#i thought the basic tortured lab experiment story | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

nomsfaultau · 10 months ago

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Daily ask №23

Story summaries edition!

1. Do any of your family or irl friends or colleagues actually know about your fics? About the plot? How did you explain it to them?

2. When anybody asks you about what Fault is, how do you tend to summarise it?

3. If the characters were asked what they think a story about their life would be like, would they give an accurate response? It's like that meme where one character thinks they're in a comedy while another thinks they're in a psychological horror. Just for the funsies please include the foundation guys as well.

4. What genre would you consider Fault to be?

5. If the fault crew had to write a story about themselves, how well would they do it? Not a story about their life necessarily, just with them as the main character.

Ah literal meta let’s go

1.The answer to this question entails a lot of personal growth on my own end as someone who tends to feel pointless shame about the things I like and tend to keep it private. It was months into writing Fault before I talked about it to my partner in crime, very much in a word vomit soup for hours and hours once I actually opened my mouth. I talk about it all the time with him, though he won’t reading because reading is for nerds lmao. He knows everything but the timeline is squiggly to him. Fault is also 100% his Fault since he’s the one that introduced me to Technoblade and SCPs. Then a few years later I met a buddy who I thought I’d only know for two weeks and so felt more open to ramble about it with them, though completely using codenames for all the characters. Alas she somehow has the determination to maintain a long distance relationship with me despite the fact I’m abysmal with it. So like the discord rp screen shots? I had to edit their names back in from ‘Dadgon’ and ‘bee kid’ and ‘Mr. Fluffy’. She fully knows by now but other people in the server don’t. Still, her being so open about adoring the things she likes gave me the confidence to be less private about my artistic endeavors.

So now my parents have the ao3 link. I don’t think they were necessarily surprised I was writing given my self published novella, or fic specifically since my mom asked about it once like a year before I started Fault. Dad will proudly explain plot points at family reunions and fully uses she/her pronouns for Tubbo in a move still baffling Foundation researchers to this day. Mom and I discuss the philosophy of characters sometimes. Much beyond that is risky to my financial support due to the queer elements. It’s a somewhat surreal experience in some senses, such as meeting my dad’s roommate for the first time and learning he’s read a few chapter of Fault, or a very confused but enthusiastic uncle trying to explain to me how I could start monetizing it ? They have absolutely no context for any characters, but my sbi-brain rot roommate definitely does and tries to shake me by the shoulders to allow a modicum of fluff. And then like a year and a half ago I made a Tumblr and started talking about it in a more anonymous way that’s made me more comfortable with sharing my thoughts.

My Dad actually follows this blog. Hi Dad.

2.I doooooon’t. Like God where would I start. I suppose if I’m being reductionist I call it a 12 year old’s evil government torturing the cool lab experiment OCs standard plot. Sometimes I refer to it as smacking moral philosophies together like action toys. The action/plot isn’t necessarily the point, since Fault is mostly focused on the internal journey of the characters. An exploration of guilt and trauma, in its simplest terms.

3.The Blade fully thinks they’re in a shonen anime where they can solve stuff with the power of friendship. The Blood God is basically Naruto’s nine tailed fox thing probably if you think about it trust. Philza is in a hurt/comfort and everything that happened in the Foundation is backstory and now they’re onto the healing and recovering and found family part. Tubbo thought they were in a jailbreak leading to an overthrow the dystopia plot line but that’s gone wonky. Upon getting powers Tommy decided (rather forcefully) that he was in a superhero film, and now thinks he’s in hell. Wilbur lives each day like he’s in a slasher with Jason getting ever closer if he doesn’t book it.

Dr. Blake thinks she’s in a horror story and will do anything to be the final girl. This is barely exaggerating. Webb is in a…political plot line..? Faustian plot? Where he has to protect the world via careful contracts and conversations to control the devil. Rosalind thought she was stopping a dystopia before her ‘are we the baddies?’ moment and transitioned into I have no mouth and I must scream OR the candyman according to my comment section. Jasmine’s in a fairytale where she got turned into a fairy. Rhodes was in a domestic slice of life until he got shoved into a dystopia. Lawrence is in a dnd backstory where he joins the guild that fights of goblins or whatever it is ransacking the town. Except whuh woe the goblins have Feelings.

Also the comedy/psychological horror divide is Charlie and Maureen.

4. Grimdark urban-fantasy drama with some action/adventure and horror elements.

5.Tommy makes himself the most OP bestest coolest hottest funniest Mary sue ever. Heavy escapist elements. This is just what Tommy would naturally do if asked to write a book even without the requirement in the ask. Tubbo would be a lot more subtle about it, but MC Tubbo would Always Be Right and everyone Listens to them. MC Tubbo is the leader of the friend group and the books are very slice of life chill stuff. MC Wilbur is similar on the leader portion, but on a much larger scale, barely controlling a turbulent empire. Its portrayal of a fantasy society is seen as alienating, threatening, and very creative, almost absurdist satire. Castle intrigue plot filled with lots of scheming, though most characters are kinda cartoonishly evil. The Blade is proud to present Normal Human Theodore Blade (or The Blade for short) who is just One Of the Guys and can fit inside houses. It’s an adventure comedy and the voices are used exclusively for dark humor but are never a real problem, and The Blood God doesn’t exist. Philza’s would be the most abstract. He’s less the main character and more the narrator, in the way classic books have to have a real character they can use to know about events and serve as an omniscient narrator without necessarily being the lead role. MC Philza is some type of historian or archeologist as a framing device, and the reader only gets to know him via narrator bias, snippets of comments, and footnotes. His book is a hectic collection of short stories spanning tens of thousands of years, each with little connection to the other. It’s praised for the realism, not the plot.

#fault au #sbi scp au #Wlwdwtys ask #Ask #something to nom on

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sgtapollo · 1 year ago

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!FAKE BODY WARNING!

New poptropica oc just dropped!

(please don't mind the uncoloured chains....)

His name is Metal Jones, as you can see from the text he voluntereally became a lab rat just to become a cyborg.

As im making him, i'm also making a fan made island(idk what it's called yet) to fit his story.

The story idea of the island is:

!THE STORY WILL HAVE SOME SENSITIVE TOPICS LIKE GORE AND HUMAN EXPERIMENTS/CRUELTY!

PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION

Basically in the island humans and robots live together but the humans are in more higher in command so the robots are enslaved by them.

Scientists wants to make a middle ground between humans and robots(for research and stuff) so they want to make a cyborg bc part man part robot, but the thing is there's no one who knows or who will willing to voluntereally be experimented on. So the scientists only plan is to go find homeless people or just people in need, at first they didn't have any luck of finding any needy people who would willingly get experimented on until they met Metal Jones.

They first saw him throwing up in the middle of the alleyway after getting kicked out of a bar, the scientists just straight up asked if he wants to be a lab rat. Jones was at first not convinced but when they mentioned that you will get taken care of there and will be provided with his needs, without any hesitant he agreed.

And when he was taken in they quickly did everything to him, to make him part robot they decided to chop off his limbs and replace them with mechanical ones. It should be as simple as that but they wanted more, they want him to be able to be fixed like how robots are.

They tortured him and "fixed him" over and over again until he is strong enough for the final test, which is cutting off his head to see if they can "fix him" again or not. Jones somehow survived this final test.

And after all of that he was finally able to come back to society again(which he somehow missed), but when he did the humans find him freakish and forced him to go away and go live with the robots.

But when he goes to the robots they all cheered for him and treated him differently, they treated him like some kind of deity. They thought that a human voluntereally agreeing to be part robot is a huge step in robots becoming one with the humans. And ever since then Jones sees himself higher than everyone else, he is also the first cyborg after all...

And that's all from Jones's lore, I might expand it and fix some writings in the story

#poptropica #please don't mind any spelling mistakes #if there's some plot holes #this is still sa concept for the story #poptropica oc

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fangirleaconmigo · 2 years ago

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You’ve probably gotten tons of asks about it already but are you going to make posts talking about the new season now or wait till part 2 comes out?

Hello dear! I tend to think and mull for a long time because my brain is slow.

If anyone wants my preliminary thoughts that are subject to change after seeing the rest of the season, here’s a few things:

SEASON THREE SPOILERS

Canon bi/pan bard is fantastic so far. It feels very natural, the emotions, the chemistry is there, very special and particular connections, etc.

Joey said he had a lot of input and it shows, because it does feel personal. I love it. Anyone who listened to my Whiskey with Witcher podcast interview knows that I’m a big fan of that development.

He also talked up Hugh Skinner and I was like well we shall see. People always talk up their scene partners because they know them and care about them which is GREAT but that doesn’t always actually translate to the screen for the viewer.

But Hugh WAS amazing. Joey was not exaggerating his expressiveness, passion, and chemistry in the role.

Hm. Let’s see what else.

I really appreciate that they haven’t ‘dropped’ the centrality of the Yen and Tissaia relationship. I’m not a fan of the Vilgefortz Tissaia romance addition. But at least they haven’t minimized how important her other relationships are.

Tissaia and Yen is the relationship that hooked me into the witcher to begin with. It had complications and dramatic tension and I was intrigued by how it changed the two women. It is so central to me, and I'm glad it still is for the show.

Ciri: It’s a whole new Ciri. Very different from the books. It’s not worse, it’s just different. In the books she just wanted to be left in peace and wanted nothing to do with being royalty or the motherhood and reproduction that this entails.

She has like a rage moment of almost riding into Nilfgaard at one point but she comes to her senses.

But the show cast her much older and this is just a different story. It’s about leadership. She wants to be a queen. Like I said. Very very different Ciri.

I have always believed you can change things you're adapting, in fact you have to. The test is, what you change it to has to be compelling enough in its own right that people aren't sitting there bitter about what they are missing out on. And I think her internal struggle and arc has potential. We'll see how it plays out the rest of the season.

The stuff about experimenting on the girls and messing with their heads and mushing their body parts into one is obviously brand new as well. I don’t really get it so far, but we’ll see how it plays out.

I believe it's ideas adapted from Season of Storms but I've only read that book one time, so I'll have to go look again.

The plot line has potential. Again, the story in the books was about bodily autonomy and the villains were all trying to basically turn girls and women into breeding machines. The lab was discovered and was horrific in a different way.

So what they’ve done is a bit more “fantasy” and I think it is potentially a much better choice for the kind of show they’re doing. I don't think I would want to see TWN put in a bunch of extreme and graphic reproductive and sexual violence and torture. I think you have to know the kind of show you're making and have a consistent tone. So I'm open to something else, for sure. But I’ll reserve judgment until I see how they wrap it up.

I loved all of the Ciri and Yen stuff. Their conversation and scenes are great. I know for a lot of people it's sort of hollow after S2. Since I made the decision not to quit the show, I have to let that go or I'll be miserable. So, I'm blocking out and denying a lot of season two.

Season three I'm enjoying. Yes, it's camp and silly in a lot of ways. Of course it's a flatter more simplistic version of the story. But we are on season three folks. If that is offensive to people, they should have quit already. Hatewatching is bad for the soul and constant hate and hostility is bad for the fandom. If ya can't have fun with it, time to move on.

For me, I had a great time watching it. I'm actually re-watching it already. I didn't rewatch season two at all (except for the first ep) so that's a good sigh already.

How I judge the season's writing as a whole will have to happen after the second part. And I'll let you know then if you send me another ask.

What I'm looking forward to the rest of the season:

The lodge. I think Cassie Clare is a fabulous Philippa but I want to see her come into her own self. I hope that's coming.

Keira Metz's brass knuckles.

FRINGILLA. We've seen so little of her so far, but what is there has intrigued me. Where are they going with her? I hope she's a bigger part of the last three eps.

MERIHART I want Philippa x Triss so badly ghhhhhh.

Milva. I can't wait to meet Milva.

Jaskier x Radovid I hope is a satisfying arc, and I believe it will be.

Geralt and Jaskier in Brokilon oh I hope they do it justice.

WILL WE SEE THE UNICORN??

Thanks for dropping into the ol ask box hun!

