#i think i have a window seat tho so that’ll be nice

[mostlyvoid-partiallyflowers]

i am god’s strongest soldier (tummy hurts in a new jersey airport)

[lets-talk-appella]

i’m nobody’s but yours

Chapter 15/25 - Beca

Summary: Beca is straight as an arrow. 100%, totally, completely straight. Except for one problem that 100%, totally, completely changes everything: Chloe Beale.

Title borrowed from Calum Scott’s “If Our Love Is Wrong.”

Word Count: 4k

Rating: M (for dark themes, homophobia, masturbation, and eventual smut in later chapters)

TW: This chapter depicts homophobia, hate language, and slurs. Please be prepared for that.

AO3, FFN, and below.

The sound of her phone buzzing incessantly shatters Beca’s concentration. She reluctantly drags her eyes from her laptop screen and reaches for her phone, seeing several texts from Jesse.

J: How’s it going?

J: Becaw!

J: Are u with Chloe?

J: I bet ur with Chloe

J: Did u guys do it yet?

Beca cringes and rolls her eyes. There’s just something that seems so very wrong about her ex-boyfriend asking about her current girlfriend (even thinking the word still makes butterflies flutter in Beca’s stomach). She types back the only thing she can think to say to that.

B: Gross.

His reply is almost instantaneous.

J: If u think it’s gross u might have to reexamine

J: Again, I mean

Beca sighs, giving her laptop a last regretful look, mourning the loss of her productivity. She pushes her chair away from the desk so she can prop her feet up on it while she types up her reply.

B: I mean you asking about it is gross. It’s weird, dude.

J: It’s been like forever tho

Beca scowls. It most certainly has not been “forever,” and besides, it’s really none of his business in the first place.

B: It’s been 3 weeks.

J: Forever

B: You’re weirdly invested in this. Stop.

J: Just trying to be ur lesbro. If I were gay for Max, I’d expect u to support me

Beca snorts; if Jesse were, in fact, “gay for” his new roommate, she supposes she’d be asking him just as many questions about it.

But not those kinds of questions.

B: Supportive is different than asking if we’ve done it. Are you gay for Max?

J: Don’t think so

B: Great. Bye, Jesse.

J: Bye!

Beca sighs in relief, placing her phone face-down on the desk. She returns to her laptop, lowering her feet from her desk and scooting her chair back in place. Just as she moves her hands to the keyboard, though, a light knock sounds on her closed bedroom door. Unlike Jesse’s intrusion, this one is welcome; she smiles, the familiar sound filling her chest with warmth, and calls, “It’s open!”

A second later, the door opens and she hears light footsteps on the stairs leading up to the room. Beca looks over and catches Chloe’s eye, peeking over the railing.

“Hey, how’s it going?” Beca greets her, grinning happily when Chloe walks toward her with purpose.

Instead of answering, Chloe rests one hand on the back of Beca’s chair, pushes it away from the desk, and, with practiced ease, swings a leg over to settle into Beca’s lap with a contented sigh.

“Oh, hi,” Beca manages, her hands rising automatically to Chloe’s hips to steady her and keep her from falling backward.

“Hi,” Chloe grins down at her. “Have a second?”

Beca nods, already tilting her face up, and Chloe leans forward until their lips meet.

They exchange kisses for several minutes, Beca losing herself in the feel of Chloe’s body warm and solid against hers, and of her lips and tongue moving languidly against her own. No matter how often they kiss, Beca doesn’t think she’ll ever tire of the way it makes her entire body light up and hum in response. She’s starting to think that any minute not spent kissing Chloe is a minute wasted.

Her hands slip up the back of Chloe’s shirt, fingers idly drawing patterns against the warm skin of her back. Her touch grows bolder, sliding up to trace over Chloe’s bra strap teasingly and back down. Chloe hums and presses even closer, her hands letting go of the back of the chair in favor of sliding into Beca’s hair, cradling the back of her head and holding her close.

After several minutes of this, their kissing comes to a natural end. Chloe pulls back somewhat reluctantly and turns around to sit in the chair so that her hips rest between Beca’s legs. Beca leans forward to wrap her arms around Chloe’s waist, drawing their bodies even closer together, and rests her chin on Chloe’s shoulder, inhaling the scent of her shampoo.

“Feels nice,” Chloe whispers, leaning into Beca.

Beca hums in contentment, watching Chloe examine her open laptop.

“What’re you working on?” Chloe asks, reading the screen.

“Applying for a couple of jobs,” Beca replies, pressing a kiss to the side of Chloe’s neck and smiling when it makes Chloe squeak a little. “Um, New York, mostly. Chicago, too, and Nashville.”

“All over, huh?”

“I want to keep my options open.”

“Right,” Chloe says faintly, leaning her head into Beca’s temple momentarily. Her fingers trace idly over Beca’s arms around her waist, leaving Beca’s skin twitching in response. Chloe takes a deep breath that Beca can feel, then asks, her tone a little off, “Do you wanna go on a walk or something? Take a break from this?”

“I’d love to,” Beca replies, now pressing a kiss to Chloe’s cheek, “but I’m meeting my dad and Sheila for dinner in, like, half an hour.” She glances at the time on her laptop. “Or, like, in twenty-three minutes.”

“Oh, that’ll be nice,” Chloe replies, her tone a little too bright to be natural. Her hands still against Beca’s arms.

Beca raises an eyebrow and looks at her as best she can from their position.

“Okay, yeah,” Chloe concedes, “I know, but they’re paying for dinner at least.”

“That is a good thing,” Beca agrees, leaning her cheek against Chloe’s shoulder. “I don’t know, my dad has just been on my ass about getting together since we saw them.”

The temperature in the room seems to drop at the reminder of their last encounter. Beca squeezes Chloe gently, trying to bring her back to the present.

“Well,” Chloe says bracingly after a moment. “Good luck, and tell them I say hi.”

“Okay, thanks,” Beca sighs. “I’ll need it.”

Chloe taps on her arms lightly once, asking without speaking to be let up. A little begrudgingly, Beca releases her hold around Chloe’s waist, allowing Chloe to rise from the chair. As soon as she stands, Beca misses her warmth.

“I’ll let you get some work done, then, before you go,” Chloe says, making her way back across the room. “Come find me later?” she asks.

“Definitely,” Beca promises. “Got something planned?”

“Maybe.”

Chloe makes a show of walking away, swaying her hips more than totally necessary, and consequently, Beca finds herself more focused on them than totally necessary. At the top of the stairs, she pauses, turning with a smirk, and Beca knows she’s been caught.

“Um, ah –”

Chloe grins wickedly, but before she can comment, the bedroom door reopens and Amy’s voice drifts up from the foot of the short staircase.

“Oh, hi, what were you two aca-lesbos up to? Better not have been on my bed.”

“No promises,” Chloe quips back, her tone less than innocent.

Beca closes her eyes, leans forward, and groans into her hands.

She’s totally whipped.

Beca parks Chloe’s car (they pretty much have an unspoken agreement that Beca can borrow it whenever she needs) in the lot of Platter o’ Peaches, her father’s favorite family-style restaurant in Barden. She turns off the car but doesn’t get out yet. She feels twitchy, electric, almost, as if some sort of storm is coming in the distance. The last time she’d seen Sheila and her dad echoes unpleasantly in her mind, setting her teeth on edge.

Well. I’m sure if you asked, maybe he’d be willing to be more than friends again. He’s good for you, Beca.

Honey, with your looks, you should be able to get any cute boy you want.

She hasn’t unbuckled her seatbelt yet, and for a moment she debates the merit of just driving away again. She could always claim she forgot about meeting them and try to reschedule. She has a feeling that won’t fly, though, and takes a steadying breath, resigning herself to her fate.  She unbuckles her seat belt with a grumbled swear word and steps out of the car.

She’d parked close to the entrance, so the walk is short. She hauls open the annoyingly heavy door, knowing she’s running almost five minutes late. Sure enough, when she steps inside and greets the expectant-looking host, she hears her name being called.

Glancing to her left, she sees her dad and Sheila already have secured a table toward the center of the restaurant. They both wave at her, her dad looking happy to see her, and Sheila appearing almost disappointed, as if she’d been hoping Beca wouldn’t show.

Beca can already tell this won’t be pleasant.

