#i want to revisit it when i get better :3
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ipleadbritney · 2 days ago
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could we please have ↻ FLIP FLOP for the first kiss scene in three-sixteenths???
thank you dear!!! 💕
- kitty 💕 (aka three-sixteenths’ biggest fan)
for @utopiastri who's really the sweetest!! ask game post here thank you for letting me revisit three-sixteenths in oscar's pov!!
3/16 the first kiss, flip flop
“Uncomfortable?” Lando repeats. 
“With my magic. I don't want to make you throw up, or, you know.”
Oscar himself is one wrong move away from throwing up, actually. Yesterday threw him in for a spinner. Every time he blinks, he conjures up the walls of Monaco around him, waiting and waiting. 
He hoped to get some rest today, to let his magic stretch over the new place. Nico Rosberg mentioned in an interview once how telekinesis in Monaco is different. Everything's lighter. Oscar wouldn't mind trying it. 
But Lando called, and, well. Oscar was already skimming teleportation crash guides in the middle of their call.
Lando and curses is a horrible combination. It's taking everything in Oscar not to panic.
Lando clears his throat. “I asked you to come here so you could probe at it. And I'm not throwing up. Magic reflects the person, right? I answered your call for a reason, and I'm glad I did.”
How can Oscar not panic when Lando just says the sweetest things like it's nothing?
But someone has to be calm between the two of them, and Oscar's not going to pass the responsibility on the person who's cursed.
He rubs at the empty space where his suppressor usually is. Calm down. “I'm glad you answered my call, Lando. I really am.” 
Better him than anyone else. If Oscar's right, then—
True Love's Kiss is a powerful spell that has wavered in popularity in recent decades. Most historians agree it is common for any spell to have crests and troughs. This particular case, however, has stumped some of the wisest living magical minds. 
Has humanity polluted our world to the point of a Great Spell extinction? Do we even need True Love's Kiss anymore?
Oscar forces a smile, ignoring his thoughts. Not much a textbook can help them with, right?
Lando smiles back. Oscar loosens up. 
Maybe it's not True Love's Kiss. 
What if it is?
It doesn't have to be. Oscar can just kiss Lando right now. Fix the curse after. Free Lando's wrist. Explain somehow along the way that he like Lando enough to think he'd break True Love's Kiss if it came down to it.
It won't. 
Lando's phone vibrates and lights up with a text notification. Oscar barely makes out the name Charlie. 
“Aren't you going to read that?” Oscar asks.
Lando shakes his head, still smiling. Dazed. “No, it's probably a stupid notif—” he checks his phone “—fucking finally, Charlie's awake.”
He's mouthing the words as he reads them, something that hasn't escaped Oscar. Cute, of course, but also. The text can't be that long. 
Lando sits up straighter. He's re-reading the text. Again and again.
Worry's bubbling up inside Oscar. Unfortunately, his worries have a nasty way of materializing through his magic.
So does Lando's. There's buzzing in the air, like static TV.
He tightens the control on his magic. He won't be of any help to Lando if he's a mess on his own.
After what must've been the 20th re-read, Oscar asks, “What did Charles say?”
“I need to kiss someone Italian. To break the curse, I need to kiss someone Italian.”
Lando all but throws his phone to Oscar for him to check. Charles’ texts confirm Oscar's suspicions, or at least part of it. Being right is such an overrated emotion. 
Can TLKs be bound by other conditions apart from the whole yeah you're my one true love? Kiss-curses that aren't TLK are even rarer. Leave it up to the Monaco Grand Prix to attract generational magic users who can randomly cast a kiss-curse.
What if Charles misheard it? Misunderstood. Mistranslated. 
What if he didn't?
“I hoped it would be different,” Oscar starts. “Not that you'll have a hard time finding someone Italian to kiss, no, but uh, Sophie will have our heads. Because it'll cause a riot, maybe. Then they'll resurrect us so Sophie can have our heads again.”
Please let the floor swallow Oscar whole.
“Thanks, I guess?” Lando says, and his face is so open, you can see every single emotion he's feeling right now. 
Oscar wonders if Lando can read him the same way. Like how he's no longer surprised when Oscar sticks close to him in public, anticipates it. Leaves a little bit of space for Oscar to slide through. It's the type of understanding and clarity Oscar's always wanted.
“You know, I'm 3/16 Italian,” Oscar blurts out. 
Lando half-splutters, half-laughs. “You don't have to cheer me up, Osc."
“I didn't say it to just cheer you up. I'm here to help. That's why I'm here, yeah?”
For the first time since coming here— which is the first time he's ever been in Lando's apartment and everything is Lando Lando Lando —Oscar's mind is clear. 
“Reckon it'll work?” 
“Won't know if we won't try."
Oscar can still backtrack. He can salvage the threads of their professional relationship. Nevermind that their professionalism has turned into Lando practically sitting on his lap during meetings because his seat doesn't “seat right”. 
But Lando's beaming. “Sure. Let's do it.”
Huh. It can't be that easy. It can only be that easy if Lando likes Oscar back. He doesn't. Probably. “Oh, okay.”
Nothing happens. Is it up to Oscar? Well, Lando's handcuffed to his bed, so. Oscar needs to, good God. Oscar needs to.
“Do you think it's supposed to be, like
” Oscar took three magic-related electives and none of them talked about breaking possible kiss-curses.
“Kiss on the mouth?” Lando’s smile grows even wider. Does he? Like Oscar back? “You're the magic nerd here.”
“I'm really not.”
“Go big or go home,” Lando says.
Suddenly Lando hooks a finger on Oscar's collar and pulls him closer. Oscar kneels in front of Lando, one of his legs bracketed by Lando's thighs. Lando's pretty like this, looking up at Oscar. 
Oscar touches Lando's cheek. “This okay?” he murmurs.
Lando closes his eyes and leans into his touch. Nods.
Oscar presses a soft kiss on Lando's mouth. The buzzing's gone, has been for a long time, maybe. 
He pulls back just the slightest, but Lando's kissing him. Oscar is reeled right back in, deeper this time. Lando holds him by his waist. Gentle but secure.
Oscar's dreamt of this before, but those didn't. Get the details correct. Lando's sighs. His taste. His magic.
Fuck, Oscar's own magic. He can feel it slipping out of his control.
Lando parts open his mouth, a permission for Oscar to take. How much can Oscar take? How much is he willing to take?
There's a clicking sound and a wash of strange magic, bursting then fading away.
The handcuffs. Oscar almost forgot about that. 
They move apart, which is a bit hard with Lando's fingers curled up in his shirt.
The curse leaves behind a cloud of gold and green glitter. A few specks land on Lando's nose then melt off. 
“I'll call you first if I ever get cursed again,” Lando says, laughing. There's a halo surrounding his head. Oscar's magic. 
“I'm 1/16 Chinese.” He returns to his spot at the foot of the bed. “Call me even if you're not cursed?” 
“Don't jinx it, mate.”
Oscar's not going to jinx it. No hexes or curses or any love spells, either. He doesn't trust his magic to not influence Lando. He puts his suppressor on, and it sucks the fucking air out of the room. 
“Sorry,” he tells Lando. “It's, I've got my suppressor back on.”
“Yeah, why?”
“Broke the curse already, didn't we?”
Lando tilts his head, assessing. “We did.”
What do they do now? 
Lando takes the lead, as he usually does. “Want lunch? I'll reserve us a spot, so don't leave. Give me, like, 15.”
As if Oscar would ever say no to lunch with Lando. “I'd like that, sure. Let's get lunch.”
If it hadn't been a kiss-curse, they would've probably kissed some more. Oscar tries not to be too hung up about it.
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mekammin · 2 years ago
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SPICE UP UR LIFE
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helicoprinus · 11 months ago
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i wish vacationing to another flight didn't come with a 1500g price tag. i'm partially considering switching flights but i don't want to go through the whole deal only to find out i don't like the new one and want to go back but have to wait 6 months And scrounge up *1500* gems on top
(tags of this post veer into a personal vent about my first time being a sheet attendant, just a head's up)
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my-current-obsession · 2 years ago
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Contemplating more Rune Factory “Special” changes/updates I’d like. In this case, things I’d like to see changed/added in a hypothetical, absolutely NEVER going to happen Rune Factory 4 Special+ (or Super Special, or Special 2, etc.)
Obviously since this game already has an updated rerelease, this isn’t happening. But there are still a few ways I think it could be brought even closer to perfection.
- So most of my wants for a theoretical “5 Special” came from 4 Special. Similarly there WERE actually several upgrades or quality-of-life changes made in 5 I’d love to see come back to 4 (or more realistically, maybe they’ll show up in 3 Special!).
- PLEASE let me just examine the stone/lumber box and add in all the materials I have instead of manually taking out stacks and putting them in. You can also do this for fodder bins and the fertilizer, which is nice, but the stone/lumber is the BIG one.
- Automatically picking up items as you run over them is great! I’d love to see that in other titles.
- Tabbing between storage options or categories when cooking/forging/crafting is super convenient. Hopefully that comes back, because after getting used to it in 5 I keenly feel its absence and get a smidge annoyed in 4 when I have to make something and then back out entirely to choose to make something else.
- Make Illuminata a romance option! It’s not clear if she was ever intended to be one and then scrapped, but personally I think she was. She is the only character outside the marriage candidates to have a swimsuit model & sprite, and she has several town events where she is a primary focus, similar to the events that are prerequisites for other bachelor/ettes. Plus she has lots of dialogue explicitly pointing out that she’s single and WANTS to find love. There’s really no reason NOT to make her a love interest other than her taking care of Amber, but if Amber is old enough to be romanced/married, then she’s old enough to live alone too. And Illuminata could continue to run her store after marrying the same way that every other love interest continues to do their job.
- I actually prefer the dragons in 5, but I know A LOT of people would love to see Venti as a love interest, and I’m not opposed to that. She’d be locked to a post-game romance, but she does have a human appearance and she seems to be into Lest/Frey (given her conversation where she blushes and starts to ask “If I were a human...”). Narratively she IS the person Lest/Frey cares about most so she’s got the role of a love interest already, kind of. It would be difficult to do since they’d need to add/change the story to allow her to change to her human form, and probably add a few town events for her, but it would be great if it happened. And perhaps including this would help the... abrupt ending to Act 3.
- Make it a little less ridiculous to romance Doug. I understand narratively why his friendship is INITIALLY gated at 3, but I think it’s ridiculous that it stays there until you’ve beaten Act 2 (which is basically the end of the story proper...). I think it would make sense to unlock the initial gate near the end of or after Act 1. After Doug comes around and basically decides to trust you and help Venti, or right after you beat Act 1 (saving Leon), I think you should be able to progress his friendship further. That said, it makes sense to keep his romance gated, so maybe until you’ve beaten Act 2, he stops progressing at LV 6. This way he won’t be SO far behind everyone else and if you want to romance him you’ll be able to do so almost immediately after he becomes available instead of taking several weeks just to get him from 3 to 7. As someone who dated multiple people in a run, Doug is at a HUGE disadvantage due to his late availability combo-ed with his affection almost surely being worse than everyone else. You either have to wait to date ANYONE to try and snag him first at LV 7 or basically give up in favor of dating others because it will only get harder to date him with every subsequent boyfriend and he will probably always lag behind in terms of affection, making any other guy easier to add to the harem by comparison. Literally all of this is mitigated by just raising his gated affection from 3 to 6 partway through the story. Depending on how long it takes you to complete Act 2 and whether you’re plying him with gifts, you might not even HIT the new limit, but even if you do, if you want to romance Doug it would be much quicker and easier now.
- Give players the ability to manipulate town events, at least a little. Technically players can already manipulate town events by determining when one happens and then just save scumming until they get what they want, but I want an in-game method that’s intended to help get the events you want. That said this IS an RNG system and I kind of like that. I wouldn’t want it to give you complete control. But I think something like adding “Orders” to the game at some point that allow you to, say, spawn “only town events involving [name]” would be GREAT. I won’t get into the particulars of how early the feature should be allowed (personally I think end of Act 1, but it could also be after Act 2 or an “Extra Order” reward for beating Act 3 and available from the beginning in any new game) or how much each Order would cost. I just think being able to force the game to only pick from town events involving a specific person (and including any mini-events) would be nice. Once you’ve seen all town events involving that person (excluding the marriage event, which has priority anyway) the order is automatically canceled. You could also cancel it yourself at any time. With this feature it would be MUCH easier to get the prerequisites for your intended spouse, but there is still some element of RNG considering everyone has at least a few events they’re involved in that AREN’T their needed events. This would also be great for trying to get mini events for characters you haven’t seen before.
- Some kind of weather forecast would be nice. With the exception of typhoons, people in town only comment on the weather that is currently happening. And you can still get taken by surprise if no one happens to mention the incoming typhoon or if you don’t talk to everyone. I believe weather is probably RNG as well, but if it was randomized and set like a week in advance, it would be nice if there was a way to check the weather for the next few days. Obviously this is most useful for making sure you KNOW a typhoon or snowstorm is coming and could wreck your farm. It also has other small uses - if you know a thunderstorm is happening you can remind yourself to go to the area that requires that to unlock. You can plan outdoor dates knowing the weather in advance. I don’t know about the airship or observatory but I KNOW there are variations of the lake date depending on the weather, so if you want to see them all you need the weather to comply. This way you’d know ahead of time and be able to plan for it.
- Lastly, either the game needs to be smarter about characters equipping everything they’re “given” or it needs to give players a way to directly, manually change other’s equipment from all the items they have. This is MOSTLY a problem with Kiel specifically since he has a reoccurring quest where he asks you to give him a weak shield and then he equips it EVEN IF IT’S SUBSTANTIALLY WORSE than whatever he had previously (and thus the better shield just DISAPPEARS), but in general I wish characters wouldn’t just automatically equip whatever you give them. If the system checked to be sure it was better than what they already had, that would be ideal. Of course, then you’d have to define what makes it better - which stats matter most, or is it the difficulty level of crafting/forging the item, etc. Alternatively, characters could have a stash of every equipment item you’ve ever given them and you can manually go in and decide what they actually equip (similar to the original .hack games, if anyone’s played those. In that game, characters did automatically equip “stronger” weapons/armor but you could manually change them to whatever you wanted that they had).
Overall I think 4 Special is an AMAZING game and I love it a lot. Most of my complaints are quality-of-life changes, compared to my more substantial issues with 5 (which is still like, but not as much. I like these games mostly for the social/romance aspect and that’s where 4 blows 5 out of the water even despite the RNG of town events making it way harder to actually marry who you want). In both games I long for more love interests, but that can’t be helped. Partly I just crave the extra content that would bring, though I do genuinely like and would want to marry some of those people if I could.
#rune factory#rf4#rune factory 4#for the record i will not be doing this kind of post for other rf games. simply because i haven't played any others#i mean i played some Tides of Destiny YEARS ago but i'm not familiar enough with the game now to suggest changes#maybe i'll revisit this topic when we get 3 Special (which will be my introduction to 3)#but anyway if i could make only ONE of these changes happen... i'd pick the town event manipulation#fun fact - i played lest my first run and was into margaret from the start. started dating her as soon as possible#in that file i have played over 2 full years & beaten rune prana. STILL haven't married her since i don't have all her needed events#(i decided i wasn't going to save scum for events. i wanted to get what i got and have relationships feel more organic as a result)#i did eventually cave and start dating other girls... and more girls... and am now literally dating ALL SIX of them#i've seen all but margaret and forte's marriage events. the only reason i DON'T have forte's is because i just recently started dating her#so i haven't gone on enough dates yet. but mark my words once that third date is done i'll get her marriage event immediately#leaving JUST margaret left. the girl i was MOST into as the LAST girl i marry. the RNG was not kind to me#my two frey runs have been much better by comparison but i am similarly struggling to get leon#so yeah as somewhat irritating as the other issues are and as nice as the QoL changes would be...#i would take more control over town events in a heartbeat. no hesitation. trying to get married in this game SUCKS
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marsprincess889 · 3 months ago
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VEDIC ASTRO OBSERVATIONS
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Part 3
More random and messy but still true
DISCLAIMER: if you consider some of these positive and others negative, then I want you guys to know that they come from my personal observations of real life. None of the nakshatras are better or worse, or positive or negative, these are just aspects of them, but nevertheless, true.
Magha people can have such an ego omg like I've said that before with rat yonis but P.Phalguni I think is nowhere near Magha in that department. Ashwini can also come off as egotistical, but it's moreso that they're unintentionally(or sometimes, intentionally) ignorant. Mula can also have egotistical tendencies, esp cause the galactic center(the black hole) is in Mula nakshatra, so they can have this "I'm the center of the world" attitude, but in my experience it manifests as just them mainly trusting themselves. All Ketu nakshatras have this theme of going inwards and shutting the world out, but since Magha is in the Sun ruled Leo (sun=ourselves, confidence) it can come off as undeservedely egotistical, different from Ashwinis aggressively(Aries/Mars) ignorant and Mula's relentlessly preachy(Sagittarius/Jupiter).
The Ashlesha to Jyeshta pipeline is actually very obvious, they're more connected than people realize. Obviously they're both Mercury nakshatras, but Ashlesha is often seen in a very sensual, feminine light and Jyeshta in a no-nonsense, cut to the chase light. The difference is that all that bottled up energy of Ashlesha, that was either healing or poisoning the native is ready to fight and be more direct in Jyeshta. They're both laser focused on survival and protecting themselves, desperately trying to realize themselves in the proccess, so it's a struggle. Both are trying to preserve their energy, but Ashlesha was trapped in the confines of the 4th house(family, roots,mother) and the sign of Cancer/Moon(emotions, fliudity, sensitivity), either for its safety or to its detriment, and was trying to get their energy out in a correct way. Jyeshta is out in the open, thrown in the sign of Scorpio/the 8th house/ passive Mars (transformation, rebirth, purging, sex, death, warfare, survival, defence. You and the other are one and the same in the 8th house). For Jyeshta, the only way to survive, is to win over everyone else, and when they eventually win, they gain dominion over others. So Jyeshta is kind of about revisiting that Ashlesha state and having the revenge, so to speak, because after gaining strength on your own, you eventually have to face the ones who you were so desperately trying to get away from(ashlesha).
Mulas can be so gentle and honestly at first I did not know where that came from, but since the last third of nakshatras are about transcending and mastering their ruling planet in a sense(btw, that does not mean that they embody the energy of the planet more, or that they're better) and Ketu is about primal instincts, then Mula is the place where the individual centers themselves in their truth and is unmoved by others, thus, avoiding unnecessary energy drainage. Of course, they can also be the most untamed of all, but in our civilized(mostly🙁) society, their natural demeanor is extremely calm.
Chitra natives are soooooo chaotic like calm down jesus. It makes sense when your consider that its gunas are TTT(tamas, tamas, tamas). Among the planets, Ketu is the most tamasic one(Chitra's ruler_Mars is also tamasic), but each nakshatra has their own guna(Ashwini is Rajas x3, Bharani is Rajas-Rajas-Tamas, Revati is Sattva x3, you get it). So Chitra people are the most chaotic, if I may say so. (Gotta credit The Hidden Octave's Chitra video for the observation). There are a lot of indicators that explain this but I've already written a lot in the previous ones😭 if you know basic vedic, this observation is of no surprise to you. They can also be prone to anxiety, but often they're unaware of it, so that has a detrimental effect on people around them.
Uttara Bhadrapadas are VERY hard to order around. Impossible even. Idk why someone would want to order someone else around but nevertheless, these natives can deal with any kind of unfairness with such grace, self-mastery and quiet strength that eventually nothing gets to them anymore. So if you see an U. Bhadra child disobey their superiors calmly and in a controlled but determined manner, you know why.
