#i see fairs and poors in their future

[oceanboy7000]

thoughts and prayers for my chorus chat, they suddenly forgot how to read and sing and count a beat

[batsplat]

Jerez 2006

[It] was certainly within the four walls of that gym, between rep after rep on different muscle groups, that the 'LorenShow' was born. There was a time when only Rossi used to put on a show, but even that has become a rare event. 'Now he only does it on certain occasions,' says Jorge. 'The World Championship was losing a bit of sparkle. Other riders were trying things but they weren't funny, especially in 125cc. There was a time when Melandri tried to imitate Rossi but he never managed to make it as funny.' Jorge had been thinking for a long time about how he could offer his fans something extra after a win. A lot of people saw him as too serious, but he wanted to show that he cared about them, that he enjoyed what he did and that he was affable and good humoured, as well as imaginative. He needed an ingenious plan because he had a clear objective: to celebrate the World Championship title in style. 'We wanted to do it in style, go mad,' recalls Dani Palau. That seemed a long way off, back in the summer of 2006, but once the crises of Turkey, Shanghai and Le Mans were behind him the dream of beating Andrea Dovizioso was alive again.

Strictly speaking, the first episode of the 'LorenShow' was at the Spanish GP in 2006. It was his first victory in the 250cc class and Jorge got off his bike, took off his helmet and started shouting at the fans. 'It was pretty spectacular and it was the first time we used the word "LorenShow",' he recalls. 'Palau and I used to put together a ten-page magazine of our own after each Grand Prix and on the front cover of that particular edition we put a photo of my celebrations and the headline [in English] "Welcome to the LorenShow!" That was awesome, really different. I have always been creative and I fancied doing something special after I won, so I decided to give it a try!' The design of the magazine, by the way, was similar to GQ. 'Well, not similar exactly. We kind of copied it! We were worried about getting into trouble for copying it but I hope they don't hit us with a lawsuit now ... it was only for us!' he laughs.

March 2007

After his victory at Losail Jorge pretended to skip like a boxer, as he'd done for so many hours in the gym with Marcos. It was a spontaneous, intuitive celebration and an early turning point for his season. After such a morale-boosting performance during and after the race, why not celebrate all his victories from now on? 'In Qatar I did the skipping-rope thing but I never thought that in the future I'd be using props to celebrate my victories!' The preparation that went into each episode of 'LorenShow' was a simple but elaborate process. Generally the original idea would come from Jorge and, often with the help of his computer, Palau would fill in the details. It became something of a team effort at Motorsport48, where almost everybody began to join in the fun. Everybody except the boss: Dani Amatriain kept his distance. He didn't like or dislike the celebrations but he preferred to leave them to Jorge as a bit of innocent fun. Out of the blue came another idea, this time from Marcos. Once again, it was an idea born in the gym. 'You are a warrior. You have to reclaim the championship, right? But what kind of a conqueror doesn't have a flag?' Jorge's eyes began to twinkle. 'It has to be something really visual,' Jorge told Palau, taking on the idea. 'Imagine that in each race I stick a flag into the ground, as if I have conquered that land. Like Christopher Columbus when he arrived in America!' The design process was short, with Jorge's X-fuera logo the obvious choice, set on a black background - the colour used by pirates. And written in English, so that it would be understood all over the world, not just in Spain, would be those now famous words: 'Lorenzo's Land'.

The day of its first unfurling soon arrived. It was the Spanish Grand Prix at Jerez, known as 'The Cathedral' by local fans. Dani Palau headed for partisan territory - the section of track that features the 'Angel Nieto' and 'Peluqui' corners, where he would meet his friend if he won the race. 'I had goosebumps. You should have heard the noise from the crowd when Jorge stopped!' he recalls. There were 140,000 people packed into the grandstands at Jerez that day and they had been treated to an outstanding 250cc race: 'la carrera de los cuarenta y dos adelantamientos' ['the race with forty two overtakes']. Jorge Lorenzo savoured the moment. As he had done in 2006, he removed his helmet, got off his bike and punched the air to celebrate his second victory at Jerez. Then the flag appeared by his side. He took it and drove it deep into the gravel. Jerez had been conquered, the first circuit to be claimed as 'Lorenzo's Land'. A few weeks later he won again, in China, and again he planted the flag. However, unlike Jerez, this victory was his first in Shanghai. Nobody was going to stop him now.

"Now what's happening with Lorenzo? Oh, he's going to plant the flag, I think. Here we go! Or he's going to throw the flag. He's going to do something, but, eh... All the script we have in front of us, all the timings, goes out of the window when Lorenzo wins a 250cc race... so you can just, rustle up your papers, any scripts you've got, what's coming up next, disappears, because he delays everything. There we are. Plants the flag..."

Le Mans 2007

Lorenzo, who designs his own logos and comes up with fun things like the pirate flag he sticks in the sand at the circuit where he wins to "announce to everyone" that he has conquered "that land" , says that preparing for these celebrations is just another way of coping with the hard training he does and, above all, having the best time possible. "Looking for ideas for the parties I have at the circuits encourages me to win ," he said yesterday after his excellent victory over Dovizioso.

The Mallorcan, who did not hesitate to admit his mistake on a line and apologize to Dovi for the push he had given him ( "I'm very sorry, I went out too wide on a curve, I wanted to regain verticality too soon, get back on the right line and I crashed into him" ), yesterday came up with nothing better than to dress up his soulmate, Dani Palau, as Jorge Lorenzo, with whom he shares the entertainment of festive designs and games. Palau appeared on the lap of glory and tried to get his two-and-a-half-litre Aprilia and, as they had agreed, Lorenzo told him to go away, that the bike was his and that he was the owner of the winning machine. "We wanted to make a joke, implying that the double, which was him, Dani, represented the Lorenzo who had fallen on Friday and that the real one, that is, myself, was the one who had won the race."

Mugello 2007

Jorge was coming up with more ideas for celebrations than he could use, and that was probably a good thing because some of them would have got him into more trouble than they were worth. Like the one that involved him wearing an Andrea Dovizioso mask. 'We've still got the mask but Andrea would have had to do something really bad to me to warrant getting it out ... though he'd better ‘watch it!' smiles Jorge. Another one that failed to get past the ideas stage was for Valencia, the final race of 2007. Jorge had already claimed the title and, after being criticised all year for using the 'Lorenzo's Land' flag instead of the Spanish one, planned to go completely over the top, using not only the Spanish flag but dressing up' as a bullfighter. Maybe it was a good thing he only managed seventh. The celebrations he did get to use became ever more elaborate and meticulously planned. He would scour the circuit for the best comer, with the best camera angle and the best view for the fans. Jorge had decided that each celebration should have something to do with the country he was in, and in Italy a friend, Jordi Ohva, who worked for Dorna [the commercial and television rights holders for MotoGP] gave him an idea. 'In Italy they've nicknamed you "Spaniard". The commentator on Italian television has started calling you that.''"Spaniard"? Why?''Because you are like a gladiator and that's what they call the main character played by Russell Crowe in the movie Gladiator.' Maximus Decimus Meridius was a Roman general born in Merida, Spain. He lived in the second century and since this was the second year of domination by a Spaniard in the 250cc class then what better way for Lorenzo to celebrate victory in the Italian GP than by dressing up as his namesake? 'In fact, the idea of doing something historical came after watching 300 with Marcos,' explains Jorge, 'We watched the film again with Palau, the three of us talked about it and we decided we wanted to do something related to the Battle of Thermopylae. It was while we were looking for a King Leonidas suit that we came across a Gladiator outfit. That coincided with me finding out what [Italian television commentator] Guido Meda was calling me.' The wheels were quickly put in motion. like any good media relations manager, Pere Gurt sourced an exact replica of the costume worn by Russell Crowe in the film, which was owned by an agency in Madrid. It cost 600 euros a week to rent and the sword was extra. It was kept in a corner of the garage at Mugello, where Dani Palau devoutly guarded it from the inquisitive eyes of journalists who were already wondering what Lorenzo had up his sleeve if he won this one. On race day Palau headed for the comer where they'd agreed to meet if a miracle should happen. Jorge was starting from 20th on the grid, but he still had his sights set on victory. Everybody knows what happened next. On the big screens around the circuit, Palau watched his friend slide into the gravel after colliding with Bautista. He jumped onto his scooter and raced to fetch him, sword, breastplate, helmet, 'Lorenzo's Land' flag and all. The Italian fans spotted the props and, despite Jorge's popularity there, Dani could hear them laughing and shouting insults. The mediocre can be unforgiving when a winner falls from his perch. 'The preparations were perfect, but unfortunately the race wasn't!'

Catalunya 2007

You have to be very confident in your abilities to appear on the starting grid, having previously asked two friends to dress like you, to wait for you at a strategic point during the lap of honour and to take out some guitars so you can emulate your favourite band in front of 112,600 spectators. That was how Jorge Lorenzo celebrated his fifth victory of the season at Montmeló, giving a concert on the track and another one off it, microphone in hand, as a tribute to the Red Hot Chili Peppers and to make up for his fall at Mugello a week ago. This time, the Mallorcan needed two stunt doubles at his side for his performance, and those who dressed as him were Dani Palau, his webmaster and the same one he used at Le Mans, and Ricard Cardús, a CEV driver and Carlos' nephew.

Looking back on his performance, it could be said that the most critical moment was the start, when Thomas Luthi had taken the lead on the first corner. 'Por Fuera' did not back down, he lived up to his nickname and made an epic outside turn. That was the only thing that really cost him, or so it seemed from the sidelines, because he later said that it had been a difficult race. Maybe he said that because he still had in mind the blunder in Italy, that fall on the last corner when Álvaro Bautista overtook him. Whatever the reason, he was exultant and at the end of the podium ceremony he dared to take the speaker's microphone to address the public. "Did you enjoy the show?" he asked from the top of the podium. And he continued: "I know that some of you liked me and others didn't, but I don't care. You are Spanish like me and I love you! Thank you."

The trio completed a recce of Montmelo on Thursday and Friday and performed a rehearsal at the corner of choice, in front of the stadium section. I told them, "When we're playing here, I want you to jump around like the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Go on YouTube, have a look at the videos and learn the dance moves," ' recalls Jorge. 'But the bastards ignored me!' For one magic moment Jorge, Dani and Ricky were no longer Lorenzo, Palau and Cardus. They weren't even three Lorenzos, dancing and singing like maniacs in front of 100,000 people. They were Anthony Kiedis, Flea and John Frusciante. Only Chad Smith was missing on drums, otherwise they would have been the real Chilis. 'I wanted there to be four of us, like the real Chilis, and I was going to ask Ricky's older brother Jordi to join in but there weren't any more leathers in my size. Also, getting a drum kit onto the track would have been a nightmare!'