#the witcher #twn #the witcher season 3 #the witcher spoilers

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chicmntndie · 1 year ago

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Orestes

Since one person on my ask blog asked me about Orestes, I'm using it as an excuse to yack about Orestes.

I was at one point trying to write a fic about Orestes and his progression into insanity life but I currently have 5 long fics I'm editing or panic writing

I named Orestes from finding the name and thinking it would be a useful way to distinguish between the Orthos but upon looking into the name I discovered the Oresteia, a Greek play. After that, I started incorporating aspects of that story with Orestes because he was already pretty similar to the Orestes in the story

TW for mass murder, kidnapping, child/animal abuse, body modification (it's a robot, but still) and dark thoughts

Basic information:

Orestes and Idas are the code names of Ortho and Idia to protect their identity at school. Idas stands for Idia Digital Anima System

The parents shown in chapter 7 do not exist here, they are replaced by Agamemnon and Klytemnestra who are awful parents

Orestes' unique magic is Outline of your Suffering (The full incantation is "see the outline of your suffering, this was always going to happen) It's a quote from the Oresteia. It rips souls from living people and allows Orestes to move them. Overuse of it led Orestes to become able to reanimate bones, at the cost of even more intense blot.

The Timeline

At age 8, the Incident happens and Idia winds up dying

Ortho's parents become cold and Ortho, seeing that he's not wanted isolates himself in fear they may be psychically violent to him

His parents call him useless for only sitting around and not doing any work to help the family, saying they wish Ortho died instead and that the only way they'd love him is if he got his brother bacl.

Ortho begins experimenting on animals (he kills them and tries to resurrect them using his unique magic)

At age 9, Ortho begins kidnapping STYX researchers his parents send his way and experimenting on them

Around his 10th birthday, Ortho finishes the prototype of Idas and begins using him as a silent lab assistant. Idas is not very aware at this point.

At age 11, Ortho is given a torture room with a chamber for storing bodies and another for his experiments themselves

He also takes on the name Orestes when he is officially named heir to STYX to distance himself from his parents when they suggest a code name. From here forward in the timeline I will refer to him as Orestes.

At age 12, Idas is finished and this time he is actually aware. He continues to be a silent robot assistant because Orestes is worried if Idas has a voice bank he would question if Orestes is doing what's morally right. (Though in one version of this, I had Orestes rip out the voicebox of Idas either because it sounded too much like Idia or becuase Idas kept trying to help people escape and Orestes didn't want him crying for help)

Orestes begins using him in the actual experiments, which have kicked up a few notches

Orestes starts to get paranoid about Idas somehow leaking information to the researchers (he was) and begins to become insanely controlling of him.

Age 14, Orestes is sent to NRC because he's beginning to scare his parents.

He quietly continues his experiments.

When he turns 16, Orestes claims the housewarden title, freaking out just about everyone at the school.

Idas is now given the task of threatening or kidnapping students, which he hates.

Because they can't touch Orestes any other way, he is held back a year.

At 17, Idas gets banned from being on the campus other than Orestes' room and is trapped in there now as Orestes does his own dirty work.

Eventually, Orestes graduates and goes home to work for his internship. He is put in one of the highest positions.

An argument with his parents that resulted in one of them approaching him with a knife leads Orestes to overblot, using his magic to reanimate every skeleton in the whole facility to try to take control of STYX.

(It's also an attempt)

This story so far has an open ending, but any ideas in closing it are very much accepted!

Asks:

#orthoverse #ortho shroud #swap au #ignihyde #idia shroud

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moth-the-rp-cryptic · 2 years ago

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I want to do an overwatch rp with my oc

I'm willing to do a double up, ocxcc , ocxoc or just a fun story with no shipping!

Also ill ship My oc with any cc you are willing to play (I perfer roadhog, Ramattra, or junkrat. But ill take any chacter no matter the gender)

TW: abuse

Storyline:

Ace is a underground fighting "dog" a human that has been modified and basically torture to be a fighting "dog" for people's entertainment

One day he is found by (insert) and freed

The rp will follow him getting use to the outside world and living day to day

Also forming relationships something he never really did before

Idk I thought this could ge fun!

Dm me if you wanna try!

Charcter info

Name: ace oak (chosen name. Dead name deleted from everything)

Alias: muzzled mutt

Gender: male

Race: southern/ American

Appearance: every fluffy white hair, most the time coving eyes. Very pale skin and scary sharp teeth. A scars on the face and body from fighting

Personality: actually quite sweet, acts dumb, but actually isn't. He doesn't talk much; mostly just sits and watches people

DOB: ????????????

Height: 6'3"

Job: lab experiment/ fighting "dog"

Role: tank

Health Max:

Weapon: claws

Background/Bio: Ace was an experiment made by random nobodies to see if they could mix dna to create the perfect killer, ace is the perfect killer, stronger and faster. Much of Aces's years were spent in underground fighting, treated like an animal and forced to fight and kill others; junkrat was the one to find and free Ace. Ace doesn't really know what to do with his new freedom <can be edited this is just the original stroy

Ability 1: claw attack- will claw and cut at enemies

Ability 2 : tail whip- tail act like a whip and hits hard enough to throw people a little

Passive Ability : four-legged run- can run super

Ultimate Ability : feral rage- will rip off their muzzle and begin to attack and tear at people around them, causing "bleeding" out health for a few moments

---

Quotes/Interactions:

" My bark Is ALOT worse than my bite, baby doll"

"Well, Ain't you as sweet as a rotten lemon"

"Sorry, but My job is to crush you like a can, so I will!"

"Touch my healer again, and I'm breaking your windpipe."

"I'm not violent, just passionate!"

------

Junk: "Let's cause trouble!"

ace: "With pleasure firecracker."

------

roadhog: laughter "Hey there."

Ace: "Aw fancy meeting you here sugar, don't worry, when I'm done il kiss your booboos better."

roadhog: "Over your dead body"

-----

Mercy: "Oh dear, why are they making you fight."

Ace: "I can't blame them; I'm the perfect killer. And got the scars to prove it."

Mercy: sigh

-----

Lifewever: "You aren't alone out there. Remember that."

Ace: "Thanks that means a lot to me, actally."

---

Lucio: "hey! Ace any music request?!"

Ace: "Got any hyperpop?!"

Lucio: "hell yeah, I do."

----

hello= hello there!

Thanks= thank you so much!

Sorry= fuck! I'm so sorry

I need healing= I'm sorry, but I'm low here

Ping enemy= we got a problem, guys!

With payload= im guarding the payload!

#roleplay finder #roleplay partner search #roleplay search #double up rp search #oc x cc rp #roleplay #overwatch rp #overwatch roleplay #oc rp #roleplay seeking #dear god id kill to rp this #pleaserp #rp plot #overwatch roleplay search

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sobredunia · 3 years ago

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Am curious,

What is puppet girls lore?

(If she has one.)

Sadly, she doesn't have any. I just thought of some cool character design and made her

We ca give her lore together tho :>

#ask #undum #i thought the basic tortured lab experiment story #but we can do something different

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arcane-ish · 2 years ago

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Singed vs Silco

Looking at the Warwick short stories and bio again ("He still wonders if he'd truly wanted this. He can't remember details, but he remembers enough. Enough to know Singed had been right all along - the good man had been a lie, before disaster had burned it away, revealing the truth. He is Warwick. He is a killer.")

and thinking about how in a lot of way Warwick is actually going to in a way going to continue Silco's act 1 plan it really made me wonder if Singed is actually going to gain a genuine thought out motivation. Like what exactly motivates him in universe to make Warwick?

Does he actually want to continue Silco's Act 1 plan because he liked Silco and he is continuing his work in a way? Respectively, does he actually share Silco's thoughts about Zaun's independence and Zaun vs Piltover despite being from Piltover? (maybe they could bring back that he had a falling out with Piltover and wants revenge on then, but then why would he care much about Zaun's independence and sovreignty?)

Basically, was he on board with Silco because he has a political opinion on Zaun vs Piltover, or was it always that he liked Silco as a person or was he along on the ride because he has a scientific fascination with things going bad and the revolutionaries are where interesting things happen? Or was he using Silco because Silco was willing to provide him with funding/a lab without any moral constraints of his work?

Back to Warwick, is he creating him as a tool (to get back at Piltover, to patrol the streets of Zaun)? Did he do it as a favor to Silco, either because Silco asked or because he assumes Silco would want it? If yes, to keep Vander alive or to torture Vander and make him suffer on Silco's behalf?

Or does he see it as doing Vander a favor, either to keep him alive or live at his full potential as a monster because he shares Silco's Act 1 view on monsters? Again: did he inherit his views from Silco/get inspired by Silco's views? or did Silco's views come from Singed? Or were they kindred spirits who care about the beauty of monsters who just came across each other by accident?

Does Singed have a fleshy/mutation based version of Viktor's glorious evolution belief? Where he thinks that pushed people to the limits in regards to how much mutation they can take is a desirable thing just like Glorious Evolution thinks that "more metal = better". (btw Urgot would really fit into a story like this) Or is he more about doing things to people and then stepping back and seeing what result his experiments have?

In the show, we see a couple of his other "transformations". Okay, at least I headcanon that he fixed up Silco after Silco's Vander induced injuries => but then he mostly let's Silco run three. Similarly, he fixes Jinx up with Shimmer but then Jinx goes free. The last one is Rio the lizard thingie which like Warwick he does keep trapped (imo: probably because it is the source of Shimmer and he needs it).

Mutating the rat that kills the cat seems to be more an example of "change things in the system and then just step back and see what they do". Similarly, he's very hands off with Deckard and let's Silco take control of him.

So... why is he keeping Warwick for so long? If they go more into the idea that maybe Singed made Orianna, that would fit more with a very deliberate forging of somebody and not wanting to stop till you are completely done. One thing of course would be that it's not safe to let Vander go (not that Singed ever seemed to care much about safety in his other "release it onto the wild" or "introduce an element to the system and watch the effects" examples), but that would be pretty sharp break of League characterizations where the aim seems to be to make Warwick more violent rather than "I can't let him to till his violent tendencies are curbed or forged enough". Or it could again be him feeling like he's doing Vander a favor by "bringing out the real him" and so it's more a "I'm not gonna stop and release Vander till Vander is into it/till he has embraced it".

#arcane #singed #warwick #vander #silco

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skelemira · 4 years ago

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Ooooh whats Rowan's lore? *grabs popcorn*

ALRIGHT BUCKLE UP BUTTERCUPS

Gonna leave it after the cut (if I remember how to do the cut right on mobile lol) so I don't clog up feeds

So Rowan started out as a human. Her family was okay financially, probably lower middle class. Not rich enough to be truly comfortable, but not in a whole lot of danger debt-wise. She had a mother, a father, an older sister named Magnolia (Nolia for short) and a little brother named Cedar (lol do you see a naming pattern here I'm so creative). Her parents were... Okay. They weren't abusive or anything, but they weren't exactly doting. They didn't really have the time to be doting, since they both worked all the time. The siblings all got along really well, though, the type of siblings that stuck together initially because they lacked that true family relationship but slowly morphed into ride or die siblings.

So one day, little 14-year-old Rowan (Nolia was 16, soon to be 17, and Cedar was 10) gets home from school, pretty average, normal day.

She's sitting at the table doing her hw when someone knocks at the door and her parents (it was kind of weird, they were never home at this hour) rush to open it. There stands a man in a lab coat, holding an envelope. Rowan hated him instantly. Something about him seemed wrong.

He talked to her parents for a bit, and her parents asked her to go get Nolia and Cedar with some urgency in their voices. And.... If she was right in placing that tone.... Guilty excitement...?

She got her siblings and they came downstairs.

Turns out her parents had been closer to debt than she realized. So to get some more money and.... Relieve some financial burdens, they sold their kids to a group of scientists needing victi----research participants.

Of course there was a struggle, Nolia stepping up to try and defend her siblings, screaming at her parents, Rowan holding Cedar close while silent tears poured down both their faces.

But the scientist was prepared, and before anyone could react, three men appeared with rags, holding them over the kids' mouths.

She woke up in an empty white room.

