#i want to be more unhinged about my ocs but i don’t know where to start tbh

[wordstome]

Last night I did what I always do when I can’t fall asleep: think about fictional men. Here’s a list of wonderful stories written by incredibly talented people who have helped me think about fictional men by providing the most delicious playgrounds.

In the interest of keeping my recommendations brief, I'm going to talk about what I liked about the fic instead of summarizing what it's about. To know what it's actually about you're just gonna have to click through and read the fic <3

(and just in case anybody's gotten lost, this is all COD, mostly modern MW)

✦ complete ║ ➠ ongoing

König

✦Just Friends by @kneelingshadowsalome Salome is so good at capturing a very unique interplay between König’s social awkwardness and his deep, dark, nasty inclinations. He’s so feral and enjoyable to read, and the sheer force of his desire for Engel is downright intoxicating. I find it difficult to describe how much of an impact Just Friends has had on me and my portrayal of König, to be honest. There's a reason why three of Salome's fics are on this rec list.

✦Fatum Nos Iungebit by kneelingshadowsalome Five words. König with his cock out. That's it. Okay, but in all seriousness, I love his character applied to this setting. All the raw visceral violence a König could ever want, a pretty little lady in his bed—he's so boyish and happy in this au it brings me such joy. The way their relationship between him and Fee develops is so natural and so sweet. Please for the love of God read this.

➠Cat/Mouse/Den by @papaver-decervicatus The chase. The pursuit. The adrenaline when Mouse dances out of König's reach once more. I'm a little biased because I adore Julius and Jenny (I could call her Lucretia but the double J names make me giggle) as ocs already, but CMD is so, so well written. The tension, the flirting, the scene where he catches her falling out of the tree?! As I said in a reblog, I shrieked. You know when you're reading something that's so good you want to bite down on it and shake like a dog with a toy? (No? Just me?) That's how I feel about CMD.

➠Anything by @darklordofthesimp Anything, in only 7 chapters (they are hefty, don’t get me wrong), has turned König and Birdy’s dynamic from “THIS MOTHERFUCKER HAS IRREVERSIBLY SCARRED MY BODY AND MY BRAIN, AND I CANNOT TRUST HIM” to “these two are going to get married someday”. (author if you’re reading this, I say that not as an expectation or prediction, but as a vibe reading.) This one is for the hurt/comfort girlies. Also, shoutout to all the other stories set in the Anything-verse. Sunshine and Ghost are just soooo *grips my hand in a fist so hard it shakes*

➠If you need to be mean by @gremlingottoosilly This mostly serves as a blanket recommendation for all of Gremlin’s fics. I found If you need to be mean, and then visiting Gremlin’s author page was like opening a treasure chest. Want to be König’s pampered, (unwilling) little housewife? That’s If you need to be mean. Want a harem fic with almost all of the COD MW men? Gremlin has two, both with their own little spin to keep it fun. Do you want König to keep you in his basement or hunt you down as a serial killer? Gremlin's got it. Monsterfucker? Gremlin has that too. Special shoutout goes to 1295 kilometers. I think about fucking König on a train a lot now.

➠Break my mind by @kaiasdevotion (kaiasown on ao3) There’s no way around this. This fic has the most unhinged, kinky, downright dangerous smut I’ve read in the cod fandom so far (positive). Just Friends König is the metric by which I judge all other Königs’ nastiness, and Break my mind König is tipping so hard on the “unhinged horny violent freak (affectionate)” end of the scale he’s about to fall off. I don't know if you guys have noticed, but I've developed a taste for writing/reading from König's perspective, and he's so chillingly deranged in the most controlled way possible during the chapters from his pov. Incredible writing. Chefs kiss.

✦Experimental by @uhohdad (surgeoninspace on ao3) Alright, enough of just König being nasty. He is still nasty in this one, but he’s not the only one who gets to have a little fun and be a total creep. Our little scientist here is a grade A pervert, and I was delighted the whole way through. The most important thing I need in a fic is suspension of disbelief, and Experimental takes an unrealistic, maybe a little bit silly situation and makes it so believable. Everybody reacts the way you would expect them to, even if the scenario they're in is A Lot.

➠Little Mouse and Rotes Madchen by @sprout-fics I'm combining the recommendation for these two because while they are both very much distinct, unique fics, I love them the same way. Sprout is such an engaging writer, and the internal dialogue of her characters is so well done. It reveals their personality, motivations, and internal conflicts without being overly expository. Do you guys remember that post I put on the König bible about instant obsession? It's this inexorable attraction borne from obsession that sticks me to Little Mouse like a glue trap. (Is that too morbid?)

✦Hot in Sarajevo by @50cal-fullauto Rags' König characterization post is on my Königcore bible, for very good reason. They get it. König is a feral dog forced to live as a man and loves like a total maniac, emotionally and sexually. I marked Hot in Sarajevo as complete but I don't know how many parts there are going to be, and frankly, I do want more. However, if you're going to only read one part (which. why would you do that??? read both.) I recommend the second part. I want to write love like that. Goddamn.

Ghost

Yeah, this list is a little bare bones right now. I'm gonna get back to it, I promise.

✦Anhedonia by kneelingshadowsalome The way. Salome takes the "I would take a bullet for him but he's so cold to me" premise and then flips it entirely on its head for the second part is so important to me. The way Simon craves the reader is like human catnip. I reread this fic all the time.

Keegan

✦For the Weak and Weary by @halcyone-of-the-sea Read this if you want to believe in true love. That's all. Go on now.

Multiple

✦Easy by @danibee33 When people say "I wish this were a book!" about fanfiction, they usually mean it in a "this is good enough to be published by the traditional publishing industry" way. When I say I want Easy (and Diablesa) to be a book, I mean it in a "I want to get this story bound in a beautiful ass cover and keep it on a shelf so I can take it down and reread it whenever I want" way. I don't want the traditional publishing industry to get their claws in this, because it's perfect as it is. This fic is so wild and fun, and the character moments are so special and well done. Do yourself a favor and savor this one.

➠@ghouljams's entire blog [masterlist] "What do you mean someone's entire blog" YOU HEARD ME. Those aus are some good shit. Good characterization, delicious premises, love the group effort of it all. To absolutely nobody's surprise, my favorite couple is König and Bee from the cowboy au (ditzy but well-meaning and competent in her own way woman x big strong man who is obsessed with her and maybe also creeping on her, my beloved), but I also have a fondness for Ghost and Die from demon darlings au. Trust me on this one. Dig into those masterlists babey.

[spearxwind]

Some of those dragons in your recent drawing don’t have any other posts in their tags, could you introduce a few if it’s not spoilery?

Yeah absolutely!! I'll talk about all of them >:)

Alex and C, you know em, both of em dragon arena gladiators that eventually fight to escape the crushingly oppressive conditions they found themselves in.

These planes are manned by Soleil (left), who flies an SU-30, and Gala + Reina (right) on an AWACS plane based on the saab Globaleye. Gala is a Human and Reina is a little dragon, either of them can pilot or handle the IFF system interchangeably, though usually Gala is the one who pilots.

Octane, you know him too, reventant died-but-not-really guy, a jetwing of considerable speed. He's a rly nice chill guy even if dying-but-not-really has made him exponentially more unhinged. Infamous in illegal racing. Used to be a part of Lexios' squadron. And on the right, his brother Jarek, infamous for other things. He's a bounty hunter who specializes in other dragons. Has little care for who hires him as long as he's getting paid.

Arcturus is one of the fastest dragons out there, and they are the interceptor for Lexios' squad. A whimsical guy, they just like to Go Really Fast but got roped into service along with Octane bc of their abilities.

Voltaire is the support attacker of the squad. He's a gruff older dragon with a lot of flight experience and a nasty EMP attack.

Lexios, my beloved, absolute showstopper whenever she appears. She's a jetwing based on the XB-70 Valkyrie, with a little bit from the B-52 Stratofortress. She's MEAN AS FUCK, completely unhinged, and super powerful to boot. She's the squad leader, and her squad is the preferred attack hammer of the Dragon Choir. Very probably a war criminal (god forbid women do anything).

