#i want better for our cinema

[meherya]

There's something to be said about the uptick of punjabi cinema focusing on punjab of the 1900s rather than modern day... a lot of it has to do with invoking nostalgia within the community but also its kind of hard to ignore the romanticization of society back then especially when it comes to the status of women and the role they played way back when

[mariocki]

Lo voglio morto (I Want Him Dead, 1968)

"If the Confederates and the Yankees sign a truce, the two of us are ruined!"

"And so?"

"So, they have to keep killing each other until we've sold everything. Everything, right down to the last cartridge!"

[theinfinitedivides]

so. guess what they did again

someone tell white people stop reviewing Bollywood by mediocre Western standards i'm f*cking crying rn

[luveline]

I was just rereading your marauders sex shop blurb. I love how the boys have just adopted reader into their group, and how open they are with their affection for her. You do such a wonderful job of writing intimacy that rides the line between platonic and romantic. And I love the readers inter monologue of wondering if that intimacy means something more romantic like she wishes. It’s wonderful! I was also wondering if there’s a blurb on how the boys met reader for the first time?

thank you so much, that’s so nice of you <3 there wasn’t one but I hope this is okay!! —Remus, Sirius and James move into their new flat. You’re helpful. fem, 1k

The stairwell is filled with the sounds of kissing. Remus frowns, heart beating quickly, arms aching under the weight of yet another box. He gets to the top of the stairs and peeks around the box’s sides. 

Sitting on the step of their new doorway is James. And, sitting on top of James, stroking his cheek, is Sirius. His hair is falling all over the place and they’re kissing so much Remus assumes they’ll have bruised noses. They often turn their kisses into a fight, like one of them can win, though it never really ends that way. He wants to laugh as Sirius pushes James down for more kissing, and he sort of wants to watch regardless because they’re both good kissers and he��d quite like to be included, but mostly he needs the heavy box put away. 

“Someone please help me,” Remus says. 

James breaks away. Sirius squeezes his face and begins to kiss his neck. 

“Baby,” James says as he pushes him away, which is funny, unlike him and unlike Sirius to be called it, but also not actually unlike either of them when Remus really thinks about it. 

Sirius gives a last peck and pulls away. When he gets up to look at Remus properly he’s flushed all over from the activity, his neck and face turning red in splotches. 

Sirius and James have spent a lot of time spoiling Remus into love. He would’ve ended up there regardless, but he’s used to being the centre of attention. It was nice to see them kissing, and he wishes he didn’t interrupt quickly, but neither party seems to begrudge him. Sirius stands up and James is a second behind him, taking the heavy box from Remus’ arms before it can topple to the floor. 

“We��re on break,” James says with a grin. “Especially you.” 

“We have to take the van back tonight, in case you forgot. There’s still half our stuff in there.” 

“If we have to pay their fine, it’s fine,” James says, shifting the box against his chest. “I’d much rather pay the extra day than have us all hurt ourselves. How will we ever test the big bed if poor Remus can’t move?” 

“Poor Remus,” Sirius says, taking Remus’ hand to play with his fingers. 

This is pretty much everything Remus has ever wanted. To get to keep his two best friends forever, to be in love, to live together in a new city with good food and better cinemas. And here, nobody knows them. Nobody to judge them or give them strange looks. They can just be together like they’ve always wanted to be. 

Remus leans down to put his face against Sirius’ chest, their hands still held, Sirius’ free arm wrapping around him loosely. 

“Tired?” Sirius asks. 

James reluctantly leaves for the kitchen to put down their heavy box. 

“No. We really need to empty the van.”

“We will.” Sirius drops his nose against Remus’ hair. “Cliche if I kiss you?” 

“I like cliches.” 

Sirius puts his lips to Remus temple. Barely a kiss, no movement nor sound, but Remus knows it counts. It’s about intention. 

“Would you like a rough one?” Sirius asks quietly. 

“Maybe later.” 

“Please, let me give you one,” he says. 

“And have you press me into the floor? I don’t think so.” 

Sirius tips Remus’ head up and presses a kiss to Remus’ Cupid’s bow in an act of lifting his face, and then presses an equally gentle kiss to his lips. All this kissing… 

“I’m so happy we’ve moved,” Remus admits. 

Sirius squeezes his fingers, pulling away to meet charmed eyes. “All we need to do is find James a new team, and it’s perfect. Everything, finally.” 

“Hello?” someone calls. 

Sirius and Remus keep their hands held and shuffle across the hall to look down at the square. The flat building is strange, big and with an interior that’s an exterior, and you stand on the grass with a smile. 

“Hi!” you say, hands on your hips. You’re dressed for the strange weather, jeans and a t-shirt and a zip-up hoodie, entirely non-assuming. “Are you guys moving in?” 

“We are!” Remus says back. “You live here?” 

“My friend, I came to make sure her cat was okay, she’s gone to Ibiza. Do you need help?” 

“Oh, no, we couldn’t ask you to!” Remus says. 

“Sure you can!” 

You smile, and Remus thinks you look really lovely when you smile, it changes everything about your face. He feels guilty for the thought quickly, but it’s not as though being in a relationship means he can’t tell when girls are pretty. 

“Are you busy?” Sirius asks. 

You grin and make for the metal stairs up to the flat. 

Remus peeks at him in surprise, then suspicion, but Sirius only smiles at him. “We’re making friends already,” Sirius says, giving him a nudge. “That’s what we wanted.” 

James returns, having taken off his hoodie, a brown t-shirt loose on his frame. His own, then, because he insists on stealing from everybody’s wardrobes and stretching out their clothes. 

“Why are you guys shouting?” 

“Nice girl’s gonna come help us move.” 

James raises his eyebrows. 

‘Nice girl’ makes her way up the stairs. You’re still grinning when you get to the top, unperturbed by the appearance of another boy. “Hi,” you say, holding out your hand for an introduction. “I’m Y/N.” 

It’s the start of a long road. Remus shakes your hand and gets the sort of butterflies he’s terrified of now, though eventually Sirius and James will admit to the exact same thing, and no one will know what to do about it.

[itgetzweird08]

“You’re nervous..”

You said so matter of factly, your head resting on Bakugou’s chest. He grunted, opening one eye to look down at your face. “I can tell,” you continued “Because you didn’t clean your room before we laid down… and you didn’t do your reps. You only miss those when you’re sick or when you’re so nervous you can’t focus. And I know you aren’t sick so…” he scoffed, closing his eye again. “You should be a goddamn detective if this hero shit don’t work out.” You chuckled, but his joke didn’t distract you. “Talk to me Kats…you’re nervous about tomorrow, aren’t you?”

He stayed silent, and for a moment you thought prying was a bad idea. You had only been dating for four months, since Christmas, and you didn’t want to over step any still fresh boundaries. But Katsuki sighed, shrugging softly. He figured, if there was anyone he could be real with, it was you. Plus, he was trying to learn to communicate a little better anyways.

“Yeah. ���M nervous. Not cuz I don’t think we’ll win, but because of…you.”

You sat up, looking at him confused. “Because of me?” He huffed, sitting up and facing you. “Yeah- I know we’ll kick ass. We got the top heroes, Mr. Aizawa, and both of our classes. Even though they ain’t as strong as me, everyone can put up a fucking fight. But..I’m worried something’s going to happen to you. What if they put you on the front lines, or the villains manage to get free and end up hurting you? Taking you? What then? What if…I can’t protect you?”

You frowned hearing his worries, and at some point during the confession, took his hand. But your frown slowly turned into a soft smile, and you ran your thumb across his knuckles in an attempt too soothe him. “Kats… do you remember what you said when you confessed to me?”

He snorted, “Of course I fucking remember. I said ‘go out with me you damn nerd, it’s getting cold out here.’” You shook your head, nudging him with your shoulder. “Before that, dummy. You said-“ He cut you off “ I said ‘I’ve fucking liked you since the fitness test. I thought you were beautiful, capable, smart, and stronger than the rest of the extras in this goddamn school and if there’s anyone who can give me a run for my money to be the top hero, it’s you. And I think it’s still true’” He quoted himself, and you kissed his cheek, taking his face into your hands. “Exactly— you know I’m capable of protecting myself and putting up a fight. Trust me, I’m concerned as hell for you too, but I need you to focus on the mission and not me. I’ll be okay. We’re both gonna kick some villain ass and I promise once it’s all over I’ll be right back here laying next to you and watching that cheesy fucking all might movie you love so much.”

He growled, grabbing a pillow from behind him and gently whacking you with it. “It ain’t fucking cheesy! It’s classic fucking cinema”

You grabbed your own pillow and hit him back, giggling all the while. “Mmhm! Of course it is.”

“I’m serious Y/N!”

It was moments like this that kept Bakugo brave as the battle began. And it was moments like this that you both thought about as he took his dying breaths. He was so worried about protecting you, but you couldn’t protect him.

Pity.

——— —-

I have no remorse :) Anyways im starting to do requests! So if you have an idea for me, go ahead and put it in my asks <3

[harrysgal]

I DIG YOUR CINEMA (1)

harry styles x yn aspiring filmmaker — social media AU

I posted this yesterday but I wanted to change a few things so I deleted it and now I’m posting it again lol it’s long but I still hope people like it!

About the smau: yn starts posting videos on youtube and is trying to build a career as a filmmaker. Things are going pretty well for her and she starts getting more attention when she creates content about shows she goes to. She’s also a fan of Harry’s music and some of his fans start getting suspicious when his team starts interacting with her.

Disclaimer: The story it’s set in 2021 and it will follow their relationship through the LOT leg in the US. Since this is nothing but fiction, I will be following some of the real timeline but also adding my own stuff. On top of that, I won’t be basing myself on Harry’s actual posts.

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I DIG YOUR CINEMA (PART 1) — MEET YN

liked by bestfriend, yourbrother, and 60 others 

yourinstagram here’s to a new year and new beginnings :)

view all 6 comments

bestfriend love youuuu  bestfriend im so happy to have you back!! 

↳ yourinstagram pls don’t let me choose a bf ever again ↳ bestfriend don’t worry. single squad for life ↳ bestfriend or until one of us gets married lol  ↳ yourinstagram 😂 love you!!

Jan 5, 2021 • 

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liked by bestfriend, yourbrother, and 75 others 

yourinstagram can you believe just three months ago this gal was heartbroken, unemployed, and out of dreams? guess the world reallyyyyy spins around, huh 😜

view all 8 comments

bestfriend yes it doesss  bestfriend now the universe is giving back what she deservessssss yourbrother i think i liked you better when you had no social life

↳ yourinstagram 😂 omg fuck off ↳ yourbrother if this is the language you use around my children i’m never letting you babysit again ↳ yourinstagram 😔 stop that’s not funny

Feb 10, 2021 •

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liked by sisterinlaw, bestfriend, and 60 others 

yourinstagram got myself a camera and a dream (plus an empty bank account)

view all 7 comments 

yourmom Are you OK? Do you need money? x

↳ yourinstagram im okay mom :) love you ↳ yourbrother my bank account is empty too

bestfriend can’t wait to be your +1 at the academy awards 

Feb 26, 2021 •

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liked by yourbrother, bestfriend, and 85 others 

yourinstagram step aside pls your girl just posted her first video on youtube and is now one step closer from becoming a filmmaker ✌����

view all 13 comments 

bestfriend THAT’S MY BESTIE sisterinlaw Loved it!! 💋 yourmom I miss you. Give me a call x yourmom Also you should post pictures of your face x

↳ yourinstagram 😂💗

childhoodfriend Nice to see you still love telling stories, haha great video!

↳ yourinstagram oh my gosh it’s been a while! 🥺 thank youuu let’s catch up soon  

Mar 19, 2021 •

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liked by yourbrother, bestfriend, and 167 others 

yourinstagram life lately

view all 23 comments 

user1 just watched your video on youtube about growing up and i’m in tears! you’re soooo talented

↳ yourinstagram omg that’s so sweet thank you so much :’) 

yourbrother why bothering buying a camera if you’re going to steal mine

↳ yourinstagram i didn’t steal it  ↳ yourbrother but you also didn’t give it back yet did you? 

user2 Loving your content!!

April 10, 2021 •

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liked by bestfriend, anotherfriend, and 319 others 

yourinstagram hellooooo i just posted another video :D even tho she’s not physically in it, i must admit our 20+ years together completely inspired this one. thank you for being there for me. i’m very lucky to call you my best friend and i love you 💗 hope you enjoy it!

view all 25 comments 

bestfriend i cant rn i’ll be back when i stop crying user1 amazing!!! another great video! loved everything about it, left me thinking and wondering about lots of things. i’m blown away by how talented you are.

↳ yourinstagram you’re so sweet 🥺 thank you, it means more than you can imagine!

yourmom Lovely girls 🥰 user3 This was my favorite so far!

April 21, 2021 •

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liked by bestfriend, sisterinlaw and 512 others 

yourinstagram got my first paycheck and went out shopping 

(ps: remember when my ex freaked out bc he didn’t want me to buy harrys album? lol here’s to you pal) (fine line you’ll be next i promise!)

view all 57 comments 

bestfriend harry styles album listening party tonight

↳ yourinstagram as if we don’t already listen to it everyday lol 

user1 you’re so real for this lol user1 also wtf? why didn’t he want you to buy the album? 

↳ yourinstagram bc he was jealous and insecure  ↳ bestfriend jealous that you’d bump into harry someday, mention you bought his album and he’d fall in love with you  ↳ yourinstagram lol talk about delusional  ↳ bestfriend he just knew your potential ↳ user1 😂😂😂

yourbrother so YOU are the reason why my daughter is suddenly obsessed? user5 Omg didn’t know you’re also a harry fan! What’s your favorite song?

↳ yourinstagram sign of the times always and forever

May 6, 2021 •

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liked by bestfriend, yourmom and 750 others 

yourinstagram just me and my little camera conquering the world ❤️ lol no but srsly, i know it’s only been a month since i posted my first video on youtube but so far ive had suchhhh a great time working hard to make my dreams come true :’) i sometimes fear my content isn’t much or isn’t professional enough, so the feedback i’ve been getting truly warms my heart and puts a smile on my face! thank you. thank you. thank you.

view all 86 comments 

bestfriend ❤️❤️❤️ yourbrother why are you still living in 2020? 

↳ yourinstagram why are you so annoying?

yourmom We’re very proud sweetheart x

↳ yourinstagram wouldn’t have done anything without your support! love you ❤️

user1 your content is AMAZING! the way you bring little stories to each video has me obsessed 

↳ yourinstagram i love telling stories so much!! im happy you enjoy them! 

user3 Honestly you’re one of the most creative people I’ve come across lately. The way you approach each topic with so much honesty and tell real life stories while not really including people in your shots is incredible!

↳ yourinstagram omg thank you so so much! this means the world me! 

May 6, 2021 •

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liked by bestfriend, sisterinlaw and 910 others 

yourinstagram hiii i just posted a new video on youtube and im really nervous about it lol this is really different from the others + a little longer, but also the most special so far. it includes a very memorable moment we lived as a family just a couple weeks ago so i trulyyyy hope you enjoy it! lmk your thoughts plssss

view all 103 comments 

user1 i just sent this video to everyone i know. i feel like i say this every time but this one is my favorite yet!! you’re so talented i want to live inside your brain

↳ yourinstagram hahahha you’re the best thank you sooooo much for your constant support!

bestfriend ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THIS WAS MY FAVORITE ONE SO FAR  bestfriend pls take me to a concert and make a short film of me dancing to my favorite songs too 😭 i beg you!!!!

↳ yourinstagram let’s do it! ed sheeran? beyonce? harry styles? ↳ bestfriend YES ↳ yourinstagram yes it’s not an answer lol you were supposed to pick one 

user8 👏👏👏 you’ve outdone yourself with this one!  user4 You’re so real about this one! My mom LOVES Shania Twain too and the day she saw her live for the first time was exactly like this! She just turned into a fangirl all over again haha 

May 27, 2021 •

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user2 Hey there. I’m so happy youtube just recommended this to me. I’m in love with your content! So creative and touching. I’m definitely going back to binge all your other videos now. I was just wondering, though, is this your real family? I’m only asking because from the way you tell the story it feels so much like watching a movie that it made me wonder if they were actors following a script 😅 hope you don’t take it the wrong way. Have a good one!

↳ youryoutube hiii thank you so much for watching and for being so respectful and polite about your comment! 😊 this is my own family, yes! i actually wasn’t planning on filming this, but my brother and i took my mom to see shania twain (who’s like, her favorite artist of all times!) and i woke up inspired to make a little video about it. i’m really glad you enjoyed it, and i’m actually really flattered by your question, because this was the first time i didn’t script a video at all and was really afraid in the end it wouldn’t come up the way i wanted to. so thank you!!  ↳ user2 Oh, wow! Thanks so much for taking the time to answer me. That’s really interesting to know. Loved how you managed to capture the emotions without actually exposing anyone. I also enjoyed how this isn’t just a “vlog”, if that makes sense. It truly feels like an actual story with beginning, middle and end (I mean, there’s even some drama in it!). So cheers to you! Can’t wait to see what else you’ll come up with in the future.  ↳ youryoutube THANK YOU! oh my goodness that’s exactly what i’m always going for :’) thank you, thank you!! 

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liked by bestfriend, yourbrother and 3,614 others 

yourinstagram hello????? i just woke up to the news that the one and only queen and goddess shania twain watched my video????? and shared it?????? what the hell it’s happening????? 

view all 245 comments 

yourbrother thought you were going to expose mom losing it on our gc haha bestfriend I’M COMING OVER WE’RE FUCKING CELEBRATING user1 😍😍😍 yesssss love to see you getting bigger and bigger!! user18 omg that video was so cute!! also love your aesthetic user14 your mom’s excitement was the sweetest it left me in tears  harryfan say 🙋‍♀️ if you’re here because gemma shared her video

↳ harryfan2 🙋‍♀️ ↳ harryfan3 🙋‍♀️

Jun 1, 2021 •

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liked by bestfriend, anotherfriend and 5,875 others 

yourinstagram good morning?? is life even real?? 

last week was sooo insane omg im still over the moon and also so happy reading everyone’s reaction to my mom’s dream coming true 🥺 everyone’s just so sweet and kind! thank you!! i wish i could spend the entire day around just chatting and celebrating, but today is a big and busy day for me so wish me luck im really gonna need it 

view all 541 comments 

bestfriend remember there was a time when i used to be the first and only to like your posts? :’) user1 good luck!! user4 Can’t wait for your next video! user9 I THINK I JUST HEARD YOUR INTERVIEW ON THE RADIO??

↳ user10 Yesss. I was driving to work and I heard that too haha ↳ user3 omg what did she talk about? ↳ user9 ＠user3 they were basically asking about the video/her mom. she explained that it was a really spontaneous thing and that she wasn’t planning on doing more of those but after seeing everyone’s reaction she’s changing her mind. oh, she also mentioned she never expected shania to see her video and that she still doesn’t know how it got to her in the first place!

Jun 8, 2021 •

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liked by anotherfriend, cuteguy and 6,513 others 

yourinstagram quick life update: got a part-time job. moved to a new apartment. completed my harry styles album collection. went on a date with a cute guy. posted another video. 

so far no complaints. 300/10.

view all 617 comments 

bestfriend can’t believe ‘went out for dinner with my best friend’ didn’t make the cut 

↳ yourinstagram sorry that’s bts content

user5 Your last video was amazing!! So were the last two before that!! Totally feel like you found yourself in the music field 

↳ user1 omg i totally agree! i can totally see this becoming a series or something like this ↳ yourinstagram ohhhh i love the idea!! :) 

harryfan any chance this cute guy was harry styles himself?

↳ yourinstagram 😂😂😂 minus 100% chances 

user3 Is this part time job film related maybe?

↳ yourinstagram i wish :( needed a normal part time job to pay for my dream job actually lol

harryfan2 omg which one of his albums did you get?

↳ user5 she already has self titled so she must’ve gotten fine line now

June 25, 2021 •

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liked by bestfriend, cuteguy and 8,315 others 

yourinstagram sorry i havent been here the past few days but i was busy playing hide and seek with my niblings (i just found out there’s a word for niece + nephew btw. how cool is that?!!)

view all 732 comments 

harryfan girl tell me why i came here to watch one video and never left? :’) 

↳ user1 lol same!! she’s great isn’t she?

yourbrother i hope you know you’ll be the one buying your goddaughter a ticket for that harry styles boy

↳ harryfan2 “that harry styles boy” lol excuse me sir? ↳ yourinstagram you’re about to get soooooo dragged and all im gonna do is sit here and watch lol ↳ sisterinlaw I’m sitting here, too!!

user4 your posts always brighten up my day 😍

July 3, 2021 •

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liked by cuteguy, yourmom and 11,798 others 

yourinstagram i can’t believe there are so many people watching me post stuff like this lol i don’t really know how to behave and i get easily embarrassed so if you don’t mind i’ll just pretend we are no more than 5 friends just hanging out okay? thanks!!

btw wanted to share that we took my niece to see ariana grande so…… guess what??? new video will be up tomorrow :D this one is once again a little bit different from the others idk im always trying new things so let’s see if it works!! 

view all 931 comments 

cuteguy 😍 bestfriend when is it going to be my turn? :(( user3 omg can’t wait!!! will we finally get to meet your niece??