Well... If you could call it white. It was more of a dinghy, hardly cleaned beige. These men were not with the government, she could immediately tell that.

Gonna sum up this part bc it involves torture but basically the scientists were experimenting to see if they could turn a human into a monster. They found only Rowan's soul was compatible. They used her siblings to keep her under control..... Only they had dumped Nolia and Cedar on the streets weeks ago. They simply reused footage to "prove" to Rowan they were still there.

They almost succeeded in their experiment. They forced so much magic into her soul that it started to flip.... But it was too much and Rowan flatlined. They dumped her body in the woods, only disappointed that they came so close.

A couple months passed. Her body decayed until only her skeleton remained. The decaying process was helped along by all the magic, which seemed to have concentrated in her bones, morphing them slowly until they were all connected.

She woke up.

She spent several years on the streets. She begged, she stole, and... She drank. Or at least she tried to. (She was allowed into bars because people thought she was a monster, and she wasn't wearing stripes, so that must mean she was an adult.) She quickly discovered that her alcohol tolerance was *legendary*. She drank bars dry having drinking contests with people (that's how she paid for all her drinks) but felt no different than before. Eventually someone dared her to try Everclear, and though she grimaced at the taste, she drank the entire bottle.

The bar was silent.

The taste eventually grew on her, a kind of self-inflicted punishment that soon became a routine, almost a comfort.

Now a good chunk of the next part has to do with my friend's sonas which I'm not going to talk about because they're not my characters, but suffice it to say they were amazing friends to her and helped her recover and get on her feet.

One such friend discovered her sleeping by Grillby's dumpster, and Grillby let her stay the night on his couch, setting up a job at Muffet's for her the next day. She and Muffet became really close friends and finally she started to have a more stable life. (She finds and dates Underlust Sans but that's another story lol which I would be happy to share in another ask~ but y'all these two are so cute plz)

So someone suggests she go see a therapist. Goodness knows she's got some trauma. So she agrees. The name of her therapist seems..... Eerily familiar but she decides to ignore her gut and go anyway. She walks into the therapist's office and---

And sees her mother sitting there, looking professional and well-rested and happy.

She runs.

Yeah so suffice it to say she isn't gonna trust therapy again for a bit lol, and it takes her even LONGER (and some good therapy sessions) to accept the fact that her mother was clearly better off without her and her siblings.

Yeah ya girl has a lot of issues, especially abandonment <3 she is very much a people pleaser and WILL put your needs high above her own. Anything to make you want to stay. Anything to make her feel needed or wanted.

So she's hanging out at Grillby's one day (he and his bartender like to try out different mixes on her, try to see if they can get her to make a face at a cocktail) when a huge party comes in. Rowan automatically shrinks a bit from discomfort because of the big crowd, and she continues her game with Grillby and the bartender (the bartender is my friend's sona that's why I'm not naming them lol). Then she hears something that makes her freeze mid-sip.

"Let's hear it for Magnolia!!!! The first of us to get tied down!" Followed by raucous laugh....ter...

She recognizes that laugh.

She flees the bar, with no explanation to anyone. She catches a glimpse of Nolia, with Cedar by her side, and both of their eyes squint slightly in confusion as she passes by them.

She makes it outside, looking around for where to go, unable to think in her panicked confusion when---

"R......Rowan?"

She goes ramrod straight and slowly turns, hands balled into fists to hide the violent shaking. Nolia bursts into tears, Cedar immediately clinging to her stiff form, his shoulders shaking as bad as her hands.

They.... Recognized her. They.........

Were *happy* to see her.

Slowly she hugged them back and they got to catching up. (So yeah if it wasn't clear Nolia was getting married, they both had survived on the streets together until Nolia was old enough to get a job).

Also something I forgot to mention lol is Rowan had found 2 kittens behind Muffet's, an older girl kitten fiercely protecting a little boy kitten. They immediately latched onto her after she made it clear she wasn't a threat, and she decided to name them after her siblings.

Also things worth noting, she smells like apples, she has magical red translucent hair, her soul wavers from more upside down like a monster's to more upright like a human's, she loves to bake, she is like the DEFINITION of cottagecore, she has magical tattoos on her face that change around to look like the Day of the Dead skulls (the colors get brighter or darker with her moods), and she drinks 2 bottle of everclear every time she goes to Grillby's. The paramedics in the area quickly become used to people calling the ambulance when she drinks (seriously look up everclear it's basically pure alcohol). She eventually stops drinking (not that it was *really* harming her since she had that alcohol tolerance and a body made primarily of magic at this point (plus alcohol isn't really gonna hurt her, she doesn't have kidneys lol) but she wanted to stop anyway. She loves to paint and teaches one of her friends to paint, tending to her friend's garden while her friend paints. She also loves to cook and bake, she eventually helps out with baking at Muffet's, though she refuses to bake the spiders into the pastries. Her scones are things of legend, they sell out as soon as she brings the tray out of the kitchen.

Yeah that was a lot lol and there's little things here and there that I missed so feel free to send in questions about her if you want to know anything! Or if you want to know how Rowan and UL Sans got together (spoiler: they eventually get married and it's so cute)

#ask #anon #oc time babyyyy #Rowan #Rowan beloved #also thank you guys so much for asking about her #I adore her so much and don't get the chance often to share her lore

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skipppppy · 4 years ago

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I’m so fascinated by your she ra fan character! I’m trying to understand the storyline but it’s a little hard to find everything, and I was wondering if you would mind explaining it here?

Thank you very much! Her story is SUPER convuluted, I elaborated on it a bit on another ask about her relationship with Entrapta, but I’ll try to sum it up as cleanly as possible but a lot of different factors come into play so it still might be LOOONNGG. It’s also not a very happy story, unfortunately, but it would be helpful for me to get it all written down!

In terms of things that might be triggering, her backstory involves mention of a wide range of abuse. It won’t be explicit but I just want to be safe!

I’m actually gonna put most of it under the cut for the sake of anyone who follows me or any tags so they aren’t cursed with a mile long post on their timeline. I know the pain 😅

So here it is! I present A COMPREHENSIVE TIMELINE OF ALL THE BULLSHIT ARIA HAD TO PUT UP WITH!!!!

-For background context, she’s a Wingfolk, a species of Bird People native to Etheria who live in a kingdom built into a forest of giant trees named Ornithia. I could go on about them for hours but all you really need to know is that they have hollow bones to achieve flight (which is also the case for real life birds), which makes Aria’s body very light and frail. So she’s basically useless in physical combat which is why she never really defends herself. She was also a particularly weak flyer, which is why she doesn’t avoid a lot of situations by simply flying away.

-EXTRA BACKGROUND CONTEXT, Aria was born around the time the Horde landed on Etheria. Her father was a sorcerer at Mystacor, who had a reputation for ignoring ethics in the name of science. This all came to a head when a meteorite struck the surface of the planet; he rushed to the sight, stole it, studied it for a while, and after learning it had a powerful magic, decided to try a ritual in which he extracted the magic from the meteorite and fused it with his daughter’s soul. It took a few years for people to find out but when they did he was exiled for his actions, and Aria, still a child, was given to her mother.

-ONE MORE SMALL DETAIL: from about the age of 18/19 onward, she started having dreams about a mysterious figure made of blinding light who knew secrets about the universe and promised to find her one day so they could “finally be together again.” 3 guesses who THAT is lmao (hint: it’s Horde Prime)

-I won’t go into details about her childhood because we’d be here forever but the most important things you need to know are 1) Aria’s mother was a HORRIBLE parent and preferred to get blackout drunk rather than look after her children. 2) Aria had 4 younger brothers who, due to her mother’s negligence, she had to raise entirely by herself, which is why she feels responsible over others and has such a “nurturing” disposition, it was forced on her. 3) She took her brothers and ran away from Ornithia when she was 15, and built a home in a small woodland in the mountains of Dryl where she has lived ever since. 4) Throughout her childhood she befriended Princess Entrapta and the two were extremely close due to their isolated upbringings.

-When the BFS visited Dryl for the first time in Season 1, Aria was there acting as both a lab assistant and royal advisor to Entrapta, and joined the rebellion alongside her. Nothing crazy happened, but when Entrapta “died” Aria was beside herself with grief and ended up leaving the rebellion in order to go tend to Dryl, since it needed a ruler and as advisor it was her job to step up and take responsibility. Unlike the others, however, she refused to return to aid in the battle of Brightmoon, since she was kinda miffed at how the Princesses treated Entrapta (lookin’ at you, leash lady Perfuma) and was thoroughly pissed that they didn’t even TRY to go back for her, even if it was just to find her body and give her a dignified burial.

-Season 2 was when things truly went to shit. When the Horde came to claim Dryl, Aria resisted but was defeated pretty easily. When Glimmer and Bow came to scout out the situation, they saw her being hauled away and tried to save her but basically got caught in a stalemate where they couldn’t act because the Horde threatened to harm Entrapta if they acted. They told Aria to go with the Horde and promised that they would form a rescue party to save the both of them. But after they learned that Entrapta had joined the Horde by choice and had more important missions to deal with, rescuing her just..stopped being a priority. She wasn’t a rebel so they had no obligation to get her, so eventually they forgot about her entirely.

-Aria was kept as a prisoner for a while, but Entrapta found out pretty quickly what happened and went to find her. At that point Catra was growing frustrated with all the menial paperwork she had to do, and since she’d had experience being an advisor/secretary type, Entrapta basically proposed to Hordak that Aria act as his assistant in the same way she used to at Dryl. He accepted since it meant he would be spending less time running the Horde and more time building the portal. Aria was against the idea of helping him since she was still holding out hope that the rebels would come save her, but she was simply threatened with the classic Evil Horde punishments (torture, more torture, being locked in a cell for weeks without food or water, a tad more torture). So from mid-Season 2 to the end of Season 4, that was pretty much the position she was in. Being the Fright Zone’s resident desk jockey.

-Not much happened in that timespan, most of what occurred revolved around the portal incident and the aftermath. While Aria had been playing the part of Hordak’s pretty little secretary she was trying to find weak points in the Fright Zone’s security system so she could bust her and Entrapta out of there. Due to her and Hordak building the portal (and smooching lol) she’d been spending less and less time with Aria, which had been making her a little upset. She felt like someone she’d spent her entire life caring for was replacing her for something better, but her suspicions weren’t confirmed until she asked Entrapta about leaving together and she refused. That was the first small nudge towards a downward spiral. Then Catra returned with Adora and the Sword in hand and the Princesses came to stop the Portal. The rebels had come to save Adora and forgot about her. She was willing to forgive and join them, until they saw that she had been assisting the Horde, assumed she had betrayed them alongside Entrapta, and decided to leave her behind without giving her a chance to explain herself. That was the second, slightly stronger nudge that made her teeter over the edge of a breakdown. And then Catra told her that Entrapta had abandoned her to rejoin the rebels. While it was a lie, it was perfectly placed salt in the wound, and the straw that broke the camels back into her shifting allegiance and properly joining the Horde.

-Throughout Season 4 she had the same role as before, except this time she actually cared about her work, and had taken on the additional role of helping Hordak with his busted tech since Entrapta wasn’t around to do it. He had already come to rely on Aria for paperwork, but now she was helping him with his machines and they had a shared trauma over being “abandoned” by someone they cared deeply for. She was literally filling the void Entrapta left, and in a way they started to care for each other. Aria, being a hopeless romantic who had read about a trillion love stories about gentle protagonists who healed the evil monster men with their kindness, took to him like a moth to a flame and happily played the role of “the next best thing” against her better judgement. It wasn’t really a healthy relationship, but they did genuinely care for each other and found comfort in one another’s presence.

-It didn’t last, however. Catra was vaguely aware of the “thing” they had, and while she was indifferent for the most part, she was dealing with a downward spiral of her own, and she slowly became paranoid that Aria would distract him from completing their plans. In her poor, burnt out kitty cat frame of mind, the only way to deal with the situation was to get rid of her. So, deciding to kill 2 birds with one stone, she told Hordak that Aria had been jealous of his relationship with Entrapta, and SHE had been the one to send her to beast island. And Hordak believed her.

