#i was actually gonna quit NB at the end of this year so i guess my plans didn't change...

[bfwonho]

AITA but i dont wanna use reddit

ok you know what here is the situation. my (only recently) 20 yr old friend (i met them four years ago when we both worked at mcd) lived with their strict, emotionally abusive, overprotective parents until recently. their parents would confiscate tech for yrs at a time, wouldn't let them get vaccinated (i had to help them do that), guilt and shame them, etc. also obviously homophobic and my friend is transfem nb and queer. theyre also the eldest sibling of quite a few and had to handle the pressure of that responsibility and their parents never wanted them to do normal things like getting a car and moving out. i was always there encouraging them even when we stopped working together bc i was like fuck this naive gullible homeschooled kid has no one and they remind me of my younger sibling and im gonna be there for them as much as i can. the only reason they even got a car eventually is cus i kept telling them to so they cld move out

cut back to barely a year ago, they're still so naive and gullible they've lent like 1k+ to ppl who won't pay them back, but they still have like 10-20k in savings and now their own car. they also get into digital art with my help and get into furry porn or whatever. im like ok i guess ur an adult now do what u want. and then theyre like "ive got an online partner from CANADA!!! (we r australian) don't freak out i know it's bad but he's 30." i'm like oh god. they've been together 3 months ish and my friend RLY wants to visit their fuckass boyfriend and i'm like please be careful, please wait at least a year, i know u wont wanna listen to how i rly feel about this but at least just take these precautions. i'm also like when you do meet irl he should come here ur barely 19 and he's 30 like it only makes sense. and theyre like "thank u i promise i will do that"

and then maybe 10 or 11 months into their relationship i find out my friend is in canada with their bf, and has been for like a month, and i only know this bc they're asking if i can pick them up from sydney airport. im like errr that's pretty far away but take the train and i'll pick you up from the station and they're like ok sure! and i ask a bit more about it and find out they believe their parents have been hacking into their laptop because why else would they be suspicious that this canadian guy is their boyfriend, i'm like actually no offense but it's really fucking obvious i don't think they did that... and they're like "yeah anyway my parents are no longer picking me up which is why i need a lift, i admitted i have a boyfriend and they're calling him a pedo (and i almost agree but i just smile and nod) and so i'm not going back and taking their bs anymore, i'm gonna sleep in my car if i have to" so i offer for them to stay at my place for a few weeks.

they go get their stuff from their place, i buy them a pizza cus they havent had dinner, i help them get their stuff inside, set up a temporary bed. they tell me they plan to be out within a few days, i tell them they can stay longer if they need to, but currently their only job is doordash and they should focus on getting a real job so they can find a place and i'm more than happy to help them find somewhere. theyre the type of person to say sorry for everything and not let themselves ever feel comfortable, so i make sure they know they can use the kitchen and bathroom and everything while they're here and to not feel like a huge burden, im gonna be charging them a tiny bit of rent anyway so yeah.

now tell me why it's been over a month, they've applied to only a few places, i specifically put in a good word with them at my job and told them to call back and ask about the application and they just haven't, they've just been doordashing and filling my entire fridge and cupboard with their food, i tell them to use the laundromat cus we don't have enough space for their washing too and they end up asking if they can use our washing machine anyway (i reluctantly say yes), they destroy all my kitchen sponges on washing this one shitty pan i have cus they have to cook an entire grand meal from scratch for breakfast lunch and dinner, they wash up but i'm the only person who cleans the floors and the bathroom so now i'm feeling cramped and stressed out...

i ask my mum about what to do, she says give them 2 weeks to move out, my mum is a guarantor on my lease so in the group chat i explain the situation and say they have 2 weeks, they NEVER RESPOND and start not coming home until late at night... i'm considering moving into another place with a friend atp so i'm like yo maybe you can get on this lease and THEN they respond and start showing up again... and today i called and updated mum on the situation and her partner got on the phone, me and my sibling only got this place cus he apparently called in a favour cus we were rly struggling to find any fucking housing, and so he says "tell him i mean THEMMM if theyre not out tomorrow i will forcibly remove them" and so my sibling makes sure to tell them this face to face so they cant avoid actually responding. i also find out today that this whole time they've been flat broke (to the point they had to borrow my money just to get petrol despite doordashing like 40 hours a week) because they HAVE BEEN HELPING. PAY. THEIR GROWN ASS. SHITTY FUCKING USELESS. PARTNERS. RENT. THIS GROWN ASS MAN NOT ONLY HAD THEM PAY TO GO SEE HIM AND SUCK HIM OFF AND COOK FOR HIM. NOT ONLY WAS LETTING THEM GO BACK TO AUSTRALIA AND JUST BE HOMELESS. BUT HE IS ACTIVELY TAKING THEIR FUCKING MONEY. despite all of this i am deep down INCREDIBLY GLAD that my mum's partner put his foot down to get them out of my house and i feel guilty about it despite risking eviction cus im breaking my lease agreement by having them here loooll

tldr my 20 yr old friend has been living in my house illegally for over a month bc they refuse to go back to their shitty parents, they are however broke and don't have a stable job and their 30 yr old boyfriend is leeching off of them, and now i'm essentially kicking them out of my place within 2 days because my own housing security is at risk

[ineadhyn]

Writer interview

@vixstarria tagged me and I finally get to do it! Thank you <3

I am tagging @sky-kiss @scuttlingcrab and @thedomesticanthropologist

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

13 and some are multi-chapter. All are BG3 except for a german Inkheart one

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

85.408 -that is a surprising amount of words for being active less than a year

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

His consort, his god - I finally wrote smut for a popular ship XD (bloodweave)

At her mercy - kinky sapphic Karlach x Durge smut

Natures most beloved treasure - Halsin x trans masc Tav smut

Direct from Hell Logistics - ongoing Raphael x Haarlep comedy/angst/smut/plot - this one has it all

A song of snow and embers and Copper Hearts share this place. one is a F/F/F/F foursome and the other my Astarion x male Tav longfic

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I appreciate every single comment and try to show that. There's nothing better than the e-mail that says "comment on your work" and it can make my whole day. Sometimes I don't know what to respond if it's just a word or a keybord smash, but rest assured I see you and I love every one of those, too.

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Angsty ending hmmmm. Because some of my stuff is not completed yet I am not gonna spoil anything but Dust and ash about Astarion's backstory was naturally quite angsty

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Not. gonna. spoil XD

7. Do you write crossovers?

Not yet. Maybe I could count Copper hearts because I took Francys from my original work and planted him into Bg3

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No, not yet.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do. I am exploring all kinds atm with preferably queer pairings wlw or mlm or nb. I can also write mlw from the men's perspective but not the other way round :D

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Boy I wish.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No and I am not sure if I could commit to a project like that.

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Hmmmmm ... Raphlep probably

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

My german Inkheart fic with a genderbent lesbian Basta. Damn I was invested in creating this character, but gave up after a while because it was a lot of work and it being german and a niche topic in a small fandom was not very rewarding tbh. I know I should not care and maybe I'll come back to it when the Inkheart obsession comes over me again.

15. What are your writing strengths?

I am good at setting the scene. Atmosphere and small mundane details that make the setting feel alive. I have always liked that in reading as in writing, because it makes you feel like you are actually there when you can hear and smell and taste the scene.

Also I am okay at developing coherent plot, but that's mainly practice from writing a lot of og work before I started with fics.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

I still struggle with english grammar and punctuation at times so I always have a beta reader. And I am lucky to have great ones.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I am not a fan. It confuses me. Singular phrases and such yes, but not entire dialogue. Especially if it's german in an english fic I get super confused.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

*digs through her files* So, my first works were basically fic for my best friend's story. (I was in my early teens.) But since she was the author the lines between canon and fic are blurry and the "fandom" consisted of three people of which one was the author XD

So if we don't count that the first one would be Hunger Games - It was one chapter and I never published it

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

We'll see what posesses me next I guess, though I think Bg3 will stay with me for a considerable amount of time. And ship wise ... I feel Durgetash creeping up on me.

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Definitely Direct from Hell Logistics. I am having so much fun with it. It constantly makes me laugh and sheme and I also feel all the angst. Also it is ongoing and I get to explore the story alongside the readers (though I have a rough plot structure to keep me on track).

[supreme-burrito]

Since Obey Me is on trending I guess I can give my initial thoughts about it since I’ve went through the first chapter already.

I am so out of touch with the new Tiktok thing

I really hope that the rhythm game continues to be based on skill first and card power second because I swear to Michael if there is a power creep that requires money I will quit.

I say this because I’m pretty decent when it comes to basic rhythm games. I got all S’s and a few perfects in the first chapter.

The new Wandering mechanic is very cute

On that note I guess I should talk about the characters and the plot (so far). I only got to level 50ish in the lessons on Obey Me so I don’t know the full story but Nightbringer (NB) did a decent job covering those bases with what I can only assume (I will have to do the opening again on another account) is having two completely different openings play out depending on what answer you have to Barbatos at the beginning when he shows you this photo

I said ‘no’ and got taken down a path of amnesia until Solomon showed up and told me how everything at the end of Obey Me went down and this is where I went ‘haha WHAT THE FUCK’

1. Apparently MC currently is a demon with magical powers who is Solomon’s apprentice which brings up so many questions about the sorcerer’s society that popped up in Chapter 3

2. Solomon has a pact with Barbie and can just travel through time (yes, I will continue to refer to Barbatos as Barbie). So he DEFINITELY has his hands shoved deep into the pie of the plot. He’s probably also the reason of why King Yama is not around. (No school, no MC, no shenanigans) Also if it can be inferred from the opening, Solomon’s had a pact with Barbie first (aka this whole time) and Asmo is literally his side hoe.

3. Lucifer is definitely a lot less…strict? But he does tell us that he has severe trust issues at the end of Chapter 1 and doesn’t even trust us. Lucifer has always had a lot of trust issues but depending on how we re-activate our pacts and how the scene is playing, I can only guess that Lucifer is gonna be first and Satan is gonna be last. Like, we just pulled up to the club and Diavolo is making me and wittle Wucifer founding members of his soon to be demon school, which Lucifer has a valid point that since we just got here that we. cannot. be. trusted. Diavolo says he has a sixth sense that we are chill and makes us the brothers’ “attendant” aka demon babysitter and we are forced to live with Solomon in an abandoned building when he shows up.

3.1. On a side note, since the game is super meta with returning players knowing all the undertones of the current events of Nightbringer (Lucifer being in a pact-like status with Diavolo on account of saving their lives when they fell and Lilith being “dead”). I’m very curious as to how this is all shared with us again. I will give the game back a point for making MC a demon because Belphegor would have murdered us on the spot if we were a human.

But that brings up another question: are we gonna be the ones who locks Belphie up in the attic and not Lucifer due to meta knowledge? Because the only way to unlock the attic door was by making pacts with six out of the seven brothers. Initially in OM, MC is very hesitant to do this. But with this possible speculation, it brings up so many questions. I get the devs did not see this oversight of time travel four years ago when they were making the original game, but please for the love of Michael at least keep the plot consistent, especially with all this meta knowledge returning players have at their disposal.

No seriously Mammon has already taken the credit card, I suggested to him that he hide it in the freezer and Lucifer liked that response.

4. When the game makes me a demon babysitter, it is to be assumed for all seven brothers. Lucifer says (and probably thinks) otherwise.

Consensual workplace relationship

5. RACISM

6. We’ve all been lied to. This is actually Henry’s origin story and he is the main character.

7. Satan is one angry little bitch. Currently at this point we have no clue as to why he is like this and I’m intrigued to find out how it is explained

Despite the micro transactions immediately getting shoved in my face right from the get go, I really really hope that it continues to be f2p friendly unlike the original game.

[jaypsnax]

Alright then, to take it from the top... here’s some things I’ve done here or there for this dang game, from oldest to newest. With a big chunk of months starting with the margin Floofty there. Much is traditional and such, which is not my most practiced medium. Details on each below, just because I like over-explaining and it helps my nerves about posting.

