#i should draw her again... 2023 version

[demphix]

Fuck it we ball: Charif Master Post

So a little while ago I made a Deltarune secret boss based on this dialogue from Rudy in Chapter 1

So I took this design I originally posted on December 24th, 2023 that I wasn't using at all and reworked her to fit the new idea

And here's the first sketch dump I did of her to get my ideas a little more ordered (originally posted June 6th, 2024)

Most of what I could say is already just kinda said in the sketch dump (though I'll admit it is kinda badly organized), but I should say the two defeat quotes near the bottom right aren't too in line with what I wanna do with her now so uhhh Ignore Them. And ignore the original music titles those also got changed

Speaking of the music, after posting that art I started working on her songs and their cover arts for YouTube and Bandlab. (All uploaded on June 11th, 2024)

Edit (August 7th, 2024): THESE ARE BEING REMASTERED. THE NEW VERSIONS WILL BE ADDED BELOW AS THEY ARE FINISHED.

(As stated before these are also on my YouTube channel in a playlist. Here's the link to it: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLWcBEk8qiFhUEMeydinegtXnklzvRqYfg&si=ZzYex2g-dzL-qeDv)

And after all that there was one other sketch dump I've done, which was posted on June 14th, 2024.

Once again, most of the stuff I could say is already in the sketch dump (though there's a lot more joke drawings than the first), but if there are any questions feel free to send an ask my way

Edit (July 15, 2024): I ended up changing Charif's boss arena to something in line with the carnival theming of Spamton and Jevil and designing a main boss for the chapter, so I felt I should add that here.

Another Charif Sketch Dump with a whole Two important things. This was originally posted on July 7th.

Edit (July 29th, 2024): I made an additional theme for Vesper. Felt it should be here too since she's so tied to Charif.

Here have this too since I haven't drawn her much

Edit (August 7th, 2024): I made a plot guide for her! I could've conveyed some things better, but I hope it works for what it is.

Edit (August 17th, 2024): plot guide part 3.

Edit (August 28th, 2024): plot guide part 4: the one where I'm worried I was too mean to her

Edit (September 2nd, 2024): I remastered her themes! All tracks but "PRAYERS & PLEAS" (V2) were posted on September 2nd, with "PRAYERS & PLEAS" (V2) originally being posted August 7th.

You can find a post with all of them here, because I can't fit them all in one post. I may just make a new master post when the cover art is done tbh.

And here's the cover art for PRAYERS & PLEAS V2! I'll add the rest as they're made.

[presiding]

a doctor turned serial killer turned doctor again, an actor who paints, a gang leader, a mining baron, and a vice overseer walk into the room.

oh yeah and they lead karnaca now.

dishonored 2 is my fav game but i think it's mid, story-wise. here's why dh1 works and why dh2's overarching story sorta misses

tl;dr: story integration is critical for gameplay that offers audience payoff, but emily's personal arc from dishonor to honor is inconsistently demonstrated in the story, and is not an interactive part of the gameplay.

essay/long version under cut >

recap: what's dishonored's deal

[skip if you want] dh1 is an underdog story: corvo is an honorable man swept up in the machinations of a callous city, so his canonical ending being 'this child will rule over an empire' isn't about the child's rule but rather about corvo's reputation being restored in a more hopeful city, due to his & the player's rejection of the violent connotations of the tagline 'revenge solves everything.'

similarly, in dh1 DLCs, daud's story arc is that of an anti-hero: a dishonorable man who realises too late he has done irreparable harm. he sees the error of his ways after a single monumental death, and eventually a single life redeems him when he/the player stepped in to circumvent a terrible fate for a child, enabling her to rule unfettered.

daud & corvo come to a satisfying conclusion within the extent of their narrative arcs. it doesn't matter that a child on a throne isn't really a fix for a decaying empire - the player's actions throughout the city of dunwall was what mattered - and these stories could be framed as parables. in that sense, young emily as a ruler is a metaphor for a hopeful future for the city & empire.

dishonored 1 & its DLCs are also great examples of storytelling with perfectly integrated gameplay - you, the player, worked towards the outcome that redeemed the protagonists.

in your efforts to save young emily, you either achieved a good outcome (corvo) or prevented a worse outcome (daud).

bringing us to dh2 -

what's emily's arc

emily's arc is a coming of age: we're introduced to a reigning empress who questions her role & skillset ("am i the empress my mother wanted me to be?"), then her titular fall from grace occurs. from there, she learns to reject the violent, selfish connotations in 'take back whats yours' tagline (a la daud & corvo!) while rediscovering why her rule is critical to the empire.

emily's rule is no longer metaphorical, but:

a literal thing for audience assessment (is emily a good ruler?) AND

the crux of her storyline.

at the beginning of dh2, emily is introduced as a disengaged leader ("i wish i could just run away from all this;" "i dont know if whether i should sail to the opposite side of the world, or have everyone around me executed"). the antihero has a precedent for the dishonored series in daud, so it's not at first glance an issue*, however, the fact that emily has ruled poorly reframes corvo & daud's endings as being less than ideal (a moralistic retcon) *we could talk here about how ready an audience was in 2016 for a flawed women as a protagonist, hell, even in 2023,,,

throwback to the beginning of this essay when i said:

'this child will rule over an empire' isn't about the child's rule but rather about corvo's reputation

emily's story arc, unlike for daud & corvo, is literally about the quality of her rule. we're no longer in metaphor territory (ironic phrase): a parable-style ending doesn't work.

does emily become a good ruler

we know she becomes a good ruler because the game says so. it is narrated to the audience via a (literal) word of god in the space of 30 seconds, after the final boss. the outsider tells us that emily becomes known as Just & Clever.

drawing a distinction here - this narration is not the same as the player actively being involved.

the player does not throughout the game become aware that emily has made political allies. during the game, she doesn't talk to these characters about saving karnaca or being a better ruler to the empire (there's a few lines might imply it, but you need to be actively looking and being careful to wait for every voice line. it's a far cry from daud & corvo's fight to save emily being unmissable - even though daud doesn't know at the beginning that's the goal).

how does the game show it

you can coincidentally not kill most of your subjects and never be aware that emily is looking to restore karnaca by means of instating a council - it's never brought up. it *couldn't* be brought up, because that council serves under the fake duke (armando), who is the last person she speaks to before she leaves for dunwall. its her suggestion that he rules karnaca, but armando's condition is that he will rule as he sees fit.

to back up a bit, emily's canonical method of restoring karnaca is by banding together key allies - hypatia, stilton, [byrne &or paolo], pastor, under a council beneath the duke's body double. they are passionate people who would each individually make worthwhile advisors, but if you think about those characters sitting at a table trying to reach an agreement, it feels like an assortment of people that emily didn't kill along the way and doesn't feel organic (up to interpretation). it's not stated if emily herself banded this council together, but logically she must have (worth a mention these are mostly characters that you as the player had reasonable rationale to kill during a high chaos run, except pastor). the underlying concept may be that karnaca's power is returned to its people - which is interesting given that the monarchy remains and armando's decision is final.

this overarching solution could also be taken as a critique to dh1's 'put your kid on the throne,' which is another reason its worthwhile looking at how emily was shown to be a better leader. obviously my point isn't that her solution was bad given the circumstance, but i mean she has very little agency here in all. if emily was shown to be more controlling as a leader, this could be interpreted as character growth, but that's not the case.

coming of age

how do you learn & grow when you can't specify your failings? emily doesn't really touch on her shortcomings as an empress. she non-specifically worries delilah makes a better empress than her. it's hard to argue her worries are meaningful when someone good at their job will still worry when lives are in the balance.

