#i started watching b99 and peraltiago is my fucking life

[xadiasecrets]

Modern AU!Rayllum Wedding

Rayla: But I do have some bad news. There's a bomb at this wedding.

Callum: what-

Rayla: Your butt. Your butt is the bomb. There will be no survivors.

Callum, on the verge of tears: i love you so much-

[amyscascadingtabs]

this is sappy but whatever. i wrote most of this before the season started (which is why i come off as reasonable and somewhat mentally stable about all of this) but felt appropriate to post it now as a thank you. ❤️

i have vivid memories from the night b99 was cancelled. the news came late evening my time, and i had been editing fic and checked twitter and there it was. loud and clear. i don’t remember which site it was but the picture was jake and amy with their wedding cake and that made everything feel even worse.

i remember freaking out even though i had been prepared, because those last days before the news hit on tumblr were... panicked. but i still freaked out to the extent that i ran outside in my pajama pants and hoodie and blue plastic slippers and called my mom, and then i walked up and down the streets where i lived in the darkness and cried in frustration as she tried to talk me down. i remember there were random guys with motorcycles out? but i was too hysterical to care. i’m pretty sure i screamed something to my mom about ”HOW CAN BIG BANG THEORY GET A BILLION SEASONS BUT THIS SHOW GETS CANCELLED????”

i know everyone who was in the fandom at the time has their cancellation story. what played the biggest part in mine was the fact that i felt like i hadn’t had enough time. really, i had only just become active in the fandom, only just started interacting with people on here and writing my first few fics, but i was absolutely loving it. it was giving me happiness again after a long period of emptiness and depressive feelings. when it was cancelled, what made me feel the worst was the fact that i’d had so little time – to make friends, write fic and react to episodes together. i felt deeply jealous of everyone who’d gotten more.

thinking about it coming to an end now has made me remember that night and those feelings of jealousy. because i did get more time. i got three more years. that night, i remember asking for just one, for a half, for anything, and i got three years.

and these three years have been a whirlwind of emotions and feelings and episodes and debates and discussions and gifsets and fanfic and asks and having this as my safe space while pretty much everything changed around me in the outside world, and i just want you all to know that i have never taken a single day of them for granted. this show could have been taken from me before i’d ever gotten the chance to grow with it and alongside it, and instead it was part of my life for three whole years.

i have a really, really good memory (four time quiz champion anyone? just me?okay <3), and i remember so much of it in such detail, and it's so weird to think about how long it's been when it also feels like yesterday.

i remember my first comment on peraltiago parenting experience, my first episode-related fic, the insane high after the renewal, staying up all night to watch the wedding live. i remember writing fanfiction on the beach while on vacation in greece, on a plane to berlin, at home on my parents balcony late late at night. i remember the honeymoon episode title being released, s6 starting filming again, the excitement over every little piece of news and finding about the cast directing. i remember labor fic and christmas fics and when i scroll back to pictures of my paris trip in january 2019 it's interspersed with a billion pictures of andy at the golden globes. i remember lighting my fairy lights in my little basement room and watching season 6 in bed at 2.30 am if it was a big episode, and watching it in the morning before fridays in high school most days. i remember writing post-ep fics during classes and on my phone on subways and trains. i remember the s7 news, and the casecation nerves and debates, and fucking kissgate. being named "the class amy santiago" by my friends when we graduated and getting a little silver paper plate to show for it. i remember the first fic exchange and inventing julian and simon santiago and i remember meeting @johnny-and-dora and eating wagamamas in manchester and talking about how simon santiago was DEFINITELY on the stairs and buying a little fake plant that i named andy plantberg (he's still in a box somewhere). i remember writing fic during slow hours in the ice cream shop i worked at. moving and putting up my framed b99 poster in my own apartment (very much still up). finding out about trying and everyone going fucking crazy. infertility fic. melissa's pregnancy news. s7 promo and standing outside my job the very first day and texting siân "AMY HAS TO PEE!!!!!???" because that was in the promo and we knew there were pregnancy tests involved in the first episode. the crazy happiness of s7 finally premiering. everyone going crazy about jake and amy deciding to start trying and how i could quote the scene verbatim the next few days. the week leading up to trying, what turned out to be the last normal week before the pandemic. the fucking MESS i was after that. the following week and ding dong and crying with happiness. being dizzy with hyperfixation joy the following day and barely feeling aware of the covid pandemic for the first few days because i was just thinking about jake and amy having a baby. getting through the first few weeks mostly because of b99. admiral peralta and finding out we were having a BOY and not even being disappointed even though the headcanon had been the opposite for years because it was perfect. the iconic b99 quizzes. lights out and mac being born. somehow managing 475 days before season 8, coping together when we got the news about the final season, watching the cast do their final day of filming. the first stream being interrupted by a storm warning and cutting out several minutes because of course. getting to see parents peraltiago and MAC and the insane speed with which those few seconds were giffed. more b99 quizzes. the vow renewal. the finale.

