#i start remembering old shit and crying to myself

[whatdoidosatoru]

crybaby

farmer x sebastian (stardew valley) wc: 1.4k it's raining and you're crying in sebastian's spot. that's it, that's the plot. cw: smoking, general feeling of inadequacy

“shit,” the water splashed as my feet came down on the surface repeatedly. “shit shit shit SHIT!” rubbing my hands over my tear-stained face, i kept disturbing the ocean, sitting on the end of the deserted pier in the rain throwing a tantrum like a child, very unlike what a ‘functional adult’ is expected to do. “FUCK!”

i let out my frustration, days of held-back emotions because ya gotta keep on truckin’... at least that’s what my dad had started saying when i’d call home in anger and despair, venting about how i must be useless, how my crops aren’t growing the way they should, how the damn crows just picked apart my most successful plant, how i don’t have time to shower, and not to mention eat proper food. ya gotta keep on truckin’ - fuck you, i don’t even have a truck.

“you think you’re gonna be here long or…?”

the sudden question caught me off guard, coming from an unfamiliar male voice. with the damn rain muffling every and any noise, i didn’t even hear the footsteps coming from behind me.

i sniffled, lowering my hands to grip the edge of the pier, contemplating just pushing myself off into the moody ocean, letting the current take me wherever, just far enough away from this life i’m messing up.

“i dunno.”

my voice cracked as i turned my head to the side to confirm my guess, the figure standing slightly behind me was none other than the town’s moody loner. at least that’s what i’d heard from some people. some name starting with an ‘s’.

my answer to his question didn’t seem to deter him, instead of leaving me to at least keep some of my leftover dignity, he stepped forward, coming more into my line of vision before sitting down beside me, his legs dangling off the edge just like mine.

i thought about introducing myself, but i doubted i could string together a coherent sentence without sobbing. nevertheless, i opened my mouth, ready to embarrass myself by whining out my name, but he just kept looking out into the horizon.

“i’m-” “i know.”

the abruptness of his words cutting me off shocked me enough to stop crying. my brows furrowed and my feet stopped splashing into the water while i gathered my thoughts.

he simply kept looking out, now taking a cigarette from his pocket and lighting it while holding a hand over the end, keeping the flame from being extinguished by the slight breeze and the drizzle. i shook my head when he offered me a cigarette, so his hand was quick to put the pack into his pocket again so it didn’t get wet.

the smoke was almost enchanting as it came out of his mouth and i had to force myself to look ahead, for the love of yoba, don’t stare at his lips. i tried again, this time clearing my throat before attempting to at least pretend to be civil.

“you di-” “we don’t have to talk, just shut up and enjoy the weather.”

this time his words made me close my mouth instantly. i couldn’t remember the last time i was spoken to like that. back home, everyone wore their fake smiles, they called you sweetie, said ‘no worries’ way too much, and expected the same in return.

even here, where everyone knew my grandpa, i was only a replacement for the old farmer. a failing replacement. a whole set of expectations already placed on my shoulders before i even stepped onto Pelican Town soil.

i took the time to steady my breathing, to stop these fat tears streaming down my reddened cheeks. after several minutes of silence only broken by the soft noise of raindrops meeting the surface of the water, i took a few deeper breaths and turned my head to the side again, this time letting myself look over his features in the least obvious way i could manage.

“so…” i started, giving him a second to interrupt me again, “do i have to look for a new crying spot?”

the perfectly raised eyebrow used to respond to my, admittedly stupid, line was nearly enough to make me choke on my own tongue. his face showed very little other than slight annoyance, probably at having ‘his spot’ taken by a messy-haired crybaby with stupid muddy overalls and dirt under their nails.

despite the sour expression, i had to admit to myself that he had a pretty face, along with a tempting set of lips that looked soft as they housed that nearly finished cigarette between them. he swore under his breath, lifting his lighter again to relight the end, trying to finish those last few drags before stubbing it out.

that last stream of smoke changed directions, now blowing towards me for a moment, a sure sign that he turned his head to look at me… or at least in my direction.

his voice carried a little less irritation than before, but he still didn’t sound too friendly.

“depends. you plan on crying a lot?”

i snorted. i actually snorted, immediately feeling mortified at myself and covering my mouth, in utter disbelief at myself. from the corner of my eye i saw his lips twitch, like he was a little proud of himself for my reaction.

though still a bit shaky, my voice seemed to be coming out fine, no stutters, no breaking.

“can’t say i have it in my calendar.”

and just like that, a pleasant silence envelops the air around us. he lit another cigarette, offering me one from the pack again to which i shook my head, instead picking up my feet from the water, sitting cross-legged.

the sky didn’t clear and the rain started coming down a little harder now. my hair was sticking to my forehead, doing the same to him though he didn’t seem to mind it. if anything, he looked right at home with darker spots of raindrops on the shoulders of his hoodie and his long side-swept fringe dripping with water.

the rain suited him.

he smoked another cigarette, stubbing it on the dark planks of the pier before putting the end into a small tin that i hadn't noticed before. it disappeared from my sight back into his pocket.

despite not needing to speak, i still felt a little odd not knowing his name.

sam had mentioned it, they were best friends, but much like a lot of things the rest of the townspeople had said through overcheerful smiles, it seemed to have vanished from my memory. i gave my throat a little hum before speaking with a pointed question in my tone.

“so uhm…” “sebastian.” “right.”

i couldn't cry next to him, but somehow it didn't feel suffocating. it wasn't weighing on me. i could breathe. so i pulled a wrinkled tissue out of my pocket and wiped my nose, clearing my throat a few more times before settling with my fingers absentmindedly tracing the stitching of my overalls.

sebastian was still looking out into the distance, looking like he was contemplating all of life’s mysteries at once with his bare feet slowly moving just under the surface of the ocean. his dark jeans were rolled up to the middle of his calves.

we sat like that until the sky got even darker and the bats started calling out to their friends. i noticed how sebastian’s head snapped up to look for the source of the noise, his lips curling into a small smirk in appreciation of the animal nightlife.

he sighed and took his feet out of the water, shaking off the droplets before putting his socks and shoes back on.

“you don't have to look.”

finally, his voice didn't sound like i was a nuisance to his peace. i looked up at him, my eyebrow raised in question, to which he rolled his eyes, though not unfriendly.

“for a new spot, i mean. i didn't mind sharing.”

he turned and left. for a while, my eyes were on his back, watching as his figure got smaller and smaller, but as he disappeared with only his footprints left in the sand, i felt like i could smile again, even just a little.

i sat on the pier for a little longer before getting up and padding barefoot through the damp sand and wet streets, making my way to the farm. the entire way home i thought about him. the entire time swearing to myself that i’ll try again, learn from my mistakes, and make sure i live to honour my grandpa’s memory while bettering myself. and next time i see sebastian, i won't be crying.

[jinxed-newyork]

SMOKE & FOG

0.2 The Last Drop

pairing: jinx x reader (romantic), reader x Isha (siblings), reader x Sevika (platonic) 

synopsis: Your injury has led you to the one person you swore you could never trust again. A traitor who has never brought you any good and only harm decides to patch you up but with any good deed comes a price. The only question is will this lead to your sister or just more terror? 

word count: 4.8k

warnings: unreliable narrator (reader), morally gray actions from narrator (reader), villainous activity, murder, oppression, mistreatment, blood & gore, hurt/comfort, drugs & drug use, PTSD, canon violence, suggestive themes, angst, (arcane season 2) spoilers, cursing, fighting, mental illnesses, degrading language towards characters and about characters, indirect Maddie Nolan slander, Caitlyn Kiramman slander 

A/N ; most underlined things have a song that go with them that I highly reccommend you listen to , to get the feel/vibe of what's happening ! the same thing applies for the first chapter but I forgot to tell you . also you guys should send me requests for other things you wanna see me write about while you're waiting on a new chapter.

My legs could only carry me so far, my stomach felt like my insides were seconds away from spilling out. The blood dribbling down my arm made a path no matter where I went, it was sickening, like a retelling of my crimes even though I couldn't remember them. I could hear their cries and screams in the back of my head, but not what led up to them. Grown men’s cries of pain and sorrow wasn’t something that I was used to, I was always the one in pain, the one being kicked into the ground and abused until that got their sick fill of my defeat. I couldn’t cough up any blood, the injury wasn’t deep enough to ruin me but it still felt like it was. I was so worried about Isha but I could feel my body starting to slow, I could feel myself losing it ever so slowly, I went to the only place that I could find. The Last Drop.

This used to be a place of solace and safety, one ran by Vander, the symbol of peace in this lowly town, no matter what he would always be able to cheer you up and now it was overrun by Silco’s old men however one of them was my saving grace. “Sevika!” A tortured cry escaped my throat along with her name. She had to be here, I couldn't hold myself up any longer so she said had to be here. “SEVIKA!” My voice cracked, every octave I never thought possible, my body fell from the wall, the only strength I had was to hold my injury from bleeding anymore.

A gold and brown boot fell into my vision but I couldn’t even lift my head up for a simple greeting, instead I fell flat on my face, I felt warm– is this what dying truly is? It’s so lifeless, my life didn’t flash before my eyes, I didn’t regret every decision I’ve ever made or see some bright light, I was wondering who was gonna take care of Isha while I was gone. Who was gonna make sure you ate every night and made sure she got home in one piece, who was gonna keep her away from Smeech while I couldn't, who was going to replace me because I was too weak to stay alive and help. 

My eyes opened drearily, the first thing gracing my vision was an unpeeled orange. Oranges are actually my favorite fruit, one of the only good things that people stole from topsiders besides equipment was fresh fruit. Everything in the underground was just a remake of something from topsiders, food that was already on someone else’s plate, clothes that were already on someone else’s back but fresh fruit was the one thing we had and it was delicious. Sure it wasn’t as great as sugary treats or drinks that I was sure all the topsider brats got to have on a daily basis but it meant something.

My hands immediately reached for it, splitting it open down the middle and taking a piece off of the side before letting it into my mouth. This could have been poisoned but I would have died a happy person, because who gives a shit? Within a moment of tasting the sweetness of the fruit, reality hit me like a train– I was bleeding out in the middle of the Last Drop and now I’m.. where the hell am I? This wasn’t the Last Drop, or the back rooms where Vi, Powder and little man used to be, I envied them, every kid in Zaun did. Those little shits got away with murder and Vander always protected them, he was a savior, everyone loved him. All I could do was sigh at the memory of Vander and the others whenever we were younger, Powder reminded me so much of my little Isha, even though she was just a baby, an infant, they were so similar. Not anymore. 

Powder was long gone, so was Vi and Mylo and Claggor and Little Man, every single one of them was gone. Even though “powder” was still in Zaun, she wasn’t truly the same. This wasn’t my concern, I needed to figure out where the hell I was. The air felt thin, a weird greenish color and it was near toxic. Inhaling it felt like I was swallowing sandpaper, my throat was closing up and every cough I hacked out was painful, my eyes were barely able to see through the clearing and I was met with the sight of enforcers, through the clearing all I could see were enforcers. A whole group of them, however one I could recognize without even thinking about it. Caitlyn Kiramman.

A gun raised as she explored the foreign territory and her lackeys followed in suit, they were actually terrifying, all of them, gas masks covering their guilty faces, the swoosh of hair just barely escaping their helmets. A shield plate covering their chest from any harm and yet everyone else down here was stuck with no armor, no masks, no weapons but they were raiding a place that looked similar to an arcade– a child’s place. How worse could they get?  How worse would they be if they catch me? I caught a glimpse, a small glimmer of blue hair, a braid running from the shadow but it escaped my vision long before I could actually see it. I couldn’t worry about this, whether or not that's who I assumed it was, I needed to get out of there immediately. My stomach was still in knots of pain but I still ran, I couldn’t be in there. The last thing I heard was a singular shot let off but my body went in the opposite direction. 

Half an hour later I was stuck with half an orange, two full vials of shimmer and no sister in sight. I was too close to our house to keep the shimmer on me, it wasn’t like my job was a secret to Isha but I didn’t want her to see me like this. I didn’t even know if the shimmer was still in my system, two whole vials of it had gone down the drain or rather injected itself into my skin and I couldn’t even feel it or remember what happened but I knew it was there, I could feel the buzzing under my fingertips. It was a dormant sensation waiting to be reawakened with every step I took but I couldn’t allow it to over take me. “Isha! Isha, I’m home!” I shouldered off my jacket, a hand rubbing over the bandage around my mid area in the cracked mirror. Weak Freak. Blighter. Bitch.

I held my head in my hands, the headache brewing over the cynical thoughts running through my mind, I saw him, the debt collector I killed. I saw him in my mind and behind me in the mirror but whipping around only led to air and the agitation of my headache even more. It was starting to turn more into a migraine, even the lights would irritate me, I couldn’t open my eyes without the lights burning them and my head screamed at me. “Your fault! It’s your fault that I’m dead! You know that right, blighter?” “Shut up!” As the silence finally fell, I remembered my reality, no one was in the house but me, not Isha, or the debt collector or enforcers. Just me. “God fucking damn it, I’m losing my shit.” 

I didn’t remember passing out, I didn’t even remember making it to the scratched up couch that we owned and yet that’s what I woke up on and to my surprise my sister was in the very same room as me, crouched on the floor with scuffs on her face and hands. Rushing over, I stooped down to her level, brushing the caked up dirt out of her hair and dust off of her face. She looked like she had taken a tumble beyond comparison but she was smiling and giggling like an idiot. Her hat was covered in small drawings all over it, pink, blue, yellow and purple streaks of colors splayed all over it, what the hell? “What happened to you? Where have you been?” She completely ignored my question, glazed over eyes as she asked about my whereabouts– signing it, I had to see her dusty and fragile hands ask about where I had been and why I was injured, I couldn’t admit to my sister that I was selling again and I definitely couldn’t say that I had probably killed six people. “Smeech, I pissed him off and we both know that doesn’t end well but I’m fine. It’s a small injury, it doesn’t hurt as bad as it looks.” She frowned, not believing any of my bullshit by a long shot but I tried. I took the hat off of her head, examining it closer, wiping off the small bits of dust that remained.

She shook her head at me, complained that it was purely nothing, it was hilarious how much sass a little girl could have with her hands and facial expressions alone, honestly impressive. I didn’t want to leave her side anymore, I couldn’t after the scare today. I was afraid to even go back and sell, Smeech would want revenge for the debt collectors I may or may not have killed, I still couldn’t recall correctly if that was me. Fuck. I let out a hiss at the memory of me ditching the vials right outside the house, some random mainliner was gonna grab them, that wasn’t the concern to me but if they overdosed on my shimmer then Smeech would know and all hell would rain down like hail as he slowly started fitting the pieces together. An image of Isha being dragged away from me, kicking and screaming, fighting like all hell because she was my sister but still losing, I couldn’t take the sight, my head was hurting, basically killing me, there was no way I could let that happen.

I returned the hat to her head, squishing it down enough to cover her eyes as a joke waiting as she pushed it back up with an unagitated glare. “We don’t have any food for tonight, so I’m gonna go get some, alright? I just need to make a little bit more money and there will be enough for both of us..” I sucked in a breath as I looked at her. “If I can’t make enough for two then you can get whatever you want, alright? I’ll be right back, shouldn’t be wrong.” Her small frame ran towards my leg, launching herself onto me and not letting go even whenever I tried to shake her off like a bug. “Isha! Isha! Come on, you gotta let me go! I gotta go!” I would never yell at her, more groans of annoyance at a normal tone, one of her hands released its grasp to sign to me once again. “Promise me you’ll come back. Promise.” Gods, this little girl, she was gonna be the death of me.