-I won’t go into detail about what happened after that, because it was VERY GRUESOME! We all saw how Hordak reacted when he found out what Catra had done in the original show. Now remember when I mentioned that Aria has hollow bones that made her incredibly frail and physically incapable of defending herself? Yeah. It was not pretty. Hordak wasn’t completely at fault, since he thought his anger was warranted, but by the time he’d learnt the truth and realised his mistake she was dead. In the space between the incident and learning what really happened he’d thrown her in the abandoned black garnet chamber with no food or water and basically left her to rot. He was EXTRA mad at Catra for pulling that with him, but he didn’t have time to grieve since he, Glimmer, Catra, and Aria’s lifeless corpse were beamed up into Horde Prime’s flagship.

-When Prime initially found her she was still dead. However, remember the healing magic that came from the mysterious meteorite that had now fused with her soul? Spoiler alert! It belonged to him. The meteorite was one of his most prized possessions, and the dreams Aria had been having were the magic’s attempts at trying to establish a connection with him across dimensions. (the meteorite was somewhat sentient. This is perfectly normal and well thought out writing I swear) And being reunited caused a huge surge of magical energy that resuscitated her, allowing Prime’s clones to give her some much needed medical help.

-After being pretty much comatose for 2 weeks Aria finally woke up, and was finally able to speak with Prime in person. When she found out that the “mysterious figure” from her dreams who had promised to find her was REAL and had just saved her life, she basically just latched onto him. She was, understandably, TRAUMATISED from the last 2 or so years of her life, so she was too scared to go anywhere else or trust anyone, so Prime didn’t even have to try to win her allegiance. He was also very happy to have his meteorite back, even if it now had a mortal body with skin and a face and a slew of emotional baggage. So she spends most of Season 5 being showered in love and affection by Prime and all her attendants, eventually being crowned Empress. While Prime was unequivocally evil and Aria was aware of that, he mostly sheltered her from what he was doing, in fear that her loyalty to him might falter. Maybe in a fun au she could’ve convinced him to leave Etheria alone so they could be together for longer, but alas, it was not to be.

-In the aftermath of the Heart being destroyed and Prime being killed, her downward spiral returned and shifted into OVERDRIVE. The people who had abandoned and neglected her took her one safe person away from her and they were being hailed as heroes for it. While she now knew that Entrapta had never abandoned her and was instead sent to beast island, seeing her get a happy ending with the man who had, to be quite blunt, physically abused and assaulted her, shattered any part of their friendship that might have been recoverable. She retreated into herself, taking over Horde Prime’s role as ruler over the Clones. She turned the Velvet Glove into their new home, trying to be civil with the other Princesses but eventually descended into a cold, bitter, vindictive Empress who ended up making terrible decisions as a cry for help.

-I’m still undecided on what to do with her after her fun villain arc, but I do know that in the aftermath she’d probably either step down from the throne so she could properly heal from her trauma, or work with her clones to fix up Prime’s flagship and get as far away from Etheria as possible and find peace in a new life away from everything that hurt her. I may also bring back Horde Prime from the dead through my sheer will to ignore canon so they can be together, since they are for all intents and purposes, soulmates. And I don’t think it would be very fair to let my poor hopeless romantic who just wants to be loved lose her handsome prince forever. I think it would be sexy if I committed necromancy I think.

ANYWAY...THAT WAS A HEFTY READ..SORRY IT WAS SO LONG, BUT THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!! I CAN COME BACK TO THIS FOR REFERENCE NOW

TLDR: babygirl has had it ROUGH

#spop oc #she ra oc #aria

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ask-ssec · 4 years ago

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Following up from last question, what would happen when all of the main cast are at their most deepest of despair where there is no sense of happiness within them?

Author Chan: That’s too depressing, even for me. So, Not gonna draw it, but let’s see... this will ofc, be in different universes, so each character is in a different universe, but I feel like each is at the point of despair thats the most. (None of these are canon. There is officially only one ssec universe)

Blizz: Is still in his lab, with his memories. A head guard and ruthless, emotionless. Has to watch Vay slowly deteriorate until Vay became so unhinged that he had to be killed. Which, they ofc, forced Blizz to watch. All the other main boys have also died or went missing, so Blizz is alone. And Labsol is furious with him and makes his life hell due to what happened to Vay. Has vivid night terrors about the horrible things he has done and the Pokémon who he has had a hand in killing. But. He is very, VERY powerful. He trained his analytical and strength abilities to the point where they are always on. And through means unknown, has acquired several others, including the ability to turn into a human. But no one knows he did. Is slowly climbing the ranks as a human to get to the top of plex and destroy it. BUT. With a very low success rate, who knows if it’ll happen.

Dusk: During their escape, Sora was killed right in front of him, her blood and gore drenching him, causing Dusk to have a massive mental breakdown, that accedently kills Bolt, Flame, and Vay in the process. Blizz is the only one alive, but he is unconscious (and no memories, as usual). Dusk leaves Blizz, fearful, and retreats into an unknown location, where he turns literally insane because he killed his brothers and watched the love of his life get mutilated in front of him! What happens to Blizz? Well. He gets retrained by the lab and becomes an even better killing machine with nothing to hold him back! And this Blizz, is on the hunt! For Dusk. (Cause the lab wants him dead).

Eve: Her egg was never given away. Instead, it went missing, and ended up in a place where normal eevee eggs are kept. She was hatched by Plex and, as a baby, was immediately experimented on and tortured a ton! You know, as the lab does. After they find out about her other abilities, its too late, they already pretty much mentally broke her. So now, she has to train and be pushed by the lab guys because of her actual abilities, while constantly in pain and stress! And. Trust me. If you guys knew what her ability is, you’d know why they are pushing her so hard. Keep in mind that she is still a child.

Vay: Honestly just keep him with Labsol. In this universe, the plan to escape never happened. Blizz was killed trying to protect him from Labsol, his last words being that he loved him. So, now, he is being abused and used daily by his closest friend/brother’s literal murderer! Vay deteriorates even more and more, lashing out at the others and ending up alone in the end, the only one he can turn to being Labsol, who, as we know, is an abuser and murderer. This messes up with Vay’s mind a lot, but in the end, he submits to him. (Author Chan: I feel actually sick writing this, sorry) Vay has lost all hope, all family, and all will to live, but is forced to live and be Labsol’s play thing and a test monkey.

Bolt: This is a hard one. I know there could be a universe where Bolt is sad, but. It would mean the events that happened to him in general would be really different. Instead of the experiment he did, I’m thinking they instead thought it would be great to put him in the fire elemental experiment, which has a low survival rate. This causes immense pain and scarring for Bolt, burning off most of his fur and almost killing him. But, he does get fire abilities, Just that he is unable to move and is bed ridden. His time in the lab slowly turns him jaded, and when he found out his brothers left without him (except Sora) it broke him. When he can walk and function again, the lab ofc, locks him up because “oops. Fire elementals are dangerous. Where he doesn’t get to talk or interact with anyone for years. Until. They want him to breed. So they send him to Kalos, where a couple of things happen, including him being forced to breed with Sora. Who he accidentally burns. This causes Sol to go haywire on him, almost killing him. And from then on, Bolt just. Breaks.

Flame: Basically, Have Sora escape with them. And no agency. So Flame is depressed, resentful, jealous of Dusk, and hates himself. He’ll slowly deteriorate himself due to being a literal waste of space with nothing to do and no one to turn to.

Daisy: I honestly cant say much without spoiling her story. But, at a pivotal moment, when she is alone and hiding, have someone find her, and make her actually watch what’s happening. This will break her to the max. Wow. I cant say a LOT about Daisy. rip.

Dawn: the trainer loved and trained her, then literally abandon her. No wonder trade, no PC, but full on release. That will shatter her. From that point on, Dawn will be a walking shell, because she puts all of her self worth on the trainer’s affection towards her, ant the trainer just threw her out like trash. As she lives in the wild, bad things keep happening to her, Pokémon go after her, her lack of survival instincts show, and no one helps her. One day, she sees Scull, looking for her. She runs up to him, but- “BANG” he goes down. Pokémon poachers killed him for his pelt. “BANG” another shot, aimed at her. She runs, tears streaming down her face. And there, hiding from the poachers, in a dark cave/burrow with small chance of escape. She feels despair.

Miku: That moment in the agency, when Ford came to her. Just, take that out. He never comes to her. She gets lost in her head, and loses all hope. There, it honestly just down hill. She’ll retreat into herself, not really listening to anyone. And then, when events happen and Sol gets his hands on her, she’ll just go along with him, and become his mate. Which sadly, isssss not really a good thing for her. Like... at all. She’ll become more and more unhappy, and lost. Sol does spoiler things with her by his side, and. Miku sees Sol literally kill Dusk right before her eyes, somehow. This. Causes her. To absolutely loose it.

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aliendes · 5 years ago

Text

Natural Borns - Chapter Five

Banner made by @thebannershop

Series info/genre: Angst, fluff, future smut - NSFW due to darker themes

Pairings: ot7 x fem reader (eventual)

Warnings: mentions of sex in exchange for favors but it doesn’t actually happen, mentions of suicide, anxiety, and depression. Mentions of alcohol, tobacco, and drug use. Mentions of prescription drugs and medical stuff like blood. Insinuations of poly relationships, if this make you uncomfortable, this will be a reoccurring theme for the rest of the series. The boys love each other, that’s the point of this story. Mentions of skipping meals? If that’s a warning. Warnings will be different for each chapter from here on out.

Description: In the year 2613, over half of the world’s population are what scientists consider ‘designer babies’. YN is a small town girl who is a true natural born, someone born naturally without he help of a lab or gene splicing. Her DNA is greatly sought after, but what is she willing to do to protect it?

Word count: 4.2k ~

A/N: I’m really excited for this chapter! This is Yoongi’s backstory! Yay!! There is also some juicy info in this chapter that will be explored in the next one. Also, you guys voted for smut with romantic relationships, so please note that for the rest of the series, there will be smut, poly relationships, etc. If this makes you uncomfortable, I totally understand. If you want to be added/removed from the taglist please send me an ask! Enjoy!!

xx Des

Updated: 8/15/2020

As the day went on, and the sun started to set beyond the hills, your mind was plagued with the thoughts that this was all a horrible, horrible idea.

After you stormed out of the warehouse, the remaining four men in Yoongi’s room continued to argue about whether or not it would be a good idea to let you help with their plan. Seokjin and Jungkook were firmly against it. They felt enchanted by your personality and something about you was captivating to them. Hoseok and Yoongi were both incredibly unsure of your place in this family, not yet trusting of you. Yoongi obviously felt an attraction to you, but he wasn’t entirely sure it was anything beyond physical at this point. Though, he knew if he let it, it would fester into something much, much stronger. Whenever you were present he could feel himself start to slip. The cold exterior he always made a show of keeping up, crumbling to ash in his hands. He can’t deny the way his heart clenched in his chest when you ran out of the room. He wanted to run after you, tell you that he wouldn’t make you do anything you weren’t comfortable with. But he held himself back. He’s had plenty of practice holding himself back and not allowing his emotions to crack his icy walls.

Namjoon was Yoongi’s first friend in the facility. They were both ‘bought’ from their mothers when they were teenagers, and since they were similar in age, they roomed together at Big Hit. Namjoon had already been at the lab for a few months before Yoongi showed up, disheveled and scared. Unlike Namjoon, Yoongi had a very hard time coping with the fact that he now had to live in a cramped room with another boy, be poked and prodded and experimented on.

Namjoon had lived a pretty sheltered life, and didn’t have too many friends growing up. Yoongi was the complete opposite. He was seen as the ‘bad boy’ in his high school, always getting the girls because of his unusual good looks, smoking cigarettes behind the school, and causing trouble in his classes. He liked to think he had a lot of friends, but most of them were deadbeats who only hung around him because he stole cigarettes and alcohol from his mom’s boyfriends. Regardless, he enjoyed being out of the house and living his life the way he wanted to. When he was brought to Big Hit, all of that changed. His freedoms were stripped from him, even basic human needs were stripped from him. They would often go days without eating, only being given water, told that they had to ‘fast’ in order for certain experiments to work, or for certain blood work to be done. All of the torture they endured was ‘in the name of science’. Or so they were told.

