#i took so much longer than i should for this

[celestie0]

gojo satoru x reader | fake marriage au [18+]

in holy matriphony ch5. child's play

ᰔ pairing. fake marriage au - neighbor&realtor!gojo x nurse!reader (ft. choso x reader & suguru x reader)

ᰔ summary. gojo satoru is your extremely annoying next-door-neighbor who you're pretty sure is the most insufferable man you've ever met. given the fact that you exclusively work the night shift at a chaotic emergency dept, just got broken up with your boyfriend of seven years, and have been taking care of your sick mother ever since her multitude of diagnoses, yet somehow your neighbor is the main source of stress in your life should speak volumes. but when your mother's medical bills start to skyrocket to more than you can manage, and you learn that said neighbor of yours has the best private health insurance plan in the country, you ask him to enter a matrimonial agreement with you for the spousal benefits all in the name of saving a few hundred thousand dollars. but you'll have to see if suffering cohabitation w him is worth any amount of money.

ᰔ genre/tags. fluff, smut, angst, enemies to lovers (sort of), annoyances to lovers (that's more like it), small town romance, fake marriage, next door neighbors, lots of bickering, suburban shenanigans, slow burn, mutual pining, gojo likes to play house but you don't, hatred for the american healthcare system, gojo always forgets to mow the lawn, jealousy, an insane amount of profanity, mentions of cigarettes, depression/anxiety; btw gojo in this fic is in his mid 30s n reader is in her late 20s

ᰔ warnings. reader in this fic has a sick mother w alzheimer's & cancer so there is secondary medical angst!!

ᰔ chapter. 5/x

ᰔ words. 4.8k

a/n. helloo my ihm friends! long time no see. hope you're all doing well and thank you so much to everyone who sent me kind messages about the whole ihm gojo ex wife thing haha. i really appreciate it :) i feel more confident about my writing decisions now, and that's all thanks to you guys! anyways, i will be posting shorter chapters for ihm going forward, so sorry if some chapters have slightly abrupt endings or stuff like that. i guess my goal is to post shorter chapters but more frequently! we'll see how it works out. anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter and see you at the bottom!!

nav. ch1 :: ch2 :: ch3 :: ch4 :: ch5 :: ch6 (pending)

Ever since admitting your mother into hospice, things have been calmer inside your mind. After passing the initial wave of agony that came with no longer hearing her voice down the hall or seeing her silhouette in her bedroom as you walked past it, you realized that…a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. No longer setting alarms at the height of every other hour to remind your mother to take her medication, no longer viewing every interaction you had with her as some form of study you needed to jot down in a binder for her neurologist’s records, and no longer driving her to all of her chemotherapy appointments, only to leave them feeling like you purposefully just took your mother to a place where they sucked all the life out of her in exchange for the slim promise of giving it all back to her someday.

Maybe it was evident in the way your shoulders felt less tense as you rolled them back, tilting your neck to the side and no longer feeling the painful strain that tugs a wince onto your face. The other day, you caught yourself humming a song as you drove to work. Your skin, usually feeling cracked and dry from stress and exhaustion, now has a slight plumpness to it like before. A more youthful glow, like the version of yourself you were before your mother became sick. The version of you that so quickly deteriorated, and one you didn’t even know still existed somewhere within you. 

There has also been time for hobbies. Rarest of occasions, you find yourself sauteing some yellow and white peaches in a saucepan over medium heat in Gojo’s kitchen, humming that song once again that’s been stuck in your head. The sundress you’re wearing matches the pink of the syrup that pools at the bottom of the pan, and you feel like you’re living your cottage core dreams in this brief moment of reprieve you’ve allowed yourself to fall into.

The sound of slippers tapping down onto the hardwood floor startles you out of your gleeful trance, and you turn your neck to the right to see a pajama-clad messy-haired Gojo shuffling his feet across the open area into the kitchen with a dark black mug in his hand.

“Why aren’t you dressed??” you ask him in a panic.

“I’ll get dressed later,” he tells you dismissively as he grabs the glass pitcher of coffee from where the coffee machine was nestled up against one of the counter corners.

“You’re stressing me out. Your mom told us to be there in two hours,” you say, putting your hands on your hips in disapproval as you hear the sizzle of the peaches in the saucepan. 

He entirely ignores you, choosing to instead drag his gaze down the form of your body. “Woooow, twice this month I get to see you in a cute dress,” he comments, pouring coffee into his mug but his eyes are still on you, “lucky me.”

“Oh Shut. Up,” you sneer at him with a harsh roll of your eyes, “your fake flattery might work on the lonely middle-aged women you seduce to make a living, but it won’t work on me.”

His shoulders push back before he slumps them slightly, his brow lifting with confusion. “It’s not fake though? I mean it. You look really nice right now.”

You point an accusatory sugar-syrup coated wooden spatula at him. “You’ve just been conditioned by the patriarchy to get a boner at the sight of a woman in a kitchen.”

“What–...no–...why do you always have to say stuff like that whenever I compliment you? Can’t you just accept it?”

You cross your arms over your chest. “I refuse to be flattered by an insolent man like you.”

He sighs, setting his coffee mug down on the counter, and you watch the way the fringe of his hair hangs over his forehead as he gazes into the contents, swirling it around with a loose grip on the handle. “Is this how it’s going to be everyday? I try to be nice, and you–...well, you know, are you.”

“Well who else should I be?”

His eyes lift up to meet yours, the slightest of a cheeky grin on his face as his eyes wander down the form of you again. “I don’t know. Someone a little…softer? Like, you’ve got this really pretty dress on, and then you’re telling me off about patriarchy-induced boners. It’s a little, uh, contradictory?”

You gasp. “You’re trying to control me. I knew it. You are poisoned by the patriarchy.”

“What?”

Your eyes narrow at him. “You have this image of a perfect and cute little wife, who’s gonna wear pretty dresses all the time, and bake stuff in the kitchen, and get all blushy when you tell her she looks beautiful, and you expect her to have this soft little personality that never argues with you or disagrees with you…ALL BECAUSE OF THE PATRIARCHY!!!”

“...I–...Okay, you’ve lost me.”

You let out a hmph! noise. “Can’t even discern his own brainwashing. Sad.”

“All of this just because I tried to tell you that you look nice?”

“I know what your ulterior motives are, you creep.”

His eyes spark a little at that, the corner of his mouth tugging up into a cheeky grin as he sets the coffee mug down onto the marble counter and he straightens his spine. You blink, watching with confusion as he crosses the distance between the two of you, to where you’re taking a small few steps backwards until your lower back presses against the edge of the island countertop. He cages you into the surface with his frame, followed by the palms of his hands sliding over the marble on both sides of you, and you feel his forearms press against the curve of your waist as he traps you in with no way out.

“S-Satoru,” you stutter, looking up at him with wide eyes, “what are you doing?”

“What do you think I’m doing?” he says, his voice deeper with a nonchalance that has you shiver, his gaze dropping to your lips when you part them slightly.

“T-The patriar–” you squeak out, but he suddenly dips his head down to kiss you.

Your breath hitches in your throat, eyes immediately closing when he moves his lips against yours, one of his strong arms wrapping around your waist to pull you closer to him and your hesitation is something that only lasts a brief second before you find yourself kissing him back. Some noise leaves his throat, deep and raw and sounding pleasantly surprised as he captures your lips more fervidly now, his hands smoothing down to hold your hips and his teeth slightly nip at your bottom lip. 

You grab a fistful of his shirt, unsure of whether you want to pull him closer to you or push him away, but the moan that you mumble against his lips only makes his grip on your hips even stronger, fingers digging into the softness through the thin fabric of your dress. 

The oven suddenly starts beeping, startling you and you pull away from the kiss with a gasp, eyes rounded as you look up at him, but his are lidded and dilated as his gaze remains glued to your lips. 

With a heaving chest, you try to push him away by a weak fist to his sternum but he’s unrelenting.

“You taste sweet,” he says, like some comment he noted in his head but accidentally voiced out loud.

“I–...” you inhale sharply, “I just ate three macerated peaches.”

“Uh-huh,” he barely acknowledges before leaning in to get another taste, but you push him away harsher this time.

His hands let go of your hips entirely, finally breaking out of that kiss-induced trance he was in, but he still remains close to you in proximity, so much so to where you can feel the heat from his body. It’s comforting almost, radiating through the soft cotton of his long sleeve shirt, and you find yourself subconsciously leaning towards him before you snap out of it too, and rock your weight back against the island countertop.

You cross your arms over your chest, hoping the flush to your cheeks isn’t showing. “Oh okay so we just casually kiss now?”

He shoves his hands into his plaid pajama pant pockets, leaning away from you slightly. “For as long as I can get away with it, yeah.”

“You are breaking the rules.”

“You never said no kissing.”

“I said no touching.”

“Ehhh kissing isn’t really touching, though, is it?”

“You sound stupid.”

“I always sound stupid to you.”

The oven starts beeping again, and you realize it’s long been preheated to the setting you had placed earlier. You slip away from him with haste, feeling his gaze on you as you press a button on the oven to turn the alarm off, and you stare at the handle for a moment or two to calm the beating of your heart down. 

Your eyes catch sight of something on the side of the fridge. A little magnet made of rubber that has the word London on it as well as the design of the Westminster Cathedral with golden accents. You recall that Gojo went on a trip to London recently, and that he didn’t bring you back any souvenirs from there like he did for your other neighbors. And you want to pretend, you want to shove it down, that incessantly childish feeling that wonders why he didn’t bring you anything back. You want to continue to pretend like it doesn’t hurt your feelings. Something so miniscule and small. But you–...well, you can’t.

You spin around to face him. “Do you hate me?” you bluntly ask.

He blinks at you. “Huh?”

“Do you, what, I don’t know, think I’m annoying or something?”

He shrugs with his hands still in his pockets. “I mean, yeah, I do think you’re annoying sometimes. But in a silly way. Like we’re just pals horsin’ around, y’know?”

You snarl at him, putting your hands on your hips and narrowing your gaze until he’s hardly even visible anymore. “No. I actually find you annoying. Like, wanna-run-you-over-with-a-bus annoying. You just have horrendous social awareness and think that everyone loves you.”

“You actually don’t like me?” he asks, like he can’t even believe that someone wouldn’t.

“Yes,” you say, “now get out of my way.” You make an attempt to push past him, purposefully knocking your shoulder into him to assert dominance but he is unfortunately much bigger than you and so all it does is make you stumble ungracefully from the recoil.

He quickly grabs your arm to steady you, and you glare up at him before yanking yourself away and then step backwards until your back hits the fridge.

He studies your demeanor for a second before taking a deep inhale, and then lets it all go in a heaving sigh. “What do I have to do to get you to lighten up a bit?” he asks.

“You really want to know?” you sneer at him.

“Yes,” he says with a slight hint of frustration in his tone.

You cross your arms. “Pay for the fucking fence.”

He blinks at you, confusion replacing whatever frustration was previously decorating his tone. “What?”

“The fence,” you reiterate with a step forwards towards him, “the one I built six months ago. The one where you laughed in my face when I told you to help pay for it.”

He leans forward. “Yeah. Because I never wanted that fence built. Like I said, it fucked up the roots on my avocado tree. You should’ve asked me before building it. In fact, it’s illegal to build a fence without joint consent of both neighboring property owne–”

“Oh my god, okay, see? This is why I can’t stand you,” you snarl at him and make another move to get past him but he easily steps in front of you to keep you from going anywhere.

With a sigh, he relents. “Fine, I’ll pay for the fence.”

You try to keep the twitching muscles of your face still as you resolutely stare up at him, pressing your lips into a thin line. Through a strained tone, you say, “No. I don’t want you to pay for it anymore.”

He lifts a brow, utterly bewildered at this point. “Huh?”

“Now it just feels like pity. And I don’t want your pity money.”

“Two seconds ago, you did.”

“Yeah, well, whatever. That was two seconds ago.”

“So…let me get this straight, you don’t want me to pitch in?”

“No. I want you to have wanted to pitch in SIX MONTHS AGO.”

“Okay but what the fuck am I supposed to do about that now?”

“NOTHING!!!” you finally snap at him, the shrill to your voice startling him slightly to where you see his shoulders jump, and his eyes are now rounded blue as he looks at you. “There’s nothing you can do about it, there’s nothing you can do to get me to ‘lighten up’ or ‘act softer’ or whatever the fuck kind of damage control you aim to achieve with me due to your pestering incessant need to be liked by every fucking person you come across. So just deal with the fact that I hate you and let me do it in peace.”

He’s silent for what feels like a long time as he blinks at you, his bottom lip pushing up slightly in a way that suggests he’s almost impressed by your little outburst, then he takes a step forward, and in that one large stride, he’s closed any distance between the two of you. Your back is up against the frigid steel of the fridge, your heels tucked under the warm rubber at the foot of it, and you’re looking up at Gojo as he towers over you, his hands still annoyingly and relaxedly shoved into his pockets.

“Do you think it’s gonna be a problem that I think you’re kinda hot when you’re mad?” he asks you.

A small puff of air leaves your lips, like you just can’t believe the audacity, but also having him this close to you suddenly made it a little harder to breathe. “C–...Can you just be fucking serious for one second?”

His head dips down, the fringe of his hair tickling your forehead, tip of his nose slightly brushing against yours, but his gaze never falls to your lips. “You think I’m not being stupid fuckin’ serious when I say that you’re hot?”

“S–” your breath hitches in your throat, and his gaze finally falls to the lick you pass over your lips, “Satoru–”

Like God himself answered to your (cognitively dissonant) prayers, the bell rings, and Gojo leans himself away from you, straightening his spine so he can glance over his shoulder towards the door, a slight look of irritation on his face through the furrow of his brow.

You blink up at him. “A–...Are you expecting someone?”

He rubs the back of his neck. “No. Don’t think so.” He sighs before shuffling around the kitchen island and across the dining hall towards the entryway of the house, and you peer at the sight from across the hall.

When he opens the door, you see Sana standing outside, dressed in mom jeans and a t-shirt with her black Coach purse slung around her shoulder, arms crossed, and you barely register the fact that she looks pissed.

“Sana?” Gojo says, “what’s up.”

She entirely ignores him when she catches sight of you, pushing right past him and into the family room that you were currently finding solace in.

“You,” she points at you, storming right up to your personal space, “what the hell did you say to Juno when you were babysitting her?!”

“H-Huh??” you squeak out, taking a step backwards. “What are you talking about?”

“You told her to fight kids at school?!” she snarls at you, and your eyes widen.

“What?” you say, your face twisting with confusion, “I–...I never said that. I just said that she should stand up for herself if she needs to.”

Sana inhales deeply with rage, leaning back and jutting her hip out as she crosses her arms again. “Yeah, well, I had to pick her up early from school today because the principal called and told me she shoved a little girl on the playground during recess, and now she’s facing suspension.”

Gojo approaches suddenly from your periphery, standing in front of you as he faces Sana. You stand on your tiptoes to peer at her over his shoulder. “What? Why would Juno do something like that?

You hear Sana start to tap her foot impatiently against the hardwood floor, and then she turns her head away from Gojo as a slight hmph! noise leaves her throat. “The why is irrelevant.”

You poke your head out from behind Gojo and glare at her, but then Gojo turns around suddenly to look at you.

“y/n,” he says, “what’s going on?”

“I–” you start, glancing at Sana again who now has a solemn look on her face with pursed lips. You glance back at Gojo, who’s looking at you with confusion and anticipation. A heat spreads down your neck from the attention of the both of them on you, and you’re not sure what the smart thing to say is, so you figure you’ll just tell the truth as it is. “...I just didn’t want her getting bullied and thinking she can’t stick up for herself.”

At that, you see Gojo’s shoulders stiffen. “Bullied?” he repeats after you, then quickly turns towards Sana, “what does she mean, bullied? Juno’s getting bullied at school?”

Sana faces him full-on, raising a stern pointed finger between the two of them “No. Satoru. Stop. You always do this. This has nothing to do with you, so don’t even start. It’s not a big deal, let’s not make it one.”

“The fuck do you mean it’s not a big deal? She’s getting bullied at school, and you want her to just suck it up?” he asks, venom dripping from his tone. 

“It’s for her benefit!” Sana exclaims. “Jun and I have spent months trying to get her into this school! We don’t want her getting kicked out.”

“Y’know, I’m–” you stutter, “I’m gonna–...I’m just gonna go upstairs,” you say, “this seems like a family matter. I think you guys should probably just settle this on your ow–”

“No,” Gojo says, pointing to the couch that you were standing in front of, “sit down.”

You sit.

Gojo turns to face Sana again, and although you can’t see his face, you imagine he’s pissed off from the way Sana’s shoulders drop slightly and her sharp expression is cut into a more sheepish one.

“Who cares if Juno is suspended for sticking up for herself? It’s the teachers’ fault for not making sure she’s safe,” he says.

“Shoving other kids is not the solution.”

“Well if you fuck around, then you find out. Kids are too soft these days.”

“This is not the 90s, Satoru.”

You watch the back and forth between the two of them for the better part of an entire minute, feeling uneasy in the hostile environment of the room, but there’s a sense of underlying familiarity between the two, one that is recognizable amongst family. And you feel rather foreign, but then remember that, technically speaking, now that you’re married to Gojo, this is your family too.

Amongst the arguing of the adults, none of you noticed that Juno had gotten out of the car in the driveway and was now standing in the doorframe of the front entrance. She looks scared and guilty, fidgeting with her fingers in front of her, and you notice her scrapes and bruises that you tended to last week were now mostly healed. 

Gojo catches sight of her, and you see his shoulders relax. “Juno, c’mere.”

With the permission, she instantly runs towards him and into his arms from where he was crouched down to the floor in order to welcome her, and then she starts sobbing.

“I’m–hic,” she cries, “I’m so–hic–I’m so sowwyyy Uncle Toru…I’m–hic–I’m sorry mommyyyy.” 

You see Sana sigh and she makes a move to brush Juno’s tear-dampened hair out of her face when Gojo pulls her away from his shoulder by a delicate hold of her bony little shoulders.

“Juno. Listen. If people are being mean to you, then you do exactly as your auntie y/n said. You stand up for yourself. And if that doesn’t work, then you cuss at them and threaten to shove their faces into the dirt until they run away with their tails between their legs. Do you understand me?” Gojo tells her.

Sana gives you a pointed look.

“Oh, I–” you put your hands up in front of you, “I didn’t say any of that last part.”

“Do you understand me?” Gojo repeats again, and Juno nods her head slowly before she falls back into him and soaks his shirt with tears. “I’m soowwwwwyyyyyy.”

Gojo pats her back a few times to comfort her, and your heart breaks for the little girl. It’s bad enough to be bullied at school, but then to be reprimanded by your mother the one time you stand up for yourself…you can imagine how emotionally exhausting that would be for a five-year-old. 

Juno sniffles, rubbing her snot all over the cotton of Gojo’s shirt, and then pulls her face away to rub at her eye with a weakly closed fist. “I–hic–I just…I just wanted him to feel–hic–the same hurt.”

“Huh? Who?” Gojo asks.

“The boy,” Juno says, “the one that shoved me today.”

“It was a boy?!?!?!” Gojo yells. “Alright. That’s it. I’m grabbing my bat.”

“Satoru.” Sana deadpans.

Sana and Gojo continue to bicker about the ethics of threatening five-year-old boys with baseball bats, going back and forth about how Gojo wasn’t actually going to do anything but just wanted to instill fear (he’s lying), while Sana isn’t exactly sold on a single pacifist thing that he says, and you sigh, because you realize you’ve become invested in one of, what you feel like will become many, of their family quarrels.

Juno sneaks around Gojo’s legs and comes up to you while the arguing is taking place in the background, and she gently taps your knee as you’re seated on the couch. “Auntie y/n,” she whispers.

You rub an eye crustie from her face and then hold her hand in yours. “Yes?”

“Thank you.”

“Mm? For what?”

She smiles at you, her cheeks pink and flush from crying but rounded now in glee. “My mommy and daddy spoke a lot today at home for first time in long time because of me. Because I listen’ded to you. Thank you.”

Your eyes narrow. “What do you mean by that, sweetheart?”

Why wouldn’t Sana and Jun be on normal talking terms? What does Juno mean that it’s been a long time? What exactly was going on at home?

“Juno,” Sana’s voice interrupts your thoughts, her arms crossed across her chest, “c’mon. Let’s go.” She points a stern finger at Gojo. “Seriously. I mean it. No baseball bats or rodent traps involved. I’ll talk to the teachers and sort something out.” She glances at you, that strict look on her face now dissolving into one of pure exhaustion. One you can imagine only a mother can face. “See you later at dinner, you two.”

Juno runs up to her mom and grabs onto her outreached hand, and you see Gojo ruffle her hair as she walks past him, her giggles ringing in the air, and then he sees them out the door. 

The air is awkward, at least to you, the second he closes the door, and when he turns around to face you, your body stiffens up.

He leans back onto the front door, crossing his arms over his chest. “Thanks,” he says, “for telling Juno to stick up for herself.”

You blink at him. “Well. I don’t feel too great about it at the moment, to be honest.”

He sighs. “I just think that Jun and Sana are raising her to be…kinda meek. I wish they’d teach her to be more confident and take up space.”

“Mhm,” you nod. Because you agree. Little girls need to learn how to be that way at a young age, because the world is seldom very kind to them.

“Well, what you said to her is what I would’ve said to her anyways,” he says.

You roll your eyes, standing up from the couch and heading back into the kitchen to presume your work on your peach cobbler. “I never told her to shove kids’ faces into the dirt. But, uh, sure, I guess so.”

You see Gojo enter the kitchen too in your periphery, but you don’t give him any glance or look or attention. From what you can see as you stir around your macerated peaches in a Pyrex bowl, he’s leaning against the island counter about three feet away from you, his hands shoved in his pockets, and he’s watching you. A slight warmth radiates in your cheeks, but you attempt to ignore the nerves by being hypnotized by the pink syrup that pools at the bottom of the bowl.

My mommy and daddy spoke a lot today at home for first time in long time because of me. Because I listen’ded to you. Thank you.

An unsettling feeling takes over your senses. It could be the past few years you’ve spent walking on eggshells around your mother, or the way you’ve become so keen to her energy as a way of staying on top of any shift in her symptoms, any single sign of disease progression, any clue that she wasn’t getting better. Any clue that she wasn’t doing okay. And you feel a sense of dread, because that skill, you realize, has now made you aware of similar circumstances in the people around you.

Not to mention, you are a child of divorce. You know what that fear feels like.

You just want to know if Juno feels safe at home.

“Hey, um…” you start, turning slightly to finally face Gojo, your eyes hesitantly flickering up to meet his gaze, “when was the last time you saw your brother-in-law? And with Sana?”

He raises a brow at you. “I just saw them last weekend for one of Juno’s dance recitals.”

“Ah…I see,” you say. You purse your lips together. 

Right. Kids say things all the time. They believe in Santa Claus and think that blueberry pancakes are called blubbery pancakes. And they sometimes read too into things, and they sometimes read too little. Surely, things must be okay. Maybe Sana and Jun had had a little argument with some stubbornly thawing cold shoulders, a demeanor that was noticed by their child, and now things have resumed to normal. That was normal. Part of every family. “That’s good to know…” 

You turn away from Gojo to stare back down into the bowl of macerated peaches again. With a furrowed brow, you close your eyes tightly to try to shake the chilly feeling in your bones, and you feel better when you open them again. The slightly numb sensation in your hand dissipates and you have enough dexterity to mix the peaches around in the bowl.

“I wonder what news they want to share with us over dinner,” you say, to quell the awkward silence.

“Hm?” Gojo hums, and you see him turn around face the counter now, hovering over the bowl of raw crumble topping you had mixed together, prodding at it with the wooden spoon. “Oh, they’re moving.”