Donington, Assen, Sachsenring 2007

After Catalunya came the British GP and before travelling there they went to dinner with a racing friend, Xavi Ledesma - the owner of the Fortuna Team hospitality unit and one of Jorge's closest friends in 2005, as well as being the organiser of the Copa Aprilia when he first started racing Xavi told them that the tradition in England was to drink tea in the afternoon. No sooner said than done. They went out and bought a tea tray, complete with teapot, cups and spoons. Palau planned to sit at a table at the Melbourne Loop, dressed as a waiter in a tuxedo and crash helmet. All Jorge had to do was turn up, rest his feet and have a drink. Oh, and win the race. Unfortunately, the final and most crucial part of the plan started to go wrong in the warm-up because, as is well known, rain is as traditional at Donington as tea. Despite the heavy downpour, Jorge produced a great performance - he was having the best wet race of his career. 'Shall I go out or not?' thought Dani halfway through the race. His buddy was running in second place behind Dovizioso. He had to have faith. 'If you have any doubt, something is bound to go wrong,' says Jorge. 'Whenever I have felt sure I would win I have won, but if there has been any kind of doubt I've lost, come second, or something has happened. That is what the brain is like.' And just as Palau made his mind up and went to load up the scooter with props, Jorge hit the deck. That was one cuppa that was hard to swallow. Jorge's next celebration was enjoyed by the Spanish fans, although it was on a Saturday rather than a Sunday. The Dutch are a bit different in everything, even their racing, and since 1949 the TT at Assen has always taken place on a Saturday. Jorge knew exactly what he was going to do if he won. He wanted to copy the thousands of locals by riding a pushbike. They rehearsed their routine at two or three different comers. 'This place is best. How far will you ride the bike? Will you be able to cycle in boots?' Every minute detail was taken care of. 'We'd practised in that area where Valentino sat when he won the MotoGP race, the bit that looks like a target. I was going to leave my Aprilia and the pushbike would be in the middle of the circle. We thought of it before Rossi!' Suddenly, he changed his mind. On his return to the pit garage he realised that there was a stage, all set up right next to the track, because just by the final chicane that leads into the start-finish straight there is a VIP terrace. It was the perfect place - and not only that, there was a television camera directly opposite.

'We could sit down and have a drink,' Jorge told Dani. The fact he'd missed out on his cup of tea at Donington a few days earlier still irked him, so it was all hands on deck. The owners of the terrace had to be consulted and asked for permission. Initially they weren't too keen because there are no fences there and it is easy for people to get out and access pit lane. For that reason, a huge deposit has to be paid to hire the area, which the circuit organisers retain if there are any problems. In the end they realised it was a Lorenzo celebration and they went along with it. This time Jorge backed up his plans with a dominant victory. However, having left his bike propped against the fence before climbing over the tyre wall and on to the terrace, he was swamped by punters taking photographs and the television cameras lost him in the melee. 'On top of that, the bar owner was a complete opportunist and he got a bunch of people to hold up an advertisement! It was a disaster.' Even though not much could be seen on the television, it was clear that Jorge's double had returned and that they'd gone to have a drink together. But why? Jorge was happy to provide the answer in pare ferme. 'After the crash at Donington, somebody [Dovizioso] had suggested I was getting nervous. So I sipped on a herbal tea.' Some time later Dani Palau insisted that the initial idea was to drink a glass of water but, as at Le Mans, Jorge was thinking on his feet and he was eager to hit back at Dovizioso. 'Sometimes that happens to me. I get really good ideas on the spur of the moment. Other times I really have to think things through for them to work out. But sometimes I get a flash of inspiration.'

Jorge finished fourth in Germany but there were no plans for a celebration even if he'd won. He was worried about the joke wearing thin. 'You have to keep people guessing. It is good to have an element of the unexpected. If we did it every time it wouldn't be funny any more. The truth is that I like things to be complete and maybe I would have continued the celebrations race after race but I let them convince me. It was good to have a break.' The summer holidays were approaching and they wanted to leave the fans gagging for more. To be fair, I have to say that I can't always put on a big celebration because I need helpers and Palau didn't come to every race. For the ones outside Europe we had a much smaller group.' There were no celebrations in the Czech Republic either, but this time for a different reason. Nobody at Motorsport48 was in the mood for a party. Dani Amatriain's assistant, Esther Serra, had just lost her brother, Marc. Jorge won but conducted a silent parade of his now obligatory 'Lorenzo's Land' flag in honour of the family. 'The problem with the celebrations is that it gets harder and harder to come up with something original, with meaning, that isn't just plain stupid,' says Jorge. 'Ideas are finite. We had something planned for Portugal but I'd prefer to keep it to myself - I might use it in the future. We also wanted to do something with animals but are they allowed on the track? We planned to get Datil, my mum's dog, a set of made-to-measure leathers but imagine if we brought him out and he had a shit on the track! That'd cause a scene!' Jorge fell about laughing as his imagination took over. 'It's a shame Marcos doesn't come to more races because we could dress him up as Shrek! Ha, ha!'

Misano 2007

From that moment on, Jorge defended his first place, riding alone and maintaining a calm margin over the second, who ended up being the Japanese Aoyama, after first catching his teammate Kallio, who fell next, and then Héctor Barberá, who added his third podium of the year. Lorenzo is now 50 points ahead and celebrated by doing a lap of honour dressed as a Roman gladiator. De Angelis is second after finishing a disappointing fifth in what was his Grand Prix.

Jorge toyed with the idea of wearing his new outfit [the gladiator costume he had been mocked for at Mugello] if he won at the GP of Catalunya but eventually decided that revenge is a dish best served cold and it was better to wait. The season would give him plenty of opportunities to settle the score and the Italian fans would have no choice but to bow down before him like a Roman general. Every great film has unforgettable lines that are often repeated by film buffs. This one from Gladiator suited Jorge down to the ground. My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius . . . commander of the armies of the north . . . general of the Felix Legions . . . loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius . . . father to a murdered son ... husband to a murdered wife ... and I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next. 'What a well-chosen phrase!' Lorenzo must have thought. Italy owed him one and he was going back to collect his dues. It wasn't to be in that first race on Italian soil, but he was determined to get his revenge in the second. He rented the outfit again, waving goodbye to another 600 euros, but this wasn't about the money. This was a question of honour. He didn't know the circuit, because there hadn't been a GP there since 1993, and although he had visited Misano once, when he'd signed for Derbi in 2002, he was only 15 then and not old enough to actually ride. None of that mattered now, because he went out and won. And on top of that, Dovizioso broke down. Jordi Perez and Cheni Martinez raced out onto the track to dress their man. They'd already discussed with Race Direction and the television directors where the best place would be for the celebration in terms of safety and maximum exposure. Jorge didn't want to take the outfit off - not when he stepped on to the podium, or when he sprayed the champagne. He even kept it on for the press conference. He clearly wanted to recoup his investment, but above all he wanted to enjoy the moment. He felt like the king of the world. ' "Now THAT was legendary," Guido Meda told me.' "

Sepang 2007

Dovizioso responded to remain in Lorenzo’s slipstream as the duo were caught by KTM team-mates Hiroshi Aoyama and Mika Kallio, plus Hector Barbera. The five battled until the penultimate lap when Dovizioso’s wafer-thin title hopes were ended as Mika Kallio took him out in an out-braking move. Hiroshi Aoyama inherited the lead and kept it to the flag from Barbera and Lorenzo. As Kallio remounted to finish fourth ahead of Tomas Luthi, Andrea Dovizioso remounted to cross the line eleventh. Meanwhile Jorge Lorenzo was celebrating keeping the 250cc world championship in a boxer’s gold-coloured gown and gloves, and picking up a fake championship belt in parc ferme.

Jorge won his second 250cc World Championship at the Malaysian Grand Prix with one race to spare, to top off an outstanding 2007 season. And what better way to celebrate in style than by looking way back to the very first race of the year in Qatar, when Jorge recovered the 'eye of the tiger'? His antics in 2007 had made him the leading contender for the title of paddock showman left vacant by Valentino Rossi in a season when the Italian had little to celebrate. It's clear by now that Jorge is up for a challenge and a second 250cc World Championship title was enough of an excuse for him to stake his claim, as the leading heavyweight in 'motorshowbusiness'. On this occasion it wasn't actually one of his own ideas, but he made it his own as soon as it left the lips of Marcos Hirsch. Having started the season training like Rocky Balboa and trying to recover the 'eye of the tiger', he took the title in Malaysia (coincidentally a country the famous Italian novelist Emilio Salgari referred to as the 'land of the tigers' ) and there was only one way to celebrate - as the new CHAMPION OF THE WOOOOOORLD! That box in the corner of the garage at Plulhp Island contained a story all of its own. Jorge and Marcos's initial idea was to set up a boxing match between the two of them, in which Jorge would knock Marcos out. The idea was that I had to beat a heavyweight. And boy is he heavy!' laughs Jorge. When I'd dressed as Jorge at Valencia the previous year, the message was that he had grown up,' explains Marcos. 'This time it was a case of demonstrating that he was capable of anything. Even knocking out somebody twice his height and weight, like me!' Another of Jorge's ideas was for Marcos to grow his hair like Don King, the world's most famous boxing promoter. In the end the celebration wasn't exactly as Jorge and Marcos had planned, partly because the Brazilian trainer was unable to make the trip to Malaysia.

The final idea came about after a conversation between Jorge and Marcos after which the 'celebration panel' of Jorge, Dani Palau and Pere Gurt set things in motion. They went on the Internet to download information about the Clint Eastwood film Million Dollar Baby and then researched other famous boxers like Mike Tyson, Evander Holyfield, Oscar De La Eioya and Julio Cesar Chavez. Once they had decided on a look they set about sourcing the outfit. Esther Serra was sent to a fabric shop in Barcelona, which is where they encountered their first setback. They didn't have any gold fabric for the hooded cloak - only black - and if that shop didn't have it, it was difficult to imagine anywhere else that would. But necessity is the mother of invention and somebody suddenly remembered that the covers used to unveil Jorge's Apiilia RSW250 at the start of the season had been gold. Problem solved! Now it was a case of putting the whole outfit together. They'd found a blue cloak in a Barcelona boxing shop, and picked up a gum shield at the same time. There were some fruitless trips to fancy dress shops. It was time to get the family involved... Pere Gurt called his mother, Rosa Casas, and her friend, Carme Armengol. After much protest, which fell on deaf ears, the pair reluctantly accepted the assignment and, as a result, MotoGP ended up with two more avid fans - to the point where they would get up at 5am to watch Jorge race in Australia.

A world championship belt needed to be found at the same time, so the team got in touch with the Spanish Boxing Federation (FEB), who recommended 'Charlie's', a specialist shop in Madrid. Bingo! Not only did they have a belt, they also had a pair of golden gloves. The only problem was that the belt featured the Dutch flag, but Esther wasted no time in having the red, white and blue colours replaced with a logo designed by Dani PalaWeb that read: 'Loren Show II'. In the end Jorge didn't use the gum shield, but there's a little story about that too. When Juan Llansa saw it he said there was no point: 'That is a shit gum shield. You need one made to measure!' Juanito knew what he was talking about - he'd not only seen plenty of riders use them over his 20 years in motorcycle racing, but also his daughter, Zaida Llansa, was the 2001 Kata [a form of martial arts] World Champion. As soon as he landed in Australia he looked on the Internet for a martial arts shop near Phillip Island. He bought the silicone, warmed it in boiling water and made Jorge bite it for a made-to-measure gum shield. Lorenzo still decided not to use it for the celebrations, but Juanito saved it just in case Jorge decided he needed one for MotoGP. 'He never wore one in 125cc and 250cc but I've saved it just in case he really needs to grit his teeth in MotoGP!' Llansa laughed. Everything was prepared as quickly as possible because there wasn't much time. Jorge quickly became impatient: 'Pere, how's the cloak coming along?' 'Don't worry about it.' 'If it's going to be shit just leave it and we'll think of something else.' 'Trust me. I don't doubt your work, so don't doubt mine.' It was almost time to leave and everything was ready. Cheni Martinez picked up the outfit and went to meet Jorge at the Hotel Barcelo-Sants gym in Barcelona for a dress rehearsal. He had to try everything on before leaving for Melbourne. In the car on the way to the airport Jorge received a call. It was Pere. 'How is it?' 'Pffff. It's not that bad.' Pere Gurt hung up with a smile. 'We've done it,' he thought.