Kelan here is the dragon prince of the region, but he genuinely doesnt care about it. He would much rather be flying around the cast and having fun with his friends than to sit at the council and think about war. His father's death left the Council pretty headless and Kelan's attitude and demeanor makes him disliked among them but deeply beloved by his people.

Razor is a one-winged dragon from the cliffsides and part of the raider force in the highlands where the story takes place. He lost one of his wings in the past, though he was never able to fly with them anyways. Outside of canon, Razor is one of my oldest dragon ocs and I wanted to breathe new life into him putting him in this world :) Also, he has a really thick australian accent. This fact is very important.

Rivier is a desert dragon that has also found herself in the highlands through Circumstances(tm). She's also part of the raider force, and has a human rider called Jem who she goes on missions with. She and Razor aren't related by blood but they have grown up together and consider each other siblings.

[tortor-sauce]

18+ POST LOOK AWAY 👹🔞 if you’re not 18+ PLEASE DNI with this post!! 👹🔞

(sketch and drabble and headcanons)

(jel/reth/oc stuff)

GO AWAY LOOK AWAY!!!!! IM WARNING YOU 🔪

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP I CANT EVEN TAG THIS I DONT EVEN WANT PEOPLE TO SEE BUT I HAVE TO SHOW SOMEONE AND TALK ABOUT IT OR I’LL EXPLODE!!!!

i’m too shy to share the whole picture IM SORRY—i just wanted to capture a few headcanons into a single shamelessly horny drawing of the three of them together. also, my thoughts are completely unorganized and this post is mostly just me rambling!

small disclaimer, if you don’t agree with or like my headcanons, that’s totally valid but please don’t tell me so 🙇 i kindly ask you just move on from this post. thank you!

okay. so i feel like both reth and jel are service tops HEAR ME OUT—like, they’re both just a couple of pathetic lover boys who are so head over heels in love with you. the fact they practically always gift you something when you flirt with them in-game (jel gifting silk and reth gifting soup) i feel is their attempts at spoiling you and taking care of you in their own way. they just want to see you happy and make you cum your brains out a thousand times until you can’t think straight anymore 🥺

and in general, i feel jel would love to shower you in compliments and words of praise and practically worship your body. while i feel reth is the type to show you how he feels and relish in watching you come undone with him. but personally 👉👈 i feel jel and reth align more closely as switches because they’re both so.. so soft and need to be spoiled and loved so deeply (no innuendo intended)

with that said, i think jel is a more intimate and passionate lover while reth is a bit more unhinged and rough. that’s not to say jel doesn’t have his sadistic bouts. i feel it stems directly from his obsessive nature and grows into a desire to watch you submit to him and his whims, sort of in a controlling way. but it makes him so happy when you do. the need to know you belong to him, both your heart and body, is honestly really important to him. i actually feel he has control issues due to a number of reasons but that’s a different discussion—💀 and he rewards you so thoroughly for showing him how much you love him. god, the aftercare? he’s so gentle and attentive and treats you like the most precious thing he’s ever held.

more on reth, while not as sadistic, i feel he’s still plenty controlling when he wants to be. the poor man has hardly any control in his day-to-day life and the fact you allow him an ounce of control? over your body of all things? yeah, that shit drives him mad (positive). gets a bit carried away and leaves marks on your body, hickeys, scratches, bruises, the like. but hey, at least it’s a pretty reminder of how much fun you had together. plus, if anyone sees they’ll know you belong to him. but he definitely teases you about it the following days by making sly comments and even running his fingers over the more sensitive marks.

so, in my polycule i envision moments where two will actively spoil the other. so for instance like when maddox and reth want to spoil jel and shower him in the love and affection he deserves, he gets all shy and blushy but relishes in the moment. he pays them back tenfold once they’re finished, but not that same night. maddox and reth make sure he’s completely worn out so he’ll finally get some damn sleep for once. reth is the same in that regard; he gets all shy and blushy but he enjoys being spoiled for once. not having to care about anything or anyone else and focus fully on himself and his pleasure. and the two know this and want to show him how loved he is. lowkey i imagine jel bringing him to tears, crying tears of pleasure and from overstimulation but that may be a personal thing of mine. 💀 and as for maddox? they both know exactly which buttons to push. i imagine them sort of egging each other along. i mentioned earlier i think jel has a sadistic side to him, well i think the same of reth albeit not nearly as prominent. like, the fact he teases and flirts so much could be for a number of reasons, but how lovely it would be if it were only to watch their reactions each time. with that said, maddox happens to be very reactive and discovering that fact in bed, like, awakens something inside of him to tease more, to push as much as maddox will allow him. and yes, he notices the way jel reacts to it too. it only makes him want to tease him for the fact as well 🥴 WHICH is why i drew him with that expression LMAO normally i would’ve imagined him with a much softer and kinder expression but i think he’s quick to lose himself in the throes of pleasure which causes him to act a bit selfish at times. but like i said, i see him as a service top so really his ‘selfish’ moments are him just spoiling maddie and jel and showering their bodies with so much love and attention.

i have so many more thoughts but this post is getting long and i’m getting embarrassed so i’ll stop there for now.

IF YOU READ THIS IM SORRY LOL BUT THANK YOU FOR INDULGING ME///////

[hana-no-seiiki]

Saw that post you made a little bit ago and was hit with an idea (ow)

A yandere that tries so damn hard to hold themselves back from crossing boundaries because while their love is, in fact, incredibly twisted and probably unhinged, they do love their darling. Hearing that Darling never had anyone respect them the way they deserved really grinded their gears. So the Yandere asks for permission before giving hugs, kisses, ect.

Is it out of genuine respect? Is a ploy/plot to gain Darling's affection a bit faster? Up to you, I'm very tired. I'll also let you decide how successful the Yandere is at Not Crossing Boundaries

My yans in general are yans because they have no sense of boundaries, do not care about these boundaries, or expect you to have no boundaries because they have none themselves.

I think the only yans in my roster that will definitely respect that in a direct sort of manner are the Midnight Darling (Yan! College) ones. Purely because the reader there is at the top of the foodchain and they have a system for organization’s sake. Most of them would still stalk you, or ‘feel’ you indirectly by taking your stuff. But if you ever voiced it out, they’ll make sure that no one messes with the lines you’ve set.

That being said, they do expect a reward and will very much coax it out of you if not outright force it if enough time has passed by that they get impatient.

Try not to implicate who didn’t respect your boundaries, unless you want them dead or humiliated to death. Though I do see them hunting your family members down since that’s where stuff like that usually happens eitherway (totally not speaking from personal experience h a h a)

Particularly speaking, Justin (Yan! Jock) is actually the best at keeping his hands to himself. He’s great at adjusting. You just have to not tick him off or intentionally provoke him and he’d basically do whatever you wish. He cares more for how he can serve you rather than how you can reciprocate his feelings.

Amir is also very good at respecting your boundaries. Physically speaking at the very least. He is incredibly bad at verbal boundaries and can easily say something real bad at the worst times, but he does apologize and feels awful afterwards. He does awkwardly hover over you sometimes and is too shy to ask for permission, so you have to read him yourself to know when to ply him with kisses.

The worst for respecting your boundaries would be Yichen (Yan! Himbo)

What are boundaries? You’ve been bros for forever! Friends don’t have boundaries! You guys should always be open to each other! And y’know what he’s been feeling rather pent up lately. Won’t you be a dear and jerk him off as you sit prettily on his lap?

God while his is more innocent in nature, there’s also someone I haven’t written specifically here yet but have been brainrotting in dms w/ @not-a-bot-just-shy . Caterpillar (Yan! Ex Goon/Now-A-Villain) who just doesn’t care entirely. You’re hers whether you like it or not. Who are you to set boundaries when she owns you? Possessions don’t have rights much less should have the ability to say no.

She’s very similar to The Scientist (it’s in the name) who doesn’t even see you as human. Reader in that story is a monster so it makes sense but 🤷‍♂️ i dunno sounds kinda fucked up-

but yeah, a lot of my ocs are crap at it ngl. They’re needy sluts.

