#i started crying just THINKING about my dog

[szopopraczo]

Romantic love is not a solution.

The thing I don't like in most fandoms is pushing romantic love everywhere. I think this flattens some of the characters considerably, reducing them to just someone in love and wanting to be loved, while it's not truth.

Characters in bungo stray dogs are extensive and there is definitely more to them. They don't seek for romantic love. Platonic is a different thing. I always thought the point of bungo stray dogs is to tell the story of characters who are trying to find their place in the world. Stray dogs searching for a warm corner, where they can finally rest and not think about hunger for at least two minutes.

Bungo stray dogs characters don't think about romance. They're instantly fighting with their past and threats of everyday life (they have very fucked up life (wth is even going on in the manga??)). They have to understand and accept themselves first. Cause before you love someone else you have to love yourself first. The bungo stray dogs characters wouldn't be good partners.

It's simple yet some people still have problems understanding. I think there are two reasons why people tend to do it. First: it comes from the notion that when you are loved, all your problems will disappear. When we see a character we like a lot (it works even more when we relate to them) and see how much they're struggling, we want to give them a partner to make them happy. We like to write/read fanfics, draw/look at fanarts, make headcanons... We see this as a way to "fix" the characters. And this is connected to the second reason: society has ingrained in us the idea of being in a relationship as something completely mandatory that we simply cannot look at the world differently. When we see a character and we get to like them – start being interested in them – we start to search for a love interest to make them "complete". After all, how can such an amazing character end up single? (What's wrong with being single?)

Of course, I don't want to say ships are bad. Ships are cool. Fanfics are cool. Fanarts are cool. Headcanons are cool. It's just I don't think it's exactly healthy to make romantic feelings a point of everything. Bungo stray dogs has a lot more to offer. Real life too.

English is not my first language. Be nice to me or I'll cry.

[jieas]

thanks for the tag kyo !! ah how cute

im jea and i mainly spend my free time reading, writing, baking, or sleeping

i got into reading cuz a friend of mine was really into a book series/collection when we were younger, i was curious about why she liked it so much & started reading the books with her so we could talk about them together & eventually got into fanfiction during the pandemic. writing i got into also around the pandemic just to pass time since it was so boring. started baking since my mom was super into it & i got into it too

i don't think anything i've read or watched have left a big impression on me but i remember the movie a dogs purpose being the first movie to make me really cry & i've honestly never been the same after watching it all those years ago. as for books, i'd have to say city of ghosts by victoria schwab. it was the first paranormal novel i read, an introduction to a genre far different from the historical(?) fiction i was used to reading around that time

my music taste tends to change a lot and often, covering plenty of different genres, but currently i'm really into r&b & hip-hop/rap, especially japanese rap

my current favorite character would probably be hiragi from wind breaker, the bridge fight... yeah i still think about it constantly. also, the way he cares about others so much is just so cute to me. as for all time fav i'd say... deadpool, even if it's a little basic. i've been a fan of his character for as long as i can remember, even before i really knew him or watched any of the films. now, it's mainly cuz of his energy & flamboyance plus a hint of childhood nostalgia from seeing his little chibi face everywhere. there's more apart from those two but i just can't think of reasons why so

open tags !!

tag + q&a game ₊˚ෆ

hello! i thought it would be cute and exciting to do a tag game with all my mutuals to not only talk about themselves, but have fun! so here is my short little game:

alongside this picrew, share 5 things about yourself!

• how do you spend your free time? • what are your hobbies and how did you get into them? • what book or movie left a lasting impression on you? • what kind of music do you enjoy? • who is your favorite character (atm or all time) and why?

i will start first!

my name is rurumi and i enjoy spending my free time writing!

some of my hobbies (outside of writing) includes: drawing, building gundams and keyboards, and fashion! i got into most of them on a whim and became instantly hooked. aside from self-expression, being into fashion also helps with making friends in college because you always have something to talk about!

a book that left a lasting impression on me would have to be either kafka on the shore by haruki murakami or before the coffee gets cold by toshikazu kawaguchi. both stories have kept me up at night thinking a lot about the 'what ifs' in life.

i enjoy soul/r&b alongside anything of jrock influence, but i will basically listen to anything that sounds good. i am currently listening to 'so what' by lucy!

my favorite character at the moment is rin itoshi from blue lock because hes so ridiculously edgy, but at the same time i sympathize with him a lot. on the other hand, my favorite character of all time is suletta mecury from the witch from mercury series, she's an absolute ball of sunshine that i aspire to be.