Yoongi went through the stages of grief pretty quickly in the lab. When he first arrived, he was extremely upset, in denial that any of that was actually happening to him. He would tell Namjoon that his mom would come get him any minute now, and all of this would be some horrible joke she played on him to get him back on the straight and narrow, get him to stop skipping school and drinking. After a few days went by, he realized she wasn’t coming, and anger quickly took over him. Yoongi attempted to break down the door in his and Namjoon’s tiny room, to no avail. Eventually the guards sedated him and Namjoon had to look after him for two days while he sweated out the medication, shaking and dehydrated from lack of fluids. After that happened, he started to bargain with the guards or the doctors that would come take him into exam rooms, telling them he would do anything for them to release him, even resorting to offering favors in exchange for freedom. He never followed through with any of his offers, but he would later hate himself for stooping that low.

After a few weeks of this, Yoongi eventually developed severe depression, even being put on suicide watch at one point. After spending so much time together in their tiny dorm, Namjoon started to really care for the older boy and was extremely distraught over his behavior. He would tell Yoongi that everything would be ok, and one day they would get out of there. Some nights it got so bad Namjoon would slip into Yoongi’s bed and hold him close while he sobbed or when he woke up from nightmares.

Yoongi would sleep away days at a time, not eating or drinking water. Namjoon would have to force water down his throat when he was getting delirious and having horrible migraines that prevented him from moving around too much. Namjoon would lay with him while he shook from dehydration mixed with the meds they gave him. Yoongi lost his will to live, lost his will to do anything but accept what the lab was doing to him. There was nothing he could do about it, and while Namjoon had remained optimistic about their future, Yoongi accepted their fate and allowed the doctors and technicians to do whatever they wanted with him. He became a shell of his former self, not getting out of bed unless carried by Namjoon or the technicians, staring at the wall for hours on end, and only speaking when he was forced by the doctors. Namjoon cried for his friend, only wanting to help, wanting to get him out of there.

That was why Namjoon came up with the escape plan. One night, after Yoongi had been at the facility for nearly a year, Namjoon woke him up in the early hours of the morning. Apparently, the younger had been learning the rotations of the technicians and the guards when he was being moved from room to room. He would also listen in on their conversations while he was being given meds or having his blood drawn in the exam room, which was right next to the guard room. He didn’t tell Yoongi what he was doing because he didn’t want anyone to overhear them and ruin his plan, so Yoongi was completely shocked to learn he had all of this planned out.

Namjoon said that the guards would be on break in the guard room around 3:30 AM, and at 3:40 AM the technician on duty would rotate with the morning shift, who comes in at 3:45 AM and the guards would end their break around the same time, giving them a five minute window to get out of their rooms and down a hallway that led to the elevators. They both knew that this hallway led away from the exam rooms, and therefore, away from the guards. Yoongi was even more shocked when Namjoon pulled a keycard out of his back pocket that he took off one of the guards earlier when he was being given medication. That keycard would allow them to get onto the elevator and, hopefully, escape this place.

Given all the things that could’ve gone wrong, Namjoon and Yoongi’s escape went relatively seamlessly, and once they were out of that God forsaken place, they moved from place to place together, sleeping on the streets, abandoned houses, and homeless shelters, until they met Seokjin and Jungkook. Two men who were at one point, also housed at Big Hit, but released for different reasons. They would later meet the others and form the family they know and love today. Yoongi was thankful for the six men, living with them, and growing with them. They had a shared traumatic experience that they helped each other through, leaned on each other, and eventually developed a bond that they never expected.

Even after all these years, Yoongi still admired Namjoon and was beyond thankful for him for being there through his darkest times. Quite literally keeping him alive in the facility when he had given up trying. He owed Namjoon his life and respected him more than anyone on this planet. He never wanted to disappoint him and has been helping him find other natural borns to further his vision of equality, even if he didn’t always want to. Yoongi would much rather it just be the seven of them for the rest of their lives, but he understood why Namjoon pushed for this, why he stood up for others that couldn’t stand up for themselves. It was one of the many reasons he admired the man.

That is exactly why Yoongi is currently standing outside the warehouse, back against the large metal door you had run out of earlier today. The sun had set over an hour ago, meaning you had been gone most of the day. The others would have panicked by now, had it not been for Hoseok alerting them of your whereabouts. They were all shocked when Hobi had come into Yoongi’s room a few hours ago, letting them all know he had been watching you from the second floor, sitting on a rock down by the quarry. Jungkook and Seokjin had both wanted to go to you, but Namjoon talked them down, telling them you needed time to process everything that had happened to you. You were dealing with a lot, even now, and you didn’t even have the full story. They knew Namjoon’s words were true, having gone through something similar themselves. Though, they couldn’t imagine how you were feeling, having to suddenly leave your family with little explanation.

It was only after Namjoon pulled Yoongi aside in the hallway, telling him again he needed to fix this, apologize to you, even if he didn’t want to. He needed to make sure you stayed with them because if you didn’t, you’d be in more danger than you realized. Yoongi would never let Namjoon down, and so, he made his way down to the water to make good on his promise to fix this.

You were vaguely aware that the sun had set a while ago, sat on a rock, knees pulled to your chest, and face resting upon your crossed arms. You weren’t sobbing anymore, just a few stray tears falling every now and then. You were sure your face was red and swollen with how much crying you’ve done today.

The sound of the ripples on the water, the wind slowly blowing the trees around you, and the sound of chirping crickets was helping you relax, but with nightfall, brought cooler temperatures. Even though it was summer, it was still a bit chilly at night with how much humidity was in the air. Being right next to water wasn’t helping either. Just as a chill ran down your spine, causing you to shiver violently, you felt something warm being draped over your shoulder.

You startled, head snapping up at the new presence beside you, causing you to let out a curse as you nearly fell backwards. As you righted yourself, you were met with a pair of nearly black eyes that you least expected to see right now. “You’re shivering,” Yoongi coldly stated, face emotionless as he looked down at your pathetic state.

Way to state the obvious, you thought. But truthfully, you were thankful for the warmth of the leather jacket he had wrapped you in. You audibly gulped, looking up at him with eyes as wide as they could go, considering how puffy they were. “T- th- thanks…” you trailed off quietly, grabbing the sides of the jacket to pull it closer to you. You hadn’t realized just how cold you were.

“You coming back up?”

You mulled over his question for a moment. You were cold. And hungry. And completely and utterly exhausted and probably dehydrated with the river of tears you’ve cried today. Yet, you didn’t feel all that welcome in their ‘home’ and you were unsure if you really wanted to go back. Yoongi seemed to notice your hesitancy, taking the opportunity to say what he had practiced all the way down here. Talking wasn’t his strong suit. “They’re really worried about you, you know,” he uttered, softer than before, but still monotone.

Is that what he came all the way down here to tell you? You furrowed your brows at him, “They can come down here if they want,” you were pretty sure your brazen attitude was stemming from your emotional state and the chilly breeze, “they didn’t have to send you.”

Yoongi pursed his lips into a thin line, biting his tongue from saying what he really wanted to say, you think I want to be here? Instead, he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply through his nose and let out a long sigh. When he opened his eyes, he saw you still staring at him, daring him to say something. He liked it, the fire in you. You seemed like a shy girl, timid even. He hoped you still had that fire after you learned what a horrible, unjust world you all live in.

Yoongi sat down on the rock next to you, not asking first, just making room for himself. You quickly scooted over, not feeling incredibly comfortable with him yet. “I’m sorry,” he began, staring down at his lap, “I was being unfair.” It almost sounded like the words were forced, like he didn’t really mean them, or want to say them, but you still took some comfort in the fact he was at least apologizing to you. Not that you thought he owed you an apology, but it still felt nice.

“No, you aren’t being unfair,” you murmured, looking out at the now cerulean blue water, “I’m sorry. Sorry I’m here.”

You sounded so small, so defeated. You reminded Yoongi of how he felt when he was first taken from his family. Scared, alone. Something in him wanted to reach out to you, comfort you, and he almost did, stopping his hand midair before it could reach your arm. You noticed his movement out of the corner of your eye and before he could retract his hand, you flinched. Actually flinched away from him. It was slight, but it still took Yoongi by surprise, jaw hanging slack, eyes widening at your apparent fear. Of him. Yoongi doesn’t think he’s ever felt shittier in his life. Was he so cold someone was actually afraid he’d hurt them? He’s never hurt anyone in his life. Sure, he was a ‘bad boy’, broke his fair share of laws, but he has never, ever, hurt another person.

“YN -”, he retracted his hand immediately, bringing it behind his back, wanting to hide the offending appendage, “I - wh -” he wasn’t even sure how to finish his sentence. He watched you pull your knees closer to your chest and lay your forehead on them, letting out a breath you had been holding. You didn’t look scared, you looked exasperated, and he wasn’t sure if that made him feel any better at all.

You didn’t actually think Yoongi would hurt you, you’ve just been so used to people treating you however they want, especially in high school. Boys would push you around in the hallways, girls would pull your hair in class and steal your backpack from under the lunch table. After high school, men would pull on your skirts or dresses at the market while you tried to sell flowers with a smile plastered on your face, which inevitably caused you to throw away any clothes that weren’t pants and baggy shirts. You were relatively afraid of people, and even though you trusted the men who took you in and have been helping you, you still didn’t know Yoongi, or the type of person he was. Now you felt remorse at the look on his face when you flinched away. He looks honestly heartbroken, regret written all over his features. You shook your head back and forth, forehead rubbing against your linen covered knees.

“I’m sorry,” you sobbed quietly, not daring to look back at the blonde next to you.

Yoongi’s heart broke further at the sound, “Can I touch you?”

Though you were shocked at Yoongi’s sudden query, you didn’t lift your head. Slowly, you nodded up and down, hoping he could see it. Now that you were expecting the movement, you didn’t startle as Yoongi scooted closer to you on the rock and gently, softly, ran a large, warm hand up and down your spine. Yoongi inwardly noted that your bones were perhaps sticking out a little too far, that maybe you’ve skipped one too many meals lately. Or maybe, you didn’t have access to them. He wasn’t sure. He had no idea what kind of home you lived in. He had limited information, and most of it was about your father. That thought made him remember something, “Pearl?” Yoongi whispered cautiously, not sure how you would react to him having this knowledge. Hoping that you would find some sort of comfort in it, since your friends and mother called you that.

You immediately stopped sniffling, body going stiff as a board. You sat up abruptly and looked Yoongi dead in the eyes, “What did you call me?” He could see the red rims of your swollen eyes, dried tear tracks being covered by new ones and another piece of his heart cracked off, swallowed by the ocean of his chest.

“Pearl,” he uttered again, a little more confidently, “isn’t that your nickname?”

“H-how?” You stuttered, staring into his vast ocean eyes. They held more emotion than you were accustomed to, coming from him. You gently shook your head back and forth to dislodge the tears that were gathering at the corners.

Yoongi visibly blushed at your question, quickly avoiding your gaze and turning his head to the side and removing his hand from your back. You momentarily missed the warmth. He looked like he was gazing out at the water, but you could tell he was embarrassed. You narrowed your eyes at him. What was he hiding? “Yoongi?” You sniffled again, which caught his attention. He bit his cheek and looked at you through his lashes.

“I- I’m sorry.”

You were even more confused now. “For?”

“Everything,” he let out an exasperated sigh, “for yelling at you last night, for acting like sending you to Big Hit was a good idea, and…” he trailed off. You waited a moment, tears forgotten as you listened to the man be sincere for the first time since you met him, “for going through your phone.” His words were quiet, so quiet you almost asked him to repeat himself, but after a moment realization hit you.

