#i spent so long typing this
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#boops arent violent enough#now smack......#smack is some looney tunes type shit#i spent so long on this#boop#rambles
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i love normal guys doomed by the narrative
#either that or hilariously dysfunctional or both#tf one#orion pax#d 16#megop#megatron#optimus prime#my art#saw one post pointing out in the trailer that a like5 frame shot of megatrons cannon that was snuck between their mahoushoujo type transfor#mations and like.messed up deeply messed up u see how goofy best friends orion and megsy are theyre just silly guys but in every telling of#their story they always end up enemies ok like in a meta multiverse hopping way think about it.like oh my god prewar tfp megop was already j#juicy and earthspark divorced-remarried megop is like.RGHFH tf one is going to destroy me bc this is what they had Before do u get me#before the war before they fell apart before friends became enemies and hands were stained before the beginning of the end im so so normal#like ok.this silly tight goofy buddy dynamic thats shown in tf one so far is.is what they had before. its what they could have kept if only#if only things turned out differently. but in every world optimus prime and megatron end up leading opposite sides of the bloodiest war ever#ok.its a universal fact and everyone who knows any transformers knows this BUT THE CHARACTERS DONT THEYRE POWERLESS TO PREVENT IT#ill clean up these tags in the morning but like im so.so normal about fictional robot guys#anyway i was intending to draw a background for this but i got lazy and also spent too long on the hands!!!!so whatever
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Zelda goes mushroom girl
#tloz#a link to the past#zelda#link#my art#I was happy with that first one but for some reason decided it still needed a companion piece so I spent way too long on that second one...#I don't think there was any time during the progress where I was happy with it but hfduhdfu at least I got to Attempt drawing moss hell yea#I also at some point sat in Pyu's art stream and said I enjoy drawing legs As I was being murdered by the infamously impossibe (imo) squat.#it's ok I had fun !! but I need to learn how to let doodles be doodles or I'll never finish stuff at this rate dfsuhfd#if everything in my tloz tag looks like it was drawn by different people uuuh 2023 was art crisis year ngl......#I'm falling back into my old ways rn though#anyway I think about these two a lot I think they're both stone faced and awkward ppl in different ways but they try rly hard to be friends#like I like to think it starts out so incredibly awkward and a bit sad bc they keep stepping over each other's toes accidentally the harder#they try but idk they find comfy middle ground idk in my brain they have a very interesting friendship I wanna get around to drawing it#in a proper way that might make sense....#if I don't write 200 tags I will die maybe it's bc I grew up on dA or smth#and yes I know how to find 1 (one) type of mushroom /I/ am not mushroom girl unfortunately smh
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Caitvi Scenes: 30/? ↳ "You've got a good heart. Don't ever lose it. No matter how the world tries to break you. Protect the family."
#arcane#arcaneedit#wlwedit#caitvi#piltover's finest#arcane league of legends#league of legends arcane#vi#vi arcane#arcane vi#caitlyn#caitlyn kiramman#caitlyn arcane#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn x vi#vi x caitlyn#league of legends#media: arcane#type: gif#s1 ep6#this set was so long and it took way too long to do ksksfkskf dark gifs...... so hard to color + edit#i almost gave up but since i spent too much time making this im gonna post it lmao
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finished the sunburnt sephiroth doodles months later
#if I get sunburnt so does he.#Genesis is talking about like how his loveless play didn’t go as planned but I didn’t want to type all that so I just copy pasted the#the bee movie script and put it there ❤️❤️❤️#I think if sephiroth spent one boss fight in the sun for too long he would get burnt BADLY and that’s how he gets defeated they’re like wh#Why are you Red and he looks down goes NOOOOOOOO and the little defeated sephiroth thingy pops up#timmy draws stuff#fanart#digital art#my art#ff7#ffvii#sephiroth#genesis rhapsodos#I need to actually draw genesis fr I always draw him angry next to sephiroth 😭#I need to draw angeal too#also what do you all think about the non-binary ball 🔥
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FINALLY MADE A HEIGHT COMPARISON CHART FOR THE VILLAINS (& gene's squad).... it's been a long time since I've drawn most of them in color so I made some adjustments here and there (archie is still the gen 3/rainbow rocket version)
