#i think the killing myself part is nsrs

[tybaltsrapier]

hell couldn't get to me so it gave me mental illness which affected me which made me feel guilty for being like this which makes it worse aka making a positive feedback loop aka what if I kill myself ( nsrs )

[bestial4ngel]

UGH !!! The way that their dad referred to it as a game, referred to people as economic units- dehumanizing them by viewing and talking about them as if they’re inanimate drones, and always made it about winning or losing. The way that the kids and everyone in his world/circle is hollow and wooden… they are exactly what he made them to be- pawns. Nothing but disposable and lifeless pawns that are only brought to life by the game player and the game, only useful when on the chessboard, and only useful as a means to gain a win for the player.

[thatcheeseycandle]

//SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 29 OF IN PURSUIT OF SELF SINCE YKNOW REACTION POST

Preparing myself as I read this BEHHAHDHD

I LOVE HOW THE TITLE CARD IS THE SAME ONE FROM THE CROWNED ENGINE YAYDYSHDVC

Ohg osg OH NGOBOONNOO CLUNC ASLTLE GET OTU GET OTU MOVE

.

MS PARSONS YOU LITTLE. YOU MY GOSH YOU JUST ABANDONED CLUNC ASTLE. NY GOAHAHDDHHA

Oi OI OI OOOJOJIII BLUE OETER WOOOOOOO BLUE PETER LETS GOOOOOOO

Ngl I almost felt bad for Clun Castle on this bit HEHAHAHHAHDDHWH LIKE I KINDA RELATED TO THAT BIT WHERE YKNOW YEAH NOT BEING IMPORTANT YADAYDADYAYD THAT YEAH

OI GREEN ARROW GRENE AOREOQODID YEHAHAHAHAHDHDHHHHHH LETS GOGOO

HEHAHSHWGEGAHAHAHHDHD VERY DRAMATIC ENTRANCE AND POOR GORDON HELWPDHDHDHSHHA

YEAHAHAH EVENING STAR THEY GOT YOUR BACJ WE AINT LETTING TYDFIL DIE ON US NOW IM TELLING YOU LOT WE ARENT

Oh goah OH NO STH IS HERE *INSERT HIS THEMEAONG CAUSE IT PLAYED IN MY HEAD AS I READ HIS NAME*

Oh no.. OH GOSH CLUN CASTLE RUN. YOU GOTTA RUN FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS AND ABOVE YOU HAVE TO RUN NOW ITS FIGHT OR FLIGHT YOU MIGHT AS WELL TAKE FLIGHT SINCE THERES NO GOING BACK NO ONE AINT GONNA BE THERE DIOS

FATHER FIGURE STH HERE HES HERE EVERYONE WOOOOO YEAHAHHAHS FATHERLY TRUST LRTS GOGOGOGOODJSHF

Oh gosh OJ NO HERE WE GO WE GONNA SEE THE GDC (Gold dust constructs) BUZZ AND BRAWL WE GONNA SEE THEM GO ALL OUT

Dr Hendrick GREAT NORTHERN LOOKS CLEARLY DEAD WOULD YOU ATLEAST GIVE HIM SOME OF YOUR ATTENTION LIKE DIOS- BEHAHSHEHSHS

Ooguugughrgb Mallard poor lad:( LISTEM LISTEN THEY GOTTA FIND OUT IT WAS MS PARSONS CAUSE DIOS IM LITERALLY JUST CHEERING THEM ON TO FIND HER AND JUST GO ALL OUT

IMAGINE LIKE ROOSTER AND QUICKSILVER AND YKNOW SILVERFOX FINDING OUT LIKE COME ON OF COURSE THEY'D TEAM UP TO VERBALLY BATTLE IT OUT WITH MS PARSONS (Though I think Rooster might go physically battle it out WHO KNOWS BAHEHAHHDHSBD)

"I tried to save him. It failed. I decided to return him to his family" I WILL CRY. HERE GOES THE EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER ERVYONE THIS IS THE START STRAP ON THOSE SEATBELTS TIGHTLY

aaweeweeaaaAQEHAHDHEHEEUEUDYD GADWALL PECKING HER HAND ITS JUST OSUUDHHGGH

them THEM>>>>

YEAH NO CRAP SHERLOCK OF COURSE ITS GADWALL?? (Seriously though NEVER THOUGHT THAT HERBERT WOULDVE BEEN GADWALL THIS ENTIRE TIME LIKE BEFORE READING THIS NEW CHAPTER AS I READ THOSE CHAPTERS WITH HIM AND MALLARD IT MADE MORE SENSE THAT GADWALL WOULDVE BEEN IT)

