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dagaelizardz · 6 months ago

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EPIC: The Musical vs The Odyssey: Ruthlessness, Mercy, Grief, and Transformation (and Bards)

In 2019, a college student started writing. It was a small project, a musical. Years later he would say in a Q&A that, “I knew I wanted to write a musical that was large in scale, had many characters, fight scenes, monsters, spells, ships, and larger than life themes (The Michigan Daily).” 5 years later, and that very project, EPIC: The Musical, has reached the end of its first act. The Odyssey is the perfect myth for EPIC to be based on, being the story of a broken middle-aged man trying desperately to reach his home, yearning for his family. On this quest, he is aided and deterred by gods, monsters, and hosts of other mythical beings. This story of hardship and divine intervention fit in perfectly to the story Jay wanted to tell. However, there are still changes that Jay has been making over the course of the story, walking the fine line between keeping it recognizable while shaping it to the story he wants to tell. Jay has taken the basic plot of the Odyssey, shifting it into a story that explores the grey area between ruthlessness and mercy, and if there is a way to use both. This comes to a head in “The Underworld Saga”, where Odysseus sees exactly what each has caused him to lose. It is important to dissect “The Underworld Saga” to see how Jay has adapted The Odyssey into a story about ruthlessness, hubris, and to question if maybe, sometimes, it’s ok to greet the world with open arms.

One of the more controversial changes in “The Underworld Saga”, as opposed to Book XI of The Odyssey, is Polites replacing Elpenor’s spot in it. However, this can barely be called a replacement, as the characters serve unrelated narrative functions, and differing relations to Odysseus in both sources. In the Odyssey, Elpenor dies by falling off the roof of Circe’s home while intoxicated. His body is left crumpled behind the house as Odysseus and the crew are preoccupied by other matters. When Odysseus traverses to the underworld, he is met with the shade of Elpenor who begs for a proper funeral and burial, with a small monument to honor him. He is angry at Odysseus for not mourning him, angry that he hadn’t even realized he died. The scene is heartbreaking, ending with Odysseus promising to do as he is asked before proceeding on to different shades.This is in stark contrast to EPIC, in which Elpenor is not even mentioned by name. During “The Ocean Saga” Elpenor can be heard singing backup, sometimes being a part of the chorus during said Saga. The only allusion to his death is during the first song of “The Underworld Saga”, aptly named “The Underworld”, in which the line “558 men, who died under your command” is sung by the dead crew. This line is more “easter egg” than a real mention. The reason it is a reference to Elpenor is that previously, in the song “Ruthlessness” at the end of Tthe Ocean Saga”, Poseidon sings, “43 left under your command.” This is after he has killed the majority of Odysseus’ fleet, replacing the Laestrygones plot wise. Many fans asked Jay, having taken notice of this, having previously believe that no one had died during “The Circe Saga”. Jay addressed this in a YouTube Short, explaining that this is in reference to Elpenor, and that Jay thought it would be funny if the character who’s entire significance is that Odysseus forgot about him was seemingly forgotten even by the writer, having been forgot by all but his fellow shades.

Even without the forgot Elpenor, there is still a dead crew member from whom Odysseus gets a personal visit in EPIC. This crew member is Polites. In the original Odyssey, Polites is just another crew member. He is only briefly mentioned, being one of the victims of Zeus’s lightning strike much later in the epic. In EPIC however, Polites becomes a vital character, and is boosted to the rank of Odysseus’ best friend. The theme of EPIC, the big moral idea, is a battle between ruthlessness and mercy. Polites exists firmly as the pinnacle of mercy. Previously, during “The Troy Saga”, Polites sings the song “Open Arms,” in which he tells Odysseus about how he should “greet the world with open arms”, so to speak. Odysseus is hesitant, however takes his advice and does not kill the lotus eaters. While this seems to benefit them in the short term, it leads them to the cyclops Polyphemus’s cave, leading to Polyphemus killing several crew members, including the cyclops himself. Odysseus, trying to honor Polites’ memory, does not kill Polyphemus, only blinding him, telling Athena in “Remember Them”, “What good would killing do? When mercy is a skill more of this world could learn to use.” This has a tragic effect however, as sparing Polyphemus’s life invokes the wrath of Poseidon, the father of all cyclopes. Poseidon proceeds to kill all but 43 of Odysseus’ men in a boss battle style fight that was not in The Odyssey, teaching Odysseus the lesson that ruthlessness is the only way to survive. This is all revisited in “The Underworld”, where Odysseus winds up face to face with Polites’ shade, who sings his line from “Open Arms” one last time, “this life is amazing, when we greet it with open arms. Whatever we face, we’ll be fine if we’re leading from the heart! No matter the place, we can light up the world here’s how to start: greet the world with open arms, greet the world with open arms.” This segment is made more poignant when Jay reveals in a YouTube short that much like shades in the original epic lacking many of their original memories until they drink offered blood, the shades in EPIC repeat the last thing they thought before they died. This means that Polites was still so sure of mercy and peace, even as it killed him. is none other than Odysseus’ mother Anticleia, who died while he was gone to war. In both EPIC and the Odyssey, this scene is heartbreaking. In EPIC, she is voiced by Jay’s own mother, providing a heart wrenching display for the audience. As soon as Polites finishes, his mother begins to sing. She sings about how she has been waiting for Odysseus to return home, and how she loves and longs for her son. The pair have a short duet, as Odysseus laments how he has “took too long” and “ventured too far,” with Anticleia telling him how she has been waiting, and that when he gets home, she will be there. This is, of course, not true, as she died before Odysseus managed to enter the underworld. As was mentioned previously about Polites, the same remains true with Anticleia, meaning that she remained waiting hopefully till the very end.

The Odyssey has a much more tragic twist for Odysseus unfortunately. Odysseus first sees his mother after having spoken to Elpenor but must make sure that Tiresias will have enough blood, so he forces himself to ignore her, weeping as he does. When Tiresias has finally finished his prophesy after having drunken most of the blood, Odysseus lets his mother come forth. He tries to embrace her, but due to her ghostly form fails each time. They converse, with Anticleia asking him why he is in the underworld, leading Odysseus to explain his journey to her. He asks about his family, and she details the mourning that his family is going through. After explaining their suffering, she speaks on her own death, saying, “ heaven did not take me swiftly and painlessly in my own house, nor was I attacked by any illness such as those that generally wear people out and kill them, but my longing to know what you were doing and the force of my affection— this it was that was the death of me.” It is generally accepted that she died by hanging herself from the grief. Odysseus is devastated, both at her death and once more at his inability to embrace her. He blames Persephone for making him suffer, but Anticleia corrects him, explaining that all people are like this when dead. While both are incredibly poignant, the time constraints of EPIC being a two-hour musical (as compared to the Odyssey being a musical performance done over the course of what scholars presume was three days) “The Underworld Saga” shows quite clearly the detriment to storytelling that shorter time frames can pose.

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tillidontneedfantasy · 5 years ago

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‘Future Nostalgia’ - Dua Lipa REVIEW: Changing the game through timeless pop.

Pop music is important. It distracts us, it brings us joy, it makes us dance, it attaches itself to memories forever. This is Dua Lipa’s blueprint for her sophomore release, Future Nostalgia. It’s there in the name; she wants her music to be everlasting, so that it can be branded with one of the fondest descriptors possible: nostalgic.

Quite an ambitious objective, but not surprising for 2019′s Best New Artist Grammy winner. There is great pressure that comes with such a title, but Dua has proved herself worthy of it on Future Nostalgia. She does not just want to be the best new artist, but one of the best artists, period. “You want a timeless song, I wanna change the game,” is the opening line of the album and title track. Luckily, we all win in this scenario; although the song itself might not be the game changer, there are plenty of tracks on the album that are game changers because they have a timeless feel to them, which is not something many of her contemporaries are doing.

Future Nostalgia’s only drawback is that there is not much lyrical depth; despite misconception, pop music can explore profundity, especially considering the subject matters of love and heartbreak, which are prominent themes of the album. However, I can accept and respect pop music that operates closer to surface level as well, especially when it’s done as well as it is on Future Nostalgia; I mean, I’m not complaining.

STRONGEST TRACK(S): “Don’t Start Now,” “Pretty Please”

Has there ever been a lead single as strong as “Don’t Start Now”? Co-writers and producers for the track include Ian Kirkpatrick, Emily Warren and Caroline Ailin, all of whom penned her excellent breakout song, “New Rules” (sans Lipa) in 2017. The song is split into three segments- verse, pre-chorus, and chorus- all of which sound distinctly different from the others, yet feel like such a natural equation. The bongos in the chorus and the later addition of a string section over the synths, leading to a full and rich final chorus just throw you for such an exciting loop, it is impossible to not have fun listening to this song. On top of the melodic genius of the song, its straightforward lyrical message is just as empowering as the music itself. “Don’t Start Now” is Dua’s expression of liberation from the pain of a heartbreak, and a warning to the breaker in question not to come crawling back when he sees how much she is thriving, and boy, is she!

Despite the enormous success of both “New Rules” and “Don’t Start Now,” Kirkpatrick and Ailin only work with Dua on one other track of the album, “Pretty Please,” and it should come as a surprise to no one that it is the next strongest song on the record. Penned alongside singer-songwriter phenomenon Julia Michaels and co-produced by Juan Ariza, “Pretty Please,” a track about needing the sweet relief of a lover, is one of the album’s few breathers. And in it, Lipa is asking for a breather herself: “when my mind is running wild, could you help me slow it down?” she asks, and then the song brilliantly does just that when she sings the next line, “put my mind at ease,” before returning to its original speed. There are other great musical tricks sprinkled throughout the song, such as a sound that mimics the feeling of the line “trickle down my spine.” The track continues to build musically but is never too much, it’s always just right.

WEAKEST TRACK: “Boys Will Be Boys”

She tried with this one. She really did. Look, I love a song with a strong feminist message as much as the next girl, but this one was just a swing and a miss. The first verse of “Boys Will Be Boys” starts off strong, quite accurately depicting the fear women face on a daily basis, the way we have to alter our behavior to keep ourselves safe. But with each verse, it feels less sincere and more contrived, with lyrics such as “in case you needed it mansplained” and “if you’re offended by this song, you’re clearly doing something wrong.” Additionally, it is an odd closer for an album full of fun pop songs; it’s possible it is there as a warning for anyone who might get to the end of the album and think negatively of how she asserts her femininity and sexuality in a way throughout that is universally accepted when men do the same. And while the intended message is indeed important and true, it lacks the necessary delivery.

THE IN-BETWEENS

The delivery on the lust-filled, dance-inducing tracks are much more effective. “Cool,” an incredibly infectious song about losing control around the person you’re into, experiments with Dua’s vocal abilities and range, with pointed squeaks at the end of her words and a gorgeous switch into her lower register at the beginning of the final chorus. “Physical,” the second official single, is an intense and wildly fun song that could work as the soundtrack for a long drive, a night at the bar with friends, or in a workout class. While the album very successful achieves sonic cohesion, it can sometimes get a bit tiresome; “Hallucinate” feels like it was made simply to be played at festivals, and although the lyrical sentiment of “Love Again” is nice enough it could have been a moment for a more subtle musical departure.

BEST PROSPECTIVE SINGLE: “Levitating”

Never thought I’d be such a fan of a song that uses the term “sugarboo,” yet, here I am. No track on the record quite captures the concept of “future nostalgia” as well as “Levitating” does, with its futuristic sounds and lyrics that I can imagine we will be singing forever (yes, even the “sugarboo” bit!). In every way, it perfectly encapsulates the pure elation that comes with meeting someone and feeling a heaven-made connection. Every element of this song makes it a necessary single choice: it’s extremely catchy, it has a perfect tempo for anyone of any age to dance to it, “yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!”s, and lyrics in the hook that are perfectly spaced out to remember and chant (”you! moonlight! you’re my! starlight!”). Bruno Mars WISHES he wrote it; it feels like a song for which everyone would get up at a wedding to dance for years and years to come. I, for one, will get up every time, at least.

***

It’s impossible that Dua could have predicted while creating her album that this would be the state of the world at the time of its release. Many artists with new projects have decided to cancel or postpone their releases until further notice due to the COVID-19 pandemic. This is understandable for a myriad of reasons, from the inability to properly promote the work to feeling as if it just might not be the appropriate time. Although it might feel like there is little to dance about right now with the world crumbling around us, Future Nostalgia gives us reason, now and for the future, when we can hopefully look back and remember an album that provided us levity in our darkest hour. So stay indoors, facetime your sugarboo, and thank whatever the hell you pray to for pop music. Grade: 4/5

DISCLAIMER - REVIEWER’S BIAS: I have been a casual fan of Dua since “New Rules” exploded on Tumblr in 2017, but not much more. However, I have a specific fondness for her, as my favorite client of all time was a huge fan of her shortly after, so when I listen to Dua it reminds me of her. I hope she’s loving this album and that it’s bringing her joy and comfort in this uncertain time. I’m a huge proponent for female pop artists and the meticulousness of their craft, and I think Dua has done an excellent job of taking constructive criticism and improving, utilizing her strengths in a way that blur out her weaknesses. The release of “Don’t Start Now” felt like a turning point in her stardom, and this album is the proof. I really would like to see some stronger lyrical work from Dua, as I feel there are little to no moments on the album where I feel impressed or particularly moved by any line, and although I love and support fun and light pop music, I think it’s also very possible to have upbeat pop music with much sharper lyrics. I think she kind of tried but the few times she did they didn’t quite land. If she had a couple of songs stronger on the lyrical front, this would have been a nearly perfect album for me. But for a sophomore effort, this is great. It feels like a nice breath of fresh air in a time that’s filled with anxiety-ridden gasps, and I’m grateful for it.

#dua lipa #future nostalgia #don't start now #cool #physical #levitating #pretty please #hallucinate #love again #break my heart #good in bed #boys will be boys #emily warren #ian kirkpatrick #julia michaels #new rules

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dizzidoom · 5 years ago

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So, I’ve been a little obsessed with animal crossing lately. Who hasn’t, lol. But it got me thinking on how the bey characters would play the game. So here’s a stupid list I made. Enjoy~

Takao/Tyson is time skipping so he can get Drago. He’s also arguing with other bladers who do have him and refusing to give him up. Inviting everyone to his island constantly. He abuses the emote wheel. Max hordes the ugly villagers because he loves them and feels bad that people throw them away. His island is very brightly coloured and full of flowers. Rei/Ray’s island is a perfect zen garden. He traded a cat with Kai for Bianca and spoils her. He just needs to find Rolf and he’ll be perfectly happy. Kai’s island is just cats. He may or may not have actually paid real money to get Raymond. He won’t confirm or deny this rumour. Kenny has it all optimised. He has spreadsheets, island maps, the whole lot. He researched well before the game came out and has barely put it down. He’s even made a website to track turnip prices and such. Daichi is slow with the game. Taking his time, enjoying the relaxing nature of it... for like 15 minutes. Then he gets bored and does something else. He also has a Drago, much to Takao’s utter annoyance (and no. He won’t give the villager up) Hiromi/Hilary’s island is almost perfect. Just a little more landscaping by here, little more flowers there. Wait, no. Flowers would be best over here, that house should be down there. No. No, perhaps over here... Hitoshi/Hiro has no idea what the hype is all about but gets excited when he finds fossils. The owl is his favourite character and when he’s invited to people’s islands he goes to their museum first to see what they have. Yuriy/Tala with his village of wolves. Pristine island where everything has its place. Do not question his choices. Boris/Bryan has a messy island and weird blood splatters all over the place. His animals are barely talked too. He only opens his game up when Yuriy tells him to check his turnip prices for him lol Ivan/Ian likes to ruin other people’s island. He’s been banned from Yuriy’s after the axe incident. Sergei/Spencer doesn’t understand what’s going on but the music is nice and relaxing. He still has only one room in his house but he’s getting there slowly.

