#i think about this soundtrack so often i am so glad it’s getting its deserved recognition

[maroonmused]

spider-man 2 soundtrack got nominated for a grammy yeah they knew “fighting back” single-handedly changed the world

[dentwy]

number 7: here is greenwood

GREENWOOD!!!!!!!!! WOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! okay i'm cool. "here is greenwood" is a shoujo manga serialized in hana to yume from 1986 to 1991 written and drawn by nasu yukie. in 1991 until 1993 it got adapted into a 6 episode ova and this is kinda where it ends i feel. i wouldn't say it has had any kind of major impact in the medium, the genre or any major group of individuals, but god i do think it did stir something inside me.

i either tend to gravitate towards stuff that isn't particularly popular, because i'm trying to come off as cooler than i am or simply because it just happens naturally. couldn't tell you, but finding that one little thing you end up enjoying so much without anyone else seemingly caring about it is always fun regardless of your personality. turns out it's a lot easier to become the biggest fan of a thing no one has seen, you know. a bit like becoming the world record holder of a game no one has cared to speedrun, it's just funny.

picking out what consists of "my favorite shows of all time" isn't so easy once you've been watching media more seriously after a while, those starting years will definitely shape you up and become a major part of the main stuff you like. even if you fully know it's bad, you hold it close to yourself because it was there at the start, and it's always nice to think back on that. so, it often happens with me where i certainly enjoy something enough to think of it as "this could be a favorite, but does it deserve the spot?". not even sure right now if greenwood deserves it, but i don't know if it matters that much. i decided to make a list of "favorites that aren't favorites" because of greenwood and even if it doesn't stay there and goes up into the list, it sure means something.

ironically, i don't quite think this show came out as a surprise to me as i'd been hyping myself up before even getting into it. it did, though, take turns i wouldn't have seen coming and i'm glad for that. these days i honestly tend to watch anime based on the soundtrack and it's no different here. the soundtrack showed up in online platforms on september of last year, which is around where i found out about it since i already follow nagata shigeru (even if i haven't even seen ocean waves, he just makes good tracks). my first mention of it over discord was me getting mad at my bank while i was dealing with my phone insurance after i tried reading one piece and got my phone stolen 13 pages into the first chapter, but that's a story for another day. i just said "this is the soundtrack of me killing a man" with a link to shun's theme , which is honestly accurate for any man killing activities. in context however, there's a bit more to the story.

this is why, to anyone caring to read, i want to do the longest and probably only essay / analysis / backtrack / retrospective / whatever the hell for "here is greenwood" you will find online. i HAVE to be that guy. otherwise, what have i been obsessing over this thing for around a month? the show has 6 episodes while the manga has 11 volumes (although viz squished it into 9 which is better), so i'll be basing myself on the pacing of the anime in relation to the manga, back and forth between them so the chapters match up. the manga does, however, have more stuff to it throughout half of its runtime so it's gonna be a lot of that i suppose. although, and i'll get into it later, the anime seemingly ends up being the more enjoyable version of the two. otherwise, skip to the tldr in bold letters to avoid reading the long ramblings of a crazy man skimming through a show and manga you probably haven't seen and read.

we begin with the hero of our story. he doesn't really have anything that would actually make him a hero, he's just a teenage boy just starting his first year of highschool at ryokuto academy. his name is hasukawa kazuya and i don't blame people for making him the least popular of the 4 central characters on myanimelist, but he's still technically the main character. our dear boy kazuya is moving into the ryokuto dorms, because it turns out he's kinda the unluckiest guy you'll ever meet. his older brother just married the girl he had a crush on, and since they don't have any parents left, they're all living under the same roof, something he simply can't stand anymore. he took the entrance exam for this prestigious boys only school and managed to get in, but in the process he: almost got ran over by a car while he was visiting the school, barely managed to take the entrance exam since the trains were stopped by a blizzard, had his acceptance letter delayed in the mail, and got an ulcer the day of the entrance ceremony that forced him to stay hospitalized for a month. even if god is against him, he persevered, and finally got in.

kazuya is hot headed (almost literally since he's prone to getting nosebleeds), overly serious yet still a bit of a goofus. he's not particularly smart, but he proves himself with the sheer effort he can put into the things he wants to achieve. he often feels like he needs to be stronger and grow on his own, failing to rely on others, as he doesn't really like getting pampered either.

he is introduced to the dorm head, ikeda mitsuru, and the president of the student council, tezuka shinobu. the two most popular, best looking, and important members of the dorms, currently on their second year of highschool. these two are the ones that will introduce him to "greenwood", as they call the dorms, since the full name is kind of a mouthful.

inside room 210 rests his roommate, which he's quickly informed is, in fact, a girl. according to them, kisaragi shun was born a girl, it's just that her birth certificate and every record lists her gender as male. by this point, 8 minutes into the first episode i'm already clocking out. i understand we're talking about japan here and it's the 1980s (rest assured, this becomes more evident as it goes on), but i have the sneaking suspicion that gender identity can't be this series' forte. from my understanding, hibari-kun does tackle these topics in a proper manner and it was also a manga from the 80s, so perhaps it's not completely unheard of. besides, shoujo manga isn't known to be scared of tackling stuff the rest would never dare, but still. me, the audience, and the guy on screen, kazuya, are being informed that he absolutely must keep this fact a secret from the all the boys at the school. if he does not, there will be consequences. added to the fact this guy is seemingly pissed off at his brother for not being "manly enough" since he "works as a nurse" at this school (and also the fact he got married to the woman he liked, even if she's at least a decade older than him), we're not looking too hot. whatever, i'll give it the benefit of the doubt.

3 days go by for kazuya living with a girl in his room, often going outside to let her change, being uncomfortable at night and trying to ignore people's comments of his situation. he finds out, however, that it was nothing more than a farce. shun isn't a girl, he's just a cute guy with long hair. this dude got tricked into thinking otherwise only so everyone in the dorms could bet on how long it would take him to figure out. "damn! i lost... if only it took one more day..." you hear a guy in the background. greenwood, refers to "a nest for bandits and villains" which is all this place is. as much of a prestigious school as this may be, it doesn't speak for the people actually attending it.

there's the guy that sleeps with his motorcycle, the club used to devote their time to a made up religion, or the duo that rent out their room as an arcade. the main trio that will share their time with kazuya stand out as much as anyone else, if not more, so we should get into them.

shinobu (on the right) is the son of a prestigious family. he's calm and collected, devious and cunning. not a lot seems to change his expression, as he's swift and decisive yet his has his mischievous side as he often enjoys messing with people, and specially his roommate. mitsuru (left), is the handsome, aloof guy that simply loves giving kazuya as hard of a time as he can.

shun, aka the most popular character in the show, is a confident, assertive and strong willed young man. it just so happens he kinda looks like a girl. it is very often played for jokes, but not once does he mind it and finds enjoyment in it himself. he is, in fact, "a guy with a gender", as you could say. he leaves his hair long because he likes it, he dresses up however he feels like and often more feminine because he finds it fun, and he just knows who he is and what he wants to be, which is highly respectable. i was mentioning earlier about his theme and it's honestly pretty fitting for the guy, there's something magical and cheery about it that really sticks out, while having a tone of that seemingly feminine side.

these four are the rag tag greenwood team, getting into trouble, helping others and messing with each other. guys that maybe wouldn't usually be friends with each other, but it's always the time and place that will bring people together.

most of volume 1 isn't too dissimilar from episode 1, they change around the order of some scenes for it to make more sense and remove or add dialogue for it to flow better, but most of the main events stay intact. kazuya's main goal is to stay far from his home to avoid thinking about sumire, the woman he loves and his now sister in law. this is what he's in greenwood for. it's not as simple as "running away" from it and his feelings, but trying to come to terms with it, get distracted, and find himself. the main overarching theme of this series is moving past a love that was not meant to be. whether it's by moving away, making new friends or finding new love, the goal is the same. ironically, the people around him don't really allow him to move past so easily, since his brother is still around all the time, his friends kinda make fun of him for it (because it is funny) and sumire herself is so oblivious to it that it keeps stabbing him in the heart which, yeah, i get it.

not sure if you, dear reader, has had the experience of being in a dorm with other people, or going through a moment of unrequited love, but it doesn't get any realer than this! for one, living with people close to you for a while is just a nice experience. always having people to rely on, to hang out with, to talk to, at any given moment. almost to the point you may start depending on it. as a matter of fact, the room i shared with other people for a bit was 211, the same one mitsuru and shinobu are in! for the other, trying to move past something like that isn't the easiest. in fact, it may just be the aftermath that's the hardest and that takes the longest, that is, finding the same feeling somewhere else. filling that spot with something new, or someone new. cannot really blame a guy for trying so hard to change his life around.

kazuya decides to stay in the dorms for summer vacation, as he insists he does not want to set foot home, and sumire decides to pay him a visit. not only her but his brother kazuhiro also plays fun with him at times simply because he likes to see his reaction. he's kind of a goat, but he does genuinely care for his brother. later he's informed he can't stay in the dorms for winter holidays, which is what forces him to go back home for once.

half of the first volume doesn't get adapted probably to improve the pacing, although the extra chapters also don't feel too substantial to the story overall. in one of them the lights go off at the dorms and a couple of girls get in, which they initially think are ghosts, only to turn out they're not. it's not that exciting of a chapter and the show does a better version of this a bit later on. besides, i believe that not showing as many female characters in the ovas works better for the series, as opposed to the manga which starts doing it more often from here.

after kazuya goes back home for the first time in a while, the boys meet up out in the city. here, they find a strange looking girl being tailed by men in suits. it only turns out this girl is "nitta mieko", an idol that simply wanted to get some free time for herself while her agency wouldn't let her. uh, she becomes a bit of a prominent character throughout the manga, while she doesn't really appear at all in the anime. to the actual plot itself, she doesn't do a whole lot, she just comes and goes from time to time. not much against her, it only feels like she's just there.

for another chapter, they're already on valentine's day, meaning they will get chocolate. shun mentions he's straight and he had a girlfriend already which the rest find strange, i suppose. both mitsuru and shinobu get all the girls from other schools to wait outside and throw chocolates at them, to which they run away from. kazuya has one girl that's a bit obsessed with him, yet he doesn't remember her name nor who she is. she mistakes shun for a girl, so she gives up on him quick, though. i'm a bit iffy with this chapter because even if it is supposed to be a well known fact that mitsuru is constantly getting girls to ask him out (and he's generally also unlucky with said girls) the anime doesn't actually show much of that, unlike the manga. i don't think this is bad though, it's more of a thing they just say but never really show as you're kind of invited to fill in the blanks for yourself. since it is only 6 episodes they obviously skip around a lot of parts of the year, and i don't think it's quite necessary to see everything they do, as getting a glimpse around their life is all you need to understand how they're doing and what a random day in greenwood can be like. the manga almost incessantly needs to show both mitsuru and shinobu as the popular guys and since we're talking about an all boys school, even if they are popular, it doesn't feel like it's something that should happen so often and at such a big scale, in my opinion.

kazuya also simply not knowing who the girl that has a crush on him seems off and a bit too early. i suppose his mind is still focused on sumire, sure. so, he's probably not ready to move on that quick? even then, the situation kind of presents itself in front of him and he simply fumbles it for no major reason, he simply does not know the girl from his previous school.

the final chapter sets up the next volume, where mitsuru gets abducted by none other than shinobu's big sister. the anime does a funny thing here on episode 2 where they kinda tell you "go read the chapter for context" but it doesn't really matter. the episode centers around shinobu's sister, nagisa, kidnapping shun's little brother, reina, who obviously looks like a little girl because feminine looking boys is a staple of the kisaragi household. this is, in turn, a direct sequel to the manga chapter.

nagisa hates her brother because he's kinda just better than her really. she's stuck up, pretentious, demanding and selfish. since they were little she always wanted to be seen as the superior one, and because shinobu doesn't give a damn about anything, he never really cared about whatever she tried doing to him. part of their father's favoritism towards shinobu must certainly come from the fact she's a woman, i will not deny that, and she has the right to be mad. she's still an awful person though and only wants her to be the one to inherit the family business. so, to "take revenge" on him, she decides to kidnap his friend. genius!

part of the volume is dedicated to them finding out it's her and then going to save him. in the process mitsuru tries to escape and makes fun of her. he ends up with only his underwear on to, uh, make it worse for him? i guess? in the process of escaping mitsuru gets his face cut which was supposed to be something they planned on doing to ruin how pretty he was or something, but apparently mitsuru has superpowers so the skin on his face simply fixes itself instantly. now, greenwood isn't scared of the supernatural, weird things will happen. but having his face regenerate is a bit too much in my opinion. i think it would be a really solid joke for him to "suddenly be fine the next page" instead of it actually and legitimately being superhuman. would play on the meta and sell the ridiculousness of it even more. which seems even weirder considering nasu loves to play with meta jokes. she will often draw herself commenting on facts or details that don't really make sense so she can address them herself, or have the characters directly refer to her or the manga as a whole. in this same chapter in fact, she mentions how it doesn't make sense that they're still in their first and second year of highschool if holidays are already over. i think some of these jokes are fine, but nasu loves doing it a little bit too much for my taste.

anyway, what the anime does instead, as i mentioned, is have shun's little brother be the victim. nagisa decided that she won't deal with boys anymore and only cares about girls now, so he picks up reina instead (unbeknownst to her that he's actually a boy). i think this take on it is better, since shinobu ends up knowing what the deal is way faster and manages to figure out a plan for the rest of the boys to follow. reina does, too, mess with her and her agents by asking for food and to take a shower, which gets weirder than it should! these guys kinda get really flustered about the supposed little girl they've kidnapped which is extremely weird (one of them even trying to peep while he's taking a shower!). nagisa is also really weird about it at the start but we know for a fact she's a terrible person so whatever. it tries to follow with the joke that people often mistake the kisaragi boys for girls, but it could've been something else, you know. specially when it's grown ass adults we're talking about, but whatever, it's still a fun episode. all of this ends with shinobu giving his sister a final warning, effectively pointing a gun at her and saying he was gonna take care of her this time for sure. only to turn out it's a toy gun. a little detail that stands out at the end of this episode, in a strange way, is mitsuru making fun of kazuya for developing a crush on igarashi miya, a girl from an all girls highschool that will become relevant later. it's a bit funny because by this point they have never shown the two of them interacting, and the first time that he will see her is later on in the anime. however i think it's mostly working as a little nod of foreshadowing, as the events in the ovas don't really seem to be in chronological order.

what is honestly surprising is the chapter that follows this, still on volume 2. a side story about two guys from the dorms in room 117 ending up as a couple and finding out they're gay. i'd honestly recommend just reading this chapter, as it's surprisingly good and i'm almost left wishing they had adapted it. they sure do the "but it can't be, he's a guy!" / "there's no way i'm a homosexual!" and sure, one of the two guys also does look like a girl, but it's cute and well handled in my opinion. throughout both the show and manga kazuya stays as the guy that like, simply doesn't know gay people exist, i think. he's not inherently homophobic, i'd say. he's always genuinely shocked as if he doesn't know what just happened, almost to the point it's funny. it simply does not process in his mind and he resets.

next chapter is about girls from another school taking pictures of mitsuru with his shirt off because it's too hot? and shinobu has diarrhea. the one after that, the boys go to the pool. everyone there thinks shun is a girl (as usual) so they ask him to go into the women's dressing room, and the lifeguard gets disappointed to find out he's a guy, but their outfits are sick so it's fine.

we continue to see kazuya being the one taking care of dorm head duty since mitsuru is away for the week. reina rolls up to the dorm and he's actually way more of an annoying brat than in the anime. kazuya lowkey bullies the kid and thinks shun should be rougher with him, or something. he still kinda has that thing of being disappointed that his brother isn't tough for whatever reason.

volume 3 starts school sports festival, not a thing we see in the anime. shun is dressed up as a cheerleader, kazuya is the fastest runner alive, shinobu set up bets for each team. typical stuff. later we see a girl show up at the school because her girlfriend was going there to see someone else. every single one of the boys absolutely loses their mind at the sight of a "real lesbian" who they thought was nothing more than a myth, and then it just turns out the her girlfriend saw mitsuru dressed up as a woman as part of the festival event (which they never even showed) and she was interested. rest of the volume is mieko showing up again asking for a favor because someone is trying to assassinate her, the boys celebrating new year's, a kid trying to figure out if shinobu is evil to get into the journalism club, and the motorcycle guy getting a real girlfriend.

a thing the manga definitely does better over the anime is showing the rest of the people in the dorms. although i barely even up remembering their names, they sure are there and have their own things going on. they do become more prevalent and they're part of greenwood as a whole. i just don't particularly feel like they stand out as characters themselves? some of their stories are fine and all but they serve as a bunch of background dudes that chip in at stuff most of the time. while it is cool to see the dorms more lived in, they're also not so important that it makes them feel like they actually matter, if it make sense.

as the manga goes on it starts feeling like a bit of a bottleneck. by no means is it not entertaining, it's simply that it jumps around between stuff that doesn't feel like it amounts to a lot. probably the reason why as i continue explaining things here i go over these chapters with stuff to say about them. next is volume 4 though! so almost halfway through!

this volume shows us the woman that shinobu's older brother (because it seems he has one) was supposed to marry. i believe, she doesn't really amount to much in the story, so i won't even go into detail about her. they go into a flashback with how shinobu and mitsuru met in their first year and fought, to then end up respecting each other. it's cool.

the rest of the volume is half a dragon quest parody and the other half a ghost story. both of these do, in fact, appear in the anime. however, they do so in a different way. in the manga, the fantasy manga parody is really just that, a sort of spin off that goes for a couple chapters. in the ova, the boys at the dorms plan on filming a movie to show at the festival, which is honestly such a cooler idea. they show them going around planning and filming stuff. shinobu and mitsuru even have to go pose for the self insert manga author that uses them as reference for her next manga so they can get the outfits they need. it's a whole process of them showing how they're doing this indie movie at their own school while cutting into the actual scenes of the supposed movie, real neat stuff.

in the other chapters, they go to a hotel shun's family just acquired and stay for the night. it just so turns out it's haunted and a bunch of girls try to get the boys to become ghosts as well so they can be together. mitsuru, however, manages to exorcise them since his family runs a shrine and he simply knows how to do that (?). ironically, he's the one that needs to get an exorcism in the ova.