With a closed-lipped smile at the host, Beca walks over to their table, weaving through other customers. It’s a Wednesday just before dinnertime, so the place isn’t super crowded, but it’s far from empty. While no one sits at the tables directly next to Warren and Sheila, a group of what looks like businessmen sits at an adjacent table, and an elderly couple sits near the windows on the opposite side of the room. The back wall is lined with booths, only two of which hold small groups of people, already digging into their gravy-covered meals.

Beca reaches her dad and Sheila’s table, forcing a smile onto her face that probably looks just as painful as it feels.

“Hi, Beca,” Warren greets. “You’re looking well.”

She hates how formal he is. He never used to talk like that when it was just him and her mom.

“Thanks,” she replies, pulling out her chair.

“Cutting it a little close on time, though,” Sheila notes, taking a sip of her water.

Beca’s teeth clench together as she takes her seat. “Yeah, well, my hair took a while.”

She’d pulled it into a messy bun 30 seconds before leaving the house.

Sheila raises an eyebrow but doesn’t comment any further.

“So… how’s it going?” Beca asks, trying for at least some civility. She knows she’s probably being harsher than they deserve, but they had almost ruined her second date with Chloe.

“Really well, thanks,” Sheila answers, then follows with, “No Chloe?”

Beca’s back tenses against her chair. Sheila’s tone is neutral, and if Beca didn’t know better, she’d almost think Sheila’s asking out of polite interest. However, the way Sheila looks at her, as if waiting for her to stumble and give something away, is unnerving. Warren merely peruses the menu in front of him, seemingly oblivious.

“Oh, no, no Chloe,” Beca tries to laugh it off, moving her chair back closer to the table. “Why do you ask?”

“You two seem to spend a lot of time together,” Sheila replies with a shrug that’s probably meant to be casual. “I think you’re with her more than with just about anyone else, that’s all.”

“Yeah, well,” Beca stalls, hiding her nerves by unfolding her napkin and arranging it in her lap. “Just, we were co-captains. So, Dad, what’s good here?” She knows it’s a blatant deflection, but it’s the only thing she can think to do.

Warren looks up, blinking, as if surprised to be addressed directly. “Oh, you know,” he says mildly, though Beca most certainly does not know. “The burgers are always my go-to.”

“Awes, well, I’ll look,” Beca replies, hiding her faint blush at the use of Chloe’s word behind the menu as she starts to search for a decent lunch.

Thankfully, silence falls as all three of them examine the menus. Beca’s almost positive her dad and Sheila don’t really need the menu; they probably eat here often enough, since neither of them can really cook. Beca uses the time to try to calm herself down, reading each menu item through carefully. It’s mildly concerning that the only items that seem to come without some form of gravy are the salads and club sandwiches.

When the waitress comes to take their order, Warren selects a regular hamburger and Sheila orders a salad and soup, with a loud and unnecessary comment about watching her weight. When the waitress turns to her, pen and pad in hand, Beca panics a little and ends up ordering the turkey club sandwich, even though she doesn’t really like turkey.

As soon as the waitress leaves with their orders, Sheila opens her mouth, probably to ask about Beca’s personal dating life or something equally invasive, but Warren cuts her off.

“So, you’re applying for jobs, then?” he asks, leaning forward.

Relieved, Beca takes the opportunity to tell them about the various producer positions she’s uncovered all across the country. He seems genuinely interested, as does Sheila, and that topic of conversation lasts well after their food comes and they start to eat. She’s careful to avoid mentioning Chloe and her own job search.

The lunch is actually going surprisingly well, and Beca feels herself relaxing as their meal continues without incident. She’s already more than halfway done with her club – the bacon on it helps cover the turkey – when two women, slightly older than her and holding hands, enter the restaurant.

They’re very clearly a couple; not only are they holding hands, but they’re looking at each other in a way Beca recognizes from how Chloe looks at her now. Beca immediately tenses, her eyes flicking to Sheila, who appears too enthralled by her limp salad to have noticed the couple’s entrance.

Beca watches closely as the host greets the women with a friendly smile and – no, no, no – leads them toward the table Beca shares with Sheila and Warren. Beca’s shoulders tense and she stares down at her club sandwich, desperate to keep Sheila’s attention down and away from the couple. The host leads them so close to their table that it Beca can feel the air stirring as they pass, but she still doesn’t look up.

Beca wonders why the women aren’t more careful in public. A small, snide part of her thinks they should know better than to act like that around potentially hostile strangers.

It’s not until the host returns to his stand that Beca risks a glance over her shoulder to see where the women ended up. To her alarm, she sees there are only a few tables between them, the women sitting at a booth along the wall directly behind Beca.

If Sheila were to look up, they’d be almost directly in her line of sight.

“Are there usually tomatoes in this salad?” Sheila asks the table at large, poking at a leaf of lettuce with her fork.

“Um –”

“You know, I’m going to ask,” Sheila twists around, looking for their waitress, even though she’s almost done with the salad anyway.

Her eyes scan the restaurant, and Beca can tell the instant she sees the couple. Her eyes lock onto them and her jaw goes slack.

Beca winces, dropping her attention to her plate.

“It’s getting worse,” Sheila says in an undertone, her voice full of disgust.

“What is?” Warren asks.

“That,” Sheila emphasizes, and without looking up, Beca knows she’s either pointing or nodding at the women so Warren can spot them.

Beca’s stomach rolls. She doesn’t think she can finish her sandwich.

“Maybe they’re friends,” Warren sighs, sounding so tired that it makes Beca look up. “Or sisters.”

“Not with the way they’re looking at each other.”

Knowing that she can’t feign deafness any longer, Beca glances over at where the women talk over their menus, smiling at one another with clear affection and happiness.

“Ugh, as if anyone wants to see that,” Sheila spits out. “I have half a mind to ask to switch tables.”

“Don’t be dramatic,” Warren admonishes, rolling his eyes.

It doesn’t have any impact on Sheila.

“It’s in public now, everywhere,” she continues. “You know, ever since they passed that ridiculous marriage equality garbage, the whole country has gone downhill.”

“Sheila…”

“What? I’m just stating facts. That law has everyone in a tizzy. It’s rude, you know, forcing themselves on us, like –”

“I’m dating Chloe.”

The words come out before Beca can stop them, totally beyond her control and likely in response to the disgust in Sheila’s voice. As soon as they’re out, she wants to take them back, to rewind, to pretend it hadn’t happened, but she can’t.

Immediately, panic rises in Beca’s throat like bile; she’d never intended to come out like this, with just some throwaway comment that doesn’t even come close to describing the most important relationship in her life.

Warren stares at her, his expression blank and surprised. She can’t tell what he’s feeling, has no idea what he thinks of her. Sheila, cut off mid-sentence, only stares at her, mouth open. It makes her look very foolish.

Beca takes a bite of her sandwich in an attempt to settle her stomach. Her entire body is numb.

“What did you say?” Sheila asks quietly.

Beca can’t answer.

“You’re a dyke?”

The instant Sheila asks, Beca stiffens and grips her sandwich tightly, the word impaling her stomach like a knife.

Beca’s dad puts down his hamburger and turns to Sheila, his expression serious. “Hey, that’s not –”

“That’s what she said, Warren, not me. She said she’s a dyke.”

Beca’s ears are ringing and she struggles to catch her breath. This is all her fault. She’d messed up. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

“No, I said I’m dating Chloe,” she manages.

Sheila laughs, a cold scoff of a noise. “Same thing! Either way, it’s not natural,” she insists, then turns to Beca’s dad. “See, Warren, I told you they were too close, I told you it wasn’t right –”

Warren speaks over her, ignoring her scandalized expression. “While this is a, uh, surprise… we would love to get to know Chloe more, Beca,” he says kindly. “Why don’t you invite her over for dinner sometime?”

“Oh, sure, just encourage her!” Sheila throws her hands into the air, shutting down the idea before Beca can respond.

Beca puts down her sandwich, setting it back onto her plate. Her hands have started to shake.

A few people at the tables around them have tuned to stare, while simultaneously pretending they don’t notice anything amiss. Beca can only hope that the lesbian couple sitting behind her haven’t heard Sheila’s carrying voice.

“How long have you two been… how long has this been going on?” Warren asks carefully, compensating for Sheila by keeping the volume of his voice so low that Beca has to lean in to hear it.