Rai/Lee gets a little frustrated with the whole ‘take it slow’ aspect of the game. It’s a little too slow at times for him (no-ones told him about time skipping yet). He also doesn’t like any of the lion villagers and wishes they looked as cool as the tiger ones lol Kiki/Kevin. Monkey island basically. He managed to horde as many monkeys and apes as he could because he has a brand he needs to keep up with. Sometimes joins Ivan in trashing people’s island. Stopped when he received a death threat from Yuriy. Mao/Mariah has the other cat island but there are a tiger or lion in the mix. She’s trying to make it look like her home village too. Getting close. Gao/Gary barely plays it. Mostly only when Mao prompts him to visit her island, or if Kiki makes him play. Micheal is a tarantula/scorpion hunting pro. He gears no hissing bug scuttling after him and has yet to be bitten. He also won’t admit it but the duck villagers are his favourite. (And yes, he has apollo. How could he not?) Emily helps Kenny out with his turnip database website. She also loves the alligator villagers and takes any people don’t want. And yes, she refuses to give up Drago to Takao and refuses to listen to the argument that Drago is a dragon, not an alligator. He’s classed as one online and that's good enough for her. Eddy has several scorpion statues around his island. He’s also tried to make the tallest island but found he can only build so high... So it’s a little difficult to get around his island for newcomers. Steve as you can guess, he’s got quite a few bull villagers. He also loves any jock villagers because they remind him of friends from his football team. And also, maybe a little like the All-Stars at times. Rick doesn’t care but it’s the easiest way to get in touch with Max right now. He refuses to let people visit his island coz it’s a mess, yet is too lazy to actually play the game and make it presentable. Ralf/Robert’s village is incredibly tidy. Like, a little too tidy. Trees are all in order. Flowers cornered off behind fences. The villager houses are all in neat rows. Untrustworthy friends are not allowed to visit lest they ruin his work. Johnny doesn’t give a shit but he really, really loves the bug lizard. So he only plays at night to hunt the tarantulas and scorpions so when Flick visits he can make the lizard super happy. He admits this to no-one. Oliver’s Island is a rose paradise. His little villager is dressed up like a chef most of the time. He also really enjoys the design feature. He finds the limitations a little exciting so can spend hours crafting masterpieces in-game. Giancarlo/Enrique likes to show off for his girlfriends and gift them too many bells and nookmile tickets. He does this to Oliver too, of course. He runs around with the mini crown on his head and loves to emote too much in Johnny’s face. Mariam wants shark villagers but understands it can’t happen. A girl can hope though. Instead, she just has them in tanks around her island and refuses to sell any she fishes up. Ozuma doesn’t care too much for the game. He likes the relaxing nature of it but the way the villager's talk can get on his nerves after an hour. Joseph’s villager has big creepy eyes and he likes to try and sneak on other peoples islands when they least expect it and stalk them. Dunga has an island full of ugly apes and he loves it. He traded for them fairly easily, obviously. Reluctantly gave Kai a cat villager for one too. Salima is really into making her house perfect. Each room has a theme and she’s been on twitter for hours chatting to others and visiting them to share DIY recipes or buy from their shop. Kane is oddly lucky at travelling to the rare mystery islands. Most of his bells are from the bell island if he’s honest. Jim charges a lot of bells or nookmile tickets to visit his island and sell turnips. He’s made more money doing that than actually selling his own turnips. Goki is a little too generous at times and always likes to help out other people. As a result, he’s not really managed to upgrade much on his island yet, but he’s getting there. Zeo doesn’t want to talk about Ribbot and Sprocket, and no you can’t have them, they like his island very much thank you. Queen and King cheat together. They go to people’s islands and scam them. Offering items for bells but quickly taking both when the items are dropped. Many of the other bladers now refuse to let them visit. Raul likes the horse villagers best but has only got one. He’s forever on the lookout for them. He is also afraid of the tarantula’s and is constantly being bitten by them. Julia is far more interested in making interesting clothes. She’s made nearly everything she’s owns so her in-game villager can match her all the time. Mathilda is constantly catching the butterflies. She can’t get the hang of fishing but her insectopedia thingie is full for all the bugs she can get. She adores the Able sisters. Claude spends all his money buying stupid clothes for his villagers to wear. After seeing Giancarlo’s crown though he plans to buy one for each villager. If only he had the savings... Miguel’s island is like a beach resort. He also takes a lot of in-game selfies or stupid screencaps and posts them on twitter. Aaron loves fishing a lot. Like, a lot a lot. He has a room full of each fish he can get so Mathilda can take them one day to fill up her museum since she’s so crap at fishing. Garland doesn’t care too much about the game. He plays a little each day, does the daily chores he needs to do and then stops. He does love to visit people and interact though. Will spend hours island hopping. Went to Yuriy’s island once and spent ten minutes getting smacked in the face with a net. He never went back. He hopes it was therapeutic for the Russian though. Ming-Ming owns nearly all the clothes. She has her team send screenshots every day of what is in their clothes shops so she can buy anything she doesn’t own yet. She may, or may not be a little obsessed with the animals singing too. Brooklyn refuses to weed and refuses to cut trees. He’ll hit them for wood, but if a tree grows it stays there forever. As you can imagine, it’s like a forest and hard to navigate. Except for Brooklyn. He knows his way. Mystel’s island is full of fruit. Like, it’s just fruit trees because he wants to always have some to give to visitors. There are also many rivers because who doesn’t like using the pole all the time? Moses/Crusher plays with his sister. He’s also currently being guilt-tripped by Takao to give up a Drago. But Drago really likes his island so how can he send the alligator away?

#beyblade #headcanon #I tried to use english dub names and the originals #but I only really know a few of the originals off the top of my head #so forgive if Ive missed anyone <3

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thecoleopterawithana · 5 years ago

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Did I Ever Take You In My Arms

[Another instalment in the ‘Touching Is Good’ series, following themes previously explored in ‘I Want To Hold Your Hand’.]

The gesture of holding someone or being held in their arms is one of the best-known forms of physical affection. It is no wonder then that the concept makes frequent appearances in romantic songs, including the ones where our young Beatles express their idea of being loved:

Hold me tight Tell me I'm the only one And then I might Never be the lonely one So hold (hold) me tight (me tight) Tonight (tonight), tonight (tonight) It's you, you you you

And if Paul was asking for cuddles in 1961, by February 1963 both John and Paul were offering them, in one of those back-of-the-bus, truly conjoined writing sessions.

I've got arms that long to hold you And keep you by my side I've got lips that long to kiss you And keep you satisfied

So, I think we’ve established “holding” as one of their idyllic expressions of love. And if John seemed to establish “holding hands” as a shorthand phrase for his desires of physical affection, the next step to a proper full-on hug came to be invaluable in the communication of what they couldn’t say in words:

To Taylor's dismay, the three Beatles greeted them with hugs and kisses. "This is the new thing!" Lennon told him. "You hug your friends when you meet them and show them you’re glad to see them. Don’t stand there shaking hands as if everyone’s got some disease! Get close to people!"

— John Lennon, picking up Derek and Joan Taylor at the airport, 28 May 1967. In Joe Goodden’s Riding So High: The Beatles and Drugs (2017).

John dives deeper into the subject some months later, in a heart-wrenchingly raw examination of his feelings of depersonalization, of becoming adrift “alone on a draft in the middle of the universe”, and how contact (and of the physical kind) with the other Beatles – specifically Paul – helps anchor him to reality:

If I am on my own for three days, doing nothing, I almost completely leave myself. I’m at the back of my head. I can see my hands and realize they’re moving, but it’s like a robot who’s doing it. I have to see the others to see myself. Then I realize there is someone like me so it’s reassuring. We were recording the other night, and I just wasn’t there. Neither was Paul. We were like two robots going through the motions. We do need each other a lot. When we used to get together after a month off, we used to be embarrassed about touching each other. We’d do an elaborate handshake just to hide the embarrassment… or we did mad dances. Then we got to hugging each other. Now we do the Buddhist bit… arms around. It’s just saying hello, that’s all.

— John Lennon, interview with Hunter Davies (late 1967).

The “Buddhist bit” refers to the practice of “hugging meditation”, as observed by @monkberries in this post.

Introduced by Zen Buddhist monk and peace activist Thich Nhat Hanh in the late 60′s, it rose out of the need to adapt his teachings – mutual understanding as the way to spiritual intimacy – to the body language of the West, as he recounts in his book How To Love (2014):

In 1966, a friend took me to the Atlanta Airport. When we were saying good-bye she asked, “Is it all right to hug a Buddhist monk?” In my country, we’re not used to expressing ourselves that way, but I thought, “I’m a Zen teacher. It should be no problem for me to do that.” So I said, “Why not?” and she hugged me, but I was quite stiff. While on the plane, I decided that if I wanted to work with friends in the West, I would have to learn the culture of the West.

At the core of the practice is the very conscious choice to be aware of the presence of this other human being in your arms, and just how they make you feel. Necessarily, it involves a shedding of the usual “Northern men” hang-ups, in order to enter a state of true communicative openness and emotional honesty.

According to the practice, you have to really hug the person you are holding. You have to make him or her very real in your arms, not just for the sake of appearances, patting him on the back to pretend you are there, but breathing consciously and hugging with all your body, spirit, and heart. Hugging meditation is a practice of mindfulness. “Breathing in, I know my dear one is in my arms, alive. Breathing out, she is so precious to me.” If you breathe deeply like that, holding the person you love, the energy of your care and appreciation will penetrate into that person and she will be nourished and bloom like a flower.

And this phrasing made me wonder if John started to pick up on his idea that “Love is a flower and you have to water it” even back then.

Thich Nhat Hanh goes on to explain the specific procedures of the practice and the philosophy behind it:

Hugging is a deep practice; you need to be totally present to do it correctly. When I drink a glass of water, I invest one hundred percent of myself in drinking it. You can train yourself to live every moment of your daily life like that.

Before hugging, stand facing each other as you follow your breathing and establish your true presence. Then open your arms and hug your loved one. During the first in-breath and out-breath, become aware that you and your beloved are both alive; with the second in-breath and out-breath, think of where you will both be three hundred years from now; and with the third in-breath and out-breath, be aware of how precious it is that you are both still alive.

When you hug this way, the other person becomes real and alive. You don’t need to wait until one of you is ready to depart for a trip; you may hug right now and receive the warmth and stability of your friend in the present moment. (...)

When we hug, our hearts connect and we know that we are not separate beings. Hugging with mindfulness and concentration can bring reconciliation, healing, understanding, and much happiness.

We can see how this technique might have been crucial in helping John come down and become aware not only of others but especially of himself; how it helped him heal and become more confident than usual in the notion that he is indeed loved and not alone.

For Paul, it was perhaps a difficult, but nonetheless essential exercise in emotional frankness and vulnerability, where he really had to come to terms with his own feelings, and more importantly, open up his heart enough to accept that same love back.

But the perfectly in tune state of ‘67 would soon be disrupted (sadly, but not surprisingly) by a breakdown in communication.

On the advantages of the new “boat”, John had this to say:

It’s a plus, it’s not a minus. The plus is that your best friend, also, can hold you without… I mean, I’m not a homosexual, or we could have had a homosexual relationship and maybe that would have satisfied it, with working with other male artists.

— John Lennon, interview with Sandra Shevey (June, 1972).

So it appears that at some point, John’s need for physical intimacy had been left unsatisfied (due to internal or external pressures remains to be known).

Though earlier, on March of that same year, Paul had made a cover of Gerald H. Nelson and Fred B. Burch’s song “Tragedy”, popularized Thomas Wayne and the DeLons in 1959. It ended up not being included in Wings’ Red Rose Speedway (1973), but the chorus goes as follows:

Oh, come back Have me here Hold me, love Be sincere You've gone from me, oh, oh, tragedy

What did come out on Red Rose Speedway was a second “Hold Me Tight”:

I've waited all my life for you Hold me tight Take care of me and I'll be right Hold me tight, hold me tight Hold me tight, hugga me right Hold me tight, squeeza me tight Hold me tight, hugga me right Hold me tight, Hold me tight, Hold me tight

Eventually, when re-approaches were made, John and Paul would take up hugging again as a show of affection.

When I opened the outer door, I saw it was actually Paul and Linda. They’d been singing "We Wish You A Merry Christmas.” I was really surprised and said, “I think you’re looking for the guys in the bedroom.” As they came in, everyone was really happy to see each other. John and Yoko jumped up when Paul and Linda walked into the bedroom. They were obviously excited to see each other again. There was a lot of hugging and catching up, and we had a round of tea.

— Bob Gruen, John Lennon: The New York Years

They [John and Paul] seemed like giddy school chums. Hugging, patting each other on the back… like high-school buddies who hadn’t seen each other for a long time and really liked each other.”

— Bob Gruen, on the Christmas meeting between the Lennons and the McCartneys (December 1975).

But there was still an ocean between them, and sometime in 1976, John seemed to be in an especially wistful mood, as he sang on a demo of “Real Life”:

Was I just dreaming or was it only Yesterday

I used to hold you in my arms

And now a baby, and a another on the way

[Indescernable] in a farm

Now must we be alone?

If it don’t feel right, don’t do it

If it don’t look right, look right through it

If it don’t feel right, don’t do it

Just call him on the phone

But in the end, just when tentative steps where being taken for there to be more open communication again, the possibilities were ripped from their arms:

If I had known John was going to die, I would have made a lot more effort to try and get a better relationship with him. But when he started slagging me off I was not prepared to say ‘Well, you’re quite right’, because I’m human. My big regret was that I could have told John to listen and put my arms round him.”

— Paul McCartney, interview for the Titbits Magazine (November 1983).

This and other regrets Paul explores in the beautiful song “This One” (first demo recorded on 29 December 1986), where he deals with his past reticence to more clearly demonstrate his love:

Did I ever take you in my arms, Look you in the eye, tell you that I do, Did I ever open up my heart And let you look inside.

...

Did I ever touch you on the cheek Say that you were mine, thank you for the smile, Did I ever knock upon your door And try to get inside?

...

What opportunities did we allow to flow by Feeling like like the timing wasn't quite right? What kind of magic might have worked if we had stayed calm, Couldn't I have given you a better life?

Did you ever take me in your arms, Look me in the eye, tell me that you do? Did I ever open up my heart, Let you look inside?

If I never did it, I was only waiting For a better moment that didn't come. There never could be a better moment Than this one, this one.

Paul would go on to continue using the promise of hugging and physical affection as a demonstration of love in his music, as heard in the chorus of Flaming Pie’s (1997) “Calico Skies” (written in August 1991):

I will hold you for as long as you like I'll hold you for the rest of my life

Overall, this lesson in bodily affection as a clear expression of your love is one Paul would indeed treasure for the rest of his life, as he fondly recollects:

You remember little things about people. I remember sort of seeing [John] and he comes in and gives me a hug and says 'Touching is good.' I'll never forget that. Touching is good. So I do a lot of hugging now.

— Paul McCartney, interview with Jim Axelrod for CBS News (17 September 2005).

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funknrolll · 5 years ago

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Celebrating Prince: discovering a timeless artist and his meaningful and impactful art. Part 4. The Truth, The Vault.. Old Friends 4 Sale and Rave Un2 The Joy Fantastic eras.

Hi music lovers, as I anticipated on monday, music addiction is going to celebrate Prince and his amazing and timeless work!! The article will be split into a few little articles. I hope you enjoy this new format and these articles!!

As I said yesterday, let me say that I have heard so many things about Prince’s artistry. Some comments came from uneducated people who did not even take a second of their lives to understand, and do research on his art. Hence, I think the time to shed some light on Prince’s art, has come (finally). I hope to help some of those people understand this artist better and to finally appreciate him the way he deserves. We owe Prince big time. Today’s music and musicians owe Prince everything. Without him, many of the artists we listen to today, WOULD NOT BE EXISTING. As we all know, Prince loved to experiment with music, trying out new music genres, new styles, new harmonies, melodies, rhythms and so on. This is one of the factors that led this legend to create a unique, wide and broad vault. There are so many songs of his that I love so much and that I find relevant for this article. The ones I chose, are going to prove that Prince and his music did not just revolve around sex and sexuality, (even if the artist through his music took the topic to another whole level). Through the article, we will see that Prince was more than all that I mentioned above. He was an extraordinary human being, blessed with so many enormous talents, with a beautiful mind, a uniquely pure soul. A true gift of God. With this in mind, let us start this article.

The other three part of the article are already out on this blog, so check them out if you’d like✨

In 1998 Prince released 2 albums: Crystal ball and the Truth. The most relevant is, however, the Truth which was conceived as an acoustic album even though it contains some electronic sounds such as distortions, electronic instruments, sounds effects. Despite that, Prince focused on giving the album an acoustic sound. With these new, the almost minimalistic acoustic sounds emotional lyrics addressing political issues, animal exploitation, and the loss of a loved one, the artist unravels his most private and delicate side. Some of the songs I loved the most are The Truth, The Animal Kingdom, and Comeback. The 21 century was going to be the era of fake news and as I mentioned the artist was also predicting the era of fake news. Related to this topic these lies express how fake news can create an increase in people’s fear of death. Indeed, looking at the lyrics:

What if half the things ever said

Turned out 2 be a lie

How will U know the Truth?

From the beginning of the song, he is educating the listener about the lies we are told daily and the fake news we hear daily.

What If time's only reason?

Was to give us all somethin' 2 fear?

And if so y'all, the end of the journey's so clear

These lines address the issue of how the lies create the fear of death.

If there was just one day

That everybody tell the truth

We'd all trade bank accounts & move to back to Neptune

The song closes with the artist envisioning a world without fake news and with no lies. What I find extremely relevant is the contrast between Prince’s performance and the sound of the guitar which is even more remarked while Prince chose to perform most of the song in a light head voice. What I also find remarkable is the use of electronic sounds such as the ticking of the clock right before singing the line” What if time is the only reason”

Another song that I particularly love is The Animal Kingdom. Prince addressed the issue of animal cruelty. He also gives the listener clues about him being vegan. As the lyrics are quite straightforward, there is no need for a further explanation, however, what makes the song unique is its instrumental as this album is characterized by an acoustic sound. Indeed, the artist used a wide dose of electronic sounds and he distorted his voice as well. I also noticed an exceedingly clever use of sounds effects such as animal sounds.

The third song I mentioned is the Comeback which is extremely personal, deep, and emotional. It gets straight to the heart. This song is about losing someone dear and as in 1996 Prince lost his first and only child, I would assume that this song was how the artist was dealing with this heartbreak unfortunate event he experienced. He then crafted a sophisticated but yet simple instrumental entirely played with an acoustic guitar to which he added some of the most BEAUTIFUL AND TOUCHING lyrics to ever be written. Personally, as I have just lost my grandfather and my grandmother as well, I feel this song extremely close to my heart, Prince with these words and his beautiful performance had been able to touch my heart in such a way that only true artist with an ENORMOUS sensitivity could do. Moreover, taking a look at the lyrics:

Walking up the stairs

Just the afternoon

Sweet wind blew

Not a moment 2 soon

(Hoo) I cry when I realized

That sweet wind was USpirits come and spirits go

Some stick around 4 the aftershow

Don't have 2 say I miss U (don't have 2 say I miss U)

Cause I think U already know

If U ever lose someone

Dear 2 U

Never say the words they’re gone

They'll come back, yeah

They'll come back, yeah yeah

They'll come back

Tears go here

The song lasts only 1 minute and 59 seconds, and it consists of a few lines. However, with these few yet powerful words, the artist has been able to communicate one of the worst experiences he could possibly go through. What left me so mesmerized about this gem is how Prince could tell and perform this heartbreaking story with such a beautiful and unarming gentleness that only he could do. Moreover, the Artist opted for an acoustic album to craft this masterpiece, which is in perfect harmony with the main theme of this song.

In 1999 the Artist released his last album with Warner Bros, The Vault. This work features unreleased materials. In my opinion, there are 2 relevant songs on this album which are There is Lonely and Old Friends 4 Sale.

The blues ballad There is Lonely is characterized by some straightforward used to express Prince’s pain caused by a deep sense of loneliness.

Is it me or did the room just get darker?

Is it me or did I just lay down and die?

Is this a dream or did the world just crumble at my very feet?

How in heaven will I ever be alright? here is lonely and there is lonely

And then there is how I feel right now

Perhaps only Cain when he'd slain his brother

Could ever come close to knowing how...yeahThere is lonely and there is lonely

And then there is how I feel right now

Perhaps only Cain when he'd slain his brother

Could ever come close to knowing how there is lonely and there is lonely

And then there is how I feel right now

The short yet impressive and effective lyric is a poignant rant where the Artist with some heartbreaking metaphors conveyed to the listener what he was feeling. Additionally, as we can see from the lyrics, Prince is comparing loneliness to darkness and to death which is complementary. Moreover, loneliness is also compared to the world crumbling at the artist’s feet. The artist depicted the feeling of loneliness as something so overwhelming that he was not sure he would have ever been all right again. The heartbreak led the Artist to feel like nobody could ever understand how he felt. Additionally, Prince used another relevant metaphor which involves Cain and Abel, the two biblical from the book of genesis. As I mentioned, the music genre opted is blues and suites perfectly the general topic of this masterpiece, enhancing the sorrow and the pain the artist felt. Prince’s performance is another poignant yet interesting characteristic. The artist sang these words with a beautiful soft voice he was almost whispering, perhaps he opted for this beautiful and sophisticated performance because sometimes if we want to be heard we must learn to whisper. This, indeed, makes this masterpiece even more effective because we can really feel the sorrow and the exhaustion the artist was feeling.

