#i should do something like this more often lol
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Wahoo I get to join in something fun again :D thx @kosmas-posts (Though I think I may have already joined .>. soguanufjds I mean some of my answers changed.)
Last song:Flowers by Miley Cyrus
favorite colour: colours found in crayon boxes.
Last book:I don't even remember :0 (But for finished books then fourth wing, but that book wasn't my jam I have no idea how I powered through it...)
Last movie: fnaf movie :)
Last show:Digital circus
sweet/spicy/savoury:Sweet and savoury (never ever gonna survive spicy😔)
relationship statues:Single Pringle :D👍
Last thing googled :Bored button (probably should do that more often instead of asking to draw others ocs only for it to take forever cus I procrastinate tooo muuuuuchhhh.....)
Current obssesstion :art in general, my ocs (Always gonna be bias for my goobers), others ocs (What can I say there fun to think about time to time), trying to learn a different language in general even though that shits never gonna work since I forget a lot of the important things and hell talking is going to suck with how shitty I talk in English lol, Not much obsession for anything else recently though .
looking forward to : Any fun game that catches my interest (Like there is one but I didn't realize trying to download the game would be so hard- I should probably look for a play through, others ocs (There all silly fucked up goobers, All of them!),FINISHING THE AMOUNT OF THINGS I SAID "YA I'LL DRAW THAT!" Like I know there's no need to pressure myself cus it's free but I think I get to be pissed over myself for taking so long even if the holidays are the only time I got a chance to even start >:[ damn why does time have to go by so fast?
no pressure tags :D (Sorry if it turns out ya'll did this already cus honestly I forgot, so not that many tags this time) @elysiiawrites @kitab00m101 @girlwholikestodrawalot @sheepyphi @zithergiltscorner
Ten People I’d Like to Get to Know Better
tagged by: @orphiclovers
last song: It’s all been Christmas retail crap or if you count the radio on the drive home playing Avril Lavigne
fav color: this pale seafoam green for things or white for clothes
last book: Eclipse by Wilder (poetry)
last movie: Deadpool & Wolverine
last show: N/A
sweet/spicy/savory: sweet and savory
relationship status: 4 people proposed to me this year. 1 meant it fr 🥹 (engaged irl) otherwise I have a harem on AO3 going.
last thing i googled: how big is a wintermelon?
current obsession: cooking and Infinity Nikki
looking forward to: I’m planning a road trip with the girls later this week!!
Tagging: @auuwmk, @ssunfish, @ajhaijma, @stoneclaw, @quiteboared, @kiwiandmint, @dgeneralacc, @rex44201, @readingdreaming4951, @thottykunikida
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Can we talk about Cartman's tendency to pet Kyle? And the way Kyle lets him do it?
It's such an under-discussed part of their dynamic. Cartman does this all the time. He does it to tease Kyle. He does it to comfort him. He does it to express gratitude. He even does it to pictures of Kyle when Kyle's not there.
And you could say that's just Cartman, he's just touchy, that's just how he expresses himself . . . except that it's really not. All this petting and stroking isn't something you see him do with Stan and Kenny. (Friends he has said multiple times he loves.) It's not something he does with his actual pet, Mr Kitty. It's not something he does with his mom. It's not even something he does with Heidi or Yentl. There's a lot of hand-holding and kissing in those relationships, but Cartman appears to consider this expected romantic partner behavior, and to be imitating that accordingly. What you don't see with them is the clingy, almost unconscious need to touch he demonstrates with Kyle. Kyle has to be stroked, patted, petted, hugged, poked, pulled on . . . it seems to be a comfort thing for Cartman, and that is just so fascinating to me.
It's also endlessly fascinating to me that Kyle - who has no problem putting Cartman in his place about anything else - allows this nearly every time. Maybe there's some token complaining, but he never actually tries to stop it. It's not "ew, Cartman is hugging me" it's always "why is Cartman hugging me?" and that's a subtle difference I think gets overlooked. People like to claim Kyle's response to Cartman having a crush on him would be disgust, and that Kyman could only ever be one-sided for this reason. But Kyle's response to Cartman being affectionate with him is actually pretty much always confusion, not disgust. I get the impression Kyle doesn't know how he feels about it.
I'm not sure what I'm trying to say here, but it's just so interesting to me, the relationship they both have to touch. Cartman uses Kyle to fulfil his need for touch and connection - and Kyle doesn't often reciprocate this touch, but he pretty consistently makes the concession of allowing it. They're feeling each other out, trying to work out "who are you to me and what do I feel for you?" It's one of the elements of Kyman that makes the ship so endearing, I think. There's this sweetness to it that absolutely should not exist between these characters, but does anyway.
