#i understand that they were just angry ranting and the post broke containment which is why im not saying anything there. but damn.
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squarerice · 3 months ago
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debated putting this in the tags/reblogs of the post i saw but it's not that serious and i don't want to bother op on a two year old rant post that broke containment. but you can't criticize booktok for lacking literacy and in the same breath say that colleen hoover has published 46 books since 2015 "according to google." that is just blatantly untrue. google is a text scraper, not a source. if you cross reference wikipedia and her own website you can count a total of 20 full length novels, plus 3 novellas, plus a three-part novella series that has been compiled into one book. that's 24 books published 2012-2022 (when op was made). that is HALF of what that op claimed was true AND i'm including a longer timespan. they weren't off by just one or two but TWENTY-TWO books because they took "google" as a source. and they want to talk about literacy among the general population? seriously?
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icequeenbae · 4 years ago
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Stay with Me (m) | BBH
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Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader
Long-distance relationship, established relationship, grumpy Baek, smut
Warnings: explicit content, unprotected sex, upset sex (is there such a thing), oral (f receiving), consent is not explicitly stated but implied
Word Count: ~2.6k
Summary: Baekhyun was upset because you had to leave again. His frustration made things escalate to an unexpected extent. He might’ve just wanted to make you late for the plane though.
© Please do not copy/ post on other platforms without permission.
Let’s celebrate my first ‘writing comeback’ anniversary together ❀❀❀  [February 17, 2020 – forever]
Author’s Note: Soooo
 This was actually the first fic I wrote after many years of my writer’s coma. Wasn’t going to post it, but it’s important to save the date. A year ago during a business trip I was listening to Baekhyun’s ‘Stay Up’ in the backseat of a cab, and it suddenly got to me in a very new and profound way. As soon as I got to the hotel, the doc was created. Countless sleepless nights later, I can admit that I haven’t really stopped writing ever since.
Baekhyun isn’t just my bias or my favourite character to write, he’s so much more special to me than that. I’m not sure how long this journey is going to last or where it leads me, but so far he’s gifted me with one full year of this magic. He’ll always have a precious spot in my heart đŸ€
Okay, done with the sappy times now (no). As usual – big thanks to @baekshoney​​​ for having a look, and I hope you guys enjoy this little oneshot!
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This was one of those days. One of the days you hated, and Baekhyun didn’t do much to make it better for you. On the contrary, he was sulking since early morning. First, because you’d left him alone in bed and he woke up being cold. Then he just kept getting annoyed with everything. Why were you having coffee for breakfast again, when you should sleep on the plane? Why weren’t you packing snacks, when the airport food always made your stomach upset? You should’ve definitely worn one of his hoodies, since none of yours were warm and comfy enough, did he have to remind you?
Yes, this was the day you had to fly back home, leaving him behind once again. Which was exactly what brought his tsundere ways to the surface. He was just
 upset.
‘Baby, it’s not the first time I’m going home, I’ll be fine,’ you grinned at his grumpy expression and poured him a cup of coffee as soon as he sat his butt down on the kitchen stool.
Baekhyun wasn’t exactly subtle in how he felt about you going away. The two of you had been doing this ‘long-distance thing’ since the very beginning of your relationship. You’d met during your first ever trip to Korea around two years ago and instantly clicked – just like that – not spending a single day without at least a quick message exchange with one another.
It was tough at times. There was no way for you to see each other more frequently, and you were often apart for months. Granted, you were keeping in touch religiously – texting every single day, having video calls every other night (whenever you could manage the schedules and time zones), posting ambiguous pictures on social media only for each other to understand. Still, you missed each other so terribly

‘I don’t understand why you have to go anyway, you can just stay here with me,’ Baekhyun grumbled, eyeing the kitchen floor with a frown. You pursed your lips to contain the coo about to fly out of your mouth at how cute he was, pouting and complaining. Like an angry little bird. Before you could stop yourself, you reached out your hand and ruffled his already messy bedroom hair.
The way his nose scrunched up meant he wasn't in the mood to be playful. You sighed and leaned on the corner of the kitchen table.
‘You know I have work to get back to, Bae, I can’t be on vacation all year long.’
He was being rather childish about your departure, especially when you were already fully dressed and ready to go. The only thing stalling you was that Chanyeol, who insisted on being your ride to the airport today, hadn’t come to pick you up just yet, giving you some time to smooth over your boyfriend’s feathers.
Truth be told, you were only holding up the appearances for him. It was very possible that you were even more upset about having to go than he was. In fact, every time your week or two together were nearing an end, you felt nauseous at the thought that you wouldn’t be able to see his face, or hold his hand, or feel his warm breath on your skin, or kiss the tiny mole on his cheek.
In all honesty, you were... a mess. You only displayed yourself as calm and collected during your goodbyes because you knew his moodiness was merely a tactic to conceal his pain. So, you tucked your own feelings away to make it a bit more manageable for him. In reality, you broke down as soon as you arrived home and walked into your lifeless apartment. Each time, you had to find excuses and avoid talking to him via video messengers during those initial weeks, pretending to suddenly be swamped at work. You realized that seeing your eyes all red and puffy from crying every night would most definitely break his heart and worsen his longing. That you knew, because seeing him unhappy was excruciating. You wanted more than anything to deliver him from any further suffering.
It took all of your self-restraint not to reach out for his warm embrace or let the tears flow freely. He’d probably not let you go then, always telling you to just stay with him anyways. But you were both adults and had commitments, although hundreds and thousands of miles apart.
As your eyes were beginning to prick from observing his state and getting overwhelmed with your own feelings, you decided it was safer to move out ten minutes early, despite the call from Yeol not coming through yet. Anything to not let Baekhyun see you cry or cling to him desperately the way you wished to in that moment.
‘Well, you can pout all you want, I’m going to get my stuff,’ you said in an airy tone trying to elevate his mood slightly.
‘No.’
He stopped you in your tracks, grabbing your wrist. You gazed at him, confused as to what he meant. He was still looking down, eyebrows knitted together and chest heaving with almost anxious breaths.
‘Bae?’
‘No,’ he repeated, softer this time, but still not making eye contact with you. Instead, he tugged at your wrist and pulled you closer to him. You felt his grasp weaken until your wrist was free, however, your waist was not. His arms snaked around it, and he pulled you into himself, basically nuzzling his face into your chest.
‘Baekhyun?’ You squeaked, doing your best to fight off the goosebumps that littered your skin immediately after the contact. Your body never once asked for permission to react to him, and this time was no exception. His right hand traveled down your spine to the curve of your ass as his nose nudged one of your breasts. You shivered, grabbing at his shoulders, and he suddenly growled, knowing, sensing that your nipples had already perked up underneath the fabric of your bra.
Although he was trying to put you into one of his many oversized hoodies all the time, it was summer, so you were wearing a sundress (like any sane person would). Lucky for Baekhyun, this type of clothing made it even easier for him.
He rose from his seat and hoisted you up so abruptly that you only managed to yelp and grab at his neck for balance. You were then placed on the empty side of the dining table away from the leftover breakfast. Looking down at where your boyfriend’s hands were, you watched him frantically pull your dress up, before coming to your senses and trying to stop him.
‘Bae
 What are you doing? Yeol is gonna be here any minute, we can’t just f
ugh!’ You cried out in surprise as he yanked your hips forcefully up to his face, completely ignoring your words. There’s no way he was going to...
‘Baekhyunie, please stop, you know I’m going to be late, what is
’ He didn’t even let you finish your rant, leaving a trail of insistent wet kisses upon the sensitive skin along the panty line while leading up to your protruding hip bone. Breath caught up in your throat, you couldn’t get the rest of the sentence out even if you wanted to. Did you really want to? With his head right there between your thighs, his dark burning eyes looking at you – completely immobilized by him – in the most intense and intimate way possible. His lips were glistening after he ran his tongue over them habitually, and when he leaned in and licked at your still clothed center, you belatedly realized that you weren’t even breathing. The realization only came with the wheezing gasp you’d let out, when your legs wrapped around his head as if on cue. Like fuel to the fire, your responsiveness only spurred him on. You didn’t even have time to realize that your boyfriend had already moved your panties out of the way when his impatient lips were on you again.
‘B- Baekhyun
’ You muttered, reaching your hand down to give pushing his head away a feeble try. ‘We can’t do this now, please stop... the airport
’
His ears seemed deaf to your reluctant pleas as he only employed more of his tongue to make you lose the last bits of your sober mind completely, melting and thrashing underneath his touch. He eased one of your thighs off of his shoulder, pushing it up and spreading you out before diving back in, paying no attention to your increasingly disheveled state.
At this point you could only sob, speech incoherent, all attempts to push him away or close your legs futile. And that alone made him grow feverish with the need to be inside you, to feel you once again before he had to let you go.
He was really good with his mouth, as usual, so by the time one of his hands left your thigh to tease you a little further with his long deft fingers you were so ready to take more that you barely registered the burn of two digits sliding inside. You were still a little sore from the night before, which you’d spent making love for hours on end, knowing that you won’t be touching each other anytime soon. But that was meaningless now.
His tongue expertly swirled around your clit, while his wrist found a familiar angle that always made you get vocal. Your back arched instantly as you cried out his name, barely grasping that you were still tugging at his soft locks and possibly causing discomfort. It was clear that your release was mere seconds away with your legs shaking and inner muscles clenching, and that was exactly where Baekhyun wanted you. Aching for his touch, needing him as much as he needed you. Just the two of you, caught up in the act of lustful desperation.
