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#i think it's just so hot he just does not care for to play
stormyelliotwritez · 3 days
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do u think that like dating poolverine would you meet one over the other first or both at the same time and like how would that happen like omg the thoughts in my brain are thinking so hard rn. like. who falls first. how do yall get tgt. that kinda stuff.
i feel like theres so many ways this could go but i wanna hear your opinions… c:
okay okay okay, i have thoughts and thanks for this!!!
so if you’re a merc/hero like them and you meet after dp&w:
you meet deadpool first and you guys playfully flirt and you against your better judgement find yourself falling for him
hes oblivious af coz he can’t stop thinking about wolvie
he invites you over for like dinner and some drinks coz he wants wolvie to make friends
logan can smell the want and the affection on you and he can hear your heartbeat racing when you talk to them
he tells wade and it clicks for him and he realizes wait he can like you too so he falls for you and then logan does too
you get together by play flirting and then it becoming real flirting and then they’re inviting you to stay the night and soon enough you’re moving in and being cuddled all the time
if you’re in the void and you’re like a hero ig
they meet you in the building with elektra and gambit and blade and laura
you’ve been there so long that you don’t even care about romance and all that coz who has the time when smoke tries to eat you
wades so taken in by everything that he doesn’t really notice you but logan does and hes like damn that guys hot and emotionally dead so just his type
he starts initiating conversations and flirting with you like an old man by offering you a beer and teasing you
if you die at cassandra’s, he asks b-15 to bring you back and them wade falls for you when he sees how you and logan are so good for each other
if you go with them to go to wades home, wade falls for you when you help them fight the other hims (totally not mostly coz you’re hot when you fight)
you three get together after the events of the movie when you and logan have moved in with wade and it just kinda happens
If you’re their neighbor:
wade sees you around and mentions you to logan every so often
they kinda stalk you, well normal people would call it stalking but they just make sure you get home safe and nobody annoys you
after a while, you start noticing them around and you end up with a crush on them
so if you make it look like someones scaring you, then that’s your own business
they save you and then Wade immediately starts flirting with you and logans just like wanna have a beer and like any slightly not sane person, you say yes to the two men who’ve technically been stalking you
you guys get together by just the normal way of talking, then going on dates and then dating
those are what i can think of at the moment but if anyone wants to know my opinion of how you’d get with them in other scenarios, please ask me!!!!
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Psycho Husband!Steve Rogers who is a crazed coercive bastard.
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Warning(s): Noncon, misogyny/sexism, depraved housewife kink, head shaving/hair cutting, he's a mental mf who thinks he is only doing what's best for you; cruel punishments are care and better sense according to him, age gap, fear kink, infantilization, humiliation, size kink. MDNI. 
. . .
You meekly sit atop your husband, Steve Rogers' lap as he feeds himself and you the dinner you meticulously prepared for him as he cares greatly for detail and perfection. 
The older man hums with each bite, one large paw caressing your back from over the thin -nearly sheer- material of one of the many dresses that make up the entirety of your wardrobe. 
“Absolutely delicious, baby, good job” he has been praising you with each bite and so you cannot help but smile at the compliments, your smaller body resting against his as you gently comb his hair with your fingers.
This is good.
Him being pleased is good.
“Thank you, my heart” you kiss his cheek that he had shaved just this morning when you were on your knees getting rid of his morning wood. He usually does that at night but you chose to wear a certain dress yesterday that caused for you to remain trapped in bed from the moment he got home till the both of you woke up tangled and sticky.
“See?” Now his fingers silkily glide up the length of your spine, past its dents that appear on your nape and towards your scalp that holds no barriers between your skins. “Wasn't I right?” Steve's fingertips flex all over your shiny head that he keeps empty from any hurdle between yourself and him. “Didn't it make things all better for us, hm?” Your tongue grows heavy and you feel it beginning to swell.
But you must not speak your mind.
For you are not allowed to have one.
“Yes, hubby, you were” you feel him stroke the bald crown of your head and the feeling of his coarse skin rubbing your soft and moisturized one sends shivers down your spine. 
His dark but relaxed blue eyes watch you, outwardly friendly but secretly inspecting you closely for the tiniest slip up. “Just too stupid to see it back then, weren't you?”
You nod nervously, offering him a smile as you avert your gaze from his, choosing to awkwardly play with his dress shirt instead. “Yes, hubby, I was.” Before you look up momentarily. He hates it when you don't look at him while speaking. “Thank you for teaching me better.” 
“And what did I teach you?” You bite your tongue, his words scalding your ears. 
Of course, he wants you to say it.
It is a routine that he likes to do every night. 
“That you are always right because you know better.” You resist the urge to cringe from how he suddenly gives you a burst of praise head rubs. 
It is a trap, meant to set you off.
He knows you don't like his hand rubbing your bald head like you're some kind of an animal and he still does it.
You've made the mistake of fighting back one too many times in the past.
But now you know it never fares well for you.
So better to just obey.
“Yeah?” His eyes begin to dance all over your form in that lewd fashion of theirs. “And how did I teach you that?” This is nothing new, and yet your heart drops.
“You taught me by…” Your face becomes hot from the embarrassment and humiliation. “B- By…” Fuck.
Even after all this time, it's no easier to do it. 
“By?” You can feel his sick arousal poke into the back of your thigh. He shifts to readjust himself. “Know what, honey?” He actually has the gall to sound friendly like he's doing you a favor out of the goodness of his heart. “I'll help your little mind out by giving you a hint.” You cannot hold his gaze anymore. So you drop your eyes and train them on his collars as you whimper into his cheek from how he hugs you closer with the arm he has draped around you. He loves proximity. “It had something to do with a machine and a cute head” his long fingers caress your scalp in circular motions.
Your heart is erratic against his chest. “H–” the whimper you let out is shaky and pathetic. Your expression falters into one of pain but you recover just as fast. At least on the outside. “T- Taught me by shaving my head.”
Steve's smirk is one of pride. “Oh? And what setting did I shave it on? Did I leave anything behind or did you become a complete cueball?” 
Tears sting your eyes from the sensitivity and helplessness as you feel your throat tighten even more. “N- No, hubby. Nothing was left. You shaved it all off…” Closing your eyes momentarily is the only way you can let out your next words. “Until I was a cueball.”
“And why was that, huh, baby?” Now he speaks to you like you're a child. 
He does that when he is horny. 
The realization makes your stomach twist.
“B- Because you warned me many times but—” your voice breaks and you softly sob into his cheek all of a sudden because the memories overwhelm you. “I didn't l- listen and my hair kept getting in the food I would prepare for you.” He somberly cooes and lowers your head forwards in a submissive position to caress the links of your spine.
