#i wake up and everything i can think of that would make me happy is a mirage

[bullet-prooflove]

The Wedding Gift: John Shen x Reader

Tagging: @kmc1989 @miraclesabound @cannonindeez @fadeinsol @nommingonfood

Companion piece to:

Ashes - You take revenge on the first man your parents sold you to.

The Choice - In the wake of his brother’s suicide John goes against his parents’ wishes and makes a choice about his residency.

You Should See Me In A Crown - A chance encounter sparks the beginning of something special for John.

Dick Pics - You and John discuss your dating life in the ambulance bay during a rare shift break.

Brunch - John refuses to give up when you miss brunch with him.

Silly Little Boys (NSFW) - John's not like the other men you've been with.

In The Summer - You discover John's secret.

Tiger, Tiger - John reveals the truth between his engagement and his history.

Jack - John's mother opens up old wounds by giving John a copy of your DCFS file.

Bare (NSFW) - John and you commit to each other in a special way.

The Shirt - Jack realises that you're wearing a boyfriend shirt.

Tradition - Mrs Shen makes a decision regarding the wedding.

John’s dad brings out the worst in him.

John knows this because whenever he sits across from the man he’s filled with an inexplicable sense of rage, one that burrows like a barb underneath his skin.

It started after Michael passed away and has continued throughout John’s three year residency into his attending career.

After four years he thought it would have ebbed but it’s still there, vengeful and prevalent. It’s made worse by the fact his father is trying to treat him like a teenager, to dictate his life yet again from a leather chair in Pittsburgh’s most expensive gentleman’s club. The scent of old money, cigars and entitlement permeates his nostrils, only adding fuel to the fire.

“I’m not giving up Cici.” He tells Bo Shen as the other man swills the ice cubes in his glass, making them clack together. “I do not give a shit what deal you made with Jia’s family…”

The left side of Bo’s mouth tips up into a sneer at the sound  of your name and John wants to flip the fucking table.

“We’re rescheduling the wedding for the Spring.” Bo tells his youngest son. “After that I expect you to work your hardest on producing an heir. You can keep you little American fling on the side. It’s of no consequence.”

“That’s not happening-”

“Jian-Wen.” Bo says sternly, using John’s Chinese name to reinforce his words. “You will do as I say!”

“No I fucking won’t.” John says, raising to his feet. “Don’t think that I don’t know what this is about, your media company, it’s failing isn’t it? The Mings, they’re offering you a cash injection under the guise of a wedding gift?”

The expression on his father’s face in that moment, it tells John everything he needs to know.

“It started with Michael didn’t it? He knew what was going to happen, how it would ‘dishonour’ the family so he sunk all of his money into it and it still wasn’t enough, in fact it killed him.” John places his hands on his hips as he stares down at this father, his eyes glinting like polished onyx. “And now you’re trying to sell your youngest son just so you won’t have to face the ugly truth, that the company is floundering, that it’s been floundering for years and it is dragging you down with it.”

“You don’t understand.” Bo says harshly. “You don’t understand what it will do to our reputation, how it will ruin your mother…”

“She doesn’t know?” John asks incredulously. “She doesn’t know how close to the edge you are teetering?”

“This marriage will put things back on track. Each child you have will add more abundance to the business.” Bo informs him and John feels like he’s losing his damn mind because in what world would a man put a price on his grandchildren.

 He can already see their lives playing out in horrific detail, promised to other wealthy families under the same premise, their own children paid for. He won’t contribute to that legacy, he won’t be a part of it.

“If you loved me you wouldn’t ask me to sacrifice my happiness for this.” He tells his father, giving him one last chance.

“If you cared about this family, you’d do your duty.” Bo counters and John knows that this is a losing battle. 

“When all this shit comes crashing down around your head, I’ll still be here as your son but I won’t be marrying Jia, and I won’t be leaving Cici. You’ll have to find some other way out of this mess.”

He walks away then, leaving his father in the rearview to face his reckoning.

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Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[miiyas]

… HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CHUUYA

where as chuuya nakahara has a mission on the day of his birthday

wc: 1.1k, angst little to no comfort, fem reader, not proof read

“what’dya mean you have a mission ?” your voice shakes slightly at the news, brows pinched with hints of disappointment as you tail chuuya around the house. he’s gathering files from his work desk and skimming through them, flicking his fingers through each thin piece of paper before looking for more folders, being supported by the shine of the midnight moonlight spotlighting the room. he’s unusually quiet and the tension in the air is thick, like he knew that this conversation would come up again, like he knew that you’d say the same things you always say when he leaves for another long assignment.

“it means,” he says slowly, his patience already wearing thin. “that boss needs me out.” he snaps his voice at the last few words, throwing a pale beige folder on the edge of the desk before slamming the file cabinet shut, punctuating his words.

you stand a distance away from him, just on the other side of the dark mahogany wood. fingers twist and turn the hem of your nightwear, wrinkling the fine silk as you chew on the inside of your bottom lip, staring intently at the small movements your husband makes. he places a hands down on the edge of the table, the other opening folders, scattering reports and papers. the silence is deafening and you can hear the soft hum of the midnight of the outside world creeping into the large work room.

“… you’re staring.” chuuya whispers, not bothering to lift his head, flipping a paper to read the back. you don’t respond, your silence is enough to drill the message through his head. the ginger grips the table, veins peaking out to show his own dissatisfaction before he lets out a long, string of a sigh. he flexes his fingers and drums it along the intricate design of the wood.

“i told him i didn’t want to go.” he presses slowly, hair covering his already darkened eyes.

“you could tell him to assign someone else.” you whisper, almost as if you were going to wake someone. your heart aches to watch him leave the house every time mori assigns him to a mission outside of your familiarities with yokohama. the thought of seeing your husband, the one you vowed to give your everything to, coming home exhausted and unable to keep his stance, makes the ring on your finger feel cold and more prominent.

“i can’t.”

“you can.” you scrunch your face, feeling your muscles go tense. “you can because you have superiority, chuuya. you can because this can be assigned to someone else with just your word.”

“mori has more superiority than i do,” his gaze shifts up sharply, brows sharp and edged with warning. you’re unfazed at this, but you can feel your legs tighten at his tone, bird of anger pulsing through your veins.

outside, head beams shine into the dark room, flickering rapidly for a second, overriding the soft glow of the moon. with another inhale to his lungs, chuuya stands straight and runs a hand through his hair, picking up the scattered papers and sliding them into its respective pockets. he moves with ease around the table, walking past you and towards the door. your turn your body with him and instead of following him, you stand still, hands tingling with the sense of tv static.

“i don’t want you to go,” you whisper, brows furrowed. there’s a kind of softness in your voice that makes chuuya pauses just by the door. “it’s your birthday.”

you can feel the same pang in your husbands heart, his left ring finger twitching slightly at the reminder. there’s a gut wrenching feeling that poisons chuuya’s stomach, his breath shallowing as he thinks his heart had just stopped beating for a moment. but just as his hand twitches and his body starts to turn slowly behind him, the car honks and it brings him back to the reality of things. and with the honk of the car, you knew you lost.

you swallow the lump down your throat, clenching your jaw tightly, feeling your breathing shake and sync with the gingers. with slow, heavy steps, you make your way past the door, past chuuya, and head to your shared bedroom, coming out just a few seconds later to bring his signature hat. the back of your hand dusts it off gently and your gaze can’t meet his. with cold fingers, you hand over the hat and chuuya hesitates for a moment, but takes it with a ‘thanks,’ his voice barely above a whisper. he swallows and nests it on his head, but the mass of the hat doesn’t sit well as it usually does.

before you can bid him goodbye, cold hands come up to cup your face, pulling you an inch closer to place a gentle kiss on your forehead, then one on your left temple, then the corner of your lips.

chuuya kisses like it’s the only moment of peace he has with you, slow and gentle, taking his time like every mission he takes is his last.

“i’ll be back, you know that.” his tone turns soft, voice matter-of-fact. but how can a husband calm the worrying heart of a wife that has seen the dirtiest side of him, one that knows of the consequences of his line of work.

you press your cheek on his hand, the feeling cool and raw on your skin without the thin barrier of his gloves. you hate to let him go, and he loathes to do the same.

“i’ll be back before the day ends. i promise. we can make the day up.” he knows open ended promises like that are no guarantee, he knows that you know. though, you shake your head, a weak, almost forced smile tugging your lips, never reaching your eyes.

“i just want you home safe.”

the honk of the car becomes a second longer and chuuya’s gaze drifts away from yours, his hands losing the gentle hold it had. he exhales quickly before placing a kiss on your lips. gentle, but rough enough to know that he stamped his mark.

“go back to bed. i’ll be here by the evening.” you watch as chuuya leaves with a whisper, slowly walking past you and leaving you to stand idle. your heart beats rapidly at the every little sound— the movement of his shoes, the jingle of the keys, and the click of the door shutting.

and despite it all, no matter how much he loves you, his priorities are clear as the diamond that decorates your ring.

[elysianstarfall]

under the weather (phantom busters)

summary: you're not feeling too good... what does your boyfriend do about it?

characters: shishikuno mogari, korekishi eugene, kanzaki kaoru, tamon kotaro

a/n: unfortunately self-indulgent bc i am going through it rn bro 💔 for these hcs in my mind you guys are at his house or something idk

s. mogari

immediately worries that it's his fault

"you swear you're not mad at me? say on god."

once you rule that out he's wondering whose fault it is

cause like

why the fuck does his beautiful gf look so sad

who could have possibly done this??

if it's because of a person, he's planning the most elaborate scheme to ruin their life

if it's not, he calms down and tries to see if he can help

gives you one of those super tight hugs and doesn't let go until you're literally gasping for air

even after he does let go he still keeps his hands somewhere on you

physical touch final boss i tell you

holds your face in his hands or just holds your hands or just has his arm around your shoulder he dgaf as long as he's touching you somewhere

anyways it looks like he's not listening to you when you talk

like, at all

i swear he is

you can ask him something like "what did i just say" and he'll repeat it word for word

somehow

he's not one to think of solutions though, he'll just hear you out

basically just holds you and listens to everything you say

he's never been so quiet in his life

k. eugene

the bf ever

lets you get it all out, lets you cry on his shoulder or into his chest or do whatever you need to do

and then brainstorms things to do to make it better

he's so nice about it

asks if it's something you think would work or if you want a different solution

really wants to help you, but if you tell him to stop he will

like he'll drop it right away

gets you your favorite snacks and whatnot

delays doing his homework and stuff to comfort you because

his girl is sad what could be more important than that

if you're spiraling or you're seriously getting depressed he just distracts you

he's so smooth with it too!!

like a casual topic switch to what you had for breakfast or your favorite food or your favorite color or why your favorite color is your favorite color or...

what were you sad about again?

as i said he lets you do whatever you need

he has tissues ready obviously but if you feel like sobbing into his shirt, go for it

he's not gonna stop you

he'll just stroke your hair or trace things on your back until you feel better

and you do

k. kaoru

stares at you

huh????

yeah

you're like two seconds away from sobbing your eyes out and he's just staring

he's actually so sorry

he's had to comfort his sister a couple times but that doesn't mean he's good at it

his brain starts working again though dw

not a physical touch guy but he'll reach for your hand

and if you want a hug his arms are open

the type to listen quietly and only respond when you ask him stuff

ok that sounds kinda bad but he just wants to let you get everything off your chest

and he's very much paying attention

but if you ask him for help he has zero solutions to your problem

again he's so sorry

really wishes he could help you more but his coping mechanism was literally reading manga while crying in his room

puts on an anime or a movie to distract you

but if he can tell it's not working he'll turn it off and just cuddle with you

yeah he's "not a physical touch guy" but if it makes you feel better he'd do anything

you end up just falling asleep and when you wake up he's staring again

but this time he's smiling a bit

t. kotaro

while he's trying to cheer you up, he just gets sad for you

like how is he supposed to be happy when the love of his life is going through something???

how dare he???