[passionateseadruid]

I wonder if the bride actually got along with some of the sins how Luci would react, on one hand yay family getting along with your partner on the other hand he’s jelly

Also after assault that was 100% justified and then some and honestly he should feel grateful for the gift dildos ain’t exactly cheap plus it takes a while to bedazzle shit, not to mention he caused a scene in front of her folks this is just payback dude

I wonder how the sins would react, they probably can’t do much, Ozzie probably wouldn’t approve once he caught wind of the deal being the consent king he is but they have no power over Luci

Ooh interesting callout to Charlie too, the sinners aren’t the only denizens of Hell, maybe she’s attached bc they have a chance and she sees the connection with her mom since Lilith was the OG sinner but what about the rest of her people? Don’t they deserve care too?

I love that Fizz is in her corner. It makes me wonder how her relationship would be with the other hotel members. Maybe an allyship with Alastor over mutual dislike of Lucifer much to his chagrin. I also wonder how she’d bond with Angel. Maybe he recognizes the signs and points them out to an oblivious Charlie before they even meet bc she’s fuming about how awful she is, maybe Husk joins in.

Either way I can’t wait to see how it goes!

I adore this so much.

Firstly, I must say she got the toy from Fizzarolli. He thought it was fucking hilarious, so he just gave it to her for free. Because Fizzarolli is a gay icon, and we Stan him in this household.

Secondly, I feel like she would be very very uncomfortable with Satan just because of the environment she grew up in. Also those two fuck boys (Luci and Satana(intentional)) kind of deserve the hate. I mean there’s literally a whole book on it. Not the point right now.

I’m getting this out of the way right now she absolutely hates Mammon because boo greedy capitalist tomato tomato. The rich ass gets richer and the poor imps suffer, we hate to see it. Also, she’s gonna be fucking pissed when she finds out all the shit he is put Fizz through. (Pfft I had such an unhinged thought. “Love to see Mammon go, hate to watch his fat ass giggle as he walks away.” I’m so sorry.

Beelzebub is interesting because I actually want to do something with her and the hellhounds so I don’t want to give too much away right now and I’ve been planning this since really early on probably like chapter 3 I’d say I’ve been planning what I want to do with a Bee in the hellhounds. So you’ll see more probably chapter 10 I’d say it would’ve been the next chapter but then a comment on ao3 made me kind of switch up my plan.

I will say this her and Ozzies relationship is complicated because on one hand, he’s not even worried about the possibility that Fizzarolli is going to cheat with her because Fizz is gay. On the other hand though, he understands what her being in hell means and it is not good. I just love the little interaction though with Ozzie where he sees the two of them in the pantry and he’s just like “oh OK there’s just having a chat. probably about Lucifer.”

I don’t know that much about Belphegor other than his lower is a lot deeper than what I have been led to believe. He’s just a depressed little guy. (Or is she in the shows case)

Also, I know nothing about Levi because the show hasn’t really told us much about him and I’m just like OK cool I have to write a series about this, so Vivian I’m gonna need a bit more.

I would adore it, though, if Levi and Belphegor actually were just super chill, and the bride just got along splendidly with them that would be great. For now I’m going to focus on the sins. We do know about such as Ozzie, Bee and Mammon. So far she only has somewhat of a good rapport with Ozzie.

Now the Ars Goetia on the other hand, I wanna do so much with them. There’s so much we could explore! There’s 72 cars Goetia, and only one of them was like a knight so I wanna make so many OCs. You have no idea!

As for her relationship with the other hotel guests we’re going to get to that after the wedding so that’ll be probably after I want to say somewhere between chapter 13-15 maybe I’m not totally sure.

at this point it’s pretty clear that it’s non-canon compliant but this does take place like six months before the hotel is established. Then there’s probably going to be a time skip and and and there’s going to be a “queen for a Day” chapter. I am so excited for that I’m gonna be paying homage to tangled the series because Jeremy Jordan plays Varian, and that I thought “ha that’s funny.”

anyway, her relationship with the hotel guests. her and Alastair are going to have a dynamic similar to this video.

Her and angel are basically just her and Fizzarolli again. And you guys know how she was when Renesmee was being mistreated and abused. She is going to be standing up for husk. They homies. They ride or dies. Unfortunately though she’s not going to get to meet Pentious but she’d completely adore him.

[monodramatic-cannibal]

Rules/etc for interacting with my ocs/aus

(finally gonna make one of these. Will be adding onto this list as I think of more points/boundaries. If unsure about something feel free to ask me about stuff, dms are always open as well)

Heres a link to my art request info too. Since a lot of people are requesting for their ocs interacting with mine.

(List under cut)

If asks are open, but request aren't it means you can still ask my ocs/aus things, and I will draw responses. BUT it just means I will not be drawing anything but my ocs/aus!! If I draw anyone interacting with them it will be them interacting with an anon! (moots might be an exception to this, but it's 50/50)

I’m okay with people making fanart/writings of my ocs/aus! I’m also okay with people drawing their ocs/sonas/aus with mine too ^-^! (Please keep it sfw since minors follow my account. If your unsure if I’d be okay with a specific art/writing ask first and I can let you know.) 

I’m okay with people shipping characters with mine (providing it's not a problematic ship, and that it’s a ship between adults). I’m also okay with self-shipping with my characters ^-^ feel free to tag me I’d love to see any artwork/writing. (But keep in mind the ship will not be canon for my ocs/aus. Unless it’s something we’ve decided to make canon between ocs/aus) 

(To add on to point 2) I’m also okay with people making their ocs/etc have a sibling/parental/etc dynamic with my ocs/etc. (Just as long as it’s nothing problematic)

(To add on to point 2) I’m okay with people simping/being unhinged about my (adult) characters. I will be unhinged with you. So feel free to send any rants and stuff about my characters/aus. (But please keep the rants somewhat sfw, as stated in point 1, minors follow my account.)

When interacting via asks please state which characters you're interacting with. And when it's an au version e.g I have two aus so far you can’t just say ‘for your au Nightmare’ as I will not know which Nightmare it’s for. So please state which lol. (If a specific version of the character isn't stated I will just guess)

(Adding onto point 2/4/5) I’m okay with people sending in asks where they use their ocs/aus/sona to interact with my ocs/aus/etc in a shipping context, may or may not do doodles in response depending on my mood.

I’m super okay with dumb asks! I’m also okay with people sending ideas/head canons/etc about my ocs/aus! I will try to include doodles and such if I have ideas on stuff to draw.

I also treat my sona more like an oc, so feel free to send my sona asks and such too. Even though I treat my sona as an oc, I DON’T want anyone shipping anyone with my sona, it will make me a little uncomfortable. UNLESS I have mentioned I don’t mind my sona being shipped with a certain character e.g. me self-shipping my sona with characters, I’d kindly ask people to refrain from shipping my sona with characters. 

Please do NOT use my characters/aus/etc for your own roleplays. It makes me feel uncomfortable to think that someone would be using my characters/designs. To add to this do NOT use my characters/aus for AI sites (e.g. character AI), same reason as the rp, and also AI bad.

[bajibitch]

Their fans are writing fanfic of them, and killing you off.

Rindou, Ken, Souya, Kazutora, Haruchiyo, and Shuji

⚅ Rindou ⚅

“All that hate and you still don't got me!”

Rindou understands that fans will fantasize and get carried away, but certain lines shouldn’t be crossed. Even though their stories are fake, you’re very much real. He calls them out if it ends up on his dash because reading the graphic ways they kill you pisses him off. He’s blocking anyone that left a note and sharing it on other platforms so his followers can attack them.

⚄ Ken ⚄

“I hate it.”

Ken doesn’t read it but found out about the fanfic at an interview. They read an unsettling excerpt from an angsty piece with a gore trigger warning and he was appalled. If they knew Kenni’s background maybe they’d understand why he lost his temper, but the fans were outraged when he decided to take a break from music. It got bad to the point where he didn’t get on social media unless he was promoting a project.

⚃ Souya ⚃

“If you replaced my partner with a random oc, I’d love it.”

Souya loves dark themes and doesn’t care what people write, but that’s him. Unless you tell him that you don’t mind their twisted stories, he’s gonna comment that you aren’t okay with it. It’s only bad when the fans fight against it and keep trying to justify writing you in those fucked up situations. He retaliates with his own stories of him killing them off to be closer to you. The stories are horrific and downright evil, they hate it. His more tame fans find it hilarious since he’s showing them how it feels.