“Y- you went through my phone?” Long gone was the remorse you felt for leaving your friends, the sorrow you felt at possibly losing your family. In its place, was anger. An ugly, red monster that was brewing in your chest. A part of you knew it was irrational, but the other part knew that he wouldn’t be ashamed if he didn’t feel like he did something wrong. This man, who yelled at you, made you feel small, made you think you didn’t matter… had invaded your privacy. Namjoon promised he would shut off service to your phone, making it untraceable. He promised it would be safe in their hands. You wouldn’t let your mind trace this back to Namjoon, no. He did nothing wrong. You were angry at the blonde sitting in front of you, wide-eyed with a mouth shaped like an “o”.

He shook himself out of the momentary shock at your reaction, “Y- yes,” he dragged out before quickly adding, “and I’m so sorry YN, really I am. It was wrong of me, and I know that. I know that! I just…”

You cut him off before he could finish that thought, “If you knew it was wrong, why did you do it?”

There was a deep ‘v’ forming on your forehead. The face you wore didn’t resemble someone who was angry, more concerned. Or disappointed. Yeah, that was the right word, Yoongi thought. He felt small in this moment, like he was a child being scolded for stealing cookies. He sighed and looked down at his hands folded in his lap.

“I was scared,” was all he could come up with at the moment, feeling so incredibly guilty and having no other way to express it to you.

“Scared?” You scoffed, he hasn’t been acting very scared. In fact, it seemed more like he was putting on a tough guy persona to try and scare you. “Of what, exactly?” You were feeling brazened now, these boys were really bringing out the sides of you, weren’t they?

A beat passed before Yoongi uttered, “Of losing my soulmates.”

The anger you were feeling just moments ago, dissipated in tiny fractures until all that was left in its wake was empathy for the man sitting across from you. For the first time since you met him, you felt like you saw Yoongi’s rock solid wall, crack slightly. His expression was still blank, like usual, but there was something in his eyes that was calling out to you, for help. He was just like the others. Scared, alone, worried. He found a home in these men, his best friends, maybe even his lovers. Something you were just starting to realize you might be finding in them, too. You were all alike, in some way or another. All felt like you didn’t belong, and here, with each other, you did belong. If you could feel that, you can’t imagine what Yoongi must feel for the others, having spent so much time with them.

You look away from Yoongi’s eyes, staring out at the water like he had been moments ago, cracking under the pressure of his intense gaze. Biting your lip to keep the dam from breaking again you whisper, “I shouldn’t be here.”

Yoongi wasn’t sure if he heard you correctly, but after a moment realized what you had meant by that. “That’s not what I meant, YN,” he sighed and ran a hand down his face, “really, it’s not.”

“No, I know, Yoongi,” you started, not turning to look at him just yet, “I’ve been thinking about it all day. I don’t want to walk in here and ruin what you guys have, get in the way of your friendships, or relationships,” you blushed at the insinuation, “I should go home. We don’t even know if my parents know anything, or if they even planned on giving me to Big Hit. I’m an adult, I can make my own decisions, they know that.”

Yoongi started to panic, not just because he knew Seokjin and Jungkook would be crushed if you chose to leave, but because he knew you didn’t know the whole truth. Should he tell you? Namjoon would kill him. He didn’t want to disappoint his best friend, his savior, his love. But, he also didn’t want to possibly endanger you by allowing you to return home. He was already starting to care deeply for you and was terrified of the possibility of you getting hurt. “YN -” he started before sucking his lips between his teeth, contemplating his next words. At his silence, you removed your gaze from the quarry and turned towards the nervous looking man. He was wringing his wrist between the fingers of his other hand, a nervous tick.

You looked at him expectantly through long lashes, eyes still red rimmed from crying away most of the day. Yoongi still thought you looked ethereal, especially with the way the moon was reflecting in your eyes. It was like he could see the entire galaxy staring back at him, and it made him feel things he didn’t want to feel right now. Not when he was about to break your heart.

“YN I, I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to go back. I know you don’t trust me,” he rushed out, making sure you weren’t going to cut him off again, “just let me explain why I’m saying this. I haven’t made the greatest impression on you, and for that I really am sorry. Like I said, I was scared. That’s not an excuse to treat someone poorly, but I hope you can understand that I love the others more than I love myself.”

Your eyes softened at his confession. You could see the love they shared for each other, but hearing him say it really solidified your observations. “Namjoon isn’t telling you the whole truth,” he noticed your eyes go wide, at mentally slapped himself for the poor choice of words before quickly saying, “it’s not what you think! You are like us. You are different. And you are in danger. But Namjoon knew if he told you just how much danger you were in, you probably wouldn’t trust him. He’s not a bad guy, in fact, he’s the exact opposite. He’s saved my life once before and I’m positive he’d do the same for you.”

If you weren’t confused before, you sure as hell are now. They were lying to you? “YN, your parents,” he let out another sigh hating the words he was about to say, “they are the ones lying to you. Hyunwoo and your father weren’t classmates. They worked together,” he felt like a traitor, like he was letting Namjoon down, “he’s a beneficiary of Big Hit. They’re already paying for you.”

To be continued...

taglist: @minifruity @mrcleanheichou @arantxaglz @chim-possible @kooksremedy @irishhbamb @sugashaye @lovelyseomin

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mistmiyuki · 5 years ago

Text

Does Baekmorae Truly Think Raptor Will Love Him? A Character Analysis of Blakemore’s Perceived ‘Selfishness’

**SPOILERS FOR I DON’T WANT TO BE THIS KIND OF HERO**

While I was reading idwtkoh, I was bothered that Baekmorae didn’t seem to acknowledge he didn’t have a concrete realistic plan to get Raptor back. He was clearly intelligent enough to know she would not go from hate to love (or maybe he thought she would? Considering he toed that line himself with his relationship with the Doctor. Respect for him as a person, and hate about what he was doing and making Baekmorae do).

Raptor also has a lover in Haze that Morae recognises is too important to her to ever kill. So why, despite Raptor’s clear dislike of Beakmorae, would he continue to try and make her love him? Why would he think she ever would when he continued to do evil and cruel things?

In the flashback Raptor basically said to Baekmorae that the happiness he felt killing someone was something he shouldn’t be ashamed of or die for (she didn’t mean killing in general of course, she meant killing someone who abused you specifically). Alongside internalising the immortal mindset from number 2 that it’s a right and an instinct for creatures to want a prosperous life, and that it’s natural for creatures to kill each other for their own survival (which just explains how they see humans as simple creatures that can’t be morally faulted for all wrongdoings, and is why they won’t necessarily hate a human who kills people). He mixed those and believed it’s natural to kill others for the sake of his own pleasure and desires. However, ultimately the immortals are selfless in complete contrast to Baekmorae.

So to explain my theory as to why he may act this way toward Raptor despite her clear permanent hate:

It also bothered me that Baekmorae went from a nice caring person who could barely stand the thought of people being hurt. The kind of person that wishes to 'punish' himself by sleeping in that room to lay witness to it because of his immense guilt....and then...just becoming someone who would happily kill all people other than the doctor who caused that guilt so quickly??

Baekmorae is someone who will just do what others tell him to. Specifically, what the people he respects will tell him to do. Even though his friends and basically siblings walked away after finding out about the experiments, he respected the doctor and number 2 more as people he should follow. He had the choice to leave, to report them, to fight for those tortured people. But he didn’t. He stayed. For the people he respected. He decided that was more important. If Number 2 told him to leave he would have. You could argue he lived with no will of his own. No 'selfishness'.

And therefore, when Raptor came around and said, 'you can live for yourself, you can feel happiness and live despite doing bad things', he felt he could finally live 'selfishly'. He threw away any part of himself that was selfless and caused him pain in his trauma, his good natured heart, his love for children, his desire to teach the next generation, his guilt of others being hurt. He has no mid-ground. He is other doing everything for others while sacrificing his own happiness, or everything for himself while sacrificing the happiness of others.

But is that completely true? What did he actually want and mattered most to him before he became a researcher? Probably to have respect from his teacher and the doctor. He wanted to be a teacher himself and liked children, so you could argue he gave that up selflessly for the sake of the doctor. But really it's more he had a greater desire to please the people he looked up to. He was still following his desires technically even if he thought he was being ‘selfless’. it just came at the sacrifice of his nature as a good person and his sanity. Maybe a part of the reason he stayed as a researcher was because he felt the actions of the doctor and number 2 were his responsibility because he continued to respect them despite their horrid actions.

What is most interesting to me is that he hasn't changed in many ways despite it looking like he did a 180. His insanity and mind break led him to throwing away his past self to live selfishly in the way Raptor specifically told him to. And that's the catch isn't it?

He is STILL DOING WHAT PEOPLE TELL HIM TO.

He still isn't making decisions and acting based on what he wants necessarily. He still, still, will only live the way specific others tell him to.

So if he doesn't have Raptor anymore, if he has to accept she hates him and won't ever come back, that he does not have her approval (the approval of someone he respects, which mind you, seems to be his biggest desire that has led to him throwing away important parts of himself. First teaching, second his empathy),

Then what is he living for?

During the time of the main story he cannot go back to teaching, he cannot go back to the doctor or his teacher which he killed. So other than raptor he has nothing else. What selfish desires could he actually strive for because she was his only purpose for becoming the way he is anyway. She was the one that helped him let go of his guilt as a researcher. If he doesn't have her to use as an excuse would all that guilt come back? Would it be worse because he didn't even save them, he killed them?

He has reached a point of no return. To protect himself from despair he must love her. He must get her back. Even if there is not chance at all.

And therefore, he is blinded to his own reality. Not accidentally, or by force. He has chosen to blind himself from that truth.

The truth that he is a husk that made many mistakes and threw out his individual motivators to do what others told him, who made that same mistake again to kill tortured lab rats because someone told him to chase that pleasure. Who tells himself he is selfishly going after his desires.

And it IS selfish. But in the same ways he acted ‘selfishly’ before. To get that approval from people he admires is above ALL ELSE.

And despite thinking it’s natural and okay for him to reach this desire by killing others, he did not achieve any of them at all. He was selfish with no gain. Not for anyone.

#이런영웅은싫어 #I don't want this kind of hero #i dont want this kind of hero #idwtkoh #meta #webcomic meta #manhwa #text post #long post #raptor #baekmorae #character analysis #spoilers

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gingerwritess · 5 years ago

Note

Ok crazy thought. So if the last predating is to go through with Loki being tortured and reader saving the day like a boss, would Loki be hooked up to machines? More specifically a heart rate monitor? That for some reason increases when you get close? And goes ballistic when you touch him?

part 17, in which you absolutely snap

warnings: a big phat long chapter, prisoner situations, lots of emotions, the beginnings of tension, and big reactions

You’re mad—but you’re not exactly sure if you’re supposed to be.

Technically you didn’t kiss Loki. You kissed Laing, and it was all part of keeping up your cover, so automatically…no strings attached.

But the so-called god now strapped to the hospital bed a few doors down is definitely the one who’s lips had been on yours, at one time or another.

He’s also the highly dangerous criminal wanted by most of the worlds officials, who you also at one point let shower in your home, sleep under your desk, sat on his lap, brushed his hair, fed him, clothed him, patched him up—

Sheesh, that’s enough.

You scrub at your mouth with your shirt sleeve, blanching at the memory of almost liking it.

Now—and you really shouldn’t be surprised—you get to answer for it all.

Thor is not helping.

“I knew it,” he announces and points a finger at you. “You are attracted to him! You like him in a physical, romantic sense of the word—”

“God, no, that’s–that’s not even close—”

“Easy, Thor.”

Luckily Tony shuts the other god up while you bury your face in your hands.

After Loki had passed out, you’d been escorted—in a much gentler fashion than he was—to a crisp white holding cell and given some remedies to try and sober you up as best they can.

You recognised it to be an interrogation room, much like the one you’d seen Loki cursed to before this whole thing got blown to hell, but at this point, you can’t care.

Steve is the first to come question you (probably because he’s the only completely sober one), and the first thing you can think to blurt is “don’t hurt him.”

Then you mentally smack yourself across the face—they already saw you kissing him. Now this?

Maybe Thor was right.

“I have to ask,” the captain slowly starts, “was the motivation of your…partnership…romantic?”

Even with how furiously you deny it, you still don’t think he believes you.

The night becomes morning before you know it, filled with endless questions and exhausting interrogations, which you answered completely truthfully and to the best of your ability.

