#i used to be in the nutcracker every year!!
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slytherinshua · 2 months ago
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what the actual fuck guys i finally found the energy to listen to tws' comeback and they made me CRY :(((( this is literally their best title to date?? i knew they would slay cause they always do but then doing a more emotional and sentimental track instead of a bright one LORD I WAS NOT READY
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backpackingspace · 1 month ago
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Hi yes I miss ballet so fucking much
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if u wanna be in a room with a lotta people in AK you gotta go to the Nutcracker ballet in Anchorage some year. the event center is beautiful and I mean like maybe it isn't as big as what you get in the lower 48 but it's like, THE event of the year for a lot of people. they get a really high level ballet company and have an actual orchestra, which a lot of ballets I've seen in the contiguous states Don't have actually. much as Anchorage is kinda dingy, when it's lit up at night during the Christmas season? gorgeous.
thank you!! this sounds amazing, i love the nutcracker so much and i’ll definitely check it out if i’m in anchorage over the christmas season
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ephemeral-winter · 2 months ago
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was scrolling too fast and saw a tag that i thought said "this fucks actually" but the tag was literally just "tchaikovsky" however as a spoonerism(?) this fucks actually
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thehoneybeestings · 15 days ago
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Enemies to Lovers with Dancer!Vi x Dancer!Reader
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Word Count: 1.8K
Content/Warnings: enemies to lovers, modern!au, dancer!vi au, dancer!reader, suggestive, fem reader (gn pronouns used, though), probably some dance discrepancies because i'm not a dancer myself
A/N: I had so much fun writing this; Vi and reader are so sassy like can y'all just fuck it out already... anyway, hope you guys enjoy!
Love, Bee ୨ৎ
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୨ৎ The day your mom took you to your local dance company's performance of The Nutcracker was the day your love for dance began
୨ৎ At 7, you could hardly tell the difference between The Royal Ballet and Piltover Springs Dance School; and to say you were in awe was the understatement of the century
୨ৎ The glittering tutus, the leaps and twirls; you were sure you'd just discovered what you wanted to be when you grew up: A Ballerina
୨ৎ And here you were now; not quite a Royal Ballerina, but, you'd just gotten cast as The Sugar Plum Fairy in the very same annual performance of The Nutcracker you'd seen 11 years ago
୨ৎ You were beaming, trying your best to contain your excitement as the director of the school read out the rest of the cast list, until...
୨ৎ "For the first time in Piltover Springs Dance School history, our board was left completely at a loss when attempting to choose between our two top contenders for Star Senior. For this reason, we unanimously agreed that this year's Senior Showcase will feature both students. We’ve decided on a contemporary duet, and for this piece, we've chosen Y/n Y/l/n, and Violet Lanes. Round of applause for this year's Star Seniors!"
୨ৎ Your smile drops as quickly as it had appeared on your face just minutes ago
୨ৎ What. The. Hell.
୨ৎ You'd been pushing yourself beyond measure to earn this distinction, and if you were being honest, you'd rather not have earned it all than be the first student in the school's history forced to share it; and nevertheless, with Violet Lanes
୨ৎ As much you loved dance, you hated Violet; who was now more commonly referred to as Vi, courtesy of the nickname her first dance teacher gave to her
୨ৎShe’d been taking Hip-Hop lessons at the school for as long as you'd been taking Ballet lessons, and by the time you both started taking the same contemporary dance class in the 6th grade, your instructors had already started placing bets on which one of you it would be to earn the Star Senior distinction
୨ৎ You wonder if maybe you and Vi could've become friends if it weren't for how fiercely competitive you both were
୨ৎ But, alas: the two of you were nothing if not fiercely competitive, and oh how ironic it was that you'd now share the distinction that had driven you two so far apart
୨ৎ Clearly, Ekko was loving the irony
୨ৎ "Alright, alright, Star Senior! I can't wait for this one..." he'd say, rubbing his hands together with a shit-eating grin on his face
୨ৎ "I'm so pissed," you'd laugh incredulously, shoving pointe shoes into your bag, "I’d even let Caitlyn have my goddamn spot instead!”
୨ৎ "Ouch,"
୨ৎ You'd recognize the voice behind you anywhere
୨ৎ "If we're gonna be spending this much time together, you might wanna learn to love me, sugar plum.”
୨ৎ You turn to see Vi holding out a piece of paper- the schedule for the upcoming dance season- and your eyes scan for the following dates and times:
୨ৎ Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri- Company Rehearsal: The Nutcracker; 5:30-7:00 PM
୨ৎ Mon, Tues, Wed, Thurs, Fri- Senior Showcase Rehearsal; 7:15-8:00 PM
୨ৎ You double, triple, quadruple check that you’re seeing this right
୨ৎ "Every day...?" you whisper, mostly to yourself
୨ৎ "Every day. Short sessions, so we can't really afford not to meet every day."
୨ৎ You look up to find that she's sucking her teeth, trying her best not to crack a satisfied smile at the irritation on your face, and anger pierces through you like a lightning bolt
୨ৎ “You're such a dick,” you seethe, eyes narrowed
୨ৎ She just rolls her own in response, unphased as usual; you'd never been able to get a rise out of her the way she could get one out of you, and that just pissed you off even more
୨ৎ “Look,” she sighs, “I don't want to do this stupid ass duet any more than you do, and I sure as hell didn't bust my ass for this distinction so that I could share it, so let's just get the show over with, and then we never have to see each other again. Cool?”
୨ৎ And you admit- for the first time ever, and certainly not out loud- that she's right; you just needed to get through the next eight months, and then you'd never have to see Violet Lanes again…
୨ৎ But why didn't that feel as good to think about as you thought it would? 
୨ৎ When 7:15 PM rolls around the next evening, you're already spent from your first day of rehearsals for The Nutcracker
୨ৎ You're hot, sweaty, and tired; and when you walk in a minute late to see Vi checking the imaginary watch on her hand, you know the next few months are going to test your patience like nothing has before
୨ৎ “Don’t piss me off,” you spit, shaking your head as you hold a hand out to her
୨ৎ Vi quirks an eyebrow and chuckles through her nose. "Hello to you too, sugar plum."
୨ৎ You scoff at the stupid nickname before you both turn to the instructor, whose eyebrows are raised as he wonders what the hell he's just gotten himself into
୨ৎ The two of you barely speak to each other during your rehearsals; you're just there to learn the moves, and frankly, try not to end each session at each other’s throats
୨ৎ The latter is a bit of a challenge for the two of you, surprising no one, but what does surprise you is the undeniable chemistry you and Vi have as dance partners
୨ৎ You two are quick to learn every move, and even quicker to learn each other; you sync effortlessly… 
୨ৎ Until, the lift
୨ৎ You could not-for the life of you- get the damn lift down
୨ৎ In fact, it takes an entire week of rehearsals to get halfway there, and even then, it's nowhere near performance-ready
୨ৎ "We might have to scratch the lift and come up with something else," your instructor muses, scratching his chin and looking down at his notebook for other ideas
୨ৎ And Vi is quick to notice the way your face falls in response to his words
୨ৎ To know you was to know someone who demanded perfection from themselves, and it was evident that the idea of not being able to handle something as simple as a lift was going to eat at you
୨ৎ And so, she asks you to stay late that day… a proposal you immediately reject, because,
୨ৎ “I don’t need extra practice, and I certainly don’t need to spend more time with you.”
୨ৎ “Y/n,” she’d deadpan, hands on her hips, “Cut the shit. This is why we can’t get the lift down. You freeze up as soon as you get halfway in the air, and when you hesitate, I hesitate, and then I start to drop you, and all of this because you hate me so much that you can’t even relax into a lift you learned to do when you were 15.”
୨ৎ You huff out a laugh, raising your eyebrows and crossing your arms
୨ৎ “Seriously?” You challenge, “Well… maybe you’re just not strong enough to-”
୨ৎ She quirks an eyebrow and gives you a knowing smirk
୨ৎ Yeah… you kinda figured that one wouldn’t work
୨ৎ “Okay… well, I actually learned to do that lift when I was 13, so it’s been a while since-”
୨ৎ “Y/n,” she interrupts, her voice much more stern than the first time your name left her lips 
୨ৎ “What?!” you seethe, now kicking yourself for getting so damn flustered
୨ৎ Vi takes a step forward, and for the first time in your 7-year-long rivalry, her expression softens as she speaks to you
୨ৎ And something blossoms in your belly; something much too close to butterflies for your liking…
୨ৎ “What we’re doing… it’s not working anymore.”
୨ৎ You look up at her through your eyelashes, a pout on your face
୨ৎ You know she’s right
୨ৎ “The break-up speech usually happens after we date, for the record,” you mumble
୨ৎ And she can’t help but laugh, and you can’t help but crack a smile, and have her eyes always crinkled up like that when she laughs?
୨ৎ “C’mon, you know what I mean. You don’t have to like me… but you’ve at least gotta trust me. Just enough for me to hold you in the air for like, three seconds,” she chuckles, “can you do that?”
୨ৎ You stare at her; pensive, hesitant
୨ৎ “I can try.”
୨ৎ “Okay,” she breathes out with a smile, “Then let’s try.”
୨ৎ She presses play on her phone, the same 10-second interval that you’ve heard countless times now begins playing, and you go for the lift; better this time, but she can feel that you’re still unsure 
୨ৎ “Damn it,” you spit as she places you back onto your feet
୨ৎ But this time, her hands don’t leave your hips
୨ৎ “Hey,” she calls out with a squeeze to your sides, “Relax. It’s okay, you’re doing good. I’ve got you, I promise.” 
୨ৎ She’s never talked to you like this before
୨ৎ Had her voice always sounded so sweet? 
୨ৎ Where did that scar on her lip come from?
୨ৎ When did she get this close to you?
୨ৎ “You good?” 
୨ৎ Your eyes snap up to meet hers, and what a pretty shade of blue, and you don’t even mean to lick your lips, and- 
୨ৎ “No fucking way,” she smirks, “you’re checking me out right now?” 
୨ৎ You’re quick to push off of her, immediately denying such claims
୨ৎ “No! What are you talking about? I’m not-”
୨ৎ “Dude, you so are; you just bit your lip!”
୨ৎ “I did not-” you break with a chuckle, closing your eyes. “I was not checking you out.”
୨ৎ“Look at you! Lying through your teeth! It was so obvious, Y/n, I swear to-”
୨ৎ “Are you gonna keep stating the obvious then? Or are you gonna do something about it?”
୨ৎ And oh, did she.
୨ৎ Right there in the studio. 
୨ৎ (And all those mirrors… really makes you think…)
୨ৎ Anyhow... it's safe to say that the next day, your instructor was pleasantly surprised to find that the lift was suddenly no longer an issue
୨ৎ You have your first costume fitting the next week
୨ৎ Your tutu was baby pink, covered in glitter and Swarovski crystals, and stuck straight out from your hips; it was exactly what you dreamed of wearing when you saw The Nutcracker for the first time
୨ৎ You'd beam at yourself in the mirror before turning to Ekko, who was already in his Nutcracker costume
୨ৎ "How do I look?" You'd ask
୨ৎ "Holy shit,"
୨ৎ You and Ekko would turn to the voice you'd recognize anywhere; and there stood a head of hot-pink hair, leaning against the doorframe of the ballet studio, chewing on a granola bar
୨ৎ "You look like a fucking cupcake."
୨ৎ Ekko would let out a bark of laughter, and you'd roll your eyes
୨ৎ "I'm a Sugar Plum Fairy," you'd correct, annoyance lacing your tone
୨ৎ "The Sugar Plum Fairy, lest I not forget," Vi would tease
୨ৎ And Ekko would think he was going crazy when he sees Vi shoot you a wink, and you smile back
୨ৎ “Pretty,” Vi would muse before strolling off into the hallway
୨ৎ Okay, now he was sure he was going crazy
୨ৎ “Wait… Y/n, is that a hickey on your neck?!”
End ୨ৎ
──˚₊•୨ৎ•‧₊˚──
P.S. - so do y'all want a full-length dance studio smut scene or...
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bth3cowboi · 8 months ago
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pas de deux, cl16xreader
masterlist
pairing: charles leclerc x ballerina!reader
summary: In ballet, a pas de deux is a dance for two people. Sometimes between step and step, someone may fall in love.
format: social media au
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( twitter )
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( instagram )
charles_leclerc
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liked by f1, wretchedswan and 1,544,873 others
wretchedswan
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liked by charles_leclerc, yourfriend and 1,788 others
wretchedswan
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liked by charles_leclerc and 5,870 others
wretchedswan winter season is over here in monaco🤍🦢❄️ so happy for the new year ahead! hoping for more nutcrackers, swans and good new pals
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yourfriend umm baby thats a man right there
wretchedswan new pal✨ yourfriend omg is that...? wretchedswan pal✨
user1 it was beautiful to watch you this year!
wretchedswan thank you!!
user2 monte carlo's superstarrrrr
( twitter )
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( instagram )
wretchedswan
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liked by charles_leclerc, joris_trouche, and 10,712 others
wretchedswan la fille mal gardée 🧺🌷💌 come see us at @/lesballetsdemontecarlo
tagged yourfriend;
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user1 rocking the handmaid's tail look
wretchedswan not everyone can relate
yourfriend they said jeté but all you heard was toi ate!!
wretchedswan cuntyyyyy
lesballetsdemontecarlo ❤️🌺
charles_leclerc Wow🤩💐
wretchedswan <3 user2 charles what are you doing hereeee user3 omg Charles????
user4 what is formula 1😭 i just came for the ballet content
user5 cars go vroom
user6 are you charles' girl now??? uugh
user7 thought you were cuter
user8 girlie you're already on wag pages is it trueee
charles_leclerc
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liked by wretchedswan, lewishamilton, and 1,900,433 others
charles_leclerc Enjoying the sun and the beautiful views😉☀️
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user1 my heart just BROKE
user2 so its true???😢
wretchedswan cute👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 I think I had better sights tho
charles_leclerc Impossible, nothing compares to you user3 bro user4 nothing compares to youuu?? oh I died landonorris so cornyyy charles_leclerc mate?? wretchedswan don't break his heart lando💔 let him be poetic in his way charles_leclerc babe... landonorris HAHAHAH lameee🤣🫵🫵
user6 joris they got your man
user7 I wasn't expecting a charles leclerc hard launch at 6am but here I am
user8 the tifosi is weeping user9 every italian man just got their heart broken today
pierregasly Looking good, seems like you're both having some fun😏 invite us next time
charles_leclerc Soon, we want a double date francisca.cgomes yesss! wretchedswan 🥰🥰
wretchedswan
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liked by charles_leclerc, joris_trouche, and 33,202 others
wretchedswan ballet intensives + things I ate this summer🍇🫒🩰
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user1 GIRL??
user2 oh let me see what charles' girlfriend eats- OH
user3 she heard the delulu girlies call her names and she said stay mad im winning lol
yourfriend tw for male
wretchedswan im still yours❤️‍🔥 yourfriend love u sm 🥺 dump him charles_leclerc Wow, you’re the best too👍 @/yourfriend yourfriend 😘😘
user4 theyre actually cute whattt
user5 you think charles was in that theater with a book trying to look mysterious?
user6 a wattpad fantasy but charles is the reader user5 in a 1D concert, Yn is harry styles user7 LMAOOOO
charles_leclerc perfect girl, je t'aime❤️
wretchedswan je t'aime aussi<3
user8 I, too, want to have this diet
user9 me 2 baby me 2
——
a/n: hope you liked this one!! is short and silly but well, I just wanted to write something ballet related lol. If anyone has requests or something to say my asks are open! and my masterlist is uppp
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ch4bby · 3 months ago
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I read two fics some time ago with Tim dancing along with Cass, and omg, it changed me- Because... JUST THINK ABOUT IT-
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Tim being a rich kid, with really strict parents but who are flexible enough so that they don't have prejudices regarding very conventional gender roles. And thanks to this, Tim is put in classical ballet classes long enough to be able to wear pointe shoes.
Tim likes it to a certain extent, as the exercises, physical conditioning and muscle elongation help him to be able to follow the bat and bird duo around Gotham. Over time he stops attending classes either due to his parents' influence to focus on some other activity, or because he preferred that time to coordinate patrol routes and get more photos.