The box remained unopened in Australia, of course, but in Malaysia the surprise was unleashed. The hardest-hitting World Champion in racing was about to be crowned and the character of Rocky Balboa represented the strength he'd displayed to overcome his own limitations and fears. Jorge Lorenzo had not only clinched his second world title, he'd proved to himself and to the world that he could do anything, as a rider and as a person. And then he and the clan treated the public to their most memorable celebration yet. His friends, headed by Juanito Llansa, waited for him with the boxer's outfit that Lorenzo wanted to wear to mirror his battling performances on the track that season — the cloak, gloves and belt of a World Champion, made out of gold fabric and with a logo on the back, hand sewn by Pere Gurt's mother and her neighbour. It simply read: Loren Show II. World Champion 2007. The 'Lorenzo's Land' flag had fluttered at seven different circuits during the year, but this time it was the Spanish flag that an emotional Lorenzo drove into Malaysian soil, in the final turn of the Sepang International Circuit. The whole act had been Jorge's tribute to 'the eye of the tiger', the winning attitude of Rocky Balboa that he'd adopted as his own. All the knock-out blows to his rivals during the season had given him just cause for celebration. Celebrations are often forgotten the following day, as soon as the outfits and props have been returned, but not this time. The World Championship gown and gloves will always remain part of Jorge's life.. 'One day I returned home to find that my mother had prepared a surprise. She had redecorated my bedroom and there it was, my gold outfit, hung on the wall, looking magical.' Some people think Jorge Lorenzo is simply copying Valentino Rossi, the originator of post-race victory celebrations, in order to enhance his own image. Others feel that perhaps he takes things too far, or they may view the Lorenzo antics rather more favourably. Jorge will continue to hope they're accepted for what they are: harmless, innocent fun but always with a moral to the 'story'. There's no doubt, though, that he will have something to say if other riders start copying him...

Jorge Lorenzo and 250cc celebrations

Lorenzo is authentic, reject imitations (2007); Shanghai race commentary (2007); A recital by Jorge Lorenzo to forget about Mugello (2007); Lorenzo 'Gladiator' conquers Misano and caresses the title (2007); Sepang MotoGP: Jorge Lorenzo is 2007 250cc GP champion, Hiroshi Aoyama wins race (2007); Jorge Lorenzo: My Story So Far (2010)

[alexthetrashyracoon]

Simon wants to marry you.

This fact was as clear as rain on his mind. You were the love of his life, he was ready to settle down with you and grow old.

So Simon prepared everything for that special day, it was your fourth year anniversary and Simon wants to ask you the biggest question someone could ask and he hoped, maybe even prayed despite not believing in any higher deity, that you would say 'yes' to his proposal.

He has planned out the whole day, from the moment you woke to the moment you would close your eyes for the night again, everything was supposed to be perfect.

Simon brings you breakfast in bed, watching your smile brighten when you see the freshly pressed orange juice and the fresh buns, still warm from the bakery. "Happy Anniversary." He whispers before slipping back into bed behind you, pulling you between his legs and stealing some of the freshly cut Mango from your plate.

When breakfast is over, you two made a mess out of each other while trying to feed each other, he scoops you up and carries you into the bathroom, telling you to get ready and that he has a lot of plans for today which causes you to become perceptive. Immediately starting to question him about his plans, but he's still a trained soldier, he withstands your flow of questions.

Another plan of Simon for today was bringing you to a fair, the same one you two met four years ago.

Here he wanted to ask you to marry him, on top of the Ferris wheel where you two had been stuck together four years ago due to a technical issue with the electronic.

But after spending a few hours walking the fair ground, having to walk back to his car once to bring Lord Otto from Otterson, the plush Otter he won you at one of the stupid and usually very rigged fair games, to safety and out of the way. You make it to the Ferris wheel and Simon's face fell.

"Out of order..." He breathes and runs a hand through his short blonde hair, staring up at the still standing wheel and the dangling cable cars.

"Damn." You curse softly next to him and scratch your neck. "Well, maybe we can ride it another day, mhm?"

"Yeah, maybe. Well, we can't change anything now." He chuckles and squeezes the velvety box in his back pocket. Keeping it safe until you two would reach the next destination.

The small restaurant by the corner where you two lived was filled with loud voice, happy laughter, children running around, not that Simon minded, he knew you were a very outgoing person and enjoyed the social interactions from such evenings.

Simon had reserved a table a few weeks ago and the waiter brings you and him over, Simon shushing the poor man who just wants to help you sit.

He is your boyfriend, bloody hell, he can do something so simple as helping you get seated.

"I know it is our anniversary, Simon," You chuckle as you put down the glass of wine Simon has ordered for you and him, "But something feels different. I just don't know what. Special..."

"Four years is just a long time, love. Maybe your brain finally catches up with... wha-?" Simon wants to be cheesy with you before asking you the question of all questions when suddenly his feet feel wet and he looks down, seeing water come from the kitchen.

His second attempt of asking for your hand has been sabotaged by a broken water pipe.

Simon curses internally as he carries you back outside, not wanting to get your feet wet and cause you catching some flu.

Well, there is only the romantic walk through the nearby park which is empty around this time of the night, so you two can walk around the pond and watch the fireflies and swans before he can go down on one knee and finally ask.

But before he even get you through the sturdy iron gates that allowed entrance to the park, his phone rang, Prices' number on the screen and everything in Simon screams to ignore his Captain for the sake of your relationship and your future.

He apologizes and takes the call, listening to Price explaining that they've got information about a certain Russian Terrorist planning an attack and that they had to meet within the next hour.

"It's fine." You reassure him when he brings you back to your shared apartment, squeezing his hand with a gentle smile on your lips. "I had a lot of fun today with at my side. And saving the world is much more important. We can celebrate another time, Si."

"You're too forgiving." Simon replies and presses his chapped lips against your forehead. "But it's not fine. I had the whole day planned out. And the universe seems against me at all, bloody hell. All I wanted to do tonight was asking you to marry me. And everything I've tried blew. The Ferris Wheel, the restaurant, even the walk..."

You cut him off before he can talk himself into a frenzy by wrapping your arms around his neck, having to stand on your tiptoes and planting your lips on his.

"Yes." You grin when you pull back. "Yes, I will marry you, Simon Riley. I will marry you."

Maybe he should have simply asked you this morning during breakfast, might have saved him from getting another grey hair on his head. But sometimes the simple answer is hidden behind the complicated ideas.

[bunny-jpeg]

the dnf club (vol. 2)

franco colapinto

tags: smut/pwp, brazil gp '24, rough sex, frustration, rough sex, modified doggy style, semi-public/closet sex, quiet sex

a/n: this is a little series of one shot fics because these poor guys all got dnfs at the brazil gp! this one in particular was inspired by an ask i got in my inbox after the gp! so thank you lovely anon! <3

carlos edition // alex edition // lance edition // nico edition

franco knew that his seat was still hanging in the balance. it felt like formula one was going through drivers faster than anything. one wrong move and they were out, replaced with another hopeful, who may or may not yield the same results.

it left the argentinian in a state of anxiety. after talks with the team you came over to him with a frown on your face. you weren't upset that he had to sit out of the race. but rather upset that he was upset. and when you collided into him and wrapped your arms around him tightly.

he simply held onto you a little tighter.

you ended up in the supply closet close to the williams garage. you ended up up against a wall of shelves with your skirt pushed up to expose the roundness of your ass.

"franco." you swallowed as you heard the unzip of his uniform. you couldn't see him, but you could only imagine the look on his face. you knew he was riled up, beyond upset at his weekend.

you believed he was a future champion, a hopefully for 2025. you knew he beat himself up a little more than more established drivers. he was still a small fish in a big pond. any dnfs could hinder a promise of a career.

"please." he said, "let me." his hand grazed the roundness of your ass before he took your panties and pulled them down to your ankles, "nothing more i need right now than you, my love." he then kissed the center of your clothed back.

you were in a williams t-shirt tucked into your skirt, not to mention the bracelet you made from plastic beads that spelled out his name. you looked like a real fan girl, and in fairness, you were franco's number one fan. (on top of being his girlfriend).

he admired your backside, as much as he would've loved to get you full undressed and admire your naked beauty. you two had to be quick. he could admire you when you got back to the hotel room.

"you're so beautiful." he admired as he ran a hand up the side of your thigh, "i want you so badly. i always want you." he shuddered with want as he sank his cock into you with heated affection. fucking with his driver's suit still on was a bit of a challenge as his fireproofs stuck to his skin as he got hotter.

you replied, "you always have me, franco." you quickly covered your mouth with your hand as to not be too loud. you didn't want the team to find your boyfriend's cock inside of you.

franco felt better when he started to move against you. with the thump of his chest as he battered his cock against your sweet core. he pressed his cheek up against your back as he moved your foot up against a lower shelf to get the best angle of your sticky sweet cunt. he panted heavily against your clothed back as he continued to rut against you.

"you'll win it next time, my love." you said with a bit of strain in your voice as he moved up against you. you felt a swirl of hear in your head as he moved up against you. you loved the feeling and the risk of being caught only added a rush to your system.

he kissed your back before he rested his cheek against your once more, he had you positioned in a way that allowed him to sink his cock into the deepest parts of you. he could feel your racing heartbeat against his back and it made his cock twitch. he needed you, he wanted you, every way he could have you. he was still wound up from the dnf, but being with you alleviated a bit of the emotional pain.

how could he upset when he had his lovely girlfriend's pussy to fuck?

you were trying to hold onto the shelves for some sort of leverage, you felt the hammering in your chest as the sounds of sex filled the small space. you felt heated, your hair stuck to places you didn't want it to. you covered your mouth once more to keep from being too loud. the waves of heat across your skin as the two of you fucked like rabbits in a supply closet.

you squeaked a little when you heard people walking by. their voiced muffled by the door, and you squeezed your eyes shut to keep yourself quiet. franco only fucked you harder, bouncing you up against his cock with a heated want. you felt the pleasure flood your brain and when the people on the other side of the door were further away, a stray moan left your lips.

franco groaned a little bit against your back, "when we get back to the hotel room." he whispered, "i want you screaming with how good i make you feel." and that only made you wetter.

you nodded and held onto the metal shelves a little tighter. you could feel something made of plastic dig into your skin. but there was little time to worry about that. franco decorated your neck with kisses, when his lips grazed the back of your neck you felt your nipples grow hard, they rubbed up against your bra which only fueled your pleasure.

while this wasn't the ideal place to fuck, it was something exciting. which only spurred you both on. franco's pace became brutal as he whispered in your ear, "all mine." he said, "you know that. no one else would let me take out all the anger out on them. all my frustration. that's why you're my number one. i love you more than anything." he wrapped his arms around your middle and bounced you onto his cock, "only you."

a few things clattered around on the shelves and you let out a moan, you almost made you lip bleed as you bit down on it as to not be painfully loud. even though there was more commotion outside, you didn't want to draw attention to your sexual escapade in the supply closet.

you prayed that no one needed an extra rag or a spare wrench while franco's cock was buried into you. at least your lover had the decency to lock the door. allowing a bit more privacy. regardless of it all, you felt the immense pleasure in your core. you felt the heat between you two.

your noises were muffled, and your breathing got heavier. franco's pace staggered and the two of you were rutting against one another with a frantic need for climax. you could find soft intimacy somewhere where curious eyes won't listen in.

his strong arms around you as he thrusted up into you made you feel protected. you felt the swim of pleasure in your core as the two of you continued to move against one another. it was a heated euphoria that soon found its climax.

you clamped a hand over your mouth once more and squeezed your eyes shut, your entire body tensed and you almost lost your balance as you came around his cock. franco could make out you saying his name which only encouraged him to keep fucking you.

his cock was slick with your wetness, sticky to the touch as it dripped down to the base of his cock. he knew the front of his driver's suit was a mess. he'd need to change before he got shoved in front of the press. with a few more heavy strokes he finished inside of you. his jaw tense as he tried to keep himself quiet from the gut punch of pleasure.

you rested further against the shelves and franco against your back. it wasn't long before he pulled out and tucked himself back into his suit. with your panties back on and your skirt straightened out. you turned to your lover and kissed him deeply on the lips.

