#i should mention again that the criticism i'm talking about was actually quite a while back

[ageless-aislynn]

For 10 years, my fic with by far the most hits on AO3 was "Five Times Oliver Held Felicity (And The One Time She Held Him)."

And I'm proud of it, don't get me wrong. I think it actually contains some of my better writing. 🤷‍♀️ But it ended up being a one-off sort of thing: I thought I'd write more Olicity or Arrow in general and then just... didn't.

However, it was so far ahead of all of my other fics in hits, I figured nothing would ever challenge it for the top spot. I hadn't checked my stats in quite a while and so I was surprised to discover that the "Five Times" Olicity fic was now in second place.

I've written 114 fics in the Flash fandom and none of them have remained in my top 5, that was another surprise! But 3 of my 11 Halo fics now are: "15 Minutes," (John/female reader) "Side Effects" (John/Cortana, John/Kai, very NSFW) and "Recreation" (Kai/male reader, same world as "15 Minutes").

Now, why is any of that important? It's for the sheer fact that I don't write sci-fi military fiction well AT ALL. My interest has always been in the more domestic and romantic themes, for lack of a better thing to call it. "You write the moments between the adventures" was what somebody told me about my Doctor Who fics ("Balancing Act," which is third place on that list, is a multi-chaptered Ten/Donna NSFW romantic fix-it fic where every chapter clearly takes place after some sort of new adventure that I don't show you but instead reference 😉). I agree with that assessment, that IS basically what I write.

A little while ago, I read somebody criticizing a particular type of Halo fanfiction. They didn't name mine by name but basically said it wasn't written "properly" like it's "supposed" to be and was everything that's "wrong" with uninformed people writing things they shouldn't be.

Here's the kicker: I think they're wrong. If they would've pointed at somebody else's fic and said that same thing, I would've wanted to jump in and tell them to get over themselves. People are allowed to enjoy whatever they want to enjoy! If somebody wrote a story that's "wrong" in your opinion, then all you have to do is scroll on by.

Heck, if somebody wants to write about Master Chief riding into battle on a T-rex while waving a glowing, magic sword given to him personally by Gandalf the Grey... Well, dang it, I'd read it, lol! Yeah, that wouldn't take place in canon but what is fanfic even for if not to allow all sorts of exploration? What if Halo had dinosaurs and magic swords? What if Chief and Silver Team or Blue Team or a brand new team of OC Spartans desperately needed to go buy new curtains for their apartments after they'd hung out for a while at the most happening coffee shop on Reach where Thel 'Vadam was the barista who made amazing specialty drinks while also heading up the local garage band?

(Yeah, I made that manip for something else but might as well get more use out of it, right? 😂)

Anyway, you get my drift. If one of my fellow Halo writers would've gotten criticism like that, I would've challenged it. But it was too close to my own work and instead, I absorbed it. I feel like I shouldn't be writing for Halo, I'm too wrong, I'm too off. I mean, no wonder I'm struggling to finish my WIPs, right? That's the first thing that pops to mind when I try to write anything: Yeah, but you're doing this all wrong. You should be ashamed of what you're writing. You're insulting the real fans of Halo by trivializing the characters like this. You're disrespecting actual military people living today by getting too much of this wrong.

And so seeing those stats at AO3 really meant something to me. I know I don't write authentic action-orientated sci-fi military fiction. I know that. But I love the characters and I love seeing them in situations they wouldn't be in in canon and I can't even tell you why. But people have been reading my fics? At least, I hope the hits aren't coming from people passing the links around with a big ol' ZOMG, please don't ever write Halo like THIS IDIOT, okay??? attached to them. 🤞😣🤞😉

This sounds pretty silly seeing it written down like this. I know, it's like, Get over yourself, Ais, not everything is about you! But I've been really struggling to get to the root of my writer's block so I could figure out what's keeping me from finishing my WIPs. And seeing those stats tonight and realizing how many more times my Halo fics seem to have been read over my other fandoms...?

Well, that might only mean that Halo is just the more popular fandom right now and it's nothing more than that. But it's nice to think that, even though there are people out there who think somebody unqualified like me shouldn't be posting their ridiculous little stories, maybe there are other people who've enjoyed them, even as unauthentic as they are?

I dunno. Food for thought.

I'm hoping this will inspire me to at least finish up the next chapter for "15 Minutes." 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Thanks for reading. *hugs* to you if you've ever or are currently struggling with anything like this. Tell your stories, they're worth it. I believe in you. 🤗🤗🤗

I just need to try harder to believe in myself, hm? 🤔

PS - I've gotten SO MANY wonderful comments on my Halo fics, so why is it that the hate that might not even have been meant for me is so much louder in my head and crowds the nice comments out? I hate that, I truly do. 😖

[squiddy-god]

hsr men manhandling pt2

(Blade, sampo, loucha)

Once again here we are, lust in my heart. The other one is quite popular so here we go with a part two<3 i really liked the way the last one turned out so i decided to do more characters, i think the next one i'm doing is gonna be female characters. Maybe a little sampo slander (i love him i promise) 

♥︎REQUESTS ARE OPEN♥︎

Cw: smut, suggestive content to nsfw, manhandling, top! Characters, dom characters, no pronouns, gn! Reader, fem/ftm/masc/mtf friendly, established relationship, implied chubby reader, rough sex, penetration, oral (you and character receiving), fuzzy handcuffs (sampo), marking (blade), stupid/silly petnames (sampo), dare i say…a bit of switch sampo??face fucking,  as always everything is consensual (very sexy) and aftercare is always given even if not explicitly mentioned 

Blade 

AUGH 

Bladie is legitimately strong as hell, but the thing is that whether he's doing it on purpose or accident depends on the situation 

Blade manhandles you a lot, he tends to be a man of few words so if he needs you moved he is moving you, if he wants affection he is moving you

Sitting next to him and he wants you sat in his lap where you should be? Hes grabbing you, hands gripping your waist as he pulls you against him

Speaking of that his kisses are quite similar, grabbing your jaw and turning your face so he can kiss you

Or a hand on the back of your head that pushes your face together, 

Blade likes having you lay on top of him and he will actually drag you on top of him 

These are things he does unintentionally that end with you getting man handled 

But let's not forget that dear bladie is a bit (read: very) feral

He is the king of manhandling, im talking he throws you on the bed type manhandling

Picking you up and pinning you to the wall while holding the backs of your knees to keep you good and folded in half.

His lower body pressed against you so you can feel how hard he his while he grinds into you 

And he KNOWS HE KNOWS what he's doing when he squishes handfuls of your soft fletch in his hands while he folds you however he likes, he knows how much it turns you on 

He's rough, rough hands and rough chipped edges that used to be smooth. Blade as a whole is a rough man and his bedroom habits are no different- his every touch and movement carries a strength and sort of force behind it 

There's a part of him that revels in the fact that his roughness turns you on, the little shudder that runs through your body when you feel his finger dig into your hips and waist 

I feel like marking plays a huge role in the manhandling actually because blade wants to see you so covered in his marks that they resemble the scars on his body 

He is covered in them, not an inch spared- and so neither will yours

Pinning you face down with his hips rutting against yours while he sucks hickeys and bites between your shoulder blades (im hilarious) and neck. 

Sampo

Him 

He is fully aware and it's on purpose 2000% 

He teases you about it relentlessly the second that he finds out, honestly he probably found out either by accident or because he was teasing you 

He runs up to you, picking you up while he kisses your stomach face buried it its softness- and when he looks up seeing how flustered you are hes already working overtime 

“Ohhhh ho ho! Now sweetcheeks don't tell me you like when ol’ sampo’s rough with ya” 

He's so mean! He bullies you honestly and he doesn't even feel bad! 

SHOVES HIS COLD HANDS UNDER YOUR SHIRT AND JUST HOLDS YOU THERE SO YOU CAN'T ESCAPE! The meanie! And it never lasts being cute either because it turns into him grabbing your tummy and waist, then hes going for your chest and oops his hands are in your pants and he's using you to the nearest secluded spot 

a lot of his manhandling comes from squishing and squeezing you 

He's a tummy and thigh man and i won't be taking criticism because im right- aha told me themselves 

He loves and adores your tummy and thighs, squeezing, groping, he really can't get enough and that leads to him manhandling you

Like i said lust in my heart- so im gonna need you to hear me out on this one guys i need, and i mean NEED sampo in one of those sexy cop costumes 

See it's funny because he is a criminal- 

But like he's pinning you down, the sound of clicking as he cuffs you with the fuzzy handcuffs before he is jerking your his back to slot oh so perfectly against his 

I feel like sampo kinda likes when you man handle him a bit too (i wanna grab his bewbs) and he wouldn't mind if YOU were the one in the sexy cop costume, the short shorts showing off the thighs he loves so much as he lets you pin and cuff him~ 

Sampo likes face fucking and its one of the ways he manhandles you. moving your head up and down on his length while he has the nerve to coo at you 

You can feel his hands cradle your head and you already know what's coming (him lmao) “come on love-bug wanna give poor sampo a treat?” and its the way he sounds almost desperate that has you always nodding your head as you feel his fingers tighten before he's pushing you all the way down 

I hate him <3 (i'm a big liar)

Loucha 

Now here me out this man is a gentleman

Wouldn't dream of manhandling you because he is oh so gentle, so sweet to you its almost- almost suspicious

That being said when he does it's on purpose

For all his gentlemanly acts there is something writhing just below the surface, the most miniscule glint in his eyes and the slight amount of extra pressure in his hand as he guides you with him through the streets 

But he is a man with seemingly infinite self control 

But thats only what it seems like

Even one with an abundance (haha) of patience can sometimes have said patience grow thin, its times like this that loucha takes it upon himself to remind you that things are often not as they appear

 Fear not however, most of his “frustration” comes when you try to squirm away or hide- loucha loves to see and hear you, watch your face twitch and your body write at the onslaught (abundance hahahaha) of pleasure that his hands bestow 

He keeps your hands pinned nicely above your head to make sure there is no hiding your lovely face from him, and it shows his slight sadistic streak because the way he looks down at you?

