#i should not be expected to worry abt you
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wildevenusian · 1 month ago
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i just don’t understand. why say ur ready to talk if you aren’t?
can u believe this post is what got me to reach tag limit
#vaugepostimg on main about an irl don’t mind me#i just. am feeling sad bcus i have been trying to keep my distance and respect the space they said they needed. and then they reached out to#me for their book club and said we should chat and i got excited! i miss my friend of course i got excited#still let them take the lead. i want them to be comfortable. they said they’d lmk what day they were free#and then proceeded to ghost me for like. almost two weeks??#(​it was 10 days but !!! still!!! almost 2 weeks from them suggesting i come to book club which would’ve inherently necessitated an irl talk#and then after all that yesterday said they actually weren’t ready which. hurted#tbf i knew something was up after like 2 days of them not replying so it’s not like i was fully caught off guard it just really hurt#and like i feel weird bcus our social circles are really overlapped and i spent a lot of time with them last winter and i had thought#that would happen again this winter. we would swim together a lot and i consistently went to their house dinners#bcus if i care about you i show up! and i’m understanding ! bcus i am patient and kind person and as a triple taurus i’m not tryna rush ever#especially when it comes to people’s emotions ??? especially if someone has told me i hurt them???? like ik im an autistic lesbian but#despite popular conceptions on that particular identity. im not fucking evil ????? if you ask for space i will give you space !!!!!#and like when it comes to emotions and conflict i’m blunt but i’m caring and it takes a lot for me to be disinfranchised by people#or relationships. so i’m not saying i don’t want to still be her friend#i’m just. noticing behaviors#they did tell me that they were very avoidant in conflict and i told them i’m very much not and like. now that i’m on the receiving end of i#idk what to do!! i’m not gonna chase her down like they’re grown!! and again!!! if you ask for space i’m going to respect that!!!#and like honestly. i’m happy she at least gave me the curtesy of saying they weren’t ready to talk even if it took her mad long to do it#so like. who tf knows when we’ll talk. if ever. probably when she wants the validation of our friendship if it even happens at all#bcus again. she reached out not to reconnect and clear the air but to check if i still wanted to come to her club she was starting#ik in earlier conversations she was worried no one would come but ig she found people. which like good for her tbh but to be honest i feel#discarded?? i’m feeling like i’m failing to not project too much so i gotta stop but idk man i’m just feeling weird about it all#and then i had the thought today of like. is this what i want in a friendship? someone who goes back and forth abt whether or not i’m worth#which again. kinda wasn’t expecting that bcus we spent so much time together last autumn/winter/spring like. many times per week!!!#so the idea of not being her friend all of a sudden?? feels fucjing weird to think about#but like? i don’t want to feel this way this is what i hate about west coast/white people conflict resolution!! there fucking isn’t any!!!#and i can’t deal with that! i can’t spend my life with people who aren’t going to engage with me as a person who cares about them#humans are fallible creatures and were only here on earth for so long so why are we wasting time here? what is the point of all this ???????#but then the guilt and shame say i deserve it all and at that point i just need to stop so. i’m gonna stop now lol
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ourfandomcrazyuniverse · 2 months ago
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I have to get this off my chest but I feel like a lot of these “is it okay to do ‘this sexual thing’ in ‘public place’?” polls are getting voted for in the sex isn’t morally evil and don’t judge people way, rather than a respecting other people around you and their boundaries and consent way.
Like some of this stuff is just basic level respect and it’s just kinda common decency to respect other people irl. Sex is fine! It’s not a bad thing at all.
But I feel like if you took away the ‘is this universally a depraved and immoral act’ versus ‘okay in real life would I actually feel a little weirded out by this’ they are very different, and irl you might react completely differently, internally or externally, versus voting no I don’t think this sexual thing is a bad thing to do.
Actually being in that scenario makes things different. Whether it’s the ethical state of the sexual thing made up person/people are doing, or how you actually might react/feel thrown unwillingly straight into the situation.
Not all, but with some of these polls, I feel like we’re forgetting the human pet guy post - on his site. If other people around you aren’t consenting to you doing something sexual in front of them then stop, you don’t need to do it, people aren’t consenting, and you’re making them be part in something sexual without it. Again this bit only applies to some of the posts I’ve seen, not all.
Just had to vent about this personally, it’s fine if you disagree I’m not here to fight lmao. This post is literally just for me. But I feel like a lot of these posts are sometimes misconstruing the moral value of the act versus the usual respect you’d show to people around you when it comes to something sexual, they may not usually be a part of, and may have no warning to beforehand.
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binders-and-beanies · 6 days ago
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Boomer take perhaps but I swear having a favorite season wasn’t always such a politicized and divisive thing, it used to be just a random fact like your favorite color. Why is it this serious deep indication of one’s character now.
It goes in one direction in particular too like,, if somebody says they like cold weather, you typically don’t see everyone in a 50 mile radius clamoring to tell them they must not care about homeless people dying in the cold. Which is understandable given that individuals do not cause cold weather by enjoying it.
So how come if I like warm weather bc of disability reasons and seasonal depression reasons and just plain having a favorite season, everyone and their mother jumps to accuse me of causing and loving climate change. Why is “ah thank goodness it’s warmer today” taken as a declaration of war, whereas “bring back the cold and dark” is allowed to be considered lighthearted.
Like maybe *you* consider your love of winter to be morally and ethically superior but that doesn’t mean I feel the same way about liking summer. Maybe I just like it when my body feels more comfortable and that doesn’t have to mean I think you’re an evil person if your body doesn’t also feel comfortable at the same times as me. I’m not catholic
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solar-halos · 7 months ago
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yall think lucy gray and billy taupe had a custody battle over shamus ?
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izzy-b-hands · 3 months ago
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Didn't think the 1989 version of The Woman In Black would be scarier than the one with Dan Radcliffe in it
I was Wrong flkjdsafkldsja, but I'm delighted to have been wrong. I had missed getting scared with more practical effects/careful timing of things in the background of shots appearing and disappearing, and this one scratches that itch well.
#text post#also fun seeing how differently they interpreted the characters and how they act#personally i'm realising that the Dan version was sort of. Americanised? Which is probably something I should have realised at first watch#but it only hits now when it's like. how to explain#the casts of both versions are both amazing let's preface with that#but. the Dan version felt very Cinematic. I got scared but was also very aware I was watching An Movie during it#(it got colour-graded quite blue which isn't necessarily a bad thing but it does register in my head as Peak Cinematic for the current time#the version of the characters in this 89 version feel slightly more real? accurate to the culture they come from?#like. there's an American Openness between the ones in the Dan version#they're too open to share and hand out compliments and comments like candy they have too much of#everyone is Nice in a way that feels mildly unrealistic#and when they are mad at each other there's tension but a tension#that to me at least you don't worry abt much bc it just feels almost Already Resolved#and it does sort of just drop off and wind up that way tbh#tho I admit it's been a bit since I read the original story so my apologies if I'm misremembering that it did the same in the book#but I could swear there was more that bit of tension there#anyway it isn't that the 89 characters are all mean but they feel Actually British for lack of better words#they have moments of kindness and do have a general sense of like. yeah they care for their community but also they're getting on w/themsel#and their business and not lingering on the interactions#They're kind but not nice and they just. get on with things which is very nice#and feels more in line with the time period to me/what I expect out of a story like this#anyway speaking of Dan found out the guy playing Arthur in this also played the dad in the gross wizard franchise#which wasn't something I expected to see lol#this is my long barely an essay no one asked for and your sign to go watch the 89 version asap#it's on YT for free which is where I'm watching it so genuinely if anyone want link. I have link fjkdlsfjadlsa#I have so many more thoughts comparing and contrasting Dan to 89 but there are so many tags i'm making myself stop lmao
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pallases · 1 year ago
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submitted my first app 😖
#😭 didn’t plan to start this early but they said to do it by tonight and now i am worried abt when other companies want their apps in. i#should have asked them#i don’t think they all want them in now tho bc one of them told me she doesn’t start responding until january which. probably means i can#wait a bit right?? i don’t know 😭#personal#the engineering chronicles#feeling pretty okay abt how today went actually one employer told me i have a very high gpa and that she thought she read it wrong and#another i was talking to abt how even though they’re not a primarily medical company they do do medical stuff and i named and spoke abt the#things they’ve worked on and he seemed impressed by that knowledge. so#really worried tho bc. there are hardly any medical places my school has approved to apply to for this and companies that dont do medical#stuff don’t want biomedical engineering interns even if everything but my electives is the same as an ee’s coursework. bc we’re not going t#stick around for them to hire post grad. like ppl from these companies are straight up telling me not to bother applying or that they don’t#accept apps from ppl in my major etc. which fucking sucks especially since in ADDITION to that the vast vast majority of the companies#that Do have medical stuff going on are mechanical or manufacturing based not electrical. like. what do you expect me to do here#there is one company (the one the guy seemed impressed w me abt) that does electrical and coding stuff and i am really really interested in#them. but as i said the medical stuff is not their main focus and they’re more an all around place. and they also won employer or the year#or whatever a couple years ago. which means Everyone is going to be applying to this company. ugh
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bytebun · 2 years ago
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arolesbianism · 1 year ago
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Mid patch but on the bright side new salmon run specials and on the brighter side kraken specifically I think we've found our new best survivability tool
#rat rambles#splat posting#the new splashdown being in there is also pretty cool and Im especially happy abt it since I actually rly liked splashdown in splat 2 sr#so hopefully thisll be a more reliable version of that + some extra king salmonid dps with the 3 fists instead of one#now ofc this all relies heavily on what the actual damage numbers look like for both specials#but at the very least splashdown should be a decent basket clearer and kraken a decent oh god Im the last one alive button#the main problem with kraken as a survival tool is lack of range with means lack of revival power#but like. its an invinsibility special. so it can only be so bad in a mode where staying alive is part of the win condition#now ideally the charge dash pierces since I can only imagine theyre viewing this as a boss killing special and not a crowd clearer#the one big thing that makes me think itll be a hated rn special at first is that ppl will be to confident with it as a stay alive tool#cause invinsibility is cool and all but the end lag means that those couple seconds will do jack shit if you can't revive someone first#also we have to worry abt nockback too and how certain maps just soooo aren't built for it#like some lowtides itll be borderline unusable due to its nockback I think#unless they reduce the nockback done by salmonids or give it like good contact damage or smth#this is not me saying it'll be bad but I could see this being a special that ppl struggle with figuring out how to use in sr at first#like I think this is a boss killer special that you can also pop in an emergency to survive for long enough to revive someone#unlike most survivability specials in sr kraken'll be a lot more selfish in nature which could be a problem if ppl play too much into that#as in only using it as an escape tool instead of a try to use your guarantee alive time to fix some shit tool#so basically; Im excited for these but Im hard expecting ppl to complain abt it at first once the initial cool factor wears off#also for ppl to act like this makes slider obsolete in sr as it rly doesnt#reef slider isnt a great special in sr dont get me wrong but its not nearly as bad as ppl act like it is#like look me in the eyes and tell me its the worst sr special youd be lying and we both know it#like look at me. we all know its crab. we all know no one wants to be the guy with crab.#like part of it is just a general skill issue in that its hard to use#but like also crab is just WAY to vulnerable by sr standards and way too immobile and just... doesn't have the power to do a whole lot#like most things crab does inkjet does better and everything inkjet does as far as enemy clearing can be done by booya better#inkjet does have value as a survivability and revival tool tho even if theres better for the revival front#crab's only value is as a good king salmonid special but thats rly abt it#like in every situation you could pull out a crab a different special would do the job better#like reed slider is not your best pick either but at least its not as much of a death sentence as crab most the time
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denwritesandcries · 1 month ago
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Fall(ing for You) – S.C
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Pairing: sam carpenter x soft goth!reader
Summary: Sam is certain that Tara's new quiet friend may turn out to be Ghostface, unfortunately – or not –, that friend is you.