↳ yourinstagram nooo:( i don’t feel comfortable sharing them on the internet. that’s also why you’ll see this video is kinda from a parents perspective? idk how to explain with words you gotta watch it to see it haha ↳ user2 we love a respectful and mindful woman 💪

harryfan can’t wait for the day you see harry omg i just know that will be the best video ever

↳ harryfan3 right like so many fandoms have been getting these incredible videos i’m so jealous

July 12, 2021 •

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liked by yourinstagram, bestfriend, sisterinlaw and 4,339,032 others

harrystyles LOVE ON TOUR will be going out across the USA this September and I could not be more excited for these shows. I love you all so much. I’m very excited, and I can’t wait to see you. H

view all 100,888 comments 

bestfriend ＠yourinstagram 🤭 harryfan ＠yourinstagram THIS IS IT DO YOUR THING PLS I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT user2 OMG ARE WE FINALLY GETTING A SHORT MOVIE??? SAY YES PLS OMG ＠yourinstagram user7 i feel like if yn doesn’t take ＠bestfriend to at least one show there will be blood 😂

↳ bestfriend ＠yourinstagram see? everyone knows it should happen ↳ yourinstagram ＠bestfriend STOP WE’RE SO FUCKING DOING THIS ↳ harryfan AIDHASASJDBAJHAJH I’M SO EXCITD

July 14, 2021 •

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liked by cuteguy, anotherfriend and 14,513 others 

yourinstagram had a reallyyyyy huge meeting today and i was losing my shit so this really cute guy took me out for a coffee :D 

(new video’s up!!! hope you enjoy it!)

view all 1,007 comments 

user4 are you guys sharing a piece of cake? stop that’s so sweet :(  user8 omg she has a bf?? but what about harry?? lol

↳ harryfan7 THAT’S WHAT I SAID!! she was supposed to go to his show so he could see her in the crowd and fall in love 😩 ↳ harryfan12 lol please harry doesn’t even know who she is. also maybe don’t be disrespectful to the guy she’s actually dating? ↳ user8 ＠harryfan12 it was just a choke chill out lol

user1 can’t wait for the new video!!! (also… important meeting??? 👀)

July 29, 2021 •

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liked by bestfriend, mollyjane_x, cuteguy and 17,283 others 

yourinstagram i dont think you guys will ever understand how much you watching and spreading the word about my videos has changed my life. it hasnt been even even six months since i started posting on youtube and yet it feels like i’ve lived four years so far. thank you soooo much for deciding to join this ride with me!

also, so much is happening rn that i feel like i need to sort some things out and reorganize myself. so there’ll be a new video up tonight, and then i’ll be taking a short break before releasing any new content. it won’t be long, just a couple of weeks that will mostly be used to feed my creativity once again lol (and also to plan and script some exciting new projects!!) 

i hope you stay around and wait for me. i’ll see you back really soon 💗

view all 1,345 comments 

sisterinlaw 💗 user1 take all the time we need we’ll be here waiting for you!! <3 user3 you deserve all this sooo much!! harryfan7 i see you molly 👀

↳ harryfan11 no bc how are you even a harry fan and don’t absolutely freak out when harry’s creative director likes your post?? ↳ harryfan8 also his manager following her??? i mean what are the chances of being just a coincidence? 

bestfriend i love youuu and i’m so freaking proud of you 💗 user4 I’ll miss your content because it always puts a smile on my face, but I totally understand and can’t wait to see what’s next!

Aug 13, 2021 •

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liked by cuteguy, mollyjane_x, gemmastyles and 19,107 others 

yourinstagram so……. i kinda quit my part time job to start this other full time job? which is now finally related to something i truly love?? 😅 oh god!! i dont even know what to say. all i know is that im about to start the craziest adventure of my life and even tho im about to board the plane i still cant believe it is ACTUALLY happening. again, thank you so much for spreading the word about my videos and for being so kind about them. thank you for deciding i was worth your time every week. im only here right now bc you gave me the chance in the first place so thank you thank you thank you! 

i’ll share more details as soon as i can (and when i’m sure i wont jinx it lol) but for now, THANK YOU!

view all 1,501 comments 

cuteguy have fun, call me when you land 😘 harryfan you’re going to the LOT and nobody can convince me otherwise!!

↳ user4 why wouldn’t she just say it, tho? ↳ harryfan idk she normally never shares she’s going to a show anyway she just posts the video later 🤷 

harryfan8 the fact that molly and jeff followed her and now molly likes all of her posts can’t be random. also she quitting her job and traveling the same day so many from harry’s crew are traveling? 

↳ harryfan2 AND GEMMA LIKING THIS POST? WHY IS PEOPLE SILENT ABOUT THIS?????

harryfan7 gemma liked this post but she doesn’t even follow her??? bestfriend i miss you already can’t wait to visit you!! user1 im so excited whatever it is you deserve it so much!!!!

Aug 25, 2021 •

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PART 2: LAS VEGAS

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I’m not hopeful people will read and enjoy this, but if you happen to do so pls let me know? :( thanks!!

[orfisheus]

The Problem With the Eddsworld Fandom's Depictions of Red Leader/Future Tord, A Disabled Perspective

Disability is a contentious concept for most of society, with most either treating us with disgust, confusion, refusing to treat us as human, or to see our struggles as what they are. Ableism affects all people in many different ways, but as someone who focuses a lot of my energy in fandom spaces, the pervasiveness of ableism with how media and their fans interpet and react to disabled characters is a very personal situation for me. While many may argue that an ignorance to these topics in fiction has little bearing on real life, the prevalance of these tropes have echoed and led to feelings of othering for many disabled people, and oftentimes support the same notions that lead to the day-to-day ableism in our own personal lives.

In recent years, I have experienced this most often with the prevalance of negative disability tropes perpetrated by fanfiction surrounding the character of Tord, also known under the alias of Red Leader in some fanworks. It is a problem not just common in the Eddsworld fandom. A more recent, and much larger fandom in Mouthwashing also shares a common trend of repeated ableism in fan depictions and interpretarions of disabled characters. Most fan creators are unaware of these tropes and the harm that they cause, but as a disabled person, I am unable to ignore it.

For context on myself, you can call me Fish. Get it? Or"fish"eus? I like to think I'm funny. I am a mentally ill, disabled, and neurodivergent creative who has niche interests in representation in media and the intersection of intersectionality and fandom spaces. I experience chronic pain due to a multitude of conditions, all of which are invisible disabilities. I am NOT an amputee or have a facial difference, like the character I am analyzing. I can only speak based on my own research in my attempts to portray him positively, but I want to mainly focus on the ableist tropes I see and the real life effects they have. That is something I CAN focus on, because I've been dealing with it for years from conditions that came onset later in my life. I will be speaking from that perspective, but will be doing my best to try to educate on what I do know from my research to help authors, artists, and creatives create a better portrayal of him in fanworks.

The most common tropes I see with him are what I will call "The Disabled Villain", "The Innacurate Disability", and "The Ignored Disability". There are a few tropes in each, but for ease of organization (and the sake of your (and my) time), I will be talking about them together in these sections. There are also overlaps in many, but I will define the main issues with them.

The Disabled Villain

James Bond, Wonder Woman, The Witches. You name it. You have most likely seen this trope at work in cinema. A malicious evil-doer is revealed to have a "horrid" face symbolic of the true evil within their soul, while the beautiful, able-bodied hero is meant to stop them. It's a trope as old as time, one that goes back to even Plato. Tropes are tropes, people subvert them, so a few cases down the line may be excusable. But that has not been the case For many years, the most prevalent form of representation for disabled people was in these villains. Imagine if the only representation you had for yourself was narratives surrounding how the way you look or what your disability is and have it only be equated to evil people. It leads to a villainization of disabled people. People react to facial differences with disgust, because they are "shown" that it is "evil", or "ugly", or equal to being a horrible person. As stated by The Nora Project, "According to the book Disabilities: Insights from Across Fields and Around the World, disabled students are two to three times more likely to be bullied in comparison to their nondisabled classmates. The disabled villain trope contributes to this phenomenon in overt and subtle ways. For example, the trope implicitly encourages fear of disability and difference, while validating, and even elevating, those who fight against the evil, Disabled Villain. Bullying based on fear and disdain is almost a natural consequence of the trope when viewed in this light". Another big issue is that disabled characters have not been given space to exist outside of villainy. There are not many complex narratives surrounding them. This leads to our disabilities being downplayed, us being dehumanised, and we are seen more like props in real life, or simply tools to achieve a message in a narrative.

Tord's disability is never explicitly shown in the show. It is something more prevalent in Fanon, specifically in fanworks that focus on the "Future" era of the show's timeline, where the narrative and outside discussions on the show implies a high tech society, potentially dystopian, potentially a consequence of his actions. These ideas have taken a life of their own in the fandom, with many creators fully expressing these ideas. The problem arises when Red Leader falls in line with this trope. In many works, he is the sole disabled character, a figure of pure evil, or given little nuance in the narrative. Artists illustrate his scars as bright red, crimson, or, in TBATF, green. For some reason. In this way, they attempt to highlight the villainy by equating him with common symbols of evil: facial differences and disabilities. Unfortunately, these are not just symbols. These are conditions and scars that real people have, which the fandom tends to ignore in favor of dramatization.

This was a trope I most commonly saw explored in fanfiction when I first joined in 2016/17. The show, unfortunately, subtly and accidentally perpetrated it by having the only character visibly and irreparably "damaged" by the giant robot fight be Tord, despite the fact that Tom, who had a whole missile directed at him and got buried under a house, was fine with at most a leg injury and a cut on his arm. Luckily, we have grown past the need for ableist tropes, and the faults of the show can be left in the past!

... Not.

Disability tropes have simply evolved in how the fandom treats Tord. Even if it is now done with more consciousness and sympathy towards his character, ignorance still prevails. Let's talk about common pitfalls people fall into when writing him.

The Inaccurate Disability

In fanon perception, Red Leader is an amputee with a high tech prosthesis and a facial difference resulting from burn scars. Like many disabled characters, he suffers from a collective fandom lack of research. But never fret! That is what I have subjected myself to for the past four years, so your friendly neighborhood disabled Fish can tell you how to right your fandom wrongs! Just kidding! Take this as a pointer, and do your own research.

As is common with fictional prosthetics, his arm prosthetic is treated as a perfect fix for his amputation. It acts just like, if not better than an actual arm. The issue with this is that is isn't realistic. Yes, I know, I'm criticising Eddsworld fanfiction for not being realistic. STAY WITH ME HERE. Once again, if it was one instance, or a few, that explored prosthetics being incredibly functional in science-fiction, then it could be a cool concept. But when every sci-fi work has it, then that is no longer a concept. That is a misconception. And I have interacted with people who believed that prosthetics were 100% functional! The thing is, like all disability aids, it does not suddenly make us able-bodied. For example, I have ear defenders that I wear when I experience pain within my ears. But that does not mean my hearing will now become normal, and I will no longer experience pain from the sound I'm hearing. What WILL happen is that I will straight up not hear you. Like, literally. Can you repeat that? I had my ear defenders on. Oh, you're saying that my ear defenders aren't prosthetics and are not a fair comparison? Well, that's fair, but take this as an illustration of a disability aid and how they differ from able-bodied experiences. Also, many prosthetic users do many things without their prostheses, and some even prefer NOT to wear them. Blogs that explicitly cover disabled representation, such as @/cripplecharacters, have posts that cover WHY many amputees are not fans of this trope. The problem comes with that it erases disability, and yet also treats us like we are given a space at the table of representation. It's just another way that authors avoid actually doing research.

Other things that people tend to ignore are how burn scars, or any scars, would not only appear on a character, but also affect them. I have seen, aside from skin tones that looked like they were picked out of a crayon box instead of what would appear on a person, teeth exposed, wounds that look as if they are fresh from the explosion YEARS after they occurred, and what I like to call "paper shredder" scars. Because instead of them looking like burn or shrapnel scars, it appears as if his skin was put through a shredder. Once again, another consequence of the show's at most-30 second scene with questionable decisions that made massive ripples in the fandom. With the injuries Tord received, it is most likely that he would have two kinds of injuries: a burn on 18% of his body (minimum, based on rule of 9s), and/or shrapnel scars from debris. While shrapnel scars would manifest as darker scars, the burn scar would likely be a hypertrophic scar, as "70% of patients develop hypertrophic scars following burns" (Finnerty et. al). The scars, when healed, are warm toned on the boundaries of their areas and cool in between. When on a pale skintone, they are not too dissimilar, and would therefore not have such a drastic color difference as seen on skin. They would also not go down to the bone or skin, as that would be a completely different kind of injury, and are also commonly done to make him look "scarier", which then aids the Disabled Villain trope. It also treats these scars and injuries more like a work of fiction, rather than something that many real people have experienced, adding to continuous misinterpretations of real life disabilities and facial differences.

For writers wanting to include consequences of burns, what would be more likely to be affected are his hearing, vision, and nerves on the right side of his face, as burn scars can go as deep as nerve endings. Also, burn scars, especially third degree burns, require treatments, such as burn-specific skincare. Scars, especially burn scars, can affect you and become disabling. For artists, the main thing I don't see artists do is draw him with damaged hair follicles. Burn scars damage the scalp and eyebrows, preventing hair growth. I am sorry, but he would not still have fluffy, luscious hair. Do not kill me. He just wouldn't. And if you are saying that he had it in the show, I can't hear you because my ear defenders are on, but I hope you heard me, as we've gone over that the show is inaccurate and we should do our own research.

Even well intentioned authors and artists ignore many aspects of the disabilities he would likely have!

Which brings us to the last trope...

The Ignored Disability

Many well meaning people intend to give him nuance by trying to avoid the Disabled Villain trope. Accidentally, however, they end up completely ignoring his disabilities instead.

Just like the high-tech prosthetic, the real disabling aspects of having a disability are at best rarely mentioned. I have seen, in some fanworks, that he goes straight from amputation to having a prosthetic. And that is where his disability ends. Because the prosthetic ends up being a fix-all situation. Authors refuse, or forget, to include aspects of amputation, such as the healing process, stump or phantom pain. Artists will cover up his scars with a helmet or a mask, another trope that undermines his disabilities and attempts to brush it under the rug. I understand that there is a discomfort for able-bodied authors in thoroughly exploring how a character feels about their disability. That is something I think we should. Avoid. If you're not familiar with the experience of being that minority, you do not need to add commentary on it. And if you do, and it just falls into more negative tropes, I will send a salmon cannon at you (/j). However, I do not agree with brushing every disabling aspect of his life under the rug.

People can assume it's not a problem, like it isn't something blatantly apparent. But, if you assume that disability and being disabled is not a "big thing", you end up where your medication is denied because your insurance refuses to see your common procedure as not a necessary medical intervention because you're "too young". And that is not fiction. That is what inspired me to write this essay, because the day that I got that news was the same day I sat down and told myself that I needed to share my perspective on the perception of disabled characters by honing in on one of my favorite characters and how the fandom treated him.

Disabled characters deserve to be included in media, disability and all, with care given to how their life would operate as a result and what they would experience with their specific disability. That's why many people recommend sensitivity readers who can give proper insight upon that disability and can advise people to properly portray it.

But if you cannot afford or access that resource, what can you do?

Fish's Non-Cohesive List of Ways I Tried to Write Tord as a Non-Amputee Without a Facial Difference

Do research!! The more you are to try to understand what you are writing about, the less you are to misinterpret or misrepresent it.

Look into resources that focus on portraying disabled characters, especially with those you wish to write about. Read blogs, research tropes that are common in disabled characters, and hell, read medical journals. They can provide great insight (<< nerd who likes reading medical journals)

Include more disabled characters. Make the other boys be disabled! Want to be canon compliant? Create OCs who have disabilities! I have a bunch! It's 2024! Be cringe and be free! The character's disability would go against the traditional narrative form of "usefulness"? I'm an animator who can't wear headphones and a theatre performer who can't physically handle the volume of a band. And yet, we find ways to persist, to exist. We will always find our way to live in the way we want to, in whatever way we can.

Look into disability activism. Learn the difference between the Medical Model and Social Model of disability. Know what an invisible disability is. Listen to us when we say that we don't want to be treated as special or an inspiration for simply living (inspiration porn). The more you are aware of what we struggle in real life, the more aware you will be to not repeat those mistakes in your fiction.

Write what you can. Highlight little talked about aspects of having a burn scar or being an amputee, such as the recovery, or treatment for the chronic pain, or how different he would be in battle due to decreased depth perception. As a disabled author, I have personally touched on the experience of gaining a disability later in life, and how he copes with it. Now, not all of y'all can do that. But that is a personal experience I do have, and it is something I have highlighted in my own work. So, while I couldn't tell you the ins and outs of having a burn scar or a prosthetic arm, I could describe the shock and frustration that comes with suddenly experiencing difficulties, or even being unable to do what you had done before.

I ask that, if you are willing to do better, or to start on the right foot, you take what I have written, reflect on it, and treat disabled characters, and in turn, disabled people, better from here on out.

Fiction is not reality, but the way we deal with it is reflective of who we are and what we believe. The boundary for our own personal being does not suddenly stop within fiction. When we interact and interpret it and create for it, it is integral that we remain conscious that bigotry runs rampant, albeit often as an unseen force, within fandom spaces, and do our best to counteract that.

I have doubts that the new eddisode will treat this topic with the same respect. I hope you can all go forward with what you have read in this WAY LONGER than I expected essay, and do what those grown British men cannot. Even if they erase it, retconn it, or do not treat it with respect, let's all go forward and do better!

As for always, you can discuss more in the tags or my inbox!

I hope you have a wonderful life,

Fish

[rinhaler]

OMG HI I LOCW UR WORKS U ARE SO TALENTED THAT MEGUMI KNW WITH THE GUN?? JAW DROPPED SCREAMING DLENCHING THE TOES WANT TO LICK THE SCREEN

anyways i love you and everything you write <3 was thinking about ex babysitter jujutsu kaisen guy.. envisioning geto or sukuna or gojo (???) idk but they like used to make fun of u and be a little angel for the parents n stuff but seeing them again but ur all grown up and a little spicy reunion !! n they’re like 5-7 yrs older so yum

got so so so carried away as usual but this was so fun to write.. i made it satoru and suguru bc i thought it would be fun :3

warnings: 18+ MDNI, slight dubcon, fem!reader, age gap (reader 20s + them 30s), childhood crush to lovers?, alcohol consumption, love bites, tit sucking, praise, slight cucking?, double penetration (one hole), spanking, hair pulling, squirting, slight pussy eating, creampies, snowballing, pet names (sweetheart, baby).

words: 2.3k

It’s been months since you got to see a movie in the theatre. You don’t even remember the last time, or what you saw. But you’ve been counting down the days until you and your best friend finally had a day off work that lined up with each other. Why you’ve been craving seeing a movie, you’ll never know. But what you’ve been most excited for is the food.

Nothing has caught your eye, but your friend points out a cheesy sounding horror movie that you’re happy to see.

“Satoru? Is that you?” you ask, a familiar head of white hair catching your eye as you and your friend walk closer to him, seeing him leave the cinema screen you’re about to walk into. “Oh my God, I haven’t seen you since I was…”

“Wow,” he chuckles. “Look at you, all grown up. Yeah, it’s been a long time.” he continues. Your eyes meet the stare of the woman on his arm.

She smiles, but you see it’s disingenuous. Her body language is clingy and affectionate, desperately holding onto Satoru’s arm as she urges him to leave with her. You aren’t surprised that she’s trying to lead him away, but you are taken aback that someone has managed to tie the Satoru Gojo down. He was always popular with girls back when he used to babysit you, but he was never one for commitment or staying faithful.

“You two make a cute couple.” you smile at them both, trying to put the girl at ease. It doesn’t work, however. Instead, it seems to make her more nervous.

“It’s our first date.” Satoru informs you. He sighs a little as she pulls at his t-shirt, and it’s less than discreet. “We’re going to dinner later, so we better get going. It was nice seeing you though.” he smiles.

“Wait,” you stop him. “Um, are you still in touch with Suguru?” you wonder.

He smirks at that. He always teased you about having a crush on his best friend after the first time he brought him over for babysitting duty. They didn’t come as a pair every time after that, but it was more often than not. He made your heart race and you lost all ability to form a coherent sentence. You knew he’d never be interested in you; he was older and cooler than you’d ever hope to be.

“Of course. You know what? Here, give me your phone.” he tells you. The girl’s eyes fill with water, a look of defeat in a battle you weren’t even participating in overwhelms her. He quickly types his number into your phone and texts himself so that you can exchange contact information. “We can arrange a little reunion, yeah? See you around.” he winks before leading his date away.

A whole fortnight has passed before any plans come to fruition. That cinema trip is a distant memory that has been replaced with flirty texts in the group chat Satoru decided to make with you and Suguru.

It’s like being a teenager again.

Satoru’s teasing is ceaseless. Everything is so casual and generic in the group chat save for the occasional comment about your crush on Suguru back in the day. But it’s worse in the private messages. Now that you’re older and wiser he sees no point in holding back. He’s so flirtatious and grotesque and vulgar all at once.