"all better?" you asked softly.

he held you by the hips, his smiled bright as he said, "of course, you make everything better, my love." then kissed you once more. the frustration had melted off of his skin. he felt almost renewed, that the next race would be better.

you two kissed a little more before you both slinked out of the closet, thankful not to be caught. however franco would overhear later on about the smell in the supply closet. he grinned at the rim of his water bottle as he heard, "yeah, it smells like sex in that." <3

[moonstruckme]

congrats on 7k!! I humbly request ⁶⁾ scraped knees with remus and shy!reader. I loooove a good hurt/comfort fic!!

Same here babe!

cw: mention of blood

Remus Lupin x shy!reader ♡ 503 words

Remus’ eyes catch on your knees the second he opens the door. In fairness, red is the most eye-catching color. 

“Sweetheart.” He feels like the air has been knocked out of him. “What happened to you?” 

“It’s fine,” you say quickly, though your voice is small and you’re chewing your lips so badly Remus worries they might bleed soon too. 

“It’s not fine, you’re bleeding. Come here, come inside.” He ushers you in almost against your will. The way your expression twinges when you walk on your poor battered legs doesn’t escape his notice, but you go where he tells you. 

“I’m sorry, I only meant to bring you back your book.” You fish in your bag, holding it up for him to see. “I just, a biker startled me when I was crossing the street, and I fell…” 

“Oh, dovey,” Remus coos. You look embarrassed. He accepts the book, setting it down on the table before taking you gently by the elbow to lead you down the hall. “You’ve got nothing to be sorry for. I’m sorry that git ran into you.” 

Your shoulders come up. “It wasn’t really his fault…”

Remus guarantees it was. Even if it wasn’t, he doesn’t care.

“Sit here, darling.” He pats the counter by the sink. 

He can tell the pet names are flustering you, but Remus almost can’t help himself. He just feels for you so terribly, it’s as though all his affection is rising to the surface and he has no control over where it chooses to pour out. Your fault for coming here all sad and injured. You’ve done him in. 

“I don’t mean to keep you,” you say, voice getting smaller as he pulls supplies and bandages from a drawer. 

“You’re not. You’re never keeping me, I’m always happy to see you. Well,” he amends, “in the future, I’d prefer to see you whole and unharmed, but even so I’ll take what I can get.” He smiles up at you as he crouches in front of your knees. When you return it tentatively, it warms his whole chest. 

He’s gentle as he cleans you up, staying as far from the mess of your knees as he can for the time being and instead taking care of the blood trailing down your shins. You watch him silently, that poor lip of yours still trapped between your teeth. Remus decides that he has to pick his battles. 

“Sorry, this might sting.” You tense despite his warning, taking a quiet breath in through your nose. Remus has the urge to kiss you all over. “I know, sweetheart. I’m sorry.” 

“Sorry,” you giggle wetly. You look terribly shy, your shoulders nearly up to your ears. “I don’t know why I got so surprised.” 

“You’re pretty torn open,” he says. “I’m sure it hurts.” 

“It’s not so bad.” 

Remus tsks, indulging himself in a kiss to the unhurt skin beside your knee. “Poor love,” he murmurs to himself. 

You hide your face in your hands.

[heartfullofleeches]

Damsel Yan with a Butler Darling loyal to some other royal- Playing the part of a princess is fun, but the same can't exactly be said about all the reasonability that comes with it. If only being a fair maiden caught the attention of brave knights instead of spineless princes after their hand in marriage-

Butler Darling sees right through Damsel's games and tries to warn their smitten prince of the danger. Their master hears none of it and invites Damsel over for dinner. Damsel attends only to break the poor fool's heart, but upon seeing Darling - a gruff, fearless servant looking out for their employer and life long friend.... The "princess" realizes marriage just might actually be on the table.

-

Prince: Damsel, I love you! Marry me!

Damsel: Prince.... It would be an honor to be your bride, but I'm afraid I'm married to our kingdom.

....

Butler Darling, holding a knife to Damsel's throat: Leave this castle immediately, Demon-

....

Damsel: Oh, Prince! If we get married that frightening servant of yours would be mine as well correct?

Prince: I don't see why not....

Damsel: Well what are we waiting for?! Let's get married tonight!

-

Butler Darling: Sir... I must express some concerns I have about your future bride to be. They tend to leave their.... undergarments in front of my door.

Prince: Well, laundry is apart of your duties. She's just being polite by bringing them to you!

[Darling stares down at a crumpled pair of underwear in their hand, lipstick smeared onto the fabric]

Butler Darling: Whatever helps you rest at night.

[latin5mamii]

Backstage -Jude Bellingham

|WARNINGS: cute and fluff |AUTHOR'S NOTE:inspired by remmysthings request (Jude Bellingham xSinger reader) |SUMMARY:You couldn't imagine that the world's best footballer had a little crush on you..

“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?”Jude says to his friends while watching you perform, almost

enchanted by your skill and beauty. You were called to perform in a stadium, where all the celebrities would be there to watch you.

"She's also very good, I mean look at her-" 

"Jude, please stop.Just confess to her already" says his friend, Erling, poor guy, he just wanted to hear some good music but unfortunately he happened to be sitting next to Jude.

"How about next time you make a sign that says 'Y/N I love you'?" Trent says jokingly, lightly slapping Jude's cheek.

Before Jude could reply, the crowd erupted into applause as your performance came to an end. With a final bow and a gracious smile, you left the stage to the thunderous applause of thousands.

“We have to go to the fucking backstage and you have to congratulate, and maybe, even exchange numbers”Trent’s idea was approved by Erling too,so he took Jude by the hand, just like a baby, and they drag him to the backstage to talk to you.

With every step that brought them closer to backstage, Jude almost wanted to go back.

"Maybe it's not a good idea, I don't even know what to say to her"

"Flirt with her a little, be a gentleman and see that it's done. Have you ever been rejected?"

"No, is this even a question?"

"So what are you worried about?"

"Maybe he has traumas," Erling says, laughing along with Trent.

But now it was too late to go back out, there you were, talking to the festival organizer, taking compliments and saying goodbye.

As soon as you finish talking to her you lock eyes with Jude and smile at him, you literally see him being pushed towards you by his friends and he holds out his hand for you to shake it.

Jude took a deep breath and approached you tentatively. When you turned and caught his eye, your smile widened, and Jude felt a surge of determination.

"Hi," Jude greeted, his voice slightly hoarse from nerves but filled with sincerity. "I just wanted to say... that was an incredible performance. Really, really amazing."

You looked pleasantly surprised by his approach, a blush creeping onto your cheeks at his compliment. "Thank you so much," you replied warmly. "I'm glad you enjoyed it."

"I'm Jude," he introduced himself, extending his hand towards you.

"I'm Y/N," you said with a smile, shaking his hand gently. "It's nice to meet you, Jude."

Jude grinned, feeling a rush of adrenaline as he stood there talking to you. His nervousness melted away as he engaged in light-hearted banter, sharing goofy stories and laughing together about festival mishaps.

"So, Y/N," Jude began with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, "do you always make such amazing music, or are we just lucky tonight?"

You couldn't help but laugh at his playful charm. "I guess you're just lucky tonight," you teased, enjoying the playful banter.

As the conversation continued, Jude found himself genuinely enjoying your company. He felt at ease, making silly jokes and sharing lighthearted moments with you. Trent and Erling watched from a distance, grinning proudly at their friend's newfound confidence.

"Well, Y/N, I don't want to keep you from celebrating," Jude eventually said with a mock-serious expression. "But maybe we could continue this conversation over... I don't know, a dance-off?"

You laughed, shaking your head in amusement. "As tempting as that sounds, I think I'll pass on the dance-off for now," you replied with a playful wink.

"Fair enough," Jude conceded with a grin. "But how about we exchange numbers instead? You know, for... future dance-offs."

You nodded, unable to suppress a smile at his infectious energy. "Sure, I'd like that," you agreed, exchanging numbers with Jude amidst playful banter.

He introduced you to his friends and then you said goodbye. Watching them going out you couldn’t help but smile,I mean, he’s hot, and you know it.

“Good job,mate!But don’t forget the sign next time,alright?”

“Shut up you jealous little shit”

[jaal-ama-daravv]

dissecting the emmrich romance scene (lich path)

dissecting the graveyard scene dissecting the alternate romance path dissecting the argument scene (lich path) mortal vs lich romance path emmrich x rook cinematic

Emmrich Volkarin - Dissecting the Lich Romance Scene fair warning you're in for an emotional rollercoaster

first, i wanna touch on this from our previous dissection (argument) -

"What if I can't bear that for eternity?" Oh, Emmrich. his entire soul aches over the inevitable future that awaits rook. i think this line is so important for emmrich because 'bear that for eternity" implies Emmrich will either, a) go rogue trying to bring rook back c) live with so much grief over his lost love it changes his soul forever in a dark, yet unknown way. and quite frankly, all of these are incredibly sad, and that just hurts. i thoroughly, full heartedly believe that there is no concievable way that emmrich just 'moves on' and 'accepts' the death of rook as previously stated in the lichdom scene. sry bioware, but youre wrong on that one as if he was 'fine' with it, he wouldn't of had a massive panic attack over rooks death and his grief. COUGH, the eternal flame. i could rant for hours and HOURS about how emmrich in the lich path is absoloutley devastating if rook were to pass on, because he is so compulsively, irrevocably in love with them. and not only is he in love with them, he has the love he has yearned for, for over 20 years. its huge for him which is evident given how both romance paths have him terrfied of how much he loves you.

Additionally, Emmrich grew up poor. This would impact his view on society and love. But more impactfully, it would impact his view on himself. His self-worth. Emmrich likely thinks he doesnt deserve this type of love. Hence the attempt to push Rook away and act over-suave at times.

anyway, to the SCENE -

immediately we are hit with this, to which Emmrich replies stating that he did it not to scare the citizens. what a load of huff. youll see why thats a straight deflective lie soon -

don't you worry handsome man, youre not alone emmrich expressing his fear of losing rook, and/or losing eachother, continues to be a major dynamic between these lovers

oh rooky, im so proud of you for opening up about your feelings. (remember the argument they had prior, it was fort knox up in here)

rook expresses clear fear and gratitude that they were able to escape the fade. I do believe that the line "I was afrad I'd be there forever" is a parrelle to emmrichs lichdom - as they would of spent eternity without eachother. hence why this next line, hurts so much -

the raw emotion, the crack in his voice when he says this line tells you everything you need to know. he is so grateful to have rook back with him. I do believe in this moment that emmrich has a moment of realisation of his love for rook, and just how immensed and attached he is with her. which is why he later vows that nothing will part them ever again, "not in this, nor any other world" (cough, soulmates). idk man, i have a feeling that emmrich would find rook's spirit in the fade (or any other world) if they passed on, and he'd never leave.

key point back to the lichdom decision scene -

man would go full blown rogue, scarlet witch rogue, i see it now.