I really have a lot of respect for Uttara Ashadas(not all, lmao), because they just deal with stuff alone. And it's natural for them, and they don't do it for a goal(like in Jyeshta, which is not bad, it's just different) or for attention, it's just a way of life for them. Simplicity and stoicism đŸ€Œ
Okay, now a fun one: Moon girls (Rohini, Hasta and Shravana) are the blueprints of Y/N. If you guys don't know what Y/N please look it up. Not just Y/N, but characters like Bella Swan(hasta moon, rohini asc actress) and Elena Gilbert(shravana moon anctress) come to mind. Even popular instagram users who parody those movies/fanfics/characters have moon placements(@laframbuesaa_ rohini moon if i remember correctly and @yasmine_sahid_ shravana moon(?) on insta). Even Harry fcking styles, who is probably the most common love interest in those fanfics has hasta moon. If you know a little about nakshatras, this makes sooo much sense. Moon is something that masses can understand and digest easily, so it's not complicated and sometimes, it can verge on delusions(or an insane sensitivity and receptivity and the ability to read between the lines, but that's just for a number of their natives). Other nakshatras that can fall into the Y/N trope are venus and ketu nakshatras, but moon is the most classic example of it.
I want confirmation in the comments/reblogs for this one: Bharani natives love high fantasy, history(esp medieval), fantasy in general and/or just everything/anything with that vibe. Cause I'm bharani moon and I do, and I've seen some other examples. If not, then the Bharani natives themselves seem like they're out of those times/stories. I can't explain it in any other way. (This might be true for Bharani Ketu too.)
Alright, this is all. Reblog, comment, like. Interact please
Take care
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enjisbf · 7 months ago
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Hungry man
° Pairing: Enji Todoroki x fem!reader
word count: 935 words
summary: During the first heat spent together, Enji finally gets a taste of your slick. Also, reader has a quirk that gives her bunny attributes (ears and tail + behaviour)
warnings: nsfw (duh), lots of pet names, fingering (fem receiving from herself and m), praises and thigh riding! (if i missed anything, pls tell me!)
author's notes: I need to get this out there before it consumes my whole being, folks. This is basically the origin of pussywhipped!enji lmao. The idea wouldn't leave my mind ever since I revisited this fic by @nyxronomicon (great great great writer by the way, i devour all of their fics so check it out <3). Actually, that fic could be the continuity of this one if you don't think too hard. Anywayz, I'm rambling I know most of you just want the unhinged thoughts sooo hope you enjoy !!! <3 Again, any mispells or mistakes left are my fault ;-; (tried to proofread it but blergh boring)
⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅──╯╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅──╯╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅─
The first time Enji had gotten a taste of your sweet ambrosia, it had been an accident. It happened during your first heat spent together. You were being such a sweet bunny now that he thinks about it, playing with yourself so he could rest after the rigorous day spent together for the first time.  
However, you couldn’t help yourself. Your fingers were no match to his thicker ones, you were twisting and flicking your wrist in vain, trying to find the right rhythm. Growing frustrated, whines turned higher pitched, trying all sorts of positions to ease the tight knot in your tummy.  
With all the noises leaving your mouth, it was inevitable for the flame hero to slowly arouse from slumber. Eyelids still heavy with sleep, he rubbed his eyes while sitting up against the headboard to pull you onto his lap, but Enji didn’t account for his pretty bunny to be so pent up that she just straddled his thigh and started riding it. 
Now, Enji was a strong man and his stamina had to be good to be Japan’s number one hero, but he was only a simple man at the end of it. So, when this simple man saw his good bunny desperate to rub her clit on his strong thigh, he couldn’t do anything but watch. Well watch and flex the muscle under her.  
“Fuck, baby, look at you being such a good bunny.” His dick was probably crying from all the action it had gotten, but fuck, it was still trying its best when the flame hero heard his bunny’s whines. “My pretty baby was trying to let me rest, huh love? Don’t worry about that next time. It’s all yours, my legs, -” He flexed his thigh once more for good measure. A whimper escaping your mouth at his words and at the added pressure, making the friction on your bundle of nerves so much better. “my fingers an-” He quickly shut his mouth when you grabbed his right hand and directed it near your lower puffy lips while continuing to ride him.  
“Enji, fuck Jiji, please please can I have your fingers. Please, they’re so much bigger and fuck- I- I just want them in me, baby.”  
Did Enji die and wake up in paradise? Here you were, your slick covering his upper leg, your mouth in a pretty pout, your pupils taking over your irises, lust painted all over your face, and you were begging for him to finger you. You were so good, waiting for his approval, for his ‘yes’ even if he could see tremors taking hold of your body from the frustration dancing in your bones.  
In awe of his luck, the number one hero just nodded in response to your pleas. His fingers pressed on your puffy lips when you stopped directing him. Of course, you were just waiting for him to finally easy the knot in your stomach, but your Jiji seemed to be in a lust haze thinking you were waiting for his fingers to be less dry. It didn’t matter that your slick was plenty enough already. Enji couldn’t feel, see nor think clearly.  
So, as Japan’s best hero, he executed the best course of action, sucking his fingers. You, on the other hand, were on the verge of tears, when you felt his fingers leave your wet cunt. Your frustration didn’t get the chance to be voiced out when you heard Enji’s groan.  
He couldn’t believe it. As his fingertips grazed his tastebuds, he couldn’t believe that he hadn’t had a taste beforehand. Your slick was coating his fingers, coating his tongue, mixing in with his saliva, dripping down his throat. He audibly groaned at the taste of yourself. He had to get more, he needed to have more. He licked every last drop of your juices before parting ways with his slick covered fingers.  
“Fuck, think you can give me more of that, bunny?” You just nodded your head at him, excited to have his fingers back to yourself now. “Yes, yes, yes, just- please please just make the pain go away, Jiji.” Your lover cooed at you as two of his thick fingers thrust in one stroke in your pussy, making you cry out from the relief. His bunny was chanting Thank you’s, love and lust dancing around every letter, syllable escaping your throat.   
He couldn’t wait to get his mouth on your ambrosia once more, but first he had to make you feel better. Had to see just how well you took him whether it be his cock, his fingers and fuck his tongue soon.  
It didn’t take much from the hero to make you cum, you were already on the edge of an orgasm, on the cusp of it from all your attempts earlier, you riding his thigh, and now his fingers. Finally, you felt the knot in your stomach untangling itself, coming loose. Incoherent words and noises graced Enji’s ears as he worked you through your orgasm. His eyes glancing from your face to the arousal leaking out of your lips to his fingers. 
The both of you knew that it wouldn’t take long before the pain would come back in your stomach, but before you could voice out anything, the number one spoke up. His eyes sparkling at the idea of drinking directly from you.  
“Fuck, bunny, think you can give me another one?”  
Suffice to say that that night, Enji Todoroki learnt a new skill, because who would you be to pass up that kind of service from your beloved? <3  
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ivesambrose · 2 months ago
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PAC : YOUR AUTUMN BLESSINGS 🍁
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1. 2. 3.
May the remaining months of 2024 lead to a favorable plot twist for all of you reading this đŸ–€
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‱ A lot of you will be blessed with foreign travel to a destination that heals this restlessness in your heart. It seems as though you had been fighting against the odds for so long and have also accumulated so much mental strain and grief because you've felt like you couldn't grow where you're at and you're right. You're going to feel the most alive you've felt in a long time. Don't turn down the opportunities that come your way. ‱ Unexpected wealth or income from an unknown or foreign source. ‱ Venturing out of your home or comfort zone. A change in perspective as well. ‱ The sun rising after the darkest hours of your life. It's amusing that it's happening during fall when things usually wither away that you're getting your color back. You may feel like you're Venturing out alone or that your journey is a solitary one. You aren't too bothered because you're so used to it even as it terrifies you. But along the way you'll find people who want to walk beside you even as the cold threatens to sink into your bones. You might just find your soul family this fall. Perhaps home isn't confined to four walls but rather, the people and the places you've yet to step foot into.
Picture 2
‱ You'll be blessed with finding a balance in your life that earlier was bound to topple over no matter what you did and how hard you tried. You'll confront certain habits and behaviours that you have and actively choose to work through them. Some of them have been hindering your growth and costing you your own peace of mind as well as relationships. ‱ Improvement in health. As well as recognition and reward in your workplace or emotional fulfillment via the work you do or your lifestyle changes. ‱ Heightened intuition and foresight. Trust your instincts over fear mongering from others. ‱ Possible expansion in social circle or connecting with people you can learn from without being ridiculed. You'll be introduced to people or spaces with a more positive outlook to life and circumstances rather than the ones who have a cynical approach to everything. ‱ A better self concept and increase in confidence. Do not allow anyone to walk over you or be little you in any shape or form. ‱ you may also get the confidence or the money to shop for certain fashion items you had earlier been stalling on or might be gifted the same.
Picture 3
‱ You'll be blessed with something rather abrupt. You may not even consider it as a blessing at first till realisation dawns on you. ‱ I significantly see a blessing that's financial in nature something that will aid you in the long term. You might be too fixated at things going wrong at first. Please don't do that. When the opportunity arrives please have the courage to reach for it and make it yours. You may have the tendency to worry to the point that anything good happening for you is too good to be true. Thing is you tend to be blessed in rather unconventional ways. Certain things you may have quiet literally looked over for months or years. This autumn take some time to reflect on certain aspects of your life and how regardless of what was going wrong or what wasn't 'working out' for you had been in your favor all along. The more you bring in your awareness to that the more of these blessings you'll receive. ‱ A lot of you do struggle with mental health as well as sleep issues. You're rather artistic however but may have kept your arts and crafts aside for a long time. You'll be revisiting things that have brought you joy in the past and feel happy this time instead of feeling performative. ‱ Lastly, allow good things to happen to you.
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megumiluvv · 4 months ago
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Challenge
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Cont: established relationship, Takuma Ino x fem!reader, dry humping, pet names and praise (pretty, baby, babe, pretty girl, etc.), single use of “good boy” that makes Ino cream his pants (same), competition and dirty talk, Ino is such a silly guy I love him
Word count: ~500
Masterlist
A/N: sorry for taking forever to post, I went to the chiropractor and had lunch with my mom :) I’m deprived of Ino content, and this has been in the drafts for a week because I convinced myself that I didn’t like it. But the part two I have in mind(If people like it) is better thought out. Idk. likes and reblogs are appreciated!! <3
ă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽ ❀ ă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽă€°ïžŽ
“Hey babe?” Your sweet voice calls to Ino.
“Yeah?” He replies, in the other room because he was turned on by seeing you sat on the bed so prettily.
“Wanna try something, stop getting your boner down and come here.”
“Oh? What does my pretty girl want?” He smiles and comes out of his hiding place and back into the bedroom.
“So, I was scrolling through my twitter, as I do, and I came across something that sounds fun. I know how you love a competition.”
“It’s not a threesome is it? I know we both love Nanami, but I don’t think he’d be up for that.”
“We’ll revisit that, but this is different.” You laugh.
“What’s the competition?”
“We grind against each other and stay clothed, and whoever cums first has to do what the other says.” Your grin is so mischievous, it’d be hard for him to say no. Luckily for you both, Ino is always up for a challenge.
“Baby, your pretty brain is soooo big and wrinkly, I wanna kiss it.” He grins and practically pounces on you and kisses you.
He instantly starts grinding his sensitive tip against your clit through the both of your clothes, hissing at the contact but loving your reaction. He messily kisses you, swirling your tongues together and bringing his hands to your hair and tangling into the strands.
“Baby, I dunno how long I’ll last,” the brunette mumbles as he kisses you, “but I wanna see if I can win, so I’ll hold it back as best I can.”
“Mhm, me too,” you hum back into his lips, eagerly accepting the feel of his boner against your throbbing clit.
“You like that, pretty girl? Feels good, yeah?” He groans softly into your mouth, hands tightening in your hair.
“Mhm, I love it, ‘kuma.”
“Yeah, you know what I love?”
“Hm?” You hum into his neck as he leans close to your ear.
“This pretty girl under me.” Ino grins, his breath hot against your ear.
It works up the both of you more and you start kissing his neck, making it harder for him to keep his composure.
“God, you’re so gorgeous, my pretty baby,” he whines, making more noise than you as you two do this. “So hard not to cream my pants right now
”
“Aww, is my silly boyfriend struggling to hold his load?” You giggle into a half-moan, his tip brushing just right against your clit through the fabric of your pants.
“Hey, ‘m not silly,” he mumbles and picks up his pace, accepting that he’ll probably end up cumming first.
“You are, but you’re so handsome too. And you’re such a good boy, can’t wait for you to prove it when you cum and you get to listen to me.”
Your words only work him up more, and he ends up cumming in his pants, whining at the sensitivity and his now-ruined sorcerer pants. Some of the sticky substance leaks through the fabric and his ears burn red in embarrassment, all while you giggle.
“Wow, ‘kuma, made a mess from being called a good boy?” You tease.
“Sh-shut up, it wasn’t that
”
“Mhm, sure.” You giggle as he lightly smacks you.
“What’s my punishment, pretty girl?”
“Just you wait and see.”
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absolutebl · 16 days ago
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This Week in BL - Many Tiny Idiots, Some Irreverent Hotness & an Engagement
Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.
Oct 2024 Week 4
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Ongoing Series - Thai
Fourever You (Thai Thurs YT) ep 4 of 16 - OK so Hill has really been trying to pick him up from the beginning? I don’t understand why there’s any doubt around girls at all. He Gay everyone. Why is Tatch (2 Moons Ambassador) the only seme in Thai BL history allowed to actually just say "I don’t date women.”
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Why is that so hard?
This show is definitely frustrating me, but I must admit that it’s the one I look forward to the most each week.
Love Sick 2024 (Thai Sun iQIYI) ep 6 of 15 - I am now only watching the uncut version, and I gotta say it makes all the difference. Please don’t watch the cut version of this show if you can possibly help it. It’s like cliff's notes of cliff's notes. I love the tiny side couple of tough kid + the dork of the music club. Ah the beach sequence. Condenced WAY DOWN, I see. We lost one of the most iconic lines in all BL but i think everything is improved by how much tighter the plot is in the remake (6 episodes became 1!). So I’m enjoying it. Weirdly, I'm not sure I would be enjoying it, if I hadn’t seen the original.
Is anyone watching this on iQIYI who hasn't seen the original? Just out of curiosity. Tell me how it's going for you, would ya? 
I'm doing a face-off style watch along of this new version versus the original 2014-2015 version.
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Kidnap (Fri YT) ep 8 of 12 - I don’t entirely get it. They were apart for approximately 11 minutes. I would’ve thought GMMTV would’ve drawn it out for longer and more angst. Smiley face kiss was cute, but the star of this ep was that gorgeous pale blue waffle sweater on Q. What a great color for Leng! 
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Jack & Joker (Thai Mon IQIYI) ep 7 of 12 - I do like that we’re seeing an honest exploration of poverty and hopelessness. I’m not sure how I feel about it inside my BL, tho I’m willing to persavere for this pair.
Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 12 end - Someone said recently "just imagine what TutorYim could do with an actual script." And you know what? I agree. Because they sure as shit haven’t gotten one yet. And it’s getting quite frustrating. I’m having JaFirst flashbacks. Frankly, 2024 has been a year of unmitigated BL nonsense narratives. And I’m tired of it. I know it’s bog standard for the genre, but it feels like there’s been more than normal faff this year.
Summary 
An incredibly convoluted, disjointed, and badly-paced drama that is about(?) some writers writing a thing and some boys who knew each other when they were kids, lots of pretty sexy times, and not much else. The visuals are gorgeous, the side couples are overly appealing (with little to no screen time), the dubbing and sound is absurdly bad, and the fantasy novel (play within a play) makes no sense whatsoever while also managing to be the show that we all actually wanted to see instead of what we were given. 6/10 
In conclusion, I have no interest in attempting to understand or revisit this show, and I certainly wouldn’t recommend it, but if you have nothing better to do

 the sex is good (frankly I have exes that satisfy all the same criteria). So there it is: this show is like a bad but still hot ex.  
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Every You Every Me (Thai Mon Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - Nice to see Fiat in something again. Namping is very angel baby.  This episode made me think that this pair would do a great Thai remake of Love Tractor, and now that’s pretty much all I want in life. I enjoyed wardrobe in this episode. It looks like we get the same characters next week. Cool. 
Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - I guess everyone is messy slutty bisexual in this show? Do I care? Not even slightly. BLabies, I don’t think I’m gonna make it. I might have to drop this one.
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Ongoing Series - Not Thai
See Your Love (Taiwan Weds Gaga) ep 1-2 of 13 - I adore it, what a wonderful meet cute. I love a Taiwanese BL that starts with a gratuitous kidnapping, some chasing, and a bit of a fight sequence. We in OLD fashioned territory. 
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Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 5 of ? - I continue to enjoy it very much.
My Damn Business (Korea Sat YT) eps 4 of 7 - Oh! Is the sleazy boss gonna turn out to be actually a sleazy player? That would be an interesting twist.
Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo (Korea Thurs Gaga) eps 3 of 8 - I’m really not a big fan of my pain coming from Korea. I’m getting a whiff of To My Star 2 from this one. And that does not make me happy. I know: high quality high angst yada yada blah blah blah. But also unnecessary pain? No thank you. 
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First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) ep 12 end - Of course, I love the part where Reese and Orca spoke each other’s languages.
Conclusion
Had this been produced a mere 3 or 4 years ago, I would’ve been quite enamored. But by comparison to what we’ve been getting, this is a lackluster offering. A has-been musician and a much younger composer meet, fall in love, and attempt to rectify his stalled musical career. Cute side couple of a Thai popstar + his Korean manager. Everyone is very fine and it was a fine show. I wasn’t disappointed, but I wasn’t impressed either. 8/10 
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Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues Netflix?) 6 of 10 eps - It was a fun little confession and climax, there was crying, and a bridge kiss (been a while) all of this appeals to me even if they are tiny idiots (in the immortal words of @heretherebedork )
Eccentric Romance (Korea Weds Viki) eps 5-6 of 12 - More tiny idiot boyfriends who don’t realize they’re boyfriends. That’s it, that’s all that’s happening. Ostensibly there’s some kind of murder. But it seems to be acting more like set dressing than plot.
It's airing but...
The Hidden Moon (Sat WeTV) 10 eps - Supernatural romance (my ghost boyfriend trope) by Violet Rain (I Feel You Linger). A man is hired to write an article about an old mansion. He sees the ghosts of people who died at the mansion, falls in love with one of them. Was substantially recast. I loved IFYLITA except the ending so I think I'll let this one run it's course you can tell me if it's work tracking down... if they managed to land it. I have my doubts.
In case you missed it
Mew & Tul legit engaged.
Love in the Big City (Korea Viki) 8ep - Vicki dropped them all at once which means I did what I do under such circumstances and skipped to watch the final episode. (I am well aware that this makes me a monster. ) Anygay, that told me that I’m not gonna be bothering to watch the series. Now y'all can tell me how amazing it is and what I’ve missed and blah blah blah. But I’m comfortable with my choice. It’s ICRY 2.0 + HIV. And I’m not willing to play its literatti game. At some point I might watch it on fast-forward for the sex scenes, but I’m not at that point yet. 
Next Week Looks Like This:
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Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.
Still Coming:
10/27 Perfect 10 Liners (Thai Sun YouTube?) 24 eps! - New directing yet another university BL with engineers + their mentees. Based on a Jittirain novel. with a massive cast and massive run time. We will be watching this until APRIL of 2025!
ForceBook playing the same old characters = enemies to lovers tsunder/sunshine jock/nerd thing.
PerthChimonSanta are doing the cohabitation cool guy/dork trope.
JuniorMark are doing popular sunshine meets lonely sad boy (the only interesting pair IMHO).
I think Blue Canvas of Youthful Days has started on iQIYI but I only get it on Viki and that doesn't drop for a few days, plus...... CBL......? Not sure I'll report on this one unless it's really good.
THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS
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From Uncle Unknown which is truly terrible but this was so SO funny. I'm still chuckling when I think about it.
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The first representation of shipping in a BL that I actually enjoyed. Also Dat's clear approval of being shipped didn't hurt. (Judge)
(lask week)
The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs
Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many at-ings.
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godmadeaterribleerror · 4 months ago
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Chapter 3 - You've Torn Your Dress
Series Masterlist
Author's Note: This one's the first of many doozies. I recommend you clock out now if you think the following will distress you: mentions of rape, but no scenes or explicit description. If not, read on! Chapter Title is from Rebel Rebel by David Bowie.
Word Count: 7.7k
Chapter Summary/Warnings: Your first mission is delivered, and it goes about as expected. Contains usual tags, emphasis on mention of rape/non-con.
Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, enemies to friends to lovers, canon divergence, slow burn, angst
Read on A03!
