#i want to make one for ted and one for beard tbh

[despite-everything]

i'm giving in. making a trent crimm playlist

[altschmerzes]

Hello! Just recently got into Ted Lasso and I'm really enjoying your fics! The characterization is just chefs kiss and the plots are just wonderful. I was just wondering how Roy reacts to the Jamie's poster in the baby AU? I feel like he would have lots of feelings about it. TBH I'm not exactly what those feelings would be, just that he had a lot of them. Hope you have a nice day!

im so glad you’re enjoying my work, thank you so much!!

and OH yeah he absolutely has a lot of feelings about it. a LOT. especially because of the context in which he learns about it. the poster is a secret much, much longer than in canon - they don’t talk about it at the gala and roy doesn’t actually find out about it until he sees it with his own eyes.

this is a bit of an explanation of some events around the 2x08 of it all in wriggle up so if anyone wants to go into that not knowing anything, im putting it under a cut! also cw for pretty direct references to child abuse.

so basically the crux of the 2x08 equivalent events in this fic is the discovery that jamie is 100% definitely without a doubt being abused, and he is currently seriously hurt after a particularly violent incident of abuse. there’s a confrontation with his father a la 2x08 and ted and roy end up taking him to a hospital after that because it becomes clear to them that he’s like. he is hurt and he needs medical attention. this is also how he actually Leaves his dad’s home for good. there’s some conversations with doctors and social workers at the hospital and ultimately ted takes him home and he never goes back to his dad’s place after that.

one of the things that happens in the next couple of days though is he needs his things. so, despite the fact that he’s sixteen and doesn’t need a babysitter, he’s dropped off with the higgins family to look after him while ted, roy, beard, and rebecca drive up to manchester to pay his dad a visit and make a few things clear about how things are gonna be from here on. (ie you will stay away and leave him alone, we’re here to get his things, if you make trouble we can make far worse trouble for you)

so they go to gather his things. beard and rebecca stay to make sure james doesn’t cause an issue while ted and roy go to get his things together. so roy is the one to first go into his room, and that’s where he sees the poster on the wall, clearly having been transported through a few moves, a little battered, and it just. breaks him. it’s the first time he cries about any of this, and he cries hard, though he also is careful to stay as quiet as he can because he doesn’t want jamie’s father to hear from the other room. ted is confused and alarmed until he sees what roy is looking at and well. yeah.

they’re very careful in removing the poster from the wall and rolling it up to take it with them. they don’t want to risk tearing it - it’s clearly very, very important to jamie. so they take it along and leave it in his room at ted’s along with the rest of his things for him to find so he can unpack and set it up however he wants.

[mexicangela]

okay. so. about tedbecca.

this is long and i apologize i just have thoughts. first, the fakeout in the beginning was cruel. BUT i was willing to forgive because tbh it was kinda funny and i’m not convinced that the “morning after” tension between ted and rebecca didn’t make everyone, everyone, think for just a second that they had slept together. y’know, like, if there was never any chemistry there, why the fakeout to get tedbeccas excited/cut them down and antis worried? did the reason for ted, beard, and jane being there really make a ton of sense? no. therefore, it really does feel like it was just something they wrote in to be mean and, like. come on, guys. why be mean? second, their talk in the stands??? you gotta be fucking kidding me. rebecca welton poured her fucking soul out to ted and he didn’t have a thing to say about it other than that “i’ve already made my decision” bullshit? didn’t even offer her a hand or hug of comfort? how out of character was that? he seemed so stoic through the whole episode, like he was stunted. which, maybe has to do with his being sad about leaving but still it threw me off. jesus, talk about “subverting expectations” or whatever. also, the things rebecca was saying? “you go, i go”? the ultimatum of “either we both stay or we both leave” and then her saying they’d both go only to take it back in the end? be so fucking for real right now. the offer to pay him insane amounts of money then telling him there was really no kind of monetary compensation that could represent how much he meant to the club (and her), the proposed solution to bring his child and his child’s mother over to london for him to stay (it is one thing to offer to get henry over, but to extend the offer to michelle is something else)? those aren’t things regular old friends say/do for each other, i’m sorry. listen, i love my friends but that’s a lot to offer anyone. you really have to love someone to be willing to do all that and cry real tears while begging them to stay, to choose you, to choose the home you’ve made for yourself. third, the airport scene gutted me but AGAIN i was kind of at peace with it. it would have at least left it super open ended and allowed the fanbase to imagine what could have happened afterward, y’know. like the whole “rom-com leave-cute” thing was another mean thing to do because where was the rom or the com about that?? why do that? but like i said, i would have been at peace with it because, dear god, the way rebecca was looking at him (again, ted gave us almost nothing but whatever. not even a tear? ugh.). i mean, she was looking at him like she wanted to say “stay. choose me. choose your own happiness.” also i know she’s loaded but WHO BUYS A FIRST CLASS TICKET JUST TO GET PAST SECURITY ONLY TO SAY GOODBYE TO A GOOD PAL? doesn’t make sense to my little pea brain!!! sudeikis, make it make sense (unfortunately for me and everyone around me i still love him)! there really should have been an “i love you” and not even necessarily in a romantic way. these two are supposed to be soulmates, cosmically connected, there’s not supposed to be one without the other and all we got was…”thank you” and a head nod? like, yes, thank you. thank you for showing me warmth and kindness and grace. thank you for reminding me what my strength looks like. thank you for being there for me. yes, yes, yes, thank you! but an “i love you” really would have been wonderful and i’m actually sad they didn’t get to hear it from each other. fourth, the way nameless boat dude came back in like a fucking generic ass early disney prince was just lame. i thought it was lazy. here we have a rebecca who is devastated that this weird, funny, kindhearted american football coach who shoved himself into her life and her heart has just left to go back to kansas and this little dutch girl trips and suddenly rebecca’s found happiness? it’s frustrating. really, it is. like i’m happy rebecca has a shot at happiness and a family, but she just as well could have had it with ted, who is admittedly very similar to this dutch man. i don’t get it. this is where it well and truly lost me. fifth (this one’s a three parter, sorry), where’s ted’s happy ending? because i don’t think it’s a life of volunteering to coach children’s soccer. i know people have been implying/worrying that ted and michelle reconcile but i don’t see that happening. ted, at his core, is still the man michelle left. he’s still overly optimistic (although we didn’t see that in the finale, like what?), he’s still punny, and let’s be real, he’s still a mess. i didn’t see the resolution to his arc. in fact, returning to kansas feels like a regression. he literally ran from kansas. that’s the whole reason he went to richmond in the first place. what changed? why is he going back now? for henry, yes, of course, that’s understandable. and at the same time, within the show we’ve been shown that the bond of a father and child is not always enough to get dad to stay/be a good and decent father (i.e. ted’s father, i.e. james tartt sr., i.e. rebecca’s father). this isn’t, of course, true for ted and henry, but i think it’s a point to make concerning everyone saying things about the child-parent bond being end-all, be-all. for some people, that’s true. for others, it isn’t. it isn’t a jab at anyone or the parent-child relationship in general, it’s just the truth. this is a coin that has two sides, y’know. got off course there but anyway, henry also could have gone to london, which i think might have been the best thing for him anyway, he seemed to have a good time there and he would have had a whole band of new brothers with all the himbos. michelle isn’t a bad mother by any means, but she’s got her own shit to work through if the whole doctor jacob thing was anything to go by. i also don’t think the show did all that great of a job showing us that henry had this super deep connection with his dad, but maybe that was just me lol. regardless, i still understood the bond and its importance and of course ted wanted to be there for his child. that part does make sense. the way it was gone about felt like a disservice though. ted’s expression at the end there doesn’t scream happy. he looked rather sad to me, like something was weighing on him still. and i’m sure there was. i don’t think he’s at peace with himself yet, or happy. maybe he’ll get happy in kansas. i hope he does. but getting to see rebecca’s “happily ever after” and not ted’s hurt my heart. guess i was hoping they would actually subvert the expectations and have him stay in the home he’d made for himself instead of going back to the place where he lost so much. why did he have to give up his found family and the job he loved (and was still actively learning about!! offsides!!) and the best friend he made and the support system he found (which, no matter your age or your progress, you always need a support system) and the community that had come to love him andandand- all ted did was sacrifice to make other people happy and better and this feels like another sacrifice because his mom guilt tripped him by saying something he already fucking knew (sorry i’m not a fan of dottie). i just don’t get it. how is his happy ending going back to the root of all his problems and staying there? just sucks, really, even if it was always the obvious outcome. sixth, i’m just mad all the signs lead to nowhere. the matchboxes, the army man, the bantr fakeout (will never, ever be over this one), the hotel room fakeout where they cut from rebecca to ted in the room and then he opens the door and it’s sassy, the romcommunism, the soulmatism. it wasn’t all for nothing, of course. their friendship is so important and i love it, but this ending felt like a big fuck you to it too because ted was so…distant. it almost felt like he didn’t care that much that he was leaving rebecca and it makes me super upset. all of this is based on the one-time watch from last night but tbh i don’t know if i can handle watching the episode again right now. it really did hurt, especially the way rebecca looked at him at the airport. tbh nothing can convince me she wasn’t at least a little bit in love with him. and, yes, i know. henry is ted’s everything and that’s so admirable and it’s not all about romance, and it’s not. but just let me believe what i want to believe. let me find the joys in the media i consume and if it’s the hope that two attractive, single, middle aged leads could have gotten with each other in the end and figured out how to be happy together, then so be it. i just hate seeing the hate from all sides, honestly, and a lot of people are legitimately really mean about it when this show is all about being kind. ted lasso is a beautiful series and, at the end of the day, it’s just another piece of media that the audience is free to interpret and pick apart however they want to. me, personally? i will continue to live in my delusional little world where ted and rebecca figure out that they belong together/i will pretend the last 10 minutes of the finale didn’t happen. thanks for coming to my tedtalk.