The second song I mentioned is Old Friends 4 Sale. This might look like a sad love-story but it is not. It is indeed a song about betrayal and being backstabbed by someone the artist trusted. Indeed, this masterpiece was written out of rage. The song is about Jimmi Jam and Terry Lewis respectively the Time’s keyboardist and bassist. According to the book, Prince and the Purple Rain Era Studio Sessions 1983 and 1984, by Duane Tudahl, recounts the fateful day of March 24, 1983. The Time was due on stage in San Antonio that evening to open for Prince. Jam and Lewis were in Atlanta, producing sessions for the SOS Band. “We get to the airport, and it starts snowing”, said Jam in an interview recalling the half-inch that shut down the airport. They missed the gig and were later fired from the band. But unlike the dozens of talented musicians that would come and go from Prince’s orbit in the years ahead, Jam and Lewis were different – they were like family. Moreover, Prince already warned the Time not to produce music with other bands, to prevent his friends from giving away the signature sound that made them so special. Despite Prince’s warning them, Jimmy and Terry did not listen. However, Prince was not the one who decided to fire Jam and Lewis. Indeed as Prince said in a 1990 follow-up Rolling Stone interview with Karlen, "I'm playing the bad guy," says Prince, "but I didn't fire Jimmy and Terry. Morris asked me what I would do in his situation. You got to remember, it was his band." Besides all of that, what I find impressive is the orchestral arrangement of this song. Prince opted for another blues song which suits extremely well the general meaning of this masterpiece. Moreover, the beautiful, sophisticated, complex arrangement of the song was crafted by Clare Fischer. The song presents an exceedingly wide variety of musical instruments and a mesmerizingly broad spectrum of harmonies.

The following album is Rave In2 the Joy Fantastic released in 1999. Among the songs that I prefer in this masterpiece, there are Eye Love You but I don’t trust you anymore, Man ‘O’ War and Whatever U go Whatever U do. With this album, the Artist is letting the listener catch a glimpse of how and why his relationship with his former wife Mayte Garcia, was ending. Moreover, Prince was in constant evolution artistically and musically and this album is the proof of it. Indeed, the sounds of this album are extremely different from the previous ones he released. Eye Love You But I Don’t Trust You Anymore is one of the most intimate, personal and heartbreaking songs the artist had ever written. The simple and neat arrangement was crafted for voice, piano, and guitar. The lyrics of this masterpiece are also quite straight-forward.

I could tell from the moment you walked in the room

That it wasn't your dress you had on, that wasn't your perfume

And what happened to the ring that I gave you?

What am I to assume? I love u, but I just don't trust u anymore You could tell f

rom the moment you looked in my eyes

That I could see right through you, you must apologize

I've always given you the best in life

Even in the wrong, it was right

I know you trust me, but you don't love me anymore, I remember meeting you here in the good old days

I would never pick the flower of my favorite protege

Maybe if I would have

Then you would not treat me this way

You tricked me but you will not anymore, no, I love u, but I don't trust u anymore

According to what these lines are inferring, the artist was cheated on by his partner which led to a widespread belief that the person he was singing about was his former wife Mayte Garcia. Indeed, Prince says he did not recognize his wife and her perfume and that she took off the ring he gave her. Moreover, in the last verses, Prince is claiming to be the one who was cheated on as he sings “ I would never pick the flower of my favorite protege/ Maybe if I would have/ Then you would not treat me this way/ You tricked me but you will not anymore”. As I said, the song seems to suggest that Prince was cheated on, and being wronged by an unfaithful spouse was fairly new territory for the artist’s lyrical repertoire. Moreover, as regards the arrangement, it is extremely simple and intimate as it is made of a piano and an acoustic guitar, courtesy of the indie rock artist Ani DiFranco. Moreover, this is one of the most nakedly emotional songs by the musical genius. This emotivity is so hearable in Prince’s voice and it is indeed super clear that he was hurt and wounded. As regards the lyrics the message Prince is delivering is extremely powerful and the pain and sense of betrayal are totally feelable. However, these lyrics were performed in such a gentle and delicate way which made the message delivered even more poignant. Moreover, Prince might have opted for spare but yet sophisticated lyrics so the beautiful vocals and the lyrics could be brought to the forefront and hence the listener could put all his attention to them. This is in my opinion on of the most beautiful and heart-wrenching songs that the artist has ever done. Furthermore, the second song I mentioned is Man ‘O’ War. Allegedly, this is another song where the Artist expressed his anger and pain for what he endured when his relationship was dissolving. Indeed, as in Eye Love You But I Don't Trust You Anymore, the lyrics are extremely clear. In fact, from this song, the listener can expect to hear the story of a man who was tired of being in an unpeaceful relationship. From the lyrics, it becomes evident how hurt Prince was to the point that he felt like he was robbed of his dignity. On the other hand, he wanted to have the peace of mind and how he wanted to be loved and wanted again. However, this could not happen with the person he was talking about because as the Artist said “ But lovin' you, lovin' you, lovin' you is a waste of time”, therefore with the” 7-page letter” the artist mentions (perhaps hinting to the divorce papers), the marriage between the couple was just meant to dissolve. As regards the arrangements, Prince chose a slow and extremely intense r&b song that suits the lyrics perfectly. Furthermore, on a more positive note, the third song I mentioned is Wherever U go, Whatever you do. Through some forthright lyrics, the artist delivers an extremely uplifting and motivating message. With these words inspiring words the artist, encouraging each of us to be positive and smile and to pursue our dreams and always try our best no matter what. Another lesson we can learn from Prince is to learn from every situation, good or bad, and that even if we fail sometimes, it is ok as long as we tried our best. This is one of the most heartwarming, most powerful, and biggest lessons that Prince has taught us and that he had lived his entire life up to. As regards the performance, the Artist uses such a beautiful, gentle, and delicate head voice and I honestly can feel all the love and the positivity he was putting into this masterpiece. I think also that the lyrics are so BEAUTIFUL that, I need to report them here.

Wherever U Go, Whatever U do

Oh please, remember that I'll always be there 4 U

U don't have 2 call, U don't have 2 say

Just think about me and I'll be on my way

I don't have 2 worry, I'm sure U'll be fine

Cuz if U stay happy, then what's yours is mine

Wherever U Go, Whatever U do

Remember that I'll always be there 4 U

(Oh Baby)

Wherever U R, think of your dreams

Oh please, remember life ain't always what it seems

4 each rainy day (rainy day)

That comes your way

The sun will come shining and U'll be okay

Keep on smiling - every girl and boy

Remember when U were children U had toys

Wherever U R, think of your dreams

Remember that dreams become the life U lead

Whatever U play, it's okay 2 lose

Ooh sometimes (sometimes...)

As long as U learn from every game U choose

If one thing is sure, U'll always endure

If U try your best at everything U do

Say what U mean and mean what U say

The price 4 a broken heart - it's 2 much 2 pay

And nothing is worth it if U don't have 2 try

The higher the stakes - the higher the sky

Wherever U Go, whatever U do

Please remember

Remember that I'll always be there 4 U

If you guys would like to purchase your copy of the albums I wrote about in this article (which I recommend, PLEASE DO NOT BOOTLEG PRINCE’S MUSIC), I’ll post the links below✨

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07G4RBKVX/ref=as_sl_pc_tf_til?tag=giuliabianchi-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=83159c110419ccae1e65f81e748becc1&creativeASIN=B07G4RBKVX

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B002C7C25K/ref=as_sl_pc_tf_til?tag=giuliabianchi-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=ef3f50f598a5d101ef449e332467257c&creativeASIN=B002C7C25K

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07NHR5XWZ/ref=as_sl_pc_tf_til?tag=giuliabianchi-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=e1e74ca6b12fa9f07c1d18d6086f8377&creativeASIN=B07NHR5XWZ

This was the 4th part of a series of articles dedicated to Prince to celebrate his life and most importantly his art. Stay tuned for more. If you have missed the first part feel free to check it out✨ In the meantime stay home, stay safe and healthy. Peace and Love 4 one another. thank you so much for your attention 💜 G 💜

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justhereforseverus · 4 years ago

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A rose by any other name would smell as sweet

Chapter 3: If Music be the Food of Love Play on

The next day I agreed to have lunch with Remus after a rather wild literature class discussing Jane Eyre’s parallels to witches in the muggle world. He always looked a bit worn down but that is more due to his werewolf condition. Thankfully Dumbledore supports him unconditionally and defended him eagerly against any Slytherin parents wanting to leave his teaching position. Although, most of the students love him, and I can see why. He is very down-to-earth and doesn’t judge based on appearance, house or gender. He is the teacher that knows when something is wrong and tries to help you. A sweetheart really. Yet, I know he doesn’t have it easy and the daily bickering of rich parents and the Slytherin house take its toll. I trusted him from the first moment I met him and I appreciate his openness and general chill attitude. I told him about the events of yesterday and mentioned my rather unusual encounter with Severus. He almost spit out his tea – “Wow, ok. I’d never expected him to voluntarily watch the stars with someone. That sounds so romantic™ – here he jokingly slurred his language and pretended to flirt with me - I mean, I’ve known him for so long and our relationship is certainly…. complicated. Nevertheless, that is one side I’ve never seen nor expected of him. Who would’ve thought our little dungeon bat would sit on a bench with a woman while longingly looking at the stars. Maybe he’s gone soft over the years.” – he told me. I asked him what he meant: “Well, you see. He is very hard-working, focused.. always soooo focused on anything he does. A perfectionist quiet often. I respect him for that despite our history and, frankly, hatred for each other. But he never seemed to have time for such things that are outside his work, or anything really that makes life enjoyable. Little things that make people normal. “– here he paused and played a bit with his fork in the food. “On the other side, he could hide it very well. He was always a very buttoned-up person but that’s understandable with his past. I don’t think anyone actually knows him these days apart from Dumbledore maybe.” Here we both paused a bit in reflection. He might be right. I don’t know anything about him. After the first meetings, I also never thought we would have much contact with each other, apart from great feasts and faculty meetings. It’s certainly strange.

After seeing a poster on the wall, I thought of something: “To change the topic a bit – are you going to the concert, today, Remus?” He sighed and said: “Do we really have a choice? I think all teachers have to be present because who else should listen to 2 hours of choral songs” – he winked and continued: “I mean, our choir is not bad per se but I have heard their rehearsals next door for weeks now and I’m not sure it’s going to be headache-free. Their last concert was also disastrous.” I commented: “Oh, come on. Now you’re just mean. Is that appropriate for the most popular teacher at Hogwarts?” – He replied: “Oh, stop it! My preference for music sung in tune won’t endanger my position. But I could use some new competition for a change.” Of course, my answer was: “Challenge accepted!”

Later I arrived in the Great Hall, which has been transformed into a very fancy concert hall with red-velvet seats and a stage fit for the best choir in the whole country. Indeed, most of the teachers have already taken their seats near the front stage. Some were standing around talking to students and colleagues. Though the concert is not mandatory to attend for students most of them welcomed the change of pace. In contrast to literature and theatre, music has its place in the wizarding world starting from the rather cringy school themes to the holistic themes of the Merlin symphony. Music is a tool for concentration and bonding – thus it serves a clear purpose for the wizards and witches. After having a look at the stage, Minerva offered me a seat next to her “Come on, dear. Nice to see you. I hope you enjoy your first concert at Hogwarts. I swear it’s tolerable most of the time.” I smiled, thanked her and sat down. After some minutes of conversation about tea, the latest edition of the magazine “Baking magical sweets for any occasion” and the last transformation exam, the choir took its place on the stage. While they were still shuffling with their sheet notes, I suddenly felt a person taking a seat next to me. I thought it might have been Remus as he still was deep in conversation with Flitwick when I arrived. To my surprise though, it was Severus. He nodded at me and let out a silent hello, as the choir started to sing. I did the same but then focused on whatever was going on in front of me. It flattered me but still I felt unsure. I looked around to see if there were any other seats available and yes, indeed they are many available to choose from. Thus, he didn’t have to sit next to me, but it might have been an active choice. Though, I know that he often sits next to Minerva. Somehow, they both seem to get along well despite their differences and the constant rivalry of their houses. But I don’t think that this was the main reason. Or am I reading too much into this? Oh, gosh, yes, I AM reading too much into this. Yes, absolutely. It’s a perfectly normal action, sitting next to colleagues. Also why do I care? Why do I care that he is so close to me again? Why am I feeling his body next to me despite not touching? What is wrong with me? Ok, back to the concert. Calm down.

I was pleasantly surprised as, apart from one or two wrongly sung notes, the songs have been performed well. One second year Hufflepuff also performed a smashing solo and was applauded for many minutes afterwards. Afterwards, Minerva said to me “Well, that was way better than last year’s performance. They have improved tremendously! You should have been there back then. I’ve never heard such mutilation of beautiful songs before. It was very entertaining though. We poked fun at Flitwick for a month. We might have overdone it a bit though…” . I agreed. I enjoyed it much despite the distraction in form of a tall man dressed in black next to me. I looked to my side and Severus had already stood up and made his way out of the hall. Pity, I’d love to hear his opinion on the performance. That reminds me. He still owes me a potion.

#pro snape #snape appreciation month #severus snape #snape x reader #snape x female reader #snape x oc #fanfiction

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graciehart · 5 years ago

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Lover track by track

SO. I’m currently out of the country and it took me awhile to finish this, but I’m sharing my thoughts for anyone who cares to read it. There’s SO much more to say and I wish it was better written because I like when words are nice and convey exactly what you want to say (I’m doing this all on my phone) but you get the general feel and that’s what’s important, the emotions. Come talk to me if you want!!!!

I tried to put a read more but I’m not sure if I can on mobile? Because mobile is its own special nightmare so I’m soRRY

I Forgot That You Existed | The way this song starts (and the whole thing) reminds me a lot of a Lauv song. Something about it just does. It’s a wonderful start to the album, I think, because it IS her moving on, but it isn’t yet the level of “step into the daylight and let it go.” It’s the first step; it’s realizing that not everyone deserves a place in your life, but closer to Reputation than other songs on the album (like the “so... yeah” which I LOVE but, I think, has a slightly different attitude than she ends with). I love her delivery of different lines in this song; you can hear the freedom in her comments, giggles, and speaking.

Cruel Summer | I saw a post that said fans of “Getaway Car” would like this one and I GET IT now. It’s inexplicably tied to that song in my mind, something about the production and melody and everything, even the ending on the third beat. And I love it. One thing I’ve missed about pre-1989 is her lyrics; not to say any album of hers doesn’t have insanely clever and meaningful lyrics (because they all do), but I think there is just something so incredible about her Speak Now and Red lyrics especially. It’s part of why pop music in general isn’t my main genre. But this early on and I knew Lover was everything I have ever wanted in a pop album. “Taylor Swift” is its own genre, and will always be my favorite genre, but this song just... so perfectly marries her older songwriting with her newer song production. Her voice when she calls him a devil oh my that was god tier I swear—and lines like “devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes” and “in these trying times we’re not trying” are so clever and akdjslsjsk I love Taylor Alison Swift.

Lover | She mentioned that the album was almost called Daylight and even though I might’ve preferred that (lover is still not my favorite word), I’m so happy that “Lover” is the, as she calls it, flagship song. There is a palpable warmth and security in the tone of the song, and you can hear her smile as she sings. She is in love—a real, steadfast, quiet love. A love that isn’t composed of extraordinary moments that her younger self fantasized about in songs, but of little details and daily routines and the way love’s presence pervades every aspect of life.

The Man | Ugh she IS a fearless leader, she IS the alpha type—to write a song with as much BDE as this you have to be. She is the shit and she knows it, and I love the lyrics and vocabulary of the song! Like how she talks about being able to separate behavior from ideas and accomplishments or actions from character—it’s such a difficult thing to really work into a song as seamlessly as she does. Also, THE BRIDGE. Holy moly. I think it’s one of my favorite bridges on the album. I had no idea how badly I needed to hear her say “bitch” like this. I love her.

The Archer | I SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME! I SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME!!!! Also, the transition into “you could stay...” is just so beautiful. And I think it’s such an interesting choice that she doesn’t end it there, that she goes back to combat. It echoes what she says in “I Forgot That You Existed,” that she would’ve fought the whole town for them. She’s opening herself up to someone new and asking them to stay, but saying that if they do, she’s ready to fight for this love.

I Think He Knows | “Boy, I understand.” That’s it that’s the whole tweet. (Not). But also the snaps and “we can follow the sparks, I’ll drive” is just ?!?!!! Mind blowing. She’s incredible.

Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince | Okay... this was the most unexpected love for me, even though I know titles don’t mean anything, I was so surprised how much I love this one. I love the “okay!” and the way she yells different words, it really echoes the sounds of a high school sports game and that’s just so smart because that’s the theme of this song. I don’t know it’s just SO GOOD. And there are some really heartbreaking lyrics (“you are the only one who seems to care,” “no cameras catch my pageant smile/muffled cries”) where you just get this sense of loneliness and fear and in its own way it reminds me of “Safe and Sound,” when she says “don’t you dare look out your window.” The five of this song feels like her holding her lover’s hand and running behind him with their heads down through the storm of a high school hallways—“now the storm is coming but it’s you and me, that’s my whole world.”

Paper Rings | For whatever reason, this song gives me major “The Middle” vibes. I saw someone say that it’s “‘Stay Stay Stay’ 2.0” and it makes it even more adorable because then she was daydreaming about real love again... and now she’s here. The prechorus is everything, so much of this album has left me incoherent with its sheer perfection and genius honestly it’s so hard to comprehend... her MIND. It’s so cute I hate I can’t believe I literally could cry and also there’s one part where she says “I’m with YOU!” and it made me think she’s saying “YOU!” in the way she says “ME!” with that pure celebration and joy and loving him because he’s the only one of him, too. I’m with YOU like ME also that sigh and how she says she wants ALL of it, the complications and dreary Mondays and to have him in ALL her dreams, good, bad, and in-between. Just like she wants his midnights... she wants all the midnight moments, the celebrations, the magic... but ALSO wants to be around for absolutely everything, cleaning up bottles on New Year’s Day. The everyday, quiet moments of companionship.