He’d worked his tongue diligently, almost pushing you over the edge by sucking on your most sensitive spot for just a second, and... then you suddenly felt him pull away.
‘No, no- what?’ You could barely form sentences, let alone complain, but your frenzied tone made his already rock-hard flesh twitch. His pants were down in seconds, and there wasn’t even a thought of pausing to get a condom on or cool off a little bit. You were both on the verge of getting overwhelmed by this passionate longing when... your phone suddenly lit up, indicating an incoming call. Before you could snap out of the moment you were having, Baekhyun had you flat on your back, all slick and ready for him to push inside. And that he did — in one quick and rough movement, filling you up and giving you no time to even make a sound before his hips tested you out with a couple of low amplitude thrusts. The table moved slightly, soft clanking of tableware falling on deaf ears. Meanwhile, Baekhyun grabbed onto your hips, lifting your ass in the air for more control over the penetration.
‘Baek, I swear
 You have like 2 minutes before Chan-’ A vicious thrust reached further than before, definitely getting your friend’s name out of your mind for good. And anything else for that matter.
Baekhyun snapped his hips as if he wanted to get as deep as humanly possible, as if he wanted to literally ruin you, and you could only scratch at his forearm while losing yourself in the feeling of his hips colliding with yours and the delectable sounds the action produced.
‘Baby,’ Baekhyun suddenly breathed out hoarsely, eyebrows knitted together as if in pain, ‘I can’t hold it off-’
Hearing his voice so strenuous and somehow vulnerable, you threw your head back and closed your eyes, spreading your legs further apart to allow him to better angle his powerful thrusts.
Your limbs were starting to grow numb and the veins on your neck popped when you moaned, and that’s when Baekhyun let out a strained ‘ah’, holding you in place by the hips to give you his erratic final thrusts.
In that moment you felt like something snapped inside you. Your core was tight around your lover’s cock, your body shaking in pre-orgasmic bliss, and you’d never experienced it this way. You felt so full and content in this moment when he was still moving his hips and groaning stiffly above you, riding out his high. There was nothing else he needed to do to take you along. The sensation of his warmth inside you made you pulsate, wailing so loudly that Baekhyun had to cover your mouth with his palm. He kept going for a bit to prolong your orgasm and let you slowly come back to your senses.
Your eyes stared vacantly at the kitchen ceiling and your throat was dry, although Baekhyun’s hand was still clasped over your mouth. When both of you managed to catch your breath, you just gazed at each other for a few long moments. You were so spent that you couldn’t even read the semi-blank expression on his face. He slowly slipped his palm off of your face, still hovering over your body.
‘Baekhyunie
’ You murmured, touching his cheek gently. He was usually lowkey annoyed whenever you went on to kiss the little mole on his face instead of his lips. This time, however, he only lowered his head further to let you do your thing. You pressed your lips to the tiny dot on his skin, leaning back onto the table to find his eyes with your own.
‘I love you,’ he suddenly whispered in a broken voice, then cleared his throat and started over. ‘I really want you to stay with me.’
It was
 bittersweet.
You winced, feeling him pull out, and accepted his help sitting up. Holding your boyfriend close by the shirt, you nudged his nose with yours and looked up to his sad dejected eyes.
‘I know, Bae,’ your voice sounded as uplifting as you could manage. ‘I will find a way to come see you on tour in the next couple of months, I promise.’
Baekhyun was about to say something else if not for the sudden ring of his phone that made both of you snap out of your tiny little world.
‘Dang, I bet it’s Yeol. Pick up!’ You pushed your boyfriend towards the phone and eased down from the table, grabbing the tissues to clean up quickly.
‘Yes,’ Baekhyun responded.
‘Are you two fucking?!’ Your nose scrunched up at Chanyeol’s vulgar shout.
‘Yes?’ At this you paused and smacked Baekhyun’s pec for the shameless (yet truthful) response. ‘Whoa- feisty. Chanyeol-ah, better hang up before you hear her- Ow!’ He raised an arm to defend himself from your playful hits.
‘You realize that if you do not come down in ten you’re most likely missing the flight?’ You heard Chanyeol reply after a frustrated sigh.
‘Not a problem for m-’ Baekhyun was interrupted by your yell.
‘We’re gonna be down in ten, please check the fastest routes to the airport, Yeolie!’
You ran out of the kitchen barely catching Baekhyun’s grumbling as he repeated after you.
‘Yeolie. Why the hell does she even call you that. It’s not like you- What? Shut up, you bastard!’
You smiled to yourself. At least his friends knew how and when to mess with him. If you weren’t there
 They got him. He'd be okay. And with that you were happy for now.
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A/N:This piece was my reintroduction to writing, and I’d love to hear any type of comments you have^^  Thank you guys for all the interaction and amazing responses so far, I cherish each and every one of them. You're the best <3
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thewildwaffle · 4 years ago
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Friends With Monsters - Part 1
Requested by a user on ao3. I’m putting “Part 1″ on this because I already know I’m coming back to revisit this crew in the future. ***
One would perhaps think that as the first mate, the captain might deign to give Geta the slightest hint of reasoning for their latest addition to the crew. Or at least, that’s what First Mate Geta Erenti thought.
Adding an arzhi?! To the crew?! Did the captain want everyone to die a gruesome death?! The incidents at the Oshe’al Belt weren’t so long ago that they’d been lost to memory, and the arzhi had played a major part in the brutal battle, both in space and planetside warfare. They were large and imposing, on average standing head, shoulders, and chest above even the tallest biet, human, or thrishal. They were covered in short fur, spikes, and dense muscle that tore relentlessly through ground troops, and reacted quickly with any manner of weapons or at the control of a fighter ship. There were members of this very crew that had been part of the battle. There were even more members of this very crew that had lost people they knew in that battle. And yet when Captain Stern Bauer sent her the updated ship roster, there was an arzhi on the list of new recruits. Not only that, but they were listed as a new ship medic! Geta went immediately to find the captain. He was on break in the mess hall, eating a bowl of brenntar like he hadn’t a care among the stars. “Captain Stern, sir, do you have a moment that I could speak with you?” The Captain sighed and put down his eating utensils. “I think I already know what you’re here to talk to me about and I would like to point out that the roster has already been posted and the new recruits are already en route to our coordinates. No, there is nothing I can do to change that, and even if there were, I wouldn’t.” Geta held her beak shut tightly before a few words escaped that she’d regret saying. She’d served under Captain Stern long enough to know to hear and recognize the tone of his voice. He’d made a decision and that was that. “But why?” Geta finally said once she felt she could contain herself once again. “Why would you put together the roster with
 with them on it without at least consulting me?”
“I’ve made plenty of rosters on my own before. You and I both know you would have taken issue with Arzhi Fehl’s inclusion.”
