#i still have about 40 pics left... i think

[dashing-through-ecto]

The difference one and a half years can make

My first comic

My latest comic

It's been absolutely staggering to see the differences even though these panels have the same vibes.

[shotofstress]

Coming back after being almost a week without electricity, phone, and internet connection. Huge storms with lightning and rain, and winds. We have never have winds like that here and the roof of so many houses were ripped off, stuff flying, etc. All this bc global warming, and the deforestation and mining in our lands. At this rate, in 5 years we will have tornadoes, a thing we have never ever have here. Nor our lands, infrastructures, states, and culture are prepared for this. Areas of the country are devastated, ppl have died, many are without electricity nor Internet connection so they are isolated. The houses are flooding with water, and the ones that not, are leaking from the ceiling. Too many neighbours and compatriots don't have roofs and the streets are full of fallen trees and pieces of roof material, no electricity, no signal, food rotting, but suffering at the same time for the cold of this terrible winter, and trying to do something, patching even when its gonna go to hell when the storm comes again this next days. More than 33,200 people affected and 41,500 isolated due to 5 days of rain and windstorms. In just a couple of days there were 170,000 homes left without power due to wind and rainstorms and even more as time went by.

If u want to help me to fix the roof, walls, to buy food and being warm this winter please check my PayPal. If u can't donate, please reblog bc thats the only way to make this being seen by ppl thus receiving help. I'm really not being able to keep living like this, i can no longer cope, so please share.

Here are in my PayPal or MACH . I took the kofi link bc they were charging me a fee.

Please, educate about global warming and the effects on Global South, specially for working class, chronically ill, autistic, disable, and long covid survivor ppl like myself.

Edit: I added links and pics

Edit: the weather is better (is finally spring at this current date 24th nov), but I still need to fix were I live/sleep bc the walls are broken and one of the walls is not a wall, but like 1cm wide stuff and all was bad build so even the door is twisted and dont work correctly, there is black mold that i think is damaging my ears, the paint is falling, the lamp has fallen, everything is broken and ugly, etc. I still need to buy food, meds, and everything so please, please, share or donate if you could. I don't want to survive like this and here, no one mask even when they were the ones giving me covid and they have making me also catch flu the other day bc they cogh over everything and don't care if they kill me, they are abusive and really violent people and are working to put me and everyone in danger. I dont even want to be in my country bc we will have a dictatorship soon, but I have nowhere else to go nor money to migrate (i need like $10.537 dollars or € 9.760,95 euros to pay all the documents, the bank money I have to show to prove I am a human being deserver of rights, the tickets, rent money and stuff to migrate).

I currently have $100 dollars donated (coz i spent 40 in food and meds this past month)

I know i will die here, but at least help me to survive in a less dehumanising way.

Edit: tumblr has blocked me from recive or send messages from the chat and comment of posts, so if you are trying to reach throughout there I can't see it, sorry, I'm cut from any communication (cant even see past messages from chat or asks), except send asks. I'm waiting that tumblr do something, but still hasn't even answered the help file I sent to them.

[milla-frenchy]

After

2k8 | Joel Miller x fem reader | ao3 Summary: you want Joel and finally get the opportunity to have him Warnings: 18+ mdni. Virginity loss, age gap (reader is 23, Joel is in his late 40s), dirty talk, praise kink, oral (f/m), piv a/n: @aurorawritestoescape thank you for beta reading, and for holding my hand with this one 💕🫶 Pic for mood only

Masterlist

***************

You had been watching the exchanges between Joel and Fedra soldiers for several weeks and finally he got scammed by one of them. When you offered him a new deal, you had a hard time hiding your satisfaction.

“You fucked up, Joel. Trusted the wrong guy,” you said with a smirk, “But I can help you.” 

You had known him for several years. He sometimes did business with your father and never seemed interested in you. You were just “the daughter of”. He looked at you before letting out a surprised “You?”

“Yeah, me. Those supplies you need, I can get them for you. Come to my place tonight. I’ll show you a part of them and tell you how to get them all.”

He sighed, nodded, and left for his shift.

You heard his heavy footsteps on the stairs and opened the door before he knocked. He must have worked in the sewers that day because he had showered and changed. His hair was slicked back and still slightly wet.

“Ok, show me the supplies.”

You took out half of them, having watched his previous exchanges. You spied on him regularly, but you never thought you'd have the chance to get some kind of leverage over him.  You had your own apartment in the QZ, where you lived alone after moving out of your father’s place. 

No man interested you, except Joel. In recent years, you started looking at him differently. His gaze, his broad back, his hands obsessed you. At night, in your bed, you thought of him when your fingers rolled over your clit or when you rubbed yourself lying against your pillow. You imagined his body against yours. His kisses on your neck, his hands on your breasts. You imagined what you would have felt if he’d buried his length inside you. You wondered what his cock looked like and a few times, when you met him, you dared to lower your gaze to his crotch.

You had boyfriends before, but never did more than quick handjobs and blowjobs. None of them wanted to go further and you suspected them of being afraid of your father. You thought Joel would know how to deal with you. And now you had leverage.

“What’s your price?”

“I wanna have sex with you”, you replied confidently, making him laugh.

“You’re just a kid. Ain’t gonna fuck you.”

“I’m not a kid, I’m 23.”

“That’s what I said. A kid.”

“Come on, Joel. You can have all these supplies, just after having sex with me. Could be worse, don’t you think?”

“What about your dad?”

You rolled your eyes.

“I’m not asking you to fuck my dad, right?”

He smirked.

“You really want my dick that bad, that you’d give me all the supplies for it?”

“Yeah, in fact I do.”

He sighed. “Ok, your choice. Make me hard, if you want it that bad.”

You smirked and kneeled before unzipping his jeans. When his cock slipped free from his boxers, your lips formed an O. He was semi-hard, and already his size was impressive.

“Fuck”, you breathed out.

“Your boyfriends don’t have these kinda cocks? Come on, suck it.”

His hair there was slightly graying. He smelled of soap. You took his cock in your hand and collected the precum with your thumb.

“Spit on it.”

You did as he said, and you started jerking him off. He was getting harder. You licked his tip, lingering your tongue on his slit, filling your throat with his taste. You rounded your lips and took him in your mouth, applying yourself, breathing through your nose. You inwardly thanked the cocks you had practiced on before. Your head was bobbing and rising, and he was now fully hard. His cock was filling your entire mouth, precum flowing, and his taste was intoxicating you.

“Yeah, just like that. Keep goin’. You’re doing great.”

It was the first time a man spoke to you this way, and you were soaked. Gaze fixed on him, you took his cock out of your mouth and licked his entire length. From the base of his shaft to the slit. Then you licked one of his balls and took it in your mouth.

“Fuck…yeah, keep goin’. Didn’t know your father raised such a slut.”

You moved to the other ball, still jerking him, your thumb caressing his balls.

“Yeah…shit. Take my cock in your mouth again now. Keep suckin’ baby, just like that.”

His praise encouraged you. His hand was on your head, not applying any pressure. But when you took him back in your mouth, he held your head between his palms.

“Gonna fuck your throat now.”

He pushed all the way in, slowly, but giving you time to get used to his girth, to breathe calmly.

“Stay like that, don’t move. Yeah…good girl.”

He pulled back until only his tip remained in your mouth, and thrusted in again, faster, hitting the back of your throat. Again, he held you against him, your nose buried in his hair. Then he fucked your throat. You heard him grunt, and you were afraid he would shoot his cum down your throat. Like the other guys before. But Joel wasn’t like them. He was fucking your throat for a while, letting you catch your breath from time to time by pulling out. He was smirking watching the string of saliva connect your mouth to his cock. Finally he released you.

“Lie down on the bed and take off your clothes. Show me that cunt.”

You took off your clothes: t-shirt, jeans and panties, lay down and spread your legs, showing him your dripping pussy. He stroked himself a few times, eyes on you.

“You really want that? Ain’t got any boys of your age to fuck you?”

“Don’t want them.”

He looked at you again and shrugged before taking off his clothes.

“Need to stretch you first. Don’t wanna tear that slit.”

Shivers ran through your body when he placed his mouth on your folds and his tongue ran over them. “Fuck,” you moaned. Other men had gone down on you before, but he was different. Joel was eating you like a starving man, lapping at your pussy, drinking all the wetness that flowed from it. And he was hot. He was looking at you with a piercing stare while his tongue was buried in you. His broad shoulders were forcing your thighs open, and his hands were keeping them against the sheets.

“Yeah, you really want it��,” he growled between your thighs. And he was right. You wanted him, you wanted all of him, and you were moaning nonstop. He placed his lips around your clit, swirled his tongue over it and pushed his middle finger into your core, making you whimper. He added his index finger and you winced.

“You’re fuckin’ tight…when was your last fuck?”

“Shit, who cares? Keep goin’.”

He shrugged again, and thrusted both of his thick fingers into you. You focused on your clit, moaning. He was fucking your cunt with his digits easily now. You felt your wetness flowing down to your ass.

“Gonna cum for me? Come on, baby, you can do it. Give it to me, then I’ll fuck you.”

He sucked your clit again and your body shuddered, squirming under his tongue and fingers.

“Good girl. Good fuckin’ girl, clenching on my fingers like that. Want to get fucked that bad, uh? I’m gonna give it to you now.”

He carefully removed his fingers, and lapped between your folds one last time. When he stood up, you looked at his cock, hard as steel now, and you felt your cheeks heat up.

“Sure you can take it?”

“Yeah…yeah, I can take it, Joel.”

He nodded and laid between your thighs, cock in his hand, and he pressed it against your entrance before pushing lightly. You gasped and he pulled out.

“What is it?”

Your eyebrows were furrowed, and a tear ran down your cheek.

“Fuck, don’t tell me…don’t tell me you’re a virgin?”

He looked at you with wide eyes. You nodded shyly.

“Damn, what’s wrong with you? I ain’t gonna fuck you.”

“Please, Joel! I want it. Please.”

“I…fuck…sweetheart, I ain’t for first time. That cock ain’t for first times. I'm sorry."

“Please. Just…I don’t know, go slow?”

“Shit…It’s one thing to fuck you. Being your first time, is something else. The fuck is wrong with you? Can't you have your first time with a good boy in a decent place…But not with me, not as my payment.”

“Stop protecting me, or whatever you’re doing. Just fuck me. How many times do I have to tell you I want it?”

He looked at you, hesitant. You expected him to shrug but he didn’t. He laid between your thighs again. His tip nestled at your entrance. He pushed in again, slowly, his eyes locked with yours. He must have felt you tense, even if it was involuntarily, even if you wanted it, and he caressed your cheek. He pressed his lips to yours with a sweetness you didn’t expect coming from him.

Joel’s ruthless attitude was well known in the QZ. And here, right now, he was offering you an unexpected kindness. His lips were warm and soft. You felt your heart race when his tongue sought yours, passing the barrier of your lips. His cock twitched inside your walls. Before kissing you, he had paused pushing in, only his tip nestling inside you. He pulled away from your face and took your hands in his. He placed them on either side of your head, against the mattress, and said, “hold my hands, baby. Hold ‘em tight.” His body was warm against yours. Somehow, you felt reassured by his weight pressing you down. 

So you squeezed his hands, and he looked at you, pointing his chin towards you, as if to say “ready?” You nodded, and he thrusted in again, muttering  “fuck” through his clenched teeth.

He pushed halfway inside your pussy and you closed your eyes. “Look at me,” he murmured. You bit your lip as you opened your eyes, struggling not to tell him to stop, not to let the fear overwhelm you. He pulled back, his eyes in yours, keeping just the tip at your entrance, before thrusting in again. This time he didn’t stop. You squeezed his hands tighter and held your breath, until he bottomed out. He rested his forehead against yours, pausing deep inside you, and said, “Breath, sweetheart. You’re gonna be ok.”

