#i think i need to start consulting lesbians

[elysiality]

࿐ྀུ 𖠑 JOBS I THINK THE YELLOWJACKETS WOULD HAVE IN A NO-CRASH AU (because I'm bored as hell)

JACKIE TAYLOR — professional soccer player. not because she's good at it or anything— she just wants to. realistically, she would've probably been Jeff's wife but I choose to believe that she went to Rutgers, had her lesbian awakening when she realised how much she missed Shauna and then pursued a professional career in soccer. or she starts up a chain of general convenience stores or smth. also think she has tattoo artist potential but you guys aren't ready for that conversation yet.

SHAUNA SHIPMAN — publishing house owner or a writer for children's books/YA thrillers. I think it's safe to assume that with proper medical care and assistance and y'know, food, Shauna would've delivered her baby and been a much happier person overall. she goes to brown and majors in media studies or something and then completes her education to start writing her own books. her and that damn journal are inseperable, so why not start a career in it? (I also choose to believe her and Jackie would atleast date if not get married— or she starts dating Lottie ayy-) could also see police agent as a career for her.

LOTTIE MATTHEWS — again, realistically, she would probably have been groomed to take over her father's business. it's either that, or she goes to uni and studies business/luxury branding and management and then ends up working for a luxury brand consultant/model OR she detours completely from the posh life and starts over from scratch by pursuing sports as her career (which would probably get her cut off but hey, atleast she and Jackie are together !) or what the hell, she starts a cult.

NATALIE SCATORCCIO — indie rock band guitarist or child service worker. no in-between. she would've either wanted to choose a fun career that she enjoyed doing or, knowing how empathetic she is, would've wanted to work and ensure that other children didn't have to go through what she did. she takes her job very seriously.

LAURA LEE — she starts a queer youth camp for Christians or becomes a pre-school teacher (presumably in a catholic but accepting school). she's so devoted to her faith, I can't even imagine she'd do anything else. she also has the vocation to become a pediatric nurse, actually.

VAN PALMER — either runs a video rental store like she does in the actual timeline, but finishes college with a business degree first to help actually develop her brand further or she works as a professional wedding photographer for queer people. yeah. also has grease monkey potential.

TAISSA TURNER — still think she would become a lawyer, and maybe pursue state senator? she'd probably leave Wiskayok so there's that. I think she would've been much happier to be a lawyer in a no-crash au, especially since I assume that she and Van get married when it's legalised and go everywhere together (which is one of the reasons why Van became a wedding photographer!!) (TAI TURNER FOR PRESIDENT ??)

MISTY QUIGLEY — pediatrician, ob gyn or something in astrophysics. while I do think Misty more or less chose the correct career for herself in terms of field, I feel like she doesn't really have the vocation for nurse?? like she was terrible to all those old people?? but she's definitely smart enough to get into science.

TRAVIS MARTINEZ — he works on a farm or he's a firefighter. next. also has street artist/tattoo artist potential.

AKILAH — beekeeper, horticulturist or marine biologist. need I explain? she's so nature-aligned that again, I can't see her doing anything else...

MARI IBARRA — nutritionist or dietician. she's the dumb girl who's surprisingly good at numbers when it comes to food. I genuinely don't think she likes being the chef, it was just a necessity so she did it :/

MELISSA HAT — I don't know. genuinely. professional hat-wearer. model, in layman terms.

GEN — neurologist or cardiologist.

COACH SCOTT — he quits, the girls throw a big party for him, and he moves in with Paul, running a sports equipment store :)

[generic-enthusiast]

so i've had this idea for a modern dance au for a while and i need to share it

so soda's dating sandy and they're having Issues. basically sandy was just looking for something casual and soda cannot do casual so now he's super invested and trying to make a long-lasting relationship with someone who doesn't want one, but she also doesn't tell him she doesn't want one because she doesn't have much stability in her life, and it is nice to have someone to depend on and if she broke up with him she'd kinda be completely alone (she has evie but they're not that close).

so. no good guys, no bad guys, just a situation.

anyways, in an effort to salvage the relationship, soda signs up to sandy's dance class. (she takes an urban style that is yet to be decided). without consulting her. to him it's a big romantic gesture, and to her it's him invading what little was left of her life without him.

heh.

so when he gets there, he doesn't understand why sandy's so mad at him and they start getting into bigger and bigger fights.

but he keeps on going because... he thinks it'll change something.

anyways he meets sandy's dance class.

first we have her dance friends: evie. and steve's also there but he doesn't really like anyone but evie (sandy thinks they're dating and accidentally gives soda erroneous information. evie is an aroace lesbian queen and steve is gay. but i digress).

then there's like the popular kids? idk if anyone else has taken dance class but there's always that group of usually girls who've been going there their whole life and have super close connections to each other and are super extroverted and sometimes they'll adopt someone who's new to the class. those are the socs lmao. cherry's like that One Girl who's their leader and the best dancer in the class and you always kinda wanna hate her but also she's just genuinely a good person and you know the only reason you hate her is jealousy.

idk maybe that's just me.

sandy, evie, and steve are me in my contemporary dance class, off to the side and alone during the breaks.

and then soda joins.

and steve hates him.

because soda doesn't take the actual dancing seriously, he's just there for his relationship. he has no past in dance, and has no idea what he's doing. he just follows what people do and isn't coordinated and trips over his own feet and forgets all the choreography and steve wants this to come out well g-ddammit.

anyways they end up bonding and dating eventually and please please please send me asks about this i need to talk about it

[for-a-longlongtime]

soooo so much goodness to ask about but I saw trans!lucien and !!! Pls tell me about that one??

Gideon!! 💜 Ahhh, I've written very little on this so far, but he's been living in my head for quite a while now - I just need to find the right timing to actually sit down and really tie this all together (I think I initially wanted to write it for Pride last year, but I wanted to wait and see the actual movie first). This one is already special to me, so I really want to treat it with a lot of care.