Oh gosh OGHDOGOGOSOASAAAAAAAA

I CALLED UT IC ALLSELD ITTTTTTTTTT WELL LADIES AND GENTLEMEN AND ALL GENDERS HERES PART ONE OF THE GOLD DUST CONSTRUCT REUNION LETS GO GOGOGOGOGOGOO

DARLING PEONY DIOS- Oh god SCOT SCOT LOGOFKY AWYAY LOOK AWAY. LOOK. A. WAY. LOOK AWYA DIOS

SOMEONE SGIELD THEIR EYES THEY CANT SEE NORTH DEAD AAAAAAAAAAAAA

NONONONONONONONONOO PEONY DEAR PLEASE NONONONOONO

Rooster ROOSTER ROPAAOEDT NAOAOODIFODOOO

SCOTSMAN GET YOUR HAND SOFF HIM DIOS HE DIDNT KILL MY GOSH IM NO NOONONONONOONONONONONONONOOO

Red loqiuid.. RED NNONONONONONOOOOBOOBONONONOOOOOCONONONONOMOO SCOT YOU LIYYLE NO NONONOOBOBABS DIOS JUSKO NO THIS CNANTNO NOBOONONOOOO THIS CANT.

MALLARD BANDAGE UP YOUR HEAD YOUR LITERALLY BLEEDING. PEONY GOD SOMEONE SUPPORT PEONY RN.

Oh dios well HERE COMEA COPPERNOB- GO STEPHEN YEAH GO GOOGOGOGOGO

Wait wait HWAT STEPEHENS EH HAS A WHAT NOW. WHATATTA

JAW DROPPEDBAT THIS

GET HER OSCAR GET HER SLAM HER DOWN DO IT GOGOGOGOGOGOO DO IT KNPCK HER OUT KO HER RN

. Ms parsons YOU LITTLE AAAAZS YUP IM GONNA TUROW THIS PHONE SOON /NSRS

Wait what WHAT IS OLIVIA A GDC???? WHAT WAIT WAIT HOW. SHE LITERALLY. WAIT. SHES. WAIT. OH NVM WAIT I THINK THATS JUST MS PARSONS BEING LOKO YEAH DW DW YEAH.

YEAH YEAH GO ALL OUT OSCAR GOG GOOGOGOGO LIGHT HER UP GO YEAH YEHAHAHAHH

. oscar yknow sharing is caring SO SHOW THAT VERY UH THAT VERY CRAZY WOMAN ON HOE MAD YOU ARE DONT HOLD BACK

Ay AYAYAYAYYY AY AY MR CORBYN LETS GOGOGOGOGOOGOOO YEHAHAHAHAHH

Wait. Golden warden.. OKAY YEAH I BETTER NOTE TGAT DOWN YEAH MR CORBYN IS APPARENTKY A GOLDEN WARDEN YEAH NOTED

Oh dear lord OKAY YEAH PREPARING MYSEL

Ojay uh. DO SOME 4TH ING DR HENDRICK??? DO SOMRTHING RN LIKE ANYTHING DIOS YOU GOT GOLD DUST VILES RIGHT???? USE EHM

.

NO NO I AM NOT NO IM NOT GONNA MAKE THIS EVEN SADDER BY REMEMBERING NORTH WAS LIKE OLIVIAS FATHER NONONONONOO

No. OKAY THIA. UNO. I WAS KINDA RIGHT ON MY THEORY OF POLLY'S GOLD DUST KINDA KINDA FADING. DOS. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. MY GOA NO NO NO THIS NO. I KNOW PEONY I KNOW ITS BAD BAD.

Oh? OH??? OH THEYRE GETTING MARRIED?? THEYRE GTETTING REAL REAL MARRIED OH MY GOSH????

Ay AY AY AY AY WAIT WHAT DIOS OH GOD WHAT. HE. HES WHAT. THE TRACKS THEY. HES IN THE. MY GOSGSB

Tydfil you and me YOU AND ME TYDFIL. YOU AND ME.