Definitely! You’re right, Cartman does seem to seek out physical contact with Kyle considerably more than with anyone else he isn’t directly romantically involved with and my favourite instances of this is when he does so under the guise of antagonizing him. Two examples of this are the whole ‘Jennifer Lopez’-thing in “Fat Butt and Pancake Head” and Cartman promoting Kyle to the Germans in “Funnybot”. In both cases he uses an instance of disrespecting Kyle as a front to compliment him, with the ‘Jennifer Lopez’-persona constantly being gushing over him, telling him how much she likes him, calling him ‘handsome’ and of course ‘kissing’ him by Cartman pressing his hand against Kyle’s mouth. This is especially interesting considering the fact that later in the episode it is very heavily implied (and then pretty much outright confirmed in “200”) that Cartman really doesn’t have full control over the character. In “Funnybot” Cartman calls Kyle either ‘gentle/soft’ or ‘juicy’ (lol), ‘pretty’, and ‘very beautiful’ in extremely mangled German (which I guess is just regular German in-universe since the native speakers talk just like that) and while the context of the scene is obviously very dark for the viewer, who can infer what’s going on, Kyle doesn’t actually seem to realise what is happening. He doesn’t appear to understand what is being said at all and as such Cartman doesn’t even really have the excuse that he’s teasing him.
This scene fits the reaction you described that Kyle tends to have when Cartman engages him in physical contact very well: Kyle reacts to Cartman excessively touching him with confusion but simply lets it happen. He has every reason to be wary of Cartman’s intentions and yet he makes no effort to stop him from what he’s doing. In “ManBearPig” Kyle wakes up to find Cartman leaning over him and while he doesn’t actually touch him, he does get extremely close to him, giving us the famous image of their faces mere inches apart. Kyle’s reaction to this is incredibly understated: He appears at most slightly irritated and attempts neither to push Cartman off nor to move away from him. Once again, he mostly just seems confused by Cartman’s behaviour but, as far as we can see, makes no further attempts to investigate the reasons behind it. This understated reaction is an indication of an (imo) often overlooked aspect of their relationship, which is that while Kyle is well aware of what Cartman is theoretically capable of, he doesn’t actually seem worried that he’d ever seriously harm him. Personally, if I found myself trapped in a cave with a person who constantly professes his hatred for me and whom I know has no qualms about killing people, and then woke up to find said person looming over me in my sleep I’d be much more worried than Kyle appears to be. In fact, considering everything that has happened over the course of their relationship and how many despicable things Cartman has done, Kyle seems Weirdly Comfortable And Safe With His Evil, Ill-Intentioned Friend. Because that’s what they are: They’re friends. To call it a complicated friendship might be an understatement but when it comes down to it the simple fact of the matter is that these two do like each other. While in earlier seasons a point could be made that they only spend time together out of necessity (with the main four being somewhat isolated from the other kids, as Craig points out in “Pandemic 2”, and Cartman originally being an incidental part of the group as ‘the friend no one likes’), they’ve both long since expanded their social circles to a point where they are no longer ‘forced’ to spend time together for lack of better options. Kyle would be more than justified in cutting Cartman off completely and yet he doesn’t and I can honestly see no real reason for this other than the fact that he simply cares about him as a person.
So I agree that Kyle probably wouldn’t react with disgust to the hypothetical reveal that Cartman harbours romantic feelings towards him. I’m not claiming that he would necessarily be elated but I’m pretty sure ‘disgust’ would not be his first reaction and I think many people who think that it would be might at least partially hold that opinion due to projection: Because while we, as viewers, are frequently meant to find Cartman repulsive both physically and emotionally (his embodiment of the 'fat bastard' trope is a key part of his character, after all), Kyle doesn’t actually appear to overtly feel that way about him – which is to say he does kinda but not exclusively and it’s all just a bit more complicated than that. Kyle being thoroughly confused does seem like the most likely reaction to me. Regarding the physical aspect: Of course Kyle frequently makes derogatory remarks about Cartman’s appearance, specifically regarding his weight (to the point where it’s been a main focus of their dynamic for almost thirty years) but we see several times that his critique actually seems to stem from a place of worry and that he feels bad when he thinks that these comments have actually managed to hurt his feelings (e.g. “Raising the Bar”). Of course, what exactly Kyle’s feelings towards Cartman are is, with good reason, a source of much discussion and I’d claim that Kyle himself isn’t very sure of this. His sentiment towards Cartman definitely seems very erratic, with Kyle going from actively attempting to get him killed in “Fatbeard” to being concerned for his emotional well-being just a season later (“201”, “Poor and Stupid”). This concern Kyle has for a person he supposedly can’t stand has been a pretty consistent part of his character in later seasons and it’s especially striking when compared to the way he disregards his best friend’s feelings when he’s in genuine need of emotional support (“Raisins”, “You’re Getting Old”). This discrepancy is not only an indicator of the complicated relationship Kyle has with Cartman but imho also hints at at least one reason for it. In a (painfully long-winded😅) comment on AO3 I just touched on the similarities between Kyle and Cartman how interesting I find the very different ways in which they deal with their shared character traits. I believe this is something that draws them towards each other, though I’m certain that neither is actually consciously aware of this. You put it so beautifully in your last sentence: "There's this sweetness to it that absolutely should not exist between these characters, but does anyway." There really is an unexpectedly soft underbelly to their relationship that is a lot of fun to explore. While I wont deny the toxic aspects of this ship (in fact, they’re a major part of what I find interesting about it), there is also the surprising potential for a real emotional connection between these characters.
