#i used to draw like this when i was younger and more insecure over my art looking bad or wonky

[sixtyt-en]

evil art style thing attempt

[clubdionysus]

[BAD DECISION #17] Jeon Jungkook

warnings: WELL WELL WELL. mentions of the red witch. post-gym kook. questionable conversations that shouldn't happen between friends, totally normal touching of genitals to prove points in aforementioned conversations, kitchen escapades, whiny koo <3 titty worship, spanking, titty sucking, fingering, a lil mutual masturbation, cockwarming (or at least an attempt!), unprotected sex, jk on top, the starluvrs are bad at maths!, multiple positions (prone bone my beloved <3), he finishes on her back, lovely stuff!! just friendly tho!

a/n: the header image is another lost relic, but this time i can't even remember the base photo </3

soundtrack: just a little bit - enhypen

wc: 11.2k

bd total wc: 540k (ongoing)

AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI

The soft cotton duvet cover on Jeongguk's bed welcomes you back far more warmly than it really should do; like a 'hi, honey, welcome home' , or an 'I've missed you'.  

It's fitting that the inanimate objects of his room carry such benevolence, when he himself is an open log fire on a winter's night. Warm, warm, warm is Jeon Jeongguk, and you've been cold, cold, cold for so long that the sudden heat is almost jarring.

That's how you justify the obscure feeling in the pit of your stomach when Jeongguk starts talking about blind dates, and how he always wanted to go on one when he was younger.

He reckons that the only reason that he hadn't was because he's 'a simple man of simple pleasures'.  

The hoops he needed to jump through to get a blind date - quite simply just asking someone to set it up for him - had been too challenging. You've alleviated that stress for him.

"See," you smile, folding his bird back up and tossing it over to him. You're both on his bed, staring up at the flock of birds still soaring above you, just out of reach. "We're fulfilling a childhood dream. You are getting something out of this whole deal."

You don't look at him, but you know he rolls his eyes and smiles when he does so. "Never said I wasn't, Disco Ball."

He's met with silence as you glance over at him. It's not an unwelcome nickname, but it's one he doesn't use too often these days. Always calls you Byeol.

"What?" he asks and he turns to face you when you don't reply, but you say nothing.

The more you let it simmer, the worse it gets. He's not called you Disco Ball in so long. Part of you thinks he's reducing your friendship. Addressing you like he did when he didn't know you too well. Creating distance. Forming space on a featherdown quilt that draws you both in like quicksand. He'll have to try harder if a wider margin is what he's after.

It's stupid, 'cause you know the name comes from a place of affection, but it makes you feel insecure.

"We'll still be friends, right?" You ask a little quietly. Jeongguk's brows grow taut, a slight frown forming on his features. Doesn't understand where such a question has come from. "If you get a girlfriend, I mean? We can still be friends?"

Jeongguk's skin is hot. Prickly. An automatic response to discomfort - but then his lips soften into a kind smile. Despite the offence that could be taken from you asking such a question - thinking so little of him - he's not naive to the way in which you work. He understands. People you've loved have left when things got inconvenient for them. He's been through it, too.

And so the walls that want to come up in defence are kept at bay. He doesn't let them rise. Instead, he meets you at the shores.

"Yoongi invited you to dinner," he nudges your shoulder. "Tae is practically in love with you for all the help you've given him. Dionysus relies on you drinking the bar dry every other weekend to keep it afloat. We couldn't stop being friends even if we tried."

His answer should satisfy you, yet your mind is marred by the same thought repeating over and over: Hayun probably used to get invited to dinner, too.

You aren't naive. You know his friends are just as kind as he is. They'd have welcomed anyone Jeongguk deemed important into their social circle.

"What about Hayun?"

Jeongguk frowns. "What about her?"

"Well," you say slowly, looking back up towards the birds, not wanting to watch his reaction unfold on his features like a letter of commiseration.

Before you can even articulate a reply, Jeongguk stops you.

"Don't. It's not the same. Hayun... That situation was different. Things were different. Plus, she's still my friend. Our friend. All of us. She just lives in a different city, that's all. The only reason she isn't around is because of proximity. We're still friends. Just like you and me are still gonna be friends. We've no reason not to be."

The situation is different. You're well aware of this. You've known Jeongguk for all of five minutes; she was a much more permanent fixture in his life. They had a history that you wouldn't even be able to comprehend; private jokes, and stolen moments when they thought their friends wouldn't notice. Their friends. Not just Jeongguk's.

She'd been as much a part of the friendship group as Jeongguk had been; the only difference was that she'd moved away. If she hadn't, would there even be space for you in their lives? Would Seoyeon be desperate for there to be another girl around? Would Jeongguk have felt just as fondly towards you? Would he have noticed your disco ball eyes in the dark of Dionysus or would he have been too busy searching for her in a crowded room?

Or would the time spent on you be spent on her instead?

The thought is unpleasant. It weaves its way through your bloodstream like a needle with dark red string threaded through its loop. It scratches and stabs at your insides until it breaks through the flesh of your bottom lip. Sews your mouth shut. Stops you from talking; from screaming how unfair you think it is that you're being equated to someone who destroyed him.

You don't think she deserves to be thought fondly of, but if Jeongguk knew that, you'd be the one he thinks negatively of. He leapt to her defence without you even starting an attack.

"Friends don't hurt their friends," you say quietly.

Life doesn't work that way. People hurt the ones they care about all the time - or at least you use that reasoning to comfort yourself whenever Seokjin shows up just to let you down.

"She didn't mean to," he replies. "I'm the one who caught feelings. I'm the one who misread things. She stayed the same. My hurt? It's on me, Byeol."

There's a sincerity to his voice that absolves her of blame; makes her innocent in whatever transpired between the pair of them. You know that you only have Jeongguk's side of the story, and even that is sparse and limited due to his reluctance to talk about it in any great depth, but you feel like you don't need to hear her side. He got hurt. That's enough. Your mind is made up.

Hearing him defend her so freely unnerves you. The feeling crawls beneath your skin and gnaws at your flesh. Reduces you to skin and bone.

You're silent, because you know that anything you do say will come across as mean, or as if you dislike a girl you've never met. It'd only make Jeongguk defend her more and like you less. You don't want that - as if Jeongguk wouldn't rip Seokjin to shreds at any given opportunity.

Trouble is, you can't blame him. Jeongguk has seen the impact first-hand. Wiped away tears caused by the man himself.

Hayun is just an enigma; a name rarely said, but often felt.

"What's gotten into you?" Jeongguk smiles, trying to downplay the heaviness of the atmosphere that's engulfing you both. "You're forgetting how annoying I am. You'd probably be thankful if we stopped being friends."

Though he's just teasing, you're worried that he does think that of himself. You don't want to be soppy though, so instead, you use one of his most often said phrases against him.

"I think if we stopped being friends I would simply die."

It earns a laugh. He nudges your shoulder. Tells you that you really gotta stop stealing his catchphrases and the things he does.

"Oh fuck off," you laugh. "What else have I stolen?"

A whole host of things.

"The mirror thing," is all he says, noticing your confusion immediately. He reaches over and tenderly clasps your chin. Doesn't notice the tiny gasp that gets caught in your throat - or if he does, he doesn't mention it. Turns your head, so that you're looking at him, and says " 'watch'. "

You close your eyes and smile. Nod. "Ah. That. The mirror thing. "

"See," he smirks, not that you can see. Your eyes are still closed and they'll remain that way until you decide you're no longer embarrassed. "Told you that you copy me."

"I don't copy," you smirk right back, despite your firmly shut eyes. Jeongguk likes the glitter you're wearing today. It's golden-hued. "Just a fast learner."

"Oh yeah?" he says, a laugh catching in his throat. "Watcha learnt about me?"

You whisper now, a little smug. "That you really like mirrors."

"Yeah," he concedes far more quickly than you expected him to. He turns his focus back to the birds on his ceiling, though you think he's gotten a little closer to you. "Yeah, you're right about that - but you know why I like them?"

"Pray tell," you grin, vaguely aware of the fact the conversation feels far more flirty than it really should.

"You do this thing," Jeongguk says, as a hand rests by his crotch. He's not hard, but he is a little firmer than he should be.

It's just cause he's thinking about sex. Thinking about the sound of it. The sound of you . The sight of it. Of you . The scent of it. You . Not the taste, 'cause you've not given him the luxury of that yet. He doesn't really register the fact he's pressing down on himself. Gripping. Feeling .

"It's that first look," he continues, voice dulcet. "It's like you can't register what you're seeing. Your eyes go all wide, and you look at me as if you're too nervous to look anywhere else. Dunno. Lets me know how much you like what I do. Bit of a power trip, I guess. Always gets me."

"Gets you what?"

"Hard."

The declaration is so brash that you can't help but giggle. "You hard now?"

"Thinking about it isn't the same as seeing it," Jeongguk admits, turning his head towards you - but your eyes are still closed, a smile plastered all over your face. He finds himself smiling, too. 

"But I mean..." He toys with your hand. Draws it to the top of his thighs. Gives you the chance to pull away. You don't. "Feel for yourself."

You whisper his name. 

He whispers right back. "What?"

"You know what," you tell him, as if your palm isn't right where he left it, and as if your grip isn't as firm as his cock. 

"What?" he teases again, feigning indifference - and then he fucking tenses. Moves his hips. Pushes up into your palm. "It's just anatomy, B. Nothing new."

Maybe not, but that nickname? That feels new. Feels like the opposite of him calling you disco ball earlier. Makes your breath hitch. Has him smirking as he looks at your lips. Bites down on his own. Knows this is trouble, but thinks he'd quite like to get in some.

See, you're the determined type. Once you set your mind to things, you do them. He's witnessed it first-hand multiple times. The second he mentioned the art cafe to Tae, he knew you'd make it happen. It's what you do.

And so he knows that you're setting him up that blind date whether he likes it or not. He knows you're gonna choose well for him. He knows, come this time next week, there'll probably be a moral complex that comes with the birds hanging above the pair of you.

But he's not ready for that. Not yet. 

There's so much to do. 

So many birds that haven't been set free.

A pleasant little hum vibrates in his throat as you palm the firmness beneath his sweats. His hips pulse. You daren't open your eyes - especially not as your thumb brushes against the waistband of his trousers. He hums again. Pushes his shoulders down into his mattress. Adjusts his body. Edges closer to you. Says nothing as your thumb sinks beneath the elastic of his sweats.

It doesn't go anywhere. You wait. His hips pulse.

"Swear you get off on torture," he purrs. 

"You're the one who started this," you murmur, trying to feign indifference, knowing full well that if he mirrors your hand position, he'll feel just how easily he gets you all riled up. "You're a sadist."

He just smiles. Tells you he's no such thing. 

And so you tell him to keep his eyes closed. Reach for his hand. Say, "Let's compare."

"Compare?" He husks, as if he doesn't know what you're doing. 

"Mhmm," you hum, bringing his hand dangerously close to your pussy. "Compare. You're getting off on torture. Maybe I am, too."

"We shouldn't be doing this," Jeongguk says, and yet as you loosen your grip, he's the one who lets his hand trail up your thigh. He's the one who strokes at the fabric of your sweats. He's the one who cups your pussy with his hand.

The top you're wearing has risen up a little, a small sliver of your stomach exposed - and then his thumb is caressing against it. 

His touch is warm, but the little gasp he does? The stutter of his breath? Oh, it's hot . So fucking hot.

"We're not doing anything," you say so sweetly that he'd believe it - or at least he would if it wasn't his own damn hand slipping into trousers. A breath hitches in your throat, and you can hear the ethereal way a laugh stutters in his throat.

"Just friendly, yeah?"

You nod. Whimper a pathetic confirmation - and then he's pressing against your underwear. Is slow as he rubs a single circular motion against you. 

"The birds are judging us," he tells you. 

"Nah," you shake your head. Take a shallow breath as he circles against you once more. "This is just revision."

"Revision?"

"Making sure we've learned from them. As long as - fuck ."

"You good there?" he teases, as if he didn't just up the speed for a moment. 

You ignore his question and continue the point that was so rudely interrupted by his pacing. "As long as we only do things the birds have already told us to do, then I think it's okay."

The pair of you are silent save for your tepid breaths. Jeongguk's fingers caress against the lace of your underwear while you palm at his excruciatingly hard cock. 

It's all rather juvenile, the way you're just touching each other up - and yet it's got your heartbeat racing. Perhaps it's because it's something so simple. Feels like there's so much more that could come of it. The great unknown: will you make Jeongguk cum? Or will you just blue ball him instead?

He really fucking hopes you'll choose the first option.

"Y'know," he says quietly. "I kinda need a shower."

It's not a lie. He freshened up at the gym, but didn't have a proper shower - didn't think he'd be taking such a long detour home.

"You wanna go shower?"

He nods. "Please."

It's laughable, really, the way neither of you says a word as he guides you to the bathroom. It's a regular occurrence at this point. 

You glance across the open-plan living room as you make your way to the bathroom, and smile at the painting hanging up beside the television. Jeongguk follows your gaze and smirks. 

"Think a future girlfriend would have an issue with that being up on the wall?"

"Maybe," you shrug. "You never have to tell her what is it, mind you. Never have to say it's... yanno."

"No I don't know, Byeol," he teases. Grips onto your shoulders to stop you from walking, and turns you to face it. Walks you both a little further into the sitting room area. Tilts his head, and you realise there's another bloody mirror in the corner of the room. You've never noticed it before. Wonder if he placed it there deliberately. "What is it?"

You narrow your eyes in the mirror. A smirk rests on his pretty lips and you can't help but bite down on yours when one of his hands creeps up your shirt. The bra you're wearing is lace; underwired but with unstructured cups. He squeezes. Fucking groans. "Shit."

"We shouldn't be doing this here," you tell him, well aware that Jimin could come home at any minute. Even going for a shower together is a risk. 

Jeongguk shrugs. "Doesn't matter."

"What if Jimin-"

"If he comes home, he comes home," Jeongguk cuts you off as he continues playing with you beneath your shirt. He wants it off. Takes it off. Faces no opposition from you. Both of his hands cup at your chest, the black lace sin beneath his hands. Your heartbeat heaves in your chest, and it's only made worse when Jeongguk nudges his nose against your hair and whispers, "maybe I'll just show him how to make you cum."

You tell him he's mean. He squeezes harder. Makes you whimper. Tells you he can be mean if you really want him to be.

But you shake your head. "Play nicely."

It's not that you don't like things a little rough and tumble - it's just that if this is the last time, you know it needs to be intimate. How else will you be able to face your fears with other people if you never even let him?

One of his hands trails to the back of your bra, and gently unsnaps the clasp, before ridding you of the lace. As much as he liked it, he likes you bare better. Likes the way your pillowy breasts frame your nipples perfectly. Likes that the soft flesh spills through the gaps in his fingers. Likes how easy it is to get you whimpering as he rolls your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

"Nice enough?" He husks.

