#i think the funniest part about the last image is that i literally mentioned nothing about their ship or anythign romantic

[philzokman]

GIGGLING SO HARD RN CHATGPT SHIPS SKK REAL FHDSJKAHF

[safyresky]

Frostmas Year 4: Behind the Scenes

Prologue | Y1 | Y2 | Y3 | Y4 | Y5 | Y6 | Y7 | Y8 | Y9 | Y10 | Y11 | Y12

[To Read Frostmas: From the TOP on ao3 | ff dot net]

This'll be an interesting one to cover, given that I'm doing it while prepping for a cross-post which ultimately led to a full on rewrite 🤪🤪

So let's get into it! Year 4: Behind the Scenes, twenty twenty four edition >:)

Intro: OLD VERSION

My first thought that has me CACKLING I actually posted about IMMEDIATELY upon opening it for a reread lmao. An AN apologizing for a 7k word chapter lmao. I think these days that's a SMALL chapter by Dani standards!

It is now a whopping 12k. Pre second read through. Which is occurring as I edit this draft.

Here at safyresky industries, we are nothing but verbose✨

RIGHT SO. OLD VERSION

The old version is very fresh post-OG CS, tbh. Jacqueline mentions how she and B-Man became friends BECAUSE of this universe, right? Okay, well, they got on so well I was like "there's no WAY they've JUST become friends. They act like they've known each other forEVER"

So I changed that halfway through Frostmas, went back to edit a couple bits, and when I rewrote CS again, had it become more evident--especially with posting "When Bernard Met Jacqueline" halfway through this process, which was very much me just trying to figure out how friendship they are

The answer, it turns out, is yes. Very friendship

SO while cross-posting to ao3 we WILL be tweaking the "baby's first friend" thing

Can you believe when I initially created Jacqueline, she had no friends? fucking WILDIN. She's the friendliest bitch ALIVE. She gets along with the god damn BOOGEYMAN (in my head that is, lol, but given that I am fully referring to lmelodie's OC here, they obvi would be the boss there!)

(but Jacqueline in my head is like "I am making friends with this scraggily ass mother fucker)

ANYWAY.

Another old bit that I'm thinking of yeeting involves Jacqueline's comment on humans? It was a bit of foreshadowing for another story I was thinking of that'd've come after Into the Shadows, in which a chaotic entity of some sort manages to move ACTUAL LIVE HUMANS into Crystal Springs, the magical continent. BUT given that now it's not humans vs magical creatures but magibeans, magihumans, and ordibeings, this bit is super outdated and ALSO, given the collaborative nature round these parts, I...actually don't think I'll be WRITING this idea EVER, lmao

It was a Jack love interest story 100% but now I'm like "...nah" about it, lol

Tho the original idea of a human that knows of and teaches about magibeans moving to CS/finding themselves there is still very intriguing and gd funny

All the magibeans are perplexed. The Assembly is like "well,,,,it's not not allowed?? We never banned it? HOW did they even GET HERE"

So YEAH, there's your two interesting facts for the OLD INTRO

Intro: NEW VERSION

Blaise, Jacqueline, and Fiera have gnarly tempers. Jacqueline is ever so jealous they can literally explode things.

I have been heavily vibing the little brief peeks into when Jacqueline was asking Jack all about his take on Frostmas and I thought the one in Y3 would be the last one

But then I re-read the intro

And. Well. HERE WE ARE.

I actually really liked this one! It's been lots of fun picturing the Frostmas Asides part of Frostmas so far--hence the increase in these little blips and the Blinter aside I have in drafts that I will unleash. At some point. It takes place during Frostmas Y3, lol.

Idk I just really like examining how these mofos function, given the past and reformed villainy and such. WRITING IS FUN.

I may need to scrimbly this because it is the funniest fucking mental image I have given myself in a hot minute:

That had made him laugh, which was nice to see. I’d been grilling him for like, six days at this point—on the job, at home, as he was trying to enjoy a morning coffee in the silence of his condo, watching the lovely flurry outside when the little flurry herself barged in with more questions at eight in the goddess-damned morning.

I am absolutely WHEEZING about it, it's giving HOLY FROST MOM vibes lol

"You are the goddess's biggest idiot" another absolute banger of a line

BERNARD! :D. Idk why but I'm just really here for soft and no nonsense B-Man. I just LOVE writing him actually caring about the other elves it just. It SLAPS. It FEELS RIGHT. Yes he snaps sometimes and seems a lil' grumpy in tsc 1 (I mean, I would be too dealing with Scott), BUT HE IS A BIG OLD SOFTY IN MY BOOKS WHO LOVES THE ELVES AND LOVES HIS JOB AND SHOULD LEGALLY BE GIVEN A WEAPON AND ALLOWED TO DO A MURDER I THINK

ANYWAY. HOW DOES JACQUELINE DO BE KNOWING.

I have explanations for all of it in place, but those won't be revealed until Y12. SO, in the meantime, I had Jacqueline explain our logic so far in the LEAST spoilery way possible, and that is why this whole passage exists, lol.

Jacqueline hating on Santa Scott is 100% my bad, post-series

It is also me projecting! I am in the same camp as Jacqueline when it comes to "people who have wronged friends". My love language is VIOLENT THREAT aka, IT'S THE THREAT THAT COUNTS 💖

It was also my way of keeping Jacqueline's comment on ordibeings being in CS in without it coming off as like, anti-human propaganda or smth lol (see the foreshadowing an ex-story comment above!)

"And considering what happened to him [B-Man]…well, I think it's better that way."

So THAT was my first stab at foreshadowing what happens to B-Man in (checks calendar) Year Eight! I made them as vague as possible bc we don't know what happened to Bernard between tsc2 and tsc3--that is, we DIDN'T.

BUT I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THE SERIES IS CANON!

Anyway, I tried to make it as vague as possible on purpose bc I wanted to keep everyone guessing >:) and MAYBE make them think I killed off B-Man 🤭🤭🤭

GUESS WE'LL HAVE TO WAIT FOR YEAR 8 TO FIND OUT! ;D

Also. I should REALLY crosspost "When Bernard Met Jacqueline" like. STAT

Scene 1: MN's visit

I have SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE. A lot on the subject of old vs new, tbh!

Right, so, in the OG. MN felt SO MEAN.

And I have this thing. this very particular thing about MN's character and characterization, specifically.

I get SO MAD when people make her SO MEAN FOR NO REASON. I have seen so many bad takes where she's just the worst, an absolute bitch, super rude and unfriendly and I'm like? Mother Nature? Mother Freakin Nature???

Like SURE OKAY. FUCK WEATHER. THAT SHIT SOMETIMES DOES NOT SLAP!! But come ON. She's Mother Nature! Yeah she's scary and THE literal force of nature, but why just that? Why shouldn't she be kind and caring? PLENTY OF MOMENTS IN THE MOVIES WHERE SHE APPEARED SHE WAS GENTLE AND SOFT SPOKEN. COME ON!

AH.

Needless to say. As I was prepping this for crosspoting, I reread MN asking Jacqueline to use her connection and went "SHE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY OR DO THAT"

She would RESPECT BOUNDARIES! AS WE ALL SHOULD!

And I've just come out of like 5 years worth of boundaries being trampled ALL OVER so I was very not here for it so, naturally, I changed that shit RIGHT UP. RIGHT UP. AH!

I thought it'd be hard to restructure Jacqueline's reaction, but it TURNS OUT after the YEAR I'VE HAD it was quite was and made sense for her to immediately jump the gun, as it were, and get herself all worked up bc I have been doing this for a solid year and a half at this point so. y'know. FELT.

Poor girl's been in Fight mode for a solid 4 years at this point! She's just trying to survive! It's no WONDER she explodes that easily

Jacqueline: I can't explode :(

Also Jacqueline: explodes ~✨emotionally✨~

I've also found, revisiting Frostmas post CS rewrite and MtF clean up and 10 years of development on the cast of characters here had me looking at how I characterized WINTER and going WELL THIS IS WRONG

So she's...not as sad and despondent and holding Jacqueline at arms length

Instead, she is doing her best to be there for Jacqueline while also not being overbearing bc she very much does NOT want a repeat of number 1 with number 2!! ah!

They're all trying not to step on each other's toes and they aren't even in the SAME ROOM

THE BELL THING! It's how I hc they call meetings! Slash how the CS versions do it :)

They all have a tiny little bell that works as an e-mail, lol. You pick it up, which activated it, give it your message/meeting deets, and then give it a little ring! It sends the message to the other bells, and the other Legendaries get it, and they meet up at the place of the person who called it--unless otherwise specified.

I imagine they have specific yearly meetings that take place on or around the same time, and the bells are used to update meetings or call emergency ones! :)

I've no idea where I got the idea from but it's giving Polar Express, isn't it? 🤔🤔🤔

I'm getting the sense I may have to make a list of aliases for Blaise a la the one I have for Jacqueline. So far we've got about 70 variations of the phrase "hottie hot hottie" courtesy of Winter, fiery dilf courtesy of my husbando, baby cleaner extraordinaire, and now, apparently carpet steamer, too!

I quite enjoy picturing the Frosts using their elemental proficiency for mundane things. Like starting fires (IN THE FIREPLACE/HEARTH!), Dishes. Cleaning carpets, apparently 🤣

"I've half a mind to lightning bolt the next person who brings it up" YES MN. MUCH BETTER. GO OFF! I wrote this then pictured EB becoming a giant poof ball and wheezed, so it stayed 😎

"And you should hear this too, mom" is deffs a reference to that meme lol. It's been in my head as of late :p. Pedro Pascal is an enjoyable human being tbh!

God. Having Jacqueline be allowed to swear in the narration was like. My BEST idea. FEELS GOOD. FEELS RIGHT. SHE'S A POTTY MOUTH. Probably the worst of her siblings. Yes, even Fiera!

Mmmmm well maybe not QUITE. I think Fiera comes close but Jacqueline takes the damn cake lol

Scene 2: "You Look Like Sleet, B-Man"

They both do tbh, lmao, who're you fooling, Jacqueline 😏😏

Have you guys ever read Just An Elf by Locrain-Mode over on fanfiction dot net? I strongly recommend you do. The BEST Bernard characterization I EVER did see exists in the series of oneshots and it is 100% how I inform my characterization of B-Man.

ESPECIALLY in Frostmas tbh!!

Crystal Springs FACT: Jacqueline dislikes puns. A lot. There is one (1) exception she'll make and I'll keep that close to my chest for a rainy day ;)

Anyway, focusing on the behind the scenes stuff now: Bernard calling Jacqueline "Jacquie" is 100% me inflicting pain on shittyelfwriter on purpose bc we're friends and i love her, lol

I ALSO love angst! And what, indeed, is up with Elle during Frostmas? where's she at?

We'll find out year 12 ;)

But you can see WHY it gave Jacqueline hope--for a brief moment she lived in a world where maybe Bernard remembered--which would make this whole situation like, wayyyyy smoother and easier to take care of for the both of them tbh!

So of course, we CAN'T have that!

Anyway I really love Jacqueline and B-Man's friendship. And they both deserve some floor time. And yes, I 100% meant to end this scene with Jacqueline giving these vibes:

huehuehuehuehue >:3

Scene 3: MEETING TIME

Oh, Council meetings. I'm sure they made the ribbing in the movie as a one off joke, espesh since it is. y'know. a very old person kinda joke, but I quite enjoy it!