“Oh, honey. Is that what happened?” Though Steve rests his cheek atop your bald head that he keeps shiny with scented oils and feigns sadness his bulge is too stiff against your tender skin for his little act to hold any weight. 
“Yes, hubby.” Your tears fall on your lap. 
“And how did it happen, huh, darling?” He loves the helplessness of your situation. That has got to be it. “Can you tell me?”
You nod and swallow the bile in your throat. Denial is not an option. “The scary razor went all over my head, hubby” you make yourself sound like a baby because that's what he likes. “Like buzz buzz buzz~” you try to mimic the sound and gesture as you run a pretend trimmer over your naked scalp. 
“Aw, it was scary for your little baby self, was it?” You timidly nod, pouting a little. “That's because you're so small and easily scared, aren't you?” He presses kisses all over your head and pinches your cheek. 
“Yes, hubby.” 
“Aw, my poor girl” he cups your face and lets his thumb trace the shape of your mouth. “I get it, you’re just a baby” he cannot but kiss you deeply before speaking again. 
“But it was necessary, wasn't it? And it worked” it is typical of him to seek validation for his unhinged actions from you, probably helps him sleep easier and pumps his pompousness further. “No more hair in the food.” He smiles and forces you to look at him by tipping your head back.
“No more hair in the food.” You echo him like the hollow doll he has made of you.
“Awww” he chuckles at the dejection in your voice. “Cheer up, silly. You look just as perfect as the first moment I laid my eyes on you” his lips repeatedly peck yours for a few moments. Then he continues. “I am the only one whose opinion matters for you and I think you're the most gorgeous thing alive” he scoops you up in his arms before standing up and you give him a smile like you're supposed to. He leans in to capture it in his own. “The cueball only makes you sexier and more nude for me. So it's a win all around” you whimper into the words he utters against your mouth. “C'mon, hubby will make you feel all better.” He whispers before carrying you to the bedroom. It is impossible not to be aware of your devastation and that is why he offers compensation the way he does. “Yeah?”
All you can do is nod defeatedly.
. . .
If you made it down here, hi you're cool. 
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stars-tonight · 3 days
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100 REASONS
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tw: depressed!reader
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he sees your struggle.
he sees the bags under your eyes, which themselves are swollen and puffy from crying. he sees you zone out in class, head propped up on your hand as you gaze out the window. you seem so at peace, so tranquil, but occasionally you’ll frown and crease your eyebrows, and a look of pain crosses your face. he wants to wipe it away, to hug you and hold you until your worries go out the door. but he doesn’t know how to approach you. you’ve never really talked to each other, but he’s noticed you a long time ago. he doesn’t like thinking of you being sad, but reality often sucks. and here you are in front of him, fading away, and he can’t seem to do anything about it.
fine, he decides. if i can’t comfort them through words or touch, i’ll do it through action. 
the next day when you come into school, there’s a glass jar on your desk. [y/n], reads a sticker carefully pasted across the front. you study it warily before taking it into your hands as you sit down. inside is a bunch of folded paper cranes. you take one curiously--you’ve never been very good at origami--and study it. it’s folded carefully; you can tell a lot of effort went into making it. you smile a little, and you’re about to put it down when you notice something on the inside. it looks like a pen mark, so you hesitantly unfold the paper crane.
9. your eyes are so pretty.
you frown at the note. it’s written neatly, in black pen. you unfold another one: 84. i love your laugh.
your heart skips a beat. the teacher comes in and starts class, and you hastily shove both pieces of unfolded paper into your folder, carefully tucking the jar into your backpack.
you finish reading all the papers when you get home. there are a hundred in total, each with a little note for you. they range from you are so smart to you always help others without asking for anything in return. with each one you read, your heart feels a little lighter. you don’t know who could be so kind to make this for you, but they must have seen that you weren’t doing so good. you feel like crying. you didn’t think anyone cared about you enough to notice you were struggling, let alone do something about it to make you feel better.
there’s an actual note, folded into a square, thrown into the jar too. [y/n], it reads. i couldn’t help but notice that these last few days, you seemed really tired. take a break, okay? eat good food, go for a walk, listen to your favorite music. take a long shower, play with a pet, read your favorite book. do all the things that make you happy. it will be okay. forgive me for being too scared to tell you this face-to-face, but everything i want to say i’ve written in these paper cranes. take one out any time you’re feeling sad and read it. together, they make up a hundred reasons why i love you. and remember you are not alone. whenever you’re feeling like you’re alone in this big, cruel world, remember that there’s a boy, just a dumb, lovesick boy, who knows and loves you.
the next day, he sees you come into the classroom looking considerably happier. he can’t help but smile seeing you happy. if his gift cheered you up even a little, it was all worth it. do you know it was him who spent all night folding those paper cranes for you? probably not. does he care?
definitely not.
SUNA RINTARŌ, AKAASHI KEIJI, kita shinsuke, SUGAWARA KŌSHI, iwaizumi hajime, miya osamu, YAMAGUCHI TADASHI, AZUMANE ASAHI
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A/N: not doing so hot so i’m writing this when i should be studying for an anatomy quiz
update: by the time i posted this i'm back home after school; i think the quiz went well lol
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st4rpiece · 1 day
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nipple piercings pt. 1
NSFW
characters: luffy, zoro, and sanji x fem! reader summary: the monster trios reaction to your new nipple piercings content warnings: established relationships, nipple sucking, breast play others: lowercase intended, not proofread, pictures from pinterest
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Monkey D. Luffy
you had recently gotten them done, so while they healed, you wore thin clothing instantly drawing luffy's attention. he was immediately fascinated by your new piercings.
he'd probably poke at them with a childlike curiosity, his eyes wide with wonder. "wow, these are so cool! do they hurt?" he'd ask, genuinely intrigued. surprisingly, as you explain the sensation and the reason behind getting them, luffy would listen intently, absorbing every word.
as the days went by, luffy would occasionally bring up the piercings in conversations, always with the same level of excitement. "babe, show me those cool piercings again," he'd say, his eyes sparkling with interest. he'd honestly never get tired of seeing them.
your first time fucking after getting them ignited a side of luffy you rarely saw in bed. luffy was extra careful and attentive as his hands trailed up your body before resting on your breast. his calloused hands cupping them as his thumb softly ran across the piercing, tracing its outline.
"does it feel good?" you nod, back arching, pushing your breast further into his hands. without warning he'd roughly flick the piercings, soaking in your reaction with a mischievous grin.
"i wonder how they taste," he'd say before leaning in to give them a teasing lick, his warm breath sending shivers down their spine. the saltiness of your skin mixed with the metallic taste of the metal bar tasted so good. he licked, sucked, and bit, giving your nipple the attention they deserved.