Those lovely olive green eyes looking down at you laced with something akin to condescension- as if you were so silly to attempt to hide away from his gaze,  

I think loucha is a big fan of you riding him, his hands able to grip fistfull of your plush hips and thighs when your legs start to burn and he can manhandle you up and down his length to his heart's content  

And he just coos up at you, voice rumbling as he holds you tight again him and all but slams his hips forward, the languid movement of his hips has stopped and been replaced with the deep bruising movements that have you clawing at his back and the sheets 

“Ah ah my sweet, my mercy has a limit when you have denied me the pleasure of seeing you like this” and you realize through the way his hands roughly grasp at every soft inch of you that it was indeed mercy, but the way he all but moans out his desire to simply see you writhe like this beneath him makes it all the sweeter to test the limits of said mercy 

[boothillssugarmomma]

Hello hello!

Can I request a Dr. Ratio x reader that's a team leader and they're assigned to work together, and while he's complaining (whining) about her team they're not having it and they bicker (divorced parents vibes fr) (they're both in denial of their feelings). Just Ratio not being used to someone else talking back to him (pls make them make out thank you for your time regardless, I love your writing!

THIS IDEA GAVE ME SO MUCH BUTTERFLIES MAKING 😭 I hope you like it as much as I did creating it!

🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀

Sparks of Synergy

(Ratio x Fem!Reader)

cw-: mean!ratio, insults of intelligence, heavily suggestive, smidge of nudity mentioned

🎀 authorsnote: this is my first request fic and I literally screamed and giggled when I saw it!

please don't steal my work!

Taglist🎀HSR Master List🎀Other Lists🎀

"This part of this project is so simple! How do you not understand!? We've already been through this part multiple times!" Ratio could already feel an argument or a migraine coming. All it took was one glance down at your paper for him to practically combust.

"Fix this." He orders. He's spent hours going back and forth with you, hovering over your shoulder like a vulture.

He could spot all sorts of microscopic mistakes that he just was practically begging to point out. He doesn't exactly know why he even bothers. It's obvious that you were hopeless the moment you were recruited for his team.

Though, he suppose it's better for your dimwitted self and the rest of your team to come to him instead of doing it yourselves.

Aeons, he wouldn't be able to take in the sight of you doing this project alone and failing or asking for help from another bumbling, no-nothing dumbass.

The doctor is the best chance you've got with actually completing correctly, whatever it is you need help with...and he wouldn't have it...Any. Other. Way.

"Just because you're the team leader of this little project doesn't mean you can be so bossy." You hum and keep working.

"Bossy? Me?" Ratio lets out a scoff. That's rich coming from you.

He raises an incredulous eyebrow as his stare narrows at your ridiculous comment. Does this fool have the guts to insult him?

He rolls his eyes at the fact that you had the audacity to claim that he's "bossy" when he's simply trying to keep things together. He's not bossy, he has a title to live up to, unlike the likes of you.

"Yes...bossy..." Your eyes glance over at his in a glare. "You want to make the team quit?" You scoff.

"Please." Ratio shoots a condescending glance your way, leaning back against a wall and crossing his arms.

"If they aren't capable enough to handle my expectations and methods, then it's best for them to leave. I'm doing them a favor here. You should be thanking me, quite honestly. I am your team leader after all. I know what's best for this group."

He smirks. You should be grateful that he even allowed you to be a part of this team at all.

as you continue to bicker and fight the whole day the rest of the team just watches on in silence, until one by one they all start to leave

Eventually you both notice that you two are the only one in the room. Ratio let out an exasperated scoff and pinches the bridge of his nose. The headache coming back.

"Look at what you've done now." He snaps, his gold eyes snapping back to you once more. "You and your incessant nagging caused the others to leave. What a surprise."

The sarcasm was evident in his voice. He can't stand this.

"Oh you're going to blame this on ME!?" You scoff and fold your arms. "If anything it was your snide comments..."

Ratio let's out a sharp laugh, scoffing once again and turning his chin in a prideful way.

"What snide comments? The only thing I said was criticism that would help you improve on your work. You, just like the rest of those dimwits, can't seem to understand. Do you have any idea of the standards I live up to?"

"It's the way you say it Veritas." You sigh and rub your forehead with your index and thumb.

The purple haired smart ass stiffens. His golden gaze locked onto your exasperated expression. How irritating. How annoying. It was like a buzzing insect flying near his ear, one he longed to swat at.

"Perhaps try working harder instead of being so sensitive, idiot..." He scoffs. He was simply offering constructive criticism. It's not his fault that your little self couldn't take it.

"Ok you see!" You groan and push off the table. "That's what they don't like!"

Ratio scowls slightly. The audacity of you was absolutely ridiculous. He steps closer.

"What, do you propose I use a more 'soft' approach? Perhaps a 'softer' tone?" *He mocks, a sarcastic smile stretching his features. Soft? That's laughable. He doesn't do soft.

"You're just like them. Soft and sensitive. I have no tolerance for useless emotions. Only facts."

"Maybe you'd have more friends if you were nicer!" You raise your voice and clap your hands together before taking a breath.

Ratio laughs lowly, mocking your outburst. You had no right to judge him like that.

"How childish. If they truly were my friend, they'd stand by my honest and factual criticism. You see it as 'mean'. I do not. What is so wrong with telling it how it is?

I don't expect you to understand. Your feeble brain simply wouldn't be able to comprehend the standards."

"Ratio not everyone appreciates your random analysis of them." You scoff.

The doctor gives you a condescending side-glance, rolling his eyes. Random analysis? Surely you were aware that everything he thought of was correct?

"The facts are just the facts. People can either be offended by it or be mature and understand. Clearly, maturity is not a word you know."

"You seem sensitive and weak minded...GET OUT!" You mock him and throw a piece of chalk at the chalkboard before folding your arms.

It takes all of Ratio's self-restraint to not burst out into a hysterical, mocking laughter. His face twists into a sneer. You were the delusional and insensitive one here.

It's not long before Dr. Ratio had pushed you back until you were pinned against the wall his body pressed so close to yours that you could feel his soft, warm breath hitting the side of your neck.

"Weak minded?" He chuckles lowly.

"I would never dream of being weak. Ever."

You both just gaze in each other's eyes for what seems like an eternity before you clear your throat. "We should probably...get back to work..."

Dr. Ratio had almost forgot he was pinning you to the wall, but at the comment, it had made him pull back away slightly. He stares for a few seconds before glancing away and scoffing once more.

"Right, there's no time to waste on worthless chatter. I suppose it's up to me to be the bigger man once again and carry this team." He crosses his arms.

You roll your eyes as you walk back over to the table and start working.

After a small while there is no talking or bickering...until you did a slight mishap on an equation

He often glanced over quietly to make sure the work you were doing was correct. There were a few moments where he had to glance away from how badly your mistakes had irked him. He took in a breath to calm himself down.

He would be lying if he said that the silence wasn't slightly refreshing. But...he's quickly pulled out of that mindset when you made a mistake.

He lets out an irritated sigh and stands.

"Really? Another mistake? At this rate you might as well give me the paper for me to finish it myself."

"Don't touch it!" You rip the paper away from his hands.

He scoffed, his eyes narrowing as a sneer stretches on his lips. He takes another step closer to you, crossing his arms.

"Care to repeat that, idiot? You dare to talk back to me?" Ratio's gaze darkened slightly, his golden eyes practically gleaming in the light.

"Oh don't act like you're all high and mighty!" You stalk towards him poking his chest with your finger. "You're not the big bad Ratio everyone says you are!"

The doctor lets out a mocking scoff, his gaze locked onto you in a cold glare. He swats your little finger away like it was nothing.

"Big bad Ratio? You clearly are more ridiculous than I had originally anticipated. What, are you scared of me? Do my words... frighten you?" He steps even closer into your personal space, his voice dropping into a low growl.

Your heart flutters as your eyes lock again. His gold gaze holding yours so perfectly. But your stance never falters.

Ratio's eyes narrow as he can feel his irritation rising once again. Why is this bothersome woman making his heart beat like this?

He scoffs.

"You're getting too comfortable around me. Have I not made it obvious that I'm superior than you in every way?" He grabs your chin with his thumb and index, angling your face up.

"Superior? Superior!?" You scoff and laugh.

Ratio sneers, practically looming over you.

"Do you want me to list down everything that makes me superior to you, little one? The list would go on for miles and miles."