Chapter 2 - Chapter 4
Want to be tagged? Just ask!
When your team stepped into the safe house, you could see the moment the smell hit their noses.
“Merde,” Frenchie was the first to speak, a poor omen within itself. “What the fuck am I smelling?”
“Uh, probably the milk and meat. They’re the strongest.”
Annie said your name carefully, watching your reaction as she spoke. “What happened.”
“He wouldn’t put away the groceries.” You said with a shrug. You were over it. It was like, ten bad things ago.
“So you just. Left them out?” Hughie said, seemingly baffled.
“Yeah.”
“Mallory said she delivered them on the first night.” Annie glanced between you and Hughie.
“She did.”
Hughie’s eyes widened further. “That was almost two weeks ago.” When you just nodded in agreement, he pushed further. “They’ve been out the whole time?”
You frowned. “He doesn’t get to win.”
“What are you, five?” 
You just sighed, giving Hughie a pleading look. “Don’t tell MM.”
“What?” Butcher taunted from the back of the group. “That he was right, and you can’t handle Soldier Boy?”
“I thought you were on my side about this.”
“I’m on the side of the truth, Love.”
Both you, Annie, and Frenchie let out huffs of amusement at that claim, with Hughie looking sheepishly amused.
“You can’t possibly believe that.” Annie gave Butcher a pointed look. He only winked in response, leaving her to turn back to you with an eye roll.
“Has it been like this,” Hughie gestured vaguely around him. “The whole time?”
“Nah. Worse.”
Really, hell would be a better word for it. After the knife incident, there had been the toilet paper incident, which you had won, the coffee incident, also your victory, the laundry incident, point Soldier Boy, the TV incident, point you, and the Lord of the Rings incident, another point Soldier Boy. The Elton John, Jimmy Carter, and Rockefeller Center incidents had ended in stalemates akin to the Cold War, but should those fuses reignite, you were sure you could take them home. Overall, you’d burned him seven times, he’d thrown two chairs at you, you tossed shit in his face once and threatened castration on fifteen separate occasions, and he had offered to sleep with you thirty-one times.
“He hasn’t, he hasn’t hurt you. Right?” Hughie wasn’t fully looking at you when he asked, his voice soft and nervous.
“No. I mean, he’s tried. Not in
 that way, but I’ve had a few things thrown at me. All the physical violence died out around the laundry incident, though. Now we’re using psychological warfare.”
“Laundry incident?” Hughie said at the same time that Frenchie said, “Psychological warfare?”
“Don’t ask.” Was your response to both. You’d avoid revisiting the laundry incident in your mind for the rest of your life if you could help it, and the actual practice of your warfare was more childish than you’d like to admit.
“Well, as lovely as a reunion this has been, we need to talk to you both. Where’s the cunt,  anyway?" Butcher craned his neck to look down the hall.
“Probably moping around in his room.” You shrugged. “Let’s talk in the living room, standing at the door is weird.”
While the living room hadn’t taken even close to as much damage as the kitchen, it had not escaped you and Soldier Boy’s sparring unscathed. Books provided by the CIA, which were mostly stereotypical classics, had been upended from their shelves and strewn across the floor. The TV was still intact, as was the sofa, but the former was stuck on PBS, and the latter was, at this point, compromised of 70% trash.
“Holy shit,” Hughie muttered as he stepped over a copy of Catcher in the Rye. “You can’t plan on living like this the whole time?”
“Well, if America’s number one man-baby would stop moaning and bitching about his glory days, then maybe, yeah.”
Annie gave you a concerned look. “And if he doesn’t?”
“Then I’ll castrate him.” Though the threat had now been made sixteen times, it never satisfied you less to say it.
“I’ve told you, Sunshine, if you did that, you would only be hurting yourself.”
Everyone in the room fell silent, their eyes trained over you with tense gazes. You turned to find Soldier Boy almost directly behind you. “I’ve told you, by definition, I’d only be hurting you.”
He gave a mocking pout. “Wouldn’t that plague your perfect little conscious?”
“I’d live.”
“Bitch.”
“Cunt.”
“Prude.”
“Manwhore.”
“Whiny Brat.”
“Waste of space.”
“Waste of good pussy.”
“Waste of government money.”
“Waste of Compound V.”
“Pathetic, assfaced Dickwad.”
“Stuck up, pretentious Ice Queen.”
“Geriatric, entitled, blue-balled G.I. Joe Fuckdoll”
The room had practically vanished around you as you and Soldier Boy fell into your now well-tread path of insults. Your blood was burning with that feeling, aching to burst across the room as both of you glared hard enough to, fingers crossed, kill the other.
“Jesus Christ,” Hughie said, breaking you out of your own spell.
“What are they doing here?” Soilder Boy asked, somehow having only just clocked their presence. “Do I finally get to do my job and leave?”
“No,” Annie answered. “We have no way of knowing how long you’ll be here at this point.”
“That’s what I said,” you muttered under your breath, turning back to your team.
“Yeah,” Soldier Boy said at full volume. “And I don’t fucking trust you.”
“Will you get off my ass about it now?”
“I think you like me on your ass, Sunshine. My offer never leaves the table.”
“Cunt.”
“Bitch.”
“Helpless man-child.”
“Prissy tease.”
“Glorified propaganda poster-“
“No,” Annie cut it. “We’re not doing that again.”
“Party pooper,” Butcher grumbled. “I was hoping they’d kill each other this time. Then we could just go home.”
“Well, did you at least bring me drugs?” Soldier Boy seemed to search the room, as if a pile of weed and coke would miraculously appear on the floor amongst the mess of wrappers and fluid-filled paper towels.
“We’re not buying you drugs with government money.” Annie said, giving you a look of apology. “As I’m sure you’ve been told.”
“Many times,” you affirm under your breath. You’d had to hide the glue on day five, which had let to the toilet paper incident on day six. A day had not passed since where you didn’t catch him trying to turn a new household object into something to snort.
“I thought weed was fucking legal now.” Soldier Boy glared at you, as if you were personally responsible for the CIA not buying him blunts. “It’s a free fucking country. I should be able to smoke whenever I damn please.”
“Porn is legal,” you reply. “Doesn’t mean the federal government is going to bring you some.”
“If they brought me porn and weed, I’d be far more open to whatever shit you want from me.” He winked at you.
“We gave you that last time,” Hughie pointed out, shifting nervously. “It barely helped.”
“Will you be a good little supe if we come back with porn and weed? Because we can go and-“
“No, we need to do this now.” Annie spoke over Butcher, and you noticed a line of worry on her forehead, along with Hughie’s nervous fidgeting. Though Butcher didn’t seem plagued by an anxious tell, he relented to Annie faster than you’d ever seen, and alarm bells went off in your head.
“Annie,” you bit the bullet, asking softly. “What is the ‘this’ you need us for?”
She gave you an apologetic look. “Trial run.”
“Trial run?”
“We’re giving you a test, Love.” Butcher said with a smirk. “See if your little experiment is even viable. Maybe take out a player in the process. All depends on if you and him,” he jerked his head to Soldier Boy. “Do your jobs right.”
“I don’t need your little ‘test’ to know if I can do my job.” Soldier Boy snapped.
“Last time you failed,” Hughie muttered.
Frenchie nodded in agreement. “In a spectacular manner, yes.”
“Because that bitch and that pussy stopped me.” An angry scowl was thrown at Annie and Butcher, who returned it and grinned widely back respectively.
“You were going to kill a kid,” Annie said coldly.
“He shouldn’t have been in the line of fire.”
“The line of fire? Do you hear yourself? Do you really care about others so little that-“
“I’d do it again,” he snapped back, unbothered by Annie’s disgust. “You don’t get to ask me for help and get mad when I do.”
You gave Butcher a pointed look. “Aren’t you glad you listened to me?”
Though all you got in response was a grunt from Butcher, Soldier Boy’s eyes shot to you. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
You returned his glare, steeling your own eyes to match his interrogating gaze. “We’re removing the ‘kill a kid’ option from your choices. You want to know why we’re stuck here? Because you fucked it last time, and we won’t let you fuck up again.”
“You won’t let me?” He sneered, leering at you coldly. “You don’t let me do anything, Sunshine.”
If the “Sunshine” thing continued to stick, you might have to throw yourself off a roof. But you didn’t flinch, just tilting your head mockingly. “You wouldn’t need a shock collar if you hadn’t bit the hand.”
“I wouldn’t bite the hand if it hadn’t tried to kill me.”
“Nobody tried to kill you, Mate.” Butcher interjected. Soldier Boy’s anger switched back to him with fists curling at his side, but Butcher kept talking with a bored drawl. “You shouldn’t have bloody fucked up.”
“And, like I said,” you shrugged. “It won’t happen again.”
“If I see the shot, I’ll take it. Whether you like it or not.”
Looking into his eyes, you believed him. No doubt fogged your brain that, given the opportunity, Soldier Boy wouldn’t hesitate to take out Ryan Butcher with Homelander. Part of you, the angry and bitter part still trapped underground, understood that. But you’d see Ryan once, from afar, and he had looked so young. You didn’t have to imagine his fear or touch him to understand what it was like. For your life to change abruptly and without reason, to have to sprint to keep up with your new one. Soldier Boy had volunteered for this life. Ryan hadn’t. You hadn’t.
So, holding Soldier Boy’s gaze, you made your voice clear and steady. “You don’t get to take the shot until it’s clear. Ryan will be out of the picture before you even see Homelander.” You turned to Annie. “What’s the test?”
“Head-popper.” Butcher answered for Annie with an odd look at you. His voice carried the usual light and oddly joyful tone he used when discussing murdering supes, but his eyes on yours were quieter, with less manic vengeance than you’d seen before. If you didn’t know better, you’d call them thankful.
“Head-popper?”
Hughie jumped in at your confused frown. “Neuman.”
“Oh,” you paused, looking over Hughie’s worried face. “We’re going after Neuman?”
“Who the fuck is Neuman?” Soldier Boy asked with a reluctant grumble. You had picked up on his consistent annoyance with new things after you’d found him screaming at the microwave three days ago, and not knowing new people didn’t seem to be any different.
“She’s a supe who can pop people’s heads like balloons.” Frenchie gestured in imitation for effect. “It’s disgusting.”
“And she’s the VP elect, which would put an ally of Homelander in the White House, one step from the Oval Office.” Annie said pointedly, giving Frenchie a look. You offered him a small smile over her head. Though the demonstration hadn’t been helpful, watching his hands fly around mimicking Neuman’s powers was undeniably entertaining.
“She's dangerous,” Hughie added. “But she’s not a bad person. We don’t want to kill her, just remove her powers.”
“What do we need her for then?” You didn’t have to look to know Soldier Boy’s accusation was directed at you. You bit your tongue, trying to ignore the way the words seeped into your skin.
Because he’s right. A cruel whisper said into your ear, and the itch on your skin began to feel like a rash. You were saved from the plague of your thoughts—the urgent feeling to fall prompted by almost nothing—by Butcher.
“If you think you’re going anywhere without her, Governor, you’d better get used to being wrong. She’s there for the same reason she’s here. So you don’t go postal.”
Soldier Boy gave you an unreadable look as the rush of your heart in your chest slowed from Butcher’s words. You turned away from him, but you could almost feel his eyes through your skull as you looked at Butcher with a blank face.
“What’s the plan?” You asked, praying it would be simple, with as few people as possible around and, ideally, in the middle of a desert filled exclusively with fire extinguishers.
“MM and Kimiko are doing recon on one of Bob Singer’s rallies. Frenchie will create a distraction for the secret service, and Neuman’s personal detail is going to suddenly disappear-“
“Disappear?” You interrupted Butcher with raised eyebrows.
“Keep your panties on, they’ve been bribed. Once she’s isolated, Soldier Boy’ll blast her, and we can all go home confident in your little gambit.”
You hesitated, trying to imagine the last political rally you’d seen. Group of people in tight groups, electrical wiring for microphones, speakers, and lights. Gates and closed doors, hallways leading out onto streets. “How are we going to isolate her?”
“Me and Butcher will work on that,” Annie said, almost reaching for you with a reassuring pat, but thinking better and jerking her arm back. She opened her mouth, an apology certainly on her, but you raised your hand to cut her off.
“How long until we leave?” You asked. Maybe they’d say ‘three hours’ and you’d get to talk to someone who didn’t think swing music was sonically viable for a bit.
Hughie checked his watch. “Ten minutes ago.”
“Ago?” Your eyes widened.
He gave you a sheepish look. “We thought it would take less time to get you.” He turned to Soldier Boy. “Your suit’s in the van. I can bring it out-“
“I can change on the way.” Soldier Boy grumbled, ignoring Hughie’s start of sputtering protests. “Let’s get this over with.”
———-
Much to his annoyance, they had forgotten Ben’s shield, and nobody would let him change in the van. He tried several times, only to be met by a chorus of groans, shouting, and swearing. He had listened to their complaints only because she had started giving him a look he recognized as a flag for a storm of uncontrolled fire. No hot disgust or sparks of rage, only a cold and quiet, almost glassy-eyed stare. Her heart steady but her breathing too fucking controlled to be natural, measured so equally that it sounded mechanical. So, because he figured she would only become more bitchy to live with if she incinerated her alleged “friends”, Ben stopped trying to pull his shirt over his head.
Once he did, the van fell insufferably silent. The edged pleasantries and conversation he’d overheard during Butcher and his band of Assholes arrival had ceased save for tense questions and hushed conversations. Ben didn’t fail to notice all the spineless avoidance and careful words directed at them both. She, even after the foggy look faded, remained curled into a corner, trading small and toothless smiles with her team. More timid than he’d seen her before, almost like a scolded child as she looked around the van nervously. Her eyes watched the shadows as though Homelander himself might jump from them, the chew of her lip giving Ben a headache. The only words she spoke were a jab at Ben when he’d said something about political rallies post-election being fucking pathetic—giving him a lecture about American politics now heavily depending on something called “going viral”—only to fall silent once more after. Her team looked at her like a glass bomb, as if she was a delicate statue looming over their heads and not the vulgar, violent woman who slept down the hall from him. That woman infuriated him, testing his patience every time she opened her mouth, but this paranoid, skittish pussy of a girl was so much worse. So when the van halted and Butcher’s team began to filter out, he called her name. When she ignored him, he reached out and grabbed her arm.
“What the fuck!” She pulled herself out of his grip in a second, staring at him with anger. She glanced down at her arms, a look he didn’t understand crossing her face, before returning her attention to him. “Do not touch me.”
“I barely touched you,” he glowered, annoyance quickly flooding him. He had only brushed skin, with a light grip she had thrown off, there was no need to be so dramatic. “When I touch you for real, you’ll fucking know, Sunshine. And you’ll fucking beg for it. I needed to make you listen, you were fucking ignoring me.”
Her brows knit, and he heard the chew of her teeth on her tongue. “I’m not going to beg for anything, and I wasn’t ignoring you.”
“I said your name, and you kept fucking walking.”
“I didn’t hear you.” She snapped, but didn’t relent. “Speak up next time.”
She knew just as well as Ben did that they were both far from quiet, pussy-voiced fuckers. And while he definitely hadn’t yelled for her attention, it shouldn’t have fucking mattered. He’d seen her pick up his grumbled insults and mocking comments just fine over the past two weeks. “Bitch.”
“What do you want?” She asked with a sigh, ignoring his jab and looking at him as if he exhausted her just by breathing. “We have to go, and you still need to change.”
“You shouldn’t let them treat you like that.” He said, not hiding the contempt from his voice. He wasn’t going to skirt around his thoughts, lining them gently to help her fucking feelings.
Her body tensed, her limbs looking as if they’d locked into place. “Like what?” Ben heard her swallow as she answered, her voice not lost enough to make her sound clueless to his words.
“Like you’re a child they have to coddle. A problem they have to deal with.”
She stared at him, her glassy-eyes returning. “Shut up. You don’t know what you’re fucking talking about, cunt-face.”
Ben snorted. “They don’t treat you like the bitch you are. They always use that sweet, pussy voice, like they’re talking to a fucking puppy, when they say something to you. They’re always all fucking pouty when they look at you, pussyfooting around so they don’t make you sad.” He gave her a mocking grin, hoping the next words landed like a bullet. “They treat you like me.”
It had clearly worked, as the van had grown hot, and her eyes were clearing as her heart began to pick up. Ben felt an odd feeling cover him as he heard it, almost familiar and sparking pride in his chest. She wasn’t a jittery shell anymore, she was going to try and kill him. It made his grin grow genuine, and the van grew only more heated, the air waving around them.
Her mouth opened, and Ben hoped whatever came out of it would be vile and crude.
“Hey!” She turned her head and clenched her jaw as someone called her name from outside, the van rattling as a fist banged against it. “We need to go!”
The door opened to reveal the Cocksucker, whose face grew quickly red, a bead of sweat falling from his hairline, as he was blasted with a quickly dying wave of heat.
“Sorry,” she mumbled, turning from Ben as the heat dropped further. “Coming.”
Cocksucker gave her a worried look, his gaze flying quickly to Ben, but just nodded and stood aside for her to move past.
As the door closed and Ben began to change, he listened for their soft, tense words.
“Are you okay? Did he do anything to you?” Cocksucker’s voice was nervous and gentle, like being suffocated by one of those fucking fluffy blankets Ben had seen in the empty bedroom of the safe house.
“No, he just grabbed me to talk. And you don’t have to keep asking me that. I’m fine, and it’s not as helpful as you think it is.” Ben frowned at her voice, the malice from it drained entirely in only a few seconds, replaced with only a tired hollowness.
“Grabbed you?! Like, he touched you?”
Having anticipated Cocksucker being more interested in the “talk” part of her sentence, or the shit that sounded like it was about feelings, Ben's brain rattled over Cocksucker’s word, his tone of panic looping in Ben’s head. He spoke of Ben’s touch as though it were a plague, and not something many people would kill to feel. Ben almost burst out of the van to say just that, but froze when he heard her answer.
“It was fast, I didn’t feel much. Even if I did, it doesn’t matter. I can’t go the rest of my life without touching people.” Her voice had a finality to it, and Ben could almost picture her downturned lips and wrinkled brow.
“You touch us when you heal us.” Even Cocksucker’s voice didn’t sound sure of his response.
“It’s not the same, and you know that.”
There was a momentary stall in their words, and Ben took the opportunity to emerge, securing his belt as he walked to the door. He wasn’t sure what he’d expected to see, but Cocksucker looking pathetically around, anywhere but the woman as she curved into herself, wasn’t it. She held a white-knuckle grip on the sleeves of her jacket, her thumb running up and down in small movements. They both turned to him as the door banged open, and Ben caught the empty look behind her eyes before her indifference slipped back into place.
“Did you hurry me just to sit around like pussies, or are we going to start fucking moving?” He asked, the air feeling too uncomfortable to sit in.
Cocksucker blinked, glancing at his watch. “We have a few minutes until they arrive, but I guess it can’t hurt to be vigilant-“
“Arrive?” The woman’s eyes widened, and Ben saw smoke curl from her hold on her jacket. “They’re coming here?”
Cocksucker nodded. “It’s a high-security escape exit-“
“It’s a fucking street, Hughie.”
“That’s used as a high-security escape exit.” After a moment of searching the area, Cocksucker pointed a few yards down, at a large door set against brick. “Neuman will come right out of there, and her guards will close her out here, where Soldier Boy will blast her.” He paused, glancing at Ben, before looking back at the door and taking small, cowardly steps away from his spot between them.
“It’s a public area, anyone could walk past! What the fuck were you thinking?!” Her voice was hushed and agitated, and Ben had never seen her face lose color at that speed before, had never heard her heart stutter and jump as if trying to escape her body.
“It’ll be fine,” Cocksucker’s voice wavered, giving them both a nervous look. “It should be fine. MM said it would be fine.”
“You heard him, Sunshine,” Ben gave her a wink, adding a half-cocked smile when she didn’t even return him with a dirty look. “MM said it would be fine. And have some fucking faith in me, I’m not a fucking monster. I won’t blast any running pussies except for this head-popper broad.”
“You don’t even know what she looks like.” Her tone wasn’t quite the vicious mockery he was used to, but it was better than the apathetic, empty voice she’d been using. She was rolling on the balls of her feet, speaking without looking at him, her eyes moving restlessly from the door to the end of the street. “And I don’t believe you.”