1st: Fairly certain this Gramble is the first thing I did that was OK enough to show. Or, at least close to the first. He was one of my favorites and still is for his kindness(though he also can be really mean and paranoid, also a reason why I like him), so I wanted to get around to em. Also he’s very cute, I love my little malewife. I wanna scoop him up and hold him. Trouble is, Gramble has to have some of the most awkward proportions I’ve yet experienced while trying to draw a grumpus, I swear. That, and the more I looked at it, the more I grew to be unhappy with it. That generally applies to basically all of the drawings from last year, I find them to be “eh” at best. But it is what it is. 2nd: Second up is Flooftyyy, my most favorite. Intelligent, well-spoken, morally ambiguous, NB... and an asshole. But one with a cause they believe in that’s ultimately well intentioned, which they’ll go to self-destructive lengths to fulfill. And it’s clear they struggle to really get a grasp on how to treat people and have learned to cope with their frustration by shutting everyone out and believing them to be ignorant. While still obviously playing favorites between Eggabell and Triffany :p But by the end of the game, they’re learning that in order to really do what they want, they’ve got to really try and understand others. They’re the sort that I’d love to keep following to see their development. The awkwardness, the uncomfortable apologies and attempts at empathizing or opening up, the potential for blossoming relationships and a connection with others that, maybe, they’ve never quite experienced before. Their character is one that’s kind of close to my heart for being interesting and also quite similar to one I made and roleplayed for years. Add in the fact they’re NB and that just sealed the deal, that’s some fucking gender goddamn euphoria right there. So I had to draw them. 3rd: This one also mostly falls under the same explanation as above, except it was an effort as really figuring out grumpus bodies and proportions and stuff. Albeit in the form of solely Floofty, but my mental bandwidth for anything more than a drawing or two at a time is zilch. After that I’m spent. It was the first thing that I felt even marginally satisfied with, however.... I just feel like I’m in danger when looking at it. Like I’m gonna lose my way of things and habits I’ve built now from observing it too closely. Did keep the eyes, however. Kind of. 4th: To be real w you I just felt like drawing a Filbo after seeing a Filbo. He’s cute and I’d put a smooch on his dumb little head. Also more practice w grump stuff, but with some intentional attempts at stylization. I guess it didn’t stick, but who knows, maybe I could pick some of it back up?  5th: THE FIRST NEW DRAWING FROM A FEW DAYS AGO and it’s FLOOFTY, of course. It’s not really the first, there’s a few other things before it, but they suck so... yeah. I’d crawled out of the Bugsnax hole somewhat after a few months and failing to really do anything I actually wanted to do before, but a particular fic conked me right back 6 ft under. Piled the dirt over me and packed it in tight. So here I am again. And not only is it like that, but after binging a whole nearly 60,000 words in a night/morning, I was struck with the inspiration to actually write myself. Or try to, anyway. I have experience in RPing, but not a whole lot in actually... making a story myself. It’s not been going well, but I’ve talked plenty about that already... I’m sure it gets annoying for the whole maybe one person whose seen most of it to witness. And I’m still having fun. I’d mention the fic, but considering it’s NSFW and I’m officially tagging this... I don’t know if they’d want me advertising it as such. But surprise surprise, it’s Floofty related. And don’t get the wrong idea, while it covers explicit subject matter, that’s not entirely the point. Not a bad thing if it were, just that it’s more than that. I just like good character writing over all else, which is something liking this game to begin with heavily reinforced.... 6th: Heeeere’s Gramble, again. I’d been doing some little drawings for character profile stuff in my notebook, but I started to run into some difficulties when I got to him. This here is one of the results of the couple of little draws I did to try and understand. Again, his proportions are so *weird*. He’s just a little guy.... 7th, 8th, 9th, 10th: Here marks the first impulse draw after considering Buddy/Filbo/Beffica poly stuff. As well as the sudden Buddy drawing in general, which came as a big shock to me. These draws are suuuper rough, but I like the concepts. And goodness has this stuff been a whole ‘nother tangent... I did a fair amount of talking about it here. I’d do more, since there were TONS of details I still wanted to mentioned, but... my hands are starting to hurt. So maybe later. I realized that I kinda of messed up their design in my head bc I thought they had more similar teeth to Clumby. Whoops. That’s what I get for not using reference and same with FlooFTY’S TEETH AND THE WATCH NOOOOOOOOOO- .... *Ahem* I reckon the design is subject to change. Gotta make some little adjustment here or there, like maybe different eyes to distinct them from Floofty, but I actually rather... like the look. The hat, tie, and maybe a change to a bag on the side look nice... if totally not canon. But I will have just a little break from canon, as a treat. Otherwise it’s canon or bust. Personally, at least. I don’t really hold others to that standard unless they say they’re trying to follow canon or diverge so badly that a character is unrecognizable.

[crispyjenkins]

Hi Crispy! I was just wondering how do you write characters with multiple pronouns (he/they, she/they)? I’m having trouble trying to vary them throughout my story but it just feels strained on my end. I only have my own experiences to go off of as a fledgling non-binary person and I can’t find any writing resources on the subject. It’s ok if you don’t have an answer I was just wondering!

hmmm that's am excellent question! and like most things, there isn't any one answer. (so of course my answer is heckin long rip)

my personal experience with varied pronouns is, for lack of a better word, varied (ﾟ◡ ﾟღ) when i first started going by he/they (oh lord like six years ago??), I was one or the other for whole days or weeks, and i was going by two names also, so myself and others would associate they/them with one name and he/him with the other. truthfully, i've never written this dynamic

i rarely pass as masculine usually, and i've found in work environments it was so so much easier to have coworkers and customers use he/him because i want to be read as masculine first, if that makes sense? like i wish there was a masculine-they/them if that makes sense? (ღಥ◡ ಥღ)

i have only ever had one person in my life successfully bounce between he and they evenly for me, i honestly don't know how they made it look so effortless to just. use both in a conversation or when they're telling someone about me?

in the context of writing, i still struggle switching, say, obi-wan's pronouns to they/them when i normally write them with he/him? like i'm thinking specifically the agricorps obi, good lord i kept forgetting their pronouns and automatically writing masculine ones. and it was hard to correct in editing, because it. read really normal? it didn't actually stand out to me reading it back, i think largely because obi-wan already has masculine pronouns in canon. WHILE writing it though, blehhh it took me out of the groove a lot because i was constantly having to correct myself and then i'd worry about if i was being clear enough on who's who in a sentence, or with dialogue tags, and i relate to the struggle you're describing A Lot. (i'm writing an nb din right now where they also aren't sure of grogu's pronouns so it feels like a MESS of they/thems everywhere, but then i realised it would be a mess if they were all he/hims, too, i'm just more like. acclimatised to gendered pronouns and was way over thinking it)

now, i also had this problem in hunger 'verse, using Naberrie for obi-wan. it felt clunky and out of place and i was constantly correcting myself.

i guess what i'm getting at is that like 99% of the time, the clunky you feel while writing is because it's something you've never done before, and/or are worried about doing it "right" (or respectfully) , and/or are worried you're not making it clear enough.

i've written varied pronouns like you're describing only once, and i never posted it because i never finished it. i got caught up in worrying about if the readers would understand, if i needed to have an explanation in the notes, if other nb folx were gonna tell me i was doing it wrong

i'm all over the place in this answer omf, but my advice is this: there's no formula for how often you switch between he and they, she and they, etc., because every nb's ratio is different, if that makes sense. if your character doesn't lean any more to one side than the other, i sincerely don't think it matters how or when you change up their pronouns (except maybe not in the same sentence, unless in dialogue; jury's out on switching it up in the same paragraph, i think that's up to you!)

it'll be a little strange for readers, only because they've likely never read that before (lord knows i haven't 🥲) but it's a little strange for those reading a they/them character for the first time, too. it's just a new experience, and by the time the reader really gets into the story, they won't notice it

i don't believe in the "only write what you know" because fuck that, BUT using your own experiences as inspiration or a starting off point or as a learning tool is important too! i can't tell you how important it was for me to start writing obi-wan with hunger 'verse, because he was 22 and i was 22 and I needed that connection to really solidly and understand what i was wanting from him in everything else i wrote for him (as well as everyone else in star wars tbh)

so maybe that's a starting point for you? if you go by, or are wanting to go by varied pronouns, there's nothing stopping you from applying that to the character you're writing. when would YOU switch between them? how frequently? do other characters know or is it only in their internal dialogue/exposition?

your writing feels clunky and forced because you're writing it. when i'm unsure if something is clear enough or too confusing, i usually send it to my kid @theclonewarsbrokeme, and cannot recommend another set of eyes on your work enough. not even a full beta reader or anything, just someone else to look at it while you're writing, largely because, quite often, it reads just fine

[nishaapologist]

Proved You Right (Fallout 4, Sarah Lyons/NB!LW - First Sentinel AU)

a small note: this mentions having a basement in Home Plate, but that’s actually because i have a mod that lets me stick basements down to have a bit more space to breathe. for the sake of I Did It In My Game So It Counts, there’s also a basement in this au too! so yeah. anyway have this gay shit.

(sarah’s pronouns are she/her, rookie’s are they/them)

—

“This probably comes as, like, no surprise, but man... I love this city.”

Finding out there was a balcony, of sorts, on the roof of Sarah’s home in Diamond City — home plate, as they call it, which was a name that’d flown right over Sarah’s head until Rookie had gleefully explained the term — had been a pleasant surprise when Sarah had thrown down the two-thousand or so caps to buy the place, clambering up the rickety old ladder to the roof on her first inspection of the house only to find herself in a little sitting area that overlooked the market. She hadn’t made great use of it right away, more interested in the basement underneath that would later become her new base(ment) of operations in the Commonwealth, but then Rookie had shown up to Diamond City on the coattails of a local merchant, and now they spend near every evening sitting in the shell of an old caravan that’s been welded down to the corrugated sheets of the roof, drinking lukewarm beer as they listen to Myrna holler anti-synth slogans, or quietly singing along to songs on the radio until exhaustion makes all the words collapse into mumbles.

It’s a moment of peace, of relaxation, in a time increasingly fraught with battles and tension, and Sarah actually looks forward to tinkering with weapons or armour on her lap at the end of the day, Rookie beside her and resting on an old sunlounger as they hum along to the radio. It helps to put things into perspective, rather than grinding herself down to a sliver as — many years ago — she would have always done.

“I mean, I don’t like the mayor, or his whole ‘no-ghouls’ bullshit or anything,” they quickly add when Sarah glances up from under her eyelashes, head bowed as she turns the extended magazine of a 10-mil pistol about in her hand. Back in the Citadel, over a decade ago, weapon modding was never really a thing Sarah had needed to do, but it turns out that after years of maintaining Power Armor she has quite the knack for it. It’s just a bit more fiddly than she’s used to, is all. “But I really like everything else. The people, mostly. The market. The stands. All that stuff.”

Sarah snorts under her breath, squinting back down as the sunlight slowly dims on the horizon, a cool evening ushering in a breeze and making the hairs on her arms prickle. Spring is approaching the Commonwealth, the months quick to pass, and soon the most hardy of trees will be flush with life again, Ragstag fawns wobbling on unsteady legs, Yao Guai slowly waking from hibernation. It’s a new year, and 2288 is already shaping up to be an exciting one. “You sure that’s not just ‘cause we’re on a baseball field? Pitch?” Sarah screws up her nose. “Stadium?”

“Baseball park?” Rookie offers, though there’s no surety in their voice. “We called it the baseball diamond back in the Vault, since that was pretty much all we had space for.”

“Baseball diamond, then. You sure it’s not ‘cause of that? Isn’t this, like, your wildest dream, or whatever?”

Rookie kicks one leg out at Sarah, too far away for their foot to even hope of landing anywhere near her, but she jerks backwards to dodge it anyway, laughing at their grimace as they retract their foot. “Oh, please! I have bigger dreams than arguing with Moe fuckin’ Cronin about how ass-backwards he got his baseball rules!”

That first argument with Moe had been quite the spectacle, and one Sarah knows Diamond City won’t forget any time soon; Rookie had been checking out his stock with wide eyes, giving each bat a practice swing to feel the weight and heft as it arced around, and when he’d leant down to tell them how crazy Pre-War baseball had been — one team would beat the other team to death with things called Baseball Bats, and the best bats were called Swatters — Rookie had given him a public dressing-down that even Sarah had sidled away from, lest Rookie’s faithful bat, grasped in increasingly irate hands, accidentally found an arc directly into her skull by mistake. It had ended most excitingly with a lot of swears, intervention from the guards, and Rookie’s solemn declaration that they were never gonna buy bats from ‘such a dipshit’, and even now they and Moe glare daggers at each other from across the market, much to Sarah’s ongoing amusement with the whole thing.

As if remembering the same incident, Rookie takes a swig of beer, glowering off at the floodlights that shine down onto the city. “At least Alex agrees with me about him. This shit’s a dying art, apparently.”

Sarah pauses for a moment, and she can’t help the way her gaze tracks towards the far stands, glancing through one of the glassless windows to where ramshackle abodes sit, suspended, above the common rabble. Alex — or the Sole Survivor as some call her now, after her story about the Vault got published for hundreds of eyes to see, and for many more mouths to gossip about — had been granted a house in the upper stands by Mayor McDonough out of the kindness (or manipulation) of his heart, offering her a safe place to adapt to the new and unforgiving world she’d found herself in. Since they’d met, Sarah had struggled to get much more out of her than single-syllable words and pleas for her to find her son, but it was only when Rookie had shown up that her sturdy, Pre-War walls had finally begun to crumble, just a little.

Really, it’s because they’re a Vaultie, too — different experiments be damned — and it helps that they’re someone who was also thrown into the topsy-turvy world of the wastes with nary an idea for the horrors within. They might not quite be out of time, but they do understand being out of place, and when it turned out that Alex is (or, perhaps was) quite the baseball buff herself, they’d forged a connection that made her, initially, a little warmer. Nowadays, Alex is very nearly sociable.

But she still very much keeps to herself, and it’s enough to have Sarah worry. She sees a lot, maybe too much, of Rookie in her — back when they met in Chevy Chase, still new to this world — to be strictly comfortable leaving her to her own devices, but there’s not much else to be done. It’ll take years before she’ll ever really adapt, Rookie had said, years until she can really grapple with the world she doesn’t know. It’s just tough shit.

“Yeah,” Sarah murmurs absently, drawing herself from her rabbithole of thoughts, and Rookie follows her eyeline carefully, knowing exactly where she’s looking. “Well, hey. I guess you have to think of it this way; you and Alex make up two people who know how to play baseball, right? How many more do you need for a full team?”

Rookie laughs at that, sombre face breaking out into a toothy grin, and they slide even further down the lounger as their hat slips over their eyebrows. “Hah! Find me six more Vaulties, and then we’ll really be talking. I’ll be able to hit the first homerun in two-hundred fuckin’ years.”

“Wait,” Sarah says with a frown, doing the maths. Even to her ears, it doesn’t seem to add up right. “Only eight people? You sure?”

Rookie snorts, and then they reach up to take their hat off with a lazy pluck, eyeing Sarah up seconds before her vision goes dark as it’s tossed, haphazardly, onto her head and over her eyes.

“Baby,” Rookie coos fondly as she splutters, nearly dropping the magazine to the ground whilst she scrambles to whip it off her head. “Bold of you to think you can worm your way out of being our pitcher.”