[rebeccasbiscuitbox]

Okay, I wanna take just a second to talk about things I actually liked in the finale. (In roughly chronological order because I can't remember exact timing of some scenes.)

Stuff I already mentioned: The last ride of the Diamond Dogs, with Roy finally joining the pack! COLIN KISSING HIS FELLA AT THE END OF THE MATCH! Rebecca choosing to keep Richmond and share it with the fans! A women's team!

1.) Higgins and Keeley trying to get Rebecca to talk about Rupert's divorce. I relate to the mixture of trying to be a supportive friend, wanting the tea, and wanting the opportunity to trash someone you hate.

2.) Ted and Rebecca sitting right beside each other in a sea of empty seats. It was kind of romantic, but I also liked it as a callback to Ted and Roy sitting together in one of the earliest episodes. So I would've liked a little callback to the "This is what my ticket says" line which is an underrated joke, IMO, and would've helped the tension, but that's fine.

3.) I love Rebecca outlining how Henry could come over to England, and having a plan for Michelle, too, because she doesn't just want to pull him away from his other parent. She really cares about Ted's family. But then she doesn't mention Jake at all cause fuck that guy.

4.) Ted's approval of the team's good-bye dance leading to a completely over-the-top celebration complete with Trent taking off his jacket and whirling it in the air. It was so ridiculous.

5.) The return of Shannon! Did we see her in any other episode this season?

6.) Sassy roasting Rupert one last time. I love it. I love her.

7.) Beard going a little too hard on the good-bye video and everyone starting the match crying.

8.) Barbara.

9.) I really like how much of the match we got to see. I feel like it took up half the runtime or so? Which feels like a lot more than we usually get and I feel like that makes sense given what a big part of the ending it was.

10.) I love Dr. Sharon getting so into the match. She really loves that team. And her coming back to head up a whole mental wellness department was so lovely.

11.) The whole part with the BELIEVE sign and the fact that they kept the pieces close to them. I was a little skeptical at first cause, like, it sure didn't seem like enough pieces to go around but yeah, it got me in the end.

12.) Higgins seeing that Isaac is taking the kick and immediately trying to protect his wife.

13.) Rupert being chased off the pitch by thousands of people calling him a wanker. Poetic cinema.

14.) Ted doing the same dance that he did with his former team.

15.) The return of the Ussie Guy!

16,) The snowglobe!

17.) KBPR! Complete with that one guy! I forget his name but I liked him.

Hey, that's a longer list than I expected, tbh.

Okay, back to complaining.

[trelkez]

Things I enjoyed about Ted Lasso 3.08:

- Will and Henry - Beard and Henry - Richard tearfully saying goodbye to his camera roll - "woof" - password with two s's - Jamie in general

On the whole, though, I was pretty unhappy with this episode, so let's get into it.

1. Let's get this out of the way first, because this is one big part of the episode I wasn't mad about: the Isaac and Colin stuff. I thought the set-up was actually really effective: Isaac trying to force the team to be better people, being firm and supportive and a good ally to women (I was literally clutching my chest during that scene), and then the sharp, sudden drop when he sees the pictures on Colin's phone and storms off. This felt unfortunately true to life for me; being a good ally in some ways doesn't automatically make someone a good ally in others.

I'm hoping this is going to be resolved in the next episode in an uplifting way, because Colin needs it and frankly I, as an Isaac fan, need it. (I've been dreading this moment since Isaac's "that's gay" comment earlier on. This is a show about growth! I need to see that growth.) But I'm not too worried, because they haven't set up anything unresolvable here. I would do whatever the 2023 equivalent of burning your DVD boxed set is if they decided to give Isaac an unredeemed homophobic villain turn at the very end of the series, but I don't think they're going to do that. Conflict, sure; some needed growth, yes; but this isn't a show designed to suddenly pull the rug out from under you and tell you that people are bad, actually. In this one, very specific area, I have faith in the show to do right by us.

And on a sidenote: I've seen mixed reactions to Isaac getting on his soapbox about privacy and then grabbing Colin's phone and looking at his pictures without permission. I wasn't upset about it, tbh. They have been really consistent in showing how Colin defaults to toxic masculinity as a cover, and never moreso than here, where he tries to say what he thinks the average straight guy in a locker room would say and is then surprised to be called out on it. He implied he's going to be looking at the leaked photos, pushes back hard when he's told not to, slinks off with his phone - with every single part of how he acts, and especially with them knowing that Keeley's photos are out there, I would've grabbed his phone too.

What gets me about that moment isn't Isaac violating Colin's privacy, it's that Colin has so thoroughly drawn toxicity around himself like a shield that Isaac has no reason to trust him to do the right thing.

2. I know this isn't really a show about football, but it's still a show structured around football. Season three has been largely indifferent to that, and the lack of structure is really becoming a problem.

3. Nate and Jade are truly adorable, and that makes it all the more frustrating that they went so far with Nate last season and are now attempting to heal it through the power of "but he's a good guy actually." You took him pretty far down the path, show. Move him out of Richmond, and suddenly he isn't the cruel, narcissistic, handsy, life-ruining guy the show slowly built him up into? If this is supposed to be Nate returning to the light because he sees how terrible Rupert is and realizes where he's gone awry, they aren't showing Rupert nearly enough to get that across.