this episode is one of my favorites by far. the lights go dark in greenwood, just like they did in volume 1 long ago. this time, mitsuru gets haunted by a girl he doesn't know. what's funny about this is that she is just a normal, cute girl and nothing else. she hangs around, talks to them, plays games, etc. fully visible to everyone, you simply can't touch her. mitsuru gets into trouble for bringing a girl into the dorms since he's clearly not allowed to, but it's not like he can do anything about it. he gets really stressed out and consistently asks her to leave him alone (which, wow. rude). i'm almost definitely biased here but this girl is actually voiced by the same woman that does my favorite character in the trails series, so, yeah. she's just really cute and fun and doesn't really hinder his daily activities in the slightest so seeing him get really pissed off about it is entertaining. the way the episode starts is also my current favorite thing ever:

this episode perfectly encapsulates the charm that has me tied to greenwood. the music, the characters, the wacky situations that get oddly real for short spans. by the end of the episode, she reveals that there isn't any major reason for her to be haunting mitsuru besides the fact that he's good looking. she simply hadn't ever kissed anyone before dying, and she wanted to do that. he strictly refuses because he's a little baby bitch and she leaves. instead, a day later, she tricks him by picking up the cat and having him kiss it. except that she's actually not done with him because she still likes him, so she brings a bunch of other ghost girls to mess with them. really funny. again, ironic, how he's the one getting haunted this time and he can't do anything about it.

the two final episodes of the anime are the most relevant arc of the series, which won't happen until much later in the manga. so we keep moving.

volume 5 takes place around the school festival, the one they made a movie for in the ova. kazuya gets tricked into a game of ping pong to see who would get the main role for the play they're doing, while shun does also take part of a different play. basically, we get 3 of the 4 main guys to dress up as women. shun's play is lupin's castle of cagliostro, which did also happen in the anime as an extra special segment at the end of that episode and it's really neat.

the rest of the volume has a new guy show up claiming that kazuhiro isn't worthy enough to be married to sumire. this guy is just her cousin, which is also in love with her, so let's leave it there. at the end they show a flashback into how the two of them met back in college, to then get introduced into the hasukawa household. this flashback is neat overall, it gives further information on how they've been doing as a family of two brothers, and a bit of insight into both kazuhiro and sumire's relationship.

sumire has been with them since kazuya was around 14, while she was in her early 20s, which i suppose isn't too terrible for him to fall in love? it obviously wouldn't work out regardless of the circumstance, but this isn't something they actually ever try to push for or imply it could've happened. not a lot more than teenage love, you know. what is actually fun is getting the news that sumire is pregnant with a boy. it doesn't really shape the story at all, but in the large scheme of things it does try to show the shift between their relationship and kazuya's feelings, which is great to see.

volume 6 has one chapter of shinobu meeting an alien that tells him he has a specimen that looks exactly like him who recently escaped containment. shinobu shoots him and doesn't flinch at the idea of killing someone that looks exactly like him, maybe because he's more of a robot than whatever this alien made could be, but we're still stretching the logic of this manga the more we go.

following chapter is the boys playing baseball against a friend of mitsuru's, fun chapter. the dorms move on to the next year, and they do actually start their second and third year of highschool. kazuya is the one becoming the dorm head this time, either because mitsuru likes to mess with him and / or because he does genuinely respect the guy. kazuya isn't too sure himself, though. some new students show up like the kid from singapore who they keep trying to explain things to as if he's some sort of otherworldly being, and he also shows signs of being completely clueless on how stuff works like not even knowing what a school trip is. i asked someone i know if this is true and they said that people in singapore do know what a school trip is (as i assumed), but sure. the school trip does happen, where they meet mieko once again and she asks mitsuru to do some modelling for a tv ad. this becomes a whole thing with mitsuru not being sure whether or not he wants to do it because like, his brother will think that he's only doing it to attract the attention of his "real parents" because actually he feels that he's not really part of his family since he's adopted? it's weird, the adoptive part will come into place later (although it's not that big either).

in volume 7 kazuya's nephew is born and they need to take care of him because sumire was gonna give them a couple of tickets for the ice ring. in the ice ring, two girls try to trick shinobu and mitsuru into becoming their partners because they need a couple to do competitive ice skating, or something. the conclusion is shinobu saying "why doesn't one of you get a sex change?" and they think it's genius and leave it at that. hooray for surgery. there's another three side stories with an edo era spin off, the boys going into the kisaragi onsen, and the duo in the arcade room getting cursed by an evil videogame you have to beat in one go.

it doesn't end with, but midway through we got the start of the main final arc, the one with igarashi miya. miya is a girl mitsuru used to know back on his previous school, she seems to be a bit of a delinquent that got into trouble with some girls over turf conflicts. she needs a place to stay for the night and tries to get help at greenwood. kazuya insists in helping her and offering his room even if it's strictly forbidden, because he sees something in her eyes. there's a certain sadness and uncertainty he's not sure about, so he wants to know more.

she explains to kazuya about her situation, and it turns out, she's not as tough as she seems. she doesn't like that people see her as a delinquent, she's not strong, she's a bit of a scaredy cat and is always trying to keep herself from crying. in the process of helping her and getting the girls from the other school to stop annoying her, kazuya realizes that, whoops! he kind of likes her! unfortunate for him, she already has a boyfriend. she does really insist that he's a good guy since he's always been there for him. on the other hand, kazuya wonders why was it because of him that she turned into a delinquent, or why doesn't she ever feel loved by him. she feels that he doesn't like her for who she is but rather he believes he likes her because they've always been together. not a lot he can do about it though, as he doesn't really have an excuse to see her again.

the anime doesn't change much here, the episode starts with kazuya already dwelling about her as they usually do with these episodes, starting with the aftermath of the events and recapping on what happened to them. i do like this, i'll say.

volume 8 is the last one before overlapping with the final episode, so it's mostly filled with extra chapters. there's one about a boy not going to class because he hates one of the teachers, another one with mitsuru getting tailed by a girl (again) who loves the made up version of mitsuru she imagined while seeing his commercial, devilwood again with the dragon quest fantasy manga parody, and the sports festival once more. the thing i like about the sequel to the sports festival is how kazuya gets into the track team to distract himself from thinking about miya, which seems to work for a bit. not essential, but realistic.

another one of the chapters is him falling off a ladder and landing in an alternate dimension where everyone is female, which is actually kinda fun, if not a little bit short. they call it "cherrywood" instead of greenwood, and there's actually a version of this they had the voice actors record as part of the drama cds. there are a couple of these mainly for the special chapters like the sports festival and stuff, they're neat. once kazuya comes back to his world the boys in the dorm keep dropping themselves off the ladder to see if they can go there as well so it's pretty funny.

i think the girl that was obsessed with mitsuru is somewhat a different version of the ghost girl from episode 4, although this one gets so mad at so many things he does that he legitimately cannot go around doing anything without having this girl break into tears, so it's funny i'll let it slide. i insist that having mitsuru be overwhelmed by girls all the time doesn't give the vibe of the "all boys dormitory life" that most of the series tries to push forward, but only some of them wouldn't hurt too much, i suppose.

we arrive to the final volume, as well as the last episode. had you been reading and watching these alongside, you would have a decent grasp of all the activities these people have gotten involved with. the thing is that, the 6 ova episodes released some time after the manga was already finished, meaning that it's not like anyone actually expected you to go back and forth between each other. it would be impractical to do so anyway without knowing what actually gets adapted and not. i've seen people mention that the way these episodes are formatted makes it so only a fan of the original manga would be able to enjoy it, with how much time is skipped between each one. i can't really agree with this point, as it is very much structured in the normal episodic anime way, only with some details here and there that probably don't end up being super clear since they weren't addressed but don't actually hinder the overarching narrative or actual character interactions. after all, these dynamics work well enough on their own to be used in whatever situation they get in. it's not that the manga does not do this, but it often feels like they're there to fill time rather than to simply entertain. more often than not, the chapters feel disorganized, same-y and as if they don't have any major purpose to be there than simply "what if x thing happened". it happens, and it's over. probably not inherently a bad thing, i guess it's a matter of presentation after all. ironically, the manga may just feel like more targeted towards fans than the adaptation, as it really takes a long while for these relationships to grow and develop. if i get too many details, it'll get stale and won't feel like i'm really learning much until something major happens. if i just get the core elements, i can build the gaps myself. less can definitely be more. dudes will be dudes, after all.

in that regard, the episode starts with kazuya helping out at mitsuru's house. the place used to be a bigger temple, but over time the land was reduced and the place isn't what it used to be. not a big deal for them though, as they still maintain the place. it's a nice family of 4. mother, father and siblings. sho, mitsuru's younger brother is only a few weeks younger than him, as by the time they found mitsuru outside their house, it had already been a little bit since he was born.

adoption is usually treated as a careful subject matter, but i don't really think it should be. throughout the manga, mitsuru has his moments of doubting himself, his past, where he comes from and his family. he cares about them and they care about him, specially his brother, but there's always a weird air to it. since he is the older son, he would be the one to take over the shrine, which he's not really sure if he wants to do himself. his mother makes sure to tell him that he doesn't need to worry about it, he should just do whatever he wants to do. his brother misses him, but he needs to focus on himself too. sho seems to be angry at him because mitsuru mentions how he is trying to go live on his own as soon as he can. this is where we get a little bit iffy.

from what i am able to gather, mitsuru feels indebted to his family. they aren't blood related, so sure, he loves them but he knows that they had no right to take him in and they did anyway. it's not that they actually show any sign of it being a pain on them or anything, he is just a son to them. i suppose he feels bad for taking his brother's spot for the shrine, but he doesn't even need to take the place if he doesn't want to. so, in the end, "wanting to leave home as soon as possible" is kinda just a normal thing i believe. i mean sure, deep down it's probably because he doesn't want to be more of a burden, and even if he's not he still wants to make their life easier. this is fine. he makes it such a bigger deal than it should ever be, though. his brother gets pissed at him and his response is "i'm not trying to be an outsider, i am an outsider" my guy what are you saying. kazuya goes as far as to ask him if he ever thinks of his blood related parents and he says no, so what is even his deal? mitsuru wonders to himself if you can still be family even if you aren't blood related, kazuya says that it's love that matters. unfortunately this is literally where this ends and it will never be brought up again or be concluded, because miya appears in front of them. it's unfortunate that it doesn't really get any closure, i feel exploring the meaning of family, specially with kazuya's situation being a thing, could be a really cool addition to the series. nevertheless, it doesn't happen. mitsuru just says that, he feels like he has to leave home as soon as he can, his brother doesn't like this mentality, and that is it. not even the manga chooses to explore this further, that's all there is.

they bump miya and his boyfriend tenma on their way back to the dorms, kazuya still sees that expression in her face, as if she's about to cry but she's holding back. now before getting ahead of ourselves this guy isn't abusing her or anything, he is kind of just a dude. not the best dude, but a dude nonetheless. miya has been wanting to say thanks to kazuya for a while, but she never gathered the courage to go visit him and say thanks. she would go nearby the school and then run away, never sure herself of why she was doing that. this time with the opportunity right in front of her, the only thing she manages to say is "i'm sorry". inevitably, this almost kills kazuya and gets him sick for a couple of days.

"sorry" doesn't really cut it. sorry for what? she didn't do anything. kazuya decides to give her a call after his brother convinced him to. his counseling is essentially: "you shouldn't care about the other guy, focus on yourself", which is fair enough i suppose, but i think a situation like this is very much gonna depend on who you're talking about. kazuya doesn't want to ask a girl with a boyfriend out, no one wants to be the guy that steals someone else's girlfriend really. but you know, there's something going on here too, as she doesn't seem particularly happy with him either. i think this brother bonding is a good moment for the two of them, although not the most particularly touching. kazuhiro is a fun guy, he is confident and he would do anything he needs to get the girl he loves (he did, after all, get the girl his own brother loved). it does come off as a little weird piece of advice from his part, but it works in context so that's all he needs to call her. she does, however, say sorry again and hang up instantly.

"i heard hasukawa got rejected by that delinquent girl", no! he hasn't even said anything to her! so the guy decides to wait outside her school to see her. he stays for a week until he finds out she was hospitalized, they find where she's staying and she's already gone. he sends her a letter but tenma grabs it before she can read it. luck is never on his side. persistence, however, never fails. a little bit of a bizarre thing here, tenma explains how "you need a special permission from their parents to date the girls from this school" which i don't - know, if it's a real thing or not in some japanese schools and honestly i don't even feel like looking it up right now. they both leave and run away from kazuya, leaving him alone.

then, on their way home:

which is an excellent moment, although my favorite part of this is how loud the trains are it's so funny to me i can't even begin to explain. tenma is a bit of a self centered prick, he mostly shows off his nice side but he's the guy that wants things to go his way all the time, you know. he didn't particularly do anything wrong, he's just a bit of a toxic influence on miya. he's the reason she became a delinquent so maybe he would care about her more (or get scared and dump her), he's the reason why she doesn't feel loved or particularly pretty, he's the reason why she's so sheltered. having a guy like him that won't let you do the things you want, always holding your hand and trying to keep you "safe" isn't part of a healthy relationship. kazuya is the one that incites her into being herself, opening up, finding her strength and dealing with her weakness. "i'm with you", is what he replies to her once she tells him how he feels. it's about finding that person that will be there for you, the one that will always be around and, most of all, love you unconditionally.

the rest of the manga has a little bit of the aftermath and how the people at greenwood are doing. it, once more, doesn't stand out from the crowd. they're not bad chapters, they're fun. the story is already over, though. the final chapter is actually nasu drawing a bunch of reader requests she never got to do and kazuya inviting some of his friends over to show them around greenwood and work on a project (friends we have never ever seen nor have been mentioned before now, but whatever). here is greenwood in all its glory.

if you didn't care to read all of that, great. this is the tldr; greenwood is about finding that next opportunity. mainly in love, but in most things in life. the anime adaptation takes things in some fresher directions, streamlining the experience and focusing on what is important. in the span of 6 episodes we get to know these guys, what their deal is and how their relationship works and shapes who they are. some more than others, but meeting new people you care about and will be there for you when you need it (for better or for worse) is what makes us human, and what inevitably helps us grow as people. grow out of pains, grow into understanding others and what makes us who we are.

there's something special about the serenity behind it all that i can't quite put into words, hence why i didn't go into much detail. the backgrounds are often soft and share a clean palette with a watercolor texture to it that makes it feel like a never ending dream. compared to the manga in this case, nasu's art is nice and specially with the covers and colored pieces, but it does take a while for characters to particularly pop or look like themselves as they often suffer from the same face syndrome shoujo manga can be known for. color goes a long way into helping battle this. the manga does also often rely on jokes that maybe aren't as funny in the current age, so there's that too.

the music helps sell the impact of it all, with the magical orchestra that follows around the almost play like scenarios that overcome greenwood on a daily basis. as the subtitle reads "under the tree of memories", like looking back on the moments that mattered the most and shaped the future. the theme of greenwood echoing behind this feeling. some of the other songs they made for the show sell the fun of it all as well i'd strike a comparison with ocean waves considering it's the same director and the same guy doing the music, but i haven't actually seen that so there isn't anything i can mention.

in retrospect, 6 episodes isn't really a whole lot. there's 3 of them that center around some plot and then the other 3 are extra content that focus on whatever the hell they felt like. it's obviously not something for everyone, i'm not gonna come out and say this is a must watch or anything like that, only how i feel about things. stuff doesn't need to be deep, it can just be for self fulfillment. it's often the mindless things that get the most enjoyment out of me, being there to have a good time before anything else. exactly what they do here at any moment, picking out a day at random and making the most out of it. a day where any one of these bandits will get into trouble and they'll come out of it with a smile.

i could wish it was a bit longer. maybe add some of the chapters with the other boys at the dorms, add the part with kazuya's nephew and then him entering the track team and idk, maybe the one with mitsuru and his commercial to actually give an ending to his whole adoptive family thing. alas, this is what we get, and i will not complain.

had it been at a different point in my life i watched this, i probably wouldn't care as much. it speaks to a part of me i hadn't learned about years ago, and would probably only look back on fondly into the future. those things that happen and make you rethink stuff for a good while and, in turn, open your horizons. so, feeling identified with media and connecting with stuff is a bit of what we do this for, i think.

[dandyvespa]

I-Land Final Episode and Thoughts *SPOILERS! duh*

For anyone who has kept up with I-Land, I understand how emotional and nerve-wracking this episode was for them.  After developing a connection with a lot of the participants and sharing in their memories, its hard to see anyone being let go.  It has been just as much of journey for them as it was for the fans who supported them and at the end of the day, regardless of who debuts, there will be people who will be disappointed by the final results.  But please please PLEASE understand that you should not put the blame on them or even break them down just because your favorite did not make it.  All of these boys worked hard to get where they are and though it stings for those who did not make it, please support whatever flower path any of them have taken and continue to support and spread love.  With that being said, I would just like to use the rest of this post on my final thoughts on the episode and debut line.  If you are caught up with the show, please read ahead.  Thank you :)

First I would like to say that the preparations done for the final performance, the OT22 interaction and performance, the funny bits of preparing PR videos, dividing roles, and playing Truth or Dare, and the home-cooked meals sent from their parents were all just an emotional roller coaster.  I laughed and I cried.  To see those boys grow was something very special to me and to see their individual selves shine through personalities or skills were always a treat.  Having these segments were really meant to lighten the mood for the final lineup to come.  Personally, Sunghoon developed the most out of his shy exterior and his personality was so confident and funny in the pre-recorded videos.  I also thought Jay... could never escape his dark history LOL.   Also Heeseung’s brother teasing him and telling him to tell Jay he adores him was very cute.  Seeing everyone help each other with the PR videos was adorable and heart-warming (Heeseung even had a whole production team haha).  Jungwon dressed up as a sheep still sticks with me though haha.  Seeing OT22 come together also had me in tears and stitches.  It was so cute seeing them all hang out in I-land and despite how whack it was for the Grounders to never experience it, they looked so happy being with their friends and taking part in this little world even if it was for a short time. Also loved how they would easily throw others under the bus during Truth or Dare and the Questions they voted on.  The love and support their parents got and how each of them could not hold back their tears was really the icing on the cake.  No matter where these boys go, their family will always be their for them more than anything else.  Just all those moments leading up to their debut lineup really put a toll on me and it just made me feel like a proud mom

Okay the team name?  I am sooooooooooo glad its not Dragon Gee or Dee or whatever that speculated name was going around on Twitter.  Enhypen is odd but in a good way.   Its different and it will stick with time even though I still may just call them the I-Land group for now lol.  Pretty curious about what the fandom name will be too (but honestly I think I would still call myself an Eggie haha).