Your head snaps to look at him. “W-What?”

“Yeah,” he nonchalantly affirms, scooping up a spoonful of the crumble. “They wanted to up-size, and move a little closer to the school that Juno’s at. I found them a nice place about an hour from here on the outskirts of the city. They just signed the papers a couple weeks ago.” And then he shoves the spoon into his mouth.

“Oh…wow,” you say. “Okay…”

“Damn,” Gojo says with surprise laced in his tone, "this is really good.” He’s staring into the bowl in awe and then scoops up some more crumble with a spoon.

You blink at him, irritated that he’s eating all your ingredients without even asking, and before you’ve even finished your dessert. It’s like he was born to piss you off.

You walk up to him and yank the bowl away, “Gimme that.” Then you pull it into the divot of your waist possessively and glare at him. 

He sighs, and then says something out loud that you’re sure he meant to keep in his head:

“I’ll get used to it.”

.

.

.

[end of chapter 5]

a/n. it feels so strange to post such a short chapter bahaha hopefully the ending isn't too abrupt. but hope you enjoyed! i'm so sorry ab the slow burn in this series aaa but i can try to assure you that it'll all be worth it hopefully lol i'm really excited for what i have planned for this series!! alsooo sorry if there are errors or anything, i'm trying to spend less time editing since it really stalls me n leads to writer's block lol. hope to see you in the next one :) much love! - ellie

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note. going foward, i will be tagging only interacts because i want to make sure i'm tagging active readers! so taglist may change every chapter. i'm also getting rid of the extended taglist bc it's too much work for me lol, so only 50 tags per chapter. i'd recommend subscribing to the fic on my ao3 so you can get email notifs :) but as always let me know if/when your taglist preferences change; please do not ask me/pressure me for updates or ask me when i am going to next update (read rules)

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[ihavemanyhusbands]

Aqua Thermae

Also on AO3

Pairing: Lucius Verus Aurelius x Fem!Reader

WC: 2.3k words

Summary: After a particularly great victory in the arena, Lucius is rewarded with both a visit to a bathhouse and you -- a high-ranking courtesan -- to keep him company.

Warnings: SMUT (minors DNI this fic is 18+), reader is a courtesan (so SW), mentions of violence, shenanigans in and out of water, oral (f receiving), unprotected p in v, maybe some historical inaccuracies? forgive my sins please, and I thinkkk that's it but lmk if anything else!

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It had been a very long time since he’d been somewhere so luxurious. One of Rome’s finest bathhouses brought echoes of a comfortable life long past in the emperor’s palace. The marble pillars and fine mosaic floors, the detailed frescoes on the walls, and a large thermal pool all for himself.

Then other flashes of memory came to him – his mother’s kindness, his father’s armor, his uncle Comodus’ booming voice, and the cross of their swords…

He shucked his heavy breastplate and immediately felt the steam on his already sweat-slick skin. He let out a long sigh, closing his eyes for a moment. If only memories were so easy to get rid of, he might not always feel so tormented.

Lavishness was not something he had ever actively sought out, even if he was entitled to it as the direct descendant to the throne, but it was strange to think he was once accustomed to it. So much had happened since his forced departure, like a hundred lives melding into one.

Now, after a long, grueling fight with a mighty rhinoceros and its fierce rider, he wanted nothing more than to luxuriate in the warm water until his head swam and his muscles no longer ached so badly.

But then he noticed you standing on one side of the pool, a carafe of wine and a platter of dates, cheese, and nuts waiting on a low table next to you. You smiled as your eyes locked and Lucius’ back immediately straightened. Not much took him by surprise anymore, but this certainly had.

“Who are you?” He asked, curious rather than irritated at your presence.

You inclined your head genially. “You may call me whatever you like.”

He huffed in amusement, giving you a once-over. “Very well, then. And who sent you here?”

“Macrinus wanted nothing but the best company for you, his champion,” you said, serving him some wine. “I am to be your prize, along with this bath.”

His eyebrows lifted infinitesimally and he looked away in an almost bashful manner. His profile was proud and handsome, kissed by the sun and the strikes of his opponents. He had the face of a hero history would always remember – Or at least you would, certainly.

He was hesitant at first, unsure if he could trust anything that came from Macrinus. But as he took another look at you, your allure was too great for him not to be stirred. He could tread carefully, but he didn’t really want to deny himself pleasure, however fleeting it may be.

“I take it your company is quite coveted around here?” He asked, approaching to accept the wine you offered.

You nodded in response, fingertips barely brushing his as he took the glass. He held your gaze as he took a sip and you almost lost yourself in the infinite blue of his eyes. 

“By the likes of who?” He asked.

“Fierce gladiators such as yourself,” you said pointedly, unable to help your wandering eyes from finding the rippling muscles of his chest. “Merchants. Senators. Even emperor Geta has had his fill of me, but Caracalla was content with just watching.”

“Let us not speak of them now,” he said, shaking his head and grimacing at the names of the bloodthirsty twin emperors. “Within these walls, it is just the two of us. Nothing more.”

You nodded in understanding as he set down his glass on the table. “Would you like me to help you finish undressing?”

“I can manage,” he said, but now his eyes roamed appreciatively over your form, barely covered by a nearly see-through shift. “But I should like to help you, so you may join me.”

“How very kind of you,” you grinned, a salacious edge to your tone. 

He stepped even closer, reaching to unclasp the bronze brooch at your shoulder. The shift fell in a puddle of fabric at your feet, your body completely bare underneath. He let out a small, shuddering breath, fingers lightly tracing one of your clavicles.

For a moment, his expression was clouded as something crossed his mind. He stared off into the middle distance, but before he could really lose himself, you decided to intervene. You pulled him in, one hand cupping the back of his head as you went on your tiptoes and brought your lips close to his ear.

“Whatever you’d like to forget, I should really like to help you,” you whispered.

“Everything,” he rasped, one callused hand grasping your hip, while the other gently tilted your head to one side so your lips would meet his.

You tasted the sweet wine on his tongue and breathed him in. He smelled of the arena — blood and sand and sweat. It was not unfamiliar to you, but it was heady coming off of him, fueling your growing desire. 

Deftly, he managed to reach between your bodies to undo his pteruges and the loincloth underneath, both joining your shift on the floor. You felt the hardness of his own want against your lower abdomen, but he made no move to hasten things along. 

“Come now, let us wash the day off of you,” you said softly, pulling away to guide him into the water.

You waited by the edge for him to submerge himself first, watching the way his muscles worked as he walked. He had the grace of a warrior, as if poised for attack at any moment. You almost shudder at his deep groan of contentment, leaning back against the edge. Sliding closer, you massaged his broad shoulders to try and relieve some of his tension. His hand found your calf, caressing it. 

He closed his eyes and let himself be pampered, your touch transporting him far away, beyond even the shores of Ostia. He thought of your luminous eyes, the honeyed taste of your lips, and the smell of rose oil on your skin… What lovely comfort you offered. He wanted more of you and he suspected he would still not have enough.

If winning meant earning moments like this, with you, then he would never let himself be defeated in the arena. Or elsewhere, for that matter.

“My very own Venus Pompeiana,” he said softly, turning around so he could slot his body between your legs and face you. “The Gods seem to be favoring me greatly today.”

You cupped his face tenderly. “Something tells me they will continue to do so, too.”

He grinned, eyes heavy-lidded as they dropped to your lips. “Tell me, did you emerge from the seafoam, too?”

You laughed, delighted at his words. “Yes, I am salt, and brine, and pearls made flesh.”

His strong arms enveloped you, pulling you into the water with him. His lips found yours again and your legs wrapped around his hips, anchoring yourself to him. He submerged both of you for a moment and you chuckled against his lips when you resurfaced.

He kissed you like he might never be able to do so again — like a desperate lover forced to say goodbye before sailing off to war. Your fingers threaded through his damp curls, his beard tickling the lower half of your face. Your head swam and you wished you could spend an eternity there, in that moment.

You let his hands wander a little, getting bolder by the minute, but then you pulled away and playfully swam away from him. A safe distance away, you splashed some water at him, inciting him to give chase. 

He swam after you unhurriedly, his head low in the water so that you mostly saw his eyes. You could tell he was smiling from the way they creased at the corners, and you felt a thrill low in your spine as he drew closer. It reminded you of a crocodile pursuing its prey, biding its time before the right moment came along. 

A nervous giggle escaped you as you backed away, even daring to splash more water in his direction. He slipped under the water and for a delirious moment of uncertainty, you thought your heart might leap out of your chest. You searched for any sign of him, but the water was cloudy and concealed him well.

Suddenly, you felt the graze of teeth on your hip and you cried out, startled. Lucius re-emerged, shaking water from his hair and cornering you against the edge of the pool.

“Got you now,” he rasped, pressing you against him and bending to kiss your throat.

“Mercy,” you gasped, smiling wide as you amiably submitted to his attention. “Oh, please have mercy.”

He lifted your hips further so that his cock rested against your folds. You tried to move against him as best as the angle would allow and he helped guide you with one hand on your hip. 

“Mercy?” he said against your jaw, the deep timbre of his voice like music to your ears. “You see how you’ve got me? I’ve not had any mercy from you.”

You grinned slyly. “You thought I’d yield so easily?”

He hummed, pretending to think about it. “Never crossed my mind.”

“Actually, you make it very hard not to, as much as I like to play,” you conceded, biting your lip.

He chuckled, sucking in a breath through his teeth as he fought the urge to slip inside you and claim you for himself. But not yet, of course, as he wanted to play with you a little while longer too. 

“Shall we put you to the test?”

He lifted you out of the water and sat you back on the edge. With one broad palm on your sternum, he gently pushed you backward. Instinctively, your legs hiked up, but you let him be the one to spread them.

He let out a low groan at the sight, his gaze incandescent as it met yours. He kissed your calf, then the inside of your knee, and steadily progressed up your inner thigh as he propped himself half out of the water.

Your hips shifted as he got close to his target, but then he moved to your other leg, repeating the same torturously slow process. You propped up on your elbows to give him a slightly annoyed look and he grinned cheekily.

“How’s that for mercy?” He asked, but before you could respond, his head dipped and his tongue finally found where you were aching.

A breathy Oh escaped you as your back arched, fingers digging into his curls once more. He was just as skilled with his mouth as with a blade, easily finding the tenderest, most sensitive spots. He had you squirming on the tiled floors, the tip of his tongue tracing circular patterns on your clit.

“Gods,” he moaned, the taste of you only making him hungrier and greedier for more.

You tried to grind against his face, chasing the waves of pleasure that already crested over you. His beard added just enough friction to create another layer of stimulation, and soon enough, your eyes were searching for constellations at the back of your skull.

“Lucius, oh, Lucius,” you panted. “You’re gonna make me– Ah!”

He felt triumphant at your trembling under him, more honey flowing from you and onto his tongue. You made soft, almost pleading sounds, holding onto his head as if to anchor yourself. He groaned, prolonging your pleasure for as long as you both could stand it. His blood felt near boiling and yet the only cure for it was you. 

Ravenous and near feral, he pulled himself out of the water and crawled over you. Finally – mercifully – he slid into you with ease, going slow and deep at first so you could adjust to him. He watched your reactions closely, feeling himself twitch inside of you — so warm and soft and perfect for him.

But that wasn't the only way he wanted to have you, and every time either of you grew closer to the edge, he changed positions. His stamina was astounding, especially considering he had been fighting for his life only a few hours earlier.

It wasn’t until you were on top of him, his hands aiding the gyrations of your hips, that you could get revenge for all his teasing. You set the pace, finding an angle where you could grind your clit against his pelvis with each move. His eyes roamed over you reverently, like you were the true goddess of love, and he was your subject worshipping at your temple. Sweat slick skin, the bounce of your breasts, your bared throat as you tilted your head backward in ecstasy… He found divinity in all of this.

His self-composure began to dissolve as his grip on you tightened. His brows furrowed and his mouth was slack, his moans spilling out wantonly. He was beautiful, so truly beautiful.

“Don’t stop,” he groaned, his hips positioning upwards to meet your movements. 

As you happily complied, leaning forward to kiss him, he lifted his torso to meet you halfway. He cupped the back of your head as his body tensed, spilling his seed inside you hotly. You came harder than before, your cunt squeezing him tightly in time with the twitching of his cock. 

Spent, you collapsed on his chest, the two of you sharing a laugh, high on endorphins. He wiped a stray strand of hair from your forehead with even more tenderness than you thought you’d ever experienced. He felt like the most fortunate man in the world, having found something so good in a place as hostile as Rome. He wouldn’t let you go so easily. 

“Come to the next games,” he said softly before he could really think about it.

You hesitated. As much as you’d love to see him in action, you didn’t think you could bear to see him get hurt… Or worse. 

“You want me to watch you fight?” You asked, trying to keep the fear away from your expression. 

“I want you to see me win,” he said without a shred of doubt. “That way, you can be sure that no man can stop me from claiming my reward right after.”

You shuddered, biting down a giddy grin. “I’ll be there for you to find me, my champion.”

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[ddejavvu]

Spring Fling - Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x Reader (Part Five) (18+) / Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four

Summary: You should have known the ‘no refunds’ detail on the website for Spring Fling was a red flag. But you paid no mind to it, eager to be assigned a quick fuck for spring break. When the man that walks through your cabin door is none other than Jake 'Hangman' Seresin, your wildly infuriating fellow pilot, you have two choices: bicker the entire time and have a miserable spring break, or fuck.

Contents/Warnings: smut, minors dni. fem!reader, pilot!reader, enemies/rivals to lovers, lots and lots of arguing, could these two people be any less cooperative, sex seven ways to sunday and then some, seriously like so much smut it'll make your eyes bleed, makeouts, rough sex, oral (m+f receiving), penetrative sex, will add as i post

WC: 7.0k / navigation / inbox

A/N: Thank you all for waiting for this chapter! I know it took me longer to finish this one than it did the others but it's the longest chapter so far, and I also had a lot of major life events go down in the time between this chapter and last. I appreciate each and every single one of you who stayed patient with me, and I hope that this chapter and that the rest to come are worth the wait :) <3

feedback is greatly appreciated! comment, reblog, talk in the tags, send me a message, tell me what you think!

You’re doing a terrible job at paying attention to where you’re going as you take the elevator, jamming your finger against the 12 button so hard it hurts. Pizza is on the twelfth floor, and you’re hoping Daniel will be there early like you so that you can forget about Jake and his tyrannical rule. 

It’s clear as day to you; Jake thinks he has control over you just the same way he has control over the girls that drool over him at the Hard Deck. He thinks one glance will melt your brain into mush, but it won’t. It doesn’t, and you’re not letting the cockiest man you know believe he’s won you over. Especially one that you work with. If anyone found out- if any of your fellow aviators knew that you’d succumbed to Jake’s charms… you’d risk losing the respect you’ve fought hard to earn on the tarmac. You’re not letting your career take a nosedive because Jake won’t stop bragging about getting his dick wet. He doesn’t get a say in your life if he has nothing genuine to contribute to it. You know him well enough to know that caving in and fucking would be the worst decision of your life, and you refuse to let him feel like he’s won you like a prize. You’re standing up for yourself; if he can shit-talk Daniel, you can shit-talk Miss Melons.

Your skin prickles with annoyance the more you think about the woman that had approached you both- seriously, did she not consider that she was being intrusive and rude? You assume Jake has snagged her away from her roommate by now, and they’re probably having a better time than you are. 

Everything feels unfair, down to the coincidental roommate placement. It’s like the universe had heard you needed a break, and wanted to punish you for it.

Cracking open your book helps, but it takes you a while to get into the groove. You’re sitting poolside across from the pizza place, eyes glancing from page to parlor every once in a while to check for a certain bearded man. The main lead is compelling, and your stomach soars as you imagine Daniel in a cowboy hat. You’d save that horse.

Peace is hard to find while sitting poolside on a cruise, but chaos is actually the perfect white noise for you to read, and your concentration isn’t broken until a shadow falls over your lounge chair. You glance up, but it’s not the man you’d wanted to see.

“Hey.” Jake’s already frowning, his face apprehensive like he thinks you’ll scream at him to get away. You want to, but you don’t want to cause a scene.

“What, Hangman?”

“I’m not trying to control you.” He pushes despite seeing your gaze back on your book, “I just don’t think you’re meant to be with Daniel. But I shouldn’t have given you a hassle for doing the same thing to me. I just… I do it because-”

He stops short, glancing sideways at a man running despite the clear no running sign on the lifeguard tower. You decide to help him in his moment of need.

“Because you’re used to women who let you walk all over them. Even if you’re not trying to control me, you’re used to having that control. It’s familiar for you, so you expect it, even if you don’t know you’re doing it. But I’m not like that. You can’t keep me waiting on you.”

The scoff he lets out is accompanied by an expression that looks truly pained, “That ain’t it at all. But forget it. Don’t worry about why I do it. I just thought maybe you were doin’ it to me for the same reasons. But never mind. I’ll shut up about Daniel. Truce?”

You glare up at him, book still open in your lap. He extends an uncharacteristically helping hand, and you wait a truly uncomfortable amount of time before taking it and shaking once.

“Truce.”

He takes the chair beside you, stretched out in the sun. Unfortunately, it seems like your reading time is over as his head turns to you, “So, Dudley showed up yet?”

“He’s coming for lunch.” You cling to your novel, trying desperately to ignore Jake and his instantly broken promise, “What about Melon girl, they weren’t ripe enough for you?”

“She wasn’t my type.” He starts, and there’s a heavy silence before he continues, “I don’t like a woman who thinks it’s fun to get between a couple.”

The sideways glance you send Hangman, the ‘I-told-you-so’ smirk, is lethal.

“Anyways.” He continues, tone more casual now, “Fancy a swim, darlin’?”

“I’ll read instead,” You offer, “But you have fun, Hangman.”

“Party Pooper,” He accuses, standing from the lounge chair he’s occupying and stretching briefly, “You’re an absolute mood-killer. No fun, the most boring person on this boat.”

“I’m about to be more of one: have you put sunscreen on?”

“Nope,” He grins, “You volunteering to do the honors, you sleazy thing?”

“Absolutely not. But you can use the stuff in my bag.” You nod at your tote bag, “Don’t use it all, though.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Jake nods, folding into a seat on the edge of the lounge chair beside yours, “So, what’s going on in that book, they boning yet?”

“Mhm.” You nod absently as Jake begins smearing sunscreen over his arms and legs, “Real sexy stuff.”

“I’ve got somethin’ sexier for you.”

“It’s a porn book, Hangman,” You clarify, in case he’s forgotten, “I’m trying to read porn. Leave me alone.”

“There’s porn right here!” He calls, arms out to show off his impressively tanned and toned chest, a thick layer of sunscreen giving it a sheen that glistens in the light. As reluctant as you are to admire anything about Jake, you can’t lie; he has a body worth ogling. But you will not ogle it.

“This porn’s better,” You hum, glancing up at Jake through your lashes, deceptively inviting, “This guy’s got a cowboy hat on.”

“I’ve got a million and one cowboy hats,” Jake insists, slowly inching towards you and away from the edge of the pool, “Is that really all it takes, darlin’? ‘Cause I can slap one on in seconds, if that’s what you’re after. ‘Even brought one with me in case my roommate was into it.”

“Mm, maybe,” You let him get closer, excitement clearly swirling in his eyes as he advances towards your chair. He doesn’t notice the shifting of your feet until it’s too late and one is shoving firmly against his chest, knocking him off balance and sending him tumbling backwards into the pool.

There’s not anyone in his immediate vicinity besides you, so you take the brunt of the splash, but it’s worth it.

“But I like it better when the hat’s on a real gentleman!” You call, laughter interrupting your words as Jake emerges from the pool well and truly soaked, shaking water out of his hair. He’s been thoroughly underwater trained, so he’d been able to catch his breath in time despite the surprise of it all, and there’s no real harm done besides the initial splash.

“You dirty rotten minx,” He calls, water dripping from his short hair into his eyes, “You lured me in with the promise of cowboy hat sex just to push me in the pool?”

“I can’t believe you fell for it!” You’re still laughing, but maybe this bout of giggles is only to annoy him, “That’s, like, the oldest trick in the book. Well, maybe besides the cowboy hat sex thing. But you shouldn’t have gotten so close!”

He braces his elbows on the wall of the pool, the border surely burning his skin. But he stares at you regardless, “I thought you were finally givin’ in.”

“It’d take a lot more than a cowboy hat to make me give in, Jake.” You laugh, turning back to your book, “Like, a full personality transplant.”

Jake hears Danica’s words repeated back to him in his head, ‘Show, don’t tell’.

“Noted. I’ll look into one’uh those,” He quips, smile sarcastic and empty as he resorts to swimming alone, “Hey, when you’re done with that chapter, you should join me.”

“No.”

“Alright.”

You glance away from the book’s pages at Hangman’s unusual, immediate acceptance of your refusal. But he lifts himself out of the water- no stairs, no ladder, only his forearms against the deck, and your stomach sinks as you realize he might be playing a game of wills with you.

Instead, he sits beside you again, this time facing away from you, “Will you rub some sunscreen on my back?”

You want to say no. You would, if he were only asking to feel your hands on him. And maybe that’s part of it, but you also know that as much as he tans, he could burn, and his back is the only part of himself that he can’t reach. You’d want someone to do you the solid too, so you sigh and set your book aside.

“Fine. But you owe me.”

“Mhm.” He nods, passing you the sunscreen, “I’ll rub it wherever you want, Y/N.”

You whack him upside the head with the bottle, and when he hisses in pain and pitches forwards, you squirt some of the lotion onto your palm and begin applying it to the broad, tanned, muscled expanse of his back.

You’re no masseuse, but apparently you’re rubbing all the right places, because Jake lets out grunts and groans that are borderline pornographic. If they were coming from anyone else, you might have squirmed in your seat, but each one sends your eyes rolling skywards as you cover Jake’s skin in goopy sun lotion.

“Damn, you’re good.” Jake grunts as you dig into a knot beneath his shoulder blade, “Do that again?”

“I’m putting sunscreen on you, Jake, not working out muscle tension.”

“Oh, come on, just a little more?” He pleads, turning so that he can glance at you from the side of his gaze, eyes shining in prayer.

You dig extra hard into his muscle, and you take some sort of wicked pleasure in the way that his resulting groan is more of a pained yelp than something of enjoyment. 

“There, Hangman.” You whack the middle of his back, between his shoulder blades, “You’re all oiled up.”

“Aren’t you glad you were the one to get to do it?” Jake grins blindingly, and you bury your nose in your book again to avoid answering his question.

“Oh, you can stick your face in that book all you want,” Jake drawls, and you hear the displacement of the water he steps in as he lowers himself into the pool, gracefully and by choice this time, “But I know you liked having your hands all over me, darlin’.”

You want to gripe something back- something witty and cutting that will tear him down where he stands, but he’s turned away from you, already submerging himself to begin swimming laps. You admire his dedication to exercise even while on vacation- you have no plans to visit the gym in the lower decks.

Jake sees the diving board just as you do, and you keep him in your peripheral vision as he climbs out of the pool to make his way up the ladder. Your novel is begging to be read, but your eyes stick firm on one fitting word- ‘abdomen’ so that you can watch Jake from the corner of your eye as he prepares to dive.

Fortunately, you don’t need to continue the ruse of reading because Jake bellows from across the deck, “Y/N, look!”

You’re met with a grin when you look up at him, his arms raised above his head and joined flush together in diving position, “I’m gonna dive- watch me.”

“I’m watching.” You call, injecting your voice with as much disinterest as you can manage without feeling guilty, “This feels like babysitting, Hangman.”

He dives instead of quipping back, and it’s an impressive one, not that you’ll sing his praises for it. He comes up on the side of the pool closest to you, arms flinging an arc of water onto the concrete before you.

“Was it good?” He asks, panting slightly, hanging onto the wall.