I also want to touch on the "you're here with me" line. this, this is important considering what happens directly afterwards - remember how i mentioned desire a few posts ago? lets break it down, "you're here with me." Emmrich has held a consistent view throughout the whole romance that "its gratifying a fresh-faced adventure took any notice in me at all", does emmrich also possess the belief that the love he so dearly desired may not of been possible in his life time due to his age? i think so. which is why desire and the "wow, you're here with me" is so, so important. Now watch closely -

he looks defeated, ashamed - "why would someone like her be with someone like me? let alone, desire me."

the pose, how he is holding his chest and his body up against the coffin, the disbelief and sadness that is pained over his face. he is heavy with angst. this man wants rook, body and soul. he is SO in love with her. god my heart breaks typing this. he is so in love with her, but is so afraid that she doesnt want him now that he is undead - I will add in here to think back to when he was mortal, 3 flirts lines in total were regarding his looks. UGH, just stab me - ps the music in this scene rips out my heart, stomps on it, and shoves it back into my chest bloodied and bruised.

when rook touches him, his face unstiffens and his body relaxes. he looks at her nervously, but before he can address her or admit his pain, rook has NOTICED (YAY - take that argument scene rook) what is bothering emmrich, because she loves him so much, maybe even more, regardless of his undead figure. "You don't have to hide your face from me" is just a perfect way of phrasing that you are made for eachother. rook reassures emmrich of her undying love for him.

its that gomez and morticia dynamic, unwavering, obsessed dedication to eachother. a bond that strengthens the other. for emmrich and rook at least, theri dynamic is so strong I wholeheartedly believe the death of one, would break the mind and soull of the other.

there is so, so much emotion in this scene and most of it is written into the facial expressions and movements of the characters. watch how the fear of death becomes easier now that emmrich knows that rook loves him truly -

im not crying, you are -

this WRECKED me. because there is a slimmer of hope in his voice and particularly the words he chose. "I will let nothing part us again, my love" emmrich is a lich lord, with powers we dont understand just yet (cmon sequel with rook & emmrich), it is safe to say though that emmrich and rook would fight for and protect eachother to the death so that they may not be parted. This also takes me back to my original point of not letting anything part them, nothing - not even death. hence my belief that emmrich would do anything to find rook in the fade or any other world.

"Not in this nor any other world" - do i need say more? the hope seeps through, its not alot, but its there. don't get me wrong, he still has a crippling fear of death, but its, different. different in the sense that if rook was to pass or trapped somewhere, he would get them back and find his way to them, at all costs, one way or another.

the rest of the scene is very, very sweet and shows them being happy for the extra few hours they have together before facing untold danger - by either rook being able to see the fade through emmrichs eyes, or them boning again. actually i think both lead to boning.

this scene has me in absolute tears everytime I witness it because it is so powerful. it is hopeful. it is pure committment of their relationship and bond to eachother. combining this with the knowledge of the argument scene and having played through the mortal romance path, this - is extremely emotional.

Both romance scene are emotional and touching in their own regard - however, I do think the lich romance scene is more deep due to the dynamic. It is not about simply coming to grips with mortality, it is coming to grips with mourning your lover for eternity, and if you cant bear it for eternity, (which he wont, cmon) he is afraid. afraid of losing, rook. his heart. his dearest heart, and of losing himself because rook is, and I quote, "the most magnificent thing to ever happen to me."

mourn watch rook and emmrich are on a whole other level, and that level is something that is told in the minute details, the edging looks. the tone of voice. there is hope in this scene and a sense of overwhelming love and acceptance, but, there is also impending grief. which makes this story so real.

you can feel emmrich yearning for rook throughout the entire romance path because of the fated connected they share, in this and any other world. you can feel it. but this, in the lich scene? there is yearning, acceptance, hope, grief, joy, and melancholy all in one. without a doubt in my heart, these two, are made for eachother, in every world.

I shall break down the mortal romance scene next ♥ see you soon

[hana-no-seiiki]

WHAT’S UP DANGER?

— [ CH 01 ] WITH GREAT ABILITY COMES GREAT ACCOUNTABILITY

pairings: yandere! various (batfam, spiderverse) x miles morales! reader

tw/cw: no yandere themes for this chapter, characters get aged up later on but are teens to young adults now, reader is gender neutral but characters refer to them with masculine terms (hijo, man, dude), spoilers for spiderverse movies. but ofc since this is a crossover it won’t be completely the same.

status: unedited

[masterlist] [next]

REPLY TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST

“Mama, stop you’re covering me with your saliva—!” You groaned as you made a half-assed attempt at pushing your mother away.

It was the first day of your attendance at Gotham Visions and you weren’t the least bit nervous. Not at all. Totally. It wasn’t as if you were just thrusted into this situation with no choice whatsoever in addition to the pressure of your family’s wholeass livelihood on your shoulder. No. You were completely cool with this situation. In fact, you were so cool that you’re almost late to your first day of classes.

“But you look so adorable, mi hijo!” Your mother rubbed her face all over yours, messing up whatever you decided to put on.

“Papa what are you doing? Arrest this woman at once, for gross misconduct or whatever—“

“You do look adorable, and if I do I’d have to be fair and arrest you for vandalism.”

You freeze at your father’s not so subtle call out, before swiftly slithering away from your mother’s bear-like grip.

“Augh! I’m going to be late! Hasta luego!”

It was August. The start of a new school year for you. A new life away from your family and friends.

Gotham Visions University. A campus filled with elitists; fancy rich people. The cream of the crop. Your future school. Being a scholar there would have been fine, amazing even! If it wasn’t something you won through a lottery. You felt like a thief, an imposter. Going to a school for prodigies and rich kids as an average old joe is one thing, going to a school for prodigies and rich kid as a poor lottery student is another.

“[Y/N]! How you doing man? Lookin fancy. The uniform so fits ya.” A kid hangs his arm around you. If you were being completely honest you weren’t sure about his name, but you hung out often for basketball and other activities around the neighborhood. With the amount of people that knew you around the community, it was difficult keeping all those faces in your head so you often covered it up with nicknames.

“Psh. See ya next friday for shawarma?” You winked, cringing a little inside for your actions.

But to your utter surprise, the kid in turn blushes before giving you a massive grin. “You bet. My treat!”

And just a few seconds afterwards, he hits you at the back of the head before leaving, “Hey! Ow.”

“[Y/N]! Good luck on school dude! We’ll miss ya! Don’t be a stranger okay? We’re still friends even if he isn’t here.” He waves you goodbye before returning to your mutual posse of friends.

You wave back at them, your expression slowly turning into a solemn one. “I’ll miss ya guys too.”

Grabbing your trusty wireless headphones, you make your way down the block. Sticking random name-tags you drew this morning to distract yourself from the overflowing anxiety in your system.

Unfortunately, it never is a good idea to be so distracted when walking by yourself.

“Contra!” You hissed as your body hit the pavement. No doubt ruining your uniform that your mother painstakingly agonized over getting perfect and neat for your first day.

Then, the sound of a police siren entered your ears.

Can your day get any worse?

“What did I tell you about not looking both sides twice before crossing the streets?”

Your father’s sermon began.

This . . . was going to be a long ride.

“That I shouldn’t do it.” You replied, completely uninterested in the conversation and looking out from the window.

“You’re lucky it was me y’know! What if some deranged man decided to run you over?”

Your faced smooshed on your hand as your elbow rested on the window sill. “I’d send my cop of a father after them then.”

“Don’t act cute with me [Y/N].”

“But it works oh, so, well.”

Your father sighed, “It does.”

“But with great ability comes great accountability!

“Yeah yeah, that isn’t how the saying goes! . . . It was my bad it won’t happen ag…” Right as you were about to tune out of the interaction with your father once more you notice a bunch of people looking towards your direction.

People you knew.

And now they were taking pictures.

“Wow, aren’t you the popular kid?”

“Mier — Can’t you run the red light or shout at them or something? My poor privacy is being invaded!” You desperately tried to hide yourself with your hands but to no avail. The sounds of clicking only grow louder, and your father’s pace on the car slower.

“Yeah yeah~ not this cop.”

“Papa!”

Suddenly, the attention is ripped off of you as a loud crashing noise resounds from above. “Woah.”

Your dad flicked his tongue in annoyance as he checked the damages. “Those vigilantes! Red Hood is one thing, but that Spider-man partner of his. I swear. He just swings by without a care in the world. I just got this repaired last week!”

“I think he saved you from having to get yourself fixed as well. You know, in a hospital. The place with all the bills that just tears holes into your wallet.” You checked the situation outside, confirming the lack of interest in your situation as people crowded spider-man’s fight. “And myself from a mob too. That man’s a whole multitasker and a half.”

“If you ever get a sibling, remind me not to teach them cheek.”

“That if depends on you, yknow.” You gave your dad the smuggest grin you can muster.

Hey, if he’s going to make you face hell for the next few years you might as well give him a portion of it while you had the time.

The car halts, signaling your arrival at the aforementioned hell. “Study well. Our future depends on you, [Y/N]. Love ya.”

“I know.” You groaned, struggling a little to pull your baggage outside of the vehicle and leaving as soon as you got it secured within your grasp.

You are only able to take a few steps when your dad interrupts with the police car’s loudspeaker.

“Where’s my ‘I love you too, papa’ huh?”

“Papa! Seriously?” You screeched, unimaginably embarrassed beyond belief.

“I love you.”

“Right in front of my future peers?”

“I loovveee youuu.”

“On the first day of class?!”

“Mwah mwah—“

“I LOVE YOU TOO!” You relented. Making a sharp turn from facing the originator of your future bully’s material, towards the entrance of Gotham Visions.

Once you get in you make an attempt to greet the people there, but is cut off by their mocking voices referring and imitating the situation earlier.

The embarrassment fills you up once more and you fail to notice your path intersecting with another.

Directly bumping into people seriously knocks the wind out of a dude. That’s probably why those people in those ‘mangas’ he always made you read fell in love at first sight. They were just so light-headed that they couldn’t think clearly.

“P-pretty girl—“

“It’s nice to meet you too.” said pretty girl as she steadied your form. Noticeably less affected by the impact “You’re quite the looker yourself.”

“Ack, sorry! I just get nervous around- yeah.”

She giggled. Oh lord, even her laugh was pretty. “Lovely papa you got there.”

“Augh, you don’t have to remind me.” You pinched the bridge of your nose, slowly regaining your balance.

The bell rings. The real hell has officially begun.

Once pretty girl made sure you were alright, she began running off.

Wow, even the way she ran was pretty.

“W-w-wait, what’s your name?”

“Gwen!”

You sighed as left you behind in the crowd of students.

This wasn’t so bad, you thought. You made one acquaintance at the very least. Maybe your new life at this school would be better.

Your new life at Gotham Visions was, in fact, not getting better.

You were fumbling through the motions like a newborn thrown to the wolves. If you hadn’t built a relatively tight knit friendship with Gwen you were sure you would have ran away by now.

Everyone always ignored you when you greeted them. Your dormmate didn’t even see you as someone worthy to interact with and would often stay awake at ungodly hours doing whatever the hell he was doing on his laptop while you suffered from his ‘background music.’ Your parents only ever talked to you about academics when it was the last thing you wanted on your mind at weekends. You were always, always late to class.

You were practically falling apart at the seams.

You just . . . wanted everything to end. But you couldn’t bring yourself to defy your parents and so you brought it up to your studies. Purposely failing exams so you’d be kicked out soon enough.

“A zero. How terrible. A few more of those and you’ll have to kick me out huh?” You looked at your Physics teacher with a loosely smug look on your face. You hated Physics, the sciences and mathematics the most out of all subjects. Everything second you spent learning about it could have been spent drawing or doing something you actually adored.

You shrugged, “Maybe I’m just not right for this school.”

“If a person wearing a blindfold picked the answers on a multiple choice exam at random do you know what score they would get?”

“. . . Around 25%?”

“That’s right!” She flicked her pen towards you face before pressing the butt end of it to your paper.

“The only way they would get all the answers wrong . . . “ She then twirls around, marking your grade from 0 to 100 by placing the respective numbers to each side. “Is to know which answers are right.

“You’re trying to quit, and I’m not going to let you.” The smug look only your face slowly dissipates and transfers to her own visage. “Now I know you’ll probably try to worm yourself out of this which is why I’m calling in back-up.”

“Wayne.” The woman moved her gaze to your classmate. A strained smile on her lips as she stared him down.