“I’ll do you one better, I swear. I swear to every deity in this realm that I will make it back home to you, Isha. I don’t care what happens as soon as I leave this house, I will make it back to you.” I wiped the small tear from her face and planted a kiss on her forehead (a little hard with that helmet of hers but I wasn’t gonna tell her to remove it) , rubbing her cheeks and she finally released her grip and with that I made my way back out into the city– and I will keep my goddamn promise. 

Never in my life did I ever think that I would be going toe to toe with a mainliner for some shimmer that I didn’t even want and yet here I was, getting the shit beat out of me by some random hash-head with a bone to pick because I saw the shimmer the same time that he did. Goddamn it! Why did I even leave the house? The shimmer was a lot further than I remembered and now I was reeling the consequences of my actions, with a kick towards the man’s torso, I felt stronger than I usually do but the feeling was shortly replaced as he flew away from my body and his sudden missing force sent me backwards directly onto the ground. Man, I am just having a shit day today. Dusting myself off, I made it back to my feet, scoffing as I took a look around at the scene before me, I did all this for one vial. What's gonna happen when I find the second one? If I even find it. 

“Hey! Are you ok over there?” God fucking damnit. Hiding the shimmer behind my back I turned towards the voice, another group of enforcers however one of them was injured, I had only been outside for an hour and a half maybe two, I lost track of time but still that wasn’t enough time for a group of enforcers to get jumped unless there was something else going on in town that I wasn’t aware of. A ginger haired girl poked her head out from the light in the alleyway towards me, my eyes looked bloodshot because I couldn’t recall the last time I had slept or had water or a full meal. Hiding my face with a glare towards the ground, I tried to sneak glances at them, a weird blue looking guy was holding up a bulkier man, there was no way I was gonna win a fight if he was gonna be my opponent, it didn’t matter how much shimmer I had in my body, he could body slam me no problem– it also didn’t help me that I didn’t really know how to fight, I just swung my hands and eventually they would hit something or someone. “Hey, sweetheart, are you ok?” Why did she have to call my sweetheart? It was so much more..demeaning, degrading me in such a way, like she was taunting me. The lick of her accent only dealing more pain to the wound, Piltover, every single one of them assumed the worst of anyone down here and the fact that she was an enforcer? God I would never live it down if she found me with shimmer, hell she might even kill me on the spot, so my only option? “Fine. That.. crackhead tried to steal my money. He succeeded, I’m pretty much out.” I lifted my face, so that she could see me, injuries from my other fight still visible, her face reacted but not her words however the two behind her seemed impatient, whispering about her needing to hurry up. She rummaged through her jacket pocket and dropped some coins in my hand, plenty for me and Isha, god they were so easy. With a wave she ran back to her little group, a scowl on the man’s face as he looked at me, at that point hiding the shimmer didn’t do me any good and they were leaving and injured as well, were they really gonna stop for me? 

That ginger haired enforcer gave me plenty enough for me and Isha, maybe even a little bit more however I still needed to get rid of this shimmer– I needed to at least prove to Smeech that I did sell my products and didn’t just lose it (which is exactly what I did). I owed him nothing, absolutely nothing and yet here I was still trying to pay off my dwindling debt..a debt that was definitely going to have some “added fees” as soon as he figured out that it was me. My eyes glazed over the sky, a blanket of dimming sky had fallen over, then again I could barely see anything due to the glaze of the smoke, it felt like the smoke from earlier however it wasn't as thick so it was just barely breathable. My hand flew over my mouth, a small attempt to filter the trashed air, as soon as I made it through the smoke I could see Piltover in my wake, one day Isha would be up there, she wouldn’t be stuck down here with anyone else, she would be trusted and respected and no one would where she came from because I’d erase any existence of her being in Zaun, for her own safety, for her future. 

My thoughts were shattered, not because of the shimmer this time, but because the ground began to shake, the gas in the alleyway being dragged outwards towards god knows what. I thought it was a monster or a vacuum until Piltover was painted pink, blue, purple and green, the colored smoke staining buildings which I could see even from where I was. Children started giggling, running around and celebrating the defaming of Piltover’s “perfect” picture. I couldn’t stop the smile that was shown on my lips– gaze trapped on the smoke until it dissipated. “Jinx! Mommy she’s back, it’s Jinx!”  Jinx? Two run ins in one day would be crazy, right? I ran into the enforcers that she murdered earlier today and now I’m watching her plans play out in front of me. I've only seen her a few times in my entire life but she was enrapturing every single time, her mind was near genius, something that no one ever appreciated or acknowledged but I saw it, I noticed it, granted that meant nothing to her since we had never met but still. She’s actually the one who got me into creating my own trinkets. Isha took a liking to it as well, perhaps I should start to tweak them a bit more. Focus. If Jinx was up to no good then I was pretty much screwed– Isha. I left her at home and promised that I would be back, no I didn’t promise, I swore that was more important than any promises I could ever make. I sprinted back home but I’m not sure why I even got my hopes up. She was gone, she didn’t leave anything behind, damnit maybe I should have made her swear that she was gonna stay here, not that I was gonna come back. 

My unfortunate first thought was to check wherever Jinx was, thanks to that colorful display she couldn’t have been that far. I didn’t really know where her “hideout” was, I just knew where Silco used to do business since it was pretty hard to hide such a renovated building and it’s been abandoned ever since his death a few months ago.. To be honest Silco gave me more hope than Vander ever did but once he fell down the wrong rabbit-hole and created shimmer, I lost confidence in every new “symbol of peace” that popped up every few months, except Jinx.

Something about her was.. interesting, it was like she never wanted to be a symbol but everyone kept treating her like one, some may say it was just her being humble but I know better. It was being stuck with a responsibility you never asked for and every single person who was supposed to lead you and show you how it works is gone and now you’re forced to figure things out on your own and everyone is depending on you. It’s how I felt when our parents died, the responsibility to take care of Isha was killing me inside. I never even wanted another sibling, I just wanted to be an only child, we were struggling enough as it is and dad was always sneaking out. When he returned he reeked of Piltover, of their lavish perfumes, exotic smells and fancy food, we both knew that what he was doing wasn’t good but he was all that we had so we couldn’t just let him go because of some.. Piltover woman who stole his heart from my mother.

I couldn’t find it in my heart to call him the traitor that he was, not even mom did it, if anything she looked worried for him every time he got back from Piltover, stealing him away with hushed whispers. I could never really hear what they were talking about, I just assumed that they didn’t want to fight in front of me but I was a big girl, I could handle it, I didn’t need them to treat me like a scared child. 

Now here that scared child was again, clutching my shirt away from my skin like it would save me from whatever horrors were inside of this building, I expected dead bodies in the corners, people’s heads on the gate as a warning or a beware, instead it looked like a normal building but with a lot of lights on the outside. I shoved the front door open, it seemed locked but this place was clearly abandoned so it's not like there were any guests hiding inside– besides the ghosts that is.

It was freezing in there and the temperature only felt like it was dropping the further I moved, the slow movement led me to an office room, an uncomfortably dusty chair was hidden away by the even worse looking desk. It was very uncanny, I could play out Silco turning around in his chair in front of me despite the fact that I have never met the man face to face. “Well, don't you clean up nicely?” The rasp from her voice made me jump, my head swinging in every direction to find out where it came from, she sounded like she was behind me, and beside me all at once– turns out she was just beside me. 

“Sevika– mara, you could at least announce yourself?” There was a brand new arm that adorned her, gold in color but drawings all over it in those same, now traumatizing colors, and a slot machine to go with it, wasn’t she an addict? “What are you doing down here, blighter?” I hated that term and she knew it, it was definitely just to get under my skin but it worked every single time. “Looking for my sister.” She shouldered a laugh. “I was wondering where your other half was. My personal favorite out of the two, she doesn’t complain as much.” I rolled my eyes, she was mute, she didn’t verbally complain about anything but I guess just shutting up is what gets you favored by Sevika. “We found her aright, Jinx caught her trying to get away from some of that rat’s ol’ debt collectors. That your doing?” I mentally cursed however my body showed my disdain from the way I deflated. “I… I didn’t mean to. Damn it, it wasn’t my fault. A group of enforcers came out of nowhere and jumped the shit out of me and some other sellers. It’s how I got this–” I lifted my loose shirt to show her the wrapped up injury,  she grimaced and looked away from it as if she wasn’t interested in it but hadn’t she already seen it before? Why was she acting like this? “Wait, weren’t you the one who bandaged me up? You’ve already seen it, why are you asking me what happened?” Her head turned back to me and her eyebrow raised as she stood up and walked towards me. I’m not a pussy but I know a fight that I can and cannot win and she is someone I can’t fight and win. “No. I haven’t seen you since last year.” “Then.. I went to the Last Drop, looking for you. Who helped me if it wasn’t you? I saw your shoes..” Sevika groaned loudly and took off, I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to follow behind her but I did. 

It looked like an abandoned air ventilation system, however it was decorated with the same drawings that I saw on Isha’s hat when she came home and the one’s on Sevika’s arm– Jinx? Isha noticed me before I noticed her, running immediately over to me and hugging onto my leg, tears filled my eyes as I looked at her. I didn’t think she was dead but my hopes of her being alive and well weren’t very high at the moment. I clutched onto Isha’s side, tears filling my eyes, I had almost her twice in one day and it was enough to give me a heart attack– it didn’t help that both times I thought I lost her ended with Zaun’s symbol of “peace” and psychopath who was also the most alluring woman I have ever met in my entire life.

God damn it Jinx.  She scowled at me, an eyebrow raised at my presence, that seemed to be happening more often than I would have liked it to. “Enforcers, they jumped the shit out of me and almost killed me. I would have never left her alone if it wasn’t for those bastards.” Isha’s inaudible giggle was below me as she signed the word for “shit” and I lightly slapped her hand away, kids are so bad. Jinx’s eyes didn’t seem to waver, forever staring into my soul as if she was gonna rip my throat out with her teeth for even touching Isha– like she wasn’t my sister. “Looks like you didn’t do a very good job.”

 Her gaze went towards my stomach and I wanted a hole in the floor to open and swallow me up, her surveying my body was so intimidating and intimate that it began to breach the lines of uncomfortable. “I killed those enforcers ok? I killed them and the stupid debt collectors in that goddamn alleyway. There are six people dead and it’s all my fault so can I get a little grace here?” I almost yelled at her, who was she to tell  me that I was a bad sibling? A bad protector? “You left her!” She seemed to stalk closer to me with her every word. “At home! She was never supposed to be on the streets in the first place but if she didn’t leave the house like I told her not to then we wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place!” My words were directed towards Isha but my anger was shot directly at Jinx, so much she almost choked on her words. “But you still left me!” “I didn’t mean to! I went to hell and back to get back home to her!” I was so entranced by my own fit of rage that I didn’t even notice her change of words. She wasn’t talking about Isha, she was talking about herself, but I had never left or even met Jinx personally besides this one point. She had just been a whisper in the crowd, a terrifying sight that Silco had created that he guarded as if she was actually his own daughter. It was sickening to hear but it was none of my business. We both just sat there, heaving chests and ignoring the tears that were threatening to slide down our cheeks, the only reason I looked away from her was because Isha tapped my thigh. “We were fighting the enforcers, the one with the blue hair almost shot us!”  Us? Us Us?! My eyes flicked up towards Jinx, invading her personal space without a care in the world, pushing her back up against some makeshift desk, she could have stopped me if she wanted to but didn’t. 

“You let Isha get close to Caitlyn Kiramman? You almost let her get shot by Caitlyn Kiramman?! She’s a fucking child! Do you have any restraint at all or are you just that evil that you can’t even help yourself but enjoy chaos? And why the fuck did Caitlyn Kiramman almost shoot you?” At my last question I spun towards Isha, I didn’t actually know anything about what was going on, I just knew that she almost shot my sister and that was enough to go off on anyone around. “The kid was protecting Jinx. Jumped on top of her and wouldn’t let go of all hell, Caitlyn and Vi were trying to kill her– your sister didn’t want to let that happen.” Oh. Well now I felt like a fucking idiot, Jinx was going through hell and I just blamed her for everything without even asking, however she could have clarified or at least said something while I was standing in front of her– why hadn’t she moved? I turned my head back to her to apologize but she bombarded me with a hug so fast I almost fell over, those tears from earlier finally over took her, wetting the top of my already ruined shirt. I didn’t know how to respond, I just awkwardly wrapped my arms around her as she snuggled into my neck. “You came back to me.” 

taglist: @livinginabasement @llycrow @katethejinxwife @hank-girl @ayedomino0 @jiunxo @vivispace @maksysti @jinxslapdog

[reneesghostinthelivingroom]

hey! i was wondering if you could do a polyplastics fic thing thats more like karen-centric. like karen was having a good day but then she heard some random people talking about how shes dumb and just like objectifying her, so she runs to the bathroom and crys in the stall then the reader walks into the bathroom and hears someone crying so they check and see that its karen, obviously they comfort her, and texts gretchen and regina to come to the bathroom and then when they get there, karen tells them all what happened and gretchen and regina just storm out and the other two are super confused and then like turns out regina and gretchen went to find the dudes that were talking about karen and regina goes all apex predator on them while gretchen very loudly reveals a bunch of their secrets to the whole cafeteria. and then lalalala kiss kiss everyone is happy

Apex Bodyguards

|| poly!plastics x nonbinary!reader

(i myself am poly)

|| Warnings; brief mentions of slut shaming, karen being bullied, swearing, regina being regina

|| Summary; Karen was having a great day, that is until she overhears people talking about her in a not so positive light. She gets upset and runs off to the bathroom, where reader finds her.

Requests open!