He stares down at you with an intimidating smirk, his thumb pressing against your chin almost possessively.

You glance down at his lips before locking eyes again. "Shut it...doctor..."

Ratio smirks once more, a dark chuckle escaping his lips. His thumb traces your bottom lip slightly, admiring your features for a brief second before he lets out another scoff.

"You have the audacity to tell me that? Oh, you are a fool. A very adorable fool...now you should shut it."

"Shut. It. Or. I'll. Make. You." You whisper darkly.

Ratio's smirk widens for a moment, clearly amused and slightly caught off guard by your boldness. He lets out another scoff and leans down close to your ear, his hot breath brushing against your skin.

"And. How. Precisely. do you propose yourself to accomplish such a thing, hm?" He murmurs, a mocking but low chuckle falling from his lips.

You lean up and cut him off with a kiss. A soft one before pulling away slightly. You both gaze into each other's eyes.

Ratio's golden eyes widened slightly in surprise, not anticipating such a move. You...kissed him? How dare you act so brazenly? Yet...why did he like it...?

He lets the surprise linger in his expression for a few more seconds before he takes quick action. Ratio closes whatever space was in between you and pushes you back against the wall, his lips pressing against yours in a passionate and possessive kiss.

As the kiss grows to be more passionate small sounds can be heard escaping both of your throats as you entangle closer together

Ratio's hand wraps around your waist tightly, his other hand slipping into your hair to keep you closer against him. Your soft lips were so addicting, it made his heart flutter strangely in his chest. His tongue darted out to slide against your bottom lip, begging for entrance into your mouth.

You open your mouth just enough for his tongue to slide inside, and you begin to fight for dominance.

His tongue immediately sought for yours, exploring the inside of your mouth as a low groan escaped his throat. He began to press you more and more into the wall, his body pressing tightly onto yours with an iron grip on your waist.

He pulls you away from the wall to lay you on the table as he continues to kiss you

Ratio's hand traveled down to grab your thigh and hoist it up so your calf wraps around his waist as he deepened the kiss with a small hum, his body hovered over yours in an almost possessive manner. His long, slender fingers would slowly begin to slip under your shirt.

"MhM!" You groan into his mouth as he slides a hand over your breast.

Ratio let's out a low chuckle as he slowly begins to slide your shirt off, wanting to feel more and more of your skin against his. He began to trail small, light kisses down your neck, gently sucking on a particularly sensitive spot.

"V-Veritas" You whisper softly in his ear.

Ratio gives one final, rough suck onto that particular spot on the side of your neck, creating a small bruise. He pulled back slightly to look down at you. A low chuckle escaped his lips once more as he leaned in to brush his hot breath against your ear.

"Saying my name so nicely...You're almost making me want to ruin you."

You roll your eyes softly and laugh quietly.

"So doctor how long have you been hiding these feelings for me?" You tease as you kiss his cheek.

Ratio let's out a scoff, his face quickly flushing a dark red at your boldness. He was getting teased by you of all people. He doesn't remember the last time anyone has gotten the best of him in such a way.

He clears his throat and leans down to press a bruising kiss upon your jaw, beginning to trail his lips across your neck.

"...for a while..." He reluctantly answers.

"And is this your mhM way of asking me out?" You smirk through a small moan and tilt his chin up with your hand to meet your gaze.

Ratio's face flushed a dark shade of red at your question, his eyes narrowing as he let out a scoff. He was the Veritas Ratio. You have some nerve to tease him.

It takes him an embarrassingly long time to answer, his brain scrambled. He can feel your soft hand on his chin, gently making him meet your gaze.

"...I suppose so." He finally admits sheepishly.

"Does this mean you're going to be nicer to me?" You lean forward to kiss his forehead.

The doctors golden eyes widened slightly at the small kiss on his forehead, his face flushing a deeper shade of red. He didn't expect you to get this affectionate with him. He glanced off to the side with a scoff.

"I-I already am nice to you. I'm...simply just more blunt than other people." He mumbled almost defensively.

You both pause as you throw your head back to laugh. "You're very funny doctor!"

His eyebrows furrow slightly in annoyance. You...laughed at him. He would have reprimanded you if it wasn't for the fact that your laughter was incredibly cute. He would huff in irritation, crossing his arms.

"It's not nice to laugh at me, you know..." He grumbles with a slight pout.

"Fine fine... I'm sorry~" you lean forward to whisper in his ear.

Ratio's face flushed an even darker shade of red as your soft whisper sent a shiver down his spine. His hands gripped slightly onto your hips, holding you against him firmly. He let out a sigh at your teasing words.

"...you're insufferable...I hate how adorable you are." He mumbled lowly, his voice dropping a degree as he stared down at you.

As he lifts you off the table and puts you back on the ground you smile softly "Yeah but you like meee~" You poke his chest softly.

Ratio quietly scoffs again, although his face was still flushed a dark shade of red. Why, you...! You had him wrapped around your finger. His eyes narrowed, yet the corner of his lip twitched into a smirk.

His arm loosely looped around your waist and bring you close to him, letting out a low chuckle as he rested his chin on top of your head.

"Shut up...you are so fuckin...insufferable." He mumbled lowly, not denying anything you said.

You press a kiss to his throat and smile. "Shall we get back to work...my love?"

A shiver raced down Ratio's spine at the small kiss, his eyes widening slightly in surprise. His heart thumped in his chest, the soft fluttering feeling in his chest only growing. No, not during work hours. He must not get distracted until the work is done.

He gave a firm nod, his golden eyes locking onto your gaze.

"...Yes, my dear..."

As he turns to the table you smirk. "Oh and Veritas?" You smile innocently as he turns back to you.

"After work..." You slide a hand up his chest until it rests on his heart. "I want you to show me just how insufferable I. Really. Am."

Ratio's eyes widen slightly before they narrow into a smirk, catching onto your words almost instantly. He raised an eyebrow as he watched you.

"A challenge? You seem so confident, my idiot..." He murmured. He grabbed the hand on his chest and brought it to his lips, placing a kiss to the palm of your hand.

He leaned close once more, and with a seductive whisper, and smirk, answered.

"You're on."

🎀End🎀

[dorayakichan]

Hello 🤗 can I pls request dating + jealousy headcanons for Harry from windbreaker? Hope you have a great day 😊 thank you ❤️

Harry Shepherd Windbreaker : dating + jealousy headcanon

Genre: headcanon, fluff

CW: MDNI, slight mention of smut, fluff, jealousy

A/N: I've got a weird crush for Harry so I'm really happy when I get requests with him. I hope I can get even more! Thank you for the request!!💕​

If we could start with something, the first thing to say is that Harry is not the nicest kind of boyfriend. He has quite a foul mouth and doesn’t differentiate where or with whom he uses that. 

There is no doubt though, that he tries to correct that habit of his when he is talking with you. And you can sense that and are extremely happy that for you he is trying to change that.

He is the kind of boyfriend that notices. Even if he is throwing a fit about a race, even if he is blinded by rage due to something, the slightest flinch or scared expression coming from you will make him immediately stop what he is doing and try to calm down. He doesn’t want to scare you in any way possible.

Although he might have a thing or two to say about your cooking he never leaves the plate unfinished, he actually asks for a refill just to get it over with so he won’t have to eat the same thing again next time. Yet, he tries not to hurt your feelings by giving just some subtle constructive criticism about adding a bit more salt or stuff like that. 

He is the kind who loves showering with you, there is something about the feeling of the water dripping down your frame that makes him go crazy. As you both wash each other's body, so close skins, brushing against one another excite him and at the same time, relax him to such an extent he will do one of the two things after. Intense sex or sleep hugging you tightly like a little baby. 

No matter which of the two he chooses to do he will end up falling asleep holding you because your presence calms him immensely. 

He is rough during sex and he does try hard not to be. No matter how much he does, your body will never end up unbruised. How could it anyway with such a big and strong guy, you are lucky to end up with just that. His stamina too is one of a kind, especially when he sees you dressed sexily. So don’t do that if you don’t want to end up staying in bed for a whole week or worse end up at the doctor. Embarrassing! Do not recommend it.

Jealous? He is extremely to the point you fear the idea of someone else coming up to flirt with you because you know well enough Harry won’t be calm about it, he will be furious. You are his and only his and no one should even dare to approach you.  

Well, not many have the guts to as you both stay attached to the hip most of the time. Who would dare approach you while the bulky , huge blonde guy stands next to you anyway? 

He also won’t let it pass if anyone catcalls you or stares at you for more than a normal person should. Yet, he never stops you from dressing in any kind of way you won’t.

“It’s fine I can beat them all up, so if you like it wear it.” He says if you ever worry about wearing way too revealing outfits.

[arceespinkgun]

Thoughts on Rung/Skids

I realized that I've never actually explained anything about why I ship Rung/Skids, and that it's not a ship I see discussed often... and it must be kind of weird to see I ship it given that I'm not even a MTMTE/LL fan. In the same vein as that one post I made where I said I personally felt like an interesting and natural couple would probably have been Tailgate/Swerve in MTMTE/LL, I want to talk about this relationship.