Ouguguh Tydfil my gosh :(( YOU CAN TRUST THOMAS BELIEVE ME DEAR

WOOOO THIS WAS. A VERY VERY EMPTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER. NGL I GOT SURPRISED AT KING EDWARD FALLING INTO THAT BIT SO YEAH IM YEAH

Well WELL BRAVO TO REDWYVERNWRITES YET AGAIN FOR THIS FANTASTIC CHAPTER /POS

When the title said "Conflict and Revelations" IT REALLY DID MENA IT HHEHAHAHAHAHA

In all seriousness I nearly lost my words in the middle of reading it CAUSE MY BRAIN STRAIGHT UP STARTED TO LAG DUE TO THE AMOUNT OF EMOTIONS IN THIA AND HOLY WAS IT WORTH MY TIME IT REALLY WAS AMAIZNG /POS

[n3hmof1sh]

rrrraAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!!! going bird mode im gonna start screeching

wwwwhfhdlkfjvkjh ii i wanna tear myself apart limb by limb like a doll. everything feels like too much everything feels WRONG I WANT IT GONE GONE GONE GET OFFFFFFFFFFFFF

ough the urge to pull my head off of my neck and jus. just get it offfff just get everything OFF!!! im not gonna do it obv but god if it wasnt painful and didnt kill me i would do it immediately. i wish i had the anatomy of a doll or robot or smth i really just wanna pick myself apart without pain or bleeding or wtv it'd feel good

and i am CHOPPING MY FOOT OFF!! IN THE SAME WAY!!! I AM PULLING IT OFF PAINLESSLY SO I DONT FEEL IT HURTING ANYMOREEE GET OFFFFFF >:(

Duuude I have to fucking go back to school on monday ofc bc school started and i can barely walk on this foot so if it doesnt heal by monday (literally in 2 days) im gonna kmsssssss (/nsrs on the kms part)

oou now that im thinking ab it i really wanna stab myself in the stomach... with a knife... like thats an urge i get a lot. I wont bc it hurts !! and would kill me !! but idk i just rlly wish i could do it without pain or risk of death bc gawd damn it'd be nice. idk i think it's smth ab the pressure of the knife going through my skin or wtv the thought of it would be rlly nice i just dont want the pain that comes with it :'3

why is the thought of harming my body smth i want so bad yet i dont want it due to it being painful like. i think there's smth wrong with my brain or smth ._.''

ANYWAY I WANT TO TEAR MYSELF TO SHREDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS repeating myself for the 200th time i genuinely rlly wish i could just. bite and claw and scratch and stab and tear and cut and snap and break and pull apart my body without pain, like i can just put myself back together like a robot or smth.... guh maybe its smth with my sensory issues idk

mmmph. obv none of that is anything i can do irl (again for the reason of Pain and Death) but something i WOULD actually be able to do that i'd want in order to fix it is to fUCKING SWITCH WITH SOMEONE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD I JUST WANT OUT OF THIS BODY. THIS BODY FEELS WRONG WRONG WRONGGG I WANT OUT LEMME OUT. CANT SOMEONE TAKE OVER FOR LIKE A FEW HOURS??? NO APPARENTLY NOT BC OUR FUCKASS BRAIN BE LIKE NUH UH SWITCHES ARENT AVALIABLE FOR THIS SYSTEM COME BACK NEXT WEEK

dies dies dying dies i wanna suffocate myselfffffffff /nsrs

slams head on desk

ok im done now

Hbabshe that sounds like a lot to deal with...

I get these feelings a LOT so you're definitely not alone!! I... uh.... I for once dont have advice on how to ease these feelings other than stuff that includes pain, so...

But you know what? Are you able to draw? If so, try vent art!!! I find that listening to music that suits how I feel at the moment while drawing one of my blorbos going through something worse then meeee (I will not name which Blorbo but honestly you probs already know)

Honestly, this feeling is going to come down and ambush you at least TWICE in your life, so it's best to make sure you have something to distract yourself from it to make it better!!!!!

Ahahegshs I dont exactly know how to help you with the switching fronts part since, well, yknow, Im not a perma front-stuck host........ but you're going to be okay, Wayko!!! Think of when you're older!! All the stuff you can do and how you can make yourself ten times comfortable in your skin!!!! You'll be able to get top surgery!!! You'll be able to do so much once your old enough!!!! You got this Wayko!!!!!!!!!!! Everything is going to be okay, whether it's tomorrow or the next year, it's gonna turn out okay one way or another!!!!

