#i try to interact with my moots whenever i have the time (that i dont have). yeah! sure but i dont believe anyone

[almostyours]

hiiiiiii. i would like to take a moment to address what’s been going on.

i’ve been aware of some content creators copying me because of anons constantly name-dropping them in my ask box. as some of you may know, i’ve always believed that if someone has something important to say and isn’t just trying to stir things up, they will be voicing it openly rather than hiding behind anon. that’s why i’ve been avoiding posting name-dropping anons as i didn’t want anyone to be affected by them unnecessarily.

when it comes to the accusations of some content creators copying me, i’ll be honest, i didn’t give them much thought because i didn’t see a super big resemblance between their work and mine, and even if i did, i didn’t care enough to make it a big deal. 

obviously, that was my first mistake. i kept getting anons for a while and i usually just deleted them. but i’ll admit, they brought my attention to some content creators—two specifically. i will be lying if i said that i didn’t raise an eyebrow when groups started becoming lore-heavy after interacting with my content and mentioning me or my group every now and then. or when suddenly everyone was part of wicked after i’d mentioned that one of my ocs was going to be in it months ago. but at the end of the day, i don’t own lore-heavy concepts, and i definitely don’t own wicked, so why would i make a fuss about that? i imagined that they were just inspired by my group’s concept or had just watched the film, so i just kept it going without doing or saying anything.

my second mistake was allowing people to talk for me, and not addressing this sooner. 

i am not the one sending anons, and i don’t know who is sending them. i don’t know who keeps mentioning me and my group in other people’s ask box, and i don’t know why they are doing it for the sake of someone who doesn’t really care. because as long as no one is straight up stealing my lore, my ideas, copying my graphics, and using layouts or formats i’ve came up with without credit, i genuinely don’t care. 

and i have no idea why someone is doing all that. because from what i can tell, i’m not even the one who’s most offended here, so i see no reason for anyone to bring me up in anybody’s ask box. i also don’t appreciate the implication that those anons are my responsibility or that the people who interact with me are somehow behind them. as far as i know, i’ve never done or said anything about the matter to have fingers pointed at me. if anything, i’ve avoided fueling this because it’s just not worth it for me nor anyone involved. 

with this said, if someone is really sending anons on my behalf, don’t do that. i don’t want or need that kind of energy attached to my content.

trust me, i don't care that much to have anons camping in other people's ask boxes.

[screampied]

HIIIIIIIIIII, omg so cute that u missed me cause i missed you too ☹️☹️

OMG TOJI IS THE BIGGEST CONDOM HATER AND HE HATES TO PULL OUT, MF IS MAKING KIDS LEFT AND RIGHT (the money i would pay to be one of his baby mommas is as large as his cock).

nanami starts so sweet, he is the type to say some stuff that makes your dizzy mind go “he didn’t”. i can see him always being respectful saying “you feel so good, baby” and then he finds out that whenever he swears his partner likes it, so he starts taking his chance, and a few weeks later he sweetly calls her his pretty slut. ITS ME, IM HER!!!!

i— vegas i am the biggest suguru simp ever, i would be a member of his cult, i swear to you i could worship him better than others, my mouth would make him forget i am just a dumb human. HE ALSO HAS THE VIBE OF MOCKING YOU WHILE SMILING WITH HIS EYES CLOSED LIKE OMG

so, uh, i have a humiliation kink or something…

i don’t think peach ice tea tastes like peach, but it’s sweet and good, and it makes me very happy to drink it. however, i have no control over it, so others need to pour for me and tell me to stop, because i will keep going until it all comes back up (it happened)

toe rings are perfect for me, who is always wearing sandals, so it gives that lil fancy look instead of just casual. OMG BRACELETS ARE EVERYTHING, i used to keep eyeing them on pinterest all the time and i got a silver one for my 20 birthday, i love to talk and hit it on the table, is so soothing.

btw, there’s a famous character from a tv show from my country that she is know for her many bracelets, and she was very feisty and expressive so they crinkled a lot, is really nice to be wearing it and people go “are you [character]?” DAMN RIGHT I AM.

WAIT HOLLUP YOU SHIFTED?? THATS LIKE SO COOL, me and my anxious mind could never

answering your question, on october first i’ll show myself after i finish my halloween theme and we still will interact because i love to send ask, except they won’t be anon but it will be our secret that i was nut anon. and yes, let’s be moots!!! this whole thing started because high me told ya i would bust a nut if we became moots.

i also said if you followed me before halloween i would show myself, which reminds me, you followed me on your second account, does that count? its been like two or three weeks and i kept quiet 🙂 cause i got scared 🙂

anyways question for today is house or apartment? barbie or bratz?

nut anon.

NUUUUTTYYYY 🧘‍♀️

YEAAAJHH ☝🏽☝🏽. he’s so annoying, he’s literally the guy who’s like “no condoms fit me,” and just loves going in raw. ur reaaaal i'd love to be his baby mama, that's my man. to me toji isn’t a deadbeat he’s a living / caring father & husband !

nanami 😕😕😕. i want him so bad he’s so husband. i rmbr having such a huge nanami brain rot out of nowhereeee and i would write ab him nonstop. i always think ab virgin!nanami n how he can never last once he goes inside pussy for the first time ARUGHHHH. nanami and degradation yummmmm …. twin with the humiliation kink 🧘‍♀️ that'll be in my cult leader geto fic

YESSSSSS i shift sometimes 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️. it's funnn but a lot of ppl think it's fake, i think it all dependssss. you should try it it’s so cool, especially if you’re a deep sleeper bc it kills time me thinkssss

ooooh okay !!! YAAAAAY NEW MOOTS. ofc it’ll be our secret 🫂🫂. help i followed u on my second account rly ….. bye i still have no clue who you could be tho omg. IM CURIOUUSSSS. have i sent you an ask before eerrrm. DONT BE SCAREDDD.

hmmmm house and bratz !!!! 🧘‍♀️

[yuyusuyu]

omg hi i just stalked your entire profile, i love your writing so much!! and i look forward to seeing your future works as well~ i've noticed you interact with a lot of people, so i wanted to ask if you could maybe ship your moots with an atz and what their trope would be :>

hello anon ! thank you so much for enjoying what i write, it means a lot to me~~ <333 and hehehe, sure ! i thought about this a lot and decided to do it with the people i feel like i've talked to enough to get a feel of their personality !! also i am sosososo sorry that i took so long in answering !! uni is terrible and i just redid this multiple times because my lovely moots deserve the most detailed description of whatever i conjure up for them and who i ship them with 👿🤞🏼🙌🏼

@ad0rechuu and yunho — opposites attract ! zerooo is such a lovely person!! she's so supportive and she honestly reminds me of home! she reminds me of when i would wrap myself up in a blanket during winter tbhh hehehhehe since i've noticed zero is pretty calming and chill (but you have a goofy side as well! im always laughing whenever you send your memes HAHZHAJSJ). and yunho is such a goofball, not like absolutely crazy energetic/chaotic. but the two of you have differing personalities (but not like 100% different!) that would compliment each other so well like puzzle pieces!! (ZERO MY WIFEEEE ILYSM MWAH MWAH MWAH 😓🫶🏼)

@sanhwaism and seonghwa — childhood friends to lovers ! MY CUTIE PATOOTIE DEAREST AND LOVELIEST RIA 😓 i love ria smsmsmsmsm !! ria is such a sweet and lovely and caring person ughhh she is someone that you would want to protect and keep in your pocket at all times !! from the the times we've spoken, i felt like i had known her for a long time and that's why childhood friends to lovers trope would fit her and seonghwa ! seonghwa and ria would have those inside jokes that would make people go all like ?! what are they talking about ?! after seeing them start laughing,, and they'd be the type to suddenly appear at each other's door at one in the morning with takeout and be all like, "hey! i got us some breakfast!" so goofy and cute 😭

@jaehunnyy and san — academic rivals to lovers ! CHIPPIE MY LOVE MY EVERYTHING 🤍 you and san give academic rivals to lovers ! i feel like you and san would have a healthy dynamic though, like you guys would try to one up the other, tease each other and whatnot ! you guys wouldn't hate each other, but you aren't exactly friends either~~~ until many study dates/hang outs later san confesses to you while you're about to fall asleep in the library (it happened, your honor. i saw it WITH MY OWN EYES) !! anyways. you and san give healthy academic rivals to lovers vibes and i approve of it. youre so cute and funny and cheerful, and san would just look at you with heart eyes whenever you talk. HEART EYES. CUTE CUTE CUTE 🤞🏼🫶🏼

@dairyminki and san — next door neighbors ! ELLE, THE APPLE OF MY EYE, HIII (i miss you sosososo much; i hope you're doing well my dear) !! you and san would be next neighbors for foreverrr ! to the point where each other's parents would make you walk next door to give them food that your family that day 😭 and you and san would be like polite to each other, walk to and from school each other (it's an unspoken agreement!), just super like... unofficial friends IJFIA and honestly it just naturally turns into more from just being neighbors to friends, friends to best friends and then best friends to lovers! all giggles and shy glances at each other, holding hands and talking and literally spending your time with each other because hello you guys are literally living next to each other

@seonghwaddict and yunho — second chance romance ! LILOOOO MY BAEEEE 🫶🏼🫶🏼 you and yunho are very second chance romance as in you two had a very nice relationship during high school but broke up because the two of you got into two different unis NAURR 💔 BUT DONT WORRY ! years later you visit your hometown and bump into yunho ?! and you keep bumping into him ?! it's like the universe wants you back together ?! and maybe you two never dated anyone after each other because you two still have feelings for one another ?! and then one day you find yunho at your parents' doorstep ?! and he's professing he's undying love to you ?! and then it's like you two never broke up in the first place

HELP ME I REALLY WROTE WHOLE ASS SCENARIOS FOR THIS 😭 the way i've had this in my drafts since august... AUGUST.... goodbye.