“Of course I do! And for good reasons! At least then I could have perhaps pointed out that having an arzhi aboard this ship could lead to a multitude of issues with the rest of the crew.” Captain Stern stared at her with a gray/green striped face that did not betray any emotions. “I am aware. It was not a decision I made lightly, but I have my reasons for accepting their application to the crew.” He paused to return to his meal briefly to take another bite and chew as Geta looked like she was on the verge of bursting. He’d served with her long enough to recognize the expressions she made when she was trying to hold back her rather
 lively emotions. He smiled and finished what was left of his meal. “As captain of this ship, I have full authority to reject or accept new recruits to this crew. I realize you have every right to be upset with me for breaking protocol by not involving you with this last round of recruits, and for that, I do apologize. Although,” he broke his stoic expression to smile mischievously, “one might say I could blame my upbringing on that.” Geta’s tail twitched as a mixture of amusement and annoyance broke through her formal demeanor. He always did that when she caught him bending rules like this. It was a very human thing to do, and while Captain Stern was no human, he had been raised by one. “With all due respect, you can’t keep using that as an excuse to ignore protocol, sir.” “That’s probably true, Geta,” Captain Stern began calmly gathering his things and cleaning up his eating area. “But my ‘bending of the rules’ in deciding the arzhi onto our crew by myself isn’t the only reason you’re here, is it?” Geta clenched her clawed hands so tightly, she almost cut into her calloused pads. She struggled against the swirling torrent of emotions she felt, but she knew it was becoming a losing battle. “Why an arzhi?” She kept her volume down at a reasonable level, but the anger leaked through her voice more than she’d like when talking to a superior, even one as familiar and close to her as the captain. “Why bring such a monster in among our crew?” Having gathered all the mess from his meal, Captain Stern paused and sat silently looking at her expectantly. Geta knew the look. She sighed and slowly unclenched her fists. Her shoulders, she realized were also pulled in tightly and she took a moment to release the tension she’d been holding. The captain smiled ever so slightly and gestured to an empty chair and waited for her to sit before responding. “This is not a decision I’ve made lightly. And again, I must, perhaps less jokingly this time, partially blame my upbringing. You’re aware that when humans first arrived on the galactic scene, they caused quite a stir.” After a few tiks, Geta realized he was waiting for a response. “I’ve heard the stories, yes.” Of course, she had. Everyone knew the stories. Humans, with all their terrifying strength, conquering tendencies, and devious innovations had become somewhat of a power force after making their debut to the galactic community generations ago. Captain Stern continued. “Their ferocity and curiosity scared many at first, but for all that, one of the most curious of their abilities was their capacity of pack bonding. As dangerous as their potential seemed, they wanted to make friends and they were very good at doing so. They could form bonds with anyone from any race after being in close proximity for any length of time.” Geta sat back in her chair and sighed. “Sir, if I am understanding what you’re getting at here, do you mean to say that you’re letting an arzhi aboard the ship because you were adopted by big scary humans and turned out alright?” Captain Stern smiled and stood from his seat with his meal tray. “Something like that.” With a slight nod of dismissal, he left her to stew in his words. Geta watched him leave the mess hall and continued staring long after he disappeared from sight. The captain may biologically be a rerlut, but he certainly had the human stubbornness and charm down to an art. She had to admit though, there were a lot of his strange human traits he’d picked up that made him a fantastic captain. She trusted him completely, but she’d be hard-pressed to say that she wasn’t at least a little apprehensive of this latest decision. The captain seemed to be heavily relying on making connections between the humans’ past with the arzhi. She shook her head. Perhaps she could help and be sure to assign a few of the humans on the crew to help the new recruit get acclimated. *** Captain Stern followed the sound of yelling toward the med bay. The ship’s new recruits had arrived only four solar cycles ago and there’d already been two incidents on report. He was on his way now to make sure there wasn’t a third made. Medical Officer Arzhi Fehl had been just as big and as imposing as everyone expected him to be. When he first stepped out of the shuttle he’d arrived on, everyone was sure to give him plenty of space. That lasted for the first solar cycle. The first altercation hadn’t involved any physical blows, but it would have if Geta had not been there to break it up as quickly as she did. Afterwards, his First Mate had made sure there was a rotation of human crew mates accompanying Fehl at all times. It was a good idea. The humans had stayed out of the Oshe’al Belt battles for the most part, so they held no inherent animosity to the arzhi. What’s more, the humans also held a lot of influence and respect aboard the ship. Having them associated with Fehl’s presence seemed to have an effect on both the new and veteran crew mates. The next report had been less serious, but threats had been made and duties disturbed. As he rounded the final turn to the med bay, he could make out voices. He noted that none of the angry yells were in Fehl’s deep tone. That was something at least. It took the reception room’s occupants a few tiks to notice his presence, but once they did, everyone fell silent. “What is the meaning of this?” He kept his voice low and even. It was the same voice his mother used when he would get caught getting into big trouble. He was told it was slightly terrifying, so he only used it when he really needed to. No one answered at first. He gave them a moment to realize he was expecting an answer. Finally, someone, an older ehot engineer named Irubin spoke up. “It’s not right.” Captain Stern shifted to better look at the crew mate. Irubin’s scales were weathered with age, but not so old that they had lost their rich, dark orange color. A few scales were missing here and there. Especially along his scars. Scars that the Captain knew had been inflicted on Irubin when he was a young soldier fighting planet side at Oshe’al. “Would you care to elaborate, Ehot Irubin?” The engineer looked uncomfortable. “It’s not right that he’s here,” he pointed at Fehl as if everyone didn’t already know who ‘he’ was in reference to. “He’s a monster. They’re all monsters and we shouldn’t be subjected to sharing a ship with them. He’s probably planning on killing us all once we’re not expecting it.” In the corner of his eye, Captain Stern saw one of the humans, Victoria step forward. “You can’t know that? How could you-! Why would you even-?! You don’t know him! Fehl is a sweetheart, which you’d know if you took five minutes to try to talk to him like a civilized-” Captain Stern held up a hand. Victoria, paused in mid-rant, dipped her head and stepped back again. He noted that she stood a little closer to Fehl this time as if she was moving to put herself in between the arzhi and everyone else. “I know what you’re trying to do, Captain, sir,” Irubin said with much less vitriol in his voice this time. “And what is that?” Irubin looked uncomfortable like he’d maybe wished he hadn’t said that aloud. “You
 you’ve been assigning humans to be with him so they’ll pack bond and get the rest of us to
 to just
 be okay with having him here.” Captain Stern hummed a moment and scratched his chin. “Of course I have. I figured it was the most obvious and sensible thing to do in this case. Humans are capable of forming bonds and friendships with almost anyone, but,” he paused to look over at Fehl and Victoria and then returned his gaze to Irubin, “they only do so with those they feel safe with. Humans are famously intuitive on these sorts of matters. Do you mean to tell me that you’re questioning the humans’ judgment?” Irubin’s short ears bent back. “No, of course not, I-” “And what’s more,” Captain Stern continued, “are you questioning my judgment? Do you think me an incompetent captain of this crew?” His ears went all the way back against his bent neck. “I, I would never, sir. Of course not.” “Good.” Captain Stern straightened his posture and let his shoulders casually drop. “If you and your companions would be so kind as to meet me in my office for a few mentiks. I’d like to discuss the matter here a little more in depth. Perhaps we could brainstorm some ideas together to make sure that understanding is something the rest of the ship shares.” Although he kept his voice lighthearted and level, it was clear that the invitation was in fact an order. The engineer nodded respectfully and was followed out by two other very sheepish looking crew mates. After a moment, only he, Fehl, Victoria, and a small booka sitting on a bench remained in the room. As Captain Stern finished watching the others leave, he turned to look at the fiery cat-like alien expectantly. “Uh, I, I have an appointment with medic Fehl, but if this is a bad time, I can reschedule.” Captain Stern smiled and shook his head. “That shouldn’t be necessary, Churra. I do hope you’ll allow me to delay Medic Fehl just a few more mentiks though?” With a dip of the booka’s head and a slight darkening of fur, Captain Stern returned his full attention back to Fehl. The arzhi medic stood a good head and shoulders above the captain, and a voice in the back of Stern’s mind reminded him that the fears that some on the crew had for the new crew mate were most certainly founded. Not only were arzhi large, powerful, and quick, but they seemed to exude an air of dangerous predator around them. That was, Stern realized, until you got to the eyes. While the rest of them seemed deadly, the eyes were soft and kind. And in Fehl’s case, a little apprehensive and unsure. “Captain, sir, I apologize for this whole mess, and that you had to get involved. I know you’re busy and-” “Don’t worry about me, keeping crew mates in line is part of my job,” Captain Stern waved his hand dismissively. “Another important aspect of what I do is make sure crew mates are adapting well to their new positions. Is there an empty med room available that we can talk alone for a moment?” There were plenty, and the captain and the medic took the first one they found. It was a simple check-up room. A bit small with Fehl’s bulk inside, but not so much that it was uncomfortably cramped. “I’ll keep this quick Fehl, since I know you’re busy,” Stern began. “First off, and I know I said this to you in your arrival interview, but thank you for coming here and being part of this crew.” Captain Stern noticed how Fehl shifted a bit uncomfortably and paused. He waited as the arzhi medic mentally worked to put his words together. “Sir, I
 I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but
 well I put in many applications to
 I don’t even remember how many ships. I know why I was denied so many times, but I wanted this position so badly I just kept trying. And then you
 I never expected a Coalition crew... I mean, after the war
” “The war has been over for solar cycles. There’s been peace and trade between our governments. There certainly were no rules that said I couldn’t hire you to my crew.” Captain Stern took a seat and motioned for Fehl to do the same. “That being said, I am not ignorant to the fact that my feelings on the matter are not a popular take with everyone aboard.” “So why accept me on board? My kind has a well-earned reputation of violence, even amongst ourselves. I’m sure most captains threw out my application as soon as they saw my species listed.” “Well for starters, let’s not forget you are quite a skilled medic with an impressive record. Anyone with half a brain would be foolish to ignore that,” Stern chuckled before he quieted into a thoughtful look. “I was always taught to see individuals as they were, not as stereotypes given to a lump sum. As for Ehot Irubin and the others, I’m hoping this will be a teaching experience for them. It’s high time they got over their fear.” “Their fear, sir? Fear of me, I assume?” Captain Stern gave a slight nod. “Of you, partially. Though mostly, I think it’s their fear of facing the future without the prejudices the past has given them.” Fehl thought about it a moment and nodded. “Is that why you assigned humans to help, what was the saying they used... ‘show me the ropes?’” “I put together your schedule since you got here and I know for a fact you’ve had more than just humans as chaperones while you get settled.” “No, but it’s mostly been, humans.” He looked up sharply, “Not that I mind, of course, they’ve been great and I really appreciate them! I’d heard stories about them before, but I’d never been around them before.” He lowered his head and voice slightly as if worried Victoria might hear them from the waiting room down the hall, “Are they always so nice, or is that just part of their duties?” Captain Stern laughed. It seemed to break some shell of apprehension that Fehl had been feeling as a smile broke out over his face and his eyes lit up. Stern noticed that the arzhi smiled like humans and he himself did, with exposed teeth and wide grins. It gave the captain a small swell of affirmation that his decisions to this point had been right. “Medic Fehl, I can’t speak for how all humans are, but I can assure you that the humans aboard this ship are just like that. I wasn’t kidding earlier when I said humans have a great sense of intuition. If they like you, the rest of the crew will come around in their own time and way as well.” Fehl dipped his head low. “Thank you, Captain.” “You’ll do fine, Arzhi Fehl. I’m glad you’re here and am expecting great things on this ship. Aller anfang ist schwer.” Fehl blinked in confusion. Noticing, Captain Stern sighed, “That last part didn’t translate for you did it?” “No sir.” “It means all beginnings are hard. Your translator’s database doesn’t have Earth German integrated. It’s the language I was raised with. Sometimes it fits a situation better than my own native Nort Rerlutti. You must have Earth English, Hindi, and French integrated already, otherwise you wouldn’t be able to understand the humans on the crew.” “You’re bilingual?” “I actually learned several Earth languages before I was old enough to be fitted with my first universal translator. My mother was insistent on that being part of my education.” The captain stood and smiled at the medic who was still taller even while seated. He took in the expression on the medic’s face and smiled. “Do you have any more questions, Medic Fehl? I do need to get back to my office to have a conversation with a few of your crew mates that are waiting for me.” “Captain, if I may ask
 you were raised on Earth by humans. Is
 is that why you gave me a chance? Are you hoping I can help my people lose our stigma as the humans did theirs? I’m worried
 it’s a lot to... I’m not sure if I can.” Captain Stern rested a hand on the medic’s tall shoulder reassuringly. “You worry about your duties as a medic, I’ll worry about the rest. Remember, aller anfang ist schwer.” “All beginnings are hard?” “That’s the way. Now, back to work. I believe you’ve got a booka out in the waiting room to see.”