“Yes,” You reply, a sickly sweet smile on your face as you condescend to him, “You did so good, honey.”

“Shut up,” He sends a wave of water splashing over your sandals, and you can’t be mad at him after all the teasing you’ve been inflicting upon him.

“I’ve been workin’ on my diving,” He goes back to swimming around, this time more casual as he keeps his head above the water to speak with you, “My nieces back home are learnin’ to swim so I’ve been in the pool a lot lately. Anytime they drag me in there I dive in and splash them.”

His arms cut through the water with strength and ease, confident strokes as you mull over his words. The image of Jake urging a toddler in floaties to cross a 3-foot gap into his arms is- endearing, not that you’ll admit it. You hum in acknowledgement, and tuck back into your book.

There’s not many people in the pool this early- most are probably still in bed with a hangover and a mess to clean up - and it’s large to boot, so there’s plenty of room. Your eyes drift left and catch sight of a jacuzzi, and suddenly your beach chair seems to pale in comparison.

Okay, you won’t join Jake in the pool, but you’ll relax for a couple of minutes in the jacuzzi. Just until Daniel gets here.

Jake doesn’t notice that you’ve stood until your chair is empty, and you have a perfect view of him floundering, scanning the entire deck until he spots you half-submerged in the hot tub.

You get to laugh at him again, and he grants you a good-natured grin instead of getting annoyed.

“I thought you’d finally found what’s-his-name,” Jake swims over to the separation wall that keeps the hot water parted from the cold, “Mind if I join you, Y/N?”

“Only if you’re- careful!” You shriek, trying desperately to protect the pages of your book from his sopping wet skin as he scales the barrier, “Hangman, if this book gets wet, you’re replacing it for me.”

“Alright, alright! I’ll take you on a shopping spree, relax. Hey, if I’m buyin’ you porn books, doesn’t that make me somethin’ like a sugar daddy?”

“You’re not getting any sugar,” You shrug, “But sure.”

“Just call me daddy, Y/N.” He grins, “That’s all the sugar I need.”

You hide behind your book so that he can’t see the way your face wrinkles into a grimace. The heat from the jacuzzi spreads inexplicably quick all of a sudden, warming your neck, your ears, your face, and Jake lets out a thick, heavy groan as he settles into the warm water.

“This is nice.” He muses, eyes closed, “Real relaxing.”

“It’s less relaxing when someone’s talking the whole time,” You peek across the side of your book, “Shut up, maybe?”

Jake snorts, leaning his head back against the edge of the pool, “Alright, alright your majesty. I’ll stay silent.”

You don’t verbally thank him, but you don’t make a scene when his leg drifts across the jet currents of the jacuzzi to brush against yours.

You cover a good chunk of your novel before a voice calls your name, and this time it’s the two people you’d been hoping to see all morning. Danica waves giddily at you and Jake, who’s picked his head up from where you thought he’d fallen asleep and is already mad-dogging Daniel. You wave back to Danica, and cast a quick glance down at your bathing suit before standing to greet Daniel. It’s just as tight and showy as you prefer it to be. 

You pay no attention to Jake where he gets out behind you, too focused on Daniel to care. But perhaps you should have, because you’re two steps from meeting Daniel in the middle when Jake’s strong arm shoves you sideways, and your book is wrenched from your grasp as you fall sideways into the pool.

It’s cold, colder even because you’d been soaking in the hot tub. You’re surprised, but you suppose you can’t even really be mad at him considering it’s just payback for what he’d done to you.

You’ve barely righted yourself in the water before there’s another splash beside you, and when you finally emerge there’s hands reaching for your waist, Daniel’s as you realize he’d jumped in to help you. 

“You-!” You splutter at Jake with bleary, chlorine-soaked eyes, attention split between Daniel who’s trying to ensure you’re alright, and Jake who’s snickering while holding your book in his thankfully dry hand.

“You asshole.” Daniel finishes for you, “She could have drowned!”

“I know how to swim,” You brace a hand on Daniel’s chest- startlingly bare, but riddled with coarse, brown hair, “It’s fine, I- I pushed him in earlier.”

“Relax, Prince Charming. It’s just a bit of payback. And look,” Jake waves your novel in front of you, “Dry as a bone.”

“Well I am- uh, not.” You stand half-submerged in the pool, Daniel still holding onto your waist, “So, I guess I will go swimming.”

“Great. You can swim with us.” Daniel smiles, warm and inviting as he keeps his hands on you.

“Yeah, us.” Jake agrees, taking Danica’s towel and spreading it over a sunny lounge chair for her.

Jake helps lower Danica gently into the pool, holding her hand while she takes the stairs, before jumping in beside you so that you’re splashed by the wave he creates.

“You are an asshole,” You laugh, breaking away from Daniel’s grip to shove at Jake’s shoulder. The grins on your faces are bright and genuine, perhaps the first time you’ve both been able to laugh with each other the entire trip. It feels nice, and you don’t fight when he shoves back at you with strong arms.

“Hey- hey!” Danica shouts, standing behind Daniel with a hand on his shoulder, “Why don’t you turn that pushing and shoving into a game of chicken?”

“I’m down,” Daniel seems thrilled to be opposite Jake as he lowers himself for Danica to climb atop his shoulders, “Y/N, you okay on his shoulders?”

Jake does the honors himself, dunking himself under the water and coming up between your legs. You barely have time to plant your hands on the top of his head, fingers twisting instinctively into his hair as you accidentally tug it while he stands at his full height again.

“Shit, sorry Hangman.” You let go of his hair, hoping you hadn’t yanked too hard. He’s forgiven, for now, so you won’t resort to childish things like hair-pulling.

“That’s okay, darlin’.” He grins, craning his neck back to meet your eye, “I like it when you tug on my hair.”

You have to overlook Jake’s suggestive comment as Danica’s already reaching for you, and you eagerly engage in a shoving match while the two men beneath you plant themselves into the bottom of the pool. You manage to get a leg up on Danica, and they’re both pushed backwards by the force of your shove, but Daniel surges forwards and ends up knocking you and his roommate right into each other.

You collapse against Danica, forehead-to-forehead, giggling like little girls. Her eyes are bright and shining with amusement, and her breath smells minty- like gum, not toothpaste. You’re more than happy to begin pushing at each other again, and though you’re confident your navy-built muscles are going to prevail, she lands a critical shove against your shoulder that throws you off-balance and sends you toppling off of Jake’s shoulders.

The water is cold, colder than you remember as you splash into it, and when you come up for air, already laughing, Jake’s facing you, having turned when you’d fallen from his shoulders. He’s grinning too, a hand already outstretched to help you up, but upon seeing you stand his eyes widen and his face drops.

“Shit.” He lunges for you, cutting through the water as his arm wraps around your back to yank you tight against his chest. You protest, grunting with exertion as you try fighting against his grip. But his muscles are impressive, and you’re trapped against his chest despite your best efforts.

“Would you cut it out? I’m trying to help you. Your top came untied.”

“What?” You splutter, water trailing down your face as you quell your instinctive struggle against his crushing hold. You realize that the reason for the extreme cold had, in fact, been because your bikini top had abandoned ship, and you barely have time to process the feeling of your bare tits slammed up against Jake’s hard, toned chest before he’s fishing the bathing suit out of the water and feeding it around your waist.

“Up,” He instructs, lifting his eyes to the expansive blue sky above you so that you can separate yourself from his chest for long enough to cover your own again. It’s- a strange gesture of courtesy that you would have expected from Daniel, sure, but not Jake. Perhaps that’s why you’re so sluggish, why it takes you longer than expected to fit your top back over your tits and grapple with the strings.

“You decent?” Jake asks, and when you grunt in confirmation he drops his eyes again. He notices you struggling with the ties and reaches for them himself, gently swatting your fingers away as he uses his advantage of sight. It presses his muscular shoulder up against your face, and you turn so that your cheek rests against it instead of your nose. Suddenly you’re held against his chest like a slow dance, and something terribly and inexplicably squirmy happens in your stomach.

“Done. I double knotted it.” He hums, and it’s such a sincere tone, one that’s completely vacant of all his usual dickishness, that you lose yourself staring at his face when he pulls away. You begin examining it for any sign that perhaps he was murdered and replaced with a poorly-trained doppelganger.

His hair looks right, albeit sopping wet. His eyebrows are growing slightly bushier than usual, but nothing you’d consider a complete and total imposter. His nose is still the same: strong, slightly downturned (though not as far as Rooster’s), and there’s a tiny patch of sunscreen that hasn’t been rubbed in near his right eye. His mouth is set in a determined purse as he double knots the strings of your bikini top together, and his eyes- his eyes are different.

Miles different than you’ve ever seen them. The outside edge of his hazel-green rings is softened, like someone has blurred their usual sharp border and lined it with suede. His pupils are huge, and they’d be eclipsing his irises if those weren’t so big and puppy-like. He is, in every sense of the word, gentle, inside and out. 

Jake has never been gentle before. 

“You alright?” He asks, and you snap back to reality with his large hands spread over the expanse of your bare back, the eyes that you’d been examining firmly and concernedly fixed upon you. Only a few meager strings separate his skin from yours, and you nod once, steadily as you gently push his arms off of you.

“Let’s go again,” You call to Danica and Daniel, your voice a piss-poor attempt at strength and nonchalance as it lacks its usual life, “Good hit, Danica. But watch out, I’m gonna kick your ass.”

“Bring it,” She grins gleefully, and her giddy gaze drifts downwards to Jake’s face when he lifts you onto his shoulders yet again. From the looks of it they share some sort of silent conversation- some inside joke that you’re not privy to. 

Something about that, something about her excluding you from a conversation with your own teammate makes you shove her, not enough to knock her off of Daniel’s shoulders, but enough to show her that you’re not going easy on her. She shrieks giddily as she writhes to stay balanced on Daniel’s shoulders, a smidge less broad than Jake’s. You’re thankful for that, for the steady mount you’ve got, as you resume pushing and shoving at Danica.

Jake is going insane. Not only does the phantom sensation of your bare tits- nipples hard from the chilly pool water - stick to him like a wet t-shirt, he can feel you against the back of his neck, your warm sex nestled snugly against him with only the bottom half of your bikini to separate you. Your thighs bracket his head, close enough for him to reach out and bite at, but he has to focus on keeping his stance sturdy so that you can play properly. Daniel’s glaring viciously at him across the few feet that separates the four of you, and he’s not going to let Mr. Mailman win. 

This time, Jake suspects you’ve used that military muscle of yours, because Danica slips backwards off of Daniel’s dewy shoulders and splashes into the pool. Your hand cups beneath Jake’s chin, tilting his head upwards and leaning it back into your lap.

“Nice one,” He grins upside-down at you, and you bump your fist against his when he offers it. Then you’re craning your neck down, surely uncomfortable as you leave mere inches between your lips and his, and his ears are ringing.

“Back up,” You murmur, disguising it as a congratulatory speech while Daniel helps Danica back onto his shoulders, “Get them to chase us and we’ll use the momentum against them.”

“Darlin’,” Jake proclaims, pride puffing up his chest that your legs are resting against, “You’re my kinda woman. Always looking to win.”

“Just do it, Hangman,” You scoff, but your eye-roll is less than irritated, fond if anything due to your partnership as Jake drops his head to face Daniel and Danica once more.

Jake stands in place where he’d been before, but when Danica engages with you he begins backing up. Slowly, carefully, ensuring that his feet are planted steadily each step so that you’re not tipped over, he makes his way towards the drop off towards the deeper end of the water. Daniel follows, taking the bait, and soon enough his predicament becomes obvious: he’s not as tall as Jake.

He stands somewhere close to six feet, surely, but not past it like Jake does. Your partner’s head is still comfortably above water, smirk in full force as Daniel’s beard becomes waterlogged. 

“That’s not fair!” Danica laughs, petting sympathetically at Daniel’s sopping wet hair, “Poor guy, we’ll get you stilts for the next round.”

Daniel lands a teasing pinch against the curve of her ass and she shrieks. You lunge for her, using her momentary shock to catch her off guard as you send her tumbling backwards into the water behind Daniel. 

You don’t have time to celebrate before Jake is ducking down and slipping himself out from beneath you, his strong arms bracing your fall so that you barely sink a few feet into the water. He crushes you in a celebratory hug, his laughter harmonizing with your own. He turns you both to face Daniel and Danica as they splutter to catch their breath, his cheek pressed flush against your own. 

“Chicken Champions,” He declares, holding you tight to his side at his own height, which means your feet float above his own in the water, “I’d offer to go again, but that’d just be cruel. You ladies wanna chatter in the hot tub while Danny-Boy and I show off on the diving board?”

“I brought a book,” Danica hums, face dripping with water you feel only mildly guilty for submerging her in, “If you wanna read, Y/N, I’ll do it with you.”

“Perfect.” Daniel nods, already cutting through the water on his way to the diving board, “I’ll be careful not to splash you guys.”

“I won’t.” Jake supplies helpfully, his grin turned shit-eating as he eyes you up, “No point in reading one of them smutty porn books if you’re not soaking wet.”

“Splash me and I’ll throw your room key off the side of the boat, Hangman,” You promise, “You’ll be begging strangers to take pity on you in the elevator.”

“Nah, that’s not my style,” Jake’s voice is dripping with intent while Daniel takes position on the diving board, his swim trunks dripping steady trails of water. You don’t know why until he continues, taking his own bait, “I’ll leave that to Daniel.”

You blame Jake’s comment for why Daniel’s dive nearly turns into a belly flop. It’s instantaneous, really, Daniel’s changing of posture as he register’s Jake’s biting words, and you have half a mind to admonish Jake for riling Daniel up during a dive- that could have ended badly. As it stands, Daniel does a sort of cannonball, though not intentionally, and you and Danica cringe in unison when he lands, sending water splashing well over the divider into the hot tub. Your book remains mostly unscathed- only a droplet of water lands on the cover and obscures the male lead’s face, blurring out his beard and making him appear clean-shaven. 

Jake is already scaling the ladder, and when he gets to the top he surveys Daniel emerging from the water.

“Six,” He shrugs, sneering down at Daniel from the highest point on the deck, “‘Could’ve clinched a seven if you hadn’t splashed the ladies, but your form was still shit.”

He doesn’t give Daniel a chance to fire back- or maybe the man is just too smart to take Jake’s bait - before he sets his arms together above his head, and seamlessly, impeccably cuts through the water. For someone so muscular and bulky, his form is graceful- not that you’ll ever tell him that. Water arcs outwards from where he’d landed, one half of the splash practically targeting Daniel where he stands watching.

He swims farther, nearly reaching the other end of the pool before he emerges, shaking water from his hair like a dog as he looks intently at you and Danica in the hot tub for a rating.

“Ten!” Your reading companion shouts, blessedly unaware of the tense atmosphere- or again, too intelligent to fall for Jake’s lowly antics- and you look at the water-stained cover of your novel.

You smear away the water droplet with your dry thumb, and the male main character’s beard returns.

“Four.” You call, voice deadpan as you lock your eyes on your novel, “For playing dirty and sabotaging the other contestants.”

Hangman’s grin is open-mouthed and cemented into place as he stands taller than Daniel in the water, tanned skin standing starkly out from the blue of the chlorinated water, “Dirty’s the best way to play, darlin’.”

Danica shoots you a look from behind the spread of her novel that you’ve sent many-a-girlfriend before. It’s the wide-eyed, restrained smile that screams ‘We’re talking about this later’, and you mirror her expression with your own disdain.

“Leave us alone,” You call, grinning apologetically at Daniel so that he knows he’s only a bystander, “We want to read.”

“Let’s leave the ladies to their smut, Dorian.” Jake calls, louder than he needs to be as he stretches to display his toned abdomen and muscled arms, “We can find our own fun. Wanna see who can swim the fastest? Place your bets, ladies: pilot or mailman?”

“You swam pretty slow when you crash-landed in the Pacific that one time,” You muse, fighting to keep a smirk off of your face, “I remember thinking you would die in the time it took for you to swim back to shore.”

“Wouldn’t’ve gone so slow if I wasn’t hauling my RIO back to shore. He hit his head on the way down,” Jake dips his head towards Danica, happily regaling her with the tale,  and you realize you’ve only fluffed his ego more, “So he was unconscious. Well I couldn’t just leave him there, ‘poor guy was only a trainee. So I took him along. It did slow me down, but,” He heaves a disgusting, gaudy, fake sigh, “It was worth it to send him back home to his mama.”

You taste a hint of blood where you’ve apparently chewed through your lip. You let it go and hope nothing escapes your mouth. It would be a shame to stain the pages of your novel red.

You’re trying very hard not to pay attention to Jake and Danica where he’s engaged her in a staring contest. Well, you suppose it’s not much of a contest that she can win: the point is that you’re losing. Jake’s showing off his impressive build, still running his mouth with every vaguely self-complementary anecdote he can embellish, and Danica is taking the bait, which means that your rampant attempts to cool Jake’s ego have failed. 

You let the warm, borderline-hot water sink into your skin and simmer alongside the building irritation that threatens to blow beneath the surface. You’re tired. This was supposed to be a relaxing vacation for you- or, if not relaxing, a good way to blow off steam. You were supposed to be bent in half up against the shower wall by now, not bending the pages of your book with the strong grip you’ve cemented onto them while you mediate Jake’s ego and the willingness of so many women to accommodate it. 

Part of you wants to let loose and have fun- not with Jake, of course. Never with Jake. But part of you wants to act rationally, forget the constant rivalry between you two and let him shack up with whoever will show him her tits first. But the other part of you, the one that cheers every time he places second in a show of skill, wants to knock him down a peg. It’s why you’re so persistently humbling him- or, trying to, at least. Something about him putting on this cocky persona- erasing all human emotion to make way for pure sleaze puts you on edge, and you pity the fool who believes it.

You can’t tell if Danica’s that fool yet, because she’s turned back to her book with a smile, but to her credit she doesn’t ogle him while he’s swimming. It would be easy to- he’s all tanned muscle and gestures that show off just the right curve or vein. He knows how to preen, but Danica seems to be minding her own business. That makes it easier for you to read your own novel; you don’t feel like you have to keep an eye out for her anymore.

You’re not sure whether it’s a love for the act or a wordless competition to outswim the other that keeps Jake and Daniel occupied with lapping the pool for so long, but as more and more people filter out of their rooms and onto the deck, there’s not much room for recreation anymore.

“Are you done?” You ask Danica, peering over at her after someone unknowingly sends a wave of water straight for you both, narrowly avoiding soaking your novels.

“I think I’m done.” She nods sheepishly, rushing to stand and keep her book dry, “Should we run away before the men notice we’re leaving?”

“Excellent plan,” You laugh, but you can practically feel Jake’s eagle eye upon you as you race for your towel, leaving soaked footprints behind on the wooden deck, “We should go get some pizza. They’re making more now that it’s a little busier out here.”

“You shouldn’t stare like that.” Daniel’s irritatingly smooth voice, pitched up slightly from Jake’s and entirely free of Jake’s rugged charm, makes Jake’s lips yearn to curl into a sneer.

Jake pivots in the cold pool water to face Daniel rather unimpressed, a scoff begging to burst from his lips, “Like what?”

“Like she’s a piece of meat, or something.” Daniel’s arms are crossed, and Jake plants his feet firmly against the concrete floor of the pool.

“Oh, you’re so virtuous,” Jake drawls, his skin burning and not from the rays of sun hitting it directly, “You frenched her in an elevator, Daniel, you’ve got no room to be talking to me about class.”

“She wanted me to kiss her. She kissed me.” Daniel insists, and Jake laughs- actually laughs, a grit of his teeth and a forceful exhalation of air, “That’s different than staring at her ass while she runs away from you like you’d flip her skirt up at a drive-in movie theater.”

“Flipping skirts,” Jake laughs, sadistic grin in full force, “Daniel, I’m not that old fashioned! Please, she’s in a bathing suit that she chose, for a sex cruise that she booked, and you know what? She probably wants you to be staring at her ass in it. And you don’t seem too concerned with the other people on the deck, I’m sure a few of them are looking too. And are you worried I’m looking at Danica’s ass?”

“You’re not looking at Danica’s ass.” Daniel nearly bites his tongue in an effort to keep his voice level, “Because you’re not interested in Danica. You’re interested in Y/N and you can’t have her. She’s not yours.”

“She’s not yours, either.” Jake spits, and there’s a moment of silence where both men’s chests heave with barely-suppressed tension. Jake realizes that he’s admitted to Daniel that he has no real claim over you, but the other man doesn’t fight back against not having one of his own. But you are his, you are Jake’s, in the way you’d fallen asleep in his arms last night, in the look in your eyes when you’d stared into his own earlier, in the stain on his pajama pants.

You’d moaned his name- his name, not Daniel’s.

Someone knocks into Daniel from behind, backing right into him and nudging him slightly off balance.

“Oh!” The woman shrieks, “I’m sorry! I wasn’t paying attention.”

“It’s fine.” He offers her a tight smile, heading for the ladder, “Don’t worry about it.”

Jake hauls himself up out of the pool with nothing but his forearms, using his towel to dry his hair if only to show off the expanse of his chest to any who may be watching. He checks- you’re not.

“So,” Danica leans forwards into your space at the pizza counter, eyes meaningfully wide, “Tell me why he’s acting like this.”

“He always acts like this.” You scoff, and when she levels you with an unimpressed glare, you insist, “No, really! He’s just- everything is a competition to him, everything. I met his mom once, and she told me that he used to have races at the dinner table to see who could finish their food first. He kept making himself sick but as long as he’d beat his brothers he didn’t care. He always has to win, and right now, he’s competing for us.”

“No, he’s competing for you.” Danica corrects you, “Is he winning?”

“Hell no. He’s- he’s not really competing for me, not meaningfully. He just wants to say he ‘got me’, you know? That would be major bragging rights on the tarmac. But that’s exactly why I can’t give in- I can’t be known as the woman who slept with her fellow pilot! Then they wouldn’t see my achievements anymore, just my mistakes.”

“I get that.” She nods, “But how do you know he’s just gonna dump you?”

“I’ve watched him dump the whole of San Diego,” You scoff, “That’s what he does. He doesn’t do love, he’s the kind of guy who’s only ever interested in something quick and dirty.”

“Everyone does love.” Danica frowns, “Some people just start later in life than others. And I think he’s starting now. With you.”

“Love,” You laugh, and sure, it’s dramatic, but if it gets through to her, you don’t care, “A man who loves me would not have tormented me for my entire career.”

She tilts her head thoughtfully, “I think he does. Even if he doesn't act the way you think he should, even if he doesn't act the way you would, I think he does love you. I think he just loves differently. I think he's new to it. What has he done to torment you?”

You huff, grateful for the opportunity to vent, “He constantly tries one-upping me- again, he can’t lose. He just- he pokes and prods and teases me like we’re on the playground or something, and it’s non-stop. It’s not like he’s sweet most of the time and then there’s a few bouts of light teasing, it’s- it’s constant, and I can’t ever let my guard down, or I’ll lose.”

“So you’re fighting to win, too.” Her eyes narrow slightly, “Why?”

“Because. I can't be second-best, and I can’t be known as the woman who slept with her coworker. I’m not doing that.” You repeat.

“Oh," She laughs, "So you're both stubborn. You don't want to lose, either. But second-best is temporary, rankings come and go. And I understand your thing about not wanting to be known for sleeping with him, but even if you did sleep with him, the whole Navy doesn’t have to know.”

“They will, Hangman will brag. He always brags.”

“He won’t- not if he’s in love with you, not if you want him to keep it private.”

“He’s not in love with me-!”

“Four slices of Pepperoni, two cheese?” A large tray is placed between you and Danica at the counter you’re both leaning against, and it snaps the two of you out of your debate.

You turn to see one of the employees looking expectantly at you, and Danica stammers, “Uh, three cheese.”