I don't want Nate to have to suffer forever for what he did, because this whole show is about flawed people getting second chances and finding joy and having people to lean on! But what they've done this season has felt like mid-season two Nate suddenly woke up and found out he was the manager of West Ham, and now has to bumble his way through fame while slowly realizing that the things he thought would make him happy are actually hollow without the people who cared about him along the way. Which is a perfectly fine storyline, if Nate had in fact spontaneously disappeared halfway through season two. Since he didn't, we're left with a season that is mostly just saying a lot, "but you still LIKE Nate, right?"

We're being asked to take it on faith that at some point, there will be a reckoning over season two - but for now, can't we just go along for the ride? If they had just let Nate apologize to Ted in episode four, that could have been part of a longer arc of character growth instead of - it seems like - the end point of the story. They could even have had Ted get swept away onto the team bus before he had time to respond, left it unresolved, and still taken a concrete step forward for Nate that is so far entirely missing.

Nate and Jade and their cute romcom scenes especially stand out within this episode. This ep violated Keeley as a plot device; remember when Nate kissed Keeley in the dressing room and we just moved on like nothing had happened? This ep has (at least temporarily) confirmed Colin's fears about the team finding out about him; remember when tearing down Colin's self-confidence was a key part of Nate's journey to the dark side? This ep has Ted taking his kid to Nate's game in West Ham gear; remember when Nate tried to ruin Ted's life? It makes complete sense for Ted, being Ted, to forgive (or tell himself he forgives) and move on without doing any actual emotional processing about it, but you can't ask the audience to do that too.

I was really worried about this after season two ended, knowing that season three was going to ask me to go along on a Nate redemption arc and not being sure how that would go. So far, I'm wildly unimpressed.

But Nate and Jade are very cute.

4. I am so tired of the Ted and Michelle drama, and I really wish I didn't know enough about Jason Sudeikis' personal life to be stuck seeing this as a guy throwing away his own titular character so that he can take shots at his ex-wife. There has been absolutely nothing to Ted's character arc this season except his angst over Michelle. The Dr. Jacob stuff is in fact really unethical and you can look at all of this and say, yeah, this really would send someone into a season-long funk! But why is it even happening? It's like all of the life has been drained out of the character. I for sure do not expect Ted Lasso to be happy and engaged all of the time - I made an entire Ted vid about anxiety and panic attacks and gloom! - but there are storylines about depression and then there's this, which is turning the show's central character into narrative dead weight.

The point at which Ted is so obsessed over Michelle that he's neglecting his extremely limited time with his son to try and stalk his ex-wife on her vacation - that's the point at which things have officially gone off the rails. Episode after episode I've thought, okay, now things are turning around. I really thought we'd turned a corner in Amsterdam, but somehow, things keep getting worse instead. Are we finally going to turn a corner now? Is there enough time left in the season for them to do anything meaningful with Ted Lasso the character at all, particularly given that this season is probably his swan song?

(And I’m not even sure if the feeling of things going off the rails was intentional or not! Did they know what they were doing when they put a story about Ted trying to PI-stalk his ex-wife alongside a story about a woman’s right to privacy? Is that an intentional contrast so we go, wow, Ted has really gone off the deep end here, or did no one do the math?)

About the only good thing to come from this storyline to date is Beard's Hey Jude interlude with Henry. Beard, you have some interesting ideas about what kids should do on vacation, but you are a very good friend and uncle.

5. And finally, oh god, Keeley. I don't even know where to start.

It really feels like they said, "you can have bi Keeley, but only if her girlfriend is obviously a villain who exists to put her through it on her way back to a man." That writing on the wall was why I was never particularly excited about Keeley and Jack.

Even so: in my wildest dreams I did not imagine they would do her this wrong. In what way was this ep's storyline even remotely necessary? The one and only thing it does that couldn't be achieved by other plot means is to violate and traumatize Keeley, and there is absolutely no reason to do that.

I know the episode was (co-)written by Keeley Hazell, who surely has some feelings about a model's right to privacy, and a lot of it does feel very pointed in that Very Special Episode way of commenting on how women are sexualized without their consent and impressing on the audience the importance of men standing up for women & everyone respecting the privacy of your partners, even after relationships are over. Other women won't defend you just because they're women, class solidarity wins out, internalized misogyny is very real - that all feels very deliberate. I feel like I get where this episode is coming from, and I can see the good intentions and desire to communicate specific messages behind it.

But, honestly: this is a mess. We always knew the Jack plotline was going to end poorly one way or another, but there were plenty of ways to reveal Jack as a not-great person without swerving into "your sex tape is your fault" partner blame. No matter its intentions, what this episode actually does is use a violation of a woman's privacy as a way to let male characters show off as good guys while a woman becomes a villain. It uses Keeley's suffering to advance plotlines she isn't even remotely part of, like Colin being outed to Isaac. It is, very clearly, setting Keeley up to lose her business - Jack was her source of funding; this isn't going to be a one-episode plotline. Some of these are bigger, structural problems rather than questionable one-episode script choices, and it gets me back to how I really just don't know what the show thinks it's fucking doing with some of these season arcs.

(Where is Rebecca? I'm not mad about the fertility storyline like some people are - it tracks for me - but why is she spending entire episodes as an expository device and plot advancer for other people's stories?)

And since I've seen so much back and forth on it: my assumption in the moment re: Roy was that he was trying to ask if the video was for him, if the leak was in some way his fault, and wasn't interrogating her about who she was making explicit videos for. But I'm ... also not sure that makes any sense (wouldn't he know if it had been for him?), so I may just be giving a lot of benefit of doubt here to avoid how otherwise wildly out of character that exchange would be. There's a difference between expecting characters to be good and unproblematic all of the time, which I don't, and expecting characters to stay loosely true to who they have consistently been all along, which I do. "Roy expresses himself badly" is not an excuse for the choices that went into that exchange; it was just bad writing.

Four episodes to go! Wow, do they have a lot of ground to cover before then. 😅

[mr-independent]

Sorry for the hiatus, i haven't slept in 48 hours 🤷🏻‍♂️

Series 2 episode 1, lessgo

-- 7 consecutive ties is fucking ridiculous tbh. Statistically unlikely at best, especially since the dog died just so it could keep going

-- the slow mo is so good, you can tell their budget fucking tripled going into this series

-- i gotta wonder if the entire show has been planned from day one or if they just keep rewatching and keeping track of little things as they go

-- Keeley's imitation of Ted is hilarious

-- Ted making every journo nearly cry talking about a dog he had for only a year in high school... The power this man has. Especially over Trent, who looked as besotted as me in high school when i watched Independence Day for the first time and discovered that Jeff Goldblum could be nerdy, sweet, and Hot all at once

-- Ted. Diane Sawyer is 77 years old. Why do you want to date someone nearly 30 years older than you?? ... Ok yes fine thats hypocritical coming from me after that last bullet point. I concede my point.

-- Bearded Roy actually looks more like Grouch lmao

-- you know when i first watched this ep i thought Roy hated pundits bc he thought they were generally stupid, but knowing what we know now about his past with Trent Crimm....

-- 'i wish I was Keeley 3 or 4 times a day' me too, Ted, me too

-- Ted's introduction to girl talk 🥰

-- Beard subtly trying to convince Ted not all therapists are trying to fuck him over before we even know the background is so touching

-- WAIT THE COUPLES THERAPIST USED TO BE MICHELLES REGUALR THERAPIST??? And now they're dating??? That man is violating so many rules...