tagging (+ no pressure) ₊˚ෆ

@kaiser1ns @naenaex0xx @shomatoriashi @choccorin @ryescapades

@rindreamery @soleillunne @kissxcore @rainswept @mitsvriii

anyone can join as well <3

[blueggrass]

i know theres not much of a fandom here for the will of the many but ,,,.., i just finished it and.,,,,, im in shambles. life is moving around me and I'm still in shock. I have things to do but i cant even think. what,, am i supposed to do. just go on? pretend im okay with this till the next one comes out??? I FEEL LIKE A ZOMBE. I FEEL LIKE NOTHING MATERS. ALL I FEEL IS-

i dont think ive ever been hit by a book hangover as much as this like wtf even was that /pos HELLO??? CAN ANYONE HEAR ME??? LKSJFLSKJBFLKSJBFLKSBFK:BSF:KBSF:KJBHSF:KJ

[kimetsu-chan]

I’m gonna be out most of the day bc I’ll be helping my dad with a big shopping trip plus being out after, so I’m going to be super duper exhausted

I don’t do well in crowded or loud places in the slightest, I get woozy and tired and I feel miserable or like I’m gonna pass out, and if the shopping isn’t gonna make me wanna cry, the outing after will bc it’s gonna be packed with lots of noise and people

I don’t say this because I want to complain, I just wanna give a super quick warning that I might not be active tomorrow as well as today bc when I get exhausted, my mental health tends to decline as well ;-;

so- a bit of a warning that I may poof a bit (sorry! 😣)

[not-poignant]

Hi Pia! You said that you need another vacation after this vacation, so I am not sure, how puppy situation, even if it partual custudy, affecting you ( may be you in panic when he is there and then recovering when he is not, and then round and round? ), but really, If you need another vacation, I hope you know we will be here to support you for it!

It's been nearly 4 weeks now since we got Toby so I feel like I can talk about this with a bit of a clear head.

(Talk of like an actual PTSD meltdown beneath the read-more, including self-harm mention - nothing graphic. There's zero obligation for anyone to read this, especially for folks who don't think authors should ever be honest about being people with issues):

So, I've been kind of quiet about aspects of this, but I have like severe treatment-resistant PTSD and C-PTSD, and puppies specifically are one of my triggers (especially if I'm responsible for them). The reason for that is kind of awful, and I don't really want to talk about some of the things I've experienced/been through that led to that, so let's just move onto the next part. You're kind of right anon, there has been panic while he is here lol.

As a result, I had a severe meltdown the first time I tried to adopt a dog many years ago now. Could not last 24 hours, needed weeks/months to recover.

But I've always wanted to share my life with a dog and I've been in a somewhat better space over the past year or so, and I thought I could maybe handle it better. I told myself 'if I can just get through that 24 hours I'll realise it's okay and it will all work out.' Anon I cannot tell you where this thinking came from, but it was wrong. Idk why past me was kind of naive enough to think this way but here we are.

No, after that 24 hours, it got temporarily better, and then I slammed into consecutive meltdowns, each one worse than the next, until the people around me were afraid for my life. I am still recovering from some of the harm I inflicted on myself during the last three weeks and likely will be for some time to come. The combination of a really intense PTSD relapse, as well as not being able to handle (as an AuDHD person) intense changes to my schedule basically compounded and I broke.

I made the decision to rehome Toby, and first contacted the people around me. Glen's mum said she wanted a dog, and had been specifically looking into dogs like Toby anyway, and so we decided this would be best because then I could still be involved (I love Toby to pieces).

After getting some space, I finally started to adjust, and have gone back to having Toby about 4~ days a week, with a view to going to about 6 days, with one day spent with my mum, or Glen's mum.

Today is the first day I was able to handle having him on my own for around 9.5 hours. And I'm here and able to write about it, so that's progress. He'll be here all day Sunday, and then Tues-Weds-Thurs-Friday. And from there a decision will be made as to where I'm at with my mental health etc.

I'm a bit more hopeful now that I might be able to keep him, but my PTSD is still very very bad. I'm having some nights where I'm simply not sleeping until 7.30am (even if he's not here), and my hypervigilance is crazy. Like, I am having so many auditory flashbacks it's stupid. So this is why I've been saying this break hasn't been very restful or productive. Because my mental health tanked like I detonated a landmine inside myself.

I didn't actually plan the two week break for Toby! That was just a coincidence honestly.

Unfortunately I have a lot of health conditions that respond very poorly to stress, so I'm dealing with those now too. And then additionally, in all of this, I had a breast scan / mammogram / ultrasound that has confirmed a suspicious lump I found a couple of months ago (breast cancer runs in the family), and I suspect I'm going to need a biopsy. I'll find out on Monday if that's the case. That's been in the background and hasn't been helping.