Started; September 15th

Finished; September 17th

~~~

Karen's day was going really well, like. Super well. She spent her whole morning with her girlfriends, she even had a couple classes with Gretchen that morning.

She was getting ready to go to her fourth period class, walking through the hall to get to her locker when she overheard some students talking. She heard them mention her name and smiled at first. Until she heard what they were saying.

"Oh my God, yes. Thank you! Karen Shetty is so fucking stupid oh my God." One girl said, the others around her laughed as another one piped up," we literally don't talk about this enough."

"And I bet Regina only keeps her around for her boobs. Cause like damn, but imagine the back problems that slut has."

"Oh my God, can we talk about the slut thing? Cause like- eleven people? Girl wow, you're like how old?"

"For real!"

Karen felt her lip tremble and put her hand to it as she ran to the closest bathroom.

"Oh shit, think she heard us?" One of the girls asked when they saw how fast Karen left, the other shrugged.

A few minutes pass and you walk into the same bathroom, sighing as you headed to the stall. Already dreading fourth period. None of your friends were in that class and to make it worse it was history. Gross.

As you opened the stall, you heard a sniffle from the one next to it and paused for a moment. Was someone crying? You listened a little closer and heard a few more sobs, so you knocked on the stall.

"Hey? You doing okay in there?" You asked, the sobs had sounded vaguely familiar but you couldn't figure out why that was. Then you heard the voice that followed.

"I... no."

Shit. Karen.

"Baby, open the stall." Your voice was softer as you listened to her shuffle around then open the door. Immediately she was in your arms, crying into your shoulder and you held her tight," hey, hey, hey.. you're okay. What happened?"

You weren't great at comforting, but this was your girlfriend. So you made an effort as the two of you moved to sit on the bathroom floor together.

Karen explained everything through sobs as you sat there, holding her hand and giving her knuckles soft rubs. Something you'd seen Gretchen do a number of times, including to you. So you knew it helped.

"Those bitches." You muttered, giving Karen a quick soothing kiss," look at me, baby. Listen, okay?"

She looked at you, mascara running down her cheeks. You frowned at the sight.

"They don't know what they're talking about. You are plenty smart. Remember a few days ago? You recognized that I was upset when even Gretchen and Regina couldn't see it. You helped me. That was all you, baby. You know exactly what people need and you're there for them. Those bitches? They clearly don't know you well enough to see just how kind, beautiful and intelligent you are." You rambled on, Karen listening to your every word. You weren't lying, Karen was smart. Just... in different ways. So you made sure to highlight that for her to see it.

That got a smile from her and you felt your shoulders relax. Maybe you weren't so bad at this comforting thing.

"I'm gonna text Regina and Gretchen, okay? Can I let them know what happened?" You asked, she gave a small nod and cuddled up against you. Your arm draped around her side while your other took out your phone. Sending a text to the groupchat and letting them know what happened.

Gretchen; oh my god no way?? is karen okay? i'll be right there <3

Regina; im gonna skin a bitch.

You had closed your phone and focused on Karen again and didn't see Regina's response. Though you could only guess what she would say.

It took no more than two minutes for both girls to come storming into the bathroom. Gretchen softened as she saw the two of you on the ground; Regina however only got more pissed off. Her arms folded across her chest, nails digging into her skin.

"Who was it?" She demanded, she looked at you. You shrugged, so she looked at Karen," Well?"

Karen fidgeted with her fingers, taking a glance at Gretchen who gave an encouraging nod," Lyliah Haydens.. Lexis Hexx."

You frowned hearing the names, giving Karen's shoulder a comforting squeeze. You didn't know the girls but Gretchen seemed to.

"I've got this. Regina, come on." You'd never seen Gretchen take charge so fast as she walked right out of the bathroom.

"Don't have to tell me twice." Regina replied, following after at a slight jog so she could walk in front. "Got any dirt on Lyliah and Lexis?"

"Obvi, Gina." Gretchen stopped when they were in the hall and turned to look at Regina with a grin," Lyliah's been sleeping with Lexis' boyfriend behind her back. And remember last week when the girls locker room smelled like piss? Lexis pissed her pants in gym class. Mr Carr wouldn't let her go to the bathroom."

"God, it's hot when you gossip." Regina smirked and walked ahead, pulling Gretchen along," come on."

Meanwhile, you stayed behind with Karen. She'd calmed down by this point so you just sat together, you listened to Karen talk. Just admiring her smile and the way her hands moved and twirled with each sentence.

"Welcome to NorthShore Daily! Where we interrupt you to give the latest rundown of-" The afternoon announcements were interrupted...

"Is this stupid thing on? Gretchen!" Your head whipped around towards the hall when you heard Regina's voice over the loud speaker.

"What's she doing?" You asked aloud.

Karen shrugged and listened with you.

"Yes, Regina." You heard Gretchen reply.

"You can't just-" The usual student announcer was cut off again by Regina.

"I can do what I want, move it loser." Some shuffling was heard before Regina continued," You want some news that's actually interesting, NorthShore? Turns out, Lyliah Haydens is sleeping with Lexis Hexx's boyfriend! And get this.. Lexis Hexx is the reason the girls locker room smelled like piss last week. She wet her pants in gym."

Regina paused for dramatic effect, you could almost hear the smirk in her voice. Only Regina would be able to get away with a stunt like this.

"Let this be a lesson to not shit talk my girlfriends." Regina added on.

"...um, back to regular announcements-" The usual student announcer tried her best to continue on after that.

You heard Regina's heels coming down the hall before her and Gretchen appeared at the bathroom entrance again. Regina had a smirk on her face, looking rather proud of herself.

"Thanks, guys.." Karen murmured.

They nodded and Gretchen sat down with the two of you, but Regina looked disgusted at the thought of sitting on the floor.

You noticed and gave your lap a pat, offering it as a seat instead.

She rolled her eyes, trying to seem reluctant but you could tell she liked it as she sat down with you.

Gretchen gave Karen a soft kiss," feeling better, mama?"

Karen nodded," can we get pizza?"

Regina laughed a little," maybe."

The four of you definitely went on a pizza date that night. It was well deserved.

[delimeats-000]

Can you pay my bills?

summary: cockwarming chris is too distracting.

warnings: smut, language, pp

pairing: chris sturniolo x reader

@strniolosworld❤️

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

i get home from running errands all day.

the guys are always busy and im basically freeloading as chris’ girlfriend so i take care of chores and shit. (women duties yk?(jk please dont come for me))

i drop the grocery bags on the kitchen counter and begin putting things away.

“CHRIS?!” i call him upstairs to help me.

“WHAT?!” he yells back.

“WATCH YOUR MOUTH!! COME HERE AND HELP ME!!”

i hear him stomping up the stairs quickly. he comes up behind me, hand on my waist he kisses my cheek.

“Sorry, ma.” he slaps my ass then begins grabbing shit off the counter and putting it away.

“Alright I gotta go fill out some checks and make some payments, ok?”

“Noooo..” he puts the last item in the pantry and grabs me. pulling me closer he says, “I need yooou.”

“You need me to pay the bills or we wont have internet or water.” i giggle feeling a bulge in his pants pressing against my thigh.

i kiss him softly trying to get out of his grasp.

“Im serious, baby.” he grabs my wrist. “Just let me fuck you, please?” his whining finally gets to me.

“Fuck. Fine, how about I sit on you while I make the payments?”

i watch the smile grow on his face. “Yes please.”

i drag him downstairs to his room and we sit at his desk i open my file cabinet and grab the checks and my address book. (ik it’s old ppl shit but i loooove paying bills on paper)

“Ok baby. Pull down your pants and sit down.”

he excitedly does exactly as i told him. i look at his dick, if i had time i would love to fuck myself on it but right now i’ve got things to do, other than him.

i get right in his face and smash my lips against him. i kiss him roughly for a few more seconds before pulling away to spit right on his cock.

“Shit.” he lets out a whimper.

i pull my pants all the way off slowly, teasing him just a little. he runs both hands across my ass as im bending over.

“You’re so beautiful ma.” he moans out, “Cant wait to feel you around my cock.” without hesitation i line myself up with him before lowering myself onto his length.

i cant help but cry a little, “Shit.”

“You feel so good.” he wraps his arms around me hands landing on both of my breasts, he begins massaging them.

moaning from the feeling i put my hands on top of his, “Don’t distract me, Chris.”

“Sorry, baby.” i can just hear the smug little smile in his voice.

i grab my papers and start filling them out. about 5 minutes go by when i genuinely forget im in his lap with his dick inside me.

as soon as i remember, i feel my walls clench around him. his head rests on my shoulder and he starts kissing down my neck.

“Chris.” i say, trying to ignore how good his lips are making me feel.

“Yes, ma?” he continues kissing.

“Chris you need to stop.”

he stops kissing my neck and instead starts grinding underneath me.

“Fuck.. chris- Chris, stop.”

“Why baby? Feels so good.” i can feel his warm breath against my neck now as he moans out with every movement.

“I know, my love. But I cant focus.”

his hands run up the front of me, from my stomach to my tits then finally his left hand is grasping my throat from behind me.

“Just let me fuck you already.” he harshly thrusts into me once.

“FUCK!! ok ok- fuck fine.”

he picks me up guiding me up and down on his cock. the pace is unreal i can’t even feel my legs at this point. i cant help but scream out his name.

the way he stretches me out hurts but i wouldn’t trade it for anything.

“CHRIS- Fuck, chris!”

“Feels good huh? My big dick making you feel good?” he lets out what’s almost a whisper in my ear before he continues groaning with everything upward thrust.

“Chris, baby. So close fuck.”

“Cum for me baby. Let me feel you cum for me.”

i scream out one last time before finishing all over him, my cum spills out onto his chair underneath us.

“Fuck baby, so good for me. Gonna let me cum in you?”

“Yes please please chris..”

once his name leaves my mouth i feel him twitch then shoot his cum up inside of me.

“Shit.” he says all fucked out, leaning back in his chair.

“You’re gonna have to finish these.”

“Why?” chris jumps back up.

we both moan at the sudden movement.

“Im too tired, Chris.”

“Leave it to Nick.”

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

i honestly hate this so yeah sorry, love you 🫶🏼

[averyfawkes]

Walking back to your house, in the middle of the night, after you got your heart broken, and wailing like a child is not what I had in mind when I set out for the night. I thought I was finally getting lucky, that it was the day for the bullied highschool gay kid to be loved and appreciated for being in my own skin, but no. Turns out, Patrick and his fellow football jocks made a bet on how quickly he can make me confess my love for him. Patrick asked me out on a date and my gullible ass was just over the moon that my highschool crush finally noticed me.

As I walked my sobbing mess of myself across the road, I looked up at the starry night sky and prayed. Prayed that someday, I won't be as stupid and naive as I am today. That somehow, I can change myself to be able to just say what I want in any situation I am in and be rid of all the overthinking and anxiety that I had in my head. I looked up to the stars and prayed for an out from being pathetic and simple-minded. I waited for a couple of seconds, expecting something, anything that can be considered as a response to my plea, but nothing happened. I laugh as I continue bawling my eyes out. That was the last thing I remember before I felt something struck my head and passed out.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

As I came to, I was greeted by a panicking nurse. She immediately ran out of the room as I looked around and found myself stuck in a hospital with multiple cables and hoses stuck into my body. I tried to move but I feel so weak to even lift a finger. All I can feel is this weird rumbling feeling in my stomach and the familiar sensation of a morning wood. I let out a sigh as close my eyes and try to remember what happened that led me in this hospital bed. My name is Avery, 15 years old, gay, and I was punked by a couple of football jocks. I want to cry again from remembering but I'm just too tired and my stomach is rumbling like crazy.

After a few minutes, a doctor and the nurse come into my room and proceed to check on how I feel at the moment. The nurse starts removing the life support connected to me and it feels like shit. I always wonder what deep throating feels like but not like this. As soon as she's done yanking out all the cables and tubes from my body, she hurriedly left my room, leaving the doctor standing beside me. I look up to him and he's quite handsome.

"So, Avery, again I'm Dr. Hernandez. Just to clear you out on some details, I am required to inform you about some news so I suggest you brace yourself for this." He says with a serious tone. "Can you tell me what year it is?"

"It's 2013, I'm a sophomore in Milton High." I sit up on my bed as I try to brace myself for news despite the intense rumbling in my stomach.

"Unfortunately, you were found unconscious on the road one morning and that was ten years ago. You've been asleep ever since." Dr. Hernandez explains to me as slowly as he can.

"10 years huh?" I ask as I feel my stomach rumble even more.

"Yes, Avery. I know it's a lot to take in. I already contacted your sister to pick you up. I suggest that you take this moment to rest so that we can run another check up on you this afternoon to see if we can let you go." He says as he checks his chart.

"My sister? Where's my mom? I want to talk to my mom!" I replied to Dr. Hernandez as my voice shakes.

"Your sister is your listed emergency contact here but I can try to ask for your mother as well. You should calm down and take it easy. Your body's still weak and you will need an intense rehabilitation in order to recover your strength."

"Calm down? Are you seriously telling me to calm down? 10 years! That's an awful lot of years!! Don't tell me to c-" I exclaim at Dr. Hernandez before I projectile-vomit right into his face.

I feel so embarrassed. Dr. Martinez is now covered with my greenish yellow puke. Before I could even open my mouth to apologize, I felt something throb in my head and everything started shaking. I can see Dr. Martinez in front of me and then suddenly I can see myself shaking on the bed. And then it stopped. I look up to see Dr. Martinez standing in front of me with his eyes white while his mouth is wide open. Slowly, his eyes return to normal as his mouth closes. No traces of my puke all over him.

"Look, Avery, I can never know how you feel right now but all I can say as your doctor is that you need to rest. Your body is extremely fragile after being in a coma for 10 years. It was a miracle that you even recovered and I strongly advise that you see how wonderful that is." Dr. Martinez says before he tidy up his scrub before he walks out of the room like nothing happened.

I was left alone in my room, confused and utterly speechless. What the hell was that? Am I seeing things now? Am I losing my mind? But the rumbling in my stomach is now gone, and so is my boner. But I guess hearing that you've been in a coma for 10 years can really spoil your mood, huh? I let out a sigh and gently lay down on my bed. Everything hurts just by moving around so I guess I should really rest for now. I just hope that Agnes will be here soon with Mom.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Have you ever felt like you've been aware of what's happening around while you're asleep? As if you know you're in a lucid dream but everything just seems so realistic that you think it's not a dream at all? Well, you get the gist of it. I'm not sure how to describe it myself but that's the best way I can describe what's happening right.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Doc, how did he take it?" Pam asks me as she tries to show off her ass for me.

"As you expected, of course. It's really a miracle that he even woke up. To be honest, I just had a meeting with his family 2 weeks ago about pulling his plug. Mrs. Fawkes wasn't able to pay for the bill last month and I gave them options. I guess Avery is just a fighter, you know?" I answer to Pam while she's definitely batting her lashes at me the whole time.

"Yeah, it should feel so good that one of your patients is better now. Why don't you celebrate that with me in the snug room?" Pam replies as she glided her hand along my hairy arm.

"You're just looking for an excuse now, Pam." I sarcastically say, as I feel my dick getting hard from this exchange.

What the fuck? I'm gay!

I suddenly feel like something inside me just stopped. My dick slowly softens and my body calms down.

"What's the matter, Nick? It'll be quick. I won't tell your wife." Pam whispers as she tiptoes to whisper into my ear.

Fuck! This bitch is horny! I have to get away from her right now.

"Yeah, I have to say no, Pam. Maybe next time." I found myself saying to Pam as I walk away from her, leaving her confused.

I feel tightness in my chest as I go inside a vacant room. I go inside the bathroom and look at the mirror. I open the faucet and wash my face with water to calm my nerves.

