#i stole this from some guy on discord

[chaosinthecloset]

Guys can we call him goatisimo

[sammydem0n64]

What god damn torture nexus was FPP going to be going through in the initial plans for The Hex man

[haystarlight]

What if mlp characters had Tumblr

🌟 smartypants Follow

I have a princess conference in the morning but that won't stop me from staying up till 3 am on AO3. Mama needs her bedtime stories

🐉 ogres&oubliettesenthusiast Follow

OP go to sleep or I will eat your crown

2,008 notes

🎈 smilesmilesmile Follow

All of you are like "would you fuck your clone?" hypothetically but, in practice, clones are too dumb to give consent and that's the real reason why I didn't sleep with any of my clones when I had the chance

🎈 totally-not-a-clone Follow

OP you still have a chance

10,000 notes

✨ great&powerful Follow

It's always "take off the evil amulet! it's corrupting your mind!" and never "oh! you look so pretty in your new amulet!"

✨ great&powerful Follow

Celestia forbid ladies do anything

102 notes

😏 sexiestvillaintournament Follow

🦋 Id-like-to-be-a-tree Follow

Um, would you guys please stop voting for my boyfriend?

🌪️ whatfunisthereinmakingsense Follow

I take it as a compliment

🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow

I am offended

500,467 notes

🍎 cmc-omc Follow

Y'all know how some families got a gay cousin and all 'em other cousins are straight? Well mah family's the opposite. Ah don't even think we got a straight cousin!

🍎 cmc-omc Follow

Mah sister says we have to assimilate other ponies into our family so the family name don't die out. She would do numbers here

5,667 notes

🌈 20%cooler Follow

GUYS I'M SO SORRY FOR THE DELAYS

I've just been on the hospital (again) cause I got zapped by lightning (again)

But I promise I'll update my Daring Do/Reader fic as soon as I can! Thanks for the patience, love you guys!

🌟 smartypants Follow

It's okay, take your time! I'll just reread the old chapters in the meantime

🐉 ogre&oubliettesenthusiast Follow

NO!!! YOU WILL GO TO SLEEP!!!

120 notes

💎 chicunique&maginifique Follow

"how are you so good at fashion" well you'd be an expert in fashion too if you'd spent 20 years in the closet

🔔 professional-theatre-filly Follow

My sister in Celestia that closet was made of glass

20,354 notes

🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow

Nothing like coming back from exhile just to find your bedroom was replaced by a whole ass forest

Some people have no respect for others belongings

☀️ cake.by.the.ocean Follow

I don't control the growing of the magical forest, bitch

🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow

Rude

☀️ cake.by.the.ocean Follow

Don't think I forgot about that time in 500 B.E. that you stole my ice cream

200 notes

🛴 the-agender-acrobat Follow

You can't hurt me I have mommy AND daddy issues I'm unstoppable

🌈 20%cooler Follow

OP do you need me to adopt you

🛴 the-agender-acrobat Follow

I would love that actually

1,554 notes

💎 chicunique&magnifique Follow

*levitates my cat out of the way so I can use the sewing machine, which I need for my job*

my cat: YOU LIFT OPALESCENCE?!?!???! YOU LIFT HER WITH YOUR WICKED SORCERY?!??!!!! YOU ASSERT CONTROL OVER HER WITH YOUR MAGIC?!?!??! OHHHHH!!! MOTHER IS EVIL!!!!!

🔔 professional-theatre-filly Follow

I agree with the cat

1,827,654 notes

🥕 Carrot-TOPING Follow

Girlfriend is out of town all week so I'm gonna dye my mane and tail green

💎 chicunique&magnifique Follow

WHY WOULD YOU DO SUCH A THING

🥕 Carrot-TOPING Follow

She's all my self control

364, 245 notes

🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow

Back in my day we tagged our fanfiction properly. There's a difference between / and & you rufians

☀️ cake.by.the.ocean Follow

Shut up old lady

🌘 I-have-loved-you-for-a-thousand-years Follow

YOU'RE OLDER THAN ME

30,150 notes

🩵 girlboss Follow

Sure, sex is great but does *your* husband help you check all your shipping fanfiction for grammar errors? Didn't think so

💎 chicunique&magnifique Follow

She's everything, he's just Ken

🛡️ malewife Follow

Happy to be of service 🫡

2,035 notes

[ioniansunsets]

i discovered your blog today and i have a scenario in mind that i have to share with you!

could you write a Heartsteel!Kayn request with K/DA!reader? — headcanons, fic or even the two of them talking on discord; it could be anything! — if you want to ignore it, i will understand, dear.

✖ Heartsteel!Kayn with K/DA!Reader ✖

✖ Word Count: 1.1k

✖ Tags: Established R/S

✖ A/N: I'm also going with headcanon of the idol thing where they try not to get caught in public together to avoid gossip but people somehow ship you guys and speculate anyway teehee ITS CUTE!!!!! I'm also pretending you guys got together after he joined Heartsteel so its after he got removed from his old band.also PARANOIA DROP IN 10 HOURS LETS GO TEAM!!!!!!!! I LOVE HEARTSTEEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

----

xxxx On Tour xxxx

-  It sucked so bad! It was touring season and the both of you guys were busy. All your time together were quick video calls over Discord and sporadic updates via message. It wasn't a secret to your bandmates at least so your respective bands did try their best to give you space. Quiet moments in dressing rooms to call each other were now your small moments of peace between practice sets and live shows.

- Somehow still finding ways to love each other apart. Kayn getting Akali to buy you some chocolates from him. You pleading Alune to help you send Kayn some flowers after his show. (She's a sucker for romance so she lovingly helps you.) Or the way he would spend money getting someone to deliver dinner to you after a long show.

- If only one of you guys are touring, the other totally pays and watches all the livestreams and tries to pop by to shows! You're performing 3h from him? He's begging your manager to let him drop by. Waiting for you backstage to congratulate you on your hard work.

- If you're the one waiting for Kayn backstage he always visibly lights up. He tries to look cool and badass on stage but when its after a good show, seeing you wave at him in the halls, his heart soars! He runs over, pulling you in for a tight hug. " Did you hear me! I was good today wasn't I!" He'd smile proud, giving you a kiss as he fishes for compliments. There is no approval he craves more than your own.

- The other boys are surprisingly nice about it, no one really makes fun of Kayn for being so excited to see you (other than Ezreal). They treat you as one of the band, giving you VIP passes to pop by their shows. And you do the same for them! When possible you slip their manager some VIP tickets to your show for them to sneak in. A mutual understanding from both groups to protect you and Kayn from media.