[midnighteloquence]

watashi wa jisatsu shitaidesu

ignore whatever that means its a /nsrs

anyways! lets talk about why i no longer like friend d!

so im gonna split this rant into TWO PARTS!

Part A: things ive noticed myself/seen first hand

okay number one! they said that theyre diagnosed with bipolar, which THEY ARENT. first off, diagnosis are expensive asf no matter what youre trying to diagnose and im not being mean at all but just saying theyre on the free lunches plan soo, two diagnosis takes agessss and they just so happen to suddenly have one??

number two, theyll shit talk like everyone. i only started noticing recently that most of what comes out of their mouth is shit talk. and its fine if you have a lot to say about shitty people but then you immediately talk to them again as if you didnt just say you want to curb stomp them?? it gets confusing and ngl is really bitchy

number three! milked tf out of the fact that one of their friends said they might be autistic. which no. autism isnt something you should milk for attention!! and like the only symptoms they have are the depressive ones which USUALLY should lead you to believe that maybe you just have depression? idk im not a psychologist

on that note, they want to be a psychologist, yet doesnt understand why people act the way they do (like theyll shittalk people for things they cant fucking control) and also has rheir own problems? this would most likely be even more self destructive right? to have to solve others mental health before your own? idk im just thinking

also also they seem to care more about getting into relationships (AT THE AGE THEYRE AT) than grades which uh. yes i am literally on my knees yearning for a relationship but also at least im actually doing school and excelling academically ✌️

plus dont you gotta do good at school to be a psychologist?? thats like a really hard subject

Part B: things ive been told

this part is where it gets more blurry, since some isnt backed up (but most is dw!)

they dated C two years ago and used to do freaky shi to them at the back of the bus (make out, cuddle, touch thighs, etc), which a friend of ours i’ll call F saw first hand! um ew.

they trauma dumped on C first things first which uh

C and F would sit with each other a lot and talk alotttt because theyre both neurodivergent and nd people tend to go well and D got all pissy and like “me when my friends leave me out..” and so to shut them up (shut me up? by msi?) F told them that they might be autistic and they started milking tf out of it

told a bunch of people that C sa’d them which C did not! also told F that C’s sa story was fake and that C mentally and physically abused them (there are screenshot proof of D saying this btw!)

told people that im not autistic and that im faking it because im self diagnosed which THEY LITERALLY ARE + IVE DONE COUNTLESS HOURS OF RESEARCH ON AUTISM LEAVE ME ALONE

something ive noticed but isnt it weird that all their relationships lasted only a couple months? kinda says something

would manipulate people into taking their side by saying “oh dw its my fault not theirs!”

on that note their recent partner broke up with them AND GAVE A WHOLE ASS GOOGLE DOC ABOUT WHY WITH AMAZING EXPLANATIONS + SAYS A THOUSAND TIMES THAT IT ISNT THEIR FAULT, but C twisted it to make them the bad guy which tf he has the best moral compass of everyone ik stfu

jokes alot about substance abuse (which they do btw) but it just gets like “what am i supposed to say?”

ON THAT NOTE OF NOT KNOWING WHAT TO SAY they texted F that they tried killing themselves and F responded with an “oh” because tf are rhey supposed to say to that?? (F told me that they were literally crying when they saw that)

was a terrible friend to F, F noticed and cut off ties (good for them!! They have so much courage because i could legit never i love them for that 💪💪) and then they proceeded to send a lengthy apology which was all bs btw!

ive been told that they faked their trauma, substance abuse, and their eating disorders, but tbh im not sure if that’s true or not (considering ive seen texts theyve gotten from their mum about eating)

minor but they say theyre goth but dont even listen to the music which is the whole point! and also doesnt follow the political opinions of goth!