or, it takes the help of tara and a dog for sam to finally come to her senses.
Word count: 6,0k.
Content: scream 6 but without the killing, r's 23, cursing, wingman tara ft. yr dog, jokes abt r being ghostface, fluff, pining, sam falling first AND harder, silly movie references.
Note: hey guys, It's been a while since I've written for scream but I rewatched it recently and finally got some inspiration again! I describe the reader a little more in this but it won't really affect anything if you choose to ignore it.
English is not my first language.
Tara made a new friend.
Sam still isn't sure exactly, but the only plausible explanation for the way Tara has been acting lately is that her sister met someone interesting enough to keep her attention so that she gave everyone a break from her tantrums and reckless behavior since their new start outside of Woodsboro.
Now, that could be a good thing, it had been months since the kids started college and they were all doing relatively well. Mindy had Anika, Chad had Ethan and also there was Quinn, even though she wasn't very close to anyone. Tara should have someone too.
The problem is that Sam has no idea who this person is. Tara just won't tell her.
You see, Sam understands that she might have been a little too protective of her sister and that this made Tara's behavior become defensive towards her. Her new therapist – after she got rid of that quack – is helping her work through that, okay? But curiosity and worry were eating away at her insides. The curfews, the tasers and pepper sprays, and especially the ID checks were all important to keep them safe, dammit! Mindy and Chad had no problem with it, and it was only after all the appropriate measures were in place that Sam could breathe and let these new people be a part of their lives. Not knowing this so-called friend, let alone who they were, was driving her to the brink of a breakdown.
She was trying to give her some space, probing with subtle questions here and there and the most she got was an eye roll and ‘It’s just a sophomore I met at the film club, haven't you said I should try to be part of something that didn’t involve frat parties?’
Well, at least it wasn’t a boyfriend, given the lack of dreamy sighs, giggles into the phone and late-night escapades. That was good. They already had enough problems to deal with and a new relationship so quickly was the same as asking for a ghostface to go for them again and Sam hadn’t been back in Tara’s life long enough to know how to deal with this part of being a big sister yet.
Sam had understood that she wouldn’t meet this mysterious person for a while, at least until her sister’s tantrum had passed, and between two shitty jobs and trying to keep a structured life being responsible for a bunch of teenagers in the big city, she couldn’t find it in herself to insist on the subject any further and get the risk of causing a fight. She thought it would be forgotten.
Now just imagine Sam's surprise when she came home one night after a long, exhausting shift, expecting to eat the leftover pizza she had hidden in the fridge and fall into a deep sleep, only to be knocked over by an noisy and strange dog with a piece of pizza in its mouth as soon as she opened the apartment door. Her pizza.
“Koda!” Someone called. Someone unfamiliar. It wasn’t just the dog, there was a stranger in her house.
Sam’s hand instinctively moves to reach for the taser hidden in her jacket when a pair of black-clad legs show up in her vision. Does Ghostface work with dogs now? She wonders in confusion for a moment, and has given up on the voice changer?
The only thing stopping her from tasing this potential killer in front of her is the pure bewilderment and Tara’s laughter filling the room.
“Oh my god,” the figure bends down, picking up the dog who turns out to be a very excited puppy, the pizza falling from its mouth and onto her shirt, getting it all over her, “I’m so sorry.”
It’s a girl, a face she’s never seen before, looking completely mortified.
“Hey, Sam,” Tara stops beside her, a barely hidden tone of satisfaction in her voice, “This is my friend. I thought you’d like to meet her.”
It's safe to say that Sam didn't like Tara's new friend at all.
“You didn’t think about telling me you were bringing someone?” Sam exclaimed, rubbing her temples wearily, “Especially that Lydia Deetz project right there? I almost shocked her in the middle of the hallway!”
Quinn shifted from where she was leaning against the counter in the small impromptu meeting and didn’t bother to hold back her laugh, “Nah, I think Tara would fit that role better.”
“Quinn,” Sam groaned exasperatedly.
“If I had told you you would have said no,” Tara shrugged.
“Yes! Because we don’t know her!”
It was quite awkward sitting on the couch in their living room less than five feet away from the kitchen and being able to hear every word spoken as if you weren't right there, with your messy dog ​​happily chewing on the sock on your ankle.
This wasn't the turn you expected your night to take when you decided to accept Tara's sudden invitation for a movie night, visiting her off-campus for the first time since you became friends.
You met her at the start of the school year, the day she showed up for a film club meeting before anyone else arrived, well, anyone except you. She seemed completely lost and suspicious, even though she was clearly struggling not to show it, which made you like her right away.
Getting attention and starting conversations was never really your thing, this whole club thing wasn't either, honestly, but you ended up being one of the last older members to join with most of the others having recently graduated and the responsibility of looking after the new freshmans gradually fell on you. Most of the time you kept to yourself, preferring the behind-the-scenes side of things to participating in the long-winded debates of high school teens obsessed with slashers and making Stab parodies, but you noticed the way Tara seemed desperate for any sense of normalcy beneath her laid-back facade and the whispers of murder that haunted her.
You took what seemed like a rabid kitten under your wing and ended up cornered by the personification of a Doberman because of it. Talk about doing good deeds and stepping out of your comfort zone. What a joke.
Tara’s older sister, Sam, if you got it right, stared at you with narrowed, suspicious eyes – just like Tara when you first approached her – towering over your figure that tried to look smaller than it actually was on the couch, as if she was trying to learn every little hidden detail about you.
“So…” you began hesitantly, wanting to break the awkward silence that had ensued, “you have such a beautiful house.”
“Aren’t you too old to hangout with a freshmen?" Sam cut in coldly, one eyebrow perfectly arched in distrust.
You sighed, this conversation sure started off very well, “I’m 23,” you cleared your throat, “Tara’s in the same club as me, and I’ve just been helping her with some classes I used to take when I first started here.”
You hear Tara’s distinct chuckle, clearly amused by your frustration, which doesn’t help your situation much. What a wonderful friend, indeed.
Sam hummed with fake indifference and the other two housemates watched the exchange intently, eyes darting between you like they were at a tennis match, amused by the sight of Sam trying to intimidate the poor unsuspecting twit that you were.
A great friend, for sure. Ugh, this is why you don’t sponsor obviously troubled kids.
It’s not like Sam Carpenter is really intimidating or scaring you out the way she seems to want to, she has bags under her eyes and a greasy pizza stain on her shirt and you’re a grown woman, for God’s sake! It’s just that it was extremely embarrassing to cause a scene like that, especially with someone who you really wanted to make a good first impression.
Interacting so much socially lately was becoming relatively exhausting and you expected it wouldn't become a thing, as you were feeling a bit overwhelmed by everything. You hoped this would be the last big meeting you had for a while. Tara had told you a lot about her sister, mainly about how it was a pain in the ass to always have someone hovering over her, but it was something you never took seriously because of the way she sounded when she talked about it, too loving for someone who hated the situation so much. No, Sam was important and Tara had insisted that you meet her after doing the same with the twins just a few days ago. You had carefully planned how it would happen, what clothes you would wear and what you would say and now your chance to make things right was ruined, the words seeming to have escaped you in a flash. You were reserved, quiet, small in the midst of so much hustle and bustle, used to watching everything go by from the safety of the shadows. Being a mouse was easy.
“Is that all you have to say?”
Less easy when caged with a lion.
“Look,” you tried again, silently squirming as your pup start sniffing Sam’s combat boots furiously as you stood to pick him up, “I really didn’t want to cause any trouble or misunderstanding, Tara called me earlier while I was walking this little guy and insisted it would be okay if I came over for a movie. I can leave now if you want to, I’m really sorry for… well, all of this.”
You noticed Sam's expression became conflicted, as if she didn't know exactly what to make of you standing in the middle of her living room without showing any threat and wasn't used to people actually listening to her on sight. Still, she wasn't going to give up that easily.
“Great,” Sam nodded, her voice sounding less firm, “go then.” She pointed directly at your dog, now sitting at her feet with its fluffy head tilted to the side in a guiltily innocent manner, “And make sure to take that pizza thief with you.”
(You swear he looked personally offended.)
“What? No!” Tara seemed to realize that her little game could backfire and came out from behind the counter in your defense.
“Tara—”
“Come on, Sam, it's movie night!” She stomped her foot loudly, “I refused the invite to Jason's party for that, we were marathoning all the Texas Chainsaw Massacres!”
You don’t even have to be good at reading people to know that Sam had lost that fight the moment Tara looked at her with pleading eyes, knowing that there was no way to blame her for simply doing what she asked.
That didn’t stop Sam from rolling her eyes and huffing in irritation.
“Fine,” she practically growled, shifting her attention back to you, “But I’m gonna keep an eye on you, so you better not act all smart and keep that fleabag away from me.”
“His name’s Koda.” You pointed out, before softening, “And thank you, I promise I’m not gonna—”
“Shush.”