Roronoa Zoro
zoro would have a more intense reaction to your new piercings. you quickly ran to go show him the minute you and nami returned back to the sunny. you found him resting against the headboard of your shared bed.
his eye opened the second you entered the room, waiting for a kiss (something you always do after returning to him) instead you just stood there at the foot of the bed with a mischievous grin.
"what?" he'd asked, instead of answering you lifted up your shirt and showed off your new piercings.
he would stare intently at your bare tits and the contrasting silver bar with a playful smirk on his lips. "didn't think you had it in you," he'd tease, his voice a deep rumble laced with arousal.
"come here, i want to get a better look," the second you are close, he would pull you over his lap in a straddling position. while his hands rested on your hip, his eyes never left your breast. he wanted nothing more than to take them into his mouth and hear how you sounded to a new sensation. but first, he had to make sure you were okay. be began throwing questions at you.
did it hurt?
how much did they cost?
and lastly, how sensitive are you right now?
once he knows that you are okay, his grip on your waist will tighten, pulling your body closer.
without reserve, his lips would pepper you with kisses trailing from your neck down to the piercings, giving them a gentle tug with his teeth. causing you to grip his hair releasing a moan from the sensation, one he hadn't heard before.
"mmh, i like that," he'd grunt against their skin, his breath hot and tantalizing. "these suit you well, baby." his voice husky as he lifted his eyes wanting to watch your reactions closely as his fingers tugged and pulled on one while his mouth bit and sucked on the other. his eyes darken with lust as he takes in the pleasure written on their face.
Vinsmoke Sanji
before parting ways with nami you tell her to send a message to sanji about you needing him in your room. you sat on the bed, nervous and excited ready to show sanji how you spent your evening.
sanji, ever the romantic, would be utterly captivated by your new piercings. "holy shit baby," his eyes would widen in surprise and admiration, a very noticeable blush spreading across his face. "how did you manage to make yourself even hotter," he'd say, his voice filled with genuine awe.
"may i?" you nodded, even though you were still pretty sore, you craved his touch. he'd gently cup you breasts, his fingers brushing over the piercings with a feather-light touch. loving the contrast between your soft warm skin against the cool metal bar.
his touch would become more confident, his fingers teasing the piercings with a mix of tenderness and desire. causing you to let out a kitten-like moan. which further turns him on, "i want to make you feel incredible," he'd whisper, his breath warm against your skin.
his lips would follow the path of his fingers, kissing and licking around the piercings, his touch sending waves of pleasure through your body. "look at how swollen these bud are," he says, pinching your nipples harder.
"sanji," you managed to moan out.
"hold on my love, i'm just getting started," with lips still attached to your breast, his hands toy with the band of your shorts, dipping inside skimpy underwear.
_____
I just wanted to thank everyone for reading and liking my work >.<. it means a lot!!
I'm working on part 2 atm (kidd, killer, and law) and might get that up tmr :) still, I hope you guys enjoyed this one!!
in the meantime, feel free to check out my kidd one shot >.<!
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sturniolowhore · 1 day
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Caught
Pairing: softdom!chris x sub!reader
Summary: You and the triplets were watching a movie, when Chris pulled you onto his lap.
Warnings: SMUT, getting caught, p in v, and more.
a/n: Enjoy! Not proofread
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You and the triplets were watching a movie in the living room. It was mostly quiet, except for the movie and the thunderstorm outside. Occasionally you’ll hear a boom if thunder, but it would go away pretty quickly. You were sitting at the edge next to Chris. Nick and Matt were sitting in the other side of Chris.
Suddenly, Chris pulled you onto his lap at the next boom of thunder.
“What the fuck?” You whisper yell.
“What? I just want you on my lap.” He whispers back.
“Whatever, but if you try anything, I’ll smack the shit outta you.” You say trying to ignore the hot arousal beginning to form.
“Oh really? I don’t think so.” He whispers.
“Can you two shut the fuck up and watch the movie?” Nick whispers to us, not looking in our direction.
“Sorry.” I whisper back.
You move around a bit trying to get comfortable, but also teasing Chris in a way.
“Stop moving!” He whisper yells. He grabs your hips to stop you from moving more.
“Why? Did I tease you a bit too much?” You whisper back.
“No.. I .. just don’t like when you keep moving.” He whispers nervously.
“Yeah whatever.” You roll your eyes.
You feel a hard object beneath you and you brush it off, thinking it’s his phone.
“Chris! Take your phone out of your pocket!” You whisper yell to him again.
“That’s not my phone.” He whispers back.
“Oh..” you whisper when you realize what it really is.
“Hey, I’m really tired. I think I’m going to go to sleep now.” Chris announces to the others.
“Yeah.. me too. I think I’ll sleep over tonight. Is that okay with you guys?” Nick and Matt nodded their head, not really caring, a bit distracted from us with the movie playing.
You and Chris head downstairs to his room. As you walk in, Chris locks the door behind you two. He turns around and kisses you furiously. His tongue enters your mouth, deepening the kiss. He pulls away and takes of his sweats and boxers. His cock springs free, hitting him in the stomach.
You take off your shirt and sweats as he does this. He walks over to you, taking his shirt off and laying you down in the bed, gently.
He kisses your neck and peppers kisses all the way over to your inner thighs, getting closer to your dripping core.
He takes your panties off, slowly. As he does this, he looks up at you. Once your panties are off, he kisses your clit gently, still looking up at you. Soon he began to lick and suck at your clit. He slipped two fingers inside you, curling them to hit the right spot. You let out load moans and whimpers. His hand flies up to you mouth to cover all the noises you were making. You grip his hair, not wanting him to stop.
You feel the knot in your stomach forming. Your back arches as you scream out his name, it being muffled bu Chris’s hand.
You come undone all over his fingers. He takes them out gently, and flips you over so your laying in your stomach. He pushes into you gently, and lets out a groan.
“Shit.. you’re so tight..” Chris groans again.
You let out a moan. His thrusts get faster, and soon he’s pounding into you. You let out load moans and squeals. Chris’s hand moves to your mouth. He sticks out two fingers for you to suck on. You take his fingers into your mouth. You know it’ll keep you quiet.
You feel another knot forming in your stomach. Chris can tell your close from you clenching around him.
"Clenching around me so tight.. Fuck.." he groans, his thrusts becoming sloppy.
"Close.." you moan out, taking his fingers your your mouth. You feel the knot snap in your stomach and let out a loud moan. Chris's cock has a white ring around the base from the mess you made. With that, Chris pulls out of you and comes all over your ass and lower back. He groans at the sight of his come on you.
He grabs a wet rag from the bathroom, and wipes his come off of you and cleans you up. You borrow one of chris's hoodies and sweats to wear to bed. Chris's phone lights up with a message from Matt. "Tired huh?" is what the message read with a picture of you laying on your stomach with chris's come on your ass and back, with chris still behind you.