#south park#kyman#sp kyman#south park analysis#south park meta#sp meta#sp cartman#eric cartman#sp kyle#kyle broflovski#my thoughts on yaoi#my own stuff
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Concerning your theory on Desmond protecting Eloise and knowing her from before the killing game, I think I found something that could be used as evidence for that.
During his introduction in chapter 0, Desmond phrases the fact he never killed anybody in a specific manner : he says
"I only practice on stationary targets. Moving targets are really outside my comfort zone. Believe me, I've never taken a human life."
He never denies having shot somebody, he only says that he never killed someone, and that he doesn't like moving targets.
That seems to be in accord with the theory that Desmond is protecting somebody from before the killing game, as a bodyguard might not have to do any murdering, simply incapacitating any threats.
As for who he protects, I think the scene where Desmond bring attention to the broken locks.
Eloise is quick to understand what Desmond is doing, defending his decision in front of everyone, saying
"I think I get what he's trying to say. You just want to everyone to be honest with each other... so we can cover all our bases... right?"
afterward, Eloise reacts to both Toshiko attempts to choose herself the pairs, and to Ingrid saying they should separate by gender.
While Desmond can keep his calm as it was already established that he was good staying composed, but Eloise, as is shown in her Free time events.
I would also like to hear your opinion on the theory that the organizers of the killing game are previous ultimates. I think we can prove two, and extrapolate two more.
I think Tozu is clearly the ultimate actor, or maybe playwright. He is quite theatrical, and he often makes literary references, from Horace to the bible. He also, in a Inner World (the scenes when Damon sleeps, taking the place of the monokuma theater), he said :
"that's what we in the industry like to call a "cliffhanger"."
Which implies he is from an industry that uses that term, so some form of media.
Mara is most likely an ultimate soldier, or similar, as she uses guns, and dresses similarly to Mukuro.
The two we can extrapolate don't have name, and one doesn't have any known talent.
The one we don't know anything about is the one mentioned in the Inner world about ships. Tozu mentions a "spindly boy with cream-colored hair". I think he is also part of the killing game organizer, even if we know nothing about him, simply because he is described physically.
The second we can extrapolate is the previous ultimate debater. In Wenona's Free time events, we learn that there was an ultimate debater before Damon, who was also more accomplished than him. I think he is part of the killing game organizers mainly because it would fit the theme, as a previous debater but with a more "important" or "real" talent than Damon.
Oh wow I did not think there'd be more evidence to support the idea of Desmond and Eloise being in some form of alliance, but the more clues people bring up the more I'm kind of convinced of it as well. I also noticed that when Desmond said he'd never "killed anyone", he didn't explicitly say he's never actually shot at a moving target, just that he's not that great at it (which I don't believe lol how could you be the Ultimate Marksman if you can't actually hit a moving target?)
However, I think the point in your second theory could have something to do with it. Damon mentions that nowadays the title of Ultimate is just "given to anyone" and has kind of lost it's meaning. And when you think about it, it makes sense when you really examine each character and how they use their talent. Damon is a debater, but he rarely uses it to argue for himself, choosing to instead use it to argue in favor of other people's points.
Eva was the Ultimate Mathlete, but she was clearly good at other things besides math. So if she wanted to, why didn't this Ultimate talent program give her a different title, or one that could encompass all of her actual talents?
Kai is the Ultimate Influencer, but a lot of the people there don't recognize him at all.
Ulysses is the Ultimate Historian but he doesn't even remember everything, and has to write most of it down.
They all are stuck with a talent but either aren't as great at it as you'd expect, or have something holding them back from really excelling in said talent. I wonder if this Killing Game is being put on by truly great Ultimates who lost their titles to the current cast of characters? Imagine you work hard for god knows how long to get recognition, but you lose it all because some kid who's not even that great at it becomes better anyways lol
And from the way Eva described it, being an Ultimate really dictates how people see you in this society. She wrote a lot of papers on other subjects but they were all ignored because "She's the Ultimate Mathlete" and that's all.
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How to begin writing TODAY!
Writing is like a plant. It needs time, care, and love. Your stories won't write themselves—you need to put in the time to learn to write, and then actually write them down, y’know.
All of it takes time. A lot, I’m afraid. And it takes even more time to start seeing any form of results. People spend years honing their crafts before they even self-publish a single novella on Amazon.
That's why people don't get anywhere if they don't enjoy just the writing part—you can never earn from writing until you’ve spent a lot of time and resources into the craft. It’s kinda like YouTube—you need that watchtime on your channel before you can monetize. But the thing is: writing doesn't have a watchtime feature. You can't quantify how far you’ve come and how far you’ve still got to go.
