#i think the worst part is that my smut writing does relatively well on here and on ao3
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don't you find it a little ironic that despite being a smut writer, all my favorite fics aren't smut-centric? that my favorite writing is always something that isn't to do with sex at all?
#cora talking#i write smut fast and dirty#but i cannot bear to write an overly emotional x reader fic#i leave that for my chara x chara fics#because i do not want to have to put myself through my own emotions#why would i want to relive all the heavy things i felt?#i think the worst part is that my smut writing does relatively well on here and on ao3#like everyone loves and vibes with it#and i do love writing it#and i do put hints of emotion in there#but ultimately it's just me avoiding the heaviness that actually comes w loving someone#and being intimate w them
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President Loki x reader: Trapped in the void
Summary: Youâre pruned and end up in the void. President Loki saves you from Alioth, but it comes at a price. You hope someone will save you from him. Eventually you meet another Loki variant who looks exactly like President Loki, but heâs very different.Â
A/N: Hey guys. If you remember my post sharing my thoughts on President Loki, I mentioned I was planning on writing more President Loki x reader one shots. This is an idea Iâve had thatâs darker than the one I wrote earlier. The reader is pruned and meets President Loki. He is not nice to her at all. Remember when I said I thought President Loki was Lokiâs worst traits in one package? I wanted to put some of that into this one shot. This will be a dark one shot and does not attempt to romanticize his actions toward her. Donât worry though. She has a happy ending. Warnings: Abusive relationship, implied sexual assault (itâs referenced, but not specific so no smut), verbal abuse, referenced periods of starvation. If any of this bothers you, you should probably skip this. Other than that I hope you like it :)
You woke up after being pruned in some strange place. âOh, and what do we have here?â It was a Loki variant, that much you knew. He was wearing a horned headpiece as if it was a crown. He was wearing a formal green suit with a âVote Lokiâ pen fastened on it. He looked you up and down, examining your appearance. âClearly youâre not a Loki. Youâre a Midgardian.â You saw a monster in the sky. âAnd that is Alioth, no one other than a Loki has survived here. These men are my lesser variants. I suppose you could say Iâm king here, or rather I soon will be. If youâre wise, youâll come with us.â You really didnât have a choice, as you didnât want to be killed by Alioth. Regardless, you didnât like this Loki variant. He appeared to view himself as presidential considering the âVote Lokiâ pen on his suit. He was arrogant. He thought he was above others. He didnât bother to ask you what your name was. Unfortunately, you would come to dislike him even more.
All of you eventually made it back to the bunker. You went down first, and everyone else followed. âWelcome to your new home, pet. Iâll explain the rules. You will only answer to me and no one else. When I want something from you, you will give it to me without question. When I give you an order, you will obey me. You are my property. I own you. If you do as I say, you will be well cared for. If you donât, you will be punished. Do you understand?â You nodded. He placed a finger underneath your chin and lifted your head so you were looking at him. âI expect an answer, pet.â His eyes showed that he loved being in control. âYes...I understand.â He was pleased with your answer. âGood girl.â He dragged you to his bedroom. It was nice and relatively clean considering the living situation.
He closed the door behind him. âI think youâll do nicely. Be a good girl and take off your clothes.â Your voice caught in your throat. âWhat?â âYou heard me. You didnât think this wouldnât be part of the arrangement, did you? Itâs been so long since Iâve had someone in my bed. You should thank me. I couldâve left you out there to die.â You knew what that meant. âPlease, Loki. I donât want to sleep with you.â âWould you prefer if I tossed you out there?â âNo.â âThen do as I say.â You took off your clothes and the assault began. It was brutal. Loki was not gentle. He wasnât considerate of your comfort or safety in any way. He did what he wanted. It was finally over you just laid there staring at the ceiling. Loki seemed satisfied, âbut you didnât care. âI think Iâll keep you.â He left the room.
You werenât sure how much time had passed, but it felt like time was infinite. Given that you were in a wasteland, there wasnât much food. You ate what you had. Loki continued to use you as he pleased, he berated the other Lokis. He was an autocrat. You didnât dare say anything. The few times you didnât do what he said, it resulted in more fear and harsh punishment. âThatâs enough for now. We need to get some rest. I have another bunker and more lesser variants to conquer.â It seemed like you had just fallen asleep when you were woken up. âGet up, pet. Weâre going after that bunker.â You followed him closely all the way to bunker. Just as you approached it, the hatch opened. A Loki who looked just like the Loki you were with was at the top of the latter. He was wearing a dirty light blue shirt with a brown tie with the sleeves rolled up and brown pants. âAh, hello. Which one of us are you?â The Loki you were with asked.
You and the rest of the Lokis climbed down inside the bunker. âAbout that deal we made, Iâve decided to make a new bargain.â âWhat? You canât go back on your word!â âCome on. What did you expect? This is my bargain. My army, my throne.â The Loki who looked like your Loki looked at you. You couldnât be too sure, but you thought he was expressing sympathy. Of course your Loki noticed him looking at you. âAh, I see youâve taken an interest in my toy. Go on, pet. Give him a show.â You felt your stomach churn. âBut--â âNow!â He practically threw you at the other Loki, but the other Loki caught you before you could fall to the ground. âDonât keep him waiting.â You gave the other Loki a pleading look. âNo. Iâm not doing this. Iâm not going to make her do something she doesnât want to do.â
His response shocked you. Was this Loki a good person? You werenât sure, but he didnât seem mean-spirited. âWhat have you been doing to her? I can see bruises. Have you been feeding her properly?â Your Loki chuckled. âI merely took what was mine. She belongs to me. I must say I never thought mortal bodies could be resilient enough. I suppose now I know why that dolt of a brother likes them so much.â He smirked, proud of his statement. âYou are disgusting. You treat her like an animal!â âI see no difference. And who are you to preach morality? You are me, after all. Youâre telling me you wouldnât take what belongs to you?â âThere was a time when I wanted a throne, but Iâm not that person anymore. Even if I was, I would never do what you did to her. I have friends to find so I can get out of here.â âWell, isnât that touching? Very well.â Your Loki snapped his fingers and pointed to the ground, signaling he wanted you next to him.
The other Loki pulled you close to him. âWhatâs your name?â âY/N.â âY/N, you donât have to go to him. You can come with me. My friends were pruned which means theyâre here too. Weâll find them, and you can get out of here. Trust me.â âPet. Get over here. Now.â Your Loki gave you a warning look, you could tell from his tone that he was losing patience. âI want to go with you, but heâll never let me go.â You whispered to the other Loki. âYouâre a person, not a possession to own, Y/N.â You decided to trust him. âThatâs it. I warned you.â Your Loki started to approach you, but the other Lokis turned on him and a fight broke out. You took your chance and followed the other Loki through the portal. True to his word, he found his friends. Mobius and Sylvie. Mobius offered everyone a chance to go back. âY/N will go with you, Mobius. We still have work to do, but weâll see both of you soon.â You hugged Loki and thanked him before going through the portal with Mobius.
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three lessons - mat barzal
a/n: new series idea I just had, spoiler there is filth and the next parts will be as well also im not the best at writing smut so youâll have to bear with me here. anyway! let me know what you think! comments/thoughts are always appreciated! also, I know it briefly mentions being the younger sister of a teammate, but I know nothing about the isles so its literally just for plot purposes donât expect much from that and this isnât proofread sorry
word count: 4.2k
summary: youâre tired of being a virgin, so you hit up Mat to help you with your problem and strike a deal
warnings (18+): loss of virginity, smut
PART TWO
-
This was by far the worst idea youâve ever had.
In your twenty-one years of life, youâve never had a worse idea. Your initial plan was crazy in and of itself, but adding Mat to the mix? Itâs like you were asking to get your ass kicked.
The original thought came to you a year ago when you were sitting on the couch of your friendâs apartment, four glasses of wine into the night. She was complaining about her latest hookup, raging over the fact that he didnât know where the clit was.
This is how it usually went between you two.
She was the one who got all the guys, the one who could pick up anyone from the bar and spend the night in a strangerâs bed without a second thought. You, however, were the wingwoman, the person who was left behind when your friend eventually decided to leave with a man.
It didnât bother you that much. Itâs not like you felt like you needed a boyfriend, you were secure in almost all aspects of your life, but the nagging thought in the back of your mind kept saying that you needed to get fucked. And soon.
Maybe it was the alcohol coursing through your bloodstream or the fact that you hadnât masturbated in nearly two weeks, but you rolled your eyes at your friend before you finally snapped.
âAt least youâve had someone to fuck the past few months! Be grateful youâre not me and still a virgin at twenty!â You shouted, fed up with hearing stories about how your friendâs sex life was so terrible. At least she had a sex life to begin with.
âOh my god. Iâm so sorry,â you apologized quickly, bringing your hand to cover your mouth in shock, âI didnât mean that. Iâm sorry, itâs just⊠itâs hard listening to you talk about this when I canât contribute to the conversation.â
âNo, youâre right. Iâm sorry for always talking about it,â your friend said, eyes softening when she heard how regretful you sounded, âHow about we change the subject?â
She didnât wait for your response before launching into a monologue about how classes were going and her upcoming finals. You tried listening to her, but your mind was still stuck on the previous topic. Of course it was unfortunate that you happened to be twenty and with no sexual experience, but it didnât bother you before like it was bothering you right now.
Ideas began racing through your head of how you could rectify this, and thatâs when the seed was planted.
Now, almost a year later, your carefully thought out plan was almost complete; though, âcarefullyâ could be more loosely translated to âreckless.â
You paced outside of Matâs door, walking back and forth as you fiddled with your hands, working up the courage to knock. This was such a bad idea. You brought your hand up to the door, pausing before your fist made contact before bringing it back down and resuming your pacing.
After another five minutes of deep contemplation, you made your decision. You knocked on the door before you could second guess yourself, now bringing your hands to tug at the strands of your hair.
The few seconds it took for Mat to answer the door felt like a lifetime, and when he opened the door, you were met with a confused look.
âY/N? What are you doing here?â He asked, peeking his head out of the door to glance down the hallway.
âHi, I know you werenât expecting me and you have to leave for practice soon, but I needed to talk to you about something,â you explained quickly.
Matâs brows stayed furrowed in confusion, but he opened the door further to let you inside.
âFirstly, I just wanted to say that Anders doesnât know Iâm here, and Iâd really appreciate it if you never mentioned it to him,â you said as he closed the door behind you.
Mat ushered you into his living room, gesturing for you to take a seat on the couch as he crossed his arms and waited for you to continue.
âThis is going to sound absolutely crazy and youâre probably going to reject me but just hear me out,â you said, taking a deep sigh. He was totally going to shut you down, but there was no turning back now.
âI wanted to ask you if youâd have sex with me. Youâd be doing me a favor as my friend. Iâm kind of⊠a virgin⊠and I really donât want to be anymore,â you took a breath to watch his reaction which was unreadable, âYouâre probably thinking itâs a terrible idea, being that Iâm Andersâs sister and everything, but I promise I wonât say anything to him. I just want to get a little experience under my belt⊠itâs kind of embarrassing. Anyway, I just wanted to ask if youâd give me a few lessons or something.â
You raised your eyes to meet Matâs as you finished your rant, worrying about what he was going to say. A long silence fell between you two as he processed what you said.
âUh⊠I donât really know what to say,â he started awkwardly, bringing his hand to rub at the back of his neck, âIâm honored, I guess? That you asked me to help, but Iâm just a little confused since we donât really know each other.â
Okay, you could give him that. It was true that you werenât the closest of friends, but youâd met on a handful occasions. Itâs not like you were complete strangers, but other than knowing what you were studying in school and that you were Andersâs much younger sister, he didnât know much about you.
âThatâs fair,â you said, âI asked you because, well, youâre obviously hot which Iâm sure you know. Also, not knowing each other is what makes this perfect. Iâm not attached to you in any way and vice versa. Honestly? Youâre one of the few guys in town that I feel comfortable around, so it was either ask you or find a random Tinder hookup and have to do this speech all over again but ten times as awkward.â
Mat didnât like the last part of that explanation: the whole ârandom Tinder hookup to take your virginityâ part. He may not have known you that well, but he knew you were a nice girl and deserved to be more than just a notch on the bedpost of someone who didnât care about you.
âI know youâre probably thinking Iâm insane, and I get it. I felt a little insane when I thought about this too. But I really feel like youâre the best option. I understand if you think itâs too weird, though,â you said when he hadnât replied. Your eyes watched him as he sat still as a rock across from you.
âI⊠I have to leave for practice soon,â was the only thing he responded with.
You felt your heart drop at his statement. Of course he was going to say no, you were an idiot for even trying.
âYeah, totally, Iâll get going,â you said quickly, gathering your stuff and making your way to the entrance.
When you reached the door, you turned back one last time to see him still in the same position.
âCan you not tell Anders, please? I know this was a crazy, stupid idea but⊠just donât tell him, okay? He doesnât need to know about my sex⊠well, lack of sex life,â you added before shutting the door behind you.
-
Mat had lost his mind.
Truly and honestly, he had lost his mind if he was even considering your proposition. Which he was. He was really considering your proposition, and he wanted to punch himself for it.
He couldnât possibly agree to this, could he? You were the captainâs younger sister. Sure, you two werenât the closest of siblings, but the code still applied. And the code clearly said he was not allowed to fraternize with relatives of his teammates in any way. He hadnât broken this rule yet, and he couldnât believe he was even thinking about breaking it now.
Inside his head, he weighed the pros and the cons of sleeping with you. Well, teaching you would be a better phrase. If Mat was being honest, he had blacked out after the terms âvirginâ and âhave sex with meâ fell from your lips. He watched you from his spot on the couch, his eyes following your mouth but not processing the words you were saying. Truthfully, he ran over the conversation a million times in his head and he wasnât sure he was actually processing them now.
You wanted him to take your virginity. You wanted him to give you experience. You called them lessons.
You were, quite literally, asking him to be your sex tutor.
When you left the apartment, he did what he did best. He compartmentalized. Instead of thinking about the awkward conversation he just had with you, he pushed all thoughts of you from his mind and went to practice. For a whole three hours he focused on hockey. He even had the courage to look at his captain despite the weird interaction heâd just had with his sister.
But then practice was over, and Mat was left with nothing to do but think about what you said. Thinking turned into contemplating, and contemplating eventually turned into pulling up your Instagram page.
Mat typed and retyped the message a million times, deleting it before he could accidentally pressed send. He went back and forth between wanting to say yes and throwing his phone as far away from him so he wouldnât be tempted.
What could be the worst thing that happened? He thought.
A million bad things could happen. He knew this deep in his heart that it was, for all intents and purposes, the worst idea ever to teach his captainâs sister how to have sex, but his head and desire to get laid had other plans.
So, he picked up his phone one last time and composed the same message heâd written a hundred times.
to @yourusername: does your offer still stand? text me 212-203-3849
-
For the second time in a week, you were pacing outside of Matâs apartment. Youâd received his message almost six days ago, and now here you were.
Your chest nearly collapsed with relief when youâd seen he wanted to take you up on your offer. And then your stomach filled with butterflies, nerves wracking your body as you now had an official plan to lose your virginity.
You eagerly liked the message, dialing his number in your phone so you could hash out the details over text. He promised you two would go over some ground rules in person, saying it felt too weird to have a written contract or something over text. You agreed to his plans and set a date to go over to his apartment that following weekend.
Feeling more courageous than you did a week ago, you knocked on the door with confidence this time. If you were going to lose your virginity tonight, you werenât going to look like a frightened kitten when you did.
Mat greeted you with a warm smile this time, his eyes lighting up when he saw you. Same as last time, he ushered you into his apartment and directed you towards his couch.
âDo you want anything to drink? I was about to open a bottle of wine,â Mat asked, already moving to the kitchen.
âYeah, wine would be great. Thanks,â you replied, taking a seat on the edge of the couch.
Mat tinkered around in the kitchen for a couple minutes before he joined you, handing you a glass of red. You took a long sip as he settled down, hoping the wine would work fast to calm your nerves.
âSo, what did you want to discuss first?â He asked after a moment.
âWell, we should probably have some ground rules. I was thinking that since youâre the expert and all, you should decide how these lessons go. Oh, and I think that we should keep this to a three-time thing. Anything more than that will probably get more complicated,â you answered with ease. Not to say you had spent the past week thinking about what you were going to say, but you definitely did.
Mat nodded in agreement at your suggestions before adding his own.
âYeah, that sounds good. Also, we canât tell anyone about this because, you know, your brother and the team and all,â he said. You hummed in response, that much was a given. No one could know about this.
âSo, where do we start? Should I take off my clothes or?â You asked.
âNo,â he said with a chuckle, âWeâre going to watch a movie.â
âThatâs it?â
âThatâs it. For now at least.â
You hadnât known what you were expecting, but it was not a cuddle session on his couch. You imagined that maybe he wouldâve just ripped your clothes off the minute you walked in to get down to business, but he was being way more casual than you were feeling. Which was probably a good thing because your heart was beating a thousand beats a minute, so at least one of you had this situation under control.
Mat had told you to dress comfortably as he didnât plan on leaving the apartment, and he was dressed in a similar fashion as you: gray sweatpants with a dark blue t-shirt. You had thrown on a pair of leggings and a shirt from your college before leaving, making sure to wear at least a nice bralette and pair of panties underneath.
He drank down the rest of his wine before adjusting himself on the couch, moving into a position where he was laying down. Grabbing the blanket folded on the back cushion, he spread it out over his body before patting the spot in front of him. Normally, you wouldâve been intimidated by a bold move like this, but the wide smile on his face indicated that he was perfectly comfortable right now, and his ease surrounded you in waves.
Slamming back the rest of your wine, you lay down in front of him, tucking your body against his while his arms pulled your chest closer.
âAnything specific you want to watch?â He asked, using his free hand to grab the remote. You muttered a quiet âno,â allowing him to go ahead and choose. Mat scrolled through the Netflix options before settling on a new action movie.
âSo, how much experience do you have exactly?â Mat asked once the introduction credits had finished. It was a good thing he wasnât looking at you because your face heated up in embarrassment.
âIâve only ever got as far as making out,â you muttered.
âNo oneâs ever touched you then?â He prodded.
âNo,â you replied, your cheeks on fire. You couldnât see him, but Mat nodded in response against the back of your head, letting out a quiet âokay.â
It wasnât the first time Mat had been with a virgin, but that hadnât been since high school and when he also wasnât that experienced himself. Mat decided to let the movie play for a little bit longer before making his first move.
That time came when there was a particularly slow scene on. Slowly, he lifted up the hem of your t-shirt and slid his hand underneath, tracing small circles on the skin of your stomach. You clenched your thighs together as a warm feeling started to spread throughout your body.
It was happening.
Mat kept his hands there for a few minutes, inching up so slowly you almost couldnât tell heâd moved at all. When the initial shock of his touch settled, you tried to refocus your attention to the movie.
Another ten minutes passed before Mat made his next move. Almost imperceptibly, he used his elbow to push his torso up before he brushed the hair covering your neck to the side. You felt his fingertips brush your ear, a shiver running up your spine. He brought his lips to your neck a split second later, placing a soft kiss against it.
Your eyes briefly shut for a second, reveling in the fact that Matâs lips were on your neck. He kissed around your jaw a couple times before the hand on his stomach was shifting you to rest on your back. Your body followed his lead and your eyes met his hazel ones before he was leaning in to kiss your lips.
A heat unfurled in your body the second your lips connected and you eagerly moved yours against his. One of Matâs hands had moved to the back of your neck to tilt your head at a better angle, the other hand moving further up under your shirt to rest just below your bra clasp. Your body involuntarily arched up into his hands as his tongue slipped out to part your lips. You opened your mouth and his tongue entered immediately, tangling with yours. You and Mat lay on the couch for a good while, making out heavily before you eventually had to break it for air.
âAt least you donât have to worry about kissing. Youâre a natural,â Mat commended with an airy chuckle, and you couldnât help but laugh at his compliment.
Matâs smile brightened at your laugh before he leaned back in, the heat building in your body at double speed. You knew you were attracted to him, but you didnât think he would be able to wind you up this fast. Or maybe it was just because youâve never had a man touch you like this before.
Breaking the kiss, Mat began to trail more kisses down your body, pausing near your collarbone when he heard a particular breathy gasp leave your mouth. Mat continued his path over your shirt until he reached your belly button.
âCan I take this off?â He asked, looking up at you.
âYou can take mine off if you take yours off,â you replied with a seductive smirk. Mat pulled back from your body, matching your smirk with one of his own as he tore off his shirt. Less than a second later, he was tugging at the hem of yours, urging you to sit up so he could take it off.
Matâs hands were back on your body right after he tossed your shirt on the floor. This time, he retraced his path down your torso with his mouth and tongue, leaving no patch of skin untouched. His fingers danced around the edge of your leggings, teasing you until you were lifting up your hips into his face.
âPlease take them off, Mat,â you said through gasps, wanting nothing more than to be rid of your clothing. He chuckled lightly against your waistband, his nose tickling your abdomen before he began shimmying off your leggings.
Tilting your hips up, you helped him slide the pants down your legs along with your underwear. Though your cheeks flamed up at the thought of being exposed before Mat, you felt oddly calm (well, as calm as you can be given the circumstances) with him.
âHoly shit, baby. Youâre soaked,â Mat noted with a deep groan. He shuffled his body further down the couch into a comfortable position, lifting one leg to hook over his shoulder.
You breathed in shaky breaths as Mat placed gentle kisses on your thighs, working upwards slowly until he reached your core. And when he used his tongue to lick a strip across your pussy, your back arched into the air as you let out a loud moan.
âYou gotta stay still, Y/N,â Mat chuckled darkly, wrapping one hand to steady your middle.
âSorry, never done this before,â you replied in gasps.
Now immobilized, Mat resumed his place between your legs, repeating the same series of licks before he closed his lips around your clit. He flicked his tongue across the sensitive area. God, you would have done this a long time ago if you knew it would feel this good. You werenât sure if it was too early to feel the heat inside you build up this quickly or if Mat was just too good at this. You hoped it was the latter.
His tongue lapped at your folds, and your hands flew down to grasp his hair in need. You didnât think you could moan any louder, but then he brought his thumb to your clit to rub in tight circles as his tongue teased your entrance.
âHoly fuck,â you whined out, canting your hips up as much as you could. You could feel his smirk against your pussy at your exclamation, bringing his hand down to slowly enter a finger into you.
You let out a surprised gasp as you felt the first finger penetrate you. Mat kept his attention on your clit, lips sucking harshly at it. You let yourself get lost in the pleasure, focusing on how good he was making you feel.
After a few thrusts of one finger, giving you plenty of time to adjust, he added a second, feeling your walls tighten around them. He moved both fingers in and out of you, alternating the pressure between your entrance and clit. Just when he hit the right spot inside you, your hand tugged on his hair tightly, and he took the hint to curl his fingers against that spot.
âIâm so close, Mat,â you moaned, tossing your head back into the pillow.
âWhat do you need, baby?â He asked, pulling back for a quick breath. You glanced down to meet his gaze, taking in the way his chin glistened from your pussy. The view made you moan lowly, and his eyes darkened at the sound.
âYour tongue, please,â you begged quietly.
Mat heard the words leave your mouth and nestled his face back between your legs, tongue sliding up your slit in response. In rhythm with stroking your g-spot, he sucked at your clit, and it was mere seconds before your body coiled tightly inside. He kept the same pace and before long, you felt yourself crest the peak and then fall.
Mat removed his fingers slowly from your entrance, his tongue licking softly at your folds until he felt your breathing return to normal. It took you a few seconds to regain your sense of self, stars still whirling in the corners of your vision. When you finally felt yourself grounded on Earth again, you opened your eyes to see a self-satisfied smirk on Matâs face.
âYouâre so hot when you come,â he said when you met his gaze, and had you not been riding high on cloud nine when he said this, you might have blushed in embarrassment. But you werenât embarrassed right now. The only thing you felt was giddy. Giddy because you were one step closer to your end goal.
And while you were blissed out, you dropped your gaze to notice the extremely visible bulge tenting in his sweatpants. Focused on a new task, you sat up quickly before leaning over Matâs body so you could return the favor. Your lips crashed against his in a frenzy, your hands clumsily reaching down to grasp his length. However, you only got to feel it for a second before Matâs hand was tugging it away.
âNot tonight, babe. Tonight was about you,â Mat said with a strained voice, breaking the kiss to look at you.
âWhat do you mean? Weâre not having sex tonight?â You asked in confusion, your head still a little hazy from the orgasm.
âNo, weâre not,â he laughed, noticing the wantonness in your voice, âYou said Iâm in charge, right? This was already a lot for one night, so weâll put off the sex until next time.â
You nodded your head, though you werenât really understanding. It made sense. Tonight was a very big step for you, and he didnât want to give you too much at once. But despite that, your pussy was begging for a repeat performance and you were so far gone you were willing to do just about anything Mat would say.
âWhat about you, though?â You asked, glancing down to the noticeable tent.
âIâll be fine, I promise. We still have two more lessons. Thereâs plenty of time for that later,â he replied, though the bulge between you seemed to say otherwise.
âPromise youâre okay?â You insisted.
âI swear, Y/N,â he said with a chuckle.
A comfortable silence fell between you after that, and you couldnât help the wide smile that spread across your face. Your eyes sparkled with renewed purpose, and you felt satisfied for the first time in a long time. A smile of Matâs own slowly appeared on his face as he watched you light up before him. Before you could stop yourself, you threw yourself into him, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck.
âThank you, Mat. Thank you, thank you, thank you,â You said happily, punctuating each âthank youâ with a loud smacking kiss on his cheek.
When you pulled back to give him that award-winning smile again, Mat had one thought.
He was totally fucked.
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Andiamo a conoscere la famiglia
(Letâs meet the family)Â
Pairing: Chris Evans/ Fisrt Person Reader
Wordcount: 4.7kÂ
Warnings: smut, NSFW, read under caution
Request: âHello!! If youâre still taking requests I was wondering if you could write a one shot where the Chris evans and age gap reader go on vacation with her family for the first time and itâs just supa sweet maybe even a little smutty? Thanks a tonâ by the lovely and patient @bellamy-morley-blakeâÂ
A/N: This is my first CEvans OS and I donât know what lead me to write the tittle in Italian, but oh well. Hope you enjoy it! Donât forget to reblog and comment if you like it!Â
CEvans taglist: @mrsnegan25â
When I agreed to be Chris Evansâ girlfriend, the thought of him meeting my family never really crossed my mind, considering that I never thought our relationship would go further than a couple of dates.
And Iâve never been more thankful for being wrong. Weâve been together for half a year now, and things have been wonderful. Heâs the most passionate guy Iâve ever met, about his job, his hobbies, his family and now, me.
We met in Disneyworld, at Magic Kingdom to be more precise, and to say sparks flew instantly would be an understatement. I was traveling with my family and him with his, and we met on the line for one of the rides. He asked for my name and then we started talking, completely forgetting about our relatives and the line ahead and behind us. After that, we went to a couple of dates, inside and out the parks at Disney, and as they say, the rest is history.
Since the moment our first date started, I knew that Chris was the type that my parents would like for me, even though our age gap was kind of obvious. But that didnât matter so much, specially to us.
The idea of spending the holidays with my parents was mine, and I was nervous about the outcome of it and how Chris would react. I happened to be wrong, again. My boyfriend was thrilled about the idea and was excited because heâd wanted to meet my relatives for a while. So, we decided to surprise them with a trip to the Bahamas. The idea was to departure, each of us, from the locations we were in (Chris and I from Boston, to L.A., and then to the Island; and my parents from my hometown), and we would all meet and check in at the hotel.
I close the zip of my bag and let out a big huff, because Iâm finally done packing my clothes and necessaire with my âlady stuffâ as Chris calls it. After days and days of procrastinating, the day of our flight finally arrived and my luggage wasnât even half way made. So, I had to go full speed and get it all together a couple of hours before leaving.
Chris texts me, saying that he and his brother are on their way to pick me up to go to the airport. I reply back with a âOk! Canât wait!!!â and then finish packing the last necessities.
After some minutes, I donât know exactly how many, my phone starts ringing and when I go to pick up, I see that itâs Chris. Who else, duh?
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Weâre here, baby! Do you need help with your bags?
 -         Uhm⊠I think I got it. But come up here to give me some kisses, Iâve missed you. â I pout and I hear him laugh.
 -         Okay, babe. Iâm on my way up. â he hangs up and I keep packing stuff on my carry-on baggage: phone charger, earphones, passport, airplane tickets, etc.
 I hear a soft knock on the door, then it gets opened and Chris comes in with his childish smirk. I smile back at him and walk fast to his waiting open arms. When I reach him, I jump on him, wrapping my legs around his slim waist and my arms around his neck, and he holds me tight against him, putting one of his hands on my back and the other under my butt.