[kaiserkisser]

mutuals appreciation post <333

hello, everyone. this is my end of year mutuals appreciation post to thank each and every one of you here, who has put up with me enough to be friends with me. I simply can't put it into words how much I love yall and how much im grateful to all of you for being here, but I'll still try. I wish all of you a very very happy new year ❤

@delusina kaz, thank you. thank u sm for everything. you were my first mutual and i love you sm for that. almost all the friends i have right now, they're thanks to you. i still remember sending you cat pics every week in the beginning (im sorry i forgot to continue that 😭) and you and vi are the reason ✿❀ anon exists <3 ilysmm <333

@floraldresvi VIVI. ILYSM. ik ive already sent you a new year ask but still i can never express my appreciation for you enough <3 thank you sm vi for literally always being there for me, and i hope i can return the favor whenever you need :) i lovelovelove seeing you in my notifs :)) also baivi rules <333

@chosokisser mai my bbg my love /p again, ive already mesaaged you, but still, im so glad i have you in my life. if you need absolutely anything, if you just wanna talk to smn, or anything, ill always be here. in fact, we can even commit arson together if you want :DD and remember that me and choso adore you to heaven and back <333

@haithamvoid again, thank you sm for being friends with me. <33 im literally so glad for the day i opened tumblr to find mai forcing us to socialize XD we seem to have a bunch of shared interests and i remember the times we sent each other a bunch of kaiser (and gojo??) pics ehehe (also if you play genshin then on which server-)

@damyoujackson uhm thank u sm for being my irl bestie. I mean it. honestly i dont think ive actually had a friend i clicked with as much as i did with you in a long time. ik its probably not easy putting up with someone weird like me so erm tysm.. in all seriousness im really glad we're friends <33 ( we do NOT talk abt this in school OKAY.) (<- me being awkward)

@noomon you are an absolutely amazing, warm and pleasant person to be around! (And i love your aesthetic too omg) anyways you're very caring and nice and i always perk up whenever i see you in my notifs or inbox <33

@mikacynth mikaaa its been agesss i hope you're doing alright and uni is treating you well </3 again, one of my first mutuals that i interacted with bc you were a 'mutual in law' of mine hehe :) you're also an awesome and fun person to be around, so remember that me and kaeya love u <333

@yinyinggie yingg! You're such a big blog, so thank you sm for interacting with me! you're totally wonderful, and im so glad i got to participate in the ebg hosted by you hehe that was SO much fun <333(and it hurt my heart too but nvm-) anyways ilysmm <33

@alexisomnias aaah alexisss we dont interact much these days but still, i love you so so much, you are someone i always love seeing on my dash or in my notifs <3 and i adore alekav too its so cutee <333

@kitorin omg yes soutaa you're another person who shows up on my dash often and i love that you do <3 i hope you dont mind all the times ive tagged you in smth ahshshdhb i also always smile whenever i see u in my notifs so thank u smm for being moots with me <33

also to @ilyuu @m1shapanda @supernova25 @chooodles @camvrin @meidnightrain we havent interacted much this year, but ive loved seeing you guys often on my dash so i hope we interact more this next year <333 please dont mind me tagging you dhshsh

Happy New Year to all of you!!!! I hope you all have all the joys of the world and that all your wishes get fulfilled, because you guys totally deserve it 💕

I found a little something too here that i wanted to share with all of you since i thought you guys might like it <333

[justalittlethought]

Intro!!

✨✨✨✨✨✨

HEYO! Im not sure how I can do this but I'll try to!

(last time I made an intro was during my amino days 😭)

well for starters I'm going to say abit about myself, I am a minor turning 15 in October, I go by he/they pronouns preference for they/them and my favorite animal is a raccoon and favorite color is green! I have ADHD and autism and I don't understand much stuff sometimes so sorry if I as alot of questions! I'm a very loud person but very shy and quiet when I talk to someone I don't ussaully talk to (think about a living tamaki amajiki) I draw and I do photography, I'm a theatre and band kid and chorus kid too! This will probably be changed and updated whenever I'm on the app and I had a crappy posting schedule 😞 but its ok I swear I'l fix it,

~~Fandoms

My fandoms do change alot so it might not be updated as fast (apologies in advance);

-creepypasta

-slenderverse

-marble hornets

-anime

-MHA

-Haikyuu

-love chunibyo and other delusions!

-my dress up darling

-jjk

-erased

-Ect. Ect. (There's too much and I'm too lazy to type them all out)

-TADC

-sanders sides (The reason I downloaded tumblr)

-sally face

There is more but I forgot 😞🔫

-----------------------------------------

DM'S!

I will allow anyone to become moots/friends, I have discord so if you want me to give you that you can private message me, I do have rules for who can message me tho. If you are above 18 or under 12 please don't message me. same thing goes for if you want to date me or anything. Other than that go ahead and dm me!

-----------------------------------------

DNI/INT

DONT INTERACT

-homophobic/transphobic

-racist

-ALM

-zionist/pro isreal (I'm Palestinian buddy)

-zoofiles

-maps

-proshipers

-18 and above

-12 and below

-abelestist

INTERACT

-same fandoms!

-furrys

-therians

-kemonomimi (please I love y'all sm and I'm one myself it's just I literally cannot dress the way I want to bc of my parents 😞🙏)

-14-15

-----------------------------------------

Extra!

I'm a Wattpad author and I have 2 books in the making, one is a shigadabi story that is an alternative ending to the one we got, it takes place after the liberation front attack. And another one which is a haikyuu oneshots.

USER: brendoggxxX

Discord...I'm not gonna give that away yet but I will when I'm ready! :P

USER: N/A

Tik tok I'm a editing account that posts anything but I didn't get started on anything yet

USER: brendogxx

I also have a spam account called justalittlespam

-----------------------------------------

Alright, that's all for now. I'll probably add on later but for now that's all. Thank you for reading and I hope I can make some friends bye gang!

[makki0s]

ABOUT ME ;

୨୧ my name is lele !

୨୧ sagittarius sun ; gemini rising ; capricorn moon

୨୧ im 20 !

୨୧ she/they

୨୧ dont ever hesitate to shoot me an ask ! or a msg ! i love talking to ppl

୨୧ i love my moots even if we don't rlly talk i love you <3

BYF ; DNI ;

୨୧ DNI if you are a minor, pro-police, pro-military, pro-zionist, TERF, homophobic/transphobic, etc. I am here to write about fictional men and make friends pls leave me alone...

୨୧ if you have a problem with me either be civilized about it or don't even tell me. I am not arguing with anyone...

SIDEBLOGS ;

♡ @777heavengirl is my writing account for all things harry potter (for now) ! I post something every Friday or at least once a week!

♡ @tkuro0 is my writing account for all things haikyuu (for now) or other anime ! I also try to post at least weekly !

♡ @spacesong-mp3 is my aesthetic collection, anything to do with layouts, aesthetics; everything like that is there! its my bible

MY TAG GUIDE ;

disclaimer ! i will not be offended if you block any of these ! feel free to we all have the right to curate and block stuff for our dash !

#lele yaps! ; me yapping and rambling

#lele does tag games ! ; self explanatory i fear

#leles writing prompts ! ; prompts i find around tumblr that i like and might use later!