Your eyes widen, seeing the picture.
"MATT!" You yell. You and chris can both hear the giggles coming from Matt and Nick.
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a/n 2: Hope you enjoyed! This was a bit rushed and honestly i don't know if i fw it but i guess it's okay.
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queenlua · 2 days
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hey. hey. what mtg deck would naesala play?
Naesala doesn’t play Magic: the Gathering.  what do you think he is, some kind of nerd?
…that’s what he says, at least. except, at some point, Leanne gets her hands on some cards & omigosh there are ANGELS on here and they’re so pretty!!! & so now she has an ANGELS DECK & she wants Naesala to play, so he’s like “fine i guess”
(this is when they’re all still young and precious and adorable.  also: Ice Age is the hot new set of cards in town.  no one is actually good at Magic yet, the only way you learn the rules is via exciting rumors on the playground, the metagame advances at the pace of a monthly Scrye magazine subscription, etc)
ANYWAY.  Naesala starts out just playing whatever pile of cards Leanne hands to him & is perfectly happy getting rolled by her; he’s really treating it as a social hanging-out kinda thing, kinda like pinochle or whatever
except then Reyson makes a whole THING of it, y’know.  he shows up with his own aggressively handcrafted green/white deck and he’s going to BEAT Naesala and that’s going to make him stop bugging LEANNE.  (i mean, it won’t, but insert whatever adolescent boy logic you like here)
Naesala doesn’t care that much about winning either way, but he *is* a horrible troll and enjoys rankling Reyson
so that’s when he bothers walking into an Actual Hobby Shop for the first time (taking care not to touch anything more than he has to) (when is the last time anyone dusted this place or wiped down a counter, gross) & he asks if they have a copy of The Official Rules & he then proceeds to read them cover-to-cover
and thus, the following week, he’s the one that breaks the news to Reyson, mid-game, that regeneration can’t save your creatures from Wrath of God & Reyson is PISSED.  “that’s not fair” “it’s the rules” “you hafta SAY that first” “sorry Reyson but your river boa is dead” etc etc insert childish squabbling here
anyway.  fast-forward a bunch of years + one genocide later, and, dang, it’s been a while since Naesala and Reyson talked, huh?
Naesala hasn’t touched the game much in the interim.  i mean, he’s played some, because he’s got this one annoying underling who’s really into it, and part of being a good leader is very occasionally letting your hair down & letting everyone dunk on you in some goofy multiplayer MtG game in the mess hall.  so he has a couple gimmicky decks he’s thrown together for casual play.  he’s got a Relentless Rats + Thrumming Stone deck.  he’s got a goofy Tinker deck—he put it together when he was REALLY out of the loop, and thought he’d discovered this great new combo no one else had noticed—he was pissed when he learned that card had been banned, like, two years ago, dude.
but his main deck is this black/white weenie deck that he’s cobbled together over the years—it’s charmingly old school but still holds up reasonably well.  it’s got Hypnotic Specter and Order of the Ebon Hand and Order of the White Shield and Hymn to Tourach, and he’s thrown in a Stromgald Crusader and a Damnation and such over time, it doesn’t exactly adhere to good modern deck design principles but it generally puts in a respectable showing.
meanwhile, Reyson has gotten *way* too into MtG—like, uncomfortably into it. have you ever had a friend who got Way Into A Particular Hobby Because They Were Clearly Desperately Unhappy About Something Else In Their Life? And They’re Trying To Tell You About All This Insane Hobby Drama That They’re WAY Too Invested In And You’re Trying To Find A Subtle Way To Tell Them Bro Get A Little Bit Of A Life Please?  yeah, that.
i mean, it’s understandable!!!  he can’t possibly compete with the hawks in all their reindeer games, dude just literally does not have the muscle, but there is a decent contingent of hawks that are pretty into MtG so he is determined to dominate there.
Reyson is not a natural talent at the game, but he’s a total grind, so he is in fact the most dominant MtG player on all of Phoenicis.  so when Naesala shows up in Phoenicis for the first time in years and years, and Reyson's got all these Unresolved Feelings about that whole deal, of course he challenges Naesala to a game of MtG, yugioh frenemy style, to test his friendship mettle or something
Reyson’s playing a ridiculously aggro red/black deck.  i’m thinking some good filthy gargadon rakdos.  just on and on and on the attack
so Naesala gets out his charmingly old school black/white weenie deck, kinda rolling his eyes, but sure he’ll give Reyson a game if he wants a game, no Reyson he doesn’t know if it’s a standard legal deck or not but it’s the deck he’s got, will you shut up and just play—
and Reyson’s mostly dominating, but Naesala’s doing his level best to hang in there, and the match comes to a rather dramatic climax when Naesala manages to stabilize during one of the games & he taps out to cast a 5-mana big boi—
and, yeah, of course Naesala’s janky old school black/white deck has a Serra’s Angel as a win condition & yeah it’s the exact same one Leanne gifted him years and years ago & they both know it.
they end the game pretty quickly & awkwardly after that & neither of them remembers who actually won.
(wow this Naesala guy is such a simp.  god this is such a fucking cheesy moment.  i hate this, hold on, i’m gonna go throw up in my mouth a little… OKAY i’m back.)
ANYWAY.  all that plays out, doot dee doo, fast forward to post-Radiant Dawn:
* Reyson’s a very happy red/white Boros player these days.  he has chilled out a little bit but is still pretty easy to bait into getting Mad And Competitive again.  (Tibarn frequently does this because it’s kind of cute when Reyson’s pissed about magical cards) ((Tibarn’s decks are absolute piles, oh my god.  just the most janky barely-functional Timmy stuff imaginable. someone explain the concept of a mana curve to this poor man))
* Leanne still likes ANGELS!!!! & also white weenie stuff & also cute stuff generally.  despite her benign appearance & her weakness for playing Cute Stuff over Good Stuff, she’s a more naturally talented player than Reyson & has just enough of a killer instinct to generally come out on top
* Naesala favors black, and mostly just tries to figure out whatever deck he can play to troll his local meta, but he’s still got that black/white deck in a sentimental drawer somewhere.