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4haechie · 4 years ago
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balls, bouquets & broken hearts
➔ request: For the drabble game, can i request Donghyuck with Au #6, trope #6 & Prompts #14 please with fluff and angst? Thank youu very much, have a nice day~ 😊
➔ lee donghyuck x reader | fluff, slight angst (i tried my best but i’m a sucker for happy endings), exes to lovers au, hogwarts au | 1,407 words | “you’re so not making this easy for me.”
➔ warnings: some curse words here and there, a failed attempt at angst
➔ a/n: tysm for the request! hope u have a nice day as well, and enjoy
want to request? check this post out!
“so,” your friend chirps during lunch, nudging you with her elbow, “who are you taking to the yule ball this weekend?”
you shift uncomfortably beside her. you haven’t even thought about it...not since you and donghyuck broke up a month ago. “i don’t know...what about you?”
she flushes shyly, “mark asked me a couple of days ago.” she lets out a fucking giggle. she never giggles. slytherins don’t giggle–and you yourself haven’t giggled since...
“that’s awesome, y/f/n! i’m really happy for you.” you let her know.
she mumbles “thanks” and twirls a strand of her hair between her fingers when she sees mark at the gryffindor table, who gives her a wink. you roll your eyes.
“you know...” she grabs a french fry from her plate and nibbles on it, “donghyuck hasn’t asked anyone yet, either. mark told me so.”
you clench your fist, causing the napkin you’re holding to crumble under your touch. “why should i care?”
“maybe because you’re in love with–”
“shut the fuck up! and keep your voice down, or i swear i’ll give you your own personal thunderstorm.” you threaten, but both of you know very well that you don’t mean it.
even though you’re not with donghyuck anymore, and he was the one who broke up with you, your friend never misses an opportunity to bring him up. it’s no use though; you’re over him.
of course, you are. why wouldn’t you be?
your friend drops the subject after seeing your clenched fist. she jokes around a lot, but she knows you better than anyone. she knows you’re hurt because of him. but she also remembers how happy he made you. she just wants you to be happy, again. she hasn’t seen you smile since...since, well, donghyuck dumped you. she wants to make him pay, yes, but she also wants him to realise how badly he fucked up by breaking up with you.
/
“how do i look?” y/f/n asks you, spinning around slowly. her dress is beautiful–a sleeveless, emerald-coloured ball gown. its frock is done in lace, layers and layers of it. her dress might be beautiful, but she looks even more ethereal, you think. mark is a lucky guy.
“stunning,” you reply. you hand her her purse containing emergency supplies–a piece of paper with the new password to the common room, her wand, lip gloss, a pack of gum, and a copy of the map of hogwarts.
she flashes you a grin, but it soon fades away. “you’re really gonna stay here all alone? can’t you at least come for the food or something? i promise i’ll keep you company the entire time.”
you shake your head, “y/f/n, you know i can’t. what if i see him?” you trail off, fidgeting with your wand. she looks like she’s about to argue, but you point your wand at the door of your and y/f/n’s dorm room, “alohomora.” it whips open, and you get up and shove her out of the door. “have fun– and tell mark i said hi!”
/
it hasn’t even been an hour since your friend left, but you hear a knock at the door. there’s no way she’d be back so soon. you grab your wand–just in case–and carefully head to the door. with your wand in your right hand, you twist the knob with your left hand, ready for some teacher to come breathing down your neck as to why you failed to show up at the ball.
“hey, y/n.”
it’s donghyuck.
what. the. fuck.
you must’ve said that out loud, since donghyuck looks beyond apologetic.
“sorry, i didn’t mean to show up like that, um...”
“what are you...what are you doing here?” you manage to say. he replies but you don’t hear anything. your eyes trail down from his eyes to his lips, then to his hands–he’s holding a bouquet of your favourite flowers from hogsmeade?
what in merlin’s beard?
“so, yeah. i’m sorry. i’m really fucking sorry.” he finishes his long rant–which you don’t hear–and holds out the bouquet.
you don’t have words. “uh...” you take the flowers, nonetheless, but you curse yourself silently for not paying attention to what he has to say.
he giggles.
slytherins...they don’t giggle. unless they’re in–
“i asked you why you didn’t go,” he says.
“oh. um, i didn’t really want to. i was planning on catching up on homework,” you gesture at the various books and stationery spread out on your bed.
he nods. “i hope you like the flowers,” he scratches the back of his neck. “i’ll leave you to it,” he says as he’s about to walk away. then it occurs to you–how did he get to your dorm without getting caught?
“wait!” you tug at the sleeve of his long-sleeved shirt, “how did you even get here? there are teachers and prefects patrolling, right?”
he looks down at your hand and looks back at you sheepishly. “i used an invisibility potion.”
he...he brewed an invisibility potion just to see you?
“wow. i, um, did not expect that. wait, why did you even give me the flowers?” you say.
the sheepish smile leaves his lips, and gets replaced by a smirk. “you really weren’t listening to a word i said, were you? who would’ve thought? you...getting distracted because of my handsome face...”
your snap out of the confused look you’re giving him to punch him square in the arm. “you know, what? fuck you, donghyuck. here, i thought you’re being nice to me–for once, acting like i exist, ever since you,” you jerk your index finger at his chest, “broke up with me.” tears almost threaten to spill from your eyes, but you’re stronger than that. you chide them internally, sighing, and blink them away.
he quickly regrets everything, as soon as he sees the glisten in your eyes. “y/n...”
“leave. just go, get out of here. don’t make me use magic.” you throw the flowers back at him. he catches them, barely, and watches sadly as a few petals drop to the floor.
he grips them in one hand and juts out another to stop you from slamming the door in his face. you’re about to protest, but he says: “do you wanna know what else i said? i said i was sorry. i said i never meant to break up with you. losing you, letting you go, was the worst mistake i’ve ever made. i regret everything, y/n. i broke up with you because i was scared. nobody made me feel the way you did. i was scared because i was in love with you, y/n. i am still...i still love you. i’m still in love with you,” he says almost in one whole breath. “i guess i never stopped.”
you’re left speechless again. you don’t know what to do. magic isn’t going to get you out of this one.
“i totally understand if you don’t feel the same way,” he continues. “actually, there’s no way you do. i’ll get out of your hair now. just wanted to come right out and say it, so that, you know, i don’t regret not telling you.” he gently removes your hand from yours, gives you one final look of pure love, and steps away from you.
jesus, this boy.
“god, you’re so not making this easy for me.” you grab his arm, turning him to face you. “i don’t. i don’t not feel the same way. when you broke up with me, most of me was really fucking angry–and hurt and confused. but i also realised how much you meant–” you shake your head, “mean to me.”
his smile gets bigger after hearing each word you utter.
“you hurt me, donghyuck. but...but i know your feelings are real and genuine. it’s gonna take some time for me to, like, forgive you completely, though.” you eye the flowers in his hand and take them back.
his grin is brighter than anything you’ve ever seen. he holds up his hands, “i totally understand. take as long as you need.”
you give him a small smile. “so...the ball isn’t over yet. what do you say we go together–as friends, of course.”
he smiles so hard you think he’s gonna burst, “i thought you’d never ask.”
maybe...maybe you’ll forgive him sooner than you thought.
( “i forgot to ask–who told you i’d be in my room? like, how did you know i wasn’t at the ball?”
“y/f/n told me.” )
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bountyofbeads · 5 years ago
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Rudy Giuliani: ‘You Should Be Happy for Your Country That I Uncovered This’
Donald Trump’s personal attorney unleashes in a new phone call with The Atlantic while Trump allies turn on him.
#DeludedRudy
Rudy Giuliani: ‘You Should Be Happy for Your Country That I Uncovered This’
President Trump’s personal attorney unleashes in a new phone call with The Atlantic while Trump allies turn on him.
ELAINA PLOTT | Published September 26, 2019 2:25 PM ET | The Atlantic | Posted September 26, 2019 5:15 PM ET
When I last saw Rudy Giuliani for lunch, at the Trump International Hotel in Washington four weeks ago, his most pressing concern was that he had been locked out of his Instagram account. Giuliani, the former mayor of New York City and current personal attorney to President Donald Trump, had a young woman named Audra, who told me she had won the “hottiesfortrump” Reddit channel’s “Miss Deplorable” contest  three years in a row, there to assist him. As Giuliani and I spoke, roughly a dozen tourists asked him to pose for photos and congratulated him on the “work” he was doing for the country.
Today, Giuliani, and specifically his “work” on behalf of the president’s 2020 reelection campaign, is a key part of a whistle-blower complaint describing alleged efforts to solicit foreign interference in the upcoming election—perhaps the most damning scandal of the Trump presidency to date. The complaint alleges that White House officials sought to “lock down” all records of Trump’s call with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky, during which Trump offered the help of Attorney General William Barr and Giuliani to investigate the dealings of former Vice President Joe Biden’s son Hunter in the country. It also alleges that State Department officials were “deeply concerned” about Giuliani’s subsequent conversations with Ukrainian leaders.