Anyway, throwing Jacqueline into the Council Meeting gave me the utmost glee bc I got to dial up her frosty-ness, bordering her on Jack territory and given everything she'd JUST told Bernard, I was CACKLING as I put this blorbo through the ringer >:)

It does foreshadow how things go later what with her frosty attitude! ehehe >:)

I'm actually applauding myself as I reread/edit/tweak/rewrite. I really was laying it in for Year 10's big reveal, eh? >:D

"If Two-ie over here would just look into his mind..." <- A fun lil' nickname for Jacqueline given that she is the Second Jack Frost. Two-ie? Two-y? You get it lol

SUBLIME. Barbie movie is, apparently, still on the brain lol.

And Jacqueline is once again ruining furniture by way of losing control of powers slightly! I love when she does that >:)

AND JACK'S GRAND ENTRANCE! The bit about him moving the frost instead of Jacqueline is a new edition and I love it.

YEAH! MAKE EACH OTHER SUFFER! REMIND HIM AGAIN THAT HE CAN'T DO HIS USUAL SLEET, MWAHAHAHA

And VOILA! The Resort...BEGINS. Well, almost!!! I mean, in the movie Jack himself says he started out doing the job as is but found it to be too much work--and making a theme park like THAT? I think it'd take a little bit more time, especially with such a huge operations shift. so! Year Four the idea is revealed!

FRANCHISING. IDK WHY I DIDN'T THINK OF IT UNTIL NOW, TEN ISH YEARS LATER!!! Imagine an AU where they DID franchise and all of the Council Members now had their realms open as theme parks slash resorts?? like. WHAT would make them AGREE TO THAT

I feel like at this point my Frostmas mantra is "how can I make this WORSE"

"COOKIES are DELICIOUS!" Crystal Springs FACT: Jacqueline has a MAHOOSIVE sweet tooth. She's more partial to cakes and cupcakes, but a good cookie is a good cookie, y'know?

AND THEN SHE GETS KICKED OUT OF THE MEETING. ICONIC.

“You’ve got a kill count?” “Bernard, I was a pirate. But shenanigans aside, I’m a whole entire season. I’m sure that thousands of people have died from like, hypothermia or exposure during a storm I ushered in.” “Pretty sure that that’s not on you.” I pouted. “Well maybe I want to have a kill count!” “Oh, well, in that case, don’t let me ruin your fun.”

Please, they're so FUNNY. I think I added about 3k words to this chapter upon crossposting? And it was all added dialogue, like this

I am but the vessel. These fuckers stole the wheel a long, long time ago

"...and a whole lot of aggression to misplace" fun fact: this is 100% a Danny Phantom reference that has lived rent free in my head since I was TEN, PROBABLY. He's pissed about something then the box ghost is all BEWARE and Danny's like "😏😏 heLLO MISPLACED AGGRESSION!"

Idk why it stuck with me, but it did! We're not going to read into/psychoanalyze that! :D

AND BOOM, I HIT YOU WITH THE ENDING LINE!

I think it hit better before, but tbh it needed a bit of finagling given how the story has progressed since I originally wrote this chapter. I deffs think it plays into the bigger picture better like this! And tbh, that's good enough for me :3

Not as many memes or references to real world shit in this one. I guess I was having a chill time when I originally posted it? It was very fun to rewrite it! I've forgotten how fun it is to pit the cold front against one another in this timeline~

Enjoy the BTS! And enjoy the FRESHLY UPDATED Frostmas: Year Four here on ao3 and on ff dot net like, tomorrow ish! 💖

[aphrodite-would-be-proud]

omg so I read this manga this morning called Sesame Salt and Pudding and it’s ab this 22 y/o girl who gets drunk and accidentally marries a stranger, who happens to be 42. it’s the cutest lil slice of life just a really healthy relationship and all i could think was this would be the funniest meet cute for Erwin.

Thanks for linking me the manga website anon omfg you're a real one💙🐛

Alright so below is my 1am thoughts while reading it as i listen to a daddy/mommy issues playlist i found online and drinking green apples monster energy.

Tw: mentions of sex | Tw: suggestive words

Chapter one

The girl is really pretty, I'm really gay.

Wait so she married him while drunk and now can't remember anything?

This lowkey does look like Erwin without gel in his hair

...why can i see Erwin as the type of drunk to not only sign a wedding registration paper but also demand both of you must go get wedding ware, paying for your dress or suit.

Consent 👏yes👏100%👏the bare minimum👏Erwin values consent above literally anything else👏Erwin wouldn't touch you without permission even while drunk out of his mind👏again it's the bare minimum👏

An older dude that cooks & cleans while staying home as i go out and provide for us? This is my dream. Stay at home husband Reiner stay at home husband Reiner stay at ho

Ngl i think Erwin wouldn't know anything past basic cooking despite him reading all these cooking books and watching videos, i think if he really was dedicated he'd sign up for a cooking class go get high level skills just to impress you but treat it like it's nothing

...he didn't wanna stare at her chest so he went to clean the fridge- Erwin would def be that kind of gentleman to change his own attitude instead of ever telling you to change or cover up.

I love her job oh my god yes.

Ooo a love rival huh👀 is this gonna turn into a triangle situation

The only love rival I'd ever see for Erwin is Nile tbh, like i think if it was Miche, Hange or Levi then he'll talk it out and either him or the person backs off.

He gets gloomy when jealous huh~

THIS IS FUNNIER THAN IT HAS ANY RIGHT TO BE DOAKDJKAKSN I CAN'T.

I can't even imagine Erwin's reaction if you said this to him, like he won't even be mad he would just be really taken back, standing there like 🧍🏼‍♂️...he'd even be amused.

Okay- okay this is a good reaction...I think Erwin would say something similar but rephrase it to he more subtle yet somehow making it sound dirtier.

Something along the lines of, "well, if you're so sure then why don't you find out yourself."

And "after all i can't deny that i haven't thought about how beautiful looked last night...how the more beautiful you would've looked laying down."

"You looked like a really delicious treat"

"All pretty and alone, tearing about your worries, i just wanted to make you forget them all and leave the rest to me"

I should stop-

Chapter two

HE SAID HE IS HER UNCLE I CAN'T BREATHE I LOVE THIS

Oh shit he overhead them oh shit

Shit is going down oh god

Man if it was Nile in this hypothetical insert then he'd be hold this information like the petty bitch he is and use it at the date instead.

Chapter three

Ngl dude, i really hate it when they treat it like a women's reputation is all she has. I especially hate the purity culture of that a young women can't be a roommate with a man because "what will people say" like...if they're fucking who cares and if they aren't literally who cares? Do they realise gay people exist too and two women have an equal chance of sleeping together too?

It feels like they treat women as children, maybe I'm just projecting bc i live in a similar kind of culture where all these rules apply here if not more.

Anyway that manga is cute, it just angred me that these two men think they're responsible for solving her problem or as if they have any right to scold her or be angry like she's some kind of child and should listen.

It's her life, it's her problem and it's her who will solve it.

DUDE SHUT THE FUCK UP. he's really acting like a bitch as if he has any right to be angry or even judge her oh my god.

"Impure background..." Get fucked.

The only ONLY reason he even can be angry is because she didn't mention being married while they were going for a date but they didn't even go on that date and nothing was official so why does she have to tell him her private life.

RED FLAG RED FLAG RED FLAG HUGE RED FLAG

"get divorced immediately" HUGE FUCKING RED FLAG

Controlling Insecure cunt.

I'm sorry anon that I'm really going off on him and I'm sorry if you like him- it's just that i really really can't stand these things

THE MANGA IS LOVELY THO THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR RECOMMENDING IT I'D LOVE MORE WHENEVER💜

Oh baby, oh angel I'm so sorry you had to go through that, in no way is it ever right to get angry and yell no matter what especially since you apologised and admitted to your mistake.

Especially since he knew it was something you did while drunk and deeply regret it but he still took out his angry on you like you betrayed his trust when you weren't even together or like you intentionally did it.

Narcissistic dick.

I'm not talking about the next scenes because it might be triggering.

Chapter five

4 is missing :( idk how her parents visit went

We just started the chapter and-

Fuck her. Like what's up with toxic abusive people being too comfortable saying these things lmao like they actually take themselves seriously omfg.

Imagine saying this about Erwin tho, like it feels powerful to say. John maloney was right after all huh

Oh

Oh

So we doing this huh

👀

....oh :( we were just getting to the god part, man Erwin wouldn't have let a phone stop him.

Also bless the translator for their note at the end, it's good we're seperating fiction from reality and clarifying things to people on how to act in these scenarios.

Like drama is fun and all, I'm a huge sucker being extra, but things are different in real life and using fiction as a guide to how to deal with these, clearly written to be extra, situations should never ever be anyone's first choice.

Well that's all the 10 images tumblr will allow me in one post, i hope you had fun anon because i sure did! And i can definitely see this as a sweet wholesome Erwin/reader story, and if i ever did a an inspired rewriting of that manga with Erwin i can definitely see it being really fun to write!

Although i will change some stuff like that guy, i know people have good and bad sides but the guy specifically made me uncomfortable for personal reasons, i also Don't like mentioning serious things like anger controlling issues without diving deep into them.

Imma go finish the manga, if you want a part two, or have a different thing to recommend, please let me know💙

[youremyonlyhope]

Starship Rewatch

10 years ago today (well, yesterday since I’m posting it a day later), 15 year old Hope curled up on her couch to watch a new StarKid show called Starship right as it dropped. This was the first time I got to watch a show when it was posted since I didn’t become a StarKid fan until a months earlier. I was so excited.

And now, I’m rewatching Starship for the first time in full in at least 5 years I think. I listened to the soundtrack twice earlier today, singing along at my desk at work (thank god no one else was here tonight to judge me). I still know so many of the lyrics. And so many little jokes and stuff were flooding back. Starship was my favorite StarKid show for a long time, so I’m so excited to watch this again to see if it’s still my fave.

This post ended up being really long, so you’ve been warned. But it also includes pictures of the crocheted Roach and Bugette plushies that I made as a teen.

OH. THE OLD LOGO. AHHH. I already have so many feels. The future is now! I can’t handle this. The nostalgia! The Galactic League of Extraterrestrial Exploration. My facebook account to this day says I am a Starship Ranger at the G.L.E.E. because I’ve never bothered to change it. Also, shoutout to anyone from the StarKidPotter FB and EFST days if you’re reading this. AHHH IT’S CHRIS AND ERIC. Ok I might have to pause 20 thousand times during this Starship Ranger ad to acknowledge all the StarKid cameos. Tyler! “We come to conquer... in peace!” Tyler I love you. Brian and Richard! I forgot they painted Richard BLUE. Britney and Ariel! Nicholas Joseph Stauss-Matathia! I see that StarKid’s website has shortened his name to just Nicholas Strauss but remember the days when we’d purposefully say his full name? Anyway, I literally just screamed “NICK” when I saw him because he was always one of my faves. The Old Snatch was and still is iconic. Devin and Lily! The Wizard God himself, AJ Holmes. God... remember those AJ Holmes appreciation days where we’d make Chuck Norris-like memes about AJ? So much is rushing back from the depths of my mind oh my god... It’s been so long yet it feels like yesterday... “Someone really *static* F- *static* -ucked up big time” Love it.

2 minutes and 22 seconds in. I’ve written so much. I had to pause before Joey started singing to take a moment. I love this show so much. I love these goofballs so much. And they’re all so young. Most of them are younger than I am now. This is insane.

