#i swear to god people need to get smarter before i lose my cool
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nartml · 7 months ago
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"Hey, I think this beef was planted to distract us from Rafah—"
Shut up.
Oh my god, for one, are you incapable of doing both? Are you fucking incapable of paying attention to two different matters?
Which are both serious. Not equally so, obviously, but this isn't just a silly, superficial "ha ha, I slept with your girl" beef.
Kendrick is not only making everyone take notice of things the community has been saying for a long ass time, he's also talking about the industry as a whole as well.
Two, this situation has been a month and a half in the making. It did not start this weekend.
Three, this is hip-hop. Do you know anything about hip-hop and its culture?
And four... Really? Really now? Do you not see how what you're suggesting is ever so slightly 🤏... what's the correct word here...racist?
And listen, I'm a white bitch. So if it's not my place to point this stuff out, let me know, and I'll take it down.
I just find the whole ordeal baffling.
I know it's difficult to believe, and I'm not being ironic about this, but not everything is puppeteered by the government.
Not everything is a conspiracy or a ploy, a ruse or a trick masterminded by the "higher-ups".
Yes, a lot of shit could be.
But I genuinely think we're overestimating them.
Both about how 'clever' they are and about how much they care what we, the lowly peasants, think.
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hannahsmusings · 1 year ago
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Renee
*I wanted to smile at his ‘swearing like a sailor’ bit, him obviously having a good sense of humor and it made my heart happy but I kept my face neutral, having learned to smile on the inside and not outwardly a long time ago, nodding a bit* Well, there’s a fine line for everything… but promise you won’t get fired over having a dirty mouth. *I immediately regretted the words as soon as they were leaving my mouth, hating the innuendo that was laced into the sentence, not wanting him to think I was flirting by any means, keeping my head down and refusing to meet his eyes, focusing on my email inbox on my phone, hating that being in his presence made me lose that rigid control I had of everything, him making me feel comfortable and free to say whatever I wanted and that just told me he was bad bad news* *I thought I had won this made up game that I was creating in my mind, I thought that he’d just be quiet and agree with me like everyone else and just make my smoothie, my head turning up slowly to meet his eyes with a confused glare as he speaks to me like that, part of me wanting to reprimand him for speaking so directly and rudely, the other part of me feeling hot and bothered by his lack of intimidation of me, he was sticking up for himself and that was so sexy, not seeing much of that in people anymore and god damn it it was attractive* It’s not my job to communicate with you. That’s my assistant’s job. No one ever asked you to be a mind reader. Like I just said, when she gets here, she will give you the schedule and you will have all the information you need, including her phone number so you can ask her all the questions your little heart desires. I’m too busy to be at your beck and call every time you don’t know where a knife is. *I stare him down, my jaw hardened and my glare icy, hating and loving this power imbalance I was feeling, it felt like some sick form of foreplay, my heart and head and vagina all at war with one another* *I wanted to walk away but I needed to stand my ground, he wasn’t going to talk to me like that in my own house without remembering who he was dealing with* Can you make my smoothie so I can be on my way, please? I have things to do. 
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*cocks a brow at your words, about to make a joke about your innuendo ease the tension before you were glaring at me, stomach suddenly in knots and a shudder running through me, feeling the temperature in the room dropped a few degrees at the iciness in your tone, you looking fucking gorgeous when you snapped at me and unsure if it was the thrill of being slightly scared by you* *you really put me in my place, cocking a brow at your quick tongue, you having snapped back so brutally I was reeling for a moment, finally seeing the side to you that your staff had talked about and honestly a little impressed, knowing I could easily snap back and engage in this heated back and forth but I had to be smarter if I wanted to keep this job, knowing you were just itching to find an excuse to get rid of me* Okay. *says matter of factly, knowing you probably wanted me to react but instead I took a breath and remained cool calm and collected, going back to chopping your fruit* Understood. *you wanted to be cold and unfeeling, I’d give you that, offering you a polite and distant smile before looking away, needing to fight the urge to engage with you, ignoring the fire in my chest at your feistiness, you being like a caged animal it was so clear you were on the defensive all the time* I can bring the smoothie to your gym when it’s done. *says without looking at you, giving you an out to walk away in this situation*
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rickriordanfandam · 4 years ago
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opinions on riordanverse ; my edition
a lot of people have been doing this so i decided why not right. probably gna lose some followers or smth but anyways. pls respect my opinions! if u disagree, thats fine, but please be polite. unless any of my opinions strikes u as morally wrong then pls point it out to me respectfully. thanks!
- i actually liked drew. im so sorry to everyone who hates her but full offence, why. think about it this way ok, first of all drew became hc because silena died. silena was the traitor, the one who betrayed chb, yet after she died campers celebrated her as a hero? and then drew suddenly has to replace her and live up to idk that legacy she left behind,, when all of a sudden this girl named piper swoops in and takes her place. idk abt u but i wld be salty abt that too. not only that, but as an asian, the chances of drew having faced racism/bullying as a child is pretty high (she studies at brooklyn academy). which means that when she finds out shes a demigod, and arrives at chb where most of the campers are white (this is an assumption btw), she’d obviously be scared of being bullied for her skin color right?? so the first thing she wld do before the campers get to bully her is to bully them before they can do so. (sentence structure here is wack i apologize) ofc this might not even have happened, drew could have had a perfect childhood && was a b1tch for no reason, BUT EVEN THEN HER ROLE AS A BULLY WAS PRETTY VITAL BECAUSE THAT FURTHER SHOWED THE CONTRAST BETWEEN HER AND PIPER,, HIGHLIGHTING PIPER AS A HERO//GOOD CHARACTER,, AND THEREFORE MAKING READERS LIKE PIPER MORE. anyway stop hating on drew please. ALSO WHY IS THIS SO LONGA SDFJHG
- jason isnt bland, the fandom just kinda erased his backstory (thanks to @pjohoo-memes for the phrasing lol)
- reynabeth wouldnt have lasted/would have broken up several times. idk i just see them as two extremely powerful characters who have firm opinions and will definitely clash at some point. in a platonic relationship,, i can see them as really good friends but as lovers? idk i just think theyll break up
- PIPABETH
- i dont really like jercy,, i see them as better friends than lovers. also idt jason and percy were that close..?
- the dam and not my type jokes are srsly cringey and were never funny. ik that seems hypocritical since my username literally makes use of the dam joke but honestly i dont actually like the joke. its not funny to me and has never been funny
- the seven were not best friends. they definitely argued,, and honestly probably werent as close as the fandom makes them seem. like ure dumped with 6 other people, out of which u only know a few. my introverted ass would have jumped off the argo 2 quicker than leo valdez could bomb camp jupiter up. also leo was a dick to frank. so what if frank is bigger sized?? thats not a valid reason to tease him
- the fandom needs to stop hating on octavian while worshipping luke. if u hate luke and u say u hate octavian too, then okay. but if u tell me ure a luke stan but u despise octavian?? imma disagree w u. luke was worse than octavian im sorry. first of all, octavian being a dick was kinda justified. hes been after the praetor position for so long, and everyone keeps saying to “wait for jason” when suddenly this dude, whos a son of NEPTUNE (neptune wasnt liked much by romans), and the camp decides to make him praetor?? dude i would be pissed off big time. and then afterwards, he finds out that greek demigods are real and the dude they made praetor is greek. AND THEN GREEK DEMIGODS COME TO CJ AND ONE OF THEM BOMB IT UP?? octavian has been told all his life that greeks are scum and this dude called leo valdez attacks cj. sure it was an accident, but did octavian know that? no. so it was honestly justified that he was such a salty prick im just saying. also some of yall be hating on octavian for cutting a teddy bear open and thats the funniest shit ive ever heard i swear 
- luke didnt go to elysium
- travis and connor stoll r way too underrated. the two have been head counselors of the hermes cabin since luke was revealed as a traitor, can u imagine the stress? luke, the person they probably looked up to as a brother, betrayed them. and they didnt even have time to process this when they were  thrown the roles of being hcs. that would have been so stressful and i would probably have broken down if i were them. the stoll brothers taking turns to wake up at ungodly hours because a new camper is crying and homesick and terrified, the stoll brothers having to comfort and take care of new campers, having to deal with the amount of people in that cramped space because not enough campers are being claimed fast enough. having to resolve issues between campers in the hermes cabin all the time. the stolls arent just comedic relief, and we need to stop treating them as such
- tratie shldve been canon idc idc
- demigods of the demeter cabin arent talked about enough and i love the fact that meg was demeters kid. like she isnt the child of one of the big three yet shes so powerful.
- we need to hype clarisse up more her character arc was phucking amazing 
- rachel is overhated. sis found out greek gods exist and regularly come down to earth to fuck around and went “ok cool”. queen shit behavior methinks
- the floor 19 crew of mcga is srsly underrated. like do u even remember halfborn gunderson, mallory keen, tj, etc??? bc i feel like we only remember samirah, magnus, alex, and sometimes blitz and hearthstone
- sadie (tkc) was kinda annoying at first. i like her more now tho but i rmb not liking her for a phat while
- tkc and mcga need more love
- carter kane and jason grace arent boring. theyre just really sweet boys who are too good for this world and yes yes yes 
- hazel and frank (especially frank) need to be hyped up more. i hardly ever see anything about them. also yall seem to forget that frank was literally made praetor and that even hecate admired hazel and was willing to fight beside her because of how powerful she was
- frazels age gap is kinda sketch but i still think theyre really cute
- nico definitely had trauma from going to tartarus on his own
- GROVER IS PERCYS BEST FRIEND
- annabeth isnt smarter than leo but neither is leo smarter than annabeth. ive seen a lot of discussions about who is smarter and heres my hot take on it: neither. theyre equally smart, just in different ways. leos a genius mathematically speaking. he has no issues solving math problems meant for people much, much older than him. annabeth on the otherhand, is great at strategies etc. she can make an army of 1000 more powerful than the enemy, even if theyre outnumbered. so in my opinion, both are equally as smart//u cant compare their intelligence, because their talents lie in two different areas.
- while i do agree rick riordan isnt a god and that hes bound to make mistakes,, AND that hes given us a lot of representation,, if the representation offends the people its sposed to represent, then theres a problem. im talking about piper as a poc and wearing feathers in her hair. im not a poc, so i cant speak for them on whether or not its wrong, because i dont know either. HOWEVER, i have seen multiple posts BY pocs talking about how they didnt really like rick’s representation of piper, and thats an issue. pocs have been and are still oppressed and discriminated against by many. as a white cis man, we cant really blame him for not knowing (tho he could have done a research,, asked some pocs,, idk), but by representing pocs in that manner, hes influencing impressionable kids/teens into thinking “oh pocs wear feathers in their hair all the time” etc, which isnt true. the pjo/hoo series is extremely successful, and kids who read the books will probably start forming inaccurate opinions on pocs. the amount of fan art that depicts piper with feathers in her hair dont help either. “but rick said so in the books, so its canon” yeah well rick isnt a god and he can get some things wrong at times. im not saying we should cancel him, im saying we should start educating ourselves and not spread false info like pocs wearing feathers in their hair all the time. also that snake song shit where she sang Summertime was just- yeah. bc heres the thing you can be racist, and still include minorities, but portray them in a racist way. And even then, ignorance isn't a thing to admire. Getting those facts wrong still has a major impact. It continues to perpetuate racist stereotypes.
“ With the feather thing, I looked it up myself; it takes less than five minutes to figure out that Cherokees don't braid feathers into their hair. I didn't grow up in the country where my parents are from. I have many other first/second generation American friends who have also been through that, with a bit of a disconnect from their culture. But something that most of us have in common is that when we didn't know something, and when our parents weren't that big of a help, we looked it up. We sought out resources online and through other people from our culture to be able to connect more with where we came from. Some of that took a Google search. So I find it hard to believe that Piper, a girl who Rick's trying to portray as someone who is attempting to connect with her culture and is totally against racist stereotypes, wouldn't know that eagle feathers aren't supposed to be braided into your hair casually. She may be disconnected from her culture, but she's also shown to want to connect back to it. Piper wouldn't be casually braiding feathers into her hair while also telling off people for being racist. It makes no sense.” - reddit thread (down below) 
for those of yall who wanna know more please please read this, it has a lot of things i wanna add in here : https://www.reddit.com/r/camphalfblood/comments/gy3gl2/piper_mcleans_portrayal_is_innacurate/ 
as well as https://finding-my-culture.tumblr.com/post/189422373260/maxie-ratties-and-cattie-finding-my-culture 
i will be posting screenshots of these in future posts so if ure viewing this on ig and u dont have tumblr,, dont worry 
- the fact that most of the strong female characters in the series refuse to be “girly”, and ngl i dont really like that. just because ure girly doesnt mean u cant be strong. 
- piper would have been a great way for him to start making the strong characters act girlier, but instead he went with the “I’m not like other girls” trope which is quite obnoxious to hear constantly, and I don’t think it’s necessarily great for younger girls to read that idea growing up.  the closest we've ever had to a strong female character who was also into "girly" things was Silena. when I was younger I admired Piper's "I'm not like other girls" thing, but then I got older and realized that the whole mentality of "not like other girls" is super obnoxious, and a little bit toxic
i have a heck load more that i cant rmb rn but yeah feel free to add more 
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rabble-dabble · 4 years ago
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The Cancer King's Court ~ The Beloved Bard
Gamzee Makara/The Beloved Bard
Okay, to understand this version of Gamzee, I need to explain how a view Gamzee’s heel turn.
I don’t believe Gamzee was mind controlled, nor do I think that he was just “evil all along”. In my point of view, his mental breakdown came about as a gradual process. Firstly, he started running low on Sopor, which he was using to suppress his mental issues brought about by his lack of a proper care taker. Second, Dave had inadvertently shattered his faith in his religion, revealing it to just be some kind of ironic joke. And, third, Tavros was murdered, leaving him without one of his closest friends. He had no one to confide in. He was desperate for purpose and guidance. So, when he looked into the eyes of Little Cal, he saw the soul of his god. He saw himself inside the soul of his god. And it spoke of its grand design to Gamzee. Guiding his actions from that point torward. Allowing him an outlet for his rage and a means of achieving paradise. 
This Gamzee starts out at that exact same point. He stares into Cal’s eyes, awaiting orders from his master. However, this version of Lord English has no intention of bringing about The Dark Carnival. Some other version of him was already on the cusp of Godhood as it was. He would succeed no matter what. Might as well have some fun. The doll orders Gamzee to murder his remaining friends, deeming them all heretics who must be purged. Gamzee likely hesitates before doing as he’s told, much like I imagine he does in our timeline.
Now, Gamzee is a lot smarter than he looks. He knows that he can’t fight against outright God-tiers and expect that to go well. He needs to even the odds somehow. So, he heads to Aradia. He plays up his sorrow at Tavros’ death, which is easy enough to do seeing how it is mostly genuine, and he asks her to avenge him. Gamzee’s not well liked… but he is charismatic. He easily turned imps to his side during the game, after all. People listen to him. He can sprinkle in a few suggestions. How badly has Vriska fucked over Aradia’s life? How often has she nearly doomed the timeline? How likely is she to get everyone killed if she isn’t stopped? Aradia agrees to stop Vriska.
Now, even as a God-Tier, Vriska admitted that she stood no chance against Aradiabot during one of the walkarounds. Aradia is able to shut her down before she could summon Jack Noir. After Vriska is dealt with, Gamzee controls Eridan and makes him shoot Aradia. With his two biggest threats dealt with, Gamzee is able to overcome and kill everyone else. Rainbowdrinker Kanaya gives him some issues, but even she can only do so much. Gamzee returns and kneels before his master, asking for his next command.
The doll laughs. Lord English mockingly reveals that he had lied to Gamzee. Manipulated him for the soul purpose of seeing him kill his friends. Lil’ Cal mockingly asks if Tavros would be proud before Gamzee rips him apart in a fit of rage.
Remorseful and lonely, Gamzee tries to go to the human kids for help. He admits that all of his friends are dead, but refuses to disclose how. He’s to ashamed to lie and to afraid to confess. Rose prods the issue and eventually figures it out for herself, causing the kids to cut all contact from him. While Gamzee is quietly waiting to waste away, The Cancer King appears. Gamzee nearly bulldozes him with a hug, initially believing his own Karkat had come back from the dead. Karkat shuts him down and explains his situation. Gamzee is desperate, not only to fix what he did, but to just have some kind of cause to believe in. So, Karkat takes Gamzee to a God-Tier bed, allowing him to ascend before letting him join.
Gamzee has spent his whole life hiding behind something in order to cope with the hardships in his life. His sopor, his religion, and now his King. Gamzee fully agrees with whatever Karkat wants him to do, and actively goes above and beyond in his service to prove his loyalty. Aradia brings Karkat hundreds of sacrifices, Gamzee brings him thousands. He intimidates anyone who questions the King and indirectly influences Karkat to be more ruthless. He even went as far as making a cult out of the remains of Lord English’s cult. The second names given to everyone are the names given to them by The King’s Clowns. If Terezi is the angel on Karkat’s shoulder, Gamzee is the devil.
On top of this, Gamzee is more clingy in pursuit of Tavros. He’s pushy about hanging out with him and tends to drag him along on missions. Tavros finds Gamzee’s mote instable personality deeply disturbing, which only makes Gamzee more desperate to connect. “Would Tavros be proud of you” isn’t a question Gamzee wants to face otherwise. 
He generally gets along with everyone else in the Court, everyone is all about burying hatchets and righting wrongs here, so they make more of an effort to tolerate his eccentrics. Doesn’t mean they don’t find him creepy. He’s the one person who succeeded in killing them all in an alternate timeline, and seeing him in a fight or in one of his more irritable moods makes that scarily apparent. Some members, such as Equius, even regret not making closer friendships with their own Gamzees. They never knew just how many issues he had until he became a walking pile of issues. The exception to this is Vriska. Because, again, Tavros. Tavros hates Vriska, ergo, Gamzee hates Vriska. Yet again, Aradia plays team mom until the heat cools down.
It’s actually the human members of the Court that get along with him better (who I’ve been neglecting this whole time, but I swear I’m getting to it). Rose finds him utterly fascinating to look into and actually does a decent job of addressing his issues when they meet up. Jade takes an interest in his biology, as Gamzee is weirdly hard to kill even by God-Tier standards. If you thought he was hard to take down as a mortal, you haven’t seen anything yet. This being Gamzee, he doesn’t give a shit about being poked and proded with sciencey shit. Still, his relationship with Dave gets off on an awkward note. Dave’s the guy who sent him the ICP vid after all, but they’re able to bond over crappy father figures and a hatred for Lil’ Cal. 
On the field, Gamzee is unfettered and capricious. When he’s not hypnotizing or smooth talking large crowds into feeding the King, he’s leading his cult into battle and tormenting armies with his powers. He brings your worst fears to life as his army of fanatics rips your friends apart. The rest of the Court can be reasoned with, talked to. Make an enemy of the King, and the Clown won’t rest until he has your head.
He is dreaded across Paradox Space as the King’s most ruthless enforcer. He is the reason that God-Tiers struggle to sleep at night. He is the reason why some doomed timelines pray to the King for salvation. He is the King’s Prophet. He is the Cult’s Head. Heed the Beloved Bard when he asks you pledge your loyalty. He will not ask twice.
EVIL JOHN ANON!!!!
you’re making a sympathizer outta me.
BUT ALSO THIS IS JUST REALLY GOOD AND I SWEAR TO GOD YOU DESCRIBE GAMZEE REALLY WELL
and don't quote me but I felt like gamzee here was completely losing it while having control the entire time and I based that faint idea on how I drew him.
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that last line is killer cold btw
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frenchibi · 5 years ago
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A rant-essay about The Witcher books (and comparison to the show)
((after having read book one, and started into a good chunk of book two.))
Proceed at your own discretion, there will be a lot of frustration and swearing. Also, spoilers for basically the entirety of the Netflix show. Also, there is discussion of sexual assault and objectification and lots and lots of sexism.
The structure of my rant is as follows (because yes I structured it):
 1. Things that I enjoyed in the books
1.1 Geralt talks more
1.2 Geralt and Jaskier have a better relationship
1.3 The fairy tale theme
2. Things that made me want to scream
2.1 Geralt (is not a good character)
2.2 Yennefer (deserves better)
2.3 Jaskier's sexism (Netflix!Jaskier would NEVER)
2.4 Female Characters; Sexy Fantasy That Fucks (it's bad)
2.5 Narrative devices and structure (it’s bad)
3. Bonus: Why the audiobook grinds my gears
Total length: 4k words :’) Click to proceed.
(So, we’re doing this? I think forty likes is sufficient general interest, so... okay. Obligatory disclaimer here: This Is My Opinion. However, I am not fabricating any of the… grounds for my opinion, it is based on the content of the books, that I read, and which are broadly available, so anyone can read them and see for themselves. Personally, I would not recommend the experience, and below I will detail the reasons why. If, like I was, you’re hesitant about reading them, this essay might sway your decision either way. You might go “oh thanks op now I know I won’t like it” or “huh I think I wanna see this for myself because you’re yelling a lot”. It’s all equally valid. Anyway, let’s proceed with “things I enjoyed”.)
1.1 Geralt talks more Geralt in the books is a bit of a mess as far as characterization goes - but I don't hate that he's less stoic here and less... idk, arrogant/superior towards humans than he is in the show. He talks to people, engages with them, discloses opinions and thoughts and… it's a good look. We even get several pages of monologue from him at one point (because he is talking to a priestess who has taken a vow of silence, but I’ll take it – the books in general have a monologue/structure problem which I will address in 2.5) which is way more than the show ever provided us with. I’d like to say it gives us an insight into the character but maybe that’s a bit of a stretch, see below (2.1).
 1.2 Geralt and Jaskier have a better relationship
Geralt and Jaskier are FRIENDS. And I mean that literally the first thing we hear Geralt say about Jaskier in canon in book one is "of course I want to see him, he's my friend". Which - Netflix!Geralt could NEVER and I'm salty about it. Jaskier in the books has his own problems (2.3) but I still think he's my favorite overall, he's fun and Geralt genuinely enjoys his company. They travel together and ENJOY it, they joke, they reminisce and it is Good. Netflix, take notes.
 1.3 The fairy tale theme
This gets lost in the Netflix adaptation altogether but. The idea in the books is that all these monsters that Geralt encounters are dark twists on fairy tales and I'm HERE FOR IT. Renfri is literally Snow White But Badass. Cinderella, Rapunzel and Rumpelstiltskin’s stories are mentioned in passing, and other ideas that are explored here have fairy tale elements, e.g. slaying the dragon. It's cool, but apparently the story loses this aspect in later volumes so I guess it makes sense that the show decided to omit it. Still a bummer tho bc I liked that.