they weren't originally going to all be wearing the least amount that they'd be comfortable with but. I started looking at a bunch of references and had a ton of fun drawing some different body types,,,,
#oceandi arts#height reference chart#generic protagonist#champion protagonist#guzma#plumeria#lysandre#lusamine#archie#maxie#cyrus#giovanni#ghetsis#SORRY FOR THE TAGS AUHGH I JUST NEED TO BE ABLE TO FIND THESE#NOTE: the body types listed with them are just based on what I looked up for references --#ik most body types can do most sports but. general trends sometimes emerge#ignore lysandre's harlotous shirt. I spent a long time drawing his torso and didn't want to just cover the whole thing FKJHDSFKSHD#also side note guz IS trans but he didn't need top surgery. so no scars there. he got on T early enough to skip that bit
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hilarious that with each new day that passes a new bit of dirt from JD Vance's past gets discovered and plastered over the internet...it's almost as if this is why presidential campaigns have always announced their running mates well before the convention...so that if glaring issues with a candidate came to light quickly there would be time to replace them on the ticket before they were officially locked in...it's almost as if certain things in political campaigns were done for a reason, donald...because the very same critical failures had happened before...but no i'm sure you and your guys attempt to recreate a fantasy version of history while ignoring all the reasons that history was a disaster will work this time...because you are built different and the 10000th time trying fascism will work like a charm...
#us politics#politics tw#i view the MAGA movement like this:#the conservatives have been desperately trying to jam a square peg into a round hole for a very long time#and they keep trying because one of these times its GOT to work! a very long time ago they heard the hole was more squarelike#so if they just TRY hard enough it will work!#failing to understand that the hole has become weathered and changed over time and the solution they are trying#will never work (if it ever did)#and then donald trump comes along and looks at the square peg#lobs one of the corners off and proclaims 'this is a triangle! THIS will work! I am so smart!'#and everyone around him is like 'whoa! this guy gets it! he's a genius and understands the problem! he's our savior!'#ignoring the fact that the peg is not a fucking triangle. it's just a deformed square now#so its still not going to work. and even if it WAS a triangle it still wouldn't work because THE HOLE IS ROUND.#it's the same damn peg but it looks a little different so everyone thinks its a genius solution that is DEFINITELY going to work#so they're all excited! they're FINALLY going to prove those idiots trying different types of oval pegs wrong!#they were right all along and it just took donald trump to see it! thank goodness he came along!#but that's just it-- he WAS just COMING ALONG. he was just walking by and saw an opportunity. he never spent time trying to make pegs#all he did was saw a crowd and took a chance to break an already failing peg even further#but because the people were desperate and it was different enough it seemed revolutionary#and now some of the conservatives--who can still see that the 'triangle' peg isnt a triangle are starting to look around#and see that elsewhere there have been some who have forced a triangle into the center of the round hole#and these people think well what if we ACTUALLY tried a real triangle?#and it does not matter to them in the slightest that it will never be the true solution to filling the hole#they just want credit for solving the problem#and so they are going to back donald trump and when the time is right put a real triangle in his hand#while the people trying ovals are busy arguing over the right type of oval#and once the triangle has been jammed into that hole...well...#it is going to be really really hard to force out#anyway thats a long and complicated metaphor and i probably should have just put it in its own post aaaaaahgh#long story short dont be a fascist triangle alright
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a … a gift from the talented @kruinka 🥹 thank you so much!! ദ്ദി ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ)