i remember all of it and so much more and as much as my heart is breaking, i’m trying to remind myself that i could have gotten none of this.

brooklyn nine-nine has been such an important part of my life. and it always, always will be, forever. i could have lost it all that night, and instead i got three more years. if i'd known that when i was walking the streets outside my house in the darkness in complete panic, i would have cried with happiness.

so thank you. all of you. for everything. ❤️❤️❤️ for the friendships, the joy, the asks, the debates, the fic response, EVERYTHING. whether we've shared three years or one or less, just know that i'm so grateful.

have some random pictures i found and screenshots from my private instagram (which is inactive so don't bother) from when i started this hyperfixation. jesus lmao 😭😭😭😭 i am less insane now. no i'm not. but i express it less on instagram.

[johnlock-hell-resident]

OTP Game

as used by @mercheswan

1. Johnlock (Sherlock)

2. Snowbaz (Carry On)

3. BrewerRose, aka David Rose x Patrick Brewer (Schitt's Creek)

4. Tedlexis (Schitt's Creek)

5. Hophie (The School for Good and Evil)

6. Tiana x Naveen (Disney's The Princess and the Frog)

7. Peraltiago (Brooklyn 99)

8. Sci-Set (Equestria Girls)

9. Tagatha (The School for Good and Evil)

10. Raymond Holt x Kevin Cosner (Brooklyn 99)

If any of these otps are part of fandoms you have not finished, TURN BACK THERE ARE SPOILERS

1. Do you remember the first episode/scene/chapter when you first started shipping 6?

Well, it was before I transformed into my fandom self so I didnt have the good sense to remember the occasion lol

2. Have you ever read fanfic for #2?

Yes! Not as much as I'd like, but YES! My favorite of the few is Lonely in London by banjjakbanjjak

3. Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/phone background?

Nope, that honor goes to Johnlock~

4. If 7 were to suddenly break up today, what would your reaction be?

I would retire the show full-stop 😭

5. Why is 1 so important?

Honestly, I have no idea. I have no idea why this ship of all ships is my chosen one but here we are. I think its just that the writing and thematic experience of BBC Sherlock is unlike any I've seen before. It has literally everything I could ever want in a love story and John and Sherlock, even if it's platonic, have an unconditional, soulmate bond. And let's not forget what I need for every ship: MUTUAL PINING AND TENSION

6. Is 9 a funny ship or a serious ship?

Very serious. 😑 this is my serious face

7. Out of all the ships, which one has the most chemistry?

Snowbaz I think

8. Out of all the ships, which one has the strongest bond?

Johnlock, without a doubt

9. How many times have you read/watched 10's fandom?

I'm actually still not done watching B99...

ILL GET TO IT OKAY

10. Which ship has lasted the longest?

I dont know if this means in fandom history??? Or the relationship in real time? Or for me personally??