emily's best 'aha' moments (eg. crack in the slab comment about gaining perspective) are consistently undercut by a conversation with sokolov or meagan afterwards in which she demonstrates she hasn't learned anything (before the grand palace, emily condemns 'toadies sucking up to me' and is reminded by meagan that she's part of the problem). the story is confused about what it's trying to say about emily's progress, and when she's meant to show progress, if she was meant to show any progress at all. it could be argued that emily was never even a bad ruler, she had just been fed misinformation about the problems in karnaca and been the victim of slander by her political enemies. the game doesn't make this clear - it's easier to argue that the opposite is true given that her allies only have criticism.

worth a mention here that the heart quotes about armando - a fake ruler - interestingly mirror emily's character concerns. "see how he sighs? his life is a gilded cage." but this essay is already long.

while corvo & daud spend their games (and through the gameplay) 'earning' their redemption, emily is being led by the NPCs around her to a conclusion and a fix for the political mess in karnaca: meagan & sokolov guide emily to her missions, and there's no recurring quest for emily to investigate possible allies. she is able to gather the people she hasn't killed to herself by manner of... post-game narration. during the game, she's primarily concerned with getting her throne back.

an easy fix: if there had been less dialogue & narrative focus on emily's failings perhaps the ending would have felt more satisfying. it has the feel of cut content, but i don't know what was cut to be able to comment on it.

so what went wrong?

i can't help but wonder if arkane were worried they would lose a certain demographic if corvo wasn't playable (may have been deemed too much of a risk - 2013 was a different time), and so they had to take out story elements that were unique to emily's growth as a character/empress, because the usual storyline/gameplay integration had to work for both characters - in other words, gameplay that made sense for both corvo & emily was prioritised before emily's story & character development. which is a silly problem to have in a game that added character voices for the sake of improving characterisation - maybe emily's tale would have felt more akin to a parable if she had less lines that betrayed her ignorance (to the disdain of those around her).

i wish more care had been taken with emily's story. most players will never really notice the large variety of different endings - they're not particularly satisfying in and of themselves.

it's ironic that one of Emily's complaints is about her father/protector being overbearing, when his (parallel universe) presence in the gameplay may be one of the reasons her own narrative arc falls flat.

what are the upsides here

changing tune from what didn't work - don't you think the concept is fantastic? it's a great idea overall - can you imagine if the coming of age storyline was better integrated into the game?

it's valuable to talk about the integration of story and gameplay and characterisation from a craft perspective. dh2 genuinely is my favourite game - it's beautiful, the imm-sim design philosophy makes the world a delight to explore, the combat gives endless creative options for tackling any fight, there is a far greater diversity of cast in an in-text canonical way. there's loads to love!

i love emily as a dodgy leader, to me it adds interesting dimensionality to the outsider's narrations - of course in dunwall there's never a neat happily ever after! emily, like the outsider, both work well as characters who hold ultimate power but aren't necessarily worthy of it - and this makes perfect sense for the dishonored universe's morality & critiques of power. however, within this grey area there's still plenty of room for a satisfying ending, which isn't what we ended up with, whatever the true reason for that was. and also, damn, emily's a marked assassin empress, if she can't lead well then who can?

while dh1 was criticised for its narrative simplicity, dh2 in contrast and in hindsight shows us that simplicity isn't so bad - there's satisfaction in gameplay achieves a clear, simple narrative goal.

[lazytitans-world]

Wish re watch thoughts

Having not watched Wish since it came out in theaters in November of 2023 and going down the rabbit hole of abandoned concepts and re-writes in the months leading up to Wish dropping on Disney+ I can now give Wish a re watch and share my thoughts on it. Now keep in mind I am coming at this movie from many angles. On one hand, I want to watch this with a new frame of mind to give it a chance to see if any of my thoughts on the movie have changed. On the other side is my inner "WE COULD HAVE HAD A STARBOY!" fandom side of me looking to see if any of the scrapped concepts could have worked in the movie we got and to see if any traces of those concepts were left behind. But no more waitng, no more writing fanfics, its time to re-watch Wish

• Starting off with the classic story book opening I felt was a great touch as it harkens back to classic Disney animated movies like Snow White, Pinnochio and Sword in the Stone.

• So why was Asha being so secretive to her family about her interview for Magnifico's apprenticeship? That feels like something major to tell your family. Even Asha's friends know about it. It could be Asha wanted to surprise them, I guess.

• Hot take: Welcome to Rosas is not that bad of a song, it's got a catchy beat and introduces us to the kingdom, Magnifico, and the wishes.

• The scene where Asha and her friends discuss her interview does have Asha doing typical "quirky Disney girl" behavior but at the same time she is a teen about to have an interview for what may be one of the most sought-after jobs in the kingdom, I'd be acting weird to if I was her age and in her position.

• We get some hints of Magnifico's jerk personality as he somewhat dismisses Asha's drawings when she shows it to him. The line is "Do we call that a talent?"

• Magnifico mentioning how he knew of Asha's father and how her dad talked about the stars is an interesting given how everything turns out but for one, this is NEVER BROUGHT UP AGAIN and two, this feels like a leftover of one of the deleted scenes from Wish where Magnifico wanted to harness a stars power but was never powerful enough to do so.

• Oh "At All Costs", how you sparked a fandom when you had no intention of doing so.

• In context of the movie, At All Costs does work as it shows that Magnifico's and Asha's feelings on the wishes. Magnifico holding on too his past trauma and feeling that HE and only HE can protect these sacred things while Asha is more drawn to the person AND their wishes, notably her Saba's wish.

• Opinion time: If we were to have Starboy and a romance, the demo version of At All Costs should have been a reprise, just with the word love instead of promise, showing how Star and Asha's relationship has grown and deepened. It would be a lot like "I See the Light" from Tangled, taking place before the climax.

• It makes a little sense why Magnifico rejected Asha's application since after singing "At All Costs" he sees her drawn to the Wishes and some even being drawn to her as the wish orbs now have a purple hew instead of blue hew like the color of Magnifico's cape to them to match Asha's dress. Magnifico has worries that someone will use the power for personal, and in his mind "selfish" reasons, plus his trauma from his village being destroyed makes him warry of who to trust.

• So what happens to a person's wish if they die? Does it just disappear?

• So that whole opinion of "Asha wants Magnifico to grant everyone's wish" WRONG! Asha wants Magnifico to give wishes back to those who have given theirs away long ago and let the people pursue their own wishes.

• Magnifico's tease that he might grant Sabino's wish is petty and I like it as he starts by saying a name starting with Sa before saying another person's name. That is petty stuff right there.

•If you are aware of the original concept art and the many changes Wish went through during production, it is obvious that Amaya, Star and Sabino got their characters changed, and in the case of some, completely neutered.

• I like Ariana Deboise and Chris Pine as Asha and Magnifico respectively.

• "This Wish" is ok and is mostly carried by Araina's strong vocal range.

• Star's arrival has where my inner fandom is screaming "honey get ready, you've got a big storm coming"

• "Can light be loving?" according to the many re-writes I've read, yes Asha, yes it can.

• Opinion time, again: I am in favor of the Starboy design seen in the concept art. Letting you know now since from this point on is about Star.

• I can totally see the human design of Star working in the introduction they have with Asha.

• I get why the creative team wanted Star to look that way, they wanted to do something different and that design screams "marketable plush"

• Once Valentino started talking and we go into "You're a Star", it all came back to me, that bad feeling. THIS IS WHAT I DID NOT LIKE ABOUT WISH. This part feels specifically aimed at children or at most feels too "cutesy". This, in my opinion, where people turned on Wish.

• Getting back to the Star Boy design, "You're a Star" could have worked as a way of Star showing off their powers, as well as them crushing on Asha. "You know you're a work of art" - Imagine Star Boy blushing as that is being said while looking at Asha, this writes itself.

• Look, I like Alan Tudyk, he can be funny if given witty and sarcastic dialogue and I know he has been a fixture in Disney movies for a while, but they gave him nothing to work with for this. This is not an obligation, more like a reward gone wrong. I am glad that Alan got a more prominent role, but I just thought it should have been something better.

