#i still don’t Love it bc it makes the world feel super small. but i wouldn’t hate it as much l

[mabaris]

ok honestly though. i will be less dismayed about the whole “the ancient elves were actually behind all of the folklore across thedas” if it turns out the ancient elves ALSO have their own mythology. because the thing i object to is “here is an objective answer to everything interesting about the universe” but i think “the people who became your gods had their own gods” would avoid that. “answers” that in turn just invite more questions. it’s not that they invented the universe, they just shaped the way the world is right now

[sagigirlie]

Astro observations pt.6

Venus-Jupiter Can be pretty Lucky, attracts wealth, positive and socially magnetic, usually well liked, charismatic. can be promiscuous as they like to try and experience and love to be loved, good sense of humor, adventures, loves food and the good things in life. can be addicted/obsess or overdo things that make them feel good like food, sex, shopping, partying and drinking/ doing drugs.

Venus-Neptune- very dreamy . Likely to have a crush on tv/movie characters. Very giving in love. Be Careful not to be taken advantage of bc of that.

Virgo placements- super professionals. Great workers. Good work ethic. workaholics. Somehow always gives fox-like look or the ones to look like an animal the most for some reason haha

It’s true, cancer placements (especially sun moon & ascendant) in girls gives round big boobs lol. I noticed cancer sun/moon/rising females also tend to have skinnier (& sometimes longer) legs & wider stomach with big boobs and roundish face or fuller cheeks. *(note: I’ve noticed if cancer females don’t have beautiful round boobs they’ll have very small boobs. No in-between- no shade here though haha)

Cancer placements in men are usually tender, cute & sweet and have a vulnerability about them that provokes the mom instincts in female lmao. Might want u to mommy them. But don’t get them mad cause they might not be as innocent as they may look. Likes more feminine girls in looks & behavior. Also they’ll usually be good at handling ur emotions and make u feel accepted & understood. Might like more emotionally complexed partners. Can be attracted to deepness & vulnerability as well.

Aquarius sun man and capricorn sun females will likely attract each other but not workout in the long haul. Marriage will be harder to manage for these two for some reason from what I’ve seen. I think it’s cause Aquarius are more flighty and living in their own world and fantasies, they might even be delusional at times as their more idealistic and are not the most manly as the Capricorn female looks for a more hard working grounded stable and realistic man for most.

Virgo females can be serous bullies & mean girls when they want. There. I said it. (Although they might look innocent).

Leo-cancer influence in a chart can make you want lots of attention and especially emotional attention & they are the more likely to use manipulation and deceit to get what they want. Leo-libra are more likely to want physical attention (also about their looks). they’ll do it mostly by trying to look fire lol.

Aries moon females are psychotic u can’t tell me otherwise lol. Talked about it before but they can be very very selfish, jealous and paranoid and/or self absorbed. Seen it time after time. Can have a very bad tamper and be rude and impulsive when upset or when something doesn’t go the way they want. Can be bossy & demanding. Can literally black out when mad. They can’t control it.

Pisces females might have a thing with girls tryna steal their man ? Not sure but seen it a few times. Or they’ll try to steal your man. Especially Pisces & Aries influence in a chart together. They can be attracted to unavailable or taken man. Seen it happen a lot. Careful cause some of them won’t stop at a red light. They can go after your man still. Maybe it’s hot to them ? Or makes them feel better about themselves especially with the competitive Aries influence and the unavailability that Pisces can be attracted to.

Aquarius mars can really be attracted (sexually or not) to individualism and uniqueness in people. More than looks that’s what will drive them to u. Just watched drake say that and he’s an Aqua mars (like me). The more real and different u are the better (but not too crazy lol). You need to pop outta the crowd for them to notice u more. They can like cool calm & collected people that have a cynical/clever or different sense of humor. The ones that won’t necessarily try to shine (unlike Leo’s- the opposite of aqua). Maybe even the more loner type vibes. Sexy mysterious guy/girl in the corner that sticks out without trying. They themselves can be that person too haha. love funny & intelligent people that can hold a conversation.

I feel like Aquarius & scorpio in a chart can give vampire vibes to a person (maybe looks or energy). Also they might like all that vampire shit like twilight or vampire diaries haha (me lmao). (Also Ian somerholder has that combo)

Capricorn venus can be very insecure. They need to learn to love and accept themselves truly. Stop self-sabotaging urself and/or ur relationships.

[causenessus]

Nightmares. | Bungou Stray Dogs

inc: dazai, chuuya, tecchou

written in 2nd pov (female reader implied at least for chuuya)

song recc: roslyn by bon iver

word count: 1064 words

summary: "how do they take care of you when you have a nightmare?"

sorry if they all seem the same D: i tried to make them all unique and i can see the difference between each character in how they would treat u but i know it's small i'm sorry they're all just such green flags and would be the sweetest <3

dazai

has had so many nightmares himself he knows just how to take care of you

having someone with him at night helped reduce the stress and the number of ones he has <3

you’ll wake up from a nightmare, crying out as you shoot up and he’s there for you from the very start, sitting up as well and shushing you, pulling you to his chest

“it’s okay, it’s okay,” he kept repeating as he drew your head near to his chest. “deep breaths, bella,” he encouraged softly, holding your face so that you were looking directly into his eyes while he gave you a gentle smile. he ran his hands through your hair, smoothing it out until your breathing calmed down

is super patient with you throughout the whole process, will not act sleepy in the slightest so that you don’t feel bad for waking him up or anything else

“ ‘m sorry I woke you,” your voice shook as you tried to take a deep breath, wiping the tears away from your eyes.

he took your hands off your face, using his own to brush away your tears with all the care in the world. “don’t be sorry, I was half awake anyway. take your time, love.”

he’ll offer to listen if you want to talk about it, but he understands if you’re not ready yet

tries to coax you back to sleep soon after because he wants you to rest

but he knows from experience how hard it can be when your mind is racing

the reason it’s helped him so much to sleep with someone though is bc it can take your mind off the dream <3

he’ll position you against his chest and between his legs while he rests against the headboard of the bed. he’ll intertwine his arms with yours, rubbing circles on your wrists while he hums softly to distract you

if you’re feeling sensitive to noise, he’ll place his hands over your ears instead, using his thumbs to rub the sides of your head

he’s there for whatever you need him to do. during your first nightmare with him, he’ll still be figuring out how you react to them. after that, he'll remember exactly what you need and want from him. he wants to make sure you feel safe and comfortable no matter what <3

chuuya

wakes up first while you’re still tossing and turning in your dream

he’ll sit up and lean over, waking you as gently as he can. he’ll cup your face as you wake up, brushing anyway any tears with warm hands

“hey, hey, it’s okay. you’re okay. it’s just a bad dream. I’m right here. you’re safe,” he whispered softly as you woke up shaking, your breathing erratic

he kisses away the rest of your tears, touching you so gently and with so much love

asks if you want to talk about it and if you need anything else which he’ll be happy to get for you

afterward, he’ll pull you close to his chest, one hand on your head and the other around your waist, making you feel secure and protected

I think he’d be the type who would keep talking the whole time, distracting you from your thoughts. he’ll talk you through everything he’s doing, he’ll continue to comfort you, and will talk about any other random thing once you both have laid back down

probably tries to make some jokes a little bit before you head back to sleep as well to make you feel better

“sometimes, that stupid dazai shows up in my dreams and I just know it’s not a coincidence. there’s no way that scheming blockhead doesn’t have some mysterious way of communicating and entering people’s dreams. and he does it just to piss me off. ugh, just thinking about it makes me upset,” he ran a hand through his hair, smiling when you let out a small laugh, wiping away the last of your tears with the back of your hand.

he took your hand in his own and kissed it softly, “there’s my pretty girl. see? you’re safe, nothing bad is gonna happen.”

tecchou

does not wake up

you wake up from your nightmare, eyes bleary and heart racing. the only thing you want is to be in his arms so you wake him

once he sees your tears though he’s up immediately, hands on your face as he wipes them away, “oh angel, what’s wrong?”

you place your hand over his own, “just a nightmare…I’m sorry I didn’t know what else to do.”

“nothing to be sorry about,” he says softly, a smile on his face as if you had said something funny, “that’s what I’m here for. I’m glad you woke me up.”

he suggests making a warm drink to calm you down if you’re up for it 

in his experiences, he’s found it best to get up and change his surroundings in order to get his mind off a bad dream

if you say yes, he’ll make you something to drink before sitting next to you in the kitchen. he’ll be with you the whole time, telling you that he’s willing to listen if you want to talk about it or anything else if you don’t want to think about it

will have a hand on your thigh or back, rubbing it slowly to comfort you

when you both head back to bed, he’ll hold you close to him, one hand intertwined with yours to let you know he’s there while the other runs through your hair <3

if you don’t want to get up from the bed, that’s okay too, he’ll ask you what you want him to do and makes sure your every need is taken care of <3

kisses your forehead as you both lay back down, then draws patterns across your skin with one hand. the other one flat against your lower back to keep you pressed against him

if you’re still a little scared, he’ll continue to comfort you and reassure you that it’s okay. he’ll wipe away any more tears and stay awake the whole time. he tries to make sure he hears your breathing slow and that you’ve fallen back asleep before he closes his own eyes again to make sure that you get the rest you deserve <3

[riordanness]

bad blood - [h.haddock]

8.2K wordcount

warnings: death mention, panic attack mentions

requested: no

a/n: i usually don’t do author’s notes on my fics bc i don’t think i have really anything to say lmao. however. i wanted to say a quick word about this one, as it’s a kind of old piece but one i was extremely proud of and worked really hard to complete. i loved the humorous parts i wrote, loved the character arc i gave y/n, and just in general really liked how my writing turned out. also, it’s the second longest one-shot (currently) i’ve ever written! anyways, enjoy my lovelies <3

I disliked Hiccup Haddock more than anything else in the entire world. I didn’t like him at all for a very long time, but… well, here is our story.

“Hey love.” A voice appeared next to my shoulder, and I rolled my eyes.

“Go away, Hiccup,” I demanded, refusing to look at him. I was carving a spear out of a wooden stick, so I kept my focus on my knife running back and forth along the wood.

Even without looking at him, I could tell he had a smirk on his face. “Oh love,” he whined. “I want to talk to you.”

He tugged on one of my small braids that ran down the sides of my hair. I whacked his hand away, still not looking at him. “I said go away,” I said again.

He laughed. “I know.”

“So leave me alone.”

A moment’s pause. “But why?”

“Because I hate you and don’t want you around, annoying me to death. I’m busy.”

“But you’re fun to annoy.”

I turned on him, fiercely glaring up at him. The worst thing about Hiccup was how tall he was compared to me. He wasn’t even that tall, I was just super short. Hiccup was a full head higher than me.

Hiccup had a smirk playing around his mouth. “Hey shortcake.”

I hit him. “Shut up, Hiccup.”

“Aww, c’mon sweetheart. I’m bored.”

“That’s nice.” I crossed my arms protectively. Not that Hiccup would ever actually hurt me. Honestly, if it came down to me being in danger, I was pretty sure he’d defend me. I’d known him longer than anybody else I knew.

I might hate him, but it was the truth. Hiccup was an asshole, but I knew deep down he didn’t absolutely hate me. I guess I didn’t hate him, either. He was just a total pain.

“Go ride Toothless or make a friend or do something. Just leave me alone. I don’t care to see you.”

Hiccup sighed, running a hand through his ruffled brown hair. His green eyes flickered with amusement. “Okay, love. I’ll see you later.”

“Don’t call me that.”

He winked. “Sorry love.”

I resisted the childish urge to stamp my foot. “Hiccup!”

He held up his hands. “Okay… okay.” I almost thought he might actually be genuine, until he smirked. “I’ll stop calling you love… darling.”

I knew there was no shutting him up. I turned on my heel without a word, and stamped angrily into my cabin, slamming the door behind me.

Three seconds passed, then there was a knock on the door. I opened it. “Hiccup, go away!”

Hiccup stood there, grinning mischievously. “Fine, fine. Bye, you.”

I rolled my eyes and shut the door. I’d only just turned around when another knock sounded. I gritted my teeth. “Stupid little —“

I opened the door again and stopped short. “Oh! Stoick. Um, hi.” I swallowed. “Sorry, I, uh, I thought you were Hiccup.”

Stoick looked amused. “That’s alright, y/n.”

“Um, would you like to come in?” I offered.

Stoick nodded, and stepped inside. I suddenly felt very conscious of how messy the place was. I didn’t spend much time here, preferring to roam outside or stay at Astrid, my best friend’s house.

“How are you faring up?” Stoick asked.

I shrugged. “I’m okay. Still getting used to the fact that they’re gone, but, you know. It’s okay. I’m okay.”

Stoick nodded. “If you ever need anything, feel free to let me or Hiccup know.”

I groaned internally. “Yeah, like I’d ever ask him for help,” I muttered.

I hadn’t intended for him to hear, but Stoick chuckled softly. “He doesn’t hate you, you know.”

“Sure,” I said. “Because he thinks I’m fun to annoy.”

“That’s not it.”

I waited, but he didn’t elaborate. “O…kay…” I said slowly. “Um. Great. Well, it’s getting late, so if you don’t mind, uh…”

“Oh! Sure, sure,” Stoick said. “Have a good night, y/n.”

A long time after he left, I stood in my empty, cold house, staring at the door, wishing for something to come and fill the hole that was forming inside of me.

“Y/n, did you hear?”

I turned to my best friend. “Um. No. What happened?”

Astrid brushed her hair out of her eyes. “Stoick just told Hiccup he’s going to become chief soon.”

“Cool.” I returned to making the leather straps I’d been softening for my future dragon’s saddle.

See, the thing is, I don’t have a dragon. I know, that’s so weird, everyone in Berk has one, but I’m, well… a dragon killed my parents a few years ago. I’ve never liked them anyways, but after that, I’ve struggled a lot with my feelings about dragons. I’m sure one day I will overcome this fear inside me and own a dragon, but right now? No way.