TXT and BTS’s presence was neat.  I wish more of the TXT member’s got to speak but having them all physically there was nice.  Though I will say it was just awkward not seeing them cheer as much.  I also felt like BTS was just bored at some points or were just glazing over when having to wait on each member getting called out.  They did have their humorous moments which was nice to see, definitely lifted the tension in the room and I’m glad they joked a bit (especially Suga losing it lol) instead of remaining completely serious.  Their advice and encouragement were all appreciated too.  Jhope being an avid viewer really showed.  Also plus points for Jungwon getting Jungkook’s attention uwu.   I still wish they could have interacted more and mentored some of them over the course of the show.  The slim TXT interactions with Heeseung such as Taehyun and Yeonjun’s reactions made me wanting more damn it.  But hey, at least we get to see them more often in the BigHit building.  I love a good family.

So the Calling performance was A M A Z I N G.  I personally thought they were so coherent as a group and made me wishing OT9.  There were some who really shine in their parts, but I think all of them stood out one or more times to me.  The dance was pretty powerful and a lot of them improved vocally.  Again, it makes me feel like a proud mom seeing them all at this point, grown and amazing.  The Into the I-Land performance also made me feel that way as well.  They all looked so good together and were pretty in sync given that they were fucking 22 of them.  The nostalgia was really hitting in me and I also teared uo like a big ass baby.  But can I just say... and let’s be real here.... Every single song on this show has been a bop and I would be thrilled to see a whole Soundtrack Album for I-Land on Spotify.  Like P L E A S E.

Now onto the debut line! I was S H O C K E D.  You can clearly tell these votes were not rigged in the slightest and this was solely based on global votes always shifting which was appreciated.  I did not see this order coming and it did turn out slightly different then my post on my preferred I-Land debut line.  So starting with number 1.... YANG FUCKING JUNGWON.   I was pleasantly surprised and I literally jumped out of my bed when I heard him place first instead of Sunoo.  This was the complete definition of people who initially slept on him finally waking.  I was soooo thrilled.  Bro really came in last by the last Producer vote and then climbed all the way to first.  Our lovely sheep garden and hidden ace, a big congrats!  

Jay also left his cursed 6th spot and got second! Again another well-deserved man who gave it his all from the beginning and was no stranger to being straightforward and a go getter.  His stubbornness and hilarity will lead this group lol.  

Jake getting third was a big shock as well.  Our icon of improvement!  To think he was always on the verge of getting placed out of the top 7 members and made it here? Also considering his benefit put him in 7th once when he literally could have been the eliminated member that episode.  UGH.  Our Aussie boy did great and seriously improved performance after performance.  

Next up.... NIKIIIIIII.  Now I’m gonna be real I thought it was gonna be K.  I never placed Niki in my debut prediction, but his Flame On performance really change everything for me.  Actually, just the whole second part of I-Land was very impactful for him.  I was always hesitant about his sportsmanship and whether he was too selfish in the first part (the constant evil-editing did not help, Mnet...), but thanks to other members, he really matured and took a greater lead in things.  I really began to fall for him when we got to see him more playful and interactive with other members.  Like I really thought he was much happier and understanding throughout the second half of the show.  So kudos to him!  

Coming in 5th place was Heeseung.  I was actually confused man.  When he was called first at this point, I just knew this global vote line up will be verrrry different.  I was still relieved that he made it and seeing him choke up, this boy who has been going at it the longest among the 9 participants at 3 years to finally debut.... Gosh I could not.  As someone who is also Heeseung biased, I was so so so happy for him.  Think we all know regardless of which place he got, the boy was destined to debut.  My Ace heart feels full ^^.  Go get him Leader!!!

Now 6th place... my Ice Prince... Sunghoon! I was actually the most nervous for him.  I saw so many people saying that Sunghoon was last in votes or was in danger because a lot of people had the mentality that given his popularity they should reserve the votes for the people who would most likely be eliminated.  I think that’s why Heeseung and Sunoo were scored low too.  Now I am also biased towards him.  I was thinking like what would I do if none of my favorite Bighit trainees (Heeseung, Jay, Sunghoon, and Jungwon) do not make it?  But when he was called to take up the last spot in global voting, I did a back flip (not really but yeah lol).  Given that Sunghoon has never gotten any brutal feedback from the Producers and has always adapted to each concept, he deserved this.  Just everything he has been through... And shifting his life from being an ice skater of 10 years to this path as an idol.... hold up let me get some damn tissues.  May he continue to break out of his shell and show his continuous charms!

Ok the producer choice for 7th place... Again did not see that coming.  Sunoo constantly ranking high in global votes only to be one of the deciding factors was another big surprise.  I have said that Sunoo’s sunshine personality would be needed, especially if the group were to do cute or youthful concepts.  His health had been concerning, but he was able to manage himself so well.  Even with powerful choreo!  He is not really one of the best dancers but he had always been able to do his part.  I really thought the Producers would choose K, but I really thought Bang PD boiled it down to overall skill and personality appeal.  He even claimed that Sunoo would connect best with the world with his joyful outlook.  I honestly could not agree more. I just people do not rail him for being picked as they should now understand he is not just some cute face and has proven that multiple times.  Sunshine Fighting! :)

The eliminated trainees were K and Daniel.  Though I thought Daniel has improved a lot, he was just outshined.  I also think at his age he should have more time spent in sharpening his skills.  What was more devastating was K.  He looked like he was obliterated.  I mean both of them were naturally sad, but K was just gone to me.  I was really hoping that he would make the debut line.  K has shown himself as a performer multiple times and was praised for his choreography skills.  He even showed to have learned from past behaviors and matured more as a person when taking the leader role.  To see him grow and understand where he went wrong.... ugh I really could not bear him looking that way.  His thoughts were all over the place and he could barely choke out what he wanted to say.  I just hope he meant what he said and actually continues to enjoy music and develop himself as a performer.  I knew how much his mom was initially livid at the idea of him becoming an idol so I hope he gets another chance at showing her that he can still do this. Now understand this does not mean you should blame Sunoo for being chosen or complain that Sunoo does not deserve it.  I already feel like he is gonna be haunted with the grim reminder that he was chosen instead and think that he doesn’t deserve this because he is not as skilled as K.  And people are gonna bandwagon hate on him... and again I say please DO NOT DO THAT.  At the end of the day, no matter how much you want OT9 or OT22, this is a survival show and these participants signed up for this.  Yes there will be fans who are disappointed, but you shouldn’t waste your anger on the other trainees who were able to succeed instead of your faves. I don’t want this moment to completely wreck K or Daniel’s chances at being an idol again.  Same goes for rest of the eliminated I-Land members.  This is definitely not the end for any of them so please go on with hope guys because I know you will still have many people’s support!  They will end up on the same stage as their colleagues one day.  

The last thing I want to say is that though this has been a tough journey and though there may be people who will not be satisfied with the debut line, everyone worked hard.  From the participants to the fans and even the Producers, all of them played a special role in making I-Land bearable and exciting to watch.  This is a big congrats to everyone who took part in the show despite having to go through many hardships.  With that being said let us continue to support the futures of the eliminated I-Land members as well as the grand success of Enhypen.  I smell 4th gen leaders :D. Welcome to the BigHit family Enhypen and may your fans, your wings, fly you even higher once you officially debut. F I G H T I N G!

Now... will you guys join in during the next season of I-Land for the next global girl group? :3

.... Ya’ll already know I am lol.

[virtuemoired]

i'm not sure if anyone has asked this already but can you do a top 5 best costumes for scott?

hi anon, i thought you’d never ask! today was a pretty rough day, so hopefully this cheers u up, anything 2 share my thoughts w the class! enjoy :’)

5. umbrellas small town boy: 9.2/10

starting off STRONG bc umbrellas!Scott was truly a sight to behold. in this picture, he is 20 years old, and all i have to say is that they don’t make ice dancers like that anymore. EVERYTHING about this look is *chef’s kiss*, from the collar right down to the carefully sewn chest pockets. scott moir woke up at the crack of DAWN to carefully roll up those sleeves to perfection, and made sure to tuck in his shirt precisely into his cottage boy pants to really sell the program. this is au naturale soft scott, only rivaled by mahler!Scott and latch!Scott WHICH WE WILL GET TO. in my humble opinion, 2008-2010 scott is peak scott, no matter what latch!Scott supremacists might have u believe. it is ONE thing to be a good ice dancer, but it is another to completely EMBODY the character of Guy Foucher and skate ur HEART out to the soundtrack “i will wait for you” over and over to tessa virtue. this costume never missed a beat, and i thank my lucky stars everyday for it.

4. latch: 9.5/10

latch!Scott is just one of those things where you can’t not include it, bc it is so ICONIC. if i’m speaking w 100% honesty, the real star of the show is his hair™️, but bc it is all about the full ~package~ we are gonna include his hair as being part of the costume. u know how v/m always say that they let their skating speak for itself? well i think that scott let his HAIR speak for itself bc when i was coming up w this list, my first thoughts were “latch scott” before i was like wait. what did latch!Scott even WEAR? for the life of me, i couldn’t remember. it was only until i googled that i realised he was wearing a blue costume (pictured). when scott said that his job was to get people to focus on tessa, he was lying bc his hair overshadowed his plans, and ended his own career. he thought he was smart wearing this unassuming blue shirt but we know ur game, moir. ur hair had more flow than dare i say tessa’s latch dress, and that’s the tea on that.

3. mahler: 9.7/10

u must be asking urself, what could possibly top latch? in which case, dear reader, u are in for a TREAT. you see, while latch!Scott had the best hair, mahler was the og soft scott. umbrellas was just the beginning, and i am so glad that mahler!Scott came through with this LEWK. i feel v strongly about the fact that we rarely ever got a chance to see scott in white with black pants, bc i personally love the pure, can-do-no-wrong vibe™️ going for him, right down to the cut at the back of his pants that NO ONE appreciates, but i do, scott moir. i do. 

2. great gig turtleneck: 9.9/10

legend has it that if you look up the definition for perfection, great gig!Scott will show up in the results. if tessa’s green dress was revelatory, black turtleneck scott is quite possibly the GREATEST thing that has EVER happened to ice dance. this is the creation by the hands of FATE, bc if their suitcases hadn’t gotten lost we would’ve NEVER had the honour of appreciating this MASTERPIECE in all its 1080p glory. it was truly divine intervention and if u look at the men’s and ice dance field now, every single skater has tried at least ONCE to accomplish even HALF of what scott did here, but NONE of them have even come CLOSE. not even scott moir HIMSELF could replicate this iconic gem, and today we send our thoughts and prayers to this work of art sculpted by the skating gods to get them on the worlds podium. truth is, turtleneck!Scott is a mirage and quite frankly i ask myself everyday if it really did happen. he would fit in at a patisserie in paris, france and no one would bat an eye. i feel like this picture deserves to be hung in the LOUVRE, so everyone can appreciate this underrated chef-d'œuvre of a costume. look, he even got me speaking in a foreign language, the POWER. don’t even get me STARTED on the hair, bc this is i-just-woke-up-and-oh-my-god-i-have-a-competition-in-5-mins scott moir hair and i am HERE! FOR! IT! he said, screw it, let me show u the greatest serpentine lift and WATCH US get onto the podium w minimal practice and DOMINATE. the BDE of it all. one of the commentators said that they had the cheapest costumes in the entire competition, and while that MAY be true this was the beginning stages of carmen!Scott and for that we should all bow down to it.

1. long time running: 10/10

tessa virtue can claim the colour green, and scott moir could OWN the black long sleeved shirt any day of the week. this was turtleneck!Scott 2.0, and i’ll gladly take what i can get. carmen!Scott walked so this look could run, and i’m so glad their last skate at the olympics was when scott was looking his absolute FINEST™️. the simplicity of it all is just too beautiful for words, but i’ll try anyway. 

this is the person u take home to meet ur parents, the kind of guy that ur grandma wants u to marry, and who all ur other boyfriends will be relentlessly compared to. take long time running!Scott and put him with tessa virtue wearing her stunning red dress, and ladies and gentlemen, you are seeing whatever greets u at the gates of ice dance HEAVEN. i fully believe that angels were sent down to bless us with this look, and scott’s hair here is really just the icing on top of cake.

scott often talks about “showing tessa off” and so everyone pays his costumes DUST, but when the commentators said “they made ice dance a little more classier”, this is EXACTLY what they meant. the whole i put this on as a sign of respect for the last skate of our careers on olympic ice energy really speaks to my SOUL, and as i previously said i am a SUCKER for a can-do-no-wrong vibe™️ so this ticks ALL my boxes. this is like the AU of moulin rouge, and it is the place i would put under the “mentally i am here” meme. i just think it’s so beautiful how, like turtleneck!Scott, we only got to see this finished look ONCE during the olympics, and then never again. but that’s okay, because this look watered my crops, fed my soul, and made me believe in true love again.

let me tell u, it was a journey to get to this look, a long time running if u must, but u know what? HE WAS WELL WORTH THE WAIT *mic drop* 

[stilitana]

so i listened to this embarassingly quickly but let’s chalk that up to the self-isolation/working from home and leave it at that

wolf 359 reactions under the cut (spoilers):

firstly, that soundtrack was so good and i’ll be listening to those piano pieces forever

this show demonstrated the eternal power of the agatha christie principle: gather a ragtag cast of characters who’ve all got beef with each other, and trap them in a small space together. cue the instant tension and inevitable weighty revelations.

i adore that amid all the drama/action, there were so many moments when the writers let the narrative breathe a little and just allowed the characters to talk to each other, and play games with one another. the word games were delicious. these were often moments of levity and good character building, but they also all moved relationships forward or revealed something new, so don’t ever let anybody say that having chill little funny moments is useless narrative fluff. these were the best moments.

empty man cometh might be my favorite. am i alone now? and memoria were also just...so good. a lot of the mini-episodes were excellent as well, especially all the character ones. variations on a theme might be my favorite of the shorts.

normally i’m impatient and skip anything i perceive as extraneous to the central narrative, and come back to it later--im so glad i didn’t, the live episode was hilarious. ashamed that i even tried to skip change of mind because i was so impatient to see what was happening, but i felt too bad so not even five minutes into the next ep, i went back and listened to it, and that was the right move...it was so good.

every single character was fantastic. every single one. they were all complex--even the less central characters had at least a moment or two where they struck a different note, showed another side of themselves. kepler was the stand out on this front for me. i didn’t care at all about the si-5 crew when they first came in--i was actually annoyed and expected to hate them all, which is a risk you run when you introduce a bunch of new, influential characters so late in a story. they made it work so well. first i came around to maxwell, then jacobi, and finally (tbh it was his swan song) i was like, okay, kepler was a great character. they made him sympathetic without trying to retcon anything to force me to pity him or think he’d been good all along or anything. cutter and pryce were less human, so their redeeming qualities came more from being interesting. i think the voice acting plays a lot into this--cutter just on paper wouldn’t be half as fun

really impressed with how this same thing played out with lovelace--she went from this sort of mythic, predeceased character, to an antagonist, and finally to being such a central character to the crew that you could hardly imagine them without her. poor writing could have easily made her kind of character unlikable. i think characters like her often get short-changed and written as one-note action hero types who crash in and upend the narrative just to give the plot steam and provide friction. instead, she’s as fully fleshed out as the main characters, and seamlessly becomes one of them.

rip plant monster...i loved you :,(

so, the antagonists were multifaceted, and so were the protags. this could have also easily been sloppy. with eiffel especially, lazy writing would have made the reveal of his backstory super cheap, out of left field, and made you feel like you never knew him at all and leave you unable to reconnect. instead of going the route where the writer for some reason thinks they have to make their plucky protag gritty, the reveal of eiffel’s backstory doesn’t change him at all--and why should it? it’s his backstory--it already happened. instead, it only forces him and minkowski to have conversations they probably needed to have anyway, and fleshes out the reason he’s even there in the first place. on this note, it’s not ultimately his backstory that eiffel has to confront within the story as a major flaw--the backstory was a mistake in the past he’s been dealing with for years by the time we meet him. i love what they chose to do instead so much more: what he had to deal with was his current, present day behavior--how he effortlessly disrespects and belittles the people closest to him without even trying. the key there is, without trying--he has to make a decision to start. (”that’s the thing about you, eiffel--you try. you try really, really hard, and then--you stop trying” that was such a good interaction...god.) i could go on and on about how this was such a satisfying tack to take but i’m trying to cut it down. glib bastards like eiffel are so often a sort of male wish-fulfillment character where they get to say whatever the fuck they want without consequence, be lazy, be careless, and still come out on top, and still seem lovable, because hey, he’s funny. eiffel doesn’t get off that easily, and he’s a much better character for it, and so are all the others, for actually demanding better for themselves, because they know they deserve it, and because they all actually care about each other, so when they confront him, he doesn’t just shrug it off--he tries. (it takes him a minute. but he tries.)

hera broke my heart a million times i love her so much. she had so many complex inner conflicts that weren’t just boiled down to some dumbass bs like “boo hoo am i human.” her personhood is a given for the sorts of conflicts she has, as far as feeling inadequate, feeling unappreciated, like an imposter or a less-valued member of the crew. her and minkowski arguing was excellent and allowed them both a chance to be childish because hey, eiffel shouldn’t have the monopoly on that.

death was a serious thing. human life was highly valued, and its loss was never made light of. not even for antagonists (kepler, hilbert) or, in the most extreme case, pryce, who eiffel chose to make a sacrifice to defeat rather than just kill her, the one principle aside from doing as little work as possible he stood his ground on the entire story. team what’s wrong with handcuffs indeed...i just really loved that the main lead was a pacifist and that this line of thinking held sway in the narrative. it was really refreshing (i don’t think it should be--there’s just a lot of bad writing out there especially when things edge into the action genre) to see this stance on nonviolent conflict resolution wherever possible, because yeah, most people have a really hard time ending another person’s life...no shit. minkowski makes that call and deals with the fallout for the rest of the show--she’s not done dealing with it by the end, it’s going to be something she takes with her. sometimes eiffel’s passivity was depicted as a weakness, but he ultimately did diffuse a lot of situations and gave other characters the space to consider their options. i do think that sometimes the narrative’s insistence on eiffel’s dual pacifism/incompetence shifted the burden of action onto minkowski and lovelace and i’m not sure how i feel about that. i think where i’d have to look is comparing how pryce and cutter are dealt with--yeah, im willing to buy that minkowski wasn’t willing to trade all of her memories so that she wouldn’t have to kill cutter. but was she the one who had to have a body count as a conscious narrative choice, or were we just determined to maintain eiffel’s status as the sort of goofy, “innocent” one? or was that something minkowski was determined to preserve--because that’d be really sad and complicated and say way more about her than it would about him.

dear listeners. i loved everything about the dear listeners. it was everything i ever wanted from aliens trope-wise.

didn’t really get the total significance of surrogates or decima virus. those were the only two things that felt sort of hasty because the stakes suddenly went from “the lives on this space station” to “life on earth as we know it.” but apocalypse averted so whatever, the aliens just want music

i am conflicted about the fucking. amnesia. memory was SO important throughout, and questions of identity and personhood, and this is the only reason that amnesia ending didn’t enrage me. if i think about it more i’m sure there will be a lot to unpack with what’s being implied here

this has gotten REALLY long so im going to stop now and finish mindlessly entering data into excel. in short: i loved it 

[smokeybrand]

Smokey brand Movie Reviews: Pack Mentality

With all the praise that Soul was getting for it’s gorgeous animation and brilliant narrative, half of which i would agree with, there were rumblings of it being the absolute favorite for the animation Oscar this year, And then a challenger appeared over on the Apple TV upstart; Wolfwalkers. It was this beautifully animated, especially considering it’s hand-drawn, a lost art in this age of Pixar and Dreamworks. After seeing a preview, i was instantly smitten. I had to see this film. I had to know if it was as great as everyone said.