"Nice," you nod, eyes closed, crown of your head tipping back to rest against the top of his chest. "God, Gguk. Think I'm obsessed with the way your hands feel."

The compliment makes his heart fucking race .

He watches in the mirror. Studies the way your lips part as he toys with you. Wants to kiss you so badly. Knows he can't. Fuck . Maybe he does get off on a little torture, but this is just inhumane to him. You can feel how hard he is as he presses into the small of your back. The curse and blessing of sweatpants. 

You reach behind yourself to palm at his crotch, and are met with a nod of his head against yours. 

"Fuck, B," he whines as you toy with the outline of his cock. "I gotta - fuck - I gotta do something with my mouth. Wanna kiss you too fuckin' bad."

He doesn't even mean to admit it, but now that he has, he feels a little shameless. If he can admit that, he can admit anything. 

Maybe he'll tell you about the wet dream he had a few nights ago, and how he'd woken up to damp sheets and a ruined orgasm all because you'd made an unexpected appearance in his dream. 

Maybe he'll tell you about the fact he hasn't watched porn in weeks. Just thinks of you, instead.

Maybe he'll tell you about the fleshlight hidden in the back of his bedside cabinet drawer, and how he can't use it anymore, 'cause it doesn't look like you do.

Doesn't look like you, doesn't feel like you, doesn't smell like you. Doesn't get him cumming like you do. 

Actually, maybe he won't tell you about that last one - but he wants you to know. 

Wants you to understand just how fucking sexy he thinks you are. Wants you to acknowledge that if he can get this wrecked over you, then there must be hundreds of other men out there just the same as him. You don't need to linger for so long on your ex. 

There'll be another guy out there for you who doesn't make you feel like shit; who only ever wants to make you feel good. So good. So, so-

"Oh God, yeah," he whines as you finally slip your fingers beneath his waistband and into his trousers. His hips pulse, wanting more, more, more of you. "So fucking good."

"My lips," you husk as his fingers dig into your soft chest. The grip is tight. Needy. "They're off limits."

"Lips," he nods. Clenches his jaw as he tries to control his breathing. Swallows his nerves down. "And the rest of you?"

You open your eyes to find his already on you in the mirror. He's hungry. Wanting. Salivating. He looks fucking primal, as if he's fighting every instinct he has just to keep your boundaries respected. Makes you wanna break every single one of them down.

Turning your head ever so slightly, just so your nose can nudge against his, you realign your faces. His lips are pouty. Pink. Pretty. Perfectly out of reach. Yet when you nod, they brush against yours tenderly. You don't let it happen again. "Be specific."

God, his cock is too fucking hard to be playing games like this. He wants to curse you out. Wants to be fucking mean. Wants to tell you to stop being a little bitch and just let him have his way with you - but he promised he'd play nicely. 

"Every inch of your skin," he says, 'cause he is actually a little too nervous to ask so politely for what he really wants.

Has been wanting it for weeks.

It's something new, to him. Something he's only ever asked for once, and it was in the heat of the moment. A moment quite a lot like this.

You smile. You know what he really wants. "That's not specific."

"But it's the truth."

Jeongguk always gets a little like this when he's riled up. A little needy. Whiney. You'd be a liar if you said you didn't enjoy it, but you know that sometimes he misspeaks. Says things he never would do if he wasn't desperately after a release. 

You never think he's lying, but you do think what he wants in the heat of the moment isn't always what he wants with a clear mind. This is one of those moments.

You purr, a little satisfied with how easy it is to get him like this. Feels like you're in control - so Jeongguk rolls your nipples between his fingers again to get you moaning. Realigns a sense of power. It's endless with the pair of you; a back-and-forth of control. It works well. Too well.

But he's feeling brazen, now. Feeling bold. Isn't nervous to tell you what he wants anymore, because the way your body reacts to his touch lets him know that you'll like it.

"Your tits, Byeol," he says. Your eyes fall to his in the mirror. He's looking directly at you. Notices the way your chest begins to heave a little heavier. Smirks. "If this is my last chance to..." he pauses. Is almost ashamed of what he wants.

"Last chance to what?" You flirt.

You bitch. You're teasing him just because you can. It makes him throb. The motion of your hand stroking above his underwear is making his cock all fat and leaky. There's a damp patch on the front of his briefs. He's ready to fuck. Wants to fuck.

But before that? Before he can even consider sinking himself into you? 

He (regretfully) pulls one of his hands away from you, bringing it to meet your hand in his trousers. He (even more regretfully) pulls you away. You pout. He smiles. 

"C'mon," he says, pulling on the hand he's just removed, leading you into the kitchen area. Will clarify it for you later.

The boys have an island that acts as a divider between the two spaces, which is exactly where he's taking you. The clothes he took off you are left by the sofa, his mind focused on one thing and one thing only: leveraging you into a better position.

You yelp a little as he dips to pick you up, gripping the back of his neck without hesitation. 

"Don't be a pussy," he grins, popping you down on the island counter. "Although now I come to think of it -" he lifts you again, getting to your feet. The way his mind darts from thought to thought, and how his body acts upon them without warning, makes you laugh. He sinks his finger into the waistband of your sweats. Pings it again your skin. "Off."

"Say please," you demand, just to be a little difficult. 

"Please."

"Please what?"

"Please," he says, eyes dark as he towers over you, his hands coming to cup your chest once more. The man's obsessed, you think. If he could read your mind, he'd tell you that you're correct. He is. "Take your trousers off."

"Why?"

God, he hates that shit-eating grin of yours. Hates that he can't kiss it away. 

And so he decides he's not gonna entertain it any longer. He grabs your hips. Spins you around. Bends you over the island, a single hand gripping the top of your thigh, the other pressing down between your shoulder blades. 

"What's the word, Byeol?" He asks, checking that you're on the same page.

"Chess," you reply a little breathlessly. This lack of control is something you're used to with him. He's never overtly dominant, always looking out for your needs first and foremost, but this feels... yeah this feels different. This is about him. 

And it makes you far more excited than you ever realised it would.

His hand trails down your back. Strokes at the line of your spine. He admires you. Takes note of the dimples just above your ass. Knows he's in trouble the second he starts squeezing at one of your cheeks. Still an ass guy.

He yanks the material of your sweats down past your ass. Fucking groans when he sees the black lace thong that sits prettily over your ass. Glances over to the bra by his sofa. Groans yet again. Yep . A matching fucking set. 

"Fuckin' vixen," he mumbles to himself, not really intending for you to hear it. Isn't sure if you had planned on getting laid today, but you're definitely dressed for it. As he grapples with the flesh of your ass, he notices just how smooth your skin is. Well moisturised. Coconutty. 

Maybe you had taken extra care in the shower that morning. Maybe you had shaved your entire body. Maybe you had been wearing a new two-piece.

That doesn't mean you were planning on letting him see. Just means your self-care routine is coming along fabulously. Well done you.

There's a bruise on the top of your hip. Jeongguk's thumb brushes against it. Doesn't apply any pressure. A small noise chirps from his throat, questioning it. 

"Pole," you remind him a little breathlessly. "Gentle with my legs, they're covered in bruises."

He nods to himself, and says, "Use 'chess' okay? Hey, look at me a sec - 'chess'. Okay? Even if it's just your legs. Don't wanna hurt you."

You're looking at him over your shoulder with a smile. His sincerity is sweet, but entirely misplaced. You want him to hurt you.

"Notice how there are no bruises on my ass?" you ask, to which he nods. You face away from him again, and sink back into the position he originally had you in, chest pressed to the counter. "Good. Change that."

He thinks he might cream his pants right there and then. 

"You're gonna fuckin' kill me."

"Oh no," you pout, voice all soft and sweet. "Wouldn't that be a shame?"

Jeongguk grapples with your ass. Caresses it. Knows you're not done talking, so is buying time. Wants to hear how you'll tease him. See how riled up it''ll get him. 

"If you die, I'll just have to fuck Jimin again."

The crack of his palm against your ass is electric. 

Your body jolts forward, Jeongguk's grip on your hip to keep you stable no match for the impact of his flat palm. Skin on fire, chest heaving, you giggle. That's all he's got?

"Y'know," you tease, and Jeongguk is pleased that you sound a little breathless. He strokes at the skin he impacted, soothing the sting. Likes that goosebumps are already forming. "He took me from behind, a lot like thi-"

He doesn't even let you finish this time before the sting of his spank is delivered. It's harder than the first one, but his hand is also far quicker to soothe this time around. 

"Yeah," he husks. "I fuckin' know."

You can hear his breathing, now. You're both panting a little. 

"Does it bother you?" you ask as he tenderly cares for your reddening skin. 

"Be specific," he speaks boldly, a little unlike himself, and you're starting to understand why he's an ass guy. Your tits make him weak. This? The way he's got control of your body? Makes him strong. 

"That I fucked Ji-"

The way he cuts you off with another domineering slap to your ass gives you his answer - but so does the way he not only soothes the skin immediately afterwards, but also how his other hand comes to rub the bottom of your spine, following the path of its curve. He's cherishing. Worshipping. 

He leans forward as his hand trails up your spine so he can reach your neck, and tenderly clasps it to he pull you back up. Turns you around. Is gentle as he lifts you back into position on the counter. 

Brushes your hair out of your face. Looks you directly in the eye. Uses this thumb to collect a rogue chunk of glitter from your cheek. Rubs it on his arm. Stains himself in you.

"It doesn't bother me," he says - not for any male sense of bravado, or acting 'chill' - but because he needs you to know it isn't a big deal. You've enough complexes as it is. He doesn't want you to ever feel shame for the things you've done. "Bothers me that he doesn't realise how lucky he was to get a pussy as good as yours. Bothers me he didn't finish the job. Bothers me that he actually got to fuck you," he grins. You grin right back. "But it doesn't bother me that it happened."

"Mm, so you won't share towels with him, but you'll share girls?" You tease. His hands toy with your chest again. Secretly, you think you like him better like this. Like it when he's weak.

"Am I sharing you?"

It's a loaded question, you think.

"Not right now," you whisper, reaching to his waistband, nose nudging against his. "Take these off."

"Say please," he whispers right back. One of your hands tangles in his hair. Pulls him away. Gets him looking into your eyes.

"Please."

How can he refuse? It's like you put him in a trance whenever he sees your disco-ball eyes. He'll do whatever you ask of him.

He takes his trousers off first, then says "shirt?"

You nod. He takes that off, too. Leaves them crumpled in a pile on the floor. Doesn't care for them at the moment. Only cares for you.

"I still need a shower," he says, as he closes the gap between you, your legs wrapping around his waist. 

"We can still get one," you tell him. Honestly, you don't really mind what you do with him. Just know that you wanna make it last. Want this feeling of safety and security for a little while longer.

His arms rest on your shoulders. Just a little taller than you in height when you're sitting like this, Jeongguk likes looking at you from this angle. Likes seeing the variations in your glitter; the small chunks and slightly bigger flakes that make you seem cosmic. He likes noticing the flecks caught on your lashes, and how he never realised quite how long they are. He doesn't think you're wearing mascara. 

You're not - but you did get your lashes done the week before. He wouldn't give a shit even if he knew. Would think it was cool, probably.

"So about that whole no-kissing thing-"

"Nope," you laugh, swatting at his clammy chest. He smirks. Presses his lips together. Shakes his head. 

And then he whines. "It's so unfair."

"If you even try, I'm yelling chess."

"Really?"

"Oh, yeah," you assure him - only for him to edge a little closer.

He's not actually going to kiss you. 

Although... if you let him, he might. 

"Chess!"

"Ughhhh," he whines again, pulling away. "So mean, disco ball."

"What if I promise to make you cum?"

He narrows his eyes. "Fine."

One of his hands drops to your chest again. Keeps on coming back. Can't resist. Ass guy? Yeah right.

The other drops to your underwear. Toys with the lace. 

"Bird revision, right?" Jeongguk asks. "So we can only do things we've already done?

You nod. 

"Okay," he whispers, before pulling away from you. "Hold that thought."

You watch as he walks around to the kitchen sink, his thick cock tenting in his underwear, desperate for something. Anything . 

And yet your birds? 

All focus on you. You've no idea how the fuck you're gonna get him cumming. Sure, there was the mutual masturbation one, but you'd promised that you'd be the one making him come. Maybe there's room for loopholes.

It wouldn't be the first time the pair of you have skirted the truth of what a bird could entail. A bird, a plane. Whatever.

Hands under the water, Jeongguk's focus is only on cleaning himself. He preens you so often, fixes your hair, your glitter, that it's nice seeing him in the same capacity but for himself. Realistically, it's all for you, still. 

He glances up. Looks a little bashful. 

The distance reduces the pair of you to your natural states; just Jeongguk and his Stargirl. He gazes at you often, but it's different when he's blinded by the light. With a little space, he's reminded of the fact you belong on this earth, too. 

It's like the pair of you are tangled up in a Jekyll and Hyde situation, instead, it's who you are when your clothes are on, versus when your clothes are off. He likes both of them. Doesn't think they can coexist though. 

"What?" he asks when you smile at him. You just shrug and shake your head.

"Weird isn't it?" 

He comes to stand in front of you again. Your legs don't wrap around him, but he does put his palms on the top of your thighs. Looks pensive as he asks, "What is?" 

He's grinning, too, though. His skin is getting all prickly again. Can smell your arousal. Wants to fucking drink it. 

"You 'n' me," you shrug, letting your arms snake around his neck. You're sat up straight, and the gap between your chests closes. "Like, I was maybe 15 seconds away from kissing you." The admission makes Jeongguk want to die. "But then when you were washing your hands..."

"I was just Jeongguk again, right?" He assumes. You nod. "Same for me. Like we're two different people: who we are when we're horny and who we are when we're 'normal'."

"So fucking weird," you laugh, deciding that it solidifies what a great friendship you have. Convince yourself it's gonna make it so much easier when he starts dating. If you can separate the Jeongguk you mess about with and the Jeongguk you're friends with, then there's no reason the friendship should be lost.

"Too weird to pick back up where we left off?" He says quietly. Nudges his nose against yours. Strokes his hands up your back. Pulls his chest away so he can sneak his hands to your tits once more. Squeezes. Makes you moan.

You shake your head. "Do it again."

He does. 

Is firm, as he does so, his large hands cupping your chest so delicately that you almost want him to be rougher - but you like it when he's gentle. Like how well he takes care of you. His thumbs stroke across your hardened nipples, toying at them, getting you all hot and bothered. 

You moan so subtly that Jeongguk thinks it might be his favourite sound in the whole entire world. 

"You wanted specifics earlier," Jeongguk says under his breath. "I can give you a specific."

You nod. Trail along his bottom lip with your thumb. Let him press his lips down against it. 

"Show me," you tell him. He squeezes at your chest. You know exactly what he wants. You also know he's never done it before. "My tits, huh? You wanna suck on them?"

He swallows harshly. Rests his forehead against yours. Nods. Can feel his cock throb. 