The hat gets launched back at Rookie’s face, the brim making a dull impact on the bridge of their nose, and their shout of pain and laughter echoes right across the city.

[fishball-and-sweet-potato]

Zero O'Clock - BirdCop Celebration + GIF Challenge (MLQC AU)

I just wanna join. I actually want to post this fic at ARMY day (9th of July), but here it is anyway!

Pairing : Leah Hong (MC) x Gavin Bai

Warning : triggering events (containing insecurity and anxiety)

Disclaimer : Leah is MC in this AU. In this AU, there is no Evol.

Genre : fluff

Words : 1,542

NB : this fic is also inspired from this song

“Leah, you should go home now. You just left the hospital yesterday, your body still needs time to be fully recovered,” Anna slowly shaked my body, waking me up.

Leah corrected her posture, “yeah, I know I should. But I don’t want to become a burden for all of you, and especially that’s because I’m in charge of this company now. I just feel like I’m the one that should be my fellow workers’ strength, and I failed you all, even my father…” unbeknownst to her, her eyes felt hot. Leah wanted to continue but her brain couldn’t process her emotions right now.

“No, you’re not. And believe me, we all have made mistakes when that talk show was supposed to be aired live. But still, we managed to do it well at last thanks to the content and technical errors,” Willow tried to assure her. Three days ago, Leah had a chance to interview Mrs. Peng, the owner of a well-known bak kut teh* shop named Seventh Heaven. The topic was about business’ survival strategies for small and medium enterprises amidst the economic crisis. Suddenly, her stomach felt painful and she couldn’t suppress it despite all her efforts, until she fainted. The first thing she thought when she gained my consciousness was, she was such an unprofessional disgrace for this show.

“I want to see the editing process for a while,” Leah replied, still refusing to do nothing.

“Boss, we can also lend you a shoulder. I’ll send it straight to you when it’s finished. Okay?” Kiki patted her shoulder.

Before Leah nodded in defeat, Minor continued, “Boss, I’m sorry for the shift of topic, but Gavin said to me that he will come to your house around 10 pm.”

She yawned, “why didn’t he tell me directly?”

Minor rolled his eyes, but suddenly he had a flustered look on his face, “eh, sorry, he already contacted you several times, but no answer from you.”

Leah checked my phone, it had no power. “Oh God, why am I so stupid? Gavin is definitely angry with me now,” she said resenting herself. The fact that she had done this earlier consumed all her sanity. She immediately turned on her phone, and her eyes almost popped out from their sockets seeing the amount of missed calls. The fact that this day was July 28th made her more shocked. “Okay, I gotta go now,” she said after her friends kept telling me the editing was almost finished.

Leah went to Seventh Heaven. Amidst the crowd, she could still hear the voice she knew really well greeted her first, “Leah, are you feeling better?”

“Mrs. Peng!” Leah slightly raised her voice and fastened her pace towards the middle-aged woman. “Yeah, I’m healthy now! I’m… I’m sorry…” suddenly the scene flashed her mind, her body felt heavy.

“You don’t need to. Let’s go inside,” Mrs. Peng replied, dragging her into the shop.

“I think the technical errors are made up…” Leah couldn’t help but loathed everything around her.

Mrs. Peng patted her, “we can’t prevent unexpected things from happening. Instead, the only thing we could do is to find ways so it would be meaningful.”

While Leah was digesting her words, Gavin’s smile entered her thought and erased her anxiety, “I want to buy two portions of pork tenderloin soup, one portion of fish soup, and one braised pork belly. All takeaways, please.”

“For who?” Mrs. Peng giggled. “Let me guess, your policeman friend…”

Leah blushed and tried to hide her embarrassment with all her might, “uh, Gavin, tomorrow is his birthday.”

Not long after, a waitress handed her orders. Leah waved goodbye at Mrs. Peng. Her home was quite far from her company and the shop, so she had to take a bus ride. She was listening to her favourite song, not realizing that she dozed off.

You know those days

Those days where you're sad for no reason

And it looks like everyone else except you is busy and fierce

Those days where your body is heavy

My feet won't set off, though it seems like I'm already too late

I'm hateful of the whole world

Yeah, here and there are click-clacking speed bumps

My heart grows crumpled and my words lessen

Why the hell? I ran so hard

Oh why to me

A bell sound gave her consciousness back. Finance Street Halt, Leah could read the sign clearly and hear the sound of the broadcaster telling the passengers to pay when they intended to leave the bus repeatedly. She hurriedly ran to my home, opened her phone. She just realized that she hadn’t replied to Gavin's messages. Without a second thought, she spammed him her apology. Not seeing any signs of his reply, she attempted to sleep because she was really beaten up. The only thing that kept her awake was the clock, reminding her of her faults and it was already 10.30 pm. She continued listening to the song, so she could relieve her stomach pain and irregular, fast-paced heartbeat.

Come home and lie in bed

Dizzy night, looking at the clock

Thinking if it was my fault?

Soon it will be midnight

When her mind was about to drift off, the bell rang. “Coming,” Leah said, running to the door. The first thing she saw after opening the door made her heart want to leap, but getting crumpled instead. Gavin was in his casual clothes, but with a solemn look on his face. “Gavin, you’re late. Come in,” she said, inviting him to enter her home. He only followed her without uttering any single word.

After both of them sat, he started speaking, “I’m sorry for not telling you, I just finished my work. Leah, have you eaten?”

Leah shook her head, “actually, I bought food from Seventh Heaven. Mrs. Peng is really generous despite all my mistakes.”

Seeing her held back her tears, Gavin approached her, then she felt a pair of warm arms encircled her. “You have done your best, Leah.”

“I’m just a nuisance,” she said coldly. “And yeah, the audience wasn’t really impressed because the airing time was rescheduled. That makes me think that I should get lost forever. And I even forget to return your calls...”

A pair of amber eyes pierced through her soul’s window, his hand patted her head gently, “I’m hateful of the world too. But, about the last thing, that makes me dead worried. Have I done something wrong? Because all I got is my own echo.”

Somehow, she finally managed to let out a laugh, “Minor told me that too. No, actually I’m just dumb. I forgot to charge my phone.”

Gavin sighed, a small but sincere smile curved from his mouth. “I’m here to accompany you tonight.”

Thanks to him, Leah felt much better. “Let’s eat now. I’ve been waiting for you so we can start making our tummy happy!” She was beyond glad because he loved the bak kut teh.

After the dinner was finished, she held his hand while guiding him to her bedroom. Gavin always gave her warmth despite his cold exterior. “Listen to this song with me, it really helps me cope with the present situation.”

Gavin was confused when he put one side of my earphones, “what song?” 

God, how Leah wished she could cuddle him. She showed him the English translation in order to make him understand the meaning better. He was a bit sulky that she liked the boy group that sang it a bit too much, but he tried hard to hide it by cuddling her tight.

It won't be something like that

Will something be different?

But this day will be over

When the minute and second hands overlap

The world holds its breath for a little while

Zero o’clock

Her reminder popped up. It was already July 29th, zero o’clock. They kept listening to the song.

(Ooh-ooh) And you're gonna be happy

(Ooh-ooh) And you're gonna be happy

Like that snow that just settled down

Let's breathe, like the first time

(Ooh-ooh) And you're gonna be happy

(Ooh-ooh) And you're gonna be happy

Turn this all around

When everything is new, zero o'clock

Leah paused the song, pulled herself from his cuddle, “happy birthday, Potato. I hope at this new year of your life, you’ll be happier and healthier.”

Gavin cuddled her again, “thank you so much, my Pumpkin. My wish is the same for you. I hope I’ll be the one who makes you get the happiness you deserve.”

She blushed, how could he be so smooth at times. He laughed at my reddened face. “Why are you laughing? Let us pray,” she said to divert her embarrassment.

They were holding hands, silently pouring all their wishes.

Put my hands together to pray

It'll be better, for me

Hoping that tomorrow I'll laugh more, for me

When this song ends

May a new song begin

Hoping that I'll be a little happier, yeah

Gavin caressed her hair after he saw her yawned. “Sleepy?”

“Yeah, finally. But I’m joyful because it’s the tranquility that makes me sleepy, not the usual tiredness,” Leah snuggled closer to him.

“Sweet dreams for us, then,” he closed his eyes, hugging her in their sleep.

*bak kut teh : a pork ribs / meat soup dish with salted vegetables (this is how it looks like)

This is the GIF :))

[sky-scribbles]

In which my Sidestep flails in confusion over Feelings, and the Rat-King is better than any of us. nb!Sidestep x m!Ortega, ~2000 words, soft and dumb. Retribution spoilers. 

‘I was just wondering,’ Herald says. He’s fiddling with his shirt, awkwardness turning his mind fuzzy around the edges. ‘I mean, I know you and Ortega are dating, but –’

‘Wait. We’re what?’

Herald stares, and you stare back at him. Can’t he learn to shield his thoughts, even for a second? His baffled amusement is screaming out at you, and you would prefer that he didn’t do anything embarrassing, like smile. Or laugh.

‘Dating?’ he says at last. ‘I sort of assumed you were. He… cares a lot about you.’

Maybe he does. Not that you know why Ortega wastes his time doing something so stupid. And, yeah, sure, you can tell why someone would think you’re dating. You weren’t sleepwalking when you wandered down the promenade at his side, let him pull you into his arms and kiss you beside the water. Or when you let him buy you coffee afterwards, and then again the next week, and then the week after that. Or when you spent most of your visits to the Rangers in his office.

It’s just the implications of it that’s startling.

You grab your discarded hoodie, because if you don’t have something to do with your hands you might end up flailing them. ‘So, uh… you’d call it dating? What I’ve been doing with Ortega?’

Herald’s urge to smile wins out at last. ‘I mean, going places together doesn’t have to be a dating thing. But it can be.’

Shit, you need a coffee. Fast.

How the hell did you miss this? How did you not realise that you’d crossed a line into being official? Into dating? Kissing him is one thing, but dating has rules and codes. Things you’ve never quite understood but which seem to be very important to people who actually understand how romance works.

(Maybe your obliviousness shouldn’t be a surprise. Most of your experience with romance comes from reading Shakespeare, and those relationships tend to have significantly more stabbing than the real world. Or more conveniently identical twins.)

Hiding your face is an attractive concept right now, so you tug your hoodie over your head. ‘I just never thought about it that way. It’s hard to tell when these… definitions… start applying.’

Herald is now waging a furious war on his temptation to laugh. ‘Maybe you should talk to him?’

‘Definitely not. I wouldn’t even begin to know how.’

Then again, you don’t know how to date someone, either. Which you are apparently doing.

And after everything you’ve done to Ortega, everything you’re yet to do… shouldn’t you at least try to get this one thing right, while it lasts? Do some research, figure things out?

You shove your hands into your pockets, scowling at the ground. Research. Right. Into dating. That’s just bound to go smoothly.

Your first research opportunity comes three days later. Except it’s not really yours, because you’re in your puppet, a drink in your hand and Dr Mortum at your side. She’s pretending to complain about you dragging her away from her work, but for once she’s sitting back with a smile, her lab coat discarded. No tension in her shoulders, no distracted glances towards the workbenches. The sight makes contentment settle over your chest, as if a cat’s curling up to sleep there.

‘Complain all you like,’ you say, ‘but you need the break. It’s not good for you to stay here all the time. Disconnected from everything.’ You’re parroting Ortega, but it’s what Adam would tell her.

‘I recognise the voice of experience there, mon ami. Neither of us are…’ She hesitates, running a finger along the side of her glass. ‘Adept at emerging into the world.’

‘You got me there.’ Your own body’s response would have been a frown, an averted gaze, but you give a rueful little smile instead. Being Adam is a careful, if comfortable act: lines to rehearse, mannerisms to remember. 'Being around people is... so much effort. The rest of the world talks and chatters and goes on dates, and I could do that, but it’s exhausting. Finding the right people. Not driving them away. You know what I mean?’

‘Intimately. Though – really, you find it so hard to find people? If you took a seat in Joes for a few hours, and sat there looking appropriately tall and handsome…’

You snort into your glass. ‘Why tall, specifically? Are you suggesting there’s a height restriction on dating?’

You’re only half-joking. Dating is weird, you don’t know the rules, and if there is a height restriction then your real body most certainly fails it.

‘Relationships are not a theme park ride, mon ami.’

‘They’ve got just as many ups and downs.’

You remember belatedly that Adam does not mutter like this, but Dr Mortum only smiles at you. ‘You have some turbulent experiences in your past?’

You take a slow sip from your glass. Perhaps the gesture will hide Adam’s face, make sure the doctor won’t see any of your feelings, Wren’s feelings, displayed there. Won’t see any memories of Ortega’s arms pulling you from the wreckage and his lips closing around yours. His voice screaming after you as you crash through the window.

‘Something like that,’ you say, and Adam’s voice is not meant to shake like this.

Dr Mortum looks at you for a moment, her gaze even. And then she does something you did not expect: she reaches across the couch and lays a hand on your arm. Just below your shoulder. Gentle. Steadying.

‘Neither of our greatest skills are with people. And yet, here we are. Sharing a drink.’ The smallest of squeezes before she lets go. ‘I am hardly one to talk, but… I think half the difficulty is in the overthinking. Perhaps you’re not quite so bad at this as you think, mon ami.’

She doesn’t know what she’s saying. Adam might not be so bad, but Wren is.

You’re grateful, all the same.

‘What about you? What do you think?’

There’s a pause before you get a response: a brush against your mind that’s eager enough to make you smile.  ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ… :{D…???