#彡 moevie!#彡 cherishing.#kruin …. !! you sent this a few days ago but i am still . reeling in . /pos because i cannot believe i am seeing moze ( and myself ?! ) in#your !!!! style !!! your !! adorable !!! and beautiful !! style !!! and there is a lot i have to say — i am in the chattiest mood despite my#sleepiness !! FIRST omg ): thank you ?! thank you !! THANK YOU !!! for being so kind to me and drawing out a sketch that i will treasure for#eternity really 😭 !! i will gaze at this whenever i wake up … gaze at it before i sleep …. gaze at it when im sad … when im happy ( to#amplify the happiness of course !! ) OOOOH KRUIN. kruin . words can absolutely NOT describe how much i love your style … i just cannot ?!#figure out how to put it in words ?? i can’t just say ‘i like how you do this’ ‘and this’ because it’s the literal entire thing that i love#aiwnendjdkke and ): before i get too deep into that — i must thank you another time kruin !! because i know you’ve been busy — and of#course you must be ?! im sure life becomes much more hectic during the holidays and new years like this — so i’m just so soft over the fact#that you spent time to do this for me and i :’) i really appreciate it from the bottom of my heart — i would like to say ‘you really didn’t#have to!!’ BECAUSE YOU DIDNT !!! YIU DIDNT NEED TO DO ANYTHING FOR ME — YOU DIDNT ): IM JUST SO SAPPY AND MUSHY THAT YOU CHOSE TO AND ):#and the background being pink . i love pink !!! i know exactly where this specific shade of pink will prosper ( give me a second .. when i#awake ) .. BUT OH )): thank you so much kruin … it means so much to me .. more than i could ever try to explain !!! BUT IS IT OKAY IF I TALK#ABOUT HOW YOU DREW MOZE BECAUSE . i’m dead on the floor -> x0x this is me because you made his cheeks SO squishy HIS SIGNATURE SQUISHABLE#LOOK . I WONDER HOW ARTISTS MAKE HIM LOOK SO SQUISHY ?? the squish technique ?? BECAUSE HE LOOKS SO CUTE SHJEJD ): KRUIN YOURE SUCH AN AWESO#ME ARTIST . SO TO BE ABLE TO SEE HIM IN YOUR STYLE ….. *thanks everyone for allowing me to have eyes* a wonderful day !! to have eyes !!! i#will actually risk disintegrating into evieparticles if i even so much as mention the blush on his cheeks so — instead . YOU GAVE HIM SUCH A#oh no . the look on his face T T kruin i don’t want to talk about it !!!!! but you — the look on his face !!!! must you draw him in such a#cute manner /pos i am starting to feel speechless trying to talk about how pretty he is in your style because . perhaps toopretty for me#to even make any type of comment ( instead — i sneak a glance and then turn away because if i stare too long …. IF I STARE TOO LONG .. *expl#explodes* ) kruin i think i will just cry seeing the level of detail you put into this ): like my hair ): i think i will just kneel in front#of you and cry and apologize over and over as i wipe my tears on my sleeve because my tears make it difficult to properly thank you /lh#the fact that there are sparkles T T the world is full of sparkles when mr shadow exists !!! a lovely . YOU KNOW WHAT . the sparkles are#there because KRUIN EXISTS . I LOVE YOU KRUIN. I LOVE YOU SOO MUCH ))): I DONT RVEN KNOW HOW TO DTART EXPRESSING MY GRATUTUDE#tldr - i am gobsmacked & staring at this for the next ( infinite amount of time ) thank you kruin !!! ): wishing you only the best .#aggressively wishing you only the best * aggressively turning to go O_O at anything that dares threaten a lovely day for you!!!!
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oh since im posting things again i watched a vid abt this dude recently and nostalgia kicked in
#creepypasta#jeff the killer#liu woods#jeffrey woods#homocidal liu#finding out the most well-known version of their story was plagiarism was like not surprising but god did it make me laugh#like the version of him we all deem as canon or like THE guy is like. someones oc version of him#it makes me feel less bad about the fact that i also have my own version of him. for fun#he doesnt even kill ppl in my ver hes just some dude with issues that i have spent so long rotating in my head#i was laughjng typing out the tags bc i honestly forget their origins sometimes
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Back then space seemed endless. Now it's empty.
a sort of companion piece to my anya one; i just think they share more parallels than people realize
#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#my art#this isnt a defense of curlys inaction im media literate but like#i feel like certain folks paint him as just Male Enabler without giving thought to like...why? idk if im making sense but work w me here#it was just so clear to me while playing the game that jimmy had been abusing curly long before the crash yk#maybe not in the same way as anya but. look at him.#jimmy to me is the exact type to use abuse to create enablers#also people act like curly was blind to jimmys Jimmyness and thought that he was a good man but thats not the read i personally got#points to his first questions to anya when she tells him she told jimmy being “was he angry” and “what did he do”#also the rapid frantic heartbeat as he goes to confront him#thats not the reaction of a guy whos not scared of his friend#idk i could go on but the tags are getting long sdrfegsg#safe to say as someone who spent most of my childhood with a 'friend' like jimmy i have Thoughts about curly
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Do I look like him?