⚂ Kazutora ⚂

“You guys need to look at this from my perspective.”

Kazutora isn’t good with his words when he sees the story. The only words that come to mind are: die, kill yourself, stupid bitch, and more vicious thoughts. He’s tried being nice and they kept arguing against him and using the same old argument. It looks like Tori’s spiraling with each comment and part of his fanbase joins in. Soon the fanfic writers are being attacked for even mentioning you.

⚁ Haruchiyo ⚁

“I wish I knew where you guys lived a few years ago.”

Haruchiyo doesn’t waste his time arguing. There’s no point. It’s the internet and people are heartless since they’re safe behind the screen. He wants to go back to the unhinged killer he use to be, but he knows he can’t protect you if he’s gone. Haru no longer does meet and greets, and he gets an attitude whenever someone asks about the situation that leads to his decision. The fans that aren’t part of the fanfic community pick on the ones who are, since he stopped sharing updates of his personal life.

⚀ Shuji ⚀

“They’d never do that.”

Shuji will comment on how you’d do the opposite of what they wrote. The public doesn’t know your name and the paparazzi hasn’t caught a photo that shows enough of your face, so he isn’t worried. They’re making up a new character to shit on. His only ick would be them taking your moments, like your anniversary trip to France, and recreating it with themselves.

[shostakobitchh]

finally admitted to myself that ok maybe i doooo ship snily 🙄 the thing is that i cannot find fics… i mean i *can* but there’s too many and i don’t know where to start……. so this is me asking for recommendations from the only jily shipper i know of (i’m not in the fandom a lot lol). i think it would be cool to read about them getting together as adults or something where snape is a little bi (turns out i also ship snape and sirius…. whatever ok!!!) but truly anything you have i’m accepting hehe i trust you! thank you bye!!! ps; i miss a&i aka the fic that i love so much and that i shamelessly recommend to literally everyone i know xxxxx

hi!

I'm gonna be real with you; there is very little Snily and even fewer stories I've found that do them both justice. I find that many make Lily a damsel in distress with like, her only driving motive to be a mother, and James is ALWAYS a POS. And Snape becomes an alpha male who is too controlling and it just skeeves me out. Lily loses all autonomy the second they do the deed and it's just not my thing. Even with the few Snape/OC fics I've read; if Snape is not like feral and nasty and with someone who can match that energy, I have no interest in it.

I have two major stories that come to mind with A+++ Snily. I have discovered recently that I am somewhat of a Snape Snob when it comes to fics where I only enjoy it if he is an unhinged, bitter little asshole who is a little nuts and Lily is like, the only one who can stomach him and keep him somewhat calm, but she can absolutely match his level of crazy if/when she needs to.

Come Once Again and Love Me - laventadorn

I read this nearly a decade ago and I haven't picked it up again because it just breaks my heart and puts it back together. It's a "Snape gets a do-over" but he does NOT want the do-over - he doesn't want anything to do with Lily at all at first - but the author does such a beautiful job of showing Snape as a bitter 30-something-year-old back as a teen just as his life took a dark turn. And Lily is AMAZING - her grief over losing her life old life (when she thinks of Harry it's gutting) but finding Snape again is just - UGH. She doesn't put up with his shit. She matches him and doesn't back down. She's awesome. A true queen.

A Dream Carved in Stone - diadelphous

I forgot about this one for a long time and recently reread it - I think I accidentally took inspiration from it with a certain potion LOL so I am giving full credit here - BUT - THIS is the best Snily I have ever read. It's during the first war where Lily and James never got together and Dumbledore approaches Lily and asks her to get Snape to confess he's a Death Eater. Their love story is - SO. FUCKING. GOOD.

They are both a little broken and a little crazy, but when people ask me how it would've gone down if Snape had known about Lily being pregnant, THIS story is how it would've gone down. When he's Soft with Lily it's so natural, it's so tender and raw and I die a little. Also, his reaction when Lily says she's pregnant is 10/10. It makes me laugh and cry every time.

I'm sorry I don't have more but I genuinely don't know of any others (at least that I like). I love this pairing so much LOL it makes me so sad there's nothing out there.

[zombiecicada]

The People Have Spoken.

But don’t worry, I can do a DTIYS for the next milestone, if I reach 100 followers!

But for now, here is the event:

Submit theories, head canons, or guesses you have about the characters or lore shown thus far about the Wolfbell AU.

Rules:

-You can submit as many as you want. There is no limit to how many entries you can submit, your only cap is your own imagination. You have my permission to explode my inbox. Is there a limit to the inbox? I would like to test this theory. Please specify if your submissions into my inbox are asks for the Kirby Oc Tourney or for the 50 Followers Event I am an easily confused creature. Alternatively, you can make an actual post with your submission, but be sure to tag me so I can see it and specify that it’s for the event in the post.

-They do not have to be about Wolfbell (the character) specifically! Feel free to take a stab at some of the other characters within the universe or simply the lore and story itself. As long as it’s relevant to the overall AU, it counts.

-These theories/head canons can be as simple or as complex as you want them to be. Fully and completely encourage walls of dialogue and text and in depth analysis. ‘Haha I think character likes *x* or *y*’ and that’s the theory is just as valid. Just know, I’m a sucker for a good long lore dump and it is my weakness.

-Submissions can be serious or silly, it’s both serious but I also want to hear your unhinged hot takes.

-Please keep it fairly SFW. That being said as the Wolfbell AU is more on the NSFW side covering darker themes, I will allow such, within reason. If you’re uncertain feel free to ask me.

-If you submit entries in my ask box you need to not be an anon because I can’t declare you the winner if I don’t know who you are.

-Feel free to include little doodles and illustrations for your submissions, however this is not required! You can also include your own ocs interacting with mine or interacting in some way to make it more fun.

-If two people submit the same exact ‘correct answer’, I will go with the one I feel best explained or conveyed the theory and or head canon. Again, I’m personally biased for blocks of text.

-While there are multiple ways to win, you cannot ‘win twice’, if you submit more than one ‘correct answer’ and make it to the top three you’ll still only win once and two other people will still be other winners. The ‘winning answer’ will simply be the one I liked most and any additional ‘correct answers’ will simply earn you bonus doodles. In the total there’s gonna be six winners, three ‘most correct answers’ and three ‘most incorrect answers’, along with several little bonus winners where I was amused and entertained.

-If you submit an answer and it’s spot on and you crack the lore, obviously for spoiler purposes the submission will be handled differently. But there will be bonus ducks.

What will happen:

Gonna let this contest go on for a week! By the end of the week, I will go through all of the submissions and I will slap them all on a ‘iceberg’, with the most unhinged and non canon answers in the void and the closest to canon answers on the surface!

The top three at the tip top of the iceberg and the bottom most three will get a prize! A full body coloured render of their Kirby oc (or if you don’t have a Kirby oc/don’t want it to be a Kirby oc we can discuss that but yeah, prizes!) if you ‘win more than once’ by submitting multiple ‘correct answers’ you’ll simply get funny little bonus sketches of your characters.

Any questions or concerns, please DM me here on tumblr or on my discord.

Event will end at midnight Pacific Time on Sunday June 23rd.

[marbarmars-arts]

So...I MAY have been collecting Fawfuls like pokemon cards <3

(and what the heck do I mean by that exactly??) WELL in a discord GC my friend Parmy suggested we’d imitate each other’s art styles as like a collab of sorts? Well...I kinda took that a step further heheh ^^

(And fun fact...this was supposed to be something I was gonna do for AU day of Fawful month too, but that idea got cut due to time)

So may I present...the different Fawfuls I drew!! For my friends/cool acquaintances!

So the one who led up to this in the first place, Fawful from @parmsnik AU!! He is dating/eventually marrying Naspi depending on where you’re at in the AU haha! Your way of drawing Fawful seems to change a little bit each time you draw him, so I tried to my best to guestimate a consistent looking Fawf! Very cute!

Up next is Fawful from @the-spacewaffle AU!! Yippee Ronnie’s AU! Thanks for being my friend for so long,,to talk about Fawful and all that stuff y’know? I’ll be cheering you on to complete the story qwq your Fawful is always so nice to my OCs when we crossover khskdjh also...pet the Reddo!