Ben just shrugged, allowing the silence to hang. The wind was picking up, whistling through the chill of winter air, making the heat around them, emitting from both Ben and the woman, all the more obvious. Despite the biting cold, Cocksucker had taken off his stupid puffy jacket, even stepping back further from where they stood, with Ben in the center of the street and the woman off to the left. Despite her slowly stepping further and further back, her back now almost against the wall, Ben could feel her watching him, hear her heart continue its new and erratic beat.
“How long now, Hughie?” Her voice was raised to carry over the wind, though it hadn’t lost that stupid fucking weakness. Cocksucker, thank fuck, didn’t get a chance to respond with pathetically comforting words, as only one skipping heartbeat after she spoke a shrill fire alarm sounded.
“I’m assuming that’s your stupid French fuck's plan?” Ben asked dryly. “Start a fucking fire? I thought you pussies were all about minimal damage.”
“He probably just pulled the alarm.” The Cocksucker’s answer lacked any confident assurance. “And I think we’re just against needless murder.”
Ben almost started to rant about their so-called needless murder being a mighty high horse for a group of people who had manipulated him just as much as Vought, who’d been willing to help him kill all those backstabbing pussies from Payback so he’d help them. About how their stupid fucking moral purity complex seemed to adjust perfectly to aid them, and maybe he wasn’t a fucking angel, but he was strong and powerful—something they fucking needed—man, and he wasn’t a pussyfaced liar about what he was, what he did. The words died on his tongue, though, as hundreds of frenzied footsteps reached his ears.
“Fuck!” he growled, turning around and pointing at Cocksucker. “You fucking pussy.”
Cocksucker gave him an idiotically confused stare. “Dude, uncalled for.”
“She,” Ben pointed to the woman, whose heart was beating impossibly fast and looking on with a bloodless face. “Was fucking right. This is a stupid plan, because unless your head-popper walks like a human centipede, it’s not going to be just her that I fucking hit when that door opens.”
Cocksucker only gaped at him like a fish as the footsteps grew louder, annoyingly unsure stutters  escaping him, and just as Ben decided it might be good to slap the idiot out of his daze, the woman stepped forward.
“We need to move, Hughie. Now.” Her voice wasn’t steady, her whole body was tensed and hyper, but it held a determination Ben almost admired. “We can’t be here.”
“He- he could be fucking lying, or wrong-“
“That’s not a risk we can afford to take.” She cut off Cocksucker’s doubts, and Ben found himself surprised at her defense of him, even if it could barely be called that. Her hands were smoking once more, but she had firmly planted herself in the middle of the road, eyes turning sharply to Ben. “If people see you, any element of surprise over Homelander would be lost. We need to fucking move, you need to get in the fucking van now-“
The door banged open, and the streets flooded as hoards of people in star and stripe-themed outfits flooded the road. Everything became so loud, and that rapt, snapping sound in Ben’s head started to spread through him, spurring the drum in his chest. They were finding rhythm so fast, everything fading as Ben tried to slow it. But there were screams and shouts, and everything was getting further and further away from him while carving into him all the same, so though Ben could hear the sounds of metal clanging and shouts of his supe name, he couldn’t think anything past the beat beat beat, until he lost it all at once.
As his vision grew clear with his head, Ben expected to see shattered bodies and bloody walls. Instead, all he saw was the woman and fire. Her face was flushed red, her eyes crazed, and her clothes had become charred with holes as the fire surged from her into a barrier, cutting them off from the crowd. Cocksucker was yelling her name, urging them both to return to the van and leave, but as Ben moved, he glanced back to see the woman frozen and heard her heart as if it were his own. The wall was growing wider and shooting high, Cocksucker wouldn’t shut the fuck up about moving, but her eyes had squeezed shut, unresponsive to anything but the growing flames.
“We need to fucking go, now!” Ben turned to see a large man he vaguely recognized barreling down their side of the street, his face twisted in anger. Butcher, Starlight, a small woman he remembered fighting, and that French prick followed him, all loading into the van as the large man stopped beside Cocksucker.
“I told you he’d fucking blow it,” the man said, giving Ben a disgusted look, so flawlessly revolted Ben wouldn’t be surprised if he’d fucking practiced in the mirror.
“Hey, I didn’t fucking blow it, you pussy-“
“You said that Neuman would come out of here, that it would just be her!” Cocksucker, much to Ben’s shock, cut him with a high voice and a wave at the wall of fire. “That’s way more than just her! Is she even there?!”
“No,” the man said gruffly. “Neuman saw Butcher and figured out something was up. She’s long gone.”
“Fuck!” Cocksucker yelled, running a hand through his hair.
“Oi, we can go over how MM fucked up later,” Butcher leaned out from the van. “We need to go before she sends Homelander.”
“How I fucked up? You’re the one who disobeyed me and blew our cover-“
“What’s wrong with Madame Anomaly?” The French Prick appeared at Butcher's side.
Cocksucker glanced at the woman, calling her name before turning to the large man Butcher had called MM. “She absorbed Soldier Boy’s blast. I think it got her stuck.”
“We don’t have time for this. Get Soldier Boy in the van, I’ll take care of the Anomaly.” MM repeated the French Prick’s words, and Ben realized they were, for the first time, using the woman’s supe name.
“You heard him, Gov. Get in the bloody van.” Butcher’s words were clearly directed at Ben, but as he climbed into the van Ben saw Butcher’s attention locked on the woman.
MM had moved closer to the woman, a move Ben deemed more fucking stupid than brave. If she had “absorbed his blast,” as Cocksucker said, he wouldn’t recommend any non-supe be anywhere near her. MM seemed to realize this himself at the last possible second, taking a pathetic, stumbling step back with a pause. He and Cocksucker exchanged a look, something passing between them that Ben didn’t understand, before Cocksucker leaned down to grab a pebble from the road. Ben watched as he shakily shook out his arms, wound up, and tossed the pebble at the woman.
It was a terrible fucking idea, Ben didn’t have to be Einstein to know that, but the chain reaction that played out still managed to go worse than he might have guessed.
The woman whirled around, her eyes blazing, with a roar sounding from her chest. Fire shot from the wall directly at Cocksucker. In almost slow motion, Ben watched her face become painted with horror as she recognized her target, a different, fearful sound leaving her. She reached an arm out, her heart seeming to falter, and barely redirected the flames before they hit Cocksucker in the chest. The blaze just grazed Cocksucker’s arm, passed the van clear of anyone else, and hit the building with a boom.
The moment the bricks caught fire and the ground began to shake as the building crumbled, the woman's wall of fire fell. The woman herself remained upright, but only barely as MM shouted her name and she started to stumble to the van. Cocksucker was hauled in by Starlight and the French Prick, the former fussing over his burnt arm—Ben had seen worse at Herogasm and nobody whined about it—and Cocksucker waved her off. The woman pulled herself in, ignoring Butcher’s outstretched hand, and the door closed behind her. MM appeared in the driver’s seat, and as the engine started everyone fell into a heavy-breathed silence.
Through the ride, Ben watched the woman open and close her mouth a million times, returned to her fetal position in the corner but watching Cocksucker with a strained face. Her hands tapped against her still-smoking jacket, reaching out hesitantly before she pulled them back into herself. No words were spoken, not even the anxious whispers of the ride there. Ben felt relief as the van stopped, MM climbing out and opening the doors to reveal the exterior of the safe house, grateful for any excuse to leave these stupid, sniffing pussies to wallow in their failure.
MM led Ben and the woman to the doors, opened them by leaning oddly at the doorbell, and gestured for them to walk through. The man followed them in, shutting the doors behind him with a rough push.
“If we failed the test, I am not doing that fucking shit again.” Ben grumbled as MM turned around from the now-shut entrance.
“Butcher told me about the fucking mess you and him made in here.” MM ignored Ben entirely, speaking to the woman as if he wasn’t even there. “A team cleaned it up while you were gone, and Mallory will send more groceries tomorrow night. I saw a picture, it was fucking gross. I’m only doing it once, because I don’t want a new disease to develop in here. You’re an adult, you should take care of this place by your goddamn self.”
The woman looked at her feet, humming a small acknowledgment. She didn’t look up as she spoke. “Is Hughie going to be okay?”
MM sighed. “The kid will live. I’ll look at him when we get back.”
“I could help-“
MM cut her off with her name. “He’ll be fine. We’ll make sure of it.”
She gave another nervous hum, and Ben jumped in.
“Can you answer my fucking question-“
“We’ll let you know what our next steps are after we talk to Mallory and Singer. This wasn’t good, but it’s not the end of the damn world.” Once again, MM ignored Ben. It was starting to feel personal. Before Ben could push further, MM reached a hand out to rest on the woman’s shoulder, right over a hole in her sleeve. Her head shot up with her heart, but the panic in her seemed to evaporate just as soon as it appeared. Her name was gentle as MM spoke it, eyes locked with hers. “You didn’t fuck up. You did your job.” She nodded slowly. “It’ll be fine.” With those last words, he exited the building, leaving Ben and the woman in the hall.
“What’s his fucking problem?” Ben grunted, half directed at the woman, half to just say it.
She gave him a flat look. “You killed his family.” Before he could come up with a clever response, honest or dodging the annoying feeling of guilt forming in his throat, the woman turned from him and walked away.
———-
You were so tired. Your bones ached, oddly cold in a way you hadn’t felt in a while, your skin crawled with feverish chills, and when you closed your eyes, you could see the flames graze Hughie and the building turn to dust. As MM’s lingering calm he’d offered you faded, all you felt was tired. Worthless. A liability. You had fucked up, just as much as Soldier Boy. Maybe more so, because he had PTSD, even if he would deny being a “hung-up pussy”. He had lost control because he’d been tortured by Russians, you’d almost killed your friend and definitely destroyed a rec center because you’d been startled. You just wanted to sleep, to deal with the inevitable fight about groceries in the morning, running on more than quickly expiring adrenaline and caffeine pills stuck in your throat.
You made it to your room, changing into one of the pajama sets folded in your drawers, hoping someone mentioned that the allegedly fire-proof wardrobe you’d been given apparently wasn’t strong enough for the full force of your fire combined with Soldier Boy’s nuclear explosions. A shame, you’d liked the pants you’d chosen for the mission. You’d live without the jacket, though. You’d hardly pulled the shirt over your head when the door ripped open, a still suit-clad Soldier Boy standing at your door.
“What fucking happened to you?” His question was blunt and confusing as he entered your room, remaining near the door but over the threshold.
Your body was too heavy to fight with him right now. There was no tense prickling on the bridge of your nose, only the throbbing stab of a headache. “Go away, Soldier Boy.”
“All of you have a fucking thing. A weird, sad reason to whine around and pretend you’re better than me.” He didn’t budge, but rather leaned forward. “What’s yours.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
“You said I killed MM’s family. Butcher’s always pussying around about Homelander stealing his girl. Cocksucker mentioned something about that fast asshole doing something as well. I’m not sure what the French Prick bitches about, but I’m sure it’s something.”
“First of all, you did kill MM’s family.” You really don’t want to do this right now, but maybe he’ll give up and fuck off. A fruitless wish, a small part of you knows, but you have nothing left to push back with. “And Homelander didn’t ‘steal Butcher’s wife’, he raped her.”
“Right.” Soldier Boy watched you, his expression unreadable in the shadowy room. “Those are all fucking things. So tell me what yours is.”
“I don’t have one,” even as you speak the insistence, it sounded fake and hollow.
He takes another step forward. “Yes, you do. I saw how you froze, nobody without a thing locks up like that. I heard Cocksucker ask you if I ‘hurt you’. Just for the record, Sunshine, I may not be a Boy Scout, but I’m no fucking rapist.”
“You’ve tried to sleep with me thirty-three times.”
“And I’ll blow your mind when you realize how much you’d love it, no sooner. What’s your fucking thing.”
You stare at him, the intensity in his voice throwing you off. He’s insistent, comfortable in your room but standing at his full height, attention fixed entirely on you. That impression of dissection has returned—the feeling as if he’s trying to pick you apart for him to play with. “Why do you even care?”
“Because maybe if you tell me, I can kill what supe fucked up your pretty little head and you’ll be less of a bitch.”
You can’t stop the snort that escapes you. “What a selfish fucking cunt reason.”
He shrugged in something that could’ve been an agreement. “Maybe.” He falls silent, but doesn't leave.
You collapse to sit on the edge of your bed, staring ahead as you rub your temple. “Please just go.”
“No.”
You look at him, not caring if he sees the desperation in your eyes. “Can this not wait six hours for the morning?”
“No.”
“Do you know any words but no?” You mutter under your breath.
You didn’t miss his annoyed humph. “Oh, just fucking tell me.”
“No.” It was your turn to snap. Your exhaustion was becoming lined with bitter childishness, and you didn’t care enough to try and suppress your urge to sneer at him.
“Why not?”
“Because you’re an idiotic, self-absorbed, sadist asshat who wouldn’t know empathy if it started sucking his dick.” You mocked.
He grinned. “Ok, now name my bad qualities.”
“I’m not telling you.”
“I’ll start guessing,” he took another step forward, now almost directly before you. “Did that red-headed lesbian steal your puppy?
You frowned up at him. “Maeve was bisexual.”
“Did Noir take credit for a college project?” He ignored your comment, leaning down with a mocking smirk.
“Trust me, I got all my dues in college.”
“Did that gay-for-Jesus blond steal your boyfriend? Did the fast asshole that stole Cocksucker’s girl break up with you? Did water-boy eat your goldfish?”
“I’ve never met Ezekiel, A-Train actually murdered Hughie’s girlfriend, and The Deep famously doesn’t eat seafood, he fucks it. But by all means, keep going.”
Soldier Boy blinked. “He fucks it?”
“Yep. It’s gross.” You shrug. “Are you done?”
“Are you going to answer my question?”
You give a toothless smile. “Not until you get all your guesses out.”
“Oh?” There was unquestionable surprise in his voice at your relent, only making your fake cheer grow and your immature anger fully overtake you.
“I want you to feel like a real fucking asshole when I tell you.”
His face split open with a grin. “Well then, did the Twins kick you out of Herogasm? Did that bitch, Crimson Countess, overshadow your big debut? Did a Z-lister get more attention than you from the Vought pussies?”
You just raised your eyebrows, crossing your arms as Soldier Boy continued until the list of supes ran dry. As the last jeer left his mouth, he mirrored your face of cold amusement.
“Well?”
You leaned back, watching him closely as you spoke. “Homelander kidnapped me, kept me in a dungeon, raped me in an attempt to make more mini-Homelanders, and, after you returned, started experimenting on me to try and recreate the V used on you.”
A small shock rushed through you after you spoke. You hadn’t said any of that out loud, not fully, since you’d escaped. You danced around it with Butcher and his team, with Mallory and the CIA leaders, always picking and choosing parts to omit so nobody would look at you with pity and fear. It hadn’t worked, they did anyway, but there had still been control over it. Up until this moment, nobody had known why Homelander had done all those things to you. Everyone had seemed happy to chalk it up to him being a fucking psychopath, not anything deeper. Certainly not attempting to create a small army of additional Ryan Butchers. Small things were still yours, flashes of hunger and warped sounds remaining in your head, but everything else you had just told him.
Why did you do that? A voice hissed as the high from your petulance faded. Why did you let him win? Why did you give him a weapon to use that could hurt you?
But looking at him, he didn’t appear to be a portait of self-satisfaction and heartless triumph. He was staring at you, scanning you as though the scars Homelander left would be visible on your bare legs and arms. When he spoke, his voice wasn’t weak or coddling, but angry.
“He kept you locked up?”
You nod, part of you getting ready to fight him over something.
“He hurt you? To try and recreate me?” Your repeated nodding only seemed to inflate whatever was happening. “Did it hurt?”
Your arms and face started at that, an uncertain feeling spreading through you. There had been no reverent tone as Soldier Boy had asked the last question, no sadistic for affirmation. But you didn’t know what he wanted to hear. Why he even wanted to know. But an involuntarily honest answer escaped you. “Yes.”
He stared at you for another second before he opened his mouth, only to close it without making any sound. Abruptly, he whipped around and began to leave, giving you only one more indecipherable look as he closed the door behind him, leaving you on the edge of your bed, alone in your room.
You lay down slowly, half expecting him to storm back in at any moment, but minutes passed, quickly turning into a half hour, and your body sat at the edge of collapse once more. Soon it was unbearable, and you lay down, your racing mind being forced to a halt as sleep pulled you under.
Your sleep, as had been the case for a while now, was haunted by nightmares of blue eyes and yellow, fluorescent lights. You woke up in a cold sweat, and took a long, needlessly warm shower before forcing yourself to leave your room around 9:30. Despite your lingering fatigue, no part of you wasn’t restless as you walked down the stairs. Your body tense and ready to run, your head spinning with hypotheticals and lining up words you may need—that feeling under your skin creeping up your spine and fluttering in your gut. But Soldier Boy wasn’t in the living room or the hall. You poked your head in the dining room, hoping to avoid the minefield of the kitchen, but it was empty, the plastic chandelier lights off, the table occupied only by a vase of wilted flowers. You moved to the kitchen, ringing growing in your ears, but he wasn’t there. You turned to walk away, continue your search, but double-back as it hit you.
Nothing was in the kitchen. It was empty. Of Soldier Boy, and of the groceries MM said would be delivered.
You wandered in slowly, watching the counters as if they might start to glitch and flicker, revealing hidden produce and dirty dishes. But, leaning over the sink, there was a single plate, soaking in water that was dotted with crumbs. Slowly, you moved to the refrigerator, slowly opening it as you glanced around the room. Your eyes widened at the sight inside. Milk, drinks, and produce had been placed inside, disorganized and haphazardly. There was a jar of mayonnaise in the fresh drawer, along with a box of pasta on a side shelf, but the fridge was full. You moved quickly to the pantry, which had been sorted in a similar fashion, but filled. And when you opened the last cabinet, you saw a piece of paper stuck under a jar of peanut butter.
I know I did a shit job. Clean up if it bothers you, but don't bitch to me about it. And tell Mallory to get smooth peanut butter next time, or I’m not doing anything for her but killing Homelander - Ben
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callme-holly · 9 months ago
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Hii!! I love your blog <3 Can I request a Johnny Cade x fem!reader who’s a soc but is really nice to him and the gang? I prefer if they met in school!
"𝐈 đ­đĄđąđ§đ€ 𝐈 𝐩𝐚đČ đ„đšđŻđž đČ𝐹𝐼
" [𝐣𝐹𝐡𝐧𝐧đČ 𝐜𝐚𝐝𝐞 đ± 𝐬𝐹𝐜!đ«đžđšđđžđ«]
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đšđźđ­đĄđšđ«'𝐬 𝐧𝐹𝐭𝐞 - not entirely sure how I feel about this... it's a little all over the place and I apologise for that but, hey, I tried. I might revisit it in the future and edit it. Not proof-read!!
đ°đšđ«đ 𝐜𝐹𝐼𝐧𝐭 - 2.1k words
đ°đšđ«đ§đąđ§đ đŹ - mild swearing, Dally being Dally, and Johnny Cade being a total sweetheart <33
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You were the last person Johnny Cade expected to find himself falling for. 
You were everything that he wasn’t; gentle, pure, honest. You stuck to the right side of the tracks, never looking for any sort of trouble or conflict, content with what you knew was right and proper. You had money and a place to call home,  parents who cared for you, and, most importantly, you had your whole life laid out in front of you on a silver platter. You were everything Dally had instructed Johnny to avoid in a girl, telling him that he'd only wind up getting hurt if he associated himself with you. 
“You'd be better off without her, man,” Dally had warned, a cigarette between his lips as he fumbled with his lighter. “Girls like that only want one thing and once they’ve got it, they kick ya to the curb and leave ya to the dogs.” 
Johnny frowned, breaking his gaze away from where he had been watching you instead of the movie being projected onto the screen in front of him. The way you smiled and the way your head tipped back when you laughed... it was all so perfect to him. It seemed impossible that someone like you would do such a thing, and Johnny told his buddy just that. 
Dally had laughed at him, earning a few harsh glares from the people sitting around them. 
“She's a soc, Johnny,” Dally said, voice quieting down as he took a drag from his cigarette. “She doesn’t give a shit about anyone but herself.” 