You need to discipline yourself if you wanna get somewhere. But… how do you do that, lol? Here’s my two pennies on how to start writing, and keep up at it.
***
#01 - When to Start
You can’t pick up your laptop one random day and just start writing a story. Nope, that's not how it works, even though some might say otherwise.
A good writer should understand when is the right time to start typing the words out, y’know. If you have an idea for a story, you need to have some form of outline. Yeah, you can be a pantser—it’s a term used for those fiction writers who write without an outline—but at least you need some form of story. Know the beginning, at least. And know your characters.
Know something about your story, and the direction you want to take it, before you start putting pen to paper.
The reason I’m suggesting you this is because just inspiration is not enough. It can get you somewhere, but after a point, you might feel lost. Stories often end up in places where you might not want them to be, and then you just feel disheartened. Or, ideas might just stop hitting you after some point.
An idea of where to begin is enough, but you also need an idea of where to end. I’ve personally tried several times where I just had a single-line idea of a plot, and I wanted to create a story out of it. Didn't work. I personally need some loose outlines to start first.
What I’m trying to get at is you should know what’s the best time for you to start writing your story. Some don't write a single word before they know exact what happens when, and how. Some, like me, need some loose outlines. Some don't need outlines at all—just the first scene is enough to get them started.
Know what you are—a pantser, planner, or plantser—and start only when you feel like you have enough ideas that could keep you going for a couple weeks. Or if you feel like you could churn enough ideas that could keep you going.
***
#02 - Time
Writing takes time. And if you wanna get somewhere, you need to have a schedule.
Y’know, different writers might commit different amounts of time to writing. Some write once or twice a week, some (liek me lol) write everyday. And, you need to know which one works for you.
And—and I hate to be the bearer of bad news—it doesn't depend on you. The amount of time you can spend on writing depends more on your life. Are you a student? Or do you work?
And how many friends do you have? How busy is your work?
You need to take care of all these aspects of life that you can't mess up with, and then softly rearrange them all to fit something like writing in it. That’s why I hated the times when I shifted schools, houses, or when I was promoted to college. Because those shifts meant that I had to rearrange my day’s schedule again, and somehow fit writing in it.
And, before you start rearranging everything, I need to tell you something else—you need to be realistic about it. You can't just come back from college and sit back to write, y’know. If you generally take some rest during that time, take your rest. Please. Don't cut down on the time you rest or eat or sleep.
Why, you might ask? Is it because I care about you fellow writer? NO!
The thing is: it just won't work. You need sleep and food and rest to keep functioning, and if you think you can cut on that time and allot it to writing, you won't be able to keep on doing it long-term. You’d relapse. There would be days you’d be hungry, or sleepy, or tired, and you’d think you should just rather go take care of yourself instead of writing. And then you’d do that. And soon, you’d stop writing altogether.
I wrote at six to eight in the morning everyday for a couple of months. But I’m just not a morning person. I can't sleep before twelve in the night, and so I was sleeping for, like, four-five hours a night. You can't keep on going with that sort of schedule.
Firstly, I was sleepy all the time. When writing too, yeah—even though I’d just woke up and taken a bath—but also during my lectures. I slept through all of my political science classes and nearly failed that course. Zero-on-ten experience, not recommended.
Secondly, like I said, you’d relapse. Be true to yourself. You can't keep going on like this, man. Going to bed at one, waking up at five won't work for long. A recipe for disaster.
That's why I urge you to be realistic with the schedule that you make for yourself. Yeah, make a schedule. And appoint time for writing only where you know it’d work. Take enough rest, sleep, and use enough Instagram too.
***
#03 - Know When to Skip
Yeah. There are, no doubts, going to be days when you just don't feel like it. Writing feels like a pain, ideas don't hit you anymore, you’ve just come from a stressful day at work and are tired. We’ve all been there.
At that point, you need to ask yourself: are you really tired, or are you just tired for writing?
I mean, if it’s the first, you should probably work on your schedule. If it’s a one-day thing, that’s fine. Skip it.
But, if it’s the second reason, you need to dig deeper. Why does writing tire you now? Why are you not interested in your story anymore? Where’s the spark gone?
There's a high chance that you’re just not motivated to write this story, y’know. Writing can be a pain for a lot of reasons.
One thing you need to keep writing is to keep yourself motivated. To keep yourself interested. Because that’s how you’d be willing to spend more and more time as days go by, y’know.
And, if it’s the second reason: don't skip. Sit down. Write. And think about what’s not working. And why is it not working. You need to diagnose this problem yourself, and then fix it.
***
#04 - Know When to Go on a Break
I can’t even stress on how many times I’ve tried skipping on trips with my family just because I wanted to write. And I should stress even more on how many times I’ve kept myself going on when I was burnt down to my core and needed a break.
When you’re too pumped up, you do all that stuff. But, as they say, even a lot of something is bad for you. Same with writing.