#my god this took me so long to draw and edit together#according to procreate I spent 21 hours drawing#and I think I spent around 3-4 hours in alight motion editing it together#first time editing btw!#gonna reblog this post with all the art and some info about each character soon#by soon I mean I’m gonna start typing right after I post this#rainbow steve#favremysabre#steve saga#rainbow quest#sins of the forefathers#my art#edit#headcanons#sotf steve saga au#SOTF scientists
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My summary/breakdown of Staroba's dynamic (in reference to this post).
Note that I'm going to be working off memory for most of this so if someone has some additional input they wanna chime in with, feel free to. This is also going to be a train of thought/rambley sorta post so it's gonna be a bit disorderly (though, when have I ever been orderly with my posts :p)...
I like Staroba. A lot. And it's such a shame that there are people out there who look at this ship and just see "they're both bisexual, she's girlboss, he's malewife, and she pegs him" because there's SO MUCH more to their dynamic/that isn't even what their dynamic is.
They're childhood friends. We don't know how far back their friendship extends but I'm willing to venture that it's been since elementary school/early middle school at the absolute latest. And at the point in canon when Clover meets them, they're both likely in their late-twenties to mid-thirties in age. That's a long time to know someone, enough to be there through all the cringey, messy phases in life. These two know each other better than anyone else through sheer proximity and time spent together (more on this later).
Starlo has also been nursing a massive crush on Ceroba since they were kids. You can see this in the picture that's in Starlo's house: she's holding him and doing a peace sign at the camera, meanwhile Starlo is clearly flustered and hover-handing her (this was likely back when the Dunes were still the Meadows, judging by what appears to be a pine tree in the background).
That might have you think: "Ah, Rusty, you're so lame. This is a 'the guy gets the girl' scenario. I'm gonna chuck tomatoes at you!" And to that I say: hold your tomatoes! Ceroba did have some interest in Starlo as well! Exclusively in the Pacifist Run, if Clover TALKs to Ceroba two times in the reception area in the Steamworks (immediately after entering the door where the path through the Steamworks branches off from the Neutral/No Mercy Route), Ceroba will initially start off talking about how she met Chujin and how she'll never find someone as wonderful as him in her life, which prompts Clover to mention Starlo. Ceroba gets a bit flustered but states that she did consider getting into a romantic relationship with him once upon a time but he wasn't ready to grow up like she was (8:18 in this video). So there was mutual potential for them to get together when they were younger, but the things they wanted out of life at that point weren't compatible with each other. Like two ships in the night, they passed each other by.
Ceroba fell in love with Chujin, who was ready to have a family and settle down and be mature, which is what Ceroba wanted from a romantic relationship. And when Ceroba got engaged to Chujin, what did Starlo do? Did he get jealous and throw a fit? Shovel-talk Chujin? Try to convince Ceroba to take him instead? Nope. According to Crestina, he got so depressed that he locked himself in his room for days. As hurt as he was by the person he loved not picking him, he didn't make his feelings Ceroba's problem. Starlo was the one who lacked the initiative to ask her out and I get the sense that he knew that deep down; he couldn't just expect Ceroba to magically know his feelings for her and then they get married and ride off into the sunset together. Instead, he respects Ceroba's relationship. They remain good friends. He lets Ceroba and Kanako, the child that the love of his life had with Chujin, come over to his town and goof off. He may not like Chujin as a person because of his own petty feelings but he also respects for the man (seen in his dialogue about Chujin after defeating Ceroba in True Pacifist) and he's aware that his gripes with Chujin are personal.
Then Chujin passes away and Kanako falls down and gets sent to the Lab. While Chujin's death is well-known, nobody else in town seems to know what happened to Kanako besides Starlo (though, without the specifics) and the Feisty Four (who Starlo likely broke the news to). Starlo is Ceroba's sole confidant. With Chujin permanently out of the picture, this could be Starlo's chance to try to charm Ceroba. But he's respectful enough to know that she's in this deeply vulnerable state and so he does the right thing and helps her. Approaches the situation as her best friend. Let her crash in the Feisty Five's shack rent-free because staying at home is too painful for her. Invents his whole "North Star" persona to try to entertain her and distract her from her pain because that's what strikes him as the best thing to do. Pulls Ceroba into his shenanigans to take her mind off her problems. It doesn't exactly work because her problems run deeper than that but an attempt is made to make things easier for her.