“Sorry.” He smiles placatingly at her, scooping another slice onto the plate, “Three cheese.”

“Thank you.” You take the pepperoni pizza, leaving Danica to collect the cheese. You feel bad for walking away, even if you know she’s hot on your trail, but you feel frustratingly suffocated, like everyone is urging you to make the biggest mistake of your life and never considering why you simply can’t. She doesn’t know Jake, she hasn’t spent the last decade with him as he’s blown his way through tourist after tourist, bragging all the while. And he doesn’t understand what it would be like- even if he wasn’t looking to win, even if he did just want to try casual sex for fun, you’d never be able to escape that reputation. 

You feel like you’re going crazy, and you plop down between Jake and Daniel where they sit at opposite sides of a table, ready to stuff your face with pizza instead of dealing with any of it.

feedback is greatly appreciated! comment, reblog, talk in the tags, send me a message, tell me what you think!

[greenwitchfromthewoods]

a house in the middle of nowhere l Joel Miller

Summary: you and Joel went on patrol together, nothing went your way

Warnings:  angst, guns, switchblade, killing people, allusions to sexual abuse, blood

A/N: your feedback is very important to me and I thank you for all the reblogs, comments and likes. 🖤 sorry for all the mistakes

short stories from life. [masterlist]

# 1/2

"We should be reaching that building in a few minutes."

You nodded and didn't slow down when you heard Joel's footsteps behind you. The leaves crunched under your shoes and the air in the forest was pleasantly cool. It was as if you had done this before.

The flu that had been sweeping through Jackson for a few weeks now had also reached the people patrolling the area. Soon, Tommy had no choice but to ask you and Joel to start working together again. 

Despite his concerns, he was pleasantly surprised - you were a great team. That's why he recommended you check out one of the buildings, which was a bit further from your trail.

"Looks good." You said, stopping in front of a small house standing near the end of the forest.

"Yeah. Too good." Joel mumbled. "Do you remember that..."

"I remember." You interrupted him, because your thoughts immediately drifted to a certain house you had found on your way to Jackson. "I saved your ass that time." You smiled, noticing the grimace on Joel's face.

"Keep telling yourself that, darling." he mumbled, heading towards the entrance.

But this time it was safe. The house was small and it took you a few minutes to check all the rooms. Apart from a few canned goods, a few old blankets and a dead bat in the bedroom, everything seemed long forgotten.

"This will be a good base for further patrols." Joel noted as you spread your things in the living room with the intention of spending the night there. "Once we check the area and make sure everything is safe."

You sat down on the dusty couch. The feeling that all this seemed strangely familiar to you filled you since your first joint patrol with Joel.

He didn't press you, he wasn't pushy. The safe distance you wanted to maintain was perceived by him, although you felt his gaze on you many times. You weren't without blame either. Your eyes often lingered on his broad shoulders for a few seconds longer than necessary. You missed him.

"We'll eat something and you can lie down." Joel announced, pulling sandwiches out of his backpack. "I'll take the first watch."

"There's water in the bathroom. Cold, but it's there." You noticed, doing the same as he did.

"Maybe the house is connected to a well. It's hard to tell right now." You handed him a cup of coffee. "Are you going to the party on Saturday?"

You looked at Joel, surprised. "Since when are you interested in parties in Jackson?"

He shrugged and chewed a bite of sandwich. "Ellie asked."

"Oh, did she say anything else?"

"That this new guy, Walsh, asked her about you."

Warmth crept up the back of your neck and you hoped Joel didn't notice your confusion. You weren't dating anyone, you didn't want to. But you knew what Miller was talking about. You and Walsh had been on a few patrols together, and you'd been seen together in the city too.

"Your coffee's getting cold, Joel." you replied, cutting off the discussion.

The room was filled with Joel's quiet snoring. You had been sitting by the window for almost two hours, observing the area. The first rays of sunlight were breaking through the treetops, and you only noticed a few squirrels and a hare.

Your spine was slowly starting to hurt, so you got up quietly and, trying not to wake Joel, you went to the door. Maybe you should have let him know you were leaving, but you saw how much he needed sleep. The lack of people meant that you were almost always outside Jackson, so that those who had families could rest or recover.

You quietly closed the door behind you and inhaled the fresh air. With your finger still near the trigger, you moved forward. The area was quiet, the fog was rising here and there between the trees, and even the birds were just waking up from their sleep.

An unexpected rustling behind you gave you goosebumps. You turned around sharply and saw a pair of rabbits disappearing behind the bushes.

"You scared me." You mumbled to yourself smiling "Don't do that again."

Then you heard a completely unfamiliar voice "I promise I won't do that again, doll."

You turned around sharply and saw the man behind you, then you felt something hit you and darkness engulfed you.

Something was tugging at you. You felt your wrists being tied. Some pushy hands searched all over you, and then someone patted your cheek.

"Doll, wake up!" the same voice, unfamiliar to you "Mike, you hit her too hard."

More steps and someone crouched down next to you. He brushed your hair away from your face.

"Such a pretty face, and look what you did." the first voice hissed "I hope you didn't break her nose."

"Do you need her nose for something?" Mike sneered and patted you on the cheek a few times "Hey! Get up!"

You moaned quietly and opened your eyelids. You almost immediately wanted to back away, but there was a tree behind you, and two men in front of you, who were staring at you with interest.

"Morning, doll." one of them greeted you with a smile "I'm Patrick, and you?"

You pressed your hands together violently, trying to get as far away from them as you could. It was impossible, you knew that. 

Fuck! How could you be so careless? You had been with someone last time, but now... 

You thought about the sleeping Joel. Maybe you had at least managed to get far enough away from the house that they wouldn't find him so quickly. Hopefully.

"Hey, bitch!" Mike nudged you in the shoulder, and your gaze immediately went to him. "Can you talk? I didn't knock your teeth out, did I?" he cackled as if he had told a good joke.

"No." You replied quietly.

"Good start." Patrick nodded, his eyes lazily moving over your face. There was something strange about him, something slippery and indecent. "Will you tell us what you're doing here, doll?"

"I was walking."

"You were walking." Patrick repeated after you, reaching out and pulling a blade of grass from your hair, there was something in his gesture that gave you shivers "Pretty girls like you shouldn't walk alone. Is anyone with you?" 

You shook your head and Mike immediately spat in the grass.

 “She's lying!” he growled, standing up. “I'm sure someone's nearby.”

Patrick frowned. 'Come on, I'll help you.' He grabbed you by the arm and pulled you to your feet, then pinned you against a tree. 'Who's with you?' he hissed. 

'I'm alone.' you repeated. 

'Wrong answer.'

You flinched nervously as a knife blade flashed before your eyes. It was the same switchblade that Joel had given you. You carried it with you, they had to find it when they searched you. 

“Listen to me carefully, doll.' Patrick moved the blade to your chest and soon you saw the first button on your shirt pop off, then the second. 'You'll tell us what we want, okay? Be a good girl. Maybe then I'll be gentle with you, huh? I wouldn't want to hurt you...' he made a sad face as if he was really sorry, two more buttons popped off. 'But I haven't had a warm pussy in a while, I might be too hard for you. Unless you like that? Do you like it, doll?"

"I'm alone." You managed to choke out, trying to keep your voice from shaking. "I swear. I... I got away from the group."

"That bitch is lying, I can feel it!" Mike growled, looking around the area. "Do what you have to and let's get out of here."

Patrick watched you closely. His gaze slid down to your chest, which was rising rapidly with every breath. Your bra peeked out from under your shirt, the outline of your breasts must have been clearly visible to him.

"You could have been good, doll..." he whispered. "We could have been something great."

"Please..." you groaned.

At that moment you heard a shot. You didn't know where it came from, but you saw Mike stagger and fall hard to the ground. In an instant Patrick looked up, then looked at you.

"Who is it?!" he growled angrily, pressing you against the trunk so hard that you felt something stab you painfully in the back.

"Your Death." you gasped.

Another shot and warm blood splattered on your face. You slid to the ground gasping for air. Patrick's body lay beneath your legs. Strong hands grabbed your arms and then your face.

"Are you okay?"

Joel!

You nodded your head violently. He noticed the bonds on your wrists and when he looked around he saw the switchblade lying in the grass. He quickly cut the rope. In a second your arms were wrapped around his neck and a quiet cry escaped your throat.

"It's okay, I've got you." he whispered, stroking your hair and back "You're safe."

☆☆☆☆

Thank you for your time.

taglist, i think: @picketniffler @orcasoul @bbyanarchist

[marysfics]

Through the Dust

Alexia Putellas x DownhillRacer!Reader

Status: Ongoing

Other Chapters: click here

This is a multichapter fic, and trust me, you’re in for one wild ride. Warnings: Fluff, Mentions of Grief, Kisses, Smut.

Word count: 3.5k

Chapter 7: "Between the Words We’ve Yet to Speak"

The flight from your hometown to Barcelona felt longer than it should’ve. The anticipation, the excitement, the uncertainty—it all mingled inside you, creating a knot in your stomach. But there was something else too. Something warm and hopeful, like a part of you was being drawn to the city for the first time. You weren’t sure how much of it had to do with the place itself or with Alexia. Either way, you were on your way.

When you finally arrived in Spain, the weather was warmer than you expected, the sun shining brightly, a stark contrast to the chilly mountain air you had grown accustomed to. Alexia was waiting for you at the airport, her smile wide and genuine as soon as she spotted you among the crowd.

She was dressed casually, a soft sweater and jeans, but the way she looked at you, as if she hadn’t seen you in years, made everything around you fade. You could feel the weight of the last few weeks lift, replaced by a sense of peace that only her presence could bring.

“Hey,” she said softly as she pulled you into a hug, the scent of her perfume mixing with the fresh air. “Welcome to Barcelona.”

Your heart fluttered, and you couldn’t help but smile. “Thanks. It’s… good to finally be here.”

“Let’s get you settled in,” Alexia said, pulling back slightly but keeping her hand on your arm. “I want to show you everything. And, if you’re up for it, maybe even let you stay at my place tonight.”

You blinked, your heart skipping a beat at her words. “Your place?”

“Yeah,” she smiled, shrugging slightly. “You’re my guest, after all. You’ve come all this way, I should take care of you.”

Your cheeks flushed a little, unsure if it was the warmth of the city or the way she was looking at you that made you feel so nervous. But you nodded, managing to breathe out a smile. “Okay, I’d like that.”

As Alexia drove you through the vibrant streets of Barcelona, the city felt alive in a way that was hard to put into words. The sun reflected off the buildings, the hustle and bustle of the city mixing with the hum of the Spanish language, but all you could really focus on was the woman sitting beside you, her hand occasionally brushing against yours as she navigated the streets.

She took you to a small café for lunch, a cozy place tucked away in one of the quieter streets. It was here that you noticed how much Alexia loved this city. She spoke about it with such familiarity, the small details—the hidden gems, the quiet parks, the cafes where she liked to spend her afternoons. You loved how much she shared, how effortlessly she made you feel like part of it.

Afterward, she led you around the city, showing you the famous sights—the stunning architecture of La Sagrada Familia, the winding alleys of the Gothic Quarter, and the colorful mosaics of Park Güell. You walked together, talking and laughing, but there was an underlying tension between you that neither of you addressed—at least not yet.

As the sun began to set, casting an orange glow over the city, Alexia took you back to her apartment, a cozy two-bedroom flat in the heart of Barcelona. It was small but filled with warmth and character. The walls were lined with bookshelves, and the windows let in the soft golden light of the late afternoon.

“Make yourself at home,” Alexia said, showing you to the guest bedroom. It was modest but comfortable, a few simple touches here and there that made it feel personal. You placed your bag on the bed, suddenly nervous as she lingered by the door, her hand on the frame.

“Hey, I know it’s a lot to take in,” she said softly, her eyes meeting yours. “But… if you’re comfortable, you can stay here. I want you to. I want you to feel like you have a place here.”

You swallowed hard, your heart racing as you tried to form the words you’d been wanting to say. “Alexia, I… I think I want to be more than just a visitor here. I want to be with you. Not just in this city, but… I want to be with you, with everything that means.”

She didn’t answer immediately, her eyes searching yours as if she were trying to read something she wasn’t sure she understood. Finally, she smiled, though it was a little unsure, and nodded. “I want that too.”

You breathed a sigh of relief, the tension in your chest slowly easing. You reached out, your hand gently touching hers, a quiet promise between you. “Good.”

You both stood there for a moment, the weight of your words hanging between you. The air felt charged with something unspoken, something new. Alexia’s gaze softened, and without another word, she closed the space between you. Her hand moved to the back of your neck, her fingers brushing against the skin there, sending a shiver down your spine.

Before you could even process it, she leaned in, her lips brushing against yours with a tenderness that stole the breath from your lungs. The kiss was slow, hesitant at first, as if both of you were testing the waters, unsure of how deep this new connection would go. But it didn’t take long for that hesitation to fade.

Your lips moved together more firmly, and you let yourself melt into the warmth of her embrace, the reality of what you’d just confessed sinking in. It felt right—natural, even. Every doubt, every fear about this being too soon, too fast, faded as you felt her heart beat against yours. She pulled you closer, deepening the kiss just enough for the moment to stretch on, each second building more and more intimacy between you.

When you finally pulled back, both of you breathing a little heavier, a smile tugged at the corners of Alexia’s lips. Her eyes were brighter, more alive, and you felt a surge of relief flood through you.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while,” she whispered, her voice low and full of meaning.

Your cheeks warmed at her confession, but you couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face. “Me too.”

It felt like the beginning of something real, something that had always been there but was only now being fully realized. And as Alexia brushed a strand of hair from your face, you knew there was no turning back. This—whatever it was—had only just begun.

A playful glint entered your eyes as you teased her, a mischievous smile tugging at your lips. “So, I guess that makes you my girlfriend now, right?”

Alexia blinked, her eyes softening, then her lips curled into a grin. She stepped a little closer, her voice warm and full of affection. “I like the sound of that,” she said, her fingers lightly tracing the edge of your jaw. “I’m definitely okay with that.”

You both laughed, the tension from before easing away completely as the reality of your relationship began to settle in. It felt easy, natural, and with the way Alexia’s smile made your heart flutter, you knew that this was just the beginning of something truly special.

The next day, Alexia decided to take you to her family’s house. She’d spoken about them so much, about her mother, Eli, and her younger sister, Alba, and now, you were about to meet them.

As you arrived at her family’s home, a warm and welcoming house in a quiet neighborhood, you were greeted with open arms. Eli, Alexia’s mother, was a strong woman with a welcoming smile. She immediately pulled you into a hug, making you feel as if you’d known her for years.

“It’s so good to finally meet you,” Eli said, her eyes kind as she held you at arm’s length. “Alexia talks about you all the time.”

You felt a slight blush creep up your neck. “She does?”

Eli chuckled softly. “Of course. You’ve made quite the impression on her.”

Alexia shot her mother a teasing look but didn’t comment, instead leading you to the living room where Alba was sitting, casually flipping through a magazine.

“Alba, this is the person I’ve been telling you about,” Alexia said, giving you a warm smile before turning to her sister.

Alba, still a little surprised, looked up at you with wide eyes. “So, you’re the one who’s made my sister act all weird and smiley?”

Alexia blushed at that, her hand brushing through her hair in a rare show of embarrassment. “Alba, come on…”

But Alba wasn’t letting it go that easily. “Seriously, I can tell. She never smiles like that unless she’s talking about something—someone—special.”

You laughed softly, feeling more at ease with Alexia’s family than you expected. But as the conversation continued, the mood shifted a little. Eli seemed to get a little quieter, her eyes going soft as she asked, “Alexia, do you ever talk about your father?”

Alexia stiffened slightly, her gaze flickering to you before back to her mother. “I do. Sometimes. Why?”

Eli’s voice was gentle as she placed a hand on Alexia’s. “I just think she’d like to know more about him. Where you come from, what shaped you.”

The conversation turned to stories about Alexia’s father, a man who had passed away years ago. You could tell how much it affected Alexia, the loss still fresh in her heart, but she shared what she could—the way he taught her how to ride a bike, how to fight for what she wanted, how to love fiercely. It was clear that, though he was gone, his memory lived on in the way Alexia carried herself.

As the conversation flowed, you could feel the weight of the memories in the room, the love and sadness mixed in Alexia’s eyes whenever she spoke about her father. She had clearly inherited his strength, his passion, and that same fire to fight for what mattered most. But there was also a soft vulnerability there, something raw, something you hadn’t seen before in Alexia.

Eli continued with the stories, sharing moments that made Alexia laugh softly, a few others that made her eyes glisten with unshed tears. She told you how Alexia’s father had always pushed her to pursue her dreams, no matter how difficult, how scary it seemed. And how, after he passed, Alexia had become the pillar of strength for their family.

"She was only a kid, but she stepped up like a grown woman," Eli said, her voice thick with emotion. "Her father would be so proud of who she’s become."

Alexia looked away for a moment, swallowing hard, her hand instinctively reaching for yours on the couch. You gently intertwined your fingers, offering her silent support, though you could sense the internal battle she was facing. She rarely spoke about her father in such depth, and it was clear that this conversation was both painful and cathartic for her.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to make things heavy,” Alexia said, her voice softer, a little quieter than usual. She leaned into you just a little, seeking the comfort you always seemed to provide without even realizing it.

You gave her hand a gentle squeeze, offering her a reassuring smile. "It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize. I understand."

Eli’s eyes softened as she watched the two of you. "It’s just that… I know how much she’s been through," she said, looking at Alexia, then back at you. "But I also know she’s found something—someone—who makes her happy. And I can see it in her eyes when she looks at you."

Alba, ever the teasing younger sister, couldn’t resist. "Oh, please," she said, rolling her eyes playfully. "This is the most I've ever seen my sister blush. I swear, I’ve never seen her this… well, happy, I guess."

Alexia’s face turned bright red, and she swatted at her sister, laughing. "Alba, stop! You’re making it awkward."

You chuckled along with them, the warmth of the moment easing the weight of the earlier conversation. It felt good to see Alexia, who had always been so strong and composed, letting her guard down a little, sharing her past and her emotions with you.

After a few more light-hearted exchanges, the evening took a more relaxed turn. Alexia’s mother, Eli, offered to make dinner, and the three of you—plus Alba, who kept teasing Alexia in the most endearing way—settled into the kitchen. You helped, albeit clumsily, as Alexia and Alba bantered, clearly at ease with each other.

The evening was peaceful, comforting in a way you hadn’t expected. You realized that Alexia’s family, her mother, and sister, were more than just her past—they were an integral part of the person she had become. And, as you sat there, laughing over dinner, you began to feel like you were becoming part of that story too.

Later, as the evening drew to a close, and the two of you found yourselves sitting on her bed again back in her apartment, a quietness lingered between you and Alexia. The night was winding down, and the soft buzz of the city outside could be heard faintly in the background.

Alexia leaned closer to you, resting her head on your shoulder, her hand still clutching yours. The comfort of her touch, the intimacy of the moment, settled over you like a soft blanket.

"I think they like you," she whispered, her voice gentle, her fingers tracing soft patterns on your palm.

"I like them too," you replied, a small smile curling on your lips. "You’re lucky to have them."

Alexia looked up at you, her expression soft but conflicted. "Yeah, I am," she said, her voice tinged with something you couldn’t quite read. "But they’re right. My father… he’d be proud of me for having you in my life. And I want you to know that."

You felt a gentle tug at your heart as you processed her words. It was as if she was letting you into a part of her life that only a few people truly knew, and you wanted her to feel that same warmth, that same acceptance, from you.

“I think my sister would have said the same thing about me,” you replied softly, your voice steady but filled with meaning. “She always wanted me to find someone who saw me for who I really am… and I think she’d be proud of me, too, for being here with you.”

Alexia’s eyes softened at that, a quiet understanding passing between the two of you. It was in the way she looked at you, as if she could see the bond you shared with your sister, and maybe, just maybe, it helped her feel less alone with the loss of her own father.

There was something unspoken between the two of you now—this shared understanding of loss, of love, and of finding the people who would stand by you no matter what. It felt like you both had finally found that with each other, and that knowledge filled you with a quiet sense of peace.

She reached over and squeezed your hand, her touch warm and grounding. "I’m glad you’re here," she whispered, her eyes locking onto yours.

"I’m glad I’m here too," you whispered back, your heart full of something you couldn’t quite explain. But it was good. It was right.

That night, everything felt different. The quiet hum of the city outside blended with the soft rhythm of your breathing as you and Alexia sat on her bed, a magnetic pull between you both that was impossible to ignore. The tension that had been building up between you over the past few days was thick in the air, charging every touch, every glance. It was almost as if the room itself held its breath, waiting for what was about to happen.

Without a word, you closed the small distance, the space between you shrinking until there was nothing left but the weight of your hearts beating in sync. The moment felt inevitable, and it was in that split second, when everything in the world seemed to slow down, that you kissed her.

The kiss started slow, hesitant at first, but the urgency of it quickly took over. It deepened, a mix of longing and something more—something raw and powerful. Your hands found each other as if they'd always known where to go, your body pressing against hers as the kiss turned more desperate, more urgent.

When you pulled back for a moment, gasping for air, you both looked at each other. An unspoken understanding passed between you—this was real, this was happening. You could feel the heat between you, and there was no turning back now.

Alexia's eyes were soft, but full of admiration and something more, something that made your chest tighten. You could see it in her—her raw vulnerability, her need, and a quiet desire to be seen for who she truly was. You weren’t about to shy away from that.

You leaned in again, your lips capturing hers once more, this time with more intensity. As your kiss grew heavier, you felt her hands move down your body, slow and purposeful, pulling at the fabric of your shirt, eager to feel your skin. Your hands mirrored hers, tugging at the buttons of her shirt, pushing it off her shoulders until the soft fabric slid down her arms, revealing the skin you had yearned to touch.

You both moved with a kind of urgency now, each of you needing the other in a way that words couldn’t express. You hovered above her as she lay back against the bed, her body yielding to the moment, her hands guiding you closer. You couldn’t help but admire the way she looked beneath you—her breath shallow, her chest rising and falling in rhythm with your own.

You began to knead your hands over her body, feeling the smoothness of her skin, the muscles that were a testament to her strength. She responded with a small moan, her back arching slightly as you worked your way down. When your hands reached the waistband of her pants, you felt her tense, her breath hitching in her throat. You paused, sensing the shift in her body, and pulled back slightly to look at her.

Her eyes met yours, vulnerable yet filled with trust, but there was something else in them too—something that made you hesitant. You could see the anxiety in her expression, the momentary insecurity that flashed across her face.

"Are you okay?" you whispered, your voice soft and steady, trying to read the emotions flickering across her features.

Alexia swallowed, her lips trembling just a little. "Yeah," she breathed out, her voice quieter than before. "I just... sometimes I get in my own head. About things people have said about me."

You nodded, understanding immediately. The world had been cruel to her before, making her feel less than she was, and it hurt you to see her struggle with those insecurities now. You leaned down, brushing a strand of hair from her face, and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"You’re beautiful," you whispered, your voice full of sincerity. "Exactly as you are."

The tension in her body eased slightly at your words, but she still looked uncertain, as if the fear of being judged was too big to ignore. You wanted to make her feel safe, wanted to make her feel like she didn’t have to be anything but herself with you.

“I’m here with you,” you murmured, your lips trailing over her jaw, down her neck. “And I want you—just as you are. No pretenses.”

Alexia’s hand found yours again, squeezing it tightly as she pulled you back to look at her. Her gaze was full of a mixture of vulnerability and gratitude, and for a moment, the world outside disappeared. It was just the two of you, with nothing else between you but the truth of what you shared.

“I’m ready,” she whispered, her voice low, but full of certainty this time. “With you.”

And with that, you let go of all the doubts, all the insecurities. You kissed her once more, this time without hesitation, this time letting your bodies speak the words your hearts had been too scared to say before.

