#i swear that this is not just another matrix allegory
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vizthedatum · 2 years ago
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If gender is a construct, then I'm choosing my own construct, and I'm telling everyone.
But I do wonder... what's out there beyond any one construct? Is it something that we can't even perceive?
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missluthorwillseeyounow · 1 year ago
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Pain.
Kara thought she’d felt pain before, but it was nothing like this. It feels magnified a hundred thousand times. Every nerve ending seems to scream in excruciating agony.
As the other tubes unlatch and eject themselves from her spine and her limbs, the pain becomes too much. Kara blacks out.
She gains one small moment of consciousness, where she can open her eyes and lift her head weakly. She can feel hands supporting her, lifting her. A scratchy blanket that abrades her sensitive skin is wrapped around her shoulders.
Lights swim in her vision like starbursts, and she can vaguely make out shapes. She tries to focus… gains one moment to see as clearly as she can, and is rewarded by a welcome sight.
What she doesn’t know is that this is the first sight of another human that her eyes — her true eyes — have ever beheld.
Lena smiles at her softly. “Welcome to the real world, Kara.”
Matrix AU, Part II
In the middle of a lunch date — in which they had been discussing Plato’s allegory, which Lena had gifted to Kara at their last meeting — Lena’s phone rings.
“We’ve got trouble.” Brainy’s usual flat tone is pitched higher than usual. “Four agents incoming. The signature on one of them is familiar. I believe it may be your brother.”
Lena curses under her breath, her gaze slanting toward Kara, who is looking at her with confusion and concern. “Where are they?”
“Two of them just entered the building. One is on the fifth floor, but the signature that’s registering as your brother’s is coming up on your floor now. He’s still in the elevator, so that should give you less than five minutes. If you can get to the parking lot in the basement, Jack and Nia have gone in as back-up.”
“Aren’t there any L-Phones in the building?”
“The agents are destroying the extraction versions as we speak.”
Again Lena curses, louder this time, her frustration mounting. Damn that Lex, he always was a thorn on her side. “Alright. Stay on the line.”
Lena rises from the couch, and immediately crosses to her desk, withdrawing a new prototype headset for the phones from a secret drawer. As she puts them on, Kara follows her, her trademark crinkle prominent on her forehead.
“Lena? What’s going on? Are you okay?”
Lena ignores her for a half-second, long enough to close the blinds around her office and get to the doors. Both women are facing the elevators, so they both see when the suited Agent walks through.
Lex’s face is impassive at first, but when he sees Lena and Kara, his face contorts into a smirk. He stalks toward Lena’s office, gaining speed as he goes. Lena manages to close the doors just before he reaches them, and she shuts them in her brother’s snarling face.
“Holy shit — Lena, who the hell was that???”
Lena exhales deeply, as she turns to face Kara for the first time since the phone call. Kara’s face has shock and confusion written all over it. “That was my brother.”
“Your brother— What??!”
Lena sighs. “I’m so sorry, Kara. I wish it didn’t have to happen like this. I don’t know if you’re ready for this, but I’m afraid we’re running out of time. There are things I wish I could say to you, but I can’t. All I can tell you is that right now, you’re in great danger.”
“Danger—? What?? From your brother? B-but why?” She looks beyond Lena to the closed doors.
“We don’t have much time.” Lena gathers Kara’s hands in hers and meets her eyes. “I swear to you, Kara, I will not let them hurt you. But for me to keep you safe, I need you to trust me.”
“Safe? Safe from what? Lena, what the hell is going on??”
Kara is panicking, and Lena can’t blame her, so she does the only thing that she knows can ground Kara. She slips her hands through Kara’s hair and cups her cheeks, holding her in place so that she can meet Lena’s eyes. And like always the tactile Kara stills at the touch.
Determined green meets frightened blue, and Kara’s exhale feeds into Lena’s next breath. “Do you trust me, Kara?”
She can feel Kara swallow under her fingers, but her answer comes quick. She nods, her head still trapped between Lena’s palms.
“I do.”
Lena exhales in relief. “Then stay close to me, and do exactly as I say.”
She lets go of Kara long enough to pull the office doors open.
But instead of opening into Lex’s snarling face, the doors open into the basement parking lot.
Kara’s mouth drops open as she looks from the sunny interior of Lena’s top-floor office, to the dim grey concrete of L-Corp’s basement parking lot. “What the heck???”
Lena pays no heed to her shock. She speaks into the mouthpiece. “Brainy, updates?”
“There are now agents all over the building. Seven in total. Street level is clear so far. Jack and Nia should be—“
The sound of a speeding car grows louder, and Kara looks up to see a black Bugatti heading right for them. Kara backs up quickly, pulling Lena along with her, but the car skids to a stop right in front of them, passenger side, its brakes screeching.
“—there any second.” Brainy finishes on the other line. Lena opens the doors and ushers Kara in. Kara only complies because it's Lena, but her confusion grows as she sees the car’s occupants.
The two people inside are dressed in all black, sunglasses covering their eyes. The driver, however, whips them off with a huge grin. Kara sees a young girl — probably twenty-two, twenty-three? — with bright, impish eyes. She shoots Lena and Kara a brilliant smile. “Hiya, really honored to meet you, Kara! Can I call you Kara?”
“Perhaps you could skip the introductions,” her companion, a man with a beard and a slight English accent, drawls lightly, “and floor it!”
“Right! Yeah, sorry! Where to, boss?” Nia looks through the rear view mirror at Lena. She’s already accelerating out of the parking lot before Lena can even reply. The car screeches dangerously, but they make it out to street level intact.
“Catco will be the safest place. The agents can’t get in there.”
The man in the passenger seat turns. “We can’t do an extraction at Catco, the program won’t let us. We should head to the hospital.”
Lena shakes her head. “That’ll be the first place they’ll look. Catco’s the only place they can’t go.”
“They’ll have Catco surrounded then.” The man gestures at Kara. “She’ll be trapped there.”
“I’m afraid Lena’s right.” Brainy pipes up through the headset. “There are already five agents at the hospital.”
Lena curses, her frustration mounting. “The children? And the other minds?”
“All safe, all evacuated as per protocol. Lar Gand switched the codes. As of now, it’s nothing but an empty office building. Rhea has gone to head Lex and the other agents off. She’ll keep them busy long enough for the facility to be relocated.”
“Good—“
Kara can’t keep it in any longer. “EXCUSE ME, BUT WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE??”
Everyone turns to her at her outburst. Nia watches her warily from the rear view mirror. “Who are you people? What the fuck is this? Lena?”
She turns to Lena, her eyes wild and confused. Lena holds up her hands to mollify her, and her heart sinks when Kara backs away from her slightly, leaning against the leather of the seat.
“I’m sorry, Kara. I know you must have a lot of questions. This is Jack” she points to the man in the passenger seat who gives her a small salute. “That’s Nia” the young driver gives her a winning smile. “And the person I’m talking to on the phone is Brainy, he’s our operator. They’re all allies. Our priority right now is to get you to a safe place. They’re coming after you—“
“Who’s they? Why are they coming after me? I’m nobody!”
“That’s not true, Kara.” Lena shakes her head vehemently. “You’re extraordinary. And if the Oracle is right, then you might just be the most important person in the whole Matrix.”
“Oracle — What?”
“I believe you know her as Cat Grant.”
“Cat— my boss??”
“Yes. She...” Lena’s lips quirk into a small, wry smile. “Let’s just say she knows a lot of things.”
“I don’t understand.” Kara shakes her head, her jaw still slack in shock and confusion as they speed through the streets of National City. “What the fuck is going on…?”
Lena draws just a little bit closer, trying to get Kara to meet her eyes. “Listen, Kara. I know there’s a lot going on, and this is a lot to process. I wish we had more time. I truly wish I could make this easy for you, but the truth is never an easy thing.”
“The truth? What truth?”
Lena opens her mouth to speak, but she’s cut off by Brainy yelling through the headset. “Incoming!”
That’s all the warning they get before the first bullet fires. Lena processes the first click, and ducks, pulling Kara down with her. Kara screams, but the bullet hits the rear window of the Bugatti and misses her head.
“Shit! Stay down!” Nia yells as she swerves to avoid the barrage of bullets coming at them. “Brainy, you couldn’t have given me more of a head’s up??”
“They came out of nowhere! Watch out, you’ve got another coming on your six.”
Nia swerves again, jolting everyone in the car. She speeds up like a bat outta hell and puts a truck between her and their attackers. Three seconds later, the truck is bearing down on them, right on their tail, nearly clipping the back of the car.
“Are you kidding me?” Nia grits through her teeth as she watches the truck get closer. She stomps on the accelerator, but the truck follows them doggedly. “Brainy, I can’t shake these guys! I’m gonna need an exit or back-up, whatever, just give me something!”
“Working on it! Just hold on for one… more… second…”
From Kara’s vantage point near the floor, she sees the man on the passenger side — Jack, Lena had said — straighten up and lithely maneuver his upper body out the window. She hears more gunshots, this time louder, and sees him leveling a gun at the truck driver.