My first impression of Lucien was 'omg Dieter vibes' and then I was like, no, wait-- the shirt, the necklaces, some other things... this is giving me some hot transmasc energy ideas for a fic.

He shows up at married reader's house in a similar way as he does at Rose's house in the movie -- I'm leaning towards a lesbian or bisexual f-reader insert for this one probably (haven't decided yet). They were together before Lucien transitioned, and this meeting at reader's house is the first time they really see and talk to each other again in quite some years. He also sneaks off with her to the yard and kisses her the way he does in the movie (because asdfghjkl), but differently than in the movie it's reader who broke up with Lucien way back -- it just didn't work out well between them at the time.

Lucien had spoken to reader about transitioning while they were still together, and eventually he ends up starting that process about half a year after they separate. She's always felt guilty because she wants him to know that that didn't have anything to do with why she broke up with him, and in hindsight she wishes that she could've been there for him during that time as a friend to support him. But it had been really hard for her to break up with him in the first place (I think they both may consider each other a bit as 'the one who got away'), so the reason she kept her distance was because she knew she couldn't stay close/remain present in his life while she was trying to get over Lucien.

She's married now (her spouse is wealthy as in the movie, I'm not sure yet if they have a kid), and while it's not necessarily an unhappy marriage -- seeing Lucien brings up a lot of old feelings for her, hence why she takes off with him and a bottle of booze to the backyard. I think it'll actually get a lot more smutty than it did in the movie, but I'm still considering all kinds of options for that (incl a packer possibly, but if I do that I want to make sure I do it right and by consulting people who use/have used one). Either way, it's going to be a one shot - and as you can tell probably, I'm really excited about it. 💜

Thank you for asking about this WIP!!

If anyone else wants to know about my WIP list which is way too long tb, feel free to send me an ask!

[thewickedbohemian]

Thoughts on my new favorite High Potential and one that clearly showed why it just got renewed (or at least what about it makes it worth renewing)

because nothing creepy ever happens at the park in crime shows

case in point

and now it's High Potential doing the double musical theater guest star thing like it thinks it's Elsbeth (Jai Rodriguez from Zanna, Don't and Rory O'Malley from The Book Of Mormon)

wanna bet the creepy guy isn't the actual culprit

the look on Daphne's face when Morgan tries fashion-based profiling

again this show pops off with the casual representation

"I wouldn't have yelled at her had I known" that she was being murdered, dude

so what are they hiding

was that meant to be an oblique reference to the dancers from E2

again, the clearly-set-up slowburn couple in Booth's diner booth, this is gonna be a thing

I hope they paid for their meal

Never tell the consultant to stay put

what'd I tell you

there's the (first) twist, creep's a PI

again, foreshadowing, wonder why marriage partner and not work partner was what he jumped to

oh, that's a potential motive

so one dad did that not the other

seems justifiably concerned, but why does he sound like a helicopter parent

hmm...what's her grudge

Morgan finds any excuse to do her thing

holy nannycams batman

digging his jacket

Earth to Ava, hello

chekhov's awooga?

okay PI is really starting to creep me out

what does Morgan notice?

nice gender role subversion

so another wannabe detective or just prepared?

why immigration law

looks like some parallel badass mom-ing might be needed

Little Sketchy found

Jessica Fletcher epiphany and are we really doing the cliche triangle plot

Little Sketchy little creepy

can any evidence confirm your alibi

wow that implicitly-Mario-Kart audio is fucking loud

wow, just, wow Morgan

feeling similar vibes to what Ava went through a few episodes ago

shot framed like Soto's the world's most unhelpful therapist

let's play dodge the PI

enter the squint potentially confirming what we already know

ooh digging Morgan's coat

again parallel exclusion

not surprised Morgan's a Brandi Carlile fan

Daphne Garcias up the big twist, whole lotta fake profiles, I wonder if that's why Morgan was denied from the group

Morgan figures it all out and I love the imagery

That's what Morgan saw

I was starting to be worried she wouldn't give us an infodump and now we get a whole bunch back to back that basically blow open the whole case via Morgan Librarians-ing out (also either I missed something, that was oddlyspecific, or Morgan's Greek (or at least her heritage is) and if it's that last one that's kinda cool again with the casual representation)

don't take the indoor cats out and also why does it look like Morgan's wearing a lesbian flag sweater

aww but why'd she only show one picture

who calls a merry-go-round a spinner but it's cute that it got the kids having fun together

what was that song at the end, it sounded pretty and I don't trust Tunefind after I used it to look up a song from I think it was episode 5 and I couldn't find any evidence of a song with the title Tunefind said the song used had on the website of the band Tunefind said the song was by

[literary-illuminati]

Book Review 43 - Even Though I Knew The End by C. L. Polk

Oh this was fun. Never would have heard of it if it hadn’t been nominated for a Hugo, and devoured it in the course of a computer-less Sunday afternoon. It wasn’t exactly reaching for the stars, but it knew what it was about and it executed it well; there’s a real virtue to that. Also I adore slightly cheesy but self-serious noir and the early 20th century really is the ideal setting for classical urban fantasy.

The story follows Helen, a private investigator and warlock in 1930s Chicago. Ten years prior to the story, she sold her soul to a demon to resurrect her younger brother from a car crash that would have otherwise killed her entire family – for her trouble, she was cast out from the magical brotherhood training her as a mystic and forced to make a living as a cut-rate diviner and gumshoe in Chicago. The plot kicks off three days before the deal comes due and her soul’s forfeit, and she takes one last consulting job to add a bit more to the nest egg she’ll be leaving for her girlfriend Edith when she’s torn from the mortal coil. And then, of course, she finds out that a) her employer is a demon, b) the case she’s consulting on is someone ritually murdering other poor souls who’ve made deals, days before they come due, and c) if she solves it she’ll get her soul back, along with enough money to make to San Francisco with Edith and start a new life free and clear.