Cornelia Street | Oh... this one is surprisingly hard for me to listen to. When I first heard “Lover,” I brought up this Brené Brown quote about rehearsing tragedy—she talks about how joy is the most vulnerable emotion we experience. It’s so hard to immerse ourselves in joy because of how fragile it feels (she says it more eloquently), and that’s where this song hits for me. “Lover” is her being able to experience joy and contentment and let go of the need to prepare for the worst while “Cornelia Street” references the pull to dress rehearse tragedy. The song captures the risk of opening up to happiness, love, joy, any good feeling... because how could you survive if you lose that? Isn’t it better if you never feel so deeply and don’t have to worry about what’ll happen if you lose it? And she talks about that fear, about not wanting to open up and risk being hurt or made a fool of when she says she left Cornelia Street... but then he showed his hand (don’t even get me started on that line oh my heart). That song walks that delicate line of not dress rehearsing tragedy, but really conveying the vulnerability in finding any kind of love. And I love that she ties it to a street, to this concrete place that is nothing spectacular but for her is associated with her most cherished memories. Because that’s the other thing about love and loss—it’s not only extraordinary moments that matter. Love touches every part of your life.

Death by a Thousand Cuts | What a METAPHOR. Like holy shit. “Flashbacks waking me up,” “looking through the windows,” “can’t pretend it’s okay when it’s not.” It’s death by a thousand cuts. It’s prolonged and painful and persistent. It lingers. Ugh her MIND is just so brilliant and I feel so lucky that I happen to be alive at the same time as her? Like how wild is that???? “Paper cut stings from my paper thin plans” is so clever?? The way she says “lawless” is so good???? And the LONELINESS of asking a traffic light if it will be alright... of hoping for a sign, any kind of sign. And rather than saying she found comfort or affirmation, she says their answer was “I don’t know.” The courage and loneliness and fear and heartbreak of living with that uncertainty... this is So Much™

London Boy | This song is so Pure 🥺 Like... that’s it that’s the song it’s so fucking cute and simple and sweet, using all these London terms... it is Soft and Pure there is no other way to describe this song.

Soon You’ll Get Better | I knew as soon as I heard about this song that it would be one of my favorites because it’s just who I am... but this song is so beautiful and reminds me of her older work because of how simple the production is. I think a lot of why I love this song is the same as why I love “You Learn to Live Without” and my analysis would be similar—the chorus is so simple and repetitive because she’s repeating it to herself, to her family, to anyone. “You’ll get better soon... because you have to.” It’s like telling someone, promising them, that it’ll be okay; you can’t know, you can’t ever know. But sometimes you say it because you have to. Because there’s no other option. In “You Learn to Live Without,” it’s a similar situation... almost every line starts with what “you learn” how to do. It’s repetitive and she relies on that when she falters. It feels like there’s no way to survive such a devastating loss, but you learn, because you have to. There’s no other option. The song is so simple and the lyrics are everything that makes Taylor Swift music so special. Personal, specific, and yet relatable in, even because of, its specificity. You can hear her shaky breaths, which is always devastating. The bridge took my breath away because I’ve expressed those exact feelings before, and it hurts my heart that she’s felt it but it also is why I love her so much, because it connects so deeply.

False God | Going from “Soon You’ll Get Better” to this is a LOT (to be fair, anything would be) but it also reminds me of desperation and makes sense in that way—how you turn to anything at all, even a false god, if it will help you make it through. And that line about daring him to leave her... what a mood. But also bless Joe Alwyn. Also we neED TO TALK ABOUT THE FLAWLESS TRANSITION INTO YNTCD THAT WAS SO SATISFYING HER M I N D.

You Need to Calm Down | The “oh-oh” totally gets to me because when she was about 12-14 months, my focal child used to go “uh-oh” in almost the exact same way, so I always hear it in her voice. I love these lyrics because they’re just... so fun?? To shout???? And SHADE NEVER MADE ANYBODY LESS GAY SO

Afterglow | I had no idea what to expect from this song, but I love it. The connection she makes about fighting because there’s “chemistry until it blows” is so good because then you can really picture and understand what she means when she says “meet me in the afterglow.” It’s the quiet after the storm, when things are calm and hazy and you can take a step back and reflect. You can truly listen. And if you stay, like she asks him to, you can survive it. You may even have a stronger relationship because of it. And she wrote this song about taking responsibility and the messy parts of a relationship and how hard it is when you hurt someone you love and it’s just so beautiful that she allows us into this process, all the messy and flawed lessons in learning how to heal and forgive and love.

ME! | I’m so proud of her for reaching this point because it’s true, she’s the only one of her. There will never be another Taylor Swift... her incredible ability to write songs, to make music, to connect, her generosity, her love, everything about her... she is SO special.

It’s Nice to Have a Friend | I’m going to give this one a little more time because I love the idea of the song, the lyrics, the simplicity, but I need more time to really decide how I feel.

Daylight | This song makes me so emotional in the way I always get when I listen to “Call It What You Want” and hear how happy she is, she’s doing better than she ever was... she’s so happy and I love her so much and this is all I wanted for her agh but also this song, what a beautiful song. “I’ll tell you the truth but never goodbye” is just... unconditional love. I’m in love with the way she sings “daylight,” it echoes the entire song. Something about it is just lighter, louder in a soft, airy, ethereal way. It gets lighter, like you can hear it take on the quality of daylight. There’s so many things calling it back to old songs, too. I kept thinking about “this love is glowing in the dark” because this song is about how love, true love, is golden like daylight. It glows. And how she’s been sleeping in the darkest, longest night, but now all she sees is daylight. This love glows in the dark and glows so bright that it overcomes it. And then she so explicitly calls back to “Red” and how she used to think love would be burning red, but she’s realized instead that it’s golden. Red love is so fiery and passionate in all its emotions, and the idea of something being fiery means that it could, occasionally, be golden, when it’s glowing bright. But that’s an intense golden... this golden is soft. Ethereal is the best word I have for it. She sings of golden daylight, and this song is that—daylight. It’s true gold; it isn’t burning red because it’s softer. It’s warmth, not heat. It’s contentment, it’s quiet, it’s safety, it’s trust, it’s reconciliation. It’s illuminating, but not blinding. I just... this song is bursting with warmth and softness and light and I can’t get over it or put it into better words.

tl;dr I love Taylor Swift with my whole heart and Lover is simply incredible and, quite frankly, THAT bitch. 💘💕✨

#taylor swift #lover #lover album #taylor nation #ANYWAY who wants to converse

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fmdtaeyongarchive · 5 years ago

Text

↬ you’re my ice queen.

date: idk late 2019 ig

location: an unspecified studio.

word count: 1,472 words.

summary: n/a.

notes: creative claims verification for “ice queen” by san.

ash often begins writing a new song based on a melody he can’t get out of his head or a sound he hears somewhere that he wants to work into the production of a new track or, most frequently, with a lyric that comes to mind. this song starts in a way that’s rare for ash: with a title.

ice queen.

the term evokes immediate associations in ash’s mind. it’s a common trope in media, the beautiful woman with a cold facade.

he starts by going to the same producer friend with whom he’d written “betcha” and asking if they want to work on this song with him too. the producer has the availability in his workload to agree and everything starts with a session brainstorming what direction they want to take the song’s themes in. an entire song can’t be crafted around a title without a better picture of what they’re going for as a whole.

when they’d written betcha, they’d already tackled the determination of winning someone over in a game of playing hard to get and ash doesn’t want to repeat the same motifs for ice queen, as expected as they might be for a song of such a title. “i want it to be more tenderly romantic,” he insists early in the session, “like two people falling in love with each other instead of only one side of the story. he’s trying to woo her and she’s not the type to show her feelings easily, but there are hints that show the romance goes both ways.” luckily, the producer agrees and they settle on that as the overarching storyline for the song. they go back and forth for a while before ash proposes the idea of hot versus cold, the singer warming the woman’s seemingly cold heart with his warm and unwavering affection.

without much by way of lyrics, they come to the mutual decision to start working at the instrumental they want to craft. it’s important for them to find ways to bring the title to life in the instrumental. “chilly synths,” ash suggests first, and he knows what he means but he doesn’t think the other producer does, so he spends time laying down a synth pattern to demonstrate and in the process, he lays a rough beat over top too. with only the synths and the beat, the bare bones track already has a clear sound — something akin to dreamy, mid-tempo r&b.

that alone gives them a good base and they go back and forth with the program for hours trying to make decisions they can both agree on. a basic melody is determined by the end of the first hour, but it takes many more for them to play around with the chord pattern and song structure. as the night grows late and the fast back and forth of discussion grows dull with exhaustion, they agree to pack up and come back later. ash would like to get the demo to san as soon as possible and it wouldn’t be the first time he’s worked through barely being able to keep his eyes open, but the producer insists that they’ll only ruin a good thing if they keep chipping away at instrumental in a fatigued state, so ash relents.

when they return to the same studio to get back to work, ash brings a page full of ideas in his notes app. his first proposal is to incorporate snaps into the beginning to ease the percussion in that they’d already set later on in the song. they don’t want to give all of their tricks away from the beginning. it should be ever-changing, as he also proposes. he’d spent some time thinking about it, and he doesn’t want the song to be boring. ash works with r&b tracks regularly now, and that’s a trap he’s learned they can fall into. a soulful voice can carry a dull track and he has full faith san will deliver in that area, but as a creator of the song, ash shouldn’t be lazy and rely on the singer to give the song all of its best moments. san will get the chance to shine, but ash refuses to present him with the weight of having to deliver above and beyond a normal vocalist to make anything worthwhile out of the track.

once they get back into working on it, ash has to admit his fellow producer had had a point. they’re more well-rested, or as well-rested as ash can possibly be when constant fatigue envelops him in a cloudy haze on a daily basis that he’s learned to power through, and they’re getting more done in the span of a few hours than they would have all night if they’d kept working on it before.

the instrumental is close to complete after a few more sessions and the cold musical tones they’d agreed on at the beginning of the writing process have materialized. it’s not too far off from something knight would sing, if ash really thinks about it, but it’s not a carbon copy of anything they or alien have released either, so ash doesn’t dwell on the thought for long. there are more important topics to think about, like the need to put lyrics to what is now a mostly finished base for the song.

“i had a few ideas that came to me over the past few weeks. we talked about the contrast between the girl’s cold exterior and the singer’s warm advances...” ash looks to the other man for reassurance that he hadn’t imagined it. “i like the idea of using a lot of descriptive imagery for this song, stuff about melting and burning and flames and freezing. the music sounds sensual, but we shouldn’t lean into it too much with innuendo and suspense. i told you, i want romance, so if it’s sexy, it needs to be from the emotions of it instead of the outright suggestiveness.”

ash offers up some of the lyric drafts he’d written up, but the response he gets isn’t what he’d expected.

“you seem to have a clear vision of what you want for the lyrics. a much clearer vision than i do. you know i’m more of a music guy than a lyric one. how about you work on a full lyric draft and you can bring it back to me? we’ll make any music adjustments we need to to fit what you come up with.” ash doesn’t put up a fight. he’s perfectly happy to do that. writing the full lyrics of a song isn’t much of a challenge anymore, so there aren’t any insecurities to get in the way. it should be fairly easy and the other producer isn’t wrong that ash knows what he wants.

he has more urgent deadlines to get to, but that doesn’t stop ash from finishing his lyric proposal in quick time. it starts off simple enough, with the singer asserting their dedication to be there for the object of their affections wherever and whenever they need them with the first verse hinting at the title with a confession of how his world and sense freeze when he’s around the titular ice queen. he plays with the rhythm at the end of the first line and denotes it with an asterisk that tells him to tell the producer about it later. throughout, he chooses to play with the rhythm a few more times. it causes him to slip up more than once when recording the demo vocals, but san is a rapper; ash is confident it won’t cause problems.

it navigates into the chorus with a plea for reassurance that his affections are returned and that’s incredibly simple for ash. all it takes is a bit of channeling of his constant mindset lately and the early chorus is finished in only a few drafts. following the chorus introduction into the latter part of the chorus is where ash gets to branch into his flowery imagery with several of the lines he’d already had noted down when he suggested such a take on the lyrical content. he’s not shy to admit he’s proud of the work he does there and it’s the section he spends the most time perfecting. the second verse and the bridge come last and he writes them one after the other, though they’ll be separated by the chorus in the song and for those he focuses on building the romantic feeling he’d been so insistent about.

he sends the lyric draft off to the other producer with his notes for what he wants to change about the instrumental to match them better and he gets a message back only a few minutes later.

see? i told you you already knew what you wanted.

#fmdverification #&& queued

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cloudynames · 6 years ago

Text

The Earth Fell in Love with the Moon

okay the long awaited story is finally here!! jesus christ it took so long i am s o r r y. all that matters is that its finally here and i hope you all enjoy <33 this is one of my favorite pieces ive written in a long time so i hope itll satisfy everyone

Word Count: 6,468

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Sensual themes, swearing

lets get it

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If there were two things you were good at, it would be creating new gadgets and rejecting opportunities. Every step of your life, carefully crafted, led you to achieve your dream job at NASA. Out of the ordinary, you weren’t actually all too interested in space. You fell in love with rockets and mechanics. The sound of metal clashing and seeing your creation come to life fascinated and drew you in, trapping you within the life of a mechanic. However, you preferred to use your proper title of ‘Head of Maintenance and Mechanics.’ Life was extraordinary with a powerful position, having seen things no ordinary person would. Coming home covered in soot and sweat was fulfilling and you wouldn’t want it any other way nor felt the need to make additions.

As a result, rejecting the continuous romantic advances from a new trainee named Kun forced you to become abnormally professional when it came to denying someone of any desires, work or romance related. He arrived in the spring with an abundance of other rookies and as spring faded into summer, many of his comrades dropped like flies soon realizing the commitment it took to become a master of space.

Everyone left except a few, one of them being Qian Kun. Kun was a flame. No, not like a bonfire flame, ready to devour whoever got in his way of his dreams. Much to his dismay, he resembled a candle, barely burning and a threat to none.

Well, maybe a threat to you.

With a flat screwdriver in one hand and the other in a bag of screws, you started repairing the outside of the newest spacecraft, ready to be launched next season with high hopes for technological advances. You didn’t spend much time working on the rocket yourself due to your position but it seemed like everyone decided to take the day off in your department. Left mostly alone, you were running around to complete daily tasks while putting your foot forward for NCT 2XXX, also known as the pride and joy of your life.

Working with multiple people within the industry, you were one of the lead designers of NCT 2XXX, a marvelous spaceship with an exterior as strong as diamonds and interior just as remarkable. You have been with NASA for over five years and with NCT 2XXX for three. To say you were loyal to both projects was an understatement, you were unbelievably devoted. With a project as spectacular as this under your belt, you were bound to become one of the most famous engineers of all time. Perhaps in the future, historians would print the name with such care and remember the time from when they were a child, seeing the ship shoot off into sky for the first time.

Once the final screw for the plate was tightened into place, you sighed and peeped back at the row. It had only been a few minutes but it felt like forever, hunched over repeating the boring hand movements. Guilt exploded in your stomach. You’ve been assigning newbies to do this for months on end? A mental note was formed in your head, remembering to make sure they have some diversity.

A hand clamping down on your shoulder disturbed you greatly, almost spilling out bolts and screws from your pocket. Without turning around, you yelled, “Qian Kun! How many times must I tell you to leave me alone when I’m working!”

Giggles spill out of the offender as he shuffled closer to you. “Wow, this is what Head of Maintenance does all day? How come you never have time to talk me since you can multitask perfectly fine?”

Starting on a new row, you rolled your eyes dramatically, “Maybe it’s because I don’t want to talk to you?”

“Why are you so mean?!” Kun whines, pathetically stomping in place.

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” You snap, turning around and giving yourself a serious case of whiplash.

“I’m on break but I can leave if you really want me to!” He tempts, a mischievous glint lingering in his eyes.

“What’s the condition?” You exhaled heavily, mentally preparing yourself for whatever he decides to shock you with today.

“Go on a date with me!” He pleads, sticking out his bottom lip and giving you puppy eyes. Sweat drops smeared his forehead and his hair was messy from his training. Dark spots soaked through his training uniform and his glowing, honey skin was covered in bruises and scars. As pitiful as he appeared, you clicked your tongue in annoyance and turned around.

“I’m not interested, space boy.”

“But I’m interested.” He counters, frowning and nearly throwing a temper tantrum. Was this man really an adult or a man-baby?

Your mother had taught you that patience would be the greatest virtue in life. She had made sure you expressed it every day, having you write down one thing each day that you had to wait for and the relief following. With a hushed voice, she told you that good things came to those who were patience--especially to those patient with people. Kun was putting this theory to the test today.

“Ah yes, because bothering me every minute of the day will make me fancy a date with your lame ass!”

Before he can respond, his training coach blows a whistle, signalling breaktime was over. He burns holes into the back of your head, observing intently as you rummaged through the wool bag for a knot.

“I’ll be back.”

With that, he left in a flash and leaving you to nearly scream his name.

If Kun said he was going to be back, he was going to be back.

Five hours later and a provided lunch break from a local mom and pop place, you were seated in the meeting room with a water bottle and notepad. Tapping incessantly, you wondered why the higher-ups called you in for today. They never ringed for you, only when they needed to figure out why a rookie was causing trouble.

Suddenly, a click was heard and the shuffling of men and women came herding in, murmurs spreading across the room. Once comfortable in their respective seats, the woman at the head of the table opened, “Ah, (y/n), our most important piece to NASA!”

Rolling your eyes subtly, you give a sickly, sweet grin, “Yes, yes. How may I be of assistance today?”

The projector snapped to life and the lights dimmed. You turned to the screen, waiting for further information.

“Well,” a man with glasses and slicked back hair states, “We have all seen you work on NCT 2XXX and do believe us when we say that it is beyond terrific! That being said, one of our previous correspondences had recently left us due to seeking more and become greedy in his work. We need someone to finish WayV, another rocket for a specialised group of astronauts.”

Biting your tongue, you stared at everyone in amazement. “So I’m supposed to work on two projects?”

“Precisely.”