Beside her, Kara sees Lena lift her skirt high enough to expose a holster on her thigh. How she had even hidden it there, Kara has no idea. Clearly, there’s a lot she doesn’t know about her new friend.
As Kara gapes, Lena draws a smaller gun from the holster. In between gunshots, Lena straightens up and fires at the vehicles following them.
Suddenly, Kara hears the roaring noise of what can only be a motorcycle engine blaring right beside them.
She lifts her head just enough to see a lean figure riding a Ducati streak past them in a blur of black and silver. The bike swerves right behind them, effectively cutting them off from the truck. The dark figure pulls out a gun and blows out the truck’s two front tires.
“YES!” Nia yelps from the front seat. She speeds up, putting more distance between them and the truck. “Brainy, you glorious little genius, I could kiss you!”
There’s a cough from Lena’s headset. “I-um — Well, yes, uh—“
“Get us to Catco, Brainy.” Lena interrupts, holstering her gun back under her skirt as the truck recedes into the distance. The bike follows them.
“Uh, yes, of course.” Brainy clears his throat. “Take Exit 2B and turn right. Take Delacourt, there’s traffic on Ayala Street. You should get to Catco in under 5 minutes with Nia’s driving.”
“We’ll be there in under three. Whooo!!!” Nia whoops.
She’s just as good as her promise, practically making the car jump into Catco’s basement parking lot with its speed. She screeches to a stop in front of the elevator, and the bike skids up right next to them.
The dark figure on the bike lifts their helmet off, and Kara is scrambling out of the car before she even knows it.
Her red hair is shorter than Kara remembers, shorter than she’s ever seen it, and cropped close to her head. Her face is sharper, too — cheekbones more prominent, and her eyes glinting with an edge Kara has never seen before.
But Kara would know her anywhere.
“Alex??”
That grin is all Alex, still familiar despite all the changes, and Kara launches herself at her sister. “Alex! You’re okay! You’re alive!!”
A laugh rumbles in Alex’s leather-clad chest. “I told you I was.”
“What happened to you??” Kara pulls away a little, but keeps her grip on Alex’s sleeves. “Do you know how long I’ve been looking for you? How devastated Mom has been? You’ve been gone for a year, Alex!”
“I know,” Alex looks away and sighs. “I didn’t want to leave you like that, but I had to. I wish I could explain—“
“And I wish everyone would stop saying that, and just explain it to me!” Kara lets go of her sister’s arm and twists around to look at Lena. Alex and Lena exchange looks, and Kara’s anger rises.
They know each other, her sister and her friend.
A pang of hurt and betrayal lances through Kara’s chest. Lena had known all this time where Alex was, and she never told Kara. Her eyes meet Lena’s, and she sees the guilt and contrition in shimmering green. She looks away and meets Alex’s, sees the same there.
“I want answers. I think I deserve that much.”
“Indeed you do.”
All their heads snap toward the intercom at the sound of Cat’s voice. “And this is a good place to find them.”
Across the parking lot, the elevator doors slide open, inviting them in. “Unfortunately, in most cases, answers just lead to more questions.”
They find Cat at the top floor in her familiar crystalline office, seated on her wingback chair like a queen on her throne. Her hands form a steeple under her chin, and she smirks when the five of them enter the room.
“Well, well. Isn’t this a motley crew?”
She surveys them, the queen looking out at her subjects. “Half of the Daxam, and half of the Manhunter. Such an assembly for just one extraction.”
Lena steps forward, meeting Cat’s gaze boldly. “We were followed by agents.”
“Don’t tell me you’re getting slow, Lena.”
Green eyes narrow, but Lena refuses to rise to the bait. “I programmed L-Corp myself. They shouldn’t have been able to catch our trail. Someone must have tipped them off.”
“Perhaps you have a rat in your ship.” Cat gives her a knowing look. “Or perhaps, you should’ve followed my advice, Lena dear… I told you — mind that soft heart of yours. It is both your biggest weakness and your greatest strength.”
A muscle twitches in Lena’s jaw, but she doesn’t look away from the older woman. It’s Cat who breaks their stare down first, looking simultaneously proud and amused. She sighs dramatically.
“Still, you managed to reach me and invoke sanctuary, which is a far better outcome than the alternative. And young Kara here will need to be debriefed on the situation.” Cat rises regally from her chair and rounds the table. She stops in front of Lena and levels her with a strict look coupled with a raised eyebrow.
“I’ll remind you that this is neutral ground. You cannot extract anyone, not even a Potential, in my territory. Understood?” When Lena nods, Cat tips her chin up imperiously.
“Very well. I’ll leave you to it. The rest of you peons, follow me.”
“I hate it when she calls us that.” Nia grumbles under her breath. The others file out of Cat’s office without complaint, leaving Kara and Lena in the first awkward silence they’ve had in the entire time they’ve been friends.
Lena gestures towards Cat’s couches and sits down on one of them. When Kara deliberately sits on the opposite couch, she tries not to let it show how much it stings. Instead, she folds her hands on her lap and tries to figure out where to begin.
“I know you must have a lot of questions, Kara…”
“That’s putting it mildly.” Kara scoffs. “But my biggest question is, how could you not tell me about my sister?”
“I’m sorry, Kara,” Lena hangs her head. “I couldn’t tell you about her without telling you everything. The most I could do was guide the way. The truth is, this is bigger than your sister, bigger than you and me.”
“Alex was investigating Jeremiah’s disappearance.” Kara forces herself to meet Lena’s eyes, to try and find any lie in them. “Did you have anything to do with that? Did you have anything to do with Alex’s disappearance? What about those patients who died at the Luthor Family Hospital? What about the kids, Lena?”
“I swear to you, I wasn’t behind your father’s disappearance.” Lena opens her palms up in a gesture of transparency. “As for the children, they’re safe, and I would rather die than harm any of them.”
“But you are doing something to them at that hospital? Something illegal, otherwise those FBI agents wouldn’t be after you.”
“It’s easy to call anything illegal if you’re the one setting the rules.” Lena murmurs darkly. “I’m not hurting anyone at the hospital, Kara. I promise you. I’m preparing them.”
She takes a deep breath, struggles to find the words to explain. “I built the hospital specifically for people whose minds were ready — to find them, to offer them shelter and safety. I give them a place where they can prepare themselves and find the answers without the threat of agents coming after them. Your sister found me because she was ready.”
Kara frowns. “Ready for what?”
“For the truth.” Lena replies simply. “To wake up and leave the lie behind.”
“The lie?” Lena’s words bring back echoes of Alex’s message. The Matrix still has you… You’ll find me, if you’re ready to wake up. “You mean… the Matrix?”
“Yes.”
Kara leans forward, her attention caught. “What is the Matrix?”
Lena sighs, her eyes clouding over. “I’m afraid no one can be told what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself. Right now, all I can tell you is that the Matrix is everywhere. It’s all around us. It’s in the air we breathe, in everything we touch…”
Lena ventures a hand between them to touch Kara’s, their hands connecting in the slightest. And even though she knows that she’s not really touching Kara’s hand, her mind feeds her the sensations of it — the softness of Kara’s skin, the gentle press of her flesh under Lena’s fingers.
Lena draws her hand away, and Kara follows it avidly with her eyes. “For you to know what the Matrix is, I have to go back to the beginning. Or at least, to where it begins for us.”
She tilts her head, waiting for Kara’s permission to continue. When Kara nods, Lena takes a deep breath.
“About ten years before I was born, there was a young girl. Everyone thought she was just an ordinary teenager — exceptionally smart, but no different from other girls her age... Except she was far from ordinary. She could see things others couldn’t. She saw the world around her in a different way, and that made her very dangerous.”
Lena meets Kara’s eyes, and the intensity of that clear green gaze captivates Kara. “The Matrix decided this girl was dangerous to its continued existence and function, so she was taken away, trapped in a place between the Matrix and the real world.”
Lena clasps her hands together to steady them. “They call it the Phantom Zone. I…. I can’t tell you what it’s like. I’ve been fortunate enough that I’ve never been there. But we’re told that it’s a place where nothing exists. No people, no hope, no time, no escape. Everything is frozen in a sea of nothingness.”
Kara’s heart begins to pound, and she swallows thickly as she listens to Lena’s story. “The girl was forced to wait there all alone for years — lonely, scared and confused — waiting for a rescue that couldn’t come.”
The more Lena talks, the darker Kara’s eyes become, until they’re a stormy blue. Kara begins shaking her head, the crinkle on her brow growing.
“It wasn’t until years later that she was freed because of an anomaly. A glitch in the Matrix that caused an opposite reaction, thereby freeing her.” Lena’s hands tighten as her brother’s menacing face hidden by dark sunglasses flashes across her vision.
“But when she came back… she knew something was wrong. The world felt different to her. As if she didn’t fit into it right anymore. Not just because her parents weren’t there anymore. It was all of it. The whole world looked wrong, felt wrong. Like waking up from one dream into another.”