“Yeah,” Johnny mumbled, picking absently at his nails. “You're probably right
”
Dallas scoffed. “Probably? I am right, man,” He nodded to the movie, kicking his feet up on the chair in front of him. “Now, eyes on the screen. I didn't sneak you in here for you to just stare at some broad. You fall for her, you’re gonna get your feelings hurt.” 
But it was already too late, and Johnny couldn't take his eyes off of you as you moved past him in the halls to get to your locker. You looked perfect and he was so transfixed by you that he hardly noticed the group of socs approaching him until one of them grabbed a hold of his shoulder, their grasp a little harder than was probably necessary. 
The touch was enough to make Johnny jump, and his attention was quickly drawn away from you and to the boys surrounding him. 
“You got a staring problem, grease?” One of them asked gruffly, his face twisted into an unpleasant scowl. Johnny recognized him as one of the boys who had given Dally a rough time a little while back; apparently he still hadn't learned his lesson. 
He shook his head, eyes flicking down to his beat up converse. “Nah,” he murmured quietly, shifting uneasily from foot to foot as the boys loomed over him, circling him the same way a group of vultures would a dying animal.  They looked as though they could rip him apart, tear him limb from limb right in front of the entire school, not caring who saw them or what consequences they would face, if any at all. 
Johnny shivered, suddenly feeling very cold and very out of place. He stood up a little straighter. “I’m good, really.” He looked anywhere but them. “No problem here
” 
The boys snickered. The one holding his arm tightened his grip even more, leaning closer to him. “If there's no problem then why are you staring at my girl, huh?” 
Johnny froze. “Y-your girl?”
“Yep,” The guy smirked, his teeth bared in a grin that was anything but friendly and Johnny wanted nothing more than to turn and flee.  
Footsteps caught his attention, a new sound to add to the din of the hall, and he lifted his head up, expecting to see another soc ready to give him hell
 But, what he found instead was you, a frown gracing your features, hands placed firmly on your hips. 
“Let him go.” 
Your tone left no room for arguments and the boys all paused, sharing glances between them, before the first one released Johnny, sending the dark-haired greaser stumbling backwards with an unceremonious shove and a look of pure disgust. 
Johnny stood frozen, watching you carefully as you stalked towards him. The boys made way for you easily, stepping aside with a mocking bow of respect before walking away, casting wary glances towards you as you neared. 
The dark haired boy swallowed, trying hard not to shrink beneath your gaze. It felt wrong for someone like you to be standing up for someone like him, and he hated that he was somehow deserving of your kindness. 
“You okay?” Your soft concern broke through the haze of fear that clouded his mind, making his shoulders sag in relief.
He nodded slowly, heart thudding in his chest as your gaze softened a little more. The way your brow crinkled as you watched him only served to remind him how gone he truly was for you. God, what was he thinking? A pretty girl like you wouldn't dare look twice at some scrawny, no good greaser like himself. 
Your hand reached out and he barely registered you touching him before he jumped again at the sudden contact, causing you to recoil almost instantly, your arm dropping to your side. Your eyes widened in surprise, and Johnny tried not to wince at the sight. 
“Sorry,” You mumbled, turning away and shuffling your feet nervously. “I-”
“No, no.” He quickly interjected, trying desperately to salvage whatever small amount of dignity he might have left. “It's fine... ya just startled me
” He trailed off, unable to continue on after his blunder. The words sounded lame, even to his own ears, and he felt his cheeks flush red in embarrassment. He was making himself look like a complete fool in front of you, and he hoped beyond hope that he hadn’t scared you off. 
You bit your lip, nodding silently. 
“You sure?” You asked tentatively, and Johnny gave you a smile despite his best efforts.
“Yeah, man, don't worry 'bout it.” 
Silence stretched between the two of you, and Johnny was almost afraid to speak in case he said something wrong, something stupid. You were beautiful, but what was he supposed to say to someone like you? He didn't know how to interact with you. Hell, he was fairly certain you didn't even know his name. How pathetic was that? 
He let out a breath he hadn't realised he had been holding, looking down at his shoes once more, finally opening his mouth to say something, anything, however, you beat him to it. 
“You hang around with Dallas Winston, don’t you?” 
Johnny gave a slow nod in response, unsure on what Dally had to do with all of this. Had he said something to you? God, please say he hadn’t told you anything
 
You let out a small hum, glancing down at your own shoes and then back up. “You don't seem like the type to hang out with guys like him. You're too nice.”
Johnny blinked. “Nice?” He chuckled under his breath, shaking his head slightly. “You don't even know me... For all you know, I might be as bad as Dally.” 
You laughed softly. “Maybe, maybe not.” Your expression grew more serious as you spoke, eyes locked on his. “But something tells me there’s more to you than people make out.” 
Johnny stared blankly at you, not really knowing what to say in response. There didn't seem to be any malicious intent behind your words and the softness with which you said it filled him with a strange sense of comfort. He wondered briefly if you were making fun of him, mocking him for his background, besides, you were you. You had no right to be talking to someone like Johnny Cade. He was practically a nobody in the grand scheme of things; he couldn't possibly compare to the other Socs in terms of looks. He wasn't rich, or popular... he was just... plain old Johnny.
And yet you were still standing up for him

Before he could dwell on it any longer, the bell rang overhead, cutting the tension between the both of you short, and you glanced upwards, catching Johnny’s eye once more.
“I should go
” Your tone was hesitant, and he nodded once more, biting his lower lip.
“Right..”
For a moment, you just looked at each other, and he wondered whether he'd ever get the chance to talk to you again. Would you even spare him the time of day after this? Probably not.
He watched as you turned on your heel, starting back towards your locker before abruptly stopping and spinning around once more.
“I'll see you around, Johnny Cade.” And with one final smile in his direction, you were gone, swept up into the crowd of rowdy high schoolers that flooded the halls, leaving Johnny alone. 
The greaser stood stock still, breath caught in his throat, as a small tentative smile crept its way onto his face. 
She knew his name... 
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After that first encounter, it became near impossible for you to avoid Johnny Cade. 
It seemed that wherever you went, he was there too, and before you knew it, the pair of you had formed what could only be described as a sort of strange friendship. He always managed to find you, no matter the place, and when he needed to escape from his family for a little while, he found himself going to you. You didn’t mind, of course, in fact, you quite enjoyed being around him. He was calm, grounded, respectful; you appreciated that about him as much as anything else. He seemed to open up to you too. He would go on for hours about his friends and how he loved them more than his real family, how his parents seemed to never stop arguing, and how the Socs treated him inside and outside of school. He confided in you about his problems, sometimes crying, sometimes getting so angry that you were forced to hold him close until he calmed down, whispering soft words of reassurance to him as he sobbed into your shoulder. 
He trusted you, not because you were kind and gentle, but because he could tell by your eyes that you genuinely cared for him and that scared him. What could you possibly see in someone like him? Was he even worth anyone's affection? Why did you waste your time worrying about him and wanting to help him? How could anyone care about someone so worthless?
The first person he had mentioned you to was Ponyboy. He had told him everything once night at the lot  and, although he had tried, his friend was unable to hide the surprise written across his face.
“Wait, so all those times you've been missing from group hangouts... are they all because you've been with her?”
Johnny nodded curtly, refusing to meet Pony's gaze. “I really like her,” he confessed quietly, “She makes me, I dunno, happy.” 
And it was then that Ponyboy Curtis knew that you may not be as bad as he’d thought. He wasn't blind. Johnny had looked happier these past few weeks, smiling more often and laughing more loudly. He didn't miss the look on the greaser’s face as you walked by, didn't miss the way his eyes light up and his lips quirk up into a smile. He was in love with you and Ponyboy  was going to everything he could to convince Johnny to confess to you.
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A few weeks later, he had succeeded. It had taken a lot of work and a lot of coaxing on dear old Sodapop’s behalf, but he had finally managed to make Johnny ask you on a date. It had been awkward, and Johnny had almost backed out, but he found that it was worth every second for the smile that had graced your features when you'd finally agreed to go to the movies with him later that night. He could have cried on the spot, eyes sparkling with excitement as he smiled shyly at you. 
Needless to say, it had come as a major shock to everyone when Johnny had shown up at the Curtis' doorstep one Sunday evening, your finger linked with his, looking every bit like an excited puppy. 
They were wary of you as you introduced yourself, Dally glaring daggers at you from his spot on the floor, but Johnny didn't seem to notice, dragging you over to the couch to sit with him. The gang had never seen their friend so content, so utterly relaxed as he was now, and as you struck up conversation with Steve and Two-bit they couldn’t help but soften a little towards you. Sure, you were a soc, someone who they never thought would end up sitting on the Curtis' couch, holding hands with Johnny Cade, but if  he was happy, well, they weren't exactly complaining. 
Besides, what's one more member to their little dysfunctional family? 
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shaisuki · 1 year ago
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Hiiiii it's the anon who sent the anon message about reading your Itoshi Rin smuts before falling asleep HAHA! After revisiting your blog, u have no idea how bIG my eyes went when you posted a reply, especially when I kept brainstorming ideas (smut most of the time) on what I should request from you! ;;; "Should it be Omegaverse dynamic with Alpha!Rin? How about a wholesome moment that can lead to smut or something yandere where Rin discovers that he has feelings for chubby!fem?? What about an Owl shapeshifter! Rin where chubby gurl had to take care of him when she saw Owl!Rin in bad shape?? What about Rin reluctantly playing a dating simulator because of Bachira's dare and soon falling in love with a character who is chubby!fem (this one is inspired when I was playing BlueLock world champion but it's not an otome game-- but hey! I help mah husband get better at soccer <3) There are so many things... That's why I only mentioned 4... You can pick from any of them if you'd like :DD
A CLAIM FOR NEED
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ALPHA! ITOSHI RIN X OMEGA! CHUBBY READER
content warnings ─── omegaverse, alpha! rin, omega reader pretending to be a beta, mating, marking, knotting, rutting, noncon/duncon, breeding, sabotage, dacryphilia, marking, scenting, cunnilingus, stalking, inaccurate details about omegaverse. do forgive me, it's my first time writing.
notes. i'll call you rin anon. i'll gladly write your ideas nonnie. you're a fucking genius and this ideas are simply superb and i had a hard time choosing all of your ideas and my inbox and messages are always open for you nonnie. i hope i did this one justice T_T.
ᝰ synopsis .ᐟ hiding your status as an omega didn't escape from the heightened senses of the popular alpha in your school and with this, he has the right to claim you.
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“i don't know.”
“will she be okay?”
"society is unkind with the likes of hers."
it gets repetitive. how your mother worries about you. it's the same damned words like you were helpless. being born an omega you were doomed or more likely unfortunate. society is now crawling with alphas, who are the dominant and top of the hierarchy. betas who are in the middle with their average roles in society and omegas. the very bottom whose role is to serve and be submissive for their alphas and have their pups. you've grown to hate from what you're born in. a female omega, nonetheless. you could have been an alpha or a beta who lives in not so demanding roles for them.
growing up, you learn how to blend and to pretend to be a beta to protect yourself. dosing yourself with the right amount of heat suppressants. learn to act like one. not too demure or dominant at things. you've done anything just to avoid suspicions of being the lower of the crop. your mother insisting that this is the way you'll be safe until your rightful mate will claim you and to avoid being raped by an alpha who's in a rut. you don't want to be shamed and the latter regretting for fucking you.
aside from that, you don't look like the typical omega. while they have the lithe and smaller bodies, yours was softer and bigger than the typical omega. you were grateful for it. nobody had ever raised suspicions on you being a omega.
well, for the untrained ones and hasn't sharpened their instincts no one but for those who mastered and got their senses honed to detect, you were hopeless but it's the adults who are mated and you only get a raised brows from them and a nod understanding your situation.
except for one, itoshi rin.
your school's soccer superstar and an alpha. unlike any other students who are still exploring their traits, rin had developed his. too mature for his own good and too dominant. always have shown his superiority and exudes dominance in others without efforts. despite this and his growing popularity in school. rin is still an unmated alpha. the number of omegas surrounds him and hoped to be his mate but never approached him, not risking to be rejected. there's wooing and courting but he paid them no mind.
alphas like rin is the people you avoid. you had heard and met with accidents with omegas going to an early heat due to alphas emitting pheromones even it's unintentional and you don't want to end up like them even with your heat suppressants. you don't want to blow up your cover. it's the only way to make you safe.
interactions can't be avoided wether it's a brief passing in the hallways and or in the same room with rin, you felt uncomfortable. maybe you're too protected or not used to his domineering presence. it gives you the creeps and you don't want setting your heat early with alphas like rin surrounding you.
it wasn't hard to notice you. rin wasn't in a rush to mate or claim someone in his own desires. he's a rising superstar. he couldn't be bothered with such needs. an alpha like him could get everything he wants when he desired when he's in the top of his own career but there's always a rock in his way and it's you. from the day he first met you, he knew you were hiding something from these society. you were an omega pretending to be a beta. it's unheard of but it's possible. you were the proof it and everyone's stupid for not noticing it.
pretend all you want but it didn't escape him your alluring scent and the small habits omegas have. the frown etched in your face when you're surrounded or near the alphas or how you avoid the crowd. his keen sense of smell taking a whiff of your scent permeating in the air. undetected by others but to him it's always the first whenever you're near. warm honey being drizzled in freshly baked goods and it reminds of him of the happy times. rin had enough troubles but it wasn't bad to claim you. a omega pretending to be a beta. it would be interesting.
rin understands when wanting someone like you, it would be difficult. he tried his advances to you but it only backfires on him. you were too eluded. always avoiding him like his presence suffocates you. brief conversations and a nod when you avoid him just to pass suspicions from you being an omega but you could be careless at times. play dumb with him and he'll show you whose stupid for refusing him.
what simple would turn complicated when rin and his alpha inside him screams for you. needed you. not wanting to scare you from him and to claim you. mark you as his and be his mate forever. you will give him strong, healthy pups with that soft, plump body of yours. ready to be bred and marked by him.
rin had known your certain habits on blending with everyone and that little secret of pretending someone you're not. oh, it would bear fruit from his hard labors from getting you out of that made up status of yours. why would you pretend someone you're not. Is it the fear of being deemed as useless? proving that you can be independent? rin could give you that. he'll use you until you fully submit to him. freedom? he can't do nothing much from that when you'll be his. he will give you all the love and pampering that any omega can have. he will make sure of it.
then rin started to create his own ways to get you. far as getting from stealing your heat suppressants. getting your medical records in the nurse's office. memorizing your heat cycles and the subtle release of pheromones to get you in heat. he knows by doing this it will be a way to get you closer to him and make your omega need him. it's almost there, he needed to be patient.
you got used to the idea of being a beta that you forgot to be an omega sometimes. years of mastery with the intention of self-preservation was always on your mind. wanting a life of your own choice and not run by the instinct from the traits you were born in. perhaps you're one in a million. seen the cruelness and unfairness the society have to offer for someone like you.
looking at the nearly empty seats in the classrooms with a few students gearing up to go home. you decided it was time for you. cleaning the clutters in your desk and putting your chair after getting your bag then you went to replace your shoes placing your indoor shoes inside the shoe locker and began to go home. passing in the football field and that's when you began to notice the changes in your body. you had been going back and forth in the restrooms for today and getting a little moodier than the usual. it's a sign that you're going into heat in the next days and the heat suppressants you were taking lately seemed to taste a little different? you shrugged it off. this isn't the first time it happened to you and you were kind of glad. you still have the time to formulate what kind of excuses to make for your absences due to your heat. you should go home now, noticing the sun going down for the moon to show. you began to walk away.
upon walking you notice someone else is going towards your way. it's just a student going back for something they forgot and upon closer look and the scent of him, you recognized it was itoshi rin. you tried not to flinch and dread settled in your stomach. you don't want to be around him, not with the telltale signs of your incoming heat and risking of finding out that you were pretending. you could almost let out a sigh of relief before a voice called you.
"i think you forgot something." his voice echoing in the quietness of the place. turning around, your eyes widens. rin stands there in his lax posture, holding out a bottle of your supposedly heat suppressants. you swallowed the lump in your throat and composing yourself in front of him. feigning innocence and what he was implying at you.
"it's not mine and i don't take those." you calmly stated. looking at the bottle of pills in his hands and to his face. he doesn't show any emotions. examining the bottle in his grasp. "oh, really?" he asks you in a neutral voice. his words next doesn't prepare you from the chills creeping up in your spine.
"you're not a beta, are you? i'm sure of it." his teal eyes getting cloudy at his accusations at you. the words got stuck in your throat. you can only shake your head at him and you were a bit angry at him for making such accusations at you when it's true and you have your own decision for this one.
"you can fool everyone but not to me. an omega like you pretending to be a beta, how foolish." there's a condescending tone in his voice like it was foolish to pretend and it stung. easy for him to say that. he was born an alpha. he didn't had to go through difficulties like you had.
rin could smell the sudden change in your scent. it's smells something burnt. he may have upset you and he can see you chewing your lips.
your shoulders shakes. he doesn't have the right to tell you that. "yeah. i'm pretending to be one. so what? it's none of your business." you snapped at him. angry and frustrated at the world for being born an omega. "i have my reasons and if that bothers you that much, leave me..."
the words dies at their own. suddenly you can't continue. the world starts to spin and you were feeling lightheaded. your heart rate spiking up and you caught the scent of pheromones in full blast. the earthy tones of his scent invading your senses and you can't help the need to submit to him but you fought the urge to do so. with the last of your remaining senses and not your omega controlling your feelings you ran away from him.
after that you made sure you were far from him. there were tears of frustration rolling in your cheeks. all of your pretend, your hard work crumbling for that one confrontation. the streets were empty. kamakura wasn't a populous place in the first place and only known for tourists spot's. looking around, you were alone which is good. leaving you with a problem of your own. itoshi rin, the school's superstar knows your secret. he won't be that cruel to tell the world that you're a omega pretending to be a beta, right?
you were broke out in your thoughts when you feel the all too familiar cramp in your stomach. you though you couldn't breath, followed by a warm gush of slick between your legs and you were delirious.
no. no. no. no.
this couldn't be happening. no fucking way. the stress and rin blasting his pheromones at you must have triggered your heat. you couldn't do anything but to feel helpless.
stupid. stupid. stupid.
you were so angry at yourself for being an omega, for being you. how could you handle your heat alone when you're from home and you don't want to walk in the streets with you on heat. think. you need to think. remembering that there is safety rooms for when omegas set their heat on early until it passes out.
rin watched as you ran away from him. he could really give the effect he have on you. what you sow is what you reap and rin could finally get you. the confrontation that just happened and your heat coming early from him emitting his scent and how you're body reacted from it. you are to be his mate and no one could say so from it.
with your heat triggering, it doesn't take too long to trigger his. allowing him to sync with your heat and his rut, with that he's rightfully your mate. all it needs is to find and knot and claim you.
following you with the trail of your scent in the air. rin found you distressed and on the verge of tears. such a sight to behold. your toughness and made-up personality slowly crumbling for your heat to take over. it made him drool, wiping and he can feel the familiar tightness of his pants and the snarl in his lips. the desire burning in his insides.
the air in your lungs leaves you as you topple and your back hitting the hard tile of one of the rooms designated for omegas who got their early heat. your mind in a haze as you got pinned down and the scent of an alpha belonging to rin. from the way his eyes are wide and dilated and the indescribable strength he have. he's in a rut. that frightens you, you don't want this.
all of your life being an omega isn't something you can describe as pleasant even your mother who is one can say the same thing. you were conceived early, crushing your mother's dream. you don't want suffering in the same fate as hers.
it's instinct they say, for alphas and omegas to mate but with the likes of rin, it's a form of mockery. it's a way of saying you don't have a freedom for yourself to choose. the thought bringing tears to your eyes. you don't want this and a form of rebellion of this life who had nothing but to loathe the likes of you, you rejected him.
"i don't want you."
rin halts his movements. surprised at the words coming from your mouth. rejecting him. you're a stubborn one and he thought omegas are submissive. you're the flawed one in the system or it's the effects of the heat suppressants and the mindset of being a beta for too long.