The Good

Yo, this film is absolutely stunning! Seriously, it’s easily the best looking movie I've seen all year. Soul is an exceedingly close second but the fact that all of this is hand-drawn gives it that edge. I’m an Eighties kid so stuff like stop motion animation, practical effects, and hand-drawn animation will always carry more weight with me because i grew up with all of it. It’s fast becoming a lost art and I'm glad that there is a studio out there still willing to give this type of animation a shot. Like, holy sh*t, that way the Wolfwalkers see the world? are you kidding me??

I just gushed about the animation, itself, but i have to make note of the actual aesthetic. I love this type of stylized art. It reminds me of that old school, Cartoon Cartoon-esque, look. I’m talking Gendy and MacKracken. It looks like something completely different from the domination of that Cal Arts style from the past decade, a complete breath of fresh air. I love when content comes through, completely unique unto itself, but absolutely outstanding, nonetheless.

Tomm Moore is the director of this thing and writer of this thing. It’s got his stink all over it, which makes since, since he was the person who brought us The Secret of Kells. That film, too was absolutely stunning and played out like nothing else released that year. Tomm reminds be a lot of Travis Knight, the cat who runs Laika and makes all their stop-motion pictures. I adore the fact hat these studios are keeping the old styles alive while simultaneously delivering some of the best animation content out there.

I really like the plot to this flick, man. It’s kind of your run-of-the-mill, man versus nature, odd couple pairing, story but it’s told with such passion and reverence. This isn’t Pocahontas or Ferngully. y can tell the message is there but it’s definitely a distinct narrative crafted by Moore, one that he has been developing for a few years. You definitely feel that dedication in this flick and its all the better for it.

The music in this film is as much a character as anyone else. My, goodness, do these songs cue your emotions. Music and animation often go hand-in-hand, more so than live action films, so you absolutely need that soundtrack to hit in just the right way. The once created for Wolfwalkers is near perfect for the content. All of these Celtic rhythms and percussion are divinity for the ears.

As this is an Irish production, I’m nowhere near as well versed in this cast as i am with US productions, but Eva Whittaker and Honor Kneafsey are outstanding as the two leads,  Mebh Og MacTire and Robyn Goodfellowe. Their scenes together are amazing and the chemistry shared is surprisingly genuine. Sean Ban also comes through and delivers a commanding, yet, caring performance as Robyn's stubbornly overprotective father, Bill Goodfellowe and the horrifying cruel antagonist, Oliver Cromwell, is given life by Simon McBurney. Maria Doyle also makes an appearance as Mebh’s mother, Moll MacTire. It’s a limited one but has incredibly impact on the overall plot.

The pace of this movie is pretty nice. It moves smoothly, getting you where you need to be with a gentle push. There is no fat around this story so it’s pretty streamlined. That focus makes for a properly engaging watch and a rather entertaining one to boot.

The Bad

This thing is properly animated. While i think this is wonderful, it will definitely turn off older people and cats who think animation is for kids. Cartoons are for kids and they happen to be animated. This is a fantasy tale steeped in Irish folklore that just happens to be animated. It has to be animated. The way this thing pays out, there’s no way it could be live action or CG. Even so, the very fact that it is animated will limit the audience willing to give it a chance an that is a crying shame.

This thing is an exclusive to Apple TV. I don’t know anyone who has Apple TV and the fact that it’s got such a tiny platform to call home, really limits the amount of exposure this film is going to get. It’s f*cked up because it is, arguably, the best animated movie released this year. Like, i loved Soul because it spoke directly to the blackness in me but, as a film, as a creative endeavor born from pure creativity? Wolfwalkers craps all over Soul. I loved both of these films but the artist in me demands that Wolfwalkers be given the respect and exposure it so rightfully deserves. That ain’t happening on Apple TV.

The Verdict

I adore this film. Absolutely love it. Celtic mythology is my third favorite after Egyptian and Greek so seeing it brought to screen so vividly was a true experience. Celtic myth never gets the shine it deserves. I am grateful for Moore and his Cartoon Saloon are making incredible works and Wolfwalkers is another in a small but acclaimed library. Moore also brought us The Secret of the Kells and Song of the Sea, both excellent in their own right. Wolfwalkers definitely continues that pedigree with gorgeous visuals, a story filed with heart and emotion, outstanding performances, particularly form the two leads, and a brilliant vision of a world steeped in Celtic lore.

[mic-and-cheese]

1 — the incredibles & 2 — syndrome (for that big fandom thing you just rebloged!!)

001 | Send me a fandom and I will tell you my:

Favorite character: Buddy of course!

Least Favorite character: Evelyn? I don’t really hate her on any level above just, “meh, not my type,” but I’ll just say I don’t have great memories associated with her

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): I kiiiind of like Mirage x Buddy and Edna x Buddy (both platonically, but I do like the former ship somewhat romantically), Helen x Bob is nice too but that’s more so because they’re already canon. I’m not a shipper so

Character I find most attractive: hot damn

Character I would marry: Buddy

Character I would be best friends with: Also Buddy

a random thought: Good god am I glad that this is a question in this meme because earlier I was thinking about how supers were probably treated like veterans in the sense that they’re often highly respected by civilians but as individuals are often fucked over by the government who exploited them.

An unpopular opinion: hooo boy I have waaaaay too many of those. But just to keep it simple, I think that Incredibles 2 should have kept the spy soundtrack and themes of the original instead of going full superhero.

My Canon OTP: Buddy x Kannon because fuck everyone else, they’re canon

My Non-canon OTP: Don’t have one

Most Badass Character: My dude, it’s Buddy, and not even just because he’s my husband. Dude has his own fuckin custom plane, a private island, harnessed infinite energy, created AI in the 60′s, all by his mid-20′s

Most Epic Villain: See above

Pairing I am not a fan of: Anything but the pairings I mentioned earlier

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): Evelyn deserved better literally she had the potential to be just as well written as Buddy but her plan and backstory fucked everything over

Favourite Friendship: I like to imagine Buddy and Mirage had a pretty great friendship

Character I most identify with: I’ve written rants on this but long story short, Buddy is the character who helped me deal with a rejection that I had been dealing with anxiety, depression, and paranoia about for years by making me realize that I don’t have to continue to seek their approval and that distancing myself from them didn’t mean I had to forgive them.

Character I wish I could be: Mirage? Getting all the perks of being Syndrome with none of the downsides, basically. And also, she pretty

002 | Send me a ship and I will tell you:

When I started shipping them: Back in June of 2018

My thoughts: I should not be left with an open-ended question like this. Forcing myself to keep it brief because I don’t want to be up all night but I just love how much of a great fantasy this ship is for me. Tropical islands, cool planes, powers, spy motifs, the 1960′s, and it can switch between fluff and angst in almost an instant depending on whatever I want at the moment!

What makes me happy about them: I really just love the narrative the ship tells. Like, with its themes of freedom and sacrifice that begin with Buddy and Kannon, but even after their gone continues on with their kids. Poetic genius.

What makes me sad about them: They absolutely deserved what they got in the end but it still makes me saD AS HELL

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: can’t really answer that

Things I look for in fanfic: man I just want another fanfic from @/lovelyescapist214,,, I still reread the fic they wrote for me like a year back

My wishlist: Would love a fic about their family or about the period of time when Buddy and Kannon reconnect with each other after a particularly tough part of their marriage.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: who do you take me for, a multishipper?

My happily ever after for them: I mean, Buddy and Kannon dying trying to protect each other while paying for the consequences for their actions isn’t happy, but I like that ending tbh

[stevenuniversallyreviews]

Episode 93: Alone at Sea

“But why would a fish ever bite a hook?”

Something I don’t believe I’ve mentioned here before is that both of my parents are ministers. I myself am not religious (not because of trauma or anything, my folks are great), but I was raised in the Presbyterian Church by a mom and dad who often saw things through a “hey, that could be in a sermon!” lens, and that tends to rub off on a kid. Not to oversell the value of these posts, but it’s not lost on me that I ended up writing something to share with people every Sunday. I can think of worse people to emulate.

So it’s hard for someone like me not to notice that Gems take crucial steps towards becoming Crystal Gems through some pretty baptismal circumstances. I’m not saying the symbolism is intentional, because neither aquatic rituals nor the show’s crew are uniquely Christian—Rebecca Sugar, for instance, comes from a Jewish background—but we’ve yet to see a Gem fall in love with Earth without being reborn through water. Peridot first bonds with Steven in the rain. Ruby and Sapphire land on solid ground together in the rain. Pink Diamond and Pearl first realize they need to rebel as a storm brews.

And then there’s Lapis Lazuli. 

Lapis literally entered the series because Steven broke a mirror, so it’s no wonder she’s misfortune personified. Bad things happen to Lapis. Bad things happen because of Lapis. And sure enough, she might control the same waters that herald rebirth for other Gems, but she’s also consumed by them. Her old life can’t get washed away because she’s still submerged. So an episode about Steven trying to reconnect her with water is bound to be a bit more complex than a joyous scene in the rain.

Alone at Sea takes us to a dark place for Steven Universe, even compared to its preceding episode, the harrowing Monster Reunion. Plenty of bad things have happened to our characters, but for the first time since the Week of Sardonyx we must confront that one of our characters has herself intentionally done a bad thing. Not day-to-day meanness or misguided acts of loyalty to Homeworld, but something truly awful. Almost as if we’re priming for some big reveal about a core character’s moral ambiguity at the end of the season. 

This isn’t to say that Lapis, who also entered the series by stealing the ocean and battling the Crystal Gems, is a stranger to doing bad things. But there’s a gulf of difference between seeing magic antagonist stuff and the learning that she was abusive to her ex. Not many kids are gonna cause marine catastrophes, but way too many kids are gonna have to deal with abusive relationships one day, so Alone at Sea can’t help but feel more raw.

The first moments of the episode show that Lapis is more than her suffering; she’s capable of having genuine fun, especially with Steven. She hints at her deeper issues by insisting she doesn’t deserve to be treated nicely, but she’s just as quick to snort with laughter. And even after boarding the rechristened Li’l Lappy, she’s willing to give happiness a shot. While she’s uncomfortable about dipping her toe in the water, she still finds moments of joy (particularly when it comes to horns). But more often than not, this positive outlook is hindered by her crewmates.

Greg, bless him, hurts more than he helps. He introduces himself as the guy whose leg Lapis broke, his discomfort around her water powers stifles her floundering self-confidence, and he bores her to death with regular fishing. Likewise, while Steven means well, he’s overbearing in his attempts to make Lapis happy. As awkward as it is, I’m glad the show acknowledges how easy it can be to mess up when trying to cheer up a friend in the dumps. Despite Steven’s apology about pushing too hard, we don’t get an explicit lesson about paying attention to how your friends are feeling instead of steamrolling them with fun. This isn’t a criticism: it’s okay to not get explicit lessons all the time, and it’s a nice change of pace from the show’s recent string of episodes that outright tell us the moral, even though these morals are sound.

Everything comes to a head when the rudder is thrown off, veering Li’l Lappy and her namesake off course. Steven gives that apology, but Lapis reiterates that she doesn’t deserve his help, and this time we learn why: as brutal and bullying as Jasper is, in some twisted sense Lapis learned to love their toxic relationship, using it to take all her grief and rage out on Jasper. We saw a hint of her aggression in Chille Tid, but in Jennifer Paz’s best delivery of the episode, Lapis reveals that she misses Malachite. And right on cue, the opportunity to fuse with Jasper again reveals itself.

Jasper’s last lines that weren’t just shouting “YOU!” at Steven were all the way back in Jailbreak, but Kimberly Brooks is worth the wait. Her hungry correction that she was “looking for you” instead of the crew as a whole is perfect (the woman knows her way around second person pronouns), and she manages to become even scarier when she transitions from menacing to begging. All at once we see that Jasper is still monstrous, but has been changed by Lapis. Not in the way she’s saying when trying to convince Lapis to fuse again—there’s little indication that Malachite would be any healthier if she came back—but in the way this massive warrior is on her knees pleading to essentially be made a prisoner again.

From her debut, Lapis has been the most powerful being on Earth by a country mile thanks to her mastery of its most abundant resource. She effortlessly bested the Crystal Gems in Ocean Gem, and had the mental fortitude to overcome Jasper’s iron will and wrest control of Malachite. But only now, in Jasper’s pleas, does a character finally acknowledge Lapis’s power. It speaks volumes to their relationship, because it’s not just about control and manipulation: at some level, beneath all the toxicity, Jasper understands Lapis in a way others don’t. It’s not enough to make them a functional couple, but it shows that there’s an uncomfortable level of nuance even in relationships that are obviously bad. It would be much easier to write either Jasper or Lapis off as totally rotten, but Malachite wouldn’t work without a hint, however small, of real affection. 

Malachite made both Jasper and Lapis feel stronger, but they weren’t strong in the real way: they were suffering, and instead of trying to fix this problem, they each learned to like the suffering. And it might be easy to place more blame on Jasper than Lapis, because even here we see how manipulative and violent she can be, but Alone at Sea doesn’t shy away from Lapis’s complicity even when presenting her in a more heroic light. Steven doesn’t call her out on her behavior, but he doesn’t exactly correct her when she reveals how terrible she’s been.

Back in It Could’ve Been Great and Message Received, we got a taste of uncertainty in terms of Peridot’s future. Sure, a promo spoiled that she was staying with the Crystal Gems, but otherwise there was no telling whether she was a temporary addition. Lapis has the same quality, but amplified to a thrilling degree due to her rockier stance with the Crystal Gems. When I first watched Alone at Sea, I legitimately didn’t know what would happen next. Lapis was such a new and tenuous ally and had so much baggage with Jasper that it wouldn’t have shocked me if she had gone back to being Malachite, especially considering how underused Malachite ended up being. It gives the episode way higher stakes than, say, the Week of Sardonyx, where despite the turmoil you could pretty much guarantee that the Crystal Gems would come out of it okay. Lapis is fundamentally not okay, so anything could happen.

And that actual chance of returning to Jasper makes Lapis’s rejection so much more triumphant. She seems to sincerely consider Jasper’s offer, even when she sounds sickened by the prospect, but when given a true choice she’s able to see past her longing for that life. Malachite began with Jasper’s forceful “Just say yes,” and she can’t come back if Lapis says no. It might be alluring, but unlike Jasper, Lapis refuses to take the bait. 

I haven’t gushed about Aivi and Surasshu for a while, have I? I’ll be honest, a big part of that is that with the release of Steven Universe’s first soundtrack, the composers stopped releasing background tracks on the internet, and only several years later have these tracks finally popped up again. Access to their music got scarcer and scarcer, but I’m so glad that before it dried up, we got the instrumentation of this final sequence, because it’s really something.

As the clouds gather and she talks about her time fused with Jasper, we hear the buildup of Lapis’s darker theme, and the moment she reveals that she misses being Malachite, the fusion’s ominous two-note motif clangs just once. The track is soon overtaken by Jasper’s synth drum war march, with only hints of Lapis’s celesta leaking in (just like in The Return), but as Jasper begs to fuse again we get the very first quiet version Malachite’s motif (at 1:49, it’s so easy to miss); the fusion’s theme is no longer a force of nature, but a desperate plea. 

A piano rendition of Lapis’s theme drowns out Jasper as she considers her options. Strings build to the same fever pitch that we got when Lapis first agreed to dance, but they fade to a quiet conclusion as she refuses to go back to Malachite. Jasper’s drums make one last appearance as she lashes out at Steven, but Lapis’s counterattack is as musically calm as her rejection. Lapis could have gotten loud, dramatic variants of her theme for her one-two punch defending herself and then Steven, and it would have sounded awesome, but instead both big moments show that she’s shunning loudness for peace. Tying all these musical themes together is impressive enough, but that restraint ties the whole scene together.

Jasper is about to dominate the final arc of the season in a story that has nothing to do with Lapis, but everything to do with Lapis. It’s safe to say Jasper doesn’t handle their breakup well, and her collection of Corrupted Gems is less a matter of a soldier raising an army and more a jilted lover looking for acceptance after being abandoned for what’s likely the first time in her very long life. This is the first in a string of blows that knock Jasper down more than her fight with Garnet ever did: it’s one thing to lose, but it’s another to be rejected, and until Jasper learns to make a change, rejection is the only future she’s got.

Lapis goes right back to being an angsty teen after this, despite getting more comfortable around Peridot. But Alone at Sea makes me appreciate her eventual abandonment of Earth when the going gets tough again, because while it’s not the right thing to do, it makes sense that a character with massive unresolved trauma would follow the most defensive instincts possible to avoid further pain. I’m not huge on the show just saying Lapis did something awful and not following it up with much soul-searching, but she does plenty of work outside of Jasper and perhaps it’s for the best that she focused on less toxic parts of her life for self-improvement.

The big bummer of Lapis and Jasper’s story is that it never really resolves: even when Jasper halfway reforms, she and Lapis will never share a screen again, let alone have a conversation. I’m not saying I want a reconciliation, but apology is good for the soul, so I hope that someday Little Homeworld sees a moment where Lapis says she’s sorry for her part in Malachite’s agony, even if Jasper was worse.

Still, seeing Lapis refuse to re-fuse still works as a resolution to the episode, if not the arc. And she does work on her issues in other ways, even if Jasper doesn’t. But even though this is their last interaction in the series, admitting your mistakes and choosing not to repeat them is itself a noble step.