Sam was sure this was all part of an act of yours, just the first step to infiltrate their lives and pull the rug out like others have done before, because no one in their right mind would sit quietly next to someone who nearly shocked and threatened them in many ways just a few minutes ago.
Especially if that someone is burning holes in your head with their eyes, like she's doing now.
Sam watches shamelessly and intrigued, shooting daggers at your figure as you lean back with Tara babbling enthusiastically between you, your puppy completely knocked out on her lap, oblivious to the sounds of death and fake blood spurting from the TV. She notices the way you effectively ignore her, responding to Tara’s remarks with genuine interest, even if your voice doesn’t match her enthusiasm.
You remained quiet beyond those moments and the tiredness along with your lack of sudden movements made Sam feel secure enough to leave the room and finally take a shower – because along with everything she never saw much fun in these movies like Tara –, warning you that it was better for everyone to finish the night when the movie ended.
(She also forced Quinn to take her place on the couch and promise to scream if anything happened. You didn't comment on that either.)
Sam only falls asleep when she hears the sounds of goodbyes coming from the living room and the door house being closed, finally relaxing after all the interaction, deciding that it was enough. You could have been at her house, but that doesn't mean she would let you come over again.
You come back, because of course Tara doesn’t give a damn about Sam’s warnings about being careful around strangers – incessantly claiming that you’re not a stranger – and there you are at the next game night that Chad insisted on making a tradition.
At least there’s no sign of the shirt-destroying furball this time and there are pizzas smelling good on the kitchen counter.
“‘Sup, Sam!�� Chad greeted loudly as she walked through the door, waving excitedly from the couch, “We’re playin’ uno!”
Her eyes landed on you, who waved at her with a small, tight smile, awkwardly sandwiched between Anika and Ethan, the way you stood out among them so comical that Sam suppressed a snort. She decided to join in without much protest, someone responsible still had to watch you, after all.
Sam wouldn’t admit to anyone, absolutely anyone, that she was enjoying the evening, listening to the heated exchanges as everyone got competitive. Strangely, she noticed that you didn’t try to engage much in the conversation, just like the other night, seeming happy to just be there. She thought you had been withdrawn then because of her behavior towards you, but maybe you were just shy.
That made her raise an eyebrow, Tara didn’t usually embrace introverts. Actually, she had always been pretty popular even before Sam left, if she remembered correctly, so this was new. She felt a small piece of curiosity spark inside her instead of more mistrust as she expected and it disconcerted her.
“The whole point of the 7 card is that you're not supposed to talk, man!” Mindy throwing chips at Ethan interrupted Sam's flow of thoughts.
“This rule is stupid! The manual doesn't even mention it, read it for yourself!” Ethan shuffled the cards wildly – ​​everyone at the table had seen his hand – pointing, “And you’re talking too!”
“Whatever! Nobody reads the fuckin manual to play uno, Ethan!”
Tara groaned, “Guys, just shut up and everybody buys a card.”
“But that’s not how you play!”
She decided to abandon the game and all the fuss in favor of getting some air and a slice of pizza and was surprised to find that her favorite was still untouched, which was a miracle in such a crowded house.
“Tara said that you liked this flavor,” your voice coming from nearby startled her and Sam saw you gesture to the box in front of her, “My treat, for the other day.”
She cleared her throat hesitantly, “You didn’t have to.”
“I did,” you dismissed with a wider smile, “My dog ​​left you without dinner.”
Sam didn’t respond, but you leaned against the counter next to her anyway, picking at the dark polish on your nails casually, listening to your friends arguing in the background.
“Get tired of the crowd?” Sam asked, deciding that ignoring you wasn’t an option since you clearly weren’t leaving.
“Yeah,” you agreed, shrugging with an odd laugh, “I guess I’ve had enough socializing for one day.”
Sam wasn’t sure why she didn’t just send you away then, seizing the perfect chance to dismiss you like she’d wanted all along and avail everyone's presence to remind that you weren’t welcome, but that strange spark flared in her and made her smile unconsciously, more sincere than the previous tense ones.
“Oh, I know what you mean,” she agreed slowly.
Your expression brightens in surprise, as if you expected a cold, blunt rejection or maybe a slap (probably both) and Sam feels a bit guilty by it. Sighing, she waves you towards the apartment’s tiny balcony, silently inviting you to join her, to which you respond with a firm nod as you watch her unwind the chain on the sliding door – they keep everything locked up tight now – and follow her.
Sam swears she’s not doing this to be nice or anything, all she wants is to repay you for your politeness, that’s all.
The night breeze is refreshing and sends pleasant shivers down your arms and shoulders as Sam leans against the railing and the two of you fall silent. It’s pleasant, actually.
Sam takes a moment to look at you, like, really look at you for the first time since you met and her breath hitches.
Your relaxed features look cheerful and are well-emphasized by the makeup you’re wearing – she tries to search her memory and gets frustrated when she can’t remember if it’s the same style as the night you met – your hair blows a little in the wind and your clothes just fit. Every single thing about you seems to have been specially made to be this way, charming, beautiful.
Your elbow brushes hers in the small space as you lean in to better contemplate the dreary, empty New York sky and Sam’s skin is burning and she doesn’t understand why.
Sam didn’t realize, through all the haze of anger and suspicion and tantrum, until she was touching a pretty girl, that you were, in fact, a pretty girl.
Shit.
“You’re trying so hard not to like her that I’m getting embarrassed for you.”
It’s late. Everyone has already left, including you, who went early claiming you had to work the next morning. Tara should be in bed by now, but she’d be upset if Sam told her to do that, so she doesn’t say anything.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sam dismisses, packing up the last of the leftover pizza to put in the fridge.
“But you do,” Tara hums smugly, stifling a yawn, “Just admit that you were wrong and that I’ve made a friend who’s not a potential serial killer. And that you might have a crush on her. I saw you two on the balcony.”
“It wasn’t like that,” she grumbles, “And I wasn’t wrong for being worried that you brought home a stranger without telling me, even if she’s not dangerous.”
“Ha!” Tara points out, “So you admit she’s no danger.”
Sam sighs tiredly, bringing a hand up to massage her temple, “She can keep coming over for movie nights or whatever if that’s what you're asking me.”
Tara cheered, jumping up from where she was sitting on the counter to finally go to sleep. She stopped just before turning the corner to her room.
“Seriously though,” she caught Sam’s attention, “You guys have more in common then you might think, that’s why I like her. I think you could too, if you get to know her better.”
“That’s impossible, Tar,” Sam says weary, looking at her sister with the most done expression, “I don’t ‘get to know’ anyone, I already have all the people I need in my life.”
“Maybe you’ll be surprised,” she shrugged, “It would be good for you anyway.”
Sam's approval was all Tara needed to make you a regular fixture in their lives and make movie nights an official thing. Sam usually walks in when they're in full swing, with the two of you deep in conversation about the completely random movie you decided to watch that day, and now she greets you back instead of ignoring like she did before and you look happier every time she does it openly.
She finds excuses to wander around the living room and kitchen when she hears Tara pause the tv for whatever reason, just so she doesn't leave you unsupervised in their house – it was still too early to rule out all the care, after all. It ends up making her feel kind of ridiculous, because, hell, she shouldn't have to make excuses to wander around her own house! But you guys talk during these moments, sometimes.
Sam learns more about you as time goes on, and she tells herself that it's just gathering information, that you're not friends at all, but she finds herself soaking up every bit of detail. What are you majoring in, how long have you been in town, if you live close to campus like most students or if you have roommates like them.
(Actually, when she thinks about it now, Sam probably sounded more like a maniac trying to find out where you live, but at least you didn’t call her out on it.)
Then movie nights are joined by study sessions that Tara insists on having as her first week of finals approaches, and you manage to convince Sam to let you bring your puppy too so he won’t be alone for so many hours and she can act a little more normal around you and have a conversation that doesn’t sound like a job interview. You tell her about the movies you like – which consist of more than just an extensive list of slashers like she initially assumed – in a loud and excited tone instead of your usual repressed one, and it stirs something inside her, which leads to several other facts. Your favorite color, what kind of music you like, what you do when her sister isn't dragging you somewhere, and why you decided to adopt a dog so young when you already had so many other responsibilities.
“He helps me not feel alone,” you replied, looking deep into her eyes, “my roommate graduated last year and moved out. I guess I couldn’t stand coming home to empty houses, you know? And he’s my guard dog, he takes care of me and I take care of him. The little guy might be small but knows how to do damage.”
She could relate to that, in part.
And then you start asking too, suddenly and Sam finds herself with a dilemma after so long avoiding your attempts to get to know her. She’d rather remain closed off.
But a trade isn’t a fair trade unless she gives you something back, is it? And you’ve been quenching her thirst for knowledge for a long time now, you gave her a lot.
So, during one night when you insist on helping her make dinner, she confides in you – somewhat reluctantly – that she really enjoys cooking, especially healthier meals. She doesn't look at you, nor does she say it clearly but still, you listen and Sam is surprised when she finds herself speaking.
“You really should ask her out.”
And of course, Tara is always close enough to raise an eyebrow with a knowing look at her on practically every occasion.
“I've told you already, it's not like that.”
“You're cuddling her dog right now.”
“Just so he stays quiet and doesn't disturb you two! Shouldn't you be studying, by the way?”
“Ugh, you’re so annoying.”
Sam can almost, almost admit that you're her friend too.
(Though she kinda wished it were a little more than that.)
Movie nights evolve into sleepovers, because Sam argues that it’s simply too late and dangerous for you to come back alone and she feels embarrassed – and guilty as much – when Quinn brings up that it has always been dangerous and she didn’t mind letting you go before, when she didn’t care about you.
Now there are some of your clothes in a drawer Tara set aside for you just like a colorful food bowl in the living room for your dog – Mindy jokes that it's theirs now – and there’s rarely a day that goes by where she doesn’t see you.
And when you don’t come over, Tara makes sure to remind her of how anxious she looks waiting for a knock on the door and how she lights up when you greet her first when you finally arrive.
“I swear that now she comes here more to see you than me.”
“You’re imagining things.”
“Yeah, sure,” she huffs, “And when are you gonna make a move again?”
“Never, Tara.”
Sam hasn't heard a thing about you in days. Tara said yesterday that you ended up getting really busy with a college project, preparing a presentation that, her sister quotes, 'needs to be perfect because public speaking is horrible and there's a big chance I'll embarrass myself.'