Your conversations with Suguru, however, are a lot more reserved. Your fingers tremble whenever he texts. And the conversation is a lot sparser in comparison to how you talk with Satoru.

He’s sweet and kind, but you wonder if he’s just tolerating you for Satoru’s sake.

Satoru: are u cooking for us?

You: we’re getting takeout 🙄

You smirk at your phone as you continue to read the bombardment of heartbroken messages from Satoru, disappointment from the lack of a home-made meal. You can’t even tell if he’s being serious or kidding. You laugh, nonetheless. Though you’re easily startled when hear your doorbell ring.

As you open the door, you have to will yourself from allowing your jaw to drop. Pocketing your phone as you look up at Suguru. That handsome youthful face ageing into a more mature and chiselled one. It makes your heart skip a beat, but you try to downplay it.

“H-Hey!” you smile. “Nice to see you, it’s been forever.”

“It has, hasn’t it?” he smiles too, walking into your home when you move aside. He follows you to the kitchen, watching your every move as you pour two glasses of wine for yourselves. “I’m glad you got in touch.”

You continue to converse as you lead him to the front room and sit side by side on the couch. Neither of you seem to notice how time flies as you chat and reminisce about the days he used to come over to keep Gojo company while he babysat you.

As if you weren’t old enough to stay home without a sitter. That hardly helped your ability to seem cool for your age. And Satoru didn’t fail to tease you about that either.

“I always thought your little crush on me was sweet.” he laughs. “But I was too old for you, then.”

“I know.” you nod, taking a sip of the red liquid sloshing around your glass. “Do you remember that time Satoru invited two girls over?” you ask, face filling with heat as you recall the embarrassing incident.

“Oh,” he chuckles lightly, like a memory has been unlocked in the back of his head. “You locked yourself in your room and wouldn’t come out all night. Even after we sent them home.”

“I was jealous!” you try to defend yourself. “I was such a lame little pre-teen and then these gorgeous girls with perfect skin and perfect hair came over and you guys were hooking up and I was just… heartbroken!” you clutch your hand to your chest dramatically and begin to laugh as you try and make light of the memory.

He breathes, a soft smile prominent of his face as he thinks about it some more. The girls in question were the pretty, popular, cheerleader types. Everything you wanted to be, everything you wanted Suguru to see you as. And yet, you weren’t even close to achieving that reality. And still, he told them to go. Satoru felt bad for upsetting you, too. So they didn’t hesitate to tell them they had to leave.

“I remember sitting with Satoru outside of your bedroom door the whole time. You didn’t even use the bathroom.”

“Oh my God,” you laugh. “I ran to the bathroom after you left. And then I cried to my mom all night about how devastated I was.”

He thinks to himself, putting down his glass of wine on the coffee table before he looks at you. Your body freezes, worried you’ve offended him or creeped him out. A slew of words run rampant in your mind as you try and formulate an apology.

You’re taken aback, however, when he cups your face and slowly tilts his head before kissing you. It’s everything your teenage self had ever dreamed of. You want to drop your own glass to the floor and cup his face in turn as it deepens. But he pulls away, leaving you breathless and longing.

“We’re not kids anymore.” he whispers.

You put down your glass beside his, before lunging in for another kiss. He lets you push him back against the couch, stripping yourself of your sweater so you’re down to just your bra. He smooths his hands over your hips, watching you eagerly as he awaits your next move.

“We’ll have to be quick.” you tell him. “Satoru will be here soon.”

You bend down to make out with him again, keening as he expertly unhooks your bra. His lips latch around your nipple before you’ve even realise he’s tossed your bra halfway across the room. Your hips roll against his clothed bulge, still in a state belief that this is even happening.

“I always wanted you to be my first.” you confess, and he halts his actions momentarily. “But I’m glad… I can fuck you properly instead.”

He allows you to help him out of his own shirt, neither of you capable of keeping your hands off each other for more than a second. Even less than that for your lips. Each sentence is hushed and hurried as you try and navigate this new and exciting development in what was meant to be a casual, friendly, reunion.

“So you’ve got experience now, huh?” he asks, kissing your neck greedily as he thinks about how much you’ve grown in the last decade. “You know how to fuck like a good girl?”

You nod, dumbly, kissing his neck in turn before traversing down his sculpted body. You both freeze, however, when the doorbell rings again. Your eyes widen in horror as you realise all of your clothes are scattered across the front room. There’s no way you can get dressed quick enough. Maybe it would be better to pretend you aren’t home. That you ran out because you forgot something at the store.

“It’s open.” Suguru yells, your heart pounding even faster than it had previously.

Satoru swaggers in as you sheepishly look in his direction with your arms across your chest, doing all you can to preserve your modesty.

“Wow.” he sneers, a teasing lilt in his tone as he looks at you both. Sweaty and dazed, though one of you seems to look less embarrassed than the other. “I knew this would happen.”

“It’s not what it looks—”

“Your tits are in his face and I can see a bruise forming on your neck, sweetheart.” he interjects, getting closer to you both. “I’m not judgin’. Why would I?” he smiles.

You can’t help but feel like you’ve been set up.

“Oh fuck,” you moan, “It’s too much Satoru. I can’t. I can’t. Y-You’ll have to wait your turn!” you protest as he prods at your already occupied cunt. But despite your whining he continues to push himself inside of you, determined to stretch you to your very limit. He shudders at the sight of your pussy swallowing his tip and doing all it can to spit it back out.

He’s been watching on the sidelines, patiently, as Suguru fucks you in the comfort of your own bed. Palming himself as he gets off to the image of his best friend’s cock drilling into your perfect little cunt. He thought he could be patient, but he was sorely mistaken. He’s seen with his own two eyes how well you can ride cock, but he wants to see how well you can handle getting railed.

He pushes you down towards Suguru has his palm splays across your back. You’re soon comforted by the feeling of his lips on yours, though you break away to moan as Satoru inches in further and further. His cock flush against his best friends without a single care, revelling in the sounds of your ragged breath and desperate whimpers.

“I can’t wait, baby. You’re swallowin’ this cock so good. Just take it, yeah?” he tells you, slapping your ass as he starts fucking you slowly.

“You look so pretty full of cock, sweetheart. Does it feel good?” Suguru asks as he plants his feet down onto the mattress and starts to fuck you in tandem.

You nod as a response, yelping as you feel Satoru’s fingers interlace with your hair and yank you up towards him. Your sweat coated back pressed flush against his chest. His free hand holds your hips while he uses your hair to his leverage as his pace becomes brutal. Your pussy oozes and gushes as they each poke and prod and fondle you through their eager assault.

Suguru’s hands wander to pinch and slap your tits, his lip bitten raw as he gets off to the sight of your flesh jiggling and bouncing in all of the right ways.

You squeak, unable to utter a single word or even so much as moan as you begin to squirt from the pleasure. The feeling is enough to have Suguru tumbling over the edge right after you while Satoru wraps his arm around you to play with your clit.

“Again.” he orders, pulling you away from Suguru so that he can kneel in front of your twitching pussy.

The pleasure builds again. Harder, slower, but finally you snap. Your cunt gushes divinely and Suguru savours every last drop. Satoru finishes deep as his balls tighten and he moans pathetically in your ear. But he doesn’t give you or himself a second to relax as he hooks his arms under the bends of your knees, spreading you open wide so that your combined coupling drips out of your hole.

Suguru buries his face in your cunt, slurping up the mess created by the three of you. He sticks his tongue out to show you the lewd combination of your fluids, before looking at Satoru with lust filled eyes. Satoru leans in to kiss him, accepting the tangy tasting mixture into his own mouth before looking down at you.

“Your cunt tastes beautiful, sweetheart.” Suguru tells you as he lightly spanks your clit.

Satoru forces you to look in his direction as he holds your jaw, prompting you to open your mouth wide for him. He kisses you passionately, encouraging you to follow his lead and welcome to lewd fluids onto your own awaiting tongue. You gasp as the taste hits you, but before you can object, he covers your mouth and pinches your nose with one hand.

“Swallow it like a good little girl.” he orders, and you do.

He lets you go after that, though your body just goes limp in his arms. He helps you lie down next to Suguru as he spoons you, and your childhood crush peppers you skin in delicate kisses as you begin to drift off.

“I’m glad I went to see that shitty movie the other day.” Satoru smirks.

© 2024 rinhaler

@enchantedforest-network

[lost-and-ephemeral]

Series: In Her Shadow, pt.2 (ft. main trio)

Part 1 | Part 2

Slowly but surely she replaced you in his heart.

Pairing: Xavier x reader, Zayne x reader, Rafayel x reader (seperate)

Tags: angst, hurt no comfort, reader is not MC, breakup

A/N: I recieved a lot of comments and request asking me to continue, so here we are! I've tried my best. Ty everyone, I appreciate every message, even if it would be hard to mention every single one of them in this post. Also, if you want to be tagged in future fics, let me know!

-`♡´- MASTERLIST -`♡´- 

Rafayel

You began to notice that Rafayel was spending less and less time with you, choosing his bodyguard over you.

It wasn't obvious at first, yeah, but as time went on, everything became so noticeable that you couldn't ignore it anymore. Especially when he forgot about your plans with him and didn't even consider apologizing for it.

The smell of someone else's perfume in his studio, the way Rafayel would leave you at home and take her to all the important events because "you probably don't like spending time among journalists and annoying guests." It seems that he didn't even notice the moment when you were completely estranged from each other.

And all your attempts to talk to him about it ended with nothing.

"She's my bodyguard," he'd say. "No wonder I take her everywhere I go. Is there anything wrong with that?"

Yes, a lot of things were wrong.

But he was completely unwilling to notice it, and you were tired of collecting the shards of your broken heart from the floor day after day. Those warm feelings that brought a sense of lightness and happiness in your heart suddenly turned into pure torture.

You had to end it all, even if it'll hurt so much.

When you arrived at his studio this morning, you came face to face with "Ms. Bodyguard" herself. She was just about to leave, and didn't even hesitate to embrace your beloved. Right in front of you.

Maybe you would've exploded from all these negative emotions, if you had any strength left to be mad or to cry. But there was only emptiness in your heart.

You became strangers to each other.

"I'm breaking up with you," you said without any regret and pushed him away as he tried to hug you. "I don't want to be a second choice after your precious bodyguard."

"W-wait, why? What... But I didn't do anything!" he replied confused, apparently not realizing how much he's been hurting you all this time.

"Maybe that's the point. That you'd do anything for her, but not for me."

He looked at you with the same confusion in his eyes, trying to figure out if it was a joke, but you continued before leaving this place forever.

"You were everything to me, Rafayel. But for you, I was just a small episode of your life. I'm tired. You've been spending all your free time with her, like I didn't exist. It'll be better this way. Goodbye."

No matter how long he was calling your name, asking you to stop, to come back and talk with him, you didn't.

Zayne

Loving a cardiac surgeon with his busy schedule is hard.

But it's even harder when he no longer cares about your existence and spends a significant amount of time with his childhood friend.

After Zayne forgot about your reservation at the restaurant, making you feel like you were the last fool in this world, some more time has passed.

Yeah, he apologized. No, he didn't start spending less time with his "friend".

It's hard to count how many evenings you spent alone when he stayed late at work for her or was invited to a "friendly" dinner with her. But it happened often enough so finally your love turned into suffering.

At first you tried to convince yourself that you're too jealous and he's just happy to finally reunite with someone close to him from his youth. You care about your friends too, don't you?

But it only got worse.

All your plans were constantly adjusted to his friend's wishes. She wants to take him to a cafe at the same time you were planning to go to the cinema? "Sorry, love, let's reschedule our date for another day". You've made him his favorite dinner? Too bad, his friend already brought him dinner at work and he's not hungry.

Eventually you started feeling like he stopped enjoying your time together and just continued to exist in the same apartment with you out of habit.

Talking didn't get you anywhere, because Zayne didn't notice how much he was hurting you (or he simply didn't want to notice it) with his actions and only distanced himself from you even more.

At some point you felt like he put an ice wall around himself again.

He stayed late again this evening, completely forgetting his promise to spend time with you. You packed your things with tears in your eyes, ready to say goodbye to life with Zayne once and for all.

And he showed up at the doorstep of his apartment just as you were ready to leave.

"What's going on?" his voice didn't betray a shred of emotion. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to leave you and your lovely friend together so I don't have to be an unwanted addition to your life."

Zayne was taken aback at this statement and was about to say something, but you interrupted him.

"You were the one who brought happiness and comfort into my life. You were the one who made me feel loved and wanted. But now I realize that I wasn't good enough for you. Goodbye."

You walked away and closed the door behind you, leaving him all alone.

Xavier

Before, you without a doubt would've said that your relationship with Xavier was the ultimate dream.

But now it wasn't actually true.

Yes, your beloved still showed care and attention every spare minute he had. Just not to you. It seemed as if his colleague started to occupy his every thought.

During dinner, on a walk, after missions. He was always talking about her, how strong she is, and how lucky he is that she chose him as her partner. His eyes were shining with delight you had never seen before.

You were happy for him, but only until it crossed the line. Only until you started to feel like he was in love with her, not with you.

One day you found yourself completely miserable. Xavier texted you that he would be late because they had "decided to celebrate another successful mission". Except that you were usually the one he shared his joy with. But things have changed.

Even though you were the brightest star in his world, you were inevitably lost behind the glow of the Moon.

You were trying to be better, to be more interesting. Trying to reach an unattainable ideal. But you couldn't. After all, maybe you were never meant to be together if it turned out like this. Maybe you weren't enough for him.

You couldn't remember the last day you didn't cry. Sometimes alone, sometimes locking yourself in the bathroom after another conversation about this "super-strong collegue". But Xavier didn't seem to notice it at all.

"I thought maybe you'd be interested to know what happens during missions," he said when you brought up this painful topic.

And, yes, you were interested. But all you heard was, "She took down that Wanderer so easily, I couldn't take my eyes off her." Or, "she's so good with her weapon, it's amazing."

He distanced himself from you so much that you hardly spent any time together.

He wasn't even home the day you left.

Xavier sent you a message saying he'd be late again. As usual, with her. Even though he promised to have a movie night and you had already prepared everything you needed for it.

Maybe it's even better if you don't see the look in his eyes the moment you tell him you're breaking up with him. You packed your things and left a note on the table, next to the snacks you bought.

"Maybe in another universe I would be worthy of you so you could look at me with the same adoration. I can see that you enjoy spending time with her much more. And we should break up so you don't torment my heart anymore. Goodbye."

You glanced around his apartment one last time before leaving it forever.

♡ tags: @skyowlz @prettytemis @aishasreality @randompersonwhoexist @kreishin @reni502 @moonyzstarz @chin-chii

[v1sexual]

Could I pls have vi x reader who is a huge movie buff?

cinema ; vi (arcane)

request by : anon

note : as a huge movie buff myself, i absolutely love request. basing this request off me and my friend's reaction to 'long legs' by nicholas cage. spoiler : me and my bestie absolutely hated it *sighs*

content warning : swearing , op projecting and bitching about long legs

it's you and vi's monthly cinema date night. ever since you and her officially became girlfriends, going to the cinema monthly easily became a tradition. you've always been a big movie buff, something you got from your dad.

for tonight's movie, you and vi watched the latest showing for nicholas cage's new horror movie, 'longlegs'. it was highly praised online, it was even called "one of the scariest horror films". because of that, you and vi's expectations were through the roof.

"you ready for this shortcake?" vi whispered, her breath tickling your ear. you scoffed playfully and started cracking your fingers as the movie started, "i was born ready."

the movie ended around 10 minutes ago, you and vi sat inside her jeep. she looked at you expectantly, her eyes scanning your face trying to figure out why you've been dead silent. normally, you're already yapping away about the movie.

"sooo..." she started. "what are our thoughts..?" vi knew that she absolutely hated the movie, she just wanted to know your thoughts first. she's not gonna lie to you and tell you that she liked it just because you did though.

you closed your eyes for a second, taking a deep breath as if bracing yourself. "i... it-"

"i fucking hated it," you sighed, "i feel like we wasted money watching that piece of crap. i mean- i absolutely enjoyed the first part of the movie, i loved the foreshadowing, the literal devil in the details, the atmosphere-"

vi chuckled and stared lovingly at you, listening to every word that came out of your mouth. she's always loved how passionate you are when it comes to the things you love. with every hand gesture and facial expression you had, vi's smile grew bigger.

"- we were scammed! robbed! i've never been so disappointed in a horror movie, even fucking megan was better! i just- i don't even know what to say anymore." you let out an exasperated groan, flailing your arms before turning to vi. "what about you baby? what do you think?"

"i hated it too baby," vi said, her lips twitching into a smile. you sighed in relief, "i'm so glad- wait- you're not just saying that because i didn't like the movie right?"

vi snorted, rolling her eyes playfully at you as she started the car. "you know me better than that shortcake," she said. "just because i love you doesn't mean i'll agree to everything you say baby."

you nodded in agreement, "that's great, amazing."

silence filled the car again, your eyes were glued to your phone and vi was focused on the road. a couple of minutes later, she finally pulled in to your shared apartment.

"posted your review already?" vi asked, holding the door open for you. you smiled and nodded, holding your phone out to vi. "just posted on letterboxd, rotten tomatoes, and on my blog."

vi laughed, slinging an arm around you before pressing a kiss to your forehead, "you're such a nerd."

"you love that about me though," you said with an eye roll, your arm wrapping around vi's waist. your girlfriend sighed lovingly, "i love everything about you shortcake."

you giggled, nuzzling against vi, "i love everything about you too."

despite the intense disappointment you had for the movie, you and vi still had a great time which was the most important thing. the rest of the night was spent cuddling with her and binge watching ya'lls favorite show, and the horrible movie was soon forgotten.

note : when i said i projected i meant it *sigh* im sorry if you liked longlegs lol. anyways, hoped u guys enjoyed this one !

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Barbara Stanwyck (Ball of Fire, The Lady Eve, Double Indemnity)—I hope someone else has submitted better propaganda than I because I don't want my girl's prospects to rest on me just yelling PLEASE VOTE FOR MY TERRIBLE HOT GIRLFRIEND. She is a delight in everything! She is often a sexy jerk! (It's most of the plot of Baby Face!) Even when she plays a "good girl" (as an example, Christmas in Connecticut, which more people should see) she's still kind of a jerk and I love her for it! She won't take men's shit and she sure wouldn't take mine!

Setsuko Hara (Tokyo Story, Late Spring, The Idiot)— "'The only time I saw Susan Sontag cry,' a writer once told me, his voice hushed, 'was at a screening of a Setsuko film.' What Setsuko had wasn’t glamour—she was just too sensible for that—it was glow, one that ebbed away and left you concerned, involved. You got the sense that this glow, like that of dawn, couldn’t be bought. But her smiles were human and held minute-long acts, ones with important intermissions. When she looked away, she absented herself; you felt that she’d dimmed a fire and clapped a lid on something about to spill. Over the last decade, whenever anyone brought up her lips—'Setsuko’s eternal smile,' critics said, that day we learned that she’d died—I thought instead of the thing she made us feel when she let it fall." - Moeko Fujii

This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Setsuko Hara:

One of the best Japanese actresses of all time; a symbol of the golden era of Japanese cinema of the 1950s After seeing a Setsuko Hara film, the novelist Shūsaku Endō wrote: "We would sigh or let out a great breath from the depths of our hearts, for what we felt was precisely this: Can it be possible that there is such a woman in this world?"

One of the greatest Japanese actresses of all time!! Best known for acting in many of Yasujiro Ozu's films of the 40s and 50s. Also she has a stunning smile and beautiful charm!

Linked gifset

Linked gifset 2

She's considered by some to be the greatest Japanese actress of all time! In Kurosawa's The Idiot she haunts the screen, and TOTALLY steals the show from Mifune every time she appears.

She's considered by some to be the greatest Japanese actress of all time! In Kurosawa's The Idiot she haunts the screen, and TOTALLY steals the show from Mifune every time she appears.

"No other actor has ever mastered the art of the smile to the same extent as Setsuko Hara (1920–2015), a celebrated star and highly regarded idol who was one of the outstanding actors of 40s and 50s Japanese cinema. Her radiant smile floods whole scenes and at times cautiously undermines the expectations made of her in coy, ironic fashion. Yet her smile's impressive range also encompasses its darker shades: Hara's delicate, dignified, melancholy smile with which she responds to disappointments, papers over the emotions churning under the surface, and flanks life's sobering realizations. Her smiles don't just function as a condensed version of her ever-precise, expressive, yet understated acting ability, they also allow the very essence of the films they appear in to shine through for a brief moment, often studies of the everyday, post-war dramas which revolve around the break-up of family structures or the failure of marriages. Her performances tread a fine line between social expectation and personal desire in post-war Japan, as Hara attempts to lay claim to the autonomy of the female characters she plays – frequently with a smile." [link]

Leading lady of classic Japanese cinema with a million dollar smile

Maybe the most iconic Japanese actress ever? She rose to fame making films with Yasujiro Ozu, becoming one of the most well-known and beloved actresses in Japan, working from the 30s through the 60s in over 100 hundred. She is still considered one of the greatest Japanese actresses ever, and in my opinion, just one of the greatest actresses of all time. And she was HOT! Satoshi Kon's film Millennium Actress was largely based on her life and her career.