Even among the president’s closest allies, Giuliani is now the subject of scorn. When I reached him by phone this morning, following House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff’s release of the full whistle-blower complaint at the center of the Ukraine scandal, he was, put simply, very angry.
“It is impossible that the whistle-blower is a hero and I’m not. And I will be the hero! These morons—when this is over, I will be the hero,” Giuliani told me.
“I’m not acting as a lawyer. I’m acting as someone who has devoted most of his life to straightening out government,” he continued, sounding out of breath. “Anything I did should be praised.”
Giuliani unleashed a rant about the Bidens, Hillary Clinton, the Clinton Foundation, Barack Obama, the media, and the “deep state.” He has spoken freely about all these topics since the moment he became a surrogate in Trump’s 2016 campaign. Giuliani has aired far-right conspiracy theories about Hillary Clinton’s health on national television. He has discussed his convictions about alleged Biden-family corruption with Trump in the White House residence. Still, until the Ukraine scandal broke, Trump’s allies were almost uniformly supportive of Giuliani to reporters, and current and former administration officials would often praise him for his loyalty.
Not until the back-to-back release of the summary of the Trump-Zelensky call and the full whistle-blower complaint did the mood change among this group.
This morning, a former senior White House official told me this “entire thing,” referring to the Ukraine scandal, was “Rudy putting shit in Trump’s head.” A senior House Republican aide bashed Giuliani, telling me he was a “moron.” Both individuals spoke on condition of anonymity in order to be candid.
“They’re a bunch of cowards,” Giuliani told me in response. “I didn’t do anything wrong. The president knows they’re a bunch of cowards.”
Giuliani said he’s looking forward to watching the State Department “sink themselves” as officials try to create distance from him. In the complaint, the whistle-blower wrote that officials, including Ambassadors Kurt Volker and Gordon Sondland, “had spoken with Mr. Giuliani in an attempt to ‘contain the damage’ to U.S. national security,” and that the ambassadors had tried to help the Ukrainian administration “understand and respond to the differing messages they were receiving from official U.S. channels on the one hand, and from Mr. Giuliani on the other.”
When I asked him about this specifically, Giuliani nearly began shouting into the telephone. “The State Department is concerned about my activities? I gotta believe [the whistle-blower] is totally out of the loop, or just a liar,” he said.
Giuliani went on to say that State Department officials had asked for his assistance. “If they were so concerned about my activities, why did they ask for my help? Why did they send me a bunch of friendly text messages reaching out for my help, thanking me for my help?” Giuliani said he planned to make sure these “friendly text messages” came out “in a longer story.”
He continued to stress that “all his facts” were “true” about the Bidens, though there is no evidence so far that they are. Giuliani argued the reason his attempts to root out corruption were front-page news, and not the alleged corruption itself, was because “the press idolizes Joe Biden and despises Donald Trump.” In a tweet last night, Biden said it was “clear” that “Donald Trump pressured Ukraine to manufacture a smear against a domestic political opponent,” calling it “an abuse of power that violates the oath of office and undermines our democracy.”
Giuliani has no intention, however, of slowing the smear campaign. “If this guy is a whistle-blower, then I’m a whistle-blower too,” Giuliani said. “You should be happy for your country that I uncovered this.”
Trump Is Panicking
The president has lost control of the news cycle, and doesn’t know what to do next.
David A. Graham | Published September 25, 2019 | The Atlantic | Posted September 26, 2019 5:30 PM ET |
When Donald Trump stepped to the dais at the United Nations General Assembly yesterday, he had a speech full of sharp lines: swipes at socialism, assertions of nationalism versus globalism, harsh words for Iran. Though Trump doesn’t enjoy delivering scripted remarks, he sounded listless, tired, and bored even by his own standards, struggling through the speech.
The president had a good reason to be distracted. The same morning, he had spoken on the phone with Speaker Nancy Pelosi, trying to stem a growing tide of Democratic demands for his impeachment. According to NBC’s Heidi Przybyla, Trump asked Pelosi whether there was some way they could make a deal. Pelosi said the White House had to release the whistle-blower complaint to Congress, as required by statute. “Tell your people to obey the law,” she said.
After weeks of defiance, Trump seemed to change course. Yesterday afternoon, he announced that the White House would release a transcript of his July call with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky. Later in the day, Politico’s Nancy Cook reported that the White House would release the whistle-blower complaint to Congress.
It was not enough to satisfy Pelosi. At 5 p.m. yesterday, she stepped before microphones in Washington and announced an “official impeachment inquiry,” with her support, into the president. It’s still unclear what this means materially, but it rattled Trump. At home in Trump Tower, he was stunned, believing that he’d managed to put Pelosi off in their morning conversation, according to CNN.
Chaos is a constant in the Trump administration, but this week there are signs of a far rarer impulse: panic. The indications come in Trump’s demeanor, including the listless speech; a combative, brief press availability with Zelensky at the UN this morning; and a rambling, stream-of-semi- consciousness press availability this afternoon. They also manifest in his actions, with the White House suddenly scrambling to release documents that it had spent weeks zealously defending. This is not strategic withdrawal, but a wholesale rout. Trump is probably right to be shaken. No matter how many administration officials try to spin an impeachment inquiry as somehow constituting good news for Trump, it’s not persuasive, even if the president is never impeached, much less convicted.
Though such moments are rare, this is not the first instance of panic in Trump’s political career. Each time has seemed like a moment of peril, and after each he has engineered a comeback. The first came in October 2016, after the release of the Access Hollywood tape in which Trump boasted about sexually assaulting women. Republican officials began pressuring Trump to drop out of the race, and his running mate, Mike Pence, even considered attempting to depose him, my colleague McKay Coppins reported. Trump appeared on television and apologized, showing unusual contrition. Within days, however, he’d gone back on the offensive, aided in part by WikiLeaks’ release of hacked emails from Hillary Clinton’s campaign chairman.
A second came in May 2017. Trump had impulsively fired FBI Director James Comey, apparently expecting that Democrats, who were furious over Comey’s handling of the investigation into Hillary Clinton’s email server, would back him. Instead, he set off a furious political backlash, culminating in Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s appointment. Trump was apoplectic. “Oh my God,” he said. “This is terrible. This is the end of my Presidency. I’m fucked.” But Trump weathered that, too.
Months later, he panicked again after his response to a white-supremacist march in Charlottesville, Virginia. Trump initially condemned “this egregious display of hatred, bigotry, and violence on many sides, on many sides.” Reeling from the backlash, Trump then offered a stronger statement condemning white supremacists, then flipped back, insisting there were “very fine people” marching with the white supremacists. This furor eventually calmed as well, though not without doing some permanent damage to Trump’s reputation.
There have been other moments of panic—in January 2018, around the release of Michael Wolff’s Fire and Fury, or the December 2018–January 2019 government shutdown. These were all times when control of the news cycle, consistently Trump’s most powerful political skill, has slipped from his grasp. In that regard, this moment could be even more dangerous. As I wrote yesterday, impeachment inquiries are unpredictable, protean things, prone to spinning off in unexpected directions. The president’s mastery of the news cycle is predicated in part on his control of what gets released and when, a power that seems to be slipping from his grasp at the moment.
But these past cases also demonstrate Trump’s remarkable resilience. Each crisis saps his standing a little, but he has repeatedly managed to pull himself out of a free fall in situations that would probably have toppled a less agile politician. The Ukraine crisis will be the greatest test yet of his abilities.
Trump’s Intelligence Chief Didn’t Make Anyone Happy
Joseph Maguire did not endorse the explosive allegations of an anonymous whistle-blower, but neither did he rise to the president’s defense.
Russell Berman | Published September 26, 2019 4:30 PM ET | The Atlantic | Posted September 26, 2019 5:27 PM ET
If President Donald Trump thought his handpicked choice to lead the nation’s intelligence community would unconditionally have his back before Congress, he discovered today he was sorely mistaken.
Joseph Maguire, the acting director of national intelligence, was the first in what Democrats hope will be a line of Trump administration officials to testify in an investigation now officially pointed toward impeachment. And while the intelligence chief did not come close to denouncing the president, he made no effort to flatter him, either. He spent more than three hours testifying before a House committee trying in every which way to distance himself both from the White House and the explosive whistle-blower complaint that Democrats hauled him to Capitol Hill to discuss.
“I am not partisan, and I am not political,” Maguire said at the outset, as the former Navy vice admiral practically pleaded with lawmakers not to draw him into the scandal that prompted Speaker Nancy Pelosi to drop her long-standing opposition to pursuing Trump’s impeachment.
Maguire defended his own handling of the nine-page whistle-blower complaint, which landed on his desk 10 days after he started the job in mid-August and which the House Intelligence Committee released publicly just before this morning’s hearing began. But more consequentially for the president, Maguire defended the unnamed intelligence-community official who lodged the complaint, even as he repeatedly refused to judge the credibility of the allegations that were made.
“I think the whistle-blower did the right thing,” Maguire said under questioning from Representative Adam Schiff of California, the committee’s Democratic chairman. “I think he followed the law every step of the way.” That characterization stands in stark contrast to Trump’s denunciation of the whistle-blower as “partisan” and “a political hack job.” Maguire said it was his job to “protect and defend” the whistle-blower, whose identity he said he did not know; hours later, the president said whoever gave information to the whistle-blower was “close to a spy,” and should be punished.
