#i shall mourn you every day
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Can’t wait for 20 years from now when they release Toilet-Bound Hanako-Kun: Brotherhood
#manifesting this so hard#project restart you will be dearly missed#i shall mourn you every day#idc tho my hyperfixated brain sees new content and i start jumping for joy#we’re getting more content for aoi and her boyfriends guys i’m so excited#tbhk#toilet bound hanako kun#the difference here is that fma03 is still arguably one of the greatest pieces of media of all time#fma is just like that my dudes
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The Water You Drown
Pairing: Shadow! Azul Ashengrotto x Reader x Jade Leech
Summary: Your beloved husband has died, leaving you to be wedded to his friend due to a suspicious contract. No amount of insults seems to deter Jade from wiggling his affections into your every waking moment. In your grief, you miss Azul, but it seems his shadow misses you even more, doing whatever it takes to make you drown with him. [9k words]
Inspired by : @merakiui Shadow Azul & Morros fic!
Warnings: [ Yandere ], Kissing, Implied imprisonment, Contractual marriages, Regency Era, Tentacles, Harm to reader, Violent threats (To Jade), GN!Reader but there are references to pregnancy, All characters in their mid 20’s, Accusations of cheating, Mentions of nsfw, Desperate Reader, Unhealthy behaviors, Made up monster, Overblot Azul, Suggestive at the end, Some angst
You stand atop your once-alive husband, the pristine stone darkening with each raindrop that lands on its surface. Leaning down, your fingers gently trace over the letters with adoration, a sense of grief washing over you.
The rain is cold, but the feeling of mourning has always been even colder.
When you finish grazing the engravement, you draw a heart with your fingertip.
In loving Memory, Azul Ashengrotto, Beloved husband and friend
You slowly stand to your full height, dusting off dirt from your lap, you let the rain hit you, each droplet increasing in strength. Yet, you don’t have the will in you to cover yourself, deeply believing, or rather… hoping, that this rain is Azuls spirit reaching out to you from beyond the grave.
A gentle smile grazes your lips, yes, this must be him. He always insisted you visit the sea with him. You never did agree though, having duties to tend to day in and day out. But, you close your eyes, imagining each assault on your skin to be sea water splashing you.
This visage is broken when the rain suddenly pauses, a gentle hand finding its place on your shoulder. Gentle, yet you can’t help but find this man's touch akin to a rose’s thorn.
“It’s cold, perhaps you should find solace in our house, Mrs.Leech?” you don’t open your eyes, continuing to bask in the sound of hushed splashes. You allow for Jade's suggestion to go unanswered, your newly found fiance only laughing at the silence.
A fiance you never wished for. You were thrust into his possession due to Azuls will, a letter stating his last wish to be his right hand taking his place as your lover.
Why would he ever wish for such a thing? You thought he loved you, lavishing you in desires so sought over just to make you happy… Why would he ever promise you to such a… Deceitful man?
Yet, you can’t argue. The contract was composed entirely of Azuls writing, his signature only further instilling this truth.
“No, I should like to stay.” you finally peek through your eyelids, glancing at Jade before turning to his gloved limb, firmly swiping him off you, dusting the area off as if a pest had been there. But that’s not too far from the truth, is it?
“Is that so? But, it is cold. You will garner illness.”
“I said no, forgive me my lord but must you stay here? I wish for mourning towards my husband.”
“Dear, he is not your husband, I am. Surely,” he pauses, another one of his gratingly deep chuckles wafting the clean air, “You cannot be promised to a dead man.”
“He is not dead.” He is, but you won’t give him the satisfaction of giving up your beloved husband.
“I assure you, any man buried in the ground Is considered dead.” Jade continues, his smiling seeming ever continuous like his muscles have contracted to forever hold their shape.
“Ah, so you will be dead very soon, how wondrous!” you promised since Azuls death you would never smile for another man, but promises aren’t as binding as curses are they?
“If it is you who puts me under, I believe I’ll die a happy man.”
“… You have sullied this moment.”
“Don’t worry, I shall love you forevermore, even if you may have been ruined by another man.” his smile still doesn’t falter. If you could, you would jump at the chance to cut up his pretty face.
Alas, such wants can never be fulfilled because if it is true Azul wished for you to be with his… Right-hand man (Though you’re not too sure as Azul would complain about his unique persona day in and out) then… you should wish to be with Jade as well.
Because you love Azul. Ever since you were arranged to marry him. Well, at least you think that’s the case.
You reply to his retort with but a sigh, turning back to look solemnly at the words etched into stone, a cruel reminder of the man you once had.
Jade sticks his arm out, signaling you to interlock yours with his own, but this act is met with a huff. Your shoes click against the pavement as you speed away, uncaring for the rain that falls into your eyes, the liquid only further covering the tears you’ve shed.
It has only been a few months, but you can tell it will feel like centuries.
You endlessly toss and turn in the sheets of your bed, the unnerving hand of the slimy man… no eel. He must be one with how slimy he is curling around your waist. He’s pulling you in with a strength so ironclad you can’t pull away.
It’s unfortunate when you get home from the cemetery, the separate bed you had arranged in a room far far away from Jades, had been mysteriously tossed away. Jade claims a peg must’ve been lost, as when he came home the mattress had been tilted.
It’s a lie, you checked your bedding the morning of and no such thing existed.
”Am I some sort of commodity? Why won’t this man unhand me...?!” You’re sure this leech is awake, you haven’t been whispering any of your words.
You stop fighting his grasp, only loosely relaxing in his hold, yet not at all. Your eyes are fixated on one object, and one object alone.
A shell necklace made of pure gold.
Its light glimmers in the dark, a stark contrast to the everlasting black you find yourself in.
Soft snores finally begin to resonate through your room, a signal to Jade's final slumber. But, you’ve lost all will to escape him, you’re too tired and grieved to do such a thing. It’s only when you blink do you realize you still have tears left to cry.
“Azul…” Your words are hushed, so much so not even a mouse could hear your pleas. “Why must you have gone to sea… Was I not equal to the worth of land you bought?” your fingers reach up to wipe your tears, before pausing.
The necklace is no longer there.
The shock must’ve been the reason you needed to break free from Jade, as the sight immediately has you breaking his arms apart with a newfound determination.
It’s improper to bed out of bed with your sleepwear only, but you do not care, at this point, you’d much be naked than without that necklace.
“Are you looking for something? I believe I had all of Azuls stuff moved to a storage building of mine.” What? How would he even know you were looking for…? It doesn’t matter.
“No, I lost… Never mind go back to sleep you rake.”
“I believe I am plenty married.” He leans up from the bed, the blanket falling off and revealing his bare torso.
“Is that so? I feel horrible for your spouse.”
“Self-pity isn’t good for one’s health.” You scoff at his words before lighting a candle, not daring to answer his obvious jabs at your conscience. You leave the room without a sound, wandering the halls of the newfound house you find yourself in.
Each wall looks the same, obnoxiously elegant. At this rate, you’ll never find the whereabouts of that—
A quick shadow passes your peripherals, a gust of wind blowing your nightwear into the air, and in turn, the light of your candle.
“Who’s there? If it’s you, Floyd, I already told you I don’t want to wed you, and neither did I wish to be wedded to Jade!” No answer, only the sound of slimy liquid splashing.
Slimy liquids?
You turn the corner quickly, not even bracing yourself for whatever possible sight could appear. Yet, your lack of awareness is lucked out, all that’s left is a golden coin, one part of Azul's special collection. There was nothing special about it however, if anything, it is one of the few antiques that are essentially worthless.
But he found riches in the sole pence simply because you picked it up, claiming it to be luck.
You lean down with your fingers, picking the coin up with a certain care. It is still as pretty as the day you found it.
“Mine.” The voice immediately makes your shoulders tense, not daring to look back at its owner. The voice is aquatic, a certain echo sounding like the creature is underwater.
Should you run? Do you run? All these suggestions that should be commands run rampant through your mind, but the feeling of a wet tentacle wrapping its suction cups around your waist halts all ideas.
“Mine. You have something that is mine.” The coin, it must be the coin. You don’t turn your head, keeping your eyes pinned on the imaginary target on your floors. You lift your hand, the pence wedged between your fingers.
“Here, it’s…” you realize something. This piece… Your necklace is gone, who knows where it’s gone? This antique, you must keep it. “Not yours.”
“I wasn’t talking about the coin,” The voice that comes out this time is not nearly as echoed, the sound coming out the clearest it’s ever been. “Angelfish.”
It can’t… not it’s not…! But what if it…?
You look down at the dark shadow matter that holds your waist, a second one coming to wrap around your thighs underneath your nightwear. No… your Azul was never a shadow…!
“My husband was… is human, you can not be him.” The tentacles increase their grip on your skin.
“Don’t say such mean things dear, you’ll hurt my feelings.” It’s only when the feeling of hair tickling your face, and a pair of real hands wrap around your waist in tandem with the tentacles, do you smell something so familiar.
Sea salt.
Your head finally turns around, your eyes making contact with the man you’ve missed so much.
“Azul.” He looks different, no… He is different. There are faint traces of purple on his transparent body. Several tentacles flail about behind him, all seeming to have a mind of their own. But the most noticeable thing is his change in size, he’s practically three times bigger than before.
Yet, you think it’s Azul.
“My, is my charm still as captivating as it was when we wedded?” it takes you a while to register the fact you're feet are no longer touching the ground, your bottom half cold and wet as you sit on his thick tendrils. “I hope so, you’re still just as incomparable.”
You feel yourself struggle in balance with the continuous moving of his muscles, your hands finding refuge on his neck as you hug him tightly, the fear of falling being your sole reason.
“Azul, I do not wish to perish so soon…! Please… please put me down…!”
“So you can return to your new half?” there’s a certain firmness in his voice when he replies, a tone that was previously not there. “Have you moved on so quickly? I am still here and alive if you can’t see.” those words… Does this false image of Azul believe you to be baggage?
“Pardon? I know not what you speak. I have never exchanged whispers with that… that…! Conniving eel!”
“Calm down dear, I know that. You would never.”
“Yes, I would never.” you parrot. But, there’s a certain ache that is realized inside you, taking the form of an even bigger pain when you utter the words you say. “But, I must return soon.”
“You said you wouldn’t.”
“I never said that.” It’s the unfortunate truth, to have to tuck yourself back into the bedside of a man you don’t love. It makes you wonder though, why did he jump to marrying you?
You’re not broke, if you were, your marriage to Azul would’ve never come to be. But, you’re not rich either. If rumors you’ve heard hold truth, Jade was meant to marry someone with far greater wealth than you.
So why…?
“I see,” Azul utters with hushed breath. You sigh with relief, ready to thank him with the happiest of smiles.
“Thank you. Do not worry I shall return Azul—“
“No.”
…
Huh?
Transparent tendrils grow behind him, swiftly making their way towards your face. The suction cups gently graze your cheek before pulling away, confusion evident on your face. His face is dark, not from the shadows that shroud him, the expression on his face.
A blissful smile.
The last thing you feel is the hardwood against your head.
The lone duke reaches to his side, his hands groggily searching for the body of his dearly, though you wouldn’t agree, beloved. His eyes peek open when there’s nothing to grasp.
He wakes to an empty bedside, but he’s more so bothered by the lack of a warm body in his arms. Have you not returned from your midnight excursion? How interesting, he recalls a distant (not at all distant, in truth, only yesterday) memory of your preference to sleep as much as possible.
“Why must you wake me so early? I prefer staying in slumber to never see your horribly handsome face.”
“Oh? You think me handsome?”
“Unfortunately, but it’s all the better when I smuggle that pretty accessory with a pillow.”
“My my, please wait till we have an heir in you.”
“… I despise how you turn my acts of violence into such crude subjects.”
He upturns from the bed, groggily blinking with exhaustion only you’ve been present to witness. It’s one of the few moments he’s unguarded and not accompanied by a cunning smile.
He looks out the window and realizes, it’s still night, but the coming of day emerges with the lightening blue sky. He can’t help but wonder, where are you?
You could be downstairs, preparing food for yourself (You never did enjoy tasking his servants despite their willingness to assist you.), or maybe you’ve taken a stroll in his gardens. No, that’s not it… you claim his mushrooms to be a disturbing sight (He knows you’re only saying that to attack his heart. He sees you secretly tending to the fungi when he does not have the chance.).
Or perhaps you’ve run away. He certainly can’t have that.
He throws the covers off, walking to his closet, and allowing his naked torso to be covered with a dress shirt. He opens his door, a vigor in his lighting. This determination extinguishes when he spots you on the floor, your nightwear disheveled with circular bruises imprinted on your skin.
His lithe frame slows him to reach you in a few steps, scooping your unconscious body into his arms effortlessly. A low whisper sounds from behind him, threatening yet the way the voice trails is akin to a corrupt spirit.
“Jade… You…” He turns, his mismatched eyes locking with the vicinity he heard it from. But there’s nothing to be seen, only a pathetically desolate corner of the room.
At least, that’s what he’ll tell you. He knows he won’t ever mention to you the dark shadow that glares at him from a corner before disappearing.
He can’t help but feel that envied voice sounding much too familiar to his late friend.
It’s been a week since you last saw the shadow that calls itself your Azul.
You’re conflicted on whether he’s telling the truth and he is indeed your late husband who’s come from beyond the grave. He has the coin he’s always treasured. It’s the same one, down to the tiny scratches on its surface.
You know it’s not just your thoughts playing tricks on you either, the dark marks on your thighs and arms are proof enough.
You’re not sure when Jade found you, but you’re sure it’s when he found you, that “Azul” had disappeared. Is he perhaps a creature only you can see? No matter how much you ask Jade about what he saw, he refuses to divulge any details to you.
Goodness, you’ve even stooped to bargaining and begging! Entirely unbefit to someone in your position.
“Please. You must. I beg of you.”
“Your pleas are far sweeter than any wine I’ve tasted.” You wince at his words, stressing your face to not show any signs of distaste.
“… I will willingly stroll the town with you.”
“I see. I agree to your terms.” For once, and the only time, you smile at Jade, taking his hands in yours and lifting them to your cheek with the countenance of a true lover rather than an arranged one.
“So what do you know from the night of? Did you witness it? Hear it? You must tell me!”
“I know nothing. There was only a bug.” You roughly throw his hands away from your body, brushing him off like a leech.
“I wish to be married to the man who was courting me before you. Can I? It must not be too late.” Riddle, a bright suitor. He was kind to you. You like him much more than this man.
“Ah, Rosehearts, a fine choice. Unfortunately, you’re not wealthy enough for his mother, and married, twice.” You slouch back in your chair, a form utterly lacking in grace. All the servants will be sure to whisper of your strained relationship with the Duke.
“At this point, the Leech family will have to use that mad twin of his for an heir, the Floyd mister. Those two will never consummate…”
A sudden clatter of plates catches both of your focus, your heads turning in unison to look at the shattered porcelain on the ground. You’re unsure if Jade catches it, but the faint trace of shadow tells you exactly who caused the ruckus.
“You’re unbearable countenance has left me ill. I’m taking my leave.” For once, Jade doesn’t reply to you with a witty comeback. This shift makes you wonder if you should be more worried about that rather than “Azul”, but you refrain from asking.
You sneak away from Jade's grasp in the night, closing the door with a silence that seems impossible. The lights are the only illumination besides the moon's rays.
“Azul? Are you here? I’m… not mad about last time. Please come out to me.”
Silence.
You clasp your hands, sitting on the cold flooring of the house, a shiver going down your spine. A makeshift protest it is, you will sit here for hours until this thing reveals itself to you.
“You never liked it when I slept. So, I shall dream right here” You feel foolish for this display. Not even so much as a tentacle reaches out to you. Are you doing this for nothing? Is there no point—
A sudden tendril emerges from the wall behind you, finding its place on your waist before the rest of them takes hold of other parts of your body. Your weight is once again lifted in the air, cradled in a heap of muscle.
“Shall I help you wake?”
So his words are lies. This is not the Azul you know and love. Even in moments where he struggled to pass into dreams, he always made an effort to lull you to bed.
…
“Azul… It’s okay. The servants are sleeping, we shouldn't disturb them.” You rub your heavy eyes, and despite their weight, they just can’t allow you to sleep peacefully, even in the comfort of your mattress. You lean up, ready to leave the bed.
“Then I’ll serve you tonight.” your husband's voice is soft as if he isn't nearly as tired as you. No… he’s even more exhausted. He can hide it but you’ve engraved his being into your soul. Azul follows in your wake, the blanket falling down his form as he leans on his elbows.
Plus, he tends to snack late at night when he can’t sleep. The several tiny empty plates tell you all you need to know.
“That’s unneeded.” you place your hand on his chest, tenderly laying him back onto the bedding.
“Most needed.” he grabs your hand and sits back up again. “Seeing you well is a comfort. You want me to sleep as well right? I’ll only do so if you fall first.” truly… your husband is much too clingy.
…
Despite the hue of night outside your window, the harsh hail that drops from the sky reminds you of your entrapment. If you could leave this beast, would you even be able to leave this house?
This version of Azul has closed the distance between you two, his glowing cerulean eyes staring deep into yours. You’d confuse the hand that cups your cheek for Azuls if it wasn’t so cold.
“I was kidding angelfish, I could never allow you to harm yourself in such a way.” You’re able to control your face despite the shock. So then is he your Azul or not? It’s too late when you finally look to the side. Grotesque tentacles surround you from all sides, essentially trapping you to the floor.
But the thought of Azul distracts you from the impending danger. You should care, you really should in the scenario this isn’t your husband. But the tiny sliver of hope that emerges feeds into your delusions.
“Don’t cry.” You didn’t know you were. Azul hushes your sniffles, petting your head as he brings you into his chest. “There will be no tears for you to shed when we leave here.” Neither do you know what he speaks of, but you nod, eager to fall into the arms of your husband.
He lifts your head from his body, the lone smile he reserved for you especially, adorning his shadowed lips. The closer you look at it though, it doesn’t quite reach his eyes, neither do they look genuine.
But you don’t mind. This is your Azul, it must be. No false intimidation of him could ever care for you with such adoration.
He leans in without your notice, his freezing lips only inches away from yours.
“We will leave this horrible house together.” His grip is tight, but does that matter? The ink that bleeds into your skin in all but a warm embrace.
…
Ink?
You’re about to turn your head down to look at the liquid, but before you can a strong grip holds onto your cheeks, squishing The fat together. Azul's forehead is rested on yours, the smile held for you no longer on his face, but rather the one for his clients. A smug smile of scheming.
“I promised I'd help you wake up—”
The sound of doors slamming open immediately draws his attention. He looks between you and the source of the sound, his face contorted with annoyance. His face quickly leans into yours, ready to enact the once-tender act of love. The sight of a light distracts him, a silent tut leaving him before disappearing into the shadows.
Your breaths are heavy at the release of pressure on your face. Your hands can barely hold up your body weight, they’re practically about to give up on themselves.
“Shrimpy? Whatcha doin’ on the floor.” it's been so long since you’ve seen Floyd, that you almost confused him for Jade, save for the unique manner of speech he has. It stands out among those in proper society. But it doesn’t matter.
You jump up from your place on the floor, hugging him with a swiftness you shouldn’t be so eager to do. But truthfully, if this was Jade you’re sure you would’ve hugged him just as tight, which is why it’s for the best it was Floyd and not him. Anyone but him.
“What? You excited to see me? What do yah say to ditchin’ Jade and kissin’ me stead’ yeah?” his firm arm wraps around you, picking you up with ease to spin you around. It may be night but with him around it must be the lightest it could possibly be. “Is what he would’ve said had he been here.” Your arms immediately fall at the tone shift.
You’ve been deceived, this is Jade.
You pinch his cheek from the vulnerable state he saw you in, a part of yourself you refused to ever bless him with. Even then… it’s hard to get out of his hold, he’s practically trying to merge with your own body.
“Do you take pride in watching me panicked? A very unfit trait for a husband…” you grit your teeth, but he continues to hold you like an ever-so-fawning husband. Even the way he grazes your face with the back of his hand is tender. He must be mocking you.
“No… Perhaps. But I do take pride in watching you live.”
“Then pretend I’m dead.”
“Then, I shall be the prince in the story who kisses you awake from that deep slumber.” You’re reaching to tug at the annoying asymmetric strand of hair on his head, but pause when the sight of cerulean eyes stare back at you from the shadows. The corner of the hall is desolate from the light of Jade's lamp, entirely untouched and untainted by its purity.
You’re about to point out the existence of the fiend to Jade but stop just shy when a familiar sight invades Azuls fingers.
The golden conch necklace. Its sheen glows despite the shadows.
The piece is just as beautiful as the day it was gifted to you. The face behind the jewelry, however, is much different. Rather than jovial at his present like before, a shadow overcasts his face, everything invisible except for his lone glowing irises.
“Is something the matter?” Jade tilts his head, his face ready to turn before you stop him. It’s a disgustingly affectionate act to hold his face in your hands, but it’s a must. “Oh my…”
“Let's go to sleep.”
“Are you ill? This is the first you’ve ever been willing. My…” Jade feigns worry as he rests his hand on your forehead. “Well, it’s only standard for me to care for you.” You swat your hand at him in response, yet an ironclad hold doesn’t set you free from him.
“Don’t test it.” He smiles, and you’re sure he’s about to open his mouth and annoy you. Seconds go by in silence, his large frame sticking his elbow out, pleasantly proving you wrong.
You take a single glance back, the octopus of shadows no longer sat in the lonely corner, only empty space. You hope when you turn around Jade and his jovial countenance will be gone from sight. You’re unfortunately proven—
… Right?
You slowly turn your head, looking in every direction for where your husband could’ve possibly disappeared. To no avail, there’s only air where he once occupied.
“Jade?” Since when did the manor become so cold? Your arms rub your skin, finding a way to save your body heat. The lack of response is only a further panic, he never does shut up. But even then, you’re starting to miss the grating silky voice he has.
You step forward, the floor is cooler than it was just a few moments ago. And… It’s wet too; it’s covered in a layer of seawater, bits of seaweed, and small fish floating in the body of liquid.
“… Azul?” there’s a faint hiccup that echoes through the hall, a sound you’re unfamiliar with. Well, sorta. This tone sounds familiar but you’ve…
It sounds like Azul, but you’ve never heard him cry before. Was he ever capable of that? He was more suave when courting you. Even during your marriage.
You drag your feet through the water, your nightwear wetting itself with each movement. You allow the weeping to guide your way, getting closer and closer to its source.
You were right.
You turn the corner and are greeted by the giant octopus, hunched over in a corner. His tentacles wave the water around, causing waves to form; all of them hitting you back with every attempt you make to get closer.
“Azul…! Whatever are you…?!” Despite the dark cloak of shadow covering his face, his eyes peak between the fingers enveloping his face.
“Do you love Jade now?” The hollow tone in his voice conflicts with the looks in his pupils. Pure envy. You don’t answer his question. But, this is entirely your fault. You’re not silent because it’s the truth. You’re quiet because how could this creature with your husband's face think such a thing?
“Azul… That’s not—…!” You’re not given the choice to retort when the feeling of cold-soaked fingers covers your mouth. Even with the distance he didn’t use those tentacles. Though you’re relieved he didn’t; the way they thrash around in the water tells you if he did, you wouldn’t have the chance to reply to him.
You’re ready to claw your upper half away from him, but pause when the sounds of wheezed laughs leave him. Another thing you don’t remember Azul ever doing.
Just further proof, this thing only has his face. No part of your true husband resides in him.
Or… maybe it’s the opposite. Maybe Azul was always like this.
“Ahaa… Ahh…haa…!” His pupils dilate at the last exhale, pulling you into him with a force that crashes your head into his chest, “Even here you fall for him.” His arms wrap around you, the hug much more tender than the suction cups that curl around your bottom half. “It’s okay… I still love you, much more than Jade.”
What is he talking…?
You don’t realize the way the air in your lungs dissipates, the water rising with each second, further engulfing you in his overwhelming obsessions. Not affection, obsession.
Your Azul would never drown you like this.
“…You can’t be Jades if you’re mine first.” It’s too late to get out of his hold now. The sea is much too terrifying when it’s around you. You don’t feel air in your lungs, but you don’t suffocate, if anything, you can’t suffocate. “It’s okay angelfish,” His voice is muffled, fingers steadily crawling up your neck until his finger reaches your lips, resting his forehead on yours, “Your husband shall care for you now, not that eel.”
Tears well in your eyes, but not from the pain. It’s from this thing saying such sweet things to you. You have to keep telling yourself… This man isn’t Azul. It’s not… You have to come to terms…!
Azuls mouth connects to yours, bubbles escaping you from the contact. He continues to exchange his affection into your lips, greedily quaffing your air like it’s his, his to breathe in.
It’s not how your husband kissed you, he kissed you with a gentleness akin to a flower. He’s kissing you as if he intends to swallow you whole, not allowing your love to be anyone elses.
Yet, a moment passes and you’re returning each kiss with a fever.
He’s not Azul. It’s not Azul. It’s not your Azul. Azul. Azul…!
In some miracle, you break your arms out of his tentacle hold, wrapping those freed limbs around him. You don’t notice the way you’re not even breathing anymore, too focused on each lipped exchange you have with Azul.
“Now Jade can’t have you. You’ve been ruined.” You were always ruined, ever since he left. Even now as you act so indulgently with the creature with Azuls face, you’ve been ruined.
But you know Jade wouldn’t care.
“You and Azul acted on your wedding night? Oh, dear… Hm? You thought me to be worried? Oh my, it’s quite the opposite… Why…? Well simply put, I’ll show you how much better I am.”
“We will drown together angelfish.”
It doesn’t matter. This thing is the closest to Azul you’ll ever be again, you have to savor it…—!
A tiny ray of light shines through the murky water, hitting Azul right in the eye. He falls back, clutching his eye, hissing through swollen lips. Your falls back into the water, a moment of stupor clouding your judgment before swimming away. What could’ve done that to him?
And what made you wish to stay?
You turn around, curious about the purification that suddenly hit him, and with it, your common sense. You were… indulging a demon. A shadow.
Your eyes glance at the projection, a window, stunningly showcasing the sun-rise that emerges. Azul continues to hiss, his ghostly form fizzing in the water. In a last-ditch effort, he extends his arm to you, his other limbs seemingly unconscious as they lay still.
But before he reaches you, your eyes flutter shut. Oxygen is no longer your savior, but perhaps a cross might be better.
A hand grabs onto your shoulder.
Your body feels dry, warm if anything. It must be the candles Jade has lit around you. Even then, perhaps you never were in the water to begin with. The sight of a soft blue invades your vision. Right, your shared bedroom with the leech.
“Do be careful, it makes no good for your recovery if you continue to act like a fish out of water.” Jade's body emerges from the door, long legs striding over to take his spot next to your bed.
“Jade…” There’s a certain tenderness in your voice that makes him tense, but he resumes as if it never happened.
“Your voice sounds sweet. Perhaps I should keep you bedridden all the time.” He’s back to being coy. But you don’t have the energy to keep up. He stays silent when you do. He knows something’s wrong with the way your eyes stare longingly, even more so when you take his gloved hand like you would a lover.
He knows there’s something wrong, yet he can’t bring himself to do anything. If he did, you wouldn’t return his affections like you are right now, would you? Plus, why ever would he wish to shorten such a sight, you never let him this close.
You never let him look into your eyes for too long. They’re a beautiful enchanting hue, he wishes you’ll let them see them more often.
On your face of course. Though, if things ever become drastic, a jar wouldn’t be a bad option either.
…
You think you wanna run away. Far from here, you know it will follow through, forevermore you’re sure.
That thing, it dared to take advantage of you and implement fond memories, make you believe it was Azul. Monsters are horrific, but liars are much crueler.
“Jade you have other estates to live in, correct?”
“I do.” He rubs his thumb over your skin.
“Allow us to sanction ourselves there then”
“You can’t flee from a shadow dear.”
“… I… What are you speaking about…? Jade?” He doesn’t reply, only allowing his prophecy to implement itself into your veins. You shake his arm, attempting to make him spill more of his nonsense, but he doesn’t. He only smiles at you before gently taking your hand and placing a kiss on your bare skin.
He leaves the room with more questions asked than answered.
“Jade Leech…!” Your voice comes out gurgled, bubbles popping out rather than air. “…?!”
Salt water stings your vision, but in the tiny blear you have, something odd swims in front of the portrait at your feet. A large painting forcibly commissioned by Jade, where you’re sat on a throne adorned with different seashells and coral. That’s the only good thing about the portrait, for that throne was something of Azuls that you pressured Jade into letting you keep.
Your pupils trail down Jade's figure, reaching his hips, where a shadow covers his legs, making his limbs look to be one long tail.
…
The eel swims away the moment you start analyzing it.
You jump up from the bed, your blanket floating aimlessly in the air as you swim toward the painting, taking hold of the golden frame adorning its edges. Your fingers tighten their grip on the intricate detailing at your newfound findings.
There’s a faint reflection of grey hair in the decor of your chair.
You’re about to punch a hole through the canvas, already working to raise your fist at the cloth. When you finally throw your limb, you’re only stopped by knuckle meeting solid gold.
Limbs wrap around the string of the conch necklace, dark purple, accompanied by the feeling of a cheek nuzzling into your own.
“I found where Jade left this.” Any chance of fleeing is already taken from you, as tentacles grab hold of your legs. When you turn you’re met by Azul, a much softer look than what he had when you last saw him. “Mm, I’m sorry, Angelfish. I didn’t mean it, I would never truly hurt you.”
How is he back again?
You continue to only stare at the beastly version of your husband. No… your ex-husband, for Azul, is no longer in the land of the living.
And this pathetic replication of him will never live up to your true Azul.
“Won’t you forgive me?” he trails kisses up your neck when you fail to smile at him, or even touch him. “I found your gift, I hope you still like it.” He rocks you in the water, a familiar action Azul would do in private.
You reply minimally, only nodding along with whatever nonsense he spouts, all for you to understand the only questions in your mind.
What is this fiend? And how does it continue to appear in your home?