It's not that Sam asked, it's just that she doesn't text you often and Tara thought it would be convenient to talk about it out loud when she was on the phone with Mindy.
Anyway, it doesn't really matter, it's not like you two are close. You are Tara's friend. If it weren't for her, you two wouldn't even have a reason to see each other. There's no reason to be so stressed.
But she misses you anyway. She's having a shitty day at her shitty job and everything seems to go by even slower because Sam knows that when she gets home at night you probably won't be on the couch waiting with the soft smile she's grown accustomed to looking forward and if she has to deal with another group of rude teenagers she'll freak out.
The sound of the bell ringing at the entrance draws Sam’s attention back to the counter and she ends up face to face with the person who has been on her mind all day.
“Sam!” you approached with a tired smile, your dog wagging his tail happily on a leash in one hand and a paper bag in the other, “I was looking for you.”
You'd never visited her at work before, she didn't even know you knew where it was, having only mentioned it in passing, but there you were, with the smile she wanted to see and bags under your eyes.
“Hi,” she cleared her throat, feeling her face heat up. Damn, she looked like a teen girl with a crush, “I didn't expect to see you here, what, uhm, what do you need?”
You snorted at her flustered attending voice. Seeing her show any kind of nervousness was very unusual.
“Tara called me today demanding I get out of the house for a bit and ‘touch some grass’, so I decided to bring this buddy along, he was begging me for a proper walk,” you shrugged, “And she asked me to bring your lunch.”
Sam paused at that, Tara definitely didn't make lunches for her, much less go to the trouble of delivering them like that.
“...Thank you,” she accepted the paper bag you held out delicately, eyeing the package suspiciously. You held back a giggle when she looked at you again, “Anything else?”
“Oh, um,” you shifted your weight from one foot to the other, obviously nervous, “I’m taking Koda to the park nearby and I thought maybe you’d like to come with us. If you can, of course.”
Sam couldn’t really, it was still a few hours before her shift ended at the coffee shop, but she didn’t want you to leave without the promise of seeing you again.
“Of course,” she found herself replying instead, “I can meet you there in a few minutes.”
She knew she’d made the right decision when you gifted her with one of your warm smiles.
“Okay! Nice,” you nod, absently twirling your dog’s leash around your fingers, startled by the sudden, loud bark he lets out at the delay, breaking the oblivious bubble you were in, “Alright, I should go before he starts trying to jump over the counter.”
Sam barely hears the sound of the bell announcing your departure over how loudly her heart pounds in her ears.
It takes a lot of willpower and her last pack of good cigarettes to convince her insufferable coworker — who’d watched the whole thing with a bored expression and loudly chewing gum while cleaning the coffee machine — to cover the rest of her shift. He ended up ordering her lunch too, thinking it might be something special, only to complain when he was met with a sad peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a carton of warm apple juice. Tara really didn’t cook… but then why had she done that?
(She laughed at him anyway.)
“You owe me, Carpenter,” he grumbled, taping a note to her arm that had fallen out of the package.
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.”
Sam was out the door before he could change his mind.
Taking a deep breath of the damp autumn air, she picked up the yellow post-it note curiously, recognizing her sister’s handwriting immediately.
‘u looked so depressed lately that I
decided to send u a gift
DO something this time
good luck!!’
She knew. She fucking knew that smartass had set her up. Sam should have guessed it before. Tara would never let her get away with this without doing something with her own hands. At least she hadn’t brought Mindy into the scheme this time.
The park you had mentioned was more like a small square and with the rainy cold weather of the last few days, it was pretty empty. Sam could spot you without difficulty, sitting on one of the few benches watching the scenery and she made her presence known when she got close enough.
“Can he even sit still sometimes?” Sam asked, hands in her bomber jacket pockets, pointing with her chin at the dog playing alone on the grass. You moved a little so she could sit next to you and subtly moved closer when she did.
“It rained last night and he's a big fan of puddles,” you chuckled, “I guess he's just excited, we haven't been out much lately.”
He wasn't the puppy he'd been when Sam had first seen him a few months ago and the sight of him running around the trees chasing flowers and stray twigs was actually quite funny.
“He's so covered in mud that it looks like a bear.”
“Well, his name's Koda,” you pointed out amusedly, “I would have called him Pongo but he always looked more like a small bear than a dalmatian anyway.”
She snorted, “If you say so.”
Sam couldn't remember a time when she felt so relaxed, with the weight of your shoulder resting against hers, enjoying the weather of the early season, the ground covered in orange and yellow leaves framing your surroundings.
She couldn't stop the restlessness she felt inside her chest, watching your profile. Feeling warm inside, but also shivering with a terrible fear of ruining everything. Do something, do something, do something echoing like a mantra in her head.
Sam took a deep breath. She'd faced murderers before, for God's sake! She could be braver than that.
"So..." She coughed, "Tara set this up, you know? The lunch stuff and everything."
You turned your attention to Sam, raising an eyebrow with a confused look.
"She did?" You asked, "Why would she do that?"
It's now or never, Carpenter. Focus.
“She did it so I could see you,” she looked away, “Because I missed you. Because I…” She felt your hand reach for hers and noticed a fallen leaf on your shoulder.
“Because you…?” your voice echoed anxious. She could do this. She's going to do this.
“I—”
A loud howl scared the two of you and you turned to see Koda behind a pile of leaves, pupils dilated and jumping up and down.
“Oh no.”
“What?” She stammered.
“He saw a pigeon.”
You see, Sam is not a pet person. She has only had one guinea pig her entire life and only before her father left and a 6-year-old Tara let it escape from its cage never to be seen again – poor Darwin would always be remembered – she does not know how to handle dogs, much less big, excitable ones like yours.
Yet she grabs the leash from your hands when you finally reach your dog who won't stop barking at a tree and ignores your warnings that he is heavy and strong, Sam, it will end up dragging you away and tries to gently pull him to convince him to let go so you can get out of there. Because she is big and strong and she wants to show you that she can handle a mere happy dog.
He acknowledges her like she wanted and also drags her like you said he would.
This manages to surprise her more than the first stab wound she took, how one minute she’s standing still, telling your silly dog ​​to walk in a confident condescending tone, and the next she’s running at full speed through the trees and puddles of the park, your worried voice ringing behind her, as does your laughter.
“Sam!” you exclaimed from a distance, hands cupped around your mouth and dark red scarf falling from your neck, “You need to stop!”
She does stop, yes, but only after your dog has already circled her and Sam must be a ridiculous sight with a colorful leash wrapped around her legs and a dog panting with its tongue out next to her.
“Oh my god,” you lean in closer, unable to hide the amusement in your voice, “Are you okay?”
Sam huffed, feeling a strand of hair fall across her face: “A little help would be appreciated.”
“Sure,” you laughed, reaching out to carefully untangle it, “Maybe I should call him Pongo after all.”
She rolled her eyes: “Don’t mock me.”
“I’m not mocking you, it’s just cute.”
Sam opened her mouth to retort, only to realize how close you two were, with your hands resting on her shoulders to steady her and your faces just inches apart, your breath tickling her skin. You seemed to realize the same thing, tongue coming out to wet your lips, your gaze fixed on her mouth.
Do something. Do something. Do something.
She finally does something. She kisses you.
It's all a mix of sensations, she feels when you sigh, breathing through your nose in surprise and satisfaction, she feels where your hands tighten on the fabric of her jacket and tastes you, warm lips contrasting with the cold skin of your cheeks, with traces of coffee, lipstick and something else so undeniably you that Sam swears her heart might stop.
You pull apart hesitantly, breathing fast, noses touching, eyes shining, and she feels herself falling, literally. Your dog jumps on your waist, demanding to be petted, and you fall, taking Sam with you.
Landing in a pile of leaves is more uncomfortable than the movies make it out to be, but Sam can’t find it in herself to protest when you’re the one on top of her. She smiles and you laugh out loud. She didn’t mess up.
“You’re covered in leaves,” you say, running your fingers through her hair, “And your face is smeared with black lipstick.”
She scoffs, “I wonder who’s responsible for that.”
“He is,” you point innocently at the dog standing next to you.
Sam rolls her eyes, but cups your face with her cold hands to pull you close again, and the second kiss she gives you is just as magical as the first.
Tara doesn’t expect to find a dog taking up the entire couch for the first time in days when she comes back from Chad’s dorm after sending you off on a fake mission to find her sister. Yet, hours later, there it is, with one of the sneakers she forgot to put away when she got home from class stuck in his mouth and trails of mud and leaves across the room.
“C’mon, man, that’s not a toy!”
She hears a laugh and finds herself face to face with Sam, looking completely filthy despite the sound of the shower running in the hallway and Tara knows Quinn isn’t home yet. Oh.
“So, you finally did something?”
Sam nods solemnly, pointing to the dark kiss etched into her jaw.
“I did.”
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lowkeyremi · 11 months ago
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jjk men and aftercare ft. Gojo, Choso, Nanami, Toji, and Geto.
a/n: I saw something like this awhile ago and forgot to write abt it but here I am now babyyyy. also not proofread bc im tired :P
cw: really suggestive, established relationships, how they are after sex basically :)
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Gojo Satoru
When you two first started hitting third base Gojo was all about himself and about how he felt. When you had cleaned yourself up and prepared for bed that night Satoru finally realized something was wrong.
"What's wrong, babe? I thought you liked it??" He asks, worried about his performance in bed. Your silence prompts him to try and figure out what he had done wrong, and honestly he couldn't even think of anything.
"Pleaseeee tell me. I won't know if you don't say anything." Those invasive thoughts that tell you, "you don't matter to him." start to attack your brain once again. He's way out of your league you start to think.
"Aftercare. You didn't even offer to help me clean up, Satoru." Saying it out loud makes you sound kind of petty in your opinion but it does matter.
"OH. Shit baby I'm so so so so sorry!!!!! I- It's just-" He cuts himself off and tries to reword his sentence, "Well, back then I.. I was sleeping around so my pleasure was the only thing that mattered to me. It's different.. you know? Dating. I'm still working out everything. I won't forget next time I promise."
He'd been telling the truth because from then on he always went all out with aftercare. He would run you a bath with your favorite salts and oils, he'd make you your favorite snacks, he'd even cuddle you afterwards until you fell asleep. (rich boyfriend privileges)
Choso Kamo
He'd been waiting so long to finally sleep with you for the first time so he had done all his research prior to the day. He was looking at your dilated pupils, messy hair, and the cum that sat on your stomach.