They left, shaking your hand and thanking you profusely for being so corresponding and helpful. The entire time, your mind was in overdrive. How were you supposed to finish two projects near the same launch date? It was near damn impossible! Of course they were sure to pay you more to compensate, but in such a short amount of time, maybe it was better to reject their advances. NASA had hired more engineers for this exact reason; why did it have to be you?

Staring at the blueprint on top of your wooden, almost broken desk, you reached over for your phone and checked the time. Midnight was plastered on your screen and you groan, extremely close to slamming your head on said desk. Your head was aching and your heart was pounding abnormally. Stress is an important part of life but after living life so plain and planned out, unforeseen problems caused you to lash out in your thoughts.

Marks began to appear on the sheet of paper as you sketched out a very, very rough version of the final product. With a haze clouding your mind and your eyes too focused on the design in front of you, Kun quietly snuck by and leaned down to your ear.

“Boo.”

Nearly falling back in your chair, you pushed yourself backwards with a hand on your chest. Kun, knelt over while dying of laughter exclaimed, “Oh my god! You should’ve seen your reaction!”

A rosy hue graces your cheeks, making you scrunch up your nose and return to your work. Mindlessly drawing hearts and stars and swirls in the corner of the paper, you mutter, “Why are you still here?”

“Aw, are you embarrassed? You never just ask me a question without calling me a name!” He teases, ruffling your hair and using a pointer finger to press deeply into your cheek.

Groaning, you push him away and huff, blowing the hair in front of your face to flip messily to the back. Kun wasn’t going to leave any time soon, especially if he was here already after his training period. You grab the stool which you were using to prop up your feet and slide it to the side of you, patting lightly on the top. He stares and points a finger at himself, asking ‘me?’ within his head. Adding an overdone nod finally connected the dots in his head, placing himself to the right of you.

“Are you going to ask my question or do I have to choke it out of you?” You threaten, playing with the lead in the pencil a little too much for his liking.

“Ah, well to be quite honest, I’m not sure. I guess I didn’t want to go back to the dorms just yet.” He reasons, avoiding your judgemental gaze.

Kun was a man of many talents. On his first day, officially hired as an astronaut, he entertained the conference room with a deck of cards, magically shaking one and flipping it over to reveal a heart. Your superiors were impressed, slowly falling in love with his charisma from day one. Then, a few days after while carrying in a shipment of new parts, you overheard a sugary voice singing in a tongue unfamiliar to you. Perhaps you lingered around the area longer than needed only for Kun to walk out with wet hair and still buttoning up a shirt. He flashed a smirk to you and strolled the opposite way, leaving you to slump against a wall, desperately trying to fan yourself off. From that day forward, his furrowed eyebrows and pushed back hazel locks had you stealing glances at the boy. One would be a fool to reject the attractiveness of Qian Kun. He was charismatic, talented, and handsome.

Although he was practically a Greek man, he was a terrible liar.

Humming in response and letting it pass by you for now, Kun broke the silence, “Why are you here though?”

“Well, I’ve been assigned a new project and unfortunately it won’t be completed during regular work hours, hence why I’m staying here at,” you took a swift glimpse at your phone, “12:17.”

“Do you at least get paid extra?” He asks, stealing a pencil from your desk and twirling it between his fingers.

Rolling your eyes woefully, “Nope.”

“So why do you do it?’ He questions, throwing a fit and muttering about how he’ll take it up to the higher-ups for you not receiving adequate pay.

With an exasperated yawn, you stare with him with stars within your eyes and a drowsy smile painted on your lips, “Because I love my job.”

Kun gawked at you, mouth slightly parted open. A lot of the time, you pushed him away yet here he was, sitting so close to you and conversing with you like close friends would do. With your tousled hair, falling upon your face and framing you beautifully, he gulped. Your doe eyes seemed to look into his soul and he was afraid you might find all his secrets he has casted away. The bags under your eyes and puffy, red cheeks displayed off the delicate side of you that he wasn’t sure you even possessed until tonight. At work, you were always headstrong and devoted. Seeing you in such a way had his heart pumping wildly, so much so that he almost led one of his hands to hold his chest for he felt that his heart was going to burst. You were hardworking, intelligent, and beautiful.

Qian Kun was simply smitten for you.

Increasingly, Kun had started to stay behind longer with you, assisting you as you worked late until dawn. He barely had any time to sleep but sharing secrets and giggling in the dusty work closet made up for all the time lost. Both of you would make fun of your superiors or play silly computer games in one of the research rooms while eating whatever Kun decided to cook that night. It wasn’t all fun however, you made sure of it. He would help you lift objects and hammer out sheets, bringing you closer to completing both WayV and NCT 2XXX.

Even though he stayed with you until ungodly hours almost every day, you questioned his true intentions. Every time you asked him why he stays late, he simply shrugs and answers with a joke. Deep down, you wished for there to be a hidden reason. Spending more time with the Chinese boy had you falling for him harder than before. Your hateful scowls turned into fluttering adorations and fluttering touches. A friendship was developing before your eyes and as you began to know more about Kun, you started to become dependent on the extra company.

For the past two days, you waited patiently near your desk for the boy to come bouncing to your side. Unfortunately, you would receive no call and were left to work in utter silence except for the melodic piano arrangements lulling softly in the background. As a result, this led you to believe Kun was upset at you. Flashbacks occurred in your head as you thought back to what could’ve frustrated the joyful boy. You did spill a sticky, dark soda on his white shirt just a few days before he disappeared. But was Kun one to hold grudges?

On the third night of listening to the same piano arrangement, footsteps emerged from behind you and you shut off your phone, turning your head before facing a sleep-deprived Kun. His face was adorned with purplish undereyes and stress written all over. He moved sluggishly, grabbing his usual stool before slowly setting himself on top. Kun watched with tired eyes, no life found within them at all.

“Are you okay?” You ask, concerned, and place a hand on his shoulder. Rubbing small circles in his back, you hope to comfort him in such a time of distress.

“Yeah, training has just been really… rough.” He trails off, eyes falling to his lap and moving further away from your touch.

Nodding, you resume to your work. You wanted Kun to be here for the past few days, but why is it that when he appears, you wish to be alone? His cold presence disturbed you and your wish to disappear grew. An irritated Kun was not someone anyone would want to spend time with.

“They told me I would never be an astronaut.”

You nearly drop the circuit board as his voice falters, hoarse and defeated. Setting down the piece of technology, you scoot closer to him.

“Don’t listen to them.”

He laughs mockingly, shoving his head in his hands. “I have to. Our test results and training progress came out. My test results are fine; I’m average. Yet, my training scores are the lowest in the group of all the rookies combined. I got yelled at by my teachers and one of them said, very distastefully might I add, that I would never make it to the sky. He mocked me, saying I might have the confidence and cool factor but I would never accomplish anything or become anyone.”

When he lifts his head, his cheeks are stained with waterfalls and his lip quivers for relief. Out of character, you grasp him and pull him into your chest, hugging tightly. Tentatively, he wraps his arms around you and bursts into tears once more. Your skin feels hot and sticky from his hold and your lab coat rapidly becoming soaked from his cries. A hand drifts up to his hair as you curl his locks between your fingers, shushing him as his sobs grow in volume. The once joyful boy was now wailing in your arms about how he’ll never be good enough for anything. Heartache hurts, especially because Kun is so cheerful all the time. Never in a million years you would’ve thought that a day might come where he shows his piled up hidden feelings of stress.

His body gradually stops shaking and he removes himself from you, rubbing his cheeks and eyes. You pass him your water bottle and he laughs, taking a sip. Although he appears better, sorrow hides in his iries and your own tears well up. It’s time to repay Kun for all his charity.

“Kun, you’ve helped me throughout this entire project for Wayv. I think it’s time for me to help you.” You state, flashing him a wide smile.

“No! I’m okay! You don’t need to.” He argues, sulking.

Ah, there it was. His fiery personality made a come back from his recent gloomy demeanor.

“I want to and I will. That is final.”

His pout expands and your grin only grows as you return to the circuit board, knowing you won against Kun.

The next night, with two energy drinks and a haul of textbooks, the two of you laid down in one of the break rooms with the comfiest couches and softest blankets.

You examine one of his test scores, curled up in a blue comforter.

“Hm, your mathematics skills are off the charts good. Did you major in math?”

He nods, looking over terms in his notebook. Kun flips through the words too briskly for your liking. How did he even retain any of that information?

Scrunching your nose distastefully, you start, “You’ll never learn terms with definitions like that. Use flashcards or use an app that’ll repeat the answer and definition multiple times.”

His mouth hangs open, shocked at your abrupt reprimand. “I never had to do that! Math is so easy. You barely have to memorize anything! Only a few theorems but you could practically bullshit that.”

“Well, now you have to. Your biology is good but your physical science and engineering has work to be done.”

He lets out an obnoxious groan, snuggling deeper within the blanket wrapped around him. After a few moments of him complaining, he grabs a pen and a few flashcards, diligently writing down terms to definitions. You scoot closer to him, your head so close to leaning on his shoulder.

“Thank you.” A quiet voice whispers and he turns his head to you, a small smile graced upon his face.

“Of course. If you told me you were struggling earlier, I could’ve helped you more.”

A groan falls out of his mouth, “No, (y/n). You’re too busy with your projects anyway. I don’t want to bother you.”

“You’re not bothering me at all!” You grumble, bumping into him and having his pen spill from a perfect line to a crooked mess. He glares, relining his design.

“I felt like I was though at one point.” He confesses, tapping his pen repeatedly against his book, eyes piercing into yours like daggers. “Why did you try to push me away so much?”

Ah, you should have foreseen this. Kun was a curious man, hence the reason for striving to become an astronaut. He asks questions until he makes you beg to just shut up. All his teachers probably wanted to kill him by now due to his incessant whining. His goal, clear in mind, was to find out the reason behind your fake distaste for the cadet. Red as a ruby, you lifted your head and gazed back, faked your innocence, “What do you mean?”

He shoves his work aside and adjusts his entire body, muscles flaunting off. Has Kun always been so lean?

“Obviously I’m talking about a month ago where you wanted to punt me into space if you ever got the chance.”

“Haha, very funny.” You mock, truly laughing afterwards. “To answer your question, I don’t know what changed.” To take the leap of faith or not might’ve been the hardest decision in your life. Nothing in your life could’ve prepared you for this exact moment in life. Comparing this dangerous moment to everything in college, you rather take every course all over again. If he rejects you, you’re back to the mundane life you’ve always known. Although in the slightest chance he might accept you, life would be a fairytale.

Fuck it.

“Maybe it’s how your eyelashes flutter when you’re almost asleep or how you push your hair back just the way I like it. I don’t know when everything changed. To put it simply, I started noticing things about you that nobody else would ever notice. You like black coffee but if you didn’t have to restrain your calorie intake, you would order the sweetest thing on the menu. Whenever you laugh at something stupid, you throw your head back and hide yourself, embarrassed to be in the moment. But no, it could’ve been when you mumbled translations under your breath as you read instructions or how your fingers ghosted upon my skin late at night. I think I really am whipped for you--”

Kun gently grabs your face and closes the long gap between you two, his tongue licking your bottom one and exploring your mouth. Still focused on you, he unwraps himself from his cocoon and climbs on top of you, hands running through your hair, desperate and longing. He made you experience all this pent up emotion he had towards you and it felt as if you were floating on a cloud. It was dirty. Lying in one of the breakrooms with a boy, who you weren’t even dating, and having his hands roam all over your body.

His hips rolled against yours, making you gasp at the sudden contact. Whether it had been accidental or on purpose, you craved for the motion to happen once more. Kun smelled like vanilla and left your head hazy and light. Hands disappeared from your hair and moved under your shirt, his thumb playing with your waistband. His breath was sweet and tasted like the chocolate shared between the two of you just a few hours ago. He pulls away suddenly, a string of saliva forming and the sight has you heavily breathing. Kun leans down once more and leaves a kiss on your forehead and you reach for one of his hands, intertwining your fingers.

“So, you’re clearly experienced. Have you been kissing any other engineers other than me?”

“Shut up!” He yells, tickling you relentlessly for a minute before brushing your disheveled hair out of your eyes.

“Only you, baby. It’s only ever been you”

Midnight blue nights with Kun was the highlight of your life. Working all night till dawn seeped into Kun’s dorm fulfilled you and you wouldn’t have it any other way. It might’ve been harder to focus due to calculated distractions conducted by the mischievous boy but when it came down to crunch time, both you and Kun worked in perfect harmization. The beginning of summer morphed into a deep heat of August before you even had a chance to blink and walks to the convenience store to buy ice cream became a must to combat the humid heat.

Glancing at your phone, you inwardly groaned seeing the time was only five. It would be so long until you could see Kun again. With your brain being fried from all the hard work from the day, you took a break. Mindlessly, you scrolled through social media and caught up with the recent drama. Your break was cut short as a squeal was shouted directly into your ear and arms wrapped around you.

“What the hell--”

“Baby! I got in! They accepted me for Project WayV! I’m so excited!”

Your boyfriend’s eyes were gleaming with pure, unsaturated happiness. A smile melts onto your face and you envelope him in a embrace just as emotional as his. You had seen how hard Kun had been working for his goal. He would stay up nights on end studying and if he wasn’t studying, he would be assisting you in your projects. Sometimes he would stay at your house and you would do laundry, not forgetting to notice how the size of his uniform changed from an extra small, gradually transforming into a small and finally to a medium. If he wasn’t studying or helping you, he was training. Love filled you and contentment hugged every curve of your body. To say you were proud was an understatement. This had been everything Kun had craved for.

Would it be selfish, however, to hate the future? Yes, Kun had been working hard to become an astronaut but once summer becomes cool and sweltering, fiery red days fade, where would Kun stand? In the sky trapped in a box, gathering research for greedy scientists on the small earth below? Would you be alone once more as you were just a few months ago? Would you despise the blue, crystal region for stealing the one you loved the most?

Mustering all your strength possible into faking a grin, you exclaim, “I’m so proud of you dear, you deserve it!”

A piece of your soul chipped away from that moment and it became difficult to face the future. Kun would be gone. For a long time. The worst case scenario might arise and he might never come back.

You were never the villain in the story. Trying to delay Kun’s dream would make you the monster. No, you’re not the monster. Minoring in theatre in college helped you after all. Fake it till you make it, right?

If it meant you had to lose everything for Qian Kun, you would give everything in a flash.

Motivated, you labored away more than ever. Rarely ever leaving the station, you were hunched over and slaving over numerous tasks every day. A fool you would’ve been if you didn’t think Kun would notice. One thing could contest his love for the mystery of space and that thing was you. If his dear was feeling slowed down, he would pick you up and aid you.

“Let’s go get slushies.” He offered a hand out to you one late night, forehead covered in sweat from being stuck in a poorly air-conditioned room. You accepted his hand, letting him drag you on another summer adventure. Evil thoughts plagued your mind. Surely, this wouldn’t be the last trip?

The walk was mostly quiet, the only noise being made was when Kun nearly tripped over the curb.

(“How was I supposed to know that the curb was there!”

“By looking, sweetheart.”)

He bought you a cherry slushie, leaving him with a blueberry one. With syrupy hands, he grabbed yours and swang them between the two of you.

“Baby, can you enlighten me?”

Confused, “What’s up?”

Ah, Kun never fails to amaze you. He is simply too intelligent and observant for his own good.

“Are… you okay?”

“Nothing, precious.” A lie escapes you before you realize what you’re saying. Had you been so accustomed to lying that it slips out at this point?

Kun drags you to slow down, having you turn around and look at him. In the late summer evening with pink and orange mixing in the azure reflecting off his skin had your heart stop beating for a second. His plump pink lips were stained with blue and the sides of his hair were still wet from sweat. This picture perfect sight had you falling in love all over again. You wouldn’t see this scene again in an undetermined amount of time. If he went up to the beautiful atmosphere, how would you be able to hear his luscious voice? Could you bear to wake up every morning to a cold bed?

“Stop lying, (y/n).”

Another jump of faith this time more daring.

“I’m petrified.” You admit.

“Of what?” His voice is soft and gentle, so familiar and so heart-warming.

“The future.” A tear falls from your eye and you feebly laugh. Where had it come from? Soon, you were full-on bawling. Kun rushes to your side in an instant, shushing you and hugging you.

Moments in life make us want to pause, rewind, fast forward, and record. In one instant, you wanted to complete all four. You would pause to savor this exact act and scene in life. If you were ever feeling down, you could rewind and relive this moment over again. To fast forward was dangerous, but it would need to be done to see the future for the two of you, something to look forward to. Finally, recording every single happening in this one frame to remember one of the last moments before the sky took away Qian Kun, your space boy.

“Baby, I’m scared too.” He reveals, shakily and nervously. “I don’t want to lose you, dear god I would collapse if I lost you.”

You nod, not able to respond or form a corrhent sentence. He speaks for you.

“You’re my first and last. Without you in my life, I would be so lost. I wouldn’t even be on the project for WayV! You’re my beginning and my end and everything in between. If you say no, I won’t do it. I will deny the project. Of course, NASA will be pissed at me,” he laughs, trembling upon your skin, “but if it’s to make you smile once more, even if it was one last time, I’ll do it.”

Rejection dances on the tip of your tongue. To say yes and have Kun next to you every day and night sounded like a fairytale. Your dream would truly come alive, yet where would Kun’s dream fall? With a heart begging no, ‘please don’t leave me,’ your mind wins once more against a terrible, cruel decision.

“My space boy, you’re so foolish. You have to go up there. No if, ands, or buts. That is final.”

With tears streaming down both of your faces, he tilts your head up and kisses you with more passion than the first night he confessed. It was a battle of love and bitterness. Your tongues fought over dominance, wanting to show the other their passionate feelings.

With blue and red tongues mixing and leaving each other’s lips with purple, bruised lips, you two took the longer route home. You might’ve minored in theatre, but you weren’t sure if majoring would’ve helped you from seeing Kun’s sparkling, chocolate-colored eyes. The entire time felt like you were under a lie detector. Perhaps in some alternate universe, the two of you would’ve never expressed your doubts..

Fall knocked at your door quicker than you had anticipated. Trips to the convenience store dwindled and stops at either Kun’s dorm or your apartment became more popular. Time was ticking away slowly and the two of you tried to spend as much time together. With each fun, spectacular day came with a night full of depression. Kun’s time was slowly draining and his launch date snuck up on you. He would be in space for nine months, one of the longest trips done in recent years. It terrified you but it motivated you to work harder than before. For him.