“That’s all?” Astrid looked offended. “Y/n, that’s so much cooler than cool.” She suddenly laughed. “You know what this means?”

I frowned a little. “No..?”

“Hiccup has to choose a bride.”

I blinked. “Really? Um, so?”

Astrid rolled her eyes, elbowing me as she sat beside me on the ground. “You know you’re in love with him, y/n/n.”

I pretended to gag. “Ugh, as if! Astrid, you know I hate him. I don’t care at all about him in any way, especially not in a romantic way. I don’t care a single little bit if he has to choose a bride.”

“Sure.” Astrid smirked. “You’re secretly hoping he’ll choose you, aren’t you?”

I shot her a glare that warned her to shut up. “He’ll choose you and you know it,” I said.

Astrid wrinkled her nose. “I doubt it,” she said. “Hiccup and I literally never talk. Besides, everybody knows that me and Stormfly are a forever couple.”

I shook my head at her, but I had to smile. “Well, he won’t choose me, and I don’t care about it anyway.”

Astrid looked like she wanted to argue, but she shut her mouth when she noticed someone walking over to us. When I saw who it was, I sighed.

“What do you want?” I demanded.

“Gee, you’re lovely today, darling,” Hiccup teased, plopping himself down next to us.

“Excuse me,” I pointed out. “We didn’t invite you to sit with us.”

Astrid glanced at me, a smirk playing around her mouth. Her eyes were twinkling. I glared at her. I hate you, I mouthed.

I swung one leg over the log so my back was to Hiccup. “So, Astrid,” I said, a little too loudly. “What do you want to do this afternoon?”

“I’m taking Stormfly out for a ride,” Astrid replied. “You’re welcome to join —“

“No,” I said instantly. “Uh, I mean. No thank you. I’m good.” My hands trembled ever so slightly. I coughed, swallowed, and picked up my leather strap, gripping it tightly to stop the shaking.

Hiccup poked his head over my shoulder. “You know—“

I elbowed him in the ribs so hard he tumbled off the log. “Whoa!” he yelped. “Jeez, y/n!”

“Sorry,” I apologised. “I- you startled me.”

Hiccup rolled his eyes. “No I didn’t. You just like hitting people.”

My mouth tightened. “No I don’t. And stop calling me a liar!”

“When did I call you a liar?” He got to his feet, one arm cradling his ribcage. “You’re violent for literally no reason.”

I glared at him. “You just said I was lying. And I didn’t even hit you that hard.”

Hiccup winced. “Uh- yeah you actually did. I think you broke a rib or something.”

I slammed my work to the ground, getting to my feet and facing the boy. “Stop avoiding the fact that you called me a liar! I never ever ever make up anything.”

My eyes glittered with unwanted tears. Involuntary memories sprang into my mind. My parents hugging me. My father’s voice in my hair, my younger voice begging them to promise to return soon. “Of course we will return, darling,” my father said. “We’ve never lied to you, have we now?”

I blinked, forcing the tears away. I hated crying in any situation, but I wouldn’t be able to stand crying in front of Hiccup. I’d never live it down.

“Whatever.” Hiccup glanced at me. His voice suddenly changed. “Want to see something amazing?”

“Yeah,” I grumbled. “The retreating back of your head would be great, thanks.”

Hiccup rolled his eyes. “I’m serious.”

“So am I!” I turned away from him, and only then did I realise Astrid was nowhere to be seen. She must’ve snuck away while Hiccup and I were arguing.

Hiccup’s hand grabbed my shoulder and spun me around. “C’mon,” he pleaded, and his voice sounded genuinely kind. “It’ll be fun.”

I rolled my eyes. “If I come with you, do you promise to leave me alone after?”

Hiccup nodded.

“Fine,” I muttered. “Where are we going?”

He grinned mischievously. “You’ll see.”

Hiccup turned, and I had no choice but to follow; partly because I was curious, and partly because I wanted him to leave me alone, and this was the only way to guarantee that.

We entered the woods that surrounded the village, and I began to get suspicious. “Hiccup?” I asked. “Where exactly are we going?”

He didn’t answer for almost a minute. “You’ll see.”

I rolled my eyes. “First, that’s not a proper answer. Two, don’t you think that you should tell me before you drag me off somewhere?”

He laughed. “C’mon. Don’t you ever do anything adventurous or risky?”

“Yes,” I answered. “I talk to you.”

“Hey!” He shot me a playful glare.

I managed a smirk. “No, but seriously. Where are you taking me?”

He glanced at me over his shoulder. “Okay. Just stay here a moment. I’ll be right back.”

I frowned, and opened my mouth to complain, but before I could say anything, Hiccup had disappeared into the trees. I had no choice but to wait where I was.

Only a few minutes later, I heard a rush of wind, and a midnight-black dragon landed in front of me. Hiccup sat astride Toothless, one hand in the air.

I yelped, taking a few quick steps backward. “I- shoot, Hiccup. Why are you…” My voice died as Toothless stared at me. A shiver ran down my spine, making me feel sick to my stomach.

“Y/n, it’s fine,” Hiccup assured. “He won’t hurt you. Will ya, bud?”

I shook my head, my throat tightening. “I- no. I can’t do this, Hiccup.” I took another step back, my entire body beginning to shake. This. This what had killed my parents. Dragons couldn’t be trusted. No matter how much Hiccup had tried to convince the village, I would never trust anyone, or anything, ever again.

Hiccup frowned. “Fine.” He leaned down and patted Toothless on the neck. “C’mon, bud. Let’s go.”

Without another word, Toothless spread his wings and they soared into the air.

I stood stock still for a whole minute before I realised I was holding my breath. I let it out all in a rush, and staggered a little. I reached out to hold onto a tree truck for support. My legs felt wobbly and unstable.

I decided it was best if I headed back for the village. I didn’t want to hang around in the woods today anymore. I had a sour taste in my mouth, and I needed some water.

I was twenty meters away from my cabin door when suddenly the ground beneath me was swept away. The village got smaller and smaller, and then I realised what was happening.

“Hiccup Haddock!” I shrieked. Toothless was holding onto my forearms, and I was suspended in the air.

“Yes, m’lady?”

“I am going to kill you!” I yelled up at him, panic temporarily pushing aside my utter agony at being defenceless against a dragon.

“Toothless, put her down,” Hiccup commanded.

Toothless flew around a huge pine tree that was significantly taller than most of the forest, and promptly dropped me onto its highest branches.

I clung to the tree truck, shaking. Tears clogged up my throat, and my legs were so trembly I thought I was going to fall and die.

“Y/n.”

At the sound of Hiccup’s voice, I slowly turned to face him. He looked almost sorry, but I knew that was impossible. The little wretch was trying to make me terrified, for what reason I could only guess. This was his biggest prank yet.

“Hiccup,” I said, trying to keep my voice level (and failing), “you will get me down from here, now.” I gripped the tree tighter. “You will take me home this instant, and you will never ever talk to me again. Do you understand?”

He blinked. “But—“

“Do you understand?!” I yelled.

“Fine,” he sighed. “Here.” He held out his hand.

I stared at it for a second, then gingerly reached out and rested my fingertips on his palm. A tingle ran up the length of my arm. He gripped my wrist, and pulled me up onto the dragon behind him.

Every part of my body that was in contact with the dragon’s felt heated up, like I could burst into flames at any moment. My head pounded in sync with my heartbeat, and my palms were getting sweaty. I was, in short, absolutely terrified.

“… let her down slowly.”

I realised Hiccup was talking. “You got that, bud?”

Toothless made an exasperated grunt, sounding more like a sarcastic teenager than a dragon. That didn’t make me feel any better.

Toothless slowly spread his wings, and for a second, I almost relaxed. Maybe he would fly down gently like Hiccup had asked.

The next second, my illusion shattered. Toothless took off so fast I almost toppled off. I was forced to grab onto the nearest thing to stay onboard (on-dragon?). Unfortunately, that thing happened to be Hiccup.

Whatever. I’d rather not die today. I gripped his shoulders so tightly my knuckles turned white. I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, as if not seeing would make it better for me.

The wind whipped in my ears, blowing my dark hair all around my face. I was so scared, so worried, so distraught I felt like crying. I couldn’t, though. I wasn’t dumb enough to cry in front of Hiccup. He would never let me hear the end of it.

Suddenly, I felt the dragon beneath me twisting sideways. We started spinning, twirling in tight circles. My grip tightened on Hiccup’s shoulders.

Someone was screaming, and I was like eighty-five percent sure it was me.

“Toothless!” Hiccup yelled. “Stop this right now! You’re scaring her!”

Toothless took that as a challenge, and dove toward the ocean a hundred feet below. He showed absolutely no signs of slowing or stopping in any way. I opened my eyes, wanting to at least be able to see something in case I died because of this.

“Thanks for nothing, you useless reptile,” Hiccup muttered. I slowly began to realise that maybe Hiccup wasn’t the one at fault here. Of course. It was the dragon’s fault. Dragons weren’t to be trusted, which was exactly what I’d been thinking this whole time.

Just as we were about to hit the water, Toothless opened up his wings. We shot upward, soaring towards the sugar-spun clouds above us.

We levelled out, and my muscles lost some of their tension. Toothless floated in the air, almost flying gently now. I remembered how to breathe, and let out a long, breathless sigh.

“Hiccup,” I managed, my voice hoarse. “I am going to murder you.”

I melted into him, partly in relief that I wasn’t dead, partly in exhausted terror. My arms went around his waist, my forehead falling to rest on his back. My eyes fluttered shut, and a lone tear streaked down my cheek.

Hiccup didn’t say anything for a long while, and so neither did I. Toothless flew long and slow and level, giving me the slightest chance of not murdering him, too.

I’m not sure how long we stayed like that. All I remember is Hiccup’s voice saying softly, “Sweet dreams, love,” before I fell into the welcome arms of sleep.

I woke slowly, curled in a ball inside a warm, soft bed that didn’t feel like mine. When I finally opened my eyes, I realised why it didn’t feel familiar. I wasn’t even in my house.

I sat up, looking around, trying to work out where I was. With a start, I couldn’t even think of a time I’d been inside any other houses in the village except for Astrid’s. I had no idea whose house this was.

“Morning, m’lady,” said a deep voice from the top of the stairs.

I groaned internally. “Oh, gosh, of course it’s you.” I found myself pulling my fingers through my hair, brushing it as nearly as I could, straightening my shirt, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

I dragged myself out of the bed. I was still dressed in the same clothes as yesterday, my usual top and skirt combo, with leggings underneath for warmth. My boots were lying on the floor, so I yanked them on.

I glanced up at Hiccup, who was hanging over the banisters, watching me. With a jolt, all the memories of yesterday flooded in.

Red-hot anger filled me. I clenched my fists. “Are you gonna come down here, or should I just murder you up there?”

Hiccup’s eyes widened. “I- what?”

“You heard me,” I muttered. My knife was missing from my belt, which was just great. I’d probably lost in on that horrific flight yesterday.

I stomped up the stairs, stopping on the one below the one Hiccup was standing on. He leaned against the banister, raising an eyebrow at me.

“Hey shortcake,” he whispered teasingly. “Sleep well?”

I gritted my teeth. “You are so beyond dead right now, Hiccup.”

He chuckled. “Hey. Blame Toothless, alright? There was nothing I could do!”

I wanted to roll my eyes. “Um, okay. And he’s your dragon.”

“That doesn’t mean I can control him!”

I didn’t answer, my gaze sliding away from Hiccup. I sighed, laid my palm on the cold wood banister. “I don’t ever want you to talk to me again, okay? I don’t want to see you; I don’t want to hear you. I don’t even want to know you exist.”

I felt a glistening tear streak its way down my cheek, dripping off the bottom of my chin. “Just—“ My voice broke. “Just leave me alone.”

I turned, and ran out of the house, leaving his door wide open. I headed for the only place I could think of; the woods.

I didn’t stop running until I was deep in the forest, surrounded by unfamiliar trees. I dropped to my knees in the dirt, buried my face in my hands and cried.

Hours later, I slowly rose to my feet. It was growing steadily dark, and the cold was seeping into my bone. I shivered, and wrapped my arms around myself as I walked around in a small circle.

I realised, horrified, that I was completely lost. I had no idea whatsoever where I was, which direction the village was, or what time of day it even was right now.

I eventually sat down on a rock, pulling my knees up to my chest. The darkness was growing. Soon, I didn’t think I would be able to see a thing. I began to get worried.

Who knew what things might be hiding in the shadows? My hand instinctively went to my belt, my my knife was gone. I cursed under my breath, and stood, pressing my back against a tree. I figured it would be safer than sitting on an exposed rock.

I shivered, wrapping my arms tighter around myself, my eyes turning towards the sky, hoping, for some insane reason, that someone might be out there looking for me.

Who was I kidding? Who was there that even cared about me that much? I didn’t have parents who were waiting back at home, wondering how late I was going to stay out. I didn’t have siblings who would notice my absence.

Astrid wouldn’t notice this late at night. I tended to wander during the day; she was used to that, but at night it wouldn’t even occur to her that I was anywhere but home.

Hiccup briefly crossed my mind, but I truly did not think he cared about me that much. I didn’t even want him to. I was still so mad at Hiccup, thinking about him made it hard to breathe. I hated him.

“I hate Hiccup Haddock,” I whispered under my breath, trying to make myself feel better. My breath made a wisp of steam in the cold air. I watched it as it floated into nothingness.

My vision suddenly blurred, but I couldn’t tell if it was because of exhaustion or tears. I slumped down to the ground, my legs giving way. I drew my knees close to my chest, hugging them to me. My chin rested on my knees, gazing out at the woods, though I could barely make out anything anymore. I couldn’t even see my own hand clearly, let alone anything else.

I’m not sure how long I sat there, but eventually, I slipped into a deep sleep, half-frozen, chilled to the bone, alone and crying in the darkness.