‘Yes, him.’ You give the Rat-King’s canister a pat. ‘And I know you’ve only seen him when he was fighting me, so I guess he didn’t make the best impression. But he’s a lot nicer when he’s not being punched.’

ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ… you… <3?

You bite your lip. Trust the Rat-King to get right to the heart of the matter. ‘Maybe I do. I don’t know what it’s supposed to feel like. I just know I feel a lot.’

But not enough to stop you from putting him in hospital. People who date do not do this. People do not do this.

ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ… :{D… <3????

‘I want to believe that he does.’ There’s a lump in your throat, so you tuck the canister into the crook of your arm. Wrap the Rat-King’s simple, uncomplicated affection around your thoughts. ‘But there’s no happy ending here. I’m not…’

You bite back the sentence, because you’re not sure the Rat-King will understand the significance of you not being human. In their minds, the only difference between you and other people is that you can talk to them. You’re more real than the rest of the world.

The thought makes you hug them tighter, because it doesn’t work like that, but oh god, how you wish it did.

‘Herald thinks I should talk to Ortega. Is that what real people do? Talk to the person they’re sporadically kissing and just… ask about how their relationship should go? There’s no universe where I don’t screw up that conversation. He’s going to think I’m an idiot.’

ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ … (ง'̀-'́)ง!!!

The laugh that breaks from you is startled, and genuine. ‘I’m sure that’s not gonna be necessary, but... thanks for the support.’

You tug them even closer, cradling the little minds against your chest. Deep breaths. Remember what Herald said about Ortega caring. Remember what Mortum said about you overthinking. It’s just a conversation. It’ll be awkward and terrifying, but that goes for most conversations you have.

ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ … <3 <3 <3 …

A smile tugs at your lips. When it comes from the Rat-King, you can be sure it’s true.

The Farm always considered you a good investigator. Unmatched at combing minds, gathering information, acting only once you’d put the pieces together. It’s why you were dangerous in their hands. It’s why you’re even more dangerous now, as Myriad. It’s why you feel like an utter mess knocking on the door to Ortega’s office. Being so woefully under-prepared is nauseating.

You really need a coffee.

He calls you in, and here’s another thing you weren’t prepared for: the way he smiles when he sees you. Your gut’s reaction doesn’t help, either.

‘Hey, Wren-bird.’ He’s grinning, and it’s so easy for him, isn’t it? Crack a smile, drop the old nickname as if seven years never happened, try to make you stop frowning. And it works. Every time, it works.

‘Hey.’ You try not to mumble. ‘Got a moment?’

‘For you? Hours of them.’

You roll your eyes and hop up onto his desk, trying to ignore the yawning mess of nostalgia in your stomach. You spent hours perched on his desk like this when you were Sidestep. You think you were sitting here when you told him your name.

Pushing those thoughts to the side, you look him in the face. ‘Are we dating?’

Here’s something you never expected to see: Ricardo Ortega, speechless. But it’s what you’re seeing, and you’d better make the most of it. ‘Because… I don’t know, Herald said we were, and I hadn’t thought of it like that, but yeah, I can see how we might be. And I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I wouldn’t know how to date someone even if I was trying to. I mean, apparently I ended up dating you without meaning to, so... if I do try to date you, I’ll probably somehow manage to end up not doing it, and –’

‘Wren.’

You stop, because your throat hurts. And apparently that’s all the opportunity Ortega needed to slip around the side of the desk, wrap a hand around your head, and kiss you. Softly, his lips curved into a smile against yours, and you want to roll your eyes again but they’re already slipping shut.

‘You can’t do this every time I start making things awkward,’ you tell him, as he draws back.

He nudges your forehead with his. ‘At least it stopped you panicking. Has it occurred to you that you might be overthinking this?’

‘Sure. I overthink everything. Including my overthinking.’

Another kiss, just barely brushing your lips. ‘You’re not supposed to do anything. If you don’t feel comfortable calling this dating, then we don’t call it that. If there are any… dating things you don’t want to do, we don’t do them. There’s no rulebook here. And if there was, I’m pretty sure you’d throw it out.’

You’re ready to protest, to tell him it can’t be that easy, but he speaks again before you can. ‘We’re going at your pace here, okay? The only thing you need to do is to not change a thing.’

One more kiss, to the top of your head this time, tender enough to make a drowsy, unfamiliar calm melt through your insides. It’s not safe, relaxing like this, but... you can give yourself a few moments. Because’s he’s definitely right about the rulebook. And because what you feel right now is something very like what you felt as you hugged the Rat-King: warm affection, without any complications. Simple.

This isn’t simple, and it never will be, not while you have amber brands on your skin and a suit of armour in your closet and a mess of secrets in your head. But you can pretend it’s simple. Just for a little while.

You always were a good actor.

[teddystrap]

Drama CD: [幽幻ロマンチカ・真骨頂] ≁Karasutengu Hifumi・Baku Utashiro≁

Ok I know this is out of order (I skipped over the previous Hatenkou discs, which I will do later), but I reallllly adore the Shinkocchou concept. This came at the end of a HECTIC week, so to myself and any readers out there, I say a well-deserved: お疲（憑か）れ様でした！

In this disc - the first in this subtitle - Crow-Heavenly-Dog Hifumi and Dream-Eating Animal-Thing Utashiro team up to fight crime and save the Universe... of Nanagiri High School. 

Before I say anything else, first look at the hidden msgs (x2) in the tracklist: 

１．壱、都市伝説『すきま』 ２．弐、スイーツに囲<ま>れて ３．参、湧き出た<も>のは ４．四、陰<り>から立ちはだかる ５．伍、穏やかな夜だっ<た> ６．六、戦うなら<い>っしょに ７．七、都市伝説『すきま』看破 ８．キャストトーク

Hifumi: bold⋆ spells 「すきだから」 (’Because I like you...’)

Utashiro: <⋆> spells 「まもりたい」 (’...I want to protect you.’)

...

(ﾟ艸ﾟ(｡艸｡(ﾟ艸ﾟ(｡艸｡(ﾟ艸ﾟ(｡艸｡(ﾟ艸ﾟ(｡艸｡(ﾟ艸ﾟ(｡艸｡(ﾟ艸ﾟ(｡艸｡ ) ｽﾍﾟｼｬﾙｳﾝｳﾝ

We also find out bits about each character's past - like how Hifumi had been cold and uncaring when he first mixed with the human world, and how he developed a taste for sweet foods because that's what people used to give him as offerings. AND how hilariously angry U-kun gets when people try to point out that deep down he's really just a softie/sweetie.

NB. The audio track is a bonus bit at the end of the final cast commentary track where the two of them do a hilarious 'Free Talk' in character.

*

[The First Rumour: Urban Legend ‘Sukima’]

Something's lurking in the cracks and corners of Nanagiri High School. So far five students have disappeared, starting with a girl in 1st year. Everyone is freaking the fuck out, and even the police have got involved, but this being a paranormal case ofc they are not going to find anything.

On the orders of Toilet Flower Dude (abbreviated TFD), Hifumi and Utashiro are investigating the urban legends to prevent them from destabilising the forces of the Supernatural Seven. And they have come to you for help - after all, youkai get their powers from the goodwill of humans. TFD has even coined a team name for the three of you: DARK DESTINY FAN CLUB. And ofc you are the leader, because vagina power.

As part of the investigation, first you all go to... the nearby cafe and eat cake. Because Marie Antoinette said so. Because apparently a couple from your school was attacked when they went on a date there.

Hifumi decides that you have to act like a couple to bait the monster into attacking you. (Except this is more like a 3P scenario and for some reason nobody finds that just a little bit odd...?) The two of them start feeding you and wiping extra cream off your face, and ofc you become all shy and resistant. So then both of them possess your body and start putting their lips on you to 'make you understand how the cake feels'. #mfw = (*>艸<)ｷｬｧｯ. (Not even kidding, I actually made this face when I was listening to this.)

You finally cannot put up with this treatment anymore, and when they stop, you pick up a chair and start hurling it at them. Damn girl u so hot when u maddd. So much for Battle Plan RaiseBloodSugar1. XD

Plan #2: Ya'll patrol the empty classrooms after school to look for clues. Eventually you find a ...fluffy/slimy-looking... monster consuming a 1st-year boy. When the three of you approach, the monster devours him whole and disappears.

You suggest using yourself as bait, with the both of them possessing your body to fight the monster in invisible mode. Sounds all fine and dandy... except their demon powers totally don't even work against this mochi-mochi monster!! After some failed attacks, Utashiro forms a protective shield to fend off the monster and allow Hifumi to fly you off to safety. (Such beautiful teamwork I could cry...)

Later Utashiro catches up to the two of you. It seems that the monster is so 'impenetrable' because it is feeding off the energy of some human somewhere, whose vulnerabilities it is exploiting. At this point you are still reeling from the narrow escape, so your two manservants boyfriends manservants decide to call it a day and escort you home.

Back home, you refuse to sleep, so the two of them dogpile you on your bed (is it just me or does that sound kinda dirty, sports fans? ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)). You request that they both change into their chibi forms and hug them to sleep. Hifumi doesn't mind at all but Utashiro hates it!! XD

Turns out you can't sleep because you are still terrified from the episode earlier. So they change back into their hot-guy forms and possess your body (because your bed is too small XD) and hold your hand and caress your head. After you finally fall asleep, the two of them commence the BL action pillow talk:

Utashiro is feeling down and blaming himself for not noticing your fear sooner. Hifumi is all like ‘I KNEW U WERE A SOFTIE U SEXY TSUNDERE’, but Utashiro tells him that all the other baku perished because they were forgotten by humans, and this is why he can't forgive and embrace humanity the way that Hifumi does.

As Hifumi correctly figures out, Utashiro is/was the Chief of the baku, even though he was not the most powerful nor the eldest. But Hifumi thinks it's enough that Utashiro did his best for his companions, just like *you* always do, you useless piece of sh... person!! I mean person!!. Hifumi trusts you even though you are a human, but Utashiro is unconvinced, since you never risked your life for him (the way you did for Hifumi)...

...Aaaand you wake up to the kinako-mochi monster in your room!!! Hifumi flies both of you out the window, but it's too heavy for him and he and he drops you both. Orz (well U-kun cushions your fall ofc b/c what are manservants for, amirite?). Meanwhile the monster has followed you out here and multiplied, so you all escape to the school grounds.

In the school gym, the monster and its spawns appear again, and Hifumi tries to fight them off, maxing out his energy much to Utashiro's alarm. Hifumi explains to Utashiro that he was born out of people's wishes,... and just when he was about to be forgotten, *you* appeared and gave him a new meaning to life. So he can't help but be fond of humanity and want to do his best for them.

You stop Hifumi from over-exerting himself, and volunteer to be swallowed alive by the monster so that ya'll can fight it from inside its stomach. Hifumi is all like ‘LET'S DO THIS LEADER >:)’, but Utashiro FREAKS THE FUCK OUT X( and offers to come with you, forming a protective shield to protect you. At some point he finally admits that it would be 'troubling' if something happened to you... This is about as much of a love confession as you’re ever gonna get here, so I'm savouring the fuck out of this line indefinitely <3.

Inside the monster's belly, you find... a girl that was eaten, and pull her into the safety of Utashiro's protective shield. The monster grows weak, and Hifumi uses this opportunity to blow it up into smithereens. All its spawns become inactive as well.

The girl turns out to be the aforementioned 1st-year who was the monster's first victim. She appears to be asleep, so Utashiro takes a peek into her dream: she is infatuated with a senpai, but too shy to talk to him, and can only watch him from afar. The pain of her unrequited love bore cracks in her heart, which the kinako mochi monster has exploited and subsisted on.

You ask Utashiro to change the contents of her dream from #badend to #goodend. As he does this, the cracks in her heart start to mend, and the monsters disappear. But ofc, changing her dream doesn't do much irl; she still needs to make her own happy ending.

Thus, peace is restored to Nanagiri High School!! >:D The five missing students are all found safely and soundly asleep in the school gym, and the first girl finally found the courage to speak to her senpai.

Hifumi teases Utashiro for risking his own life to protect you during Battle Plan MonsterBelly1, but Utashiro claims he only 'changed his mind a little bit about humans'.

But then Hifumi readily admits that he got to see both cool and uncool sides of you during this adventure, and it makes him like you more <3. Upon hearing this, Utashiro is all like ‘GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER’ and instructs you to stick with him so that he shall protect you from the Crow-Dog-Whatever that is *even more dangerous than any urban legend ever*! <333333

*

[Thoughts] OH WOW I got so used to the DiaLovers twisted personalities that I figured this was going to be like a Versus disc where they compete and fight with each other over you. But like I said, the teamwork/bromance is so beautiful it brings a tear to my eye :').

First of all, as KENN observes in his part of the Free Talk, this disc is kind of a parallel world where you are not strictly *romantic* with either of them. But at the same time both of them seem ok with some 曖昧さ (e.g. light touches/kisses) here and there. I guess it's less like a FB "it's complicated" situation, and more of youkai having some harmless fun with a human.

[cf. Remember how all the vampires stripped Yui down to her undergarments and bit her in all the embarrassing places, and she STILL thinks: 'They only see me as food T_T.' Yes that's totally non-suggestive, yes yes, carry on.]

Secondly, like Kimura-san notes, the two personalities make a striking contrast, and Utashiro seems *even more* tsundere than usual compared to Hifumi. But because Hifumi has one more disc than Utashiro, I think he's had more opportunities for character growth, so I'm optimistic about U-kun :)

I think between the two of them, Utashiro is the more mature and sensitive one - as shown by their hidden msgs, Hifumi's feelings lean more towards 'I like you'/displays of affection, whereas Utashiro is more about protecting you & supporting you emotionally.