So that he can come back safe.

October 15, the day that was another page to mark in history and another date to burn in your mind. Waking up in your cold, sad apartment had you crying before you had even stepped into the bathroom. Traces of Kun were left all around. His hoodies, draped over chairs, left a cut in your heart, piercing every vein in your body. Fate was cruel. What was more cruel than fate was free will. If you said pleaded to him to not leave you, he would be next to you right now in the scalding, hot shower, leaving butterfly kisses across your nape.

Today would be another performance; a test of your acting abilities. To fool everyone and make them believe that you were the happy, supportive partner. Your mind drifted away at your workstation, not paying much attention to the world around you. People noticed and caught on fast, offering a hand when you needed an errand run down to Mission Control or a speedy calculation.

Never did anyone say you were good at acting.

Dreadfully, you glanced at the clock and gulped. Take-off is in less than two hours and Kun wouldn’t be able to see anyone in due time. You rush around the building, asking superiors and juniors if they had seen the boy. Following directions from Head of Security, you rapped your fist against the waiting room door.

“Come in.” A soft, possibly tearful, voice whispered, just loud enough to hear on the other side of the door.

Opening the door and closing it gently, a hug greeted you from inside the room. Vanilla overwhelmed your sense and you melted in Kun’s arms, gripping onto him with a strong force.

“Love--” You begin but are cut off abruptly by Kun’s lips crashing into yours. A pattern forms and you both fall into the rhythm, quiet moans slipping from the sinful mouths of both. Kun had this amazing power to make you lose all train of thought when with him and you forgot every dreadful moment leading up to this point until he broke away.

“Where do I start?” He laughs anxiously, a hand pushing away the hair in his face. “God, I’ll miss you so fucking much. It hurts so much thinking about it.” Kun takes your hand, dragging it to his chest and letting you feel his heartbeat. His heart beats rapidly and you clench the protective suit.

“I’ll miss you more.” You murmur, planting kisses upon his neck. He pulls away and chuckles at your sour expression.

“Let me talk for once. Doll, I truly will miss you. I ran to the convenience store to print out every photo I had of you in my phone so I would have it on the trip.” He snickers, a tear falling from his eye and you reach out to wipe it away. If only you could erase every tear he’ll have after he’s gone.“It’ll be hard, but I’ll try to record every day without you so you can watch it once I’m back. You know I don’t like talking about myself, but I’m so afraid of this trip. It’s dangerous as hell and there might be so many complications. Believe me, this world will not take me away without seeing you one last time. Don’t worry, baby. I will be okay.”

You were whimpering at this point and huffed stiffly with each passing second. Everything you wanted to hear was coming out of Kun’s mouth, but knowing that he’ll be gone in just a few hours stings at your skin. He recognizes this and rubs your back, letting you live in this scene. After your weeping slowed down, he requested a wish, something so personal and hopeful.

“You’ll wait for me?”

With a pathetic giggle, “If you bring me back a star.” He bursts out in laughter, doubling over. Always so lighthearted.

“I love you.” He confesses, a sorrowful expression painting his face.

“I love you more, space boy.”

Words left unspoken stopped at your tongue. Kun wouldn’t know that he was your star that night.

And the nights before.

He was the star of your life.

--------------------------------

A cloud of white exhaust spreads over the sandy field and the whole of NASA erupts into joy. Many are hugging their friends, some are with their lovers. The cameras pan back to the crowd, bouncing around and cheering as the gigantic, white spacecraft launches itself into the sky. The launch was successful, no failures or any worries. You checked every single valve and bolt yourself, of course it would be perfect.

Watching through a glossy window, your hand touched where the earth met the sky. The more you stared into the abyss, the more you appreciated the beauty. It wasn’t a single shade of blue, no. The sky, your sky, mixed with all shades of baby blue and flecks of gold and white shimmered brightly. It was like if someone took a paintbrush and went over the canvas repeatedly until they ran out of paint. If this glistening azure sky was so gorgeous, how did the deep blues of space match up to this competitor?

The clouds earn the sky extra points but with images of stars from past years makes your heart flutter in amazement. Humankind has accomplished so much in such little time and you, scientists and creatives, are leading the battle for improvement. Kun is a pioneer to this philosophy. One of the most brilliant leaders.

All the pieces locked into place as you observed the last gusts of white sputter and disperse. The moon and its gravitational pull kept the earth from getting out of hand and too far away to connect. Kun was the moon and you were earth, constantly being pulled to Kun whenever you wanted to shut down and hide from everyone. The simile makes you smile and you peer up, a tear escaping your duct. Hopefully Kun is viewing you from the oh, so tiny aircraft.

--------------------------------

Kun eyes the tiny earth, still strapped in his seat but able to obtain a view. He wishfully sighs, a smile breaking out onto his face.

He prays that you know he’s looking down at you, dreaming of a time where you could see something just as beautiful as right now.

Ah, maybe not as beautiful as he thought. He still has you, waiting patiently for his return. Now, you are the most ethereal sight he has ever had the chance to look at.

As soon as he receives the green from Mission Control, he unbuckles himself and moves to the supply room, reaching for one of the cameras and moving to a relatively quiet spot. With a deep breath, Kun turns on the camera.

“Hi baby, it’s your favorite space boy. Welcome to space, day 0!”

#nct #nct scenarios #nct imagine #nct headcanon #nct kun #wayv kun #wayv #nct qian kun #qian kun #nct 2019 #writing #kpop scenarios #kpop imagine #kpop headcanons #kun

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bburningbridges · 6 years ago

Text

The Little Things

Summary: Often, it's the little things that matter the most. (In which Kaldur loves, is loved, and learns how to open up piece by piece.)

This is a collection of scenes that were cut from the final draft of "in this life, the days are full of joy." Don't have the read the source material first but it definitely helps!

Notes: kaldur’ahm is the backbone of young justice!! he deserved better and he deserved a boyfriend!! im too lazy to write sequels but take these half-baked scenes i had to cut from the OG story <3

Kaldur leaves Roy’s apartment feeling unmistakably relaxed in a way he hasn’t felt in a long time. By his estimate, he has about 10 minutes to himself before he reaches the zeta-tube and has to melt his goofy expression into something much less humiliating so he can face his team.

He tries to think sobering thoughts, but mostly just revisits what shirtless Roy looked like with his feet up on the coffee table. Somehow, his impossibly dopey grin gets even worse.

Star City is already getting cooler, the warmth of summer long forgotten. Kaldur has never minded the cooler weather; it reminds him of home.

That seems to be the exact kind of grave topic he needed to stop smiling. Thinking of Atlantis reminds him of what Roy had said about Aquaman, how he was acting “bitchy” and worrisome. He feels his shoulders sag. Disappointing Aquaman has never taken priority on his to-do list, and yet, he manages it with reliable frequency and ease.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, the part of himself that strives to be at least partially self-aware begs him to address the topic that he’s been covering up for months. Well, years really, but it’s only been an ever-present addition to his daily train of thought since the summer. Founding the team had been a great distractor, but now that he has a comfortable routine going it’s safe to say that he might be going ever so slightly insane. Just a little bit.

You can’t ignore this forever, the rational, tiny part of his brain persists.

And it’s true. One day, Kaldur is going to have to address that he gets honest-to-goodness butterflies in his stomach when he’s around Roy, and that doesn’t happen when he’s with anyone else. He’s going to have to dig deeper than Garth and Tula had, he’s going to have to identify these feelings and who has them for -- and that scares him so badly he starts walking faster.

He cuts his 10 minutes down to seven, and by the time he’s reached the zeta-point his mind is carefully blank, save for the lingering memory of Dr. Pepper on his lips.

Upon returning to the Cave, Kaldur receives no less than three wolf-whistles, three open stares, and feels his heart climb into his throat when Zatanna comments, “Didn’t know you liked UCLA, Kal.”

He holds up his hands, not really sure what he wants to do with them, and winds up making a ‘go away’ gesture at all of them, to their delight.

He’d been so caught up in his head he completely forgot to change. His uniform is folded neatly in the duffel hanging off his shoulder -- he meant to change before getting here, so he could avoid all of...exactly what he’s getting right now.

“I didn’t even know you owned sweatpants,” Artemis says, with an infuriatingly cheeky grin. She’s squeezed between Robin and Wally on one of the loveseats, and she doesn’t actually look that upset about it. “You never struck me as the relaxing type?”

Kaldur looks down. Has been that high strung for so long? It really does feel great to see his team -- these days, he misses them more than he’s comfortable admitting -- but he really does not need this level of ribbing tonight.

“They’re not mine,” his mouth is saying, stupidly.

“I wonder whose they could be!” Zatanna sounds too damn happy about all of this, and Kaldur fixes her with a level glare for a moment. She set up him. This was a trap from the start.

“Roy could’ve at least followed the guy walking out with half his closet,” Wally says. “We never see him anymore! What gives?”

“He’s busy,” Kaldur and Robin say simultaneously, with very different inflections. Kaldur fixes him with a look too.

Robin holds his hands up in mock surrender. “I didn’t mean anything dirty, Kal! Get your head out of the gutter.”

Not that it was before, but now that Robin’s gone there he most certainly cannot, and to his chagrin, feels his face start to warm. This is too much. His relaxing night has taken too many left turns, and at this rate he’s either going to implode or end up waxing poetry about Roy’s biceps.

Covering his face with one hand, Kaldur leans his head back and groans. “Why do I let you do this to me?”

All of his teammates look at him with matching smiles from hell, including M’gann and Conner -- who feign innocence so perfectly but Kaldur knows they’re giggling like a bunch of toddlers via mindlink. Wally and Robin have the worst ones.

They know too much, Kaldur thinks. The not so rational part of his brain suggests fleeing the scene.

“You looove us,” Robin sings, hand over his heart.

“I tolerate too much,” Kaldur grumbles back.

“You tolerate the perfect amount.” Artemis stands at the same time Zatanna does, and the two make their way to the kitchen. “But now that you’re here, we can actually get started with movie night. Me and Zatanna have popcorn duty.”

“And by that she means I have ‘keep Wally out of the kitchen’ duty,” Zatanna snorts.

Kaldur blinks in confusion, and she pauses as she passes by him. “What, you thought we were gonna start the movie without you?”

“I…” Kaldur doesn’t know what he thought.

“Just don’t look so surprised whenever people actually give a shit about you, okay? I’m not sure if it makes me wanna hug you or deck everyone else.”

It seems like Roy has been right about more than a few things tonight.

Zatanna’s expression softens. “We waited for you because we wanted to, Kal. It’s not team bonding without the whole team, you know?” And then she pulls him in a quick but energetic hug and follows Artemis into the kitchen.

Feeling properly ridiculous, Kaldur makes to drop his bag off in his room, but M’gann insists that he leave it where it is and deal with it later. The lightheartedness of the night really does make him feel like they have all the time in the world. A little untidiness never killed anybody; he drops the bag and sits next to her on the long couch.

“We really did want to wait for you,” M’gann says helpfully, letting her hand drop on his knee. “And Artemis and Robin taught us a bunch of games!”

Robin snorts; in the time that Artemis had been away, he and Wally had managed to tangle themselves up in a Batman-themed blanket. “And by that she means we sat around and gossiped for like half an hour under the guise of Truth or Dare.”

“And 20 Questions,” Conner says. “Apparently, all my questions were boring.”

“The point of 20 Qs isn’t to ask someone what their favorite color is nine times in a row, buddy,” Wally says. “It’s to get someone to squirm a little and spill something really embarrassing.”

“I like knowing your favorite colors,” Conner replies with a shrug.

Wally makes a very exaggerated huffing sound and throws up his hands. Snickering, Robin says, “Wally’s just mad ‘cuz he kept wussing out on dares.”

“I didn’t wuss out--”

“It was a bit wimpish,” Conner says, as M’gann offers, “I don’t blame you for it!”

Wally just groans again.

Now that he’s not the object of teasing, Kaldur finds it in him to smile. “It sounds like you had fun.”

“After four uninterrupted hours of homework, yeah,” Robin says, petulance betraying his age. After a moment he grins again, and even though his dark glasses cover his eyes, Kaldur can imagine the gleam of mischief behind them. “After the movie, we’ll get another round of T or D going with you, Kal. That way you don’t get to miss out on any fun.”

Kaldur’s stomach feels like it sinks all the way into his toes. It’s stupid to think that Robin is doing anything sinister or diabolical -- he can be nosy but he’s not mean -- but Kaldur can’t shake the feeling that he’s being backed into a corner. As if someone just threaten to shine a flashlight on him and to see all the dark little details he keeps hidden away.

His heart pounds. Suddenly all the jokes about him and Roy, the knowing winks, the teasing -- doesn’t feel so lighthearted.

Kaldur tenses up and shrinks into the couch, not trusting himself to say anything without giving himself away. He sees Conner frown out of the corner of his eye, but Artemis and Zatanna come back with bowls of popcorn and save him from the rest of that conversation.

Something tells him that Robin is staring at him, but Kaldur ignores it and thanks Zatanna for his bowl of popcorn instead. To his surprise, she follows up with a blanket that she spreads out over his knees, then drops into the couch beside him and curls into his side like a kitten would. After a few moments of adjustments, she’s worked herself under his arm, popcorn bowl on his lap.

Again, he’s not sure when Zatanna adopted him, but he’s not even the slightest bit upset about it.

Robin gets the movie going, and for the next two and half hours they all watch Steig Larsson’s book come to life.

(Conner falls asleep about a half hour in, and M’gann leans against his chest and sighs, her contentment practically radiating off of her, and Kaldur’s heart just...hurts, watching it. That could be him. He wants that. He’s almost certain he will never have it.)

Throughout the movie, he can’t help but feel like his entire body has released a partial sigh--this is something he’d been wanting for so long. Just spending time with the team who had become his closest friends when he wasn’t paying attention. There’s no talk of school or family or life outside the Cave; it’s just them in the dark watching a movie and making the occasional side-comment.

It’s...really, really nice.

Kaldur makes a face during one of the darker scenes. “You enjoyed this?” he asks Zatanna quietly.

“Look at the job we have, Kal. I think we’ve all pretty much seen some messed up stuff.” She pauses. “For example, I watched a magic deity possess my dad and claim his body for the rest of forever. So, like. Call me jaded.”

Her jaw tightens as she says it, and Kaldur winces, apology at the tip of his tongue. Ultimately, he decides it’s not the right time. Looking at Zatanna, he recognizes himself; the desire to put on a brave face and march through pain, no matter the personal cost. Acknowledging it was rarely an option. Her jokes were just deflections to distract from her real vulnerability.

“Okay, Jaded,” Kaldur faux-whispers. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Oh my god,” Zatanna snorts and gets a chorus of shushes from the others.

Kaldur opts to relax around her, and she holds onto him just a hair tighter afterwards.

“Not bad,” Robin says after, as they all blink and adjust to the lights coming back on. “I figured out the so-called plot twist about five minutes in, but still. Not bad.”

“Five whole minutes? You’re getting slow, Boy Wonder,” Wally chides.

“I believe I still enjoy the book more, but it was a very well-done adaptation,” Kaldur says, peering down at Zatanna. “Your movie tastes have certainly earned my respect.”

“Noice,” she says around a yawn. “Next time, you get to pick though.”

“I’d be honored,” he smiles.

“And bring Roy around too,” she mumbles into his chest. “None of us would mind, and I’d like to finally meet the legendary Red Grump.”

And just like that, Kaldur’s state of undistracted relaxation is gone. Suddenly paranoid that Zatanna can hear how fast his heartbeat has gotten, he sits up, jostling her out of her comfortable snuggle, faking thirst. He tries to calm down as he chugs from his water bottle, but Conner ruins his concentration but saying, “Are you okay?”

Kaldur nearly drops and spills it. “I -- What?” he asks. “I thought you were asleep?”

“I was just resting my eyes,” Conner frowns. “Why does your heart rate keep racing like that?”

At Kaldur’s bewildered expression, Conner shrugs. “I keep an ear out. It’s good background noise. But also in case anything goes wrong.”

Kaldur nearly snaps at him to stop it, but that wouldn't be right. He sighs instead. “I am fine, Conner. Thank you for your concern, but it isn’t necessary.”

“Okay, then color me curious,” Conner pushes back. “What’s going on with you?”

Kaldur realizes that the rest of the team has gone quiet, listening in. The feeling of being cornered creeps down his spine.

Artemis clears her throat, looking a little awkward. “Actually, Conner brings up a good point. We’re all a little...curious.”

He jerks to look at her, back ramrod straight. “What do you mean?”

“You haven’t been yourself lately,” she says, looking down. “I mean, sometimes you’re a million miles away even though you’re standing right in front of us. Your default face just looks...sad.”

“Batman may have mentioned that Aquaman was worried about you,” Robin adds, pointedly nonchalant. “He didn’t want to pry. But the concern is definitely spreading.”

“Plus, you’re our friend. I mean yeah, you lead us into increasingly ridiculous situations, but you’re also just Kaldur the merman who we all actually care about and seeing you look like you’re not quite sure where your next footstep is gonna land is just…” Zatanna trails off and shrugs. She’s looking at her hands. “You’ve done so much for all of us, Kal -- even me, and I just got here!”

“What she’s saying is, it’s time you let us do the carrying,” M’gann says gently. “Lean on us for a little bit, okay?”

Part of Kaldur is touched. His heart sort of melts and he feels foolish clenching onto his water bottle for dear life. But at the same time, his instincts to deflect have never been sharper. He doesn’t want them to pry, and he doesn’t want to open up, because how do you even begin to explain something you’ve never even let yourself think about?

The half of his heart that aches for companionship feels so full right now, he thinks he might burst.

And as always, he’s self-aware enough to know that he is not hiding this as well as he’d hoped.

He opens his mouth but chokes on the silence.

He has options here. No one is going to say something unless he does, or until the silence stretches into the territory of hostile, and he doesn’t want that. So he has the floor, and he can either come clean about one of the many things plaguing him, or dodge like he was born for it.

The thing is, it’s not like Kaldur likes, or even actively tries to keep everyone an arm’s length away. It’s just easier that way. Rather than bear the weight of social exile, or even risk being looked at differently, it’s easier to just...truck on. One can’t get hurt if he nevers offers others the opportunity to hurt him. There isn’t a portion of his brain that definitively believes his team would shun him if he came forward with the part of himself he hides away; it’s not like they’d run off to Batman and tell him Kaldur likes a boy, he’s unfit to lead, but that doesn’t mean there aren't icy tendrils of terror gripping his heart right now.