So this is not a book that sets out to surprise the reader. The storytelling is efficient and the foreshadowing is reasonably honest – you can guess just about every twist well ahead of time with even the slightest bit of effort. I’d say the book isn’t trying to break any new ground, but actually it’s the only example I can think off hand of this sort of genre emulation period piece that both has a queer protagonist and doesn’t either elide or edit out the homophobia of the their environment, so there is that. Anyway, ‘genre emulation’ is the right term I think – snappy, tightly written noir plot that doesn’t outlast its welcome (this was absolutely a novella-sized story).

I really don’t know the author or their work well enough to know how intentional it is, but the ending very much felt like a comment on the whole Bury Your Gays/Tragic Lesbian trope. Essentially, Edith gets herself heroically sacrificed saving Helen’s life in the climactic showdown. Then, once the dust has settled and Marlow (her demonic client) has given Helen her soul back she…immediately sells it again to bring her back. Better ten years of Californian bliss with her true love then an eternity in heaven (and besides, that brother she’d saved the first time had just killed an angel, so someone’s going to need to keep him company in hell). The book’s title is in no way subtle or metaphorical, it is a line of the protagonist’s internal monologue.

The story’s universe is a folk-Christian one, and it is absolutely imperative that when reading it you don’t poke at the underlying metaphysics at all. Angels and demons are real and magicians are the distant descendants of Nephilim and some of the Grigori still haunt the earth, and we have it on good authority that God doesn’t actually care about being gay and everyone seems very frightened of the idea of summoning the Archangel Michael to earth, but start asking any followup questions about angels and world events during the Roosevelt Administration and you’re ruin the story for yourself. Just don’t worry about it.

As a final note, I really did love Marlowe – or properly, she’s one of my favorite types of demons in these sorts of stories. Epitome of high class beauty, lives in a palatial penthouse waited upon handed and foot by layers of servants, eats the best food and wears the best clothes and has the best lovers, even a generous employer and creditor as long as you do what she wants and give her what she’s owed. The sort of demon who seems like falling out of heaven was worth it, and one you can imagine actually convincing someone to sell their soul. She’s fun!

[saywhatjessie]

And he loved me so naughty

Advent Calendar Day 2! (prompts by @raven-cincaide-words) Today's prompts: Ugly Sweater | Friend of a Friend | Mulled Wine  Fandom: House MD - Pairing: Hilson .6k[Ao3]

Wilson felt the double tap of House’s cane against his shoe but ignored it. If it was important, House would interrupt.

Well, even if it wasn’t important, House would interrupt. So there wasn’t a reason for Wilson to do House’s work of being rude for him.

Sure enough. “Need a consult,” House said before turning to the woman Wlson was talking to. “Don’t let his ugly sweater and sympathetic face fool you: this man is a Jewish slut. But don’t worry– I’m sure there are other good Christian boys you can bring home for the holidays.”

Wilson smiled apologetically at her before turning to House. “You don’t have a patient.”

“I just got a patient.”

“And is the patient that jug of mulled wine you have behind your back?” he asked. “Because I have heard those are at higher risk of hepatocellular carcinoma. I could probably do a biopsy with a corkscrew if you have one.”

House smirked, bringing the jug in front of him and holding it up like he was surprised. “Oh, would you look at that! Now come drink her with me.”

Wilson raised an eyebrow at him. “Wine? And we’re needle dropping some Joni MItchell, I’m assuming?”

House winked. “Best way to get wine drunk.”

“Fast Car by Tracy Chapman,” the woman cut in. “That’s a better wine drinking song.”

House raised his eyebrow at her. “With this potion and that chanting, I’m not sure I wouldn’t emerge from that ritual as a lesbian.”

“From that whole exchange, I kind of assumed you already were one.”

Wilson dropped his head, burying his smile in his hot chocolate. “House, this is Harper. She’s a friend of Thirteen’s.”

House turned his body to face her fully now, his hand flexing on his cane.

“What kind of friend? Rock, paper, or scissors?”

“Well I can guess what the scissors stands for–”

“I’ll bet you can.”

She snorted. “Not that one. Is rock partying and paper is work?”

House grinned. “So Thirteen talks about me outside of work. Cool.”

Wilson screwed his face up. “That’s a leap.”

“No other way she’d parse the metaphor that fast.”

“Or she’s used to talking to Thirteen who thinks eerily like you.”

“Jeeze, Wilson, no need to be mean,” Thirteen said, coming up behind House. She snagged the wine from him. “I heard the call of Joni Mitchell. We getting out of here?”

“Since you’re stealing my stolen wine, I can only assume that Wilson and I are invited?”

Wilson made eye contact with Thirteen, shrugging a little like ‘Let him have this.’

She rolled her eyes. “You’re not gonna convince us to make out so you can watch,” she told House.

He grinned. “Wanna bet?”

She laughed. “Sure. Hundred bucks.”

“House, I’m not paying that when you lose,” Wilson jumped in.

“Why would I lose?”

“Why would you lose a bet that entirely depends on Thirteen deciding not to do something she was already planning on not doing?”

“She’s only planning on not doing it right now,” House told him. “But wait until they get to see us make out.”

Thirteen barked a laugh and Wilson felt his face getting hot.

Even still, he grabbed the bottle of wine and started heading toward the elevators. “Then what are we waiting for?”

Thirteen and her friend did not end up making out in front of them, but Wilson waking up in House’s bed the next morning couldn’t find it in himself to mind.

He still wasn’t giving House the hundred bucks.

[sol-y-yam]

just got a goop for myself, do you have any goop tips for new goopers? i don't know what kind of goop this is, it's like really goopy... features are very amorphous... i think it likes me though so thats good

Assuming you just got yourself a new amorphous, goopy pokemon, and this is not an elaborate innuendo for drugs, that's great! Most gooply pokemon I can rhink of are actually surprisingly endearing!