I've mentioned before that when it comes to many different things about the series, when I read it as it was coming out I misinterpreted a lot of elements. Somehow, I thought that Rung/Skids was a canon romance, or at the very least that Rung having romantic feelings for Skids was canon! There's an issue of MTMTE where Ratchet tells Skids he should spend more time with Rung and Skids brings Rung a drink after this, and I thought this was like a date...? When it became clear that Skids had interest in Nautica, I wasn't sure what to make of that at the time. I thought maybe he just liked both of them in different ways.

But I also found the relationship between Rung and Skids in general to be unsettling and thought Rung might even be a predator given that Skids is a character who clearly needed mental help and Rung was the ship's therapist. Since the issues in which Rung ends up quitting his job were also the only time we saw Skids in therapy with him and depicted Froid taunting Rung about his connection with Skids and targeting him, I thought all of these themes were intentional. Especially since Skids's guilt and suicidality began increasing after that point. And despite how repulsive I found the connection between Skids and Rung at the time the series was coming out, as it went on and those characters went through some of the worst things possible, I also thought that nobody deserves to go through what they did.

Before Rung committed suicide in Lost Light, I thought the fact that he tells famously-married Chromedome and Rewind (who had also struggled with suicidality) to forgive themselves, then steps into his office sad and alone, was implying that Rung blamed himself for things including not being present for Skids's suicide... especially given that right before Rung kills himself, he thinks back to the time Skids first saved him.

Time passed, I eventually realized through seeing things James Roberts said and that fans said that I was wrong, these characters weren't intended to be romantically involved. I saw that JRo said in an interview that he didn't think Rung saw people in a romantic way.

When I ship characters it's in all kinds of ways. While personally I do ship these two romantically what's really important to me is just highlighting the significance of their bond.

Years later, now that I've reread MTMTE/LL again, I see things a bit differently and actually ended up shipping the characters. Now, I feel like JRo just didn't comprehend therapists or their jobs very well and wasn't prepared to write about these subjects effectively. For example, ethically-minded Ultra Magnus (a character Rung specifically wanted to see in sessions) saw nothing odd about going drinking with Rung, Skids, Whirl who was another patient of Rung's etc. at the very beginning. Rung jokes about his nemesis being people who don't know the difference between psychiatry and psychotherapy... but that's an error JRo makes himself later on. I see Froid as a very flat, not particularly insightful commentary on therapists, if he even is that. I could go on and on. This combined with ableist themes in MTMTE/LL made me reassess Rung and appreciate him more as just a character with a fun personality, given that the story just isn't well-written or thought-out enough for me to critically engage with his questionable behavior.

I think what I ended up liking about the dynamic between these characters this time around were two things: how natural their relationship feels, and the themes it engages with. When it comes to the former, we see Skids and Rung meet very early on, and the development of their friendship is paced very naturally. Rung is the one who explains to Skids what the Lost Light's mission is, Skids saves Rung, visits Rung in the medbay, rouses him from a coma, they go on vacation together... I could go on and on. One issue I have with MTMTE/LL is that sometimes plot threads or relationships go without followup or development for ages, or it feels like the story is focusing on the wrong things and is paced poorly. But when it comes to these characters, everything is paced well when it comes to the two of them becoming closer over time. I never felt like there were huge gaps in seeing them interact or anything like that, and when Skids dies, Rung's grief isn't glossed over (unlike the grief of other characters, but this isn't supposed to be a post about bad writing so lol). Their dynamic was also believable and fun and I could easily picture their conversations, but didn't have to take a lot of time to imagine them because they are shown talking to each other.

Then on the thematic side... there is a lot going on that could be very moving. Both of these characters suffered amnesia. Both suffered immense guilt. They both commit suicide. They're part of the same friend group. One of the only things Rung remembered from being in a coma was Skids smiling at him. Skids basically Sleeping Beauty'd Rung... by annoying him awake lol Rung is often treated like an unmemorable person, but Skids has a special super-memorization ability and also always remembers Rung and helps him. He even defended him to Getaway once. Skids used to be religious but lost his faith because of the terrible things Primus appeared to allow... and Rung actually is Primus, cares for Skids, but also doesn't necessarily have the ability to help others the way he so desperately wants to. But Skids died before Rung remembered who he was, so when Skids was alive, he cared for Rung as he is and never learned this about him, which is bittersweet. Even more tragic in a way, Rung's most desperate wish was to be remembered but ended up being forgotten... but Skids died before he could ever forget him. I think it's telling that before killing himself, Rung didn't flash back to his first meeting with Skids, he instead flashed back to the first time he was remembered by him. And the image of Skids pulling him up into a vent is very much a "together in death" sort of moment. Oh, also, in the alternate, Functionist Universe, Rung only produced photonic crystals after two million years of torture. But in the main timeline, he starts producing them after mourning Skids's death!!!

There's also this panel, which was drawn this way because as a relic of a plotline in which Skids was pining for Nautica, but I didn't know that until recently. I thought it was meant to indicate that Skids already knew he was going to commit suicide at the first opportunity.

I think something that stands out about them to me and encapsulates their relationship is the moment where Skids travels into the consciousness of Adaptus. Skids has no context to know what is actually happening, so from his perspective this could have been an amazing new world/reality and a fascinating or potentially transcendent experience (that's certainly how other characters react when studying it later). But then Skids runs back out without hesitation as soon as Rung calls out for his help.

TL;DR I don't really have a conclusion, I guess I just find them to be a really obvious ship, think a lot of their interactions were compelling in canon, and I think more should have been done to address a lot of the interesting themes their relationship brought up. I don't think I'm the right person to really engage with a lot of this, but felt I ought to share my thoughts with the fandom anyway. Most of all, I think Nautica and Rung talking about their shared grief would have been very interesting, and is something I'm surprised hasn't been done in fandom more often. I'm also kind of surprised that other what-if scenarios like what Skids would have made of Rung being Primus I also don't see explored much.

[3416]

The nylander convo pre covid years was def reaching the pervasiveness, but never quite got as personal the way it has with mitch. like I distinctly remember don cherry (just threw up in my mouth a little bit) continuously going off about nylander which then made everyone else talk about him and it was just an endless cycle. they painted him as aloof and felt that he didn't care about toronto, but they never really got as mean as people have with mitch now. everyone wanted him out of toronto, but they weren't saying he should never play in the nhl again

but honestly the biggest difference was that the things they were saying about willy weren't exactly wrong either. like they would get mad at his lack of production or sloppy defense or careless plays, which like, yeah. that's exactly what was happening. they didn't have to go on and on about it but he wasn't producing like they thought he would and that was that.

And the thing I can't really pinpoint is when and why the nylander hate train stopped. again, I don't think anyone's faults deserve to be pointed out and dissected on a nightly basis, but he hasn't exactly improved exponentially in any of those categories? maybe the caring about toronto bit? but he still makes careless plays and his career point totals are still less than marner/matthews so? what gives?

I don't know why the blame was shifted to mitch, and again, another guy has to take ALL the blame for this teams shortcomings and have his character be questioned every single day. Nothing about it makes sense.

oh yeah and i'm not making light of the types of xenophobia that can be seen when talking about nhlers. there's plenty of it and i'm not even saying willy wasn't a negative talking point bc i'm sure he was. don cherry is an old ass hag whose opinion shouldn't matter at all 50 years after he stopped playing like jfc. but i do think one man's vendetta and constant bitching is different from like.. proper media outlets going out of their way to misinterpret something (or EVERYTHING) a player says time and time again to drum up talk. i just think things on the internet have somehow gotten worse in terms of clickbait so everything feels even more terrible too. someone does always have to be the scapegoat with toronto but i have a hard time buying that a rookie was taking up as much air time as the public punching bag than a now star player who has an obligation and routine to be in the media more often and all of it follows constant playoff failure from the TEAM. even elliott friedman covering the entire LEAGUE having to stop talking about anything to do with mitch hypothetically unless it was actual insider info bc his mentions went nuts is so........ trash.

and lol about the stuff they were saying about willy. it certainly isn't a nice way to say it... calling him lazy and insinuating shit about his work ethic is attacking his character when i don't think that's the way to put it, but i do think those are still problems in his game, you're right! the thing is... willy was not always productive as he has been right now, lol. his game has grown but mostly in just offensive production and that's it. he hasn't put in the work on the less flashy side of things (while mitch has. mitch's offense has always been top tier but he's dedicated time to growing defensively clearly) and i think it's a valid criticism of him and also a lot of hockey fans don't fully know how to evaluate or value skills away from the puck (myself included to some extent too, it's harder). he's great at creating offense solo... he's a great puck carrier and in transition... he's great when he's out there with a loaded up line like the power play (hence why some of his 'clutch' moments come in those situations too). but i also think everyone talking about his ability to pay attention for a full 82 game span being unproven is right, lol. i saw a tweet abt how he does 'just enough' the other day and was a 'load management king' and like. maybe so but imagine if a forward you've agreed to pay 11.5 would do a little more than that and work on consistency, lol. i get why people are a fan of his game, don't get me wrong. it's fun to watch graceful bursts of offense... i just think there's still irresponsibility there. if he were more willing to buy in, we have a better shot at racking up more points during the regular season and putting us in a better position for the playoffs too... wouldn't need some of those moments of saving lol. it's not just about only 'showing up' in the playoffs moments considered big, which i still think is a stupid argument when every game is important and the best playoff run by a current leaf was 22-23 mitch but. idk. i'm kind of glad berube is trying him at center to give the leafs and willy's game some versatility. i hope it comes with growth, the team will be better for it.

the shift in blame is hard to pinpoint for me too, lol. i don't get why beyond like.. willy bulking up... putting up 40 goals? idk what the threshold is for why things changed this time when mitch was our mvp 2 yrs ago with auston hurt. willy going on a run in a contract year was part of it probably, but it's silly of leaf fans to just decide Now is the year it all just doesn't work just bc only 2/4 core guys are signed on and then declare those are the best 2 we've had the the loss of the others is marginal. bc lol and it's pure coincidence that the major contracts line up in tandem like that. we still only saw them all play under 2 coaches that whole time... anyway. i have no clue what's next, lol. i'm excited to see them play in a different system for real, but i think the dumbest people among us need someone to solely blame for why everything up to this point hasn't worked and why getting rid of that 1 person will result in immediate success while refusing to acknowledge luck plays any sort of role year after year. it's not a fun truth but it's a truth... having 3/4 of ur best players dealing with something in some capacity is crazy work by the universe.