Eee yay now it’s @snuffydoo Fawful and his AU title I totally made up on the spot! I know you don’t really have a name for that kind of thing and it doesn’t have to be canon but I hope you think it’s cute anyways haha! I had a lot of fun drawing this one!! It’s so stylized! AND IT HAS DIMMY (I enjoy your Dimmy artstyle sm) but I don’t draw Spamton very often kjhskgh

Here’s @federthenotsogreat Fawful AU of sunshine goodness~! HE RETURNITH (and since I couldn’t think of another character to feature with your AU...not knowing if Cackletta is there or not jhgskg I gave him a cute little swirly sun!) I admire the fact his outfit is mostly YELLOW and also blue those are cool colors OH AND THAT LEG TOO, also super cool :)

The smol and cute @omgtheywereroomates Fawf! Your ask blog is so neat! I know I don’t ask too many questions there but I just,,,the cartoony fluffy hair?? Love that, and also thank you for your support and the super cool ship as well ^^ 

Heheee yeah hey it’s @cammiluna Fawful from Immortal Fool! Before you say anything YES I’m aware he’s got the new design since it’s near the end of the comic, you released the page that featured said new design while I was already working on this drawing xD So whoops! I just wanted to give appreciation to your comic series that you continued despite everything, and well...I know I haven’t shown much progress on it, I also want to make a comic series...so you’ve inspired me a lil :D

Deep down here there’s a little AU by @aliencatwafers which features Fawful in the sewers! With the little baby bros!! You’re a very insightful and inspiring writer with plenty of neat headcanons and ideas for the bean! Ik you mostly draw in pencil but I took the colors from your submissions to Fawful month this year and used em here! Hope it looks cool!

This little gremlin here with the two moms is Fawful from @bean-n-shroob ask blog! He looks very silly and unhinged (in a good way) and I hope he’s having a good time since after BIS! I love how round your designs are and Fawf is no exception :D

Last but not least is this VERY soft Fawful from @localdealmaker​ and their AU, whose title I made up too (again doesn’t need to be canon or anything if you don’t want it to be, I just wanted to give every drawing a cute name ^^) I think yours was the most complicated to draw for me but I love how he looks, so squish!! Kaboo is cute too!

WHEW THAT WAS A LOT OF TYPING KSJHKGH but yeah I hope you guys have enjoyed this...I might make another part someday full of more Fawful designs from friends but I AM A LITTLE BURNT OUT...doesn’t mean I didn’t have fun tho!

[willtheweaver]

Writerly questionnaire

Thanks for the tag @thatuselesshuman @the-golden-comet @the-letterbox-archives @theink-stainedfolk

How long have you had your writing Tumblr/ Writeblr? A fast and loose estimate is fine!

I’ve been on Tumblr for five years, although only two of those have been as an active part of Writeblr.

What led you to create it?

There really aren’t that many places where I can go off about my writing. Most of the people I know have moved all over the place.

What’s your favorite thing about the Writeblr community?

All the support from fellow writers. It’s validating to know that there are those out there who enjoy your work, and that you made the right decision in pursuing writing.

What’s one thing you’d like your mutuals to know about you?

I am always open to asks. Ask about my writing, world-building, OCs, advice, writing tips, I’m open. I do my best to answer, but some stuff I don’t want to spoil just yet.

Is there anything more you’d like to see on your dash?

Nothing I can think of.

WIP it good

Which Works-In-Progress (WIPs) are you noodling about lately?

Right now focused on A Feather in the Forest. Drafting is done, and now I’m doing editing and revising.

How long have you been working on them?

Eight months.

Do you remember what inspired them/ what got you started?

I had a vague idea in my head for a story. Just some thoughts that I thought could be made into something cohesive, and so I jumped in.

When someone’s asks the dreaded “What do you write about,” question, what do you say?

Whatever is in my head.

What do you want to say (if it’s different from what you say)?

I said what I said, and I stand by my words.

Let’s rotate Blorbos

Name any character you’ve created. Side characters, protagonists, antagonists, characters who’ve never been written, the first original abomination you’ve pulled out of your ass: whomever you like!

Are you sure about this? Very well then…here are some off the top of my head:

Fen, Playa, Opal, Sorrel, Caine, Leif, Ivy, Nettle, Rail, Quill, Volt, Halley, Hesper, Grey, Reed, Dirge, Zephyr, Cya, Gale, Morgan, Clio, Talvi, Marigold,Freya, Squall…(continues until the heat-death of the universe)

Who’s the most unhinged?

None so far, but there is more than enough time for screws to come loose…

Who comes the most naturally for you to write?

Whichever I’m in the mood to write.

Do you ever cringe at them?

On occasion.

How much control do you feel you have over your characters? AKA do they ever “write themselves” , refuse to cooperate, or do things you didn’t expect? To what degree? Are some less cooperative than others?

Do the gods hide because they are afraid that the mortals are tired of their little games and are plotting to destroy all deities? That’s how it feels sometimes.

Do you enjoy people asking about your characters? And do you have a preferred means of receiving said questions? For example, as Asks, as Replies, as Reblogs, as tags, as comments on AO3, etc.

I do. Always feels good to have someone to talk to about OCs. As I am active on Tumblr and not on AO3, any and all asks, replies, reblogs and tags are welcomed.

On Writeblr Engagement

What makes you want to follow another Writeblr account? Do you follow ‘em as you see ‘em, or take time to scoop out the blog to make sure it aligns with its contents? Do you follow based on WIPs, or vibes?

I check them out before I jump in. Call me weary, but I like to get a good feel for potential moots. If I feel like they are a good fit, I jump on in.

What makes you decide against following?

Unnecessary negativity, AI content, hate, bigotry, overly political content all turn me off.

Do you interact with non-mutuals often?

I do whenever I have free time. If anyone wants to ask about my WIPs, OCs, or tag me in tag games, I do my best to respond.

Do your mutuals’ characters occupy a space in your noodle?

Yes. A memorable character always sticks with you.

Do you interact with your mutuals often?

As often as I can.

Tagging @kaylinalexanderbooks @mk-writes-stuff @xenascribbles @words-after-midnight @nczaversnick

@bookish-karina @paeliae-occasionally @poethill @jay-avian @riveriafalll @lavender-gloom

@the-ellia-west @autism-purgatory @duckingwriting and open tag

[nerdieforpedro]

Weekend Update 05/12/2024

I’m back! Two weeks in a row!

Very good Nerdie. We appreciate this. We’ve been keeping tabs and you’ve been busy this week.

I did dabble in a few things this week.

A new discord server started by myself and my friend fhatbhabie for Latinx/Black/POC Pedro stans. It’s one of those things where I shouldn't have been as surprised by the overwhelming support for it as I was. It’s actually been pretty awesome and I’ve had very thoughtful DMs. The name of the server is Unhinged Clubhouse.

I wrote my first mostly smut fic in a while with Dave York. Trule wasn’t expecting him of all Pedro characters but, the smut fairy does what she wants, when she wants and I just gotta roll with it. It was another entry for Jett’s Flora & Fauna Challenge. 

Going through my inbox - mostly caught up but still a few outstanding replied to be made. Sorry about that.

Lastly, working on WIPs and deciding in addition to working more on Weddings 101 with Dieter, which other series I’ve been working on did I want to pop out there? Frankie and Ezra’s series are finished and I think I might wrap up the on Din series in the next part or two. The other Din series I have to workshop a bit. I have ideas of who I want to pop up next from Star Wars, I just need to work it in. 

Also Weddings Dieter: Sesame Street, Reading Rainbow and cheese? How do we feel about this? I also could use some help in deciding between the following for my next series: Marcus Pike vs. hot dogs + therapy, me finally writing nice things for Javi P, Dieter + brick house + you and a baby, and Pero Tovar + Dragon for revenge? 

Lastly, does anyone have some prompts for nipples? It sounds weird, but consider, this is me. Also with @mysterious-moonstruck-musings influence, I have a weird bullet point list and made a horrible drawing. I just need to write something so it will leave my mind. I hope. 