By the time he starts being Robin, he no longer attends ballet classes. The training left a small mark on the way he moves as Robin, but nothing too noticeable. He finds it easy to jump really high and is able to land silently and smoothly. He doesn't get dizzy easily thanks to the pirouettes and fouettes his teacher made him practice daily.
Also, training with Dick is easier than when he trains with Bruce, since with Dick there are really similar exercises thanks to the older boy's training in the circus as an acrobat. The elasticity is not comparable between the two, but Tim has enough so that some of Dick's exercises are not so impossible for him.
Cut out when Cass arrives and Tim notices that she likes ballet, and even more surprisingly, she dances ballet! It is thanks to this that Tim manages to find a common point between the two to be able to start a friendship, with Cass being really excited to know that Tim also knew ballet!
They both connect thanks to ballet, Tim, taking advantage of the fact that they were both quite similar in height and complexion (even in face, which still leaves him wondering sometimes if they weren't secret twins?) shares with her his leotards and shoes, at least the training ones. Because although Cass can stand on pointe with amazing ease, Tim prefers to help her go over the basic training to get on pointe. Because literally, those things break feet, and he doesn't want to see his adopted sister go through that (We're talking about Cass, though.)
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By the time they've been through about two months of helping Cass go over the basics, and remembering moves she remembered seeing from when she lived in the basement of that Ballet school, she can get up on pointe, and Tim hands her some cute yellow pointe shoes that he got years ago, when Robin colors still drove him crazy. So when Cass wears them, they're flexible and soft, not hard and uncomfortable like the ballet slippers one recently bought.
And Tim, he has his cream pointe shoes to wear, also used and flexible, comfortable like an old toy you haven't used in a while and despite everything, you still know how to play with it.
They both select certain days to practice and dance different pieces of music, Tim occasionally teaching her the classical pieces she doesn't know, or showing her how to dance as a couple. Although for this he takes off his pointe shoes and goes back to his leather slippers.
They keep up this routine even when Damian arrives, and so far the only one who knows what they're doing is Alfred, basically because he's the one who usually does their laundry and tidies up the room they use to dance. Making sure the floor isn't too slippery and the furniture is pushed up against the walls to make room. Every now and then, they both invite him to watch a specific dance they've practiced, like a snippet from Swan Lake, The Nutcracker, or The Rite of Spring.
As more time passes, Cass takes more liberties in the dance and fuses ballet with something more contemporary, while Tim sticks to classical ballet. They keep dancing, but now each one gives a personal touch to each pirouette, pas couru, and movement. They make a temporary bar with pvp pipes, which despite everything, works wonders for them.
Maybe Bruce is the first one to find them, after a particularly tiring day in which he just wants to be alone for a few moments and decides to go to the rooms less used, he hears a classical melody from one of the rooms that supposedly, should be empty. And when he goes to see where the music was coming from and why, he finds his two children playing a fragment of Carmen (Gipsy friends duet) and is more than surprised by the ability not only of Cass, but of Tim! Bruce had no idea that Tim could dance ballet, did he learn it now from Cass? Or is it something he already knew?
Whatever the case, what surprises him the most is the amazing coordination of the two, they seem to be the reflection of each other. And with regret Bruce admits inwardly that if it weren't for the distinction of the clothes and the hairstyle, he would swear that he was seeing double.
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anomalyaly · 2 months ago
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The Nut Cracked
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Summary: Sebastian Sallow doesn't understand muggle holiday traditions. But this one, he could get on top of.
OR, a spoof of 'The Nutcracker', but make it feral.
NSFW. ALL CHARACTERS ARE 18+. MINORS DNI.
AO3/Wattpad
3k words. Written for a NSFW discord server event: The Naughty List.
This is NOT canon to the 'Secrets' universe hahaha or is it
Tags: Explicit sexual content, objectophilia if you squint, seventh year, orgasm denial, Sebastian has blue balls and doesn't know how to handle it
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Sebastian didn't understand muggle holiday traditions.
The brightly decorated Ravenclaw girl presented him with a small parcel that he had initially been excited to unwrap. But, as much as he loved seeing the look on Elsie's face as she handed it to him, he couldn't understand why, out of all the gifts she could have chosen, she had picked out an odd-looking wooden doll.
"It's a nutcracker!" She beamed. "My parents can never be bothered to figure out what to get me or my siblings, so they usually send us a whole slew of stuff."
"And...you saw an old man doll and it reminded you of me?" Sebastian turned it around in his hands questioningly. He tried his hardest to seem grateful, but truthfully, he was utterly confused.
She scoffed. "It's not an old man doll. It's a traditional gift that originated in Germany to ward off evil spirits and –"
"Evil spirits?" He laughed. "The only evil spirit we have to worry about during this time of year is Peeves."
"Well, if you don't want it –"
He abruptly yanked his arm away from her and held the wooden figure closer to himself. "I never said I didn't want it. I just think it could be more...appealing."
She tilted her head, her brows furrowed in confusion. "How so?"
Sebastian grinned slyly and picked up his wand, waving it in front of the nutcracker and transfiguring it to look like a girl with wavy, dark hair and freckles dusted along her nose and cheeks. He held it up proudly. "There. Much prettier to look at."
He was met with an eye roll as she stood from the couch and stretched. "If you say so."
Sebastian hadn't been particularly secretive about his feelings for Elsie in recent months. In fact, he thought he was being blatantly obvious, doing everything short of outright telling her due to her relationship status being a bit complicated. Even so, he did his best to hide his irritation every time she brushed off another one of his comments as a sarcastic quip.
It certainly hadn't helped that the other day, she had trudged back from another one of her adventures in the Highlands sopping wet from the snow, the already thin material of her blouse nearly transparent as it clung tightly to her form, her nipples peaked from the cold. He had spent half of the night restless, the other half with his hand wrapped around his cock every time the tantalizing image replayed itself in his mind.
The castle was nearly empty as the two of them spent Christmas at Hogwarts together, and all he could focus on was how frustrated he had felt.
"I should turn in for the night," Elsie sighed, glancing at the time. "I promised Lydia that we would still leave milk and cookies out for Father Christmas. She's very adamant about keeping to tradition."
Sebastian bit the inside of his cheek as he forced himself not to beg her to stay with him for the night. It wasn't like the prefects or professors cared to parade the halls during the holiday with so many students gone. But she likely didn't see him that way. His streak of terrible luck would have him falling for someone he couldn't have.
"Alright," he murmured, hiding the disappointment in his tone. He held up the wooden doll. "Thanks for the, uh...gift?"
She grinned. "Have no fear. We'll exchange our actual gifts tomorrow. But," she tapped the nutcracker's brunette head, "I suppose now, you'll have the nutcracker version of me to help keep you safe."
Sebastian's eyes followed the sway of her hips as she headed toward the gate of the Undercroft. He quickly averted them when she turned back to look at him. "Happy Christmas, Sebastian. See you tomorrow?"
He nodded. "Yeah, see you. Happy Christmas."
She gave him one last soft smile, and the gate clanged shut behind her. Sebastian sighed. Guess I ought to head back to my common room for the evening. He grabbed the tiny doll and sauntered back to his dorm, feeling even more tense than he had been hours before.
It was going to be a long two weeks.
~
Sebastian awoke the next morning, exhaustion creeping in. He needed to get control of his thoughts before he –
"Good morning!"
A light, feminine voice chirped at him from his bedside. The rest of the dorm room was noticeably empty — Sebastian assumed Ominis had left for breakfast early, not wanting to wait while he slept in.
It still didn't explain why Elsie was standing by his bed on Christmas morning. She would never sneak into the Slytherin common room without good reason, let alone his bedroom, even with how often he had teased and prodded her to spend time with him there.
He rubbed his face, his eyes still bleary. "Elsie? What are you –"
The words died in his throat once he finally took a proper look at her. She was smiling coyly at him, her raven hair free and cascading down her back. But what surprised him the most wasn't the expression on her face or the loose, dark strands that curled along her freckled, pink cheeks. It was what she was wearing.
Instead of a Christmas jumper, like she had promised she would have on, Elsie donned the bright red uniform reminiscent of the nutcracker she had gifted him the night prior. It was loose on her small form, barely hanging on to her shoulders, and short enough that it hardly covered the creamy skin of her thighs. He knew he should look away, or at least tell her that she was far too exposed for her liking.
"You're uh..." He cleared his throat. "What...what are you wearing?"
"Oh, this?" She playfully slid the top further down her shoulders. His hungry gaze followed the line down her collarbone and towards the curve of her breasts.
This wasn't like Elsie at all. The girl he knew wouldn't have been dressed like this in his presence, especially because they hadn't so much as kissed yet. She would be flustered, finding anything she could to cover herself up, and likely avoiding him afterward for days out of sheer humiliation.
"Why so shy?" She asked. It was definitely her voice but with a sultry tone. "This is what you wanted, isn't it?"
Sebastian swallowed. How could she have known that? "W-what do you mean?"
Elsie shrugged. "You made me. I heard your wish, and I'm here to grant it."
He blinked. Made?! "If this is some sort of muggle holiday prank, Elsie, it's really not funny."
She chuckled and sat next to him on the bed, draping an arm over his bare chest, and leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "It's not. I'm your nutcracker, silly."
Oh. Oh.
The nutcracker he had mindlessly transfigured last night to look like Elsie had somehow become sentient. And now, Elsie, or at least a perfect copy of her, was practically on top of him, half-naked and promiscuously alluring. It was something he had only dreamed about in the darkest hours of the night, alone in his bed with a silencing charm cast over him.
His thoughts were racing wildly as he drank in the sight of her. She was close enough now and leaning in at just the right angle that he could see entirely down her top, and his breath caught in his throat as he realized that, underneath, she was completely bare. He shifted on the bed as he felt his erection press tightly against his pajama bottoms, quickly losing any scrap of restraint he had left, which hadn't been much to begin with. This was wrong, wasn't it? He couldn't deny how badly he had wanted this – wanted it for months now.
Moments later, her lips and tongue were tracing a hot trail of kisses along his neck, and as she lightly grazed his pulse point with her teeth, the last thread of his control snapped.
In one swift move, he took her face in his hands and fiercely captured her lips with his own, the sensation nearly enough to send him over the edge. Months of pining - of gentle, innocent touches and cuddles that the real Elsie had naively passed off as what two good friends would share - had made him ache with need.
For an imitation, the nutcracker-Elsie felt wonderfully authentic.
His fingers snaked in her hair and tugged lightly, eliciting a soft moan from her that had him shivering. Realistically, had it been their true first experience together, he would have wanted to savor every moment, taking his time as he mapped out every sensitive plane and curve of her body that would make her writhe with pleasure underneath his touch.
But, since this was his Christmas wish, he was going to be self-indulgent and take exactly what he wanted, just as he had imagined doing for so long.
A soft brush of her hand against his very hard and throbbing erection nearly sent him into a frenzy, and he let out a mewl so pathetic he would have been embarrassed had he not felt so ridiculously desperate. His hands scrambled to tear the baggy nutcracker uniform off of her, and as he ran his hand along her inner thigh and traced his fingers along her core, he realized without a doubt that she was soaking. For him.
Happy fucking Christmas to me.
Sebastian groaned as he practically dragged her into his bed and flipped her onto her back. His body vibrated with anticipation when her fingers tugged at his pajama bottoms and yanked them down abruptly. His cock sprang free, already aching with desire, and he melted into a moaning mess when she wrapped her silken hand around him and stroked.
"F-fuck...so good, Elsie —" The way she held him, so expertly gentle and firm at the same time, was better than even his wildest imaginations could conjure. His hips bucked into her touch while he stared down at her through hooded lids, understanding that he needed to take every second to memorize her body in case he never had an opportunity like this again.
Her face was flushed, the smattering of freckles along her nose and cheeks standing out, just the way he liked to see them — one of the reasons he would purposely try to make her blush. His hands followed his gaze as it traveled further down, past her parted pink lips and onto her voluptuous breasts, and he couldn't help but lean forward and take one of her pert nipples into his mouth.
Elsie's sighs and moans as he swirled his tongue around it were music to his ears. He reached out with one hand to cup her other breast while his other slid between her legs once more and lightly circled her clit with his thumb while he pumped two fingers inside of her. The sounds she emitted were delightfully sinful, and he decided that he didn't want to wait any longer. He had waited long enough, trying his damndest to be a gentleman all this time and letting the real Elsie take whatever their relationship was at her own pace.
He had earned this. It was bloody Christmas, and she was his present, and he fucking deserved it.
Sebastian slotted himself between her thighs and pulled back to look at her again. The unbridled need on her face mirrored his own, and he momentarily wondered if he should have spent more time making sure she was ready for him before taking her. After all, if it were the real Elsie, he would have made sure she felt good and reached her release many, many times before he had even attempted to fuck her.
All reason and logic flew out of his brain as he fitted the sensitive head of his cock at her entrance, her slick coating him completely. The needy cry that she let out at the feel of him was all the encouragement he needed to know that she was as desperate for him as he was for her.
"S-Sebastian," she moaned, the sound so erotic he hadn't thought it possible for it to have come from her. "Please — please fuck me. I — need...inside me — please."
Elsie begging. As if he couldn't come undone anymore.
"Anything for you, Princess."
With one abrupt motion, he pushed his hips flush against hers, sliding inside her easily and simultaneously letting out a disgustingly pitiful whimper. He was internally grateful that Ominis had decided to go to breakfast early — he would never have let him live down the sheer humiliation of the chorus of wanting coming from his lips.
Though the doll had been made of wood only moments before, the tight heat of her cunt felt very, very real. It was her body, her silken skin under his fingers, her normally elegant hair mussed and tangled against his bedsheets, and, best of all, her voice crying out his name as he fucked her relentlessly.
"S-Sebastian! Don't — don't stop!"
The high-pitched squeals she refused to hold back egged him on further as he roughly snapped his hips against hers, releasing a low growl as her legs wrapped tightly around him and pulled him deeper into her. The heady scent of her filled his nostrils — the distinct smell of vanilla and jasmine that had so often intoxicated him now enveloped him, and he tucked his head into the crook of her neck to allow himself to be consumed by it.
"Fuck, Elsie. I'm so fucking close."
It was happening too quickly, his release approaching dangerously faster than he would have preferred had this been the real Elsie. He teetered on the precipice of wanting to slow down and make it last longer, to enjoy every sound and feel of her as much as possible, or rewarding himself with what he had been dying to have for so long.
Fuck it — it was Christmas.
She dug her fingernails into his back and muttered a terrifyingly incoherent string of expletives in his ear, but somewhere within them, she was encouraging him to let go.
He was right there, so bloody close now — only a few more thrusts as he selfishly chased down the reality that she was finally, finally his.
"Sebastian!" Yes. Say my name again.
"Sebastian, please!" Just like that, almost there —
"Sebastian, wake up!"
Sebastian's eyes flew open as he sat up abruptly, blinking furiously in an attempt to gather where exactly he was.
Elsie, fully clothed in a Christmas jumper and trousers, her hair in its normal, elegant plait, stared at him from the side of the Undercroft couch, her brows furrowed in concern.
"Are you alright?" She asked worriedly, and her hand softly stroking his arm was almost enough to drag another pathetic groan from his throat. "You were making all these noises in your sleep. It sounded like you were having a nightmare."
Sebastian rubbed his face as reality came crashing down on him like a bucket of ice water. He had been too tired to head back to his common room last night and had fallen asleep in the Undercroft after Elsie had left.
As if to confirm his misfortune, the nutcracker she had gifted him was gingerly tucked under the crook of his arm, still transfigured to look like the girl who currently stood in front of him eyeing him curiously.
He would have laughed at the idea that she referred to his wet dream as a goddamn nightmare had he not still been so fucking hard, left to wrestle with the infuriating ache of incompletion.
Sebastian cleared his throat and muttered a thank Merlin to his last night's self that he had thought to cover himself with a blanket, lest she be subjected to his current state when she had only been trying to check on him and make sure he was okay.