He pulled back before thrusting in again, his movements were smooth and gentle. Your pain was gone, and the way he buried himself inside you, caressing your folds, made you squeeze his shaft. Your gaze remained fixed on his, devouring him. His brown eyes, his furrowed eyebrows, the brown curls of his now dry hair.

He stopped again and you pleaded “no, no, no, please, don’t stop. It’s…it’s good, it doesn't hurt anymore.”

“I know, baby, but…fuck. I need a minute. You’re too tight. Lemme…hold my breath, ok? Or I ain’t gonna last.”

You nodded, but you had a hard time stopping your hips from rolling towards him. You didn’t want it to end, didn’t want to stop feeling him in you. So you focused on him again. His nose, his mustache, his lips, and his patchy beard. You let go of his hands and placed yours on his biceps. You wanted to feel his muscles under your fingers, the warmth of his skin under yours.

“Shit…ok. How do you feel, baby?”

“I’m ok, Joel. Told you I could take it”, you said proudly with a cute smile - at least you hoped.

He smiled and kissed you again, as he started to fuck you, a little deeper this time, slightly faster.

You roamed your fingers over his arms, his shoulders, his back. His lips left yours, and his nose ran across your cheek before brushing your neck. His soft mustache made you shiver, and when he kissed the delicate skin there, everything you had imagined about him came back to you. He was perfect, just like in your fantasies.

He was fucking you slowly again, and you spread your thighs to feel him deeper in you. He was rubbing his pelvis against your clit, and you felt another orgasm building. Different from all the others you had so far. A deeper one, coming from the depths of your body, and you were moaning at every thrust.

“You like it, sweetheart?”

“Yes Joel, it’s so good…I don't want it to stop, please, don’t stop..”

He kissed your neck again, and said “I won’t. I know you’re good. You feel it coming?”

“I…fuck, yeah! How do you know?”

He gave a confident little nod, just as your orgasm overwhelmed you and made you clench on his cock. You whimpered and he held you tighter against him, his arms under your shoulders. 

He whispered in your ear, “you’re such a good girl, coming on my cock. Damn, you’re squeezing me so tight baby.”

You could barely hear him, and your body was still trembling.

“Joel…,” you whined.

“I know, baby, I know…You’re ok. You’re ok.”

He kept thrusting into you the whole time, slowly, deeply, and you felt like his cock was made for you. You knew it was a dangerous thing to think, but couldn’t help it. 

You heard him whisper in your ear again, “wanna try something, sweetheart?”

“I’m not sure if I can-”

He stopped moving, and placed his hands on your cheeks.

“Do you trust me?”

You nodded. Of course you trusted him. Right here, right now, he seemed to be the most trustworthy person in your world.

“I’m gonna lay on my back, and you’re gonna ride me. I’ll help you if you need me.”

You nodded again, and when he withdrew you whimpered, crying his loss as silently as you could. He lay down on his back, and when you saw the stained sheets you froze. “It’s ok. Nothing that can't come off after washing. And if it doesn't go away I'll give you other ones.”

You realized that he was constantly reassuring you since he found out that you were a virgin, and had never been rough. Your heart sank again.

You straddled him and whispered “how do I do it?” You felt inexperienced and clumsy, but once again he didn’t judge you.

“Take my cock in your hand, use me how you want it. You’re in control.”

You positioned his tip at your entrance and he nodded encouragingly. You lowered yourself onto his shaft, feeling your pussy welcome him. You didn't dare take all of him at first, and you rolled your hips slightly, your chest against his.

“Yeah, just like that baby”, he said, caressing your back.

When you felt like you could take more, you welcomed him deeper, whimpering in his neck, rubbing your cheek against his beard, as if to forget the heat in your core. You slid down his shaft, your hands roaming his cheeks, his neck, his torso. You wanted to feel everything. To fill all your five senses with just him.

You sat up, ready to take him fully. He placed his large hands on your breasts and hard nipples. You welcomed his warmth and covered his hands with yours. You were feeling his cock differently. Deeply. You looked at him, he seemed wrecked and you didn’t expect it. 

“I’m not gonna last much longer. Rub your clit now, baby. Come on my cock one last time”, he said.

You nodded, and placed your finger on your clit. You felt fully exposed and vulnerable in front of him, but there were no red flags in him. You wondered if that would change the next time you’d see him, if he would avoid you. You pushed the idea out of your mind, focusing on your sensations. You kept riding him, eager to show him you were learning how to do it right. How much you loved it. And you truly did. Your finger was swirling over your clit, and you couldn’t believe that another orgasm was building in you. 

“Joel…I’m gonna cum again, it’s…fuck, it’s so good.”

“Yeah, you like that, baby? Can feel it…you're gonna clench on my cock again? Gonna soak it, till you’ll drip on my balls?” His words made you whimper and you came a third time on his cock. Your head fell back, and he waited as long as he could before he lifted you up lightly and pulled out. He jerked off quickly, then spurted his cum against your thighs and your pussy, growling. 

You laid against him, both of you trying to catch your breath, and he held you in his arms. You knew that you wanted to feel him again. To feel his lips, his hands on you. His cock in your mouth and in your cunt. You played tough when he arrived at your place, and now you felt different, your heart wanted to be filled too.

Again, the word “after” flashed in your mind, and pain twisted your heart.

****************

Thank you for reading 🙏

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated ❤️

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@pascalsanctuary @littlemisspascal @survivingandenduring

[buckyalpine]

Please do a teeny story where buckys kitty is all over a y/n and he is so flustered about it. These pics of my cat who is a Turkish Angora. I like to think he might look a bit like Alpine 😉

I'm here for all the domestic fluff rn. WHAT A CUTE BABY PLSSSS absolutely yes your fur baby looks like such a little angel. That is most certainly Bucky's sweet Alpine.

Bucky finally moved into a new apartment. One with proper heating and lighting. A comfy bed he actually liked to sleep in. Furniture he picked out. It was a simple space but he liked it. He even got a few plants and hung up a few pictures, most of them with Sam and Steve.

His favorite place was surprisingly the kitchen. After years of tasteless mush and not exactly feasting every day back in he 40's, Bucky loves trying experimenting with different recipes and recreating ones he remembered his ma making for him.

Then there was his favorite thing in the whole world. A little white ball of fur that would slink around his legs all day, meowing for pets and cuddles, purring so loudly Bucky was sure the neighbors could hear. He'd never meant to get a cat but all it took was one charity event at a local animal shelter and the rest was history. He couldn't resist those adorable blinking eyes and soft, wispy fur.

-

"Alp?" Bucky rubbed his eyes, curious as to why there wasn't a fuzzy motor boat purring on his chest while the sun streamed through the curtains. "Where'd you go, baby"

It wasn't rare for Alpine to wake up earlier than Bucky, sauntering around the apartment to lay under a patch of sun. He swung his legs over, making his way to the kitchen to make breakfast for both him and his cat only to find the apartment empty and the cat door swinging.

"I should've never installed that" Bucky groaned to himself, deciding to continue making breakfast in hopes that Alpine would be back shortly whilst also wondering why he thought it would be a good idea to give his cat a sense of independence. Moments later, Bucky heard the swinging of the flap, announcing the arrival of the fur ball.

"Where did you go" Bucky cocked his head, noting the way his cat was smugly licking his lips before jumping onto his cat tree and stretching out for a nap. "For fucks sake, you're worse than Steve, running off God knows where and doing who knows what"

A knock of the door broke Bucky away from the conversation he was having, his eyes growing wide seeing his pretty neighbor on the other side.

"H-hi" Bucky stuttered, smiling down at the PJ's you were still in along with soft bunny slippers on your feet, sleep still evident on your face. Before either of you could speak, Alpine trotted over, walking right past Bucky and straight to you. He stood up on his hind legs with needy meows, batting his eyes as best as he could, something he very clearly learned from his owner.

"Alpine" Bucky hissed, his cheeks growing red while his cat continued to paw at your leg, trying to climb you like a tree, begging to be picked up.

"Is he yours" you giggled, picking up the fussy cat in your arms, letting him adjust himself until he was comfy, his eyes closing for a nap. "He was at my door this morning"

"You can't nap there baby" Bucky sighed, embarrassed over the fact that his cat was rubbing himself all over you plus he'd clearly just revealed Alpine wore the pants in the relationship. "Yeah, he's mine. I'm so sorry, he's usually not like that, he usually runs away from people-

"It's okay" you cooed at the content cat in your arms, giving him another snuggle before turning to Bucky again. Something silver in your hand caught his eyes, running and hand over his face when he realized what you were holding.

His cat was a menace.

"He left this at my place while coming for a visit. Thought I should bring it back to its rightful owner, Sargent" You said shyly, handing over Bucky's dogtags, your breath hitching as your fingers brushed over his metal hand, placing them in his palm.

"Supposed I should give this back to you as well" you handed over Alpine, torn between wanting to cuddle the fur baby more and also feeling jealous of how comfy he must've felt in his daddy's thick arms, resting against his strong chest-

Get a hold of yourself.

"Thank you, doll" The pet name slipped out on is own making both of you giddy again. "I-I was just about to make breakfast, if you want to come over in half an hour" Bucky offered, nervous at how your react, butterflies bursting in his tummy when your eyes lit up.

"I'd love that" You gave Alpine one last scratch behind the ears before retracting back to your apartment to get changed while Bucky closed the door behind him.

"I know you want a mommy but you can't just plant yourself into the arms of the first pretty girl you see" Bucky's muffled voice carried through the door making your cheeks heat up, smiling to yourself when Alpine meowed in response.

"I know you have good taste but you know I would've asked her out eventually. You didn't have to drag my dogtags there"

"Meow"

"I'm not scared"

"Meow"

"I'm not!"

"...Meow"

"Fine. But you let me handle this when she comes over"

"Meow"

[justwinginglife]

Omg! Hii!

Anyways, I would love for you to write something like, maybe y/n is petty, because soshiro and y/n were both battling it out for the vice captain job? Soshiro Thinks Y/n hates his guts because shes always roasting him. Oneday, he stumbles opon her diary, and finds out shes actually a die-hard simp

OH MAYBE SHE SAYS SOMETHING LIKE "I love it when he bosses me around' EHEHE

Anyways love your fics!! <3

@soshirohoshinasimp Yay it's you again! Hello dear, so happy you love my fics! Appreciate you so much. I hope you continue writing as well! Also, thank you so much for this prompt, I had so much fun writing it, it's definitely one of my favs.

Follow Me

You and Hoshina butt heads so frequently it was a wonder your heads weren't permanently mashed together at this point.

It started when you both met during the Defense Force Exam- he had already taken down a third of the kaiju in the arena and he had the nerve to snatch one of your kills from you, the attention-seeking bastard. You had your gun aimed and ready, finger curled around the trigger, about to shoot, and he swooped in and sliced the kaiju to bits. In response, you chased him all over the training grounds, sniping every beast he went after before he could even react. And that was how he found out that there was actually someone who could keep up with his speed. Yeah, he was annoyed as shit, which pleased you immensely.

Then, when you were both rookie officers in the same division, you'd constantly be competing over combat power. He'd increase his stamina through vigorous training, bragging to you that he was at 40% and then you'd shoot back that he was still too damn slow because you were at 45%. Then he'd learn a new sword style technique and hit 50% with a smug look on his stupid face and you'd rush to keep up, vowing to him you'd make him choke on your dust one day when you left him behind. Sometimes you'd swear that just the act of pissing you off upped his combat power because it gave him the biggest rush. Some days, you weren't even sure if he cared about the numbers anymore, he just liked to push your buttons. Well you always pushed right back.