“Y/n! Y/n? Y/n/n?!”

My eyes fluttered open. I groaned in pain. I felt someone’s arms encircling me, carrying me, but I couldn’t make out anything. Everything was blurred, hazy. The person carrying me was talking, but it sounded far away and watery.

I slumped against the person’s shoulder, closing my eyes. I was tired: so, so tired. Everything ached; my head pounded and throbbed.

I don’t think I feel back asleep, but I wasn’t really aware of anything for a long while. Finally, the person slowed to a walk, and laid me down on a couch or a bed or something. A cup was held to my lips, and I gratefully accepted the water.

I blinked several times, and my eyes focused on a very familiar looking boy, who’s green eyes were staring down at me, full of concern.

“Hiccup?” I asked weakly. “What are you…?”

“I found you in the middle of the woods,” Hiccup replied, his eyes darkening slightly. “Are you okay? Do you need anything else? More water? Are-are you warm enough?”

I laid my head back, rubbing my thumb against my throbbing temple. I let out a long sigh, whether it was of annoyance or exhaustion or pain, I wasn’t sure.

“I hate you so much,” I muttered.

“Gee, thanks,” Hiccup answered. He held the back of his hand against my forehead, testing my temperature. “You don’t seem to be too sick. I think you’re going to be okay,” he said, almost to himself.

“I’m not sick at all,” I said firmly. “I don’t even know why you’re taking care of me. I don’t need you. You—“ My voice suddenly broke with emotion. “You did this to me.”

Hiccup’s eyes filled with sorrow. “Look, Y/n/n—“

“Don’t call me that,” I snapped.

He blinked. “Y/n. I-I am so sorry for what happened yesterday. I, well, I thought it might make it better if you saw that dragons aren’t always vicious. Um…” He glanced down, rubbing the back of his neck. “Toothless didn’t really get the memo.”

He looked at me. “I’m really sorry, Y/n. And I hope that maybe someday you can find it in you to forgive me.” He stood, brushed off his pants, and left, closing the door gently behind him.

I lay there for a while, staring up at the ceiling. I hadn’t noticed it at first, but Hiccup had brought me home. I was in my bed, in my house. I could hear small noises from downstairs, which meant that Hiccup was still here. I wasn’t sure what he was doing down there, but I didn’t really care.

What I cared about right now was what he’d said. And what it had made happen inside of me. Was I really as mad at him as I thought I was? After all, he’d gone out and found me, brought me home, taken care of me. Maybe he’d been trying to be nice, and it really was Toothless who had been doing all those things to me. (Which just proved all my theories that dragons weren’t to be trusted).

I thought again of Hiccup’s eyes staring down at me, his sad voice asking me for forgiveness. The worry in his expression when he asked if I was okay. I hated how much I’d liked that. I hadn’t ever been in love, or even had a crush on anyone. I wasn’t sure if this even was a crush, but if it was, I didn’t like it.

I didn’t like the swirling in my stomach when I heard Hiccup’s voice. I hated how much I suddenly wanted him near me. I disliked how I kind of trusted him. I didn’t want to be in love. I didn’t want to have somebody I believed in again.

Last time I’d loved someone, trusted someone, all they’d done was break my heart and leave me forever. My parents. I wondered if part of my hatred inside was because I’d never truly forgiven them for leaving. For dying and not coming back for me like they’d sworn they would. I blinked back tears, brushing my cheeks with the back of my hand.

I swung my legs out of the bed, standing. I swayed a bit at first, but I forced myself to be steady. I yanked on my boots and slowly pushed open my bedroom door. I stepped out onto the landing, peeping over the edge of the banisters.

Hiccup was down in the kitchen. I was shocked at how much cleaner everything looked. I barely ever tidied up. Not that things got particularly dirty, as I spent little time here, but dust had certainly stocked up over the years. Hiccup had scrubbed away the five years of dirt from my home, and it was sparkling.

Something smelled good, too. It hit me like a brick wall that the fire was going, and Hiccup was cooking something over it. It looked like soup or something similar. I hadn’t had a home cooked meal for ages. I hated cooking, so I just lived on things I grew in the garden, or tidbits from friends.

I shifted slightly, and a floorboard underneath me creaked. Hiccup glanced up, and when he saw me, a slight smile flickered across his face. “Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” I said back, not sure what else to say. I mean, I’d just yelled at him, and made it pretty clear I didn’t ever want to talk to him again. What do you say to someone who’s just cleaned your entire house and taken care of you after you told them that? “What are you making?”

Hiccup glanced down at the pot he was stirring, then back up at me. “Chicken and potato soup. Want some?”

I hesitated, but nodded, with a small shrug. “Why not.” I slowly walked down the stairs, my eyes on Hiccup the whole time. I couldn’t seem to tear my eyes away from him.

He noticed me staring and smiled nervously. “What? Am I in trouble?”

I found myself slowly shaking my head. “No, I don’t think so.” I allowed myself a small, watery smile. “At least not yet.”

Hiccup grinned. “Good. Now sit down and eat.”

I obeyed, setting myself down at the old dining table. I wiped my palm on the wood, expecting it to be coated it dirt, but it shone with new cleanliness. My eyes suddenly filled with tears.

“Hiccup…” was all I could manage.

Immediately, Hiccup knelt in front of me. “What’s wrong?” he asked, almost urgently, staring up into my eyes. “Are you alright?”

I swallowed. “You-you cleaned the house… you’re cooking… I- you…” I let out a broken sob.

For so long, so one had cared. Astrid cared the most, but she was busy with Stormfly and her new baby brother and life in general. She’d offered a few times to have me stay with her and her family, but I’d known that would be far too hard for them. I’d always politely told her I was just fine on my own, thank you. But I wasn’t. I knew that. I needed someone to care so badly that now that someone did, someone cared, it almost hurt.

“Hey, hey,” Hiccup said softly, grabbing me by the shoulders. I realised I was shaking.

“It’s alright,” he assured me. “Come here.” He brought me into a hug, which at first both startled and scared me, but then I melted into it. The hug felt unfamiliar, different, awkward. But nice, somehow.

But this was Hiccup. I untangled myself from him. “Uh,” I stammered, tucking my hair behind my ear, eyes flitting away. “Thanks.”

Hiccup shrugged. “It’s fine.” He stood slowly. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

I nodded. “Yes. I mean, no. I-I guess? I’m not sure…” I stared up at him. “Hiccup, why are you doing this?”

His eyes narrowed slightly. “What do you mean?” He gestured around. “You needed help. You need help. I am the son of the chief; soon to be the chief myself. It’s my job to help the village.”

Something inside me wilted a little. So this was just part of the job to him? The rest of me internally yelled at that bit to shut up, and that we hated Hiccup, so it doesn’t matter what he does. But why did I hate Hiccup?

Thinking back on it now, I really didn’t think he had ever done anything truly bad towards me. Yeah, sure, he’d been a total tease, but I was a rude, bitter, secluded brat to be honest. I didn’t deserve any help from him.

I blinked back unwanted tears. “Um, well, I really appreciate it,” I said. “It was really nice of you to come looking for me.”

Hiccup studied my face for a moment, then pursed his lips and nodded once. “It’s okay, Y/n/n.”

Something inside me jolted. No one had called me that in years before today, when Hiccup had started to. It was the nickname my father had given me. Hearing Hiccup use it had just opened up a deep wound inside me I hadn’t even remembered.

“Please don’t call me that,” I whispered, staring at the floorboards. My feet hung limply in the air just above the floor.

Hiccup glanced over at me from where he was standing, stirring the soup. “Um, okay. Sorry, Y/n.” He stressed my name, saying it slightly slower than the rest of his words.

There was so much tension in the air, and I realised it was all my fault. I made the room awkward and made Hiccup have to watch everything he said. I was a terrible person.

I’d even told Hiccup never to talk to me again, right after I’d woken up in his house. It hit me that he must’ve taken me there after the awful flight on Toothless. Then, I’d screamed in his face that I hated him, and gotten myself lost in the woods because I was selfish and prideful and full of hate.

Even then, Hiccup had gone out and found me. Who knew how long that had taken him? He’d brought me back here, cleaned my house, made me food, and for what? For me to be snappy, harsh, and rude.

I ran my tongue over my lower lip, staring resolutely at the floor. “Hiccup?” I managed finally.

“Yeah?”

“Why are you doing this?” I looked at him, leaning forward with my elbows on my knees. “Be honest.”

Hiccup hesitated, stirring the wooden spoon listlessly around the soup. “What do you mean?” he said finally.

I sighed, sitting up straight and brushing off my skirts. “You know… helping me.” I have a little laugh. “Heavens knows you don’t need to. So why are you really doing all this?”

Hiccup chewed his lip. “Because I’m going to be the Chief of Berk pretty soon. I need to be able to protect my people.” His gaze fixed on mine. “Even when they don’t like me, or want me to.”

Under his fierce eyes, my insides crinkled. I felt exposed, as if I was being examined under a bright light. I dropped my gaze.

“I’m sorry…” I managed, the words sounding funny in my mouth. I hadn’t apologised to Hiccup, for anything, ever.

“It’s okay.” His voice sounded surprisingly even, like he wasn’t even bothered about all this. So it was just me feeling all these things, was it? He was truly just doing this out of a sense of duty. And honestly, why shouldn’t he? I’d already told myself I was a rude little brat, to be totally honest. I didn’t deserve to have people look after me, at all.

I didn’t meet Hiccup’s eyes. “Um, that’s cool. But thank you, really.”

Hiccup nodded, and handed me a steaming mug of hot soup. “Eat up,” he said. “I’ll leave you the rest… have a good night, Y/n.”

And with that, he disappeared. The house felt suddenly very small and lonely, and I shrunk into myself, staring into the fire, sipping tiny bits of soup until I was all warmed up inside.

I gazed around the cabin. It looked so different, all shining and clean. It made me feel like maybe I might be able to move on; get over them leaving me. I shook my head. That would never happen. I didn’t think I was capable of letting it go, of moving forward with my life. I was seventeen years old, and I still held a grudge against my parents for ‘abandoning’ me when I was twelve.

Thoughts whirled through my brain, at an almost dizzying rate. I left my mug on the table, and went to stand by the open window, facing out into the main road of Berk.

A few children were playing in it, kicking a round wooden ball to each other. I watched them for a minute or two, before an absurd idea struck me. I pushed open the front door. “Hey!” I yelled.

The kids turned to look at me, momentarily forgetting their game. “Can I join you guys?” I asked, feeling brave.

The oldest girl looked confused for a moment, then after a brief pause, gave me a smile and a nod. “Sure!” she called.

I grinned, and shut my door behind me, jogging over to them. Playing ball was something I hadn’t done in years, but it felt good to just relax for a while. Plus, it was amazing to see others doing an activity that didn’t revolve around dragons, so I could join in.

Dragons. I shuddered a little, remembering the awful ride on Toothless, and making my feelings around Hiccup even more complicated.

After a good long play, I collapsed to the ground in a heap, blowing up my breath. “Gosh,” I managed. “I can see why kids like playing ball. It’s fun.” I offered the girl who’d let me come play with them a small smile.

“You’re Y/n, aren’t you?” the girl asked, her eyes narrowing slightly.

I hesitated. How did they know who I was? I never really talked to anyone except Astrid, Hiccup and a few other people. Certainly not the children.

“Yeah, I am,” I said slowly. “How do you know my name?”

The little girl allowed herself a smug smile. “Hiccup told us about you.” Turning, she threw the ball to one of her friends.

I was dumbfounded. “Hiccup?”

The girl nodded. “Yeah. He told us you guys used to be friends but now you’re mean to him and won’t let him be nice to you anymore. He said he misses being your friend.”

I wrinkled my nose, staring at her. “Hiccup said he misses me?” I scoffed finally. “There’s no way. You must have heard him wrong. Hiccup hurt me incredibly badly when we were six years old, and ever since then he’s teased and bothered me almost to death. I will never be his friend again.”

I stood, suddenly angry all over again. Angry about how hurt I was, how much I hated Hiccup and my parents for hurting me. I clenched my teeth. “Thank you for letting me join you. Bye.”

I turned and began the walk uphill to Astrid’s house. Right now, I really needed to see my best friend.

When Astrid opened the door, she immediately noticed something was wrong. She frowned. “Are you alright?”

I shook my head. “Everything is so hopeless, A.”

Astrid made a sympathetic face and pulled me into a tight embrace. “It’s okay,” she whispered into my shoulder. “Come on, come inside. It’s freezing.”

Maybe it was. I felt so numb I didn’t think I would’ve noticed even if it was cold enough to give me frostbite. I felt like my insides were frozen, unable to feel anything at all.

Astrid pulled me inside, sitting me down on a chair beside the roaring fire. She knelt down in front of me. “What happened?” she asked, staring into my face.

I shook my head, looking away from her. “I… I don’t even know…” I began to cry, dropping my head in my hands.

Astrid pursed her lips, hugging me again. “Is it your parents? Hiccup? Tell me.”

I took a deep breath, and slowly began to tell her the entire story, beginning yesterday, when Hiccup took me into the woods and the whole, horrible ride on Toothless began. I kept my eyes steadily fixed on the fire as I spoke, quietly recounting the flight, the fight, being lost in the woods and then Hiccup rescuing me and cleaning my house. I even told her about the awkward hug.

The only thing I couldn’t manage to admit to Astrid was how I felt about Hiccup. I couldn’t decide if I hated his guts, or if I wanted nothing more than to be in his arms again.

When I was finished, Astrid let out a long sigh. “I’m sorry, babe,” she said. “But if you ask me… Hiccup wasn’t at fault for what Toothless was doing during that flight. I think he might be telling you the truth; that he just wanted you to see that dragons aren’t dangerous.”

I nodded slowly. I was beginning to believe that. Of course, that just made me hate dragons even more, but there was no point saying that aloud. Astrid knew I hated dragons even more than I hated Hiccup. I would never, ever trust a dragon.