"brave of you to deny me but i can knock some sense in you or would you like me to knock you up, huh? knock you up with my pups and be a good omega of mine."
he can sense another shift in you. your scent getting sweeter and your squirming lessening. it's like you were slowly entering in subspace. your omega instincts kicking in against your own will. you're an interesting one and rin loves that. it would be easier for him to mark you. always had been his desire. the sudden change bringing pride to him and his alpha getting territorial by the minute. you were ready.
"you want that, 'mega? want to carry my pups?"
he taunts and he didn't give you a word to reply, only to crash his lips into yours. the aggressive muscle of his mouth clashing into yours. claiming the insides of your mouth and swirling it inside and with your instincts, you returned it with such fervor. drool escaping in the corners of your mouths. it was the sloppy, wet and aggressive kind of kiss that reflects the desire.
what once holding your wrists now wanders in the expanse of your body and it finds in the home of your uniform's buttons before it was ripped. the sound of your clothing being teared resonating in the place.
a string of saliva connecting on both of your lips when rin broke the kiss. too impatient and greedy. sweat beading in his forehead. pants too tight to be comfortable and fuck, your scent is intoxicating.
you're helpless under him. too dizzy to function and you can't help but to think this will be the end of your days as free.
"please, no." there is that voice in yours that still surfaces despite your raging hormones. the want not to succumb in being mated. you valued being free than anything.
this seems to anger rin. his aggression heightening towards you and from your words. why the hell did you not want to be mated when you two are destined and had this unbreakable bond of being mates. he believed in that for too long. to know the differences between love and just a simple logic of instincts.
he cups your jaw in his hand. squishing the flesh with his fangs baring. snarling and seething with anger from your refusal. is it that hard or you were too corrupted in your thinking.
"why must you deny me? you're mine from the moment i set my eyes on you!" his voice furious and you can't help but to wince. the tears freely rolls in your cheeks.
this affected rin, seeing how hurt and distressed you are from being forced by him. he can't help it. why you must hurt him too. you were his. can you just accept that? it would be easier for him and to you. he'll be good to you.
although frustrated at your defiance at him, he instinctively scents you. let his scent calm you. it takes effect when your tears are nothing but streaks. engulfed in the scent of him with the aroma of something primal and crisp.
it eases rin when you've calmed down a bit. alphas are know to have to little or no self-restraint at all but rin is different. trained himself to have control when it comes to time where he'll be mated to his rightful mate. a contrast to what he did to you.
you were his. it always was. they say alphas are drawn to what what their mates smells like and it came to a surprise to him when a beta like you possessing such qualities a omega have and thus born his suspicions and the confirmation bringing an edge to it. it's also whenever you're near, he's content and fulfilled. you were his destined mate. the piece of the missing part of his puzzle. it was his right to claim you no matter what your reasons are.
you were calm. dangerously calm. your fears and worries fading as you inhale to the scent of his. your heart fluttering and you can't help but to look at him. intense and stoically handsome. the lines in his faces defined. this was your alpha. who claims you to be his and yet, this will be the time you will finally succumb to your desires. this was nature.
"alpha..."
mewling at him and rin could feel the surge of pride bubbling in his chest. his sweet omega calling out to him. your hands raising in attempt of reaching out to him. your eyes lidded and pleading for him. this is the real of you. no more pretending, no hiding from him.
rin holds your wrists and like any other alpha would do their omega. he brought it to his lips, nuzzling into the scent gland in your wrists and you squirmed. there's a hiccup followed by your thighs rubbing each other.
he can smell the sweet arousal dripping out from your cunt. he couldn't wait to get a taste out of it.
his lovely omega. kissing your wrists and your arms before leaning down to kiss you. his lips moving to your mouth, then to your jaw and the scent gland in your neck where he can smell you. the sweet scent tickling his nose making his nostrils flare. inhaling the scent his omega is emitting before taking a huge lick out of it. the action sending tremors in your body, making you mewl more for him.
your body on fire and more slick gushing out from you. you couldn't think anymore at this point or you're too tired to care. your efforts and hardwork of protecting yourself is nothing to him. could you accept it? a life with him? your body screams for him. it aches for him. your soul calls for him. can you deny it with your whole being screaming for him? is this what you really want?
perhaps the answer was there all along. presented in front of you but you're too absorbed in blending with the others. there's a voice in your head telling you, could you do it? you're still in the constant battle with yourself but with instinct and nature. you could barely much do so.
rin is the answer for all of this. he found out and now he's here. claiming you for his own. you couldn't stop him when he's already in between your legs. sniffing through your panties, soaked with your slick. your body jerks, a mewl slipping in your mouth and rin is pleased with your reaction.
sliding off your panties and his mouth waters at the sight. your fat pussy glistening in slick and arousal. the fleshy mound and the glistening folds of your puffy cunt bare in front and rin shivers when his tongue got the first taste of you. licking through your folds and the sweet taste of your cunt bouncing in his tongue. lapping up the newly slick coming out from your hole with such want. you taste damn good and it's expected for his omega.
"r-rin..." your voice trembles at the sensation of his tongue in your folds. your hips arching from the intrusion and your slick gushing like waterfalls. his tongue gliding to your hole and sucks into your clit that throbs and twitches at the attention given by him.
rin grips your wide hips while your pillowy thighs crushing his head and isn't bothered by it. engrossed of giving the utmost pleasure to his omega that will leave you wanting for more. he rips a deep moan from you when his tongue prods at your aching hole and it spurs him more. he needs more and so he licks it, wiggles his tongue and with a scream you came into his tongue but it doesn't stop him. greedily lapping at your sweet essence until you were quenched of relief for awhile.
licking his lips, rin discarded his uniform. throwing it at the side. his cock aching with the intention of pumping you full of his cum and bearing his pups. there's nothing than fulfilling to see you full and swollen.
hungry eyes gazes at you. rin thought nobody could ever look so vulnerable as you. body splayed in front of him. your slick coating your inner thighs and your chest heaves in every breath you take. lips swollen and there's a whine coming from you. begging for him to take you. what defiance earlier is nothing but a husk of your former self. this is what you truly are. a needy omega who have nothing but the desire to be taken care of by him and for the younger itoshi he's more than willing to do that as your alpha and your mate.
hovering above your quivering body, rin grabbed your hands. kissing them before leaning down to lick your tears. it was a distraction before slowly entering your quivering heat. rin growls at the sensation of his length being wrapped around you. your walls spasming around him. welcoming him with eagerness that leaves him no doubt that you were his.
it earns a whine from you, being stretched that it leaves you crying. your hymen breaks at the intrusion of his length but all you could do is take what you were given. followed by the protest leaving at your lips. the fear of being pregnant at this early stage of your life.
"rin, stop. w-what if i get pregnant?" you asked him but he only growls, feeling the tight heat of your pussy stretching around him.
"then so be it." he replied. grunting at the spasm of your walls accommodating him.
"i-i don't want to.."
"you will." he snarls when completely bottoms out at you. his knot at the base of his cock hitting your folds so sweetly that slick gathers at the hole of your clenching pussy at him.
"you're going to be a good 'mega and mate for me don't you?" raising your legs and hooking it up to his shoulders before snapping his hips at yours. his full length crashing at your insides with a desperate need with an intention to breed and procreate with you.
you were left with no protests, his full speed hitting you in such depths that you can only mewl and cry out for him. holding his shoulders while he buried himself deep inside. take and take. that's what you did. letting himself bruise you from how rough he is and drool starts to escape from the corners of your mouth.
seeing you cock drunk and eyes dazed from him breeding you and your heat in full blow. rin captures your mouth with his. the wet muscle of his mouth encircling your insides to claim territory while he basks in your scent. it wouldn't be too long before he marked you as his. claim you to be his and forever to be yours.
his chest rubbing into your breasts while he got you pressed in his body. he can feel the very bits of your soft tummy jiggling upon the impact of his hips. it feels so divine to be this close to you. your flesh in his rock hard abs. he can't wait to see you growing with his pups.
rin swallows your moans, that's a good mate for him. you were truly bonded with him and his chest swells with pride. all his plans coming into bearing in such fruition. this is what you are to him.
breaking the kiss to lick the scent glands in your neck, such actions leaves your body into sensitivity. you can feel everything around him. his scent, his length shaping your hole in his, his breathy moans and the growl he keeps emitting. everything felt so right about him. you were in no state lucid as you keep thinking about him. you crave everything about him but at this moment you want nothing but his knot to fill you up. have his babies and be a good mate for him.
with rin's animalistic thrusts of your abused hole. it doesn't take too long before you creamed around him. "alpha..." you call out to him. your legs trembling around him and your supple thighs ripples at your orgasm.
rin instinctively pushed his knot around you when your orgasm came. locking it tight around your hole with no chance of his healthy semen seeping every crevice of your pussy and to your cervix. ensuring fertility of your future pups with him. spurts after spurts of his cum endlessly releasing inside of you and you willingly took it. locking your legs around his hips in which both of you moaned out.
"you're my sweet 'mega, aren't you?"
nuzzling at your neck before he bites it. there's a tremble and a gasp. you were finally his. you were tied to him, forever and it brings out such joy in rin's heart. having you to be by his side forever. no walks about stupid dreams and wants you have. you will only think of him and only him.
"yours, alpha." you moaned out.
and in a series of wants and needs, you are nothing but his omega and sweet mate.
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allwaswell16 · 14 days ago
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I'm so sorry, but for the first time in 5 years, I just don't have it in me to do an episode of Fanfictional this month. If possible, I'll be back with a new episode next month. But I do want to acknowledge the wonderful One Direction fics I read this month as well as some I revisited for comfort. Thank you so much to these amazing fic writers who have entertained me or given me some respite. For more new fics, check out this month's fic roundup here
- Louis / Harry -
🧡 Stand on Holy Ground (series) by @wishingforloushair
(E, 17k, religion kink) Louis comes back to confess again, and Harry has an idea of how Louis can show God his devotion. 
🧡 My Spiteful Ballerina by sweetkalachuchi / @neverforpickles
(M, 7k, omegaverse) Four times Harry wanted an explanation of Louis' hatred toward him, and one time Louis gives in, in Louis' fashion.
🧡 Die Without the Taste of You by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28
(E, 6k, part 2 of Vampire Harry/Human Louis One Shots) the one where human Louis might push his vampire boyfriend a little too far, but it works out in the end
🧡 Ain't a Drop of Bad Blood by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28
(E, 4k, part 3 of Vampire Harry/Human Louis One Shots) the one where human Louis is being haunted by a spirit, and he's reluctant to ask his vampire boyfriend for help
🧡 Alone and Back Again by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup
(T, 4k, omegaverse) what does one do when a feral alpha shows up in town ready to be executed?
🧡 The Shadow by babyhoneyhslt / @babyhoneyheslt
(G, 666 words, dark Louis) Harry should've listened. He should've stayed inside.
- Rare Pairs -
🧡 That's Happiness To Me by @louislittletomlintum
(E, 24k, Zayn/Louis/Liam) Louis’ mind was whirring. He’d wanted to try and get with Liam tonight, but now a new, better idea was forming. Getting Liam with Zayn, if possible, would be something of a dream come true.
🧡 It’s a Craving Not a Crush by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28
(E, 9k, Liam/Louis) the one where Liam and Louis are best bros who end up getting married so that Liam has the insurance he needs to go to rehab. Now that he’s sober, they can get divorced. But do they want to?
🧡 I'm the Big Fish by @lululawrence
(NR, 5k, Louis/Pedro Pascal) After an awkward moment at a party he wasn't actually invited to, Louis keeps running into the incredibly attractive Pedro Pascal. Somehow, it's Pedro who manages to keep making a fool of himself
🧡 Spirits by itsraininginengland / @ilovellama14
(E, 4k, Louis/Oscar Isaac) Edwardian music hall performer Louis Tomlinson meets the newest act in the show, the American magician Oscar Isaac. Romance, smut and a seance ensue.
🧡 Ci Ci Leu by @persephoneflouwers
(M, 3k, Louis & His Band) Written for the prompt «bread van fic reimagined with all the guys in Louis’ band».
🧡 Glitz, Glammer, Top Hats, Cigars and Suits by @rockstarlwt28
(NR, 3k, Louis/Dominic Harrison (Yungblud) When Isla found a love for the melody formed by a strumming of strings, Louis didn't expect to fall equally in love with his daughter’s guitar teacher, Dominic Harrison.
🧡 I regret you all the time by @disgruntledkittenface
(E, 2k, Louis/Prince William) Louis’ friends don’t understand, and they wouldn’t even if he explained. But every time William texts, Louis drops everything to go see him.
- For Comfort -
🧡 You're Not My Type (still I fall) by Imogenlee / @imogenleewriter
(M, 38k, omegaverse) This is just a bit of rain; it'll blow over. Then Harry will just... well, alright, he isn't entirely sure what to do when the rain stops because he'll still be stuck and lost. 
🧡  The Journal by 4ureyesonly28 / @evilovesyou, RecycledStardust / @wait4ever
(G, 14k, soulmates au) When Harry finds himself purchasing an antique journal in the ancient bookshop of a town he’s never heard of, he doesn’t exactly want to admit that he has no idea how he got there.
🧡 Just Your Jinx by @larryatendoftheday
(T, 10k, witch au) Harry Styles may or may not have accidentally jinxed his extremely fit new neighbor, and it's not so easy to make things right.
🧡 Court Wine by @enchantedlandcoffee , red_panda28 / @red-pandaaa
(T, 7k, omegaverse) after a misunderstanding during a scrabble game, Alpha Louis starts courting Omega Harry without the latter being aware of it.
🧡 Have Me And Hold Me by @letsjustsee
(NR, 5k, established relationship)  a wedding day AU in which Louis will let nothing stand in the way of a perfect day - especially a little rain.
🧡 Good-Old Fashioned Lover Boy by not_fitzwilliam / @not-fitzwilliam-darcy
(NR, 5k, omegaverse) When a miscalculated decision leads to an accidental courtship with the sweetest, most gentle alpha, Harry is torn between breaking the alpha's heart and telling the truth. 
🧡 Pretty and Preposterous by @brightlyharry
(NR, 5k, neighbors) Harry donates a copy of Pride and Prejudice to his little free library. He never expects what comes next.
🧡 Stealing Flowers by @lululawrence
(NR, 4k, meet cute) the one where Louis pines after the Sexy Stranger on the Subway and almost asks him out. That's when the strange posters start showing up around Brooklyn.
🧡 Choo-Choose Me by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13
(G, 3k, Liam/Louis) Liam is a commuter with a crush. Louis is the chirpy ticket inspector who occasionally mans the drinks trolley and sometimes makes announcements, his broad Yorkshire accent fighting the outdated train speakers.
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fandoms-writings · 1 year ago
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hii pretty girl, happy celebration! you deserve everyone who follows you <3 i’m here to request a few things for ur party! (i’ll space them out in asks hehe)
for the first one, may i pmease request a small little blurb with bucky and ‘keep your eyes on me’ from the smut category? it can be any bucky of yours, one dominating and possessive đŸ˜”â€đŸ’«
thanks baby! i almost got carried away with this one đŸ˜”â€đŸ’« i might have to revisit these two in the future - i hope you like it darlin <3
Pairing: DBF!Bucky x college!reader
Word Count: 680
Warnings: Smut 18+ ONLY, car sex, unprotected vaginal sex, oral (f receiving), fingering, slight exhibitionism
come celebrate with me! || part 2
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He knew you shouldn't be here - that this was wrong. 
He was your fathers best friend. But when he met you at your graduation party two years ago, he was enamored. You'd just finished your degree, getting ready to specialize at another university and after some conversation, he learned it would be the one in his city. 
He'd helped you move, helped you get settled in your apartment - which was only a ten minute drive from his house. He told you that if you ever needed anything, that he'd be there for you. 
He didn't necessarily mean it like this, but he'd gladly spend the rest of his days between your legs if it meant he didn't have to see you cry anymore. 
Sure, you muttered about how you two shouldn’t be doing this, asking what you were going to do if your father found out. Bucky assured you he wouldn't, what he was doing to you - ruining you - would be your little secret, and you let him keep going. 
You didn't pull away, you didn't tell him to stop or to leave. If the words were to leave your lips, he'd be heart broken, but he'd go. 
If you told him to, he’d walk to the ends of the earth. He’d find the edge and jump, if you so asked. 
But you didn’t. 
You let him take you out when he ran into you at the mall, you were clearly upset about something and he wanted to make you feel better. He told you to dress up and you put on the sexiest dress you had, the one that left nothing to the imagination, and let him pick you up to take you to the nicest restaurant he could find. 
Bucky listened to how you'd been sort of dating a guy from one of your classes, but turns out he was just another asshole who stood you up and cheated on you. He'd wiped your tears with his thumbs, his hands cupping your cheeks as gently as he could. 
He gave you so much time to pull away, to stop him. 
But when he leaned in, pressing his lips to yours as gently as he could, you kissed him back. 
Now, here you two were, in the back of his car, your back pressed up against the door with his head between your legs, his tongue in your core. Your hands tugged on his hair and your eyes were shut as you moaned. 
He pulled his tongue from your folds to hover just over your cunt. Reaching up, he gripped your chin and squeezed your jaw, getting you to open your eyes. 
"Keep your eyes on me," he ordered, waiting for a nod to tell him you heard him before he latched on to your clit, drawing quick tight circles over it while slipping two fingers into your warmth and curling them. 
He never let go of your jaw and you followed his order, never once taking your eyes off his - except when he brought you over the edge. Your head flew back, hitting the window as your eyes shut and you screamed. 
He pulled his face away from your clit and slipped his fingers out of you, maneuvering you to lay over the center console into the front seat, your arms holding you up on the seats. Gripping your hips and lining himself up with your center, he slammed you down on to him and reached forward, threading his hand into your hair before pulling your head up. 
"You didn't keep your eyes on me," He muttered, holding terribly still, making you squirm. "So you're gonna sit here and warm my cock until I think you deserve to cum again. How's that sound?" 
"What - what if someone sees?" You asked,  your voice thin and worn out. You had a point, if someone were to walk by and glance in the front window, they'd have a front seat view to you getting fucked. But if anything, that spurred him on further. 
"Then I'll show them who you belong to."
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sofs16 · 1 year ago
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ripples in our love
part 1: paddock day , part 2: our leclerc win, part 3: our love in photos, part 4: our home — next
not proofread and lots of text / paragraphs ahead:)
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“are you sure you don’t want to come with me” charles asked as he was putting on his shoes.
“charles, i’ve been with you all year and break, have fun with your friends.. just not too much fun” you laughed, clutching your robe closer to your waist as a shiver went down your spine from the ac.
“but i love spending time with you, amour” he sighed, standing up, holding your face between his palms, and kissing you.
“what, you don’t wanna drink and be manly?” you raised a brow “i mean
 i do
” he thought about it “go” you whispered with a reassuring smile. you weren’t one for parties and a part of you was worried charles was being restrained to hang out with his friends because of that, so you encouraged him to have a night out before the races.
“i’ll be back by 12” he kissed you for the last time and you giggled “you better come back home to me, leclerc” you scolded “of course, where else?” and then the door shut.
2am, that’s what the time was. you were sat on the couch in your shared apartment. it was 2 hours since you saw that nightmare of a post. you have been getting multiple texts by the minute.
a part of you wanted to be childish and run away, never facing him. but that wouldn’t be right at all.
you heard the keys jingling on the other side of the door and heard a grunt and stumble. you gulped but trained your eyes on the tv, not really watching the episode of gossip girl.
“amour! you’re here!” charles replied with a cheer in a sluggish manner. he frowned when you didn’t turn around to look at him, or greet him with a kiss or hug as you usually did.
“amour?” he mumbled, stumbling over the couch, clearly drunk. his eyes lit up once they saw your face and he trained to kiss you but you held his face in between your hands before he could. “are you thinking straight right now, charles?”
no nickname. the gears in charles’ head weren’t fast enough at the moment.