(did the same with punk, btw!)

not sure if true or if C said this to save their own ass but apparently D got C to shit talk me (i talked about in an earlier rant) which errr…

Secret Part C: small details

this section is in bullet points!

insulted F “jokingly” to the point they had huge gender dysphoria

thought F had a crush on their bf (at the time) when F’s literally a lesbian

not only a pathological liar but a inconsistent one!

okay this is kinda hypocritical but they follow sh blogs that show cvts

+ says the cuts are cute (which is something i dont do. i actually dont even follow them but from time to time i’ll scroll through and want to vomit /nav)

literally gave me a step by step tutorial on how to purge

not lying!

complained about their bf not kissing them in public (which is something you talk to your bf about not me! + boundaries fucking exist?)

very minor but alot of the stuff they like its mostly because it got popular on tt

will say shit like “ive only been catcalled like three times in this outfit!” which no ew + gave me a massive insecurity that im not pretty enough! choose your words wisely!

so to sum it all up theyre a terrible human being and im glad i dont talk to them anymore! thanks for reading this lengthy post!

[gamebunny-advance]

Grab Bag Doodles

Oh, it’s actually a grab bag this time instead of NSR and OC doodles! I’ve been working a lot more than usual this past week, so I haven’t had the energy to work on anything serious, but I just feel like I’ll explode if I don’t start posting at least something I’ve drawn once every few weeks, so here’s my doodles from last-last week.

1) Tabuu and Primid. Wanted to start drawing them again. I feel like I didn’t get as much out of Tabuu and his underlings as I wanted before my interests started shifting.

2) Mini Bosses. As I doodled this, I thought of a comic about how my human Tabuu, Galeem, and Dharkon seemingly have an aversion to clothes. Tabuu is like that for obvious reasons, he’s already a naked humanoid, so any clothing I gave him in this form was just for modesty. Galeem and Dharkon just don’t wear shoes because I feel like they’re more ethereal that way. I’m also trying to drop some of the religious imagery with them and make them more fantasy focused. It’s still a work in progress though.

3) Malt Shop Blue Sketch. He’s the next one up, but I’m not feeling the pose, so I’m probably gonna rework this. It doesn’t really lend itself to much interesting animation. I did however want to swap out his shades for regular glasses, so we can see his eyes through them.

4) Touhou!DJSS. I dunno, I just like the design I made for him and wanted to draw it again. It’s amazing how well DJSS lends himself to being a haughty anime girl.

5) Ex’s Meme. I’ve been wanting to do this for a while, just so my feelings about this ship are a little more clear. I actually already filled it out, but I’ll wait until I actually finish the art to say anything about it. I wanna redo the art anyway. I think it’d be funnier if they’re interacting a little more directly.

6) Sizeshifter. A joke from the “Let’s do a science!” comic that might get cut. I dunno, think it’s a little low brow, but... it’s still kinda funny. Kliff’s here because he’s helping with the experiments as a part of his community service.

--------------------

NJ + Kliff: So does it work on your pe-

DJSS: You’re both going to stop right there before I have a reason to kill you.

--------------------

7) Kun3h0 Expressions. Just working on some expressions for Kun3. I didn’t label them all, but going clockwise, starting in the upper left corner: default, excited, annoyed, despondent, shocked, disappointed. I might rework “despondent” to be a little more interesting. I like making her puffs a little expressive though. Maybe the puffs should “inflate” when she’s mad?

8) Yomi redesign. I don’t think I ever posted about them, but Yomi was the character I came up with to test how HONK works. I was never really happy with their design, but I had to push through so I could focus on learning the program rather then get caught up in the art. They’re still not great, but I like them more than I did before. I might try a human version, because I think this is just serving to prove to myself that I’m really not good at doing more anthro furry stuff yet. We’ll see though~ I’m not too attached to them, so I might design a new avatar for testing.

[amai-mochi1]

PSA none of this is cannon in the MSA and NSR. Universe!

Also if you don't know what danganronpa is its a game about high school students trapped in a school or place and forced to partake in a killing game. There's 3 games and 3-4 animes so go check em

This series will be in either Zukes point of view or Vivis point of view as they are both protagonists