- Pre-debut Heartsteel, Kayn has also went to almost all your shows, front row every time and surprisingly he always tries to match you hair color for the tour. You have bright blue for tour? So does he. Its blonde now? He's the same. Kayn just thinks its kinda cute to safely match with you in someway shape or form, it is just a small thing that paparazzi wouldn't pick up on so easily since so many other fans do it too.

xxxx Off Stage xxxx

- A supportive power couple, you two help each other out with band activities off stage. You aid him when he practices singing. Kayn giving you tips on how to get keep a good rhythm in your verses, and is also a personal cheerleader for dance practices. You'd help him get connections to other companies that K/DA has collabed with, trying to help Heartsteel succeed! Kayn helps out in his own ways too, sometimes playing tunes in his room for you to sing to. It is all really sweet.

- When he drops by your studio its adorable, it was before Heartsteel's debut and shortly after the peak of KD/A's release. Kayn trying to hide from paparazzi for your sake as he sneaks in through the back. Always in a different cap and sunglasses that he stole from Ezreal, he would wait in the practice room, sitting in a corner and cheering whenever you successfully get a dance move down. The other members don't seem to mind him much, he's now a common presence in the studio. The other girls seem fond of him, happy that you have someone so supportive by your side.

- You try to do the same between your busy training schedule too. Dropping by Kayn's place during band practice evenings, Yone always being the one to let you in since Kayn always sleeps in late. You'd bring snacks and a discerning ear. Your feedback being super useful as you're one of the few people Kayn actually listens to. What Aphelios or Sett say would take multiple attempts and a lot of effort to get through to Kayn, as such, the rest of the gang keep trying to get you to push him to not try to squeeze a "totally sick line" into the rap bridge.

- He doesn't show it off but Kayn has all your merch, you offer to give it to him but he refuses, something about manly pride and supporting his partner, he will spend his own money and time fighting with other fans to buy your merch. A lightstick by his bed, your album on his shelf. A limited edition photocard safely stacked in a top loader on his table (he doesn't have a wallet or else he would totally bring it around.)

- You do the same for him, as one of Heartsteel's first fans you own some of their original merch, simple tees with just their logo, a average blank CD with " Paranoia KAYN MIX" scrawled on in messy marker, they are all your treasured possessions. Kayn even let you keep some of his guitar picks, you have one with a hole punched in as a necklace that you wear when apart from him. Your one secret? You have CDs from when he was in his old band, only the album that he was included in of course, but you don't bring up how you were secretly a fan from his early career. - Sometimes you guys try to go out on dates, risky but fun! 3am walks at the beach, alone together as he plays the acoustic guitar for you by the waves as you sing. Expensive private room dinners at secluded restaurants, walking in, both of you with your hair temporarily dyed black with hair spray dye to try and avoid attention. Small things. Fun things. - It was a little embarrassing when rumors first circulated. Fans somehow finding it cute that Heartsteel can be seen at your shows or how sometimes K/DA gets spotted backstage at Heartsteel concerts. They started to ship members together and when a photo of Kayn looking at you with a soft loving smile was snapped, the internet went wild! *Isn't it cute how they can get Kayn to smile that way!* *Ah! It should be me I want to be them so bad!!!!* Kayn would never admit it to you but he likes all the TikTok video edits of the two of you together, he thinks its really cute unironically.

[quitealotofsodapop]

Who is The Mayor? Theory

Me and some guys on discord talked about a joke theory that I must share:

The Mayor is Hou Yi aka Chang'e's missing husband.

A former Celestial hunter turned mortal, forever separated from his true love due to mistakes.

Specifically, he's Hou Yi driven to desperate means after being separated from his wife and barred from the Celestial Realm.

We know that the Mayor has been alive since before the Pilgrimage and perhaps maybe even beyond. He also didn't drop dead the second LBD took away his powers, meaning that some other force was keeping him alive.

So imagine Hou Yi: left immortal and trapped on an Earth he cannot leave. He attempts to do some good with his limitless time. Becoming a loyal soldier and later Chief of War to a mortal Emperor - only to find himself disheartened by the imperial court's similarities to the one he was cast from. Then he meets an Ivory Lady that reminds him so much of his wife...

Comparison; painting of the Ivory Lady vs Chang'e as seen in a memory Tang jumps to.

Hou Yi!Mayor: "I miss my wife..." Ivory Lady/Lady Bone Demon: "Best I can do is destruction of this current world to make way for a clean slate" Hou Yi!Mayor: "...ok, that might make me feel better."

When the Mayor is cast aside by LBD during her fight with Sun Wukong, he doesn't seem betrayed by her disloyalty, not even disappointed. The greatest emotion he gives to the Monkie Kid gang is hysterical laughter combined with annoyance at being captured. Not to mention that the gang just sorta... leaves the Mayor tied up at the temple and he never appears again. What happened to him after that?

With the Lady Bone Demon's constant talk of others being pawns in her game, it would be equally amusing for her to be barely a rook on the board.

If the Mayor turns out to be the same person in S4 who stole the Scroll of Memory - Hou Yi would be somebody with person beef with the Jade Emperor.

According to some versions of "Hou Yi and the 10 Suns/Sons", the Jade Emperor/King Yao gives Hou Yi the (unclear) order to "take care" of the 10 rowdy sun gods. Hou Yi (an archer/hunter) naturally assumes that his order is to shoot them down. It's only after 9 are killed that he's stopped. After this, Hou Yi and his wife Chang'e are banished to earth. Later they obtain the Elixir/Pills of Immortality from the Queen Mother after Hou Yi slays many a celestial beast threatening the mortal realm. Chang'e then (whether accidentally or to prevent Hou Yi's student/Hou Yi himself from taking it) consumes the dosage meant for Hou Yi and is forever cast into the sky.

Imagine being Hou Yi in this situation. Betrayed not only by the Celestial Realm, but also by one of your closest companions. Forever alone because he were just following orders. You'd want to take a shot at the person most at fault for your pain. And like Hou Yi, the Mayor ends up with nothing for his loyalty.

It also continues the theme in LMK of people being separated/sealed away. Perhaps even a parellel to Princess Iron Fan and Demon Bull King. A married couple torn apart and separated for countless years.

Also I think it would be funny if perfect Cinnamon Roll Chang'e's true love turned out to be a man with the personality of a cat about to knock a glass off a counter.

[efadefoks]

I decided to put everyone into one post and to talk about some assosications I have with the characters and their cards

The Fool (Folly, mania, extravagance, intoxication, delirium, frenzy, bewrayment. [If the card is] Reversed: Negligence, absence, distribution, carelessness, apathy, nullity, vanity.) Of course it is Han Juwon in the begining if the story. "In many esoteric systems of tarot card interpretation, the Fool is interpreted as the protagonist of a story, and the Major Arcana are the path the Fool takes through the great mysteries of life." He is a Fool afterall: careless in his investigation, doesn't think about the people around him. He thinks he is the smartest guy in the room and the bestest boy in the area.