These two questions only continue to eat away at you with each twirl in the water. Truthfully, this seems like a scene you could only dream of, it’s so soft and so pretty. But you can’t bring yourself to enjoy the moment.
Your thoughts stop when you feel The mid-water waltz come to a halt. The grasp on your legs tightens once more, as he dips you down, forehead finding refuge on yours.
“Are you ready to leave now?” You choke on water.
No… No…!
“It seems we are, let's go then, Angelfish.” The cruel copy of Azul smiles lovingly at you while you struggle in his hold, air bubbles popping out your throat as you try to scream underwater.
You’d die… You’d rather die than destroy Azul's love for you by eloping with this evil tempter.
How…? How?! How in bloody hell do you rid yourself of him?!
Shadow-made tendrils begin to make their way across your vision, covering any chance of a plan you have. Despite your struggle, he shushes you like one would comfort a child.
You’re starting to feel your conscience fade away into his palms, your defeat inevitable.
Until you feel your curtains graze your fingers. Your hand weakly grabs a handful of the fabric. Will you even be able to pull this giant thing off? You can barely move…!
Despite your reservations, you try. You feel his thumb trace over your lips, a single tap acting like a kiss.
…
You bite his thumb.
He jumps back, still holding you. But, it’s enough force for you to yank the curtain down, light quickly stabbing its way through the water. The rays puncture his purple skin, his eyes widening as he quickly tries to drag you back into him. In his weakened state, the moment he pulls you close enough, you kick your legs into his stomach, pushing yourself away from him.
“No…! No! You didn’t! [Name]! Come back here! COME BACK!”
You swim as quickly as you can to the door, busting through its hinges. You don’t look back to see if he’s gone or not.
…
That only worked because it was day. You didn’t even know if there was sun.
“Jade…?” you stand up on trembling legs, looking around the vast halls of his estate. “Jade?!” You sound pathetic right now, but you need him.
It’s the only way you won’t die by that thing's hands.
“Jade—?!” your desperation finally begins to seep through, each shout of his name dripping with fear. You’re on the verge of tears with your last ask. “Jade, where the bloody hell are you—?!”
“I’m right here.” your head turns towards his voice. ”My, are you a masochist dear? It does seem like you enjoy pain much more than anyone else in society—” You run up to him, willingly letting yourself envelop him in a hug, pulling his neck towards you as your arms wrap around him.
“Jade… Don’t leave again.” You’ve forgotten his last statement before he left, the rage no longer resides in you for that. For a moment, Jade's hand hovers over you, before he finally allows himself to indulge.
“I do hope this is not another attempt at subduing me with your affection.”
“Are you saying if I tried that it might work?”
“Unfortunately, not might, would.” You don’t reply to him, only tightening your wrap around his figure. You wonder why he doesn’t question the fact you are soaked in salt water.
“When you asked me not to leave you again, I do admit, I thought you would be following me around rather than me pursuing you.” your fingers flip through dust pages as Jade sits at your side. He wouldn't dare to annoy you so heavily this time, for it’s the first time you've let him sit only a few inches away from you. So close he can hear each breath you make.
It’s lovely.
“Well, if you have an issue I can always request Floyd to come over. He looks enough like you that I can pretend he is you.” Jade smiles through his pointed teeth, opening his mouth to retort before you cut him off,” Though, I already like him much more, so I don’t believe I have to.” You don’t look at him, but you smile knowing Jade’s once sadistic smile has become much more strained.
“Was it not you who begged me not to go?” It’s your turn to strain a smile. “It was like a sweet delicacy to my ears, much better than any cries from a brothel.”
“Ha, do you wish me to accompany you to such an obscenity? I do regret to inform you that I am not that kind of spouse.”
“Well then, it’s good I don’t wish to act on such desires, for they’re all reserved for you and you exclusively.“ you roll your eyes at your husband, ready to reply to such a tempting statement. You pause when your eyes scan over the words you’ve been looking for.
Ombre: A shadowed figure that resides with those of the recently grieving. They appear to manifest through the belongings of the departed. There have been some cases where all items are gone but the beast remains. These are especially heinous for they can be entirely regular humans. Though, for a majority, your best chance of purification is to rid yourself of such objects.
…
Your fingers snake around the golden conch at your neck, your eyes furrowing at the writing. For a moment, you look down at the surface, the shine glimmering in the light.
For a moment, only a single moment, you can see Azul in its reflection. A cruel reminder of the love who gave you something so near to your heart.
…
You grab Jade's gloved fingers, mismatched eyes staring intently at the way you take hold of him. His face leans in, his forehead pressed on yours… You bring his hand to your chest, wrapping his fingers around Azuls necklace, tightening his grip. You allow him to continue resting his head on yours.
If you close your eyes, you can pretend he’s Azul. So, you close your eyes.
“Please…” you whisper, soft, so soft not even the dust in the air could hear you, but only Jade. “Azul, save me.”
Jade stays silent at the name you say. His free gloved hand finds itself on your cheek, wiping away the tear that trails down your face. You don’t see him take his thumb and lick the salt from your cries.
“Of course I will, Angelfish.”
Your cries increase with the sound of each crack resonating at your chest. Before you, your beloved parting gift from Azul is but golden shards and memories.
You finally open your eyes, ready to collect each piece to melt and send them far away. You’re met by Jade still pressing himself against you, not Azul.
“This is the part where you tell me I’m heinous, to get off you before I sully your clothes with my slimy countenance.” He hopes you’ll tell him to get off, to leave before the sensation of his supposed heart beating in his chest kills him.
“I’ll move when you do, Jade.” his inhale gets caught in his throat. The feeling of consuming you whole embeds itself into him, hands reaching out to wrap themselves around you.
They stop when he sees the way you look at the broken necklace.
…
Jade removes himself from your comfort, grabbing a pot and delicately plucking each one from your skin.
“It seems it’s time to gift Floyd. I’m sure he’ll be overjoyed at the knowledge it’s from you.” you look down at the broken conch once more, before nodding.
You turn back and forth in your bed, Jade sleeping peacefully right next to you despite your unrest. You’ve ridden yourself of almost every single gift and belonging you’ve still retained of Azuls.
Except one.
The damned antique coin of Azuls.
You throw the covers off, taking candlelight in hand. Truly… where could it have gone? You glance back at Jade, still slumbering completely fine in your bed.
It’s when you think back to your first meeting with that thing, do you remember where it is.
In the darkest corner of Jade’s estate.
The only good thing is that it’s a mere few feet away from your bedroom. You turn towards your doors, your forehead resting on its wood. The flame from the candle you hold flickers, a symbol of your wavering fear.
If you don’t get that coin, who knows when that ombre will decide to reappear again?
Your hands linger on the doorknob, a moment of hesitation striking you. You push through this fear, turning the handle and swinging the door open, the force blowing your clothes.
The false Azul is at the end of the hallway.
You shut the door swiftly, the slam resonating through your ears as you barricade the door with your body.
“Bloody hell— Jade! Jade wake up—!” you’re no longer met with the sight of your bed, neither Jade. Only a curtainless window allowing the light of the moon in,
And your dead husband's shadow.
“I love you.” its face no longer holds remnants of the love it showed before, completely expressionless as it looks down at you. The light from the moon backdrops it, the only light coming from its body being its eyes.
Its entirely shadow, the only part of Azul left in it being his eyes, and that hoarse voice.
“You…! You’re not Azul… Stop defacing him!”
The shadow moves its tentacles, scooting closer to your form. You can see a glint on its face, tear streaks.
“Do you love Jade now? Is that why you don’t love me anymore, Angelfish?” it slowly inches forward, and you bury yourself even further into the wood. You’re about to reply to such an accusation before spying on a familiar glint buried in the coral on its shoulder.
Azuls antique coin. You need it.
“… I could never love Jade.” you move off the door, “If… If you’re really my Azul, please,” you slowly walk to the shadow, putting on your best face, “proof to me that you're the man I love.”
It sits on the floor, opening its arms like Azul once did when he wanted you to sit with him, “that’s one thing… What else, Azul?” you walk over to it, placating it as you sit in its lap.
You slowly inch your arms up its torso, waiting for its next move.
“Angelfish, tell me if there’s anything you want, I shall get you it with a snap of my finger.” its arms wrap around your waist, pulling you into it. “After all, I'd do anything if it meant your happiness.” You successfully wrap your arms around its neck, plucking the coin from its shoulder.
“I wish for a puppy. Those little things are truly adorable.”
“Ah, they quite are aren’t they?” its fingers playfully trace up your spine, its face adorning the smile it must’ve practiced dozens of times. “Do you know what I wish for my love?“ you prepare yourself to rip from his hold and make a dash for the window.
There’s a river near this window, if you throw this coin there, the current can carry it away.
“What Azul?”
“For you to stop believing me to be so foolish.” Its smile quickly falls, throwing you to the door, far from your current objective. You grip the coin so hard, you fear it will embed itself into your palm, but it's better than losing it. ”Truly, am I that hideous the idea of leaving with me is unfathomable?!” its tentacles wave around the room in a rampage. You stand up, ready to run to the door with whatever it takes.
“No…! You have my Azuls face…!” You run through the swing of each appendage. “You could never be ugly in my eyes because of it!” You’re only a few feet away from the window, mere feet from removing this falsified version of Azul.
You’re met with the feeling of a slimy body blocking your path, a suffocating hug halting your path.
No…! No!
“It doesn’t matter if you hate me, I’ll always love you.” you’re so close… So close! “It doesn’t matter anymore, you’ll find your love for me again when we leave this place.”
Love.
“We’re leaving now, no matter what you convince me with—” You bury your lips into its own, those eyes widening at the feeling. You back it up with each exchange of your lips, caging it between you and the window. It’s too caught up in the way you kiss it, to notice your arm raising the coin.
It looks down at you when you part for air, staring deeply into your eyes, a trail of black ink connecting your lips.
It finally notices when you smile at it, a smile filled with the purest of love, for a man in your past.
“I love you, Azul.” you chuck the coin into the river, the water dragging it far into the ocean.
“No—!”
You watch as its form disperses into a cloud of black dust, the last action it takes is to reach out for you.
For a moment, you see its face take on the true appearance of your husband, smiling at you.
The wind drags the ebony sand out the window, leaving you stranded in your room alone.
“Azul…”
…
The light peaks through the tree's leaves, shining on Azul as he checks his books.
“My, it seems my husband is having an affair with money…! How cruel, and you always told me I mattered much more.” you laugh at your words as Azul rolls his eyes at you, opening his mouth as you feed him.
“Yes Angel, it’s because you matter much more to me that I do this, how else will I keep you happy?” He pushes up his glasses as you wrap yourself around his arm, resting your cheek on his shoulder.
“Hmm… Perhaps take me out more often?”
“Oh? Is three outings a sennight not enough for you? Greedy greedy.” he tuts at you as you laugh.
“I’m greedy? Seems quite hypocritical from a businessman, hm?” he smiles at you before planting a kiss on your temple.
“Yes, greedy for you.” he shuts his book as he turns to face you. “When I die, I'm sure I'll be desperate for you even after death.” his hands hold your face in his palms.
“Don’t say such things! You’re going to send yourself to an early grave…!” he doesn't answer, only smiling at you.
…
You look down at Azuls grave, placing a bouquet of irises on his tomb.
“See you soon Azul.”
You turn back to Jade, his arm sticking out to guide you back home. He smiles when you take hold of him, talking about your day.
You knock down the books on the table as Jade places you on his desk, his lips bite marks into your neck.
“I won’t be able to return to society if you keep this up, Leech.” His hands trace up your sides as he removes his teeth from your neck, licking a stripe up your skin before burying his lips into your own. He’s so greedy with each kiss like he’s attempting to consume your love all for himself.
What’s left of it anyway.
“Perhaps that’s what I want, yes? To have you all by yourself in this home…” A string of saliva connects you two at the moment. When he thinks you’ve breathed enough, he traces his canines on your lip, biting the plush skin before reconnecting yourselves. You fall against his desk, his gloved hand wrapping your leg around his.
“Possessive, I don’t like that in men, unfortunately.” he laughs at your words, rubbing circles into your hips.
“Yes, then perhaps I should drop dead—”
“Jaaade.” you both stand up at the call, Floyd wandering the halls aimlessly.
Jade sighs, extending his arm to guide you out of the room and see his brother until he gazes at the current state you’re in. Messied hair, swollen lips, and ruined nightwear, you smile messily at him,
“… I shall see to Floyd, stay in here.” he turns toe and walks toward the doors, your smile falling as you look at him.
He doesn’t think you’ve noticed, but you can see the way his body grows wispy in the light. You’ve seen the way he grows bigger at night.
You’ve noticed that Jade Leech has never been the man he says he is, for he is anything but a man.
You should’ve known when the first moment you met him was through the remnants of Azuls shadow.
—————————————
A/n: I hope everyone enjoyed this!!! So far I think this is my favorite fic i’ve written (≧◡≦) ♡. Honestly, I thought about having Floyd make an appearance, but I thought it would be funnier if Jade stop him from ever seeing you because he gets jealous you like him more LMAO.
It’s not explicitly stated there because I wanted reader to be in the complete dark about the contract, but the reason he had you wed Jade after his death is simply because he loves you so much, the idea of you forever being alone because of him hurts. So, he signed the contract with Jade to ensure someone will love you in his absence 😁😁😁
Plus, He noticed the way he gave you googly eyes whenever you were around and was like “really? In front of me?”
Poor Floyd curses the fact he didn’t make his lovey dovey eyes as strong as Jades ever since your remarriage, should’ve been him 😞.
#yandere twisted wonderland#yandere twst#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#yan twst#yandere azul ashengrotto#azul ashengrotto x reader#jade leech x reader#yandere jade leech#yandere twisted wonderland x reader#yandere
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forsaken | h.s
summary: florence 1583. a woman of fire, a man of fuel.
cw: smut18+ penetration (piv), oral fem!receiving, parent death, fem!reader, unedited. unrealistic happy ending if u seek tragedy 😔
world count: approx 17.2k
| omg will be writing more on these 2, renaissancerry is my heart <3 not rlly thinking a series, more like extras on them fosho. ps: am not a historian or time traveler–if u see something incorrect no u didn’t
masterlist
Florence, 1583
Harry Edward Styles was born to a mother, an older sister, and two fathers—one of blood, one of choice.
The man that bore his blood to the two Styles children preferred the sound of the way glasses of ale would clink in warm evenings, the twinkle of gold coins in the sunlight. Children were the continuation of a name, a bloodline—and that’s all he thought them to be. The only fathering a man was made to do was the ritual of burying their seed in a woman, her duty was to grow them.
So, after a son with his same eyes drew his first breath, he rose a dagger and marked his heel with one singular, vertical dash.
He had done the same when his sister was brought into this world, but he marked her with a horizontal dash.
Their mother, Anne, didn’t understand why—and hated it with every fiber in her being—watching her newborns cry for any other reason then being pulled from the comfort of their mother’s womb.
Once their father left after Harry’s first week on earth, she understood why, his words messily printed with ink on parchment.
Dearest Anne,
Thank you for bringing my own flesh and blood into this world. You are a woman I entrust most with them, having been chosen by God to bear such souls.
Which is why I must leave. A man has more to do with his time on this Earth than to nurture, I shall pour my being into others and bring forth more Brothers and Sisters for sweet Gemma and Harry.
My blood with course through this nation and find itself basking within the kingdom of heaven. I’ve marked my children to find them when God finally calls us forth.
Your womb is a gift from the angels above.
Until then,
– Desmond.
For a while, she mourned the loss of her lover and children’s father. But as time continued, as it always does, she realized that she had dodged the fatal strike of a sword.
She was unsure of the crimes committed by the hands of their father, but she remembers hearing the news of him being hung in the southernmost village of their country.
On Harry’s second birthday, she had fallen in love with a woodmaker, Robin. Shortly after, they moved to Wiltshire and Robin was always known as their papa.
Of course, Harry and Gemma had learnt their true parentage before the dawn of Gemma’s thirteenth birthday, but it was hard to mourn a man you had never known.
Anne would have never told them he was hung in a town’s square, but ascended to heaven of natural causes—the inevitable kiss of an angel.
The scent of turpentine and drying oils had long become as familiar to Harry as the earth beneath his feet. In the cool stillness of his studio, he paused, fingers stained with ochres and umbers, to stare at the remnants of his father’s brush—the one he had used all those years ago, before the fever came.
Harry’s father had been no renowned artist. He was a man of simple trades, a woodworker from the hills of Wiltshire, far from the splendor of Florence’s sunlit domes. But in the evenings, when the day’s labors were done, his father would sit by the window, painting quietly by candlelight. It was there, beside him, that Harry had first seen the magic of creation—colors flowing like rivers across rough wood and fraying canvas, ordinary scenes transformed by the wild, unspoken emotion in every stroke.
His father had painted not for fame, but for peace.
Harry had only been fourteen when his father’s hands, once steady and sure, began to tremble with sickness. His chest had grown tight, his breaths shallow, until finally they stopped altogether. He remembers the way the pads of his fingertips would prune from bringing a water soaked rag to his lips, how his father would drink from the drops of it.
For a while, he hated the color red and grey. His father’s lips would crack with peaks of crimson, leaving faint stains of red on the water rag in its wake. His skin greyed in a speed he didn’t think possible once his heart fell absent of a beat.
In the days that followed, the house had filled with the clamor of neighbors, mourners, and merchants, but Harry could only hear the quiet absence in the stillness.
In the flickering silence, he had picked up his father’s brush.
The years after his father’s death were a blur of movement, as though he had been running from some unseen ghost. He had wandered south, across valleys and mountains, always chasing the sun. By the time he arrived in Florence, he was a man of twenty three and had little more than the clothes on his back and a single paintbrush to his name.
Florence had embraced him like a reluctant lover. The city’s streets were gilded with Renaissance splendor, yet heavy with the weight of expectation. It was a place of grandeur and art, where even beauty was a form of currency—where the Medici and other noble families wore their wealth as a crown and commissioned artists to immortalize their names in frescoes and portraits.
Harry’s talent had bloomed in these streets, but it had come at a price. Every stroke of his brush, every commission, felt like an unspoken promise to a father who would never see what his son had become. The bright colors of his palette were often mixed with the shadow of his grief, and though his name was now whispered in the gilded halls of Florence’s elite, Harry felt as though he were forever painting in the twilight between joy and sorrow.
Sometimes his mind would wonder to the possibility of if he was an angel banished by God, his punishment being to bear the pain of not having lost one, but two fathers.
Three if he counted the absence of Jesus in his life. He felt fatherless, in all senses of the word.
Or maybe it was all well circulated fairytale, conjured in the thoughts of his father’s, the one he shared blood with, brain.
He had grown to resent the mark on his foot, and in the depths of his heart he would refer it as the the kiss of the devil, rather than the mark of God.
He would blame his struggle with faith on his fathers, the three men who sat behind the title.
Desmond, for abandoning his family.
Robin, who loved him like a son and died in front of his eyes.
And Jesus, who had ignored his prayers for his papa to stay and to take him instead.
But it was the pain, the deep and gnawing ache within him, that had given his art its soul. His patrons spoke in reverence of his ability to capture more than a face—how he painted the delicate tremor of a moment, a fleeting look, a breath before the breaking. His works were praised as vibrant, yes, but they also carried something deeper, something tragic. A hidden sadness, like the ghost of a love lost too soon.
In his heart, he knew: he painted because the world was filled with such unrelenting beauty, and that beauty was fleeting. To capture it was to hold on, however briefly, to something that could not last.
One afternoon, as golden light filtered through the shutters, a letter arrived. The wax seal bore the mark of a powerful house—the Candela family. A commission for their daughter’s portrait. A noble request, one that might cement his place among Florence’s greatest. But it was not the promise of riches or recognition that made Harry’s heart stir with something close to fear. It was the girl herself, the rebellious daughter who, rumor had it, could not be tamed by family or duty.
As Harry read the letter, his thoughts drifted back to the girl he had once seen in the Candela gardens. Her eyes had been bright, but wild. Free. In that moment, he knew what she was—a living echo of the spirit he had long tried to capture in his art: untamable, elusive, yet heartbreakingly beautiful.
It was a portrait that might change everything. Or destroy him.
He set the letter down and turned back to the canvas, but his hands trembled once more, just as his father’s had in those final days. A reminder of mortality. A reminder that every brushstroke was borrowed time.
But still, he would paint.
*
The heavy velvet curtains of the Candela palazzo had long felt like a prison to her. Born into one of Florence’s oldest and wealthiest families, Y/N had spent her life in the shadow of their legacy—one that was both gilded with fortune and bound by duty. From the moment she took her first breath, her future had been decided for her. Her days were filled with lessons in etiquette, music, embroidery, and diplomacy, while her nights were a symphony of forced pleasantries at banquets and balls, always under the watchful eyes of her mother and the judgment of the city’s elite.
But from a young age, Y/N knew she was not made for such a life. Beneath the layers of silks and jewels, beneath the carefully orchestrated smiles and curtsies, there was a fire burning in her—one that she had learned to hide from everyone around her, for fear it would consume her entirely.
Her earliest memories were not of the marble halls of the palazzo, but of the gardens beyond its walls, the wild olive groves that stretched out toward the hills. It was there, in the quiet spaces between her responsibilities, that she found her freedom. She had spent her childhood escaping into the fields, where the wind would tear through her hair and her laughter would echo through the trees, free from the rules that shackled her in the world of men.
Her father, the head of the family, was a cold and distant man, more concerned with his political alliances than with his children. He rarely spoke to her except to remind her of her place—her duty to the family, her obligation to marry into another powerful house and secure the Candela legacy. Y/N’s mother was no different, though her scoldings came wrapped in sweet, deceptive smiles. She had been raised to be an ornament, a living testament to her family’s wealth and power, and Y/N was expected to do the same.
But she refused to be molded by their expectations.
She had always been different from the other girls of her station. Where they dreamed of betrothals and courtly love, she dreamed of escape. She would slip out of the palazzo at night, dressed in the simple clothes of a servant, and wander the streets of Florence, blending into the crowd, invisible for the first time in her life. In the dim glow of lanterns, she would listen to the street musicians, watch the painters in the piazza, and breathe in the freedom that was denied to her by daylight.
By the time she reached womanhood, her spirit had only grown wilder. Her parents, exasperated by her refusal to marry the suitors they paraded before her, tightened their grip on her life. But the more they tried to contain her, the more fiercely she fought to break free. She began to push the boundaries of what was expected of a noblewoman—her wit was too sharp, her temper too bold, her opinions too dangerous. Whispers spread through the Florentine courts, branding her rebellious, unfit for the delicate role of a noble wife.
It was not that Y/N wanted to be unwed. She simply refused to give her life to a man who would cage her like a bird. She longed for something more than what Florence could offer her, more than a life of duty and appearance. There were moments—fleeting though they were—when she felt she could see the world as it truly was, raw and beautiful, and she wanted to live in that truth, not the carefully constructed illusion of noble society.
That was when her mother decided it was time to have her portrait painted, a desperate attempt to remind the world of her beauty, her value. It was, of course, more for show than for art—another piece in the game of noble alliances, another way to lure in potential suitors. But Y/N saw it for what it was: a final effort to tame her.
And that was when she had first heard his name—Harry, the painter from the north.
Her mother spoke of him with the same dismissive tone she used for all the artisans they employed, but there was something about this Harry that intrigued her. He was not born of noble blood, and yet his name carried weight in the circles that mattered. The Medici spoke of him with admiration, and even the Pope had once commissioned his work. His paintings, it was said, had a rare quality—they revealed not just the outward beauty of a subject, but the soul beneath.
Y/N had seen one of his works in the home of a distant cousin, a portrait of a young woman who had died tragically young. The face had been serene, the colors soft and gentle, but the eyes—the eyes had told a story of longing and loss that no courtly painter would dare to capture. It had haunted her ever since.
For days, she tried to convince herself it was just another scheme of her parents—another attempt to make her fit the mold she had spent her life breaking. Yet, she could not deny the flicker of curiosity that sparked within her. What would this man see in her? Would he, too, try to make her into something she was not? Or would he paint the fire she had spent her whole life hiding?
The day her mother informed her of the first sitting, Y/N had felt the familiar weight of resignation settle over her. She would sit for this portrait because she had no choice. She would smile, she would pose, and in the end, her mother would hang the portrait in some grand hall for every eligible bachelor to admire. It was all part of the game they had been playing for years.
But when the day came, and she finally entered the makeshift studio lended to Harry for the length of his time here, she felt a shift in the air, as though the fates had turned their gaze upon her.
Harry was not what she expected. He was younger, rougher around the edges than the other artists her family had employed. His dark curls were wild, and there was a certain sadness in his eyes, something she recognized all too well. He was no stranger to loss, that much was clear. His eyes were a vibrant green she had not seen before, unless she counted the gardens that sat in a rainy haze. Perhaps he was a painting himself. And he, too, seemed out of place in the glittering world of Florence’s elite. It was as though he was merely passing through, as though he belonged somewhere quieter, more distant.
Draped in heavy silks, with eyes as sharp as a hawk and a posture that suggested defiance rather than decorum, the daughter of the noble Candela family was unlike any of his previous subjects. Her name was Y/N, and she exuded an air of mischief that the delicate ladies of Florence rarely allowed themselves to entertain.
He did not greet her with flowery pleasantries, as other painters had. Instead, he regarded her quietly for a moment, his eyes flickering over her face—not in judgment, but as if he were searching for something hidden beneath the surface.
“You’re the one they cannot tame.” He said at last, his voice low, almost amused. His accent confirmed he did not have deep roots in Italy, it sounded more of the English suitors her mother would introduce.
It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. And somehow, in that moment, Y/N knew that he had already seen more of her than her family ever had.
She smirked, meeting his gaze without hesitation. “That depends on what you believe needs taming.”
Harry’s lips quirked into a half-smile, and for the first time in years, Y/N felt as though she could breathe just from the few seconds in his presence.
Her eyes gaze around the studio as she waltzes further in, her lips in a closed smile. Her skin held the glow of the sun beautifully, hair bouncing with the scent of lavender. Her fingers feather across a few empty canvasses he has on stilts, messes of paint and brushes scattered onto a table. “They say Hephaestus molded your flesh and bones before sending you to Earth.” She eased, a smile still on her reddened lips. Her steps clicked closer to where Harry stood, eyes still drawn out the windows surrounded by nature. “I heard Aphrodite herself kissed your wrist, frame still soft with clay.”
He couldn’t help but chuckle, though her tone soft, there was anything but sincere admiration laced in her words. “I assure you that there’s no markings of her kiss pressed unto me—m’just a man with a brush.”
She hummed, rounding the stilt between them and watching the sunlight glimmer in his eye as the sun would in the waves. There was no denying the shift in the air between them, an unspoken understanding that went beyond the typical dance of polite conversation. In this studio, amidst the scent of oils and pigment, they were stripped of the titles and roles society had thrust upon them.
“A man with a brush.” She repeated softly, almost to herself. She reached out, her fingers grazing the surface of one of the unfinished canvases. The texture of it was rough, still raw with potential, much like her own life—full of promise, but still undefined. “I wonder,” she continued, her voice barely above a whisper, “what you see when you look at me.”
Harry’s hands, stained with the colors of his art, stilled for a moment. He had painted many faces, each one a portrait of both beauty and sorrow, but this woman—this subject—was different. There was something about Y/N that made him hesitate. She was not like the others who sat for him with plastered smiles, eager to be frozen in time, their beauty immortalized for the world to see.
No, Y/N did not want to be captured in that way. She wanted something more, something truer. Her spirit was restless, untamed, and her gaze held a challenge, as though daring him to see beyond the layers of silks and expectations. To see the woman beneath.
Slowly, Harry moved closer to her, the distance between them shrinking. He studied her face, not with the detached gaze of an artist trying to perfect his subject’s likeness, but with a quiet intensity that sent a ripple through the stillness of the room. His voice, when it came, was low and deliberate.
“I see a woman who was never meant t’be caged.” He mumbled. “I see fire and wind—a calm in an eye of a storm that would bring no ruin; something wild, something the world doesn’t understand.”
Y/N’s breath hitched slightly at his words. It was as if, in a single moment, he had unraveled all the masks she had carefully worn her entire life. The world she had known, the roles she had played, felt fragile and false in the face of this raw truth.
“And yet,” Harry continued, his voice dipping lower, “they try to fit you into a frame, don’t they? As if y’could ever be captured.”
For the first time in what felt like years, Y/N let herself be vulnerable. She turned away from the canvases, facing him fully, the light catching the strands of her hair like molten gold. Her eyes met his, no longer guarded, no longer deflecting.
“I don’t belong in that frame.” She whispered, the words slipping past her lips like a confession. “But they’ve been trying to fit me into one for as long as I can remember.”
Harry nodded, his gaze never wavering from hers. “I know.” He said simply. “I’ve spent my life painting what people want to see. But you–”
He trailed off, as though the thought itself was too bold, too dangerous to speak aloud.
“Me?” she pressed, her heart beginning to race in her chest. She stepped closer, drawn to him in a way that felt both terrifying and inevitable.
“With you,” Harry continued, his voice a hushed murmur, “I want t’paint what the world can’t see.”
For a moment, neither of them spoke. The tension between them was palpable, charged with the weight of unspoken desires, and the world outside the studio seemed to fade away. In that small, sunlit room, there were no titles, no expectations, only two souls who had somehow found one another in a world that had tried to break them.
Y/N’s hand hovered near Harry’s arm, and then, slowly, as if testing the waters of some forbidden sea, she let her fingers brush against his. The contact was light, fleeting, but it sent a shockwave through both of them.
“I want that too,” she whispered, her voice trembling with the vulnerability of the admission.
Harry swallowed, the pulse of his heartbeat thrumming in his ears. He had never felt this way about a subject before, had never let himself blur the lines between artist and muse. But with Y/N, those lines had already been crossed the moment she had walked into his studio.
They stood there for a moment longer, hands barely touching, eyes locked in a silent conversation. And then, as if by unspoken agreement, they both pulled back—just enough to remind themselves of the roles they were meant to play, even as those roles were beginning to crumble.