Hifumi has a more impulsive/careless personality; sometimes he misses little details, and he's ready to take risks if you are. In that regard I think they counterbalance each other quite well, Utashiro talks sense and 'anchors' the situation; Hifumi brings the positivity and the momentum.

Using the two roles of the manzai (traditional Japanese standup-comedy) for analogy, U-kun is the 'straight man' who provides the tsukkomi, and Hifumi is the boke or the one with all the gags.

...Also it just occurred to me how most of the time the tsundere role is either like a younger/spoiled brat type, or a kichiku megane (à la Sakamaki Reiji). Utashiro is kind of like a... tsundere-oniisan? XD Not sure if that's a type, but in any case it’s kinda refreshing, plus he's precious and I love him :3

NB1. KENN's chibi voice is THE BEST. X3

NB2. I wonder what trousers (「なっちゃうパンツ」) Kimura-san was wearing in the recording studio on his dates with 'Dummyko-chan' - which is what he calls the dummy-head mic XD. Now, I'm not sure about this, but there is a good chance that he's the one who came up with the worst nickname in the entire universe 'M-neko-chan'...  

[justkimberley]

HSMTMTS Thoughts Episode 8

Episode 1   Episode 2  Episode 3  Episode 4   Episode 5  Episode 6  Episode 7  

(~1300 words)

“And Benjamin Mazarra said run, so I ran,”

Ricky’s first thought is to tell Gina

Aww Big red is so sad about his props being dead

“Lucky Ducky Puppet Pavillion?” Something about hearing this come from EJ makes it funnier (also… should I write about baby Ashlyn and EJ going to the puppet theater as kids??)

Carlos speaking spanish!

“Yes I am that feeling,”

“On your right, heads up! Sorry!” “Don’t apologize this is like… a weird adventure,” Seb and Ashlyn, I love them!

If Carlos hadn’t said anything to EJ, and just let him carry it, EJ literally wouldn’t have looked into it.

“You were gonna spend senior year without me?” I’m starting to feel like Kourtney doesn’t know who she is when she doesn’t have Nini to take care of. Kourtney’s been all about Nini finding herself without boys, but who is Kourtney without Nini? And I don’t mean that her and Nini need to stop being friends, but I’d like to see Kourtney go for something for herself with Nini supporting her instead of the other way around. I don’t know, I just hope we get some growth

“I don’t need to apologize for who I am,” Ok this could be good advice, but the context it’s coming from is not what we need. EJ needs to know that the things he’s done are wrong, and that he should work to improve himself so that he doesn’t keep making those same mistakes, but that doesn’t mean that he can’t love himself.

Along with the “lacks emotional connection to the material” he often puts up this wall and we never really get to see him be vulnerable. Even when he’s emoting, it’s not genuine (as Carlos so aptly points out later)

How did Natalie Bagley get stage manager? She’s never there??

“I know how to hang out,” I love Big Red

“I have baking club tonight,” I love Ashlyn

“You walk into a room,” “Oh..:)”

Cuties!!

The speed Big Red pulls that lever at after Ashlyn walks away is hilarious

“Look about the other night at Ashlyn’s party,” “Oh no, it’s totally fine I get it,” “You do?” “Yeah, I said something nice you acted like a punk, what is there to discuss?”

Ok so here’s the thing, Ricky tends to be bad at communicating his emotions and what he needs, but he actually did communicate them at Ashlyn’s party. Nini said something to try to comfort him and he said “Please don’t do that,” he communicated his boundary and what he needed from her was space. She pushed it, which is why he reacted so harshly. Should he have said what he said? No. But we need to keep in mind that he communicated his headspace, he asked her to leave him alone, and she didn’t.

“For the record your the one who called me your buddy, and I’ve been Iced out for weeks so that’s that on that,” 

So here’s the thing, Ricky called Nini his buddy when he left that voicemail (which… did she even end up getting?) but he did that as more of a cover-up because he was going to say boyfriend

Ricky’s been consistently telling himself and Big Red that him and Nini are just friends now, he’s been trying to convince himself, the problem is it didn’t seem real to his brain because Nini hadn’t even been talking to him other than for rehearsals and need-to-know stuff (I believe, we don’t actually know, but this is my guess)

Nini called him “buddy” in a really condescending sounding voice if I remember correctly and so it’s no wonder that hearing that he was officially a “buddy” along with the voice used would set him off a bit.

Not to mention that he was just coming off of finding out about his mom’s boyfriend so he really wasn’t in the best place mentally to begin with anyway

That shriek when the lights go blue and the mannequins are there, is great

Carlos’ face when EJ is emoting is great

“That was excellent, and a little weird,”

Also Troy doesn’t cry at this part? EJ… buddy, that is not the emotion you’re supposed to be feeling

“Are you sick?” amazing

“Big Red did you do that?” “No.” He just pops up right beside her so unexpectedly, it’s so funny

Thank god her name’s actually Nina, I was seriously questioning her moms’ choice on naming their child Nini.

Also most kids don’t have trouble with A’s it’s like the first sound they make usually (mama, dada)

It’s kind of cute how they gave each other nicknames

“Was it the name or the fact that I microwaved your barbie that year?” You know, as you do.

“And then I couldn’t even say “I love you,” when you wrote me that song,”

I was going to say too soon, but to be fair it’s been about 9 months since that happened and if she had truly moved on, like she’s led Ricky to believe, it wouldn’t have been too soon

Also that was hella awkward

Courtney has a fantastic voice, but this song is really not made to be sung like this.

Ughh microphone feedback, my worst enemy

Ok I know that a lot of people have talked about this already, but like… how old is that popcorn? The last time the theater was used was 4 years ago so…

Yes, it is possible that the kids could have popped some new popcorn but considering how busy they were, I find it highly unlikely. So… gross

“Cause apparently I don’t have emotions,”

The whole, “Is that the last apple?” part is so pitiful… like, if you latch that hard onto something that it stays with you for over ten years afterward? You should talk to a professional about that.

Of course Ashlyn would have lucky crystals

“Mememememememememe,” “Youyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyou,”/ “Ninininininininini,” hilarious.

Ricky is like Nini’s biggest fan he has so much belief in her and her talents.

“Minnie Mouse, your first crush,” “actually she was my second,” *lean in and … BIG RED* I’m a sucker for that kind of interruption

“I heard you singing earlier, you’re not gonna quit makeup crew are you? … I mean the Sharpay makeup, you made me look the way I feel”

I think this was a bit of sharpayness, and by that I mean, I think Seb felt threatened by Kourtney’s singing. It was beautiful singing, and she sang a Sharpay song. One way of keeping people where you want them is to make sure they stay where they are

Also the whole “You made me look the way I feel,” part. So here’s my take on this. I know a lot of people are headcanoning that this means that Seb is trans/nb/genderfluid and that’s great! Continue headcanoning what you want to headcanon. Personally I think that it’s more of a man wanting to present femininely. There’s not a lot of examples of feminine presenting men in youth media so it would still be important representation. It’s also important to remember that gender expression and gender identity are two very different things.

“I don’t want to freak her out more with my lifeless eyes,” “Don’t make me start emoting,” EJ is so funny sometimes

Did she pass out from fear? Or was it the crystals working?

“This is your contractually obligated dream sequence,”

The beginning of “Role of a lifetime” reminds me of the Lightning Thief Musical

Lucas Grabeel, it’s nice to hear him singing something genuine

Miss Jen finally having some actual good singing time.

They’re all so cute doing that group dance at the end of the song

“I’m the teacher,” “Yeahhh?” “I know where we have to go,” “Broadway?” “Back to East High,” “Oh my god how hard did I hit you?”

“Dude,” “Talk about it in the car,”

I would love to see this car scene

Courtney shouldn’t have called the YAC without asking Nini first. That’s not a fun surprise to get.

[handsmotif]

ive been feeling so much love for my very many ocs lately so im gonna write some blurbs about them and the diff stories they are/were involved in under the cut PLEASE feel free to ask questions about any of them i love infodumping abt them

Aquapolypse basically years into the future humans mutated into fish people (and various other creatures but this primarily focuses on the fish people) Zak and Zenna - twinsies! based off betta fish! very pretty, very fashionable, very fighty. strong familial bond. i adore them Solv - based off piranhas! Baby’s First Nonbinary OC, they have a crush on Zenna, and very stereotypically Emo. listens to mcr and cries that they were born in the wrong generation Xavier - swordfish! VERY punk. he has a crush on Solv, who, as we know, has a crush on Zenna. 10th grade me wouldve played this up as a love triangle but i am so much wiser now and resolving it with polyamory

Untitled a the last unicorn-esque story, but with a wood elf! she’s the last of her kind but has no idea. she’s just been vibing in the woods for a while until modern times comes along and builds a housing plan right next to her woods. she gets lonely at night and sings sometimes, causing rumors to spread that the woods are haunted. 2 young people (i picture them to be about 20???) decide to check it out, find her, and immediately think shes adorable and bring her home as a wacky 3rd roommate. Rhathel - the elf in question! shes very strong and very smart and capable, but her lack of knowledge when it comes to modern human culture causes many to think she’s an idiot. NOT the case. she will beat you up V - disaster punk nb lesbian! falls in love with Rhathel almost instantly  Carlos - distinguished gay(tm). V’s best friend and voice of reason. bit of a nerd and a techie. always got the Latest Gadgets. listens to carly rae jepsen and cries Untitled 2 But Superheroes a group of teens hanging out in places they shouldnt be leads to them getting involved in a freak accident that bestows them all with super powers! however, unlike a lot of superhero stories, they dont have any sort of mentor whatsoever to tell them how to be a hero, and well. when you leave these idiots to their own devices they are truly idiots! Lola/Lolita Light - the self proclaimed leader of the team. consumes a lot of superhero media and magical girl anime, thus reasons that she knows exactly what to do in these situations, but usually ends up getting them into worse places than they started. she gained the ability to manipulate light molecules and decided her alter ego should be a magical girl Ness/Frostbite - sarcastic and cold, but is actually the mom friend of the group. she loves her friends deeply but won’t say it. i very clearly picture her with blonde to blue ombre hair. she, as you may have guessed, can control ice and snow Brandon and Brendon - Those Assholes(tm). we all knew them in high school and probably got bullied by them a few times. i do love their character development though where they realize they’re assholes and start making up for it. anyway their powers work in conjunction and i havent *quite* figured out the mechanics of it yet, but they have to be in close proximity to each other in order to do anything. this effectively starts to rid them of their “no homo bro” attitude when they realize they literally have to hug every time they want to power up. i forgot what their alter egos were but i THINK it had something to do with storms and electricity?? i dont remember Dante/Inferno - the antagonist who eventually comes around and joins the team. he was initially part of the friend group but got so fed up with constantly being excluded and bullied by them that he literally formed a whole ass supervillain ego when he realized he had fire powers. the team does realize how shitty they were to him and they BOTH have redemption arcs.

Various scatterings of different ocs that dont necessarily come from any stories but i love them a lot Coronam - a spn demon oc i made in like 10th grade. goes by Corey for short. i still love him so much. he’s definitely an edgelord and i put him through the “would your oc be a tumblr sexyman” quiz and the result was he would be on par with the onceler Blaze - a dnd character i made for a oneshot! they’re a tabaxi warlock and basically if you took meg from hercules’s backstory and mixed it with the song woman by kesha you would understand her.

[slowlyshytheorist]

I wanna tell my story

This is gonna be a long post and I don’t know who will read this and maybe those of you who do will already know most of it, but for the first time i will tell the whole story in one stretch.