Across from her, Kara is listening to her with a look of dawning horror on her face. Her eyes have gained a wild look to them, and she’s pulled her hand away from Lena’s.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Kara mutters, shaking her head over and over. Lena watches her, knowing the eventual fallout that is sure to follow. Kara jumps up, off the couch and away from Lena. “You don’t know what you’re talking about!”
Lena tries to be the calming presence in the room, but she knows this is an impossibility. She tries anyway. “But I do, Kara. I wish I didn’t, but I know exactly what I’m talking about.”
“I’m leaving.” The words are final, exploding from Kara’s lips with a cry, but her voice shakes. She backs away from Lena, stalking toward the door. “I don’t know what game you’re playing here, but I don’t want any part of it!!!”
“You feel it, don’t you? You always have.”
Kara stops, but she doesn’t turn around. Her hands are tight at her sides.
Lena rises from her seat, facing Kara, willing her to turn. Her eyes bore into Kara’s back. “You feel how wrong all of this is. The way this place clouds your eyes, making you blind. The wrongness of it feels like a violation, like something eating you from the inside out. The way it feels like you’re suffocating in place while the world spins out of your control… You are not meant for this place, Kara, and you know it. Just as I did, a long time ago.”
Across the room, Kara holds her body so rigidly that she trembles from it.
“If you walk out of here, they will come for you, Kara. And I don’t know what they’ll do to you. You’ve always been too dangerous to stay here, the things you could be capable of… they’re afraid of it. Of you. I can’t make you stay, but I can’t protect you if you don’t trust me.”
“How can I trust you? After everything you’ve hidden from me?” Kara turns her head toward Lena in the slightest, her eyes burning.
Lena steps closer, her voice soft. “Because you know me, Kara… Despite all of my secrets, all of the things I couldn’t tell you, despite what you might believe now— I have always been myself with you.”
She approaches Kara slowly, and despite her rigid posture, the other woman lets her. When Lena is close enough to touch, Kara turns resolutely away.
“You wanted to know what the Matrix is? I can’t give you the answer.” Lena murmurs, her soft breath sending shivers down Kara’s spine. “I can show you the way, but you have to make the choice yourself.”
Kara’s jaw twitches. “And what choice is that?”
A small slip of paper slides from Lena’s hand into Kara’s at her side. “The choice to see the truth. To be free.”
Her fingers tighten reflexively around the card, but she deliberately refuses to read what’s on it.
Lena’s voice is little more than a whisper in Kara’s ear. “You’ll know where to find me.”
They lose Kara as soon as she exits Catco, just as Lena had expected. The others meet up with her at one of Lena’s safe houses across the city.
“You let her leave?!” Alex hisses incredulously. “What the hell, Luthor? Are you telling me my sister is out there, alone, with God knows how many agents on her tail?”
Lena returns Alex’s glare with a serene gaze. “She’ll be back. I know she will.”
“How the hell do you know that, huh? Are you saying you know my sister better than I do?”
Lena refuses to back down to Alex’s intimidating glare. It’s only been a year, but Alex has proven herself to be one of the most competent — and argumentative — people Lena has ever met. There’s a reason Alex has risen to be the Manhunter’s first mate and J’onn’s second-in-command so quickly. The woman is an excellent strategist, and an efficient soldier.
But Lena has been doing this for far longer.
“Alex.” Lena warns, just a hint of chastisement in her voice, and the redhead exhales and drops her head, wiping at her face in frustration.
“I’m sorry, it’s just… that’s my baby sister. And she’s out there, being targeted by agents.”
“I know,” Lena keeps her tone as even and patient as she can. “But this is a choice Kara needs to make herself. I know what she knows, Alex. I’ve been there too. You found the truth because you were looking for your father. But Kara… She knew the truth long before you did. She’s always known, she just has to choose to accept it.”
“You mean, that story you told—“
Lena nods. “I believe that, like me, Kara is a Potential. She might even have been the first one, but she was trapped by the machines into the Phantom Zone to decommission her. And unlike me, she didn’t have anyone to guide her or pull her out of the Matrix.”
Rhea’s face comes to mind, and Lena takes a deep breath. God knows what would’ve happened to her if Rhea hadn’t found and extracted her first.
Alex is still frowning. “Then how did she get out?”
Lena looks away, her jaw tight. “I think… I think it was Lex. The moment he was reinserted into the Matrix, he caused an anomaly in the program, opening a rift between it and the Phantom Zone. That provided an extraction point, and she could’ve gone either to the real world or the Matrix. But her mind wasn’t ready yet, so she was brought back to the Matrix instead.”
“So all this time…” There’s a war raging in Alex’s eyes, realization and guilt darkening her gaze, until she steels herself. When she looks back up at Lena, her eyes are clear and resolute.
“How do we get her back?”
It’s Nia who answers her.
“Uh, guys…? You might not have to.” She looks up from where she’s talking to her L-phone. “Kelly just told me Kara’s on her way.”
As if on cue, a knock sounds from the other side of the door, and all four of them turn toward it.
“Are we sure it’s Kara?” Jack mutters lowly, his gun already drawn. “It could be an agent. What does Brainy say?”
“It’s her.” Lena assures him.
She crosses the threshold to open the door, but nothing prepares her for what’s waiting outside.
Kara is leaning heavily against the door frame, her face pale. Blood, a lot of it, is dripping from a wound in her belly that’s glowing an ominous green. Lena inhales sharply, shock and fear paralyzing her for a moment.
“You told me to come find you,” is all Kara is able to say before she sags away from the door and into Lena’s arms. Lena catches her, and she feels the wetness of Kara’s blood seeping into her own clothes. Her heart jumps to her throat, constricting her breath.
Alex is at the door in an instant, and between the two of them, they carry Kara inside.
“Nia, clear the table. I have to check her wound.”
The young woman immediately complies, while Jack looks out the door to make sure Kara wasn’t followed. Lena stares at the crimson staining Kara’s front and hands. Her own hands tremble as she helps lay Kara down.
“Who did this to you?”
Kara groans as Alex positions her legs on the dining room table.”Your brother. Nice guy.”
Rage unlike anything she’s ever felt before flares in Lena’s gut, threatening to set her on fire. She is going to kill Lex.
“Lena, I need an extra set of hands.” Alex’s voice startles her, and she looks up to see Alex preparing an anesthetic for her sister. “Here, put pressure on the wound.”
Lena nods, grateful for a task to keep her mind focused. She accepts the gauze and pressing it to Kara’s stomach. Kara hisses in pain, and Lena winces in sympathy as she turns to Nia. “Tell Kelly to download instruction on surgical wound repair.”
Lena closes her eyes. Within seconds, Kelly has downloaded a medical residency’s worth of knowledge into Lena’s brain. She opens her eyes and looks down to reach for a scalpel, only to find Kara staring at her.
“Did you just—?“
“That looks more like a stab wound than a gunshot.” Alex mutters as she prepares the syringe. “What did he do, Kara? What did he stab you with?”
Kara turns away from Lena to look at her sister. She hisses when Alex injects her with the drug. “Some kind of… green glowy thing. It didn’t look like a knife, but I think the tip broke off inside me.”
Lena’s stomach sinks. “Alex… I think it’s a tracker.”
“Damn it! I really wanna punch your fucking brother, Lena.”
“Get in line.” Lena mutters darkly as she continues to press on Kara’s wound. The weak groan that Kara lets out makes Lena’s rage ignite, and it takes every ounce of her concentration to swallow her anger like bile and focus on staunching the wound.
Alex picks up a scalpel and looks back at her sister. “This is gonna hurt. I’m sorry.”
“Wait!” Kara grimaces as she tries to sit up. When Lena tries to help her back down, Kara places a hand over her wrist.
“I trust you, Lena.”
Blue eyes are clear and intent as they lock onto green. “Whatever it is you have to show me, whatever answers there are on the other side, I trust you. I’m ready.”
Everything else is forgotten.
Lex, the wound, the agents, the others around them — everything fades away, receding into the background. Lena keeps pressure on the wound, but she meets Kara’s eyes, searching them to see any trace of doubt or hesitation.
“Are you sure?”
Kara nods, her eyes bright. “I think this is the most sure I’ve been in a long time.”
Lena exhales, she can feel her hands trembling on Kara’s skin. “What made you change your mind?”
A lopsided grin twists Kara’s lips. “Your brother.”
“Lex?”
“Yeah.” Kara winces for a second, but her smile returns. “He tried to tell me all of these things about you. How you were a fugitive and a terrorist, how you were guilty of a laundry list of crimes. How you were using the hospital to traffic children, and how you were responsible for Alex’s disappearance.”
Lena huffs out a small incredulous laugh. “And that convinced you?”
“Yeah.” Kara laughs wetly, her voice barely above a whisper. “It convinced me that you were right. I do know you. And your brother’s a bald, arrogant, lying windbag.”
Lena smiles shakily. “He is.”
“Yeah, when I told him that to his face, he stabbed me. Can you believe it?” Kara gestures weakly to the wound on her stomach with the same lopsided grin. Despite the gravity and urgency of their situation, Lena feels a flood of affection and laughs.