-- Roy probably only knows Rebecca through Keeley - she doesn't interact much with the players, at least on screen, and he's still telling her she deserves someone who makes her feel like she's got struck by lightning

-- Sharon getting people to tell the gods honest truth within like 5 sec of meeting them is such an enviable skill

-- Sassy coming in with the bars 'intimacy is leaving yourself open to being attacked'. Sounds like a lasso-ism tbh, which means Rebecca has a very particular taste in friends

-- Ted's hair when Dani gets over the yips is so endearingly tousled 😍

-- Dani describing Dr Sharon sounds like every time i try to talk abt therapy with my friends lmao. It's incomprehensible at best

-- How did Roy meet the yoga mums? Why did they invite this strange sour hairy man to their nights of yoga and the bachelor? I have many questions...

[selenityshiroi]

The Ted Lasso finale was perfectly described as 'bittersweet'.

I liked that it continued the theme of the series of how people can grow and change. How things might not be perfect but you can still find happiness. How sometimes you need to accept losses to make way for future victories. How sometimes a loss isn't the end of the world. How even the worst of people can still try to change (Jamie's dad in rehab) whilst some may never change (Rupert).

But at the same time...I do wish there was a little more resolution. Especially if this is, indeed, the very end of the show.

This would have been a good lead in to a surprise next season. Especially for Ted. The rest of the team is (mostly) in a good place. With the exception of the lack of (onscreen) resolution to Roy, Keeley and Jamie. But Ted? He just...seems to have accepted nothing for himself except being with his son. Which, in and of itself, isn't the worst thing because he loves Henry and wants to be there for him. But you can't have your entire life revolve around one person (even your child). It isn't healthy. If we'd seen a sign of him accepting a new job or even having a new home (instead of just turning up at his ex wife's house with suitcase in hand) then it would have seemed less sad.

For the players and Rebecca I'm okay with their endings. I'm not overwhelmingly happy with boatman and bonus daughter but I'm not overly opposed, either. I'm glad Sam got onto the Nigerian team but less happy that we don't know why Okufu is apparently no longer an obstacle. I'm glad Colin got to kiss his fella but they've avoided the more difficult subject of the rampant homophobia in the world of football by not having to address it with more episodes (although I'm also glad it was just a win for him and not the start of the same 'now it's going to bite you in the ass' storyline we've seen over and over for queer chatacters). But, overall, the team is in a good place.

Beard and Jane...I really wish I knew if the writers understood how bad their relationship comes across? Like...the more extreme parts of their relationships just seem like some joke to them. And, clearly, Beard consents to a lot of stuff. But then they have red flag behaviours everywhere and they just brush it off??? The ropes joke is just clearly them having a safe, sane and consenting sex life. But the passport thing is like 'yikes'.

Also, I don't like that they opened the episode with the baiting scene of Ted and Rebecca. It seemed a bit like a 'haha fuck you' rather than a 'lol, you thought'. I wasn't convinced in Tedbecca nor was it essential to me. But I liked them and I thought they were good together. I'm happy for them to be platonic or romantic. But that opening just felt like the audience were being made fun of rather than them being in on the joke.

Anyway, still a good show and a good episode. But the finale didn't leave me all that satisfied. I didn't walk away thinking 'I'm happy to leave Richmond behind'. But I also didn't walk away thinking 'I absolutely have to have more episodes now'. So it felt partially resolved but not fully. But resolved enough that I don't need more even though I wouldn't mind more. Which is the place where fandoms die in my heart, tbh. Because if I'm not thinking about what comes next (for good or for bad) then I don't think much about them at all.

[lunar-years]

I mean, I’ve gotta send you Ted Lasso for the fandom asks 😉💖

also @roykentjamietartt and anons who also gave me ted lasso :)

the character i least understand: Beard. That man is an enigma and I frankly just don't care enough to dive into his brain and try to unpack all that LOL.

interactions i enjoyed the most: Favorite ever moments are the Jamie/Roy s2 hug and Keeley & Roy surprising Jamie in the treatment room with champagne. Also: The s1 "Be a Goldfish" speech, Keeley talking to Roy on the treadmill which is my favorite all-time roykeeley scene ("that was for world hunger" "and I believe it was the cure" <33), Jamie teaching Roy how to ride a bike!!, Keeley's "You're a battler" talk with Jamie, TWO COFFEES ONE CUP, Higgins telling Keeley it's okay to leave for new opportunities, the team fixing Sam's restaurant, the s1 bonfire!! Gosh there are so many amazing scenes.

the character who scares me the most: jamie's dad in the wembley scene and again in the scene where he nearly kills Beard.

the character who is mostly like me: Nate, tbh. But I like to think I'm Nate at his very best and not anything like him at his worst :) I just relate to his specific brand of anxiety and burnout and being good at a lot of things but never feeling like there's that one thing you're good enough at that you're meant to do it forever. Also the crippling insecurity woop. The scene where he paces outside taste of athens too scared to go in even though Jade can clearly see him through the window was very me-coded, lol.

hottest looks character: Two-way tie between Keeley & Jamie, clearly.

one thing i dislike about my fave character: S1 Jamie and his terrible defense mechanisms and poor coping skills. Hiding the best parts of himself behind the worst parts to protect the core of him he doesn't want anyone to see. The s1 scenes with Nate & Sam in particular are very much Jamie at his worst!

one thing i like about my hated character: Rupert you suck ass but I guess I appreciate his passion and commitment to being the absolute fucking worst <3

a quote or scene that haunts me: Jamie's dad at Wembley, Ted/Rebecca funeral scene where it jumps between the two of them telling their parallel stories of the same night. God that was True Cinema (TV version, lol). From this season, "It's like I've got that, it's like I've got in my soul" :(

a death that left me indifferent: n/a this ain't that kind of show lol

a character i wish died but didn’t: I wanted Edwin Akufo to die in a mysterious offscreen private plane crash so that he could no longer hyper-fixate on making Sam's life the absolute worst at all times but hey, I guess Sam found a way to get on the National Team even with Edwin shelling out millions to keep him off of it so like, that's even better.

my ship that never sailed: uhhh RJK if you think they didn't sail. Personally I think they did sail so like. I won on ships tbh.

thank you!!

[shrinkthisviolet]

Ted Lasso Finale Thoughts

(because liveblogging is exhausting)

spoilers under the cut:

Bringing back Jamie’s romantic feelings for Keeley feels like backsliding. I gave it a pass in s2 because it was just a one-time confession that went nowhere, but…I didn’t like it being continued. That should’ve been a dropped thread (or resolved with him and Keeley talking things out and him backing off because the relationship was never good for either of them)

The way the game played out was perfect. Richmond getting 2nd but not 1st was nice too—sometimes things don’t always go exactly how we want them, but even the small victories still count. Loved every minute of it…especially Rupert getting hoisted by his own petard! Pride goeth before the fall!

Nate’s overall arc has been great in most places and strange in three: his tenure at West Ham was underdeveloped (we don’t get to see him of him and his team, and we don’t know why he left), his relationship with Jade is…fine but I still wish they’d created a new character if they wanted him to have a girlfriend (yeah I still don’t like her that much, sorry), and the animosity between him and the team never got resolved from either side (why did they suddenly stop hating him? Why did he suddenly forgive them for the way they bullied him before? There was no discussion of any of it!)