Barbara Stanwyck:

"THE leading lady of the golden age of hollywood. One of the only actresses to work independent of a studio, making short-term contracts that enabled her to make movies wherever she wanted. She had so much range, and could act in basically any genre. She's been rumored to be a lesbian literally since she was active in Hollywood; most notable is the rumor that she had a long time on-and-off relationship with famously bi Joan Crawford, her "best friend" for decades (They lived right next door to one another). She also lived with Helen Ferguson, her "live-in publicist" for many years. She was the quintessential femme fatale in Double Indemnity, and really pushed sexual boundaries in her pre-code films like Baby Face, and the famous screwball The Lady Eve, where she plays basically a downlow domme. Allegedly, when a journalist asked her if she was a lesbian, she straight up threw him out of her house. She even played a lesbian in Walk on the Wild Side"

"THE queen of screwball comedies. I adore her, I'd kill for her, I will cry if she's not gonna win this poll."

"listen ok she had awful politics she was a mccarthyist right wing wacko BUT she's so incredibly hot that i've deluded myself into believing i could fix her. if you see her onscreen she carries herself in a way that's just so effortlessly sexy AND she has just a stunning face. imo she was at her hottest in the 1940s but even as early as the late 1920s she had a rly captivating screen presence and just a beautiful face, and then post-1950 she was just irresistibly milfy so really she was just always incredibly hot. she was also an incredibly talented actress who was equally stellar in melodrama, film noir, and unhinged screwball comedy. the blonde wig they made her wear in double indemnity is notoriously silly looking but she still looks sexy in it so that's gotta count for something. i've watched so many terrible movies just for a chance at seeing her that i think her estate should be paying me damages."

"Not often thought of for her sultriness, Barbara Stanwyck was incredible in that she could actually choose to be hot if the role called for it, and then have a glow-down to look ordinary for another role. She wasn't the most beautiful or effervescent, but damn did she have rizz. Watch her with Gary Cooper in Ball of Fire teaching him about "yum-yum" or with Henry Fonda in The Lady Eve whispering huskily into his ear."

"She is always the smartest woman in the room. Watching her play Henry Fonda like a befuddled fiddle in The Lady Eve was a highlight of my life. Femme fatale in Double Indemnity, comedy queen in Ball of Fire. She can do anything."

"She was part of my gay awakening"

"SHE'S A PRE-CODE QUEEN. She did everything, drama, comedy. The most beautiful woman in the world to watch weep. Beg for to step on you with those legs. Fun Babs story: Ginger Rogers was offered the role in Ball of Fire but said, “Oh, I would never play that part, she’s too common.” So they called Barbara Stanwyck and they said “We offered this to Ginger Rogers but she’s turned it down, would you be interested?” And she read the script and she said; “You bet! I LOVE playing common broads. [link]"

[foreverisntenough]

‘OURS’

Summary: You were his and he was yours but what would it be like adding one more? Thrust into a whirlwind romance you never could’ve imagined that became your forever love. You continue building a new life across the pond with a very beautiful Scouser. A sequel to the ‘You’re Mine’ fic.

INDEX

Warnings: This series is 18+ and will contain fluff, suggestion, SMUT (unprotected sex,) pregnancy, parenting, mental health struggles, eating disorder, self doubt, body image issues, daddy kink, angst, alcohol consumption - not sure what else really… if i miss anything please lmk!

Note: Thank you for reading! Please be sure to like, comment, or message me what you think of the series! Try not to nitpick with any real pregnant/ baby logistics it’s better if you just read along happily.

P.S. Thank you so much for completing this series. 'You're Mine' and 'Ours' have been a massive labor of love and so much fun to write. I hope you have enjoyed all 60 chapters! There will be epilogue but until then... The End.

Chapter 30 - 'All Ours' | ‘Ours’ - The Final Part

word count - 14.2 k

Trent was on the carpet in your living room sat in between your legs as you were sitting on the couch behind him. Teddy was on the couch next to you sitting in Marcel’s lap as the four of you watched a NBA game on the TV that night. Maybe the four of you watching is a stretch. Marcell and Trent were watching. Teddy was bothering Marcel with irrelevant and unrelated questions. You were occupied playing with Trent’s hair, scratching at his scalp, occasionally massaging his shoulders. You were just keeping your hands on him. You couldn’t get enough of him lately. You still had yet to tell your families about the pregnancy. You were hiding in sweat sets and t-shirts of Trent’s lately attempting to hide your slightly now more noticeable bump. Trent leaned his cheek against the inside of your thigh as he kissed your knee. 

“Celly, know mama has a baby?” Teddy asked Marcel, looking up at him as she pulled at his shirt begging for more attention. You were just far away enough that you couldn’t clearly make out what they were actually talking about but also you were in such a trance focused on Trent you weren’t really trying to listen in either.

“Yeah, I know. You're Mummy’s baby, Ted.” Marcel cooed, confirming what he assumed she was talking about. He kept his focus on the game though. She scrunched her nose, annoyed he didn’t understand her and that he didn’t actually pay much attention to her.

“No, in her tummy, tay?” She tried to correct him, looking at him with a ‘duh’ type face like how could he not know she was talking about a new baby.

“What?” He whispered to her bringing his face close to hers but flicked his eyes to you and Trent with confusion over her. He was shocked to say the least. 

“A Celly.” Teddy attempted to clarify what she was talking about pulling his attention back to her. His eyes widened. It took him a moment before he was able to compute what she was referring to saying you had ‘a Celly.’ He debated for a moment if Teddy was like just talking nonsense or if she was serious.  Was he supposed to tell you and Trent he knew? What if you were not pregnant and he asked? He didn’t want to offend you. He grappled with the thought for a second.

“Ted, can I tell mummy and daddy what you told me?” Marcel asked her loud enough to draw the attention of Trent. He furrowed his brow but disregarded them and wrote it off as something silly Marcel and Teddy usually talked about. 

“Nooos, it’s secret Celly!” Teddy yelped. Trent shook his head with a smile at her not knowing what she was yelling about. Marcel dragged his finger between his lips and locked it at the corner's edge, signaling to Teddy he’d keep their secret but his mind was racing. He needed to know. A little while later you had gone upstairs and put Teddy to bed after Marcel and Trent said a lengthy goodnight to her filled with her giggles. When you came back down, they had moved to the cinema to play a game of FIFA.  You made your way there to find them but didn’t say anything or even acknowledge them really when you went in. You just cuddled up to Trent and fell asleep on him in the dark room. Trent made sure you were tight to him, laying his hands with his game controller onto your back keeping you so. As they played, sporadically he’d whisper ‘I love yous’ to you and kiss your hair. 

“Bro…” Marcel turned in his seat to look at Trent as they waited for the next game to load and start. Trent raised his eyebrows confused what Marcel’s impatient facial expression was for. “Sooo…” Marcel waved his hand at Trent to signal him to start talking but Trent gave no response. “You and Y/N….” He finally just spelled it out for his brother who was just taking too long for him.. 

“Oh... Fuck. Mate, it’s not obvious right? Were you able to just tell?” Trent babbled out quietly but relatively panicked. He looked down at your body and tried to examine you hidden under the baggy clothes trying to deduce if Marcel had been able to make out your bump visually. “We’re supposed to go to mums tomorrow. You think she’ll be able to tell? We were trying to wait to tell everyone.” Trent’s anxiety over ruining something you were fairly excited about doing washed over him.

“Wait so you are?!?” Marcel yelped out but bit his lips tightly closed after hoping he didn’t wake you with his excited outburst.  

“Yeah. We’ll she is or we are. I’m so happy.” Trent cooed gently, turning his focus to you. He smiled brushing his hand over hair before kissing your temple.

“Damn, that’s amazing. But nah, I couldn’t just tell. I had no idea. I don’t think mum will know either. Your daughter just yaps more than you and she told me.” Marcel smiled simultaneously taking a jab at Trent whilst letting him know that Teddy had spilled the beans. 

“Oh dammit, Ted. I knew she wouldn’t keep it to herself. Evidently, she doesn’t really understand a pinky promise and I guess the concept of secrets either.” Trent laughed, Marcel did along with him. Teddy wasn’t the most tight lipped.  

“Bro, this is sick… I’m so happy for you guys. How is she?” He nodded towards you. He wanted to make sure you were fine. If anyone knew the depth of how bad things had gotten it was Marcel. 

“Yeah, she’s been all good so far. She’ll do amazing. I know that.” Trent smiled again praying that you would be fine this time around. He didn’t know if he could bear an episode like the one that occurred after your pregnancy with Teddy. “Let her tell you about this though bro. I know she wanted to.” He instructed his brother because he knew that you had talked about the way you wanted to announce this to your families, especially Marcel. You wanted everyone to kind of have their own individual announcement, different from your fist pregnancy. In the following days Marcel kept his mouth shut as you began to send out customized newspapers announcing your baby. Each one including a snippet to keep it quiet till everyone knew.  Something along the lines of ‘Call us when you read the news. We can’t wait to meet our baby but until all our family and friends know… shhhh!’

“I’m fucking crying. Are you serious right now?” Winnie was balling over a Facetime after she had received hers. It naturally set you off right away.

“Yeah, going to have a little boy. I don’t know anything about them but I know he’ll be really cute.” You gushed with a giggled, starting to deep that you knew zero about little boys. It probably was a similar feeling that Trent had when you found out about Teddy. Things were going to be generally the same but also wildly different.  

“Baby, he’s just going to be like a little me. I swear interests will be fairly the same. You, food, sleep, footie. Simple boys.” Trent explained to you as he kissed your shoulder. You smiled hoping that was true but also knowing he was vastly oversimplifying things. 

“Do you have a name picked out? Are you keeping ‘TAA’ initials? Wait.. does Teddy know? What does she think?” Winnie rattled questions at you at lightning speed.

“Sheesh, Winn. Slow down please. Teddy does know. I think she’s on board but I don’t think she understands that after he arrives that he’s staying so we’ll see how that goes.” You laughed and Winnie hummed. “Names… Well, I have my opinion and T has his so I don’t know. To a degree I kind of felt like some little nod to dad would be nice.” You kept talking, explaining your current name debacle. You and Trent had talked about this at length. The only thing you had decided though was that you wanted to keep the initials ‘TAA.’ Aside from that, you and Trent just sat around throwing ‘T’ names at each other saying them all day. Trent often saying his suggestions as if it was an announcement at Anfield. 

“And number 6…” He paused his dramatics for a quick caveat. “I don’t want him to take 66 so thinking he can have half of my number.” He clarified to you and you nodded. “Trey Alexander-Arnold.’ Good, no? I kind of like it because he’d be the third ‘TAA’ kind of vibe I think.” He looked at you with a smile fairly proud of his idea. 

“So you’ll just ignore Tyler’s initials…” You cooed gently with a teasing smirk. Trent rolled his eyes wrapping his arm around your neck pulling you into his chest in a headlock. 

“You’re just so funny, huh?” He huffed, kissing your head and then releasing you. “Yes, I know. But this is also my family so he’d be the… You know what fine, scratch Trey. Now I’m not going to be able to think about anything but how salty Tyler would be. Thanks for sending me back to square one, baby.” He muttered with a huff. 

“Aww. I’m sorry, T. It was a cute name though but yeah square one, sorry. I will not listen to that argument for the rest of my life.” You cooed, caressing his cheek with your thumb. Back to square one you went, the list of names fluctuating between lengthening and shortening every couple days as you added some and ruled out others. It was all quite nice for the moment. Everyday was kind of exciting because you’d get a call from a family member or a friend who had received the news. You decided you’d hand deliver your announcement to Dianne, she deserved that. That said, Dianne aside, your only other delivery was to Marcel.

“Oh are you serious…” you whined. “You definitely already knew. I can read you like a fucking book. Who told you!” You yelped with a bit of a laugh leaning over your kitchen island slapping at Marcel. You definitely could read him like a book but it also wasn’t that hard. Lying wasn’t a strong suit in the family across the board but Marcel was particularly bad at it. His contrived reaction to your announcement confirming just that. 

“I’m sorry! Teddy told me in a backwards way and then I asked Trent but he told me you wanted to tell me so here we are. Can I know what you’re having now?” He asked with a cheeky smile that also ran in this family. 

“I still want you to find the gender with Ty. I just wanted to talk to you first. You’re important to me. You really are the best uncle to Teddy.” You began to start the conversation of why you wanted to hand deliver this news specifically to him. 

“And you’ve told Ty this, correct?” He interrupted you and you rolled your eyes subsequently. “I'm kidding, I’m kidding, go on.” He laughed not realizing how serious you were being. 

“You’re Teddy’s Celly and her best friend but in all seriousness how good you are with our kids aside. Even though this is exciting,I just wanted to talk about… me and you. Sometimes you and I get caught in banter and brother-sister type things which is fine, I love it, I just need you to know that I know what T does for me… Obviously, he and I’ve talked but Marce I also know what you’ve done for me. I wouldn’t have survived without your friendship. You are my best friend before you’re my brother, honest. You’re just really important to me and I want to make sure you and I are good because… I love you a lot.” You softly smiled at him hoping your confessional was going to be received well.

“Fuck… wow.” He choked out a little taken aback hearing your voice begin to shake a little. “I love you too. Y/N, I don’t think I ever thought you didn’t know what Trent does for you. You guys have one of the healthiest relationships I know. You value each other, I know that. You’re my best friend as well. I won’t be telling the boys that but yeah, I know.” You shook your head with a little giggle. Naturally, he wasn’t going to get soft on you without a little humor. “We’re fine. Promise. It just feels like I’ve lost him as a brother, sometimes. It’s strange that we went from messing about in L12 and now, I know I see everyone still, but it’s not just… us. Sorry it’s stupid.” You tried not to pout at him. Marcel gave you a little more than you thought he would. You were slightly worried he wouldn’t open up. 

“I’m sorry it feels that way. I can’t really totally wrap my head around his trajectory myself and what that must have felt like at home. I know how you feel though to a degree, having to share him feels wrong because he’s just our Trent and not this global figure to us but as much as we have to accept that’s kind of the way it is, you haven’t lost anyone.” You wanted to comfort him but you knew it was an abnormal situation. You just wanted to make sure he was okay. You really meant it, he was like a little brother.

“Nah, I know that as well. It’s been mad though to have all this happen and then like don’t get me wrong I love Teddy, she's goated, a pain in my ass, but she’s amazing and like I said I love you as well” He smiled prefacing his next statement. “But just on top of footie he’s just got this whole other life that I’m not in.” He puffed out some air, not happy to be admitting to his feelings. You weren’t a younger sibling but you understood and related to how bizarre it was to live in this very abnormal situation less than 1% of the world experienced. 

“Marce… You are very much so a part of this life, our life, and his life. I think you should tell him this kind of stuff because seriously, you and Ty are literally a part of every single day and if you’re not physically here bothering me, you’re in that annoying group chat that doesn’t stop. I totally empathize with this kind of grappling with growing up… I’m not saying you’re not grown, just that I know I really struggle to accept that we’re not what we were or maybe aren’t in the same place anymore, you know in our favorite places but we always find new ones. I found one with you all, no?” You smiled coming around the counter hugging him from the side, laying your head on his shoulder. 

“Yeah, course. New favorite places.” He mumbled out leaning his head onto yours. “I like our places together.” He muttered. 

“Yeah, me too. Those are the good ones. Your pain in the ass Teddy included.” You giggled, squeezing him once more before letting go. “What do you want to do for lunch before the match?” You asked, jumping back into normalcy.  

“Erm… anything really but Y/N, I am happy you know for you, and for him. I love your family and you being a part of our family, and obviously Ted.” Marcel shuffled in his chair. 

“I know. I know that.” You smiled, turning to grab your phone off the counter. After said match, the group chat lit up as it always did filling with who was coming over to your house. You needed a headcount, they never gave you for food but you always had a general idea, the usual cohort of rowdy boys in your cinema. Teddy gassed with the attention and chaos. 

“Come on, Teddy girl. You don’t want to be with all these icky boys anymore. We’re going to eat.” You cooed, coming to grab Teddy from them. She wasn’t going to eat what they were and she needed to eat her dinner at the kitchen table. You didn’t want to taunt her with whatever they were indulging in. 

“Too many, mama.” She told you, climbing off a couch next to George. He dramatically acted offended. You scooped up Teddy and kissed Trent’s head. 

“One more soon though.” Trent pipped up and you shook your head at his delivery.

“Sorry?” George looked at Trent with a confused look. It was a game of who could put together the dots the fastest. All of the boys in the room had received the newspaper announcements and said their congratulations but not until this moment, had anyone discussed your baby further.

“Shut the fuck up…” Marcel’s jaw slacked. He sat up in his chair. “Oh my days Project TAA, we get fucking project TAA. Bro!” He yelped. Thus the real chaos ensued as all the boys collectively freaked out. You gave a few hugs but you let them all pop off about Trent having a son.

“Do my boobs look bigger?” You asked Trent looking down at your chest before you looked at him. He gave you a cheeky smile. You rolled your eyes. You knew he wasn’t exactly complaining but you weren’t asking about his preference for the visuals he was getting in the bedroom, you were asking about how they looked in the top Prada had sent for you to wear to their show in Milan tonight. 

“Your boobs look amazing, baby.” Trent confirmed. They did look good. They were a bit more ‘plump’ than normal. He leaned back on his hands behind him on the mattress with a grin really enjoying how you looked. He licked over his lips.

“I can’t wear this.” You huffed unzipping the tight top. You stood there just in your sheer organza pants and satin high heels now topless. You watched Trent’s eyes light up. Your gaze flashed to his crotch unintentionally but the way he was sitting with his legs spread wide had your mouth watering. Your hormonal flares were getting the better of you. “I’m so horny for you, T.” You whined moving towards him, running your hands over his bare chest. 

“Wow, baby. I forgot this is what you being pregnant was like.” Trent smiled greedily, wrapping his arms around you pulling you to sit on his lap. His face coming close to yours. His lips ghosting over yours. 

“And I’m so sensitive now.” You moaned, pushing your lips into his for a passionate kiss. You moved his hands from your back around you and up your body, over your nipples. 

“Arrgh. We gotta go baby.” He groaned feeling your tits in his hand but trying to not let himself fall into your trap and get lost in you. 

“Come on, T, please.” You begged him. You didn’t need to beg. Trent would fuck you but you actually really did need to leave if you wanted to make it to the show on time and you still needed to put on a top despite Trent’s preference to your current state. 

“You love Prada. Let’s go sweet girl. You know I can’t say no to you so you have to get off of me.” He laughed at himself knowing the longer you stayed put on his lap with minimal clothing on the thinner and thinner his resilience was getting.    

“Fine, fine, but you owe me.” You huffed annoyed that he wouldn’t just take you right then. You were genuinely so horny for him you were praying you’d be able to make it through your night. “I’m just going to wear the sweatshirt.” You got off his lap and stood up looking around the room for the second option for a top for your look. “That still looks chic right?” You asked Trent awkwardly pulling the Prada Oversized cashmere and shearling sweatshirt over your head in an effort to not get any makeup on the cream color. 

“Nah, it looks sick baby. I like it.” Trent cooed standing up with a puff of air trying to collect himself. 

“Are you sure? I could always change.” You deviously smiled, beginning to peel the sweatshirt off again.

“I’m fuming right now that I’m saying this but can you please keep your clothes on f’me.” He gave you a massive smile and a disapproving head shake as he laughed pulling the fabric back down. This was a couple months ago and your horniness for Trent and your larger tits had not changed. Despite the World Cup being some amount of time away you found yourself in a similar situation trying on clothes, asking for his opinions but back home in your bedroom. Trent was in bed, he deemed your late night activity unnecessary but still entertained you. You were digging through your entire wardrobe trying to find just the right top. To no avail, you came out in a defeated huff. Trent smiled seeing you act so childish over something trivial. 

“C’mere baby. You’ll look great regardless. Just come to bed. It’s really not that big of a deal.” He tried to reason with you but it was a big deal… to you. Pulling together looks for a big tournament where you were playing a secondary role was insane but you did it nonetheless because well, you liked dressing up. Doing this insanity while pregnant? Not nearly as fun. 

“Nothing, and I’m actually serious, nothing looks good.” You complained, crawling on your bed towards him. You laid next to him and let him pull your tired body into his. He turned your chin to look up at him and kissed your lips. You hummed returning his kiss. “I’ve missed you.” You whined, pulling away from the kiss momentarily. 

“I’ve missed you more. Promise.”  He pecked your lips again as he tightened his arms around you. You hadn’t actually been apart long enough, only an away game, to warrant any sane person to say they missed one another but you two? You really did. The way his warm body felt against yours felt like heaven. His familiar comforting yet equally sexy scent encased you. His arms felt firm like he’d never let go and you didn’t want him to ever. His breath slowed as he looked deep into your eyes. You felt a shiver run up your spine staring back at him. “Turn around, baby.” He whispered close to you, turning your body in his arms letting your back now press into his chest. He leaned his head down and began kissing behind your ear. Your brain couldn’t really even process anything, you just felt this sense of relief and comfort being held by him in addition to this primal urge to get him to fuck you. You didn’t say anything. You let him work kisses down your neck as you pushed your ass against his hardening cock. “You want me to make you feel good?” He hummed as you let his hands roam over you, peeling your clothes off slowly. He relished in the sight of your now naked body against his. You tried to roll your hips back into him needing more. 