My name is Alex. My name has always been Alex, but i didn’t figure that out till about 6 months ago. To tell this right i gotta go back a little further than that though. I have a friend who just finished her bachelor i psychology and every time I have told her about my family and how i was treated growing up she’d say that it’s a wonder i don’t have a mental illness. The first times I laughed with her at it, but eventually there was this little voice that kept saying “but maybe i do”. A little over a year ago i started noticing it. The symptoms. I was struggling with making it through my every day life. Struggling to get out of bed, to cook, to eat, it was all just too much. But due to the bagage from my childhood, i just kept it to myself and pretended that nothing was wrong. In the middle of this dark period where i could barely survive i did something. I was drinking one night and ended up sleeping with some random dude at my dorm. I barely remember, all i know is that the next day i felt horrible. I thought back to a question that my friend once asked me, about my sexuality, and i found myself googling “How to know if you are asexual”. It took me about a day to build up the courage to text my friend and tell her what had happened. I felt wrong for days after. Not because I’m ace, but because I’m sex negative and I had violated my own boundaries.  A few months passed and i accepted it, I even learned to be proud of my sexuality. It was harder to admit that i’m aromantic as well, because it felt like that was the same as giving up on the notion that i would ever have a SO. I do want that some day, and i know now that i can find that person, my person, as i like to refer to them. I came out to my family and they took it... not bad, but not what i had expected either. My sister’s reaction was the worst. At first she laughed as if it was ridiculous. I tried to explain that i was serious but she kept laughing. It wasn’t until her husband, who was there too, told her that it was real, that she stopped laughing and started listening to me. I thought that was the end of it, but one day she made a homophobic comment and i called her out on it. Her “defense” was that anyone who is not straight is a biological mistake. That there is nothing wrong with it, but that it doesn’t change the fact that it’s a mistake, a flaw in our DNA. She still believes this. The rest of my family just didn’t care. not in a “we don’t care what your sexuality is, we love you anyway” way, more in a “we don’t care about what happens in your life” way. Still it was better that my sister, i suppose.  Through all this, my depression was still undiagnosed, but raging and incapacitating me on a daily basis. Luckily i had found a support system. I found a server of likeminded people. They were becoming my family, since my “real” family had let me down. It wasn’t long till the next big life altering revelation hit me. I’m not cis. And the feeling i have had my entire life relating to my name, has a name. It’s called dysphoria and it explains so much. My server family helped me find my real name, Alex. Well technically Alexandria, but most days are Alex days. It wasn’t long after this that i hit rock bottom, i snapped at the people i care about and acted like a huge jerk because i was miserable. I decided to get help. I got diagnosed with depression and I started treatment almost immediately.  A few months passed where i went by Alex online, but not irl. I felt more and more dysphoric about being deadnamed, so i decided to tell my family that i was changing my name. I kept my gender to myself because i doubt that would be received better than my sexuality was. I got one response, my mom saying that it would be hard. That is all, the rest ignored me. A few more weeks and i got confirmation, my name had officially been changed and i had a full day of euphoria. Which is saying a lot considering i still had a depression. A couple of days later i went to visit my family a weekend for my little brother’s birthday. I made it through a day and a half of being deadnamed and being ignored when i corrected them. My sister would send me annoyed looks though, but that was the most reaction i got until she snapped. She told me straight up that she would never be calling me Alex and that she was furious with me for doing this without consulting with them first. She told me that I was being rude and inconsiderate and forcing this upon them. I was expecting a confrontation, but not one this bad. Even so, I had my reaction ready. I got up and calmly said “Fine, then i will be leaving now” My mom tried to stop me, but she took my sisters side and after some yelling and some tears i ended up storming out of there. i spent the 15 minute walk to the busstop sobbing uncontrollably. I sent a text to my brother, apologising for leaving before his birthday party, but promising to make it up, then i called my dad’s girlfriend, who does accept my name change, and told her what happened. Then i called my friend and told her too, i was crying most of the way to the train station, but by the time i got home (3 hours later) i was out of tears.  I since talked to my mom about it all. She will try to accommodate my name change, but she still hasn’t admitted that she was in the wrong. I fear that our relationship won’t ever be the same. My sister refuses to acknowledge my existence and hasn’t said a word to me in 4 months.  That brings us to the present. My medication is working and i am getting through my depression much better now. I am surrounding myself with people who respect me enough to actually call me my name and letting the rest be. I am learning to stand up for myself. The next step for me is something i have been planning since before my name was officially changed. I am gonna have a funeral for my deadname, i’m gonna bury all my old id cards and some other stuff i have with that name on it. It started as a goof, but I don’t have any more reason to postpone it and suddenly I am anxious about it. I realise that it has come to mean so much more to me and even thinking about it makes me tear up. I can’t put words on my feelings, but my friend did quite a good job guessing: “I am thinking it is because it is all of it at once. It is a farewell to, but also a reminder that, you have been living as something other than yourself for more than 20 years, and the box you have been put in always. It is a manifestation of your entire process where you have figured out who you are. It is a symbol of your entire battle to be allowed to be you and to get others to respect the human you actually are. It is the relief over having figured out why your deadname has always felt weird. It is the joy of actually being named something that feels right and feels like you. It is the symbol of so many fundamental things by you that is finally being allowed to live in the world, and that is a big package of emotions in one action”

So this is my story. I have been through some things. I know many have it worse, but that doesn’t mean my experience wasn’t bad. It doesn’t mean i don’t get to tell my story. I am going to start planning the funeral and i will mark that day in my calendar, like i marked the day i officially became Alex. I will use these two dates as reminders of what i went through. Every year i plan to take a moment and think about where i have been, but more importantly, where i wanna go. I don’t think i will ever come out as nb to my family, but i won’t hide it either. those who see it, may see it, i’m not gonna hide who I am anymore. I am not going back to suppressing myself for anyone. I am going to learn to just be me. 

[scbincx]

𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭  𝐬𝐚𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐚.

[ ESTER EXPOSITO, 22, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ] welcome to the du pont institute for the young & gifted, [ SABINA MARQUEZ ]. you have been accepted as a [ REGULAR ] student from [ SPAIN ], going into your [ SENIOR YEAR ] and majoring in [ INT'L BUSINESS MANAGEMENT ]. your peers at the institute say that you are [ ASTUTE & SELF-ASSURED ], but being [ VEXING & CONNIVING ] may be the reason why the police are asking about you. did you think they wouldn’t find out that you were michael’s [ GIRLFRIEND ]? [ ADMIN J, 23, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER, EST ]

hi friends! jocey here with my first bby, sabina. i’m just gonna get this out of the way right now - apologizing in advance for all that is sabina because she’s truly just the worst™. lol anyways, gimme a like or hmu on discord if you’d like to plot with my little demon child!

name : sabina isabella maria marquez nickname : friends call her sab age : twenty-two sexuality : bisexual hometown : madrid, spain major : int’l business management, minor in entrepreneurship extracurriculars : student council president, business leaders of tmrw, du pont editor, honour society, model UN (spain)

━  the marquez family is known to have a bit of a controversial reputation, mostly surrounding how they made their fortune. what started out as a small delivery company in the canary islands decades ago has now expanded to a global empire of sorts. officially, marquez enterprises is a shipping company that controls the major ports in spain, and owns several businesses throughout europe and latin america.

━  but off the books? well, let’s just say there may be rumours that they’re involved in some shady business and have quite a few shady interesting contacts from all around the world, from politicians to some less than savoury people. regardless, it’s common knowledge that the marquezes are filthy dirty rich, enjoy living extravagantly and lavishly, and are practically seen as spanish royalty in the social scene.

━  as the eldest born to the head of the marquez empire, sabina was always groomed to take over marquez enterprises one day. she has a younger brother, though he shows no interest (or any capabilities, for that matter) in even being a part of it. then there are all of her cousins who want the seat - her seat - at the head of the table for themselves, like her cousin cristiano. well, over her dead body. and even from the grave, she would never let that happen because this was her birthright. while most kids dreamt of flying to the moon or being a princess, sabina always knew she was going to rule the world marquez empire one day.

━  sabina is her parents’ daughter in every way possible. they taught her everything legal and illegal that she needed to know in order to be successful in life. but some things even they couldn’t quite explain themselves. like when three-year-old sabina stole all the crayons in daycare to force other kids to buy them back with their snacks. from a young age, she quickly learned that tricking people into giving her what she wanted out of their own dumb free will was so much more satisfying than stealing it from under their noses. she may be named after a saint, but anyone will tell you she is anything but.

━  a hustler with an alpha bitch mentality, she’s always outsmarting people and outsmarting the system to get things to work in her favour. and when that didn’t work, no one could ever say no to a big fat wad of cash. because sabina marquez never loses. she doesn’t just play the game, she owns it, makes the rules and wins. every. damn. time. sabina strongly believes that playing by the rules was for suckers and if you weren’t the best, then you were nothing at all. and sometimes being the best required playing dirty. if she has to ruin someone else’s life to get her way, then she will gladly pour a jug of gasoline, light a match and enjoy watching it go up in flames. hell, sometimes she’ll do that just for the fun of it anyways. and if that’s what she does for her own enjoyment, then you do not wanna know what she does when she’s pissed off.

━  with that mentality, it’s no surprise that sabina easily became the top student of her program and student council president. though she may have lied and cheated her way to the top on several occasions, there’s no denying that she’s fucking brilliant. yes, she could have done it the right way, but where’s the fun in that? if anything, pulling off all the lying, cheating and scheming proved just how smart she really was. and maybe that’s why michael fell for her. 

━  sabina always thought she was too good for michael. in fact, too good for almost anyone at this school. the whole golden boy, mr. popular act was boring and cliche, and she saw right through it. and yet somehow, almost as if it’d happened overnight, michael had won her over and they were quickly known as du pont’s ‘it’ couple. everyone envied them and wanted to be them. they couldn’t be a more perfect couple and she was the perfect girlfriend - sweet, adoring, supportive. in fact, so perfect that no one ever knew that deep down, sabina had never hated anyone more in her life than michael fucking valmont. and she couldn’t be happier now that he’s dead.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

BEST FRIEND  ━  someone who can put up with sabina’s awfulness, or maybe they’re just as awful as she is. this is probably one of the few people she’s actually relatively nice to (at least, by her standards) and will always have their back. possibly even one of the few people she’ll ever let her guard down for. preferably m/nb tbh bcuz she tends to be a bigger bitch to girls cuz they’re obvs more threatening than dumb boys are lol.  taken by simon bexley, cade harrington, sofia gonzalez-cortes MORAL CONSCIENCE  ━  does sabina even have a moral compass? your guess is as good as mine. this is someone she is more likely to listen to and could try to sway her from doing, y’know, ~*just sabine things*~. kind of the angel on her shoulder? often tries to get her to be nicer and overall be a decent human being.  taken by grant winter-grandview EXES  ━  either she dumped him/her, or she was dumped (in which case, rip my friend). maybe there are lingering feelings. who knows?? could be interesting if they’re very different from sabina and that’s why it didn’t work out despite the chemistry or whatever. RIVALS/ENEMIES  ━  ho’boy. homegirl can piss off a lot of people just for shits and giggles, nor does she care to be likeable and personable, so i’m sure she’s got a hella long list of enemies/people she rubs the wrong way. also people she’s sabotaged and manipulated to get her way? plz.  taken by adelaide montserrat, alice coltell, saylor winter-grandview, daisy kennedy CHILDHOOD FRIEND  ━  self-explan. they’ve known each other since they were kids and their parents are likely friends.  taken by madelyn vasquez UNWANTED CHILD  ━  sabina somehow ended up being this person’s very reluctant mom friend. she hates it, she does not want to deal with them, and yet she’ll still go pick up their drunk ass at 4am. she’s all about tough love, so while she may be super harsh and hard on them, she does it out of love and because she cares. not that she’d ever admit caring.  taken by nicollo fernez, james thompson UNLIKELY/ACCIDENTAL FRIENDS  ━  they shouldn’t get along, but somehow, they just do and their friendship works. not typically someone sabina would see herself being friends with, but somehow an accidental friendship of sorts developed.  taken by aurora van der berg, crimson cooper SECRET FLING  ━  the person sabina cheated on michael with. it’s definitely more than a one-time hook-up, but not quite a relationship yet either. she cares about them a lot more than she’d ever care to admit out loud, but it shows through her actions.  taken by william acher CAT & MOUSE  ━  the more sabina can’t have something, the more she’s driven to go after it, even if it’s just to prove a point. and that point is that she’s always right and she always wins. so she’ll flirt, sweet talk and pull out all the stops just to get them to admit that they’re wrong about her. could also work the other way - the more they want her to cave, the more she’ll push and fight it.  taken by gabriel johnson

okay, that’s all i can think of off the top of my head. some plots i’m open for multiple characters to fill, unless it has been crossed out. and ofc, i’m always open to new ideas too!

[charlicpace]

GIF PACK POLL RESULTS !

so, as you’ve probably seen over the last few days if you follow me, i posted a survey a few days ago about gif packs and people’s relationships with reblogging them. i mostly posted it out of curiosity, as i’d noticed a few patterns over the years and wanted to see what some actual, physical data would look like, and the lovely @stevienick pointed out that the results would be useful for fellow gif makers, so here we are ! i wasn’t sure if anybody would respond, so thank you to everybody who did & a very big thank you to everybody who boosted the post ! i’m very grateful ♡

quick note:

it might be easier to view the results if you add /mobile to the end of the url, as i know a contained theme can squish things sometimes ! i’m gonna talk about the results of each question a little, but of course you are more than free to ignore my ramblings and just observe for yourself, and you can ctrl +f to the questions if you’re looking for results for a specific one !

the results: 

DO YOU REBLOG GIF PACKS?

i looked at how the results were doing whenever i had a free moment when the survey was up, and i think i ended up checking on it about eight or so times in that time, and in the first twelve hours or so, ‘i will like but not reblog’ had no votes, so it’s very interesting to me that as time went on and more people responded, this changed ! while the other questions are helped by the poll only being taken by people that do interact with gif packs in terms of notes, i do wish maybe a couple of people who won’t like, reblog, etc no matter what, had responded, but i’m glad they didn’t as that means that people ( or at least those people who filled out the survey ) are following gif makers’ rules, and that’s fantastic. 

WHY WOULD YOU REBLOG A GIF PACK?

i feel like i want to start everything with ‘this was really interesting, because...’ but it all was ! i found everything really interesting, especially watching the majorities change over time, but something specifically that i found myself thinking Hmm,,, Inch Resting™ while observing, was the most popular responses shifting and changing over time. admittedly, for some reason, i wasn’t expecting so many people to admit to reblogging a gif pack of a person they’ve never seen before just because they’re attractive, and i don’t know why, as there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that ! it just surprised me ! but, unsurprisingly, the results show that the vast majority of people are more likely to reblog a gif pack of a fc they like, and that makes nothing but sense to me. i do love, though, that the vast majority of people just want to show appreciation for the work put into gif packs. 

the ‘other’ responses:

the ‘i wouldn’t’ confused me for half a second, but i’m assuming it came from one of the people who said they like the gif packs but don’t reblog them -- in hindsight, i definitely should’ve included an ‘n/a’ option ! to find later is a very valid answer, and i think i should’ve included that in ‘because i want to use the gifs’ -- i think those responses are similar enough to be included in the same umbrella, so i’d just image the yellow bar being a little bit longer, and the percentages going up a smidgen, if you’re wanting to use this data to your advantage. to spread awareness of more fc’s is definitely an option i should’ve included in hindsight ! lots of gif makers make wonderful gifs of people the rpc may not know all that much about, so signal boosting them and letting the world know they have resources is a great reason to reblog a pack, and works nicely as a ‘hey there’s no excuse for not having diversity in your rp, look at this cute person with nice gifs’ and i definitely hadn’t thought of that when typing up the questions !