Me personally? Johnlock, would you believe

11. How many times, if ever, have 6 broken up?

If you count the brief misunderstanding with Tiana witnessing "Naveen" and Charlotte's wedding, 1

12. If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, who would survive? 2 or 8?

Snowbaz absolutely! In one corner we've got magickal teenage warriors and in the other corner we've got... magical teenage warriors ok but this one is limited in the confinements of PG

13. Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship?

I cant remember the specifics but they had to keep their blooming relationship a secret bc their nasty boss threatened to fire them unless they broke up

14. Is 4 still together?

15. Is 10 canon?

Now and forever!!

16. If all 10 couples were entered into a couple's Hunger Games, which couple would win?

By far my favorite question. Johnlock would get pretty far I think bc Sherlock could outthink all of them and John can repair any of his injuries (having a doctor on your team is such an op advantage). Snowbaz has the power of magick and flight on their side BUT Baz is incredibly flammable. BrewerRose and Tedlexis would be the first ones to die. Naveen and Tiana go next. Hophie is the sinnamon roll couple so I think they're combined ruthlessness would carry them to the top. Peraltiago and #10 both have experience as cops so they would at least know how to adapt to the ever changing situation. Sci-Set have magic but they wouldn't have the ethical flexibility to commit any kind of harm. Tagatha have magic as well, but they cant stop arguing literally to save their life

In conclusion, Hophie seems like the obvious winner. They are trained villains after all

17. Has anybody ever tried to sabotage 5's relationship?

Fucking Nicola

18. Which ship would you defend to death and beyond?

Johnlock till I die

19. Do you spend hours a day on 3's tumblr page?

I would if there was any fan content!!!!

20. If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the 10 ships to break up forever or else she'd break them all up forever, which ship would you sink?

I mean #4 is already sunk so 😔

BUT if I could sacrifice another ship in return for #4's relationship it would be Sci-Set

[letitrainasunnyday]

Of all the series you watch, ShinRan is your favorite couple, or is there another couple that you like more?

I watch A LOT of series. And I love A LOT of couples.

Monica and Chandler from Friends, for instance, are ultimate couple goals. Castle and Beckett from Castle will always have a soft spot in my heart despite everything, and so will Captain Swan from OUAT. I would straight up die for Sakura and Syaoran from Cardcaptor Sakura, and I have laughed and cried rivers for Troy and Abed (in the moooooorning). Peraltiago from B99 own my entire fucking ass. Chihiro and Haku, Jim and Pam, Leslie and Ben, Han and Leia, Eleven and Clara, Fitzsimmons, Rebel Captain, Mulder and Scully. 

Hell, Heiji and Kazuha are always at the top of any ship list I ever come up with. 

But to me, these are characters from shows. I met them as characters, and I got to know them as characters, and, to many of them, I said goodbye as characters. 

Shinichi and Ran, somehow, go beyond that. 

I’ve said this many times but, bear in mind that I have been living and breathing next to them for more than 20 years of my life. I have talked about them, thought about them, written about them, dreamed about them, made friends because of them every day for more than 20 years. 

There comes a point where these characters stop being characters and start becoming a part of you. They start becoming friends, family, people you trust. People you feel you know better than you know yourself. 

I know it sounds crazy. Borderline psychotic, even. I know. But if you’ve ever spent so much time with characters, you’ll understand. 

So yes. Out of everyone, out of everything, ShinRan always prevails. Because they will always be more than just some ship to me. 

[caatws]

oh, that's interesting. you and i interpreted the mixed race babies comment very differently. bc jake said "you said words" right after that comment and not the part where she asked about babies, and because amy's face when she said it was her Those Were Gross Words face that she's done lots, i only ever interpreted that as a addressing the mixed race comment, before amy launched into talking about kids. they maybe should have done a clearer condemnation, i guess, if it's open to interpretation?

anon, she was still talking very much abt babies - jake and amy’s babies, specifically - with the mixed race comment. to recap:

like, legit, the word “babies” is there. and the only reason jake and amy aren’t reacting to her “do you have kids?” line is bc pam cut in with this before they can speak. so, even if they’re just reacting to the “do you have kids?” line, that still means they completely skipped over this.