• Another major criticism I've seen is that Magnifico's down fall is just him being controlled by a book when really it is more complicated than that. I akin it to Anakin Skywalker falling to the dark side as in it's not just the teachings that cause someone to go down the path of darkness, it's the feelings and desires of the one learning. Magnifico, at the point of the movie is paranoid and afraid that someone or something is here to take away his powers, threaten his power status, and destroy his kingdom that he works hard to protect in his own way. So it is not just the book doing it but the powers of the book mixed with his own fear, anger, trauma and other negative emotions that cause him to fall to darkness. Hate leads to anger, anger leads to

fear, fear leads to suffering.

•I totally forgot the Simon actually sees and interacts with Star before his betrayal. Star hands him a heart after he says he has forgotten what we wished for and when I first saw this I thought it meant that he had a crush on someone, maybe Asha but after seeing the movie it was just Star trying to be nice to Simon. Which in turn makes Simon's turn even more strange.

•I understand why people would think Asha was selfish in going for her family's wishes first when freeing them but my head cannon is that freeing all of them at once would be too big of scene and she wants to prove to Sabino that his wish is worth granting. However, Magnifico would notice that some wishes are missing and would put two and two together so this plan was not thought out to much but hey she is only 18 and she just met a magic star that can help her so I think her thinking clearly is not to much of an issue.

• "This is Thanks I Get" starts off odd as no one brought up the mirror thing in the scene where the citizens question Magnifico. But the song itself is to show that though Magnifico shows that he cares about the citizens of Rosas and their safety, he would rather have someone else help them then get involved himself and still wanting praise even though he does not really do much for the kingdom outside of granting wishes. The song also is to show that Magnifico is now going down the path of darkness due to his own insecurities and ego. Chris Pine does a great job with the song as he becomes more unhinged in every chorus.

• THERE IS NO SCENE WHERE SAKINA AND SABINO MEET STAR AND TALKING VALENTINO WTH!!! It jumps right to Asha giving Sabino his wish back, no lead in or setup.

•Then we go right to Magnifico breaking into Asha's house after being told she brought down the star. Again, there was no setup or lead in, it just happened.

•We don't even get to see Asha's mom's wish before Magnifico crushes it. It would have added more to the emotion of the scene to see what her wish was just as Magnifico destroyed it. This also shown to be the first time Magnifico has ever destroyed a wish. I chalk this up to his new powers influencing him to destroy it.

• Sabino mentions as they escape that Asha's father would be disheartened to see what Magnifico has done, implying that the father was a believer of Magnifico.

• Star holding Asha's chin as she blames herself for everything again makes me yearn for the Star Boy design.

• Magnifico having a hidden evil lair beneath his royal study is symbolism 101 but nice to see.

• Fun detail: When Magnifico grants Simon's wish, he uses the spear he made from forbidden magic and that in turns corrupts Simon's wish and thus Simon himself. We see instead of the usual blue, pink or other colors used to represent Magnifico's magic its is now the green evil magic, symbolizing that Simon's wish, though granted, is now corrupted as well.

• Simon turning on his friends is shown more as an effect of the forbidden magic Magnifico used.

• How do you have a wanted poster of Asha and not make a "they got my nose wrong" joke from Tangled.

• "My butt found it" - see this is why a lot of people thought this movie was written by AI.

•"Introverts need sanctuary too" - Hell yeah Bazeema

•"What I Know Now" is another decent song as I am a sucker for drum breaks and enjoy the revolutionary feel behind it.

• Apparently, to avoid corruption by the book of forbidden magic you have to wash your hands with obsidian oil before using the book. So to avoiding evil basically comes down to washing your hands, gee you think this movie was made during a pandemic or something. Overall, pretty lame way to defeat evil.

•The rule is "embrace forbidden magic once and you commit to it for eternity". I find it hard to believe that no one has tried to save someone corrupted by this forbidden magic before this.

• I notice that the more obvious Disney call backs happen at the last third of the movie. Before it was subtle but now it is super obvious.

• If we were not going to get a reprise of "At All Costs" then "This Wish" would make sense as it shows the kingdom getting behind Asha and standing up to Magnifico themselves. It is a decent song for what it needs to be.

•Again, I can't help thinking about Star's human design as they are sucked into Magnifico's staff. Imagine them taking one last glance at Asha before being sucked in to the staff, some good romantic build there.

• Simon's betrayal came down to him wanting to feel whole again after giving up his wish and essentially making a deal with the devil to make that happen. I get that people saw him differently and he would want to change that but how he acted with Asha and the others before Magnifico told the kingdom about the light and its apparent danger still made his turn feel off, we needed to see Simon struggle with how he feels and how others see him for it to make sense.

•So Star did not go back to the sky at the end, which does leave the door open for other adventures with Asha and others. Maybe star could turn human at the end (LOOK LET ME DREAM!)

Overall my thoughts on Wish have not really changed since I first viewed it. The movie is passable, a 6 or seven out of 10, a C+ to B grade. The animation is good, the story is fine and the characters do not bother me too much.

But for a movie that is supposed to represent 100 years of Disney animation, one of the most influential studios of all time, it is not wrong to say that we should have gotten more. This movie is missing one thing, that special sauce to put it over the top. It could've been a romance with a human looking Star, it could have been Amaya and Magnifico being a villainous couple, it could have been anything. Wish just needed that extra something to push past some of the pacing and story beats that drag it down such as the bad jokes and odd pacing. Maybe a better relationship between Asha and Star would be glue that held the movie together as most previous Disney film always had that main duo that kept you interested but Asha and this version of Star just don't click like a Moana and Maui or Anna and Elsa did.

I would give it a recommendation now that it is on streaming for an affordable price plus it does come with the deleted scenes and bonus materials. It's also clear to see that the team behind it was passionate about making this the best it could be and I applaud the team for that idea. I know others are going after them for not going through with certain concepts, but I think they did an okay job with what they had.

So yes I like Wish, it's not my favorite Disney movie but it's one I would not mind watching again and understand if it's someone's favorite. Hopefully the initial negativity towards the movie dies down and people actually give it a chance.

[fairygeek777]

Can you tell us more about your Sailor Earth OC? 👀

Oh my goodness thank you for asking!!! I'm going to be greedy and use this as an info dump, hope that’s okay anon! 🙏

For starters, I should mention that Sailor Earth is a redesign/alternate fandom recycle of my main oc Genevieve Marena. She was originally created in 2018 for the Fairy Tail fandom and started with the name Hoseki Ishi. 

Gene's thing was always diamonds, gems and minerals. So when I became obsessed with- *ahem* I mean, Got into Sailor Moon, I could not resist the urge to draw her as Sailor Earth. I drew her within a month of reading and buying the first 2 volumes LOL. 

This is the art from August 1st 2022

Since then I fell utterly in love with Dream arc, Mamoru and any version of him, Elysion, the Golden Kingdom, Helios’ role as a guardian priest and literally anything related to the Earth as Naoko Takeuchi wrote of it.

I was also low-key upset about how 90s was treating Mamo and Usagi, so I ironically made her the senshi that defends the love of Serenity and Endymion and protects their happiness lol.

Thinking about her more seriously as I am now deeply attached to Sailor Moon, I have a working summary of how I imagine her.

I explored her various designs for the series back in Summer 2023 (again after finishing the manga) 

More recently, I've been brainstorming how to more efficiently include her in the Sailor Moon story. I've been doing light research on Mythology, becoming more familiar with Astrology and crystals. I was honestly struggling quite a bit when it became clear that Earth is almost excluded from Astrology. That is, it's not treated in the same respect as Mercury or Neptune etc. are. 