You accidentally glimpsed some old pics of Hoshina when he was a kid and you realized he'd had the same haircut his entire life so he must have one hell of a consistent barber. And that barber had to have hella dirt on him, having known him his whole life. So, of course, you tracked down his barber (like any sane person would do, right?) and coaxed him into telling you stories about Hoshina when he was little.

The next day, the base was abuzz with gossip about the time that Hoshina almost drowned at the hair salon because he tried to scoot further up in his chair while his barber was still shampooing him and he hit his head on the faucet, choking down the water in the process, and Hoshina just knew you had something to do with it. After all, how could it have not been you? You had the most satisfied, most devilish look on your face all day, though you never admitted it was you who spread the rumors.

After that day, it seemed nothing was off limits anymore. Hoshina spread hideous pictures of you with braces on when you were a teenager all throughout campus (to this day, you were still unsure how on earth he found them, you thought you'd destroyed all trace of the evidence) and as payback, you hid erectile dysfunction medications in his bag and then slit a hole in the bottom of it so when he spilled the contents of his bag in the locker room the next day in front of all the other officers and then denied it vehemently the other officers just took his denial as further confirmation of his... issue.

But as nasty as both of your pranks seemed, some of them were actually quite amusing, even endearing. You'd had a bad day at work one day and to cheer you up (you think), Hoshina set a litter of puppies loose in your bedroom. You did have a shit ton (pun intended) of shit to clean up after that, but it didn't matter, you'd already cheered up when you saw their adorable wagging tails and big round eyes. So, to repay him, you filled every square inch of his room with bottles of his favorite coffee. He couldn't sleep on his own bed for weeks, but at least he had a long lasting supply of wake-up juice.

And the two of you got to know each other extremely well through all this competing and bickering. He'd figured out what time you liked to go to your favorite bakery and he'd buy out their entire stock of your favorite pastry before you got there. It took you awhile to figure out how they were always cleaned out of only your favorite snack everyday, but then one day you got injured in a fight and you found him leaving a chocolate croissant by your hospital bed when you woke up.

It seemed like things were taking a different turn than you'd thought, and maybe the two of you could actually be friends for once, instead of rivals.

But then you both got the same letter saying that one of you would be the new Vice Captain of the Third Division and it all depended on your performance going forward.

"Only 70% combat power, huh? Not very 'Vice Captain' of you. Maybe I'll have less competition than I thought." You'd smugly say to him in passing.

He'd roll his eyes and say, "Oh yeah? And how's that training of yours going by the way? Cuz I could've sworn I beat you by nearly half a mile in that last marathon, getting slow in your old age?"

You were the same damn age as him. Fucker.

But even though the two of you would tease each other like you always did, you could tell that this time things were different. There were actual stakes on the line and one of your futures would be greatly impacted by this. You were both so young, it would be an impressive feat to be Vice Captain at this age. Both of you wanted that badge of honor to parade around.

Eventually, you were neck and neck. Both about 90% each. For the first time you were evenly matched. It was anyone's call who'd be the next Vice Captain.

It even crossed your mind that neither of you would ever be Vice Captain and the two of you would just be locked in a life long battle to be better than the other. But one day, something changed your mind and changed the course of both of your futures.

You saw him training someone in secret, someone who had absolutely no chance of being in the Defense Force and honestly had no business being in the Defense Force with how weak he was. But Hoshina saw his potential and he spent his free time nurturing that potential. That made you think about all the other little things Hoshina would do like this.

If someone was down about their skill level, he'd always point out something that was so obviously impressive about them and his simple logic would always win them over, cheering them up. Because how could he be wrong if it actually made sense? He'd say it like it was a simple statement, like he was just reciting a fact, but you knew he'd put thought into trying to comfort them.

If a kaiju was particularly difficult to defeat, Hoshina would look at all the angles, strategizing different ways to bring them down, ways that normal people wouldn't even consider. Even if it was crazy, if it was possible, if it would save more people, he'd do it with no hesitation.

He was fearless and strong, but he was also selfless and kind. And you'd started to adore that about him.

So you wrote a letter to the Captain of the Third Division withdrawing your desire to be Vice Captain, saying you'd follow wherever Hoshina led.

It was your little secret. Until it wasn't.

You swore you saw Hoshina coming out of your room one day, but when you didn't find it filled to the brim with anything, didn't see any trace of his usual pranks, you thought you might have imagined things.

But then when he ignored you for an entire week, not even bothering to tease you or respond to your teasing, you knew something was very wrong. You even started to miss him annoying you, and that realization deepened the pit in your stomach even further.

Then he showed up at your door.

"Can I... can I come in?"

You stared at him for a moment. "Um... sure?" You stepped aside awkwardly, unsure what was about to happen, but you missed him so much you'd let it happen anyway.

He paced in front of your desk for a moment and then he finally said, "I got the Vice Captain position."

You smiled. "Congrats. I'm happy for you."

He groaned at that. "Don't. Don't do that, don't say that. I only got the position because of you."

You raised an eyebrow at him, wondering what he could be talking about. Surely he didn't know about your letter... right? "What do you mean? You got the position because you deserved it." Your words were still true, you did feel he was the best person for the job.

"Yeah but you wrote that damn letter. At first I was so pissed at you, and then I was so pissed off at myself for feeling like I couldn't have gotten the spot without you."

You gulped. Well shit. Cat's out of the fucking bag now.

"Hoshina-"

"No, I'm not done yet. Let me finish."

You let him continue but you sank into the couch, feeling like the shock of having this conversation was too much to handle standing.

"I read your diary. I felt like we'd been so stressed lately competing for Vice Captain, I thought a lighthearted joke would bring us back to where we were before, so I wanted to see what I could do to get you to smile again. So I flipped through your diary, and yes, I know where you hide it, don't even give me that look- you're not very good at hiding things and you know I know you too well for this."

He chuckled softly, shaking his head. The familiar sound eased your nerves a little. Just a little. You still held your breath as he continued, wondering just how much he read.

"I was shocked by the way, here I was thinking you hated me and I come to find out that you think it's cute when I boss you around and you actually like being around me." He teased, nudging you playfully.

You flushed at that but remained silent.

"But then I read that you'd sent in the letter withdrawing from the running. I was so furious I couldn't even read the rest. So I sulked for a week. But now I'm here. And I want to know why. I know you well enough to know this can't be a joke. You'd never throw away something so important for the sake of a prank, so tell me why. Why'd you do it?" His eyes were desperate and pleading and you knew you couldn't lie to him.

You cleared your throat, meeting his gaze even though every part of you wanted to look away. "I meant what I said. You deserve the position, more than me even. I'm strong, but I don't inspire people the way you do. I'm fast, but I don't rally people the way you do. And I care about people, but you love people. You were meant to do great things and I guess I just realized I wanted to watch you do them. I'll follow wherever you go, Soshiro."

It was his turn to flush now, realizing that this was the first time you'd ever called him by his first name, and with such sincerity no less. His breath caught in his throat as he tried to compose the right words to say. He finally settled on mumbling, "You always were a pain in the ass, you know that?"

You laughed at that, a real genuine laugh and it made him smile. "I could say the same for you. But you know... I can't seem to live without you being a thorn in my side anymore. Is that so strange?"

He shook his head quickly. "I feel the same. It's like I need you near me or I can't go on with my life."

You both go silent as the weight of this realization hits you hard.

"Follow me. Be by my side. Wherever I go, I want you there with me," He said finally, quoting your earlier words. He held a hand out to you and you took it, squeezing it tight and then pressing a kiss to it.

He's shocked but then he says with a smirk, "I think you missed." He points to his lips.

"Yeah, no, you're going to have to buy me dinner first." You tease, nudging him with your shoulder.

He grins widely and you take in the sweet sight.

"I can do that. I'll buy you a million dinners if that's what it takes."

[blingblong55]

This town -Simon "Ghost" Riley

pic credits: @ave661 (middle and right)

Based on a request: (Its a long as so I'll link it so you can read the anons idea) Link here ---- F!Reader, childhood!friends, hidden feelings, angst, friends to strangers ---- A/N: Songs that also fit: Too Young- Louis Tomlinson, This Town- Niall Horan, Back to the Old House- The Smiths, Always you-Louis Tomlinson

It's a story to tell over at the old pub you and he used to hang around on the weekends. But how can a man begin to tell the sorrowful story? How can he explain in his bruised hands he holds the locket you gave him when you two were kids? He will maybe ask if this was a curse, the only curse an old soul like his has. 

It could've been something, it would've been something, it should've been beautiful. 

In this world, it was always he and you. Scraping your knees when jumping off the rocks near his home. Playing tag in the street until the moon greeted you and his mother would call his name. It's the kind of beginning all beautiful loves start with. Friends since childhood, went through life together and by 28, he would have proposed to the girl he had loved his whole life, 40s would be of dropping the kids at school, 50s of early retirement and 60s were for the potential grandkids, 70s would've been the stories shared of their early lives.

Would've...what a shit word that became in his life. 

In the teenage years, after you had some glow-up, you became the girl everyone knew. The pretty, popular and funny girl the school knew of. He was the friend of the popular girl, the one people barely noticed or cared for. Simon was the same kid who always had a scar or bruise on his face, compliments from his father. One thing Simon hated more than the bastard of his father was the guy you were with. Bloke knows nothing but how to wank and fuck any living thing, he recalls.

Why were you with such a guy? It was a must. Like those cheesy movies where the pretty girl stays with the popular guy, all for the status of each other. Your feelings weren't real for that guy. He wasn't funny, wasn't smart and he wasn't Simon. The boy you shared a kiss with at age 7 because of an accidental bump whilst running through the grass. 

It was during a small break between classes that you found him drinking water. You smile. He always did look good, even the stupid bruise on his jaw made him look so good. 

"Y/N," he straightens up. "Simon," you smile cheekily. "Oh no, what's that smile for?" He crosses his arms over his chest and you can't help but get lost in his honey eyes. "Well...I was wondering if maybe we can...talk?" You say, unsure of how to word this confession. "Did my mum put you up to this?" 

"No, this is...me just wanting to talk." 

"Go on," his voice softens. Does he always do this for you?

You hesitate, but what is life without words? You breathe in and say, "I like you...there I said it and... don't stay quiet because you know I get nervous and I will continue to just talk and talk and talk and-"

He cuts you off by saying, "I'm sorry, Y/N, I... don't..think..this..well I just don't feel that way for you. We're friends, nothing more," he ends his part of the conversation, pats your back as he walks away and you are left in the corridor of the school alone. 

As Simon walks to his classroom, his heart and mind fight the words that he had just said to you. Why was that mean? Did I even mean to say them? He thinks. 

Graduation happens. You and he never talked after that day. Not even a congrats or a hug, life went on without him in your life. Throughout those last months in school, he felt a feeling of regret when he'd see you with that guys arm around you. He would occasionally walk around the old park just to see if you would still go on your daily walks. 

By the time he was about to leave town, he found himself at the old house. He heard your parents moved to a new part of town, so if this was the last time he heard of you, it better be on his terms. And as he walks through the pavement, he finds himself looking at your window. He leans over a car, lights a cigarette and just waits to see if maybe you or some ghost roamed the home. 

Was it the feeling of losing a friend that hurt or losing his one chance to feel something other than pain and hatred? Maybe it's just nervous, after all, he leaves tomorrow. 

You were both just 16, it was puppy love, nothing would've lasted if he reciprocated those feelings, right?

And if it was, why does he feel some kind of hurt as he packs his bags? Why does he want to run to your new home and call your name? Is there a reason why? It's not love, it can't be love, he thinks. I'm not worthy of that, you've heard my dad, he says out loud. "Simon?" Tommy opens the door. "Tommy, not today," he looks back at his bag. "...Fuck" he whispers. 