I grab his face with both my hands and bring him close to me, to seal our lips in a deep kiss. The last time we saw each other was ten days ago, and I can see that he missed me as much as I did him. When we break apart, he smiles at me and I peck his nose, then his cheekbones and finally go back to peck his pink and full lips. Gosh, how Iâve missed him.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Iâm afraid that, if you keep this up, we wonât make it to the airport. â he says between pecks and I nod my head, but donât let go of him.
He then puts me down, seeing that I have no intention of doing so, and grabs my face to give me one last full, deep kiss. We separate and he goes to grab my big bag, silently asking with a nod of his head if thereâs anything else I need him to carry, to which I shake my head no and he nods again. I go grab my backpack and then we both take off, me closing and locking the door once weâre outside. We walk hand in hand down through the building I live in, till we reach the lift. Once inside it, we make small talk about his latest projects and my online classes. He talks a bit about A Starting Point, how the interviews have gone and how it has impacted to young population (me included, and Iâm not even from the U.S). I feel so proud of him, heâs achieved a lot, after working so hard for it.
When we reach the first floor, the metal doors open and we walk to the reception of the building, where Albert (the doorman by the entrance) greets us and opens the door for us. When we step outside, I thank the kind man and we both walk to Chrisâ car, where his brother Scott is waiting for us. My boyfriend opens the trunk to get my suitcase inside, and I open the back door to get into the car.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Hi sweets, how are you? â greets me Scott once Iâm seated, with a big smile on his handsome face.
 -         Hello, handsome. Iâm pretty well, how about you? â I smile back at him and lean forward to kiss his cheek.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Awesome. Itâs been an amazing couple of weeks lately.
 -         Thatâs great, hon! Tell me more about it.
I pay high attention to him while Chris climbs on the passenger seat, and Scott tells me all about this new guy (Steve) heâs been seeing lately. I love how happy he is, he definitely deserves it.Â
On our way to the airport, we share what each of us has been up to in the time we didnât see one another, while Chris controls the music with his phone that is connected to the stereo via Bluetooth. âMore than wordsâ by Extreme sounds through the speakers and my boyfriend looks at me through the side mirror and smiles lightly at me, letting me know with that gesture that this song is dedicated to me, to us.
The thing is, we havenât told each other the âLâ word yet and the worst part is that I donât even know why. We love each other, we show the other that we feel that way, but expressing those words out loud has proven to be a difficult task.Â
I smile back at him and lean forward to leave a peck on his shoulder, with the car seat between us. Scott keeps making small talk, and sometimes the three of us would sing whenever a classic song comes next. It takes us at least forty minutes to arrive to our destination, and when we do, we still have one more hour to do the check in and wait to board our flight. Chris and I go to the check in and dispatch area, where we hand the kind old lady our passports and tickets, and she does the procedure to send us, later, to the boarding waiting room. We say goodbye to Scott, with huge hugs and kisses from my part and a tight hug with a pat in the back from Chris, and we go to the security scanner to get ourselves checked. It only takes us around twenty minutes, and we are finally able to go to wait for our flight to be announced.
Some fans come to ask for pics with Chris, and he canât refuse them. They stare at me weirdly, making me feel anxious in a way, because Iâm not sure how to interpretate those looks. Are they mad? Are they judging me, or my relationship with Chris? We havenât gone public yet, so I donât really know what they could possibly be judging me for. So, I decide to let it go for now.
A voice in the speakers calls for the attendants of our flight to board, and thatâs when he can finally come back to me. He gives me a sympathetic smile while I collect our stuff and I just wave it off. Itâs not a big deal.Â
After almost thirteen hours of flying and waiting (five hours from Boston to L.A, then three hours waiting for our next flight, and finally four more hours to Bahamas), we make it to the hotel around six in the morning, completely tired and with zero energy to do anything but sleep. We leave our bags next to a couch the room has, and I decide to go and take a quick shower to remove the airplane smell from my body. When Iâm done, I get out of the bathroom with just a towel around my body and one holding my wet hair, and I spot Chris soundly snoring on the bed. I let out a little laugh and then proceed to get comfy in one of his shirts and one of my black thongs he loves so much. After that, I go lay down next to him until I canât keep my eyes open anymore and fall deeply asleep.
The next day, I wake up tangled between Chrisâ limbs and I let out a big yawn before circling my arms around his back, closing my eyes and kissing his naked shoulder. I feel him stir and then turning around to face me, leaving a trail of kisses from my face down to my neck and shoulders. He keeps pecking every inch of skin he can reach, until I open my eyes and smile lightly at him, and he smiles back at me, before leaning forward to leave a sweet kiss on my lips.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Good morning, pretty girl. â he mumbles against my cheek and leaves a peck there.
 -         Good morning, big guy. Howâd you sleep?
 -         Mmm⊠your incessant snoring actually kept me up for a couple of minutes, but Iâm getting used to it by now. â I reply coyly and he lets out a snort.
 -         Like a baby, considering Iâve finally got you all to myself. â he smiles again and I back at him. â How about you?
 -         You arenât what they call a light sleeper either, my love. Have had your fair share of snores as well.
 -         And Iâm sure you havenât been able to sleep properly for it, specially tonight.Â
We spend a couple of minutes there, laying in bed, sharing kisses and silent touches, showing to the other that we lounged for this moment, after being apart for so long. The clock marks ten past eleven in the morning, and we decide to get up and unpack our bags. Chris goes for a shower first, and then joins me to do the task in hand.
After some brunch, we head out of the room after I receive a text from my mom saying that they were settled in the hotel (same as ours) and that we should meet them at the lobby. Chris takes my hand, and I can feel him sweating with the tip of his fingers cold as ice, touching the skin of my own. I take our joined hands to my mouth and leave a little kiss on the back of his, letting him know that everythingâs fine, and he turns to look at me and smiles nervously but his shoulders visibly relax.
When we reach the lobby, I can see my parents waving their arms at us, and I wave back at them with a big smile on my face. Iâm so excited about this.
Chris and I walk hand in hand to them and when we are face to face, I jump to hug both my parents after months of not seeing them due to my job commitments. They hug me back, telling me how much theyâve missed me. When we break our group hug, I turn to my boyfriend and stretch my hand to him, beckoning to come closer to us. He does just that, but stays an arm length to greet them with a handshake (I suppose), except that my mom doesnât let him and pulls him in a big hug, taking Chris by surprise.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Iâm sorry, darling, but weâre huggers.
 -         Itâs ok, maâam. I am one myself, but didnât want to cross any line.
 -         Iâm starting to like you and I donât even know your name, son. â my father smiles and pats Chris on the back, instead of going for a full bear hug like my mom did.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Itâs Chris, sir. Chris Evans, a pleasure to finally meet you.
The day goes on pretty much that way. Chris and my parents engage into deep conversations about diverse topics, like politics, sports, even religion. Dad explains to him the importance of meritocracy to make a citizen evolve (according to his point of view, obviously) and Chris gives his opinion about that topic as well.
We enjoy some time in the hotel pool, my mom and I sunbathing while our men chat away in the bar, and when the sun starts to go down a bit we decide to go and sightsee around the island. First, each of us go to our respective rooms, to shower the chlorine off our bodies and get into comfortable clothes.
Once thatâs done, we meet again at the lobby, where my parents arrived first (because my man and I took some extra time to do⊠some extra activities), and were talking with the receptionist, asking him where we can visit. He gives us some maps that show the nearest touristic area, somewhere we could reach walking, and we all thank him before leaving.
We go to a small village, where local markets are still open to the public, and we all go our ways to see and buy stuff if we feel like it. Chris and I walk with our fingers intertwined, me resting my cheek on his strong bicep and leaving little pecks every now and then. I feel the love I have for him radiating through my veins, after the success of this afternoon, all I want to do is be with him, show him how much I thank and love him for today and all the effort he put to make things easier.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Look, baby â he says signaling a stand with different handicrafts on a table, with a lovely smiling old lady standing behind it.
 I look around, and Chris leaves my side for a moment to go and check out some of the rest of the stands. A quartz stone necklace catches my attention and, after asking the kind lady, I grab it between my fingers.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Each of the rocks have different meanings, you know. â the woman says and I look back at her â The green one youâre holding now represents prosperity and wellness, and they all change according to the color. The purple one goes for spirituality and meditation, the blue one for calm force and relaxation, and the list goes on and on. â she smiles sweetly at me and I back at her. â Any of them caught your eye?
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â The green one, actually. If you had two of them, it would be amazing.
 She smiles again and leans down to reach for something under the table, to come back up with another necklace just like the one Iâm holding in my hands. She puts them both inside a little paper bag and I hand her the money, then I thank her and go back to my boyfriend.
We continue our walk until the sun sets completely and we decide to grab some dinner before heading back to the hotel. After dinner, my parents decide to go to bed early because of the long flight and the hours of endless fun they had with us, calling it a night. But Chris and I opt to go to walk through the beach for some time. And thatâs what we do.
The path is silent, but nice. We walk holding hands and suddenly I remember the two pieces of artisan jewelry I have inside my little purse, which makes me stop my walk and Chris to look at me confused.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â I got something for, well, us. â I say with a smile handing the pendant to him. He looks at me with a confused but lovely smile â When you left be on that stand, I saw these necklaces and instantly fell in love. The nice lady said they have different meanings depending on the color.
 -         Well, what does the green one mean baby?
 -         Itâs a symbol of prosperity and wellness, according to her. And I knew I had to get one for each of us. â I take a deep breath. Okay, here it goes. â Today was lovely, with my parents and everything, you made it so special and joyful. Iâm so thankful for you, that I had to get you something to express that, so this is it. This is my wish for us, a commitment I decide to make to you, for this relationship to be as prosperous and strong as this solid piece. Because I love you, and all I want to do is grow this love with you next to me, supporting each other and working hard to make it work.
 I finish my little speech with a crack in my voice, tears accumulating in my eyes, but I couldnât care less, because Iâve been dying to let him know that I love him with every piece of me, every fiber of muscle, every single part of me loves him like I never loved anyone before. When I look up at him, I see the same emotions radiating from his baby blues, and he wastes no time to grab my face between his soft hands and kisses me with all the adoration he has for me, that I know he has.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â God, I canât believe youâve made me tear up like this. â he says when we break the kiss and we both chuckle â Youâre the most beautiful person Iâve ever met, inside and out. Your words just made me fall in love even more deeply with you, and now I feel like an idiot for not expressing my feelings well enough. - He laughs in embarrassment â But the thing is, I love you with all of me, with every piece of mind and soul, in every way thereâs possible, and I commit to you as well to make this love grow even more, and work for it through thick and thin. Youâre my world, nugget.
Now Iâm fully- ass crying. I hug him tightly, circling my arms around his strong shoulders, and he puts his around my back, lifting me and hiding his face in the space between my neck and shoulder. Chris leaves little pecks on the skin there, and finally moves his mouth to mine, sealing our love deal with a searing kiss. A kiss that holds every emotion we have and share, emotions weâve been suppressing all this time. No more, though.
When we break apart, he asks me to put the pendant around his neck and he does the same with me, and with happy smiles on our faces we walk back to the hotel.
 We reach our roon and I can feel the change on the air. Thereâs tension, and Chris looks at me with a promise of a night full of showing me that he meant every word he said. I walk backwards, with Chris walking towards me, guiding me to the bed and making me fall on it when I reach it with the back of my knees. He crawls above me, placing both his hands on each side of my head, looking directly in my eyes. I smile at him, bringing one of my arms up to caress his bearded jaw, and he leans into my touch, leaving a little kiss on my hand right after.
Chris starts caressing my legs, from my ankles up to my thighs, leaving a path of goosebumps on my skin as he lifts my long skirt and rolls it up on my hips, leaving my covered crotch exposed to his starved sight. I let out a sigh when he blows a thin rush of air from his mouth, hitting my pussy directly, making me squirm because the contrast between the heat of my wet womanhood and his cold breath is evident and rushes a wave of pleasure through my body. He grabs both my legs with his big hands, opening me wide and exposing me even more to him, then goes and presses his nose right on my mound, inhaling deeply and closing his eyes while doing so.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â You smell divine, doll. â he whispers and pecks my, still, covered mound.
 I let out an almost soundless whimper at that statement. His bed vocabulary is so vulgar, yet he makes it sound so erotic and sexy. He hooks his thumb and index finger around the waistband of my underwear and pulls it off, taking it to his nose and giving a little sniff that makes me close my eyes out of shyness. He can be so dirty, but oh so hot at the same time.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Open those beautiful eyes, pretty girl. I want you to look at me directly while I have this tasty dessert.
 I open my eyes, moving my body to be laying on my elbows and have a better angle to look at him, and he finally sweeps his tongue along my slit, teasing my clit with the tip once he reaches it. I look down at him, biting my lower lip and he goes back to the long strokes. Letting out a moan of protest at how slow heâs going, I grip the back of his head with one hand to make him go a little faster, deeper, harder; I donât know, anything. Or at least I try.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Patience, my sweets. Marvelous things come to those who wait. â he says and licks up and down my opening a couple of times before pulling away
 Chris removes his polo shirt, exposing his tight chest muscles covered on all those sexy tattoos he has, and I find my mouth watering at the sight of his hot self. Then, he undoes his pants and pulls them down, along with his briefs, before coming back to be on top of me again.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â I thought you wanted to taste me? â I pout and he smiles widely at me.
 -         I will, my lovely. Just wanted to get comfortable, donât wanna mess up my pants with jizz, now do yaâ? â his Boston accent comes out and I moan closing my eyes.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â No, sir. We donât want that â I answer in a small voice, biting my lip once again and batting my eyelashes at him because I know it drives him wild.
 He lets out a guttural groan at that and finally holds my legs, puts them on his shoulders to have better access, and dives in to eat from my wetness, like starved man. I yelp in surprise when I feel his mouth making out with my lower lips, adding his tongue to the mix, driving me completely crazy, and he wastes no time to flick my clit with the flexible muscle inside his mouth, then sucks it between his lips, making me mewl because heâs just so good.
 -         I swear you have the sweetest pussy Iâve ever tried, baby. So juicy, I could spend a lifetime eating you.
 Chris keeps his wonderful mouthy work, until he makes me cum the first time, adding his fingers to the process. Itâs always like this: he makes sure Iâm absolutely ready to take all of him, all of what he has to offer me, making me cum at least twice with his mouth only. I know Iâm in for a really long night (but no one hears me complaining about it, oh no.).
The sensitivity in my core is too much, but heâs having none of it. He keeps lapping around my opening, then goes up and creates patterns with his tongue around my nub, drawing eights and different shapes to stimulate it. I grab a hold of the back of his head, making him immediately stop his movements and leave his tongue out, and I start grinding my wetness up and down his mouth, marking the rhythm and speed to my liking. Iâm seconds away from coming, and he knows it because this is what I usually do when the pleasure his mouth gives me overwhelms my senses.
After a marvelous second orgasm, he climbs on top of me again, caressing my legs and pecking every inch of skin he reaches as he goes to my kiss my mouth. He places himself on his elbows, placing them on each side of my head, and with one delicate thrust he goes all in, getting a low and long moan from me and making me cling to him with all the sentiment and passion I feel for him.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Fuck, baby. Youâre so goddamn tight, still canât believe this little cunt takes all of me in.
He lets out a low groan after that, being so into dirty talk, he canât keep himself from saying the nastiest things Iâve ever heard right in my ear, which adds more lust to the situation.
Chrisâ thrusts are slow but hard, taking his time to let me feel all of him inside me, making me moan and arch my back to him. He moves his arms to hold me close and still, taking his hands down to grab my ass, all while heâs still pounding into me. I grab myself with a firm grip on his shoulders, kissing him passionately as he becomes more agitated and uncoordinated, meaning heâs close.
One of his hands travel to my mound, and it doesnât take him long to find my sensitive bundle of nerves and he starts rubbing it in swift but decided circles to bring me close to my third climax.
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Câmon, baby. Cum for me, I can feel your tight pussy clenching around me, Iâm right there with you, letâs cum together.
 The intensity of his words, the flicks on my clit and the powerful thrusts of his pelvis inside my channel, are enough to bring me to the ectasis that has been boiling inside of my lower belly, making me moan and groan out his name. The sudden tightness around his cock are what makes him go still and let a growl out of his pink and bruised mouth, releasing all of him inside my womb.
Riding me through my orgasm and his, Chris slows the pace of his thrusts, until he pulls put completely and lays all his weight on top of me, not that I mind in the slightest. I kiss his temple a couple of times, while holding him close to me, and I feel him kissing my shoulders and neck. Once our breaths are settled and calm, he rolls over to his side of the bed, bringing me with him to lay y head on his chest and interwind our lower joints.Â
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Thank you for today, love. It was amazing â I whisper against his pec and kiss him there.
 -         I should be thanking you, baby. Your gift got me even softer and weaker for you, and I thought that wasnât even possible â he chuckles and I with him. Â
-Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Itâs just something for you to remember me when youâre away working.Â
 -         I always carry you with me, my sweet girl. And I always will- he whispers and then closes his eyes â I love you so much, honey.
 -         I love you too, big guy â I close my eyes and let sleep wash over me.
 We fall asleep like this, together, holding each other in a mix of sweat, body fluids and a promise of always loving each other. I wouldnât have it any other way.
#christopher robert evans#chris evans smut#chris evans imagine#chris evans fanfiction#chris evans one shot#chris evans
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from eden | myg + jhs
you've been in the dark a long time, overworked and exhausted. the only bright point is your gatekeeper, hoseok, your closest friend and the man you love but can't have. you've accepted that loneliness is inevitable for you. when a voice calls to you, though, and moves you so deeply that you rip open the earth to help them, you meet a mint-haired boy that changes everything you thought you knew about your prison. | monsters and gods pt 1 (masterlist)
pairing | yoongi x reader x hoseok
genre/warnings | greek god au, hades!reader, thanatos!hoseok, persephone!yoongi, fluff, angst, smut, mild depictions of violence, mentions of blood (well, blood equivalent, bc gods), pining, depictions of abusive parenting, v v brief panic attack (seriously, I donât go into a ton of detail, but itâs enough, pls donât read this if that triggers you at all), love triangle (kind of), polyamory, , mutual masturbation, oral (female receiving), face-sitting, fingering, dick-riding, double penetration, unprotected sex (gods can't get sti's but u can! Wrap it b4 u tap it!), creampie, everyone hates Zeus but what's new, demeter sucks and is the literal worst
word count | 15.6k |Â cross posted to ao3Â monsters and gods masterlis
a/n | hello! iâve renamed this fic at least ten times, but itâs here!! the first part of monsters and gods!!! i keep seeing hades!yoongi (who i LOVE, donât get me wrong, seriously you should check out @/seokoloqyâs hades yoongi fics because theyâre PHENOM) and while I love hades yoongs, I also keep seeing him in flower crowns and being soft and sweet and, as we know by now, I am ultimately a slut for soft bangtan. so this happened. and then i thought âwow this mc is dark af i need some contrast hereâ and thatâs how thanatos hobi happened, also i couldnât stop thinking of his Judgement Face, which is the hottest thing Iâve ever seen, and how fast he switches between that and his smile, plus.....sope, I mean. câmon. sope. and then it all kinda spiraled into a whole series of fics, only one other of which is even started tho its close to being finished whoops lmao so yeah!!!! pls tell me what u think, iâm not used to writing angst at all, so it may not be suuuuuuper prevalent in this, but i tried!!! also i really recommend listening to hozier while you read it bc i had his first album on repeat while writing it and from eden fits this pretty well imo!!!
It's dark when you open your eyes. You've spent so long down here, you're used to it, but the shadows always seem to make the air colder than it should be. Though you suppose the land of the dead isn't supposed to be warm.
You stretch and wince at the crick in your spine. Another night sitting at your desk, greek fire burning through the hours so that you can scratch away at the papers in front of you. Your siblings always enjoy doing whatever they want, using mortals and throwing them away however they please, cleaning up after each other whenever they can spare the time.
No one ever seems to think about you, nor do they remember the chaos up top only worsens your constant migraines.
No, instead they start their wars and slaughter their enemies and are absolutely oblivious about the fact that the Meadow is at 80% capacity as it is, with more souls arriving each day. Thanatos did well at his job, as did Charon, and you were always sure to be thankful to them, but you wish, not for the first time, that there was someone - anyone - to help with your work.
Your brothers have the naiads, the winds, and the lesser gods to help them with their oceans and skies. Gods of vengeance and retribution help with war, while the fertility goddesses and the muses aid the lovelorn.
And yet here you are, still alone after all these years. Millenia, you've been stuck down here, forced to live out your days in the cold darkness and manage the dead mortals. You've always been introverted, even before you drew lots with your siblings, but never like this. You've tried to leave, of course; at first making short visits to Olympus or the mortal realm, just to speak to another living soul again, someone else who understands what it's like to be trapped in your own life. It seems like every time you came back, though, the underworld had gotten smaller and smaller, nearly suffocating you in an attempt to keep its claws in your skin. And then, of course, came the curse.
You haven't felt the sun on your skin in nearly a thousand years, and while you've always been one for the shade, you miss it. You miss the smell of the flowers in the temples, you miss the sound of the river as it babbles past, you want to feel the warm summer breeze ruffle your hair as you stand in the middle of a marketplace. You're tired of the Fields, you're bored of walking the streets of Elysium with the weight of their stares at your back, sick of standing at the steps to the Isles and wondering if it is, truly, euphoric and if any mortal would ever find out. You don't wear your sandals around the palace anymore; you don't want to hear the footsteps echo. It's just a reminder that you are, truly, alone.
Even the other deities in the Underworld have stopped calling on you. The aura that surrounds you is enough to wilt most any plant, unnerve most every animal, and the gods are no exception. The only exceptions are Hecate, who makes it her personal mission to bribe you into visiting the Meadow if only for a moment, and Thanatos when he can slip away for longer than a moment to distract you from your work. They rarely succeed, but it's the thought that counts, you suppose.
You muse on this as you walk, bare feet skimming lightly over the soil of the Meadow as you make your way to the Gates. You could probably just shadow-walk, if you wanted, you do enjoy giving your Thanatos a fright, but you figure the walk would do you good. Thereâs no one to bother you as go, thankfully. The dead wander aimlessly around you. There's no acknowledgment as you pass; there's never any recognition of anything in the Meadow, the price mortals pay for being so utterly inconsequential and mundane.
You smile when you see that your friend is busy, and you give a silent command to Cerberus not to alert the man to your presence. The dog whines a little, but sits back on his haunches, shaking the ground as he does so. You're silent as you move up behind the judge.
"You wanted me to tell you my judgment and I have," Hoseok says firmly. "You could have gone straight to the Asphodel Meadow and existed in relative peace for eternity, and instead you request a hearing, and then have the gall to question my decision?" You grimace slightly; perhaps putting Hoseok in charge of judging the souls was not the best idea, but he has yet to be wrong about someone.
"Please, sir," The mortal whimpers. He's on his knees, suit crumpled and dirty where he sits. "I was only doing what I thought was best, please, surely that matters."
"You used children!" Hoseok says in shock. "As slaves! It's 2019 and you had nearly a hundred seven-year-olds sewing clothes together in a cramped warehouse with one bathroom. You seriously expect me to give you leniency because you thought that was best?"
"Their families would have starved without that money," The mortal says. He's on the verge of tears, which has always made you uncomfortable, so you stay hidden for now. "I kept them all fed and safe, didn't I? What would they have done without me? Gone to work in some factory, with dangerous machines and cruel managers, whipped every time they needed to eat?"
"You used children as nearly free labor, barely allowed them time to piss, fed them once every twelve hours, and you expect that to be okay because they couldâve had it worse," Hoseok says. Disgust drips from his voice and youâre inclined to agree with the sentiment. "I respect your opinion, but you are to be punished for your deeds fittingly." Hoseok snaps and two of the Bones come over. These two are in desert camo, one barely tall enough to be an adult judging by the skeletal build, but their grip is unforgiving as they cart the mortal off to the Fields. You donât even need to mold together a punishment for him; the warehouse you sent others whoâd done the same wasnât quite crowded enough yet.
"Well, that was fun," You call, and delight at the way Hoseok jumps nearly a foot in the air. He glares at you as he turns and you don't bother to hide the smirk on your face. "Child slavery, huh? In this day and age?"
Hoseok tsks. "I know we used to allow some crazy shit back in the old days, but you'd think that people would know better by now. Using children like that, kidsâŠâ He trails off, still fuming, and you nod.
âI know.â You pull a piece of lint off his suit with a wrinkle of your nose. âYou made the right decision if it helps.â
âI know I did,â He says with a smirk. âI always do.â You roll your eyes and turn away from him, watching the lines of souls head through the gates to their eternal blandness. It's the best way to hide the flush he brings to your cheeks. âWhat brings you out here, though? Arenât you supposed to be doing something important?â
âDonât I wish,â You mutter. âAll Iâve got to do is figure out how to expand the realm again without Zeusâ approval.â
âWait, he didnât approve the expansion?â You shake your head and step closer to where Cerberus is laying, all three heads focused entirely on you as you rub his middle nose. âWhere does he think weâre going to put all of the souls, up your ass?â
âClearly,â You spit.
âI know itâs not exactly great down here and that they would all rather be thrown into the Pit than visit, but they need to sometimes. If only to see what itâs like. I mean, honestly, what do they expect us to do, just toss everyone in the Meadow and call it a day until there are so many that theyâre tripping into Elysium? What the f-â
âThanatos,â You say quietly, and Hoseok stops. Itâs not often that you call him by his title rather than his name, preferring the familiarity of his friendship over the detachment of your positions. âEven here, the gods have ears. You know better than to criticize them like that.â
He huffs but nods his head. You press a kiss to Cerbâs middle nose and coo at him until he starts wagging his tail. When you turn back around, Hoseok is stumbling to keep his balance on the shaking ground. You laugh, which he does not appreciate, but before he can say anything in his defense, another soul is escorted to him by a Bones. The guy is already pleading with Hoseok, whoâs returned to the stony mask he usually wears. The silver aura that surrounds him always brings you comfort, reminding you of the moonlight that bathes the surface world, but it has turned colder and is as deadly as mercury. You envy the way he can switch back and forth between his professional mask and the bright, loving man you know; if only it were that easy for you. Without so much as a wave, you weave the shadows around you once more, ignoring the soul's cries to you for mercy, and let yourself disappear into the darkness.
When you emerge from the shadows, you settle at the base of your garden tree. The only living thing that would grow down here, the sole reminder of the world above. Its branches show that it should be close to the harvest soon, maybe a month away at the most. You reach up, weaving through the darkness to pluck a pomegranate from the tree. You don't even like pomegranates anymore, you think as you inspect it. Ripe, juicy, and utterly disgusting; the gods' idea of a joke. The thing that brought about your isolation, your solitude, yet it continues to be the only thing that grows in this wasteland.
You laugh bitterly before tossing the fruit up in the air, letting it fly through the shadows to land beside Hoseok, whatever he's doing. He always appreciates your little gifts, the only real thing you can do to show that you aren't cross with him and are glad for the work he does. He's long been stuck here with you, but the fruit doesn't turn to bile on his tongue the way it does yours. Perhaps the willingness he had that first time made a difference.
Please.
You glance around, looking for the voice that suddenly echoes around you. It's soft, a memory of a whisper. It's not rare for you to hear the voices of the dead in your realm, but this is different. This one strikes you to your core, for thisâŠ
This one sounds hopeful.
The prayers that make their way to you are never hopeful. They are sad or angry or scared, always filled with tears and regret and more than a little hesitancy, but never do they have any shred of hope in them.
You stand, eyes narrowed as you look through the darkness for whatever soul may be calling to you.
Please. I don't want to go back. Don't let her take me.
Without thinking, you reach into the shadows. The blackness swirls around your fingers, unsure where you're trying to go. You don't know yourself, and you wish you did. You aren't sure why you're doing this; you rarely answer prayers, least of all the ones that don't mention you specifically, but something in this voice calls to you. It resonates in your chest, shakes your very being because you remember that feeling. You remember the way it felt to be free, standing in the sun and clawing at the earth as Gaia dragged you back down to your post, tears mixing with the dirt as you pleaded, begged her not to take you back down there.
With a jerk, you pull the shadows apart, and the ground quakes above you. You watch, anxiety pooling in your gut, and it's only the intensity of your focus that lets you see it: a figure, falling limply through the earth that you've opened. The string of curses you let out would make even Ares blush, and it's with a rush you haven't felt in millennia that you weave the shadows together into a net and toss it upwards. The figure falls into it with ease, shadows wrapping around the body to glide gently downwards until they can deposit the person with ease at the roots of your tree.
Your breath catches in your throat as the darkness recedes, revealing soft mint hair with flowers woven into it, pale green robes that are sliced nearly in half at the back and caked with mud. The man is beautiful and soft and bright, every inch the antithesis to your own black and grey clothes. You hesitate to even look at him, too afraid of dulling that sun-kissed skin with the death you carry on your fingertips.