There's some other stuff going on that's not really worth talking about because these are the main things, but that's a good picture I think. It turns out 'just getting through the first 24 hours' doesn't magically make a severe PTSD trigger go away. And that forced exposure is not 'exposure therapy' - that's just reinforcing a trigger.

Anyway! I feel like I'm through the worst of it, and I am seeing glimpses of how my life could be richer if I keep getting through this. But...that's why I think another break. *smiles tiredly.* I have to wait a bit now for the PTSD / C-PTSD symptoms to settle down, and I also need to see what's kind of worsened after this. Realistically, with a relapse to this degree, it could take between 3-6 months to really start recovering, or to at least get back to where I was before December.

I hope with all my heart I can get there with Toby by my side. I love him so much.

(I want to add that Toby has never ever been in a position of harm at any point, and in fact I probably put myself in harm's way for his sake, because I wanted to provide solid continuity of care - in case anyone was worried about that).

Er so yeah! But I've picked up my writing again this week and have been able to do some like...things I'd been neglecting, and I feel more human again, I just hope I get some sleep tonight

[whentherewerebicycles]

I cannot survive this day lol

[yuichiroswife]

{ I know me saying this doesn't matter since I'm barely here to begin with, but I likely won't be here for a while because my dad just asked me how I felt about getting a puppy that my sister keeps trying to talk my mom into and I hysterically bursted into tears due to me remembering the way our previous dogs died. It obviously had a much bigger impact on me than most thought and now I'm just terrified to have any new pets because I literally cannot handle them dying. }

[luthifer]

i already got angry abt this to my sister but ive been watching a lot of animal videos lately because period happened and i always want to cry on my period and since i can't do that normally I HAVE to watch things to make me cry or i'll just sit there vaguely uncomfortable and it gives me headaches

Anyways, the fact that there are some people who "love" an animal for years just abandon it when they move away. What the fuck is wrong with you. Not even bringing it to a shelter of any type, not bothering to look for a home for the pet you've had for years,,,, you just leave it abandoned on the street or in an empty house????

[fitsinthepalm]

it’s kind of wild that you don’t realize how depressed you were until you start feeling better

[panzershrike-pretz]

Guess the fuck who started their morning with a panic attack

[ghostoffuturespast]

A sheaf of sweetgrass, bound at the end and divided into thirds, is ready to braid. In braiding sweetgrass-so that it is smooth, glossy, and worthy of the gift-a certain amount of tension is needed. As any little girl with tight braids will tell you, you have to pull a bit. Of course you can do it yourself-by tying one end to a chair, or by holding it in your teeth and braiding backward away from yourself-but the sweetest way is to have someone else hold the end so that you pull gently against each other, all the while leaning in, head to head, chatting and laughing, watching each other's hands, one holding steady while the other shifts the slim bundles over one another, each in its turn. Linked by sweetgrass, there is reciprocity between you, linked by sweetgrass, the holder as vital as the braider. The braid becomes finer and thinner as you near the end, until you're braiding individual blades of grass, and then you tie it off. Will you hold the end of the bundle while I braid? Hands joined by grass, can we bend our heads together and make a braid to honor the earth? And then I'll hold it for you, while you braid, too.

All flourishing is mutual.

Braiding Sweetgrass - Robin Wall Kimmerer

[nobodybetterlookatme]

I've never heard of emts working only at events? What's that like for you if you don't mind my asking?

Yeah, there are ambulance companies that staff certain events, but there's some event specific companies out there lmao. For me specifically, it's almost entirely college events, whether it's happening on a campus or not. It's not great, usually pretty boring, but it's better than being on an ambulance or in a hospital. We do get actual emergencies sometimes, but usually it's just getting drunk people to the tent or giving out water and bandaids lmao. Again, boring as fuck, but I chose this over working on a 911 rig, so that's on me 😔 if I'm being so real tho, other than my coworkers, the best part of the job is the food lmaoooo it's so good and all the food trucks/food booths give discounts or free food to us depending on the location and event. And there's almost always a ton of downtime, so I basically just get paid to sit there and vibe for the most part

[medusa-was-innocent]

Wow this sucks

[bootyful-seventeen]

i am too mentally exhausted to even deal with this shit anymore with my mom and grandma and low key wish i'd go comatose for a few years to be left alone tbh

[deprivedofbraincellsandsleep]

and loving you was easy, it was you leaving that scarred

[reflectionsofgalaxies]

god, grief hits you at the weirdest fucking times