I’ve never been to this…how do you say…school?

She’s not even in the episode, but Pearl and her swim cap are the winner of this entry. Does nobody else care about their hair?

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

This is our second excellent feel-bad episode in a row. We may not ever get an acknowledgement about the abusive nature of Lars and Sadie’s relationship in Island Adventure, but at least we have this episode addressing the issue.

(Bear in mind I’m not champing at the bit for more abusive relationships in children’s media, but if you’re going to have them, I just think it’s irresponsible not to use them as an educational tool, is all.)

Top Fifteen

Steven and the Stevens

Hit the Diamond

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

The Return

Jailbreak

The Answer

Sworn to the Sword

Rose’s Scabbard

Mr. Greg

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Beach City Drift

Winter Forecast

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Ocean Gem

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Warp Tour

The Test

Future Vision

On the Run

Maximum Capacity

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Keeping It Together

We Need to Talk

Chille Tid

Cry for Help

Keystone Motel

Catch and Release

When It Rains

Back to the Barn

Steven’s Birthday

It Could’ve Been Great

Message Received

Log Date 7 15 2

Same Old World

The New Lars

Monster Reunion

Alone at Sea

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Reformed

Rising Tides, Crashing Tides

Onion Friend

Historical Friction

Friend Ship

Nightmare Hospital

Too Far

Barn Mates

Steven Floats

Drop Beat Dad

Too Short to Ride

Restaurant Wars

Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

Super Watermelon Island

Gem Drill

No Thanks!

     5. Horror Club      4. Fusion Cuisine      3. House Guest      2. Sadie’s Song      1. Island Adventure

[fandom-glazed]

music asks!

FAVORITES 1. what are your favorite bands? Lord Of The Lost, Porcupine Tree, Nightmare, Frost*, newer: Scarlet Dorn 2. what are your favorite singers? Lady Gaga, Steven Wilson, Zia, Lorde, newer: Down To Eden 3. what are your favorite albums? Thornstar by Lord Of The Lost, In Absentia by Porcupine Tree, To The Bone and Transience by Steven Wilson 4. what are your favorite songs? Six Feet Underground by Lord Of The Lost, Trains by Porcupine Tree, What I’ve Done, In The End and Numb by Linkin Park, My Demons and Ricochet by Starset, From The Flame by Leprous, Lovesongs (They Kill Me) by Cinema Bizarre, Would It Matter by Skillet, Hyperventilate, Experiments in Mass Appeal and Snowman by Frost* 5. what do you think the best popular song of the year is so far? I honestly don’t know. 6. which genres of music do you tend to like the best? Prog, Metal and any heavy stuff (not including “brutal” Death Metal - on a daily basis), Indie, Alternative, Soundtracks 7. what is the best concert you’ve ever been to? Either the Steven Wilson To The Bone Tour concert(s) in Hamburg 2018, or the Lord Of The Lost MEGA tour concert in Munich 2016 8. song of the year? My personal songs of the year (not released in 2019) at the moment: Kiss Me by Rob Vischer, While This Way by Árstíðir .2: 2019 still has to deliver! 9. album of the year? See 8.2 10. what are the best songs your parents have gotten you into? Anything by Keane, Evanescence, Depeche Mode,... 11. how did you first find out about your favorite band/singer? My own, like, nothing I inherited from my parents, favorite band was probably Cinema Bizarre and I found them through their first single being played 24/7 on Viva. 12. when/where do you first remember having heard your favorite song? I don’t remember anymore, sadly. I first heard Trains on a train station. 13. about how many times have you listened to your favorite song? I have absolutely no idea, any number I’d name would be too low. 14. if someone asks you what music they should check out, what are your go-to recommendations? I always assume my taste in music is nothing most people would care to listen to, but I’d say everyone should check out Steven Wilson(’s projects) at least once. And I’d promote my favourites in Lord Of The Lost till I die.

NOSTALGIA 15. what songs give you the most nostalgia? Anything by Evanescence, Keane, 80s music in general, The Corrs, Kylie Minogue, HIM... 16. what kinds of music were you raised on? Mostly 80s stuff, some rock, much pop, my mother brought some jazz as well, unfortunately. 17. what are your favorite songs that have ever been popular? See 15., probably :D I love almost every song by Gaga, I’d say she’s definitely popular! 18. who were your favorite musicians as a kid? I adopted my parent’s favorites, mostly The Corrs, specifically their drummer Caroline. Eisblume. Cinema Bizarre. Though that was already in my teens. 19. how did you feel about music as a kid? Music is and has always been my love and a great hobby. 20. what was your first concert? if you haven’t been to one, what do you want your first concert to be? I was six years old and I remember my dad telling me to say I’m seven so the security would let us in. It was The Corrs and I think it was either in the Hanns-Martin-Schleyer-Halle in Stuttgart, or in the Olympiahalle Munich. We went to several concerts in that year. (So that’s where I got that from!)

PERFORMANCE 21. how do live performances, whether they’re from your friends or professionals, tend to make you feel? Like in another dimension. 22. singing in the shower or singing in the car? I don’t drive, so, rather in the shower. But mostly at my desktop, extremely loudly. 23. if you were to become a musician, what kind of musician would you be? I am a pianist/multi-instrumentalist, but I think I’d never want to be a professional. 24. if you could pick one instrument to learn how to play, what would it be? If improving on the piano doesn’t count, like, learn something completely new, I’d say, maybe the harp, the cello (though I tried it some years ago). 25. what is your singing voice like? what singers do you remind yourself of? I don’t have a super special singing voice (I’m told otherwise), but I hit all the notes thanks to my trained hearing. I don’t really remind myself of someone particular, but I can make my voice sound like different singers like Scarlet Dorn, Lorde or the singer of a band, I just discovered, Trees Of Eternity. 26. have you ever been involved in any music programs? which ones and for how long? I have been member of my music school’s programme/ensemble. 27. which instruments do you know how to play? what’s your skill level? I’ve been playing the piano for 13 years, if I’d kept up the hard work I put in it until 2016, I’d be rather high-skilled, I started to play the guitar some years ago, but I was never really sufficiently active. I also began playing drums and even cello, but due to price and neighbours I couldn’t continue. I am an autodidact singer and I can play the bodhran. 28. if you took music lessons as a kid, are you glad you did? if not, do you wish you had? I am glad I took piano lessons, but I wish I had started taking guitar lessons sooner. I’d be much better by now and I also adored my teacher as a person. He kinda reminds me of my actual mentor now.

SOUNDTRACKS 29. how do you feel about video game soundtracks? I love video game soundtracks. 30. what soundtracks do you enjoy listening to the most? It changes from time to time, but at the moment I love the Mass Effect: Andromeda soundtrack and also the Dragon Age soundtracks, as well as most of the Marvel movies’, Ghibli movies’ and Game Of Thrones’. 31. which soundtracks do you think are objectively the best (or what are some that you think deserve appreciation)? I’d say check out Trevor Morris, Joe Hisaishi and Ramin Djawadi and you’re on the right scent. 32. how do you feel about musicals? I absolutely love musicals and used to visit some as often as I could with my aunt. 33. do you have any favorite composers, including classical ones? See 31, as for classical ones, I love Rachmaninov, Bach and Chopin. 34. are there any soundtracks or kinds of soundtracks that you just can’t stand? Can’t think of any at the moment. 35. what are your favorite songs/soundtracks from movies? I stared to obsess with Under Stars by AURORA from the ME: Andromeda credits, I love the Misty Mountains, The Marvel Avengers theme and the Harry Potter soundtrack, actually I can’t possibly remember everything to write it down.

LYRICS 36. what are some songs whose lyrics you relate to? Ou, that’s a personal one. There are many. But to name a few: Would It Matter by Skillet, Covered In Gold and Walls Of Utopia by Oh Fyo!, Don’t Hate Me and Prodigal by Porcupine Tree, Pariah and Hand Cannot Erase by Steven Wilson, No Me No You by Frost*, almost everything by Scarlet Dorn as well as Black Halo and most of all Cut Me Out by Lord Of The Lost 37. pick a song and analyse its lyrics. Can’t do, shouldn’t do, probably. 38. which songs do you think have the best lyrics? There’s just SO many. 39. what are some songs whose lyrics you think most people just don’t get? Six Feet Underground by Lord Of The Lost, not your typical love songTM, Harmony Korine by Steven Wilson, also so much by Steven Wilson. 40. are there any musicians whose lyrics you particularly tend to like? Steven Wilson. Next! :D 41. do you prefer songs that have good melodies or songs that have good lyrics? Good melodies, generally. But once I got hooked on by the sound I live for good lyrics.

CHALLENGES 42. name five songs you like that were released in the 90s. Join Me In Death by HIM, Walking In My Shoes by Depeche Mode, Rosier by Luna Sea, Viva Forever by Spice Girls, Enter Sandman by Metallica 43. name five songs you like that were released at least 50 years ago. I could name you some classical compositions... 44. write a parody of at least a verse of any song you’d like. Reign, reign on me, reign on me, reign on me. Reign, wash away, triangles and tears, blur all your plot and reign on me. 45. name 5 songs you can’t stand. Despacito, Despacito, Despacito,... 46. look at your country’s song charts, listen to the first unfamiliar song you can find, and share your opinion on it. I didn’t know and didn’t like any of the first eight I looked at. That’s how much I love chart music! 47. turn a song lyric into a pickup line. Until the end of night... (listen to Blood For Blood by Lord Of The Lost. I won’t explain any further.) 48. name the last 5 songs you listened to. While This Way by Árstíðir, Loreley by Lord Of The Lost, Ten Feet High by Andrea Corr, a song I mixed and mastered, Sinking Ships by Trees Of Eternity

RANDOM 49. what are your favorite album covers? In Absentia by Porcupine Tree, Thornstar by Lord Of The Lost, Hand Cannot Erase by Steven Wilson, Resist by Within Temptation, Milliontown by Frost* ... 50. any cover versions that you think are better than the original? I mostly like the cover version and the original. 51. how often do you listen to music? 24/7 52. do you collect vinyls? if so, what have been your best finds? I do have some by Lord Of The Lost and Steven Wilson. 53. if you could meet any musician you’d like, who would it be? Steven Wilson. By faaaar. 54. how do you feel about classical music? I love classical music. 55. would you ever want to have a career in music? I am, in fact, an aspiring audio engineer. 56. if you had a stage name, what would it be? My stage name for audio productions and art is nadzumi. 57. on a scale of 1 to 10, how important is music to you? 11. 58. how do you feel about rap music? Don’t like it. Only a few songs. I like Eminem. And I found the influence in Linkin Park very interesting. But I’d rather stay away. 59. what do you think the best “era” for music was? I’d say the 80s, some of the 90s and now, because there’s such a diversity, everyone will find something they can love. 60. how has music affected you as a person? I’d say I am music. (Music has affected everything.) Feel free to ask away any number if you want me to answer it in more detail!

[liz-and-the-blue-bird]

First Video Review

Am I allowed to do this for such a minor thing? Whatever, I’m gonna do it. If you somehow missed my spam (apologies, btw), here’s the video. 

I’m gonna run down the feedback I received and also a lot of thoughts of my own. 

Recommended soundtrack

So, btw, Youtube Analytics is like way more detailed than I expected. I guess this is what happens when your parent company is a massive search engine that makes money on incredibly specific targeted ads. 

I digress. 

It’s been about 24 hrs since I published the video, and it’s gotten about as many views as I’d expected (which is to say, less than fifty). Here’s the breakdown: 

33 views with 120 minutes of total watch time (audience retention of ~45%). 2 comments, both positive (thanks guys!).  Pretty much all my views came from discord, where I shared the video and asked for feedback.  All the discord views are complete watch throughs, other sources are a mixed bag, most people dropped after around 2 minutes. 

With that in mind, this video is basically unlisted on youtube, given that no one has seen it, nor will it be recommended often. 

That’s fine, I don’t really mind. I think the video deserves around maybe 100 views. Max. Seriously. 

Let’s start with feedback: 

1) Audio balance is the worst 

Yea sorry about that. I’ll be honest, when I recorded then put the music, I thought it was fine, but now that I watch it, yea the music is a bit too loud at points, and the ed cut in was way louder than my talking volume, it’s a bit of a mess.  I suspect it’s because when I’m just listening to audio, I close my eyes and focus, but on a video, I’m watching a thing so the audio gets messed up more in my head, so the parts that need to stick out need to be more emphasized. I’ll get it sorted for the next time. 

2) Text on screen is weird 

There’s a few pieces to this. First of all, the transition is just really bad. The slides in particular. @shinbec made a great point about how dated they feel. I’ll defend myself, I chose the slide transition because I thought it provide a specific energy to the video. It does, but he’s right, they feel like they’re made in powerpoint. The fade ins are less problematic, but they do lack variety. Moving forward, I’ll probably have to come up with some more interesting transitions. Especially between scenes. 

Secondly, the use of the text in general. @chuuni-p made a good point saying that the text at the beginning with the direct quotes felt weird. Yea, it kind of does. I suspect it’s a combination of the poor transition and the strange phrasing (saying “quote” “end quote” very much cuts into your mental flow of the paragraph). But he did like the quotes near the end where I didn’t directly quote. I’m a bit torn on this. I like the direct quotes and then the text because it adds a sense of proof. Like, here it is! I’m not lying! kind of thing. If that makes sense. But the transition fails to emphasize that. This is all just something I should keep in mind for future text on videos. I don’t think this is something that is going to go away, it has to get better. 

3) My voice is nice 

Hey, thanks. I like my voice, I’m glad other people like it too. 

Now then, on to my own personal criticisms. 

The video now feels far too long to me. You may recall my surprise at my recording being 8 minutes and 30 seconds long. But it makes sense. I wrote about 1300 words, and I speak at about 175 wpm (this is above average). Of course it was gonna be 8 minutes long. It would be great if it needed to be 8 minutes long. 

But it doesn’t need to be. 

The video meanders, I think. When I wrote the script, I set out to post an interesting video about how Project No Chikara actually ended up revitalizing anime, even though its shows failed, with an interesting minor point on how the theme of the first show (So Ra No Wo To) actually lines up fittingly with that premise. Yet, due to the structure of the essay, it ends up being something else.

Here’s the structure of the video: 

Intro (what is anime no chikara?)  Body 1 (What So Ra No Wo To does well)  Body 2 (What So Ra No Wo To does poorly)  Conclusion (How did Anime no Chikara end?) 

Just looking at this, you might see the issue. If you look at the topics of each paragraph, they don’t line up together. The Intro and the Conclusion are related, and the two body paragraphs are, but they aren’t technically related to each other. 

And that’s the rub. 

Essentially what I did was write a So Ra No Wo To review (6/10 btw) and then forced a structure into the intro and conclusion so that I didn’t have to title the video “So Ra No Wo To Review.” I don’t think that’s a very good strategy, and it lacks a sense of cohesion. Like seriously, you could rip out the middle two paragraphs (starting at around 1:00 and ending at about 6:50) and put the “thanks for watching” at the end of Amazing Grace and it would be cohesive. I could call that video “So Ra No Wo To, A Review on Moving Forward” and I think it would be a decent generic anime video. 

I talked with another friend about this the other day. I think I could rip Body 2 out entirely, and restructure Body 1 to be more about Anime no Chikara and the integration with So Ra No Wo To. It would require more research and less “oh btw the show did x” but it would be a more flowing and exciting viewing experience. At least I think so. 

My favorite book on writing, On Writing Well, has multiple chapters dedicated to ruthless cutting. The author mentions his distaste for adverbs because they rarely add to a description, unless you are using poor adjectives. He talks about how when he was a teacher, he’d tell his students to make their 10 page articles into 5 pagers, and once they’ve finished, ask them to make it a 4 pager. 

If you’ve paid attention to The Nerdwriter, you may know that he used to make a video every single week. To be frank, that’s an ungodly amount of production for a single man making tightly edited videos. But it speaks volumes that when he slowed production down from 4/month to 2/month in order to “focus more on each video,” his videos remained short—they did not grow longer. 

You might read all this and think I’m being kind of hard on myself for my first video. I got quite a lot of compliments, lots of people excited for where my channel is headed. (spoilers, it’s headed straight into a million kyoani videos.) 

Maybe I am hard on myself. But if you consider video essays a form of art, and I certainly do, then I should learn to color in the lines. 

[penniesforthestorm]

Overdue Album Review #82: Arctic Monkeys, ‘Tranquility Base Hotel and Casino’

Spicy Mustard Edition

The other night, I was talking with friends at a party, and someone said, “Summer’s almost over.” And I said, “Hooray!” I am far from the first person to list off the various evils of summer in New York, so I’ll spare you, but after eight years of living here, I can say with authority that it’s my least favorite time of year. (Yes, it’s even worse than February. And February here is terrible.) Even at my most curmudgeonly, however, I will concede that summer nights are often lovely-- when the soft breezes come upriver, the tourists have gone to bed, and the lights of the bridges sparkle like diamond necklaces in the dark.

Tranquility Base Hotel and Casino, the latest Arctic Monkeys album, seems tailor-made for such nights. The arrangements are lush and loungey, highlighting Alex Turner’s sumptuous croon, as the songs weave together a loose concept of decadence on an off-world colony. Blade Runner gets a direct mention in “Star Treatment”, and when I watched them performing “Four Out of Five” on Jimmy Fallon, I couldn’t help but think of the Canto Bight sequence from The Last Jedi, with its intergalactic high-rollers. And then there’s the photography of Slim Aarons-- mid-20th Century leisure at its peak: umbrella drinks and silk caftans and Modernist swimming pools...

The thing is, the album is best experienced as a ‘mood piece’-- you just have to sit back, relax, and go with it (or don’t, I guess, but let’s assume that you’re sticking around). “Kiss me underneath the moon’s sideboob”, from the album’s title track, is a ridiculous lyric. I have no idea what “warp-speed chic” is, or “the Ultracheese” (though “It stays between us, Steinway, and his sons”, from that song, is a great line). I have a perfect understanding of the album’s narrator, though: a true raconteur, raffish and disreputable, but in a charming way-- if you could get him talking, he’d have terrific stories, and the most incredible thing about them would be that they were true.