[literaticat]

Question re the ask regarding the author who got the edit letter. While I know an edit letter is common, if it requires such huge changes wouldn’t the publisher have mentioned that at the offer stage or given some indication they’d require lots of changes? Can an author ever pull out at this stage? I imagine most don’t and knuckle down and do the edits but if it’s a really major edit or full rewrite wouldn’t the author have grounds to end the deal if this wasn’t indicated before signing?

My apologies, I think a couple of you may have read the ask from yesterday and felt like I was saying something a little different from what I was trying to say. That's on me! Maybe I made it sound too dramatic! (But it clearly does FEEL dramatic to OP, and to the authors I'm talking about who have said these exact words to me in the past.)

My point was just, yes, it IS totally normal to feel overwhelmed/freaked out by an edit letter when you first get it, and for the auto-reaction to be either "omg they hate this book" or "I can't do this" or "they are wrong" or etc etc.

You'll note, though, that I didn't actually say that the edits they are being asked for are anything close to "a total rewrite" or "such huge changes". More that it often FEELS that way to the author when they first get the letter. You've been waiting for this letter for perhaps months and months. You're already a little intimidated by your editor even if they are the nicest ever. Finally, a 10-page edit letter lands in your inbox.

Gut reaction: AHHHH THEY HATE IT! Because what the author SEES at a glance is a big ol 10 page document full of criticism -- but when the author takes a deep breath and looks at it properly with an unscrambled brain, they will see that it is in fact five pages of praise, and five pages of questions and suggestions.

Edit letters are not generally dictatorial, like "you must change XYZ and totally rewrite this" -- it's much more likely to be something like "I'm loving this scene, but I'm just not sure why so-and-so makes this choice here, it kind of seems to come out of nowhere -- can you clarify?" -- it's things to think about. Maybe it's resolved by something as simple as adding a line of dialogue from that character or another. Maybe it's something that needs to be woven into his backstory, like, you as an author KNOW why he made that choice, it's because of the bike accident he had when he was ten, but that isn't on the page, so maybe you add a flashback in a different chapter to resolve this question. OR -- maybe you just leave it a mystery. Like, it's your book, there's very little you HAVE to change if you really disagree.

This is hard work, not because you are rewriting a book from the ground up or something - - this is not demolition derby time -- it's actually the opposite of that. It's hard work because it's thoughtful and careful. You are getting to look at the book through somebody else's eyes (somebody who probably has a LOT of expertise about story and who has distance that you are too close to the work to have) -- somebody who is, in fact, trying to take what you already have and make it the best it can be, NOT destroy it. That's valuable! You don't have to make every change or address every question they ask, but you probably SHOULD at least THINK about all of them -- because if they have a problem understanding XYZ, it's quite likely a regular reader will, too. (I talk more about this in some of the Revision posts in the FAQ).

That's why IMO when you get an edit letter by all means look at it -- BUT THEN STEP AWAY FROM IT. You don't want to knee-jerk reaction this. Take your time, think about it, and then when you approach it again, look at what it is actually saying and asking you to do, and take it bird by bird.

If it requires such huge changes wouldn’t the publisher have mentioned that at the offer stage or given some indication they’d require lots of changes? Yep -- if they really did want a total rewrite or just A BIG EDIT that might take it the book in a very different direction from what you intended -- they would have said so at the offer stage and it would be a point of discussion. If you indicated you really were not in agreement with that, they probably wouldn't have offered at all.

Can an author ever pull out at this stage? I mean I guess they can if they want, but a) again, the editor probs would have said so ahead of time if it was really THAT major a rewrite, b) if you are going to break contracts just because you don't want to revise, that's not a great look and probably doesn't bode well for getting future contracts. I would just, you know, take a beat before returning the money and breaking the contract. That's a nuclear option, last-resort kind of thing to do -- conversations should probably happen before you go there!

[caladamn]

I'm not even gonna venture onto DR twitter rn cause I know the Plane hate will piss me off. Like... I completely understand not liking what she said or agreeing with it! But it pisses me off when people call someone racist, misogynistic, homophobic, transphobic (you get the idea) for no reason when whatever they said just doesn't warrant that reaction?? I don't know much about Chappell and I'm sure she's a lovely woman, and PJ deffo (just for her own sake tbh) shouldn't have posted that cause, well... we now know how people react and she probs should have just sat in silence with it for a while longer (also idk if i'm not understanding fully, but did pj say she's heard some drag queens say that chappell is rude or did that not happen? cause i've only seen one screenshot of plane talking about it, but some are saying that PJ said that other drag queens have had been interactions with Chappell) ANYWAY, sorry for this ask - you don't have to answer it cause its so messy and all over the place lmao but it genuinely rubs me the wrong way... I think most of the people getting super angry over what she said are people that don't like pj, haven't from the start, and just kinda followed along with the overall fanbase when they started opening up to her, and they've been waiting for something to set them off (cause i remember people being set off during the lip sync smackdown episode when pj joked about amanda and quite a few people started calling her a bully again on twitter) i think everyone should just take a deep breath like i understand why people are mad or annoyed but it's the people REALLY going in on her that are pissing me all the way off like... fucking relax you're acting like she said something horrific

i 100% agree anon !

at first I was mostly annoyed by the fact that people just blew everything completely out of proportion (imo-- cause I really don't understand how "I don't vibe with this person" becomes "I think this person and everyone similar to this person is not valid"- ???). but then they started calling pj things that she's clearly not (there's multiple videos of her saying she loves women and lesbians, hello?). and I somewhat understand why seeing someone who's a white cis gay man being skeptical of a lesbian artist feeds into the narrative of gay men excluding queer women from queer spaces--- but that's literally not what pj did. and you're right, she did mention that she heard from local queens that had worked with chappell in the past that she wasn't the nicest (not sure how true this is, but if that's what she heard who am i, or anyone, to deny that).

and the worst part is that now they're using this to bring up past FALSE allegations against her. it's pretty obvious atp that these people don't actually care to defend the reason this whole discourse started for, they just want pj cancelled and gone. I've literally seen people just go on and on about how shitty of a person (they think) she is instead of defending lesbians or queer women who do drag. they don't care about queer women.

also, everyone's entitled to an opinion (!). all pj did was give her (albeit uninformed/incorrect) opinion/criticism on chappell. she never talked about lesbians as a whole. and even if she did. WHO CARES. there's more important things in the world and a person's opinion is not going to change anything or have any true impact on anyone's life. this is such stupid discourse imo.

[blooming-violets]

I don't want you to think I'm critical of dancing on her own OK maybe I am but I'm not here to .....make your day worse just give my own two cents I'm glad that peter gets therapy and I'm glad you mention peter is extremely young during all of this it makes me a little bit more empathetic to see his side of the matter and while it's wonderful that our lady character is capable to forgive him despite all this shit he put her through I still don't think she should be romantically involved with him like ever it not that he doesn't deserve her and bla bla (though that is also a very valid point) it not healthy for either of them she has seen him as an escape from her abusive childhood and clung on to the one thing she sees as normal it's quite similar for him to keep her with him because of his abandonment issues maybe there is quite strong love there but is it strong enough to take away the fact that they both view each other as coping mechanisms ? Im also much more optimistic and I like to think if anyone was in th place of the oc would've cut out peter along time ago which is what I wanted for them to go on healing parts separately from one another and find themselves and each other along the way again that's what is my hc for this actually that she views Gabe as the last starw forces him to move out And gets the fuck away from this man whose cut her of from so fucking much just cause he can't stand to have someone else in her life that's so so shitty but then I'm not her I don't even know how I would react if I was put in this situation humans are so weird in this way we are all wired differently while we like to think we want to do something some way we might do the opposite I guess I'm one of those people who like the "but this is the right way to go about things" ending rather than gray ending that don't satisfy me but that's my problem maybe that's what makes this fic so good for me it forces me to confront how I feel about morally Gray characters and complex situations rather than conforming to this good Black and white ending we have something Strange though it is also happy ending just not the one I agree with so yeah....the point of all this is youre a great writer thanks for writing this and I hope peter gets all the therapy he can lives with knowing that he's a very very lucky man cause I would've kicked him out a long time ago. I'm going to go ahead of believing that they never ended up together romantically

Hahaha this made me chuckle because I thought I was bad at rambling, run-on sentences with zero punctuation but I think you have me beat! I need to go reread this line by line because it's so much and I love it. And I'm glad you have your own opinions on it! That's what makes writing fun to me is seeing everyone's different takes and sides and who identifies best with what part. I love discussing my work and other people's work that I love in detail. Sometimes I think too many people just throw out a "this was good!" and then bounce. I want to talk about stuff and hear people's deeper thoughts. Esp for a fic like this, I knew it would potentially be divisive.