#leles reading recs ! ; stuff i lived and wanna show some love for !! also a way for me to be able to keep them like my own little diary i can go back and reread

#leles read later ! ; stuff i havent had time to read yet

#moots ! 🫧 ; my moot tag! whenever i get an ask or interact w one of my lovely moots <3

[willowedwisteria]

oh lord im so fecking sorry for my friend that pulled an essay on you- i didnt know they would add some stuff about the past events until i found out today.

but ig its time ill tell the truth, and its a stupid one honestly. im currently under the weather and starving so i might write a bit shorter than usual.

so, uh. the reason why i was avoiding yall back then, was because- uh-

i felt like i was the last resort, you know, the third, fourth, fifth wheeler in a friend group. this wasnt the first i’ve experienced it. i know i speak a lot and tend to interrupt (truly sorry for that), and sometimes i was told to talk less or just be quiet.

i was also told that i always interrupt every conversation when a common interest was mentioned irl.

i already mentioned it in my blog but im going to say it again, i honestly felt like i have to please everyone on the discord server, that i have to play my cards right to please the many interests of everyone there.

dont get me wrong, i love feeding all of you fics about your fav(maybe slander them in the process too), but over time it felt like i was working hard just for recognition that “hey, im here. i still exist.”

again, this wasnt the first time i’ve experienced this. heck, i wrote like 2-3 fics just for gaile (one of them is diluc), like i was tryna impress for whatever reason. and honestly? i regret feeding gaile now. i dont hate gaile, i just regret writing fics for them.

and yes, im sensitive, i tend to get jealous of petty things, ill admit that. but i try to reason myself that “your moots have lives outside of tumblr, Hana. Of course they won’t notice your work/message/etc.”

honestly sound like im guilt tripping but im genuinely not.

i hated that i have to please people even on the internet, as if i was born to make everyone around me happy, forever making me an afterthought.

like that time where i send out a message that it was also my birthday but was met with silence, so i quickly deleted it out of embarrassment. (gunter and i shared the same birthday, surprisingly.)

and yes, i regret send that ask to you. i really do. sagau villain au has gotten way too stale here, another major reason why i regretted that. and yes it was supposed to be what my friend previously said, but i didnt expect it to blow up and it to become your au.

i often get attacked whenever i mentioned that i was the reason it blew up, but thats selfish of me, i shouldve kept my mouth shut. ahh yes, the good times where my tumblr blogs were too dangerous for me and my former followers. hah

ah flip, i got sidetracked haha. im not seeking for forgiveness, nor am i asking to interact with my former moots again. i came here to tell the truth.

a petty, childish truth.

but we all have flaws no matter how well we hide it.

im under the weather, family and childhood has messed me up, and honestly i feel like ending it all sometimes one way or another.

however, if you do want to interact with me again, feel free to tag me, even if i dont respond much. i wont respond at all if its in pms, im too awkward for that. you can decide whether you want to publish this ask or not, i dont mind.

-Hana

I have no right to say that I can truly understand how you feel since I didn't go through what you had to painfully experience, but I can say that I relate to it.

But, let's not talk about me right now.

You don't have to apologize, it was partially my fault. Your friend must have brought it up to me because I needed to at least know.

If avoiding us was your last resort, then I and I hope the rest of your old mutuals respect your decision. Tumblr may not have a place for you, but you definitely will always have a special seat in my blog.

You've been so strong after facing so much unnecessary hate. If you've experienced such hurtful comments about you supposedly interrupting someone else, unintentionally or not, I can kind of see why this was your last resort.

Recognition, fame, to not be forgotten. I don't know how to console or help you, but I'm glad you decided to take the time off of Tumblr. This is an unhealthy mindset.

If you look back into my blog, I also felt jealous of things such as notes and stuff. I felt insecure because my fics weren't doing well and I thought my writing had become terrible. I was insecure. I think you went through something similar.

You don't have to call yourself sensitive because many people also surprisingly feel this way as well. It's a valid and plausible thing, but it's also very unhealthy. Tumblr was just supposed to be this place to interact and have fun, and take a break from life.

I really wish I got to know more about you and bond with you. You seem like a wonderful person. However, for now, I don't think you'd need that.

Again, I'm so sorry for the trouble. That one mistake of mine escalated so much. We might not know each other that well, and nor do your old mutuals, but I'm sure many did miss you.

Thank you for your time here and for being here.

Thank you for the truth, Hana.

[seokmatthewz]

hello!!! it is ur resident woojong-loving fool, irida!! 💕💕 2020 was a shitty year but thank you for following me throughout it!! i am very annoying and bad at talking to people but i hope tht someday i can befriend as many of the wonderful people below as i can (if i haven’t already!!) below the cut are my wonderful mutuals (+some people who i don’t know if we are mutuals but ily!) thank you so much for all your wonderful content, and i hope 2021 is great to you!! mwah!!!

beloved moots if there’s a ‘☆’ beside your name there’s a lil note for you at the end!! but thanks again to all of you for making 2020 a little bit better!!

# - g

@99yh ☆, @absix ☆, @aka-ika, @alltoateez, @angelhyunjin, @ateezartblog, @ateezgf, @atinyz, @baejoonyoung ☆, @berryjaellie ☆, @choi-san, @choisanii, @choisans, @city127, @creker, @dreamboydongmyeong, @dumbbelle, @glossiers, @gncds, @go-saeng ☆

h - k

@haknew, @halahala, @hanbinist ☆, @hanbotaged, @heartsbang ☆, @himeaegyo ☆, @hongjoonim, @hongjooong ☆, @honjoong, @hoyoungy, @hueningkais, @hwisgf, @hwiyyoung, @hyunsung, @jaemtens, @jinlix, @johnni, @johntography, @jongupseyeliner, @junhee, @jwy, @kdongyoung, @konjoong, @kqtiny

l - r

@ladymaysworld, @leeseungjuns, @lilacwoo, @lkeonhee, @lovehui ☆, @mnkyeung, @nkamotoyuta, @oceanofaurora, @ongnielkangs, @park-seonghwa ☆, @prettyseonghwa ☆, @punksand ☆, @re-ika, @renjvn, @rotigf ☆

s - z

@san-hwa, @sanshine-on-a-cloudy-day, @seongshwa, @seonqhvva, @seungyoune, @shuhuas, @songmingki, @songmingkis, @sonqmingi, @subaek, @taeks, @taenho, @toaction, @ultchris, @wabisaba, @woo-san ☆, @wriggleygutz ☆, @wuuyoung, @xiaocity ☆, @yejiis, @yooyongha ☆, @youngjo, @yunhc, @yunhohs, @zangse, @zero-fever, @zhxngcl

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

nini - missus nini my sweet fairy pal!!! it was nice chatting with u a bit more this year!! we continue to b bad at msging each other KLFDKL but it is always nice when we do nd it was nice to complain to u nd bicker a bit!!! hopefully 2020 gets us the cute fairy/nymph/witch gfs we deserve!! lysm madam !!

han - han!!! my favourite clown ever ik i say this lots but i rlly cannot believe it’s only been a few months since we became friends bc i talk to u constantly KJFLDSJK it’s been so much fun talking to u and getting to kno u this past year!! our convos are always so entertaining and funny whether it is clowning u abt ur taste or us mutually bonding over ppl we don’t really like or me trying to get u to stan a group i always love to chat with you!! excited to watch more iconic dramas like mr. heart with u in the new year i love you!!!

alice - alice madam!! one of my most talented moots ever u r so cool nd all ur sets nd gfx are so gorgeous!! its so fun to interact with u from time to time (be it to clown u or get clowned), love u lots ma’am and i hope 2021 is fantastic for u!!

millie - MISSUS MILLIE!! my beloved pal nd wonderful hypewoman u are so cute and wonderful and iconic and it always makes me happy to read your tags and send you asks!! you are so funny and sweet and great and i’m so happy we r pals!! hope we can chat even more in the new year i love you the most!!! mwah!

kashi - kashi we have been moots for only a little while but i had 2 include u bc it was such a good time sending u asks for the stay secret santa!! u are so talented and sweet and i hope i can get to kno u more in the new year, esp since we seem to have so many fandoms in common!! u have impeccable taste mwah!! luv u!!

tori - tori u haven’t been on tumblr as much recently nd i miss u!!! hope tht u come back occasionally when ur a bit less busy bc ur always a nice nd funny presence on my dash!! love u the most i hope ur rats nd ur chickens are doing well as well as ur other pets!! mwah!!

karen - my beloved funky canadian pal!!! i am GOING TO MESSAGE YOU SOON I SWEAR I AM JUST SO BAD AT IT FJDKLKL missus karen we have been thru lots together and i trust you a lot and i’m really happy to have a friend like you who i can just say shit to without judgement!! you really are such a kind and wonderful presence even when we don’t interact for a while!! you sweet funky gal i love you!! i hope we can meet up again sometime when things are safer!! mwah!! happy new year!!