^ probably his thought process

so now you're both sad

great...

listens to you really closely

makes small noises so you know he's locked in

like "mhm" or "really?"

knows exactly what to say to make you feel better

are we kidding he literally helps ghosts pass on by talking to them

it's lowkey a free therapy session

promises you it'll all be ok

doesn't matter how dire the situation is, he hates seeing you worry about it so much

if you don't feel like sharing he just puts his headphones over your ears and puts on your shared playlist for you to listen to

or!!

if you ask him to really nicely he'll sing for you

he'll only do it super quietly though, he's too shy

won't initiate too much physical contact, might hold your hand or wipe your tears

just tries his best to be there for you

[phagodyke]

yeah I'm not gonna talk abt it am I...

[stereax]

woohoo spiraling out of control right now (what else is new really I've been fucked up and spiraling for weeks now) and trying to figure out reasons not to delete my tumblr and discord and myself along the way

but you know. talking about myself on my blog automatically means I'm attention seeking and fishing for pity right? should just shut up and stick to the news eh, it's all I'm good for :D

anyway if you need me I'll be in the corner reliving the past, coming to terms with reality, and trying to convince myself I'm not the problem despite every indication to the contrary ✌︎︎

[todayisafridaynight]

i see you are a fear and hunger fan. Injecting my brainwaves onto you

ouuugghhh these branwaves make me want pretzel sticks.....

[carebearbussy]

𝙨𝙖𝙡𝙩𝙮 & 𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩

ᥫ᭡ 𝙨𝙮𝙥𝙣𝙤𝙥𝙨𝙞𝙨: 𝙞𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝… 𝙨𝙪𝙠𝙪𝙣𝙖𝙨 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙜𝙣𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙨 𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙘𝙧𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨.

ᥫ᭡ 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: 𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙚𝙧𝙖! 𝙨𝙪𝙠𝙪𝙣𝙖 𝙭 𝙛𝙚𝙢𝙖𝙡𝙚! 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧

ᥫ᭡ 𝙘𝙬: 𝙋𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛 <3

ᥫ᭡ 𝙬𝙘: 1.3k

𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚? 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙢𝙮 𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

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Your cravings have been going wild.

Ever since you had fallen pregnant by an absolute gargantuan of a man, you are forced to carry twice the amount of nutrients and food stored in your body. The local doctors had recommended that your usual meals be doubled in size, in order to support the extra weight it carried by having a child under Sukuna. And even Sukuna had chimed in, adding that maybe his diet would work for you. But you quickly declined the offer, taking into consideration the life growing inside of you. You did not want your child to grow up to be a cannibalistic monster, much like his father.

But your food choices have been much more bizarre as of lately. Things ranging from huge one course meals that could feed a family of 7, pickled everything, anything covered in cheese, and any regular foods you ate had to be made a specific way, or served in larger portions. Which is why you had decided to wake Sukuna up in the middle of the night, one of the cravings you had pondered on being at the top of your to do list.

Every now and then, your cravings would get really bad. To the point where it was now everybody else's problem. But you truly couldn't help it.

"Kuna, 'Kuna wake up!" You whispered, as you lay spooned beside him. You shook his body from behind you as you spoke, making sure he could hear you. You felt him stretch awake with a low groan, letting you free of his grasp. "Are you awake? Its important..." you ask, awaiting a response out of him. And to your avail, he is awake, but not with the attitude you were initially hoping for. He seemed annoyed that his rest had been interrupted, but those concerns were to be put to rest, as you stepped out of bed, sliding your slippers on by the edge of the bed. He looks at your standing form with half lidded eyes, clearly making the first of many signals of his annoyance with you at the moment.

"What is so important that you wake me from my rest, woman? Im giving you six seconds to speak." He says, as he props himself upwards, sitting at the edge of the bed. With you standing near him, he seizes your hips with his lower set of hands, forcing you into his proximity. "I'm not waiting all day." He ushers you on to speak, but as you think about his possible answer, you start to rethink telling him what you truly want. You look away, clearly starting to get nervous with the attention. But as you do, he grabs your chin, forcing you to look down at him, as he searches for answers. "Go on."

"Well... i've been having cravings lately, and I wanted to know if maybe the kitchen could make me something..." You say, fiddling with your thumbs, as you feel your stomach start to growl lowly. He looks down at your stomach, as you quietly protest his decision to be made. He closes his eyes for a couple seconds, before responding.

"If this is what you really need, then I will indulge this once, brat." He says with a low sigh, as he lets go of his hold on your waist, getting up from his spot on the bed. You look up at him eagerly, silently squealing to yourself as you jump up and down slightly. You wrap your arms around your husbands neck, as you reach up on your tiptoes to pepper kisses all over his defined face. He looks down at your cheerful form, looking unaffected by the attention you give him, but deep down is smiling on the inside. He knows that as long as you stay his sweet, happy wife, then he can get a good nights rest after this.

He picks you up by the back of your thighs, as you are lifted off the ground what seems suddenly. He hoists you on his left side, one hand holding your ass up, the other acting as a back rest. Letting yourself be carried, he opens the door with his right hand, walking into the large hallway to your favorite place since becoming pregnant, the kitchen.

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It seemed as if you had started a national crisis.

With the way you had Uraume, as well as a team of the estates chefs working like dogs in the kitchen. All that could be heard from the upper left wing of the estate was the clinking and clanging of pots and pans, as well as chefs scurrying to prepare the food you had requested. Because it was well known that any request of yours, was to be taken as seriously as if it were from Sukuna.

Uraume seemed to be the only calm one, with them being used to your shenanigans. They were the head of the kitchen, as they lead all of the preparations for the 'big feast', as they like to call it. That big feast being for your pregnant self, of course.

As the kitchen was torn shred by shred trying to prepare you the perfect dish, you stood by the entrance and watched, one hand on your stomach. Standing besides you was Sukuna, with lower arms crossed, as his upper arms conducted the kitchen staff with whats right and wrong. Your eyes lit up with excitement, as you watched all of these people cater to your needs.

"Kuna, how about... chocolate filled dumplings?" You asked, looking up at your focused husband. He was busy keeping an eye on everything, making sure not to mess up your multiple requests you had made in the past twenty minutes. He looks at you with upper set of eyes, his lower ones hyper focused on the kitchen staff.

"That sounds disgusting. But if that is what you wish, so be it." He tells you, scoffing at all of the ridiculous things you had said so far. He then watches as Uraume heads your way, a silver platter in hand, holding what seemed to be at least thirty pieces of bacon, covered in chocolate and sea salt. To any sane person, this would look downright vile. But to you? Sukuna watched as your mouth practically dropped. You squealed in excitement, looking at the dish in hand. "Please enjoy, my lady." Uraume says, still holding out the dish to you as you happily devour it.

But you pause as you look over at Sukuna, still looking down at you. And thats when a lightbulb flicks in your head. You grab a piece of bacon from the tray, as you step in front of Sukuna. He looks down at you, wondering what you're up to, when you reach up on your tippy toes to try and pry open his mouth. "Pleaseeee try it!" You say, pouting your lips, still trying to open his mouth with your fingers. He looks down at you as he furrows his eyebrows, curling his lip upwards. "No, that is repulsive."

Your pout lowers into a full frown, your eyes glossy with the want for him to try what you are offering him. He rolls his eyes, as he picks up the piece of bacon you are holding with two fingers. He looks at it, as he scoffs, swallowing it in one go. "See! Its good right?" You ask him, a smile crossing your face. He looks at you with a 'are you serious?' look, before ruffling your hair, amused with how happy you were that he divulged you.

"It was horrible. Never again are you going to make me do these kinds of things for you, brat."

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[chiibabie]

ONLY YOU ♡

where they have a bad dream about losing you ft. rin, isagi, nagi, sae, reo, kaiser

rin

rin sees you and sae together.

everything around him is white, but in front of him, is none other than you and his brother. you're holding sae's arm, and you smile so sweetly at him that it makes rin sick to his stomach.

turning around, you seem to notice him and give him a strained look, eyes darting around. rin opens his mouth but closes it, unsure of what to say.

finally, you speak up.

"rin.." you began, "I can't do this anymore."

rin feels his heart drop to his stomach. what do you mean? what are you even saying?

"what are you-" his words are cut off before he can finish.

"I-I'm in love with sae. I want to be with him. rin, I'm sorry, but I just don't love you anymore." you reveal, voice distant as you avoid his gaze.

your words feel like a slap to his face and his world begins to crumble. he wants you to reach out to you, to grab your wrist and tell you that he'll do anything for you to stay. what can his brother do that he can't? he feels his legs beginning to crumble before he slumps down onto the floor on his knees. rin doesn't want to let you go, he loves you too much.

sae gives him a disinterested look over his shoulder. he walks to where rin is, eyes cold as if he was mocking him, before crouching down closer to him and whispering something in rin's ear.

rin wakes up with a start.

he's sitting up, sweating and trembling as he gasps for air, his heart pounding in his chest. the room is dark and silent, but the weight of the dream still lingered. the haunting thought that maybe he wasn't enough, that you would choose someone else over him, even his own brother. he closes his eyes as he presses his hand to his face, trying to even out his breathing and convince himself that it's just a dream.

"rin..?"

he freezes. right, he forgot you were sleeping next to him.

"rin.." you whisper, voice groggy from sleep. "what's wrong?"

"nothing." he grunts. it's stupid, but he doesn't want to admit he just had a nightmare about losing you to sae. it's not real he repeats to himself in his head.

obviously you are not convinced. after all, rin is sweating and he seems so stressed, plus his shoulders are tense so it can't just be nothing. sitting up, you lean in to be closer to him.