"Uh, yeah. A nightmare," he grumbled, lowering his gaze to hide the heat that was beginning to creep up his neck and along his cheeks. "That's all. M'fine now."
She raised an eyebrow skeptically, and he knew she had good reasons to wonder if he was telling the truth — especially considering he could barely look at her. Not without imagining all of the unholy acts that his dream self had been moments away from —
"I guess the nutcracker didn't help ward off the evil spirits after all," she teased.
The nutcracker. His face reddened further at the memory of Elsie's desperate cries that would forever be branded into his memory.
"Are you sure you're okay?" She reached out to brush her hand along his forehead. "You're looking a bit flushed –"
He smacked her hand away, one touch further from losing himself right in front of her. "I-I'm fine! Just...got a bit warm down here, is all."
It was a blatantly obvious lie, considering he had slept in the Undercroft, which was always perpetually cold. Thankfully, she didn't question him further.
"Well, if you're alright, then get up soon," Elsie said, interrupting his immensely impure thoughts as she turned on her heel to leave. "Ominis is meeting with us outside the Great Hall to exchange gifts." She wagged a finger at him in mock warning, the sly smile on her face reminding him all too much of his dream, and he suppressed another shudder. "And don't be late. A bad back from sleeping on the couch is not a good enough excuse to miss Christmas."
He only offered a curt nod in response.
When the sounds of her footsteps receded, Sebastian flopped back on the couch, once again left alone with his miserable frustrations. The 'Elsie' nutcracker still lay on the couch next to him as if to taunt him, reminding him of what he had been so close to enjoying and what he could never have. He angrily batted it to the floor before grabbing one of the cushions, bringing it to his face, and smothering a mortified, unending scream.
Happy fucking Christmas to me.
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shadamyheadcanons · 1 month ago
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Headcanon #303: Happy Holidays
((This is an idea I’ve had for ages now...and by “ages,” I mean “I wanted to do this during the holiday season last year and I’ve been stuck mulling it over this entire time.” It’s not as detailed as I’d hoped, but it’d be embarrassing if I missed this year, too, so just barely in time for the last day of Hanukkah, here we are!))
Amy makes Christmas cookies for her friends every year, Shadow included. When she stopped by to drop them off one year, she was surprised to find a flurry of activity. Shadow and his Chao, Rosie, were in the process of decorating for both Christmas and Hanukkah. Rosie was in an especially good mood, flying around and practically drenching the house in lights, nutcrackers, and snowman figurines while she hummed a merry rendition of Jingle Bells. She hovered over to drape a wreath around Amy’s neck, clearly intent on decorating literally everything, then nuzzled her and zipped off.
Shadow covered his mantle in a more modest display of blue and white decorations and a collection of dreidels, then approached the door to join Amy. A light jingling noise rang out from his quills as he walked. Amy plucked a tiny sleigh bell from them, only for Rosie to zoom on by and immediately drop another one in to replace it. Shadow shook his head with another jingle, letting her know it wasn’t worth it.
Amy gazed around at the beautiful display, expressing surprise that both holidays were represented. Shadow explained that Gerald and Maria were Jewish, and though his feelings about Gerald were...mixed, it felt right to celebrate all the same. He placed an electric menorah on the mantle. Amy asked if he was using an electric one for safety in case Rosie knocked it over, but Shadow denied it, saying he was more worried about Omega when it came to open flames. Amy couldn’t help but laugh.
Knowing Rouge had already moved out to live with Knuckles on Angel Island, Amy admitted she was surprised to learn Omega was so attached to Christmas.
Shadow just looked confused for a second, but then he shook his head again and told her the decorations were for Rosie, not Omega. When Shadow had gone shopping for his friends, he’d brought Rosie along. Whenever they passed anything related to Christmas, she’d brightened up, visibly thrilled. It wasn’t long before Shadow caught on.
Though he bore no significant interest in the holiday himself, Shadow bought the decorations Rosie was currently gleefully dropping into place, including an entire tree she was deftly hanging ornaments from.
Amy remained silent, eyes wide.
When Rosie flew farther away to nimbly weave a string of green garland around a banister, Shadow leaned in and muttered to Amy, quietly explaining that Rosie had spent time in a lot of houses before he stepped in and adopted her. Although he’d never know for sure, Shadow suspected that she herself had been given as a Christmas gift on more than a few occasions, so she might associate the holiday with excitement and meeting people for the first time. It would have signaled hope and new beginnings for her.
Shadow was determined to prove to Rosie that this time, that hope was there to stay, and so was she.
He’d been gazing up at the stairwell as he spoke, so he was clearly taken off guard when he was met with a tearful Amy. He froze up, but before he had the chance to ask what was wrong, Amy took his hands and started gushing about how sweet it was that he’d go so far for his Chao.
Amy was showering Shadow with compliments, and he was unable to look away, so neither of them noticed Rosie until it was too late. She had enough garland left to circle around them several times, pulling them close together. Both of them yelped in surprise, suddenly finding themselves nose-to-nose, hands still joined. Shadow turned bright red, but Amy tilted her face upward to find Rosie hovering overhead, holding a small green sprig of something above them. Rosie snickered.
Shadow looked upward and choked at what he saw, but Amy just made a confused noise, asking Rosie why she was holding a piece of holly over their heads. Amy climbed out of the tangle and reached up, asking Rosie if she needed help finding a place for it.
Rosie deflated at first, but then she settled for a new game of keepaway, holding it just out of reach while Amy stubbornly hopped around to try and catch it.
Shadow slumped, caught between relief and disappointment.
Amy hugged Shadow and rubbed noses with Rosie, then waved and headed off to deliver the rest of the cookies. Rosie happily munched on one of them, and Shadow crossed his arms and glared disapprovingly, saying she was lucky Amy knew the difference between holly and mistletoe. Rosie giggled and took another bite.
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msfandomsblog · 1 month ago
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Alastor x fem!ballerina-reader
This is my first alastor x reader fic! I don't know how many parts imma make but it will be somewhat a slow burn.
Also this is mostly your backstory
Hope you enjoy!
warnings: use of y/n, being laughed at, implied death, blood, readers insane like Al, guns, suicide, kinda short anddddddd yeah
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In life you were one of the greatest pointe dancer in the world. In death, eh, not so much. Yes you danced but this was simple practice, hell wasn't exactly known for its refined~ practice. Your demon form was simple, you were tall (charlie sized) pale and had small wings on your back. Swan wings, that you could enlarge in and out at your will, not that you usually needed to. You mostly had them compact to your back. Most of your friends wondered why you were in hell to begin with, you were always civil to most characters. There was ofc the off-hand time where you'd threaten any demon who'd dare touch you or close friends, but... who's keeping count!?
As for the reason why you were there well... yes being a dancer had its purks but, it had just as many faults.
More then once at a young age in life you were cast for the villain rolls of dances, plays, etc.
You asked you teachers why and their answer was always, "the way you play it y/n! your body language, face and being on stage! you just do it so well"
As you progressed through as an actress and dancer you were never the 'princess' or the main heroin. Only the dark, cold villain. The black swan, The mouse king, Maleficent. How you longed to be the beauty and not the beast.
Not only did this anger you but soon after a while many other dancers would avoid you because of your 'villain' demeanor on stage. This caused you to grow a hatred for your fellows. It all became too much one day.
It was dress rehearsal, your last one before your last show, and the boys got a wise idea for a prank to play on their black swan. When rehearsing your first entrance you moved over to stage right when suddenly a type of slime/glue pored on you, burning your eyes and ruining your clothes. Then the lead boy shot what looked like a party popper at you but instead of confetti, landed black feathers. The boys were on hunched over laughing, 'childish' you thought while glaring at them.
Every other dancer turned their heads or ran over to see what was oh so funny. Once they all started laughing or turned their head to hide smiles, the director yelled at them all, "oi! that's enough, this isn't a baby recital that you did when you were 5! this isn't mature! Boys, help y/n and run 40 laps around the stage ey?" But it was too late, you'd decided right then and there.
So they saw you as the villain hm? You'd be happy to oblige.
The next day you played your part amazingly well but it was your next audition that excited you. It was for the seasonal part in the nutcracker. As always you were given the part, The mouse king.
When you met the lead playing Clara, the young girl heroin, you saw she was a perfectly civil young dancer. She met her end quickly enough tho.
When you came around to auditioning for The Sleeping Beauty and once again did not get Aurora, you found it quite enjoyable to get rid of the blonde broad that played her.
Then there was Romeo and Juliet. you never did audition for this one, reasons unknown to you. But when you did you somehow found that you felt no sadness you got the email saying that you didn't get the part of Juliet. You instead found joy when you cracked a wide smile as the blood of the girl who did get the part flowed down your hands.
Pretty thing she was, good dancer too. poor thing. ah well.
After about 3 years of of getting away with this little 'hobby; of yours you were found out and surrounded by a large S.W.A.T team. The team leader spoke softly to you.
"Miss y/n, please put your hands up, and drop the gun."
You were so annoyed by this, you'd had to use the damn thing to kill a small African-american girl who was playing Coopelia. You didn't like using guns but this was supposed to be quick. You'd even bought a silencer for the job.
"No officer, I don't think I will." You said back. you smiled as you turned to face the 20 guns pointed at you.
"You won't make it out alive L/n" He said trying to convince you.
"I don't plan on it," And smiling you flipped them off as you shot the gun at your own neck.
OKKKKKKK that was part 1! I hope ya'll like it and stay tuned. I don't know if you could tell but I am ballet dancer, I'm not professional yet but I know quite a bit.
y/n might be oc just a warning but again my first fic sooooo.
Anyway!!!!!! have a good day/night little humans!
part 2!
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littleslaywrites · 1 month ago
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pas de deux- the prince and sugar plum | spencer reid x bau!reader 
pt 4 of pas de deux - based on request by @kakamixoxo
summary: spencer brings your students (and you) gifts after their performance of the nutcracker
word count: 1.2k
cw: f!reader, fluff
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After your week of subbing, your friend had asked you to help teach the little ones their dance for The Nutcracker. She knew you wouldn’t be able to resist, especially after the girls had begged you to visit them again. They were all just old enough for their first year in The Nutcracker as the gingersnaps, and you had been enlisted to be their first introduction to the show.
Growing up, winter doubled as nutcracker season. You’d danced almost every role by the time you graduated college, knowing the show inside and out. Your friend briefly showed you the choreography, simple to accommodate for the beginning dancers. 
Teaching them was a little easier than their regular classes. They understood the excitement of joining the older dancers in a “real” show. You could also coax them into behaving with your own stories of your own past performances.
The girls kept asking for a visit from Mr. Spencer, and after a month of begging, you finally agreed. They had been working hard, so you told Spencer to come by after work. When he walked in the door, the girls cheered, even more excited to see him than you were.
“Can Mr. Spencer learn our dance?” one of your students asked.
“If he agrees to behave,” you say, always looking for a way to tease him. 
The simple steps turned out to be just right for him, and he quickly perfected the skips and little hops. Even the girls were excited about his success, encouraging him in the same way you did for them. 
“Maybe I could perform with you,” he joked at the end of rehearsal. Your students were less enthusiastic about this idea, concluding that he was too tall to blend in with them. As he left, he promised that he’d come see the show. This was perfect, as you could use it as leverage for them to focus whenever they got distracted. You’d remind them that they needed to perform their best as “Mr. Spencer would be in the audience,” which would always make them concentrate.
As you were in the studio, Spencer read the book the ballet was based on. When you were in bed that night, he told you all the differences he found between the show and the origin. You listened intently, savoring his bedtime story. He was truly interested in everything you were passionate about, wanting to learn about everything related to you. 
Eventually, opening night arrived. You opted for a short green dress, and Spencer decided on a red tie to create a festive color scheme between the two of you. Knowing how much you loved the gifts he gave you after all your performances, he’d gone out and bought all your dancers small nutcracker ornaments.
“You look amazing,” he says, kissing you after he’d parked the car outside the theater.
“It feels weird to not be the one performing,” you say. 
You never imagined you could be more nervous in the audience than backstage, but sitting in the theater, you couldn’t help but worry for your girls. You could only imagine how they felt, never having stepped on a stage in front of so many people before. 
Sensing your jitters, Spencer grabs your hand. “They’ll do great,” he says, squeezing, “considering they had a fantastic teacher.” You smile, lightly kissing his cheek. 
The performance goes smoothly, your girls remembering all their steps. Once their part is over, you’re able to relax and enjoy the rest of the second act. The ballet feels like watching a replay of your life, from your first role en pointe as Clara to your last role in college as Sugar Plum.
You rest your head on Spencer’s shoulder during the pas between Sugar Plum and the prince. It seems like the music has taken on another life after you met Spencer. You could always feel the love written into it, but now you understood how it felt to experience it yourself. Spencer feels the same, imagining the two of you as the characters. Even if he couldn’t dance in the literal sense, he’d mastered the routine you had together.
At the end of the show, you make your way to the stage door. When the young dancers see you, they all make a run for you, capturing your legs in a hug. Next, they see Spencer, holding the bag with their gifts in it.
“I’ve got something for you all,” he says, crouching to meet them at their level. “I always get Miss y/n a gift after her performances, so I thought you all should get something, too.”
He pulls out the tiny nutcrackers, and the girls thank him and pull him into a group hug. “Consider this an official apology for distracting you all during class.” The girls giggle, all trying to convince him that he wasn’t a disruption and that he should visit more often.
“Did you know that, according to German folklore, nutcrackers are said to bring good luck?” he says as he hands each girl their ornament.
When all the girls have their gifts and have left to find their parents, Spencer grabs your hand and leads you back to the car. 
“I told you they’d do well,” he says as you climb into the passenger seat. “I know you weren’t actually performing, but I still got you something.” Reaching to the backseat, he pulls out a gift bag and hands it to you.
Inside is a record of the music from The Nutcracker. Spencer knows you collect records, both of your archives merging when you moved in together. 
Next is a pair of earrings, shaped like little nutcrackers. “I thought you could wear them when we come for closing night,” he says. 
“They’re perfect,” you say, “The girls will be obsessed.”
Last is a small white box containing cookies in the shape of snowflakes. You take a bite right away. “It’s good,” you say through your full mouth. Spencer smiles, reaching for one himself.
“I think we should make this a tradition,” Spencer says, taking your hand. 
“I like that idea.” You rub your thumb over his as he drives home, light snowflakes waltzing down to the windshield. 
“I wish I could’ve seen you perform in it.”
“You know, I’m sure my mom has videos of all the shows,” you say. 
“I’d love to see that.” You glance at him to see his bright smile. Love fills you as you see his genuineness, fully interested in watching some old home videos that haven’t been touched by anyone but your parents.
That night, you call your mom, who promises to mail the tapes to you. You put on the new record, letting the music bring back memories of another life. You used to wonder if you’d made the wrong career choice. You’d given up the opportunity to dance professionally after college, choosing a career in the FBI instead. That choice haunted you for a while, but as you stand in the apartment you share with Spencer, you realize where your decision had led you. Ballet will always be a part of you, but it’s not what put Spencer in your life. Looking over at where he sits on the couch, you thank your past self for bringing this life to you.
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theitgirlnetwork · 8 months ago
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Earn It
Ch. 7: Heaven's Happiness
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Note: As always, the love this story receives amazes me. Thank you so much for reading. Thank you for the notes, the reblogs, the comments and messages. Interacting makes this so much fun! I hope you all enjoy this chapter. There will be a lot more time skips from here on out! So you'll all get to know the gang as adults. I will ask that if anyone wants to use my story as inspo for one of your own, or anything else, you let me know, it's more fun that way. I also don't post this or any of my other stuff anywhere else. Once again, hi to my best friend who now reads this story, love you miss girl <3 Anywayyy, I hope you all enjoy! Thanks for reading <3
Taglist:@spookystitchery@anehkael@fkaams@butterflyybabe@sun2flower @holierthancunt @silkenthusiasts @wolflover384 @liziihorta @summerssover @jackierose902109
Warnings: Some strong language
“She’s very gifted, Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock. The best I’ve seen at this age in my career. You could have a professional dancer on your hands.”