"Big boy words," you whisper, and are met with a slight grunt from Jeongguk. He's used to being the one in your position. Used to setting the pace, setting the tone. You switching it back around on him? Fuck. He might just die. Or cum in his pants. One of the two. Death would be preferable. "Tell me what you want."

He rests his head on your shoulder. Looks at your tits as he plays with them. 

"Not much of a teller. More of a doer."

He's just trying to weasel his way out of it. It's like the birds all over again.

"So do it."

And to your surprise, he does.

His lips are firm as he presses a kiss around your nipple. Once, twice. A third time. Poutier and poutier with each kiss. He's delicate. Sincere. Doesn't wanna get it wrong.

"Feels good," you tell him, knowing he needs the reassurance. 

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," you smile. Tease at his hair as his lips wrap around you again. The way his lashes splay on his cheeks is art, you decide. "You've no idea how much I like this."

His lips kiss and kiss. It takes a little encouragement - "use your tongue a little. Yeah. Yeah, like that. It feels so good when you do that. Suck a little- oh fuck. Yes." - but it doesn't take long for him to gain confidence. Be a little bolder. He focuses on your reactions. Notices when your breath hitches everytime he runs his tongue around your nipple. When he kitten licks, too. But when he sucks? That's when the jackpot hits. 

Your body leans into his touch, hand resting on the back of his head. His name escapes your lips half a dozen times. When he switches to your other nipple? Half a dozen more.

His lips are direct and purposeful and they tug your nipple into his mouth, his moans vibrating around you.  Pulling away, Jeongguk wastes no time. Has your other nipple in his mouth almost immediately. Squeezes your tits together, nipples almost touching so he can swipe fast licks across them. Gets you mewling. Whining. Begging for more. 

And how can he refuse? 

His hand dips to your pussy. Toys with you over the lace, which is sodden with your arousal. He slides your underwear to the side, and says nothing, just continues sucking on your tits as he sinks a finger into you.

"Shit," you curse. The angle you're sitting at means he can't get too deep. Means he's hitting you in just the right spot, straight off the bat. He mumbles something, but you can't work it out. Just know there's no possible way he's an ass guy. Hasn't spent more than a second away from your tits since he first started peppering them in kisses. "Just like that."

Your head lulls back, and Jeongguk finally pulls away. "You good?"

He's met with the most satisfied laugh he thinks he's ever heard. "Is water wet?"

"Dunno," he grins. "But you are. Fuckin' soaked. God," he stares down at your pussy, stuffed with two of his fingers. "I fuckin' love this cunt."

You smirk. Roll your hips as well as you can in the position. He watches, transfixed by the way he's stretching you out even with just two fingers.

"My bed," he rasps. "Can we? I know I need to shower, but - fuck - I just gotta have you in my bed, B."

Truthfully, you're glad. There's something about post-gym Jeongguk that just really gets to you. You think it's the pheromones. Don't care to google it because you enjoy the mystery. 

You nod. "Probably for the best. You have to eat off of here."

He smirks. Withdraws from you. Says, "So?"

And then he licks his fucking fingers clean. Eyes on yours. One of his brows tweaks. Challenges you. 

"You underestimate how much I like eating pussy," he says, as he walks away, leaving you in a state of shock.

You think his departure is for dramatic effect. In reality, it's just so you don't see the Cheshire cat grin on his face, pleased with himself for what he just did. He knows it was hot - but he's smiling because he can't get over the way you taste. Fucking delicious.

That thing about torturing himself? Yeah. You might be right. 

Eating pussy isn't on the birds. He knows he can't have it - and yet when you arrive at his door, mouth still ajar, both smug and surprised in the same expression, he thinks it might not be unfathomable. 

"What?" he feigns innocence - but he's got a grin that tells the tale of a valiant hero. He's so pleased with himself that you almost slip back into your 'normal' selves again - but then you crawl onto his bed. All fours. Ass a little red from his hands earlier, but no bruises. Just that barely there thong he thinks belongs in a museum, and evidence of just how turned on you are showing between your thighs.

The smile of his? Replaced with a stare so hard it rivals his cock. 

"What?" you feign innocence now, as you flop down onto his bed - and then he gets the luxury of seeing your tits and - fuck. It's all too much. 

He walks over to the bed. Takes off his underwear. You do the same.

"I'm gonna die," he tells you with absolute certainty. He's so ridiculous that you can't help but smile all fondly at him. The way he jokes and banters with you comes so easily, that part of you doesn't even realise he's naked. Part of you does, though. Mainly your eyes, given the fact they seem to be transfixed on his cock. "If we don't do something about this-" he gestures down to his cock, as if you need any direction "- then I absolutely will just die. Is that what you want? Huh?" 

"Mhmm," you hum, finishing it with a small giggle and a nod, reaching for his hand to pull him onto his bed. He lets you. Follows your lead, cause he hopes it's leading him somewhere good. "I want you dying a very little death."

The innuendo dances off your tongue and into his ear as you sit on his lap. His hands automatically find your chest. He decides he'll miss them. Encourages your body down. Positions you just right so that he can take your tits in his mouth again. He's a changed man.

"Don't think there'll be any little about it," he mumbles as he switches sides, kitten licking now so that he can finish his sentence. "Think it's gonna be a very big death, actually."

"Shit," you whisper as he gets reacquainted with your body. He decides all rather quickly that tits are a gift from God and he's been blind for his entire life up until he met you. How had he not been utterly obsessed before? He'll never admit it. Never. Will prevail as an ass guy - but fuck, he hopes whoever you set him up with has a good pair of tits.

But then there's an uncomfortable awareness of how fleeting this all is. By the time you've both finished, it'll all be over. 

He manoeuvres you both over. Kisses your chest, now. Works his way up to your collarbone. Your neck. Bites down ever so gently. Kisses again. Tells you once more how your no-kissing rule 'will kill' him. 

"Better leave me something nice in your will," you tease as he finally pulls away from dappling your skin in pretty kisses that you wished could have been on your lips instead. Either pair. 

He sits back on his heels. Strokes his cock as he looks at you. Tilts his head, a smirk rising on one side as you cup your tits. 

"Pussy," he encourages, pulling a little tighter on his cock. "Play with your pussy."

You give him a quizzical look, but do as you're told. Slide your fingers between your slick folds. Spread yourself for him. Watch as he almost fucking hisses. The pace he's wanking himself off increases. His breathing shallows. You think it stops completely when you sink two fingers into your entrance.

He curses. Tilts his head back. Ruts his hips upwards. Forces his cock through the tight grip of his hand. There's a sheen to his tip, precum leaking so delicately that you find yourself salivating at the sight of it. The muscles in his lower abdomen tense. He's edging himself. 

"How many birds do we have left?" Jeongguk rasps, eyes opening to find yours again. The way he speaks, all breathless and needy, has you wanting more. "Mutal masturbation's done. I can't... Shit. I can't. I'll cum if I carry on. Tits are done. Fingers, done. What else?"

"Shower," you say, then follow it up with. "Do that last. Water gets in the way. Wanna watch you cum."

"Shit, don't say shit like that," he mewls as he sinks down on top of you. His body is warm, the chain around his neck catching on your throat, pooling between your collarbones. Has you determined to make him finish on your chest. Wanna replace his chain with his cum. 

In a normal scenario, he'd kiss you right now - but he can't. Instead, he averts his desire. Grips his cock. Presses it against your folds. Spreads your slickness. Covers himself in it. Dips down a little too far. Curses. Gets you whining. 

"You know," he husks against your neck. "We could..."

"Cockwarm?" You simper. "Don't believe that one was my bird?"

The crown of his cock presses against you. Jeongguk holds it as the base, and runs it down your folds, then back again. He repeats. Lets his grip get even tighter when he lines up with your entrance. He waits for you to move your hips.

And you do. Just for a moment. Just a tad. Just enough.

"Wasn't it?" He hums, knowing perfectly well it was one of his.

"Don't even think it was a bird," you whisper a little breathlessly as he presses a little deeper against you. He adjusts his hips. Lines himself up a little better. Your breath hitches.

"So you don't want to?" He asks, and you can just tell he's got one of those smiles on his lips. The one that makes you think maybe kissing him wouldn't be so bad. "'Cause I wanna."

"Gguk," you whisper. He shakes his head.

"Not an answer."

"Shit," you whimper, rolling your hips ever so gently to encourage his tepid ruts against you. "Condom?"

"Birth control?" he chances. He knows you're on it. Think if he's gonna get his cock in you, then he's gonna at least try for it raw.

You know you should, and yet - "Are you clean?"

He nods. Asks the same back. You nod. Haven't hooked up with anyone but him since your last test.

Everything is out in the open. There's nothing to lose - just the knowledge that you'll maybe never get this ever again. It only serves to make you want him raw even more.

"You get a minute."

He pauses. "A minute?"

"Sixty seconds," you nod. "Cockwarming. That's all you get."

It's ridiculous, 'cause all you want is for Jeongguk to fuck you senseless. Think it's embarrassing admitting that, though. What if he doesn't actually want to fuck you? What if it's just for the birds?

"Who's counting?" He husks. Realigns himself. Presses the tip of his cock against your entrance. Plugs it but doesn't push forward. Makes you wanna die. Too good. Too fuckin' good.

"You are," you whimper, knowing you won't be able to keep count when he's inside you.

He nods. Reminds you that 'chess' is always an option.

His cock sinks into you slowly. It's thick and wide, angled just right to hit your sweetest spots. Jeongguk groans. Finds himself seeking out your tits with his mouth as he bottoms out. Sucks gently, until he's reminded by you that he needs to be keeping count.

He grins. Nibbles your nipple ever so gently, then nods. "You're right, you're right. Sorry. Shit. One. Two..."

Jeongguk finds solace in the crook of your neck as your legs wrap around him. The position has him thinking you've no right to ever complain about intimacy again. This is about as fucking intimate as it gets. And when your arms wrap around his neck? Dainty fingers start toying with his hair? Only amplifies it.

Your hips move ever so tenderly, and he loses count. Finds himself swearing again. You're tight and warm around him, just how he wanted it. Torture. Fucking torture. He likes this so much he fears you ruined actual sex for him.

"Shit," he mumbles against you. "Never been good at maths."

The way you giggle? Torture. Again. 

"You're a liar, Jeon Jeongguk," you whisper tenderly, tensing around him just cause you liked the way it made him whine.

He pouts and shakes his head, which is still buried in the crook of your neck. His voice is muffled as he asks, "What comes after 32?"

And because you're just as into it as he is, you decide lying is okay for the time being. "11."

"Yeah," he whines. "Thought so. Eleven... Twelve... What's next?"

"Dunno," you whimper breathlessly. It's getting a bit too much for you, too. "Maybe ten?"

"Ten," he echoes. Decides he wants to spend eternity inside you. "Eleven..."

He pauses just long enough for you to know exactly where he's going with this - so you beat him to it.

"Maybe it would be easier if you had a rhythm going?" you simper. 

"A rhythm?" He hums. He was just gonna pretend he couldn't do maths again.

"Like..." you pull your hips back a little, burying yourself deeper into the mattress and away from him - but then you push them back up. Jeongguk fucking whines. "One." 

You pull back, again. Jeongguk whines, again. Sinks himself back into you. "Shit. Two."

"I'm not good at multitasking," he says. Not a lie, admittedly. Gets distracted too easily. If you don't keep count, he'll just fuck you forever or something stupid like that. Doesn't think he'd mind it, to be honest. "Maybe you should keep count."

"Mhmm? You want me to count for you?"

"Yeah," he nods. "Count for me, B. Make sure I don't go over sixty."

"I'll count backwards," you tell him, thinking it will somehow take longer, because apparently all sense of sanity is evading you. Unsurprising. All you can think about is Jeongguk's fat cock and how it's keeping you spread open nice and wide for him. "Countdown." 

"60-0?" He clarifies, to which you nod. "Mhm. Do that. Count backwards. Use that pretty little head of yours."

"Sixty..."

The way he pulls out of you is maddeningly slow. He's deliberating taking his time. Overindulging. Making this last. He's even slower as he pushes back in, filling you up as deep as he possibly can.

You're barely able to get the next number out.

"Fifty-nine," you eventually manage as he bottoms out. "Fuck."

He's lethargic in the way he moves. Slow as he withdraws, and even slower still as he fucks himself into you.

"Fifty-eight..."

Jeongguk's skin is hot. He sticks to you like glue. Only his hips move - but so do yours. 

You're fucking. 

You. Are. Fucking.

And, God, you know you shouldn't. You know that it's a recipe for disaster, but Jeongguk's aftershave smells like safety and his bed feels like home, so the prospect isn't scary. 

"...Forty-two... Forty-one..."

Your whines are getting louder. So are his grunts. You grip onto his biceps, and begin to realise Jeon Jeongguk is not a man. He simply cannot be. Not when he is built like a Greek God, and looks like one too. Crafted from marble, there's no possibility he's real. 

And even if he is real, you think there's no way he'd actually be fucking himself into you like he is. 

Sex, at its very basic fundamental value, is all about survival of the fittest. Anatomy. Breeding. Shit like that; things you can't quite recall when he's balls deep inside you. It's about fucking for the survival of the human race, and out of everyone on the planet, you can't wrap your head around the fact he'd choose to do that with you. His basic anatomy would choose you . 

Jeongguk isn't thinking as intensely as you are. 

Fucking. Nice feeling. Cum. Nice. Inside her. Nice. Fucking. Real nice. Glitter. Nice. Tits. Suck. Nice. More. Fuck. Nice. Again? Nice.

But he is also thinking about spilling himself into you, and how fucking unreal it would feel. 

So maybe your brains are working in tandem. Different process. Same end goal. He just can believe he'd choose you, 'cause, well... he already has.

Eventually, you hit thirty-three, then thirty-two, and then -

"Shit," you whine. "That damn thirty-two."

"What about it?" He asks a little curiously. Pauses his hips until he gets the go-ahead from you again.

"I've forgotten what comes after it."

"Shit," he grins, playing along with you. "Start again?"

"Maybe," you nod. "But this time, maybe go faster? Might jog my memory?"

Jeongguk smirks. Sits up on his heels, cock still buried inside you, knees on either side of your ass. He grips your waist. Spanks one of your tits, then softly caresses it as an apology for letting the intrusive thought win. His hips pulse gently. 

He's fucking you. 

Jeongguk is fucking you. 

He lets the hand that was playing with your chest trail down your torso until it reaches your pussy. It's swollen and needy, just as much blood rushing to your clit as there is to his cock. His thumb presses down right when it needs to. Rubs in tiny circles as he gently thrusts into you slowly.

"Faster?"

You nod.

"Okay," he rasps. "Let's jog that memory of yours. You're so smart, Byeol. Look at you, and your pretty little head. So smart. So fucking smart when my cock's inside you."

This time you don't count. He grips your waist. Rams himself into you like a man possessed, lips resting ajar as his brows knit together all prettily like they did when he was eating brunch. So incredibly focused, and yet there's not a single thought up in that gorgeous head of his, just that he's fucking you so hard his neighbour will definitely be able to hear his bedframe hitting the wall. Good .