 So. Now on to Things that made me want to Scream, which is what we’re all really here for.
2.1 Geralt (is not a good character)
Geralt, oh Geralt, I wish you weren't such an obvious Mary Sue, Saviour™ and thinly veiled Jesus allegory. Geralt is always, ALWAYS right and it pisses me the fuck off. Geralt gets all the women he wants with NO PROMPTING and it makes me angry. Geralt always has the last laugh in every and any situation. Geralt is always smarter and more powerful than the Idiot Humans. Geralt ignores advice and suffers no consequences for it. Geralt has no well-thought out character, no consistency - he just is the "main character" and "hero" that the story needs - if the story needs him to be smart, he is, if it needs him to make a mistake, he does - he has no AGENCY and it’s BORING. Why am I supposed to care about him, exactly? Because the plot tells me to, and because everyone else is framed like an idiot in comparison and you’re supposed to like strong and smart characters. Cool. Bleh.
 2.2 Yennefer (deserves better)
Strap in, because this is the longest part.
Yennefer in the books is… a badass (but sexy) until the plot needs her to be a damsel (but sexy). She also occasionally has one (1) other character trait and that trait is Crazy Bitch.
I’ll admit I was not her biggest fan after the show (I didn’t really connect with her that much after she became vindictive™, though I gotta say her role in the last battle was Very Cool) but in the wake of what I have read so far, I have decided to AGGRESSIVELY STAN because she fucking. Deserves better. Oh my GOD it makes me so angry. Here’s how I think her character creation probably went:
"Ok so here we have Geralt, who is a badass, and So Cool, and he could have any Female he desires. But his Female can't be inferior and giggly and vapid like literally all other women - she needs to be the ideal fantasy Fantasy.
First: she needs powers. So we'll make her a Cool Sorceress! And more powerful than the other sorceresses because Geralt deserves the BEST. But also, he needs to be able to be Cooler and save her so she needs to be (like all females are, because they are inferior) emotionally volatile and vulnerable, and Geralt will also be the only one who gets to see that Vulnerability because Geralt has the biggest dick is her love interest. So she will be weak around him because he's just so hung wonderful.
Secondly, she needs a believable weakness (besides being too emotional because all women are too emotional), and as we all know, women have one purpose: to bREED. But not Yennefer - oh no, Yennefer is (wait for it, this is the dramatic backstory, hold your breath) broken, she's BARREN, USELESS AND EMPTY AND SHE HATES HERSELF FOR IT!!!!!
*pause for dramatic effect*
I know right that's so SEXY
[This is the point where I’m like… this might, possibly, maybe, under very different circumstances have been a compelling storyline if the author had ever consulted a woman. Or, you know, if the story was written by a woman. This is objectification and fetishization of the worst kind and I hate it. The show has this element too and it’s bad there too but it’s nowhere near as pronounced as in the books. Anyway-]
Speaking of sexy - obviously Yennefer is the sexiest of all the women Geralt has ever encountered. And because I, as the author, am aware that's unrealistic, I will drop in YET ANOTHER PIECE OF DRAMATIC BACKSTORY: She used to be a HUNCHBACK!!! *air horns* I KNOW RIGHT OH MY GOD and now she made herself SEXY with MAGIC because YOU KNOW ALL WOMEN WANT TO BE OBJECTIFIED BY MEN!!! SEXY FANTASY THAT FUCKS!!!!
[also? This is revealed to Geralt (and the reader) not by her telling him, or by a flashback, but because he "sees that she has the eyes of a hunchback". I can’t even begin to state how much I hate this.]
Anyway every time she shows up it will be mentioned how shapely her legs and breasts are and how young she looks despite the fact that she must be Old. She will turn heads and men will scorn her because she is too pretty and not interested in them and men hate anything that has any amount of sexual power or agency. but not Geralt, no, because he gets to fuck her at the end of the day so he's the only one who doesn't objectify her out loud. (but he does in his internal monologue. hooray.)
Also, to emphasize this point, we will have a side character sexually violate her while Geralt is tied up because that is The New Hotness™"
And if that wasn't enough, she as a character subscribes to what is known as "Female Hysteria For No Reason" and will become a Woman Scorned over absolutely nothing if the plot needs her to be angry.
The plot regarding her relationship with Geralt is also a bit different - in the show, she gets angry once she finds out Geralt's third wish ties them together (whether this is justified may be subjective - except yeah, no, she’s absolutely right, Geralt what the fuck??). In the book, she hears his wish as he makes it because MAGIC and is somehow SUPER INTO IT because this author has never met a human woman before.
...and then I need to complain about the storyline with the dragon. Because, you will remember, in the show, she gets angry and storms off after learning of the third wish, but that can’t be the case because she already knows about it in the books, right?
Well.
 The story in the books goes like this:
Six years ago, after one of their affairs™ Geralt leaves without waking Yennefer (but like. Leaves her flowers instead) and admittedly that's kind of rude but also like... ok. That doesn’t seem too strange a thing for Geralt to do. Maybe he just wanted to let her rest? Anyway.
They don't meet for six years, in which Geralt idk... idly misses her or something, and Yennefer develops a deep lasting hatred based on her abandonment issues…? (I am. grasping. there's no good reason if this relationship is as casual to both of them as they have made it sound, but she is SUPER MAD because the plot needs her to be ANGERY).
So with his backdrop, cue the search for the dragon. Geralt is like "eh I'll join them. I have nowhere better to be, also Jaskier is here and he's not boring so ok" and then he hears Yennefer will also be there and goes "oh well all the better, haven't seen her in a while"
And when he follows her to her tent to greet her, she spits verbal FIRE at him and is like "bitch you're lucky i didn't gouge your fucking EYES out" and other lovely statements of a similar calibre, and Geralt just stands there and takes it and tells her he missed her.
which implies either a) he knows what he did and he thinks he deserves this, or b) he has done nothing wrong in his own eyes and this is just "bitch crazy" to be ignored. It is heavily implied to be b), because, in our third person POV narrative, we get NO REMORSE from him, no indication as to what he thinks about this whole thing Yennefer is accusing him of, nothing at all in terms of emotional response to her. Cool. She yells at him and then storms of, and he just… idk, shrugs I guess?
So, they travel, Yennefer is Icy Bitch Queen but also everyone hates her and insults her to an absurd degree (see above, she's Too Sexy and Powerful and also like, a Woman) and she takes it without saying anything back but it's obvious that everyone's trash talk is affecting her (so it’s obvious that at some point she will be Vulnerable again). Jaskier, who seems to have no personal grudge against her at this point in the books, joins in the teasing because he's there to make fun of everyone I guess? (boy.) No deeper malice from him than from anyone else though.
And then, for drama, the party reaches a narrow bridge. They’re debating whether or not it is safe to cross with all their supplies and then BAM! there's a landslide so they have no choice. The events go like this:
- Geralt lets the others cross first. Right as he wants to cross, he hears Yennefer yell because her horse fell over, because of course it did
- Geralt abandons his own means of escape to go help her up, and then she proceeds to save his ass because SHE HAS FUCKING MAGIC THERE WAS NO POINT IN YOU GOING TO SAVE HER YOU FUCKER she just makes a shield so nothing hits them and they stumble to the bridge
- they get caught on the bridge as it collapses, and of course Yennefer is the one who falls first, and he catches her, so they're both hanging there and he's holding on to her suspended over this. Canyon or whatever.
- Jaskier, from above, yells to the others to get a rope to help pull them up but they respond to "wait until the bitch has fallen, then we'll pull the witcher up"
which. wow. but ok.
Yennefer can barely hold on, and HERE is where Geralt asks her to forgive him for… his wrongdoings…? (you know, can't have her die with a grudge, I guess? Or whatever?) He's like "Yen, forgive me" and she says "NEVER"
((and also, she has consistently kept telling him to stop calling her Yen (which he first started when they started... having Relations™ so obviously now it has bad memories attached to it for her), which he blatantly ignores because her feelings don't matter))
In the end, Jaskier gets the others to help despite their reluctance and hatred of Yennefer and they travel on. Yennefer's back to being Ice Queen - and then they find the dragon. Some fucker tries to fight it alone and gets injured. Yennefer is in charge of healing this dude, and so she ends up alone with Geralt in a tent – where she asks him to double-cross everyone else and kill the dragon himself (after telling them all she would cooperate with them) - "for me. I want the dragon, Geralt, for myself. All of it. I don't want to share. Kill it for me" and then explains that not all is lost because with certain parts of the dragon, SOMEONE CAN CURE HER BARRENNESS and i want to launch myself into the fucking sun
Geralt is like "uhhhh"
she says "on the bridge, you asked for my forgiveness- if you do this, I'll forgive you"
and then HE GOES "well, that no longer matters to me. I'm over it now" which hsadjlkfhsajdklfhsajkldfhaskdfsj I cannot begin to impart to you how many levels of “UGH” I felt at the predictable reversal of roles because he can’t ACTUALLY have to apologize to her – it’s HER who has to apologize to HIM for being an irrational Female
and now SHE'S all like. quivering lip and wanting him back or whatever and I am SICKENED that SHE IS THE ONE WHO HAS TO GROVEL NOW BECAUSE THE PLOT CANNOT HAVE GERALT EVER MAKE A MISTAKE AND OWN TO IT?!?
Thanks, I hate it.
 Oh and I almost forgot in all my rage about that storyline – when we first meet her, we learn that Yennefer apparently doesn’t “bother with the whalebone [i.e. corset] nonsense other women use” (literal quote from the book) so I guess her tits are magic???
This just in, if she needs boob support SHE’S A THOT, if your knockers don’t stand on their own you’re INFERIOR and NOT DESIRABLE, GTFO.
 2.3 Jaskier’s sexism (Netflix!Jaskier would never)
Jaskier, you have been done dirty.
It could have been so cool too - Jaskier in the books is witty and likeable and makes friends wherever he goes because everyone likes a bard?? Also he's really smart and knowledgeable because "a bard needs to know about many things" which is SO VALID??? And Geralt trusts him and cares about his opinion??? And also it's clear Jaskier likes Geralt, not just for the purpose of writing ballads about him, but because they're old friends, they've travelled together a lot - yes, their relationship is good here, regardless of your shipping preferences. (Also, he wears a hat with a large feather on it, which is how Geralt recognizes him in crowds, and it's amazing and hilarious.)
HOWEVER.
Jaskier treats women terribly. At his first introduction, he literally gropes a priestess (and then makes fun of the high priestess for chastising him for it). He sees women very much as objects to be… maybe not “won” but, well, persuaded, which makes him a tiny bit better than most of the other men, who are basically straight-up rapists. But then there's the scene with Yennefer which. Made everything turn sour tbh. It goes like this:
Yennefer wants to go after the dragon alone (see above), but before she can get Geralt to do it for her and double-cross everyone, she's overwhelmed by some of the other men in the party and they're all tied up (Jaskier, Geralt, some other pacifist sorcerer who is around, and Yennefer). And one of the men, who hates her for her (sexual) power, rips open her blouse and exposes her and assaults her while she screams, so then he gags her. And then when he’s done he walks away and leaves her exposed. Geralt looks away after she screams at him not to stare (wow, points for chivalry, the standard is literally So Low - also his justification for obeying her wishes is that he’s already seen her boobs so it’s not a big deal to him anymore) but Jaskier shamelessly stares at her even after she makes it absolutely clear she does not consent to ANY of this and has no choice because SHE IS TIED UP, and he even jokes that he'll write a ballad about her perfect breasts. And I'm over here like.... no. no, no, no, no, no. Jaskier deserved better characterization and Yennefer deserves a better fucking franchise.
 2.4 Female characters; Sexy Fantasy That Fucks (it’s bad)
I have touched a lot on this already so I'll try to be brief, but. Ugh.
Sexy Fantasy That Fucks™ is practically a legit genre and sadly a lot of semi-progressive fantasy falls into this category - where we have moved on from having only like one or two named female character (see: LotR) to having several, and look, they can even fight, but only as long as they're aggressively sexually attractive to men while they do it. Poor Harley Quinn suffered the same treatment in Suicide Squad - The Male Gaze Filter.
Here in the books it goes like this: Oh look, “vaguely tribal” women who fight - but they're also the most overtly sexual and involved in a canon off-screen orgy with Geralt and an older (practically old) man and are portrayed as Perpetually Horny. Oh look, Yennefer, a badass sorceress who falls apart when Geralt so much as looks her way because Geralt is so fucking great I guess. Then there’s the 14-year-old striga princess who needs to be described, once her curse is lifted, with emphasis to her “perky breasts”. SHE'S FOURTEEN. And there’s the young priestesses, who are subtly flattered by Jaskier's direct "advances" because, you know, they've dedicated their lives to serving a goddess but understandably they just WANT TO FUCK™.
There is a single female character who is not sexualized - the head priestess, Nenneke. She's described as fat and old (and wise though, throw her a bone). Geralt respects her because of her wisdom but that's it - she has a Use™. And also, he ignores her advice in the end anyway. Pity she wasn't more beautiful I guess. I am Sickened.
 2.5 Narrative devices and structure (it’s bad)
Now, we get to the bones of the thing. There's... one main thing that really bothers me and that's a CLASSIC - the fact that this author prefers to have action explained to the reader through monologues by characters that inexplicably have All The Information, rather than have us, you know, experience the action first hand. There are a couple of fight scenes of Geralt vs A Monster, sure, but that's all we get - everything else is told to us through monologues. (and yes it's still a monologue even if Geralt interrupts to say "go on" or "get to the point". It's not really a dialogue if the other person is only being expositioned at. Now Geralt just looks impatient and annoying.) Even the short story format (of the first two books) is explained this way: the individual short stories are monologues within conversations in the base timeline, explaining to the reader (and to Nenneke in the narrative proper) backstories and how characters met.
Which... it's a choice? It makes more sense than the show with it’s wack-ass timeline with absolutely no conext. But like. Why can't you have us at least discover the respective monster through someone else's POV though? I get that we're always staying with Geralt because Geralt is oh so great, but rather than have some Constable explain to him for like twelve pages how the princess (who is, without any intrigue, an incest-princess - this is not a mystery, everybody is aware of this at the beginning of the story and freely provides this information without prompting) became a striga and how many people she has killed and what people say she looks like and how to allegedly cure her - can’t we see that shit happen? Like... ok, thanks? I hate it. The show did this better.
 3. Bonus: why the audiobook grinds my gears
Last and definitely least - the audiobook is BAD (but I don't want to buy physical copies, and my library won't have the English version because I live in Germany, so I guess I'm stuck with it). The guy who reads it is Bad At Reading Out Loud because his emphasis/cadence is incredibly unnatural (also regrettably all the books are read by the same guy) and his pronunciation of names (most notably Jaskier, who is called Dandelion in the English version of the books) is inconsistent??? He started out by (correctly) calling him dandelion in book 1 and now has changed to pronouncing it dandelion, like the flower, which is not how you say his name (and... no offense if he’d started out that way because I, too, thought that was how you said it just from reading the word - but he says it CORRECTLY in the first book and then changes it to the wrong pronunciation in book two so I’m confused?? How does that happen?)
Also - different accents for different characters are only a good idea if a) you're good at accents and b) they aren't overtly connoted? Like. Don't give a guy in a fantasy setting a bad russian accent??? Also what part of Geralt as a character made you think SCOTTISH???? Oof.
And another thing - these little descriptors after direct speech? They MATTER.
"Don't touch me," Yennefer hissed
and
"Don't touch me," Yennefer screamed
are two very different sentences and should be read as such. You can't just. Say "Don't touch me" seductively and then add "she yelled". That's not how voice acting works. Please, pLEASE I'M SUFFERING. I was already struggling enough with some of the content of the books and now you’re making consuming them really difficult and irritating :’) Oof.
 In conclusion – I don’t even know. I was mad and now I’m tired.
  Anyway, all this to say – I didn’t hate every aspect of the books. I will keep reading (in my case listening) because I’m stupid, I apparently love to suffer and I am, thanks to the show, invested in the storyline and want to know what happens. But I will most certainly keep complaining about them because that’s the only way to make this fun for myself. And are you not entertained?!
Who knows. Maybe stuff will get better.
Take from this post what you will, and if it’s only my personal hypocrisy then that’s fine. I hope you had a nice day – I’m gonna go make myself some tea to calm down. And I’ll have you know that despite what you may have heard, I have never worn a bra in my life, because I’m not like other girls.
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suddenly-i-kin-oikawa · 5 years ago
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Imagine Uncle Ben trying to tell Peter it’s not his fault, but he’s so close to death that it sounds like “It’s....your fault....”
@clover-roseee @merlinfreya27 @banesbitch Okay so, I was going for something short but it tuned into something big and I am not good at writing Peter Parker whump. Or sad shit in general. Sorry it’s bad!
TRIGG​ER WARNING: NEGLECT, DEATH, VICTUM BLAMING, ALLUDING RAPE OF A MINOR, (a little) MENTION OF BLOOD, VAGUE SENSORY OVER LOAD, CURSING
That’s it I think
Once those words registered over Peter’s panic, everything around him stopped.
The baby laughing three blocks over went silent. The couple arguing over their child’s crying froze, venom still dripping from their tounges. The stray dog a few alley ways over stopped it’s weak, desperate hunt for food. 
As Ben Parker died in his arms, Peter swore he felt something shatter inside him.
All at once sound rushed back and struck with a vengence. 
Too loud, it was too loud tooloudtooloudTOOLOUDTOOLOU-
Peter Parker screamed and New York shuddered.
*****
Peter Parker was the kid everyone wished they were. Loving family, perfect grades, amazing friends, and all around happy go lucky guy. You would never see him without a smile on his face and you could barely walk down the halls without hearing him laughing about something with his friends.
Yeah, sure, his parents died. But they didn’t care! Many kids look at Peter Parker and think losing their parents is worth what that kid has.
(“Uncle Ben?”
“Yeah bud?”
“Do you think when I show Daddy and Mommy what I made, they’ll let me go with them next time?”
“....”
“N-never mind.”)
(“Daddy! Look! I made a robot out of the spare parts you gave me and I named it-”
“Yeah, good job, Peter, but I’m busy right now, go show Mommy.”
“Oh. Okay. S-sorry.”
Peter doesn't show Mommy M.A.G.S (Motherly Affection Giving Simulator))
(“Why can’t you take me with you! You promised!”
“Listen, Peter, your father and I decided that after this trip, we’re going on a vacation to wherever you want! Huh? How does that sound?”
“Really?”
“Uh huh, now all you have to do is be good for your uncle and aunt, okay? You can’t be making messes like you do at the house. It’s irresponsible and you should know better? Right?”
“Y-yes ma’am.”
“Good boy, now, see you in a few days okay?”
“You won’t break your promise again will you?”
“No, Peter. Now we have to go, or else we’ll be late. Bye peter.”
“Bye Mom-”
*Dial tone*)
(”Peter! Peter baby is that you?!”
“M-mommy? What are you doing? You said you’re not aloud to call-”
“PETER! Baby, baby listen, please. Please....”
“Mommy? Mommy!?”
“Peter?”
“Daddy! What’s happening? What’s happened to Mommy?”
“Mommy....Mommy’s gone to sleep. A-and Daddy will too, soon.”
“What? I can’t hear you, people are screaming? Daddy!”
“Pete, we lov-”
Uncle Ben wasn’t fast enough to stop Peter from hearing the sound of his parents dying in his ears. Or his dreams.)
******
Everyone remembers when little Teacher Pet Pete had a high schooler for a friend. Betty was the one who told everyone. She had been reading old newspaper articles not too far from Peter when it happened. At first, she thought he was gong to bully him (Serves him right, she thought, for being such a know-it-all after I answered that question wrong) but then he sat down and smiled and laughed and gave him a really cool nickname.
They were best friends and Peter always hung out with him. It wasn’t fair. Many wished they were lucky enough to be friends with Skip Westcott.
(”Hey kid. I’ve seen you around here a lot, always with your head in a book at least three times your size. You actually know what this stuff means?”
“M-me?”
“Yeah, you. Come on, don’t leave me hanging!”
“My p-parents used to read me stuff like this before bed.” And by read he meant set an audio tape.
“Wow, you’re a real Einstein, aren’t you? Gosh, I wish I was as smart as you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah! How about this, since you seem cool and all, how about we hang out.”
“Like...like friends?”
“Yeah, best friends.”)
(”I have to thank you again, Steven, you’ve been such a great friend to Peter. We honestly were worried for a little bit. He’s never brought a friend over before, or been to anybody's house. He’s never even talked about any friends from school.”
“No need to thank me, Mrs. Parker. Kid’s a genius and he’s fun to be around. It’s honestly no hassle at all to watch him. I love having him around.”
“Really? Cause Ben and I need to go to a funeral next week for about four days. You see, Ben’s cousin died from Cancer not too long ago, but we weren’t going to go since we didn’t want to bring Peter to another funeral so soon.”
“You go on ahead, my parents love Petey almost more than me! We’ll be fine watching him while you’re gone.”
“Oh you’re such a sweetheart!”)
(”Hey Einstein.”
“Yes, Skip?”
“You wanna play a new game?”
“Yeah! What’s it about?”
“Well.... Ah, never mind. You’re too young for it.”
“No I’m not! I’m super smart! I can do it, I promise, tell me what it’s about!”
“One second, I have to get something.”
“....Okay.”
“Here we go, now, we have to do what these people are doing in the magazine. It’s super fun and it feels so good.”
“Skip.... I- I don’t think I wanna p-play anymore.”
“But, Einstein, you promised. You can’t back out now. I always play your games that are honestly, kinda childish. You shouldn’t be so selfish all the time.”
“I...I- Okay.... I’ll play, but you hafta stop when I say so.”
“Don’t worry, you won’t want to.”)
(”Y-you didn’t stop.”
“You just felt so good, I couldn’t.”
“I don’t want to do this anymore.”
“God DAMN IT, Einstein! You’re always so fuckin’ selfish. Why is it always about you? Why can’t you just stop being so self-centered all the fuckin’ time? Damn, no wonder you have no friends but me, you should be grateful!”)
(”You’re perfect Pete, so perfect. Don’t wanna stop. You don’t either, I know you don’t. You love this you filthy little sl-”)
(“Peter? Peter honey are you okay? We’ve noticed you haven’t been getting much sleep lately. Are you okay baby?”
“Yeah, and what’s going on with you and Steven? You haven’t wanted to hang out with him much any more, what’s going on?”
“I...I’M SO SORRY! I DIDN’T WANT IT I PROMISE! IT HURT IT HURT SO BAD UNCLE BEN I S-SAID STOP HE WOULDN’T STOP i- i... I’m sorry, sorry, I said stop.... B-but he said it f-felt too... too good and .... selfish..... hurt.... no....”