The complaint alleges that Trump “is using the power of his office to solicit interference from a foreign country in the 2020 U.S. election.” It relies heavily on the phone call between Trump and Ukraine’s president, Volodymyr Zelensky, in which Trump repeatedly seeks to enlist his help in investigating actions by a potential Democratic rival for the White House, former Vice President Joe Biden. At Trump’s direction, the White House released a reconstruction of the call, and Maguire acknowledged that the complaint is “in alignment” with what those notes revealed. The complaint also alleges that senior White House officials acted immediately to “lock down” records of the call.
Democrats at the hearing immediately argued that the allegations amounted to a “betrayal” by the president of his oath of office and the nation, as well as a cover-up. They saw them as bolstering their case for an impeachment investigation. But they spent most of today’s hearing pressing Maguire on why he withheld the complaint from Congress, in contravention, they argued, of a federal whistle-blower law requiring him to turn it over.
“I believe that everything in this matter is totally unprecedented,” Maguire testified in his defense. He explained that because the complaint touched on a phone call between the president and a foreign leader, he thought it was “prudent” to first seek guidance from the White House counsel and the Department of Justice’s Office of Legal Counsel as to whether the allegations would be protected by executive privilege. He also disagreed with a finding by the intelligence community’s inspector general that the complaint raised an “urgent concern,” which by law would require its prompt transmission to Congress.
Democrats harped on Maguire’s decision to go first to the White House and the Department of Justice on the grounds that there was an inherent conflict of interest given that the complaint implicated both Trump and Attorney General William Barr. Maguire said he felt he had no choice. “I am not authorized as the director of national intelligence to waive executive privilege,” he said.
Maguire denied a report in The Washington Post that he’d threatened to resign if the White House ordered him to withhold the complaint from Congress. But throughout the hearing, he did little to challenge the notion that this was a job he did not seek and, given his current predicament, did not particularly want. Maguire, 68, was running the National Counterterrorism Center when Trump asked him to serve as acting DNI after Dan Coats, a former senator from Indiana, resigned this summer. He picked him over Coats’s deputy, Sue Gordon, who left the government after Trump made clear he would not allow her to become acting director.
When Maguire was asked today whether he had discussed the whistle-blower complaint with Coats, he quickly replied: “I would not have taken the job if I did.” It was not entirely clear whether he was joking. (He added that he didn’t believe Coats or Gordon were aware of the allegations when they left the government.)
Democrats repeatedly tried to get Maguire to weigh in on the substance of the complaint and to judge the president’s actions. For the most part, he held his ground. Representative Jackie Speier of California asked if he was “shocked” by what he read in the complaint. After stammering for a moment, Maguire admitted, “When I saw that, I anticipated having to sit in front of some committee sometime to discuss it.”
Again and again, he said he did not know if the allegations were true. His only job, he contended, was to pass them along to the FBI and to Congress. “I have done my responsibility,” Maguire told Schiff. “It was not swept under the rug,” he said at another point.
The closest he came to defending Trump was when he told the committee that the president did not ask him to find out who the whistle-blower was. But he wouldn’t say more about his conversations with the president, even to admit that he and Trump had discussed the whistle-blower complaint. “My conversations with the president, because I’m the director of national intelligence, are privileged,” Maguire said. “It would destroy my relationship with the president in intelligence matters to divulge any of my conversations with the president of the United States.”
Republicans largely tried to enlist Maguire in the president’s defense, as they questioned how the notes or transcript of a call between Trump and a foreign leader wound up in the whistle-blower’s hands. One GOP member, Representative Michael Turner of Ohio, did criticize the president, saying his conversation with Zelensky was “not okay.” But he went on to dismiss the complaint as hearsay and needle Democrats for rushing to judgment.
Even if Maguire seemed to try his best to remain impartial, he could not resist a chuckle at the expense of Rudy Giuliani, the president’s lawyer who is mentioned throughout the complaint as trying to get the Ukraine government to investigate Biden and his son Hunter. Representative Mike Quigley of Illinois got Maguire to say that, yes, he is concerned about private citizens taking on the role of a quasi-ambassador without vetting or approval by the Senate. Then, when Quigley asked the intelligence director if he knew what Giuliani’s role was, Maguire laughed. “Congressman Quigley,” he replied, “my only knowledge of what Mr. Giuliani does, I have to be honest with you, I get from TV and the news media.” He added: “I’m not aware of what he does, in fact, for the president.”
Maguire also broke implicitly with Trump on the question of election interference. The president has consistently questioned or rejected the conclusion of the intelligence community that Russia interfered in the 2016 election and that its efforts continue. Maguire, however, not only endorsed that finding, he also labeled election security as the greatest national-security challenge the country faces—over the threat of a kinetic attack from North Korea, China, or another foreign foe.
He frustrated Democrats repeatedly by refusing to opine on the whistle-blower’s allegations or even to acknowledge they concerned a threat of election interference. But when Representative Denny Heck of Washington State asked Maguire whether it would be okay for any president to solicit electoral help from a foreign government, the man Trump wanted as his top intelligence officer briefly let down his guard. “It is unwarranted, it is unwelcome, it is bad for the nation,” Maguire replied, “to have outside interference from any foreign power.”
It’s that impulse Democrats hope to capitalize on during their impeachment inquiry—any feeling on the part of administration officials that they have to stick up for the country, no matter what it means for the president. If they can convince more officials to break ranks, their investigation will be that much easier.
Trump has littered the senior level of his administration with “acting” officials, a designation he has said he prefers because it gives him more “flexibility.” The implication is that they are easier to control and keep close, as Trump forces them to essentially audition for a permanent job they are fulfilling only temporarily. Maguire, however, doesn’t seem to want to play along. He may have frustrated the Democrats, but by not rising to the president’s defense, he may have frustrated his boss just as much.   
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zombiesbecrazy · 7 years ago
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Five Times With Feeling - Part 3/5
Summary: Dick has been Batman for a week and it's been nothing but terrible.
Or four times Dick and Barbara watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer together and one time they didn’t.
Written for @batfamcontentwar​‘s #halloweencontentwar. All 5 parts will be posted during the event.
ao3  Part 1, Part 2, Part 4, Part 5
Part 3 - February 2002
“
and I can’t even turn my head in the stupid cowl!”
“Uh huh.”
Barbara smiled a little as she drank her tea and that grin made Dick even more irritated than he already was. He had been Batman for a week and he had hated every second of it. The physical weight of the cape and the psychological weight of the mantle was suffocating and one of his oldest friends wasn’t helping the situation with her barely contained laughter. He knew he was complaining and he had warned her at the beginning that it was all rhetorical and didn’t want her to interrupt, but now he was frustrated that she hadn’t said anything remotely helpful.  All she did was watch as he paced back and forth in her living room. She was probably mocking him in her head.
“You could at least pretend to care.”
“Hey. I care.” Barbara waved at him to come closer and when he did she grabbed his hands and pulled him downwards onto the couch beside her.  She outstretched her arm and Dick leaned his head onto her shoulder and she wrapped him in a loose half hug.  “Sorry. I didn’t think you were being serious. I just thought that it was a rant, that’s all. I didn’t think I was being encouraged to participate. In fact, you specifically had told me not to.” She started to run her hand through his hair and he could feel his body beginning to relax even though his mind continued to race. “This isn’t about being Batman. Not really.”
“It is.  I don’t want to do it. I know I have to because Gotham needs Batman, but I’m a fraud. I’m not him.  Bruce is dead.” He takes a shaky, deep breath and he feels Barbara’s hand still at the sound. “My dad is dead.” A tear slips out of his eye, quickly followed by another one, and he know what is about to happen but can’t do anything to stop it. “Again.” His voice cracks with the last word and it was the thing that broke whatever was left of his emotional control. Barbara pulls him into a tighter hug and begins rubbing his back softly, saying nothing, as he just started sobbing and shaking with the effort; the severity of his reaction actually surprised him which just made it even worse, and he just starts crying harder. Everything that he had been pushing down and putting aside for later came to the surface and was out of his control. He had been so busy trying to hold everything together that he hadn’t really given himself the chance to grieve yet. He and Alfred had spoken at length, but it was when everything was still so new that it didn’t feel real, and now he didn’t want to unload this on Tim or Damian who were both dealing with their own issues about it. Hell, Tim probably won’t speak to him ever again and he didn’t understand Damian at all, let alone know if Damian actually cared that Bruce was gone.  
She’s right, of course. It isn’t only about being Batman.
It had only been a matter of time until he snapped.
Of course it had happened here when he wasn’t on his guard.  When he was in the Clocktower with his ex-girlfriend; the woman that he was still in love with no matter how hard he tried to move on, because despite it all, she always made him feel safe and secure. Being with her was home away from home. The home that his heart felt the safest at.
So he just wept as she held him.
He didn’t know how long his breakdown lasted, but when he finally settled down again and was able to catch his breath he found himself to be lying down on the couch with his head resting in Barbara’s lap. One of her hands was holding his, on top of his heart, the other one was running through his hair and he could hear her singing softly, but he couldn’t place the song.  It was nice. He didn’t want to move. Not now, not ever. Not out of this quiet sanctuary away from reality.
“I can’t be Batman. I’m not Bruce.” His whispered voice now sounded low and raspy and nothing like his own. God, he was tired.