“T, fuck me, please.” You begged him desperately. His lips pulled into a teasing smile against your skin. It wasn’t long before he was sliding his length inside you. His hands all over you.

“You want me to fuck you? Show me how bad you want it then, baby.” He whispered against your neck. He steadied his hips behind you and let you move against him. You pushed further against him, taking more and more of his length inside of you. You were wet enough that his cock slid in without a struggle. Needy as ever you bounced your hips on your own, fucking yourself. “That’s right, baby. Good girl.” He smiled, enjoying your desperation. “Use me however you like to. Go on.” He groaned. 

“Please. T, baby. I need you.” You whined and he caved, giving into your pleas. You tipped your head back and Trent took advantage of the space returning his lips to your neck. He nibbled on your sensitive skin, scraping his teeth against you, marking you in the millionth way that you were his. You felt the knot in your stomach grow tighter as one of Trent’s hands slid to massage your tits cheekily pulling on your nipples. His other hand slid down in front of you coming to play with your clit and began to circle harshly around it. You couldn’t stay quiet as your orgasm got closer and closer. You clenched your pussy tighter around him. He moaned your name, unable to think about anything but you and how good you felt, the pleasure consumed all his thoughts.You shut your eyes as you awkwardly turned your head to kiss his lips. 

“Cum on my cock, baby. Be a good girl and cum f’me.” He sweetly whispered in your ear in contrast to his crass words. The pleasure started to be too much to control. Your pussy clenched tight around him as your body was filled with white hot pleasure. Your warm, wet, and tight walls were becoming too much for Trent to manage. “Can you do that for me, baby? Huh?” His thrusts were mind-numbingly perfect. Your eyes were shut tight but you nodded eagerly for him. Trent held you so tightly, completely flush against him. His pace had become relentless, his hips unforgiving as he moved, driving his cock in and out of you, consistently hitting a spot so deep inside you. Swiftly he was twitching and fucking you full of his cum.

“Fuck T…” you whined feeling his thrusts continue but slow. He emptied himself with slow lazy pumps. He didn't stop though as he came. He kept fucking you at a slower pace though as he watched his release seem from your pussy fucking it back into you untill you came once more for him.

“I love you so much, baby.” He hummed kissing your shoulder. He cuddled up to you keeping his strong arms wrapped around your frame. 

“I love you, T.” You sleepily cuddled back into him. He kissed the back of your head and pulled you closer into him.  You fell asleep just like that in the most loving embrace possible.

There was a World Cup friendly ahead of this summer’s tournament. In an unexpected turn of events the once very exciting information that the World Cup was going to be held in the United States was now one of inconvenience. By the end of the tournament you’d be a month or so out from your due date and you weren’t sure if you’d be able to fly risking the possibility of attending a potential final, should England make it that far in the tournament. You needed to have your baby in England. You could’ve tried to make arrangements to work around staying in New York for the birth but it didn’t make sense, at least not to you.

“I’m not even listening to them.” Lauren laughed keeping her eyes fixed on Trent and Jude filming a relaxed interview together for the England Youtube page. “Just want to sit on his lap, you know?” She cooed to you with a devious smirk, eyes staying put. 

“Laurennn…” You reprimanded her even though you knew Teddy wouldn’t have picked up on her innuendo. “Can you see dada, hmm?” You squeezed Teddy to you as she sat in your lap. You were sitting crossed legged on a turf pitch with your cheek pressed to the side of hers.  It was fairly hot and not an easy position for you to get in and out of but it’s where you currently were. Teddy nodded following your finger pointing to a monitor relaying the video of them as it was being filmed. “Fine, they look good to be fair.” You quipped to Lauren with a smug smile agreeing with her sentiment of wanting to sit on your respective man's laps as you watched Trent adjust in his seat raising his hips upwards. 

“What dada talking bout?” Teddy turned and asked you before letting her head fall back onto your chest lazily.  

“Footie.” You told her. Frankly, you hadn’t really been listening but you assumed that’s what they were on about.  She gave you a sort of blank ‘oh…’ in response that made you smile. “ What? You’re not interested in footie?” You asked her just interested in what was going on in her little brain before Trent and Jude broke out into a big laugh about god knows what. You couldn’t really hear their conversation because of their distance from you but the sound carried. They were yapping and laughing away as usual regardless. 

“Want to laugh with dada and Judey too, mama.” Teddy complained hearing and seeing their laughter. She was jealous. They looked like they were having so much fun and yet they weren’t including her. The ultimate offense. Your eyes were fixed on the monitor but Teddy was trying to see how far away she really was from where they were sitting to see if she could get there. 

“When they’re done, okays?” You cooed gently with a kiss to her hair. You gave her a cuddle and she sighed dramatically letting her body limply fall sideways on to Lauren’s lap as well. She was definitely inheriting some of Trent’s dramatics. 

“What? You’re just too cool to be with us now? You’re not having fun so you want to go be with the boys instead?” Lauren teased tickling Teddy’s tummy eliciting a giggly squirm before she pulled her entirely into her lap. “Wait, Ted. No, no, no!” Lauren hushly but sternly tried to call out as Teddy broke away from her in childish defiance running towards Jude and Trent. She even had the cheek to turn her head back to look at Lauren with a conniving smile as she did it. It was a jarringly similar grin to Trent’s that made you shake your head. 

“Think we’ve got an intruder, lads.” Jude announced, watching Teddy clumsily step over wires and cords around where they were filming. Lauren stood up and attempted to chase after her but the crew had welcomed her in before she could nab her. Jude laughed seeing Lauren’s face grappling between slight panic and a sly grin thinking this was a little funny. You were stuck as is because no shot you were going to be able to stand up on your own from your seat on the grass in time and you certainly weren’t going to run. 

“Oh, sorry.” Trent smiled, turning to see his little girl. “Are we able to cut for a second? This isn’t live, right?” Trent asked, really trying to remember if they said this was going to be streamed or something. They told him he was fine so he stuck out his arms to reach out for Teddy who was currently trying her best to navigate as carefully as she could through the cameras. “Sorry.” Trent apologized once more before grunting, picking up Teddy and lifting her over some equipment. “C’mere Ted. What are you doing, silly girl?” He asked her. She just shrugged with a giggle. 

“Did you get bored with mummy and Lauren? We do too.” Jude asked her teasingly with a wink to you and Lauren who was now just opting to sit back down. You couldn’t hear his question but you heard your respective names and rolled your eyes in sync. 

“Want to play a game with us?” Josh, the host of their interview, asked Teddy. Her eyes lit at the question. A game with daddy and Judey, absolutely… well and also with this stranger. Josh looked to Trent for his approval to include Teddy in a small game but very quickly he then turned to you for your opinion. You didn’t really know the context so you implied it’d be up to his discretion. “Come here sweetheart. Want to play a game with Jude and your daddy?” Teddy shyly hid behind Trent’s legs. 

“You’re okay, baby. Want to play or no, hmm?” Trent cooed, pulling one of Teddy’s curls straight and then letting it bounce back. She sheepishly nodded. He nodded his head towards Josh for her to go over. Teddy looked back towards you and you smiled and waved reassuring her despite not having really any idea what was happening. “Go on, yeah? We’ll have fun!” Trent reassured her. You knew she was fine as long as Trent was with her. Josh explained a game the crew made up on the spot. The boys would each have a guess and write what they thought the answer Teddy would give to a question on a white board. 

“Alright, so we’ve got Teddy Alexander-Arnold with us for our next little segment. Mum’s given us a go ahead?” Josh spoke to the camera and looked to Trent for confirmation. He nodded as Josh rattled on a further explanation of the instructions before they began.  “What do daddy and Jude do for work?” Josh asked, looking down at Teddy who had plopped herself onto the turf picking at it with her hands. She tilted her head up to give her answer when he gave her the go ahead. 

“Play.” Teddy responded nonchalantly and fairly disinterested before flicking her gaze back to the grass. Josh laughed a little at her answer. Trent wasn’t phased by her attention. He turned his board around to show the correct answer with a smug smile. 

“Nah, not having that.” Jude snapped annoyed. He leaned closer to Teddy. “Ted, but what do we play? You’re not saying footie? Also, I don’t know why I’m slightly offended by your answer.” Jude started to laugh at Teddy's belittlement of their careers teasing her reaching over to poke at her pudgy tummy.

“Yeah huh, Judey. Play footie with my daddy.” Teddy clarified with a giggle wiggling away from him. Jude had written ‘Footie’ on his board. 

“Hey, hey, hey. Can’t be trying to coerce her into an answer. She said ‘play’ not ‘footie’ you lost the point. Me and my baby bear just vibe different, mate.” Trent quipped back. Josh laughed a little at the back and forth. Trent leaned off his seat and kissed Teddy’s hair.  

“Alright, alright. One nil to Trent. Another question for you, sweetheart. What team do you think will win the World Cup?” Josh asked the next question and gave the boys a minute to write their answers. 

“Libpool.” Teddy answered with a bit more of a yelp and giggle, very certain and proud of her answer. Both boys turned their boards around begrudgingly with incorrect answers throwing their heads with a groan. Teddy looked at Trent confused and a little disheartened with their reaction.     

“Baby… Yeah, that’s a good answer but what team do Jude and I play together on. Where do we live?” Trent tried to clarify for her. As much as Trent was amazing if not perfect with Teddy he could never quite drop his competitiveness, he wanted to win. 

“Libpool, dada.” Teddy doubled down. Trent ran his hands over his face. Josh laughed. 

“Teddy girl.” Jude shook his head with a goofy smile. “I don’t play in Liverpool. You know I don’t live near you. We have to talk on the phone usually, don’t we?” He gently explained trying to direct her to the correct answer.

“This isn’t really fair though is it though because her answer is wrong.” Trent quipped trying to rationalize why the game wasn’t going to work. Teddy tried to complain, not really appreciating the fact that Trent was talking about her like she wasn’t there. 

“Mate, the game is guessing her answer though.” Jude snapped, interrupting Teddy. She stood up and grabbed his arm. 

“Judey! Listen!” All three boys laughed seeing Teddy come out of her shell a little more as she got more comfortable. “Live in England, tay? My mama not from there though but dada said can’t laugh at her.” Teddy segued into the unrelated topic about you. It was a discussion that came up recently with her of why you sounded different. You american accented words versus Trent’s made her laugh. 

“Right, we won’t make fun of mummy, alright?” Jude told Teddy and she nodded. “But you’re English still and that’s who you’re supposed to say is going to win, Teddy girl.” He explained to her as she pulled herself up to sit in Jude’s lap.They carried on with more questions and banter. It was a little while later on when she started to get tired. She wasn’t even involved in the video at this point. She just was chilling. You were gossiping away to Lauren who wasn’t really listening as much as she was just watching Jude be sweet with your little girl. Teddy started to get worked up in Jude’s arms though beginning to progressively get more fussy as she got more tired. 

“Uh oh! Want to just go be with daddy?” Jude cooed gently as Teddy began to start crying. She nodded sadly with a hushed ‘pleabs.” He kissed her before passing her to Trent’s outstretched arms. 

“Not having that?” Josh asked Jude with some cheek as Teddy continued to cry. 

“Nah, that’s why I love Ted. I just hand her off when she gets upset.” Jude laughed as Trent rolled her eyes as he whispered asking Teddy what was wrong. ”To be fair, she’s so chill more often than not. My only beef is that she won’t wear my Madrid jersey but I think that’s more of an issue I’m taking up with him.” Jude laughed with a smirk.

“Aw, baby C’mon. Going to be okay. Let’s go sit with mama, okay?” Trent cooed, kissing Teddy holding her as she cried ‘mama’ on repeat. “Can I just pop over to my wife quick?” Trent asked in the general direction of the men behind the cameras as he was already standing up. He knew that no one wanted to hear Teddy wailing before even asking. The director nodded. 

“Oh, is mummy asleep on daddy.”  Lauren giggled, bouncing Teddy on her hip walking back into your living room holding a glass of wine in her other hand noticing you. You’d passed out laying on Trent. She had come to stay for a little to spend some time with you and to help out with the nursery you desperately needed to finish.

“Uh huh… my mama lub my dada so um they um have baby.” Teddy explained squirming in her arms to put her down. Lauren bent over and placed her on the carpet. Teddy immediately took off running to the couch jumping on Marcel who had come over. 

“Yeah mummy has a baby. You must be sleepy like mummy though, no?” Lauren cooed carefully sitting herself on the white couch keeping her glass of wine steady. 

“Nos.” She giggled despite it actually getting close to her bedtime.

“I think you are…” Lauren cooed, pulling on one of her legs hanging over Marel’s lap. “Have to set a good example for your baby brother. Don’t want him to be like Celly do you?” Lauren teased.  

“The stray was so unnecessary.” Marcel quipped with an eye roll.   

“I like Celly, Lauwen. No bruber though. No tanks al zander arnol girls only.” Teddy explained through stumbling words, sitting upright hugging Marcel. 

“Yeah, you’ll still be Alexander-Arnold girls. Why don't you want a baby brother though? If you had a sister you'd have to share all your cute clothes like mummy has to with Winnie.” Lauren laughed.  

“Shares a generous word.” You slowly and groggily spoke coming out of sleep.

“Mummyyy!” Teddy squealed hearing you, crawling off Marcel towards you and Trent on the couch. 

“Hi baby. You’re so cute and so loud.” You laughed watching her make her way to you. “Come here, yeah?” You cooed bringing her into you and Trent.  

The following weeks were a bit hectic with the World Cup fast approaching. Trent was so busy and you just the same so it was fairly common that someone from your family helped out with Teddy. Frankly, you really needed to accept the fact that you might need a babysitter eventually because this was getting even more overwhelming as your due date came closer as well. Marcel had just begun dating this girl Gracie. Maybe ‘begun’ wouldn’t be the word considering you met her years ago and they had a whole situationship before this current relationship. She was sweet and you liked her. Cute, fairly meek, not in a negative way but she definitely was trying to “fit in” with your family so she wasn’t the most outspoken at the moment. It was a lot for you to walk into but for her it was a little different and slightly more strange. She’d actually known the Alexander-Arnold family longer than you did but since Trent was so successful and famous now it was almost an entirely new environment. That said, she definitely just wanted to be liked by all the people that felt like permanent stays like you… and Teddy. 

“Excuse me, my Celly.” Teddy reprimanded Gracie, moving her hand off of Marcel. She was attempting to make it clear that Marcel was hers as you all sat at a restaurant for lunch on a random day. Having someone with you and Teddy all day made such a difference so you took the liberties of going out for something fun and leisurely when you did.

“Okay, I’m sorry sweetheart.” Gracie gently apologized, running her hand over her hair. Teddy didn’t concede though. She just kept her unimpressed glare on her. Marcel laughed a little at Teddy’s upset and Gracie’s kindness. 

“This is my Celly. Tay?” Teddy yelled. Your eyes widened. You knew she was possessive of Trent and you but this was really the first outburst about someone else. It wasn’t all that surprising though that the someone else was Marcel though. 

“Teddy girl…” You cautioned her. That's really all it took. It was a tone she knew well. “Can we be polite please? That’s not very nice.” You asked her. You mouthed a ‘sorry’ to Gracie. You wanted to really tell her that jealousy was not the way to get a man. She frowned at you and then her face pulled into offense as she watched the biggest betrayal, Marcel wrapping his arm around Gracie.

“It’s okay, really.” Gracie assured you brushing off Teddy’s sass. You smiled and so did she.  “We can share him, yeah?” She gave a toothy smile to Teddy before pecking Marcel’s cheek. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back  

“Nooooo mine!” She yelled and you immediately looked at her with wide eyes and a shake of the head. You were fast approaching the delightful stage of toddler tantrums. Teddy was really well behaved but sometimes she just didn’t know any better way to communicate her feelings. She sat in her chair as her eyes welled with tears, upset with Marcel and Gracie and now upset she had done something wrong. 

“Oh my little teddy bear.” Marcel pouted at her. “Come here. You’re still my best friend, hmm?” He leaned over and tried to pick her up but her tears began to fall as she rejected him. 

“You’re okay, baby. Celly loves you, promise. Come sit with me. I got you.” You grabbed her out of her seat knowing she wouldn’t say no to you. She wrapped herself around your neck and sniffled. “You didn’t eat any of your chips, my cute girl. You love them. Want to eat some with mummy?” You cooed and she shook her head ‘no’ but she contradicted herself when she eventually turned back to the table to grab one of your plate. 

“I have?” Teddy asked Gracie sheepishly, reaching a chip towards her plate close to yours that had a bit of ketchup on it. 

“Of course, Teddy. I'll share with you” Gracie smiled and pushed her plate and thus the ketchup a little closer to her. She shoved her chip into the ketchup and then into her mouth with a greedy smile and a hum. You and Marcel exchanged eye rolls at her. She was very cute and always managed to get her way. 

“I’m fucking worried 25 hours a day.” You cried over the phone. You couldn’t even Facetime. You couldn’t bear to look at Trent right now. The World Cup did not end how you would’ve wanted it to but nevertheless Trent and Jude and a few other England teammates had stayed out in California for some time off. You had flown back immediately after the team was knocked out. You were so close to your due date you didn’t want to leave anything to chance, have any complications or be told you couldn't fly home after their departure in the Semifinals so you and Teddy were back home alone sans Trent.

“Baby… come on.” Trent groaned tired from his night out. “Just don’t deep it please.” It was like he forgot who he was talking to. Like the difference in your time zones wasn’t the only thing disconnecting you two. Trent rolled in the massive bed he was staying in really wishing you were in right now. He sighed, rubbing his hands over his face, disgruntled, not even sure how he had just got home. He was very drunk. It was maybe three or almost four am for Trent and late morning for you back home. It wasn’t how you anticipated your day starting and suddenly you felt the tides of your afternoon changing. 

“I mean who was there? Are there photos? Like why are you telling me this?” You rattled quickly in a panic after Trent had sort of unintentionally but intentionally filled you in on his night. They had gone to a club. Not your favorite thing in the world but you knew he was going out. What you were unaware of was that they were joined by… let’s just say a man who was a “promoter”  out in LA but that title really didn’t encapsulate what he did for a living. You knew nightlife. You knew it well in fact and you knew of this man and you knew that the England players request to blow off steam wasn’t just coming with bottles it was coming with bottle girls. 

“I don’t knowww. I just don’t want you to be caught out if someone says something shitty on twitter, alright beautiful?” Trent whined, throwing his head back into a pillow. You could hear other people in the house with him. He clearly was alone in his room or if someone was there they were dead quiet but you knew there were other people there.

“Well, why would they have something to say? What was happening?” You asked, feeling a bit nauseous and you weren’t sure if it was a symptom of your pregnancy or the vagueness of Trent’s borderline black out drunk phone call. 

“Nah, nothing baby. Wish you were here with me, you know.” He segued into another conversation entirely. You didn’t know if he intended to do this or if he was just drunk enough to not remember what he was talking about. He poorly attempted to convince you to have phone sex with him. You usually wouldn’t be opposed but like this? No. He was wasted, it was almost the afternoon for you, there was this weird tension and secrecy about what his night actually consisted of was putting you off. 

“Okay, can you just go to sleep for me, T and get some water before, please.” You tried to calm yourself down just thinking more about his well being and the pain in the ass he'd be when he’d inevitably call you complaining he didn’t feel well wanting you to baby him when he woke up after this. You tried to say goodnight but you definitely didn’t miss the female voices echoing in the house and one in particular calling his name. He knew. He knew you heard it as well. He was too drunk to process how to handle this appropriately. Another woman's voice calling his name close to four in the morning wasn’t a great look for him and it wasn’t a great feeling for you. For some reason it really bothered you that it was an American accent. He couldn’t think quickly enough to act or say anything before you had hung up. You must’ve hit decline 50 times after that. His vision blurred. Trent didn’t leave his room that night, he slept alone.  

“You know why I’m here.” Tyler gently spoke to you standing at your front door. You had waited for this all day after you’d seen the predicted photos emerge on football gossip sites alike. You didn’t want to see them but people would just DM them to you unprovoked. It was so invasive and so… sad. You did not want to see the thread putting together that the interior of the house from this LA model’s Instagram story was the same one in the photo Jude had shared. You didn’t want to see the screenshot of another stranger's story they posted unintentionally capturing a woman standing in between Trent’s legs at the club and you most certainly did not want to see the photo where you could not make out where his hands had disappeared to.

“Yeah, sure. On cue, no?” You snapped a little unfairly at Tyler as you let him inside. You rolled your eyes not really even greeting him. You knew Trent had sent Tyler over that night. You didn’t know what time it was on the west coast, you could’ve looked but you were ignoring Trent. You were raging. 

“You know it’s just misinformation nothing happened.” Tyler tried to reassure you that the photos were just nonsense but frankly this had happened one too many times. It wasn’t like you really had the image that Trent could actually go through with having sex with someone else but you just didn’t like that he was even entertaining another woman. It made you sick because you’d imagine he’d be comparing her to you.  

