#i think what i want to capture most is like. esppp where sharena and peony split off when they reach a certain age

[moe-broey]

A closer look at my young Askr siblings designs! Sharena's kind of constantly fluctuates, but I've always had a really clear vision for an early teen Alfonse.

[moe-broey]

It's really difficult to be a character who's intrinsically tied to another, who's inseparable from them. Esppp when the other half seems like they'd be able to be independent without them (I have the hard stance that Alfonse would shit himself and die without Sharena though.) I think it's even MORE difficult when you've got girl character (who's intrinsically tied) and guy character (who seems more independent). LIKE. A LOT. Of baggage comes w this. You're up against potential misogyny from the writers. Even if it's not overt, you see it in favoritism (who gets to do what/be the driving force in the narrative). And I think to a degree there's a feedback loop, where if the writers don't give you a reason to care, you may not. Unless if you're like. Oppositional and stubborn about it. Which I've ALSO been in the position of w a handful of the FEH girlies LMFAO. BUT. Beyond the feedback loop, there's also just the male centric favoritism that happens in general, in fandom spaces. Dare I point at Three Houses. Oh god. Listen. I never completed a single route. But I love you Edelgard they can NEVER make me hate you.

Got slightly off topic, but. I esppp want to highlight my opener, here. That it's a really difficult position for a character to be in, story wise, and fan perception wise. Thinking about it bc I brought up Rosado's FBs, and how even in those it ties back to Alfonse.

But like. Man. I'll be real w you, I don't got a greater point or in-depth analysis or hot take. I just really have a soft spot for Sharena, because of this. To be a younger sibling, who's so heavily defined by that. In the way she's treated within her family, in the way she interacts with Alfonse. In almost every single action she takes. She adores him, looks up to him, and that just makes it sting even more, the way it's so clear that Alfonse is absolutely the "golden child" here. But god, it's crazy to me, that she's never resentful about it.

Also do NOT get me started on the Peony twist, but I can't help but think about her too after saying that actually. Like. Peony's defining characteristic that separated her from Triandra WAS that lack of resentment. Triandra wished for retribution, revenge, justice by her own hand. Most of all, she wished for a way to protect her little sister once and for all. Peony on the other hand, all her wishes were for comfort. Happiness and joy. Maybe even safety? But, I'm actually ALWAYS thinking about that one line between the Tana/Peony duo. Paralogue, I think -- okay found it LMFAOO BUT.

LIKE. TO BE SO HONEST. ESPPPP given the way Sharena and Peony were so indistinguishable as children. If this is an ideal Peony has held since she was a child, we could feasibly extend this to Sharena, and. It just perfectly illustrates what I'm getting at, here. Peony was never resentful, Sharena isn't resentful. Both of them have ALWAYS been about Lessening The Burden. Through being supportive, being an unwavering force of positivity, some solace in a shitty situation.

Idkkkkk I'm just. So talking out my ass, and I can never quite capture it. Another half-thought is the way people may write off optimistic sunshine characters as being less complex than your more overt Problems and Issues characters. Another reason I feel like Sharena WAS so looked over, I mean.

Okay confession time it's actually a pet peeve of mine. When people call back to the "I'm gonna kill you too" line from Alfonse too much. Like. I honestly cannot explain it but I get AUTISM MAD ABOUT IT. LIKE if you focus too much on that and that alone, I feel like you're disregarding ALL of the fucking context that led up to that. Context, that gives way to FOCAL. ESSENTIAL characterization notes. If you whittle him down just to that, you get something hollow.

So, why do I bring it up? BECAUSE. AND THIS IS PART OF THE FOCALNESS I WAS TALKING ABOUT. That whole show Alfonse put on for Letizia makes you stop in your tracks, leaves you stunned and speechless, maybe get a wave of "oooooohhhhhhhhhhhhh he's SO COOL", but to ME. What's important, is the way it makes you step back. Makes you think back to other instances where Alfonse jumps out w something crazy. And then you nod and go yeah no that tracks. Dude has been threatening to kill god since day one. He's always made calculated gambits like this, you see it in Book 3 (in before Gustav gives him hell for it, shattering his confidence almost completely). Also Reginn's ordeal. Also Seidr (considering killing her to stop Gulveig). And though this happens a book after, Ratatoskr. Ect ect ect ECT