Harry stepped away first, turning back to his easel, his voice steady as he spoke. “We’ll begin the portrait today. But I won’t paint what they expect.” He nodded toward her, “A caged dove to be set free.”
Y/N’s lips curved into a soft smile, her heart still pounding in her chest. She knew, in that moment, that whatever Harry painted, it would be the truest version of herself she had ever seen. And it would bind them together in ways neither of them could yet understand.
“This will displease them.” She smiled, pausing her words. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Her voice carried the weight of a promise, though she wasn’t sure who it was meant for—him, or herself.
Without another word, he jutted his chin toward the chair in the center of the room. “Sit.” He instructed, his tone soft but firm.
She followed his gesture, looking toward the seat and ambling toward it silently. She sat, keeping her spine stiff—something that was embedded into her through her training over the years. His eyes narrowed onto her face, cataloging each curve, line, and hint of emotion that sat in her eyes.
Their sittings became a ritual over the last month—an escape from the suffocating demands of her family, from the world that sought to control her. Each time she stepped into his studio, it was as though she left the weight of her name behind, shedding it like a heavy cloak. Here, she was not the Candela daughter, not the rebellious heiress trapped by duty. She was simply Y/N, a woman with dreams and desires that no one had ever cared to ask about.
Harry painted in near silence, his brush moving with a precision that bordered on reverence. But as the days passed, the silences grew warmer, more comfortable, and slowly, they began to talk. He spoke of his father, of the quiet life in England he had left behind, and of how he had found himself in Florence, painting for men who would never understand the depth of what he was trying to capture.
And she, for the first time, spoke of her own longing. Not for marriage or jewels, but for freedom. For the wildness of the world outside the palazzo gates. She told him of the nights she wandered the streets alone, the moments when she felt most alive, when the weight of her name fell away and she became just another face in the crowd.
With every word, with every glance, they both knew they were crossing a line—one that could never be uncrossed. Their relationship was not one of artist and subject. It was something deeper, more dangerous. And Florence, with all its grandeur, was not kind to those who broke its rules.
As Harry’s brush moved over the canvas, he realized he was no longer painting just a portrait. He was capturing the essence of a woman who had lived her entire life behind a mask, forced into roles she never wanted to play. With each stroke, he revealed her fire, her vulnerability, her defiance.
And Y/N, who had spent her life being told what she should be, saw herself reflected in his eyes—not as the noble daughter, not as the prize her family sought to offer to the highest bidder, but as she truly was.
In those stolen moments, as the sunlight filtered through the shutters and the world outside seemed to fall away, they became something Florence would never understand. They were freedom itself—dangerous, fleeting, and unbearably beautiful.
Y/N’s portrait only neared its finish as time continued to pass. They would always meet three times a week for about an hour or two. She would never say it out loud, but it began to become a favorite part of her weeks—meeting Harry. His soul was anything unlike she’s ever known, and all she wanted to do was linger.
They sat outside the cobblestone studio, lying upon a blanket adorned with fresh vegetables, cheeses and meats. Her mother and Father had been out for the day, and she thought it’d be a perfect opportunity to see Harry as he is, rather than the painter.
He spoke of his travels as he would eagerly show her he could catch the bites of cheese he would throw into his mouth—and he would order her to rank each catch one through ten.
Harry lied back, weight on his elbow as his curls tousled perfectly in the warm breeze. Y/N lied on her belly, kicking her feet in the air behind her as she lie her head on her folded arms.
The afternoon sun peaked from the trees above them, catching the light in her eyes perfectly. Harry always found her to be beautiful, but at this moment she looked ethereal.
He tossed another piece of cheese into the air, leaning his head back and catching it deftly with his mouth, smiling proudly as he chewed. “Well?” He asked, his voice teasing. “What say you? Surely that was a ten.”
Y/N laughed, the sound as bright as the sun and as sweet as the strawberry he head earlier. “A six, perhaps.” She grinned, voice lilting with playful challenge. “Surely you could do better.”
His smirk widened, and he threw another piece of cheese, catching it again with exaggerated flourish. “A six indeed.” He mumbled, feigning offense. “I think you’re quite mistaken, my lady.”
She bit her lip to suppress another laugh, shaking her head against her forearms. “Perhaps your talents lie elsewhere.” She mused, her voice dripping to a soft, flirtatious murmur as she gazed at him through her lashes. “Catching cheese seems beneath you.”
His eyes sparkled with mischief, but there was something else in them too—something she hadn’t seem from him yet, something that sent a shiver down her spine. "And what talents might you suggest, then?" he asked, his voice low and teasing, though the undertone was laden with meaning.
Y/N's breath caught for a moment, her heart fluttering in her chest as the playful banter between them took on a new edge. Her gaze lingered on his lips before she tore it away, focusing on the light streaming through the leaves above them. "I think you know the answer to that.” she replied, her voice barely above a whisper.
For a moment, the world seemed to still around them. The laughter and lightness faded, replaced by the palpable tension that had been simmering between them for weeks. It hung in the air now, thick and undeniable. Harry shifted beside her, his playful grin fading into something more serious as he watched her carefully, as though waiting for her to give him permission to step closer to that edge.
He wanted to toss away the platter that lay between them, to grab her waist and flip her onto her back and show her the talents he possessed. It made his heart go into a sputtered mess, to cloud his gaze with need. He wondered if she knew how beautiful she was in that moment.
“Did you hear me?”
Harry blinked, shaking his head before letting a sheepish smile spread across his lips. “No. I suppose not.”
“Have you ever thought of leaving Florence, H? Of leaving all of this behind?"
Harry narrowed his eyes, the question pulling him from whatever unspoken thought had been lingering on his lips. He exhaled softly, rolling onto his back and staring up at the sky. "I've thought of it," he admitted after a moment, his voice quieter now, thoughtful. "But Florence has become something of a home. Even if it binds me, l've learned t’live within those bounds."
Y/N frowned, her heart tightening at his words.
"But don't you wish for more? Don't you long for freedom?"
He turned his head to look at her, and in his eyes, she saw a reflection of her own yearning, the quiet desperation that they had both been trying to ignore. "Of course I do," he murmured. "But freedom is not something easily won. Especially not for people like us."
She swallowed, the weight of his words settling over her like a shroud. She had always believed that Harry, in some way, was freer than she could ever be—an artist, a man without title or the crushing expectations of nobility. But now, she saw the truth. He was as trapped as she was, bound by the invisible chains of his station, his livelihood tied to the whims of men like her father, men who would never derstand the depths of what he truly wanted create.
"And you?" he asked, his voice soft but filled with quiet intensity. "If you could go anywhere, if you could leave all this behind, where would you go?"
She hesitated, the question stirring something deep within her, a longing she had never dared to voice. "Anywhere," she whispered, her gaze distant. "Anywhere but here. I want to see the world, to lose myself in it. I want to go where no one knows my name, where I can be just Y/N—not the daughter of Candela, not someone's prize to be won."
Harry's gaze softened, and for a long moment, neither of them spoke. The sun dipped lower in the sky, casting long shadows across the garden, but the air between them crackled with an intensity that neither of them could ignore.
"And if l asked you to go with me?" she said suddenly, her voice trembling with the weight of the question. "Would you?"
Harry's breath hitched, and for a moment, he didn't answer. When he finally spoke, his voice was low, almost pained. "If you asked me, I would follow you anywhere."
Y/N's heart pounded in her chest, the enormity of his words settling over her like a heavy cloak. The desire to reach out, to cross the boundary they had been skirting for weeks, pulsed through her veins. But fear-fear of the consequences, of what they would beer if they gave in to this—held her back. Harry could feel the weight of her thoughts, the far away look in his eye. He sighed gently, propping himself back onto his elbow as he took a cheese from the platter, lightly throwing it toward Y/N.
It pulled her from her thoughts with a smile as it bounced from her shoulder onto the blanket spread beneath him. He laughed, leaning across the space between them and stealing the cheese for himself. “That’s a zero, I’m afraid.”
*
Before meeting Harry around the same time she had been, she brought forth a bowl of fruits from the kitchen—both a snack and a small gift. The heat was unforgiving today, adorned with the same silk gown she was supposed to wear during these sessions, but her feet were bare. The ground was cold beneath her, blades of grass leaving kisses from the dew left behind.
The temporary studio Harry resided in was across the courtyard, a small, cobblestone building hidden between trees and a small pond.
As she reached the studio, the door slightly ajar, she paused, listening. Inside, she could hear the faint sound of Harry moving, his footsteps light as he adjusted the easel or mixed colors on his palette. Her heart quickened, not out of nervousness, but out of anticipation. Each day spent with him had become an escape, a release from the weight of her family’s expectations.
Pushing the door open with her hip, Y/N entered the room, the bowl of fruit balanced in her hands. Harry was bent over his canvas, his shirt sleeves rolled up, revealing the sinew of his forearms, streaked with paint. His dark curls were unruly, as though he had been running his fingers through them absentmindedly. When he looked up and saw her, a smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
“You’re early today, my dove.” He grinned, his voice warm, the familiar hint of amusement dancing in his eyes.
“I brought something.”Y/N murmured, holding up the bowl of fruit. “A peace offering, perhaps.”
Harry raised an eyebrow, setting his brush down and wiping his hands on a nearby rag. He stepped toward her, his eyes flicking from the bowl of fruit to her face, as though trying to discern the real reason for her gift. But there was no pretense between them here, only the quiet truth of what they had started to build—a fragile, unspoken connection that neither of them dared to name.
“I did not understand us to be at war.” Harry teased gently, his voice dropping to that low, familiar murmur that always seemed to make Y/N’s pulse quicken.
She smiled, setting the bowl down on a nearby table. “In these walls, we are always at war.” Her tone was soft, the weight of her words lingering in the air. Her gaze shifted to the canvas behind him, where her likeness had slowly begun to take shape. He was capturing her in a way no one had before—not as the carefully polished daughter of Florence’s elite, but as the restless, untamed spirit she had always been. She stepped closer to the easel, studying the way he had painted her eyes, the intensity of her gaze, the subtle fire that simmered beneath the surface.
“You paint me as though you know me.” She paused, her voice barely above a whisper.
Harry’s eyes softened, his expression unreadable as he stood beside her. “I am beginning to.”
Her heart skipped a beat at the quiet intimacy of his words. She felt exposed, vulnerable in a way she had never allowed herself to be before. For so long, she had worn her defiance as armor, a shield against the world that sought to control her. But here, with Harry, she didn’t need that armor. She could be raw, unguarded, free.
Y/N turned to face him fully, her bare feet making no sound on the cold stone floor. She had spent her life being afraid—afraid of disappointing her family, afraid of not living up to their expectations, afraid of being trapped in a life that wasn’t her own. But standing here, inches away from Harry, she realized that the only thing she was truly afraid of was losing this—this feeling, this connection, this fleeting glimpse of what life could be like outside the constraints of duty and decorum. “I am no artist, but your own beauty belongs on canvas.”
For a moment, Harry’s hand hovered near hers, as though he was about to reach out, to close the distance between them. But instead, he stepped back, turning to the easel once more, a breathy chuckle escaping him. “Okay, Shakespeare. Let us thank our lucky stars that you are not.”
She laughs with him, placing the bowl of fruit on the table beside the paint. She shook her head, popping a grape into her mouth. “Here I thought you to whisper me something poetic—we all have an art about us, we are art ourselves.” She mocked in his accent, rolling her eyes.
“Well that would be simply untrue.” He grinned, adjusting the canvas before him. “I am much too talented for you to compare your hand to my own.”
She scoffed, though it was humorous. Through her feigned offense, his lips only spread wider. “Show me to be wrong.”
“Show you wrong?” She raised her eyebrow, parting her lips. “You want me to paint you?”
He nodded, glancing at the blank canvases behind him. She only rolled her eyes as she gently grabbed his wrist, pulling him to the chair into the center of the room. He sat expectantly, his dimple cratering his cheeks as she retreated back toward the bowl of fruit, fishing out a deep red cherry, skipping back toward him. He knit his brows in confusion, but Y/N’s lips parted to speak before him. “You are to be my canvas.” She smiled, bring the cherry to his lips like a challenge. His expression was amused, though he couldn’t deny the way she made his chest tighten with tension. His eyes flickered between both her eyes and the fruit as he gently bit into the fruit, his lips brushing against her fingertips.
It was slow, deliberately intimate. Their eyes still burrowed into each others, she watched as the bead of crimson juice dribble down his chin. She thumbed it away, her touch light and fleeting before she feathers the fruit across the apples of his cheeks, adding to the already flushed pigment. Hesitantly, she pressed her fingers into the glistening flesh, patting it in and leaving his cheeks and lips painted red.
She steps back ever so slightly, putting the rest of the cherry into her mouth and letting a quiet laugh escape her lips. “Consider yourself to be painted.”
He shook his head, his cherry red lips widening into a smile as he stood. “Somehow, I don’t think that’s how it works.” Harry leaned in close, his breath a whisper against her cheek, but he made no move to wipe the remnants of cherry from his skin. His eyes, still dancing with amusement, searched hers, lingering with a quiet intensity. “I’ll grant you this.” He murmured, his voice low, carrying the hint of a jest. “Your methods are..most unconventional.”
She smirked, refusing to be daunted by his nearness. “Unconventional?” she quipped, her chin rising with a flicker of defiance. “I would call it a work of art. Would you not?”
Harry raised a brow, feigning deep thought as he smeared the red juice across his chin with a casual flick of his finger. “A work of art, you say? If by that you mean I appear as though I’ve just stumbled from a duel with a fruit cart, then aye, I’ll concede to your genius.”
Her laughter rang through the studio, a sharp contrast to the quiet that had hung heavy in the room moments before. It echoed off the stone walls, a sound so free that it banished all thoughts of duty, of propriety. The half-finished portrait on the easel, the weight of her family’s name—all of it melted away. In that moment, it was just them. Two souls bound in a fleeting absurdity, lost in shared laughter.
“Delicate sensibilities,” she teased, her brow arching as she wiped the last of the cherry’s stain from her hand. “I never thought to find such in a man.”
Harry’s lips curled into a slow, wicked grin. “Delicate, am I?” He drawled, his voice thick with mischief. In a single swift motion, he swiped his thumb across her cheek, leaving a streak of red in its wake. “There. Now we are even.”
She gasped in mock indignation, taking a step back as her fingers flew to the sticky mark on her face. “You’ll rue this day, Harry Styles.”
“Will I?” he challenged, his tone now deep and laden with mischief of its own.
Y/N moved closer, closing the space between them with a deliberate slowness. Her heart raced, but not with the trepidation that had gripped her so often in this room. No, this was something far more exhilarating. The world outside this studio—the rules, the expectations, the rigid walls of her life—it all felt distant, unimportant.
“I’ve never claimed to be a master of painting,” she whispered, her voice dropping like the edge of a velvet curtain. She took a few steps backward, reaching into the bowl and pulling out a plum. She looks at it expectantly in the gleam of sunlight, trotting back toward the painter. “Yet I do believe the best art thrives with a hint of chaos.”
Before he could form a reply, she bit the dark fruit pressed it hard against his chest. The plum burst, sending dark juice cascading down his tunic, staining it deep purple.
Harry blinked in astonishment, his expression hanging in the space between disbelief and amusement. But the moment of shock passed swiftly, and his laughter came, full and bright. “Your peace offering was a coup!” he declared, lunging forward with a handful of cherries.
Y/N shrieked and darted away, her laughter filling the air as she dodged him. They circled the room, the once-serene studio descending into joyful chaos. Fruit flew, staining the floors, the easel, their clothes—a riot of color and recklessness.
By the grace of God the portrait remained untouched through the ordeal.
It was madness. Glorious, reckless madness. And for the first time in her life, Y/N felt utterly, completely free. Free from the chains of decorum, free from the burden of her family’s name. In that riot of fruit and laughter, she was simply alive.
When at last they collapsed onto the floor, breathless and sticky, the room a ruin of color and laughter, neither of them could stop smiling.
Harry lay beside her, still chuckling as he tugged at the ruined tunic. “If my patrons could see me now, they’d see me cast out of Florence faster than y’could say ‘masterpiece.’”
Y/N propped herself up on her elbow, a grin dancing across her lips. “Then we shall flee to the hills. I’ll hide you amongst the olive groves. We’ll live like rogues, artists and outlaws.”
“Artists and outlaws,” Harry echoed, his smile softening, his eyes lingering on hers with a look that carried something far deeper than the playfulness of a moment before. “I think I could grow fond of such a life.”
And in that quiet, as their laughter ebbed into the late afternoon light, Y/N felt the air shift between them. What had started as a game, as flirtation, had become something real. Something undeniable.
And try as they might, neither could outrun it.
As they lay there amidst the chaos, the moment stretched on, teetering on the edge of something neither could fully name. Y/N’s pulse thrummed in her ears, her heart racing not from the frivolity of their earlier play, but from the weight of his gaze on her. The air between them had thickened, laden with an unspoken tension that neither laughter nor fruit could break.
Just as her lips parted to speak—to say something, anything to diffuse the intensity—a sound, sharp and echoing, pierced the air.
The door to the studio had swung open, and there, silhouetted by the fading light of the late afternoon, stood Y/N’s mother, Lady Candela, her presence a sudden, jarring intrusion into their world of fleeting freedom.
Her eyes, dark and sharp as the blade of a dagger, took in the scene before her: the floor littered with the remnants of their childish game, the streaks of fruit staining both their clothes and skin, the disheveled state of her daughter and the painter. And in an instant, the mask of propriety that Y/N had so desperately sought to tear away snapped back into place.
“Y/N.” Her mother’s voice was cold, clipped, a tone that could freeze the blood in one’s veins. “What, in God’s name, is the meaning of this?”
Y/N scrambled to her feet, her breath catching in her throat, but her defiance flickered in her eyes. She had been caught, but she would not cower. “Mother,” she began, her voice steady despite the racing of her heart, “it was nothing—just—”
“Nothing?” Lady Candela stepped forward, her posture rigid, her lips pressed into a thin line of disapproval. “This disgrace is nothing? You, a daughter of the Candela family, covered in filth like a common servant? Is this how you choose to honor your name?”
Harry, who had risen to his feet beside Y/N, cleared his throat, stepping forward as if to shield her from the wrath of her mother. “My Lady, it was my doing,” he lied smoothly, his voice respectful but firm. “I allowed myself to get carried away during our session. The fault is mine.”
Lady Candela’s eyes flickered to him, her disdain barely concealed. “And you—an artist—think you can speak on matters of decorum in this house? You are here to paint, not to play the fool.”
Harry’s jaw tightened, but he said nothing more. He could feel Y/N tense beside him, her fists clenched at her sides. The silence that followed was thick with tension, the weight of Lady Candela’s expectations pressing down on them both like a vice.
But Y/N, ever the rebel, would not be silenced.
“I am not a child, Mother,” she said quietly, her voice cutting through the air like a blade. “I will not be tamed.”
Lady Candela’s gaze snapped to her daughter, her eyes narrowing. “You will be what this family needs you to be, YN. This behavior—this foolishness—ends now. You are to be married, and your actions today have only made that more urgent.”
Y/N’s heart sank, the reality of her mother’s words hitting her like a blow. Marriage. The cage she had spent her entire life trying to escape was closing in around her, tighter and tighter.
She glanced at Harry, her chest tightening. The fleeting freedom they had found in one another was slipping away, vanishing like a mirage in the desert. And yet, she knew she could not let it end like this.
“Perhaps I wished for something more than just another hollow painting to hang on the walls of your prison,” Y/N said, her voice stronger than she felt inside. She could see Harry stiffen at her side, his gaze flickering between her and Lady Candela, but he stayed silent, letting her words hang in the air.
Her mother’s mouth tightened into a thin line. She took a deliberate step forward, her eyes narrowing as they bore into Y/N. “A prison?” she hissed, her voice dropping dangerously low. “You speak of this house as if it were a cage, when all we have done—all I have done—is ensure you live in luxury, surrounded by the finest of Florence. Yet here you are, acting the fool with a common painter.” She spat the word like venom, her eyes flicking toward Harry before returning to her daughter. “Do you want to ruin yourself? To become nothing but a scandal whispered about in the courts?”
Y/N’s fists clenched at her sides, her nails digging into her palms, but she kept her voice level. “What you call ruin, I call freedom.”
Her mother’s eyes blazed, her nostrils flaring, but before she could retort, Harry stepped forward, his voice calm but firm. “My Lady, if I may—”
“You may not,” Lady Candela snapped, cutting him off with a sharp glare. “You are here to paint. Nothing more. Your thoughts and opinions are of no concern to me.”
Harry’s jaw tightened, but he bowed his head, stepping back in silent acquiescence.
The silence that followed was thick with tension, each breath Y/N took feeling heavier than the last. Her mother’s gaze never wavered, cold and unyielding, but Y/N refused to back down. Not this time.
“Mother,” Y/N began again, her voice softer now, though no less resolute. “I do not wish to ruin the family’s name. But I also do not wish to be something I am not. I have given you my obedience for years, attended every ball, entertained every suitor you’ve paraded before me. But I cannot—will not—live a life that is not my own.”
For a brief moment, something flickered in Lady Candela’s eyes—something that looked almost like uncertainty, or perhaps a recognition of her daughter’s growing resolve. But it was gone in an instant, replaced by that same cold, unyielding stare.
“You have a duty, Y/N,” her mother said, her voice flat, as though the very word—duty—was the end of any argument. “To this family. To this city. And if you cannot understand that, then you are more lost than I thought.”
Y/N’s breath caught in her throat, the weight of her mother’s words pressing down on her like a heavy cloak. But before she could speak, her mother turned sharply on her heel, heading toward the door.
“You will be expected at dinner,” Lady Candela called over her shoulder, her tone dismissive. “We will discuss your upcoming engagement. I suggest you clean yourself up and remember who you are.”
With that, she swept from the room, leaving Y/N and Harry standing in the wreckage of what had once been a moment of shared joy, the heavy door closing behind her with a finality that echoed through the studio.
For a long moment, neither of them spoke. Y/N could still feel the burn of her mother’s words, each one a reminder of the gilded cage she had been trying to escape her entire life. She swallowed hard, turning toward Harry, who was watching her with a mixture of concern and something else she couldn’t quite place.
“I’m sorry,” Y/N murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. “You shouldn’t have been involved in that.”
Harry shook his head, his eyes softening as he stepped closer. “You don’t have to apologize, Y/N. I knew what I was stepping into when I took this commission.”
Y/N let out a soft, bitter laugh. “Did you? Did you know you’d be caught in the middle of a battle between duty and freedom?”
Harry smiled, but it was a sad, knowing smile. “In a way, yes. I’ve seen it before. This city—this life—demands so much from those born into its upper echelons. But I think you are stronger than you know.”
Y/N met his gaze, her heart twisting painfully in her chest. She wanted to believe him, to believe that she could somehow break free from the chains that bound her. But the reality of her situation felt suffocating, as if the walls of the studio were closing in around her.
“I don’t know what to do,” she admitted, her voice cracking slightly. “I don’t want to be trapped in a marriage I never wanted. But I don’t see a way out.”
Harry reached out, his hand gently brushing her arm, a small gesture of comfort. “There’s always a way out,” he said quietly. “But it’s not always easy.”
Y/N looked up at him, her eyes searching his face for some kind of answer, some hint of hope. But all she saw was the same uncertainty that gnawed at her heart.
“I don’t know if I’m brave enough,” she whispered.
Harry’s grip on her arm tightened, just slightly, and when he spoke, his voice was soft, but full of quiet conviction. “You are. You’ve already proven that.”
For a moment, they stood there in the quiet, the weight of the world pressing down on them, but together, they felt just a little lighter. The path ahead was uncertain, and Y/N knew the battle was far from over. But for now, in this small, sunlit room, with Harry by her side, she felt just a little bit stronger.
And maybe, just maybe, that would be enough.
The heavy, golden hour light had faded, replaced by the muted grays of twilight, casting long shadows across the stone walls of the palazzo. Y/N stood before the mirror in her chambers, her reflection staring back at her, cold and distant. She had shed the stained silk gown and washed the remnants of the fruit from her skin, but no amount of scrubbing could remove the weight of her mother’s words or the tension coiled tight in her chest.
Dinner. The final act of the day’s charade, where her mother’s sharp gaze and her father’s stony silence would frame yet another conversation about her future—a future she had no say in. The idea of sitting through another meal where her fate was decided without her input made her stomach twist with dread.
A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts, and her maid, Lucrezia, entered the room, her face a mask of quiet concern. “My lady,” she said softly, “your mother has requested your presence in the dining hall.”
Y/N let out a slow breath, her hands gripping the edge of the vanity as she steadied herself. “Of course she has,” she muttered, her voice thick with resignation.
Lucrezia stepped forward, her hands moving to adjust Y/N’s gown—another silk creation, pristine and flawless, as if nothing untoward had happened earlier. “Shall I tell her you are not feeling well?” the maid asked gently, her fingers lingering on the delicate fabric.
Y/N smiled weakly, shaking her head. “No, Lucrezia. I must face it. I always must.”
The maid nodded, though her eyes were filled with sympathy. She knew the weight that rested on Y/N’s shoulders, the burdens placed upon her by a family that demanded perfection at all times. But even Lucrezia, with her quiet understanding, could not offer a solution to the problem that had no easy answer.
With a final glance in the mirror, Y/N straightened her posture and lifted her chin. She would face this evening the way she had faced every other trial in her life—head on, even if it tore her apart inside.
The walk to the dining hall felt longer than usual, each step echoing in the vast, empty corridors. The palazzo, so grand and full of splendor, felt like a prison tonight, its marble floors cold beneath her feet, its towering walls closing in on her with every breath.
When she reached the dining hall, she paused just outside the door, gathering her courage. She could hear the faint clinking of silverware and the low murmur of voices—her mother’s sharp, clear tones and her father’s deep, measured replies. It was the sound of a family accustomed to routine, to the rigid structures of their world.
Taking one last breath, Y/N pushed open the door and stepped inside.
The dining room was grand, as always, with high ceilings adorned with intricate frescoes and a long, gleaming table set with the finest china and crystal. Her father, Lord Candela, sat at the head of the table, his expression unreadable as he idly cut into his meat. Her mother sat opposite him, her posture perfect, her hands folded neatly in her lap, her eyes sharp as they flicked up to meet Y/N’s.
“You’re late,” Lady Candela remarked, her tone light but edged with reproach.
Y/N forced a tight smile, lowering herself into the seat that had been prepared for her. “I apologize, Mother. I lost track of time.”
Her mother’s lips pressed into a thin line, but she said nothing more, her gaze lingering on Y/N for a moment before turning back to her plate. The silence that followed was thick and uncomfortable, broken only by the clinking of silverware and the occasional murmur of servants as they moved in and out of the room.
For a few minutes, Y/N focused on her meal, her appetite nonexistent but her movements precise, each cut of the knife and placement of the fork a carefully rehearsed act of decorum. It was a routine she had perfected over the years, a mask she wore to survive these dinners, to navigate the unspoken landmines of her family’s expectations.
But tonight, the weight of that mask felt heavier than ever.
It wasn’t long before her mother broke the silence, her voice smooth but laden with intent. “Y/N, your father and I have spoken, and we believe it is time to move forward with your betrothal.”
Y/N’s fork froze halfway to her mouth, her pulse quickening as she set it down with deliberate care. She had known this conversation was coming—she had felt it looming over her for weeks, like a storm gathering on the horizon. But now that it was here, the reality of it hit her like a blow to the chest.
“Engagement?” she echoed, her voice steady but her heart racing.
Lady Candela nodded, her eyes gleaming with satisfaction as though she had just solved some great puzzle. “Yes. We have received an offer from the Montellini family. Lord Montellini is a man of considerable influence, and his son, Leonardo, is a fine match for you.”
Y/N swallowed hard, her hands gripping the edge of the table as she fought to keep her composure. Leonardo Montellini. She had met him once, at a banquet—a young man with slicked-back hair and an air of arrogance that made her skin crawl. He had looked at her the way one might look at a prized horse at auction, and the thought of spending her life chained to him made her stomach churn.
“Mother, I—” Y/N began, her voice faltering for a moment as she searched for the right words, something that would convey the storm of emotions rising within her without sparking her mother’s ire. “I do not wish to marry Leonardo Montellini.”
Lady Candela’s fork paused, her eyes narrowing slightly as she regarded her daughter. “What you wish is irrelevant, Y/N. This is a matter of duty. Of ensuring the future of our family. You cannot afford to be selfish in this.”
Her father, who had been silent until now, cleared his throat, his deep voice rumbling through the room. “Your mother is right, Y/N. This marriage is important. The Montellini family’s wealth and influence will secure our place in Florence for generations to come.”
Y/N’s heart pounded in her chest, her mind racing as she tried to find a way out, a way to make them understand. But how could she make them see that she couldn’t—wouldn’t—live her life in a cage, bound to a man she didn’t love, trapped in a world that suffocated her?
“I understand the importance of family, Father.” Y/N said carefully, her voice measured, though her hands trembled slightly in her lap. “But I cannot marry a man I do not love. I cannot live my life as something I am not.”
Her mother’s gaze hardened, her lips curling into a faint sneer. “Love,” she scoffed, the word dripping with disdain. “What nonsense. Love is a fleeting thing, Y/N, a frivolous notion for those who have the luxury to indulge in it. We are not those people.”
Y/N’s chest tightened, her breath shallow as she fought to hold back the rising tide of panic. She could feel the walls closing in on her, the future her parents were trying to force upon her looming like a prison, cold and suffocating.
“But I am not you,” she whispered, her voice barely audible, but full of quiet defiance.
The silence that followed was thick, the tension between mother and daughter palpable as they stared at one another across the table. Lady Candela’s expression remained cold, unyielding, but Y/N could see the flicker of frustration in her eyes.
“You will marry Leonardo Montellini,” her mother said at last, her voice like steel. “And you will do so without further complaint. That is the end of this discussion.”
Y/N’s breath caught in her throat, her heart sinking as the weight of her mother’s words settled over her like a heavy shroud. She felt trapped, suffocated by the life they were trying to force her into, and for the first time, she wasn’t sure if she was strong enough to fight it.