“No, I’m tired of ‘nothing happened,’ ‘it’s just a photo,’ ‘it looks worse than it was.’ It isn’t always about international footballer Trent Alexander Arnold’s image… Do you know what a fucking mug I look like? Sitting at home with his daughter and pregnant with his son? Why is he even entertaining it… why is he there to begin with?” You really lost it. You couldn’t hold it together anymore. Tears started to fill your lash line but you wiped them away with a tired gruff. You knew this was your brother in law but this was also Tyler’s job. 

“Y/N…” Tyler cautioned you trying to not let you get too worked up but the ball was already rolling. You couldn’t stop the crying. 

“No, I’m fucking sick of this. I can’t handle this” You sobbed. You gripped the kitchen counter top before just slamming your phone onto it and leaving the room. Tyler sighed letting you go, he knew you deserved to be mad. He wasn’t going to fight you on it but he was concerned by what you meant by your ability to ‘handle’ this. The thing that really sucked about being mad at Trent in these situations was that you would never keep him from Teddy. It was a little annoying that there had been multiple of these as well but you weren’t going to let his indiscretions or your anger towards him take away from her relationship with him. That said… you didn’t want to be there so you made Tyler call him with her before she went to bed.  

“Baby, where’s mummy?” Trent asked Teddy as he Facetimed Tyler who held her sitting on a stool at your kitchen island.  

“Um.. mama’s sad, dada. Sad in beddy, thinks.” Teddy babbled unknowingly, kind of spilling the fact that you’d really been upset over this. He knew that but knowing Teddy was conscious of it broke his heart all the more. Tyler’s eyes widened not realizing Teddy had even picked up on that.  “Why mama sad?” Teddy asked innocently.

“Mummy is tired.” Trent sighed. “Can you give her a big kiss from me?” Trent cooed kind of wishing he could just give you one himself.  

“Mate, you gotta get home now. This one was out of order.”  Tyler put Teddy down and readjusted in his seat. “She’s tired of your shit.” He quipped at Trent. 

“Ty, I didn’t do anything!” Trent yelped defending his innocence. 

“Bro, I’m not questioning that but they’re dragging her online, they’re dragging you. It’s a mess and you need to take care of your wife and your daughter. I’m worried about Y/N.” Tyler replied in a serious tone. “You lost and it was a shitty way to go out of the tournament but this was dumb. Get your ass home. You’re not 19 bro.” Tyler really drove home his point that Trent needed to leave asap. Tyler always had a delivery that made Trent shutter. He would never not make Trent feel young and naive. 

“Please come here, okay?” Trent trailed behind you in your bedroom when he returned to England days before he had anticipated. He listened to Tyler and left that night, returning the next morning for home. 

“T… I’m upset. Let me be upset. You can’t just make me change my mind to make you feel better.” You snapped turning around to look at him frustratingly. The only words you’d heard for the past couple hours were ‘I’m sorry’ and you weren’t all that convinced by them. 

“It’s not about me. It’s about our relationship. I’m sorry.” Trent frowned at you. He genuinely was apologetic, you knew that but it was almost agitating you more because he knew he had put himself in a stupid situation knowingly. It also was agitating you that you felt like you wanted to disappear realizing you were about to have a new born baby and embark on another fresh hell of your postpartum body again. You didn’t want to think about him with other women ever and certainly not right now given how you felt you looked.

“It is about you because who looks bad? I do and you're unphased. I’m upset Trent. It’s fine, okay? I let you do what you need to do. I get it you’re a ‘baller’ or whatever and you guys all love showing this sort of lifestyle.” Trent wanted to interrupt you and correct you. That wasn’t true. Trent didn’t really push that narrative but it just backed your point up a little better if he had. “But you know where I am… you know that I am carrying your fucking baby right now and your calling me what? While some girl is in the fucking house? Why is someone calling your name at 3:56 am? Tell me.” You tore into him remembering the exact time you’d hung up on him. “Why is there another American girl calling your name? Tell me about your night with her… Did you call me after… Did you call me because you felt guilty?” You started crying, gasping for breaths unable to control it.   

“That’s not fair. You know that’s not true or what happened here.” Trent pleaded for some sort of mercy but he knew he fucked up. You hadn't necessarily accused him of cheating, it was sort of hinted at but that wasn’t the point. You were upset about how shitty seeing his hands near another woman was making you feel about yourself.

“Fair! You want to talk about fair!?” You yelled between sobs. You stuck your hand out to distance him from coming any closer to you when he tried.

“Y/N… I’m sorry. God, I’m such a fucking idiot. I was just trying to be chilled and relax with the boys. I didn’t want to make a big deal because I was getting chirped for being such a dad.” He woefully tried to explain, unknowingly digging his hole a bit deeper.  

“Hey, hmm maybe because you are a dad.” You sarcastically rolled your eyes. “But you’re right… teammates over us always. Got it. Made that one proper clear.” You continue to sort of take digs at him for things that maybe weren’t the most accurate, and definitely a little too harsh  maybe. You didn’t feel that way but your insecurity about the photos and that familiar valley girl accent was haunting you. 

‘Hey, baby… the attitude isn’t necessary. I'm trying to apologize.” He looked at you both with a stern face not appreciating the jab knowing you two had to get through this but also absolutely terrified he’d upset you like this. 

“Well you shouldn’t have to apologize, you shouldn’t be doing this shit. You’re married, you are a father of two babies by the way. So, tell me about her? What’s her name?” You snapped as your emotions continued to run high. 

“I know! I know! And I fucked up. I don’t remember anyone they invited names, baby. Honest.” Trent once again took a misstep. Honestly, he was never great in arguments. You were. Your tactics weren’t the most fair but they were poignant.

“Oh, that’s brilliant you did all this for women you can’t even remember their names. Be honest and don’t fucking lie to me… did you touch her?” You made yourself feel sick asking him as you reimagined the blurred images. 

“Baby…” He didn’t want to talk about this. Tyler was right Trent was not 19 and this was not some silly cheating scandal. Trent probably shouldn’t have been in that position but he would never cheat on you. You knew that and he knew that you did. It had nothing to do with him, it was more about the ‘woman.’ You were playing that angle though because it was easier to rationalize but both you and Trent knew that this anger and this conversation was stemming from your insecurities. 

“Did they touch you?” You pushed for him to answer you. “Tell me. Did you get tired of the fact that while I carry your child for 9 months I don’t look like some Insta baddie worthy of a post World Cup party?” It was a big unfair blow. Trent felt like you punched him in the stomach. He shut his eyes, swallowing his need to defend himself and his pride. 

“No, absolutely not…” He whispered, throwing his head trying to refrain. 

“Did you touch her?” You asked him and he paused for a bit longer than you would’ve liked. “Oh my god… fuck you. Honestly.” You cried falling into more sobs as you sat on your bed dropping your head into your hands.

“Y/N, let me at least fucking answer. No… Fine, a woman tried and I told her to get away from me. That's what the photo is. I was moving her off me, alright?” He explained.  It should’ve made you feel better but it didn’t. It wasn’t enough to shake the idea that your body currently couldn’t compete with some LA model’s.

“Why T… Why would you? Fuck… Am I not enough, you needed to seek out more? You want me to be this confident strong woman for Teddy and it’s things like this that just rip me apart. My husband, her father had other women practically in his lap… and I’m… I’m just. I can’t manage it.” You’d gotten to a place where you would always remember the pain and trouble you endured mentally from your damaged self image.You could forgive yourself, but you’d never forget all the insecurity and hatred and right now Trent’s night in LA had you remembering every piece of your past. You’d healed a lot. It was one of those situations where you had a hard time accepting your own treatment of yourself and the only person you could fault was yourself. Trent said no. It wasn’t even a competition for Trent. He’d pick you everytime but you were taking this out on him.

“You… you are more than enough. I never want anything but you. I'm so sorry I made a mistake even going but I definitely didn’t make a mistake getting myself out of there. I called you in my room, alone because I missed you, baby. It was a lapse in judgment. I’m a fucking idiot putting the most important thing in my life at risk for my ego to be cool for them.” He cooed sitting down next to you. You caught yourself sat on the bed now beside him in the mirror. It was the perfect storm. Emotions high, Trent’s error, pregnancy kicking your ass. You didn’t recognize yourself. You saw a woman who was overweight you’d never met. The problem was that you were underweight and no one could convince you otherwise. It was obsession and all you could think about as Trent yapped a heartfelt apology was that her arms, that women standing in between your husbands legs was that her arms looked thinner than yours, her collarbones raised a bit more. You weren’t sure if you really were upset about their positioning or her presenting the idea of a more attractive option to Trent. 

“T… I worry every time you leave. I really do trust you… I do but it’s like sickening sometimes knowing the temptation that is literally thrown in your lap.” You had been on a relentless and unattainable pursuit of visual perfection and that fear and distortion you hid in and it came storming back. 

“There is no temptation. There is no one that is you. No one could ever be you. Nothing could fill the void you’d leave behind if I didn’t have you. You are my world. I would crumble without you.” He began to cry.  “I’m so sorry.” He leaned his head on your shoulder attempting to take a deep breath. Trent hated arguments. He hated confrontation, and he hated that sometimes he felt like he couldn’t win against your disordered way of thinking. 

“It’s fine, T…” you whispered consoling him, cupping his cheek. You’d made progress with your health but it definitely felt like you’d revert back to old ways of thinking the second some sort of comparison was thrown at you and that’s exactly what this was. 

“It’s not, baby. I love you. God, I fucking love you.” Trent whimpered trying to reel in his own emotions. He kissed your shoulder and it made you take a deep breath. 

“I love you.” you whispered again. The words were tiny and fragile. Trent pouted seeing your tear stained face. His pout turned into a soft frown when he looked up at you. You both sat there in and out of tears. Trent was a light that gave you a strength you weren’t sure you even wanted to have sometimes. He gave you a happiness that you weren’t sure was even humanly possible and you hated that you questioned your worth despite not only the love he gave you but the belief and support. “Please, don’t stop loving me.” You barely were able to mutter out. Trent let out a defeated breath and pulled you into a hug. “I don’t think I can do it without you. Sometimes I think that this unconditional love I have for you makes me feel more insecure because I just want you to be happy and if that’s what someone else does for you. I’d let it happen” You shamefully admitted.

“Stop, baby. Never could someone make me as happy as you. I need to be better but.. You also have to be better for me. It kills me when you think like this.” Trent sighed. “I need you to know that that’s insane. I’d be insane to want anything else but you. I’m so sorry, baby. I never want to lose you.”  You could tell he was about to rant. 

“Please just shhh, baby. I don’t need an apology from you right now. I just need you.” You explained calmly and honestly just needing your husband, your Trent to hold you and so he did. You stayed quiet for a long time after that, moving to lay on your bed. 

“T… Is it okay if we don’t have sex tonight?” You sheepishly asked. You weren’t sure why you were asking. He never pressured you. You just weren’t sure you’d be able to stomach it still kind of fixated on your own insecurities. 

“What? Yeah, course. You haven’t been doing it lately because of me right? You’ve done it because you wanted to, yeah? Baby, whatever you want, I’ll do.” Trent cooed, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“No no, I’ve been fine. I just… I just want to be with my best friend tonight. I’m just a little tired and still a little sad.” You told him, hiding your face in the nape of his neck.  

“I’m right here, baby. Never ever leaving you. Won’t ever leave. I never want to hurt you and I’m sorry I did. I love you so much.” Trent cooed, pulling you into a tight embrace. He rested his chin on top of your head. 

“You can’t imagine how much I love you.” You spoke. Your voice muffled by your proximity to his skin.  

“I think I can…” He smiled, pressing a kiss to your hair. You were quiet for a moment before he pulled your face off him and held your face in his hands. “Baby?”  He cooed. You sympathetically smiled at him, still a little sad. “I don’t want you to be anyone but yourself for Teddy. If she’s anything like you when she’s older she’ll be perfect to me. Even now, when I see glimpses of you in her. It’s everything to me. That’s all I want and when I think about our little boy and Teddy the most important thing is that they know how much I love you. I just want them to not just hear me say it or see it, I want them to be able to see and feel how much I love their mum, how much I respect you and believe in you, how beautiful you are, how amazing you are and I want them to know that. We are so so lucky to have you, baby.”  You smiled and a few tears escaped. He wiped them off your smooth skin. “Tell me something.” He sat up. “Can you do me a favor?” He smiled back at you. Your brow furrowed a little surprised given the circumstances. You were about to be having a month full of gifts and you were sure about that. Post fight? Yeah. Before leaving for preseason? Surely. Push presents? Definitely. You doing something for him? Questionable. “Tell me what you think I love about you.” You shook your head in defiance. “Yeah, go on.” He nodded at you.  

“T, I don’t know!” You whined with a pout not wanting to do this. 

“Well, what do I tell you I like.” He smiled, leaning over kissing your shoulder.  

“I don’t know… my ass.” You sheepishly threw out one. He hummed and nodded for you to continue. “This is stupid.” You muttered but he gestured for you to keep talking. “My tits.” He nodded with confirmation. “My lips.” He hummed again with assurance. “My toes.” You laughed and he laughed with you knowing he recently commented that he liked your white pedicure. You were grasping at straws for ideas.  It wasn’t that Trent didn’t tell you things he liked, in fact just the opposite. 

“You’re sort of right. But baby, you could literally name any part.  I love every fucking inch of you inside and out. Your missing volumes of things I love about you. You know me, I don’t fucking like to lose and I’m not loosing this. I’m going to get you to love you the way I love you.” He wiped his thumb over your lips with a glint in his eyes. “I wish you could just see the way we see you. Be brave for me right now. Tell me what you thought when I was in LA. Like mouth off, baby. You need to learn to back yourself. Give me a ‘you’re a fucking idiot because I’m sexy.’” He gave you a cheeky smile knowing this was something you wouldn’t want to do but hoping you’d do it for him. You thought for a moment and smiled. 

“You couldn’t have created a prettier baby with anyone else.” You smiled back at him. He squinted at you. It was a little bit of a passive one. You really we’re complementing both Teddy and him in the process. 

“I’ll take it butt I was looking for more of a ‘I’m the lengest girl you’ve ever seen, you’re lucky I gave you a chance.’” He laughed and you rolled your eyes. “I want to hear one of these everyday. Remind me and yourself everyday that you’re it baby.” He kissed you a few times. 

“Thank you for loving all of my imperfections.” You smiled into the kiss. 

“They are not imperfections, they are what makes you everything you are and everything I’m madly in love with.” He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you tight into him. He swayed you back and forth with a hum and a few kisses. “The fact that I get to just be in your presence. Get to experience you in my life and be a part of yours, it’s the biggest blessing. I have never seen a more beautiful person inside and out, baby. Please don’t ever forget that. You’re incredible.” He kissed you a couple more times. You muttered out a ‘thank you.’ “Do you believe me?” He brushed his nose against yours. 

“I think I am starting to. I like… life with you. Our life. I feel like I used to dread the lulls and now it’s like there could never be enough time in this life with you or my babies. I just crave more of it all. You made me like to live” You giggled a little. “Sorry, I know that sounds dramatic.” You shyly smiled.  

“Good.” He kissed once more, sealing how much he loved you. Things would always be hard but progress was being made slowly and you think that’s what made you so upset. It felt like you took a few steps backwards when Trent went to LA but as he held you, you knew things were better than they’d actually ever been. You believed what he was telling you. 

“Want to go see mama and dada, Celly.” Teddy huffed, kicking her dangling legs back and forth off a chair in a hospital waiting room. You had gone into labor hours ago. Teddy wasn’t even there the whole time but she was getting restless. 

“Nah, you don’t. You want to hang with me, yeah?” Marcel laughed, pulling her towards her. She wiggled out of his hold. 

“Nosss humph.” Teddy huffed again, folding her arms over her chest. She was still holding on to some serious resentment towards him because of his relationship with Gracie.

“What’s with the attitude?” Marcel laughed a little more. He shouldn’t but he almost fueled her behavior because he thought it was funny the way she huffed about but still managed to remain really cute. 

“My Celly only, tays?”  She repeated her statement that had been on a loop lately to him. She wanted him to understand that Gracie had to go in her mind. That wasn’t really an option nor her decision but she’d try. 

“Sweetheart, come on! You're always going to be my best friend, I promise.” Marcel reassured her, picking her up and placing her on his lap. She smiled greedily and giggled happy with his confirmation. “Alright, so we’re good now?” He asked her and she nodded content that she was now sitting with him. “Good. I have some questions for you. How small do you think he’ll be?” He asked her just to keep her busy for god knows how much longer. 

“Small.” Teddy simply confirmed. He hummed, agreeing.  

“What do you think his name will be?” He asked her another question, one of many he was starting to think of.  

“Tom.” Teddy answered again very matter of fact. She said it as if she knew that was 100% correct. 100% going to be your son’s name but Marcel knew that wasn’t going to be the case. He was pretty sure he knew the names you’d narrowed it down to and ‘Tom wasn’t on that list. 

“Tom? Why?” He laughed a little at her. “You know what? Okay. My nephew Tom Alexander-Arnold. Got it.” He smiled as she nodded, verifying.   

“Did so well sweetie. I’m so proud of you.” Dianne cooed, giving you a gentle hug. You smiled at her with tear filled eyes. She and your mum were the first to come into the private room to meet your son. Early that evening you and Trent welcome your baby boy Theo James Alexander-Arnold into the world. He was perfect and there were no disagreements with that fact. Thankfully this time around both of your families were here and on time for the delivery, Trent included. 

“Let’s see him then.” Tyler came into the room shortly after to meet little Theo. You offered if he wanted to hold him but really you were having trouble even being a foot apart from him. “Ready to play in the prem, mate?” Tyler smiled running the back of his finger over his chubby cheek. This was already a running joke before you even had Teddy that there was this predetermined destiny for a child of Trent’s to play football but it really kicked off once all the boys in your life found out you were having a son. It was all in good fun of course but at the moment you were really emotional. You pouted at Trent sadly. He took Theo back from Tyler but not before giving him a reassuring nod that he was sure that that was going to happen. He kissed Theo and placed him in your arms softly.  

“No, he’s going to stay with mummy forever.” You held Theo to your skin letting his head rest against your chest as you began to cry again. “Never ever leaving my perfect baby boy.” You frowned looking at how adorable he looked. Trent hushed you sliding next to you on the hospital bed, taking a seat. “He’s so perfect. I love him.”  You explained to him but kept your eyes locked on him.

“Yeah, I know, baby. You did so well. Look at him. I actually think he looks a little like me.” Trent teased running his hand gently over his son's head.  You started blubbering crying. Trent let out a sympathetic breathy laugh at you. “Hey, just joking. It’s okay.” He kissed your forehead. 

“He looks like you. He looks just like you, T and he’s perfect… and beautiful.”  You kept crying. You were a mess. You don’t know why you felt so protective this time around. Of course you did with Teddy but you were also slightly terrified having it be your first pregnancy. 

“He’s pretty cute, huh?” Trent asked you inspecting your little boy. You nodded. Trent was emotional after Theo was born. He was balling in fact. 

“I’m so proud of you. You did so well, beautiful. You’re did so amazing.” Trent kept his lips pressed to your hair. You could feel him shake a little. He was crying. He was having a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that you had created one more little miracle that was finally in your arms. Theo Alexander-Arnold was an exact replica of Trent, marginally more than Teddy even was. You could already make out the little dimples indented in his cheeks. His nose, the shape of lips, everything was perfectly matched and perfectly cute.  “He’s everything baby. I’m so in love with him.” He cooed, eyes full of tears as he ran his hand over Theo’s head. “I am so grateful for you and all the sacrifices you’ve made for us and for him. I love you so much, beautiful.” He whimpered, leaning over more to see him. He gently nudged his nose against Theo’s tiny identical one. Theo batted his eyes open and Trent sucked in breath. The same perfectly warm deep brown eyes he had looking back at him. He fell in love instantly, completely in awe.   “He’s so beautiful. I can’t believe we made him.” You cried through a smile tugging at your lips as you inspected the tiny cherubic figure in your arms. Trent looked at you. You were absolutely glowing. Your eyes were tear stained but shining bright, filled with love. You were flush but your skin had never been softer. You were perfect. His heart swelled to the point where he got a little nervous it was possible it could burst. He would do anything for you and that little boy, Teddy too. 

“Shhh, baby. You’re okay. Just close your eyes for me, alright? Can you try to rest for a little while?” He asked you. You initially tried to say no  “Your boys will stay right here with you, I promise.” You gasped in a breath hearing ‘your boys’ for the first time in your life starting up crying again. Trent delicately took Theo out of your hold.

“Oh my gosh… You guys are making me cry stop.” Winnie cried along with you sitting in a chair in the room. Having missed your first birth she was a mess seeing you. Trent rolled his head to see Winnie pouting looking at you two.  

“Okay.. Okay.. come on though. Let’s go see mummy and daddy and your new brother.” Marcel cooed to Teddy holding her hand coming into the room. 

“Mummy matter?” Teddy yelped out too loud despite Marcel’s earlier instructions to be quiet. He laughed, shaking his head at her disregard once she saw you laying in the bed with an IV in your arm. She ran to the side of the bed Trent was seated on and he smiled with a laugh as she attempted to use him to climb onto the bed. “You tay?” She asked you, concerned. 