"rinnie, did you have a bad dream? you can talk about it if you want, I'll listen," you offered. your voice is soft and comforting, and rin resists the urge to just rest his head on your chest. it makes him think that maybe you are too good for him. that he doesn't deserve you. that you deserve to be with someone who's better than him. maybe he should let you go. he loves you, so maybe he should let you go to be with someone who will really make you happy. after all, what exactly has he done to deserve someone like you?

but deep inside, he doesn't ever want to let you go. rin doesn't want to share your smile or laughter with anyone else. he wants you to smile only at him with that fondness in your eyes. the thought of you with someone else is enough to make him go crazy. which is why, he finally admits the truth.

"I dreamt that you left me for sae." he states, rather bluntly.

you blink.

before you can even speak, rin says something that makes your heart hurt.

"do you ever wish you were with someone else?" he asks. he's so vulnerable right now and so different from his normal cold nature. the dream must've really had an effect on him. since he's staring at the wall in front of him instead of looking at you.

"rin," you say, cupping his cheek as you turn him to face you. even though the room is dark, you can still see how his eyes lack any emotion except for insecurity and doubt. "I wouldn't ever leave you for sae, or anyone else. it's just a dream. I promise, I want to stay with you forever."

your voice is so honest and your words make rin feel as if a huge rock has been lifted from his shoulder. right, it's just a dream after all. besides, he would never let his stupid brother steal you away. he won't let anyone steal you away.

"okay." he nods.

gently, he lays back down and pulls you down with him, hugging you close to his chest as he rests his chin on your head. he doesn't say anything, but just holding you close like this is enough to make most of his worries go away. if he has to, he'll be better for you.

rin is tired and his eyes are on the verge of closing when he hears you whisper out a quiet, "I only love you, rinnie."

isagi

isagi is twisting and turning around in his sleep, eyebrows scrunched as a bead of sweat rolls down his forehead. what exactly is he dreaming about?

in his dream, isagi is walking through the bustling city with you. the streets are busy and filled with people, but he's only focused on you. his only thought is you. in fact, you occupy most of his brain space. he's holding your hand, but you seem a bit distant. almost as if you're bored being there with isagi. even though you've been roaming around the city together for a while, he feels as if the connection between you guys was slipping through his fingers.

he sees you glance at your phone, as if there's something more important that's pulling you away. isagi tries to shake the feeling off, but it won't go away and he feels that nervous feeling form in his stomach.

the dream warps, and what he sees is horrifying and it makes his heart drop.

in front of him, is you. and rin. rin is on top of you on the couch as you're pressing kisses onto his face.

isagi can't move. the only thing that he can whisper is a quiet "what's...what's going on..?"

his voice seems to grab you and rin's attention as both your heads snap towards isagi's direction. instead of looking panicked at the fact that you just got caught, you gently push rin off you and sit on the couch. in the softest tone, you tell isagi something that will haunt him for the rest of his life.

"I've been thinking a lot, and...and I just... don't love you anymore." your voice is flat and distant, as if you're talking to a stranger.

isagi takes a step back, unable to process this. you're joking right? you're joking, you're joking, you're joking, you're joking...

he gulps, unable to breathe as he can only whisper out a quiet no.., his voice barely audible. your words sting and suffocate him. he wants to say something. he'll do anything to fix your relationship. just tell him, and he'll grovel at your feet on his knees if it means you'll stay.

rin is sitting casually on the couch. he hasn't said anything, but his eyes meet isagi's gaze. isagi clenches his fists when he makes eye contact with rin. his piercing gaze seems to be mocking isagi, almost as if rin is saying i win.

isagi gasps for air, heart pounding as he sits up in his bed. it took him a moment to realize it was just a nightmare, but his hands are trembling and he can't really shake off the image of you smiling and kissing rin. seriously, out of everything he can dream about, he has to dream about you and rin? why can't he dream about scoring ten goals in soccer?

isagi looks down at the bed to the space next to him. you're still sleeping soundly and he sighs in relief that he didn't wake you up. a small frown grows on his face. he's aware that it's just a stupid dream since you're obviously still with him, sleeping next to him. there's a bit of hair covering your face, and isagi reaches his hand out to brush it away. it's dark, but the light from the digital clock makes your face a bit visible. he stares at you, admiring your sleeping face. you're so pretty, he thinks.

he sighs, before finally laying back down on the bed next to you. he pulls you in close to his chest as he presses a kiss on your forehead.

you grumble and shift a little in his hold, before finally settling down and whispering out a tiny "I love you, yoichi.."

yeah, you only love him. and he only loves you. even if the world ends, you will always be the only one for isagi, and he hopes that you feel the same. that you'll love him always, and that you will always be by his side.

he doesn't want to think about losing you.

nagi

nagi was at first dreaming about playing video games, but he's losing in all of them. and then the dream shifts to him being outside of his classroom

he's confused. the last thing he wants is to be at school right now. but then he hears voices and talking from the other side of the door.

"he's so weird, you know? a total loser." he hears someone say.

he hears anyone person agree with the previous statement, stating their own personal opinion of "he doesn't even try. I mean come on, y/n, you can do so much better than a slouch. better than that sloppy looking guy. come on, someone like nagi is never going to change."

oh, so they're talking about him. and you're there.. talking about him as well?

the dream shifts again and he's across from you sitting at a table. there's a heavy silence, and finally, as if you'd been searching for the right words, you say "I don't think this is working out. I.. I don't think we're right for each other. it's not personal, but I just.. don't want to be with you anymore."

someone like nagi is never going to change, the words echoed in his mind.

his heart is sinking, and he reaches his hand out to you, desperate to make you believe that he can change. he'll try, he really will. he wants to speak, but nothing comes out.

your eyes are cold, nothing like the ones that used to look at him full of love and adoration, as if nagi was the one who hung the stars in the sky.

just like that, nagi is jolted awake. he's breathing heavily, staring the ceiling.

he sits up, rubbing his face and trying to shake off the nightmare. but it clings to him, like a whisper in the back of his mind. someone like nagi is never going to change.

oh, you're not in bed with him. no wonder it feels so cold. for a split second, he thinks the dream was real. that maybe you really did leave him. but from his room, he can see a small light coming from outside.

surprisingly, he gets out of bed and walks to the kitchen. there, he sees you, in your nightgown standing at the counter. you don't seem to realize he's behind you, so he sneaks up and hugs you from behind.

"ah!" you let out a small squeak, surprised that nagi was awake at this hour.

"sei, why are you awake?" ironic that you're asking that question, since you're also awake...

"mm.." he grumbles, "can't sleep."

there's a silence. neither of you say anything else.

"s' cold without you.." he mumbles out, rubbing his cheek against yours.

"alright, alright, let's go back to bed." you say. nagi doesn't protest and instead drags you back to the bedroom where he lightly tackles you onto the bed and buries his head in your chest. you run your fingers through his hair and he lets out a sigh of contentment.

"am i unattractive?" he suddenly asks, making you halt your movement of playing with his hair. his face is squished into your chest so the words did come out a little mumbled, but you're genuinely confused. nagi wasn't one to care about appearances and he never asked you questions about how he looked.

"seishiro, why are you asking that?"

"am I?" he seems a bit pressed for your answer.

maybe he dreamt about his appearance? either way, you decide that you won't ask about it right now, since you doubt he'll tell you, claiming it to be too much of a hassle.

"well, sei, I think you're very handsome," you coo at him, as if he's a baby. "and you're cute. you look handsome when you're playing soccer, and even when you're gaming, or even when you've just woken up and your hair's a mess."

nagi just lets out a hum, mumbling a quiet "kay, angel.."

sae

sae drifted into a deep, restless sleep.

he dreams about you. the both of you are at the beach and the sun is setting, which casts a golden glow on your face. you're beautiful, he thinks. your hair is swaying gently due to the wind. he feels content here, being with you. the both of you are walking along the shore and there's a comfortable silence between you two.

but you look distant. and sad. sae doesn't ask about it at first and he attempts to brush it off. but you stop walking and look up at him with eyes that hold a million emotions that he can't comprehend nor understand.

"is something wrong?" he asks with concern.

you don't respond right away, and he's growing worried. but when you finally speak, it's not the answer he's expecting nor wanted.

"I don't think I can do this anymore, sae," you reply, voice quiet and timid.

he freezes and his chest tightens. "what do you mean?" he asks, his voice almost cracking.

you don't look at him.

staring down at the ground, you let out a shaky breath and admit the truth.

"I can't be with you. not anymore."

sae wakes up, heart pounding. the room is dark and he reaches towards the other side of the bed to grab you close and hold you. only.. you're not there.

oh, that's right. that wasn't a dream. you really did leave him a couple months ago. the bed feels large and empty without you. it feels cold. he vaguely remembers your words, something about how he doesn't prioritize you and that you can't be with him, not when you feel like you're not important to him.

sae recalls something you asked him a month prior to your breakup.

"saeeee.. if I ever die, or something happened to me, would you ever be with someone else?

back then, he had scoffed at your ridiculous question. but now, the answer is clear to him.

no, he doesn't think he will ever be with someone that isn't you.

reo

reo is a lot of things. he's attractive, kind, smart, and loaded with money. girls come up to him but he knows that they're really after his money. they don't care about him.

but you're different. you loved reo and you didn't care about how much money he had. thus, he fell for you hard. he loved you ten times more than you loved him, and he wasn't afraid of showing it. and he believes that you love him more than anything as well. that he's your one true love.

so why.. does you hear you talking with your friends about how you're only with him for his wealth?

he hears you, in your room, talking to your friend about something. he's come over to surprise you, so you have no idea he's about ten inches away from your door. but when reo hears you talking on the phone, he leans his ear closer to the door, only to feel his heart get crushed once you hears you talking about him.

"yeah, yeah.. sure." you admit, rather casually, on the phone. "sure he's nice and all, but his money is way nicer. mm, actually I might break up with him soon. he's kind of getting boring."

reo doesn't know what to do. he's unable to move and his feels like he's about to cry. after all this time, you really were only with him for his money. what about the times you kissed him, cheered for him at his soccer games, and came over to his house to spend time with him? what about all those times you sat in the bathtub with him, when you let him sleep on your lap like he was a kitten, or when you giggled putting pink clips in his hair? what about... what about.... what about... what about...

the nightmare fractures, like a mirror.

he lets out a yell, breathing heavily as he wakes up. his loud scream unfortunately woke you up from your slumber too, and you turn around to face him.

"reo...what happened..." you mutter, voice groggy with sleep.

reo feels bad that he woke you up, but the dream felt too real. did you really love him? he knows he shouldn't doubt you, but..

"do you love me?" he blurts out.

"...huh?"

he stutters, embarrassed that he suddenly asked that outloud.

reo doesn't have the chance to explain himself before you say, "of course I love you reo. that's why I'm with you. are you okay?"

"uh..yeah I'm fine." he replies.

you scooch in closer to him and rest your head on his chest.

"do you want a new bag?" he suddenly asks.