The noises he makes are lewd. You think he'd make bank with an only fans. Know that you'd pay good money for it. With a cock as pretty as his? A body like a marble statue? Gorgeous little whimpers when his cock is all needy for you? Yeah, bitches would go wild for him. 

Funny, how you refer to them as bitches, almost like you're jealous over imaginary women who'd find him sexy. Very strange, indeed. 

After all? You're just friends.

His pace eventually eases, and you pretend like you were counting the entire time. "Two... One... Times up."

Jeongguk sinks back down, hooking one of your legs over his elbow as he does so, opening you up even further. He wants to be deeper. As deep as he possibly can be. Wants to press down on your cute little tummy and feel himself inside you.

"Whoever fucks you next better worship your pussy," he mumbles, pressing kisses up your neck. "So fucking good. Shit. If you dare fuck another guy who doesn't make you cum like you know you deserve to cum-"

"You'll what?" you tease, a smile plastered all over your face. "Die?"

He laughs. Shakes his head. You know him so well. "What use would that be? Nah..."

Jeongguk pulls away from you again. Withdraws himself fully for the first time. Watches your pussy as your arousal seeps from your tight cunt and onto his sheets. Wants to lick it all up. Doesn't think he's allowed to, though.

Instead, he moves your legs, finally noticing the extra bruises from pole. You were right. They do look like watercolour bruises. 

He squeezes your thighs together and uses his gentle hands to twist your hips, so that your legs are curled to the side, but keeps your back flat against his bed. He lines himself up with you again. Grunts as he sinks into you. You're tighter now, like this. He thinks it's gonna make him cum. He has to go slow.

"I'd get you like this," he says, holding onto your hip and pushing deeper, deeper into you. He nods over to his desk and smirks. "And that chair over there? That's where they'd be. And they'd have to watch me fuck you how you like it."

He doesn't mean to, but he finds himself fixated on the fact you routinely have sex and don't finish. He can't wrap his head around it. He'd had the luxury of witnessing you cum a handful of times. Had felt it once. Knows first-hand how fucking good it is. Thinks about it as he fucks into you, now, then lets the intrusive thoughts win again as he begins to ramble.

"Can't believe how many people you've let get away without making you cum. You know how good that shit is? Fuck. You feel like heaven. They wouldn't even deserve to watch it - but I'd do it. I'd make them fuckin' watch - 'cause not being funny, B, but you should see yourself right now. So fucking hot I might die. Hopefully then if they fucked you again, they'd know what to do."

"Never realised you were such a good teacher, Mr Jeon," you tease.

He stills his cock inside you. Smirks. Shakes his head. Picks up the pace again.

You know what ' Jeon ' does to him. The ' Mr ' ahead of it? Yeah. Gets him.

And so gives you a friendly threat, as he fucks his cock a little deeper into your tight, warm cunt. "I will fuck you so hard my bed breaks if you don't shut the fuck up."

"Oh?" You grin, trying not to moan and failing miserably. "Would you prefer Sir ?"

"Final warning," he growls, his hips slowing but deepening. He's close. You know it's not gonna take much. 

"Whatcha gonna do? Give me a detention?"

"If you get to call me stupid fuckin' names, then I get to kiss you."

"Kissing isn't very friendly, is it?"

"Byeol, my cock is inside you."

"Yeah? Just a friendly fuck."

He knows you're joking, but Jeongguk doesn't think there's anything friendly about this.

He doesn't insist on kissing you any further.

"You're unbelievable," he smiles, easing slightly before reaching for your hand. "C'mon, let's make you cum."

"Oh? You want this to be over?" You flash a grin, as if you haven't been fucking him for God knows how long by this point, knowing full well he could have cum in 10 seconds flat at any given opportunity. He repeatedly edged himself for you.

"No, but if I don't cum soon, Byeol, I'll d-"

"Die, yeah yeah," you grin. "Alright. Put yourself out of your misery."

He laughs. Looks at you with such fondness that you think you'd quite like to orgasm on his cock for him like a good friend should. "You make me sound like such an asshole."

"I don't," you promise sweetly - before you also decide to let the intrusive thoughts win. "Also, just on the subject of assholes, thoughts on pegging?"

"Literally what the fuck is wrong with you," he laughs, rolling his hips to remind you of the more pressing things at hand. You moan a little, but all you wanna do is banter with him. You enjoy it. Like it when he's all hard and needy and impatient, and you're winding him up. You like frustrating him. 

"You've got a nice ass," you shrug, shoulders pressed deep down into his white sheets. You look angelic, he thinks, hair haloing around your head, chest flushed, tits covered in teeny tiny hickies from his mouth.

"Well, maybe if you'd have picked a different plane..." he teases. "You'd know by now."

Holy shit.

"Wait. You wanna get peg-"

Jeongguk covers your mouth with his hand, a subtle grin on his pretty little face, dewy nose scrunching just for you.

"As much as I enjoy your chitchat, Byeol, I'm gonna fuck you so hard you can't talk at all. That good?"

You laugh. Twist your torso over to reposition yourself on your front. He gives you a playful spank straight off the bat, and it makes you roll your eyes - as if you hadn't turned over just to give him a view of your ass. You'd known what you were getting yourself in for.

Adjusting you slightly, Jeongguk pulls one of his spare pillows over, and lifts your hips to scoot it beneath you. It's his favourite position. Every last part of it. The way he can pull on hair and spank asses? The muffled moans into his pillows? Fuck . 

You love it just as much. Always helps to have your body weight adding to the pressure of your fingers massaging against your cunt. As Jeongguk pushes into you, he watches your hand slip beneath your body, and curses. 

"That's it, B," he husks. "That's a good girl."

He fucks himself into you - slow, deep, hard - and picks up the pace with every pathetic moan that escapes your lips. Tells you how good you sound, how much he wants to hear you come undone - and then you are.

The pleasure waves through you like an electrical current, Jeongguk's thick cock unrelenting as he fucks into you and drags your high even further than you thought possible. There's a numbness to your body, save for the overwhelming pleasure that pulses around his cock. It's all you can feel. Everything else is void. For a moment, the only important thing in your life is Jeongguk's dick and the way it fills you like nothing else ever has.

"Shit," he husks. "B, where?"

"Back," you just say, unable to move because your body is still fucking shaking. You don't even get the chance to mourn the loss of his cock inside of you, because he has to pull out so quickly.

His hand grips his cock and wanks faster than the speed of light. The pressure in his balls builds and builds and then it can build no more.

He squeezes your ass and whines as thick, creamy spurts of cum begin to paint your back.

The sound of his grunting makes you moan with every new rope of cum emptied onto your skin, and Jeongguk's pretty sure nothing in Taehyung's 'passion' collection could even come close to the sight in front of him. 

The final drops are wasted on your ass cheek as Jeongguk holds it to the peachy flesh, watching the way he stains your skin. Holding his cock by its base, he spanks it against your ass once, twice. Smirks. Takes a moment to squeeze your ass just because he can. 

He fucked you. He knows he should be concerned about the friendship, but he's not reached post-nut clarity yet.

Eventually, he flops down beside you.

"You know," you mumble, eyes closed, a smile on your lips. Jeongguk's grin is so serene that it's a good job your eyes aren't open. You might accidentally get your feelings confused if you saw him look that pretty. "I actually think it's a bit mean setting these poor girls up with you."

"What? Why?"

He sounds genuinely affronted. You just smile harder.

"Well, it's a bit cruel, isn't it? Us pretending like they'll be dating some great guy, only for them to later find out you're really average in bed."

He knows you're joking. Knows that a fuck like that could never be described as average. Plays up to your teasing just because he finds it funny.

" Average ?!" He exclaims. You can hear his smile in his tone of voice. "Nah, you're chatting shit just to piss me off, Byeol. What is it, huh? Want me to fuck you again? Want me to remind you exactly how average I can be?"

"Maybe."

He grunts. "Call me when you can walk straight."

"Pass me my phone."

"Fuck off."

The afternoon descends into casual chaos. You shower together, and bicker over who gets to stand beneath the water for longer, then battle it out for Jeongguk's fluffy towel in the aftermath. In the end, he lets you have it - only 'cause he likes the way you oogle at him when he's naked. 

You dry your hair, and style Jeongguk's into pretty little French braids. Tell him that he has to keep it like that. He says he will. By the time Jimin gets home, you're just sitting on the sofa watching shite TV. He's none the wiser you were naked on his kitchen counter a few hours earlier. Probably is best he never finds out about that part.

He studies Jeongguk's hair for a moment, then shrugs. "Suits you. What have you guys been up to?"

Good fucking question. 

"Not much," Jeongguk hums. "Gym this morning. Met this one -" he pokes you with his foot, earning a grimace from you. "- Afterwards for coffee. Been stuck to me like a bad smell ever since."

Jimin laughs. Shakes he his head as he comes to sit by you both with a box of dry cereal that he's eating straight from the bag. 

"You've got the most sensitive nose known to man," Jimin teases. "If you've kept her around, it's cause she smells good."

"Nah," he begs to differ. "Just gone nose blind."

"Prick," you laugh, then ask Jimin about his day. 

Conversation takes place of the shitty TV show, the three of you easily finding a million different topics to talk about.

It's times like this you regret ever fucking Jimin. Part of you fears you'll always just be 'the girl Jimin fucked that one time'. No identity within Jeongguk's friendship group beyond the fact you shagged his mate.

It's stupid. They barely remember Jimin even so much as looked in your direction. You're Jeongguk's friend. Jeongguk's.

Funny how you don't seem to mind being reduced to no identity outside of the confines of Jeongguk. Did you really heal after Seokjin? Or are you just making even worse decisions than you used to?

Thing is, Jeongguk's friends would be right in thinking that of you. 

You are his friend. 

As you head off into town the next morning to arrange his blind date, you know that's all you'll ever be.

And somehow, you think you're okay with that. 

AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI

[abyssal-author-and-artist]

oh shit i just realized i forgot to post the trans dipper essay

oh well, better late than never!

Introducing - Why Mason "Dipper" Pines is Trans and Why that Matters - an essay I spent more time on than I did my actual college project today

Mason "Dipper" Pines from Gravity Falls is trans. Trans masculine, to be specific. Do I believe this was intentional? No. Do I believe that there's a seriously convincing case to be made? Fuck yes.

So first off, he's just like me frfr, which is pretty compelling in and of itself. But that's not enough for a whole essay, so we move onto our second point - character designs. Dipper is designed like, well, like every modern-era trans man I've ever drawn who isn't goth. The shorts, the one shirt in the one color, the absolute insecurity. He even does the hunch of the back! Also, I think I heard somewhere that the vest is to make his shoulders look broader, which I'm not entirely sure is canon but I am accepting this whole-heartedly. It's such a trans move of him. He's too young (and it's summer so it's too hot) to wear a dysphoria hoodie so he picked a vest. (I say too young because dysphoria hoodies usually cover your chest and Dipper and Mabel probably haven't hit puberty.)

The second part comes directly from science. According to this article, and many others, sex in identical twins is complicated, but most identical twins will be born the same sex. There are cases where this isn't true (which might be the case for Mabel and Dipper) or they might be fraternal, which is also pretty likely. However, looking at them when they were younger (and listening to their very similar voices), it's likely they were identical and both girls. That's not to say I dislike trans Mabel - every trans woman I draw dresses like her, so I do love her being trans as well and them hitting the age of like. 10. and swapping genders is incredibly funny and adorable to me.

So, we can't reliably use the aforementioned evidence, then, can we? After all, identical twins can be different sexes, although rare, and we don't have any proof they are identical beyond their visual (and when they were younger, audible) similarities. Well, first off, I'd say that's pretty compelling evidence already. In a cartoon, especially one as detailed and beautiful-looking as Gravity Falls (the art is good and I will die on this hill), visual language makes up for a lot. And Alex Hirsh has gone on record saying that he very much wanted Jason Ritter and Kristen Schaal for Dipper and Mabel respectively, to the point where he would have canceled the show if Kristen hadn't signed on, so I wholeheartedly believe every character (with the exception of Grenda and any other characters who had last minute va's picked) had their voice actors picked very specifically. I can't find whether Jason Ritter voiced younger Dipper, though, so that's a dead end.

Now, that's all well and good, but it's a lot of visual language, isn't it? Why don't we move into something more based in the writing itself?

So the first and most prominent example of Dipper being transgender is the episode Dipper vs Manliness. You know it, you probably have emotions on it, it's the episode where Dipper is trying his hardest to be a man's man. The episode was supposed to be about toxic masculinity and how to be a real man is to stick to your morals. It's a good lesson and in my opinion, holds up even in 2024. Pretty good. Does a great job of what it wants to do. Now, Dipper vs. Manliness has been dissected to hell and back already as a transgender allegory, so I'll keep this brief: the episode centers around Dipper being mocked for not being manly. While Mabel and Stan still see him as a man, albeit an effeminate one, it gets to Dipper. He proceeds to do anything to prove himself a real man. If viewed as a trans allegory, Mabel is teasing her brother and not realizing how deeply it actually hurts him (whether accidentally because she fails to realize how insecure he is over it or because she hasn't been there before, depending on how you want to headcanon it). As for Stan, I like to pretend he's supportive but regularly forgets Dipper was ever a girl, so he makes a serious slip up because of that (and/or he's regurgitating stuff said to him. That hits harder if you also headcanon trans Stan, which I am warming up to). Dipper proceeds to try and prove himself a man, crying when he takes even one more blow to his self esteem/sense of identity as a man, and eventually gets comfort from his family when they realize just how BADLY they messed him up. He is affirmed as a man and the episode ends. Everything that can be said, has been said - including that you don't have to act toxically masculine - or even masculine at all - to be a real man. Remember this part, it will be important later.

So, other trans moments for Dipper come a little sparser. Dipper vs. Manliness is the example for a good reason. But still, there's other moments. The short Voice Over from one of the short story compliation episodes is another one that's commonly referenced as a metaphor for voice dysphoria. Yes, Dipper's voice is cracking in ways common for a cis pre-teen boy his age, but the pitch and tone of his voice can also be seen as his more feminine voice peeking through. Taking the potion can be seen as taking testosterone or other hormones. Granted, this falls apart when you consider that Dipper is later discouraged from taking the potion, because that could be read as Dipper being discouraged from transitioning, but on the other side of the spectrum, it could be read as Dipper being affirmed as a real man despite his voice. From that perspective, his family prevents him from taking (possibly dangerous) homebrewed hrt. Also, the euphoria he gets when it does change his voice is just. Absolutely adorable.

Now, my favorite resource for Dipper acting trans is in the episode Headhunters. He's asking Manly Dan questions and Manly Dan calls Dipper a girl. And MAN the discomfort on Dipper's face. He immediately attempts to correct Manly Dan, but is shut down and the episode moves on. I think that for such a short moment, it does a good job of making Dipper seem trans, though. He is called a girl and feels extreme discomfort around it. He does not like being called a girl. He is not a girl. But he's not shocked or surprised or even really offended - he's resigned. He's used to being called a girl. Sure, he hates it, but he doesn't cry or scream or anything. Sounds to me like a trans man who's absurdly used to being misgendered but still hates it. That pain never goes away, but sometimes all you can do is flinch in discomfort, try to correct and move on, like the episode does.