Astrid studied me. “Do you want to know what else I think?”

I glanced at her. “By the look on your face, no. But I guess you’re going to tell me anyway, so… sure.”

Astrid suppressed a smile. “You know me too well,” she said. “But, what I think is, you don’t hate Hiccup at all. You’re just angry. At your parents mostly. But Hiccup hurt you too, years ago. You’re alone now, so you’re taking out your anger on the only person you have any sort of justification to do so to.”

I was silent. Sadly, her words rang hard and true. I could finally see that, yes, my hatred of Hiccup was really just anger at myself, and my parents. It had honestly nothing to do with Hiccup himself. He’d just been unfortunate enough to annoy me all those years ago, so now I’d decided to hate him because of it.

I shook my head in disbelief. “I’ve been so stupid,” I muttered.

“Not stupid,” Astrid said. “Kinda crazy, maybe, but not stupid.”

I looked at her. “I think… I think I should go and apologize to someone.”

She smiled. “Go.”

I jumped to my feet and ran, leaving her front door swinging open in the wind.

I didn’t stop running until I reached Hiccup’s house. I burst inside without thinking about knocking, but stopped short on the threshold.

“Stoick!” I gaped, trying to find the right words. “I, I am so sorry—“

“Y/n,” Stoick replied, getting to his feet. “What brings you here in such a hurry?” His eyes narrowed. “Are you alright?”

I nodded breathlessly. “What? Yes. Yes, I’m fine, thanks, I just —“

“Were you looking for Hiccup?”

I pursed my lips. “I might’ve been.”

Stoick chuckled. “You’ve got spirit, lass. I like that about you.”

I blinked. “Um, thank you?”

“He’s at the beach.”

I smiled. “Thank you, Chief.”

The path that ran towards the beach was thin and steep, covered in loose rocks that skidded under my shoes. More than once I almost fell off the cliff side.

When I reached the beach, I was surprised at how small it seemed. Then again, I hadn’t been here since I was little. I guess my memories of it had faded. With a start, I realised that the last time I had been here was probably with Hiccup himself, back when we were small and best friends.

I spotted Hiccup’s figure walking through the surf a few hundred meters away. I started toward him, slowly in case I scared him with a sudden approach.

The beach itself was small and rocky, round black stones instead of proper sand. The waves here were little and inconsistent, barely making a splash. Sometimes in the summer, we would have a day or two of good weather, and the waves would be bigger, but that was a pretty rare occurrence.

I reached Hiccup, who was now standing with his hands buried in his pockets, his eyes fixed on the horizon.

“What do you see?” I whispered.

“Freedom,” he replied softly, turning to look at me. “When I’m riding Toothless, nothing is impossible. Me, a human, can fly on the back of a dragon. There is something magical about that, Y/n.”

I chewed my lip, considering his words. I guess there was something amazing about that fact, but still… dragons.

“Um,” I said. “I came here to apologise.”

Hiccup’s green eyes turned a darker shade. “For what?”

I dug the side of my shoe in the sand, my eyes sliding away from his. “For… everything.”

He waited, his eyes roaming my face.

I swallowed. “For not being your friend when I should have been. For hating you and your love for dragons. For being a terrible person. For hitting you and hating you and making your life miserable.” During this little speech, my voice had gotten higher and louder. Now it broke, and I felt tears brimming to my eyes. “I’m so sorry, Hiccup,” I cried.

Hiccup didn’t say anything. He stared at me for a count of five, while tears began to stream down my cheeks. What was wrong with me this week? For years, I’d barely cried at all, hiding my emotions inside. Now I was crying, again.

Hiccup did something I didn’t expect. He grabbed my face between his hands. They were tougher than I would’ve thought, calloused and hard from working with metals and wood and materials. He stared into my eyes for long enough for my tears to stop flowing. “Y/n,” he said. “It’s okay. You were forgiven years ago.”

He pulled me into a tight embrace. A week ago, I would’ve fought and hit and yelled at him, but now? I melted into Hiccup’s body, burying my face in his chest and wrapping my arms tightly around him, letting my tears flow freely.

For the first time since my parents died, I felt at peace.

For the next three weeks, I tried my hardest to start a routine. To start cleaning my house, cooking meals every day, and (the hardest part of all), going out and talking to someone each and every morning.

Sometimes I just talked to Astrid, when it got bad and I truly couldn’t get enough emotion energy to talk to anyone else. But sometimes I managed. I talked to the kids playing in the streets, to the other girls I never really talked to before, to the guys helping out in the dragon-saddle-making workshop.

But mostly, I talked to Hiccup. I talked to him as if we’d never stopped being friends, as if we were six years old again. It honestly surprised me how easy it was to get along with him now that I didn’t have an eternal grudge against him. Hiccup was still the same person he’d always been. It was me who had changed.

I made an effort to even start working. I’d never done anything like it before, really, but it was honestly alright. I had a few shifts at the dragon workshop a week, and it was kind of fun after a while. Yeah, sure, I still got terrified when someone actually brought their dragon to the shop, but for the most part it was good.

Hiccup worked there sometimes as well, and so did Stoick. Astrid didn’t, because she was a dragon trainer and didn’t really have the time. I would’ve liked it if we were able to work together, but there was no way I would be able to train dragons. At all.

But, you know, life was pretty alright. I still had scars, deep and hidden and probably incurable, but I also had friends. And hope. And maybe, just maybe, a future.

I woke up screaming. My bedsheets were clutched tight in my fists, a tangled mess around my legs. Hot tears were still rolling down my cheeks, and my chest heaved, as if I’d just run the length of the island in my sleep.

I tried to swallow, tried to even out my breathing. My mouth was so dry I could barely swallow properly. I reached for the glass of water that I always had beside my bed, and gulped it down.

I could still evision the awful images from my dreams. Hiccup, Astrid, my parents, all trapped in a circle of flaming dragons. They were screaming for me, calling my name. I couldn’t move, my legs seemingly stuck to the ground. I could do nothing but watch as the dragons slowly spread over the bodies of my loved ones, devouring them. I sank to my knees, screaming in agony.

I shivered, climbing out from under the sheets. I needed to get out of this empty house. I didn’t care if it was the middle of the night, I had to see someone.

I hurried down the stairs, bursting out into the night. Stars glittered in the sky, the night quiet and bright. The cold wind hit me like a wall, and I shuddered. I hadn’t thought of grabbing my jacket.

My feet moved faster than my mind, taking me somewhere that I didn’t even know I wanted to be. I slipped inside Hiccup’s house, tiptoeing to where I knew his room was.

Outside his door, I finally realised what I was doing. Sneaking into Hiccup’s room in the dead of night? What was I thinking? Was I crazy?

Maybe I am, I thought, slowly pushing open Hiccup’s door. I stood still on his doorway for a moment, before quietly slipping over to the side of his bed.

“Hiccup?” I breathed, almost soundlessly.

“Y/n?” Hiccup was instantly awake, sitting up in his bed. “What are you…? Why are you here? Are you okay?” His voice was hoarse from sleep, and he squinted at me.

I hesitated. What was I supposed to say? Oh, I just had a dream about you dying and it terrified me so I’m here to make sure you’re still alive? Of course I wasn’t going to say that.

“I had a nightmare.” I bit my lip, shifting from foot to foot. Maybe this hadn’t been such a good idea.

Hiccup’s dark eyes gazed into mine. He leaned back slightly, so he could see me more clearly. “Why did you come to me?” he asked quietly, his voice ragged and raspy.

I dropped my gaze. “You were the only one I thought of coming to,” I whispered. “I knew you wouldn’t mind.”

“Of course I wouldn’t mind,” Hiccup said. “Do… do you want to stay here? Or do you want me to walk you back to your house?”

I hesitated. “Could I please just stay here, with you?” I met his eyes for a brief second.

He smiled. “Anything for you.” He said it so flippantly, I might’ve missed it any other time. But my brains snagged on the words, turning them over and over in my mind. Anything for you…

“Thank you, Hiccup,” I whispered. We were both silent for a while. “Can I… can I stay with you until morning?” I asked.

Hiccup stared at me, then nodded. I slowly crawled onto his bed, leaning against the bed-head. Hiccup glanced at me, then lay back down on his pillow. After a moment, I snuggled down next to him, hyper aware of every part of my body under the sheets.

We were nose to nose. I could feel his hot breath on my face. His green eyes glittered in the darkness.

“Goodnight y/n,” he whispered groggily. “I hope you don’t have any more nightmares.” With that, he closed his eyes, and I heard no more from him.

[8myass]

OH MY GOD HIIII ur blog looks supa cool it’s so nice to meet u lele 😁😁

can i be 🧺 anon and request haechan hate sex 🥴🥴🥴 god i’m obsessed w that man

hi hi! thank you so much! of course, you can be 🧺 anon! thank you for making the first-ever request on my page. it was super fun to write this! i, too, am very obsessed with this man, he's genuinely too fine. i hope you enjoy it!! pairing. lee donghyuck/haechan x female reader genre. angst, smut (w plot) pov. second person (you, yours, yourself, etc.) wc. 1.6k cw. enemy!haechan, slight bimbo!reader, mean dom!hae, bratty sub!reader tw. alcohol consumption, mentions infidelity and breakup, slight dubcon aspects (bc of the wording, it seems very noncon at first), cursing, mentions blood, name calling (‘bitch’, ‘whore’, ‘toy’), face-fucking, deepthroating, degradation, slight praise (typically only ever mixed with degradation), hate sex (obvi), p in v, unprotected sex (wrap your meat fellas), ass slapping, pet names (‘babe’, ‘baby’), hair pulling, breeding, haechan’s just mean idk??

“Can you at least pretend to love me? Just for tonight?” Haechan frowned, his vision blurred from an extensive amount of alcohol, hung over your shoulder as you dragged him to your car, somehow being left with the responsibility of taking him home after he was found passed out on your friend’s couch. Your friend claimed she had to clean the party that wiped through her house like a hurricane but fell asleep in the bathroom by the toilet, droplets of vomit littering the toilet seat, and more chunks in the bowl. 

You rolled your eyes, popping open the door of the passenger’s side to your vehicle, “You’re fucking ridiculous.” Throwing him in the car, you shut the door and dragged your feet to the driver’s side door, sitting down to instantly start the engine up. He didn’t buckle up, slouching down in the seat, eyes dazed. You looked over at him and sighed, shaking your head, “What happened to you, man? Why’d you drink so much?”

“My girl cheated on me,” he laughed, the amusement in his tone holding the deepest pain you remember hearing your entire life. “We’re not together anymore.”

You didn’t know how to reply, never feeling so much sympathy for someone who you despised so incredibly. “Do you miss her?”

“How could I not? She was my world all through high school, no one else meant as much to me as she did,” he exhaled deeply, his voice cracking, sounding like he was on the verge of tears. 

You sat in silence for a couple of minutes, the drive becoming awkward in the quietness. You still didn’t know what to say, unable to comprehend whether he wanted to find comfort in you at such an awful time. 

“It’s right here,” he pointed out the window as you pulled up his street, stepping on the brakes as soon as you heard his words. 

“This place?” you scoffed, looking at him with your typical disgusted expression, accidentally forgetting the deep emotional conversation you two just had. The place was old, moss growing up the sides of the former white-painted house that had now turned brown due to being behind on cleaning. The windows were clouded, blinds pale and stained, the wood of the door cracked. “It’s a dump.”

He sighed lowly, getting out of the car with a quick shove, turning on his heels to look at you, “Can you come in?”

“You want me to come into your house?” you raised an eyebrow, but something told you to accept his offer, “Fine, just until you sober up.”

You unbuckled and followed him into his garbage site that he claimed was his house, watching him chug water bottle after water bottle sitting at the small, two-person table across from him. 

“Don’t choke, I might laugh,” you chuckled as he continued to gulp down the remaining water in the bottle, eyes narrowing while looking at you. 

“You’re annoying,” he huffed, slamming the bottle down on the table. 

“Yeah, not the first time you’ve told me that,” you snorted, “Are you sobered up yet? Can I go now, Mr. I-need-you-to-come-help-make-sure-I-don’t-choke-on-my-own-vomit?”

“Screw you,” he groaned, standing up and throwing away the plastic bottle into the green recycling bin next to his dirtied fridge. You stood up as well, hurrying toward the door, taking that as a ‘get the hell out, bitch’. Typically, that’d be what that meant, you weren’t wrong for thinking that. 

“Where are you going?” you heard his voice right next to your ear as your body was pressed against the door before your hand could reach the doorknob.

“I’m leaving, you’re sober now,” you squirmed in his grip, his thumbs pressed to the back of your hips to hold your body against the chilled wood. “Don’t touch me, let go of me.”

“Why would I do that? I’m finally available, I can finally touch you how I please,” he hummed, one finger tracing down your spine, his opposing hand slipping up your skin-tight dress, pressing his palm against the delicate skin of your inner thigh. 

“Don’t touch me,” you growled, squirming more aggressively in his grasp. “You’re disgusting, I hate you. Let me go before I kick your dick in.”

“God, you’re so fucking annoying,” he managed to flip your fussy form around so he could look into your pleading eyes. In an instant, you were on your knees, cock down your throat, gagging you to the point of tears pouring down your cheeks, slobber coating your chin as his balls smacked the remnants of your filth off your face and down onto your thighs. 

“Fuck, bitch, that’s so good,” he moaned, smirk popping onto his face as his head fell back. Your tongue looped around his cock as he repeatedly fucked your face, your nails digging into the skin of his thighs so tightly that it nearly drew blood. His fingers were laced through your hair, keeping your head in place as he thrusts himself into your mouth. He scrunched his nose up a few times as he felt your teeth brush against his dick, “A little less teeth, okay?”

“What’s the matter? Don’t act like you haven’t done this before, I’m sure you’ve had a cock down your throat every night since we last saw each other,” he scoffed, looking down at the way your eyes gazed at him with a gentle glint in them. You had only just seen him a few days ago, but you have been with a man every night since then. It was a good time killer, how could you not let some random guy fuck the daylights outta you just for funsies? “You never had something so big down your throat, is that the problem?”