On Ceroba's side of things, she may not understand Starlo's whole cowboy LARPing deal but she knows that it makes him happy. She doesn't look down on it or belittle him for having a passion that is so nerdy that it practically pastes a "Kick me" sign on his back. She may not want to be involved in the Feisty Five, but she's entertained by them and lets herself get dragged into their roleplays from time to time (see Ceroba getting involved in the Trolley Problem Mission, wooden actor that she is). In a Neutral Run, if Starlo is spared, Ceroba will throw a party for him to celebrate him reuniting with the rest of the Feisty Five because she wants him to be happy. Despite how different they are in terms of stuff like personality and interests, they both like and respect each other a lot.
They also have so many parallels despite their differences and know each other so well. Clover shows up and Starlo falls too deeply into the persona he invented and becomes a reckless, selfish jerk. He drives away his friends, he nearly kills Clover and there is nothing that Clover can do to snap him out of it (yes, Clover can Surrender in the end, but that only makes him hesitate. And if Clover does anything but Surrender or FIGHT him on the final turn, Starlo will nearly pull the trigger on Clover until Ceroba interferes). Ceroba is the one to call him out on his behavior and make him remember his conscience: he's not this selfish jerk he built himself up to be, he's not a killer. In the Pacifist Run, Starlo goes after Ceroba once he realizes the truth of why she's accompanying Clover to Hotland. It's not solely to protect Clover, though that's a massive factor (if this was the case, he'd accompany Clover back to the Wild East instead of going after Ceroba); he wants to protect Ceroba's heart: she's not the sort to murder an innocent child, she's not a killer. You can especially see this mindset that Starlo has when he calls Clover out in the Flawed Pacifist ending: while the law and everyone else may see Clover killing Ceroba as the equivalent of putting a dangerous murderer down, to him, they killed a desperate mother pushed to an extreme. Unforgivable in his eyes.
There's also how Clover can only say the same responses to killing either Starlo or Ceroba ("..." or "I'm sorry."), depending on the run. As well as how only Starlo or Ceroba can be fought in Flowey's mindscape in a Neutral Run, depending on how the Neutral Run is done. Never both. Could mean nothing, but I like pointing it out.
They're also pretty damn patient with each other despite being impatient people overall. You can see Starlo's impatience with how eager he is to push Clover into being a deputy and how dismissive he acts about the rest of the Feisty Five when they bring up complaints/try to get him to slow down. But when Ceroba wallops him then he gets back up in the True Pacifist ending, then it's a "Well, I guess I deserved that :D." Not a lick of anger for being knocked unconscious. Likewise, when Clover was in the Wild East in a Pacifist Run, Ceroba is likely straining at the bit to get Clover to the Royal Laboratory as soon as possible. But she also knows that having a human in the town that Starlo made to imitate the Surface means a lot to him, so she lets him have his fun with them until he's ready to let them go.
Starlo's and Ceroba's dynamic is founded on a deep understanding of who each party is at their core, mutual respect and kindness for one another, and patience. They're best friends with each other but that relationship also has the potential to evolve into a romantic relationship just as much as it can withstand remaining purely platonic. There is no "this one is the boss of the relationship and this one is the one that defers to the other" dynamic in the relationship because both sides are equals who are willing to listen to each other (Ceroba and Chujin's relationship more closely adheres to that dynamic actually, with Ceroba deferring to Chujin because she sees him as this perfect, untouchable character. You can see this with Ceroba hesitating to kill Clover because she genuinely likes the kid but because Chujin asked her to reap an innocent human SOUL for his serum, she goes all-out to accomplish this). They love each other a lot platonically and I can see the opportunity for some romantic attraction to crop up as Ceroba starts to move on from Chujin and Starlo starts being more responsible post-True Pacifist. They would be two people who mutually grow into the best versions of themselves and also love each other.