When I write, the characters sort of are their own people and I'm just their puppet for them to put their stories on the page. I don't know how else to describe it but I have such a clear picture of who they are, what they do, and why they're doing it that they become their own little entity chillin up in my brain. So when I write, I can say "How would x react to y?" And then they sort of take over from there.

For this particular story, I had two very broken, traumatized people. You hit it perfect by saying they were each other's coping mechanism. She has literally never had another friend in her entire life besides Peter. That is not healthy! None of this relationship is healthy. It starts off with Peter protecting her from bullies, the first and only person in her life to ever stand up for her, so she basically imprints on him as her savior. She views him through rose colored glasses. Even when he's horrible to her, when she looks at him, she only sees that scrappy little boy from the first grade beating her bullies with a stick. She can't separate that image of Peter from the man he's grown up to be.

Peter, on the other hand, is so psychologically broken that he's just as bad (actually, he's worse). He's torn between wanting to always save her but not being able to know how/being too scared of failing/her actually not needing him. He doesn't know how to navigate being a super hero and the deaths that come with that and how to keep up healthy relations. You are absolutely right when you say it's not healthy! It's very much not. His depression also lead him down the path of becoming hardened, bitter, and mean. He emotions are frozen up still.

What's funny is that I don't actually view the ending as happy. It feels almost bittersweet to me. She had been waiting her whole life for Peter to love her how she wants. This is the first time he's expressed that out loud to her. She's been waiting for that kiss for so long that I don't think anything else mattered to her in that moment. She's blinded by her childhood dreams. Peter is blinded by his fear of losing her.

Technically this isn't the "end" also. I mean, it's the end of me writing the story but they would still live on in the fictional universe. I do think that she would lose her virginity to him eventually and I do think he would be really sweet about it. But as for them working out long term, I really don't know. The thing about therapy is that it slowly unveils stuff about yourself that you didn't realize over time. (I also don't think a therapist would encourage this relationship, both hers and his, I think they would tell them to hold off on it). I doubt they will listen, though, because I know these characters. They are going to try before they are ready. They are going to try to force things and I don't exactly see the best outcome for them.

For the ending, it's not exactly happy or a finality of what they will be. It's meant to be hopeful and nudged into the direction of healing but that's where it ends.

The rest is to up to you, my love! Envision their messy attempts at a relationship to fail. Envision her striking up a conversation with Gabe a year into the future and him inviting out to movie. Technically anything that happens after they go back home is up to the reader! It's out of my hands!

Final points because I've rambled far too long, the story wasn't meant to be about what is right but what would happen if you put two messy, traumatized humans together and forced them into different situations. They wouldn't make the right choices because they've never been taught anything different. All she's ever known is Peter so, therefore, all she's ever going to chose is Peter...until she works on that in therapy and, hopefully, finds her own self again and learns how to live without her crutch. For now, they recognize their love for the other, whatever form that takes and, for now, that will have to do because they don't know any other way of living. Bittersweet! Not happy.

Thank you for this ask though. It made me happy that someone could even care enough to feel anger on behalf of a character I wrote and want justice for them. All I want is for people to love the creatures in my head as much as I do.

[ram-de]

[read] extraordinaries

gosh it's been a long time since i put my random commentaries afetr i read a book. i read a lot but i haven't been putting it in words like these. i think it's a nice way to take a breather and appreciate the story for a bit. though i'm itching to read and jump to another one. alright. let's jump in.

the extraordinaries by t.j. klune is the second book i read of his! the first being the house by the cerulean sea. and i wept for that one. it's achingly sweet. and cute. and also hits hard a bit. i should reread it soon. now this one... this one features the main cast being highschoolers. and damn i didn't know I NEED IT SO BAD... LOOK... a lot of romances i read before features teenagers that acts way too mature and also quite high in steam (aka they can't keep it in their pants for 5 minutes) and i. it's not that it's bad. it's just... you know after a while of reading several books, i kind of tend to notice the pattern of like, the tropes, and like, the prose, and um. basically at some point it loses it charms and i ended up groaning, "not again..." or "i felt like i have read this storyline 32 times this month..." NOT THAT IT'S BAD OF COURSE... i eat it when i'm hungry. when i'm full i just need to take a breathe.

and man. NICK...!!! having the book centered around nick is so, so, good. a peek to his ever-flowing racing mind and how he's just, being him, as a whole. and this guy is a... a fanfic writer. and the love interest being his beta reader... I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS CRACKS ME UP... the dynamics is so good though i felt like they can feel a bit one-dimensional sometimes. i don't know why i'm criticizing. i don't know shit about stories 101 lmao. alright. nick is also very straightforward and cannot lie for good. the way he rambles about everything is adorable (i see u seth...) he puts his mind to it and pushes through everything. i love my delusional son akjsdgashda

THE HUMOR... very up to my alley.

"Nicky, no!" "Nicky, yes!"

AND THE CROWD (me) CHEERS... that sums the whole book actually. nicky got an idea, everybody told him no, and he did it anyway. sdhgfadskhaskjh. or this one passage. context being the dad is injured and was advised not to talk, and nick asked him how his day and glared at him. it's funny to me!!

and this one i have sorta expects from the author. it's how heartfelt the story can be at times. t.j. klune is poignant with his words. the story touches grief very delicately, how it impacts the whole family and their relations to another. there's this one part where nick have hard time breathing the moment his dad said he's gonna take his phone. his dad grounds him, distanced him from his friends, cutting of internet and all other things. but the one thing that was about to break him is the fact that he would have his phone taken away, due to the thoughts that if something happened (to his dad), then he wouldn't know. like how it happened with his mom. AND... :-( ... that's why it also hurts so bad when the two get caught arguing and his dad ended up telling nick why he is the way that he is.. :"""" I'M SO WEAK WITH FAMILY STORYLINES... they're always the one that made me teared up...

one thing i did not like is the blue-balling of important revelations that's like kinda obvious but they kept pushing it back. "oh, nick, don't you know? he's actually..." and suddenly the door opens. [plot ignored for several pages]. "i can't keep it anymore. i'm gonna tell you. actually..." and then suddenly a bomb exploded or something. LIKE... the fact that i'm writing it down means i'm annoyed by it lol since i don't actually notice these stuff usually. also i think the book kind of drags down by the end. i don't really hooked enough for shadow stars storyline. maybe another thing i didn't like is that it have real person shipping... though it's mentioned and implied a lot of how unhealthy that is lol, i can chalk it up to nick being a delulu y/n fanfic author.

it's been a while since i consumed any superhero-related media. i used to be into marvel movies but then they kinda... i don't know. lame. i watched ms. marvel and i liked it. i tried to watch she-hulk but i forgot it exists by the time episode 4? happened and i haven't finished it since. i also despised secret invasion's intro enough to never watch it. ever. i need to watch spiderverse....

why am i getting distracted. OKAY... the thing is. i loved the book. i enjoyed reading the book. i took my time reading it, and the character still lives in my head for now. and because this is a superhero-setting... i ignored any normal haircolor depiction in my head and instead put wacky colorful hairtones for every character anime style. nick? shiny silver (with a stupid ahoge). owen? fiery red (subversion, this is so good). gibby? deep purple. jazz? pink and yellow ombre. seth... black.., because subversion, uh... (he gets his colors from his ties and knots instead)

uh... what i want to say is it's lighthearted! it can be sweet and poignant at times. it's an enjoyable read. mr. t.j.klune good :) i'll put more thoughts if i remember

Edit 5 minutes later.

IT'S A SERIES??!?!?!??!? I thought that last part was the story being cheeky and a references to how superhero movies do post-credits scenes teasing future reveals. there's TWO MORE...!?!??!?!

[destinyc1020]

I have to disagree with that anon about defending the critics. I get their overall point that of course applies to most journalists, but quite a few with TCR were downright nasty. Calling it an 'overlong sob story' absolutely implies a total lack of empathy in the writer. As someone who deals with mental illness, a disorder that is not DID but that is similarly trauma based, the reviews slamming it (which, again, were not the majority - I think out of the ones I read there were about 5 that were unfortunately snarky instead of thoughtful) were borderline ableist to me in the way they approached their critiques. I could tell that those critics not only did not have experience with mental illness, but that they lacked empathy as well. It is just a huge, huge bummer to see modern film and tv criticism turn into a battle over who can create the most scathing headline, it disrespects the hard work done by people who come together to make art.