You gagged in response to his question, drool pooling out around the seams of your mouth. His cock was coated in your sticky saliva by now, his tip reaching down your throat, precum leaking out around it. 

“You sound so much better gagging on my dick,” he chuckled, forcing himself entirely into your mouth until your nose was pressed against his pelvis, choking on the cum pouring out of his tip as trails of moans came out of his hung open mouth. “Yeah, that’s so fucking good, babe.”

After pulling out of your weak mouth, you didn’t have much time to bitch at him before you were bent over the table, dress forced up and panties ripped off, already rehardened cock slipped inside your dripping cunt. 

“So wet? Is this for me?” he muttered against the skin of your neck, moans spilling from your parted lips, throat way too sore to reach the volumes you currently were. “Did you like sucking my cock? How about this? Do you like this, hm?”

You frantically nodded as you felt his hands slide up your dress to roughly play with your boobs, thumbs circling over your sensitive nipples, “Ye-yeah, feels good.”

“Fuck, you’re such a whore, you know that?” he growled, smacking your ass after pulling his hand from your boob, the other one still lingering. “Gonna let me fuck you like this after just claiming you hate me?”

“I do hate you,” you scoffed, trying to sound strong, but your voice came out more unstable than you had originally planned. You did hate him, you just might not have hated this moment. The sex was good, I mean, how could you say no?

“I hate you too, don’t worry,” he snarled, grabbing a fistful of your hair to pull your head toward him, your back pressed against his chest. “I’m using you, baby. Only to pass the time, only to get her off my mind. You are simply a toy, that’s all.”

“You think she’s ever gonna come back?” you mocked, head slightly turning so your eyes could meet his, which had soon turned into a glare directed at you, “I can’t be a placeholder for someone who’s not coming back.”

“Shut the fuck up, toy,” he growled, upper lip twitching as he pushed you back down onto the table, pressing his palm to the center of your back to hold you there as the other gripped your hip tightly, his thrusts becoming harder yet sloppier. 

He was beyond enraged by your comments, and the movements of his own hips against your poor body really showed that. You were a whimpering and crying mess as soon as he became angry with you, almost making you want to sob out an apology, but you wouldn’t degrade yourself so much as to actually apologize to him, it’s bad enough you were letting him fuck you.

“I think you’re gonna make a good cumdump from now on,” he moaned loudly, his moans echoing throughout the rest of the kitchen. “I’ll use you however I please.”

“Scr-screw y-you,” you whined, continuing to be a little bitch to him, not realizing where it gets you. 

He groaned as he continued thrusting himself into you, head falling back as he smacked your ass again at your words. You squealed and dipped your head down against the table, burying your forehead into your arms. Your bodies colliding rocked the entire table, the sound of its creaking spread through the room.

Soon enough, he had let loose strands of cum inside you, feeling his hot liquid fill your insides as loud moans flew out of his mouth, desperate and frantic cries falling out of you, your release also shaking your body, cum seeping out around his cock. 

“Shit, maybe we should do this more often,” he’d say only as he’s rebuttoning his pants and you’re fixing your dress, wiping your mouth of the drool that poured out of the corners of your lips, patting away the dried tears coating your flushed cheeks.

“Yeah, whatever,” you rolled your eyes and stormed out of his house, ‘hoping’ you’d never see him again, but knowing damn well you’d cave and show up to his place the following night, all for a round two…

[ayyyez]

"Extra fandom options" she says, as if she means anything other than haikyuu 😂 Heheh of course you may do whatever you want always but you know what I'm here for, gotta be on brand.

SO if you have any thoughts of Tanaka and Ennoshita in a romantic relationship headcannons, either solo or in a poly relationship, I'd love to read them! Fluff and/or spicy, you know I'll happily read and gush over what you write. Thanks and you look good today!

Also first.

a/n: not these sitting in my inbox forever. But hey look I’ve finally gotten around to them bc I wanna think about hq while my sinuses hate me 😂 but im doing these first for you 🫡

Tags: relationship headcanons, fluff, kissing, spooning, confessing, poly (at the end)

Characters: Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Ennoshita Chikara (with x reader and poly [seperated])

Tanaka

God this guy is the most in love sap you would ever encounter but he’s so endearing.

After the whole ‘marry me’ Kiyoko situation he decides to hold back a little when he has a crush. But this is by Tanakas standards. His holding back is he very obviously has a crush on you but isn’t asking you out (or to marry you) right away.

Being near you and gestures are his go to. It’s canon. And how he reacts depends on how you are.

If you’re the type to go out of your way to talk to him then he’s like doki doki BEST DAY EVER! but also isn’t 10/10 intense every time you talk to him. He chills a little. BUT STILL DEDICATED TO YOU.

If you’re more naive or the shy type then just a small smile from you is enough to get him through the day. Very much oh boy they looked at me I’m the best wing spiker in the world.

To get into a relationship with him one of two things need to happen.

One: you gotta give him a sign that you are into him. Flirt-Tease him about his antics (particularly the taking shirt of woo) or just give him a compliment saying you’re into him. Give him smiles more than anyone else. Then he’s just ‘go out with me PLEASE.’

Two: ask him out. He will combust and Tanaka.exe will stop working for a moment. But then he’s like OKAY. (Doesn’t wanna fuck it up and over do it. It’s steered him wrong before)

Dating this guy means waking up the luckiest person ever. You are SPOILED with attention, gestures and affection.

Man is a personal heater. Big spoon, little spoon, doesn’t matter longs you be spooning.

A bit of a restless sleeper and sleep talker. It’s kinda funny the silly things he says. One time yelled ‘LEFFFFT’ in his sleep.

The only way to stop the wriggling is spooning him harder than you’ve spooned before. Still has a stray leg flicking every now and again but it’s better.

His first kiss has him sweating the details. Wants to make it perfect like in those manga he reads but overthinks it. He takes ages to do it if you want him to initiate.

Just kiss him honestly. The reaction is worth it. The reddest blush. Once again stops working.

Once he’s done it though his smooches are so good. Passionate boy starts soft then HES HUNGRY FOR MORE. Very intense. Kinda awkward with his tongue at first but he gets it.

He’s big on physical touch but it doesn’t have to be big. A hand held is gold to him. Cuddling is just something he lives for.

Cannot handle alcohol so you’re carrying (or organising others to) carry his ass home. Super sappy and happy drunk. ‘I love… youuuuuu’. A crier too. He just feels extra hard.

Get a couple into him though and he dances like no one’s watching. Actually not half bad until he starts stripping. Only you can stop him. He’s too obsessed with you to care about anything else he was doing.

Makeouts on the couch are BIG with him. Won’t take it further until you ask. Gotta be a gentleman. Yes even when his hands are squeezing your ass.

Ennoshita Chikara

The type to silently indulge in his crush every now and again while FIGHTING and PUSHING those feelings down.

At least, that’s how it is at first. He will be your friend first so he doesn’t want to compromise that. Just let’s pretend we don’t feel that for now shall we?

As if he could hold that back. It takes a while but it’s not long before something pushes him (he’s afraid of losing you) and he’s spilling his feelings.

He may be spilling but he’s seems like he’s confident with the monologue that comes out of his mouth. When he finishes his eyes are just wide and staring at your shoes. Evidently he was not so confident.

Grab one of this clenched fists. Pull his chin up to face you. Tell him you feel (maybe not in as many words as he did) the same way.

‘Are you sure!?’ ENNOSHITA PLEASE.

Honestly takes a while to accept it but once he does he is noticeably on top of the world.

Doesn’t announce it to the world but once people asks he’s smuggly like YEP WE ARE INDEED DATING peasants. Like damn Ennoshita.

A very caring and protective guy. Lets you do your thing while watching your back from the sidelines. Will punch people for you but won’t let that slip.

Very much a words of affirmation, tease and quality time dude.

Will go with the flow but will absolutely take charge.

His first kisses are those cute gesture ones. A kiss on the cheek, a peck on the lips or a smooch planted on the forehead.

You gotta grab this man by the cheeks and just plant one passionate kiss on him. That leaves him frozen for a second and then oop self control gone. MAKE OUT TIME.

More of an alone time physical touch guy but will break that when he’s particularly ehem into you. Or if some jerk thinks they can pick you up.

Plants one on you while maintaining eye contact with said jerk. Or places a very in your face arm around your shoulders.

Very much a big spoon guy. It just makes him feel protective. Also kind of like he’s leeching your hair warmth.

Pretty chill sleeper. Once he’s out he doesn’t move much. Sometimes you wake up facing him and he’s blowing air in your face (sleep breathing).

Kiss his nose and he’ll scrunch it in his sleep and let out a soft ‘mmm?’ But doesn’t wake up.

Tanaka and Ennoshita poly

You’re all in a relationship. Tanaka and Ennoshita included. Their crush on each other goes back a while they just never wanted to admit it.

You coming into their lives kind of makes it easier. Well eventually.

Once they realise they both have a crush on you both of them want to be the better man and let them have you. (Even if a small part inside them is screaming for the opposite).

It’s up to you to set them down and be like ‘nah uh I’ll have both’ and then also set them onto the path of realising they also like each other. It’s a very eventful week.

Ennoshita is still the big spoon. You’re the middle. Tanaka is either little or wrapped around you like a Koala. Depends on the day.

Ennoshita is the wrangler and kind of takes charge when he needs to. Tanaka is the passionate but also softy. It’s up to you whether you want to continuously go with the flow or take charge every now and again.

Just imagine sitting on the couch between them and taking turns making out. Start with Tanaka then come up for air and turn to Ennoshita. He’s a bit more intense when he’s second, handsy too. Then sit back and watch them kiss each other.

Every now and again you get home late and find them either cuddling or asleep in each others arms on the couch with some movie playing in the background.

Ennoshita brings his (grand) movie collection to the relationship. Tanaka brings his home gym. You tie it all together by hyping up both.

[umeoniii]

Can you do lesbian fluff (or smut) for the aot girls????

lesbian relationship hcs w aot girls

nsfw & sfw

w: annie, mikasa, sasha,

annie:

☆ very introverted obvi, but she can actually be very extroverted w her s/o

☆ prefers cute dates at food places like bakeries or sushi restaurants

☆ loves when her s/o makes her sweets

☆ for gifts i feel like she writes things, like letters or poems maybe even a song (probably too embarrassed to sing though)

☆ not the most affectionate but when she is she’s a lot, like a lil puppy dog

☆ sleeps a lot, she sleeps all over her s/o

she falls asleep on their lap, shoulders, stomach i feel like she’s a really sleepy girl

☆ likes hearing her s/o’s stories and adventures

she likes giving her input and opinions

☆ wears ur hoodies maybe bcs she likes the smell, maybe bcs their comfier, maybe bcs she likes bugging you

☆ gets flustered when you even show that you think abt her

☆ actually anything you do makes her flustered deep down

☆ takes turns w u giving back massages

☆ forcefully takes you w her to the gym

you don’t even have to work out but she still wants you there

☆ she lets you touch her abs, even though she finds it odd

~

♡ she’s more dominant BUT she can be more subby depending on how she’s feeling

♡ loud

♡ likes scissoring

♡ when she is feeling submissive she likes when her s/o eats her out

♡ owns a good amount of sex toys, she bought them really for you

♡ very great stamina

♡ can last a few rounds before getting overstimulated and tired

mikasa:

☆ little spoon when sleeping

☆ very introverted even with her s/o

☆ likes quite and secluded dates, like a picnic

☆ likes when you take photos of her but she doesn’t like for the whole world to see them

☆ makes things for her s/o

something as small as cookies or as big as a crocheted sweater

☆ type of gf who would share a milkshake willingly

☆ super cuddly and warm

☆ remembers lots of things abt you, some things you’d render “useless”

like you had a hamster named zunie in 5th grade

☆ has a playlist of songs that make her think of u

☆ let’s you pick out her outfits sometimes

☆ keeps all the plushies you’ve ever bought her

~

♡ sub

♡ whimpers and whines

♡ holds you very tightly

♡ sometimes she lowkey gets all somber and sad during sex whispering stuff like “please don’t leave me ever”

♡ sex is very intimate w her

♡ squirter

♡ when she is giving to her s/o she literally eats pussy like a starved woman

sasha:

☆ naggy loud gf

it’s very sweet though

☆ shows her s/o a lot of love…. a lot

she gives you wet kisses and blows raspberries into your tummy

☆ you guys alr know she likes dates at restaurants but i feel like she’d also like people watching, feeding ducks, or the movies. she likes fun stuff

☆ never a dull moment with her

☆ sleeps wildly, sometimes you just gotta sleep on the couch. she probably snores too.

☆ she’s the type to post all pictures of you for the world to see. ALL

☆ makes slideshows on stuff like why she thinks you guys should buy a roomba

☆ forces u to do couplely things like match outfits

☆ buys corny cards for holidays

“you’re purrfecf for me! love, sash”

☆ play wrestles

takes it way too far. she jumps off the couch and tries to body slam you

☆ if you have bigger boobs just know she’s not gonna leave em alone

she lies on them to sleep and she always just touches them and gropes them

she makes “jokes” about you breastfeeding her and calling you mommy (it’s not really a joke)

~ ♡ def calls you mommy in bed regardless of chest size

♡ with all the eating she does she’s gotta be able to eat pussy

♡ vv whiny

♡ sub

♡ cant last longer than around 2 minutes

♡ will literally touch herself right next to u in bed while you’re sleep

♡ puts whipped cream on your body and licks and eats it off

.

a/n: i am SO sorry this took so long, i literally got stuck and was gonna try and make this one super duper long but i gave up on it and finished it last .°(ಗдಗ。)° . i hope u enjoy it n’ if there’s another character u wanna see u can request it! <333

[rowaelinsdaughter]

Can I request no a Rowan fic I absolutely love the last one you did

dont feel pressured tho and write whenever you feel like please put yourself fist

Can I request one where reader has like very bad health and is also like low on all vitamins and is super low on iron like and bc of that she has all these side effects and feels like a burden like she is holding him back and ruining his life and maybe make her like super sick she gets a fever and stuff

I’m mainly self projecting on this one a bit bc im super sick and need a rowan fic and him to just take care of me😭😭 i be lacking in all vitamins ti lol

And please add lots of rowan you can never have to much rowan like he takes care of her snd just pampers her and gives her little kisses and stufd and just the full princess treatment and him just being him like love rowan

SICK

a/n;; i had to do some research for the sintoms but i think it turned out good, so, here you have!!