“Um. Like three weeks,” Beca replies, not looking at him.

“Three weeks?!” Sheila gasps. “That’s – we saw you! Warren, I told you they’d been holding hands. I saw it!”

Beca knows she can’t lie.

“That was a date,” she whispers. On her plate, her food stares sadly back up at her.

There’s a beat of silence while Sheila and Warren absorb and process what she said. Beca’s eyes flick from the table to the door, mentally calculating how long it would take to for her to cross the distance.

“Beca, you’re confused,” Sheila begins in a sickly-sweet voice. “You’re not – what makes you think – how do you know you’re – like that?”

“How do you know you’re straight?” Beca fires back, meeting her in the eye for the first time in several minutes.

Sheila gapes at her in shock, while beside her, Warren seems to be trying to hide a smile. Beca shifts in her chair.

“You know what, I never liked this Chloe girl,” Sheila says pompously after a second, lifting her water glass to take a leisurely sip. “Suspicious type, and loud. Too friendly, like she wants something.”

“Sheila –”

“No, no, let me finish,” Sheila stops Warren and leans forward, extending a hand across the table to Beca, as if asking her to link their hands. Beca doesn’t touch it.

“Listen, Beca, honey,” she says quietly, adopting what is probably supposed to be a motherly tone. Beca hands curl into fists in her lap. “Did she persuade you? Is the threatening you with something if you don’t go along with her sick game? Has she touched you... inappropriately? We can bring her up on charges for that kind of thing.”

“Sheila!”

“It’s – that’s – no!” Beca argues back desperately, her eyes starting to sting. “I asked her out! I’ve wanted to date her for a long time!”

“I’m sure that’s what she let you believe –”

“No, that’s how I feel! I’m in love with her!”

“She’s brainwashed you into feeling something you don’t! You aren’t in love with her!”

Silence follows Sheila’s shout. Around them, the restaurant stills and heads turn in their direction. Warren shifts, looking awkward and uncomfortable, and reaches for his hamburger as if his wife and daughter aren’t engaged in a heated argument.

Gradually, the other diners around them return to their own business, and the soft hum of conversation around them resumes.

Beca breathes hard, staring at her plate again, trying to calm herself down. Yelling isn’t getting her anywhere. She needs to get out.

Before she can, though, Sheila says, much more softly, “Is that why you broke up with Jesse?”

“Oh my god!” Beca stares at her, incredulous. “Is that all you care about?”

“You broke up with him to be with – with Chloe?” Sheila presses, closing her eyes briefly as if Chloe’s name is a disgusting swear word.

“No, I – well, yeah, but it’s not –” Beca doesn’t even know what she’s saying anymore. She can barely hear her own voice over the pounding in her ears.

“You said you like women now.”

“I –”

Sheila leans forward again, glancing around to see whether she still has an audience. Satisfied that no one seems to be watching them, she says grimly, “You know what, I knew it was wrong to leave you with your mother for so long.”

“What?” Beca gasps, bewildered.

Warren looks up from his burger sharply, his eyes flicking between Sheila and Beca.

“Beca, I need you to be honest with me now,” Sheila continues. “Were you ever molested as a child? Did that turn you away from men?”

Beca’s jaw falls open. She can’t think of a single thing to say.

“Oh my god,” Warren hisses, angry for the first time. “You can’t honestly believe that!”

“She hasn’t answered, Warren.”

He turns to Beca, looking exasperated. With a sick pang, Beca realizes he actually expects her to answer the question.

She’s never despised him more than she does in that moment.

“Of course I wasn’t molested,” she spits out through gritted teeth, her face warming with rage. “That’s just – that’s disgusting.”

Sheila sits back in her chair, annoyed. “No, honey, that’s us trying to get to the root of this problem. I know the marriage equality passing must be confusing, and I’m so sorry about that. You aren’t – you’re not gay, Beca. I think, if you try to get back with Jesse, or just even if you find the right guy –”

Beca rises abruptly from the table, her hands slammed flat against its surface. Her entire body trembles with rage and she knows she’s about a second away from crying in anger, but she refuses to give Sheila the satisfaction.

“You know what?” she spits, taking petty satisfaction in how her father flinches away from her. “I’m done. I’m in love with Chloe, and that’s all it is. What you’re saying is – it’s –” Beca growls in rage, furious her words are failing her now. She takes a breath, then says with as much poise as she can muster, “You have to get used to it, or this is the last time we see each other.”

“Beca…”

Beca doesn’t even glance at her father. She reaches down, snatches her purse off the floor, and digs in it until she finds her wallet. Snapping it open, she fishes out a ten-dollar bill and throws it on the table, paying for her own meal.

Without another look at Warren and Sheila – and with a silent apology to everyone else in the restaurant, and especially to the lesbian couple – she walks away from the table, head held high.

“Beca!” Warren calls again, but she ignores him as completely as he’d ignored her when he’d walked out on her and her mom all those years ago.

She flings open the restaurant door, storms to Chloe’s car, fingers fumbling with the fob to unlock it. She has to try twice, but she eventually gets it, wrenches open the driver’s door, and throws herself in before slamming it.

Resting her forehead against the steering wheel, she draws desperate gulps of air into her lungs, trying to calm down so she can drive. She’s still trembling head to foot, and her throat and eyes burn with unshed tears. Squeezing her eyes closed, she imagines what’s happening inside the restaurant, wondering how long it will take her dad to come after her.

She imagines she has time to kill before that happens.

She yells out wordlessly in frustration; her heart still pounds and she wonders if she’s about to be sick. She knows she shouldn’t drive yet, but she needs to run, to escape from the mess she’d left behind.

Gritting her teeth, she starts Chloe’s car, turns the stereo up as loud as it can go, and, after fumbling with the seat belt until it clicks into place, tears out of the parking lot at top speed. It’s risky, and it’s stupid, and it’s impulsive, but she presses the accelerator down even further, her only thoughts of escape and of the home she has in Chloe’s arms.

[nico-robin-official]

Dragon Ball Super: Broly

IT’S REALLY FUCKING GOOD GO SEE IT

(spoilers below the cut)

I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS

The first story segment felt more like Star Wars than like Dragon Ball, and I meant in a good way. It’s interesting to see people who aren’t QUITE so superhumanly powerful dealing with more ground-level threats.

Paragus is a stone-cold bitch. Straight up murdered that guy (Beets? Was he really just called Beets?) to conserve on supplies.

I’m glad that they addressed this as being like. An oddity for Bardock. He’s USUALLY a hardened Saiyan Warrior, so him going out of his way to be protective for once is weird, but sometimes people are weird. And that’s fine.

Gonna be real, I damn near cried at “Don’t forget us, Kakarot”. Like shit, u really gotta do it like that?

Now what’s REALLY weird is that when Frieza was dropping the Death Orb, Bardock’s armor was still all fukt up and he had a bunch of people behind him? So how’d that happen in the rectified timeline.

Nice that his final effort looked SLIGHTLY more valiant this time, rather than being comedically swallowed by Frieza’s attack.

The time skip forward was nice, and the sparring match between Goku and Vegeta was GORGEOUS. Like, just pulling out all the stops from the get-go.

I can’t believe Frieza has gone full Commander Red. Seriously dude. Have you sunk so low? I mean, it was hilarious, but STILL.

On a related note, Booberry has the biggest balls in the entire Frieza Force, holy shit.

Thank fucking GOD the vengeance boner is pointed squarely at VEGETA this time. It just makes more sense.

The Vengeance Boner belongs ENTIRELY to Paragus this time as well, which ALSO makes sense

Broly is a baby. baby boy. Like I know hes 41 but hes still my baby boy who i would die for. HE DOSNT EVEN KNO WHAT WATER IS

Paragus, regardless of canonicity, is a Bastard Hell Man. Rot Bitch.

Cheelai is a darling angel girl. Protecc her.

I fucking love that there is like, a visible stylistic difference between Vegeta and Goku. Vegeta gets a lot of harder hits in on Broly, but Goku show a lot more skill in evasion, throws, and redirection of hits. Once they finally fuse, they’re skillsets are GORGEOUSLY merged, with parries following into devastating hits.

I also loved the fucking wrestling announcer-esque voiceover in the soundtrack.