yeah, amy’s facial expression might’ve been about this - i hope it was - but that’s not enough to argue that the writing/narrative/characters actually condemned or disagreed with this comment. like i said before, i wanted so badly for them to engage with this and ultimately say Hey Let’s Not Talk About People’s Bodies In This Way.

like, i’m not sure y’all who are monoracial understand - i specifically started watching b99 for the interracial relationship representation of jake/amy. that was the sole reason i started watching this show. ofc, the show has done lots of other cool stuff for rep since then, but seeing as that was the core reason i started watching at all, i’d hope you would all understand how long i have been w a i t i n g for actual canon references to and portrayals of the interracial dynamic of jake and amy’s relationship, especially pertaining to their future children being mixed race! so for this to be the first mention of the latter at all in the show, i was very annoyed.

something like this shouldn’t be open to interpretation. no, i do not want to hear different interpretations of whether or not it’s cool to say generalizing comments like this lmfao. it’s annoying as fuck, and as those “adorable babies” grow up, it evolves into exoticism and sexualization of their bodies (i.e. “hapa asians are soooo hot!”) which inadvertently leads to impossible standards that we mixed ppl have to live up to to be “allowed” to exist. as long as we’re adorable babies, we’re valid. as long as we’re sexy and exotic, we’re valid.

and the amount of times i’ve had to sit through monoracial friends projecting these tropes onto real life mixed people at our school or in public, only for me to feel unattractive bc i know nobody is talking abt my mixed race body in this way - the fact that part of me wants monoracial ppl to to look at me and objectify me in that way bc it means my body is considered desirable or valid? - jesus christ.

when you write peraltiago babies, just know that if they ever actually existed irl, this may very well be their lived reality as mixed race ppl.

[bitchinlyras]

tagged by @storyinmyeyes! thanks hun!!

Pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions, don’t cheat. Tag 10 (or however many) people.

1. parks and rec

2. brooklyn nine nine

3. gilmore girls

4. stranger things

5. offspring

1. Who is your favourite character in 2?

my gal amy santiago!! i adore her!!!

2. Who is your least favourite character in 1?

that bitch marsha langman (but from the main cast... mark cos he’s boring lmao)

3. What is your favourite episode of 4?

ever!!! shit that’s hard bc it’s all so connected, ya know? the s3 finale rlly blew me away but i think the bathtub (1x07) is probably my favourite

4. What is your favourite season of 5?

season three hands down! a full season of nina and patrick! happy nina and patrick! angsty nina and patrick! moving in nina and patrick!

5. Who is your favourite couple in 3?

luke and lorelai!!!!!

6. Who is your favourite couple in 2?

peraltiago!!!! loves of my life!!!

7. What is your favourite episode of 1?

snake juice ofc!!!!

8. What is your favourite episode of 5?

s3 finale!!! it’s so fucking good and just makes me🥰🥰🥰

9. What is your favourite season of 2?

season 2!!

10. How long have you watched 1?

i binged the entire show in a week in 2015 (and then watched on a loop for the next 18 months)

11. How did you become interested in 3?

i just knew about it and my friends said i’d like it and it was on netflix!

12. Who is your favourite actor in 4?

umm i mean i adore the kids but also like winona ryder??

13. Which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5?

parks. the answer is always parks.

14. Which show have you seen more episodes of, 1 or 3 ?

honestly could not tell you. those are probably the two i’ve watched most. maybe parks cos i started it before? but i’ve watched them both SO MUCH

15. If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be?

like dustin or lucas bc none of their family/loves gets seriously injured/placed in danger/traumatised/killed

16. Would a crossover between 3 and 4 work?

LMAAOO IM TRYNA IMAGINE STRANGER THINGS IN STARS HOLLOW

(no it would not)

17. Pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple?

ann and april!