also: look, i don’t play Commander nearly enough to provide any substantive commentary on that front, but… my very first instinct, when i read this question, was: “this bitch would definitely run Braids, Cabal Minion as his commander.”  except i looked it up and apparently Braids is Very Banned In Commander.  boo.  does the format ban fun, too.  c’mon, let a dude ruin everyone’s game every once in a while!!!  i think Naesala is equally pissed about Braids being banned is what i’m saying
so yeah that is my complete theory of Naesala And Magic The Gathering lol
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Anyways the “essay” about the energy sword to character development pipeline below the cut
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Ok so like yea tucker-crunchbite-junior is, obviously, the first instance of the sword-quest-companion theme/trio that im like, rattling in my head rn
Tucker finds the sword, crunchbite shows up and theres the “quest” that challenges tucker both in the false intent (you need to be the hero) and the true intent (SA leading to Junior which is not handled well but it IS important) which is a push against tucker’s character thus far in that he’s the comic relief, make everything a sex joke archetype— he doesnt take it seriously, he doesnt see himself as important beyond getting just enough recognition to be “hot” and now he’s made to be the so called “hero” and the true plot puts him in the one position that he probably never thought could be him. Bc he wants to get laid so… yeah. Pushes his character if you give it like three seconds of critical thinking and not just the standard “haha alien baby bullshit” (that said, i do enjoy fics that explore crunchbite more and play with the potential of the “joke” shitty character into someone less sinister, but im doin my best to stick to canon rn)
And JUNIOR, oh man, because theres the thing that really solidifies this for me like
The dude who doesnt care doesnt bother is all jokes and ‘man whatever’ energy is a dad, and it starts with him trying to avoid it but he really fucking quickly steps the FUCK up for Junior and its the start of his development that people are like “oh he learns to be a leader on chorus” which i mean kinda yeah but he never struck me as a Leader even on Chorus even tho he does decidedly lead, its not the same as when kimball leads or when wash leads or carolina
He’s leads as a dad bc he is a dad
Not always a good one, but he’s trying and yea sometimes that means being the asshole, sometimes that means screwing up but it also means you fucking care and you take responsibility and you put yourself in danger first (the rescue mission, leaving the lieutenants behind)
And that doesnt start on chorus! Its the most evident there sure but
it starts with junior
It starts with him going after tex to protect his son, it starts with him trying to be a diplomat so they stay together, in sending junior away so he is safe while tucker buys time protecting the temple, it STARTS with him looking at church and going “leave my kid out of this” and yeah the way rvb was written and approached does Not take that seriously bc it wouldnt and if it did it would be a very different show but the implications are there and its acknowledged with tucker’s photograph of junior with his 5th grade basketball team (“i know right? Who carries actual pictures anymore” -tucker) which i could go on about THAT too but suffice to say its very clear that tucker cares so gd much about his kid and yeah his character development isnt super linear but you can basically pinpoint when it starts with the sword and junior
The second run of this trio of things is actually grif which is admittedly, a stretch, a big ol reaching for straws (okay, TECHNICALLY grif is the third run, but i’ll address that in a minute) largely a stretch bc grif… does the pattern backwards
This IS S16 stuff so if ur a shisno paradox hater i respect that, i however am gnawing on it with everything i have and will be going feral so this is your warning thank u for reading the tucker side of it mwah appreciate ya
Anyways
Grif does his plot backwards during timetravel shenanigans
He gets the alien companion/friend who contrasts his character first in Huggins
Grif is a loyal friend, but he is lazy, even after s15’s breakdown and apparent change of tune, he’s still looking to take the path of least resistance, avoiding the call, trying to keep things from moving
Enter Huggins: zippy, full of energy, excitable and just so different in that she is not only so proactive she puts herself in danger (which helps everyone in the long run/plot but its the principle) but shes so fucking lonely
As far as she knows, her family is dead, except for muggins who is so dettached from her, he might as well be a coworker and not her brother
Compared to grif, who has a family even when he tries to push them away (the reds, the blues, KAIKAINA) but hates taking action
Huggins is the start for grif’s arc of “it sucks but someones gotta do it” which in their case is best shown as the trudge across the bottom of the english channel which is so fucking funny to me but it really pushes both of them and puts them firmly in the friends category
Huggins cant zip ahead without grif, grif cant stop moving because huggins wont let him, so they find their little balance of gas vs brakes and together they cruise along p well
The actual push of the “quest” is grif having to be the one who steps up (kinda like tucker but its to the left) he’s the one who starts getting everyone together again across the timeline, even if he is very,,,
Well he’s very Grif about it, but it is still fundamentally, the change in character
Tucker isn’t a always good dad, Grif isn’t always a good instigator of action
But theyre trying and theyre working on it and grif’s arc suffers a Little from being so late in the show and thus not having much of a parallel to pull on but you could argue he gets the parallel from s15 anyways with the refusal of the call (from fake church/loco) and rescue mission but i hesitate to call that a parallel bc its literally back to back but an argument could be made for it which i love
Enter part two: the alien quest giver
“Wait wasnt that huggins”
NOPE huggins was alien companion! The Bestie in grif’s case,
The alien fetch quest comes from atlas, in that stupid wishing sequence but cmon it wouldnt be rvb if the character development wasnt sandwiched inbetween obnoxious gags and stupidity
The quest is less important here admittedly bc again, with grif doing this in reverse its not the challenge to his principle character that it was for tucker, his connection to huggins was the challenge, and this becomes the final push into the development, the “you have a role, now play it” that gives grif the final shove into Doing Things literal!! And his prize? For this character development arc? An alien sword
And thus the inverse version reaches an end, sort of (im pissed that technically he loses his sword, im also ignoring that he loses it in canon bc he fucking earned it okay this is a bit of canon i will ignore and loophole my way around it)
And now we track back to Chorus and to the second iteration of the sword-quest-companion plot
Locus
Now okay i will admit this is conjecture and pepe-silvia-on-corkboard-with-red-string fuckery at this point but hear me out okay!
He gets the sword with Felix’s death. We know this. What we dont know is how the fucking hell he gets off Chorus! We just see him show up later with A’rynasea. The vaguely alien (maybe sentient?? AI? Its implied with the way he addresses her but we literally have her for like two episodes) ship that seems to be the driving force (literal) (bc shes his ship) behind his chosen redemption arc where he pushes himself to help others at no apparent benefit to himself, but because it is, and i quote “the right thing to do”
Arguably, Santa could be Locus’ quest giver, seeing as how he is the one who triggers the whole shift in view for Locus in the first place and that is, technically, what crunchbite does and what atlas finalizes for grif! But the problem is we simply dont have enough of A’rynasea to draw the parallel between her and Locus as personalities, as companions for it to work for me??? But that might just be me overthinking? But it does make Locus’ version is a bit messier depending on who you consider his quest-giver but as far as I’m concerned, he’s still on his quest snd its just up to interpretation if A’rynasea is his companion?? or if theres a secret third alien for Locus that we never wouldve seen even if they planned for that bc its red vs blue and im just delusional about locus and his role in plot and this is just me firing concepts blindly into the sky at this point like - yeah i could still theorize what kind of companion characterization i think locus would work well with bc its more about the wielder than the companion in this sense (sorry junior and huggins i love yall i promise) but thats a completely separate rant at this point and not nearly coherent enough at this exact moment to add it PLUS its ridiculously self indulgent and only marginally canon compliant/adjacent but i will never not be amused by this very specific plot beat happening enough to draw these parallels, as tenuous and vague as the parallels are
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bellamer · 10 hours
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I’m gonna start posting images of like what I mean for my body headcanons for BG3 characters so like
Halsin: Built like John Goodman from when he played Fred Flinstone or Dan Connor, tall, big, imposing but still very gentle giant and Dan Connor is kinda what I mean when I mean fatjacked, John Goodman is what I think of when I think “built like an actual bear” so like just John Goodman in general for Halsin since his weight and shape fluctuates and I think Halsin’s does too depending on the season
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Astarion: David Bowie, Thin White Duke describes Astarion to a T so like yeah. Obvious as hell if I do say so myself
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Karlach: Already said she’s built like Jackie from Love Lies Bleeding or for another comparison Rhea Ripley. Just like 15% to 20% bigger
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Shadowheart: The closest thing I could find that describes how I think she’s built is Marylin Monroe in these pictures but like 15% to 20% more body fat if that makes sense ?