"Okay so, according to the article I read, I should run you a hot bath, yeah?" He asks nervously.
A small smile braces your lips. In all honesty you probably should have expected this much from Choso. He wants to make sure everything is perfect.
"You looked up aftercare???" You sit up on the bed and a back cramp decides to hit right then and there. As soon as he hears your groan he sprints the the kitchen, only to return with a heat pad.
"Heat pad for cramps?" He's truly nervous, and eager to please you, the love of his life.
"Thank you, Cho. I'll take you up on that bath."
"Of course, I'll get in with you if that's okay." The smile on your face is enough of an answer.
Nanami Kento
YOU ARE WINNING!!!!
Massages, baths, homemade snacks, you name and he'll do it for you. In his mind it's the least he can do for you, because you treat him so well and give him that pretty pussy he loves so much.
"Right here?" He's currently working those skilled fingers into your tight muscles after bending you every which way.
"Ohhh... yes right there, baby. Hurts so muchhhh." You whine and moan at the same time. At this point you two have already bathed and he's made sure to moisturize your body leaving you clean and refreshed.
He seemed to notice the way you limped and asked if you need anything. The sex was good really, but you didn't want to tell him that folding you in half wasn't the best idea. Oh, but he's persistent would not leave you alone until you told him what was wrong.
Once you told him he had immediately sat you down, picked up your favorite lotion and started to work out the kinks in your body.
"I'm so sorry, again." He mumbles quietly.
"Stop apologizing, Kento. These things happen. At least I know to stretch before hand next time." His face softens at your giggles and he presses a small kiss to your thigh.
"Oh do not get me started." A smile creeps up his face, while blush slowly spreads across yours.
Toji Fushiguro
BOOOOOO no aftercare. well maybe not much at least.
Has not properly cared for a woman since his late wife but he realizes if he wants you to stay he'll have to fix that.
At first he would throw a wet rag at you and give a simple, "here clean up." When he got out the shower he was genuinely confused why you were no longer at his apartment.
As soon as you picked up he could tell you were pissed, "What do you want, Fushiguro."
He's a little shocked, did not expect that from you, "I'm your boyfriend so it's Toji and not Fushiguro. The hell is your problem??"
The silence is so loud. For a second he thought you'd hung up on him. "Hello??"
"I'm giving you some time to think about that dumbass question and figure out why I'm mad at you." He clicks his tongue and rolls his eyes too. He's lucky you can't see it.
"Ugh, I don't have time to play the damn guessing game. You're always mad about the little things.. what is it?" He's running through anything he could have possibly done wrong recently.
"Toji, you threw a fucking wet washcloth at me and told me to clean myself up. I'm your girlfriend, not one of your one night stands!" There it is, and the bad part is he doesn't even see what's wrong with that. (at first)
"I don't even give them something to clean up with, I just leave. But damn if you want me to get all fancy and shit I'll try." He scratches his head and begins to wonder why women are so hard to please.
Let me tell you he's no Nanami, but it's getting better. Still falls asleep afterward most times tho :/
Geto Suguru
You do it yourself for the most part, and here's why.
He's over here washing you up in the tub and he can't stop staring at your soapy titties and it just leads to more sex.
It's never just aftercare with him. He's always chasing more. Like that time you asked him to massage your legs after you two had finished fucking in the tub.
"Yeah shit why not? Lotion or oil??" He asks looking through your products.
"Uhhh lotion's fine." You'd grabbed your phone to see if your mother left you a voicemail which she did. She talked about how you need to pick up the phone or at least text her your alive if you're not gonna pick up. You were NOT going to pick up earlier though. Suguru likes to tease and you learned that the hard way when he was eating you out while you were discussing group bonding dinner ideas with your boss over the phone.
Anyway, he made his way to the bed with your lotion and all things went to hell. It was slow at first, nothing too sensual, then of course he had to slip a finger in your pussy and you sat there and stared.
"We are not doing this, we just got out of the bath." You were so serious, but so was he. (you were also aroused so)
"Another bath never hurt anybody, 'fraid of a little water baby??"
(such an annoying whore)
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orbitsaturn · 2 months ago
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"actually?" "yeah, actually."
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─ in which you accidentally bump (fall) into someone you might know in an indoor climbing gym
"his arms look really meaty..."
modern au! kinich x reader abt 2.1k words!
final part of part 1 this can be read as a standalone!
your user is sparkling toots in this fic
──────────────────────
"I'M DODGING I'M DODGING!!" you yell over the call, hastily pressing multiple keys and moving your mouse quickly. it's been a while since you played with your friend, almightydragonlord, yes, cheesy username. but still, you enjoyed playing with him as he makes everything easier, really, EVERYTHING easier. he helped you with your builds the first time you met him, albeit much to your refusal (felt insulted when his so-called lizard, 'ajaw' called your characters trash) (it was actually ajaw but you refuse to believe how a lizard can somehow spell out the words l o s e r).
anyways!
the only response you can hear from the other side of the call is loud typing, followed by a brief. "mhm" from the almightydragonlord. he's quiet, the only time he really speaks to you is when he's giving you constructive criticism or the rare times he chuckles when you die during boss fights. which you respond by angrily yelling at him.
"toots, behind you." snapping out of your thinking, you quickly dodge the incoming attack hurled behind your character by the boss you both were fighting. with one more quick setup from the almightydragonlord it was instantly over, the huge numbers brought by his characters becoming more and more like a regular sight for you. welp! at least your daily boss fighting is done for the day.
"dragonlord I'm gonna go now! i'll see you later?"
"mhm, see you"
"as curt as ever i see! bye!!"
and with that, you ended the call. pulling off your headphones and doing your daily routine to hang out with one of your friends later in the day.
───
"hi mualani!" you waved enthusiastically to your friend who was at a distance. she also waved back with the signature smile that she boasts.
as you make your way towards her you feel a sense of suspicion by the seemingly mischievous smile on her face.
"guess what we're doing today!"
"what?"
"rock climbing!" mualani says, clapping her hands together eagerly.
"we're going rock climbing?!" you cried, quickly whipping your head to look over at the outfit you wore today, which was clearly not appropriate for some activity. furthermore, you've never rock-climbed before except for that time in elementary in the local playground.
wait.
you did have some experience in rock climbing. maybe you should just rely on your memories from your elementary school days! but that was years ago.. and your outfit might hinder you from movements that are essential for climbing.
"don't worry. i got some extra clothes in the back of my car." mualani winks upon seeing your worried demeanor "also it's indoors! so we won't be climbing on real rocks! haha!" she pats your back reassuringly.
upon hearing that you breath a sigh of relief. "oh thank goodness" you say dramatically clasping your hands together. you knew you'd actually be fried if it really was real rock climbing. after the brief chat you both share you quickly make your way to her car door, quickly sitting down and buckling up before the car starts.
always. remember. to. buckle. up.
was the mantra you always repeated before getting into a car when you were young. nowadays putting on the seatbelt was just muscle memory for you. whenever you get into a car you put on your seatbelt without thinking. a necessary habit honestly.
the ride was short, it only took a few minutes to arrive at the indoor climbing gym. funny enough you saw a car with the plate "drgnlrd" parked near the gym. who the hell names their license plate like that?! it's also the same name as the username your friend online has.
well, it's probably just a coincidence!
as you both head into the gym with no expectations whatsoever you were instantly baffled by the sheer height of the
fake rock climbing thingy?
you don't know what it's called but you do know you'll be able to conquer it. i mean, you weren't called the ruler of the playground for nothing! you were dubbed "sonic" by your peers back in elementary for climbing super fast on the rock climbing part in the local playground near your house.
it's safe to say you might be the best (worst) one in the room!
as you head your way to the changing rooms in the gym you notice a familiar figure high up on the rock.
"his arms look really meaty..."
"what are you looking at? let's go so we can climb sooner!" a voice from behind you quickly snaps you out of your thoughts.
oh my god. why were you even thinking about how some random dude's muscles look tasty?? get a grip!
as the both of you head inside you remember the time when almightydragonlord sent a video of him skydiving. yes skydiving, falling out of a helicopter type of skydiving. the area he was skydiving at looked really familiar too!
wait.
familiar?
as you retrace back to the video he sent you, the feeling of dread forms in the pit of your stomach.
lush green trees, tall hilltops, and the distinctive sight of saurians.
lush green trees...
tall hilltops.
SAURIANS?!
NATIVE TO NATLAN SAURIANS?!
HE LIVES IN NATLAN?!?
BUT YOU LIVE IN NATLAN TOO??
ugh! you even shouldn't be thinking about him when your supposed to be conquering the climbing wall soon!
"ugh.. let's not think about this today..." you grumble, quickly putting on the clothes mualani handed you earlier. as you make your way outside the room mualani is already there waiting for you,
"hi!! ready partner?" she smirks at you, dragging you to the rock wall (which looks even more intimidating close up) that you have to conquer.
gulp.
NO!! you can do this. you weren't called the ruler of the playground for nothing. you can conquer this. maybe think of it as a necessary level to beat! plus you have a harness attached to you right now! so you won't wall to your death if you fall. and! if the harness fails you know who to sue to get money.
with one more final nervous gulp, you start conquering (climbing) the wall. when you look up you already see mualani way ahead of you. oh dear, looks like you have a time limit to this level.
"wait!!" you cried, starting to climb the wall, with ease actually, this was way easier than you thought!
"heh. I might actually be the ruler of the climbing gym now!" as you smirk to yourself you notice some weird white powder on mualani's hands? "mualani, what's that stuff on your hands?" you yell out above, "oh! this is climbing chalk, it helps strengthen the grip of your hands if they usually sweat." she yells back.
sweat
sweat
sweat
you know that feeling when you're suddenly aware of how your hands produce sweat and it sweats right after? yeah, it's sweating right now when you realize your hands have the function to sweat.
"oh uh! that's fun" you reply nervously, the word 'sweat echoing throughout your head, the feeling of your sudoriferous (sweat) glands activating within your hands right now, it isn't mandatory to lather that white stuff when you're climbing, so it should be fine...
right?
yeah no, it's not fine you can feel your hands sweating right now, loosening your grip, BUT,
it's not mandatory to lather that stuff so...
"hellloooo!! up from above! hurry up!" mualani's voice snaps you out of your thoughts once again as you look up in response, "we're almost to the top y'know!" she yells making you realize that you were really high up.
and that makes you sweat even more.
but you prevail! you grab onto the next wall hold, and the next, but the feeling of your grip getting weaker every second was not concerning at all! (lie) but you were almost there! you're about to beat mualani and claim the title of the ruler of the climbing gym!