Speaking of the OST, ALL OF IT WAS GREAT. THE WHOLE THING WAS FUCKIN AMAZING. DAMN SON.

They went HEAVY with the fakeout auras. I’m pretty sure both Goku’s and Vegeta’s turned green at some point, and Goku flashed white for a hard second to tease that good good Ultra Instinct. Glad they kept that one on the backburner tho.

Broly’s copycatting, though somewhat limited, makes him parallel with Goku even better.

Another really interesting note that I only realized while writing this: Paragus was killed to bring and more of Broly’s power. Fitting.

The way the fucking sicced Broly on Frieza was Fantastic. The fact that Frieza got his shit stomped for the better part of an hour (in-universe) is also Fantastic.

The fucking dimension break was REALLY weird, and though Gorgeous, I hope it gets elaborated on (perhaps in the anime version)

It was a VERY interesting choice to have both Gogeta Blue and Broly Full Beast Mode not get big transformation scenes. I would’ve expected either one to be a huge, show-stopping moment, but no, they just kinda happened while they were in Chaos Space.

What a fucking magnificent way to have tension in the climax. “Will the Good Guys beat the Bad Guys” doesn’t really sell too well, we already know the answer. But “Will the sideline character be able to save Broly’s ass before he gets brutally murdered by the ‘Good Guy’”? I DIDN’T FUCKIN KNOW! I was actually on the edge of my seat hoping for Broly to Survive, and when his pupils came back just before that Kamehameha I thought the twist was gonna be they restored his sanity just before Gogeta dealt the final blow.

Broly and Goku are fightin buddies! Yay!!!!!

I know why, metatextually, they had Goku say “call me Kakarot”, but from an in-character perspective it’s... interesting? Usually he’s pretty intent on people calling him is Earth Name, but maybe contact with more Saiyans has lead him to want to keep reminders of his Heritage a bit more.

The use of lighting and coloration throughout the film was AMAZING. One of the moments that stood out to me was when King Vegeta mentioned how Broly’s power could eventually drive him Insane, it cut over to a vividly green Stained Glass window, with Green of course representing the aura of the Legendary Super Saiyan form. I really want to watch this movie a few more times to do a more detailed analysis of color, but that’ll have to wait until it’s posted somewhere online released on DVD. I’m not MADE of money folks.

I can’t think of anything else to say at the moment but I’ll probably have more later.

Hey anybody else notice that Capsule House only had one bed?

[justbelustful]

just a misunderstanding

character: kim donghan // jbj

writer: admin love

genre: smut

summary: you unintentionally make donghan jealous, and then it becomes less accidental. however, donghan has a punishment in mind for you.

warnings: jealous!donghan, dom!donghan, rough sex

word count: 1.7k

a/n: i’m a little out of practice for writing smut, i’m sorry! i love donghan and hopefully i did him justice.

you hadn’t seen donghan in six months. first produce 101 took your boyfriend away and then not long after that he was occupied by jbj. of course you were happy for him, you had never seen him so happy, but you missed him. 

 while he was gone you started to hang out with an old guy friend from high school. he had texted you asking if you wanted to catch up and you agreed because you had nothing better to do with your time. 

 you went out for coffee a couple times and then it became a regular routine. you would hang out often and people on the streets would often mistake you for a couple. 

 you were in the middle of getting lunch together when you got a text from donghan. 

 [bby] 

babe? where you at? i’m home 

 [you] 

i’m out with a friend, i’ll be home shortly 

 [bby] 

 come home soon! i miss my princess 

 you blushed at the pet name. it had been so long since he called you that. “sorry that was my boyfriend texting. can you take me home?” 

 “yeah yeah of course,” 

  you hadn’t even gotten your keys in the doorknob before donghan opened the door himself and pulled you into his embrace. “i missed you” he whispered, inhaling your shampoo. 

 “i missed you too, sorry if i took too long,” you whispered back before letting your purse hit the ground. 

 “movie night?” he asked. 

 “of course,” 

  “so how’s b/f/n?” donghan asked, draping his arm over your shoulder.

 “good i think, i haven’t been hanging out with her much” you replied leaning into his warmth. 

 “i thought you were out with someone?”

 “i was,” you hit his chest, “what? you think i don’t have any other friends?”

 “that’s not it. i just haven’t met anyone else. so, who’s the lucky gal who stole my girlfriend?” 

 “oh it’s mason, we went to school together and we’ve been catching up,”

 “oh” donghan said before turning his attention towards the tv.

 nearing the end of the movie donghan pulled his phone out of his pocket. “i’m sorry babe, apparently we have an emergency practice, i gotta go.” he said pecking your cheeks and grabbing his jacket.

 “it’s okay, i’ll find some way to keep myself entertained.”

 “thanks for understanding, i’ll try and be back early tonight so we can cuddle. i love you!” 

 “i love you too,”

 you pulled out your phone, “hey mason, donghan just had to leave for a schedule, want to go get dinner?” 

 “sure, i’ll pick you up in fifteen,” 

 you fixed your makeup and hair a little so you looked suitable in public. you were cold with the absence of donghan’s warmth, so you found one of his smaller hoodies and put it on, smiling every time you breathed in his scent. 

you heard mason pull up and you took your place in the passenger seat, blasting jbj in mason’s ears. 

 “thanks for hanging out with me so much, i’ve been kinda lonely without donghan,”

 “no problem,” 

 the night went on and you continued to crack jokes when mason tapped your shoulder and pointed behind you. you glanced over your shoulder and saw a guy around your age who was leaning against the wall making obvious stares at mason. “ooh,” you cooed at your red eared friend. “go get him tiger.” 

 “are you sure?”

 “yeah i’ll find someone to pick me up,”

 “thanks y/n” 

 [bby] 

where do you keep disappearing too? are you with mason? 

 [you]

 sorry i got bored.. i’m at the bar a few blocks from our house, come get me?

 [bby] 

 why can’t mason bring you?

 [you] 

 he’s kinda busy.. please baby?

 [bby] 

fine

 you could feel the jealousy in his texts. you smiled to yourself staring at the couple picture as your lock screen. “why would i ever leave you?”

 “princess,” you glanced up to see donghan with his window rolled down. “let’s go” you got in and pecked donghan on the lips.

 “how was dinner?” 

 you thought back to his jealousy earlier and thought of a plan. “it was fun! mason’s really funny and he’s been keeping me company when i got lonely!”  

he cocked a brow, “oh?” 

 “yeah, he’s a great guy!” 

 “that’s nice princess. i’m tired from practice so we can save this for tomorrow?”

 “okay daddy, whatever you say” you saw him visibly tense at the name that you rarely called him.

 “babygirl..” his hand rested now on your thigh with the other on the wheel, “i’m already frustrated enough, don’t bring something on yourself you can’t handle,” his hand gave you thigh a slight squeeze, ghosting his fingers over your heat at almost every stop sign, adding some pressure every now and then to make you squirm. he pulled in the driveway and retracted his hand before getting out of the car. you pouted, you were so close to getting the attention you didn’t know you needed. you went inside and changed into some pajamas, laid on your bed and texted mason.

 “how’s your mysterious lover boy?” 

 [mason] 

his name is elijah and he’s great, i’ll introduce you sometime. don’t steal my man tho 

you giggled, “i don’t think that’ll be a problem. you’re a great man”

 “who are you texting” donghan called. 

 god damn you missed this view. 

 his brown hair was wet and pushed off his forehead, dressed in nothing but gray sweats, he plopped next to you on the bed.

 “i know i look great princess but please answer the question,”

 “mason, he-“ donghan took the phone out of your hand and set it on the table beside him. “how hard is it to get your attention, because for mason it seems pretty easy.” 

 “i texted him first, you kinda left me hanging there in the car,”

 “so you text another guy? real clsssy y/n,” he sighed turning away. 

“donghan seriously? i love you,” 

 “prove it,” he snapped turning towards you, his eyes darker than they were a few moments before. “but like i said in the car, don’t start something you can’t finish” 

 you leaned in connecting your lips. it took almost no time for donghan to respond, pulling you into his lap and holding you close. he pulled away and latched his lips to your neck, quickly finding your sweet spot, causing you to let out a moan. his hands rested on your waist, moving you against his thigh, before ordering you move by yourself. his hands found the buttons on your blouse and started to unbutton it, marking the new exposed area. “d-donghan” you moaned, the pleasure from his thigh bringing you to your edge. 