Ok I have to promise myself not to pause as much now. *Spoiler, I failed*

“I’ll fight off this gamma radiation if it’s the last thing I ever do!... We’re going down! This is the last thing I’ll ever do!” Oh my god. Look at baby Joey. He hasn’t even graduated from college yet. And that Bug puppet! Someone remind me to dig up the pictures of my crocheted plushies of Starship puppets since I made Roach and Bugette and gave them to the StarKids at SPACE and Apocalyptour. (I also did Rumbleroar, but the bugs were my own pattern I made so I was more proud) The camera is focused in on Bug instead of Joey’s face. I love it. So much. Brannnttttttt. My god. Am I gonna freak out over every single entrance? Roach pretending to die, he’s the best friend ever. “The needs of the many bugs outweigh the needs of the few bugs.” “Or the one bug, I know.” Oh man, when that line comes back... “Dirt eater” “Exoskeleton polisher” “I wanna build honeycombs” “The bug that ruins your picnic” “A fly on the wall!” That line came back to me earlier today and I died. Remembering that line was like 50% of the reason I listened to the soundtrack today.

Nick Lang! Julia! LAUREN LOPEZ. THERE SHE IS. Lovebugs, I can’t. *Sentimental music* “You could come over to my nest and I could... tear off your head and let my larva devour your body?” How did I forget that line? The way Lauren has to kick Bugette’s larva sack to walk. But the way that it also works so well with the character. I can’t. The Mosquito Brothers!! I forgot they show up so early. “This is our sister, Sweetheart” “...YO.” I CANNOT HANDLE JIM POVOLO. The “zzzz”s like buzzing as backing vocals instead of the usual “ahs” and “oohs.” The things you don’t appreciate until years later. Darren, you genius. That is such a good detail. For a second I couldn’t remember who the Overqueen is played by. 99% sure it’s Jim (It is). Also. Overqueen like ovary... and it looks like a giant vagina. That had to be pointed out to me later. “FLATTERY WILL GET YOU... everywhere.” Why did I forget that line too? “I’m a starship ranger” “Quiet you, you’re drunk” “No I’m drunk!” I remembered that line probably like... 2 minutes earlier when I noticed Joe huddling in the background and realized that line was coming up. The way Joey lets go of the puppet so both he and the puppet walk away with their arms limp... so cute.

Before even pressing play on part 3, I can hear February saying “Let the record show I am super ahead of schedule.” and I’m dying. I forgot about Brian as the escape pod. Denise Donovan! That Star Trek prop. I’m dumb so I can’t remember if it’s a communicator or what. But I know my Uhura Barbie had a mini one that I lost within a month probably. “OxyGen” “Schience” I can’t. “Mission Log... I think I just heard a spooky noise.” How am I forgetting all of these amazing lines? “Pika-pi!” AHHH I JUST SCREAMED. “My stars, I seemed to have landed in a field of these aMiNals!” I can’t. “Can I tell you guys something?” *port de bras and falls gently to the ground* “Hello!” “TOTORO!” I’m dead. The balloon mechanism on the mosquitos! I forgot about that! “HOLY SHIT IT’S A BUUUUGGGGG” Ok something I noticed but didn’t mention earlier. The bug puppet that Joe uses when he says “I had my heart set on nourishment” is the same one red and pink one that Julia used when talking about wanting to be nourishment. When Julia actually gets eaten, she’s using a different bug puppet, the green and pink one, but the same character voice. So, I can’t tell if they intentionally had her play 2 bugs so Joe could be one of them later, or if it was a mistake. I might also just be overthinking things. “ME THINKS IT WENT THAT-A-WAY” I cannot handle Jim Povolo. That scream Joe does as he slimes her. Woah I originally wrote “There seems to be no signs of intelligent lifeforms anywhere” earlier and then deleted it since I don’t know why I found it remarkable. And then looking at the comments of this part I see someone mentioned a Toy Story reference. So that’s why that line stuck out to me. Aww StarKid. There are so many Disney references in this show.

THERE SHE IS. THERE’S MY GIRL TAZ. The pew pew effects how could I forget that!  “Hey Taz. You’re pretty tough for a chick.” “I was just going to say the same thing about you.” “Woahhhhhhhh” JoMo oh my god. “My spectrometer readings are off the wazooooooo” That line kills me. Why am I JUST NOW noticing, 10 years later, that Tootsie enters this scene with his gun facing the wrong way. Oh my god. “I saw the empirical proof that science killed god. It’s comforting to know he was once alive though. I like to think that when he died, he went to heaven.” Oh Tootsie Noodles. “...What the hell kind of name is that?” “He’s got bear hands??” Why do I forget all of these lines??!? That record scratch and freeze frame to go “BOOOOOO” oh my god I forgot that. “Like the other day, he was in the cafeteria, just cah-rying in front of everybody.” BOOOOOOO. Here we go, Taz’s amazing Up monologue. “And when Up, cuts an onion, the ONION is the one who cry.” HELP. Also 99% sure I used that joke for AJ appreciation at least one year. “Now take a walk off my knife” What a line. So awesome. I remember having a profile pic on FB that was the text of that monologue and the image of Lauren screaming “WALK IT OFF” I’m still convinced that first “WOO” from the audience that we hear when Up enters is Darren. “I do not peepee sitting down” “Huh??” JoMo’s face as if he’s trying his hardest not to laugh and I can’t tell if that’s him breaking character or if Krayonder is actually trying not to laugh. “I peepee like big boy, deadgoddamnit. So stop making fun of me because it hurts my feelings” I’m dying. Also, deadgoddamnit is amazing. “if you don’t go out there and die for something, then I will kill you for nothing.” I remembered the mirror scene, just seconds before it started and already started laughing. “You’re not a failure, overall.” “Allow me to introduce you to the final member of your team. MegaGirl!” I forgot how DRAMATIC that was. I also forgot that’s how MegaGirl comes into the story.

I need to stop pausing every 5 seconds oh my god I’ll never finish this tonight if I don’t.

“All hail AstroBoy” That was the funniest line. “MegaGirl, can you kill humans?” “No. But I’d like to.” I can’t handle it. “A horse ate my cousin! Me and horses got a feud.” #1 MegaGirl doing the “I’m watching you” hand sign. I can’t. “Hey. Miráme. *Slaps* NOW ESCHUCHAME” amazing. “Or that time. You taught me calculus... CALCULUS WAS TOUGH.” I never went past pre-calc. Nope. Ah. Get Back Up. One of my fave songs. “And now we dance.” Dylan’s “OW” as they lean back. “Ok Idiotas. Say something nice. Or I will kill you.” It’s all so iconic.

“So you still think being an egg planter is lame?” “...Yes.”  The larva oh my god. I forgot we see one before the end. That’s Jaime playing the larva I think. Life is definitely one of my all-time favorite StarKid songs to this day. I wish it was longer. I love it so much. And I love that its instrumental is scattered as a motif throughout the show. “It’s a short, small thing we lead. With so much potential, pointless or essential, which one can I be?” Wow. Near Pippin levels of giving me an existential crisis. Also wow Joey improved his singing so much between AVPS and Starship. “My name’s Bug” “*Gasp!* Like a bug??” “Uh... no.” “Good. I’m February, like the month, but a person.” I should start saying that honestly. “I’m Hope, like the concept, but a person.” “You boldly go where every man -hey- woman -bark woof- or data dog has ever gone before! Sorry K9DX” Adorable. Joey’s subtle little double nod he makes the Bug puppet do when he’s shocked she thinks he’s a Starship Ranger. Amazing. Ah he said goddamn not deadgoddamn! February should have known right then he wasn’t human! “Take my claw” that too. "The only thing that needs to rest are your jokes, because they are so tired.” “Woahhhhhh” No but like... why don’t I use that line in everyday life... “Now I am slightly less weak.” “Ok. I’m going to shoot this metal bitch!” I’m dying. How did I forget the Taz/MegaGirl rivalry?? “That thing is a R-O-B-O-T man” “Can’t fool me with numbers, Krayonder.” I’m dead. “The stack of hay was my cousin!” #2 The way Meredith says “barometric pressure” is great. And Tootsie saying “Well you must take real good care of it, because I never would have guessed.” He’s such a sweetheart. “Nobody shoot dammit, nobody shoot.” “KILL KILL KILL” I never really liked Hideous Creatures but it’s so cute to see MegaGirl do the choreo robotically. I love that the Gap hasn’t changed. “Cool it skank, you do not know me.” Another line that I forgot until a split second before it was said. I’m so glad whoever edited this added some pews going in the wrong way for Tootsie’s gun. I know I definitely noticed Tootsie’s gun was backwards during this part, but I don’t know if I noticed it was backwards in that very first scene too. I forgot about MegaGirl tossing out Specs. That “MEGAGIRL!!!” scream from Joe though.

“Never in my 6 long days of life.” Underappreciated joke. Also, I think this is the 4th unique upright bug puppet. We got red/pink, green/blue, green/pink, and now red/blue. Also, Nick Lang is a great puppeteer. “Yes, I helped her escape. But I swear, never in a million years, did I think I’d be caught and yelled at for it!”  Oh I forgot Bugette is the witness. Jaime’s angry face behind Joey is killing me. “He didn’t know the humans were evil.” “Oh, they’re not.” “Shut up!” Humoons and hoomans. “And no more singing or dancing” *gasps of horror* “The Overqueen has overspoken.” “Well, that’s not gonna help your chances with Bugette” Oh Roach. “PERHAPS.” Jim destroys me.

God the 4-person Pincer puppet. Amazing. Dylan’s arms being strong enough to be above his head for 10 minutes straight. Amazing. Also, Nick Lang is so emotive as a claw. It took me a sec but yeah JoMo is the tail. “There were? Where are they?” Joey’s face. “Tell me all about her” The claws under the chin I can’t. Hey StarKid, I see you throwing in an ad mid-video before Kick It Up a Notch. You’re lucky I love and support you guys. “Put ‘em together and what have you got?” bibbity boppity boo. More Disney references! This scene is full of them. Man, remember when we were all blown away by Dylan’s voice in this song the first time? Like we could tell he could sing in AVPM/S, but his songs were just so jokey and only his long “Welcooooooooooome” showed us his talent. But then Kick It Up a Notch happened. And we FINALLY appreciated Dylan’s beautiful voice. “I pushed it to the limit.” and “To coin a phrase, be a man.” more Disney. I might be overthinking this and will have to rewatch Life to confirm, but I think the camera zooming out as Pincer reprises Life is just like the camerawork when Bug sang it originally. If so, then wow even when filming their shows StarKid really thinks it all through. (Update: It totally is referencing the original zooms for Life and that’s amazing. Except it’s zooming out instead of in. I LOVE the attention to detail even in filming the show. I’m gonna guess that’s Liam’s doing.) All I can see when I hear Bug’s chorus of this song is Jaime and her SPACE tour dancing, which they incorporated in Apocalyptour as actual choreography. Because they’re goofballs. The kick line. Love it. God. Even though it’s not my favorite song from Starship (just because I love Life and Beauty more), Kick It Up A Notch is one of the best StarKid has ever done. I really has everything. Dylan’s gorgeous voice. Not one but two reprises of earlier songs to throw Bug’s own words back at him. Jim’s bass line. Awesome puppets. Disney references. It’s so amazing. I love how all the comments are either about Dylan’s voice or Dylan’s ability to hold his arms up for a 10+ minute scene or both.