"What the hell is wrong with me today? Pam is in the mood and I walked away?" I say to myself as I slam my hand on the sink. I haven't been laid for a week and now that Pam was offering, I walked away? What was I thinking?

I am seeing through his eyes and hearing through his ears. I never noticed how handsome this doctor was before. He's rugged look is kinda turning me on.

"Fuck, I look so hot right now. I bet Pam really wants to ride my dick right now." I realize as I try to say my thoughts using my deep sultry voice.

Forget about her. Women are gross. Men are better. Look at me. I'm a fucking hunk!

I have this sudden urge to evaluate myself. Am I still hot? Am I still attractive? I take off my scrub and polo as I look at my naked torso in the mirror.

"Fuck yeah, I still look hot. Must be why Pam is getting flirty earlier."

Forget about her. Forget about women. You are not horny for her or any women, you are horny for men. Men like you. You look so hot right now. There are other men who look as hot as you. That's what you want. That's what makes your dick hard.

I can feel my dick getting hard as I continue to stare at my reflection. I feel so hungry with lust and my body starts heating up.

That's right, Nick. You're fucking hot. Your cock is so hard right now. You want to look for another hot man like you. You want to plunge your rock hard cock in his ass and fuck him until you had your fill. You need a tough man who can handle all your energy and vigor.

I thought of potential candidates among my colleagues in the hospital. Maybe Paul from the ICU, he has tight abs. Or Jake from Emergency, rumor says he is flexible in bed. What about Sander Huston, the optometrist? Nick always envies how big Sander's bubble butt is. I feel my hand groping my dick through my pants as I let out a gutteral moan. I can't wait to fuck some ass. I need to fuck right now.

Suddenly, my head cleared up. I lost my train of thought for a moment before I realized what I was doing. My face turns red as I immediately put back my clothes and pretend that I didn't just think about fucking my friends in the ass earlier.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I open my eyes to see Agnes and my mom arguing with each other before they notice that I'm awake. I give them a smile before they both start crying and hugging me. I feel so relieved that they're here now but I can't help but feel sad as I stare at their faces and notice that they're much older than what I remembered. Both of them are so happy to know that I woke up and started telling each other the things that I might need here while I go through the rehabilitation. I just let them do all the planning since I'm far too tired to argue anyway. I want to sleep again in order to have that wonderful dream again.

[gguk-n]

Falling for you again (Lewis Hamilton x Reader)

Summary- Getting the happily ever-after the two of them deserved.

There's a lot of domestic couple shit. Sorry, took me a while. Kinda long. Hope you enjoy this. This took longer than I hoped.

Part 1

Il mio dolce fratello maggiore- my sweet older brother

Sorellina- baby sister

Continued from where we left off

[Reader's POV]

Lewis closed the gap between us, our lips met softly but with an intensity of the yearning we felt for each other. It felt familiar yet tinged with the feeling of something new. His hands cupped my cheeks while mine grasped his shirt, pulling him closer. He smiled into the kiss at the close proximity. We were forced to pull away due to the lack of oxygen. He rest his forehead against mine, trying to catch his breath. "Even after so many years, you do not fail to take my breath away" he breathed out, barely above a whisper but I heard it. A crimson hue bloomed across my neck and cheeks; moving away from Lewis, only to be pulled back into a kiss with a slight force. "I have plans for dinner, Lew" the old nickname back, as I tried to free myself from his grasp. "How do you expect me to stop after getting you back after so many years?" he mumbled against my lips, pulling me in by my waist for another kiss. I smiled, "You haven't gotten me back yet" I teased. "I'll spend the rest of eternity trying" he whispered; squeezing my waist as he kissed me harder. I was able to finally pull away; "Ok, Lew, I have dinner plans with Marco and Kimi" I stated. "I could join you" he suggested. "Marco will probably have your head on a stick" I replied casually. "Why?" he quizzed. "Well, I did cry to him after we broke up and he was very angry at you. You know how girls are after a break up" I teased. I saw his adam's apple bob as he gulped in fear. "Play your cards right and maybe this time, you'll get to meet my family" I commented. "Let me know what everyone likes, I might have to start buying their affection" he thought out. "Can I have your number?" I asked shyly, I felt like a teenager, back at Silverstone 18 years ago. I left after we exchanged numbers.

I got dressed up for dinner and met the two of them in the hotel lobby. The restaurant was a 10 minute walk from the hotel, so we decided to enjoy the Monaco evening breeze. At the restaurant, we were seated after a bit of wait but the food was served promptly. I took a sip of my chardonnay when Kimi spoke up, "You and Lewis should date, or you'll end up alone with only me and my sister as your only visitors in your old age home." Marco dropped his cutlery with a clang. I almost spat my wine out; wiping my lips, "What makes you say that?" I questioned. "Both of you are single, and that would mean you would be there at more races" he continued. "I knew there was an ulterior motive" I laughed. Marco also having gained his composure back. We finished up with dinner and on the walk back I spoke to Marco, "Il mio dulce fratello maggiore" "What do you want?' Marco asked annoyed. "What can't I be nice?" I feigned innocence. "I've known you since you were born. Spill it" he replied. "Well" I paused, "I may or may not have agreed to a date with someone" I continued cautiously. "That's good news. Who's the lucky guy?" he asked excitedly. "Lewis" I pursed my lips. He looked at me in disbelief, "Sorellina" he spoke, "You remember how distraught you were" he smiled sorrowfully; "I just worry about you" he finished speaking. "I know, but I was 21. I'm older and wiser. I won't be reckless. I just, he's always been the one that got away. I just....this feels like a second chance." I said. He hummed in response, "If you're happy then I'm happy. But this time, if he makes you cry, I'm breaking his bones" he commented seriously. "Marco, don't scare him off just yet" I whined. "I'm looking out for you" he said, shaking his head. "What are you guys talking about with out me?" Kimi asked running back to us to stand in between.

After reaching the hotel, I went to sleep. I woke up to a text from Lewis asking what hotel I was in. I ended up texting him back only to be told to pack my bag because he was checking me out so that I could stay with him. Reasoning with him was useless; he can be relentless. I packed my stuff, got dressed and waited for Lewis in the lobby. He drove up to the entrance in his blue Ferrari. He took my stuff and put it in his car. He held the door for me and even buckled my seatbelt. The ride back was quick. We got out of the car and Lewis carried my stuff in. We spent the next couple of days walking around Monaco avoiding any paparazzi and spending as much of our time as possible wrapped up in each others embrace. "Can I be your boyfriend?" Lewis asked while we were laid in bed. "Didn't I tell you?" I giggled. "What?" Lewis whispered. "I accepted you as my boyfriend the time we kissed on the paddock." I whispered back. The smile on Lewis's lips could give any man a run for his money. He started peppering my face with kisses and thank yous in between.

Time flew by really quickly and it was finally time for me to return back to Italy. As I zipped up my suitcase, "Darling, I own a private jet, I'll fly you out" Lewis spoke. "Babe, you have a race next week. You should focus on that." I said. "Darling, I can't bear to be away from you" he said while wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my shoulder, slowly tracing his arms lower. His lips moved up to suck on my neck. I extended my neck to give him more access. His hands cupped my ass pulling me closer to grind against him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and brought his lips against mine. "When is your flight again?" he asked in between desperate sloppy kisses. "2 hours" I hummed against him finally pushing him away, "I'm gonna miss my flight" I went back making sure I had finish packing everything up.

Lewis reluctantly dropped me off at the airport. The flight back was bittersweet. We weren't able to see each other for almost a month until, Silverstone. Lewis had literally begged me to come since it was his home race. I was a little apprehensive and only after a lot of begging did I agree to go. When Kimi found out I was going to be coming, he was so ecstatic. He had planned out a weekend with me. How was I gonna escape him? was the only thought on my mind.

Kimi flew in with Marco and I came in a day later due to work. Lewis had come to pick me up at the airport even though I had asked him not to. The British media was in a frenzy and I had no plans of having my privacy violated as soon as I set foot on British soil. Also, I hadn't told any one about Lewis yet except Marco and Manuela. I felt like Lewis was a spy in another life because we evaded the British media with more ease than I expected. Lewis lead me up to his hotel suite which had a great view of the city. We stood facing the window with his arms wrapped around my torso and his chin buried in my neck. "How do you look this pretty even after a flight?" he mumbled. I couldn't help but laugh, "Amore it was 2 hours long" "Still" he hummed pecking my shoulder. "You should freshen up, we gotta leave for media day" he said, trailing kisses up my shoulder to the back of my ear. "I'm meeting up with Kimi, it's his sprint qualifying today" I said meeting his eyes. It seems to me that Lewis had plans I had just throttled. He immediately stepped back. "You know, he's like my own son. I can't miss his race when I'm here" I continued. "No, you should go. It would mean a lot to him" he said, sounding a bit deflated.

The qualifying finished without a hitch, Kimi just happy to have me around. Me and Marco hung out together till it was time to head back. There was this feeling of unease since the morning since I couldn't go with Lewis. The next day was Kimi's sprint race and I went to the circuit with him. The race was quite exciting since Kimi won his maiden race. Toto was over the moon and was running towards Kimi faster then Marco. I was so proud of Kimi who was so happy that me and his parents were there to be able to witness his maiden win. We spent the evening together and I even made plans for a huge celebrations once we were home.

On Sunday, I woke up later then Lewis, who had kissed my forehead good bye as he left for the paddock. I got dressed and went there adorned in my Lewis Hamilton merch. Kimi and Marco would were celebrating F2 race weekend which I had politely declined saying that I was exhausted. I knew that if I missed the race, Lewis would probably kill me. I immediately found the Mercedes hospitality where Toto greeted me and couldn't stop talking about Kimi's win and George's pole. I scanned the area for Lewis hoping to be saved from Toto's droning. Thankfully I was saved by Roscoe who had escaped his father's grasp and run full speed towards me. I bent down to pet him when Lewis came running to us with a smile, "He know's who is mummy is. Good boy" Lewis said while scratching his ear. Toto's jaw was on the floor. "He better" I giggled taking his leash in my hand. "You are very irresponsible Amore" I laughed. "Well, I can't do much when my son's a mumma's boy" he smirked. I felt a blush make it's way towards my cheeks. George had also joined in on the conversation when he heard mom. Lewis took my other hand in his and introduced me to the team as the love of his life. The blush only turned a shade deeper as everyone gathered around to greet and congratulate us. I got to finally meet his parents too, who looked so happy.

There wasn't a boring moment during the race. Everything was so thrilling. I found myself talking to his parents and then consoling George towards the later half of the race watching Lewis cross the chequered flag, winning his 9th home race. I found tears falling from my eyes while I hugged his mum. I ended up following the Mercedes crew to Lewis. He got out of the car and hugged his parents. While I watched the happy moment play out, next thing I know my lips are on Lewis after he had come running towards me with his helmet in his hand. The camera flashes went crazy as Lewis pulled away. "I'm so happy I get to share this with you" he whispered. "I'm happy I get to share this with you too" I whispered back.

The media was in a frenzy, not only did Lewis break his own record of most race wins at a circuit but he also just announced his relationship. My phone was blowing up from friends and family alike. We spent the night together. I would deal with everyone else another time. A 9 time Silverstone race winner needed my attention right now.

I invited Lewis to come back home with me since my parents were way to excited to meet Lewis. There was a feast when we got there and Kimi was sulking in the corner by the time I got to him after talking with everyone and introducing Lewis to them. "Hey, dolce bambino. What's up?" I asked tapping on Kimi's shoulder. "You could've told me before you know" he mumbled. "It hasn't been long since we started dating." I replied. "Well, you could kiss him on national television but not tell your god son" he grumbled. "Aww, I'm sorry sweetheart." I cooed pinching his cheeks. He moved his face away from me shaking his head. "I'm happy you got to be with the guy you never forgot" he said cheekily. "What?" I asked in shock. "He's the one you always talked about to mum after all of your breaks up, isn't he?" he smirked. "You're too smart for your own good. Let's go meet your Zio Lewis." I said while leading him to Lewis. My grandmother had loaded Lewis's plate with all her favourites. I was thankfully able to get my boyfriend back from her clutches.

Lewis got along well with my family, I thought as I watched him play with my nieces and nephews and help my dad around. At the end of the day, we were sat on my childhood bed while I showed him all of my albums and the trinkets I had collected over the years. A small smile played across his lips as he watched me pull album after album. "I hope our daughters are are cute and pretty as you" he said while holding an album. I turned around with a shocked expression on my face, "I hope our sons are as handsome and talented as you" I remarked. "I was gonna wait, maybe make it a little more special but I just can't wait, not when you are sat in front of me talking about our children." Lewis said, sliding down from my bed to get on one knee. Now I was extremely shocked with my hands over my mouth and my eyes filled with tears. "I showed this to your dad and he agreed that it was totally your style." he said while pulling out a black velvet box with a ring inside. "yes" I crocked out. "No, wait" Lewis cut me off. "I wrote this whole thing, and you're gonna listen to me." he said, making me giggle. I smiled watching him continue, "Y/N Y/L/N you were my first adult relationship and you taught me so much. The day I walked away from you was the day I left a part of me with you. Right now, I kneel in front of you to ask you to keep me forever with you. I hope that you will let this stupid man wrong his rights and let him love you for the rest of his life. I hope we get to grow old and wrinkly and watch our grandchildren on the porch or the paddock. I hope you will have me as I wish to have you." he finished speaking waiting for me to speak. But I was blown away. I was ugly crying with make up streaking my face; all I could do was nod. Lewis slipped the ring onto my left ring finger while I moved down to the floor in front of him. "I love you Lewis Hamilton. Thank you for coming back to me. I'll cherish you for the rest of my life." I said while wiping away the snot. Lewis wrapped his arms around me, bringing me in a tight embrace.

We got married in a private ceremony in Sicily where Lewis had initially planned to propose to me. It was as intimate and private as it gets when your friends and family are Italian. We got married in the summer break after Lewis's first year in Ferrari. The ceremony was wonderful and scenic as we vowed to be there for each other in sickness and health, in wealth and prosperity and for better or for worse. I had lost the love of my life once and I wasn't about to make the same mistake twice.

Only a little while later, our prayers were answered when I got pregnant with our first child. I knew Lewis would be a great dad, he was already planning out the kart he would gift his child the moment they were born. There were fights among the drivers on who would be the god father but we had decided that it would be Nico, who Lewis had reconciled with.

Watching Lewis interact with our children as I brought out the freshly baked muffins out to the patio. "Mamma, look at dad and Antonio." my daughter, Claudia called out. I walked out to find both my husband and son running around. I placed the muffins on the outdoor table and called them out to eat; all of them dug in. "I love it mamma" Antonio mumbled while chowing down on the muffins. Lewis wrapped his arms around my waist smiling at the scene in front of us. "I love you babe" Lewis said while pressing a kiss on my lips. "I love you too, Amore" I whispered back before I heard my kids making gaging noise making us laugh.

I was happy and getting back with Lewis was the best decision in my life.

Hope you like it

Tag list- @c23oj @unknownmystery22 @lh44girl

[taesanluv3r]

almost twenty

kim woonhak x reader