The Lovers. Here I decided to interpret it in the most literal way. But the card itself provides quite a nice explanation too. "6. THE LOVERS.—Attraction, love, beauty, trials overcome. Reversed: Failure, foolish designs. Another account speaks of marriage frustrated and contrarieties of all kinds." I really love the ending. The whole reunion thing is straight out of the romance story. That's why I chose this image to represent this card. The moment of piece at last.

The Hermit. When I first thought about this collage idea I was absolutly sure who should represent this card. "9. THE HERMIT. Prudence, circumspection; also and especially treason, dissimulation, roguery, corruption. Reversed: Concealment, disguise, policy fear, unreasoned caution."

The High Priestess. Oh Jihwa my beloved. There were several posts about her recently. She is a wonderful character. "Secrets, mystery, the future as yet unrevealed; the woman who interests the Querent, if male; the Querent herself, if female; silence, tenacity; mystery, wisdom, science. Reversed: Passion, moral or physical ardor, conceit, surface knowledge." Tell me this is not about her, I'll wait.

The Sun. The Moon. The Star. I thought it would be really symbolic to choose three young (and dead) characters to represent this cards. (of course, LDS is alive and old now but I think we can considr his younger self to be buried somewhere really deep in his mind. He wasn't the same person he'd been before his sister disappearance). Another thoought that I had in mind while making these three pieces was that scene from the first episode. The dialogue with Mother and her friend. "You are so lucky to have your daughter. Such a pity the God decided to balance it with your son." How almost everyone thought that Lee Yuyeon was a blessing and her brother - just a delinquent.

19.THE SUN.—Material happiness, fortunate marriage, contentment. Reversed: The same in a lesser sense.

18.THE MOON--Hidden enemies, danger, calumny, darkness, terror, deception, occult forces, error. Reversed: Instability, inconstancy, silence, lesser degrees of deception and error.

17.THE STAR.--Hope and bright prospects, Reversed: Loss, theft, privation, abandonment; another reading says: arrogance, haughtiness, impotence.

Kang Minjeong is a little star flickered out too soon.

The Magician. "Tarot experts have defined the Magician in association with the Fool". "While the upright Magician represents potential and tapping into one's talents, the reversed Magician's potential and talents are unfocused and unmanifested."

The Strength. One of my favourite cards and my favourite brave girl. I need to come clean I am not a fan of a lor of women portrayals in asian culture. But Yoo Jaeyi just stole my heart. She is kind, she is angry, she is loving, she is grieving. She is real. She is her own person. I love this image of her. "8. FORTITUDE.—Power, energy, action, courage, magnanimity; also complete success and honours. Reversed: Despotism, abuse of power, weakness, discord, sometimes even disgrace."

The Devil. Do I even need to explain myself? Well probably yes. Another candidate for this card was you guessed it - Han Kihwan. But after some thinking I finally decided on this one. "15. THE DEVIL.—Ravage, violence, vehemence, extraordinary efforts, force, fatality; that which is predestined but is not for this reason evil. Reversed: Evil fatality, weakness, pettiness, blindness." While Juwon's father is the evil person and the real villain of the story I do consider Kang Jinmuk the Devil.

[aussieaspecforces]

An announcement from Jeffy.

*opens the closet door I didn't realise existed* wait... what's this? Oh.

Oh...

*clears throat* righto. G'day mates, just wanted to let you know that recent events have led me to realise that I, Jeffy, am actually not on the Aspectrum. I am allo. I am boring. (Straight *and* cis? Really? Ugh. :P)

However! I hear you need a spy. Someone to watch Denmark's border control. Someone who can help the invasion from the inside.

With permission obtained in the discord, I present myself to you as an honourary member of Aussie Aspec Forces: your token allo and ally.

Now here's some garlic bread I stole from my crush for you guys: 🍞🥖🍞🥖

[lurafita]

Evilist of all evil, Magnus the Evil

(Super crack)

Magnus was evil. The big bad. The evilist. The biggest, baddest most evilist around. Totally. Super evil, diabolical genius with magic who was gonna rule the world!!!

... right after he gets that little girl's kitten out of that tree.

Or, how a possibly slightly crazy-ish Magnus fails at being evil, and instead finds a familiy of choice and the love of his life, in these people he keeps accidentally helping out.

(Originally posted in a Malec Discord server, where one other member added this little jewel):

Magnus is like "But I needs to do the evil today?!?🥺"

Alec: "Umm…I saw you get up to help an old lady with the groceries not 10 minutes ago AFTER you were done feeding kittens on the street…?"

Magnus: "🥺 But…evillll"

Alec: What if you were evil to the bad guys?

Magnus: They're not bad they're just misunderstood 😔

Alec : 😒

(Which made me add this as well):

(Magnus saying the bad guys are misunderstood got my brain going like): Magnus: "Like those guys that kidnapped me earlier." Alec: "You were kidnapped?!" Magnus: "Yes, see, they lured me into this white panel van with promises of 'a good time'." Alec: "Hasn't anyone had the 'stranger danger' talk with you?!" Magnus: "Of course. I'm a danger to the stranger, because I'm evil. Now, back to the gentlemen in the van. As soon as I was close enough, three of them grabbed me and one tried to chloroform me. Which of course didn't work, because I'm much more evil and therefor stronger than them. So after I beat them, we had a long talk. Turns out they got me confused with some rich heir to some family fortune, who they wanted to ransom back to his parents for lots of money. Money which they then wanted to use to pay off the hospital bills for the kid of a dead friend of theirs. Turns out the widow is badly in debt because of that and might lose the house, and then she and the kid will be homeless. But you know how much can go wrong with kidnappings, especially of people who are very rich and well connected. And these guys clearly weren't cut out for that. So I helped them rob a bank instead." Alec: "…"

(And another)

Alec gets home one day to the sight of Magnus rocking a toddler on his lap. The toddler is giggling happily, inbetween sucking a big lolly pop. Magnus has a similar lolly pop between his lips. Alec is… concerned. Alec: "Magnus? Why is there a child?" Magnus: "Well, it all started with me stealing the lolly." Alec: "You stole candy from a kid?" Magnus: "It's the evilist thing one can do, so I had to. It's the law. Anyway, I swapped out the kids lolly with a new one, because I may be evil, but I'm not a monster. And then I realized that the kid's lolly had been poisoned." Alec: "Oh my god are you okay? Should I call Cat?" Magnus: "Don't worry, Darling. I'm much too evil for this weak kind of poison to affect me. But the kid would have bit the dust, no question. A little investigating then led me to the kid's uncle, who is the legal guardian of the little one, and tried to get rid of him to get his hands on the money the dead parents left the kid in their will. So then I sent the uncle to my father and stole the kid."