It's been a long nineteen years since he last saw you and heard your precious voice laugh at a cheesy joke of his. Nineteen years and the feeling in his chest is still there when he arrives home. Manchester was always home for him, it was the only place he knew best when he came back. 

One day, as he was cleaning his closet, looking for his dog's leash, something fell and hit his head. "What the fu-" he looked down and there it was. 

"Why give me this?" A thirteen-year-old Simon asked you. You smile, "You said you wish you could always be near me so you can feel safe...and since I'm going to my nans for the week, have this locket on you, and I swear I'll be there. Keep it safe, okay?" you kiss his forehead before entering the car. He nods and waves, "Call me, Y/N, please!" he calls out and you nod. "Every day!" you scream out as the car drives further away. 

A smile falls on his silent lips, "...Y/N..." his thumb caresses the design. Once he opens it, he feels as if he is that young again. "Are you still there, Y/N?" He whispers and then, realisation hits. It was never nerves or whatever bullshit he told himself back then, it was love, always has. 

All the dots are connecting. For the past nineteen years, he always had some love or whatever all those hookups and awful relationships were, but never did they stick around. Never did he feel more for them than what he has always felt for you. His cold heart still beating warm when he thinks of you. You are all he has ever known, the smiles, the late-night confessions, stories, the silly inside jokes, the feeling in his chest today. 

He hasn't seen you in years, what if you don't remember him? What if when you see him, your heart doesn't call his name when he screams yours? Will you ever even forgive him? Will you wrap your arms around him and call him home like he has called you? 

He must find you, so he calls and looks for you in every corner of this place. He finds nothing, just more lost hope at every corner he looks into. His heart and mind excited each other at the thought this would be some sappy romance moment. His mind creating a script, all truths, just finding better words to tell you he loves you, loved you the moment you kissed the similar scar on the knee at the park when he cried over the pain. He's loved you from the day he learned to say your name. 

Why does he miss you so much today?

Why must you be the drug his body needs? God does he miss you and your addictive heart. 

He has been around the world, where he could've found a good woman who made him happy but no, his heart has always belonged to one girl. You. 

By the time he gets the street right, he finds you sitting down and as he smiles and nearly runs to you, he stops when he sees this image of you. 

Sitting by the fountain, he sees you and a man. His arms wrap around your body, giving you darling kisses as you chuckle. It was then that Simon Riley knew this was it. He will spend his entire life wandering earth, looking for another soul like yours. You didn't see him of course, your fiance capturing all your attention. Simon was close to not caring and pulling you away from that man, but that would be cruel. And as he tries to make up excuses for this man being near you, he sees the ring. 

Oh...oh you fool, he thinks. 

His heart is near death. It screams your name, trying to find you so it can keep beating but when you don't whisper, Simon nods and lets his heart die. Let it rot, so it can learn its lesson, he thinks. 

It would've never bloomed, Simon and you...right?

It's no use to even go and say hi. The locket that contained your picture was still in his fist. It'll be the last reminder of what was meant to be a life romancing in dark streets through town. 

In his head, the home you dreamed of will forever be just a dream. No four kids, no library, no big kitchen so you and he can dance around at midnight. No you...no him...it'll all be stuck and dead in this town. 

He crossed rivers, mountains, and enemies and survived wounds soldiers like him get, all to come home to you. And all this was for nothing. In his world, he would've married you, given you chubby babies and late Saturday mornings. No gun, no bomb and no other man would've kept him away from you. 

In his mind, he is with you. In his dead heart, he sits by and watches that chubby baby learn to walk. He would've adored seeing you in a white dress, walking to him as he wiped tears away when he d his dream of a perfect life was minutes away from being real. 

What a mess he is as he asks for another drink. A mess he never should have been if he had told you that your name is carved all over his body. 

It was this town that saw him live and it'll be this town that sees him die because if he can't have you, at least he has this place. 

A/N: Remember, I collect tears for potions, so please drop them by for collection, thank you. - The place of tears co.

Tags: @liyanahelena @mangowafflesss @goldenmclaren @ghostslillady @moonsua1 @rvivienner @Krinoid24 @iruzias @frazie99 @idklols @saoirse06 @vampsquerade @Juneonhoth @tiredmetalenthusiast @jinxxangel13 @enarien @Simonssweetgirl @luvecarson @willowaftxn83-87 @ikohniik @nobodys-coffee @strawberrychita @sae1kie @queen-ilmaree @pbcartii @Llelannie @Macnches2 @bbyfimmie @avidreadee123 @talooolaaloolla @skelletonwitch @bittermajesties @Nyx_Flower @honestlyhiswife @who-can-appease-me @ghostwifeyy @konigssultwithghost @kaoyamamegami @beansproutmafia @soapybutt17 @asianbutnotjapanese @a-goose-with-a-knife @foxface013 @sleepyycatt @believeinthefireflies95

[occasionally-victor]

some mer au sketches, this time figuring out some designs for brazilians (does. does Brazil even exist in this au-) (also kinda tweeked Richas' design to look a bit more. for water yknow) ("mer au" doesn't draw any mer)

talking about them under the cut:

!pac is aquafolk (i genuinely don't know how to call just partially fish people), he's, well, partially fish (blue fin tuna as an inspiration). He can transform from "looks human of you dont look too close" (still needs to cover fins and gills) to "40% of body is scales" (can really only happen in water). On a pic is a middle form, for when he's only with family and friends.

!mike is dryad, the three parts (just like that ribcage also has a tree spine basically) are flexible. The green stuff all over the body are not because of him being dryad, it's actually moss. That is a result of "moss disease", when basically moss starts growing on body. Unless you have been born with it or it was completely removed, it can be deadly (because the moss uhh incompatible with the host basically. however, if a person was born with it, that person will be fine, because the body was born already compatible with moss). !Mike was born with it, so it's fine, however he can't really wear clothes on top of it (it's not a requirement, it's more for a comfort of moss). Oh, and also he has a goddess wife, yeah.

!felps is a human sorcerer (or maybe enchanter idk, and he is pretty powerful). His main thing is doing potions (that's like. basically the only thing that he is actually interested in practicing). And he's like, stupidly good at it, both normal use ones and completely ridiculous ones. He carries a lot of ingredients in his ig it can be called a skirt? a 3/4 skirt's pockets. That also makes him pretty good at doing homebrew medicine, so that's neat.

both twins are human (tho for shits and giggles their very distant ancestors are catpeople, but at this point the only things left are just sharp senses) and good news they actually got to reunite again when they were just 19! slightly less trauma for them! what happened in a first place? someone just happened to accidentally dimension hop to a basically hell dimension (im actually thinking about calling it Nether fr, i think it's just a nice name tbh) when he was like 10, right on the eyes of his sister. That also led to both if them acquiring pretty powerful demons (that what basically everyone who lives in Nether called, in the same way that everyone who lives in this dimension are people) as companions.

!bagi at first thought that Jorge is her imaginary friend that appeared to help her feel less lonely after her brother was gone. She didn't question the fact that they were a bit too real sometimes (she was just 10, it didn't exactly matter to her at that point). Jorge, who is fresh out of Nether and doesn't really know how to get back anyway (the passage was closed immediately after some boy ran through it) doesn't really want to break it to a kid, so they just. Stick around and eventually become an actual friend. (a bit background for them: Jorge was a spirit, who on a way to a Rest Place (basically dimension for dead) accidentally gets stuck in Nether (it's basically normal occurrence to be stuck in some dimension on a way). Jorge basically uhhh starts consuming other spirits that were not yet found by grim reapers and by that amasses enough power to basically become a demon themselves. They do not remember any of that tho, however Jorge on themselves at this point is rather a conglomerate of spirits with og one in charge basically). When !Bagi started working as investigator (when she was 16 - she was really persistent), Jorge was actually really useful because, well, they are still a spirit, they can go through walls and all that. ig that also makes them working partners.

not going to get into how exactly the 9 years of being basically in hell went for !cellbit, but making a pact with a demon was probably the thing that saved his life the most. Rapaziada (or Chat - affectionate nickname) is a hivemind creature that manifests itself as voices in a head of host or dark evergy. At the cost of 80% of !cells memories, it's main task became to protect the host in any way possible (physical and mental). Unfortunately, surviving in Nether outside of big cities, especially for someone who is not from this dimension, requires kill or be killed mindset so. Let's just say, Chat was really good at it's job, to the point when by the time the host turned 15 the demons help wasn't really required outside of physical protection (the dark energy is pretty flexible in what is could become). When eventually !Cellbit returned to his home dimension and dare i say even got better, Chat kinda became more of a slightly annoying, but usually ignorable roommate (roommates? it is a hivemind). Also it just being there gave !cell ability to see all what considered supernatural in world (like spirits who stuck and can't move on, or demons who for one reason or another is not in Nether and all that basically), so he became a paranormal investigator? (i dont think yall know what im talking about, but he basically becomes Yashiki from Death Mark, just with a bigger field of work). He basically helps spirits move on (or destroys them if needed), help lost demons to get back to Nether (surprisingly easier than to work with spirits!) or repairs the "holes" through which others can accidentally get to another dimension.

(I'm not going to get into details now, just to set a scene: !pac, !mike and !cell first meeting was in Nether and it went as well as you would think it is (a disaster), !cell and !felps became friends a bit after !cell returned from hell and are roommates atm.) So, those 4 happened to be in the same place - a cave, that is basically right by a abandoned house on a small hill (!Tazercraft are there because they were searching for some minerals (they didn't find any). !Cell is there because he had a request from someone living in that area to check the cave because "there were some weird sounds" - the standard stuff. !Felps is there because back then he sometimes joined !cell in investigations, so that what he did that day). However, right before the reunion might have turned violent, all 4 happened to catch some barely noticeable sounds - it was however, undeniably sounds of crying. A child's crying, which kinda made them to "deal with eachother later" and go check on whoever was making the sound. What they found was a small dragon child with left leg being just. gone (now that they think about it, there was some blood on caves floor). That basically how they found Richas (and that how they went from "barely know each other with most of them wanting having nothing to do with eachother" to family)

Richas basically now has three places to live: !Tazercraft's absolutely legal laboratory they pay all taxes for, !Felps' apartment in a city nearby, !Cellbit's house right by that cave (because that cave happened to be just perfect to be somewhat of a personal office for work;) (for reference, they live pretty close to eachother, the longest distance is no more than 2 hrs by motorbike).

!Bagi, well, doesn't live over there - she lives in another city, like 8 hrs on motorbike far away. She rents an apartment with !Tina and as of recent !Mouse.