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Gale: I’m a firm fat Gale believer and people don’t like that but I don’t really care so but I’ve already headcanoned Gale as being built like John Candy, Chris Farley and most recently Matt Berry and I can’t find pictures of any of them shirtless besides Chris Farley and any photos I find of him in the Chippendales skit is very low quality so here’s the best one. And I know certain people don’t find fat bodies attractive but I’m not one of them so while this skit was meant to be a joke targeting fat people, his body is just as hot to me as everyone else on this list.
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Wyll: Anthony Mackie. He has the muscles, the waist and the cake. Nothing more to be said. Exactly what I think of when I think of Wyll. Just maybe 5% smaller
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To be continued because I have to find a picture for Lae’Zel because I can’t find any examples of bottom heavy yet flat chested celebrities to use as an example like it’s actually aggravating and annoying because I know they exist. Like Shadowheart was a struggle too because I don’t even headcanon Marylin as her body type, it’s just the closest example I could find. Gale was also a struggle but I just settled on it.
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qyriaha · 3 months
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partially catsitting for my cousin & like the whole thing was he's so clingy our neighbour is taking care of him but can u come over & play w him every few days this guy does Not care that i'm here
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musubiki · 6 months
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danmarch 🐉💎
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muirneach · 3 months
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sasha andrey halle 2023 was such a funny final. guy who doesn’t care and is surprised he even got to where he is vs guy who cares so fucking much and will die if he doesn’t win. and still sasha won.
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dirt-str1der · 1 year
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Yaoi has poisoned all of your fucking brains !!
#Yakuza HATEblog#i dont want to hear about the new yakuza trailer where kiryu proposed to soemone he wouldnnever do that thats so scary#also they refered to sayama as the cop lady like please show some respect to her she didnt be annoying for you to forget her#ive become homophobic now because i hated seeing a particular post so much like that will never happen you are crazy#like no this isnt how kzmj can win they have never even once considered a future together because kiryus foreplanning ended when he lost#his brother and majima has spent half her life waiting for saejima to come back like they have more important things to worry about#and kiryu is not able to share his kids with anybody he cant simultaneously raise haruka with someone he has to either be a single dad or an#absent dad no in between and sometimes haruka is left parentless in the middle of that mess but its not kiryus problem hes driving cars amd#beating people up .... well he does care sorry for insinuating he doesnt ... he thinks about his kids every day#but i guarantee you he does not think about majima every day i swear it to you he does not care about her that much !!! i have to forever#stress this doesnt mean that he hates majima but it simply means that shes not his priority AND SHE WILL NEVER BE !!! kiryu will never#risk it all just for a suckle on that majiwilly like he doesnt like her that much ... if kiryu didnt even give majima so much as a phonecall#when he was ignoring her the entirety of y3 AFTER tossing her back to the wolves just so he can play house at okinawa.. hes not going to#suddenly realise that he wants to spend the rest of his life with majima hes going to be pondering how miserable he is while beating the#fuck out of people because sorry i didnt actually pay attention to the gaiden stuff is kiryu a hitman now or some sort of mercenary either#way its so hot that hes paralleled by y0 majima because hes so depressed and wants to kill himself and forced to wear a nice suit and do#things he doesnt want to while being kept on a tight leash like hohooho ... have sex with me ...!!!#im going to kill him myself to put him out of his misery if i have to ... just let kiryu run off to america and join the cia im kidding but#wait i just thought of him actually running off and sayama pulling some strings in the force to keep people from looking for him because#shes like a bigshot cop now ... i think she should be able to cradle him gently and keep him like a show cat#a shivering wet penis in the rain and she takes him in and gives him a loving home ... i feel a little embarrassed talking about hetships#but the concept of kiryu just being in her house and living with her is making me laugh like wow ... hes straight now.... like obviously hes#still not going to be like lets get married 🥰 but sayama would want to... i believe that she could forge their documents so kiryu isnt an#illegal immigrant anymore and she gives him an american name so john yakuza can become real ... its like a fake dating au but they really#arent dating theyre just having sex and acting out scenes from a kdrama but eventually kiryu will have to go back because hes so sad#without his kids and he needs to see them one last time to pass away peacefully. sorry i just remembered how much older kiryu was than#sayama like thats a bit funny ... like i still think kiryu should be into older guys or girls but like we cant always have that happen#like how majimas options for getting fucked by creepy old guys are getting lesser year by year because those old geezers keep dying and hes#old now too ... like theyre so old thats fucked. i know ive been saying how kzmj can never win but i do think majima should breastfeed kiryu
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cantofworms · 1 year
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#ok ik all the hot take asks are pre much done and the sparkly say smth nice asks are better but well I’ve been having thoughts all day at#work and want to get them out now so that’s what I’m doing lol#obvs for the past few months i think ppl are vv heavily leaning into the dnf /r and I firmly believe that they aren’t#like yes I enjoy being a multi shipper but I still primarily read dnf fics bc they’re cute dnf writers and artists MWAHH ilysm#but it’s been increasingly annoying how every move dnf make ppl hyper obsess over it and ignore everything else like blog what u want this#is tumblr dot com but I think ppl how only see dnf thro the lens of romantic do much more ‘harm’ than ppl who dont#like the argument about taking validation out of their very REAL amazing friendship just gets over shadowed by omg Dream posted a pic of#geogre they’re in LOVE and sucking and FUCKING every night. like#and then completely disregard when dnf do and say the exact same shit about all their other friends#like dream has explicitly said they aren’t dating (ignore that tho) amd that’s he’s kissed multiple ppl since coming out (ignore that too)#and their friends naturally say that they’re all single (ignore that too) idk man it’s ok they like to pander amd that dream is a toxic#dnfer but it’s all just For Funsies. another thing is ppl CONSTANTLYYYY putting geohres sexuality under a microscope oh he drinks lemonade#from Starbucks he’s soooo gay like dumb shit like that is so irritating#the fact that geogre has never once talked about his sexuality except that one instance where he got a DONO about it proves how much it#just doesn’t matter or apply to the type of content creator he is/wants to be#to be clear if he is or isn’t or dnf every explicitly announce their romantic relationship im gonna be sooooo happy and supportive like aw#dnfogies🫶🏻 but I think there’s a 99.9% chanve that’ll never happen so maybe we should all just care a Little Less and focus on out lgbt#creators if that’s smth u wanna watch/blog about idk maybe I’m just burnt out from the phandom but whyyyyy does is matter what their#sexualities are they play minecraft who cares who CARESSSS idk maybe just having older brothers around dtqk ages has made me realize that#guys will just act homiesexual no matter What#guys are just Like That and tbc I’m not saying that just bc gnf hasn’t made an official coming out doesn’t mean he’s not queer but for the#sake of his contwnt it doesn’t matter either way ? so why are ppl talking about it on the daily idk man it’s just annoying but Oh Well#at the end of the day they’re all famous white guys and nothing matters hurray !!