non-idol woonhak and reader anxiously holding onto their disappearing youth. kind of emotional, esp if youre aged 17-19, might make u cry (i did while writing it) idk. this fic is dedicated to everyone who's worrying so much abt the future (me) it'll get better i promise (telling myself this). lowercase intended. pls ignore any spelling mistakes/grammatical errors. enjoyy

wc: 2,365

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"so...have you heard back from any of the colleges yet?"

her mother's simple question alone was enough to ruin yn ln's whole afternoon. normally, it wouldn't piss her off that much at all, but the fact that she's heard the exact same words come out from the woman's mouth about a billion times this week alone was just the thing to fully pull on her veins. "i told you a million times already, mom!" she shouted, abruptly- and angrily- standing up from her seat at the dining table. "the schools will get back to me in two weeks. i just applied like two days ago! god..."

"...do you ever listen?"

the answer is no. what kind of parents were understanding enough to listen to their teenage daughter? in fact, what kind of adult would ever understand the way their kids, regardless of age, felt? maybe out there somewhere there was a family that were healthy enough to get each other that way. maybe out there somewhere an adult was caring enough to relate a little.

"tsk...yeah right...fat chance"

yn groans as she slumps belly first onto her bed. she turns over to lay on her back, staring up at the ceiling. her eyes almost water as they scan her surroundings. the glow-in-the-dark stars that decorated her walls, the baby-pink chair she had out-grown years ago, and the collection of stuffed animals that snuggled comfortably in the very corner of her bed-room; memories of the trajectory of her own life- well, the life she had up until right now, up until this awkward stage between teenage youth and adulthood.

she sighs as she gets up again, her fingers tracing against the gold medals that sat atop the floral wallpaper. she giggles, looking through every old photo inside each frame placed on her shelf. one of little yn holding up three gold medals, little yn with a big toothy grin only half the size of the cotton candy in her tiny hands, a slightly older yn when she had graduated elementary school, and one last image of a smiley middle-school yn, hands happily intertwined with her closest friend, kim woonhak.

the girl stops to stare at all her belongings a little longer. in just two more weeks she'd be hearing back from at least one of the colleges she had applied to. in just two weeks all of these things that surrounded her would be stuffed into a card-board box, somewhere far away from her sight. a sick feeling forms in the pit of her stomach. it's bittersweet. sure, she'd finally be free from the so-called shackles of her parents' constant nagging, finally having a life of her own...but at the same time, yn just couldn't help all the doubts that constantly clouded up her mind, those thoughts that made the sunny days look gloomy through her eyes.

she swears she might just start crying. not that it's anything new, the stress that comes forth from being on the verge of twenty always seemed to push a lever in the tear-making department in her eyes. she's interrupted this time though, by the unnecessarily loud ping of her phone. 'who could possibly be texting me now...'

'woon-not so-agi'

the contact name alone allows a little laugh to escape the girl's lips as she swipes her fingers against the screen to open his message.

where u at?? you aren't flaking on me are u????

his texts confuse her for just a moment, she had no clue what he was talking about.

hellooooo? don't tell me u forgot? we're supposed to meet at the tree remember?? hurry uppppppppp im not waiting long >:(

"shit is it 7pm already?!" without any more fuss, yn rushes to throw on her sweater. she doesn't bother to bid goodbye to her parents before she runs out the door- she's still upset at them, of course. the girl hastily climbs onto her bicycle, her legs pedaling the fastest they ever had. in almost no time, she arrives at the boy's backyard.

"what took you so long?" a male voice calls out from the top of the tree, woonhak's head peaking out from the wooden structure that sat between the branches. yn points a finger up at the air, signaling for him to wait for a second as she catches her breath. she could hear him laugh, followed by the rustling of leaves as a gust of wind flew by. "hurry and get up here" he said impatiently, prompting her to roll her eyes as she began to climb up the wooden ladder.

"finally" the boy said, smiling stupidly as the girl took a seat beside him on the tree-house-like space. it was a flat piece of wood, decorated with acrylic paints and a couple old throw pillows that his dad had installed for them on the tall tree in their backyard. they were about six years old then, just two little kids begging their parents every single day for a 'super ultimate tree-house' to pose as their 'super-spy head-quarters' on their silly playdates, having no clue that their favourite playing spot would hold the same purpose years later in their teens.

"what's up with you?" the boy's voice shakes yn out of the trance she didn't know she was in. "huh?" he laughs again, "you always look like you're about to jump off this tree" woonhak teases, and usually she'd tease back. usually, she'd say something too witty for him to understand, dying of laughter by herself while he sat there confused. that wasn't the case today though, instead, she stayed quiet, only the slightest smile on her lips.

in an instant, his face softened. "hey..." he began, shifting the weight away from his hands to lightly tap at her shoulders. his grip tightened, adding a bit of force to turn her around so they were face to face. "there really is something wrong, isn't there?" yn couldn't bring herself to answer properly, only a whimper of sorts coming out from her mouth- the quietest of noise before that lever inside of her eyes came loose.

"yn...what's wrong?" woonhak asked again, catching her body in his arms when she fell towards him, incasing her in his warmth. "i..." she manages to muster out, her voice muffled from the fabric of his baby-blue sweater. "...i don't know...i just..." once more, the words in her head failed to solidify, all her thoughts coming out as silent cries. he doesn't force her to speak anymore, just holding her tightly, rocking back and forth as if he were comforting a teen-sized baby.

it takes about half an hour for yn to gather herself and her thoughts up again. she had removed herself of woonhak's embrace, sitting straight up beside him. the shadow of their swinging feet moved with the grass below them, the afternoon sky creating a blue-ish tint and painting the scene like a movie. just the right atmosphere for the boy to open his ears up, all for her voice to enter right in.

"i just don't get it. i don't get why they keep pressuring me with all these questions! when are you going to college? you should start packing, have you found a dorm yet? have you found a job yet? when will you get your license? i just...it's just too much- it's like..." she momentarily stops her speech-like dialogue to think of the right adjectives. "like it's all going so fast? like they're rushing you?" woonhak completes the sentences for her, his eyebrows furrowing when she nods in agreement.

"exactly" yn says, bringing one leg up to rest her chin on her knee. "it's just so stressful...i guess i just can't believe it's all happening- i mean..." she picks up her speaking space, perhaps to stop herself from letting the tears take over again. "in two weeks we'll hear from those colleges...then we'll have to move and then start a whole new life and what if we don't end up in the same place? what if we lose contact? what if everything i've lived the past years of my life for..." her voice cracks and she pauses for a moment to look at the boy beside her.

"...what if it doesn't work out? what if it just all goes to waste?"

the water that had begun to well up in her eyes were a clear image in front of him now, only prompting him to start to tear up himself. their gazes lingered on each other for a moment, the vulnerability of it all crashing against the two teenagers like it had fallen straight from the sky.

"i get it" woonhak says, trying his best to stop himself from bawling like a baby- even if it meant breaking eye-contact with the girl and staring all too seriously at the leaves above him. "ah, being our age is so hard!" he yells this time, falling backwards to lay down on the wooden surface. his hands slapped over his face, the mere thought of the pair's coming adulthood far too frustrating for him. his slight temper-tantrum made her smile for the first time that afternoon- i mean, fully smile.

something about the boy's childish nature comforted her. like despite all these worries and all the stress about their coming twenties, whenever they were together they still had that little bit of youth to grab onto.

"hey...you're smiling again" she nods at his observation, moving to lay down on her back right next to him. yn lets out a sigh, watching as a flock of birds migrated over the skies above them. "yn?" woonhak calls out and the girl hums in response, turning her head over to face him. the boy's eyes are shiny and bright, despite the fact that the sun was long gone. she's confused when he moves to sit up again, but never breaking eye-contact.

"can you promise me something?"

she sits up with him now, nodding along with his words. "promise what?" her words are quick, like she didn't have any more time left in the world. "that when we're away in college, even if we get too busy with whatever twenty year olds do, even if we barely have any time on our hands anymore..." his voice starts to shake, eyes begin to water all over again. "promise me we'll never lose contact. promise me we'll still talk every chance we get? please?" the weakness displayed on his face, a kind of look she had never ever seen on the boy before this very moment. he fully expected her to cry as well, to breakdown into tears as they hugged for the rest of the night. she didn't though, instead the girl broke into a small fit of laughter.

"what...why are you laughing?!" a massive frown decorated his complexion, tears streaming down both sides of his face. "oh, woonhak..." yn says, a smile on her lips as her hands moved up to cup his cheeks, beginning to wipe away his tears. "you're so stupid..." the boy furrows his eyebrows, "you can't seriously be bullying me in the middle of this right now-" he's cut off when her pointer finger presses against his mouth. "no, you idiot. i'm just saying you're so stupid if you think i'd ever be able to survive my twenties without texting and calling you every chance i get!"

his mouth opens to form an 'O' shape. she lets out a giggle and his own one follows. yn lets out a deep breath, "i'd be way too lonely without you, woonhak" the boy smiles, "yeah, you've got like no other friends anyways- ow!" he exclaims, rubbing the spot on his shoulder she had slapped. "meanie" her baby-like language only makes him roll his eyes, "how are you almost twenty and still calling people meanie?" yn pouts, crossing her arms over her chest. "i only call you that...and only cause its the truth!" woonhak laughs once more before suddenly pulling her into his chest, she squeals at the sudden force sending them to lay down flat on the tree-house structure again.

they stayed like that for a while, wrapped in each other's arms under the shade of their comfort place. "i wish we could stay almost-twenty forever..." yn says through a sigh. woonhak nods, a hand stroking through her hair. "yeah...i wish time froze at age nineteen or something...like at nineteen point nine nine" her eyebrows knit together, "nineteen point nine nine?" he nods again, "yeah, like the ultimate teenager" the girl laughs, hiding her face against his side.

"you're an idiot, you know that?" - "but where would you be without me, yn?" she agrees with him, "you're right...life would be so terrible without you- even if you're the dumbest person i know..." he rolls his eyes. "hey, yn?" - "yeah?"

"you know...later if we're away from each other, please call me. call me all the time. call me if you're bored, call me if you're happy, call me when you're sad, when you're stressed, and please..." the boy trails off, sitting up again and grabbing the girl's hands to pull her up with him. he stared deeply into her eyes, and she did the same as she bit on her bottom lip.

"please call me if you're lonely...promise?"

she nods quickly, "of course. i promise" the pair melt into each other as they hugged once more, the blue sky had darkened and the bright moon watched over them from the cracks between the branches of the tree. "thank you..." kim woonhak says, separating from her grasp. "for what?" yn ln wonders, tilting her head off to the side in confusion.

"for spending the rest of our youth with me"

just like that, yn's worries and all her anxiety flew out the window. in a time like this one, when it feels like their teenage years are disappearing far too quickly, when no one around them seemed to understand, when they've become all too sensitive to the concept of change...at least they've got each other to seek comfort. an everlasting youth whenever it was just the two of them. as though time had frozen and they were stuck in the in-between...

at 19.99.

the end.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

aaa i cried while writing and proofreading this TT 19.99 coming out the same time ive been the most stressed abt future-related stuff, the album is so amazing and relatable! its very precious to me, dont forget to stream!! ily bonedo, ily woonhak, ily readers! here's to growing up together <3 tysm for reading. love, kona.

[hugs-and-stabbies]

Omg, I started playing dbd again after YEARS and I'm so happy to see that one my favorite dbd artists is still alive and kicking 🥺

If you still do dbd stuff and take requests I would cry and shit myself if you did something Trapper/Jake related. I remember loving that ship back then and never finding anything with them 🙏🙏🙏

Don't worry if you're not comfortable with it though, I'm just happy to see you're still on here, sending all my love! 💞

ahh!!! hi!! welcome back ♥♥♥♥♥ I'll always love and appreciate DBD for being the roots of this account :]

Trapper x Jake is definitely the type of ship that fills me with nostalgia for those old times hahah ♥ I really miss that feeling when there was barely any lore and the headcanon reigned supreme lol I made these for you! :D ♥

[cupidbedsy]

𝗳𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗶𝘇𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 "𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗺𝘆" ; 𝘤𝘣98 ୨୧

➪ summary: no one knows that y/n and connor are dating, so when her team finds her crying in the arms of connor, they can't help but get angry

➪ warnings: fights, jesper/timo being a little mean (protective)

➪ word count: 3.0k

➪ file type: fic - reupload

➪ sunny's notes: the reader is not related to anyone in this fic, everyone on the team just thinks of her as a little sister! the user of 'their/our girl' is strictly platonic unless its in reference to connor. anyway, yeah, i love this fic. i can't remember if this was based on anon idea or if this was just something i wrote but i remember writing it when i had a 100 followers (the first time around) and i'm just happy that i've grown both on my old blog and on this one. i love you all of you guys and thank you for sticking around through my madness <3

© cupidbedsy (sunflower-lilac42) ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

cb98 masterlist || nhl masterlist || taglist

Sitting on the bus, y/n looked at her phone, biting her fingernail. She was nervous, beyond nervous if you were to ask her. She wasn’t ready for anyone to find out, they had gone two years without anyone noticing and it could be revealed within seconds.

“You okay?” Luke sat down next to her, throwing his arm on the back of her seat. 

Y/n and Luke were the rookie two on the Devils, well, because they were both rookies. She was traded from the Canadiens not long after she was drafted, why? She would never know, but she couldn’t care now. 

“Nothing, why would something be wrong? Do I have a look on my face? Am I shaking?”

“No, but you’re talking fast and rambling.” Luke pointed out, his eyebrow-raising.

“Oh. I promise I’m fine.”

“Bull shit.” 

“Well, you know with Nico and Jack out, I’m just a little nervous about playing by myself.”

When y/n first started practicing with the team and even through her debut, she had always played with Jack or Nico. It wasn’t a conscious thing that Lindy had done but somehow she was always on the ice with one of them. When Nico got injured, she had played with Jack but when he got hurt during the Blues game she was nervous. She hadn’t played without them since and the thought of that was terrifying.

What made it worse, is that she was playing her boyfriend, the 2023 first overall pick. What made that worse, was that no one knew they were dating. Everyone had been raving, the past two first-overall picks were all playing on the ice.

“You’ll be okay, promise.”

“Y/n/n! Luke!” 

The girl turned her head to see Dawson standing at the front of the bus and they realized they were all alone, “Time for practice you two.”

“Ugh, I don’t want to.” Luke dragged her off the bus, following behind Dawson. 

Her phone rang as she went into the bathroom and she answered it, “Hi?”

“Hey babe.”

“Oh, hi Con!”

“Are you here yet?” Y/n nodded her head, forgetting that her boyfriend couldn’t see her, “Hello?”

“Yes, sorry. Luke and I just got off the bus.”

“I heard something about us filming a video or something, I don’t really know.”

The girl groaned, “Of course. Why can’t we-”

“Y/n/n hurry up!” Both she and Connor stopped talking at the voice, “Give me a second!” 

Whoever was behind the door, she couldn’t tell, walked away and y/n sat her phone down on speaker as she got changed, the two catching up. When she was done, the two said goodbye and she walked out, startled to see Luke standing there, “Oh!”

“So, who was that?” 

“Who was what?”

“The guy on your phone, dumbass.”

