#i understand curating your online space and disliking or feeling a certain way. but
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genuinely how do people think its normal to talk like this
#meowing#from someone who doesnt like sharing w selfshippers: you look like a massive egotistic dickhead#i understand curating your online space and disliking or feeling a certain way. but#you are very much just making yourself look like an asshole. at least imo#like if youre so insecure that you have to make it clear that everyone else who likes the same pixel set as you is delusional or wtv#maybe there is something else going on. just saying
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I know you usually mind your own business and avoid ship wars, but out of curiosity, have you ever gotten unprovoked hate for shipping Iroh and Asami? Also, whatās your advice on staying strong about it? I feel like such a coward because I donāt want to get attacked by the mob for it. I know itās just a ship, but the idea of dealing with that negativity makes me hesitant to speak up about it. š°
First off, big hug.
Second, oh boy have I ever. I've gotten it here in my askbox and in replies to my posts, I've gotten it on fics, I've gotten it in comments about me on twitter and private discords, both ones I'm in and ones I'm not. I once had someone hate me in a comment on nearly every chapter of a fic - why did they keep reading it? Seemingly just to yell at me about the ship. It got so bad I had to report them for harassment. And that's not counting all the ambient hate out there of the "ewwww omg who the fuck would ship that?" that's not directed at me specifically. So... yes.
In terms of advice, I can recommend a few strategies that have kept me safe and sane over the years:
Aggressively curate your online experience. Block anything you don't want to see, be that tags or individuals or authors. Know that shipping Korra or Asami with anyone who isn't Korra or Asami is extremely unpopular in mainstream fandom spaces and avoid those spaces - for example, public fandom discords, tumblr communities and most of Twitter. Don't start shit or comment on bad takes. Don't reply to negative comments - delete them. Don't like, don't read. Etc. This is both to protect your own mental health but also to be a good fandom citizen. I've found that if you're generally doing all the right things and minding your own business people who go out of their way to shit on you wind up looking that much more like assholes to everyone else, which can help avoid that mob mentality you mention. I've also found that, on balance, you get back the energy you put out there. If you're a positive person who is seen as a positive person, most people will interact with you positively.
Find cool people and hang out with them. In my experience, these tend to be people who are both a) emotionally mature, and b) also ship a small or non-canon pairing. They do not have to like your ship and often won't but they'll also understand the experience of having their preferred pairing disliked by a large number of fans and so are less likely to be bullies themselves. Definitely avoid absolutists - people who believe a certain kind of ship is intrinsically superior to others (e.g. canon ships, queer ships, same-age ships, whatever) - in favor of people able to say "it's just not for me" if they don't like something. Finding spaces to interact with these people like their blogs or ask boxes, or finding small-ship-friendly private discords, are great ways to build community in fandom while shipping something out of the mainstream. These people are also great to vent to and problem-solve with when you get unprovoked hate or see a terrible take so you don't feel in it alone. If you don't know where to start, find fics on AO3 that you like and be friendly in the comments. That's how I met my first fandom friends.
Recognize that you can't argue with unprovoked hate. The first nasty comment I got on a fic I agonized for a week about what I'd done wrong and how to respond. I wrote out a very thoughtful reply asking for feedback on how I could better represent Asami's bisexuality in my writing. I got back "you're a piece of shit." I've learned since that the kind of people who say that what you ship in fandom means they should run you over with their car are not the kind of people looking for a thoughtful discussion. They are looking for the moral high ground, or for a fight, or to be seen as doing something "right" online so that they can be reassured of the black and whiteness of the universe, or whatever, but the point is that it's about them and it's about them getting a reaction out of you. Engaging isn't going to change their mind. So don't. It also prevents escalation. If someone drops a turd in your ask box and you delete it, nothing happens. Publish it with a lengthy rebuttal and that continues the conversation. Instead, treat them like you would any other bully, that is, disengage if you can, and hit them really fucking hard if you can't and then disengage. Again, don't be afraid to delete, block, or report someone if they are violating any TOS.
There's also all the standard online safely stuff like never sharing your name, address, or any personally-identifying info online. Table stakes. You don't owe anyone anything.
Anyway, good luck, and I hope to see more of you, anon. I'd love to chat with more people who like Iroh and Asami together, and I firmly believe fandom can be wonderful no matter what you ship.
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I really enjoy your posts, developing the pokemon world in a thoughtful and detailed manner! There's one thing I'd like to ask though, is there a reason why you sometimes put down some of the canon characters or attribute awful flaws to them? :/ It does feel a bit disheartening, as a fan of some of those characters haha ^^;
Honestly? Personal choice. Itās my blog at the end of the day, and I find some of the characters jarring or uninteresting, the anime especially pushes pretty OP, often loud, and unbalanced characters on viewers. It doesnāt suit my tastes, it doesnāt suit how the world works here. For that reason I choose to write differently about them. This however is my opinion, and at no point do you have to concern yourself with it, if itās not how you view something.