“This…” Kaldur starts, and everyone leans forward just a little bit. Waiting.

“This is a bit overwhelming,” he says honestly. “I am not sure that I...this is much more complicated than my words can explain.”

Robin is giving him that look again. Like he’s a puzzle--an especially difficult one. “Kaldur,” he says, without a hint of humor in his voice. “Truth or dare?”

This is the flashlight moment. His under a microscope moment. Kaldur can barely meet his eyes. He wants to talk to his friend, his heart hurts for it, for the connection, but at what cost?

But Robin is giving him an excuse to open his mouth, so he takes it.

“Truth?”

“Tell us,” says Robin, “whatever you want to. But just be honest.”

That’s a big request. Honestly, Kaldur wants to tell them what has been clawing at his heart for so long; that he is lonely, that this Cave is so empty and he days are so long without them. That his heart longs for someone that cannot and will not allow himself to have. That he loves in way he fears they will find ugly and disgusting -- even he himself fears it, and it makes no sense, and he’s both angry and jealous that Conner and M’gann don’t have to fear their love. They don’t question what their hearts feel, they don’t over analyze and dissect every moment and passing thought and try to shove it down as they burn with shame.

He wants to say, I like a boy, without his throat closing up or the world coming to a halt. Maybe he’s not ready to air all his dirty laundry, but he can at least start somewhere.

At the root of this all, Kaldur just really, really doesn’t want to feel so alone anymore.

“I am very grateful for all of you,” Kaldur’s mouth says before his brain can stop it. “So grateful, in fact, that I find myself missing you more often than not.”

Zatanna makes a tiny sound of understanding, but the others seem lost.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean you get to live a life outside of the team. You get to go to school and meet your friends and sleep in your homes, and I am either here dreaming of Atlantis, or here waiting you to come back. I don’t...the issue is not that the Surface doesn’t feel like home. It’s that I feel at home when I’m with you, and that seems to be so...rare these days.”

The silence is deafening. Then Wally says, “Aw, jeez, Kal.”

Conner frowns in a way that is far more emotional than his default. “I’m not gonna lie, I wasn’t expecting that.”

“Me either...but it’s true, isn’t it? We have been hanging out outside of missions less…” M’gann admits reluctantly. “Things have just been so busy since summer ended, especially with school.”

“I’d drop high school in a heartbeat to spend more time here, I swear, but my parents would never buy it.”

Kaldur has to fight the urge to roll his eyes. “I would never ask that of you, Wally. School is important. You cannot just leave.”

“I already told you I’d do it if anyone would let me,” Zatanna says. She sounds like she’s only half-joking.

“Alter ego life is pretty jampacked,” Artemis says. “We’re sorry, Kal. And not just like, a little sorry -- we’re really sorry. You know if we could stay longer, we would.”

“I know,” he says. For some reason, that just makes everyone seem even more unhappy.

The silence lasts several more moments, and Kaldur wishes he hadn’t said anything at all. Robin has finally stopped examining him, but now his expression is even harder to read.

“Okay,” Robin says, steepling his fingers. “Switching the game to 20 questions. Question number one -- can you promise us that you’ll tell us these things more often? You’ve got one heck of a poker face; we can’t know what’s up unless you say something.”

Kaldur looks sheepish. He nods quietly. “I will do my best.”

“Question two, did you write all that down before you said it? Or was that off the top of your head? ‘Cuz that was like, Obama-level good, dude.”

Trust Wally to break the tension; Robin digs his elbow into his side while the others chuckle, and Kaldur manages a smile himself. “I do not answer stupid questions.”

“Oh c’mon.”

“Here’s a question,” Artemis says, “just...you don’t have to answer it, but I’m just putting it out there. Is there something else you’re not telling us?”

A worried silence falls over the room -- Kaldur inhales deeply and shakily and it takes a strong burst of courage to nod his head. It’s barely a movement, but it’s enough. It’s a start.

One day he will tell them about how he loves, but for right now, the most he can manage is this.

Artemis has an expression that says maybe, just maybe, she understands his struggle a little more than he’d thought she would. “Okay,” she says quietly, patting his knee. “Whenever you’re ready, we’re not gonna rush you.”

And, for what feels like the first time in long while, Kaldur exhales. He squeezes Artemis’ hand, and even though he can’t form the words to say his thanks out loud, he’s more than certain she understands.

“Number four,” says Conner solemnly. “What’s your favorite color?”

The rest of the game is full of laughter, and a level of familiarity Kaldur never noticed before. They joke easier, laugh more, and there’s no lingering tension in the air. It feels like home, and if he could, Kaldur would bottle this moment and live in it forever.

They talk until the early hours of the morning, and after it’s clear that no one’s getting up to go to bed, they dish out blankets and nod off one by one. Kaldur suspects he’s the last awake, until Zatanna nudges him gently with her elbow.

“One last question for you,” she says, barely louder than the quiet snores of their friends.

He simply hums his acceptance of his fate.

“What is really going on with you and Roy?” There’s no judgement in her voice but Kaldur still has to force himself to relax his shoulders. She sounds curious, not teasing, and maybe a little protective.

Maybe it’s because he’s so sleepy, but he chuckles for a moment, unbothered. “I wish I knew,” he says. “But between you and me? I hope he never asks for his shirt back.”

“I wish I was recording that,” Robin whispers, scaring the pants off of both of them. “You’re definitely gonna deny that in the morning.”

“I have no idea what you are talking about,” Kaldur replies, stone-faced.

Zatanna begins laughing so hard she may very well start choking, and Robin only manages a hapless shrug before leaning onto Wally’s shoulder. “Don’t worry, I’m a patient guy. Artemis was on the money; take all the time you need, pal.”

He’s not sure if Robin is joking, but regardless, he feels an immense weight off his shoulders.

And he sleeps like a goddamn baby.

#Young Justice #kaldur #roy harper #kalroy #kaldur x roy harper #I DONT KNOW WHAT THEIR SHIP NAME IS NOW AND I DONT CARE this takes place in s1 anyways so whatever!! whatever #not proofread #fic

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myfirelight64 · 6 years ago

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Chanbaek Lyric Analysis

So I saw some people on Twitter talking about lyrics similarities recently, so I did some digging myself and found there are actually a lot of parallel lines in Chanyeol’s lyrics. Obviously it’s been said before that it seems like he’s writing about one thing, like he’s experiencing it currently, with one muse, rather than just writing a random love song using past experiences. It’s all a bit delulu and all a bit of a stretch, but here goes nothing. The first three points are the main ones, with some extra at the end that are a little more likely to be coincidences.

**Note: All of the songs mentioned were written by Chanyeol, unless stated otherwise. There’s some CBX thrown in there because I find the similarities interesting; I heard Baekhyun helped out with the album? They mentioned in a livestream that they all took part in making it. Whether he put lyrics in for or about Chanyeol or Chanyeol somehow did it (or it’s merely coincidence) I just wanted to put all and any similarities in EXO’s music.

1. Angel

You Are is the first song with an angel reference (from what I can tell, released a year later on March 5, 2016.

“Perhaps you are trying to hide

Your wings and many charms that I don't know of behind your small shoulders“

Heaven is the second mention, released three months later, on the EX'ACT album, June 9, 2016.

“I’m sure you have wings hidden behind your back

Anyone can tell you’re my angel“

2. Being unable to sleep or think of anything else

Heaven also mentions the inability to sleep missing/thinking of the person he’s singing about.

“Even when I close my eyes, I can’t sleep

I spend the entire night with thoughts of you”

Confession (with Yesung) was released on April 19, 2016, also almost a year after Heaven.

“I keep thinking of your smile, it’s unforgettable

I’m full of your thoughts“

“It’s common that I dream about you at night

I lost count“

You Are touches on the same subject.

“Thoughts of you fill my mind“

Sweet Dreams (Blooming Days, not written by Chanyeol):

“Why are the nights so long?

Why can’t I fall asleep?

I think I’ll stay up all night like this“

“I’m happy whenever I think about you

I don’t know why I’m acting like this“

3. “Smiling without reason/without knowing”

Heaven:

“I keep laughing for some reason every night“

You Are:

“I don't know since when I keep smiling more without knowing“

Confession:

“Lately I’ve been laughing for no reason

It’s common that I dream about you at night

I lost count“

“I’d be sitting

And I’d think of you out of nowhere

And like an idiot I keep laughing“

Bonus - Touch It (I heard Chanyeol was credited on the song? Not sure for what exactly):

“But without knowing, I’m falling for you”

4. Stars

Heaven:

“Hello angel, you’re like a painting

You’re all I see when I look to the skies

City street lights, even if the lights go out

And the moon disappears, it’s bright because

I have a star that fell from the skies

And it’s you“

Confession:

“You are the most beautiful star I’ve seen in my life

If you are there shining

In this world, if we can be together“

Vroom Vroom (this, as far as credits go, was not written by Chanyeol, however, as pointed out by @chanyeoloving on twitter, it has a very similar key theme and is also Baekhyun’s favourite song of the Blooming Day album):

“The starlight falls from the night sky

But there’s a light that shines the brightest

My heart goes vroom vroom vroom

To you, vroom vroom vroom”

5. Work

It's a recurring point that whoever they’re singing about is the best thing to see after a hard, long work day, and we all know it seems like idols have the longest, hardest work days more than anyone.

You Are:

“I spend all day working hard daily to make money again

Why don't I feel sick of it, I'm only enjoying it“

Let Me Love You:

“Even if my days are long and boring

When I hear your voice

Everything becomes okay“

Vroom Vroom:

“Every day, it’s the same people

Having meaningless conversations

My eyes and ears and heart all play separately“

Playdate:

“It was an especially slow day today

But I got through hump day at the thought of you“

**Note: Chanyeol was 19 when he debuted, so I doubt he had a job where he would be ‘working hard daily’, which says these songs are about a current relationship.

6. Holding Hands

My most delulu theory, and my shortest. Obviously, pretty much every singer sings about holding hands at one point or another, but what I noticed was the almost exact same wording.

Confession:

“I want to hold your hand“

You Are:

“I just want to hold your hand”

That’s about it so far! Some of them are admittedly a stretch but I thought the comparisons were really interesting when they were mostly written by one person over a long period of time (Blooming Days was released April 10, 2018, which is almost two years after the earliest similarity in 2015). This fits perfectly into my mental timeline. If Chanbaek is real/in a romantic relationship, it seems likely that they began properly dating during 2015 until now. If not...I don’t know how to explain this lol (or their cumulative $10,000 bro rings). Feel free to ask me any questions if my format was confusing or if there’s something you’re unsure about! My ask box and messages are always open.

#i know im delulu but this is cute #btw i find it easier to begin posts if y'all ask me about something #i love talking about chanbaek sooo....#chanbaek #baekyeol #chanyeol #baekhyun #analysis

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cecilspeaks · 6 years ago

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130 - A Story About Us

This is a story about us, said the man in the radio. And we were pleased, because we always wanted to hear about ourselves on the radio. Welcome to Night Vale.

This is a story about us. We live in trailers out near the car lot, next to the house where the angels reside. We live in homes near a poorly secured library, hiding and shivering, fearing an escape. We live in apartments below heavy-footed neighbors. We live on streets, removing ourselves from a world that refuses to learn how to love us.

At night, we can see the red light blinking on and off on top of the radio tower. A tiny flurry of human activity against the implacable backdrop of stars and void. We sit out on the steps of our trailer, on the balcony of our apartment, on a bench in Mission Grove Park, on a tree swing in our yard. With our backs to the brightness of the moon, watching the radio tower for hours. But only sometimes. Mostly we do other things. This is a story about us.

We eat together in the Moonlite All-Nite Diner. One of us is philanthropist Thomas Charles Fleming, who once caught a hog and showed it to a local radio host, who happened to find hogs adorable, and just wanted to pet one and speak in high-pitched voices to it, and name it Gary or Dolores, and listen to its snorting breaths I order to feel alive. Especially on that particular day, where that radio host’s intern forgot to buy coffee. Anything to start the day with a charge.

Thomas Charles sits in the Moonlite All-Nite eating his skirt steak, and he begins to choke. We are alarmed, because we feel empathy. Selfish, selfish empathy. We feel our own necks (cease) up. We hold our hands to our own throats gently, choreographed mimickry, a moder dance around the themes of mortality, as Thomas Charles heaves forward gasping, his eyes bulging. We look to the OSHA-mandated choking assistance poster near the cash register. We begin to recite the instructions to each other and demonstrate the moves required to complete this life-saving (--) [0:04:34].

One of us, dinosaur expert Joel Eisenberg, stands and wraps his thin arms around Thomas Charles. Joel pulls his hands into a central fist under the victim’s sternum. Joel yanks his hand back and up, and we shout, “Harder!” and some of us shout, “Softer!” Thomas Charles thinks of the new Night Vale botanic gardens he created. His mind wanders to the pride he felt opening this cultural institution, and secretly, the guilt he feels about the frightening people he partnered with to fund it.

He knows he must warn us, but does not know about what, exactly. In dying, we often find that the lists of what must be done evaporate, and there is nothing left to be done, and there never was. Needing to do this was an illusion we built to keep ourselves busy.

We panic in our efforts to free Thomas Charles’ esophagus. One of us, Laura, a waitress in the diner, breaks off a heavy branch that is growing out of her hip, and begins poking Thomas Charles in the chest. We frantically fumble for our phones typing in “Heimlich Maneuver”, all unsure how to spell it. Some of us saying, “It’s H-I-E”, others saying, “H-E-I”, one of us even saying, “Manoeuver has an O in it somewhere, I’m sure of it”. We find an article headlined “Save a Choking Victim with One Surprising Move”, but become frustrated by the amount of pop-up windows.

Thomas Charles grabs a pen and a napkin and scrawles a single word. We argue about what exactly it says. “Maybe he wrote ‘swan pups’”, we say. “That’s not a word,” we reply. “What about ‘sound-roos’?” we interject as we stare at ourselves wondering who would think that made any sense. “You know, like children’s pyjamas made from audio frequencies,” one of us says. “It could work,” that same one says to the quiet room, then continuing: “as a technology startup, like an app on your phone that makes…” before trailing off, running out of words to protect the judgmental silence. “Oh it’s a great idea,” we all agree in order to ameliorate the situation. And we pat Thomas George on the back to congratulate him on his multimillion dollar idea of audio-only children’s sleepware. We think for a moment that it is this companionable swat of the choking man’s ribs that will finally free the steak from his throat. We have read enough short stories to know that this is a sensible narrative resolution, requiring an unforeseen solution to an impossible problem. And given that we are hearing our story on the radio, we know that this is the perfect culmination of a tale about a collective we, a coming together, a climactic comradery.

But it does not work. Thomas Charles sinks to his knees, eyes wet and resolved. In the commotion of choking hazards, clickbait, and startup dreams, we fail to notice two men who have entered the diner. One is not tall. One is not short. They are not part of us, so we know that this story is not about them. The one who is not short moves Joel Eisenberg aside and then grabs Thomas Charles’ shoulders. The one who is not tall punches Thomas Charles in the stomach, as a piece of beef shoomps out of his mouth, a rope of spit and a soft weeze tailing it. the piece of unchewed meat arcs perfectly into a waste basket, and we cheer. These strangers saved a man we barely knew. Thomas Charles inhales loudly and finally shouts, “It says ‘stone crops’. Stone crops!” “Shut up,” says the man who is not tall. “Come outside,” says the man who is not short. “Please,” Thomas Charles pleads. “I’m sorry I told them about stone crops.” “Everyone is sorry you did that,” says the not-short man. “This is not how I wanted to spend my day,” says the not-tall man. We hear the radio describe two men of indistinct heights, walking another man out of the Moonlite All-Nite. We hear the man on the radio describe a muffled pop of a handgun from the parking lot, the slamming of a trunk, and the fading Doppler effect of a vehicle speeding away.

We sit in our booths, poking hashbrowns with spoons, imagining we heard a car backfiring instead. We leave the diner and find a blood stain on the asphalt by our truck, or our sedan, or our motorcycle, and we pretend it is a spilled drink.

Let’s have a look at the Community Calendar. Last Saturday at noon, we all went to the Botanic Gardens, for the opening of the new exhibit called (Sedum Fields). One of us who is a dosent at the gardens named Halla Darwish, explained to us that these succulent plants are excellent for private gardens, as they are affordable, easy to maintain, beautiful, and require little water. Sedum are often referred to as “stone crops”, Halla tells us before it means anything. She then thanked Thomas George Fleming and an anonymous benefactor for funding the Botanic Gardens.

On Monday, we attended an emergency press conference at the site of City Hall, where no mayor currently presides. Before an empty mic, reporters asked questions and then tried to transcribe the occasional sounds of wind and crickets onto their notepads. One of us, Pamela Winchell, uncharacteristically tamped down her usual bluster and allowed someone else to speak for her, in this case the incidental sounds of nature.

On Tuesday, we took a longer than usual lunch break to go look again at the Sedum Fields exhibit at the Botanic Gardens, and we saw the sunny summer blooms, which are elongated pink tubes billowing at the top, looking ready to burst. But in the middle, there are asymmetrical bulges, like small crouching humans inside. A dosent who was not Halla Darwish, and who was not any of us, and who was neither tall nor short, told us to look at another plant. These were not for us. As we got back into our vehicles, cranberry spinach salads with sesame vinaigrette only half eaten, we caught a glimpse of this new dosent plucking the unopened blooms and placing them gently into crates. We heard one of us on the radio say this aloud, as we scattered back to our desks and counters and warehouses and trucks and kitchen.

This has been… a… oops. That was last week’s Community Calendar. Well, this has been Community History.

Disturbed by the presence of the men who carry crates, who possibly kill philanthropist hog catchers, and who hurry us through our garden visits, we anxiously eat our daily meals. Absent-mindedly do our jobs and mutter angrily during showers about our own inaction in the face of brutality by those who are not us. “We are people of action. This is a story about us,” we say aloud in unison from our couches. We stand and walk and look at each other in the streets and join hands. We join hands and sing. We sing “Angel is a Centerfold”, because some of us had just attended a minor league baseball game and could not rid themselves of the sexist earworm. We walk past the Scrublands and the Sand Wastes to the edge of the desert, and we surround a cargo truck filled with crates. There are two men, neither tall nor short. They do not move.