“of course, let’s go to bed” he smiled “charles, you kissed another woman” you said quietly, as if you didn’t want to believe it
“No! That’s crazy. I only love you. You only. You’re my everything. I dont like anyone else. You’re my girlfriend. I’ll make you my wife one day” he said against your chest, shaking his head
you found yourself to be someone who cries when they’re frustrated or overly happy. “let’s talk in the morning and get you into bed, ‘kay?” you helped him up as he tried his best to sober up.
unlike the many showers you had together, you left him to shower on his own, making sure he was balanced enough before shutting the bathroom door.
the shower sobered him up quickly. cold water tricking down his body as he revisited the events of tonight. oh how he had messed up.
he stepped out of the shower to see his favorite shirt out, though all his favorite shirts were yours, it was his that was put out. he walked out of the bathroom to find you setting down the trashcan beside the bed, just in case.
“amour, can we talk please?” he held your hand but you dropped it. “tomorrow charles, okay? let’s get you to rest first” you pulled the covers over him, made him take headache pills.
“you
 are not sleeping beside me?” he asked as you made your way to the door. “not tonight, charles” you whispered, turning off the lights and shutting the door.
though he was overthinking that night, the alcohol helped him sleep throughout that night, unlike you.
he woke up and frowned at there being no dip on your pillow and side of the bed. he rubbed his eyes, taking his cellphone and that’s when he remembered it all.
he jumped up the bed and rushed in getting the door open, in hopes to find you. you were sitting at the dining table, staring at the floor below you, tiredness evident through your eyes.
“amour?” you looked up “do you remember it?” you asked and he nodded, taking the seat adjacent to you. “why” you turned to him, swallowing the lump in your throat.
“i- i don’t know. i swear- amour i thought she was you” “i’m fucking blonde, charles” you furrowed your eyebrows
“you know how i am after i drink” true “i don’t- i don’t know what to do, charles” you shut your eyes closed
“amour please, you mean everything to me, you are my everything. if i could take it back or if i had stayed at home with you that night, i would. please don’t leave me” he held your hand quietly. you couldn’t say anything.
silence greeted him.
“tell me what you are thinking. call me names, scream at me, i do not care— just let me in” he asked.
when he said that, he thought you would burn him to the ground and pick on every flaw he had, even hearing you say you wish you had never dated him. your words
 were not that.
“i think
im thinking if i’m enough for you” charles was shocked. “i think about all the girls you could have who are prettier, more famous, kinder, and everything more than i am but you’re stuck with me” you groan in frustration as tears start to well up. “and i can’t help but see you with someone else and it hurts” there they were, tears falling too quick for you to see. charles had never seen you cry, truthfully. “it hurts knowing— you could just leave me and maybe even be with that girl you were kissing last night” you sniffled
“yn,” he said quietly, wiping your tears away “i don’t want to be with anyone else. only you. and i don’t care if they are the models of the year or what. you are the prettiest girl to me and- i cannot let you think that low of yourself. i am so sorry, amour. please, let me fix this somehow. anything, i will do anything”
“i think i need space and time, charles” you looked up to his face. he knew if it weren’t serious right now, you most likely would’ve made an avengers infinity stone joke you were thinking about it, but no words came out
“i- yes. i understand. i’ll go out for a whil-” “i mean, i’ll go back to the house in paris for some while” “what?” his heart sank. “it makes sense right now charles. i need space to think and plus, i was going to go there anyways for fashion week” you rubbed your eyes.
charles knew your relationship with your parents were wobbly as you moved away from france to live in spain. but going back to them? that was how bad this was.
“are you breaking up with me?” he wobbled. “no, i just- i don’t know! i need to think charles” you stood up “please, yn! you- you are the only one for me please do not leave me” he pleaded hugging you from behind.
he hugged that girl from behind.
“you were in this position when you kissed her” you said quietly and charles shuddered at the thought of being with someone who isn’t you. “i’m sorry” you nodded and made a beeline to your bedroom.
30 minutes later you came out with 2 suitcases in hand. it was real. you were leaving. “will- will you be at the gp?” he asked quietly. maybe a little selfishly, but you were his comfort especially during nerve-wracking times like gps. you shook your head no. and he nodded, in understanding.
“do you want me to drive you to the airport?” he asked and you shook your head again. “good luck charles” you sighed, kissing his cheek. you meant for the gp— but so many things were going through his head. ‘good luck living a life without me’ was one of them.
yn.charlesupdate
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yn.charlesupdate No yn at the paddock. Oh we’re done for. view all 7,337 comments
lestappen12 what did you think? she just saw the love of her life kissing another woman 2 days ago

ferr4ribae im tired. august 25, 2024
charles_leclerc
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charles_leclerc P2 for you :) Shame for what happened to Lewis on the first lap, we were lucky to finish the race even with the damage we had. See you next year, Zandvoort.
view all 2,484,399 comments
charlesyn17 He really got guts to post this like he didn’t just CHEAT on yn.
chachahaa cant believe you cheated on yn. she treated you like a king. that’s what’s a shame.
checheco1 Lewis deserved that P2 after what you did to yn.
nightleclerc 
 i can’t keep defending you charles
alphmercedez i hope you dnf 😊
august 26, 2024
yn instagram stories :
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viewers — 3,595,606
â€ïżœïżœ charles_leclerc liked
❀ maxverstappen1 liked
❀ landonorris liked
❀ yourbsf liked
and 1,832,584 others liked this story
yns_love
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liked by yn, and 473 others
yns_love yn actin like he didn’t just cheat on her
 but ok mother we love& trust u and will stfu
view all 1,494 comments
august 30, 2024
yncharle
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yncharle 2 races with no yn. charles p3. 2 weeks radio silence from yn. bye.
view all 1,474 comments
september 11, 2024
yn
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liked by charles_leclerc, and 10,484,484 others
yn 💌
view all 2,585,686 comments
leclerc_pascale Beautiful ❀
‷ yn merci maman 😆
‷ ynlelllerc STOP đŸ„čđŸ„čđŸ„čđŸ„čđŸ„č😭
landonorris You look cool in that 3rd photo 😎
‷ yn cuz i am cool, landito! like u😊
‷ carlossainz55 thats not true
‷ yn dont be mean carlitos, youre cool toođŸ«€
‷ wagsgrid her interacting with the grid is so wholesome đŸ„č
ynsbeaut SHES BACK BITCHES!!
[liked by yn]
dior đŸ€
charlesbae jesus did she buy the whole dior show?
‷ yn GIRL IM NOT THAT RICH 😭 it was for fashion week đŸ€­
chachaaaa Are she and charles still together?
16s55love why is she just ignoring what happened.. she seems unbothered, did she even love charles :/
‷ yn we’re handling this privately so please respect that and dont make such assumptions. and i do love charles, dearly :)
[liked by charles_leclerc]
‷ ynscharles I CANT. THEYRE MY PARENTS YOUR HONOR
softwags._ will you be at baku?
september 12, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
august 21, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
Amour, I am so sorry and I hope you know I never meant for this to happen and you are the only one for me.❀
y/n/nđŸ€ȘđŸ€đŸ’’
thanks charles but i just need time, okay? :)
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
Of course, yes. I will just be messaging you every now and then, would that be alright?
y/n/nđŸ€ȘđŸ€đŸ’’
mhm. good luck on sunday, charles
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
Thank you, belle. I will do my best for you❀
[yn reacted ❀]
.august 22, 2024
sharlie brownđŸ«€đŸŽïž
Hi belle❀ If I am being honest, I am nervous for tomorrow and I wish you were here. I hope you are doing alright there. [yn reacted ❀]
.august 24, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
hello ynn! I got P2 in today’s qualifying though I hope I can turn it into a win tomorrow. We miss you here at the paddock
.august 26, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
Hello amour❀ Remained P2 today but unfortunately took Lewis out:/ I’m sure I’ll be getting an earful from the Mercedes fans but it is alright. I miss you and love you
.august 28, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
Hello, love! Thank you for the story you posted. I hope you are alright and doing well there. Don’t over work yourself, please. I have just landed in Monza and as usual, the fans are crazy! I wish you were here to feel the love they share for you as well. I miss and love you
.august 31, 2024
sharlie brownđŸ«€đŸŽïž
hi love:) I am quite stressed at the moment since the car engine almost gave in during the last turn. I feel it is my fault
 anyways, I do not know if you have been watching. I hope you are doing alright. I love and miss you ❀
september 1, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
P3 today. Disappointed to say the least because if I pushed more I could have won for you.I saw on twitter you are in fashion week already?Do what you love:) ❀
forgot to say hi
 Hi! I love and miss you
y/n/nđŸ€ȘđŸ€đŸ’’ Don’t blame it on yourself, Charles. You can’t always be perfect or always P1 even if you want to. The most you can do is try your best next time and enjoy. You’re world champion and leading the world champion points now:) Fashion week is stressful but I can manage. Stay safe, Charles. I love you.
september 3, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
Hello my love, thank you. I really needed that. I wish I had replied sooner but I have been sleeping a lot.. haha. You will do great, I know you will. I love you, amour and miss you more than you know😘
september 5, 2024
sharlie brown đŸ«€đŸŽïž
Hello, beautiful! How is France?:)
y/n/nđŸ€ȘđŸ€đŸ’’
hi charles:) france is good as always
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sharlie brownđŸ«€đŸŽïž
Amazing photos! I miss you and love you❀
september 10, 2024
y/n/nđŸ€ȘđŸ€đŸ’’
would you mind if i went to baku this week and we talked?
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#SOF: thoughts? :)
thank u btw for all the support in this lil series<3
@glow-ish — your tag! lmk if you wanna be tagged in the next part! feel free to also send in messages thru the ask box hehe
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saerins · 9 months ago
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PREV: #002 PLAYING DOMINO 𖧧 #003 THE FIRST RIPPLE 𖧧 NEXT: #004 THIS SPARK, IS IT REAL? ꒰ series masterlist ꒱
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ê’°àŠŒêš„ïžŽà»’ê’± — ever since the first meeting, you’ve proven to be an anomaly. and yet again, sae finds himself out of character, doing things he didn’t think he would.
content: itoshi sae x female reader. angst/fluff, profanity, physical/verbal abuse, violence, mentions of infidelity, broken homes, unrequited love, manipulation/gaslighting. word count: 6.7k
àŒàŒšàŒàŒš more yn and sae for this chapter yay !! ty to all of you who are reading this heh mwah you guys are my motivation <3 let’s hope i keep this pace up so some of you can get the tea faster :p
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somehow, the fact that you’d managed to help land an interview with itoshi sae has given you some perks at work. (you’d let sumi take the credit for it, but considering your voice is on the recording, it was hard to deny your involvement.) the best of it all? sumi’s right; mr tatsuji is so absolutely pleased that he barely bothers to visit your department to chide any of you.
that way, at least if your personal life is a mess, your career is not. (for now.)
after three days of staying over at eita’s, you’re finally lugging your feet back home today. besides, he has a date and you’re not about to play third wheel when he inevitably comes home with her.
that’s otoya eita for you.
he insisted that it’s fine and if he really wanted to get some that he’d bring her to a hotel, but you’d really rather not get used to putting up at someone else’s house. especially when, technically, you do have a place to stay.
as you unwillingly (and slowly, painachingly) trudge back to your apartment, you can’t help but revisit your messages with sae. ever since you told him you’d let him follow you if he made a private account, he hasn’t responded since.
were you just in over your head? maybe he was just bored and was passing time by texting you. maybe he didn’t really mean it. maybe someone else took his phone and texted you just to make fun of you. 
time to time, you still think of the night you met, how his eyes fluttered close, how he stayed rooted in position, how you would’ve actually done it out of curiosity if it wasn’t for the fact that it was a public place with cameras littering every few inches of space.
you sigh, locking your phone and tossing it back in your purse. in the end, maybe itoshi sae really is just someone for you to admire from afar. maybe that’s for the best; you can’t imagine how it’d even feel like dating someone who has such a big spotlight cast on him.
the evening air is chilly, the lights of the nearby shopping mall a warm golden, the sea of people walking past you soon to drown out. if you didn’t know better, you’d think you’re living a privileged life—being able to live in such a nice district, with a better-than-average apartment that had been fully paid for since you were born. and if life had been kind to you, then maybe you’d like living at home more than you do now.
but as it is, going home only serves as a reminder to all your problems. unescapable, unavoidable, unbearable. and maybe it’s not such a good move for you to depend on eita a lot to be your escape, to help you forget about all of it, at least when you’re with him, but you can’t help it. escapism feels nice. it’s nice to be around someone who knows about it and still accepts you, even though you and him don’t see eye to eye about it most of the time. 
your stomach’s growling, and the macarons at the bakery’s display that you walk past are both nostalgic and tempting. but you can’t afford that.
something as simple as a box of macarons.
hang in there for the long term, you tell yourself. one day, you’ll get everything back. 
not ten minutes later, you’re at your own doorstep, hesitating to even enter. through the door you can hear the sound of the television. it’s loud and playing some drama that always airs at this timing. you’ve heard the same voices so many times before.
it’s funny to think that these sounds used to feel like home to you.
either way, you have to get this over and done with, so you slot your key in and walk through the door, carefully toeing off your shoes as though being quiet would make you escape her notice.
“and where did you go off to the last few days? can’t even come home and be a dutiful daughter and eat with her own mother?”
it hasn’t even been five seconds. 
all that ever awaits you at home now is the vile spit of your mother’s. it’s laughable because all she says is nonsense. you haven’t eaten on the same table together in years, even if you have been living under the same roof.
some part of you can’t help but be defiant. you know it’s a bad idea, but she’s out of line, and yet you’re still helping her. and you can’t figure out why.
“how about you be a dutiful mother and stop spending all your daughter’s money and go find a job?”
there’s a sharp sound that bounces off the walls of the living room quicker than you can expect it, and it takes you five seconds and the sting on your cheek to realise your mother had just slapped you with all her might.
not an ounce of hesitation or regret. there is only fury in her eyes as she looks down at you, summoning every bit of disdain she can muster. 
of course, how could you forget? this is what you get for talking back to her. it’s been a while since she’d last laid a hand on you, so maybe you’d gotten cocky, thinking she wouldn’t do it again.
“is this all you’re good for? you’re not using that filthy mouth to jack people off so you’re using it to spite me?”
there’s a lot you want to say.
you want to talk back to her again, to say that she’s the useless one out of the two of you. the one who doesn’t work yet gambles all day. the one who spent all the savings and insurance money so she’s fully depending on you month to month.
you want to tell her that you’re not some whore who goes around fucking everyone you see. she always hated eita, but that’s because he knows she’s no good. that’s also why you never tell him if she lays her hand on you. you don’t want to get them into any altercations. you also want to tell her eita’s taken better care of you than she ever has, and you don’t even have to jack him off for it.
but you stay silent.
because silence is the most comfortable you can get with her. no matter what you say or do, it will never suffice for her. she wants money, and she’s only angry because you haven’t been home to give it to her. it’s why you lock your own door every time you head out or go to sleep. you don’t want to find your own belongings gone by the time you’re back. neither do you want to find her snooping around your room in the middle of the night.
both of which have happened before.
taking advantage of your shock, she yanks your purse out of your hand, fishing for your wallet and grabbing all the cash she can find before tossing it back to you.
there’s no mercy in her eyes as she glares at her own daughter, the one she carried herself in her womb for nine whole months and once sworn to love. and now she blames the same little girl for ruining her body and refuses to take responsibility for her.
“listen, be a good girl and just give me what i ask for okay?” her tone is nothing but condescending and threatening. “if you’d just behave yourself, i wouldn’t have to do shit like that. think a little, would you?”
the demon that is your mother speaks as if you’re in the wrong, sighing to herself as she lights a cigarette and walks away, stuffing your hard-earned money in her purse before making for her room and slamming the door as she completely disposes of you for the day. she already got what she wanted, after all.
utterly defeated, you completely forget about your hunger, retreating into your room, locking the door behind you and falling to the floor. your vision blurs and your cheek still stings. you wonder if it’ll leave a mark like it did the last time.
your phone vibrates once.
blurry vision aside, you can tell it’s eita from the name alone. his talk to me if you need anything, okay? is bright on your phone screen, the only light in this room because you don’t have the energy to turn on the lights. you’re not feeling exceptionally hopeful today. the dark seems just right.
you’re thankful that you have a friend like him. you probably don’t deserve how nice he is to you. but you don’t want to talk to him. you don’t think you want to talk to anyone.
maybe just one person.
but he’s six foot under and inaccessible to you.
you’re not sure when you made it onto your bed—your head’s a mess. it always is when you speak to her. that’s why you scream into the pillow, willing your energy away, trying to drown your thoughts with your voice, dreaming of the day you can break free from this cycle.
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thunder, pitter patter, raindrops against the windowsill.
the lightning helps you make out the time from the clock on the wall above your door. 
1am. your lips are chapped and the tears are dry against your cheeks. you’d subconsciously slept on the right side, your left still aching from earlier.
slowly, you get up, legs crossed and sitting on your bed, your earlier distress dissipated just slightly, mind a little clearer. (and always questionable.) your phone’s dead and you honestly don’t really care—what you do care about is your stomach’s incessant growling.
it wouldn’t take a genius to know that your mother cleared out all the food in the kitchen. it looked barren earlier from what you could see, maybe just a couple slices of bread and some condiments. you wouldn’t want to start cooking in the middle of the night either, lest she wakes up and you have even more to deal with.
the rain starts to lighten up by the time you’re out of the house, comfortable in your oversized windbreaker. you walk slowly, your slides already soaked from walking in the rain. it’s a nice cooling temperature, the wind in your face making you feel refreshed, like everything that’s horrible could be just a dream.
if only.
a light ten-minute walk later, you’re browsing through the aisles of the convenience store, wondering which brand of processed food is worthy to be your dinner. you hover between the cup noodles on the shelves and the sandwiches in the chiller, taking your time because home is not a place you’re exactly aching to go back to.
can you even call it a home at this point?
eventually, you waltz out of there with a warm tub of noodles, palms relishing in its warmth and your nose inhaling every last bit of its aroma.
dinner could be better, but you suppose you can’t complain when you’re trying your best to save up. after all, it’ll be a pain if your mother figures out the stash of savings you’re hiding. the last thing you want is for her to steal that away from you. then how would you ever move out on your own?
shaking your head as you settle down on a park bench on the opposite side of the road, you decide to throw those thoughts aside for now. it’s not a current problem that you need to mull over right now and destroy your mood. no, right now, what you need is just a peaceful night.
what’s past (earlier) is past.
even though it’s easier said than done when your tears start flowing one by one, and suddenly these noodles are saltier than you remember.
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“sure you can’t come?”
sae looks at bianca through the passenger side window, her pout ever present. “nah, i’m tired. besides, if i oversleep who’s gonna drive you to the airport, huh?”
bianca grins at him, seemingly pacified. she reaches a hand into the car, perfectly manicured nails in full view before she clenches it into a fist, holding just a pinky out. “promise you’ll see me off tomorrow?”
there’s something between the lines that sae doesn’t get, nor is he sure he wants to. in all honesty, he’s not even sure why a promise is wanted here but he sticks out his pinky all the same anyway, because he’s pretty sure he won’t miss the alarm when it rings.
“yay, see you!”
“see you,” sae echoes as she bounds towards her friend’s place, ready for a last night of catching up over a game of cards before she flies back to america. as she disappears from his view, he wonders why she even tried to invite him in the first place. they’re her friends, he’s not really needed there anyway.
tuning out of those thoughts, sae drives off, already planning the remainder of the night. it’s 1am, and it’ll be near two by the time he makes it back to his apartment. that leaves him around a six hour sleep before he has to get up and send bianca off.
now that he’s thinking about it, since when has it become routine for him to send her off every time?
before he can even gather his thoughts about it, he steps on the brakes abruptly, wondering what the hell is wrong with some people to not be looking at both sides of the road before they cross, nearly pressing on the honk before something tells him not to. it’s distracting; the fact that the passing silhouette looks familiar and yet not at all.
against his better judgement, he pulls over by the side of the road, deciding to trust his gut. it’s late at night and there’s no reason for it but is that really you sitting on a park bench eating cup noodles past one in the morning? alone?
sae steps out of the car, mask on, pulling his hat down and his hoodie over his head to conceal himself, though some might argue he looks like he’s about to kidnap someone like this. he’s painfully aware this is dumb, and there’s no point to this, because what if it is you? it’s not like he has any reason to talk to you.
he stops midway, checking his phone and scrolling to your messages, his okay still sitting in the text box, unsent. fuck, he didn’t even realise until now. it didn’t help that he had a hectic schedule back to back for the past few days either. he never got around to creating that private account. he’ll just have to do it later.
a fleeting thought comes to him, wondering if you thought he was just pulling your leg about wanting to follow you. sure seems like it to him.
but he continues walking towards that park bench, towards that girl he thinks might be you, without knowing whatsoever what his next move will be. all he knows is that if that really is you, he’d rather say hello than say nothing at all.
even if it means making a detour that would undoubtedly make him endlessly tired the next day. for some reason.
and call him crazy, but as he draws closer, even without seeing your face, he knows it’s you somehow.
there’s something off about you, he doesn’t know what it is yet, but he can feel it. maybe he’ll find out. maybe he’ll try.