WHERE DO YOU FIND THE GIF PACKS YOU REBLOG?

i should’ve worded this better, by acknowledging that ‘likes’ also count here, but it seems as though those who said they like but don’t reblog got the gist of what i was going for, and answered that way for me anyway. basically, what i meant by this one was ‘if you’re interacting with a gif pack, where did you find it?’ 

anyway, unsurprisingly, the vast majority of people find gif packs either on their dash, or in the tags, and i feel like a lot of us take this into consideration when posting our packs. more people are going to see the post if it’s posted on a friday or saturday evening, than 11am on a tuesday, even with timzeones taken into consideration, and we use that knowledge to our advantage already.  

the ‘other’ responses:

makes sense, but it does make me wonder where the original posts were found in the first place !

the end result was nothing surprising, i don’t think. i think the limit of having five functioning tags is a little limiting when trying to get packs out there. i usually tag ‘#fc name gif hunt #fc name gif pack #gif pack #rph’ and then a wildcard. sometimes it’s the fc’s name, and i try and make an educated-guess-type-of-judgement on whether that one’s a good idea. sometimes it’s another one of the rpc tags. this question is one of the ones that i was really glad i included an ‘other’ option, as i think they’re very useful for the most part. 

the ‘other’ responses:

tags like gmcentral and gifpackshq are great because they can be used by anybody, and after seeing the results, i’m wondering if i personally might swap out some of my usual tags in favour of them ! tags such as tasksweekly and gifpacknetwork are wonderful, and we know to use them when applicable. i do love that all four of those tags are being used even by the people who aren’t running those blogs associated with them, in favour of finding more resources. i didn’t know that people still actively searched for faces and gif packs in tags like ‘underused fc’ -- and any tags like that -- so that one was super interesting, and definitely something i’m going to think about ! and while i like that people are using icons ( i love me a good rp icon, don’t get me wrong ) this poll is specifically about gif packs, so do with that data what you will. 

WHAT INFORMATION TO FIND YOU FIND HELPFUL WHEN INCLUDED IN THE POST?

i know i said i’d practically be saying this for every one, but this was really interesting. it’s also another time when i think that hindsight is wonderful, because i think now i should’ve included a question asking how often someone will click the link to view the gifs, and if it’s only if they plan on using them, or they might click the link to see what the others look like beyond the preview before reblogging, but close the page after a few have loaded and they can see that everything looks fine, etc. the reason i say this now, is because i know that some people include this information on the page the gifs are stored on, but not in the post, and i’m wondering if it makes a difference. however, the question did ask what information is helpful in the post, so i’m going to keep that in mind when looking at the results. i think this is one of the questions hat i found most helpful to me personally, as i don’t include the the three most popular results in the post. the second and third most popular, i include on the gif page, but i don’t put any of the top three in the post, and i should think about changing that. 

the ‘other’ responses:

it was when the ‘others’ started rolling in that i realised that i should’ve worded the question better. it should’ve been ‘what extra information do you find helpful...’ and i’m glad some folks pointed it out, as i deem trigger/content warnings to be a necessity. to me, the basic information would be name of the fc, how any gifs are in the pack, the source material, and then any content warnings, and anything else is just extra information, but i didn’t say that, so i’m very glad people mentioned trigger warnings and the number of gifs in a pack - thank you ! 

WHAT’S YOUR PREFERRED METHOD OF ACCESSING THE GIFS IN A PACK?

for quite a while, a download link had absolutely no votes -- in the end, it only got four, but it’s nice to know that people do still use them ! other than that, i don’t think this one was at all surprising, but still helpful to see it written down.

PLEASE SELECT ALL STATEMENTS YOU AGREE WITH... 

this one was fascinating. nearly half of people only reblog gif packs of fcs they like, lots of people care more about bumping faces of colour and nb and/or trans fcs than plus sizes or disabled ones, lots more people admitted to being more inclined to reblog a gif pack if they find the fc attractive than i thought would, and the number of people saying that they’re not more likely to reblog younger fcs than older was a lot less than i thought --- i’m sure i’m not the only one who’s noticed that gif packs of younger faces tend to get more notes than those of older, even if you take out any other variables that could skew that number. all very interesting results, and results i think we’ll all find useful. it’s also nice to see that people tend to care more about accessibility than about aesthetics, with more people having an ‘upper size limit’ for gifs than having a lower one, and it’s nice that 93% of people are fine with reblogging gifs of people they’ve never heard of and opening themselves up to new faces !

DO YOU MAKE GIF PACKS?

so i added this one on the end to see if the results would differ based on whether the person responding makes gifs ( in my head, i was wondering if gif makers are more likely to seek out other people’s gifs to reblog to support other gif makers, and things like that ! ) so it’s very interesting and helpful to know that, while not equal, there’s a good chunk on both ends of the spectrum, and some folks in the middle who make gifs but not packs, or edit gifs into gif icons. 

end of results ! if anybody wants to talk about anything to do with the above info, or has any questions, i’m more than happy to chat ! i think i’m going to use some of this information in the future, and hopefully it’s helpful to fellow gif makers out there ! i don’t want to be too ‘in conclusion...’ about all of this, but i do just want to say that it’s very interesting to see written down, with actual evidence, that there are a lot of factors into why someone may or may not reblog a gif pack, and why some packs do better than others ( obviously, a gif pack posted by someone with 1000 followers will do better than someone with 100, even if it’s of the same quality and posted at the same time; more people are going to see it. but i mean more stripping it back to the things we can control like tags used and the layout of the post etc ) and i think if i were to do this again, there are things i’d add ( maybe preference for number of gifs previewed on the post, size/dimensions preference, and things like that ? ) and things i’d clarify, but in general i’m really pleased with how insightful this has been, and if i say interesting one more time i think i may combust, but it legitimately has all been very interesting. again, thank you very much to everyone who responded, and i hope others find this helpful or at least interesting !

[flamewyrmz]

a late night rant from twitter im putting in one place, because its a trainwreck of several threads there. mostly copy/paste and still not proofread, but a collection of thoughts on gender, sexuality, personal identity, and love and support within the lgbtq community. i do really lay myself bare here so id like to ask that if you disagree or have criticism you do so respectfully and with that in mind, thank you <3 and if this means something to you itd mean the world to me if you shared it

dunno if ive said this here before but like. if you think you might be bi/pan but youre on the fence cos maybe youve never had a crush on a nonfictional guy or get more crushes on guys than on girls and you find yourself tied up in knots like "well im gay but im also attracted to nonbinary people unless theyre mostly woman-aligned but i dont wanna say im bi/pan because then people will think i like girls and like i like them theoretically but--" let go. just say fuck it! im bi/pan! 

try it out and if it doesnt feel right it doesnt feel right and thats fine and in the end no matter what youll have learned a little about yourself. this is actually my advice on any gender/sexuality dilemmas you might be having. go wild. try it out. see how it feels. dont feel like you have to confine yourself to something just because youve stuck with it for some amount of time. 

if youre questioning dive right into the deep end! no matter how it goes youll be a better swimmer in the end. its all not quite rigid and a little fluid anyways (for some more than others obv) so if youre unsure, man... go for it. its ok to backpedal

--

this is important advice to me because ive struggled with it multiple times in the past and this has only recently clicked and i really wish it had sooner. first it was with being... not straight in general. like i was actively dating someone of the same gender and i never considered that that meant, uh, im not straight. always "do you like boys or girl?" "uhhhhhhhhh. uh. UH" 

then with being in the range of aro/ace spect. then with being nonbinary! then with being nb but primarily male. and then goddammit im just a boy. accepting that God I Love Men And Only Men (and with it that i *wasnt* aro or ace in ANY capacity) and then, very recently (like up until a couple months ago. like im p sure this year. not 2017), going back on that and admitting i was bi. it is so so freeing to just say "fuck it" and test those waters!

hell, you find something you resonate with but looks a little silly? go for it! use those bun/buns/bunself pronouns. go with stargender! ace-flux demibiromantic? hell yeah rock that shit! it can always change and you can always decide its not right and go back! h4y dudes

--

all of that especially goes for teens who dont know what the fuck theyre doing. im only 20 yea and barely 20 at that but man i wish id heard this sooner

and please dont take that as me saying "well if youre a lesbian sexuality is fluid and maybe youre actually bi"! hell no. if youre a lesbian and you KNOW youre and lesbian and couldnt ever be anything else then rock on you funky little lesbian! but if you id as a lesbian but are teetering on something like "well im attracted to some fictional and theoretical men but not any real ones and maybe its just compulsory heterosexuality but im not sure and--" dont be afraid to try a different label. its all what feels right to you and theres absolutely no harm

--

people bash on like. """mogai genders""" and nounself pronouns and the split attraction model and all that and like. yeah! those things can hurt people! personally i struggled with the split attraction bit combined with how broadly people define the ace spectrum. it can be used to hurt. and it is used to hurt. sometimes its deliberate, sometimes its not. but the hurt is there. but its not inherently good or bad. 

and yeah, some of it sounds silly. hell, it sounds silly to me sometimes! but to some people hearing that label makes everything click into place, even if just for a little bit, and i take that very seriously. it is one of the best feelings in the world and i want as many lgbtq people (of any age) to experience it. 

for some people it feels right to zoom waaaaaaay in and section it into lots of little bits and for others its "fuck it! i dont know shit! im just queer!" and those are both equally valid (that words been thru 12 garbage disposals but i cant think of a better one) maybe you go back n forth and thats fine too! as long as youre open to it changing or being wrong it cant hurt and, like i said, its one of the best possible feelings to have it click like that

--

as an aside: being bi can *totally* mean "im attracted to men and nonbinary people are long are they arent primarily woman-aligned" or it can mean "im attracted to everyone fuck it" personally? i use bi over pan because i feel like it better encapsulates that i *do* have preferences (i say this all the time but God I Love Men) but ultimately gender doesnt really matter to me cos everyones cute and hot and generally attractive and im not leaving anyone out because im just a little more inclined to kissing boys. but thats me!

--

as Another aside: i do still to some degree identify with uhh this is gonna sound contradictory but agender boy? or more like boy agender? boygender with left none? i just dont personally feel like its worth taking the time to explain over n over. but it used to be, for me, n i dont regret that a single bit! i wouldnt regret that even if i *didnt* still feel that way in any capacity. honestly? 

i dont regret any of the ways ive identified in the past even though feeling stuck and cornered into some got a little harmful to me (and if youve gone through somethin similar and DO regret it and wish youd never heard whatever term you used thats good too. im very strongly advocating for "use whatever labels you want and if it dont fit it dont fit" here but if they did hurt you and youre still hurting about it i understand 100% just dont use it to pull others down. if it concerns you say your piece and let them decide)

--

this is personally a little hard to admit so bear with me here 

honestly? ANY sort of strong identity didnt start developing in me until i was.... 14 or so? and very slowly at that. like gender evened out around 18 and sexuality just a few months ago LMAO. but up until i was a teenager i didnt really feel much of anything re: gender or attraction (and the attraction thing is pretty normal for kids and even teens tbqh!) 

and i just.... didnt really think about it! i had This Name and apparently was a girl and i didnt really get what it was like to BE a girl but thats what people said and i didnt know there were other options so i went with it! the name didnt bother me either (except for when people made jokes about a Certain Historical Figure with the same one. just thinking about that i get tired) 

and when it came time to actually grapple with the whole concept of being *into* people i just kinda... slunk away! no joke until like 10th grade if someone started a rumor that i was dating x or y had a crush on me i would start to avoid them entirely. lost a friend in 4th grade that way but then in hs hed turned into a TOTAL DICK so no loss there. i think part of that was also people making the assumption that i was straight though? big shrug! 

i didnt even realize attraction was a thing i had until i got asked out and just kind of "oh wow??? that sounds so nice??? i feel the same??? yes??" and thats WHY i went thru varying aro/ace labels. cos it unfolded slowly (which again is totally normal if youre a teenager, so dont worry about it if youre going thru that. roll with the punches. and if youre a teen and youve got it figured out? thats totally normal too!) 

and the gender thing was similar once i learned that it was an actual possibility (especially being nb, and ESPECIALLY especially being agender) i slowly just... poked at it until i figured something out (fun fact: what set me off to finally go "fuck it im not a girl at all" was being stuck in an awful hair salon chair while my mom got a haircut that took FOREVERRRRRRRRR and i was having godawful period cramps. like i knew not being a girl wouldnt DO anything about them but i made that decision then n there n didnt look back!) 

and then i kept pokin at it and watching it like the seed id planted finally started to sprout and i realized i didnt actually know what kind of seed it WAS. i guess ive always been very nebulous in those aspects and its just now forming into something solid. like i said, its a little hard to admit and i... dont think ive actually talked about this in this depth before to, like, anyone? 

because the "oh ive always known" narrative is the only one you ever see in popular media and sometimes even from the community itself! and theres nothing wrong with having always known! but theres also nothing wrong with being like me! but i still feel a little anxious talking about it like it somehow means im a sham. 

hell, id even go so far as to say i WAS a girl as a kid! i WAS varying shades of agender and nonbinary and ???? as a teen, and i AM, like, 95% a guy right now! maybe in a few years ill be something else. none of those things contradict each other. things like that can change! its not set in stone (but like i said: for some people it is! or, like, set in slime that you left out for 5 years so now its pretty much a rock but if you really try it still squishes into something else?? none of these things invalidate the others! were all unique). 

i wouldnt say that at any point ive been cis or straight, cos even when i just went with being a girl and stuff it was always a little ??? but, yknow. even if i HAD been those things at some point it wouldnt matter to me? things just are the way they are and were the way they were