One of us, who is a sheriff named Sam, places the men under arrest for the murder of Thomas Charles Fleming. The man who is not tall says, “He was not the man you thought he was.” The man who is not short says, “Do they still have HBO in the abandoned mine shaft out of town?” “This is not a story about you,” we shout. “This is a story about us.” Sam places the two handcuffed men into a white police car with “Undercover Police” with bold lettering across the sides, and a stylized rhinoceros holding a night stick painted on the hood. We turn to each other and celebrate with smiles and eye contact. Diane Crayton tells Nazr al-Mujaheed: “We saved our town.” Nazr groans and does not respond. He has talked little in recent months. Susan Willman tells Simone Rigideaux: “What a happy ending.” Amber Akini tells Wilson Levy: “This is a better world now, Wilson. For our son.” She pats her belly, and Wilson begins to cry. Steve Carlsberg, who can sometimes be a killjoy, but whose intuition is not often wrong, says: “Look! The truck!”

We look at the truck. “This is not a story about a truck,” we say, as six-foot-long pink blooms burst from tiny crates. They stumble and squirm, like humans swaddled in plastic wrap, toward us, under a clear predictable afternoon sky and in the face of terror.

The last thing on our minds is the weather.

[“Space and Time” by Joseph Fink]

The protagonist of a story must have agency, must use their skills against their antagonist. This is a story about us, and so we actively confront our predicament.

Nilanjana Sikdar attempts to communicate with the beings. They make no noise. Pamela Winchells shouts at them through a bullhorn, but they do not react. Josh Crayton changes his physical form into a great white shark, but they show no fear. And he finds it hard to breathe on land, so changes back into a hummingbird. Henrietta Bell throws her co-worker, Sarah Sultan, who is a fist-sized river rock, at the creatures but they do not flinch. 16-year-old Tamika Flynn loads a crossbow with an explosive-tipped arrow, and we question our lackadaisical weapons laws in this state.

Overwhelmed, we back against each other, surrounded by the writhing featureless beasts. A flower monster reaches out, its arms stretching, elastic under the petals and touches former mayor Dana Cardinal. Another touches Harrison Kip, and another touches Leann Hart, just as she reaches for the hatchet she keeps in a waste holster.

The top of the flower opens up, and inside it is you. Yes, specifically you. We all recall many years ago, there once was a story about you, right here on this radio station. Now your eyes are open, but empty. Your face swollen and teeth shattered in places. Part of your right ear is gone. And we remember you died in that story. We all felt bad. But here you are, again, inside a flower, staring crooked and blank at our screaming faces. Another flower opens, and another broken face of someone who once lived in Night Vale. And another, and another. And as the last flower opens, the face of Thomas Charles Fleming emerges, his head split right where his hair once parted. This lips in the final hiss of an S, like a man whose last word was “stone crops”.

Sheriff Sam returns with the two men and releases them from their handcuffs, ordering them to take those monstrosities away from here and then come back to be arrested. The men gently lift each writhing bloom into the back of the cargo truck. They say nothing. We ask: “Who are you?” They say nothing. “What are these crates?” They say nothing. “These are people you have killed.” They pause briefly, but say nothing. “Are the crates always filled with bodies which are also flowers?” The men shake their heads no. The man who is not short says, “We are only doing our job.” “And what is your job?” we ask. “We handle the crates,” says the one who is not tall. “Are you hiring?” says Trish Hidge, who recently lost her job at City Hall. “The Botanic Gardens are closed to the public,” the not-short man says. “It is better that no one involve themselves with this,” the not-tall man says. They climb into the truck and drive away with their broken crates and human flowers.

We look at each other, relieved to know we completed another day, alive and together, but bereft of solutions or answer. “We have defeated gods!” we say. “And dragons!” we say. “And librarians!” we say. “And despotic corporate overlords!” we say and kind of high five each other about that one in particular. “But these men,” Missy Wilkes says. “Maintenance men,” Leann Hart says, already writing a story in her head. “Mafia,” Sheriff Sam suggests. “They’re kind of cute,” Michelle Nguyen says, as her girlfriend Maureen nods in agreement. “Not everyone gets to know everything,” we tell ourselves. “We have limitations,” we say, stumbling upon a new truth. “And when we know what we cannot know, we can believe whatever we want.” “Flower mafia,” Sheriff Sam insists. “Cancer is actually more inexplicable and frightening than those men,” Lorelai Alvarez says from great and terrible experience. And we sigh and, yeah, collectively nod. Culminating in a town-wide understanding that we not only touched the sky, but pushed against it. We know more about what we cannot know, and we are less afraid, even if we are still quite afraid. But in a productive, positive way. Like knowing not to put hornets in your mouth. We learned this, all together. Tough luck about you, though. Hope you’re doing OK at the gardens, I mean it didn’t look like you were, but we do wish you the best.

We walk to our homes, turn on our radios and hide. And we listen to a familiar voice say: “This has been a story about us.”

And we are pleased, because we always wanted to hear about ourselves on the radio.

Good night, Night Vale, Good night.

Today’s proverb: Anything is a piñata if you hit it hard enough.

#weclome to night vale #wtnv #wtnv transcripts #episode 130 #a story about us

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draftno9000 · 6 years ago

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Lady Gaga’s Enigma: Inside the outside.

"Music is essentialy twelve notes between any octave; all any artist can offer the world is how they see those twelve notes.."

It's an understatement to say that Las Vegas is one of the most important cities for the music industry and entertainment, to the visitors it offers endless sources of multiple activities that take the daily routine and stressful daily life pressure away and bring lights, fun and even gambling to the table. But in this case, the city specially takes music performances and concerts to another level. For years, the streets of this city in Nevada kept in their hearts the talents of enormous and really iconic legends as Cher, Celine Dion and Mariah Carey, (just to mention some of them) and made them look like they were a gem needed of perpetuation and admiration that attracted millions of followers to one single place. On an artistic way, we should consider Las Vegas residencies as a museum of the most emblematic artists that are not afraid to build a mind-blowing show that could easily overshadow their scene domination and vocals skills.

On March 2018 Lady Gaga made official her Las Vegas residency starting on December 2018 until late November 2019, with a total of 74 shows. As the name was published, 'Enigma' quickly created a hot burning fuss around her loyal fans and set the record straight on aiming to give a premium quality show. As months went by since the show announcement, Gaga flashed on social media a bunch of pictures and videos that were able to get into the followers minds and grow inside the seed of high expectations and enigmatic elements that would make the attendants gasp and ask for more. It was already clear that the main objective was already fulfilled: entertain. But the game-changing factor about preparing a full pop concert for months is to go further than the expected.

It's really important to remember that music labels bet more than money on letting one of their artists sign an exclusivity contract with a single venue or hotel as Ceasar's Palace or MGM hotels when there are hundreds of safer reputation-linked options for an artist career. A residency is an ultimate risk: it could make a whole career that took years to be stablished among thousands of other singers or bands look like a forgotten artist ready to farewell, or add a priceless milestone to the ongoing performer.

As the main doors for general admission opened at 9:00 pm on December 28th for the opening night, Gaga's crew had already made a fucking big statement by letting people witness a breath taking simple stage that could only make you wonder: What is this? in a good way. When you hear 'Gaga' you can think of a million ways to descrive her, but I think the most accurate and simple word to break her down is: crazyness. Which is not helping her at all. Even if she wanted to sit on a chair with brown hair and make everyone shiver on their seats with her un-taming vocals, everyone would be asking for more. Because we're at Park MGM in Las Vegas, you'll demand to make every penny spent on your ticket worth it.

The lights turned off and a flying- full of light and mirrored-suited Lady came down the ceiling with a keytar attached to her guts and her hands, ready to unbelt a nailed opening track: Just Dance, followed by general public recognized bangers as Poker Face and LoveGame. At this point you already owe money to the backstage work made to wow you. The perfectly fitted outfit, the theme-according electric blue wig that remains flawless through original choreographies, and the sassy-attitude dancers beg for more than your attention, your live-experiences passion.

As the 'Venus' performer quickly changed her look from weave to heels, a set of fan-favorite hits were about to play. 'Dance In The Dark' refilled the fan base's hunger with a live perfomance of a song that she didn't sing since her 'Monster Ball Tour' on 2010; full of energy and obscene pop dance moves Gaga gave her little monsters the flashback moment of the night. As 'Beautiful, Dirty, Rich' and 'The Fame' blasted the speakers for a 5,000 crowd, the attendants were singing along to memorable non-single lyrics but the critics went to the doubt point as wondering if they were a wise choice to include on the setlist, which personally I think it wasn't.

With only 5 studio albums, an original soundtrack and 21 official singles, it gets complicated to dismiss songs that most of the people awaits and include long-time forgotten and underestimated tunes to bring a spin to the expected. 'Telephone' made the cut by closing the second act of the show while 'Applause' got to open the next one with no big excitement along. Choices.

The whole 2 hour show is narrated and story-told by 'Enigma' a digital high technology character that interacts with Gaga through the interludes and give an unnecesary story to the experience. As we know, the thin line between giving meaning to a concert's concept and making it hard to understand, was crossed with Gaga's abduction into another kind of paralel universe. When alienated Gaga is flying on a metal orbit above the crowd while singing Paparazzi we couldn't help but to enjoy the obligated awaited song and ask for more. But then, it happened.

The awkwardness swallowed the crowd into Gaga's versatility as writer, singer and performer while she sang an epic performance of ARTPOP's opening track Aura while her black-leather corset pushed her vocals and body moves to her finest. '..Enigma pop star is fun..', right?

Nobody asked, but she gave us anyway a recipe for jaw-drops: First, get back on stage while riding a metal-aracnic robot. Second, play a fake-german non-single for your most loyal fans: 'Scheisse'. And last but not least, rock a metalic and futuristic styled outfit that lights up your boobs while you command everyone to dance and sing their lungs out. Period. And, as a hardcore pop enviroment was flotating in the air, 'Judas' started playing hitting the high notes and a violent role-play for almost 4 minutes. For the third song of the act production could have wrote *Madness* on the setlist instead of spelling the track's title 'Government Hooker'. At the end of the segment comes a cover of David Bowie's 'I'm Afraid Of Americans' as a friendly reminder of two essential Lady Gaga's components: legends as inspiration and a political message hidden underneath colossal synths.

I will always stay true to the belief that when you have an integral timeless pop hit as 'The Edge of Glory' or 'Alejandro' all you need to do is sing and dance your talents off and you'll get to a most memorable moment on the attendant's memories than a full of props-already expected performance. The MGM Park venue bowed down to sing along the piano chords fully live played by Gaga while perfoming 'Million Reasons' and 'Yoü and I' with the tender and notorious comfort that she gives to every note just to achieve a moment of recognition that bleeds vocal maturity and passion.

The night was almost done when a latex-styled, blue-wiged and fearless Gaga performed her 10-year career anthems. 'Bad Romance' set the room on fire with an explosion of pop mixed with nostalgia just by standing alone underneath a bright light dancing it's iconic choreography that's been kept on our minds through the years. You don't need to be a fan to recognize that those dance moves were born with the melodies and brutal lyrics that made this tune a hymn. The encore wouldn't be as satisfying if she didn't put 'Born This Way' at this precise moment to remind once again that she's come a long way by staying true to her beliefs and fighting for them.

The last song threw us out off the deep end while Gaga performed 'Shallow' along a black simple shirt that belongs to her first moments on the industry and a squicky-clean-mirrored piano to reach the already legendary high note that everyone can now sing to make your emotions shiver and open your senses to a melody that will now, last forever.

Just as her versatility and mind-blowing open-hearted talent, there is no conclussion here. Enigma takes all the little things you expect it to be and bury them on the heated Vegas floor to make you understand that you just witnessed a well-thought show built around 21 songs that tell a story and make a statement that this is not retirement show, but instead, a big moment on the entertainment history in a city where anything can happen.

#lady gaga #journalism #enigma #las vegas #pop culture

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fadeintocase · 6 years ago

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i'm not fucking around anymore 6-2-18

this is not gonna be an every day thing i imagine. that's fine. i'll let it find its rhythm.

i'm gonna talk more about about the wave and rhythm philosophy and how it lets you get a better grip on overall habits.

Basically this is going to be the start of a lot of whimsical musical analogies for self improvement.

so, personal upkeep. I’m back to eating one meal a day, though i cheat and have snacks a little to early or a little too late sometimes. Smoothing that wrinkle out.

I’ve tried bulletproof coffee a few times, recently on a day I ate nothing else. I felt physically very good and energized, much lighter, but just a bit too caffienated for my liking. I might swap coffee out for black tea and see how that tastes with butter and coconut oil instead.

The short “Sun Salutations” yoga thing from that app Fabulous actually opens up more of what I need to in a much shorter amount of time, so I think i’m going to stick to that nightly, and do a longer class like once a week.

Same with their morning workout. It’s doing well for me so far. Lets hope I can keep this momentum up.

Of course dishes piled up a few times while i was working on a track for patreon, but I knocked those out on my first free day and that felt incredibly satisfying. There’s nothing that resets your head quite like a clean apartment.

Intervals and Harmony

This has to start with some music theory talk. These are bare basics, don't worry.

So. A sound is made up of waves. A Tone is a wave with a sustained frequency. Meaning, there's a relatively fixed number of waves per second for the duration of the tone.

an A in western music is turned to 440Hz. That's 440 waves a second.

Music is made by combining tones in a scale. Intervals in a scale, that is, amount of tones up the scale from the root, have different qualities and roles in the melody. They combine with the root in different ways to form chords.

They find their origin in overtones. When you play a note, there are implied tones that are generated with it. Think of a circle of people singing. A few people singing one note will produce the sound of other harmonic tones within the mix of their voices. Someone joining could easily find the tone of the harmonic and fill that gap with a voice. This is what happens mathematically.

The most absolute combination of intervals, the 2nd harmonic, is the octave. It's the same tone but with double the waves. A 2:1 ratio of wavelengths. Brighter.

The second, most perfect actual harmonic interval, the 3rd harmonic, is the perfect fifth. This is a ratio of 3:2. It sounds perfect. Solid. But also open. Clear. It's known as the "power chord" and for good reason. Amplifying a fifth gives a sense of authority, it draws a lower undertone an octave below the root tone as well. But that's getting into the weeds a little too much.

The 4th harmonic is another octave. The 5th harmonic is the major third, a 5:4 ratio.

A happy and pleasant interval. Balanced.

Combining a tone with the 3rd and 5th harmonics give you a major chord. And that's neat.

Polyrhythms

Lets zoom out a little more. So we measure oscillations in a second as waves. There's another kind of frequent oscillation in music. Rhythm. Rhythm is just a steady impulse with a fixed amount of time between repetitions over a duration of the rhythm.

When you combine different patterns of pulses over each other, you can get a groove going.

If the rhythm is relatively based on sets of regular pulses, this is called a polyrhythm.

So there's simple math behind what harmonies sound good to us. Is there also simple math for what polyrhythms sound good to us? Turns out. It's the same.

youtube

Oh. So what feels good to us as humans are pulses along these mathematical ratios, no matter how far the space is between them.

Of course, you can find a lot of this stuff in my music. Like Sleep's strumming pattern and the stacatto tail the violin does are based on a 5:4 polyrhythm. (Which fits along the theme of there being an inverted open G5 thru most of the chords, when the key is E minor, to create a hollow expectation of major that only resolves through the other chords moving through it. That and the polyrhythm are asking for a major chord which never lasts more than a bar.)

Now you may understand that harmony extends beyond just audible notes.

Cosmic Cycles

Lets zoom out a little more. Oscilations over a period of time is a wave. Mathematical interplay between these oscilations is an interval. You know, the solar system is all cycles and oscillations too.

This site here does a thing where they take the orbit or rotational periods of celestial bodies and double their frequencies over and over until they get an octave of the tone audible to humans. Keep in mind, same tone, just an octave of it.

I'm not really interested in using these for like meditative healing or whatever, but what i'm interested in is the interplay between some of these.

For instance, the Earth year and the Synodic moon form an interval just wider than a fifth. Moving the result they come up with down 2 whole hz gives you damn near a perfect fifth. An approximation of a 3rd harmonic. Since the perfect fifth's quality is that it's perfect, you can't expect nature to get all the way there.

Consider seasons. That's just 2 octaves up from the earth year. That's the 4th harmonic.

If you add in the platonic year, the procession of the equinox, which is the result of the push and pull of the sun and moon on the earth's tilt, you get a major third from the earth year. The 5th harmonic.

Well would you look at that. So it turns out, when these oscillations interplay around earth, the overtones they generate are the harmonic series. And guess what came out of that pleasant major chord? Us.

The first cycles life had to work with were the rising and setting of the sun, the tides, and the seasons.

Human Cyclical Examples

Since you're part of this cosmic song and anything you do expresses within the context of that cosmic song, you can zoom out and consider your physical presence to be an instrument. And instrument that you are playing, taking cues from the universe to make sure you're in tune.

So, if you ever do something once a week, you're approximating a 4th Harmonic from the lunar cycle. If you ever do something once a month, you're approximating a perfect fifth (12th harmonic) from the year.

There's about 3 months a season, too, giving us a 1:3 harmonic with the seasons, an octave-stretched perfect fifth.

We wound up with a 7 day week. A 7:4 ratio happens to be a harmonic 7th. A leading tone. This is the note that makes the dominant 7th chord. The Jazz/Blues chord. It makes sense to add to a major chord, but introduces a subtle tension that wants to pull it to something else. This is the eternal feeling of the day to day grind. It's there in the waves. As you grow up you can either feel lightly tense at things not being perfectly resolved all the time, or you can learn to like jazz. I'm not too into jazz yet.

Habits & Cycles

This is the philosophy i stick to when i want to build habits. It allows me to visualize my life in a way that takes the intricacies of day to day interaction and makes them a song you recite and perform. It allows you to live from your ideal self and to map your physical self's activity to try to reach it.

You do things weekly to keep yourself grounded. Usually rituals like church or shit you meet up with your friends and do.

Things you do daily keep yourself moving forward, it projects a leading tone for you.

At least that's what i've been working with. Remembering the simple beauty of the harmony of the universe is invigorating to me. It makes me want to sing along with the cosmos.

Anyway, sometimes you need that feeling of something higher and more pure to keep yourself driven. It's why AA meetings tell people to find a higher power. Most people envision their god as a benevelent creator. In the context of our physical universe, my god is a major chord.

Anyway, I’m off to the farmers market.

Keep Climbing!

bonus batshit video

#INFAA

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