 “i hate to break it to you baby girl but i think ive become more attached to ‘daddy’” he said against your breasts that he had begun to abuse, “plus i don’t think you deserve to cum yet,” he growled, pulling you off of him and laying you against the bed. he began to massage your breasts, whines leaving your mouth as he did so. 

“i was so close” “i told you not to start something you couldn’t handle.” he smirked, “too late to back out now” he leaned back in to revisit your neck as his fingers found your waist band. he pulled off your shorts and panties, leaving you completely exposed to him. he made his way down to your heat, nipping at the sensitive skin every once in a while. his lips wasted no time kissing your inner thighs, taking the skin between his teeth every so often.

 “please just hurry up,” “princess is impatient tonight. what do we say y/n?” you sighed, the teasing becoming too much, “daddy please just hurry up” “good girl,” he practically pitted against your heat causing you to jump. he took your clit into his mouth and began sucking mercilessly, causing you to start moving and moaning loudly. his hands spread your legs, giving him more access to your heat. he gave kitten licks to the rest of your folds before taking your strip back between his lips, grazing it with his teeth. 

 “i’m so close, please donghan” you said with your hands in his hair, pulling him as close as you could. he pulled away, his fingers entering you instead, pumping slowly. 

“i think you messed up again princess,” 

 “fuck” you muttered, trying to grind against his hand. 

 “i don’t think so,” he said, removing his fingers. his hand made its way to his crotch. “god damn it, look what you did. guess i’m done with my fun, i need you baby girl,” he stripped himself of his sweats and underwear, lining himself up at your entrance. without warning his slammed himself in, getting a loud reaction from you. 

he began moving his hips fluidly, as if it was a routine he’s been practicing for and is finally showcasing. normally donghan would keep asking if you were okay because he’s like twice your size and doesn’t want to hurt you, but it wasn’t like that today. his hips bucked against yours at a great speed, focused more on his own pleasure than your own. you came first, screaming as your high was finally allowed. what you didn’t account for was that donghan might take a bit longer than you, his speed not slowly even at your cries for him to stop. 

you squirmed against his member, clawing at his back as the feeling was overwhelming. you felt the familiar feeling coil in your stomach for what felt like the millionth time tonight, when donghan pulled out, and collapsed out of energy.  

“i-“ you breathed out, finally given time to relax, “did you even mean to do it that time?” “well of course, i got what i wanted.” he grinned, pulling your body against yours, draping the both of you with your sheet. he fell asleep not long after and you turned to look at his godly visuals. you thought to yourself, “i love you loser, and only you.” you sighed, “now how am i supposed to break it to you that mason is gay?” 

[shadowyin-yang]

pre-school/kindergarten AU? idk

Send Me Prompts! 

Every time I thought I finished this I end up adding something new to it. = ~= Also, it took me so long to realize Fenders wasn’t even attached to this prompt. 

Verse: Modern-AU with magic (tho surprisingly I don’t think any magic was used in this)

Misc info: Pre-Fenders / implied some depression / OC Kid / long-term pining / (past) unhealthy expression of said-pining / I know with how our culture is it sounds like I’m trying to shoehorn a moral in. No, there is no moral. / I had this whole idea for “the other side” of the story from Fen’s POV. but that’ll only double the length of this. 

It was ruined. Mother said to not bring it to school in case it got dirty. And now it laid there on the ground, covered in mud, and missing an arm. Poor Mr. Meow. The plush was kicked around and stepped on and Anders couldn’t do anything to stop it. The boy did the only thing he knew how to do and started crying. 

He knew he had to be in trouble. This was all his fault. What if he couldn’t hold Mr. Meow anymore when he goes to sleep? He never should’ve brought his best friend to school. It was too late now. 

Surprisingly, his mother wasn’t as angry as he thought she’d be. She promised “we’ll get you a new one” but that didn’t matter. It wasn’t going be Mr. Meow. 

Anders couldn’t help but think about Mr. Meow for the rest of the week. Going to bed at night was scary, but his parents wouldn’t let him sleep in their bed anymore. He got apologies from the boys who hurt Mr. Meow but Anders knew they didn’t mean it. Everyone knew that adults just make you do it. It was difficult going through the school without Mr. Meow. He didn’t seem to have an appetite. Eating lunch wasn’t supposed to be difficult was it? Anders at least tried. He was told that trying was all that mattered. 

Anders slammed his hand around until it eventually hit his target and the annoying blaring sound stopped. He groaned to himself before forcing himself to sit up. After rubbing his eyes he immediately smiled upon seeing Pounce curled up beside him. He gave his cat a light pat he started shifting to get himself out of bed. Anders immediately stepped onto a pizza box. Oh Maker, this apartment needed to be cleaned. It took one glance at the clock before Anders decided he’d have to pick up clothes and put away books another time. 

Anders made sure to keep himself on a schedule. Well, as close as he could get to one after being woken up at 2:30 in the afternoon. Maybe he should take up on Hawke’s advice on sleeping like a ‘normal’ person……nah. 

By 3:28 pm, Anders expertly parked his bike beside the medal fence, not bothering to lock it up (as no one would steal this squeaky piece of junk). He rushed into the building and pulled an apron off the hook by the entrance. By 3:30, his bag was shoved into a cubby hole, his apron on, and he stepped into the colorful playroom.

“Anders!” Merrill exclaimed from her seat with a book in her hands. The children all circled around her on the storytime mat. The children mimicked her hand waving and enthusiasm upon seeing him. 

Anders waved back. “Hi everyone! Don’t mind me. Go back to the nice story!” After the initial hellos passed, everyone’s attention went back to Merrill. And so Anders started picking up some of the toys. Trucks, dolls, fake food and utensils, books, and he shoved anything smaller into his apron’s pockets. He took his time, but had become rather efficient at collecting items and moving them all back to the correct containers on a timely manner. Unfortunately, the work didn't stop him from yawning occasionally. Maker, maybe he should’ve stopped for some coffee on the way over. 

3:45 and the day was over (for the kids anyway). 

Parents and caretakers started coming in to pick up their children. Anders stayed by the large window as he put away the big building blocks into their (bigger) toy chest. The view let him see the people coming in and out of the building. He wished he didn’t have to do this, but he must, or risk a confrontation that he rather not have. 

The Maker decided to be funny at that moment and that’s when it when it happened: He saw him. Hair was white as snow, markings that traveled all over the body, a handsome face, and perfect voice…oh how Anders hated how attractive he was to look at while simultaneously hating this man! The number of times this jerk of an elf made his days in school a living hell was a reason added to his regret for coming back to Kirkwal! Maybe he should return to school and get a Masters or something…

Still, if Anders was good at anything, it was avoiding this specific elf. Hawke still tried to get the pair to be in the same room as each other ever since Anders returned, but Anders has expertly avoided such a situation for months. He refused to cave no matter how much Hawke tried to paint the elf in a better light: “Just let him apologize to you, Anders,” “He really wants to get off on the right foot with you,” “Can you be willing to have an online conversation instead then?”, “Please give him a chance, Anders,” “Oh Makers breath Anders, you can’t avoid him forever!”

Maybe Hawke was right, mostly in the department of his ability to not avoid another person forever (especially if they’re in the same circle of friends). It already almost happened a few times ever since he got this job. 

“Uh, Merrill, can you be here for another 10 more minutes?!” he swiftly rushed up to the elven woman as she was starting to leave the room. 

“Oh, well, I don’t know if I can really-”

“Merrill, please! I’ll owe you! I swear!” he put his hands together and pleaded. 

Merrill, unexpectedly, looked down in thought. Anders mentally cursed. He sensed an answer he didn’t want to hear coming…

“Oh, I suppose another 10 minutes shouldn’t-”

“N-No! It’s fine,” Anders cut her off and waved his hands in front of him. “I can handle this. I’m a grown up! You go do your thing.” She always covered for him whenever he asked in the past. Letting her go on time for once in her life was the least he should be doing to make up for all those past 10 minutes she helped him with. 

With that response, Merrill beamed up at him. “Thank you, Anders!” she turned to skip away. At the door, she let out an audible. “Hello, Fenris!” 