I’m fine with Tedbecca not being endgame, and I didn’t really expect it (and tbh, the tease of Rebecca and Amsterdam Guy at the end is...fine, they’re cute, they just feel a bit random and tacked-on). I will say, though, that Rebecca staying with the team seemed a bit bizarre after how determined she was to leave...I’m sure she cared about them, but we never really got to see much of that, compared to them and Ted. If anything, it would make more sense for her to leave and him to stay (or for both of them to leave or stay)

I’m horrified by how Beard and Jane are continuously being pushed as this loving relationship. She hasn’t changed, she’s still toxic/abusive, but Beard stays for her, and she’s still painted as his loving girlfriend. It’s nauseating (tho this isn’t the only relationship I’ve had a problem with in Ted Lasso, just the most egregious one because of how long it’s been going on) AND THEY GET MARRIED?? THEY’RE THE ONLY SHIP TO GET A CANON ENDGAME?? I’m gonna scream wtf this is infuriating

“It’s not about me. It never was” AHHHH

YESSS ROY TAKING OVER TED’S POSITION I KNEW IT I LOVE IT AHHHH (also to those who said it was gonna be Nate…he hasn’t been back at AFC Richmond long enough)

…I don’t know how I feel about Jamie and his dad at the end there. I know he was able to move on for his own sake, but…why are they civil and on good terms now?? Is this weird to anyone else, because it’s definitely weird to me

Roy’s getting therapy! Good for him

The mended believe sign taped up! Love that

It’s sweet that Ted now gets to use his coaching tips on Henry, but…although I knew this ending was coming, it feels a little off. I’m not sure how to describe it. He kinda just...feels like he’s back in the same spot he was in s1, in a way

[here-there-everyfuckenwhere]

I’ve said this before and I’m sure I’ll say it a million more times but; the pressroom scene in the pilot is one of my favourite scenes in the entire series.

It is a great scene and a great lil sneak-peak into what the rest of the show will be like for a multitude of reasons (ie; it’s one of the first glimpses into Ted’s struggles with anxiety/panic attacks, it’s obviously the first time we meet Trent, it’s honestly the scene that made me fall in love with Rebecca Welton even though her motives were a bit iffy back then, there’s some cute lil Beard/Ted moments ect.)

But I think possibly the BEST detail of this scene is one that I didn’t notice on my first watch of the show, nor my second or even third rewatch;

When Rebecca gives her whole speech about the “profound mediocrity” under “the stewardship of the previous owner”, the camera sorta lingers on the embarrassed looking faces of all these journalists who are all looking down awkwardly, except for Trent, who’s literally looking around the room with the biggest, most impressed smile. Like. He knows what Rebecca is referring to. He knows damn well that this sport is in the chokehold of the mediocre boysclub and he’s just as goddamn sick of it as she is.

This may or may not be a popular opinion but my own personal headcanon is that Trent is gay, and tbh I think he has dealt with sooo much bullshit homophobia and witnessed all this sexism and toxic masculinity first-hand. From his coworkers, other press outlets, players/coaches/people actually in the sport, not to mention the fans. The very same people that were tearing Rebecca to shreds every single day. He knows exactly what she’s talking about, and he’s silently rejoicing that she’s finally calling them out on their bullshit.

And, knowing what we know about Trent leaving The Independent in the finale of season 2.. idk... I just feel like it’s related? I know we all joke about Trent being some sort of walking disaster who makes this impulsive decision to leak his source and then locks himself out of his car either because he’s secretly a messy person or because he’s secretly pining for Ted, but tbh... I really don’t think Trent IS an impulsive person. I think he’s a deep thinker. I don’t think he just.. does things. Everything he does is calculated. Everything he says has been thought through. And idk. I think Rebecca finally calling all this bullshit behaviour out, right in front of these bloodsucking journalists who were ruining her life at the time , was a total wake-up call for him. I think that is the moment that Trent starts thinking of finding “something deeper”. I think that is the moment when Trent really starts becoming Trent Crimm, Independent.

One thing that has always baffled me about the finale is.. if Trent was so hellbent on toppling his career, if he had thrown all journalistic integrity to the wind out of love respect for Ted then.. why did he even print the story at all? Why didn’t he just tell Nate to get lost and hand in his letter of resignation..?

A lot of people say that it’s because it was only a matter of time before someone else wrote a story on it, and a journalist who perhaps didn’t know Ted the way Trent does wouldn’t have been so kind to him in the article but I think the main reason why Trent went to print with it, even though he understood he was violating any and all trust he had built up with Ted up until that point, was because deep down he wanted so badly to shake-up that culture in the pressroom. He wanted Ted specifically to open a conversation about mental health in athletics, and break down that stigma.

[jawsofbalmung]

As forewarned promised, my extremely biased culprit/killer ratings based on nothing but physical attractiveness. Disclaimer: I am gay. Also my idea of who is considered a "true culprit" may be a bit weird so bear with me. Spoilers for all ten games!

Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney:

1. Frank Sahwit: 0/10. You are nothing. His case lasts 5 minutes and he is ugly. I am not any more endeared seeing him in aai2.

2. Redd White: 2/10. Only gets a 2 because a friend told me about him a long time ago and I thought he was more of a major character and that he would become a blorbo. I was wrong, but I feel kinda bad for being wrong.

3. Dee Vasquez: 4/10. Woman, but pretty cool. Has the mafia on her side, so that's a plus.

4. Yogi Yanni: -10/10. Gross old man.

5. Manfred von Karma: -50000/10. Fuck you die.

6. Jake Marshall: 5/10. Cowboy if you're into that, but I'm personally not that much.

7. Damon Gant: -1/10. Not as bad of an old man as you could've been.

Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney 2: Justice for All:

1. Richard Wellington: 6.5/10. Pretty boy. Cool ringtone. Could be hotter.

2. Mimi Miney: 4/10. Woman. Not very memorable, but cute anyway.

3. Morgan Fey: 1/10. Old woman.

4. Acro: 6.5/10. Would like him better with his hair down, but he's literally the only aa character in a wheelchair and I like him.

5. Matt Engarde: 8/10. FINALLY a hot villain. Very, very cute before he goes evil, but gets worse when he drops his facade I think tbh.

6. Shelley DeKiller: 2/10. Again could be a worse old man, and I saw cool fanart of him once.

Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney 3: Trials and Tribulations

1. Dahlia Hawthorne: 6/10. Woman, but I love her. If you're into high femmes, that's the one for you.

2. Luke Atmey: 2/10. Looks like Spamton Deltarune.

3. Ron Delite: 7/10. Adorable twink.

4. Fiero Tigre: 4/10. Smh the original is always better than the bootleg.

5. Viola Cadaverini: 4/10. Woman. Really skinny. Not much to say.

6. Godot: 9/10. You KNOW my mans is getting a high score <3

Apollo Justice Ace Attorney:

1. Kristoph Gavin: 9273897/10 AAAAAAA

2. Alita Tiala: 4/10. Another high femme woman.

3. Daryan Crescend: 4/10. Could be hotter if his hair wasn't Like That.

4. Valant Gramarye: 3/10. Could be a hotter old man.

Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles Edgeworth:

1. Jacques Portsman: 3/10. Major Eh vibes from this guy.

2. Cammy Meele: 4/10. Another kinda cute but not that memorable woman.

3. Lance Amano: 5/10. Femme. Not much else to say. I like his hair.

4. Ernest Amano: 0/10. Yeah. Old man.

5. Callisto Yew: 5/10. Another high femme woman, I think her sprites are cute tho.

6. Quercus Alba: -10/10. Gross old man.

Ace Attorney Investigations 2: Prosecutor's Path:

1. Horace Knightley: -100/10. Nasty.

2. Patricia Roland: 3.5/10. Woman. Her fox is the best part of her.

3. Dane Gustavia: 5.5/10. Really cool design but not my type. His song is sick tho.

4. Blaise Debeste: -10000/10. Nasty gross man with a terrible beard. Nasty.

5. Simon Keyes: 8.5/10. LOVE him. I am not immune to a sexy clown. Sorta awkward but cute before, but letting his hair down really did it for me.