I can't give you many tips, but I can say that, from my studies and experiences, I've learnt that most gopy Pokemon should be given moisture regularly (except for a few specific species lines, one of which being the Meltan line).

Alot of these slippery glorpies are water based organisms, and moisture is essential to their survival and growth! It's for that same reason that Rain is so good for Sliggoo evolving into Goodra. Normally that evolution could take up to years without rain, but that significant increase in moisture accelerates the cellular change and growth at such an exponential level that it causes the evolution to occur near instantaneously! It's cool!

So I'd say, depending on the species, you may wanna carry around a little spray bottle of water, to gently mist your pokemon, particularly in hotter weather. Some can draw moisture from the ground and plants, like Goomy and Sliggoo can, but others need it more directly.

The Solosis line needs to be hydrated, so as to keep their gel outer layer strong! That outer layer is partly water based, and hydration is key to their survival! They can go a while without water, partly because they're able to reserve so much, but that Gel layer will start to dry out after a week and a half or so, and it'll completely dry out after about 3 weeks, and they can't live without that Gel layer! So hydrate your Solosis like once every other day, I'd say (that's off of memory of my own time spent studying this, so consult a Pokemon Nurse before taking what I say as fact)

The Muk line is interesting, as most fluids (including poisons and chemicals that would otherwise be dangerous to humans and Pokemon) can be added to its body with very little side effects. Everything from Water to Salt Water to Pool Chlorine to Bleach can be added. Liquids made from foods, so juices and soups and the like, can also be added, but they can alter its colors! Muk are very resilient Pokemon, so honestly I'd pour out any old soup and waste into its mouth. Saves on food waste AND keeps them fed! -

Anywho, good luck with your new glorby! The best advice I can give you is to love it with all your heart, and definitely consult professionals when it comes to advice! Not a 17 year old lesbian .! I may be studying Pokemon Conservation (or atleast I used to be until The Crimes™️), but I'm no Professor!

[fenmere]

hi i would like to ask more about your dragon-wanting non-heroine story because your tiny pitch in the tags sounds fantastic and I want to know more about her and what she does thank you for your time

Oh, of course!

Thank you for asking.

So, this WIP is probably not half done. It looks like it's going to be about trilogy length (170,000 or so words), though we aren't sure.

It's titled The Lost Transition of Anne Ellipsis.

Anne starts the story as a closeted trans woman who is right on the verge of coming out due to desperation in 2013, but holding back because Medicaid in that year doesn't cover what she needs. And, she hasn't found the name Anne yet, and starts going by her first initial when she does come out to her coworker and closest thing to a friend, Julia.

The story begins two weeks after her grandmother's death, when she receives her inheritance in the form of a box of knickknacks and a "wooden" sword. It's the toy sword she used to play with as a kid whenever she visited her grandmother.

That night, she has a dream in which she's a draconic person talking to another draconic person on an alien world about the power of the sword.

Since she was little, she daydreamt a lot about being various different animals, especially her favorite dinosaurs, but she'd never really considered dragons before. So, it comes as a bit of a surprise to her that she starts feeling dysphoric over having a human body, and that leaning into her sudden bouts of phantom limbs helps sooth even her gender/sex related physical dysphoria. And that it's specifically being a dragon that helps her focus.

But it takes her a little while to take that seriously, because she's distracted by trying to do things reasonably and safely while using the power of the sword, as she learns that it is very magical and ridiculously powerful, and can be used to help her transition.

She is not as reasonable and careful as she'd hope she was being.

There are, of course, major consequences of anything significant she does with the blade.

And then, once she gets in too deep, she finds herself digging even deeper, because her initial attempts at transition weren't good enough.

Does this make her a villainess? In the eyes of some, it might. But how else is she to rid herself of her dysphoria?

Other aspects of Anne's character:

She's a 36 year old trans lesbian working as a barista for the Oarfish Cafe, and living in a studio apartment a block and a half away from work. She's an only child and thinks she has ADHD, but it's more than that.

She got a degree in English after six years of college, but has used it only to write a handful of trans fiction found in a couple trans archives and forums. Not many people have read any of it.

Her otherworld counterpart is a Ktleteccete*, an alien species of autistic-like psychic amphibians who resemble something humans would call dragons, who each have an Art (a spiritual special interest). But her counterpart hasn't been able to discover her Art despite being at the end of her adolescence (36-ish years old) and is consulting an Elder named The Storyteller about how to find it.

Anne and her counterpart share a soul across their narratives, being the same person, but with different memories, histories, and worlds. And the sword exists in both. When they both possess the sword, they become psychically linked and can visit each other through dreams or meditation.

The sword exists in all universes/narratives**. And the more Annes that wield the sword across the narratives, the more power she has.

But there is a sibling sword, and it is wielded by someone else. --- *These are the same Ktletaccete/Artists that are found in our other stories, but appearing in a slightly different way in this one.

**These universes/narratives are the books and series we've written or have yet to write. Think of it as kind of like that one Warner Brothers cartoon that takes place in a library at night, where all the characters come out of their books and interact with each other. But different.

--- Note: We would LOVE beta readers and editors for this! So, if you or anyone is up for that, please let us know.

[oingomyboingos]

i’m so frustrated on past me’s behalf. stop me if you’ve heard this one before.

i’m in high school coming out as bi. every time i walk to class strangers ask me if i’m a lesbo because they saw me and my partner holding hands. gay friends start making useless lesbian jokes about me. I don’t have the heart to correct them because for once they’re seeing something about me as funny and they at least don’t call me slurs. I am called a lesbian by other bi women because “you don’t date men.” I don’t really date much of anyone after my ex. i’m confused

i’m in undergrad coming out to relatives and getting told by family that “it’s all a phase.” even my aunt who is bi tells me, well-meaningly, that “you don’t know who’s out there, could be lots of guys for you.” I cannot describe why the idea of being with a man as I am makes a scared animal try to claw its way out of my chest. I start identifying as a lesbian, so as to avoid thinking about it.