“Hey! Unnecessary roughness.” That had become an inside joke with her and the team. Whenever they were at practice and one of the guys accidentally shoved her a little too hard, she would always stop and call it ‘unnecessary roughness’. This happened both on and off the ice. 

“I’ll take your clothes, you go find your way to the ice.” Luke grabbed y/n’s clothes that she had changed out of to the clubhouse.

‘Find your way to the ice’ was an easy task, she had been to the United Center plenty of times. However, she purposely got lost in hopes of running into Connor, which was successful. She walked down the hallways, running into staff and other Hawks players who kindly waved at her. When she took a brief look at her phone, going to text the group chat that she was lost she ran into a chest.

“Connor!”

Connor looked down at the girl and smiled, “Hi.” She gave him a tight hug, some tears slipping out.

He pulled away, his smile turning into a frown. He placed his hands on her cheeks, wiping the stray tears, “What’s wrong, baby?”

She shook her head, “Nothing. I’m just so happy to see you. I haven’t seen you in months.” Connor wrapped his arms around his girlfriend once more, practically squeezing the life out of her, “It’s okay, I promise.”

They continued to hug for a few moments and when they finally pulled apart, y/n’s tears were still on her face. She went to dry her face off when a loud voice echoed down the hallway, “Hey!”

The two turned to see Jesper and Timo standing there, faces plastered with anger as they looked at their teammate/little sister with tears falling down her face. The two walked towards them and separated them, “Guys? You okay?”

Both their faces softened at y/n’s voice and looked down at her, “Shouldn’t we be asking you two that?”

“What do you mean?” Connor spoke up, his arms crossing over his chest. Now, the Devils and Hawks were not rivals. They had no affiliation with them and only played them twice a season, once at home and over in Chicago, so really the two shouldn’t have a reason to be mad at the two talking. If anything, they should be glad that their girl was making conversation with other NHL players besides themselves, especially one who was the same age as her, but Timo and Jesper’s faces tensed up at the 18-year-old’s voice, “I don’t know Bedard why don’t you tell us why our girl is crying? What did you say to her?”

Y/n went to defend her boyfriend but the two weren’t having it. Timo dragged the girl away from their teammate and Connor as she tried to get through to the two men. None of them listened once again and she couldn’t do much but give up. 

ﾟ+*:୨୧:*﹤

Throughout practice, y/n took her frustration out on her teammates and the puck. The boys exchanged looks with each other as practice went on, having no explanation for why she was acting like this. Lindy was confused as well and as soon as y/n ‘accidentally’ shoved Jesper into the boards, which also didn’t bode well with her since Jesper was 5’10” and weighed 175 pounds. As she ran into him, she tripped over both his and her skates, causing her to go flying to the boards as well. 

She let out a yelp in pain as she landed on her arm. It wasn’t anything serious but the initial action of her landing on it caused a big enough ache through her arm for her to verbally react to it. 

Connor had been watching from the stadium seats and winced when he saw it happen. He went to run down when he remembered Jesper’s words.

‘If I ever see you near her again, I wouldn’t mind getting a suspension.’

Sure it was a little harsh, but y/n was his teammate, his little sister, of course, he was going to be protective and so was everyone else on the team. 

The whole team crowded around y/n, the trainer pushing their way through the hoard of hockey players to assess the girl’s injury. As soon as they went to touch her arm, she shoved them off, “I’m fine.”

The trainer nodded their head, “I understand that but I still need to-”

Y/n got up and threw her gloves on the ground, “I said I’m fine!” She skated a little ways away and started moving her arm around, “See, I’m fine. I could punch someone if I fucking wanted to.” 

She continued her skate and got off the ice, heading for the locker room. She didn’t mean for her words to come out so harsh, nor did she mean to swear, but she was mad. Who were they to tell her who she could and couldn’t be around? They weren’t her keeper. 

Connor met her in front of the visiting clubhouse, “Are you okay?”

She nodded her head, having cooled off from her walk and it wasn’t him that she was mad at, “I’m gonna be so trash tomorrow.”

“Hey don’t say that, y/n/n. You’re going to be great!”

“But, Nico and Jack-”

“Nico and Jack have nothing to do with your performance. Sure they might enhance it, but you control how you play. Tomorrow you are going to kick ass, as much as I don’t want you to- not like that! I want you to do well it’s just that if you do well that means-”

Y/n cut him off with a kiss, “I know what you meant, Connie.”

Connor blushed and nodded his head. The two heard footsteps coming their way and immediately split up, heading back in their respective directions. 

ﾟ+*:୨୧:*﹤

Throwing on her suit, y/n got ready to head to the UC. She slicked her hair back into a ponytail and put her heels on. She headed down to the lobby of the hotel and waited in the corner, away from anyone else. She hadn’t talked to anyone since yesterday’s practice and she wasn’t planning on talking to anyone until she absolutely had to. 

She sat at the back of the bus instead of sitting next to Luke like she always did. She put her headphones in and listened to her holiday music, she didn’t care what anyone else said, holiday music made her happy. She could hear the quiet conversations around her through her headphones even though she tried to drown them out. 

Placing her headphones back into her pocket and stood up ready to get off the bus. She was stopped as soon as she was about to get off the bus by Vitek, who handed her a cup of coffee. Vitek was one of the players that she could never be mad at, he was adorable and no one could be mad at him. 

“Thanks, V.” She gave him a grateful smile and he returned one right back, letting her get off the bus. She ignored the cameras flashing as she walked to the clubhouse, following whoever had gotten off the bus in front of her. 

The team all went through their pregame rituals, getting ready for the game. No one attempted to talk to y/n, mostly because she was always nervous before games and any slight conversation made her even more nervous. 

During pregame, as they were practicing, everyone could tell something was off. The Devils knew something was off, Lindy knew something was off, the Hawks knew something was off, and even the fans knew something was off. They chalked it up to just the absence of Nico and the recent absence of Jack, they had lost their two-star players without much time apart.

Y/n stood between Dawson and Nathan during the National Anthem, making eye contact with Connor since he was ironically directly across from her. They slowly got through warmups and soon it was time for the game to start. 

Having faith, and assuming that she had a complete reset and she was back to normal, Lindy sent her out for the beginning face-off. She wanted to protest but she knew she couldn’t. She skated toward center ice and faced her boyfriend. The two sighed before bending down into position. Let’s just say, it was not a good start for the Devils. 

It was almost two minutes into the game and Taylor Hall had scored already. Y/n wasn’t on the ice when it happened, having changed lines just beforehand. She sighed amongst the others on the benches and leaned over and whispered into Toffoli's ear, “Can you get a penalty for checking your own teammate?”

Toffoli laughed, causing her to let one out as well. The bench looked at each with smiles on their faces, glad to see their girl smiling once again. 

Over halfway into the period and y/n had done jack-shit. No goals, no assists, no nothing. It was like she was invisible out there, well not really. She had gotten a few hits which was no big deal but normally, those wouldn’t have happened. She would have dodged them completely or softened the blow a little bit, but she just let them happen. 

When Dawson scored his first goal of the season she was on the ice with him. She skated fast and hugged him, so excited for him. That was the only other time she was happy during that period. Every other time she came off the ice she was so close to chucking her stick into a board or the bench itself, she was pissed off. She wanted to prove something to everyone and herself that she could do something without Nico or Jack, and right now, the only ones she was proving right were the ones who said she was trash from the start. 

ﾟ+*:୨୧:*﹤

During the first intermission, the Devils walked back somewhat happy, they were leading 2-1, Dawson had his first goal and so did Max Willman. Lindy spoke briefly about the first period and kept making little jabs towards y/n. None that were hurtful but ones that tried to ignite a spark in her for a second. 

That didn’t happen at all. The second period was worse than the last if that was even possible. Everyone could tell she was frustrated. Connor noticed it the most when she was on the ice with him. Her whole body was more tense, her shot was weak and floppy, and her passing was not on point. 

The second intermission was when Lindy stormed into the clubhouse, “What was that, y/l/n?!” 

The team snapped their heads up at their coach, they hadn’t heard him so mad at y/n before. 

“I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.”

“Damn right, it won’t happen again. You’re playing like shit.”

“Jeez, I know I suck, but you don’t have to frame it that way.” Y/n’s eyes watered up. 

Lindy knew she could play better, he was determined to make it that way, “You have to man up. You think Hischier gets off all high and dry when he plays like you are? You think Hughes is going to sit on his ass after a game when he did nothing all game? No.”

She looked at the team, looking for some support but she knew she didn’t deserve it, “You have got to put your personal issues aside, this team is what matters now. I don’t care who’s hanging out with who, who’s kissing who, who’s fighting who, I don’t care. You all get your heads in the game and get out there and play some hockey.”

The team was speechless, “Do you hear me?”

“Yes, coach/sir.”

ﾟ+*:୨୧:*﹤

Coming back for the third period, y/n was nervous, more nervous than before. Yet it seemed like Lindy’s speech worked. 

4:35 into the third period, y/n scored. John assisted and the team was elated for the girl. They patted her head and hugged her before she skated off to high-five the bench. And from the other side of the ice, even though his opponent just scored, Connor held a smile on his face, he was proud of his girl. 

Although, that wasn’t enough for y/n. If she was going to prove herself, she was going to prove herself. The team briefly faltered when Donato got his goal but right before the game ended, y/n got herself another goal, unassisted this time. 

Everyone was proud of her, especially Nico who was watching from home and Jack would be too when he was able to watch it, not knowing where he was at this moment. After the game everyone got changed back into their suits, doing some post-game interviews beforehand.

They wanted to celebrate but they weren’t going to go without y/n. They were going to go out for dinner but she declined nicely, saying she had other plans. The team looked confused as they stood outside talking with one another, but when someone all of a sudden came behind their teammate and picked her up and spun her around, the realization grew on their faces, Jesper and Timo becoming embarrassed.

They let the two have their moment for a little bit before someone cleared his throat, Luke. 

“Yes, Lukas?”

“Ooo, full name bud.”

Luke glared at everyone, “Aren’t you going to introduce us to your friend?”

“I think they’re more than friends.” Dawson snickered with Nathan as they stood behind everyone else.

“Right, guys this is Connor, Connor this is the team.”

“You watch yourself, Bedard.”

“Okay, we’re leaving, bye everyone!”

The two ran off before anyone could say anything else. They got into Connor’s car and drove to their new favorite restaurant, Culver’s.

ﾟ+*:୨୧:*﹤

•❅ 《 𝘉𝘖𝘕𝘜𝘚 𝘚𝘊𝘌𝘕𝘌 》 ❅•

“I don’t want to go.”

“I know, sweetheart, but think of it this way. The 22 I’m in Columbus, you’re in Detroit. I’ll drive there after the game and we can spend some of Thursday together before our games on Friday. And then about a month later we can visit for Christmas.”

“You’re gonna be so exhausted Connie.” 

“You’re worth it.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Connor gave y/n a kiss on the forehead, before kissing her cheek and her nose. She leaned in to kiss him on his lips yet was interrupted by a loud voice, “Y/n! You’re gonna miss our flight!”

She rolled her eyes, “How do they always manage to interrupt us?”

Connor shrugs and smiles, “Go on.”

“But would me missing the flight really be a bad thing?”

“Y/n!!”

“I’m coming, jeez!”

Connor kissed her and ushered her off, “Love you!”

“Love you too!”

𝗖𝗛𝗜𝗖𝗔𝗚𝗢 𝗕𝗟𝗔𝗖𝗞𝗛𝗔𝗪𝗞𝗦 𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧 ୨୧

@toasttt11 @chiblackhawks @pucks-goals-penalties @dancerbailey3 @petite-potato4 @absolutelyhugh3s @dyslecticdutchman

© cupidbedsy (sunflower-lilac42) ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

[eimids]

Loving you is all I need

Leah Williamson x reader fluff

Leah and reader get stuck in an elevator together while they are fighting.

this is just a quick blurb

warnings: slight angst but also fluff

Words:650

"Hold the door" You yelled as you ran to the elevators. You and Leah had been fighting the previous night so you were a bit late to training. Someone sticks their arm out of the elevator to keep the doors from closing.

"Oh.. hi Lee" You said when you realized who was in the elevator.

"Hi Y/n"She said coldly to you and pressed the button with number six on it.

"are you seriously still mad at me? You never call me by my name it’s always some nickname" You frowned a little.

"I'm not mad. Just disappointed. I thought you wanted to get married with me but guess not" Leah said sounding hurt.

"But I do want to-" You started when the elevator stopped. You fell to the ground from the sudden stop.

"Shit y/n/n, are you okay?" Leah asked clearly worried.

"Yeah I think I am but my ankle hurts a little" You answered. Leah didn't respond but started pushing different buttons to call to someone that the elevator stopped.

"It's not working. Fuck this. Why there would read that if you push that button it would call somewhere when it doesn't fucking work" Leah said panicking a little.

"Leah calm down. Come and sit with me. Soon someone will realize that we didn't show up to training." You said to the blond woman.

She sat down next to you and calmed her breathing. You sat there a while in an awkward silence until you spoke.

"I'm sorry that I said no to your proposal but you never really gave me a chance to explain myself. You just got sad and left" You started.

"Well can you explain now. Whe have been together for 3 years and we have known each other for ten so what's the problem here? Or do you just not love me anymore?" Leah asked shyly.

"Oh Lee nothing like that. I love you so much and you know that. I won't ever leave your side. But it's just.. You remember how messy the divorce was between me and ex. It wasn't good for anyone and my mental health went so low. I just don't want to go through that again" You answered with tears in the corners of her eyes.

"Sweet I would never hurt you. I wouldn't cheat you like she did. I will do anything to protect you and I just want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to have kid's with you and I want to grow old with you. I don't want to spend another day alone. All I want is you my love"

"Okay then ask me " You said quietly.

"Huh?" Leah asked confused.

"Aske me again" You said again and Leah flipped you to sit on her lap. She looked right in your eyes and asked.

"Y/f/n. Will you marry me?" Leah asked smiling.

"Yeah" You answered laughing and crying and then kissed the blonde.

You sat there kissing passionately a while, own bubble. Suddenly the elevator started moving again and you had to snap back to reality.

Soon the doors opened and Leah stood up, then helping you. You then walked to the team room. You were limping and Beth came running to you.

"Oh My God. Are you guys okay?" Beth asked worried, Viv by her side.

"Better than ever." You said smiling. Then you looked at Leah and kissed her.

"Sooo we have some news for you guys" You started.

"Don't say you too are leaving Arsenal" McCabe said quickly.

"What, no! Why would you think that?" Leah asked laughing.

"I just saw a dream about it. Did you guys know th-" Katie started but Buv interrupted her.

"Just tell us the news" Viv said inpatient.

You looked at each other and said.

"We are getting married"

[elliezlils11utt]

scars:

TW: SH MENTIONS AND DARKER TOPICS ‼️

WARNING : this fic tackles a serious topic that may cause harm. if you feel like you are not in the right headspace, please do not read this fic in any way. and this fic is IN NO WAY romanticizing self harm. this fic was made strictly for comfort purposes. I write when I get the urge and this fic brings me comfort, so I’d thought I’d share it. ‼️

A/N: I’ve been struggling recently so I whipped this bad boy up, I needed some Ellie comfort or I felt like I was finna explode😍🙏🏽

Summary: Ellie finds fresh sh marks on your thighs during sex and comforts you </33