You didn’t know the billionaire’s son that well, or any of your peers but Gwen for that matter. Just that he was as stuck up as his gelled up hair. Always sneering at you whenever you had to sit beside him with those uncannily pretty green eyes of his. You thought that it may have been your smell or something. Maybe he could tell how poor you are in comparison by your scent. But judging by the fact that he was just as much of a loner as you were if not more, you’re beginning to think otherwise.

“I’m assigning you two an essay, not on physics but on yourselves. What kind of person you want to be. I know you two are quite different in terms of personality and backgrounds, but I have a feeling it’ll all work out.” She walked behind the two of you, roughly placing her hands on both of your shoulders before squeezing you closer together. “And no, Damian. I’ll know if you decide to finish it all yourself. Don’t test me.”

“You two are dismissed!”

Damian takes one look at you and you can tell he’s listed a thousand things he disliked about you already. He re-secured his backpack prior to giving you one, heftily stern warning. “Listen, we’re going to meet at my house this weekend. 6pm. Don’t be late.”

“Sure! Where’s your . . .” and before you could even complete your question, he was gone. Just like that. “. . .house. . .”

You grabbed your own belongings with a moan; betting that the trust fund kid’s own probably costed a hundred if not a thousand more times than yours.

You swiftly go to your room. Mind completely empty and disassociated before an idea crosses your head.

You dial in the numbers on your phone before you could even think properly.

“Hey, Unc. Mind if I come over?”

No matter where you went. The route to your Uncle Aaron’s house was always in the back of your head. He was your true home. The only man who understood you — who made the effort to understand you.

You spot him on his couch, looking as cool and swag as ever with his legs spread a little bit apart. He laughed as you smooshed your face to his window before opening it and letting you tumble into his abode.

You lazily dropped the bag you brought filled with spray paint.

He patted your head and massaged your scalp, the stress you felt already noticed and acknowledged. “Sup little dude. You lookin’ down. Is this about . . .”

“What? No. I’ve already moved on—“You shook your head. In all honesty, the only good part about Gotham Visions was that it kept you distracted from grief. But before you could continue you spot a familiar image settled in a frame. Emotions started crashing down upon you like a tidal wave. “You . . . kept the picture.”

Aaron rubbed his thumb across your cheek as your eyes began watering, “You know I can bring you over to visit him. It’s pretty close by y’know.”

“I- I think I’m good. I came here to just chill out, y’know?”

“Let’s go, I know a spot we can let some of that pent up art juice out.”

A smile. A real one. Not one you forced on yourself whenever you met with your classmates, Gwen or your parents started to make a reprise on your face. You almost don’t remember the last time you did it because of your emotions and not due of the façade of being okay.

“See ya.”

You take one last look at the photo before rushing out with your uncle.

“Mig.”

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[bumblebeesfromvenus]

The Kiss of a Siren 🫧

Pirate!Leon S Kennedy x Siren!reader

A/N: it's done!!! I actually love how this turned out! This was a really fun pairing to write and I can totally see myself writing more Pirate!Leon in the future :)

~Fi 🐝

《Content》: a little bit of gore, but not descriptive. Death (a girl's gotta eat)Luis cameo! MIKE CAMEO! Leon runs straight into danger (Aka being Leon)

《Word count》: 6.1k

Please don't copy my work! I put a lot of effort and heart into the things I write.

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ──🌊── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ──🌊── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

The ocean laid almost still, only soft and gentle waves blew over the water, causing it to ripple and lap at the wooden hull of his mighty ship. His gaze turned towards the horizon, watching as the moon reflected and glitter on the surface.

There was a soft slosh from his nearly empty bottle of rum as he took another swig, the burning as it went down starting a fire in his veins and being the only thing shielding him from the cold and salty breeze.

It was dark, all lights extinguished. His crew and his first mate were slumbering peacefully beneath deck, all rocked to sleep by the sea.

A feeling of melancholy washed over him as a sigh rolled off his lips. He knew his heart belonged to the sea, but he couldn't help the pressing loneliness in his chest on nights like these, wishing he had a fair lady to love.

Maybe then he'd consider coming home now and then.

He loved the ocean dearly, but she couldn't dry his tears and fill his arms as a woman of his own could.

He shook off the thought, taking a breath and focusing on the peaceful sway of his ship, looking forward to another day of wearing his Tricorn. Stolen, of course, although earned. Perhaps not by the accords of the Captain he'd snagged it from, but by his loyal crew.

Although Leon was a pirate, he wasn't heartless. He'd been through every terrible storm and ruthless attack with these men, and they respected him as their Captain.

There was no mutiny, no plans of overthrowing him, simply because he hadn't given them a reason to.

He was often called the Robin Hood of the seven seas; taking from the rich and cocky and giving it to the less fortunate. Of course he still plundered purely for the fun of it, but only other pirates.

They knew to avoid him, especially if they were the rowdy kind that took from the poor.

Because, above all, he wasn't just the greatest pirate Captain since Anne Bonny but a harbinger of justice that could both lend a gentle hand to those in need and strike fear into the hearts of anyone who had crossed him or his morals.

He was pulled out of his self pity by a distressed sound that cut through the silence of the night like a freshly sharpened cutlass. His brows pulled together as his eyes searched for the source of this noise.

Leon was on high alert, he wouldn't be surprised if rival pirates were using distress calls as bait for an ambush. Setting down the empty bottle of dark rum, he went over to the other side of his ship, facing the sandy shore.

And, as if the gods wanted him to see, he spotted a woman desperately clinging onto a large rock in the water. She was perfectly illuminated by the moonlight, even as she sobbed and struggled, she looked ethereal.

Leon sprung into action and climbed down the rope ladder at the side of his ship into a row boat.

What he hadn't noticed in his hurry, however, was the faint glow of a lantern being lit and a dark figure watching him carefully from atop his ship.

"Hold on, I'm coming for you!" He said loudly, rowing with his entire might as he saw the woman slipping.

"I-.. I can't hold on much longer, please help me!" She wept, seemingly trying to dig her nails into the algae covered boulder as best she could. Seeing her in such distress made his heart ache.

He didn't want to imagine what the outcome would be if he hadn't spotted her. With heaving breaths and a pull in the muscles of his arms, he rowed closer and closer, seeing her more clearly now.

She was quite beautiful, with her wet hair clinging to her skin and her tears glittering on her cheeks.

His boat bumped into the rock as he jumped up and held out his hand for her to grasp onto.

"Here. Just take my hand, I'll help you." Leon heaved, trying to steady the wooden vessel.

You reached for him, tightly clinging to his arm as he reeled you in like a fisherman would his catch of the day.

How ironic, you thought, having to stop yourself from smirking.

Your tail swished in the water, concealed by its darkness, as you made an effort to keep up your act.

"Thank you. Gods, you saved my life. I just wanted to bathe but the current ripped me away and I couldn't-" You babbled through sobs and wails.

"Calm down, alright? I've got you. You're safe." He spoke softly, much softer than you'd anticipated.

His huge yet gentle hands were steadied on your upper arms as you tightly gripped the edge of the boat.

"I'll help you into the boat." He breathed, now very aware of your bare skin. Your eyes widened slightly and your grip tightened.

"I- no, no, I... I'm so exhausted... I just need a break.." you tried to assure him with a half hearted smile.

"Oh, yes, of course." He chuckled awkwardly, sitting back down but still keeping a hand on you, just in case.

Your eyes glid over his form. His broad shoulders and bulging arms with a strong chest. Not to mention the mix of soft and sharp features and those beautiful blue eyes.

They reminded you of home. The deep, silent and peaceful parts of the ocean.

Lucky you; your dinner looked extra delicious today. Your mouth watered at the mere thought of sinking your teeth into his flesh and taking a bite.

It was quiet except for the waves crashing onto the rocks and the small ripples caused by you sloshing agaisnt the wood of his boat. You gazed upon eachother, a scene bathed in the fairest of moonlights, as your shared curiosity took over.

His hand slowly migrated to gentle hold your face as his thumb softly, but not without a hesitant twitch in his fingertips, wiped away at your tears.

Tears that shimmered like diamonds and the most notorious treasures of the seas. Leon was mesmerized, almost captivated, by your presence.

Something was pulling him in, something so deceiving, that he let himself slowly slip into your spell.

"A girl like you shouldn't be out alone past dusk." Leon broke the tense silence with quiet words as he brushed some of the hair clinging to your forehead out of your face. Your lips turned up into a soft smile, and Leon could feel his heart pound at your beauty.

"A girl like me?" You asked playfully, trailing you hand from the wooden edge to gently grasp at his arm. He thought for a moment.

"A girl so... beautiful. So sweet. So soft." His words were merely above a whisper and you could see his chest falling and rising just a little faster than before.

His pupils almost swallowed up the entirety of his pretty blues, making you mourn the mirroring image of your home.

"You flatter me." You replied with a soft chuckle, your other hand rising up to plant itself against his chest. He instinctively leaned forwards, his warm breath tickling your face.

There was a hint of sadness in your chest and it was getting harder to play the part. It seemed so easy to fall for those sandy locks and ocean eyes.

The line was awfully thin and you'd be damned if you crossed it.

"Tell me, what's your name?" You asked innocently, fiddling with the strings of his shirt.

"Leon." He swallowed thickly, his other hand itching to dip beneath the surface of the water, pull you out and whisk you away as his treasure, only for him to know the beauty that you hid beneath that darkness.

"Leon..." You tested his name on your tongue with a small smile and gazed up at him with such a bright sparkle in your eyes. Leon thought he was about to choke on air.

You gently, but with a firm hand, pulled him closer to you, your lips just a hairs breadth apart.

"What is it you desire, Leon?" You purred, your eyes darkening. Leon was hunched over, halfway to toppling into the water.

Right where you wanted him. His lips were parted and his cheeks were flushed, his pupils dilated so much you could spot yourself in them.

"You." He breathed out, leaning in far enough to brush your lips together.

You cracked a smile and brought your lips to his ear.

"How unfortunate." You whispered.

Those words made him snap back into reality, the hazy fog over his mind lifted enough to catch the sharp teeth as you smiled and the scattered, shimmering scales he'd missed before.

But it was no use.

The second he had realized, he was pulled under, ripped from his steady seat in the boat and plunged into dreadful darkness.

The air was knocked from his lungs and he struggled against your surprisingly strong hold on him as you dragged him deeper. Leon could see the moonlight fading, reaching out for it.

You, on the other hand, were euphoric. Ravenous for your meal.

Usually, you'd wait. Drown your prey and watch the life drain from their eyes, making them dull. But there was something about him that made you so impatient. So eager to get a taste.

Without another thought you sunk your teeth into his strong shoulder and reveled in the sweet taste of his flesh.

Leon screamed out in agony, but it was dulled and muffled by the water. Bubbles rose up as he desperately tried to get you off of him. His strength was exhausted, and the red tinting the water blurred his vision.

You hummed against his skin at the delightful taste of him. To your dismay, your feast was cut short by a loud noise, making you detach from Leon and flinch away.

Before you could get far, there was a searing pain in your tail, the salty waters now stained with your blood instead of his. A silvery harpoon was embedded in your tail, shooting hot spikes of agony up your spine.

You swam as fast as you could with the weapon in your fin, bullets whizzing past you as your form merged into the deep blue, vanishing before his eyes.

Leon pushed up to the surface with his uninjured arm before a hand plunged into the water and grasped him tightly before pulling him up to the surface.

He gasped for air and heaved in deep breaths as someone wrangled him into the boat.

The shirt on his left shoulder was ripped and stained with deep crimson as the rest of the wet fabric clung to his sculpted body. There were heavy pats on his back as he coughed up water, wincing at the excruciating pain in his shoulder.

"¡Joder! Are you alright, Capitán?" The frantic voice of his ever so loyal first mate, Luis Serra, rang in his ears, making him slack in relief.