Ace Attorney: Dual Destinies:

1. Ted Tonate: -1/10. Gross.

2. Florent L'Belle: 2/10. Ehhh.

3. Aristotle Means: -50/10. He scares me.

4. Bobby Fullbright: 3/10. I want him to be hot so bad. I call him Midbright.

5. Aura Blackquill: 6/10. I like her!! Her hair is stupid tho.

6. Marlon Rimes: 2.5/10. Extremely grossly skinny pre-transformation, weirdly buff post-transformation.

The Great Ace Attorney: Adventures:

1. Jezaille Brett/Asa Shinn: 4/10. I love her swan hat.

2. Magnus McGuilded: -500/10. He makes me SO uncomfortable to look at.

3. Ashley Greydon: 8/10. I like him. Weirdo twink. <3

Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice:

1. Pees'lubn Andistan'dhin: 2/10. He looks like my stepdad. No thanks.

2. Roger Retinz: 3/10. Robert Downey Jr. That's all I have to say.

3. Tahrust Inmee: 2/10. Sorry not into the skinny bald thing going on. He's a good man tho.

4. Beh'leeb Inmee: 4/10. Plain, but not bad woman.

5. Geiru Toneido: 5/10. The big one. Personally I do not have a bad case of clussy fever, but her design is cute! She reminds me of Pinkie Pie.

6. Ga'ran Sigatar Khura'in: 3/10. Her evil design unnerves me. She's overall just pretty mid of a villain.

7. Pierce Nichody: 9.5/10. Bro.... When he brings out the mask and the scalpel I can't handle it.... I was hoping he would be a villain from the beginning because I knew it would be hot if he was....

The Great Ace Attorney 2: Resolve:

1. Raiten Menimemo: 7/10. Kind of a twunk. Reblog.

2. William Shamspeare: 2/10. I appreciate the commitment but not for me thanks.

3. Olive Green: 4/10. Woman, but she's cute!

4. Enoch Drebber: 8/10. Auughh.

5. Courtney Sithe: 8/10. Hottest woman. Almost converted me.

6. Seishiro Jigoku: 5.5/10. Could be hotter if he didn't look like hipster Rasputin.

7. Mael Stronghart: 9/10. How did this happen to me. I did not like him before but now I do. What happened.

[stonesandswords]

002: Ted and/or Jamie (or choose your own!)

I shall attempt both!

Ted

How I feel about this character: 

I adore his optimism, even if it can be a detriment to himself at times. He went through something severely traumatic and, while we don't know a lot about his young adult life, he turned around and chose goodness and kindness despite all the hardship he went through. I think there is so much genuine love and care in his lil midwestern heart and it really does make me want to be more like that.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: 

Rebecca, Sharon, and Trent are rotating around in my brain. They all have unique but interesting personal dynamics with Ted that I think are fun!

My non-romantic OTP for this character: 

Beard is my go-to, the two of them have clearly grown through a lot together and have been friends for what I'm assuming is decades. Although Higgins is definitely creeping up there in my platonic OTP for Ted.

My unpopular opinion about this character:

I don't think he should go back to Kansas. I think that Henry should move to the UK, and possibly Michelle with him. Ted has had two really difficult events in his life that involved the breaking up of his family and I would hate to see him lose his AFC Richmond family like that too. I know it would be a big uproot in Henry's life but I think that he's young enough that he could still have a positive experience making friends as he grows up in London.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

I would like to know more about why Jamie's in Ted's panic attacks! I know we have a whole third season for it to be explored but I'm just so intensely curious about it.

my OTP:

TedBecca is pretty up there! I know that's a divisive answer but I really think that they have this deep, unknown understanding of each other that not even the other canon relationships have. I don't think they'll end up together, definitely an "in another life relationship".

my cross over ship:

I don't know why but I think Ted and Jessica Day from New Girl would get along absolutely swimmingly. They both have upbeat, optimistic personalities and are so extremely supportive of the people they love and care about.

a headcanon fact:

Honestly, I don't really have any headcanons about Ted. I think there are many surprises in store with him that I'm just enjoying seeing whatever the writers throw at us about him.

Jamie

How I feel about this character:

This is my sweet baby girl and I love him so much. I probably project myself onto his character more than any other character because of similarities I've had in my life with my own parents in parallel to his dad. Despite how talented he is and how far he's come, I don't think he's really had the chance to truly and authentically be himself.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: 

Jamie is the character I ship with the most people 🤣.

Keeley, Dani, Isaac, Sam, Colin, and Jan. Just to name a couple LOL

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

Roy or Ted tbh. I think they are such great mentor/father/brother figures for Jamie. I think they really push Jamie in different ways to grow. Roy makes Jamie look into himself and stand up for himself and Ted makes Jamie really learn to care about and lean on the people around him, among many other things for both.

My unpopular opinion about this character: 

I don't know if this one is super unpopular but it's felt unpopular to me, but I think that Jamie is an inexperienced person. This ranges from everything from relationships, feelings, sex, travel, and everything in between. I don't think he had a lot growing up and was left to his own devices a lot. I think he's really good at "faking it until he makes it" but ultimately when faced with the actual truth of things, he just doesn't seem experienced in life all that much.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

I really want to know more about Jamie's mom! She was brought up once really and that was in the 1x6 Two Aces episode. I would either like to meet her in season 3 or at least get a bigger picture idea of the impact she had on Jamie's life.

my OTP:

Probably Jamie x Dani, mostly 'cause that's the ship that I do talk to people about the most, so it's the one I have the most ideas about 🤣 but really if someone talks to me about another ship enough, that could probably make it's way up there 🤣

my cross over ship:

This is mostly a joke ship lol but Winston from New Girl. I love that Winston is a v confident person while living his best oddball life and it would be fun for him to bring more of that out in Jamie because I want Jamie to have his little oddball moments with no shame. But mostly I want the two of them rocking bird shirts together.

a headcanon fact:

I think Jamie really likes to feel like he's in complete control, in line with his "prick of all pricks" personality. But I think it stems from feeling like he had no control in the way he grew up or in his relationship with his dad. That his need to be in control comes from a deeply rooted place of insecurity, distrust, and scaredness.

send me a character(s) or ship(s)

[showyoumyfavoriteobsession]

Well that all made me cry a whole bunch! Some thoughts:

For as much as the show likes to buck sitcom stereotypes, I also think they make good decisions in not having crazy plot twists all over the place. None of the plot points in the episode were unexpected, but they were executed well and the way they play out is the fun part. (Personally, I hate getting spoiled for shows but I also hate the "spoiler culture" of thinking that everything has to be impossible to guess all the time. It doesn't really matter if I'm right or not in the end, I just want it to make sense for the show y’know?)

I thought the cold open encapsulated surprisingly well the difference between the support from your friends and loved ones and the "support" that people you don't know try to offer you. I wish we had heard Ted talk a little more about it at the press conference, but it was more important that we heard him talk to the team about it and that was a great scene.

When Sam finished talking to his dad and saw kids wearing his jersey!! And putting black tape over the Dubai Air logo!! When I tell you I sobbed like a baby

(Side note I hope Sam's dad makes an appearance at some point next season, I think it would be really cute)

(AND Sam bringing another bit of his home to London! I'm excited for team dinners at his restaurant)

Nate, Nate, Nate. Again, none of how this played out was exactly unexpected, but I thought the completion of his heel turn was really well done. Nick Mohammed's been quietly crushing it all season, and he really knocked it out of the park with this episode. He's clearly hurting a lot (whether it's justified or not), and I think if he had decided in this episode to suddenly turn back around and rejoin the team it would have felt unearned. He feels like he's being wronged, and that he's owed an apology and recognition from Ted, and all that resentment is what's been fueling him throughout the season. It really exploded in this episode with the confrontation with Ted, but he's going to need more time to figure out where he really stands. I'm excited to see how he changes in season 3. (Although not enjoying all the takes about how he's an irredeemable monster who we can never trust again. He tried to do basically what Rebecca was doing in season 1, his arc is tying in his self-esteem issues, his sense of masculinity, and his own traumatic past, and it feels like most people aren't extending anywhere near the same understanding and it sucks.)