18. Overall, which show has the better storyline, 3 or 5?

uggghhg they both dooooo. honestly it depends on the season.

offspring has 5.5/7 seasons of good storylines, and gilmore has 6/8 seasons of good storylines so i think that means offspring has slightly better storylines??? idk maths

19. Which has the better theme music, 2 or 4?

stranger things is cool and all but the b99 theme just SLAPS

@bellamysgriffin @dmigod @kamekamelea @amyscascadingtabs @his-dark-memerials @millennial-mess

[disruptedvice]

Creator tag meme 2018

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc!) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2018. Tag as many writers/artists/etc as you want (fan or original!) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I was tagged by the lovely @startofamoment, and subsequently realized that I wrote over half of the fics I have on AO3 this year alone (67/109 total), so narrowing these down was fun. I joined new fandoms, so I had 3 OTPs that I mainly wrote for: peraltiago, starmora, thorkyrie (listed in the order I got into the fandom chronologically, of course) (and I just realized that even though I only chose one peraltiago fic, B99 is mentioned in three/four-ish of these reflections, so even if you only know me from one fandom, stick around, cause there’s a lot of cross pollination in these reflections)

Wedding Day -

As she sprinted through the fields, barefoot and free, it made her feel like a child again, racing through the fields of her home planet, because she had promised Mamma she would be home in time to help her with supper.

Her feet were dirty from playing outdoors all day, but, as green little toes pressed into the freshly tilled ground beneath her feet, she was fast, laughing like a wild child as she ran, confident that she’d make it in time to keep her promises.

This time, she had a different promise waiting for her.

It was a different ground beneath her, one she’d never been to before today, but running bare feet in the grass still felt good, just like she remembered. As she ran, long green toes were pressed into a soil that was a different color than she remembered, and her sprinting feet were long and sure as they pounded against the earth with the speed and grace of a gazelle in its natural habitat. Her feet were practiced now, balanced and efficient. This wasn’t the clumsy running of little feet slapping down with every step. This was quick, light, elegant movements, barely touching the ground before propelling into her next step, with long green toes covered in dirt of a foreign land.

Much had changed.

But she was still running and smiling like a wild child, racing home, because she had promises to keep.

If I had to pick an absolute favorite from this year, it would probably be this one, and the funny thing is it was almost never written at all. This was actually an anon prompt fic and kinda technically a starmora week fill. The prompt for day 6 was Wedding, and I made a self explanatory one shot titled Wedding Night

The day after I posted it, I received the anon ask “Starmora prompt: Peter and Gamora's wedding day.”

The thing is- I had no plans to ever write an actual wedding for them. I didn’t even have any ideas for what their wedding would look like when I got that prompt.

In an alternate reality that anon never sent that ask, and one of my favorite fics would have never even existed.

So really, to that anon, that you, because this is isn’t just one of my favorite fics of 2018, but one of my favorite fics I’ve ever written, so thank you for sparking it!

Whirlwind

The majority of my Brooklyn Nine Nine fics from this year were explicit peraltiago one shots, and this was no exception. Just the sex that immediately follows the decision to screw light and breezy on their second night. Kinda kinky, kinda awkward, kinda giggly, and definitely happy.

There’s a specific line in this fic that I love more than anything, and really don’t know why, just that I do.

Amy kissed him like finally and supposed to be.

Honestly, I think this is my favorite line of the year.

Like I just love the way it sounds, reading it aloud in my head. It just fits.

It’s always the best when people leave their favorite lines/parts in comments, and I’ve found that nothing pleases me like writing a mundane sort of detail and finding out that really made an impression on someone. There were a few specific lines left in the comments, but one comment really stood at to me, just in general and also cause of the line they chose:

She felt him stroking at her slicked up curls

Someone left a comment about just that line as a subtle detail being something they really liked. And I was like ‘huh, interesting’ because as far as just regular details go, I didn’t think anything of that line, and I had no idea how good it would feel in the center of my chest when someone left a comment on how much they loved what I just considered a regular sorta line

Healing

“There’s more to healing than what’s just physically necessary,” Val replied calmly, choosing to focus on treating and bandaging hand injuries rather than the weight behind her words. It’s a process, she thought, but didn’t say. She had a feeling he already knew.