It’s kinda hard to believe, but that’s true. Firstly, don't skip on stuff. Live your life. If there are days your friends are calling you for a party, and that means you have to skip writing—do it. Skip writing.
Go travel with your family. Go live life, man. You don't just need the skills to write, after all—you need these experiences too. So go get ‘em.
Secondly, know when you’re burnt out. Regular hiatuses are important for any author. Don't start working on the next book of your trilogy if you’ve just completed the first. Go take a break first.
Don't push yourself too hard. I did that. Very recently. I was burnt out to my core, and it was hard pushing myself through. But I loved writing, so I made sure I took out two hours of my day for that.
But my story suffered. I lost all interest in it. Writers’ block hit me hard—even though I was working on a second draft, so I mostly knew where I was gonna take the story forward. I averaged around three-four hundred words a day—and that’s when I could actually write something—even though I used to average around fifteen-hundred a day. A big fall. And, there were days I just wrote a hundred words in two hours.
Those were some hard times, to be honest. I literally thought that I was probably growing out of it, and I was afraid if I did. Luckily, it was just a burnout, and a two-week’s break was enough to get me back.
And I’d scrapped the old project, lol. It was seriously bad.
Anyway, what I mean is that you need to know when to take breaks too. Writing is not just about writing. It’s also about learning about life.
***
Conclusion
I have an important announcement to make today. I’ve finally launched my very own newsletter! Yeah, that’s right. Now you’d find a really annoying click-me-master link at the very end of every single one of my blogs.
So, if you want more blogs like this one straight onto your inbox, click here!
I hope you have a nice day. Meet’cha next time!
#writers and poets#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#writeblr#writing advice#creative writing#writers life#on writing#writing
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To make a mend
#it's not often you get to rip a canvas open :3#i like the three dimensionality of this#i should do something like this more often lol#art
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personal experiences. sharing things for the sake of sharing at this point
the game doesn't have a whole lot of words to translate but russian translation hits different somehow
#buckshot roulette#buckshot roulette fanart#buckshot roulette dealer#dealer buckshot roulette#the dealer#doodle post#doodle dump#every now and then i remember that posting rough nonsense on my artblog isn't a crime and maybe something i should do more often#i only have like two people i usually share these with and both of them are learning of the game solely through me lol#the grid is just a csp image material i found recently. leaving it in because i feel like it adds to it#edit: i uploaded the Wrong screenshot version goddammit#also: 'last dance' would probably br more accurate in place of 'final' if i wanted to be Direct but i forgot to change it
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Hey when your art friends share their work with you, please take note to not turn that into a vent session about how your own stuff sucks... It's just gonna make your friend feel like their art is hurting you, and they're not gonna share anymore.
#talking about this with someone#and realizing how little i share my work#cause of how often it's immediately met with some insecurities#and then after a conversation of me comforting someone and complimenting them#we get to the other side. and they never even said anything nice about my art#its happened. more often than i feel should be happening#but i know a lot of artists are insecure#and feeling jealous is normal#but like. feelings and actions...#making your friends feel bad cause youre jealous of them is not normal. dont do that#i dont even share all my work on social media lmfao#cause ive posted and then 5 minutes later seen someone post the same insecurities they did in dms#so genuinely i only share when its like. funny?#or if i just. am really proud of something#and just want to hear something nice about it#hurts to be met with silence but it happens#no one is obligated to give me compliments#its my job to create and when i do a good job i will be rewarded for that#but if im not doing a good job then. i wont! and thats on me!#but people ARE obligated to not be treating me as an object of their jealousy#and putting their emotional pain on me just cause i (looks at smudged writing on hand) drew something they liked#whatever#just thinking about it#my thoughts are not complete and i dont want this going around LOL#delete later
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Wild how we know that Elizabeth Woodville was officially appointed to royal councils in her own right during her husband’s reign and fortified the Tower of London in preparation of a siege while 8-months pregnant and had forces gathering at Westminster “in the queen’s name” in 1483 – only for NONE of these things to be even included, let alone explored, in the vast majority of scholarship and historical novels involving her.