His brow furrows and he winces, though his eyes remain closed. You blink owlishly before guiding the shadows around him once more; when you're sure he's secure, you pull him along behind you until you reach the only spare room you have in the palace. You situate him on the bed there, fluffing pillows and smoothing blankets until you can almost pretend he fell asleep there of his own accord. With pursed lips, you assign three of your Bones to watch him; one just inside the door and two outside of it, just in case whatever he was running from attempts to come for him.
You don't want to leave him, but you have work to do, and the land of the dead cannot rule itself.
It's dark when he opens his eyes. There is Greek fire in the corner, and shadows dancing on the walls around it, but he cannot make out much else. When he sits up and slides his feet off what feels like a bed, he hisses. The marble is cold and unforgiving against the bare skin of his feet and he doesn't know of any feeling like it. He's too accustomed to the dirt and grass from his mother's domain, and even the white marble of Olympus was warm to the touch. This is different. Alarming. New.
He eventually works up the nerve to stand fully. Looking around, he doesn't see any kind of light sources other than the brazier in the corner, so he grips one of the coals in his palm and uses that bit of light to find the door. The fire tingles against his skin, but he's long since grown used to holding fire in his palms for his mother. The warmth is comforting for a brief moment before the image of his mother flashes through his mind. He flinches at the memory of her face, twisted with wrath, and the stone drops out of his grip before he can catch it.
The marble of the wall is cool against his back as he slides to the ground, knees brought up to his chest and his eyes screwed shut against the darkness. There's a vice around his chest and he can't breathe and he can't see and he doesn't have any idea where he is or if he's even alive or if she's stuffed him somewhere he'll never be able to escape and the thought makes his head spin as the air catches in his throat and gods don't even truly need to breathe and yet he can feel the cold claws of death tighten around his throat and all he can see in his final moments is the horrifying face of his mother's anger and he can feel the vines and roots around his ankles once more and-
"Who the hell are you?"
He looks up, pushing the sweat-covered hair out of his eyes. There's a man, in the darkness, who exudes a faint silver light around him that illuminates the walls and black marble floor. The man doesn't seem angry that he's there, or even all that surprised; just curiously resigned. There are so many questions on the tip of his tongue, so much he wants - needs - to know but only one makes it past the rock lodged in his windpipe.
"Am I dead?"
The man frowns and shakes his head. "I seriously doubt it, since you didn't cross the river." The man looks him over, taking in the flushed skin and sweat beads and the purple robes he donned the moment he decided to run and seems to decide something. He crouches down so he's eye level, poised on the balls of his feet with his elbows on his knees, and even in a full suit, he looks impeccably put-together. "I'm Thanatos. You can call me Hoseok. If you'll let me, I'd like to take you to someone who probably has a better idea of what you're doing here." All he can do is nod, and Hoseok extends a hand, which he uses to bring himself to a shaky stand.
"I'm Yoongi," He says, hesitant and quiet. "Um, I'm Kore. Or, Persephone. Either one."
"I think I'll stick with Yoongi," Hoseok says. His smile lights the hallway that Yoongi stands in, and it eases something inside him, though he isn't sure what. Hoseok doesn't let go of his hand as he guides Yoongi through the corridors, and talks to him the entire time. He speaks of his duties there, souls he's judged that day, ones he wished he could do more for, comforts Yoongi when a walking skeleton in Roman armor passes him and explains that those are the security force of the palace. By the time they make it to a large room, lit on each side with braziers of Greek fire that give the room an eerie glow, Yoongi has a fairly good idea of where he is, and who Hoseok is taking him to see.
The large ebony throne at the end of the room and the black-robed figure sitting atop it only confirms his fears.
When Hoseok enters the throne room, you're only slightly surprised. It wasn't entirely uncommon for him to take a break from his judicial duties, and so long as there were plenty of Bones to watch the gates, you had no issues. Years would sometimes pass before Hoseok needed to return, relieving the judgment council once more and returning them to their own afterlives.
To see him shadowed by the mint-haired boy you pulled through the earth, however, is a shock.
You set the papers you'd been writing at to the side. Your robes, woven from shadows and dipped in the Styx, swirl around your bare feet as you move to sit correctly with your back straight instead of lounging as you'd been doing before. The darkness youâd brought forth to cushion your chair, plump and fat and soft underneath you, shifts as well, keeping the hard edge of the marble from digging into your skin. Hoseok stifles a smile at the sight and you narrow your eyes at him. You wish he'd say something about it, the punk.
"What can I do for you, Hoseok?" You eventually ask as he and his companion reach the steps just below your throne. Even now, you can barely bring your eyes away from the boy behind him; he's radiant, the light in the room seemingly drawn to him despite the way he's slouched into himself.
"I was just wondering if you knew how this young man came to be in the underworld, my lady," Hoseok says. Your eyes dart back to him and you can't help the way your heart softens at the soft silver shine around him. You look to the mint-haired god again; his eyes dart around nervously as if he expects something to jump out at him, and he's close enough to Hoseok that if the other were to step back, they'd both likely fall to the floor.
You lean forward in your throne, doing your best to project a calm and friendly air to the shorter of the two gods. "Do you not remember?" You ask quietly. Your eyes don't leave his big brown ones, and you can see the moment the panic sets in. "It's fine, you don't need to answer me. Just know that you're safe here."
"Yoongi?" Hoseok says quietly, drawing the boy's attention. "Hey, it's alright. We're not gonna let anything happen." It takes several minutes but eventually the boy - Yoongi, apparently - nods. He hasn't relaxed at all, but he doesn't seem like he's about to bolt out of your throne room, so you consider it a success.
"You were praying," You tell him softly. "You asked for my help, so I gave it, as best I could. I don't think you meant for your words to reach me, but they did." Yoongi frowns ever so slightly as he takes in the knowledge. There's a hint of anxiety in his face, his brow furrowed adorably, but he doesn't startle when Hoseok rests a hand on his shoulder. He looks up, though, and the two of them seem to have a silent conversation. Something settles in your stomach, seeing the ease with which Hoseok interacts with him, and you swallow down the lump in your throat. It's ridiculous to feel anything like this; Hoseok is your subordinate and friend, and you've hardly known Yoongi for five minutes.
"He can stay here, right?" Hoseok asks. You look to Yoongi, wondering if he even wants to stay, if he even wants to be here at all or if he wished someone else had answered his prayers. Hoseok calls your name softly and your gaze flicks to him. "Can he stay?"
You find that you're debating with yourself. Yoongi clearly doesn't belong here; he is soft and sweet and gentle and completely at odds with the harsh, depressive atmosphere that lingers in your palace. He looks terrified even now as he takes in the room, eyes lingering on the bones that were fused together to make your throne. And yet...you cannot escape the fear and hope that had echoed in his prayer, the sheer desperation that someone would help him. He had been running and terrified, which could only mean that he was being chased by something or someone, and you couldn't force him out if he was in danger.
"If you would like to stay," You say after a moment too long, "Then you are, of course, more than welcome to do so." You rise from your throne, shadows dissipating as you do, and take a couple of tentative steps toward the pair. He doesn't shrink back in fear, which you take as a good sign. "The guest quarters will be yours to do with as you please. Hoseok can show you around the palace and grounds, so you don't get lost, and the Bones can bring you anything you require." You move to press a hand to Hoseok's arm, and you level him with a careful look.
"Of course, my lady," Hoseok says. He turns to Yoongi with a radiant smile. "And you can leave whenever you'd like."
"Of course," You agree quickly. "Hoseok can take you back and forth across the river as you wish. Charon can be quite fussy about it." Several times, your guests have been stuck on the wrong side of the river until someone brought your ferryman his payment. Yoongi looks slightly less terrified, and in the emerald glow of the fires, you notice how wide his eyes are. "Oh! You're from the surface, of course, I forgot."
With a snap of your fingers, the sconces along the walls light themselves, and the candles ringing the large chandelier in the center of your throne room surge to life as well. Yoongi startles a little, stepping closer to Hoseok.
"Ah, I forget you surfacers can't see as well down here," Hoseok mutters. "We'll get you a candlestick as well, just in case." He nods to you, Yoongi copying him in a most adorable way. They're halfway out of the room when a thought occurs to you.
"Yoongi?" You call after him. He turns, and the green halo around him makes your heart falter. "Don't eat the pomegranates. Not even the seeds." His brow furrows in confusion but he gives a hesitant nod before he turns and hurries after Hoseok.
As much as your chest aches for him, you won't subject him to this life. You watch him go and wonder how long he'll last in this hellscape.
When their shadows have long disappeared from the walls, you turn and retake your seat on the throne. With a wave, a small team of Bones appears in front of you - the same uniforms, with the same unit numbers, stamped on their dog tags, and the same haunted look where their eyes once were - and you do a quick count. Ten should do fine for what you need.
"Scour the earth. Do not speak to anyone. Find out what he was running from, and if it still searches for him. Don't let anyone see you, and don't let anyone know why you're looking. Return if you're in danger. Report to me immediately." They salute, and you watch their forms slowly disappear, becoming more and more transparent until they glide upwards and through the cracks in the ceiling.
You sit back and wonder how long it will take for you to get answers, and if it will be before or after Yoongi realizes he's too good for this place.
Yoongi is quiet. That's the first thing Hoseok notices about him. He doesn't initiate conversation, really, instead content to listen to Hoseok talk about the various souls he's judged and the occasional escape attempts someone has made. At first, when Yoongi speaks, he's quiet, like he doesn't really want - or expect - to be heard, and he always looks pleasantly surprised when Hoseok answers his question or responds to his comments.
It makes his heart ache, and he wonders what exactly Yoongi has gone through to make him so shocked that anyone would actually listen to what he has to say. It takes weeks for him to warm enough to Hoseok to start speaking more often, to ask questions about his day, to actually request specific things. The day Yoongi asked Hoseok, soft and hesitant, if he could show him the Meadow and the tree, Hoseok almost cried. Yoongi was so obviously ready to be told no, fully expectant for Hoseok to decline such a simple request, and it only reinforced Hoseok's need to give the god everything he could ever want.
"What are you doing, Yoongi?" Hoseok asks when he looks up. They're at the gates, Hoseok in the usual position, eyes roving over the lines of souls slowly shuffling forward, and Yoongi sitting nearby. Cerberus is curled up behind him, dwarfing the god with his massive body, all three heads snoring and slobbering as they sleep haphazardly on top of each other. Yoongi glances up at Hoseok as he grabs another flower from the basket beside him.
"I'm making Cerb some flower crowns," Yoongi answers as if it was obvious. Hoseok frowns.
"Flower crowns?" He echoes. "What's a flower crown?"
Yoongi gives him a disbelieving stare. "It's a bath salt. What the fuck do you think it is, Hobi? It's a crown made of flowers." Hoseok is caught off guard by the sarcasm, as he has been every time Yoongi has spouted off some kind of sass to him. He strides over and crouches beside the mint god to watch him.
Yoongi's fingers are sure and steady as he weaves the stems of the flowers together. It's already half-dozen, Hoseok thinks, the crocus blossoms blending together prettily and not straying in the slightest from where he places them. Hoseok hasn't ever seen anything like it, and he's entranced by the way Yoongi's fingers move and the way the flowers seem to just do whatever he wants without much coaxing on his part.
"I had the Bones bring me back a basket from their last excursion," Yoongi says. "Since none grow here." He stops with one last crocus and eyes it critically before apparently deciding it was good enough. Hoseok can't take his eyes off the thing, enraptured even as Yoongi sets it gently on his head. Hoseok can feel his eyes widen and his cheeks flush red.
"Thanks," He says after a second, one hand darting up to steady the crown as he shifts his weight. He smiles, unable to help himself and poses. "What do you think? Does it suit me?"
"Ugh, you wish," Yoongi says. Hoseok can see the smile in his eyes and is satisfied with the mirth threatening to bubble past Yoongi's lips.
"Y'know," Hoseok says after a while, hands in his pockets as he watches Yoongi make the second crown for Cerb. "I bet if you planted some seeds near the pomegranate tree, they'd grow." Yoongi's hands stop moving, his eyes drifting up to look past Hoseok. Something similar to excitement hides behind his eyes, and Hoseok wants nothing more than to bring it out to shine. Yoongi cocks a brow as if to say 'really' and Hoseok nods.
The gummy smile he gets in return, full of hope and light that the underworld hasn't ever seen before, is well worth the potential scolding you may give him for suggesting Yoongi fiddle with the tree's courtyard. And the way he keeps the flower crown nearby, hanging off a hook on the gates long after the blossoms have wilted and died, is worth the shy smile Yoongi gets every time he sees it.
You don't see Yoongi for the first few weeks he's there. Not really. You catch glimpses when he passes through the palace halls with Hoseok, and he sits with Cerberus while you visit Hoseok at the gates, but he makes no effort to seek you out, and you respect that distance. You can't bring yourself to force your company on him. You're an acquired taste; Hoseok has been in this realm for so long that he's accustomed to the darkness that follows you, the aura of death and despair that usually surrounds you. He's been surrounded by the dead almost as long as you have, so you know he can't be affected by it. Yoongi, thoughâŠ
Yoongi is life. He's the springtime blossoms in a summer breeze, he's the sound of birds chirping in the treetops, he's vibrant and fresh and lovely and you cannot ruin that. You can't watch him wither away like a winter garden, you can't watch the color drain from his skin until he's just as much a ghost as the souls that wander the Meadow, you can't let him become just as dead as everything else in this cursed place.
So you leave him be. You offer curt nods when you see him with Hoseok and polite waves because giving any more of yourself to him without letting yourself get closer would be too dangerous. Even with the distance you keep, your chest tightens with every smile that graces his lips, you ache to hear his voice even just once, and it's too much. It's too much for someone you haven't even had a real conversation with. Someone who looks at you with apprehension and anxiety, yet brings undeniable joy to the man you've always held in your heart.
It's too much for you to feel like this for someone who makes Hoseok smile as if he's seeing sunlight for the first time in thousands of years. You love Hoseok too much to stand anywhere near them.
You've been avoiding both of them for days. You can't bear to see Yoongi's gummy smile and Hoseok's adorable dimples as they gaze at each other, and you're busy enough to make a decent excuse for it. Expansion isn't difficult, but keeping it quiet is. Plus you've been on the hunt to figure out what had been after Yoongi with such ferocity that it sliced right through his robes and had him praying to anyone who would listen.
You had a few helpful leads, but nothing concrete, and it was more than a little frustrating. Which is why you find yourself stepping out of the shadows of the pomegranate tree, hopeful that it could help to ease even just part of the emotions rolling in your gut.
The sight of Yoongi surprises you, even more so when you see that he's on his knees beside the tree with dirt covering his hands and a smidge of something on his cheek. He looks absolutely wondrous, like everything you've been missing from the world above, and it would bring tears to your eyes if you let it because he's so far out of your reach.
"Hi," You say after a long debate with yourself. Yoongi's head shoots up and he fixes wide eyes on you. He reminds you of the ones who come to you with no memory of what's happened to them, scared and alone and about to get the worst news of their lives. "What are you doing?"
"I'm sorry," He says immediately. "I didn't mean to, not really. You just said not to eat them, and I'm not, so I thought it would be okay. Hobi suggested it and you two are so close that I figured he'd know if you'd be upset."
"I'm not upset." Your voice is as gentle as you can make it. "I'm just curious. Hoseok didn't mention anything to me, and no one really comes here."
"Oh." The relief is palpable as it courses through him, and he looks back down at the ground in front of him. "I'm just planting some flowers so I can make more crowns for Hobi and Cerb. The others died so fast, and I don't want to keep sending the Bones out to get more if I don't have to."
"Oh, you made the flower crown for Hoseok?" You'd figured as much. No one else in the underworld knew how to make them, and Yoongi was the only consistently around him. "He showed me that, it was gorgeous."
"Obviously, it was made by me, after all," Yoongi spouts. You gape at him, and he gives you a contrite grimace. "I'm sorry, my lady Hades, I forgot who I was with for a moment. It won't happen again."
"It should," You say before you can stop yourself. He glances at you curiously. "I don't mind if you're relaxed and casual around me. I've never been one to enforce the rules that Olympus has. Hoseok is proof enough of that. And you can use my name, I don't mind."
The way he whispers your name, almost as if he's practicing it to himself, makes your heart flutter in your chest. It's so dangerous to be around him like this, relaxed and casual; it's so easy to forget that it's Hoseok that gets this, that deserves this small piece of sunshine.
"Well," Yoongi eventually says. "In that case, you can get to work. I've got an entire basket of seeds left to plant around this thing, and I can only work so fast. Plus I'm getting hungry."
"Oh. Okay, show me what to do." You don't hesitate to mirror his position, robes bunching under your knees in the dirt as he points at the small holes he's carved out of the dirt with the trowel and rake the Bones nabbed for him.
Yoongi is patient, you learn. Not extremely so, but he walks you through what you need to do with clear directions. The seeds are small in your hands, which amuses you to no end, and there's an odd delight in packing the soil around them and dripping water down onto them after. You're smiling for the first time in...you don't know how long, and the feeling of Yoongi's hands around yours as he shows you how to use the trowel is something akin to paradise.
His hands are rough; calloused and weathered and wonderful against the softness of your own. You start to talk freely to him, asking him about each seed you plant and what they are and how they look. He tells you about each one, the deep timbre of his voice like music to your ears. He rolls his eyes at every joke you make, despite the way he smiles, and hits back with several quips of his own. He listens as you tell him, voice shaking, about the pomegranate tree, and how it curses anyone who eats its fruit to stay trapped in the underworld forevermore. He talks and listens and jokes and laughs and it's only after you've made a particularly ridiculous joke that you realize your mistake.
"You've spent too much time around Hobi," Yoongi says. "He made the same joke yesterday." He's looking down at the last few seeds, plotting where in the courtyard to put them, and doesn't see the way the smile dies on your face. You'd forgotten. For a brief time, you'd forgotten that this is just pretending.
You don't get to keep this. You don't get to stay here, in this courtyard, with Yoongi and his rough hands and the mint hair that falls in his eyes and his gummy smile. This isn't yours. You don't get flower crowns and jokes and soft kisses, no matter how much you want them, just like you don't get Hoseok's bright grin or his dimples or his long fingers intertwined with yours. Your heart aches for these two beautiful boys, both of them everything you could ever want in so many different ways. And yet you have neither of them, you don't get either of them. They are each other's, and there is no room there for the death you bring in your wake. You kill everything you touch; the mortals whisper about the cold grip of your hands on their neck as they pass over.
You look back over the seeds you've helped Yoongi plant and wonder how many you've killed before they even lived.
You stand and brush the dirt off your robes. "Well," You say, careful to keep your voice level. "I've got some things to do. I trust you'll be alright on your own." You can't bring yourself to look at Yoongi, can't bear to see the dirt that smudged along his cheek, can't stand to see the way the orange robes drape along him and remind you of the way the autumn leaves looked coating the grass in the meadows.
He doesn't even get a response out before you flee, but you feel his eyes on your back long after you've hidden in the shadows and sunk down onto your bed.
It's astounding, you think as you rinse the dirt off your hands later, how a single afternoon planting seeds with someone can be so detrimental to the walls you'd put around your heart. Tears blur your vision and your fingers are trembling, but you keep scrubbing until the phantom slide of his hands against yours is gone and there is no more evidence of the planting you'd done. When you finally stop, your skin is raw and throbbing, and there are tears running down your face.
You had long accepted that Hoseok could never be yours. You were in two different positions, and he was much too bright to want to be with someone like you. Your shadows would have suffocated him, so you resigned yourself to being his friend. Friend is safe. Friend is good. Â
Youâd known the same when you met Yoongi. Bright and colorful amidst the darkness of the underworld, you wouldnât dare to get any closer to him, too familiar with the fluttering of your chest and the jumping in your stomach every time you saw him. Just being friendly was enough, ensuring he is safe and happy is fine with you.
But this? Watching the two of them grow closer and closer, able to love each other so wholly while you stand alone in your darkness, watching their bright smiles and soft looks, all directed only at each other, for eternity? This was too much for you to bear. Being hopelessly in love with one man you canât have is bad enough, but two of themâŠ
You wish for the first time that you were not immortal, but a meager human upon the surface, unaware and blissful in your ignorance.
He never expected this. Not from the moment he woke up, not when he was sprinting through a forest to escape his mother, not for a single heartbeat could he ever imagined everything that has happened to him since he arrived in this cold land.
Heâs been alone for so long, hidden away in his motherâs garden with only the rare visit from Artemis or Hestia as he learned how to do anything and everything his mother wished. Heâs never had friends before, heâs never had the subtle inside jokes that he shares with Hoseok, familiar enough that even just a quick glance can have them both bursting with laughter. Heâs never known a goddess like you, able to weave together the darkness into something tangible, something useful, something real. Itâs like nothing heâs ever seen, and Hoseokâs uncanny ability to bend the environment around him and use his silvery aura to turn almost invisible to the naked eye never ceases to amaze him. The two of you are so powerful, so utterly awe-inspiring, and every single thing his mother had told him is so far from the truth that it almost hurts.
Neither you nor Hoseok is standoffish, really; he can see the hesitant friendship in every smile you send his way, and Hoseokâs primary concern at any moment is making sure heâs happy and safe. It warms Yoongi in a way he could never explain, not even in a million years, simply because heâs never felt this way. In all the books heâs read, the plays heâs seen, every mortal heâs watched, heâs seen this.
Heâs seen how they turn red with just a look, how their hearts stutter when hands brush, how they smile, soft and private when they think no one is looking at them. Heâs seen this feeling, the bubbling in his chest that he gets every time Hoseok laces their fingers together while walking and the moment you step into the courtyard and see the kaleidoscope of colors that you helped plant. He never would have guessed that he would feel it, though, too isolated from the rest of the world until he came here. Until you pulled apart the earth itself to help him escape, without even knowing why or who he was.
The feeling grows inside of him, thorns pricking into his every breath because he knows it canât last. Heâs seen how you and Hoseok look at each other when you think no one is watching, can feel the pull between you and the years upon years of familiarity that lie between you. The two of you are closer than he could ever get, two sides of the same coin, and more suited to each other than he would ever be.
And he canât stay.
Thatâs the worst part. He knows it, knows that she will find him before long and wrap her claws around his throat and drag him back into that gilded cage she calls a greenhouse just to leave him. Itâs for the best, my dear, sheâll say, itâs to keep you safe.
Yoongi doesnât want to be safe, though. He wants to be happy and free, and heâs found that place here, surrounded by death even as he carves out his own little area of life. With Hoseokâs warm grin across from him and your own cool fondness beside him. With flower crowns atop his head and Hoseokâs, and the small buds are woven into your own crown of bones and grief as a small reminder that even in death, there is life.
But she will find him. She always does. And though he cannot bear the thought of leaving you, he will, if only to keep you safe.
Yoongi's been there almost a year when you summon Hoseok to dine with you. By the time he gets to your office - a very understated term for the sprawling library - you're already sitting at your usual desk, food pushed aside and forgotten in lieu of the papers stacked in front of you. Â Even with your head bent low and bags under your eyes, you're the most beautiful person Hoseok has ever seen.
He remembers the first time he met you when Zeus had assigned him to be the gatekeeper for the underworld. You were so young, so skittish and worried that you were going to be a terrible ruler as if the dead could be disappointed in you. You'd been beautiful then, too, but not in the same way. You've grown into yourself since then; you're no longer afraid of being a bad queen. You know that you're competent and capable, you know you can do this, and you frequently prove wrong any Olympian who says otherwise. You're mature now; strong and confident and brilliant, and even with the bags under your eyes and the shadows that lick lovingly against your skin, you are absolutely radiant.
Hoseok is so in love with you that it physically hurts him, and every time he looks at you, he is reminded of how you are just out of his reach.
He clears his throat and you look up. The tired smile that graces your face warms him, and he settles into a chair on your left with practiced ease. This isn't the first time you've asked him to dine with you, and it won't be the last.
"What's the occasion?" He teases, delighting in the way you roll your eyes and gesture to the food and nectar that sits in front of him.
"How is Yoongi?" You ask. It doesn't escape him that you don't answer, but you always have your reasons, so he doesn't call you on it.
"Well. He wanders around on his own and doesn't seem to jump at the slightest sound anymore. He came with me the other day when I judged and managed to pick fifteen people for Elysium in a row." An expression passes over your face that he can't decipher. He continues anyway. "He still won't talk much about what happened, but he also doesn't seem to be in much of a hurry to leave. I imagine he'll get bored eventually, and we'll need to give Cerb extra treats when he does, but I'm not concerned just yet."
You nod and Hoseok starts to eat as you rifle through a few more papers. "You know he's Persephone?" You ask, and Hoseok nods. He'd forgotten to share that knowledge with you, but clearly, you had your own way of finding things out. "So then you're aware that his mother is Demeter."
Hoseok pauses for a minute. He swallows the food in his mouth and really looks at you for the first time since he sat down. The bags under your eyes are more prominent, and you're wearing your Hades expression. The one that stays professional and controlled and tells people nothing of your true thoughts. Well, people that haven't known you for more than a thousand years.
"Hoseok, he can't stay here forever," You eventually say. "She's been looking for him everywhere. The humans' crops are ruined, ice and snow have covered the earth, more people are dying than we can hold right now. She won't stop."
"And that means we kick him out?" Hoseok hisses. You close your eyes and he can feel the sigh you're holding back. "You said yourself that he could stay as long as he wants. You can't just rescind that because some wheat goddess is going on a rampage. We still don't know what he was running from, or if it's still out there, and I won't watch him-" He stops, frozen by the way you're pressing your tongue into the side of your cheek. It's the only tell you have and he rarely sees it, because you rarely keep things from him. "What do you know?"
You don't answer, and he repeats the question, louder this time, as he surges out of his chair.
"I was running from her," Yoongi's voice echoes through the library. You and Hoseok both turn to see him standing in the door, and Hoseok's heart swells at the sight. He's in soft, muted pink robes that Hoseok knows he made himself. His cheeks are rounder, and he's no longer curled in on himself. He looks stronger. Confident. Unafraid. "I was running from my mother. That's what you found out, right?" Hoseok looks to you, and the regret in your eyes just confirms it.
"I'm sorry, Yoongi, I was only trying to make sure you were safe, I didn't mean-"
"It's alright," Yoongi says as he moves to run his hand along your cheek. "I know." He smiles at you. Hoseok looks between the two of you - Yoongi's hand resting lightly on your cheek and a soft smile on his lips while his eyes crinkle with rare happiness, your own eyes wide and full of what can only be described as pure, unadulterated love - and his stomach rolls violently. Even after all the time Hoseok has spent with you, and with Yoongi, and the times he's entered a room to find the two of you in comfortable silence, he never expected this. He should've, he realizes; the two of you are a perfect match, complementing each other to near perfection, each fault being smoothed over by the other's strengths.
How could he have thought you wouldn't fall in love with Yoongi? Soft, kind Yoongi, who had just enough snark inside of him to make every word out of his mouth an unexpected joy. Yoongi who braids flower crowns with the flowers he's started to grow in the courtyard, surrounding the pomegranate tree with the beautiful blooms. Yoongi, who encourages Hoseok to judge more and more souls, ones that don't request it, who can somehow pick the good people from the bad just by looking.
And how could he have ever expected Yoongi not to fall for you? Strong and intelligent, determined and kind. You who opened your home to him in his most vulnerable moment and never expected anything in return. You who did everything in your power to find what was chasing him, and find a way to stop it. You, with your lonely smile and your bare feet. You, who Hoseok himself has been in love with for tens of thousands of years.
How could he have expected either of you not to fall in love in the months that you have known each other when Hoseok couldn't even stop himself?
âIâll go back to her,â Yoongi says softly, finally dropping his hand from your cheek and turning the radiant smile on Hoseok. âSheâll have no reason to continue this if I return.â
âI canât ask you to do that, Yoongi,â You say immediately. ââYou were desperate to get away from her, and...what she almost did to you, thatâs unacceptable.â
âLet her rage,â Hoseok agrees. âYouâre safe here, no one can get to you without getting through the two of us first, not to mention Cerberus and the Bones. No nature goddess will last in this place, not with our full force around you.â
âThank you, Hobi, but no. I canât ask you both to do that, not when it could end so badly for you. You donât know what she can do, itâs not-â
âYou arenât asking us,â You say. Your voice is as quiet as always, but thereâs a firmness there that Hoseok recognizes. Itâs usually saved for the throne room when some mortal has been particularly annoying or stubborn, and itâs a shock to see it directed at Yoongi. âWe are offering. Let us protect you, Yoongi. At least let me speak with Zeus about this. I may be able to convince him to intervene.â
Yoongi hesitates, the indecision is written all over his face, and Hoseok leans to lace their fingers together. Itâs a familiar gesture, done so often to prevent Yoongi from getting lost that itâs second nature at this point.