🎶Prolouge🎶

The start of it all

ow...what happened?...my head hurts and I cant see anything? Am I even awake?" I thought to myself as all I could see currently was a black void, after a few minutes I could hear someone else, at first I couldn't tell who It was but then I realized it was Lewis. "Hey! Hon get up!" I heard Lewis yell out, I heard another voice and I realized it was Arthur "is she alright?..." he asked and I heard Lewis respond to him "she's alright..vivi you need to wake up!.." Vivi...is that my name? Wait yes it is! I'm Vivi the ultimate Paranormal investigator...but where am i?.." I opened my eyes and was greeted to lewis crouched down by me while Arthur was standing nearby "see i told you she was alright!" Lewis said as he looked over to Arthur. Arthur nodded and smiled seeing that I was alright. Lewis helped me up and held my hand "come on we got to go to the main hall with the others.." the main hall? Others? What was going on? Where even were we??. "Others?...wait whats going on and where are we.?" I said as I followed Lewis with arthur following behind me "yeah there's other people here, some we know and others...I have no idea who they are..as for where we are and whats going on no clue.." Lewis said as we got to the main hall. He was right though there was some people here i knew, Chloe and Duet were here, there both coworkers at my job, I also see Arthur's uncle Lance and Mystery! As soon as I saw Mystery I ran over to him and hugged him, he seemed really happy to see me and stayed in my arms, I then noticed there was a strange...woman?..thing standing near us looking at mystery with a glare. Woman is kinda what she looked like but she was green and had what looked to be a bonsi on her head. I then noticed the others here, some looked kinda bazar and others looked fairly normal. Lewis smiled and waved to them as arthur went over to lance, "were back everyone.." Lance said as another male walked over "is this everyone?" They asked Lewis and he nodded in response, arthur looked at everyone kinda nervous "soo..should we introduce ourselves or are we just going to sit here in silence?.."

I put mystery down and stood up "thats a great idea arthur! I'll go first..hello I'm vivi the ultimate Paranormal investigator! And this is my dog mystery" Lewis smiled and went next "hello. Im Lewis pepper and im the ultimate cook..." he looked over at Arthur and Arthur nodded "h-hey.. im arthur the ultimate mechanic and this..is my uncle.." Lance nodded and stood next to Arthur crossing his arms "im Lance the ultimate uncle.." the guy who was talking to lewis before walked over and a girl followed "hello every im zuke the ultimate drummer and this is ma-" she pushed him slightly "Zuke i can introduce myself thank you!..ehem hello! I'm Mayday the ultimate guitarist!!" Someone strange walked forward abit and cleared there voice "Im DJ subtonic supernova! DJ SS for short considering that's a mouthfull..." a pink mermaid perked in after him "Im sayu the ultimate mermaid!! Its so nice to meet you all!!" A noticed a little girl tug on DJ SS pants and he groaned holding her up as she smiled "hello there everyone im Yinu the ultimate pianist.." Duet and Chloe waved and both introduced themselves "hey guys..im duet im the ultimate bookshop owner and this is chloe.." Chloe waved and spoke after duet "im the ultimate cosplayer.." a tall lady crossing her arms huffed "ill go next...im Eve the ultimate artist..." another lady walked forward and was about to introduce herself when Mayday interrupted "And this kul fyra the ultimate rocks!!-" the lady pushed Mayday away and sighed "I dont go by that name or ultimate anymore!- ehem...hello I'm tatianna quartz...the Ultimate CEO..also please don't call me kul fyra.." Mayday seemed kinda upset and walked over to zuke and stood next to him crossing her arms.

Tatiana sighed and crossed her arms "now with that taken care of does anyone have a clue as to what's going on around here?...and possibly a way out of here?" Chloe nodded and pointed to a door "theres a way out of this building but there's a huge dome covering the whole place...and there's areas out there that are blocked by fencing." Duet nodded to what Chloe said and Tatiana sighed "that's not getting us very far and is a grave predicament but thank you for the info...uhm chloe.."

After Tatiana finished talking a weird voice chirped in "That is a predicament indeed!!" I looked around and saw a weird bear dog thing standing up, it looked kinda like mystery. Mystery was growling at him and it shooed him away "go away.!.." I picked mystery up and looked at it "um...who and what..are you?" I said looking at it. It looked up at me and smiled "how rude of me not to introduce myself i am MonoMyst! Nice to meetcha! I'm the principal of this fine school!"