"¡Mierda!. That beast got you good, huh?" He tried to lift the mood with a chuckle but Leon couldn't respond, his head spinning as he slowly took in his surroundings again.

Luis had a lit lantern with him, which got knocked over in his attempt to save Leon, his blunderbuss laid in the boat, smoke pluming from the barrel. A couple of harpoons were laid out as well, ones they'd usually use for fishing.

"Thank... Thank you.." Leon forced through heavy breaths as he held his bleeding shoulder.

"Always, Captain. Let's get you fixed up, eh, Sancho Panza?" Luis grinned helping Leon up onto the ship, who cracked a tired smirk at the friendly banter.

.·:*¨༺ ��¨*:·.

Leon was lost in thought as he sat on the edge of his sofa, a singular lantern illuminating his day cabin. He chewed on the inside of his cheek as he replayed the events in his mind.

With a heavy sigh he slumped back against the soft cushion, wincing when he adjusted his arm. There were so any feelings weighing down on him. Pure, hot fury. The urge to hunt you down, gut you and hang you out to dry.

He knew of your kind, of course he knew, the maneating maidens with the voice of a nightingale. Half fish, half woman. Sirens caused the worst shipwrecks, he'd heard the stories from the very few that were lucky enough to escape their clawed grasp.

There was shame. Ashamed that someone like him was so easily fooled by a pair of pretty eyes and a smile so sweet he could feel his teeth ache.

Was he just desperate and pathetic? Longing so deeply for a maiden of his own that he'd jumped at the first opportunity? Wasn't it honorable that he'd sprung into action to save a damsel in distress? He didn't know. He lived up to his reputation, that's for sure, but Leon couldn't bring himself to take the credit. He never could.

And then there was this bubbling curiosity. The urge to know more, to see you again. He didn't understand. You'd almost taken his life, yet there was not an ounce of fear for you in him. He was intrigued, he needed to see you again.

Whether it was to squeeze answers out of you or to get a smidge of that connection back.

He damn near broke his head in two that night after he'd retreated to bed, wondering if some of it was real. It felt real to him.

The way you looked at him, spoke to him, touched him. It all seemed so real and genuine. Were creatures like you even able to feel things of that sort? He didn't know.

What he did know was not only had you had his flesh between your sharp teeth, but his heart, too, it seemed.

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

The sun sparkled on the surface of the ocean as the Lone Rookie treaded along her path, splitting the waves.

Captain Kennedy and his crew were leisurely sailing across the calm sea, letting the tide guide them. He stood atop the quaterdeck, giving directions to the pirate that manned the wheel, knowing this part of the wide ocean like the back of his hand.

His first mate was keeping watch over the remaining crew, making sure their daily tasks were done as they should be.

Some were scrubbing the deck, others were covered in soot from keeping the cannons in good condition while the rest was busy hoisting the sails.

His coat looked pristine and elegant with the golden appliques sewn onto it. His Tricorn sat proudly atop his sandy locks adorned by a large, fluffy feather. His leather boots shone in the sun, same as his belt, that held his cutlass and blunderbuss.

His shoulder was still healing, the arm hanging close to his body instead of in the sleeve of the coat to minimize the strain.

It had been weeks since he almost met his end at your hands. Leon's mind had been occupied by thoughts of you since, wondering if he'd ever see you again.

There was shouting coming from the crow's nest, drawing his attention away from thoughts of you. They were coming up to a small formation of sharp rocks emerging from the water, but the lookout claimed to have seen something shimmering, bringing hope for it to be a lost treasure.

The Lone Rookie was carefully maneuvered closer to the boulders, being mindful so she wouldn't shatter to pieces against the rocks. But before anyone had the chance to inspect this mystery further, all heads turned in search of a soft melody that seemed to he carried by the wind.

Upon one summer's morning, I carefully did stray

Down by the Walls of Wapping, where I met a sailor gay

Conversion with a young lass, who seemed to be in pain

Saying William, when you go, I fear you'll never return again

Whispers and questions echoed across the deck as they searched for the source of this enchanting tune. The crew slowly moved in tandem, migrating towards the edge of the ship.

Leon's brows furrowed as he took out his spyglass and tried to spot something between the rocks against the blinding sun.

A shiver ran down his spine when he laid his eyes on none other than you, in all your beautiful, sparkling glory. Your tail shimmered in all colors, and your skin was glistening from the water.

You were going to be the demise of his ship if he didn't act now. With a quick movement his spyglass was attached to his belt once again.

"Everyone below deck. Now!" He yelled, seemingly breaking his men from their trance. They scattered like rats, obeying their Captain.

"Capitán-" Luis began but was swiftly cut off.

"You too. Now."

"Leon-"

"Go."

With hesitancy Luis, too, made his way below deck. Though he did stay close, just in case. How his Captain thought he was invincible made him want to shake his head.

Leon kept his eyes on you, a hand resting on his blunderbuss. He spotted one of his men, a gunner named Mike, out of the corner of his eye.

"Mike, get below deck. Now!" He yelled, not getting a reaction.

The gunner's arms hung slack by his side as he slowly stepped further towards that lovely melody, drawing him in.

My heart is pierced by Cupid

I disdain all glittering gold

There is nothing can console me

But my jolly sailor bold

The words glid easily off your tongue as you eyed your next meal before your gaze flitted to Leon for a moment. He locked eyes with you and you could faintly see him scowl which made the corners of your mouth twitch upwards in a mischievous smile.

Mike had now reached the edge and was leaning over, his pupils dilated as his eyes were trained on you and your beauty.

"Mike!" Leon rushed towards him, gripping his shoulders and trying to pry him away from what would be his certain death.

As if suddenly possessed by inhuman strength he shook his Captain off of him with ease and climbed down the rope ladder at the side of the ship.

"Goddammit." Leon cursed under his breath.

"Snap out of it! Don't listen to to her!" He tried to reason with his best gunner, but there was only so much he could do from atop the ship.

Leon watched as Mike eagerly descended into the water and swam your way.

You held out your hand in a tantalizing manner, watching as he reached you and desperately clawed his way up the rock.

His hair it hangs in ringlets, his eyes as black as coal

My happiness attend him wherever he may go

From Tower Hill to Blackwall, I'll wander, weep and moan

All for my jolly Sailor, until he sails home

Mike panted with a smile has he gazed upon you.

"The gods have heard me." He spoke brightly, steadying himself with one hand in the slippery rock and the other on your hip.

The gesture made you want to physically recoil. They usually never lived along enough to lay a hand on you. Still, you put on your best face and cupped his cheek, pulling him closer.

My heart is pierced by Cupid

I disdain all glittering gold

There is nothing can console me

But my jolly sailor bold

With the last, softly sung note you chuckled, a sound that could rival your singing. Mike drew closer, his breath on your face.

Your stomach twisted and turned when you remembered who else's warm breath you could feel on your face just a few moons ago. A much more pleasant and welcome sensation than from your next meal.

"You're all I've ever wanted." Mike spoke quietly, making you giggle and lean in to whisper in his ear.

"What a shame."

Your teeth dug into the side of his neck, puncturing his jugular as he let out a blood curdling scream and desperately clutched his neck.

In a calculated move, you slid down the rock with a tight grip on your prey and pulled him under, his blood staining your skin.

Leon's blood boiled as he watched one of his best men die in front of him. He wanted to gut you and parade around your corpse for everyone to see, but there was a sick and twisted jealousy in the pit of his stomach.

You had charmed and enchanted Mike just as you had him, but there was a part deep inside his heart that hoped he was special. You didn't put up a damsel on distress act for Mike, but you did for him. Surely all that effort must've meant something? He felt nauseous at his thoughts and returned his attention back to you.

You were smiling at him, your sharp teeth stained with blood before you dove under and splashed your fin, a noticeable scar from the harpoon sitting on the glittering skin.

He slammed his fists down on the wooden railing, a few splinters flying overboard. Luis emegered from below deck and hurried toward him.

"What happened?" He asked hurriedly. Leon stayed silent for a moment, sighing deeply, his eyes trained on the pool of red around the rocks.

"She got Mike." He spoke coldly, faintly hearing the gasps and sounds of sorrow from his crew.

His jaw clenched as he swiftly turned on his heel and waltzed towards his cabin, slamming the door shut behind him.

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

The death laid heavy on him as he tried to find some solace at the bottom of yet another bottle of rum. Though not alone in his state of mourning,

Luis sat next to him, puffing a cigar. Not as his first mate, but as his friend.

"I have to find her." Leon spoke sternly, deep in his thoughts.

His hands were intertwined and tucked under his chin, most of his weight resting on his elbows.

"Won't be too hard. She keeps showing up where you are. Maybe she likes you." Luis grinned, tapping his cigar over the glass ashtray.

Leon hated how that speculation made his heart jump in his chest. He shouldn't feel like this, especially after you'd cruelly killed one of his best men. But he just couldn't help the giddy feeling in his stomach. He didn't physically react apart from a sharp glare that made Luis put his hands up in mock surrender, and the faintest of blushes dusted on his cheeks.

"You know what they say about the kiss of a Siren, eh?" Luis began with a mischievous smirk, taking a drag from the roll of tobacco. Leon leaned back into his chair with a tight-lipped sigh.

"What, that you'll 'control the mighty seas and command the storms'? All bullshit if you ask me." He muttered, a slight frown on his face.

"Whatever you say, Capitán." Luis blew a new plume of smoke with a faint smirk playing on his lips.

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

You carefully poked your head out of the water and watched the Lone Rookie, specifically the handsome Pirate Captain that you'd gotten a taste of.

You've been mesmerized by him ever since you met him that night. Those kind eyes, that gentle touch... could he really be a pirate? He was nothing like the dirty brutes that you had the displeasure of meeting.

Your curiosity is what urged you to follow his ship and observe him almost every day since you'd eaten one of his crew. You did feel a little bad about it afterward, guilt eating away at you as you twirled a button from his shirt between your fingers.

What we're you even going to do with it? Give it Leon as a peace offering? Now, that seemed unnecessarily cruel.

In your defense, you had to eat something. It wasn't your fault that you were cursed to be a Maneater.

Some were whiny and outright annoying while others disgusted you to the point where you'd just leave them drifting in the sea and went off to find another, their behavior ruining your appetite.

Gods, what were you thinking!? He probably hated you know. A fair outcome, you supposed. You wouldn't be very happy if someone ate one of your friends.

You dove back under, pondering your options. You knew you shouldn't, but something about him was so intriguing that it was impossible for you to stay away.

How ironic that the Siren seemed to be caught in a spell.

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

The panic that arose in your chest as you struggle against the rough rope you'd managed to get tangled in was like nothing you'd felt before.

You were always so careful, kept your distance so no sailor would get their hands on you and do Gods know what.

You clawed and gnawed at the net, hoping your sharp teeth could cut you free. You were getting closer and closer to the surface, your eyes not having enough time to adjust as you were ripped from the deep.

Making yourself as small as possible, you waited in dreadful anticipation, saying goodbye to the ocean.

"This' a big one, Cap'n!" One of his men cackled, grunting as he continued to pull in the net.

Leon quirked a brow and stepped down from the quaterdeck, his belt rustling and his boots clacking against the wood as he walked. He waited patiently as his men reeled in their net, speculating about a big fish that would last them for weeks.

They plopped you down onto the deck unceremoniously, your tail hitting the floor with a thud as you pressed your back agaisn the railing, hoping to just disappear.

You hadn't even noticed Leon yet, to caught up in your fear to see how his eyes almost popped out of his head as his gaze landed on you.

"You." He breathed out, an unidentifiable mix of emotions in his tone.