The three adults watch from the observing window as Heaven demonstrates Grand Adage for a group of her peers. Her little back straight and stomach tight as she accomplishes the move with a stern discipline that many adults struggle to achieve. 
“We know. So why is she playing Clara?” 
“Beatrice-”
“I’m just wondering, Luca, I mean I just believe it’s our right as her parents to ask Madame Sidorov why our 9 year old daughter is teaching the snowflakes that are twice her age the dance she doesn’t get to be a part of.” 
Madame Sidorov swallows hard as she brings her clipboard to her chest. She’s been running her youth dance company for over 20 years. Many of her dancers have gone on to be successful, working artists. But she’d never seen talent like Heaven Whitlock. The girl came into her studio at the age of 6, excited to show her that she already knew how to go en pointe even though children really shouldn’t and normally couldn’t do it until they were 11. Madame Sidorov had been overcome with excitement. She had a star on her hands. 
The older woman also learned that Beatrice Whitlock also knew what she had. The teacher has dealt with gunner parents before, but none like the stern young woman who trailed in behind her prodigy daughter with her nose in the sky and demands on her tongue. 
“Mrs. Whitlock, Clara is the lead role in the Nutcracker-”
“Bullshit, Sidorov, we both know that the prima dancer role is the Sugar Plum Fairy and the arguably most complicated dance is the Waltz of the Snowflakes, the dance you had my daughter demonstrating yesterday. So,” Beatrice’s heels click as she shifts her weight from one leg to another, hip jutting out. “Why is your best dancer playing the dumb little girl who spends most of the ballet watching everyone else dance?”
“I think my wife is frustrated because we all know our daughter is talented. So we’re having a hard time understanding why those talents aren’t being showcased.” Luca cuts, wrapping an arm around his wife’s waist in an attempt to calm her. 
“Heaven is only 9. We need to allow the older dancers to play the more advanced roles-” 
“Then they should be better.” Beatrice interrupts, swinging her purse over her shoulder, pushing her shades up onto her head. “How about this, until your priorities are straight, we can take Heaven somewhere where things are fair and you can dust off your pointe shoes and start teaching again instead of using my child.”
“But, all of my friends go there.” Heaven whines as they speed their way down the highway for the hour drive back to their home. “I don’t want to find another studio.”
“I know, Stellina, but we want you to have every opportunity. Wouldn’t you want more chances to dance?”
Heaven is stubbornly silent in the backseat, her step father softly pats her foot, reaching back from the driver seat. Her mother turns to face her, a noncommittal look on her face. “Baby, when you came to Mommy a couple years ago, what did you say you wanted to be when you grew up?”
The younger girl bites her lip, tugging irritably at her seatbelt. “A ballerina.”
“Just a ballerina?”
Heaven huffs, crossing her arms over her chest, looking away from her mother. “The best ballerina ever.”
“The best ballerina. Ever. And Mommy and Papino have worked very hard to make that possible for you, yes? Practice everyday, paying for lessons, buying you everything you need. But you’re a big girl now. You’re going to have to learn how to work very hard too if you want to be the best, baby. We can only take you part of the way. You need to think super hard about whether this is what you want. You need to think about if you’re going to earn it.”
Beatrice’s voice is soft and kind, but her words are harsh. She turns around, not waiting for a response from her daughter, satisfied that her whines and complaints had quieted to obedient, stifled little sniffles. 
Heaven stares down at her hands through wet lashes, her bottom lip wobbling as she smothers her sadness. She does want it. She wants to be the best ballerina ever. She is going to be the best ballerina ever. And she’s grateful. Papino and Mommy had given a lot. And she won’t disappoint them. So she’d go to a new dance studio. She would make new friends. And if not, that wasn’t what she was there for. 
Luca Whitlock frowns as he drums his finger on the steering wheel, looking forward at the traffic ahead of them. “How about some ice cream, Stellina? Might cheer you up?” 
Identical sets of brown eyes meet in the rearview mirror. The little girl in the backseat simply sinks against the leather, forcing indifference into her voice. “No thank you, Papino, I’m…not hungry.”
“And you have your, um,” Heaven scratches her head, mentally scrolling through the list of items Tashi would need at home. She was going to spend the first few weeks post-knee surgery with her parents. Heaven had stayed with her girlfriend for the days following the injury, lying to her school and telling them she had a death in the family that required her to take some time away. She just wanted to get Tashi settled before she headed back to UCLA. 
The dancer had assumed that their boyfriend would emerge out of the shadows, and use his charm to weasel out of an apology, ultimately taking over Tashi’s care since he had the most free time.
Unfortunately, he continued to disappoint her. So, instead, she lingered. Slept in Tashi’s bed with her, unwrapped and rewrapped her knee. Cleaned her dorm, brought her any work she missed. The girls in the athletic dorm thought she’d moved in. But now, Tashi’s parents were here to take her home for a little while. 
“I have everything, Hev, you made sure of that.” 
Her heart aches. Tashi sounds so tired. So down. Heaven is so frustrated. She’s ready to move past this part. She wants Tashi to just be better. She tells herself over and over that the surgery would fix it. That once she got the treatment she needs and a little physical therapy, she’d be back to where she was, ready to take over the world with her. 
“I’ll see you when we open, right? You’re still gonna come?” Heaven rocks on her feet, careful not to bump Tashi’s crutch. “You don’t have to, you’ve seen me do most of the dances and I know it might be hard to travel-”
“Babe, I’ll be there. Okay? I need to go.” Tashi lifts Heaven’s chin, giving her a halfhearted peck before turning to climb into her dad’s truck, gesturing for Heaven to stop when she goes to try helping her into the high seated vehicle. “I’ll call you. Why don’t you have Art help you get your stuff from my room? He probably wants to say goodbye.”
“T, are we gonna talk more about that-”
“I told you,” Tashi shrugs, hand on the car door handle, her pajama pants poorly covering the large brace on her knee. “M’not mad. It’s fine.”
It’s not fine. Heaven isn’t stupid. Ever since Tashi and Patrick found out that she’d done…stuff with Art, Patrick has been radio silent, and all Tashi does is encourage Heaven to spend more time with Art who she was decidedly avoiding. She’d gotten…caught up in the infirmary. The combination of the heightened emotions and Art’s soft attention and care caused another moment of weakness. She’d accidentally said something that she’d been denying to herself ever since, and thanking the good lord above that Art had apparently missed. She was determined not to tempt fate for a…fourth time?
Which is why she’d gone back to Tashi’s room and started packing her stuff and straightening up without alerting the blond tennis player who’d been haunting her dreams as of late. And it’s also why she almost pissed herself when he’d somehow materialized in the dorm room doorway, rapping his knuckles against the light wood, in a failed attempt not to startle her.
“I didn’t mean to scare you, but, um, Tashi texted me and said you might need some help getting this stuff to your car.” 
He looks good. She can’t ignore that, but she can refuse to get caught up in staring at him as he leans in the doorway, muscled arms on full display as he leans in the frame, a poorly hidden pout on his face. 
“I’m good.” Heaven shrugs, slinging her bookbag over her shoulder, trying to lift her purse and her other two bags at the same time, only to have all of her belongings fall out of her purse. “Fuck.”
“Fuck, let me help you.” Art bends and starts grabbing the miscellaneous items from her bag.
“I can do it-”
“It’ll be quicker-”
“Art.” She huffs, tucking her hair behind her ears and sitting criss-crossed on the floor. “I meant it, when I said that I was done…Tashi might be trying to teach me a lesson in some kind of twisted way, and I’m sorry you’re getting mixed up in it, but I’m…I can’t be around you and be with her at the same time. Clearly, I can’t handle boundaries.”
“So…so what does that mean? Not talking at all? Is that what you want?” He asks, shoulders dropping, eyes filled with hurt as he inches closer. “Heaven-”
“Sure. If that’s what it takes for it to get you to get I can’t do” she gestures between them. “This, then fine, let’s say that’s what I want.” 
Art clenches his jaw, blinking quickly as he tries to think something he could say. Anything to change her mind. “Heaven, please, I’ll…we’d be friends. We can just, I can’t…please don’t.” he finishes, giving up on trying to articulate his thoughts through his panicked haze. Through all of this back and forth, chasing and running, he’d forgotten the chance that once Patrick was out of the picture, that he might get written out too. 
His eyes scan her face as she shakes her head, shoving the last of her stuff back into her purse and standing. “Art, it’s not like I don’t wanna be around you. But stuff is getting too complicated. This shit is just too much. I haven’t been back to my school in days, Tashi’s leg is fucked and I don’t want to make things any harder for her, Patrick is just fucking gone and I really can’t handle anything more. So when you say we can be friends, I need you to mean it. I need you to tell me we can do that.”
Art finds himself in between a rock and a hard place. He wants to be honest. He wants to acknowledge that he can’t see himself getting over her within the foreseeable future. He wants to tell her that he’s glad she’s probably not with Patrick anymore, and as bad as he feels about Tashi’s leg, he quite frankly does not understand why it has to change anything between them. 
But he’s desperate. Art is humiliated to admit it to himself but, he would do anything to keep the line of communication between him and Heaven open so if he had to appease her by saying that they would be platonic despite the fact that he quite literally gets dizzy standing next to her, fine. Like he’d told himself before, he was playing the long game, collecting the points that matter. So, offering her a tight smile, Art sticks his large hand out to her, encasing her smaller one and jumping to stand at his full height. “Friends. But, friends don’t ignore each other for days, Hev.” 
Heaven bites her lower lip, choosing to ignore the blue-brown eyes that drop to her mouth before looking back up at her and shaking his hand. “Okay. Yeah.” The pair slowly pull their hands apart, Heaven shivers as she feels the calluses on his palm slide across her hand. “As my friend, can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“Is,” the girl rolls her eyes to the ceiling, releasing a heavy sigh. “Is she done? You saw it, and you obviously know more than me…is that something she can keep playing with her knee like that?”
He can’t bring himself to dash the hope she was clearly harboring on the behalf of Tashi but the girl’s recovery is…unlikely. Art tucks his hands in his pockets, tilting his head as he chooses his words carefully. “Tashi’s strong, and really fucking good, if anyone is going to recover from that kind of injury, it’s her.”
“So…no.” Heaven sits down on Tashi’s bed, staring forward at the wall that’s littered with pictures of some of the best tennis players in the world. A shaky breath leaves her as she stares at the professional posters, accompanied by the posters Adidas had made with Tashi on them. 
“You’re a really good girlfriend.” Art whispers.
“I cheated on her with you. I’m pretty much the worst girlfriend ever.”
“No, I mean, you’re really invested in her. In the thing she loves, like you care about tennis the same way we do, f-for her.” 
Heaven smiles softly to herself, grabbing Tashi’s pillow and hugging it to her body. “I fell in love with Tashi watching her play tennis. Just like everyone else does.” she jokes, poking Art’s leg with her toe. “When I’m watching her, it’s like I’m getting to witness something. It’s…corny but tennis is her calling. She goes to some other little world when she’s playing, and, even though I’m not a tennis player, she takes me with her. It’s this feeling of closeness that I can’t get anywhere else, you know?” Or at least, nowhere else I’m willing to talk about.
He does know. Art does know exactly what she’s talking about. He felt it. Once, when he and Patrick sat and watched Tashi play for the first time. It’s an all encompassing feeling. He was so caught up in watching her every move that he hadn’t looked anywhere but at Tashi. If he’d just looked three rows in front of him he’d have seen the girl in front of him now. 
The second time, the feeling was more intense, more of a sensation than a mere feeling. It was when he was sitting in an empty theater, watching Heaven dance, just for him. Art had never felt the things he’d felt before. He’d never had the thoughts he thought. He’d held his breath for the entire minute and 26 seconds that she gave him. He sat on the edge of the red, fabric auditorium seat, scared to blink and get left behind. He wanted to capture the feeling and keep it forever. And he has. He’s kept it. And everytime she gives him another taste, a smile, a kiss, a laugh, a touch, he goes back to being alone in the theater, experiencing euphoria for the very first time. 
If that’s the feeling Tashi gives Heaven, then he’s very jealous. And he wants it.
And that’s another new feeling the girls introduced him to. He’d never wanted something like her…or…uh them. 
Jealousy. Longing. Needing. 
Art knew exactly what Patrick was talking about when he said he liked seeing him fired up about something. Because, as much as he loves tennis, it didn’t make his blood boil. It didn’t make his stomach muscles clench with intensity. He didn’t feel that satisfying nervous burn. Not until…
Art needs to test a theory.
He scratches the back of his head, looking down at his sneakers before clearing his throat. “Uh, so, Hev, I’ve got a match this afternoon. And, I know things are weird right now, so you might think I’m a dick for even asking-”
“Arthur.”
“Come watch me play.” He blurts. Heaven’s eyes widen and he finds himself taking a tentative step forward as if he was trying to soothe a spooked horse. “I don’t know, I just figured…I mean, you might miss watching someone play, with Tashi taking a break and Patrick being…himself.” When Heaven continues to look unsure, Art puts himself out there again, trying to entice her the way he knows how. He moves to stand in front of where she’s seated on the bed, crouching to be just below her level. “When I win it will be for you. I’d like you to be there.” Art carefully tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear, before grabbing her chin between his thumb and index finger, moving her face around playfully. “As a friend.”
As a friend. That’s exactly what Heaven repeats to herself, over and over when she carries her bags over to the tennis courts, placing one foot onto the metal bleacher and opting to sit in the seats down on the front to rows. Just so she can see better. And it’ll be easier to slip out before the match is over. Besides, she couldn’t bring herself to sit with the women’s tennis players towards the top. All she could think of when she saw them was that it should have been one of their legs cracking instead of Tashi’s and it didn’t exactly make her feel like a great person. 
She slips into the seat and crosses her legs, struggling as she pushes her overnight bag under the low seat.
“Hey, let me help you.” A blonde girl crouches beside her, pushing along with Heaven and getting the back underneath. 
“Oh,” Heaven offers her a bright smile. “Thanks, I have to head back to my school after this so I have all my shit with me, didn’t think I was gonna come.”
“No problem,” the girl chirps, plopping down into the seat next to Heaven. “Sara. Myles’ girlfriend, he’s playing after this first match. Whose girlfriend are you?”
Tashi’s name is on the tip of her tongue. She swears it is. But the girl is clearly talking about the players that were starting to filter in, with their red shirts that Heaven could see fitting Art perfectly from her seat. His blond curls flopping as his head moves side to side, she knows he’s looking for her. Heaven gives a soft wave to catch his attention and can’t help but match his smile when he spots her, waving back. “I’m not dating a player.”
“Well these are girlfriend seats, so don’t let anyone else hear you say that.” Sara says lightly, pulling her shades down over her eyes. 
Heaven turns to look at her, tearing her eyes away from Art stretching. “What the hell are girlfriend seats?”
“They’re seats…where girlfriends sit?” The girl sits up to get a pixelated picture of her boyfriend on her razor. “You know, the players’ girls sit, so they can see them. No wonder I don’t recognize you, you’re a plant.”
“I’m Heaven, I don’t go here, I’m just watching my friend before I go back to UCLA.” 
“Oh, shit,” Sara’s eyes widen in realization. “You’re Donaldson’s girl right? Myles’ cousin Kyle, trust me I know the names kill me too, but he was saying how Donaldson brought his hot girlfriend out with them the other night and was dick trying to show off for her.” 
“Again, we’re friends, m’not his girl.”
“Hey, Hev!” Sara ducks her head, watching out of her peripheral as Art jogs over, racket in hand, pushing up onto the fence so he could be eye level with Heaven. “Match is about to start, kiss for good luck?” He grins, holding his racket handle out to her. He playfully pouts until she gives in, leaning forward and pressing her glossed lips to the handle, looking at Art through her lashes. The blond wets his bottom lip and pulls the racket back. “Eyes on me, okay?” 
“Whatever, just remember you promised me a win.” Heaven giggles, crossing her arms as she settles back into her seat. Art beams even wider, hopping down off of the fence and jogging backwards back to where the players sit. “And spit out your gum!”
Faintly, she could hear Art’s teammates reprimanding him for ‘making the rest of them look bad’ and she smiles to herself, bringing a hand up to play with her name chain.