“Shhh, it won’t happen anymore I promise, you’ll never see him again I swear.”)
(”Breaking News, High Schooler, Steven “Skip” Westcott, beaten to death in prison after being revealed as a child molester and pedophile.”
“Pete, no, don’t watch this.”)
******
His fault. his fault. HIS FAULT HIS FAULT.
If he’d just distracted his mom longer-
If he had just told Ben sooner-
If he’d have just dealt with
If he’d just been smarter-
If he had just been dumber-
If he’s just caught
If he’d just asked more-
If he had just said no-
IF HE HAD STOP BEING SO GOD DAMN SELFISH
****
(”Uncl- Ben.... Ben I’m so sorry! This this is all my fault! If I'd just- FUCK! You’re gonna be okay. Gonne be okay.”
“Pete....”
“Ben, come on, you can’t leave me too. PLEASE!”
“Pete.... Peter, it’s....”
“Ben?”
“It’s (not) your fault....”
It’s his fault.
The blood is on his hands.
It’s his fault.
Something shattered inside him.
Peter Parker screamed and the edges tore him to pieces.
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kariachi · 5 years ago
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Been looking forward ot this one y’all- The Greatest Lake, which supposedly contains not just Hex (easily one of the funnest of the reboot’s villains) but also Kevin (who is, of course, the perfect being)! It’s bound to be wonderful, with a combo like that, and we’ll finally get an answer to the age-old question-
Does Hex go in the fucking pit
Another Kelly Turnbull episode! Which, again, means this is gonna be a good episode for story and visuals! I swear this woman is a fucking goddess.
You should’ve known better to cannonball around Ben, Gwen, we had a whole episode about this
Max has rented a speedboat for the sake of aquatic athletics
Attack of the killer lake. And here I thought you only had to worry about that if you were a Saturday
Erie’s gotten more handsy since I was last out there
Ben: Some bad guy must be trying to make me look bad at kneeboarding! Gwen: Yeah, that’s why you suck
Hi Hex
He’s not even paying attention, he’s busy reading
Hex: Stop bothering the beachgoers, we’ve got work to do Water Spirits: Sure boss
The Sword of MacGuffin. Of course. Of course that’s what he’s looking for. I love this show so much you guys.
Hex: *sees Ben* I see not even the sanctity of the Canadian border can stop your incessant pestering!
Just jumping straight to annihilation today
Welp, Hex having to choose between having an elemental army or blasting the Tennysons into the stratosphere
Hex: Fuck it, I got work to do and elemental armies to lead, my apprentice can handle this
Ben: “What kind of loser would actually wanna work with Hex?“ Kevin: “Hey!”
My son, y’all
Look at him
He’s got a matching hood and everything
And floaties
Floaties my son can’t even float
Dear gods save me this is too adorable
I mean he has a hood to match Hex’s that’s so fucking cute!
Even the Forever Dipshit didn’t even fucking bother to get him into the aesthetic! Of course I suppose Hex and Kevin’s aesthetics are easier to make work together
I swear Hex if you fuck this up I will have your head on a pike as a warning to any other adults that might run into Kevin, even if we’re mostly out of them
My booooyyyyy
Have I mentioned one of the floaties is a fucking giraffe one I mean my god
When you have to mute the show otherwise you will be overwhelmed because your son is on the screen and you are dying
Oh my fuck Kevin accusing Ben of being jealous that Hex took him under his wing lords preserve me
The thing is it’s not even like there’s nothing for Hex to build off with him I mean we all saw what Charmcaster was able to do with his poetry, if he can learn to make that shit work for himself he’ll be a true fucking terror.
Hex: “Not ‘intern’, apprentice. We’re sorcerers, not cubicle dwellers.”
How did these two even meet? How did this happen? How long has it been happening? Inquiring minds need to know
Oh look, a vaguely greek temple in Lake Erie.
Hex: “I haven’t had a plan work this seamlessly all summer. I’d be moved to tears if this eyeliner were waterproof.”
“Mr. Goth Wizard, sir?” my fucking god this child is too precious. Don’t fuck this up, Hex, for all our sakes!
Hex, leaving Kevin, quote, ‘in charge of destroying the Tennyson whelps’ while he heads for the temple so he can get this sword
Kevin is actually listening to what he’s told without the need for putdowns or belittling or any mouthiness on his part so far. This either a bad sign for how he’s taking the way these adults have been treating him so far or a good sign of how his time with Hex has been going
Hex: Have them destroyed by the time I get back Kevin: Don’t you wanna test the sword out in them? Hex: No, I want you to do as you’re told
And there we go, I’ve been here long enough it’s all a spiral from this point.
Kevin: *grumbles about how he better be learning some damn good magic to be putting up with this shit*
1) Ben picking Rath to fight in a lake. Because this child. 2) My son has spells. This is either going to be awesome or sad
Oh thanks show, cut to Hex why don’t you
The spell on the door takes so much mana to take out that the damn thing tried to eat Hex
And Max and Gwen have taken advantage of Kevin being distracted with Ben to take out Hex’s elementals
Hex is, how you say, not pleased
I really don’t know what he expected, given he can’t handle the Tennysons, but sure, your apprentice is gonna do better
Kevin is just having too much fun messing with Ben
I cannot help but feel, Hex, that you could’ve handled this whole mess smarter. Step one: I’m fairly certain apprentices aren’t supposed to be thrown out as a distraction while you go around doing magic without them
Kevin pls do not call your teacher a loser while he is in the area, given your track record...
Oh gods, he’s claiming Hex promised him the sword if this all works out and just, it ain’t
“You know he doesn’t care about you right?” Ben, honeybunch, I hate to have to actually say it, but so far with Kevin? Nobody fucking does. Like, that’s not even an armor-piercing question, that’s like stepping out and going “you know the sky’s still blue, right?” The closest we came to a non-Tennyson giving a rats ass about Kevin was Vin, and then he turned out to give more of a damn about having the approval of other adults than the did any child. Fucking Max is the most stable adult figure in his life by far and it’s not exactly a high bar to reach. Every other adult didn’t care about him, every single one, and if you’re gonna be trying to get through to Kevin with revelations then you may wanna figure that out!
*deep breath* I’m calm. I’m chill. I’m calm.
Kevin throws Ben into Hex on accident, not gonna end well
Oh lords Kevin’s not even using spells he was taught, he’s testing new material on Ben because of course he is
Although can we discuss the fact that he was doing well with it? Which means either he’s been practicing it on his own time or he’s got a natural talent for this shit, and given what his poetry did it could go either way
Oh lords ‘The Ancient Magi Code’ and talk of how he’s supposed to fucking follow it includes being expected to follow Hex’s instructions to the letter. Because we’ve all seen how well Kevin takes orders. I mean lords he was already getting aggravated about it earlier, even as he did it. He’s been positively behaving by his own standards.
And lo, arguing breaks out between the teacher who’s really not that good at it and who is very tradition focused, and the student who is very much an independent soul who doesn’t take orders well and needs a more... positive approach.
Welp.
Can we just discuss the growth, the difference between Kevin here and Kevin when he was working with the Forever Dipshit? There’s actual concern about having fucked up here, for one, which he never showed with regards to FD despite the fact that one tried to kill him at one point for not following orders exactly. Just, if nothing else it’s a good indicator of the difference between his relationships with the two, where one is a teacher and semi-reasonable at least while the other was just, a complete piece of shit. I mean Hex taught Kevin magic and practiced it with him, promised him a fucking sword, while FD just gave him a tv dinner and a bad attitude
“-unabashed, unrepentant incompetence!” Goddamn, Hex, breathe! Also the boy ain’t incompetent he’s just fucking 11. That’s at the low end for apprenticing, even historically, and you’ve also got the fact that he’s an independent little sod and that you’ve been treating him more like a minion than an apprentice today (it’s a big difference). This is a fuck-up, and the arguing back is annoying, but still the situation with him is manageable.
My poor son did not expect major consequences, such as being dropped as an apprentice and losing the fucking shit that was helping him use magic period
Hex, fucking done, is getting that fucking sword if it kills him so he can have one fucking success this summer
Kevin, as always, does not take such insults lightly. Cue ‘out for blood’ face
Ben: “I can’t stand you, and even I thought Hex was being a real jerk back there” Kevin: “Yeah, I was doing a pretty good job kicking your butt before he distracted me”
All said while the Tennysons are picking up a Kevin out of the lake. I swear this is just the only way this boy knows to interact with people
Okay I paused after Hex fucking unveiled the temple again sent the whole groups crashing to the bottom of the lake as an offhand consequence and y’all the look on my boy’s face when he hears Hex growling about needing that damn sword. The fucking sad puppy eyes!
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Look at that face!! My poor baby! He is so sad and so hurt!
Ben and Kevin, working together to kick Hex’s giant water elemental’s butt
Oh my fuck mutual transformation sequence. wtf is this Sailor Moon?
Kevin, noticing Ben has armored aliens now: Bitch!
The problem, is that much as I try I can’t mention everything. There’s so much good
Kevin, as Bootleg: Get out the boat, I’m hijacking it Gwen: No Kevin: Okay *hijacks it with them inside*
Gwen: *incredible excited to now have a boat with a canon because Kevin is awesome like that* Max: *concerned about whether Boatleg meets safety standards*
“Useless child. I can retrieve the Sword of MacGuffin without his assistance.” I don’t believe anyone was claiming otherwise, Hex. Although I think you’re going to find it difficult to do with him actively working against you. I’m afraid they’re his only settings
Max, on the giant water elemental: Maybe it just needs a friend and a big hug Kevin: Unlikely
Gwen, coming in with the plan to save the day
Even as a boat Kevin is a very agile little thing
Here lies Hex, dead of lake
Oh my gods dark magic is against the rules of the lake
Kevin: That was probably my only chance to use a cool cursed sword. Thanks a lot, Tennyson. Ben: Bitch!
Ben making the valid point that Kevin was at real risk of having to suck up to Hex for the next several millennia
The fucking cop telling Hex to get with the century and invest in some waterproof eyeliner
This just in, both boys are equally shit at kneeboarding.
10/11, Hex doesn’t go in the pit, but he may wanna be careful the next time he shares an episode with Kevin
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pluviophile-bookworm · 5 years ago
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Thoughts/ reaction to AWAE 3x7
This cold open is… different. It has actual tension. Also, it ties directly to the end of last episode, and gods know I love that. And… it has actual speaking, too? Honestly, Anne is the typical teenager caught sneaking back in at night, while also being socially engaged. I mean, there’s nothing typical about her and the present mission of hers, but an untrained eye might have thought so.
I’m honestly afraid of people’s reaction to whatever Anne wrote in that paper. I have been since last week, and maybe not without good reason.
Have Diana’s parents learnt nothing? Not even from missing their chance with Mary? Apparently these people are immune to redemption. I hope I’m wrong about this.
Diana’s face after excusing Anne oh-so-smoothly is just like, “What has she done now?”, but she’s still not letting anything on. This is the friend we all dream of. 
Poor Josie is getting those judging looks from everyone while Billy just sits there like he has nothing to do with it. In fact, he seems annoyed by the whole situation. Who gave you the right? How dare you sit there like you have no part in this? If I were Anne, I would definitely have done all she did and more. Heck, even if I were just me, I would have done something, and I’m so afraid of speaking up… Billy deserves the worst.
It seems to me that Josie’s father is no better than Billy. Blaming his own daughter and making her marry that little piece of *no swearing on main, but you’ll know what I mean* after what he did to her? Someone needs to teach those men a big lesson. 
“Get him back”? Don’t you mean get back at him? Listen to your daughter, woman, why don’t you?
“How bad could it be?” Let’s just say you’re lucky not to know. I’m screaming right now, but we’ll have to live through this. No change comes without suffering. 
Anne asking Marilla if she doesn’t deserve an opinion, and then bringing up Matthew’s blunder… hitting where it hurts the most, that’s what that was.
“All will sort itself out” Yeah it will, if Billy never so much as goes near another girl again. But we all know that’s not happening.
What? They’re looking for another girl? “More compatible with our interests”? What does that mean? Okay with being assaulted and treated like a piece of meat with no soul or opinion? No girl deserves the monstrosity that is Billy Andrews. 
I knew Prissy would speak up. I hoped and prayed for at least one member of that family to have their mind and heart in the right place. The world needs more women like Prissy Andrews. At least two for every man like Billy Andrews. I still can’t wrap my mind around the two of them coming from the same genes. Biology and blood relations make no sense when it comes to what matters most, I guess. 
Has Diana gone nuts? “Apologise to Josie”? For what? Trying to speak up for her when she herself wouldn’t dare to? Telling the honest truth to a town of people that are apparently too narrow-minded to see it? This isn’t the Diana that kissed Jerry at the fair last week. This isn’t the Diana that would fake an injury to experience freedom. I’m witnessing a full-speed slide down the metaphorical hill of character growth, back to square one. I’m disappointed in my girl.
“You’ve always been jealous of me”… for what? Being engaged to a piece of *see above* that assaulted you? Or for being too blinded by what society has taught you to believe - that you are lucky to be marrying him and are not the victim of what he did to you? Honestly, I feel bad for Anne in the present situation, but I feel even worse for Josie because, unlike Anne, she doesn’t seem to realise that she is the victim here and has rights to fight for. I hope this works out.
But honestly, does none of the girls remember about the Beltane? Does Diana not remember that Josie was in their circle and is therefore their sister now? Does Jane not remember what happened to her actual sister not so long ago - which said sister just reminded her of, in case she had forgotten? Josie is now her sister, too. Does that mean nothing? Is ostracising Anne and treating her like trash all over again going to benefit any of those girls? What is with everybody? Wake up, people!
Oh, shut up, Gilbert Blythe! Or whoever you are these days because I frankly don’t know you anymore. Do you still not realise what this is all about?
And Miss Stacy, too? You’d think she would have a thing or two to say about women’s rights. What is wrong with everybody?
Oh, so she agrees with Anne, but still won’t help her? I see where she’s coming from, but right now everything that goes against Anne even in the slightest is wrong in my eyes and ears. I’m looking at this too passionately. I might need to cool off. 
All of a sudden I sympathise with Rachel Lynde. Who would have thought? But well, she just so happens to be the only woman in a council of men. Them trying to pass her opinion off as “hysterical” fits in perfectly with the theme of the episode about women’s voices and the right to equality. 
Ok, so Diana might not be so lost, after all. I have to admit, I squeal in delight at the sight of her and Jerry. But… wait. What is going on just now? I’m not liking the sound of this. And why do I feel like his heart wasn’t in that kiss? Why are you doing this to me? I should be excited, nay, ecstatic, about Derry’s second kiss. Not hurt by the look on Jerry’s face. What did you do to my boy, Moira?
Miss Stacy seems to have finally come to her senses and is ranting about the stupid censorship that stupid men put on the newspaper instead of the “scandalous” actions that Anne took. And Anne having a full-on raging breakdown and taking it out on the remains of the writing club… “We rest in truth”… I feel for her.
Gilbert has finally come back. I have no idea where he was all this time, but he’s back and there’s at least one thing in this episode I’m glad about. It seems that suffering does bring about change, after all. 
Anne coming back and being accepted with literal open arms… and then Gilbert’s face says it all. “I did what’s right. It was about time.”
“Anne’s farm boy is ever so tall…” First of all, yes he is, isn’t he? *heart eyes* Second of all. though, he has a name, and it’s Jerry. Third of all, he’s not Anne’s farm boy, he’s her brother. But at least we agree on something. Honestly, every now and then I feel that if I were to write a self-insert character for AWAE, I would end up with Ruby. She is just so much like me…
“Wonder if he has a farm girl…” Jerry’s just trying his best to hide at this point, and Diana looks like she would very much like to hide as well. But this is not hiding of the “secret forbidden romance” type. Why do I feel… embarrassment in her eyes? This is not my Diana. 
“I’m certain Billy won’t understand any of it” - and that’s why the business should go to Prissy alone. Also because Billy deserves nothing, whether he understands the business or not. 
What is wrong with Josie? The poor girl doesn’t even understand she’s perpetuating her own suffering. At least Anne tried. Multiple times. I’m afraid some victims deny themselves the chance to be saved…
“My girl”… oh sweet, gentle, wonderful Jerry… I fear she might not be very worthy of you right now… Also, it’s funny (read: cruel) what the fates do to us. I’ve wanted for Anne to know about Derry, but not in circumstances such as these…
“She seems to like the kissing part, but not the part where we talk”… this seems like a half-subtle parallel between their situation and what Billy did to Josie, and I’m not liking the implications this has about Diana. And it seems Anne has got the same impressions…
Poor, poor Jerry… I can barely see what I’m typing right now because I’m bawling my eyes out. I so wish I could be there to give him a hug and tell him just how much more he’s worth. Only, I couldn’t be much help because, as I said, I’m bawling my eyes out myself… That is NOT my Diana. Who’d have known the day I’d take Gilbert back in would be the day I’d lose Diana? But this is not about her. This is about how she made Jerry feel - wonderful, hard-working, smarter-than-he-is-given-credit-for Jerry who deserves absolutely no hurt. I knew the development of Derry was too good to last, but I did not expect the pain to come from within. I expected anything - society, their class difference, their families, even Diana’s higher education - to come between them, but never Diana’s behaviour to Jerry. Excuse me while I go throw pillows at my wall in rage and heartbreak. 
“They can’t take your beauty away from you”… Umm, exuse me? All this happened because Josie was reduced to a “pretty face”. But you wouldn’t know. You weren’t there. She was, though, and she seems to finally realise just what was done to her. Please don’t let me be wrong in assuming that.
“I still like you”? Come again? What has happened that might reduce her likeability other than what you alone did to her? You’re an entitled effing brat, that’s what you are. And she owes you nothing. Good on Josie for finally realising her worth. 
And you dare to just show up and act like nothing happened after what you did to Anne’s brother? If somebody treated my brother like this, I would make them pay. That much I know.  I thought you would know better, Diana. “It doesn’t mean anything”… you better shut your mouth before you say anything else hurtful about the two people you’re alleged to love the most. walking on thin ice there, Miss Barry. 
“Don’t you dare” No, don’t YOU dare! I was afraid Jerry would be just a temporary escape, a little adventure to Diana, but I shuddered to think it would be so anywhere beyond my anxiety-induced nightmares… and now there are some insulting words floating around in my head that I’m not directing at her just because I’m sure that, unlike Billy, she will redeem herself. I’m dying right here. I did not opt to miss my lectures to cry so much. 
A real quote from my reaction to 3x5: “I live and would die for Anne and Diana’s friendship.” Well, now I feel like I AM dying - because this seems like the end of it. My brain knows it’s not, but my heart sides with Anne. And Jerry. I side with respect and equality. What side are you on, Diana?
“Just a suggestion. Not telling you what to do”… Gilbert seems genuinely a bit scared of her and I’m still dying - but now it’s of laughter. Gil has learnt his lesson and as of now deserves to be called Gil again… until further notice. 
And the “rallying” that the episode description promised is in full force now. I’m finally smiling at this episode. It was high time. 
Marilla stading up for Anne in front of the council and Matthew just smiling with pride is the golden content I had already lost all hope to see in this darkest of dark episodes… In Matthew We Trust!
In the name of all that is holy, I hope Moira’s deviations from the source material include the survival of both Matthew and Ruby. Seriously, source material, Matthew and Ruby? The biggest cinnamon rolls of them all? what’s next, Jerry? Delphine? No, forget I ever said that. 
And now Josie joining in is just about the best thing I can hope to see before the hurricane of suffering this episode is comes to its end. 
The “Not a Take Notice kind of guy” scene flashed through my mind when Gilbert said “Thanks for the suggestions”… this moment is so different, so much better… My Gil, Anne’s Gil, is back, and he’s making sure everyone knows it. You should see my face now.
The world needs more teachers - and women in general - like Miss Muriel Stacy.
Anne and Gil being aware of what exactly their relationship is like (Shouldn’t we be arguing about something…”) while not being sure what their relationship is like at all is… the most wonderful paradox I can think of right now. We’re getting a Shirbert kiss… in, like, season 6 or something, but it’s worth waiting for. Some slowburns should remain slowburns. 
The spelling… oh gods, the spelling! #Shirbert
When Anne mentioned Winifred, I couldn’t help thinking of that time she mentioned Ruby… why do you do this to the guy, Anne? He’s trying to take a step forward, I can see that he really is. 
Wait, what is happening? Why do they always make screens so dark, I can’t see what’s going on at all. 
Oh no! When Miss Stacy mentioned the building spontaneously combusting, I didn’t think that was foreshadowing… but then, if I remember correctly, a fire was what made Anne and Ruby friends, so we never know - something good might come out of this. I hope so.
To sum up, in this episode we saw: Anne’s actions and their disastrous outcome; the town isn’t ready to accept the changes that are happening inevitably; Billy is an a**hole, Prissy is an icon - no surprises in either situation; Diana is not Diana; Josie doesn’t realise she’s a victim and has a voice; all the girls except Anne suffer from what we over at TV tropes call Aesop Amnesia about Beltane; Derry’s second kiss was nothing like the first one; Gilbert is BACK; Ruby is me; this is NOT MY DIANA; Anne finds out about Derry in the worst way imaginable; Jerry suffers and I want to kill someone because of it; the fall of Diana and what seems like, but is hopefully not, the death of Anne and Diana’s friendship; Josie realises her worth and puts Billy in his place; Gilbert is back like he’s never been gone; rallying and organised action at its best; In Matthew We Trust; Josie is back for the better; Shirbert knowing their relationship and not knowing it at the same time; Anne mentions another girl yet again - some people never learn; Miss Stacy unknowingly predicted the fire.
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angstymarshmallow · 5 years ago
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The Wolf’s Heart; part eight - “marked as yours” N*FW (cal lowell x mc)
[a little note: I decided on a name...eight parts in. It’s cliche but honestly, this is all I have lol. AND NOW i HAVE TO UPDATE THEM ALL.Ahhhh This part was a joy and a pain to work on because it’s been awhile since I’ve written anything like this. If you aren’t comfortable with smut, then pass on this because there’s kind of a lot of that going on with how close they’ve grown to each other - even more so than before and I didn’t know if it was rough or enough or. Plus I’m touching on non-canon material that’s kinda influence in the book I’m writing on the side, you’ll see once you start reading. I’m going to stop babbling, I’m just anxiously going to leave this here. I always appreciate feedback and would love to know what people think!]
[words counted: 8210]
[summary: after rescuing Cal, they’ve finally had a moment to themselves for the talk. The Big One to decide whether or not they’ve got a future in NOLA together]
[part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven] 
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The rest of New York City feels very far away in comparison to the weight of Cal’s thoughts as he peers at the city’s skyline down below the nearly twenty story building. Technically, he knows it isn’t - he can jump and leap that in a simple bound and then some, but that wouldn’t change anything.