"reo," you grumble, sighing at his antics. "I told you I don't need you to buy things for me. seriously, save your money."

yeah, whatever that dream was, he thinks to himself. it's just a dream, it's not real.

kaiser

kaiser did not have a loving childhood. from his mother who abandoned him to his abusive father, he grew up with a life full of hardship and troubles.

but despite everything, he found solace in you, his childhood friend who he was now dating. you provided him with the sense of comfort, you made his life happier, and he doesn't really want to imagine where he would be without you. he thinks you're gorgeous and absolutely breathtaking. you kiss away his troubles and he wants you only to himself. he's not the best at this relationship thing, but you're patient with him.

his dream starts during a soccer match. the crowd is roaring with excitement as usual, but something is off. he's standing on the field, looking for you, the one who's always by his side and cheering him on. but no matter how hard he looked around, you weren't there.

he feels the panic rising in his chest, but he won't show it. kaiser doesn't lose. he's a winner. the best. and he always will be.

that's when he sees it.

you, standing there, with isagi. you're laughing and your eyes are full of joy, but it's not because of him. why the hell were you even with isagi????

you meet his gaze, but your eyes are cold and emotionless. there's nothing there for him. the love you once had for him is gone.

he swallows. fine. he doesn't need you. he's the best after all.

but he wants to smash his hand against the wall and scream why?

as soon as the whistle blows, signaling the start of the match, everything goes dark.

kaiser wakes up with a start, gasping for air and his chest is heaving. there's sweat clinging to his chest and the uncomfortably, heavy weight of the dream. it leaves a bad taste in his mouth, irritating him.

but then he feels it. the familiar warmth next to him. you were there, besides him. his eyes snap towards you. he suddenly feels foolish. the dream wasn't real. of course, he hadn't actually lost you.

you were awake, your hand gently reaching out to him in an attempt to calm him.

"micha, are you okay?"

he shifts away slightly, brushing a hand through his hair in frustration.

"I'm fine." he scoffs.

"you're not fine," you speak gently. "you had a bad dream huh? you can talk to me. I'll always be here for you. you'll never lose me, ever."

kaiser's jaw tightens for a moment before finally letting out a shaky breath and relaxing. he's afraid of losing you, of how vulnerable he is around you, how you make him feel so many emotions he's not sure he wants.

but he smirks.

"course.." kaiser starts, "i don't lose, schatz."

[poohsources]

🐝  *  ―  𝑷𝑰𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮 / 𝒀𝑬𝑨𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑺𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑵𝑪𝑬 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑺.

❛  i can't stop thinking about you even when i try.  ❜ ❛  every time i see you, it's like my heart skips a beat.  ❜ ❛  i never realized how much i needed you until you weren't there.  ❜ ❛  do you ever feel like there's something missing ... like a piece of your heart is somewhere else?  ❜ ❛  i wish i had the courage to tell you how i feel.  ❜ ❛  if only you knew how much you truly mean to me.  ❜ ❛  do you ever wonder what it would be like if things were different between us?  ❜ ❛  sometimes i wonder if you ever think about me the way i think about you.  ❜ ❛  i had a lot of dreams about you recently.  ❜ ❛  somehow, you're always on my mind.  ❜ ❛  i think i've been in love with you since the day we met - scratch that, i know i've been in love with you since the day we met.  ❜ ❛  my biggest wish is to hold you close and never let you go.  ❜ ❛  all my life i've felt like a part of me was missing, but with you i've finally found it.  ❜ ❛  you deserve better than who i am right now, but i'm gonna keep trying to become someone you do deserve.  ❜ ❛  every time you smile at me, i get this flutter in my chest.  ❜ ❛  do you think i'll ever be worthy of your love?  ❜ ❛  i want to be the person to make you happy. the one person you can always come to with whatever you need.  ❜ ❛  will we ever get another chance together?  ❜ ❛  you were the best thing that's ever happened to me.  ❜ ❛  my biggest regret is ever letting you go.  ❜ ❛  i'm still in love with you ... and i honestly never stopped.  ❜ ❛  when i wake up in the morning, you're the first person i want to see.  ❜ ❛  every time i wake up, i check if you wrote me another message.  ❜ ❛  i wish i could be as important to you as you are to me.  ❜ ❛  it hurts when you don't talk to me like you used to.  ❜ ❛  i miss everything about you, your touch, your laugh, your smile. i wish i could have that back.  ❜ ❛  i want to fall asleep wrapped in your arms.  ❜ ❛  hold me closer; i always feel safer when you're with me.  ❜ ❛  there's so much i wish i was able to tell you.  ❜ ❛  i know things aren't easy right now, but i want to remain a fixture in your life. after all, you're one in mine.  ❜ ❛  i miss the way you always made me smile.  ❜ ❛  you're the reason i keep holding on.  ❜ ❛  maybe we're supposed so to remain a case of 'right person, wrong time' forever.  ❜ ❛  if only you knew how i feel about you.  ❜ ❛  i'm yearning to hold your hand in mine.  ❜ ❛  i think you are the one for me, and i hope one day i'll be the one for you, too.  ❜ ❛  do you think i'll ever become more than a friend to you?  ❜ ❛  my heart belongs to you, always and forever.  ❜ ❛  my first instinct is to protect you, no matter the cost.  ❜ ❛  i've been thinking about us a lot lately.  ❜

[pythonmoth]

cw: violence. heavy torture. stress incontinence (brief). hurt/no comfort.

simon x f!reader. poly tf141. father figure price.

Last | Next

It's calm.

The sea breeze brushes against your cheeks, your skin warm under the sun, and your toes squirming in the sand. You've been begging your parents to take you to the beach for months since middle school started, and now you're here.

Family. Your cousins, your siblings, your aunties and uncles. Nothing can ruin it! It's perfect.

A bucket of sea water hits you from the back, making you gasp. In an instant, you're up. "You guys are dead!" you scream, laughing as you chase after them.

It's so, so nice.

Then, a weird smell makes you pause as you're chasing your favorite older cousin, knee deep in the ocean.

It brings you back to when you were a toddler, picking up one of your grandfather's old rags, forgotten in a corner. It'd seen too many raining days, all crumpled up. It was sour. Foul.

Almost like poison.

But why did you remember such thing right now?

Your cousin's dark eyes glint, but you can't focus. No, you can't move as she gently makes you lay down in the water, claiming it's a game, and sits on top of you, the sea water filling your lungs.

You scream and fight, your little strength leaving you, until you're finally breaking through the surface.

Another splash of salty water, much colder, wakes you up with a gasp.

"Up" Price's voice says.

You bite back a whimper of pain when Soap roughly grips your hair and drags you up along with the chair from the floor, since Price kicked you the night before. Soap doesn't look at you even once.

"Since you won't open your mouth, let's continue" the captain hums, looking mildly entertained.

"Price, I genuinely don't know anything. I'm not a traitor. You have to believe me, please—"

Smack.

"Save it. It all points to you, so you either speak now, or we start having fun".

Everything hurts, it's all fuzzy and every single inch of your body is burning, yet you still look up at Price, then at Soap. Again, he won't even look at you.

"Where's Simon?" you mumble, trembling. There's silence, but you don't let it stretch. "Please, I really have nothing to do with any of this. Be reasonable. There's nothing in it for me. Why would I sell us out?!"

The door springs open, and your head snaps up. Your world crumbles down as Simon comes in with a little box.

The tools.

At once, you reach another level of panic.

Pure, unadulterated dread.

"Stop! No. No, please. I'm innocent. Simon. Please, stop this!" you wail loudly, your hands clenching hard on the armrests of the chair, uselessly trying to keep them from getting to your fingers.

It doesn't matter how hard you cry out for them to listen. It doesn't matter how badly you fight, leaning forward to push your head against Simon's chest, pleading with him.

There's no coming back from this.

Please. I love you. Please.

When the first nail is ripped off from your fingertip, the intensity of your screams makes Price look away for the first time.

It takes three fingernails and a handful of questions you can't focus on for Soap to turn away from you.

Five.

Away.

Please.

Eight.

It all feels so far away.

Distantly, you feel warmth, right on the chair. For a happy moment you melt into it, too tired to think much of it. Simon's eye twitches at the sight, the white in his eyes bloodshot, and he has to physically stop himself from saying anything.

"I want to die" you croak out, your chin pressed to your chest.

Your heart is pounding in your ears, in your raw fingertips. Your voice doesn't feel yours anymore.

"No. Give me their names".

"I don't know, goddammit!" you scream, your face contorted with pain and anger. So much anger. "Fuck you! I don't know shit. I'm sick and tired of this. I didn't do anything!"

It doesn't matter when Simon rips off another fingernail.

Nine.

It doesn't matter when Soap presses the same disgusting rag against your face, the cold salty water filling your lungs again.

You don't fight.

What for? They want information you can't provide. And you're angry.

Ten.

"I'm breaking up with you" you say, your voice firm, despite the intense shaking in your body.

The pain must have cleared your mind because you just look straight forward, not meeting Ghost's eyes as you speak.

You don't want to look at him.

"I don't want your regret" you continue, your heart slowing down. There's an old bloody spot on the door. You focus on it. "The three of you are dead to me when this is all over".

"Enough chatting. Go on!" Price snaps. You don't hear the trembling in his voice.

The salty water just keeps on coming.

Maybe you hear it. You don't care.

You're not sure for long it goes. Half of your toes are throbbing by the time Price storms out of the room, Soap and Ghost gathering their things to leave.

There are deep cuts in the arch of your feet, several of your toenails scattered on the floor, and the foul smell of urine and blood. Your throat is sore and raw from screaming, and sobbing.

You must've passed out, because you wake up to Ghost's hands untying you quickly, words of apology leaving his lips, curses and promises. You can hear Soap rushing in, the two of them arguing and then running.

Gasps and curses are heard all around the base as Ghost takes you to the medics, demanding them to tend to you now.

It's an order.

[tbaluver]

When You Have A Baby- The Love And DeepSpace Men

pairings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader

genre: fluff fluff

a/n: writing these are so much fun <3 any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! if you have any more ideas for me to write my requests are always open! enjoy!

⋆｡‧��ʚ♡ɞ˚‧｡⋆

Xavier:

He would be so smitten with his newborn. He won't stop internally and externally praising your strength for carrying and birthing his child. He would compare the size of your new baby's hand and his hand. "Their hands are so tiny" He would whisper. As he holds his new born so closely, he vows to make sure no harm came to the two of you.

Your baby room would have a couple plushies that either you won from the claw machines. He can put the baby to sleep so quick whether it was rocking the baby or reading them a bedtime story.

He's very protective but also very cautious. He'll make sure the baby would be all bundled up and comfortable before you two leave the house. Also very soft and sweet with the baby. Spoils the baby with so much love with forehead kisses and snuggles!