[vintagetvstars]

Rue McClanahan Vs. Barbara Stanwyck

Propaganda

Rue McClanahan - (Golden Girls, Maude, Mama's Family) - Listen to me. I have never understood celebrity crushes until I first witnessed Rue McClanahan. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen - just look at her!! Gorgeous eyes, the cutest nose, a SPECTACULAR smile - she has this adorable, princess-like quality about her AND she's also a complete hottie AND she's aware of it: she HAS THE RANGE, people!! Her two most famous roles are polar opposites, in fact: she starred in the role of naive, gentle Vivian Cavender-Harmon in Maude (and I mean. Just look her up and tell me that's not an angel!), and then went on to gain even more well-deserved fame and success as the seductive, extroverted Blanche Devereaux in The Golden Girls (a role for which she won an Emmy in 1987 - her amazing, hilarious acceptance speech can be found here: . I should also point out that both of these are comedy characters and she is HILARIOUS as them both - the comedic timing, the delivery, the expressions, she was a comedy queen!!! As for her personal life, she was just a darling - and also very funny in person, not just in her acting roles! She was a staunch supporter of gay rights and a big advocate for same-sex marriage in the US, as well as a vegetarian and a big defender of animal rights. She suffered from illness in her later years which greatly impacted her health, but she was still very active up until her death in 2010, and she even released a wonderful autobiography in 2007 titled "My First Five Husbands... and the Ones Who Got Away". In her interviews she's always gentle, soft-spoken (her voice. dear god. sweet mother Aphrodite I cannot weave I am overcome with gay thoughts), and kind, but also sharp, witty, and just a delight to watch. I could go on forever talking about her honestly. I am actually in love with her and you should be too. She's just the best! Here, have some additional pics: (pics below the cut)

Barbara Stanwyck - (The Big Valley) - she was my favourite character in the entire show when I was little and I just think more people should see that she's one of those actresses who looks even prettier as they age

Master Poll List of the Hot Vintage TV Ladies Bracket

Additional propaganda below the cut

Rue McClanahan:

The Hottie™️ of the Golden Girls, she was definitely a GILF. And her character's shenanigans were Emmy-winning but no less fun and her outfits were always on point and gorgeous, befitting her perfectly.

she!!!

as Vivian, with her fellow hottie Bea Arthur as Maude

as Blanche - look at those eyes!!!

come on, tell me you wouldn't do anything for that smile, I dare you

in her contract she specifically requested to be given all of Blanche's clothes and SHE WAS RIGHT

Okay so first of all. Rue has this way of moving around and looking at you that just-- I mean, I'm ace, but I *get* the allos. She's hot and she knows it (and she plays a character in The Golden Girls who's in her 50s, hot, and knows it as well. Which, talk about perfect casting??) But I'm mostly here to talk about the fact that she said this in her Emmy acceptance speech (paraphrased because I'm sharing the video with the right timestamp, and you should absolutely watch up until 3:40, because her delivery is UNMATCHED): "My mother said to me once [...] 'Oh, Eddi-Rue, for heaven's sake. Don't you know every kick's a boost?' There've been a lot of kicks, and there've been a lot of boosts. I'm not going to mention the people who gave me kicks... but you know who you are. And you'll be in the book." (Seriously though, do yourself a favour and watch that video. She's amazing!!) She said this, and proceeded to WRITE THE BOOK, titled "My first five husbands, and the ones who got away", which is *incredibly* funny, and such an earnest look into her life. She opens the acknowledgements with "This book is about my life and experiences as I lived them, and anyone who doesn't like it can jolly well lump it." And I mean... she's awesome. I could go on.

Rue McClanahan @ The Emmy Awards 1987

[sweetmariihs2]

Today I found and bought two new Sofia The First magazines in a magazine stand, in a town next to mine. (That's what the post is about) 🪻✨️💗

I live in a small town, I came to the neighboring city (a slightly bigger one; where there is a cinema, adequate medical care and clinics, things that are scarce in my town and everyone comes here when they need one of these things) to do an eyesight exam, because recebtly I've been feeling my vision getting worse. Going to the clinic, I found a magazine stand on the other street, and I asked my family (who were with me) if they could accompany me there later. I did the exam, and I'm still under the influence of the eye drops, so it's been torture to write this text, but I need to tell you what I found. You won't believe it: TWO DIFFERENT EDITIONS OF SOFIA THE FIRST MAGAZINES! THOSE THAT ARE NO LONGER PRODUCED! IN FACT, SEVERAL COPIES OF THEM! There were like, 7 magazines from the same edition, perfectly new, never touched, ON THE FLOOR. (And no, I'm not from Rio De Janeiro, there are a lot of sidewalks with this pattern here in Brazil)

A while ago, I think it was in January, I was wondering if I should also go to this city and look for Sofia The First merch, because in my small town I've already looked at all the stores and there's nothing left to see here (how many, about 4 ? 5? Yes, it really is a small city, I know all these places and you can visit them all in 1 or 2 hours at most, walking down the street, without a car). I found some stickers and birthday invitations, I posted them a while ago, I used them for journaling in my sketchbook.

(@shychick-52 do you see the Donald Duck magazines there?? When I saw them I immediately thought about you, they're on the bottom left of the pic and there's more in the top right. Pato Donald is Donald Duck, Tio Patinhas is Scrooge McDuck's name in Brazil. I don't know a thing about Ducktales, I'm sorry!)

I literally gasped. I was just going there for fun, as I like books, magazines and vintage products like records and CDs, so I really like physical media. Those places full of trinkets are extremely fun for me, and whenever I have the opportunity I like to look at everything, down to the smallest details. I love music and vinyl stores, stationery stores, party stores, haberdashery, so a magazine stand sounds amazing to me too! I hadn't been to one in years! (I never went thrifting in my life. It would be an amazing day to spend an evening)

There weren't only Sofia The First ones, you see, these kinds of magazines aren't produced anymore since kids don't have any interest in them. So most of the children's magazines there were dated around 2012-2016! You don't even have to look for the dates to know that, the Strawberry Shortcake ones, Frozen (FROZEN, DUDE! FROZEN!!!) (In one of my STF magazines there's even an ad of these Frozen magazines, they were produced during the same time), there were Disney Junior ones (If you look closely you can see the Lion Guard cover on that pic where I show you the pile of STF magazines, it's on top of them), Disney Princess, EVEN MONSTER HIGH. I didn't took a pic of this one, but as far as I know, you don't find these anywhere anymore. I felt like going back to 2015, when I was a kid those activity magazines and visiting the magazine stands were extremely fun, the themes on the children's magazines were exactly these, I remember the sticker albums, so many good memories. It makes sense, since they're the same ones, but they were never sold.

Besides the children magazines, they sell mangas, magazines, books, word search and activity books, cooking books, comic books/magazines (superhero themed or not- DC comics, Marvel, but also Disney and national works, for example our beloved Turma Da Mônica), and even toys and stuff.

So I figured maybe I'd find silly things here too, it's a bigger town but after all it's still small, it's just 40 mins away from mine, maybe I could find little birthday hats that I can cut out? Gift bags? Maybe stickers and coloring kits, silly things. Of course, knowing about the magazine stands there, something that my hometown NO LONGER has, inside of me had a small amount of hope that I could find something, but not much, as I live in the rural/interior part of Brazil and many products are bootleg, you know those princess books with wonky faces written "princess coloring book"? Stuff like that. But there was still a shred of hope, despite knowing that there probably wouldn't be anything interesting. I just went there because I have fun searching for little things.

AND WHEN I GOT THERE.... THE MAGAZINES WERE JUST THERE. AT THE ENTRANCE. ON THE ?!?!?!?!? FLOOR?!??!??! (You can see the pic up there) ON THE DIRTY SIDEWALK FULL OF DIRT AND DUST AND ALL KINDS OF NASTY THINGS?!??! HELL NAH

It was like they were just waiting for me to get them, they were the first things that I saw. I KNEW THAT I WOULD FIND SOMETHING. In fact, as I always hope to find cool things in these stores I frequent, I always expect something. I'm usually disappointed, but I always try to find it. AND THIS TIME I FOUND IT. NOT ONE, NOT TWO, BUT LIKE A DOZEN of STF magazines from the same edition, still packaged AND WITH THE GIFT. ALL OF THEM.

As my parents had work to do in our town and needed to return, I had to look at everything quickly. Luckily the magazine stand was small, so I was able to look at a few things, and while the attendant (who seemed bored (thankfully, the fact that she was very slow gave me time to look a little more)) served other customers (she was slow with them too, which gave me more time thank god), I continued looking at all sides of the stand, observing every small detail to look for treasures. If there were several copies of an issue of Sofia The First magazine still packed there, then there must have been more, hidden behind that enormous amount of information. I didn't had enough time because my parents needed to go back home, but I wish I could have saw the content from the Disney Junior magazines. I opened it and looked through the pages, only the last two pages were about Sofia The First, but I still had a lot to look so I put it back and went to search for more.

That's the one I got, the edition I mentioned

12 brazillian reais are worth around 2,50 dollars. For us, in talks about value, it would be like- 5 dollars? Not too cheap like literal 2 dollars, it's like, a cheap price, but not that much. For us, I mean. I don't know if you get what I mean, my explanation was terrible

Before, as we were late for the exam and the whole family was going (we all went to take the exam) I only took with me my cellphone and headphones, I didn't bring my money or even a purse or a backpack. My father bought me the magazine, I got so happy. Actually, he just let me have it and gave me the money, so I went to the attendant. The magazines had an elastic band around to secure them, as you can see in the pic, and I took them to the girl and asked for her help to get one out. As I'm used to being very friendly, and I was very happy, I approached the girl, asked for her help, and as she got them out of the elastic band, I kept talking "I can't believe I found this!! They are no longer produced, they are rare items, and I'm collecting them! I didn't think I would find anything like this here, it definitely made my day." I noticed that the attendant wasn't very friendly back, in fact she was very quiet and seemed a little bored, but I didn't care, I was too happy to worry about judgement looks from people I don't know, at least I was friendly and I did my part. My young brother later told me that when I turned my back she looked confused and shrugged, perhaps thinking "to each their own, right?". She went to serve the other customers and in the meantime I continued to look through the magazines, hoping to find more.

Important detail: I still had eye drops, my pupils were extremely dilated and I could see nearby objects blurred, so searching thoroughly was very difficult. Imagine looking at all that information without being able to see things closer than 1m from you. I'm still convinced I didn't manage to look at everything. I found more Disney Princess magazines (dated in 2014? 2015? somewhere around that) and that's when I saw it. I literally had to crouch down to look at the magazines in the lower sections of the shelf, they were stacked and they covered each other, and when I saw the Sofia The First logo I quickly grabbed it. IT WAS ANOTHER EDITION - A FLOATING PALACE THEMED ONE. Unfortunately this time it was out of the packaging, and I have no idea if someday there was even a gift with it, but I don't care, it was amazing to find this.

That's the Disney Princess magazines I was talking about! In that first pic I took, at the start of the post, you can see a Belle themed one. The Ariel themed magazine looks so old that the paint is stained and started to fade (it was in the front showcase while the other ones were carefully placed inside the stand), thankfully the STF ones were brand new. Well, almost.

Now that I'm home and I'm already seeing a little better, I'm gonna show you the magazines. Not all of them unfortunately, because a post only supports 10 pics and each magazine has 15/20+ pages so like... yeah. I wanna scan them and put them in a Google drive folder, or at least post a video about them in my YouTube channel, but that's more unlikely. If I had all of them, definitely, but I don't think it's worth recording a video if it's not with all the issues, don't you think? Anyway.

What's written in the first one: The Queen's Birthday Party! (This one came with the necklace)

In the second one: Sofia's vacation!

Let's take a closer look at the necklace

I'm fighting the urge to use it. I really want to use that tag in my sketchbook and the charm of the necklace in something like a keychain, but I cann'ttt bring myself to destroy something that is not produced anymoreeee😭😭😭

In the Floating Palace magazine, there is not even a single page where the sea monster is in. Not even a single one.

But in the "Queen's Birthday Party" one, there are three pages where Cedric is in! Yayy!!! They did him justice!!!

If anyone's curious about Miranda's birthday party, it's a comic and someone already posted it on Tumblr. Here is the link.

You know, that "Queen's Birthday Party" it's very exclusive, I don't remember the show having any episode like this, and the next activities in the magazine talk about the vacation they did in the comic and also the birthday party. Besides that, we have a lot of activities related to Tilly and family, and the main arts and crafts activity from this magazine is making a family tree. I believe that this magazine's topic is family.