I also knew that I didn't want to make her a Princess, that would be like replacing Endymion as the heir to the planet. And I was not about to make her the child of NQ Serenity and King Endymion. So I thought I might make her somewhat like Chibi Moon. If there can be two Sailor Moon senshi, then I say, why not two Earth guardians? Then I noticed that Pink Moon is actually the term for April's full moon. So I thought I could do something with that to make my Sailor Earth stand out (since it is obviously a very unoriginal idea in the first place) but I have yet to find a similar thing for Earth. 

Basically Earth is much less interesting than literally any other heavenly body to astronomers and astrologists so I'm working with very little lol. 

Anyway, I decided she'd be an Elysion Priestess and that she was given the powers of a Sailor Senshi to protect the Earth and her prince. She goes to the surface and attends Rei’s school, T.A girls academy. 

More recently, I was watching Eternal for like the 1 millionth time and it has always bugged me that the 2 Maenads look like they are from the Moon.

They look more like Queen Serenity than someone from Earth.

So, no offense to Takeuchi my girl, but imma change that. Because unfortunately I feel like things from Silver Millenium like the Twin bun hair on these two overlap too much with what should be unique to Earth. (But that is a blog for another day, so I digress) The two Maenads are now Gaia and Terra. Gaia becomes Sailor Earth and goes to the surface as Hoseki Jinsei and her Lavender Earth Crystal forms.

See these two? One of ‘em is Gaia.

Also, since it is already shameless enough to make a Sailor Earth self insert, I'm inserting my late cat Flash and his name is Apollo because Moon kitties are from Mau therefore any planet can have one not just Moon senshi. But also cuz I miss the hell out of him and I can't look at Artemis without thinking about him.

As of right now, this is the general concept of my Sailor Earth:

Name: Gaia

Gender: female

Civilian Name: Hoseki Jinsei

Senshi name: Sailor Earth

Sailor Crystal: Lavender Earth Crystal

Family: Terra (sister?/mother?) Helios (brother)

Occupation: Elysion Priestess

Partner: Apollo (white kitty with heterochromia from Mau, Artemis' twin brother)

Again, thank you so much for giving me the chance to info dump :3

[alexologyart]

[WIP] A young Entrapta killing the Last King of the Scorpioni

Is okay to cry for what had been lost, my dear. Tomorrow is a new day, as for today the child you once were had died.

Maybe no the most happy of drawings, but I think is a good one to finish 2023.

Firts of all, I hope you all had a very happy Christmas this year, and I wish an equally Happy New Year!!

This year has been rough for me, I passed my internship with the highest grades in July, and now I am days to finish my thesis finally.

In the past months there has been very little updates from me, no art whatsoever, and I'm ashamed of say, not even commission updates for those who had been due theirs. I apologize profoundly.

At the beginning of 2023 I experienced a back injury that took months to heal, the pain was too much, and still today I feel the reminicent of it. At the same time I've been too exhausted by all the requiriments to finish this big step in my life to become a professional and academic in my field, that I negleted the one thing that brings me the most joy in my life.

I am not good balancing work and life, and this took a toll on me. For the first time in long time, that part of my life that brings joy became a burden, I indentified it as a distraction, and I turned it off completely.

This happened because I'm experiencing a big sense of dread to the prospect of what the future awaits for me, trying to search for summer jobs without avail and feeling disappointed all over, feeling depressed because I feel stuck and not growing as an adult reaching 30, there are a lot of expectations to what I could do after getting my degree, defending my thesis on March will be one of them. And this has taken all my energy and time from creating things I love, to the point I even asked myself what was the point of continuing with it.

Art is one of these things that has been with me for the longest, starting drawing when I learned to hold a pen, even before knowing how to write, but in the past six months, after spending a great time without even sketching, I was afraid I had lost this ability, as my head was on Uni, and my body felt heavy by all the stress I didn't want to even check if I could still draw.

I do, I can still draw, although slowly and always resting. My brain needs to adapt again to what it was after months of not doing so.

Creating this version of Entrapta has been a roller coaster of emotions for me, she helps me to express myself and I love thinking in new ways to draw her, I don't care she is not really an original character, but mostly the deep emotional connection I have with her while writing and drawing her story.

She is strong, she is cunning, she is fierce and intelligent. But even a woman like her has to have moment of vulnerability. And this scene, is a pinpoint moment; killing while losing something of herself, quite literally, not feeling fierce but fragile, in pain, and overwhelmed.

Is something that I have reflected a lot the past months, to realize I am entering a moment in my life I should allow me to feel and not to restrict myself from the things I love, so I will try to take my time facing the situations that scares me and as well trying not to feel overwhelmed and anxious for what is to come.

If you would like to support my artistic journey, you can do so on Patreon and Kofi! I would greatly appreciate it! wish you a Happy New Year!

[ikoarts]

December 2022 Art

back to form a bit this month, i really love a lot of the stuff i drew here x

vvv dates + info under the cut vvv

1 - 01/12/2022 : a young Ru! about 14 i think, i was having thoughts about her childhood and how she'd be in school etc

2-5 - 04/12/2022 : vampires.. hehe... thats all x ,, also more little ru, thought she would have a friend, she doesn't keep up with her into adulthood though, but i think Ru thinks of her a lot. also one of her in another outfit, i think she'd constantly have those claires rave ball earrings in like i did LOL

6, 7, 8 - 05/12/2022 : was thinking of what she'd wear to her school disco, somethin trendy, this would have been 2002, i was alive but not old enough to remember how teens were dressing lmfao, but anyhow i love this outfit, something she'd never wear otherwise, but she tries to fit in a bit.. also another little Toni, shes not emo enough here tho

9, 10 - 07/12/2022 : no idea whats going on here x ,, toni suspects homosexual activity, also was playing around with my Rouxls design again (i still dont know how i should be drawing him)

11, 12 - 08/09/12/2022 : TOLD U, we are at last at my current MTT design :D i love how he looks, so funky...

13, 14 - 10/12/2022 : more MTT, wanted to solidify the design, so drew him in a fun pose, still to this day this is one of my fave drawings. since Toni is, or was, like a genderbent human AU version of MTT, i was thinking of playing with her design to reflect that, i didn't go with it tho, still, it was fun to play around with

15, 16 - 18/12/2022 : idk why i lied like that in my last post LOL, i didnt draw the full digital lammy piece for awhile, but this one is definitely closer to the design i went with for her, think i based the digital one on this drawing too. More teen Toni too! i love this drawing its like the quintessential Her, esp her eye design, im glad i went and revised that, bc i know she had raccoon eyes

17, 18 - 21/12/2022 : another fiddle with my Rouxls design, i don't hate this one tbh.. also tism creature Ru

19-22 - 27/12/2022 : i think i found some random pencils and felt like inking and colouring a drawing, not my fave thing but heres a Ru in colour, the rest of the stuff i did this day i like a lot more. Next is an updated version of my gijinka of Rusty from Little Robots, idk if i ever even posted any of the old art i did for this, but heres her again <3 then just a Ru in the festive spirit, cosy jumper and a mug of somethin, i like this one bc shes just so squinkie......

23 - 31/12/2022 : last of 2022! this was done midnight before NYE itself, idk whats going on but i like it, i was thinking about what designs i could make for acrylic keyrings, and the rest is just random x

now onto 2023..... girl im so tired

[specdrawz]

Your persona is literally just Mel in a different font, ofc you would wanna defend her since you want to seem like what she doing isn't wrong

My sona is Mel in a different font? Really??? Are you suuree?? Let's see, my sonas first design made in 2022, early 2023:

This was a gift for my bf, also the first ever drawing of his sona.

My sona usually bright colors and a scene, neon goth, clowncore, type aesthetic. I made my sona wayy before even know who Mel was/is. So you saying that Spec is just Mel's sona in a different font is frankly just...not true.