your mind goes foggy as guilt bubbles up in your throat. you love the feeling of Ellie’s lips trailing down your body. but you can’t shake the guilty feeling that fills ur lungs with every breath you intake. see, Ellie knows in your past you went through rough patches and doing some shit to your body that you didn’t mean. she knows about your scars. when she first found out you hurt yourself, it was your first time with her. she pulled down ur pants to reveal your old scars that sat in your thigh. she paused for a moment before turning to you and she just kissed them repeatedly. her hands ran over the bumps of the scars as she gave them little kisses. she didn’t say anything about it in fear of overstepping in the moment. but the next morning when u woke up in her arms she kissed your forehead and told you that if you ever felt like u wanted to harm yourself again you would let her know. that’s how you got into this situation. a couple months later and shit got tough. you don’t know how to cope with your emotions properly, turning to self harm as your source of comfort. you knew it was wrong, you knew you should have called her, talked about it, talked to her. maybe if you would’ve done that you wouldn’t have done it. maybe. so now here we are, with her head trailing in between your thighs. if she were to she the fresh marks how would she think of you then? As soon as she starts unbuttoning your pants your head starts spinning.

“fuck Ellie, Ellie, stop” you push her hands away, and turn to face the opposite direction to her.

“what, baby did I do something wrong?”

“no, no it’s jus-“ tears swell up in your eyes, your vision going blurry. your words choke up in your throat.

“baby are you okay?” She scoots closer to you slightly rubbing your back as you sobbed into your palm. she asks you what’s wrong and you can’t get words out.

“remember when we first got together? remember my scars? When you told me if I ever felt like I needed to hurt myself to talk to you?”

Ellie pauses, for a second before nodding.

“I didnt. I’m sorry.” you sob.

“oh baby.” she pulls you closer to her, hugging you tightly. you cry into her arms. she lays her head on you, rubbing small circles into your back.

“it’s okay love, your okay. Just don’t do it again baby. I can’t stand the thought of you causing harm to your skin baby.” she comforts you. you slur countless apologizes into her chest.

“it’s okay.” you and her stay like that for what feels like ages. just being in her arms. her holding you. it feels safe there.

Text CONNECT to 741741 for free, 24/7 help for self-harm

A/N: to anyone who relates or has gone through something like this I just want to say that I’m proud of you. It takes so much fuckin courage jst to not let go. your worth it. every day ur clean means something. self harm is a serious topic that’s highly frowned upon, but in reality everyone that has gone through thoughts of self harm or done it just need an outlet that can’t be found anywhere else. it’s a escaping mechanism for people who don’t have any other way to escape. but there are other ways to handle emotions, and harming your body should not be one of them. you are loved, and I’m proud of you loves.

[bahablastplz]

All In | Chapter 7.5 (Changbin)

pairing: Lee Felix x f!reader (mafia au)

summary: You didn't know what you were getting yourself into when you started dating Yang Jungwon, notorious mafia boss. Your life gets flipped upside down when you're found beaten and bloody by SKZ, the rival mafia group, and you're quickly integrated into their lives. What will happen when you try to leave your old life behind and start anew?

chapter summary: Changbin knows what it's like to be weak but he has people he needs to protect. How did Changbin come to join SKZ?

warnings: please see series masterlist for all warnings

series masterlist ~~ series taglist ~~ main masterlist

“You’re weak,” he laughed at me. 

When I was in fourth grade, I had gotten the shit beaten out of me when I stood up for my older sister. This guy in her grade was constantly berating her, picking on her, making her feel less than. One time too many she had come home crying and I decided enough was enough. 

It didn’t go as planned, of course. He was two years older than me, and so I wasn’t able to stand up for her the way I had wanted to. I had gotten pulverized, more or less, but the relentless torment of my sister had stopped. Mission success? 

The night I had gotten beaten up, my sister tended to my wounds in our family bathroom. “Stupid,” she had scolded as she wiped blood from my upper lip. “You should know better. I never want you to get hurt again.” 

“Don’t tell Ma,” I had pleaded. Our mother would be sick out of her mind with worry if she saw me covered in blood and bruises. 

Our mother was a headstrong, independent woman that had raised us well. Our father had taken off when I was just a baby and I was still too young to remember him, but his existence continued to sour the taste in our mouths to this very day. Since then, our mother had been a provider, working day and night in order to give us everything that we needed. She was overworked, anybody could see that much, but she wanted to make sure she gave her children a long and healthy life. 

It was that night that I had vowed that I would become stronger. For her. For my sister. For our family. I would work hard and make sure that I would never get hurt again, but that I was strong and that I could protect my family. 

I went out looking for work the very next day. Believe it or not, nobody really looks to hire you if you’re in the fourth grade. But try as I might, I went to every business in town and begged them to hire me. I was persistent, in fact. 

“Why would we hire ya, kid?” one older man had spit at me. “With arms like yours, ya would only be a burden. You can’t lug around a potato if you tried.” I was ridiculed for even trying. But try as I might, day in and day out I would show up every morning begging for work, rain or shine. 

One day, my luck had finally passed. I guess it was their busy season or something, because when I showed up to his shop at opening I was immediately thrust into work. It was all physical labor and sure, he was right about me not having the strength or stamina yet to truly be of help. But, I had the determination and perseverance. I never complained once, and though I was slower than some of his other workers, he gave me another chance the next day when I came back. 

And so, that’s how I acquired my first job. And though my body wasn’t fully equipped for it yet, it certainly became equipped over time. Though I was small, my body started bulking up and giving me the strength to lift hundreds of pounds of materials each and every day. 

By the time I reached high school age, I was working 60 hours a week and bringing home hundreds of dollars in cash. My Ma always made it a big thing when I tried to give her the money; I never kept any of it for myself. But I needed her to know I had it handled. If it were up to me, she would never have to work another day of her life and I would provide for us and we would live happily ever after. 

It wasn’t long before I got greedy. People wanted me for my strength, after all. But once I found out that underground fighting was a thing… It was almost like I had forgotten about my vow years ago to never let Ma see me get hurt, to never have my sister have to patch me up again. I was leagues above the others, with my physique that I had spent years skillfully crafting. I never told my family the nature behind my new job, but all it entailed was me beating the crap out of other people. And people always bet on me, and they would always win of course. My technique was a little rusty at first but what I lacked in skill I more than made up for in strength. And when I wasn’t fighting and bringing home money, I was in the gym training. 

It wasn’t enough. Just a little more. Once I was stronger, I’d be able to protect them. 

Never mind the fact that I didn’t get to see much of my Ma or sister anymore, as I was always in the ring or in the gym. All that mattered was that I was powerful. That I had something to show for it. 

One day when I showed up to the ring, there was a large crowd and a lot of murmurs that I had never heard before. A new opponent? Nobody had dared to challenge me in eons. But here he was… a man that had a few inches on me in height, but definitely not in raw strength. They called him Chan? I had never heard that name before, so he must be new. 

One thing’s for sure, and that I was confident that this was a fight I could win. 

“Changbin, right? Why don’t we turn this into a bet?” He had asked me. 

I scoffed in his face. “Don’t make me laugh,” I told him. “You’re going to lose enough already, no? Do we really need to bring down your pride, your ego and whatever cash you have in your pocket? Let me do you a favor and spare you here and now.” 

The man only grinned in return. I could tell he was cocky and that only pissed me off. My adrenaline was already ready to go. 

“How about this. If I win, you’ll consider joining me and my team,” he had said. 

“Your team… Yeah, sure buddy. Whatever you say. What about when I win?” 

“If you win, Changbin, I’ll give you 10,000 dollars in cash.” My face blanched and my blood ran cold. He couldn’t be serious. He was that confident in himself?

“You’re on, man. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” We stepped into the ring and I cracked my jaw and knuckles in anticipation. I barely noticed the crowd getting larger and larger around us as we prepared. 

The makeshift ref blew their whistle and counted us down. “3… 2… 1… Go!” And we were off. I was in my element, of course. Years of training would finally pay off, I thought to myself. 

I barely had time to register how fast he was when the whistle blew. In half a second, he was across the ring and in front of my face. I blinked and saw a fist swinging for my face but had just enough time to duck, meeting his jaw with an uppercut. He took it like a champ, of course. Never had I seen someone that wasn’t instantly knocked out by the force of one of my uppercuts. I would usually save that for a finishing move, but today there was something on the line. 

He stepped back, his hand cradling his jaw for a second as he took me in. He smiled at me. Usually by now, once my opponent is humbled they would make a last-ditch effort to swing and swing, getting messy in an attempt to stake their claim and win. I saw none of that with Chan. His eyes were sharp, calculating, and for a second I almost felt like prey. 

“You’re strong,” he noted. “That’s why I want you.” 

“You and everyone else,” I told him. “Tell me something I don’t know.” 

I lunged forward, aiming for his stomach but I’m met with air. He dodged my blow? Stumbling forward, I wasn’t expecting to be swept off my feet. I didn’t even see him move! How could he have knocked me off balance that easily? 

Squinting, I saw the flash of his shadow moving. He jumped, making to tackle me to the ground but I read him too quickly. I rolled to my side, noticing when he made contact with the ground instead of my frame. ‘Two can play that game,’ I had thought. 

I’m on my feet in an instant, taking a defensive stance. 

“You’re loyal to a fault,” he said. “A family man. You’re protective, a caregiver. You want to be able to provide.” 

“How do you know all this?” I panted. I hadn’t had a fight in the ring this long in years. 

“I make it my business to know things,” he provided unhelpfully. “The top fighter in the city? Definitely my business.” I rolled my eyes at that. 

He moved forward and lunged with a right swing which I dodged with an arm. I reached to grab him but failed and instead was met with a blow right to my stomach that I had left unprotected. Holy shit. What muscle was this guy hiding? I coughed and sputtered and barely registered the sound of the crowd coming to a roar. 

He lifted up his leg as if to kick me and I was thrown into yet another defensive attack, throwing my arms up. I instinctively swung back but he wasn’t there–he had used the momentum from his kick to crouch to the ground, springing up to land an uppercut straight to my nose. I heard a loud crack before everything went dark. 

Chan later told me that I had been unconscious for about an hour. When I woke up, the crowd had dispersed and my coach was yelling at me about all the money I had lost him. Chan, in all his glory, had stayed until I was conscious again. 

I groaned. 

“So about my team,” he said, cracking a grin. “You want to be strong? You want to know how to protect your family, how to protect your mother and sister that you care so much about? There are things they need protecting from that you don’t even know about yet. They’ll be safe if you join SKZ, but if you don’t… bad things will happen to them. Let me tell you about it. Join me for a walk.” 

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

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[oroontheheels]

There’s an old saying “with friends like these who need enemies”.

And I’m seeing so much bullshit regarding symbrock recently 🫠

Guys… you obviously read comics and i respect that as a reader you have a right for interpretation. But then you say things like this and…

Huh??

Let me give you a few examples of “symbiote not giving a shit about Eddie”.

Погнали! (Let’s go)

Venom not giving a shit about Eddie that’s why he breaks him out of the prison after being separated by authorities (aka Eddie clearly lost the battle, but Venom still wants him and him only)

Venom not giving a shit about Eddie that’s why they decide to live together on a tropical island and symbiote initiates conversation about beauty of nature with him.

I don’t remember what came first “Separation Anxiety” or “Planet of the Symbiotes”. But let’s starts from - again - Venom being separated from Eddie but even though he can find suitable hosts he still wants Brock.

There’s no scientific explanation like in the movies. He can bond with whoever. He can bend hosts to his will if he must and wear them as meat bag. He doesn’t. He wants Eddie.

And last piece of media I will bother myself with finding (cause there’s 172727272 more) Is famous “Planet of the Symbiotes” where Eddie’s harsh words and sudden break-up made Venom let out a screech of such anguish it affected living being around the area (making them cry and even worsening their depression in some cases to the point of offing themseves).

This is the pain Venom felt when he was rejected by Eddie.

These are early comics. Venom gave a fuck. Even though his nature (good or bad) remained somewhat ambiguous and mostly depended on author. Venom cared about Eddie and have chosen Eddie again and again. Even when they kept loosing battles. Even if there was a stronger host.

All that bullshit with “Venom don’t want Eddie” started in “Hunger (2003)”. During 2000. A very edgy era in general and this comics was no exception. Yeah, this comics indeed stated that “Venom never liked Eddie he only ever wanted Spiderman”. But that comics was OOC and full of bullshit but it was canon of 616 and they just rolled with it.

As you remember Eddie got cancer and was abandoned by his other. Because something-something Spider-Man’s adrenaline glands are tastier. (🤡)

But this lack of feelings was “debunked” in comics “Spider-man: New ways to die”. Where Eddie tried to straight up murder the symbiote but lost and when Mac Gargan (Venom host at the moment) tried to finish him off Venom interfered.

Dunno about you guys, but it kinda seems to me that in old comics Venom symbiote gave significant amount of fuck about Eddie Brock. 🤔🤔🤔

[goldencuffs]

afterglow

inspired by the spectral files series by s.e. harmon!!

The ghost appears in his office after Damen comes back from his lunch break. 

Damen’s had a rough week already. The free pad thai in his belly right now is literally the best thing that’s happened to him in months. That’s not even an exaggeration.

The ghost in his office has been around before. He showed up a few weeks ago, at the start of summer, his expression boyish, sunny, hands in his pockets as he’d surveyed Damen’s office with visible interest. Then he had followed Damen to the kitchen and watched him make tea. And then he had pulled faces last Tuesday, during their morning briefings, gagging at the photos of Victor Reynold’s dismembered body. 

“I smell Thai,” the ghost says now. He’s pouting. “I want Thai. I love Thai food.” 

Damen ignores him, sitting behind his desk and logging into his computer. It’s only twelve in the afternoon. Damen wants to throw himself off the ledge of the building. 

The ghost struts about his office, still talking, listing off the other cuisines he loves (Mexican, Indian, Lebanese, Italian) as Damen pretends to read his latest case notes.

“Not going to lie though, definitely shat myself when I had that. I’m talking blocked pipes and everything.” The ghost shakes his head. “Man, that was a rough weekend.”

Damen sighs. 

The ghost perks up. “I know you can see me, man. You always get that face when I’m talking to you.”

Damen picks up a pen, just so he has something to do. So he can school his face into something more neutral. 

Of course Damen can see the ghost. He sees ghosts all the time. He’s seen them since he was seven years old. As a kid, he didn’t know the children he would play with were dead until Nikandros’ foot had gone through the football they were kicking around. 

Since then, Damen’s seen them everywhere. There was a widow who used to hang around Kastor’s old place, shrilly telling him off for painting the kitchen the wrong colour. Kastor had moved out three weeks after Damen had told him that. 

Most of the time, ghosts leave him alone. Sometimes they get excited when they realise he can see them. Sometimes they just want to talk. Some of them have harmless requests, like messages they want to pass on to a loved one.

And sometimes there are ghosts like the ones in his office, who don’t seem to have anywhere to go, who only seem to be attached to him.

The last ghost like that had been Aimeric Gaul, this skinny, baby-faced kid who had sad, wide eyes. He could only go where Damen could, and kept mentioning how much he missed his mother. 

Three months into watching Aimeric cry in the corner of his office, Damen had driven down to Fortaine to see his mother. Aimeric had sat in the front seat, wide-eyed as he watched the rolling landscape.

When Damen had told Aimeric’s mother that he had a message from her dead son, her husband had pointed a gun to his forehead and said, Get the fuck off my property.

Damen was placed on suspension after that.

So, yeah. He’s wary of the ghosts like this—the ones that are, inevitably, drawn to him. They’re the ones that cause trouble. 