"watch i'm going to win," you say confidently, but in that moment your grip was already weak, weak enough to make your hand slip.
the last thing you see is mualani's shocked expression, followed by one of relief and confusion..?
...
..
.
a hand quickly snakes around your waist, making sure you don't fall to your inevitable doom.
"you good?"
a familiar voice brushes against your ear, your stomach dropping. a foreign feeling of heat rushing to your face due to embarrassment.
as you look at the person who saved you, you are instantly dumbified.
a beautiful mixture of green and orange meets your eyes, with long, thick, dark lashes that compliment the brightness of his orbs, creating a stark contrast that makes it difficult to look away.
wait.
beautiful amber green eyes with dark fluffy hair.
no way.
is he..?
"almightydragonlord?" you say breathlessly, staring at his face shamelessly.
"oh?" his arm unconsciously tightens around your waist, a look of surprise painting his face with the utterance of his online username. in a few seconds his face begins light up as he realizes your identity, "sparklingtoots?" a subconscious smile making it's way to his features, which in turn causes you to gawk even more at him.
oh dear. that smile is deadly.
"t-thank you?" you say confused, blinded by his smile. gosh, he was cuter in person, instead of falling to your death maybe you'll die by the brightness of that smile instead.
wait.
shouldn't you be falling right now?
you slowly look down at your waist.
a hand.
his hand.
the hand you complimented earlier without realizing it was him.
snaked around your waist to prevent you from falling, the proximity between you two was worse, your left side touching his right, his fingers gripping your waist tightly to secure you onto him, the feeling of his forearm around your stomach firm.
oh archons, he's built too?
"u-um, aren't you tired?! shouldn't you let go?! uh! I have a harness don't worry! and I must be heavy!" you say nervously, the close proximity between you two was not helping your conversational skills whatsoever!
"oh sorry, it was on instinct, I'll let go if you want to" he slowly releases his hold on you, careful to not make you drop unexpectedly.
wait, wait, wait, wait.
you're still really high up! you might actually faint if you start free-falling!
you instantly grab his hand, positioning it back on your waist again. "wait! actually please keep holding on, i think it'll be terrifying once i start swinging down." you look up at him, eyes that basically read, 'please don't drop me or else I might actually pass out.'
"you think i'd drop you without any warnings?" he looks at you confused, his hand keeping a firm grip on you once again to prevent you from falling. "i mean... you're carrying a full-grown person right now, so you might claim that you won't drop me on purpose but i don't know if your hand is gonna agree!" you say worriedly in response.
"don't worry i'm strong." he replies, trying to reassure your worries "do you see my pocket? there's some climbing chalk in it, use your hand to get some."
"uh, which pocket?! the front or back?"
"any."
you hesitantly reach into the front pocket of his pants, grabbing a handful of chalk which you quickly lather all over your hands. "now use one of your hands to grab onto one of the holds closest to you" he instructs, which you quickly follow. as you grab onto a yellow hold and then grab onto another one until you are free from his hold, you realize just how much your grip has improved, that you should've just slathered on some climbing chalk before you started climbing to prevent this whole fiasco from happening...
"thank you! um, almigh-"
"kinich."
"oh! thank you the almighty dragon lord kinich!" you tease. in response, he lets out a brief chuckle that you've always heard on the calls you had together.
"i didn't know you lived in natlan!" you exclaim, slowly making your way down the wall. "i thought you knew?" he replies confused, keeping watch of you to make sure he'll catch you before you fall again. "shhh.. i know you sent me that skydiving video months ago but i just realized until today! also, do you do that stuff often..? i mean... you had no hesitation jumping off the helicopter!" you ask him in curiosity, it's strange! most people would hesitate for a bit before jumping off! but this dude didn't even look worried at all!
"oh yeah, i do a lot of stuff like that, like bungee jumping, mountain climbing, sky di-"
"HUH?!" you look at him in disbelief. is he one of those adrenaline junkies?!
"i know most people are shocked, but I find extreme sports enjoyable." he says, looking at you with a gentle smile.
oh dear, you don't think you'll get used to that smile anytime soon.
as you both make your way down, you learn more about the almightydra- kinich, how his lizard ajaw was really the one who made the nasty comments about your characters (which you still don't believe), and how many extreme sports he does, which was a lot. and mualani also descended down quickly to make sure you were okay! as you near the start of the climbing wall you swear you're gonna kiss the ground once you make it back down.
"oh my archons." you collapse on the floor, heaving a sigh of relief, at least you know now to make sure you have emergency climbing chalk in your pockets... you really should invest in some if you're planning to climb more in the future...
as you are laying down on the strangely comforting gym floor you feel a cold object against your forehead. "are you free after this?" a voice above you says as you look up to see kinich leaning over you, water bottle in hand, pressing it against you. just as you were about to respond you were quickly cut off by another voice above you. "yeah she's free!" mualani chirps above you, giving a thumbs up to kinich which she then looks down to wink at you. "I'll be going now. make sure to tell me everything after," who then looks down to whisper at you, giving you a mischievous grin before walking away.
kinich then drops down beside you, turning his head to face you.
"lunch with me today?" he asks, which in turn you grin, "are you asking out on a date? the almighty dragon lord kinich! asking me out on a date! can you believe it?!" you tease,
"and what if i was?" he responds, his amber-green eyes meeting with yours.
"h-huh? actually?" you say surprised, taken aback by his forwardness. you knew he was curt but you didn't expect it to translate over to real life! "yeah, actually." he stands up, offering his hand to you. you grab his hand as he helps you stand up before facing him.
"also, don't worry, i don't do extreme sports with my car." he flashes you a grin.
──────────────────────
A/N!! OH MY GOSH HELLO EVERYONE. thank u all for the support from part 1, I hope you guys liked this one as much as the previous one!! I tried really hard to not make kinich ooc... (I hope I didn't..) I looked up his lore and stuff and found out he liked doing extreme sports! and the skydiving from the previous one I wrote was pretty unexpected BUT!! akshually (nerd emoji) "As a core member of the Scions of the Canopy tribe, Kinich is fond of extreme sports, and is said by his companion K'uhul Ajaw to have plunged headfirst off a cliff and lived to see it (LIKE!! THATS BASICALLY SKY DIVING!!)" quote the genshin wiki!! anyways I hope you enjoyed reading this.HAVE A GOOD DAY OR NIGHT!!
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amateurasterism · 2 years ago
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hi!! do you take requests? cause i cant stop thinking abt jeonghan being rlly rlly flirty with reader (she never responds to it) but when reader flirts back he gets so shy :( and he tries to pretend not to be but his cheeks get red and he gives that shy cute little laugh yk :(( just pure fluff and maybe reader teasing him abt it until he kisses her :(
ahh i love this concept sm!! shy jeonghan:( tysm for the request!<3
such a flirt !
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synopsis ; it’s simple: jeonghan knows he’s a flirt, but didn’t realize you flirting back was the key to breaking him.
pairing ; yoon jeonghan + gn!reader
notes ; pure fluff. jeonghan is down horrendous bad. not proofread. i need me a flirty jeonghan tbh
word count ; 0.6k
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“My hand is kinda heavy, can you hold it y/n?”
As he asks, Jeonghan is staring at you like you’re the only thing that exists in this world. His pinkie finger brushes every so slightly against yours with the tiniest sliver of hope behind the action.
Not to his surprise, you keep on walking along the park trail, eyes watching the stars in the midnight sky, the only reaction to his question being a sarcastic roll of your eyes and the faintest show of pink painting the tips of your ears. Your hand doesn’t move any nearer to his, continuing to walk in step with Jeonghan but not saying anything to his comment.
Which is normal. Jeonghan expects no reaction further than that pink on your cheeks whenever he flirts—he has been for the past two years. But its okay; just being with you is enough. He likes the look of your smile and the sound of your laugh to his sarcastic jokes too much. A future with someone else walking beside him like you are right now is impossible for him to think about, so he settles for this. And it’s enough. He wouldn’t be selfish.
“Let’s sit down here, I want to look at the stars for a bit,” you venture towards an empty grass field on the side of the trail. Jeonghan places the small blanket you insisted on bringing on the ground for you both to sit on.
“The sky is especially clear tonight,” Jeonghan isn’t sure if your thinking aloud or to him, but he’s happy to listen no matter what. “You can see every star.”
Jeonghan hums in agreement and places his chin on your shoulder, trying to see what stars had caught your eye. You take turns tracing constellations with your fingers on the sky’s pitch black and white freckled map.
“It’s crazy to think that out there with all those stars is an infinite amount of universes,” he says thoughtfully. “And in one of those universes, you could be my girlfriend.”
You look him in the eye. “Or it could be this one.”
Fuck. He was not expecting that.
Jeonghan had no idea six words would come to be the decline of his flirty facade. But the moment they can out of your mouth, the air had increased temperature and he felt just as red as a tomato. He seriously couldn’t recall the last time his entire face had been as red as this. He suddenly was fighting his own hands to not cover his face of its flustered state.
“Are you okay?” You tilt your head, concerned for your best friend’s suddenly quiet aura.
“I’m fine,” he replies in the most normal voice he could muster. “Got kinda hot out here, huh?”
“Not really…?” Realizing what was going on, your worried frown turns into the biggest smile he’d ever seen. “Wait. Yoon Jeonghan? Blushing?”
He lets out a frantic laugh that shakes out of nervousness, somehow turning even more red when you continue staring at him with that smile. “What are you talking about?”
“Aww, was it because of what I said?” An uncontrollable laugh bubbles from your chest and can’t stop. “I’ll admit, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this red, Hannie. It should happen more, it’s cute.”
“Since when were you such a flirt?” He mutters under his breath.
Laughing, you cup his cheeks in your hands. “Since now. I like this.” You drift the tip of your pointer finger over his reddened cheeks in a way that make him wonder: what are we?
“Well, you know what I like more?” Jeonghan gently grabs your wrist and averts you away from his red cheeks.
“What?”
“This,” he says, right before pressing his lips against yours.