“Girl.” Sara snorts.
“Just friends.”
“Yeah sure.” the blonde girl shrugs, pushing her shades back down. “Don’t tell me, tell Donaldson.”
Art delivers a win, as promised. It wasn’t hard, really. One thing Patrick had gotten right was that college kids weren’t really much competition. And maybe he had some very good motivation sitting out in the crowd with her eyes locked on him. So he showed off a little, served a little harder, made the other guy run a little bit more than necessary. He could always explain that away as wanting to impress his coach and any possible reps looking to endorse him. And sure, he might’ve looked over at her for each point he wrenched out of the poor guy from Temple’s hands but…well he didn’t have an excuse for that other than it gave him a rush knowing that she is sitting pretty, legs crossed, perched with the other girlfriends, watching him, rooting for him, breathing heavy for him. 
When matchpoint is declared his, Art smiles cockily, strolling up to the net and shaking hands with his opponent before making his way over to Heaven again, this time climbing completely over the fence, leaving behind his tennis bag on the opposite side of the court. This time she stands, catching him a little as he lands in the small space in front of her and the fence. “Well?” he pants, lifting his hat to adjust his hair before placing it back on his head. 
“Well, what? You want me to say congratulations?” Heaven grins, sweeping some sweat that dripped from his forehead off of his cheek. “Congratulations, Arthur.” she hums.
“Thank you.”
“Mhm.”
“Yeah,” Sarah calls from her seat, smiling smugly up at the pair. “Good job, Donaldson. Why don’t you try to pass some of that mojo to Myles, huh? Getting kinda tired of coming out to these things just to watch you play.”
“I’ve got a lucky charm, that’s all.” Art nudges Heaven, wrapping an arm around her waist so she doesn’t stumble too far away from him.
“Yeah, so, lucky, or the other guy sucks and Art is good-”
“No, I think you’re my lucky charm, don’t try to ruin it-” Art laughs, taking his hat off again, his messy blond hair falling all over as he places it on Heaven’s head, holding her to him as she squirms.
“Ew, Arthur, it's sweaty!”
“It’s the fruit of my labor, Hev, that win was for you!”
Sarah scoffs, shaking her head as she watches the pair, leaning away to avoid getting hit when Art lifts Heaven, swinging her to the opposite side of him to help her get to the steps before grabbing her bags. As she sees him guide her by her waist down the bleachers, both of them cheesing as they chat as if no one else was there and she realizes that Art is leaving the courts before his fellow teammates play, Sarah commends her own instincts.
And then she makes a note to herself to start saving the returning girlfriend seat next to hers for Heaven. The other girls were sort’ve bitches, anyway.
“So, I should head back.” Heaven leans back against the driver door of her car, clasping her hands together behind her. “But, this got my mind off of things for a little, so thank you.”
“It’s what friends are for.” Art laughs, stepping in front of her, hand behind his neck.
“Pft, you’re such a dick. Aren’t you supposed to be the nice one?”
“I am nice.” he smiles, rocking on his feet, feeling his chest tighten as Heaven bites her rose petal bottom lip again. His eyes soften as he stares down at her delicate features and thinks about how right things feel when they’re together. How he hasn’t felt this good in…ever. “So nice, I’m not gonna say what I want to say. I’m just gonna say,” he takes her hand gently, toying with her fingers, pushing her thumb with his own, “goodnight.”
Heaven’s lips part, and looking up into his eyes, how kindly he looks down at her. What she can see in them almost does it. She almost got lost, just like that. But a buzz in her jacket pocket has her grabbing her phone and the message has her taking a small step backward and placing her hand on her door handle. “Goodbye, Art.”
“One two three, one two three, and Peter please keep up with Heaven, Heaven a little less hatred on your face, thank you, two three and up, I want her in the air-” Madame Fontaine claps her hands to the pace of the movements she wants from her two leads, following them as they move across the floor. Heaven holds her breath as she’s lifted into the air for two counts before she’s slid down Peter’s body, draping herself across him romantically as he kneels to accommodate her. “Yes, that is exactly it. Now kiss.”
Heaven feels herself wince, squeezing her eyes shut as she feels Peter’s lips press against hers.
“Still doesn’t look good, Madame.” Fallon calls from her seat. 
“No, no it doesn’t, does it? You two, what’s the issue, tu veux m'humilier et me faire me suicider ou quoi?”
“No, Madame,” Heaven huffs, swatting Peter’s hand away from her waist. “We don’t want to humiliate you or make you kill yourself, I don’t understand why we have to do the version with the kiss, there are plenty of variations without it-”
“You understood her?” Peter squints at the girl next to him before huffing, “Fine, whatever, MacMillan intended for there to be passion between Romeo and Juliet, and you curl your lip up everytime I kiss you.”
“I don’t like doing it.” Heaven shrugs. “I’m a professional dancer, not a porn star, and I’m playing a 15 year old girl, I don’t know why any sane, adult audience would want to watch me lay on top and kiss a grown man and then kill myself to be with him-”
“We open tonight. We are doing the ballet as we rehearsed, you two will kiss and you will tolerate it. Practice if you must, pretend he’s someone else, take a shot before you do it, I don’t care.”
“Madame, we’re 19.”
“Oh please.” The older woman storms off, her assistant behind her and the two dancers are left side by side. 
“So…should we practice?”
“Absolutely fucking not, thank you very much.” Heaven pushes past Peter, snatching her dance bag from the floor. “You’re gonna practice until your knees bleed for the next hour and then you’re gonna soak in the athletic building so you’re actually ready for tonight and I’m gonna go…I don’t know, pray.” 
As Heaven storms away, dramatically slamming the theater door behind her, she can recognize she was in a bitchy mood. She felt like she had a lot of shit to be annoyed about and was frankly pissed to feel her world collapsing around her on the first night of her first college role in which she’s the fucking prima. 
First, she once again demonstrated to herself that she has absolutely no fucking self control when it comes to Art Donaldson, a truth that she’s learned about herself that really agitates her. She discovered this as she struggled into the routine of only responding to the blond every couple of days and found herself sitting up in the privacy of her own dorm, reading and rereading every message she sent, the bright light of her phone shining brightly on her shame.
Second, she still hadn’t heard from her boyfriend (ex?), Patrick. She’d watched a couple of his matches while she was on the treadmill at the gym and as he does, he wins the first two rounds only to lose in the third. He found time to get lazy in his tennis playing but failed to pick up his goddamn phone and call either of his girlfriends.
Which leads to the third thing haunting her. Tashi is fucking irritable as shit. Apparently, surgery does not agree with her, because Tashi had been crabby for the last few days. It started with the day of Art’s match when she’d sent her perfectly timed message. 'Did he win?' It was like she was taunting her. Like Tashi knew Heaven couldn't stay away. It pisses Heaven off even more that she was right. Then Tashi had moved on to venting about how Patrick was absolutely wasting his talent, how the fact that he’s not winning pisses her off even more now that she can’t play. How she’s going pro as soon as she gets the chance because if this injury told her anything, it was that there was no time to wait. How now that she’s got time on her hands, she’s been thinking more about her plan for her life and Heaven’s.
And lastly, the real kicker, what had Heaven gritting her teeth as she did bar warmups this morning, was that fucking phone call. The one from her mother that she received at 5:00am when she was stretching. The one where her mother said she wouldn’t be able to make it to her first night of her first ballet in college in which she’s the fucking prima. And when she expressed her disappointment, Beatrice responded ‘It’s just a school ballet, I’ll come to your first professional one.’ 
So, yep, she was in a shitty fucking mood. 
But she wouldn’t let all of that stop her debut as an adult dancer. She was going to be a pro, she was going to do it her way, even if the 5 seats she had reserved in the front row were empty. 
So, she sits at the vanity backstage, putting her hair into Juliet’s first hairstyle. She listens to music that reminds her of when she was 15 to get into the right headspace as she puts blush on her cheeks. She offers Peter a soft smile when she sees him in his costume and forces herself to try to look at him the right way. Because the things that are pissing her off don’t matter right now. Right now, all there is is Juliet.
It doesn’t matter if Heaven’s smile is fake as the lights shine down on her when she first prances her way onto the stage. Juliet’s smile is real. It’s meaningless if Heaven’s tears are real when she squints and sees that her mother’s seat is indeed empty, her stepfather attempting to send her a thumbs up to distract from the woman’s absence. And so what, if Heaven can’t go to her happy place as she solos because she sees both Patrick and Tashi’s seats are empty as well. As long as she can still breezily get through her motions, as long as it looks beautiful for the crowd, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t fucking matter.
And it definitely doesn’t matter, that as she came out of her fake balcony in her sleep gown to blow everyone’s minds with the most loving, fucking passionate pas de deux they’d ever seen, she accidentally caught eyes with Art in the audience, staring up at her intensely. 
So she doesn’t have to feel guilty that when she kissed Peter, she envisioned him with curly blond hair and heterochromatic eyes. Or the fact that Madame Fontaine told her when she stepped off stage to change into her next costume that it was the most romantic, realistic kiss she’d ever seen.
Does Art know he's stupid? Absolutely. He's never dared call himself intelligent. He didn't need the little voice that sounds like Patrick calling him pussywhipped. He knows. But, he still found himself on the highway, traveling at a breakneck speed, eyeing the bouquet of flowers that he has placed in the seat.
He'd known Heaven was serious about this whole friend thing. She's so good, and kind. And she cares so much about Tashi and Patrick. But Art knows he can treat her better. He's sure of it. Despite what he knows to be true, Art refuses to pressure her...anymore. He'd just rely on the fact that if they were supposed to be together like he believed they should be, they would be. Eventually. Soon. Hopefully.
So he came fully ready to play the dutiful friend. He was gonna stand politely by as Heaven leapt into Patrick's arms after the show. Art was gonna smile politely as she and Tashi shared kisses and exchanged giggles as they talked about inside jokes that they only understood. But then he got there. He'd been directed to the front where the two premier dancers families were arranged to sit and found three empty seats separating him from a man with peppered hair and smart looking glasses who had his own bouquet of flowers across his lap and a Chanel gift bag next to his feet. As he inches into his seat the man looks at him with a smile.
"You must be Patrick. I'm Heaven's stepfather, Luca Whitlock, I'm sorry I missed you at her birthday." The older man holds his hand out to Art with a kind smile. "Nice to meet you."
Art offers him his own awkward grin, accepting the tight squeeze of the man's hand. "Uh, no, I'm Heaven's friend, Art. It's really nice to meet you Mr. Whitlock."
"You as well." The man lifts his wrist to check his watch. "Show is meant to start in a few minutes, hopefully he will be here shortly. Stellina won't like for her boyfriend to be late.
Art shifts uncomfortably again, checking his phone. Patrick had reached out to him a couple days after Tashi's injuries. Mostly to make insults thinly veiled as jokes, clearly still pissed that he yelled at him. Art responded with short, one worded messages.
It's the least they'd ever spoken since they'd met.
The guilt he feels for his part in this fight they were having is very real. But it was currently heavily outweighed by his annoyance at the fact that his friend was seemingly punishing Heaven by not showing up for her big night. He knew Patrick didn't deserve her, and he was only proving his point.
"Is Tashi with Mrs. Whitlock or..."
"Oh, my, my wife couldn't make it. And Tashi is still...healing. Her mother called right before I was supposed to pick her up."
Oh. "Oh."
As much as he's glad he could be here for Heaven, he knows that Tashi and her mother being there would mean more. His heart aches for her as he settles back into his seat and the lights dim. The pain he feels for her only intensifies when he sees her step out onto the stage. She's beautiful. The perfect Juliet. If anyone would make a man fall in love within a few glances, ready to die at the thought of not being with her, Heaven would be it.
Her eyes are sad as she eyes the empty seats, using them as a tragic point of focus as she completes her expert turns. Behind him he could hear people whispering about how gorgeous the girl playing Juliet was, how talented she is. All Art can think is that they have no idea. They don't know how she's managing to be so elegant, so beautiful, so perfect, even as she's in the type of pain she's in.
Art would do anything to bring the light back into her eyes so they would shine the way the rest of her was.
He loves her.
He knows it. He feels it as her eyes finally make their way to his seat and her smile is a little more real. A little bit of light slips back into her eyes. She dances even more beautifully, more genuinely than before. And his mind is filled with the same thought.
Yes baby, that's right. Eyes on me. I'll make it better. I'll make you happy.
And he means it. Friends or not. Lovers or not.
It's on Heaven's first night of her first ballet in college where she's the fucking prima ballerina that Art makes a vow to himself.
He was gonna dedicate himself to Heaven Whitlock's happiness. No matter what that meant.
3 Years Later (California)(Age: 22):
Tashi shakes her head to herself as she watches Art pace in the kitchen. She brings her coffee to her lips, blowing at the smoke slowly as she observes him from the couch, taking a small sip before setting the mug loudly on the glass coffee table. She rolls her eyes when he doesn’t stop his steadily paced steps across the floor.  “You good?”
The blond finally pauses to look at her, jaw clenching and unclenching before he opens his mouth to speak. “This is just different, you know?”
“How? It’s still tennis.” 
“It’s pros, Tashi, I’m just nervous.” Art says, running his hand through his blond curls. “These guys are good.”
“You’re fucking good.” She asserts, crossing her arms. “Look, I can’t make you believe in yourself. If you can’t do this, please, let me know now, because I need to know if you’re not going to make this happen. We have a deal.” 
Art sighs, planting his hands down on the counter, staring down at the scattered marble with a frown as he tries to get out of his head. Suddenly, he feels a hand slide across his back and an envelope lands on the counter between his hands, into his line of sight.
“Something for you to consider while you decide if you’re gonna fuckin’ play like I know you can.”
With that, Tashi storms out, heels clicking on the hotel room floor and the door beeping as it slams shut behind her. Art stares down at the envelope, reading and rereading the name of the sender.His heart both clenches and races as he thinks about what the 4 little words on the small, insignificant piece of paper could mean for him. How those 4 words and whatever they’re hiding behind them will ruin his life. 
The Paris Opera Ballet
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us3rnam3-r3dact3d · 1 month ago
Text
when i met you (i couldn't measure it)
Ao3 | 2.2k Words | Treasure's POV
(A Firefigher AU one shot)
Over Solaire’s shoulder, a younger man stood, his cool, grey eyes fixed on you. When your eyes met his, his face split into a smile, all straight, perfect, white teeth. You flicked your gaze over his features. High cheekbones, perfect, light hair, a maroon suit that was fitted so tightly around his tiny waist you worried his jacket button would pop if he breathed too hard.
His smile gleamed in the soft house lights, just a bit too sharp.
__
Treasure hates opening nights. William loves the ballet. Porter bums a smoke.
TW: Smoking, shitty friends.
Lil ballet info for you guys: Treasure intentionally dances androgynous parts, ones that both male and female dancers have done in the past. They're noted as playing Clara's younger brother Fritz in their youth (a part I actually got to do once as a little kid) that is often danced by young girls OR young boys. In this production, they're part of the Mouse Army and they dance Coffee, which often has both male and female dancers. While they are noted as dancing en pointe, male dancers have been known to wear pointe shoes on occasion. So really, Treasure's gender is fully up to your interpretation still.
As another note, I used more modern names for the different dances ("Coffee" instead of the "Arabian Dance," "Tea" instead of the "Chinese Dance) since I fully believe that if you can't produce Nutcracker without being weird and racist then you just aren't productive. I saw a wonderful production in which the dancers were in costumes that mimicked the drink or treat they represented instead of loosely racist caricatures. That is the vibe for Treasure's production.
Opening night was always your least favorite performance. There was some vicious, clawing energy that you couldn’t direct, an unpredictability that you didn’t care for. When a show was well run, when you had danced it four or five times in front of an audience and knew the lines of the marley floor, what parts were raised and awkward, slick and worn, you could dance without thinking. That was always your favorite part of it, when your conscious thought could drift away and your body took over. 
Dancing was never about your brain. It was about your body. 
Nutcracker was a touch different. You danced it nearly every year, so the motions of it were never new, just distant enough to be unfamiliar. You had to settle back into the feeling of them, stretching across your skin and muscles. You danced the Mice Army, you danced Coffee or Tea or Peppermint. If it was your lucky year, you’d be tapped for the Grand Pas de Deux and dance your feet raw for six performances before the company went on break for the season. 