For a (mostly humorous) video of more of Dipper acting trans, check out this video.

So I think we've made a pretty compelling point for Dipper Pines being trans masc here. Looks pretty good, yup, this is a great essay, let's wrap it up. Oh? What's that? The name of this essay?

Why Mason "Dipper" Pines is transgender and why that matters.

Well, let's dive into section two of this essay - why does Dipper being trans matter?

Someone could easily say it doesn't matter. Just fun fandom headcanons, that's it, wrap it up now. Nothing more to say. Dipper is trans and that's just a fun reading of his character.

But I don't think that's the case. I think that Dipper being trans means so much - to trans fans of the show, to fans who have never seen or spoken to trans people before, and to queer fans of Gravity Falls and similar shows. (I personally am a Steven Universe fan who really valued the representation there, so Gravity Falls and all it's queer coding means a lot to me.)

First and foremost, I'm not going to keep you in the dark as to why you're remembering my earlier point. As a recap, it was this: Dipper vs. Manliness, and by proxy, Gravity Falls as a whole, says that you don't have to be traditionally masculine to be a real man. For a show that spends a lot of time mocking a kid commonly headcanoned to be a trans man, that says a lot, and a lot of stuff I think more people need to hear.

You do not need to act like your gender to be your gender.

You do not need to present like your gender to be your gender.

You do not need to fit some rigid box that society enforces to be who you are.

If you are a man, you are a man, trans or cis, regardless of how you act. (And the same goes for women and nonbinary people! You don't have to fit a mold.)

You don't owe anyone anything.

You don't owe people masculinity. (Or femininity or androgyny for that matter.)

I think that's part of the reason Dipper vs. Manliness ages so well. Dipper reads as trans, especially to queer fans, and his story in that episode tells us that we don't have to be someone we're not for people to take us seriously as who we are. At the end of the day, the really masculine thing is staying true to you - a sentiment echoed and reversed in The Last Mabelcorn, where the most feminine thing you can do is to stay true to yourself. I can't find it right now, but I could swear that there's a That GF Fan video explaining my point a little better. The point is, there's nothing that makes you more of whatever your gender is than staying true to yourself.

Additionally, if Dipper really is trans and someone sees themself in him, that can help them explore their gender or explain it to other people. Young kids who have never interacted with trans people before can see Dipper and grow up to connect the dots - or grow up to have him crack their eggs.

I know I'm new to the fandom and I was already out before watching the show, but he really helped me explore my gender. I like dressing like him - he's very relatable, even though I'm old enough to be in college now. I see him as a very anxious, slightly paranoid trans kid, and I see a lot of myself in him. He has a lot of issues, and a lot of issues that aren't trans specific but definitely hit harder when you are trans. He makes me feel seen on a level that I never thought a cartoon character could do.

Honestly, here would be a good place to put a rant about representation in kids media - queer kids under the age of 12 exist and struggle. I liked a girl (before realizing I was trans) in fifth grade, so about 9 years old. There are kids who experiment with their gender when they're younger than that. We're here and we exist, and every single time a character in children's media is made and is prevalent, another kid is able to really see themself.

That's really the point of this section. Dipper is trans. That matters. People - mostly queer kids but people of all ages - see themselves in him. He's here and we see him as queer because it's validating. It feels so good to hear Stan affirm him at the end of Dipper vs. Manliness, because it proves that at the end of the day, you don't need to present as super masc or femme or androgynous to be who you are.

Gravity Falls, through coding Dipper as trans, sent a message:

You are seen. You are loved. You are valid.

Thank you for reading this all. Trans Dipper means a lot to me, and I love writing him and seeing him in general. I want more of him because Dipper being trans means the world to me.

I love you all. Have a wonderful day. Remember to stay true to yourself.

[navybrat817]

Muse

Pairing: Artist!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader Summary: Bucky is thankful to have you as his muse. Word Count: Over 1.1k Warnings: Fluff, kissing, light insecurities if you squint, slight feels (it's me), Bucky Barnes and he's in love (and he’s a warning, okay?). A/N: Nix was kind enough to send me an old edit she made and I ran with it for @the-slumberparty 's Across the Universe challenge. ❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, but any and all mistakes are my own. Banner by the lovely @sgt-seabass and divider by the amazing @firefly-graphics. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

Bucky Barnes hadn't expected to find solace in art when he was younger. It seemed more like a path that his best friend Steve would take, though both of them appreciated expressing themselves creatively. Life also taught him that his road came with unexpected bumps and turns. Trading guns for brushes and pencils after he left the army, art helped him process some of his emotions he long kept at bay. It showed him how to look at life from a different perspective. In some ways, it saved him.

Like you did.

"Mmm."

The moan you let out drew Bucky's gaze up from his sketchpad, smiling softly as you stretched your legs out under the sheets. As tempted as he was to rouse you with his tongue, he decided to let you sleep since he already woke you once in the middle of the night. It wouldn't be the first time he sketched you while you slept.

The pad in his hand was already filled with drawings of you, but one more wouldn't hurt. Over the hours and days spent with you, he studied and learned your body well. He had other sketches and paintings of you in various angles and lightning. Those would never be sold.

Some art that existed was for the artist alone.

The pencil began to move across the paper once more when you didn't stir. If you woke up and caught him drawing you again, you'd shake your head and tell him he had more than enough. He disagreed.

There was beauty in his surroundings, but they paled in comparison to you.

"Bucky," you whispered, sending a shiver of excitement down his spine. Like the color red, you speaking his name invoked deep, intense passion within him. He saw hues in brighter shades thanks to you. "Come back to bed."

"I'm almost finished," he promised.

"You drawing me again?" you mumbled, bringing your hand up to cover your yawn as he kept sketching. "You have enough and I'm a mess."

"Maybe. Maybe not," he teased with a tender smile when your eyes opened halfway. "And you're not a mess. You're beautiful."

And it’ll never be enough.

"Careful, James," you teased back, arching your back as you stretched. "Keep smiling and sweet talking and they'll take away your brooder card."

"We can't have that," he winked.

When Bucky decided to pursue art outside of a hobby, he hadn't meant to become a brooding recluse on purpose. He simply preferred solitude while he worked and he valued his privacy. While he was encouraged to promote his work on social media to help build more clientele, he never showed his face. He let his art speak for itself. It worked.

It was how he came to meet you.

Before he met you in person, you were his favorite customer. You bought multiple pieces and left the kindest comments on his page. He often went back to reread them when he got lost in his own head.

"While there are many beautiful pieces of art in the world, Bucky Barnes gives us work that defines, and defies, beauty. His art can move you to tears or give you hope of brighter days ahead. We're privileged that he chooses to share his vision with us and one can only hope to see the world as he sees it."

He may have moved you with his visuals, but you moved him with your words.

"I have to meet her," he told Steve when you commissioned a custom piece.

Steve couldn't believe it since Bucky hardly ever let anyone into his studio. He said it was the least he could do for someone who consistently showed him support. He wouldn't admit at the time how nervous he was to meet you. Or why he felt so compelled to see the person behind the name since he refused to look for you on social media.

He realized that day it was destiny to meet you.

The artist and the muse.

"Back to bed," you ordered, moving the sheets back as he set his pencil and pad down. He used the opportunity to gaze along your naked frame bathed in the soft light, lingering between your thighs. "Please, Bucky?

"Who am I to deny my muse?" he smirked, slowly standing from his stool to stretch. His sweatpants hung low on his hips and he had thrown his dark hair up in a bun to keep it out of his eyes. "Especially when you look at me like that."

I'm littered with scars and you gaze at me like I have no imperfections.

"Have you seen you? You're gorgeous," you said, patting the mattress for him to sit.

“Not as gorgeous as you.”

“Take the compliment, brooder,” you said with a sleepy grin.

When he took a seat with a chuckle, you stopped him before he could lay over you. Instead, you took his right hand and had him stay in place as began to gently massage it. You commented more than once about how long and thick his fingers were and how warm to the touch they were against your skin. Working at his hand in tiny circles, you carefully rubbed out any tension you sensed. While you focused on the task at hand, he took another minute to gaze at you in wonder.

My beautiful muse.

"There," you said, kissing his palm once you finished.

"Thank you," he said, resting the same hand over your heart.

He watched and felt your chest rise as you inhaled. The steady beat grounded him. He was lucky enough for you to let him paint you with his love.

Inside and out.

"Do you ever regret it?" he asked as he traced a small heart on your chest.

Your forehead scrunched as you looked at him. "Regret what?"

"Choosing me," he whispered.

You had a chance to live a life of luxury and you walked away from it for me. Do you regret following your heart when you could've had so much more with him?

You exhaled as you pushed yourself up to face him and placed your hands on both cheeks, making sure he was looking into your eyes. "I will never regret choosing you or being yours," you whispered back.

Bucky's eyes softened as he smoothed his left hand down your back and dropped a kiss to your mouth. He lost himself in the feel of your lips and tongue, an exchange of desire he only got to experience with you. He didn't live a life of glamor, but he would forever give you a life of love.

"Now use me as your canvas," you said as the kiss ended.

Like Bucky said, who was he to deny his muse?

I love Bucky in love. Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[lady-griffin]

#ArcaneSeason01 | When and how did Jinx develop fishbones?

Thank you for your ask Anon!

I’m sorry it took me years to finally answer it, but at least I’m answering it the day S2 airs, so that’s something, right?

Also, I worked on this before S2 aired (before I watched it), so if something turns out to be wrong - oh well, I did my best. Again, sorry for the super late response.

Fishbones – The Idea and the When

This might surprise a lot of people since many see Fishbones as something Jinx specifically made for Silco, but the show’s details make it clear Jinx had the idea for Fishbones before she ever met Silco.

The main evidence being one of Powder’s drawings -

The bottom drawing depicts the very basic concept of Fishbones - a shark shooting a fiery blast out of its mouth with a bullet above it.

Fishbones is clearly a power fantasy of Powder’s, which makes sense. Violence was beyond the norm for her growing up and unlike Vi, physical hand to hand combat was not something she excelled at.

Now, her having this fantasy or dream weapon doesn’t make Powder some evil child who was always going to be violent, she was a kid growing up in a violent world, who wanted to be useful, so it makes perfect sense she wanted to have (make) this “ultimate gun” – especially since shooting was something she truly excelled at.

I would also argue, she has more of a desire to create weapons that are uniquely hers, rather than just weapons to hurt people. Because despite all her insecurities she’s always been confident in her own artistic and general self-expression.

Powder obviously admired her sister and wanted to be like Vi, but she never tried to be Vi. She pursued things she was interested in and even what she was good at, rather than abandon all of it to be more like Vi.

In many ways, whether as Powder or Jinx, she's always remained true to herself.

Her weapons, particularly Fishbones are arguably proof of that. As, the same drawing (or a near identical one) is hanging up in Jinx’s lab in ep. 4.

Indicating Fishbones is still something she wants to make, despite how much she's changed and is different from her younger self.

Bonus Material -

Additionally, we have a promotional image of what comes with The Collector’s Edition of Arcane, giving us a clearer picture of said initial drawing of Fishbones.

As well as the blueprint three of Jinx's weapons (including Fishbones) and her other drawings.

Her blueprints are interesting to me, because they’re this mix of childishness and sophistication.

There’s a lot of “maturity” in how the actual drawings are clean, concise, and well-made. They don’t have Jinx’s usual scribbling style or aesthetic, which is evidence of something I’ve always believed about Jinx – her art style is simply just that, her style of choice.

Mostly importantly these are blueprints; meaning Fishbones is no longer just the abstract idea of a shark with a fiery blast, but now an actual idea of a possible weapon to be used.

Now in general it’s hard to tell what specific age Jinx drew something because of her scribbly style, but I’m leaning towards her being on the younger side for these.

Though it's more than possible she made the blueprint of Fishbones after Silco took her in.

Nonetheless, Fishbones has been an idea of Jinx’s long before Silco entered her life - meaning he wasn't the sole for reason why she built Fishbones.

Fishbones - The Design (Inspiration and Reason)

Now, I do agree with the common consensus that Fishbones was made with Silco in mind, specifically his love for sea monsters – BUT he’s not the only one with a love for monsters.

If we pay attention to the details, it's obvious, Powder had an affinity for monsters as well, even a fondness for sharks specifically. 

Which is just the cutest thing ever.

Can you imagine how happy Silco was when he learned his newly adopted daughter loved sharks and other monstrous creatures?

I know that has nothing to do with your question, but I just can’t get over that. Seriously, imagining that scene is just way too cute.

Evidence of Powder’s Affinity Towards Monsters

Ep. 1 - Shark plushie

In ep. 1, we see a shark plushie right before Vi goes to comfort Powder. Now, either Powder made this plushie herself or it was made for her, but either way it’s obviously Powder’s.

It also looks very similar to the rocket she shot from Fishbones – the grin especially.

Act I - Powder’s grenades

Throughout Act 1 we see several of Powder's grenades and also hear her talk about them. Note how she designed them, she didn’t simply draw a cute little poro or dragon on them, she actually designed them to be little creatures themselves.

She goes even further, by giving them names and pronouns; which to me, shows how many of her weapons are meant to be their own little creatures, not just weapons.  

Fishbones is a great example of what I’m talking about – because he’s not a bazooka with a shark drawn on him, he’s an actual SHARK bazooka.

Plus, I’m using he/him pronouns instead of calling Fishbones an it, because of the intentional “life” and personality Jinx has imbued into this weapon, and also from how she interacts with him in other League media.  

Ep. 6 - Powder drawing monsters

Vi has a hallucination/memory of Powder drawing the monsters they made up to outdo one another, so even though Vi said she went too far at times and Powder got scared, clearly Powder loved their game.

Which, by the sounds of it, was solely made up with the purpose of keeping Powder happy and entertained.

Ep. 7 and Enemy (mv) - Powder's battle helmet

With its eyes and teeth, clearly her helmet is another one of her monsters. And again, we don't simply see a cute figure simply drawn on the helmet, instead what Powder did here, like with her grenades, is turn her helmet into its own little monster.

Another couple of tiny details

In ep. 1 - Powder picks up something from the trash when Claggor and Vander are leaving the Last Drop and it looks very similar to the teeth of her future chomper grenades.

Even if they're not the same - Powder she clearly saw something that resembled sharp teeth and kept it.

There’s also her clapping monkey toy and while that's not a monster, it’s still a pretty creepy toy.

In the S2 trailer - Shark hoodie.

I know I said I was only focusing on S1, but I couldn't not talk about her hoodie, because she's wearing a shark hoodie!

It’s interesting - because some say this is her fully embracing Silco and his legacy while others claim this her returning to being Powder once again, as she's wearing something similar to what she wore when she played with Ekko – with the markings on her cheeks and everything.