Anders froze and turned to look around the room. Was there anything new to clean up? Wait, there was no need to panic! He’s in a room with children! Surely even Fenris won’t make an ass of himself in front of children and passing adults would he? Okay, sure, Hawke has mentioned a lot how Fenris is not as tensed up or as snappy as he used to be about mages. But still! Hawke wasn’t the one that was picked on! 

“Anders?” Fenris questioned upon walking in through the door. 

Anders turned around, trying to pretend he definitely did not know the other was coming. “…Fenris.” he tried replying as casually as possible and leaned on the craft counter. Said-counter being the only thing between himself and Fenris. Luckily, Fenris didn’t make an attempt to go around it. 

Fenris still raised a brow though. He looked away briefly towards the remaining children. “Hati!” he called out. A young elven boy with strawberry blond hair perked up from his puzzle. He got up to start collecting his belongings. Fenris returned his attention to Anders. “It must be my lucky day. I have always missed you whenever I come here.”

“Yeah, that’s some bad luck,” Anders replied as he folded his arms. “You know. Sometimes I’m late. Lucky me that Merrill doesn’t fire me but I try?” 

With a backpack on, Hati only stared at Anders in confusion as he approached. “What? But I see you go into the toy closet sometimes when I leave.” Hati reminded as took Fenris’s hand. 

“Oh? Mr. Anders likes to hide in closets?” Fenris questioned. Anders caught a light smirk when the question was asked. 

“N-Not at all! I was just looking for things! Toys are everywhere you know?” Anders tried to wave off, hoping Fenris doesn’t bring up the inconsistency. 

Fenris only blinked and continued staring with a straight face. Okay, so maybe he totally knows that Anders was avoiding him. “I suppose that is possible.” Fenris stated. Yeah. He, he totally knows. “Well Anders, I shall not keep you from your duties any longer. But now that I finally caught you during a shift…” Fenris dug around in his satchel briefly before pulling out a red apple and holding it out for Anders. “For Hati’s caretaker.” 

Anders took the apple and looked at it curiously. “…Merrill?”

Fenris’s face scrunched up. “You!”

Oh. Anders wanted to ask why. He wasn’t even a teacher. He doesn’t handle the children for long periods of time (he was pretty sure he wasn’t even legally allowed to be by himself). Sure, maybe not everyone knew he wasn’t a teacher, but still. Why does he get an apple and not Merrill? While questioning it, Anders continued to inspect the item, wondering if Fenris somehow got a worm in there. 

“…you do not remember.” Fenris stated quietly. Anders looked back at the other. He could’ve sworn Fenris sounded genuinely hurt by that.  

“What am I supposed to remember?” 

Fenris shook his head and offered a soft smile. “It is nothing. It…does not matter now.”

“What? Come on, you can’t just imply it means something and then not tell me.” Anders started to toss the apple up and down. It felt real at least. And it did look fresh. 

“I could…or…” 

Anders stopped his tossing and looked back at Fenris in worry. Oh no, can the apple explode or something? 

“I could tell you next time I see you.” 

Anders pouted. “Oh now you’re just up to something.” Well that’s disappointing. Though Fenris surprisingly didn’t sound very malicious about it for once. 

“Yes. I am up to something,” Fenris replied dryly, “That something being I wish to see you next time. I, however, will have see whether or not you cease hiding in the toy closet.” 

Anders wasn’t sure how to wiggle himself out of that. He could not tell if Fenris was giving a smile or a smirk though. But he didn’t stare long enough to tell. 

“Come, Hati. I have taken up enough of Mr. Anders’s time.”

“Bye Mr. Anders,” Hati waved as Fenris gently led him out. Anders waved back with a smile. He immediately dropped his hand when Fenris looked back towards him. 

When Hawke first informed Anders about Fenris wanting to see him again, Anders thought the whole thing would’ve been romantic (after all, who wouldn’t want to hear the hottest person in all of Kirkwall wanted to see you?) if their history throughout school wasn’t so damn awful. He didn’t expect Hawke to be persistent about it though. Usually, Hawke just let things be as they are. 

Avoiding Fenris did have its downside though. It often left Anders to be a bit lonely as he would end up staying home alone with his video games and books. Well that’s not too bad. Though Anders reasoned it was better than facing Fenris.  

Anders almost wanted to ask Hawke what was up with the apple he was given, but decided against it. He, begrudgingly, tried to dig up any memories in school that involved an apple. Did Fenris throw one at him once or something? A ball, mud, another ball, a stick…nope! No apples came to mind. Oh well. 

After finishing up at the Day Care, Anders took a bite of the apple before getting on his bike. Tasted normal enough. Tasted really good actually. With a shrug, Anders went on to his next job, apple forgotten. 

“Here Mr. Anders,” the young elf, Hati, went up to him the moment Anders walked in the next day. The boy held up a red apple. “It’s from Daddy.” 

Anders froze in midst tying of his apron and stared. It wasn’t his business but he didn’t recall being told from anyone that Fenris was with child. Were they related or was Fenris just a father figure? He shook his head of those thoughts and knelt down to accept the gift. 

“Well, that’s, um…very nice of him. Did he tell you why?” 

“Oh, Daddy says-” Hati’s hands went up to his mouth in surprise, “I can’t! It’s a secret!” with that, Hati giggled to himself. 

“Oh, is it a good secret?” 

Hati nodded excitedly. “Daddy likes you! He says you are smart and you will find out all by yourself!” Anders wasn’t so sure about that. Were they both talking about Fenris here? 

Anders let Hati return to storytime and he pocketed the apple in the apron. 

Fenris arrived by 3:50. Anders didn’t even have time to go over to the window to watch for him. Ugh, maybe he should just get this whole thing over with; just hear what the elf had to say and just go back to your life. Simple as that.

Anders still rushed over to the craft counter though, still much preferred having something big and long between himself and the elf. For safety reasons. They still had social media, so Anders wasn’t going to pretend he didn’t know Fenris doesn’t go working out with Hawke every week (while Anders sits at home with boxes of pizza). 

“Hello Anders.” Fenris greeted with a small nod his way. 

“…Hi,” Anders replied, once again, leaning against the counter and awkwardly trying to find something on it to occupy his hands. He settled on trying to make something out of construction paper. 

“Hati!” Fenris called out for the boy before turning his attention back to Anders. “You look more tired today.” Fenris noted out loud. 

“Oh, you know. It was just…a rough night.” Yeah, anxious thoughts of why he was given an apple. Now he was going to go to bed wondering why he got another one from Hati, who apparently refers to Fenris as ‘Daddy’ and Anders was not sure what that entailed. “It’s fine! I can just…pick up coffee after work.” 

“That is unfortunate.”

“Oh yeah, very…” Anders ended up with a paper airplane in his hands. Oh Maker, just end this moment before they get an awkward silence. 

“Did you by chance remembered anything…about the apple…?”

Anders looked over to Fenris, who surprisingly was looking away from him, almost like he was…embarrassed? Shy? Anders wasn’t sure if he could pinpoint it. He doesn’t often see Fenris in either embarrassed or shy to know for sure. He saw Hati come up to them and took Fenris’s hand again. 

“Um…no. I…haven’t. I’m sorry.” 

Fenris sighed. “It is alright…” Before Anders could say any more, perhaps suggest that he should just be told, but Fenris finally lifted his head again. It was a strange moment for him…Anders wondered if he ever really looked back into the other’s eyes. “Anders. I know we…have not had the greatest relationship…in the past.” 

Anders had to resist scoffing. 

“I have no excuse, and I know it might be…years too late. Regardless…” Anders blinked back a look of surprise when he watched Fenris’s hand tighten around Hati’s. “So…I apologize for everything. You do not need to forgive me. But…it would mean a lot to me if we could…talk again.” 

Anders found he could only stare dumbfounded. There was so much he could dismiss, so many questions he could ask only for nothing to come out. As if understanding exactly what he needed right now, Fenris and Hati said a swift goodbye and promptly left. 

Anders went about the rest of the day in thought. Unsure if it mattered that Fenris apologized, or if it mattered if they could be on talking terms…well, of course it mattered. If it didn’t, the apology wouldn’t have thrown his entire world upside-down. 