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hecksupremechips · 5 months
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The most validating thing about having a brother in law is sometimes I’ll make a comment about my parents being kinda horrible and he’ll just be like "DUDE FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT IVE BEEN THINKING THIS THE WHOLE TIME BUT DIDNT KNOW HOW TO ADDRESS IT"
#the klock keeps ticking#like i remember about 2 years ago when it really clicked with me that my parents were worse than i let myself believe#i had like covid and so to be safe i completely isolated myself in my room and only came out when no one was around#or with a mask on just to get food or use the bathroom that was it#and like when i had mostly recovered i stopped isolating and i looked around and noticed huh the house is kinda a hot mess#and i realized it was because i was the one who kept up with like basic cleaning and making sure things were in order#so like a little bit later i was in the car with my sister and brother in law and i was talking about this#and i was like ‘i think ive realized our parents are kinda unable to take care of themselves without me doing it for them’#and my BIL was like IM SO GLAD YOU FINALLY NOTICED THIS HAS BEEN DRIVING ME CRAZY FOR YEARS#which was just so validating i was like okay so im not just being an ass like this is an actual problem#and idk a more recent thing that maybe uh. made me a little bit emotional was we were basically at a cool place where you can climb shit#and he was just kinda there helping me when it seemed i was gonna lose balance to make sure i didnt get hurt#as well as my sister too and i was like oh god is this was like. basic affection feels like???#is this what it feels like to have someone care like actually kinda give a fuck about your safety and well being???#so yeah i maybe am still not okay with that and still dont know how to feel anymore 😭#so i guess even though hes stinky and i like to bully him I GUESS hes actually a pretty cool guy and he does make my sister happy and he#treats her with respect and hes very good with their cat so yeah maybe i actually really appreciate him and care more about him#than i do my parents and most people in my family#but i cant say that cuz then itll like. go straight to his head 🥺#and he still wont play pokepark 2 with me even though he PROMISED its been like 4 years since he said that and WE STILL HAVENT PLAYED IT 👺👺👺
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cloudwisp · 2 months
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✮ sylus x wife!reader
contents: fluff, suggestive. arranged marriage au. hints of slow burn. you like playing hard to get and he loves calling you his wife. 1.4k wc.
꒰ note ᰔ I had to deposit my messy thoughts somewhere and this headcanon post was the result.
part two here. ꒱
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⭒ Arranged marriage with Sylus where he prefers to call it a “strategic partnership” as a means of appearances to flaunt that he has it all—an empire, riches, strength, influence and now a darling wife who waits for him at home. You’re not so much as a random choice, Sylus had been watching you from afar for a while and in exchange for his protection in the N109 zone he strikes a deal with you to play a simple role. You have every reason to be wary of him and know to keep your wits about yourself, but even you acknowledge that your chances are better with him. Though, if you asked him how he was so certain you’d agree to his proposal he’d admit that he wasn’t but he knew you’d consider it if he had an advantage over you.
⭒ He sets his terms and conditions—you reside in his humble abode, wedding ring always worn on your finger, and attend events with him as a pretty accessory on his arm to contribute to his image. But he’ll never admit that he actually enjoys your company at business functions that often feel dull to him. You are more than welcome to spend your days as you please so long you don’t cause him trouble, and that also means you have his black card privileges to spoil yourself rotten. Of course, he accommodates most requests you may have like sleeping in separate rooms if that’s what you wish (and redecorating because his furnishing decisions are quite bleak).
⭒ Luke and Kieran can sense that their boss feels something for you despite his nonchalance toward this little arrangement. It starts off small, it always does—Sylus takes note of your morning and night routine, your picky eating habits and has the chef make adjustments to your preference, how he sees you out in the gardens and come back with spring tulips to brighten the space and the next week he already replaced the slowly withering flowers with fresh ones. The twins whisper among themselves that he’s often less annoyed and irritated when you’re around, and their boss wouldn’t go through the trouble of being considerate unless he cares for you. It’s almost exciting for them both to witness a budding romance unfold before their very eyes and they do offer a helping hand here and there to keep things interesting.
⭒ Sylus thinks it’s adorable how you keep trying to resist him and that’s precisely the reason he loves seeking you out just to watch your resolve crumble under his touch. He finds you in the kitchen preparing a snack and cages you from behind with his hands planted on either side of you against the counter. “Hey kitten, I thought I’d find you in here.” You feel his hot breath down your neck as he pushes your hair aside just enough to lay a soft kiss on your shoulder. He chuckles when you comment that he’s being awfully touchy with you, and he purposely moves closer so that his chest is pressing against your back. “Perhaps I just can’t keep my hands to myself where you’re involved. Besides, you’re my wife now. I think I have the right to touch you whenever I like.”
⭒ You remind him that you’re his wife in title only, but that doesn’t discourage his flirtation and teasing as he allows you to nudge past him. He follows you into the common area and takes a seat on the couch, spreading his legs wide and taking up a lot of space. His gaze is settled on you as he pats his thigh and his lips curl into a smirk. “Come here, wife.” You naturally scoff meanwhile you place the plate of seasonal fruits on the side table and situate yourself closest to the armrest, taking a bite into a juicy red strawberry as you ignore his piercing stare.
⭒ For someone who always gets what he wants, Sylus isn’t used to being defied like this. And had it been anyone else his patience would wear dangerously thin, but he supposes that you’re a special exception because he seems to enjoy the chase and claiming its reward. With one small gesture, he drags you across the couch by a gravitational pull and you squeal when the swirling red easily turn and maneuver you so you’re forced to straddle him and your hands prop on his shoulders for support. “There, much better. Comfy? This is the best seat in the house.” His gaze locks with yours, and he thinks you huffing and frowning at him is simply cute. He firmly grabs your wrist with the bitten strawberry in your hand and lifts it to his mouth for a sweet taste.