I’m in senior year laying on the floor. the ceiling fan blades spin overhead. unrelated, I am going to vomit. related, I am a boy. sometimes. and something else indescribable. but I like being a girl? what do I do with my hand sewn skirts and corsets? my head is in a panic but the beast in my chest has finally found some rest.

I am a graduate student stuck living at my parents’ house during lockdown. I feel trapped, but my friends help me think about things other than family troubles. we watch bad dating shows and one friend yells at me for commenting on the bodies of the men. I am not allowed to have comments on men she finds attractive. “you’re a lesbian, no one cares what you think about them anyway.” “lesbian” not “dyke” or “lesbo,” but the word still stings with a familiar smart. it feels more like a cage than a safeguard at this point.

I am living on my own. one of my coworkers who loves playing matchmaker tries to set me up with my other coworker. I cannot get the words “sorry i’m a dyke” to come out of my mouth. somehow, they get stuck between my tonsils. I share that I think i might be bi with a different friend. we get high and her boyfriend tries to use me as their unicorn, without either her or I’s prior consent or conversation. My mental health spirals.

I move in with friends. I am happier than I have ever been. I buy a binder and give myself an asthma attack from how much euphoria I have from being able to run up and down the stairs without bouncing. I wear a vest and trousers. I start a collection of silly hats and sunglasses. I schedule a top surgery consult. I avoid getting insurance approval. that would make it all feel too real. I don’t deserve nice things.

I am still trying to muster up the courage to figure out when I am doing something that brings me joy, and when I am simply on the path of least resistance. by now, I know myself enough that joy has an easier to make out outline. I know the path to it. it’s just getting there that’s the problem. crawling uphill while my own insecurities pile in a mountain beneath my feet.

it is twelve past five in the morning and I am writing this. I don’t know why—but it feels good. my gender and my sexuality feed off each other in odd loops, and i’ve never heard anyone else talk about something like this before. maybe shouting into this void will help find others. maybe it will just give me the space to air it out. I need to email my psychiatrist about my insurance letter. thinking of it makes me anxious. but I will try and sleep now. tackle those mountains tomorrow.

[sunriseverse]

I am legally obligated to ask about lesbian lf/qxm (det. l) and vampire fic <3

okay SO luo fei and qin xiaoman are from a sherlock-esque detective show set in the 30s in shanghai. they fill a holmes-watson dynamic and a lot of people ship them as an ot3 together with the other portion that makes up the holmes-watson trifecta in the show, and like, yes. that is nice. but i want to write about them as lesbians because i think lesbian!holmes/watson is fun. screenshot from a convo i had with my friend that summarises how their vibes are to me in the lesbian au:

anyway basically it started because there's this scene in the show where xiaoman tackles luo fei and knocks the gun out of his hand (he's trying to make a demonstration of how a crime scene would have happened, she thinks he's actually going to shoot someone) and like, as lesbians. that is so so sexy. in my head xiaoman was VERY popular with the ladies back in her hometown and when she gets to shanghai as soon as she and luo fei are paired together she's like a bloodhound with the scent. she knows exactly what she wants and she's going to get it. even if "it" is a slightly pathetic wet consulting detective. luo fei has the misapprehension she could be in control and xiaoman disabuses her of that concept very quickly. she is also very much a pillow princess and xiaoman lovingly rips her to shreds about how prissy and high maintenance she is. unfortunately luo fei is into this. there is no overarching criminal plot as in the show because i don't have the mind space necessary to do Case Fic.

vampire fic is nanqiu (from the show i've been watching recently, zmyx/the spirealm) and the concept is that instead of li dongyuan dying to protect lin qiushi in the third level door, lin qiushi "dies" to the door god...............only, they're something like a vampire, so he's not dead dead. he realises vaguely what's happened and tries to hide it from ruan nanzhu out of worry of how he'll react if he realises lin qiushi is a monster, and because he doesn't feed like he needs to, he and ruan nanzhu wind up together behind a door and lin qiushi starts to lose control. when ruan nanzhu figures it out he offers to let lin qiushi feed off of him. obviously. this fic is a barely-disguised excuse for homoerotic blood drinking.

[qnewsau]

Biconic are ready to shine this Mardi Gras

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/biconic-are-ready-to-shine-this-mardi-gras/

Biconic are ready to shine this Mardi Gras

Bree Mountain is one of Australia’s most passionate advocates for bisexual people and has been running the popular Biconic parties in Sydney for over six years.

In 2025, Biconic will have a float in the Mardi Gras Parade for only the second time, though it will be Bree’s eight float in the parade.

“Biconic works alongside an organisation called Bi+ Visibility and Biconic started as a fundraiser for that organisation,” Bree explains.

“They’ve been in the parade six times but Biconic as its own entity has only been in the parade once before.”

Biconic’s last float won a Mardi Gras Award for its Lady Gaga inspired entry in 2021 and in 2025 they’re bringing the star power again with The Voice season 10’s Penelope Pettigrew agreeing to join the float to perform her 2022 bisexual anthem Biconic, which was itself inspired by the parties.

“Penelope has performed at Fair Day and at the Mardi Gras Party and she is a proud bisexual woman,” Bree says.

“Through our float this year we are really embracing Penelope’s song by saying that as bisexual people we are loud and we’re proud and that we are ‘Free to Be’ bisexual.”

“Penelope will be singing her song live on our float and we’ll also have our dancers and our iconic ten metre long bisexual flag.”

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Bree says there is still more to be done for the bisexual community in NSW, noting a lack of explicit protections under state anti-discrimination laws and that next year will be the 30th anniversary of the 1996 policy by the then organisers of Mardi Gras that saw bisexuals restricted from becoming members.