After he’d met and thank the people that helped Wren to rescue him, he’s been trying to come to terms with the past several hours - days. It’s been that long since he’s seen the outside world and although they’ve only been in the hotel for an hour; he’s itching for a run.
He presses his forehead against the cool surface for a moment. He needs to touch something, to convince himself he’s really here –  really alive and not dreaming up this place. He’s still not a hundred percent sure. He rubs his fingers along the glass, making a slight indent into it.
The bloodsuckers reassured him he could spend the night with Wren here; at least giving them some time to re-group, but all Cal can think about is what looms ahead. It’s not over, not in the slightest. Shaw over-played his hand by contacting Kavinsky, but Cal isn’t out of the woods yet. In his heart, he knows it.
It won’t be over as long as Shaw continues to threaten the livelihood of his pack. And he’ll be coming back home with zero solutions to deal with that colossal problem.
Shit.
The scent of her suddenly fills the room and the wolf in Cal snaps at attention at the diversion. Something in his chest twists, as he whirls around to spot Wren by the door, a hand on her hip and a small smile toying at the corner of her lips.
“A penny for your thoughts?”
He shakes his head, a small smile of his own lifting his cheeks as she crosses the room to stand in front of him. “For you? It’s always free.” Taking both her hands into his, he leans forward until he’s able to bump her forehead. “Have I mentioned how happy I am to see you? I almost can’t believe you’re here and not some kind of fever dream.” He squeezes her hands for emphasis and watches as a faint blush splays across her cheeks in response.
“Are you admitting that you actually dream about me?” Her smile transforms into a teasing smirk.
“Guilty as charged.” He pauses for a moment, swallowing past a sudden lump in his throat. “God, I missed you.” He never thought he’d see her again, and now here she is – standing right in front of him. Does he dare hope? Does he dare believe this really reality?
Her teasing smirk vanishes. Wren presses into him, and those dark eyes of hers’ turn uncharacteristically grows swiftly somber. “I missed you too.”
While remaining eye contact, she drops one of his hands. “You’re never allowed to do that to me again.” As if to drive her point home, she punches him on the shoulder. “I was worried shitless about you.”
“Woah!” He’s more surprised than he is hurt at the gesture and a huge part of him wants to kiss her, but the smarter part of him recognizes the telltale signs of Wren’s temper. His eyes search her face.
“You don’t get to do that to me, not anymore – we’re a team, Cal.” Her mouth snaps shut and then open again as she huffs a breath.
Cal thinks she’s fighting to say more without knowing how to say it. He waits a beat, resting a hand on her arm in support.
“Shit.” She swears again and runs her fingers through her hair. “I need to say this. I need to get this out before I start losing my mind.” She looks completely flustered.
That’s how he knows it’s something important – and the sudden intense look in her eyes definitely confirms that.
Relationship important. And it takes every bit of him not to coddle her to his chest. Every bit of his control not to tell her it’s okay – they don’t have to discuss it now, if she doesn’t want to.
“I love you Cal.” She says the words softly, staring up at him with a look of tenderness strong enough to make it hard for him to swallow. “And when Donny told me you were gone…it was probably one the scariest moments of my life.” She shakes her head, “no I definitely was, because no one at Wolf’s Den knew where you were.” Taking a deep breath, she makes a point of reaching for him as if she still can’t believe it herself that he’s really here either.
“I told myself I’d do anything to have you back, anything to look at you right now and tell you…” she trails off for a moment, her voice trembling with a sudden look of vulnerability in her eyes that makes Cal rest a protective arm around her waist. “And tell you –,” her voice shakes, “how much I love you. And that scares me. It scares the shit out of me, but it scares me more that I almost never got the chance to say it. And I’m not going to keep one foot in the door anymore Cal.”
“What are you saying Wren?” He has to hear her say it. He has to know that there is no going back for her anymore. For either of them. If they’re going to be together again, if she’s going to be apart of his life –
“I want to be your mate. The whole nine yards.” Her voice cracks but she says the words loudly and her eyes never waver from his. “I want to be your only partner – in the pack, in life – in everything. I want it all, but only with you.”
At first, Cal doesn’t speak. He doesn’t think he can. His entire body remains frozen on the spot as he stares down at her completely – loss for words. Slowly, the enormity of her words start to sink in.
“Uh…Cal?” She wets her lips. “You’re staring at me…and not saying anything.”
He’s never really seen her babble before, Wren isn’t the type. But it’s completely cute how she’s shifting on her feet and tugging on her arm as she suddenly starts rambling, Her eyes drift to the side, “– and it’s kinda freaking me out when I’ve just left my heart out here and I –”
Cal lets out a howl of joy, cutting off the rest of her sentence. He scoops her high inside his arms, grinning from ear-to-ear.
“Ooof. Down boy!” She fastens her legs around waist and her arms by his neck seconds later. “So, I take it – you’re happy…?”
“Happy?” Happy doesn’t even begin to cover how he feels. He chuckles in disbelief before swooping in to capture her slightly parted lips. And kissing her is like icing on the cake - he pours every ounce of his happiness into his kisses. Every ounce of love he can as their mouths meet, over and over again. “I’m beyond happy.” He murmurs against her lips, his ears perking at the sound of her moan. His tongue dart swiftly out to have a taste of her – sliding between half-parted lips.
When he manages to give them some breathing room, she’s smiling at him and there’s so much love in her eyes – that he doesn’t want to wait a second longer. Why should they after everything they’ve been through?
“I want to, tonight. Make you mine, I mean.” He speaks the words in a heated rush without thinking, gauging her reaction. “In every way possible – I want you to be my mate.”
Her eyes widen a little and for a moment Cal fears the worst. Maybe they need a little more time – he’s already gotten his answer.
But then she nods eagerly; her wavy hair shaking at the vigorous motion. “God Cal, yes. Please.”
“Are you sure?” He wants her to be sure, because once it’s done there’s no going back. At least not for him. When wolves mate – they mated for life.
“Yes, I’m sure. I know this is what I want, what I need.” Wren takes a breath and cups his cheek. “There’s no one else but you Cal, not for me. Not anymore.”
The conviction in her voice makes his heart swell with love and pride, because for him there isn’t anyone else either. Without uttering a response, Cal ambles confidently towards the foot of the bed. With a soft growl, he tosses her playfully onto the silken white sheets.
She lands lightly across it, gazing up at him with a look of unadultered hunger and affection in her eyes that makes his throat go dry.
“Well? What do I have to do?” Her brows wrinkle in that adorable way of hers’ when she’s momentarily confused by something. “Is this going to be….some kind of weird- cult shit?”
Cal barks out a laugh. Shaking his head in amusement, he responds. “No, it isn’t. I mean, it’s still magical but.” He stops for a moment, thinking of how little he knows about it. “I don’t even know if it’ll really work because you’re human.”
“Only half-human.” She reminds him, sitting up.
“Half-human.” He agrees, lifting his lips into a smile at the reminder. “But we’ll take it slow and figure it out together?”
“Mmm,” Wren tilts her head to the side, biting her lips in a way that causes a rush of heat towards his groin.
Fuck, she knows what it does to him when she does that.
“What if I don’t want to take it slow?” She slowly starts unbuttoning her shirt, button after button without taking her eyes off of him. “What if I want it rough and fast?” She shrugs the garment off. “What if I want you to make me beg for it?”
“Are you trying to test me?” Because he’s almost at his limit. Already, he’s able to sense the wolf’s patience waning – shivering in anticipation of claiming her completely. She doesn’t realize yet, but she’s playing a dangerous game.
“Maybe.” She smiles coyly at him. “Is it working?”
He watches her strip-tease with half-hooded eyes.
He’s hooked on where her hands travel; between the valley of her supple breasts, down the length of her abs until disappearing between her shapely thighs - wishing it were his fingers instead that draws a low hum of pleasure from her throat.
Damn, it’s definitely working.
Grinning wolfishly at her, Cal captures one of her ankles and with deliberate slowness, hauls her towards the foot of the bed. “I think you already know the answer to that.”
“But I want to hear you say it.” Her eyes challenge him and lips that slightly part invitingly as the bed suddenly dips from the shift of weight.
She doesn’t know what she’s really asking – for him to lose control over the wolf. Even as much as he trusts her, he doesn’t know if he can trust that part of himself not to hurt her, and the last thing he’s ever wanted to do is hurt her.
The room’s been quiet for almost too long.
“I trust you.” She says softly as if reading his thoughts.
Her touch across his cheek settles some of his unease. He nuzzles his face into her palm, inhaling her familiar scent. His pulse skyrockets as she jerks his chin towards her.
“I trust you completely Cal.”
Cal exhales harshly, letting most of his worries drift away from her insistent touch. She trusts him completely. He’s never had anyone trust him like this – not with this part of himself, the part he’s accustomed to having to hide in past relationships. Although she’s come close, more than once this – this is different.
This is giving the wolf complete control. This is letting nature run its course and magic taking the reins of their fate, of their future.
The bed creaks again as Cal presses one knee and then the other on either side of her hips. His left-hand trails across her chest, pausing to run soft circles across nipples.
She sucks in a breath.
Smiling to himself, he drifts his hand a little lower while slowly pushing her back – taking his time to guide her movements, until her naked back lands softly against the silken sheets. His massive frame looms atop her; still hovering and bracing without allowing much of his weight to entrap her completely.
“What are you staring at?” She says after a moment of silence. Her eyes shoot up in question and Cal shakes his head.
“Just admiring how beautiful you are,” his hands frame her face as she breaks out into a smile. God, she’s breathtaking.
“You’re the one to talk.”
When she lifts a hand to tangle in his hair, he stops her. “Mmm.” A low rumble escapes his throat as he grabs her wrist and holds it high within the air. His nails are almost too long to be completely human anymore and they bite into her flesh. “Not tonight, not for this.”
Her eyes light up unexpectedly.
Neither speaks as the bed emits another soft squeak at the shift of weight. Inch by inch disappears between them as Cal lowers himself until his lips skim the base of her neck. “I’m in complete control tonight.”
-
Wren releases another rush of air as she feels Cal’s mouth hovering by one of her most sensitive spots. It takes all her willpower to resist the urge to reach for him, to drag her fingers in his hair and yank him closer. But she has a feeling he won’t let her. Not tonight.
Instead, she fights the temptation with a barely concealed moan and shuts her eyes. She listens to the sound of his breathing, the gentle pressure of his lips as they press a kiss where her pulse flutters in excitement.
Another low rumble fills the air.
His lips travel down the length of her collarbone, its languid pace threatens her heart into palpations as they dip between her breasts and nip her tender flesh.
She shivers.
His sharp teeth graze her nipple – one and then the other, biting gently while her own breathing turns ragged.
“Look at me.”
His voice has always had its edges, raw – honest. Even in its softest moments, there have been parts of it that’s never lost some of what she suspects as the wolf. But hearing him now; there’s almost no hint of that softness left.
When her eyes flutter back open, Wren barely manages to stifle a gasp.
His aren’t their normal colour anymore. They’re a soul-scorching amber glow, the telltale signs of his other half fighting for control.  But he’s not fighting it. He’s letting it happen. And a silent thrill runs through her at the knowledge.
His tongue darts out as he nuzzles the side of his face into her skin. “Mine,” he says the word emphatically, expelling a breath before continuing to lick a path down her body; past her lower abdomen.
And her stomach seizes in anticipation for more.
When his lips find her center, Wren’s back nearly arches off the bed.
“Every part of you is mine.” His hands drop to pull her thighs wider apart from each other. Shooting her a grin, he buries his head in between them and blows a cool breath of air across her clit that causes another shiver to travel along the base of her spine.
“Cal –”
The moment his tongue touches her heat, the rest of her sentence turns into a cry of pleasure.
He isn’t gentle. No. Not this time.
His tongue expertly latches onto her, pushing through tender her folds with a sudden feverous intent that has her fighting to keep still. All she can do is toss her head back and moan as he drives his tongue in and out of her pussy, without pause – without giving her a chance to breathe.
His tongue knows exactly how to drive her wild, how to push her limits of what she can and cannot handle. From its long strokes against her swollen clit, to nipping when she least expects it - it’s almost too intense – too much, to the point where she’s clenching the sheets to keep herself from reaching for him. And when she feels the sharp edge of his teeth placing more pressure on her clit, her mind almost threatens to see stars.
Oh my god.
He’s never been like this before.
Wren sucks in a breath. Her hips shift a little off the bed as he continues his relentless pursuit of her orgasm, sucking her clit – nipping every so often at her most sensitive spot, until finally slipping a finger inside to stretch her.
Oh god.
Wren has to bite down her lip hard as another two digits slip joins in, pushing deeply despite her sudden flinch at their intrusive entrance. With three digits roughly thrusting inside her heat, they spike her heartbeat even higher as the sound of her wet excitement fills the air. Her hands loosen around the sheets. She tries to grip the back of his head, but a moment after touching him – his free hand firmly twists hers’ away and pins it back into place.
He’s going faster now, as if to match the pattern of her own erratic heartbeat still racing inside her chest. His fingers move at a speed so fluid that her legs have started to shake.
“Cal,” she cries out his name as her orgasm hits, like a wave that’s been brewing a storm – it crashes into her with such ferocity that her hips completely leave the bed. She tries to twist away – her sensitivity suddenly too much to keep him between her legs.
But Cal slips his fingers out at the same second and she struggles to move as he laps every bit of her excitement on his tongue. He braces her against the canopy bed to prevent her escape. When he finally pulls back to give her a little breathing room, his amber-coloured eyes watches her in the dim light. “You’re so beautiful.”
Without taking his eyes off her, he sniffs his fingers. “I love your smell.” He takes one finger into his mouth at a time, licking them clean. “Fuck, I love your taste.”
A whimper escapes her throat at the gesture. God, if she didn’t think he could get any hotter before, well – she’s pretty sure she’d combust on the spot any minute now if he stops.
Wren sits up, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him close enough to taste herself on his lips. She catches his lower lip between her teeth and bites hard enough to draw blood. He moans low in his throat and the sound makes her stomach flip.
Breaking their kiss, Cal rakes his fingers across her naked back.
It stings. His nails are sharp but there’s a lingering pleasure behind the pain.
“Swear it to me.” A single sharpened nail – long enough to prick her chin lifts her chin up. “Swear that you’re mine and no one else’s underneath the stars tonight.”
There’s no hesitation. He has her – soul, mind and body. “I swear I am yours and yours alone.” She gazes up at him, watching the flecks of gold glow brighter than ever before as he dips his head low and emit another growl.
The words feel right, everything feels right.
Except the moment Wren says them, a stinging sensation from where he’s marked her is suddenly all she can feel, all she can think about despite the living and breathing perfect specimen of a man right in front of her. Whatever endearments of love she’s thought of, quickly evaporates from her mind and she reels her head back in surprise. The pain isn’t just a light stab anymore – it’s more of a pulsing feeling that starts from her back where he’s undoubtedly staked her as his claim, until it ebbs deeply within her core.
She struggles to keep her focus on Cal.
What’s going on –
It’s as though he’s burned her, and any minute now she’ll smell the scent of her own flesh igniting itself as she finches back. Her hands move to quickly find the spot – but he’s faster.
-
Cal captures her hands and pulls them to rest against his hard chest as he lets out a hiss of pain. The mark goes both ways. He doesn’t just feel his pain; he feels hers too – down to the very core of his fucking soul.
Shit, does it always hurt this much for everyone?
Still, he can’t show weakness. It’s not what she needs right now. He can’t show a slither of how much it’s destroying him. She needs him, needs reassurance that she’ll be okay, that mating the right way will work. So, Cal doesn’t allow his gaze to waver. He doesn’t scream every curse word he can think of into existence. He merely bites his tongue against the hot flashes of pain still wracking his entire body.
This is what it means to be mated.
He endures the scorching fire within his blood. It’ll be gone soon enough. He only has to wait for it to pass. The wolf yelps but doesn’t falter either.
Minutes passes until he hisses at its impatience.
He wants to claim what’s rightfully his now that they’ve started. And he’ll let the wolf – only after allowing her proper time to adjust to all this. This is after all, new for them both even if his instincts are making it hard to keep his focus.
When his mate finally stops shaking, Cal draws his attention back to her lips; back to the curves of her well-toned body. When she starts trembling again – it isn’t because of pain. No, it’s with a new kind of feeling. Need. Painful need. He can almost taste it; her desire to mate - her sex quivering with the undeniable urge to join him.
It practically has him salivating.
He swallows it back.
“Cal, Cal I need you.” The words seem to tumble out, even surprising her. And her eyes flicker from their usual dark brown to nearly an identical colour.
And holy fuck does he need her. He needs to be inside her so fucking much that there aren’t any words to describe it. He can scarcely even breathe at how irresistible she suddenly seems in front of him – more than she’s ever been before; with her half-bruised lips from their kisses, tousled dark hair around her shoulders and dilated pupils of faint-amber. He’s completely aware of her pheromones warping the atmosphere around them. This is deeper than just lust, and love. It’s like a primal urge just to bend her over and fuck her senseless.
Claim her. Claim her.
Resting his palms on either side of her waist, he yanks her forward until the tip of his cock lightly teases the entrance of her mound.
When she moans, his cock twitches at the sound. “Beg for it.”
“Ah – what?” She pants, eyes clouded.
“Beg.”
He’d have to thank the universe later for the little self-control he’s had left to speak, but for right now – all he can concentrate on is the heat radiating off of her, off of him. And the heady look of lust on his mate’s face. But he’ll wait, he’ll wait as long he has to.
“You’re serious?”
“Beg.” The word comes out as a growl.
“I want you to fuck me Cal.” She drawls out the words, tilting her chin up – meeting his gaze head-on. “I need you to fuck me, so…so fucking bad. Please Cal. Make me yours.”
And it’s all the begging he needs.
Uttering a growl, Cal guides his length inside her - one inch at a time.
At first, Wren can’t speak. She bites down on her lower lip.
A familiar rush of pleasure fills him as her fingernails dig into his broad shoulders. What’s left of his self of control finally snaps as he hikes her legs around his lean waist and increasingly buries more of himself inside her sloppiningly wet heat.
He doesn’t spare more than few seconds for her to adjust once he’s down to the hilt, before he drives his hips forward. The bed creaks loudly at the motion and her own cry of pleasure encourages his burning need to fuck her – to really fuck her.
He recedes out of her slick entrance and then slams into her.
She digs her nails harder into his skin and fingers that have begun to feel more like claws press intimately into his flesh.
It’s enough to draw blood.
He slams into her again. And again. And again. Each time he does, her breath hitches until he can barely hear her over the loud smacking of their bodies - crashing into one another with frenzied urgency.
Mine. Mine. Mine.
The word echoes inside his head like an infinite loop that only seems to grow stronger each time he thrusts his entire cock deep within her. It isn’t just about how much he loves her, it’s about the constant need to stretch her as much as he can, to fill her completely with his seed and hear her scream his name to the universe.
His hips jerk with such ferocity that she topples back and he goes with her, pounding with enough roughness for the board to splinter as the headboard clatters heavily against the wall. It doesn’t deter him. His goal is single-minded; solely on making her shatter beneath him and when she thinks she’s had enough – he’d do all over again.
Her own momentum can’t keep up and quite quickly, Cal’s thrust become wild and erratic enough to send Wren over the edge. He feels her inner walls tighten around his shaft and he expels a harsh breath as her entire body convulses all at once.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” She continues to let out a string of curses as she throws her head back, eyes stinging with something close to tears as she shudders again.
God, even watching her come apart does something crazy to him. It makes his heart race, makes the wolf inside him puff in satisfaction that he’s able to satisfy his mate so completely. But he’s far from finished, in fact he’s famished for more.  And it isn’t until the tremors stop that he flips her over, guiding her closer to the center of the bed as the wolf snaps his impatience.
She doesn’t need to ask; his desire for her must work both ways too. Something in her body seems to respond automatically to his urges, and she shoots him a mischievous grin over her shoulder, before offering her smooth back to him.
She’s so sexy.
There’s his mark there too. Spirals that twirl together to make an insignia matching the one undoubtedly on his shoulder where’s marked him as her own. He stifles a groan at the sight and nudges her forward with a jerk of his hips, until she’s balanced on all fours. Her palms dig into the sheets, tearing the fabric as he sinks into her again.
Fuck. She’s exquisite. She’s perfect. She’s his.
His thrusts are jerky, uncontrolled. There’s no stopping him, not when he’s so close. He can’t help but be rough, nails raking angry marks across her thighs and hips as he keeps thrusting maddeningly fast into her. Here inside the safety of this room - he’s not just Cal anymore and she’s not just Wren either. This is bigger than the both of them and he surrenders himself to the passion, surrenders himself to the pain.
He presses his chest into her back, inhaling their sweaty mix. More. More.  He’s desperate to find his release – desperate to fill her completely with his come. He nicks the nape of her neck again with his sharpened teeth, biting down hard as she cries out his name.
Her hands grip the headboard as his pacing grows more erratic, more fevered until the bed shakes from the sheer intensity of their fucking. 
Without thinking, one of his hands finds the supple arch of her throat. He can almost hear it. Her pulse flutter in excitement when his grip tightens. He feels the exact moment when she let’s go. Her body convulses into intense shudders that fuels his orgasm. Uttering a string of curses as burrows his face into the crook of her neck as his body starts to shake, emptying himself inside her until he’s completely spent.
When he’s finally able to move again, Cal rolls over and takes her with him. She tucks herself at his side as he stares happily at the ceiling.
God, that was…..there’s really no way he can describe it
He listens to the sound of their heartbeats. They’re both still keyed to speak.
Woah. Is it like this for everyone?
“Wow.” Wren breaks the silence first, grinning up at him. There are flashes of exhaustion within her eyes when he peers at her. He’s worried he’s broken her for a moment until she threads her fingers through his chest hair and lets out a contented sigh.
“I know.” He blows stray strands of his now matted and wet hair away from his face, before staring back down at her. She’s never looked quite so messy and tired before. He likes the look on her.
“You were really holding out on me, huh?” She has the galls to arch her eyebrows at him and he laughs at the gesture.
“Maybe.” He tries to play it off, but his cheeks give him away. They always do. “I just…I never wanted to risk hurting you.” He runs his fingers through his hair, glancing bashfully at anywhere except directly at her.
“Uh huh. I’m not so breakable Cal.” He feels her fingers, still coated with sweat turn his chin. “But if you weren’t convinced before, maybe this will convince you now.” She presses a soft kiss to his jaw.
There’s still a faint amber-light to her eyes when she pulls back, and seeing it makes him so damn happy. He breaks out into a wide grin. “No, I can be as rough as I want now.” His words drop an octave, husky enough for her eyes to slide meaningfully down his hip.