⭒ “No fair… using your Evol against me like this.” You grumble under your breath as you gently trail your thumb from his chin to the corner of his mouth where the strawberry juices began to spill. Then an impulsive thought takes over and you pinch his cheek between your fingers, creating a sticky mess on his face. “I hope you’re enjoying yourself. That’s for treating me like a sack of potatoes.” He chuckles once more, his hand falling on your hip and he gives you a light squeeze. “Oh, I do have every intention of fully enjoying my wife tonight.” And by that, he means taking you out for a joyride on his motorbike and feeling your arms wrapped around him tightly as the engine roars through the streets under the night sky and sinking moon. Sylus would never engage in any intimate acts you weren’t ready for, but he loves seeing you fluster at his suggestive remarks.
⭒ As the weeks cross over into months, you never imagined that you’d be spending so much time with Sylus outside of your agreed terms. He’s everywhere in every waking moment of your life even when he’s not there physically. You’re learning new things about him each day and you (begrudgingly) like being around him—even when he can sometimes be a playful bully toward you. When he’s gone for long stretches of time to deal with negotiations and other important matters in the N109 zone, you can feel your heart yearning for him but you’d never say that you miss him out loud when you think he's still toying with you. But with the way he cares for you like you’re both in a real and genuine relationship, it’s hard to know his true intentions and keep your feelings buried deep inside your chest for long.
⭒ You accidentally confirm that Sylus does harbor romantic feelings for you when you carelessly bring up your replacement in a lighthearted joke. You’ve never seen his face falter so quickly at your words as he averts his gaze for a moment to collect himself—a hint of vulnerability in his crimson hues. “I wouldn’t have found a new wife.” He shakes his head and tells you, his voice a little rougher than before. You don’t know what to say, but you manage a soft “No?” that reaches his ears. “No. I wouldn’t have been able to replace you, kitten. You’re it for me. The only one. No one could fill the void you’d leave behind.”
⭒ You and Sylus have kissed before, but this is the first time you’re initiating it. As you brush your lips against his, there’s a softness you never noticed. His hand slips around the small of your back and he pulls you close against him, returning your kiss with the same tenderness as though savoring the taste of you. You lean back after a moment, your palm meeting his cheek in a sweet embrace. “You know, I'm still getting used to the idea that I’ve fallen for you.” You can see him returning back to normal when he offers you a cocky smirk. “And yet here you are. In my arms, with your lips on mine. I think you’re not being entirely honest, my beautiful wife.” Sylus has waited a long time to hear those words from you but you don’t need to know that right now.
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hanasnx · 2 months
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“ I WAS MADE FOR LOVIN’ YOU ” — logan howlett.
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MINORS DNI 18+ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ WARNINGS: fem reader ノ age gap ノ established relationship ノ size difference ノ suggestive content ノ sexual content: naughty daydreams about pussy eating, nipple play, and groping; masturbation; voyeurism.
“I’m gonna take care of you.” Those six words—six—have defined your relationship with your husband, LOGAN HOWLETT. There’s a great protector in him, this compulsion to mentor and house within him that stretches far beyond his own needs. You fall within that range, and as soon as you met him you latched onto him. It didn’t take long at all before your imprint was reciprocated. Now he thinks of you first in everything he does.
He may not always look it, but you’re a factor in all his decisions. Settling down, nabbing a good job—one that didn’t ask for his background—was all to put you up in a house in the mountains. Far away from civilization, an ivory tower made up of wood he cut himself, surrounded by acres of nature. He’s always thought of himself a hair on the wild side, somehow you tame that down. It’s good, he tells himself, you and him.
It’s a partnership, and all he wants out of you is your safety. He likes you where he can keep an eye on you, make sure you stay out of trouble, make sure you’re comfortable.
You wish you could explain just why he thinks he has to protect you, why he married you, why he pays all the bills and expects nothing in return. You wish you could explain just why this relationship comprises all facets of a real marriage except for intimacy.
Logan won’t touch you. You’ll eat off each other’s utensils, fall asleep on his chest on the couch watching a movie—hell, he’ll reluctantly incline in your direction with a roll of his eyes to let you peck his cheek good-bye when he leaves for work. Yet, he won’t even kiss you. Even before he married you, there wasn’t so much as a grope or a stray look.
There’s home in Logan. You live to please him. You’ll cook him whatever he wants, keep the house he built for you clean as a whistle, you’ll spend all your free time with him, grab him his nightly beer and light his cigar so he stays content—but you’ve never even seen him naked. You doubt you ever will. Regardless, you stay, you can’t imagine leaving this life, leaving him.
It’s defied your expectations the fairy-tales of your childhood gave you. Your knight in shining armor rescued you, yet refuses to plant even true love’s kiss. When you’d matured, you’d fantasized about an insatiable husband that found you so irresistible he couldn’t keep his hands off you. Logan’s never looked at you that way, even though he calls you his wife without hesitation, married you without a second thought.
“Is it because I’m younger than you? I’m only in my early twenties. That’s not a big deal!” you’ve reasoned with him, but he still treats you like you’re naive. He must want passion, you’re sure of that. Why else are you young and beautiful if not to take advantage of it while you still can? Just once you’d like to see him yearn for you, to show lack of restraint, to come home one day so hungry for you that you don’t make it out of the kitchen.
Those claws… those deadly metal claws… you wish he’d use them in fantastical and deviant ways. Just one would glide through your nighty like sheet paper, bareing you to your husband—a sight for him only. You lie awake next to him at night, envisioning raunchy dreams of him proudly boasting the size difference between you two, demonstrating his sheer raw strength by overpowering you and taking what he wants from you. You’ve run your fingers delicately over his lips and the rough pad of his shaved chin, but you can’t imagine just how good it’d feel against your tit, swirling his hot tongue around your perked nipple while his callused digits pinch the other. You can pretend his head is ducking between your thighs, the sensation of his soft hair tickling your skin and tangling in your fingers as his masculine jaw scratches the fragile tissue of your pussy. As starved as you are, even discomfort like that is enough to make you moan into your palm, only to check over your shoulder to make sure you still hear your husband’s snoring.
You steel yourself at the noise, the low rumbling of his sleep cautions you to stay quiet but to proceed nonetheless. Your hand creeps down your neck, your chest, your stomach… You really should leave the room, but you’d risk waking him up for real at the sound of the door. Instead, you fuck yourself yet again, the soft rocking of the mattress as you hump your own hand filling the ears of your kindhearted husband—who’s been awake this whole time.
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