Okay, so I actually got the term hand whump from a comment left on one of my older b99 fics, but it was so perfect the first time I read it cause like, that’s my favorite type of whump! I’m glad I’m not alone in being a sucker for hand injuries in the fanfic community. I don’t know what it is. Symbolism??? Maybe???

The first time I saw Thor Ragnarok, I was barely dipping my toes into the MCU fanfiction community with GOTG, so it wasn’t until I watched this movie again for the second time that I wrote my first Thorkyrie fic, cause, I mean, how could I not? How can you not just love everything about them?

Our Stories can Heal

“S’okay. I know this stuff is hard for you. Thanks for trusting me with that.”

Her heart swelled at that. There was a little ache at how he said that like it wasn't clearly just as hard for him, but mostly her heart felt warm and full.

“Thank you for being the kind of person I know I can trust,” she replied, and that earned her a chuckle.

This one is near and dear to my heart as a sexual abuse survivor myself- plus, I have a thing for badass couples supporting each other (can’t you tell from my OTPs?)

I pretty much wrote exclusively for B99 for almost three years, and while I love digging into emotional issues with a generous serving of comfort, I guess the most severe emotional issues I’d ever explored in a Peraltiago fic was Jake’s abandonment issues. While I’m clearly not opposed to exploring themes of support for traumatic experiences, I was never really able to do that until I had a ship that I could do that with in starmora.

It’s much easier for me to explore things like traumatic pasts in starmora fics because A: it’s canon that they both had traumatic childhoods with physical abuse and were both raised in just traumatic environments in general, and B: with pretty much every hurt/comfort fic I write (whether hand injuries or emotional issues) I like starting at the healing point.

With Peter and Gamora, the trauma already happened in the past, and I don’t have to establish it as an author (plus in the MCU meeting each other in the first movie and starting the Guardians of the Galaxy is where every member of the team’s life starts to get better). That’s all established canon.

If I were to write a soft peraltiago fic of  healthy relationships and emotional support involving past sexual abuse for either of them, I’d have to CREATE something in their backstories that led to that situation, and that’s just something that I honestly don’t wanna do.

I only have two starmora fics that touch on this, and tags for both of those are “implied/vaguely referenced past non-con” because I never actually state anything about it directly in the fics, and never go into what actually happened.

Seriously, in both fics, it’s impossible to tell if it was past CSA or if it was a past incident of sexual assault. That’s how vague it is. And I’m able to be that vague with it, because I don’t have to establish traumatic pasts, because their traumatic pasts are canon. Rather than having to create a trauma like I would have to if I wanted to explore these healing themes with peraltiago, with starmoa I just have to go sideways from what’s already canon, you know? (In Our Stories Can Heal they’ve both had vague past trauma, in this fic right here, Peter is the only one who’s had extremely vague past trauma- both are about healthy relationships and healing and emotional support)

The Hourglass Runs Out of Sand

Here is the exact summary for this

“You are always telling me that I am more than what I was made to do,” Gamora reminded him gently.

“Yeah, but you weren’t made for it,” Peter said, looking up at her with a sudden intensity she wasn’t ready for. The anguish in his eyes made her chest pang with a dull, resounding ache. “Your parents made you so you could be a kid, not a weapon. That’s what you were made for. To be a person. You weren’t supposed to be used to kill people or the entire universe. That’s not why you exist, not like me.”

(Or: Peter’s body isn’t reacting well to losing Ego’s light is one of the author’s favorite tropes)

This was such a self indulgent work of all my favorite tropes and themes. Emotional hurt/comfort? Check. Physical hurt/comfort? Check. Mutual comforting? Check.

I even put in the freakin’ summary that it’s written for my favorite tropes. So, I mean, of course it’s gotta make my top 5 of 2018

Plus, I actually had some fun working in ideas that I didn’t actually use, but still love as concepts.