Wren whistles. “God, I really thought you had stamina before but now.” She traces hand across his naked hip and the touch makes the tip of his shaft twitch. “Now, I definitely know what stamina is, I still feel like I could maybe go for another round or two.”
A low rumble escapes his throat. “I can’t help it. It’s what you do to me, and it’s the wolf that’s never truly sated.” He captures her hand and kisses her wrist before giving it a gentle squeeze. “But that can wait. When’s the last time you slept?”
Wren avoids his eyes. “Maybe a day or two.” She winces. “To be fair though, I was trying to find you.”
“I’m not going to argue with that. I just want you to take care of yourself, and I’m honestly beat.” He exhales sharply, closing his eyes for a moment and then stares back up at the ceiling. In all his wildest dreams – he didn’t think today would have ended the way it did and he flinches at the memory of being trapped.
If it wasn’t for her – he didn’t think he would have survived.
Wren scoots closer. Her warmth is a welcoming presence that breaks the prison of memories still flooding the gates of his mind. “I’m really glad you’re all in one piece, I can only imagine what that asshole put you through.”
Cal is hyperaware of her uncertainty. Even if she doesn’t ask – he can still feel it. Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it? And maybe one day, he will. However, for now – he’s perfectly fine with shoving the memories as far back as he can keep them. He won’t let them ruin everything tonight.
“It doesn’t matter.” Dropping a kiss by her brow, he sighs. “I’m here – you’re here, that’s what matters.”
“Mm.”
“Is that you letting this go without me having to ask?” He almost has to do a double-take.
“Hey! I let things go sometimes!”
He snorts.
“Okay – well,” she huffs out a breath. “Stubbornness runs in my blood but I’m not stupid enough not to see you’ve been through a lot.” She hesitates. “I can feel it radiating off of you in waves, and we don’t have to talk about it until you’re ready.”
“Good.” He sighs in relief. God, he loves her for it. “I love you,” he whispers, shutting his eyes close.
“I love you too.” He feels her sharp teeth graze his side, “now shut up and let us get some sleep.”
-
Everything hurts.
Her arms, her legs – every part of her body seems to be completely worn out as the events of last night comes rushing back to her- as vivid as if she’s still there herself. The fight with Kavinsky. Finding Cal. Mating. Her cheeks colour at the latest memory. Last night had been intense, however it doesn’t take long for her mind to switch gears.
There’s too much going on at one time for it not to.
Even worse, Wren’s entire body aches as if she’s been hit by a truck and suffering the worst parts of a hungover because of it. The slightest flicker of movements she takes to sit up in bed causes an after-effect and she flinches at the stabs of pain. There’s no getting rid of it.
It isn’t the room. The room is blissfully quiet. It’s everything outside the room. Her hearing is better than it’s ever been before; picking up things she didn’t think possible. The whispers out in the hall from the people she’s only just met, suddenly sounds more like shouting.
“Do you think they’re going to get up anytime soon?” Harlow’s voice sounds filled of concern.
A snort sounding as if it belongs to Lily. “After hearing them last night – not likely.”
“Man. They were so loud.”
“You’re the one to talk Jax. You and Harlow have been waay louder in the past –”
Hissing, Wren clutches her temples as she tries to drone them out – desperate for silence. It’s no use. She can’t drone them out. They’re all she can focus on.
Shit.
Her eyes prick with tears as she takes a deep breath; her nose abruptly picking up the musky scents of sweat and sex mingled all into one. She realizes with a jolt – her senses haven’t just gotten better – they’re damned-well oversensitive to her current environment. And she hates it.
Crying out in pain, Wren rocks back and forth until strong arms suddenly encircle her. She’s cocooned into his hard chest and more aware than ever of his body heat, pressing intimately into her as she feels his breath by her ear.
“Sssh, it’s okay. Just focus on me. Focus on my voice.” His voice which by the way – sounded incredibly smooth. “Tune everything else out.”
Taking a ragged breath, Wren tries to concentrate on Cal and Cal alone.
Minutes pass as they remained locked like this; with Cal humming into her ear and Wren trying desperately to keep her attention solely on him. It’s difficult. She’s never had to fight quite like this to remain focus before, but eventually the voices in the hall become a dull ache that’s moved to the back of her brain.
Oh, thank god.
Twisting inside Cal’s arms, she gives him a smile short of nothing but her relief. “You have no idea how much I needed that.”
“I think I do,” his frown creases his brow as he lifts his fingers to rub her temples. “I was a pup once.”
The gesture helps to soothe her and she releases another sigh, leaning into his hands. “Please tell me this gets better, or at least easier.” Letting out a string of curses, she closes his eyes and forces her attention on his breathing.
He laughs.
She winces.
“Sorry.” At least he sounds apologetic about it. “It doesn’t; you’ll just be able to handle it better. You’ll adjust your attention on the things you want to focus on.” He smiles a little to himself, “but this is kinda cute in a way.”
She shoots him a glare that would make lesser men flinch and scramble to get away. But to Cal, it only serves to make his smile grow wider. “How the hell is any of this cute?”
“You just –” he shakes his head, “kinda remind me of Donny when he was a pup. He was pretty much oversensitive to almost everything for a while when he hit fourteen.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.”  She grumbles. Besides, Donny was a child when he’d reach peak werewolf physiology – she’s a grown ass woman, and all she wants to do is curl into a ball and disappear underneath all these sheets.
He drops his fingers and plants a kiss by her temple. “It wasn’t supposed to.”
“You’re the worst.”
“I thought Donny was the worst.” He quips back.
“No, he comes a close second now…” She hesitates, expelling a short sigh as her eyes flutter back open to stare at him. “He misses you too.”
Cal’s jaw tightens. “I can’t believe I left him alone like that.”
“It wasn’t your fault.” She interjects before he’s able to place anymore blame on himself. She knows how easy it is for him to spiral when it comes to Donny. Mumbling softly, she bumps his forehead in comfort. “You didn’t know any of this was going to happen.”
“Still, I was careless.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “If I hadn’t come to New York alone – .”
“But you did. You were cocky and dumb enough to think Kavinsky hadn’t told Shaw.” She isn’t going to sugarcoat the mess they’re in to make him feel better. They always tell each other the hard-truths, and the hard-truth is – Cal fucked up and things could have gone a lot worse if they hadn’t found him. But, she doesn’t want to focus on that. They’re here, they’re together - that’s what matters. 
“And whatever comes next, I’m with you.” She tries to make a joke, “for a better or worse right?”
When Cal suddenly pulls away, Wren eyes narrow into almost slits.
He looks…guilty. She can almost feel it, it’s starting to practically envelop the room. “Hey,” she turns completely, ignoring the twinges of pain from the sudden motion of her legs shifting to rest on either sides of his waist. “I wanted this, and you have nothing to feel guilty about.” She bumps his forehead affectionately; the way he does to get her attention. “I love you, and I’m sure…it’ll get better.” She gives him a smile, “it’s like you said – it takes time.”
Cal watches her a moment longer before expelling a deep sigh.
“C’mon, you’re pulling down the mood.”
“Oh?” The corner of his lips twitch as Wren rakes him with a once over – lingering on the lower half of his body, before slowly trailing up again. “And what exactly is the mood?”
“The mood is - I’m very aware of what’s going on down here. Right now.” She nudges her hips forward by an inch as she says it. It’s enough to brush the tip of his cock and almost reflexively, he lets out a loud hiss.
Grinning, Wren does it again – only this time, his hands come up to splay across her back. She can almost taste his desire on her tongue the moment she leans forward and captures his lips. It’s so potent that it fills the room. She isn’t having any troubling focusing on him anymore – he’s all she can think about.
Wren bites down hard and she’s rewarded with a growl as his fingers rake a path down her back “And I for one, want to take full advantage of this.” Her stomach is already curling in anticipation for him as he kisses her roughly on the lips.
His chocolate brown eyes flash with sudden heat just as the palm of her hand pushes him back. She shifts her position to straddle him as he lands comfortably atop of their sheets.
“You know we’ll have to leave this room eventually.” His hands drift towards her hips, staring momentarily down at the marks he’s left from last night.
She sneaks a glance at them as well, and then back up at him as she slowly lowers herself onto his throbbing member. “Maybe, but for now - I’m suddenly feeling ravenous.”
He shifts hips hip with enough subtle force for her to moan at the sudden friction.
God, how is it that he feels so good? So right. Everything always does with him and it’s a wonder it’s taken her this long to realize he’s the only person that belongs in her heart. The only person that has her completely.
She entwines their fingers together as she begins to move her hips forward back and in earnest, dictating their space to a much slower rhythm than last night. All her senses are very aware of all of him, the way his muscles tense and bunch together, the way his eyes can’t seem to take themselves off of her – down to the slight intakes of breath he takes as his eyes transition into that scorching hot amber.
When he tries to move his hips faster, her fingers dig into his palms. “Let me.” Her words are husky, but Cal wordlessly arches a brow before he slows down and Wren hides her grin. He’s giving her complete control of their pleasure.
She rolls her hips – remaining steady eye contact with Cal as his gaze turns smoldering.
“Fuck, you’re killing me here Wren.” He drops her hands to grip her waist.
“Good.” She can feel his impatience budding again, the wolf in her is basking in every minute of it. But he hasn’t tried anything again yet. Smirking, she rolls her hip again – biting down on her lip to stop herself from moaning at how good he feels.
Cal swears, his nails turning sharp as they dig into her sides. His breath is almost ragged, and his cheeks are heavily flushed when she finally starts to pick up speed. “Oh god, you feel so fucking good.” The rest of his words turns into a cry of pleasure when she squeezes herself around his length.
“Mm, you like that?’
His response is in the way he thrusts his hips to meet hers’ – with wild abandon, and suddenly her little game of keeping control is forgotten.
Her hips match him pace for pace and it doesn’t take much longer for the bed to start creaking again.
His hands grip her tighter as she brings her hips up and then down on him again, keeping a loose hand clenched around the bed sheets for gripping as their pleasure comes altogether. And the passion that builds between them is bigger than just her - it’s hers and his blissfully jumbled into one.
She can’t think, she can’t breathe. There’s only just the primal urge to keep up with his thrusts, to reach the peak of how much she ca handle and a natural surrender of all her inhibitions as their gazes stay completely on each other.
When they scale to the very top, they ride it out going down to the bottom together. Collapsing into each other’s arms, endearments of I-love-yous as they tumble into the sheets, yanking them around each other like a cocoon as their bodies still slicked with heat and love bask in the aftermath of their love.
-
By the time they’ve left their room, it’s shy past five in the afternoon.
Maybe if Wren hadn’t just the best morning in her life, she’d care a lot more. But right now, the only concern Wren has is how much she wants to stuff her face with any food they can find as she leads Cal towards the kitchen of the hotel room.
They both freeze just in time to notice their other companions clearing out. There’s a bunch of small suitcases by the door and they’re all dressed in fresh clothes of slacks and shirts - smelling distinctively of vanilla bodywash.
Six pairs of eyes remain rooted to their spot.
At first – no one says anything. It’s quiet enough for a pin to comically drop.
Wren jerks her chin up, daring anyone to say anything.
Lily is the first to break the awkward silence, furrowing her brows before letting out an expletive. “Shit, it’s about damn time. We were starting to think you two were never going to leave.” She places a hand on her hip. “Check out time was like three hours ago.”
Cal clears his throat; his cheeks abruptly turning more than a shade darker thank his skin as Wren mutters a stiff apology. Okay, so she definitely gets where they’re coming from. Not only did they miss out on karaoke – they’ve been pretty MIA in general and this morning - that’s mostly been her fault. “Sorry guys, we’ll uh – pay the difference.”
“It’s fine, Adrian has already taken care of it.” Harlow responds quickly, elbowing Lily sharply in the side. “What I think my friend meant to say is, we thought we wouldn’t get the chance to say goodbye.” She smiles, “it was a pleasure meeting you both despite the circumstances.”
Wren takes a few hesitant footsteps further into the common area, almost dragging Cal behind her. “I think that’s supposed to be my line. Seriously – thank you for all your help, and for putting up with us last night.” She adds before thinking better of it, “I would have probably still been searching the rest of New York for him.”
“Thank you for rescuing me.” Cal squeezes Wren’s hand as he regards the vampires with a slight nod.
Adrian inclines his head. “You’re quite welcome.” He reaches for the door and then pauses to peer back at them. “Would you mind passing down a message to Nik –” he gestures to them both with a flick of wrist, “tell him we’re even.”
“You bet.”
“Good. Well, I believe we’ve all gotten what we came here for.” Kamilah wastes no time to say goodbye; already stepping past the threshold of the door to find the elevator.
“Hey bloodsuckers,” Cal speaks up before they can all leave. Wren arches one critical eyebrow and he bites his bottom lip before adding. “Uh - if you’re ever in NOLA – look us up. You think it’s crazy over here? This has got nothin’ on us.”
Wren snorts in agreement. They’ve got no idea just how crazy it is up there.
Harlow and Jax share a look. “We’ll keep that in mind. Don’t forget to lock up before heading to the lobby.” With a parting smile, Harlow follows the rest of them out.
As the door slams shut again, Wren waits a few beats for their footsteps to fade before turning to Cal. “I like them.”
“I guess they’re alright, for bloodsuckers at least.”
She smacks his shoulder.
“Ah!” Chuckling, he snatches her hand before she’s able to punch him a second time and kisses the inside of her wrist. “I’m kidding, they’re alright – for anyone.”
“Good.” A crooked smile flits across her face, then falters into a frown as her stomach growls. “Okay, seriously – I’m really starving. What is up with that?”
He shoots her a bemused smile. “We did burn a lot of calories in that room.”
Another playful smack on his shoulder.
“But it’s also a wolf thing.”
“Ugh, figures.” Rolling her eyes, she snorts. “We should check-out and grab something on the way to the airport then. Ooh,” her eyes abruptly lit-up at a sudden idea. “Maybe this room came with a complimentary breakfast. Adrian seems like the type.”
-
The ride back to the airport is short but Cal feels tense about it the entire drive. Now that he’s going back without a plan, the enormity of what’s awaiting him in NOLA rests uneasily on his shoulders.
After Wren fills him in on how much he’s missed – he’s honestly just a bunch of knots and for the first time since becoming alpha; he doesn’t know where he stands with his pack. It was reckless for him to leave and foolish too. Wren’s been right to mock his choice.
Sighing, he closes his eyes for a moment and rakes his fingers through his hair. What the hell is he supposed to do now?
“Hey,” he hears the reassurance in her voice before he opens them back to shift his attention to her.
“I won’t lie to you and say it’ll be okay, because when I left – it wasn’t okay.” Wren takes a deep breath, reaching for his hand to give it a comforting squeeze. “But I’m here for you – and,” she visibly swallows, “for the pack. Whatever comes next, we’ll face it together.”
Cal nods once, forcing a smile as he squeezes her hand back. “I hope you’re right.” He has a feeling if he doesn’t find a solution, soon there won’t be any pack left to protect.
-
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doubledeaky · 6 years ago
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yes, hi, i would like to put in a request for deaky trying to help you with homework cause im big dumb and he's big smart !! but reader keeps getting distracted by how BEAUTIFUL HIS HANDS ARE and wouldn't it be lovely to FEEL THEM !!!!! (from deakyfordays ! ily !!!)
Ok hell yes I love you @deakyfordays , smut below the cut my guys!
Ok, so it’s Sunday and you called John in tears begging him to help you with your calculus homework which happened to be due the very next day. 
And he’s like “Very typical of you to leave it to the very last minute.” 
And he laughs and you groan in frustration and say “Are you gonna come help me or not.” 
And he’s like “I’m almost out the door.” And hangs up. And you’re like thank fuck for John Deacon.
So, he gets to your little old apartment with an armful of notebooks, pencils, and the ugly calculus book the teacher insisted the class buy. And he’s all smiley, one because he loves math, two because he likes helping people, and three because he loves seeing your pretty face. You’re so overcome with gratitude that you nearly knock him over with a hug the minute he walks through the door. He’s like so surprised but still tries to hug back without dropping all of his stuff because hugs from you are so precious to him and he cherishes them so much.
So, you sit him down at the couch and his eyes widen at the huge pile of notes, several empty coffee mugs, and worn textbook sat at the table. You feel a bit embarrassed by the mess but brush it off because a passing grade in this class is all that matters to you, that and how close John is sitting next to you on your ugly green couch. 
After about a minute of composing himself after that hug, John looks over to you and asks what you’re struggling with and you laugh humorlessly and say “Everything.”
He knows you’re over-exaggerating because you’re a lot smarter than you think but he grins sympathetically nevertheless. So you both agree to review the entire chapter and the minute he starts writing down example problems your mind is anywhere but calculus. 
Your eyes cannot look away from his hands. You can see the tendons beneath the skin shifting with each movement of the pencil in his hands. You can see the prominent blue veins come in and out of sight as he grips and releases the pencil. You’re damn near drooling, but cannot stop yourself from imagining how his hands would feel on your skin. The calloused pads of his fingers, the cool metal of his rings. Despite yourself, you feel a heat grow in your lower belly and you shift uncomfortably in your seat. This doesn’t go unnoticed by John and he looks over to you with furrowed brows. His lower lip in in between his teeth and it doesn’t help the current situation your in.
“You doing okay?” He asks, cocking an arched brow in question, lips quirking into an almost mocking grin.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.” You huff, trying to circulate air back into your lungs. He just nods, still a bit confused at your change in demeanor but continues writing nevertheless.
You’re immediately distracted again. You’re mind easily wanders as your eyes flit over his frame. He looks so unbelievably soft, his hair falling in brown waves over his shoulders, his jumper a size too big, his foot is tapping rhythmically against the hardwood, his face drawn in concentration but still characteristically John. But then his hands, those damned hands.
Your mind is your own worst enemy at the moment, creating images of John’s hand in less than innocent situations. Laced through your hair, gripping your jaw, brushing against your throat, cupping your breasts, and maybe even…
“You are definitely not paying attention.” John suddenly says, tossing his pencil down as he does. Your eyes snap open and your breath hitches in your throat. You cough, ready to defend yourself despite knowing John would see right through it. Your face falls and you feel your cheeks heat up, you look down and bite the skin of your lower lip. John’s grinning, knowing he’s caught you red-handed. 
“Sorry, just distracted.” You mumble, still not looking up.
“By what?” He asks, laughing before crossing his arms over his chest and you swear you can see the muscles in his upper arms tense. You gulp, trying to find any other thing in the room besides his hands to excuse your lack of attention. 
“Um, I was thinking about some other assignments I have to do.” You lie, right through those pearly whites of yours.
“Yeah, right.” You knew he’d never fall for it; you’ve never been a good liar, especially when it comes to John. You shift again in your seat, crossing your legs over one another to try and relieve the pressure between your thighs. John raises his brows and shifts in his own seat, his eyes momentarily flit over your exposed thighs before he chastises himself for thinking about you in such an inappropriate manner.
“Well, what’s got you so worked up?” He asks, taking sip from the glass of water in the other end of the coffee table. You really want to say “Your fucking hands, you idiot,” but you restrain yourself and just give him a shrug. He seems unconvinced and scoots closer to you and you can’t help but feel vulnerable under his questioning gaze. 
“You know you can’t lie to me so, you might as well tell the truth.” He says, smug grin included. You huff, and rub your red hot face to alleviate the growing intensity and cool off. 
“Fine, it’s… your hands.” You mumble, barely audible and John looks confused. 
“What was that?” He laughs, bringing a hand up to cup his ear. You groan, huffing a breath and then inhaling slowing.
“Your hands.” You say clearing and very blunt with almost no emotion in your voice. John is stunned and he feels a very similar heat to yours grow in his belly. 
“My…my hands.” He stutters, eyes wide as he takes you in, his throat going dry. 
“Yes, you’re fucking hands.” You huff, burying your face in a nearby throw pillow. Your skirt rides up ever so slightly and all air leaves John lungs when he catches a fleeting glimpse of your underwear. 
“W-why?” He asks, still obviously dumfounded. You shy and sit up, adjusting your sweater as you do, trying to mask your hardening nipples.
“They’re…nice.” You say simply, reaching over John’s lap to sip out of the same glass of water and he nearly faints when your chest brushes over his upper thighs.
“They’re..nice?” He asks, smile growing along with his ego. No girl had ever said that about his hand but he was glad the words were falling from your lips.
“Yeah, any girl with sense can appreciate a nice pair of hands.” You say, internally groaning as you realized the words that just came out of your mouth. 
“Oh, really? Why is that?” He asks smugly, already knowing the answer.
“Don’t make me say it.” You huff, cheeks growing impossibly hot. His smirk only grows wider and he gestures for you to continue. You frown but some evil force seems to be coercing you to indulge John in every fantasy you’ve hand involving his hands.
“Well, you know. They’re nice to hold and kiss and…other stuff.”
 “Like?” John questions, waving his hand, gesturing for you to elaborate. You swallow hard, the heat in your stomach growing unbearable. John is loving the way your writhing in your seat but he’s about ten seconds away from grabbing a pillow and placing it over his lap.
“God, you’re the worst. You know what I’m talking about.” You nearly scream, the knowing smirk on his face only making you angrier. 
“I don’t think I do.” He says, in a mocking tone, smile definitely making his cheeks sore at how wide it was. He always loved to tease you, but he was being cruel now especially since he figured he’d never see you like this again. So, he was collecting as much as he could. 
“You know, like, other stuff. Running through your hair, over your lips, your jaw. Maybe even your neck.” You were losing yourself in the moment, but John didn’t mind. If anything, he was silently begging you to continue. 
“I like when they run over my chest and my tummy and..” You stopped yourself, suddenly realizing you were revealing deep rooted fantasy about your best friend, to your best friend. He didn’t seem to mind though, eyes dark as he drank in your flustered appearance. He scooted closer, but you didn’t notice, too entranced by the look he was giving you. 
“Sorry, that’s gross.” You say, beyond embarrassed now and just ready to give up on homework and call it a day.
“No, no, it’s not. We all have likes and dislikes.” He says softly, scooting even closer to you. Now you notice, his thigh flush against yours hard to not overlook. You just nod, eyes hooded as he leans even closer.
“What do you like?” You breathe, chest rising and falling faster now, heart beating against your ribcage. 
“Well, if we’re telling the truth here. I like you.” You freeze, unable to form words, your body nearly trembling when you feel his hand come to rest upon your thigh. 
“And I know you like me too.” He whispers and you can only nod, all air stolen from your lungs as his hand inches higher up your thigh.
“Let me make you feel good.” He mumbles, lips mere centimeters from your neck. 
“Please.” You whimper, barely audible but it’s all John needs to dip his finger below the hem of your skirt and attach his lips to your neck. You immediately relax into his touch, all tension melting away as his calloused thumb rubs circles over your hip. 