OK, but seriously, this is a music review, can you please talk about that? Well, to quote the singer himself, in “One Point Perspective”: “Bear with me, man, I lost my train of thought”. The guitar solo in that song is fantastic, for a start: a layer of fuzz making it stand out against the shimmering keyboards and liquid bass. I’m also quite a fan of the bit during the bridge of “Four Out of Five”, when Turner sings, “I can lift you up another semitone”, and the music changes key behind him. The woozy organ waltz of “The World’s First-Ever Monster Truck Front Flip”... The dark, unsettling groove of “Science Fiction” (which somehow manages to reference The Shape of Water and the concept of quantitative easing in the same verse)... Overall, the production is truly beautiful-- as rich and luscious as the subject matter deserves.

Great, now are you going to tie the summer theme back in, or just leave us hanging? Listen, I’m not great at endings. But I was glad to have this album as  a soundtrack in my head over the past few months: while having a long conversation with a friend on a sidewalk in the Lower East Side, jumping up on a stage to sing harmony on “Young Americans” with a whole pack of pals (there’s quite a bit of Bowie in this album’s DNA, now that I think about it), watching a band of teenagers from Texas on their very first tour, or just hanging out in my living room with a drink, on a night when I had the apartment to myself. I’m not saying this album would hold up to serious scrutiny (there’s a reason I don’t do these for a living), but if you’re in the right frame of mind, you’ll find yourself drifting off in its sidereal currents, dipping a hand in the Milky Way, wondering idly what a taqueria on the moon might actually look like.

[pixelgrotto]

The deductive point ‘n click escapades of a forgotten southern belle  Adventure games of the point ‘n click variety are a genre that tend to feature female protagonists more often than others. Why this is the case, I’m not entirely sure - it might have something to do with the stereotype that women are more patient, more willing to read and perhaps better at solving puzzles than men. Or, perhaps legendary adventure game designer Roberta Williams’ influence still holds strong, at least on a subconscious level in the minds of designers, over the genre that she helped nourish in the 80s and 90s, and the heroines of today’s games are merely following in the footsteps of fine women that preceded them, like Rosella of Daventry in King’s Quest IV.  Whatever the reason, despite there being quite a few point ‘n clickers popping up these days with engaging female protagonists (Kathy Rain is one that I played early this year and enjoyed), there’s a 1920s southern belle who probably deserved a long-lasting series but only got two games which are somewhat overlooked these days. Her name is Laura Bow, and she served as the protagonist of two Sierra titles that were released in 1989 and 1992 - The Colonel’s Bequest and The Dagger of Amon Ra. 

Laura seems to have been specifically patterned after famous silent film actress Clara Bow, but at her heart she’s more like a slightly older version of Nancy Drew, and her two games embody Nancy’s fine tradition of mystery solving. The Colonel’s Bequest takes place on a private island in the bayous of New Orleans as Laura accompanies a friend and fellow Tulane University student for a weekend getaway at the manor of her uncle, Colonel Dijon. The old man is bequeathing his fortune to relatives and has invited a motley assortment of characters right out of an Agatha Christie paperback - the drunk aunt, the conceited Hollywood starlet, the perverted doctor who seems to have a thing for betting on the ponies - and a la Clue, bodies start piling up as the relatives presumably begin offing themselves in order to get Dijon’s fortune first. 

I mentioned Roberta Williams previously, and The Colonel’s Bequest was actually designed by her as one of those rare side projects that didn’t feature the words “King’s” and “Quest” in the title. (Hm, I suppose it’s called The Colonel’s Bequest, so scratch that.) It’s always hard to tell how much Roberta was involved in non-King’s Quest projects - The Dagger of Amon Ra, for instance, was directed by Bruce Balfour despite featuring her name on the box - but I’d wager that she intended The Colonel’s Bequest to be a spiritual remake of her very first adventure game (and indeed, the first graphical adventure game ever), Mystery House. Mystery House featured a similar murder plot, and The Colonel’s Bequest takes this concept and evolves it, offering a unique structure where there aren’t really any puzzles to solve but instead “scenes” to witness. The entire game is structured like a play - there’s even a cast curtain call in the beginning - and Laura is encouraged to spend as much time as possible talking with the potential murder suspects and finding unique ways to eavesdrop on them. 

The game’s manual makes a huge deal about this emphasis on observing the story and slowly figuring out the links between characters in an effort to deduce the killer, and we can look at Johnny L. Wilson’s 1990 review of the game in Computer Gaming World as an example of how this approach was seen as admirable, fresh and also a bit risky at the time. Don’t let the fact that there aren’t many puzzles fool you into thinking that The Colonel’s Bequest is easy, though - it’s just as tough as Sierra’s other adventures with just as many nonsensical ways to die, and the unique structure where certain events and conversations are “timed” (indicated on screen by a clock) means that sometimes you’ll be wandering around aimlessly searching for the next thing to do, or possibly miss out on vital bits of info because you weren’t at the right place at the right time. It’s a little like The Last Express, only less refined. 

Luckily, the game’s great atmosphere makes up for any shortcomings that its boldly unorthodox but occasionally clunky design creates. This is one of the best 16 color titles that Sierra produced with their SC10 engine, and the soundtrack is packed with jazzy songs influenced by the Roaring Twenties with just enough sense to know when to be quiet as well. As you navigate Laura across the silent grounds of the mansion in the dead of night, wondering where the killer might be, it’s very possible to get shaken by the sound of lightning bursting in the background, and I can certainly imagine young players in 1989 jumping out of their skin when they encountered such moments.

Laura’s next outing, The Dagger of Amon Ra, trades the dark island setting for the Egyptology craze of the 20s, and loses a little bit in the process but makes up for it with 256 colors, rotoscoped animations (which are darn smooth but cause character sprites to be a bit muddy, unfortunately) and an even catchier selection of jazz tunes, including an amusing vocal track called “The Archaeologist Song.” Oh, and the CD version is a “talkie” game, with performances that range from kinda terrible (Sierra was still having their employees voice these games at the time instead of hiring actors) to excellent (Laura’s got a cute southern accent and the narrator’s voice is heavenly).  

The plot revolves around the titular Dagger of Amon Ra, an Egyptian artifact that’s been stolen from a New York City museum. Laura, now a fresh grad from Tulane and in the middle of her first journalism assignment at an NYC paper, has to navigate the mean streets of Manhattan, infiltrate a speakeasy and chat with a mildly racist caricature of a Chinese laundromat owner before getting into the museum, where she once again encounters a wide cast of characters, from the stuck up British twat who removed the dagger from Egypt to the nutty countess, who is possibly engaged in some mild robbery efforts around the museum when nobody’s looking. People start dying pretty soon (and their death scenes are grand - check out this poor SOB who got decapitated and stuck with a Perodactyl beak) and while the beginning section of the game outside of the museum is more like a traditional point ‘n click affair, once you’re locked inside the building after the first murder, everything becomes reminiscent of The Colonel’s Bequest. You’ve got to meander about, hope you bumble upon the right conversations and try your best to piece together clues before the murderer suddenly starts chasing you during the game’s second-to-last chapter. 

The Dagger of Amon Ra kind of stumbles in its execution of this form of gameplay more than its predecessor, because all the chapters of museum exploration feel terribly disjointed even more than walking around Colonel Dijon’s mansion did. Also, the character motivations are unclear, which is a problem in a mystery game - especially one where the entire final chapter actually involves Laura being quizzed by the coroner in an annoying game of 20 Questions as to the identity and motives of the killer! If you slip up once during this finale, you’ll get the bad ending, which involves the killer finding Laura’s apartment and GUNNING HER IN HER SLEEP, jinkies. And even if you succeed and get the good ending, which sees Laura writing her first award-winning expose on the theft and hooking up with putzy love interest Steve Dorian, it’s still quite impossible to discern the killer’s motives and why he went about his nefarious deeds, because The Dagger of Amon Ra just...doesn’t explain things. I’m not the only one who had trouble figuring it out - The Adventure Gamer blog wrote up a fantastic series of posts about this game and came to the same confused reaction as I did. 

Both Laura Bow adventures come from an older time where it was common to take notes as you went through a game, so perhaps my puzzlement at The Dagger of Amon Ra’s ending is due to my lack of pencil and paper by my side as I played. I did use walkthroughs for both games, though, and if you do end up checking them out (they’re available on GOG), I’d recommend doing the same. You probably still won’t be able to figure out why whatshisname stole that dagger, but despite their flaws, the Laura Bow games really are worth experiencing. Laura’s a likeable lead (just look at this adorable expression on her face as she stumbles upon the museum’s French skank engaged in hanky panky with the janitor) and she does a fine job of showing off the spirit of the 20s, an underrepresented period in the pantheon of electronic gaming. 

Laura never got a third game, and as far as mystery franchises go, Sierra soon passed the torch to the Gabriel Knight series, which apparently takes place in the same universe, since Gabriel visits Tulane in Sins of the Fathers and hears word of a lecture being given by “Laura Bow Dorian” - a hint that Laura married Steve Dorian and lived happily ever after! I’m glad that Ms. Bow got a nice ending even if we couldn’t see it in game form, and I’m sure that if she were a real person, she would be pleased to see spiritual successors of sorts like the aforementioned Kathy Rain following in her footsteps today. 

This is perhaps a good place to mention The Crimson Diamond, an upcoming indie game in the works by Canadian illustrator Julia Minamata. I recently played through the demo and am eagerly awaiting the full release - it’s almost like a direct sequel of The Colonel’s Bequest with an alternate universe version of Laura. Rest assured, Ms. Bow - even if your adventures aren’t as remembered these days as they should be, the example you set of the enterprising female gumshoe is alive, well and in good hands!

All box art and screenshots from Mobygames. 

[clouds-of-wings]

I finished Blood and Wine and only have side-quests left now. Man, it took me about five months to more-or-less finish this huge game and its two extensions! Granted, I only played for one or two hours a day. I waited so long to play this game that I’m basically just glad I finally got to play it at all. Still, what’s my overall opinion of it? Well, I definitely liked it but I don’t quite agree with people who think it’s the best RPG ever made. Actually, I don’t even think it’s the best Witcher game ever made (the second one deserves that prize imo). So here’s the game’s good and bad points as I see them...

The positive points about TW3 are definitely most of all how much fun it is to play, how huge and detailed the world is, how fleshed out the main characters are and the generally strong writing. The soundtrack has a lot of good music, with the title that plays in the desolate reaches of the Velen countryside being my favourite. Gwent was boring at first but got fun and addictive later. Good graphics don’t really impress me but the design of many of the monsters was plainly terrific. The Crones impressed me particularly, as did the leshen and the sirens. And many more monsters, really. I died many times because I was too busy taking screenshots. The fairytale allusions and adaptations were very cool, I love that stuff. Coming face-to-face with Red Riding Hood the bandit leader? Absolute highlight. Finding Ciri “dead” and surrounded by a group of dwarves? Nice idea.

The characters were the biggest plus for me. Geralt’s hilarious over-the-top badassery and sarcasm combined with his obvious soft spot and empathy for other “outcasts” - which, depending on his mood, can be anyone from a starving orphan to a ‘misunderstood’ monster - and moments of vulnerability is as endearing as ever. The sorceresses may all have the same body type (*cough cough* BOOBS) but character-wise the game made them much more than dei-ex-machina or exchangeable romantic options. Even bigger side characters like Dijkstra and Zoltan got a distinct personality. Even minor characters like the godlings were memorable without being overly campy (this last point sadly changed in BaW). And then of course there’s Ciri, whose character development is so central to the game and who has a blend of sweetness, boldness and insecurity that is so characteristic of very young women. If anything, she’s a bit too perfect, her flaws all too understandable. A more complicated and messy heroine would have been nice, but I’m complaining on a very high level here. Ciri is endearing and hungry for life, eager to prove herself and yet unsure of her path, and her father/daughter relationship with Geralt is a pleasure to witness.

Geralt’s outsider status was very well emphasized by the constant snide comments every random human felt entitled to make behind his back. I actually had to get used to this first. In the first couple of villages I visited, it was merely funny to me, then I slowly started to get annoyed before I finally stopped hearing the comments. Which is life-like and thus well-made. I would have wished for more clients to be openly rude to Geralt’s face, try to cheat him out of his reward, treat him like a trained dog, and so on. But the clients were... mostly alright when you talked to them directly. How about a client who flat-out refuses to meet Geralt’s gaze because they have the superstition that they’ll be jinxed if them do? A client who refers to Geralt exclusively in the third person? Just some ideas, many more variations are possible. Ask anyone who’s ever worked in customer service for inspiration.

There’s a lot to criticise too though. My main complaint would be that the game’s size often felt artificial. Yes, the world is huge, but the interactions you can have in it are repetitive. The side-quests are mostly according to the same pattern. Get contract, use witcher senses, kill monster. There are exceptions, yes, some sidequests were surprising and enjoyable, but I’d say about 4/5 weren’t really. Add to that all the random bandit camps and treasure chests that were all pretty much exactly the same and got boring very quickly. And the main story often felt like it was arbitrarily stretched at moments where a quick progression of events would have been much more satisfying. The game being huge was probably a big selling point and the team was determined to make it as big and long as possible.

Which brings me to the next point: it wasn’t hard at all. The game was far too easy on normal difficulty (there was exactly one fight that was really difficult for me and that was the one against the mage after the prison ship in Hearts of Stone sinks) and the battles pretty much consist of clicking the left mouse and q button over and over again. There isn’t much strategy involved. Maybe on higher difficulties the increased reliance on potions and oils adds more tactical challenge, but compared to games that offer a big arsenal of spells and different fighter skills - like Pillars of Eternity or all D&D-based games - TW is basically a “click left mouse until monster dies” game.

Also, there is way too much hand-holding in the game - you get told exactly where to go and what to do next, and sure, you can disable the GUI but since the game is built to rely on these hints and there’s little environmental story-telling that could show you the way, you’re pretty much lost if you do. This excessive hand-holding is extremely common in newer games but I, who started gaming in 2001, find it condescending and think it dumbs the player down and removes much of the adventure and discovery.

Plot-wise, I liked the politics and intrigue and racial conflict of the first two games better than the family story of the third, but that’s a matter of taste, not a question of quality. I missed the Scoia’tael, whom I gleefully cheered on in the first two games. The social commentary was a bit more muted in the third game, with obvious exceptions - the “Where the cat and the wolf play” quest was to my mind the best example of this in the whole game. I didn’t like the approach to romance, from what little I saw of it. It seems to be a whole lot of “Man kills monsters, woman rewards him with sex”. Real creative?! But as I said, I didn’t dive very deeply in the romance options. And I think I had sex twice in the whole game.

Generally, a very good game that, for me, didn’t quite live up to its reputation but one that I am very glad I finally got to play.

[eurosong]

Undo my ESC - semi-final 2

Hey there, folks. Last week, I published the first part of “Undo my ESC”, a look at semi-final 1 where I took the entrants and made óne change, either minor or drastic, to make the competition better in my eyes. I didn’t need to take out my time-travelling tippex too much for the generally stellar first semi-final, but semi-final 2 is a different kettle of fish altogether. There are a few songs I don’t want to change at all but must, but a lot of songs could do with changing. As always, this is just mý take on things and written light-heartedly. (Some people always unfollow the few times I publish entries relating to my opinion - to those folks, I say, skip the read.)

Norway – We could scarcely get off to a worse start for my tastes, as this unwelcome return is a composite of so many elements that make me cringe – the music, which sounds like a jingle for a new version of Supermarket Sweep; the painfully ironic title “That’s how you write a song”; the lyrics which are nigh beyond parody for their triteness; the cheesier-than-feta visuals and choreögraphy. Nothing really lit up my world in this year’s MGP, but I would have preferred the runner-up, the new Wallmann song or even (for the sake of a guaranteed belly laugh in the final) Scandilove over this abomination.

Romania – From a song being hotly tipped to one, in the death spot, which many people assume will lead to the end of Romania’s qualification streak. Personally, I increasingly enjoy this unloved song quite a lot. It has a personal poignancy and resonance with me, reminding me of conversations with friends lost to suicide or prolonged self-destruction, trying to reach out and help them see the beautiful things in this world. There’s not much I’d change – but since Voltaj were able to do well with a bilingual version, inserting some Romanian would be my little alteration.

Serbia – I was so excited to see the return of Beovizija, and it didn’t disappoint, with a very varied show including wild dances, poignant ballads and the funkiest jazz-rap I’ve heard since Digable Planets, and áll in Serbian. As is often my jinx, most of my support went to the eventual runner up, Pesma za tebe, a gorgeous bit of Balkan blues which I prefer a lot more than the Zajdi zajdi ripoff colliding with a dance mix that ended up besting it. I would send the flawless Saška Janks instead.

San Marino – Trust San Marino to veer into the world of national finals for a bit of credibility, only to make the selection process as risible as possible. I see some value in Who we are, because the combination of its rip-off of Heroes’ chorus, the robots, the dramatic with a capital D hand gestures and the rap make me laugh hysterically. But there were far better songs – Out of the twilight being very reasonably the fans’ favourite, but a bit by the numbers for me. I actually would give the nod to IROL. People say that San Marino doesn’t have enough performers to be competitive but 8 Sammarinese artists signed up to 1in360 and they eliminated all but him. Rap turns off a lot of Eurofans almost automatically, but it would have been heart-warming for a local artist to win such a mercenary NF system.

Denmark – I suppose, if for nothing else, Denmark deserve some props for consistency. How can a country that brought us such mould-busting entries as Disco-Tango, Fra Mols til Skagen and Dansevise be so consistently bland for several years? I don’t dislike Higher Ground, but it feels like an empty attempt to create a tune for a soundtrack for a hokey straight-to-video movie. I’d improve it by translating it into Old Norse.

Russia – On the one hand, I’m glad Russia stuck to their promise to Julia to bring her back for 2018. On the other hand, I disliked Flame is burning, and hate I won’t break even more (except for the hilarious “becoming a mountain” scene at the end of the music video) and so, if I had the liberty, would go back to 2017 and avoid the provocative gambit that led to her having been selected. If not, I would simply give her a song to sing in Russian as she seems rather more confident with her mother tongue.

Moldova – My word, talk about picking one of the worst songs out of a generally terrible selection. Moldova’s song this year is an infernal throwback to the darkest days of the contest. Its dirty trumpet riff pulsates like a bad headache as the most awkward ménage-à-trois partners this side of the Volga plough their way through some bizarre lyrics. I don’t want to subject myself to listening to the Melodie pentru Europa finalists again, but I’m sure I remember there being something better…

Netherlands – It says something about both this year and the artistry of Waylon that even one of my lesser favoured tracks amongst those he presented for consideration is amongst my top anyway. I’ve come to love Outlaw in ‘em as one of the few upbeat tracks that make me want to dance rather than make me deeply irritated, and I love the lyrical message of everyone finding the strength to be their own person and stand up for themselves. However, I lóve the melancholy and yet equally rousing Thanks but no thanks even more and would have picked it for ESC.