Maker, when was the last time they even spoke (minus yesterday)? Anders hated that actually remembered: It was the summer after graduation, on Facebook of all places. They had a fight: Mage this, mage that; Tranquil this and that. Anders never went back online after that. At least, not until he was safely away from Kirkwall. 

He went to Ferelden for furthering his education, and in less than a week away from home, he suddenly had reasons to go back online. There were parties to plan with Sigrun, homework to discuss with Nate, and relationship talks with Hawke’s own cousin. Anders still stayed in touch with his Kirkwall friends - most of them any way. He and Fenris never spoke. Though Anders also never removed the other from his friends list. No, he just hid the other from the feed. He wondered if Fenris did the same. But the way Fenris looked at him the last couple of days only made Anders wondered if Fenris saw something different in him. Did he see everything Anders posted about on his social media? The relationship status changes, the rallies he had gone to, the photos he took, photos taken of him, him getting Ser Pounce, the rants, and all the times he’d post something and then delete it later. How much of all that has Fenris seen? 

No, this was ridiculous. This was all just anxious thinking. Anders knew he didn’t have the most exciting life. Unless you found the fight for mage rights or relationship statuses changing being a form of entertainment. Maybe it was simply that Fenris changed. 

But none of this explained the apples. 

This led to Anders sitting at home, on his laptop, at 3 am in the morning. He stared at Facebook and wondered if he should start stalking Fenris’s page. 

No. That’s wrong. This is none of his business. 

Despite telling himself that for the past 10 minutes, Anders still hasn’t budged from the site. 

“Just the last few days” he reasoned. Okay, just a little bit then. 

Fenris’s profile photo was really cute. Dammit. Hati’s smiling face took up most of the photo, but Anders could see Fenris’s arm around the boy. His cover photo was of a nice graphical image of a wolf. He wondered if Fenris designed it himself…

Anders sighed and started scrolling through the page. Fenris didn’t seem to post very much as all the activity seemed to mostly be from the past couple of days. 

Fenris: Hati says he wants a cat and name him Skoll. I would assume this was the mage’s influence if it was any other name but Skoll. 

Hawke: GET HIM A DOG! :DD

Fenris: No. 

Anders chuckled. He admitted he has spoken about cats a lot to the kids. Out of all the kids, Hati seemed one of the most interested in hearing about his amazing Ser Pounce-a-lot! 

Isabela: I heard you finally saw Anders ;)

Fenris: I have. 

Isabela: And??? >:[

Fenris: And what?

Isabela: You know what! >:U What happened?! 

Fenris: I gave him a gift. He was working. I was was not planning to take up his time. Unlike some, I am not that rude. 

Hawke: Why don’t you ever give me a gift when I return from trips?

Fenris: You don’t need them. 

Hawke: :( meanieface

Anders only stared in confusion. What was that supposed to mean? Did he need an apple? Or was that just a simple jab at Hawke? 

The next post down made Anders’s heart stop. There was a photo…of an old looking, worn, cat plush…with one of its arms sloppily sewn back on. Hati was in the photo too. He laid on the floor, having a staring contest with the old toy. 

Fenris didn’t include a comment with the photo. 

Anders wanted to go hide back in the toy closet again. He didn’t want to confront Fenris about it, nor Hati. Though it must be a bit immature to act like this over it. These past couple of days have been ridiculous! Sure, life wasn’t perfect. Living with a cat in a crappy apartment with inconsistent sleep and lack of social life kind of sucked. But at least he got used to it! Fenris just had to come in and throw a wrench in that routine! 

So when Fenris walked in, Anders found himself behind the craft counter again. For protections sake. “Why do you have my old toy?” Anders blurted out before he could stop himself. Oh Maker, why?!

Fenris, however, didn’t seem fazed at the question. “I…held onto it. Well, I held onto it, then forgot I did until I found it again.”

“…Okay but why hold onto it to begin with?” It was old. Dirty. Broken. If he wanted to give it to Hati, surely Fenris could probably have found a toy for cheap and still be better looking and in better condition than that old thing. 

Fenris rubbed his neck in discomfort. “I…originally meant to fix it and return it. Then I considered getting a replacement. But…you do not just simply find an old toy anywhere. When I found it again you also were not…here. So I could not ask what you wanted.” 

“I…see…” Maker, was that really the only thing he could get out from his throat!? Anders could not believe it. He had practically forgotten most of his youth and just like that, it all came flooding back to him. 

The apple. Anders blinked a few times. Was his memory deceiving him? 

In mid-thought, Anders watched as Fenris presented a new apple for him. “I…apologize for keeping this information from you. I did not wish to ruin our conversation with…painful reminders. I did not think it would make for a good impression.”

Anders stared at the fruit. For some reason he felt he didn’t deserve it, while feeling a want to have it. It was a gift. It was his. Fenris remembered and thought of him. Fenris may even know him better than Anders knew himself. It only made Anders feel a bit awful about the whole ordeal. After all, he knew nothing about Fenris. Nothing. Despite that, Fenris still wanted to reach out to him and mend wounds that he caused years ago. Mending that Anders wasn’t even sure he really deserved. 

Maybe…maybe he could try. Maybe they could get to know each other again. Maybe they’ve simply misunderstood each other all this time…

He wanted to keep thinking about it. There were a lot of factors to consider after all. But he found his body moving despite that. Anders put his hands over the apple with a whispered. “It’s okay…I forgive you.” 

Anders found he still could not finish some of his lunch. A couple of days he even ‘forgets’ to bring it. Nothing was appetizing when you didn’t have something to make you feel protected. He didn’t speak to the kids at his lunch table, as they seemingly grew bored of him from being sad too long.

Anders blinked in surprise when a juicy red apple was placed before him. He looked up to see the gifter running off to the hallway. At least, Anders guessed it was the gifter. Not many other kids were running off like that, especially during lunchtime. Anders picked up the apple and followed. He didn’t need to go far as just from standing by the door he easily spotted one kid sitting down on the floor against the wall. Anders slowly went down the corridor to him. 

It hasn’t been long since school started, and he wasn’t familiar with everyone’s names yet. He still recognized this kid, an elf, as one of the boys who picked on Mr. Meow. So why was he given an apple by him? Maybe it was a mistake. “I think you dropped this.” Anders held the apple before him until the other boy looked up. He didn’t look long as his gaze went back back down to the ground, as if ashamed.

“…its for you…” he muttered quietly, still not looking at Anders.

Anders only stared back in confusion. Why was he given food? Out of all the kids in his class, even he can see the elf boy before him didn’t have a lot of it. He’s seen other kids sometimes even share their own lunch.

“…I’m not hungry,” Anders eventually answered. He had a feeling maybe the elf boy was though.

“I can’t take it.” the other boy replied matter of factly.

“Why not?”

“It’s a gift. So it’s yours now.”

Anders looked at the apple, again, confused. But what if he didn’t want it? Can you give gifts back? “It’s a gift…?” he asked. It wasn’t his birthday after all.

The other boy went quiet again and returned to staring at the floor. Anders didn’t say anything but he sat before the other. The elf didn’t seem to like it when you looked down at him. Anders tried to present the apple again but the attention wasn’t given to it.

Finally, the other boy started speaking again. “I’m sorry about your toy…”

Anders froze up. This was about Mr. Meow?

“I didn’t mean to make you sad. I wanted you to stop being sad…”

For some reason, Anders felt something good inside him. He didn’t know what it meant but it was a good feeling and that was all that mattered.

Anders offered the apple again. “Can we share it?” 

The look Anders got was of surprise, but even he could see the eager yes in those green eyes before the words were even said. 

He never got a new Mr. Meow, but things seemed okay now even without him. 

[therealbrittanychiz]

8.27.18

Welp I think it’s safe to say I suck at updating this thing. I’ve been thinking about it a lot recently though and I have sooo much that’s happened over the last year.

2017. It was the best and worst year of my life. If you read my last post I mentioned going to London and meeting Jenny for the first time! Well that was amazing. We had so much fun. I was really worried we wouldn’t get along or Denee would get along with her more than me but everything worked out fine! There were a few times were I apparently annoyed Denee and a couple times where she annoyed me so that rocked our friendship a little bit. Of course we’re still bffs and that’ll never change. But now we know to never travel with each other again xD Anyway! When we arrived I was so tried and we were running on 3 hours of sleep over the course of two days. Our flight had a layover in Iceland but it wasn’t too bad. We got lucky and landed the door window seat so there was lots of foot room! When we arrived we met up with Jenny and her dad. I literally had butterflies the entire time even after meeting her. I constantly had to pinch myself to see if I was dreaming! It was just so surreal I was finally with her. So we got to her house and just talked and rested up since the next day we had to catch the train to Paris!