“hey, rude girl.”
just by the way your body stiffens up, he knows you recognise his voice. you choke on your noodles, coughing a little and rubbing your face before you whip your head upwards to face him, your eyes going wide with surprise.
“itoshi sae?”
why doesn’t he like it when you call him by his full name? it sounds weird, but he keeps his mouth shut.
“what are you doing here? do you live in the area?” you ask, setting your almost-empty cup of noodle on the bench. your voice is a little hoarse than he remembers, and your eyes are slightly puffy. there’s a faint swollenness on your left cheek, something he can see you’re desperately trying to hide behind your hair. it’s not really working.
he shakes his head, hands in his jacket pocket. “no, i was just dropping my friend off.” his eyes shift from you to the noodles. “supper?”
sae notices your eyebrow twitch ever so slightly, your nostrils flaring a little before you grin at him. “yeah, i missed lunch so this is me making up for it,” you giggle, offering a thumbs up.
is it bad to say he doesn’t believe you? you’re alone in the middle of the night on a park bench eating instant noodles with a slightly swollen cheek. yet you’re in front of him acting like nothing’s wrong.
this is already far from what he’d usually do. if you were anyone else, he would’ve just drove past and forgotten in a few days that he ever saw them. but as it is, here he is, standing in front of you, car parked illegally by the curb, just to verify that it really is you for no apparent reason.
still, he’s glad he did. you look like you’ve gotten a year’s worth of bad news judging by the state you’re in. and sae usually doesn’t cater to people, expects people to tell him what they need, not make him guess, but he’s already guessing what you might need.
your stomach is still growling, though you’re trying to hide it by slumping on the bench, arms over your stomach. sae has no idea why you feel like you have to hide, or who probably slapped you in the first place, but he finds himself disposing of your noodles before he’s grabbing you gently by the hand, tugging you along with him.
“hey, uh, where are we going?”
despite your shallow hesitation, sae feels your fingers curl around his palm. his heart skips a beat. he stops in his tracks, turning back around to face you. there’s an inexplicable emotion stirring inside him when he looks into your eyes.
his free hand comes up to remove his cap, putting it over your head and pushing it down to fit better. he doesn’t have a mask for you, but it’ll do. something tells him you don’t really want other people to see your face right now. and while the circumstances are different, he supposes he understands how it feels.
maybe you think he’s doing this because he’d rather not be papped with a girl, rather not have any more dating rumours. he’ll let you keep thinking that. he’ll keep acting like he doesn’t see the wound you’re desperately trying to hide.
for now.
“i’m hungry, eat with me,” is all he tells you before he resumes dragging you along behind him, calloused hands wrapping over your own.
sae’s not hungry in the least. he’d eaten probably three meals worth of food with bianca before this since she’d dragged him to a korean barbecue joint.
but you’re hungry. you’re starving and you’re not acting like it and you don’t say a thing about it—he doesn’t really get you.
he wants to.
maybe that’s why he’s doing all this. maybe that’s why he lets you in his car, drives to an izakaya he knows all too well. maybe that’s why he keeps stealing glances at you in the car, and maybe that’s why he feels a little warm inside when he catches you smiling to yourself.
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as you sit silently beside him as he drives, your fingers fiddle nervously with each other. never did you think that you’d end up in sae’s luxurious car tonight of all nights. as if it wasn’t apparent enough before, after seeing his car, this definitely looks like a life that’s far beyond your reach.
you wonder if sae is the type of person who likes cars. it’s never indicated anywhere if he is. you recognise the brand; you don’t know the exact model but it’s a maserati, wrapped a matte black, at that. the interior leather seats are comfortable, and his air freshener smells nice.
on top of that, he’s driving you to someplace because he’s hungry too. talk about luck and coincidence.
you were thinking of just taking a short walk before going back home, but you’d take his invitation over that any day. you’re not sure where he’s taking you, but your feet are tapping in anticipation, though you hope it’s not anywhere expensive because you’re definitely not dressed the part.
beside you, sae’s not exactly dressed in anything fancy, but with looks like that? he would look expensive dressed in anything.
“quit staring,” sae mumbles, and you hurriedly avert your gaze, embarrassed at getting caught although you snicker a little when you catch the hint of a blush creeping up his cheeks. “what are you laughing at?”
you try to suppress a grin, biting on your lower lip. “you’re not as uncaring as the internet makes you seem,” you ponder out loud.
sae accepts your train of thought. he’s well aware that’s how he comes off in real life too. “and?” it’s a red light so he stops the car, turning his head to look straight at you.
is he asking you what you think of him?
you feel your heart skip a beat. he’s pretty, and he’s staring at you with those clear teal eyes of his and it makes you want to drown in them for some reason. he’s not as unfeeling as he comes across, and for him to bother taking you with him just to eat must mean you don’t fall into the category of people he finds to be just a waste of time. 
you want to know what this is.
“i don’t know, you’re like a cat,” you shrug, reverting back to your unserious self. “but i’ll let you know again once i get to know you better, itoshi sae.”
he looks away, the green light barely seeping through his windows. he doesn’t understand. “if you even get that far, that is.” (he likes how you already assume you’ll get to know him more. are you looking to spend more time with him?) 
you grin, making an internal bet with yourself. “just you wait,” you tell him, confident in your abilities. “i have a habit of growing on people.”
(sae chuckles internally, because he doesn’t doubt you. you already are.)
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“are you sure this place is open?” you ask, discreetly tapping lightly on your cheeks, deciding that maybe you look just fine now. and it doesn’t seem like there’s a soul here anyway.
once sae parks his car into the lot, you take his cap off and look around, the sleek stand-alone three-storey building looking completely closed on the outside. there’s no other cars parked here—surely they’re not still open?
sae takes his keys out of the ignition, stuffing it into his jacket pocket. he looks nonchalant for the most part. “don’t worry, i know the owner, let’s go.”
you shrug to yourself, placing his cap neatly on the dashboard before getting up. he waits and observes as you get out of his car, making sure you’re beside him before he starts walking towards the restaurant. you notice him matching your pace, with you shamelessly adjusting it just to check.
before he enters through the doors, he looks at you, “there’s no one else around. just the owner’s nephew who’ll be cooking for us.”
the shopkeeper’s bell chimes as he makes his way inside, holding the door for you, and you wordlessly enter, even though you’re wondering why he feels the need to tell you that. is it because you look like a mess and he thought you’d care?
it’s cosy and warm inside, classical music filling the air, every table wiped spotlessly clean that they’re shining as the lights from the ceiling bounce off of their surfaces. there’s nobody you can see here, are they in the kitchen?
sae puts his fingers around your wrist this time, walking you through the restaurant, meandering expertly like he’s been here a thousand times. your eyes fall to his fingers; they’re gentle yet firm, and you’re only hoping he doesn’t realise how fast your pulse is right now.
in the end, you find yourself seated across from him on a tatami seating in a private room, browsing through the menus that are already placed on the table.
“order anything you want,” sae says, not looking up from his menu.
you hum in excitement as you start to really look at all the options you have. “oh? if you say it like that i’m not gonna hold back, you know,” you joke around, though sae doesn’t really sense it.
he just shrugs, “sure, go ahead.”
sae ends up regretting it though, not because you’re shamelessly spending a lot on his card, but because he finds out you’re the type to over-order. by the time the food is all cooked and sent to the table, sae’s eyebrows twitch, eyes flicking over across the room to look at you, grinning from ear to ear.
“both of you must be starved, huh?”
you look to the side, only now noticing the guy in the white chef’s coat that came to deliver the food. he has curly light brown hair, with eyes a shade or two darker. a grin is plastered on his face, and by the way sae speaks to him, it seems like they know each other quite a fair bit.
“oh, by the way, this is naruhaya,” sae introduces to you, and the guy holds his hand out for you to shake. “this is y/n.”
“nice to meet you!”
naruhaya’s beaming, a contrast to sae’s usual stoic expressions, but he’s back to small talk with the latter in a second. you leave them to it, until your ears perk up when he mentions a certain model’s name.
“hey, weren’t you with bianca earlier? where’s she?”
bianca—that name isn’t unfamiliar to you. after a crash course from sumi (because somehow she decided you need to know more gossip about itoshi sae after getting to know him in person), you had learned that she’s the model that sae is most rumoured to actually be with. and you’ve seen her from the pictures sumi shoved up your neck—she’s beautiful.
was she the friend he was dropping off earlier?
“meeting her other friends. anyway, sorry to keep you open.”
naruhaya waves it off with his hand. “it’s fine, i was gonna stay and try to whip up some new recipes anyway,” he says, before shooting you a knowing look. what exactly it means, you have zero idea. “i’ll leave you two to it, enjoy!”
once he leaves, you begin to dig in, lathering your meat with sauce, unashamedly inhaling your food because that earlier stint with your mother was entirely too much and you need to destress.
somehow, with sae being as nice as he is, you feel a teeny bit guilty for trying to dupe him into that interview. but you doubt that if you’d asked him normally that you would be here with him tonight so maybe there’s some merit in being reckless like that.
“what’re you smiling about now?” sae sighs, taking a piece of meat and putting it over his rice. “pleased that you’re getting a free meal or something?”
partly. but mostly, you’re pleased that you get alone time with him somehow. maybe it’s stupid, and maybe you sound like half of the female population in the country, but you can see why people ogle over him. if they got to know him like this, then you’d have no doubt that he’d manage to charm their pants off.
though, something tells you he doesn’t treat people like this often, let alone someone he barely knows.
“mhm,” you agree, shit-eating grin on your face because there’s no way you’re going to be so upfront about it. the last thing you want is to ruin a friendship when it’s barely started.
yeah, maybe that’s what you want—friendship. is it weird if you say that itoshi sae gives you the feeling that you can trust him? the last time someone made you feel that way was eita. but somehow, this time, it feels different in a way you can’t explain.
as you’re both digging in, you ask him whatever you’re curious about; how he got into soccer, what his life was like growing up, everything under the sun, only because he entertains you like he did that very first night.
“you ask a lot of questions, are you gonna ask me to get another interview approved or something?” he asks, deadpan as he slurps up the soba.
you chuckle, shaking your head. “no. i just want to know you.”
sae stills at your honesty, this being one of the rare times you’re wearing your heart on your sleeve. thump, thump, thump—it’s weird how you make him so aware of his heartbeats when you’re with him. it’s weird how he feels the same way.
then, he sees a familiar sight, you reaching your hand out across the table, your pinky pointed towards him. “i promise you, no hidden agendas this time.”
he swallows the lump in his throat, hooking his pinky with yours before he knows it, the inexplicable emotions only growing by the second.
even though he’s curious about you too, something tells him that you won’t answer him seriously. not tonight. so he keeps it to himself. he’ll find a chance to ask you next time.
if there is a next time. 
he’ll just have to make it happen.
halfway through the dinner, you have about a quarter of the food left and sae looks like he’s about to burst. he didn’t really look hungry to you, eating slowly all the way. you probably ate at least twice as much as he did. 
“you sure you were hungry?”
“not anymore,” sae deflects, putting his chopsticks down. he looks at you, leaning back and staring at the leftovers in awe. he almost snorts from how dazed you look. “i’ll get naruhaya to pack these, wait here.”
“thanks,” you call after him, knowing just how much of a food coma you’re going to be in once you’re back home.
sae stares at his phone as he navigates through the corridors to find the kitchen; it’s already 2.30am. time passes really fast with you for some reason. usually it’s a bore to sit with people he barely knows, they normally can’t keep a conversation. either that or he doesn’t really click with them. (as evident in the many times he was put in the same room with friends of friends and all that was there is awkward silence and forced conversations.) 
not you though.
you’ve always been interesting. you’re intriguing, and a little bit more daring than he’s used to. you’re not that shy, by what he could tell when you so effortlessly reached across the table and snapped a picture of the both of you eating, telling him you want to give him something to remember you by.
as if that’s your last meeting.
he looks at the picture in his photo album. a subtle smile tugs on his lips, and there’s a flutter in his heart that he can’t seem to ignore.
maybe he’s jumping the gun but
 he thinks you could be worth any amount of sleep he’s going to lose.
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naruhaya enters the private room alone, armed with takeaway boxes, and you smile sheepishly at him as he does. sae must be in the bathroom if he’s here alone.
“sorry, i think i ordered a little too much,” you apologise, rubbing the back of your head. “but it’s all really delicious, really.”
it really is. you’ve never had meat so tender before, and you’re almost sad thinking you’ll probably never get to eat this again. not with the price tag on it. 
“relax, i believe you,” naruhaya hums as he carefully places the leftovers in boxes. “so, how’d you get to know sae? photoshoot?”
you narrow your gaze at him, pressing your lips into a faint smile. “if you’re trying to flatter me, it’s working,” you joke, before shaking your head. “no, no, i’m not a model. i’m just a friend of a friend.”
naruhaya blinks at you like he’s surprised. “whose?”
“eita. otoya eita. why?”
“oh, it’s nothing. just
 surprised sae brought another girl here for once,” naruhaya laughs nervously, packing the boxes into a clear bag. “usually it’s either oliver and gang or, well, bianca. but i haven’t seen her here in a while, actually.”
you get the feeling that sae and bianca are really, really close. 
“i think he just came here on a whim,” you brush it off. “we only met a week ago so i doubt you’ll see me here again anyway.”
naruhaya’s mouth forms an ‘o’, before it reverts back to that knowing smile again. both of you hear footsteps against the wooden floors of the izakaya, so naruhaya takes this chance to whisper in your ear.
“i think
 you must be pretty special then, huh?”
before you can even ask him what he means by that, sae strolls through the door, oblivious to the earlier conversation, gaze pointed to you. “ready to go?”
you nod, taking the bags from naruhaya as sae escorts you out of there. “bye, naruhaya! i love your cooking!”
he laughs as you wave enthusiastically to him, and he winks at you right before sae turns around to look at him. “oi, sae, bring her over anytime, okay?” to which sae only waves it off, leaving you to wonder if you’ll ever actually see naruhaya again.
“you keep those,” sae tells you after the both of you get into his car, referring to the takeaway boxes. he’d told naruhaya to give you some extra meat, just in case. if he remembered right, eita once said you have quite the appetite.
he pulls out of the parking lot after you give him your address, driving the speed limit all the way back. he’s honestly kind of tired, and he can see that you are too. won’t hurt to make it back a little quicker than you came. 
“sure you don’t want some?”
“i’m fine, i’ll be busy for the next week or so anyway. i won’t even be home.”
there’s a hint of disappointment in your chest when you hear that, though you chide yourself for your wishful thinking. what makes you think you can run into a celebrity so easily anyway if he is in japan?
“oh, you’re gonna be away? try not to miss me.”
sae chuckles, softly, at the way you can be so unserious—it’s something you hear for the first time, and you feel the flutters in your heart going wild. there’s something about the way he looks so gentle like this, away from the cameras and the public eye that makes him so much more alluring than usual.
“i’ll try,” he says, though you know he’s just playing along.
usually, you don’t feel this type of way around people. you’ve never felt like this before so you can’t even think of ways to explain it. as you sit in the passenger seat, you can’t help but feel a certain attachment growing. it makes you think foolish things like i want to see you again and wonder about even sillier things like would you want to see me too?
but you’d never actually tell him that.
when your apartment comes into view, you grab at his cap on the dashboard, putting it on your head yourself this time, looking into the side mirror. “hm, think this looks better on me, what do you think?”
sae’s a little stunned at the sudden question. you have a way of making him exasperated—in all the good ways. “wanna keep it?” he’s guessing that’s where you’re headed. not that he minds. 
“oooh, then maybe i get to sell it for a buttload of money. especially when i tell people it belonged to you,” you smirk, and sae finds himself wondering why your guard is up so high.
he starts driving a little slowly, starting to feel the reluctance brewing inside him. “it’s yours now, do whatever you want with it.” he knows you’re not actually going to sell it anyway. he might not have known you for long, but he thinks you’re not that kind of person.
he’ll bet on it.
you don’t say anymore about it, and he catches you with a blank stare straight ahead, aimed at your apartment.
does it have something to do with your family? was that why you were unhappy earlier?
sae can’t shake the feeling of wanting to know more about you. but you snap back to your usual self before he can do anything about it.
“anyway! don’t worry about tonight, i won’t tell a soul that a superstar like you took a nobody like me out for a romantic supper in a private room,” you tell him, winking as you place your hands on the door handle, ready to go.
sae nearly laughs. “can’t you say thank you like a normal person?” because by now, the both of you are comfortable enough to understand that nothing is ever said in hostility. you take it as his banter.
somehow, your hand finds itself back onto your lap, and the words haven’t left your lips. there’s no music in the car, so it’s just you and sae and the air between you, a tension looming in the air that you can’t ignore. there’s just silence as you observe him from your position, your head inching closer, ever so slowly it feels like you’re not even moving at all. you can see how sae’s gaze flickers from your eyes to the tip of your nose and then to your lips, and you think of how he looks almost like he did that night when you got close to him.
except this time, you’re really tempted. you’re alone, just the both of you, and he’s been really nice and you’re really tempted to feel how soft those lips are and what he tastes like. but that’s too much, and yet somehow his eyes feel like they’re telling you different. would he mind?
your fingers pull the cap down from your head, covering both your faces as there’s barely any space between you now.
maybe just something tame.
in one swift motion, your lips press against his cheek, a hurried thank you rolling off your tongue before you bolt out of the car and back to your apartment, hoping that sae doesn’t think you’re a complete psycho for doing that. 
back in the car, sae freezes in position even after you’ve long vanished from his sight. his heart’s still beating wildly in his chest and he wonders what the hell just happened.
and then he finds himself questioning when it could happen again.
why does he want it to happen again?
before he starts the drive back, he does three things.
one, he fishes his phone out of his pocket and creates that account he forgot about. two, he sends you a follow request because he doesn’t think he can handle this curiosity anymore. and three, he opens your messages, breathing shallow as he tries to make plans for the first time.
an hour later, after you’re showered and your heart has calmed down, you check your phone, charged to full now on your bedside table. there’s a few messages from sumi and eita that you missed since it had been dead since before you left the house, and then your heart skips a beat when you realise that sae’s name is there as well.
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for the first time in a long time, you go to bed feeling like a giggly high school girl who’s been asked out by her crush. and for the first time in forever, sae receives your message and finds that he can’t sleep now—wondering why he felt so relieved to finally get a text back, and wondering what this frantic rush of his heart really means. 
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extras !
no, sae did not get up late to meet bianca the next day. he did look extremely tired though, which made her suspicious and ask why—sae did not reveal anything, just said he couldn’t sleep. partly true.
sae was right; if he’d asked yn about herself that night (particularly anything pertaining to her family), she wouldn’t have answered seriously. there’s a reason why she won’t so easily divulge her family issues & doesn’t want sae to know about it.
yn genuinely believes that sae did not notice anything off about her and that he honestly thought she was fine.
otoya did end up bringing his date to a hotel. after she fell asleep, otoya went out to the balcony to call yn and make sure she’s okay since she wasn’t responding.
yn’s mother knows that yn and otoya used to fuck (and still thinks they are), and that’s why she used her choice of words “jacking people off”. she has been treating yn like that for the past few years.
random fact #1: otoya used to purposely get yn in trouble all the time in school so that they could spend time in detention together. that’s how they started getting close.
random fact #2: sae has, in his head, considered being together with bianca before because the guys asked him about it.
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taglist! @yuzurins @saeskiss @raphsimp @lust4rin @mxplesyrvp @chieeeeeee @yumekolovesyukimiya @kunirayuna39 @auranny @sereniteav @gskill @saesgrl @riseena @rikijbol @sagejin @shironagi
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