Zuke looked at MonoMyst confused "principal...? School im already confused.." MonoMyst smiled and jumped onto a stool "then let me illuminate for you! You lucky 15 people have been chosen for a special program! This school and the world given to outside is where you'll live for the rest of your lives!. I looked at MonoMyst confused "rest of our lives? What do you mean??" Everyone else looked at him and started talking to him and each other confused as MonoMyst Clapped "well there's food and supplys here as well as entertainment, and as most of you have probably already seen no exits!" Lance visibly got angry and pointed at him "Who do you think you are?! You can just force us to leave here!" MonoMyst slapped his hand away and Arthur had to pull him back "well ive already said im MonoMyst and you don't have to live here, you can actually leave if you finish a simple task, and that simple task is to kill someone!" Everyone went silent and stared at MonoMyst before sayu spoke up "kill someone?.." MonoMyst looked down then pulled out a microphone "can you guys not hear me very well? Yes I said you have to kill someone.. You are in MusicRoads life of killing program after all! If you want out of this place all you gotta do is off one of your fellow participants..and if someone doesn't die in the next 48 hours ill present a motive! But until then look around and get an idea of the place where you'll be spending the rest of your lives!!" He jumped back and ran off out of the room. A killing game?.. this is crazy..were stuck in a place with no exits and no way out...What are we going to do?

🎶End of Prolouge🎶

Holy cow ive never written this much but I hope you all enjoy this! Its alittle wonky and nothing like a book as this is my first time doing this so yeah!

Feel free to use the chart to put what you think who is who id love to see also if you get really into this know I have school and that It might take a while to add more parts.

[gamebunny-advance]

Huh

I started writing a script for another NSR comic about 1010, but it just got kinda sad and writing it is bumming me out. It’s not finished, but I sunk too much time into it for me to just throw it out. This isn’t fanfic, it’s an unedited comic script and is almost entirely dialogue. It really doesn’t read well, but maybe y’all will get something out of my ramblings anyway.

Note: The script calls them by their hair colors, but they refer to each other by a number: White=1, Red=2, Blue=3, Yellow=4, Green=5. Neon J refers to them by the fanon names.

(It's a peaceful afternoon. 1010 is taking a break in a rec room in the Barrac Mansion. Green is slumped over on an exercise ball. Yellow is laid down next to Green. White and Red are playing cards. Blue is reading a book.)

Green: So, are we supposed to be brothers, or are we just 5 guys who live in the same house? White: If it wasn't programmed into us, then it doesn't matter. Yellow: Yeah, why are you worried about that anyway Number 5?

(Green has a flashback of coming face-to-face with another Green 1010)

Green: The other day I ran into one of my duplicates. When I looked at it, I thought, "this is me" and just went about my day, but when I look at you guys I think, "this is not me" and that's it. It's weird that something like that is so vague in our memory. Yellow: You do have a point. All that's programmed is that we're all "1010", but I guess that could mean anything. White: Let's just drop it. Knowing that isn't going to change anything. Green: True, but I think it'd be fun to talk about. Red: Sure, I'll bite. Since we're made by the same person, then we'd be brothers right? White: You wouldn't call a fridge and a toaster "brothers" just because they're from the same manufacturer, would you? Blue: I wouldn't call those related at all, but we're all in the same series, so we're obviously supposed to be a set. We might as well be brothers at that point. White: Being a set doesn't make us brothers. A set of cards all belong together, but they're not all the same. Cards can share numbers and suits...

(White picks out the Joker from his hand of cards.)

White: ...or nothing at all.

Green: Why do you keep comparing us to "things". I know we're not "human", but we're still people man. People work differently from "things". White: We are what we are and what we are is manufactured. We can't apply "human" logic to our situation. Blue: Are you alright Number 1? You've been acting weird ever since the BBJ incident. White: I'm fine. I just don't think we're brothers. Am I not allowed to have a different opinion? Red: It's fine man, you're just getting a little aggressive. You're supposed to be the "chill" one, remember? White: I'll be whatever I'm told to be, but I'm not going to be what I'm not, okay?? If it's not written in our code or given as an order, then it doesn't matter.

(All fall silent. Blue, Red, Green, and Yellow turn to each other and nod. All stand up from their current positions, dropping whatever they were holding. White looks surprised.)

Red: Okay it's time for: All -White: OPERATION: CHILL OUT White: Huh?

(The four pick up White and begin to run out of the mansion with him all while he's flailing around trying to get free. They get to their backyard and toss White into the pool.)

White: Are you trying to short-circuit me?!

(The four look down on White from the edge of the pool, arms crossed.)

Blue: It's about time you tell us what's going on. White: I told you nothing is wrong with me. Yellow: Then why were we able to throw you in there? Green: You should have seen this coming if you were still on the network. White: ... Red: Number 1, why did you desync? Is there something you don't want us to know about? White: ...