[thewebcomicsreview]

Hate to tell you this, but the HSBC update just got updated.

I get that they wanted to keep the Hell Arc confined to page 666, and it'll make the archival experience pretty cool, but hard refreshing the site didn't let me see the update to the page due to cache bullshit, I had to use a different browser. So let's liveblog now before it breaks again:

Looks like we're back to Tavros. I guess it makes sense that the first path to update would the one where they could reuse the talksprites.

So, as directly stated by Davepeta, Vriska is trapped in a time loop, where Tavros doesn't remember anything that happened the previous day, just like in the movie Groundhog Day. That Davepeta called out the movie explicitly in-universe as the reference makes me wonder if events will follow the rough plot of that movie. It's clearly what Davepeta wants to happen, but...Vriska....

Anyway, Vriska offers to let Tavros decide what to do today, for the first time. It took two whole years for her to try that, but she is the Thief of Light and not letting anyone else decide what to do is literally her cosmic role and stuff, so I guess that tracks. And what Tavros wants to do is....play a game.

Last update I said that Vriska saying she's done some things wrong while shrugging and laughing is the ultimate distillation of Vriska, but her having won everything and being miserable about it is also the ultimate distillation of Vriska. She's a woman of contrasts, that Vriskers.

The use of the phrase "session" here outs this line as having Deeper Meanings. Having SBURB sessions over and over so we can play forever is literally Dirk's plan, and most of the fandom is assuming a Candy session is coming.

So, even though they're talking about playing FLARP (the troll DnD game, which is apparently PvP), this is also an argument over whether or not Homestuck should continue. You can't really "win" if the game keeps going, but that doesn't mean you're stuck doing the same thing over and over.

I know Vriska is Problematique, but I'm still taken aback by her 2000s kid usage of "gay" as a general-purpose insult, and not just because trolls don't have a concept of "straight" or "gay". Apparently she doesn't even know what it means and learned the word from Da-

Oh, it was just to set up this line for people to screenshot. Alright. Fine.

brb, gotta go post this in the hard to use reaction images channel on the discord and have someone complain it's easy to use.

Tavros accuses Vriska of projecting her own fears onto him, and then gets into a tangent about being a "soft" female fairy and Vriska takes him up on playing this new "game for girls" and he panics and changes the subject. There's a...lot....going on there.

Vriska starts to have an actual breakthrough, when suddenly Aradiabot appears. Wait, is this where Aradia and Ult!Dave went?

We fade to black and I thought that was it, but apparently not. This being a visual novel makes it feel like a much bigger update than it is, and also kind of makes you read each line a bit more carefully. It's a good way of having multiple meaty (or, um, candy-y) updates in a short stretch of time, and that's kind of an important part of the "feel" of Homestuck that no one can really replicate.

Oh, I do not care for this talksprite.

The downside of this format is that it's harder to liveblog, I think, but basically Aradia is complaining about the Vriska Cycle of "Do bad thing, self-flagellate to be redeemed, repeat".

Vriska justifies it because she has to take action and set people straight and stuff, and if this conversation/game isn't leading to the return of "(Vriska)", the OG timeline Vriska who died and got a ton of character growth before post-retcon Vriska stole her girlfriend, then what is it building towards?

A lot of these lines make good single-panel memes. Yes, Vriska, you are the problem in nearly every situation, even (especially) when you're also the solution.

Aradia sa- oh for fuck's sake this is unreadable, guys. Anyway she says that getting into a routine leads to stagnation and slow death, which, mood, but also is about Homestuck itself as much as it is about Vriska.

Jesus Christ, how long is this update? This page is a full on Pesterquest game when the other five routes are finished.

Oh, okay. That's it. Vriska levels and we get a bunch of fire-themed pun ranks for her, of which Skinner's Bane is the best

[pokenimagines]

SFW | Leon | Fic

So, taking a bat to the canon timeline here for a second, how would Leon react to finding out that his crush/s/o was the trainer responsible for all times the world had to be saved bc some rich guy in a suit (or rich lady, looking at Lusamine) decided to terrorize the world with the power of a pokemon who has only been spoken of in legends and folktales? And at this point, they're just tired, they want to take a nap and have a good time exploring a region without all the drama.

I don't think I translated it being his crush/significant other very well. But here we go. You just being like "So this is my life." and Leon just being "Well...damn...aight."

Rules | Discord Server (16+)

SFW Leon: Over It

Leon could tell you were something special from the moment you two battled for the first time. It happened by change, in all honesty. He had been lost and you ended up being the one to find him. You had no clue who he was, but he could tell you were a trainer. You had that air about you, and he wanted to risk it all and just battle you...so that's what he did. Out in the wild area, just you two and your pokemon to bear witness.

Leon tasted defeat for the first time that day. You had swept his entire team with two of your pokemon. He was stunned silent before a grin broke out.

After that, he became a bit attached. He began asking questions and wanting to get to know you. You had started off being very reluctant to tell him anything, but overtime you warmed up to him. After he revealed he was actually the Champion of the region, you decided to reveal something about yourself.

"So you ever heard about the incident over in Kanto with Team Rocket?" You began asking him as you two walked the wild area together.

"Odd question, but ya. I recall my mom talking about the gang being taken down by some kid. They stole pokemon, right?" He asked and you nodded.

"That was me." You said, making him stop, "I had just turned ten and went on my pokemon journey. It was custom to do that when you were ten over in Kanto...a bit weird for other regions but that's how it was back then. I got roped up into everything and ended up taking down the leader."

"You...took down a criminal gang when you were ten?" Leon was in disbelief.

"Yup...and recall hearing about the battle of Hoenn? Where there were two groups that summoned legendary pokemon? One wanted to flood the world, while the other wanted to create more land?" You asked and Leon stopped.

"You did that too...?" He asked and you nodded.

"Yup. After the Kanto incident, my mom got worried and we moved. I wanted to take another crack at the gyms though, and she let me. I was about twelve when that went down." You explaiend.

"So you've taken down...three groups?" Leon swore you had to be joking.

"When I was fourteen I moved to Sinnoh, around the same time that the Team Galactic thing was going on. Fought them and Giratina was basically released and...well I almost died on that one. He was...terrifying." You explained and Leon stopped you, putting a hand on your shoulder.

"You can't be serious..." He said, almost looking sad.

"At sixteen my mom moved to live with our aunt. I really just wanted an adventure and decided to run off and do it, despite the dangers. Ran into Team Plasma who wanted to enslave the world. I did make a good friend though, his name is N. After that I was old enough to move around. Decided I wanted to study Mega Evolution and study under Professor Sycamore in Kalos. Stop the gym battling and everything, y'know? Wanted to throw myself in research...sadly Sycamore had a friend named Lysandre that dragged me into another unwanted adventure with Team Flare." Leon just stared at you.