Side note: Nerdie now has reblogs queued up to July 21st. The queue shall know no rest! 😎

Nerdie, like are you sure there’s no recreational use of anything? Like really sure?

Nah, these ideas are all from a sober mind. And I shudder to think what I would be like if I did, so I don’t partake. Mainly because I’m a scaredy cat and also my alcohol tolerance is low. Plus I like mixed drinks. 🤭

Now it’s time for everyone’s favorite part:

Fic recommendations! I read a lot this week!

1. Worth A Thousand Words by @intoanotherworld23 (Joel Miller x f reader)

2. Chapter 1 - Howdy Neighbor! by @inept-the-magnificent (Frankie Morales x Plus sized OFC)

3. A Rugged Kindness by @pedropascalsx (Pero Tovar x F reader)

4. Just the Lilac by @djarinmuse (Dieter Bravo x F reader/OC)

5. Torment Part 2 - Terror by @djarinmuse (Din Djarin x Fem OFC)

6. Torment Part 3 - Horror by @djarinmuse (Din Djarin x Fem OFC)

7. Torment Part 4 - Wounded by @djarinmuse (Din Djarin x Fem OFC)

8. Torment Part 5 - Victims by @djarinmuse (Din Djarin x Fem OFC)

9. Torment Part 6 - Trauma by @djarinmuse (Din Djarin x Fem OFC)

10. Torment Part 7 - Healing by @djarinmuse (Din Djarin x Fem OFC)

11. Fall Into You by @megamindsecretlair (Kevin Atwater x black fem/plus size reader)

12. For lifetimes of missing each other - chapter 1: Meat Cute by @tinytinymenace (Demon Pero Tovar x OFC)

13. For lifetimes of missing each other - chapter 2: One Bed by @tinytinymenace (Demon Pero Tovar x OFC)

14. For lifetimes of missing each other - chapter 3: Happily Ever After by @tinytinymenace (Demon Pero Tovar x OFC)

15. So Much Goddamn Talkin’ by @stargirlfics (Joel Miller x Black fem reader)

16. To the Flame chapter fourteen by @pedroshotwifey (Dark Javier Peña x fem reader) DDDE

17. Scattered Promises chapter 1 by @soft-persephone (Din Djarin x AFAB OFC)

18. Waffles and Cigarettes by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin (Javier Peña x fem reader)

This week I hope to have a new series up, maybe chapter six of Weddings 101 and my entry for the Dieter Bravo Brainrot Serve club challenge (it’s slightly over the word count - I’m going to see if it will still make sense on another edit). I dunno if all of those will happen, but at least one of them should. 

Stay safe and hydrated everyone!

Love Nerdie! 🥰 💜💜💜

[stepswowdsen]

【KHR AU】 Nguyễn Selena 💜🌙🪷

Figured it's been a long time since I posted about my wife, Selena~

Nguyễn Selena is my KHR OC who is a Vietnamese non-binary assassin. Her Vietnamese name is Nguyễn Nguyệt Vân Liên.

Her name, Selena, means "moon" 🌙

Her Vietnamese name, Liên, means "lotus flower" in Sino Viet 🪷

In my KHR AU, she joins the Varia as one of their members and lives at their headquarters with the rest of the core Varia members. My wife has NB flag colours~ 💜🖤🤍💛

I mainly ship Selena with Xanxus.

In KHR, Xanxus is the leader of the Varia, an independent assassination squad under the Vongola mafia family. He was initially one of KHR's major antagonists.

You can read more under the cut!

Context

I added context for my mutuals who don’t know much about KHR, but would still like to tune into my KHR AUs and KHR OC stuff. Feel free to read only if you want!

Vongola Family = The KHR protagonist, Tsuna, is currently training to become the 10th generation boss of the Vongola family. Tsuna and co. are the Vongola family’s 10th generation guardians.

Varia = The Vongola family’s elite independent assassination squad. Their leader is Xanxus.

Source: (X)

Nguyễn Selena: Relationship Chart 💜

(Snippets from the KHR fan-wiki that I figured were relevant)

Source:

Sorry but I don't want to retype all this again so I'm just copy pasting from my Notion doc

Selena's info sheet and character relationship chart was inspired by FGO Materials' character profile formats where it lists a chara's general info, usage of pronouns, quotes, relationships with other charas, etc.

I still need to revamp the quotes with Selena's relationships with the other Varia members so I just posted Xanxus' part for now

I also included my rambles with friends!

Selena is the type who's calm and gentle but likes to keep to herself regarding matters that don't concern her. She's more aloof when she doesn't know the person well, but eventually opens up to the other Varia members.

I imagine Selena speaks in a really polite and formal way to Xanxus out of respect for him.

Xanxus and Hibari are my no. 1 fave KHR characters (tied) 🥰

Also used Glaze on my art as protections against A/I fart

Also I'm just thinking of the recent FGO: Summer 7 event with Douman growing cursed morning glories (vampiric shikigami), flowers that suck blood.

I NEED THIS FOR SELENA

DOUMAN BASED

Selena's man eating plants 🥰💞

Selena is very soft and gentle, but she can be a little unhinged, as a treat!

Selena is a gardener and florist (flower enjoyer and enthusiast)

[creative-time]

A proper fair well

Well… here we are, I’m actually leaving

I just want to be clear, I love dhmis. The original series, and the pilot, will always have a special place in my heart. I’m still a fan, just not so much of a fan that I would spend like 75% of my life dedicated to a tumblr blog about it anymore.

Maybe it’s just burnout, or the fact that I was so disappointed in the tv series that it finally broke me, or the fact that I started this blog when I was 14 at the beginning of 2016.

I started running this blog when I was 14, and I’m 21 now. For nearly 7 years now. We had some good laughs, I met some people that would change my life, for better or worse. And I could have never imagined that I would gather so many people together like this.

And I really hate to sound ungrateful, but, it still kinda makes me a little sad when people say I’m the dhmis news guy, because this blog was always supposed to be more than that. It was supposed to be ALL of the dhmis fandom. All the art, all the memes, all the conversations. This blog was about you guys! The people who made this fandom even possible! The people who built it from nothing, for everyone now to enjoy. I loved sharing news, but I loved sharing your, and my, creations even more…

I guess being considered the “dhmis news guy” just kinda made me think that I was easily replaceable in the fandom, like… if one day I stopped, someone else would just fill the hole that I was in super easily and no one would really notice I was gone.

I think a lot of people forget that… I’m a person… Creative-Time IS a person… I was a person this whole time… making sure this blog didn’t turn to dust and constantly being ridiculed, mocked, or straight up harassed and sent death threats to the point were I would sometimes cry myself to sleep. But I realized that all that just wasn’t worth the energy, this wasn’t worth the energy.

There’s probably so much more I could say here… I just wouldn’t know where to start. And maybe I’m saying all this super wrong and someone is gonna look through it with a fine-tooth comb and tell everyone that I hate them and tell everyone I’m a horrible person, which perhaps I deserve.

I would like to thank all the people that have actually tried to get to know me, I’m sure you know who you are. You all made running this blog a little bit more happier for me, and I hope you all are happy too, even if we never cross paths again.

I think the only thing that could ever get me back into the fandom and this blog is if there is more dhmis that is actually good, or the pilot get released in HD in some shape or form. Other than that, I think I’m done here…

I won’t be deleting this blog, but I would request no new followers or dms unless it’s the pilot in full hd.

If anyone really wants to ask any follow up questions, please send them to the ask box on my main @cosmicxd but I would like to remind you all, I’m an adult, my friends and mutuals are adults, so if your under the age of 18 I would suggest not following my main because me and my friends are… UNHINGED and we have a whopping ZERO filters. I really don’t want to block any of you but if I know you are a minor and you follow my main anyway, I will not hesitate to block you, so just don’t. thanks I’m advance.

Now, a few things that I should wrap up in a bow.

Here’s what might be the final piece of artwork I do for TeVi and Purple Girl, I will try to make a series to put them in in the future but I want to work on another original series right now so it might not be for a while. So there are not really consider dhmis ocs anymore I guess. Just puppet ocs now

Also, a final update for Mini Mean Steve: Finally found some model magic and Mod Podge glad to say he is finally complete! He will be my most treasured possessions

Thank you for reading all the way through this, and for one final thing

Here a sketch of me kissing icehell Tony and Paige. (Because if im going out, I’m going out with a hell-freezing, earth-shattering BANG!!!)