"Gameover man, gameover!” “I feel like cutting open your belly, and filling it with jelly” *Gasps* Oh my god, I put on the captions for a second, and  the caption said *Sad spayed puppy noises* “I am in charge of this mission now.” How did I forget about the mustache until 2 seconds before it happened? “She’s got the mustache now. *Kisses head* I love you” Oh my god Tootsie. I FORGOT ABOUT THE SECOND STACHE. There’s an ad right when we see Bug’s human form and I can’t even care because look at him! Ahhh. And the blue headband! Ahhhhh. Joey you’re so adorableeeee. “Bug? Well that’s a fine name.” His concerned face then the relief. Adorable. “Thank you sir. I am a tough bitch.” “Getting nothing but bug muff?!?” I love the slight delay the audience has before laughing as they realize what was just said. “Bug. You hard, ese. You flame.” I die. “Up there. In Space!” *dramatic pointing* No I totally didn’t just do the dramatic pointing with them... no that’s not in my muscle memory from 10 years ago... why would you think that. I’ll rave about Status Quo after it’s done. “But, what if I miss you?” Awwwwwwwww. And that “Just look up.” screenshot was used for “This.” memes in the fandom for years.

Oh Joey. Status Quo is such a good song too. And he really did improve as a singer to sing it. Earlier this week I remembered that this week is also the 10th anniversary of that time Darren was hopping from city to city every single day to promote the Warblers album. And at one point in that week he did a livestream that I remember rushing home to watch. In that livestream, I am 99% sure he sang Status Quo as a little sneak preview for Starship being released later that week. (Just checked, yep he sang it in a livestream on April 20 2011) God I love this song. Then the version the boys all sang for SPACE Tour was beyond beautiful too. Ahhh I love this musical.

Ok. It’s almost midnight. I started this 3 hours ago. I’m probably not finishing the show until 2am at the rate that I’m pausing and stopping to comment. But OH WELL.

“Dr. Spaceclaw” wow. “Leaving them behind was of little consequence, but a pleasure.” Oh Megagirl. “You did a very good job today too, son.” “*Gasp* Thanks dad.” That Star Wars fake-out though. Speaking of Star Wars, I really need to rewatch Ani now that I’m actively a Star Wars fan unlike last time when I still wasn’t invested in the movies I just watched them. How did I forget about Jaime playing Junior’s new mom?? ...Does Junior get an alien incubating in his chest... is that foreshadowing... I can’t remember. (This was like... half a foreshadow) This scene is funnier now that Breredith is married. The way Junior says “Phew” I’m dead. I remembered how they restrain MegaGirl once again 2 seconds before it happened oh my god. “We deserve bubbles on our skin.” An iconic line. “Well thank the long dead god you made it, Bug!”  The crunching of the handshake, I can’t. Oh someone in the comments pointed out that Bug and February are doing the Tarzan hand thing while Up’s asking Taz to see a movie. Adorable.

Get yourself a man like Tootsie who won’t stand for you talking down about yourself. “Maybe this was all part of God’s plan. He made before he died.” I love the dead god jokes. I remember years ago some kid on facebook was like “The dead god jokes are offensive” and I was like “It’s a sci-fi musical about a bug in a human body but sure worry about god being dead.” but probably in an even more immature answer. I’m just mesmerized by Tootsie and MegaGirl’s verses. God. The first Dylan and Meredith duet. Amazing. And MegaGirl’s confused face is great. “Don’t press that button, or we’ll all be sucked into space.” So... Can anyone tell me what foreshadowing is? Oh shoot... ok wait no I’ll comment on that when we get there. God that is such a cute love song. I wrote barely anything just because I love that song so much. Would love to know where Tootsie’s taking her though.

Oh my god this scene! I forgot about this. How could I forget this. “Well the world always looks a little bit brighter, from on top of a lap.” I had remembered Bug sitting on Up’s lap, but not Specs. This is the part I forgot. Adorable. Ahhhh so cute. The Specs/Krayonder relationship was apparently cut from the filmed version, but was present if you saw it live. These moments are adorable. And I love how this is the second person JoMo’s had to carry in this show since he also carried Denise earlier. “Why if it isn’t Bug, my oldest friend.” and “Don’t say that, my dear.” are adorable. Oh wait. Up sat on Bug’s lap. Not the other way around. Ok. I didn’t remember this scene as well as I thought I did. I’m dying. I didn’t want to write anything during this, but oh my god “That son of a bitch Optimus Prime” I forgot that. I love the audience’s reaction to “The entire right side of my body, it’s a robot” because they all gasp, and then laugh at themselves for gasping. I knew there was something he couldn’t do without crying. I didn’t remember it being “Sir I Wanna Buy These Shoes” Christmas Song. It’s ok Up, I haven’t listened to that song in full in years. I can’t handle it. But Christmas songs in general make me cry too. Oh Up said goddamn instead of deadgoddamn too. Hmm... Aww the mother spider story. “I think the old you was just killing out of hate.” “Oh I was.” I’m dying. Awwww the nose kiss. I definitely remembered that. “Deadgodspeed soldier!” The way Joey misses catching the keys and also Darren’s “Woo!” in the audience again. So great. That 12 minute scene is just adorable and the Up story is so dramatic and hilarious.

Hmm finishing before 2am might be ambitious... “Hahaha. Then I’ll shoot him!” “Taking care of my business down on the planet is that cool with you?” Brian’s delivery of that line has always intrigued me. “How much I care about my MegaGirl unit’s survival is also a percent equivalent to zero” Rude. “You are nothing like my boyfriend, Tootsie Noodles.” “Yes, well - wait WHAAA” This scene is so different now that they’re married. “Ha. Ha. It was cute.” “You’re... a toaster.” *Slaps* Ok 1) I used to use that insult all the time and only half ironically. I was a strange teenager. 2) She just hurt a human... isn’t that against programming, or can she just not kill humans? Evil angry Brolden is something we need more of. I love Brian as a villain. More please. “You stupid goddamn robot” So I guess they say goddamn and deadgoddamnit. I’m overthinking the evolution of language in this universe. Also Brian’s screams while being choked are amazing. I’ve never forgotten those, if anything they’re better now.

AHHHH I REFRESHED AND DELETED ALL OF MY STUFF FOR BEAUTY. Kill me. I’m so mad. Let me try to recreate it but I hate myself. I was saving this draft after every part but OF COURSE I don’t save after my favorite song and then refresh.

Oh poor Meredith. Her white wig doesn’t let her blend in as much when she’s in the hoodies playing a bug. “Oh hey Bugette, we’re just trying to get Bug laid!” That bug had to know about Bugette’s crush though? That’s just cruel. “The ending is killer” ruuuuuuddddddddddeee. I know I had at least one more point, but that’s lost to the ether. Beauty is probably my fave, if not tied with Life. When I was listening to it earlier, I was overcome with emotion because it’s just such a joyful song. These days I cry over happy stuff almost as much as I cry over the sad. And these lines just hit so hard... I love it. I love this song so much and this scene so much. “Bug. She excreted her filth for you. WE DID IT!!!!!!!!” Brant Cox is so good. It really is a shame he’s not in anything else besides AVPSY and the 10th Anniversary with everyone else. “I do accept you for who you really are. A genius.” Well February, you’ll be glad to know that you thought of that, so you’re the genius. Wow. Junior’s 25, Brian was 25, and now I’m 25. This really was perfect timing for the 10th anniversary. Also I do not feel 25. “Suck off!” amazing.

I’M SAVING THIS TIME.

Ok next part. Luckily I was only 1 minute into the next part when I refreshed. Still so mad at myself... “Someone really firetrucked up big time” (Dead)God I love that line. I also used firetruck unironically. Once again, I was a strange teenager and I didn’t like cursing and I still don’t. “This is so weird, I’m so used to the scrambly version.” (It was while writing this line the first time that I refreshed and lost Beauty....) Ok as I watch AJ, it’s hitting me that he almost definitely came to the set during rehearsals and filmed his part since it’s not a green screen like the rest of them. “The hunters have become the hunted, and it’s wabbit season.” “That was a good video, until the end when it got sad.” Thanks Bug. “I think, I just had a think” See February’s smart. “I’m in a weird situation” Love that line. “Bug is a BUG!? I DON’T BELIEVE IT” Oh Junior. Dylan’s insulted face at “I am not... a dumbass.”  So I can’t tell if Brian forgets he’s trapped when he moves his arms into a more relaxed position to lean on the column and then puts them back, or if it’s purposefully staged that way. Brian’s acting while he pretends to be shy and embarrassed about his evil plan is amazing and adorable. Brian has a good evil laugh, why don’t we get him as a villain more often? Also I was gonna make some sort of joke about Nick as Pincer’s left claw vs. Robert as Snarl’s left paw, but I’ll leave it be.

I FORGOT ABOUT THAT WEIGHT TAZ WAS LIFTING JUST FLOATING UP TO THE SKY WHEN SHE LETS GO. I just laughed out loud. “Damn that G.L.E.E. They’re always making twisted abominations of everything!!” I cannot handle it. And the wink. Poor Darren but also not poor Darren at all. I was just now WRACKING my mind for who could possibly be playing Pincer’s tail if JoMo was being devoured by mosquitos. It’s Brant. Literally the entire cast is currently onstage. Ok Krayonder’s been getting his blood drained for 3 minutes, why is he alive? OH I FORGOT KRAYONDER GETS UP AND SHOOTS THE BUGS. Ok and he gets chopped by Pincer’s claws too so HOW does he survive? StarKid answer!!! I forgot how dramatic this musical gets when you got both the bugs and MegaGirl coming after the humans. Aww the Vulcan salute from Specs. “I changed my name. To Tootsie... MegaGirl.” I love the reactions of the people in the audience who immediately realize what that means. I hear at least one “oh my god” that sounds like sobbing. Awwwww Tootsie’s “that’s real” speech and “I’d love you if you was the horse that ate my cousin.” (#3) just... get yourself a man like Tootsie MegaGirl. He is perfection. God the downloading love scene is so cute. I can’t handle it.

The Up saving Taz scene is so dramatic. Then Brian and Jim just calmly walk offstage. It kills me. Also why did Jaime just continue to lie there? “I just needed to learn how to kill with my heart.” Not exactly what Bug meant, but it works. God Taz climbing onto Up’s back is still the most hilarious thing ever. Whoever thought of her climbing that way was a genius. So funny. I always wanted to try it. Holding the gun up to her head like a blowdryer always gave me anxiety. Making the door out of a scrim that can be backlit was genius. Oof and bringing back “The needs of the many bugs outweigh the needs of the few bugs. Or the one bug.” just hurts. Poor Bug. My heart. This is probably the line that sticks with me to this day and I do think about sometimes.

Ok it’s now 2am and I still have 2 more parts.

I sorta love that Joey didn’t have the time to change into his blacks so he’s still in the Starship Ranger suit while playing the Bug puppet. “Save the Overqueen. I love her.” Awww. “Roach, I’m gonna get the job done if it’s the second last thing I do.” Love it. That Kick It Up A Notch Reprise though. Brian, you should play villains more often. Also remember all of us being like “LUPIN CAN SING?!?!?!??!!” “Lucky for me, God is dead. When you see him in hell, tell him Junior sent you.” Deadgod I love that line. This whole deadgod thing was just leading up to that amazing line. Oh no Bugette! Bug saying “maestro” oh my god. “DFSDSJFDSJKFDS... I’m dead.” I forgot that part! Oh my god the way Brian flicks the glasses back down on his face. Ok so I saw Lauren wiggle her way behind the mucus sac, but I didn’t see Nick come onstage. I rewinded, and I guess the zoom in shots on Brian and Joey were timed so we can’t see Nick join Lauren to be the first larva to come out. Oh well. And I love the crowd cheering as Junior dies. “And bingo was his name-o” That callback though. I forgot that the Overqueen eats Bugette’s body while crying. “Or Bugette! Oh...” Also god Roach is adorable.