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one reblog = one flirty jeonghan
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angelicdanvers · 3 months ago
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BREATHE DEEPER | five.
a charlie bushnell x fem!reader social media fic.
levizmiller
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liked by y/n, dior.n.goodjohn, leahsavajeffries, and others
levizmiller — she won at pool. again.
tagged | y/n
y/n hey at least we got drinks ↳ levizmiller true ↳ walker.scobell YOU CAN DRINK??? ↳ y/n technically yes BUT i settle for virgins
dior.n.goodjohn best duo loading?! ↳ levizmiller YES
user i lowk shipp ↳ user2 nah they prob friends ↳ user3 ay no need to speculate 😭
y/n
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liked by levizmiller, dior.n.goodjohn, walker.scobell, and others
y/n — prep for the jumpscare at the end
tagged | levizmiller
levizmiller 😭
walker.scobell i wanna be your age ↳ y/n in like five years buddy
walker.scobell also levizmiller your physique is ELITE ↳ levizmiller thank you walker :)
leahsavajeffries YOU GUYS ARE SO COOL ↳ y/n that’s our goal >:)
iamcharliebushnell hope ur having fun! ↳ y/n thanks!
dior.n.goodjohn YOURE SO HOT ↳ y/n BABES YOU ALL YOU
user2 not charlie becoming less and less consistent ↳ user4 fr man this is sad
GALILEO’S GALS
forbidden child added cutie patootie
↳ HI ARYAN OKAY SO UH I NEED YALLS HELP i think you guys were right
cutie patootie aw what’s wrong?
chanel’s enemy uh oh
↳ yeaaah so is charlie mad at me??? for hanging out with levi?
lee lee he shouldn’t be, he doesn’t have a reason to because even tho all of us are close it’s still your life yk
chanel’s enemy i second that, and if he does that also means SOMETHING if yk what i mean
dr dre im not even gonna sugarcoat, his comment seems so passive 😭
↳ welp i’ve screwed up big time 😃
cutie patootie i mean he’s okay around walker and i. he did keep talking about you at one point last night when we were watching moon knight literally made us pause the ep and just spoke of you
chanel’s enemy BRO UR GONNA HAVE TO SAY MORE ELSE WE’LL JUST ASSUME HE’S GOT A CRUSH ON HER
cutie patootie idk bro it just seemed to me that he missed her a lot. he kept saying how he wanted to take her to egypt esp a restaurant by the pyramids considering y/n still hasn’t been and other places
chanel’s enemy ong he deffo should if he likes her, he should actually ask her out before anyone else does take her to a nice lil restaurant, get her flowers, whatnot
cutie patootie yeah fr
↳ yall pls tell me youre not speculating he likes me
dr dre omfg Y/N ARE YOU PAYING ATTENTION TO ANY OF THESE DETAILS
↳ yes but im choosing to ignore them for the sake of my sanity
lee lee GIRL HE PROBABLY LIKES YOU IF IT ISNT THAT, THEN ITS BECAUSE WALKER SAID LEVI’S PHYSIQUE WAS GREAT AND HE ONLY EVER USED TO SAY THAT TO CHARLIE
↳ YEAH BUT CHARLIE’S MATURE
dr dre is he tho guys do dumb shit when they like a girl
↳ he doesnt like me 😭
cutie patootie ANYWAYS i'd keep my eyes and ears open if i were you, y/n, you definitely didn’t screw up but if you're worried abt charlie maybe just be a tad bit more careful?
↳ gotcha, no more levi posts then?
chanel’s enemy i mean ofc you can post him, it shouldn't be anyone's business as to who you're posting, but idk it's so hard to explain like don't get me wrong i think you should post whomever you wish but hopefully it won't hurt anyone. i mean you're not with anyone controversial so it shouldn't be a big deal anyways, plus if someone cough charlie cough can't fess up their feelings it's on THEM not YOU
↳ i definitely get that, thank you for the insight you guys :) it’s just tough because i really don’t know how i feel either
chanel’s enemy WAIT WHAT i did NOT expect that response
↳ i can't help it idk my emotions are all over the place right now
chanel’s enemy GIRL YOURE NOT A BOP STOP ACTING LIKE ONE
↳ RIGHT SORRY 💀 K PLEASE HELP THO
cutie patootie okok miss y/n do you, or do you not, have a crush on levi?
↳ i do not
chanel’s enemy okok MISS y/n l/n would you rather be MRS. y/n bushnell?
↳ DIOR WTF MAN
dr dre well THAT got a reaction out of her
↳ ugh but he's cute and he’s so sweet and he’s so charming too he texts me every morning no matter what timezone i’m in and he gave my mom flowers when he first met her too he’s so smart, both emotionally and intellectually like doing math with him is just >>>>
lee lee girl. GIRL.
chanel’s enemy LMFAOOO MATH 💀 she down bad BAD
dr dre you see there’s a river in egypt…
cutie patootie AND YOU STILL THINK THIS IS PLATONIC??
↳ OKAY OKAY fuck i like charlie don’t i
chanel’s enemy OH YOU DO YOU DEFINITELY DO
cutie patootie YOU LITERALLY WORRY ABOUT HOW HE FEELS ABOUT YOU ABOUT THE PEOPLE YOU HANG OUT WITH YOU'RE DOWN BAD N/N
↳ aw shit man WHAT DO I DO
chanel's enemy MAKE A SUBTLE MOVE ASAP
lee lee HANG OUT WITH HIM SOON
dr dre MAKE A SHORT FILM
cutie patootie YES THATS PERFECT
↳ guys this is too hard i dont like this
chanel's enemy STFU YOU WILL DO THIS WE ARE HERE BAE 💪
↳ OKOK LOVE YOU GUYS LEMME TRY THIS OUT
— taglist.
@shokocoded @istillremeberthefirstfallofsnow @surftrips @svtsimp22 @thames-fig @captainshischier @reggieslifeboat @multifandom-loser @wheelerslover @mermaid-mqtel @randomnpc456 @kaithoughs @isab3lita @mariposa555 @sunshinessky @myr-cheri @thedeadlynights @ella33 @c1nn4mng1rl @poppysrin @breadbrobin @lucy-the-ant @jules-loves-lukecastellan @taloulalila @tom-pls-fuck-me @mia-luvs @iknowyoureabigfan @rinisfruity14 @chasebeth @auttumnsayshi @prettygirlformula @alwayswndr @balletfilmss @kestisvrse @1forthemoney2forthekish @eissaaaa @emelia07 @toffytaste @soulaires @bearwon @happy-mushrooms @simrah1012 @blimp-blimp @obxstiles @yuminako @hopexcroc @mackycat11 @knowugetdejavu @0puddleofgender0 @callsignwidow @i-heart-emos @eddiesdrummergf @suckerforblondies @homebyeleven @bookworm-center @kawliflo @https-evan2 @ihrtzku @strawberryapplesauce13 @captainshischier @vbbaby-girl @honeysmoonn @itssmandiee @kinderwh0r3 @willsdills @americanbluebirdrb @bokutos-biddys @ln4author @lqclercs @czennieszn @laveens-pearl @inlovewithcarsthatrunreallyfast @aerangi @taygrls @ilamara @hanjiiberry
hi my loves! i am so so sorry for disappearing for a bit, school was getting horrible during the second semester and i found very little motivation. i rested all of july and i am hoping to update this series, along with posting a luke one i've written for the past few months, throughout this month! i think i've mostly tagged all the people that requested to be a part of the taglist, forgive me if i missed you or tagged you twice.
how are you guys doing?
please stay safe and drink water, i'm proud of you <333
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l3viat8an · 11 months ago
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HI RO!!!! it’s been forever since I’ve been here oh my 😭 how are youuuu???
I’m just having. many a thot thought. abt poly MC getting praised and pampered and overstimmed just getting all the sweet, gentle (soft dom??? I guess??) vibes from the bros after doing really well during the semester/term at RAD.
maybe they tease or double down on praising bc they know it makes MC shy but also that they actually enjoy it 👀 maybe getting tied up is involved 👀
but overall they’re not mean, they just want MC to know they’re proud of them, so what better way to do that than going to the extremes to show them?
anyway that’s my little rant, I just thought it was cute and wanted to share 😋🫶🏻
have a good day, and happy holidayssss!!! make sure you take care of yourself <3
- ♈️ anon
Hiiii ♈️!!! I’m good! Tired from holiday prep but good lolol how have youu been??? + it’s late for me so ignore if this has any typos as usual jsjsj
Just imagine Asmo getting all excited when he sees how well you did! His sweetheart is soooo smart and that deserves some kisses right~ he he’s going to cover your face in quick little kisses, giggling the whole time! It doesn’t matter who else is around, you deserve the praise and the blush on your cheeks is so cute!
Then Satan walks over and basically pushes Asmo out of the way- completely ignoring Asmo’s pouting and saying that if anyone praises you it should be him. after all he’s the one that tutored you all semester and helped when you didn’t know something about Devildom law- his kiss is deep and would’ve been a lot longer if Mammon and Levi weren’t yelling whining about how they helped you too!!! This is all just Asmo and Satan looking for an excuse to act all lovely dovey!! they’re both jealous and would prefer to have you alone- whispering sweet praise in your ear and placing soft kisses all over your body <3
Belphie just laughs, obviously you’re enjoying the attention so what’s the big deal? Beel’s nodding along- tho he really wants a kiss too, he’ll wait his turn.
and while he’ll let them indulge you for a few minutes Lucifer is quick to end it all, saying that you did wonderful as expected because; they all helped you. He walks over and kisses the top of your head, whispering just loud enough that you can hear him “I’m proud of you, darling.” and chuckles when he pulls away and sees your face is bright red.
Nsfw bit below here <3
Oooor Lucifer joins in on praising you!! You really did so well and Asmo’s right, that deserves a reward~ but what should it be?
Mammon shouts something about how you should just spend the day with him! He’ll spoil ya as much as you want!
Levi cuts Mammon off, stumbling over his words but promising that he’ll do whatever you want….uhhh if you want to spend time with him….to celebrate- and Satan cuts right back in saying that he’s the one that’s going to spoil you! It’s only fair!
‘n so on- obviously they’re not gonna agree right away, but it’s cute to watch you get excited over the way they fight for your attention!
Eventually it’s Belphie that has the best (?) (depends on who you ask tbh) idea. They could just share you-
Asmo whines that it’s not fair!! He didn’t get to say that first but Belphie just rolls his eyes and continues; after all, you worked so hard to get good grades~ it’ll be his…..their reward to you, kissing, praising and touching you until you can’t think anymore.