I think it’s 100% both of those things, while also just Jinx being Jinx – someone who has always loved monsters and sharks.

-

Now I genuinely believe Fishbones was a gift for Silco; it’s just that Fishbones was always going to be Jinx's weapon. If anything, Jinx made Fishbones for Silco AND herself - something for the two of them to share.

Because if Silco had lived and they had attacked Piltover together, Jinx would’ve still been the one firing Fishbones, Silco would’ve been standing right there next to her of course, but Fishbones was always going to be her weapon.

Fishbones - The Physical and Literal When

My theory is that Jinx has tried to make Fishbones over the years and was finally only able to complete him (in a few days), once she figured out hextech (Acts II & III.)

The main Fishbones drawing I've been talking about proves he wasn’t thought of and then made and finished in a few days, rather he’s been in the works for a while.

I also think the scene in which we see the drawing is some great foreshadowing.

The unrefined hextech crystals landing top of the drawings of Fishbones and her family, right after her breakdown (ep. 3).

Fishbones may have only been an idea at the time and maybe that's all he could've ever been, but once the crystals were refined into gemstones, there became a way for Jinx to bring her vision to life.

I could also argue, that without the tragedy of losing her family and Silco taking her in - Fishbones may have never existed.

Even with Powder's fantasy of Fishbones and her being more than ready to use her grenades, she's never actually hurt anyone before, not as far as we know. It's possible if things stayed relatively the same, Powder would've ended up freaked out or scared of the reality of what her weapons can do.

Jinx on the other, being raised by Silco... not so much.

-

I'm so glad I noticed all these monster and shark details, because initially my timeline for Fishbones was that Jinx came up with the idea for him and executed said idea in less than a week.

While Jinx is beyond impressive, when would she have time to do that?

Seriously, even if Jinx didn't get any sleep (more than likely) there are only so many hours in a day and she was doing a million other things.

But with this new (very loose) timeline, well everything makes a whole lot more sense.

It's still beyond amazing Jinx made and finished Fishbones in the time frame she did – but it’s more doable (for her), especially since Jinx has shown to be able to accomplish a whole lot when she’s under a time crunch.

But like I've said, I believe Jinx has been working on Fishbones for years now and I’m guessing she couldn’t make her specific vision of him into a reality because she didn’t have a strong enough power source; so, he was put on hold.

But once she cracked the gemstone/hextech – it was “simply” a matter of redesigning Fishbone’s design to be a hextech devise.

Basically, I think Jinx was able to finish Fishbones by the finale, because she salvaged her previous protypes of him for parts

None of this is easy or simple by the way. Fishbones truly shows how much of a genius Jinx is. Seriously, consider the fact that at the end of S1 the three experts on hextech and known inventors of its devises are Jinx and the two literal creators and founders of Hextech.

That's amazing.

Jinx taught herself hextech by using the notes and research she stole from them, which is beyond insane and I feel like so many undercut how truly impressive that actually is.

In addition, Fishbones' existence shows us how inventive, adaptive, and weirdly enough practical Jinx is.

The last one may seem odd, but remember Silco told her she needed to crack hextech sooner than later, so, working with a design she's been struggling with for years and adapting said design to be a hextech one; rather than just starting from scratch is really practical of her.

And Jinx did all of this while remaining true to herself and her aesthetic, because she's all about that self-expression and creativity.

Jinx wouldn’t/couldn’t design just any weapon for Silco, especially not for his war against Piltover, none of those weapons would've been good enough for him or for her.

The weapon she made to help Silco finally turn the tables on Piltover, would've had to be something significant and meaningful to them both, because this is important to them.

So, even though Silco never saw Fishbones, I know he would’ve absolutely appreciated and loved him.

Fishbones was made to be something the two could share in a way; if anything, he’s a symbol of their bond as well as all the things they have in common, in particular their shared love and admiration for monstrous creatures.

And I absolutely love that so goddamn much, because in a way Fishbones shows Silco and Jinx were “always meant” to be father and daughter.

Who else would’ve truly appreciated her giant shark bazooka?

Who else would’ve found Silco's sea monsters to be just as beautiful and awe inspiring as he did?

Summary

Fishbones was an idea of Jinx’s long before she ever met Silco and what started out as power fantasy of a young powerless girl, became not only a reality, but her ultimate show of power (at least for S1).

Fishbones was made for Silco’s sake though, Jinx was going to present him to Silco as the weapon to turn the tables on Piltover.

He's a shark because of Silco's love for sea monsters AND because of Jinx's own love and fondness for monsters (+ sharks).

Fishbones also, at least I think so, shows their bond as father and daughter over the years.  

In regards to when Jinx made Fishbones, I think since Silco took her in, she's likely tried to make him a few times, but he's never worked – likely because she didn't have a strong enough power source.

But once she figured out hextech, she was able to implement the tech into her redesign, and by using her other skills and knowhow, Jinx was able to create the perfect weapon for herself.

[viennacherries]

Headcannons for Rolan, Zevlor, Dammon, and whoever else you want with a partner who’s huge on giving them body worship? I want them all to know they’re loved, especially their physical attributes (Larian let me kiss Rolan’s freckles you cowards)

yesyesyes you absolutely can! lots of freckle kisses for rolan, he deserves them. added an element of acts of service because i think they deserve it. +bonus gale because he DESERVES IT

rolan's is a little suggestive but there's no nsfw.