That policy ended after Mardi Gras went into voluntary administration in 2002 and a new organisation was formed to run the festival and parade under the name “New Mardi Gras.”

Bree understands that the current organisers are not the same organisation that implemented the ban but would still like it to acknowledge that anniversary in some way in 2026.

“Bisexuals can be openly in the parade and are accepted to become members but there is still a lot of stigma against the bisexual community from the wider LGBT+ community and the history that there was a policy that banned bisexual people is something that I think needs to be acknowledged because of the hurt and harm that has been done,” Bree says.

Mardi Gras responds

In a statement to QNews, the organisation acknowledged, “the diverse identities and experiences within our LGBTQIA+ communities.”

“While the membership restrictions in 1996 were enacted under a previous entity, we recognise the impact they had and remain committed to continuing to foster an inclusive and welcoming space for all.

“We look forward to continuing to work together to honour the full diversity of our community with pride and solidarity.”

Bree also feels the name “Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras” still excludes those who are transgender or bisexual or identify as LGBTQIA+ in other ways.

“If Mardi Gras, this year, is advocating that everyone is ‘Free to Be’ then they need a name that represents everyone”, she says.

It’s an issue that the organisation has grappled with over many years.

In 2011 the name of the event was changed to “Sydney Mardi Gras” to be more inclusive and New Mardi Gras changed its name to “Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras” but that led to a community backlash that saw the event name revert to the original.

In 2019 the organisation held another round of community consultations around the naming of the event.

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[drewsaturday]

Old OC art! Her name was Claudia Vogel, I think. She was a Secret Scientist who specialized in language, or at least adjacent to the organization.

This put her in Beeman's sphere quite often to help him translate alien signals. They weren't really friends, but their dynamic was fun to me because he would have to reluctantly ask for her help and she enjoyed getting to power trip about it. She's also one of the few people who still speak to him after the finale. Beeman probably manages on his own fine eventually (the whole "Beeman translated the Drodzian Crop Circle Code" thing), but it makes having to ask her for help even worse the better he does get, lol.

Eventually I think I repurposed her to have an evil mother who planted her in the Secret Scientists to exploit their work, but I'm not sure how I feel about that now. It does make me want Claudia to be too self serving to be properly IN the organization so that when Abbey starts doing mercenary work and robbing tombs, she and Claudia work together sometimes... especiallyyyyy since Claudia is a lesbian and I need Abbey to have a girlfriend.

It is interesting that I made her since Drew speaks 37 surface languages, and again Beeman seems alright with alien language studies, and Abbey being an archaeologist likely gives her SOME background in ancient languages... Drew was probably so excited to mentor her on that honestly, which makes Abbey's betrayal so much worse because she's committing crimes with knowledge Drew helped her learn.

ANYWAY maybe Claudia isn't totally needed, but I think she could be a fun consultant for gaps in knowledge. I guess maybe Claudia had been a contact of Drew's initially from that shared area of study before they got some distance due to having such different associations. It makes me think about her hanging up a call with Drew sometime only to then have Van Rook ring the doorbell with something for Claudia to translate. Maybe she and Drew met through him, or Abbey met her through him? Idk.

I'll give her a better design someday and maybe some more unique interests to keep her relevance.

[nysocboy]

Lucifer Episode 5.15: A hetero-horny Miles Burris, gay and bi erasure, and three butts

Miles Burris' 2023 demo reel shows him in The Righteous Gemstones (as God Squad member Titus), Lucifer, Young Rock, and Teachers, so let's take a look at Lucifer.  He appears three times in 2021, first in Episode 5.15: "Is This How It's Really Going to End?"  Uh-oh, sounds Apocalyptic.

Scene 1: God is retiring, and the angels have to vote for either Lucifer (Tom Ellis, below) or the Archangel Michael (also Tom Ellis) to take His place. Luce's chances are limited by that war-in-heaven thing, but he argues that his years of penance on Earth have changed him, given him the skills necessary to be successful in the job. He needs his siblings, including Jophiel (Miles Burris, top photo), to campaign for him.  

They meet in a night club of some sort -- all we see is the bottom halves of girls' bodies.  Jophiel gazes goofily at the boobs of the invisible girl bringing them drinks.  He is wearing a suit coat with no shirt, so he can flex his pecs to impress girls.

 Lucifer claims that Michael has been doing a Wormtongue-thing on the Big Guy for milennia, making him think he's losing power in order to grab the Throne for himself.  What is this, Succession?  But Jophiel can't decide -- Luce is a lot of fun, but is he a good administrator?  "Michael's  kind of a dick, but he keeps the trains running,"  

Scene 2: Luce offers a female friend or girlfriend a job as consultant, but she doesn't want to move to heaven in the middle of a school year. "Well, hold off until I can convince my siblings to vote for me."  He calls her the future "Mrs. God," so they're romantic partners.

Scene 3: At a bloody crime scene, Dan (Kevin Alejandro, left) wants to fix up the forensic photographer (a lady) with his old cop partner Carol.  Lesbians?  No: 

"A guy with a girl's name?  I'm out!" she says in disgust.  Hey, just because he has a traditionally feminine name doesn't mean he's a fruit, you homophobe!  

"He's a guy, and a good one," Dan continues.  Do you mean "a good guy," as in "nice," or "good at being a guy," as in "not a fruit"?  

I'm a little impatient today, and we've already seen a ton of heterosexism in the first five minutes.  One more homophobic comment, and I'm out.

Why doesn't Dan want her for himself?  Maybe he's gay, and has a boyfriend waiting at ho,e.

Photographer thanks Dan for the thought, but with all the horrible tragedies she has lived through recently, she's not ready to start dating yet. This must be a regular character. 