I have more drawings/doodles as proof that I made Spec before knowing Mel, but those are all traditional art, of which all my previous sketchbooks are put away and I am not bout to pull them out to prove a point that's not relevant...

but, if I must:

this doodle was created roughly 2-3 days after the previous drawing you've seen; and should I also mention that Spec was originally a male? As at the time, I was TRANSMASC.

I doodled this silly fucker and fell in love, making constant doodles of them, then eventually go on to join Mel's server (not be very active) and create this next drawing (and many doodles afterwards). Officially debuting Spec, the bunny with big ass ears.

To which, yes, some people would begin making comparisons of my sona to Mel's, but I didn't care(and still fucking dont) because I know in my heart that Spec is my own original design! Do I see the similarities? Yes— but again, I do not care. It's pure coincidence and it's honestly just 2 people having same aesthetics. So awful, right? 💀

OMG I should also mention that: SPEC IS NOT MY ONLY SONA. I HAVE...6 OTHERS?? honestly only sona I'd say took A LOT of inspo off of Mel's is LIMESTONE. my goatasus oc/sona:

I have 4 sonas of mine have the same aesthetic, but imo only one (Limestone) took direct inspiration from Mel's..💀. The other 3 are simply just other versions of Spec herself!

As for the rest of this ask, I will ignore it for now. I've stood my place enough. You all know where I stand. I have no need to reply to this type of comment anymore.

[alphys-kissy-cutie]

Alphys Kissy Cutie Masterpost

MAIN STORY

Pages 1-15 / 16-19 / 20-23 / 24-27 / 28-31 / 32-35 / 36-Miku / 40-43 / 44-47

BONUS COMICS

Alphys Quits Her Job

More info below

Glad to see you here! I started planning this comic in July of 2023 due to not wanting my dream comic to be my first comic. This was supposed to be a short story, but... it's not going to be that anymore. I planned too much. I had too many ideas. I got too invested in the characters. Womp womp.

This comic is hand-drawn. This is because OK KO does this too and it looks funny. I color this digitally though, you can't make me buy a million colored pencils or markers. This is also going to be a big learning experience for me to draw things that aren't just characters. Bear with me, alphygoers.

I'll be updating with multiple pages every Sunday! I'm currently experimenting with what time works the best, but right now I'm trying out 12:00 PM MDT.

MAIN CHARACTERS THAT HAVE APPEARED SO FAR

Alphys

Did you know she's in this comic? I sure didn't. This came to me as a surprise. Alphys is a teacher at Toriel's school on the surface (this takes place around a year after Undertale's pacifist route). However, she got hit by a bus and ended up in the setting of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie! Uh oh! How tragic! Isn't that tragic?

Rouxls Kaard

Rouxls was hit by a bus, so he's here too. He suddenly showed up with hopes of teaming up with our nerd emoji of a protagonist. Cool.

Mew Mew Clowder

The leader of the Kissy Cuties. Overly cutesy and outgoing. Reminiscent of Raku-chan from Nyan Neko Sugar Girls.

Natsuko Mischief-Scurry

15-year-old magical squirrel of the Kissy Cuties. They fly around and weild an energy spear. They seem really bitter.

Youmu Mischief-Scurry

Purple-haired rat magical girl with a giant hammer. She's a lot quieter than the other Kissy Cuties and does things of her own accord.

Midori Ostentation

Peacock magical girl with robot limbs and brass knuckles. Outgoing and overall glamorous.

AND NOW, A LITTLE LESS THAN MAIN

Undyne

Undyne's running around jobless on the surface. She's living with Alphys and mooching off of her lmao

Papyrus

He's the one running around with Undyne the majority of the time.

Sans

sans.

Mettaton

The idol everyone craves! He lives in a huge ass mansion now and has made more of a name for himself.

LINKS TO OTHER COOL WEBCOMICS

This is a list of webcomics I've been reading recently or ones that were a big inspiration to my story. You should really check them out. They're great.

Starscale

This is my best friend's WIP comic! We've been developing them side-by-side for a long time now, so they're basically sister comics. The child version of the main character (Zoey) actually appears on page 7 of my comic... Also, the art and character design is really cool and detailed! No pages are out yet, but when they are, they will be at @/starscalecomic

Twin Runes

This comic was a major inspiration for me to make an UTDR comic of my own (I'm worried my masterpost looks too much like theirs lmao). This is an UTDR crossover that's pretty funny and has a really cool art style to boot. You're more likely to know about it than this comic, but on the off-chance you don't, you can read it at @/akanemnon

Forgettable

A comic based on the Papyrus is Gaster theory! The story's really cool, Alphys is there, the art's really great and expressive... it's awesome! Once again, it's very possible you've already seen it, but if not, it's at @/forgettable-au

Gaster's Return

Another fancomic with Alphys and amazing art! It's about Gaster coming back after the pacifist route. Flowey's also really awesome and expressive lol. You can read it at @/gastersreturn

[persona5anotherstory]

Oh hey... it's been a while since I haven't posted that much on this account since I have done the Morgana design for the AU itself, but since it is almost the end of 2023, it's the holidays and I recently started playing Persona 5 Tactica this month and with me thinking... Man I should make more AU designs on the characters again and well, I'm doing it again!

And it's not one, not two... but three character designs I have made for the AU as like a early Christmas present for you guys, so I hope you like my own take on them!

Do note that there are stuff that I might have to change for both the character designs, their codenames and their descriptions too!

Ryuji Sakamoto (Codename: Athlete)

Here's everyones favourite bro character that always likes to say "For Real?!?", which he is the AU swap version of Ann Takamaki, I wanted to keep "some" of the appearance of his original game counterpart, but giving him casual clothing.

Ryuji is a first year in Shujin Academy and is part of the track team, where he has been looking out for his childhood friend, Takeishi since they were kids (Yes, it's the same Takeishi that was seen in one of Ryuji's Confidant event in the game), but after what happened in the incident with Takeishi taking the very same fate like with Shiho in Persona 5, he has decided to join The Phantom Thieves to also help reform society itself!

Sumire Yoshizawa (Codename: Coach)

The character that was introduced in the re-release of Persona 5 in the form of Persona 5 Royal, and will be the AU swap version of Yusuke Kitagawa!

She's both a second year student and a sports coach at Shujin Academy that helps out the different students for sporting activities in the school's gym, Sumire really has been interested on the Phantom Thieves ever since they were being talked about in the school, but the reason for that is because she has requested them through the Phan-site all because of her own father forcing her on getting into fashion instead of sports.

Goro Akechi (Codename: Mysterious)

Now to finally end it off here is by showing off Goro Akechi in the AU itself where I have taken the whole "Detective" thing too seriously for him lol, but he's the AU Swap version of Makoto Niijima.

He's a third year in Shujin Academy and is also the prince detective that everyone has been awing for (especially his own fangirls on different Internet forms), he actually has been cousins with Futaba ever since his mom and Futaba’s mom, Wakaba are in good relations with each other due to them being researchers back when they were college students ages ago.

Akechi is quite suspicious on the whole Phantom Thieves thing since they were being spreaded around like wildfire and has been talked around in school, but after soon finding about his cousin is the leader of The Phantom Thieves after spying on Futaba, he has been wanting to join them is due to him currently on an investigation on a problem that has been going on with a new type of drug that has being secretly shared all around the school from some students.

I wanted to carry elements for Akechi in the AU with stuff like him being based on Naoto Shirogane from Persona 4 and even wanting Akechi in the AU to be inspired by Sam from Sam & Max because I just find it a perfect fit for him in my take in this AU itself.

And that's about it, with next year in 2024 I do plan on wanting to draw the next few characters that I really wanted to try and do, which would be Ren, Yusuke, Makoto and Haru, but maybe I might draw the characters that we're in the Persona 5 spin-offs, and even the Persona Q games too!

So I hope you all have yourselves a Happy Holidays!