bia - wifey!!! my sweet beloved fellow jongho enthusiast i hope u are doing super well always even when we dont msg as much!!! seein u on my dash is always a good time and i am always wishing u well!! i hope we can talk more in the new year ily sosososoooo much!!! (also r u watching hyunjun’s drama JFKDSK i saw u talking abt it nd if u are we shld chat bc i am watching it too mwah!!)

lyna - LYNA MY OLDEST MOOT!! i love u sm nd i luv tht we still follow each other even tho we aren’t really in the same fandoms anymore!! u are always so kind and sweet whenever we interact and i always hope you are doing well and staying healthy!! i love u!!!

natali - nat!!! we haven’t interacted too much but we bonded a bit more this year and that is progress!!! ilusm madam all of ur sets are so pretty and wonderful and u are such a nice presence on my dash i hope we can talk more sometime soon!! mwah love u!!

yaz - yaz ik u dont use tumblr anymore but it feels wrong to make one of these and not include you in it FJKLDSKSL you know i love u more than anyone ur my beloved sweet wonderful platonic soulmate and i am always wishing you well i love you the most ever and i hope we are friends forever and always!! mwah mwah mwah!!

wren - king thank u for following me for yet another year when all we do is put random men on each other’s dashes DSKJKLD hope ur staying safe and hydrated and that u are doing well ilu !!! mwah !!!

sim - SIM MADAM MY BELOVED ANGEL PAL!! we don’t talk as much but i can’t pass ur url and not write u a lil note!! whenever we talk it’s always so fun FSDKLJSJDK even tho we are not in the same fandoms anymore i love u lots and ur presence on my dash is so pleasant and sweet!! hope we can talk more in the new year and even if we dont i hope ur new year is fantastic!!

vivi - vivi!!!!! it was so fun to chat with u a bit throughout this year and send u anons!!! u are such a pleasant and lively presence on my dash and ur gifs are so wonderful and pretty i hope we can chat more in the new year mwah!!

kurtis - bro so sorry u r still following me in the year of 2020 heading into the year of 2021 JKLFDSKL thank u for putting up with all the random kpop boys i put on ur dash i absolutely love u nd i hope ur always doing well and staying healthy!!!

siya - madam!!!! ilu!! ik we haven’t chatted much but i wanna talk to u more!!!! u seem so neat nd funky and ur always so funny when i see u chatting nd interacting w ur other moots!! hope we can become good friends and clown together some more ilu!!!

damian - my beloved fellow playm boys (or like. whatever they are now KJFDLK) stan!! we do not interact all that much but i am always hoping tht ur doing well and i hope we can interact more in the new year!!! all of our boys debut 2020 pls!!!

[unlocktxt]

hi 😄 i saw your reblog and i want to ask the same thing: what was your first impression of your moots?

First i want to say that I may of gotten a littleeeee carried away. I wanted to include as many people as possible, but some I don’t have enough to say. Despite this I might add more. I’ve met so many various people on this app and I’ve loved interacting with them all or just seeing them around. So much so that I can’t list everybody. I really love all my moots and there are so many of them that I’ll forever be grateful for. (yes i added a keep reading because this was so long and please excuse my gramtical errors)

@hoes4hoseok - our first impression was playing among us WHICH WAS SO FUN. I don’t remember much about talking to her in the game BUT I do remember that she was the first one to ever make the group chat filled with those who played with us. honestly I’m so grateful that she did that because I wouldn’t have been able to become friends with her and many others. I remember thinking that she was beyond kind and that she was good with trying to include everyone. After that I just remember hearing her voice and then DYING because she has a wonderful voice. I felt as though I related to you just a bit. Now I’ve gotten to see different aspects of her and really value her as a person and friend. She keeps things real and is so helpful. Sometimes I wish I could see what goes on inside her head because sometimes I think she reserves herself or overthinks and I’d like to give her a big hug.

@binniebutter - amie... oh amie 🙄 just kidding 😂 amie well... I also met her while playing among us in that same group. we played a lot with each other and I find that nice BECAUSE I CANT REMEMBER WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT DURING THE FIRST TIME WE PLAYED. I think I do remember laughing about her and gen tho. In our first gc I remember thinking that she had a bright personality and could keep the conversation going. I also find out we live about an hour away so I was able to connect with her about that (I also was so excited just because IVE NEVER MET AN ONLINE FRIEND IN THE SAME STATE) After that we played among us a lot together and I just remember thinking amie was EVIL. She was funny though and I felt comfortable around her. Now... I honestly think I’m pretty close to amie emotionally. It’s very rare that I put down my guard and talk to someone about certain things (I don’t really think I’ve talked to her about certain things tho) I still feel as though I can talk to her or that I can cry or rant to her without feeling judged. I don’t know how much she’s come to me about, but anytime I try to comfort her i feel like I get to know her better. I usually don’t start joking with my friends and being “rude” to them unless I know that they know I love them, which is why I’m starting to show amie sarcasm at times ☺️ I may of written too much 😅

@hyukaite I ACTUALLY REMEMBER MY FIRST IMPRESSIONS OF KAT. oml we’d send asks every now and then and I remember thinking she was a crack head. From the videos I’d see her post to that one drawing. Man if only I could go all the way back to it, but it was monthssss ago. I also remember relating to her about having to help our sisters with math 💀. I wanted to be her friend after seeing her interact with some of my other moots, but I was too shy to actually message her so I stuck with sending in asks every now and then 😂 then we started playing among us together. I remember thinking “NOOOO SHE STOLE YELLOW” which led to me falling in love with the dark green among us color JFKAJFLW. After that I remember getting betrayed by her in the game SO MANY TIMES. she killed me during the Simon says task... to tell you what grudge I hold... I still remember it. ITS SUCH A HARD TASK AND SHE DIDNT LET ME FINISH IT. She also killed me in electrical when I thought she was INNOCENT. Now... kat I don’t even know how to describe her. She has many aspects to her that I love. She also is able to help me think straight whenever I let my anger get to me.

@yawnjunie - I thought she was shy at first because when I first met her she didn’t talk much, so I felt bad because I thought she didn’t feel all that welcomed by us (no specific reason we were just introduced to blu so abruptly 😂) After that I think I was intimidated by her at first JFJAKFJERI. We also compared our schools and our grade mindset which I think really opened my eyes a little bit more. I still believe she’s really smart Zknfaltn. She makes me laugh though and she also started the network moacabinet. She’s really sweet with so many ideas, but I feel bad because sometimes I think she gets stressed easily. She’s not on much, but everytime she’s online I’m blessed with her presence.

@kkuming - gigiiiii! my first impression of gigi was fairly simple. We met on the au group chat and she seemed really sweet. I wanted to try and give gigi a warm welcome and make sure she felt comfortable. I wish I remembered more about our first meeting. I DO HOWEVER remember thinking she was v v innocent. I sat back and watched gigi get thrown into the group and laughed my ass off at how she interacted with kat. I was worried that because the others were already so comfortable with her and joking around about things that she may actually think that the “divorce” or whatever it was that kat and her had would make her upset, so I wanted to remind her that I appreciated her Zofnakfjeof. She also was taking a lot of stressful classes so I could only hope this girl didn’t die underneath all that stress. Now I- she’s crazy guys. Just kidding 😂 she’s still really sweet and jokes around with all of us. I’m glad she’s online a lot more now. she’s also really funny.

@lipbeom - I’m like 99.9% sure rynn was the first person I ever really talked to on tumblr. I thought she was a really good writer and saw that she was a senior as well, so I was glad that I wasn’t the only one on tumblr that was going to suffer through the last year of school. I was so glad when she messaged me first like Y’ALL HAVE NO IDEA. When I first met her I remember thinking she was really sweet AND BEYOND SMART. I’m really grateful for rynn and I actually miss her a lot because I feel like I don’t interact with her as much as I should. She was very supportive and still is. It’s only been a few months since I first talked with her but I’m reminiscing 😂 She also got me hooked on selling sunset WHICH WAS AMAZING but I was talking like the girls on the show for WEEKSSSSSSS.

@bbhyeoliskooks - I don’t really remember how I came across her, but I realized she was a new moa writer and wanted to check her out. My first impression... hmmm I guess you could say that I believed she was very grateful even when she didn’t have to be. Sometimes she makes me feel old 💀 but she’s reminds me a little bit of my sister... just way sweeter. She’s very loyal and anytime you tell her you’ve posted something oml she’s wonderful. She’s the type of person who is really supportive and I appreciate that, but sometimes I feel like I don’t give her enough of ittttt. I really need to go stalk her blog now as for some reason I don’t see her notifs half the time. I’m really proud of her and think she’s one of the sweetest people on tumblr NOT TO MENTION SHE SINGS BEAUTIFULLY.