“I’m okay, Teddy girl. Come here, baby.” You smiled and reassured her. Winnie picked her up to help Trent and placed her on the bed between you two. “Can you say hi to your baby brother?” You asked her quietly. She tilted her head actually taking a closer look at the swaddled baby in Trent’s arms she hardly noticed before. 

“Hi baby. Is my Celly?” She asked you sitting up to peer into Trent’s arms that made you laugh a little. 

“Yeah, but this is your baby brother, Theo. Have to look after him and be the best big sister for me, okay, baby?” You cooed, running your hand over Theo’s head gently. Trent reached towards her and pulled her onto his lap with a kiss to her head and helped her hold Theo in front of him.

“Oh Tio… hmm.” Teddy spoke looking at the baby in her arms. “Hi Tio, we can share my mummy, tay?” She cooed kissing him. She was so sweet and gentle it made you start crying again. Winnie quick to follow. You guessed for the foreseeable future he would be ‘Tio’ to Teddy as opposed to ‘Theo’ with an h.

“What about daddy? Gonna share me too?” Trent asked her, dropping his head to press the side of his cheek to hers looking at Theo. 

“Nos tanks.” She replied with zero hesitation. Very sure of herself that daddy was not going to be on the table yet but she’d settle sharing you. 

“Teddy, can you watch mummy for me? I’m just going to get her a drink from the kitchen quickly, okay?” Trent asked Teddy standing up from the couch. A few days passed of having Theo in your lives and you were exhausted. You had fallen asleep next to Teddy. Theo was in a bassinet. Trent didn’t really need her to do anything but it’d make her feel important. It was important to make Teddy not feel left out despite all the focus on him. He could see and hear Theo from the kitchen and you’d be fine. You needed sleep.  

“Tay, dada.” Teddy confirmed plopping her head onto you. You shuffled a little maternally knowing it was your little girl without a thought. You pulled her into you instinctually.  

“Dada, mummy won’t let goes.” Teddy complained a little while later after Trent returned and you still hadn’t released her. She was getting bored.  

“Oh, I’m sorry baby.” He laughed. You looked happy with Teddy but he knew she was getting restless. He kissed your cheek a few times settling behind you before leaning to whisper into your ear. “Can you let go of our Teddy bear, please.” He smiled, flashing a wink up to Teddy. She giggled when you reluctantly let go of her. “C’mere. Can give me a cuddle instead, yeah?” Trent cooed pulling you back into him burying his face into the nap of your neck, kissing your skin. 

“Hello big sister.” Dianne cooed as Teddy ran to the front door to greet her after she let herself in to your house.  

“Nana shhh! Mama sleep with dada and baby.” Teddy explained to Dianne pushing her finger flush against her lips signaling her to be quiet. 

“Oh goodness. I’m sorry, are they upstairs?” Dianne asked her, lowering her voice. You knew Dianne was coming over but of course, she didn’t know what room you’d be in. She smiled, letting Teddy take her hand and drag her into the living room where you were after Teddy answered a simple ‘nos’ to her question. 

“Hey mum.” Trent lowly whispered, sitting up a bit but keeping you in his arms. “Sorry, Y/N just finally is sleeping. I didn’t want to get up. I’m not sure the last time she slept so…” Trent gave Dianne a sympathetic smile. 

“It’s good for her to rest. Let me see that beautiful boy. Looks just like daddy, huh?” Dianne gently picked up Theo from his bassinet as he began to wake. “Teddy girl, come with me and Theo to get you a snack. Want to come with us to the kitchen?” Diane asked Teddy who had just plopped herself on the carpet. Dianne winked at Trent knowing it’d probably be nice to just have a moment with no kids even if it was only for five minutes, even if they were only in the other room. 

“Hi…” You pouted as you woke up exhausted in Trent’s arms. Your eyes fluttered open more as you nuzzled into him until panic rushed through your entire body. “Wait! Where is he? T…” You looked at him terrified, almost on the verge of tears. God, you were so tired. 

“Baby, he’s with my mum. He’s okay. You’re okay. I got ya.” He cooed gently, kissing your lips. You nodded relieved. He leaned forward a little more and you thought he was going to kiss you again. You tilted your head ready to let your lips meet. He didn’t though. Instead Trent ran the tip of his nose against yours. You left out a shaky breath as he pressed his forehead to yours. “I’ve got you, I’ve got Teddy, and I’ve got Theo. Promise I will take care of all of you.” He whispered. You felt your heart falter hearing him. 

“We’re so lucky to have you daddy.” You smiled. You were going to say more but you heard Teddy’s giggle along with the scamper of your dogs come rushing out of the kitchen. Suddenly Theo’s cries began. Trent cupped your cheek and ran his thumb over your skin. He gave you a cheeky smile. He sat up and you sighed as he pulled you with him. 

“Where you going baby bear!” Trent cooed, reaching out and nabbing Teddy mid run swinging her off the ground. Her giggles continuing. You got up and took Theo back from Dianne as they entered the room and calmed him down. Trent came to you with Teddy in one of his arms and pulled you and your little boy into them with his other. “They're ours, baby. All ours.” He laughed a little and you sighed before he pecked your lips. You smiled up at him with a happiness you never wanted to loose and returned the kiss.

•

Thank you for reading! Please like, comment, or message what you think of the chapter and the entire series 🤍

I cannot believe the series is officially over. I really can't express how much I loved talking about this with anyone that has messaged. The first part of The Epilogue is out now! I hope the official conclusion will do Y/N and Trent's story justice.

The End 🫶🤍✨🧸

[bradleysass]

Butter - word count: 477 - Starchaser - @leeny-leens

James Potter was many things: charming, brave, annoyingly optimistic. But to Regulus Black, he was also wildly ridiculous in ways that defied explanation. Case in point: the current state of their “low-key” date night.

The plan had been simple: a movie at the shabby cinema downtown where the tickets cost less than a galleon. James had insisted on it, claiming it was authentic. Regulus, against his better judgment, had agreed, mostly because he found it impossible to say no to James’s imploring puppy eyes.

What he hadn’t agreed to, however, was the mess currently unfolding in the sticky-floored theater.

“What is that?” Regulus asked, eyeing the Frankenstein’s monster of a “cup” James had placed in the cupholder between their seats.

“It’s our drink,” James said brightly, sitting back and shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth. “Well, technically, it’s a repurposed popcorn bag. But genius, right?”

Regulus pinched the bridge of his nose. “James. Why does our soda smell like butter?”

“Oh, that’s the best part!” James leaned in conspiratorially. “The butter flavor seeps into the soda. Adds character!”

“Adds vomit, more like,” Regulus muttered.

“Don’t be so dramatic,” James said, nudging the bag toward him. “Come on, try it! Sharing is romantic, remember?”

Regulus stared at the grease-stained popcorn bag, which was now precariously half-full of soda, condensation pooling around its sagging bottom. Against every ounce of his better judgment—but unable to resist James’s stupidly endearing grin—he took a tentative sip from the straw sticking out of the corner.

The taste hit him like a punch to the face.

“James,” Regulus said, his voice flat, “this soda tastes like butter. And shit.”

James cackled so loudly that the elderly couple three rows down turned to glare at them. “It’s an acquired taste!”

“It’s a crime,” Regulus shot back, shoving the bag back at him. “Why didn’t you just buy a proper drink?”

James shifted in his seat, suddenly looking sheepish. “Because, uh… I didn’t want to spend my inheritance on snacks?”

Regulus blinked, momentarily speechless. “You’re joking.”

“Nope.” James grinned, though it was a little crooked this time. “I mean, it’s not my money—it’s my family’s. Feels weird throwing it around, you know? Plus, this way we get to be, like, creative!”

Regulus stared at him for a long moment, trying to decide whether he wanted to throttle James or kiss him. Possibly both.

Instead, he sighed and leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms. “You’re an idiot, Potter.”

James, taking this as permission to steal the armrest, leaned against Regulus’s shoulder and whispered, “But I’m your idiot.”

Regulus rolled his eyes but didn’t push him off. The lights dimmed as the previews started, and he couldn’t help the faint smile tugging at his lips.

The soda was disgusting, the theater smelled like old carpet, and James was a certifiable menace.

[auras-moonstone]

Hi beautiful, are you ok? You could write where Ethan has a "best friend" who is really in love with him and purposely creates a situation where he is confused who to believe, leaving the hurt reader not wanting to see him for a while. It can be a anguish with a happy ending, please :) thank you.

hi! i’m okay, hope you are too💖 this turned out to be longer than i expected, hope you don’t mind! enjoy <3

hell is when i fight with you — ethan landry

word count: 3,227

pairing: ethan landry x fem!reader

summary: ethan takes y/n to his hometown to introduce her to his family and friends. kara, ethan’s best friend who is in love with him, makes up a lie that makes the couple fight.

WHEN ETHAN INTRODUCED Y/N TO HIS FRIENDS AND FAMILY, SHE FELT HER HEART MIGHT HAVE BURSTED FROM HAPPINESS. She had been in relationships before him, but never felt quite what she felt with Ethan. With him, Y/N was the happiest she had ever been, and sometimes she wondered if it was a dream, but the touch of his hand and his sweet kisses reminded her it wasn’t. It was real life, and she was extremely lucky to have found someone like him.

She loved him, and of course she wanted his family to lover her too, so Y/N was quite disappointed when she sensed Ethan’s best friend, Kara, didn’t entirely like her. Scratch that, she could feel her hatred for her with just one look. So Y/N made it her mission to change that.

“Hey, Kara! How are you?” Y/N greeted her.

“I’m good” she said drily. “What do you want?”

“I heard they’re playing The breakfast club at that old cinema down the street. I was wondering if you’d like to go with me? You know, it’d be nice to get to know the other” Y/N said with a sweet smile.

The girl shifted uncomfortably “I don’t think so… I mean, I’m busy with college assignments and all that. But, you can ask the rest of the group. I’m sure they would love to go with you”

Y/N furrowed her eyes in disappointment “I understand. Well, good luck with your stuff. And if you happen to have some free time or want a break, I’d love to hang out with you”

“I’ll keep that in mind” the fake smile on her face made Y/N know Kara’d rather drown herself in finals and assignments than spend time with her.

Y/N walked back to Ethan’s house completely defeated. She didn’t know why Kara was acting that way towards her. They met hours ago, Y/N and her had barely interacted, so she didn’t understand where her attitude was coming from.

“Hey, love” Ethan welcomed her with a kiss and a tight hug.

“Hi, Eth” she laid on top of him on the couch, burring her head on the crook of his neck. “Oh, they’re playing The Breakfast Club tonight!”

Ethan smiled, knowing how much she adored that movie “You want to go?”

Y/N nodded “I was thinking we could go with your friends, to get to know them better. If that’s okay”

The boy caressed her cheeks as he looked at her with eyes filled with love and adoration “You’re the best girlfriend in the world, did you know that?”

“You’re exaggerating a bit” Y/N laughed “It’s literally the bare minimum”

“Well, I don’t care. I love you for it”

Ethan kissed her. His hands went to her hair, gripping it with a bit of force, and she couldn’t help but moan. He rolled them over, so that he was now on top of her. Ethan then started kissing her neck as his hand wandered under her t-shirt.

“We are not having sex in your parents’ couch” Y/N giggled, pushing him off.

“It’s fine, let’s go to our room” his lips attached to her neck.

Y/N rolled her eyes in amusement “Let me re-phrase that. We are not having sex in your parents’ house”

“There’s a motel down the-“

Y/N cut him off “I’m sure you can survive four more days without sex, you hormonal idiot” she hit him with the pillow, making him detached his lips from her skin.

“I really doubt that. I really miss being insid-“

Y/N put her hand on his mouth “No dirty talking either”

“Why do you have to be so respectful?” Ethan rolled his eyes in frustration.

“I’m sorry, babe. Kissing and cuddling will have to suffice”

“Fine” he crossed his arms in front of his chest and huffed. Y/N couldn’t stop her laughter “Don’t laugh at me, I’m mad.”

“I’m sorry, but you look so adorable. I love you very much”

He opened his arms so that she could cuddle his side “I love you very much too”

AFTER THE MOVIE, TARA INVITED Y/N FOR A SLEEPOVER AT HER HOUSE, WHICH SHE GLADLY ACCEPTED. Turns out, Ethan’s friends welcomed her to the group with open and warm arms—except for Kara, of course.

“Ew, Econ” Y/N said, shivering in disgust, when she saw the book lying on Tara’s desk. The four girls—Tara, Mindy, Quinn and Anika—laughed at her reaction. “It haunts me, I swear. I have to do the final exam next week”.

“We’re so lucky to be on summer vacations now” Mindy smiled contently.

Y/N furrowed her eyes “You are?”

“Yup, our college gives us one more week. So we started vacations this week” Tara explained.

“But-“ Y/N shook her head. “Never mind”

“No, tells us” Quinn encouraged.

“It’s just that today I invited Kara to the movies, and she said she had lots of college assignments to do, so she couldn’t come” Y/N said.

The girls exchanged glances “Maybe she just wasn’t in the mood and didn’t want you to feel rejected” Anika suggested.

“Yeah, that makes sense… yes, maybe you’re right” Y/N said, feeling a little bit better. Maybe she was overthinking.

“I mean, she did tell us we should invite you to a sleep over so you’d feel more comfortable” Tara said.

“Really? That’s nice of her. Yeah, I’m totally overreacting” Y/N shook her head, the pressure on her chest loosened.

“You’re really cool, Y/N/N. I don’t know how Ethan pulled you” Mindy said, making his girlfriend elbow her in the ribs. “Ouch! She knows I’m joking”.

Y/N laughed “You guys are really cool too”.

hey babe!

everything okay?

She texted Ethan, who replied a few short minutes later.

hi

yup, everything’s good

um, when you get here in the morning we should talk

That text made Y/N confused. He seemed dry, but she didn’t want to think about it so she just answered him shortly.

yeah, okay

we’re going to sleep now, so see you tomorrow<3

good night

Y/N fell asleep with a big knot in her stomach. She could feel something was not right at all, and it scared the hell out of her.

Y/N AND QUINN WALKED BACK TO HER HOUSE THE NEXT MORNING, and the red-head could sense something was going on inside her head. She looked completely sad and her face was the physical representation of anguish.

“You’re like an open book, you know? Come on, tell me what’s wrong” Quinn said. Y/N sighed and showed her the texts from last night. “He seems normal, he always texts like that”.

“Not to me”

“What could you possibly have done wrong? He was fine when we left the cinema, and then you didn’t talk to him until that text”

“I don’t know, that’s why I’m worried”

“Well, whatever it is, I’m sure you’ll both be okay. I know my brother very well, and I can tell he loves you very much. Like literally, you don’t know how much he talks about you, Y/N/N” she bumped her shoulder with hers.

“I hope it’s nothing, because he’s everything to me” she smiled sadly. At Quinn’s curious glance, she explained, “After my parents kicked me out of the house, because I didn’t follow the career they wanted, I was left in a dark place. And then I met your brother, and he helped me heal. I don’t know where I would be if it wasn’t for him, so the thought of losing him completely terrifies me”.

Quinn hugged her in comfort, her heart breaking for the girl. “You’re not losing him, Y/N. Couples fight, but they talk and they solve it, especially when love is present. And you and my brother have an incredibly amount of love for each other.”

“Thank you, Quinn” Y/N smiled gratefully.

“Anytime, you’re part of the family now, which I’m glad because you’re a sweetheart”

When they both arrived to the house, Quinn went to her bedroom, after telling Y/N to keep her updated on what was going on, and Y/N went to Ethan’s room. He was sitting with his back against the blue bedpost and was watching Tik Toks.

When he heard the door of the room being opened, he looked up and frowned “You didn’t sleep well” he stated, looking at the bags under her eyes.

“Um, no. I couldn’t sleep, I was worried about your texts, to be honest. You seemed off, is everything okay?”

“Kara came here last night” Ethan said.

Y/N frowned “Okay?”

“She said she came here to confront you”

“Confront me?” she asked confused.

“Because of the invitation” Ethan explained.

“Oh! It’s not a big deal” Y/N brushed it off.

Ethan scoffed and looked at her in anger, taking her aback “Not a big deal? What the hell, Y/N?”

“Why are you angry?” Y/N asked surprised.

He stood up from the bed “Oh, I don’t know! Maybe because my best friend was crying because my girlfriend leaves her aside. Because she wanted to get to know you and you just hung out with the rest of the group, but not with her”

“How is that my fault?!” Y/N asked in disbelief “I didn’t leave her out of the plan, she was the first person I asked to come!”

“Then why wasn’t she there?” Ethan asked in an accusatory tone.

“Because she told me she had college stuff to do and wouldn’t be able to make it” she explained.

Ethan laughed drily “Come up with a better excuse, Y/N, they are on summer break. Look, I understand if you are jealous, but you honestly have no reason to be. I love you and only you, you didn’t have to act like a bitch.”

The last word felt like stab to the chest “I didn’t do anything! I now know that she’s on holidays. The girls told me, they said Kara might have said that because she wasn’t in the mood for movies and didn’t want to make me feel bad for declining the invitation. But now she’s acting like I have been scheming against her, so I don’t know what to think anymore” she scoffed. She couldn’t believe Kara would be capable of going that far.

Ethan sat on the edge of the bed and sighed “I don’t know, Y/N”

“You don’t believe me” it wasn’t a question, it was an statement. And it pierced her heart that Ethan couldn’t even look at her “You really think I’m a crazy jealous girlfriend that only wants you to herself” the sadness was mixed with disbelief.

“I just… I need time to think” Ethan said softly, which made her a bit angry. He really believed she was capable of doing something like that.

Y/N shook her head, trying to hold back the tears “Whatever, Ethan. I just want you to remind you that I came here because I wanted to meet your family”

“Y/N-“

“I made sure all of your friends were going to be here, I made a fucking list of things we could do to get to know the other, I wrote down recipes I could do with your mom and sister-“

“Okay, I get it” Ethan said, trying to grab her hand, but she pushed it away.

“Do you?” her voice was thin, and she hated it. She hated crying so much “Because you didn’t hesitate for a second to believe I would be capable of purposely doing something to hurt the people you love”

“She’s my best friend” he tried to explain.

“Yes, I get that. But I’m your girlfriend, and I don’t expect you to call her bluff instantly, but you had no trouble at all believing I would do something as shitty as that” she pressed her lips in a thin line and brushed the tears off with her hands “And that fucking hurts. Especially because you know how much you mean to me”

“I’m sorry, Y/N/N. I’m just really confused” Ethan sighed, the sight of her crying made him feel like he had just kicked a puppy.

“I’ll give you space” Y/N said, grabbing her suitcase.

“What are you doing?” Ethan asked, panic present in his voice.

“You need time to think, and I do too” Y/N said, starting to pack her things.

“Are you breaking up with me?” the pressure on his chest was like nothing he had ever felt before. As if someone was stepping on it, not allowing him to breathe properly.

“No. We can’t talk to each other when we’re like this, we need time to process everything before we discuss it. We will end up saying things we might regret” Y/N said, facing away from him.

The pressure decreased but Ethan could still feel it. “Where are you going?”

“Back home, you should stay here. I’ll see you in a couple of days” Y/N said, standing in the doorway.

Ethan watched her walk away, fingers itching to hold her back. That was supposed to be a happy trip, she had been so excited to meet everyone. “Fuck” he grabbed a pillow and buried his face there, allowing the tears to fall.

ETHAN’S HEAD FELT LIKE EXPLODING AFTER CRYING SO MUCH, SO HE DECIDED TO GO FOR A WALK. He tried to take a nap, but without Y/N by his side, it was impossible. He felt complete emptiness now that she wasn’t around, and even if it had just been a couple of hours since they last saw each other, he missed her insanely. They had never fought like that, and it felt like hell.

“Ethan! Hey, we were just going to your house” Chad said, the rest of the group standing next to him.

“The cinema is playing Mamma Mia, Y/N’s favorite, and we thought we should definitely go” Anika said.

Ethan felt a pang on his heart at the mention of her name. “Um, Y/N left.”

“Oh, where?” Tara asked confused.

“We had a fight. It was pretty bad, and she went back home” even mentioning the fight made him want to crawl into a ball and cry like a little kid. He could hear his own broken voice.

“What happened?” Chad asked, rubbing his friend’s shoulder in a comforting way.

“Kara came over last night to tell me Y/N left her out of the plan because she was jealous of our friendship” Ethan said.

“That doesn’t sound like Y/N” Mindy said confused. “In fact, I think Kara was the first person she asked”.

“That’s what she told me, but Kara says the exact opposite. I don’t know what to believe, I mean, I trust them both and one of them is definitely lying” he exposed his frustration.

“Wait, Kara was the one who told us to invite Y/N for a sleepover” Anika said, frowning. “Why would she want to make Y/N feel part of the group if she was supposedly leaving her stranded?”

“Yeah, you’re right. That’s weird” Tara nodded.

Mindy gasped, scaring the group “What if she told us to invite her so she could talk to Ethan alone?”

“You make her seem like a movie villain, Mindy” Chad rolled his eyes. “But then again, this feels like a movie conflict”.