Australia – Four years after their supposedly one-off participation in the contest, and a year after they were sent into the final by the juries despite rightfully getting slated by the public vote, Australia are still here, somehow. There was word of them organising a national final, which could indeed have been an interesting show. Instead, they’ve gone with something so bland that it is nigh offensive, crowned by lyrics that are merely a string of platitudes. When Australia have such a rich musical scene, it’s a crying shame to send something so generic.

Georgia – I’m delighted that Georgia is sending its first song fully in their language, thus overshadowing the couple of lines in Georgian at the start of the hideous I’m a joker several years ago. It’s very authentic and showcases both beautiful vocals and great musicianship. My one worry is that it may seem a bit one-note to some people and fail to qualify – I might try to make a bit more contrast between the verses and chorus.

Poland – A cut-price Alexander Wallman with his cringey uncle behind him throwing shapes whilst pretending to mix, to the musical backdrop that sounds like a knockout coke advert jingle. Not really a recipe for success in my eyes, but somehow this won the Polish national contest. This is background music at best, like much of the songs in Krajowe Eliminacje this year. The only one that didn’t just bleed into those surrounding it for me was Ifi Ude’s Love is stronger; not typically my cup of tea, but a very striking composition and, in my eyes, the most likely of the entire selection to stand out.

Malta – Whilst Denmark provide a heady dose of beigeness from the north, Malta compete with them in the generic national selections stakes from the south. And how can a country where English is spoken natively alongside Maltese consistently come to the contest with criminally, almost laughably bad lyrics, like that of the winner, Taboo? I’d pick Song for dad over it – at least its lyrics were simple but earnest.

Hungary – I’ve come to really enjoy Viszlát nyár, the raw and emotional lyrics and performance and the big personalities of the lads in AWS, especially Aron and Soma trolling Wiwibloggs a few days ago! I do think there were potentially better picks, though – notably Azt mondtad and, for something also on the heavier side, Nem szól harang.

Latvia – This is a hard one. I really do love the sultry yet pensive Funny Girl and can see why Latvia were wowed by Laura’s convincing performance. It is one of my favourites this year – but I must admit to loving Madara’s Esamība even more for its delightfully ethereal feeling that never fails to send shivers down my spine.

Sweden – It’s long become a tradition for me to see a song or songs in Melodifestivalen that I wóúld have considered in my top 10 had it won, but instead it loses to something completely odious for me. Even in this pretty poor year, there were a few songs I think were a lot more interesting, like Dotter’s “Cry”, the woefully undervalued veteran Kikki’s “Osby Tennessee”, but I think my change would be for the runner up to take the winner’s place. Felix Sandman’s poignant Every single day has outperformed the ungodly Bieber-Timberlake hybrid that spawned Dance you off in the Swedish music charts, and I truly do thing it was a case of the better song being bested by the flashier show.

Montenegro – Inje was by far the best of Crna Gora’s short but sweet national selection, and I am over the moon that the country is returning to what has best served it at Eurovision and bringing back the Balkan ballad style that recent years have been sadly bereft of. There is really little I would change, but I’d want to ensure an eye-catching presentation that brings the story of the song to life as well as the music video did.

Slovenia – My initial reaction to Slovenia’s song was “hvala ne” (no thanks.) I found it really obnoxious on first (and second, third, etc) listen – I am really no fan of songs that have no real chorus. Over time, I’ve come to enjoy it as something rather different to the field, but I still would send the stirring V nebo instead.

Ukraine – I know Mélovin has many fans, but his song does little for me. It’s a low-key attempt at an anthemic song that doesn’t really get off the ground for me. That is not helped by the fact that you can (and we have!) asked a few dozen people to listen to it and because of his alien pronunciation, get a few dozen different “interpretations” of the original Mélovinese lyrics. The funky, soulful, playful, melancholy and yet still upbeat Lelja getting pipped to the selection was one of the biggest robberies of the entire year for me!

And the automatic qualifiers in this round:

France – I really do like “Mercy”. Great storytelling, musically very well produced and “Madame” has a lovely voice. The quality of France’s return to national finals, though, was such that it was not my favourite. I think the even more French flavoured efforts that were the heartbreaking, spellbinding, classic Tu me manques and Lisboa, Jerusalem were even better picks. I also loved the almost psychedelic feel of Ciao. Keep this standard up next year, mes amis !

Germany – Well done to Germany for jettisoning the absolutely torturous national final procedure they had last year, where they eliminated two people off the basis off completely unrelated covers and then we heard the same two songs performed over and over again for the rest of the night by 3 people. However, there was not a great leap in terms of quality to match. I preferred “You and I”, but Michael Schulte’s was probably the best song on the night. I fear could be easily forgettable amongst 25 other songs. My change would be to try to make the choruses a little more dynamic.

Italy – Italy hardly ever put a foot out of step at this contest, and that’s in part thanks to the grand tradition that is San Remo, which has even more prestige than ESC itself in the country. There were dozens of great songs in San Remo, but Non mi avete fatto niente, an effecting song with a very strong message, was one of the best for me. My only worry is that the frenetic, breathless pace seems to alienate some listeners – if I had to make a change (as is the premise with this conceit), I may cut one or two repetitions of the chorus and slow down the thunderous, impactful but perhaps sometimes alienating delivery of words just a tad. So those were my thoughts on how I’d change this year’s ESC if I had to make one change. I’m intrigued at what other folks would come up with in this scenario, too!

[psycho-alchemist]

Hi so first of all you seem really awesome and your blog is amazing, I always love seeing what you've reblogged on my dash. Second, I was wondering if you had any anime recommendations of like your all-time favorite animes or series you think everyone should watch? I just finished a Fullmetal Alchemist rewatch and I'd love to find some new shows to get into. Thank you!!

Oh wow thank you, that’s so sweet of you!!

Three anime everyone should watch (not including FMAB, since that’s a given and you’ve already seen it):

Steins;Gate - Not many people talk about S;G anymore, but the people who have watched it pretty much unanimously love it. It’s about a man named Okabe and his friends who discover how to send messages to the past. But in doing so, they start to change their world too much, and suddenly all of their lives are in danger. Okabe has to undo the mistakes he made to save his friends’ lives and change the world back to the way it was. It’s a really cool time travel show! From what I have seen, most people who dropped it did so because it seems to move pretty slowly at first. I actually nearly dropped it too during my first watch, but upon rewatching I noticed that there are a lot of subtle hints dropped during the “slow” episodes that something horrible and tragic is about to happen. There’s this very faint, ever-growing feeling that something isn’t right, and suddenly it’s too late to fix anything.Time travel is a very very tiny theme in media, but I love it because it’s a great opportunity for pseudo-science and angst. The helplessness a main character feels as they try to fix things in a fucked up world when no one else around him even realizes how fucked up it is? 👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽 Steins;Gate handles the angst and plot twists really well, and it also manages to avoid all the plot holes that often come with badly written time travel stories. I am usually of the mindset that if I need to wait more than 4-6 episodes for an anime to “get good,” then it’s not worth it. Steins;Gate is a very rare exception to that rule, and I think everyone should watch it!!

Barakamon - I am not a fan of children, so an anime about a misanthropic twenty-something-year-old spending a summer on a rural island with a bunch of country kids is not something I would typically even glance at. When I originally saw it on the Summer 2016 roster, I wrote it off instantly. But during the first week of the new season I had finished all my other anime, so I watched it out of pure boredom. And boy, was I FLOORED.Barakamon is a surprisingly charming and hilarious story. Handa, the main character, is relatable to the average dramatic grump like me who would prefer to stay indoors during the summer, away from the bugs and sunshine and nature in general. The children are actually realistic, unlike a lot of the children or children-passing lolis we often see in anime. They’re a tiny bit bratty and very mischievous, but it’s actually really refreshing and endearing. The situations they get themselves into are ridiculous and hilarious. And despite Handa avoiding them at first, he ends up getting very very attached to them, and them to him.I was very reluctant to like Barakamon, but the first episode completely charmed me, and every episode thereafter. The humor was rarely an overdone punchline, it was situational and felt very authentic. I still laugh a lot just thinking about some of the scenes!

Psycho Pass (season 1) - This is only regarding season 1. Don’t bother watching s2 or the movie. But Psycho Pass was a special show for me, not just because of the very fascinating world-building but because of the way it makes you think about how morality works. How do we decide what is good and what is bad? How do we determine if someone is guilty or innocent? How do we make the judgment on whether someone deserves punishment or forgiveness? Psycho Pass made me think about those questions in a way I never really had. It actually made me agree with the psychopathic villain for once, which had never happened to me beforehand. (I’m pretty black-and-white so I usually side with the good guys and hate the bad guys without questioning it.) I understood and agreed with the villain’s philosophies, and it was really intriguing to consider that anyone could become a villain if they twisted their thinking the wrong way. In addition, Psycho Pass also brings up an interesting point of what would happen if humans didn’t go through any kind of stress or hardship. It suggests that perhaps stress and trauma are...not good exactly, but perhaps essential to the human experience.In short, Psycho Pass made me think about humanity and morality in a way I never had before. Again I am only speaking for s1, since s2 and the movie fell off that trend, but s1 was a fantastic watch and perfectly fine as a standalone series.

Those are the two I recommend to everyone, regardless of what genres they prefer. Here are my other favorites: 

Haikyuu!! - If you’re a fan of sports anime, or would like to watch sports anime but don’t like the overdone sports moves, Haikyuu!! is a great watch. It’s funny, it’s inspiring, and the sports actually don’t defy the laws of physics. The characters are all very lovable and have a great dynamic.

Hunter x Hunter - If you’ve been looking for a fun action series, HxH is definitely worth it. It’s got great action and really cool storylines, and it has a fun shounen feel without being overbearingly so. It’s a pretty long one at 148 episodes, and I definitely understand how intimidating that can be, as someone who hesitates to watch even 2-cour series. But Hunter x Hunter was worth every single minute, and I cannot stress that enough. It’s so much fun to watch, the characters are so unique and interesting, and the last two arcs are Angst Central if that’s what you’re into. It’s got someone for action fans who love fluff and those who love angst, and I am so so glad I decided to watch it despite its episode count looming over my head. 

Kaichou wa Maid-sama! - If you love a good rom com, definitely check out KWMS! The animation is done in a way that brings out each of the characters’ charm and really adds to the energetic, cute feel of the show. I’ve rewatched it more times than I can count, and it never gets old!

Kimi ni Todoke - If you love rom coms but want a slow-paced romance, KnT will do that for you. It’s still really funny (first anime that made me laugh so hard I couldn’t breathe!), but the romance is slow and steady. Some people have complained that the romance is too slow, and while I won’t disagree, I think the show still did a great job showing a very shy girl slowly establishing deep relationships, both platonic and romantic, with kind people. 

Bokura wa Minna Kawaisou - Technically a rom com, but don’t expect too much romantic development! It’s more like a comedy anime with a side romantic plot. But there’s nothing wrong with that! I love the characters; they’re all super eccentric but go together perfectly. And don’t get me started on Brain Base’s gorgeous animation and the lovely soundtrack! Overall this is just a really pretty, aesthetic, feel-good fluff show. Perfect for casual laughs!

Hopefully this helps you! :) If you would like recs from one particular genre, just let me know and I’ll tell you what I like!

[marshmallowgoop]

Goop Watches: DARLING in the FRANXX, Episode 4: Flap Flap

[Listen: Part 1, Part 2]

[Episode 1] [Episode 2] [Episode 3] [Episode 5]

You know, I think I understand DARLING in the FRANXX.

The show’s absolutely filled to the brim with blatant symbolism that thinks it’s smarter than it is, and at this point, you could easily describe the whole series as “fake deep” and “pretentious.”

Me too, DARLING in the FRANXX!

But after episode 4, DARLING proves itself to be far more capable of something that I myself struggle a lot with: being fun.

Episode 4 is, quite simply, a joy to watch.

Well, for the most part, anyway.

The Bad

Mitsuru: That girl tried to devour everything I have. My blood, my flesh, and my soul… All of it! Everything was normal at first, but after a point, sh-she was out to kill me. What’s worse, she had a smile on her face! She was smiling the entire time!

There’s a lot of non-fun around the fun of “Flap Flap,” and the episode kicks right off with it. Still recovering from his horrible piloting experience with Zero Two in “Fighting Puppet,” Mitsuru opens the story by revealing what had happened in Strelizia, and his account is exactly my greatest concern for this anime: as Mitsuru tells it, Zero Two was purposely out to hurt him, and not only that, she enjoyed his suffering.

Last episode, I wrote that I am not at all comfortable with the idea of Zero Two gleefully and intentionally killing her partners; in fact, that kind of direction for her character might ruin the entire series for me just as the gratuitous fanservice and cockpit set-up did for others. As much as I love stories about becoming better people, there are some things that are just too heinous, and finding joy in murdering others is one of them. Since “Flap Flap” makes the possibility of Zero Two being a purposeful partner killer the most plausible it’s ever been, and since it does so in the first few minutes, I came into the episode with a sinking feeling. Are we really going down this route? An irredeemable lead who we’re supposed to feel for, given that her story is so focused on alienation and isolation?

Zero Two: And the rest are sure to die soon, anyway.

Things only seem to get worse as the episode progresses. When Nana and Hachi reprimand Zero Two for how she had treated Mitsuru—and even point out that she could have very well killed him with her actions—she is completely unperturbed. If it wasn’t already clear before, it’s made crystal clear here that Hiro is the only parasite from the squad whom Zero Two cares about, and she goes so far as to smile when she says that all the rest of them are doomed to die before long.

Even more, it’s debatable how much Zero Two truly shows she cares about Hiro in this scene at all. She doesn’t have to like Hiro’s friends (in fairness, the feelings do appear to be mutual), but if she cares for Hiro, she should care that his friends are important to him. To smile at the untimely deaths of your self-proclaimed darling’s lifelong companions is plain awful, no matter what reasoning Zero Two may have for being this way.

Zero Two also shows herself to be cruel in smaller ways in the episode as well, such as when she gloatingly smirks at Ichigo when she and Hiro go to deliver the final blow against the klaxosaur. I know others found this bit amusing, but this kind of behavior I can only see in a negative light. Ichigo hasn’t been unfairly nasty to Zero Two, so there’s no reason for Zero Two to be unfairly nasty towards her. We get it, Zero Two: you have what Ichigo wants. There’s no need to rub it in the poor girl’s face. Cruelty as comedy is simply not something I like to see.

On top of all this, episode 4 has some of the most uncomfortable boundary issues thus far. I’ve noted all throughout my reviews that I severely dislike Zero Two’s abuse of Hiro (and others), and “Flap Flap” only exacerbates these problems. Licking people out of the blue, getting up in their space, making them feel uneasy to be around you, and so on are not good things, and the bath scene here had me sighing hard. If the genders were reversed, and a man had walked in on a woman bathing, pushed her against the wall, and seductively touched her chest, the moment would not be gif’ed into oblivion with tags like “best guy of the season.” That man would be thought of as one of the worst men of anime and would be utterly hated.

I don’t think Zero Two has done anything unforgivable as of yet in regards to this issue, and I stress that I still like her a lot, but it’s incredibly concerning that the show plays these moments up as cute and weird and quirky rather than the disgusting violations of respect that they are, and it’s maybe even more concerning that I haven’t heard much more than a peep from fans on the matter. Just because Zero Two is a woman doesn’t make this kind of behavior okay or acceptable, and it really needs to stop being treated that way. I can only hope that the series does indeed acknowledge and discuss this problem in future episodes.

“Flap Flap” also continues eye-rolling fanservice trends for the series (there is an unreasonable amount of focus on Zero Two’s butt), and there are some concerns with repetition and redundancy as well. Hiro and Ichigo have already argued about his piloting with Zero Two, for example, just as the kids are already well aware of how bad off Mitsuru is, but more time is devoted to reiterating these ideas and information anyway. The first half of the episode thereby drags a bit, making me feel impatient and longing for the story to continue forward.

But then, perhaps the fast-paced, exciting ending feels that much sweeter as a result: I’ve been waiting for it so long that it feels so good when it finally happens.

The Good

Zero Two: Now that’s my darling!

As much as I found DARLING’s fourth episode to be concerning, and as much as I might argue it dragged and felt slow, the latter portion is a delightful whirlwind of action and emotion. I’ve said before that I could not stop smiling during the second half, and it’s true: there’s just so much charm and heart here that not even the obvious problems of the series could keep me from having a good time. This is probably the most fun I’ve had watching an anime since Kill la Kill.

And here I was thinking I’d never have that experience again!

In any case, I haven’t spoken much about music in these reviews, but I feel music deserves a special mention in episode 4, where this sense of fun is absolutely boosted by the OST. Particularly, the music after Hiro’s confession makes a huge impression. The song is so bright and bubbly, with this big band sound to it, and maybe it’s just the old marching band girl in me, but I feel that marching band excitement when I hear it. This track is a triumphant fanfare, and I know DARLING’s music has been criticized as generic, but when I got to this point in the episode, I could not stop thinking, “Dang! How often do soundtracks have sounds like these?” It was like I was back in my marching band uniform again, and I’m not sure I’ve ever had that sensation with an anime OST before. As much as the antics of the moment got me grinning, the music amplified everything. It’s just so irresistibly fun.

Similarly, the upbeat instrumental of “Torikago,” the show’s ending theme, when Hiro and Zero Two destroy the klaxosaur, is a wonderful use of music as well. There’s a sense of finality to the song because it is used in the end credits, and the spirited instrumental serves to make the moment seem epic. The music doesn’t just convey that this is a final attack—it’s also an awesome final attack. DARLING’s music choice here is a great touch and definitely had me pumped up.

Hiro: I feel myself going deeper inside you. I can’t tell where I end and where you begin anymore. But I love it!

Zero Two: I’m feeling it, too. We’re a perfect fit, huh?

I even find the euphemisms of the episode sweet!

Everybody can’t stop laughing at the, uh, unsubtlety of these kinds of statements, but I genuinely find that they add to the charm. As I once wrote about similar statements in Kill la Kill concerning its leads Ryuko and Senketsu:

…when you think about it, they could have made the little jokes and innuendo so bad. Senketsu could have been so incredibly awful to Ryuko. Being worn by her nearly all the time, we could have had scene after scene of him groping or otherwise harassing her. We could have had to endure long, nasty monologues where he’s just completely objectifying her.