Kara’s fingers close over Lena’s hands on her wound. “I’m ready, Lena.”
“Wait, now?”
Nia’s voice interrupts, jarring them both. Lena’s eyes snap to her, and Kara’s head rolls weakly to look at the young woman “You wanna do an extraction now? While we’ve got agents tracking us, and she’s freaking bleeding out all over the dining room floor??”
“Yes.”
Lena doesn’t know which one of them says it — Kara, or her, or both of them. Her eyes never leave Kara’s, even as she directs the others. “Jack, get me a kit, then secure the perimeter. Nia, connect me to Brainy, then call Kelly and tell them the Manhunter needs to be ready now.”
“Lena, she still has the tracker inside her! I can’t sew her up to stop the bleeding while it’s still in there!”
“You don’t have to.” Lena slants a glance at Alex. “We just have to get the tracker out and control the bleeding long enough for the extraction. Can you keep her stable until then?”
“I — Yeah.” Alex looks at her sister’s resolute face. “Yes, I can.”
“Nia, take over.” Lena motions for the younger woman to switch places with her putting pressure on the wound. The younger woman complies. Jack returns, placing a silver metal briefcase on the table next to Kara.
Kara winces, and Alex laughs shakily. “Trust you to do this in the most dramatic way possible.”
Kara laughs, but it turns into a cry of pain as pressure is placed off and on the wound. Lena brushes her hair away from her face, and Kara can feel her place something on her temples.
“Shh, Kara… I promise this will be over soon.” Lena continues putting her hands all over her. Electrodes, Kara realizes, as Lena sticks them in various spots all over her body.
“Brainy, I need a location now.” Lena snaps, and at first, Kara thinks she’s mad at her, but then she realizes that Lena is talking into that headset again. She wants to tell Lena something, but she can’t remember, and she feels foggy and clammy. Her eyelids fall shut.
“She’s tachycardic. She’s going into hypovolemic shock. We need to wake her up now!”
One second Kara is slipping into unconsciousness, and the next a violent shock courses through her whole body like a million volts of electricity. Pain grips her, and she finds herself paralyzed, her mouth falling open in an endless scream.
She screws her eyes shut in agony.
When she can finally open her eyes again, all Kara can see is red. Aqueous and thick, this red surrounds her on all sides. She’s submerged in it, is her first thought.
Her second thought gets overshadowed, swallowed up by her body’s realization that something is blocking her windpipe. She claws at it desperately, panicking.
In her desperation, she manages to wrap her hands around something metallic and cylindrical. She tugs, and the obstruction at her trachea dislodges an inch. Quickly, she pulls and pulls until she all but vomits up a black metallic tube that had been logged into her throat.
Kara tries to inhale a breath, but instead of air, she ingests more of the aqueous red. She lifts herself up, reaching for any kind of surface. When she finds it, she coughs, desperately trying to take in any oxygen. Her hands feel a solid surface and she latches on, trying to regain her breath and a sense of footing.
When she finally recovers enough to try and take stock of her surroundings, Kara looks up and realizes that she is as far from Lena’s dining room as she can get.
Wherever she is, it’s dark. The… vat? pod? she’s in emits a dim red light. Slowly, Kara’s eyes adjust and she perceives other similar red lights from pods around her. As her vision focuses, she realizes with slowly dawning horror that each pod contains a person.
A sick, oily feeling grows in her gut as she lifts her head, only to find more pods above her, each containing a human-looking inhabitant. Peeking over the pod she’s in, she sees more below her. As her eyes begin to adjust to the darkness, she can see that she’s surrounded by a vast array of dim red lights — each a pod containing humans. Hundreds. Thousands, as far as her eyes can see.
As she sloshes inside the thick red liquid around her, Kara takes stock of her body. There are other tubes attached to her, she realizes. To her horror, she finds tubes on her arms, legs and spine. Even at the back of her head.
Her skin prickles in horror and disgust. What the hell is this? What have they done to her?
Even as she touches the tube at the back of her head, a lock on it unlatches, and with a whirring mechanical sound, it ejects itself out of her head.
Pain.
Kara thought she’d felt pain before, but it was nothing like this. It feels magnified a hundred thousand times. Every nerve ending seems to scream in excruciating agony.
As the other tubes unlatch and eject themselves from her spine and limbs, the pain becomes too much. Kara blacks out.
She gains one small moment of consciousness, where she can open her eyes and lift her head weakly. She can feel hands supporting her, lifting her. A scratchy blanket that abrades her sensitive skin is wrapped around her shoulders.
Lights swim in her vision like starbursts, and she can vaguely make out shapes. She tries to focus, gains one moment to see as clearly as she can, and is rewarded by a welcome sight.
What she doesn’t know is that this is the first sight of another living human that her eyes — her true eyes — have ever beheld.
Lena smiles at her softly. “Welcome to the real world, Kara.”
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“Your sister found me because she was ready.”
Kara frowns. “Ready for what?”
“For the truth.” Lena replies simply. “To wake up and leave the lie behind.”
“The lie?” Lena’s words bring back echoes of Alex’s message. The Matrix still has you… You’ll find me, if you’re ready to wake up. “You mean… the Matrix?”
“Yes.”
Kara leans forward, her attention caught. “What is the Matrix?”
Lena sighs, her eyes clouding over. “I’m afraid no one can be told what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself. Right now, all I can tell you is that the Matrix is everywhere. It’s all around us. It’s in the air we breathe, in everything we touch…”
Lena ventures a hand between them to touch Kara’s, their hands connecting in the slightest. And even though she knows that she’s not really touching Kara’s hand, her mind feeds her the sensations of it — the softness of Kara’s skin, the gentle press of her flesh under Lena’s fingers.
Lena draws her hand away, and Kara follows it avidly with her eyes. “For you to know what the Matrix is, I have to go back to the beginning. Or at least, to where it begins for us.”
Or, the Supercorp Matrix AU
[So I found an old Matrix AU from a different fandom while I was rooting through my drive, and I thought it could be retooled into a Supercorp AU. Little did I know what I was inviting into my brain, but here we are suffering the consequences. (And now I have 2 different supercorp Matrix AUs. Great.) Spoilers ahead for the OG trilogy.]
In the movies, Neo is the One, but there are other Potentials. Each Potential displays extraordinary abilities beyond the standards of normal. Kara and Lena are both Potentials. Either one of them could be the One.
It begins in the Matrix, when Lena gets adopted by the Luthors as a little girl.
The Luthors are a picture-perfect family. Powerful, affluent, and respected. The father, the mother and the golden son. And Lena - smart, angelic and pretty, the perfect daughter - is the ideal addition to make their picturesque family complete.
Except when she's about 4 or so, it becomes apparent that Lena is not like other children.
It's immediately clear that her intellect far surpasses people four, five times her age. Lena is sharp and brilliant, able to grasp complex concepts most adults cannot. She seems to see the world around her in a different way.
The Luthors are no strangers to gifted children, their son Lex was deemed a prodigy at around the same age. At first, Lionel and Lillian take this as yet another proof of how exceptional Luthors are, and Lena is proudly displayed as their indigo child.
But Lena's talent develops as fast as she does.
Soon, she begins to exhibit strange, unexplained abilities. An expensive Waterford crystal goblet in Lionel's hand explodes when Lena has a tantrum. Once, Lillian walks into her playroom to find Lena having tea with her dolls, and when Lillian enters, all heads turn to her. Lena's and all four of her Madame Alexander dolls.
Her intellect begins to surpass what defines “normal” intelligence. She predicts and successfully foils an assassination attempt against Lionel. She prevents Lex from getting hit by a driver in a car chase five blocks away.
The last straw comes when Lena finds out that the cleaning lady's five year old son has cancer.
Lena convinces Alma to take her to see him. Five hours later, a tearful Alma brings the little girl back with something akin to wonder in her eyes. "Your little girl is an angel, Mr. Luthor. Bendecida por la Virgen. She cured my Carlos! She took away his sickness! Ella es un milagro de Dios!”
However, far from seeing it as a miracle, the Luthors circle the wagons. The next day, Lena finds out Alma has been dismissed, and a shift occurs in the Luthor household.
When Lena's abilities were within the parameters of "normal", they were good, something to be proud of. But now that her gifts have proven to be beyond that, they become alien, freakish. Something to be hidden. People would be asking too many questions, and Luthors do not permit those.
Suddenly, instead of being lauded for what she is able to do, Lena is now scrutinized and examined to find out what's "wrong" with her. It begins to strain the family that is obsessed with order and perfection.
They take Lena to various doctors and put her through all sorts of tests, but none of them seem able to find an explanation for Lena’s strange abilities.
Until they meet Rhea, an educator who runs an exclusive facility for “gifted” children.
An elegant and well-spoken woman, Rhea seems fascinated by Lena. Her teaching “methods” seem vague, but out of all the specialists Lena has seen so far, she is the only one who seems to understand and make a connection with her. At the very least, they seem to speak the same language. Rhea knows about this Matrix Lena has been talking about.