As the servants moved quietly around the table, clearing the plates and refilling the wine, Y/N stared down at her hands, her mind racing. She knew she couldn’t do this. She couldn’t marry Leonardo. But how could she escape a future that had already been decided for her?
Her thoughts drifted, unbidden, to Harry—to the quiet strength in his eyes, to the way he had seen her, truly seen her, in a way no one else ever had. There was something in him, something that stirred in her a desire for more—for freedom, for choice, for a life lived on her own terms.
But that life felt impossibly far away, separated by the vast chasm of her family’s expectations and the iron grip of tradition.
And as the dinner dragged on, Y/N sat in silence, her heart heavy with the knowledge that, for now, she was still very much trapped. The clinking of silverware and the quiet hum of conversation felt distant to Y/N, as if she were trapped in a cage of sound, separate from everything around her. Her mother, satisfied that her edict had been given, spoke no more of the engagement. Instead, she shifted her attention to her father, discussing household matters and social engagements as if Y/N’s entire future hadn’t just been decided without her consent.
Y/N’s mind, however, was far from the table. It kept circling back to Harry, to the moments in his studio where, for the first time in her life, she had felt something close to freedom. His presence had stirred something within her—a quiet rebellion, a fire that had been smoldering beneath the surface for so long it had almost gone unnoticed. Until now.
As her mother droned on about the upcoming ball and the importance of making a good impression, Y/N’s fingers tightened around the stem of her wine glass. The thought of standing beside Leonardo Montellini, paraded like a prized possession for Florence’s elite to admire, made her stomach turn. She had seen his eyes on her before—hungry, possessive, as though she were nothing more than a means to an end for him. The Montellinis wanted to solidify their power, and she was the key to that door.
She could feel the bile rising in her throat, the suffocating weight of her family’s expectations pressing down on her like a vice. How many more dinners like this would she endure? How many more nights would she be forced to smile, nod, and pretend that her life was something she could control?
No. She wouldn’t accept this.
“Y/N,” her mother’s voice cut through her thoughts like a blade, sharp and sudden. Y/N blinked, realizing she had been staring down at her untouched plate for far too long. Her mother’s gaze was fixed on her, cool and assessing. “What fare you? You have been rather quiet.”
Y/N looked up, her heart racing as she met her mother’s eyes. For a brief moment, she considered telling her the truth—telling her that she wasn’t well, that she couldn’t bear the thought of marrying Leonardo, that the life they had planned for her was suffocating her.
But the words died in her throat. Her mother would never understand. To Lady Candela, duty was everything, and love was nothing more than a foolish indulgence.
Y/N straightened her spine, steeling herself against the rising tide of emotions that threatened to betray her in front of her family. Her voice, when it finally came, was measured and cool. “I am well, Mother. Merely tired.”
Her mother’s eyes narrowed slightly, but she did not press further, turning her attention back to the meal with a dismissive wave of her hand. Y/N, however, could feel the weight of her father’s gaze lingering on her for just a moment longer. He was quieter than her mother, but no less powerful in his expectations.
The remainder of the dinner passed in a blur, with Y/N’s mind distant from the conversation at the table. As soon as the final course was cleared and her parents rose from their seats, she made her excuses and slipped away, retreating to the sanctuary of her chambers.
Once inside, Y/N locked the door behind her and pressed her back against it, her heart pounding in her chest. The events of the evening, the threat of her future being sealed with a man like Leonardo, weighed heavily on her. She crossed the room to the window, her hands trembling as she gripped the edge of the sill and stared out into the night.
The city of Florence lay before her, bathed in the soft glow of lanterns and moonlight. From her window, it looked peaceful, almost serene, but Y/N knew better. The world outside her family’s palazzo was teeming with life, with freedom that she could only dream of.
And in that world, somewhere amidst the winding streets and narrow alleyways, was Harry.
Her thoughts drifted to him once again, to the way his eyes had softened when he spoke to her, the quiet understanding that passed between them without words. In his studio, she had felt something she had never known before—something raw and unburdened by the chains of her family’s name. It wasn’t just attraction, though she couldn’t deny the pull she felt toward him. It was more than that. It was the promise of escape, of possibility. With him, she could breathe.
Y/N closed her eyes, letting the cool night air wash over her as she made a decision.
She could not stay in this gilded prison any longer. She could not marry Leonardo. She would not be used as a pawn in her family’s games. And if there was anyone who could help her find a way out, it was Harry.
Her heart raced at the thought, a mixture of fear and excitement coursing through her veins. It was reckless, perhaps even dangerous, but she had no other choice. She had to act before it was too late, before her fate was sealed by forces beyond her control.
Without another moment’s hesitation, Y/N slipped into a simple cloak, pulling the hood over her head to shield her face. She moved quickly and quietly, slipping through the darkened corridors of the palazzo until she reached a small, hidden door that led to the courtyard.
As she stepped outside, the cool night air wrapped around her like a cloak of freedom. She paused for a moment, glancing back at the towering walls of her family’s home, the place that had held her captive for so long. And then, with a determined breath, she turned and disappeared into the shadows of the city, her feet carrying her toward Harry’s studio.
The narrow streets of Florence were quiet at this hour, save for the occasional flicker of lamplight or the soft murmur of voices carried on the breeze. Y/N kept her hood low, her steps quick and purposeful as she moved through the labyrinth of alleyways. She had walked these streets before—many times in the dark of night—but tonight felt different. Tonight, the weight of her decision pressed down on her like the stone arches above.
As she neared Harry’s studio, her heart raced with a mixture of anticipation and uncertainty. What was she even doing? She had no plan, no real escape beyond the hope that Harry would understand, that he might offer her a path out of this life she couldn’t bear. A reckless hope, she knew, but it was the only thing she had left.
The studio was tucked away behind a row of trees, secluded from the main roads. The small building, though unremarkable to most, had become a haven for her—one of the few places where she could let go of the expectations that had weighed her down for so long. And Harry, with his quiet strength and sad, knowing eyes, had become the embodiment of the freedom she craved.
As Y/N reached the door, her breath hitched in her chest. She hesitated for a moment, her hand hovering over the handle. What if she had misread everything? What if Harry did not want to be a part of her rebellion, her escape?
Yet she stood at his door anyway.
She pushed the door open, the familiar creak breaking the stillness of the night. Inside, the soft glow of a few candles lit the room, casting long shadows over the walls. The scent of drying oils and turpentine filled the air, mingling with the earthy smell of wet canvas. Harry was at his easel, his back to the door, lost in the rhythm of his work.
For a moment, Y/N stood there, watching him in the golden light. His dark curls fell over his brow, and his hand moved with a kind of precision that made her chest tighten. He was absorbed, unaware of her presence, and the sight of him in his element, so quietly powerful, made her heart ache with something she couldn’t name.
“Harry,” she whispered, her voice barely audible in the stillness.
He froze for a moment, his brush poised in mid-air. Slowly, he turned to face her, his eyes widening in surprise as he took in the sight of her standing there, cloaked in shadow. “Dove?” His voice was soft, but there was an edge of concern in it. “What are you doing here?”
She stepped further into the room, her hands trembling beneath the folds of her cloak. “I had to see you.”
His brow furrowed, and he set his brush down, wiping his hands on a rag before crossing the room toward her. “It’s late. If anyone sees you—”
“I bear no sentiment to it,” she interrupted, her voice sharper than she intended. Her breath came quickly, the weight of everything catching up with her all at once. “I cannot stay there any longer, Harry. I can’t marry Leonardo Montellini. I cannot live that life.”
He studied her for a moment, his green eyes searching hers, and she saw the conflict in his gaze—the pull between wanting to help her and knowing the dangers of what she was asking. “What are you saying, Y/N?” he asked quietly, though there was a heaviness in his tone.
“I’m saying I need to leave. I need to escape before they lock me into a life I never wanted.” Her voice trembled with the intensity of the confession, and she took a step closer to him. “I don’t know where to go or how to do it, but I cannot stay here.”
Harry’s jaw tightened, and for a moment, he said nothing. His eyes flickered with something—worry, perhaps, or fear for what this might mean for both of them. He glanced at the door, then back to her, the weight of her words sinking in.”
“Do you know what you’re asking?” he said, his voice low. “If you leave, there’s no going back. Your family—Florence—”
“I know,” Y/N whispered, her eyes pleading with him to understand. “But what is the alternative? To be sold off to a man who does not care about me? To live my life in a cage, pretending to be something I am not? I cannot bear it, Harry. I won’t.”
He took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair as he tried to process what she was saying. She could see the battle in his eyes, the part of him that wanted to protect her warring with the part that understood the gravity of the situation. “And what do you desire from me?” he asked softly, though she could hear the strain in his voice.
Y/N stepped closer, her heart pounding in her chest as she met his gaze. “I want you to come with me.”
The words hung in the air between them, charged with a kind of desperate hope. She knew it was asking too much, knew that she had no right to pull him into her escape, but in that moment, Harry was the only person she trusted. The only person who understood her enough to help her break free.
Harry’s eyes softened, and for a moment, he looked as though he might say yes. His hand reached out, brushing against hers in a gesture so small, so intimate, it made her chest tighten.
But then he pulled away, shaking his head. “Y/N, I—”
“I know it’s reckless,” she cut him off, her voice filled with a kind of raw vulnerability she hadn’t allowed herself to feel in years. “But I can’t do this alone. I need you.”
Harry’s expression was torn, his hand still hovering near hers as if he wanted to take it, to pull her into his arms and promise her everything. But he didn’t. He couldn’t.
“Y/N,” he whispered, his voice heavy with regret. “If we run, they will come after us. Your family will not let you go so easily. You know this.”
Tears stung at the corners of her eyes, but she blinked them back, refusing to let the weight of his words crush her hope. “Then we’ll be careful. We’ll go somewhere they can’t find us. Please, Harry.” Her voice broke, and she reached out, gripping his arm as though she could will him to say yes. “I know not of heaven nor hell. I know not of Lucifer or God, I know only what I see before me, and If i were to draw my last breath tomorrow, I would perish with all this regret—my soul bound to my grave for eternity.”
For a long moment, Harry didn’t move. He stood there, staring down at her with an expression so conflicted it made her heart ache. And then, finally, he sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly in defeat.
“We’ll need to leave before first light,” he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. “Pack only what y’can carry.”
Y/N’s breath caught in her throat, a mixture of relief and disbelief washing over her as his words sank in. “You’ll come with me?”
Harry met her gaze, and though his eyes were filled with uncertainty, there was a quiet determination in them as well. “Wherever.” He murmured. “But we must be careful.”
A flood of emotions rushed through Y/N all at once—relief, fear, gratitude, and something else she couldn’t quite name. She threw her arms around him, burying her face in his chest as tears of both joy and fear slipped down her cheeks.
“Thank you,” she whispered, her voice muffled against him. “Thank you, Harry.”
He held her for a moment, his hand resting on the back of her head as if trying to steady them both in the face of what they were about to do. “We shall figure it out,” he said quietly, though she could hear the weight of the uncertainty in his voice.
But for the first time in what felt like forever, Y/N believed him.
As they stood there in the quiet of the studio, the world outside slowly fading into darkness, Y/N felt a small spark of hope flicker to life within her. She didn’t know what the future would hold, but for now, she wasn’t alone.
*
The night air outside the palazzo was thick with the scent of jasmine and damp stone, but to Y/N, it felt more like freedom than anything else. The distant sounds of Florence, the murmur of distant conversations and the soft rush of water from the Arno, filled the silence as she made her way through the narrow streets, her bag slung over her shoulder. Her heart raced, but her steps were sure now. This was her choice, her rebellion.
The moon hung high in the sky, casting its pale light over the winding alleys and quiet courtyards as Y/N hurried back to Harry’s studio. Her thoughts were a whirlwind—but she couldn’t think of it now. The only thing that mattered was what lay ahead. She had to believe that there was a life waiting for her beyond the walls of Florence, beyond the expectations that had shackled her for so long. And with Harry by her side, perhaps—just perhaps—she could find it.
As she reached the secluded courtyard where Harry’s studio stood, Y/N’s breath caught in her throat. The small building was bathed in moonlight, its wooden door slightly ajar, as if waiting for her. She paused for a moment, her hand resting on the doorframe, listening to the soft rustle of the wind in the olive trees.
Inside, the studio was quiet, save for the gentle flicker of the remaining candle on the windowsill. Harry stood at the far end of the room, packing his own bag—his movements careful and deliberate. When he heard her enter, he turned, his eyes immediately meeting hers. There was no need for words; he could see the decision in her gaze, the finality of it. She was here, and there was no going back.
“You are prepared?” His voice was soft, but there was an edge of tension there, a quiet understanding of what they were about to do.
Y/N nodded, her fingers tightening around the strap of her bag. “I am.”
Harry’s eyes softened as he crossed the room toward her, his hand reaching out to brush against her arm in a gesture of comfort. “We shall be leaving soon. I’ve made arrangements to head south, toward Siena. s’not far, but far enough. We will be out of reach, at least for now.”
Siena. The name sounded distant and unfamiliar to Y/N, but it didn’t matter. Anywhere was better than here, better than the fate that awaited her if she stayed. She met Harry’s gaze, a flicker of gratitude in her eyes as she nodded.
“I trust you,” she whispered, the weight of her words hanging in the air between them.
Harry held her gaze for a moment longer, his green eyes full of that quiet, steady strength that had always made her feel safe. “Then we’ll make it through this,” he said softly. “Together.”
He moved to the door, pulling it fully open and stepping outside into the cool night air. Y/N followed close behind, her heart pounding in her chest as the reality of what they were about to do sank in. They were running. Not just from Florence, but from the lives they had known, from the expectations and the rules that had governed them for so long.
The streets of Florence stretched out before them, dark and silent, like a sleeping beast. They would have to move quickly, before the city woke, before her family realized she was gone. Harry led the way, his pace measured but urgent as they slipped through the narrow alleyways, avoiding the more well-lit streets where guards might patrol.
Y/N kept her hood pulled low over her face, her heart racing with every step they took. She glanced over her shoulder more than once, half-expecting to see her father or Leonardo rounding the corner, chasing her down. But the streets were empty, save for the occasional whisper of the wind.
They moved in silence, the weight of their decision hanging heavy between them, but there was no hesitation now. They had crossed the line, and there was no turning back.
It wasn’t long before they reached the outskirts of the city, where the walls of Florence loomed high above them, casting long shadows over the ground. The gates were closed, but Harry had anticipated this. He led Y/N to a small passageway, hidden between the stones and covered with vines. It was narrow, barely wide enough for one person at a time, but it led out of the city—an old smuggler’s route, known only to a few.
“This way.” Harry whispered, glancing over his shoulder to make sure they hadn’t been followed.
Y/N nodded, following him through the narrow gap in the wall, her heart pounding in her chest as they squeezed through the passage. The air was cooler on the other side, the scent of the open countryside replacing the dense smell of the city. When they finally emerged, they found themselves on a small, winding road that led away from Florence, disappearing into the hills beyond.
Y/N paused for a moment, turning back to look at the city she was leaving behind. The towering domes and spires of Florence rose into the night sky, bathed in moonlight. It was beautiful—so beautiful it made her chest ache. But it was also a prison, a place that had tried to shape her into something she could never be.
She turned back to Harry, her breath catching as she realized the full weight of what they had done. They were free. But freedom came with a price—a price they had only just begun to pay.
Harry met her gaze, his expression soft but serious. “There’s no going back now,” he said quietly, as if reading the thoughts running through her mind.
Y/N nodded, her hand instinctively reaching for his, their fingers brushing in the cool night air. “I know,” she whispered. “And I am ready.”
Together, they turned and started down the road, leaving Florence behind them—its walls, its expectations, its suffocating weight—everything. The future was uncertain, full of dangers and unknowns. But for the first time in her life, Y/N felt a spark of hope flicker within her. She was free. And with Harry by her side, perhaps—just perhaps—she could build a life that was truly her own.
As they walked through the quiet countryside, the stars above them shining like tiny, distant beacons, Y/N knew that they were only at the beginning of their journey. There would be challenges ahead, and dangers they couldn’t yet foresee. But for now, she allowed herself to breathe in the cool night air, to feel the weight of the past slowly lift from her shoulders.
She glanced at Harry, his face illuminated by the soft glow of the moon, and felt a sense of calm wash over her. Whatever lay ahead, they would face it together. And that, she thought, was more than enough.
It had been two days since they left Florence behind, and the journey had been long, filled with the quiet tension of fear that someone might catch up to them, might discover their flight. The sun had dipped low on the horizon, casting long shadows across the rolling hills as Y/N and Harry approached a small inn nestled at the edge of a sleepy village. The inn was humble, tucked between groves of olive trees and fields dotted with grazing sheep. It wasn’t much—just a small stone building with weathered shutters and a modest stable for travelers’ horses—but it was enough. For the first time since leaving the city, they could breathe.
Inside, the inn was warm, the smell of bread baking in the hearth mingling with the faint scent of wood smoke. The innkeeper, a woman with kind eyes and silver streaks in her hair, greeted them with little more than a nod, motioning them toward the narrow staircase that led to their room.
As they climbed the stairs, the weight of the past two days seemed to settle over Y/N like a heavy cloak. The adrenaline that had carried her through the journey was fading, replaced by the quiet realization of what they had done. They had left everything behind—their lives, their families, their very identities—and now, here they were, standing on the precipice of a future they had yet to define.
Their room was small, with a single window that overlooked the fields beyond the village. A modest bed stood against one wall, and a small wooden table with two chairs sat near the hearth. The fire had already been lit, the flames flickering softly in the dim light of the evening.
Harry set their bags down by the door, glancing around the room before turning to Y/N. His expression was calm, but there was a tension in his eyes—a quiet awareness that they had crossed a line they could never uncross.
Y/N crossed the room to the window, her fingers brushing against the cool glass as she looked out at the fading light. The sky was a deep, dusky blue, and the first stars were beginning to appear, faint and far away. For a moment, she said nothing, her thoughts swirling like leaves caught in the wind.
Y/N finally broke the silence, her voice soft and uncertain. "Do you think we made the right choice?"
Harry turned from the window, his gaze settling on her. His green eyes, illuminated by the firelight, were filled with something unreadable-fear, perhaps, but also a quiet determination. He stepped closer, the floorboards creaking beneath his boots as he walked toward her.
"There was no other choice, Y/N.” He said gently, kneeling beside her. His hand reached out, his fingers brushing lightly against hers, grounding her in the reality of their shared decision. "Not for you, not for me. Remaining in Florence..it would have destroyed you.”
She looked up at him, her heart aching with the weight of his words. "But what have we done, Harry?" she whispered “I–” her voice trembling. "I have abandoned my family, my name. What if they find us? What if–" Her words trailed off, the enormity of their flight catching up with her. Her thoughts tangled in Fear. Fear of what might come, fear of the unknown future they now faced together.
Harry's gaze softened, and he took her hand fully in his, his thumb brushing over her knuckles in a soothing motion. "I do not know what will come," he admitted, his voice low and steady. "But I know that staying in Florence vould have been a life you could not live. You would have been chained, Y/N, to a life of duty, of expectations that would have suffocated you. What we have now, it may be uncertain, but it is ours."
She blinked, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. "And you, Harry? What have you given up for me?"
Harry smiled faintly, shaking his head as if the question was unnecessary. "Florence never belonged to me.” He murmured. "| painted for men who looked down on me, for families who never saw what I could truly do. l've left behind nothing of importance." He paused, his gaze deepening as he looked into her eyes. "But y–you are the first thing that's ever felt real to me."
Y/N's breath caught at his words, her heart thudding in her chest. She had never expected this-never imagined that leaving Florence would mean finding something, someone, who saw her not as the Candela daughter but as herself, YN, in all her flawed and wild glory. "And what do we do now?" she asked quietly, her voice barely above a whisper. "We are not nobility here, Harry. We bear no titles, no claims to protect us."
Harry stood then, his hand still holding hers as he pulled her gently to her feet. His expression softened, though there was a hint of something deeper in his eyes, something that made her pulse quicken. "We live Y/N.” he said simply, his voice low and intimate. “For the first time, we live as we choose. I have land in Siena, now—it isn’t much, but it’s a roof and four walls.”
He drew her closer, their bodies inches apart, the warmth from the fire mingling with the heat of his presence. Y/N could feel her heart pounding in her chest, her breath hitching as his gaze settled on her lips for a brief, tantalizing moment. “You are free now.” Harry murmured, his voice a whisper in the quiet of the room. "Whatever comes next, we face it together."
Y/N swallowed hard, the weight of his words settling deep within her. She could feel the walls between them crumbling, the barriers they had built around themselves dissolving in the heat of the fire. And as she looked up at him, her heart in her throat, she knew that whatever lay ahead, she wanted him beside her—no matter the cost.
Slowly, tentatively, she reached up, her fingers brushing against his jaw, feeling the roughness of his stubble beneath her touch. Harry inhaled sharply, his hand sliding to her waist, pulling her closer still. The air between them seemed to crackle, the unspoken tension that had simmered for so long finally rising to the surface. "Y/N," he breathed, his voice thick with emotion. "Are you sure?"
She nodded, drawing her lips closer to his. Their kiss is slow, appreciative—full of months that had gone without it. He cupped her cheek as he parted briefly, holding her eyes into her own before he smiled. Harry's lips crashed against hers in a fierce, desperate kiss, his hands tangling in her hair as he pulled her closer still. Y/N gasped against his mouth, her fingers gripping his tunic as the heat of the fire surrounded them, enveloping them in warmth. The kiss deepened, becoming something raw, something that spoke of all the things they had left unsaid —their fear, their hope, their unspoken love.
They stumbled back toward the hearth, their bodies pressed together as Harry's hands roamed over her, pulling at the ties of her gown, freeing her from the constraints of fabric. Y/N's breath hitched as the cool air touched her bare skin, but Harry's warmth, his touch, was all she needed. He held her close, his lips tracing a path down her neck, sending shivers of pleasure through her body.
The heat between them became unbearable, a fire that consumed all reason. Harry's hands moved with purpose, deftly undoing the ties of Y/ N's gown, his fingertips brushing against her skin with a tenderness that belied the hunger in his gaze. Her breath came in shallow gasps as the fabric fell away, baring her to him. His eyes, darkened with desire, roamed over her with reverence, as though he was seeing her not as a woman of noble birth, but as someone entirely his, a secret kept only for him.
Her pulse quickened under the weight of his gaze, and her hands, trembling slightly, moved to the front of his tunic. She tugged at the laces, fumbling as her fingers brushed the hard planes of his chest beneath the linen. Harry let out a low groan, his own need palpable in the way his breath hitched, the way his body responded to her touch. He shrugged out of his tunic, tossing it aside, revealing the lean, muscled form that had been hidden beneath.
For a moment, they simply stood there, the space between them charged with a tension that was nearly unbearable. The firelight flickered across their skin, casting shadows that danced along the stone walls of the inn, but all Y/N could focus on was Harry—the way his chest rose and fell with each labored breath, the way his eyes darkened as they traced the curves of her body. Her heart pounded in her chest as she reached for him, her hands sliup his arms, feeling the strength in his muscles. Their breaths mingled, and as Harry leaned in to kiss her, the tension between them reached a breaking point. His lips were soft but insistent, claiming hers with a need that mirrored her own.
Y/N's hands found his hair, pulling him closer, desperate to feel him against her, to erase the distance that had always lingered between them until now.
He guided her down onto the fur-lined rug before the fire, his hands caressing her with a tenderness that made her breath catch. The warmth of the flames flickered around them, casting their shadows on the walls, but in this moment, there was only the heat between them, the way their bodies fit together as if they had been made for this. They had stripped away the layers of propriety, both figuratively and literally, leaving only the raw desire that now pulsed between them. Y/N's heart raced as Harry’s body hovered over hers, his eyes dark with a hunger she had never seen before. Her skin flushed under his gaze, the anticipation swirling in her belly like a storm.
He kissed her softly, his lips moving against hers with a tenderness that made her melt into him, but there was something else in his touch—something deeper, something more primal. As his hands roamed her body, tracing every curve and dip, Y/N felt a strange mix of excitement and nerves coiling inside her. She had never known this kind of intimacy before, never been touched in such a way.
Harry pulled back slightly, his breath warm against her neck as he pressed a trail of soft, lingering kisses down her throat, over her collarbone, and lower still, to the curve of her breasts. His hands slid down her sides, gently parting her legs as he kissed his way lower, leaving a trail of fire in his wake. Y/N's breath hitched, her body trembling beneath his touch, and she instinctively pressed her thighs together.
Harry paused, his lips hovering just above her skin, his hands still resting on her hips as he looked up at her with a soft, knowing smile. "Do you trust me?" he asked, his voice low, rough with desire but tender, too.
Y/N nodded, her breath trembling as she met his gaze, the flickering firelight casting shadows across his face. “I do, H." She whispered.
Harry's smile deepened, and he pressed a soft kiss to her inner thigh, his hands gently coaxing her legs apart once more. "I got you, dove. Promise.” He murmured, his voice a quiet, confident assurance that sent a shiver of anticipation through her.
Y/N's pulse quickened as Harry kissed his way higher, his lips brushing her skin in a way that made her body ache with a need she had never known before. Her hands gripped the fur beneath her as his mouth hovered just above her most intimate place, and when his lips finally made contact, a gasp escaped her, her body tensing with the unfamiliar sensation. It was unlike anything she had ever felt—a warmth, a softness, and then the slow, deliberate flick of his tongue against her bud, sending a jolt of pleasure through her core.
Y/N's head fell back, her breath catching in her throat as Harry continued, his mouth working with skill and precision. He moved with confidence, as though he knew exactly what she needed, exactly how to coax the pleasure from her body.
Harry's hands slid up her thighs, his fingers pressing gently into her skin, grounding her in the moment. His tongue moved in slow, teasing strokes, building a rhythm that made Y/N's body tremble with each touch. Her hips moved instinctively toward him, a soft moan escaping her lips as the pleasure began to build, layer upon layer, each stroke of his tongue pushing her closer to a place she had never been.
"Harry," she gasped, her voice breathless, her fingers tangling in his hair as she arched her back, the heat between her legs overwhelming. She had never imagined this kind of pleasure, had never known it was even possible.
Harry hummed softly against her, the vibrations sending another wave of pleasure through her as his tongue moved faster, more insistently. His hands gripped her hips, pulling her closer to his mouth, and Y/N's entire body shuddered with the intensity of it, her breath coming in ragged gasps. The world around her blurred, the crackle of the fire fading into the background as she became lost in the sensation of his mouth, his tongue, his touch.
The tension in her belly coiled tighter and tighter, the pleasure building with every movement of his lips, every flick of his tongue. Y/N had never felt anything like it before—this burning, all-consuming need that made her body tremble, her breath catch, her heart race. She was on the edge, teetering between control and surrender, and with one final, skilled movement of his tongue, she fell.
A cry tore from her lips as the pleasure crested, washing over her in waves that left her breathless, her body trembling beneath him. Her fingers tightened in his hair, her hips lifting off the rug as the pleasure pulsed through her, intense and overwhelming. Harry didn't stop, his mouth working her through the height of her release, his hands holding her steady as she writhed beneath him, lost in the sensation.
When the waves of pleasure finally began to ebb, Y/N collapsed back onto the rug, her body spent, her chest rising and falling with each ragged breath. Her limbs felt heavy, her skin flushed and sensitive, and as Harry pressed a final, soft kiss to her inner thigh, she shivered, her body still tingling from the intensity of it all.
Slowly, Harry rose, his hands sliding up her body as he kissed his way back up to her lips, his breath warm and soft against her skin. He settled beside her, pulling her into his arms, his lips brushing her forehead as she nestled against his chest, her heart still pounding from the intensity of her release. “Told you I had you, hm?” He cooed, combing his fingers through her disheveled hair.
She nodded, the sound of her heart thumping in her ears as she cupped his cheek, pulling him into another kiss. His hands roamed from her hips to her breasts, rolling back on top of her with a smirk. His hands roamed her body, caressing, exploring, a though trying to commit every inch of her to memory.
Y/N arched beneath him, her body responding to his touch with a need that had been building for weeks, months even. She wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer, desperate for the connection she had longed for, and Harry groaned, his body trembling with the weight of his desire. Slowly, reverently, he guided himself into her, his movements gentle, careful, as though afraid to break the fragile spell between them. She gasped at the sensation, her fingers gripping his shoulders as he filled her, their bodies finally coming together in a way that felt inevitable, as if they had been meant for this moment all along.
For a heartbeat, they stayed like that, perfectly still, their breaths mingling, their hearts pounding in unison. He was entranced by the feeling of her walls fluttering around his cock, the way she stretched around him.
Then, slowly, Harry began to move, his hips rocking against hers in a rhythm that sent waves of pleasure coursing through her body. Y/N’s head fell back further into the rug, a moan escaping her lips as she gave herself over to the sensation, to the connection that seemed to bind them together more deeply than any words ever could.
Harry's movements were slow at first, deliberate, each thrust sending a jolt of pleasure through her body, but soon the restraint he had tried to maintain began to slip. His pace quickened, his body moving against hers with a raw, desperate need that matched her own. The sound of their breathing, of their bodies moving together, filled the room, mingling with the crackle of the fire and the whisper of the wind outside.
Y/N's fingers dug into his back, her nails leaving faint marks on his skin as her body arched beneath him, her breath coming in gasps. Every touch, every kiss, every thrust was a promise, a declaration that neither of them could speak but both understood.
"Harry," she whispered, her voice trembling with the intensity of her need, with the overwhelming sensation building inside her. "I–” But she couldn't finish the sentence. Words seemed inadequate to describe what she felt, the way her body and soul seemed to be unraveling in his arms.
Harry's lips found hers again, silencing her with a kiss that was all-consuming, his body moving against hers with an urgency that mirrored her own. He groaned against her mouth, his breath ragged, his hands gripping her hips as though afraid to let her go. “Y’like that, huh?” He grunted, bottoming out with each thrust. “Sound so pretty, the way you sing f’me.”