But we don’t. On the whole, Senketsu is completely respectful and loving of Ryuko the whole way through, and when we do get these little moments in the show, they’re just… so sweet? They love being together! There’s none of the usual, awful, “haha, a boob got touched and she’s flustered about it” sort of situations, but rather, “I’m really glad to be with you and I feel comfortable trusting you.” And this is just… so, so, so great.

A point I wanted to make in my earlier DARLING reviews but never quite did was that I wasn’t holding my breath for DARLING in the FRANXX to be as sweet as Kill la Kill, but episode 4 proved me wrong. These lines are suggestive, yes, but not in a negative, completely distasteful way. Hiro and Zero Two are really communicating about what they feel, and just like Ryuko and Senketsu, they love being together!

Zero Two: Of course you can do this. We can do this.

Of all the ridiculously sexual things that so many teenagers are inevitably going to be watching, I would hope that they’re watching something along these lines, where there’s communication, understanding, support, and love among partners.

Kerli: Don’t know where you end and I begin

That said, I had to have a bit of a chuckle, because Hiro’s line is just about exactly quoted from Kerli’s “Chemical,” which I toootally didn’t use in a fanmix for Ryuko and Senketsu once.

And speaking of Ryuko and Senketsu, how come we can have all of this…

Ryuko: I finally get it now. I need to get naked. Putting on a Kamui means becoming one with you! It means you becoming my skin! I feel it! This is the real you, Senketsu!

Mako: The only person in the whole world a girl should reveal herself to is the one she loves the most! That’s why you [Ryuko] wear Senketsu all the time! ‘Cause you love him the most! A girl only flashes her bits to her one true love! And no one else!

Senketsu: Right now, you and I are one!

Ryuko: I know! Doesn’t this feel awesome?!

…which is only slightly less suggestive than Hiro and Zero Two’s situation, and people act like I’m nuts for not thinking of Senketsu as Ryuko’s father figure? And basically no one talks about this like, at all?

Like, c’mon, what’s going on with Hiro and Zero Two is hardly new from a work with Trigger’s name on it.

But I digress.

DARLING’s fourth episode is also a good, engaging watch because of the series’ characters. I understand that a good chunk of this post is pure criticism directed at Zero Two, but while I do have my concerns, I simultaneously think that her story has a lot of potential and could wind up being very powerful, which “Flap Flap” definitely touches on.

In the past, I’ve expressed that you could get me to pick up anything so long as it involves a “non-human character (who is a Cinnamon RollTM) who has a meaningful, positive relationship with a human.” As of episode 4, DARLING in the FRANXX almost could be said to fit into my Formula, but there’s a big drawback to DARLING’s scenario (so far as my personal tastes are concerned): Zero Two, regardless of her diet, is not a super sweet kind of character.

However, this is, of course, not necessarily a bad thing at all. While a non-human character like Senketsu is probably the kindest person from Kill la Kill and just about perfectly fits that “Cinnamon Roll” description, he’s also young, with limited life experience. Senketsu is hated and mocked and discriminated against, but at the same time, he receives—almost immediately—great amounts of love and support from Ryuko. Given that Ryuko is the only one who can understand him (or even acknowledges his sapience and sentience) for the majority of the show, it makes sense for him to value her opinion over anybody else’s. He’s not going to let what other people have to say get him down, because he knows that the person he cares about most doesn’t feel that way.

And, given that he only lives about a year, he hasn’t experienced anywhere near a lifetime of abuse, either.

In contrast, Zero Two seemingly doesn’t have any kind of support whatsoever, and given her behavior (and her sentiment about being alone her entire life), it’s unlikely that she ever has. She’s lived years and years and years being thought of as a monster, and when she’s killed so many (hopefully inadvertently), she probably has come to believe that she’s a monster herself… and she acts the part. So many people have died in front of Zero Two that she’s hardened herself. If she let every death greatly affect her, and if she let everyone’s harsh judgment deter her, she wouldn’t be able to carry on and fight. It’s reasonable at this point to hypothesize that her cold attitude and cruel smiles are something of a defense mechanism: if she acts like she doesn’t care, then she won’t get hurt.

Episode 4 strikes me as a big episode for Zero Two in this way, because this is the episode wherein viewers see her at her most vulnerable. She seems to come close to crying on more than one occasion, and she also blushes for the first time (which I had hoped would be a blue blush, considering how she’s highly implied to be the blue-blooded and red-skinned girl from the show’s opening moments, but hey). There’s also a huge emphasis placed on how being thought of as a monster affects her in the episode, as there’s the implication that a lot of Zero Two’s attraction towards Hiro is that he doesn’t see her in such a light. When presented with the idea that Hiro does think of her that way after all, Zero Two is seemingly devastated. There’s the sense of, “He wasn’t frightened by my horns, and I thought he was different, but in the end, he’s just the same as everyone else.”

A part of me couldn’t help but wonder throughout episode 4 if Zero Two weren’t simply using Hiro for some goal that I can’t yet understand, but there’s just too much that’s genuine about Hiro and Zero Two’s relationship so far for me to truly believe that this is the case. Zero Two’s cruelty comes off as an act that falls apart around Hiro; while she’ll smile coolly and act mean towards anyone else, with him, she has real moments of tenderness, such as their escape to overlook the city last episode and her heartfelt goodbye to him this episode. I was especially taken by her insistence that Hiro tell her that he wants to ride in Strelizia again in “Flap Flap,” because this communicates to me that nobody has ever wanted to ride with her a second time so much. Zero Two absolutely cherishes Hiro’s sentiment, and she asks him to repeat himself almost as a way of cementing his wishes as something that’s truly real. Finally, after being alone so long, Zero Two has someone who cares for her.

If you were to ask me, I would say that this is Zero Two’s goal and motivation. I had to wonder what she was fighting for in the beginning; everyone seems to detest her and think her terrible, so why in the world would she keep getting into Strelizia to help anyone, especially at the potential cost of her own life? While Hiro states time and time again that he feels life isn’t worth living if he can’t be a parasite, Zero Two doesn’t seem to share this mindset. As she says in the opening narration, she finds the way of life of the Jian to be beautiful, and—as I see it—she wants something just like that. She wants a partner and someone who loves her more than she wants anything else. The reason she keeps fighting is because she keeps hoping that someday, she will find a person who can work with her and who won’t see her as a monster.

And in all actuality, Hiro changes his tune this episode, too. He’s not really interested in piloting a FRANXX; he just wants a connection himself. This line likely resonates so much with Zero Two (and convinces her to break the rules and run back to Hiro) because she herself feels the same way. As she said in episode 1, she and Hiro are the same.

Hiro: I even dragged my partner down with me.

On this vein, it’s interesting to note that Zero Two only asserts that she and Hiro are “just like” one another in the first episode after Hiro describes what happened with Naomi. Hiro put a terrible fate upon his partner—and Naomi even cries as she despairs at being his partner of all people she could have been partnered with—and Zero Two knows this feeling all too well. Though she doesn’t particularly show it, I feel she has the same concerns that Hiro expresses in episode 4: she’s scared and doesn’t want to be the death of yet another partner. Like Hiro, she wants something to finally work out.

Zero Two: Don’t touch me!

As one last character note for Zero Two this episode, I was struck by her intense reaction to being touched by one of her “escorts” without her permission. The “camera” focuses on the escort’s hand curling around Zero Two’s shoulder, there’s a close-up on her eye, and then he’s thrown across the room as she tells him, “Don’t touch me!”

Hiro: You can’t! You’re hurt!

Zero Two: Out of my way!

The moment is very reminiscent to another from episode 1. When Hiro tries to convince Zero Two not to pilot alone, he grabs her arm—and she reacts so strongly that she slaps his face hard enough to wound him for the remainder of the episode. In the English dub, she even says, “Get off me!”

These kinds of reactions, combined with how Zero Two has a complete lack of respect for other peoples’ boundaries, leads me to believe that something has happened to her in her past. I might be expecting too much from the show, but I could see it that Zero Two does what she does because it’s her way of asserting control in a life where she hasn’t had much of any. While any potential bad experiences she might have had don’t excuse her repeating the behavior onto others, the issue could very well be explored thoughtfully and respectfully by the series. Just because Zero Two has a hard past doesn’t make it okay to treat other people in ways that she herself detests, and to see her grapple with this would be a powerful way of addressing the issue of her abuse in a medium where that kind of abuse is all too often laughed off and brushed aside.

In regards to Zero Two, episode 4 is probably the most multi-faceted look at her character that viewers have seen thus far. Something about her doesn’t make sense; she can come off as heartless and villainous in one moment, but in the next, she’s vulnerable and, as Hiro puts it, just like anyone else. The way that Hiro seems so torn between Zero Two’s monstrous and sweet sides this episode strikes me as compelling and engaging. He doesn’t know the truth, but he leans the same way I do: the real Zero Two is that girl who longs for the same love that everyone longs for, and he’s determined to be with that girl. Even if he’s scared, and even if he fears he’ll drag Zero Two down as he did Naomi, Hiro truly steps up this episode to get what he wants. His confession is both endearing and sweet in its honesty, and the fact that Zero Two thinks the same makes the whole scene—and this couple—just a joy to watch all throughout the latter portion of the episode. To see a big rule-follower like Hiro break the rules because he’s coming to love and respect himself enough to fight for what he desires is fantastic. What a sweet sentiment and message!

Other characters also easily keep my interest this episode as well. Ichigo comes off as particularly likable; she readily admits her shortcomings to the team, she gives a great pep talk, and she hears Hiro out, understands his perspective, and allows him to do what he thinks will make him happy.

Even better, it makes her happy, too. The fact that Ichigo is so pleased to see Hiro piloting Strelizia is such a good moment for her, because it truly shows that she sincerely cares about Hiro. This isn’t just a jealous, petty girl, and that makes her (yes, tired) story all the more tolerable. She’s not an unbearably terrible third corner in a love triangle—she’s much more than that.

On another side of the spectrum, Mitsuru continues to catch my interest. He’s a bit of an awful person and not likeable in the way that Ichigo is, but his awfulness is compelling in its own way. I noted last episode that I see him as the kind of person who would give up the moment something isn’t going as he pleases, since he seems to view nothing as more pathetic than continuing with a fruitless endeavor.

However, this episode, it’s made clear that while Mitsuru would probably look upon himself from an outsider perspective and think that he ought to stop trying, he’s unable to see himself in such a way. Probably to justify his continued efforts to pilot, he insists that his obvious and apparent suffering is nothing, refuses anyone’s help, and appears to be completely unable to see himself as the problem. Everyone else is at fault, not him. I said last time that I suspect he thinks himself pathetic for waiting on his parents who would never come for him, but with this episode, it’s more likely that he sees his parents as the pathetic ones.

[Flower image from Jwchew1 here.]

Mitsuru also continues to treat Ikuno horribly, and when she leads him to their FRANXX, there’s a shot of flowers in a vase that are given too much focus to be there for no reason. Given that the flowers look as though they might be flowers from a plant of the chlorophyum genus, of which Mitsuru and Ikuno’s FRANXX takes its name, and given that the flowers are situated in darkness, I take this as a not-so-subtle representation of how Ikuno and Mitsuru cannot bloom as partners. Just as flowers can’t thrive in darkness, neither can Mitsuru and Ikuno, who don’t communicate well with each other and don’t seem to match.

Ikuno herself also stands out more in this episode, because it could be argued that the series hints she has feelings for Ichigo here. I got this impression when Ikuno blushes at Ichigo’s support early in the episode, but PhenomSage’s episode 4 review pointed out something I hadn’t considered: Ikuno is only able to pilot with Mitsuru when she touches her shoulder where Ichigo had. Mitsuru might not care for her, but the thought that Ichigo does is enough to allow Ikuno to connect.

From my episode 1 review, it’s probably clear that the idea of Ikuno having feelings for Ichigo is something I am very much in support of, and this development also interests me because it has such potential to further the themes of the series in a wonderful way. Last time, I spoke an awful lot about rebellion, noting that Hiro is rewarded when he rebels and punished when he follows the rules, which of course points to the idea that the system is flawed and it is breaking away from this system that brings happiness. “Flap Flap” follows the trend; Hiro defies authority and is able to follow his dream of riding Strelizia with Zero Two again.

What makes Hiro’s dream so notable in regards to Ikuno and Ichigo, though, is that this dream is one based purely out of choice. Nobody paired Hiro and Zero Two together—in fact, there’s a constant effort to keep them apart—and the two find joy and contentment in their personal choice to be partners. In the same way, I wonder if Ikuno and Ichigo can find happiness in being together. Ikuno was paired with Mitsuru by people other than her, just as Ichigo was paired with Goro, and both are seemingly unsatisfied in their pairings. Perhaps by breaking the rules and piloting a FRANXX their own way, both Ikuno and Ichigo can find the same kind of satisfaction that Hiro and Zero Two do in “Flap Flap.”

More on rebellion, I am still anticipating a “main plot” wherein Hiro and Zero Two escape from the Plantation and make their own way, which makes all the “team” talk in this episode more affecting. If Hiro and Zero Two deflect, and they have to battle Hiro’s old squad as a result, it will sting a lot more after Hiro’s declaration that he’s part of the team and the squad’s similar sentiments that they need to rely on one another.

In terms of visuals, DARLING continues to impress. The letterboxing makes another appearance, and for the first time since episode 1, the effect happens twice: when Zero Two says her goodbyes to Hiro, and when the two pilot Strelizia together. At this point, every letterboxed sequence seems to feature Hiro and Zero Two in some way—even the first one detailing the Jian, as the parasite beside Zero Two is presumably Hiro—which emphasizes the series’ sense of focus. Just as Kill la Kill purposely saves its best animation for the moments that truly matter, DARLING in the FRANXX utilizes different and stylish compositions for the times it wants you to remember. It’s hard to forget Hiro and Zero Two meeting at the lake or overlooking the city or saying goodbye, and that’s because the show doesn’t want you to forget.

Something else that caught my eye this episode is Hiro’s flashbacks. In episode 2, I noted that his flashbacks surrounding Zero Two’s dying partner are fragmented, and in episode 3, I said that this likely represents how Hiro doesn’t want to accept the partner-killing rumor as true. However, when Hiro thinks on the man again in episode 4, the scene is in full. Hiro accepts what he saw and accepts the possibility of Zero Two’s nefarious nature, and he grapples with these concerns for the first time in the series so far. No matter how much Hiro wants to believe in the good he sees in Zero Two, he can’t deny the stories about her any longer. The depiction of his flashbacks without any fragmentation helps convey this idea effectively, without any telling or words needed.

Similarly, while I criticized Ichigo and Hiro’s conversation near the start of the episode as redundant, it is visually quite nice. The space between them, complete with a barrier, does well in communicating how these two do not see eye to eye.

However, when Ichigo accepts Hiro’s perspective, she crosses the space between them, which I take as a representation of how she’s truly making an effort to understand and respect him and his wishes (something he perhaps does not reciprocate for her). Given that this conversation could have been composed of simple shot reverse shots, effort like this is much appreciated to give these otherwise bland scenes some real life.

The moment is even more interesting when taken in the context of Zero Two’s conversation with Nana and Hachi in the elevator, a scene that occurs immediately after. Like Hiro and Ichigo, Zero Two is also situated far away from her supervisors, but unlike Ichigo, neither Nana nor Hachi make any effort to try to understand Zero Two or her perspective. There is no movement to get closer and no effort to break barriers.

Zero Two: I feel like I’m gonna suffocate in here.

Zero Two: I wanna leave. I feel like I’m gonna suffocate in here.

The elevator scene also is of note because of its connection to a similar scene in episode 2. Both times, Zero Two is shown going down, and both times, she notes that she feels as though she’s suffocating in the Plantation. Given that I’m highly convinced that Zero Two is not going to live through the series, I wonder if this is an ominous foreshadowing of how she is going to “get out”… but in the form of her own death.

On a happier note, one of my favorite images from the episode is when Hiro and Zero Two run together to Strelizia. Hiro has been shown running alone every episode since 2, and Zero Two is shown running alone in the ending sequence, so to see them run together, with their movements perfectly matched, is incredibly sweet. The message is clear: they don’t have to be alone anymore, and together, they can fly.

Another great image from this moment is that of Hiro and Zero Two’s hands held together. Hiro has a habit of clenching his fist (and mind you that these are only some examples)…

…and right before Hiro and Zero Two run to Strelizia, there’s a moment where it looks like another dramatic fist clenching...

…but Zero Two takes his hand.

And the two of them continue to hold on to each other’s hands even when there’s really no reason to, which comes off as both humorous and endearing—and extremely cute.

The small details of the episode are nice as always, too. It’s a good touch for the bath water in the Plantation to be a murky yellow color---unlike the blue of the sky and the ocean, and more like the city Zero Two describes as “lifeless.”

Similarly, the shot of the ball against the sky ceiling is a small but powerful moment that also represents the trapped nature of the Plantation and the children’s lives.

There are images here that I don’t quite understand as well; when Zero Two confronts Hiro in the bath, there’s a shot of her horns that matches with a shot in the opening sequence. The significance of this is yet to be stated, but it certainly catches my eye, just as the repeated image of blood raining down on Strelizia does. I’m not sure if this blood is supposed to be cleansing or ominous, but it’s definitely an evocative bit of imagery that I’m curious to see furthered.

Ichigo: And he isn’t the only one staring death in the face.

On a (bit of a) lighter note, something I found amusing is that after Ichigo says Hiro “isn’t the only one staring death in the face” during her pep talk, Futoshi effectively stares death in the face himself, gazing down at the corpse of his ice cream, as all that remains of it is the stick.

Symbolism-wise, and more related to this death imagery, the episode ends ominously. With the description of “double-edged wings that will someday destroy [Hiro],” and with Hiro’s exhausted state after riding with Zero Two, and with Hiro’s mention that he can only ride one more time with her, there’s the implication that Zero Two hurts even him. Perhaps the message is that the two need even more freedom than Strelizia provides to be truly happy together, as this “flight” is still under the orders of people who don’t have their best interests at heart. If Zero Two is harming Hiro—and hopefully inadvertently, of course—I wonder what her reaction will be to his injuries, especially since she gives off the impression that she’ll protect Hiro while the rest of his squad is doomed to die. What if she can’t protect Hiro from herself? Will she show more of her vulnerable side?

[Check out this chapter of the official 4koma, DARLING in the FRANKISS!, here.]

DARLING in the FRANXX continues to be a bit of a baffling experience, because even four episodes in, I’m not sure which direction it’s going. However, episode 4 is largely a fun ride, and the series definitely still has my interest.