And it was actually thanks to the comments on this fic from Wawa_Girl / @marypoppinswasmyfatherbitches that pushed this over into something extra special as an author.

She made a much better in depth analysis of this fic than I ever could, and her entire long ass comments on this fic made my entire fucking year

Like damn, you get yourself a cheerleader who leaves 2,000+ word comments on your fics, cause I got mine.

Here are just 3 subsections of her comments that meant the fucking world to me:

First of all, I love the very premise, the specific types of emotions and trauma Peter is going through here. It's twofold, and it's fascinating. 1) The idea that he was only "made" to be "used," discovering and contemplating and becoming self-loathing over the fact that the entire reason he was conceived was to be used to as a battery, a tool, a thing to help destroy the universe. WOW. That is a take I had never really considered, or at least never thought about for long. That would fuck anyone up, create serious identity problems, that at least on the side of his father, he was intentionally created for evil purposes, and not just to be a person. 2) Guilt over the thousands of innocent people he hurt while being used as a battery, although it was greatly out of his control. Because to someone who wants to be a hero and with such a big heart, the knowledge that he even involuntarily killed anyone through Ego's power is horrifying, to the point where the guilt is so high he feels he deserves any physical pain/illness/injury. Awww man, another take I would have never strongly considered. We've seen fanfics where Peter feels guilty in the aftermath of Ego, but it's usually in relation to how he treated the main characters (never appreciating Yondu or realizing he had a father all along; not listening to Gamora and yelling mean things to her during their fight; being too cocky and rude to Rocket in the beginning, overall wanting to be a better person/hero/boyfriend). NOT insane guilt over the strangers and planets he destroyed via Ego's light. Goddammit. :( This is the first time I've seen a fanfic address these two ideas. And it's realistic and creative and GOOD.

- How Gamora originally thought Peter "felt" the other children, his siblings dying, how seeing the bodies scared her for Peter's well-being so much, and how making Peter relive their deaths seemed like Ego's brand of sick, psychological torture. But also that Peter actually meant he felt the other strangers dying due to the expansion, scared and running away and being buried. Feeling that is horrifying, of course he would feel insane levels of guilt. The comparison that, despite Gamora's guilt over her victims under Thanos, she never felt them die, and not all at once but over the course of years. Again, great contrast. I still love her reminder "That wasn't you." That could never be Peter.

- Peter breaking down crying when Gamora says "Earth" instead of "Terra." That's so interesting, one of the most original concepts in this piece, how that slight name change would resonate with him so much. Fascinating. And heartbreaking. He held it together well, and that was the thing that broke the thread. Poor baby.”

If you’ve got anyone in your corner who builds you up like that, then you’re set for life, baby.

(I think that Gamora misinterpreting Peter’s statement and thinking he meant the other children when in fact he meant the people that died during the expansion is the example of working in ideas I didn’t actually use but just love as concepts)

And that last one kinda goes to the point I made in Whirlwind reflection about people liking what I thought of as regular/sorta mundane details- like obviously the part about Earth/Terra was supposed to be emotional and I wrote it that way on purpose, but I didn’t intend it to be even in the top 8 emotional hard hitting moments in this fic, so what she wrote about that little bit has always stuck with me

And turns out her favorite part was a last minute addition, which always makes me feel extra special, I don’t know why. Finding out that last minute inclusions are things that people loved just makes me glow

If you have a reader who sometimes gives you comments even half as good as marypoppinswasmyfatherbitches gives hers, then you too can consider yourself truly blessed (she writes freakin’ amazing starmora fics too, so she’s the kind of commenter I aspire to be as a fanfic writer, you know? If you don’t have your own marypoppinswasmyfatherbitches, you go be somebody else’s marypoppinswasmyfatherbitches. You go make somebody’s year just by being you)

I’ll be tagging @thehoneymoonbinder, @marypoppinswasmyfatherbitches, @ephemeralcontinuum, @nymphrea, and @startsrose3

Honorable mention for Falling, or the fic that made me realize that I have a pattern, and every time I have a new OTP, the first fic I post for them must be a pregnancy fic. First B99 fic? Peraltiago pregnancy one shot back in 2015.  Last February? Published my first GOTG fic, a starmora pregnancy one shot. Back in June? My first fic ever written for any of the Thor movies- Falling- a, you guessed it, Thorkyrie pregnancy one shot.