“You know, you distract me too. Walking around always so damn beautiful. You make me crazy, ya know.” He mumbles into the skin of your throat. You can only communicate through moans and whimpers, hands coming up to grip his jumper. His hand is now completely under your skirt, the other gripping your jaw and the sensation has your eyes nearly rolling back in your head. He removes his hand from your thigh and hooks a finger in the hem of your skirt, pulling it down and leaving you in only underwear and a thin sweater. He nearly groans at the sight of you and finally leans in to give you a heated kiss to your parted lips, knocking the wind out of you. He settles himself between your legs, looking up at you through a thick veil of long lashes.
“What do you want, baby doll?” He asks, thumbing the material of your underwear as he does. You’re slumped on the edge of the couch, your legs trembling as you realize your fantasy is finally coming true and you intend to fulfill it to its entirety.
“Your fingers, John. Please.” You whimper, your hips wriggling involuntarily.
“I could’ve guessed that.” He laughs, and your entire body grows hot, unbearably so and you make a desperate noise of frustration. He slowly hooks his fingers into the material of your panties, pulling them down at a teasingly slow pace, his grey eyes never leaving yours. You whimper as he throws the garment to the side, you can feel your wetness pool onto the couch. John groans and pulls you closer to his face by your hips, not hesitating to bring a finger into your folds to collect your wetness. 
“This all for me?” He asks, popping his finger into his mouth, moaning at the taste of you. 
“Yes, John. All for you.” You breathe, silently begging him to continue. And oh, he does. He thumbs your clit and you nearly lurch forward at the shocks it sends up your body, the desperate moan that leaves your mouth music to John’s ears. He then brings two fingers lower to tease your entrance and he’s tempted to completely ruin you but hesitates. 
“John, please.” You beg, lifting your hips desperately. He sits up, his face next to yours, so close you can feel his breath fan over your face. His fingers are still so close to where you need him and you open your eyes to look at him, his eyes are almost unrecognizable clouded with lust. 
“I wanna watch you fall apart.” He mumbles, then thrusts both fingers into your entrance, almost pulling a scream from you. 
“Fuck.” You whine as he picks up a steady pace, you can feel the cool metal of his rings against your skin and it only adds to the pleasure building in your lower stomach. 
“Fuck, you’re so tight. And that just around my fingers.” He groans, almost smug as he continues working your pussy. He suddenly brushes a particular spot within you and you almost see stars, releasing a high pitched moan as he does it again.
“Fuck, right there.” You moan, back arching off of the couch. He returns his lips to your neck, his other arm under you for support. 
“You gonna cum for me, angel?” He asks roughly, his thumb coming up to press against your clit. You spasm around his fingers, the coil within you so close to snapping. You can feel the pressure of your coming orgasm in your chest, almost choking you. 
“Fuck, John.” You whimper, breaths coming out heavy as you near your high.
“Cum for me.” He growls, curling his fingers as he does and your vision goes white. Your back arches off of the couch and you grab onto John as the aftershocks rock you, your entire body is pulsing and its almost overwhelming. John fingers are slowing within you and when you finally relax onto the cushions, he pulls them out and immediately brings them to his lips, moaning as he swirls his tongue around the digits, looking at you the entire time. You breathing finally steadies and John gets up to retrieve your underwear, slipping the pair back over your legs and hips. He sits back down, pulling you into his side and placing a kiss atop your head, his hand running over your exposed thigh. You’re close to sleep, his heartbeat helping to soothe your frazzled nerves. Before your eyes can close, John speaks.
“You should ask me to come help you with homework more often.” He laughs, and you lightly smack his chest before snuggling into the sweet-smelling fabric. John allows you to nap, hoping that once you both get back to calculus, you’ll find another distraction to occupy the both of you. 
I am suddenly sweaty -macy:)
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tarithenurse · 6 years ago
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On my mind, in my soul - 14
Prompt:  Prompts are by Devilbat: “Lose you tonight” by HIM, Istanbul (cause I’m difficult), a fork. However, the originally suggested song had the ability to really get me down, so they suggested “Burning Desire” by Lana Del Rey. Pairing: Loki x Burglar!reader. Content: Swearing as usual (I think), so much lemon you won’t see clear for a day. Oh and a bit of feels. A/N: Alright, so I’ve updated twice within a short time. That doesn’t mean we’re back to the old routine, just that I’m procrastinating from thesis to avoid screaming at my project partner. Please! I need some kind words of encouragement, so comment and reblog if you like the chapter! And let me know if you want a tag.
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Touch down
Tears are streaming from your eyes and your knees are weak, threatening to buckle under you. The cacophonic lightshow known as Bifrost has disappeared and all that’s left of it is a smouldering pattern on the ground around you and Loki.
Loki.
Turning in the arm he’s wound around your waist you finally have a chance to look properly at him since the morning days ago. He looks healthier. Maybe. It’s kind of hard to tell because he’s so pale from nature (or whatever it is that makes him look human) and of course he’s still pale. But there are no dark bags under his eyes, and his lips are soft and pink, begging you to kiss them.
All too son, he pulls away. “[Y/N]. I should not indulge you but chastise you.” Still he pecks a series of tiny kisses onto your face.
“You’d rather be stuck alone in a cell?” The words are mumbled, half swallowed by your quest to find his mouth again.
A chuckle and sharp bite to your bottom lip is the price you get. “It was risky.”
“I’d already lost everything.”
Turquoise eyes find yours, boring into your soul while managing to retain their own secrets. Almost. A shimmer collects and dances before spilling onto the perfect cheekbone. Loki allows you to kiss it away, but as soon as the salt has touched your lips, the god embraces you tighter than ever before. You can feel his chest heave. Feel the tremble of his shoulders underneath your palms that seek to cradle him in return.
“But…you would have…lived!” Hoarse. Broken. Each word contains more pain and desperation than you thought this controlled man could show. “Ris-sking your lif–“
“Shut up!” Surprisingly, he does as you tell him, backs strained to see each others’ faces. “What good would a life be if it’s spent in misery? Gods, I sound like your brother the way I talk! But you get it, right? You understand that I’d be missing a part?” The words are rushed, interrupted by soothing noises and kisses. “Maybe…maybe smarter people would call it Stockholm Syndrome…I dunno…an’ I don’t care! I just know that while I was dying, I was holding on for you. And when I woke…it was you I needed.”
“Please, don’t...”
“No, you need to understand this!” Why doesn’t he want to accept it? “My life is yours. I love you.”
It would’ve been neat to say the world stood still as you watched the words sink in, burn themselves into Loki’s heart.
But the way reality works, the only sudden event nearby is a bird chasing a cat away. Some insects are buzzing in the drying bushes on the other side of the grassy area, and at least the sun is shining hot and unforgiving, but the traffic noise in the distance continues relentlessly. And still, you wait for Loki to say something. Anything.
“[Y/N]…” he whispers, “nothing I can say will be enough…but I love you too.”
A breath you didn’t know you’d been holding escapes as a soft whine. All it takes to stifle it is to find the cool lips. Soothing in the heat. Oh, it’s warm alright, and dry too.
“Where are we?”
The place where Bifrost has dropped you seems to be a sort of park on top of a hill, but it’s so dry that most plants have either withered or are the type that might survive in an actual desert. Beyond the hilltop, a city sprawls in all directions, rising and falling with the landscape beneath the buildings towards a glittering sea and a sort of canal leading in through the very heart of the metropolis. Alright, metropolis might be taking it a bit too far for a New Yorker, but it’s obvious even for you that this is a big and probably old place.
“I know this place,” Loki smiles, “Although it has changed since my last visit.” Squinting up at him, you wait for an explanation. “Welcome to Constantinople!”
“We’ve been dumped in Istanbul?” Fuck, none of us have passports.
But Loki’s beaming, already weaving magic over the both of you to fix the appearance. “Is that what it’s called nowadays? Either way, no need to fret, my dear…I’ll take care of you.”
You ask me where I've been? I been everywhere
He hadn’t lied. Of course he hadn’t. As soon as the two of you had left the park, he somehow managed to hail a cab, and before you knew it, you’d arrived at a swanky hotel in the best part of town. It’d confused you for a moment that the concierge apparently knew Loki, but you were willing to forgive either of them when you were led into a mindboggling suite on the top floor.
Since then, you’ve showered and dressed (choosing from a selection of clothes that had been brought up to the suite) and now find yourself standing on the terrace. The rays of the descending sun have lost the bite and you revel in the breeze that carries a tang of salt and seaweed floating in the air over the low buildings or between the few wannabe skyscrapers. One of the first things you’d noticed were the minarets in the distance and you promise yourself you’ll use this opportunity to actually see some of the world.
“I find the view magnificent.” Loki’s voice drifts from the open door.
Turning, you see him dressed perfectly in his signature black-on-black suit, hair still damp from the shower. “Mmmm, I don’t mind looking this direction though.”
You return the grin even though a heat springs to your cheeks at the way he’s looking your over. Lazily. Devouring you with his icy eyes. He ought to, though, because you’ve taken special care to find a figure-hugging green dress with black and golden accents. Although the front is relatively modest with long sleeves and high neckline (ignoring the tightness, though) the back is bare, skin visible through a cut-out shaped like a kite that shows off exactly what isn’t worn underneath.
“It can’t be that long since you’ve been here since you know people,” you observe as you walk over to take his arm, allowing him to lead you away from the gorgeous lodgings, “where else can you expect a greeting like that?”
Rather than answer, Loki begins to tell you about the city and its convoluted history where diverse cultures have clashed again and again.
…   Loki’s PoV   …
There are many interesting people even in this measly realm known as Midgard. In fact, Loki might even go so far as to say that the world itself can hold a certain charm with the oddities there are to learn if scrutinizing the events of past and present. And the mortals? Naïve. For the most boring and grotesquely optimistic of their own importance. Of course, there are the Avengers which are entertaining in their own way. Nothing compares to you, my love.
[Y/N] is listening to every word, [Y/E/C] eyes glittering with fascination at the sight of the ancient city walls where long forgotten armies had held the ancient capital under siege. It’s not the first time Loki notices how eagerly the woman absorbs information. Not only history, but anything from the position of a chair, the movement of another person, or the writing on a building. Nothing escapes her attention but is evaluated silently.
Coloured lips cradle the edge of the glass before sending him a slight smirk. Loki feels his body react to the way [Y/N]’s tongue delicately licks a stray drop from the bottom lip and his soul screams in protest as she excuses herself, disappearing further back into the restaurant with a sinful swaying of the hips and the perfectly sculpted back exposed to the gaze of everyone in the place. Mine. Pride mixes with the sting of jealousy towards those that stare for too long. But he cannot truly fault them for looking.
Mine.
Memories resurface of the woman’s back arching, his own hands running trailing the spine and sides until his fingers dig into the flesh of the shapely hips to pull her closer. Hard and fast. Every movement met by a thrust of his hips that makes the feminine shoulder blades before him shift under soft skin and [Y/N] cry out in ecstasy.
The clink of cutlery against porcelain shatters the illusion, brining the god back to the present where his cock is straining against the trousers and his throat has gone dry.
Your hands were on my hips, your name is on my lips Over over again, like my only prayer
…   Reader’s PoV   …
Dinner hadn’t finished before you started teasing the god. Maybe the wine had made you braver, maybe the intensity of the last many days had made you reckless. Whatever the reason, you found immense satisfaction in watching Loki’s eyes darkened with lust and fixated on you each time you swiped the tongue over your lips or when you withdrew the fork from your mouth, careful to slow the action enough that it almost became lewd. For a moment, the god’s hands had disappeared below the table and an idea popped into your head and after checking the coast was clear, you slipped off the chair and under the perfect hiding spot created by the tablecloth.
The fork was still dangling from your lips, freeing you to crawl to Loki’s knees and slide your hands up his thighs. You could feel the muscles tense as he shifted in his seat, but it’s his cock that quickly had your attention as it was freed from the confines of his pants. His balls too, just for good measure.
Muffled by the table, the god’s hiss still reached you when your tongue traced the length of his erection. Hand and tongue played across the thin skin, quickly ensuring glistening precum to be swept across the head of the cock with each motion. And you hadn’t even taken him in your mouth.
Steps approached, a waiter asking if everything was to the satisfaction, when you decided to place the cold metal of the fork on the cockhead. No reaction. A slow drag of the prongs over the delicate skin of his balls had the wished effect of a stutter in the speech. It also paralysed his movement, though…and how were you supposed to ignore such an opportunity. Taking him in fully, you felt the shaft throb against your tongue as the tip reached and passed your gag reflexes in one smooth move. A shattering of glass could be heard from somewhere above you.
You don’t know how you’ve made it all the way back to the hotel without Loki losing his composure. He’s shaking, eyes dark and there’s even a hint of red seeping into the sclera from the edges. Not a word is spoken during the elevator ride, but his palm never leaves your lower back.
The moment the door to the suite closes behind you, he spins you and press your chest up against the wood. Arms twisted behind you back and legs nudged as far apart as possible by his knee, it surprises you that no fear rears its head even now when Loki’s got you at his mercy although you can feel cold radiating from his body.
“My pet,” he growls, breathing heavy against your throat, “are you truly aware of what you have started?”
Tilting your ass slightly to rub against the bulge in his crotch, it’s impossible not to smile at his groan. “Oh…I know.”
The sound from Loki is feral and it’s a miracle he bothers using magic to rid you of your clothes before hoisting your over his shoulder. Hell-o! Golden sparkles dissolves his own clothes, granting you with a view worth all the riches you’ve ever stolen. Never in your wildest dreams (prior to meeting him, of course) had you thought you’d end up loving the colour blue as much as you do now, but it’s possibly divine on the perky ass of his that shows perfect definition with each step through the suite. Just out of reach. Wiggling doesn’t bring your any closer, it only buys you a slap that makes your own ass sting and every muscle in your nether regions clench. At least Loki soothes the sting by stroking gently. Then a cold stroke flutters along the part of the folds that are easy to reach.
Without any warning, the world tilt and spins to make sure you landing, bouncing, on the bed, but as you try to get your bearings everything gets flipped around once more and you find yourself on knees and elbows with your ass kept in the air by strong hands on your hips. Oh, is all you manage to think before you’re filled in one smooth thrust.
“Mine!” It’s a snarl, pulled from the depths of Loki’s chest.
Concentrating to formulate anything similar to a coherent sentence, you retort: “Your what?” You try to relax, hoping to acclimate yourself to the size of his cock.
“My pet,” he accentuates the nickname with a hard thrust, “my queen.”
Core clenches tightly around the ridged member, making you both groan. It’ll be a miracle if he can last much longer before blowing the load, because he’d been denied that pleasure at the restaurant partially for fear of getting caught…but mostly to torment him. Now you’re dealing with the consequences. Fuck yeah.
Perhaps there’s better sex to be had, but after seeing Loki so weak...after almost losing him…
“Ma-make me yours, my-y king!”
Your keening cry is the only argument needed for him to reach his high. His heaving chest against your back, the last few ruts of his hips are accompanied an almost painful bite on your shoulder that muffles his guttural growl.
I've got a burning desire for you, baby (I've got a burning desire)
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Chapter 9: How am I even supposed to be feeling right now?
In which a certain skeleton realizes he’s smarter than he thinks.
*Sans's POV*
It's been like two weeks since (Y/N) stayed at the Dreemurr's house with everyone else. I take that day as a reference because a lot of things have happened.
One of them, my new home... that feels really tense.
Our parents decided to live with us so we all can have a better relationship with each other (well, it was actually Arial's idea), and I just let it be. Now I fucking regret it, 'cause I remembered that Gaster is a stupid asshole. He just criticizes everything I say, I do, or I've ever done with my life. It's fucking annoying to hear he has "such a disappointment of a son" every two seconds and poor, innocent, Paps trying to dismiss his bullshit.
Arial, being in love with the doc like if they just started dating, never said a word defending me. But, in order to look like a good person, she doesn't defend her perfect husband.
Go on- defend that piece of crap, Mom.
Honestly, Papyrus and I could have been perfectly well on our own, just like we were in the Underground. He's now fifteen, and I am twenty-two; isn't it too late to try to bond a connection?! They should have tried when Papy was just a kid and I was a fucking depressed teenager, trying to sustain my brother and the place we lived.
Oh, did I mention I was the one who paid everything? They didn't put a single freaking cent! I did all on my own, I even got a lot of trouble to persuade one human into buying my old house. And all for this?! Now I can't even get on my house and smile to my little brother without being judged...
Ah...
I really miss those times.
When I would get out of school or of... "work", and meet the smiley face of my brother. That smile is what keeps me from ending it all. I just can't leave him behind with that fucking couple of irresponsible parents while I'm burning in hell.
I just can't.
Today, though, we are out of that uncomfortable place and back on the Dreemurr's house. It's really big, and, I must admit, better than anything I could ever afford. Toriel insisted that we shouldn't lose our friendship, therefore, everyone must go. And so there I was going, trying to resist the urge to punch Gaster on the face and then go to my bed and cry while I fall asleep...
That was too specific.
When I arrived, boom! Surprise surprise! (Y/N) was there, freaking out in the middle of an argument, hosted by Undyne and Mettaton.
Poor girl.
Papyrus did whatever it was on my mind, and intervened. The dispute ended quickly, thanks to Papyrus's innocence not wanted to be ruined. My death glare also helped but, hey- Papy did almost everything, so he gets the credit.
(Y/N) let out a sigh of relief, then awkwardly muttered a 'thank you'. She anxiously looked over at the four of us, then waved shyly before disappearing into the kitchen with Tori.
She... is certainly something. I don't think I've ever seen anyone this nervous before.
Maybe she has problems socializing, but that would make no sense. But now that I remember, she indeed was anxious whenever we went for a meeting with her.
Or whenever we hang out.
...
Actually, I think she's nervous about the mere fact of being around us. We must be a huge group of weirdos to her, while in her head she's planning an excuse for how to escape.
"Ah, well..." she interrupted, gaining everyone's attention "I have the results for, uh, your access in our education systems. I believe I, well, have everything specified in your documents, so... yeah... do you, eh, want me to give them to you...?"
Silence. And then, a grateful and unexpected squeak, courtesy of Toriel.
"Oh! That's just wonderful! Thank you so much!"
"Ah, it's... nothing" (Y/N) answered, with a seemingly usual hint of anxiety in her voice.
Then she grabbed a shitton of folders and started to giving them to us. I took mine nervously and remembered all the times I studied really hard for school. I remembered, also, every book I read and how I ended up learning French.
I just hope it wasn't for nothing.
I took a deep breath, now remembering the exam we had to do in an office, like if it was a diagnostic test. It wasn't that hard but, what if I failed? I swear to God that if I need to do high school again, I will kill myself.
I opened it slowly, almost closing my eyes in fear. A panic attack started to take over my body, and I must have shown it since (Y/N) was giving me a concerned look.
"Sans, are you okay?" She whispered softly, making me relax just a bit. Then her eyes lighted up a little as if she now understood "Don't worry, you did well. In fact, you did perfectly!"
Gaining more confidence from her small smile, I opened it quickly and checked the first page. Then I stood in shock, my mind going numb and my mouth opening slightly.
...
College.
I can go to college.
To fucking university, like a normal person at my age would.
I looked at her and noticed she was almost smirking by my reaction. Then she gave me the biggest smile she could and a thumbs up.
And, I swear to God, I felt amazing.
I checked the other papers, and I was becoming even happier. Texts said that I was a mastermind, that I could even get a huge scholarship in an important university if I wanted to. My redaction skills were noted as perfect, which made my nonexistent heart skip a beat. My science knowledge was amusing, and math, oh lord, had really high notes.
At the end of the documents, I noticed a little post-it. I looked at it curiously and started reading it as soon as I grabbed it in my hands:
<<Hi Sans!
You did really well on basically everything! You should be proud!
If you are interested in going to a university any time sooner, I recommend you to check out Ebott University. It's one of the best schools in the country, and I think you have the capacity to join! Hell, even have a great scholarship there!
No pressure, though. It's just a suggestion, after all!
I just wanted to congratulate your excellent results, and to tell you that you can do it! You looked really stressed after giving your test, so I thought I should tell you this: you'll do just fine, Sans. Have more confidence in yourself, alright? If not for you, at least for your brother, who I see that it is really important to you.
I wish you the best of lucks, my friend!
(Y/N) (L/N)>>
I didn't know how to react. The only thing I know I did it's that I smiled all the time, and felt like this was just a happy dream about me being successful in life. I just couldn't believe that all my effort did work.
I glanced at her and saw that Papyrus was chatting excitedly about his future. He proclaimed that he would do his best in order to "make her effort count". I smiled, noticing that, after a long time, I shared the same enthusiasm as Papyrus.
I must have been staring because Paps waved at me energetically while she just let out a happy sigh.  
"BROTHER! I AM FIT TO THE HIGH SCHOOL LEVEL!" he exclaimed, making me smile even more. "I'LL FINALLY BE ABLE TO LEARN NEW THINGS, SANS!"
With Papyrus in school, I think I can work for a better future in the midtime.
After such a long time.
Everyone else was also excited, confirmed by Gaster's small and hypocritical smile.
He probably did better than I did.
I looked over his paper and saw it; he could instantly go for the scientist role in any place...
And I have to study.
My smile twitched a little but quickly forgot my dismay by a big hug from my brother. Oh lord, what I would do without him?
I wOUld prObaBLy k!ll mYsEl-
Calm down, Sans.
You've got this.
I returned to my old and casual smile, relaxing a bit. We're out of the Underground now- it's my chance to finally do what I want. And what I want to do right now...
It's to buy another book.
...
Nerd.
A lot of people are actually surprised when they hear I love reading, especially the classics. I must seem so relaxed and chill for them, then. Which it's good since that's my favorite side of me, but... maybe keeping this reading obsession out of view it's dragging me down. It would be better to find someone to share these things with...
But who?
I snapped back into reality and shrugged it off. I can't lose my cool.
I just can't.
Eventually, I caught up into the conversation everyone was being part of. As expected, the topics were related to the future and how are we going to make our dreams come true. (Y/N), however, was just smiling there, trying to fit in silently. But, obviously, she felt excluded every time she tried to gain the courage to say something.
She doesn't seem to be up for conversations, either. When Toriel asked her a few things, she stuttered and played with her fingers. I have no idea how I managed to understand everything she said, but somehow I could. Still, I feel sorry for her. She probably doesn't want to be here.
I wonder why she helped us, though. She hasn't asked for money just yet, and she tries her best to don't be rude at all. She apologizes a lot and freaks out whenever someone acts to be offended or sad. Whenever there is an argument, she probably has a mental breakdown and tries her best to don't surpass some limits or to let the problem go any further. The mere look of her face is the purest description of anxiety I've ever seen...