@txthearteu - oml cj 😂 she is also one of the first people I talked to on tumblr. I don’t really remember our first impression tho :/. I DO REMEMBER I READ ONE OF HER STORIES THO and i sent an ask about it because she deserved the recognition for it. Hmmm at first I believe I was intimidated because she is older than me 😂 however she was so extremely sweet and I loved talking to her. I tried talking about various different things with her because I wanted our conversation to continue hehe. She stays feeding me 😌 and even if I can’t physically eat del taco I get full off of the love and support cj gives me. My eyes light up when I see her in my notifs. I think she deserves the world and I always want to be there for her. I don’t think I can ever repay her for the love she’s given me.

@sung4oon - SAM I SWEAR IF YOU CHANGE UR URL BEFORE I HAVE A CHANCE TO POST THIS! I met her when her url was... 👁👄👁 lixxie sumtin. I think it was lixieebear. I truly don’t remember her first impression 💀 the only thing I remember was thinking that she was also a crack head. She was really funny and sweet and DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE WHOLE BRAINCELL THING. I should’ve given her my brain cells for christmas. I still think she’s really fun to talk to and I literally try to remind myself as much as possible that I need to go stop by and send an ask every now and then. Even so she still says hi to me ☺️

@beomiebear5 - R A I N A. hehehehehehe I actually love this first impression for me. At the time I saw her anon asks to rynn. I saw that she was going to start posting stuff on her blog soon and she gave a hint about how to find her. Ofc I let rynn do that herself BUT I went searching KFJSIFIWFKW I couldn’t help it I saw it as a challenge. My first impression was rlly just that she was sweet. Then after a while KFJAOFJWOF I really love interacting with her and seeing her rants. Gosh she’s so funny and ✨inspires✨ me. I’m always down to talk to her because she’s amazing and sweet.

@magicisland9-34 - lillie ☺️ I honestly don’t remember our first impression? I do however remember when she first sent an ask! I would always get so excited when I got an ask from her 😂 I loved talking to her and she let me ramble on and on. Whether that be about gymnastics or ballet. Once again even lillie is sweet, but she’s betrayed me for siding with amie about Christmas 😤. She’s also one of the people that I try to remind myself to go and visit their blog and see what they’ve posted.

@spookybias - if I remember correctly gen was the first one who reblogged my about me post, which ended up allowing others on this app to see that I was a new writing blog. She was also one of the first people I followed and one of the first who followed me, so I was really grateful and thought she was beyond helpful and nice. I also really believe she’s a great writer and i admired how she would tell things how they are. She’s always been sweet to me even if she’s threatened to shoot me a while back 😤. OH YEAH we also played among us together in that group as well and I always suspected her at one point. IT WAS BECAUSE THE ONE TIME I TRUSTED HER SHE KILLED ME.

@bffsoobin - My first impression of Sara was pretty simple like I found her blog and fell in love. she writes so well and I’ve loved everything I’ve read from her. I thought she was really pretty and pretty funny too. When she’d talk about some of her stories revolving school it honestly made my day as well. I admire her especially because she’s such a good writer and LET ME TELL YOU when she followed me back I think I did a little cheer. I was reading her fics before I even started writing on tumblr.

@soobcxre - I saw Sara around because we had a lot of moots in common and when I saw them interact I would just think about how I wanted to befriend her 😂. When she texted me I got so excited, but I WAS SO CAUGHT UP IN SCHOOL TOO. She’s also really sweet ajfjwkfjw and I’m glad to have met her.

@lovesickchoi - MADDIE 🤩 I.... I don’t remember my first impression of her 🥲. It may of revolved around asks? I think I ended up trying to get to know her more at the time I was trying to get to know yoonie. I say this because I remember always seeming to get their urls mixed up... I think it’s because the h at the beginning. I LITERALLY DONT REMEMBER HOW WE STARTED INTERACTING. She’s also an amazing writer tho! Now I still think she’s sweet and we’ve talked about yeonbin together 😂.

@sunoo-luvs - 🥺 zaara JFJAJRKSKF literally my first impression was “cute.” That still stands btw. She’s absolutely the sweetest and is really considerate of others IM SCARED BECAUSE SHE MAY APOLOGIZE FOR THINGS THERES NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE FOR. Even so she can easily add happiness to people’s day with just a hi and a hug.

@i2gyu - I- first impression: scary. IM KIDDING wait... actually even though that was a joke because she used to stop by and say “boo” I MAY OF ACTUALLY FELT INTIMIDATED BY HER AT FIRST. I think one of the first times we interacted was about a network and at the time I was ready to join a network SO I FELT SO BAD FOR SAYING NO. Afterwards tho I realized how nice she was and I always end up getting a little energetic once I see she’s sent in an ask. One day I’m scared I won’t see her change her url or blog, but that’s if she does again.

@fairycore-gyu - I haven’t interacted with anyone new recently and when I saw kira that obviously changed 😂. I related to her with music taste and stuff. LET ME TELL YOU when someone seems to have the same music taste I JUST my eyes light up. She was really welcoming and I instantly felt like I could message her anytime. I also just realized she’s a pisces 🥺.

@yoonjunie - I just remember thinking ooooo new moa writer! I think anyone who comes across her can say she’s very welcoming and sweet + she deserves everything she has. I really just wanted to support her 😂 I need to interact with her more and read more from her blog.

@hyeyoonwrites - yoonie 🥺 AHHHH okay 😂 first impression: LITERALLY THE SWEETEST. I know I’ve said that so many people here are sweet but yoonie is a different kind of sweet. I don’t know every single time I’ve interacted with her has felt like a soft hug. She’s supported me a lot and I really need to check up on her more frequently I feel guilty about it aifoshf.

@txtextme - gon I- even though we haven’t talked much she’s extremely funny and relatable. she just has this vibe that I love about her. I know I don’t have much to say, but I had to add her because she’s left an impact.

@yeonbins - VIVI HAS WONDERFUL GIFS. Every now and then I’ll see her post some stuff just talking and akfjskf. I mainly remember (I think) Starbucks getting her name wrong. Her names so pretty tho. I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE HOW MUCH OLDER SHE WAS THAN ME. I also played among us with her for a lil... I was scared she was gonna murder me 😂.

[radiorenjun]

➶ angie's 1 k followers ! ! !

we're. at. 1 k? excuse me? ( ˚ ߜ˚)!!!

I'm overly emotional right now, YOU'RE KIDDING RIGHT? BYE I NEVER THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD COME. dude dude I remember joining this platform back in 2018 to read some Thomas Sangster fanfictions and leaving because I got bored. Then I got back in when 2019 started and that was when I first really got into kpop. And that was when I started writing Stray Kids drabbles (i should really get back on that I missed writing for skz I swear)

God what? I remember just writing for fun and to fulfill my fantasies of NOT being single with like 0 followers (except gwen of course) and wow. I can't believe I got this far with writing fanfictions. Damn, yall are true simps for your idols if you follow me fr. The fact that simply last year I went from publishing once every few months to once a week? Is fucking insane. The fact that I thought this blog was probably going no where and I should just enjoy my time with writing fanfictions and now I have like 36282&28 friends to chat and a huge ass following?

hihi ⋆ ˚｡⋆˚��(♡ ॑ᗜ ॑♡)⸝ ˚⋆｡˚ ⋆

THANK YOU SO DAMN MUCH? I'm literally in tears as I write this what the fuck, it's been two whole years since i started writing kpop fanfiction here and I had some ups and downs along the way. Im about to get a bit sentimental here so bear with me hehe

Originally this blog was suppose to be a place where I fulfill my boyfriend fantasies despite my issues with disliking physical affection (or affection in general) and to keep my mind busy so I don't spiral down into my depression again and again.

Ngl still is.

But damn, to think that now I can chat other people freely who has the somewhat of the same interests as I do? Dude that's fucking insane. I made some hella amazing friends here too and I'm so fucking grateful and happy that I can talk to them everyday and fangirl bout writing and nct and skz and everything else in general.

I'm not online 24/7 but mostly because of school shit since I'm bout to graduate soon but DUDE DAMN ITS HELLA FUN TO BE HERE. I contemplated on deleting this blog a billion times whenever my life gets too much, but I'm so glad I didn't.

Often times I would go to tumblr as some sort of escape from reality. I would act all hyper and chaotic even tho I don't feel the best in reality, but seeing my moots or followers interact or have a laugh at something or something I say always made my day. Im not the type to go on bout my problems so imma stop getting emotional here LMFAO

THANK YOU TO ALL MY MOOTS, MY FOLLOWERS AND LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE WHO HAS INTERACTED W MY STORIES. I assure u I have more full fics as soon as i finish idni (which only has approx three chapts left by the way! I'm starting a new series very very soon!)