“Those things don’t necessarily have to go together.” Barbara’s tone was soothing and he felt himself calming down even more at her words and touch. She seemed to know that he didn’t really want to talk about his feelings about Bruce himself and his death right now, even though probably he needed to.  He just wanted to focus on something that he could control and fix. He wouldn’t feel so overwhelmed if he could just figure something, anything, out. “You’re right. You aren’t Bruce.  Don’t try to be because you can’t be him. Just be you. In a different suit. Be Batman.”
“With a stupid cape and no peripheral vision.”
She rolled her eyes at him, knowing how much he hated fighting in a cape and how glad he had been to get rid of it the first time. “Think of it as rebranding. You’ve done that before.”
“Creating Nightwing and taking over Batman aren’t the same thing.”
“But if you were to fix Batman, what would you do? Think of Bruce as the original, but you’re the upgrade. Debugged. Rewritten code. Batman 2.0 beta rollout.”
“You’re a nerd, Oracle.”
“That’s why you pay me the big bucks.”
“We pay you?” Barbara gave a little laugh and squeezed his hand a little tighter. “I can’t just be me though. That’s Nightwing.” Dick had no idea how to move forward as Batman because every time he thought about it, he knew everyone would immediately know that it was him in the suit; little Nightwing playing dress up in big, bad Batman’s clothes. He tried to meet Barbara’s gaze, and the corner of his lips perked up a little when he saw the faraway look in her eyes.  The look that meant that her brain was moving so fast that even if she told him what she was thinking that he wouldn’t be able to follow. He knew a lot of geniuses, but she was just on a whole other level of processing.  
After a few minutes of silence, Barbara’s fingers stopped moving through his hair. “You know what would scare me if I was a criminal who came up against Batman?”
“Most things.  Bruce was menacing, with the size and the voice and the glare
 Are you planning on becoming a super villain?” He was trying to lighten the mood, but in reality, he knew that she would be a terrifying foe. She would be able to take down a small country from her laptop and disappear before they even knew there was a problem.
“That’s it though. He was predictably scary.” She finally looks back at Dick and she has a twinkle in her eye, and he knew that she had a plan. Or at least the start of a plan. “A Batman who wasn’t afraid to smile would be terrifying.”
Dick laughs, because what else can he do?  She’s being ridiculous. “What?”
“Think about it. I’m a Penguin goon and I run into Batman.  Batman looks at me, and instead of grunting at me and throwing the usual right jab to break my jaw, he just smiles. And waits. Personally, I’d be more concerned about that. Why is Batman smiling? What is he thinking about doing to me that is making him smile?” Barbara gives Dick a little half shrug, “That confusion alone would scare me at least.”
“Isn’t that a little
 Jokerish?”
“Maybe, but I think its a little Dick Grayson-y as well.”
“Thank you for comparing me to that monster.”
“Not what I meant.”  Barbara sighs and swallows, apparently trying to sort out her thoughts. “Do you like being out there? Fighting the good fight?”
“What? Of course. I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t.” Sure, some times were harder than others, but he loved what he did, could do, for the city and for its people.
“Well, the Dick Grayson that I know smiles when he’s happy or having fun. He doesn’t even notice he’s doing it all the time. It’s reflex. That shouldn’t have to stop because he’s wearing a mask with stupid horns on it. Take advantage of the fact that smiling might be a little creepy when you can’t see your whole face. I don’t quippiness is a great idea but you don’t have to lose who you are completely when you’re in the suit.”
“They’re ears, not horns.”
“Whatever.” She starts moving her hand again and he closes his eyes as her fingers move in slow circles, and hears himself humming quietly with the motion.  “Not that long ago you told me to pivot. You need to take your own advice, Bat Hunk. It’s just something small that might make stepping into those big boots a little less daunting.”
Pivot. Pivoting was less daunting that starting over. Pivoting he could handle. What she was saying was making sense and it even wasn’t that hard to do. He couldn’t be Bruce, but he could be Batman. He could act the part with some changes.  Maybe he could talk to Alfred and see if they could make the cape a bit lighter, so that he didn’t feel like it was pulling him backwards. He probably could try and do less flips in the field as well and work on his offense.
Suddenly, being Batman wasn’t such a big deal. But he had another bigger problem. A 10 year old assassin type problem.  “What am I going to do about Damian? I can’t send him back to Talia and the League.”
Barbara seems surprised by his question. “You made him Robin.”
“And I’m already questioning myself.” Dick sighs and he can feel the pressure building up again in his chest and he’s getting worked up again.  This is the thing that has been stressing him out the most. He could handle training a new Robin, but this was so much more than that. “I can’t raise a kid, Babs.  And I definitely can’t raise that kid.” So reactive, arrogant and murderous. Dick had no idea what to do with Damian.  The kid would probably kill him in his sleep after some perceived slight.
“You can and you will. You already made that choice and you can’t go back on that now.” Barbara’s voice was firm and borderline angry, and Dick had the feeling that if he hadn’t just had an emotional breakdown on her couch that she would have slapped him. He probably deserved it. She paused, and must have seen something in his face, and she softened her tone. “Alfred will help you, just like he helped Bruce when he took you in. Damian needs you, Dick. More than he’s going to let you know.” He knew this, in his mind and his heart and gut.  The situation was very different, but he knew a little bit about being a kid who had everything change on him overnight and needing someone to look after him. There was no way that he would abandon Damian or send him away. He was just scared. Dick swallowed and nodded slightly, and Barbara continued, “All of us will help; you just have to ask for it when you need it. I know you aren’t good at that, but try.”
Dick started to protest, but Barbara shut him up with a quick glare. She was right, of course. She knew that more than almost anyone. “The thing that I didn’t really notice about Bruce until I was Oracle was that for a man who was always insisting that he worked alone, he has the biggest support system of people around him out of the entire League. And those same people are there for you as well. Probably more so.”
“You hate Damian.”
“I don’t know him enough to hate him. I’ll admit I don’t like him too much so far but that doesn’t matter.” She tightened his arm that was across his chest a little bit and he could tell that she was trying to press her words into him. To make them stick even if he didn’t believe them. “You’re the heart of our weird, little family, Dick. We love you. We won’t let you drown in this.”
“I’m the one who’s going to let everyone drown.” Dick finally pulls himself upright and sits beside Barbara on the couch, staring at his hands resting in his lap. “I have a hard enough time looking after myself and I’m barely able to be a fully functioning adult on a good day. It’s like I’m always running in quicksand; I keep going until eventually I find myself completely submerged without knowing it was happening to begin with.” Dick’s mind is a blur, thinking of all the times that he’s let someone down. Failed them. Disappointed them because he just wasn’t good enough or fast enough. When someone got hurt or worse because of something he had decided or done or missed and this was all just too much. He just felt empty at this point. “I’m pretty good at screwing up my own life. I can’t be responsible for another human. Or an entire city.” He finally turns and stares into Barbara’s green eyes and thinks of all the mistakes that he’s made with her. “I couldn’t even find a way to make us work and we’re perfect.”
“You and I are many things Richard Grayson, but we are not perfect. And it took the two of us to make it not work out last time.” Barbara leans forward, places her hand on his cheek and gives Dick a soft kiss that is both too long and not long enough and makes him feel unraveled all over again. He can feel how much she cares for him in such a small move, but he knows that this conversation won’t end the way he wants it to. “I love you.” Her voice sounds sad and he can hear the ‘but’ in the air even though it goes unsaid. “You have so many balls in the air. I just can’t be one of them. You have a 10 year old to mentor and raise, a city to protect and probably a lot of Wayne Enterprises things to focus on that you aren’t even thinking about. Baby steps. Pivot and prioritize. You need to focus on what matters most and right now that isn’t us.  When you need me, I’ll help you figure out that stuff first, as your friend and as Oracle. When you have all those things sorted, we’ll talk.” She reaches up and brushes her thumb against his cheek, apparently brushing away another tear that he hadn’t realized had slipped out. “Damian, Batman, Wayne Enterprises. In that order. We’re the easy part. Save it for later.”
All he could do was nod. He still felt incredibly overwhelmed, but he did feel better about it. It was weird to feel so depressed and full of hope at the same time. His brain and heart felt full. “Can we watch some TV and just ignore the world for a little bit? I’m not ready to go home.” Tomorrow. He’d start on his new plans tomorrow. Now he just needed his mind to turn off for a while and be comfortably numb.
“Of course.”
“Buffy.”
“Even though it’s not Tuesday?” Dick nodded again.  “Sure.”
He gets up, finds what he’s looking for on her shelf and pops a random season three disk into her DVD player and then makes his way into Barbara’s kitchen to make some more tea. He leans against the counter while waiting for the water to boil. He felt better than he did before, but exhausted. He can do this, and it doesn’t have to be by himself. His family can help him. Barbara will help him.
He isn’t alone.
Tea made, Dick heads back into the living room, setting the drinks down on the coffee table and he sits back down on the couch.  He pulls Barbara close against his side and gave her a kiss on the top of her head, taking in the scent of her hair, watching the beginning of the prom episode start on the screen. A good choice - it meets his current mood of sad but optimistic. She relaxes into his embrace, and Dick can’t help but smile to himself. He can do this. They can do this. They’ll all be okay.
He gives her a small squeeze and she snuggles into him further. “You still my girl?”
“Always.”