I can't show you all the pages, but at least I can publish the pages Cedric is in and add more stuff to my Cedric merch masterlist (and personal research)

Well at least he's there. I have seen this art around like 20 times but they remembered that Cedric is a Sofia The First character so that's good I guess

They did him dirty here

AND THIS!!!! THIS ABSOLUTELY THIS!!! MY FAVORITE ONE!!!1!1!!!1!1!!1

YOU GUYS DON'T KNOW HOW LOUD I GASPED, WHEN I TELL YOU THAT I ALMOST STARTED JUMPING AND SCREAMING "YIPEE YIPEEE"

I'll translate it to you this time, so you can understand how I'm feeling right now

✨️Translation:✨️

Enchancia Castle

Title: Fraternal Bonds

Before leaving, Aunt Tilly gives her brother a big hug. Which pairs of siblings do you know from Sofia's world? Mark the correct pairs below.

THAT IS SO AAARRRGGGAGGAGAVVSGGSBBAVSGJ💖💖😭💗💞💗💞😭💞😭💗😭💞😭💖💗💖

I KNOW THAT CEDRIC AND SOFIA ARE THE WRONG OPTION, BUT I CAN'T. THAT IS SO CUTE I MIGHT EXPLODE I DON'T KNOW

that's what we had for today, I reached the 10 image per blog limit as always, no one's surprised

[ad-hawkeye]

wanted to know if you ever got to read artem’s pool/8 ball card i thought the event story was cute but i was a wee bit curious on your thoughts on the card

I JUST FINISHED IT!!!!!!!!! AS WE SPEAK!!! i have a whole list of my thoughts HAHA SORRY FOR THE RAMBLING IN ADVANCE

"artem had to join a pool club for work" is one of the better excuses to give him a new hobby, ill begrudgingly give them that

im glad artem still has the alcohol tolerance of a squirrel. do NOT let this man go off by himself he will accidentally take a sip of alcohol and then need a time out in the corner.

"is it that obvious?" yes, artem.

mc making sure artem eats a fucking meal is rly cute LMFAO

mc ordering artem a non-alcoholic drink is also sweet. i remember i wrote a fic (all the way back in like 2021 after reading atmospherics) where i wrote abt artem going out of his way to drink mocktails after all of that. genuinely really happy to see that's canon.

i've noticed newer ssrs are just. shorter? first year ssrs tended to be like, over an hour long when put on auto. but newer ones are only 40 mins on auto. laaaame. but then again with the overall writing quality, maybe they're just putting us out of our misery.

ah yes. artem getting surprised by mc kissing his cheek in public. what a sly sex chad. did they get the only good artem writer left at hoyoverse on this card or something

artem being exhausted from socializing is a mood. girl same.

the way these two talk about alcohol sends me. dear god artem we can let you have a sip oh god. OH JESUS CHRIST ARTEM NO --

this story is cute enough to make me sad. godddd. it's really nice to see artem more casual and open, esp since this story is more in character.

THE IRISH GOODBYE?? ARTEM LMFAO.

mutuals meet me in the secret passage of the pool place

sneaking out by running is giving the same energy as his revisiting youth ssr where they decided to sneak to the school's roof and hide from the security guards lmfao. ah. the nostalgia.

AND this ssr acknowledges artem's love of movies?? YES

STOP KISSING IN THE STORAGE ROOM GUYS THE CINEMA STAFF IS GOING TO FIND YOU!!!!!!!!!!!! DEAR GOD

"this should be filmed in slow motion" LMFAO

JUMPSCARE. JUMPSACRE. NEW ARTEM EXPRESSION. JUMPSCARE. HOLY FUCK

i sincerely think a full on artem smile is all i ever wanted back in the day i cant believe i fucking got it in the POOL CARD OF ALL CARDS

"was something set up incorrectly?" "[artem pout] probably."

mc taking a pic of his stupid distracted expression is amazing and him getting blushy about it is even funnier

"was it too sour?" "yeah...."

thank god pathetic artem is back

nevermind he is licking her arm like a dog. tot's fascination with licking will never fail to amuse me. this is like when my dog licks my leg in the middle of the night

if one sip of alcohol fucks him up this bad i'd hate to see what happens when he's a few shots in. mr wing breaking it down sloppy style on the floor (not clickbait)

STOP LICKING EACH OTHER YOU FREAKS

i think artem should trip a few more times it's funny

this is the closest we've gotten to artem fessing up about atmospherics i can fucking taste it

NOOOO THEY FUMBLED IT. NO ATMOSPHERICS MENTION. ENDING IT ALL. GOD DAMN IT

i can forgive this bc the running joke of them missing scenes in a movie is back

all in all as far as post second anniversary cards go, this one wasn't bad at all and had a lot of cute moments. a few weird ones (which is to be expected at this point ig), but mostly cute!! it made me miss my fav artem cards but in a good way. siiigh ;_;;;

[imabee-oralizard]

This is pt.1 cause of word count.

Palaye concert 4/11/24

Mom and I woke up at 11:30am and started getting ready. Had to do moms hair so it took li her than planned. We left from the apartment at 3pm. Cause of the traffic it took almost 3 hours to drive and we got there at 5:40. Luckily vip hadn’t went yet. Once we all went in we got a signed poster and then waiting to take pictures. Mom got a picture on her phone and I got one on my Sony camera. Palayes friend dude Austin couldn’t figure out how to get to the camera on mom’s phone so I went over to get to the camera. Then he couldn’t figure out how to get my camera on so I turned it on. A lady photographer came over to take the photo on my camera since she knew more. As soon as I went to Palaye Emerson and Remington right away went ‘it’s great to see you’ and Emerson gave me a hug first, then Remington, and Sebastian. But they said that and hugged me like they remembered me. I also gave Remington the letter I’d written. I stuck my hand out and said ‘can I give you this’ while just like staring at him. He took it and said ‘of course’ then slid it into his pocket. It’s the one from the previous concert in September but I added to it and still gave it to him since I wanted to tell him how amazing he is. I stood in between Emerson and Remington for the photo and mom was in between Sebastian and Remington. We also got some of the Fever dream vinyls signed along with the Palaye cd’s and the bastards cd. Then during the concert mom added memory so we didn’t have to worry about photos. I was gonna take some with the Sony but it automatically has a red flash so i didn’t use it. During the concert though I made eye contact with Remington multiple times. He never came over to me to like reach out like he did other people though. But at one point we came over and stood onto the ledge table area that I was standing right next to! He was going to step onto it and I’d moved mom and is hoodies real quick so he had room also since they were black. Had bought them at the concert. They have the picture of Remington with a cigarette in his mouth and the ‘sextape’ over it. Good thing I moved it to because Remington was gonna step right by it and he’d hesitated for a second until I grabbed them. Then he stepped right in front of me! Literally right in front of me. I almost died. Then he went back to the stage after max a minute. Also Sebastian looked at us and the came over to our side of the stage and was posing right in front at the perfect angle so I got some photos of him that I’ll have to edit and they’ll be great. The venue was super small so we were super close to the stage. No hates or anything. Mom and I were in the second row. I couldn’t see Emerson like the whole time cause the angle. I could see him more than mom could but not much. At one point he got up and started playing the guitar but I couldn’t see him aside of the other guitarist being in front of him. I also told the guy to move so I could see Emerson. After that song he went back to the guitar. The last song they played was lonely I think. Got a picture of the set list at the start also. During the concert Remington came out to be there for the pit. He also climbed on top of people. Then he also hung upside down and then sung on the ceiling. I yelled to Emerson but he didn’t look over. He also didn’t answer much during the vip question and answer. Was told by someone that he was sick. They did say that they have a new album coming out in June and will be back over here this fall. After the concert we got some posters off the wall along with two guitar pics from the workers. Then we went outside and I got a picture with Remington and a signature on the sign. Also got the same with Sebastian. I know mom took bad photos. I also asked her to take a photo on my camera and she somehow got that blurry. I have no clue how because it’s hard for me to get it blurry. Sebastian heard her say it was blurry though and he said he’d retake the photo in second. We did but she just took it on her phone instead. Didn’t see Emerson sadly.

[biscuits-of-bagend]

Andy Murray - The Flowers We'll Remember

I made this playlist halfway through the week, in between victories one and two. It tells me the story of Andy Murray's career as I experienced it, through songs that mean a lot to me, which is to say it might not make much sense to anyone else! So I've included some explanations below.

The title is related to a passage from the Ali Smith novel 'Summer'. It's about a summer day that told the gods it wanted to last forever, which the gods found hilarious.

Halfway Right by Linkin Park - 'I scream at myself when there's nobody left to fight', representing my earliest memories of Andy Murray, which involved a lot of him screaming at himself.

Hard Times by Paramore - Losing to Federer and Nadal and later Djokovic, but jauntily. A young man's losses.

The Heart Never Lies by McFly - 2012 Wimbledon final on-court interview 🥺

Love Forty Down by Frank Turner - I know he was 40-0 up at the end of the Wimbledon final, but functionally going from 40-0 to 40-Adv is basically the same thing 😂

Hold On by Twin Atlantic - back injuries :/ still sort of felt like it would all work out okay though, at least that was my understanding of it I think.

Don't Stop Me Now by Queen - Davis Cup at the end of 2015 through to World Tour Finals at the end of 2016. A euphoric period (ignore any losses to Djokovic in grand slam finals, we don't need to talk about those), but hard to look back on without thinking about what was coming.

Airfield by Enter Shikari - The Hip. Queens 2017 & 2017 Wimbledon QF to Australian Open 2019 'retirement'.

Wetsuit by The Vaccines - so get a hip operation, come on, come on

Get Better by Frank Turner - Bursting back to life/resurfacing in Cincinnati 2019. Also makes me think of 2019 'Resurfacing' documentary even though that didn't come out until later in the year.

Walk by the Foo Fighters - omg I've just realised I was thinking of the US Open 2020 not 2019... welp, timey wimey I guess, insert your preferred moment of watching Andy figure out how to play with his new hip

Mountains by Biffy Clyro - Antwerp 2019

Getting Old Sucks (But Everybody's Doing It) by Bowling For Soup - Pandemic through to 2023, including the post 4am fightback from two sets to love down against Thanasi Kokkinakis (see pics below). Getting old does suck, but Andy was really good at it.

Forever's Not Enough by McFly - "I want to play forever" (Wimbledon 2024)

26 by Paramore - a sad quiet song about hope, ie the only thing I was holding onto during the first half of that match against Nishikori and Daniel, which, lest we forget, was horrible

The Last Song by McFly - from 5 match points down through to breaking back in the second set against the Americans. Just pure fucking magic ✨ (thank you Dan!) ~~Epilogue section~~

Growing Up Beside You by Paolo Nutini - Andy Murray may be 11 years older than me, but so many of my memories of watching him play are tied to memories of times in my life. For example, I watched the 2016 World Tour Finals semi-final against Raonic in my student union, and vaguely remember trying not to show how stressed I was. I'm currently the age he was when he won Wimbledon the first time, so that's not terrifying at all...