The beauty of the internet is that we are all entitled to a space to communicate ideas and thoughts, and so long as no laws are broken, and you arenāt unkind, people can either enjoy the content, or move on and find something they like even better, or if youāre anything like me, just make your own blog to put your own thoughts and feelings out there! Which has proven to be very enjoyable too, so I always encourage others to go about voicing their likes and dislikes in this way.
I understand people like certain characters, they enjoy different things to me, but itās also totally not my business what they believe in, nor my concern. I do my best to be polite, strategic, fair and honest, but I do not lose myself to the viewers, and will not be swayed in how I choose to run the blog. A lot of my narrative choices are based on personal wants or likes. Is that selfish? Yes entirely, a blog is just a collection of your own likes and thoughts, they are inherently self satisfying. Does that make it bad? No. Selfishness can be good in moderation, it can keep you sane and safe, and considering the tumblr blog is entirely free and regularly updated, I donāt feel the vast amounts of content created for nothing is a selfish act entirely. People often find a bit of intrigue and joy here.
Of course I mean no harm to you and those who enjoy the show, or certain characters, and encourage you to find more appropriate blogs if the ideas here upset you. Your experience online is tailored by your own choices, and the people you follow and interact with. I am here to enjoy the community just like you are, in the way I feel fits the world, and will continue to do so, because itās a blog I run, and curate. Itās very easy to forget behind the blogs face, a real human with their own like and dislikes exists, and they make content often to lean into those things they enjoy because the shows and games just donāt provide enough.
I will not apologise for creating fan content, I will however encourage you to make healthy choices, and go forward with your own ideas and plans in place! Thereās always more room for different opinions and viewpoints, and those can coexist with other peopleās opinions if you let them. Iām sure a lot of the viewers here will agree with you, and enjoy things that perhaps arenāt framed in a nice light here, I know for a fact thereās some stances of characters and certain species that donāt suit folks, especially the younger crowd, but that is the choice of the blog. Please do block or delete us from your following list if itās not suited to your tastes though, we donāt hold any hard feelings here. People gotta do what they gotta do.
#no harm done op#just a topic I get quite agitated over#once you put yourself out on the internet#people think they have power or influence over what you do#like they own your content simply because you shared it#and they can change it to suit them#fact is no one can do that#social media isnāt alwasy there to bend to everyone#sometimes itās ok to just see something you donāt like and keep scrolling#been feeling the pressure of others opinions quite a lot lately#perhaps that what got this going#but honestly itās no big deal and I do hope you find a better way to enjoy the content and dodge the bits you donāt enjoy#or just find better communities suited to your wants!#both are good#pokemon#ooc#sorry for the serious topics#bet folks wonāt like this one hah
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I've gotten a whole bunch of new followers since I started making The Untamed content about a year ago, and I think it may be a good time to introduce myself and this blog to the newcomers.
Hi! ā„
I'm glad you find this chaotic mess entertaining enough to want to stick around!
That said, if you don't feel comfortable with who I am and/or what I post, just unfollow at any time, no explanations needed.
I'm Silvy, I'm a Fandom Old, 40+, and have been involved in online fandom since the late 90ies.
I'm neurodivergent, Aspie/ADHD and some spare change. I hyperfocus on things, and love to analyze fictional characters and tropes, especially things to do with the messiness and complexities of human nature and emotion. At the moment, as should be obvious, I live in the The Untamed universe, especially the Yi City corner. (You don't get emotions much messier and more complex than that!)
I have always been fascinated by āvillainsā - the people who don't act like others do, who are different, and who hurt people, sometimes without meaning to. (Sometimes very much meaning to.)
I love redemption arcs. I've grown to realize there's a this recent phenomenon happening online where people claim certain fictional characters don't ādeserveā them. I think that's utter bullshit, and an extremely negative and destructive mindset to have. People should always have the chance to change and do better. Everyone makes mistakes. Some worse than others. But while no one ādeservesā forgiveness, unless it's freely given, everyone should have the chance to change, move on and be better.
I have always been fascinated by fiction as a medium to explore the messiness of humanity. Of how people hurt each other and heal each other and grow either way. The mess of who people end up loving, or hating, or - bittersweetly - both at once. In my opinion, that is the very purpose of fiction ā the mirror held up to explore our own humanity, without suffering any of the negative consequences of reality. Yes, that includes the really problematic stuff. Yes, all the problematic stuff. Fiction is not reality.
I have 100% understanding for people who don't want to watch or read certain things ā don't self-harm by engaging with content and creators that makes you angry and upset! I also have 0% patience with people demanding others conform to their particular standards of purity. It's everyone's responsibility to curate their own online experience. Haters will be blocked.
I'm queer (no, queer is not a slur.) Non-straight, asexual, married to another woman for 6 years now. I'd say a majority of my best friends are trans or otherwise non-cis. If youāre cis and find trans/non-binary/intersex/non-gender conforming etc people strange and frightening, by all means ā stick around! I reblog quite a lot of trans-positive content. Maybe it'll offer insights! Any TERF-rhethoric will be blocked and shut down on sight, though. This is a safe space.