WARNINGS;; low iron, dizzy, fatigue, burden feelings

her body was aching, her head was dizzy and she was extremely fatigued. she hasn’t felt this way in a very long time, always checking her iron levels and the vitamin levels were normal, but when last night she started to feel tired and her face was pale, she knew something was going to happen. and it did.

rowan had awoken because her hands were cold as ice, something not normal in her, but when he heard her fast heartbeat… he knew what was happening. he had a meeting that morning, but he didn’t care. his mate was suffering, and by the way she was feeling, rowan kicked out graviel the moment he appeared at their door. 

slowly opening the door, making sure he didn’t pour the food, he made his way to his mate.

“babe” he whispered. she moved a little, slowly waking up from her nap “i have the food, come on” she opened her eyes, and rowan felt his heart ache a little at the sight of his suffering mate. before she could incorporate, rowan was lifting her to his lap, his back on the board and an arm around her fragile figure. 

“i feel like a burden…” barely a whisper. 

rowan frowned at that, lifting the fork to her. “why do you think that?”

chewing slowly, he waited  for her to finish. “because you were… supposed to have a meeting… but you are here…” she took a breath. “ i don't like it rowan…”

leaving the fork on the plate, his hand moved to her cheek. “you are not a burden. you are my mate, i dont feel obligated to have to take care of you and will never feel obligated. i love you, that will never change, sick or healthy” a tear “hey, don't cry” a low laugh from him. 

“it's your fault, rowan for saying things like that when i'm at my lowest”

“well, good thing i'm here for lift you when you are at your lowest”

“seriously rowan, stop” 

rowan laughed a little harder, lifting the fork again to her. once she finished all the food, rowan covered her again in the bed and he finished the house tasks. when he finished, he laid down beside her. her face and lips less pale but the fatigue was still present on her factions, laying on their sides, rowan started to leave small kisses on her face, a small laugh falling from her lips.

“ro, stop please, it tickles” he laid his weight on her, trying not to crush her, and started tickling her. crying for him to stop, she was trying to push him apart, but it was impossible. “ro, please!!” another laugh from her was enough for him to stop. 

he laid beside her watching his mate trying to catch some air. she looked at him and punched him in the arm. “i hate you rowan whitethorn” “no, you don’t” side by side, they watched each other and rowan thought he might die from this. from the love for his mate, from watching her everyday and thinking that he was the luckiest person in the world.

“thank you rowan”

“for what?”

“for loving me and for taking care of me”

“always, angel. always”

all rights reserved to ©rowaelinsdaughter. no tranlations allowed. no copy theme. don not copy my work.

tagging;; @shadowdaddies @hellwantfuckme @danikamariemain @thehighladywrites @loneliestluvr @throneofsapphics

[cowboybarzy]

NYC, Mat Barazl

You’re first vacation together. You’re nervous because you don’t like to fly. However, Mat doesn’t know this bc you’ve never flown together. You start to panic at take off ( you can go from there) you eventually make it your destination (somewhere tropical) and then you can go into as much or little detail as you would like. I hope this makes sense.

tysm for the request! I actually also am terrified to fly and one time this old lady next to me held my hand for takeoff and landing and it was super sweet!

word count: 1.3k

come along the world trip

📍bali, indonesia with mat barzal

"At this moment, we'd like to invite the first class and business class passengers to board the aircraft." Your boyfriend next to you stood, collecting his things. You couldn't stand up, nervously looking around the airport and out the window at the other airplanes in the sky. You hated flying. You didn't do it often and the few other times you did you always had panic attacks. The idea of being suspended in the air and having no control left you panicked the entire time and once turbulence were added, all you wanted to do was run.

"Babe, that's us," Mat said, waving a hand in front of you to get your attention. "I don't get to take a vacation often but when I do, I do it right."

You snapped out of your panicking and gave a small laugh while gathering your things. "Still asleep?," he asked jokingly, to which you nodded. You had to get up very early to leave for the airport and catch your flight and due to your discomfort about flying, you had barely slept that night.

You were able to board quickly and get comfortable in your extra specious seats. Maybe with this extra room you wouldn't feel as cramped and scared.

"You okay?," Mat asked after a while and leaned over his seat ledge to see you better, when he noticed your leg shaking and that you barley answered him in the last few minutes.

"Yeah!" You tried to sound enthusiastic, but failed. "I'm just excited."

"Me, too." He kissed you. "Sand, sun, ocean, you in a bikini. Yeah, this is gonna be good."

You had no doubt about that. It was just getting to Bali that freaked you out and made you consider staying home. But it was your first vacation with him and the pictures you had seen of Bali looked absolutely amazing, so you just had to bite the bullet. Everything would be fine.

Once everyone was on board, it was finally time to leave. Your heartbeat increased dramatically when the plane started moving. Your hands gripped together tightly and your eyes shut tightly, too, turned away from your boyfriend. But that didn't stop him from noticing something was wrong.

"Hey!" He leaned over to your side again and placed his big hand on top of both of yours that were pulling at each other. "What's wrong?"

You couldn't ignore him any longer, so you turned to face him reluctantly. "I hate flying." Your voice was barely a whisper, hating to admit your fear.

"Oh, love." He tried to figure out how to pull you into his arms, but the first class seats were not designed for that. So he settled for his other hand that gently curled around the side of your face and caressed your cheek. "Why didn't you tell me?" You shrugged and in that moment the plane started speeding up, getting enough speed to take off. You shut your eyes again and your entire body went rigid. "It's ok. You're ok." He was able to kiss your forehead before being pushed back into his own seat. His hands stilled cradled you, definitely helping you get through it and once the plane settled in the air you could feel your heartbeat slow a bit.

"Better?" You slowly opened your eyes and looked directly into his green ones. You had fallen in love with them the first time you saw them and were amazed at how well they could calm you. You nodded, actually meaning it as your body began to relax a bit. As long as you didn't look out the window or there wouldn't be any turbulence, you could do this.

"Why didn't you tell me?," he asked again, gently. "We could have gone somewhere else that doesn't require flying or at least somewhere we wouldn't have to take multiple planes and fly for a day."

"No, it's ok. I have to get over this fear. And you got so excited talking about Bali, I didn't want to say no. I wanna go on this trip with you." He smiled when you did and softly placed his lips on yours.

"I love you. But next time please tell me about something big like this." You both laughed. "Honestly, we could have just gone down to Florida. Or even stayed on Long Island. They have beaches there I could see you walking around in a bikini in. That's all I need." You rolled your eyes.

"I promise. I want to see the wolf with you, though. Just don't let go of my hand." And he didn't. For the entirety of the flight, minus meal time, he held on to your hand and even when he dozed off he squeezed it every once in a while, letting you know that everything was going to be alright and that he was always by your side.

The rest of your travels wasn't any different. Takeoff and landing were still hard for you, but the actual flight was fairly smooth. You had a good book with you and the movie selection was great so there were a lot of distractions. Mat also kept you occupied and distracted which you were very thankful for. However, the flying anxiety prevented you from sleeping all day, even during your layover you barely slept a couple of hours. So when you finally, finally, made it to your private little villa right on the water, you crashed in bed almost immediately. You slept for hours and hours, now that the anxiety was gone and when you woke up, you felt like a brand new person.

"Morning, sleepy head." Mat, shirtless by the way, saw you stretch from outside and came walking into the bedroom. He climbed on the bed and laid down right on top of you. His lips started wandering along your cheeks and neck. "Sleep good?"

You nodded and rubbed your eyes again. "What time is it?"

"Almost six. At night." He grinned. If you remembered correctly you had gotten there at eight in the morning. "But I didn't want to wake you. You really needed the sleep."

Your arms wrapped around him, pulling him in first for a kiss and then a hug. Wordlessly, you stayed in bed like this for a while until you had woken up enough.

"Hungry?"

"Starving." Your little villa was part of a resort so Mat ordered room service and while you waited you took a little tour of the place and changed into a new outfit. It was basically one open room, which half walls separating the bathroom from the bedroom and from the living area with a small kitchen. On the deck was an outdoor shower, another sitting area and of course the pool from which you could jump right into the ocean.

"This is so beautiful." You we're standing on the deck looking out into the ocean where the sun was slowly starting to set. You leaned into your boyfriend who came to stand behind you and wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Worth the travel and flying?"

"Absolutely." He kissed your cheek and enjoyed the peaceful moment between the two of you.

After your meal, Mat practically changed you into your bikini himself and then carried you into the pool. The hot tub definitely got used a bit more though and that outdoor shower also got its first use of your stay...

[hotbellepepaz]

I made an inside out au!! Plz help me bc it’s my first time making an au so if it just sounds like a crappy retelling of the second movie I really do apologize 😔 anyways here it is!! Don’t be afraid to criticize it bc I came up with it all as I went so I will revise it and all lmao

Baking Memories!

In this AU, Joy, Sadness, Fear, Disgust and Anger run a bakery cafe called Baking Memories, a very popular one in their community at that. They have built a successful reputation as a lively cafe where it's ok to eat your feelings out. Despite not being experts in consultation, they've changed many people's lives for the better. Everything was going incredibly smoothly, until three new hires arrive. The OG crew were super excited for them to join the bakery, but soon notice something's off. Anxiety, the first new hire, slowly starts to insert herself into almost everything the OG crew does, and while she's undoubtedly super helpful, she starts taking over the whole bakery, alongside fellow new hires Ennui and Embarrassment. Now, kicked out of the bakery, Joy, Sadness, Fear, Disgust and Anger must figure out how to both revert the bakery to its old beloved state and snap Anxiety out of the control freak mindset she's unhealthily indulged in.

(more under the cut)

CHARACTERS

OG CREW

JOY

The founder and co-owner of Baking Memories! When she was little, she loved eating her grandmother's baked goods. They always made any bad day good and any good day great. When she grew older, she had dreams of sharing these treats with the world and bringing people together. That's when her grandmother gave her a cookbook with recipes to almost every sweet treat she made for Joy. A little while after being given this cookbook, she and Sadness finally opened Baking Memories.

When it comes to handling customers, Joy will always strive to deliver the most pleasant and welcoming experience possible. That means even on her most miserable day, she will still keep a positive attitude and a smile. Sadness appreciates this much dedication, but still wants her to have a breather and let her feelings out everyday during breaks, but Joy feels like this will only slow her down. She loves the bakery so much, and so will do anything to protect and care for it and its patrons.

SADNESS

Co-owns Baking Memories with Joy. They have both been good friends (and, actually, the only friend Joy has had,) and would often come over to Joy's grandmother's house to eat these elusively delicious treats. She always felt sad, so these were the magical band-aid she always needed. When Joy asked her to open a bakery with her, she agreed mostly because she thought the whole concept could actually cure the rather moody town of Imagina.

Customers and patrons of Baking Memories love Sadness for one reason: she resonates and connects with them in a way nobody else can do it. She's kind, sweet, soft-spoken and comforting. Her personality and the delicious baked goods make for one heck of a combo. Sure, she sometimes cries during her job, but she gets things done, even though she doesn't feel great. Doing basic chores like cleaning the floor and tables actually calm her, and boost her overall mood.

FEAR

The first crew member of Baking Memories. He actually came into Joy and Sadness' awareness a little later. Joy and Sadness opened a small Baking Memories pop-up at a school fair, and he and Disgust were drawn to the delectable scent of the baked treats. As he took a bite of a croissant, he was suddenly transported to a dream. He loved the taste so much, he actually fainted! The scene was horrendous at first, but it afterwards was hilarious. It also gave Joy and Sadness insight to how the general public reacted to their baked goods. Afterwards, he desperately wanted to join the duo's bakery to see how these treats were made. He loved it all!

Fear is very much a "fight or flight" type of guy. If a customer is giving him attitude, he will either take action and handle it himself, or just get someone else to do it.

Preferably Disgust or Anger. Customers love how he's unintentionally funny, and some even come from miles to this bakery just to get served by him! Joy can sometimes distract him from working and therefore makes many mistakes in orders. But he will do complimentary redo's if your order ends up a little wonky!

DISGUST

Crew member and marketing manager of Baking Memories. Met Joy and Sadness the same way Fear did, through the school fair booth. Taking a bite into the custard croissant she got, she felt so much lighter. She wrote about this heavenly experience on her blog, and boy, did it blow up. She then gained utter respect and even a little envy for the duo and applied to be their marketing manager. She did have to pay the price of becoming a full on employee and take care of chores, which does drag her but is still content.

Disgust hates doing chores with a burning passion, but despite that loves her job. She will comment on a lot of people's outfits (opinions may vary) and always come up with exciting new events, deals and campaigns. Each one drawing crowds up to hundreds! A lot of patrons especially note that if Disgust wasn't working here, they wouldn't have become the bakery that they are today.

ANGER

Crew member of Baking Memories. He was actually the very first customer of the shop, and came right after quitting his former job. He came in with such a temper, desperately needing coffee to at least tame himself. The whole crew had to handle him by gathering around him ready to extinguish his rage. After seeing how much help they truly needed, he offered to join them to help handle the bakery.

Anger loves customers who are on the same level as him. He gets who they are, what they need, and why they need it so much. Think of it as attacking back with the same weapon. However, even the mildest irritating customer can set him off. So much, someone who is the complete opposite like Joy would have no choice but to step in before things get worse.