It was not your lucky year. A combination of guest dancers and principal promotions left you, the ugly duckling of Dahlia Ballet’s professional company, taking a backseat to the pretty young things that got paraded around in snowflakes. 
You hated opening nights, especially when said opening night heralded a visit from the Ballet’s biggest benefactor. Benefactor sounded very 19th century, but there really wasn’t another word for what William Solaire was to the place. He put more money into the Ballet in charitable donations than the rest of the donors combined, and he had standing season tickets. 
He only came once a year, though, on the opening night of Nutcracker, and took up the empty orchestra box that waited, empty for his return.  
Solaire was set to visit the stage before the performance, and your CEO and artistic director were busy entertaining his weird, rich guy bullshit. You could feel the nervous energy of everybody in the building as you ran through the motions of Coffee one more time before you were called for costumes. 
“He brought someone!” Bridget wacked you with her extended tondeuse, the box of her pointe shoe digging painfully into your hip. You turned sharply, falling out of your formation, and fixed her a pointed look. “Oh shut up, look! He’s hot!” You rolled your eyes and turned, distinctly aware of how little time you had to nail this before you had to move on. Coffee could be a challenging dance; languid and slow, mimicking the twisting steam over a fresh cup. Slow didn’t mean easy. It meant that every inch of your body had to be in your control. It meant that you didn’t get the forgiveness of speed when you fucked up. Fucking up wasn’t an option. 
You flexed and pointed your feet, rose up to releve en pointe, turned in an agonizing circle with your leg in a front attitude. Your shoe caught on an uneven section of the stage. You fell to your heel, raised your head to get your bearings to remember the spot. 
Somebody was watching you. You were a performer. Your body knew when there were eyes on you. You spun your head around until you saw him. 
William Solaire was talking excitedly to the artistic director, motioning to the set dressings with a light in his face. He looked trim and handsome in his tailored tux, and his eyes were fixed with rapt attention on his enthusiastic, if anxious, conversation partners. 
You looked to his right and found the source of your discomfort. Over Solaire’s shoulder, a younger man stood, his cool, grey eyes fixed on you. When your eyes met his, his face split into a smile, all straight, perfect, white teeth. You flicked your gaze over his features. High cheekbones, perfect, light hair, a maroon suit that was fitted so tightly around his tiny waist you worried his jacket button would pop if he breathed too hard. 
His smile gleamed in the soft house lights, just a bit too sharp. 
“Oh my God,” Bridget wacked you with her foot again, “he’s totally looking at me!” 
You turned back to stare at her, your face screwed up in distaste. 
“Jesus Christ.” You snapped. “Are you blind? Are you incapable of turning without kicking me? Should I just move a foot downstage so save myself the bruise?” 
“You don’t have to be an asshole.” Bridget pouted, crossing her arms. She tugged at the hem of her leotard, only serving to prop her bust up even more prominently. She waggled her fingers towards Solaire’s shadow with a grin before turning back to you. “You are such a buzzkill.” 
You huffed, frustrated, and ran a hand over your face before remembering that you already had your stage make-up on. You’d smeared your blush. 
“Fuck me.” You sighed. 
Opening night was always your least favorite performance. Bridget was a bitch, but she was an impeccable dancer. You fell out of a pirouette after four rotations that she took to five. She did lick you twice during Coffee, and she forgot during the battle scene that the toy soldiers and mice were only meant to play fight. You were certain the wack she gave to your ribs with her wooden sword would bruise. 
You hated opening night, but you loved Nutcracker. You always had, since you played Fritz at seven. You sat in the wings and watched the Grand Pas de Deux, counted the Sugar Plum Fairy’s rotations as Cavelier spun her like a top. 
Those fuckers. They were good. Better than you. So was Bridget. So was every other principal dancer in the company. You were falling behind. Plateauing. 
During bows, your eyes drifted to that perpetually empty box to stage right. William Solaire was on his feet, his face lit up in childlike joy, clapping incessantly as the principals took another bow. To his right, just over his shoulder, his mysterious shadow stood as well, clapping slowly, languidly. His eyes were locked on you until the curtain fell. 
Your castmates broke into laughter and applause, cheers and congratulations spread through the softly lit stage. You turned, popped en pointe to stretch out your right hip. Someone caught your elbow and spun you around.  
“You’ve got to get it together on that turn.”  Bridget bitched, her arms crossed over her chest. “You’re embarrassing me.” 
You blinked back at her, shock smacked across your face. The world of ballet could be a cruel, unforgiving one. People often spoke directly and without care for emotions, only results. It shouldn’t have surprised you when she decided to make her point in this particular fashion rather than talk to your director or find a nicer way to get it across. You could appreciate her being up front, at the very least. 
“New marley.” You said, tapping your toe against the stage. “New shoes. New show. I haven’t danced Coffee in like… three years. I’ll be fine tomorrow.” 
Bridget narrowed her eyes at you, her delicate features contorting unflatteringly around a frown. 
“I don’t make excuses.” She bit out. “And I don’t fuck up. So…” 
Another dancer caught her shoulder and she turned, falling naturally into the cheer and jubilation of the post-show. She only spared you one more look before disappearing into the crowd of retiring dancers. 
You made your way to the dressing room, only lingering long enough to snag your coat and lighter before retreating again. It was fucking cold outside and it was probably in your best interest to at least change out of your shoes before you went out for a smoke, but you thought that if you spent another second around everybody’s chatter and laughter and fucking noise you’d actually go insane. 
The costume for Coffee didn’t provide the most cover from the elements. It included a pair of sheer, flowy pains and a skimpy vest that barely covered your chest. You shivered as you planted your back against the back wall of the theater and tugged a cigarette from your pack. Fuck, you were running low. You’d have to stop on the way home. Of course. 
“Can I bum one?” A smooth, british voice called from your right. You jumped, alarmed, and turned.
It was Solaire’s shadow, the handsome, blonde man that had spent the entire night intensely staring you down. You were usually off put by guys that stared, but something about him didn’t set off the alarm bells in your head. 
“Its my last one.” You grumbled, pulled your pack back out. Your hands were fucking freezing, and you shook as you attempted to flick your lights. Thin, cool hands spread over yours, plucked the lighter and both cigarettes from between your fingers. 
“Cheers. You were wonderful, by the way.” The man smiled as he brought both cigarettes to his lips, lit them with the same flame, and took the first, bitter drag before passing one back to you. You pressed it between your lips, wet with his saliva, and breathed in deeply. It warmed you up inside almost immediately. 
“I was alright.” You sighed, smoke obscuring the stranger’s face. You introduced yourself, hand extended. He took it in his, but instead of shaking it, he brought your knuckles to his lips and pressed a kiss to them. It would have been corny if it was anybody else, but something about him was so earnest that you blushed, hot and high in your cheeks, up your neck, the tips of your ears. 
“Porter Solaire.” He supplied, stepping back and resting against the cold brick wall. He had a long, black peacoat over his shoulders, leaving his arms free from its heavy sleeves. Even though he had very little cover from the cold, he didn’t shiver or shake, seemingly unbothered by the winter chill. “And I mean it. I don’t give compliments lightly. I couldn’t take my eyes off of you.” 
“I was the weakest dancer up there tonight.” You huffed, tapping the filter of your cigarette against your lips in thought. “I’m not conventional. I don’t have the training that the other principal dancers do.” 
Porter snickered, looking down at you out of the corner of his eye. 
“Something funny?” You sneered. Embarrassment crept up your chest and into your throat, turning you mean. You hated that about yourself. 
“No.” Porter said softly. “No, it’s just… I don’t give a damn about ballet. It’s the old man’s favorite, I just got dragged along tonight. But every time you were on stage, I was enraptured. I have no idea if you’re a good dancer, but what I do know is that you’re… something.” 
The way he said something sounded dangerous. You wanted to watch his mouth form around the word a few more times. 
The back door creaked open. Bridget stuck her head out into the cold. 
“We’re going to get drinks.” She snapped. “Like… six of us? How big is your car? You can DD, right?” 
“I was about to leave.” You said, gesturing with your half-finished cigarette. 
“Oh, come on.” Bridget said. “It’s enough of a mood killer that you refuse to have a drink, the least you can do is come with. It’s opening night! Come and celebrate with us!” 
“It doesn’t sound much like they’ll be celebrating.” Porter’s voice rose up from behind you. You half turned to look at him. Smoke twirled around him lazily, languidly, twisting tondeuse and attitude turns around his sharp, pretty features. “More like… babysitting.” 
“Oh!” Bridget straightened when she saw him, puffing up her chest in her skimpy Coffee top. Porter’s eyes trailed over her body, but the light that sparked in his grey irises when he looked at you was absent. His eyes took on a sharp, cutting energy that made you shiver. “Hey, you’re with… with Mr. Solaire, right? Do you want to… come along?” She put on her most devastating smile, looking up at him through her lashes. Porter looked down at her, blinked slowly twice before turning his eyes back to you. 
“Do you have dinner plans?” He asked, his face and eyes lighting up. “There’s a lovely little Indonesian place around the corner.”
You looked over to Bridget, who was starting up at Porter like he’d spit at her. Her pretty face was twisted up in disbelief. 
“That sounds great.” You said decisively. “Let me go change and get this shit off of my face.” Porter gave you a sly, curling smile. 
“I’m not complaining about the costume.” His eyes slid to Bridget for a moment, as if to check that she was still watching. The corner of his smile quirked up as his attention fell back to you. One cold hand spread up your exposed ribs as the other snaked under your chin and tilted your face towards his. His thumb traced your jaw, those sharp eyes meeting yours for just a moment before he ducked down. 
His hands were cold, but his lips were warm. Soft and plush, you melted into the feeling of them. Warmth bloomed in your chest. You leaned into him, hand falling to hold onto the lapel of his stupid, fancy suit. Smoke passed between your mouths, acrid, bitter, so fucking warm. 
Bridget was gone by the time you came up for air. 
“Your friends suck.” Porter smiled into your mouth. He didn’t let you go. His cold hands began to warm on your skin. 
“Not my friends.” You snorted. “Coworkers at best. Take me to get Indonesian.” 
“As you wish.” Porter grinned.
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born-to-lose-writing · 1 month ago
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How Christmas Is Supposed to Be
Pairing: old!Slash x reader
Requested by @being-worthy
Summary: When Slash finds out Christmas used to be your favorite holiday until it became just another day, he goes all out to make your first Christmas together special.
Tags: fluff, Christmas
Words: 923
A/N: Two years after it was requested, I finally wrote it 🙏🏻 I was planning to write more Christmas fics this time, but I'm so happy I finished this at least
Tag list: @warriorteam1924 @slashscowboyboots @losers-yurio @lost-in-the-80s @jennyggggrrr @tuffduff @jonesyownsmyheart @smells-like-perfect-senses @whered0wego @rumoured-whispers @stradlin-cold-heartbreaker @gloomy-blonde @cherry-jams (let me know if you want to be taken off the list)
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For once before the holidays, you had a weekend with a chance to relax, so you and Slash decided to look through some old photo albums. If you weren't going to celebrate Christmas as much as Slash used to when his children were younger, you were still going to experience some nostalgia.
You were familiar with many of Slash's photos starting from his late teenage years, partially because you had seen them back when all he was to you was one of the best guitarists around and not your boyfriend, partially because he had shown them to you before.
Still, there were quite a few that were new to you, such as the ones in his childhood albums. Obviously, there were pictures together with some celebrities his mother had been friends or worked with, and while you were a little jealous he had gotten to meet so many icons as a kid, what caught your attention even more were his baby photos.
“Aww,” you cooed, pouting and pointing at an especially adorable photo of him at the tender age of 10 months. “You were so cute! What happened?”
He knew you were only teasing him and laughed. “58 years passing, that's what happened. You don't find me cute anymore?” he feigned hurt.
“I’d say you're sexy now,” you replied, giving him a kiss on the jaw. “But still cute.”
You pinched his cheek before returning to the photo album on your lap, turning the page to some more baby pictures of him. It was truly heartwarming.
In the meantime, Slash picked up one of your photo albums. He laid the one on top to the side when he read the words 'Christmas Part 1’ on the next album and ‘Christmas Part 2’ written on the cover underneath.
“You really loved Christmas, huh?” Slash smirked, opening the first one to see a picture of you as a toddler sitting under an icy blue and silver decorated tree. You were having a present in front of you, looking up at the camera as if you had been interrupted while tearing open the wrapping.
“Yeah,” you admitted, a melancholic smile on your face as you looked at the pictures together. “It was the thing I looked forward to the most as a kid, but over time it became just another day, you know? When I started studying and working, things got more stressful and I couldn't get into the Christmas spirit anymore.”
Slash wrapped his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer. “I’ll help you get in the holiday mood again, that's a promise.”
As usual, he kept his promise and when you came home from a long day of work on Monday, the wreath on the front door was the first hint at what you could expect inside.
You opened the door and spotted fairy lights along the door frames, green and red garlands leading up the railings of the staircase, candle arches in the windows, a life-sized nutcracker next to the backyard door, a snow globe on the coffee table in the entrance hall, mistletoe above every door and many more decorations you had almost forgotten about but reminded you of what your family used to put up years ago.
As you set foot in the living room, the scent of pine filled the air before you could even see the tree itself, bringing back memories from when you had gotten home from school and immediately felt cheered up by the scent of Christmas, no matter how your day had been. It was large and almost reached the ceiling, though just short enough to put a tree topper on, but it was not yet decorated.
Suddenly, Slash appeared from behind the tree, grinning when he saw you. “Oh, hello! Do you want to help me? I just bought some decorations, I hope you like them.”
You walked over to him and saw the boxes of ornaments, candles and tinsel on the floor. You genuinely liked them, but even if they hadn't been your style, you would have loved them for his effort alone.
“I went a bit overboard as you probably noticed already,” he chuckled. “And there’s still more waiting to be put up in the next couple of days. I got colored fairy lights for outside the house too.”
Smiling, you turned around and wrapped your arms around his neck. “I love it. And I love you.”
“I love you too,” Slash said and kissed you. “I thought I'd leave some for you because having other people decorate everything is boring.”
You nodded and took a bauble out of the bubble wrap, hanging it on a branch. Then, Slash joined in but took enough time to let you choose the placements of most ornaments, which you appreciated. He had already succeeded in getting you into the Christmas mood when you had come home to a fully decorated house, but it only now started to feel like the holidays you had loved so much when you had been younger. It felt simply magical, the only thing missing was baking gingerbread—and being lifted up to put the last piece on top.
Slash seemed to read your mind as once you were finished with the ornaments and the tinsel, he handed you the big gold angel and grabbed you by the waist, lifting you high enough to place it on top of the tree. When he put you back down, he spun you around once, making you giggle. “Let’s put on some Christmas music, shall we?”
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creators-club · 3 months ago
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Welcome to the first '24 Days of Christmas' event for the Creators’ Club. Every holiday, we plan to have a custom event planned. For Christmas, we are hosting a prompt event.
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Prompts:
Day 1:
Holiday Words: snow, reindeer, fireplace Holiday Phrase: "All is calm, all is bright."
Day 2:
Holiday Words: mistletoe, stockings, cocoa Holiday Phrase: "Home for the holidays."
Day 3:
Holiday Words: garland, sleigh, twinkle Holiday Phrase: "A winter wonderland."
Day 4:
Holiday Words: chimney, bells, frosty Holiday Phrase: "Silent night, holy night."
Day 5:
Holiday Words: candy cane, ribbon, wreath Holiday Phrase: "Deck the halls with boughs of holly."
Day 6:
Holiday Words: eggnog, Santa, frost Holiday Phrase: "Naughty or nice?"
Day 7:
Holiday Words: nutcracker, sugarplum, scarf Holiday Phrase: "‘Tis the season to be jolly."
Day 8:
Holiday Words: sleigh bells, gift, evergreen Holiday Phrase: "Over the river and through the woods."
Day 9:
Holiday Words: carolers, snowflake, gingerbread Holiday Phrase: "Do you hear what I hear?"