Thank you all once again, and I’ll see you on the flip side!

-Creative Time

[firephoenix2020]

HUMANS I GIVE U MY GENSHIN AU INCORRECT QUOTES~

Ships: Zhongli x Nightmare, Terry x Venti, Xiao x Aether, Devil x Ash

[ocs: Nightmare, & Terry are twins, & Ash & Devil are their parents]

Zhongli & Nightmare are Xiao's adoptive parents.

Ages: G!Aether min 500, A!Xiao 2000, Arc!Venti 2500, D!Zhongli 6000, D!Nightmare: 7000, D!Terry: 7000, D!Ash 8000, D!Devil 8000

[D! = Dragon, A! = Adeptus, Arc! Archon, G! God from another realm]

TW: Swearing, mentions of Drugs, mentions of smoking, mentions of weapons, mentions of being stabbed, Ships you might not like, Weird/toxic family relations [Nightmare & Terry], mentions of Funerals, mentions of death, I think that's all-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aether: You know what I’ve realized? Xiao: Some thoughts are better left unsaid? Aether: Nice try, anyways-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil : *talking about Terry’s funeral* You do know we’re burying a great person today! Zhongli [& Nightmare], shocked: Did someone else die?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: Can you cut me some slack, Aether? I’m sort of in love. Aether: I’m sorry, but that’s really not my problem. Xiao: I’m in love with you. Aether: *blushes* Oh. That brings me in the loop a little.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: Pfft, you should meet Venti, they're such a tsundere. Aether: They… they just stabbed you. Terry: So cute.

Nightmare, in the background: wtf bro-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: How many children do you have? Nightmare: Biologically, legally, or emotionally? Because there is a difference.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: Something tells me Devil 's going to be a bit more unhinged today… Devil, holding a lit match and a bag of cheetos: Leave me be, Ash isn't home to stop me, I'm going feral.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: Why are you late? Nightmare: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness. Zhongli: Overslept? Nightmare: Overslept.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: Where are my fucking keys? Terry: Venti, Razor is around, can you say it a little nicer? Venti: May I ascertain the whereabouts of my FUCKING KEYS?!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PAST! [about 1000 years before the timeline we are at in the rest of the quotes, basically when Zhongli was trying to get Nightmare to marry him]

Terry, about Nightmare and Zhongli: My god, would you two just get a room already? Nightmare: Excuse me, Terry? Terry: You both just keep agreeing about horrifying things and relishing everybody else's misery. So seriously, when's the wedding? Zhongli : … Venti: I ship it! Xiao, who hasn't mentally prepared for both his Parental figures to actually be married: CAN YOU NOT?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare: You disgust me. Terry: *eating a kitkat sideways* I realize this and don’t care.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[siblings lol-, oh btw Nightmare is based of me, Terry is based of my younger brother, Ash is based off my mom, & Devil is based off my dad]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil : I'm so tired of this life. I want to be a roomba. I want knives taped to me. And I want to be set loose.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aether: *eating a cinnamon roll* Xiao: Cannibalism. Aether: *confused chewing noises*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash, carrying a box: What would you say if- if I, hypothetically, came home with 7 kittens one day? Devil : … Devil : What’s in the box? Ash: What woul- Devil : Ash, what’s in the box? Ash: I think you know.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: If God’s ever been mad at anything I’ve ever said, he hasn’t done shit about it. Zhongli: So he either doesn’t care or he’s a coward.

[boy you are a god- still added this tho bc it was fucking hilarious]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil: I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers. Ash: Devil, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[About when Zhongli was 100, Nightmare was 1100, & Ash was 2100]

Nightmare: I don’t remember that. Ash: Do you remember that night last week when you slept in a revolving door? Nightmare: …No. Ash: Okay, do you remember when you were chased by those wild dogs for two miles? Nightmare: Not especially, no. Ash: It was in between those two things.

Worried Baby Zhongli noises: ???

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aether: Okay! Let’s play Kiss Marry Kill! Aether: First who would you kill? *Ash points at Venti* *Zhongli points at Venti* *Devil points at Venti* Venti: *shrugs* I would kill me too.

Terry: ?????

Nightmare, laughing her ass off: HOLY ARCHONS-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash: Are you laughing at that video of Nightmare and Aether fighting? Venti: No. Venti: I'm laughing at the comments.

[Nightmare whooped Aethers ass btw, ain't no way he was gonna beat a psychotic 7000+ dragon lol-]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Having a argument*

Venti : Go fuck yourself. Terry: Come over here and fuck me yourself you coward!

Nightmare: if you're gonna do that you both better go back to your house, there is no way I'm letting u two fuck each other in my kitchen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[None of them canonly smoke in my au btw]

Nightmare, rubbing their temples: I am not proud of what I am about to say, but someone get me a cigarette. Ash: But Nightmare, we don't smoke. Nightmare: Cut the crap, Ash. I'm not an idiot. I know that one in five people smoke. Nightmare: *points at Zhongli* One!* points at Xiao* Two! *points at Devil* Three! *points at Venti* Four! *points at Ash* Five! Nightmare: Now, I am going to close my eyes, and when I open them, there better be a cigarette between these two fingers! Zhongli: *puts a cigarette in Nightmare's hand* Nightmare: Thank you Love. …Light? The Squad: *all simultaneously pull out lighters*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aether: If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're impressed. Xiao: But you do know better.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: Aether, why are you crying? Aether: This book is so sad!! Xiao, picking it up: But this is my diary-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: Good news! I didn’t screw up! Terry: … Venti: I screwed up less badly than usual! Terry: … Venti: Screwed up with less immediate consequences than usual.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash: :) Nightmare: >:( Ash: Turn that frown upside down! Nightmare: ):< Ash: Not sure what I was expecting…

[this is way too accurate to me and my mom irl lol-]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash : Wanna get out of here and grab a bite to eat. Venti: I don’t usually eat with losers. Ash : Neither do I but I asked you, didn’t I?

[My mom hates Venti, But my Brother loves him lol-]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli : This can’t get any worse. Can it? Nightmare: Sure it can- just give me a minute.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: The real treasure was the memories we made along the way. Terry: I almost died. Zhongli: That… was my favorite memory.

Nightmare, laughing her ass off: Agreed-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: Heyyy Venti, how’s your… drink?? Venti: What do you mean drink? It’s coffee. Terry: You sure?? *Looks to coffee maker* Venti: *Looks to coffee maker* *Cement sitting beside the coffee maker* Venti:…I’m on my third fucking drink right now, I should be dead. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare, looking at their watch: It has been 2 hours and sixteen minutes since I’ve been insulted. Nightmare: It’s been about 5 seconds since I’ve been assaulted, but let’s not talk about that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: Shut up, you’re messing with my train of thought! Nightmare: I thought you didn’t have a brain and now you say you have thoughts?

[Me & My brother irl:]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: *slowly pushes a cannon into a 17th century bank* Okay everyone, be cool. This is a robbery.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: Why don't we just call it, "M.C. Donald's?" Xiao: Because it just sounds like a stupid rapper's name. Aether: It'd just be like- "Eyo, it's ya boy, M.C. Donald!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: Look at the buns on that guy! Nightmare: *lying on the floor, covered in hamburger buns* Fuck you. Terry: This is the comedy police! The joke's too funny! Venti: I'm not going back to jail!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

Nightmare: *was the one who bought him it* ^^

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Terry is laying on the floor with their eyes closed* Nightmare: Hey, are they sleeping or dead? Zhongli: Hopefully dead, I hated them. Nightmare: Yeah, me too. Terry , sitting up: First of all, fuck you guys.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: You call yourself my soulmate, but where were you when my meme only had four likes? Terry : Making four accounts. Venti, tearing up: Really…?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: You wanna fight?! You got one! Venti : Okay! *raises fists* *Terry runs in, scoops Venti up in their arms, and runs away carrying them* Zhongli: Zhongli: What?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: Due to personal reasons, I will be fucking sinking to the bottom of the ocean in a large metal box. Terry: Did Aether say 'I love you' and you said 'Thanks'? Xiao: THE REASONS ARE PERSONAL–

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*The gang when they drop food on the floor* Ash: Aw man. *Throws it away* Terry: Five second rule! Devil : Foolish germs, thinking they can stop me!? Eats it off the floor Nightmare: *Sobs on the floor*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash: Hey, Joe said he's coming over this afternoon. Terry: Cool. Ash: Do you know who Joe is? Terry: JOE MAMA! Nightmare, not even looking up from their phone: Damn, that backfired.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil: Can I have some water? Terry: *starts chugging their water bottle* Terry: *chokes from drinking too fast* Terry: *spills water all over themself* Terry, coughing: I don't have any water.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti : As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much they’re loved. Nightmare has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for them. Zhongli: By forcing them to have fun at a party that they don’t want to be at? Terry: I knew you’d understand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: What's gone wrong, Aether? Aether: Hey! That’s one hell of a thing to say to a person. Just because I’m calling doesn’t mean there’s a crisis. Zhongli: That’s technically true, I suppose. Why are you calling? Aether: Well… There’s a crisis.