âPlease,â Hoseok pleads when Yoongi looks at him. âPlease, Yoongi.â
The reluctant nod is all the confirmation needed. Youâre already scribbling out a summons for Hermes to carry to the lord of the gods, and Hoseok is halfway through the halls to reinforce the gates and ensure Cerberus knows his task. He tries not to think about the way Yoongi lingered behind, one hand on your shoulder as he watched you write and the other caressing the flower-riddled braids heâd made earlier that day.
He doesnât think about it, because in the end, it doesnât matter. Hoseok is so deeply in love with the two of you, so grossly enamored, that he would go to the end of time itself if it meant keeping the two of you safe and happy. Even if that meant watching you love each other and not him.
âWhat do you mean, he wonât help?â
You massage your temples without looking up from the letter Zeus had sent back with Hermes. He was, unsurprisingly, not helpful. Hoseok had appeared not long after the messenger had left, and is, also unsurprisingly, irate.
âAccording to him, he has no dog in this fight, because Yoongi isnât his son, heâs Demeterâs, and if he were to get involved, heâd side with her since the humans are dying so quickly, which isnât exactly good for worship numbers.â
âAre you kidding me? He seriously said heâd take her side in this?â
âNot in so many words, but yes. And I get it, Hobi. His job is to keep the peace between everyone in Olympus, and without actually coming here to give me an audience, all he has is Demeterâs side of the story.â
âWhich is?â
âThat I kidnapped her son and am currently holding him captive in a dungeon down here.â
âThatâs absurd. Heâs not captive at all, heâs happier here than he ever was up there, and you didnât kidnap him!â You give a slight nod to show that yes, Hoseok, youâre aware of the truth. âDoes he know what she does to him? How she treats him?â
âHoseok, please,â You mutter. The weight of Zeusâ words is like a blade against your throat and you want nothing more than to help Yoongi. Clearly, the Fates have decided against that. âYou know how he is. Do you honestly think heâd care? She has a claim to him, despite what he wants, and unless we find a way to get Zeus down here or go there ourselves, our lord wonât be able to hear any other side of this story.â
âThen weâll...weâll go there! Weâll make them listen! You could talk sense into him, make him see that he needs to help.â
âYou know I canât do that, Hobi.â Hoseok flinches, as if just remembering that you are as captive here as the souls you keep. Youâre glad, not for the first time, that Death Itself cannot be contained, so that Hoseok, at least, is free to come and go as he pleases. âAnd before you say it, no, we canât ask him to go. It isnât safe. The second he sets foot outside this realm, sheâll pull him back. Weâre lucky that he hasnât already told her where Yoongi is.â
Your statement is punctuated with a muffled thud, and the anxiety that runs through you is mirrored in the look Hoseok gives you. Another thud echoes through the palace, the ground rumbling under your feet, and you stand.
âWhere is he?â You ask, already pulling the shadows around you.
âJust past the gate, walking through the Meadow. If we hurry-â
âGo.â You disappear into the blackness, never more glad that Hoseok can sense the living in your land. When you step away from the shadows, Yoongi is there, confusion written across his face and fear in his eyes. âYou have to run.â
âNo,â He says. âIâm not going to keep running from her. Iâm staying here, she canât take me back.â
âYoongi, please,â You beg. Heâs too vulnerable here, too open, too easily seen with his spring green robes billowing around his feet and flowers woven into a crown atop his head. He takes your hands in his and pulls you close, and youâve never seen a fire like this in him. It burns hot and strong and it makes your chest ache for what could have been.
âI wonât let her hurt you while I hide away like a coward,â He whispers. His thumb wipes away tears you didnât know were there, and determination floods through you.
"Please, Yoongi. Let us help you. Let me help you. I-" The words choke in your throat, but Yoongi nods as if they made it out.
"I love you, too." His voice is soft, barely audible over the shaking ground and the deafening sound of hooves slamming into your gates. You feel more than see Hoseok land beside you, and his hand rests on the small of your back without hesitation.
"Take him," You tell Hoseok. "Go to the palace. You'll be safe there. Don't let him leave."
Hoseok's eyes are fire-bright as he wraps an arm around Yoongi's waist. The god's protests fall on dead ears, even as you let your hands brush over the softness of Hoseok's ink black wings. Just one moment, that is all you want, just one single second to pretend.
"I'll see you after, my lady," Hoseok says firmly. You don't have the heart to correct him, nor the time, so you just nod. Yoongi's screams echo in your ears even as you turn, the blackness that lingers at every corner of your realm swirling around your feet and ready to be whatever you need. You let one last year fall from your eyes as the gates crumple, and the furious eyes of Demeter fixate on you and the black-winged figure carrying her son away.
Hoseok flies faster than he ever has, determined to get Yoongi into the palace and relative safety. The god sobs in his arms, still struggling to get back to where you stand in the Meadow, the massive form of Demeter towering above you, but Hoseok doesn't relax his grip. You gave him an order; he hadn't disappointed you yet, and he isn't about to start now. Not with Yoongi caught in the middle.
He doesn't hesitate when he touches down in the palace, wings retracted and brushing ever so slightly against the black marble floor. He turns to the nearby Bones and orders them to the doors, summoning as many others as he can spare from the gates and Fields to help barricade the palace from the goddess.
"Hobi, you have to go, you have to help her," Yoongi sobs. "She's gonna...I can't, Hobi, please, you have to keep her safe."
"I have to keep you safe," Hoseok replies. He's got a vice grip around Yoongi's arm as he pulls him deeper into the palace, doing his level best to avoid any window or door to the outside. "That was the order she gave and that's the order I shall obey."
"How can you say that?! Don't you care that she could-"
"Of course I care!" Hoseok spits, rounding on the shorter god the second the words leave his lips. "Do you think this is easy for me, Yoongi? Do you think I enjoy choosing between the two of you like this? Because I don't. I want nothing more than to be helping her right now, but I can't...I can't leave you alone here. It's too dangerous."
Hoseok isn't stupid; he knows exactly how he feels about you, and Yoongi, and he's not oblivious to the way the both of you look at him. Still, the two of you are powerful deities, worshipped and loved, feared and prayed to. He's just a guardian, content to sit in the background and watch for threats. Yes, he loves you, with every fiber of his immortal soul, but he also loves Yoongi, and he knows you love Yoongi, and you gave him an order.
"Hobi," Yoongi whispers, eyes wet and red and beautiful. "Hobi, please, you have to help her. She needs you. I can manage, I can hide, but she needs you. No one else can help her."
The fact that he's even considering this shows just how easy it is for Yoongi to manipulate him. Hoseok understands now, what you meant all that time ago. Yoongi's voice is rough and lingering and fearful but it carries so much hope that it digs into Hoseok's skin like a hook. He curses and bundles Yoongi into the corner.
"Stay hidden. Don't make a noise. You can't let her find you." Hoseok hesitates for a split second before pressing a quick kiss to Yoongi's forehead. "I will see you after this."
"I know."
It's never been harder for him to turn his back on someone, but Hoseok manages, with only one last look back before he takes to the air and surges forwards to where you stand, keeping Demeter back with every piece of your power.
Yoongi runs. He runs and runs and runs, the bare skin of his feet silent on the cool marble. The braziers have long since gone out, but he stopped needing them months ago. He knows where he is, even as he tucks himself into a small, nearly invisible niche in a corner. He hardly dares to breathe, too scared that the sound will alert his mother of his location. The palace is silent, not a single sound in the entire thing, and it's deafening in the aftermath of the rumbling screams that signaled your battle with her.
He isn't sure how he managed to convince Hoseok to leave him, whether it was the obvious love the god felt for you or the sheer desperation in his own eyes, but he could only pray the two of you made it out. As gods, you're all difficult to kill, but it's not impossible. Not for other deities.
Come out, little flower.
Yoongi stifles a whimper, panic coloring his vision white for a long while before he can breathe again. Memories flash behind his eyelids and he pried them open just to stare into the darkness.
You can't hide forever, little flower. You know that.
Her voice echoes against the marble. It makes her sound like she's everywhere and nowhere at once, able to find him even as he hides. He clenches his teeth and reminds himself that you and Hoseok are the only ones that know this palace better than him.
You're making me very angry, little flower. Why do you run? I only want the best for you, and you insist on causing such a fuss.
The sound of her sandals reaches him, reverberating off the walls and telling him that she's far too close. He slips silently out of the niche and pads across the floor on the balls of his feet. He doesn't make a sound, something he perfected in his time with her, and just as she slips around the corner, he's darting down another hallway.
Look at what you've done, little flower. All this mess, and for what? Do you like it when I'm angry? Do you enjoy this game of ours?
He slips into another hall just in time. Exhaustion has made him slow. The marble of the wall is cool against his heated skin, and he wonders where you are. Where Hoseok is. If you're alright or if you're laying in the Meadow, golden ocher pooling around you. The thought enrages him, and for the first time, he can feel power at his fingertips; real power, not the simple gardening magic she taught him as a child. He's ready to use it, he thinks. He's so tired of running, so tired of being afraid, and he's so fucking angry that the people he loves have had to fight his battles for him.
Found you, little flower.
Warmth circles his ankle and pulls before he can jerk away. Her nails are sharp than before, like sickles at the end of each long finger, and he scrabbles uselessly at the smooth stone floor. She's speaking but the sound of her voice - wind whispering through a field of wheat, a brook babbling in the summer - is drowned out by the blood pumping in his ears.
"No, I won't go back, you can't make me," He hisses, kicking at her hand with his free leg. He doesn't feel the cuts on his soles, doesn't register them at all until he sees the gold dropping onto the floor; the adrenaline masks the pain. She says something else and he stops kicking, though he doesn't know what she's said. He isn't listening, too busy thinking of a way out of this.
It comes to him, all at once, and he relaxes in her grip. His chest heaves in a sob, because he knows exactly what he has to do, and you will never forgive him for it.
"Alright," He says flatly. Demeter stops in her monologue. "I'll go with you. Just leave them alone." The smile that splits her face is more grotesque than any corpse he's seen in the Styx, but the way she releases his ankle is a blessing. He keeps himself hunched and downtrodden as he pushes himself up, into her waiting arms. The hug is bruising and brings vile to his throat, but it is necessary.
It's with a flash of green as he pulls away from her that he makes his move. The flower crown previously atop his head has morphed, grown into thick, thorny vines around her arms and keeping her in place.
Yoongi is gone before she can so much as screech, sprinting as fast he can through the halls to the one thing that can help him. He feels it when she rips through his flowers, his very soul shaking at the pain that rips through him, but he's determined. He's made good ground, he only had a little further to go.
The vibrant colors of the courtyard have never felt so welcome. He's halfway through, blossoms crushed under his feet as he tears through the carefully tended flowers, when she catches up. The blade of her scythe rips through his back, but the adrenaline masks the pain. He's bleeding, he knows, but he can't bring himself to focus on anything but the way the bark feels under his grip, branches reaching down to help him reach his goal.
She tears him out of the tree violently, no longer wearing the carefully sculpted mask of love. The scream that she unleashes when she sees him shakes the entire realm, soft pebbles falling from the ceiling of the cavern miles above his head, but he doesn't care.
The pomegranate is ripe against his tongue, juice tinting his lips pink, and the weight of it against his chest has never been more welcome. Demeter screams for what could be centuries, but Yoongi does not care, because he has won, and he has never tasted anything so sweet in his entire life.
"Come to bed," Hoseok pleads, not for the first time. You look at him with a sigh. His wings are gone, hidden away until he needs them again, and his arm is free of the bandages he's been wearing. It has taken so long for him to heal, and you still aren't sure he should be up and about. There's a small, barely perceptible scar along his forearm, the faintest reminder of what the two of you survived.
"I have to finish this before he returns, Hobi," You tell him, also not for the first time. Hoseok scoffs and comes around the desk to stand behind you, eyes roving over the documents in front of you.
"It's been over six months," He whispers in your ear. "Zeus has approved your expansion requests. I'm fine. You're fine. Yoongi will be back from Olympus soon."
"Hoseok," Your tone is warning despite the way he whispers your name. You deflate, falling back in your chair and letting him rub your shoulders. "I just miss him."
"I know. I do too." You're both quiet for a while. It has been six months since Demeter crashed into your world and rampaged through the Meadow to find Yoongi. You remember it so vividly, the way you struggled against the unbridled fury she had, the way Hoseok screamed as she broke his wing, the pain in your chest as you'd crawled to him and just held him in your arms until the Bones had made it to the two of you and carried him to the palace.
You had been, and still are, vastly proud of him and Yoongi for fighting back, but that didn't change the fact that they had both put themselves in immense danger by doing so. Even with the - admittedly brilliant, if stupid - plan that Yoongi had come up with, things never really worked out for you. Hoseok had been bedridden for weeks, unable to even more because of the pain in his wing. Hermes has helped with the healing process, which you were unendingly thankful for, but Yoongi had been carted off to Olympus almost immediately for negotiations.
Zeus, benevolent leader and incompetent moron that he is, had decided on a compromise: Yoongi would stay with you in the underworld after the harvest was finished, free to do whatever he liked, but until then he had to stay in Olympus. The letter had mentioned something about reparations to the mortals for the utterly obscene amount of crops they had lost - which was ridiculous really, they were doing their level best to kill the planet and you are gods, since when do gods pay reparations to mortals? - that Yoongi was required to use his abilities to help with.
You'd sent Hermes back with several colorful threats of what exactly would happen to the billions of dead you kept here should Yoongi return in any way other than utter perfection, and you've been anxious for days to find out whether you get to follow through on them. It only worsens when you remember that you have a decision to make when Yoongi returns. You remember the way he looked when he said he loved you, returning words you couldn't bring yourself to say, and you remember the elation and subsequent depression that came after the battle at the realization that you could have had him, were he not gone for half the year.
And yet you also distinctly remember the way Hoseok looked, wings splayed over several tables to hold them in place as they healed, vulnerable and shy as he told you that he was sorry for disobeying you. You won't ever forget his face as he explained, the way his lips formed around your name when he told you he couldn't beat to see you hurt, not after so many years spent loving you. The feel of his lips against your skin is like a phantom even now; Hoseok had waited until he was healed to do anything more than press chaste kisses against your knuckles, and even still you've not felt him the way you want, but it hasn't stopped him from trying.
"Come on, my lady," Hoseok says, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. "Just for a while." You grumble under your breath - you really do have work to finish before Yoongi arrives - but you allow Hoseok to pull you from your chair and lead you down the hall to your bedroom.
So lost in your own musings, you don't notice the figure lounging on your bed until he speaks.
"Six months and I don't get even so much as a hello?"
Your eyes shoot up and your breath hitches in your throat. Pale green robes lined in the most beautiful black and silver embroidery pool around him, matching the braided crown that rests atop his head. You didn't know flowers like that existed, let alone that they could look so wonderful on someone.
"I didn't know you were back," You breathe.
"That's the point of a surprise, my love," Hoseok says from behind you, hand tightening around yours. Guilt begins to grow in your chest and Yoongi tsks at you. He rises and comes to stand in front of you, brow furrowed.
"That's no way for a queen to look, is it? What has you thinking so hard?" His thumb smooths the space between your brows and you can't help the glance to Hoseok.
"I can't...I don't want to hurt you." Your voice is barely a whisper, and the familiar sting encircles your heart once more. You couldn't choose between the two of them, not if you tried, not even if it meant getting out of this place.
"You won't," Hoseok tells you with a familiar grin. "Yoongi and I have already talked about what we feel for each other, and for you. The only question now is if you'll have us. Both of us."
Months ago, you would have called them crazy and had them exiled for fear they'd gone mad. You never imagined you could have one of them, let alone both; you had been ready to tell them both that you had been mistaken because having one by your side while your heart still yearned for the other was far more cruel than anything you could put in the Fields of Punishment.
Now? Now you know what the Isles must feel like. It is Yoongi in front of you, thumb brushing lightly against your cheek while Hoseok's warmth is steady behind you, one arm encircling your waist and keeping you steady.
"Both of you?" You echo. Yoongi nods.
"You don't have to," Hoseok says from behind you. "But we know how you feel about us, and we're sure in how we feel for each other. There are stranger pairings in the world, aren't there?"
"Only one of you could be king." You aren't sure why you say that, can't remember why it even matters when Hoseok trails his lips over the shell of your ear.
"I never have looked good on a throne," He says. Yoongi's chest rumbles in a laugh, and you could cry at the sight of that familiar gummy smile.
"Please," Yoongi eventually says. "Please say yes." You search his eyes for any hint of indecision or regret, and when you find none, you turn to Hoseok. He has a soft, encouraging smile on his face, and he holds your crown in his free hand. The cool black metal is harsh against his tanned skin, but what draws your eye isn't the way the bones are fused together or the etchings of historical scenes across each. No, it's the soft pale green blossoms woven in among the metal, a stark contrast to the harshness of the bones, and the silver thread twined around all of it, dipping in and out in various places but clearly noticeable in the light. It's a perfect representation of the three of you and it makes your chest swell.
"Yes," You breathe. They don't move, and your eyes dart between them. "Yes, absolutely. I can think of nothing I have ever wanted more."
Yoongi surges forward, capturing you in a long-awaited kiss. His lips are soft as blossoms against yours, warm and gentle as the hands that cup your jaw and draw you closer. You're aware, distantly, of the soft clink of metal on stone as Hoseok sets your crown to the side, though his arm never leaves your waist.
Hours could have passed with Yoongi kissing you. You aren't sure. Time runs together and blends, a dizzying whirlwind of slow drags of his lips across yours followed by quick, messy bursts of his tongue. You can barely focus on what is happening, mind split between the absolute euphoria of kissing him and the heat that comes from Hoseok's fingers dancing along your waist and shoulders, his breath ghosting over your neck as he watches. When Yoongi finally detaches from your lips, he ducks down to suck at the exposed skin of your collarbone, and Hoseok turns your chin so you face him.
"May I, my lady?" He asks. His voice is rough and deeper than you're used to, affected by the sight of you and Yoongi. His fingers twine with the strings holding your robes together and you give him a nod. It doesn't even take a full breath before the black material is pooling at your feet. Hoseok stifles something that sounds suspiciously like a moan behind you, and you think Yoongi actually purrs. They both run their hands along your skin, basking in the goosebumps that they raise and the shivers that crawl up your spine.
"Absolutely ethereal," Yoongi mutters. You pull him into another kiss, one hand coming up to rest against his shoulder while your other tangles in Hoseok's hair where he's doing his level-best to leave his mark on your neck.
"Please," You murmur. "I want to make you happy."
"You've already done that, my queen," He says. His smile is soft and the glint in his eye is sharp. You huff a little and tap twice at Hoseok's neck; when he pulls away, pouting but compliant, you push Yoongi until he's falling back onto your bed. He goes with no objections, one hand twining his fingers with yours and you crawl up to straddle his hips. "Let me please you, my queen. I've been waiting six months to taste you, and I don't want to waste another moment if I don't have to."
Your breath hitches as Hoseok steps up behind you. The bare skin of his chest is a shock as it presses against your back, and he slides his hands along your sides before beginning to tease your nipples. You stifle the moan, emitting more of a whine than anything, and you think you nod. All you know is the heat between your legs and the knee-deep ache to make them happy.
Yoongi's between your legs in a flash. You can't be sure how exactly he moved so quickly without jostling you, but the thought is all but shoved out of your mind as he swipes his tongue against you for the first time. You're glad Hoseok is behind you because your legs are already trembling where they're curled under you and your head drops back to rest against his shoulder. As merciless as Hoseok is in his torment of your chest, Yoongi is doubly so.
You imagine a man starving and dehydrated in a desert wouldn't be this invested in a sudden banquet laid in front of him; Yoongi worships you, circling your clit several times before dipping down to dart teasingly in and out of your hole. He laps up every single drop of your arousal, dutiful in his mission even as Hoseok begins to whisper sweet nothings into your ear. The heat of his breath has you closer to the edge than you want to admit, but the sheer love that radiates from his words at the same time Yoongi rumbles out a heavenly moan straight into your folds, tongue buried inside of you, is what drives you over the edge.
You aren't surprised when neither of them stop; you get the sense Yoongi is thoroughly enjoying himself between your thighs, based on the growing tent in his robes. Hoseok grinds against your ass, and his own hardness presses against you with every painless thrust of his hips. A pang of guilt shoots through you and your hands drop. It's a bit of an awkward angle, but you make it work as you glide your hands over him. He's thick, that's for sure, and nearly as long as your forearm. How you're supposed to take that inside of you is anyone's guess, but as Yoongi brings you to yet another orgasm with his mouth, you realize that's exactly what they're preparing you for.
The whimper comes unbidden, walls clenching around nothing at the thought of them filling you, and they both shudder. "Please," You gasp, "Please, I need you. Both of you."
Yoongi graciously lets you rise off of him, and when you settle on your back, he sits up to smile at you. His lips and chin are absolutely coating in your slick, the sight erotic and exciting. The feeling is doubled as Hoseok grips Yoongi's chin, turning the mint-haired god to face him.
"How does she taste, my flower?" He purrs. You don't hear Yoongi's response, just the deep thrum of his voice, but you see the way Hoseok runs his thumb across Yoongi's lips, collecting your juices, before sliding it into his own mouth. You moan at the sight, Hoseok's eyes falling closed as he relishes in the taste of you. Yoongi strips out of his robes while he can, and he doesn't seem to miss the way your and Hoseok's eyes watch hungrily.
"Tell me what you want," Hoseok says, pulling you closer as Yoongi settles behind you. "We're here for you, my queen."
"IâŠ" You falter. You aren't even sure what you want now; you've spent six months trying to figure out how to tell both of the men you love that you can't be with either of them and now you have both of them naked in your bed, waiting to please you. You can hardly think, can't focus beyond the feel of their skin against yours and the heat of their gaze, but you know one thing.
You need them to know how desperately you love them, and with the fire burning between your thighs, there is exactly one way you can do that.
"I need you inside me, Hobi," You tell him. "I need to feel you inside of me. Yoongi, too. Both of you." Hoseok's cock twitches and something in his jaw clicks. You don't wait for more of a response, choosing instead to slide across the sheets to straddle Hoseok's hips. His hands rest lightly on your hips, tentative now, and you smile at him. His hands are gentle now, soft as the smile he gives you in return. His cock is dripping and red, a warm heat in your palm as you guide him to your entrance.
The look in his eyes, the small moan he releases, the hitch in Yoongi's breath behind you as you slowly sink down onto Hoseok will forever be etched into your memory. You're so full that you could cry; he feels absolutely perfect inside of you, and it only gets better as he guides you carefully up and then back down onto him. Your moan is felt more than heard and it only gets louder as he speeds up. His fingers are marble against your his, unmoving and firm as he slides in and out. He doesn't look away for a second and neither do you; all the years you've spent thinking about him, the millennia you've ached to love and be loved by him, it has all led to this. Your hips moving against his, connected in a way you've never been before; if it were possible to read his thoughts, you think you could at this moment, because they must be a mirror of your own.
"I love you," You whisper. Yoongi's warmth presses against your spine as he slides a finger between the two of you to rub slow circles into your clit, and you gasp. "I love you, Hobi, so much." The words are a mantra on your lips, and you think there may be tears in his eyes but you can't be sure because you're coming again, shuddering on top of him, and Yoongi is gently pulling you off.
Hands turn you, and now it's Yoongi between your legs, cock red and throbbing where it sits against his stomach. He isn't as long as Hoseok, but he's wider, and you clench again at the sight.
Yoongi opens his mouth to say something, but you stop him with a soft kiss pressed against the corner of his mouth. You slide down onto him, welcoming the slight burn that comes with the stretch. It takes two breaths for you to become impatient and begin to move, grinding your hips down against his. Yoongi isn't as loud as Hoseok, soft pants and whines where Hobi is echoing moans and groans, but it's just as attractive. He moves his hips in tandem with yours, and the muses themselves couldn't have created a better rhythm. The words fall from your lips again; it's easier, now that you've said them to someone, to let them go. They don't ball in your throat, aren't a lump to swallow down anymore, and you revel in the feeling.
"I love you," Yoongi returns, thumbs ghosting over the skin of your thighs. "So much, both of you. Saved me, can't fucking...fuck, can't tell you enough." You nod and loose another moan when Hoseok slides a finger in alongside Yoongi's cock.
"Do you think she can take us both, my flower?" Hoseok asks. His voice is raspy in your ear and you shudder as you orgasm again. There's a moment when you wonder just how many times you can come from the two of them, but it's gone the second Yoongi speaks.
"I think she could," Yoongi responds. "She's certainly wet enough. Absolutely soaked, aren't you, my queen? Do you want that? Both of us in here, filling you up?" He punctuates every word with another thrust of his hips and you nod. You don't think you've ever wanted anything more.
Hoseok is careful as he fingers you, working you open with one, then two, then three fingers as Yoongi slides in and out. You'd commend them both on their stamina if you could spare a single thought to anything but the feeling of them. Yoongi looks wrecked, covered in sweat with swollen lips, panting and desperate as he writhes beneath you.
When Hoseok finally decides you're ready, he slides his fingers out and asks you again if you're sure. You barely have the presence of mind to nod, too close to coming again, but it's enough for him. He slides in, and all three of you are moaning. You can't be sure what it feels like for them, but you're in absolute bliss. Hoseok peppers your shoulder with chaste kisses, murmuring encouragement as he sinks deeper inside. His cock drags against your walls and Yoongi's dick, and the thought makes you clench around them both. You're so full, you may explode, but it's perfection. When Hoseok bottoms out inside of you, you're all still for a while, just getting used to it.
"You're perfect," Hoseok whispers into your skin. "Both of you, you're both fucking perfect. Fuck, can I-?"
"Yes," You interrupt. You're already grinding down onto them, desperate for any kind of friction. "Please, Hobi." He grunts as he starts to move, and Yoongi does the same. They get a steady rhythm after a while, one sinking in as deep as he could get as the other drags outward, only to slam back in at the last second.
A sob builds in your throat, the sheer pleasure rolling through your body too much to handle as orgasm after orgasm slammed into you. There are hands everywhere, two on your hips keeping you steady, two roaming your body and teasing your nipples, on one Hoseok's neck to keep him close as another rests lightly against Yoongi's throat. You aren't sure which are yours, can't tell where you end and they begin, too fucked out to be able to think beyond the drag of their cocks against your walls and the growing ache inside you.
"Please," You gasp. "Please, need it. Fill me, please, need you both to fill me, make me yours, forever. Mark me. I'm yours, always, please, fill me with you." They both groan at that, and their pace speeds up. They're hitting harder and deeper and brushing against the spot inside of you that makes your vision turn white. Something gushes down your thighs as you spasm around them wildly, hips jerking of their own accord, and you feel it as they come together, hot seed spilling inside of you as you ride out your highs together.
You're panting and sweaty and hot and still, you don't think you'd trade this for even a moment of sunlight. They slide out of you and their cum seeps down your legs before you can stop it. You fall to the bed beside Yoongi, chest heaving even as he wraps you in his arms. A wave of your hand creates a small fan near the bed, shadows churning out cool air that feels like ambrosia on your skin.
Hoseok reappears with water for you both, and you thank him. Your voice is nearly gone, but it's worth it, you think. You pat the space beside you and Hoseok climbs in. His skin is hot against yours; the three of you are essentially a furnace at the moment, but you can't bring yourself to care. You can't count how many orgasms you had or how long you spent with them; it could have been minutes or hours or even days. It doesn't matter to you, really. Sprawled between an already-sleeping Yoongi and a Hoseok that's tracing invisible designs onto your skin, you have everything you could ever want.
Later you sit atop the shadows near your bed, chin in your hand as you admire the card between your fingers. Yoongi and Hoseok are wrapped around each other in your bed, lightly snoring as the sheets rise and fall against their naked chests. As you watch them, Hoseokâs brow furrows and he lazily stretches his arm to pat against the bed in search of you. He snuffles a little, and Yoongi nuzzles deeper into the crook of his neck until theyâre both quiet again.
Silver foil glints in the light and you look back at the card in your hand. Thereâs a stack a hundred high beside you, all of them identical to the next save for the curling letters that make up the recipients, but this one is special. This one is your favorite. If you didnât absolutely have to send it off, you would frame it and hang it above your throne; ultimately, though, youâd rather bask in the aftermath thatâs sure to come.
With a small smile, you set it atop the others and wrap the bit of twine around them all. Itâs gone with a wave of your hand, no doubt appearing wherever Hermes is. You wish you could see the look on his face when he realizes what they are, but heâs not the one that you really wish you could watch.
The raspy call of your name brings you back to the present, and you look up to find Yoongi watching you, lids heavy with sleep and eyes dark. âWhat are you doing?â He asks.
âNothing.â You grin and stand, letting the shadows underneath you fall away. âJust sending out a quick notice.â You slide in beside him and Hobi, the latter still asleep but turning to wrap his arms around you nonetheless. Yoongi presses kisses to your knuckles and you pull a stray flower petal from his hair.
âYouâre gloating, arenât you?â He mutters. Thereâs a smile behind his eyes, and it warms you.