#lol I don't remember writing this - I found it when I was searching for something else in my drafts. But it's 100% true so I had to post it.#elizabeth woodville#my post#Imo this is mainly because Elizabeth's negative historiography has always involved both vilification and diminishment in equal measure.#and because her brand of vilification (femme fatale; intriguer) suggests more indirect/“feminine” than legitimate/forceful types of power#It's still bizarre though-you'd think these would be some of the most famous & defining aspects of Elizabeth's life. But apparently not#I guess she only matters when it comes to marrying Edward and Promoting Her Family and scheming against Richard#There is very lacking interest in her beyond those things even in her traditionally negative depictions#And most of her “reassessments” tend to do diminish her so badly she's rendered utterly irrelevant and almost pathetic by the end of it#Even when some of these things *are* mentioned they're never truly emphasized as they should be.#See: her formal appointment in royal councils. It was highly unconventional + entirely unprecedented for queens in the 14th & 15th century#You'd think this would be incredibly important and highlighted when analyzing late medieval queenship in England but apparently not#Historians are more willing to straight-up INVENT positions & roles for so many other late medieval queens/king's mothers that didn't exist#(not getting into this right now it's too long...)#But somehow acknowledging and discussing Elizabeth's ACTUAL formally appointed role is too much for them I guess#She's either subsumed into the general vilification of her family (never mind that they were known as 'the queen's kin' to actual#contemporaries; they were defined by HER not the other way around) or she's rendered utterly insignificant by historians. Often both.#But at the end of the day her individual role and identity often overlooked or downplayed in both scenarios#and ofc I've said this before but - there has literally never been a proper reassessment of Elizabeth's role in 1483-85 TILL DATE#despite the fact that it's such a sensational and well-known time period in medieval England#This isn't even a Wars of the Roses thing. Both Margaret of Anjou and Margaret Beaufort have had multiple different reassessments#of their roles and positions during their respective crises/upheavals by now;#There is simply a distinct lack of interest in reassessing Elizabeth in a similar way and I think this needs to be acknowledged.#Speaking of which - there's also a persistent habit of analyzing her through the context of Margaret of Anjou or Elizabeth of York#(either as a parallel or a foil) rather than as a historical figure in HER OWN RIGHT#that's also too long to get into I just wanted to point it out because I hate it and I think it's utterly senseless#I've so much to say about how all of this affects her portrayal in historical fiction as well but that's going into a whole other tangent#ofc there are other things but these in particular *really* frustrate me#just felt like ranting a bit in the tags because these are all things that I want to individually discuss someday with proper posts...
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Broke (2016): BBC Sherlock is a phenomenal piece of media and anything that seems like a flaw just hasn't been fully explored yet
Woke (2020): BBC Sherlock is an incredibly flawed series run by an egotistical writer, it never deserved the hype and is actively bad on so many fronts (especially representation)
Bespoke (2024): BBC Sherlock is flawed and bogged down by increasingly poor writing, which many fans refused to see while it was airing, leading to hugely misplaced expectations (particularly for the final series), AND it has the seeds of some compelling characterizations and portrayals, some genuinely solid performances, and touches--albeit imperfectly--on complexities that are still being discussed today (particularly as it relates to the relationship between Sherlock and John). The huge cultural impact of the show has created a massive pendulum effect in its public perception, leading to most people today remembering a caricature of the show (whether positive or negative) rather than appreciating its nuanced merits and failings...that being said Season 4 sucked
#these just sum up my personal takes at the years in question and also what i'm seeing on tumblr/other social media#bbc sherlock#sherlock holmes#and i actually have a lot more thoughts to share on this series#specifically relating to the cultural impact#there is SO much about the show that goes unappreciated in hindsight because of how public perception of it has soured#and i totally fell into this as well--i still regularly rewatch hbomberguy's video absolutely dismantling the series and he isn't wrong!!#but what i'm saying is that i think it's easy for us to look at a piece of media (especially one so massively popular) like sherlock...#with very black-and-white lenses. it wouldn't have become so popular if there wasn't something inherent in it that resonated with people#and that's being buried (and i totally forgot it) because 'sherlock is cringe and problematic. can't believe i liked that'#which again it IS full of issues and those are well-documented as they should be. future portrayals should not repeat those mistakes#BUT being able to impact so many people is a merit in itself. and that's only possible because of other genuinely good things about the show#yes the way they handled the relationship between john and sherlock was riddled with problems YES it was often queerbaiting#AND the way they portrayed that relationship had a deep effect on me. i saw a lot of myself in sherlock and the complex way he loved john#the nuanced feelings he had about john's marriage to mary. the part (in s4!) where john calls him inhuman for not feeling romantic love#there was genuine intention and care put into some parts of this show and it comes through in scenes like those. they impact people.#and because of this realization i'm going to (eventually) do a rewatch of the show. i'm much older and i want to see how i'll view it now#but i want to go into it--and i want everyone who engages with it still--to have an open mind and evaluate it for what it is#not what we expected it to be (secret episode anyone?) or what the cultural drift has turned it into (the tiktok of sherlock's mind palace)#but the messy problematic somewhat-heartfelt massively significant and ultimately meaningful piece of media it actually was#anyway that's my thoughts would love to hear y'all's perspectives#funny how after all this time making a sherlock post still feels like i'm poking a bees' nest lol please be kind!#kay can i just catch my breath for a second#kay has a party in the tags
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Thinkin about the Meat Marionette Au, specifically the batclan having two bodies. And I apologize if this is rambling lol
I feel like they still train and work out most days (look Bruce has gotten used to picking up his kids, he's not going to stop even if he's in his human body). It's just probably not to the same extent as in canon of a daily thing without giving their bodies a break. That probably actually means their human bodies are healthier than in canon, seeing as one actually needs to let their muscles rest between exercising them. Not to mention they- or at least their bodies- are getting rest. Hell it's almost like their bodies are in comas for a few hours each night what with how low their brain activity would register as.