Rhea asks Lena if she wants to find out what the Matrix truly is. And when Lena agrees, Rhea takes the little girl to the Oracle to confirm her suspicions that she is a Potential.
Lena is taken to a tall building, riding all the way to the top floor with her little hand in Rhea’s. On the 64th floor, they enter a glass office in which an imperious looking blond woman sits, watching her with a piercing eye.
“Leave us.”
The woman orders sharply, slanting a glare at Rhea. She is at least 6 inches shorter than Rhea, even in heels, but her tone and her face brook no argument. Rhea retreats with a seething sneer, but she complies.
“Now, you,” the woman turns to Lena with a dark look and a raised brow. It fails to intimidate Lena, who has lived with Lillian Luthor’s pointed glares for the past three years of her life. “Do you know why you’re here?”
Lena merely blinks at her. “Because I know things.”
The woman scoffs. “So do I. Doesn’t make you special.” She gestures around her at her office with a spectacular view. “I know things too.”
Lena’s eyebrows rise as well. “Not everything.”
The woman’s glare intensifies, but Lena stares her down. After a moment, a corner of the woman’s mouth lifts, and she barks out a laugh. “You’re a smart one, aren’t you?”
Lena clasps her hands behind her back. “So I’ve been told.”
“Do you know who I am?”
Lena nods. “You’re the Oracle.”
The woman snorts delicately. “Did Rhea tell you that?”
Lena regards her solemnly. “She didn’t have to.”
The woman’s eyes narrow at her, but Lena says nothing more. She is scrutinized for another moment before the woman smirks. “Alright. Since you’re so smart, why don’t you tell me what you already know.”
Lena blinks at her, responding to the woman’s scrutinizing gaze in kind. “I know that you’re not human.”
Another laugh, this time louder. Piercing blue eyes gain a twinkle of mirth. “Very good. What else?”
“I know that you’re not real.”
The woman scoffs disdainfully. “Real is an abstract concept.”
“I know that I’m dreaming, and none of this is real.”
The mirth suddenly vanishes from the woman’s gaze, and her blue eyes stare at Lena intently. “What do you mean?”
Lena sweeps her little arms across the room. “This. All of this. Everything. It’s not real. It’s just a dream.”
The woman is leaning forward now. It looks to Lena as if she is holding her breath. “And what makes you think that?”
Lena chews thoughtfully on her lower lip. “Have you ever read Plato’s allegory of the cave?”
The woman’s eyebrows rise and an amused smile dances over her lips. “Of course.”
“It feels like that. Like the people chained to the walls of the cave, watching just shadows and reflections. Other people — even my parents, even Lex — they look around them and think that this is the real thing. But all we’re seeing are just shadows. Sometimes it makes me feel confused and blurry, like I’m dreaming, but I can’t wake up.”
The woman hums and her hands form a steeple under her chin as she continues to observe Lena.
"In the story, the prisoner who is freed into the sunlight was angry and in great pain after being in the dark for so long. Why would they go through that? Why not stay in the comfort of the darkness that they’ve known all their lives?”
Lena’s gaze doesn’t waver. “Because they would finally know the truth. They wouldn’t be living in a lie anymore. They would be free.”
A smile spreads across the woman’s face, and the nod she gives is almost approving. “Is that what you want?”
“Only if you tell me the truth.” Lena nods solemnly. “Will you tell me the truth, Oracle?”
“I’ll tell you everything you need to know.” The woman chuckles. “And one more thing. Call me Cat.”
Despite their animosity toward each other, both Cat and Rhea decide that Lena is more than ready for extraction.
The only problem is that Lena, at 6 years old, is one of the youngest children to be extracted so far. Because she’s so young, it’s decided that her family should be brought with her too. Lex, by then a teenager, is given a choice: to stay in the Matrix, or go down the rabbit hole, as it were.
Lex chooses to follow his family, and the Luthors are extracted by Rhea. They are brought on-board her ship, the Daxam. All four Luthors are taken to Zion, and told the truth about everything — the lie of the Matrix, the human harvest fields, and the fact that there is no going back.
That’s when it all goes to hell.
Lionel barely lasts three months.
Unable to accept the truth that his life of power and control was all a lie, and unwilling to believe that he now exists in a world where his name holds no weight, he somehow escapes Zion and finds his way to a human pod to try to inject himself back into the Matrix.
They search for him for weeks, and eventually they find him in the pod, impaled on the metal breathing hose stuffed into his mouth with the end sticking out the back of his head.
Lillian lasts longer, but this is no comfort.
Torn from her privileged life, her resentment begins to build and build, as she’s forced to accept her new reality.
Her perfect life was stolen from her. The high-paying job, the distinguished career, the unlimited influence, the beautiful house, the comfortable lifestyle — all gone. All apparently just a dream.
And now, Lillian has woken up to the dirt and drab and heat and toil of Zion’s underground, with nothing to show for her former life but the daughter she didn’t even ask for. The same daughter who is the very reason she’s trapped here now with no chance of going back.
She refuses to reconcile with her new reality, but she is no weakling like her husband. Instead, she lets the ugly, bitter ire fester inside her over the years, until it finally comes out.
One night, Lillian enters the rough, tiny cave that has become her unwilling home, creeps into the alcove carved into rock where her teenaged daughter sleeps and pours acid over her.
Lena’s screams wake others in the neighboring dwelling, and healers are immediately dispatched to tend to her wounds. Thankfully, Lena was turned away in her sleep, and the burns were limited to her back.
By the time her condition is pronounced stable, Lillian is gone.
Without her parents, Lena is taken in by Rhea to live with her, her husband Lar Gand and their infant son, Mon-El.
Rhea keeps Lena very close, almost jealously so. She prizes the young girl above all else in their household. Most of her time is devoted to teaching Lena, training her using the fight simulations and programs on the Daxam, instructing her on how to pilot the ship.
For Lena — who had grown up under Lillian’s growing resentment and bitterness, who had just survived a horrific attack on her by her own mother — Rhea is a godsend. Under Rhea’s maternal affection, Lena thrives. She pushes her own limits during her training, masters techniques with unparalleled speed and unerring accuracy, devours knowledge programs downloaded into her mind every time she’s plugged in. She blooms under Rhea’s freely-given praise, and works harder, starved as she was for acknowledgment and affection over the years.
As Rhea’s son, young Mon-El, grows up without displaying any unique abilities, he is often shunted to the side. Despite their age-difference, Lena makes a conscious effort to spend time with him, to give him the same nurturing Rhea is giving her.
She teaches Mon-El how to make repairs to the ship, explains how the thrusters work, how the pads keep the ship in balance. He’s most fascinated by the robotic armed exoskeletons that are kept at the dock for the city’s defense. He often asks Lena to take him to the bridge to watch them, and the two of them watch the exoskeletons being loaded, Lena leaning on the top rail, and Mon-El perched on the middle one, his skinny legs swinging in the air. As Lena smiles, the young boy boldly tells her that one day, he’ll pilot one of those.
It feels… nice. Almost like having a brother again. It feels like a second chance
After all, her own brother — well, that bridge was burned a long time ago, and Lena tries not to think about it.
But it’s hard to forget when she sees him all time, a nightmare come to life, whenever she’s plugged into the Matrix.
Lena will never forget the first time she saw her brother there.
Lex had abandoned them, had left his mother and sister in Zion years ago, as soon as he was of age. She’d tried to find him, had spent weeks, months, looking for him, to no avail.
Finally, Lena had been forced to accept that Lex had met their father’s fate. He could’ve been attacked by sentinels, gotten lost in the mechanical sewers, or worse, attempted the same thing Lionel had.
Either way, the result was the same, and the guilt and pain of it had been agony, but Lena had accepted it.
Until the day she met the Agent.
Most agents were already nigh indestructible, with their speed and brute strength, not to mention the internal communication they kept with each other through the program.
But this one… this one stayed on Lena’s tail with a dogged, malicious ferocity that she couldn’t shake off. It had been dangerously close several times already as he chased her throughout the dark, rain-soaked city streets. She couldn’t get a good lock on him, and it was all she could do to follow Jack’s instructions to the nearest extraction point.
Lena’s almost there, sliding into the booth, hand outstretched to grab the phone — when she sees it.
The Agent wearing her brother’s face, a feral smile stretching his lips as his fingertips brush the corner of her dark coat. The grin turns into a snarl as Lena lifts the phone to her ear, and he misses her by a millimeter.
It had been only a second, but… it was Lex.
Lena was sure of it. So sure that she had spent months hacking into the system with Brainy’s help, trying to find out what the hell was going on.
It takes six months of hacking into the mainframe to discover the truth. Lex had succeeded where their father had not. The son had surpassed the father.
Not only had Lex somehow managed to get himself reinserted into the Matrix, the anomaly of his presence in the code had also caused a glitch in the system itself.
It takes another encounter with Lex — in his new regalia of a generic black suit, bland tie and FBI-issued sunglasses — sneering at her as he points a gun at her head, to realize yet another knife-wound truth.
Her brother has become a virus in the Matrix.
________
Kara’s experience in the Matrix could not have been more different from Lena’s.