NEW HIRES

ANXIETY

Newest crew member of Baking Memories. As a young woman, Anxiety had so much to juggle, and yet still managed to take care of it all. When she found out about Baking Memories, she wanted to try it so bad (mostly because of Ennui). The treats were extremely delicious, and their coffee was top-notch! She loved everything about it... until she was done. After her experience, Anxiety felt that 5 people working in a bakery that serves tens of thousands of people each week sounded overwhelming, and since she needed a job so badly, she figured she could fix it up a little...

When hired, Joy immediately displayed Anxiety as the ideal crew member. She was genuinely shocked when she saw her take great care of everything on her list of chores, and all in an instant! Joy definitely wanted her to be a role model for everyone else, especially the other new hires. However, Anxiety felt like she wasn't doing enough to keep up this fine establishment. She then decided to create new treats and completely rebrand the whole bakery. She then was so dedicated to creating the New Baking Memories that she might've gone a bit over her head...

ENNUI

Second new crew member of Baking Memories. Unlike her friend and roommate Anxiety, she showed little to no interest in working at the bakery. Sure, the baked goods were tasty as heck, out she would rather lay on the couch in their apartment than do manual labor. Unfortunately, Anxiety dragged her alongside to apply for the job, so she's just here... I guess.

"Miss IDGAF" is literally Ennui's nickname (from Disgust, alongside "Wee-wee" by Joy), especially considering that when she mans the register, she's just on her phone.

Somehow, she still gets orders through, but no one knows how she even does that. If her phone dies or is taken away, she goes into instant panic mode. Which is pretty much why she almost despises days when Envy tags along with Disgust to work. Envy can get very much drawn to it, and so she must protect it at all costs. Or maybe not.

EMBARRASSMENT

Third new crew member of Baking Memories. He's not the type of guy to stand out like the others, but rather blend in. It's always why he will forever never go out without his hoodie. It helps him feel "invisible" to the public. But when around people he can trust, like Envy and Sadness, he brings out his true personality. He's gentle, kind and compassionate, just like Sadness. In fact, Sadness hired him at Baking Memories just so he can practice socializing with people.

Embarrassment is scared to death of talking directly to strangers, so Sadness is helping him ease his way up the ladder of the workforce. As he works in the kitchen, where nobody can really pay attention to him, he gets things done. Not as much as Anxiety can, which he does wish he could. If your order came out slowly, it was most likely that Embarrassment made it. He's still a work in progress, just like everyone else.

ENVY (not an employee)

Disgust's little sister. After moving back to Imagina with her mom to live nearby Disgust, she heard about her job at Baking Memories and immediately begged to tag along with her. She loves going with Disgust every week to see and admire her big sis, and eat yummy desserts while she's at it. She also likes sneaking out Ennui's phone to watch makeup videos. Ennui still has no idea how she does it, so she's extra protective of it, but she still doesn't care either.

When Anxiety joins the bakery, Envy grows a close bond with her, and since then they've been best friends. She inevitably starts to admire and look up to Anxiety, and offers her help marketing the joint, just like Disgust. She thinks Anxiety's rebranding plan is amazing, but kinda wishes that she didn't kick out the OG crew, especially considering Disgust is out and the only people who know how to manage the bakery.

thanks for reading my crap and feedback is super appreciated :D alr byeee

[lunarlivs]

Ohh am I late for Sleepover Saturday? It's technically Saturday in my time again so I hope we're still good haha

Let's see:

FMK the big three, James, Sirius n Remus

3 things you love about Remus that you don't get to see often in fanfic/media representation

you are NEVER late for sleepover saturday!! it’s actually a 24/7 event here ^-^ thanks for asking!

god…. i actually thought of this for so so long and each answer leaves me hurt, but this is the one i feel most good about (and sorry for the long explanations)

marry: remus, because i think about marrying him every day every hour every second, i love that man and i think us living together would work. also i think that means we’d fuck and yes i am very much yes okay yes. james would make a better wife but rems is just my number one

fuck: sirius. i mean, i gotta fuck the hottest and prettiest person to ever have lived right? i think he’d be just a fantastic partner and if me and rem are already married we all can d- *get run over by a car*

which unfortunately means i’d kill: james >_< i love him but games the game sorry baby, next time i’ll marry and impregn- *gets run over by the same car again*

also THANKS FOR ASKING ABOUT REMUS you don’t know how happy it makes me to talk about him <33333 (also idk what you count as not seeing often but these are what popped into my head)

remus being a genuine LOSER. i mean, he’s very much accepted it and is content with it, but he is such a loser and a nerd. yes he’s got that secret charm of a brilliant mind and lovely brown eyes but to most people he is a man with bad posture and star wars stickers on his shitty computer, who wears the same jumper five days in a row and doesn’t remember how to talk to people. he is shy and kind and thoughtful but also the most awkward person you’ll ever meet and not in a good way. his hobbies include reading awful complex books about history, smoking on the parking lot behind his barista job where he is an absolutely bitch, crouching under doorways, saying ”actually” and correcting people who didn’t ask for it, and admiring sirius from afar (they’re still gonna fall in love obvi bc that certain something about his sad dude charm just pierces right through sirius’s though heart)

i love beefy remus. not necessarily muscular but just big, meaning tall and hairy and a soft stomach and thighs like treetrunks… you get the vibe, him and i are new acquaintances but love love love him

remus’s family dynamics can be super super interesting, idk if this is a rare thing but maybe just mostly something i’ve been thinking abour lately. him and hope being each others best friends (again to add to the loser part) and so similar in how they treat other people. she’s shown him how to make a house a home, they bake and cook together a lot, hope read him all the storybooks she could find when he was small. i love lyall being a nerdy funny old man who works with animals (or magical creatures) and loves nothing more than being out in nature with his family. they go on hikes with both of their backpacks filled with books and snack, they look at plants and animals and lyall keeps blabbering on whilest remus is just happy to be with his dad. in a world where remus has lycanthropy i love him teaching remus how to be with the wolf, and how to love himself though it all.

[nickeverdeen]

could you perhaps do an arcane caitlyn x autsitc reader having a really bad day bc of sensory issues? curious to see your take on how she would handle that (ik it's not super specific, sorry)

It’s okay, don’t worry!

———————

Save Heaven | Caitlyn x Autistic!Reader

Summary: Despite having a bad day due to your sensory issues your girlfriend always knows how to make it better

Pairings: Caitlyn Kiramman x autistic!fem!reader (romantic)

Warnings: None

—————————

The day had started like any other, but by noon, everything felt like it was spiraling out of control. The noise of Piltover, usually just a backdrop to your day, seemed louder, harsher. The hum of machinery, the chatter of people, and the occasional blaring horn of a passing vehicle felt like they were drilling into your skull. The bustling city, once so familiar, now felt like an assault on your senses.

You had tried to keep going, to push through the overwhelming noise, the glaring lights, and the constant pressure of people brushing past you. But it was too much. Your head was pounding, your skin felt like it was on fire, and every sound felt like a personal attack.

When you finally made it home, you felt like you were hanging on by a thread. The moment you stepped inside, you closed the door behind you, leaning against it as you squeezed your eyes shut. The apartment was quiet, but even the faint ticking of the clock on the wall felt too loud. You quickly kicked off your shoes, the feeling of them on your feet unbearable, and headed to your room in search of some kind of relief.

You curled up on the bed, pulling the blankets over your head as you tried to block out the world. But the sensory overload had already taken its toll, and the feeling of the fabric against your skin, the stuffiness of the air, everything—it was all too much. A frustrated groan escaped your lips as you curled into a tighter ball, feeling utterly trapped in your own skin.

The door creaked open softly, and you flinched at the sound, even though you knew who it was. Caitlyn was the only one with a key, and she’d said she’d come by after her shift ended. You heard her soft footsteps approaching, the bed dipping slightly as she sat down beside you.

“Hey,” she said gently, her voice a soft balm to your frayed nerves. “I’m here.”

You didn’t move, didn’t respond, but you felt her hand on your back, warm and reassuring. It was a touch that you usually welcomed, but right now, everything was too much. Still, Caitlyn didn’t push. She never did.

“I’m sorry,” you finally whispered, your voice barely audible beneath the covers. “I just… I can’t today.”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Caitlyn replied, her voice steady and soothing. “It’s okay, love. I’m here for you.”

Slowly, you pushed the blanket down, just enough to peek out and see her. Her blue eyes were filled with concern, but there was no pity there, no frustration—just love and understanding. She smiled softly at you, her hand still resting lightly on your back, not pressing, just letting you know she was there.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked, her voice gentle.

You shook your head, not trusting yourself to speak. The words were there, but trying to put them together felt like too much right now. Instead, you just looked at her, hoping she could understand what you couldn’t say.

Caitlyn nodded, as if she could hear the thoughts swirling in your mind. “How about we just sit here for a bit? No talking, no pressure.”

You nodded again, feeling a wave of relief wash over you. Caitlyn shifted on the bed, leaning back against the headboard and opening her arms slightly. You hesitated for a moment, but then you moved closer, resting your head on her shoulder as she wrapped her arms around you.

The scent of her perfume, something soft and floral, filled your senses, and you focused on that, letting it ground you. Her hand rubbed small circles on your back, the rhythm steady and calming, and gradually, you felt the tension in your body begin to ease.

The noise of the city was still there, faint through the walls, but it didn’t feel as overwhelming with Caitlyn by your side. The ticking clock was still annoying, but it wasn’t unbearable. Slowly, the world began to feel less hostile, less overwhelming.

Caitlyn didn’t say anything, just held you, her presence a constant comfort. You felt your breathing begin to even out, the tightness in your chest loosening. It was still a bad day, still heavy and hard, but Caitlyn made it bearable. She made you feel safe.

After a while, Caitlyn spoke again, her voice low. “Would you like to take a bath? I can make it nice and quiet, just for you.”

The thought of warm water, of the quiet, calm atmosphere of the bathroom, sounded like heaven. You nodded against her shoulder, and she pressed a soft kiss to your temple before gently helping you up.

She led you to the bathroom, and you watched as she ran the water, making sure it was just the right temperature. She added a few drops of lavender oil, the scent relaxing and familiar, before turning back to you with a small smile.

“I’ll be right outside if you need me,” she said, her hand brushing yours before she left you alone.

You sank into the tub, the warm water immediately soothing your sore muscles. The lavender scent filled the room, calming your mind, and you let out a long breath as you finally felt yourself start to relax.

It took some time, but eventually, the sensory overload began to fade, leaving you feeling calmer, more grounded. When you were ready, you got out of the tub, drying off and slipping into the soft clothes Caitlyn had left out for you.

When you stepped back into the bedroom, Caitlyn was waiting, her smile warm and welcoming. She held out a hand to you, and you took it, letting her guide you back to bed.

She settled in beside you, her arms open once more, and you didn’t hesitate to curl up against her. The world outside might still be too much, but in Caitlyn’s arms, you knew you’d always have a safe haven. And for now, that was enough.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

oooof ask for hozier recs and i shall deliver!! i've been obsessed with him i fear...

my personal rn is probably Too Sweet, but my most played song of 2023 was All Things End. beautifully moving (as in i was sobbing for the entire song the first time i heard it), i just adore the way he describes love.

more personal favorites: Through Me (this song is insane actually!! can't describe it with words.), From Eden (one of the best love songs i've ever heard), Angel of Small Death (soo insanely addictive, his voice in this one ugh) and Movement (soft and beautiful and the very first song of his that I heard). The Eat Your Young EP is a wonder in itself but tbh so is everything else,,,,

now for some specifically sugu coded songs: Through Me and All Things End, Who We Are from his last album (the lyrics... my days the lyrics are so beautiful), Blood Upon the Snow!! (written for God of War Ragnarok, it's so good ??), Almost (Sweet Music) (be still my foolish heart, don't ruin this on me ✊😔)

but like i said, every time i hear a Hozier song it's sugu coded in my head... the lyrics always make sense to me. the way they're always so poetically romantic, yet in many of them there's a lingering pain underneath, wether it's because the love is already gone or because the love is simply way too much for just one heart to handle... i'm not okay.

fun fact, i once fell asleep listening to him and dreamt that it was suguru singing... and you know what it makes so much sense, i'll take it.

this got kinda long i'm sorry :(( anyways i hope you have a great day/night

(perhaps i shall write a lil' sugu thing inspired by too sweet)

NOE !!!! finally getting to this……. thank you so much for the recs!!! 🥺🥺 i appreciate it sm…… putting some of my thoughts under the cut hehe

I LOVE TOO SWEET . SO MUCH. it was the first song of his i listened to and wowwwwwww does it go hard….. so catchy and good and just. augh. IT’S SO SUGUCODED TO ME…. esp depression era sugu….. the lyrics are just gorgeous and so him. “but while in this world // i think i’ll take my whiskey neat // my coffee black and my bed at three // you’re too sweet for me”…. :’3 my baby

FROM EDEN IS SUCH A BOP . i loveee the instrumental ……. AND THE LYRICS . ”honey you’re familiar like my mirror years ago // idealism sits in prison, chivalry fell on its sword” <- BANGERRRR I CRIED . i am thinking many knight sugu thoughts ngl…. “i slithered here from eden just to sit outside your door” THINKING MORE SUGU THOUGHTS but specifically cult leader sugu …. aughhh 😔😔

angel of small death & the codeine scene……… tell me why this one made me so insane . such a tasty title and instrumental and lyrics i’m just????? i feel this way abt all of these but this one is so sugucoded too 😭 “freshly disowned in some frozen devotion”…. that’s our guy <333

EAT YOUR YOUNG IS SO CRAZY GOOD OUGHH….. i love love loveeee the “seven new ways that you can eat your young” part 😵‍💫😵‍💫 soso addicting. the lyrics are great and his voice is just soooo……. i don’t even know . i’m a little obsessed . “it’s quicker and easier to eat your young”…….. hhhhhhhhHH very sugucoded too ofc . any mention of eating is automatically a sugu reference 🙏

movement is super catchy !!!!! kinda relaxing too…… very soft. i rlly like the chorus :33 gives me waltz vibes…… kinda haunting…….

all things end + through me are soso pretty!!!! goshhhh his voice is nice……. i love the final part of all things end!!! w the synchronized clapping!!!!! so good …. and the lyrics for through me are so tasty . “with each grave, i think of loss // and i can only think of you // and i couldn’t measure it”…….. nomnom

ohhhhhh who we are is so beautiful :(((( his voice sounds so tender ….. i def get the sugu vibes here too!!!!! the feeling of something important slipping through your fingers …. “this phantom life, it sharpens like an image // but it sharpens like a knife” 😵‍💫😵‍💫 vert tasty . very sugu.