âMaybe a bit.â You lean over and kiss him, gentle and tender and you hope that it conveys everything you canât put into words. âWould you rather I didnât?â
âNo,â Yoongi answers after a long pause in which he moves to straddle Hoseokâs hips in order to get close enough to suck marks into your neck. His lips are slow against your skin, tired and lazy from sleep. âI think I enjoy this side of you, actually.â âI, for one, am very much enjoying this side of you.â You grin at Hoseokâs words, smiling down at him. Heâs half-hard again, hands resting lightly on Yoongiâs hips and eyes fixed on the bruises that bloom on your neck. âI thought we were sleeping.â
âWe were,â You tell him. âYou can always go back to sleep if you want.â
âYou wish,â He mutters. Yoongi groans against your neck and you look down to see Hoseok palming him, working him up to fullness as Yoongi fucks into his hand. You wrap one of your own around Hoseok and return the favor; the way his moan echoes through the room is better than anything the nine muses could have created.
Itâs slow and tired, each of you already spent from your earlier activities, but when you eventually drop between them, chests heaving from your orgasms and already half-asleep again, you think itâs worth it.
When you wake later and find a card sitting on the flower-woven throne - a new addition to the hall, one most welcome - crumpled and half-torn with a thorn sticking out of it, you know itâs worth it.
#bts fanfic#yoongi fanfic#hoseok fanfic#jhope fanfic#suga fanfic#bts smut#yoongi smut#hoseok smut#bts fluff#bts angst#yoongi fluff#yoongi angst#hoseok fluff#hoseok angst#fic: from eden#ddaenggtan#jhope x reader#suga x reader#yoongi x reader#hoseok x reader#reader insert#kpop fanfiction#bts fanfiction#greek god bts#persephone yoongi#thanatos hoseok#hades reader#greek god reader#olympian bts#series: monsters and gods
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Esfâs One Year Anniversary Pop Quiz / Q&A
Hello đ„șđđœđđœ a lovely little birdie sent this to me. đžđ Itâs so pretty (and the cinnamon flavor baekhyun, I- *clears throat* moving on! đł )
-Sorry if it gets lengthy Iâm NERVOUS -
~THE QâS~
1. Do you remember what you felt when you posted your first story here?
Hmm⊠When I posted my first story⊠Well, my first ever post was a baekhyun one shot, but story wise, Six Phases had me nervous. I didnât consider it as my strong suit and it takes a whole 30k to even reach any smut đ
. Very nervous and shy as it is my first time writing such a long Baekhyun story as well.
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2. What do you hope people take away/think when reading your stories?
I hope that everyone sees (-here we go-) that as humans we are flawed, but imperfectly perfect in our own unique ways. We can have some of the most ridiculous fights, experience heart wrenching moments, fall short in doing things sometimes, or fall so hard in love we donât quite know what to do with ourselves. But as long as we strive to grow from our mistakes, stick up for ourselves, and make sure we have the right people cheering us on from the bleachers, we will be okay.
And we can do anything we set our mind to do. Hopes of friendship. Dreams of careers. Courage to fight for what we love even if we have to show vulnerability to get there. Because life is short, and to leave some things unsaid can be the worst feeling imaginable.Â
So donât be afraid to speak up about what you want, need or how you are working to be the best version of yourself for yourself and those that matter to you. And that it is okay if you trip, stumble or fall down; take three steps back or take a rest. As long as you keep moving onward, the sky's the limit.đ«
(This got really long oops >.< Next!)
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3. Whoâs your favorite character? Why?
This is probably a given but itâs Riley from Six Phases! Besides the fact that she is a part of me (relatively out-going, fun loving, dance-a-hol-lic, one of the bros and a living reeseâs cup ((hard shell, warm inside))~) She is so strong to keep her head high in the face of injustice despite the tears that brim her eyes, courageous to go out of her comfort zone for the sake of others - and to test her own limits - while fearlessly staying true to herself no matter what comes her way. Her softheartedness may make her a bit too easy at forgiving people, but hey, she rather spend her life having as much fun as possible. (And she isnât afraid to hold a grudgeđ).
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4. Whatâs your favorite smut scene?
Hehehe đđ let me go grab a snippet~:
You bite hard on your lip. Complexion taking on a vibrant red hue as he runs his nails up your denim-clad thighs. âI know how much you love it when I come inside you.â He chuckles humorously, quickly wetting his bottom lip as you let out a whimper. âYour pussy practically begs for it.ââB-Baek,â You breathe, feeling way too hot in your warm clothes and under his toned skin.âTell me, would you like it?â He tilts his head, fingers painstakingly popping the button to your jeans and pulling down the zipper, âBeing filled up with my cum. Fucked so good that your stomach swells with my baby?â
-Need, Feb 24th 2020
I feel that this is self explanatory, but in case it isnâtâŠ
Need Baekhyun f*cking you hard while telling you he knows you like it when he c*ms inside you, fu*ks me up all day EVERY day. Breeding/Impregnation kink is everything okay bye-
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5. If you had to write about anyone but Baekhyun, who would you choose?
Minseok. I wish I was confident enough in writing him with a leading (haha ;)) role because Iâd gladly have him rearrange my insides- I mean, what? đ
âŹâ©âȘâ© âŹâ©âȘâ© âŹâ©âȘâ©Â
~THIS OR THAT~
Baekâs mouth on you VS. Your mouth on Baek
Honestly⊠đłđłđłÂ *neatly stacks a few sheets of smut on my desk, clearing my throat* âŠâŠHIS MOUTH-
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Sex w. B, but without Sound Vs. Sight
Without Sight because I need to hear those sexy moans and groans of his. And not being able to see what he does next...only being able to rely on sound, touch, taste⊠(pretty sure there is a 5th sense Iâm missing but half of me is still stuck on the thought of his mouth-)
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Breeding VS. Choking
Oh. Bet. Breeding for the win. Like yes he can choke me any time any day but if there is no cum involved how do you reach the highest level of pleasure!? (with plenty of good health in mind, of course).
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Cake batter VS. Baby batter
DGHDFDKHGDHKG omfg you are so wrong for this đ€Łđ€Łđ€Ł I love it. Baekhyunâs baby batter. Cake is good, but a symphony of Baekhyunâs gorgeous groans while he ascends to a higher realm from the works of your mouth? (These thoughts are exactly why I have this username, huhđ€đ§ )
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Daddy B. VS. Husband B.
I love Daddy-I meanâŠđł OKAY YES I DO love Daddy Baekhyun, but nothing compares to Husband Baekhyun. If youâre gonna be spanking my ass red, you better have put a ring on my finger AND tell me you love me afterwards. (Plus, who doesnât want to hear his honey smooth voice whisper, âMrs. Byun.â From the intimate space of your shared bed? đ„ș)
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PS: Any words for your followers?
Not to be mushy as heck but thank you all for reading, enjoying, supporting, telling me your thoughts on my stories and just interacting with me in general.đ„șđ„°đ I love talking to you all, it makes my day đ« Never be afraid to send an ask my way, or drop anything in there. I donât bite (only Baekhyun đ muhahaha).
Sorry this ended up being as long as a one shot YIKES but I love you guys. Have a marvelous Sunday đđđčđžđ«đ„°
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All I Want For Christmas (Are Earplugs)
Ficlet: 3k of fluffy, explicit (at the end) Christmas-y DeanCas.Â
The challenge: "Write something about Cas being stuck in the gas n sip where "All I Want For Christmas is You" plays on an endless loop for 3 months until he's nearly homicidal đ ...and then dean shows up and they bang in the storeroom while it's playing and the song is still awful and plays every 45 minutes but at least Cas has a positive memory to associate with it now!"
Read it on AO3:Â https://archiveofourown.org/works/21656614
Or check out this excerpt (cut because Tumblr will eat my smut):
Corporate doesnât even hold off until Thanksgiving is over to move onto Christmas, not anymore. In the age of instant gratification and having everything a person could possibly want only a finger swipe away, waiting until after Thanksgiving to break out the Christmas theming would render it all relatively pointless. Thus, the day after Halloween, thatâs when it starts these days. Castiel doesnât get it, not really, especially considering the GasânâSip is, well, a gas station. No one is looking to their shelves for holiday sales and the opportunity to grab this seasonâs hottest items before they sell out. Not unless one considers snack cakes and travel-sized tubes of toothpaste to be the perfect holiday gifts. Not that Castielâs judging.
Itâs just that those realities make the auditory horror Castielâs subjected to for nearly three months straight all the more baffling. Why he has to suffer so the GasânâSip can claw uselessly at retail relevance is beyond his understanding. Itâs not as if theyâre succeeding. That little âLast Minute Gifts!â display doesnât get any sort of play at all until the twenty-third, and even then people have to grimace their way through choosing between cheap shower product sets and crappy mugs with teddy bears holding chocolates stuffed inside them. By November first, Castielâs already practicing the most tactful ways to interrupt those poor procrastinating saps and suggest simply buying lottery scratch-off tickets.
The thing is, the decorations arenât so bad. A little tinsel here, a few red glittery signs there, couple of candy-filled endcaps with Santa theming, whatever. Even the little Christmas tree that sits next to the register and Castiel canât stop knocking into with his elbow every time he goes to make change is more festive than frustrating. None of those things are particularly bothersome at all. In fact, Castiel barely even notices them (aside from diving to catch the tree and keep it from crashing to the ground every ten minutes). And the twinkling, color-changing string lights that Castiel spent the better part of a day stapling around the top of the store, along the windows, and over the register are actually fairly enjoyable to look at. So much so that he strung a set around the shelves of the storeroom for when heâs stuck back there organizing or doing inventory. Very cheery.
But the songs. The songs are the worst. Well, no, thatâs not exactly it either. The holiday songs on the corporate-provided CD that loops endlessly on a forty-five minute spiral in the background definitely still play in Castielâs head long after heâs dumped the coffee, turned out the lights, and locked the gas station doors. They infiltrate his quiet moments in the evening after heâs returned home, dance across his mind obnoxiously when he should be enjoying his free time away. Itâs only the beginning of December and already Castielâs starting to lose his mind. Last night, full of a spectacular dinner and tucked warm and snug in bed with Dean squirming underneath him, Castiel was screwed out of an actual orgasm by the painfully catchy crooning of Mariah Carey relentlessly belting out those high notes in his head.
Because really, at the end of the day, itâs not all the holiday songs, itâs that holiday song. The bane of retail workers everywhere, Castielâs sure of it, âAll I Want For Christmas Is Youâ is single-handedly making his holiday season as un-merry as it could possibly get. A grating earworm thatâs starting to feel more ânails on a chalkboardâ than singing at all, Castielâs forced to enjoy it on a repeat cycle every forty-two-point-five minutes of every single workday. And now, itâs messing with his off-time, his intimate evenings with Dean, those relax and reset moments that Castiel counts on to get him through the next day and the one after that. Retail is hard enough on a regular old Tuesday, never mind during the holiday season when everyoneâs so desperate to squeeze in as much merriment as possible that theyâre willing to steamroll right over people like Castiel to do it.
Most of the time, Castiel doesnât mind being a faceless cog in the machine, hell, he enjoys it some days. Thereâs a quiet dignity in his job, in providing food and fuel for weary travelers just trying to get from Point A to Point B. Keeping the coffee pot full, the hot dogs warm, the cigarette cartons stacked. Perhaps other people might look down on him for being satisfied with that type of work, that type of life, but Castiel has no interest in what other people think of him. Well, anyone besides Dean, of course. And Dean loves him, is proud of him, and thatâs more than enough to make his days, every single one of them, merry and bright.
So it would be Castielâs preference that he subsists through the rest of the Christmas season without murdering the one man who makes his existence tolerable, and that fucking song is beginning to threaten that theoretically simple wish.
Today, for instance, itâs four in the afternoon and Castiel is working a double. Which means that since the GasânâSip opened its doors at six AM, Mariah Careyâs syrupy-sweet caroling has set his teeth on edge going on fourteen times. Fourteen. Chinese water torture would be kinder. Two hours and two more rounds of the nightmare in G Major later, Castiel texts Nora, his manager, and begs her to let him change the music. â Just for the today, just for the rest of my shiftâ, he pleads, even going so far as to say heâll tune the radio to their local Christmas music station.
Nora sends back, â LOL, Castiel youâre so funnyâ, and Castiel dies a little bit inside. Business is slow and the lackluster trickle of customers comes to a stop completely around ten PM, leaving an entire hour for Castiel to count down the minutes to the next time that awful song is going to play without any kind of distraction. When the bells tied to the doors finally jingle signaling a customer around ten forty-five, relief doesnât even come close to what Castiel feels. That doubles when the face that appears across his countertop is Deanâs.
âHello, Dean,â Castiel says warmly, and heâs not exaggerating when he thinks he may never have been happier to see the man. Although, itâs never unpleasant to see Dean.
âI'll have some beef jerky and a pack of menthols,â Dean replies cheekily, leaning across the counter for a kiss which Castiel gladly provides. Not the menthols, though.
âFunny,â he murmurs and then sighs heavily. âDean, Iâm going to lose my mind if I have to put up with thisââ Castiel jams his finger in the direction of the ceiling speaker above his head, â Horror show for another three weeks.â
Dean looks up from where heâs fingering the different flavors of Bubble Yum and slides a pack across the smooth surface, reaching for his wallet to pay. Castiel waves him off, grabs a couple of singles from his own pocket and runs the transaction absently. âIt canât be that bad,â Dean says and Castielâs fingers halt mid-button-push.
âMy ears feel like theyâre bleeding, Dean,â he protests with a glare. âEvery forty-two-point-five minutes exactly it comes on and Iâm in hell.â Clocking Deanâs badly-suppressed smirk, Castiel works his jaw and folds his arms across his chest. âPerhaps Iâll call Bobby and offer him a free month of advertising in the GasânâSip window. All heâll have to do is play a particular CD on repeat in the auto-repair bay from tomorrow until Christmas.â Satisfied with the way Deanâs face pales and the smirk disappears, Castiel feels absolutely no need to remind him that approving free advertising isnât remotely in his job description. Honestly, if Dean canât figure that out from the knowledge that he isnât so much as allowed to change the storeâs chosen music, thatâs on him.
âDonât mess with my classic rock, Cas,â Dean warns him. âSome shit is sacred, you know.â Annoyed again, Castiel raises his hands and gestures around him emphatically. âAlright, alright,â Dean relents. âI see your point, it sucks.â Sucking his lip distractedly in between his teeth, Dean glances around the store. âSo, where are your security cameras at?â
Rolling his eyes, Castiel points to several different corners and just above his head behind the register. âThere, there, there, and there. Donât you think if I could have moved them, I would have? Changing their direction sends a notification straight to Noraâs phone.â
âThatâs not what Iâwhat about the storeroom? There any cameras there?â
Castiel narrows his eyes and regards Dean curiously. âNo⊠There was one, but it broke weeks ago and Corporate hasnât yet responded to Noraâs service request.â With a mild hum and another glance around that includes a sweep of the deserted parking lot outside, Dean wanders over to the doors and locks them. âDean?â Castiel doesnât protest, just watches as Dean flips the sign that says, âBack in 5 minutes!â Castiel rarely uses it himself, but every so often nature calls and the store has to be locked in the meantime. Itâs interesting that Dean remembers that.
âCâmon,â is all Dean says on his pass back through the store, reaching out to grab Castielâs arm and tug him out from his little alcove and across the floor to the storeroom.
âDean, whatââ
âHow long until that song plays again?â Dean asks as he pulls Castiel inside and shuts the door behind them.
Checking his watch, Castiel does some quick mental math as well as cocks his head to listen for whatever song is playing now. âItâs next,â he groans, but Dean just grins.
âAwesome timing,â he replies, grabbing Castielâs waist and manhandling him around until his back is up against some stable-looking shelving. âWeâre gonna play a game, alright?â Deanâs bright green eyes are sparkling and shining and Castiel definitely knows that face. He also knows he should stop him, should tell Dean no to whatever mischievous thing heâs plotting, but it is only minutes to closing time and hell, Castielâs day has been pure, undiluted shit.
âWhat sort of game?â Castiel asks, unable to keep the note of amusement out of his voice as he watches Deanâs eyes dart down to his own lips. Without answering, Dean leans in, kisses Castielâs bottom lip and then his top, pulls back just far enough to look down and slot their groins together in a way that wonât have anyoneâs belts causing unwanted, painful havoc. Then heâs back, tongue poking at the seam of Castielâs mouth, and despite everything, Castiel recognizes that this is Dean asking for permission. If he really doesnât want to do this, in his store or at all, he need only close his mouth.
As much as he appreciates the asking, though, Castiel knew what he was getting into when he stepped inside the storeroom. Dean has a bit of an exhibitionist side, and this isnât their first rodeo in a semi-public space. Though the likelihood of being walked in on is extremely low, thereâs still a bit of a thrill Castiel gets over doing something naughty, and maybe heâs more into it than he lets on. The whole concept has him hardening up nicely and Deanâs grinding isnât hurting either, but just as theyâre setting a pretty nice pace, the first notes of The Song come on.
Growling into Deanâs mouth, Castiel reluctantly pushes him back. âI canât,â he says, frustrated. âI donât want to associate having sex with you with this demonic lullaby.â
Read the rest on AO3:Â https://archiveofourown.org/works/21656614
#destiel#ficlet#christmas#holidays#deancas#my fic#all i want for christmas (are earplugs)#fic rec#castielslostwings
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Locker Room
warnings: smut!! & cursing
requested: nope
I hope you guy enjoy 4k words of gym! shawn!!
A sigh escapes her lips as she fills the water cooler for the third time in the past hour, secretly hoping she won't have to fill it more than the eight times she usually does during her shift. She prefers it over having to pick up the dirty, sweaty towels off the gym floor to throw into the wash, but neither thing is glamorous in her opinion. Her job isn't too bad, she really doesn't have to do much, and Y/n really needs the money. It was either here or the coffee shop on the corner, and she doesn't know a thing about making coffee.
She's been working here for about two weeks, and the worst thing she's had to do is help all the clueless people understand the terms of their membership. She'd rather bang her head against a wall, but most days are relaxing for her when she doesn't have to deal with that. She mostly gets to hide in the background completely unnoticed since everyone seems to know what they're doing and goes about their business like usual.
She gets a nice view sometimes, and one of these days she knows she's going to get caught staring at the cute guys that walk in. She can't help herself, once they take their shirts off she gets a front row seat to their toned abs and back muscles and how could she look away from that? No one really pays much attention to her except to ask for a towel or for her to refill their water bottles though. Every day is basically the same routine, but today's shift was going to be a little different for her.
She makes her way back to the front desk, resting her chin on her fist as she reopens her book to continue reading it. The day has been slow so far, not a lot of people coming in, and it's relatively quiet except for the clinking of weights. She's been waiting, watching the tiny hand tick by on the clock, for her lunch break. While her job may not hard, it's certainly not invigorating and sadly her lunch break is the most exciting part of her day.
When she hears the bell on the door ring, she looks up from her book, letting it close on the counter as she gets ready to give whoever's come in the usual "Hi, welcome to Fusion Gym," greeting, but the words manage to get caught in her throat.
She's unable to do anything but blink, taking in the sight of the stranger that just walked in. She thinks she's dreaming at first as her eyes roam his entire his body, noting the heading that's pushing back chocolate brown curls and shorts that are exposing a pair of thighs that she swears are sinful. Sure she's seen some well fit, attractive looking young guys come in. She works in a gym for goodness sake, but him? He puts all of them to shame.
She jumps out of her chair, smoothing out her shirt and fixing her name tag. She rakes her fingers through hair, trying to make herself look nice or at the very least presentable. She never put much effort into how she looked for her job since she only had to interact with a handful of people and her boss didn't care. But today has made her want to try a bit harder.
He makes his way over to her and is about to say something when Jeremy, the gym's best personal trainer, comes up to him.
"Hey, Shawn. It's been a while since I've seen you, where've you been?" He asks, grabbing him by the hand and pulling him into a type of bro hug. He gives a couple pats on the back before releasing him, one hand still on his shoulder.
Shawn.
She kind of liked that name.
The kind of name she'd like to scream.
"Been busy writing that album and stuff. You know how it is," he tells him, shrugging as he pulls his gym bag off his shoulder. She watches as his biceps flexes, and she restrains herself from biting her lip. A few tattoos on his arm catch her attention, and if she didn't have a thing for them before then she sure did now.
Also, writing an album? Did that make him a singer? She's never heard of any singers named Shawn, but being away at college has really managed to take her out of the loop.
"Yeah, I no worries man. You want to make it a leg day?" Jeremy asks him, and Shawn nods in agreement. Y/n doesn't catch the words that are passed between them next because she's too busy daydreaming about the tall, amber eyed boy in front of her with the a smile like sunshine. Thoughts swirling through her mind about how someone so perfect could exist. Which she realizes is impossible because no one is truly perfect, but damn did he sure come close.
It makes her wish she'd starting working at the gym sooner.
She's fully aware that there's work she needs to do, and standing here gawking at people isn't going to help get it done. It's probably time for her to wipe down equipment or clean one of the bathrooms, but that all seems so insignificant to her right now.
"Hello? Excuse me, miss?"
Gasping, she's pulled back to reality. She blinks a few times, silently cursing at herself for appearing like a fool in front of him. He's standing right in front of her, patiently waiting for her to say something.
"Yes, I'm sorry. Hi, can I help you with something today?"
Like maybe taking off your shirt?
"Yeah, could I get a towel please?"
She nods frantically, like somehow she can no longer behave like a normal human being. She walks back to the closet where they keep the towels and has to stand on her tiptoes to get the only available ones on the top shelf.
"Sorry about that," she says sheepishly when she's back behind the front desk, "Here you go."
She hands him the neatly folded towel, their hands touching when he grabs it from her. A slight chill runs through her, and she has to close her eyes for a minute to calm herself. She doesn't know why she's getting so worked up over a guy. An inconceivably hot guy, but still a guy.
"I appreciate it," he thanks her, his face lighting up with a smile and Y/n's knees go weak at the sight. "I've never seen you here before. I'm Shawn."
He offers her his hand to shake and she takes it, her thumb tracing over the bird that is inked onto it. She ponders over it, considering what it might mean before realizing she hasn't said anything back.
"I..I'm new," she sputters, shaking his hand way too eagerly. He lets out a small laugh, one she'd find endearing if it wasn't caused by the dumb mistake she just made. "I mean, I'm Y/n. Obviously new isn't my name. That would be...that would be stupid...obviously..."
Her focus shifts to anywhere but his own, unable to handle how embarrassing she's being right now. She's word vomiting all over herself, and she'd say that it's the reason no one's ever asked her out. She can hardly say anything remotely intelligible around good looking people so it's no wonder why she can't keep anyone around.
"Cute name for an even cuter girl," he says, winking at her, and her heart almost stops beating.
Was thatâdid he just compliment her? She had to have imagined that right?
"Guess I'll be seeing you around more often," he waves and turns over his shoulder to join Jeremy in the workout room.
She mutters a "guess so" under her breath and jumps giddily where she stands when he's no longer facing her. She wipes her clammy palms against her jeans, trying to get of all the sweat and sits back down in her chair. Opening her book, she tries to get back into it and stop herself from watching Shawn. But it doesn't work once the weights are picked up and the shirt comes off, his entire physique on full display for her.
He could literally choke her with those thighs if he wanted.
After a while, she's still trained on him. Sweat glistens against his chest and forehead, his eyebrows drawn together as he concentrates. For Y/n, this is more entertaining than anything she could see at the movies or on tv. She'd pay to see this everyday, even if the boy never developed any interest in her.
She didn't know it yet, but her luck was about to start changing for her.
ïŸâ§ïœ„ïŸ â§ ïœ„ïŸâ§ ïŸâ§
The low hum of music from the speakers above flows through the gym, a yawn seeping past her lips as she rests her chin further against her fist. She blinks several times, tiredness taking over her body. She's been fighting off sleep for the past three or four hours, trying to stay awake for the night shift she's been stuck on. It was the only time she was available to work this week, having to have mornings and afternoons free for her college midterms. And if she wasn't already occupied enough with all that, it sure didn't help that Shawn has been on her mind the entire time.
It would have been wise to take the whole week, but her desire to see him again was greater than her need to pass her tests. He's started coming in every day since they met, or on nights like tonight if that's when Y/n's working. She didn't know what to think of it really, or of herself for that matter. It wasn't like he was anyone special, if you take away that fact that he's a talented artist and is a walking dream, yet she's developed a crush on him in such a short amount of time. She even took her hair out of a ponytail for him, letting it fall loosely around her face and over her shoulders. She would've brushed it, but she didn't want it to seem like she was trying too hard.
Not that it mattered because Shawn definitely noticed her. He noticed her from the moment he laid eyes on her, even if she was about to fall out of her chair. It was adorable, and what's more adorable is the amount of times he's caught her staring at him while he's in the middle of working out. He'd be lying if he said he didn't love the way he's able to put on a show for her. It's an immediate confidence booster for him when she gets flustered, turning back to the towels she folding or book she's only half reading. And when she's busy and needed elsewhere, he's watching her too.
Slowly, they've both been noticing that the only attention they want is each other's. There have been plenty of girls in the gym that have taken their shot at flirting with Shawnâthere being one in particular that Y/n remembers named Olivia. She works at the gym alongside her, and she had to watch the pathetic scene unfold in front of her while refraining herself from killing the girl. Everything from shoulder touching, hair twirling, and all the way to fake laughing. She thought she was going to be sick, but luckily Shawn wasn't paying any mind to her. He's used to the affection, but now he only wants Y/n's.
She releases a grunt when her head slips from her hand, hitting her forehead on the counter. Her fingers tend to the pain, rubbing tenderly to help ease it before she decides to clean the equipment in order to keep herself from nearly falling asleep again. If there's anything she's learned from this night, it's that four cups of coffee fails to do the trick.
Right now there's two things she'd love: either a nap or to be underneath Shawn while he's doing push ups in the workout room with Jeremy...or for other reasons. The way his muscles are flexing is making her hot, and the a/c in this place is always cranked up on full blast.
"How many is that?" Shawn asks, grunting as he pushes himself up from the mat. A bead of sweat slides down the side of his head, his damp curls sticking to his neck.
"That's thirty," Jeremy answers, smacking on a piece of gum. His gaze wanders the room, stopping when he sees Y/n wiping down a weight bench. "Hey, Y/n. I'm going to go fill up my water. Make sure he doesn't stop while I'm gone, would ya?"
He doesn't wait for a response, already making his way towards the water cooler. She glances at Shawn who relaxes before he stands up. The air is thick around them as he moves to stand in front of her, bringing his hand up to brush a piece of hair behind her ear. Skin tingles where he touches her, feeling electric as it runs down her spine.
She'd love for him to touch her all over.
She'd love to get to touch him all over. And his shirt's already off, making him half naked...
"You're not really going to make me do any more are you? I think I deserve a break don't you?" He asks, quirking a brow and cocking his head.
She draws in a weary breath, unsure of what to say as she grabs his hand and pulls it away from where it hovers above her cheek. She holds onto it, looking at where their hands meet and letting a second pass before she snaps herself out of whatever trance she's in.
"I...I guess?" She says questioningly.
He shakes his head. "You know what? What if you helped me instead?"
Her brows knit together, confusion gracing her features. "What do you mean?"
There's no one around except for the two of them and one or two other employees, most people having called it a night ages ago. The room is calm and quiet with it only being the two of you. That's why Shawn doesn't have a problem pulling her down gently to the mat, climbing above her and positioning himself to do more push-ups. Fear ignites behind her eyes as her back presses against it, their chests all but touching. He grasps her chin, getting her to look at him.
"For every push-up I do right I'll kiss you," he explains, and he has no idea where any of this came from but he's glad it did. He has wanted to ask her out over the past week. He's wanted to ask her out from the minute he saw her behind the front desk, but he's chickened out every time he's considered going for it.
"Wait what?"
She's hoping Jeremy doesn't come back anytime soon, not finding this situation to be one she'd enjoy explaining her way out of.
"Think of it as a reward," he persuades her, pushing himself down so his lips ghost right over her ear, "For both of us."
His locks dangle over his lashes, tickling along the side of her neck. She resists the urge twirl a curl of it around her finger. She's wondered what it feels like. Probably
"But how will I know if you do one right?" She whispers.
"I guess that's up to me to decide," he breathes, already bending down to start. His warm breath fans across her face, his nose lightly brushing hers. Her body is suddenly begging for him to kiss her, anticipating him pressing his warm lips to hers. Her head swirls and eyes flutter shut.
He's about to steal one from her. Claim the reward that's well earned for both of them, but she puts a stop to it.
"You know, I like your songs," she blurts out, dissipating the moment. She sucks her bottom lip between her teeth, angry that she just ruined things as the heat was turning up. Her words come out so rushed she's hoping he didn't understand a thing she saidâshe's not even sure she understood what she said.