Last part. 2:21am. Here we go. Krayonder got his blood sucked out by giant mosquitos and was cut up by a giant scorpion, but all he needs is a bandage around his head. Awwww the soft “I Wanna Be” playing the background as Bug begs the team to accept his bug form. Bug being so mad “It’s that bastard Pincer isn’t it?” and then being so happy that Joey does the little nose scrunch thing. So cute. JOEY’S FACE WHEN DENISE KISSES THE BUG PUPPET. Cannot believe I forgot that until 2 seconds before it happened too. “I now pronounce you man vs. machine. Fight!” WOAH. Why in the WORLD did “eep op ork ahah” come back to me. I was able to say it WITH Joey. That was straight from the DEPTHS of my teenage brain oh my god. I forgot about that oh my GOD. THAT’S INSANE. I FORGOT SO MUCH STUFF BUT I REMEMBERED HOW TO SAY “I LOVE YOU” IN BUG.

And the Beauty reprise.

God I love this musical. It’s still my fave StarKid show I think. And I’m horrified to see that it has only 500K views for the last part, so only 500K people have watched it all the way through after 10 years. That’s disgraceful. It’s amazing. Watch Starship.

It is 2:32am. I started at 8:50pm. Got sidetracked when I had to rewatch the Beauty part of Act 2 again to make sure I got my notes back in the post. Took a few bathroom breaks. But this is mostly because I paused every like 10 seconds to make a comment, so it took 5 and a half hours to watch a 3 hour musical. This why I take forever to watch things while liveblogging. I take too long to writing notes.

I’ll probably just post this in the morning. Gotta proofread for mistakes before posting.

Ok it’s the next afternoon. This post is literally 5,000+ words and takes 20 minutes to read according to a online word counter. I’m sorry to whoever read this entire thing. Your reward is the pictures of the Starship plushies I crocheted when I was 15 and 16.

(Ignore the bad lighting and my horribly chipped paint. That’s the only picture I have of the Bugette one since I gave it to Lauren Lopez a day later. I started making another for myself shortly after but never finished. Maybe I should finally finish the second one... hmm...)

[dolphin-enthusiast]

bucci gang with a model s/o hc??

Bruno:

- Absolutely (and secretely) infatuated with s/o’s photoshoots to the point where he buys all the magazines, products etc. that include them. He won’t outright admit that he has basically all of their stuff and will be HELLA embarassed if s/o ever came across his secret little collection one day by mistake.

- Most likely that will happen someday and that’s when Bruno’s usual calm and collected persona would shatter a little, the man erratically stumbling over his own words and blushing madly whilst trying to explain himself. Last thing he’d want is to come across as creepy or stalker-ish for buying all of the magazines and pictures that s/o was featured in.

- Of course that s/o would just chuckle and call him adorable, something that would make poor Bruno lose it e v e n more. S/o would be flattered that their own partner thinks of their work so highly and greatly admires it, hence why from that day on they’d make sure to give him all sorts of limited edition stuff, some of which would even be signed! Needless to say, Bruno would feel like the luckiest man in the entire warudo.

Giorno:

- Just like Bruno, he’d be very invested in s/o’s work, every so often the man complimenting s/o on their photogenic nature and their overall lovely features. He’s just a little bit more open with his passion for s/o’s modelling career as opposed to Bruno, even though Gio would still be lowkey embarassed and would get hella blushy on many occasions.

- Giorno has an eye for art, and models are no exception. He thinks of modelling as its own kind of art because in his opinion it’s not easy at all for one to be able to fully convey all sorts of emotions and overall be photogenic in all of their photos at all times. He thinks of this career very highly and has a great appreciation for s/o’s work.

- One quick way to fluster him is for s/o to offer him signed pictures or even gift him a very rare limited edition magazine that features them on the cover! Of course that Giorno would modestly say that they really didn’t need to do that, but s/o knows him all too well and can see the sheer joy in his eyes once they give him such presents. If s/o was ok with it, Gio would even take some pics of them and keep them as memories.

Abbacchio:

- At first he wouldn’t even be able to believe that s/o is a goddamn model. How did he even end up with someone like this?? Hell, they could have ANYONE in the world and yet they chose to be with him. Every so often such questions would be plaguing Abba’s mind to the point where he’d end up asking s/o about it, to which his partner would just call him silly and explain that their career literally has nothing to do with their personal life and the choices they make of course.

- Abba would be lowkey embarassed of his behavior sometimes, but it’s just that he thinks they’re extremely beautiful and successful and that they could find someone way better than him. But honestly he’d be lying if he’d say that he ain’t fond of skimming through various magazines that include his hella photogenic partner. Just watch the man lose it after s/o secretely signs one of his magazines one day, Abbacchio letting out a comically loud gasp upon making the discovery once he turns to the first page.

- Seeing that their partner has a tendency of putting himself down sometimes, at some point s/o would come up with the wonderful idea of them taking pictures of Abba just to show him how goddamn beautiful he is as well. Of course that Abba would be extremely flushed and would make up excuses as to not do it at first, but s/o would eventually convince him and it would turn out to be quite effective. S/o would keep instructing him on how to pose (and the man would be a damn mess) and what expressions to make and holy shit he actually is very photogenic if he wants to??? S/o would ask him if he ain’t considering a modelling career, to which Abbacchio would just roll his eyes with a flustered smile.

Mista:

- If you thought Bruno and Giorno were chaotic fanboys then you ain’t seen jack shit because Mista stands out the most. He’d immediately recognize them as “that one super popular and hella hot model” and would jump up and down whilst asking for an autograph with the biggest most excited smile ever. How did these two end up actually dating??? No one knows for sure.

- Mista is extremely open about his passion for s/o’s modelling career and is constantly complimenting and praising their work. You bet your ass that he has literally all the magazines and posters featuring s/o and he ain’t afraid of asking for some extra rare limited edition numbers either. He’s absolutely thrilled whenever s/o has a new photoshoot and is basically cheering them on all the time.

- He’d be the happiest in the world if s/o would sign stuff for him too. On top of that. Mista also has a habit of bragging to people about his partner and how great they are in general, so the fact that they’re a popular model will be thrown into discussion more than once. He would tone it down if s/o wanted him to though, but he just can’t himself sometimes since he’s really proud of them yknow??? Also 11/10 asks if he can paint them like one of his french girls even though he’s fucking Italian.

Fugo:

- We all know he’s a man of culture, so there’s no way he wouldn’t recognize them. Ok maybe he wouldn’t OUTRIGHT recognize them like the chaotic fanboy that Mista is, but the second he’d see them on the street he’d just k n o w that they look familiar...till he glances to the side and sees an ad and realizes that holy shit they really are THE model!

- Fugo is hella shy and will be extremely reluctant to ask them for an autograph or shit like that, not to mention that he doesn’t wanna come off as overwhelming or creepy either. So once again, how did these two end up dating? Not sure at all. If anything, s/o was probably the one who made most of the moves all because Fugo would be too fucking shy especially because holy hell they are so popular and amazing and he doesn’t wanna embarass himself. S/o would find him to be hella cute of course. And don’t even get me started on that time when they cheekily offered him a little picture that had a small message written by them, autograph included. Fugo still keeps that shit in his wallet and calls it his lucky charm.

- Once the two make their relationship official though, Fugo will realize that he was being extremely silly for being so self conscious. After all, even if s/o is a very popular and well respected model it’s not as if they’re a deity (even though they sure look like one) or something. He’d gather more courage as time would pass to the point where he’d be buying countless of their magazines and posters, not to mention that he’s also very supportive and would be admiring them for just...having the balls to pose for a camera on a daily basis.

Narancia:

- Doesn’t even recognize them at first and starts dating them without having a single fucking clue until he sees an ad and the person featured in it gives him a little sense of deja vu. Only when s/o outright tells him about their career does the poor boi connect all the dots and he quite literally jumps up in the air full of excitement. He’d want to slap himself for being so blind all of this time but hey nothing else matters because his s/o is a f u c k i n g m o d e l.

- Considers himself the luckiest man on the planet and, just like Mista, brags to everyone about his dear partner and their succesful career. Sometimes he can get just a little bit too excited to the point where he’s staring off into the sky with dreamy eyes as he goes on and on about s/o’s lovely smile, but overall he’s just a very wholesome and supportive boyfriend. S/o happens to be nervous before a photoshoot? No problem, walking dose of serotonin Narancia is there to encourage and comfort them!

- Gets each and every product/magazine that features them to the point where he sometimes almost goes broke and it’s honestly the funniest shit ever. He just loves his s/o so much and wants to support them so damn bad by buying all the merch and products, even though s/o probably makes like twice the amount of money that he does. They’d find his behavior and enthusiasm to be extremely adorable, although s/o would still be a bit concerned about his spending habits sometimes.

Bonus - Trish:

- Honestly it’s my personal headcanon that Trish has an aspiration for modelling and lowkey wants to become a popular model someday. If not a model then an actress for sure. It goes without saying that she’d instantly recognize them on the street and would be h e l l a excited, the girl rushing towards said model and politely asking for an autograph.

- Basically, being with s/o would be the most thrilling experience of her life. Of course that she wouldn’t date them JUST because they are a model, but that aspect would also play a small part in all of this since she has a great admiration for models and she loves reading all sorts of stuff about the industry. That being said, she’d be absolutely smitten with both s/o as a whole and their modelling persona/image and would occasionally ask them for info about how it feels to be a model, how exhausting it is, how the industry works etc.

- Honestly deep down she’d wish that someday she’s going to be able to model along with s/o, and her partner would actually encourage her and support her dreams too. They would find her to be very cute and her entire admiration and love for their career would matter alot to them. S/o wouldn’t even be surprised once they stumble across the huge pile of modelling magazines (some of which would be featuring them) sitting in Trish’s room, even though the poor girl would be lowkey embarassed.

[dragracereviews]

My Ultimate Top 10 Favorite Drag Race Queens

#10 - Kameron Michaels: NGL, Kameron is partially on this list because I would fuck her in a heartbeat. I actually plan on making a list later of queens I would sleep with in and/or out of drag and you will definitely find Miss Michaels high on there. I’ve seen her live on the Werq the World tour and I 100% regret not getting Meet and Greet though I probably would’ve just drooled on her and made a fool of myself so maybe it’s better that I didn’t. It’s a known fact that Kameron is an incredible lip syncer (if you haven’t watched season 10, please do so just to see her in action because honestly, she’s one of the few good things about that season) and she did NOT disappoint. Her dancing was only beat out by Vanjie who you may or may not see later on this list. Kameron if you’re out there reading this (LOL, we all know she isn’t) and you ever feel like experimenting with an actual biological woman, hit me up!