This man loves to cuddle the baby. When you come home and you don't see him anywhere, then he's probably in the nursery. He would sit on the rocking chair with the baby in his arms. He just wants to spend as much time as possible with the baby. Nothing in the world can compare to the happiness that brings him where his child is sleeping peacefully in his arms. One of your favorite moments is when you two would be peacefully asleep, the baby safely and comfortably in between you two.

Zayne:

He might not show it physically, but he's definitely in pain seeing you in labor. He'll be by your bedside, gently holding your hand and letting you squeeze his hand as much as you need too. It's all worth it in the end when he sees his baby with his own eyes. Inside he's melting but he keeps his cool.

Like I said in my pregnancy post this man is always ready. Ready whenever you were pregnant and ready when the baby is born.

When the baby cries when your both asleep, he'll assure you that he can do it and let you go back to sleep. He'll handle anything whether it's feeding the baby, cradling, changing the diaper, or helping put the baby back to sleep, as long as you get some rest. He would even be the first to wake up just to check up on the baby just so you can have a few more minutes of rest before you have to get up.

One of your favorite memories would be seeing him handle the baby so well in his arms in the nursery. You would snake your arms around him and rest your chin on his shoulder as he continues cradling the baby.

He handles his new responsibilities as a father so well. He can barely pull himself from the baby. It's like he had everything under control and nothing can affect him as long as you were okay. He made sure to validate any frustrations and anything you were anxious about. He was always there to reassure you.

Rafayel:

His eyes would be shimmering from glee as he cradled the baby. "They're so tiny!" He would whisper shout, carefully not trying to wake the baby. The first time he ever held the baby, he didn't think it would be possible for his body to let go of the small bundle of joy in his arms.

You are so strong for having to take care of two babies. The one you birthed and your husband, Rafayel. He playfully pretends to be your baby so you can also take care of him like you do with your new born.

You guys would have such a beautiful baby room. The room would have such warm lighting. He would have the walls painted with what he had envisioned and a mix of furniture that you both planned out. You guys would have a crib mobile that is obviously sea themed.

You would also walk in on him many times cradling the baby and encouraging his baby to say his first words would be anything of dad or the baby has to show him first when they learn how to walk.

He would def take so much memories of you and your baby. He'll put some baby safe paint on your baby's hands and stamp their hand print on a small canvas so when they grow up, you'll all remember the time they were so tiny. Finding you again was a miracle in itself and having this baby with you, he would need or create a different word to describe it all.

Sylus:

He would be right at your side during labor, wiping your sweat off your forehead and giving you reassurance. "You're doing so well sweetie. Our baby will be out soon."

He does everything that he can without protests. He would give warm baths and sweet kisses to your baby's head every moment he can.

He makes it all look easy and even handles any chores around the house himself or makes Luke and Kieran do it so you have time to recuperate. He would spend quality time with you any time he can to make you feel just as loved if not more with your growing family.

It would physically pain him to leave you and his newborn at home when he had to leave for business. Although neither of you would have gotten that much sleep in weeks, a part of him wished that it would never end. Even if it would be just for a few hours, he did not want to miss anything that happens. What if the baby laughs and he wasn't there to take a video of it? What if an emergency happened and you needed him? He would make you record everything you and your baby do because he doesn't want to miss any milestone in his baby's life.

Just like you, he would spoil the baby rotten. When he would come back from his business trips or meetings he would bring back gifts for you or anything that reminded him of you and your baby.

You would ban him from singing any lullabies to your baby but sometimes when you're already asleep he would secretly sing your baby a song. He would feel fully content in his life.

[venomvalley]

FEED ME!

PART III: MILK AND COOKIES ↬ sevika x pregnant!reader | 4.7k words

SUMMARY: The third trimester.

TAGS: 18+ (oral and fingering, both receiving). fluff. happy ending.

NOTES: this is the last chapter and im so sad about it. already working on an epilogue i love these two so bad

-> READ ON AO3 | 1 / 2 / SERIES MASTERLIST

Sevika is officially at a loss. She's never experienced this kind of… affection before, and maybe it’s a pregnancy thing, but you just won’t leave her alone. Constantly touching her, talking to her, following her around both the apartment and the streets like you can't bear to be apart.

It's weird. Terrifying, as much as she hates to admit it. Because she actually likes it. Has gotten a taste of what she's been missing, and she can't get enough.

Her favorite moments are when you join her in bed, all sleepy and grumbling. Smelling like her soap, wearing her clothes, laying in her sheets. Hers. Hers.

She's never been able to say that.

You curl up against her side as best as your belly allows, cheek atop her shoulder, arm slung across her chest to play with her hair. She purrs like a cat, turns her head to give you better access to the strands that have grown a bit too long for her liking.

“Found a midwife while I was out yesterday,” she says. “She's probably delivered half the babies in the Undercity.”

You exhale a soft breath. “That's a relief.”

“We’re going tomorrow.”

The hand in her hair moves to shift her head toward you, touch light against the curve of her jaw.

Your eyes mist over with tears, and your chin dimples as you peer up at her. “Thank you, Sevika. I mean it. I'm grateful.”

She nods, leans forward to rest her lips against your forehead. “I know.”

You sleep in late the next morning, a new routine you’ve picked up over that last couple of weeks. Late enough that she has to wake you up for your unofficial appointment, and you sulk in bed for the better part of twenty minutes before finally getting up to start the day.

After a long walk, you reach the building belonging to the midwife. The woman that waves you inside oozes experience with her curly grey hair and deep-set wrinkles. A pillar of the community according to the women she spoke with (Sevika had to make sure that she would take good care of you, after all). Brought into the world half the kids walking around the Undercity. Stern but loving.

“It’s nice to meet you, dear. I’m Lyra.”

You smile in return and give her your own name, accepting the arm that the woman offers to help you onto the stoop.

Lyra orders Sevika to wait outside, says the exam shouldn’t take long. It makes her skin itch, the thought of leaving you alone with this stranger, but you give her one final, reassuring smile, and she knows she’s outnumbered.

Fine. She can wait. But she doesn’t have to be happy about it.

She spends her time smoking cigarettes and people-watching. The streets are busy this time of day, families passing through, couples holding hands. A father carries his daughter on his shoulders, her tiny hands curled beneath his chin, and she thinks of her old man. If he’d see the person she became and look upon her with pride. Maybe he’d tell her that he didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about, that his grief over losing her mother and brother corrupted him. That he fucked up big time with raising her the way he did.

As a teenager she was rebellious, desperate to free herself from under his thumb. Got into the wrong crowd more times than she can count. An unfortunate side effect of anger and impulse—a dangerous recipe she’s relieved she grew out of.

For the longest time, she was left with that anger. It never failed her, never broke her heart, never left her behind. It was safe.

Your presence hasn’t fixed everything in her life, but it’s softened her edges. Cured the loneliness that added fuel to the fire. And every day that passes means one less day she might have with you. She knows the kid is due soon, a month at most.

She can’t lose you like she lost her mother. But she’s in too deep to back out. Couldn’t if she tried.

Still, the thought terrifies her.

And although she’s never considered herself a good candidate for parenthood, for building a family in general, she’s accepted that she now has a kid to raise. A less scary prospect when it’s you she’s raising it—her—with. You’ll be a great mom, already are despite the circumstances.

When the front door creaks open, she shoves away from the wall and stamps out her cigarette, waving the smoke away (even though she stands at the corner of the building).

You step out with a wide smile and a new canvas bag looped around your arm, waving goodbye to Lyra. When the door closes, you spot her immediately, reaching for her hand as she walks over.

“How was it?” she asks, leading you out into the street.

“Good. Baby’s healthy, and she thinks I have a few weeks before I give birth.” Your unoccupied hand reaches around to rub at your back. “Praise Janna, ‘cause this kid’s getting heavy.”

“I’ll rub your back when we get home.” A second-nature offer, instinct at this point.

“Oh!” You squeeze at her hand, take a step in front of her to say, “Can we get some more sweetbread while we’re out? I’ve been craving some all day.”

Your eyes shimmer at the mention, and she fully expects you to start drooling at any moment.

“Yeah, we can.”

An expression of relief paints your face, and she can’t help the smile that stretches her lips. “I absolutely love you right now.”

Her heart explodes inside her chest. She wonders how deeply you meant it, then decides that she’d rather not find out. Better to exist within the realm of her own fantasy for a little while longer.

.

.

.

The kid’s due any day now, and you’re ready to lose your mind. She’s given more massages in the last few weeks than she ever has in her life. Every day introduces another thing for you to cry over. Sleeping is difficult, as is every other task.

But today, she touches your stomach for the first time. Lays a hand against the taut skin and registers the flutter of… something beneath her palm.

“Feel that? She’s kicking the shit out of me.”

She looks up at you with a raised brow. “Takes after her mom.” Says it just to watch you giggle and roll your eyes.

“I’m not that bad.”

“You have a lot more room than she does.”

This is her life now. A realization that catches her off-guard, stops her in her tracks, and your hand reaches over to comb through her hair as her entire world falls apart. Like her center of gravity has shifted—like there’s no gravity at all anymore.

“Hey. You okay?”

She looks up at you, brows furrowed in thought. “Yeah.”

Everything has changed, and soon, things will change even more. She’s already bribed a handful of lackeys to do her jobs the next few weeks, and she’s lost sight of the main goal. Can’t really pinpoint when the switch happened.

Except she can: the moment you grabbed her hand that night in the alley—the moment you dug yourself a home in her heart.

But she has a plan. Set you up in a quaint house in the better part of the city, get in touch with some old friends that could hire you on for some money, and continue her duties as Silco’s right hand. It’s selfish of her, wanting the best of both worlds, but maybe there doesn’t have to be an either/or. Maybe she can have both.

Maybe her old man was wrong.

(Shit, she's turning into Vander—the Vander who prioritized his kids before the good of the Undercity.

If she starts considering deals with Enforcers, she might as well hang it up.)

A soft kiss to her forehead as she lays her cheek on your shoulder. “What are you thinking about?”

Nothing you need to concern yourself with.

She exhales a breath through her nose. “I’m not used to this. Being happy, I guess.”

“Me neither. It’s weird, isn’t it? The good kind.”

“We should move. Get a bigger place.”

“What, you don't like it here?”

The mocking grin you shoot her makes her lip curl. “No. I never have.”

You roll your eyes. “I was joking. I think it's a fantastic idea.”

“Later, then. After the kid comes.”

You press an open-mouthed kiss to her shoulder, snuggling closer into her side. “Fine by me.”

When she gets home the next day after a chaotic morning of running around the docks, she finds you in bed with a large book and a pen.

“So. I got this today.” You hold it up to show her the covering, the letters embroidered in the black fabric.

“You sure you’re supposed to be holding something that heavy?” she asks, brows lowered as she walks up to the bed with an outstretched hand.

Lips twisting into a frown, you pull the book to your chest. “Not the point. Look at the title.”