[lol Father-In-Law & Son-In-Law having a normal conversation]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil : Hey Zhongli, Nightmare just broke my seashell lamp. Zhongli: Neat. I’m gonna die alone. Devil : Okay, you win.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: Hey, do you know the password to Nightmare’s computer? Zhongli: Fuck you, Terry. Terry: Hey!! Zhongli: No, you misunderstood, the password is "fuckyouTerry". Terry: Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.

[Not her password btw lol-]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aether: A SPIDEEER!!!!!! Venti: KILL IT! SMASH IT! Terry : BURN IT! Nightmare: STAB IT! WITH A KNIFE! GET ME THE SHOTGUN! Ash: Awww, it’s so cute! Look at it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Drunk! Aether: Babe, you're so funny! Nightmare: We have 1492 days until your tragic premature death. You will break my trust three times before that happens, but I forgive you. Drunk! Aether: Awwww, that's sweet of you!

Nightmare: Aether where is your Boyfriend even?

Drunk! Aether: idk-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare: Alright, listen up you little shits. Nightmare: Not you Aether. You’re an angel and we’re thrilled you’re here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: Don’t be sad! Nightmare: Why not? Zhongli: Zhongli: I don’t have a good answer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: Play to your strengths. Terry: I haven’t got any!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: So what are your political beliefs? Venti, awkwardly trying to impress them: Well, I think Pikachu would be a lot more powerful if he had a gun.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil : I feel like the world would be better if I'd never been born. Ash: Aw… that's not true. Ash: It'd be exactly the same. Ash: You're not important.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: If I see a bug, I simply leave the room elegantly and require someone else do something about it. Xiao: If no one fulfills my wish, I simply never go back in there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: I know where you live. Devil : Where? Xiao: In a house.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: Dearly Beloved, we are here today to remember Nightmare, taken from us in the prime of life; when they were crushed by a runaway semi, driven by the Incredible Hulk. Nightmare: Aww, you knew my favorite cause of death.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The gang responding to being stabbed by a sword Devil : Rude. Aether: That's fair. Zhongli: Not again. Nightmare: Are you gonna want this back or can I keep it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*At a dinner party, the guests converse while the host is away* Xiao: So how do you know the host? Venti: They were a former vegan, and they bought milk. Terry: That BITCH! Aether: I pulled them over for money laundering. Devil : I'm chaperoning their dinner party. Zhongli: They stole a baconator! Terry: That BITCH! Xiao: I tanked the store they were managing and they convinced me to quit from one of the only jobs I've ever had. Now I'm living off of unemployment checks and fear!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: So what’s for dinner? Terry: I can’t tell you, it’s a soup-prise! Venti: … Venti: Is it soup? Terry: I soup-pose it could be! winks Venti: Please, enough with the soup puns! Terry: Wow, you’re soup-per mean. Venti: STOP! *one hour later* Venti: It’s fucking tacos?!?!?!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli, about a fight between Nightmare and Terry: It scares me how many knives were involved. Venti: There… weren’t any knives involved though? Zhongli: That’s what scares me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*The squad is asked what they would do with 5 children with only 3 chairs.* Zhongli: Get two more chairs! Devil: They can get their own chairs. Terry: Make them fight for it. Nightmare: You only need one chair to beat them all with. Xiao : I would never be near children. Venti: Kill two.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil: Hey. Ash : Hey? Devil: I can't sleep. :/ Ash : I can. Goodnight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: Do you know the ABCs of first aid? Nightmare: A. Bone. Coming out of the skin is very bad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: I love hearing Nightmare shouting at someone else. It makes such a nice change.

[She only yells at you when you do something stupid Zhongli-]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Devil: What is this!? Aether : That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away, my friend. Devil: Ow! Make it stop! Aether : Surrender to your kindness, Devil. It’s nice to be nice. Devil: Your guilt is strong, my friend. But it is no match for the power of my selfishness!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: I started school with straight A’s. Now I’m not even straight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti, who was dared to flirt with Nightmare: Is this mistletoe? Nightmare: Uh, no, no, that is basil. Venti: Too bad cause if it was mistletoe I was gonna kiss you. Nightmare: Yeah, no, it’s still basil.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Venti & Terry, in a room with Nightmare, Ash, and Zhongli*

Venti: It’s. . . calm in here. . .?

Nightmare: . . .

Ash: . . .

Zhongli: . . .

Terry: It scares me…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: Would you slap Terry- Nightmare: Yes. Venti: I didn't even finish! Nightmare: Sorry, continue. Venti: Would you slap Terry for 10 dollars? Nightmare: I would do it for free. Terry: Rude…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash: You're violent. Aether: Yeah but I'm also short and that's adorable.

Xiao: Can comfirm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here. Aether: Hey. Venti: Hi. Ash: Hello. Devil : Hey! Nightmare: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only! Zhongli: They were out of Doritos, 爱. [爱 means Love]

Nightmare: At Least Terry isn't here. . .

[He actually wasn't there lol-]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti : They made Terry cry! Nightmare: Terry always cries! Terry: That's not true! *cries*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash: Tired of just deserving better. Gonna start taking it by force.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: Dude, I will never forgive Craigslist for banning me after I wrote a post seeking a sworn nemesis. Whoever reported that is obviously my nemesis but I was so pissed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Venti: My friends say I'm the most charismatic out of the group. Devil : Well, you always have a smile on your face. Venti: Thank you. Devil : Devil : What drugs do you take?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake. Venti: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear. Zhongli: … Zhongli: You mean ring bearER, right? Venti: … Zhongli: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to MY & NIGHTMARE's wedding.Whispering: I just got her to agree to marry me too-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*after discussing a plan* Nightmare: Does anyone have any questions? Xiao: Is this legal? Nightmare: Does anyone have any relevant questions?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightmare: What do you want for breakfast? Venti: I WISH TO DEVOUR THE UNBORN. Terry: Terry: They want eggs.

Nightmare: why are u two even at my house again?

Terry: We were hungry and in the area-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Xiao: Relationships should be 50/50. Aether cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter looking pretty.

[Xiao can't cook in my au, tho he and Aether do still live with Nightmare & Zhongli-]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ash: Venti, you look deep in thought. What’s wrong? Venti: Did you know you can look at any object and know what it’s like to lick it? Even if you’ve never touched it before? Ash: I’m never asking you anything ever again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zhongli: Blue M&Ms are the best. Terry: WHAT IS THIS SLANDER? Zhongli: What about it? They are. Terry: I WILL NOT ALLOW SUCH LIES ON MY MINECRAFT SERVER! Terry: THE RED ONES ARE THE BEST! Zhongli: YEAH? WELL YOUR MOM'S A HOE! Venti: They're all chocolate inside, the colors don't mean anything. Devil: I like the yellow ones. Also why'd you call my wife a Hoe? Zhongli and Terry: SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terry: Thank you for not saying "I told you so." Xiao: When you’re as right as I am, you don’t have to say it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

that's all for today, I think I went a little overboard so sorry about that! Hope you enjoyed it tho!