#this post escaped my drafts so i spent some time typing it up while it was posted. thanks for that tumblr :/#this is just the jist of it. i could talk further but this post is already getting a bit long.#staroba#''but rusty!'' you cry. ''are they both bisexual?''#my answer to that is they can be whatever sexuality you want them to be (though my interpretation of them is some degree of MGA)#''but rusty! the fans need to know: does Ceroba peg Starlo???'' to that i say uh... decide that for yourself. let that be a thought exercis#and when you reach a conclusion please be sure to NOT let me know unless i actually know you. thanks 🙏#uty analysis
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Chef greg delivery just for you. it's a wonder I hadn't bearified him yet, he's my fave greg too 🔪
gays literally only want one thing (to be chopped up and eaten by a depressed man) and it's fucking disgusting
#kabukeo#something to bear in mind#other's art#limbus company#project moon#lcb gregor#r.b. sous chef gregor#namesake#i'm sorry for doing a haha funny joke reply i just like#i spent like ten minutes pacing around my house when i saw this in my inbox i'm not exaggerating#thank you for my life i love him so bad#do i need a gift art tag now i just like. i don't even know what to say#i haven't even made any actual proper posts yet i just made a silly blog i feel like i haven't done anything to earn this#to stop myself from blubbering i'm just going to respond to the tags on your rb#no problem for providing details again i think about this grown ass fucking man too god damn much but it's not a problem.#problems are only problems if you call them a problem. it's not a problem.#thank you for seeing the vision on rhino geg.#since kjh refuses to release him that just means that we can continue to acknowledge this as true and canon and there's nothing he can do#[ignore that he has a cameo in a card in game no he doesn't]#to me rosespanner is like. very much the type of guy that when you're crushing on him you try to talk to him#and then you get him to start talking about stuff he's interested in#and then before long you end up agreeing to watch something you don't care for in the slightest#solely for the purpose of having something in common to talk with him about#meanwhile he doesn't pick up on you trying to flirt with him like at all#anyway i could go on about how badly i need hex nail gregor for both bear reasons and thematic Actual reasons#but i'm pretty sure i'm about to hit the tag limit. so i'll just say thank you again for the cannibal i will treasure him forever and alway#it took me like thirty minutes to type this all out after i sat down to actually do it because i kept getting embarrassed lmao#offerings to beargregor#< gift art tag#that's it. thank you for my life once again. keep fighting the good fight soldier. we'll get this to be common fanon one day. trust.
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@fenglianweek day 6: memories/growing up
the best thing thats ever been mine
#tgcf#xie lian#feng xin#fenglian#fenglianweek24#my art#full color#I SPENT SOOO LONG ON THIS ONE... like not long for me. fast for me! but compared to the other ones ive done for flw. long.#this has been a few weeks of work and im very happy with how it turned out! tried to be thoughtful about how i approached the colors#and i think it really paid off! theres SO MANY COLORS in the pants im so proud of all the fabric in this...#that white fabric has so. many colors. it makes me super happy#also some of the fallen petals make hearts. btw >:o)#idk if they translate well but feng xin has top surgery scars!!! theyre both trans but xie lian is a cultivator so. he just uses magic#i KNOW when he first learned transformation magic he like BOOKED IT to feng xin to show him like 'LOOK. FLAT!!!'#and little teenxin was like 'ummm 😳 yeah. flat'#ANYWAY!!! idk if they actually look like teens here... hopefully yes. xie lian does to me at least???#or at least he looks different from how i draw him as an 800smthng year old lol. but still like himself i think!!! i hope...#whatever. point is. do you remember we were sitting there by the water. you put your arm around me for the first time. you made a rebel of#the tags cut me off there. thats a good thing. IF YOU KNOW. YOU KNOW.#did you guys know i have headcanons about the type of tswift fans mu qing and xie lian would be. well now you know. I Have Thoughts#OKAY THATS ENOUGH TAGS I NEED TO ACTUALLY POST THIS. ILY MUAH TTYL
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I'm having withdrawal symptoms from waiting for the new episode to come out, and this has been buzzing around my head since this part came out (also I wanna talk about my wife Lily)
Relistening to this part twice made me cry I'm not even gonna lie but weirdly enough it made me think of the end of season 1 where John gets a taste of being the king for a split second but then chooses to go back to Arthur. After he returns, he says:
"But it was in that time in the hospital, that month alone. Trapped in this body without you, when something changed"
"I found meaning. I found that the challenges of life within the boundaries of death were not only acceptable, but could be meaningful. That without a purpose I could forge my own. Is that humanity?"