#9 - Sharon Needles: And here we have another attractive man out of drag! Sharon was the OG underdog and while I’m not going to sit here and bash Phi Phi O’Hara because she’s actually talented AF (checkout her Harry Potter cosplay, it’s soooo good), Sharon definitely didn’t deserve all the shade thrown at her on season 4. Her drag aesthetic has always been equals parts spooky and equal parts fabulous, but she’s actually improved over the years and it’s made me love her even more. My favorite Sharon moment ever is during a “Queens Reading Mean Comments” video on WOWPresents’ Youtube channel where someone said they liked her old teeth better and she just goes, “Well my old teeth just looked ridiculous with my new lips!” Get ‘em, girl.

#8 - Jinkx Monsoon: I want Jinkx to be my mom. There, I said it. Also, if you don’t get that reference, get your shit together and subscribe to WOW Presents on Youtube you fucking bumpkin. Jinkx was the loveable weirdo on her season and received a lot of hate from her fellow queens but I loved her from the start. I have since forgiven Roxxxy Andrews for her cattiness because of her rudemption on All Stars 2 (insert her Read U Wrote U verse here) but nothing was more satisfying than watching Jinkx go from the underdog to America’s Next Drag Superstar. I don’t know what’s more iconic; her tendency to fall asleep at inopportune times, her laugh, or all the jokes about her being a full blown swamp witch. Either way, it will always be Monsoon season in my eyes.

#7 - Nina West: Hands down, the DEFINITION of Miss Congeniality! This choice was so obvious, I don’t even know why they took a vote. I think that even if they left it up to the fans, it would’ve been her. I fucking LOVE Nina. I’ve actually met her IRL and my first thoughts were 1: she’s HUGE (hello, she’s a six foot tall man in like 6 inch heels and I’m barely over five feet) and 2. she just radiates happiness! She is the only queen I’ve met that asked me my name (though shout out to Plastique Tiara for calling me gorgeous as if she’s not the most beautiful creature on the planet) and she didn’t make me feel like an idiot when I just stared at her adoringly and just word vomited “you’remyfavoriteiloveyousomuch”. Class act people!

#6 - Bianca del Rio: Do I even need an explanation for this one? Hands down, the undisputed winner of season 6, and that’s coming from a die-hard ***** fan (see entry #2). Did she wear the same silhouette 10+ times? Yes. Can she kind of be a bitch sometimes? Definitely. But is she the funniest fucking person alive? Probably! My love for Bianca is infinite but I still wouldn’t want her to read me, at least not in person. Actually, scratch that, I’ve seen her Twitter feed and getting read online is almost worse. I fucking love Hurricane Bianca and the sequel even though it’s one of those so-bad-it’s-good type of film series. I sadly missed her last tour because it was the same night as Sasha Velour’s Smoke & Mirrors show and as amazing as Sasha was, my heart was broken that I couldn’t go to both. But you better believe the next time she’s in town, I’m forking out lots of $$ for VIP and I may or may not faint at Bianca’s feet #noregrets

#5 - Vanessa Vanjie Matteo: Mother. Fucking. Vanjie. OKAY, I’ve met this bitch IRL and let me tell you, she is the cutest fucking thing. Like Nina, it shocked me how apparent it is that she’s a man (square jaw, hello?) but she can still paint for filth and look fishy AF even with her boyish features. Also, AMAZING performer! I waited 3 hours after the M&G for her to actually come on stage and perform only two songs (that’s a story for another day) but let me tell you, it was worth the fucking wait. I showered that bitch with Canadian monopoly money and I would’ve given her more if I wasn’t such a broke millennial. And to top the whole night off, I got woken up at 5 am to my friend screaming because Vanjie had reposted my photo in her story so I was essentially Instagram famous for all of like, a day. Thanks girl xo

#4 - Bendelacreme: I love me some Dela. This queen proved in both her regular season and All Stars that she is a force to be reckoned with. Season 6 wouldn’t have been the same without her and did I want to yell at Darienne Lake for being a bitch to her? Absolutely! (Gia Gunn pun intended) And I honestly think that if she hadn’t eliminated herself, she would’ve won AS3 (though if you read my #1 entry, I am 100% satisfied with who did win). She completely deserved her Miss Congeniality title, and while I see where the others AS3 queens were coming from when they suspected she was trying a little too hard to keep up that image, I did appreciate her trying to play the game with some class, because we don’t see that often on Drag Race. I also love her friendship with Jinkx and it’s definitely on my bucket list to see one of their shows one day. You know what they say, the Creme always rises to the top!

#3 - Brooke Lynn Hytes: Full disclosure, I’m Canadian but that’s not the only reason why I love Brooke (she is the Queen in the North though, and I’ll fight you if you say otherwise). This queen is fucking TALENTED! Season 11 would have failed without her, IMHO. She can design and sow a complete outfit, read people to filth, sort of sing (I still listen to Queens Everywhere daily, especially her verse), dance circles around ANYBODY, and lip sync like her mother fucking life depends on it. Did she, by the end of the season, forget that’s there’s more to a lip sync than being on pointe? Yes, absolutely. But that doesn’t change the fact that she is literal perfection and I think that’s why Ru gave Yvie the crown instead of her (though I love Yvie so don’t come for me). Brooke’s biggest downfall was the fact that she wasn’t relatable and I am 100% okay with that. Sometimes you just have to worship the unattainable. The only issue I have with Brooke is her and Vanjie not being officially together anymore because yes, I am one of those fans that ship queens together, especially queens that have actually dated. I will never get over #Branjie, just saying.

#2 - Adore Delano: "I'm a fucking Libra!" As soon as these words left her mouth, I knew I was in love with Adore Delano. Season 6 is by far my favorite season (spoiler alert if I decide to make a Top 10 Best Seasons list) and if it weren't for my #1 pick, she would 100% have the top spot. Hell, before I discovered WOW Presents, she WAS my #1 pick (read my next entry to understand what I mean). Adore is simultaneously adorable (pun intended) and fierce AF. She's beautiful, hilarious, and did I mention beautiful?! She is the reason I say "party" at inappropriate times. She is the reason I wish I was a Libra instead of a fucking Scorpio. She is the reason I insist everybody start their first Drag Race binge with season 6 because I know they’ll fall in love with her as much as I have. Adore, if you’re reading this, I fucking adore you.

#1 - Trixie Mattel & Katya Zamolodchikova: Of course these two are tied as my number one spot. Individually, these queens are fucking fierce and extremely talented (go download Trixie's country albums if you don't believe me), but together they are pure gold. If you've only ever watched their run on season 7, you probably don't understand why I love them so much, so do yourself a favor and go watch All Stars 2 & 3, as well as their web shows "UnHhhh", "The Trixie & Katya Show", and “Queens Who Like To Watch”. I can even give you a list of other stand alone videos of them to watch (ex. "Besties for Cash", "Fashion Photo Review", compilation videos of the pair in Palm Springs... I think you get the gist). Truth be told, I'm absolutely obsessed with these two, so much so that I may or may not have indulged in some online fan fiction about them from time to time...don’t judge me, okay?! I love a friends-turned-lovers love story, and I know I’m not the only one wishing #Trixya would happen IRL. I've also shelled out so much money to Trixie alone on her merch and makeup, and I'm waiting very impatiently for them to go on tour together so I can go full Futurama and just scream "take my money" as I buy the most VIP package they have. Trixie and Katya are the ultimate definition of All Stars and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise.

[neverwatchedonepiece]

635-637: "The Fateful Reunion! Bellamy the Hyena!", "A Super Rookie! Bartolomeo the Cannibal!" and "Big Names Duke it Out! The Heated Block B Battle!"

Luffy’s entire experience of Dressrosa so far.

If I had two words to sum up these episodes, they would be: new characters.

New characters everywhere. 

And, if @mrkashkiet​ is right, some of them should not be immediately written off as battle fodder. I have done my best to keep track of all the new names  and faces (let’s face it, Dressrosa has not yet descended into HxH War of Succession level madness). 

But I think I have a better handle on the competitors now. Who knew paying close attention would work wonders?

Oh, and I forgot to mention that the influx of new characters is not limited to the Colosseum.

Trafalgar Law: Supplier of Tea and Shade

Yes.

It is the return of Cipher Pol. Except this time, the World Government have unleashed the Big Guns.

The Caesar Handover Team (Law, Robin, Usopp and Caesar) had camped at a pavement cafe near the Long Bridge they must cross to reach Green Bit. They were indulging in a bit of recon because the bridge, to put it mildly, was in a state of disrepair.

A rickey, rusting wreck is what I want to say.

A conveniently chatty waiter was only too happy to furnish them with intel. Apparently, people used to freely cross the bridge two-hundred years ago, but an influx of fighting fish ruined everything. The people tried to reinforce the bridge with iron but it never worked. Yes, people still try to cross. The waiter himself knew people who’d made the attempt. But no one ever came back. (I bet the Smile factory is on Green Bit.)

Caesar and Usopp were not keen on making the crossing. Law told them to pipe down and pulled the “we’re here now, anyway” card. The lack of unrest in Dressrosa was what worried Law. (Sanji noticed that too.) Their king had abdicated suddenly. Why was everyone so calm?

Then something awesome happened.

Robin saw something out the corner of her eye. She cringed, pulled her hat down further over her face. Caesar caught on too.

Three sinister, white-robed, masked people walked down the street like ghosts. They were heading in the direction of the bridge.

It was CP0. According to Robin, they are even deadlier that CP9 and are charged with only the highest level intelligence missions. “When they’re on the move,” Robin said, “nothing good happens.”

Except plot, Robin. Good plot happens.

I mean, come on! First Fujitora is hanging about, supposedly to deal with all the pirates in the Colosseum. Now CP0 have crawled out of the woodwork but they are lurking about the bridge. They are all in on something. They must know or suspect something is going on in Dressrosa. I’ll bet they have intel Luffy and Law don’t.

I wonder if Fujitora wants Luffy to draw out Doflamingo (or at least the proof something is going on). He definitely knows Luffy is behind the beard and he let Luffy go. Why? The plot chickenz.

Zoro , Sanji and Kinemon: Technically All Chasing After Precious Things

Elsewhere on Dressrosa, Zoro, Sanji and Kinemon have all gone their separate, chaotic ways.

Zoro has finally laid hands on Shusui again, but - and I cannot believe I am saying this - a small, thieving, invisible creature *was* behind the disappearance of Zoro’s belongings. And they referred to Zoro as a “human”, which means... I mean, are we really talking fairies here? Why do they need to steal stuff? Are they raising funds for Doflamingo? I have no idea what’s going on.  I am at the point of tin-foil hat speculation so I’ll quit before the hat is fully on.

Sanji managed to take out a sniper sixteen metres above ground with one kick. Why the need for a sniper kicking spree? He was being targeted while walking with Violet. I am still suspicious of her. I think she’s in on the whole thing and she is only just beginning to realise that, uh oh, she’s snared a really strong fighter, how do we get out of this one?

Also, Kinemon found himself surrounded by chuckling thugs who threw Kanjuuro’s location in his face. They recognised him by the “top-knot-shaped hat” (lmao). There was a, “If you don’t cooperate, we will kill you and your friend,” moment. Not super interested in this plot point, but looking forward to seeing how Oda weaves it into the wider storyline. 

Meanwhile, on The Event Horizon Sunny...

A portal has opened to another dimension.

In the grand scheme of things, everyone who went to Dressrosa got the better end of the bargain because this... this is some weird shit.

(Plus, there was another Momonosuke clue. While Momo was playing at being shogun (and Brook refused, saying he “Only takes orders from Luffy-san”) Dr Chopper observed Momo’s behaviour. Apparently, Momo is putting up a good front, disguising some sort of trauma. What happened to him a Punk Hazard could be a good bet. Maybe there was something else we didn’t get to see.)