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alaystus · 7 years ago
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In order to understand the full context of this post, please take a trip through the Wayback machine, and read this blog post from someone who at at a Jimmy John’s restaurant about seven years ago. I got overly upset and passionate about this, and may have sent him a really long, absurdly long even, perhaps even quite rude string of comments where I’d chopped up my rant into digestible pieces. I was partially amusing myself, and I was fairly certain the person wouldn’t bother to read what I had to say. It’s possible they will, but why should I care. I will now share with you the rant I’d written. Prepare yourself. Ahem. It's been seven years and our menu has changed, but I swear I'm 'boutta throw hands over this blog post over here. You think it was abandoned. You think it wasn't seen. But I see it, and boy do I have something to say about it. I'm currently an employee at a Jimmy John's franchise, and while I absolutely hate my miserable job here and it's slowly killing me to the point that I have near existential crisis daily, this blog post is still something that upsets me simply on the basis of its argument. First of all, I'm going to agree with you on one point. Jimmy John's is overpriced as FUCK. I refuse to buy food from the restaurant (even with the meager employee discount) simply on the grounds that the food is too expensive for the product produced, even when you take advantage of all the freebies (which I eat). Every time I sell a sandwich to a hungry customer, I read the price they're going to pay aloud to them and find myself appalled that they find what I'm telling them to be reasonable and that they let me take that money from them. I only ever eat from the store when I work for ten hours or more and receive a complimentary meal, or if a sandwich is made incorrectly on the line and essentially becomes waste. (We aren't supposed to eat those, but we'd throw them away otherwise. Theoretically it promotes purposely fudging sandwiches in order to take them home.) With that out of the way, I'll make my point about what's upset me so. At the time, seven years ago, when this post was made, the menu was different from what it is now; peppers are no longer listed as a side item, perhaps in part due to this incident. However, perhaps to your dismay or disbelief, Hot Peppers (cherry peppers) can still be requested to be put "on the side". In fact, they're the only "Freebie" of ours that we're allowed to put on the side. However, as you already know, hot peppers can only be put on the side of Subs or Clubs. With these two facts, it should be clear as to why Hot Peppers can only be served as a side for sandwiches that could feasibly be served with peppers added to them. If you aren't paying for a Sub or a Club, then you aren't paying for Hot Peppers.  Regardless of whether or not they're listed as Free, or as a Side, this is the logic behind when Peppers can be served with your sandwich. Did you buy a sandwich that can be served with hot peppers atop it? Fuck no, you got yourself a dry-ass slim shit meat and cheese piece because you're willing to settle for the minimum requirements of what can be defined as a "Sandwich". The best thing about your sandwich is that the person making it is -supposed- to give you the freshest bread available since you're literally only eating wheat, meat, and maybe cheese. Or maybe you added some mayo or yellow mustard like some sort of basic normie. And no, before you ask, I'm not just getting mad because this is the only thing my picky-eating roommate will order from the menu. That's absurd. I'm appalled you'd think that. And yes, I do sneak mayonnaise onto his sandwiches for him. So for you to be upset at the fact you're unable to receive hot peppers with your slim simply because it was listed (at the time) as a "Free" side when you clearly didn't purchase a sandwich that would give us a valid reason to serve you peppers is appalling. It's infuriating. I had to stop reading the blog post in order to comment aloud about it. I'd almost be more understanding if you were upset over us refusing to actually slather mayonnaise upon your slim bread, as opposed to giving you peppers. The Mayo is literally right there. It's sitting there, waiting for some bread to show up just so that it may be sensually spread atop the fluffy innards. But the reason behind both of these arguments is the same. If you aren't paying for a Sub or a Club, then you aren't paying for Hot Peppers. If you're buying a sub, you're paying us to optionally put mayonnaise on the bread. This is the business model. Is this a nice business model? No, not necessarily. It's a stingy one, it's an economic one. But the rules are there, clearly defined. They make sense. Would you like to know a secret? You can actually force the staff to put a condiment onto your slim. Can you guess what it is? That's right, it's the one condiment you won't eat. Avocado. Avocado isn't a freebie, it costs about 75 cents to add to your sandwich. And if you try to buy it over the counter, there's a good chance they'll deny you. But if you order yourself a slim online and come in to pick it up, you're perfectly free to purchase yourself a Slim plus Avocado. And there's jack shit we can do about that if you pay for it beforehand. So go ahead, if you'd like to cheat the system in order to deck out your bland sandwich, be my guest. While you're at it, try getting a Slim Unwich to cut out that whole Carb Bomb stuff you mentioned. It makes the meal go down faster, and it's almost like eating an Irony Wrap. "No veggies, except the one it's wrapped in". . . . But if you're upset about management, you might be onto something. I'm not going to talk shit about my managers; there's not much shit to talk about. The managers I work with are honestly awesome people, and I fully respect them. They do the best they can, they try to please every customer, and they take it as personal failures when they're unable to do that. But I have to admit, when it comes to the -business- side of things, this store, maybe the franchise just takes a fucking hit. A real blow to the nads. I'm not going to talk shit about my managers; there's not much shit to talk about. The managers I work with are honestly awesome people, and I fully respect them. They do the best they can, they try to please every customer, and they take it as personal failures when they're unable to do that. But I have to admit, when it comes to the -business- side of things, this store, maybe the franchise just takes a fucking hit. A real blow to the nads. You talked about having a frustrating discussion with a store manager. The managers at Jimmy John's are generally more like Shift Leads. They're kind of like regular employees who just make sure everything gets done, the paperwork is in order, the register is counted, and any issues are dealt with properly. Like yours. They aren't the boss, per-se. That's the General Manager (in most cases). As with all customer service stores, we aren't here to ruin your fucking day, buddy. We aren't the official Shit-In-Your-Cheerios squad. We're here to serve customers, and we do that to the best of our ability. When there's a policy we're following in our franchise, that's a -franchise policy-. That's not us. Like when people ask us to give them our Italian Vinigarette to go. We just can't do that, it's impossible, the logistics aren't there. We have no containers. We have no plastic utensils, no I can't give you a fork. Stop asking if we serve fries, no we do not have a soup of the day, for the last time we haven't got hot subs. Pizza? That's the wro- That's Papa John's. You are thinking of Papa John's. Peppers on the side. Of all the things to be angry about. I'd understand a "manager" coming out to tell you to get off the sidewalk. Although I doubt it was just a Manager, and I doubt it was only their decision. I would guess that had been a Store Owner decision, and trust me when I say... Actually I'm going to be careful what I say. But I -will- say that when it comes to Store Owners, it's -strictly- business and nothing but. You're more likely to catch a break with the staff so long as you're cool and reasonable. Or even slightly uncool, but just calm. We appreciate our regulars. A blog post like this almost makes me wish You'd been a customer of mine, makes me wish we still listed peppers as a "Free" side just so I could explain even a grain of this rant to you. Maybe just the relevant part, the logical connection between Subs and Clubs with Freebies, peppers being one of them, etc. In fact, honestly, if you were a regular enough, maybe we'd just give 'em to you, hell, I've made exceptions. Don't tell my boss. But hell, when we've had angry customers, I've personally paid for their meals. I've personally voided orders. I've put mayo on slims. I'm not even a manager. I'm just a guy who used to be a driver. I'm just a guy who's car broke down. I'm just a guy who's angry about people who wanted peppers with their slim seven years ago. Man, fuck your peppers. "Excellent! I can now get hot peppers with my sub!" Sub? "The next time I go in there... [a kid] says that they can't give out hot peppers with a slim.” Slim. "What I know is this: Jimmy Johns claims to have the worlds greatest sandwich." We don't. We claim to have the world's greatest Sandwiches, -plural-. And if you read that lil' paragraph at the top right hand corner of your menu that you've so carefully (selectively) read, you'd know we understand that's not true. The first bit hasn't changed, and it reads as follows: "OK, so my subs really aren't gourmet and we're not french either. My subs just taste a little better, that's all! I wanted to call it Jimmy John's Tasty Sandwiches, but my mom told me to stick with Gourmet." "What you get from Jimmy Johns is cheap shitty food," It isn't cheap, it's horribly expensive. That being said, I like the food here better than some other joints specifically because it's just full of veggies, and there's absolutely no grease. Honestly, that's one of the pros of working here, no grease. The bread's baked daily, throughout the day, the veggies are delivered from local produce spots, everything's pretty much exactly as advertised. And the bread isn't chewy like at Subway. We just don't have black olives or other nice stuff like that, which is kind of a bummer. "stuck up managers,"
Don't you fucking talk shit about my managers, I'll throw down.
"and reformed corporate businessmen that decided that giving free hot peppers isn't a good idea anymore, but are too cheap, forgetful, lazy, or oblivious to change their menus."
Yes. I'm not sure what goes on at the JJ corp over in Champagne IL, but out here it's a fucking shitshow. I'm pissed as hell every day at work, and sometimes I'm afraid it shows. The schedule is all over the place, there's absolutely no communication between "management" (the store owner) and literally the rest of the entire store. It's gotten to the point to where I'm gearing up to get the team organized on their own so that we have a better idea of what's going on, and we can -actually run the store-.
If you don't wanna eat at J^2, that's up to you. I wouldn't wanna spend four bucks on a shitty slim either. Do yourself a favor and get a Sub LBI (Leave the Bread In) with all the freebies, extra veggies. Pack that fucker up. But don't you go getting upset over peppers not being a side with a Slim, I don't care if they were listed as Free on the menu, you know damn well why that is.
"Go ahead, ask them why they advertise free peppers if they aren't allowed to give them! Until this problem is solved by Jimmy Johns, I will continue to boycott. Please join me."
This is by far the most inane reason to boycott a store. Of all the reasons that could have been chosen, you went for the Pepper Campaign. We may not advertise peppers as sides anymore, so I guess your problem's been fixed. But fuck you, we still offer it, and no I won't give you hot peppers with a slim. Maybe.
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