Blue: You can give us the silent treatment all you want, but we're not letting you out of there until you explain yourself. Red: Whether we're brothers or not, we're still welded from the same sheet metal. Yellow: We're here to support each other no matter what. We'll hear you out, even if it's something difficult to say. Green: We'll even keep it secret from the captain if we have to. White: ...I'll talk. Just let me out of here. It takes too much energy to stay afloat.

(The four nod and pull out White by the hands. White drains the water from his extremities. They stand opposed.)

White: I just don't like the idea of us being brothers. Blue: Do you not like us or something? Red: C'mon, we said we'd hear him out. White: It's because it'd hurt too much. Yellow: What would hurt? White: After the incident, something pierced my chest and began to hurt. I kept looking for whatever was causing the pain, but my diagnostic always passed without error. But it kept getting worse. It got so bad that I started producing distress signals, so I desynced to keep you all from finding out. Green: Why wouldn't you tell us that?! If you're making distress signals then something is seriously wrong! Yellow: We should probably get you to Neon J right now. White: Don't bother. I don't... want to see him. Red: What? What's your problem with the captain? White: I don't...know. Red: C'mon, just resync with us. We'll have an easier time figuring this out if you let us see it ourselves. White: ...I can't. I just... can't right now. It doesn't matter. It's nothing you all need to know about anyway. Red: This is going nowhere. Number 3 and 4, go find the captain. Number 5 stay here with me and 1.

All: Affirmative.

White: I told you I'm fine. Stop worrying about me.

***

(White has been placed on what looks an examination table surrounded by several monitors. Several cords are connected to his opened chest cavity. Neon J sits nearby White and a computer, observing the reports.)

Neon J: It's just like you said, you're not pulling up any errors but you're producing some very urgent distress signals that aren't actually being sent. It's like you're sending them to yourself. White: ... Neon J: *Sigh* The others told me what you said. I am very concerned about your condition. White: ...They said they wouldn't tell. Neon J: ...Rin. White: Don't call me that. A machine doesn't need a name like that. Neon J: What has you thinking that you're just a machine? You know that you're more than that. You're a person Rin. White: People can't be replaced with just the push of a button.

Neon J: ... I heard that you all were debating if you were brothers or not. I thought that was funny. White:... Neon J: I left that detail out so you all could decide that for yourselves. I didn't know how close you all would wind up being, whether you'd look at yourselves as mere comrades or best friends. I never would have imagined that you'd go so far to call each other brothers. If I'd known your AI would evolve like that, I wouldn't have left it so open-ended. Being so close... is only going to give you heartache. White: ... Neon J: Do you hate me Rin? For making you? White: ...I don't know. When I look at you I start feeling angry, but I don't know why. It's like these feelings aren't mine. I don't know... what's happened to me. Neon J: I see. Your syncing function is supposed to keep you all in harmony. The more you understand each other, the more you can function as a complete unit. But you're not just synced to each other. You're also synced with me. Whatever signals you send out get sent to me too, but it also works the other way around. White: ...but I've never heard your thoughts. Neon J: You have, you just don’t notice it. The signals I send back are just general reports about my location and condition so you all can find your way back to me. I can also send orders that way. But... you're a little bit different Rin. Neon J: Each of you was assigned a role in your squad. You of course are the leader, so you have a few extra functions to help you fill that role. Namely, you're more in sync with me than the others so you can react quicker to my incoming orders. White: ... Neon J: Part of that is that my emotional state gets transferred to you too.

(Neon J hangs his head low and squeezes his fist into his opposite hand.)

Neon J: I'm sorry. You're like this... because of me. White: ...But why? Neon J: After the incident, I was scared that I wouldn't be able to bring you back. It hurt so much knowing that I failed to protect you. I felt like I was about to lose everything again. To keep it from hurting I had to stop thinking of you as "people". You had to be machines so I didn't have to deal with the guilt of you getting killed on my watch. If I could accept that you were disposable, then it wouldn't matter if you'd all died because I could rebuild you. That's pretty terrible right? Not the kind of thing you'd want to hear from your captain. I felt so ashamed for even having thought that. I haven't been able to forgive myself all this time. White: So this hate... Neon J: It's probably my own self-loathing. I'm pretty sure part of me wants you to hate me. I don't have the right to your respect anymore, not after thinking something like that.