Don't get me wrong, I don't think it was Lily who was fully responsible for giving John humanity - if anything, that's the mistake Arthur makes in season 3 when comparing John to Yellow (which John calls him out for). It was Arthur who laid out the pieces, and Lily was basically the one to make it click.
Buttt I think reducing John's reason for humanity to only one thing is almost a disservice- because developing a sense of self is so much more complex than that.
It was Arthur's love, it was the stories and thoughts he would share with John, it was being in awe of seeing trees and nature again after so long of living in the dark, it was hearing music, it was listening to the radio, it was the joy he felt after they complished something and he was finally able to feel something other than fear, it was seeing the wraith help them, it was holding a cute baby and picturing her future as a pianist, it was seeing her mother and recognising that she had just lost something priceless, it was having to hold onto hope that anyone is capable of redemption, it was defending and having empathy for the widow despite what Arthur had said.
The last moment is paralleled in season 3 with their conversation about Yellow. Listening to all these makes me realise just how much Yellow missed out on.
Arthur no doubt played a massive role in helping John find humanity and meaning, but honesty? I don't know if purely being with Arthur is what made John who he is. John himself has a conscious and had to make decisions on his own and, on multiple occasions, fights Arthur about ideology with basically little to no outside influence (e.g, their infamous first divorce).
Despite all that though, I still do think Arthur was one of the biggest reasons, I mean just look at Yellow 😭 I'll write an entire essay about him one day
But this entire yap session was basically me trying to imagine what exactly was so special about that month at the hospital because let's be real if I were John I would go crazy BUT sometimes i just imagine John being there, in a hospital without Arthur, being able to do nothing but think
He thinks about the bright clear blue sky he saw, a bird that landed on the windowsill when they were at the library, he thinks about how alive this world is compared to where he came from, he thinks about the radio that's playing, he thinks about the piano, and then he thinks about Arthur
And I imagine he looks at Lily, at her tending to them, at her chatting to them, at her turning on the radio for them so they're not bored and even though people would call all these extra bits of care pointless - she does it anyway, and she does it for them, and John is there to witness this, and that's the moment where it clicks.
I imagine it sort of being like being moved back to see a finished puzzle and finally understanding what you've been making this entire time after spending so long up close looking at individual pieces
And I think that's what the witch didn't understand about John's story. Lily's care was the climax of John becoming John, and even though John acknowledges that for her it was probably another Tuesday - it still doesn't dampen the fondness and love he has for her, he just loves for the sake of it
#lily propaganda#i think about her daily#sappy john propaganda#i think if John got his own body he'd be the type to think about how much he loves every little thing#that man loves everything#i that this also shows through his descriptions to Arthur#they're just so *explodes*#you can tell how much he genuinely just loves looking at things#which is understandable he spent agesssss in the dark world#it reminds of that one potato comic where Oscar asks John who he would pray to and John says 'humanity'#i got so emotional#malevolent podcast#malevolent#lily malevolent#john doe malevolent#malevolent john doe#i could also get into John explaining how Arthur's story to Percival reminded him of Lily but this post is already so long 😭
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darkraiiiiii
#art#i was brewing up a complicated picture in my head too many factors intermingling and i put a requirement on myself that i would need to#feel a certain mood to create said picture cuz only then would it feel good and true but it was an impossible to achieve mood#and it made me miserable for a week i went to bed as soon as possible everyday to skip to the next one but today i woke up at 2am#and thought well maybe i should just draw something simple that i like it doesnt have to be high concept#so its just darkrai!!!! cuz its such a cooly! and its made out of shapes ive enjoyed drawing recently#smoking fire plumelike stuff u kno...#and i got to try out the spraypaint thing again cuz there was stuff i realized i coulda done better after the red 3 head hybrid pic#so i wanted to do it again. do u like these- with the spraypaint rendering? i will make more of them no matter what u say#but im about to go to bed now. i started the pic at 11am and finished at 8pm so 9hrs spent?! well the stenciling takes a long while in pain#i did the spraying in ms paint again and then composited it in paint net like usually.#also im typing much because the combination of coffee (which i try to make special and rare for me so it hits more cutely)#+ the euphoria that drawing gives me makes me talkative. but now.- ! im tired !! goodnight#pokemon#darkrai
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