100 BABY NAMES AND THE MEANINGS BEHIND THEM.

She exhales a laugh. “Where the hell did you find that?”

“Tayla brought it by. Gave us some free cookies, too.”

“Really? I didn’t see any.”

You glance away from her, lowering the book to your lap. “I might’ve indulged a little bit, but to be fair, I didn’t know how long you’d be gone.”

Something warm swirls in her chest. Affection—an emotion she welcomes with a small smile. “I told you I’d be back today.”

She takes a seat next to you on the bed, peering over your shoulder to the page below. You’re on the letter S now, some names underlined in pen.

You blow out a breath, tilting your head back to rest on her shoulder. “I need your help picking a name.”

“I'm not the creative type.”

“You don't have to be. The list is right here.”

In truth, she doesn't want to choose. It's not her kid, not her future to determine.

“You're her mom,” she says, quiet, words stained with a sadness she didn't realize she even had.

You fall quiet for a moment, picking at a corner of the page with your thumb.

“If you want, and only if you want, you can be in her life, too—”

She says your name with a resigned sigh.

You turn to look at her, a hand braced against her thigh. A searing brand even through the fabric of her pants. “I know we haven't talked about it, but… I don't expect you to take care of me forever, especially since I'm gonna have a baby. I just—”

“Stop.”

She hasn't talked about it because it isn't a conversation she wants to have. Confronting the inevitable means moving forward, and she doesn't want to. She wants to live in her little bubble where the Big Bad is defeated and she might actually get a happy fucking ending.

“I'm serious. You've done enough for me. She's my responsibility, not yours, but—”

“You both are. End of story.”

“I wanna be more than your responsibility, Sevika.”

At the hurt look on your face, the prickling of tears in your eyes, she panics. Backtracks as quick as she can. “No, you are. I didn't mean it like that.”

“Then I want you in her life. Taking care of her, teaching her, loving her the way you do me.” You rest a hand on her cheek, smile sad and watery. “The way I do you.”

She doesn't know what to say. If she can even form words right now from the way her tongue hardens to stone inside her mouth. But her heart tenders, dissolves at your words.

You love her. You actually love her. Stupid, naïve, weak woman.

She kisses you, soft and sweet. Cradles the back of your neck in her palm like you're the only thing keeping her world glued together.

“You mean that,” she mutters, nose brushing against yours, lips a ghosting touch against your own.

“That I love you?” She nods, and you grin. “Have you met yourself? How the hell could I not?”

She exhales a laugh. Relief relaxes the pouch of her lungs—relief and something a lot more sickly.

Fear. Can't remember the last time she's been loved, been open to it. So far beyond possibility's reach she couldn't grasp it if she tried. For most of her years alive, she hasn't even wanted it. At its very core, love is what killed her mother and destroyed her father from the inside out. It makes you weak, stupid, impulsive. Irrational. A word that has no business in her vocabulary.

So why, then, does the word seem so appealing when it's you?

“I would like for this… thing between us to last a while. But I don't want you to feel pressured into it.” You shrug. “I come with a lot of baggage.”

She exhales through her nose. Says, “So do I.”

You roam your eyes over her face, a soft smile stretching your lips, before you plant the book in her lap. “Pick. I've already underlined the ones that interest me.”

“And if it's a boy?”

“It won't be. I'm telling you, I sense it. The baby whispers to me in my dreams.”

She actually laughs at that. “That another pregnancy thing?”

“Yep. Now pick. Don't make me tell you again.”

With a raise of her brows (you already have the mom voice down), she turns to the page. Runs her finger over each underlined name, testing them on her tongue, before landing on:

Stella — ‘star’

“This one.”

You peer down at the one she chose, cheek squished against her arm. “Why that one?”

She pulls a face. “Well…” It reminds her of how you've been the brightest thing in her life thus far, and if everything goes to plan, the kid won't be limited to the cage of the Undercity–she'll have the whole universe at her fingertips. “I like the sound of it.”

You nod, slow and thoughtful. “Stella… Ste…lla. Stella.” A tilt of your head. “I like it. It's pretty.”

So are you, she wants to say, but she stays silent.

.

.

.

You're ready to pop this kid out.

Lyra stopped by yesterday, examined you behind the locked door of the bedroom, and said that it was time. Suggested a more… unorthodox method to induce labor.

(”Sex is the most natural thing in the entire world,” she had said, turning to Sevika with both hands on her hips and a deep frown. “Why do you act so surprised, dear?”)

You're a lot less open to the idea, no matter how ready you are to be done with pregnancy.

“I just don't understand how you could want me,” spoken softly, melancholic.

Sat on the bed, Sevika soothes a palm over your thigh. “What do you mean?”

“I mean physically. ‘Cause of the…” You motion to your stomach, and she shushes you with a kiss.

“I don't care. You're more than that.”

“Yeah, but—”

“I want to help you.”

Your brows cant upward, a war waging in your brain as your eyes dart back and forth over her shoulder. “Are you sure you want to?”

“I'm sure.”

With a relieved breath, you nod your head. “Gods, please help me.”

Sevika is not soft, but she has to be with you. Wants to be.

You lay down in the sheets that smell so much like you and spend five minutes getting comfortable, fluffing the pillows behind you and removing clothes and adjusting your hips. You spread your legs and her first instinct is to bite, to scar the plump curve of your inner thigh, but she can't. Won't. Too much trust in the way your soft body blooms for her, fingers delicate on your full tits.

“Are you sure about this?” she asks. A loaded question—it isn't the act itself, but the person you've chosen for it. She wants to be seen as worthy after what you've been through.

“I've had the last ten minutes to change my mind,” you say, lips spreading into a dopey grin. “Need it so bad. Need you to help me.”

She closes her eyes, takes a steady breath at the sound of you so needy and sweet. Smooths a rough palm over the lower curve of your belly before pressing a kiss to your cunt. Already slick, puffy against her lips. Her tongue licks over your clit and you whine, fingers twisting around hers so tight the joints creak.

“Shit, that's—” You're cut off by a heavy sigh when she sucks the bundle of nerves into her mouth, soft and rhythmic, humming against you.

Best thing she's ever tasted, skin so soft under her hand, so wet she risks drowning. What a way to fucking go. You tilt your hips up to rut against her face, and she rides out your movements, offering up her tongue for you to grind against. Her hands move to your thighs but you bat her flesh one away.

“Fingers, Sev, please–need your—”

She's quick to split you open on two, groaning at the slick heat that sucks her in, at the way your shudder and keen high in your throat.

Between the rhythmic thrusting of her fingers and her tongue licking over your clit, it doesn't take much for you to cum. A surprisingly short time, in fact. Must have something to do with hormones, who fucking knows. It's hot. A beautiful thimg to watch—and feel, fuck—as you fall apart from just her fingers and tongue. Thighs tensing over her shoulders, insides fluttering, a hand fisted in her hair.

When you whine and shove at her head, she leans away with a long inhale of breath, sitting back to look at you still spread out beneath her, chest heaving, cunt plump and glistening. You've made a wet spot on the sheets under your ass.

You swallow with a click, arms stretching over your head. “Damn. Didn't realize how bad I needed that.”

She huffs out a laugh, wiping the lower half of her face off with her shirt (still can’t get over how wet you were; never seen anything like it in her life). “Glad I could help.”

“Your mouth should be illegal.”

She crawls up on the bed then settles in beside you as you lavish her with praise, basking in the afterglow with a hand in hers. Heat flushes up the back of her neck and courses down the length of her spine when you beg to kiss her, to taste yourself on her tongue.

You'll be the death of her.

She curls a hand over the back of your neck and slots her lips against yours, and immediately, you lick into her mouth. A moan vibrates your chest as you pull her closer, both arms wrapping around her neck.

“Can I return the favor?”

The question comes out of nowhere. By the steady rhythm of your breath, she thought you fell asleep ten minutes ago, but you're already rising to your knees to peer down at her with an expectant grin.

“That's not why I did it.”

“So I have to beg?”

A very nice thought. One she'd like to indulge in under different circumstances.

“How would you even—”

You roll your eyes. “For the love of Janna, I'm pregnant, not dying.” You scoot over to the side of the bed then grab one of the pillows you use to prop yourself up. “You can just lay on the edge of the bed, and I'll get on my knees in the floor.”

Well. You're more than willing, and she might actually combust if she doesn't cum soon. A win-win situation.

She takes a seat on the edge of the bed and helps you pull her briefs off.

When she spreads her legs, you tug your lower lip between your teeth, sweeping your eyes over her bare pussy. “I'm a little rusty, so you'll have to forgive me.”

She doesn't give a shit, will probably cum as soon as you get your mouth on her. And that's what she tells you.

With a teasing wriggle of your brows, you lean in, the flat of your tongue licking her from hole to clit. Her thighs twitch on either side of your shoulders, breath hissing through her teeth.

Shit, how long has it been since she—

“I don't have any other way to thank you for being so good to me,” you say, and her ears burn when you suck the lips of her pussy into your mouth. “This’ll have to do.”

She's nothing but a white-hot ball of need at this point. Heat broiling beneath her skin, coiling dangerously in the pit of her stomach.

You gaze up at her with low-lidded eyes as you swirl your tongue over her clit, watching her face twist up in pleasure.

Already, she's close. Thighs twitching, hips tilting up into your face. You circle two fingers over the entrance of her cunt, dipping in with a wet squelch.

When you lean away with a grin, she almost resorts to begging, and then you slide those fingers inside her, eyes locked onto the way she swallows you up.

“Fuck. You're so wet, Sev,” you pant, the thumb of your other hand raising to circle over her clit.

She knows. Shit, she knows—

“Please,” whispered under her breath.

Your soft gaze meets hers, and she's never felt so raw before. Flayed alive. Stripped down and vulnerable. The word means more than just begging. Sevika does not beg. Hasn't needed to in a very long time.

But she does for you.

“I know, baby.” You press a kiss to her puffy clit. “I'll take care of you.”

She will not cry. She absolutely will not fucking cry right now over some stupid little thing you said between her legs.

She collapses back against the bed and throws an arm over her face as you work her up to a quick orgasm with the steady rhythm of your fingers and tongue. She spreads her legs even wider when the coil in her belly snaps to keep from crushing your head between her thighs, and she grunts into the bend of her arm from how tight her limbs lock up.

It takes a good fifteen seconds before she can even breathe again, and she looks down the line of her body, flinching at the wet kiss you press to her stomach. Then another a little higher, and another, your chin sticky and slick as it glides over her skin.

“Thank you,” you say, reaching for her hand to help you climb on the bed and straddle her waist.

You're beautiful like this. Sated and sleepy and still so wet that your pussy leaves a puddle on her stomach. But the heated look you give her is a warning that you won’t be satisfied with just the one time.