AGAIN. WHY DO I BRING THIS UP. The thing is.... Sharena hasn't really had any moments even VAGUELY comparable to this. There's nothing that jumps out at you, makes you pause and look back. Her character is really... subtle, in a way. You have to look between the lines. And, you may have to go out of your way to revisit old moments to see how they track (like, nothing prompts you to do so -- it's just me and my autism-fueled commitment to a bit I have to get back to tbh aka my quotes blogs LMFAO). I think MAYBE the closest thing you get is her 40 convo, and the way you have to cross reference it with Katarina's arc (early paralogue), and f!Byleth's FBs. Two things I have yet to revisit actually myself, at least recently. BUT. Through how meaningful it was for Sharena to befriend Katarina (and subsequently how painful her betrayal was), and SO many of Sharena's interactions w Byleth that amounted to being Shocked when Byleth said, "Okay. We are Friends." Like. Like. It paints the greater picture, here. That DESPITE Sharena's social butterfly tendencies, she really does struggle with making connections. The way she's deeply lonely.

LIKE. LIKE. THE COMPLEXITY. IT'S THERE. I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD IT'S THERE. Godddd don't even get me started on how she struggles to be honest w herself and subsequently everyone else around her. The way Alfonse manages to make deep emotional ties, but Sharena just... can't. Because she struggles so bad just Being. By putting her best foot forward, she creates this paradox. If she can't be real with herself, how can she be real with anyone else? ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT. DOD VERONICA'S CASTLE LINE. About (roughly quoting) "Does Alfonse know what love is? Sharena clearly does not." LIKE. GIRL. THE VIOLENCE. BUT ALSO. Making that call SO confidently. When I get really insane I almost think about the potential lore implications of Sharena being excluded from the DOD banner (my beloathed), like, the In Universe implications. Yeah yeah The Twist, we all know it. But like. Is there something in that line, too...? Nothing will absolve that Choice (to not include her), but. The lore implications. Do fuck me up big time.

I FEEL LIKE. THAT'S ANOTHER THING TOO. AGAIN W READING BETWEEN THE LINES. THE SUBTLETY. To the point of looking for something that may not even be there. It drives me SO INSANE. I feel like (myself included) people start to go hard for Sharena BECAUSE of All This. The neglect/being overlooked, by the writing/game itself. You look between the lines out of spite. And I've reached a weird level of it where yes, that's where I Started, but it's another thing I get autism mad about now actually LMFAO LIKE??????? Whenever anyone points out the favoritism/overshadowing, I do get really defensive in a way???? And I can't even tell you why. Like NO. THERE'S MORE. I SWEAR TO GOD THERE'S MORE than just posturing about how Alfonse gets this that and the other and Sharena does not. It's true, but THERE'S MORE. YOU CAN'T JUST FOCUS ON THAT TO FOCUS ON THAT ALONE IS TO DISCREDIT HER TOO........,

Like. Maybe it's a mixture of feeling like "By pointing out how Alfonse overshadows her you're overshadowing her again" (FEELS slightly inaccurate esp bc I know that's not the goal when people do this. And again, that is where I started, so I Get It). But also. I think it ties back to my opening thoughts, again. "Who am I, without You?" and "My entire life I've loved you and looked up to you" and They're A Set. Do NOT Separate. Like... I think the identity issues are a core part of her, too. It's the emotional enmeshment. It's the co-dependency. It's more pronounced in her, maybe, because she's the younger one. She's also just more emotionally open about it? At least vocally, she expresses her affection through words. But I think these qualities are JUST as strong in Alfonse, too. Ergo, my stance of He would shit himself and die. Without her. You see it in his actions, and the way he may imprint on certain characters. Veronica/Thrasir being the go-to example, but I think it's also true for Reginn and Ratatoskr to varying degrees (ESP don't want to discount the Practicality. The Practicality is important to me).

Once again I fear I'm doing the exact thing I was complaining about (the overshadowing) but the THING IS. IS THAT. Alfonse and Sharena have an endless feedback loop of their own. You need to analyze each individually AND together, to get the Full Picture. They are like two halves of a whole.

Idk maybe it just boils down to like. Very loosely quoting/reffing this joke, but. If you told Mario you don't like Luigi he would be So Fucking Mad at you. If you told Luigi you don't like Mario he would cry. They're Mario and Luigi. To me.