The Way I Loved You (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift - I do really like Jannik Sinner but this could sort of be read as an indirect towards him? Although tbf watching post-puke Sinner power through tournaments has been its own kind of awesome. Honestly though, I don't think anyone will ever make me feel as much of a "rollercoaster kind of rush" on a tennis court as Andy Murray did anyway, not even the stress of watching Grigor Dimitrov try to hold a lead ❤️

Wouldn't Change a Thing - I really really wouldn't, and I hope Andy feels the same. Well, I mean, he'd probably choose not to have a hip injury, but you know what I mean 😆

[preciadosbass]

30/7/24 [draft from yesterday, again]

woke up at 9 and didn’t end up going back to sleep because my parents kept on talking about how i couldn’t as my provision/keyworker’s coming round. i know i usually get sleep, even if it’s in small amounts, but i never feel like i do. i scrolled through a few pictures of patrick stump until i had breakfast. i honestly felt so exhausted today following how my sleep and eating is at the moment.

my provision [person i have to see instead of going to school] came round almost immediately after i got up so i got dressed listening to escape the fate and then i obviously have to see her. i was about to say good morning to boris on the driveway when she pulled up so i ran off into the living room and waited for her to come in. i think she could tell that i was not having it today so we just awkwardly played uno for an hour. it’s hard to explain stuff like this without sounding ungrateful, i know it’s better than being at school, AND i know it makes me sound stupid, but i’m so scared of her. i really don’t like having to see her.

after she left i went outside and cuddled boris. he was literally the most affectionate id ever seen him in the four years we’ve had him. he usually just goes back and forth and brushes his head on me but today he wouldn’t leave me alone [in the best way.] i took a few videos of him rolling around on the floor and being playful because he’s just too cute. after being out with him for around 35 minutes i went back inside and finished watching tv from yesterday.

my dad came into my room at some point with something behind his back and i assumed it was some weird ass bug because he does tend to hand me stuff like that a lot. i didn’t believe that whatever it was wasn’t alive so i looked away and he put it behind my pillow and walked out. turned out it was a FALL OUT BOY CD!!! he got a deal on ebay and thought he might aswell get me something he knew i like. i love him so much.

after talking to my dad about fall out boy i went back to my room and carried on watching tv. while doing so i made another collage [shown at the end]. i’m not entirely happy with it but i knew it’d be a little iffy as i don’t have anything too interesting to stick into my book. i also didn’t have enough receipts/stickers [etc] to finish it anyways, but at least i liked making it.

i watched tv up until 4 when started collecting pictures of chris drew and other people like that to print out sometime, and then at some point i went upstairs to play roblox with my sister as we haven’t had one to one time in ages — or time together whatsoever for that matter. we played pierce the veil obby, natural disaster and fashion famous. it was really nostalgic playing roblox again.

my phone battery got low so i went back downstairs to the driveway and cuddled boris for like 30/40 minutes. mum came back from shopping so i had a couple grapes and watched a few videos on roller coaster crashes. after that i went on a walk with my mum to this abandoned well i haven’t been to since like 2018. [couple of pics also at end, the rest are at my insta @//iloveechicheng]

when i got home i looked for boris at his favourite spot [perched under my dads car] and when he wasn’t there i momentarily freaked out and as i looked up i noticed him on the windowsill looking out at me from the kitchen?? he’s literally never sat on a windowsill, at least not to my knowledge.. it was so cute OMGG

at this point it was about 9:30 so i stayed awake for as long as i could until i had a 20 minute nap and then went up to my parents to ask them questions about boris because they were still awake [1am i think]. we didn’t argue as we were all just so tired. afterwards i went downstairs intending to have another 20 minute nap but i woke up at 2 so i rushed to say goodnight to boris before i fell asleep again.

* ignore how weird the collage looks, i had to blur out most of the stuff on the receipts

have a good day/night -_<

[thisisarcanereverie]

When the World Went to Shit (Chapter 6)

Joel Miller x FEM! Reader

A/N: this is a SPOILER WARNING, this contains spoilers from the series in general.

PLEASE READ:

It's come to my attention that I've taken moments where Joel showed his vulnerability and made it about "Doc" (AKA the Reader). I would like to explain this. I've noticed in the show that Joel doesn't show certain emotions in front of others, the more vulnerable ones like fear or sadness or grief. He's always had those moments either with people he trusts completely or alone. And while he trusts Doc, she is one of the people he's trying to protect. So he wants to seem strong and doesn't show her those vulnerable moments, at least, when he can help it. Also up until now everything has been entirely in Doc's POV. From now on half of the chapter will be in Doc's POV and the other Joel's, it will still be in second person POV, just more into what's going on with Joel as a character. also a slightly shorter chapter this time around.

WARNINGS: Canon level of violence, swears, Joel is sad, talks of grief, PTSD, brief mentions of gore, Eventual Smut, pining (on both ends), grumpy idiots in love, reader is in her late 30's to early to mid 40's. Major character deaths. DISCLAIMER NO CHARACTERS/GIFS/PICS USED ARE MINE.

Summary: 20 years later after the world went to shit you, Joel, and Tess have to take 14 year old Ellie to the Firefly base outside of Boston QZ. What was supposed to be a simple plan turned into something much more complicated.

Prev. Chapter

Joel drove for a few hours before finding a place to park the truck, he made sure that it was clear enough to drive through but deep within the woods for cover. People had sucked before outbreak day, but they only got worse after. Raiders, Fireflies, FEDRA bastards, all of them sucked in their own way. He wasn’t an exception either, and he accepted that. He killed who he needed to, and more times than he would like to admit, he took pleasure in it. To take the hurt that he held onto and take it out on someone else, that was one of the reasons Tess liked him. 

He gathered the sleeping bags from the truck, handing Ellie’s to her first, making sure she got Frank’s old one rather than Bill’s. He went to hand you yours when you shook your head. 

“I think I’m going to sleep in the truck tonight,” you said. 

“You don’t have to do that,” Joel said once again trying to hand you the other sleeping bag to no avail. He sighed a deep sigh as he saw that look in your eyes, the look he knew meant that you weren’t going to budge on this. “At least grab a blanket so you won’t freeze to death.” Joel doesn’t look at you as he says this, instead he carries the sleeping bag over and lays it down. He saw Ellie fiddle with a loose string of the sleeping bag, Sarah used to do the same-

Joel looked away before he could finish that thought. Instead he laid down inside the bag and groaned, he heard you say a silent goodnight to Ellie before closing the door to the truck. He watched it rock a little as you settled yourself in the backseat. Joel didn’t express it in too many words but he cared about you, he just didn’t have it in him to say it out loud. 

“Hey Joel?” Ellie whispered, grabbing his attention. 

“Yeah?” 

“Did we do the right thing?” Joel looked over at her, he could barely see her eyes looking at him, which he was thankful for. “Lying to Doc?” 

A deep sigh left him as he remembered the event that had only transpired a few hours ago, and the note that Ol’ Bill left behind tucked safely into his jacket pocket. 

“It’s not lyin’,” Joel reasoned, “it’s just not telling her the whole truth.”

“Are you telling me the whole truth?” Ellie asked, Joel looked away from her and turned his face to the star strewn sky instead, finding the stars easier to look at, at the current moment. 

“Sure,” He said. Turning over to lay on his right side, making sure he would still be able to hear her. Silence passed by between them but Joel couldn’t rest, not with Ellie tossing and turning every few minutes. He would no sooner close his eyes and she would turn, the fabric of the sleeping bag brushing along with her and would wake him up. 

“Ok,” Joel groaned as he sat up and turned to her, “What’s wrong?” 

“Those people that you and Doc talked about,” Ellie said, turning to him, “There’s no way they’d find us here right?” He was silent for a moment, unsure of what to say. While he was sure that they were well covered, nothing was ever for sure. 

“No one’s gonna find us.” Joel promised as he laid himself back down laying on his right side. Internally he was berating himself for making a promise he couldn’t keep, why did he do that? 

“Ok,” He heard Ellie say before he heard the rustle of her sleeping bag one final time before silence. 

Sleep evaded Joel, which wasn’t uncommon without the pills and hooch; however this time it was different. He had this nagging feeling, one that wouldn’t let him rest. He had promised Ellie that no one would find them, which is something he shouldn’t have done. Someone could, that was always a possibility and one you should always be ready for and the only way to do that was to stay up and keep watch. Joel inwardly groaned as he realized what he was going to have to do in order to stop that nagging feeling. He waited until he heard the soft snores coming from the brunette beside him and got up. A few cracks and pops could be heard as he stood from the ground, resisting the urge to cuss out loud he grabbed the gun and walked to the path they came in at and just stood there. He would watch for a few hours, just enough to reassure him that everything was fine before catching what sleep he could. 

At some point in his watch he began to recount what had happened over at Bill and Franks. You didn’t know it but Joel had followed you, he watched as you broke down. He had wanted to comfort you, put an arm around your shoulders and lie to you saying that everything was going to be ok. But the longer he looked at you the more he felt his throat close up and the distinct feeling of having the wind knocked out of him grew stronger until he had to look away from you. He went back to the front of the house and put his hands on his knees, trying to breath through that gut wrenching feeling. 

It was cruel, he thought. Back at the beginning, after he lost his daughter and you lost your mother you had been each other's rock. It wasn’t like he cried on your shoulder or the other way around, but you would just sit next to him; you wouldn’t try to speak to him or offer your condolences, you would just sit there. That had meant more than he could ever say. But when the time came around for him to comfort you…he just couldn’t do it, he didn’t know how to anymore. 

His eyes had wandered over to the truck without him noticing, he hoped you were warm in there and that you couldn’t see him. Couldn’t see how shook he really was about everything that had happened, or that he was staying up later than he should to keep a promise he shouldn’t have made. In the strangest sense, though, in the midst of grief and fear was the beginnings of some old, forgotten feeling. One he hadn’t had since the outbreak, something he would rather not dwell on for too long. 

As he watched the road ahead, careful of any noise or sudden movement of leaves in the darkness, he thought more about the past few days. A lot had happened, it was almost too much to process. He almost laughed as he thought about how easy this job was supposed to be, get the girl to the Firefly base outside of the QZ, get the supplies that were promised, then find Tommy. But since he’s accepted the job, he’s assaulted a FEDRA Officer (maybe killing him), found out that the girl wasn’t just a girl she could possibly be the only person immune to the Cordyceps, Tess getting bit and sacrificing herself to save them, Frank and Bill were dead and left him all their supplies along with some unsolicited advice on Bill’s part. The one thing in common is that in the past few days, three people that he cared for (whether he admitted it or not) have died. Sure, Bill and Frank had been dead before he got there but how was he supposed to know that?! It was just a lot to lose in such a short time frame. 

And what of you? 

You, that smart mouthed child who used to chide him and Tommy about smoking cigarettes, turned into one of the most important people in his life. You weren’t much younger than Tommy, just a year or two; and before the outbreak he hadn’t spoken to you in years, wouldn’t have been able to pick you out in a crowd or anything. Yet now, after all these years, if he closed his eyes and focused long enough he’d be able to pick out the sound of your breathing. And that scared him, now more than ever. He’s already lost Tess, he’s lost Sarah and he’s lost Tommy and Bill and Frank, how could he lose you? He didn’t know what he would do if he lost you too. He tried not to think about that, but with everything that had happened it was inevitable that his mind would wander there.

Joel didn’t know how long he stared down that empty path, waiting for something he knew wouldn’t come. But the next thing he knew the sky was lighter and the early morning mist began to rise and he was tired. The corners of his vision blurred from the lack of sleep, but it wasn’t something he couldn’t push through. Maybe he would have you drive today, get a little nap in the passenger seat before stopping to fuel up or siphon gas out of abandoned vehicles if you didn’t want to break into the gas cans quite yet. 

First things first though. 

Coffee. 

**************************************************************************

(Reader’s POV)

“Please!” the woman in front of you begs, a strand of her brown hair dangled in front of her eyes as you saw her tears fall, “don’t kill me here! I can’t die here, I have-” Your finger squeezed the trigger and the recoil was nothing to your body anymore. You watched as her body fell to the ground with a thud, the sound of the gunshot still echoed through the air as you silently said your apologies. She wasn’t the first person you’ve had to kill in order to survive, and she wouldn’t be the last. 

For a few weeks it was just You, Joel, and Tommy. But Tommy had always been fast to make friends, and soon all three of you were a part of a group. Apparently not everything was lost, the government was still active, or at least that’s what you’ve heard through them. They’ve set up Quarantine Zones, or QZ’s.  apparently they would have supplies, shelter, things that you needed and more. But it was a long walk from Texas to Boston, and you needed to do what you had to do to survive. Even if that meant killing people who had what you needed in order to do that. 