Lucifer and Girlfriend enter, and hear about the corpse: Jonathan Donnelly, 53, a medical techician, tied up, forced to drink wine for several hours, and then shot.  His phone reveals a nasty argument with a guy named Mo.  So Lucifer's day job is police detective?  I thought he liked crime.

The full review is on Righteous Gemstones Beefcake and Boyfriends

[skooteg]

My male sims vs my female sims… YIKES

[pearlgisa]

badhaai do: how some of us from the queer community missed its point

I've been back after 9213049 years to announce that y'all MUST watch Badhaai Do, it's literally the most beautiful form of queer representation I've seen. another thing, ignore those who say there are zero queer people involved.

a few spoilers ahead, so please watch the movie before reading this :))

1. the script consultant is queer.

2. the people in the pride parade (which had the unfortunate straight flag in the trailer) were queer. I saw plenty of instagram stories by those in there, posting about it, and checked out their profiles. if they didn't spot it, that means not all queer people keep up with news that makes them sad lol.

3. the girl who hands the mask to Shardul was his sister-in-law, also queer.

4. we also don't know for sure whether there aren't any other queer people involved in the making, so let's not just assume that only the hets were a part of this.

and check out the interviews by the crew - they have mentioned more than once that they showed this film to a LOT of queer people, showed the script to a lot of queer people too. the script consultant recently mentioned just how far the writers and directors went to keep it as sincere as possible. that doesn't sound like "rainbow capitalism to me". that doesn't sound like capitalizing off queer suffering.

i, for one, can see some sincere and genuine effort put in by people who are not even gay. we got a pride anthem, some solid gay-lesbian solidarity (#sumiandshardulbesties5ever), realistic queer romance, and several milestones in Indian cinema too, I think (I do not recall a blood test being portrayed as sensual in bollywood before OH MY GOD). i remember tearing up at sumi's father destroying her (and me) with the singular line: "mere ghar me hi kyu?" (why does it have to be at my home AKA why does it have to be my daughter?). i remember the joy of seeing a pride parade and my date bawling like a child watching sumi and rhimjhim run underneath the rainbow. i had to watch it more than once to fully understand the little details and the subtleties of the characters. some of my favourites are:

1. rhimjhim blowing kisses at shardul during the pride (hints at the start of the second half, when shardul blows her kisses)

2. guru giving such a fruity kick to shardul it melts my heart dkjsfji

3. not all members of the family are present in the last scene. taiji and sumi's mother are absent, another unnamed aunt, shardul's nieces, etc. but we see her brother, who was the one who called her a "pervert". character growth there and we dont need to get into how it happened. this is not about them, after all.

5. sumi wearing the red glasses to not let shardul's coworkers find out that she's a part of the parade.

6. the walkie-talkie during the scene with shardul's superior and his wife visiting them for tea is blaring about loud, barking dogs and the dialogues SEND ME.

7. kabir's text messages. you really need to pause to read them but they're so sus (i think he might be cheating? idk)

basically, it ages like an evergreen forest.

i didn't expect to walk into the theatre to watch an arthouse, indie film. at its core, what badhaai do has achieved is something phenomenal - it has retained what defines a bollywood movie while simultaneously portraying queer relationships as something not extraordinary or reserved for the "woke" segments of society. the characters aren't just their sexualities and sumi says it herself: "hissa hain, puri zindagi kaha hain." (trans: it's just a part of us, not our entire life.) shardul slaps his lover, kabir is an asshole, sumi decimates her partner's career, rhimjhim makes assumptions on shardul's sexuality, etc. it is bad enough that i have to sit through homophobes calling this as a disgusting film filled with obscene scenes, giving their low-iq opinions on why it's wrong. now i have to sit through seasoned, jaded queer individuals like me, give some of the worst reasons to cancel a film and call it problematic?

The characters are not pinnacles of perfection and I'm here for it. I don't want a cardboard vincian protagonist. some

of the reviewers clearly don't understand what nuance is and I'm okay with that. some of us who have grateful access to resources and inner pride meetings forget that there are those still in closet, those who still don't know that gender is a social construct. that we still live in a country which has some of the most homophobic outlooks. sure, homophobia was a concept popularized by the British, but are we really going to forget that there are scriptures dated BC that have specific laws for punishing lesbians? homophobia has been as rooted in our culture as the urge to search for a suitable groom for a girl the minute she comes of age (the number may change with each passing century, but does it really matter?).

those that go as far as the city's outskirts for a chance to live a life free from the heteronormative eye. there are also those who want a child as their own. what's so heteronormative about that? what's so heteronormative about wanting to be a mother? are we seriously going to nitpick on the littlest things? and let us not forget that guru isn't at all interested in the child. he states this himself and is hesitant to join Shardul until he is told that it is just to be by his side. the ending is not meant to be perfect. heck, I would go as far as to say that the true ending was when it was just Sumi and Shardul with the child. perhaps the filmmakers wanted to offer us a happy ending, or at least, a bittersweet one. and i will quote the director from his interview with PeepingMoon: "they never really come out of the closet. instead, the closet just gets bigger."

this is coming from someone still in the closet, living in a somewhat conservative society and still grasping with their own gender identity. my closet keeps getting bigger, with the recent addition of my mother to it. watching this movie encouraged me to come out to her and my mother to give some of most supportive words a queer child can hear. and for that, i cannot thank Badhaai Do and its makers enough for it.

[magicalgirlsirin]

hi you got me interested in tokusatsu and i was wondering what would be a good one to start with?