She nodded, eyes glossed over in pleasure as she wraps her arms around his neck, burying her face in his shoulder with whimpers of praises. And then, with one final, desperate thrust, Y/N felt herself fall over the edge, her body trembling with release as the pleasure crashed over her like a wave. She cried out, her fingers tangled in his curls, her heart pounding in her chest as the world seemed to fall away around her.
In that moment, Harry pulled away, his breath hot against her neck as he pressed his forehead against her shoulder, his body shuddering with restraint. His hands tightened on her hips as he pulled back, separating them just before the inevitable.
A moan fell from his lips, and Y/N swore it was the prettiest melody she’s ever heard.
He fisted his cock, coaxing his hand back and forth before he lets out a low whimper, spilling himself right onto her abdomen—decorating her in opaque that marked her as his.
His sigh was heavy as he fell back beside her, placing a kiss to her temple as she lie there breathlessly. For a moment, they lay there in the quiet, their bodies still trembling from the intensity of it all, the only sound in the room the soft crackling of the fire. Y/N's chest rose and fell with the aftershocks of pleasure, her heart still racing, but she felt safe. “S’warm.” She giggled, his release glistening in the flames of the fire.
He couldn’t help but smile as he maneuvered his arm beneath her neck, turning to his side as he rested his chin atop her head. “Promise I’ll clean y’up.” He chuckled, draping his other arm across her chest, to which she reaches up and holds his bicep with a smile.
He presses a kiss into her hair, breathing her in. “Ad vitam aeternam.” He murmured, listening to the fire crackle and her even breaths.
Her eyebrows furrowed, recognizing some of the words but she figured the meanings are different, because what she interpreted made no sense at all. He tilted her head back, looking at the man expectantly as he shifted his own head ever so slightly to place a soft kiss against her lips. “To eternal life.”
Her cheeks flushed as she stared into him, the color almost as red as the cherries from the other day. She runs her fingers through his curls, a small smile spreading across her lips.
His own eyes searches hers, the tips of their nose almost touching. His hands cup her face, thumbing gentle strokes onto her cheek. “What?”
She lied her hand atop the one on her face, dipping the tips of her fingers to hold onto his grasp. “I’m falling in love with you.”
He exhales through his nose, a chuckle laced with content emitting from his mouth. He nudges his nose with hers, brushing their lips together softly before pressing it into a kiss. He smiles, pulling back after a beat. “I already have.”
#harry styles#harry edward styles#harry styles blurb#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles imagine#harry styles one shot#harry styles writing#harry styles concept#harry styles x reader#harry styles au#harry styles prince#harry styles royal#harry styles fan#harry styles fanfic#harry styles smut#harry styles angst#harry styles fluff
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old money, old soul
༄ you loved him in a different lifetime; and your soul yearns for him.
༄ modern aegon ii targaryen x reader
was it possible there was a lifetime where you'd loved so dearly; felt the tender brush of his hands on your skin as he touches upon you, basked in his reverent gaze, brimming with so much awe and wonder that you could almost taste it on your lips?
it wasn't the first time you'd woke with a start— clutching a hand to your chest as short, gasps of breath leaves you, a feeling of emptiness and hurt overwhelming all sense of reason as you mourn for the silver haired man in your dreams.
he was so beautiful yet so melancholy. a boy, barely a man in your earliest dreams, yet his eyes were devastating in it's sadness. oh, but he was all the same yours. you held him in your arms as he wept in his grievance of being unloved, of the circumstances which he was born into.. he would tell you his fears, and you would soothe him with the gentlest hand he's had all his life. you would tell him you love him dearly, and he would know you meant every word because you had the same heart.
you were his reprieve. his world kept in soltitude, free from the intrigues of the court and his family that were bent in taking everything good in his life. no crown, or titles, or coin could ever compare to you. you held his world in your tiny hands, and his entire being; every good that were left in him was in you.
in your little home, he was no prince. he talked of his interests with the outmost heart. he laughed freely, with his head thrown back, with a genuine and free spirit, without all the burdens of his mother's expectations and without the fear of being hunted down and chased for his claim. in your home, he was not unloved. he was adored, and praised. he was comforted and held like he deserved.
he loved you. passionately. with his whole heart. he uttered promises of his devotion to your skin, building you up in the most sinful way possible, until you were melting in his arms... he adored you so. aegon adored you so.
that ache in your chest festers like a untreated wound; oh aegon. your sweet love, who would beg for you to never leave him. to never part with him, mouth full of your name in his breathy, pleading gasps. only in this dream, his eyes were filled with nothing but tears, his devastation plain as a day as he held you in his shaking arms, crying out your promises to one another. refusing to believe you'd part from him.
as everything good in his life, they'd found you. those who wish to harm him were countless, but he cared little about anything to warrant a reaction so visceral, he declared himself king to avenge you.
the maiden in the forest.
he was unwilling. so unwilling that he refused to believe you'd never come back to him. so unwilling that he heaves, struggles to breath as he pressed his cheek into your pale face, undeterred by all the blood, "promise me we will never part." his voice was low, different from the many times before but altogether, the same. "tell me we would never part, my love. tell me." he begs.
"we would never part." you vow, cupping his cheek, your touch was fleeting, "i shall find you in every life time." you whisper, fingers curling around his silver strands with meager strength.
"i will have only you..."
you peel back the covers, padding your way into the bathroom. in your reflection, it was evident that you had woke crying, your eyes were swollen and red from the dreams. or were they memories? could you even differentiate from memories and your real life anymore? were you so... lonely that you'd taken into dreaming for a man who's devotion to you transcends lifetimes?
you were unsure. but you'd wandered into the kitchen, many times that month, staring blankly at nothing in particular, hoping the yearning leaves.
"are you sure you're okay?" the soft, worried voice came from behind you, and you looked back to see your dear friend in the dim light of the kitchen, looking incredibly worried. "are the dreams still bothering you?" helaena places a hand on your shoulder.
you shrug your shoulders, "they don't bother me, ena."
"yet you sit at our kitchen, depressed beyond reason everytime." she respond, playfully. "we need a new routine." helaena tuts.
"you're not about to drag me into your lavish summer home." you warn, glimpsing the mischievous light in her eyes. she'd often clamored for you to join her and her family's summers in a sunny villa somewhere in italy.
so you've heard there's never a dull moment, with several children from her father's marriages, and general family affairs. helaena was as mild mannered as they could come, but even she comes back from summers spent with the rest of her family smoking to ease some tension. you'd held her drunk ass up enough times to know her family spelled nothing but chaos.
"oh, i'm about to do exactly that." helaena nods, grabbing onto your arm with a grip that has your reeling.
#aegon targaryen x reader#hotd x reader#hotd x you#hotd x y/n#hotd#aegon ii targaryen x reader#aegon ii targaryen x you#aegon ii targaryen x female reader#aegon targaryen x you#aegon targaryen#aegon ii targaryen#aegon ii x reader#aegon ii x you#hotd aegon#house of the dragon
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Oh god please write the timebomb fic!!! (or several lol)
ೀ pairing: ekko/jinx
ೀ wc: 5k
ೀ summary: "Always a dance with you, huh?" Or: two years after the battle versus Noxus, Ekko receives an unexpected visitor.
ೀ author notes: ask and you shall receive!!! I wrote this in one sitting in some weird ass haze and barely edited it, but this is the most fun I had in a long while so I hope you enjoy!!!
ೀ read it on ao3 | listen to the playlist
The first few days after the battle, Ekko doesn’t rest. He barely sleeps or eats, or allows himself time to think.
He can’t.
There’s too much to do. The dead are in their dozens. His Firelights took a major hit, and he knows that for the next few months his fingers will be numb from painting their pictures on the mural day in and out. So many who could have lived but didn’t. So many could have had better futures. But if he just runs, if he keeps pushing on, he can outrun these regrets and his grief, too. This way, he doesn’t remember Vi’s heartbroken expression when she pulled him into a bone-crushing hug after the fight, blood and sweat still clinging to her, her words choked when she told him—
Four seconds.
He could have saved her. He would have hauled her snarky ass out of that tunnel, ripped that bomb from her hands. He would have—
He runs from those thoughts, too. They suffocate him, and Ekko has too much to fix to be suffocated by his grief right now.
He sure as hell didn’t fight for Piltover. He fought for Zaun, for Firelights. Because he knew Ambessa Medarda would never settle for anything other than complete subjugation. She would have destroyed Ekko’s home. She was already busy murdering and imprisoning their people, and nothing but complete eradication would have followed in her wake.
Ekko did it for… her. The blue-haired symbol of defiance, of uprising. A loud declaration that they won’t live under Piltover’s oppression forever, that they’ll reach greater things one day and won’t be silenced. They won’t wait for permission to breathe again. It’s what she would have wanted, he convinces himself, even though part of him knows Jinx would have enjoyed the chaos of the fight more. Or maybe not. Not since that little girl. Not since he had to save her from herself over and over again, only to lose her anyway.
Undercity mourns her. Her visage is everywhere. Jinx the Saviour. She would have hated it, he thinks wryly. She never got to see just how loved she was.
Maybe he should have grabbed her and ran away. Maybe he should have let the world go to hell and saved her instead. The thought, born of fatigue, lingers only for a few fleeting seconds, a rare moment of selfishness amidst a day spent fixing the world around him.
Maybe, maybe, maybe. If only he had tried harder when they were kids and saved her from Silco. If only he didn’t give up on her.
She’s always been his biggest maybe. And now they’ll never be more. Not this version of them. Never him and her as they were.
Aw, are you gonna mope now, boy saviour?
“You’re not here.”
It punches clean through his chest. The realisation of it. The sheer, horrible weight. He’ll never see her again.
Constants and variables, Benzo told him once. Constants and variables, young Ekko.
A week after the battle versus Noxus, Ekko sinks to his knees inside his room, exhausted and heartbroken, and sobs.
.
Things begin to settle. Slowly, at first, the city might have been gutted after the battle but not destroyed, the morale low but hopeful. Hexgates are gone, and Ekko is glad when he finds out. He doesn’t want to see or hear anything about the arcane for a while. No magic in the world could fix the pain festering in his chest.
Sevika, Silco’s old second-in-command and once his sworn enemy, comes to him two weeks after the attack.
“They’re making me a council member,” she says, grunting when she falls into the tiny wooden chair inside his room.
She’s always been a threatening figure, power rippling from every shift of her body, but Ekko isn’t sure he wants to fight anyone right now. Nor does she seem interested in strangling him. She lights a cigarette, her scarred features set in a fearsome scowl.
“And?” he asks for anything better to say. “How is that any of my business?”
Sevika exhales through her nose, reminding him of an angry bull, all smoke and steely resolve. “I’m the only one presenting Zaun or her interests.”
Ekko almost rolls his eyes. Of course she is. The Council is simply falling over themselves to fix the situation. After months of harassment and oppression, false arrestments and beatings, they asked them to bleed for Piltover and its interests with nothing but the bare minimum courtesy extended towards them afterwards.
“I could use you, kid,” Sevika continues, and Ekko forces his anger away, loosening his fists. “Exactly for that reaction. You’re smart as hell, and been a pain in my ass for years. Pilties will try to walk all over us again in a few months’ time. You and I both know it. We gotta beat them in their own game. Not let them silence us again. I could use someone like you. Be my adviser. You’ll have a direct line to the Council. We’ll make an actual change. It’s better than whatever this is.”
Ekko’s expression sours at her words while Sevika’s gaze flicks around his room in contemplation. He works all day to a point of exhaustion, then passes out. It’s the only way he’s been able to continue, day in and day out. Being in a leadership position means you can’t take time off to grieve. Too many people are relying on him. It’s bad enough that he accidentally abandoned his people for months without meaning to. The guilt he still feels over everything has been nearly suffocating.
It’s a good gig, hero! You should do it and be a thorn in her side.
Ekko blinks the flash of blue from his vision, rubbing his brow just as Sevika adds: “It’s what she would have wanted, you know.”
A jolt of electricity runs through him. Everyone, even Vi, has been avoiding mentioning Jinx in front of him.
His jaw clenches. “You don’t know that.”
“Kid, I know what not letting go looks like,” she says, and it almost sounds compassionate, or as close to it as someone like her can get. “We had our differences in the past, I know as much—”
“You killed my people,” Ekko snaps. “Do you know how many lives you destroyed with Shimmer?”
“Sure do,” she replies listlessly, smoke billowing past her lips. “I won’t try to justify my actions to you. But y’know, when you were gone, Jinx united Zaun in a way I haven’t seen since Vander. Beats me how she did it, but people believed in her. Even your Firelights.”
It mirrors everything he’s seen and heard for weeks. Jinx freeing their people, Jinx the Saviour, the beacon for their new future. The one who set and lived by extreme examples, who made Piltover back off and take the Undercity seriously. Because they all finally realised that there can never be peace without a fight. She should be here to fight this battle with him. Ekko should be busy arguing with her that blowing up another building will not make things right. He shouldn’t be walking around with her ghost a step behind him, tormenting him with ideas of what could and should have been.
“And now she’s dead!”
His ears ring, his chest heaves, and he clutches his thudding heart, willing it back in its cage. He didn’t mean to come undone so easily.
“Yeah. Yeah, she is,” Sevika says, and there’s a grimness to her when she says it, an unexpected pain buried somewhere deep in her gruff voice that makes Ekko see her differently. “I get it.”
“No,” he whispers, pained. “You don’t.”
.
Seven months pass before Ekko finally picks up a brush for her.
He sleeps better at night but not without nightmares. Not without remembering Powder from the alternative universe and how they danced. How sweet her kiss felt. Not without that memory smearing to finding Jinx with a grenade in her hand, again, ready to disappear, go somewhere he could never reach her.
Ekko still hears the detonation in his ears, over and over, on a sickening loop. His mind likes to torture him with ideas he failed to save her. That no matter what he does, or how he mends time, she’s forever out of reach. His blue beacon, his lighthouse he can never find in the depthless ocean of reality.
Many have drawn her, but he still thinks that no one knows the exact hue of her hair or the wicked shine in her eyes better than him. He’s spent an entire lifetime examining them, looking for them in a sea of thousands.
Their city is rebuilding. He agreed to Sevika’s request after a few days of contemplation. Caitlyn Kiramman’s expression when he ambled into the Council room was worth the additional burden now on his shoulder. But she’s changed too, matured, and now fills her position as the Council’s leader well.
Ekko won’t forget how she allowed his friends to be imprisoned, tortured, and, in some cases, killed, but her regret made her side with him and Sevika more often than not during voting, and maybe he could at least one day forgive her. Another maybe. For Vi, if nothing else, who clearly loves the blue-haired woman fiercely.
The barren wall stares at him. He’s painted Powder before, but this is different. One day, his friend, his dearest friend, was simply gone. Without a goodbye, in a wake of tragedy. The life Ekko once had disintegrated beneath his feet overnight. Benzo killed. Vander dead. Mylo and Claggor too. Vi died as well. Or so he believed for years. Powder was missing until a different knife was delivered to him weeks later, when the word on the street spread about Silco being seen with a little girl with blue hair.
Ekko sighs, hanging his head. The city is healing, but he isn’t, or at least not as quickly.
He runs his hand over the white wall, picturing Jinx as he saw her last, those precious hours between talking her down from the abyss and their joint attack on Noxian forces. It felt so good to rely on her again, to stand with her, side by side. As natural as breathing.
You’re the order to my chaos, hero.
“Leave me alone,” he says quietly, head hung low. “It’s been months.”
A figment of Jinx chortles, arms crossed over her chest as she leans back against the wall. You would get bored to death without me. Ha! Get it?
Shooting a glare at her, Ekko picks up a brush, his fingers quivering. Tears burn in his eyes when he dips the brush into the paints he painstakingly mixed. He works, and works, until his eyes are dry and his wrist hurts. Ekko doesn’t stop until he loses light and when he steps back, he is looking at Jinx. Equal parts chaos and something ethereal.
He wipes angrily across his mouth when he tastes saltiness pooling there and goes home.
There’s no sleep that night.
.
Time is a strange thing. It weaves and flows. Without his Z-Drive, he has no control over it. Time simply goes on, and he’s the passenger in a vehicle he doesn’t want to move.
He’s important these days. He’s one of the few bright minds still left, and he’s endlessly busy with something. City of Progress needs every mind that can be spared. Wounds heal, and time dulls the memory, but not everything is so easily forgotten. Piltover moves quicker, but the Undercity erects a statue for Jinx beside Vander’s. He sees Vi at the ceremony, and they exchange strained smiles. They speak sometimes, but it’s not as often as it used to be. They’re both dealing with their grief the best they can.
At least Vi has Cait. Ekko has nothing but a cold bed and purpose.
He and Sevika make a good team. It almost makes him wonder what could have been in a universe where they were on the same side from the start. His Zaun, cracked but not broken, is resembling the bright version of the Zaun and Piltover he saw in the alternative verse. There're years of work still left, but there’s something like hope in him, fragile and misplaced as it might be.
A year passes. Then two. He visits the graves; he lights candles for those lost. Some days Ekko sees her, other days he doesn’t. He hopes for a glimpse, even when he knows he shouldn’t. It should be easier to let go of what you never had, right?
His mural for Jinx grows. Other faces join her, people who died believing in her, surrounding the one they placed their trust in. And, at the centre of it all, her, her, her.
Still her.
Always her.
.
He’s not sure what arouses him. He hasn’t slept well in years, perpetual exhaustion clinging to him like a shawl. Some would call it the weight of living, no doubt.
There’s a shift in the air, a disturbance that’s not enough to make Ekko jolt awake and reach for a weapon, but enough to make his eyes flutter open. He breathes the cool air, pushing his grogginess away.
There’s a shape at the foot of his bed. Small and round. It takes several seconds for his vision to adjust, for him to realise that a hooded figure sits perched on his bed, knees pulled to their chest.
Ekko hasn’t had to rely on his battle instincts in two years, but there’s enough left in him to attack without hesitation. His fingers tangle in the cloak, shoving the figure down, his knee pressing harshly into their abdominal, hands seeking the intruder’s throat—
“Wow, little man, you sure know how to roll out the welcoming mat,” the all too familiar voice drawls before his fingers tighten instinctively around the slender, warm throat.
A haggard breath forces from Ekko’s parted mouth. In the wild struggle, the stranger’s hood has slipped down, revealing a familiar face with a startling crop of blue hair. His heart squeezes painfully, forcing him away from Jinx’s apparition.
“Leave me alone,” he croaks, rubbing his eyes till his vision swims. “Just leave me alone! I don’t want to see you anymore!”
“Huh, fine. I thought after two years, the welcome would be a tad warmer. Brrr.”
Ekko pushes himself to his feet, stumbling away, watching warily as the young woman sits back up, picking at her messy hair. She looks different. A little older than Jinx from his visions or memories. Her hair is longer, though nowhere near the same length she once had braided into two twin braids. She swings her leg back and forth, another pulled up to her chest while she watches him. And… her eyes. Ekko was the last person to see her with blue eyes before their battle on the bridge. The last time he saw Jinx alive, they were a dangerous, burning violet.
Now, even with the shade of the night, they’re a muddy mix between the blue he once knew, and the piercing violet that made her so deadly. As if that restless edge in her has calmed down and settled.
Ekko’s chest heaves as he stumbles back a step.
“Soooo—” she begins.
“You’re alive.”
Jinx shrugs her shoulders. “Yup. Clearly. In the flesh even,” she crows, but it’s more muted when compared to the wildness he once faced off against.
His hand flies to his stomach, and Ekko distantly wonders if he’s about to throw up in front of a girl he’s spent his entire life loving.
Mercifully, his stomach settles, but his heart beats so loudly he can hear the blood rushing in his skull.
“You’re alive,” he repeats, harder this time. “It’s been two years.”
“Yeah.”
She doesn’t offer more than that, but there’s a shadow over her narrow face. She’s healthier. There’s more weight on her bones, her skin has lost some of the pallidness. As if someone took Powder and Jinx, split them clean down the middle, and fused them into one body. Stronger, more self-reassured, less teetering on the brink.
“Would have written but mail is crappy where I was,” she jokes, her voice a familiar, drawling litany. “Besides, this is so much more mysterious—”
He closes the distance between them in two steps. His room isn’t big but he would have walked, ran, sprinted if needed to close the distance between them. His arms wrap around her and Ekko squeezes her so tightly he hears a small breath escape Jinx. She’s solid and warm. Smells faintly of sea and something metallic. Ekko buries his face in the soft crook of Jinx’s neck, gasping for breath.
“Woah, hero, you’re gonna break my ribs,” she whispers, but her arms wind around him, more careful, unsure. “I thought you hated me?”
Even when he releases her, Ekko’s hands linger on her, go to her face, examining her through the crack of light illuminating his room.
“I saw you,” he breathes, devastated. “I saw you everywhere. I hoped to see you everywhere.”
Something flickers over her face, an unknown thing, secretive and distant as she’s always felt to him.
“Geez, seeing things? And they call me crazy.”
“You’re not crazy.”
There’s such vehemence in his voice it startles them both. Jinx nibbles on her inner cheek, searching his face cautiously. “I thought you’d be mad.”
Ekko laughs, a low huff of amusement. “Do you think I care for you so little, huh?”
Too late he realises he’s without a shirt, and is, in fact, mostly bare before the girl he’s harboured a crush on for years. Near boyish shyness forces Ekko back, making him clear his throat. His hands tremble when he reaches for a discarded t-shirt, hoping it doesn’t smell bad when he pulls it over his head. When he glances at her over his shoulder, Jinx is still there, still watching him, though there’s a thoughtful air around her.
When she notices him looking, she offers him a sarcastic grin.
“No need to get shy, stud.”
“Shut up,” he grumbles.
He plops down on his unmade bed, watching her watch him. Her face is half hidden by her arms propped on her bent knee, but the silence between them isn’t awkward. They’re taking each other in, taking in the changes that have touched them both in the last two years.
“Why come back now?” he asks, eventually.
Jinx blinks, near feline-like, dropping her head back to stare at his ceiling as if it may offer an answer. “I’m a crappy friend, but not that crappy. Happy birthday, wonder boy.”
There’s a creak in his heart, a lightness in his ribcage, a balloon of affection despite their troubled history that inflates just for her. “You remember my birthday?”
She makes a sound at the back of her throat. Glances at him from the corner of her eye. “Well, we picked it together, silly, so sure I do.” Shadows fall over her features when she angles her head away. “I… I never thought I would come back—that it was better this way.”
“I’m glad you did.”
Something close to a smile ghosts over her face at his response. Ekko can’t rip his gaze away from her. He fears that if he does, he’ll wake up and she’ll be gone again, and he’ll have to relive the agony of losing her again.
“Does Vi—”
“No. No. And it’s better this way.”
“But—”
“Drop it, Ekko. Please.”
He does. Because this is too good to be true, and he doesn’t want this to end. Emotions mix inside him, battling for dominance, so he sits there, letting them all wash over him.
“You’ve been busy,” she says abruptly, nodding her head in the general direction of the outside world. “Their new wonder boy. I’m not surprised. You’ve always been good at creating things. Good things.”
“And you’ve always been good at fixing them,” he says.
Ekko thinks back on the countless times she helped him to fix up old rubbish others have discarded and sell them in Benzo’s shop as small treasures. It feels, now, like a lifetime ago. In a sense, it has been.
She snorts; it’s an ugly, hateful sound. “Not always.”
There’s weight to how she says it. Pain lingers in each syllable, more so a whispered confession. She’s thinking of others, those lost through accidents or her own direct involvement.
“I’m sorry about Isha,” Ekko says carefully, thumb pressing into the hollow of his bare knee. He itches to take her hand, to smooth his thumb over her knuckles instead, but he doesn’t. She’s never been his to touch. “Vi told me about her.”
Jinx shrinks, turning away and he mentally curses. A sore spot even years later. Understandably so.
“I… shit. Sorry.”
“What’s with the long face?” she exclaims suddenly, jumping to her feet and twirling. Her hands drop to her hips and she grins at him, all mischief. “C’mon, we gotta get out of here.”
Ekko squints. “Uh, what?”
“It’s your birthday, silly,” she says, like it should be obvious. “We’re going to spend the day together.”
.
Jinx keeps her hood up, her gait steady. Any sign of blue tucked away. She’s changed her attire to draw less attention, and as they walk in the hazy dawn light towards the bridge separating the sister cities, it feels almost normal. Casual. Not at all like the last time they spoke, they were about to fight side by side in a battle for their lives. Not at all like he spent two years thinking she’s dead. That still stings, but knowing how she felt back then, the state she was in before he talked her down from the edge, the pain she’s been through, Ekko can’t bring himself to feel resentful. He only wants to hold her and tell her it’ll be okay because she’s not alone.
“You’re not saying, are you?” he asks, hands in his pockets.
“Nope,” she replies, popping the p. “Can’t.”
Words rush to his tongue. Insistence that she can and should stay—that there’s space here for her, not just in his life, but in the new Zaun he’s helping to shape. He almost admits it to her then. That he’s built this for her and the ones they lost along the way.
Ekko continues walking, staring at the ground, noticing too late she’s fallen behind. He peers over his shoulder and freezes when he notices what’s caught her attention. The mural. Welcoming anyone coming into Zaun. Her face, slightly younger but now immortalised, peers back at them.
“You drew this.”
He loosens a breath. “Yeah, I did. I, uh, just…”
Jinx reaches for her own face, fingertips ghosting over the painted wall. There’s tension on her face when she turns to look at him, something piercing and hard and thoughtful. Same pinch to her eyebrows he saw earlier in his bedroom.
“I won’t let them take you,” he says softly. “If they came for you. I would fight for you.”
She doesn’t break their eye contact. “I know. You shouldn’t, but I know you would.”
“Then stay.”
She saunters forward, stopping only when they’re almost chest to chest. “I’m not her, y’know? The other me. The one you love.”
He smiles, huffing a small breath, refocusing on her and her small pout. Ekko reaches forward, tucking a few stray strands back under Jinx’s hood, lingering for a beat. “I wasn’t her Ekko, either. That’s why I came back. I like this version of you just fine. But just so we’re clear, every version of you is a pain in my ass.” He tugs on a small braid, grinning when she shoots him an annoyed glare and slaps his hand away. “But I won’t have it any other way. Wait, no. It sure as hell would be simpler if you didn’t try to kill me anymore, but I guess I’ll deal with that, too.”
Jinx snorts, absently reaching for the spot he touched, her gaze softer than before. “Ha! You hit like a girl, by the way. I never got to tell you.”
“You tried to blow us up.”
“Eh,” she whines. “That was one time. You gotta let that go.”
Ekko exhales a small laugh and realises he hasn’t smiled or laughed this much in years. Joy was leeched from him with her absence, and while he did his duties, there was no security of Jinx’s usual push and pull to keep him balanced and focused. Even when they were enemies, hunted each other down and attacked each other, they existed on opposite sides of a perfectly balanced sphere.
Her nearness, the relief of having her there, overshadows the darker recollection of that afternoon when she tried to blow them up more than once. Memories so painful Ekko wishes to scrub them from his mind forever, yet they remain seared into his psyche.
She grabs his elbow, dragging him forward, breaking the surrounding gloom. “Come on then,. Things to do, things to see.”
And Ekko does what he’s done since they were young. He follows her. Because they might not have tomorrow.
.
The day goes by too fast. Almost a blur. A series of snapshots Ekko will lock away in his mind forever. He never expected he’d get to do this again. This is something his younger self could have only dreamt about once. When they dreamt of simpler things; flashy toys and delicious sweets, things only a young boy could fantasise about, aside from a loving home, because at least that much he had.
They walked and talked and joked around, eating street vendor food all day. Ekko knows they’re pushing their luck, but he can’t help himself. Jinx grew up here. This is her home too, and he wants to show her the progress they’ve made. There’s something comfortable about her snarky commentary and ill-timed jibes at the Council members. She asks about Vi only once, in relation to Cait, and Ekko tells her the truth.
They’re happy. They’re together. She nods, satisfied, and moves on.
“We should go see Jericho next.” It’s an offhand suggestion while they walk the newly paved river path. Now people from the Undercity can enjoy the same luxury of having a peaceful sidewalk to take their kids down. It’s amazing how it’s the small things that bring people happiness.
“Can’t,” Jinx replies, glancing towards the setting sun. Her smile twists; it’s still a smile, but it’s sad, in a way. “Sorry, hero.”
He takes several seconds to speak. “So, you’re leaving anyway.”
“Yes. I told you I can’t stay.”
“It’s a pity, then.”
She tilts her head. “Why?”
Damn her for even asking. Damn her and all the shitty circumstances for keeping them apart. Damn her for picking him during that game of hide and seek years ago. Damn her for being there for him and not being there at the same time. Damn her for being his entire world for years. Even when Ekko thought he hated her, he wasn’t free of her. He never could be. His girl with blue hair.
He’s in love with her, in every possible way, but they both know they can’t work like this. There’s too many ghosts for Jinx here, and despite the changes, Ekko can’t promise her she won’t get dragged off to Stillwater the moment authorities find out she’s alive after all.
Ekko frowns, clenches his fists, and walks away.
But she’s like an anchor to him. He stops several paces away, tied to her. “You’re gonna break my heart.”
They’ve been everything from friends to enemies and strangers to reluctant allies again. So much of his life has revolved around her. Continues to revolve around her. Past and present. But if Jinx sends him away now, if she walks away, Ekko will let her go. Because he can finally rest easy, knowing she is alive and well, even if they’re apart.
“In any other universe, I might have loved you,” she breathes.
He pivots towards her, his nostrils flaring. “Love me in this one,” he insists, reaching for her. Ekko cups her cheeks, tilting her head until her hood slips back down, exposing her blue hair to the setting sun. He’s glad there’s no one in sight because he can’t think straight right now. “Choose me now. Ask me to go away with you. Ask me.”
He presses his forehead to hers. Jinx’s empty gaze appears glazed over, her thoughts far away no matter how hard he tries to grip her and hold her close.
“I don’t deserve you, boy saviour,” she whispers emptily. “You’re good.”
