know I need to stay in the present. So I’m out there a lot, with the butterflies and the birds, chasing them around with my phone to get good photos that I hope will be comforting in what I expect will be a socially distanced winter.  

Regarding the birds. So far, since spring, there’ve been 50 species in the yard. I don’t know if you’d recall that I started drawing them and filing them in a binder called The Yardbirds. I know you’d get the music reference. Anyway, my renderings are improving. If I practice, I’ll get better. Here are a couple of my recent ones.

I’m really happy that I’ve created a great bird habitat in the yard. I’m learning a lot about their behavior. I love watching the hummingbirds and the house wrens. Tiny, but mighty. I’ve grown fond of catbirds which are showing up regularly at the feeders. They’re perky and curious and pretty brave.

I’ve done something pretty dumb, as getting attached to wild animals doesn’t bode well for a happy emotional outcome. But I’m very fond of the cardinal pair that lives here year-round. After a rousing rescue of one of their fledglings last week, I felt so familial with them that I decided to name the strikingly beautiful female who comes for here daily for a dip in the birdbath. I’m calling her Pumpkin. Now, how absurd is that? I like her boyfriend too.

Another thing I did after a good deal of thought was sell your beloved bike. That was hard for me. I know it was just a thing but you loved it so much. I heard your voice in my head saying, “don’t be ridiculous – it’s just sitting there being wasted. Get yourself some extra cash.” So I did. But I took photos first. All these things I have to do. When I lie in bed in the night, I think about how much easier it is to share the loads of life. I miss that a lot although I’m glad I have what it takes to manage on my own. I think back to my mom after my dad died. By the time she was my age, she’d been dependent on me for almost 5 years. Makes me shudder.

How could I not tell you this most important thing? Our daughter, who went from working remotely to having to appear in person in a closed courtroom, found out the other day that a court clerk had tested positive for Covid19. She was asked to leave her office, get tested and do another 14 day quarantine. Then the judge in charge pf hearing her cases tested positive as well. Ugh. That meant that all the rest of our little family bubble had to be tested too. So far, she and our son got negative results. Our son-in-law, both grandsons and I await our results. I hope we’re all negative and can resume our little intimate enclave. The months ahead look daunting to me. The virus is traversing the country at will with no definitive treatments or vaccines. I dread flu season adding to the complexity of everything. Feels positively medieval.   In other news, I got an email from the park district informing us that the indoor pool was reopening immediately. The list of precautions and requirements is very long and detailed. I read it carefully while keenly aware of my longing to get back to swimming. In the end, I’ve decided against it. I just don’t think being in an indoor facility shared with high school students can be safe enough for someone like me, a member of what I call the “death group.” So I’ll just have to know that a block and a half from our house, people will be paddling away while I won’t. This adult decision-making of risk vs. reward is overrated.In other news, I actually wish I was more like my mom in her widowhood. She used to talk a lot about how all she wished she could do was hold my dad’s hand one more time. Lucky her. I remain deeply interested in resuming our intimate life for another 30 years or so. I hope if this reaches you, you’ll be glad to know that some of our best things are strong enough to survive death. So that’s all for tonight. By the way, I thought you should know that I just restlessly flipped on the television. There is Gladiator in the midst of the re-creation of the battle of Carthage. Round and round it goes, my dearest boy. Until next time.

A Message from the Wind Tunnel Hi Michael. It’s that time of year again. That time you always hated when I was so, so very hot and sweaty and thus, always had the air conditioning turned down, the overhead fan turned to high and the small floor fan churning away all night long.