Damen’s been through enough, thanks. He’s only just back from his suspended time off, and Jokaste has cleared the last of her things from their place, and sometimes he still panics when he can’t find the ring on his left hand, until he remembers that it’s shoved in a drawer in his closet. 

The ghost is still talking. “You know what I really miss though? Dumplings. Highly underrated, man. When’s the last time you had one? Take it from me—have as many dumplings as you can while you’re still alive. ‘Cause, one day you’re gonna be dead, and there’s no fucking dumplings here. Which is shit if you think about it, the least—”

Damen’s phone rings. He picks it up, glad for the distraction. 

Makedon’s voice is no-nonsense. “My office, now. Bring coffee.” And then he hangs up. 

Damen deliberately doesn’t bring the coffee. Makedon frowns at him, but doesn’t say anything else. 

He pushes a file towards him. “Welcome back, kid. Latest cold case is all yours.”

Damen groans. “Seriously? You’re assigning me to cold cases? What about Reynold’s murder? I hear they need more manpower.”

“Nah.” Makedon shakes his head. “Don’t think you’re in the right headspace for all that shit.” 

“That shit?” Damen repeats, frowning. “You mean, my job?”

Makedon stares at him for a few beats. “This is part of your job too, detective. Everyone gets assigned cold cases every now and then.”

“Bullshit,” Damen snaps. “You haven’t assigned me a real case in months, even before—” And here, he falters, too ashamed to bring up Aimeric. 

Makedon isn’t a soft man. Everything about him is rigid and unmoveable. But he does relax his shoulders a little. 

“This isn’t just about what happened in Fortaine. When’s the last time you slept, kid?”

Damen frowns.

“Yeah, exactly. Divorce ain’t easy, and it’s clearly been affecting you more than you realise. You’re so… angry all the time. You clocked the new intern so badly last week, he had to go home early.”

Damen sighs, heart twisting a little. Yeah, okay, yelling at Erasmus in front of everyone hadn’t been a good move, but Damen had his reasons.

…He just can’t remember them right now. 

“Work the case with Huet,” Makedon continues, “He’s good company, and isn’t afraid to step up.” 

Damen snatches the file. “Whatever,” he mutters darkly. “What’s the case?”

Makedon sighs. “Some kid drove himself into a lake about a decade ago. Was conclusively claimed as a suicide at the time, but his brother’s statement is pretty interesting, suggests foul play.”

Damen’s eyebrows raise. “Murder?”

Makedon shrugs. “The brother was thirteen at the time, and very close with the victim. So it could be an emotional thing. But…”

“But?”

“He pointed fingers at their uncle. Claimed he had strong evidence it could be a murder, but no one really looked into it too closely.”

“Hmm,” Damen says. “So, what, we’re supposed to go on the word of a teenager?”

“A very persistent teenager. Have a look—he’s called at least several times a year to see if the case has been reopened.”

“No shit,” Damen says in surprise. “He actually share any of this evidence, though? Or tell us why the uncle could be the perpetrator?” 

“That’s your job to find out.” Makedon yawns. “Where’s my fucking coffee?”

But Damen doesn’t pay attention to him. The first page of the case file is a headshot of the victim. 

Damen knows that face. He just left him in his office.

***

Auguste Henri Revere is—was—twenty-five when he died. 

He was incredibly popular, well-liked, and good at pretty much everything he did. Damen reads everything in his file: football captain, scholarship student at Arles University, part-time volunteer at the children’s hospital…

He doesn’t seem like the guy who would kill himself. Then again, the worst part about this job has always been that people can surprise you—in the worst ways possible. 

Nothing about his death is suspicious. It happened close to midnight, near a popular stretch of road in the city centre. There were several witnesses that saw a cream 1972 Ford Mustang veer off the road, straight into the lake. Police found a suicide note typed on Auguste’s laptop. He had cleaned his room the night before, donated things like clothes, jewellery, and sneakers. 

Damen reads what Laurent Gabriel Revere said. Now that statement is strange. Laurent was thirteen when Auguste died. Sources say they were close, that Auguste doted on him, especially since they were orphans, living with their uncle. Two years after Auguste died, Laurent showed up at the police station and accused their uncle of killing Auguste. He claimed he had evidence, but failed to elaborate. Witnesses said they had heard Laurent and his uncle fighting at the Revere home just half an hour before Laurent showed up at the police station. 

Police issued a search warrant at the Revere house. His uncle had readily complied. Nothing had been found. Nothing had been found in Auguste’s recovered car either. And there was never an autopsy done on his body. 

“Huh,” Damen says. 

He looks up at Auguste, who’s staring at the view outside his floor-to-ceiling windows. For the first time since he showed up in his office, Damen feels sorry for him. Auguste is twelve years older than him, but now here he is, forever twenty-five. Damen’s older than him now, and it’s strange to think about. What makes him more deserving of life? He isn’t even a good person—not the way Auguste is. Was. 

It’s not the most conventional way to start an investigation, but hey, he might as well. “How’d you die?” Damen asks.

Auguste turns to him blinking. His eyebrows raise. “That’s the first thing you say to me after all this time? Jesus, that’s cold, man.”

Damen bites his bottom lip. “Do you remember the day you died? Did you… er.” He can’t bring himself to say kill yourself. 

“The day I died? Hmm.” Auguste’s golden eyebrows furrow. “Let me see… I took Laurent out that day. We went to the fair, and he kept pretending he was too old to go on the rides.” His smile turns fond. “Then we… I dropped him home. I went to meet some friends but I don’t think I made it.”

“Fuck!” Damen scrambles up from his seat, and he’s grateful that his office door is closed. He doesn’t think he could explain to anyone why he’s so horrified. 

Blood streaks down from Auguste’s mouth, the corner of his eyes. His clothes are soaked through, turning transparent. His golden hair is matted and wet against his scalp.

Auguste moans. “I don’t feel so good. I don’t… I can’t talk about this anymore.” 

The blood starts pouring out of his ears. 

Damen stands, paralysed, unable to move. 

And then in a blink, Auguste disappears.

***

“Damn,” Huet says. “How much do you think this place will sell for? Three mill right? I mean, at least.” 

“Shut up,” Damen says. Huet is a new recruit and he is far too peppy and talks far too much. He is definitely not good company. 

Privately, Damen agrees about the house. It’s huge, a sprawling mansion adorned with steep, gabled peaks and chimneys, topped with slate tiles that glisten in the sunlight.  Ivy and climbing roses cling to the walls. As well as being Superman, Auguste was also apparently incredibly rich. 

The man who opens the door is undoubtedly related to Auguste. It’s the eyes—Damen has been staring at those blue eyes in photos and in his office for weeks now.

Richard Revere is in his mid-fifties. His hair is dark, coiled, and his beard is trimmed and peppered with white. There are rings on each of his fingers—giant gemstones that glisten as he shakes Damen and Huet’s hands as they introduce themselves.

He has no qualms about being questioned and invites them in. 

Damen’s eyebrows raise. They’re greeted by a grand foyer with a sweeping marble staircase, its balustrade intricately wrought iron, leading to the upper floors. The interior is a blend of opulence and warmth, with high ceilings, ornate moldings, and crystal chandeliers casting a soft glow over the richly decorated rooms. Antique furniture, plush draperies, and elegant tapestries fill the spaces, each room telling its own story of centuries past.

Richard has no issues with them being in his house. Damen has done this for long enough to go by his gut—and so far this man doesn’t seem like a murderer. He just seems like a rich man from an affluent society. 

Richard makes them tea, and then says, “So. You’ve opened my nephew’s case again?”

“We have,” Damen says. They’re sitting on the most comfortable armchairs he’s ever been, in a room with far too many books and far too many globes. 

“Interesting.” Richard sips his tea. For the first time, his tone is cold, disapproving. “May I ask why? I believe the last set of detectives were incredibly thorough.”

Damen nods. “I’m sure they were. But you understand we’re in a delicate position. We can’t brush off… certain statements.”

“Ah.” Richard’s mouth quirks in amusement. “So this is about Laurent, then.” 

It’s Huet who nods this time. He says, “He called the last leading detective just six months ago, sir. He’s still adamant about…” He awkwardly trails off. 

Now Richard looks very amused. “Oh, I see. Of course. Did you know Laurent happens to make those calls to the police station every time we have a fight?” 

“Well,” Damen says, as Huet makes a note of that. “We’d like to talk to him too. Is he around?”

“He is.” Richard nods. “Upstairs, sleeping.”

Damen doesn’t react when Auguste appears in the living room. He looks like his usual self, dry and golden, free of blood. 

“You need to go upstairs,” Auguste says, and for the first time, there’s a note of frustration in his voice. “I can only go where you go. I want to go upstairs. I want to see my room. I want to see Laurent.” 

“We’ll come back later then,” Damen says. He ignores Auguste’s No! 

Richard leads them back out into the sunlight. Auguste trails after them, eyes flicking over every inch of the house, his gaze wondrous. It fills Damen with pity. 

They make their goodbyes out on the porch. Damen can see some of the neighbours take interest in their police car, but Richard seems unfazed. 

A portly woman at the end of the driveway asks them, “Laurent again? He’s a shame to the Revere name.”

Huet raises both eyebrows. Damen makes a mental note of that.

As they walk to the car, they hear a frantic, whispered. “Hey!”

Auguste gasps. “Laurent.” 

Damen follows his eyes. There’s a window at the side of the house on the second level. Someone’s opened it up enough to wave at them. 

Damen steps closer. Auguste rushes up to the window. “Laurent!” 

Laurent doesn’t hear his brother. But he does notice Damen approaching and beckons him over. 

Damen stands under the window, shoulder to shoulder with a dead man, and looks up at the most beautiful person he’s ever seen. 

Laurent’s hair is golden, falling across those same stunning, blue eyes, his lashes long and dark. His skin is luminous and sweetly pink. 

“Damn,” Huet says under his breath. 

“He’s so grown up,” Auguste whispers. 

“You’re here for Auguste’s case?” Laurent says. 

Damen has to strain to hear him. Laurent’s voice is low, anxious, like he’s worried about being caught. 

“Yeah, we are.” Damen clears his throat, which is suddenly scratchy.

Something bright sparks in Laurent’s eyes. He’s still whispering. “Great. You think you can meet me at the diner down the road in an hour? I can’t get away until he leaves the house.”

That instantly sets alarm bells in Damen’s head. He frowns. 

“God, he looks so different,” Auguste says.

Damen nods at Laurent, who’s still anxious, still waiting for a response. 

“Okay, we’ll see you.”

Laurent nods and shuts the window, disappearing from view. After a moment, Auguste does too. 

[getvalentined]

Thinking about how about half a year ago this video came out and I got to this bit:

And I literally said, very quietly to myself "...No. No way. They didn't—they wouldn't."

Because we've seen this scene before, right? In a thousand anime, a million movies, we've all seen the teenagers looking at fireworks together, and one turns to the other to say something, sees the look on their friend's face and stops, because that look on their friend's face is more precious and important than anything they could have to say. That moment when they realize something about themselves, or confirm something about themselves.

We've seen this scene before, but I couldn't fathom that this was intentional. Even having played Scarlet and Violet, where Nemona looks at the player and essentially says "my treasure is you," I couldn't imagine that was what they wanted from this scene—after all, she has the same line in-game regardless of whether you're playing a boy or a girl. The queer implications aren't unintentional, per se, it's just that it's less work to let her have the same dialogue regardless. I never assumed it was set up with a female player character in mind, because why would it be?

But this scene...that's just Juliana. A custom Juliana design, no less! But they didn't mean it that way, they couldn't have meant it. This is the largest media franchise in the world. There was no way.

...And then this happened immediately after:

And I literally started crying because yes, yes they did, they would and they did, holy shit.

"My treasure is you."

I know a lot of younger LGBTQ+ folk don't understand what a huge deal this is, but it is a huge fucking deal. I'm old enough that I remember when too much implication of queerness in popular media could get a series shut down entirely, so I'm always blown away when I see even an inkling of representation in a major media franchise—even if it's definitely just a matter of programming convenience.

This is absolutely not just convenience, this is completely intentional and equally overt, and over half a year later I still get super emotional thinking about it.

What a time to be alive.

Happy Pride, y'all.

[rachetmath]

Pyrrha: Hi you must be Alyx.

Alyx: Yes.

Pyrrha: Well I just want to talk to you about something.

Alyx: I mean sure but what-

Pyrrha: Not what. It’s who. You know Jaune Arc?

Alyx: I mean y-

Pyrrha: You know the Rustud Knight? The one you betrayed? Who you poisoned?

Alyx: Well I can- *attempts to run*

Penny: *blocks her path*Nope. All attempts of escape are at zero right now.

Alyx: You can’t be serious.

Penny: As the current generation would say," Oh yes bitch. Try me."

Alyx: Okay I may have wronged him a little bit.

Lewis: A little? You completely poisoned him.

Alyx: Lewis you are not helping.

Lewis: At least like Jaune I was trying. But you never listen.

Alyx: Look I understand but what’s the big deal? He got back to Remnant.

Pyrrha: Why?! Why did you do it?

Alyx: I mean… well… I… um….

Pyrrha: Alyx, understand, you have two deadly women on both sides of you. If you don’t give us a good explanation well…. I guess we’ll finally see if you can fall from heaven.

Alyx: Well I saw this vision and I didn’t like it.

Penny: Understood, what was the vision?

Alyx: Um… I *whisper* don’t remember.

Penny: You what?!

Alyx: I don’t remember okay?!

Pyrrha: What vision? Who’s vision?

Alyx: I don’t know. The writers didn’t give me anything. I saved him though. That counts, right?

Pyrrha: No. He just survived.

Penny: Plus your ‘help’ could give him problems down the road.

Alyx: Like what?

Me: I mean the fan base speaks for itself. I mean the guy hasn’t been in Remnant for years it’s going to be kind of hard for him to readjust. Not only that he has to recover from years of isolation, PTSD, trauma, and because of you he might as well also be having trust issues. Not only that he had to leave another friend behind. You and the Ever After might as have shattered him

Alyx: Oh Oum.

Pyrrha: Yeah. Oum can’t save you. Penny.

Penny: Way ahead of you.

Alyx: Wait you wouldn’t hurt an innocent black child right?

Pyrrha and Penny: ………..

Me: Alyx you heard the saying, “Equal rights equal fights.”

Alyx: Let’s say I don’t.

Me: No matter your race. No matter your sexuality. No more matter your gender or age. You made a choice to do what you do. And as a result of said choice you must face said consequences. Weither they be good or bad. Basically you may be a kid but you were grown enough commit murder. And as such-

Pyrrha: You have this coming.

Alyx: *crying* I’m sorry. I just wanted to home. Jaune had no idea how. So I did what ever took. And then the Cat betrayed me and I died. Please? Don’t hurt me!

Summer: Come now ladies. I know you’re both upset but-

Pyrrha: Ms. Rose! Shut up!

Summer: I’m sorry? Who are you talking to?

Pyrrha: You are a nobody. You have been irrelevant for a while now. You left your daughters and died. Your daughter ain’t shit. Your team is still disbanded even after you died. You might as well be an afterthought at this point.

Summer: Said the girl who’s only job was to run away.

Pyrrha: I went out in a blaze of glory. I proved myself. What the fuck have you done?

Summer: Um.

Penny: Friend Pyrrha I know I have no rights to talk.

Pyrrha: Damn straight. You suffered more than myself. All you had to do was live. Instead, you traumatized my man. He just got over me too. Why would you do that?

Penny: Okay, I’m sorry. But, he’s going to be fine now. Let’s just let her go. And we pray he gets better.

Pyrrha: Fine. You're lucky Alyx.

Alyx: Thank you. But I am sorry.

Pyrrha: Shut up. Oum damn. If this story continues he better get stronger and kill Cinder. Because this is stupid. I mean how much trauma does one guy need? How he is not a villain? I mean, come on, he can’t be like Yuji, he doesn’t have skills like that.

Penny: Well friend W-

Pyrrha: If you say her name I will end you.

Summer: Okay woah, it’s been nine volumes why are you mad about this?

Pyrrha: One; he deserves better. Two; I prefer your daughter or anyone else than her. Three; she’s fucking useless. And four; it took him being an old man for her to start liking him. Fuck that bitch.

Summer: Well like said, if you stayed alive then-

Pyrrha: If you stayed alive maybe Qrow would have stopped drinking. If you stayed alive maybe your baby daddy wouldn’t be in a state of depression. Maybe if you stayed alive you could help your daughter learn how to control her eyes and be less useless in fighting the Queen of Grimm.

Summer: That was uncalled for.

Pyrrha: Move along side character.