“No one decides for me, Jinx. Not even you.”
She blinks owlishly, searching his wild stare, a pained expression on her face, her fingers knotting against her chest. “What if you don’t want me after a while? I’m… different and if I get bad again... What if—”
“Ask me, damnit.”
Jinx loosens a shaky breath, jumping through a hundred micro-expressions in a few seconds. A painful mix between hope and dread.
“C…” Her eyes squeeze shut. “Come with me.”
Ekko sags in relief. “Yes.” He holds her, wraps his arms around her despite the unsure way she folds against him. As if she’s unsure where to put her hands. If she should. “Yes, I’ll come with you. I don’t care if you’re different. I want you as you are, okay? No matter where we are.”
A tremulous breath wheezes past Jinx’s lips. But with that, she melts into him, burying her face against him. Her embrace grows desperate and tight, a tremble shuddering through her body.
“Always a dance with you, huh?” he says after a moment.
She chuckles, the sound warming his collarbone. “And you still got two left feet, boy wonder.”
Constants and variables, young Ekko, Benzo told him once. Everything bad that can happen in this universe might come to pass, but so might everything good.
----
an: ahh I know this isn't really my usual offering but I really hope you guys enjoyed, it's been a while since i've cared enough about canon/canon ship to do this.
#arcane#ekko x jinx#timebomb#ekkojinx#arcane fic#asks#thank you for asking anon!! just a tiny 'sort of fix-it'
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through the valley, part i
ellie williams x reader
through the valley masterlist
summary: what if Joel didn’t lie? what if there was more people immune? more people like ellie? more people like you?
word count: 7.4k
warnings: this fic doesn’t follow the original plot from tlou part II. canon typical violence.
The weather was nice in Seattle. If it wasn’t for the feeling of revenge that ran through her veins, Ellie might have even liked the visit. But it was hard perceiving anything that weren’t clues to find them.
Even after weeks, all Ellie could see when she closed her eyes was Joel lifeless body dumped on the floor of a basement. She remembered everything. Remembered every face that was there when it happened. Remembered the face of the one who did it. How she didn’t seem satisfied afterwards, but either did she seem to have any regrets. Ellie couldn’t wait to crash her skull.
What she didn't expect was ran into a weird cult from nearby Seattle to make things more complicated for her. She tried to not get too close to this seemingly fight between the wolves and these scars. She didn't care of their conflicts and fights. Ellie only desired and craved to finish this hurt inside her chest, killing Abby and returning home, back to Tommy and Maria. Back to Jesse and Dina. Back to Joel.
When she woke up the third day of being in Seattle, everything changed. She followed the marks on her map, ending near the Old Town, where she thought one of the men from the WLF was hiding. Although, when she tried to get inside, she found out it that it had to be something bigger than that. The building was deeply secured, guards were present at every door, and before she could turn away, something triggered inside her chest. Did Owen ask for a backup? Was the other woman there with him? Was Abby there with him? She had to make sure of it. Of whom was hiding inside those walls. So she grabbed her bow, and chose to discover it by herself.
You have always loved the moon. How calm everything was at night. All the sleepless hours you spent listening the wind blow and watching how bright the moon was, somehow helped you to mourn your mother's death.
You missed your mother. You missed her singing, her calloused fingers caressing your hair. But she was gone. Those fuckers murdered her. And she wasn't coming back. It's not like you could do much, either. Being the leader's daughter only made you be kept away, not letting you out of the island on any circumstances. Your mother didn't like you to go out alone, anyway. She always said, the lord gave you a gift, and you shall accept it as it is.
Being always kept away and guarded had some benefits as well. Through the years, you developed some strategies to gain some time alone. Like passing through the guards and ending up in the roof, watching the stars at night. You were pretty good at being sneaky.
So that night, as always, you climbed up to the roof, and hanged around for a couple of hours. The wind danced around you. You saw some people from the community guarding around the zone, the same people as always. You looked at the north gate, August laughing at something Constance probably said. Around the high walls that guarded the Haven Max, Moira and Peter watched for any possible threat. Zachary and Karen were changing positions with Duncan and Celia at the south gate. The east gate was guarded by Ricky and Emmett, who were calmly chatting. When your gaze laid on the west gate, you gasped, brows knitting together with worry. Henry was on the ground. Where was Eva? You needed to alert the others. Someone entered inside the gates.
Ellie didn't expect the break into the settlement to be so hard. She got inside the gate, but injured. And people were coming from everywhere. When she was hiding from two men, she heard them scream for backup at the top floor. Was there where Abby was? They had to be hiding something. Something bigger than she thought.
After fighting with god knows how many of those soldiers, she noticed how they were quite different from the ones she fought before. Those didn't have jackets from the Washington Liberation Front, but all of them shared certain characteristics, same clothes, same hairstyle... But what creeped Ellie the hell out was the scars they all had marked on their faces. She then slowly started to realize how wrong she had been to enter those gates. This had nothing to do with Abby. This was way worse. With all the strength left in her body, Ellie tried to run away from the soldiers that were coming for her.
Despite the bleeding in her abdomen, she succeeded to kill all of them. The night sounded quiet again, only the noise of the rain could be heard. She took advantage to rest for a while, trying to stop the blood with some cloth and alcohol. When the sun came up again, Ellie was ready to leave that fucked up place before more soldiers came. She grabbed her backpack and her bow, and started her way back to Abby. However, a loud grunt left her mouth when a bat hit her head. After all, you were pretty good at being sneaky.
The next time Ellie opened her eyes, her two arms were chained up to a wall. She was inside a cell. There were no windows, so she couldn't think how much time may have passed. She doesn't even remember how she ended up there. Her head was still hurting, and the lack of water and food made her only weaker.
It wasn't until hours later that a figure appeared in front of her. A young girl, marked with the same scars, wearing the same clothes as all of those soldiers that now were dead because of her. The girl knelt in front of her, eyes empty, and no emotion seemed to came to the surface. Ellie only looked at her, no words coming from her throat. The girl, as a response, spitted on the redhead's cheek. Still, neither of them said a word. Ellie didn't seem mad either. She felt misplaced, confused and dazed, sure. But she didn't felt angry. That only appeared to make the other girl more irritated.
You didn't know what to do. All of your friends were dead in front of you, Max, Ricky, Moira, August... All of them. When you find the guilty person who did it, you didn't believe it at first. A girl around your age, alone? Only with a bow and a gun, she had taken away the lives of countless trained soldiers?
You were alone at the building now. Only her asleep body retained inside the other room, making you some kind of company. You were sure more people from the community were coming, but you weren't sure when. You searched the whole building looking for more people that may have come with her, but she seemed to come to the island alone, and didn't seem like a threat. No WLF signs anywhere. Just a map of Seattle, some stupid trading cards, a comic and two more guns was all this girl had inside her backpack. No food nor water. If this girl did come alone - which you sincerely doubted - she had to be here for you. She knew who you were, what you were.
But when she woke up and looked up to you, she seemed unconcerned, almost indifferent. If she didn't know who you were, why was she here? Her calm gaze only made you angrier. You spitted on her face, and she still didn't seem to mind the situation she was in. You didn't want to speak to her, she didn't deserve to live, anyway. She murdered all the corpses that still rested around the area. Still, you needed answers. You needed to know why she'd done it. Why was she here. Who she was. So you asked, only to be answered with silence.
"Fine by me" You murmured, standing up and closing the cell once again, and leaving her in the dark. Patience wasn't one of your virtues. Defiance was. And if this girl wanted to challenge you, she was welcome to do it.
so excited for this fic!! please comment your thoughts!!
#tlou fanfic#ellie williams#ellie williams x female reader#tlou ellie#ellie tlou#the last of us part 2#tlou part 2#tlou2#ellie williams fluff#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams smut#ellie x reader#ellie the last of us#ellie x fem reader#the last of us 2#tlou fic#tlou#tlou fanfiction#the last of us#tlou game
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like a waltz⎯ part 1: brisé.
pairing(s): ateez ot8 x fem!reader; this chapter is seonghwa x reader focused & wooyoung x reader focused! series summary: when 8 mysterious bachelors arrive to town and fall for your charms, will you be able to reach your goal to be prima ballerina or be dragged into a selfish waltz between love and obsession? glimpse: the worst night of your life makes you recall what you thought was one of the best nights of you life - meeting jung wooyoung at the cromer opera house. warnings/tags: inspired by Ateez’s Ice on my Teeth MV & Teasers, Mafia AU, Ballet AU, early 1900’s AU with some divergences in tech advancements (i.e if i think itd be cool to include, this world has it earlier than irl), 3rd person POV, use of YN, mxm, polyteez, mature topics, strong language, ballet lore, angst, fluff, flirting, suggestive topics, violence, traumatic foot injury, unequal power dynamics, allusions to exploitation in ballet, pain, fear, injuries, alcohol mention, reader discretion advised. word count: 5.7k -> next chapter series masterlist
brisé ; french pronunciation: [bʁize]; literally 'broken'
All she had wanted her entire life was to be the ballerina prima. It was all she worked for. Every day she woke up to dance; she lived, breathed, ate for ballet. And she almost had it. It had been so close. The shining lights, the praise, the private dressing room, all for her. An escape from the shame of the petit rats, the groping from patrons, the reliance on a man’s wealth. She was going to be a star – in her own right. She was going to be a star.
Now, she laid in the dirty alley way, beaten and broken.
Through the torn bits of her hosiery, she could see her ankles were a purple-red color, splotched, like a gruesome Impressionist painting. The bones were at odd angles, too sharp, too extended for them to be not broken. Her hands shook as she tried to move them, tried to push at the pain that crept up her legs in a deafening manner. She could barely move them, roll them, anything without crying out in pain.
And cry she did. Wails escaped her chest in a mournful song. Her coal-mascara dripped down her rouged cheeks, melting into a mess and staining her mink fur coat. Their fur coat – their gift to her - that now felt suffocating around her, strands of the fur stuck to her sweatied skin and making her skin crawl with the feeling of maggots. She struggled to take it off, fighting with it as if it the animal had come back to life and was biting at her. Shoving it off and onto the alley floor with a huff, she moved to wipe her eyes with the backs of her hands. They too were injured. Her dainty fingers were scraped and cut up from the harsh cobblestone beneath her. Phalanges dripped ruby red, and most likely had been smudged over her face with a false rouge. If someone had caught a look, they’d be afraid her face was bleeding. Luckily, that had been spared; everything had been except for her feet. Just her legs were mangled, beaten, bludgeoned with bats, and crushed into the ground ‘til the bone creaked and shattered. Her poor dancing feet.
She hadn’t thought they would do it; she thought…
Jongho had cried for her the night before, pleaded with her as she told him her decision.
She should’ve known then.
Wooyoung advised against it after dinner, hissing out in fear that Hongjoong wouldn’t be happy.
She should’ve known then.
Yunho refused to see her that evening, locked away in his study.
She should’ve known then.
Seonghwa had even grabbed her hand this morning before she left the mansion; he had said nothing but his eyes were dark and cautioning as he pressed a kiss to her knuckles.
She should’ve taken his warning.
Speak of the devil, and he shall appear. His footsteps were heavy as he approached her. The familiar scent of his cologne that was once reassuring, exciting even, now made her face scrunch up into despair. She tried to shift away from him, wriggling away like a worm. Each bend of her ankles made agony crawl up her spine. Her throat flexed in pain and a whine escaped her chest unwillingly.
She couldn’t go far and Seonghwa easily pinned her down with simply a cold look in his eyes.
His eyes were always serious, a shadowy thing that only lightened around his lovers. But they did not lighten with her tonight. In fact, she swore they were the coldest she had seen them like a cold star staring back at her.
Seonghwa stopped in front of her with his feet straddled her legs; his perfect new shoes smelled of polish, expensive and shining. With a tilt of his head, he stared down at her with his handsome face shadowed by a large brimmed hat. She stared up at him, her mouth a scowl-like grimace.
His cool gaze carefully left her tear-sodden face to graze over her ankles. Blood coated her nylon tights, her knees rubied and torn. Her ankles looked worse for wear, twisted, mangled, and beaten. He could see the bone pressing into her bruised flesh, painting it ivory white.
“My dove,” he hummed out in a coo. He knelt. “My pretty dancer. Poor thing.”
Poor thing, he tutted. Poor thing, they all tutted. The same pathetic words from the matching mouths of rich folk who wanted to play with her like she was nothing but a ballerina doll spinning on a music box. Watching her spin around and around like a chicken with no head, whirling, out of breath for their amusement. All she had been was a marionette for them to play with. That’s what she realized she was even to him, even to them.
She stared up at him with a glower. She thought they were different.
“You did this.” She growled.
Her tone was low and vicious unlike anything he had heard from her before.
Seonghwa simply smiled. His carved lips twitched up on one side of his beautiful face, forming a wicked half-smile. His diamond-inlayed teeth glinted in the gas-lamp light that dripped into the alley way from the main road. A leather-gloved hand reached out to grasp her jaw, not unkindly but certainly with a firmness familiar for him. He directed her gaze his way, taking in the dripping stage-makeup. Surely it would leave oily remnants on his fingertips. Surely his touch would leave watercolored bruises on her jaw. He tutted again at her swollen waterlogged features. A smear of blood cut across the bridge of her nose. With the utmost care, firm and slow, he brushed away the grime. Blood seeped into his leathered gloved. Her blood.
“This is why Wooyoungie likes you so much,” he chuckled lowly. “You’re both brats at heart.”
Her mouth sneered in annoyance, mimicking a sneer she had seen him flash far too often. He thought this was nothing. That she was being disobedient for fun. Like this was just a horrible, horrible game. Despair filled her eyes as she tried to shift her jaw out of his hand with that, baring her teeth like a mongrel would. He caught her chin between harsh, gloved fingers again.
“But, like Wooyoung, I love you nonetheless,” he confessed. “Would do anything for you.”
His eyes were dark, inky, like tar swallowing her whole. But they were serious. Deadly so. Just like Hongjoong was when he had promised she’d regret her decision if she followed through with it.
Still, it ached like a lie. It ached bone-deep like her injuries. (She had seen the attackers’ tattoos on their skin. The word ‘A T E E Z’ inked onto their knuckles; ‘BLACK PIRATES’ on some of their bared arms. Their suits they wore were of the men at the mansion. The ski masks covering their features from view didn’t make them ghostly attackers like they had wished. She had seen the masked men before creeping out of the mansion’s office at the order of Yunho or Mingi.)
She wasn’t dumb.
His thumb caressed her cheek fondly. Expensive, freshly cleaned leather smooth and soft against her make-up muddied features.
“Let’s go home, hm?” he hummed. “You look like you need a warm bath and plenty of rest. We’ll have a doctor come assess your injuries, dove.”
And in a mimicry of a gentleman, he shrugged off his long coat to wrap around her – rather than grab her now-dirtied fur coat from the cobblestone floor. In fact, she bet he’d find it so filthy he’d leave it for the rats. Maybe another petit rat of the ballet would open the doors of the backstage only feet away and steal it away. With words of ‘oh, a patron gave it to me’ after she scrubbed and scrubbed the blood, the makeup, the grim away. Just as he’d do with her, wash it all away until she was shiny and new again.
With ease, he lifted her up into his arms, cradling her close as he rose to full height once more. There was no discussion. No mention of her apartment on the far side of town, her home; no, they would be heading to the strange mansion the Kim clan called home. His grip was firm on her as he exited the alley way of the Cromer Opera House.
It was on this day YN wished she had never met the charming second-youngest of the Kim clan that day in the foyer de la danse. Then, her life and livelihood wouldn’t have been stolen by the ones who had once admired her.
-
The foyer de la danse was known as simply the ballet boudoir to the ballerinas. While it was a sort of dressing room, sort of practice room all-in-one, it was also dreadfully unprivate. The intricately decorated room of gold and glamour was the perfect frame for a pretty picture. Tall mirrors enclosed the room on all sides as new gas-powered chandeliers high above lit the room in a bright golden glow, highlighting each of the girls in view. There were no dark corners, no privacy screens, just mirrors, gold, light, and pretty girls.
None of the male dancers were allowed here. None of the female patrons either. But men who had high-status or who scraped up enough money to spend to stare at the young girls prepare for the show would promenade around. Freshly pressed fine linen suits, luxurious watches on their wrists or in their breast pocket, expensive cologne mingling with the aroma of their expensive liquor. Greedy eyes scanning up and down the ballerina’s half-naked forms as if they were just meat at a butchery.
They’d sip their bourbon leisurely, and approach the girls no matter what they were doing. If they were warming up at the barre, lacing up their shoes’ ribbons with patience, pressing fine powder over their face, or even mid-adjusting their costume with a costumier, they’d drop everything to smile coquettish and bite back the annoyance of disruption. In the ballet boudoir, the men were king, and the ballerinas were nothing but jesters for their amusement. The boudoir - it was a cruel nickname to taunt the young dancers who didn’t know any better. This was no private place. No, it wasn’t a dressing room like they’ve heard of.
If it was a less-than-full audience at the Cromer Opera House, there would be only familiar men in the room – who oftentimes already had their eyes on their prey. Lord Frederickson favored Julia with the red hair. Mr. Takahashi was leering after Mina. Kim Dohyun had been pursuing Imara for a year now; she had saved almost enough money to be out of the boudoir and have her own personal dressing room, maybe by next season! They were unfortunately lucky.
Now, YN had been the fortunate unlucky girl. Throughout her time at the Cromer Opera House, she had only a few male admirers. All who had little money and would spend most of their wealth getting into the boudoir and have none left to ‘woo’ with gift-giving or patronage. Even so, she had to act friendly. Smile with your cheeks, YN, an older ballerina had advised once. They can tell when there is nothing behind your eyes.
YN had been part of the corps de ballet for over a year now because of this. A petit rat at her age was mocked. She had no debut, no prospects. It wasn’t from not trying. She had practiced since she was three after all. She was an urchin with a seamstress mother and forgotten father who had passed in the war. It was typical of girls like her to try to seek fame - the easy-way - her mother claims. But there was no easy way in ballet.
Decades of training resulted in swollen purple toes, aching muscles, millions of destroyed ballet shoes, and countless inquiries to the choreographer to let her have a chance. The choreographer who had something against her. Maybe it was from when she was a child and would rather play than practice on the barre or maybe it was when she was a teen and had begun to read at breaks rather than continue to strain her muscles like some of the girls. The Madame hated her.
Regardless, she had never danced on stage alone, never was stand out. Her golden hour had yet to come. And with that, she wasn’t pursued by patronage suitors seriously. A blessing and a curse. She avoided wandering hands, wet mouths, and nasty tongues. But every costume had to be commissioned with her own coin (most often, she would sew it in the dark of night, icing her feet as she snipped at scrap fabric her mother owned.) Each ballet shoe’s cost was taken from her meager wages. The fee of practices, the fee of using the opera house’s rehearsal room, the fee of utilizing the boudoir’s accommodations like powder and rouge and candlelight if they could charge for that, all laid on her shoulders.
A true petit rat, lowly and searching for scraps. Digging her nails into opportunities where she can shine. But not from another’s assistance. No, her pride was too heavy on her back now for that.
“YN, YN, YN!”
There was a chatter – giggling and chittering between the younger girls – as they came padding into the boudoir before show-time. Tip tap, tip tap, tip. Around the corner of the opened grand doors, they came waddling in like a flock. Their swan costumes made them truly look like little ducklings; white feathered tutus leaving stray feathers onto the wooden floors as they scurried her way.
The one yelling her name was young, not even ten years old yet. She was short for her age too, a thing she despised. Only tall girls were prima ballerina her fellow ballerina friends taunted. She slid to her knees beside YN.
She smiled up from her spot on the ground, one pointe shoe on and the other resting beside her.
“Tiny, hello,” she greeted, finishing tying the ballet shoes’ laces up her legs.
“Have you heard? Have you heard?” Another of the young ballerinas chimed as she rushed forward as well, her dark hair tumbling from her half-up bun.
“Jane, your hair,” YN half-scolded, half-warned.
Her eyes glanced away from the youngers towards the grand gold-gilded doors of the boudoir, half-expecting their Madame to walk in and lash at them for looking so untidy. Despite this being a dressing room.
Pausing in tying up her laces, she gestured for the girl to join her on the cold wooden floor (they didn’t utilize the radiator heaters until mid-act 1, so it’d be warm for the patrons during intermission.)
Jane was thirteen and, with a huff, she plopped down, bony knees clanking as she did so. Her costume splayed out in a feathered mess. Her little fingers began to pick and fluff the costume. Her head lolled back, and YN began to untangle the pins from her curls.
“YN,” the one she called Tiny whined.
“Okay, okay,” she chuckled. “What’s so exciting?”
“There are new young bachelors in town!”
“What?”
Cromer wasn’t a tiny coastal town anymore. It was bustling with people and money and trade. New buildings were popping up more and more, growing taller and taller by the day. The high society they were aware of was growing larger and larger until the folk they thought were rich and powerful weren’t all that rich and powerful anymore compared to the new conglomerates. But unfortunately, these millionaires were often married, unhappily.
“You know the Ateez House?”
YN laughed at that.
Everyone in town did. It was their most favorite ghost house. It was the largest sprawling estates in Cromer with the spooky story that all knew. The story went it was once owned by a pirate captain, the only Captain of the Black Pirates. They pilfered and ravaged ports one by one until they were known across the seas as a brutal blood-thirsty crew. No coastal town was safe from them. Until one day, they stopped sailing mysteriously. The story goes that the captain settled in the town of Cromer under a false name and built Ateez Mansion – a sprawling estate built with blood-soaked gold and diamonds. Some say its haunted with the deaths of the captain’s victims; others say the entire house was cursed from the stolen treasure hidden within.
All just tall tales to try to explain why a beautiful mansion remained unhoused yet perfectly taken care of. Sometimes you could see candlelight flickering in the foyer through the grand stained-glass windows or even ghostly figures with no faces walking about.
“Yes,” she replied. “I’m the one who told you the ghost story about Ateez House.”
One of the youngest curled closer to her side, shivering a bit as she thought of the scary story.
“They moved into the Ateez House!” Tiny exclaimed, slamming her hands down on the wooden floor in excitement. Tiny loved to gossip and this was like Christmas. New bachelors meant new flings which meant new gossip!
“Was there a sale of the estate?” YN wondered as she finally got all the pins from Jane’s hair out and in a small pile on the floor beside her.
“No,” one of the other young teens said. She wasn’t even among the clambering youths around her; she was on the nearby barre stretching out. “No sale had been published in the papers. I heard from June who heard from Martha who heard from Wendy who heard from Lorelai who heard from her current suitor that the bachelors already owned the house but never stayed there.”
Now, that was news. YN’s brows rose in surprise.
“It’s been their house?” she repeated as she paused in gathering Jane’s hair into a bun. Another ballerina warming up nearby nodded enthusiastically.
“Do any of you tattletales know their names? How many are there?” YN asked.
Across the sea of swan-costumed girls, sparkling in gems and beads, their faces fell.
“That’s a no then… has anyone seen these mysterious bachelors leaving the mansion?”
There was a silence.
“Any proof of these men at all?”
Nothing.
YN sighed out. “Who would own that mansion and never live there? It’s been empty for decades now. None of us have known the owners. I don’t—I think it’s just gossip, girls.”
Jane wiggled in her grasp, bratty as she whined. “But YN,” she complained. She had been so excited to imagine and pretend and think of handsome suitors.
“I’ll believe it when I see it, hm,” YN encouraged as she finished wrapping the girl’s hair tight into a perfect bun. Pin after pin was slid in with precision. “For now, no more gossiping about ghostly bachelors in an abandoned mansion. Practice calls – Tiny, have you warmed up?”
Tiny furrowed her brow, her lips falling into a pout. Embarrassment heated her face as she curtly shook her head ‘no’.
“Go on,” YN encouraged the other with a smile before patting Jane’s shoulders to indicate she was done with her now-pristine hairdo as well.
“She acts like she’s the Madame,” Tiny mumbled under her breath as she stomped to her feet. “She’s not even a featured ballerina.”
The snide remark stung but YN tried to remember that they were young. Young and unaware of the hardships that awaited them. It wasn’t just dancing here. It was far more than that. YN returned to her shoes, tying them once more.
New bachelors in town. . . that’d be something. Far too often was it old men with oily money. But there is no way anyone truly owned that estate for all these years and no one in town knew it. No way. Somebody would know who owned it. It wouldn’t have become a ghost story. It was just silly gossip. Wishful thinking for a man to come sweep you off your feet.
She sighed and stretched her limbs before hoisting herself up to prepare for tonight’s show.
-
Swan Lake: a princess turned into a swan by an evil sorcerer's curse. She’d watch the prima ballerina, Odette, dance about gracefully from the wings each night. YN’s toes flexing at every movement, as if she were dancing it herself. She yearned for it. Ached to be the one performing. Instead, she was simply one in the crowd. The corps de ballet, the ensemble. She’d spin about in the back, pirouette perfect, leap lovely. Awe and comfort the lead throughout her struggle as a swan as she, YN, remained the ugly duckling.
Her gaze would dance throughout the crowd as she did an arabesque, slow and precise. There is Nikolai in his usual spot. There’s Mrs Lee and her young sons. Ariel and her suitor Sunghoon. Takahashi in Box 2 with his sisters. Box 4 had Fredrikson and his family. Box 5 was empty – wonder where Dohyun was, Imara would be relieved she could relax tonight she bet. Her eyes skipped over Box 8 because, of course, it would be empty. It was always empty. Except…
There was a quick plie of her knees before she had to jete away off-stage
Whispers consumed the backstage. Did you see? Did you see?
Box 8 was occupied.
Never had it been occupied in all the years of the Cromer Opera House.
Cromer held many superstitions even as a modern industrializing town. They had ghost stories about houses after all. But one of the strangest superstitions was the number 8. They skipped the 8th street; the eighth floor was unspoken in the tallest of buildings. No aisle 8, no 8th editions.
Box 8 of the Opera House was left empty strategically - for luck.
But now, there sat only one man. Shadowed by the dark curtains of the box, he watched the show from opera glasses and sipped on glittering champagne that would occasionally catch the candlelight of the grand chandeliers.
Did you see his face? Who is he? Is he handsome? Who could buy the box? Who would want to buy that box?
“Quiet!” One of the older ballerinas snapped at the youngers. “The audience will hear you!”
YN snorted behind a hand, standing ready in the wings. While she didn’t gossip, she listened. As if the audience was completely enraptured by their rendition of Swan Lake. The Opera, the Ballet, the Theatre: they weren’t to solely watch a show and be entertained. It was social. It was always social. Of course, the audience was wondering the same questions as they were.
Who was he? Was it a he? His form looked masculine.
She wanted to catch a glimpse.
-
It was a man she surmised after the next scene. YN was downstage this dance, sat among the young ballerinas and acting as a mother swan to them as they would do dramatic port de bras, arm movements. She had time to glance about once more.
In the shadows of Box Number 8 was a handsome man. Dark hair framed his face. He wore a suit that was a deep black velvet. And his eyes were glued to her, she swore it.
He was someone new. He was someone intriguing. And she waited to see if he was indeed watching her. Her group stood after sometime to chase after Odette, leaping this way and that until joining back in the right-upper corner of the stage on a lifted platform, stylized as a grassy hill.
She looked up at the box. He was staring at her. He was staring at her, opera glasses focused on her. They glinted in the candle-light. He disregarded the spotlit prima ballerina pirouetting around the lower left of the stage. For her. She smiled at him.
Tiny glanced her way with a giddy immatureness in her actions, breaking the elegance of a ballerina in her excitement. She could already hear Madame’s scolding at tonight’s debrief. But YN didn’t mind. Because he was looking at her.
And everyone knew it.
-
Act One finished in a roar of applause. Heavied red curtains slid shut for intermission as they hurried off stage.
“He was looking at her.” Jane exclaimed bouncing on her feet as she tugged her friend’s arm in excitement.
The corps de ballet was walking all together through the backstage halls of the Opera House towards the boudoir. The prima ballerina and the principal dancers escaped to their own private dressing rooms – YN watched as a patron, Mr. Kim, an older gentleman snuck into the prima ballerina’s room.
“No, he wasn’t,” another girl claimed.
“Yes, he was,” Jane defended.
“No, he wasn’t,” another snorted.
“Yes, he was!” Tiny yelled, indignantly.
“Tabitha!” the Madame rounded the corner of the boudoir, exiting out of its doors to meet the ensemble.
The Madame was a strict looking woman, tall nosed with her hair in a meticulous updo. Her cane did little to aid in her walking but much in discipline. Too many times had she felt the thwack of the cane against the back of her legs, her arched back, or her stomach.
Legs straight! Back straight! Don’t slouch! YN!
The group paused at her appearance; some of the girls bowed their head in respect; others hid behind taller legs.
“Miss Tabitha, must I remind you of your manners every day?” she queried, her tone loud and grating. “As a lady of this company, you must be a lady.”
“Sorry, Madame,” Tiny immediately apologized, head bending forward.
There was a heavy pause as the Madame’s fiery gaze lingered on the young girl before passing over the selection of the ensemble. She glared at YN pointedly. YN had long stopped trying to appeal to her; it never worked she had learned.
“Carry on, girls,” the Madame instructed.
They curtsied in unison before continuing towards the boudoir, hopefully with enough time to slip into their next costumes, if need be, before any patrons were lounging about. It was always uncomfortable to change with the men about – it made them feel truly like objects on display rather than dancers. Skilled ladies.
YN went to her shared vanity, glancing over her makeup. Dabbing at sweat that beaded at her hairline, she went to reach for a handkerchief but when she leant back up right was spooked by the sight of a man behind her.
Black velvet linen made up his suit; she had been right. It was perfectly tailored to his form, luxurious and hugging. His suit jacket was longer than typical but stylish with ornate, Greco-Roman inspired embroidered sleeves.
In the mirror, he was handsome. Strong jawline. Bare collarbones visible from his loose fitted button up beneath his suit jacket. With dark intriguing eyes that didn’t stray from her, a quirked brow, and delicate face-framing strands of hair, he stole her breath away.
“Hello.” He greeted coyly.