[chaos-has-theories]

MARCIA SIBLINGS AU I can't remember how it was in the old version but in the new and improved 2023 version she is the youngest child <3 she has 2 older siblings one sister and one vaguely genderless individual and they r twins <3 they're like 6-7 yrs older than her and both were super supportive of her learning magyk and helped her hide it from their parents. They got found out rlly quickly unfortunately and when marcia was 8 her siblings got into a massive fight w their parents and took her and left. They move into the same room in the ramblings Marcia stays in when she's a Hopeful/apprentice in canon (next to the heaps) and her sister is bffs with silas and marcia thinks silas is So Cool bc he's older and rlly likes magyk. Her siblings try and talk to her abt magyk but they don't rlly care abt it all that much so silas is her Favourite Person right after her magyk teacher at school. Her sister works at the manuscriptorium and her sibling tailors clothes for ppl. Btw. She becomes a Hopeful the same as canon except she's just staying at home she's not dramatically moved out like she did in canon. Right up until silas quits his apprenticeship and eventually she gets the offer and ofc she accepts. But silas quit bc of the draw and the darke week and he told her siblings abt it and so when she comes home with the news they're all like oh well maybe u actually shouldn't do this, maybe u should think abt it. And she takes massive offence and everything escalates and she leaves home to live in the wizard tower and doesn't talk to her siblings again for almost her entire apprenticeship (she sees them a few times and they try and talk and she brushes them off bc she's still upset) and it's when alther+the queen die that they rlly desperately try and get in contact. And this is the major change from canon bc she actually lets them and after they explain why they said what they did and everyone apologises for being kind of shitty, they r once again a family <3 and marcia is not. Having to take on the responsibility of being eow all on her own and actually has time to grieve and process and eventually somewhat heal. And she can't take down the custodian (I am taking what marcia says in magyk v seriously) but she does sort of. Funnel kids out of the ya. Every single kid that is sent to guard the wizard tower ends up disappearing and eventually it's basically known among the kids as a death sentence. Jenna gets found out much sooner bc the custodians were investigating ppl Marcia might be close to/consider trustworthy and its v well known that her sister is besties w silas heap. The guy who has a daughter who looks exactly like every princess ever. And so the events of magyk happen earlier and teeny tiny 412 is outside the tower bc he acted out after losing 409 and he is Terrified. And I'm head empty on exactly what happens but I think he doesn't officially get adopted or apprenticed or anything bc. Even marcia can't justify making a 7 yr old an ExtraOrdinary Apprentice. But he just sort of lives in the wizard tower and marcias siblings homes and the heap room and the palace. Everyone is happy and nothing bad happens the end <3

OUGH OUGH I love this *cries*

families...... overresponsible siblings............ tiny 412.... Marcia Silas hero worship. UGH

[mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune]

Hazformers: Sari Sumdac, KeeKee & Fat Nuggets (2023)

---------------

Credit for Hazformers AU goes to Blitzy-Blitzwing

Credit for Transformers goes to Hasbro & TakaraTomy

Credit for Transformers Animated goes to Sam Register & Matt Youngberg

Credit for Helluva Boss & Hazbin Hotel  goes to Vivienne “Vivziepop” Medrano

------------------------

I decided try drawing Sari in the succubus form again, and even have her in her human form, a butterfly form, and one of the forms with her having flame hair.

don’t know if Sari will make a cameo in Blitzy-Blitzwing’s story “Becoming a Demon” but I like to draw the idea of what I think she could look like in Hazformers.

I think I may have made Fat Nuggets a bit smaller than he should be, he looks like he is a newborn piglet, well I guess it’s fine, and Angel would probably love seeing Fat Nuggets being a small piglet.

Sari is wearing a black leather jacket in this and her outfit is suppose to be a mix of her clothes when she is in her human form and full robot form.

anyway if when I can, I might draw this version of Sari again, I think the leather jacket looks great for her and she could still have her technology empath powers, which I know it has a name for it, I need to look it up whats it called, I know I forgot what it is called...

anyway hope some find Fat Nuggets and KeeKee cute in this drawing.          

[rmegars]

completed on 8/5/2023

character's name is Yuánshǔ (yuanshu's fine) (I don't use the tone mark things out of laziness sometimes lmao)

additional info about her and the drawing below

so this was painful lmao

so basically I was working on a request for a friend whose character is best described as if the wing gundam zero from endless waltz and shiny darkrai had a baby but then I sat there and realized something

"oh" "I can't draw gundam for shit dude"

which is fine and dandy so I decided to just take a break and try drawing something else which leads to an OC I've had on my mind way too much and I sat there like

"hey! she's just an anthropomorphic fox" "how hard can this be?"

then art block fucking killed me and it deadass felt like I forgot how to draw

whoops!!!!!!

but I managed to drag this out after mentally shaking myself in a VC with friends and erasing and redrawing shit fifty different times needed to remind myself that it did not have to be good it just had to be SOMETHING

and now here we are

yuanshu is a fox spirit, aka a kitsune or a huli jing (they're basically the same thing) she was created to protect a dying kingdom on the lunar plane, but then some events happened that led to her being instated as the kingdom's new ruler some of those events that led up to that moment costed her ability to feel emotion / sentiment. she essentially slowly removed aspects of herself that were deemed "impure" by the previous ruler, and over the years and eventually centuries, she became an embodiment of her desire / duty to protect her people. however, to some, she was seen as no more than a weapon or a machine.

or, well, that's how it was in the past. things got better when she met someone, but then things got way worse at some point, leading to her "death" and banishment into oblivion. in this image, this is where nothing went to shit yet

yuánshǔ is heavily based off of junko from touhou project, especially my variant / AU of her for a friend's RP setting. much of yuan shu's current personality and background is pulled from this alternate version of junko, as seen here.

anyone off of twitter or on discord likely saw this character before, as seen in a comic I haven't posted here (yet)

I mostly wound up making yuánshǔ cuz I felt like I was horribly butchering taaran (ponzoan, actually) junko's character lmao I was probably the only person who cared and people have said that I did fine, but. still

like yeah it's an AU, things should be different, but if you make things too different you can't really recognize the fact that the alternate version of this specific character is still supposed to depict this specific character so at that point it felt less like an alternate version of junko and more like. a new character parading around in a junko skin suit. and a white dress. so, yeah, I sat there like "well might as well make her an oc now" except since this is a rp setting, having junko suddenly use a new name and be a whole ass actual furry would be. awkward. and inconsistent.

then again I don't think anyone would've cared about that either lmao it's mostly just me maybe I'm just too prissy about it lmao

(junko isn't the only one I fucked up btw, there's also kaguya and hecatia. maybe someone else too) (so I'll. probably be making characters based off of them too)

[isfjmel-phleg]

March 2023 Books

(@lady-merian I do talk about reading the first L&C book, please feel free to ignore)

The In-Between by Rebecca Ansari

A fascinating fantastical premise to account for a real-world case of missing children. A bit dark but I did enjoy reading this.

The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett (reread)

Annual reread! You all know how I feel about this book.

The Secret Garden: The Cinematic Novel by Linda Chapman (reread)

Reread after watching the movie again, because I was curious how they compare. I originally read this before the movie came out. There were definitely parts of the novelization that are absent in the film, and the book does a more thorough job of explaining this. But on the whole they are pretty similar.

Understood Betsy by Dorothy Canfield Fisher (reread)

I remember reading an excerpt from this book in one of our elementary school readers. It's been a while since I read the whole book, but I enjoyed it more than I expected. I wish I had read it as a child.

The Secret Garden of Yanagi Inn by Amber A. Logan

The Japanese setting was this book's strength. As a retelling, however, I didn't love it. It transformed the story into a generic tale of a rather bland woman processing her grief and working through baggage from her past while on a mysterious photography job in Japan. It retained the basic beats of TSG but not so much the spirit of the story (which is not about healing from grief, why is that so hard to understand) or characters.