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End of chapter 7.

[lousycapy]

How statistics can easily be manipulated to fit a certain agenda in Formula 1

Hello! I’ve seen a lot of f1 fans or media sources bring up statistics incorrectly to prove their points recently, which is really getting on my nerves. So here is a comprehensive guide, with examples, of how statistics work and why they are not the be-all and end-all some people might think them to be. This is a pretty long post, so the explanations are all below the cut. With that, I hope you find this useful!

Multiple factors come into play when analyzing a statistic, so I’ve separated them in different categories: what data set is used to make the stat, how the stat can be interpreted and how being factually correct doesn’t equate a valid argument :

THE DATA SET

To make a statistic, you first need values which correspond to a data set. What said data set is made of is very relevant to the exactitude of the stat and how much regard should be given to it.

For example, to determine the average lap times of a driver over a stint you would need to divide the sum of all lap times by the number of laps executed. Which means that theoretically you could use a single lap as an average, e.g. 1:57:325/1 which gives an average lap time of 1:57:325s.

However, as you might imagine this stat is not representative of a driver’s stint, since the lap chosen to be analyzed could very well be an outlier. That’s why sample sizes matter, the more values make up your data set, the more representative of reality the result obtained is.

It is also important to know what the data set consists of. Let’s reuse our average lap times of a driver over a stint example, are outlaps/inlaps included? Is it based on clean air, dirty air? Are there laps excluded due to driver mistakes (e.g. going off track)? A stat being presented without any explanation of how it was calculated is absolutely worthless.

Finally, comprehension of the data set is very valuable as well.

Let’s imagine this fictional scenario where Ferrari makes Charles and Carlos compare average lap times. They both use the same car, on the same track, on the same tires, at the same time, for a stint of a total of 10 laps. Both drivers average a lap time of 80.125s over their whole stint, so is the conclusion that they have both done the exact same thing accurate? No!

Despite having the same average lap times in this scenario, the data set suggests a different conclusion, and different trends. Considering stints in a race are going to be longer than 10 laps, it can be assumed that Charles would average better lap times thanks to his consistency compared to Carlos, who would get worse lap times as time passes as can be observed thanks to the trend line in his graph.

2. INTERPRETATION OF THE DATA

Now that we can recognize the importance of the data set and its constituents, it is time to understand how the data provided can be used to make a statistic.

More than one answer can be correct based on the same sample of data. Despite using the same set, depending on how the data is used it can lead to different statistics that drive different arguments both being factually correct.

For example, I’d like to refer to the wonderful basspro24chevy World’s Destructor Chamionship from Brazil 24 on Reddit in an effort of determining who is the most destructive driver. Here is a chart I’ve made which also includes number of races each driver took part in (Ollie not included I was too lazy to recalculate how it affects the drivers he’s replaced’s damage bill) and the average cost of damage per race of each driver.

Based on these statistics, both arguments could be made to justify either Checo being the most destructive driver, since he’s the one who’s cost his team the most damage over the whole season, or Franco, since he’s the one who on average costs the most for his team per weekend.

Depending on someone’s biases, they could make some drivers look better than others despite using the same data set as another person, and depending on how their argument is justified even if they end up with a different conclusion it doesn’t mean they aren’t right as well.

3. FACTUALLY CORRECT ≠ VALID ARGUMENT

Even if you are factually correct with your statistic’s interpretation, and it is based on an acceptable data set, it doesn’t mean it has a direct link of causality with your argument and provides validation to the point you are trying to make.

For example, someone could argue that Checo is a safer pair of hands in races than Pierre, because over the course of the 2024 season he has DNFed 2 out of 21 races, meanwhile Pierre has DNFed 3 out of 21 races. However, the point being argued here is which driver is a safer pair of hands, and other variables than the drivers come into play when discussing those two’s DNFs.

Indeed, Checo drives a RedBull with a Honda engine, whilst Pierre drives an Alpine with a Renault engine. Out of Checo’s 2 DNFs, 2 were caused by driver mistakes. Out of Pierre’s 3 DNFs, 3 were caused by engine issues. The World’s Destructor Championship can also be used as a counterpoint to Checo being a safer pair of hands than Pierre by comparing damage bills.

Thus, instead of the conclusion being that Checo is a safer pair of hands than Pierre, the DNFs statistic is more appropriate to conclude that the Honda engine is more reliable than the Renault engine.

Which means that to make a valid argument, you need to be able to explain why the statistic presented is relevant and what it suggests. Alleviating circonstances also need to be taken into account to solidify the point being made.

For example, let’s imagine a scenario where Fernando is 1.235s off Lance during a qualifying run. To use this stat in an argument, you need to be able to justify why he was so far off. Was it genuine pace? Did he make a mistake which ruined the lap? Were they on the same tires? Was it track evolution? Are they on the same setup? Did Fernando come across traffic? Did Lance get a significant tow?

Contextualization matters twice as much as the actual statistic being presented, because the statistic without context can easily be manipulated in a way to drive a certain agenda.

4. CONCLUSION

All in all, what I’m trying to say is that even maths can be used to drive agendas. Statistics can not be taken at face value, because there are multiple factors that can influence their relevance. I hope you found this little guide helpful, and that it will help you analyze better the information you see online on how drivers are performing (or argue better with crazed fans, you do you 🫡)

Thanks for reading and have a good day!

[cobaltperun]

Jerks With Hearts of Gold - Work For It

Request: Tara Carpenter x Female Reader

Summary: The first kiss should not be this difficult to get, yet nothing is ever easy for Tara Carpenter.

Masterlist / Side story of this request

Word count: 2.7k

She could no longer deny it, she could no longer fight it, and she hated every single thing about it. Except she didn't actually hate it, she absolutely loved it, only she would never admit it, especially to anyone other than herself.

Tara Carpenter was in love with a jerk.

How could this have happened? Sure, she wanted to live her life, set aside everything that's happened while being comfortably cautious about which people she let in, but she did not expect to let the biggest jerk of them all in. And if that wasn’t bad enough, she took it not just a step, but a fucking marathon further by falling in love with you. So, there Tara was, lying on her bed facing the ceiling and glaring at it as if she had your face painted right on it. She might as well have it painted there, because that's all she could see when she closed her eyes. Your smiling face, that stupid grin when you prove her wrong, or when you get the upper hand in a debate, or when you just annoy the living hell out of her.

“Jerk,” she muttered as she looked through window that was somehow facing the direction you were in. Of course, you were far away, too far for her to even see your neighborhood from her window, let alone your apartment, but just the fact that she knew she would be looking in the direction of your apartment if she looked outside her window infuriated her. Why did you have to be so good to her? You stopped smoking just for her, and that really was the true start of her downfall. But you couldn’t stop there, could you? Ever since she opened up about the attacks she survived you've been crazy attentive to everything she was feeling, noticing even the minute details about her mood shifts.

Somehow, despite only knowing you for a relatively short period of time, Tara was absolutely certain you wouldn’t turn out to be a Ghostface. Maybe worse than even that was how sure Tara was that if she confessed and you returned her feelings that the two of you would just stay together. That you would never break her trust or her heart.

And that just made her afraid that one day she would do that to you. Because there was that feeling deep inside of her, that thought that maybe she did ruin everything she touched, and that she just wouldn’t know how to let you love her.

Yet at the same time, Tara knew she wanted that kind of love, that almost unconditional love, more than she wanted anything in the world. So, Tara picked up her phone and sent you a message.

~X~

You were bored beyond what you imagined was humanly possible. You were so bored you might actually consider doing schoolwork that was still far from the deadline. That's how bored you were. You weren't in the mood for a movie or some new TV show or a new book or anything that would reasonably take more than a few hours to finish, but you also weren't in the mood to go out and have fun, or go to a stupid party if Tara wasn’t there, or anything of that nature.

Luckily, just as you were about to lament on your ruined night, your phone rang and you jumped to your feet cheering loudly that there was even a smidge of distraction to be had tonight.

You placed your palms together in front of your face praying to whatever higher being that might exist. “Please be Tara, please be Tara, please let me annoy her tonight!” because you would not be that desperate to actually send the message first. Not after sending the first message four times in a row.

You plucked your phone off your charger and the screen lit up and you pumped your fist at your side. “Yes!” you exclaimed. It was Tara. “Oh, I love this girl!” your eyes widened when you said that.

Well, you did love her, and you knew that, and you knew how you loved her, how much, and how intensely. But you haven't really said it out loud and with that sudden realization the urge to annoy her faded away and you just opened the message she just sent you.

Tara: Let's meet up tomorrow

Please I'm bored

Well, that was direct and right to the point, just the way Tara always was, and you grinned like a fool because you would get to see her tomorrow instead of waiting for the next week's classes. So, you replied with a simple ‘Of course! Usual time usual place?’

It took Tara less than a minute to reply, and you've never thought a simple ‘yes’ would make you this happy.

You walked back to the bed and just fell on top of it, still grinning. You loved this girl. You loved her so damn much and she didn't even know it and maybe, just maybe you could confess tomorrow. Just see how it goes. At least you won't be painfully stuck in friendzone and things would be clear, you would know if you should give up on these feelings or if you would just have to wait for some time until she got more comfortable. You understood perfectly well just how difficult opening up would be for Tara, and all you really wanted was to know if there was even the slightest chance that she might one day reciprocate your feelings.

~X~

She must have done something right lately because all of a sudden and without even considering all of those things Tara ended up being really lucky. First of all, she didn't have classes today, Sam was working, and all of her friends had classes, so no one was free to hang out with her. Not even Chad and he was the most relaxed about classes out of all of them. At least before the exams, once the exams were going then he was the one worrying the most.

That would probably be something you and Chad could bond over. You had the same annoying nonchalant approach before the exams only to completely flip it once exams actually started. She still smiled, because somehow, despite everything, she found that endearing.

The usual spot was your code of sorts, for a small secluded spot in the park that Tara found when she first came to New York, back when she felt the need to escape from everything and pretend she was just a normal teenager. And you came to appreciate the spot as well, so instead of hanging out in a café bar or some other place, one of you would get the drinks and the other some snacks and you just go and sit at the park. And it worked well, because not only was it a nice place where she could breathe easier, but it had designated spots for picnic, so that was just another plus in its own way.

Her heart was hammering in her chest as she walked through the park toward the place where you would meet up. The basket filled with your favorite food felt a lot heavier than it really was. You weren't really a flowers kind of girl, or rather Tara wasn't, she just felt that would be a bit too on the nose and she wants to be a bit subtle about everything. Although… There was nothing subtle about being twenty minutes early.

She picked a good spot for the picnic. The one with a nice shade, far enough from the people walking through the park, and light fresh breeze blowing through her hair bringing in the scent of the flowers blooming in the park.

“Guess we are both early,” Tara jumped when she heard your voice and flipped around to see you standing there sheepishly rubbing the back of your head, all the while holding a bag filled with a couple of bottles of probably juice if she had to guess. You were kind of boring like that, not really consuming alcohol, but she guessed that would make Sam like you more because you weren't some party animal.

“Damn it, you scared me!” Tara put her hand over her chest trying to calm her heart rate down. Getting scared was not one of her plans for the day!

Your eyes widened and immediately she could see the guilt on your face. “I'm sorry! I should have texted you or something, I just didn't want you to rush if you weren't here and-“ you facepalmed, you didn’t forget about anything, you just got eager to see her and she wasn’t expecting you. “God, I'm such a fool for scaring you like that!” there you were being the caring, gentle dumbass she fell in love with.

Tara smiled widely, unable to restrain her reaction. “Hey, it's fine, come on, let's just sit down and start this again, OK? Shit, look at us,” Tara laughed as you joined her, still looking at her apologetically. “We're like two teenagers trying to go on their first date instead of hanging out as friends,” she chastised herself and you to an extent because you were both nervous and she couldn't wrap her head around why you were nervous. She was the one who intended to confess her love for you… unless…

No, that couldn't be right.

The two of you knelt down on the blanket and began taking things out of the bag you brought, and the basket Tara brought. “You really went all out! And it's all homemade!” you commented, and Tara just knew you could see the blush on her face.

You only complimented her cooking, once granted she only cooked for you once, and ever since then has been practicing, wanting to impress you once more.

“I just grabbed the leftovers,” of course she wasn’t going to tell you the truth. She would die of embarrassment if that happened, but you knew, you probably knew every single time she uttered a ridiculous lie just to save face.

You snorted at that. “Of course, of course, I wouldn't dare to imply the great Tara Carpenter would prepare food for an occasion this beneath her,” you laughed and despite the joke you just said something just didn't feel right about it. It annoyed Tara more than she ever imagined it would. She just hated that there was a certain sense of self-deprecation within your voice.

So, Tara reached up, grabbed you by the chin and pulled you closer. “Don't you dare ever think that,” she leaned in, intending to kiss you and get all of this confession bullshit out of the way, and just show you how she felt instead. But then you smirked and pulled away from her and her hand was just left hanging in the air, empty, while her lips remained stuck, slightly pursed as she intended to kiss you.

“Work for it, Carpenter,” you did not just say that. You did not just deny her of the kiss she wanted for so damn long.

“What the fuck?!” Tara just stared. You actually did that to her. “Work for it? How do I- I mean- You know-“ she paused, taking a deep breath. “Was I reading this all wrong,” she gestured between the two of you. “And you actually don’t feel the same way? Y/N, I can take it if you don't feel the same way, I'm not some-“

You interrupted her by placing the tip of your finger on her lips and snickering and now she was just confused. “I do feel the same way, I love you too, Tara,” you said it so easily even if she didn't, even if she wasn't all that sure she could say those three words anytime soon, despite how genuinely she felt them. “I just want you to work for the kiss. You've been a pain in my eyes for so long, I deserve this!” you laughed and took a bite of the sandwich she so carefully prepared, choosing all the ingredients you loved, and here you were saying she had to work for the kiss.

“What do you even mean by work? How?! Tell me how?!” she demanded red in the face from the anger and the embarrassment and because she was denied of what she wanted and like a petulant child that was suddenly rejected she was just about ready to throw a tantrum.

And that wasn't like her. She was denied so many things as a child, it wasn't in her nature to throw a temper tantrum, yet with you she really felt like that. She felt like the way you were loving her, even when you were just friends, was allowing that child within her to come out for perhaps the first time in her entire life.

“Ask for it, you can’t just take it,” you winked at her. “Come on, now, Tara, all you have to do is ask,” oh, you were enjoying this. You got your victory. You knew she felt the same way that you did before you even uttered a single word and here you were eating it all up like the menace you were.

“I'm just not gonna do it,” Tara pouted and refused to look at you even if she knew you would just shrug and keep eating the sandwich.

“Whatever works for you,” you were being way too nonchalant about this and she should have been elated that you felt the same way that she did, but this was infuriating in so many ways. Of course it had to be like this with you it couldn't be just an easy, simple confession, followed by a soft kiss, followed by a passionate kiss that would threaten to consume both of you. No, it had to be this complicated and difficult because that's who you were and that's who she was. She was Tara fucking Carpenter and every single thing in her life just had to be complicated.

Well not this time.

“Let me kiss you,” she leaned in and you burst out laughing backing away once more not allowing her to claim her reward.

“That's not how you ask, dumbass,” you just laughed and sure, fine, she could play that game too.

“I want to kiss you,” you were still leaning away and she faked a smile, speaking through gritted teeth. “Come on, Y/N, people are watching. They're looking at me leaning closer to you and you are not working with me here,” she was working hard for it and she had the right to her hard-earned reward.

“Not the magic word, Tara,” surely you weren't going to make her actually ask for it! You loved her back, why was this so complicated! She even licked her lips to tempt you, and she saw you looking down on her lips, she knew you wanted to kiss her as well! You just weren't giving in.

Fuck…

“Please, can I kiss you?” there. She asked. You smiled and didn't back away as she leaned in and that was all she needed to just go in and press her lips against yours for a heated, passionate kiss. And when she pulled back, she truly was rewarded by getting to see you being a stuttering, embarrassed mess. “Cat got your tongue?” she asked and stuck her own tongue at you, the tongue that was mere seconds ago inside of your mouth because of course she couldn't go for a soft kiss for the very first kiss. She had to be intense with everything that's included.

Especially with this because you deserved to be loved just as intensely as you loved her.

Safe to say you failed to construct a proper sentence for the next twenty or so minutes. Frankly she was impressed it only took you that long to get your composure back and actually start putting words together in a way that made sense.

[s4bbatical]

Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want | Part 2 (Rivals Declan O'Hara x Reader 18+)

Part 1. Part 3.

Warnings: Profanities, smut, alcohol consumption and cigarette use. Age gap (reader!22)

━━━━━━☆━━━━━━

You were in a separate room at the Corinium with Seb, Declan, and Cameron Cook, discussing how to take down Rupert Campbell-Black. Ever since the incident at the Jones' dinner party, Declan has been hell-bent on taking down Rupert. There were folders filled to the brim on his desk with blackmail, although much of it was already public news.

"We've done all this research on Rupert," Seb starts, looking toward the three of you from the bulletin board of newspaper cuttings. "But what if he won't agree to be interviewed?" He queries.

"Don't worry, he will." Cameron affirms, leaning over the desk. "Alright. So, we start with the horsewhipping and move up to the cabinet minister's wife and his daughter."

"Wrong," Declan interjects. "English people care more about horses than they do women. We end with the horses and the Olympics."

You scoff, Tony Baddingham entering the room rather abruptly to sneak a glance at the work the team has done collectively.

"Imagine if this works," Tony says, his hands on his hips. "We annihilate the smug fucker on national television."

"Well-" You begin.

"Hello." Charles Fairburn says, entering the room suddenly with clipboard in hand. "What time do you want us all for the party tonight, Declan?" He asks eagerly.

"Oh. Wasn't expecting to see you there, Charles." Tony says with arrogance.

"Um," Declan closes his eyes with annoyance. "Eight o'clock should be grand. Are you okay Charles?" He asks. "You look a little worn."

"Uh, my mother's not been very well." Charles responds. "There's only me, so it's not been easy."

"Sorry." Declan says.

You look over at Seb, who simply shrugs as the rest of the room continues to make conversation about the party.

"Are you going?" You ask, to which Seb nods.

"Taggie invited me, I'm assuming you as well?"

"Yeah, she did." You and Taggie became friends over the French four-course menu at the Jones', assisting her with the menu due to her dyslexia. There was a fiasco over Rupert groping her, to which Declan nor you took well the next day in office. You were invited to the dinner for some reason, although you knew it was per Freddie's request. He saw something between you and Declan that no one else did, that was for certain.

"And Cinderella will go to the ball," Tony says, placing a hand on Cameron's shoulder and bringing your attention back to the room. "Just not this one. Happy New Year, all." He announces, walking away as Declan presses his hand to his forehead.

You hear a champagne bottle pop in the distance, wincing with your two higher ups.

"Oh Christ, it would be quieter to work from home." Declan states. "Let's pick this up next week, yeah?" He asks of you and Seb, the both of you nodding as the commotion in the office becomes louder. He leaves hastily, you and Seb lingering behind to gather your belongings.

"See you later, yeah?" Seb says rhetorically, a grin spreading across his face.

"Yeah, see you." You say, exiting the office briskly to eventually make your way home as your duties were no longer needed for the afternoon.

-

As you cooked yourself a mediocre meal with the radio playing in the distance, the phone rings. You turn off the stove, wiping your hands on the hand towel hanging off your stove as you take the phone off the hook. "Hello, y/n speaking." You say.

"Hey, it's Taggie." Taggie says timidly on the other side of the phone.

"Taggie, hi! What's up?" You ask, leaning against the wall.

"I just need someone to talk to, y/n." She explains, sighing. "It's too grand of a party my mother has thrown, I feel like I'm drowing in potato peels. Plus, she's sat herself beside Rupert." She says harshly, groaning as you hear yelling in the distance.

"Are you serious?" You say, twirling the cord between your fingers. "What a mess, Christ. Are you okay?" You ask,

"No, I just..." She sighs. "Remember that Ralphie boy I told you about? Well, he's shown up with a girlfriend." She exasperates.

"Oh, Taggie... Gag me with a spoon!" You exclaim, using your west coast slang. "I can come over earlier if you'd like, it's no problem at all." You say.

"No, no." She says, speaking to someone else in the room quickly before returning to the phone. "It's alright. I'll see you at eight, yeah?" She reaffirms.

"Yes, of course. Be easy on yourself, please. We can get super fucking drunk together and forget about it all." You jest, hearing Taggie laugh on the other line.

"Yes, course. See you later, y/n."

You hang up the phone, sighing as you cross your arms. Tonight was going to be real grand, whether you liked it or not.

-

You pull up to The Priory with your car that you bought for cheap, the engine louder than the camera shutters in the distance. You turn off your vehicle, stepping out of it and closing the door behind you. A velvet dress mimicking the style of the 40s clung to your waist, your hair cascading just past your shoulders. The blinding of camera flashes hits you as you approach the home, gripping your clutch for dear life.

"Y/n!" Daysee yells, beckoning you over.

You join her eagerly, entering the house together. You were taken aback by the guests and decorations, a glass of champagne already shoved in your hand. You and Daysee approach Sarah Stratton, who was accompanied by Lizzie and and James Vereker.

"I thought there was supposed to be celebrities here tonight." Daysee says in a tone of disappointment.

"Well there's definitely one." James chimes, referring to himself.

"Where?" Daysee says excitedly, looking elsewhere as you stifle a laugh at the interaction.

You glance around the room, noticing Taggie on the other side. You make your way over to her, placing your now empty glass on a table surface.

"Taggie!" You exclaim, getting the attention of your friend.

She instantly smiles, meeting you in the middle to give you a hug. "God, I'm so happy to see you y/n." She says, rubbing your arms before dropping her hands to her sides. "If I have to keep watching Ralphie with his girlfriend I might put a barrel in my mouth." She mutters, grabbing ahold of your hand. "Care for a tour?"

"Always, love." You say, grinning as Taggie leads you away from the crowd. You pass Declan, giving him a smile and a wave as you disappear around the corner, his eyes scanning over your entire body within seconds.

Taggie grabs a bottle of wine from the kitchen table, taking a swig before handing it over to you. "He gifted me a bracelet, I just thought I meant more than that." She whispers, putting her head in her hands as Caitlin bursts into the room.

"The bracelet's from Rupert!" She exclaims, nearly clearing you as you hold onto the table for stability. "Christ, sorry y/n." She exclaims.

"What?" Taggie says in dismay.

"It's 'R' for Rupert! He feels bad for touching you up at the Jones's." Caitlin exclaims.

You scoff, rolling your eyes as you take a swig of the wine bottle.

"Sounds about right. Too much money, too little sense." A woman you have yet to get the name of comments as her son lays upon the kitchen table beside her.

"Oh, wow. England is surely more entertaining than home." You mumble, scratching the back of your head. "What are you gonna do Tag?" You ask, Taggie looking off to the side in thought as she takes off the bracelet and discards it by the sink.

"Nothing." She snaps, taking an open bottle of champagne and swigging it. "Let's go celebrate Patrick's birthday, yeah?" She remarks, exiting the kitchen as you and Caitlin exchange worried looks.

The three of you re-enter the dining space, Caitlin explaining that your name card was beside hers, and shockingly beside Rupert Campbell-Black and Maud O'Hara. You watch with curiosity as Maud laughs a little too loud at Rupert's remarks, your eyes trailing elsewhere. You find yourself looking at Declan, who was watching Maud.

He says something dismissively to Tony's wife before standing up and walking away, taking a path that led him outside.

"I'll be back." You tell Caitlin, who nods in response. You follow Declan through a door that leads towards the open acres, spotting him lighting a cigarette in the middle of a field. You slowly approach him, holding the bottle of wine to your chest.