You were about to grab her bag when you saw the locket hanging around the woman’s neck. It wasn’t anything you needed, but curiosity got the better of you as it always did. You opened the silver locket to see not a picture but a single snippet of blonde hair, wordlessly you closed the locket with the hair inside and grabbed the bag before your conscious started to stir. 

The bag had seen better days, as did everything else, the bag was covered in dried dirt and one of the straps was only attached to the sack via duct tape. You looked inside and thanked god that she had at least four cans of food, That would be enough for you, Tommy, and Joel for tonight at least with one to spare. You dumped the cans into your own bag and tossed it aside, having no need for the bag when your own was in better condition at least. You got up and were about to leave when you looked over and saw a few flowers. 

Bluebonnets. 

They had been your mother’s favorite, she had always liked blue things. You knew you had to get back to the group, that they would probably be wondering where you were. But, for once, you ignored logic. You adjusted the body of the woman, adjusted her so that her necklace was under her shirt and close to her heart before you grabbed a few of those bluebonnets and surrounding flowers. Making a makeshift bouquet before placing it in her hands. You said a silent prayer before turning away. You didn’t know if she believed in a god and after all that had happened you couldn’t blame her, nor did you know which one she worshiped. So you kept it as vague as you possibly could and gave her what little of a funeral you could to make up for what you had to do. 

It was almost funny, how over the past month or so you had never felt so alone than in this moment. When you realize that the day someone you love dies isn’t the worst. 

It’s all the days that follow. 

You took a sharp inhale as you woke up, your heart beating faster than normal as you struggled to sit up. You cupped your hands over your eyes as you tried to remember to take deep breaths. You’ve done things that you weren’t proud of, that haunted you. You’ve made friends and held them in your arms as they died, there were people you couldn’t save, and you’ve killed people who were only doing what they could to survive. You let out a deep sigh as finally you feel your heart rate slow and the pounding in your head cease. 

“Hey,” you heard Joel say as he opened the truck door letting the cool early morning air into the truck causing goosebumps to form on your forearms, “I made some coffee if you want any.” It was funny, how tired you can see someone was by their eyes. The first thing you noticed was how the whites of his eyes were bloodshot, and how slow he was to blink, and the rings underneath his eyes were dark. If you had to guess, the poor man didn’t sleep last night. You weren’t sure if it was from nightmares or from something else, and you had to stop yourself from asking. It wasn’t your place, you may care for him, but his issues were his own and demons only he could fight. 

“Great,” you groaned as you stretched, pretending not to notice how tired he was, “I could use a cup,” you heard a few pops coming from your back as you raised your arms over your head only to let them down after a second. Relishing in the brief relief of constant uncomfortableness that your body was under most days.

“I, uh, I got us both thermoses before we left,” Joel said as he cleared his throat looking away, “I’ll just put your half in yours, just come out when you’re ready.” You watched as he walked off with that familiar slight stagger in his step. Not really understanding what that was about, you decided not to think more about it as you grabbed the blanket that you slept with last night. You haphazardly fold it before placing it on the passenger seat, where Joel was going to be once you’ve packed up camp. The door closed with a thud as you turned to see Ellie waking up, and wiggle her way over to where the bubbling of coffee was. You watch in amusement as you see her recoil and a look of utter disgust etches on her face as she opens the lid and smells the slightly burnt and roasted smell of coffee grounds. 

“What the fuck is that?!” 

You watch Joel, who was putting away his own sleeping bag in the trunk of the car, turn to her with a look that you could only describe as mild offense and surprise. 

“You don’t like coffee?” 

After a few more comments from Ellie about how disgusting coffee smelled and grunts from Joel. You all eventually got all the gear together and headed into the truck. Ellie took the back seat and while you assumed you were going to have to fight Joel on this, you were pleasantly surprised when no fight came from him as you opened the passenger seat for him and motioned for him to get inside. Only fight you got was about you opening the door for him, saying something along the lines about you hurting his southern gentleman pride. But that was quickly abandoned as the door closed and you went to get behind the driver's seat. 

After making sure you didn’t forget anything one more time, you started the engine and started to make your way to Wyoming once again.

TAGLIST:

faith-alons26

burninggracesandbridges

dorck26

issybee0611

lightninginab0ttle

@avengersfan25

[opinated-user]

To some of who may doubt about the accounts. Think about this. Which is easier to explain.

Of all those 2000+ images over a five year period. Some elaborate troll just, at best, 40-50 images a day picking the worst artists and pics imaginable. With just the right material, it looks convincing enough to be Lily. All while waiting for the account to be discovered. Sure that sounds like a plan, but then why have no activity and then the activity resumes?

Or…

Lily doing what lily does. Uses names/aliases that fall into her pattern makes an account and slowly fills it with stuff she gets off on. And like a republic with their porn, denies any of the sexual material that is in it. Wait for the chatter to die down and finally when it’s safe go back and get her rocks off again. And to make matters very interesting it’s filled with stuff she so vocally against. Anime characters from Dragon Maid, incest, Nazis. Gee it’s almost like Lily is doing all that screaming so that it covers up what she’s really into

i still have yet to see a single reason as to why those accounts couldn't be LO. i heard some "i don't know if those are hers", but i haven't even found one person who was able to argue why it couldn't be? it's because it's disgusting? all the tara chat logs are disgusting. all of stockholm was disgusting. everything she writes is gross and makes me feel ill the more i think about it. violate is the most egregious example of that and that turned out to be LO taking the trauma of Courtney to make it into her own. why do we keep acting as if LO has any limits? any moral? any decency left? why do we keep assuming that she'd be a good enough person to not enjoy that content, when everything she has done show that she's not like that?

[silverselfshippingchaos]

ashh have u ever talked abt ur yakuza s/i (thats the game series uve been posting recently right..) 🙇‍♀️ i would love to hear abt anything ud like to share

HAHAHA YES THANK YOU THAT WOULD BE THE ONE!

the question is... which s/i? I have more than 10, so... Let's go over them! Welcome to...

A Beginner's Guide to Every Yakuza Ash S/I!

(this will not include nanba and seonhee because idk my s/is yet. I'll include what game every character is from in case you're curious.)

(Mentions of parent death, child abuse, car crashes, violence, and some spoilers)

(Every single Yakuza game.)

Our favorite detective dad, Date, has a fellow detective for a partner. Ash is around 40 in Yakuza 1 and used to be his partner (in work, he was still with his ex-wife at the time). After a few years, Ash left the police and became a private investigator. She continues to do this, even when he goes back to the police.

Ash became a homicide detective to find the truth about why her parents were murdered. She did. She killed the man who did it.

These days, though, she's a fun side character who's pretty much your typical detective and often talks about work. She's very thoughtful and almost always analyzing things, but she's sorta got some major trust issues to work through... Might be my favorite S/I. She never hesitates to get her hands dirty and has quite a few shady connections around town.

She falls in love with Date AFTER his divorce and is on good terms with his ex and his daughter from his marriage. They get married around Y3-Y4. Like Date, she's in her late 50s by the current games.

She always wears a red coat and has in every single appearance of hers. It's a running gag that she has everything in her coat. First Aid Kit? Jumbo Bunchan Plushie? A gun? A whole bottle of beer? Whatever you need, Ash probably has it in her coat.

(Every Yakuza game)

Kiryuuuu! Kiryu Ash is a bartender (age 21) in Y0 and the two of them get together a few years after the game. They are dating in Y1 and continue to date throughout the series.

Ash does drop the bartender gig after a few games, but she's always by Kiryu's side. She's very loyal, and loves nothing more than a street fight. She loves getting her hands dirty and has so much fun. No wonder she gets along with the Dragon of Dojima!

She's a very strong fighter, and goes with Kiryu to the orphanage. That's about it. I don't like her very much LMAO I have cooler S/Is!

I wouldn't be surprised if the later games have the two of them on not-so-great terms. Ash has been a constant in the series and is Kiryu's most loyal companion, even when he's a stupid idiot. Ash is nice! Very nice!

(Yakuza 4)

KIDOOOOOO! Kido time! Another character tells him to go balls out (Kido was feeling a little unsure about doing something) and it turned into a meme. That's the tag.

Kido's Ash is... as normal as it gets. She's in her early-mid 20s. She's just your average nerdy civilian. However, she's very funny. Why, you ask? It's because she's OBSESSED with Bunchan plushies! As am I. This is a real screenshot of mine from Judgment.

She has Bunchan eveeryythiinnggg, and their first meeting is outside of an arcade because Ash wanted to win them from the claw machine. Kido won it for her. They fall in love. Happy story. That's it. Yup. That's Kido Ash. She has a Bunchan lanyard sticking out of her jacket. She's a Bunchan freak.

(From Judgment and Lost Judgment, a spinoff series that you should totally check out.)

SUGIURAAAA! Masked pic. I post him so often that I think everyone knows what he looks like though LMAAAOO.

Ash was a fellow masked thief. Ash is 24-26ish (based on the game). She was called Rose. Her mask was a crying face with a rhinestone tear. I have waist length hair, but Ash tucks her hair in a beanie to make it look short.

They develop feelings for each other as Jester and Rose. Eventually, they reveal faces and just fall in love more. He sees what Ash's hair actually is and he loves it.

Ash is young, funny, and an amusing side character that's good at picking locks and parkour. She's nice.

(Yakuza 3)

MINEEEEE! Our favorite billionaire asshole, slapper of orphans, bulldozer of orphanages, stabber of- Okay I'm not helping his case...

Okay! Ash is a fellow billionaire asshole and she runs her own company. She's in her mid 30s. She's a rich asshole who wears nice suits and drives fancy cars. They knew each other briefly as children.

Her parents died in a car crash, and she was taken in by her grandparents. They treated her like shit. Anyways, now she's rich as fuck and lives on her own. Life is good.

The two of them reconnect as adults and Ash prevents him from doing what he does at the end because he's ALIVE AND HAPPY AND ALIVE AND NOT DEAD AND-

Polyship time!

There's a game called Ishin where all the Yakuza characters play historical figures and shit, so here's Ryoma and Hijikata! They look and sound like Kiryu and Mine. Ash is in her late 20s.

Ash is someone who ended up in Japan against her own will. I won't go into the details because they're horrifying, but to put it simply, she got stashed into a boat and now this is her life.

She wears a mask and kills anyone who comes too close, disguising herself as a man. Shit happens, and she ends up crossing blades with two Shinsengumi captains.

Ryoma grows close with her first, and falls for her. Once they date, Hijikata falls for her too. I've talked about them a lot on this blog. They live a peaceful life and raise chickens on their farm together.

And that's more or less it!

That's the simple, most bare bones guide to most Ashs.

There's also Kurohyou Ash, but I'm still writing her. She's in her mid-late 20s.

(Kurohyou is a spinoff that was never released in the west :()

She's an arms dealer who has a bit of an obsession with knives, women, and being an asshole. No wonder she falls for Ryusho, who also loves women- They're both flirty jackasses who never shut up about how much sex they have, but... End up being a really cute couple?!??! No more details though since I haven't played his game yet. She lovessss knives.

There's also Hanawa Ash. I have a crush on him but haven't met him yet.

(From The Man Who Erased His Name, a Kiryu side game that takes place between Y7 and Y8)

Ash's husband died the day of their wedding. She devoted herself to learning how to kill in hopes of their revenge. Ash is now in her lateish 40s, maybe even 50s. She's got some gray. Whatever, she's around his age and that's what's important.

It doesn't go well. After a near brush with death, Ash gives up her old names, gets some cosmetic surgery, and becomes, well... Ash. An agent. An assassin. That's how they meet.

I'll make a separate post about her sometime! Even if I don't fall for him when I play his game, I love what I have written for him.

Phew.

I'm tired now. I'm gonna go eat a cookie..