"Finally I went on vacation to Alola and discovered Ultra Beasts and discovered Aether Foundation wasn't as benevolent as it seemed. Ended up helping a kid named Lillie out there. That was a wild adventure. Now I'm here though; Sycamore said that he wanted to go himself since I'm still his apprentice and learn about Gigantamaxing, but he had too much work. So he sent me." You said with a sigh.

"And now you're here..." Leon said and you nodded.

"Now I'm here. Was planning on just watching the gym challenges and maybe try one of those raid dens to see everything for myself after meeting Professor Magnolia...but then I ran into you and got sidetracked." You said with a sad smile. "Kinda just hoping to have a normal adventure for once."

"I can make that happen." Leon said, a sudden burst of energy coming over him, "I knew you were amazing but I didn't know to this extent...how about you do the gym challenge. If anything pops up, I can deal with it. That way you can finally just have a relaxed adventure." Leon said and you chuckled.

"If anything pops up?" You teased, "How bad do you think my luck is?"

"It's like my sense of direction." Leon was quick to respond.

"Ouch...but fine. I'll do the gym challenge and if any criminal organizations pop up, I'll call you to deal with it, aight?" You said, holding your hand out to shake on it. He took his hand in yours and gave you a firm shake.

"Let's have a champion time."

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅• Thank you for reading! Did you know we have a discord? It has everything from RPs, General Discussions, and even an 18+ area to go hog wild in! We even do announcements early for when the inbox is opening for requests, as well as other events! Come in and join us!

[cobrabobra]

Some swearing, mentions of couple of different games

Gamer boyfriend Carl:

You two have met at a game convention, you got separated from your friend group and then you saw him, a scrawny guy in a coolest springtrap shirt you've ever seen. And that was exactly what you've told him. He complimented your outfit, asked if you wanted to see a certain panel with him and the rest was history.

At the first glance, he was very unique, he didn't necessarily look like the gamer boy type, although his long, messy hair kinda gave him away. And his eye, you thought that the bandage covering his right eye was just a part of a cosplay or something, you didn't expect it to be an actual part of Carl's everyday look.

After you've exchanged discords at the convention, you started to text almost every day, your conversations weren't very long, Carl was a very busy man (busy playing games), but they always brought a smile to your face and a warm feeling in your chest.

You found out what his favorite games were, how his family was, how his school was, how he didn't have many friends.

Carl was kind of a loner, he only had two or three friends, but he preferred it that way, he wasn't exactly good with people. When you played together he came of as shy and nervous, constantly asking if you needed help and apologizing for every little mistake, you found it cute, it meant that he somehow cared about you.

When you two got closer Grimes showed you his true colors when playing games, screaming from the top of his lungs when he died, cursing at people who stole his kills. But he was never like that towards you.

"You fucking asshole, you do that one more time and I will-! What? You need help, okay I'm coming"

He still was kind of unsure what to do around you, but he became more and more confident, though he still was adorable.

You suspected that he might have some romantic feelings for you when he bought you a fifty dollar skin, just because you said it was pretty. He also helped you get kills and boosted you in ranked matches.

"Okay, he's low, come here and kill him. No don't worry, I will get another kill."

Of course, you had to be the one that confesed their feelings first and you were happy you did, Carl never sounded so happy.

You started to visit him, came over for sleepovers, to play games together and make out awkwardly.

"Carl when are you finishing?" You asked, sitting on his bed and scrolling through your phone, waiting for him to end.

"I would've already if that stupid twat stopped feeding our opponents! Stupid cunt." He just said, his voice raspy from yelling at his teammate.

You just laughed and shook your head. Your boyfriend was a piece of work.

You would've never thought that you had such strong influence on Carl, at some point he stopped throwing his mouse across the room when he lost and instead he came to you, demanding you cuddle him.

"What happened, baby?"

"A creeper blew me up" he just said, his face burried in the crook of your neck. "I had a netherite pickaxe"

"I'm sorry, Carl. How about we play something together, hm? Would that make you feel better?"

"Okay, but if you think that I'll go on bot with you, you're crazy. But if you go on top, I will gank you a lot. "

Carl was very unique, a boyfriend like no other and you fucking loved him for it.

[popart-vvv]

This is a PSA...

FUCK THAT STUPID "PARODY" OF GOODBYE VOLCANO HIGH!

Why? Why?!

It was made by members of 4chan, the worst site on the internet BY FAR! The complete opposite of KO_OP--filled with right-wing rhetoric and intolerant of any piece of media that dares to be different! If you like the "parody game" and its related products, then you're saying that you support 4chan, warranting a block from me.

2. Lazy and unambitious design. GVH is all-around unique; high schoolers having to deal with the lead up to a cataclysmic event, deciding how to spend their time up to that event, and every character is an anthropomorphic dino. Plus, the game is a blend of rhythm and cinematic adventure, a novel choice in game design. Plus, the characters are all written like believable teens with understandable issues (the effects of the impending meteor, for instance), with plenty of non-forced conflict.

The OTHER game, meanwhile... stole the designs of the main characters and appropriated them into high school drama cliches, plus, the design for the main teacher blatantly rips off an Adult Swim character, for some reason. The worst part is the main character, though! It's just some muscly guy with a blank face! No eyes, mouth, hair, NOTHING ON THE HEAD! Goddammit, seriously, that is the WORST character design I have ever seen in my life!

Plus, THAT game is just another throwaway dating sim VN that can NEVER reach GVH's level.

3. LGBT ERASURE! THIS. IS. WHY. YOU SHOULD NOT LIKE THE GAME!

GVH's main characters are queer one way or another: Fang is non-binary, Rosa is a transgender woman, Sage is a transgender man, and it's possible for Fang to enter a relationship with Naomi. Reed is also hinted to be in a relationship with a male classmate, Alvin. Plus, there is some subtext regarding the pairings of Trish/Rosa and Sage/Stella, as well as in Naser's arc.

Meanwhile... THAT game is basically a vehicle by its creators to espouse 4chan bullshit. Fang is an enby when you first meet them, but their "happy ending" has the player character convince them to detransition. RED FLAG! RED FLAG! And the only endings where they stay an enby are the ones that don't give them any respect! This is bad messaging! Apparently, they're saying that the only way to find happiness in life is to throw away your queer identity! FUCK THAT SHIT!

Again, that is huge disrespect towards a likeable representation of an enby.

Note: Rosa, Sage, and Naomi's queer characteristics were envisioned DURING the rewrite, so it was after THAT game was revealed. Make of that what you will.