--

im making myself really vulnerable here and my thought process is a mess and i ramble and repeat myself and my memory and attention span is like 2 seconds and i dont proofread but. its important i think. i dont have a lot of followers and fewer still thatre active but... that really doesnt matter. 

maybe someone will retweet at least one of these messy, messy threads. maybe link it to a friend. maybe screenshot it and post it on tumblr [note: LMAO YEAH AND ITS YOU DUMBASS], or to keep for themself. if any of my words help anyone out even a little then it matters and honestly? then its the most important thing in the whole danged world. if even one person sees any of the things ive said tonight and it means *anything* to them, even if just "oh, im not alone in this" then ive succeeded here. 

i dont want any of us to ever feel trapped or alone because shit! lifes too fuckin short for that! its goddamn hard being anything but cisgender and straight! sometimes it sucks! like really sucks! there have been so many times ive broken down completely over being trans and felt like, for myself, its the most awful thing in the world. its why prides so important. its why community is so important. 

because even when the pressure of the world brings you down so low you think youll never escape theres something or someone there to take your hand and pull you back up, put you on your feet, and say "i know its hard. and itll get hard again. but i believe in you, and youre strong enough for this, and im here with you through every step". that goes for anyone but especially goes for us. and im not just talking about lgbtq youth here. all of us. which is *why* im laying myself completely bare here. 

most of this stuff? ive either never talked about or only vaguely mentioned. but im putting it out there. because there was a point where i needed it but didnt have it, and even if its just one person, i want to give someone this advice so at least they dont have to deal with the same stuff i did. and if youre reading this? i love you. im here for you. im my dms are always open and if for some reason they arent its almost definitely an accident and if you say something ill reopen them. 

and if youre someone who hates me? maybe even mutually? if it came down to it id let you come to me at your lowest moment, no questions asked, no judgement held, and at the end of it still be the same kind of enemies we were before and never speak again. there are some exceptions of course but honestly ill forgive a lot for someone who needs that kind of support. and if youre one of the people this applies to, i know youll probably never take me up on it. i dont expect you to. i dont expect you to even for a second be comfortable with that idea. thats fine. but if for some reason you ever need it, its there. 

i can count on one hand the ex friends that i wouldnt give that to and thats ONLY because theyve legitimately hurt me and left lasting damage (and for some of them? its mutual. and im sorry for that, regardless of how i feel about your treatment of me im truly sorry for my actions. that probably sounds fake and anyway i digress) 

and if youre a complete stranger? someone who follows me but has never interacted with anything ive posted? a mutual i havent spoken to yet? im here. and im bumbling, and awkward, and not the best at comfort but you can always come to me if you need someone. im only one man and im under a lot of stress but i swear ill do the best i can, even if its only reading and replying 3 days later and even then just listening and offer whatever gentle comfort or reassurance youll accept. 

because thats important to me. thats the impact i want to leave on this world. i dont ever want anyone to feel as small, as scared, as worthless, as alone as i have. im no fighter. im not going to lead any revolutions and hell im too anxious to even go to protests but im here for support. im here to help and heal. and thats important too

--

and if you listened to that? thank you. if you just skimmed? thank you for that too. if you shared it with someone? thank you (so much). and if you dont? thank you anyways, just for the time

just know this: i love you. i dont care who you are, if youre reading this i love you and im behind you 100%. im here if you need it. stay strong, do something that makes you smile if only for a moment. take that leap of faith. dont restrict yourself for even a second

i meant to go to bed at least two hours ago so goodnight <3 be safe, drink some water, if you have any kind of pet give it some love. take care of yourself. youre the most important person in your own world and never forget that, even if you dont think you are. even if theres something or someone you treasure above everything else. dont diminish your own worth! you are alive, and you are here, and theres nothing more important than that, really. the things you love matter more than anything else. hold them close

[nvelles]

alright. here we go again. it’s me – acacia. the garbage behind the queen that is noelle estrellas. since this is a new introduction, i’ll just post a little bit about me: i like kpop, fruit snacks, and milk tea. that’s it. so, hennyways, here’s the stuff you actually came for !!!!!! ✧･ﾟ:* \(◕‿◕✿)/ *:･ﾟ✧ &&. as per usual scroll down to the ☪ for her overall summary // aim: alohacacia && skype: alohacacia

****psa you clicked on this so you’re obligated to plot with me srry but i don’t make the rules.

— ( camila mendes. cisfemale. she/her. ) have you met ( noelle estrellas ) yet? the ( twenty-three ) year old ( tattoo artist )? yeah, we shared a cab and now i’m late but can you blame me? ( she ) is so ( intelligent ), but now i see what they mean about ( her ) being a bit too ( cynical ).

BACKGROUND + TRIGGER WARNINGS: cheating, bullying 

well to kick things off, noelle is that one night stand baby. her biological father is named antonio. and her mom’s husband a.k.a her “dad” is named nicolás. then of course her mom is named rosalina. sorry if this is confusing. but just think about how noelle is gonna feel once she finds out about this.

once upon a time rosalina and nicolás were happily in love. like they were the high school sweethearts who ended up getting married and blah blah blah. but before she was born, there was a point in time where the two broke up. probably once they were both about to start freshman year of college. that’s when rosalina hooked up with antonio. rosalina obviously ended up getting pregnant. but she ended up making up with nicolás. SOOOOOOO…. nicolás thinks he’s noelle’s father. but he ain’t. antonio is.

noelle is completely unaware of the fact that her “dad” is not her real father. her mom is still in contact with antonio. obviously, keeping that a secret from both her husband and noelle. but it’s only because her antonio wants to be involved in noelle’s life. but rosalina refuses to have the two interact. meaning, just small updates from rosalina is the best antonio’s going to get. so basically this family is a mess. 

but only on the low. because on the outside this family is absolutely perfect. she grew up in a really nice household. upper class type of wealth in the hamptons. big house, nice cars, a vacation every now and then. she was constantly spoiled. always given whatever she wants, whenever she wants. and of course, she’s used to getting her way all the time. if you couldn’t tell by the gif, she’s bad and boujee. her family is loaded. nicolás, being the chairman and co-owner of rosewood resort (hotels.) and rosalina, being a now retired model turned to a fashion designer. she’s always been surrounded by luxury and will continue to be.

noelle basically grew up in private schools. of course her parents wanted her to be the best of the best. so she was constantly put under (positive) pressure by the them. this of course results her to being the top student of her year every year. she never settled for less, for both them and herself. she doesn’t like to disappoint her parents ever. they are her support system and role models. she strives for their success (and even more than that.)

during high school, she was sort of a bully. she was very ruthless and cold. she had that, “i’ll do anything to get where i need to be,” personality. and if it meant paying someone to transfer the other student threatening her valedictorian spot, then yes, of course she’d do that. people either hated her or loved her. there was no in between. she kept her clique small. yes, a clique, which indeed was very exclusive. invite only. think of regina george. she ran her school and she liked to keep it that way. once she graduated she became more of an adult about things. of course her ruthlessness was still around, but a little more filtered. just a tad bit. she got accepted into almost every ivy league college. but ended up going to columbia university. 

however, while noelle craved for the attention in high school, she grew up to realize that wasn’t what she wanted for herself. growing up she always had an artistic eye. her mother (being a fashion designer) taught her all the techniques when it came to drawing for fashion. though eventually, noelle steered away from the clothing industry and found herself drawing more intricate works of art. her mother suggested on becoming an artist. but noelle had bigger plans. no one would have ever guessed that the hamptons barbie would become a tattoo artist. yup, that’s what she wanted to do. why? she loved the idea of tattoos. being inked with art that means something to you forever. and although her parents were hesitant with the idea, they eventually supported her dream because they saw how many people admired her work.

where is she now? she owns a tattoo parlor in williamsburg. it’s more on the pricey side of things. (noelle being v luxurious.) how she got to williamsburg? so, although she has a deep love for the hamptons. she found herself most comfortable in her family penthouse in williamsburg. a lot of her younger memories were spent their. mostly for family vacations. but the view was beautiful, more comforting, and she always just felt like she belonged. she is currently living alone. her parents still residing in the hamptons. however, they are always too busy traveling to stay in one place.

PERSONALITY + RELATIONSHIPS

noelle’s PERSONALITY is quite something. she has that tell it like it is personality. she just calls it likes she sees it. even if she’s not exactly right. she’s literally drowning in her riches. making her materialistic af. some people might think she’s that dumb bimbo rich bitch. but she’s actually very VERY smart. witty and intelligent to be exact. she’s very particular when it comes to most things. she wants things done correctly. so she often runs by the quote, “if you want things right you gotta do it yourself.” she doesn’t like relying on others to get things done when she knows she could do it faster and better. a little bit of a ocd queen. she’s very dedicated to her work, thus making her very goal oriented. she’s very creative when it comes to her tattoo designs. and she’s actually a very good artist, like drawing her sketches. i’m sure she picked up doodling and bullet journaling while growing up. *plays boss ass bitch vine.*

when it comes to FRIENDS she has plenty, at least in her head. she just knows a lot of people through her many connections. so she has many affiliations. but never real friends. she’s very particular with the people she associates herself with. she believes that those around you reflect who you are as a person as well. therefore, she only surrounds herself with the best of the best. she may not be the best person to tell your secrets too either because she’s quite the gossip queen. but she can probably persuade you to trust her. rip. however, if you are a close friend of her’s, she’s very loyal to those who are loyal to her. which means she’d never do you dirty. but that’s only if she really cares about you. she’s a really great listener and she’s willing to give advice to those are willing to take it. plus, she’s the type to spoil the people she loves. so expect the best christmas gifts ever if u rollin’ with her. honestly, she really does need to surround herself with good people with genuinely good intentions. so please, someone teach her what loyalty is. bonus points if they’ve been friends for awhile. displays loyalty.

please flood her with ENEMIES. i know for a fact that she has these. she was bully in high school. so you know this girl has more than enough haters. she uses people, she pushes people around, etc etc. like she has some very evil intentions. and i would love it even more if some of these enemies were girls that she caught her fiance with. that would juicy af. especially since she’s vengeful and irrational. while noelle does have some good intentions, she leans more to the chaotic evil side. she puts fuel to drama and loves to see people crash and burn. why? she wants that reassurance that she is flourishing above all. she never wants to be belittled and will do anything to remain on the very top. also, a rivalry would be perfect. especially if someone is damaging her business. because that’s her baby and she would do anything to protect that as well. noelle absolutely needs enemies. give her many. plenty. an abundance please.

alright, so noelle and LOVERS. i have a feeling she’s dabbled in the dating world. she’s had a few boyfriends, dates, etc. but most likely nothing LONG TERM. possibly because she doesn’t see the point unless it’s for marriage. just like her mom and dad (lol troll.) she has the independent woman facade going on right now. which makes her seem like she doesn’t want anyone. but deep down she’s a hopeless romantic. this girl would love to be loved. and she truly needs it. she’s probably read tons of books about love and fluffy shit like that. so she has high expectations when it comes to relationships. so someone rlly needs to come here and treat this girl right.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

FRIENDS

best friend — someone who will always be there for her. the person she feels most comfortable with. // m, f, or nb

partner in crime — they may not be the most reliable person like her best friend. but definitely someone she can get turnt tf up with. // m, f, or nb

childhood friend(s) — her first friend(s)! the one(s) she’s known since birth. she will never switch up on the real ones. (or so u think…) // m, f, or nb

exes — she’d be the type to still be friends with her ex. yes, they’ve loved each other. but they’ve come to terms they’re much better off platonic. // m or nb

ENEMIES

rivals — someone who hates her and some she hates too. maybe they just don’t get along yo. it happens // m, f, or nb

old flame that didn’t end well — maybe they wanted it to go further than just a date. but she ended up cutting ties with them. now it’s just made awk. // m, f, or nb

victim — someone she’s bullied in the past. just someone to constantly remind her that she’s a raging bitch. // m, f, or nb

used — someone she dated and she just basically used. most likely treated them as a toy in her little games in high school. // m, f, or nb

frienemies — just always trying to one up each other. whether it be with friends, family, or just life in general. they’re always in a secret competition. // m, f, or nb

LOVERS

hate/love — just ‘cause these are my favorites. just little bickering. maybe they’re too much alike or just not a like at all. // m or nb

old flame that ended well — the classic, exes that ended on good terms. they don’t hate each other at all. are actually still on really good terms. and possibly still have lingering feelings.  // m or nb

currently dating — going on dates and what not. having a good time. who knows where this could go.  // m or nb

publicity stunt — this would be good for the future. maybe her parents were starting to try and hook her up with random people. but she asked them to pretend to be her fake boyfriend. // m or nb

MISCELLANEOUS

☪ overall, this bitch is flippy floppy. an angel with a halo unbalanced with horns, not a devil but not a saint either?? kind yet has a backbone. softer than what she seems like. humorous and witty though understanding. mistrusting but willing to let loyalty speak. wealthy but tries not to depend on her family. and heavily involved in the king glitterati lifestyle. my muse inspo for her: chanel oberlin (scream queens), samantha borgens (stuck in love), and lydia martin (teen wolf). she’s chaotic neutral. she comes off as a bitch, but if you are her friend, she’s very very loyal to you. honestly, her life seems fine. she has parents that love her but push her to be the best of the best. she tears people down for shits and giggles. and can be quite manipulative. and she’s super family oriented. despite her being absolutely oblivious to the fact that her mom cheated on her “dad” with her biological dad. but overall, noelle is a beautiful, driven, judgmental, opinionated, artistic, and the most problematic head bitch in charge e v e r.

alright. if you made it to the end of this ilysm. this might be kinda confusing cause tbh i’m too lazy to proofread. but please like this shit if you wanna plot it uppppp.