“Besides, she has a motive” Mindy said, ignoring her twin’s comment. Ethan looked at her confused, and the girl rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on. Are you that oblivious? Kara’s been in love with you for ages.”

“What?” Ethan asked shocked.

“Actually, now that I think about it, Kara had been acting strange since Ethan told us he would be coming with his girlfriend” Chad spoke.

“I’m a fucking idiot” Ethan groaned.

“Agreed” Mindy said, and Anika elbowed her on the side.

“She’s hates me now. She’s going to break up with me” Ethan said in panic.

“She won’t” Anika reassured him. “Wish you’ve heard how she talked about you last night, Eth. She has you on a fucking pedestal, don’t worry about it. You’ll be alright.”

“I hope so, guys. Because I love her way too much, and I don’t know what I’d do if I lost her”

THE SECOND THEY FIGURED IT OUT, ETHAN ALMOST GRABBED HIS KEYS TO CHASE AFTER HIS GIRLFRIEND. But his friends convinced him to let her be for a couple of days, which felt like torture because Ethan couldn’t stand being far away from her. He was so used to being with her that now he didn’t know how to be without her.

Now that the days had passed, he drove back to the city. His gaze constantly fell on the seat next to him, as if expecting Y/N to materialise there, he longed for her terrible voice screaming Taylor Swift songs like crazy.

Ethan stared at the door of their shared apartment anxiously. His stomach was revolted and his hands were so shaky that the knock on the door was barely audible. Yet, Y/N opened the door instantly, almost as if she had been expecting him—which she had.

When Ethan left his town, Quinn sent her a text telling her, so she could be prepared. And when she heard the sound of his knuckles against the wood, she ran towards it with desperation.

The couple almost cried at the sight of the other and in that moment, they both somehow knew they’d be okay. They still needed to talk, though.

“Hi” at the sound of her voice, he couldn’t help but engulfing her in a hug. They both melted at the touch of the other, and relief washed over their bodies. “I’m sorry, Ethan. Fuck, I missed you. I’m sorry.”

“No, no” he said, closing the door behind him while still hugging his girlfriend by the waist. “I’m the one who should be apologising. Shit, I’m such an asshole. Of course you’d never do something to hurt me, I’m sorry, Y/N. That thought should’ve never crossed my mind, and you had every right to be mad at me.”

“Yes, but I should’ve been more understanding. I mean, you had known her for longer than you’ve known me. Of course you wouldn’t distrust her”

“Still, I said some shitty things I really don’t think. You’re not a crazy jealous girlfriend or a bitch. You’re the best girlfriend I could ever ask for, and I’m so lucky to have you”

“I’m lucky to have you too. I missed you” she pressed her forehead against his, bumping their noses. Y/N traced the outline of his cheekbones delicately, loving the feeling of his soft skin and the way it seemed to relax him.

They went to sit on the couch, and Ethan pulled her on his lap, hugging her waist as she rested her head on his chest.

“I missed you too. I should’ve chased after you. I was about to do it, but the group held me back, saying you needed some time”

Y/N smiled “That was probably wise. I was a bit mad”

“They loved you, by the way. Especially Quinn” he said playing with her hair.

The girl laughed “I loved them too. Especially Quinn too, like I might have a tiny crush on her”

“Ouch, one visit and you’re already leaving me for my sister?” Ethan poked her in the ribs, making her squirm.

“Sorry. She’s just that great” Y/N said.

Ethan rolled his eyes and then smiled “I’m really glad you like her. Um, she told me that if I don’t fix things with you, I shouldn’t bother to go back”

Y/N giggled “See? She’s fricking awesome”

“Stop complimenting my sister, compliment me” he gave her a fake pout.

Y/N shook her head, grinning “You’ll always be my number one, Eth”

He pecked her lips “And you’ll always be mine.”

[ashkabbom]

Day off - Mouthwashing

✸ – 💥REQUESTS💥

→ ✸ – Mouthwashing - MasterList

A/n: I genuinely didn't like how this one turned out that much, but I swear I tried😭 (And this request came from Wattpad). Correct me if I wrote something wrong. English is not my first language and I ended up using the translator's help 🫶🏽👍🏽

•Daisuke x Male!Reader

Summary/Synopsis: Same day, different days off

Notes: Sometimes it's better to actually say what you feel and what you want to get out to the person you want to talk to. You already have the no, but you don't know what would have happened if you had said and/or explained what you think and feel.

You and your friend were walking through the mall, you had gone to the cinema to see a movie he really wanted to see and then went to eat, which resulted in you walking for some time.

Honestly, you thought you would spend the day at home today, it was finally your day off for the week, but you're not complaining about any of that, you just didn't expect to have a Japanese guy at your door at 5pm on a Sunday.

“Let’s stop right here, otherwise we’ll spend half an hour just deciding where to eat.” He says as the two of you approach one of the tables in the food court. "Let me order and pay for the food."

You sit right there and turn to Daisuke. "You can order the same thing you order for me too, but I want the large portion of fries and a... Vanilla milkshake with dulce de leche." You explain what you want and Daisuke nods, soon moving away from the table where you were.

Quite a gentleman you would say.

Daisuke was that friend you could call to do anything and if he was free he would accept right away, It's no wonder that last week you and he were at the hospital because you asked him to go with you, but it was only you who was going to have a blood exam.

But you would say he was more frequent at your house than you were at his, probably because you lived alone now and he was still in the process of getting a job as far as you knew.

He was a little insecure and nervous when it came to the future and getting a job, but you knew he would get it, Daisuke is amazing even at what he's not good at.

Yes, your friend was the best of the best for you, he always will be.

"Earth calling, hello hello?" You wake up from your trance and realize that your friend and the food have arrived. "Are you okay? I thought about leaving you there to think and stealing some of your fries, but then you started staring too much at the kid at the other table."

"I was staring at someone and you didn't tell me right away?!" You feel embarrassed that you possibly stared into the soul of a random child. "And you were still going to steal my fries"

"No no no. I said I thought that, I didn't say I was actually going to do that, it was just a thought." He defends himself as he eats the burger he had ordered.

"Oh, sure, sure." You don't waste much time grumbling and start eating too.

Moments like these are the ones you always keep in your memory. You are not a person who takes pictures of the moments you go out with your friends, you prefer to enjoy yourself without stopping to take pictures, although sometimes you wish you had a memory of days like those.

Honestly, you didn't remember how you met Daisuke, you just know that you've known him for about 4 years. It doesn't matter, he saw you and decided that you would be his friend and it ended up working out.

(At least that's how he explained how you became friends)

Your vacation would be in about 3 weeks, you were thinking about taking a trip with your family and your friend's family. It wasn't a bad idea, his mother and his mother got along well after all.

"Remember that girl from our school? The one who sat behind you in class?" He asks after taking a sip of his milkshake.

"A red-haired girl?" You ask and Daisuke nods. "Yes, I remember, it's hard to forget that girl." You roll your eyes with a smile.

"So.." He pauses to chew and swallow the burger. "She got married last week."

You choke a little on your milkshake. "SHE got married?? Last week??"

You and he spend another 2 hours at the mall, talking and taking the opportunity to buy some things for yourselves. It was a quieter day than you expected, but those trips to the mall always left you sleepy afterwards.

The Uber parks right in front of your house and you both get out of the car after paying. You just want to relax now and have some peace for the night.

After passing through and locking the door, you throw yourself onto the couch along with the shopping bag you were holding.

"You get tired really quickly, you know?" Daisuke says with a disapproving look. "I think I'll go home, it's a little late."

"Aaahh, I already locked the door now, just tell your mom that you're going to sleep here tonight" You say simply as you settle into the couch, stretching a little.

"Sleeping here tonight... You make dinner then, I'll call her now" He says as he goes to a corner of the house where he can't hear the future noise of the pots.

Honestly, you didn't know how he was still hungry, but you didn't complain. Maybe Stroganoff with rice and straw potatoes would be good for dinner today.

Now you two were having dinner on the couch, watching a random movie while chatting a little about anything. You decided to tell him what you were thinking about for your work vacation.

"My vacation is in 3 weeks and I was thinking about going to the beach together, you know? My family and yours. It's been a while since we've all been out together."

And then there was silence, except for the noise of the movie playing on the TV. You didn't know why it was so silent, but you didn't like it.

"... I got accepted into a job." He says with a little trepidation, but direct.

"Oh.. That's actually good!" You feel relieved and you laugh, you weren't expecting that. "I'm happy for you! We can go to the beach when you have time off or vacation then!"

"That's the problem.. I'm going to be gone for a whole year and maybe a little longer sometimes." And then his smile fades and his expression of relief disappears as well. "It's a company that transports cargo in... Space, Pony Express if I'm not mistaken"

It was a small thing, but that small thing is huge. You think you've heard about this company at some point in your life, but you weren't sure.

These things were quite common nowadays, so it wouldn't be hard for you not to have heard of some of these companies... or corporations?? I don't know, you don't care so much about the right way to call it.

"Oh.. That... That's new.." You say trying to process and organize the information. "That's great! I'm happy for you!" You say a little more excitedly, placing your now empty plate of food beside you.

"Yeah hehe.. Thanks" He says a little embarrassed and also puts the plate aside.

"Among the stars up there, is it?" You say thoughtfully. "When you get back, you'll tell me what it's like up there."

"Of course I will, but I don't know what could be so cool about a dark place with lots of white dots" Daisuke says genuinely confused.

"Oh, I think it's cool, I don't know what could be really cool either, but I like the idea!" You say feeling slightly attacked.

"If you say so" He laughs and rolls his eyes.

That night you asked (forced) your friend to wash the dishes while you pulled the mattress from your bedroom to the living room. Daisuke moves around a lot sometimes when he's sleeping, so letting him sleep on the couch wouldn't be the best idea, so you're the one who's going to sleep on the couch and he's going to sleep on the mattress on the floor.

"I wish I could sleep all day tomorrow.." You complain after throwing yourself on the couch, your pillow and blanket already on it.

"You're really lazy sometimes, you know that? But this time I'll take it off because you work." He throws a pillow in your face and laughs.

"You'll start to understand me when you start working." You reciprocate by throwing the pillow at him now. "Although it might even be peaceful in space" On reflection you can't find a right answer, but you were more inclined to believe that it would be peaceful and quiet.

"I don't even want to think about it too much, I start in two days" He mumbles and yawns, turning to the other side to soon fall asleep.

"And then I'm the lazy one who gets tired quickly. Soon you'll see what it's like to be really tired." You say as you look at your friend lying on the mattress, yawning soon after.

"There's no way I could be as lazy as you." He says in a loud whisper.

"Yes yes.. Just don't forget about me while you work there" Your tone changes from playful to more sincere. Being away from your best friend for so long is weird. You don't like it.

"You know that this is humanly impossible. I should be the one telling you this! Now lay your head down and go to sleep." He complains before he actually starts to fall asleep. You just laugh and agree, falling asleep too.

In the morning he went home after having coffee at his house. Daisuke explained to you that the next day he would be heading to work and that he would miss you, he hugged you, he cried a little.

Your friend might be a crybaby at times, but you wouldn't expect your eyes to water afterwards.

You remember it as if it were today, the day you said goodbye, you just didn't know it would be forever. You regret not having enjoyed that day more.

It had been 6 years since Tulpar, the ship Daisuke was on, had embarked into space, and today it had been 2 years since the ship had been found.

Only the captain was alive, the rest of the crew dead. It was reported how the crew had died, but nothing shown, obviously.

Daisuke's face had an axe cut mark in the middle of his face, his body had some serious injuries. That's what was said about it.

You regret not telling him how you felt.

Being away from Daisuke for so long was weird. You didn't like it.

[howtofightwrite]

I'm writing a scene where a cultivater (chinese martial artists who fights ghosts) falls in a forest and I'm trying to figure out how someone who fights on rough terrain would train to fall. I tried looking at martial art/parkour/stunt man tutorials, but I feel like a lot of the basic techniques (rolling, and slapping the ground to distribute weight) wouldn't work well on uneven ground. I also tried looking at hiking advice but they just say to fall on your pack. Any insight?

Chinese cultivators don’t fall, they choose to reacquaint themselves with the ground.

That sounds like a joke, but the best way to understand Chinese cultivators and Chinese fantasy media is to realize that martial arts are the gateway drug to magic. And that will get you into a lot of trouble if you follow that all the way into Martial Arts Give You Superpowers, which is both the outgrowth of the western understanding of Chinese culture and a trope rife with orientalism. Cultivation seems simple on the surface when you’re watching Chinese media, but it’s more than martial arts, it’s more than religion, it’s more than mythology, (though it is all of those too) it’s a genuine transition into metaphysics that reorients how we understand and interact with the world around us. The concepts we see in cultivation come from real martial arts philosophy that you find in Tai Chi, Shaolin, and most other Chinese martial arts. They come from real religions including Daoism, Buddhism, a healthy dose of Confucianism, general mythology and mysticism from a wide range of subcultures, and, to an extent, Animism. If you aren’t doing your reading with the Eight Immortals, Journey to the West, The Legend of the White Snake, and others then you should dig in. I also really suggest watching the live action C-Dramas whether they’re true Wuxia or more Xianxia idol dramas (and in this case the idol dramas are better because the action is slower) so you can acquaint yourself with the stylized martial arts portrayals, a wide variety of choreography, character archetypes essential to motif based storytelling, and the most important aspect of all—wire work.

Understanding and conceptualizing stunt action done on wires is essential when you’re trying to visualize and create action scenes in any East Asian genre. Your first instinct might be to dismiss the stylized movement as unrealistic (it is) but remember that it’s also genre essential. Hong Kong action cinema has a very specific feel to it that’s very different from the way Western cinema structures and films their fight scenes. Even when you’re writing, you’ll want to find ways to imitate it through your visual imagery on the page.

Probably the best way to contextualize cultivators is that they’re wizards who do martial arts. They’ve learned to transcend the limitations in our understanding of reality through knowledge and study to perform superhuman feats. How superhuman? Well, it gets wild. They can be anywhere from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon/Who Rules the World fly through the trees levels to Shang Tsung’s “I’m going to slam my hell reality into your normal reality because commuting to work is too much of an inconvenience.”

Which is to say, they don’t always fight ghosts. Sometimes they fight other martial artists, sometimes they fight other cultivators, sometimes they fight demons, sometimes they fight gods, and sometimes they fight incredibly overpowered monkeys. They’re often monks living in seclusion on a mountaintop, but not always. Cultivation is more of a state of mind. Anyone can do it if they learn how to absorb spiritual energy from the world around them through meditation and breathing exercises. Gods cultivate. Humans cultivate. Animals cultivate. Remember, the demons and the ghosts cultivate too. Sometimes, your master gets reincarnated as a demon. Sometimes, you do. The amount of wacky spellcasting you can do is dependent on how much energy you’ve cultivated, which is dependent on how old you are and how good at cultivation you are. Using the power means you need to cultivate more energy, the greater the spell or difficult the battle then the more energy is lost.

This is important to the question of: how does a cultivator fall?

Metaphorically? Existentially? Physically?

When we’re talking physically, wire work becomes very important. Think of your cultivator as being on wires. If they have the knowledge and understanding to do it, they can slow their own fall through the air to land harmlessly on the ground or twist over like a cat and launch themselves back off the ground to fly at their opponent in a counter attack. If they have the knowledge and understanding, they can teleport. If they lack the knowledge and understanding or want to trick their opponent, they can hit the ground like a sack of potatoes. If they’re relying on basics, they can also smack the ground to counter and spread out the impact then use the momentum from that fall to roll back onto their feet. They’ll do it no matter what terrain they’re on because it’s a basic technique that’s trained into their foundation to the point it’s a reflexive action. Any force distributed away from, and reducing impact on, important body parts like your spine is better than nothing. It’s better to sacrifice your arm than be paralyzed. At its heart, that’s the point of the technique. If you’re able to walk away with a functioning spine, it’s done its job. Your shoulder hurts? That’s normal. Your arm is sprained or broken? Sucks, but that’s better than the alternative that is paralysis and death. For reference, learning to fall was the first lesson my Wushu instructor ever taught me. It is that basic.

A lot of the time when portraying cultivators in media, the goal is to show them as being beyond the limitations of standard martial artists. How vast the gap is between the cultivator and the average human is dependent on both the setting and the cultivator. So, the average martial artist who possesses superhuman talents but hasn’t dedicated themselves to a life of cultivation and cultivators who are new to the path are going to be on the rung below and more likely to be knocked on their ass. Cultivators in the mid-range are more likely to have crafted or trained in solutions to being knocked on their ass which put them in a less vulnerable position while recovering and empowered/enhanced their martial arts. Cultivators in the top tier are usually straight up masters at spellcasting, if they deign to fight at all. Gravity need not apply. Rember, the time it takes you to hit the ground and roll to your feet is time your opponent has to launch a counter attack or move to a better position. Also, it means you’ve taken your eyes off your opponent. This is bad enough against a normal human opponent. Against another mostly immortal or ancient magic user this risks a terrible outcome.

Cunning and strategy are both as important as skill. Wisdom, knowledge, and hard work outweigh talent and raw potential. You’ll have to decide how esoteric you want to be and what limits you want to set. I really urge you to do this because the danger of power creep is real and especially prominent here. A character’s growth in power is often linked to their growth in character or their arc, as they gain a greater understanding of themselves and the world around them their skill increases. The self-discovery/self-reflection/self-interrogation/intense suffering to reach enlightenment portion is just as important and intrinsic to the martial arts portion of Martial Arts Give You Superpowers. It’s easy to focus on the Superpowers or the Martial Arts parts of the equation and miss the genre necessity of character growth. This growth often happens through heaps of steadily increasing trauma. Or, failing to undergo that by being too powerful and thus unable to progress is the joke like it is in Qi Refining for 3000 Years. (Go to hell, Bai Qiuran, you hilariously overpowered monstrosity.)

The irony is that the trajectory in character growth is the same trajectory the average student experiences when practicing martial arts. The only difference is that the power arc is inflated. This includes overcoming ingrained truths that you believe about yourself, about your own abilities, what you believe yourself to be capable of (both good and bad,) about your biases toward yourself and other people, your biases about reality in general, your understanding of good and evil, the potential upending of right and wrong, and facing the greater complexity found in the world at large. The stripping away of these illusions, coming to terms with uncomfortable realizations in a more complicated world, and the gaining of new understanding and confidence are vital to that growth.

Skill isn’t just represented in the power creep, it’s also found in a character’s sophistication and complexity in their approach to combat and life in general. Their awareness both of themselves and of other people, their ability to read intentions, their predictive abilities, their complexity in initiating their own strategy and tactics while also recognizing and countering the plans of others. It’s their insight into human nature and their cunning. It’s not enough to be powerful. The world is full of powerful people and not so powerful people who have the capacity to be just as dangerous. This isn’t Goku and Freeza slamming into each other while the planet explodes in nine minutes. You also need to be smart. It’s also not about being a better person. It’s about being a self-aware person. A person who is self-actualized. Monkey’s growth is in his awareness of the world around him through his experiences and in approaching problems differently rather than becoming less of a little shit. If you grow up in the West, one of the issues you’re going to face is thinking of these hurdles as materialistic rather than emotional or intellectual.

A lot of Western media misinterprets the concepts of “giving up” as physical sacrifice. One of the popular examples is physically sacrificing the person we love. In order to have enlightenment, we must be separated from them. We can’t physically be with them anymore. Whereas under a Buddhist structure, what we are actually sacrificing is our own ignorance, our own preconceptions, and beliefs that keep the world comfortable. Under this structure, we’re sacrificing our preconceived notions of who our loved one is. The person that we invented when we first met and we must force ourselves to come to terms with who they really are. The outcome of this isn’t necessarily going to be bad, but it’s still painful. The person we think we love could be perfectly wonderful. However, they’re not who we imagined. If we choose to hold onto the illusion we created, to ignore the realization that the illusion is the person that we love, we’ll only end up causing ourselves and our loved one more pain. We must fall in love with them all over again. Coming to terms with that is painful. All pain comes from ignorance. In sacrificing, letting go of, or overcoming our ignorance, we grow.

These are the emotional, intellectual, and spiritual challenges necessary for a cultivator because they allow the cultivator to level up. Yes, level up. Whether this is coming from the influx of gaming culture into media at large or because the concept synergizes with the Buddhist goal of progressing through the Six Realms toward nirvana, leveling up is how a cultivator’s increasing power is often depicted. Of course, once we reach the next level we can’t go back except by falling or failing and are no longer the person we once were. This then gets mixed in with Daoist principles of finding divine understanding by living in harmony with the universe. The more understanding we gain of the world, the more energy we can absorb as a result, but our original goals may be lost or changed in the process. If a character begins their journey on the path of revenge, their newfound contextualization of the situation that caused them immense pain may force them to give that revenge up or find they don’t want revenge anymore.

Failure is also an option and often a common part of the story. These stories usually follow characters through multiple lives and rebirths over hundreds and even thousands of years, especially if they’re also gods. This is the existential fall. The fall to the Dark Side. All our heroes are going to go through it at least once. This is also why a lot of Chinese media ends in tragedy with hope for the next round.

-Michi

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