I'm so glad Akiva did that interview. For my part, it made me feel a lot less alone. The whole show did. It was well made and well acted, the production design was on point, I think the writing was compelling too. Even with the flaws, I don't think it remotely deserved those handful of critics trying so hard to tear it apart. I'm so glad that it seems to have found success in audiences - and I honestly worry about RT scores not just for this project, but for all. I don't think RT is a great method to determine if something is watchable or not. I loved Martin Scorcese's take on RottenTomatoes and other aggregate sites. He went in pretty hard and called them a disgusting spectacle, and lol while I wouldn't be that hyperbolic, I think he has a point! Scores and numbers should not dictate the value of a show or film. I kind of wish we could get rid of the scoring system and just rely on actually reading critic articles instead - I think that would encourage people to think more critically and also to think more for themselves.

Also just want to say I love your blog Destiny! You always have such a great and balanced view of things and it's just appreciated in this fandom

First of all Anon, I'm so sorry that you went through whatever trauma that you've endured, and I hope you are getting any help that you need for any mental/emotional struggles that you go through. 🥰❤️

As you know, that's something that touches me deeply, so I do hope that my followers are doing well, and taking good care of themselves, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, etc. 😊

Anyway, I can see how someone who has the background that you have could view the reviews for TCR as a bit harsh and unsympathetic...maybe downright apathetic even.

I agree that sometimes SOME critics may forget that real people deal with these issues that are being depicted in these films that they watch. Honestly? I think when you watch as many films/TV shows that they have to watch and critique, I think it can sometimes make you a bit calloused and it just becomes a bit of a "job". Unless something really grabs you and your attention from jump, it might become a bit redundant watching film after film, project after project. Don't forget too that some of the critics were more so taking out their anger and frustration at Akiva and the "rules" that were set forth w/regards to not mentioning DID at all in their reviews. To their defense, it IS a bit hard to write a review for TCR WITHOUT mentioning the fact that Danny is suffering from DID. Nearly MOST of the series is Danny talking to his therapist, and trying to pretend that the series isn't about helping a person with DID come to the realization of his past and his condition is kind of challenging, ngl. It still doesn't make the reviews any less hurtful though, so I get it.

At this point, I just think that as long as you (the viewer) enjoyed the series, that's all that really matters at the end of the day. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Also just want to say I love your blog Destiny! You always have such a great and balanced view of things and it's just appreciated in this fandom

Aww...thanks sis. ❤️

[rookie-critic]

City of Angels (1998, dir. Brad Silberling) - review by Rookie-Critic

The third stop on my Nicolas Cage weekly movie nights was an odd choice. After two absolutely unhinged films like Con Air and Face/Off, why would my friends' next choice be a rom-com between Cage and Meg Ryan that happens to be a remake of a beloved 80s film by auteur Wim Wenders? The answer was simple: The song "Iris" by The Goo Goo Dolls was written for this movie, and that was intriguing enough to give it a slot, and honestly I'm the kind of person who wants to devour an actor's entire filmography, especially for an actor like Nicolas Cage, so I didn't mind at all. I didn't have super high expectations going into this one, I'd never even heard of it before and, looking at the reviews, they didn't seem too favorable. However, I was pleasantly surprised by how well written, well acted, and just generally well made this was.

Cage and Ryan both give absolutely stellar performances, with Cage actually managing to draw a tear out of me with a line delivered towards the end of the film. Special shout out should also go to Dennis Franz, who is unforgettable as Nathaniel Messinger in the film. While the story may seem a tad ridiculous on the surface; an angel wants to become mortal after falling in love with a human woman, the film does a very good job of bringing that frankly wacky premise down to Earth and making it believable within the rules the movie sets up for itself. I know I've already mentioned that Cage gives a stellar performance in this, but I don't think I've really sold it enough, so I'm going to keep talking about it. This isn't Cage unhinged, this is Cage subdued. It's such a straight-laced, non-bombastic performance that I'm not sure I've ever seen out of him before. Even taking Pig into account, which by all metrics is a more subdued performance from his average outing, still has aspects to it that are wacky, and only one scene in this entire film sees Cage approaching his normal levels of insanity, but even then it fits within the confines of the character. I know that a lot of the charm surrounding Nicolas Cage is his crazed, frantic acting, but when I see him in films like this, like Pig, it makes me a little sad, because I know that he's more than capable of giving a truly incredible performance. One that's memorable for how good his acting is as opposed to how bizarre and bonkers it is, which, again, has its own charm and appeal. I don't necessarily want Cage's reputation as a wildman actor to go away, I don't want his legacy to consider how genuinely talented he is, as well.

While I don't understand the Tomatometer's 57% for this film (inversely to how I don't quite understand Face/Off's 92%), there are aspects of it that don't work for me. For one, while the dialogue is amazing, Ryan and Cage have absolutely no chemistry. Cage is definitely not the rom-com scene partner that Tom Hanks is to Ryan, and it shows. It really is their chemistry because, as I stated earlier, their performances are both stellar, but I just got nothing in the romance department out of them. Another lackluster piece of this puzzle is that it does lean over into overly sappy territory more than once, for sure. A lot of the music cues, while the songs themselves are good, were almost too much. One in particular, when Sarah McLachlan's "Angel" plays during a pivotal romance scene, was actually too much. This very possibly could be because of that song's connection to the ASPCA commercials from the mid-2000s, and if that is that case I can't really hold that against the film, but the on-the-nose nature of the song's titular line and the style of music it is was more of a hindrance than a help, as was the case for the scene where "Iris" plays.

One last thing I'll say in the con category is with a specific scene in the film in which we are shown flashes of black-and-white clips that don't really seem pertinent as well as black-and-white versions of things that had happened earlier in the movie. From what I understand, the black-and-white aspect of this is in reference to original Wim Wenders film, Wings of Desire, in which it is a major plot point that angels can't see color, which is all well and good except for the fact that this had never been established in City of Angels up to that point, which makes it very jarring and confusing as to why that was been presented that way. It also still doesn't answer what those other, unrelated clips were. The closest thing I think for them to be are shots from Wings of Desire that were placed there as a way to homage the original film, but I have no idea if that's true or not, and it still wouldn't make sense as to how they relate to Seth in this film. Regardless, City of Angels was great. It's one of the better genuinely fantastic performances I've seen out of Cage, the writing was awesome despite its leads' lack of chemistry, and most importantly, I had a fun time watching this with friends. What more can you ask for?

Score: 8/10

Currently available for rent/purchase on digital (iTunes, Amazon, Vudu, etc.) and on DVD & Blu-ray through Warner Bros./Regency.

[owl-deer]

I quit somewhere in the middle five years ago and thanks to tumblr sexyman I'm alight with passion again, so I started re-listening. But, like, I'm 5 years older and a lit BA, so.

Cecil is doing a lot of wonderful "I will mention it without mentioning it" wodoo, and some of it is pretty obvious but some is absolutely subtle. Like, because wtnv is absurd and surreal I've taken things he said in the face value, not realising that him narrating stuff EXACTLY AS IT HAPPENS, including slang and accents, is a critique. Why? Because sometimes he chooses not to, and paraphrases. So the choice of direct narration makes a situation an outlier, its wrongness obvious.

Like this one:

The City Council would like to remind you about the tiered heavens, and the hierarchy of angels. The reminder is that you still should not know anything about this. The structure of heaven and the angelic organizational chart are still privileged information. Also, angels aren’t real. “I really get tired of having to say this,” a City Council representative said to a group of disgruntled angels. “Angels aren’t real. They just aren’t.” The angels became unruly and were dispersed by a thunderclap from heaven.

It's ep. 25 and hearing it would make it even more obvious. Cecil here:

Broke the reminder into two, creating an obvious conflict in meaning of "reminder" and ""not know", and literally reminding us about it first. Instead of, I dunno, saying "The City Council reminds you that there's nothing to know about heavens", which would be Night Valean enough.

Repeated word to word what council said in front of angels (while mimicking, or subtly mocking I would argue, their tone and prononciation), making sure we know the quote and the context around it

Called said non-existing angels angels, admitting their existence

Gave us a bit of information about the hierarchy of angels and tiered heaven we shouldn't know about in the last sentence.

If you have remaining doubts, add to this his general affection for The Old Woman Josie and the way he talks about his convos with her to compare.

He is giving us everything that can be observed, but purposefully not being explicitly critical, instead exploiting any subtle way the language can give him to comment without commenting. He welcomes his listeners, who are the whole town, to scrutinize what is already there, not by sharing his opinion but by what and how he decides not to omit in his narration.

(and he is an unreliable narrator, he says it himself - in the same subtle way, but also directly - which makes the whole thing 10 times more amazing tbh)

So yeah, for big stuff he'll go all in, whatever the risks, we all know that. But he's using every loophole available even for minor shit on everyday basis, and his brutally direct narration is his main tool I think. He's getting away with as much as he can without being taken off of air and/or dissapeared - by just not omitting or paraphrasing stuff, and framing narration in opposition between what is required of him and what actually happens.

And that's just a tip of the iceberg.

IMO half of Nigh Vale absurdity comes from Cecil trying to be a good journalist in a police state.

I'm gonna say it! The thing that made me grumpiest about wtnv fandom back in the day was the belief that Cecil buys into the propaganda! He does NOT! This man is looking you dead in the eyes and saying "do not look at the mountains. The government denies ALL EXISTENCE of such mountains. The mountains are not real." You think he gets sent to re-education every six weeks for FUN?! He is a journalist frantically trying to get around censorship! The government would like to strangle him for talking about this! COME ON!