[insert sickos yes!!!! meme]

right okay so starting off with the big three series

Ultraman R/B: i admittedly have not watched this, but i consulted with my friend henri who has and this was the top recc for ultras. so yknow! reports say theres lesbians in this. in general seasons of ultraman tend to be shorter so its an easier watch

Kamen Rider Fourze: this is genuinely such a good rider which is why my url is based on it. the setting is just, japanese high school based on american high school but specificially the kind you see in movies about being in high school, starring gentaro who is determined to befriend everyone in the universe, and a very cute space theme + the power of friendship. when i was watching it i kept being like "wow gentaro is literally a magical girl protag" bc he has such infectious cheerful energy :)

Gokaiger: I feel like this is THE quintissential anniversary season. funky space pirate polycule accidentally stumbles into the role of protecting earth. There's a lot of features of past sentais as well as tons of actors reprising their roles for this one, so if you spot a different sentai you think you might like this is imo the best showcase of it. ahim is also #mygirlboss

now this next recc is an independently made toku but its really really good and i'd be remiss to not mention it

Dogengers: Local heroes in the Fukuoka prefecture are left scattered to the wind after the villainous Yabai Kamen manages to take over! It's up to a newly recruited hero, "Rookie", to bring them back together. Dogengers also has a second and third season, being Nice Buddy and High School, respectively.

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Okay now this section is like "ones I really enjoyed but I wouldn't really consider them incredibly optimal starting points but i like the them"

Shinkenger: Shinken is a bit more of a serious romp, but its done soooo well it makes me go silly mode every time. Featuring a crew of samurai descended from a long line of warriors, they're all just doing their best to finally defeat the evil spirits that enter the human world. Takeru is such a team lead ever and i like how everyone on the team has a different opinion about their duty. yknow.

Gekiranger: GECK GECK!!!! tldr there are two schools of arts in a power struggle, beast arts and evil beast arts. you will never be able to guess who the antagonists belong to based on these naming conventions. starring the most feral man i have ever seen in my life [bc he was taken from the jungle], jan, who is a naturally talented fighter chosen to help defeat the evil beast arts users for the sake of humanity or something. my personal favorite character is mele who is in fact evil but she was really hot while doing it so she gets a pass. her transformation is a chameleon and her suit is designed so that the eyes of the chameleon are positioned directly where her tits are, which is a detail i cannot ignore

Donbrothers: this one is currently ongoing and frankly i dont know how to explain it. its definitely a departure from traditional sentais, featuring the main team in more of an ensemble arrangement since for the majority of the show they dont all know each others identities. theres a lot of major moving parts and its honestly a really wild ride, but i enjoy seeing how the different story pieces unfold. the main character is haruka kito, the most 17 year old high school girl ever who is a disgraced mangaka. she is stubborn and honestly a spitfire, and there is something wrong with her. at one point she gets kidnapped and goes "wow! this will be a great experience to put into my next manga!" even though there is not a single publishing agency that would touch her stuff with a 10 foot pole. she is an inspiration to me to become less normal. donbrothers is technically a sequel to the series right before it, but i dont think you need to watch it because there is exactly one character carried over and he is nothing like how he was in the previous season.

Den-o: oughhh the . with the scrumbly... den-o is genuinely one of my favorite riders as well. the main character Ryoutarou is one of the most sopping wet pathetic 18 year old guys ever and he is being so brave about it. hes a bit of an airhead and definitely a pushover, but its honestly one of the reasons i love him so much. den-o is about ryoutarou becoming a rider with the help of possession from 4 other imagin, which are beings sprung up from the sands of time which seek out people with strong desires to grant their wishes. once those wishes are fufilled, the imagin can enter the past of a person and wreak havoc. the goal of most normal imagin[read: not the ones that hang out with ryou] is to destroy the future, but Ryoutarou and his gaggle of weirdos ride the Denliner to help protect it. It's soooo good okay. den o was super popular so it has a billion spinoff mini series and cameos in other riders but i think it stands best on its own

Exaid: now i want to be clear here and tell you. exaid is not good. exaid is okay and is good in my mind. but it was my first rider so i am attached. It's a part medical drama part video game full time wild fuckin ride where our main character Emu Hojo becomes an intern at a special hospital unit where the staff is able to transform into riders to help fight against the Bugster virus, a special strain of disease that if left untreated allows bugsters [video game entities] to manifest in the real world, killing the patient in the process. The medical drama part is really just a catalyst to the video game stuff, but seeing Emu have his patience tested by the most insane men in the world is worf. Also the nurse Asuna/Poppy is literally sooooo virusgender and I want to steal her gender so bad. i would talk abt dan kuroto since youve probably seen me post abt him before but i feel hes best experienced than explained. just know hes got autism and issues.

Changerion: prolly the oldest toku ive picked up, this one isnt really comparable to anything. its definitely slower paced than the other series ive reccomended so far, and it can definitely feel unfocused. it also suffers from having a reduced episode count [which was cut due to lack of popularity]. in spite of this, i think it was one of my favorite watches ever. The main character, Akira, is a wildly out of control bisexual man. on adderall. He's a detective without work and the first case he manages to land in a while ends up with him in a car crash that grants him the ability to transform. However, instead of being excited with his new purpose in life, he pretty much just tries to slack off and dodge responsibility as much as possible, much to the chagrin of Hayami [the man originally meant to be the one transforming]. Akira very reluctantly fights against the darkzeid, who feast on humanity for power and can open gateways to whats pretty much just a hell dimension. Kuroiwa is a standout character as well, being an antagonist but just so bizzarely charming he ended up as a favorite. He's a darkzeid who wants to integrate with humanity but instead of finding normal ways to do it, he just tries taking over japan. yknow how it is.

EDIT: chewing on glass how could I forget

The High School Heroes: this is only 8 episodes very short but also the episodes are long so it's longshort. Featuring a tokuota (toku otaku) who's obsessed with gorengers(first ever sentai) bringing together his classmates to form a defense club since students keep mysteriously turning into monsters! Also featuring a transfem character who's arc made me cry and she's also my best friend btw. There's a lot of references to gorengers overall but you don't have to know it to go oh it looks cool

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sorry this is such a long post i wanted to give you a lot of options and also just like. theres a lot of good points to different series and each one offers something different in theme and tone. also i probably couldve recommended more but this is already such a big list. okay glhf