Bellamy Is A New Man! Sort of...

Back at the Colosseum, the main event was underway: Block B’s battle! We still haven’t reached the end of it yet but that’s because a lot was happening backstage.

The action picked up where it left off. Luffy’s reunion with Bellamy did not go quite as I expected - in a good way. A lot has happened since Luffy kicked Bellamy’s ass at Jaya. For one, after ridiculing Luffy for his ambition to visit Skypeia, Bellamy made his own trip. He lost his crew in the attempt (I think?) but brought back a huge golden souvenir, which he presented to Doflamingo. 

I didn’t quite understand his connection with Doflamingo before. I figured he was part of Doflamingo’s crew and worked exclusively for him. But it turns out Bellamy had his own crew? Maybe they were allied with/working for Doflamingo?

At any rate, since he returned from Skypeia, Bellamy has become a changed man. He has obsessively worked for Doflamingo - who was Bellamy’s pirate hero since he was a kid - in hopes of being promoted to an executive post in the Donquixote family. 

That is why he entered the Battle Royale. Not to win the Mera Mera fruit, but for a promotion.

I have the funniest feeling he won’t be getting it.

His spring power is cool, though. Luffy was right. He’s definitely become stronger. The way he took out Abdullah and Jeet was pretty stylish. I also like the character development Bellamy has undergone. Oda has morphed him from a loathsome, one-dimensional mook into someone with ambition who will do anything to achieve his goals. Nice.

Bartolomeo

Now, this guy was a surprise.

When Oda introduced Maynard last episode, I never thought for a minute that the badass Marine who held a knife to a pirate’s throat and took him out so easily would become instant fodder in the very next installment.

That’ll teach me for trying to predict Oda’s intentions.

Bartolomeo acts like an Edgy Edgerson (that’s a bit of an understatement, to be honest) but he does look out for his crew, as all good captains should. The guy who was murked last time by Maynard was part of his crew. Unfortunately for Maynard, Bartolomeo is the revenge type. Maynard was left crumpled in a bloody heap. It was interesting that Maynard had planned to take part in the competition. Was it for intel or were the Marines seriously thinking they were in with a shot at the Mera Mera fruit?

Bartolomeo is also one of the rookies Cavendish loathes. When the commentator introduced him, we learned it only took Bartolomeo a year to become (in)famous in the New World. Apparently, he roasted a crew of pirates and broadcast the footage and bombed some innocent civilians. As you do. He also won the coveted spot of #1 Most Annoying Pirate Who Should Just Go Away (lmao).

This was backed up by the crowd. They booed him like a pantomime villain and pelted him with trash. The bomb prank did nothing to salvage the tatters of his public image. Even Dagama was like, “They hate you so much, brat.”

But Bartolomeo didn’t care. He is super edgy. “Don’t even want them to like me.” (If he met Eustass Kidd, the amount of Edge would reach critical mass and cause some sort of singularity).

I have the feeling Bartolomeo will win this fight.

Why?

He has barely lifted a finger the entire time. When the gong was struck, he lay down like Slaking, took a nap. Then he woke up, pissed in the moat (lmao) and somehow took out Hack the Fishman Karate Master with little effort. He must be a fruit user. I wonder what his power is?

It’s testament to how One Piece stretches the limits of your morality when you find yourself laughing and cheering for a guy who literally roasted his rivals and broadcast the footage over the OP equivalent of YouTube.

And the Award for Most Hostile Leading Question Goes To...

While the fighting was underway, Luffy and Cavendish watched from a balcony. Cavendish gave Lucy the low-down on who the most likely winners would be. Apart from Bartolomeo and Bellamy, there was Elizabello II, his tactician Dagama, Ricky (a mysterious Gladiator), Blue Gilly from the Longarm Tribe, Tank Lepant of Dressrosa, Abdullah and Jeet, and Hack (a Fishman Karate specialist and fan of Jimbei).

Elizabello II, Dagama and Tank teamed up with a cadre of random fodders to protect Elizabello. It turns out Liz has a King’s Punch ability that can take out entire fortresses. The only thing is, it takes ages for it to power up and he can only use it once a day. They must want the Mera Mera Fruit badly, as the restrictions of the King Punch make it pretty damned useless in this context. Even if he did get through to the next round, he might be one-on-one against Jesus Burgess. Burgess does not need to wait an hour to power up a punch. Even if it’s four fighters all in the ring together (I bet Luffy will team up with Rebecca), I don’t see Burgess helping him out.

Blue Gilly is a kick fighter with oddly hypnotic knee pads.

Ricky is a mystery. He is a gladiator other fighters have never seen but some random in the crowd claims he might have once - a warrior who fought with no shield.

The Middle Eastern trope fighters Abdullah and Jeet were taken out by Bellamy, Hack was defeated by Bartolomeo.

All very exciting. I love a Battle Royale.

But most of the action was taking place backstage.

While Luffy and Cavendish watched the battle, a hulking, craggy, mountainous figure approached. I knew he was big because Toei had given him the “Big Guy Clown Shoes” sound effect they use for guys like Moria and Kuma. He had the number 12 tattooed on his forehead. It was Don Chinjao.

He stood beside Luffy and Cavendish and said, “Hey, lovely view we’ve got here. Btw, how is Garp-san doing?”

Luffy, the honest soul, never saw the trap coming. “You know grandpa?”

Uh oh.

Well, the situation escalated hilariously quickly after that.

“Garp was like a real demon to us pirates back then. My wound still hasn’t healed, you know. I need you to pay for what your grandpa did to me. If I’d heard about Garp’s son, Dragon, sooner, you would never have been born.”

Ooft. That’s a heavy grudge.

Of course, Cavendish was like, “WHAT? YOU ARE LUFFY!”

And poor Luffy was still desperately clinging to his Lucy disguise, wondering why everyone was blaming him for things that really were not his fault. “no, really, i misheard. i am lucy, honest.”

“YOU DON’T MISHEAR YOUR OWN NAME!!”

Now both Cavendish and Don Chinjao were steamed. They ended up in a skirmish where Cavendish’s Shiny Sparkly Sword, Durandal, was shown off (to be fair, it does look awesome) and the endurance of Chinjao’s Mighty Skull was tested. Neither were going all out, which was nice.

At any rate, Luffy is now hanging from a window ledge. His promise to Franky is not working out well so far. 

Ahhh, that was a good tinkle.

[robininthelabyrinth]

My half of a fic-art trade with @waterwindow, who who wanted comics-based!Digger Harkness/Sam Scudder

I went with "locked in a room together" :) I hope you enjoy!

ao3 link

--

"I can't believe Cold locked us in this stupid room," Sam grumbles.

"I can't believe that he was right that we wouldn't leave till we finished the snacks," Digger replies, reaching out to snatch another bag of chips from the pile Cold had left behind.

Sam makes a face in agreement, looking down at the beer he had in one hand and the pretzels in the other. "I could get out of here anytime, you know," he says, because it's important to establish that he's here voluntarily. Even if it's only voluntarily because he's a sucker for a particular brand of pretzels and somehow Cold knows it. "With my mirrors -"

"Yeah, yeah, and I could bust the door lock with my boomerangs," Digger says, waving a hand. "And still: here we both are, innit true?"

"Maybe I think the man's got a point, Cap'n," Sam protests mildly, taking another swing of his beer. This is a blatant lie to save face, and Digger knows it, and worse, he knows that Digger knows it. Digger's not wrong in that they could both leave whenever they really wanted, but damnit, Cold did plan this out really well: he's got his favorite armchair, some beer and his favorite snacks. It's a pretty good inducement to stick around. Even if it does mean Cold was right about his plan to keep them in here, which gets Sam's goat a bit. Whatever, he'll figure out some way to take revenge later. "I mean, he only shoved us in here so we'd figure out how to combine our styles better, my mirrors, your boomerangs. It ain't necessarily a bad idea."

"We already combine our styles," Digger says. "S'why we're the Rogues, yeah? I go in with my boomerangs, you lot get in my way -"

"You mean you get in my way."

"Hah! Don't be ridiculous, Scuds. You're too reflexive to get anywhere."

"Uh-huh. And what about you? You always end up right where you started - ain't that your thing?"

"I do it on purpose," Digger says with great dignity, which would work except for the way his turquoise hat flops over his bright red hair when he slouches further down and shoves another handful of chips in his mouth.

"Can't see how doing it on purpose helps you much," Sam drawls, "given that where you started out - and end up - is usually prison."

"You say that like you had any successes before we all joined up."

"Says the man's big idea was to try to boomerang the Flasher to the moon and back," Sam says snippily. "At least I managed to shrink him to the size of a mouse -"

"He grew back, didn't he?"

"Well, yeah, but it still worked."

"Didn't he catch you the first time by turning off the lights?"

Sam huffs. If he wasn't so comfortable, he'd make something of Digger's little jabs. But as it is... "We have gotten more successes by working together, though."

"True," Digger concedes. He hasn't gotten up either, and his fingers are colored orange from that awful Aussie chips brand he can't get enough of; he won't start a real fight until he's had a chance to lick them clean. "But I don't see why we've got to practice it or nothing. Too much like work. Besides, you know your thing, I know mine..."

"It's like the United States," Sam says thoughtfully. "We've all got our different strengths, like the different states, and we could fight separately but together, but we're bound to be even stronger if we combine them into one attack instead of a bunch of different ones that the Flasher can take down one at a time. You know what I mean?"

"Nah, mate," Digger replies, deliberately exaggerating his Australian accent. "I ain't got no idea what you're on about, mate."

"Oh come off it," Sam says. "You've been out of the bush for years. You're as Central City as the rest of us."

"No one's as Central City as Cold."

Sam shrugs. It's probably true. He's pretty sure Cold spends his rare vacations away from the city pining for it.

Digger snorts, which either means Sam said that out loud or that Digger's thoughts have been going the same way. That is something Sam appreciates about Digger - they've got the same instincts, the same innate style.

Maybe that bullcrap he just blathered about figuring out how to work together better more really wasn't a bad idea.

"You could always shove a mirror onto one of my boomerangs," Digger offers, starting to lick the chip dust off his fingers. "We've done that before."

"Yeah," Sam agrees, slouching down further in his own chair to think. "It's sometimes hard to get an angle when just part of the boomerang's a mirror, though - can't you just use a boomerang made entirely of glass? I know you've done that a few times."

"And nearly cut my fingers to ribbons every time," Digger snorts. "The fact that I can doesn't mean I want to."

"I could work up one of my light generators into the boomerang instead," Sam offers. "And set the mirrors in place in advance, so that when you throw, it activates the mirrors."

"That might work," Digger says. "But what'll it do? Another hologram? Flasher's gotten wise to that; he's just started running though 'em."

"So we'll make a hologram of a door where there isn't one or something."

"Hah!" Digger exclaims. "And then he runs straight into it and bam! Just like Wile E. Coyote."

"Except for once it's the roadrunner getting bashed," Sam agrees, smirking at the mental image.

"Could be this work-together-on-plans crap idea's got something to it after all," Digger says. "I'm still going to tar and feather Cold's bed and tell him Heatwave did it."

Sam snorts. "Count me in on that."

They clink their beers together in agreement, then relax in silence for a few minutes, mulling the idea over.

"Maybe we could do something with some sort of portable light trap," Sam suggests. "Y'know, the way I set up with my mirrors, except attach 'em all to your lightning-fast boomerangs. That way we could catch the Flasher in mid-stride."