[ginkasei]

destielsolangelotrash:

1. Korrasami (Korra/Asami, LOK)

2. Malec (Magnus/Alec, Shadowhunters)

3. Hance (Hunk/Lance, VLD)

4. Rupphire (Ruby/Sapphire, SU)

5. Cophine (Cosima/Delphine, OB)

6. Cecilos (Cecil/Carlos, WTNV)

7. Pearlmethyst (Pearl/Amethyst, SU)

8. Peraltiago (Jake/Amy, B99)

9. Hollstein (Carmilla/Laura, Carmilla)

10. Theyna (Thalia/Reyna, PJO)

******These are just the first ones to come to mind! Although Korrasami is always number one in my heart.

1.    Do you remember the episode/scene/chapter that you first started shipping 6? Literally the first time Cecil mentions Carlos, I was like “OMG this could be good!” And then they fucking GOT MARRIED and I cried in my dorm’s dining room because of how amazing and happy and ugh. I’m a crybaby for good shit like Cecilos.

2.    Have you ever read a FanFiction about 2? Yeah, but not that much. The fanfic I’ve read is minimal tbh.

3.    Has a picture of 4 ever been your screen saver/profile picture/tumblr avatar? Yes! Garnet was my phone background for a while.

4.    If 7 were to suddenly break up today, what would your reaction be? They were never together ha h a h  a   a    .       .         .

5.    Why is 1 so important? I COULD GO ON FOR YEARS. Two women of color. Two bi women. Both getting over grief. Enemies to friends to lovers trope. THEY WERE MADE FUCKING CANON. I cry every time I watch the ending scene. They mean the world and more to me, and the comic gave me 10 years of life. I cannot fucking wait for the next one.

6.    Is 9 a funny ship or a serious ship? Oh, both. Like, they’re seriously into each other, but they also have fun.

7.    Out of all of your ships listed, which ship has the most chemistry? Peraltiago vs Rupphire. Garnet is almost always fused, but Jake and Amy are so in tune with each other.

8.    Out of all of the ships, which ship has the strongest bond? Korrasami of course. Obviously. Rupphire is a veeeery close second.

9.    How many times have you read/watched 10’s fandom? Once all the way through, though I want to reread the first series again.

10.  Which ship has lasted the longest? Cecilos! I started listening to WTNV within the first two months of it being released, so from the very beginning.

11.  How many times, if ever, has 6 broken up? Kind of once? When Carlos was trapped they were apart, but never actually.

12.  If the world was suddenly thrust into a zombie apocalypse, which ship would make it out alive, 2 or 8? Hmmmmmm. Malec because they have Magnus.

13.  Did 7 ever have to hide their relationship for any reason? I mean.... not canon. But in my heart they are.

14.  Is 4 still together? Always and forever.

15.  Is 10 canon? Fuck Rick, they’re lesbians.

16.  If all ten ships were put into a couple’s Hunger Games, which couple would win? Korra and Asami, the most Iconique power couple ever.

17.  Has anybody ever tried to sabotage 5’s ship? I mean, yeah, but not purposefully. Just..... DYAD and all that.

18.  Which ship would you defend to the death and beyond? Korrasami and Hance. They mean everything to me, since Korrasami is my number 1, and Hance is my unpopular/unaccepted ship.

19.  Do you spend hours a day going through 3’s tumblr page? Ummmmmm...... lowkey yes.

20.  If an evil witch descended from the sky and told you that you had to pick one of the ten ships to break up forever or else she’d break them all up forever, which ship would you sink? Rick already has it in his head that Reyna is A Straight so Theyna. Because at this point it’s a crackship.

Pick your top ten ships without looking at the questions…