#Magnus “I stole a lolly and then a baby” Bane

[lurafita]

Evilist of all evil, Magnus the Evil

(Super crack)

Magnus was evil. The big bad. The evilist. The biggest, baddest most evilist around. Totally. Super evil, diabolical genius with magic who was gonna rule the world!!!

... right after he gets that little girl's kitten out of that tree.

Or, how a possibly slightly crazy-ish Magnus fails at being evil, and instead finds a familiy of choice and the love of his life, in these people he keeps accidentally helping out.

(Originally posted in a Malec Discord server, where one other member added this little jewel):

Magnus is like "But I needs to do the evil today?!?🥺"

Alec: "Umm…I saw you get up to help an old lady with the groceries not 10 minutes ago AFTER you were done feeding kittens on the street…?"

Magnus: "🥺 But…evillll"

Alec: What if you were evil to the bad guys?

Magnus: They're not bad they're just misunderstood 😔

Alec : 😒

(Which made me add this as well):

(Magnus saying the bad guys are misunderstood got my brain going like): Magnus: "Like those guys that kidnapped me earlier." Alec: "You were kidnapped?!" Magnus: "Yes, see, they lured me into this white panel van with promises of 'a good time'." Alec: "Hasn't anyone had the 'stranger danger' talk with you?!" Magnus: "Of course. I'm a danger to the stranger, because I'm evil. Now, back to the gentlemen in the van. As soon as I was close enough, three of them grabbed me and one tried to chloroform me. Which of course didn't work, because I'm much more evil and therefor stronger than them. So after I beat them, we had a long talk. Turns out they got me confused with some rich heir to some family fortune, who they wanted to ransom back to his parents for lots of money. Money which they then wanted to use to pay off the hospital bills for the kid of a dead friend of theirs. Turns out the widow is badly in debt because of that and might lose the house, and then she and the kid will be homeless. But you know how much can go wrong with kidnappings, especially of people who are very rich and well connected. And these guys clearly weren't cut out for that. So I helped them rob a bank instead." Alec: "…"

(And another)

Alec gets home one day to the sight of Magnus rocking a toddler on his lap. The toddler is giggling happily, inbetween sucking a big lolly pop. Magnus has a similar lolly pop between his lips. Alec is… concerned. Alec: "Magnus? Why is there a child?" Magnus: "Well, it all started with me stealing the lolly." Alec: "You stole candy from a kid?" Magnus: "It's the evilist thing one can do, so I had to. It's the law. Anyway, I swapped out the kids lolly with a new one, because I may be evil, but I'm not a monster. And then I realized that the kid's lolly had been poisoned." Alec: "Oh my god are you okay? Should I call Cat?" Magnus: "Don't worry, Darling. I'm much too evil for this weak kind of poison to affect me. But the kid would have bit the dust, no question. A little investigating then led me to the kid's uncle, who is the legal guardian of the little one, and tried to get rid of him to get his hands on the money the dead parents left the kid in their will. So then I sent the uncle to my father and stole the kid."