YOU ALL MEAN SO MUCH TO ME AND I DONT THINK ILL STILL BE BREATHING AT THIS POINT IF IT WERENT FOR ALL OF YALL. Fr the amount of times I feared I would disappoint everyone if I leave IS UNCANNY LMFAOOOO

Thank you for being the reason why I'm staying. Im not planning on leaving anytime soon but I'm sure once I do I'll leave with a positive impact HAHA

Here's a pic of me doing a bridge to celebrate this milestone!

Sexy Bridge reveal look at my 157 cm ass doing a sloppy bridge pls I wasn't even trying in this picture what the fuck is with that bush of a hair. I look s k I n n y here tf. I went 🦗🦗🦟🦗🦟🦟🦗 peak my sexy canvas at the back oh my god that floor do be looking shinier than my will to live dayum. Also feet reveal❗❗❗❗ don't mind my dads bike over there I can't ride a bike LMFAOOO

Anyways, this is angie otherwise known as radiorenjun. Thank you for having me and thank you for everything, I will continue to try and dominate the world with my extroverted ass, thank you and good night/morning/afternoon/evening/dawn/dusk/fucking/renjun/iloveyall/barkbark

WAIT WAIT

REMEMVER WHRN I USED TO GO BY TENSHI-CHANXXX? GLAD WE GOT THAT OUT OF THE WAY LMFAOOOOOO

[prettyboykatsuki]

im not a moot but whenever i see u on my dash i think of u as someone with bestie vibrs, the one who doesn't take any shit but is so nice and gives great hugs for some reason. and then there are times where you talk a certain way and it reminds me how u actually are on the dom side of things and it makes me step back (virtually) for a bit hAAHAHHAA can u hear the vv submissive undertones in this phrasing gahd it's all the childhood trauma but yeah

your recent response to an ask reminded me of that again today hahahaha the past days i was thinking "awwie they're so cute & amazing" because of your interactions with ur anons and then bam today u talk about railing people to the ground

that was a brain fart lmao have a good day (or hope you had a good one? im not sure what time it is there) take care! ✨

this is so cute DLKJFSK hi baby thank you so much i am glad my energy is good i try my absolute best. i think its important to be nice and honestly i find it endearing!! i like when i come off as kind though in general like that makes me happy

DKJFSDKLS i find a lot of times w internet doms if u will, ppl get very try hard so i try my best to only talking about domming in context when ppl ask me or prompt me about it or at the least be lighthearted if that makes sense. like i dont like to take myself too seriously which is why i never reply to things super seriously

[lovingonrepeat]

I love how you tag ur moots with ‘my lovely friends’ like ahhh you’re so adorable!!! If I could ask, what’s one thing you like about each of them??? You don’t have to if you don’t wanna, but your interactions are just so cute <3

Sorry I took so long to respond to this but I wanted to try my best and so I tried my best to remember all of my mutuals!

@lxveshotaro is a great listener and really nice and is super funny and I love Nana!

@skzctnightnight is honestly a godsend and helped me through a really really hard time I had recently so I’m forever grateful for her. Also bel’s writing is AMAZING

@drippinlovetalk is just so sweet and honestly is one of the reasons I was inspired to make my blog, so kudos to Heather for being awesome

@staranonthoughts is such a kind and down to earth person, and star literally has MOST SOOTHING VOICE EVER SERIOUSLY

@euphoricsunflowers calls me bubs all the time and it just makes me happy. I’m very happy to have her in my life and we’re both very similar so I feel like we can relate to each other on a lot of things and issues. I love emma so much. stan talent stan emma

@vanillaknj is so encouraging and I love Alex’s writing so much and the speed at which she puts out content is honestly goals

@xiaoxuxis is so supportive of me and makes me feel good when she gives me feedback on my fics

@capriccio-con-espressione is honestly such a gentle person and is so empathetic and sweet to me I will protect Trinzie at all costs

@armysantiny is so sweet and adorable and doesn’t allow me to think my writing sucks because Minnie will constantly hype me up lol

@victon127 is really nice and even tho we haven’t talked that much, I really enjoyed our interactions, and she gave me a bomb ass astrology reading LOL

@loverhyuck is just a genuine soul and their writing is super awesome too and I just really enjoy seeing them on my dash <3

@wildernessuntothemselves even tho me and moe don’t really talk she is literally GOALS when it comes to writing and I do a little happy dance whenever she posts anything ever

@starstruckdombbaby just has this very nice aura about her i don’t know how to describe it but she seems like someone who would be amazing to be around.

@moonlightlino IS SO SWEET AND EVEN THO WE DONT TALK MUCH I THINK YOU DESERVE THE ENTIRE WORLD 

@channiewoo has been so supportive of me from the beginning and helped to encourage me to make the plunge and actually post my fic, and I’ll forever be grateful. Plus Eri is just an all around quality person lol

I’m positive I’m missing people and I’m so so sorry to anyone I happened to forget! Also I’m so not adorable but I appreciate it so much!!!!!!!!!!! This was such a cute question I had fun hyping everyone up.

[theboyz-engup]

Okay, so I just saw your post about how you shipped your mutuals with ateez and was wondering if you could do that with the Boyz, it’s a very interesting idea that’s how got me curious!!!!!!

oh man do i even have 12 moots im ~ stressed ~ bc im gonna be out here tagging ppl i really don’t know too but here we go iG??

Sangyeon: @sanqyeonn​ - wbk tho theres no real explanation needed here other than you’re both actual angels who deserve each otherJacob: @shizziebo​ - ik your bias isn’t him anymORE but i really always felt like someone like jacob would be the best for you because he’d be able to deal with all that energy you have and would never think it was like overwhelming or too much? like he’d love it as much as i do lowkey ok next!Younghoon: @byungchxnnie​ - i feel like since we haven’t really spoken a lot i can’t say much about this other than the vibe of your blog and tags really,, give me younghoon vibes idk??Hyunjae:  @whateverbroski​ -don’t ask me why but i feel like hyunjae’s stability would be something you really cherish? we dont really talk but from the limited interactions we’ve had, i always sense a hyunjae vibe to youJuyeon: @teddywoojinie​ - im out here giving you ur bias but thats deadass bc i genuinely think you guys actually fit as people like we talked about how ppl think he’s boring n shit but hes actually really interesting once you take the time to properly get to know him and i feel like that slow burn kinda love is so?? you?? idkKevin: @bbanqs​ - ave bb i know it be with you and yeon but i can’t shake this feeling like,,, idk smth about you and kevin makes my heart go boom because its like you’re both so artistic and you’re always like idk a warm presence? whenever we talk which i think is a lot like kevin?Chanhee: @cheekpockets-q​ - love that your signs don’t match up BUT its okay because idk you are both like the loud and fun types, where you’re weird but not in an unsettling way, in a way where you wanna get to know you more and more and i think that’s smth interesting both of you shareChangmin: @nyuqyu​ - not just bc hes ur bias and i love u but also because i really feel like changmin’s hard working qualities are v much reflected in you and no matter what you always try your best, even if you don’t think you’ll succeed or you don’t know like where you’re going n i really love that parallelHaknyeon: @tbzhours​ - ill scream this from the rooftops tbh like the kind of personality i think you embody is very haknyeon for me just because you’re not afraid to be vulnerable n open and honest w your blog which is smth i think is a very hak traitHwall: @kqyvnho​ - dont ASK me why like idk you’re a lot more talkative i think than hwallie is but that doesn’t MATTER bc i just get the feeling like you’d honestly get on really well, (esp with your aspects but u didn’t hear that from me!)Sunwoo: @tbzd​ - im p sure you get clowned for this a lot and this is NOT why i put you here, i just feel like from your tags n stuff like idk you’re able to put up with a lot of teasing n stuff if it comes from the right place which is definitely a sunwoo flex tbhEric: @carrotkyu​ - i can’t even explain why or how i think this is you but you’re just so sweet?? like you’re honestly the kindest person n when we first talked all we did was ramble on and on and i was like damn thats some eric behaviour so,,, we out here

[doyoung]

we're not mutuals anymore but somehow when i see nct urls sometimes i think 'is that..ivie??' and lord and behold there u are! hope you're doing well~ i think about you sometimes and miss you but feel weird getting in touch since i don't think we have much in common anymore lol but please know i think of you often and send you good vibes!! mwah

ahhh, stop this is so sweet im literally about to cry lol thank you for thinking of me?? im probably going to sound hella dramatic but it really makes me happy that you think of me so purely ;;;;we were mutuals huh? is it that i unfollowed? if so chances are that i didnt do so purposefully!! especially if we’ve interacted before! idk how long ago it was that we were moots but i accidentally deleted my blog a while back and since it wasn’t really a planned deletion lmao i didn’t like have a list to refollow? so i had to refollow everyone off trying to remember their urls which wasn’t really helpful considering i have the memory of like bread LOL even just like a few days ago i saw someone i used to follow and was like WOW I FORGOT ABOUT THEM HOW swdwsdews but if it is that you unfollowed then thats okay too i dont hold any bad feelings!! im always here to talk to whenever anyone feels like talking!! even if we don’t have much in common anymore i wouldn’t mind hearing about any new interest an old friend has!! so yeah, thank you sooo much for thinking of me and sending me good vibes chances are i do think of you too from time to time and send positive vibes to you as well~~ im always here to talk to if you’re comfortable enough with it!!!