Maybe she suffers, indeed, anxiety...
But you just can't ask her, can you?
...
Of course not.
It would be stupid to arrive at her side and immediately ask "hey girl, do you have anxiety???".
She would stop talking to me, and considering that we'll see each other more in the future, I just can't go on and make our friendship awkward.
...
Wait- friendship?! You don't even know her that much!!!
...
But she indeed called me in the post-it as a friend.
My skull was starting to hurt, and curiously, it's been for a problem that isn't mine. I must admit, though; anxious or not anxious, (Y/N) seems to be really nice. And she's like, smart as fuck.
Or that's how I see her, who knows.
"HUMAN!" Papyrus exclaimed, snapping me back to reality... again. "WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SO NERVOUS TO TALK TO US? WE WON'T HURT YOU!"
Oh shi-
"Ah, eh... I, em, don't know...? It's just, ah... eh..."
Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit
"It's just, em... I... how do I explain, em... ah..."
Tell her something, you fucking asshole!!!!!!!
"ah, kid. you don't need to say it if you don't want to. i bet everyone will understand"
She just looked at me nervously, like if she was asking for reassurance. I nodded my head slowly and gave her a thumbs-up, trying to calm her down. She took a deep breath and smiled, a hint of confidence gleaming in her eyes.
Wait, is she going to say it? Why-
"Well, em, Papyrus" she started, shaking her hands in order to calm down "I suffer from something called... anxiety. I was diagnosed some months ago, actually".
Oh, so I was right?
How sad, she's so nice to suffer from something like that.
Wait, so that means she-
"wait, so you are enjoying your time here? for real?"
"Oh, of course!" she responded immediately, smiling nervously at my statement. I'm such an asshole "I actually was starting to miss getting out of my crappy apartment to socialize with other people! I'm... not the best at it, though. I do suck at making new friends and- shitidontevenknowifyouguysconsidermeasafriendimsosorry"
Was she for real? It's difficult to see this girl as someone not loved or wanted. I mean, I must admit she's pretty and, besides, she's super nice and patient. I'm starting to see that she didn't do this for money, but because that's her nature. A kind girl, not standing social injustices. Her words and her personality now make sense- she's just that different to others that she finds it difficult to have real friends.
"HUMAN! I'M DELIGHTED TO HEAR YOU WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH US! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, ACCEPT YOUR OFFER AND I'LL BE THE COOLEST FRIEND YOU'LL HAVE!"
I should probably tell her the same.
...
I'm rooting to be friends with this girl, I just can't dismiss the fact she wants some company.
But aren't I judging her too quickly?
...
She looks lonely for real, though.
I mean, I do have Papyrus, but she seems to have no one at her side. And that just fucking sucks. I don't think anyone deserves to be so lonely and so misunderstood. I don't even understand how she has dealt with it! I don't think I'll ever be able to be alone with my mind. I would have probably killed myself as a teenager and not been here.    
"hey kid, you've been really nice and, well, a real light of hope to all of us. i don't think anyone here wouldn't like to be your friend. or well, at least i don't, y' know?"
She smiled and seemed a lot more relaxed, as everyone else nodded at my words. I could see she felt more accepted, which made me feel better. It's stupid, isn't it? I feel good because I included someone that deserved to be included since the beginning.
"Oh, I know!" Frisk raised her finger in the sky, gaining all of our attention "We should do a huge sleepover party in order to commemorate our new friend, (Y/N)!"
Papyrus gasped with lights in his eyes, clearly excited about this new idea. (Y/N), though... she looked like she was freaking out a lot. I put one of my hands on her shoulder, trying to tranquilize her, and incredibly she did. She gave me a small smile and mouthed an "I'll be ok", which made me smile as well.
As much as I must hate humanity, I think she's an exception.
But I really don't know
"BUT FIRST!" Papy screamed, bringing with himself a ton of wood pieces and a hammer. Then he locked the door completely and put a padlock that I don't know where it came from. "THERE! NOW NO ONE CAN ESCAPE THE PARTY! NYEH HEH HEH!"
I swear to God, almost everyone had a heart attack at that moment. And (Y/N), of course, seemed like she was dead for a moment.
Before we could react, a bunch of blankets and pillows were all over the couch, and my brother was already connecting the Wii and the Xbox. Undyne was bringing chips from the cabinet (without any permission, by the way), and the kid was getting some board games.
This is gonna be a long night.
(Y/N), without anything else to do, offered herself to help. But since she was "the guest", the official planners of this sleepover didn't let her. And since I wasn't going to help, we ended up sitting on the couch, talking about... well, anything.
"is there any way we can help with, uh, your anxiety?" I asked her, trying to feel more, well, accessible...?
"Well, um... I think I'll be ok. As long as I'm not dragged into a huge party with unknown people... which it's not totally happening, haha..." she paused, then she glanced at me in horror "Right?!"
"considering mettaton, uh..." I stopped, knowing I fucked up "...maybe?"
I shrugged at her with a small and nervous smile and her eyes widened a lot. I felt horrible, but I just couldn't lie to her. If she's gonna continue here with us, Mettaton's personality will need some... moderations? And honestly, I don't think he'll ever moderate that slutty character he has created, that it's the dirtiest version of himself.
She sighed though, realizing that, no matter how much she wanted things to be different, she couldn't change them. Or could she?
"It's okay, I guess" she started with a deep breath, like if this was something difficult to her "I mean, I just declared that I have anxiety, whichistilldontunderstandwhyidid, but that doesn't mean people should be different around me or take pity on me. The world just doesn't work like that, and that's fine! So I think there's no way to help my little ol' problem... except medicine, of course"
"oh, so you already went to the doctor then?"
"Yeah... but I constantly forget to take the, uh... pills..."
Wow, so she doesn't even care that much? Or it's just that she cares more about work? Probably the second, but it doesn't really matter. (Y/N) has anxiety and she isn't dealing with it the proper way, but I'm no one to tell her, well, anything about it. I haven't been responsible for ages, I'm not gonna tell this girl any advice about responsibility.
Not today.
Not ever.
"EVERYONE! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAS SETTLED THE GAME!" Papy shouted, shutting up all my thoughts about this kid. Thank God.
"oh really, and what is it bro?" I asked, sounding as lazy as usual and hiding my real self with a smile. It always works.
"TODAY, BROTHER!" he posed heroically "WE ARE PLAYING A POPULAR HUMAN GAME THAT REQUIRES STRATEGY AND GOOD THINKING!"
Huh?
"WE ARE PLAYING..." (notice the dramatic suspense)
"...MONOPOLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Is this the part where I shout in happiness or where I scream in horror?
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lovetaylorswift29 · 5 years ago
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LOVE is a Ruthless GAME
🎲 ♥️ 🎲 ♠️ 🎲
Better Than Revenge:
Soon she's gonna find / Stealing other people's TOYS on the playground / Won’t make you many friends
State of Grace:
This is a state of grace / This is the worthwhile fight / LOVE IS A RUTHLESS GAME/ Unless you play it good and right
The Lucky One:
New to town with a MADE UP NAME / In the Angel city, chasing fortune and fame / And the camera flashes MAKE IT LOOK like a dream / You had it figured out since you’re in school Everybody loves PRETTY, Everybody loves COOL / So overnight you look like a sixties' queen
Now it's big black cars and Riviera views / And your LOVER in the foyer doesn’t even know you / And your secrets end up splashed on the news front page / And they tell you that you're LUCKY, but you're so confused / 'Cause you don’t feel pretty, you just feel used / And all the young things line up to take your place / Another name goes up in lights / You wonder if you'll MAKE IT OUT ALIVE
They say you bought a bunch of land somewhere / Chose the Rose Garden over Madison Square / And it took some time, but I understand it now
Blank Space:
NICE TO MEET YOU, where you been? / I could show you incredible things / magic, madness, heaven, sin / Saw you there and I thought / Oh my God, look at that face / You look like my next mistake / LOVE’S A GAME, WANNA PLAY? / New money, suit and tie / I can read you like a magazine / Ain't it funny, RUMORS FLY / And I know you heard about me
SO HEY, LET’S BE FRIENDS / I'm dying to see how this one ends / Grab your passport and my hand / I can make the bad guys good for a weekend / So it's gonna be forever, or it's gonna go down in flames / You can tell me when it's over, if the high was worth the pain / Got a long list of ex-lovers / They'll tell you I'm insane 'Cause you know I love the PLAYERS / And you love the GAME
You're the KING, baby I'm your QUEEN / Find out what you want / Be that girl for a month / Wait the worst is yet to come / Screaming, crying, perfect storm / I can make all the tables turn / Rose gardens filled with thorns / Keep you second guessing like, "Oh my God, who is she?" / I get drunk on jealousy / But you'll come back each time you leave / 'Cause darling I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream
Shake It Off:
I go on too many dates / But I can't make them stay / at least that’s WHAT PEOPLE SAY
I never miss a beat / I'm lightning on my feet / and that’s WHAT THEY DON’T SEE
I'm dancing on my own / I make the moves up as I go / And that's WHAT THEY DON’T KNOW
New Romantics:
We show off our different scarlet letters / Trust me, mine is better / We're so young, but we're on the road to ruin / WE PLAY DUMB, but know exactly what we're doing / We cry tears of mascara in the bathroom / Honey, life is just a classroom
'Cause, baby, I could build a castle out of all the bricks they threw at me / And every day is like a battle, but every night with us is like a dream
Baby, we're the NEW ROMANTICS / The best people in life are FREE
We're all here, the lights and boys are blinding / We hang back, it’s all in the timing / It's POKER / He can't see it in my face, but I'm about to PLAY my ACE
We need love, but all we want is danger / We team up, then SWITCH SIDES like a record changer / The rumors are terrible and cruel, but honey MOST OF THEM ARE TRUE
Ready For It:
But if he’s a ghost, then I can I can be a phantom / Holdin' him for RANSOM
I see nothing better, I KEEP HIM forever / Like a VENDETTA
I-I-I see how THIS is gonna go / Touch me, and you'll NEVER be alone
In the middle of the night, in my dreams / I know I'm gonna be with you / So I take my time / ARE YOU READY FOR IT?
Knew I was a robber / First time that he saw me / stealing hearts and running off and never saying sorry / But if I'm a thief, then he can join the heist / And we’ll move to an Island / And he can be my jailer / Burton to this Taylor / Every love I've known in comparison is a failure / I forget their names now / I'm so very tame now / Never be the same now
Baby, let the games begin / Let the GAMES begin / LET THE GAMES BEGIN.
End Game:
I wanna be your END GAME / I wanna be your FIRST STRING / I wanna be your A-TEAM / I wanna be your end game / END GAME
Big reputation, BIG REPUTATION / Ooh, you and me, WE GOT BIG REPUTATIONS / Ah, and YOU heard about ME / Ooh, I got some BIG ENEMIES
I don't wanna hurt you, I just wanna be / Drinking on a beach with you all over me / I know what they all say, but I'M NOT TRYING TO PLAY
And I BURY hatchets, but I KEEP maps of where I put them / REPUTATION precedes me, they told you I'M CRAZY/ I swear I don't love the DRAMA, it loves me
You've been CALLING MY BLUFF on all my usual tricks / So here's the TRUTH from my red lips
I Did Something Bad:
I never trust a narcissist, but they love me / So I PLAY them like a violin and I MAKE IT LOOK oh so easy / 'Cause for every lie I tell them, they tell me three / This is how the world works / Now all he thinks about is me
I can feel the flames on my skin / Crimson red paint on my lips / If a man TALKS SHIT, then I owe him nothing / I don't regret it one bit, 'cause he had it coming
I never trust a playboy, but they love me / So I fly him all around the world and I let them think they saved me / They never see it coming, what I do next / This is how the world works / You gotta leave before you get left
I can feel the flames on my skin / He says, "Don't throw away a good thing" / But if he drops my name, then I owe him nothing / And if he spends my change, then he had it coming
Don’t Blame Me:
I've been breakin' hearts a long time / And TOYING with them older guys / Just PLAY THINGS for me to use
Look What You Made Me Do:
I don't like your little GAMES / Don't like your tilted stage / The ROLE you made me PLAY / Of the fool, no I don't like you
But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time / Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time / I've got a list of names and YOURS IS IN RED, underlined / I check it once, then I CHECK IT twice
Ooh, look what you made me do / Look what you made me do / Look what you just made me do / LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO
I don't like YOUR kingdom keys / They once belonged to ME / You ask me for a place to sleep / Locked me out and threw a feast / The world moves on, another day, another DRAMA / But not for me, not for me, all I think about is KARMA / And then the world moves on, but one thing's for sure / Maybe I got mine, but YOU’LL ALL GET YOURS
I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me / I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams / I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me / I'll be the ACTRESS starring in your bad dreams
"I'm sorry, the old Taylor can't come to the phone right now" / "Why?" / "Oh, 'cause she's dead!"
Getaway Car:
It was the best of times, the worst of crimes / I struck a match and blew your mind, but I didn't mean it / And you didn’t see it / The ties were black, the lies were white
“X" marks the spot, where we fell apart / He poisoned the well, I WAS LYING TO MYSELF
We were jet-set, Bonnie and Clyde / Until I switched to the other side / It's no surprise I turned you in / 'Cause us TRAITORS NEVER WIN / I’m in a getaway car / I left you in a motel bar / Put the money in a bag and I stole the keys / That was the last time you ever saw me
Cruel Summer:
Bad, bad boy / SHINY TOY with a PRICE / You know that I BOUGHT IT
Devils ROLL THE DICE / Angels roll their eyes / What doesn't kill me makes me want you more
It's cool, that's what I tell them/ NO RULES in breakable heaven
The Man:
I would be complex / I would be cool / They'd say I played the field before I found someone to commit to / And that would be okay for me to do / Every conquest I had made would make me more of a boss to you / I'd be a FEARLESS leader / I'd be an alpha type / When everyone believes ya / What's that like? I'm so sick of running as fast as I can / Wondering if I'd get THERE quicker if I was a man / And I'm so sick of them coming at me again / 'Cause if I was a man, then I'd be the man
They'd say I hustled / Put in the work / They wouldn't shake their heads and question how much of this I deserve / What I was wearing, if I was rude / Could all be separated from my good ideas and power moves / And we would toast to me, let the PLAYERS PLAY / I'd be just like Leo, in Saint-Tropez
What's it like to brag about raking in dollars / And getting bitches and MODELS? / And it's all good if you're bad / And it's okay if you're mad / If I was out flashin' my dollas, I'd be a bitch, not a baller / They'd paint me out to be bad, so it's okay that I'm mad
The Archer:
Combat, I'm ready for combat / I say I don't want that, but what if I do? / 'Cause cruelty wins in the movies / I've got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you / Easy they come, easy they go / I jump from the train, I ride off alone / I NEVER GREW UP, it's getting so old / Help me hold onto you
I've been the archer / I've been the prey / Who could ever leave me, darling? / But who could stay?
And I cut off my nose just to spite my face / Then I hate my reflection for years and years
I've been the archer / I've been the prey / SCREAMING, who could ever leave me, darling? But who could stay? / 'Cause they see right through me / They see right through me / CAN YOU SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME?
THEY SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME / I SEE RIGHT THROUGH ME
Miss Americana & The Heartbreak Prince:
You know I adore you / I'm crazier for you / Then I was at sixteen / Lost in a film scene / Waving homecoming queens / Marching band playing / I'm lost in the lights
Running through rose thorns / I saw the scoreboard and ran for my life / No cameras catch my pageant smile / I counted days, I counted miles / To see you there / It's been a long time coming
The whole school is rolling fake dice / You PLAY stupid GAMES, you WIN stupid prizes / It's you and me / There's nothing like this / Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince
MY TEAM IS LOSING / Battered and bruising / I see the high fives / Between the bad guys / Leave with my head hung / You are the only one / Who seems to care
And I don't want you to go / I don't really want to FIGHT / 'Cause nobody's gonna WIN / I think you should come home
I just thought you should know / And I'll never let you go / 'Cause I know this is a FIGHT / That someday we're gonna WIN
Cornelia Street:
Back when we were card sharks, PLAYING GAMES / I thought you were leading me on / I packed my bags, left Cornelia Street / Before you even knew I was gone / But then you called, SHOWED YOUR HAND / I turned around before I hit the tunnel / Sat on the roof, you and I
London Boy:
We can go drivin' in, on my scooter / Uh, you know, just riding in London
I love my hometown as much as Motown / I love SoCal / And you know I love Springsteen, faded blue jeans, Tennessee whiskey / But something happened, I heard him laughing / I saw the dimples first and then I heard the accent / They say home is where the heart is / But that's NOT where mine lives
You know I love a London boy / I enjoy walking Camden Market in the afternoon / He likes my American smile / Like a child when our eyes meet, darling, I fancy you / Took me back to Highgate, met all of his best mates / So I guess all the RUMORS are true / You know I love a London boy / Boy, I fancy you
And now I love high tea, stories from uni, and the West End / You can find me in the pub, we are watching rugby with his school friends / Show me a gray sky, a rainy cab ride / Babe, DON’T THREATEN ME WITH A GOOD TIME / They say home is where the heart is / But God, I love the English
Stick with me, I'M YOUR QUEEN / Like a Tennessee Stella McCartney
Daylight:
My love was as cruel as the cities I lived in / Everyone looked worse in the light / There are so many lines that I've crossed, unforgiven / I'll tell you truth, but never, "Goodbye" / I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you / I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you / I've been sleepin' so long in a twenty-year dark night / And now I see daylight, I only see daylight
Luck of the draw only draws the unlucky / And so I became the butt of the joke / I wounded the good and I trusted the wicked / Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke / Maybe you ran with the wolves and refused to settle down / Maybe I've stormed out of every single room in this town / Threw out our cloaks and our daggers because it's morning now / It's brighter now
And I can still see it all in my mind / All of you, all of me intertwined / I once believed love would be black and white / But it's golden / And I can still see it all in my head / Back and forth from New York sneaking in your bed / I once believed love would be burning red / But it's golden / Like daylight
You gotta step into the DAYLIGHT and let it go / Just let it go / LET IT GO
I wanna be defined by the things that I love / Not the things I hate / Not the things I'm afraid of / The things that haunt me in the middle of the night / I just think that YOU ARE WHAT YOU LOVE
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unproduciblesmackdown · 5 years ago
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hablerie replied to your post
“eclipse, meteor, satellite thanks comrade.....happy natl coming out...”
that last one, Felt It... or like when u should have been more vocally Hurt instead of being like :) no ur good.... handshake emoji
love my achievement of being less convenient and feelin fine with being ruder to people. i really do not need the respect of any rando i’m encountering who has no place in my life, for starters. i have the lack of patience and the temper but i Also have the curse of “so for eons you Had to Not Say things you were perfectly justified in saying to terrible people” evolution and also if i’m stressed i’m already less likely to talk anyways so sometimes you Miss The Moment. and the whole “woop accommodate everyone” reflex but i Do have the “inherent belief i Should speak my mcfreaking mcmind” and that’s something gained. love to be meaner than i used to be! im giving myself the trophy
just off the top of my head: some people who really had it coming:
various times in elementary/middle school i sure could’ve been smarter at teachers and occasionally other students
the chemistry prof at the place i went to college
the second manager/owner at my first job
the second general manager at my third job
the assistant who told me i needed to clean rooms faster at the free dental clinic. like, i’m not gonna halfass wiping down these rooms, laura. sorry if my sterilization adds a whole ten minutes onto this endeavor for you
the manager we didn’t even work for at my second job where you went store to store as vendors, who wasn’t even being rude to me b/c i was shadowing this other guy who actually knew what i was doing b/c for some reason this job was like “yeah you can start on our second busied weekend of the year, when we’ll have no time to actually train you” and anyways this one guy was going on a Huge power trip at the very nice guy i was working with that day, and he wasn’t the type to get angry about that, but i was and i quit that job soon enough anyways and should’ve gone off at him b/c i was this fucking close anyways and he deserved it
managers going on power trips not even at me but who i was about to lose it at anyhow
customers
more customers
other customers
one time i was making a delivery and trying to figure out where the crap it was b/c the address was to a cordoned-off mid-renovations building and i was trying to look it up on my phone and some 70-something lady comes up to help and then gets an entire attitude acting like it’s obvious that i was making this delivery to a fucking ship. a goddamn boat with sails docked half a block over. like, oh i’m sorry, you wanna look at this paper and tell me where they mentioned it being an entire nautical ship??? why are you being all goote samaritan if you’re gonna get shitty about it. keep walking your bichon frise or whatever. the rich people in that entire area, i swear to god
coworkers pushing the “i swear to god” limits: the person who i guess considered me amusing enough to talk to but would do things like, too pointedly call me stupid sometimes, which isn’t enough on its own for me to give a shit, but what took the cake for me was the time i had to walk away for the express purpose of Not losing my shit at her on a special day i stopped at a gas station before coming in for my shift, briefly experienced some sexual assault there, came in to work agitated and frustrated and complained about it and she chose to say “wow i can’t believe you let him do that” and a nice coworker later tried to apologize on her behalf but i wasn’t even having that lmfao like. no.
somehow even Beyond that though was the coworker guy who would just like, be a bitch to people on purpose, like the time i talked to a baker i never talked to before b/c she was bemusedly like “yeah he said [bitchly thing to say]” and i was like yeah he’s just like that at any random time?? he’ll just do that deliberately?? to anybody? anyways so after i’d worked there for like 10 or 11 months, he used our department’s computer for something and saw what is regarded-as-legally recorded as my name but obviously isn’t my name, and then walked past me and clearly Pretended to ~slip of the tongue~ call me by that wrong name. this would’ve been a great moment to just go all out cause a scene. act 2 scene 4, jackass
coworkers Just Transphobe Things moments........jesus
that’s just some of the highlights of my Saltine B/c Bitches list. in fact times where i’m like “hmm maybe i should’ve held back my temper there” are mostly times where actually my only mistake was that i wish i’d committed more to just mouthing off to everyone. like, i hate all of you, thanks so much, and prioritizing Don’t Cause Yourself Trouble has done very little for me and been a detrimental hassle. i Do have some lil victories here and there, but not nearly enough. and too often it hasn’t even been me getting to express frustration or anything, but rather “me having to keep my cool and calmly voice my thoughts while grown people like twice or twice point fifth my age (mostly men) have a tantrum 
oh yeah, and at my second job i was maybe the only (or one of two? three?) non-cis-man workers at the particular facility i was based at and we had to come in for this meeting and a women from corporate was there and so were some other men and one of them pulled something so horrendously sexist to her i should’ve just gone right the hell off then and there. so too should any of the other like forty people in the room! but. ma’am i’m sorry about your crap day. time travel back to just go “What The Fuck” very loudly and clearly. fire me bitches, i only spent like five months at that place anyways
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Dear Trouble,
I might be okay, but I’m not. In a box beneath my head is a letter that you’ve never read. Is it cool that I, your nightmare dressed like a daydream, am starting to think I'll tell the story of us ? I shouldn't be asking myself why. This is the last time. I don't like your tilted stage, your perfect crime, the role you made me play. And when you take you take the very best of me so don't pretend it's such a mystery if I act insane.