More than a decade before Lena was born, Kara Zorel was like any normal thirteen year old girl. She went to school, hung out with her friends, had a crush on the boy living next door. She got straight A’s, and volunteered at the local senior home.
Her quicksilver mind that could spot things others couldn’t was easily considered as part of her intelligence. She was a very smart girl, after all. Her obsession with puzzles and codes was easily filed away as a quirk or a phase she was going through until she found a new hobby.
Everything about her life seemed to be on track to become ordinary, until the day of the accident.
At least, they told her it was an accident. Kara doesn’t remember any of it. All she really remembers is waiting for a train at a subway station. She remembers her father mentioning a Trainmaster who would take them away, somewhere new. To a new home, her mother had said. [This is from the 3rd movie]
And then nothing.
Kara thinks she must have been dreaming, because she can remember being left alone in that subway station — the walls were blank and a sterile white, with nothing to indicate the presence of life except Kara herself sitting on the otherwise empty bench. She can remember the feeling of waiting, waiting endlessly for the nothing that would come — no trains, no other passengers, no one else at the station with her. She can remember running along the platform tirelessly, only to end up in the same place she’d started from. She remembers the feeling of being left behind and trapped and scared. Mostly scared.
And then the next thing she knows, she’s awake on a hospital bed with Eliza Danvers sleeping on the chair next to her.
The Danvers had found her on the train platform, curled up, unconscious, on the same bench she’d dreamed of. They’d thought she was a runaway, or a missing child, but the FBI agents who had come to Kara’s hospital room had told her that her parents were dead.
An accident, they’d said. A subway malfunction that had taken out a whole car. Under investigation, the man in sunglasses and a dark suit had reassured Jeremiah and Eliza in a monotonous voice.
With no one to claim her, no other family to speak of, Kara is taken in by the Danvers. They’re good people, kind and understanding when Kara wakes up in the middle of the night with nightmares of being trapped in a white sea of nothingness.
When Kara wakes up crying and sweating, Eliza is there to soothe her and rock her in her arms until she fell asleep again. When she tells Jeremiah that everything is too loud and bright, he sits her down and teaches her to calm her thoughts and meditate.
Alex, who had gone from being an only child to having an anxious, high-maintenance little intruder in her room, is less than happy about the situation. She keeps her distance, and gives Kara cold glares from across the bedroom or ignores her completely.
Until one night when Alex sneaks back into their room from the concert she’d snuck out to earlier, and finds Kara sitting on one corner of her bed with her knees curled up. With Alex gone for most of the night, Kara had been alone and had refused to fall asleep, terrified of having nightmares again.
With only a little bit of grumbling, Alex tosses all their pillows and blankets onto the floor, and drapes one of her sheets over both their beds to make their first blanket fort. The first of many.
Curled up on the floor next to Alex, Kara sleeps soundly through the night for the first time since waking up without her parents.
Still, despite slowly settling in with the Danvers, Kara can’t shake the feeling that something is off.
It feels as if everything around her is just a little bit off-kilter. As if the world had somehow changed in the time she’d been unconscious. Or maybe she had. Either way, it feels as if both Kara and the world around her know on some level that she’s not supposed to be here. Perhaps it’s because she was meant to die along with her parents. But by some unknown anomaly, here she is, half of her present, half of her straining to join her mother and father wherever they are.
It’s not a reflection on the Danvers. Kara couldn’t have asked for a better family to care for her. And she cares for them too. Over time, Kara gains a sister she would die for in a heartbeat, instead of a roommate who barely tolerated her presence when she first arrived. Her definition of ‘mother’ slowly expands and makes room for Eliza in her heart. She finds a man to respect and admire in Jeremiah.
Still, the feeling of being out of place persists throughout the years, always in the back of Kara’s mind.
Tragedy strikes when Jeremiah disappears.
It happens quickly, too quickly. One day her foster father is there, the next he’s gone. The only clue the police get is the last voicemail on Jeremiah’s phone.
The message starts with Jeremiah’s voice, reminding Alex that he’ll be picking her up from softball practice later, then it cuts off abruptly without warning.
Ten seconds later, another voice is heard through the other end, this time a smooth monotone. It sounds nothing at all like Jeremiah, and it sends a chill down Kara’s spine.
“The Luthor girl escaped again. She has eluded us one too many times for a human. She cannot avoid the inevitable…. Send the Brother. Next time, she dies.”
Nothing is found at the scene but Jeremiah’s phone. No evidence, no ransom note, no explanation for the strange message, nothing to trace, nothing to at all to suggest that Jeremiah Danvers was there. The blank-faced FBI agents offer no sympathy when they inform Eliza of the news in a smooth, apathetic monotone.
[[In case it’s not clear, Jeremiah got turned into an agent by the other agents who were chasing Lena during one of the times she was plugged into the Matrix]]
Their little family is shocked and reeling, but they cling to one another in their grief. Kara remembers something her mother always used to say. Stronger together, Kara. Life is hard, and we cannot face it alone. We must be each other’s strengths. We are always stronger together.
Still, life goes on. Keeps moving on, even after tragedy and loss. Sometimes, Kara feels as if the world is in constant motion, its inertia having no time to waste on a young girl who feels as if she has been left behind.
The sense of alienation increases, and Kara is diagnosed with depression. Which only serves to increase her family’s concern, and puts a near-permanent look of worry in Eliza’s eyes.
So Kara puts on her brightest smile and hugs her foster mother. She talks more, smiles wider, laughs louder, and makes more friends to go out with so she’s not at home alone in her room which no longer has Alex in it.
Alex goes to college, then med school, the chip on her shoulder large enough to be seen from space. She’s determined to find out what really happened to her father, and Kara knows how stubborn she is.
But she only really finds out how serious Alex is when her older sister declares that she’s joining the FBI, and no amount of talking from either Kara or Eliza can dissuade her.
And it’s not as if Kara has a leg to stand on. At least Alex has a purpose, a direction. Meanwhile, Kara has no idea what she wants to do with her life. She meanders around after college, a little bit lost and floundering. She’s intelligent, her professors said, but she lacks focus.
Eventually, she gets hired at Catco as an assistant to the big boss herself, Cat Grant.
All of 5’4” in heels, the woman herself strikes fear into the heart of every intern roaming the halls. It’s impossible not to snap to attention when her private elevator dings and she steps out. Each click of her heels is a reminder of the power she wields, and honestly, Kara is a little terrified of her.
But she straightens her spine and her glasses, tucks her hair behind her ear, and refuses to be cowed.
And it’s as if Miss Grant takes it as a challenge to break her, because her demands become more and more unrealistic, more and more impossible. But something inside Kara tells her not to back down, to stare her right back, and wait her out. Cat Grant is a puzzle, and Kara has always been good at puzzles.
The key comes in the form of Carter Grant.
Cat tasks Kara to pick her son up from school one afternoon, and Kara finds the young boy waiting for her right outside the school gates. He’s a very sweet boy, a little shy, but he eventually tells Kara about this comic he’s been reading about a young superhero named Supergirl.
As he begins to brighten up talking about his new favorite character, Carter doesn’t notice the car coming from the other side of the street. Neither does Kara at first. But something inside her tells her to turn around.
Maybe it was a sound, an instinct, and unconscious observation too quick for her mind to consciously process. Whatever it was, it had her turning just in time to see the car heading straight for Carter.
She barely has time to pull the boy back to the sidewalk, and the car almost clips him. Almost.
“Are you okay??” Kara hurriedly checks Carter for any injuries or signs that he’s shaken up. Other than the boy’s wide eyes, he seems to be fine.
“That- that was amazing! You were so fast, Kara! You were like Supergirl! How did you do that?”
As they walk back home, Cart gushes about how awesome Kara’s save was, how she was as fast and strong as Supergirl. Kara laughs it off, but the relief that the boy is okay lingers.
The second the front door closes behind Kara, Carter pulls out a phone and scrolls through the contact list until he finds ‘Mom’.
When Cat answers, he whispers excitedly into the phone. “She did it! She was even faster than Lena by 0.02 seconds!”
“Good. Did she say anything else?”
“She mentioned her sister. Are you going to tell the Manhunter? Is J’onn going to pull them out? Or maybe Lena can come? I like it when she comes to visit.”
A rustle of paper in the background, and Cat drawls in an almost bored voice. “Not yet. She’s not ready.”
[[In this AU, Carter is a computer program designed to assist the Oracle. Kinda like Seraph in the movies. He and Cat have a very unusual relationship. He was just supposed to be a simple program to help ward her, but he was designed to be charming in an innocent and disarming way to help distract from his real purpose. Cat developed a fondness for him, so when he tries to protect her when she’s in danger, she ends up shoving him behind her and protecting him.]]
On the anniversary of Jeremiah’s disappearance, another tragedy rocks the Danvers family.
Alex Danvers disappears.
Eliza is inconsolable, but Kara… Kara is numb, at first. Denial is always the first instinct of the human mind when a shock is delivered to its system. There’s talk of a search, trying to find out where she might have gone, her usual routine, any places Alex frequents — it all rolls over Kara’s head. They’re looking for a body, but that’s not how Alex is gonna be found.