[hadjii-blogs-undertale]

[23 days later]

In reference to https://hadjii-blogs-undertale.tumblr.com/post/163800444030/

@lynns-art-blog

...

And honestly, @everyone-needs-a-hoopoe because there's things in here that go for you too. Please read it through to the end. Or just skip to the very end at first and then go back and read through if you need.

I really, really, really didn’t actually want to get off my butt and do this, for multiple reasons. And not just cuz I’m a lazy jackhole with depression who doesn’t want to do anything in general. But recent events have brought things to a head, and I cannot remain silent any longer.

First, I should like to clarify just where I stand as regarding the Undertale fandom.

The Undertale fandom is a beautiful thing. It is extremely imperfect but I love the fandom and will continue to do so for as long as I am able.

Second, I should like to clarify where I stand as regarding Undertale itself.

It will be difficult however, because I love Undertale more than I am capable of putting into any transferable medium that I know of.

Am I a bit emotionally over-invested in Undertale?

Heck. Yes.

I also don't care that I am.

Undertale has brought more joy and happiness and meaning to my life than literally anything else save my family who raised me and loves me, my religion, and a shortlist of friends, some of whom I only have so dear to my heart because of Undertale, so the point is moot.

I can't say that Undertale cured my depression, because it didn't.

What it did do is it showed me at a critical point in my life that there's something outside the grey murky mire.

I'd considered myself an emotionally open person before Undertale. This was only vaguely true. Current me cannot comfortably say that old me was emotionally intelligent without severe disclaimers.

Old me was an emotionally awkward dirtbag who had some idea of how to be a person but on the whole was completely clueless.

I had forgotten how to feel. Like, really feel. And not just from the depression.

I could occasionally get hits from certain songs and I absolutely lived for those moments but the songs would rapidly hit their saturation levels and I'd be cold again.

Then Undertale came along. I loved the game long before I played it, discovering things about it slowly through an endless flood of my tumblr feed.

It looked like a rather good, cute, compelling little game. Eventually I decided to write a bit of fanfiction about it because it looked really good and I wanted to churn out what would happen if GLaD had an interaction with a murdery timeline.

So I went and researched. I dug and I dug and I dug. This wasn't all of my research, but on one particular tumblr alone I went through 700-odd undertale posts.

Between that and pouring out my heart and soul into the writing as I discovered just how much I could care about these things, or care in general really, I found that I'd left the door open, and something came back. A whole lot of something.

Undertale is a Happy™ game about Happy™ things.

I had learned that maybe sad things weren't all bad back from the days of Background Pony. The difference being, Background Pony had a disappointing, absurd ending. They'd won the right even by my sappy heart to have a sad ending, then they completely botched it. I'd associated one of the most significant songs I know of with it, and they failed terribly.

But Undertale had a good ending. As aggravating as it is to not be able to keep Asriel, much less Chara, in the bounds of the game itself, that's part of the point of the ending. So there was no knee-jerk shock. While it is true that in a practical Undertale implementation, unbounded by the Game Maker engine, fuelled by the raw power of Determination, human spirit, and imagination, surely something more could have been achieved. But that does not take away from the coherent ending of Undertale.

There is a lot of pain in Undertale. So much pain.

It is overwhelming and vivid and searing and scorching and so very, very tangible and understandable and real. Not that the events of the game are real, well, as far as I can tell. The emotions are deep and real, I mean.

This was to me as the gas leak was to Vinny Santorini in Atlantis.

Due to the combined pressure of the mental overhaul Undertale was giving me, and the softness and vulnerability it re-introduced, throwing in re-learning certain cold facts about how much the powers-that-be at my previous job didn't care about doing good work, only making money, more severely than I had previously believed from last year, I lost my ability to continue driving there and showing up every day. Now, due to the way the contract works, and my having left the job gracefully, I am free to go back whenever I want. I was not fired. There are many employees who just go there, work as long as they can, then leave and wait for next season to come back. Their efforts are appreciated, especially when all heck breaks loose at the beginning of the on-season because all the bugs in the software that weren't found yet are harsly exposed. What happened with me is not ideal, nor is it rare or even unusual at this place. In about 3 months I could walk in the door and they'd welcome me with a smile and I'd get back to politely telling people that they're wrong and clueless and fixing their crap for them and half the time doing their job for them. (as if that's terribly different than my current job... just in person now instead of over a phone)

Anyways, so, Undertale hurts. Loving Undertale so deeply hurts a lot.

But it's also happy. It has so much happiness. It's so bright and wonderful. It's a warm, soft, fuzzy hug from goatmom and a slice of butterscotch pie. It's making spaghetti with Papyrus, only using an actual recipe this time and making it turn out well. It's watching anime until 4 am with Alphys and Undyne and suppressing giggles at seeing the two precious gay babies asleep and cuddling. It's hugging Sans and telling him it'll be okay. It's having a lovely tea party with Asgore and Muffet.

It's kissing a sad sapient golden flower on the forehead, buying a bar of chocolate and raising it in the air as a toast before eating it.

Bittersweet happiness sometimes but so very, very good and I love it and I really cannot get enough.

I'm addicted. Addicted to feeling again.

As the band Ghost says, "From the pinnacle to the pit, it is a long way down."

I haven't been to the absolute bottom, in that I haven't been institutionalized/hospitalized/just straight up killed by my depression, But I have been in the shower for 4 hours before from 2 am to 6 am at college, for one thing, so uhhh, nobody can say that I'm utterly clueless about such things without looking like a lunatic.

https://hadjii-blogs-undertale.tumblr.com/post/164567314340

Posts like the above still rip my heart out every time I see them. I've long since re-associated the song mentioned earlier with this particular point of note of Chara.

It's not entirely pleasant, no, but it makes me feel so alive and real and like I'm an actual human being and not an emotionless, soulless automaton covered in flesh.

And the happy posts are just that much brighter because of the contrast.

https://hadjii-blogs-undertale.tumblr.com/post/164689197750 https://hadjii-blogs-undertale.tumblr.com/post/164498003145 https://hadjii-blogs-undertale.tumblr.com/post/164161681835 https://hadjii-blogs-undertale.tumblr.com/post/164061257705

Some people can get by on just fluff alone. There's nothing wrong with that. This is just the way I personally operate. As for me, I've had too much saccharine positivity and "oh dont be sad everything is completely fine and theres nothing to be sad about youre not depressed just get up and go to work son!"

sorry got sidetracked and a little oddly specific there anyways

So the point is from the above wall of text that I have a lot of investment in Undertale and it means a lot to me.

Now, it's time for me to pull receipts.

One receipt, to be exact.

On a semifamous Undertale blog, that I still have not responded to, and quite possibly never will, unless you count this post as a response.

http://charadreemurr.tumblr.com/post/157052680490

I literally couldn't even read their last response for a solid two months because my eyes would skim off the words because they were full of so much utter crap. When I did, I was sorry for it, because it was still so much crap. And no, this isn't like the average tumblr receipt pull, because a lot of the time, a given person has changed for the better, and the receipts you're pulling are for a dramatically different person. This person has not changed and as best as I can tell will never change, or at least not for the next decade or so, unless something dramatic happens. They were the OP of the twitter bustercluck. If you don't know, don't ask, because I don't feel like getting into that right now. I may do so later though in a different post.

All I was trying to do was share a little positivity, and I was met with discourse, hostility, and self-righteousness.

"And second “biological gender” is a statement rife with discontent-"

Pardon my french but wtf m8?

Since then I have learned more thoroughly that in more modern usage, that sex and gender don't have ambiguity and don't need "biological" and "identity" modifiers for clarification, so to a limited extent, they were correct.

However, this does not excuse their behavior. There are many people, myself included back then, that because of their upbringing are uncomfortable saying the word "sex" in any context. I am not now, but I was then, which is why I used "gender" with modifiers for clarification. I gave them multiple chances in earlier reblogs to realize that I was just trying to share a bit of happiness. I clearly conveyed the belief that what's in one's pants doesn't necessarily align with what's in one's head and that it's not a problem. I also clearly stated that when referring to Frisk and Chara, one should use they/them.