The boudoir’s chatter died down at his greeting. All eyes zeroed in on them. She stood to her full height once more, holding the handkerchief in between her hands. Sweat slid down her temple to her jawline delicately.
“Hello,” she greeted, patting down the sides of her face quickly before turning to face him fully.
His lips were plump, curling in a hint of a smile as he watched her spin to face him. He seemed to be examining her just as she did to him.
“You’re far more beautiful than any of these girls,” the mystery man commented leaning over the vanity to peer at her.
His fingers fiddled on the white vanity, making shapes this way and that. Knocking his knuckles against the wood, almost boyishly shy. But this patron wasn’t shy. She had seen men parade about and try every trick in the book with a girl. She could see it in the sparkle of his dark eyes. The curl of his charming smile.
He wasn’t shy. He was smart.
“You are a charmer, sir,” she complimented, opening a glass container holding puff powder.
She flashed him a cheeky smile before using the puff to powder over the sweat on her forehead, her cheeks. A jar of rouge was placed down near the mirror by another dancer. When she turned away, her tutu brushed against the mysterious patron’s waist. He didn’t take his eyes from YN all the while.
“I wish I was,” he softly crooned. So he wouldn’t have to watch her in the mirror, he turned to lean back on the ledge, fingers pressed behind him as he watched her touch up her lipstick with a delicate brush. “I’m only speaking the truth.”
It was a soft admittance. His eyes hadn’t left her features, darting from her eyes to the red petals of her mouth that pressed together in a pout as she finished apply the lipstick. Her finger went to dip into the pot before, with a quick movement, he grasped her wrist.
It wasn’t painful just surprising as she jumped in his grip. His hold loosened greatly, allowing her to pull away if she wished. She didn’t.
“Let me; don’t want you to dirty your hands,” he said.
She licked her lips; the heavy taste of beeswax and rosewater stuck to the back of her tongue as she nodded minutely.
The handsome patron’s cheshire cat grin grew. A dark mole on his cheek caught her attention the more his cheeks puffed up with his smile. Beautiful. He let go of her wrist. Long, long fingers dipped into the red makeup.
“What’s your name?” she asked, a first when it came to the patrons and male-visitors of the ballet boudoir.
Far too often, everyone knew everyone. They’d scratch and crawl away or towards certain men; attention meant everything to a beginning ballet dancer. It meant success. No one seemingly knew him, judging by the looks she caught the more experienced, older ballerinas throw her way.
“Wooyoung. Jung Wooyoung,” he answered her before tapped the blush delicately on one cheek.
His touch made her heart race. He licked his own lips, looking down at her through tussled dark locks. His fingers pressed another dot to her other cheek. His free hand moved to cup her jawline, forcing her to look up at him before, with gentle motions, he began to blend the rouge into a soft gradient. One cheek, then the other.
The room felt quiet. Burning eyes on them grazed her skin but it didn’t make her stomach churn with anxiety. It felt like only the two of them existed in a perfect bubble. His touch didn’t burn or disgust her; it tingled across her skin making gooseflesh crawl up her arms, up her spine. She worried he could see them through the sheer nylon of her long-sleeved costume. If he did, he didn’t comment on it. His eyes were focused on adding to her beauty, gentle and almost reverent.
“And yours, little swan?” he tilted her chin up as he finished with his work. He loved to watch the rubied glow on her cheeks grow and grow, and not due to his careful make-up’ed handiwork.
“YN,” she said.
He grinned before he repeated her name. His fingers trailed over her cheek, over her chin, his thumb ghosting over her plush lipsticked lips. Before he pulled away and leaned back on the vanity; rouge staining the pure vanity below his hands, sloppily.
“Pretty name for a pretty swanette.”
She smiled up at him, the building, bubbling excitement writhing in her throat. She swallowed.
“Are you new in town? I’ve never seen you at the Opera.” She commented offhandedly.
His grin remained, the corners of his lips curling cat-like. “Mmhm,” he hummed out. “You can say that. I’m from Aurora originally.”
“Aurora… the island Aurora?” she queried with intrigue. “I’ve heard its booming lately. The Jewel of the Atiny Sea.”
He nodded, his smile not fading but his eyes crinkled as he raised his unstained fingers to push her hair aside. Just as an excuse to graze her shoulder she bet.
“I grew up there before it became beautiful,” he admitted. “Its much nicer now – I like to visit on holidays but I don’t miss it.”
“But now you are in Cromer. For how long?” she continued.
He hummed again leaning close. “For however long it takes to woo you?” he flirted.
It made a whirlwind of butterflies dance in her stomach. He watched as her blush extended to the tips of her ears. He laughed lowly.
“You’re teasing me,” she warned with a smirk. “We barely know one another.”
“Maybe,” he retorted. “I know skill and dedication when I see it. I like that.”
There was a ringing of a bell, delicate but a familiar sound for the ballerinas. Some turned their heads towards the stage hand ringing it to give him a smile. Others remained speaking to their patrons or changing their costumes to Act 2’s ensemble. Most remained eavesdropping on their conversation.
“Do you need to hurry along, beautiful swanette?” he fiddled with the crown of feathers pinned to her hair.
“Soon,” she replied simply.
His fingers trailed over her hair, tucking some behind her ear delicately before he grazed his hand down the sleek nylon of her sleeve to take her hand. His hand was decorated in countless rings. Gold, silver, copper. One was a series of silver circles ( …or were they sideways 8’s?) with jewels placed in between stylishly. There was another that was a polished silver with the emblem of a letter she couldn’t quite make out on its face. The metal felt cold against her hot skin. Running a thumb over her knuckles, he squeezed her hand.
“Will you indulge me in another meeting soon? I regret to inform you I can’t stay late after the performance,” he admitted. “I would like to get to know you.”
It was charming the idea he proposed. As if she had any will or way in meeting him. But she was intrigued by him. He was handsome, playful, and new. He was mysterious with how he sat alone in the forbidden, unlucky Box Number 8. She wanted to get to know him… and if he wanted to pay for her time like the other patrons eventually did with their ballerinas, maybe this would be beneficial for the both of them.
She leaned in close like she had seen other ballerinas do with their patrons. Closer than what was appropriate for a lady, but not close enough to have their forms touch. She looked up and smiled, enjoying the way his own ears were beginning to tint a playful red. This was a fun dance between the two of them. She had never enjoyed her suitors so much.
“Yes,” she agreed. “I’d love to talk more, Mr. Jung.”
“Call me Wooyoung.”
#wooyoung x reader#jung wooyoung x reader#ateez x reader#atz x reader#seonghwa x reader#park seonghwa x reader#ateez fanfic#ateez angst#ateez fic#ateez fluff#ateez scenarios#written by haley
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Hi! I had just finished the penacony story quest and umm came out with random ideas….. PLUS after listening to White Night I-
I was wondering what you would think about an AU where time slip is possible and that Yan! Aventurine lost reader (idk how in what situation😭😭😭)
but like yea….
N then like he just literally time slips back to the past before he lost them and like gets super protective???
Idk like I'm-
Omg help idk but like yehhhh
Oh My God your a GENIUS!!! Imagine an au like that!! But let's give it a twist shall we 😉
IN ANOTHER LIFE YOU ARE MINE
YAN! AVENTURINE X READER
Yan! Aventurine in his first and original timeline falls in love with you but keeps it a secret relationship because there are plenty of enemies he made in the way who wanted to hurt you just to hurt him. So he keeps his distance from you in public and in private he is just so clingy and SO loving but in recent times he has just become more distant from you after meeting the trailblazer not only he is a million times busy and with dealing with his past he also started to become more interested with this "FRIEND" of his the trailblazer.
So he spends less and less time as it goes on and you are just so lonely whenever he is not even planning to go home. Or he just kind of ended up ignoring you when he comes home because he is exhausted from all the drama. [he just needs time poor baby]
But then one day an accident happens to you, an accident he never expected, and will forever regret. Of all the people in that accident you his very beloved partner were the only one who perished the most and died alone.
"aventurin-" were your very last words you only wanted to see the love of your life one last time and at least be able to say goodbye to the person who saved you and made your life worthwhile...
BREAKING NEWS!!
the news states the attack was from a man who lost in a gamble storming out from the casino with pent-up anger and ended up venting his anger to a poor woman a passerby who was the first person he spotted to look so weak so he attacked her and stabbed her 10 times to vent his anger because of the lost.
After hearing the news Aventurine can't believe what he is hearing and dashes immediately towards your location. just outside of the casino he was in right now.
in front of the lobby there he saw a group of people gathered in front of the entrance cameras and all.
he never is the type to jump in the scene but this time he jumps in the crowd to look for you to believe that it is not you and you are safe, to hope and in his luck that YOU are safe.
In his mind he is already panicking, sweat going down from his forehead and hands shaking non-stop he can't even control it. Inside of his mind were all prayers and all begging to keep you safe from every harm that past these people you are safe and sound.
But past the one last person he pushes aside instead of your sweet smile and a hug of comfort.. all he sees is blood.. blood everywhere his eyes tremble his bones are about to give up as he looks at the body in front of him there lies you wearing your favorite dress that he gifts you in your anniversary... a sunflower dress being splattered and filled with red blood still running down from your dead body.
and with that is the very last straw of his sanity.
He comes close to your body, and his eyes behind his glasses start to water, overwhelming emotions bearing him and tying in his throat restricting him from breathing and making his heart beat as if being chased by a killer or worse death wanting him dead. and maybe it is better to die right now he thought.
just the sight of your back and your dress being soaked in your own blood was horrendous and worst sight he had laid his eyes upon.
everything was so slow yet so fast at the same time. You were taken away from his grasp and then the next you are being sent away to be mourned by your family. But you don't have a family. he is your family. the one and only family. but because the two of you are still not married and just dating/ engaged he cant have you ... he cant mourn you... And the worst part is he has all the money and power but mourning you, He cant even DO THAT?! He have all this for you for HIM but why? why? WHY?!WWHYWHHYWHYWHWYWHY?????? WHY?!WWHYWHHYWHYWHWYWHY???WHY?!WWHYWHHYWHYWHWYWHY??? WHY?!WWHYWHHYWHYWHWYWHY??? WHY?!WWHYWHHYWHYWHWYWHY???
everything in his mind is starting to crumble as he starts to drink and gamble his life everything is on the line yet he just can't die. HE IS JUST TO LUCKY TO DIE. THEN WHY??? WHY DO YOU NEED TO DIE??? WHY YOU??? was all he can asked day in day out in his life. when he comes home all he can remember is YOU every memory every furniture everything reminds him of you and he just cant he might loses his mind more if he stays more than a hour a minute in once your shared house.
After everything he just cant take it anymore and goes to your house drunk and just starts calling your name waiting for you to respond.
"Yn~ baby~ ! Im home! " He calls drunk inside the house falling flat in the entrance and everything. He closes his eyes and All he can think and hear about is how warm he feels the house is clean and how you will be coming out of the kitchen and calling his name so lovingly.
"aven! Aven! AVEN!" how you will call his nickname how sweet your voice sounds like at first it sounds so far away and now he feels so nostalgic how you shake him the same from all those months ago when he comes home drunk.
He wants to stay like this ... if he can he wants to stay like this forever hearing your voice calling his nickname ...
"more. more call me like that moreMORE MOREMORE "
"KAKAVASHA!!" was when he opened his eyes and bolted his eyes from the voice that called him
and here presents you... in your glory and in your lovely apron. that says 'HAPPY WIFEY HAPPY LIFEY~" It was cheesy but it looked so perfect for you.
"vasha!! are you ok!? " you grabbed his face and all he could feel was how warm you were not cold and wet as he last remembered.
before he knew it tears drops one after the other in his eyes.
"aventurine!! hey come on are you gonna leave me hanging and worried?? did someone beat you? Are you ok?" You grabbed him for a hugged and rubbed your hands in his back
and all he can think is how warm you are how nice it was to feel your warm body against his and how you smell so good. and then he just thinks that he wants this to last forever, he doesn't want this to end, he doesn't want to go back to that dark place. he doesn't want to go back in that nightmare ever again.
Feeling all these emotions he hugged you and started to bawl his eyes out and hugged you tight as if you would be gone in a matter of seconds now.
you can't really know what is going on with him but it truly is rare to see him like this and this time he needs your comfort and love so instead of breaking the hug because of it being too tight You instead hugged him tight and comfort him with your words and back rubs
"its ok, aven, its just a nightmare . shhh its fine , its fine Im here now, Im here" As you keeps your gesture and kinda calm him down his gripped unto you was still on and tight but not that tight.
That is until he falls asleep.
"cute aven" you say as you pinches his cheeks before moving him to your shared bedroom.
Aventurine woke up and just in a panic he searched the room he cant see you there so he rushed down the stares and searched for you outside he was screaming your name and on the verge of crying again. that is until you called for him from the kitchen.
"morning darling!" You say as flipping the pancakes and smiling at him from the kitchen wall.
and there aventurine was feeling relieved that you weren't just a dream.. and even if this is a dream of a hallucination he don't care all he cares about is you and him in this time together eating your pancake and you in front of him smiling happily.
AND AFTER SPENDING MORE AND MORE TIME as he starts to notice that he was in the past a year before your tragedy he promises that he will. HE WILL. PROTECT YOU.
may it caused of his death he dont care he will never ever EVER going to see you in that state again.
WITH out you knowing he actually in this timeline he did kill your killer after he tracked him down so that he wont be able to do the murder again. Aventurine puts more in security and becomes more and more clingy since then.
But one thing he will put first. HE ASKED YOU TO BE HIS WIFE This time he will never ever gonna regret pausing to make you his wife. This time YOU ARE HIS WIFE.
He wont ever EVER FACE ALL THOSE HAPPENING AGAIN. He wont ever make you feel sad and distant and he wont make you regret saying YES to his proposal now that you are going to be his WIFE.
He will plan the wedding immediately.
HE WON'T WASTE ANY TIME ANYMORE HE ALREADY WASTED A LOT OF TIME IN THE PAST HE won't MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE.
Suggested warning!!
and fckng his wife should be the first priority right~ so he does~
Every night and every possible day he has been so horny to the point of fcking you in every possible place in the house on your dates in your backyard, and even in his office. EVERYWHERE
IN THIS LIFE YOU ARE HIS AND NO ONE CAN HAVE YOU AND TAKE YOU AWAY FROM HIS GRASP AND IN THIS LIFE.
[this is the birth of the most possessive and overprotective yandere aventurine who loves love LOVES you very much ]
ARS: Donee!! damn anon thank you for the idea! but really I was not gonna make it since been busy but I guess my writer brain just turns on immediately thinking about the plot and how i would write the story I wish it was to your liking anon! I wish this is how my brain would work in my exam wow that finished within one hour hahaha anyways have a great Day!!
©2024arsonlookers: do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.
#fem reader#x reader#female reader#hsr aventurine#aventurine thoughts#aventurine#angst#aventurine x reader#yandere things#time travel#yandere male#yandere aventurine x reader#yandere adventurine#yandere aventurine#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail#hsr x reader#hsr penacony#star rail#fanfic#fandom#honkai fanfic#male yandere#reader inserts
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I'll Be Seeing You
Pairing: Jack Reacher x Black!Fem!reader/plus size reader
Warnings: 18+ only. MINORS DNI. You are in charge of your own reading experience. PIV, Cursing, SMUT, ANGST, fingering (fem receiving), nipple play, Sorry if I missed others. No spoilers for the show.
Summary: When Reacher reached your town, he was lucky enough to meet you the first day. You made him feel things he’d never felt before. And though there was the sad tug of goodbye in every interaction, he couldn’t help but stay one more night.
AO3 Link
Word count: 2,253k
A/N: Ask and ye shall receive, @kiwi-jelly-mochi! LOL. I rewatched Reacher tonight. Need that man badly! This is what my brain considers a drabble. Enjoy! Toss a coin to your blogger by leaving a comment, reblog, or unhinged ask.
Reacher had a lot of adjusting to do when it came to you. He was a man that prided himself on being as free as possible, never sticking anywhere for too long. He didn’t stay in the same place twice. There was too much world to see and his boots were made for walking.
However, when he blew through your hometown, he saw you sitting outside of a local coffee cafe, nose deep in a book and sipping on hot coffee. A glance was all it took for him to know that he had to meet you. Talk to you.
It took some convincing. You kept saying you didn’t usually go for “white guys”. Like you were trying to convince yourself not to say yes to him. That only made him try harder. Stick around the town longer than usual, actually finding the place relaxing for once.
No matter where he went, trouble always seemed to follow. Not here. Not with you. It was like you cast some type of spell over the town, warding it from any evil intent swinging through. If he believed in such things, he’d firmly believe you cast a spell on him.
It could explain how his chest grew tight whenever you looked at him. Or when you smiled at something small like when flower petals landed on your hand or when you heard children laughing. You were so sweet all the time. So full of love and optimism besides all the horrors in the world.
He strangely found that he didn’t mind it. He wanted to soak up more of it. Be around it. Around you. Interested in the way you make him feel. Stirring up feelings he wasn’t sure how to interpret.
His favorite thing so far was when you called him your robot. He knew he wasn’t the most expressive, the most welcoming. He’d been called everything under the sun by men twice your height and weight, upset that someone treated them like an adult for once.
He would be lying if he didn’t like your attempts to make him smile naturally. Doing funny impressions, making funny faces at him, bumping your shoulder with his. He played along, doubling down on being a robot but that was okay.
He liked that you were the beauty to his brute. You made him feel like Fred Flinstone whenever you blinked those cute eyes at him. You let him turn his brain off, live in the moment.
Speaking of, you were sitting on your couch, drinking your favorite drink and listening to old vinyl records your grandmother left you. You weren’t really into the music, but listening to it made you feel closer to her. Mourn the relationship you never had. Okay, so maybe he couldn’t always turn it off.
In his mind, details mattered. He wanted to bask in all of your details. The moles, the scars, the lines in the palm of your hand. You’ve lived and that made you the most interesting thing in the world to him.
Cool jazz music played, Billie’s voice crooning, and you lightly bobbed your head, looking at him. He smiled at you, loving the soft way your eyes crinkled. You took another sip and tilted your head at him. “What you thinkin’ about Mr. Robot?” You asked. You reached out and tugged at the corner of his mouth.
“You,” he said, seeing no reason to be coy.
“What about me?” You asked.
“How pretty you’d look in my lap,” he said.
You giggled and shook your head. But you placed your drink down on the coffee table and scooted closer. “You’re gonna make it hard when you finally say goodbye,” you said, your voice wobbling. You kept on a brave face, smiling despite it all.
He told you that he wasn’t the sticking around type. The more he stayed here, the more he gained familiar haunts with you day by day, he wasn’t so sure that was true anymore. Wanderlust was his first love. Needing to roam thanks to his military background. Never putting down roots. Never staying in any one place long enough to make connections. Just a mean right hook and an itch whenever he saw injustice.
Yet, whenever he thought of leaving, his chest would seize and he’d have to sit there and breathe through the panic. He knew he was in too deep already, but he needed one more night. One more day to wrap himself inside you and pretend to live there. Pretend to claim you. Pretend that you’ll always remember him when you’ve found the love of your life and forgot all about him.
Just one more. That was all he needed. Then he’d be strong enough. Then he’d be the only one strong enough to leave you.
For now, he pulled you by the hand to come sit in his lap. You giggled, scrambling across the lush blue cushions to climb into his lap. He also loved it when you got excited. The way you lived out loud, expressed emotions clearly and vividly. So much so, even a brute like him could pick up on it. Become infected by it. Feel it latch onto his bloodstream and never let up.
He pushed your black flowered dress up your thighs as you settled into his lap. He grabbed two big handfuls of your ass, squeezing it hard just like you needed it. You growled, rolling against his crotch like a needy slut.
You weren’t wearing panties and he chuckled as he gripped your ass, giving it a light smack. “No panties this time?” He asked.
“They just get in the way. Someone has a penchant for ripping them,” you said, pointedly looking at him. You leaned down, pressing your lips to his. He hummed, licked his lips, and leaned in for another kiss. You indulged him, bringing your hands to cup his strong square jaw and scratch at his stubble.
“You’re right, they’re in the way,” he said, grinning naturally, just for you. Your eyes lit up and you squirmed in his lap.
His dick was throbbing with your movements. With the subtle friction from your breasts pushed into his chest. He squeezed your ass again, giving it another smack. He began to kiss your neck, licking the pulse in your neck and causing you to purr. You melted in his hands, falling against him as he moved further down.
He used his teeth to pull down the cups of your dress, freeing your breasts and humming in satisfaction. Fuck, he loved your breasts. Loved how they were the perfect shape and size. He leaned down, needing to feel your soft flesh in his mouth.
He latched onto a nipple, sucking hard. You squealed, hitting his shoulder. He chuckled, sucking harder. He tortured the little nub, feeling it peak beneath his tongue.
“Oh, fuck, Reacher, I could write entire books about this mouth,” you moaned, throwing your head back. You poked your chest out, giving him full and complete access. Just as he liked.
“Please do, I’d love to read it,” he whispered against your titty. You chuckled, bouncing in his lap and rubbing against his dick. He felt lightning strikes straight to his balls, getting heavier with a thick load just for you.
He let go of your titty with a wet pop, leaning back far enough to admire his handy work. Satisfied, he moved on to the other, suckling it and moaning as you rubbed in just the right place. Just enough for him to buck his hips.
“I need you, Reacher,” you whispered into his hair, kissing his head.
“I got you,” he said. For now. For this moment. For this brief interlude in between towns when he discovered all there was and planned to move on to the next. The next people. He wouldn’t find another you, however.
He picked you up effortlessly, scooting you back on his thighs so that he could free himself. He groaned as his dick was released from his jeans, pressure finally eased. You leaned over to the end table, grabbing a discreet foil package.
He’d been here an entire week and he’d fucked you every single day. Never without a condom. He wished to feel you completely. To soak his dick with your slick. Your essence. The very heart of you. He wanted it. And that was exactly why he couldn’t.
If you were an old blues record, you were one of the rare, more optimistic ones. The ones that hurt his heart and made him think at the same time. You sounded like forever in every ring around the record, the delicate scratch of the needle. You needed someone to handle you with care. With love. To play you every Sunday right as the sun went down, fresh glass of lemonade beside. To protect, to hold.
And that was why he never forgot the condom. Neither did you. You handed it to him and he opened it, rolling it on, and he used his fingers to gauge how wet you were.
Fuck, you were dripping. He groaned and went back to kissing your chest. Working his way up to your jaw, to the corners of your mouth, kissing you fully on the lips. Heat washed over him, a burning fire under his ass to get inside you as quickly as possible.
He played with your clit as he lined himself up, sinking you down on his dick. “Unf, fuck,” he moaned. You didn’t even grimace or cry out that time. A week was all it took for you to get acclimated to his size.
“You’re killing me,” he said.
You giggled, pressing kisses into his face. He fucking loved it. Your hands went around his neck, starting to lift up and down onto his dick.
Your breathing was shaky but you persisted, lifting all the way off of him and then sinking right back down. You groaned as he seemed to hit some kind of spot inside of you, rubbing his thick mushroom head along your inner walls.
“Shit, fuck me, Reacher. Fuck me, please,” you begged.
Reacher hooked his hands under your thighs and sped up, fucking you onto his dick with a little more speed. You cried, soaking his dick. He could feel it, but he couldn’t really feel it.
“Oh shit, right there. Right there, Reacher, right there,” you whimpered.
He listened. He kept the same pace, the same thrust, spearing you on his massive dick. “Let me hear you,” he said.
You cried harder, whimpered longer, moaned in a tinny voice that sent more lightning strikes to his dick. He seemed to swell just hearing how needy you were. Felt how wet you were for him. He pretended that it was only for him. That you would only ever get this wet for him. To bless him with this side of you. This unregulated, wholesome, completely authentic part of you.
“Louder, louder,” he said, panting, thrusting up to meet you bouncing on his dick. You felt amazing. Perfect. So perfect.
Your cries got louder, moaning battling the music still crooning in the late afternoon. Your living room was small but it suited you. Everything about the space was warm and comforting. Even the couch. He sank pleasantly into it, firm enough to meet your sopping wet pussy.
Your titties bounced in his face. He watched your pert brown nipples dangling like sweet berries in front of his face. He resisted the urge to suck on them again, instead looking up at you.
Your mouth was open, tongue peeking out. Your eyes were low, spaced out, and the most beautiful sight of all. Better than any piece of artwork. Any genius masterpiece. Your nails dug into his shoulders. He barely felt it.
He wasn’t arrogant enough to not feel pain, but he was a big guy. He could take a punch and he could certainly take the way you gripped onto him for dear life. “Oh, Reacher, I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum,” you moaned, diving down for a kiss.
“Let me feel it,” he said, looking into your eyes.
You tightened your hold, gritted your teeth before your jaw went slack and you shook on his dick. He kept bouncing you, felt how your pussy tightened and pulsed on his dick. He moaned, wanting to keep looking at you but also wanting to let the sensation take over.
Sensation won out as he dropped his head back against the couch cushion, smacking your ass as you moaned from your orgasm. He was close. Now that you came, he could take it a step further. Slide in deeper. Bounce you quicker.
His balls tightened as he finally climaxed, hot sperm shooting into the condom. He moaned, grabbing onto your ass for an anchor point. He grunted as he finished, looking down at where you were connected.
Your skin was slick with sweat, chest heaving with breaths. He grinned at you, couldn’t help wanting to make you smile. He was going to hate himself when he had to make you sad.
“I think I’m gonna stay one more night,” he said, bringing you into a kiss. He licked your lips and you gasped and he slipped his tongue inside, needing to taste more. Do more.
“Okay, but only one more,” you said, against his lips. You got an evil glint in your eye and he wondered if you weren’t up to something devious tonight. He couldn’t wait to find out.
There will be more! The Secret Jack Reacher Files
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Qinat Be'eri (A Lamentation for Be'eri) by Yagel Haroush
youtube
Yagel Haroush is a singer, a kamancheh and ney player, a poet, a composer of piyutim (traditional religious songs) and a teacher of Middle Eastern music. After completing his studies at the Jerusalem Academy of Music, Yagel earned a master’s degree in philosophy at Ben-Gurion University of the Negev, and was awarded the Daoud Al-Kuwaiti Scholarship for musical excellence. Yagel specializes in performing and composing music based on maqam, the Middle Eastern modal system. He studied the Persian form of maqam, known as dastgah, with Prof. Piris Eliyahu and his son Mark Eliyahu, and Arab maqam with Prof. Taiseer Elias. As a child, he absorbed the liturgical poetic tradition of the Moroccan piyut (religious song) at his grandfather’s home in the southern Israeli city of Dimona, where every Shabbat, a group of paytanim (composers and singers of piyutim) would gather. Later, he delved into the secrets of the baqashot (“supplications”), a Sephardic mystical singing tradition practiced by Moroccan Jews. Yagel’s ensemble, Shir Yididot, performs original reinterpretations of this tradition that situate the baqashot within the broader context of Middle Eastern mystical song. The group released its debut album in 2016. Yagel is also the founder of the Study Center for Makam and Piyut, where he teaches composition and performance, as well as theoretical performance studies based on Jewish sources – philosophy, Kabbalah and Midrash. He also founded the School of Oriental Music in the Negev in the town of Yeruham, and Kedem, a school for composition in the spirit of maqam in Jerusalem.
Qinat Be’eri was written by Yagel Haroush in the month of Marḥeshban after the massacres on 7 October and disseminated on social media. (The text of the qinah here is as shared on the website Kipa on 7 January 2024.) The initial English translation and notes was shared by Yosef Goldman and Josh Fleet. (These notes were very lightly edited for clarity.) On Tishah b’Av, a second English translation was offered by Dr. Susan Weingarten. –Aharon Varady
Eikhah [1] – Alas! my well [2] has turned into my grave. And the day of my light [3] has become my darkness And all fruit has been destroyed and my singing overturned. My eyes pour forth water [4] from the depth of my brokenness.
Eikhah — Israel on a day of calling to God. Life was requested but chaos received Elder and infant wallow in blood. [6] His festival desecrated by a merciless enemy. My eyes pour forth water from the depth of my brokenness.
Eikhah — mothers, girls, and young women Taken into captivity as in the days of pogroms And fences were breached righteous sheep And the dancing ceased and the songs of my singers My eyes pour forth water from the depth of my brokenness
And eikhah — I wonder, you who enobled her — How long shall a nation live in upheaval How long shall her stature be brought low to the ground And now, arise to kindle my lamp [7] And from the wellsprings of your mercy heal my brokenness And my eye [8] that pours forth will water Be’eri
The opening word of the Book of Lamentations, “איכה” — translated as “alas!” or “how?!?” — is often used in Jewish poetry of lament — ḳinnot — that memorialize the Jewish people, from the liturgy for mourning the Temple’s destruction to today.
Be’eri means “my well.” [Be’eri here also refers to Kibbutz Be’eri, the site of one of the massacres that took place on 7 October 2023. — ANV]
A reference to the festival of Simḥat Torah on which the massacres took place. In TaNaKh and Rabbinic literature, Torah is compared to both light and water. “For the commandment is a lamp, the teaching of Torah is a light” (Proverbs 6:23) and “A flowing stream, a fountain of wisdom” (Proverbs 18:4). Also find Shir haShirim Rabbah 1:2.
"For these do I weep, my eyes flow with tears; far from me is a comforter who might revive my spirit; my children are forlorn, for the foe has prevailed” (Lamentations 1:16)
i.e. Simḥat Torah.
Find Ezekiel 15:6, “When I passed by you and saw you wallowing in your blood, I said to you: ‘Live despite your blood’…”
It is you who light my lamp; YHVH my elo’ah lights up my darkness” (Psalms 18:29).
Hebrew, עין (‘ayin), means both “spring” and “eye.”
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Chevalier Michel: Even If You Die
From A Hidden Oath: King of the BEAST (2024 Election) - Collection Event
Thank you @dark-frosted-heart for providing the SE video!
—
All was dyed crimson in the evening–
???: ...Excuse me.
The setting sun mercilessly illuminated the figure that entered the room soundlessly.