Unlike Jeremiah’s disappearance, Alex’s is not without a trail. She is an FBI agent after all. There will always be a trail, and like in most FBI cases, it can be found in the absence of one.
In this case, it’s Alex’s computer. It’s missing.
The more Kara thinks about it, the more it galvanizes her. Kara knows Alex, knows her quirks and her habits. She didn’t have many friends outside of work, mostly people from med school she’s since lost touch with. No, anything that happened to Alex would be connected to her work, and Alex kept all her work files in that computer.
She throws herself into finding it. Find it, and she finds Alex.
For months, Kara follows every lead, every loose thread she can find, all in the hope of finding the computer. Every time she comes across a dead end, she doggedly retraces her steps until she can find another lead. The chalkboard in the kitchen that used to house her grocery list desk becomes a list of all possible locations. Her desk at Catco is a disaster of papers and post-it notes — a receipt from Cat’s dry cleaners here, the number for Annie Leibovitz’s assistant there, and Alex’s bank statements piled on top.
All the while, Cat watches her. Observes her tenacity, her ability to find patterns that no one else would’ve noticed, her keen attention that allows her to find details that other people would’ve ignored.
Finally, after nearly a year of looking, Kara finds Alex’s computer in a security deposit box under the alias Alice Liddell.
It takes her all night, but Kara manages to gain access to Alex’s documents. She finds file after file on Alex’s investigation into Jeremiah’s disappearance. Articles on similar disappearances all over the world. Some incidents are identical to Jeremiah’s, some with more of a trail. The victimology is all over the place, but in certain cases, there is a disturbing pattern.
A number of the disappearances occur in National City, and nearly all of them have one thing in common. They’ve all been patients or relatives of patients at the Luthor Family Hospital — a stroke patient and his fiancee, a woman in a car accident, a man with a gunshot wound, an old lady with Alzheimer's and her widow, even three children from the cancer ward and one of their mothers. Most of these people were deceased, but there must have been some reason Alex thought otherwise. And if she was right, then there is something very disturbing going on in the Luthor Family Hospital.
Kara keeps searching the files, and finds a certain devolution in Alex’s notes. Towards the end, she seemed more and more disorganized, her thoughts more and more disjointed. And Kara feels a terrible sense of guilt at not noticing what her sister was going through.
Throughout the files, she finds multiple references Alex made to something called the Matrix. She stumbles upon a mess of a pdf that she’d originally thought was gibberish, but upon closer inspection actually more closely resembles computer code. And in the middle of the unintelligible tangle of letters and symbols, she finds a question.
What is the Matrix?
Just as Kara is trying to make sense of the question, a new message alert appears in Alex’s inbox. Kara stares at the screen. It originated from Alex’s own email. Frowning, she clicks on the message, and her eyes widen as she reads.
I’m alive.
Kara springs forward so fast, she almost dislodges the laptop from her kitchen counter. She tries multiple times to reply to the message, but nothing happens. Kara growls, and almost as if the computer can sense her frustration, another message appears.
I’m alive and I’m out.
Kara’s brows furrow. What? What the hell?
The Matrix still has you, Kara.
Kara’s frown deepens and she looks around her, checks the computer. Is this some kind of prank?
I’m sorry I had to leave, but you can’t follow. Not until you’re ready.
Ready for what, Kara thinks.
Ready to give it all up. Ready to wake up. You told me once that you felt like everything since you woke up in the subway station has felt strange, like a dream. You were right, it is. And you’ll find me, if you’re ready to wake up.
Kara’s jaw drops in shock.
Follow the white rabbit.
The message flashes across the screen for a moment, then the monitor goes black. Kara snaps it shut and pushes it as far away from her as she can.
That — what was that? A-a trick? A hallucination brought on by the lack of sleep and her hyperfixation?
She could check it again, turn the laptop back on and click on the messages again — but suddenly Kara is gripped by fear, and denial feels more like a comfort.
She packs away the computer, stowing it under the desk where she can’t see it, and goes to bed. She doesn’t sleep until 3 AM.
But of course, Kara is no coward. She’s never been one to back down to her fears. In the morning, armed with a cup of Noonan’s coffee and a clearer mind, she opens the laptop again.
She doesn’t quite have the courage to check the messages yet, but she finds another article. This time, about the [head] of the Luthor Family Hospital, a woman named Lena Luthor.
It takes no time at all for her quick mind to make a connection, but it takes a while for the rest of her conscious brain to catch up.
Luthor. She’d heard that name before. In a voicemail, the only thing left of Jeremiah Danvers. “The Luthor girl got away again.”
Lena Luthor.
That can’t be a coincidence. Alex had been looking into their dad’s disappearance, and the Luthor name has already come up more than once, and now a female Luthor.
All the research she does on Lena Luthor comes up with next to nothing. Other than business articles and some papers in several scientific journals, there’s very little mention of the woman. So far, all Kara knows is that Lena Luthor is the CEO of one of the leading tech companies in the world, dedicated to providing accessible technology and communication devices to billions of people all over the globe — their new L-Phones are popping up everywhere. She’s also apparently a brilliant scientist and researcher, invested in scientific research to help prevent and cure diseases. She also owns and is directly involved in the running of the Luthor Family Hospital, a facility known for innovative and experimental medicine.
And for all of her work and accolades, there has never been a single photograph of this woman past the age of 6. Nothing. This woman’s image has never been recorded in any way, in any kind of media, in any event, in all the years that she has been running L-Corp. How is that even possible?
Now, Kara’s definitely suspicious.
Three days after the computer is found — plenty of time for thinking, but not too much time to do something stupid, she thinks — Cat makes her move.
She summons Kara to her office and delivers her ultimatum, in the form of an offer.
“Y- You think I have what it takes to be a reporter?”
“You’re an intelligent woman, Keira. But more than that, you can see things others can’t. You observe far more than people give you credit for. You could have a bright future here at Catco.”
Cat surveys her intently over her glasses. “It’s your choice. You can take the job, or you can keep wasting your life going down this rabbit hole.”
Cat gestures toward Kara’s messy desk, but again Kara’s quick mind gives her a nudge. That’s the third reference she’s heard in as many days. Rabbit hole. Alice. White rabbit.
Kara asks Cat for time to think about it, but really, she’s already made her decision. She uses her connect as Cat’s assistant to set up an appointment, introducing herself as Kara Danvers from Catco, writing an article about the Luthor Family Hospital.
The assistant confirms that Miss Luthor would be delighted to give Catco a glimpse into the facility to bring awareness of the work they do, and confirms the time.
When Kara arrives, she is directed to the children’s cancer center. When she sees the whimsical mural of a white rabbit hopping along a trail on the walls, she knows she’s at the right place.
Kara follows the mural until she reaches a room at the end of the hall. A soft feminine voice floats down the hallway and reaches Kara’s ears.
“To begin with, tell me, do you think that these men would have seen anything of themselves or of one another except the shadows cast from the fire on the wall of the cave that fronted them?
How could they, he said, if they were compelled to hold their heads unmoved through life?”
Kara walks closer, drawn to the sound. She stops just outside the door to what is clearly a child’s hospital room. A little girl in white pajamas and a colorful bonnet sits cross-legged in the middle of the bed, listening to the dark-haired woman sitting on the chair by her side. The woman’s back is turned to Kara, but she can see the book she’s reading from. Plato.
“By Zeus, I do not, said he.
Then in every way such prisoners would deem reality to be nothing else than the shadows of the artificial objects.”
“Quite inevitably.” The little girl on the bed quotes with a smile. Kara hears a soft, amused hum from the woman.
“Consider, then, what would be the manner of the release and healing from these bonds… When one was freed from his fetters and compelled to stand up suddenly and turn his head around… and lift up his eyes to the light, and in doing all this, felt pain…”
Kara sees the moment the reader realizes that she’s there. The woman’s head turns just the slightest, and Kara can see her sharp, elegant profile silhouetted in the light. She keeps reading, but at this point, they both know she’s aware of Kara’s presence. Kara continues to listen silently.
“What do you suppose would be his answer if someone told him that what he had seen before was all a cheat and an illusion… But that now, being nearer to reality and turned toward more real things, he saw more truly?”
Just then, the little girl’s eyes snap up to meet Kara’s, and big black eyes blink owlishly at her. “Miss Lena, we have a visitor.”
The woman finally turns, and Kara gets her first glimpse of Lena Luthor. Cut-glass green eyes are perceptive as they take Kara in, and a small smile plays on the corner of red lips.
“So we do, Zuri.”
She sets the book down on the bed beside the child and rises from her seat, a pale hand extended. "Kara Danvers, I presume?"
It takes Kara a second to reply, unable to take her eyes off the woman. There’s something arresting about her, something that could probably stop anyone in their tracks. Even the way she tips her head to survey Kara is fluid and mesmerizing.
Clearing her throat, Kara takes Lena Luthor’s proffered hand. “Yeah – uh, yes.”