This episode really fed my rarepair/multishipper heart. Roy/Jamie? Ted/Beard? Keeley/Rebecca? Just the littlest crumbs of Ted/Rebecca??

(I'm not personally a fan of Ted/Trent but. good lord that last scene. I feel like Trent was supposed to be kind of a sleazy journalist to start but his vibes were just too powerful)

This show sure loves a callback huh? I love them too, but it was kind of a lot in this episode tbh.

If there's one thing I feel sure of in this show, it's that Roy and Keeley will eventually be fine. I won't say there's *no* tension, because they like to surprise us, but I can't get too worked up over the possibility that they're going to break up or anything for any significant amount of time.

I was honestly expecting this episode to be a lot bleaker, I'm glad it mostly resolved in a positive direction. I don't know how I'll survive the wait for season 3 (afaik they haven't started filming yet)

[typinggently]

Okay, but, Incubus!Billy. That's it, that's the Ted Talk.

Thank you so much for this Ted Talk, it was incredibly inspiring!! 💛💛

I mean…When I tell you that I’ve been thinking about this all day…

In total, I ended up with three possible scenarios for that concept and they are as following:

1) Renaissance Setting

Now. Billy as a good Incubus, being send to seduce some sweet, god-fearing priest. However. He arrives at the destination and has a cartoon moment where he looks at the priest and just…slowly lets his gaze wander to the guy standing right next to him. And that’s how Billy decides that hey, you know what? Fuck that priest. He’s going to seduce this guy instead.

Which is ridiculous, tbh, because Frank’s a mercenary and those guys usually don’t need much seduction to go to hell. But Billy’s a simple Demon, he wants to have some fun now and then, alright? Let him have this!

Now the reason why I was so captivated by this is mostly the aesthetics. I have a whole fic planned out for a Renaissance AU for these two and while thinking about this, I remembered once more why I’m so into that concept. Because the fashion…the Lööks…Unparalleled.

Billy is an Incubus, after all, so he’s extremely alluring, his presence is very physical. There’s his seductive attire, the pearl earrings, the dark velvet, the trim waist and high collar, the lace, the elegant hands, the pale throat. You want to touch him to feel the material of his clothes, the embroidery, the lace. The shimmer of silk and pearls attracts the eye, he has his melodic voice, there’s that scent of wood and roses and thyme… It’s just a lot. He’s gorgeous. He’s incredibly seductive.

I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Especially since there’s that contrast with Frank, who’s got his beard, the broad shoulders, the big hands…!!!

(And here we have that demonic seduction I love so, so, so much. The gothic eroticism, the dark-sensual dreams. Frank waking up, hot and quivering, feeling drained and still filled with a dreadful anticipation. Trying to spot the moving shapes in the dark corner of the room, where Billy is licking his lips, waiting for him to fall asleep again. There is a nuance to superstitious eroticism that just…can’t be beat imo. The strange dread, the subconscious knowledge that it’s Billy who’s doing this to him, but also that deep, undeniable desire to let him do it. I…I could go on. It’s a great concept, I think)

2. Demon AU

I have this other AU I love very much and for which I have two drabbles which you can find here. The concept is super simple: Sometime in the Fin de Siècle, Billy decides that hey, he’d like eternal youth, actually? And thus he summons a Demon who then is dumb (and probably horny) enough to agree to bind them together via a contract.

For this…I was thinking… How fun it would be if Frank was his Demon self, just trying to do his job and kill people and cause suffering, but Billy, Incubus, for some reason decided that he’d much rather fuck him than humans, so he follows him around. Centuries of shenanigans where Frank tries to cause mayhem while his targets are all way too busy drooling over Billy, who in turn does the “seductively lying on the floor watching Frank work” pose.

I have a terrible thing for Demon!Frank (and I’m working on expanding those drabbles, maybe adding to the story etc) and the concept of him with his almost-human self, all power and sulphur and molten void, countless teeth and black eyes, being followed by Billy, certified Sex Demon, who spends his days looking hot and making Frank’s life difficult.. Idk that concept speaks to me. Also, it’s fun since that way, Billy wouldn’t actually be in charge? He can’t access Frank’s energy, since he’s not human, so he can’t weaken him. And honestly? Demon vs Incubus isn’t exactly a fair fight.

(Frank snapping now and then and absolutely destroying Billy… Raw Demon strength, heat and passion and violence, his claws sunk into Billy’s throat and teeth bared…Billy, Immortal, with his eyes rolling back, drunk on pleasure, absolutely fucked up…We all know he likes it a little rough, and it doesn’t get much rougher than a pissed off demon. Very counter-productive of Frank, tbh, because even IF Billy could feel the damage Frank is capable of doing (bed’s a mess. In shreds. In pieces. Unusable), does Frank really think he’d leave? After that??

I say Frank’s a bit of an idiot, and he’s lying to himself (so like, nothing new) because he was THERE and he made SURE that Billy came until he couldn’t form words anymore (which is a feat, considering he’s a, you know, Sex Demon, and fucking is like. His job.). Like? What did he expect? For Billy to go “alright, that was fun, bye”?! Fool.

3. Army Days

Sure, Renaissance is extremely fun, but I also ended up thinking about just regular old Frank? In the Army? Not knowing his best friend is a Sex Demon?

And I think Billy, Très Fucked Up, just enjoys violence and death, since it’s close to passion etc etc, so he just hangs around in armies and close to war zones. Just an explanation of why he’s there to begin with.

But now the fun part. Renaissance AU would be interesting because Frank would still be superstitious enough to suspect that the beautiful man with the pearly teeth is harming him. But present-day Frank? He’d have no idea. And he can’t even rely on his gut, because no matter whether it’s Renaissance or Modern Day – Frank wants Billy. He appreciates his beauty, he’d fuck him to pieces given the chance.

So Modern Frank really has no way of knowing that Billy is actively harming him. Like, sure, he has incredibly intense wet dreams and he feels uneasy and knackered when he wakes up, but like. If you’re in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by guys, you might start having those thoughts. No need to suspect blasphemous powers behind it, it’s not all that weird.

What is weird, of course, is that those dreams are so incredibly realistic, and that they’re all, without exception, about Billy. And Frank has a good amount of guilt over that, since it’s not fair to look at his friend in that way just because there are no girls around and he’s so painfully pretty. So I imagine he throughout the day tries to prove to himself that he’s a good guy who doesn’t objectivity his gorgeous best friend, but no can do. Once he’s asleep, he’s back in that weird velvet darkness with Billy and his beautiful eyes, his soft mouth, his sharp-hot scent. And since it’s a dream, he’ll be free to touch him, pull him in, kiss him. Billy’s hands in his hair and his voice, melodic-sweet, in his ear – “I’ll eat you up.”

-

Honestly, truly – I’m so obsessed w that whole concept. I can’t stop thinking about it. Brain broken, only Incubus Billy. There’s just something about that selfish hunger that just fits him so well? Desire and consumption and sensuality. I just. [SCREAM]. You know??