It was the secret agent who was always assigned to guard Emma.
Lucien: Lady Emma has returned.
Chevalier: ...You may leave.
Lucien: Yes, sir.
The secret agent bowed and left the room.
Chevalier: .............
With a light sigh, he gathered the documents he had spread out on his desk and stood up.
-
Emma: Prince Chevalier...!
As soon as she entered the room, Emma opened her eyes wide, which she had been wiping with linen.
Emma was dressed in black - mourning clothes.
Emma: I'll make tea now.
Emma, with her tear-stained eyes, put on her usual smile.
(It's not a situation where you can force a smile.)
Chevalier: There's no need.
Emma: But... ah.
I grabbed Emma's arm and pulled her to sit on the sofa.
I sat next to her and embraced her shoulders, and Emma quietly leaned against me.
Emma: ...I apologize for my unsightly appearance.
Chevalier: Did someone say you looked unsightly?
Emma: No, no one...
Chevalier: Then there is no need to worry.
(Those tears are not the kind that should be forcibly stopped.)
Emma: ...Y-yes...
Her small shoulders trembled with a sniffle.
(It's been a while since I've seen Emma cry this much.)
(You cry like this even for the death of someone who isn't even your family.)
Today, Emma attended a funeral.
The deceased was an elderly man in town who Emma had known since she was a child.
When attending the funerals of nobles and knights as the next queen, Emma maintains a resolute demeanor, but it seems she cannot do so at the funerals of old acquaintances.
(In the past, I would have dismissed it as trivial...)
Suddenly, a memory from the past flashed through my mind.
*flashback*
Clavis: Chev, if you're heartbroken, shall I offer you a word of comfort?
Clavis: The death of your mother must have affected even you.
Chevalier: ...No?
Chevalier: I have knowledge of human emotions from books. I thought I might feel something...
Chevalier: I feel "nothing."
*flashback over*
(I still feel nothing about that woman's death.)
(But... if you were to die before me...)
( ............ )
An indescribable discomfort ran through my chest, and I pushed away any further thoughts.
Chevalier: ––Speak.
Emma: Huh...?
Chevalier: About the deceased.
Chevalier: He must have been someone you cared deeply about, to make you cry so much?
Emma looked at me with a slightly surprised expression, then awkwardly smiled and began to speak haltingly.
Emma: ...He was a lively old man who everyone in town knew.
Emma: He was baking sweets until just before he passed away, and took his last breath surrounded by his family.
Emma: He woke up at 4 a.m. every morning to bake sweets, and if you went early in the morning, he would always give you extra.
Emma: The other day, I went to buy some secretly, and he remembered me and said, "I'm glad..."
Instead of words, large tears fell from her reddened eyes.
Emma: I'm sorry...
Chevalier: There is no need to apologize.
Emma: But... even though Prince Chevalier is by my side, I'm showing you such a pathetic sight...
I lifted her chin as she tried to look down.
No matter how much she wiped them away, tears kept spilling from her wet eyes.
Chevalier: I do not think your current appearance is pathetic.
Emma: ...
I placed my hand on her cheek, and Emma placed her hand on top of mine.
The sight of Emma, her eyes closed as if feeling the warmth, seemed incredibly endearing.
Emma: Being pampered by Prince Chevalier makes me happy and cry even more.
Emma: But please, just for today, let me indulge in your kindness.
Emma: If I keep being sad, the old man in heaven will worry.
(Heaven, huh?)
(Prayers for the deceased are usually a waste of time. No matter how much you pray, that person is no longer in this world.)
(It would be far more rational to carry on the will of the deceased and move towards the future, rather than wasting time praying.)
(But... if it were you, I would also dwell on my thoughts.)
(It may be meaningless, but I don't think it's worthless.)
(Because you taught me that loving someone, like being loved, has meaning.)
Chevalier: Emma.
(Even if you die, I probably won't shed any tears.)
(But... I swear I will continue to love you for the rest of my life.)
Emma: Mmm...
I kissed her tear-stained lips.
As if to envelop her heart, shaken by loneliness, I continued to hold Emma until the curtain of night fell.
FIN
#ikemen series#cybird#cybird otome#cybird ikemen#chevalier michel#2024 ikemen prince collection event#chevalier michel short story#chevalier michel collection event story#chevalier michel ikepri
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Ghost never really learned how to properly tie a tie.
He never had reason to. Never had a father that would teach him, either. And when it comes to formal dress after joining the military, he’d always fidget and tug and prod at knots until they looked right, whether or not they were done properly.
He’s tried looking up tutorials, sure, but it’s just… overwhelming as to how many ways ties can be knotted. So he never bothers. Just does his best to pretend like he knows even when he’s so, so lost.
Because it doesn’t matter.
At least, not until—years down the line—his and Soap’s wedding.
Ghost figures it’s his time to finally learn, then, because it has to be perfect. He can’t mimic a knot for such an important day, just praying for the best, he has to do his tie up properly.
But he can’t.
He tries, over and over, watching videos and looking at picture-by-picture instructions, but he can’t. Ghost gets frustrated, hands trembling more and more every attempt until eventually he just… gives up. Rips off the tie and resigns himself to slumping into the nearest chair, running fingers desperately through hair he’d taken so long to make look nice.
Soap finds him much too close to the start of the ceremony, quick to rush to his side and ask what’s wrong.
Ghost isn’t sure when the tears had started welling, or when his bottom lip had started to wobble. He lets Soap gently guide his hands away from his head, pressing thumbs lightly into open palms.
“You’ll think it’s stupid,” Ghost mutters. His tie is loose around his neck, an irritating reminder of why he’s yet to be ready to meet Soap at the end of the aisle.
Soap smiles softly at him. He looks so handsome, as always—him and his perfectly tied tie.
“I doubt it,” he says, oh-so kindly. “Never is.”
Ghost laughs quietly, the sound shaky, watery. He swallows the lump that threatens to rise in his throat, peering into the comfort of Soap’s eyes to lend him strength as he confesses, “I can’t get my fucking tie right.”
“That’s all?” Ghost nods and Soap sighs, sitting down on his knees, pressing the back of Ghost’s hands to his forehead like an odd sort of worship. “Thank God. Had me worried you were rethinking things.”
"I'd never rethink this, I just—" Ghost takes a shuddering breath. "Fuck, I'm sorry."
"Don't be." Ghost mourns the loss of Soap's warmth as he lets go of his hands. He lifts a hand to drag through Ghost's hair, surely mussing it in a way that looks better than the tangled mess Ghost had probably left it as. "All you had to do was ask for help."
Ghost's gaze falls to the ground as shame burns his ears. "I just didn't want you to think—"
"I'd never think any less of you for not bein' able to tie a tie, Simon," Soap assures him. "There's a stupid amount of ways to do it 'right', anyway. C'mere."
Ghost leans forward enough for Soap to have a comfortable grip on his tie. He watches Soap's face the entire time, the subtle concentration in his expression, though surely he should be paying attention to how he ties the knot instead.
He doesn't move even as Soap has switched to adjusting his collar and smoothing the artificial wrinkles of his dress shirt.
"Pure braw," Soap murmurs. He sits up to capture Ghost in a kiss, sweet and innocent and comforting.
"You're supposed to save that for after the vows," Ghost says once they break apart.
Soap barks out a laugh. "Prude," he teases.
He stands slowly, then, wincing when his knees crack as he gets up. Soap offers out a hand to Ghost, of which Ghost happily accepts.
Soap grins at Ghost, then, bright and blinding and full of love.
"Let's go get married, then, shall we?"
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“I need you more and more, and the great world grows wider. . . every day you stay away — I miss my biggest heart; my own goes wandering round, and calls for Susie. . . Susie, forgive me Darling, for every word I say — my heart is full of you. . . yet when I seek to say to you something not for the world, words fail me. . . I shall grow more and more impatient until that dear day comes, for til now, I have only mourned for you; now I begin to hope for you.”
— Emily Dickinson, in a letter to Susan Huntington Gilbert
#for til now I have only mourned for you now I begin to hope for you...!#w#letters#emily dickinson#this is how much I miss you talking
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── .✦ HOLLOW WALLS
⌗ Contents ★ deceased!femreader x mourning!Choso kamo
⌗ Synopsis ★ After losing the love of his life, Choso is left alone in the home they built together, surrounded by memories he can’t escape. Struggling to cope with the overwhelming silence, he’s forced to confront the depth of his grief and the love he can never let go.
⌗ CW ★ Grief and Loss, the emotional aftermath of losing a loved one, Depictions of hopelessness and emotional numbness, Emotional Breakdown: Intense scenes of crying and mourning, Themes of loneliness and struggling to cope, Mention of Death, Implied loss of a partner.
⌗ Sia here! ★ This was ready and scheduled for yesterday but like tumblr wanted to be a hater and saved you guys from some very sad Choso angst (AGAIN) you will take the angst. And you will enjoy it. 😋 I’m always posting before bed so after this is posted I’ll probably be asleep even though I had a very very long nap after school today I shall be sleeping again and I’ll never ever get tired of it🫡. OKAY ENJOY GUYS haagahahaha ahahahahhs (I’m laughing because you won’t be enjoying this, call me gege atp)
Choso sat on the edge of the bed you once shared, his hands hanging limply between his knees. The room was suffocating, heavy with a silence that seemed to mock him. Each creak of the floorboards, every faint groan of the walls, carried with it a memory of you. Memories that pressed against his chest until he could barely breathe. The bedroom was frozen in time, untouched since the day you were gone. Your favorite blanket still draped across the armchair in the corner, the faintest trace of your shampoo lingering on the pillowcase. He couldn’t bring himself to move any of it. To do so felt like erasing you.
The clock on the nightstand ticked loudly, breaking the silence like a cruel metronome marking time he no longer cared to measure. Days bled into nights here. Without you, there was no rhythm, no reason. He clenched his fists, nails biting into his palms, as his gaze fell on the photograph sitting on the dresser. You were smiling in it, your arm around him, your eyes bright with life. He remembered how your laugh had burst out when he grumbled about how awkward he looked in photos. You’d kissed his cheek right after the picture was taken, telling him he was perfect just the way he was. Now, he couldn’t look at that photo without feeling like a knife was twisting in his gut. Choso hated being here. The home you had built together, the space that once radiated warmth and love, was now a mausoleum of memories. He had tried to stay out as much as possible—working late, wandering the streets aimlessly—but eventually, he always had to come back. Back to the house that still smelled like you, sounded like you, felt like you.
He swallowed hard, his throat tight and dry. His body felt heavy as he sank down onto the floor, leaning back against the bed frame. His trembling fingers ran over the edge of the blanket draped on the armchair, remembering the way you’d wrap yourself in it and curl into his arms. “I miss you,” he choked out, his voice breaking. The tears came fast, unrelenting. He covered his face with his hands, but it did nothing to muffle the sobs that racked his body. He cried until his chest ached, until his breath came in gasping shudders. “I love you,” he whispered into the hollow stillness, his voice barely audible over the sound of his own grief. “I love you so much… I don’t know how to do this without you.” His words dissolved into the quiet, swallowed by the emptiness of the room. Choso crumpled onto the floor, his tears soaking the carpet, his shoulders shaking violently. There was no one to comfort him now, no hand to rub soothing circles on his back, no voice to tell him it would all be okay.
The house remained silent, offering no solace. Only echoes of what used to be.
© All rights reserved to @/adoresia on tumblr.
Please do not copy, translate or repost my work on any other platforms.
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#🖋️ sierra writes#jjk#jjk fluff#jjk fanfic#jjk spoilers#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fanart#jjk x reader#jjk x you#choso angst#choso x you#choso fluff#choso x y/n#jujutsu kaisen choso#choso kamo#choso x reader#jjk choso#choso smau#jujutsu kaisen manga#jujustu kaisen#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu sorcerer#jujutsu kaisen chapter 269#gege akutami
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I'll Crawl Home to Her
Dragon Age: the Veilguard, some spoilers for plot, spoilers for Emmrichs romance Pairing: F!Rook (Mourn Watch) x Emmrich Volkarin Rating: M Summary: Eight significant times Emmrich Volkarin called Rook by her real name.
Length: ~2500 words
Read on ao3 here!
Emmrich Volkarin first called Calliope ‘Rook’ Ingellvar by her name before she went by Rook.
“Miss Calliope,” Emmrich called over the heads of the handful of students leaving his classroom. At the sound of her name coming from her favourite professor, Calliope instantly flushed and motioned to some companions that they should go ahead without her. “A word if you don’t mind.”
“Yes, Professor?” She asked biting her lip. Professor Volkarin was her favourite, not just for his fantastic necromancy skills, or how eloquently he explained such fantastic concepts, but he was also very attractive. At age 35 his hair was greying at the temples, lending him to look even more distinguished than his carefully put-together clothing suggested.
“I’ve heard from others about your certain... proclivity, to have some ‘adventures’ outside of the Necropolis,” Emmrich began, shifting her paper to the top of the pile, noticeable stains and grease marks littering the off-white sheets. A disapproving frown crossed his face. “I will ask that your future work be submitted with less detritus than the most recent assignment.”
Calliope looked at her paper and a brighter red coloured her cheeks and chest, “Of course Professor, I’m so sorry. I swear I don’t usually do work outside of the library, but something happened with –.”
Emmrich held up his hand to stop the ramble from leaving Calliope’s mouth. A soft smile graced his lips, “Not to worry, my dear, but your work is excellent and you should take pride in it. Now please, I have taken up so much of your time already, run along and join your friends.”
The second time Emmrich says her name it’s when they meet again, 15 years later.
Rook had yet to admit to Bellara, or Myrna and Vorgoth, that she did indeed know Professor Emmrich Volkarin, and of his work. Luckily her time away from the Watchers had helped steel her emotions, calm her once easy-to-flush cheeks, and made lies flow smoothly, but she had been anxious all week in the lead-up to their Necropolis visit. Bellara even commented on her makeup that morning, making Rook flush and attempt to wipe some away with the back of her gloved hand.
-
“Rook! Lovely to meet a fellow Watcher,” Emmrich exclaimed as he gripped her hand, shaking it politely. “I must confess I apologise if I have you confused, but Myrna had mentioned a ‘Calliope’ to me?”
Calliope’s face dropped from her measured welcoming smile to a startled expression. Letting go of Emmrich’s hand, she attempted to speak voice unsteady, cheeks flushed. “Uh, yes Professor, Calliope Ingellvar. My friends call me Rook. It uh, caught on in the year since I left the Necropolis.”
“Ah, no worries, my friend. I shall follow suit.” Emmrich turned with a flourish, leading Bellara and Calliope to the Belfry. Calliope internally kicking herself over the interaction.
The third time Emmrich said her name was after they shared tea in the Memorial Gardens.
“Speaking of home, have we really never met around the Necropolis before? Even in passing?” Emmrich’s eyebrows raised as he asked the question. Rook’s eyes widened feeling like a halla in the lamplight. An uncomfortable feeling churned in her stomach as she debated how much of her past to reveal. Especially, how enamoured she was with Emmrich as a young adult.
“Oh um, I don’t remember everything from my scholar days. I only took a few advanced classes. Got too... busy.” Rook’s mouth dried at the admission. It was a half truth, she remembered nearly every moment of her schooling, growing up with the senior Watchers as guardians, and more books for company than friends, she was in advanced classes at a younger age than many of the other Watchers her age.
“You know, I’d heard we had a young Watcher getting into scrapes on the streets of Nevarra around then...” Emmrich mused, Rook could almost see the cogs whir in Emmrich’s brain as he searched his memories for a young Rook.
“They weren’t scrapes! They were... extracurricular learning opportunities.”
“Aha! That's it! Calliope, you were in my Advanced Fade Studies and Etheric Flows class!”
Hearing her name from Emmrich’s mouth took her breath away. She had rather hoped he wouldn’t remember her from her scholar years. Calliope couldn’t deny the butterflies fluttering in her body as he remembered her, almost regressing to her 16 year old self, and she endeavoured to change the topic from herself as quickly as possible.
“Yes, I... your class was most enlightening Emmrich, but I couldn’t help but hear you mention homesickness?”
The Fourth time Emmrich says her name, it’s a revelation.
Fighting on the beaches of Rivain always pissed Rook off. It was always too hot, and too sandy. She hated the sand in Rivain, it felt... so coarse compared to the finely milled sand that tracked through the Necropolis. Of course, the scenery of Rivain was stunning and the smell of the ocean air was refreshing, as long as the Antaam weren’t burning gaatlok in her general direction.
Rook dove for the gaatlok-armed Antaam, pushing her body to flip and attack the hulking Qunari with her imbued daggers. Necromancy pulsing from her hands as she struck true. Pulling her weapons free she could hear Emmrich and Taash finish off the last of the Antaam soldiers who had ambushed them.
“They just seem to be around every bloody corner here, don’t they?” she exclaimed, wiping her daggers on her bloodstained clothing.
“Until we can get to the Dragon King,” Taash remarked. The team had tried to track down the Dragon King to no avail, however his poorly planned traps had to lead somewhere.
“We’ll get to him soon enough Taash, then you can set him straight on Dragons having queens!” Rook stretched to pat Taash on their shoulder in consolidation. Suddenly a loud explosion pierced Rook’s ears, throwing her to the ground some distance away from where she stood. “Calliope!” Emmrich shouted over the ringing in her ears, she felt sand being kicked near her face as Emmrich’s familiar boots came into frame, and a distant squelching noise of an axe being buried into a body barely registered. “My darling are you alright?” Emmrich asked, sending his warming magic over her body to check for internal injuries.
“I think I’m okay, can you help me up?” Emmrich slowly manoeuvred her to sit, taking stock further before helping Calliope to her feet. He gripped her waist tightly to keep her steady as she threatened to sway, waiting for Taash to make their way over.
“Hey, Emmrich.”
“Yes, Taash?” Emmrich was exasperated, whatever could Taash want at a time like this?
“Why did you call Rook ‘Calliope’? She’s called Rook?”
The Fifth and Sixth time Emmrich called her Calliope, she had a cold.
Emmrich looked up from his desk to the sound of Manfred hissing and raising his tray, proud of his assortment of tea, soup and some bread. “Ah Manfred, have you prepared this for dear Rook?” A pleased hiss resonated through Manfred's skull, Emmrich straightened the papers on the desk and rose from his chair, peering through the windows above to where the sun was coming through the windows. “It is about time to give her another tonic. Thank you, Manfred, I can take this next door.”
Emmrich gently knocked on Rooks’s door, hearing soft snores from behind, he quietly pushed open the door and rounded the middle of the room to the table closest to the sofa. The dim light from candles and the fade fish illuminating his path. Placing the tray down, he crouched down near Rook’s face, and gently rocked her, “Rook? My darling, it’s time to wake up.”
A grumbling “Mmph” was the reply he received. “Calliope, I brought you some soup.” He drawled elongating her name, much like himself, he knew the food would rouse her from drowsiness. She was often second to the kitchen when food was served, her childhood in the Necropolis meant she often had to go without, and why she often picked up odd jobs around Nevarra City to purchase items that weren’t second or third hand.
Calliope’s eyes slowly opened, blinking, she noticed even with her lying down and Emmrich crouching he towered over her. As she shuffled to extricate herself from the blanket and sit up there was a thud of a book dropping to the floor. On instinct Calliope reached for it, however Emmrich’s longer reach picked it up far swifter than her lethargic body could match. The book read ‘The Obverse of Reality: Studies of the Fade in the Waking World.’ A soft gasp left Emmrich as he noticed the book as one of his very own works, Calliope’s copy was too well-thumbed and too battered to be from his own study in the Lighthouse. Calliope noticed his recognition of the title, her face becoming hotter despite the chill that cloaked her body after removing the blanket. “You never told me you have read any of my works, my dear.”
A shyness crept over Calliope, her eyes darting away from Emmrich’s face as she replied, the congestion in her nose lending her voice a nasal tone, “Well, I was in this class, I had to get your book, it’s even a first edition!”
“It must have been sixteen years since I published this –” Emrich mused,” I'm sure I’ve published much more recent findings on the Fade, especially since it started to thin.”
“I like it, I can hear your voice as I read it.” Calliope started, her voice slowly getting quieter as she admitted, “It’s um – comforting, to read a book I know so well.” Emmrich rose from his crouch, placing a gentle kiss on Calliope’s forehead and moving to sit next to her on the sofa. His earthy scent relaxed Calliope instantly. “Well, how about I read some passages aloud as you eat my dear, I also brought another tonic, it should keep your symptoms at bay and allow you to rest.” Said Emmrich, motioning to the tray on the side table.
Emmrich’s voice was gentle as he read, often musing on additions he would make to the text, or discussing Calliope’s scrawled annotations in the margins. Making note that she used tiny skull shapes to punctuate her ‘i’s’ and exclamation marks. After Calliope ate, she leaned back against the sofa, her head resting on Emmrich’s arm as he continued reading. Emmrich turned the page to the next chapter and Calliope stiffened as she saw the doodle on the page, Emmrich let out a deep chuckle, noting the words written in a loosely drawn doodle of an anatomical heart. Calliope swore she could almost feel every blood vessel in her face expanding, a beet-red flush falling over her face as she scrambled to close the book. Emmrich moved to hold the book far out of her reach, a devious glint in his eye as he drawled “Calliope Volkarin, eh?”
The Seventh time Emmrich said her name it was to give a gift.
“My dear, please sit still or else I shan’t be able to give this gift properly.” Emmrich teased. Of course, he’d give her the present no matter what. But after finally acquiring a fitting token of his affection, his love, he wanted to give it to Rook exactly as he imagined.
Stepping behind her perched on his desk, he opened the soft bag that contained her gift, he peered around to ensure her eyes were tightly shut, letting out an exhale of satisfaction Emmrich moved Rook’s hair to the side, holding it tightly in his hands he twisted her hair up and out of the way, a wry smile on his lips as he pulled lightly on the bundle. Rook let out a gentle hiss as heat pooled in between her legs. “If you could please hold your hair?”
Satisfied, Emmrich proceeded to undo the clasp of the necklace, threading it around Rook’s neck, his fingers ghosting over her skin as he did so. After it was joined, Emmrich’s fingers lightly traced the chain over her clavicle, placing tender kisses on the back of Rook’s neck. Rook felt the cool weight of the necklace on her sternum, reaching up to feel the pendant, gasping as she raised it into her view. Finely detailed skeletal hands grasped a large garnet, it was hard to tell upside down but it almost looked like the stone was vaguely heart-shaped. “Emmrich, this is far too much! I can’t imagine what it must have cost!” Emmrich paused his careful mapping of Rook’s neck with his lips and moved closer to her ear, his light stubble scratching lightly at Rook’s skin.
“I saw this when we were back in Nevarra and I couldn’t resist picturing how it would look around your neck, Calliope.” Added to the ministrations on her neck, he knew the reaction she had to Emmrich saying her real name, how a delicious red painted her cheeks and chest, creating the perfect trail for Emmrich’s fingers to follow. Calliope’s squirms brought herself closer to Emmrich, her back hitting his chest as he gently grasped Calliope’s neck with one hand, his other tracing the long line of her tattoo down towards her soft lower stomach. His cool rings icy against her heat.
“Emmrich” she gasped, breath hitching, reaching for the back of his neck, bringing him closer, and kissing him deeply. Soft moans emanated from the both of them, Calliope broke away inhaling trying to extricate herself from Emmrich’s grasp, but he tugged gently, coaxing her back to her original position. “Calliope, this is about you, my love.”
The eighth time, wasn’t really the eighth time. By then Elgar’nan had been dead for nearly a year. Emmrich and Calliope had returned to the Necropolis, Emmrich to his shaping of young minds, Calliope to the library, her younger self’s sacred sanctuary. On occasion they would jointly lecture on what they discovered during their time fighting against the Evanuris, careful to still keep some secrets. Manfred was flourishing under the tutelage of the Mourn Watch, his curiosity leading to amusing stories over dinner.
On this particular evening, Manfred had delivered a sealed note to Calliope, asking for her to arrive in the Memorial Gardens when the dinner bell tolls.
The flowers in the Memorial Gardens seemed to burst with fragrance as Calliope entered. A bouquet of lilacs stood on the table where Calliope and Emmrich had their first real date when they first started to truly get to know each other. A wisp danced across her vision guiding her past the ledge where a small table was set, taking Calliope back to when they first visited the Memorial Gardens together for the mourning rites, eventually the wisp paused at the steps that led towards the grave covered in snaking Shroud’s Kiss. Calliope thanked the wisp and continued up the steps, and onto the pathway which was littered in a cacophony of flower petals, lilac and yellow beckoning towards the figure at their juncture. Emmrich closed the gap, eager to reach his beloved. “Thank you for coming my darling, I admit it is poor manners on my part for such short notice,” he said entwining his hands with Calliope’s. “Emmrich this is quite the surprise, what’s the occasion?”
“Well my love, I -.” Emmrich started, clearing his throat. “Calliope Ingellvar, my dearest Rook. Would you be so mad as to agree to a lifetime with a besotted fool of a professor, and do me the honour of becoming Calliope Volkarin?”
And that was probably the most significant time Emmrich said Calliope’s name.
#dragon age fic#dragon age: the veilguard#datv#da:tv#emmrich volkarin#emmrich#emmrich x rook#female rook#mourn watch rook#oc: calliope#my fic#post fic then runs away into the night#this is fluffy i promise#this has like no angst who even am i#i debated extending the slightly spicy scene
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Sebek Angst
trigger Warning *technically major character death?* Yuu has already passed and this is following sebek's Journey of mourning his love
Indented areas are flashbacks
The sounds of soft clicking fill Sebek's study while he worked. Writing had become the crocodile's escape once he was done with his shifts guarding his lord, Malleus. For a while, the loss of his beloved, Yuu, had rendered him a husk. A husk who refused anything out of his routine.
Wake up. Eat. Guard. Eat again. Journal. Sleep. Repeat. He did that for his whole life. But it felt so much more hollow now. Books full of his grief filled his shelves. The rows above are full of stories you two shared. So many are full of his love and admiration.
One such book laid open on his desk. Between the furious bursts of typing, he would reread parts of the journal. Relive that moment so he could write it once again. To now allow the world to know his love for you. A part of him wished the stories would go back to you. So you can hear his love once again.
laughter filled the broken-down dorm as the first year's all spoke over their notes and food. times where the group just got to be school kids. Not fighting overblots or some crazed person or a ghost bride. They were just allowed to be themselves.
Sebek swore only Yuu could foster this environment. It had been almost a year of their constant blood sweat and tears to make this place habitable. Hell, Even other students enjoyed spending their time here, with or without the prefect.
Slowly, as the night went on, the students began to go and do their own things. Some go to bed, and others just retire to their rooms to wind down. However, Sebek stood in the kitchen with the prefect. It had become a routine for the pair to clean up together. light chatter filled the air as the boy was handed wet dishware to dry off.
“Human. I've noticed you've read most of the books in your possession. We shall go together to select more. Do you need any other stationery?”
“I would love to go on a date with you, Sebek.”
He froze at the way you laughed. Was his intention that obvious?
A soft smile sat on his lips as he relived the beginning of your relationship. Human.. oh how that word cuts him deep now. humans had such short life spans, even to the half fae. You had passed well into your 80s. And from what Lilia had explained, that was a long healthy life for a human.
He had kept about 70 years worth of writings about you. Every date you had, he would write in detail, every milestone would have a chapter. All of the love letters you had both sent. He kept all of it. Every memory he had of you.
Devoted. That's all the boy had ever been to you or Malleus. If he could live, eat and breathe you. He would.
But now, in the nights, he lives his life glued to his computer. Giving you another life. Giving you both a new live story. One in the world you would tell him about. One where magic didn't exist. One where he was human too.
A world where you could live and die together. Neither suffering for centuries begging for the other.
The day you both graduated was one sebek could never forget. You looked absolutely glowing, proud to have kept up in a world that felt like it was against you. And yet, he was the one who screamed your praise the whole way.
Once the ceremony was over, Sebek couldn't stop himself from running to you. It was like you were magnetic.
“Yuu! We did it!”
He scooped up his partner in his arms as he spun them around. Words couldn't describe the pride and joy he felt over this. After all. He had an important question he had been sitting on since they got together.
“Yuu! Now that we have graduated. Will you come live with me in Briar Valley?”
He looked back to his bed. Your favorite blanket sat folded beside his pillow. Malleus had enchanted it many years ago to never endure wear and tear. A few years later, sebek had enchanted it to forever smell like you when he had to leave for a trip.
For a while he had cursed himself for that. The smell would make him cry himself to sleep. Begging the stars to let you return to his arms. But now? He finds great comfort in the blanket. After all, It was the first present when you had agreed to live with him.
His eyes drifted down to the black metal around his finger. It was like a traditional fae wedding ring. One of his homeland. And your matching ring sat on a chain around his neck. As close to his heart as it can get. After a few seconds of looking at his ring, he took the book from his desk to bring back to his shelf. he only took another in it's place. The one labeled “Wedding”.
The book was full, page to page, about the events of your wedding and honeymoon. About your silly misadventures and how lucky he was to be the one to be by your side through it all.
The wedding wasn't huge, but Sebek had paid special attention to inviting those close to you. The found family you had made in your time in this world. His family also joined. His siblings teasing the boy relentlessly for his nerves.
The ceremony was held in a large meadow full of flowers and fireflies. Thorns grew over arched metal that had been set long before their time. Their guests lined the isle while he stood by the officiant, clad in a dark black suit with accents of gold. His hair wasn't gelled back for once. Instead, he allowed the fluffy green hair to rest naturally, the way his dear partner loved so much.
Sebek couldn't help but fiddle with the hem of his leather gloves. Once he heard the music began to fill the wind, he took them off. It was time to see his beautiful spouse.
“You looked radiant as always, my heart.” His voice was soft as his fingers brushed over the picture of them having their first dance together. Tears burned his eyes as he held the book close. What he would give to truly be back in those moments. One day, he will be back with his love. Until then. He will continue to give them a new life through these books.
A/n!
This has been eating at me for a week. Hopefully yall enjoy!!
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