Even taking the liberty to include some of Loki’s story.

When Thor was in the room, you jumped on the opportunity to describe just how beat up his brother is and how he’s been covering it up because of some “target” on his back, how he’s been lying through his teeth about every motivation for the attack, how he needs help.

You’re still mad—you’re mad at Loki for refusing to talk for so long, for being so damn stubborn he nearly got himself killed, and now for dragging you this deeply into the newest villainous conspiracy.

…and for becoming himself when you kissed him.

Kissing Loki was never the plan; you didn’t mind kissing Laing.

The sun is fully risen by the time you’ve covered the whole story from day one, almost down to every detail—the avengers don’t need to know how many times you accidentally saw him shirtless—and you still have a team of people grilling you.

Marcus lounges against the doorframe, gun limp in his hands and visor down, most likely to cover his eyes as he tries to catch a few winks of sleep, but another guard walks in and they both shoot to attention—a bit groggily.

“He’s awake,” she says, “and he said he wants to speak with all of you immediately.”

Your head shoots off the interrogation table with a start. “Huh??”

“You stay here,” Tony instructs, gut twisting when your face falls. “Look, I’m sorry, but as far as we know now, you’re in kahoots with a criminal. We have to take every precaution, alright? Just while we get this figured out.”

“Tony, he’s been lying—”

“I know, I know, you’ve told us.” He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “But we’ve got hardly any proof of that. Give us some time.”

Motioning for the two guards to follow them, Steve, Tony, Bruce, a pretty hungover Clint, Natasha, and Thor head out, leaving you in the cell to freak out about what the next few hours hold by yourself.

You’ll be fired, without a doubt. Even if Loki does admit to any of what you told them, you still aided in his deception.

Damn it, why did you have to let him sleep under your desk??

Who in their right mind agrees to that?!

Worst case scenario, you stay in jail for a good chunk of your life. Loki will either be in the same position or worse—if he was that adamant about not returning to Asgard, you figure it’s execution that awaits him there.

Or something worse. They’re gods, they probably have something much worse.

The little cot is relatively comfortable; this isn’t a jail cell, technically. It’s a holding cell, for…characters of interest.

Which is now you, apparently.

Thanks, Loki.

It’s comfortable enough, and you slip into a dreamless slumber within minutes.

—

Eyes on you bring you back to the land of the living, that eerie, squirmy feeling that you’re being watched.

And you are: stifling a yawn and blinking to clear your eyes, you sit up to find Clint and Thor staring at you through the cell windows.

You can kind of understand why Loki hated it. It’s an awful feeling, being a trapped specimen to be watched and studied.

It’s Tony who opens the cell door, and followed closely by Thor and Clint, he leads you to a couch this time, not the interrogation table.

“What happened, what’d he say?”

Tony laughs uncomfortably, chewing his lip.

“This…isn’t going to be easy for you to hear,” he carefully tells you, stepping around his words. “You, uh, you were influenced in this whole ordeal.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” You laugh, looking around to each of their somber expressions. “C’mon, we were all a little drunk.”

“Not like that.” Tony sighs and presses his palms to his eyes. “You were, for lack of a better term, mind controlled. Loki had you under his flying monkey spell, he admitted to the whole thing.”

You gape at him, trying to process what he just said. “I was not—”

“I know it’s hard to hear,” Clint cuts in. “It’s an awful feeling. But he made me his right hand man, so…you’re not alone in this. Loads of us were affected by it, too.”

Mind controlled. This whole time??

You fall back against the couch with a thud, mind reeling.

He hadn’t mind controlled you. Sure, he threatened it, but you made every one of your decisions perfectly consciously. You chose to let him come over, you chose to feed him, and yes, you’re paying for it now, but everything you saw with your own two eyes and remember vividly as your own.

He did kind of coerce you into pretending to date him, and it was a little more like blackmail, and yeah, he did try to alter your memory, and–and…

“Shit.”

“We’ll give you a moment,” Tony quickly offers, patting you on the shoulder. “Clint is here if you need a companion with similar experience, don’t be afraid to talk through this.”

“Nooo, this can’t—”

“The good news is you’re in the clear!” The false cheeriness is anything but reassuring. “You don’t have to stay here if you don’t want to, but we do have some support, or therapy kind of things for people he hurt this way.”

You stare at Tony, then at Clint.

You’d seen footage of the assassin when he was under Loki’s control: terrifying and exceptionally believable, but nothing like what you looked like.

You take a deep breath and turn on Thor.

“Have you even thought to go talk to him??”

“Of course,” Thor immediately answers, brow furrowing. “He refuses to talk, he won’t say any more than what he wants to say.”

“But have you shown an interest in wanting the truth??”

“He’s the god of lies,” he exclaims, glaring right back at you.

Shoving up in the face of the god of thunder was never something you thought would happen, but here we are.

“That doesn’t mean anything, argh, you two are so stuck in your god complex—”

“Truth has never been his way,” Thor interrupts. “I tried to warn you he would do something like this, you can’t actually be surprised this happened.”

“Actually, I am, because apparently I’m the only person in here with an ounce of sense—you know what?” You drop your accusing finger and laugh. “Screw this. I wasn’t mind controlled.”

Then you turn on your heel and sprint down the hall to find Loki.

He’s being kept in a what’s basically a lab, and ten times worse than a cell: strapped at the wrists and ankles, he’s restrained to the bed but propped up slightly, an array of needles in his arms and cords reaching for monitors from his chest, and worst, a stupid little smirk on the lips you wish you hadn’t kissed.

“You little shit,” you hiss the moment you’re through the door. If it weren’t for the injuries still hiding beneath his facade, you’d slap him, but you resolve to grabbing the cup of water by the bed and throwing it in his face.

That wipes the smirk right off his face.

“You didn’t mind control me!”

Sputtering and shocked, he opens his mouth—

“No,” you snap, shoving a finger in his face. “No more bullshit, you didn’t mind control me. I saved your ass and I did it by choice. And I don’t regret it! You didn’t have any say in that, and yeah, you threatened it, but I never let you.”

Thor and the others crash through the doorway after you and come to a screeching halt as your rant rages.

Loki’s eyes flicker to them and for a split second he considers just taking all his strength and leaving—this can’t end well.

“Don’t even think about it,” you warn, and lean over him with a gaze so threatening and fiery the heart monitor next to him starts beeping steadily faster.

You pretend not to notice.

“I’m trying to help you,” he whispers, trying to keep up the cocky facade, but his eyes almost plead. “Trust me—”

“Trust you.”

You turn to Thor with a hysterical, exhausted laugh. “He wants me to trust him!”

The other God’s face twists in confusion.

“I don’t trust you,” you spit back at Loki. “You haven’t earned that, but I don’t want you to die, either.”

Loki’s eyebrows lift, water droplets clinging to their curve.

“Why?”

Clenching your eyes shut and chewing your bottom lip, the right words just won’t come to you.

“It’s a valid question,” Thor helpfully adds from the doorway—and in that moment, you silence a god with one burning look.

“Because I don’t—I haven’t found any…ugh.”

“See,” Loki cuts in, “alterations to the mind—”

“Because I already should’ve killed you,” you blurt, then clap a hand over your mouth, eyes wide.

Nobody moves, all staring as you try to sort through everything that’s come to light.

“The day I first saw you,” you grit out, glaring at the stubborn god, “I wanted to hurt you, I wanted you to die and I made a stupid judgement call and decided that’s what should happen.”

“Thanks,” Loki dryly remarks.

“Shut up. I shot you, that time you showed up in my office, and I really thought I–I shot you—but, um, you didn’t die.”

Your hands clench into fists by your thighs.

“And now I have to live with that guilt, even though it didn’t actually go through. So…I don’t want you to die, ‘cause after everything you’ve failed to hide from me, I don’t think you deserve to.”

The room falls silent, and Loki shifts uncomfortably on his pillow.

Damn it all to hell, maybe you were mind controlled. Where did that come from??

“Sorry,” you mumble; then with one last decision, refill the cup with water and fling it in his face again.

Just for…everything’s sake.

You flop into the nearest chair and drop your head into your hands with a groan.

“So…”

Tony clears his throat, gaze falling on Loki.

He’s never seen the god trying so hard to look like himself.

“You better start freaking talking.”

Loki considers it for half a moment—eyes flitting to you and really weighing the options—and with a twitch of his lips, his restraints fade and he stands.

“Mm…no.”

The plan was to fade into nothing and leave them all grasping for him right at that moment, but you’re on him in an instant, tackling him back onto the bed.

“YOU’RE GOING TO FUCKING TALK,” you screech, pinning him to the mattress. “YOU’RE GOING TO TELL THE TRUTH AND WE’RE GOING TO HELP YOU, YOU LITTLE—”

“Fine, fine, norns,” he gasps, struggling to catch your arms and flip the tables, “gods, woman, STOP—”

Thor moves to grab you, but you finally come to a stop simply holding Loki’s shoulders down—and straddling his hips, you realise, but like, professionally.

The heart rate monitor is going ballistic, and Loki can’t glare up at you with enough venom.

“You are the stupidest, most disdainful midgardian I have ever encountered—”

“Oh, cause all your interactions with mortals were so great,” you scoff, pressing down harder on his shoulders. “I’m sure all your subjects would agree—”

“Hey,” Tony cuts in, stepping closer to the two of you—on top of each other on a bed, you remember. Oh well. “What the hell is happening right now??”

“Loki is going to drop all his magic shit, right now.”

“Like Hel I am,” the god under you spits.

“Take it off,” you order and give him a good shake, “all of them, off, no magic.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Do it, dipshit—”

“No.”

“Yes!”

“No!” He mimics, that sick grin back on his face. “There’s no point at all��what are you doing??”

Practically ripping his shirt open, to be specific, and Thor gasps, positively scandalised by the image you can only imagine this looks like.

The beeping of his heart rate speeds to a ridiculous amount and you actually catch a deep flush spreading over his face; pushing the shirt from his shoulders, you climb off of him and take advantage of his fluster to shove him onto his side.

“HAH.”

You point in triumph at his back as he scrambles to pull the blanket over himself.

Gaze falling on the array of something on his brother’s back, Thor holds out a hand to summon mjolnir with a whoosh and a thud; he grabs Loki to push him onto his stomach before he can get away, and sets the hammer right on his butt.

“You have got to be joking.”

“Nice trick,” you tell Thor, clapping him on the shoulder before moving to stand beside Loki. “See? Told you.”

Thor moves first, stepping closer and reaching out a hand to poke one of the barely scabbed cuts on his brother’s back—you catch his wrist before he can.

“That’ll hurt.”

He can’t speak a word, silently staring at the plethora of half-bloody lashes striking across his brother’s skin. You can’t blame him.

“I hate every single one of you,” Loki announces from his pillow, still struggling to move. “You will pay dearly for this—”

“Yeah, yeah,” you cut in dismissively, “we know, you’re a big, tough, scary god. Now shush.”

You can practically hear him gritting his teeth together, no doubt holding himself back.

“So…someone did this to you?” Tony asks, cautiously scanning the god for other signs of abuse.

“No, I did it to myself, Iron Man.”

“Sorry, bad wording. Mind telling us who the hell we should be searching for, if it’s not you?”

“Thor, get your precious hammer off my arse—”

“C’mon, Thor.” You wave him over with a nod. “Let him talk to us when he can face us, I think he’s thoroughly humiliated.”

Thor removes the hammer, and you help Loki struggle to pull himself onto his pillows and face the rest of the group.

Most of the team has joined now, no doubt hearing the screaming matches from ten floors up, and sit sparsely around the little lab, waiting.

Finally situated, Loki draws in a slow breath, casting his gaze around the room at the somber faces.

You can’t help but notice when he makes eye contact with Clint and immediately gets a burning death glare in return—it only makes sense, after what Loki, or who you thought to be Loki, did to him.

“Talk to us,” you whisper, perching on the edge of his hospital bed.

The beeping from the heart rate monitor picks up in the slightest.

This time, you glance over to watch the little spikes get closer and closer together as Loki, the god of lies you almost killed, decides to tell the truth.