I’VE HEARD BLOOD UPON THE SNOW BEFORE BC OF RAGNAROK….. godddd it’s so. chillingly beautiful. the instrumental scratches my brain just right …… and the LYRICS . “too all things housed in her silence // nature offers a violence”….. “the parent forced to eat its young before i grows”…… it’s very . Raw . i like it a lot :3

AND FINALLY….. almost (sweet music). SO GOOD. i adore this instrumental and vibe so much + the lyrics are obv super pretty….. “i laugh like me again — she laughs like you”…… i love how light this one sounds in comparison to some of the other ones!!! a summer song for sure… a lil bittersweet….. and the chorus is literally SO addicting i can’t stand it……. BUT YES THIS ONE IS SO VERY SUGU. NOE. IM TEARING UP 😭😭 “be still my foolish heart // don’t ruin this on me”…. the idea of sugu thinking this…. maybe an au where he slowly recovers after his almost-defection….. or a childhood friends to lovers au…… i dunno. but my brain is spinning. i love him :(((((((

PHEWWW THOSE WERE GOOD . i love his voice sm….. i think my favs out of these options are too sweet, almost (sweet song), from eden and maybeeee angel of sweet death/eat your young…. but they were all super catchy :’3 thank you sm for these recs noe… sugu has invaded my brain

[whoslaurapalmer]

hopefully you don’t still have a sinus headache!

recently, i’ve been thinking about baby bea getting to go to normal school and making non-vfd friends her own age, and violet, klaus and sunny having messy complicated feelings and fears about this but mostly being very happy for her.

yes!! thankfully i am now sinus headache FREEEEE

and!!!! AAAAAAAA YES..........

i think sunny and babybea both get to go to normal school and they have like, similar but, different struggles re: interacting with people at school. sunny purposely distances herself from her classmates for a long time bc she's Going Through It when she and her siblings come back from the island and before they find babybea, like there's a lot of mystery around this girl who just showed up and she heavily encourages the mystery bc she doesn't have the patience to deal with anybody while she's trying to fit back into the world, her life, trying to find her sister, trying to figure out what she remembers of the past and what she doesn't. (i am team 'sunny remembers the events of canon physically more than she actually truly remember-remembers them, but remembers the island the best.' do we have metaphorical teams for how much sunny remembers of canon?) i think she.......feels like she has to contend with the legacy of not only lemony's books but geraldine's punctilio articles, more than violet and klaus. ANYWAY. all this to say, in the nature of children, certain kids have a real laser focus on kids they think are Weird Or Different and sunny fits both of those things and she's definitely 1) been in a few fights bc she reacts physically 2) grabbed a kid's arm and bit him. it was not a pleasant parent-teacher conference for violet. by high school she's probably a little better. they have babybea back and have created the extended baudelaire family unit and i think she feels a little more secure in the world. as secure as a fourteen year old can feel...........................she gets encouraged to take the culinary elective in high school.

sunny, with deep-seated certainty, while using a ruler and an enormous knife to cut petit fours in the kitchen: can't teach me anything i don't know.

but she takes it anyway. she enjoys it greatly and does, in fact, learn new things. she makes some friends.

ANYWAY. YES. BABYBEA. she's spent so much time alone, and she's good at it. she enjoys it. but she really wants friends she just doesn't quite know how to do it. she's very close to her family, and she loves them more than anyone else, but she'd like to be close to other people her own age too, it's just not something that comes very naturally to her. but she LOVES school and she really likes being around people. her interests are just. not. necessarily. aligned. with her classmates. babybea herself has been in a vfd school, after all, along with all the Lemony Snicket Was Briefly Her Guardian While Helping Her Find Her Family And I Am Sure That Was A Real Time shenanigans. she does find it easier to talk to the adults (plus sunny) in her life and it's hard for her. clearly they encourage it bc As Adults they are aware, theoretically, It Is Good For A Child To Have A Super Normal Upbringing That DOESN'T Involve, Say, Scaling A Mountain For Reasons (even though literally every single one of them has scaled a fucking mountain. babybea included.), but yeah, there ARE complicated messy feelings!!!! violet and klaus didn't really get to finish their education the way they should've. lemony and the sbg were entrenched in vfd. sunny is, see previous paragraphs. i guess it's a lot of heightened parenting emotions. is your child safe at school vs is the small child you have guardianship over safe at school and TOTALLY not going to be, say, kidnapped by the ankle one random day. are the people your children knows people they're going to be safe with? normal parenting fears vs a vfd fear. sigh. and it's not like violet and klaus easily get along with the parents of babybea's classmates bc they aren't her parents. they're siblings and they're babybea's Family. there's things they can talk about but there's still a real disconnect, you know?

meanwhile babybea is just going 'have you seen [black and white movie of your choice]??' and her classmates are going '............no??' sigh, again.

but i think she wants to join band!!!!!!! oh.....babybea as a little band kid.................so i think she learns the accordion from lemony, and either the school system she's in is That Weird (as some are) that they need an accordion or, she plays the clarinet. god she's probably drum major in high school i'm sobbing. that's precious. also babybea is like permanently 10-13ish in my head bc otherwise i get upset about the passage of time bc she's BABY goddammit so it hurts to think about her as any older than that but let's think of her as drum major in the far, far distant future.

anyway anyway band is great for her!! a lot of the other kids in her year look up to her bc she develops a wide music (and music theory) knowledge and they go to her for help a lot and she's so thrilled and so pleased and that's how she really starts interacting with other kids. eventually they talk about more than just music, but one must start somewhere. the first time she goes over a friend's house is Harrowing for the adults, but they survive. but babybea's friends LOVE going to her house bc the baudelaire household feels very comforting and homey. nothing beats a friend's homey house and violet and klaus' spirited (if minorly overbearing bc they love babybea) hospitality. they also think sunny is super cool. (everybody has a crush on sunny. she almost gets concerned about it, but she is the coolest.)

babybea's friends: your sister is THE COOLEST babybea: she's not my sister, she's my family? babybea's friends: so, like, your sister babybea: no! just. family. babybea's friends: then who's that guy lemony: ? babybea: that's my uncle. babybea's friends: so why is sunny not your sister? babybea: because!

oh! so babybea starts a book club. her friends suggest it bc the baudelaire family library is so big and has so many books and so many fun places to read, that she and her friends have a lot of fun hanging out and reading books. lemony takes the news with deep horror and trepidation. but it all works out okay. the worst the book club gets is like, a bunch of kids arguing about who gets to be which character in each book they get obsessed with. which can be vicious enough, you know. sometimes babybea gets them to sit down and watch an old movie. occasionally, in the spirit of all good book clubs, they get pizza.

[sammisafetypin]

im enabling you rn. karin for the ask meme plssss

ollie please tell me what dis image is . anyways KARIN TIME💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛

Sexuality Headcanon: Karin has never thought about her sexuality once in her life. She has been MUCH too busy to think or care about it and if you asked her she’d interrogate you about why you care so much. Would call herself straight if you twisted her arm for an answer, but the gender section below kinda complicates that response.

Gender Headcanon: Deeply hard-boiled egg, would be a he/she trans man if there was, once again, any time to think about it. He goes on about how all of her issues with being a woman are because “men get so many more opportunities anyway”, and it’s “only natural to wish you were a man for strategic purposes”. He is not figuring this shit out without intervention, the denial goes to the ocean floor at this point.

A ship I have with said character: (RIPS MY SHIRT OFF TO REVEAL THAT I HAVE TATTOOED TEH WORDS ‘I 💛 DAARIN’ INTO MY CHEST)

No but seriously. I don’t care how much of a popular Reddit ship they are, their dynamic is literally perfect. Karin’s constant charging ahead VS Daan’s inherently passive nature and how they don’t understand the other person’s way of approaching life is already great, but the way they bicker is even better. It wouldn’t be nearly as interesting if Daan didn’t snap back, but he does and it makes them SO funny. I also think, despite their dynamic being predicated on being such opposites, they have the most potential to actually deeply understand each other — the less you get someone, the more you want to, and so they both kinda dig their heels into “why are you LIKE this” until it becomes “oh ok. I see. you’re still fucking annoying though >:/“. I have a hard time verbalizing why I like them so much but I just really do, they’re a bickering old married couple to me that has never actually dated, Daan just kind of became Karin’s “person” one day and he carries him around like a particularly mean purse dog.

A BROTP I have with said character: Her and Abella! In my first playthrough my party for most of the game was Karin, Daan, and Abella, so I got really attached to them as a trio. I think Abella is kind of immune to Karin’s bullshit and able to just thwack her on the head when she’s getting ass-deep in her stubbornness. Doesn’t always work, but Abella’s determined to try and get her to unwind a little bit.

A NOTP I have with said character: I don’t like Karin/Pav at all, though I’ve only seen a small handful of people ship it. I just don’t think Karin would ever feel anything but homicidal rage for Pav, much less romantic affection. I know I just went on about how much I like the conflict of Karin/Daan, but it’s different. Those two have banter, Karin and Pav is like, “I actively believe you to be a fucking pig”. Y’know? Also Pav pisses me off for literally no reason so that doesn’t help.

A random headcanon: She LOVES documentaries, and I mean love love LOVESSS documentaries. She’s such an old man about them she wants to sit down and watch his stories about World War 1 and loudly eviscerate every detail he disagrees with. Daan who would rather be watching the ‘40s equivalent of trash TV can’t stand this. When he has his shows on Karin complains but inevitably gets invested anyways. Her opinions on the Toddlers & Tiaras moms have to be known.

General Opinion over said character: KARINNNNNN MY SWEET BOY MY SUGAR PLUM!!!!!!! I loveeeeee Karin he was teh first character I beat teh game with which made me super attached to her already, but besides that shez just a great character that doesn’t get nearly enough respect in dis fandom. Do you know how many Karin centric fics dere are on Ao3?? Not enough, I’ll tell you! And itz bizarre to me bc she’z so interesting! I think she gets kinda discarded as th token bitch of th cast but if All Of That had happened to me I think I would be kind of a paranoid stubborn cunt too! Her backstory’s like actively horrifying to me it surprises me I don’t see it talked about more. But anyways Karin is my SPECIAL BOY WHO I LOVE SOOOOO MUCHES I MADE HER ATTACK GOD WITH A MEAT MALLET 

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it’s been such a busy year!! but i wanted to write out some accomplishments just as a reminder to myself about some good things that have happened between the mess

i cooked 3 new dinner recipes!! (very big for me as someone who doesn’t cook)

i baked banana bread for the first time from scratch!! (also massive for me as someone who only bakes boxed mixes)

i started doing yoga more regularly (at least once a week!! that’s been so good for the body and brain)

i’ve finished crochet projects (coasters, granny squares, more coasters)

i’ve tried writing fic again (just little blurbs that don’t see the light of day but it’s been nice to write out the little prompts i have in my head)

i had a really good class i taught this semester and they were so talkative and willing to share their ideas!!

i did three conferences this year for papers i wrote and presented them in panels of other super cool people with super cool papers

i’m becoming more comfortable with being alone with myself (not much!! but baby steps are still steps)

i’m getting more comfortable with driving and am starting to even enjoy it!! actively seeking it out!! that’s never happened before!!

i’m learning to understand my own value and recognize that my sense of self-worth is wrong— that i’m more than my successes and failures just by living and trying new things and not limiting myself (again!! baby steps but steps forward)

and i’m learning that i am valuable and worthy of basic things (love, respect, objects, time, etc. a concept!! but we’re learning)

reframing things to have a positive mindset!! i’m not indecisive. i’m taking time trying to make a thoughtful and informed decision. i’m not a failure. i’m just trying something for the first time and learning to enjoy the process

i’m finding something that makes me smile each day!! at least one thing, every day, to share with a friend or savor a moment for myself even if it’s as small as going for a little walk rather than immediately going from point A to point B (and not seeing that as a hassle!! it’s an unexpected adventure or a new routine to have!! reframing things has been helpful)

journalling more!! oh my god i haven’t journaled regularly in a g e s but it’s been so nice to journal about some good things in my life or, if scary/bad/overwhelming things are happening, then taking some time to write out and tackle some of those stresses to make them more manageable

not! suffering! in! silence! (this is still a wip but!! we’re learning to just. talk to people! reach out! i’m still bad at starting and maintaining conversations bc i get overwhelmed easily, but im trying to be better about trusting that people know their boundaries and limits and what they have the time/energy/capacity to handle in that moment or later on. aka!! unlearning this idea that i’m a burden to everyone and everything around me. i’m just me!! and people care about me. and i need to trust that this is true. and learn to believe it)

eating fruit regularly— this sounds silly but holy shit. eating at least one fruit a day?? life changing

i started therapy!! and then fell off but that was still big!! and a new experience for me

the power of a candle— the power of a little bright light and good smell in the space around you?? immense

i started a little tradition where i get new piercings on my birthday to celebrate the day and we’re feeling!! so much more comfortable in our own skin these days

and maybe there’s more but!! these have been really big and important moments for me that i want to remember having— and maybe remind myself of for a rainy day

there’s good in this world and i hope that— if anyone is reading this— that you also are experiencing some good things in your life or learning to see things as a good and valuable and important, too!!