"What?"
"I like your songs," she repeats, more clearly this time. "I looked you up on Spotify the other night and I think your songs are...are cool."
'I looked you up on Spotify?' 'I think your songs are cool?'. Seriously? She listened to all three of his albums and that's what she has to say about it? That's the best she could come up with? It's better than telling him she spent over two hours listening to his music instead of studying for her classes, but still.
"Oh, thanks," he says, and there he goes again with that lovable laugh that has no business making her like him so much. "Do you have a favorite?"
She shrugs, chewing on the inside of her cheek. "I guess I really enjoyed that one song...Nervous I think it was...?"
A deep shade of crimson blossoms over Shawn's cheeks, and he coughs before shaking it off. His embarrassment begins to falter, and she notices a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
"Is it because I make you nervous, princess?"
She freezes, her pulse racing.
Princess?
That was new. She's never been called that before, but she liked hearing it come from that mouth of his. Now she wants to know what else it can do. Kiss her lips? Or maybe the ones a little further south?
She's so lost in her mind that she's totally surprised when he finally decides to go for it. Next thing she knows his lips are on hers, moving gently. It's fervent, it's insiste. Each one deeper than the last every time he pulls away and comes back. He relaxes, his body melting into hers as she winds her arms around him. They're flush against each other now with no room to consider the possibility of someone walking in on them now.
One hand tangles in her hair, the other pinches her hip causing her to squirm and her mouth to part. Her heart beats faster and faster, body spinning as she savors the saccharin taste of honey. They're making out for the entire world to seeâthey're lying in front of a wall of windowsâbut that's the last thing either of them care about. The world has fallen around them, and the only thing left are the helpless moans they're pulling out of each other.
She tugs teasingly at his bottom lip, hissing when he grinds his hips against her own. A hand slips under her shirt, splaying over her stomach, but before he can move it any further something halts his actions.
A bottle drops to the floor, the sound of it ringing through the room alongside a string of curses. Shawn swiftly rolls off of her, the two of them sitting up as Jeremy approaches. Realizing their messy appearance, he peers unsurely at them.
He clears his throat. "Ahem, I think we should call it a night," he says, fixated on the way they're so close to one another, "It's getting late, yeah?"
Shawn nods, already halfway stood up. "Yeah, I'm gonna hit the showers."
They exchange goodbyes while Y/n drowns in a sea disbelief. Never in a million years would she have pictured herself making out with a pop star on a grime infested floor. Granted she didn't initiate it, but she made no effort to stop the situation either.
Jeremy's long gone and she chooses to follow Shawn's lead by standing up as well, but when she does she trips. He's quick to catch her as she stumbles into his chest, and he gestures towards the lockers rooms. There's a split second of misunderstanding before she picks up that he wants her to join him, which sends her into a minor panic.
Is he really going to try and hook up with her in a locker room?
Is she really finding herself okay with that?
Could he at least buy her dinner first?
Within no time they're in there and he's all over her again. Dropping his bag and towel, gripping her waist and attaching himself to her neck once more. It's no surprise he's strong, and it's no surprise that a wave of excitement rushes through her when he roughly pushes her back into the side of the lockers. He skims the hem of her shirt, working to pull it off of her.
Her pants are next, and then his own shorts. She's desperate for him when she feels his hard on poking the side of her thigh, mere inches away from leaning into the place she wants him most. Whines fill the air as they leave red and purple marks along skin. Shawn dips down, his mouth roaming her chest while his arm snakes around to work on the clasp of her bra.
He groans, taking in the beautiful sight of her. "I like this view," he says, "I could get used to this."
She can't believe how she's gotten here. Naked and sandwiched between Shawn and the cold metal of a row of lockers. She can't believe it when his mouth leaves her collarbone and attacks her nipple, his fingers fumbling around with the other. She can't believe the way she's shuddering when he carefully drops down to his knees. He leaves sloppy kisses on her on his way down, making her want to crumble.
There's a tingling feeling where she's aching for him when he levels with her center. She's wet. Beyond wet, and he's barely done anything to her yet. He's positioned himself between her thighs, his thumbs rubbing gentle circles into them, and she wants to come undone at the sight of it alone.
Her body lurches forward when his nose nudges her clit. She becomes a whimpering mess when his fingers dance along her thighs and make their way up to her heat. They slide through her wet folds, circling her entrance before slipping one in. His tongue is on her next, eliciting a scream from her as it swirls her clit.
Groans leave him as he sucks on her bundle of nerves, causing vibrations that make her tremble. Her legs shake, and she's already beginning to drip all over his chin.
"Fuck," she whines, loving the way he's stretching her more and more with each pump.
He pulls away, muttering a "you taste so fucking good," beneath his breath, eyes glossed over with lust, before burying himself in her again. He's relentless, pushing deep inside her all the way to his knuckles and picking up his pace to bring her closer and closer to the edge. Her back arches into him, and she moans at the way he's touching every place inside her. Licking, lapping, suckingâevery movement, everything more magical than the last.
He continues to mercilessly eat her out, floating from how her pussy tastes. Soft cries can be heard as she's on the brink of release. She's in awe at how goddamn amazing he is at this. There's no way he hasn't done this before, but she doesn't care because she didn't know someone could make her feel this good. Her head leans back on the lockers, her eyes hooded as she watches herself spill all over his chin.
"Such a pretty princess when you're about to cum for me," he mumbles, moving faster to finish her off. And the way he says 'for him' does things to her. She's not just cumming, she's coming for him. And he's making her.
Her hands slam to the lockers to keep her steady.
"Right there. Please right there," she begs as he brings her to her hilt. Her orgasm starts to wash over her, unraveling right in front of him. He marvels in it, refusing to slow down or let up as she succumbs to pure bliss.
He licks every drop of her, cleaning her up as she writhes. He's never been so satisfied from making a girl cum with only his mouth. He's never been more confident in his abilities, and he'll be the first to admit he wants to do it again. He plants one last kiss to her clit, listening to the way she giggles as he stands back up.
He presses another one to her lips to allow for her to taste her sweet self on him. "How was that?"
"You," she breathes, "were amazing."
Thanks for reading! Feedback is appreciated!! Please like and reblog if you enjoyed! :) xx
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đ· Sweet Wine đ·
Master List   Pt. 1
ââWarning: Death/ funerals/ Goreââ
Word count: 3143
Characters: 15440
People: Adam x Y/N x Eve
Made for: @ladyfluff
Tag: @ladyfluff @may-bereblog @jaquellejohnson @mousee555 @littlefrogstuff
Request:No
Date:4/8/19
Summary:
This is may be the end but itâs the beginning of forever
A/N: And this ladies and gents is the ending. Since it was so long I made my final part 2 for such an amazing first serious. I really do hope that more people come in and or stay with me in the long run. I loved this and it was the fist FF that I ended so it really does mean a lot to me from your comments and re-blogs and hearts. Thank you. After this I will be taking requests so donât be shy and feel free to ask. Even if itâs smut.- xoxo Mellow
Y/N P.O.V
As I looked all around Adamâs office I smiled thinking of the many ways that he met all of his so called heros. Well I guess they are rather, heroes of literature, art, and music. Saving lives one at a time with just their talent and a love for it. Down stairs I could hear Adam play his violin and other many instruments. He had been down ever since Eve moved back to Tangier. We were oth sad when she left of course, but understood. Everything was fine now and she still had her home to take care of. I can still see his face when she left. Sad and a little heartbroken. more than he usually was. It was my tun to take care of him and make sure that he wasnât in his head all the time. I thought that while I was up here I might as well do some snooping. I figured that he wouldnât mind since it was me..right?
Looking down to his desk I went to go and open his drawer. To my surprise it was open and not locked. He must have unlocked it once Ava left. Adam was forever a secret, even to me and Eve he was always like a book filled with blank pages that needed a special light to see what was written down in it. But that said light was locked away in a volt down in the ocean. So as annoying as it sounds it was just as annoying trying to talk him out of getting more into the real world. I would take him out with me at night just on some midnight snack runs. It was babysits and for that I was proud of him but I needed to know what he might like so that I can show him that the world may be bad but itâs a lot worse when your the only one sulking in the thought of the world being so barren and dark. So looking through his many journals and books to me was a mandatory. If I wanted him to look forward to the future then I might as well give him a little push in the right direction then let him do the rest.
I skimmed through the pages taking down some notes in a blank notebook that sat on top of the desk and was quick to write them all down just incase he decided to come up and see what kept me. Even through the past week I was reading some of the books he had and listening to the music he favored. He had no reason to wonder what I was doing and I guess thought that It was just my way of connecting with him more. In a way it was but it won't my only reason. Icumbled the notes i took down and placed them on the inside of the leather jacket Adam gave me. Heading down the stairs and grabbing my bag for when I would sleepover. Smiling at him and giving him a kiss on the cheek as I stood ready to go home for the night.
With this he didnât look to pleased as usual but I cocked my eyebrow to let him know that I just wasn't in the mood for his âbut you can stay with me talkâ. I had work in the morning and needed to rest in the house that I PAYED FOR. Thankfully he stayed quiet all except for a loud grunt while getting up and getting his keys and glasses. Was he never too cool?
As we drove down the road I looked to him and smiled. Probably sensing my stair he looked back at me for a moment before looking back to the road.
âWhat?â
âYour cute face.â
He chuckled
âIâm everything but cute. Now you~ on the other hand you're adorable.â
âYeah you're a grouch.â
âIs that so?â
âMhm.â
Another chuckle escaped his lips before silence filled the air again. He rolled down the windows a bit since the car did feel a bit warm with the summer weather approaching. He looked so beautiful with the many streetlights that passed by him. Forever beautiful..forever..
It never occured to me until now that I wouldnât have that with him, or Eve..What the fuck do I do now? They had technically had just gotten me back and soon another version of me would be taking the spot that I was in. The thought hurt me, of them having to start all over again with someone new that might not even love them back. How long would they have to wait? Would they even work out? Would they be beautiful? More than me? No..I have given a Love to them that I know cannot be replaced. The old me was the same way. She was irreplaceable and wonât ever come back again. Now itâs my turn to feel the love that was stolen from her. To feel the love that I deserve. The thing was as I began to think about this Adam started to hum a tune that he loved. The radio was on was was the only light in the car that worked. This! I never wanted this to end. The small moments like these are ones that are highly monday and for everyone else could be easily forgotten but not for me. These moments are mine. Adam and Eve are mine! How in the hell am I gonna keep them? Maybe-
âAlright dove, like you asked. Home.â
âWha?â
âWe're here. Whatâs wrong you donât wanna leave now?â
âAh no itâs not that itâs just. I wanna..never mind goodnight.â
âY/N, hey wait!â
I heard him calling out my name but I didnât pay him any mind. I was quick to walk into my apartment and get upstairs. Face planting down on my bed face first I screamed into my pillow. Few minutes went by of me sobbing into my pillow about things I couldnât change and my phone went off. I wiped my face to look at the screen and I saw that It was Adam saying âIâm sorry that I made a fuss about you staying, didnât mean to make you feel so channed to me I really didn't.â The message continued but I couldnât bring myself to read what I had done to my poor lover who didn't know what the fuck was going on in my own head! Great! Just fucking fantastic! Not only did I fuck up on trying to get Adam to open up his mind but I made him think that I was shutting him out! I sobbed a little bit more before going to sleep, crying.
That night I had a dream of a huge church and a few of my friends and long lost relatives sitting down in all black. They sat like stachues as roses both white and red scattered on tip of the black slick casket. The pastor of the church patted my shoulder and lead me up to it. Opening it I saw that there was nothing inside, when I turned to look back at the man all their was that looked back at me were eyes of black. My view shifted as He stood over my body lying in the casket. I wanted to scream but couldnât for some odd reason. My voice stayed stuck in my lungs as he closed it. I felt as though I was falling with no end. With a loud thud I stopped and silence filled the air once more. A little glimmer of light shown in my carddle of death and i got to look at my hands to see that my skin was rotting like some type of dead animals. My nails turning black as I felt my face starting to just fall off as I tried to reach for the pieces of flesh that kept falling off. Only to no avail. The way I smelled was nothing of kindness either. The smell was like a never opened and festering can of shit and piss.
âBut she was so beautiful.â
âSheâll be reborn again my starman.â
âBut we loved her.â
âAdam?!! EVE?!! IâM NOT GONE!!! WAIT! PLEASE HELP ME!! PLEASEE! I DONâT WANNA DIE!!! PLEASE!!!â
âI know love. Come on.â
I kept on screaming and banging on the coffin head above me as I bugs come crawling into the cracks of the hell room I had been put in. Feasting on my dead flesh and getting into the crevices of the rotten holes that filled my body. Pounding and pounding hard onto the walls of the room I was buried in I heard the dirt splash upon the top of the coffin and make whatever light there was become dim to down me into the deepest and darkest sea of the unknown and unkind darkness. Still I screamed and begged and called out for help until I was finally woken by my next door neighbor who shook me awake. I had never been so happy to see- Sarrah..
Not really getting all that much of a good look on her I realized that she looked just like Sarah!
âHey, itâs okay! Everything is alright! My god you must have been having the worst dream possible if you could destroy your wall like that.â
I was horrified when I looked to my left to see that in fact I punched two indents into my wall that would now have to be replaced. This was the straw that broke my back and I just started out of nowhere balling. I really wanted to be able to get my deposit for the apartment and now that was gone! Then the dream and the reality of the dream were just too much. My neighbor whose name was Lily comforted me rubbing her hand against my back.
âJesus love you really must be going through it. What happened? Did that weirdo from last night hurt you?!!! Tell me Y/N-â
I let it slip outâŠ
âSarrah just stop you wouldn't understand!..I..I um I mean..â
â..How the fuck did you know? Who told you..No your just messing with me Y/N stop playing around like that! Iâm serious now Y/N who in the bloody fuck her you?!â
âAdam and Eve..Sarrah..that night I got shot..you were in the room with me. What the fuck happened to you?â
Her face became the word shocked. Her eyes were As wide as the moon and her lips quivered as though she were about to cry, hell she was after a tear fell smoothly down her face and under her chin. She took her hands into mine and I noticed that they were just as dead cold as Adam and Eveâs. Putting my hand to her cheek she started crying instead of me and hugged me tighter than tight. I squealed so that she would let go of me a bit and she understood. Being so excited she pulled me to my feet and started jumping up and down screaming that I had finally remembered. I covered her mouth and sat down with her on my bed and talked with her for a bit. The clock next to my ed side said 5 AM so I only had a few more hours before I had to get ready for work. I talked with her about what happened and she did the same. Her and Bartholomew got married and are traveling one year at a time. She talked about how and where they planned on settling down forever.
âMan..so you have fragments of her memories but your not her at all?â
âWell I canât say at all because, then I wouldnât even know anything So I guess i'm similar just not really. Weâre still different people period.â
âI see, well now that youâve found them. Are you?â
âAm I what?â
âGonna change. Like how I did?â
â...Well. Yes, I think I-â
âNo, now see thatâs where youâve already fucked up on. You have got to know whether your willing to give this all up or not. This is no joke Y/N this is serious. Blood is running low nowadays and there's more and more of us dying off as we speak. You have to be ready to take this life..If not then..Well I donât know.â
âTeach me.â
âWhat?â
âTell me what itâs like to become this, a vampire! Just only for a few weeks, then iâll decide whether or not I wanna go through with this. PLease Sarrah!! I need to know if this is as serious as you say it is. I want Adam and Eve forever this time.Me and only me not pass me not that girl way back, me.â
Sarah nodded her head in agreement and with a smile she stared right into my eyes.
âOkay, but you have to ask them to change you.â
Within those many months I was living a double life with keeping the secret from Adam and Eve about what I was learning and how I found Sarrah and her lover again. I learned about a lot of basic thing that really wasn't that hard to understand. The reason why it took her so long too was the fact that Sarrah and her husband were always out somewhere in the night and or moonlight having the time of their lives being young forever. When she told me that I Had finally learned everything that I needed to know I felt ready too. This was it, my future that I would be going into. A new season and form that a new me then the one I look at in the mirror. Well internal rather. Getting up and waiting for Adam to come and pick me up I got dressed in something that was a bit more special. Putting on ripped stripped sweater and a long skirt with my favorite and only ankle boots I put my hair in a half bun with the rest of my hair hanging down. I tried to make myself look as cute as possible but also casual so Adam wouldn't get susice. He was a man of detail at times so he knew when something was up. I heard the horn of his car and took a deep breath before leaving my final letter to my old friends and whoever cared about my existence..Today was the day in my mind. It would start here..I left my phone, my clothes, and every single picture that I had took with me and my parents. Sarrah Said that she would vouch for me and that she would tell the landlord what fake story we came up with. Only taking my favorite stuffed animal with me and my camera. I left it all. And left the key on top of the mat and my credit card and the rest of the money I had left on the kitchen island inside..It felt so surreal, But invigorating! Exciting! Only few had ever done this and I was actually happy to say that I was one of them.
For reasons of Love..not selfish desire..just love
Walking into the house of the old victorian,I was scooped up out of nowhere by a pair of pale white and thin arms that were surprisingly strong. I didn't fight since I could already know who it was from just the sent of her coat. Hugging her back like as though I was gonna lose her, I relished in the sent of my Eve. Back in my arms, same and in one whole piece.
âI missed you sweet dove.â
âI missed you more.â
Letting each other go we saw Adam go past us slightly smiling. Going into the living room/ sound room to plop down on the couch. He was happy. I reached up to kiss Eveâs soft lips as she held onto my waist swaying with me.
âWhen did you get here?â
âLast night. But Adam told me that you were too tired to come over so he didnât pick you up.â
âBut I would have had the energy of a thousand cheetahs if  it was you who I got to see.â
âHey, what am I? Chopped liver?â
âBest can of that shit that I've ever seen. I donât even know how in the hell zombies stomached those things.â
âDonât look at me, I have no clue either.â
We got to catch up while snuggling on the couch and I felt it was the right time for me to ask the big question.No more small talking or backing out now. Once I left the key to my apartment I also left my buildingâs key with Sarah as her and her hubby were out of town. So their was really no going back now.
âI wanna change..permanently. I want to become like you both.â
The room fell silent with no more laughter, or even barely breathing. Surely not from me either. I looked to both of them and their faces were the same. âWhat the fuck did she just say?â Their reaction would have made me laugh at any other time but I knew that if I started laughing they would think itâs a joke. Adam for the first time in forever had a smile from ear to ear. As his fangs were out and without an ounce of fear or anything it seemed in his mind. He was completely all for it until Eve slapped his shoulder and raised her eyebrows.
âEve I know what Iâm getting myself into! I met with Sarrah and-â
âSarrah!!? How in the hell is she still alive?!!â
âPlease just let me finish!..My greatest fear for these past few months has been the fact that at some point and at some time I could be taken away again. At least this version of me. And if we really are about change and you both getting to know the new me? I find there no other way then to change me. I love you both and understand the consequences but I just canât think of anyone else, with you both. Your mine and iâm yours right?..Right?!!â
Eve just looked at Adam and he sighed putting away his fangs.
âStay here. We need to converse alone about this too.â
âOkay?..â
As they got up I stayed still down stairs. Please, please say yes..Please. I love youâŠ
#Olla#adam olla#OLLA Adam#eve olla#OLLA Eve#only lovers left alive#adam x reader#eve x reader#eve x reader x adam#adam x reader x eve#vampire#Vampiers#love#romantic fantasy#fantasy#fanfic#romance#polyamourous#tom hiddleston#tilda swinton
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Updated rules
I updated my rules, hereâs the link:Â https://hannahhostofheaven.tumblr.com/rules
They are mostly the same with just a few updates. You need to have read my rules before we RP:
* I will follow you as my MUN blog with is @Hannah-deserved-better
* My OTP is always Hannah/Castiel so keep that in mind. My Hannah will always have a thing for Castiel. I am opened to RPing with other blogs but there probably wonât be any romance.
* I am open to poly pairings so if you want to do something with Castiel, Hannah, and someone else, Iâm okay with that as long as itâs not Destiel or Wincest. I donât ship either of those. I am open to Sastiel plus Hannah, Megstiel plus Hannah, OCs, whatever. But it needs to have chemistry.
* Note that I am a demisexual and bisexual person and as such, so is Hannah. Demisexual means I donât just jump into sexual relationships without there being an emotional and mental relationship first.
* not interested in RPing with anyone who views angels as brothers and sisters cuz as I said, I ship Castiel/Hannah so our views will not be compatible.
* I play Hannah using Erica Carroll as a face claim.
* Caroline Johnson is available to RP with upon request.
* No god modding or making my character act without me. Donât anticipate or assume what my character is going to do, I retain complete control of her. Also, no time jumps without discussing it first.
* Donât nag me for a reply. I am very busy and real life comes first, I will try to reply when I can, and if I need another long break Iâll let you know.
* discuss plot with me. I am a plot driven writer and I like to plan things out. I am open to pretty much everything but I like mulling things over.
* Itâs my belief that Hannah would be on the autism spectrum if she were human so any Human Hannah AUs will be like that.
* MUN is autistic.
* female vessel Castiel blogs are welcome.
* I play Hannah in character as I see her in the show. How she reacts to things doesnât necessarily reflect the MUNâs personal views. Hannah is passionate for an angel but she is very stuck on her idea of angel code, law, and justice. The internal conflict can sometimes make her doubt herself and often makes her a bit of a contradiction. When her angel code says one thing and her feelings say another, she can have conflict. She is also impulsive and quick to anger. I am always trying to better my performance of her, but she certainly has a lot of strengths and a lot of flaws and you can expect me to play her that way. If she gets mad at your character donât take it to mean it has anything to do with the MUN, I am just channeling Hannah.
* I donât like just jumping into a relationship. I like to establish things first. It canât be forced. Sometimes our muses get together very fast, sometimes there is angry hate sex first before there is love, sometimes itâs a slow burn, but we definitely have to go at the same speed. I never want to just start writing a situation where our muses are just automatically in a relationship from the beginning.
** ** Iâve eased up on my stance regarding smut lately, but I still tend to be kind of fickle about it, I have to be in the mood for it, so please check first. I am always okay with mild sex scenes and abstract sex scenes where we keep to metaphors and such, and I am not really into hardcore stuff. I reserve the right to fade to black if Iâm not feeling it. Also, I do not write porn. My roleplays are plot centered adventures that can INCLUDE sex but nor REVOLVE AROUND sex.
* Also, on that note, if we are writing and I sense that a sex scene might be coming up, Iâll probably PM you (or you PM me) so we can be sure we are both on the same page.
* no child OCs.
* I like angsty, dark themes, hurt/comfort type plots. I really donât have any known triggers, but check with me first. I am okay with torture and with plots involving rape, though not with children. Also note on rape: I will not RP graphic scenes of rape, I will always fade to black, no exceptions. Also Hannah will not be in any kind of relationship with your character if they are the ones doing the abuse.
* I donât do the whole ABO alpha omega thing. I donât understand how it works at all and itâs really just not my thing.
* My stories tend to be heavy on Supernatural lore so if you arenât familiar with the show, I suggest checking out the Supernatural Wiki. I utilize it quite a bit myself: http://supernatural.wikia.com/wiki/Supernatural
* Iâm not really into working outside the Supernatural verse, though sometimes I might be okay with crossing over with related verses such as Buffy the Vampire slayer, but I won't want to work in a verse that I personally donât know about (and I donât watch a lot of TV so I am not part of many fandoms) so when in doubt, stick with Supernatural.
* We need to establish which season we are working with. If we donât, I will assume that we are working with the most current season, in which case, I will default to the idea that Hannah has been dead since season 11, when she was killed by the angel Efram, when she was in her male vessel, and she died trying to defend Castiel, and was somehow brought back to life.
* Please try to play in character and with canon in mind. We will definitely be breaking with canon, but it needs to always be a guideline.
* Â Mun is over 30. Mun is also married and has a job so the demands on my time can be formidable. Mun is in California so we are dealing with Pacific Standard Time.
* Supernatural deals with angels and demons and a lot of religious lore. I tend to stick closely to canon when it comes to lore and things like that, so if you are religious its probably best not to get offended by things like Lucifer and such because itâs just a show. I personally donât come from a religious background, though my husband, who is very well versed in Judeo-Christian mystics, helps me in those areas of the show. I also happen to hold a degree in history and am pretty knowledgeable in anthropology, mythology, and world religions. That being said, I suggest we keep to the guidelines and criteria dictated by the show, not the bible.
* I am relatively new to Tumblr roleplays so I am not completely fluent in the lingo and such. I donât know how to do icon threads and I donât know what discord or anything like that is so we should stick with thread style format. Although I do like to insert pictures and gifs into my posts once in a while.
Headcanons:
* Hannah is an angelâs angel, she lives by her rules, but she finds inner conflict with her feelings. She believes in law, justice, and order.
* She is a unique angel in that she has emotions. This makes her more intuitive than other angels. She is quite passionate and although she doesnât always understand emotions, she just knows she has them. She has a temper, especially when someone taunts her or Castiel.
* Hannah has a fascination with Humanity, although she holds and maintains a distance with these creatures she doesnât quite understand. She tends to find âhuman thingsâ like eating unsettling and disgusting, at first, but she is open-minded and when given enough encouragement, she will try new things.
* Hannah likes plants and plant life. She has an aversion to things like fences, borders, and barriers. Some things she retained from Caroline was being a bit of a daydreamer, animal lover, and an adventurous world traveler. In RPGs were Caroline was able to have a career, she always pursued something in travel and tourism, or in anthropology.
* In this headcanon, Hannah has given up her vesselâs soul who has gone to heaven, leaving Hannah her body. But she still recalls certain events from Carolineâs life, like living in Montana. Her favorite animals are horses, dogs, and tigers.
* In this headcanon, Caroline and her husband were not on the best of terms. Depending on RPG, Joe can be seen as neglectful at best, abusive at worst, and there was a reason why Caroline said Yes to Hannah in the first place. This may or may not contradict canon, depending on your interpretations of it.
* I think Hannah has cream colored wings with golden yellow tips, see blog banner picture.
* Hannah is considered a relatively young angel. She is perhaps 5-10 million years old which when compared to the archangels which are perhaps billions of years old,is very young. She is older than humanity but wasnât around to see dinosaurs.
* Caroline Johnson was born February 25th, 1980 in Great Falls, Montana. She is a Pisces.
* Hannah has had limited dealings with humans but she does have a certain bond with Caroline Johnson.
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11/11/11
@chloehl10 @ham-palpert @reminiscingintherainâ @realitybetterthanfictionâ and @laynefaireâ tagged me in this. Thanks yâall! Iâm sorry Iâm such a slack ass and itâs been weeeeeeks since I drafted this half finished, soooooooooo....
 Iâm going to combine and put everything under a cut.
The first 11 are from @chloehl10
1. Whatâs your favourite fic youâve ever written, and why?
Donât Want Shelter because itâs the first fic I put emotional effort into. That universe, that Harry and Louis, all of it are very vivid and alive in my head. I love them.
2. Pick three words that you think describe your works overall.
Long ass sentences đ
3. How long does it take you to write a fic?
Depends. Writing doesnât usually take me long but editing does.
4. Whatâs the hardest thing about writing?
Realizing that Iâm probably never going to write some of the ideas I have
5. Do you listen to music or anything while you write? Whatâs normal for you when you write?
I donât usually, but sometimes. Idk that I have a normal. I really prefer to be alone and quiet.
6. How do you come up with titles for your fics?
Songs usually. Sometimes they just come to me though.
7. Whatâs one piece of advice youâd give to a new writer?
Get a beta. But not just a beta. Get someone who can talk fic/plot/story with you as well.
8. How important do you think tags are when you are publishing a fic?
Very in some ways, no at all in others. I tag mainly for readers so they know enough about the fic to decide whether or not to read. I donât tag specific sex stuff usually though every now and then Iâll throw in âanal fingeringâ just to mix it up. I donât tag who tops/bottoms. I do tag with fic reccers in mind thanks to Bâs @nottooldforthisship instructions!
9. Do you write for fests/exchanges? If so, do you enjoy them? If not, why not?!
I have and I do but not often. I like running them and I have done exchanges in the past but itâs not really my thing to write for them. Is that weird? I feel like it is but ehhh
10. Which work of yours are you most proud of and why?
An Unbalanced Force aka marold harold because.... idk
11. Whatâs next for you?
Currently working on a short pwp hiccup fic
These 11 are from @ham-palpert
1. Have you ever been burned by a WIP that never updated? If so, describe that traumatic experience.
I have not! But more in a ehhhh Iâm not too bothered way. Iâve definitely read WIPs that werenât completed but idk I guess I love on quickly lol
2. Speaking of WIPs, do you like writing (or reading) them? Why or why not?
I donât write them. As in even my fics that have been posted as WIPs (DWS and HFL) weâre completely finished aside from some editing before I started posting. I change too much when I write. That padlock in TSHU? Thought of it at the end and went back to add it to the beginning.