Messenger and Son by Lois Lowry

I don't know what the heck is going on in these stories' universe, and Messenger was rather bizarre and depressing, but Son had some interesting themes and proved a satisfying ending to the series.

The Humming Room by Ellen Potter (reread)

Reread for TSG season.

I love this retelling, but this time it struck me that I'm not especially crazy about Potter's choices in depicting her Dickon analogue. He's clearly designed to be a heartthrob (brooding nature boy! mysterious past! possibly one of the fae! ponytail!), maybe more that than a parallel to Dickon's actual role in the original. It doesn't ruin the book for me at all, but this time...I was kind of mentally rolling my eyes.

The Making of May by Gwyneth Rees

I wouldn't call this a retelling of TSG, because it isn't, but it interacts with that text and draws inspiration from it. The young heroine is particularly attached to a film version of TSG (clearly the 1975 miniseries) that she has on VHS, she identifies a lot with Mary, and like Mary she has a lot of growing to do in a mysterious old house with walled gardens. A more enjoyable book than I expected.

A Bit of Earth by Karuna Riazi

A retelling of TSG in a modern setting with a Pakistani heroine coming to live in Long Island. The cultural setting and many of the plot points are significantly different from the original, but very much in the same spirit. Riazi clearly loves and respects the original text while breathing her own fresh life into it. The blend of poetry interspersed with the prose that forms the majority of the narrative is a bold but effective choice. It enhances the emotion and gives insight into the heroine that we wouldn't have otherwise. I enjoyed this one more than I expected. Thank you for the recommendation, @allieinarden!

Whose Body? by Dorothy L. Sayers (reread)

Reread in a rush for a reading group.

The Chestry Oak by Kate Seredy

Seredy's books take me off guard with how powerful they can be. This one was no exception.

A Secret Princess by Margaret Stohl and Melissa de la Cruz

This was not good. I knew it was not going to be good. I read it anyway. I regret that.

A retelling should honor the spirit of the original while bringing something fresh and original to the story. This book did not do that. This Sara, Mary, and Cedric bore almost no resemblance to their original counterparts, and themes from Burnett's stories are discarded, even disdained. For some reason, the story is set in the 1860s, decades before Burnett's books were published/set, but little or no historical research seems to have been done, and the result was not very believable in its portrayal of nineteenth-century England. The plot is all over the place, and the romances are painfully forced. I was not impressed.

The Screaming Staircase by Jonathan Stroud

I really liked it! (...maybe not for the same reasons as everybody else, sorry, I am not swooning over anyone.) Stroud's prose is fantastic, and he turns the most effortlessly inventive similes. The characters are well-developed, and the story, even though it's not the type of plot I would normally seek out, is quite readable. I plan to finish the series.

The Secret Garden on 81st Street by Ivy Noelle Weir (reread)

Reread for TSG season.

A Treason of Thorns by Laura E. Weymouth

A friend has been on my case about forming a book club between the two of us, and she wanted me to pick the first book, something I hadn't read before. I arbitrarily selected this one, which was on my shelves. I regretted it. I wanted to love it, it has such a pretty cover, but I couldn't connect with the heroine and her motivations, and the pseudo-historical setting was distractingly implausible for me.

Mystery of the Black Diamonds and Mystery of the Green Cat by Phyllis A. Whitney

Black Diamonds hasn't aged well and has a bit of a far-fetched plot, but Green Cat was quite enjoyable. I appreciate how Whitney weaves her mystery plots with more interpersonally-focused plots that bring additional investment in the characters.

[quantummindclassicalheart]

Master post of quantum's Critical Role fic

You can now find me on AO3 as FiveCamellia! I will be gradually archiving older fic there. Various other things I’ve written including scicomm stuff and poetry live in my general #writing tag, feel free to check it out! For scicomm specifically, check out my #quantum talks quantum tag.

(This is a repost of my old pinned post, but with the new post format.)

a dream within a dream (AO3, Tumblr. New! Completed 2023/01/21.) > When the fog of Rumblecusp steals away Caleb’s memories, Jester must help him remember. But this time, it’s going to take a little more than a fifth-level spell slot. For Widojest Secret Santa 2022.

The Lovers’ Lie (original song) > There is an old folk song that is sung in Exandria.  It goes by a lot of titles–In Marquet it’s commonly known as The Liar’s Love, while natives of Xhorhas would know it as The Fey Groom, and the elves of Syngorn’s version has a title that translates to “The Sacrifice of Truth for Love.” This is one bard’s rendition of the song in Common, as accompanied by ukulele.

verbal and somatic (AO3) > In which Jester has a creative idea for how to use the Polymorph spell, and with a truly heroic effort (and the benefit of War Caster), Caleb succeeds on a series of concentration checks with increasingly high DC. (AKA: Widojest body swap sexy times.) (Post-campaign, established relationship AU.)

a soft place to land (AO3) > A few years after their travels with the Mighty Nein, Caleb and Jester reunite for the summer and kinda sorta fall in love all over again. (Post-campaign, as the summary suggests, but more or less canon-compliant)

a dream of flight (AO3) > My first Loquaerryn fic, about their first dance (and what comes after). Laerryn is used to taking the lead, but when she meets Loquatius Seelie, he challenges everything she knows about following.

rainy days and twisting braids > Yasha braids Beau’s hair, and softness follows. For Beauyasha Week 2022 Day 2: Hair. (Takes place post-campaign.)

like it’s the last time > A Widojest epilogue “missing scene,” i.e. the final conversation Caleb and Jester never got in canon. It’s the night before Fjord and Jester leave Nicodranas, and the Nein are throwing a party. Everything should be great. Except Caleb’s been distant lately, and Jester wants to know why. (Takes place during the Campaign 2 finale, roughly.)

waves of memory > A short Shadowgast piece based on some merperson!Essek AU art.

we must all tend our gardens > A character study of everyone's favorite drow hotboi and his complicated relationship with faith, as told through gardening. (Takes place during the Campaign 2 finale.)

[podfic] Die Smaragdwelle (Jade_Sabre) > A reading of Die Smaragdwelle, a fairy tale about a princess swallowed up by an emerald wave and the wizard who had to find her. (Featuring my vocal impressions of all the Mighty Nein.)

und andere Zemnische Volksmärchen > What if things had gone just a little differently post-Katzenprinz? (Fluff. Fluff is what happens.) For Widojest Week 2021 Day 6: Der Katzenprinz.

four-and-a-half waltzes of caleb widogast > A series of vignettes in which Caleb shares four dances with four of the most important people in his life, and learns to embrace the magic of possibility. (Spoilers for all of Campaign 2, minus the finale.)

the divine transmutation of the self > In which magic changes Veth, and Veth changes her mind about magic. (Spoilers through C2E97)

drawn together > Making stuff for (and with) the people you care about is a love language. In which Beau decides to learn how to draw, and also learns a few other things along the way. (Takes place sometime post-C2E111) 

a taste of summer > In which Caleb’s hidden talent for baking and Jester’s love of sweets collide in the best possible way. (Takes place sometime post-C2E111) 

sunrise over eiselcross > A little scene between Fjord and Jester from the morning after their big conversation in C2E118.

you're still there > Beau has a nightmare about a path not taken. Yasha’s there to help her through it. Cuddles ensue. (Takes place sometime post-C2E111)

disguise selves > An AU where Caleb and Jester are (human) roommates, preparing for a Halloween costume party over Zoom. Jester being Jester, she insists on a photo shoot in costume. Everything goes better than expected. (no spoilers)

the nature of possibility > Two things possessed me to write this: the concept of including some actual thermodynamics in a fic about dunamancy, and the idea of hand contact during a spellcraft lesson. What ensued was nearly a thousand words of Shadowgast. (Takes place sometime post-C2E77)

an unnatural tide > Caleb doesn't normally forget things. But Rumblecusp isn't a normal island. What did he forget that last morning? Here's my best guess. (Spoilers for C2E105)

[cfrog]

OC-tober Day 4: Redesign

[full prompt list]

A continuation of yesterday's, let's talk about the Sages' many redesigns! But first: some redraws :3c

[2018 -> 2023]

Full ramble under the cut. Read more at your own risk, it is long.