4. It blatantly disrespects KO_OP, and frankly, the company does not deserve it.

Goodbye Volcano High was released in August of last year, but it was actually revealed as far back as summer 2020. It was VASTLY different back then--it was more like a traditional visual novel, except with the same anthropomorphic dinos and unique designs. By the time GVH was released, it had gone through a huge story rewrite, resulting in the final product.

Unfortunately, there's a whole backstory in the development of GVH.

2020 was when COVID-19 was ravaging the world, and KO_OP's workers were struggling with the disease, putting a major dent in the game's production and delaying it for a while.

Also, the rewrite started not long after the game was revealed. Admittedly, this was due to a mistake on KO_OP's part in their choice of a writing crew, but the writing team was replaced, so good on them.

Also during development, they were harassed by 4chan and other unsavory people, culminating in THAT game. Basically, there's an undercurrent of PTSD--on the KO_OP Discord, if you bring up THAT game or any other hugely offensive content, you'll get a warning or a ban. Is it any wonder they hate THAT game?

Also, as I mentioned in a previous post, KO_OP should be admired for withstanding all that crap and releasing GVH three years after its initial announcement, the payoff being that it has its own dedicated fanbase and was nominated in three major awards ceremonies. Like GLAAD!

5. Real-World Events

Probably the worst part is that THAT game has a fanbase, even after a terribly heartbreaking event in February.

Two words: Nex Benedict.

Seriously, to still support that game, even in light of similar tragedies... That's inhumane.

*sigh*

I know this kind of post may not be your cup of tea, but I needed to get this off my chest. I love this game so much... It pains me to see that a supportive game, alongside its fans and creators, is being unfairly targeted by terrible people.

I stand by what I said in this post. I did my research before making this essay. That said, if there are any inaccuracies in here, I apologize.

However, I will not tolerate anyone who tries to argue in support of THAT game. If they do that, they get reported/blocked.

Sincerely, popart-vvv.

[gtcopter]

ok about that last post I was not actually expecting y'all to hear me out but now that you have allow me to indulge by sharing the AU I've been brainrotting about for literal months feat. Ruth and Richie also I'm so normal abt this:

Pete, Ruth and Richie are borrowers living in Hatchetfield High. They've been living there from well before they were even highschool age and it's why they're so educated and smart especially by borrower standards. They also have the school computer room to access the internet which is how they know pop culture and stuff. Richie's borrower weapon of choice is an anime pin he stole borrowed from some kid's backpack, he can use it both as a shield and to stab things and when he's not using it he wears it on his back like a shell. Pete uses one of those Chupa Chups type lollipops since not only can he hit shit with it but he can also lick it if he has low blood sugar (don't worry he puts it back in the wrapper every time). Ruth dual wields thumbtacks like daggers since she is a menace to society ❤️. They have a dopeass borrower hideout with a buncha cool knick knacks they borrowed and Pokémon cards on the walls like posters courtesy of Richie. They mostly eat school cafeteria food so pray for them. Steph is the only human who knows about them, she finds Pete first and then later Ruth and Richie. Your honor she loves her weird little guys if anything happened to them she'd kill everyone in this room and then herself. Grace keeps getting this close to discovering them but they always manage to avoid her. There's human x borrower lautski obviously which I go feral about they are so so adorable togetherrr. Also not that relevant but this coexists with my borrowers Lex and Hannah AU which I'll probably share someday :))))

shoutout to @rsitb-second-account for brainrotting with me for months now, we have a starkid g/t groupchat on discord and honestly lmk in the reblogs or dm me if you're interested in joining (I might not respond right away tho bc timezone shenanigans) we desperately need more victims I mean participants. we're gonna pioneer the g/t starkid community by god we will do it.

[kingryblog]

Bears in Trees in Denver notes (year three)

*Nick, George, Callum, and Iain walk past the line down the street*

Iain: Bye guys!! See you later!

Me, and a few others in the line: Bye! See ya!

Iain: Yeah we're not coming back!

Someone in the crowd to someone else: I like your shoelaces

The reply: Thanks I stole them from the president.

Insane to hear that irl in 2024, my brain took a screenshot lmao

While Iain was talking someone started barking from the back of the venue lmao

Someone handed out paper to put over our flashlights when Little Cellist played and the Bears faces when they saw it was so so sweet

I'm always a little nervous bringing my cane to shows but after the show someone came up to me and said how it was so cool that bring it and they've been trying to work up the courage to bring their mobility aide and it made me feel so good. If that was you and you're reading this, thank you for saying that, and bring your aide, it makes shows so much better!!

Made some awesome friends!! Shout out Lillian from the discord who was me and my siblings buddy all night.

My sibling brought their 3DS and recorded some videos and took a bunch of pictures and everyone loved it (if you look closely at the video, you can see the exact moment Callum looks at the 3DS)

I had a pack of earplugs that I bought when I realized I left mine at home and handed out the whole pack out to other who didn't have any. Definitely plan to do that again! Wear ear protection yall!!

Callum: You know what constellation I love looking up to see? *very obviously trying to hint at Cassiopeia*

Iain, dead fucking serious: Orion?

Callum: No.

Iain: Wh- Oh oh, Cassiopeia?

Callum: Ya- No- Yeah. Yes.

Iain, later in the night: I've decided I'm going to derail every bit you try to do

Me and my sibling (best friend) absolutely clutching eachother while Confetti played

Callum was wearing a jersey and someone in the crowd recognized it as a high school team from Illinois

Two (2) guitar strings broke, one during Mothe's set and one during Bear's set

Half the crowd sat on the floor inbetween sets and it was so cool, it felt like hanging out with friends and made me feel less insecure about needing to rest my knee :)

This was my first time super close to the stage (at any show) and oh my gosh when Callum went into the crowd he was Right in front of me it was so cool!!

On that note, Callum was shoeless, only socks, cover the dogs

Got close, but I didn't cry this year... My sibling on the other hand,,, well.

This year was definitely the best year so far, everything about it was so good all the way through.

@bearsintreesofficial

[ilkkawhat]

I can't believe it's almost been a year since AW2 was released. It really changed my life. For better or for worse? Who can say, but I've been having fun.

lol it's so surreal to me that it's been less than a year that I bought and played Alan Wake 2 (one month past release, in November) purely on a whim because I saw people on the silent hill subreddit talking about it and someone even made a meme about "friendship ended with silent hill now alan wake is my new best friend" and I kid you not within just a few days my life just...changed entirely.

I have a lot of depression and anxiety and somewhere in 2023 things just...went wrong and I stopped creating. stopped giffing, never thought I'd write again and drawing lmao forget it, that shit's been hard for me to do ever since a very discouraging experience back when I was maybe like, 11 or 12. stopped going on tumblr, had given up on discord a long time before then and became a miserable ghost doing nothing but burying myself in work in what i will admit is a toxic, overwhelming and stressful environment. I still played games, still watched shows but nothing was like. Sticking with me, I guess? Not like to obsession levels and minus some good vacations I was just...empty.