I will sometimes read a WIP but not often. Mainly because I donât remember anything between updates
3. Are you a dialogue person? An inner-monologue person? A heavily descriptive scene-setter? Â
I think Iâm gonna pass? I literally have no idea. I donât think I heavily describe scenes but I guess that depends on the scene? This is when I send for help and ask Nic
4. Is there a scene from a fic youâve read that you wished youâd written/thought of first?
Not really
5. Would you rather read a 150k angsty fic, or a 10k fluffy one-shot?
10k one shot
6. Do you enjoy writing smut scenes? Does it make you feel super awkward? Do you need to have a cigarette afterwards?
Sometimes smut scenes are fun to write. Especially if thereâs something different about it. Sometimes I have to be in the mood. Sometimes I feel like I need to shower after lolll
7. Do you click through the recently updated list on AO3 or read exclusively fic recs? Or a bit of both? Â
Neither. I donât read nearly as much as I used to. Iâm nowhere near caught up on Big Bang.
8. How many words, on average, do you write a week? Do you try to stick to writing goals? Â
Oh wow. Idk! I could actually figure it out since I track my words per day. When Iâm steadily writing, Iâd say 10k a week is average? Probably more tbh
9. Are you someone who comments on the fics you read (and liked)?
Yes
10. Of all the fics youâve written, which one came to you the easiest?
marold harold I think
11. If you had to live in one of the AUs you created, which one would it be?
Marold harold and Iâd be Kate McKinnon
these 11 are from @reminiscingintherainâÂ
1. Has your writing changed now from the way it was when you started? If so, how?Â
yeah definitely. more plot heavy and just better overall
2. Does anyone IRL know about your writing? If so, have they read it?Â
yes, but no oneâs read any of it. i almost sent tshu to my therapist lol
3. Is there anything youâve written that you wish you hadnât?Â
no
4. Do you have a set location or setting that you have to write in? A favourite cafe? The only seat thatâs comfortable?
no, i will write literally anywhere. on my phone or laptop. i like writing on my back porch when itâs not a million degrees outsideÂ
5. What are you working on? If you can (i.e., itâs not on anon!), share five lines!
5 lines from the hiccup fic:Â
When he opens his mouth to answer, Louis hiccups and flattens his hand against his chest, shaking his head. He points to his mouth, hiccups again, then again, snaps his mouth shut and pushes past Harry, who turns and follows him out of the club to the relative quiet of the street.
âYou can stay, Harry.â Louis shoves his hands in the pockets of his faded jeans and turns to glance at Harry, whoâs walking beside him. He hiccups and groans, kicking his foot out and stomping. âFuck me, man. This sucks.â
6. Have you ever written something for a fic, but ended up removing a whole scene in its entirety and using it for something else?
i think so but tbh i canât remember lol
7. Are you a linear writer? Or can you write scenes out of order and put them together at the end?
iâm a linear writer, but i will skip over parts of a scene like....... iâll write a bunch of dialogue with nothing around it and fill in later
8. Betas/Britpickers⊠opinions?
always always always. i would literally not write if i couldnât have a beta lol
9. How much do/can you write on average at any given time?
huh idk. iâm a fast writer, but iâd say like probably 1.5k a day is average for me?
10. How organised are you? Do you have lists and/or spreadsheets, or do you just wing it?
iâm the worst lol i tried to organize my google docs and that lasted like a week
11. What made you start writing?Â
i was bored and i thought hmmmm wonder if i could write a fic. turns out i could!
alrighty these 11 are from layne :D
1. What is your favorite trope to write? To read?
EXES/ENEMIES TO LOVERS
2. What other fandoms do you write in/have you written in?
not a one
3. Whatâs one fic idea you want to read, but would never write?
i honestly donât know because i write what i want to read
4. When do you do most of your writing - morning, afternoon, night? Which time of day do you find most productive?
i think iâm most productive in the morning, but i write when i find the time
5. Writing routine? What do you drink? Do you have a go to snack?
i donât have a routine. i usually drink water or coffee, but occasionally vodka, wine, or beer. i donât snack while i write but now i want to
6. Have you ever been writing something and had to get up and walk away from it? What was it and why did you have to step away?
i had to walk away from tshu because it was stressing me out that i couldnât invent time travel irl so i wrote heading for limbo for a few weeks and went back to it lol
7. What is your most favorite scene youâve ever written?
oooooooooooooooooooooh oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh this is such a good question and i hate it lol i absolutely HATE picking favorites of anything but iâll say that the scene from tshu when louis shows zayn his tattoo and everything right before and after that
8. Â Have you ever had an ending to a story, but couldnât figure out how to start it? I donât mean the typical -And they lived happily ever after - but a fully fleshed out ending with your usual writing pair, but you had no idea where to start? Did you ever write it?
nooooooope
9. What is the oddest thing youâve ever drawn inspiration from? Â
idk i think being stuck in a hurricane with no power turning into donât want shelter was pretty odd
10. Youâve accepted a prompt to write a fic using a Whitesnake song for the title. Which song do you choose, and what is your ficâs summary?
here i go again - 70s trucker au (iâm not summarizing because iâm actually planning to write this one, though the title with be different. probably.)
11. Your most recent fic is being made into a movie. What would you change your main charactersâ names to and who would you fancast to play them?
ok so iâm cheating here by picking tshu instead of my most recent fic because my most recent fic is canon pwp lol and iâm sorry but iâm so lame with actors and stuff idk anyone whoâd play them. and idk about names either! SORRY LAYNE
last but not least!
these 11 are from @realitybetterthanfictionâ
1. What made you realize you wanted to start writing fan fiction?
we were hanging at my parentsâ house during a hurricane when they had power and we didnât, and i was bored af and i think nic had just recently published her first fic and i was like....... huh i wonder if i can do that?
2. What fic changed you as a reader or a writer?
nicâs 5 times fic called fire and ice! i remember reading it and thinking WOOHOO PWP!!!! and then crying because she snuck all these FEELINGS in. so it made me think about writing in a different way, i guess. it can be fun and emo lol
3. What is your best writerâs block buster?
idk. havenât really tried anything.
4. Whatâs the last non fan fiction book youâve read?
uhhhhhhhhhhhhh a book about physics and space science (fic research lmaoooooooooooooooo)
5. If you had or have skills like our talented artists in the fandom, whatâs one scene you would like to illustrate? (Can be your own work or anotherâs work)
THE JUGGLING SCENE FROM STRANDED IN A DREAM
6. Whatâs the best piece of writing advice youâve ever gotten?
just keep writing! you can edit later!Â
7. Whatâs one genre youâre hesitant to write but really want to explore?
idk i donât think i have one? maybe aliens?
8. Would you ever cowrite with someone else? And if you have, how to you divide the work?
nic and i are trying BUT ITâS HARD AND WE DONâT KNOW WHAT WEâRE DOINGÂ
9. Do friends outside the fandom know you write? Are they supportive? (I hope they are!!!)
no but my husband does and is
10. What is your favorite fic Niall? (give me all the Niall!)
niall and his churros!!!!!Â
11. What is your favorite supernatural category (examples, vampires, ABO, werewolves, angels, aliens). And can you give a girl some recs?
vampires!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i donât have any recs because my faves are old and everyone knows them:Â madalynn_bohemiaâs vampire series
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Title: The Disasters Author: M.K. England Genre: ya scifi Page Count: 352 Format:Â physical book/audiobook (narrated by James Fouhey) Trigger Warnings: n/a Rating:Â 3.5/5 stars
I had a lot of fun with this! Thatâs probably the best way to describe my overall feelings on this book: fun. If you enjoy fun, punchy scifi, I would definitely pick this up, because I donât think itâll disappoint. I enjoyed the book for what it was, despite the flaws I find with it, which weâll get into more in the spoilery section of the review. But as a basis, I would say pick this up if you enjoy ya scifi, but definitely keep in mind this is a debut novel on their debut book. It was a slightly better than average debut, but still a debut nonetheless, and I canât wait to see where they go from here. With that out of the way, letâs get into this.
I think the most effective method for reviewing this book is going back to the format I had for Smut, and yes, someday I hope to have a consistent structure for these things, but Iâm not sure Iâve figured that out yet.
THE PLOT
So right off the bat, the general plot idea, a small group of people survive a deadly attack and are being chased down to prevent word from getting out/foiling the rest of the plan reminded me of The Illuminae Files, but thatâs not a bad thing. If youâre a scifi book, I donât necessarily think itâs a bad thing to be compared to Illuminae concept wise. But in the middle it goes straight into heist mode, at least for a few chapters, before getting back to the other thing. And I think the plot juggles all of these elements well: the four main characters getting kicked out of the academy, surviving the attack, going to a different planet/galaxy, the heist, stopping the attack, all of it was handled well and still moved at a relatively fast, punchy pace. I think the plot was pretty well woven in every aspect, except for the romantic subplots. And, if you donât like this kind of thing, be warned, this book features a love triangle. And I do feel like âreally guys, itâs 2018 (when this book was published), canât we do better?â
The love triangle was the weakest aspect of this book, plot wise or other, and thatâs not just because I preferred one relationship over the other (though I acknowledge that neither of them were particularly well handled), but weâre going to put a pin in that when we go a little bit deeper into the characters.
The other big issue I had with the plot was that everything all seemed to go a little too conveniently for our heroes. Like, it never really seemed like anyone was in danger, and maybe that was a product of the tone being more on the fun/humor side of things, but it didnât create any sort of tension, and I think the scene where they go to bust Case out of the holding cell and sheâs already free is a good example of that, but even when theyâre actually stealing their ship, and even the big finale, nothing felt like it was actually at stake. And I think thatâs a problem when you spend the first couple of chapters killing a bunch of of nameless characters, but nothing else follows through on that.
THE CHARACTERS
Our main character was Nax Hall, a pilot who failed out of the academy, though it takes a good chunk of the book to find out why. He also has some flight related baggage that carries along through a good majority of the book. He was quick witted and sarcastic and a generally good person and the biggest #DisasterBi I have ever read in a book since Tanner from Autoboyography. He was very easy to like, and I did, ultimately like him. The downside to him, though, is two-fold: one, I donât think the payoff of his tragic backstory/what he did to get kicked out of the academy was really worth it after all the hype for a good... sixty to seventy percent of the book. Yes, you find out he was piloting a rocket and he messed up and injured himself and his brother in a bad crash, but the only repercussions were in his head. The other problem comes back in the form of the aforementioned love triangle, which I think at this point is going to need to have its own section or weâd be here all day.
The other characters, Rion, Zee, Case, and Asra, are all fantastic in their own rights. I loved badass, levelheaded, medical genius, transwoman Zee, and her backstory was the only one I felt genuinely sorry and and hurt for. She was fantastic. My other favorite was Rion, a British rich kid who was charming and funny in a dry way. Genius girl Case, who wants to do the Right Thing, is the most outwardly mean of the group, and has anxiety. In terms of backstory, she was the other of the academy rejects I felt sorry for. Asra was the rebel âhacker/geniusâ behind the operations and I liked her too.
One thing I loved about these characters is you do see them talk and decision make and they donât all trust each other right away, but they still care about each other. Although, I wonât lie, I definitely think Asra couldâve been a little bit more mysterious and unclear in her motivations, maybe to bring some âdo we trust herâ tension, but there was none there. The one time we got a moment like that, it was over before it could really begin. The other thing I loved about this was the diversity. Four of the five main characters were characters of color, at least three of the main cast were LGBT+ explicitly (Iâm not quite sure about Asra).
The one thing that niggled me a bit is that none of the characters really developed much. They just... were. Which I suppose makes sense for how short an amount of time this book spans, but it comes back to bite it in the butt with how close these characters become so fast. I get that they went through something traumatic together, but I wish we had gotten to see more of their bonding.
THE LOVE TRIANGLE
The weakest part of the book. I donât want to spend a lot of time on this, but the love triangle between Rion/Nax/Case was the worst part of the book for me, especially because it felt extremely instaloveish, considering Iâm pretty sure their connections started forming on the first day of like the four they spent together. Like I said, I could see them all being friendly, but a romance? Let alone two? I think it wouldâve been better to cut one or both of them. I will say, from my perspective, Rion and Nax did have better chemistry than Nax and Case, but thatâs not saying much, especially because it felt like Nax was pendulum swinging from one to the other whenever one was in the room, though again, I do think the point goes to Rionâs favor, and it does seem like itâs the one England was setting up more, considering thinking of him when he and Case were kissing is what caused them to stop. However, I really donât like that after the kiss between Nax and Case, Case is just watching all of Nax and Rionâs interactions. Ugh. Hard pass on this one guys, and I usually LOVE a good romance plot/subplot in my books.
THE WRITING
Overall, I think the writing was fine, though take that with a grain of salt because you have to usually be a particularly special amount of awful for me to pick up on it. The one criticism I have regarding the writing is that itâs a little... repetitive. Thereâs countless jokes/comments about Zee and kicking, Nax says Rion or Case do something in a âthoroughly distracting wayâ quite a few times, and Rion and Case even have damn near the same compliment for Nax at one part of the book. The writing never bored or infuriated me, but it didnât spark anything inside me, either. But it was definitely serviceable.
THE THEMES
Ultimately, I think this bookâs heart and soul are in the right place, and itâs message of âweâre all disasters, but we all deserve a chance to flyâ is a good one, if a touch overused. I think it was delivered on well, though if the stakes had been a bit higher or every character didnât have such a specific set of skills, I think this couldâve hit better. But I like the themes/message of the book.
THE AUDIOBOOK
Iâm going to keep it short, since this doesnât really effect the quality of the novel as a whole, but I wanted to comment on it anyway, I think James Fouhey did a good job on the book. I donât know if heâs a new favorite of mine (like Kirsten Leigh is slowly becoming), but I wouldnât be opposed to listening to something he narrates again. I would definitely pick up the audiobook if youâre curious.
CONCLUSION
Iâm recommending this. If you want a fun, fast scifi read that doesnât take itself too seriously and will definitely hold your interest despite its faults, you wonât regret it. I certainly donât regret my time with these human disasters.
#the disasters#review#books#book: the disasters#author: mk england#review: the disasters#genre: young adult#genre: scifi
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Crayola asks: all the pink/purple ones :)
Lol this was more than I realized! Here you go:
Eggplant: Explain your url and avatar.
My url is my real first name, which I like using becauseitâs relatively uncommon, and the âsinisterâ part is because I am left-handedand also interested in strange and dark things. My avatar is a drawing of me byaboutascoolasfrenchtoast! Itâs based on a photo of me in sort of a human Sandycloset cosplay. Itâs from when my hair was a lot longer, but I canât bringmyself to change it.
 Cotton Candy: What is your favorite dessert?
I like a lot of different desserts, lol, but this ask hasreminded me of a really good (very soft and gooey and intensely chocolatey)brownie recipe I havenât made in a while, and so maybe Iâll do that soon J
 Shocking Pink: Is there a trait that you have that othersdonât expect from you?
Not so much a trait, but Iâm 100% sure that the people Iknow in real life (aside from the few who already know) would be surprised bythe amount of tentacle or Santa Claus pr0n that I have written.
 Wisteria: Whatâs your favorite thing about yourself?
The hard-won amount of chill I have gained with every yearof my life. Also being queer. It would suck to have to go through lifestraight.
 Plum: Are you insecure about anything?
I feel like Iâm less flexible than most people and Iâm alittle insecure about that. Also about my ability to write smut with peoplewith the same anatomy as me. Thatâs backwards, isnât it?
 Tickle Me Pink: How do you try to cheer others up whentheyâre sad?
I offer cat pictures and hugs, whichever is possible togive. Sometimes I offer food. But since I donât claim to have strong intuitionabout things, I also sometimes donât  goright into cheering up at all, and go first for saying âthat sucks. Do you wantto be cheered up?â
 Wild Strawberry: Do you care what others think about you?
In certain ways, yes. I care that my bosses and customersthink that Iâm doing my job. I also hope that people donât assume that myactions have the worst motive they can think of behind them (but thatâs mostlya concern for the internet, really). I try in my life to make the best choicesI can and to at the very least, have neutral interactions with people(hopefully positive ones, though!) and so if I can be confident in that, whatpeople think of me should sort itself out. And in terms of like, if I care ifstrangers donât like me being fat or think my haircut is bad or are wonderingif my clothes are pajamas or notâno. Their reactions are their problem.
 Glossy Grape: Recommend something to your followers.
How about some movies Iâve recently seen? 1) Annihilation. Itook a chance on this one even though I hatedEx Machina (which had the same director) and it was amazing! If you like myApotheosis AU or eldritch abomination stories, you should definitely check itout. 2) Colossal. Itâs unique, kind of terrifying at times (but the giantmonster isnât what makes it terrifying) and I just donât want to give too muchaway. Take my word for it!
Also I recommend this recipe for Firecracker [small squarecheese crackers]:
Ingredients: 1 box of [small square cheese crackers].5 cup of vegetable oil1 packet of dry ranch dressing1 tsp red pepper flakes (or however much you feel like)
Method: Preheat oven to 250 degrees FahrenheitPut all ingredients in a big bowl with a lid or a big sealedbag and shake them around until the crackers are coated evenlySpread seasoned crackers on baking sheets so that theyârenot piled upBake for 35 minutes
Yum! Easy treat for you or for a party
 Rose Dust: Describe your aesthetic in five words or less.
Goal: physical comfort, spiritual awe
 Baby Bunny Pink: Do you look young for your age, or do youlook older than you are?
I donât think I look older than I am, and the last personwho guessed my age got it exactly right, so I guess I look exactly my age? ButIâm hoping to develop a style that mostly confuses everyone.
 Petal Pink: Describe your fashion sense as well as whatyouâre wearing right now.
My fashion sense has comfort as the goal, in the directionof like, jewel toned jedi, Chrestomanci, queer wizardsâŠand then on the otherhand, nonsense and cute, with strange colorful prints, weird t-shirts, andspinny skirts. Fashion inspiration from small children who pick out their ownoutfits.
Right now Iâm wearing pants with a sort of paisley patter onthem that feel almost like pajamas and a soft, t-shirt-like dark red dress thatmatches one of the colors in the pattern on the pants.
 Razzle Dazzle Rose: Describe an ideal date.
Dinner at one of those restaurants where thereâs a prix fixemenu of a lot of little dishes, walking around a natural place as the sun sets,going to get ice cream, then going back home to start a movie that we both likeand have already seen before
 Mauvelous: Do you think you deserve a better life than youhave now?
Yes, because universal health care, universal basic income,money spent on infrastructure rather than war, improved status for nonbinarypeople, and open borders would improve my life right now.
 Purple Mountains Majesty: How does someone earn yourrespect?
Respect as in, treating someone like a person: the default.
Respect as in, treating someone like an authority: Musttreat all people with the respect due human beings, and also show by words oractions that they have expertise in the field they want to be an authority in.
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11 questions meme
1tagged by @myrkks, tagging....... @pentaughast @ghoste-catte @beamkatanachronicles anyone who wants to ig :V
1. how would you describe your writing style or âvoiceâ as a writer?
HONESTLY i still feel like iâm growing into my style, lol! and i often feel inconsistent, but i think part of that is a lack of confidence, still, forever #justwritingproblems. being more realistic, i would say that i tend to write from a very firm point of view and my narrators tend to be quite unreliable; i also tend to focus a lot on sensory details. generally iâm very much a stream of consciousness writer! itâs what i love 2 do.
2. do you prefer to write in first person, second person, or third person, and why? which tense do you prefer?
it depends on what iâm working on, and i definitely flip-flop some, but i almost always write in third person. for me, first person works really well for Very Unreliable Narrators who are trying to skew their story in a certain light, or for stories that are literally one person talking to other people. i love love love first person in podcasts! alice isnât dead is probably my favorite podcast that utilizes first person, and i really love the depth of emotion that it conveys as a result, so i am more likely to us first person for projects like that.
generally, though, i struggle with first person because it limits narration in a way that i struggle with at times. second person kind of creeps me out as a writer because i feel like a soulbonder?? WHICH IS NOT A KNOCK ON SECOND PERSON, i think it makes for beautiful work, but itâs just not for me. so 3rd person limited is my favorite and has been for a while!
as for tense, i used to write exclusively in past tense but now i write exclusively in present tense and i couldnât even tell you why. is it because the focus on the present makes for more dynamic writing? is it because iâm pretentious? is it both? likely.
3. what is one thing that inspires/motivates you as a writer these days?
oh man haha . . . spite . . . no not really, itâs a little spite but more feeling a lack and a motivation to fill it! my original work right now is based around a lot of feelings i have about both personal and global uncertainty, and while it isnât a political piece at all, iâve definitely found motivation to explore topics that i wish were easier to talk about. when it comes to fandom stuff, itâs usually âi love this pairing, but i never see work for itâ or âi love this pairing, but i wish there was more diversity of work around it,â because i like filling gaps and also just always fall for pairings few other people care about. iâm also deeply motivated to write character exploration pieces for fandom because holy shit, nothing makes me happier than picking apart a characterâs motivations and rearranging them in a new form. iâm the sylar of other peopleâs characters.
that being said, sometimes my motivation is âwhy are there only like 2 smut fics of this lesbian pairing and 238974293874 of this pairing of 2 dudesâ and that is spite and iâm not sorry for it.
4. what is one of your strengths as a writer?
uhh,,,, i think i have a good attention to detail? is that a cop-out answer? maybe. i have a good grasp of figurative language, i think, and i actually am quite proud of that now that i think about it. i used to write super purple prose, and through the past few years iâve been able to really neaten my writing up so that itâs . . . still flowery! always will be! not sorry! but itâs not overbearingly so, and the figurative language i use enhances the story rather than drowning it. shoutout to @pentaughast who has been writing with me for like five years and giving me feedback until my writing stopped being a horrible disaster thicket of metaphors, youâre a pal.
5. what is something youâd like to improve about your writing?
(rolls out scroll)
no but seriously: my number one thing to improve right now is learning to stop editing while i write. every writer is their own worst critic, but i will literally write half a sentence and then go back and change the whole thing, because iâm convinced that everything has to be Perfect the First Time. which is in fact a microcosm of my entire personality. so, anne, donât edit while you write! also, your first draft is not your final draft! i donât feel a need to just barf out a certain number of words per writing session, but i do think itâll benefit me to have momentum and iron out kinks later.
6. what is one genre you enjoy writing in, and why?
hmmm this is interesting because genre is such a broad and subjective thing. that said: urban fantasy is and has always been my jam! i wouldnât say iâm particularly good at it simply because 1) it is a super vague genre with few hard and fast rules, so iâm not sure how much of my stuff is urban fantasy even, and 2) iâve been struggling a lot with writing original stuff over the past few years, which is where i have written urban fantasy stuff in the past.
overall i enjoy writing in fantasy or fantasy/sci-fi most of all genres, but never high fantasy because it causes me physical agony. aspects of f/sf i like a lot are basically f/sf as a mirror to our world or otherwise connected to our world (without necessarily using f/sf components as a substitution for actual discussion of oppression cuz, nah,) as well as f/sf as satire, that is my FAVE. discworld (t. pratchett) was the first fantasy series i really locked onto and it was v formative, obviously; also gaiman, stiefvater, jemisin. this question was not about my influences but too bad here they are!!!!!!!!!!
7. what would be the biggest compliment someone could give you about your writing?
the biggest, biggest compliment would be: while i was reading this, i forgot the world existed. because that has always been the biggest thing for me as a reader! the way reading can just take you somewhere, so no matter how shitty things might be in your actual situation, you can just take a break from that and follow bilbo around, or whatever. another really excellent compliment that i actually have gotten (both in writing fic and rp) is âi can hear their voice,â either in narration or dialogue. thatâs huge! and it makes me really happy to hear. basically i would love for my writing to be an immersive experience for people, and thatâs what iâm always striving to improve.
8. what is one piece of advice youâd give someone experiencing writerâs block or feeling stuck with their writing?
READ
idk, for me, fighting my writerâs block literally does not work. just staring at a piece of paper or a computer screen makes me upset and frustrated. reading, though, is both enjoyable and relatively passive; you donât have to come up with ideas, you just have to take in someone elseâs. as a writer, too, you can read both as an audience member and as a fellow writer observing. what does this author do that works or doesnât? how does this style work in this context where it might not in another? how does it relate to your style? etc.
more generally, do something nice for yourself cuz sometimes that will boost your creative spirit. self-care is huge!
9. what is one piece of advice you wish someone had given you when you started writing?
lskdjfskld uh . . . donât follow any of the advice people give you because most of it either only works for specific people or is entirely bullshit? i suppose more specifically i wish someone had been more supportive of fantasy/sci-fi as a legitimate genre with meaning, although of course that is a societal view rather than a specific one that surrounded me as a kid. itâs shitty, though, because until fairly recently i viewed the type of writing i enjoyed as âless thanâ/less meaningful than like, i donât know, anything written by racist old dead white guys.
also, young adult fiction is fucking valid and doesnât make you a less âseriousâ writer. i, a Fucking Grown Up, am still most captivated by YA fiction because there are fewer restrictions on it and writers tend to experiment more and, most importantly, because stories about transformation and trying to figure out who you are will never not be compelling.
10. what is a common piece of writing advice you disagree with, and why?
rubs hands together
one: write what you know. what the fuck is that, i want to know who came up with it because fuck? you??? definitely itâs fine to write about things that you have a personal perspective about, or to write in a way that reflects your worldview or emotions or whatever. but write what you know is literally the stupidest, most limiting garbage, and i have met so many grown ass adults who believe in it so strongly. curse that mess.
two: you must construct x type of work in y format following z formula. a lot of times this is really great and works well for people, but other times it can be, again, really limiting. beginning-middle-end is great, but even that can be inappropriate for certain stories, depending on what they are? for me, strictly following writing formulas made me overly focused on ââaccuracyââ and less focused on writing what i enjoyed.
three: this one isnât quite as cut and dry as the previous two, but: write protagonists that people can relate to. hereâs the thing: i feel like this often gets translated to âprotagonists that are charmingly aware of their own assholeishness, totally perfect and always right, or bland,â and itâs kind of a shitty trap to fall into? this is another reason i love unreliable narrators, bcause you can have that nuance and imperfection without the entire story being about how shitty the character is. their imperfection is part of the story and perhaps even a driving force, but they arenât just sort of a paper cutout used to drive the story along. hello iâm anne and i struggle writing protagonists.
11. what writing projects are you working on these days?
excited buzzing. a couple! i am really shy about talking about original stuff, but i am working on scripts for (tentatively) a podcast about a very apathetic and cynical gal who is one of a very few survivors of a series of natural disasters and also may?be the one who made them happen. Whoopsie.
fanfiction-wise, i am working on finishing . . . christ on a raft let me count. four! one-shots. thereâs a fifth one that i wrote 10k words of in like 2015 and still havenât finished and i donât know if iâll trash it or not lol. regardless, i am working on those! there is a fic that i started working on a while back that was meant to be a multi-chapter fic called reverse about giorno tripping into vampirism and fugo having 0 idea what to do about it; iâve let it dangle for ages, but i am slowly fleshing out the plot again and getting it going. iâm very excited to do this! i love giorno having to figure out how to vampire and i love fugio.
finally, @relares and i are starting to work on a reset fugiomis fic which, weeps into tea, will kill us both.
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Recent Great Naruto Fics Iâve Read List
Seeing as the actual series now suck... hereâs a list of the fics/one shots Iâve recently read (past year) that you might enjoy, have fun xx
Warning: List contains all kinds of pairings. Some stories have no pairings at all (those are labelled as General).Â
Directions: story name - author - summary - status - pairing/gen - rating
Pulling My Weight by Invisible Shadow -Â During the mission to Wave, Sakura realises that she has to become a better ninja for her teammates' sake and be someone they can depend on. She vows to take her training seriously, and receives help from the most unlikely of sources; Genma Shiranui. The two form an unlikely bond and stick together through thick and thin, while Sakura improves and meets other people along the way. Ongoing | General so far | T | This story is fucking amazing
A Wrinkle in Time by rightforlife -Â The Fourth Shinobi War ended in disaster. They won, but at a price too great to bear. Given a second chance, what exactly can Konoha's three most powerful men do? Time travel, old enemies, and old friends that all leads to a new future. Ongoing | General | T
The Colder Water by Quillslinger -Â The devil is in the details. Shisui. Itachi. A sorta love story. Novella. Complete (52,784) | ShiIta | TÂ
Uneasy Coexistence by DeGlace -Â One grinning sharkâman. One pinkâhaired medic. Ankles. Teeth. Kisame x Sakura. Yes, you read that right. Complete (70,111) | KisaSaku | M
Blind Stars of Fortune by 100demons -Â Thirty year old Kakashi was supposed to have been killed by Pein during the Invasion. Instead, he wakes up in the body of his twenty year old self. (It gets a lot more complicated.) Time travel. Complete (78,591) | General | T
To Promise Forever by Hellsig Otoupeim - The war's over, Kaguya has been defeated and the five great Shinobi Nations have gone back to their homelands to nurse the wounds left behind. In an attempt to preserve peace, the five Kage have agreed to implement in a new measure; war veterans between villages are encouraged to take part in the Five Nation Letter Exchange Program. Or how a girl from Kiri ends up in Konoha. Sly AU. Complete (14,442) | ShikakuOC | M
Heart Under a Blade by fineillsignup - Sitting on a bench after being told by Sasuke-kun that she's annoying, Sakura thinks that it's the worst day of her life. Lying in the hospital wanting to hurl from heat suppressants later that day and grappling with the revelation that she's an omega, Sakura knows that it's the worst day of her life. (ABO, extremely slow build). Ongoing | KakaSaku | M
Phantom Pains by mapplepie - There is something going on with Kakashi, but Minato can't figure out what. All he has are distressing deductions, each one progressively worse than the last. It's no wonder Minato can't help but fear and fear and fear. (To be fair though, it really wasn't his fault he never considered the possibility of time-travel). Complete (22,153) | General | T
A Twist in Time by Wolf08 -Â With Konoha on the verge of destruction, Sakura is sent on a last-resort mission to save her world by travelling to the past. Join her in coping with her old body's shortcomings, testing the natural laws of time, falling in love all over again, exploring the depths of her mind and rediscovering who she is. Time-travel. Â Ongoing | SasuSaku | T | I donât even like SS anymore (I almost hate them) but this is my favourite fic ever.