SFW

~~~

ROLAN

Rolan spends so much time bent over his desk that he comes to bed one night literally hunched over.

"Babe... Why are you standing like that?" "... My neck hurts."

It takes a little convincing, but eventually Rolan agrees to let them give him a bath and a massage.

They massage his head while they wash his hair and it eases a headache he didn't even realise he had. How long has there been pressure behind his eyes? Too long, evidently.

They trail their hands over his shoulders and back, drawing lines with soap between all of his freckles like constellations. He can't help sighing into it.

After the bath they lay him down on his front in their bed, and they straddle him to massage his back and neck.

Rolan's never had a massage before. He's completely mind-blown.

He feels like how he did when he first started dating them, where every time they touched him it felt electric. Every pass of their hands over the knots in his back has him relaxing further into the mattress.

His partner obviously adores this, and when they're sure he's relaxed enough they roll him over and travel his whole body, kissing every inch of him. When he breathlessly asks what they're doing, they say that they're determined to kiss every freckle on his body.

"... Every freckle...? Even...?"

"Yes, Rolan. Even those ones."

They keep their word. Rolan's muscles are incredibly relaxed by the time they both go to bed.

ZEVLOR

They're Zevlor's first partner in quite a while so he's always eager to please. He's usually the one doing the worshipping.

He's an older guy. He's been through the wringer a few times. He's ready to settle down and treat you right.

He just. Isn't expecting that treatment back?

It's probably something to do with how used to the idea of people relying on him he's become. He just naturally assumes the role of caretaker.

His partner notices this early on and makes an effort to show Zevlor all the love they can, so that at least around them he's not the only one doing the heavy lifting.

They bring him in for hugs and kisses whenever they get the chance and let him sleep on their chest. He loves it endlessly.

One day he comes into their home and he seems quieter than usual.

With a bit of prodding he reveals that he's feeling his age a bit today. When he looked in the mirror this morning his wrinkles seemed more noticeable, and every time he had to crouch he felt his knees pop and struggled to stand back up straight.

He's a bit insecure, and he feels unworthy of his partner because he feels like he's past his prime.

Well. That just won't do.

Cue kisses all over his face, every wrinkle and crease that they find has gentle pecks placed all the way along it.

By the time they're done Zevlor is a blushing, giggling mess. He feels like he's 100 years younger, but he also feels less like it matters if he's getting older. They love him regardless.

DAMMON

Dammon is the easiest to get to accept care of the three of them. He'll tease and moan that he should be the one looking after them, but he loves it really.

He's never really had someone who properly looks after him like this. He relishes it.

Their favourite way of showing love to his body is after he's spent a long day over the forge.

He comes in covered in smudges of ash and dirt, soaked through with sweat.

It's become a nightly ritual. They slowly undress him, and lead him to the basin with a warm cloth and a tender touch.

They clean his face first, wipe away the dirt and grime and kiss in the wake of the cloths path.

Then it's his hands, and they take extra care of his hands. They're his lifeblood, the most important tool to his craft, so they show every digit exceptional love. Kiss every joint, massage his hands til all of the tension of the day is gone.

They'll sponge him down if he asks, but he usually prefers to do that bit alone. He finds some peace in washing away the days sweat and restoring himself to normalcy.

If he asks, they'll draw him a bath, fill it with lovely smelling oils. They'll cleanse him top to toe until he's a puddle in their arms.

Dammon absolutely adores it. He's never felt so cherished.

+ GALE

Gale still struggles with his self-worth in the aftermath of everything that happened.

The mark of the orb is particularly difficult for him. It doesn't hurt anymore, but it's a constant reminder of his greatest mistake.

His partner thinks it rather suits him, honestly, but it bothers him and therefore it demands their attention.

If they spot him staring at it in the mirror, they'll come up behind him and wrap their arms around him, covering the scar with their arms.

When he turns to face them, they'll dance gentle kisses over the lines of the mark, trail their fingers over it gently til he shivers.

They generally just like putting their hands over it, lavishing it with little touches and rubs. They almost lost him to the damn orb. To them, the scar is a reminder that they won.

Gale still doesn't like that it's there, but he supposes he can get over it.

After all, it all worked out in the end, didn't it?

[mynameisnotsoda]

NOW INTRODUCING.... THE CRITTERS !!!

Technically Corvid is still a part of an au, i really like everyone's designs so i guess its just like a weird little au that are also kinda ocs?? Idk. Im still tagging it as the animatronicfication au and using the other ccs names but im completely separating wilbur from Corvid.

The one that probably changed the most is simp LMAO i just went back to his old design that was inspired by Luna (@starrixle's transfem simpbur turned oc) and Spencer is such a fitting name in my mind i literally can not imagine him with a different name *bwomp*

Also I'm working on refs for the other characters associated with the respective critters! I wanna finish them all and dump them into one post and I'll link it here when I'm done.

ANYWAY INFODUMP TIME

Before we go into individual characters i want to say that this is absolutely Minecraft. Like. The world is built off of Minecraft lore yk !!!! The overworld will still be called the overworld but it's basically just earth, with more magic and humanoid species! Along with supernatural creatures and cryptids n stuff :D also with more advanced tech considering Corvid exists pFF

Spencer for the most part kinda was like he is in canon or whatever. She used to lean more towards incel ideology because she was REALLY insecure and uncomfortable with herself for the longest time. Despite that, Spencer and Adrianne (egirl) started dating when they were 17, his unhealthy obsession with her was only fueled by her unhealthy attachment to him. They needed each other and it wasn't good for either of them. Spencer had developed horrible separation anxiety which only made things worse. Over time Adrianne became suffocated by his constant neediness, overwhelming insecurity, short temper and lack of contribution to household chores. It pained her to leave, but things needed to change. It wasn't until the breakup that Spencer met Shepard, who was his first irl friend in a long time. They met when they were around 22/23, at first Spencer just used Shepard as a distraction from Adrianne, especially since he was surprised that they wanted to even be his friend in the first place. But after a while he genuinely started to enjoy their company, plus they offered him really good advice and helped him through a gender/sexuality crisis. Eventually they became partners! Maybe not romantically, as they're both aromantic, but life partners nonetheless.

OH and i did make Spencer white/Salvadoran. Her mom is the first generation from immigrant parents while her dad is British; And her dad's younger brother is Adam's dad! He's also an ex-christian, he left due to religious trauma and moved to America to escape his family hA

Spencer's also a no sabo kid LMAO (he knows some words/phrases but other than that he cant speak Spanish to save his life)

ALSO ALSO. Oh my god i could talk about Spence all day LMAO but i made him a werewolf !!!! Hes SOO jealous of Adam because she wanted the cat genes but instead got bitten and turned into a werewolf as a teenager. She's done a pretty good job at hiding it from her family so Shepard's the only one who knows.

I already dumped everything about Adam into that other post, so I don't really have much else to add. HOWEVER !! Him and Spence are cousins now :3 Adam doesn't get to meet Spencer in person until he moves to America with Charlie & co, but he does follow her socials with his secret accounts that his parents don't know about. The only reason they know they're cousins is because Spencer's dad told her so and she reached out! Much to the dismay of Adam's parents but they've secretly kept in touch online.

Keith's pretty much stayed the same apart from a slight design revamp. Although I've made him a little older since originally i made him look young. But then I decided hes a dad so i started drawing him older for the asks pFF he also has a hooked nose now! In case it's not obvious. Keith got married to Jean VERY young, they were maybe 17/18 in human years. It was an arranged marriage and their only goal was to have an heir to the throne. Well they did, they had two kids, the eldest being a boy named Lune and the youngest being a girl named Sunny, who's the would be heir. Until Jean took both the kids and left. It was completely unprompted and left everyone in the kingdom confused, especially Keith. Sure, they had a loveless marriage and maybe he was insufferable at times, but he wanted to make it work if not for the kids then for the kingdom! But its been almost a year since she left, he's lost hope in ever finding her. Keith desperately wants his kids back, not because Sunny is the rightful heir— though that is part of it—but he loves them both dearly. He misses them the most.

Wilfred has pretty much stayed the same as well! I did give him a grey tshirt and darker hair to further distance his design from wilbur though. Hes just as unhinged and immoral as he used to be !!!! Nothing has changed aside from appearance actually.

Tobi also pretty much stayed the same except for its now got an orange jumper and lighter brown hair pFF although i do now have a story for him! Tobi was found by Alejandro in a storage auction, he managed to sell a lot of pretty valuable things from there but Tobi stood out, obviously, so he kept it. Alejandro is a travel vlogger and lives in an RV with his friends: Tomas, Philip and Charles. His friends just call him Alex. Anyway, they go from town to town trying local food, visiting tourists traps and vlogging the journey! While doing that they also try to find out how to get Tobi's memories back and possibly turn him human again, if they even can. So far they haven't had much luck but maybe one day...

Corvid was created as the backup singer and lead guitarist of the first all animatronic band! Brought to you by Beloved Entertainment! The other members include lead singer Ranboo Beloved, keytarist Tommy Raccoon, and bassist James Tomcat. Located in Ranboo's Mega Pizzaplex, the only location in the world (so far). Corvid adopts a showman personality while on stage, hes charismatic and such a heartthrob, very popular with the ladies. Off stage he's very calm and soft spoken, he's rather shy but still manages to be a flirt and a tease. Lightly poking fun at his bandmates, coworkers and even guests at times. He's definitely a fan favorite for a reason!

This was so fun to write and i cant wait to share more !!!! Stay tuned !!!!!!

[darksigns-exe]

My Endless Distraction - Nicholas Ruffilo/Noah Sebastian/OFC

Paring: Noah x Nicholas x OFC

Warnings: None.

Word Count: 1.1k

Note: Listen I am just the messenger. I can't stop these poly brainworms. If you find punctuation mistakes no you didn't.

Nick finds them on the sofa. He doesn’t get to see them like this often, there’s still something hesitant about Noah. But Nick thinks that it’s less shame and more insecurity. He knows that the younger is still struggling with accepting how he feels. It’s new for all of them, but he knows Noah well enough to know that it might take him a little longer to really come to terms with it.

Noah has his head in her lap and from what he can tell he’s fast asleep. An even rarer sight.

He watches them from the door for a moment. Her hand is carding through his hair, and occasionally her fingers drift across the skin at his temples. It’s such an intimate moment that Nick can hardly convince himself to disrupt them.

She does notice him eventually. She waves him over. Gently as he can manage, Nick manoeuvres himself under Noah’s long limbs. He grumbles a little but otherwise gives little effort to move himself.

“How was your day?” She asks, reaching out of Nick's hand with the one that isn’t tangled into Noah’s hair.

“Busy. Good kind.” He gives her hand a squeeze, “What did you two get up to?”

“We tried to watch Evangelion.” She draws her hand across his cheek, “I don’t think he’s sleeping much at the moment."

Nick has heard the younger roaming around the house in the depths of night for a few nights in a row now. He knows that Noah sometimes struggles with falling asleep, but this is a lot even for him.

They’re silent for a while, and Nick just allows himself to watch Noah and her. Sometimes he thinks that it’s easier for Noah to pretend that he’s just with one of them. It should make him feel bad, but he understands the turmoil that must fill his waking thoughts. He’s been there too, but he had her bounce his fears off of. Noah isn’t as willing to part with his inner monologues.

Speak of the devil the younger stirs and stretches his tired limbs further across Nick's lap.

They’re in suspension for a moment before Noah realises that it’s not just the two of them anymore. He doesn’t immediately remove himself from Nick's lap and instead sinks a little deeper into her embrace.

“When did you come back?”

“Just now.” Nick gives his calf a squeeze, “Didn’t miss much.”

Noah turns onto his back and properly stretches across their bodies. It’s a miracle that he even fits on the sofa, considering how tall he is.

“You two eat yet?”

The smirk that plasters itself across Noah’s face tells him that he’s at least eaten something. Nick smacks his thigh, “Something real.”

She shakes her head before Noah can dig himself even deeper into that hole, “Thought we could order something in?”

Noah finally, albeit reluctantly, sits up but remains pressed to her side as if he’s glued to her. Nick gets it. There are very few places he’d rather be.

They order enough to share among the three of them. Noah’s fork will find its way to their plates anyway, and she’s always adamant that she doesn’t want fries, but always ends up stealing Nicks. And so he orders a bit of everything, even the bits they don’t think about. No one’s going to tell Nick that he isn’t considerate.

She’s perched on the counter in front of Noah when he comes back into the kitchen with the bags.

“I just don’t know why you always assume the worst. I really hope that neither Nick nor I have ever given you the feeling that this isn’t serious.”

He pauses just before the last corner.

“No — it’s not that —" he pauses for a moment, “It’s just — if this goes bad, I don’t just lose one of you.”

“Then we don’t let it go bad.” Nick can almost see the soft expression on her face, “But you need to talk to us for that. This can’t work if we don’t talk to each other. Right, Nick?”

He’s sure the damned woman has some kind of sixth sense.

Noah lets out a laugh at that.

And when Nick rounds that last corner, he finds him with his head dropped to her shoulder, his own still shaking with silent laughter.

"You know that he tries that all the time, right?" Noah says, picking himself up again, "He thinks he's sneaky like that, but you can hear him from a mile away."

Nick wants to protest, but he knows it's true. And truth be told, seeing them gang up on him makes him feel all warm inside.

"Terrible liar too." she digs, throwing him wink "But to get back to it. If we want this to work, and I wholeheartedly want it to work, we need to talk. This hush hush stuff doesn't work." she looks directly at Noah then, who shrinks into himself just a little "I know it's comfortable, but it won't do us any good in the long run."

Nick sets the bags down on the table in the middle of the room.

"I think we can all work on that." he says with his back still turned to the pair of them, "Expectations, limits and all that."

He hears her hop off the counter, "I think we should have had that talk before you ganged up on me like that. Don't get me wrong, that was fun, but --"

"That should have been a conversation." Nick agrees, "Are we good to have that talk now?"

There'll be some uncomfortable things, he's well aware of that, but he'd rather have it out of the way and talked about than shelved for yet another day.

Noah is the first one to give his yes, and she follows shortly after.

And so there's some back and forth over dinner. They agree that it's easiest if Noah stays with them for the time being, he's between places anyway and one commute less can only make things less complicated. Noah doesn't feel quite ready to dive into things with Nick, but he wants to try, and that's enough for him. Things involving her are fine, Nick supposes it's easier for the younger because he's used to girls and everything else is so painfully new. But he's glad that it's not off the table entirely. All in all the conversation is less tense than he'd anticipated, and his shoulders feel, to his surprise, a lot lighter once they return to the living room.

He's sure that he won't remember a bit of whatever they're watching, but it matters little when he gets to spend the evening with the two of them. He's seen all of Evangelion often enough. But every little step they take here is new, and he'd rather watch them than the images that flicker across the screen.

Nick tries not to make it known that he noticed the tattooed hand that slithers up his leg and finds a hesitant home against his calf, out of fear that he'll flee like a spooked bird.

He's trying, he instead repeats in his mind, that's good enough.

[vulturesrottencorpse]

artists/generally smart ppl plz help

okay so basically I've been on and off about this subject/question for about a year or so now and I still dont know how to approach it.

Is drawing (NON SEXUAL) nudity alright if you're a minor

I'm a minor, young one at that, and I've been a primarily feral artist my whole life (wings of fire kid, I always draw dragons) however in more recent years I've been moving into anthro territory a bit more than I used to

When I was younger, I'd draw the basic anthro build, but now that I'm older I'm experimenting a bit more with how I draw anatomy especially o my fursona. (My fursona matches my irl anatomy). So I draw my fursona with boobs (GASP). HOWEVER there's like, no nipples or anything else like that at all, but now I've started wanting to/trying to implement that a bit more into how I portray my fursona because it makes me more comfortable with my body and insecuritys (tho I also do this by drawing stretch marks, my overbite, eyebags, ect ect).

But I am stuck wondering if it's OKAY to do that (adding nipples. Probably not anything else tho. ) since I am a minor and I ALSO don't like having my art sexualised at all (obviously that's another problem, if I draw nudity even if it's completely non sexual ppl will still call it suggestive/nsfw)

So I need someone to answer this for me. THis stupid dumb question that I've been wondering for so long

Can I draw nipples on my fursona boobs yes or no chat 🤸

Edit: thank u guys ur replies rlly helps I’m finally no longer stressing over this 🫶🫶🫶

[ninelivesastrology]

I think the reason Rohini causes envy and insecurity in others because Rohini really knows how to make the sweetest lemonade out of lemons. When they encounter Rohini, they realize they're worse off than Rohini even with everything they have and realize they're not happy. I don't think a lot of Rohini natives see it because of the "bubble," there's a tendency to live blissfully in ignorance or ignore things because they don't concern us.

And I really found that to be the case in other people where they may have more or the same, but in reality, they don't know how to make the best of it or can't. It's usually that they can't.

My Lagnesha is in Rohini and I've experienced a lot of people feeling personally attacked because in their mind, my life should stay traumatic to make them feel better about their own. Or because my life was traumatic, it should stay that way to make them feel better. In person, over the internet (I could write an essay on hate following), the obsession is real no matter how subtle it is. It's always, "Why aren't you doing worse than me?" in the most covert way.

If I'm being honest, I've found that some women are even envious of my romantic and sexual trauma or twist it in their minds so severely that they believe I'm irresistible or special, like I'm an exotic animal. It's a weird manifestation of the other wives being heated over the Moon favoring Rohini. Like, "I wish someone would obsess over me like that," because in their minds, my trauma reads as true love to them and they feel violently insecure.

People think Rohini has it so easy especially when it comes to older women and younger Rohini women. The invalidation and being treated as if you're naive and saying/posting slick shit and general, corny passive aggressive behavior that they think you won't get. Rohini is the baby and people think babies are dumb when in reality, their brains are soaking up EVERYTHING.

Another thing about Rohini is that the association with babies and people feeling like we can start over or we have our whole life ahead of us.

I really think of this Lao Tzu quote, "New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings," and it just makes me think of the transition between labor and a baby taking its first breath. The ecstasy and happiness and potential is what people focus on.

And I definitely obviously identify with the whole "nine lives" thing because it feels like I've lived so many and started over again and again. Literally rebirth. I think people get envious of these hard resets because they feel stagnant in comparison. They don't want our lives to change because theirs isn't either or it takes a turn for the worse.

Other people really have this "the grass is greener on the other side" mentality when it comes to Rohini. Green with envy. And once pruning all the weeds, Rohini definitely draws in people who want to give to Rohini, want to please Rohini and spoil Rohini. It really makes people fume and that's why I'm private, if not misleading.

Rohini is the Moon's favorite after all, but it's not just other people, it seems that Rohini is favored in general which makes other people end up bothered where they shouldn't be in the first place.

"Lucky girl syndrome," I think they call it.

[or0ch1maru]

do you think you could write us some more SFW Hidan headcanon pleaaase?

of course I can ^.^ I love our sadistic boy with my whole heart. If I end up writing a repeat I apologize. It’s been a while lol

•

-I personally feel like he’s a lefty. And anytime he has to write something, his script is messy and sometimes hard to read so most of the time he’ll have Kakuzu fill things out for him.

-despite having a messy scrawl, I feel like his signature would be really fancy or cool.

-in his spare time I can see Hidan sketching or drawing. And it’s really good too which surprises a lot of the members the first time they see his sketch book

-when Hidan is alone I can see him enjoying a good read or study. He loves to learn but keeps that hidden from everyone, except his partner. I’ve mentioned before that Kakuzu knows everything about Hidan and vice versa.

-has a collection of small stuffed animals, the ones that aren’t over 6 inches. Ones that are easy to hide if someone comes into his room.