And playing Alan Wake 2 for the first time was a legit terrifying experience for me--not on the levels of the first time I played Silent Hill 2 maybe (legit locked myself in my room and put on my lamp in the middle of the day cause of the sound of footsteps behind me in that game lol and my dishwasher at the time sounded like that one chugging sound in the apartments) but the dread I was feeling as I got legitimately lost in the woods of Cauldron Lake and turned around in Coffee World (having basically explored it all before triggering the parts where the enemies spawn in) and the basement of Valhalla Nursing Home was thrilling and I was excited to be playing something that was so disturbing and mind bending and emotional, too. Not even knowing the story of Alan and Alice, my heart broke during Alice's final tape. Not knowing Alan's character outside of what I saw in the second game, his "fuck it" moment where he went back into the Dark Place felt so heroic. I felt an odd sense of nostalgia watching the Koskela brothers commercials, like I had known them my whole life. Alex Casey (both the FBI agent and fictional detective) is my favorite kind of wise-cracking guy who has a heart of gold, the old guy who I wish could be my dad. Tom Zane was that mysterious wild card that you know under the surface has something sinister, unsettling esp with his manipulation of Alan but is just so fascinating to watch. Of course I saw so much of my obsessive self in Rose with her shrine for Alan. Saga's time in the dark place felt so real to me, I cried and still cry every time I read that note from her mom at that part of the game (I know you can read it sooner but it packs a bigger punch with Saga's fight to get out of her own mind.) All of the characters quickly stole my heart and ran with it and maybe it was over a few days, maybe it was all at once the floodgates just...opened within me.

I started writing again. First with a character that I never thought I'd write for again because at the time, even just thinking about him legit hurt me. Then I started scheming up fics for Alan. Then I started giffing even from self-captured gameplay footage that I don't think I've ever done before. Then I started drawing in my Alan Wake journal--a journal which, I had not done since the peak of my CSI obsession during my teenage years and even then it wasn't to the extent of what that journal is now (which admittedly, has not been filled out in quite a number of weeks and maybe that's partially cause I tend to journalize myself on here too) And then one day I couldn't contain it anymore. I started sharing again. I don't talk to anybody really like, ever outside of these asks and occasional replies but I truly never thought I'd be part of a fandom again. I worried I'd fuck it all up again (still worry about that) for myself, or others. Or both. But all the kind messages, the kind tags, the awesome people I've started following because of Alan Wake, I wouldn't give any of that up.

And of course things branched off, crushing so hard on him I got obsessed with Ilkka. I played some of Remedy's other games (still working my way through Max Payne 2 and Quantum Break very very slowly) and went back to the first Alan Wake, of course which if I had known about earlier or had an Xbox I'm sure I would have loved it back then as much as I do now. Hell I even platinumed that and Alan Wake 2 and as someone who is notorious for not finishing games other than like. The Legend of Zelda series and playing some other endless games...think it says something that I've managed to beat and complete (I always do the rhymes, stashes, lunch boxes, every playthrough) Alan Wake 2 almost 10 times now.

I was happy. I'm still, for the most part when I'm not at work, happy. Call it what you want, a delusion brought on by a distraction of obsession, a dangerous escape threatening the part of me that is still rooted in reality in the way that like, what if I become too crazy about it where it blinds me to certain things or experiences or chases people away from me because I'm too weird about it (a very real thing that has happened before)

But damn with all of that...I'm having fun with it too.

[panicatthebeanfest]

i wrote a fanfic about the TTR discord server cog cup tournament that ended in a perfect tie three times

based on a true story. enjoy

The final round of the 2024 Cog Cup approached its end, and the votes were neck-in-neck between the Flunkies and the Legal Eagles. The Legal Eagles firmly believed that they had this in the bag, on account of their higher status, majestic furry appeal, and also the fact that they were cheating.

The Chief Justice opened an envelope as a flock of particularly important Legal Eagles crowded around, anticipating their assured victory. He brought the envelope to his face. After a long pause, he said "wait, I can't read."

A Big Wig snatched the paper and read it. "Oh my." they gasped.

"We won, right?" asked a Legal Eagle anxiously.

"There's no chance the Flunkies beat us!"

"They didn't, " said the Big Wig. "It was a tie."

The Legal Eagles squawked in surprise. Not only was this completely unexpected, but the implications scared each and every Cog in the courtroom: The implication that they and the Flunkies could be even remotely on the same level.

"I DEMAND A RECOUNT!" one Legal Eagle screamed.

"This is ridiculous! Absurd! Ludicrous!"

"Ludacris is NOT a flunky!" barked another. "just because they're both bald-"

"Ludacris isn't bald! " shouted another. "You're thinking of Pitbull!"

"ORDER! ORDER!" the Chief Justice demanded, slamming his gavel directly onto the head of the Big Wig, rendering him unconscious. "There WILL be a recount. We just need to cheat harder this time." 

"But how?" asked a Legal Eagle.

"I have...a plan." murmured the Chief Justice.

---

The Flunkies, who had also cheated, were now frantically running around Bossbot HQ, attempting to convert anyone who would listen to their cause. The CEO had promised the Big Cheeses that if they were to win the poll, they could have a half day on Saturday. Surely, each of them thought, he would extend the same privilege to the Flunkies. However, a perfect tie managed to manifest. Perhaps the Corporate Raiders stole one Wi-Fi router too few from the Lawbot buildings. Maybe if they had just asked *one more* Yesman, they could have secured their victory. Did they not bribe the Name Droppers generously enough? Nonetheless, a recount was in order, and their strategy had to change. The Flunkies reconvened in a random conference room with nothing in it but a table and an old coffee maker that hadn’t worked in decades.

"Guys, the tiebreaker is REALLY close." said a level 2 Flunky. 

"We're ahead by 1!" shouted a level 1 at a computer screen, but after a pause, they followed with "Oh, darn, we lost a vote."

"I don't want to make assumptions," asked a level 3, "but it almost seems like somebody is actively trying to balance the numbers."

"What!?" shouted a level 5. "That's impossible. Why would anybody do that?"

Three toons in Flunky disguises giggled quietly in the corner.

"10 seconds left! We're ahead by three!" the level 1 exclaimed. 

The Flunkies crowded around the computer, scrambling over each other to see the poll. Their numbers remained steadily ahead. "3...2...1..."

But in the last millisecond, the Legal Eagles earned exactly enough votes to tie the poll again. 

"NO!" the level 5 slammed his fists on the table. "Why, God, Why?!"

"Who's God?" asked the level 1.

Deflated, the level 5 responded, "I don't know...I thought I knew, but I don't think I do anymore..."