[missellafitz]

More Theories

So, I have been reading Tony O's book on Frank, and he has a few references in it about Ella, particularly a mention that, while Frank preferred to go out to dinner, he would also, occasionally go to Dean Martin's house or Ella's house. And it hit me just this morning (while I should be doing research for work, haha). There are some real facts about this tidbit.

Ella did not cook. She loved reading cookbooks, but she didn't cook at all (outside of a small mention she made in an interview about cooking for her nieces and calling them "guinea pigs" for her experiment). Ella did have her maid cook though, so there's that.

Ella was RARELY home. She worked 48 weeks out of the year. She was only really home during the holidays, which leads me to...

Frank and Ella would've had to plan these "dinners" because, like I said, she was rarely home in Beverly Hills. Meaning, they talked enough to make plans--and those plans would happen when she was home. (Frank worked a ton too, but he was his own manager, so he had more leeway).

I'm gonna just say I think this is one of the times they'd hook up.

Also, I noticed something else about Ella. I've seen her interactions with Benny Goodman, Danny Kaye, Dean Martin, Bing, and every other man. She's typically shy, humble, a bit giggly, and quite professional in terms of her craft. With Frank, however, there is an ease that she doesn't have with the others. And by ease, I mean, she is playful. She flirt smiles, and most importantly, she busts his chops. If you watch A Man and His Music II, you will see that she has an uncanny ease with him, like she can be her whole self with him. Also, in some article in the early 80s, she mentioned him, calling him a "little man." I don't remember the context, and I need to get access to the database where I found it, but like, that's not something she'd say about anyone else. And finally, although this is only seen in pictures, she would touch him. Frank's 1959 birthday pic (in which his fiancé was also in the photo), Ella is touching him intimately at his waist. I mean, he touched her quite a bit, too, and if you listen to Jim Blackman's (Ella's friend) with PBS, he specifically stated that she HATED to be touched. And yet...

ALSO, let's not forget that Frank made a point to go to her concerts (and she his, but again, as the years went on, she worked constantly). In 1958, he made a point to stop in NYC just to see her show before heading home for Nancy's graduation. There was also an interview where Ella said something along the lines of "Frank used to request that song whenever he came into Basin Street East." I don't remember the song, but I know they saw each other on a pretty consistent basis--and if not seeing each other, they talked pretty consistently. Which brings me to...

1966. Why the hell did he say that shit about her in Life Magazine? And why did she take it see deeply personal? I honestly think she was actually upset with him for marrying Mia Farrow. Because I think Keter Betts told a story that Miles Davis was talking big trash about Ella, and she knew about it. But she did her set, blew him away, and he apologized to her. She said something along the lines of, "Mmhmm...yeah, I know," in a, "yeah, shut the hell up, asshole" kind of way. So I mean, it wasn't like she wasn't criticized by other people, but when Frank did it (and let's be honest, I can see what he meant by what he said--basically, it was a backhanded complement) she lost it...or weeks. That doesn't sound right. I think it was, yeah, she was upset that he said something unsavory about her, but also, he said it at the worst time--right when he married that little girl (now old lady lol) when they had a good thing going. Just my theory.

But then of course, they did the show in 1967. And eventually, they did their tours in the early 70s (also where Ella is uncannily at ease with him if you listen to the recordings). So, I mean, what the hell.

[queersandz]

Alright, I've been around here and in and out of fandom for quite a while now, I've been a lurker most of my online life and never engaged much but this morning I woke up with opinions and I'm not even sure that anyone will read this but i had to put it out there for the world to (maybe) see. So, let's get to it and talk about the importance of safe sex in fanfiction.

I used to not think much about the absence of some kind of protection in the majority of fics dealing with sex but as I get older that's becoming more and more of an issue for me when reading and now it can take me right out of a story.

The weird thing is that I'm sure we'd all agree on the importance of safe sex if asked about it so why isn't it more common in fics?

I can already hear people arguing that it's not sexy or that it kills the mood. You know what does kill the mood? STDs. I don't care that your characters are desperate for each other, being safe is more important than getting your dick wet. And I promise that making your characters ask for a condom won't make them spontaneously combust. So unless your characters live in a universe where STDs don't exist, the matter should be brought up. Unless your characters are in a steady relationship and got tested before ditching protection, the matter should be brought up. And if you're making your characters behave dangerously on purpose it should be said explicitly, don't let people believe that protection is not important. It's not shameful to want to be safe! Sure it can be a bit embarrassing to talk about it but it'll take a minute. And it can't be more embarrassing than having your private bits out and being vulnerable in front of someone else, even more so if it's someone you barely know!

And since I digress let me add that it also applies to oral sex. You don't have to put your dick and/or your mouth on anything to actually have sex AND to have a good time. People have hands, they're right there for us to use! And you really want to put something in a hole? You have something great that's on you all the time - fingers.

Alright, back to the point.

Why am I making such a big deal out of this? Because I can hear other people arguing - it's fiction, people know it's not real. I wish it were as simple as that but some people will read what you wrote and think that's actually how sex works. You think that's stupid? Right, how many people think porn is a real depiction of sex and takes it as an example? You know the answer is way too much! We all are influenced by what we see in medias. You expect me to believe that we didn't all think that what we saw in movies was how love and sex worked? Please. And do you know how many movies with sex scenes mention safe sex? Not a lot. And that's to not say none. And in a world where sex ed is more and more threatened everyday the representation of a healthy and safe sexuality in fiction is even more important, because at this rate fiction will soon be the only source of information on sex accessible to people. But i digress again.

So yes, I'd go as far as to say that writers, (but this applies to everyone really) have some kind of responsibility here because there will always be some scared queer teenager somewhere that will stumble upon your work and take it at face value and they won't have any other examples available to think critically about it.

You think I'm exaggerating, right? Okay, let's be honest here, I started reading fics when I was fifteen - yes, you read that right, fifteen. I was that lonely and scared queer teenager who stumbled upon some smut by accident with no clue as to what a healthy and safe sex life looked like except for what I'd seen on tv.

Also yes, I totally agree with you that minors should not read your smut just as they should not have access to porn, but they do because teenagers have always found ways to get access to things that were forbidden to them, and they always will. So the only thing we can do is to make sure that we give them good examples.

[boyfhee]

hey! you don't have to post this tbh but this is @ the other anon talking about modi.

I'm not indian at all and thus I don't have a formed opinion of bjp or congress. I will say though that anon's comment struck me as wrong because:

1) there should be nothing wrong with 14 year olds being interested in politics and having an opinion; I say this as someone who is well past that age. 14 year olds can have complex thoughts and beliefs; it is definitely a little difficult as being younger causes children to be more impressionable and can lead to extremism, so be cautious. but there should be nothing wrong with 14 year olds having opinions or expressing those opinions -> the ones who are the future of the country should be the most invested in learning about it.

2) I understand feeling frustrated in regards to "horrible names" but it's not a big deal because political figures should never be put on such a pedestal that they can't be criticized, they actually need to be criticized in order to have fruitful discourse, etc.

3) Is modi not extremely hindu nationalist? He significantly marginalizes any muslim indian population, and in fact is a big supporter of israel & netanyahu, these feel like valid concerns to me. feel free to let me know if any of this is incorrect, but I've seen several credible news sources regarding this? and modi definitely doesn't hide it.

hi ^^ i know u said i dont have to post this but i think i just wanted to clear some things up as well :>

firstly, i do agree that there is nothing wrong with 14 year olds having a political opinion. what i think that anon meant is probably that some people or in this case, kids, follow whatever is posted online about politics. they're free to like a political leader and dislike the other but most of the time, again from what i've seen around me including my experience with my brother and a few of his friends, their reasoning for disliking modi is like ... just because. as in, oh just because this person said so. and i see this a lot. i'm not saying everyone is like this, but what i feel is that the previous anon was particularly talking about those who join the hate train without any idea of what's happening and not actually against the kids having / participating in any kind of political discussion

secondly, i quite literally have no opinion on that one since i haven't actually seen anyone calling modi the said 'horrible names' ( in terms of profanities or other vulgar / sensitive terms ) i just think it's one's own decision how they want to perceive these leaders and how much they idolise them

lastly, yes! he is pro-hindu and he basically rode this hindu-muslim agenda the entire election. and he's playing this two-faced game where in one state, he says he doesn't believe in religious differences while in another state, he says something along the lines of “we can identify these disturbing public elements just by their clothes” which we know is clearly targeted at their way of dressing. and saying all this in a country that has terrible relations with islamic country/ies is not exactly smart because he's basically setting up the people against themselves ( like i've seen people around me talk like all muslims follow the terrorism agenda. even parents tell their kids to be wary of their muslim classmates and not be close to them )

about the genocide— that is also true. india has good relations with israel and even though modi said they're 'neutral' and won't pick a side in this ( which i know is not a choice here ) it's quite clear he's just trying to save his relations with netanyahu while also wanting to be seen as a country that doesn't support genocide / has no stance in this. i haven't seen a single news channel talk about the genocide, not a single indian celebrity aside from a few mentioning it and we definitely don't talk about it as much as we should. i think it's also the public's fault for being silent, but mostly the media for putting it in a way where most of the people would support israel