"Heh. That might trip him up."

"Not to mention bend him to our will."

"I like that one," Digger says admiringly. "Works for both of us. Say, do you still have that hypnosis glass? That stuff was great."

"You only say that 'cause you pulled a trick on me with them," Sam grumbles. Stupid Gotham. No one ever had any luck in Gotham.

"Nah! It was just cool. If we used it on a whole bunch of people in advance - maybe through my boomerangs going through a crowd - we could get 'em all in on attacking Flasher when he arrives."

Sam can't help but start to grin. "Digger," he drawls. "Are you suggesting that we attack the Flash with - a flash mob?"

Digger bursts out laughing. "Yeah," he says, still sniggering. "Guess I am."

Sam isn't much better. Maybe he's had too many of these beers - he wouldn't put it past Cold to spike them with something stronger, and given the taste and general quality of them, he's not sure he'd notice if they had been - but it's the funniest idea he's ever heard.

"We'll have to find a good job to do that with," he decides.

"You bet," Digger agrees enthusiastically. "I bet if we put our heads together, we can come up with some more really great ones like that."

"But not here," Sam decides, putting down the beer and looking suspiciously at the food. Sure, it all looks vacuum-sealed, but who knew where this general feeling of bonhomie came from? Even if it was with Digger, who he liked rather a bit more than the rest of the Rogues.

Quite a bit more, if the last few times they'd ended up in bed together stood for anything...huh. Maybe that's what Cold had been getting at, putting them in a room together? Some sort of matchmaker gig? It's been a while since they’d shacked up, and they’d both been getting kind of pissy around each other recently.

…nah.

"Where, then?" Digger asks.

"A bar," Sam decides, pulling out a pocket mirror to bust open the lock Cold had put on the door.

"Best idea you've had all night," Digger exclaims. "Let's go get pissed."

"No sooner said than done," Sam says, kicking open the door. "Let's go."

The first bar was great. As was the second one they visited after they got thrown out of the first one on account of getting a bit too rowdy with the other customers.

It took Digger until the third bar to start ragging on about Sam's color scheme the way he always did when he was particularly snozzled.

"Orange!" he groans. "And it's such a crap shade of orange, too -"

"I didn't pick it for the colors," Sam says, then smirks. He's pretty drunk, too. "Though I must say I look fine as hell in orange. Not everyone can pull that color off and still look good."

"It's prison orange, is what it is," Digger grumbles. "Gives me bad associations."

"Bad associations, huh? That's how you always end up in my bed, is it?"

"Usually my bed, y’mean," Digger shoots back, drunk enough for his usual paranoia over being queer to dissipate. "You're too damn prissy to want to worry about a wet spot in yours."

Still drunk enough to be bitchy, though.

Sadly, Sam finds Digger at his most bitchy weirdly attractive.

Clearly he's taken one too many hits to the head from the Flash.

"All right," Sam says agreeably. "I'm easy. Your bed, then. Tell me, is it the orange that lures you in?"

"No!"

Sam sniggers.

"And don't go saying you're easy," Digger continues, throwing an arm over his shoulders. "You're pretty hard to pull, you know that? Been trying for weeks."

"You mean I've been trying for weeks!" Sam exclaims. "You've been avoiding me."

"Have not."

"Have so."

"Have - whatever. Want to blow this joint?"

"Literally?" Sam asks, blinking at the bartender. There's two of him. Kind of like Multiple Man. Or maybe Sam's drunker than he thought. "Dunno, didn't think they were that bad."

Digger gives it serious consideration. "Nah," he finally says. "S'a good bar."

He reaches over and pats the bar the way one would a friendly dog.

Sam shakes his head. "Let's go home," he suggests.

"I thought you'd never ask," Digger replies. "Also, you totally missed a chance to make a 'hard' pun."

"Maybe I was saving it."

"Yeah, I bet you were."

"I'll have you know my skills extend pretty far on the light spectrum," Sam says. "Including my mastery of hard light."

Digger snorts. "And I'm a master of handling a stick. You wanna get out of here and have me to throw yours?"

"Not literally."

"No, not literally, you little -"

"Home sounds good," Sam says, lurching to his feet.

"Yeah," Digger says. "Sure does."

They even find time to steal some tar for Cold's bed on the way.

[dragongoddess13]

@dresupi

Hermione Granger X Fred Weasley

Prompt Theme: Smutty Halloween

Prompt: “This is usually the part in the slasher flick where the horny couple sneaks away from the group…follow me, unless you’re scared.”

Only one war AU, Everybody FUCKING lives!

xXx

Fred was beginning to regret letting Hermione talk him into a movie the week before. It was Halloween night and images of a psycho in a mask, wielding a knife and killing unsuspecting babysitters were flashing across his mind. George thought his jumpiness was the funniest thing he’d ever seen and had proceeded to tell pretty much anyone who would listen that the “innocent” little Gryffindor Princess had managed to scare Fred Weasley, one half of the newest Marauders. Professors Lupin and Black thought it was hilarious though Remus had been a lot kinder about it, hiding his amusement while Sirius had no qualms about laughing in his face with the rest of their friends.

Well the joke was on them now. Halloween had been heralded in with an escaped war criminal from Azkaban and the entirety of the school was on lockdown as Dementors prowled the grounds with Ministry officials. Sirius and Remus had been assigned to stay in Gryffindor tower for the night to keep an eye on everyone–other teachers had been assigned to the other house dorms as well– and Sirius, never one to let an opportunity fly by, took the advantage of the situation.

After dinner when it was announced that everyone would locked in for the night and under strict supervision, Sirius and Remus had snuck into the kitchens and convinced the house elves to pack up all sorts of halloween treats, which they brought back to Gryffindor tower, starting a little Halloween party of their own, complete with last minute costumes.

It had taken a bit of time but Fred had finally relaxed, putting aside slasher flick reruns to have a good time. That is until George thought it funny to sneak up on him in a white mask with carving knife transfigured from a quill. The entirety of the common room had a good laugh at his expense and Fred sequestered himself in the corner, refusing to let his back stay open for too long.

“Don’t you think you’re overreacting a bit?” Hermione asked as she took a seat beside him.

“There is a literal serial killer, newly escaped from prison on the loose. If that doesn’t scream Mick Michaels I don’t know what does.” Fred replied, more like huffed as if he were the only sane person left in the world.

“Mick Michaels?” Hermione looked confused and Fred couldn’t help but notice how unnatural that expression looked on her.

“Yeah, you know, the killer.”

“You mean Michael Myers?”

“Yes!” he exclaimed. “He’s out there, he could be anywhere.”

Hermione tried not to laugh, she really did, but the look of indignation was too much. “I’m sorry, I know it’s scary, but, consider this. We have two veteran wizards, both war heroes staying here tonight. Not to mention the countless, talented upper classmen, yourself included, that can handle themselves and protect the younger students. You have nothing to worry about. Besides the odds of Dolohov getting in here are slim to none, especially with all the Aurors, one of whom is James Potter, head Auror, and a fleet of Dementors surrounding the castle and grounds.”

Fred sighed. “I know you’re right but…” he shook his head. “No, I know you’re right.”

Hermione smiled, settling into his side and taking in the scene around the common room. Sirius and Remus were currently sitting in the far corner, Sirius regaling a group of students with tales of the Marauder’s exploits, undoubtedly exaggerated, during their own school years, while Remus looked thoroughly embarrassed as his students looked at him with unadulterated awe. Ron and Harry had started a game of truth or dare with Ginny, George and several other students with veritaserum, because sirius was the cool uncle, and Pumpkin juice, because Sirius was also a professor and he had to draw the line somewhere.

“You know,” Hermione began as she realized they weren’t being paid any attention by their housemates or teachers. “This is usually the part in the slasher flick where the horny couple sneaks away from the group.”  she continued standing up. “Follow me…unless you’re scared.”

[globally-english]

Singaporean English

Hello everyone! I hope you’re all doing well and studying hard. 

Today, I wanted to talk about English spoken in Singapore. It’s informally known as Singlish, so for simplicity’s sake we’ll call it that from now on. Oftentimes when we think of fluent English speakers, we think about British accents or American accents. I think it’s important to remember that English does not just come from the USA, Canada, the UK, or Australia. In fact, it comes from many different countries, big and small. So, if we go back to the question about fluent English speakers, we have one big area to cover in Asia. No one ever really considers the tiny country of Singapore. However, Singapore actually has a lot of very proficient English speakers. This includes the prime minister, Lee Hsien Loong, and even bloggers such as Wendy Cheng (also known as Xiaxue) or Ang Qiuting (better known as Bong Qiu Qiu). Wendy Cheng and Ang Qiuting both have very interesting accents, even from a native speaker’s point of view. They both tend to speak with the vocabulary of a native speaker, but the accent isn’t our typical image of one. This is because of Singlish. 

(Pictured: Wendy Cheng) 

Wendy Cheng is very well known online for being proud of being Singaporean. Part of her identity is the fact that she speaks Singlish. She even made a video discussing it, in which she talks about essential phrases, grammar, and swearing (although we will leave that out for now). The five essential phrases that she discusses are: lah, aiyoh, sian, siao, and wah lau eh. Upon doing further research, I learned that all of these words have their own origins and history behind their usage and how they entered Singlish. It’s really interesting to see how much a language can change because of surrounding languages; especially in a country like Singapore. Singapore is very multicultural, having large populations of Chinese, Malay, and Indian citizens, just to name a few. Later on in its history, it was occupied by Great Britain, which brought English to the tiny country. Therefore, all the languages that these populations brought over had a big influence on the already flexible English language, and it ended up creating the unique Singlish. The word lah is by far the most common of these Singlish words, and the funniest part about it is that it means nothing at all. All it is used for is to make a sentence seem more casual. For example, rather than a serious, “I can,” a Singaporean would say, “Can lah,” which makes it sound a lot more casual. 

In addition, Wendy Cheng talked about the influence that Mandarin has on Singlish. Mandarin is well known for being a very simple language, meaning that it gets rid of a lot of elements and strips a sentence to its bare minimum so that it can convey the meaning as quickly as possible. In Mandarin, to ask what time it is, one would say: “现在几点？ (Xiànzài jǐ diǎn?)” If you literally translate it, you would get: “Now what time?” This kind of sentence structure actually translates right over to Singlish, where Singaporeans ignore the super proper way of saying, “What time is it now?” Speaking of stripping to the bare minimum, that leads me to another thing that Singaporeans tend to do. Cheng talks about the phrases, “like that,” and, “I don’t want it.” Rather than pronouncing the words separately, Singaporeans tend to mix them into one word. They usually say, “liddat,” and, “dowan.” 

The last thing that Wendy Cheng mentions in her video about Singlish is the way Singaporeans pronounce things. When listening to her talk, it’s very easy to hear that if a word ends in a “d” or a “t,” she almost never pronounces it. In her video, she points out the word, “act.” Instead of pronouncing the “t” at the end, she simply says, “ac.” 

It’s really interesting to see how different Singaporean English is from Standard English, be it American or British. I think it’s really important to learn about different varieties of one’s language, and Singaporean English is a very good place to start. 

For any readers from Singapore: what other aspects of Singlish do you think are important for foreigners to know? And for any readers who have never heard of Singlish: what do you think about this dialect? Do you think you’d like to learn more about it? 

Thank you for reading, and I hope you all continue learning. See you soon, lah!