The Sages got their most recent redesigns in 2021. My main focus was making the Sages more unique in their looks, so it's not entirely just recolors of Sage. This is also when I made them all non-human. Lets go down the line.

[same picture as yesterday, i only have the one]

Again, theyre supposed to all be vaguely matchy. They all have bangs on the same side, they've all got some extra color at the ends of their hair, and they all have details under their eyes (freckles for Red, eyebags for Grey, scars for Yellow, blush for Blue). Aside from that, I kinda went wild with these versions.

The primary Sage's (Red Yellow and Blue) are all supposed to look very similar to Sage. Grey is the black sheep of the group, that should be clear on first glance. Red, though, is supposed to look the Most like Sage, because they have the most in common. The two are from similar time periods and, with the addition of Red being a werewolf, similar situations of hiding themselves. Being a werewolf also draws more attention to Red's anger issues, her original defining trait. It's really easy to tell when she's angry. Because she turns into a big dog. Older Red design had a red scarf across her midsection like a belt, because that's where her killing wound was. When I moved her wound to her heart (because its more poetic <3), the scarf came with! Technically, that dangling section is supposed to always cover her left side. I don't do that tho. ALSO as you may have noticed: Red used to be continually covered in blood. Her new design is less murderous, so that got removed, but I kept a subtle reference to it in her hair. Like really subtle. Here's a close up.

[red's blood-patterned hair, usually covered up by shading]

Anne (Grey's past life) was only given a design in 2019, for the Labyrinth OCT, based off of Grey's old design. Then when I redesigned Grey, I actually based her more off of Anne. Real telephone game going on. Stuff like the wrist/ankle scars just came from Anne's design. For this version of her, I flattened out her hair near the top to better resemble Sage and the others' hairstyles. It also looks pretty :3 Her full lore about what she is is.... so complicated. It's not important. She's a special type of ghost that makes her grayscale ok. I only made her skin pale instead of pure grey because it helps her stand out from Anne. Anne for reference:

[part of Anne's transition to Grey involved cutting off those dress sleeves]

Yellow got the most emo hairstyle of them all, which I think is funny, because she's also the oldest and most well-adjusted. This is when I moved her eye injury to her right side, so I can cover it up and not draw it. I generally just had a lot of problems with Yellow's eyes. I hated drawing glasses realistically, it was the main thing that kept me from drawing Yellow more on previous designs, so I decided to go full cartoon this time. And man I love it. Yellow is an elf btw, specifically from a modern fantasy 1960s-ish. Her main design inspo has always been "librarian" and I love to lean into it, BUT. This design was where I started letting her be a badass too. Hence the mysterious scars. Plus her conspiratorial streak and her wedding ring? God I made her so cool. Best redesign of the set.

And finally, a robot!! Originally, Blue was my excuse for memes and references. They were a gamer. They were a 4th wall breaker. I changed that last one for this design, meta powers revoked. But I let them keep the gamer references by making them from the future. Blue used to be just Some Teen Ghost, which was boring and realistic. I wanted them to have a full job and backstory. So I made them a fnaf reference. To emphasize the roboticness, I started drawing their hair goofy and blocky. I also switched their method of death from hanging to gunshot, to match all the others. Plus, I don't think hanging a robot would work. This moved their wound to their head, but again, hey I don't wanna draw a fucked up eye wound all the time. Solution: robot-based memory problems! Blue already had a thing for ignoring negative emotions, so it only makes sense they'd block out their own death. Their eye's still not entirely functional, though.

Hey, they weren't in yesterday's post, but let's talk about Violet too! Violet has always been a thing with the Sages, and funny enough, their name was always Violet. What exactly they are, though, has changed so many times. With this redesign, I offically made them Blue's "alter ego" (it fit with the fnaf references). Think of it as Blue but with all of those nasty memories. That means you get to see the eye wound on this one! They're also missing their ear on that side. And a solid chunk of their head.

[this Violet is from a meme redraw but I cut out the context]

These are my oldest ocs and I care about them so much. I put so much thought into these. I'm happy I finally get to type this all out. Here's a direct comparison of their hair and skin colors, look at the detail i put into this.

Blue's is technically just desaturated cause that's what mixing blue with orange does.

[killemwithkillness]

07/19/2023 | A History of Changes

  I started my book in early 2016.  Sixteen years old, both stupid and brilliant, full of false determination, naivety, and blind positivity that this was it: this would finally be the project I finished.

  Sure, I’d finished things before... when I was a kid.  But I was sixteen, not a kid any longer, in my mind.  I was ready to take on a substantial project.  One with an intricate plotline. (Not too intricate, of course, I wasn’t ready for politics or anything like that.)  One with dark subject matter. (But not too dark, of course, I was a good Christian girl.)  But while I wanted to represent my religion well, I was also suffering a great deal from depression, grief, and massive life changes that were uprooting me and everything I’d ever known.  I was a Christian, yes, but I needed something dark in my life to help me not feel so alone. 

  I had come up with the idea while sketching characters with a friend.  Drawing people and characters was nothing new to me.  But when I drew my MC for the first time, she siezed hold of me.  I needed to know her story.  I needed to tell it.  Book ideas would come and go over the years, just as they had before, but there was never another idea that stuck with me like this burdock of a book.  It was in my veins, and I couldn’t be rid of it.

  In 2017, I lost my childhood home and moved to a trailer in the woods with no wifi, and nothing but time on my hands.  Every single day, I made massive excavations to the story I so dearly loved, always wanting to make it better.  I killed characters, added them, deleted them, gave them traume, then added some more.  I added the dreaded politics.  Not because I wanted to, but because it was the right thing for the story.  Didn’t know political systems well enough?  I’d just have to learn.  Didn’t have a genre?  I’d have to make up a new one.  There was no plothole I couldn’t fill, no writers block I couldn’t jump.  

  Late teen years turned into early adulthood, and as I changed, my book changed with me, always finding a way to associate itself with whatever struggle I was facing.  The subject matter turned even darker, but sharper and more honed on issues that mattered to me.  I brought friends in, started groupchats, took criticism, sought out knowledge on the science of storytelling.  I learned the rules and, better, learned the benefit of breaking them.

  In 2021, the last dregs of my adolescent belief system died as I escaped the Evangelical cult I was raised in, came out as queer, discovered my neurodivergence, and began rebuilding from the ground up.  It took over a year for me to be able to look at my book again.  It was, and still sometimes is, painful to try and connect with anything tied to what now feels like a past life and a dead version of myself. But I believe there is still worth in telling a story I have poured so much of my life into, and every passing year has proven that lived experience is the most valuable tool in a writer’s belt.

  There would be many iterations of my WIP’s name until it finally became what I know it as now: The Wayward Sister, Book 1 of the Kingsburrow Duology (an Adult Political Fantasy Drama). Now more than ever I connect to its’ themes of patriarchal capitolism and religious cultism.  I see it as a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts; that I instinctually included themes when I was young that would later come to be very relevant to my personal life.

  I am 23 now; older and (I hope) wiser.  I spend my days discovering and recovering who I am and what I believe.  My book is no different.  It is going through major changes, but that isn’t a bad thing.  In fact, I’m more excited than ever to finally feel like I have complete control to do with the story what I want, and not what I feel I should do.  I am editing the pages with a new perspective, and I’ll be honest I don’t always like what I find.  But I’m going to change that.  Even if it takes another 8 years.