Day 10:
Holiday Words: poinsettia, icicle, peppermint Holiday Phrase: "Walking in a winter wonderland."
Day 11:
Holiday Words: elf, chimney, mittens Holiday Phrase: "Underneath the mistletoe."
Day 12:
Holiday Words: ornament, pinecone, sleigh ride Holiday Phrase: "Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow."
Day 13:
Holiday Words: candy, cocoa, snowfall Holiday Phrase: "Rockin’ around the Christmas tree."
Day 14:
Holiday Words: holly, lights, cheer Holiday Phrase: "It’s the most wonderful time of the year."
Day 15:
Holiday Words: ribbon, present, sparkles Holiday Phrase: "Have yourself a merry little Christmas."
Day 16:
Holiday Words: star, tree, joy Holiday Phrase: "Peace on Earth, goodwill to all."
Day 17:
Holiday Words: tinsel, cookies, glitter Holiday Phrase: "Oh, what fun it is to ride."
Day 18:
Holiday Words: wrapping paper, icicle, marshmallows Holiday Phrase: "On a cold winter’s night."
Day 19:
Holiday Words: snowman, jingle, candy cane Holiday Phrase: "Making spirits bright."
Day 20:
Holiday Words: lantern, cider, log Holiday Phrase: "Bringing tidings of comfort and joy."
Day 21:
Holiday Words: snow globe, sled, chocolate Holiday Phrase: "Under the sparkling lights."
Day 22:
Holiday Words: angel, melody, starry Holiday Phrase: "A child is born."
Day 23:
Holiday Words: gingerbread, carol, magic Holiday Phrase: "Let your heart be light."
Day 24:
Holiday Words: holly, miracle, velvet Holiday Phrase: "As the world awaits Christmas morn."
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Guidelines Under the Read More
The 24 Days of Christmas Writing Challenge will officially run from December 1st to December 24th, giving participants the chance to immerse themselves in a festive creative journey. To provide a head start, participants can begin brainstorming and drafting as early as November 18th, though official entries will be accepted only during the event dates.
All submissions must include the hashtag #cc24DaysofChristmas to ensure they are recognized as part of the event. During this time, there will be no regular Creators Club events, allowing members to fully focus on this unique challenge.
All submissions written by followers who are not on the tag list will be featured under user: guest.
Submissions must be entirely original, as AI-generated content is strictly prohibited.
All submissions must be, at least, 100 words.
Each day, a new prompt will be shared, offering participants inspiration to create something festive and engaging. While writers are encouraged to follow the prompts in order, they may use them as flexible starting points for their work.
You do not need to use all the prompts for the day. Just use as much as you need to get the juices flowing.
While there is no strict word limit, all entries should demonstrate thought and effort.
Collaborative entries are welcome, provided all collaborators adhere to the same guidelines.
If you have any questions, please feel free to send @creators-club a question.
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@bardic-tales @megandaisy9 @watermeezer @littleshopofchaos
@kricketbee
@themaradwrites @pinkevilwriter
@serenofroses @asirensrage @aalinaaaaaa @goldenlilium-ocs @glbettwrites
@wyked-ao3 @badscientist @thebadphilosopher @andromedalestrange
@fantastictrashpolice @seastarblue @happypup-kitcat24 @chickensarentcheap @allaboutmagic
@ryns-ramblings @kathaliabloodyrose @riemmetric @andromedaexists @kckramer
@tales-from-nocturnaliss @pastelpinkhobbies @idonthaveapenname @the-bar-sinister @rosesonkittens
@bloodred2023 @kanobarlowe @aquixoticwrites @new-royston-cursebreakers
@rosemirmir @salmonandfox @fablesandfragments @paganmindidnothingwrong @elshells
@viscerawrites @ellowynthenotking @dawsonskyelar @greenapplespider
@edupunkn00b @the-duke-of-nuts @exclawshou @karkkidoeswriting @meerawrites
@theglitchywriterboi @mayarab @memento-morianon @mrsmungus
@pebblesfromtheshore
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lostgirlmuseum · 1 year ago
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The Swan and the Soldier
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^made w/ pinterest
Pairing: tfatws!Bucky x f!dancer!reader
Summary: Bucky is signed up to act in the Nutcracker against his will. But it isn’t all bad. At least not after he meets the cute costume designer. 
Words: 5.6k (oops)
Warnings: Mention of an injury + brief description of pain, poor writing at times, lemme know if I missed anything
A/N: I really hope this isn't complete dog shit
(Dividers by me😎)
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“You want me to what?”
Bucky dropped his sandwich back onto his plate.
“I was gonna do it but I’m too busy to make every rehearsal.”
Bucky had been staying in Louisiana for the past month, finally taking a break from going from fight to fight. Sam encouraged him to stay with him at Sarah’s place, which Bucky did for a while, but after a couple of weeks, he decided to rent his own place. He was still near to Sam, and was at his house nearly every day, seeing as he was only a fifteen-minute drive away. Bucky just felt like less of a burden this way. 
“And I’m not busy?” Bucky countered, staring at Sam from across the kitchen table, where they were taking a quick lunch break before getting back to the boat.
“Well—” 
“Shut up.”
“It would mean so much to AJ. It’s his first dance recital and I think he would be a lot less nervous if someone he knew was on stage with him.”
“I’m not a ballerina, Sam.”
“You don’t have to be!” He quickly uttered, putting down his own sandwich. “They just need a couple of parent volunteers to step in and play the adults at the beginning of the show.”
“I haven’t liked dancing since the 40’s. And I don’t know how I feel about being on stage. Would I have to wear a costume?”
“It’s the Nutcracker.” Sam raised an eyebrow and gave Bucky a judgmental once over. “I don’t think it fits the show to have you dressed like an angsty motorcyclist.”
“Sam, I don’t think I can—”
“Uncle Bucky!” A cheerful voice entered the room as AJ came bounding up to the table.
“Hey, kid,” Bucky smiled, giving the boy a quick fist bump. 
“Uncle Sam told me you would be a part of my recital!”
“He said what now?”
“What?” AJ asked, oblivious.
“Nothing, I—AJ, could you give Uncle Sam and me a second?”
AJ nodded and skipped back outside into the sun. Bucky glared over at Sam.
“So maybe I jumped the gun a bit…”
“Samuel.”
“You can say no,”
“You know I can’t say no now!” Bucky flung his hands out, exasperated. 
“You can! You’ll just disappoint him. But if that’s what you want to do—” Sam trailed off, taking a bite out of his turkey and provolone. 
“This is manipulation.”
“Is it working?” Sam mumbled and swallowed.
Bucky shook his head and stared at his plate. “You owe me.”
“Big time! Promise.”
“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” Bucky mumbled, planting his face in his palms.
“Rehearsals are Tuesdays and Thursdays,” Sam got up from the table and grabbed his now empty plate, “you’re making the kid really happy.”
“Yeah, yeah. To be clear, I am doing this for him. Not you. I don’t give a shit about you.” He pointed.
“Love you too, Buddy.” 
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Bucky found himself that very Thursday at the ballet studio, in a small group of parents, as a petite young woman—well, she looked about 60, but compared to Bucky, she was young—introduced herself, a southern accent clear in her cheery tone.
“Welcome parents and volunteers! Most of you already know me, but I’m Ms. Cindy, the head of this program and this year’s Nutcracker! I’d like to start by thanking all of you for taking time out of your busy schedules to be here and support us and your children. It’s you who keep this dance studio up and running, and I’m so grateful for that. Throughout today, you’ll each get called to get your measurements taken so we can be sure that the costumes are ready before the performance. And as for roles, we’ll figure that out at the end of class. I have to go teach the little ones, but feel free to take a seat and watch the choreography your students have been learning all season!”
Bucky followed the others, who seemed to already be acquainted with each other, into a small observing room attached to the studio where AJ was practicing. Bucky stuck himself in the back corner and watched AJ through the one-sided mirror for only a couple of minutes when his name was suddenly called.
“James Barnes?” 
Bucky looked up to see a woman standing in the doorway. He ignored the glances that turned his way as he followed the woman out the door.
Did they know who he was? Did they know what he had done? Or maybe they had no idea. Maybe they were judging him for not engaging with them in polite conversation, maybe they thought he was weird for hiding silently in the corner. 
Bucky pushed the thoughts out of his head as the (attractive, he might add,) woman opened the door for him into a new room. It wasn’t huge, but it wasn’t a closet either, and Bucky immediately noted the lines of clothing racks stuffed with colorful dresses that lined the walls.
“I just need to get your measurements quickly for your costume. I can take them now, or if you’re more comfortable, I can send you a list of measurements I need and you can get those numbers to me on Thursday if you’d prefer.” 
Bucky thought for a moment. He wasn’t entirely sure how to take his own measurements, and he sure as hell did not want Sam of all people helping him. On the other hand, having a stranger so close to him sounds embarrassing and stressful. But he saw the kindness in her eyes, and oddly enough, he felt he could trust her.
“Now is fine."
“Sounds good.” She gave the sweetest smile he had ever seen and told him where to stand. He took off his jacket with ease, feeling somewhat comfortable knowing he had a long-sleeved shirt under to hide his metal arm. He kept his leather gloves on, and she said nothing.
She demonstrated to him how to hold his arm, and he obeyed, holding his right arm out and bent at the elbow. She chatted as she brought the tape measure along his arm. “Which kid is yours?”
“Oh, none of them.” 
He noticed the subtle tilt of her head.
“I mean, I’m not a dad, but I’m AJ’s uncle. Well, a friend of his uncle but,”
Luckily, she stopped his ramble before he could truly embarrass himself.
“Oh, you’re Bucky?” She dropped the tape to her side and smiled. “I’ve met Sam a couple times, but I’ve heard all about you and him from Sarah.”
“Oh? All good things I hope?” 
He asked in a lighthearted tone, but in reality, he was terrified of the things she’d heard about him.
“Only good things.” She grinned and grabbed the pencil behind her ear to scribble a number on a chart.
“That’s a relief.” His eyes scanned the room, trying to think up conversation to fill the silence. “So are you a parent volunteer?”
“Not a parent, no. I used to be a part of this program growing up. It’s done so much for me, and I wanted to stay connected, so I help out here and there when I can. I mostly fit the costumes.”
“That’s cool.” 
Cool. Cool. Cool response Bucky. Ask her a question, dammit.
“Do you still dance?”
“Not anymore. Can you put both arms out to the side please?” She asked, and Bucky lifted his arms so she could measure his chest. She continued to make conversation as she wrapped the tape around him. “AJ is a great student. He has a lot of potential, he just needs to find his confidence. And he’s a great kid. You’re a lucky uncle.”
“I am,” Bucky responded, trying desperately to not freak out at how close she was to him, and how she was only going lower, as she moved to his waist.
She took a break to write down a couple more numbers and returned to him.
“Now I need a hip measurement, so I have to measure around your butt. Is that okay?”
Bucky gave a convincing nod. “Do what you gotta do.”
‘Do what you gotta do’? What the hell am I saying?
He avoided looking at her and held his breath as she brought the tape around his hips.
“Just a couple more measurements and you’ll be out of here,” she assured, dropping the tape from his hips. “You can put your arms down now.”
Bucky let his arms rest at his sides.
She quickly went about measuring his legs and finished a couple of minutes later.
“You’re all good to go, Mr. Barnes, thank you!” 
“You can call me Bucky,” he tried to hide his bashful smile and started to exit out the door, but stopped and turned at the last moment. “What was your name again?”
“Oh, I’m Y/N.” 
“It was nice to meet you, Y/N.” 
He liked the way it felt on his tongue. With that, he said goodbye and returned to the observing room.
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Thirty minutes later class was nearly over. All that was left on the agenda for the day was to form the groups.
“So it seems we have an odd number…Lois, is this everyone?” Ms. Cindy asked, looking over to her assistant.
“Everyone that signed up, yes.” Lois, a shorter girl with an auburn bob, tapped on a clipboard.
“Let’s just see how this goes. Mr. and Mrs. Tudor will be group one, Mr. and Mrs. Malone will be group two, Mrs. and Mrs. Cardoza will be group three, and that leaves Mr. Barnes…”
“We could have him be a single parent to his group?” Lois offered, looking up from her list.
“We could, but then who would he dance with at the party scene?”
Bucky swore he saw a literal lightbulb light up above Ms. Cindy’s head as her gaze fixated somewhere in the back of the room where you were simply passing by.
“Oh, Y/N? Dear?” She called in a uniquely falsetto voice.
“Yes, Ms. Cindy?” Y/N answered, pausing.
“I realize you’re already doing our costumes, but would you be interested in volunteering as one of the parents? We are short a person.”
“Oh, um…”
“You can think about it Dear. It’s no trouble if you feel that it’ll take up too much time, we appreciate you for your dedication to the costumes.” Ms. Cindy was careful to add.
Despite her initial hesitance, Y/N spoke up.
“I can do it.”
“Are you sure?” Ms. Cindy blinked, surprised by the answer.
“Yeah,” she breathed, “yes. I’ve already got measurements, all I need to do is submit an order. And I can’t tailor anything anyways until the shipment comes in.”
“A round of applause for our beautiful and dedicated Y/N, everyone!” Ms. Cindy cheered and began clapping her hands in a circle. The parents all joined in, and Bucky gave a quiet few claps. “That means Mr. Barnes and Y/N will play the fourth couple. Splendid!”
Lois tapped Ms. Cindy on the shoulder and pointed to her watch. Time was almost up. Ms. Cindy was fast to get back to business.
“Now let’s quickly assign each group their children, and then we can end rehearsal.”
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“Buck, I’ve got some good news.” Sam’s voice flowed through Bucky’s phone.
It was Tuesday morning, and Bucky had been up and dressed since seven in the morning, eager to pick AJ up, even though class wasn’t until 5 p.m. He was currently lying on the couch, watching the clock tick by.
“What, you finally learned to use the potty like a big boy?” Bucky mocked.
“It was one time. ONE. TIME. You know I don’t fuck with clowns!”
“I don’t like clowns either, but you don’t see me shitting myself at the Halloween Festival.” Bucky quietly chuckled.
“First of all, I didn’t ‘shit’ myself. I peed. A little. And second of all, I had a lot of hot chocolate beforehand, and my bladder was at max capacity, and—why the hell am I explaining this to you?”
“Because you know I’m never going to let you live it down.”
“Moving on,” Sam sighed, “I was calling to tell you that you don’t need to be in the performance with AJ anymore.”
Bucky shot up from his lying position. “What do you mean?”
“My schedule freed up a bunch so I can take AJ and be in the show now.”
“Oh.”
Bucky slumped back onto the cushions, dejection dripping from his voice. Sam clearly picked up on it.
“What do you mean, ‘Oh’? I thought this was good news for you. I know I forced it onto you and all, and your thing isn’t really being on stage in front of a bunch of people.”
Bucky picked at the edges of his fingers, carefully considering his next words.
“I mean it’s not my thing, but—I don’t know, I feel like I’ve committed. And I get to spend some time with AJ, y’know? And, truth be told, it’s not all bad.”
There was a pause on the line before Sam’s voice rang through.
“That’s awfully sweet Buck. And very out of character for you.”
“Shut the fuck up, I can be nice.”
“Yes, of course. Bucky Barnes, the world’s famous sweetheart, how could I forget?”
“I’m hanging up now,” Bucky warned.
“Bye, metal man.”
“Fuck off bird brain.” Bucky was about to hang up, but quickly added in a serious tone, “I’ll be there this afternoon to pick AJ up.”
“You’re a good man.”
“Whatever.”
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“Welcome back everybody!” Ms. Cindy’s high voice rang. “We are going to practice the beginning of the show where the families enter the party. We’ll take it group by group, so let’s start with group one, the Tudors. Your family is super excited for this party, so we’ll have you enter stage right and I need the children to be skipping and bubbly.”
Ms. Cindy instructed the groups one by one. Eventually, she got to Bucky’s group, which he shared with you and four kids, including AJ.
“And our final group, group four, is the family that does not want to attend. The parents should be trying to get the kids to smile, and at least act like they are happy to be there.”