I'm Swedish. Socialism works. Just saying. š
These are simple facts ā if any of the above is a dealbreaker, just click unfollow and everyone will probably be happier in the long run. :)
The less problematic stuff: I'm a professional illustrator, though currently on more or less permanent sick leave. Despite sometimes crippling social anxiety, I also ended up teaching art classes - Life Drawing and Concept Art - at the local university, and was often told I was one of their most popular and well-liked guest teachers. I'm self-taught as a writer, though I am a sponge when it comes to prose and language, so for any skills I have picked up over the years, I can only thank those whose works I have read throughout my life.
I like trying my hand at most creative crafts; painting, woodcarving, glasspainting, pewter pouring, looking to try out resins soon maybe..? I take tons upon tons of pictures. If you know me better, you have probably been exposed to my random āLook at pretty thing X I saw today!ā photo-assault. (It's a love language. ā„)
I used to study archaeology at university for years, before sidling over into a creative career as a museum-illustrator, and then onward to other projects from there. It's amazing what a 100.000+ year view on humanity will do for your sense of perspective! People are people. People have always been people. We are all one people - and diversity in culture, ethnicity and language is one of the most beautiful arts of our human race. Our differences and samenesses always to be equally celebrated. (Now if we could only get better at looking back and learn from previous civilizations' mistakes so we'd stop repeating them...)
I like cats. And betta fish. And purple roses (I used to collect purple rose cultivars, before I got too fatigued to be able to take care of my garden properly. Some still live! Rhapsody In Blue is a trooper, if you want a really hardy purple rose! They can even live in pots, if you don't have a garden.)

(See, I told you I could never resist a chance to share a photo...)
I am very, very forgetful. I got my neurodivergence diagnoses very late in life, and by then my brain was so burned out, it's permanently damaged. Fatigue, memory problems and concentration issues are things I always struggle with. If I ghost you, it's not because I'm upset or dislike you ā I either missed your message, or forgot about it, or just didnāt know what to say. I'm sorry. I'm trying my best. ā„
I believe in kindness.
I try to be kind and understanding, and meet others with patience. It's taken me a lifetime fraught with generous amounts of trauma to learn to feel strong, comfortable and mostly at peace with myself, and I have very little interest in conflict or drama.
That's about it, Silvy all summed up.
Wishing all you a happy weekend!
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diff anon but i agree bcs i had similar experience! 2019 was hell, some ppl on here even refuse to speak of charles by name when talking about him. it was so hard to find ppl who support both seb & charles. but my IRL friends don't know F1, i usually also watch with my dad but he's just a casual fan, so sticking it out here is the only option. now the atmosphere is much better, in part bcs of blogs like you! thank you for simply spreading good vibes & positive energy ⤠(& sebchal worms ofc šš³)
Ah, thank you šš„ŗ Iām happy that I can help in some small way! And yes, the worms are vital šš
Iāve heard the same thing, yeah. :/ I understand having favourites - and, equally, having people/characters you just canāt stand - but for the most part if I donāt like someone I just...donāt blog about them? Whereas I feel like some people absolutely revelĀ in their hatred and vitriol and take more pleasure in tearing down the person they dislike (and their fans) than they do talking about things they actuallyĀ enjoy.Ā
I have to say Iāve been in...worse fandoms in terms of fan behaviour, where bullying wasĀ ānormalisedā by people who felt they had the moral high ground and that their horrific behaviour was somehowĀ ājustifiedā because they were the self-appointed good guys...where influential groups/users actively encouraged witch hunts and harassment and sending threats and all of that disgusting stuff. Iāve seen far too many real peopleĀ be hurt and made to feel unsafe and uncomfortable in fandom spaces because some of the more rabid fans felt the need to defend fictional charactersĀ to the point they blurred the lines between reality and fiction, and on top of that felt absolutely no remorse. But thatās less of a compliment and I guess more of a commentary on whatās, unfortunately, seen asĀ ānormalā in certain fandoms/fan communities and...honestly itās horrifying and inexcusable.Ā
Not to mention the past year has been extremely difficult for a lot of people for a variety of reasons. Many people use fandoms as an escape or respite from their real lives, to talk about the thing they love and share or make content. So I would never want to contribute to making this a negative, unsafe space for anybody, because no one deserves that, regardless of what they ship or who they support. Thereās an actual person behind that screen, and some people should really think twice before typing something that could potentially have massive consequences.Ā
But also...I think everyoneās entitled to curating their own online experience by utilising the tools that are there for that purpose. If thereās content out there thatās upsetting to you, or that youāre just tired of seeing, there are ways of filtering tags, either through Tumblrās built-in feature or third party extensions like XKit. If someoneās behaviour is upsetting to you, thereās always the block feature. Itās not personal, and it doesnāt make you a bad person or anything. Those tools are there for a reason. Just because itās online doesnāt mean itās not real or that it canāt hurt, or that your trauma is somehow less valid. Take care of yourself, always š
#replies#anonymous#sebchal anon#sebchal asks#always spreading good vibes and positive energy to the best of my ability <3#real life is damn hard and often upsetting and fandom spaces should be a safe space to escape from that#sure there will always be disagreements but straight up bullying and harassment and making people feel unsafe and uncomfortable is never ok#long post
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