Also in all of those scenarios, Frank would at some point be actually lucid while they fuck and in each of these scenarios, Billy is incredibly smug about it. You know, the ‘laughter turning into hitched moans’ kind of smug, the one that melts into overwhelming pleasure at some point, when that first self-satisfied realisation that Frank wants him is followed by the realisation that Frank is good. Not sure how Frank would make it out alive and immortal in 1)&3), but…he’s got to. Billy simply wouldn’t let him go. You don’t get fucked this well only to let the guy die.

Alright, I’m forcefully stopping myself now before this gets too long but…honestly…thank you so much for this message…My brain is in shambles. Succubus Billy Hours 24/7.

[phlipshea]

hi  im  still  not  over  how  revolutionary  the  french  were  with  their  take  on  philip/lukas and here’s my ted talk

they  had  a  gay  couple  as  lead  protagonists

they  didn’t  kill  either  of  them

they  didn’t  have  a  cheating  plot  /  a  girl  as  a  beard  (  THAT NEVER HAPPENS  )   

no  toxic  masculinity  driving  the  internal  homophobia

no  violence  resulting  from  the  internal  homophobia  or at all,  even  though  his  friend  encouraged  him  to  fight -- and  instead  he  pushed  the  friend  and  calmly  walked  off  with  philip,  even though he was mad at him at the time.  Like  yeah,  he  called  Philip  a  loser  while  he  walked  off,  but  it  wasn’t  bad,  it  was  something  that  even  friends  would  do  if  they  were  mad. It  wasn’t  claiming  he  was  a  fucking  stalker  :/

Lucas  didn’t  utter  a  single  homophobic  comment  or  slur  (  all  he  did  was  press  on  he  wasn’t  gay  like  it  was  a  casual  fact lmao  no  boy  )

There  was  still  no  forcing  someone  out  of  the  closet,  just  circumstances  that  built  up  to  a  point  they  couldn’t  not  give  their  testimony.

the gay couple  was  not  fetishized  anyway  or  set  up  to  be.  It  was  very  much  emotionally  based,  which  allowed  audiences  to  separate  lust  from  genuine  love.  (  Also  it  was  a  good  move  in  all  ways,  especially  as  minors )

how  it’s  better  than  USA’s

All of the above!!!!

No  emotional  manipulation  or  toxic  qualities  like  eyewitness’  text-book  definition  of  a  toxic  relationship  (  if  you  like  me,  you’ll  do  this  /  i’m   going  to  use  the  fact  you  like  me  to  my  advantage )

Besides  a  moment  of  panic  and  pettiness  ( whiCH WAS ACTUALLY VALID TBH IN THIS SPECIFIC TAKE ),   there  was  no  lying  to  bring  the  other  person  down.  

There  was  logical  reasonings  in  the  irrational

They  didn’t  exploit  any  girls  for  the  sake  of  proving  they  weren’t  gay.  Just  a  moment  of  pettiness  where  Lucas  kissed  a  girl  to  make  Yan  mad.  And  again,  they  actually  managed  to  make  Lucas’  pettiness  valid  in  this  one  because  the  stakes  weren’t  that  high --  but  still  making  Yan  equally  valid  with  the  circumstances  that  lead  his  thought  process  to  acting  on  his  own  fear.

There  was  no  possessive  behavior,  just  absolute  love.  (  I’m  going  to  give  Helen  the  gun  because  you can’t leave, you’re mine.   Instead,  it  was  ‘I  feel  really  bad  and  going  to  constantly  APOLOGIZE  for  being  an  asshole,  I  didn’t  realize  just  how  bad  it  affected  you.  I’m  so  sorry  and  I  care  about  you  and  will  explain  all  my  intentions  that  aren’t  excuses )

Lucas  never  pushed  Philip  away  at  school,   but  calmly  engaged  in  private  conversations  while  walking  with  him  in  the  hall  or  to  the  side  where  people  saw  them.  He  didn’t   trash  Philip  afterwards  to  cover  up  why  he  was  doing  that.  It  was  a  very  much  ‘mind your business.’

He  actually  listened  to  Philip  when  he  expressed  his  panic,  like  believing  him  when  he  accused  someone  of  something.  He  only  took  his  anger  out  on  people  who  deserved  it  -- like  people  blackmailing  him.  Fucking  valid!!  Also,  as  a  reaction  to  hearing/seeing  the  killer,  his  first  instinct  was  to  protect  Philip  and  get  him  far  away -- rather  than  telling  him  to  get  out  and  not  draw  the  killer  to  himself.  Tally  mark  of  Lucas  saving  his  life  is  two.  It  would  have  been  three  but  he  wasn’t  fast  enough  to  take  credit  for  something  else,  but  he  tried.  HE TRIED!!!   lIKE  HE HEARD  PHILIP  WAS  MISSING  AND  WENT  OUT  OF  HIS  WAY  TO  LOOK  EVERYWHERE  INCLUDING  SKETCHY  PLACES

The  only  time  he  accused  Philip  of  lying  was  valid  because  like............Philip was going  to  do  what  he  said  he  did,  had  Lucas  not  shown  up. ( lmao )

That  scene  where  he  just  ‘theyre  gonna  find  out  anyway’  and  held  Philip’s  hand  while  an  FBI  agent  was  following  him,  and  proceeded  to  kiss  him  in  front  of  him  ( lmao )

Lucas  was  genuinely  charming??? He  was  funny,  actually  smart,  admirable  in  his  talent  because  he  was  confident  and  showing  off  but  it  was  also  clear  he  just  really  loved  what  he  was  doing,  and  like...when  philip  kissed  him  he  just  laughed  and  was  like “what are you doing?”  and  it  was......dare i  say....cute?  It  wasn’t  to  make  philip  feel  bad  about  himself,  but  lead  into  him  just  teasing  him  and  kissing  him  first  out  of  a  “what  would  you  do  if  I  was  a  girl?”  proceeded  by  this  fucker  being  cocky  as  fuck,  even  though  its  fucking  clear  as  day  he’s  gay  and  had  never  wanted  to  kiss  a  girl --  it  was  just  him........being.........that  way.  ( I  love  him  ).   when  he  lied  it  didn’t  effect  anyone  else,  he  protected  people,  he  used  1  girl  to  make  philip  jealous  and  that  girl  was  creepy  af  and  i  dont  care  for  her.  

  I  couldn’t  buy  philip  being  in  loved  with   USA   LUKAS  and  headcanon  he  just  had  survivor’s  guilt  and  just.........oof....that  boy.   It  was  a  lot  more  believable  this  round.

anyway.  I’m  emotional  because  I  didn’t  get  to  see  my  boy  in  a  season  2  where  he  would  have  had  development,   but  I  got  something  so much better.   

[belasso-archive]

hi i just wanted to come in here and say that i love you very much. you are truly the ted to my beard, and i am so unbelievably happy and glad that i've met you. you are one of the sweetest and kindest people i've met here, not to mention one of the most talented. every single thought you have about ted is SO in character, it makes me wonder if you're actually mr. sudeikis himself tbh. you love your characters so much, and the passion you have is so evident and pure...i am so happy to be your friend <3 you're SO GREAT. and SO NICE. <33333

no bc are u actually trying to get me to cry????? because if that’s what you’re trying to do, it’s working. i literally love you SO MUCH, earth!!!! LIKE WHAT THE HECK. like meeting you, and plotting with you, and just chatting with you has been such a fucking delight!!!! like you literally are the beard to my ted, the peanut butter to my jelly, like!!!! you’re such a sweetheart, and so talented, and so amazing, and i’m so lucky to know you, and write with you, and listen to you talk about beard, bc u truly are the only person with rights to speak about beard. this was so sweet 😭😭😭 okay i’m done gushing for now. I LOVE YOU