Three rounds later—with you riding her face, and her leaned back against the wall, and you bent over the bed, and at one point you go to the kitchen for a snack and bend her over the counter, and then she fucks you in the shower when you’re supposed to bgetting clean—you’re both curled beneath the sheets, your belly pressing into her side, halfway between wake and sleep.

But something gnaws at her. Something she should've done months ago.

“I feel like shit. About… the way I talked to you when we first met.”

You sigh, and her heart begins to pound.

“Yeah, you were an asshole. A huge asshole.” At her guilty wince, you curl closer into her, cheek resting on her shoulder. Your hand soothes over the skin of her stomach. “But I get it now. You don't like to get close to people.”

“That's a nice way to put it.” She exhales a breath through her nose. Can't remember the last time she's tried to conjure up an apology. “I really am sorry, though. I want you to know that.”

You hum, voice thickening with the lull of sleep. “I appreciate it. Guess I knew there was more to you than what you show people.”

“Did the kid tell you that, too?”

“Oh, fuck you.”

“You already did. Four times.”

You laugh, and her sky shines a little brighter.

Everything is good. Great, in fact. But that’s the thing. Good things are fleeting in her life. Something always comes along to fuck it up.

She just hopes that the good days last a little while longer this time.

.

.

.

Fresh out the womb, the girl already looks like you—the shape of your eyes, the curve of your lips, your fingers and toes. Chubby-cheeked, a head full of thick hair, eyes blinking the world into existence.

Sevika does not make life, she destroys it, and yet in the same hands that have killed many, she holds creation in its purest form. Her face is one of the first things this baby will ever see.

She wants to cry.

She thinks of her mom, dying alone on that cold floor, and her vision mists over. Not this time. She’s older now, stronger, more lucid to the world. She'll do right by you—both of you.

But she’s terrified. Doesn’t know if she has it in her.

A trembling hand curls over her wrist, and she looks over, greeted by the gentle curve of your smile.

“Beautiful, isn’t she?” you whisper, voice dragged through the jagged rocks of the river.

All she can do is nod, a thumb soothing over the fine wisps of your daughter’s hair. Curious eyes peer up at her, squinting, wiggling tiny little fingers.

She’s never held a baby before. Always thought them too fragile, but Lyra insisted that if a baby can squeeze through a vagina, it can handle being held. It made her feel better, if a little flustered, and you had laughed yourself to tears at the look on her face.

But the woman had a point.

She won't touch her with her prosthetic, though. For all Lyra's talk about hardiness and resilience, that part of her has no business near such an innocent thing. It's seen and felt too much blood. Caused it.

You notice, though. Of course you do.

“We can put a sheet around it,” you say in an attempt to reassure her, trailing a finger over the metal. “It's gonna be hard to hold her with one hand.”

“I'll manage.”

You let it go, turning back to nurse your glass of water, and she's grateful. Wouldn't budge on this no matter how hard you try.

She holds the baby until she can't any longer, when it's time for her to feed and the room fills with fussing cries. Watches you for a long time, long enough for you to notice and look up at her with a smile, eyes turning to those crescent moons that she loves so much.

Loves. Huh.

Yeah, she—fuck, she loves you. The realization scares the shit out of her, but the sight of you cooing at your nursing baby (hers, too, if she wants it, and she doesn't think she's wanted anything more in all her life) makes the fear inconsequential.

Now, she just has to figure out where the hell to go from here. How to be what you need.

A new place is a good start. She did promise you, after all.

[bokutoko]

ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ʟᴏꜱɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ

he was late. again.

every time, when you’d fall asleep waiting for him and wake up the following morning, ᴋᴜʀᴏᴏ'ꜱ pillow was cold. his mug that always held his morning coffee would already be in the sink when you’d make your own. even the usual lingering smell of his aftershave would be nonexistent when you’d step in the bathroom to wash your face.

the i’m sorry flowers he’d gotten for you a month ago sat on the kitchen counter, wilting, rotting, dying.

it was routine at this point: you’d let out a long sigh, listen to his ‘i’m sorry, i promise i’ll do better’ spiel, accept his apology, and the two of you would move on.

your apartment that once felt like home lost all its gleaming lights—now, sitting in the dark, you wondered just how many of those promises he’s broken.

every time, it was the same excuse. and this time was no different.

“i’m doing all of this for you! for us! i’m doing this so you can be happy!”

you blinked, absolutely baffled. “what makes you think i’d ever be happy in an empty apartment?”

he stayed silent, and you continued, “tetsu, i don’t want money. you’re all i need—“

the ringing of his phone made your blood run cold. “i have to take this, doll,” he sighed, and without listening to another word from you, he stepped onto the balcony.

watching him through the glass door, you felt worlds apart. you were never the first choice anymore. fighting on the front lines for a war you were bound to lose, you found yourself fatally wounded. even the bravest, strongest soldiers had their breaking points. and you’d finally hit yours.

it didn’t take long for kuroo to end his phone call, but it took even less time for you to pack and leave everything you knew, without a trace.

PART TWO

a/n: i’m sorry.

*heavily inspired from taylor swift’s “you’re losing me”

masterlist | navigation

please do not copy, alter, or repost my work. ©bokutoko 2024.

[erinwantstowrite]

if you're stuck on a chapter there are a few reasons:

-your set up to the scene you're writing is not working. go back and check it

-you are not in the right POV. think about who would be the most interesting or the most entertaining or the most informative in that scene, depending on what impact you want the scene to have

-you're at the beginning of the chapter and the words aren't coming to you even though you have it planned out already? the solution is simple: you don't like what you have planned out as much as you think you do. do not force it

-solution to a lot of problems comes from a single question I ask myself: Do I choose the kind option, or the mean option? (Your readers will eat up either one)

-You find the dialogue lacking? Act it out

-Your scene feels boring or something just "ain't right" but you can't tell what it is? Try making yourself feel the emotion you want your readers to feel. If you didn't cry while writing a scene meant to make your readers bawl their eyes out, then you might not have connected to your character as well as you wanted to. Put yourself in their shoes, pretend you ARE them.

(And afterwards, please practice putting yourself back in your own shoes and taking care of your mental health. Sometimes the fucked up stuff might get to you. Healthy minds create healthy lives, and in turn, you get to keep creating.)

-Your environment might be bothering you. Take a look around you and see what's nagging you. Is your workspace not clean? Are your notes out of order? A clean/orderly workspace can help you organize your thoughts or get you into a more productive mood. (Trust me, I get it, sometimes it's really hard to keep it tidy.)

-Try white/brown/pink noise. Try listening to music, or to videos that create background noise you feel most productive with.

-Jumping jacks. Squats. Stretches. Wiggle around your room. That one scene in High School Musical where Sharpay and Ryan are warming up. It sounds ridiculous, but this is good for you, your body, and your mind. Release pent up energy, get yourself awake and focused. If you aren't able to do this, try something silly to wake your brain up. Do some puzzles, sing some songs, etc.

-Most importantly:

Did you do your laundry? Did you get enough sun? Did you drink enough water? Did you eat enough today? Did you get your favorite snack? Did you smile? Did you run in your yard like you did as a kid? Did you laugh with your friend? Did you see the way their eyes crinkle when they smile at you? Did you play with your dog? Your cat? Did you look at the flowers in the field near your house? Did you meet someone new? Did you learn something you didn't before? Did you try something you were scared of? Did it go well? Did you enjoy being yourself? Did you explore the world today? Did you live? Did you love? Did you feel? Did you breathe, and relax, and feel that everything is gonna be okay?

It might seem insignificant, but we write from the heart, not just the mind. Let your story sit in the back of your mind when you truly feel stuck. Take care of yourself, try getting out of your head. Notice the details around you, commit them to memory. Your story will wait for you. It might take a day, or days, or a week, or a month, months, or a year or years. But the story sits with you and you'll be thinking about it without actually thinking about it. When you come to your story again, it will be happy that you've grown, no matter how big or small

[gurugirl]

The Babysitter | dad!harry x babysitter!reader

Based on this request (changed some things - hope you still like it anon!)

Summary: The cute babysitter Harry's wife hired has always tempted him, but now that his wife is away for the evening Harry might just give in.

Word Count: 2,011

Warning: smut, cheating, implied age gap (your call on how large), inappropriate relationship (both consenting adults)

|main masterlist|

. . .

Harry was so fucked.

He knew better. A married man on the brink of ruining it all just for a taste of his kid’s babysitter. Truly, outrageously fucked.

He arrived home that day, knowing he’d have the house to himself all night with his wife gone out of town for a work trip. Knowing the cute babysitter would still be there, all doe-eyed and shy smiles. She definitely had a crush on him and he couldn’t stop thinking about that.

All day at work he went back and forth with the idea of it. The whole ‘fuck around and find out’ thing was more compelling when he might be able to get away with it. But it wouldn’t be worth it, he told himself even though he continued imagining what she’d feel like underneath him.

His actions completely contradicted that sound internal advice.

Because when he saw Y/n all cuddled up on his couch, a sweater draped over her shoulders and her bare legs stretched out long he allowed himself to stare for a moment. He shouldn’t have been thinking what he was but he couldn’t stop the blood rushing to his cock. He was going straight to hell for the kind of thoughts that were running through his head right then.

She slowly blinked her eyes opened and sat up with a sweet smile, “Hi. How was work?”

God, the cute, bubbly personality on her, even after just waking up from a nap… She hadn’t been tainted by years of grueling workplace drama and a sad and lonely marriage like he had and he found it refreshing.

“Was good. Uh,” he scratched the back of his neck, keeping his eyes on hers, “Everything go all right today here?”

She nodded and moved her legs off the couch, feet hitting the floor as she nodded, “He’s the sweetest. It was a good day. He kept asking for mom so I think he’s upset that she wasn���t here this morning but I told him she’d be back tomorrow night. Fast asleep now.”

But there was something in the way she was looking at him. Like she was just waiting for him to pounce. Rounded eyes, with that shy smile as she bit the edge of her bottom lip. Like she knew what he was thinking, her own mind filled with the same filthy scenarios.

It was late. Harry always got home late on Thursdays. After dark. After his son was already asleep, and usually it was his wife greeting him.

She parted her lips as she let her gaze lower to just below the buckle on his pants and then back up to his eyes.

“Yeah. We’ll be okay without her for a night,” Harry swallowed thickly as he sat his briefcase down and moved deeper into the living room next to the couch where Y/n was still seated. “What about you?”

“What about me?” She raised her brows as she craned her head to look up at him.

“I mean… you alright too? Still seated like you’re tired. You can stay if you want.”

She blinked her eyes and then did it again, letting her pupils connect with the space at his crotch before quickly bringing them back upward to his face, “Oh… I can go. I’m sorry…”

Y/n stood up quickly but Harry caught her by her arm, “It’s okay. You don’t have to go. I just wanted to make sure you’re alright. Was really helpful having you stay late tonight.”

If she kept looking at him like that, those fuck-me eyes and plush parted lips, he wasn’t going to be able to stop himself.