He spots you, taken aback by our presence. "Y/n, nice to see you." He says warmly, putting out the cigarette in the grass underneath his shoe.

"Likewise." You say, standing face to face. "How're you doing?" You ask, taking a swig of your bottle.

He raises his brows at your bottle, chuckling. "Could be better. How'd you get ahold of my wine?" He asks, pointing to the vessel in your hand.

"Taggie." You simply say, stretching out your arm. "Would you like some?"

He hesitates before taking the bottle, taking a large swig from it before sighing. "So you know about Ralphie, then?"

"Yeah, real pity. Your daughter is wonderful, he's cruel to not realize that." You say, taking the bottle back as Declan hands it to you.

"Thanks for being here for her, she really admires you." Declan says, smiling. "We both do." He admits.

You begin to smile, white knuckling the neck of the bottle. "She has a great father, that's why she's so lovable Declan." You say, giving him a look of longing. "I see Maud's distracted." You bring up cautiously, watching as Declan pulls out another cigarette and lights it. You hear Foreigner's I Wanna Know What Love Is start to play in the distance, setting the mood in a rather ironic feat.

"No, really? I had no idea." Declan spats, looking up at the dark night before returning your gaze. "I have tried everything! Fucking everything to keep her happy, yet for some bloody fucking reason it's my god damn fault!" He yells, breathing heavily as you watch him with wide eyes.

"Declan-" You try to interject.

"She goes on and tries to fuck whoever she wants but I can't help but feel guilty whenever I look at you! God that fucking dress of yours!" He exclaims, gesturing towards you. He doesn't realize what he has admitted until he sees your reaction.

Your jaw drops slightly, taking in his words. "You... what?" You whisper.

He stares at you, his actions dawning over him. "Y/n, I-I'm sorry. That wasn't supposed to come out like that." He admits, tossing his second cigarette to the ground. He takes a step closer to you. "Ever since you started working at Corinium, you have never left my mind. You are the one thing I cannot let myself have, yet I think of you every waking hour." He explains, watching you closely as he continues. "When we danced at Bar Sinister and you left me in the dust, I felt defenseless. I wanted you so fucking badly, but I kept thinking of Maud. But now that I'm here, I don't care anymore. She can have what she wants, as long as I can get what I want." He whispers, pressing his forehead against yours.

You toss the half-empty bottle of wine to the side, letting it pour onto the grass as you grab his face and press your lips against his.

He eagerly pulls you in, hungrily kissing you like he had been waiting for centuries. You pull at his tie, undoing a the first few buttons of his shirt to reveal his chest, running your hands over it. The two of you fall to the ground, Declan unzipping your dress slightly to move his hand underneath the fabric. He maneuvers his free hand between your legs, rubbing gently against the fabric of your underwear as you moan against your own will.

"Declan-!" You say, tilting your head back in pleasure as his fingers slip into you, pumping feverishly as he reconnects his lips with yours.

"Y/n," He moans, kissing across your jaw as he begins to suck on the space between your neck and collarbone. His other hand finds your breast, kneading it gently as you try to keep your composure.

You couldn't believe that Declan O'Hara was fingering you by the tree line, but sometimes wildest dreams come true. You nearly yelped as you felt his mustache graze your clit, his mouth now fucking you as his fingers teased your bulb.

"Declan, please." You whimper, your hand running through his hair as he looked up at you from between your legs. You find yourself nearing your climax, your thighs pressing against his head as your back arches in ecstasy. You finally come undone into his mouth, your hand pushing his head away as you became too sensitive to the touch.

Declan smiles as you as he sits up, pulling you forward by your lower back to reconnect your lips. You could taste yourself on his mouth, somehow even more enamored by his actions.

"God, you are so beautiful when you cum, y'know that?" He murmurs, pressing more kisses along your neck.

You smile in contentment, tilting your head back. "If you enjoy it so much, do it as many times as you wish Declan." You whisper, pressing kisses against his ear as your hand palmed against his groin.

He groans, pulling his head back. "Mm, we'll have to arrange meetings in my office then." He says, kissing you once more. You start to undo his pants, which he tsks you for. "We have my son's birthday to celebrate. This can wait." He murmurs, redoing the button on his dress pants as he stands up, offering a hand.

You eagerly grab his hand, pulling yourself up onto your unstable legs. "Do you think anyone saw us?" You whisper, looking around.

"No, I highly doubt it. Everyone's inside completely smashed." He reassures, not realizing Charles had been waiting out in the garden for his secret lover, watching every move made between the two of you against his own wishes.

"For both of our sakes, I hope not." You say, recouping as Declan gestures for you to re-enter the home, giving himself a minute by lighting up another cigarette and fixing his attire before he enters.

A few moments later, you find a space between Seb and Taggie as Declan joins his wife in singing Happy Birthday for Patrick.

The clover cake is lit up beautifully, Patrick blowing out the candles as you all cheer. The attendees all sit down hastily as Declan begins his speech by tapping on the mic repetitively.

"Today we celebrate my son, Patrick, who was born New Year's Eve, 21 years ago." A few yells echo through the space before Declan continues, your eyes watching him closely.

"My son, makes me prouder than any father ever was." Declan says, attempting to hold back tears as you and Taggie awe in sync. "Yeats wrote, 'Life is a long preparation for something that never happens'. But when I look at my son..." He takes a beat, looking directly at Patrick. "I think Yeats was wrong." He places a hand on his son's shoulder before continuing. "My son was a brilliant boy, who is now a brilliant man. He has happened." He says towards the crowd, raising a glass.

You notice Taggie seeming disheartened by the statement, your hand placed upon her shoulder in silent comfort as she gives you a soft smile.

"So please raise your glasses for my clever boy, now a man. To Patrick!" Declan finishes, the entire room whopping with joy for his son.

"Are you okay?" You whisper to Taggie, who simply nods.

"I'm fine." She whispers before Patrick takes hold of the mic.

Your paranoia with your actions between you and Declan were already taking flight as you worried about someone seeing the two of you earlier, grabbing ahold of a discarded glass of champagne and raising it in toast for Patrick before slamming it back.

Patrick thanks his parents, beginning to thank a third party before his words come to a halt.

"Holy shit. Celestial light." He says into the mic, causing the whole room to turn their focus on whatever he was looking at.

Cameron Cook.

The whole crowd murmurs as Patrick begins counting down for New Years. You check your watch, leaning towards Taggie as you see him walk towards Cameron. "He's way too early." You mumble, watching in shock as Patrick kisses Ms. Cook.

You glance over at Declan, who seems bemused by his son's actions before you move your gaze to Tony Baddingham, who was most definitely sleeping with Cameron and surely not pleased with the sight. No one seemed happy about the actions bestowed upon them.

You notice Taggie looking over at Ralphie and his girlfriend, causing you to place a quick kiss on her cheek to distract her. "Happy New Year!" You exclaim quietly, Taggie giving you a force smile before exiting hastily.

You noticed Rupert watching her moves, causing your brows to furrow at the sight of Mr. Campbell-Black.

The crowd starts to sing in song, random goers linking hands with you as you watch Declan from a distance. He makes eye contact with you, giving you a subtle wink as you both look elsewhere. You smiled to yourself, not realizing the weight of what was yet to come.

Happy New Year, indeed.

-

oh my oh wow oohhh naughty naughty... I think i have to do a part three now ohh noooo blasphemy. thanks for reading as always and please do interact with my posts, it reminds me to keep the ball rolling :D

much love,

isabel

[missriddle03]

heyyy baby how are you i loved you matt story anddd i have request but for chris like reader did video with the triplets car video and like fans start to notice how he is always looking at you like that AND THANK YOUU

hello!!!! im good thanks for asking, wbu? tysmm for saying that :) this took me longer than i thought but seeing as you are my first request ever i wanted to do it properlly. hope u like it <3 @lovetaylorrussellgrr

Title: Favourite girl

parings: fem! reader (y/n) x chris sturniolo

small synopsis: have a look at the request

time to read: 6mins and 30 seconds (average)

word count: 1,449k words

warnings: none :) just a cute fluffy read

song recommended: favourite girl by justin beiber (loosley based on it) p.s i've not listened to it but it came up on yt and thought it would be good to use it for this

The moonlit sky was a pretty sight to see but you and the triplets didn’t see much of it as all of you were getting ready to film a car video. Nick sat in the back next to you whilst Matt and Chris were in their usual seats.

“Hello, hello, hello!” Nick spoke to the camera. You were looking at your phone but put it away once you saw they were recording. “So, we haven’t got a proper idea of today’s video but we have asked you guys to ask us some questions! even though most of them are about y/n”

To that, you let out a small laugh. “I can’t help if I'm a fan favourite”

Chris turned his attention to you and smiled. “You’re everyone’s favourite” Silence followed his statement until Matt decided to talk. “We each have pulled up our instagram responses and now we are going to go through them together” Nick picked up a pair of glasses and put them on his head, he found a pair that was heart shaped and handed them to you as you placed them onto your eyes. Nick took his phone out and took a quick selfie with you. “Okay! First question, who did y/n meet first?” Matt asked as he put his phone away.

A huge smile formed on Nick’s face waiting for your response. You hugged Nick before you spoke, “I met Nick first in school but then he introduced me to Chris and Matt last. Chris and Matt had different classes to me and Nick” you explained. Chris took his phone out to read a question, “Would y/n rather kiss Matt or Chris?” He turned his head to you staring. “There is no way I’m answering that” you protested. Your eyes darted between Chris and Matt but stopped at Chris before rolling your eyes and looking at your phone. You swore you heard Chris say something but if he did it was too quiet.

“Waffles, french toast or pancakes” you grinned at the reference. All of a sudden Nick began shouting. “NO! Not again..I am not dealing with this. This was dealt with and forgotten about, we will not be bringing that up again. NEXT QUESTION!” All three of you laughed as Nick said that. “Okay..okay, so three words that describe you”

Nick spoke first, “Awesome, funny and stylish” You nodded your head in agreement. “I think I’m cool, maybe funny too and the best driver ever” Matt said.

“No cause like, I tried passing my test but I failed on one thing because a car zoomed past me and I was meant to see it but they failed me cause I didn’t go but I can’t go when a car is going over the speed limit” you said. “They should have passed you,” Matt replied.

“I would say I’m actually the funniest, the hottest and a Pepsi enthusiast” Chris put his fingers up like mini finger guns and winked, you couldn’t help but laugh. Meanwhile, Matt and Nick stared at each other again. “How are we related to this guy?” Matt joked. “I guess I would say I’m creative, weird and very smart” You finally answered.

This went on and on for a while, constantly answering questions; “Okay, are you all single?” Matt spoke. Nick and Matt immediately nodded their heads not wanting any edits about them hesitating. “Yes I am single and I like the single life” you answered. Chris was hesitating his answer but all of you knew he was single. “Yeah I am too..for now”

“Is there someone in your life that you like then?” You asked him, he rubbed his hands together and looked at you. “Yeah perhaps there is but she don’t like me like that I don’t think”

“Well if she doesn’t then she doesn’t see how great you are, she obviously isn’t worth your time” you told him. A twinge of jealousy overcame you but you didn’t know why you felt that way, why were you jealous that Chris likes someone? Why was his confession so important to you?

“That is all we have for today’s Friday car video. We hope you enjoyed it,” Nick spoke to the camera. Chris was looking at his hands as he was picking his fingers, Matt took the camera and gave it a big kiss before turning it off. “Do you wanna stay over tonight?” Chris asked you. Matt offered her a snack that was in his car door, you took it and accepted the offer to stay over.

The next week, you told Marylou that you were going to surprise the triplets with a pizza seeing as you went to the UK with your friend for a week and didn’t tell them how long you were going away for. Matt’s car was in their driveway and once you gained the confidence you walked over to the car knocking on the door. You saw them all look at you before opening the door, “Did someone order a pizza?” you said with a smile. You placed the boxes in the car seat next to Nick and then you saw Chris open his car door and give you a hug. “y/n! There’s my favourite girl. I missed you, how have you been?” he asked. He didn’t let go..not just yet. “I’ve been good I wanted to surprise you guys cause I didn’t tell you that I was going to the UK”

Now he let go of the hug once he saw Nick and Matt get out of the car. They each gave you a smile and all of you went into a group hug, “The pizza I got you guys was a meat feast pizza, I made sure I got 2 because I know Nick doesn’t like too much meat on his pizza”

“Thank you so much y/n, I love you,” Nick said. “I’ll wait inside so you guys can finish your video” You said to the guys. Chris waved at you and the boys went back into the car and began eating the pizza.

They shortly came in and you opened your tiktok, your inbox being flooded with tags in edits. A majority of them were you and Chris edits. You decided to open one up, the audio was ‘idfc’ by blackbear. It contained video clips of when you’re talking and Chris looks at you, moments where you’re just standing and he is still looking at you. Every moment where you smiled and he smiled straight away. You swore he never looked at you that much, you remembered some of the videos used were from the video you featured in last time. All the comments were saying how oblivious you were and how you must be dating each other. You looked at another clip and it was dated for today, posted only half an hour ago titled ‘how he talks about her’

“Y/n is not in this video today as she is away with her friend in the UK. I’m not sure when she is getting back but she deserves a little break. I know we have had a lot of messages asking how she is and when she will be in our videos next but we don’t have a definite answer for you guys. I do wish that she was in this video with us but like I said she deserves a break. She works so hard, harder than anyone I know and I’m glad she’s taking some time off even if it’s only for a little while”

You never told them how long you would be away for, when you did go on a mini break you received a message from Chris nearly everyday. You were brought back into reality when Chris sat down next to you, with a smile on his face. “Watcha watching?”

You turned your phone off, “Nothing important,”

“So, I was thinking we could maybe watch a movie. Not sure if Nick and Matt will but we could always have microwave popcorn. Only if you want to of course”

“Sure..why not,”

You weren’t really watching the movie, just focusing on the thoughts in your head. You didn’t want to jump to conclusions but were you the girl he liked? Maybe you felt something for him too…just maybe.

He gave you the popcorn bowl, “I wasn’t sure what you wanted so I mixed the sweet and salted together” Chris was on your opposite side, manspreading with his hands in his jogger pockets. You swore you saw him occasionally looking at you, after all he did say you were his favourite girl.

“Are you okay?” he asked you.

“Yeah, Chris, I am,”

also..should i do a prt 2 the confession???

[shuggymaniac]

Story idea

Which is a mix between “Mermaid AU” and “Hades and Persephone AU”

Warning: dark!Sahnks

Shanks is a merman or a siren or whatever seas creature that is cool and I don’t know about. And Buggy is a simple human that comes across the sea creature when they were kids and kept is a secret ever since then. Shanks is so deeply in love with Buggy, dark level type of love, and he always gets upset when Buggy has to leave sometimes it ends with them fighting and Buggy not coming around for days which makes Shanks apologize profusely, promising he won’t do it again and begging Buggy not to leave again.

The love and obsession becomes worst as they got older. Buggy is a good swimmer so most times he would swim and dive which Shanks, and it was fun until Shanks’s possessiveness got the better of him making him almost drown Buggy because he didn’t want him to leave, enjoying this moment together.

Such thing would make Shanks panic he saves Buggy by drawing the attention of a passing human who manages to save Buggy, of course during all that Shanks was watching from afar all he could do is pray that Buggy will be ok. The passer did take Buggy to a hospital where he is saved.

After surviving his almost death because of his once best friend Buggy swears to never go back to the sea, if people asked he would say he is afraid of the sea when in fact he was terrified of what’s in it.

Shanks in the other hand had gone over the edge. Buggy didn’t return, did he die? Did that human kill him? Did Buggy leave? He didn’t mean that! He just wanted Buggy to stay with him forever, he is sorry her hurt blue, but his blue likes treasure, so he collects as much treasure as he can through out the years ready for the day when Buggy returns so he can give it all to him not only as an apology but also and a courting gift.

Years passed, and Buggy is invited to a friends party but he is not told that this party is near the shore. But because it has been decades since the “incident” Buggy gives it a try to indulge it, that maybe this was his step towards returning to the sea without being afraid that Shanks will kill him again. That he probably already had another victim and forgot about Buggy.

But he was so wrong…Shanks never forgot, how could he forget about his mate?

So when they cross paths again, Shanks plays it safe. He apologizes and tries to suppress the urges and instincts to just reach out and drag Buggy to him so he may never leave him again. It would take a while but with some patience and acting like Buggy’s disappearance didn’t affect him, Shanks gains Buggy’s trust.

It was small amount but it was good than nothing.

Is was way better because he convinced Buggy to eat a fruit he brought from the bottom of the sea, that it was very rare and difficult to come by. At first Buggy was very suspicious but then Shanks spoke about how he could sell it and gain a lot of his human money that he likes so much, but he should taste it first so that he knows it’s good enough.

And Buggy does just that…

All it took was one bite and Buggy’s body was burning and he couldn’t breathe. He could see Shanks but he couldn’t hear what he was saying or react much. Which made him terrified even further when with a wide happy grin Shanks started dragging Buggy into the sea, and if the blue haired man wasn’t so scared he would have realized how the sea water was cooling his body and his breathing, despite it being rapid, it was easier. Next thing Buggy know is everything going black as he lost consciousness.

When he woke up again Buggy felt different…. That something was very wrong. And then he sees it and he screams

Not only because he was in an unknown place, or that he was underwater, or that he didn’t have his clothes, but mainly because his body was no longer that of a human, it was like Shanks.

Hearing the scream Shanks will be there is seconds. He would take in Buggy’s angry punches and insults, it hurt to see the tears escape his eyes, but it was all necessary. To have Buggy here with him forever, to live together as they should have ages ago and no one will be able to take his blue away from him.

[almondmilkcleanser]

𝐒𝐮𝐛𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐀𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 — 05

SYNOPSIS - curiousity has played its role well with you - leaving you in between pleasure's whirlwind with the Phantomhive's most cunning, most skilled butler. How will you handle this arrangement?

■ ` ♡ characters / fandom ; f!reader x sebastian michaelis - kuroshitsuji + in a binding agreement

■ ` ♡ tw ; MINORS DNI

main menu | one-shots menu | chapter one | masterlist

■ ` ♡ VIP GUESTS TO THE MEAL ↷@preciousamethyst @crow-like-shiny-things @chrollohearttags @muvaginger @justaproudslytherpuff @kookie-vuitton @starstarbinks @flxxrence @urbunniebaby @nocturessa @neko-michaelis @maidensblessing @aiyaaayei

■ ` ♡ A/N → YKTV! Plagiarism not allowed. Please excuse any spelling/grammar mistakes

You admired your figure from all angles in your new attire. A fitted dress shirt, ruffled at the collar, and, what appeared to the naked eye, a particular black skirt. But Nina had something up her sleeve. She always did. She crafted the inner hem of your skirt to slit up your thigh in any event you needed to flee. In the cufflinks of your blouse carried holsters for small weapons just in case of emergency or urgency she repeated over and over. 

The inner layer of your blouse was double stitched, secure enough to shield your delicate bits from even the nastiest of exposures. But none of that held your attention.

“The fabric feels so rich! So soft and-” you inhaled the hem of your collar, sighing in deep admiration. Sebastian, nonchalantly sifting through a newspaper, looked up at you, smirked, and continued to look down. “Is that vanilla! No-” snif “Tangerine! Nina I love this! I don’t know how i could ever repay you.”

Nina plopped the excess fabric that weighed her shoulders down on the large Oak table. She plopped a finger on her bottom lip, her mind racing on an option. By how calculative she looked at you, you almost regretted even offering the option to her.

“Ah!” Sebastian clenched the newspaper, his nerves at a jolt. “I’ve got it!” this time, Sebastian narrowed his eyes at NIna as he looked over the newspaper.

“Must you conduct yourself like you’re standing in the center of a coliseum. We’re all right- here.” Nina puffed her cheeks, crossed her arms, and stared darts back at Sebastian. The invisible bolts of lightning became visible as the pair shared equally dissatisfied glances.

“Anywho!” NIna turned up her nose. “I’ll make you a deal. Come to my shop and model for me. I’ll give you the mock outfits every time I’m finished. And in return I’ll have a bunch of designs for the upcoming spring catalogue!” Nina snickered at her marvelous plan, sending Sebastian’s eyes to the back of his head. He neatly folded the newspaper and stood to his feet, clearing his throat signaling that it was time. 

“Well, I think that would be enough of that.” he stood to his feet. “The Young Master will decide on those arrangements, until then you should expect his company in the near future.” you could practically see the steam coming out of Nina’s ears.

“Sebastian.” you chimed up. Both Sebastian and NIna glanced at you. “I-” Why so many eyes on me?! “I think it would be a great idea.” you pretended to carry an air of confidence about yourself. Hopefully nobody saw through it like a translucent mirror. “What better way to expand the Phantomhive reach than to show to England that he helped assemble such fine fashion.” You took a step forward and spun around in a circle, giving Sebastian a full view of you from the front, the side, and an even longer glance from behind. 

When you turned back to face him, a beaming self-assured smile on your face, you could see his eyes snake from the bottom up. He had to remember that Nina was, with broad apprehension on her face and a mouth full of bitten fingernails, looking on to see his answer. He merely smirked as he walked to the door to hold it open for you.

“If it isn’t so much trouble for Y/N, i’ll see that she comes to visit you twice a month. No more. No less. Now, if you’ll excuse us, Nina.” He extended his hand out the door, and you took not a second too long to nod your head in thanks to Nina and hurry out of the shoppe. You and Sebastian weren’t but a few feet away, but you could hear Nina’s exasperated shouts of glee from inside the shop.

You followed at Sebastian’s side closely, careful not to bump into the other passerbys. So many muted colors of black, grey, brown, and the occasional tweed. It almost bored you to tears seeing the English fashion. On occasion, you would see a lady dawned in a damp violet or, if you’re lucky, baby blue! You scoffed aloud.

“Something troubling you?” Sebastian asked. 

“No, its just- seeing everyone out and about performing the mundane and dressing to match is so-”

“English. I know.” he agreed. “But we have to remember that everyone here is at a mentionable status. A figurehead, so to speak. “ He tapped his chin with a hmm. Trying to find the right words without being too boorish in his approach. But truthfully Sebastian grew so bored and so tired of it from time to time as well. Such mundane practices, day in and day out. No end in sight. How atypical the human experience could be in his eyes. And yet individuals could so happily continue on these practices for the sake of appearances every day, and then they die.

How damned is that.

“Its more complicated than what it seems.” you didn’t really buy his response, but at the moment you didn’t care that much. 

“Say, Sebastian.” you started up again. “What are we doing in the city anyway?”

“Just walking around.” eh?! “While you and the Young Master were still sleeping, I took it upon myself to venture into town. I delivered a few packages, paid off a few patrons, obtained some documents, petted a few kittens, gathered intel-”

“Wait. We’re not going to scurry past that statement, Sebastian.” you fought down a chuckle. “Did you say you were petting kittens? How does such an elegant butler like yourself find time to pet animals?”

Sebastian fixed his tie, averting his eyes away from you. “You always find time for simple pleasures.” His lips curled into a smile as he imagined you at your most vulnerable. You must have caught wind at his inner musings, for you looked away in a huff, your cheeks warm to touch.

“I’d remember to keep some questions of curiosity to myself.”

“Quite.” he so snidely agreed. You looked up at Sebastian who still beared a faint blush post-confession. You tried to play it off like you were clearing your throat, but even Sebastian could pick up the chortle underneath your hacking. 

A few taps at the top of the carriage, and the two of you were on your way back home.

❈❈❈ 

You sat across from Sebastian, a fresh basket of bread and lilies warming your lap. Your feet were tired from walking all around the city, but for whatever reason you didn’t mind it. Sebastian took it upon himself to guide you around the more elite sectors of the city. Introducing you to the more exclusive airs that England had to offer. 