Bucky let you take the lead and simply followed what you did. He walked beside you, stopped when you stopped, turned when you turned.
“Good, now make it look like you are trying to get the kids to smile.”
Bucky copied the way you pointed to your cheery smile and did his best to ignore the embarrassment bubbling in his chest. 
The comically grumpy—and much better actors than him—kids sighed and plastered on cheery expressions. 
“Good, and you can continue walking.” Ms. Cindy ordered.
Group four finished the short trek across the stage successfully. For such a simple task, Bucky had felt surprisingly nervous. 
Ms. Cindy quickly gave her praise and ordered everyone to start over. As Bucky and his group were going back to the line, she offered some advice.
“Y/N and Mr. Barnes, could you try holding hands? You don’t look as ‘coupley’ as everyone else.”
Bucky gulped. Of course you don’t look as ‘coupley’ as everyone else, all the other couples are actually couples, and married for God’s sake!
You, on the other hand, simply said “Okay.”
“Group one, go,” Ms. Cindy called, and the Tudors began to cross the makeshift stage.
The line moved forward, and Bucky with it. He began to sweat a little. 
Hold your hand? With my left hand? My metal hand?
She simply glanced at him and gave him a small smile.
“And group two,” Ms. Cindy called.
Everyone stepped forward.
The good news is that Bucky was wearing his gloves, but surely she’d notice his hand felt different and think he was weird. Although, did she already know about his arm situation? She did mention that she’d heard about him and Sam from Sarah. Maybe she already knew, and wouldn’t care?
“Group three!”
Bucky looked back at the kids trailing behind him and spotted AJ beaming right back at him. Suddenly, Bucky felt ridiculous. 
Bucky, you’re being an idiot. Be a man and hold her hand. It’s not that deep. You’re doing this for AJ.
“And four,”
He grabbed her hand and started to walk with her. The first thing he noticed was how small her hand felt in his. It gave him an unfamiliar tingly feeling in his chest. He wasn’t sure he liked it, but it was better than anxiety.
He tried his best to puff out his chest and mimic her confidence as they walked. Bucky stopped halfway through, like they were supposed to, and turned to face the kids like last time. He pretended to point to his smile and finished the walk across the stage.
“Excellent! Let’s move on.”
Bucky managed to make it through the entire class without sweating his clothes off from nerves. 
“You ready to go, AJ?” 
AJ yelped, “Wait! I want you to meet one of my friends!” He dramatically waved over to a little girl with a sunflower barrette in her hair who came skipping over. “This is Ava.”
“Hi, Ava.” Bucky gave an awkward smile.
The little girl looked up at him unphased. 
“Hi, Mr. Bucky. So are you really a superhero?”
Straight to the point, huh? “Oh—um,”
“He is!” AJ butted in, “He’s friends with my Uncle Sam, they save the world all the time!”
Ava crossed her arms across her chest and jutted a leg out.
“So can you fly?” She squinted.
“Nope, I can’t fly.” Bucky began to rub the back of his neck.
“Can’t your Uncle Sam fly?” She asked, looking at AJ with skepticism.
“Yep!”
“So if you can’t fly, what can you do?”
Before Bucky could even begin to stutter, Y/N appeared.
“Hey, Ava! I think your mom is looking for you.” She said, placing a hand on the girl's shoulder.
“Okay, I gotta go. Bye AJ,” Ava quickly spouted and ran off towards the doors.
“Bye!” AJ shouted.
Bucky noticed Y/N holding his blue cap out to him.
“I think you forgot your hat.” She spoke softly. 
“Didn’t even realize, thanks.”
“It’s no problem, Bucky.”
Bucky was about to give a lopsided grin when AJ interjected,
“Only friends and family call him that.”
“Oh, I’m sorry! James, then.” She brought her hand to her cheek.
“No, no, Bucky is fine,” Bucky quickly corrected, “you can call me Bucky.”
“You’re sure? I don’t mean to overstep,”
“You aren’t, I like it when you call me Bucky.” 
He instantly felt his cheeks get warm at his confession. Before she could respond, he quickly changed the subject.
“Oh, by the way, I wanted to let you know that I can’t be here at the next rehearsal. AJ will be here, but I completely forgot that I’ve got an appointment that day.” A monthly check-in with Dr. Raynor that he forgot to move. “I don’t know if you want me to meet somewhere instead, or I can just come early on Tuesday and you can catch me up to speed or…I mean whatever you think is best.”
“If you want, we can meet on Friday at my place. I can send you the address if you’d like?”
“Yeah, yes, sure, let me get my phone—” he fumbled while grabbing it out of his pocket, “what’s your number?”
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“Hey, come on in!” Y/N appeared behind the crisp white door of a cute house, not unlike the Wilson’s, and gestured inside before grimacing. “Sorry, I should’ve asked before, are you cool with dogs?”
Bucky nodded.
She gave a sigh of relief and fully opened the door. Bucky couldn’t help but smile at the graying corgi staring back at him.
“This is Frank,” Y/N said, bending down to bring the panting dog into her arms.
“Hi, Frank.” Bucky greeted, giving the dog gentle pets with his right hand. “Your house is lovely,” he added after catching a glance around.
“Oh, thanks!” She smiled, walking into the living room area to set the dog down on the couch. “This is actually my parent’s house, I’m just house and dog sitting for the week while they’re out of town. Usually, I live in my apartment.”
“Is this where you grew up?” Bucky asked, eyes searching the place. He noted the multitude of picture frames lining the wall and the slightly worn couch.
“The first eighteen years of my life. I told myself I’d be out of Louisiana by the time I went to college, but clearly that didn’t happen.” 
“Where did you want to go?”
“New York, San Francisco, I don’t know, maybe even Australia or France.” she laughed at the absurdity and sighed. “C’est la vie,” 
Bucky stuck his thumbs in his pockets and stared down at his feet, unsure of what to do next.
“Can I get you anything? Water? Iced Tea? I can make some coffee. Are you hungry?”
“Just water is fine,”
“Sure, one second.”
Bucky took the opportunity to explore the room. His curiosity was set on the shelf beside the fireplace, and the multitude of shiny awards it adorned. 
Several faux gold figures of ballerinas and a plaque filled the space, as well as what looked to be a photo album. Bucky thought better than to touch it, however, he did notice the significant lack of dust on it compared to the trophies. 
“I see the obnoxious shrine of my dancing days has caught your attention.”
Bucky spun around, cheeks a little pink at the notion of being caught wandering. He was looking for the right thing to say as you took a seat on the couch and placed the water on the coasters.
“Looks like you’re an amazing dancer.” He nodded, hoping that it was the appropriate thing to say.
She ducked her head at the compliment. “I was okay.” She pointed to just beyond his shoulder at the photo album. “You can look at it if you want,” she offered, clearly sensing his curiosity.
Bucky grabbed the binder from its spot on the shelf and took a seat next to her. He slowly opened the book to the first page. 
There you were, 4 years old in a bright pink tutu, beaming at the camera. The page was covered in cute stickers and artistic swirls. 
“My mom has a knack for crafty things,” she said, vaguely gesturing to the book.
Bucky hummed and began to gingerly flip through the pages. It was odd but endearing seeing you change through each photo and page, but one thing that stayed constant was your eyes. In every photo they had the same sparkle, the same light. It looked so right on you, but he didn’t recognize it in you now.
Bucky stopped on the page dedicated to age 17 and marveled at the costume you were wearing. He couldn’t look away from the intricate feathers and sequins.
“That was for our Spring production of Swan Lake.”
Bucky turned to see a subtle smile on her lips. She was looking at the book, but it seemed as if she was seeing right through it.
“You were the swan?”
“Odette, yeah.”
Bucky turned the page once more, except this time there was no photo—just the outline of where one would be on a mostly blank page, minus the glittering bold number “18”.
“Anyway, the choreography,” she quickly chimed, her attitude dramatically changing, “I’ve got the video right here, we can watch it first.”
She snatched the album up and placed it back on the shelf before handing him her phone. Bucky watched the thirty-second clip of two of the volunteers—possibly the Tudors if he remembered correctly—as they danced a shockingly simple routine.
“That’s it?” He cocked an eyebrow. 
“That’s it.” She assured. “Ready to try it?”
“I might be a little rusty, it’s been a while since I’ve danced.”
She turned on the music and started counting under her breath.
They started by facing each other, their right palms in front of them, and placed against each other. They both took a step in, a step out and circled around the other to which they were now in the opposite places. She curtsied, he bowed, and then they repeated the step in, step out, switch. Now they stood next to each other, and she held her arm out over his. They took three steps forward, and the music grew into a faster tempo.
“Easy enough?” Y/N asked, grabbing her phone to stop the music.
It was suspiciously simple, Bucky thought, but then again, the adults were just a small addition to the show. It’s really about the kids.
“We can make this more interesting.” He remarked.
“What do you mean?”
“Let’s try it again.” Bucky gestured to her phone.
She obliged and restarted the music.
They went through the routine again, all the way to the end at which the music began to speed up. As Y/N went to pause the music again, Bucky grabbed her arm and pulled her in. She gave a surprised gasp, but Bucky wasn’t regretful once he saw the smile on her face. He pulled himself back and began to spin her around and basked in her soft laughs. After pulling her back in again, and dancing around each other, he dipped her. She wrapped her right leg around him in response and he hoped she didn’t notice his smirk transform into a blush. 
“Alright Mr. ‘I might be a little rusty’, someone has moves!” 
Bucky helped her up once she removed her leg. 
“I used to be better,” he mumbled.
“None of that,” she softly chided, bringing his chin up, “where did that confidence just go?”
Bucky shook his head. “I’ll keep practicing, then you’ll see,” he simpered.
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Time went on and not a day went by that Bucky didn’t think of you. After weeks of practice, it was finally dress rehearsal. Bucky was surprisingly calm even though they were no longer practicing in a studio, but in the local high school’s theater, in full costume. You held his hand through it—literally, for some parts—and Bucky was grateful for it.
It was Friday night, the final rehearsal before the show the next day, and Bucky was just about to drive off when he realized how cold his hand felt against the steering wheel. He cursed himself and ran back inside, luckily finding his leather gloves sitting on a chair in the wings of the stage. Right as he was about to scamper off, he noticed a figure at the very front of center stage. He recognized her immediately, and without a second thought, he approached from the darkness of the sides and into the light of the stage. She had already changed out of her ballgown and was back in black leggings.
“Hey.” He uttered, slowly taking a seat next to her at the end of the stage. He let his legs dangle over the edge.
“Hey,” she gasped, bringing a hand to her heart. “Sorry, I thought everyone had left.”
“I forgot my gloves.” 
“Seems like you have a habit of forgetting things,” she teased.
“Only when it comes to clothing, apparently.”
“Is AJ not waiting for you?”
“No, he left with a friend. He’s got a sleepover with Marshall tonight.”
“Gotcha.”
A thoughtful quiet settled over them, but Bucky couldn’t ignore the somberness in her eyes, gazing over the expanse of empty velvet seats.
“Can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”
“Shoot.”
“Why’d you stop dancing?”
She was quiet for a minute. Bucky started to think she wasn’t going to answer, but eventually, she whispered,
“I didn’t have much of a choice.”
She began mindlessly rubbing her knee.
“I tore my ACL my senior year. It was our annual production of The Nutcracker and I was cast as the Sugar Plum Fairy. There was a rumor that some influential talent scouts were going to be attending. So when my knee started hurting I ignored it. I didn’t tell anyone. I worked my ass off and pushed myself harder when I really should have been resting, but I was stupid.” She gave Bucky a short glance. “Opening night came, and so did my solo. Everything was going fine until I heard a pop. Next thing I know my leg is on fucking fire and I’m hitting the ground.
“I embarrassed myself and our entire company. My knee took longer to heal than it should have because of more poor choices I made. What should have been nine months of healing turned into years. By the time it was safe enough to start dancing again, it was too late. I was too far behind my peers. Even still I sometimes have issues with it.”
Bucky simply nodded, taking in her words.
“I tell myself I’m over it because it was so long ago. But deep down I know I’m not. I’ve asked my parents to take down all of my stupid awards, at least store them away somewhere, because it’s just some sick reminder of what I lost. Actually, the whole reason I started volunteering in the first place is because my mom told me I should. Said it could be good for me. She never said so, but I really think she was hoping that by being surrounded by ballet again, I would feel motivated to begin training again. But it’s a pipe dream.”
She took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling.
“All I ever was was a dancer. And a good one. It was the only thing I was good at, besides sewing, but I only learned that after I injured myself. The whole town knew me as the dancer. I guess the problem with having my entire identity wrapped around one thing is that when that thing goes away…well, who are you? Who am I, if not the girl who’s going to be on the stage one day? My entire identity was ripped from me.
“I’ve just been wading through life. Time keeps moving and crashing around me, but I haven’t changed. I still don’t know who I am, besides the girl who could’ve been great. And now I’m just—stuck.”
Her eyes went wide for a second before squeezing them shut as if she had forgotten she wasn’t alone.
“God, I’m so sorry, you didn’t need to know all of that—”
“No, I—” Bucky stopped her and hesitated to rest his hand on hers. “I can empathize. I hate that you had to go through that. That you’re still going through it. I can understand not knowing who you are anymore.
“A long time ago, I used to be someone else. I used to be charming, independent… happy. But after I was drafted my identity was no longer my own. I was a fighter. I belonged to the army. And then I belonged to Hydra. And even after, I belonged to the Avengers, the world, whoever needed me to fight, I was their soldier. But I’m tired.” At those words, Bucky slumped. “I don’t want to fight anymore. But I have no fucking clue who I am if not a soldier. I’ve been trying to figure that out.”
“I can’t tell you who you are,” she whispered after a moment, “but I can tell you that whoever you are, I like you.” 
Bucky blushed.
“I like you too. It’s kind of embarrassing actually,”
“What is?”
“I didn’t really want to volunteer for this. Sam forced me. And while I love being here for AJ, I’d much rather hang out with him outside the theater where I’m not expected to be looked at on stage. But then I met this pretty costume designer…and suddenly it wasn’t so bad.”
“Pretty?” She asked, tilting her head.
“Beautiful. Absolutely gorgeous.” He specified.
“What a coincidence. I also met the most handsome and charming man recently.”
“Charming?”
“He doesn’t realize how charming he is. I guess that’s part of his charm.”
“He sounds great.” He turned to face her more directly. “Just to be clear, you are talking about me, yes?”
“Yes, you oaf.” She laughed.
Bucky pursed his lips.
“Would you be willing to let this oaf take you out on a date sometime?”
“More than willing.”
“That’s a relief,” he sighed, falling back onto the stage. “I figured it was 50/50.”
She gave him a silly grin and shook her head in amusement.
“You underestimate yourself, Bucky Barnes.”
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The final performance was perfect. Well, as perfect as it could be with a production of the Nutcracker with dancers ages ranging from 6 to 106. Most importantly, AJ had fun and did a fantastic job. After the show and final bows, Sarah, Sam, and Cass came rushing onto the stage to congratulate AJ (and Bucky of course. Sam made sure to tell him that he was very proud of how brave he was, and Bucky rolled his eyes. He secretly appreciated it, though.) Cass handed one bouquet to his little brother and the other to his uncle, who funny enough lit up in a similar way as his nephew at the gift. But Y/N lit up the most when Sarah handed a third bouquet to her.
“For keeping Bucky in line, and giving a beautiful performance,” Sarah clarified.
“You’re so sweet,” she beamed, pulling Sarah in for a quick hug. “I have the perfect vase for this.”
“Can we go get ice cream now?” AJ jumped. 
“Let’s get you out of your costume first,” Sam said and gave a quick wink to Bucky before herding his sister and Nephews backstage. “We’ll see you by the car Buck.”
Bucky nodded and turned his full attention to Y/N. He felt weirdly high after the performance. “Wanna join us for ice cream?” He asked, placing his hands on her waist.
“Gladly.” She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck.
I like dancing with you.
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A/N: If you've made it this far, tysm for reading!!! I really hope this doesn't suck complete ass, idk what happened 😰 Im going to go hide in a hole now and question everything
If you'd like to read more, here's my Masterlist
Happy holidays!
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