Deadly Decisions by Alrissa -Â Haruno Sakura that actually caught a glimpse of the real world and woke up to smell the blood. Basically a 'what if' preview of what could have happened if Sakura didn't revert after the Chuunin exams. No princess to be rescued here. Complete (17,819) | General | M
Contagious by rabid behemoth - Konoha's citizens are being controlled by a virus, and it falls on Sakura's shoulders to save them. A double agent among the most hostile, unrepentant criminals in the world, she finds herself navigating between competing loyalties in a sea of moral uncertainty. But that's impossible for a faithful Leaf nin like Sakura. Loyalties aren't contagious...right? Complete (119,552) | ItaSaku | T
The Lives Worth Saving by cywsaphyre -Â Naruto, at 26, has lived through 10 years of war. At the end, with nothing left to call home, he sends himself back to the beginning, to the day of his younger self's graduation, in an attempt to change it all. Time travel AU. Discontinued | General | T | best time travel fic Iâve ever read
Kill Your Heroes by Evil Is A Relative Term - Because, sometimes, we are what our adversaries make of us. Because GatĆ only needed Zabuza to neutralize Kakashi. He isn't afraid of one little pink-haired genin. But even mice will bite when cornered. A story of where fear drives the most vulnerable member of Team Seven, from Wave and beyond. Ongoing | General | T
I Found You Missing by Wolfy Tales -Â 'They're asking us because these soldiers have absolutely no one left to write home to,' Sakura thought with a frown. So she signs up for the Shinobi Letter Exchange, not realizing how large the consequences would be. Complete (18,586) | KakaSaku | T
Teach Your Children Well by AvocadoLove -Â After Madara final attack on the village, Rokudaime Kakashi uncovers a time-travel scroll. Now he's Team Seven's sensei again. And this time, he's going to do things differently. A time travel fic. Complete (37,849) | KakaIru | K+
The Arrangement by Yuugiri -Â "We're already getting along bad enough. Why don't we just get married?" Complete (111,453) | GaaIno | T
Sabotage by therealesther -Â When her fifth date got food poisoning, and her sixth date cancelled in over the phone in a tone bordering on hysteria, Sakura decided things were getting out of hand. Complete (1,637) | KakaSaku | K+
To Love and to Love Again by animequeen100 -Â Love blooms even in the strangest of places, and darkest of hours. Sasuke has a daughter who needs a mother. Sakura has a son, who needs a father. When the shadows that follow her threaten to take her away from him, his dark secrets resurface to keep her in his arms. They were fated to love and destined to love again. Complete (401,061) | SasuSaku | M
The Good Wife by ReiraKurenai -Â Sixteen-year-old Ino is stuck in the body of her older self. Now she must embark on the journey of an adult, a wife and a mother while deep down she's still just a child herself. What does the future have in store for her? NarutoxIno and various pairings. Ongoing | NaruIno | T
Ripples by Yellow Mask - AU from 309 onwards. Following a botched mission, Sakura is made a slave by Sound, a position that could very well alter the futureâŠespecially concerning a certain familiar missing-nin. Complete (143,883) | SasuSaku | T
Set in Ink by TappityTap -Â "From then on, it became their own private ritual: She'd arrive at his place, they'd talk, she'd undress, he'd draw her, she'd look at his work and compliment it, he'd touch her until she quivered and cried out his name in a sweet burst of release. This ritual was always the same but somehow different and exciting every time. " Pure SaiIno smut. Some canon pairings mentioned. Complete (7,422) | SaiIno | M
The Cursed Geisha by wingedmercury -Â He's beautiful, in the same way that predatory animals are beautifulâdark, mysterious. Dangerous. Only this time, instead of being the predator, Sasuke will learn what it means to be prey. AU. Complete (43,612) | SasuHina | M
Will of Fire by Cynchick - Forced to flee their village and the new regime, the loyal shinobi of Konoha must find a way to preserve their way of life and take back their home. As they fight for their future, Team Seven struggles to overcome the past. Complete (223,234) | KakaSaku | M
The Secret Life of Teachers by tabine - Romance is a bit difficult to do when you spend a majority of your time within fifty feet of the object of your affections and somehow still don't quite understand that you're falling in love with them, if only because being a full-time high school teacher while taking graduate school courses takes precedence over everything else. A Nejiten high school teachers AU. Ongoing | NejiTen | T
The Line by livezinshadowz - When a young Ino tries to use the Shintenshin for the first time on Naruto, something goes wrong and the two find themselves temporarily stuck in the other's body. A series of moments depicting the evolution of their relationship, from acquaintances to friends to something more, all by crossing that metaphorical line created when a boy and a girl forge a bond. Complete (46,692) | NaruIno | T
In Another Life by CelestialCircumference - Kakashi never believed in soul mates until that fateful day. Written for HatakeFran for the KakaSaku Secret Santa 2016 on tumblr. Complete (18,350) | KakaSaku | T
House of Crows by SilverShine -Â War is coming to Konoha and Sakura is far from home, uncertain of her future. But one thing is for sure, Sakura will protect her unborn child at all costs, whether it be from Konoha's enemies... or from its own father. Complete (400,508) | KakaSaku | M
Better Off Dead by wingedmercury - When Hinata leaves Konoha, heartbroken but resolute, the last person she expects to see over the rim of her tea cup is him. "You look like you've just seen a ghost," he smirks, and Hinata thinks that some people are just better off dead. Complete (68,768) | SasuHina | T
The Song Of Kakashi by ZatannaZatara06 - If you want forever, you are going to have to suffer for it. For the KakaSaku Week 2016 Day 2 Theme: Fairy tales / Legends Myth: The story of Achilles and Patroclus. Complete (2,472) | KakaSaku | T
Kunoichi's Burden: Village First by lilac haze -Â She was dying. She should have died. She was supposed to die but the Gods had other plans. Sakura is thrown back in the past, where a dangerously attractive blonde and a loud mouthed redhead have taken it upon themselves to make her life even more difficult. If Naruto's parents didn't get together, kami, she would be in a lot of trouble. MinatoXSakura. Time travel-fic. Complete (378,854) | MinaSaku | T
On a Leash by thekatthatbarks -Â Kakashi's new puppy ends up being his best wingman. Complete (1,082) | KakaSaku | T
House Calls by Spoiled Sweet -Â Always the Team Mom, Sakura opens up her home as a clinic for the hospital-phobic ninja of Konoha. At the same time, her relationship with Kakashi begins to evolve in a way she never expected. Complete (262,803) | KakaSaku | M
Things You Just Donât Talk About by Enodia -Â "Do you enjoy sex?" Shikamaru asked bluntly. I just can't believe I'm talking about this, and with Shikamaru, of all people, Sakura thought." Sakura is in for a surprise. Or, rather, a series of surprises. Complete (118,175) | ShikaSaku | M
Players by Kukaburraxxii - Ino joins the league of players. Discontinued | GenIno | M
Heatwave by Yahboobeh -Â When she found her breath again it was ragged. Only one thought tore through her mind: Consume me. The Suna sun wasn't the only reason their faces burned. Ongoing | NejiTen | M
The Art of War by leafygirl -Â Entry for the LJ Kakasaku AU contest. Sakura gets stuck following her teacher after a bet with her friends. But his mysterious life is nothing she ever expected. Complete (20,591) | KakaSaku | T
The Shinobi Princess by Winged Lady Colette - At the end of the Fourth Great Ninja War, Sakura takes an unexpected trip into the time of Konoha's Founding. Ongoing | HashiSaku | M
Dawning by deleria -Â After years of silence the Akatsuki are active again. Her allies uncertain, the Godaime sends two teams - one for a potential offensive strike and another for covert surveillance. Who would have guessed that Shikamaru and Sakura could fake it as newlyweds so well? ShikaSaku with early (one-sided) hints of SasuSaku. Complete (101,994) | ShikaSaku | M
Genius Sensei by AlexDnD -Â What if Kakashi had recovered from his deep depression? What if he turned out to be a true genius as a sensei? Watch as team 7 develops into a truly capable shinobi team! Complete | NaruSaku-ish | T | A fun read
We Are Never (ever getting back together) by natanije -Â In which Sakura waited, got tired of waiting, and decided to never wait ever again. (Or, in which Sakura never chased after Sasuke when she got pregnant). Complete (2,592) | General | T
A Poor Imitation by leafygirl -Â Sakura is injured on a mission, forgetting everything she knew of life in Konoha. Complete (88,913) | KakaSaku | M
The Girl From Whirlpool by SilverShine -Â When Naruto's father met his mother, his only impression was that a village out there must have been missing its idiot. Complete (248,299) | MinaKushi | T
The Way of the Wind by just enough - ANBU Captain Uchiha Itachi had things well planned out, until a medic-nin with ridiculous hair went and made herself interesting. Sakura insisted she was just doing her job, but Itachi didn't quite see it that way. Non-massacre. Complete (158,542) | ItaSaku | M
Cause for Conversation by firefly -Â Hinata has always been intimidated by Sasuke, but when she serves as a substitute for Sakura on a mission, she comes to learn that the stoic Uchiha is not so bad after all. Complete (4,858) | SasuHina | K+
The Price by Nenagh24 -Â This would have almost been hilarious, the renowned copy ANBU almost petrified of a small unarmed girl, had it not been happening to him. The price of this tiny bride was going to break him. Hello, fiery flames of eternal doom. Complete (19,067) | KakaSaku | T
Better Having Met You by KakashiSauce - Tenzou is wide-eyed, bright faced and unprepared for the ANBU life ahead of him. MOSTLY because of the unorthodox team he's placed into. However, it was done in his best interest, and Hiruzen is smart enough to know what is best for most young shinobi. Kakashi disagrees, but he is one of those young shinobi who doesn't know whats best for him. Ongoing | KakaYama | M
Icha Icha Gambit by TheSilverScarecrow -Â It was a risk; one that could potentially ruin their team, however, who was Hatake Kakashi to argue with the Hokage? But when a never to be finished Icha Icha draft falls into his possesion things start getting wildly out of hand as Sakura does whatever it takes to protect their village from a devastating weapon. Ongoing | KakaSaku | M
Nutrire by Wolfy Tales -Â As Ino traverses the world with Yamato after the war to neutralize potential threats, she finds out that they share more in common than just an interest in plants. Complete (32,251) | YamaIno | T
Let's Get Married by luvtoshi - It was supposed to be a simple solution to their immediate problems. But maybe they took more than they can chew? Complete (59,760) | NaruSaku | M
Hot Medicine by Saphri - Kakasaku one-shot. AU. Fighting fires was a tough job by all accounts. But when the job requires getting treated by beautiful pink haired paramedics it was worth the hardship. Complete (26,05) | KakaSaku | M
A Noble in Secret by WhiteMint - Side story to the Imperial Princess. C originally hated the people of Konoha, often referring to them as "Konoha dogs". But as he got to know the small pink haired girl who followed him around like a puppy, he no longer considered the term as maliciously as before. After all, he found his own little Konoha dog, and he planned on keeping her. Ancient Chinese AU. Complete (4,420) | CSaku | K+
Cherry Blossom Flames by Winged Lady Colette - A seven year old amnesiac awoke in a stream, being rescued by two brothers.  Ongoing | MadaSaku | M
Adaline by Nikki1212 -Â I would choose you in a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, in any version of reality, I would find you and I would choose you. AU. Ongoing | KakaSaku | T
Tempest by cywsaphyre -Â Back in time and armed with years of future knowledge, Sakura is ready to take the world by storm. Except... she's four again, not twelve. Ah well, nobody said she couldn't start a little early. Gen, time travel, AU, Sakuracentric. Discontinued | General | T
All This Time by thekatthatbarks -Â "I may not have fell like you did. I didn't fall gradually and slow over the span of twenty years. It was fast and sudden. It had me stumbling looking around trying to figure out where I was. I didn't even know it had happened." Complete (2,472) | ShikaSaku | K+
Team 8 by SâTarKan -Â What if Naruto had been selected for a different team? What if he'd had a different mentor? Who would guess the consequences would be so large? Ongoing | NaruHina | T | I donât even like NaruHina anymore but this story is amazing (plot-oriented)
Better Man by Kakashisgf -Â Sakura and Sasuke have been married for over a decade, but things are far from perfect, and Sakura's beginning to realize that maybe she deserves better. Complete (179,759) | KakaSaku | M
Dirty Laundry by Slinkymilinky - Sakura had never been a fan of airing her dirty laundry in publicâŠbut Kakashi was often the exception to the rule. Lemony Oneshot. Complete (6,593) | KakaSaku | M
Time and Again by KyLewin -Â Time Travel fic. In a war torn future, in the burning ruins of Konohagakure, Naruto fights Orochimaru and loses as the world collapses around him. From that ending comes a new beginning and a new chance to set things right, if only he can figure out how.. Complete (456,787) | General | T
The Samurai and the Oni Girl by Silberias -Â AU KakaSaku set in Edo-period Japan. Sakura is the descendant of a red-haired foreigner as well as a merchant's daughter. Kakashi is a local samurai who has fallen on hard times, a man whose pride has been broken down to this point. Love comes after. Complete (131,644) | KakaSaku | T
Chippendales by Voyna -Â [AU] Sometimes, a girl needs a lap-dance to put life into perspective. Complete (15,645) | SasuHina | M
Once More, With Feeling by JinnySkeans - Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time. Complete (127,462) | SasuSaku | M
In Case of Blue Scroll by Leola Majora -Â In Case of Blue Scroll the Hokage must lock himself in his office and pull his hair out as what he thought were memories of a long lost love turn out to be the memories of a mission he was about to assign his former student, Sakura Haruno. Complete (48,635) | KakaSaku | M
[Iâll update this again soon!]
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THE MEGA RP PLOTTING SHEET / MEME.
First and foremost, recall that no one is perfect, we all had witnessed some plotting once which did not went too well, be it because of us or our partner. So here have this, which may help for future plotting. Itâs a lot! Yes, but perhaps give your partners some insight? Anyway BOLD what fully applies, italicize if only somewhat. Long post!
MUN NAME: JINNÂ Â Â AGE: 21Â Â Â Â CONTACT: IM, Discord
CHARACTER(S): Mahariel, Tabris (HoF), Lavellan, Trevelyan (Inquisitors), 4 OCs.
CURRENT FANDOM(S): Dragon Age
FANDOM(S) YOU HAVE AN AU FOR: Â I donât have any yet for the moment!
MY LANGUAGE(S): Italian (native), English (proficiency), French (Intermediate)
THEMES IâM INTERESTED IN FOR RP: FANTASY / SCIENCE FICTION / HORROR / WESTERN / ROMANCE / THRILLER / MYSTERY / DYSTOPIA / ADVENTURE / MODERN / EROTIC / CRIME / MYTHOLOGY / CLASSIC / HISTORY / RENAISSANCE / MEDIEVAL / ANCIENT / WAR / FAMILY / POLITICS / RELIGION / SCHOOL / ADULTHOOD / CHILDHOOD / APOCALYPTIC / GODS / SPORT / MUSIC / SCIENCE / FIGHTS / ANGST / SMUT / DRAMA / ETC.
PREFERRED THREAD LENGTH:Â 2 PARA / NOVELLA
ASKS CAN BE SEND BY: MUTUALS / ANONS
CAN ASKS BE CONTINUED?: YES / NO / OCCASIONALLY Â - only by Mutuals?: Â YES / NO
PREFERRED THREAD TYPE: CRACK / CASUAL / SERIOUS / DEEP AS HECK. / ALL
IS REALISM / RESEARCH IMPORTANT FOR YOU IN CERTAIN THEMES?: Â YES / NO / DEPENDS
ARE YOU ATM OPEN FOR NEW PLOTS?: Â YES / NO / DEPENDS. (college)
DO YOU HANDLE YOUR DRAFT / ASK - COUNT WELL?: Â YES / NO / SOMEWHAT. (irl makes coping difficult sometimes)
HOW LONG DO YOU USUALLY TAKE TO REPLY?: 24H / 1 WEEK / 2 WEEKS / 3+ WEEKS / MONTHS / YEARS.
IâM OKAY INTERACTING WITH:Â Â Â Â ORIGINAL CHARACTERS / A RELATIVE OF MY CHARACTER (AN OC) / DUPLICATES / CROSSOVERS / MULTI-MUSES / SELF-INSERTS / PEOPLE WITH NO AU VERSE FOR MY FANDOM / CANON-DIVERGENT PORTRAYALS / AU-VERSIONS(ish)
DO YOU POST MORE IC OR OOC?: IC / OOC / BOTH IN A BALANCE
ARE YOU SELECTIVE WITH FOLLOWING OTHERS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS. Â
BEST WAYS TO APPROACH YOU FOR RP/PLOTTING:Â Honestly? Come up to me and talk! I swear Iâm friendly and donât bite. Iâm not particularly shy so I am the one writing first at times.
WHAT EXPECTATIONS DO YOU HOLD TOWARDS YOUR PLOTTING PARTNER: Just honesty and mutual respect. I like to throw ideas and memes at plotting partners, and I will acknowledge if someone isnât into a particular idea. I like having the same :)
WHEN YOU NOTICE THE PLOTTING IS RATHER ONE-SIDED, WHAT DO YOU DO?: Â Usually I write to the partner for new ideas, maybe to spice up the thread a bit.Â
HOW DO YOU USUALLY PLOT WITH OTHERS, DO YOU GIVE INPUT OR LEAVE MOST WORK TOWARDS YOUR PARTNER?:Â I often throw as many ideas into the story as I can, I donât mind if some of the ideas that land are mostly mine but I like the concept of two people throwing ideas around, given that thereâs the same interest in the plot!
WHEN A PARTNER DROPS THE THREAD, DO YOU WISH TO KNOW?: Â YES / NO / DEPENDS. - AND WHY?: I donât mind if people drop one liners. Theyâre supposed to be casual and entertaining to a point. Ih the thread in question is a plotted one, I donât mind if the other wishes to drop it â just let me know!
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY LEAD YOU TO DROP A THREAD?: Â I usually never drop threads intentionally, itâs mostly due to... the drafts nightmare that this website has. However, I may drop casual threads. Rarely plotted ones, and in that case it might be because of lack of time.
WILL YOU TELL YOUR PARTNER?: Â YES / NO / DEPENDS.
IS COMMUNICATION IN THE RPC IMPORTANT TO YOU?   YES / NO. - AND WHY?: Itâs nice to get to know the person youâre plotting with. Sometimes I forget to reply to messages, but I enjoy talking with other people on Discord, even if it can be brief. Communication at any level keeps a point of understanding for the plot as well.
ARE YOU OKAY WITH ABSOLUTE HONESTY, EVEN IF IT MAY MEANS HEARING SOMETHING NEGATIVE ABOUT YOU AND/OR PORTRAYAL?: Naturally, as long as itâs constructive. It doesnât mean that Iâm going to accept every critique I will eventually get, since writing is what I do for my job. Given that this site is a guilty pleasure and only that, I use trophies / cliches / repetition in some characters / backgrounds, because itâs fun. So thereâs not a high level of seriousness on my part here, honestly.
DO YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE SUCH SITUATION IN A MATURE WAY? YES / NO.
WHY DO YOU RP AGAIN, IS THERE A GOAL?: I love stories, I love writing. Itâs something to keep me in training with english and writing in general. Keeps my mind active.
WISHLIST, BE IT PLOTS OR SCENARIOS:Â I will eventually make a wishlist post for each and everyone of my characters. Though the ones that would be more interesting, for the moment, would be an arc for Milot in which he grows a bit from the idiot bigot child he is while getting some recognition for his abilities an arc for Feirun who has trust issues and would simply like to feel like she belongs somewhere, thus indulging in friendships â and an arc for Dianor regarding the Calling, to see where it could lead, whether to the finding of a cure or to his death.
THEMES I WONâT EVER RP / EXPLORE: Â There arenât specific themes I will never explore, but some themes, however, like suicide, Iâd be willing to explore if done with taste and regard to others and with a person who would be willing to explore it with me. Iâm about realism, and given that some themes are a bit heavy for me as well I always do it in a manner that does not diminish neither the theme nor the person involved with it.
WHAT TYPE OF STARTERS DO YOU PREFER / DISLIKE, CANâT WORK WITH?: I can usually work with anything, but one liners that feel empty in attempt are usually really frustrating.Â
WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE MOST?: Â Going for the cliches: innocent young ones, honor-bound ones and villains. I donât have much of a preference but these tend to be more fun for me.
WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE LEAST?: Â Self-inserts that claim to be self-inserts and that end up being straight up mary sues. I like self-inserts when portrayed naturally and truthfully, even if itâs the type of character that doesnât catch my eye at first.
WHAT ARE YOUR STRONG ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: Iâm very laid back and Iâm patient. Given that I actually spent a lot of my time on this site and know the kinds of people wandering these halls, I know who to avoid in case of senseless drama and how to handle it if directed at me or at my rp partners. I would also like to add feel lucky to have met people who are the same on this site.
WHAT ARE YOUR WEAK ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: It can often be consistency. I can be really pumped up for a plot, then be extremely slow in replying to threads. Right now itâs mostly due to the fact that all of these muses are new and I have to think about what theyâd say and do. An initial idea shared with a rp partner, too, might fall apart the moment I realise that it couldnât work with my muse for the same reason.
DO YOU RP SMUT?: Â YES / NO / DEPENDSÂ on the character Iâm writing. It has to make sense for the muse; if my current muses are, for example, Dianor, Vincent or Lottie, they have a higher chance of being open to smut. Others need an emotional connection or very specific requirements. Iâm not against it entirely, though Iâm terrible at writing it.
DO YOU PREFER TO GO INTO DETAIL?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.
ARE YOU OKAY WITH BLACK CURTAIN, FADE TO BLACK?: YES / NO.
WHEN DO YOU RP SMUT? MORE OUT OF FUN OR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT?: Again, depends on the muse.
ANYTHING YOU WOULD NOT WANT TO RP THERE?:  As said above, Iâm open for most âunpopularâ themes, if treated with regard and taste. Big nopes are themes like animal abuse or child abuse.
ARE SHIPS IMPORTANT TO YOU?:  YES / NO.  Ships can be of any kind â platonic, romantic, familiar and so on. Human connection is important in stories, and to find some is always a good thing for me.
WOULD YOU SAY YOUR BLOG IS SHIP-FOCUSED?: YES / NO. I do have some ships going on but Iâd still run my blog if there werenât many. I like exploring different kinds of relationships, not just the positive ones.
DO YOU USE READ MORE?: Â YES / NO / SOMETIMES WHEN I WRITE LONG STUFF.
ARE YOU: Â MULTI-SHIP / SINGLE-SHIP / DUAL-SHIP Â â Â MULTIVERSE / SINGLEVERSE.
WHAT DO YOU LOVE TO EXPLORE THE MOST IN YOUR SHIPS?: I enjoy it when particular romantic ships lead to internal conflicts within my muses. For example, Feirun has 0 interpersonal skills and has never been with anyone before, therefore seeing her accepting the fact that she has feelings for someone, and growing a sense of worth that leads her to go for it, is fantastic. For Octavia, too, despite her lack of interest in sex, she can still be romantically interested in people, which happens rarely due to her difficult character; when it does happen, she tends to become a bit softer, and thatâs my jam.
ARE YOU OKAY WITH PRE-ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIPS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.
âș SECTION ABOUT YOUR MUSE.
- WHAT COULD POSSIBLY MAKE YOUR MUSE INTERESTING TOWARDS OTHERS, WHY SHOULD THEY RP WITH THIS PARTICULAR CHARACTER OF YOURS NOW, WHAT POSSIBLE PLOTS DO THEY OFFER?: Dianor is the worst warden on the website, probably, reckless and a troublemaker; he can lead to plots with adventures, theft and unexpected camaraderie. Tristan is an Inquisitor who only wishes to be strong enough to protect everyone, he can be all about love and support to other muses or create interesting conflicts. Feirun is a feral squirrel, honestly, but due to her background she can lead to interesting plots tied with Tevinter or the Qun. Milot is a young soldier who wishes to prove himself, he is often in need of guidance but he himself can teach a thing or two about being comfortable with oneâs self. Vincent is a particular kind of abomination, thus it could be interesting to have him interact with other mages / templars / really, anyone who has a problem with demons. Lottie is an orlesian spy and a functional psychopath, it can lead to many interesting plots with a large variety of characters. Octavia could be one of the most interesting ones given her background, since the actions of whoever surrounds her in the Inquisition could lead her to find actual morals and discover emotional intelligence rather than having her stay the same person she was before.
WITH WHAT TYPE OF MUSES DO YOU USUALLY STRUGGLE TO RP WITH?: Â Characters who see everything in black and white.
WHAT DO THEY DESIRE, WHAT IS THEIR GOAL?: Â Dianor just wants to find a cure for the calling and live freely. Tristan thinks he wants to save everyone, but he really needs people who help him overcome his own issues. Feirun wants somewhere to belong, people to be close with, having been alone for most of her life. Milot wants to become a knight and be treated like the other soldiers, without the special treatment he often gets due to his age. Lottie just wants money, I think. Vincent wants to either find a way to get the demon out of his body or die. Octavia would like to take revenge on her father and go back to Tevinter, but she might need some emotional guidance at first.
WHAT CATCHES THEIR INTEREST FIRST WHEN MEETING SOMEONE NEW?: Â Dianor gets along with other rogues. Tristan is like a dog, happy to see anyone. Feirun has a particular interest for the Qunari. Milot greatly regards knights and people in power who show honor and integrity. Octavia likes people who do their job and are unapologetic about it. Lottie enjoys meeting any kind of character that she could get something out of. Vincent is often very happy to see other mages and men, honestly.
WHAT THEMES DO THEY LIKE TALKING ABOUT?: Â Dianor likes to tell stories of any kind. Tristan enjoys talking about plans for the Inquisition. Feirun likes to talk about lore, archeological finds, books and magic. Milot... likes to talk about battles, I guess. Lottie enjoys discussing Orlais fashion. Octavia loves discussing magic, blood magic specifically. Vincent likes to discuss art.
DID THEY EVER WENT THROUGH SOMETHING TRAUMATIC?: Â Dianor lost his best friend Tamlen and had to save Thedas, now the Calling is killing him from the inside. Tristan couldnât save a clan of dalish elves being attacked by a Teyrn. Feirun was abandoned by the dalish when she was 8 and was beaten and hunted by Templars for a while. Octavia discovered she was an half-elf and fruit of scandal and went on the run for it. Vincent was friends with a spirit who turned into a demon while saving his life from templars. Milot saw his farm, his home being destroyed by battles between mages, templars and demons. Lottie... once wore bad shoes?
WHAT COULD LEAD TO AN INSTANT KILL?: Â Darkspawn for everyone. Mages for Milot. Templars for Feirun and Vincent.
IS THERE SOMEONE /-THING THEY HATE?: Â Darkspawn. Mages in general for Milot, heâs really afraid of them and would not hesitate to bring them down in battle. Feirun and Vincent detest the Templars due to the abuse theyâve faced because of them.
ARE YOUR MUSES EASY TO APPROACH?: Dianor, Tristan and Vincent are the easiest ones to approach. The others can be... difficult to handle at first.
SOMETHING YOU MAY STILL WANT TO POINT OUT ABOUT YOUR MUSES?: I apologise for some of them being sluts or bigots. I love them all the same.
CONGRATS!!! You managed it, now tag your mutuals! â„
tagged by:Â Â indecently stolen! tagging: anyone who actually read this i guess!
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