The woman's smile grows. "I've been expecting you."
For a moment, the words make Kara's stomach flutter, then the 'duh' moment hits her. Of course she'd been expecting her, they had an appointment. Kara's face flushes red. "I've been looking forward to meeting you, Miss Luthor."
Green eyes gain a look of amusement and crinkle at the corners. Lena Luthor looks as if she has a secret, or like she’s in on a joke Kara doesn't know. "Not as much as I have, I'm sure."
Kara's brows furrow in confusion, but before she can ask the woman what she means, the Luthor bends down and kisses the top of the child's head, before heading out the door and gesturing for Kara to follow.
[[I just love the idea of Lena reading the Allegory of the Cave to the children like she did when she was a kid, as her way of preparing them, a way of telling them that yes, extraction will hurt, it won't be easy to accept the truth, but they will be free].
[Also in this AU, the extraction points used to be the pay phones like in the movie, except those got phased out once the machines figured out that’s what the resistance was using. So Lena developed the L-phones, and made it so one would always be easily accessible. That’s the work she does at L-Corp]]
After their tour of the hospital concludes, Lena watches Kara walk out through the double doors, throwing a friendly wave behind her. As soon as she's out of sight, she pulls out an L-phone.
"Well, she’s persistent, I'll give you that."
"Told you. Who do you think she got it from?”
“I see stubbornness runs in the family.” Lena hums in amusement.
A chuckle from the other end of the line. “You have no idea.”
"How close is she?"
Alex’s voice turns business-like. "Well, she’s made the connection to you, and Kelly’s seeing some sizeable fluctuations in the code, so I'd say she’s getting there. J’onn thinks she might be ready soon. He says she’s responding quickly for someone who hasn’t had as long to adjust. Sooner if you prepare her, probably.”
“That won’t be a problem.”
“Rhea,” Lena can hear the seething disdain Alex’s voice, and thinks her mentor is probably standing over Alex’s shoulder as they speak. “Would like me to remind you that the sooner we pull out my sister —“ Lena can almost see her glare at Rhea. “The sooner you can get back to the Daxam, and this can ‘all be over with’.”
Lena shakes her head. “I’m not pulling her out before she’s ready. The consequences could be disastrous.”
“Yeah? Try telling that to your Captain.”
They’re interrupted by an excited young voice. “Hi, Lena!”
“Mon-El?”
Alex snorts over the line. “Yeah, can you believe her? She brought the kid over just to get you to ‘speed things up’.”
“When are you coming back, Lena? I miss you! I snuck into the dock last week, but M’gann caught me. She said she’d teach me how to make shells if I promised not to go past the bridge again. And Imra asked if she could come with us the next time we go to the bridge to see the loaders, I told her yeah. That’s okay, right?”
Despite the seriousness of their situation, Lena can’t help but smile a bit at the young boy’s enthusiasm. “Of course she can. I’ll be back soon, Mon-El. Stay out of trouble, and do what your ranking officer says.”
“Okay, kid, you heard the lady. Go bother Brainy and Kelly at operations. It's about time you learn to read code anyway."
Lena can hear the boy grumbling in the background, but he obeys. As soon as he's out of earshot, Lena goes back to business.
“Start a trace for Kara's pod location, and standby. Be ready to plug in when I tell you to.”
"Copy. J’onn’s gonna try to get us as close as he can, but it's the fields. We can never be too careful. And Lena…? Try to make it easy for her."
Alex’s voice softens at her request, her concern for her sister evident in every word, and Lena understands. Just as Alex understands that there is nothing easy about the truth Kara will have to see.
"I'll do what I can."
This is not the last time Kara pays her a visit.
Under the guise of her article, Kara returns to Lena again. And again.
The first time she comes over under the guise of an interview, she stays until lunch. And then takes Lena to lunch, partly to make up for ruining her schedule, and partly because the CEO confesses that she often forgets to eat throughout the day.
They eat at Kara’s favorite lunch spot, Noonan’s, where Kara is aghast to learn that Lena has never tried any of their desserts despite the café being less than a block away from L-Corp. They end up trying nearly every dessert on the menu. Or at least Lena samples a little bit of everything, and Kara finishes it all off.
They part, with some reluctance on Kara’s end, three hours past Kara’s allotted time, but Lena assures her that it was worth clearing her schedule, considering how much she enjoyed Kara’s company.
It’s only after she’s no longer in Lena’s presence that Kara realizes she’d all but forgotten about her purpose for coming, which was to interrogate her about the suspicious disappearances at the Luthor Family Hospital, and about Lena’s possible involvement in Alex’s own disappearance.
She returns, this time with the flimsy excuse of bringing Lena lunch now that she knows the CEO won’t remember it herself. Lena suggests they go out to the nearby city park to enjoy her break there.
Lena leads her to a bench on a hill and they sit there quietly, enjoying their view of the park. Lena gives Kara a shy smile. “I like to come out here sometimes. When everything becomes… too much. Sometimes, everything around me just feels so wrong and… fake. Especially with what I do. It feels like none of it, none of this is real.”
Kara turns to look at her fully, a crinkle in her forehead, and Lena wonders if she's pushing it. “What do you mean?”
“Have you ever had that feeling where… you’re not sure if you’re dreaming or awake? And you’re not quite sure if anything around you is real or not?”
Lena chances a look at the other woman. Kara is looking back at her, eyes wide and intent. It takes a moment, one long moment where Kara is just staring at her, as if trying to puzzle her out. Then she nods.
“Yeah. All time.”
“That’s how I used to feel.” Lena holds her gaze, steady green meeting wondering blue. Kara is so close right now, so close that Lena could tell her. How easy it would be if Lena could convey the truth just by looking into Kara’s eyes. But she’s not ready yet. Lena drops her gaze with a soft laugh.
“I guess I was just thinking, if none of this is real, then none of my problems there would be real, either.” She gestures back at L-Corp with a wry smile.
Kara takes the bit, and her smile softens, blue gaze losing some of its intensity.
Kara fails her mission again that time. And the next. And the next. It feels as if she forgets her problems when she’s with Lena. For the first time in a long time, it doesn’t feel like she’s out of place. The world doesn’t feel so wrong when she’s with Lena, or at least, it doesn’t bother Kara as much. She feels like… herself.
As for Lena, she knows they’re running out of time, and that the agents will catch wind of them soon. Especially since Kara is on the precipice of the truth.
But for the first time, Lena finds herself delaying the inevitable. It’s unlike her — the Potential who has spent her whole life freeing as many minds from the Matrix as she can; the second-highest ranking officer and chief engineer of the Daxam, who seizes every situation with a level head and a calm command.
“What are you doing, Lena?”
Rhea’s voice is an imperious snap, even over the line. “You have never spent this long in the Matrix since I pulled you out. You’re putting yourself in danger for a simple extraction. It shouldn’t be taking this long.”
“No extraction is ever simple. I told you, she’s not ready.”
“I know you and that Oracle—” the word is practically a hiss in her mentor’s mouth. “—think that this woman is a Potential, but if she really were that special, she would’ve been ready a long time ago. You were ready long before I found you.”
“This is different—“
“Why? Because you’re sweet on her?”
Lena’s eyes narrow. “You know that’s not why.”
As soon as Lena’s tone gains an authoritative edge, Rhea softens. “I know, my dear. But you know how I worry about you being plugged in for so long with… Lex out there. Besides, you have been neglecting your duties on the ship. Your crew needs you, Mon-El needs you. Come back home, Lena.”
Lena relents. “I will. Soon.”
But ending her time with Kara is easier said than done.
It may be selfish, but around Kara, Lena feels lighter. Her responsibilities don’t weigh as much, and the bleakness of war vanishes in the company of someone so earnest and warm and hopeful. Kara is… resilient. In spite of all that she’s been through, she remains strong, determined, and most incredible of all, kind.
Lena watches Kara with the children — the youngest Potentials, who see the wrongness of the world around them, but aren’t ready yet to be pulled out — and watches her pull gap-toothed smiles and belly laughs out of even the most solemn ones.
She extends this kindness, even to Lena — over daily reminders to eat and take care of herself, to lunch dates she tags Lena along to because she thinks Lena will forget to eat otherwise.
Once, after a successful extraction of one of Lena’s children, a somber Kara brings a small bouquet of plumerias to the little girl’s empty room. She finds Lena sitting next to the child’s empty bed.
“I’m so sorry.” Kara plucks a single plumeria from the bouquet, before setting the flowers on the girl’s pillow.
Lena shakes her head, a serene smile on her face. “Don’t be. She’s free. She’s in a better place now.”
Kara, not understanding her words, gives her a sad smile. She takes Lena’s hand and presses the single plumeria into her fingers. “I’m sure she is.”
Every day, Lena fails to tell Kara the truth, wanting to prolong their time together. And most of all, wanting to spare Kara for just a little longer. Lena can’t bear the thought of being another person who adds to everything Kara’s gone through, of being the reason why that smile dims a little more, or worse, never appears again at all.
Her hesitation nearly costs them everything.
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