The finest winery, elusive bakeries that had waiting lists to get inside, private dance studios that children of the elite would come and learn the arts. Ballet, poetry, fencing, you name it. With being apart of the Phantomhive manor, one could redeem many perks and coin in many, many favors throughout the years. And today, you finally realized just how much power the Phantomhives held. 

When you walked in with Sebastian, people recognized the Phantomhive insignia in an instant. And, like clockwork, people would move out of your way. They would bow their heads. They would proclaim high praises for Sir Vincent. So on and so forth. 

Luckily for you two, a bread and sweets bakery along your route just so happened to have fresh batches readily available for the two of you. Sebastian declined for himself, but instead fetched four large loaves of bread for you. You could smell its freshness and feel its warmth on your lap, making your stomach growl out of turn. 

“I can’t wait to have this with some tea when we get back.”

“I’m sure the Young Master would love a piece himself.” Sebastian mentioned thoughtfully. 

“Would you like some?” he raised his eyebrow at you. “W-while its still hot of course.”

“I’m afraid I would have to decline. But,” he moved from one side of the cart to the other, sitting next to you with both of your knees touching. He moved the basket off your lap and onto his.

“I’d like to feed you some.” You tried to stop the gasp that came out of your mouth, but it was too late. Sebastian faced you head on, his gloved hands breaking off a piece of bread into near-perfect meticulous pieces. 

“You’re hungry. And unless you’d like to cause me trouble back at the manor, I’d liike for you not to fall unconscious during the remainder of your shift today.” Shit, do you really have to work more after running such a llong errand? 

“I am hungry but- this isn’t necessary, Sebastian. I-” While your mouth was open, he took the opportunity to stuff your cheeks with warm, buttery bread. The soft, fluffy texture melted in your mouth, making you close your eyes to savor each bite. When he saw you were finished, he popped another piece of bread into your mouth, and with eyes still closed, you moaned in satisfaction at the craftsmanship performed on each delicate piece! 

This was far different than the, sometimes old, and sometimes soggy, pieces of bread you would accumulate before working for the manor. How you would go days without an adequate meal or, when you did, you would hand it off to someone else that seemed to need it more. Now, here you were, being fed bread by a demon butler that you signed a sexual contract with in a lavish carriage. 

Who knew your adult years could take such an aspiringly pivotal turn. Right off a cliff. 

“One more.” you requested. Your plushy mouth was already foming a narrowed ‘O’, preparing for the next savory bite. “One more and I think I’ll be satisfied.”

“Is that so?” Sebastian smirked reassuringly. He tapped the top of the carriage 4 times, causing the coachman to slow down to a halt. You just assumed he stopped to check on the luggage sitting behind him. Unknowingly to you, the coachman, under what seemed like a sleepy trance, hopped off the carriage and wandered into the forest. He muttered incoherently to himself, his walk staggering left and right. But he continued to walk until there was only a hushed rustling of bushes, until eventually nothing was heard and nothing was en route to cross your paths. 

“Keep your eyes closed.” his dark, silky voiced dropped to a whisper. He fished around in the basket for a new piece as you sat there, eyes playfully closed, anticipating another piece until-

“Mmh!” You felt his cool, soft lips press against yours. He held you by your shoulders, pinning your back against the plush carriage chairs. His knee pushed between your legs, raising your skirt inch by inch until it was bunched around your upper thighs. 

You could feel his hunger. His want. His need for you. How taunting it was for you to be in arm’s length all day and he could only watch and wait. He could only imagine what it was like to have you sprawled across your bed, your wanting eyes tracing the outline of his silhouette, body and mind crying out for his touch. 

But seeing you, with such an unquenchable thirst building in the back of hsi throat, made him pounce. He pressed his fingers into your blouse, intensifying the kiss moment by moment. Your tongues latched onto eachother, playing a friendly game of tug and war. He broke the kiss, practically growlingin your ear as he kissed the base of your neck. 

You threw your head back into a moan. “Sebastian, we’re out in the open.” He swiftly unbuttoned your blouse and unlatched the front of your  bra. His eyes never met yours. “Someone could see us, Sebastian.” his long, rugged tongue latched around your erect nipples, pulling and suckling at your sensitive flesh, causing your own moans to escalate. The lust in your body grew at an increasing rate. The warmth of your pussy burning a hole in between your expensive stockings. 

“Sebastian-” he stopped your worrying with another kiss. His gloved hands cradling your breasts and circling them around and around. You succumbed, wrapping your arms around his neck to deepen the kiss. He pulled your stockings down to your ankles, adjusting his body so that you were on under him and his body was hovered over yours.

You almost forgot that you were in a carriage how accommodating and flexible Sebastian was. 

He freed one of your feet from its nylon prisons and bent your knee to your chest. With his eyes to yours, he popped his middle and ring finger into his mouth with a smile. Coating it with his saliva from base to tip. 

“You’re so beautiful when you look at me like that.” Your glistening eyes spoke a silent message to Sebastian. How you switched from being such a strong-willed, determined woman to one of a needy, luscious, and smoldering one turned his head upside down. To see you, staring at him with Bambi eyes as you begged, pleaded for his throbbing cock to fill you up just drove him into an animalistic headspace. 

“Sebastian,” you breathed. Your honey-riddled tones so sweet. You felt him split you open, filling you inch by inch. Sebastian groaned aloud at your tightness, his own face breaking out into a light sweat. You shuddered underneath his touch. His large thumb circled around your throbbing clit, pressing down as he entered you back and forth. Back and forth. Back and fucking forth. 

“Oh- God! P-please, Sebastian!” on instinct you grabbed his wrist with one hand, your orgasm budding and blooming the more he played with you. He pushed your hand away, pinning it atop your head, his knees opening your legs wider and wider. Your viscous nectar replaced his spittled fingers, creating a sloshed, slicked mixture that coated your inner thighs, ass cheeks and the carriage chairs. 

“You’re so warm, and so- so wet. Is this all for me?” In a tease, he pulled his fingers out of you, gleefully popping them in his mouth. He took both fingers, and opened his mouth so you could see him trace them on his tongue. Your sticky essence creating lines across his tongue and atop the roof of his mouth.

He leaned down to kiss you so you two could savory your flavor together. As your tongues interlocked again, he fished his member out of his trousers. The droplets of pre-cum dripped against your inner thigh, mixing with your juices, and slowly sliding down your thigh. 

“Dammit-” he breathed. “I’m going to enjoy this. I’m most positively going to enjoy you, as well. He smiled down at you, his demonic fangs protruding out the sides of his mouth. He pushed inside of you, groaning aloud at your warmth. Your wetness. Your everboding grip around his thickness. He had to catch himself. Closing his eyes and clearing his throat to refrain from exploding so soon. 

“Sh- Shi- Sebastian, you’re s- so deep. Please don’t tease me anymore~” you could almost feel Sebastian’s body shift. The air in the carriage grew thick, heavy, and taunting. You looked up at him and swallowed as he looked down at you and grinned. He pushed back your other knee to your chest, positioned himself again, and proceeded to move inside of you.

At first, his movements were slow, calculative, and considerate. But then, when he looked down at you, and how snug your pussy clenched onto him, a side of him came further and further to the front. He pressed his hands into your hips, leaving flesh-like indents around your ass. He slammed his hips into you, making you feel every inch of him. He stretched you open, giving you and your pussy limited time to relax and contract. He wanted all of you. Right here, right now.

“Ah! F- fu- fuck, Sebastian! You’re so deep inside of me-e-e~” You could feel your pussy creating new gateways for him to explore. You felt her stretch, contract, bend and mold to his every want and wish. An end not even being a question between you two. 

Droplets of your fluid splashed into the air as he continued to pound into you. Your juices coated his dick alll the way to the base of his pelvis, even dripping down onto his balls. He could feel you clenching, pulling him down deeper into the depths of yourself. 

“Good heavens, Y- Y/N, why are you so incredibly wet like this?” he pushed deep inside of you, keeping it there as he leaned down to kiss your neck, leaving subtly sized hickies along your neck. “Did you miss me that much? Hmm?”  letting go of your knees, he positioned both of his arms along the side of your head, balancing himself on his elbows. He kept his chest pinned down to you and proceeded to stroke again inside of you. He wanted to feel all of you. ever y crevice, every groove, every bend he wanted to claim it as his. 

You couldn’t help it anymore. Your voice cried out in perverse pleasure as he rammed in you. Circling his hips back and forth at a momentum that wasn’t of this world. He kept drilling you, begging to go deeper into you, thrashing your love nest, embedding an impression on your body that none other would be able to match. You wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck.

“G- gonna cum, Sebastian- Go- gonna cuuuuuum-” He responded simply by kissing your dampened cheek. 

“By all means, let it out.”

“You’re so beautiful when you cum.”

Damn that Sebastian! You wished he wasn’t so skillful but your body readily thanked him. Your eyes flew open, only to roll to the back of your head. Your body spasmed, a mixture of small to large thrashes overcame your hips. 

Your essence coated his dick, sliding down between your ass and staining the plushed seats underneath you.

“I love it when you spill all over me. F-fuck, that’s right. Let it all out, Y/N. It's not good to be so- fuc- pent up like this~”

As you continued your orgasm, thick globs of Sebastian’s cum came oozing out of you, your sticky fluids and his thick essence creating gel-like globs that seemed to seep out at a nonstop pace. 

He kissed your lips one more time, catching your breathless quivers, guiding you back down from your peak.

You’re so beautiful when you cum.

❈❈❈ 

“Do I really have to help Mei-Rin with the cleaning?” you buttoned up your shirt with a whine. Your hair was disheveled. Droplets of sweat were still resting on your cheeks and chin, and your body felt heavy. 

“Only for the first hour. We can’t make it obvious what we were doing as soon as we get back.” He balled up the leg of your stockings, crouching down to slide them on your feet and up your thigh. “If I were you, Y/N. I would enjoy that hour of freedom.”

“Oh? Why is that?”

“Because, according to our terms, I’m liable to redeem a full day with you as per our agreement.” Shit.

“B-but, in this carr- you’re not tired?!” Sebastian chuckled to himself.

“On the contrary, Y/N” his eyes flickered a warm auburn from his demonic red.

“I’m just getting warmed up. So.. Make sure you stretch.” he winked at you, knocking on the top of the carriage 4 times again. This time, the coachman shouted at the horse, and they were on the move again.

“Was he there the whole time?!”

“A fairly late response considering the deed is already done, don’t you think?”

to be continued.....

❈❈❈ 

A/N — plssss leave a comment, like and reblog! It really helpssss

[inthebeginning-rebellion]

Anyway my google docs are a mess right now but this I liked and this I will share.

Fade Birth

feat. she/her Rook and a romanced Emmrich.

-=-=-

He’d lived so much longer than he anticipated.

Fifty-two had seemed ancient, the decade and change gap between himself and Rook a yawning, gaping chasm of guilt and fear. By sixty-two, the fear had waned, and the grey speckling Rook’s hair and the way she complained about her knees bridged the gap most humorously. Seventy-two had come along compliantly enough, and had been spent consoling his beloved at her finally having to hang up the massive warhammer she simply could not swing the way she once could. Sword and shield, she groused, did not have the same ‘oomph’. The cane came around eighty-two, and he found he did not mind it so much as he may have once feared, especially when Rook gifted him an elegant bone and bronze one, carved with flowers and a skull atop the handle.

‘You look very distinguished. And you can hit people with it.’

He was still giving lectures and traveling back and forth from the Lighthouse and the Necropolis at ninety-two, his bibliography tripled from now almost forty years of partly residing in the Fade. Many conversations with spirits, the dead, and study of the Fade itself had left him with a variety of theories on longevity as a cause, and he began to wonder when, precisely, he would pass. He was still sharp of mind and wit, if more tired and inclined to sit than he had once been. He could not do nearly half the things he had once done while traveling with their companions on a quest to stop the gods, but his plants flourished and his career was storied. Manfred had begun attending his own adventures- never quite the linguist, he had become remarkably adept at magic in a way no wisp he had ever heard of had. He was a being of great depths, read voraciously, and had assisted in his own world-saving venture some decades ago that left Emmrich and Rook speechless and stunned. A wisp of curiosity, a man grown.

Each night, he had a cup of tea and Rook’s hand in his while they watched the mysterious depths of the Fade pass them by at the Lighthouse.

Glorious tranquility, eternity laid out before him.

At one-hundred and two, as per his request, Rook entombed him in the center of his study at the Lighthouse. A carved stone garden and gilded placard, his skull resting on a pedestal in the shape of an open book. He’d long wondered where he should put himself, if he should be put to rest with his parents, but as Rook had once said to him… Stories were about change. And so he was interred at home, where students could seek him out if they so wished.

She was struggling in her own advanced age, decades of hard combat and abuse to the body. Still, she often took his skull in her arms and climbed the staircase to sit on the balcony with him, to watch the Fade as he’d so loved to do. She talked to him, sat with him and conversed with Manfred.

He could not say, but he heard it all. Some spark of the man beating within the bones. Sometimes Manfred looked at him so intently that he thought for certain there must still be something there. Interesting, to have that thought. Obviously, there must be a remnant that Manfred could see, since that remnant could think enough that it might be there.

And so there was.

Rook died not too long after he did, a year or so later, sitting on the balcony with his bones and two cold cups of tea, one half sipped.

Quite suddenly, as the love fractured within that beating spark, he was standing there with his own skull. He felt old and young all at once, lines of life and death stretching out in eddies and waves out the window and all around him.

Not without her. Never without her.

Emmrich reached down and grasped her hand, and he pulled the way he had pulled decades ago to pull her from the Fade prison. Whatever energy he had grown here latched onto the dying embers of her own and empowered them, infused them, blew them into a roaring inferno as he dragged Rook out of her corpse and into his arms.

Glorious, to swing her around once again. Laughter bubbled into weeping into euphoria.

They stood before their own remains, luminous and starry-eyed.

“Emmrich…?”

“Darling.”

“Where… how are we-?”

“Oh my dearest, let’s not think too hard on it.”

She glittered with laughter, lines smoothed away by whatever soul tether the Fade had seen fit to gift them. He wondered if he looked younger than when they had met, or if, perhaps, they were seeing each other the way they held each other in their minds. In their souls? Perhaps the Fade, living here, had simply allowed them to imprint onto their remains in a method that went beyond what transpired at the Necropolis. This was not demonic and it was not a haunting, it was light and simplicity.

“Well… we can think on it later. I admit I have theories.”

“Oh my love, of course you do.”

From below there was a rattling scramble, boots on wood, and the guttural rasping cry of Manfred.

"Knew it!! Saw you!! Missed you!"

[daizedndconfused]

You wouldn't happen to be open to doing a cole x reader where they are asked by wu to train the ninja (because there extremely flexible and skilled) and they end up beating all of them without using many weapons would you??? Mehehehe I love your writing and cole is so Under Appreciated (people should give him so more love!!) and you portray his character so well thank you thank you :3

new girl

a/n - hi lovely!! tysm for the request and kind words hello?!! also loved this request we love us a strong girl hahaha i kinda drew some inspo from our icon ty lee. this lowkey ended up being longer than i thought but SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG SOME RANDOM SICKNESS WAS KICKING MY ASS ALL WEEK??? but we’re getting better now hahaha (also totally agree give my boy cole some love he deserves it) anyways enjoy i hope i did your vision some justice honestly if you want me to make a pt 2 i sooo can with some more one on one moments

characters - cole x reader

type - fluff!!

warnings - just some mild violence in the form of sparring

synopsis - the ninja a relying too much on their elemental powers and master wu needs some help reminding them of what’s really important who better to teach them than you??

“Breathe,” your mother reminded you gently.

Easy for her to say, she wasn’t the one suspended in a middle-split between two rocks over a stream. Regardless, you did as she asked, feeling the air move in and out of your lungs and the sweat forming on your temple.

“The key is concentration–balance,” her voice came from the bank to your right.

Most of what she said you already knew having been doing this for years, but you didn’t mind.

In and out your breaths went, eyes closed, relying only on your hearing until you felt your mother’s presence hovering next to you.

Peaking your eyes open, she stood on a nearby rock smiling down at you.

“Very good,” she nodded, offering you a hand to help you up.

“Thank you,” you exhaled, stretching out your legs a bit after so long in your previous position.

Your mother smoothed your hair back before leading you across the stream and back onto the land where you promptly shoved on your shoes.

The two of you chatted beneath the warm sun and cool breeze all the way back to your house. Though even before entering, you heard voices coming from within.

You shared a look of confusion with your mother.

That was odd, your father should be the only one home at the moment.

You gently pushed the door open and followed the voices to your living room where you saw your father in a deep conversation with an older man.

“Wu!” Your mother chirped, rounding you to greet the stranger.

The old’s eyes crinkled as he smiled beneath his long wispy white beard. Your mother bowed slightly as a sign of respect, and you thought it only best to do the same.

Eventually, you all sat around the living room, each nursing a steaming cup of tea.

“What do we owe this visit?” Your mother asked kindly. Apparently your parents and Master Wu went way back. They learned all they knew from the man himself, which then trickled down to you.

Wu took a sip of tea before answering. “I wish to offer your daughter a job.”

All eyes moved to you.

A job? What kind of job?

Your back straightened slightly at all the attention. “Sir?”

Wu sighed wearily, “I have realized I may need more help than I currently have. Upon opening a tea shop, I have less and less time to teach my students.” He swirled his tea twice before his eyes set upon you. “Would you be open to helping out?”

“Oh, uh… your students are?” You trailed off.

“The ninja, dear,” your mother filled in gently.

Oh. The ninja? What could you possibly teach the ninja? Sure, martial arts was nothing new, and yeah you were trained in combat thanks to your father, but they had elemental powers for heaven's sake.

“I’m not sure how much help I could be,” you answered sheepishly.

“You do not need special abilities to teach,” Wu smiled. “And I fear the elements are why I am seeking this help in the first place. It appears my students are disregarding their training for their elemental powers.”

That made sense. Whenever you got frustrated while training with your father he always reminded you you didn’t need flashy powers to be strong. Because while they may be useful, there’s always a chance they can vanish, and then what?

Eventually you made up your mind. “Okay, I’ll do it.” You quickly looked to your parents, “If that’s alright with you?”

“Of course,” your mother wrapped her arms around you. “We know you’re in safe hands with Wu. Just promise you’ll call?”

“Of course,” you assured her as your father also joined in on saying goodbye.

Before long you were packed with enough things to last a few weeks. You might have to repeat some outfits for a while since the duration of your stay wasn’t specified. But you always had money you could spend on clothes.

“How do we get there?” You asked Master Wu after he informed you he and his students were residing at his tea shop, Steep Wisdom.

He glanced at you out the corner of his, and you just caught the glint of a smirk beneath his beard before golden particles started to form in front of you.

From those particles, something even greater arose. A dragon.

Your mouth gaped open. Wu laughed before tossing your luggage on top of the large white and gold dragon that had just materialized in front of you.

--

The dragon flight was frightening at first, but as you relaxed it wasn’t so bad. You got to see things from an all new perspective. Dragon-eye view style.

Eventually, through the clearing of teas you flew over, you spotted a cozy tea house nestled between the woods.

The dragon dipped lower and lower before let out a warning, “The dragon dissolves, can you stick the landing?”

“Of course,” you smiled. A drop from this height? Easy.

You prepared yourself, but the disappearance of the dragon beneath you still caught you off guard a bit. However, that didn’t stop you from landing perfectly on your feet.

Flawless, you thought as your luggage somehow landed just as gracefully next to you.

The space around you truly was beautiful. A wall surrounded the tea shop and courtyard, and you heard rushing water faintly in the distance, telling you there was some type of natural water nearby.

What you didn’t notice was the five boys lingering outside upon your arrival.

“Uh, anyone gonna introduce us?” A slightly high pitched voice asked.

You snapped your gaze away from the scenery and towards the voice. Five boys around your own age and dressed in colorful gis regarded you curiously.

Before you could introduce yourself, Wu cut in. “This is your new strength trainer. She’ll be taking over lessons when I’m busy. I expect each of you to treat her with respect.”

A course of “Yes, Sensei’s” were said before the bowed in unison.

Then, an older woman with a long braid falling down her back summoned Wu. Something about an inventory issue.

“Excuse me,” he said to you, and then to his students, “someone will need to show her to her new quarters.”

With that he was gone. And you were left with five teenage boys staring at you.

“Um, hi I’m (Y/N). Nice to meet you.” You stuck with a polite introduction.

“Hey there,” a brunette boy with somewhat spiky hair said. “You know we don’t usually get many new people, may you and I could–”

“Kai,” a tall boy with black hair, cut him off. “Don’t be weird. She just got here.”

“What?” Kai gaped. “I was just going to ask if–”

“I apologize for my brother.” This time the voice came from… a titanium robot? Now that’s something you don’t see everyday.

Clearly the surprise was written all over your face at the unanimous chuckle that came from each boy.

“I am Zane,” the robot didn’t seem phased by your surprise. “This is Kai, Jay, Cole, and Lloyd. Kai’s sister also resides with us, but I’m afraid she is busy helping Misako and Master Wu.”

“Oh, that’s no problem,” you responded. “Do one of you know where I’m staying? If I don’t unpack now I’ll never get it done.” You admitted with a laugh.

“I got it,” said the boy with black hair you now knew to be Cole. He walked over, and grabbed each of your bags as though they weighed nothing.

“You don’t have to do that, I can take some of them. I know they’re a little heavy but no one told me how long I’d be staying.”

“Please,” Cole smirked, “it’s nothing. I can lift more than ten times this weight.”

“Show off,” Kai coughed.

“You okay?” Lloyd asked him.

“Yeah just something caught in my throat,” Kai shook his head before coughing the phrase again.

Cole rolled his eyes at Lloyd and Jay laughed. Zane didn’t seem to get it. You even found yourself smiling at the joke before following Cole to your room.

“Don’t mind them,” he said. “They can be a lot sometimes.”

“Something tells me you also fit into that category,” you teased. You are who you hangout with afterall. Though it wasn’t always true, it seemed fitting for this situation.

“I guess you’ll just have to find out won’t you?” Cole joked, looking back at you over his shoulder.

Eventually the two of you climbed a set of stairs hidden in the back of the tea shop. Upstairs was a small apartment looking room with multiple sets of doors, one of them being your own room.

It was a decent size, about the same as the one you had back home, with plenty of closet space.

“It’s not much I know,” Cole said, “but there’s been worse places we’ve stayed trust me.”

“No it’s perfect,” you insisted. “I don’t need a whole lot to get by.”

Cole nodded, setting your stuff down. “There’s two bathrooms, the boys and I share the one on the left, and you’ll be sharing with Nya on the right.”

You nodded, looking around your new room, thinking of all the ways you could make it look homier. Cole didn’t say anything more, but he didn’t leave either. He simply stood in your doorframe, looking at you, looking at your bare room.

“What?” You asked him, smiling.

“Nothing,” he shook his head with a grin. “Sorry, I’ll let you get settled in.”

You wanted to tell him it was no problem, but he vanished before you could. Out of all the boys you had just met, was the best looking in your eyes.

Shiny black hair, tall, and built like the mountains he commanded. Your new job was off to a good start already.

It was well into the evening when you finally met Nya. She sighed thankfully at the sight of you. She loved her brother, and she didn’t have any problems with the boys. They were all equally respectful, but other than Misako she had no other girls to talk to.

You too were happy for another girl to talk to. There was only so much testosterone someone could be around.

The two of you got along quickly as you offered to stock some shelves with her. Even though you were technically here to train the ninja, you weren’t due to start until the next day.

Your alarm woke you up at six thirty sharp. You know you weren’t supposed to start with the boys until eight that morning, but you wanted to get an early start on your first day before you got lazy.

Passing your way to the bathroom, you ran through your morning routine groggily before you headed downstairs to make yourself a cup of tea to wake you up.