"There MUST be some sort of tampering afoot!" the level 3 proclaimed. "It is STATISTICALLY IMPOSSIBLE that this should occur twice by chance!"

One of the disguised toons in the corner piped up. "Unless Toontown has exactly the same amount of Cogs who prefer Flunkies as Cogs who prefer Legal Eagles... That's possible, maybe."

"NO! I literally JUST said that was NOT possible!" the level 3 stomped his foot. "Were you not listening?!"

"I heard you loud and clear," said the Toon. "What I heard was just really, really stupid."

The level 3 quickly snapped back to the others, "Who even ARE these guys?!"

"That does not matter," said the level 5, ignorant to the overwhelmingly enormous extent to which it did matter, "Right now, we need to make sure that the poll doesn't tie a THIRD time."

"If the poll ties a third time I am throwing this laptop across the room." the level 1 grumbled.

---

As the Flunkies spent a majority of the next tiebreaker's duration cleaning up pieces of the broken laptop, the Chairman sat ominously in the shadows of his office, holding his hands together close to his face as evil masterminds do. A Big Cheese entered the room.

"Sir," the Big Cheese stated, "Would you...like the light on?"

"NO.'' The Chairman's voice boomed like thunder in all 12 of the Big Cheese's earholes. Then again, that could have been the actual thunder, as it always storms in Cog Nation. The Chairman picked this geographical location specifically because it never stops storming. It really sells the evil vibe. Plus, considering that robots and water are historically not an ideal combination, it disincentivizes his employees from trying to leave.

"W-well, about the poll, sir." the Big Cheese tripped over his words. "Somehow the Toons have gained access to it."

The Chairman did not respond.

"I assure you our Cybersecurity measures were properly executed. Alas, the Toons-"

"Who are the Toons voting for?" the Chairman demanded. "I need their data...their scrumptious, delicious data."

The Big Cheese raised his eyebrows and his brain lagged for a moment, then he recovered his thought processes. "They seem to be trying to end every poll in a tie."

"...Every poll?"

"Yes, sir. We have been forced to hold two tiebreaker rounds, both of which the Toons successfully managed to tie up at the last second. However-"

"Let me think of a solution. I will only need a moment. Please wait." the Chairman loaded.

"Well, sir, if I may suggest leaving the victory to the model in the third place position, which, incidentally, WAS the Big Cheeses-" 

"Oh, ha-ha, nice try," the Chairman chuckled, grimly and quietly, but a quick jolt made his body twitch in response. "Ow! I laughed again. I'm a Cog, I can't do that." he spat. "Anyway. This is what we are ACTUALLY going to do..."

The Big Cheese waited for an answer. The Chairman did not provide one. 

"Um, sir?" asked the Big Cheese. "The plan?"

"Is this scene still going?" asked the Chairman.

"Yes, sir." 

The Chairman sighed. "I'm waiting for the scene to change. I'm sure it's going to cut somewhere stupid."

The two Cogs stood in silence for approximately enough time for a two-page document to print (assuming the printer was working in this scenario). 

"So, um...Sir, I can't help but ask." the Big Cheese prodded. "I can't see you over there. Are you... actually a robot? I've heard rumors that you're actually just the chair."

The Chairman sighed. That was definitely stupid.

---

The Legal Eagles crowded around their computer, which was significantly more sleek than the one the Flunkies had access to. The Chief Justice slammed his gavel onto the desk. 

"The Chairman has informed me that this *third tiebreaker* is set to end at a random interval within the next 30 minutes."

"Good news, sir! We're in the lead!" one Legal Eagle chirped. "Oh- nope, it's a tie again."

"Good grief, my wires are so clenched right now, I might lay an egg." another breathed.

The Legal Eagle next to him tilted his head. "...What?"

"ANYWAY, desperate times call for desperate measures..." the Chief Justice proclaimed. "It's time to put my plan into action! Big Wig! Turn on my Overpriced Fruit Brand Smart Tablet! Navigate to the poll."

The Big Wig nodded as if the CJ could even see them and proceeded to partake in the aforementioned actions. They then handed the OFBST to the Chief Justice.

"See, this is a secret I've been saving. As a Cog Boss, my votes count DOUBLE the amount. I shall now-"

"Wait, you could vote this whole time?!” a Legal Eagle cawed. An uproar started in the flock. The Chief Justice slammed his gavel onto the nearest flat surface.

"Silence. Everything is going according to plan."

The Big Wig looked down. "Was it part of your plan to vote for the Flunkies?"

The eagles screamed.

"Oh- Oh no, did I- Quick, Big Wig! Fix it!" The CJ threw the OFBST at the Big Wig, who was not technologically designed to have particularly high reflexes. He fumbled the catch and dropped the tablet. 

"PICK IT UP!!!" screamed an Eagle, who was somehow foaming at the mouth now. 

Amidst the boos and screams of the birds, the Big Wig quickly reached down to grab the OFBST. They fumbled it into their grasp and held it up. It was in sleep mode. He frantically tapped the screen to turn it on.

INCORRECT PASSCODE.

INCORRECT PASSCODE. YOU HAVE ONE MORE ATTEMPT BEFORE YOU ARE LOCKED OUT OF YOUR DEVICE.

Now, the Big Wig was screaming. "EVERYBODY SHUT UP! I NEED TO FOCUS!"

"EVERY SECOND COUNTS, MAN!" screamed an Eagle.

He took a deep breath and typed the passcode.

1. Nothing wrong with me.

2. Nothing wrong with me.

3. Nothing wrong with me. 

9. The final digit was NOT 4, because that would be far too predictable. The Big Wig had thought that this was clever when they set it, but right now, every bit their brain processed was a nanosecond less that they had to change the vote in the poll.

Holding their breath, they slammed their finger onto the Flunky button to deselect it. 

And right then, the poll closed.

"THE POLL'S OVER!" the Big Wig exclaimed. 

All of the bird noises fell silent. They all rushed to look at the results.

Finally, After hours of turmoil, vicious psychological torture, and methods of cheating that turned out to be so futile that I don't even need to make up what they would have been, the results were in.

Despite the Flunkies. 

Despite the Toons.

Despite themselves.

The Legal Eagles won by exactly two votes. 

"We won!" shouted one Eagle.

"Yes!!!" shouted another. 

"Finally! Finally we-" this Legal Eagle stopped. "Wait... what. What do we get from this again?"

The Legal Eagles cocked their heads to the sides, looking to each other for an answer none of them had. The Chief Justice slammed his gavel one more time.

"Congratulations! You all worked very hard to achieve this. And now, for your just reward! You all get to commit a mega invasion!" 

"Oh, great, more work.” an Eagle squeaked out sarcastically. “Wh- when do we have- I mean, get to do that?”

"Right now.” the Chief Justice commanded. “NOW GET BACK TO WORK."