Paris was incredible. It wasn’t too hot or rainy at all. I just wish I wasn’t totally exhausted and cranky (hangry)! So of course we needed food so we walked from our hotel to the Eiffel Tower just to look around. We finally found a place and I just got a sandwich so I was happy to just be eating. I was still tired so I was trying my best not to put Denee or Jenny in a bad mood either. I just stayed quiet and ate my food.

Afterwards we headed back and rested up. We went back out to see the tower at night and looked for a place to eat dinner and grabbed some snacks. The next day I felt much better after getting well needed sleep. I was also super excited for Disneyland! We didn’t really ride any rides since none of us were really ride people so we wandered around and shopped and had lunch. Then I saw they were having a meet n greet for princess aurora so Jenny waited an hour and a half with me so I could meet her! It wasn’t too bad. Denee went off on her own and apparently she met Captain Hook and had a sword fight with him xD so she kept occupied. On our way back to meet Denee we ran into the queen of hearts and tweedle dew and tweedle dum. They were fun! After that we grabbed slushies and we realized we had to be back to meet our bus to get back to our hotel. By then we were exhausted from walking so naturally I was the slowest and I was way far behind them but I made it eventually. We even waited like 20 mins for our bus to even get there! Still it was a fun day. We got back to our hotel and just hung out.

The next day was our Eiffel Tower day! We grabbed breakfast and headed out. The walk was actually much further than we anticipated. Still, we went all the way up to the top and it was so much fun! (More on this later). Then we did some shopping and wandered around and got some food.

Our final day in Paris was the louvre! It was incredible. It was so big and we didn’t even walk all of it. We maybe did half and by then it was almost time to leave. There was just so much to look at and we spent most of it trying to find the Mona Lisa! We found it though. It’s a lot smaller in person and the room was crazy crowded. It was still really neat. We then left and headed back to our hotel. That night we went to the arc de triumphe to see it all lit up. We took a few pics and went back.

We left Paris and headed back to Jenny’s house and I was sooo glad to be “home”. So we hung out for a while and got some sleep. The next day we headed off to London! We got a flat pretty close to everything so that was nice. Our first day we did the London eye and did a boat tour on the river of Thames. We went back to our flat after that and relaxed a bit.

The next day we had afternoon tea and got to see some more sites so that was a lot of fun! We also did the queens jewels tour and walked around the castles.

Then we went up to the actual palace to see the changing of the guards so that was really cool to see. When we got back to our flat we went to go check out the shard but we hadn’t booked tickets to go inside though it was still cool to look at.

Denee went back to our flat but Jenny and I walked around the little garden park and sat on a bench for a while and just talked. We headed back and grabbed dinner. It was our last day in London as well so we had to go back to Jenny’s the next day.

At this point in our trip it’s been almost two weeks. When we arrived back the next morning we just hung out and tried to rest. The day after that we headed to Harry Potter studios! It was so much fun and I think the place where I spent the most money xD

The next day we went to a little beach town with a lot of arcades and shops and places to eat. We got legit fish n chips and ate by the water. We also played some arcade games and did some shopping but Jenny got the times messed up and we had to catch our train. We just barely made it bc I was in line to buy something but I had to put it back since our train was literally leaving within that minute so luckily we made it on!

The day after that was mostly a rest day. We had a concert and horse races to go to that evening. It was a lot of fun! We saw a British group called little mix who I listen to all the time now :p we placed some bets and of course won nothing but it was still a great night! Our final day was resting and packing. It was a bittersweet moment but we didn’t cry xP

We finally made it back home after a long 11 hour flight with another layover in Iceland. I was so happy to be home as much fun as I had. I missed my bed and my dog! Poor Jenny tho was so sick after our trip but she finally texted me after a few days saying how much fun she had.

So yeah that was my trip to Europe! And I totally plan on going back in 2019. We shall see!

Now onto the bad stuff. Remember in my last blog where I said we were having a cookout with my uncle and Mommom? Well that never happened. I was in the middle of a game day with my friends like I had previously said. Then I got the second worst call of my life. My Mommom has been in a car accident and they were trying to revive her. I was still hopeful she’d be okay. Then I got the first worst call of my life. I screamed and cried when my mom called with the bad news. Not to mention I was in front of my friends and one of Juan’s friends whom I’d just met that day. Mary ended up taking me home and she stayed with me until my parents got there.

Mary went home and we went to the hospital where she had died. It was so hard seeing everyone so sad. Definitely one of the worst days of my life. It was so horrible and I couldn’t believe it was happening. I just wish she had been alive long enough to see and hear about my Europe trip which she was excited for me to go. However...

Back to the Eiffel Tower! I was connecting to their WiFi when all of a sudden the WiFi name “Linda” popped up! I was just in awe and I took a screen shot to send to my mom. So it was if she really was with me in a weird way. (Maybe telling me to get off my phone and enjoy the view!)

I still feel her around me sometimes and I dream about her constantly.

So now onto August 2017! My friend Crystal was getting married. It was an okay wedding. I was not a bridesmaid as she wanted a small ceremony but me and my friend Amanda spent the night with her at the hotel so that was fun. Like I said it was an okay day. I was so tired when I got home tho!

Annnd now onto October!! Mary and Juan’s wedding was SO MUCH FUN. Denee and I were her maids of honor so we made a speech and everything. I was so nervous I dropped my phone with some notes from my speech so I could remember it. It was fine tho! Ofc we danced and ate and it was an all around good day.

Other than that the rest of the year was pretty chill. We went to downtown Annapolis for fireworks on nye so that was fun.

Annnnd now it’s 2018.

Im writing because I’m having surgery next week and I’m really nervous about it. I say it’s no big deal but on the inside I’m like freaking out. I always got the feeling I would die at a young age so maybe this is it. I have no idea. Maybe I’m just looking too much into this and everything will be fine. Who knows! I hope I’ll live through it xD

Lately I’ve been feeling a higher presence of my Mommom and I even had a dream about her today while I was napping. It was weird, she told me not to have sex with Ryan. Which i say is weird because we had a convo about it the other day. It was a really deep and meaningful convo and we usually don’t talk about stuff like that since we aren’t together yet. So who knows. Maybe she was just warning me but I doubt it’ll happen?

Anyway, Mom, if you’re reading this now you know the real me. I’m sorry I’ve been hiding this for so long. But I wanted you to see the other side of me. I hope you’re not reading this because that means you’ve found the sticky note on the side of my night stand. It means I’m dead, basically.

I want you to know I’ve always had a deep connection with my power of empathy and you might think that’s weird and I’m more strange than you thought. This is who i am. When I was younger I used to think I was psychic but now I know its empathy.

If you’re still reading know that I love you and dad and Hannah. Even though we didn’t always get along we had the typical mom and daughter fights probably more than normal but we always ended things on a good note.

Let the rest of my family know that I love them all and I’ll be watching over everyone and haunting y’alls asses so be prepared 😈

Tell my best friends (Mary, Denee, Juan, Michael and Andrew) that they are amazing and wonderful and thank them for being my truly awesome friends.

Especially to Mary and Denee. Mary, mostly for putting up with me for 21+ years. And Denee for 16+ years. I’m sorry for leaving you guys and I’ll be haunting you tooo ;)

Also tell Patti thanks for everything. She was my work mom and I’ll always love her too. I’m glad we became friends even if we didn’t get along at first! Bethany too, thanks for being my best work friend!

And tell Jenny what happened. Tell her I’m sorry for not being able to do the cruise with her and even just visiting her next year. Because I really wanted to. Tell her I love her (In the friend way, I’m not gay, I promise) she just has to know I loved her.

I suppose that’s it. If I really do die, I don’t really have any special requests. Do what you think I would’ve wanted. Take what I have in my account (you know it’s not much) and pay off my bills and then use it to divide between the three of you.

Okay now I’m done. Sorry this was such an emotional post and I really really hope I make it to see September 6th.

Later for now!

~ Brittany