Scanning the shelves for something that looked appetizing for the early morning, you didn’t even hear someone approach you from behind.

“I personally like this one,” a familiar voice said from behind you before a hand shot out and grabbed a case off one of the shelves just a hair too high for you to reach.

You jump slightly, startled by the person’s presence.

Spinning around, you saw the voice and arm belonged to Cole. He was smiling softly at you, a case of green tea in his hands. He too held the appearance of just waking up–tousled hair, sleepy eyes, and the lack of a shirt with black plaid pajama pants.

You quickly averted your eyes from his bare chest and instead found refuge in his earth eyes.

“Why green?” You blurted. It was the only question you could think of at this moment. And maybe it would distract him from the fact you were ogling him just a bit.

“Helps with energy,” he shrugged, tossing the case up in one hand. “I’ll start the kettle.”

It took you an embarrassingly long time to follow him to the back of the tea shop where a small kitchen resided.

He filled the kettle up with water and placed it on the stove before taking a seat at the island next.

“I’d make you some breakfast, but I’m afraid it wouldn’t be edible and that’s not the first impression I want you to have of me.” Cole laughed sheepishly.

You laughed with him before you took it upon yourself to scope out the fridge.

“How do you feel about omelets?” You asked after finding multiple cases of eggs. With this many ingredients you would be able to feed the whole team.

“I’m down,” he nodded.

You closed the fridge slightly before you saw a slip of paper taped to the front. It seemed to be a list of written chores, and at the bottom written in all capital letters next to a star were the words, ‘COLE IS NOT ALLOWED IN THE KITCHEN UNSUPERVISED.’

“Jeez, what’d you do?” You giggled, gesturing to the paper.

The boy flushed slightly, shrugging his broad shoulders before saying, “You set fire to the oven one time and suddenly you’re untrustworthy.” He rolled his eyes.

“Funny how that works.”

“Hilarious.” He deadpanned.

“Well since you can’t help with the food why don’t you just grab anything you want to add to the eggs, help me find the pans, and I’ll take care of the cooking part.” You suggested.

“That I can do,” he slipped off the stool.

Even though he wasn’t helping with the actual breakfast, the two of you worked in harmony together. He’d hand you the spatula, chop some vegetables, and give you some spices upon request. However, when you thought you could trust him with cracking an egg and he ended up getting it all over his bare torso you took it upon yourself to tie a black apron around him.

“Seriously?” He laughed as you tied the knot around his waist.

“Yup,” you nodded. “Damn. I’d need a magnifying glass to find your waist.”

He tipped his head back and laughed as you returned to flipping omelets with a smirk.

At this point you had successfully made two cups of tea, and three omelets. On the fourth, you were starting to grow more confident.

“Think I could flip it without a spatula?” You asked.

“No,” Cole shook his head, now seated on the island behind you.

“No faith,” you gasped, offended.

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” he shrugged, leaning back on his palms.

“Oh yeah?” You challenged before grasping the pan handle with both hands. You’d never done this before, but how hard could it be really? The answer was not very as you successfully tossed up an omelet and caught it gently on the other side.

You cheered, victorious as Cole also encouraged you, both laughing all the way.

Eventually, more and more people started waking up, and the more competent ones (Zane) began to help you with breakfast.

By the time eight in the morning rolled around, breakfast had been done, dishes were washed, and you were gathered in the courtyard with each of the ninja. Wu had given you the rundown of what he’d like you to work on with his students, and that’s exactly what you’d do.

“So,” you said, shaking the jitters out of your hands. “I’m thinking I’ll just spar one on one with each of you to see what you need to work on. Okay?”

The boys traded uneasy glances. “Are you sure?” Jay asked.

You smiled a little at their apprehension. “Yes, I’m positive. We’re just sparring, remember. But don’t hold back, otherwise it’s just a waste of time.”

“Yeah, you get your ass handed to you by Nya all the time, this shouldn’t be different.” Cole patted Jay on the back.

The others laughed at Jay’s blush and he grumbled something inaudible under his breath.

“Okay Jay, since you’re so worried you’re up first.” You waved him over. “Sensei said no powers.”

“Right,” Jay nodded as he approached you slowly.

“I’m not gonna bite you, Jay.”

“I know that!” He defended as the boys behind him howled with laughter.

You couldn’t help but tease him as the two of you got into a fighting stance.

You dug your feet into the ground and steadied your breathing. The key to combat was focus, controlled breathing, and anticipation. At least that’s what your father told you.

It was no surprise to you that Jay attacked quickly. He was the master of lightning afterall. However, that was what made him so predictable.

He’d throw a series of quick jabs that you avoided with grace. With each attack you’d be just an inch out of reach. Jay was quick–but you were quicker.

You didn’t notice it, but the chatter was nonexistent, and Jay was wholly focused on sparring. Though the sweat building on his forehead, and his attacks slowing were also becoming more prominent.

He threw a high kick in there this time, which was just what you were waiting for. The second his foot came off the ground, you moved to the side, grabbed his ankle, and with your own leg, swept his balancing leg off the ground causing him to fall straight onto his back.

Jay landed with a wheeze, but you helped him up just as quickly. “Your attacks are precise, but they’re sloppy. You try to cram in a lot of combined attacks and hope for the best. If you slow them down a bit you’re more likely to land a few.”

Kai ‘Ohed’ from the sidelines. “You didn’t even get one hit dude.”

Jay glared at him as he took a seat beside Lloyd.

“And you won’t either, your turn.” You pointed to Kai.

The others laughed, but Kai rose, determination clear on his face.

You got into position again, but this time you’d change up your evasion techniques. Since he spent the previous match observing you he no doubt knew some of your moves.

Kai fought more aggressively than Jay, but with less accuracy making him easier to avoid. You twirled around him after a hard punch threw him off balance slightly. With your backs to each other, you only had a moment to grab his arm, crouch, shift your weight, and flip his body over yours.

Kai landed as hard as Jay.

After explaining his problem to him, you called up Zane next. You wanted to get the analyzing robot out of the way before you completely ran out of cards to play.

You had to admit, Zane almost got you, but you quickly threw yourself from his reach with a well timed aerial over his shoulder. Just as you landed he threw a punch, but you were ready for that. You crouched the moment you landed, and swept both his legs.

Standing quickly, you had just enough time to catch the front of his gi, suspending him above the floor ever so slightly. You felt a bit bad–you didn’t want to dent him after all.

Lloyd whistled, impressed, as he was finally called to the stand.

Lloyd, the green ninja. You knew he would also be pretty difficult, but it was like you were in a trance at the moment. You weren’t about to lose your winning streak, were you?

Being as flexible as you were didn’t hurt either. Sure the ninja were pretty flexible, but you could contort yourself into the most uncomfortable positions making it easy to avoid each of the ninja's blows.

All you had to do was wait until they tired themselves out, and then deliver the final blow. It was almost as if they were fighting themselves.

Lloyd looked concentrated, but his stance was off slightly. You feinted one way, and he fell for it easily, shifting all his weight onto one side of his body to prepare for the hit he thought was coming. Instead, you spun and shoved your shoulder hard into the opposite side of his body.

Lloyd crumbled like a house of cards.

When the green ninja retreated with a defeated look on his face, you were left with only one ninja now.

You suspected because of his height, Cole would be slow and off balance, but you were wrong. He was sturdy, and his height only added to his balance if anything. You’ve fought people bigger and stronger than you all the time, bad unlucky for him they only went down one way.

After a while of going through your song and dance of avoidance once again, Cole laughed.

“You’re slippery, huh?” He joked.

You winked before sliding between his legs, kicking the back of his knees and then once more between his shoulder blades to send him tumbling down to the ground.

“Wu was right,” you huffed, wiping the sweat from your forehead. “You guys rely way too much on your powers.”

“Alright, cough it up, where’d you learn that?” Jay asked.

“Learn what?” You laughed, helping a grumpy Cole from the floor.

“You flip around so much I got sick from just looking at you!” Jay whined.

“Lots of practice and some time in the cirque,” she shrugged.

“Like the circus?” Cole asked, looking down at you.

“Not the stuff with the tent and the animals,” you clarified. “More like the Cirque Du Soleil shows, you know? Anyway, I did a lot of acro as a kid. Made it easy to learn combat.”

“That’s awesome,” Kai said. “Have you ever juggled fire?”

“I told you, it’s not the tent type of circus,” you laughed. “It’s classier than that. That’s besides the point, you all have work to do. Lucky for all of you we’re going to start with yoga today! Just as a warm up.”

You giggled behind your hand at the unanimous groan coming from all five boys.

[the-thieves-gambit]

That earned a well-deserved eye roll but it was quickly gone with a chuckle as she heard his laugh. Listening, she could see the park before her, and gave occasional little sounds of confirmation to let him know that she was paying attention. "Sounds like you've been skipping leg day at the gym. You should start taking longer walks with Dolly. Might meet some more interesting people than me to bother on your days off." It was a small implanted suggestion that she hoped he would take into consideration.

"I know all you boys have your secrets. I know the CIA's and the Air forces in Nevada and I know you boys have your small subsection as well." Her time in Vegas came to mind and the finger one of the agents, a regular at the club she was dancing at, twitched at the memory of it. Though it had healed well, it still bothered her when the weather was cold and she couldn't fold it completely when making a fist. "If you do you might be partnered up with your Scully. If you are, I will need an invite to the wedding, after all, it was my idea that led you there, so you're welcome future Wally."

At hearing Wally, Dolly nuzzled against Elizabeth's chin wanting to listen in and let out a small ruff at the words he said. With a giggle, she put it on speaker mode so the pup could hear him clearer. "I should be thanking her for the company. And you for letting me watch her. The days seem to be flying by with her around. and she gives me an excuse to finally go exploring around the island like I wanted to." There was something to be said about the way that he was willing to talk about anything else than what she knew would be the biggest thorn in her side while trying to get the office ready for her to leave. So she let herself be distracted by him talking about his day. Letting a groan out at the simple mistakes some people made.

"I'm always preparing, there's a difference. It's like the condom motto, it's better to have one and not need it than to need it and not have it." Cuddling against Dolly she added. "Dolly's different and you know it." Rolling her eyes she added. "Yes, I know they jump, but its better than being kicked by hind legs of a powerful animal or be thrown from one."

Oh, now that was promising. “Well it’s been a while since I’ve been out there, this sounds like the perfect excuse to travel for a bit.” Settling into a kore comfortable position, she sighed. As much as she poked fun at him for being tired, the recent uptake on hikes and walks with Dolly around was tiring her too. “Thanks for that. Can’t believe you were thinking about my case while working on yours.”

Hearing the all-familiar tone of a video call, she shifted around so she was still cuddling Dolly but she had become all too conscious about the fact that she was wearing his sweater. Hoped the fact that she was holding the phone out so Dolly was in front of her would help hide it. Knowing him, he would see it and use it as an excuse to tease her about possibly missing him, which she didn't. She only wore it because it was the coziest thing she had at the moment, he hadn't lied when he talked about how soft it was. It felt like a lot like a hug.

After settling into a position, she let it switch over and it took a moment to adjust seeing how much darker it was on his end. His green eyes shone like twinkling emerald stars, taking her off guard for a second. "The Roosevelt, she only lived there for a very short period of time. If anything she'd be at the Brentwood estate she was found at. I don't know why people can't let that poor woman be. She suffered enough when she was alive." Magnus was an old Hollywood lover and would waste no moment to show her the old movies or tell her what he knew about them. Most of her aliases came from those old movies. The laugh was a small one, it wasn't at him but at the idea of that hallway having a poltergeist. "If that were the case we would all already have one attached to each of us, this planet has been spinning for so long that if everyone became ghosts, by now we would all have one."

It felt like the lighthouse all over again, questions she thought she would be asked or had ever thought about before, that somehow only felt like a Wally thing. Whether it be the agent training or the curiosity he seemed to have, she would indulge for now, he had after all let his dog stay with her. Pondering the question over a moment, she thought about all the times that she thought she saw her dad in places over the years in her travels. When visiting parks that they had visited, mostly in California which he always loved. She remembered Jennifer telling him once that he might be John Muir reincarnated. With a sigh, she replied. "I read once that ghosts are a lot things to people. That sometimes they are a daydream or guilt or anger or even a memory. I think sometimes people wish for someone to be around so much that they can conjure their own ghosts. But," she laughed. "I also come from people who believe in fairies and merpeople and trolls, and ghosts too. So I think it would be silly for me to say that they don't exist in a way. And I guess you obviously do or else we wouldn't be having this conversation, right?"

There was that bit of hair that seemed to always be in his face when he let his hair down. She wanted to reach out and tuck behind his ear as she had before he left but couldn't. "Hey," there was something about not being able to look into his eyes unobstructed that seemed to bother her at the moment. "Sorry, but ," she pointed towards her face as if to mimic the tucking motion. "Can you... I don't know why but it's bugging me." It was then that she realized, as the memory of the last time he was there came back that not only was she sleeping in his hoodie, he had slept in her bed and she was cozying up to his dog while on the phone with him. Something strange stirred in her, but she ignored it chalking it up to just being tired. He'd fall asleep before she did though if she kept him talking. "So what's on the agenda for tomorrow?"

He grinned even though she couldn't see him he still did it. "I was getting to the hello just needed to catch you off guard first." His laughter was easy going and flowed like a river. "A National Park, not just any old one. Lassen Volcanic National Park. The meadows were freckled with wildflowers and those lakes are so crystal clear. I mean, I know I wasn't there for the sights but it was refreshing to see a familiar sight to home. Water wise anyway." He sighed and shook his head. "Truly unexpected way to start Monday morning with hearing grab your boots we going hiking. My legs are killing me though."

Hearing Liz on the other side of the call made him smile. He knew he'd missed her but it didn't click just how much until he heard her voice and consequently her teasing banter. He rolled his eyes as he chuckled and sighed. "He wishes he was this cool. Actually, we do have a UFO department did you know that? Fun fact of the night. I may just request a transfer. Thank you for the reminder. Alien life expert." Wally couldn't help but laugh at his own lame joke.

Getting the picture of his pup made him smile as he chuckled and talked to Dolly knowing she could hear him. "There's my precious girl." he cooed and saved the picture. "Thank you again for keeping her company. She looks very happy and very well loved." That pause made him open his eyes and frown. "That bad huh?" He wasn't sure if it was the tone of her voice or that pause that gave it away to him but he picked up on something in her voice. "For what its worth im glad you got my furry best friend to at least get a smile out of you." His dog was good at that. "Timezones you say, huh it's the first I'm hearing about it."

"Oh that tells me you have not had a moment to sit. Manoa Falls? It has a pretty name. Tell me about it. What did you like the most? A guard dog? Has she already found her new calling? Is this your way of breaking it to me? I'm glad that she's been having a ball of a week so far. I hope that when people asked if she was yours you said yes." He wouldn't have minded it either. Dolly took to Liz so he knew the dog liked her.

Wally sighed and knew that cop bullies usually tended to set their sights on a new target, the ones that came after them first. "I'm sorry. If there's anything I can do let me know." Just by the sound of her voice he knew she didn't want to dwell on this so he switched the topic. "Messy for sure. It turned out that the sheriff for the county lost the paperwork so Sunday when I landed had me at the station waiting for seven hours to see one page of a report that someone actually had saved. The rest needed to be requested from the San Diego office. Not only that but they had three suspects that all had alibis but stories didn't align correctly. So, now we have to trace all three of their footsteps. First guy had us at the National Park. The other was the aquarium and the last one which is my least favorite will have us at a strip club talking to some of the employees there. All this because no one thought to pull fingerprints. One deputy touched a bloody cloth with his hands." Wally sighed. "Upside is that they're all cooperating."

"Why are you so sure that Wildfire will hate you? Do you not trust me? If I had a doubt that she'd hurt you I wouldn't even have you consider this. It'll be like when you met Dolly. Wildfire will fall in love with you. Its not hard to do you know?" he rolled his eyes and laughed. "You are always thinking worst case scenarios. A pony? We can put you on ponies but technically Wildfire is a baby. You're scared of a little baby." His laughter wasn't mean spirited just amused. "It is a ranch. Fine we are adding feeding goats to the list. They jump up just FYI."

His sleepy little laughter rung out and nodded against his pillow. "Mhmm. The big old circle isn't there anymore but that's because city didn't let them build it. Said it was too big. But still there." Her laughter made him hum in content as he had forgotten how melodic a sound it was. "It's actually a funny story. The guy you were looking is friends with suspect number two. They just didn't put two and two together until I saw the report."

Wally switched to video as he had missed seeing her face but could use the pretense of seeing Dolly. He smiled sleepily as his eyes were the only thing visible. "They said it was Marilyn Monroe's ghost but I know that's false. She haunts the Roosevelt and we're so far away from that hotel. I think it's a poltergeist, might be, I hear rustling more than I see any figures pop up. I'm not scared," a little lie. "I just don't fuck with them. What if you inadvertently piss them off because you step on their favorite spot on the floor? And then you have one hanging on you and you have no idea how to begin to apologize." Shaking his head his eyes sparkled with amusement as he moved slightly so his long bang would fall to the side inside of on top of his eye. "Do you believe in them?"

[diamondkat]

Regarding Alastor being redeemed, I have been seeing some posts regarding how it can happen that trigger an instant ick reaction from me. I have taken time to think about why I keep having such a strongly negative reaction to it. The first thing I took into consideration is that I really do not want my current favourite bad boy to become good. I am first and foremost a villain fan and his becoming good has a high chance of ruining the character for me. This means that there is a chance that I would dislike any theory that ends with Alastor redeemed. A lot of time you see people making arguments for why a ship or character should not be liked when the real reason is they personally don't like it and the reasons are merely support. I try to make sure I am aware of my personal bias.

Regardless of my personal bias, I have decided that there is one particular theory regarding how Alastor can be redeemed that I hate from the bottom of my heart. It is the theory where Alastor after being humiliated, degraded and losing everything including his pride has no choice but to accept Charlie's care and change for the better. Sometimes it involves betraying the hotel first, but generally involves him being unable to deal with the challenges that he faces. I am sure how this works in the minds of those who like this theory makes perfect sense. He can no longer rely on himself, he sees that he isn't capable of anything and now has no choice but to become what Charle wants him to be. I hate it so much. I have kept turning it over in my mind and I think I have figured out all the reasons why separate from my bias.

First, suffering doesn't make people better. It just doesn't. The theory seems to require enough suffering to rewrite Alastor's personality and make him Charlie's puppet. It also reminds me of William Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew. The story of how the proud woman was broken down to make her obedient. She might be "better" but it also felt to me like she died and became a puppet. He would be "redeemed" but that wouldn't be Alastor. It would just be something that looks like him. I just feel like fans of Alastor who like this theory don't realise that he would lose everything that pulled them to him in the first place if this happened. Some could not deal with him being less energetic in the main show than the pilot due to him being bored. How would they deal with what would essentially be a hollow creature wearing his face trying to become good because there is nothing left in him?

Second, with a proud character you can't brute force them into letting people in. Part of the idea of the theory is that after he is humiliated and suffers in front of them, he will drop his smile and be forced to let others in. That doesn't make sense to me. We have already seen in S1E8, how Alastor deals with things not going his way. He holds onto what little control he has by refusing to drop his smile and holding onto his pride while going through a breakdown. The best way to get someone like Alastor as far as I am concerned is to deal with him the same way you would deal with a wild animal. Slowly lower their guard. I think Charlie is already doing that whether Alastor knows it or not. Besides, pride is an important part of the character. Pride is part of what drew me to the character in the first place. The kind of pride that makes a person think it is okay to say, "If I wanted to hurt anyone here I would have done so already" in front of the Princess of Hell, is part of what drew me to Alastor. If he lost it, the character would likely immediately lose all appeal to me. So, there is some personal bias there.

It would make sense to me if the theory was more about Alastor learning that he can rely on others and doesn't have to depend solely on himself which leads to him opening up and letting others in. However, the theory leans very heavily into suffering as a way to make him a better person and a complete erasure of everything that makes up the character through suffering to make him into someone who wants and is worthy of redemption. That's fine for fanfiction but I hope it never becomes canon.

[glitterguts13]

https://www.webmd.com/baby/what-is-cryptic-pregnancy

I want to read about a character giving birth without realizing they were even pregnant.

I'm not settled on a specific character, so you can pick from one of these pairings (or if you're feeling ambitious/generous, more than one of them?)

Ex: Father/The One Giving Burth

Diluc/Kaeya, Zhongli/Childe, Alhaitham/Kaveh, Neuvillette/Wriothesley

I have another request lined up like this, but with all the genshin boys, so I'm just going to pick one pair to do a longer version here! I don't have much Diluc/Kaeya so I'm choosing them!

"Seriously?" Kaeya could feel his eye twitching in annoyance as Diluc hovered over him, sharp eyes watching from the doorway. Sweat dripped down the back of his neck, his stomach lurking as another wave of nausea overtook him.

"I told you not to drink so much."

"Shut the fuck u-" Kaeya jolts forward, barely making it to the toilet before more watery bile burns his throat, "I haven't had anything to drink today...not for a few days, in fact."

Raising an eyebrow in disbelief, Diluc doesn't respond, only wetting a washrag and passing it to Kaeya.

"Told you..." Kaeya leaned back on his heels, swallowing thickly and groaning, "Food poisoning...I knew better than to trust Lisa's cooking..."

"If you aren't better by morning, I'm calling Barbara down to check on you." Kaeya waves his 'brother' off, kneading his knuckles into the aching muscles of his abdomen.

"I can handle the vomiting but these cramps...damn, they won't let up." Diluc offers a hand, helping Kaeya to his feet.

"Lay down, try to sleep it off." ~~~

The room is dark, silence filling the space between Kaeya's rapidly beating heart. It hurt, everything hurt, but mostly his stomach and hips. The ache is bone deep, the pressure mounting no matter how hard he tried to relieve himself. Food poisoning and constipation, what a winning combination.

"Kaeya..." sleep deep voice rumbling beside him, Diluc reaches out, giving his arm a squeeze, "You still up?"

Kaeya tries to smile, even though he knows Diluc can't see his face in the dark, but all he can do is moan.

"Kaeya?" sleep is replaced with urgency, the lamp next to their bed flickering on, "Kaeya- Shit, Kaeya!" the younger man blinks, confused. He knows he must look like shit, but Diluc sounds positively petrified.

"I'm getting Barbara-"

Kaeya struggles to sit upright, opening his mouth to protest when he finally sees the issue.

Blood.

Blotches of it cover the sheets between his legs, though he'd been too sweat-soaked to notice before. He swings his legs over the side of the bed, but the moment he stands, his body gives out. Crashing to the ground, the pain seemed to amplify as his anxiety took hold.

"D-don't go!" Kaeya calls out, trembling as Diluc gathers him into his arms.

"You're bleeding, why didn't you wake me up-"

Reaching for Diluc's shirt, Kaeya grips it tight.

"Pants- off-!!" confused, Diluc pulls the fluid-soaked garments down around Kaeya's ankles.

"Coming...push, fuck-" his brain is firing in every direction, fear overriding sense, instinct toppling reason. The pain was sinking lower, that pressure building embarrassingly low. To hell with it all, better to be humiliated than dead.

He gives a tentative push, crying out as something hard pokes at his hole. The tight muscles stretch, Diluc gasping in horror.

"Kaeya- Kaeya why didn't you tell me-?!" he lays his 'brother' onto the floor, adrenaline rushing through him as he spies the head bulging. There isn't time to act before it's popping free, slipping with ease into his hands as Kaeya gave a single, desperate push.

"Shit- Shit, Kaeya, Shit shit shit!!!" he can barely bring himself to look, good eye going wide as Diluc cradles a squawling bundle to his chest.

"You should have told me!" he shouts, eyes burning with fear and anger. Kaeya swallowed, choking on emotion.

"I didn't...know-"