Traitors never win.
Here's the truth from my red lips : I've never heard silence quite this loud, it's all too quiet. Better than revenge, the girl in the party dress, fearless, grabbed a pen, wrote you a song. You should have known (and I'd do it over and over and over again, I'm not afraid, I’ll make the moves up as I go).
Horrified looks from everyone in the room. Now I’m hiding in the curtains searching for an empty seat. They say I did something bad, got nothing in my brain. But thinking it through I've never been anywhere cold as you and I feel a responsibility to speak now. I know people throw rocks at what's upstanding and right but out of all the bricks I could build a castle. So I stand up with shaking hands and rosy cheeks. Wanna open your eyes and make you realize.
First chapter. Once upon a time, a few mistakes ago, you told me “you know I haven’t seen you around before”. I struck a match and blew your mind, you told me ’bout your past in the middle of the night. You think it’s funny when I’m mad, I think it’s strange that you think I’m funny, cause everybody loves pretty. What’s past is past, we’re dancing ’round the kitchen in the refrigerator light or right there in the parking lot. That slope is treacherous, strange to think the songs we used to sing, getting lost down a dead-end street.
Maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame. I told myself don’t get attached (don’t you dream impossible things ?) Maybe I was naive, school-girl crush, wonder struck (I can't possibly be that surprised all the time !) and never really had a chance. You asked me to try and stay out of everybody’s way. That should’ve sent me running. I should've seen the signs, slept with one eye open at night. I know I make the same mistakes, I never learn, thinking my wide-eyed gaze can make the bad guys good for a weekend.
But maybe it's you and your dark twisted games. I never saw you coming nor would I have suspected it – you throw your head back laughing like a little kid, why would you wanna break a perfectly good heart ? I almost had a bad feeling.
Had to wake up, smell another mess I didn't plan, fix my heart, put on my make up. One second it was perfect, you said you loved my hair undone, now I don’t feel welcome anymore but… Didn't you calm my fears with a Cheshire cat smile ? With a great little story ? You're an expert at sorry and keeping lines blurry (you're not sorry, you said sorry just for show, that face of an angel comes out just when you need it to). You said you needed space (what ?) then you come around again, driving to my house when you know you’re ’bout to cry, dark gray, all alone, find yourself at my door and say everything feels better. I lived in your chess game but you changed the rules everyday. The water filled my lungs, I screamed so loud, tied together with a smile that could light up this whole town, but no one heard a thing. I was dying invisible, riding shotgun in the front seat of your getaway car, til you put me down, a crumpled up piece of paper lying off the road on the cold hard ground. I remember it all too well. Burning red, spinning ’round in my head. What do you say when tears are streaming down your face in front of everyone you know ? Oh, what a shame, what a rainy ending. Blue like I’ve never known. Sad, tragic.
Beautiful ?
I honestly believed in you, I got that good girl faith, I was thinking that you could be trusted. But I got smarter. I didn’t know what I would find when I went looking for a reason to your share of secrets, you sick need to give love switching sides, and your wildfire lies and your humiliation. You should have known that word of what you did would get back to me. The unthinkable letdown, the last straw, was that twist of fate, the moment I knew what you put me through !
It was like slow motion : I break down on the kitchen floor. Know something now I didn’t before. Got me feeling like a nothing at all. So low you can’t feel anything now. Trying to figure out what is and isn’t true, no matter what you say. Take a look what you've done, how could you do… this ! All this time ! Did you think I wouldn’t hear ? This is why you can't have nice things. Because you break them like a promise. You’re the wrecking ball. Understand perfectly : you’re the kind of man that makes me sad. Just walk away ! It rains when you’re here and it rains when you’re gone. Makes me run for cover when you walk in, when you're around I’ve got nowhere to go. And I’ve been a lot of lonely places.
Pretends he doesn’t know that he’s the reason why I'm coming off a little shy, but I do. You might think I’m bullet-proof, but I’m not. Band-aids don’t fix bullet holes and words... how little they mean when you’re a little too late. Stupid girl, back up, back up, you don't feel pretty you just feel used. I'm not your typical princess, a new notch in your belt is all. I should've known. I should've known. I’d go back in time and change my own mind. But I can’t. The joke is on me.
No ! Don't blame me.
I swear I don't love the drama, it loves me. He poisoned the well, he had it coming. Therein lies the issue, friends don't try to trick you and mind-twist you ! He was long gone when he was enchanted to meet me. New money, suit and tie, some boys are trying too hard but I guess no amount of expensive stuff gives you dignity. They didn’t teach that in prep school ? So it’s up to me. I hate that because of you I can’t love you and I bet somebody made you cold, but, you had… 1, 2... 3 girls at home ! That’s how you got the girl and that’s how you lost the girl, so why you gotta be so mean and so shady ? And a liar ? And pathetic, chasing down the newest thing ? And mean ? And mean ?
Just… walk away ! Every smile you fake is so condescending. Talk to yourself, talk to the tears, talk to the Man who put you here. And don’t wait for the sky to clear cause everything has changed. I’d like to be my old-self again, but I’m still trying to find it. How do I get it back the way it was before ? All my flowers grew back as thorns, we got bad blood, butterflies turned to dust, problems and I don’t think we can solve ’em.
This ain’t a fairy tale, every man for himself. The old Juliet is dead, I’m not the kind of girl to forever hold your peace anymore. You're just another picture to burn and at least I did one thing right : I passed the pictures around.
All I think about is karma, just wait and see. I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams, keep you second guessing. Reputation precedes, all these things will catch up to you. You go talk to your friends, talk to my friends. People like you (liars, self-indulgent takers and the dirty, dirty cheats of the world) always want back, but I took an ax to a mended fence, I'm shaking my head, locking the gates. Death trap, time won't fly, you'll go back to December, built to fall apart, forever and always paralyzed by it, knee-deep. Call it what you want, a little revenge, this is how the world works. As far as I’m concerned, I’m ready to fly : I took your matches, and I can see you years from now, someday I'll be shining like fireworks over your sad empty town. I’ve got this music in my mind saying it’s gonna be all right to take the road less traveled-by. Any trace of you there in my rearview mirror disappearing now.
But the saddest fear comes creeping in, counting all the nasty scars you made : all love ever does is break and burn and end. Are we out of the woods yet ? I wish I’d never grown up.
Hold on, girl, you’re losing it.
This is me praying : take a deep breath in the mirror, life goes on, don't read the last page. Here's a toast to my real friends, I had the time of my life fighting dragons with you, laughing on a park bench thinking to myself : “Hey, isn't this easy ?” Here’s to my mamma, my excellent father, God smiles on my little brothers… don’t know how long it’s gonna take to feel okay, but I had the best days with you.
Fakers gonna fake, heartbreakers gonna break, this is how the cruel world where everybody stands and keeps scores works, not how the storyline ends. I'm gonna shake it off in the nick of time. Take away the pain. Begin again. I do it all the time. Heartbeat steady, keep your aim locked. September saw a months of tears, but there’s no time for just sitting here. I'll have new Septembers, turn flames to embers.
All I know since hours ago is the trick to holding on was all that letting go. Rudely barging in, I punched a hole in the roof, let the flood pouring down. It felt so good. Everybody needs to hear me out. There’s a silence, there’s my last chance. I owe him nothing.
And then, finally clean, I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative.
The end.
The lyrics aren't mine ( they're all @TaylorSwift 's).
The true story is.
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fox-household · 7 years ago
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Act 3: A Fellow Science Enthusiast, Chapter 1
Alright, here we are again, this one isn’t very long compared to how long it took to post this, also not to much happens action wise, so sorry about that. Anyway hope you enjoy the content, I’ll add links later because I am a tired individual.  Also since I haven’t done this for a while, I figure I should add it again.  Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters technically, they’re from AU’s I don’t own but they are also changed from they’re source, they only mimic the AU in backstory. Liberties have been taken for entertainment purposes as this is fan fiction basically and you can find the original non-changed and non-RP version of them by looking them up in google or something.  FIRST, PREVIOUS, NEXT, INFO
The skeleton scratched the side of his head with a finger stressfully, he was feeling the fear rise, and flashing red lights weren’t helping. Warning signals everywhere trying to warn him of ‘’Danger Imminent’’, even appearing in large red letters on the small screen, flashing away. ‘’Damn it I already know, just let me think’’, his mind was feeling cluttered with all the background noises and images, he had to cool down the core of the device before it exploded. Dropping the device on the table near the window he ran over towards the couch in front of the TV, where lots of tools were scattered, some on the floor, some on the couch and some in the crevices between cushions. Without checking which of them he was picking up, he quickly put together three different screwdrivers in his hands and ran back to the device, which he could feel heating up as he picked it up. He turned the device over and quickly jammed one of the three screwdrivers in a screw, trying to twist but finding it had no grip as the screwdriver didn’t fit, ‘’C’mon!!’’ he yelled as he threw it away and tried again with the second one, but it was only a repeat and another one went flying. The skeleton’s breathing was getting faster as panic was taking over, ‘’This better be it’’. With a shaky hand he inserted the third screwdriver, a smile appearing as he got it to fit in and start turning. A few rushed turns later the screw fell out, and another and another until finally the back of the device came off, which he was thankful for as it’s weight was starting to take a toll on his weary bones. ‘’Alright, we’re close, just got to move this wire over there…’’, he spoke to himself as he pulled out a yellow wire and plugged it into a different socket, and then completely removed a green wire from its socket, and then suddenly all the red flashing and loud warning signs stop, he turned it over to find a black screen. The skeleton let out a nervous laugh as he relaxed slightly, ‘’Heh good thing th-‘’ Suddenly a quick succession of beeps came out of the device and his eyes widened, ‘’Oh sh-‘’. Then suddenly an explosion erupted, and the only sound that was heard was a BOOM and shattered glass.
‘’God damn it Sci, here we are again’’. The skeleton sighed, he was currently sitting in his landlord’s office at her desk, watching the rabbit monster pace back and forwards over and over again, ‘’Sorry Brenda, didn’t really expect that to happen you know?’’ Brenda gave a frustrated growl towards him, ‘’Yeah, you never do, always build first, worry about OH&S later, how the hell didn’t you see this coming with an explosion like that, you took out your whole apartment.’’ Sci scratched the back of his head nervously, looking guilty, it really didn’t help that his clothes and face were black from the smoke and ash, ‘’Well uh the device was just something simple I created, I didn’t even think it was capable of such um damage.’’ She suddenly gave him a very angry and intense stare that caused him to physically gulp, he never liked being up against this look, it never bode well for him. ‘’Oh really? You didn’t think it had the capability? What the fuck were you making?!’’ He looked nervous, ‘’Um well… perhaps a… toaster?’’ ‘’Sci you better not be screwing with me!’’ He shook his head now, ‘’N-no it’s true, but not an ordinary toaster, one that uses thirty different scanners and few… other things that connect directly to a screen to give you instantaneous feedback on how well it’s cooked so it would be perfect for whoever uses it.’’ Brenda raised an eye brow at him, watching his expression and noticing the slight hesitation which gave her a theory, ‘’You know, I may not look it, but I’m smarter than the average bear. There is no way you could’ve made an explosion that badly with a simple electrical device, what else did you put in there?’’ This caused some panic on the skeleton, ‘’Uh just some other things to make it regulate temperature, especially in the core of it all…’’. ‘’Let me guess, a bunch of chemicals that aren’t completely safe… you got them from the lab, didn’t you?’’ His sudden frozen look was all the confirmation she needed, ‘’You weren’t meant to take these specific ones, were you?’’ ‘’N-no I’m sorry, yeah I used some things I shouldn’t have… but it’ll be ok right?’’ With this Brenda went silent and sighed, almost twenty awkward seconds of silence passed, ‘’I’m sorry too Sci, but I’m going to have to evict you.’’ ‘’What?! But… you can’t do that.’’ She nodded and crossed her arms, her expression had grown a lot softer now, which almost worried him more. ‘’It’s the only way, you can’t keep this up.’’ ‘’But it’s never been this bad before, this was my first big major issue, right?’’ he said as a growing worry was showing his voice. ‘’That’s the problem, it’s only escalating, it could get so much worse.’’ ‘’Can’t the company just pay for this repair?’’ ‘’Yeah they will, but after this there is no way they’re going to keep funding your accommodation and even then your stunts are making me lose customers, I can’t afford going out of business’’, she sighed once more, and gave Sci a look, showing that she didn’t want to have to do this. ‘’Is there anyway I can make it up to you, one more way to get a last chance?’’, he said pleadingly. ‘’No…honestly Sci I like you, I like you quite a lot, you’ve helped out a ton with your expertise and you’re a good friend, which is why you’ve stayed this long… and also why I’m going to falsify the report to your workplace, so you can keep your damn job. But I can’t keep it going on like this, I’m sorry, I want you to understand it’s not easy for me to make a decision like this’’. Sci nodded in acceptance, she was right, this was actually going to happen, he’d stuffed it up and he was going to have to accept the consequences. ‘’I… I understand, sorry, I’ll get what’s left of my stuff tonight and leave.’’ ‘’Do you need any help, I’ve got some friends who might take you in temporarily?’’, but the skeleton shook his head and took out his phone. ‘’No, but thanks for the offer. I’ll be good from here’’, he offered her a kind smile, ‘’No hard feelings here’’. She shook her head with a faint smile, ‘’No hard feelings here either, just stay safe, one of these days I swear, you’re gonna get worse than scorch marks.’’ She chuckled as she drew a line through the ash on his cheek, she then looked at her finger before rubbing it on her pants. ‘’If you need anything, you call me alright?’’ Sci nodded, ‘’You to, especially if something of yours goes toast’’. Brenda shook her head at the pun as he headed to the exit door, ‘’You know I’m gonna take you up on that offer, right?’’ The skeleton nodded with a slight laugh, ‘’Yeah of course, got a friend’s deal for you, about 5 grand per item I reckon’’. With this the rabbit monster rolled her eyes and gave him the middle finger before leaving. Sci now left alone in the dark office, he looked at his phone and went down the contact list. No not his Paps, he couldn’t move out of home and  move back in, plus with him having disappeared for… quite a while, he had learned to become much more independent without him, although it was good for Paps to mature. His Alphys was overseas working on something, maybe it would’ve been a good idea if he went with her, can’t very well keep her from here, not easily anyway. ‘’Grillby might be…’’ Sci’s mind flashed to the shit he was going to get from his counterpart there and without even giving time for his mind to think any other thought, he moved the contacts down a few more people before he came across another Alphys, Glitch to be precise. ‘’Heh, maybe she’ll help out, hopefully I won’t be to much of a bother, although knowing her, she’ll probably fake being ok with it anyway’’. With that he pressed the call button, and listened to rhythmic rings, waiting for someone to pick up.
 Sci stood outside the front gate, a concerned expression as he wondered if this house could even support another person living in it, surely even an extra bone of his was going to cause the whole place to come down, let alone himself and the two suitcases he brought with him. ‘’Well I guess I can’t talk, my old place is a little worse off now’’. That thought pushing him on, he chuckled as he opened the gate and walked towards the front door, hearing the creaking of the wooden porch. The skeleton started to feel some form of weird feeling inside his soul, as if he was starting to feel ill in the gut, but he couldn’t work out why, perhaps it was butterflies in his stomach, he had nothing to worry about, nothing to fear, it was just Alphys after all. Bone made contact with the door and a loud knock was made in the hope of gaining the attention of the house’s resident, and it wasn’t long before he knew it had done it’s intended purpose as he heard very fast footsteps, Alphys must either be very excited or very nervous, he instantly assumed the latter. Sci’s expression suddenly turned taken aback and confused and obviously his greeter noticed as a giggle came from the goat child in front of the skeleton. A few silent seconds passed before Asgore spoke, ‘’Heh, it’s nice to see you to Sci, how you doing’’? Sci shook his head and gave a curious smile, this was a bit different than he was expecting, ‘’Oh sorry, nice to see you as well, it’s been a while… what are you doing here? It’s getting a bit late, didn’t realise you two were close enough to have sleep overs’’. Asgore shook his head with a grin as he was obviously expecting this reaction, ‘’I’m um actually living here’’ ‘’L-living here?! Permanently? Gaster was ok with that?’’ Sci did the skeleton equivalent of an eyebrow raise as he wondered what the hell could’ve caused a situation like this, but he couldn’t complain, the more the merrier, and he enjoyed Asgore’s company at least. ‘’Yeah it’s all good, I’ve been living here for about a… a week huh? A week really goes by quick. Anyway yeah, so I guess we’ll be housemates for a while!’’, the goat child seemed to be quite happy as he moved out of the way of the door to let Sci in, an opportunity he took quickly, closing the door behind him. ‘’Well I guess you’ll be able to show me around since you’re experienced with the place’’, the skeleton said as he put down his stuff next to the front door, he would put it away later. The kid started to lead the guest to the kitchen, ‘’Well I’ll leave that to Alphys, she seemed incredibly excited to have you over.’’ Sci scratched back of his head with a nervous laugh, ‘’Really? That’s not what I was expecting… that’s nice I suppose.’’ ‘’Yeah, I think she really wanted to show off the small lab she has in the basement, I don’t think showing it to me had the effect she desired, most of it went over my head’’, Asgore chuckled as he got out a pot and started to fill it with water under the sink tap. ‘’Oh, I see, I’m actually interested in checking that out now, I wonder what she managed to fit inside? Speaking of her, where is she at the moment?’’ Asgore thought for a second before responding, ‘’She’s out getting dinner, think we’re just having some chicken and stuff? Can’t quite remember’’. He grinned, the kid was glad that Alphys wasn’t here right now, otherwise she would’ve insisted on serving the tea because she was their host, but it was his turn and he was going to deliver a good impression with this. Asgore moved the half full put over to the stove and turned the gas on, and in an action that frightened Sci for a second, he stuck his paw into the stove and then suddenly there was fire. The goat quickly pulled his hand out before it got to hot for him and turned to Sci, seeing a bigger smile appear on the skeleton filled with curiosity, ‘’Been learning some new tricks kid?’’ Asgore gave a slightly proud smile, not that he felt he had much to be proud about, ‘’Uh yeah, I’ve umm been practising this…’’, He raised his paw up and after a couple of seconds of concentration, light blue flames danced around it, like his paw was a match. ‘’Looking very nice, seems a little… familiar though.’’ Asgore gave a shy smile, ‘’Yeah we did think that as well, can’t give you a reason why though, but it’s cooler than orange… anyways there’s not much to be super impressed with, I can’t throw it and it’s not the hottest thing in the world, no where near Tori or anything.’’ Sci shrugged, ‘’Hey I’m sure you’ll get there kid, just keep working on it and soon enough you’ll be flinging fire like the best of them… flinging safely of course’’. The two of them gave small laughs as Asgore opened a packet of Golden Flower Tea, preparing for use. Sci gave a small sigh and then seemed to start examining Asgore, before finally resting on a joking grin. ‘’Guess you’re starting to grow up, aren’t you? Although… I don’t think you’ve got any taller.’’ Asgore crossed his arms and glared at Sci, ‘’People change greatly over two years and one of those great changes is my height. The Asgore you knew probably was a midget compared to me!’’ Sci laughed and shrugged, he was aware people change over large amounts of time, he knew better than most. Also, while he was mostly just trying to tease the boy, he honestly couldn’t really see much of a difference, perhaps he was just unobservant. Before Sci could try and give Asgore another fun verbal jab, the two of them turned as they heard the front door open and the goat gave a smile, ‘’Hey Al, he’s here!’’
’’Well at least this guy might actually be helpful, we don’t need another freeloader’’, Alphys sighed as the voice already started to complain, although it didn’t bring her down whatsoever, ‘’Asgore is a welcome addition to this place, ok?’’. The voice made a noise to show they didn’t care about arguing anymore, and she was fine with that. The lizard put her shopping bags next the her new guests suitcases and then sped walked to the kitchen swiftly, a big smile on her face as she entered, ‘’Hey Sci, W-welcome!!’’. Sci smiled as Alphys came over and hugged him, he returned the favour with his arms, although he still felt a little awkward doing it. She moved back and the two guys both noticed she seemed fidgety, although it was obviously more of an excited happy fidgety rather than one from pure nervousness, although that temporarily disappeared as she gave a squinty look at Asgore, and he gave back a slightly guilty shrug, ‘’The Golden Flower Tea’s already out Al, I got this one, leave the greeting tea to me’’. Alphys’ expression returned to what it was before as she turned back to Sci, ‘’S-sorry I uh wasn’t h-here when you a-arrived, but I g-got dinner, going to try and c-cook some ch-chicken and-‘’ ‘’It’s alright Al, glad to see you, how’re you?’’ Alphys was tapping her hands together, a nervous smile appearing, ‘’Oh uh I-I’m fine, j-just h-happy th-that you made it, I’m uh g-going to make sure y-you’re comfortable and such…,’’ She seemed to sweat slightly as she seemed to have some sort of realisation, ‘’Oh g-gosh s-sorry, I’m b-being a real suck u-up aren’t I? J-just make y-yourself at home, d-do whatever y-you want’’. The shy monster looked a little confused as Asgore and Sci shared a look and a grin before turning back to her, they seemed to have some mutual thought that made her a little worried. ‘’Hey Al, is there anything you want to do?’’, Sci gave a knowing smile and suddenly Alphys seemed to get super nervous, ‘’Oh uh n-nothing, I’m h-happy t-to just ummm chill and stuff…?’’ Asgore now decided to pitch in, a similar grin to the skeleton appearing, ‘’Are you sure you don’t want give Sci a tour of the place… perhaps somewhere in particular?’’ Suddenly the lizard realised what they meant and she proceeded to give Asgore another small glare before looking up at Sci, her hands balled up in front of her face and the fidgeting got a little more intense, ‘’Ok ummm I-I could sh-sh-show you… uh only i-if you w-want, n-no need to umm… feel p-pressure or anything, y-you don’t n-need to e-even w-‘’ Sci decided it was best to interrupt before she had a verbal implosion, ‘’Yes Alphys, I would like to see your lab, right now if you wish’’. She stared up at him for a few seconds as he simply gave her a nod. Before in almost in an instant, Alphys grabbed Sci’s hand and dragged him off quickly out of the room, Asgore was certain if he’d blinked, he would’ve thought the two of them had disappeared into the very thin air that was left before them.
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