And yet, they chose to perceive a threat where there was none. They prefaced their statement with "Yikes" then "Im gonna assume the best here though because i wanna assume people are good"

And completely did not follow through on that.

Statement rife with discontent, indeed.

I was rather hurt by this. Especially, especially because of the uniqueness of their url. They are the one and only charadreemurr. That's a very particular title, and they ought to live up to it.

And here, they did not. Unless Chara Dreemurr really is supposed to be a pretentious self-serving self-righteous paranoid uptight jackhole of a binch. In which case, congratulations, they succeeded.

I showed the post to a different trans friend of mine, and they were shocked by the post as well, looked through their tumblr, and declared the person "basically their least favorite type of person".

To this day, I feel uneasy just seeing the word "yikes" sometimes.

I have mentioned it a few times to some people but this really sent me for a loop. I almost left the fandom on the spot, like far too many good people have done when they were burned by the toxic side of the fandom.

And honestly, if I'd lost Undertale at such a key point in my life, with my job already falling apart, and the other crap I was going through at the time, especially with the election, I cannot safely say that I'd still be here. With the friends that I wouldn't have made solid yet, I probably would have attempted suicide.

And believe me, I'm an engineer. I would not have survived. Knives, pills, guns, rope, water, heights, motor vehicles, police, fire, bleach, all are too unreliable for me. I know exactly how I would do it, if I were to ever do it.

Yeah, I know, it's not anyone's job to make sure I don't commit suicide beyond my own. People who threaten others with their own suicide are horribly manipulative. I am not threatening anyone with my suicide here. I'm not saying "ermagersh dont break up with me or ill literally kill myself" What I am saying is "X happened to me in the past and it's made me want to kill myself" Suicide baiting someone is a terrible thing to do. Accidental baiting someone is not someone's fault, as it's accidental, but generally one should try to avoid it. Very similar to triggering somebody. Don't trigger people. If you do, apologize, and do better in the future, and be more consistent about tags and crap.

Just for the record, due to that and other things that have happened to me, I know that I am not now and not ever going to die by my own hand.

Because, I stood up. I turned around. And like Captain America, I said "No. You move."

Well, in my head. I didn't actually say anything to them.

And I stayed.

And that has made all the difference.

I have a great job now that pays moderately well. I have a wonderful aspec girlfriend now. My life still sucks in so many ways but I actually oftentimes see a light at the end of the tunnel. The world is crap and it's going to get crappier but not everything will be bad forever.

Now, we get to the center of the issue, having explained some needed context.

Nonbinary Frisk and Chara.

I love nb Frisk and Chara.

I have not and will never make a Frisk or Chara that is anything but nb.

At one point, a certain Frisk was going to maybe use She/They (or He/They, hadn't decided yet) instead of just They when they became a parent, but I scrapped that idea long before any of this.

It is completely correct to use they/them pronouns when talking about Frisk and Chara in general. These are all that are used in the game itself.

The pertinent question though is does this mean that Frisk and Chara are canonically nonbinary, and what of people who make variants/instances that aren't nonbinary?

Thus far, most of the argument I've seen in favor of nonbinary being a forcible requirement is only slightly more solid than claiming that the Boss in the Saints Row series must be nonbinary, as an example.

Yes, it is true that in SR2 and later, one chooses the boss's sex.

However, they also choose a voice, and the voice doesn't necessarily have to match the physical sex. Trans and NB Bosses are completely plausible within the game's canon. All dialogue just refers to the Boss as They/Them, regardless of player choice, to the best of my knowledge. Or just refers to them as "The Boss". In SR:GOOH, Satan (yes, the literal Prince of Darkness, ruler of literal actual Hell) refers to The Boss as "They" so yeah. Anyways.

Honestly the strongest argument I've seen in favor of NB Frisk and Chara being canon is "Because NB people could use the representation!" Which boils down to "Because I said so!" Which boils down to "Because f*** you, that's why"

Now, I personally love this reasoning and I'm already on board, but with three quirks.

1. I can see why other people may not be so satisfied with this. 2. I cannot see this as an absolute requirement preventing any other possible interpretation of Frisk and Chara being okay. 3. I do not find this a remotely strong enough reasoning to condone attacking other people over it.

I personally headcanon NB Frisks and Charas being by far the dominant kind across the entire Undertale trunk. And I look across the internet at the many, many wonderful creative people who have instanced Frisk and Chara, and I see that this is so. And this is how it should be.

Frisk and Chara are excellent NB representation.

I quite firmly believe Tobyfox intended this to be so, and created them as such.

On a side note, I just found out the "my last wish for undertale is that when discussion of it fades it dies peacefully instead of morphing into a garbage cesspool" tweet was faked. Probably should've figured that out a long time ago, that's not quite how toby tweets.

...

Anyways,

https://twitter.com/UnderTale/status/644614840925978624

Tobyfox, the one who made Frisk and Chara so readily NB, who put so much NB representation into the game in general, did not ask for this. He did not create them to be sticks to beat others with. They were a gift of kindness. To say "Hey. Hey you. You matter and are important and are valid. Have two complex characters who have no indicated and strongly ambiguous gender, not even barriers blocking a particular interpretation."

Thats the kicker. No barriers blocking a particular interpretation. The road goes both ways.

Frisk and Chara were meant to be characters one identified with. "It's me, Chara." "It's you!"

Frisk and Chara ought to be NB, yes. Unless otherwise specified, they're NB.

Thing is, not everyone who plays Undertale is nb.

real shocker there yeah

Point is, hurting someone who's not nb for identifying with Chara or Frisk is on the same level of behavior as yelling at someone for being kin with the same character as someone else, or yelling at someone for selfshipping with the same character as someone else.

It's immature, unkind, greedy, and completely unnecessary. Even illogical.

Even if Frisk and Chara were real in their own timelines and not just pixels on a screen, there are an infinite number of instances and infinite number of variations of them.

Even if infinities don't appease one, and they demand to examine the situation proportion/representation-wise, NB Frisk and Chara dominate the multiverse.

And if that does not satisfy, then what will?

Even if the entire infinite expanse was filled solely with nb Charas and Frisks, and there was only one Frisk across the trunk who was not nb, because they were created by one author in memory of a cis person who played and loved Undertale and fought through the entire game reset after reset, in a fruitless effort to save Asriel, will you rip that from their hands, in the name of "equal representation"?

Will you be like David in the bible, who had more than anyone could ask for, and lost it all because he wanted one last thing? One more person to be theirs as well?

There is a song by Tool which is very relevant here.

https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/tool/rightintwo.html

"Don't these talking monkeys know that Eden has enough to go around? Plenty in this holy garden, silly monkeys, Where there's one you're bound to divide it. Right in two."

I'm sorry, but I cannot condone vitriol over this. I cannot condone such hateful attitude and behaviors.

Just like the antifa who was punched by another antifa at a protest because they judged them by mere appearance to be a fascist, hatred doesn't accomplish anything.

There are times and places when due to the actions of other people, there is no valid choice remaining but violence.

This is seen in Undertale. Even when attempting to run a True Pacifist route, one has to beat down Asgore, and/or Flowey. This was seen back in WWII. We could not allow the Axis powers to enslave the world and murder whomever they wished.

This is not the case here.

Yes, there are those who purposely seek to misgender Frisks and Charas all around. Such folks correctly are rebuffed and banished to the shadows. And people who argue that Frisk or Chara canonically have to be a boy or girl really need to find a new hobby.

Those, if anyone, are the enemy. The lost, clueless, angry, bitter enemy, who need to be talked to and brought into the fold of those who know better, in true Undertale MERCY fashion. Or, if they will not listen, to be sent away, and blocked if harassment continues.

Random creatives on the internet who create a Frisk or Chara, maybe modelled after themselves, maybe after someone else, doens't matter, anyways, who happen to create one that isn't NB are not the enemy. Some young unlearned cis 12 year old who wants to be like Frisk and thinks Frisk is just like them, or that they are Frisk, and has little involvement with NB matters, or perhaps just hasn't yet heard of or seen how well NB and Chara and Frisk go together, is not the enemy.

NB folk have a lot of very, very real enemies. We have a long way to go as a species. Please, do not make up enemies where there are none.

I ask anyone who attacks others solely for having a different idea of Chara and Frisk's gender to please reconsider.

Please, spread NB Frisks and Charas all around the net. Let them enter the hearts of everyone who can appreciate this beautiful game. Not through anger and aggression, but through love and kindness and patience.

If you cannot abide my having such a stance on this, Mel, then I suppose this is farewell if you must break off all contact. And if you must leave, you may keep that commission money, whether or not you ever finish the art.

Thank you to anyone who reads the entirety of my words.