-i also believe he wouldn’t have much left from his childhood so the few items he has, he cherishes. One being a raggedy looking brown bear stuffy, a picture of him & his parents, and a piece of fabric torn off his mother’s scarf.

-we don’t know much about Hidan’s past but I could see him being a mama’s boy and has a LOT of respect for women, especially pregnant mothers, or mothers in general. Holds doors open for them, looks away if a woman needs to pick something up so it doesn’t seem like he’s trying to stare up her dress, carry one’s groceries if a woman couldn’t handle that and her stroller, etc

-I also think he has respect for the elderly. Would assist in getting them across the road, help them up/down stairs if they’re having issues walking, or if they couldn’t reach something on a shelf in the supermarket

-just like anybody, he’ll have moments where he feels insecure. Whether it’s about his looks or personality. Sometimes it might spiral into a depression or a short moment of self loathing but our big grouch Kakuzu is always there to lift Hidan’s spirits and it works

-his safe space is his room, but specifically his bed. Being tucked away under blankets and a wall of soft and squishy pillows soothes his worries quickly. It’s the one place he feels like he can truly be himself without having to put on a show for anyone

-as much as I believe Hidan would be a ‘player’, constant hook up’s, I imagine he got that all out of his system when he was younger and all he wants is to find that one lucky man or woman he can settle down with.

-I’ve mentioned before as well that he’s experimented a lot sexually and realized he swings both ways. Not that he’d voice it, scared that people would think less of him

-has his bed pushed into the corner of his room. Doesn’t enjoy having both sides open, gives him a sense of security being able to tuck himself away if he feels like it

-Hidan’s room isn’t messy, or 100% clean. It’s neat enough, but his shoes might be scattered by the door, his cloak tossed lazily over the back of the desk chair or couch in his room, might have a cup or plate on his bedside table he hasn’t gotten around to taking to the kitchen.

-posters and sketches littering the walls around his bed, a strip of led’s/fairy lights above it too so when the lights are off, he has a nice glow coming from them.

-finds peace in silence

[termagax]

i hesitate to reblog my comic pages a whole bunch of times because i have a lot of personal gripes and things i dont think look very good or i wouldve done differently or reworked if i hadnt been so fed up with it ESP. the dialogue im so bad at dialogue and i worry that reblogging it a bunch is gonna let other people notice that especially so long after ive made it. but also there are a few panels tjat ARE so so so cute

these first ones especially look good and i KNOW thats because the entire comic was just to give justification to THIS SHOT i LOVE this shot i was havign DREAMS avout this shot i have 5 different abandoned attempts to write it out in a fic i spent days thinking of nothing except how badly i wanted to cut his hair and run my hands over it and kiss him on his stupid head and i think it REALLY shows. esp the angle of his head when its turned away from the camera like that looks SOOOO good to me.

this bits fine i think it couldve been laid out better and i wish i was good at lettering but the drawings themselves are fine. i DONT think i figured out how to draw this hairstyle like i dont think it comes across well unless you already know what hes supposed to look like. but its fineeee i like how square i made his head and i like the ideaaaa of making fun of him for being old so i think the interaction is cute enough to justify the jank

THIS PANEL ALSO. JUST SO CUTEEEEEEE theres a lot of jank w proportions and shape but again the interaction is everything to me i like the idea that he isnt really comfortable being looked at like that? like in my head hes not an insecure guy and clearly hes very very confident in himself and his appearance but i just dont think hes comfortable being. treated affectionately in that way ? if that makes sense? i know some people disagree with this but i just dont think he really dates or even really does hookups so i think hes just easy to fluster. hes a confident guy but the attention he gets is usually more people being scared or finding him weird or offputting or gross. scary dog. so i just like the idea that he gets embarrassed when they look at him or call him pretty. and also i like when he shrugs it off by being a dickhead.

i wish i liked the panels on the second page more but it was a huge struggle to figure out and id been working on it for like 8 hours and i was so annoyed and none of the panels were turning out and i couldnt come up with anything better than the PLACEHOLDER DIALOGUE. and the panelling is ROUGHHH like the layout is just not good and i dont think it communicates what i wanted to.

but THIS panel is so cute to me I LOVE THEMMMMMM my friends my best friends. you can actually see on the hand here and a few other shots on this page i was STRUGGLING w my lines and was trying out a different technique that my best friend nini suggested where you block in a sillouhette and then erase out the middle chunk. and it looks really cool i like the look of it but i think you can clearly tell which things are done that way and which ones arent so its a bit jarring. but i DO wanna use that more because it looks good it just kind of conflicts with my normal process so i have to find a Project. it doesnt work well w an undersketch so i tend to use it when a pose just is NOT coming together or when i can really see it in my mind and just cant get the structures to work out.

this shot is ALSO REALLY CUTEEEEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE HIS FACE. this comic was fun because i usually use his long hair to cover his face (because i think its cute and cheeky to not show his face as much as possible and esp. when hes younger i just like the idea that he sort of hides it even before he had the mask.) so i dont have to worry about his expressions as much so it was FUN to get to draw his whole face. but also it changes the balance of what details i have room for? idk if you guys have noticed but i try to keep my shapes really distinct and my art not too busy so there are pieces where i will fully leave out details i think are there especially his facial piercings (youll notice he doesnt have them in this comic) and sometimes even his scar if the piece is too busy in the head/torso region. and a lot of times between his bangs and the way i do his facial hair i just end up leaving the scar out or leaving it as light implication. but it is always there. so because his hair is out of his face i got to consistently include it (though not every panel - see the one i talked about earlier? i leave it out there because i think itd make the blush lines not read as well and i was trying to stick to black and white.) and that was interesting to proportion. BUT ANYWAYS. this panel is so cute i think everything came out really well and i kind of nailed the style i was going for with it like the tooneyness is just totally there. i struggle sometimes with figuring out the right way to do his jawline and i think this one just clicked so nicely and its exacltly what i wanted it to look like.

although if youll permit me to ramble EVEN LONGER i worry sometimes that going so cartoony means he doesnt look "like roadhog" like ovw has such a semirealist style which i hardcore struggle with sometimes (and u can tell in this comic when i do try for that it doesnt looook as good) and i worry that im abstracting the realness out of him and not communicating it as well as some of the artists i really look up to who are SUPER good at striking that balance btwn cartoony exaggeration and expression and realistic weight and proportion (im not gonna namedrop but youve certainly seen me gush about their stuff before). it wouldnt bother me so much if he had like a canonical face like i dont sweat it with rat everyone knows what rat looks like but this is a guy i made up in my mind so i REALLY WANT to be able to communicate what i think he looks like so i get nervous doing these abstractions. but ultimately i think those abstractions are the better half of my work they just look better and i basically only draw for me anyways so leaving details implied works fine for me (ie: when i see his face in my head i think he has a lot more signs of age. but i leave them out because it would clutter the place too much)

anyways sorry for the impromptu directors commentary i just think SO MUCH abt my art and every decision i make has like 900 years of thought behind it and i like to talk. thanks if you read this far i love you 🫶

[fioras-resolve]

there's a frequent insecurity i have about comparing my work as a game developer to others. not just other gamedevs, i actually feel fairly secure that i'm doing something unique and genuinely cool in my genre. but comparing it with other types of artist.

like, it's taken me six months to develop daybreak hearts, and i suspect it'll take about another six to finish. that's actually a really quick turnaround as gamedev goes. in the meantime, visual artists on this site and others can make a banger drawing in a day or two. music artists can put out several albums a year. when i think of the output of artists my age or younger over the course of a year, i start to think "is this even worth it?"

i've been at this gamedev shit for nearly ten years of my life, and i'm acutely aware now more than ever how far i am from being a master. i want daybreak hearts to be a 10, optimistically i want people to think of it as a 9, but realistically most people are going to see it as an 8. and that's underselling it, of course, this game is doing something really cool with ludonarrative that could genuinely change how people think about games. but is that really substantially "as good" as the potentially dozens of works an artist can make over the same period?

i don't like to use this blog for venting, as i said i have people i talk to about this stuff. but i'm bringing it up here because like, surely i'm wrong, right? surely games are meaningful in this unique way that makes a year-long project just as valuable as dozens of art pieces? surely i'm thinking about this the wrong way! i know this is the website most likely to view this line of thinking as commodity fetishism, but it's not just about product! it's about my life choices, and whether what i'm doing is even worth it. don't get me wrong, i love game development, i love seeing the magic i've made unfold through play. but at the end of the day, i'm making things for other people to play, and will they even recognize the amount of effort this took?

how do gamedevs get over this anxiety? how do other artists feel about it? how do audiences view it? more than ever, this is an invitation for comment, for conversation. i want to think i'm wrong on this.

[sunbearsophia]

it's been so long since I uploaded art to my Tumblr, and since I've made so many pieces for Twitter, figured I would bring them over here, too! Works out better, since I have more space on Tumblr to ramble!

Anyways, I've doodled Eduardo in his later dad years at least twice, maybe even three times on my Twitter, but Laurel, I only ever drew once in her later mum years. So, I decided to draw her yet again to better figure out her design, and since I want to diversify how I draw body types anyways, my mind instantly went to "MOM BOD-"

Anyways, couple of notes of basically my thought process with the whole mum design! ^^

Definitely imagining she's probably in her mid-forties here, with her oldest Emmy probably in college by then and their youngest, Leo, being in middle school.

I definitely think since Laurel carried two kids, she's definitely got more of a pear-shape than she did in her youth, plus a bit of a stomach roll. It probably worried Laurel when she was younger when exercise and dieting didn't change that, but these days, Laurel's gotten past that, with time and self-love, plus an adoring husband who never ceases in telling her how beautiful she is, healing that insecurity and making her proud of her figure. <3

Has plenty of stretch marks, not to mention a leftover C-section scar from when she had Leo. She loves each and every one of them, they remind her of her kids, and she feels like she earned every single one of them.

Age has done nothing to slow Laurel down in terms of energy, however. She doesn't burn out or give up easily, always having time to spend with her husband, kiddos and friends, and still an actress for theatre and film alike. She knows to slow down and appreciate the important things, but she's still got energy to burn and passion to share!

She's perfectly happy with letting her hair grey, not feeling inclined to redye it or changing its color. She loves how it looks, as do the people around her. She does cut her hair, however, preferring the feeling of less hair to deal with, and likes the pixie cut. She just doesn't really need or want long hair for herself! (However, she LOVES Eduardo's middle-aged long hair, it's so pretty and relaxing to brush, especially since he barely brushes it himself lol.)

BODY. MODS. GALORE. I headcanon Laurel absolutely had a ton of piercings in her youth, something that age didn't stop one bit. She also still has matching MLP tattoos with Eduardo, and definitely has more that aren't pictured here. (Might try and design more at a later date!)

Has a million freckles, on her face, neck, arms and torso, and she loves every one of them. Might be a little jealous when she realizes Matt has more than she does, fuckin' MATT lmaooo.

Really loved drawing this piece! I feel like it's great and important to show more realism in body types and diversity in my art, so this was awesome to practice with! Plus, I'm just unbelievably proud of how she turned out! Laurel is such a huge fav of mine, and I definitely plan to make more art of her later years in my hc!

And yeah, def might try drawing Eduardo like this next, since I could use some practice with dad bods, too! Maybe Anna would also be a good choice to continue the mom trend, as well! But yeah, this was a celebration of older, female body types, and it makes me really proud of the final result and just getting to work on it! <3

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

Regarding how Jimin tells stories like the rainy day fight, I don't think Jimin is comfortable going deep into stories in a public settings. He revealed a lot of rawness in his EP and yet when he had to discuss it on that live that was scheduled, he just skipped a lot of it or left it vague. I wouldn't mind it if it was just him being naturally bad at public speaking but I have a suspicion its probably a result of prior experiences. That he spoke about being better about how he handles his diet, and armys gave him an ed. That he talked about how he's changed and learned how to become a strong man and armys used that characterize his younger self as an insecure mess. He probably learnt to limit his emotional musings to his art.

Yes, I perceive it the same way. Of course his reasons are for him to know, but we also can't help but draw some sensible conclusions. As long as we keep in mind that this is just how we interpret it.

I do understand being wary and taking a step back. And the changes happened mostly during the height of the pandemic and currently. I remember watching some of his vlives from 2019 when he used to mention his friends. He wasn't giving personal details which is understandable, but he was telling stories. Now there's none of that. And it happened at the same time or perhaps when he was becoming very very private. More than he used to be. I'm not trying to say there's something bad in particular with this, it's just an observation. To me it looks like a conscious decision and in that case, I can't complain that I want more from Jimin just so I can be entertained.

Did I get a bit frustrated of how evasive he is even whilst talking about his album? Yes, I admit that. It's because I like to hear about the process, of the artist trying to explain in depth the concept, the themes, if/how personal experiences shape that. A lot of them do and they are opening themselves up and they show vulnerability in a way. Sometimes it's not that deep and other times it's painful. But what I have to remind myself is that ultimately, it's a choice. Just as I as a private, regular individual have trouble sometimes talking about my life with certain people, then the same can be available for artists.

On the other hand, being able to talk about one's art without revealing personal "secrets" it's also possible. You just have to know how to do it. Jimin has been active in the industry for more than 10 years and he's an experienced idol, but talking about group concepts and then having to do that about your own album that encapsulates personal experience is a different game. Which is why I can understand that as well and I think that I should cut him some slack because this was the first time he had to do it on his own. He'll get better and better as the years go by.

I'll add a little observation here. Kidergarden teacher is mostly a joke and he put on that role even while watching his Like Crazy mv. Jimin from 5-7 years ago would've probably had a completely different attitude. I believe that what current Jimin is doing is an active calculated choice in how he wants to be perceived. This is the side that he wants to show for now in some specific contexts (an important observation), whether I personally like or agree with it. My two cents, not some definitive verdict.

Lastly, allowing the art to speak for itself is an understandable choice and a good one as well. In his case, the work Jimin does can actually speak for itself because there's something of value there. It leads to multiple interpretations which I think it's amazing. Once the music is out there, it belongs to the listener as well. We add meaning to it. We also add layers over layers of meaning to music videos and photofolio shoots and teaser images. Some may be far fetched, others outrageous and others sensible. We can agree or disagree with them. What's important is that they exist, without the artist having to give a 5k words explanation of each piece. Jimin's interpretation is one thing, but it's not the only correct one. That's not how art works. And that's why expecting him to talk in detail might seem redundant. As I said, it's a choice. If an artist wants to add more, then that's great. If they let mostly their art to do that, then that's fine too.

[asinglestrike]

ClawClan - Year 1 Overview

I'm going to do this for the other clans yearly as well, I don't think i'm going to make posts/draw them but you never know. Let me know if you do want me to draw one of these scenes and I might!

Moon 0:

ClawClan is founded. Sorrelstar, Shrikefur, and Boulderleaf are in positions of power.

While on patrol, Rosemaryclaw and her apprentice Honeypaw find a loner, who asks to join. This loner brings with her a litter of kits.

The loner is renamed from Crystaldapple to Fawnflower. (-flower suffix: a cat who is seen as being motherly/good with kits.) One of her kits, Tarantulakit, is renamed to Hawthornkit. Her other kit, Deerkit, keeps her name.

Moon 1:

Snakeblaze (-blaze or -frost: a suffix I created for my mediators) has gotten a stomachache.

Hawthornkit is apprenticed to Russulaclaw, and Deerkit is apprenticed to Sorrelstar.

Hawthornpaw and Honeypaw sneak out to birdwatch.

Moon 2:

Snakeblaze is feeling better.

In a rare act, Sorrelstar complements Deerpaw on a huge catch. Maybe this loner kit could be of some use after all....

Moon 3:

Rosemaryclaw has gotten heat exhaustion.

Honeypaw becomes a warrior named Honeypelt (-pelt a well rounded cat with no standout traits.) She becomes insecure and a good kit-sitter.

Hawthornpaw is caught breaking the warrior code by trying to speak to Honeypelt during Moonlight Vigil. He is tasked to follow Boulderleaf for a moon.

Deerpaw was seen talking to a loner named Starling, who recognized her from when she was younger.

Moon 4:

Fawnflower also falls victim to heat exhaustion.

Hawthornpaw's punishment is over, but he still pads after Honeypelt like a lost kitten.

Sorrelstar takes out Deerpaw for battle training. With a gleam in her eyes, Deerpaw asks to be taught advanced battle moves. Sorrelstar lashes her tail and says she'll teach her advanced hunting techniques. Deerpaw frowns the whole time.

Moon 5:

Rosemaryclaw and Fawnflower has recovered from heat exhaustion.

Honeypelt, in an effort to prove they are a standout warrior, attempts to fight a badger. They don't make it. Hawthornpaw is devastated.

Deerpaw seems distracted during training. Sorrelstar tells her to talk. Deerpaw asks if it's betraying ClawClan if she is friends with Starling. Sorrelstar asks if she would refuse to fight her just because they had a conversation. Deerpaw quickly replies that she would kill her in a heartbeat if she threatened ClawClan. Sorrelstar purrs approvingly, now teaching her those advanced battle moves.

Moon 6:

Deerpaw is murdered by Russulaclaw in cold blood. Russulaclaw makes it look like an accident. Sorrelstar is furious.

Hawthornpaw realizes that maybe he was latching onto female cats because he felt more right as a female. She announces her transition to female.

Sorrelstar takes over Hawthornpaw's training. It wasn't too late to mold her into the perfect killing machine Deerpaw was supposed to be.

Fawnflower is in denial over Deerpaw's death, barely stirring from her nest.

Moon 7:

Rosemaryclaw is expecting kits. When cats attempt to congratulate her, she snaps that this doesn't make her weak, so don't even try.

Hawthornpaw receives her warrior name, Hawthornfang (-fang: a cat seen good at both hunting and fighting.)

Snakeblaze travels to HollowClan to mediate. News of StrikeClan's declaration of war interests Sorrelstar.

Moon 8:

With Rosemaryclaw in the nursery and Sorrelstar sick, Boulderleaf takes the clan to the gathering, with instructions to befriend HollowClan. However, HollowClan doesn't show, and rumors spread, from greencough to battle wounds.

Rosemaryclaw hopes for a small litter. Less brats to deal with.

Moon 9:

Rosemaryclaw's kits are here. And despite her negative feelings during her pregnancy....her eyes fill with love the second she lays eyes on them. Snakeblaze awkwardly pokes his head in, expecting a snap, but the usually mean Rosemaryclaw softly invites him in to look at their new kits, Silverkit, Mosskit, and Frogkit.

Moon 10:

Shrikefur dies due to a claw wound he got helping Sorrelstar punish Fawnflower. Sorrelstar choses Rosemaryclaw to take over as deputy.

Fawnflower recovers from her wounds, but is now scarred.

Moon 11:

Sorrelstar has healed from her wounds. She eyes little Frogkit a little too closely...

Fawnflower and Hawthornfang are on patrol when then encounter an injured loner named Seven. Hawnthornfang uses her close relationship with Sorrelstar to convince her to let the loner stay.

Moon 12:

Fawnflower accidently trespasses onto RiftClan's territory. Sorrelstar considers confining her to a den.

Frogkit falls into a river, but is saved by his mother, Rosemaryclaw. Rosemaryclaw feels regret that her new deputy duties are keeping her away from her precious babies. She has noticed the looks Sorrelstar is giving to Frogkit, and doesn't like it.

HEY CAN YA'LL STOP MURDERING EACH OTHER FOR TWO MINUTES?!

I actually love playing an evil clan, its so much fun. I'm sad Deerpaw died so young, I had great plans for her. Also rip Hawthornfang x Honeypelt. They were both so cute.

SORRELSTAR GET YOUR GRUBBY LITTLE PAWS AWAY FROM FROGKIT MY SONNNN