“Oh. I’m glad. Was happy to help you out, Harry. I’d do it as often as you needed me to.”

He grinned and watched her moisten her soft lips when she poked her tongue out and looked up at him through her lashes. If she wasn’t begging for it he didn’t know what this was.

“You gonna stay?”

She nodded, still looking up at him as she tucked her bottom lip into her mouth.

In a moment of weakness, of sheer insanity, he raised his hand up to her face and thumbed at her bottom lip, “What’s going on, Y/n? You got something to tell me?”

She fluttered her lashes and leaned into his touch as she kept her pupils aimed right at him. But then her lips parted again and Harry found himself sliding the tip of his thumb between her lips before she wrapped her mouth around it and he felt her tongue gently lave against his pad.

Now he was the one with parted lips as he watched his kid’s babysitter suck his thumb into her mouth, eyes pinned to his still.

And before he knew it, he found himself fucked in the figurative and literal sense as he had her face down on his mattress with his cock nudged into her so deep she was keening and hissing at the bite of pain his fat length was causing.

“Shhh… be a good girl and keep quiet, yeah?”

“Mmmm!”

It was so good. It was so fucking good. He hadn’t been laid in a couple of months and the babysitter’s pussy was better than he imagined it would be. She was wet for him right away. When he got her very short shorts off her legs and buried his face between her soft thighs she was already so sensitive and dripping, wiggling and moaning like she was just as pent up as he’d been. Like she wanted it just as bad. She’d made a big mess of him and the sheets but he’d deal with clean up later.

Because when he finally pushed his throbbing dick inside of her welcoming pussy it was game over. He had her hips in both hands, tightly gripping the meat at her sides as he buried in over and over again, letting her juice coat every inch and wet his pubes with her fragrance. He watched as he stuffed her with his cock, her cute ass perked upward and she pushed back on every one of his thrusts. So pretty.

Everything was slick and gushy as he plowed into her guts, slapping his hips into her ass. He kept looking at the bedroom door (which was closed and locked) out of habit just in case, but now he was out of his mind as she trembled and drooled against the pillow his wife used.

He slowed his plunges and watched his shaft as he pulled out, “Fuck… got me all creamy, baby. Why don’t you flip over so I can see your pretty face?”

She was shaky as she dropped down to the bed, scooting herself to adjust and then spreading her thighs as he tucked right back inside of her, pelvis dipping against her own.

“Harry…” Y/n quietly breathed as she watched him. He was so thick and long, just like she knew he’d be. She never thought he’d ever step out on his wife but here he was, with his big cock driving into her, making her squelch and stretch wide for him. She almost couldn’t believe it was happening.

Harry groped at her tit, still on his knees as he steadied himself, his thighs working in, “Oh sweet girl…” he panted, quads and glutes flexing with every motion. He picked up her hand and brought her fingertips to his mouth, kissing as he pumped himself through her walls and then dragging his lips down to her palm and then wrist.

“Oh my god…” she whined before draping her arm over her mouth to keep her volume down.

“Who knew you were so filthy? Look at you letting a married man fuck your brains out.”

A muffled moan sounded from her throat as she felt him jerk into her harder, the coarse hair at the base of his dick scratched at her clit before he began to grind his hips against her, adding friction like he knew that was what she was searching for with her hips rising to meet him with every thrust.

“But look at how lucky I am. So pretty… Hot little pussy, fuckin’ drenched, baby. How long were thinking about this, hmm?”

Harry did feel lucky too. Y/n was a hot little thing that he’d had some pretty dirty thoughts about since they first hired her. It was his wife’s choice. Y/n was in her senior year of university with long smooth legs and an adorable shy smile that caught him off guard the first time he saw her. So he always looked forward to seeing her every morning before leaving for work, or in the early evenings when he’d come home to relieve her.

Harry grabbed her other hand, moving her arm from her mouth as he brought those fingers up to his lips to kiss every one of them as he threaded their fingers together on her other hand, never stopping the movement of his hips.

With the back of her hand pressed into the blanket next to her shoulder, she inhaled sharply, trying to catch her breath. “Since I first met you…” she admitted.

Harry grunted, running his tongue along her wrist before folding his fingers into hers like her other hand and then pressing it down to the bed as he leaned over her, pelvis grinding against hers, his balls squeezing against her bum. And that was fucking deep.

“Oh yeah? Fuck, coulda been fucking this pretty pussy for the last few months. Making you come for being such a good girl and just for looking so fucking cute all the time.”

She moaned softly, “It feels so good…”

Harry grinned down at her, feeling her start to squeeze and pulse, “It does doesn’t it? Such a bad thing to feel this good. Might be trouble for us.”

“Mmmm…” she panted and then gasped as she was thrown over the edge, walls gripping and milking his cock.

Harry watched Y/n as she fell apart, “There you go, such a good girl, so pretty, baby…”

Harry gritted his teeth as he fucked her through her orgasm.

He was already leaking precome and practically shaking by the time he pulled himself out and pumped his fat cock right over her tummy. He’d have loved to have just come inside Y/n’s pussy but what he was doing was already dumb as it was.

He grunted and sucked in through his teeth, “Oh fuck…”

He’d gotten a little come on his knuckles as he ran his fist down his shaft, letting the last bits drip out onto the girl below him. A pretty sight. She was all fucked out and dazed, tits rising and falling with every breath, his come marking her tummy and her pussy freshly fucked, still soaked.

He was a gentleman, helped her clean up, and kissed her a little bit more before sending her on her way with a playful swat to her ass. He’d have loved to ask her to stay all night but he worried that that would just confuse things further. She promised she wouldn’t tell anyone and Harry said it wouldn’t affect her job and that it would be their secret. Though he did hope he’d have another chance to feel her again one day, he didn’t count on it. His wife was returning the following day and Y/n was soon to finish off her last year of college and she wouldn’t be needing a babysitting gig anymore.

Did he regret cheating on his wife? In that moment, he couldn’t say he did. He had fun and it felt so good to have sex with someone who wanted his cock as bad as Y/n did. He only hoped he didn’t get found out and as long as Y/n kept up her end of the bargain (he was sure she would) he figured the whole thing was a win.

He’d just need to keep himself in check around her when his wife was present. But when his wife wasn’t around he couldn’t promise anything.

. . .

PART 2

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[bbokicidal]

[SKZ] Being their stylist

Could you imagine? God, I'd die.

Notes: I've heard rumor that you've gotta be married to be an idol stylist because,, obviously they don't want dating shit happening but we are DISREGARDING THAT HERE. i couldn't find the recolored vers. of seungmin & innie so... oh well ig. Genre: Fluff Pairing: OT8 x NB!Reader Warnings: Extra fluffy cuteness I guess

Chan:

Sits so patiently and tells you to take your time

You're his favorite stylist. He loves when you're the one who does his makeup so sometimes he requests specifically you

You're just so gentle with him and it feels like he's really being pampered

He loves the way you make his eyes so smokey for stage looks

Keeps his posture good in an effort to impress you

Does that little :] face with his eyes closed because you're just so pleasant to him

Minho:

Falls asleep every time you do his hair

You tell him to keep his head up only to figure out he's sleeping so soundly and you just don't have the heart to wake him when he's on such a tight schedule lately

Jeongin has a LOT of pictures of you bending at funny angles to style Minho's hair while his head is tipped back or to the side

(And one of you pretending to kiss his cheek as he's mid-waking up)

He wakes up feeling so pretty every time you style him

Sleeps with his mouth open like an idiot (me too)

Changbin:

Likes to make you laugh while you style him in outfits

He poses each time you put him in a new jacket and maybe it's just an excuse to flex in front of you oops who said that

He's giggling right alongside you until he accidentally rips a shirt open

The buttons fly right off and he screams, covering his bare chest as you burst into laughter at how silly he sounded and how he scrambled to cover himself up

You get him a new shirt but he's extra careful after that and his ears are beet red

He'll never forgive himself for embarrassing himself in front of you

But he's also an idiot and will forget about it, and probably does it again the next day because he can't help himself

Hyunjin:

Likes to ask what you're doing while you do it

Has not a CLUE what you're talking about when it comes to makeup but listens intently anyways because it's interesting

Any form of art is interesting to him and that includes makeup !

His brows furrow and he nods and he stares at you while you talk which can sometimes be intimidating

Also kind of sucks at sitting through makeup because he's so talkative with the boys

He's also very loud but he tones it down when he talks to you and uses a softer voice with you

Is very happy to listen to you explain makeup to him but also ,,, tell him what contour is again?

Jisung:

He likes to give you complete freedom when it comes to his outfits

Put whatever you want on him; mens, womens, any clothing you think would look good

You were the one who put him in that grey cropped long sleeve a while ago and people went CRAZY so since then he's trusted you with everything

He loves the outfits you make!!

And the ones you wear because he totally checks you out ALL the damn time!!

Sometimes he even asks if he can take pieces home so he can incorporate them into his daily wear and if he does, he tags you in his insta pics - to which you have to tell him 'I didn't make this, tag the brand!!!' and he just laughs

Felix:

Please tell him makeup tips, he's so curious and he wants to start doing his own makeup too

Sometimes he does, for airports and stuff. But that's just a cushion and some powder

Tell him what color eyeshadows look pretty with his eyes, tell him how blush placement changes the shape of his face and the tone of his look

He's going to be asking questions and, if he has access to one, looking at the details up close in a handheld mirror he keeps hold of

It's intimidating to be honest but he's so smiley and chatty with you that your nerves fade away pretty quickly

He also just thinks you're really really gorgeous so he might use it as an excuse to look up at you more. He's examining the makeup you're wearing, that's all !!

Seungmin:

He's got this horrible habit of staring at you through the mirror while you do his hair

He loves the haircut, don't get him wrong, but it looks like he's feeling everything BUT that because of the way he sort of glares

Well - not glares. He just has this RBF that is untouched by anyone else in the world

If you look at him, he looks away and scrolls on his phone, but shortly after he's back to staring

You're just really attractive is all. And he likes your hair, too - so maybe some day he'll take inspiration from that if you allow him

Also the type to fall asleep while you cut his hair because the spray bottle and little scissor cutting sounds are just so soothing

Jeongin:

Is very compliant when you do his makeup

He sits still, he's patient, he only turns his head away when he knows you're changing something up on the table

He keeps his head up and knows when to close his eyes, when to look up, when to part his lips for balm and tint

Very well behaved, one might say

But it's because when you're doing the other's makeup, he's paying close attention. He's always watching you and trying to find ways to impress you without actually making it obvious that that's what he's trying to do

He starts bringing you your favorite snack because he notices it sitting on your makeup table while on tour

He likes to talk to you while you do his makeup but he's a little bit shy about it - he's not openly chatty like Felix or Hyunin

And the day he calls you his favorite stylist you swear your heart almost explodes

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