—

There’s a new air sitting heavy in the little room when Loki finishes, slumping back onto his pillows in defeat.

No one responds, and you don’t think anyone wants to.

To your surprise, Clint breaks the silence.

“No one should ever have their conscience ripped apart,” he states flatly, void of emotion and staring at the wall. “But you’ve got a long ways to go before you have my respect or forgiveness.”

That gets a couple nods scattered around the room.

“I am not asking for forgiveness,” Loki says, steeling himself. “And I certainly don’t need your respect. Just punish me, release me, kill me, make a decision.”

Steve stands with a slow exhale, gaze hard as concrete. “I think we need a moment,” he tells Loki, turning to nod to the rest of the team. “Thank you for your honesty. We’ll see to it that you’re healed, but past that…we’ll get back to you.”

Tony stands, too, shakey and deep in thought.

“Sorry you got pulled into this,” he says to you with a small smile. “But thanks for all your help. And thanks for jumping him, I don’t think he would’ve talked if you hadn’t.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it.” You point to the silent god next to you. “Thanks for believing me and letting him talk.”

Thor has yet to speak.

The rest of the team trickles out of the room, eventually leaving just the two of you and a couple guards stationed outside the door.

You certainly don’t want to talk first, so you slip off his hospital bed and wait uncomfortably by his bedside.

Not sure what you’re expecting, to be completely honest.

Maybe an apology for…everything, but your hopes aren’t too high.

Loki just picks at the palm of one hand, staring holes into the wall.

You clear your throat. “Well, I’m gonna go—”

“Thank you.”

That gets you to freeze. “Excuse me?”

“Thank you,” he repeats, still refusing to look at you. “I owe you a great deal.”

“I mean, I did try to kill you, so I think we’re even—”

“You’ve kept me alive,” he cuts in, “when I didn’t even want to be. That…annoyed me at the time, but if this is another chance they decide to give me, I–I suppose I owe it to you.”

It’s not an apology, but you’ll absolutely take it.

“Well.” Fighting back a smile, you drop your gaze to your hands. “Sorry for–for shooting you. And tasing you. And all that stuff.”

“Don’t be.”

A relieved breath lifts your chest and you give him a small smile.

“Mind if I stay a bit?” You point at the couch in the room, “I’m exhausted.”

He nods, fishing around in the blankets for his shirt again—it’s on the floor, but you find yourself deciding not to share that with him.

“Be my guest.”

You can’t help the sigh that leaves your lips as you sink into the cushions, as uncomfortable as they may be.

Maybe, for once, when you wake up, you can begin your normal life again, with no fake boyfriends and world-threatening secrets.

Then you remember you kissed a god last night.

Who’s still shirtless on a hospital bed, barely an arm’s reach from you.

“Loki?”

“What?”

“You passed out after I kissed you,” you grin, closing your eyes. “In case you didn’t remember.”

“And your point?” He doesn’t exactly sound happy to be reminded, but the beeping of his heart rate monitor speeds up again and tells differently.

“I gotta ask. If you passed out, how long has it been since—”

“Centuries,” Loki blurts much too quickly, and the beeping might’ve reached a concerning level. “Cut me some slack.”

“Centuries,” you repeat with a low whistle. “Well then.”

“It wasn’t because of that,” he assures you, wishing you’d just change the subject. “I was knocked out right afterwards by a guard, a fist straight to the head.”

“Right.” You smile at the ceiling, eyes still closed. “Definitely wasn’t the kiss.”

“Of course not.”

His heart rate hasn’t slowed.

Loki takes one look at the scribbled lines flashing furiously on the monitor and promptly rips the cords from his chest.

“Right.”

― ― ― ―

fuel the writer?

~ masterlist link in my bio ~

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anxiouslyfred · 5 years ago

Text

Mold on Me

for @dukexietyweek‘s prompt High School, I have no clue how american schools work so I’m just going with what I know.

Summary: Virgil had only heard about Remus as a kid who annoyed his friends in their classes but after finally seeing what the other student looks like and meeting him is torn between hiding away or trying to get to know Remus better. Remus is already decided on meeting the snarky student again, if only to learn his name.

Warnings: Knife mentions, Food mentions?, unsafe science lab practices mentioned,

/\/\/\/\/\

Virgil had been bullied badly when he was younger. It was why he hated being around the more populated areas of the school and now basically lived in the Library as much as he could. That didn’t mean he was against making friends, just that they’d usually be the ones deciding to make friends and he just wouldn’t question it at all.

“He almost blew up the lab today. Why did I have to get partnered with someone who clearly has no regard for any form of safety? Even when I stopped him and tried to correct the experiment from where he’d mixed all the chemicals up he was literally taking the ones I was trying to return to mix together again!” Logan had been ranting for most of their breaktime by this point. Virgil didn’t really mind, and actually was kind of curious about the student in question.

He hadn’t had a class with Remus King before but already knew plenty of views about him, just because his 2 friends shared different classes with him. Logan’s complaints were always regarding some form of danger or safety protocol but Patton’s were where his interest came from.

The food technology class that Patton shared with Remus did have a lot of interesting assignments getting set at various times, including making savoury ice creams near the time of the open evenings so they could, essentially, prank the children wondering if this would be a good school for them to come to next. Patton had somehow managed to make one that tasted delicious but Virgil still couldn’t work out if the flavour combination he’d been told Remus made only sounded disgusting or actually tasted horrible too.

“Dude, surely the teach would have stopped him if it was that dangerous.” Virgil just couldn’t be bothered to add something more to his list of reasons not to trust the teachers. It was already too long for his comfort and Logan was never one to help.

Patton at least caught onto that and came up with a subject to divert their conversation onto for the rest of their break.

/\/\

The next time Virgil thought about Remus was a few days later as their lunch break ended and he was heading into the science block for his physics class. Patton hadn’t made it out to lunch that day since his food technology class was either side of it so they’d have more time for the practical lessons.

It at least made the corridor Virgil was passing down smell delightfully of chocolate but he was far more interested in, and slightly terrified by, the boy kicking the door of the food tech classroom open, storming down the classroom, yelling “It’s knife work! What about that can’t be turned into uses for a weapon? What planet are you from that blades and any work from them isn’t two steps from a use to attack or torture another!”

One last thought Virgil had about Remus was that his friends were disasters at describing what any human looked like. According to Logan, the boy had obviously dyed his hair and ignored any attempt his parents or brother made to teach him personal hygiene. Patton was a little kinder, saying Remus had a lovely wide grin and energetic eyes, although Virgil was still trying to figure out just what that meant.

His mental image so far had been of some slightly crossed-eyed younger version of the Joker from Batman, but the boy fitting all the stories he’d heard of Remus looked nothing less than gorgeous.

“They’re from the Health and Safety state, Dude. We’re meant to have forgotten the threatening uses of knives we use in cooking unless we are the ones being threatened by them.” Virgil muttered his reply, to anxious about being noticed to say it any louder.

He still got noticed and the boy halting in front of him. “Someone in this damn school gets it! Come join us in class!” Virgil didn’t have much of a choice to disagree as his arm was grabbed and he got dragged into the classroom, sheepishly waving to Patton when the other students turned to look at the rapid return.

“Mr King, I’ve told you before that you cannot drag your friends into here even on a lunch break.” the teacher sighed, confirming Virgil’s assumption over who it was.

“I actually was heading to class anyway. There’s only like 2 minutes left before...” Virgil began explaining, tugging on his arm to get it released just as the bell went off to officially end the lunch period. “Yeah. I guess I’ll have to properly meet you some other time, Remus.”

He ducked out of the classroom before anything else could be said, letting the flow of other students heading to class calm the spiralling emotions and only just hearing “No fair, I’ll learn your name next time, Stachybotrys.” yelled after him.

If only the insane boy wasn’t proving to be exactly Virgil’s type perhaps he’d have learnt something about physics that day.

/\/\

Logan was not amused when he reached their table today. “Do either of you know if Remus means a person or the mold when he mentions Stachbotrys? I have had to argue constantly to get any progress on our study for the entirity of our class.”

“I met him for like two minutes. That should not be enough time for him to have anything to say about me.” Virgil growled, hunching back into his hoodie.

“He met Virgil while trying to storm out of food tech yesterday. Apparently our anxious bean muttered something in agreement of what he was yelling about knives.” Patton added what more he could at Logan’s raised eyebrow.

At least amusement was replacing Logan’s frustration now, a smile clearly being held back. “At least I didn’t try suggesting he locates the mold on rice then. Remus does seem rather insistent that and I’m paraphrasing here, he’s going to find and make his the Stachbotrys that is all he could think of last night.”

There aren’t quite words for everything Virgil wanted to say to that, so in the attempt he let out a rather strangled noise, burying his head in his arms. He could take having a crush on a complete whirlwind maniac who seemed to drive both his friends up the wall but having even the merest suggestion the affections could be returned was too much to understand.

“If he brings it up next time we share class I’ll suggest visiting the library to look up the subject, shall I?” Logan offered. Virgil made a mental note that there had now been 3 instances of teasing pushed too much by the boy who insisted he only ever acted logically.

/\/\

“I don’t need to read about mold but my science partner has decided if I’m going to talk about my Stachybotrys so much our experiments can easily be adjusted to focus on mold.” Remus’s voice was loud as he marched over to the helpdesk in the library and Virgil was just grateful he had decided to read at one of the tables hidden among the shelves while waiting for his lift to arrive. “Apparently that means I do need books to source the information I already know so which shelves am I looking for?”

Definitely not the area Virgil was in. The shelves near him included cultures of the world, and how to books for various creative hobbies. The only thing that seemed even remotely likely to interest Remus were the history of war books near the end of the isle but they didn’t connect to mold at all.

Virgil’s reasoning and frantic checking that he could hopefully avoid the other boy distracted him enough that he didn’t realise Remus looking through the shelves opposite him. “Stachybotrys! I found you again!” He couldn’t miss the exclamation though.

“Didn’t realise we were playing hide and seek. I thought I was writing an essay for English Lit.” Virgil hissed back, really not wanting to give the librarian any cause to kick him out.

“Ooh, what’s it on? And what’s your name? You’ve been on my mind like a mold and it would be nice to have the right name for the newest mold I’ve encountered.” Remus clearly didn’t care about making some noise although he did quiet down dramatically when he saw how uncomfortable the noise was making Virgil.

“I’m Virgil though I’m fairly sure you’ve already got my friends convinced Stachybotrys should just be a nickname for me now.” He was actually annoyed at that.

Patton always butchered the word, and would only try to use it when mentioning how besotted he thought Remus was since the only diversion of subject in their food tech class recently had been how the molds of different foods could make people sick or kill them.

Logan on the other hand would just randomly use the name for Virgil in the hopes Remus would be somewhere close by to hear him. That had never worked since Virgil was either in class, outside to eat or in the library.

Remus peered at him a little. “Still fits though. You definitely appear like a threat but ultimately leaving the world undecided over how dangerous you are. So assuming Logan’s one of your friends, who is the other I’ve got calling you it? And do they think I have a chance at dating you?”

“Patton and are you seriously asking me if my friends think you should ask me out? Dude, if you want to date me just ask me if I want to go on a date. Or is being ridiculously convoluted a game of yours?” Virgil scolded, shaking his head, trying to decide if there was some kind of mind game happening in the moment or not.

“Okay then, Date me, Emo kid! We can go ravage a farm search for signs of mold and decay among all their crops and end with a picnic of snacks I invented recipes for in class!” Remus just shrugged at the tone, moving on to what was requested of him,

That was even further from Virgil’s expectations of the response than Logan saying Remus was set on finding him had been. Most people were at least a little put off by how harshly he reacted whe uncertain of situations. “Can we start with the food? My brain will just panic over how I could die from being close to mold and then eating if we do it your way round.”

“Of course we can. Let’s meet at Gorse Hill farm at like 2pm on Saturday for our date then!” Remus jumped up from his spot then, a wild grin on his face as he waved, heading off. “Can’t wait for it, Stachbotrys.”

#dukexietyweek2020 #dukexiety #remus sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #high school au

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