Now I'm thinking this probably influences how they act and appear towards the public. They shy away from most interviews (they're trying not to hiss or growl) and are mostly quiet whenever they speak in public, so it'd be easier for the tabloids to spin a story about a shy or demure family doing their best to help Gotham. Which is... the complete opposite of what they are, but no one needs to know that.
Others might even go the mysterious hermit route when trying to write a story about the Waynes, seeing as they're not spotted outside often (what with uses of disguises and such) save for the times the patriarch of the family has gone on another adoption spree. Honestly most of the stories about them are either having to do with Wayne industries, the very rare gala that everyone is wanting into, or the several adoptions that have been reported on several times.
Online is another story probably, and there's definitely several memes about each Wayne family member's posts. They're somehow Gotham's darlings despite being social recluses.
That being said, being connected to the Tunnels definitely has an effect on them even in their original human bodies. Not just mentally but physically as well. Like there is some definite off vibes the longer one is in their presence, their movements just a hint too graceful and something almost... predatory about it.
Also slightly random but I feel like Bruce would grow his hair out, like not even purposely at first. He just got caught up in cases and trying to figure out the meat-marionettes (thank you Dick for the name, but did you really have to call them that) that he forgot to get it cut several times. And by then it's just easier to put it in a ponytail than stay still for however long it'd take to get it cut and well, actually look good even if he himself doesn't care about it. Then he also gets kids who want to learn how to do things like braiding hair, which means he learns too and... yeah...
This au is a combo of my cryptid batfam and @phoenixcatch7's possessed doll au, which you need to check out because it's great. A really fun concept and influences a lot of this Au concept too. Also mutual of mine do you have any ideas for their civilian IDs
#meat marionette au#batman au#bruce wayne#batman#dc#dcu#They probably give off fae vibes in their base human bodies lol#Very pretty and fit with barely any blemishes and just this... *off* feeling around them the longer you're around them#They do go out pretty often actually but there's not many photos or proof of it#One of the photos has *all* of them in dresses at a Gala because someone was being an asshole about Steph wearing a suit in a previous one#Also did you know Dick had long hair in several comic issues which I think should be talked about more often#Dunno what to do with Jarro in this au#Like does his starfish body start slowly getting changed into something humanoid??#Do they build him a human body using what they've learned from the meat marionettes???#Or is he still a starfish just with a meat marionette body too?
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Expect clip posting to slow down due to irl nonsense.
Also from the 11th to the 18th I won’t have any computer access and very little internet access but I’ll schedule a couple clips beforehand for that week 🫡
#idk how often the posts will be. maybe 3-4 a week#12 hr workday + no real privacy in my room#means I could only edit late at night#or on the weekend#and it feels like such a waste of my tiny bit of free time#to be sitting at my desk pretending to do something as I wait for my mom to gtfo of my room#I think all the typing makes her suspicious idk man#it made what should have taken 45 mins take up to 2 hrs sometimes#so I will be attempting to do all my editing on friday/saturday and queue the posts#what I’ve been doing is scheduling 2-4 days of posts at a time#but like I said. doing it during the weekday is extremely time consuming due to being watched :p#on the weekends she’s less nosy and I can just wait for her to be asleep lol#if tumblr didn’t have an audio upload limit then I could just go all out for like 3 hrs and have a big queue lined up#it will actually take me less time to edit on a friday/saturday just cause I won’t be interrupted at all at nignt. lol.#tldr: I have very little free time and am interrupted constantly during the week#it will be easier for me to edit late at night on the weekend#and schedule the posts throughout the week#at the cost of no more daily posts (blame tumblr audio limit)#non voice post
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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ester on the brainnnnnn (he/she for the character!!)
#these are lowkey old#i drew these sketches in june in preparations for artfight#just additional outfits and expressions and stuff#I dont really do things like that often but i think i should. it's so fun playing with expressions and fits#and about ester.. i wrote her to be a mysterious character who doesnt talk about herself much#but it's not like oooh he's mysterious because he's quiet ooooohhh because he's shy#no it's more like. she is such an extrovert and likes talking and gossiping with people#and is always very vocal about political and social issues you can talk with her about literally everything!!!#but when you think about him and what you know about his personal life literally nothing comes to mind#and you realise he never really tells you anything about himself despite being so outgoing and talkative#also he's a serial complainer. lol#she'll always find something to nitpick on#also a funfact he is my oldest oc ive had him since i was like 12#my art#original character#oc#drawing#digital art#sketch#oc sketches#facial expressions#dycha za zbycha
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the ability to change fate... that's the power you were fighting to stop.