Just let them worry about you, yea? You know it’ll feel good too….all they want to do is make you feel good, spoil you, fill you up with cocks and cum until the only thoughts left in your cute little head are about them and how good it feels to be spoiled-
and for once the others all agree- if it’s what you want ofc <3
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double--blind · 1 year ago
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(SPOILERS) Ashley, self-esteem, and starvation
So, I adore Ashley. She's this intensely toxic, vicious, cruel, manipulative girl, and her psychology gives me hella brainworms. Andrew's not the only one whose head I wanna crack open and root around lol. She's thrown away the world just to keep her brother by her side, and she'll continue to do worse and worse for the same reason. She's pretty awful! I've been thinking about why, though. How did things get so bad? How did her soul get so dark?
We don't know everything (I'm waiting for those new eps patiently aND CLAWING AT THE WALLS AND FROTHING AT THE MOUTH but whatevs y'know whatevs I'm normal. I'm fine), yet what information we have been given is bumping around my brain like a DVD screensaver on hyperdrive
It's clear from the start that the roots of Ashley's issues lie in her horrible, neglectful upbringing, but it's hinted that even those outside of her family felt the same abt her. I'm lowkey even betting we'll learn later on that she was ostracized by her peers somehow. However, what's most disconcerting, I believe, is how little she was when the results of this alienation are first made apparent to us (bc kids aren't dumb; they notice this stuff oftentimes instinctively, impossibly young, before they even know what it means to be hated), and how devastating the consequences were.
(There's something decidedly childish abt her dream sequence in the "questionable" route—filled with crayon scribbles and rabbit plushies, the metaphors simplistic yet profound—which really hammers in how these sentiments are things that have made a home in her since childhood. Formative subconscious truths.)
Growing up unloved and noticeably unwanted by virtually everyone around her likely left her with a gaping hole in her heart that she'd spend the rest of her life trying to fill. She'd make friends, but she'd always worry that they'd leave her, that they'd betray her, nothing tangible or weighted enough in their connection to trust in its persistence. Why should she expect otherwise? Not even being bound by familial ties ensures affection if her parents are any indication.
Every lesson she'd ever learned had always taught her this: you are easy to abandon. You cannot love and be loved by virtue of your own worth.
You have to rip their affection from their clenched hands if you want it so bad.
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This understanding carries with it an undercurrent of degradation, instilling within Ashley a constant, biting inferiority complex which will never fail to be a source of insecurity. She will always be put last. She was difficult to raise, so her parents gave up on raising her. She was difficult to get along with, so her friends gave up on getting along with her.
It's an odd cycle. She's difficult bc she needs to be to get attention, but bc she's difficult, she can't keep it. Not without having whatever fondness she's managed to cultivate within someone fray at the seams, volatile and prone to collapse, bleeding toxicity.
Hence, her relationship w/Andrew.
By being the only reliable constant in her life, caring for her and keeping her company, Andrew essentially became her only source of happiness, and she's since learned not to bother with anyone else. Still, it's dangerous to keep all your eggs in one basket; since he is all she has, she must protect her place in his life with even greater ferocity, which becomes a torturous ordeal when coupled with her damaged self-esteem.
It's apparent in her quarrels with Andrew that she needs constant reassurance that she is wanted in some capacity or perceived in some positive light (getting pouty when Andrew says he's "stuck with her", needing to hear that she's pretty, needing him to "choose her", wanting him to say he loves her back, etc. etc.), yet her insecurity remains, bc unlike her, he's got options. She doesn't think he needs her like she needs him. He's got a gf, their parents love him, her friends love him. Why would he settle for her? What if someone better comes along? Someone she can't scare away?
Wouldn't he just leave her like everyone else?
Even before getting locked in the coffin of their apartment, starvation's been a constant theme in Ashley's life. She's constantly aching for love, and Andrew's the only one who can feed her. When you're forced to fight for a bite to eat or suffer every moment you hunger, you become ravenous—covetous—when faced with food; you don't want the hunger to return, so you lock down the source of your sustenance, wary of its retreat. Ashley's in a permanent state of intense insecurity, always anxious that the love that gives her life will leave her.
Andrew knows Ashley better than anyone else in the world, and it's obvs to everyone and him how desperate Ashley is for him, but I don’t think Andrew has truly, consciously processed the depth of that desperation. It's there buried in his head somewhere no doubt, but rn, he doesn't operate w/the direct awareness that he is everything. He is brother, mother, friend, and soulmate. He is life and love, air and water, everything that is good in the world—everything that there is to justify existence.
It's heartbreaking, in a way, that it's so difficult for Andrew to convince her of his loyalty. This goes further than his tendency to hide his true feelings, bc when push comes to shove, he's at her beck and call. Objectively, he's hers. She doesn't see that bc all she sees is all the ways she can lose him.
So, she gets bratty. She gets pushy, possessive, territorial. Manipulative. Gets under his skin, guilts him to exhaustion, bc she can't see him staying any other way, bc he doesn't get it, bc it works. He bends to her will, for her sake. For now. It's always "for now", bc he'll start slipping away again, and then it'll get worse. She does worse.
Becomes worse.
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moviecritc · 5 months ago
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second best ⋆ max verstappen
pairing: max verstappen x teammate!reader
summary: max realizes that your situationship isn't going anywhere, so he decides to start a pr relationship for his own public image
word count: 1K
warnings: angst, hurt without comfort
a/n: this turned out amazing actually, i'm very proud of it <3 yk i loveee to write abt this blond dutch
masterlist | wattpad | letterboxd
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“I think it's better if we stop seeing each other.”
Y/N frowned slightly. She was under Max's arm, lying on the bed in the hotel in Imola.
“We’re on the same team, Maxie. We see each other all the time,” she said, completely oblivious to what Max was saying. She even smiled a little.
“I mean this,” Max sat up, forcing her to do the same. He swallowed a bit. “I think we should stop sleeping together.”
Y/N pressed her lips together and wiped the trace of sweat from her forehead. “Oh,” was all she could articulate as she chewed over that sentence. “Why?”
“For our careers,” he said immediately, as if he had it premeditated. “There are already a lot of rumors, if this got out…”
“What?” That didn’t make any sense. “We've been sleeping together for over a year, and now all of a sudden you're worried about rumors. Don’t bullshit me, Max. What the hell is wrong with you?” Y/N felt around the edge of the bed, searching for her underwear.
“I'm telling you, this is affecting our careers.”
Y/N clicked her tongue and stood up, finishing getting dressed. “Bullshit, Max. When you want to tell me what's really going on, let me know.”
Y/N left the room, slamming the door. Max leaned back, knowing that Y/N was right. It wasn’t about their careers, but about the pressure. His father and the rest of the team were pressuring him to have a relationship with a model, and YN was an obstacle in that equation.
Max never explained anything to her. They stopped seeing each other outside of work environments and even while working, they avoided each other as much as possible. Y/N refused to feel hurt. It wasn’t a breakup because there was nothing to break. In the end, they were just two teammates with too much sexual tension to satisfy. Even if that tension lasted a year and a half, three vacations together, a Christmas dinner, and countless private dates.
Y/N was determined to move on, focusing on her job, fighting for the title, and maybe—just maybe—accepting that date with Carlos at the end of the season.
But Max had other ideas, because two weeks after the breakup, the pages were on fire because finally, someone had conquered the cold heart of Max Verstappen. He and a woman nine years older had been seen dining and kissing in Monaco.
She was surprised, that was the last thing she expected from Max. Nine years older than him. Y/N couldn't help but dig a little, stalking her profile and seeing how pretty she was. That really hurt, had it meant so little to him?
Y/N flew to Monaco alone when she used to go in Max's private jet. From then on, she realized how much Max was in her routine. Arriving at her apartment, she found it cold with the plants dried up; she hardly had any clothes there. She knew she’d have to write to Max to get her things back, but she delayed it as long as possible—which wasn’t long. Y/N wrote to her friends to see if they wanted to go out, but no one responded; she hadn't written to them in over four months.
She spent that night alone at home, looking at her phone every now and then without expecting any messages. She found herself drinking and then went out for a walk, desperate to feel something. The next morning, photos of her were out, looking horrible with traces of mascara under her eyes. She also woke up to a simple message from Max:
Can we meet?
They agreed to meet at her apartment, Y/N knew the way almost with her eyes closed.
“Good morning,” said Max. He looked as usual, shorts and a t-shirt, a bit of gel in his hair, and clean-shaven.
“Hello,” Y/N said, clearing her throat. She stood still at the door until Max motioned for her to come in.
“Come in, please,” he said calmly. She nodded and entered, looking for traces of that woman, though the apartment still smelled of her perfume.
“Is she not here?” she asked, turning on her heels to look at him.
“No. That's what I wanted to talk to you about.”
Y/N raised an eyebrow. “You want to talk to me about your girlfriend?”
“She’s not my girlfriend.”
She let out a laugh, the same thing she had told her friends at a dinner while he had a hand almost reaching her inner thigh.
“You never have girlfriends, do you?”
“Y/N, it’s not what you think.”
She crossed her arms. “You know what I think? I think you’re a hypocrite. A damn hypocrite who, because I didn’t suit him, found someone easier.”
Max approached Y/N. “It’s PR, they forced me.”
“They forced you?” she let out a painful laugh. “Did they force you before or after ending things with us?”
Max stayed silent. They had pressured him, but the final decision had been his. He couldn’t find a way to explain himself. That silence meant everything to Y/N.
“You're pathetic. Totally pathetic.”
“Y/N, I’m sor-” he took half a step towards her but backed off immediately.
“Bullshit,” Y/N exploded. “Do you think apologizing is enough? You treated me like a fucking toy, damn it.”
“I didn't… I never wanted to hurt you,” Max choked on his words.
“But neither did you want to treat me well.”
Max stayed silent, feeling like the stupidest man on earth. He wanted to shout that she was the best thing that had happened to him in a long time while kissing her until he ran out of breath. But he said nothing. Y/N looked away with a long sigh.
“I’m going to collect my clothes,” she said, clearly disappointed in her voice. She hoped that Max would follow her, not let her pack her things and beg her to stay. That he’d tell her she was worthy of love.
Max waited, sitting on his couch, running his hands over his face, searching for the words.
Y/N came out of the room and walked past the living room, intending to leave without saying goodbye.
“I'll break up with Kelly,” Max stood up, stopping her with his words.
“Do you think that will help? You’ll still hide me as if you’re ashamed.”
“Y/N…” He couldn’t find the words.
“No. I'm leaving. I'm tired. Of you and all your crap.”
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