redraw of something i made at 14!!! wild how time passes
no effects vers and original under the cut
dated august 3, 2020. so i was actually 13 but I don't feel like correcting it. basically 14
the little caption i put is the one i made for this in ibis paint lmao
#my art#it's so funny that i've liked undertale for so long#i liked it even before i understood the plot#bc somehow i managed to watch ut comic dubs on yt#i only knew about frisk chara toriel sans and papyrus#because literally no one else showed up often enough for me to identify them#another bad thing about that was that frisk and chara would constantly be gendered#so that was confusing#but by the time i drew the original there i understood the actual game itself#hence the flowey quote#I DIDNT EVEN KNOW FLOWEY EXISTED#the FIRST character you meet in game#are you kidding me#i like the stupid gray guy i drew in place of the player#i should probably give this relevant tags now#undertale#undertale fan art#frisk#chara#player undertale#haha didn't know that was a tag#probably the original staging was more interesting but i didn't wanna draw them from behind lol#okay i'm done talking#actually no i'm not because i just noticed the player isn't looking at the fourth wall but both chara and frisk are (in the original)#did that mean something#did i mean something by that#i can't fathom/remember what i could've possibly meant but i like doing shit like that on purpose#so surely there was a reason
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i want top neuvillette who's still femme and a crybaby my god is that so hard
#/lh#my tastes. masc bottoms femme tops#to be fair my dynamic with them is neuv gets pregnant but neuv also tops. so generally speaking. solid switches. but wrio bottoms#he's the king of the underworld after all.#i do think its hilarious tho if you look at the trends across wrlt vs nvwr interpretations#the tops always gets broadened...... masculinized.... aged#and the bottom becomes this waifish wet noodle..........#like ive seen bottom wrio with a baby face. paired with a neuv who's somehow broader than him#and alternatively ive seen the. meatiest. manliest middle-aged man wriothesley with a neuvillette who's back is perpetually arched#and im like the dimorphism is crazy /j this isnt just a strictly wrlt thing tho this is real across. every ship. that has ever existed lol#tho on a more serious note i have a big squick when it comes to bottom wrio interps where an emphasis on their dynamic is........#the fact that he's younger. or that they first met when he was a minor. im like weird thing to emphasize but ok.#disclaimer tho when i say crybaby hes not a Childish Man mind you. hes Sensitive and Awkward but he's still got that weird ancient stalenes#his voice just wobbles sometimes. he often sound like hes at the verge of tears even if his face is perfectly flat#hes autistic like that#and the sole reason why wrio doesnt top That Much is because hes fuckin tired man. eepy. hes like my god neuv if you still wanna go at it#ur gonna have to take the reins. baby im tired.#something something freakish dragon strength and stamina#personally. my hcs are as such. neuvillette is very lean. almost uncannily long if i exaggerate it for funsies. hes slenderman coded. skinn#but you find no texture underneath his skin. you can't feel bones or muscles shift when he moves when you touch him#there's this exceptional discomfort when you see him lift something that looks much heavier than he should be able to manage#almost like his long fingers might impale it. like you are balancing something soft and fleshy on a nail. it doesn't feel secure#like if wriothesley held you. his arms would feel warm and solid. thick and supportive. whereas neuv's feels like it might dig into you#i could yap all day.
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my mom [not here but just, in general, very very frequently]: I didn't do christmas cards on time/ at all, I am SUCH a piece of SHIT, LMAO
her sister: you know I've often wondered if we're not all neurodivergent, which would explain everything 🤔 either way it's completely understandable and absolutely okay that you're doing the best with what you've got💕
#it's so funny how much of my shame is inherited from my mom loudly decrying herself constantly and without provocation lmao#my mom: haha look at us rocking back and forth like we're CRAZY lmaooo something's WRONG with us LOL#me who hadn't even noticed until that very moment that other people don't sway back and forth while standing still: wh. okay???#thanks for leaving me out of THAT insecurity until I was an adult and old enough to think you're being weird instead of absorbing it#my mom often does an... understandable thing that I also feel the reflex to do sometimes#which is acknowledge my shortcomings so people understand that I Know I'm being [shitty/ disappointing/ frustrating/ etc]#but man she does it SO much and leans on it SO hard with no concept of collateral damage#my mom: I forgot to do that thing because I'm a STUPID DIPSHIT ASSHOLE MORON. GOD. lol.#me who also forgets things and is unintentionally inconvenient and frustrating sometimes: ........ yeah#most of my 'you SHOULD Just Be Able To Do Thing and should be ashamed of yourself if you can't because it's EASY'#comes not from neurotypical people who don't get it but from my mom who feels the same way about herself :Ia#anyway I feel like there was another time on facebook that more clearly illustrated#this really specific dynamic of my mom going 'haha I also do that! because I'm stupid and terrible!'#and then my aunt commenting directly after her like 'I also do that! I think the whole family's Just Wired Differently and it's okay'#uh in unrelated news I don't even know if I'm gonna manage a card this year. I haven't started one :')#just being alive has been too overwhelming this season and it's really frustrating but whateverrrr#about me#posts from facebook
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