Your head shot up, recognizing his voice, before it quickly fell again in shame, avoiding all eye contact with the handsome Captain. There were murmurs and whispers form the crew, some demanding to get revenge for their dearest friend and others that were interested in how much you'd go for on the fish market.

"What do we do with her, Capitán?" Luis asked from behind him, an uncharacteristically unsure tone to his usually so confident demeanor.

Leon's mind was void of all rational thoughts as he kept taking you in. How you cowered and kept your head down, seemingly afraid to even move a single muscle.

You were so confident in the water, seducing and luring men to their demise, but as soon as you hot caught on dry land all that cockiness evaporated and you looked more like a scared girl than a flesh-eating monster of the seas. He glanced around quickly before answering his first mate.

"Put her in that barrel." Leon gestures towards it haphazardly, continuing to bore holes into you with his look.

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

That's how you ended up here. Cramped in a wooden barrel, sailors shooting you weird looks as you tried your best to sink as deep as you could, hoping to run from their judgmental gazes.

You'd find Leon staring at you from afar, striking under his gaze.

The protection of the sea was gone now. You were out of your element, and he was in his. You tried your best to behave, hoping they'd just get bored of you eventually.

Your first attempt at escaping and went as followed;

You nervously glanced around the deck, hoping you'd catch a moment where no eyes were on you. Leon seemed occupied looking at various maps with his first mate, while the crew was busy fulfilling their duties. You took your chance and took a breath to start singing, hoping you'd get them to dump you overboard so you could swim for it.

Before even a single not left your throat, a large hand was slapped over your mouth, muffling any sounds you would've made. Leon stood above you, his stature completely blocking off the sun.

"Don't even think about it. One of my men was enough." He said lowly, fueling the fire of guilt in your heart. You tried your best to ignore how his touch sent a prickly feeling down your spine.

You'd crossed the line miles ago, and you were swimming straight for the Bermuda triangle.

The sparkling moonlight on the ripple of the sea brought you no solace as you stared at the deep blue with longing, wishing you were back in your home.

You'd been on the Lone Rookie for about a week. Leon insisted on not letting you starve, to the dismay of some of his men, so they fed a part of their daily catches to you.

It wasn't human flesh, but enough to keep you going. Although you were around people all day, you hadn't felt more lonely. The disgusted expressions and whispered insults started to wear on you.

You were here only because you couldn't resist a couple of blue eyes and sandy hair that reminded you of the bottom of the ocean.

The door of the Captain's cabin opened and Leon stepped out with a lantern in hand, walking towards you.

Your heart was starting to beat faster but you still wouldn't meet his eyes. He placed the light on the railing next to you and leaned against it, staying quiet. You could tell he wanted to look at you, maybe even talk to you, but he held himself back.

The button in your hand seemed to almost burn your skin as you grasped it tighter. This was your chance at mercy and freedom.

"I'm... I'm sorry about your friend." You muttered quietly, the water in the barrel splashing gently as you turned your body to face Leon.

He was slightly stunned at your apology, maybe that you spoke at all, yet he didn't reply.

You bit your tongue, not knowing whether saying any more would be a good idea. You wordlessly lifted your hand out of the water and presented the button to him.

A soft crease formed between his brows as he eyes the button.

".. What's this?" He asked quietly.

You swallowed and raised your hand higher.

"From your friend." Your voice was merely above a whisper.

Hid jaw slacked slightly before he let his head fall forwards and let out a soft huff.

"Thank you." He replied softly as he took the button and squeezed it tightly, holding his hand to his chest.

There was a beat of silence before all your self-control left you, and you couldn't stop the words that spilled out of your mouth.

"I just couldn't stay away from you. That's what got me into this whole mess." You sighed, resting your head against the rim of the barrel.

Leon's head snapped towards you, your words igniting fire in his heart.

"You're just so... so.. different. I didn't actually think anyone would come to save me that night. I mean, I wasn't actually in trouble, but it was nice, still. You're nice. Not like all the other pirates I've met. They're rough and rude and.. you're not. I just can't stay away."

You laid your heart out for him. His heart was about to jump out of his chest, and his cheeks were dusted in a deep pink as he processed your confession.

He was speechless, his brain trying to come up with an answer.

You, on the other hand, were tugging at your hair, anxiously waiting for a reply. He could reject you, and you'd finally be able to move on, but as long as the option of him reciprocating was there, so were you.

Leon swallowed thickly, the way the moonlight was shining down one you once again not making it easier for him to finally find his words.

"I can't stay away either..." he confessed quietly.

"I know it sounds silly considering that's your whole deal, but... It felt real to me. Even if you bit me, even if you killed my best gunner, I..." he chuckled, running a hand through his hair and looking up at the stars.

"I've never... felt like that before. Never thought love was in the cards for me. You changed that." He spoke softly, gently guiding your head to look at him.

It was the first time you'd actually met his eye for days and it felt like your heart was going to melt right out of your chest. You were just as stunned by his words as he was by yours.

"It was real." You replied eagerly, lifting yourself out of the barrel to be closer to him.

"You remind me of my home. Your eyes are like the sea when she's calm and welcoming and your hair is like the sand at the bottom of the ocean, where all sorts of treasures can be found." You rambled breathlessly, the proximity of him making the air hard to breathe

. Leon was breathing heavily just as you were before he helped support you by placing a steady hand on your lower back.

"I just... I'm sorry for biting you, but I had to get a taste." Your face felt hot and your chest was rising and falling faster than normal.

His gentle touch was setting all of your nerves on fire, spiraling them into a hot frenzy.

"What if... what if you get a taste without drawing blood?" He asked in a quiet and breathy voice, a smirk tugging at his lips.

You nodded quickly, grasping onto him wherever you could.

With your confirmation, his strong arm wrapped around your back and he lifted you out of the barrel and onto the railing, holding you tightly, before finally pressing a kiss to your lips

. The desperation and passion in the kiss made you melt against him, a satisfied hum escaping your lips. Leon smiled into the kiss, teasingly squeezing your waist, making you giggle.

You gently held his face, the image of the both of you like that from a painting. You pulled away from each other for air, chests heaving, and your lips slightly puffy.

"I want to keep you forever." He muttered, pressing his forehead to yours.

You chuckled breathlessly, playing with the hair at his nape.

"I'm sorry I can't stay. But I belong out there," you nodded your head in the direction of the sea, "and you belong here." You spoke with a soft smile, placing a peck on his lips.

He made a soft displeased noise.

"Here." you untangled an iridescent shell from your hair and placed it into his palm, closing his hand and bringing it to your lips to press a kiss to his knuckles.

"That way, I'm always with you." His expression softened.

"Thank you."

Leon stuck his hand into his pocket and pulled out a small golden anchor charm, one he'd gotten on one of his first raids and kept as a lucky charm.

"Now, I'm always with you, too." He attached it to the lock of hair you'd taken the shell from, pushing a few strands out of your face with a smile.

"Will you promise me something?" Leon asked quietly, stroking his thumb over your cheekbone.

You hummed softly, leaning into his touch.

"Promise me you'll always sing for me."

You smiled softly and pulled him a little closer.

"I promise. I'll only sing for you." You whispered, gently bumping your nose against his, making him smile.

You pulled him for a last kiss, one he happily indulged, before loosening your grip on him.

Letting yourself fall back from the railing, you elegantly dove into the water, Leon's eyes glued to the shimmering scales of your tail.

You blew him a kiss before diving deep into your home with a heavy heart. It was a bittersweet parting, no doubt, but the trinkets you'd exchanged with your lover would ease the ache.

With a sad smile Leon watched you disappear before retreating for the night. The only thing he'd have to explain in the morning was how you'd escaped and where he got the shimmering shell that was pinned to his coat.

When he heard a soft comforting melody that night, he smiled to himself, keeping your gift close to his heart.

From then on, you were never far. Always circling around the Lone Rookie, keeping an eye on not only Leon but his crew.

The kiss of a Siren might not have given Leon the power to command the sea, it did, however, give him the benefit of a hauntingly beautiful complicit that was more than happy to feed on his enemies.

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ──🌊── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

I hope you liked it!! (you specifically, @sweets3rial <3)

More Leon -> 💫

《tag list》: @vampkennedy @dmitriene @k-fallingstar @agrerion @leonslittlekennedy @allysunny

Let me know if you'd like to be added to my Leon tag list!!

(Sorry for any typos, it's late :,))

[toto-the-cactus]

Primarchs + Daughters (2)

Finally finished the damn part two. Been kinda busy here and there with my new job but lo and behold, the one yall asked for. Soon enough, yall find out why it took me a while writing this one for the two main guys I had to add here.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

Konrad Curze

A’right, I’ll open this one with the fact we all know that this man shouldn’t even be legally allowed to have children. I’m gonna be real for a hot second and admit that I stared at the screen for HOURS not knowing what to write because any poor little girl that is born from this guy will have the dubious privilege of being the most sheltered and hidden secret the Primarch ever kept close. With all those visions of death and inevitable doom mixed with the sudden power rush that fatherhood gave him, it left in its wake a perfect storm for this lunatic to develop a paranoid and obsessive need (NEED) to keep his daughter safe; something hard to achieve when he already knows the essence of his Legion. His fatalistic nature regarding his own future would suddenly clash violently with the Primarch’s new found protective stance concerning his child. It's almost sad to consider that this poor man GENUINELY wished to avoid becoming the monster his visions showed, but knowing that he’ll be balancing in the thin line of one day hurting his precious girl (or worse than that) it'll put him in the hard decision of having to let go of her eventually. He is no Perturabo, for that matter. In the rare and far away moments of lucidity, I can see Konrad choosing to protect the innocence and life of his child by trusting in the last person ANYONE might expect the Night Hunter would seek help: Vulkan. Honestly this is just plain sad, man.

Sanguinius

This is it! The golden boy, yall! We all know the kind of person Sanguinius is, but add a precious little daughter in the equation and all you get is the perfect example of textbook girl dad. No matter how busy this man is, somehow he’ll squish some playtime with his baby and enjoy every bit of it. Seriously, this guy acting like a dedicated father is worth being in a stockphoto image. His baby girl asks him to play tea party? Some astartes will find their Primarch hunched over, awkwardly holding a comically small cup between his thumb and index while his precious princess pretends to pour more tea for herself. The daughter of Sanguinius doesn't go a single day without knowing that her papa loves her a lot and when the man isn’t around, the Blood Angels Legion are close to keep her company to the point that even she calls them ‘big brothers’. No one is safe when she wants to play dress-up. The single problem I see with Sanguinius when raising his little girl is that he sins of being completely oblivious to the more mortal side of his daughter’s needs. He easily gets so wrapped up in his role of The Perfect Angel that he doesn’t realize his tiny princess has boundaries that are being constantly crossed, but since she feels the need to prove that she can be like her father, endures all those problems and refuses to seek help about anything. It becomes a kind of toxic mix considering how much Sanguinius is loved and adored by others, to the point that his daughter becomes like a coveted gem too by relation, making her need to prove her own ‘perfection’ an unconscious action the older she grows. I’m not even gonna touch with a ten feet pole the “fun fact” called the Red Thirst on this one because, let's be fair, that would require for me to write more than 3 pages with ONLY Sanguinius and his daughter in the spotlight and that’s only assuming his baby girl didn’t inherit it. I specialized in visual arts and marketing, not psychology jfc.

Ferrus Manus

It took me a while but after some investigating and more reading I can safely put this man in between the Papa-tier and ‘tough love’ guys. His practical mentality and belief of the strongest are (oddly enough) healthily separated from his parenting skills. This is one of the few Primarch that can see their daughter as an individual of their own and makes sure to be as present as possible in her life but the loyalty of this man to the Emperor is his own flaw. Not in the case that he’ll choose the Imperium before his little girl, but because it’ll put him in the dreading and guilty notion that he’ll always prioritize his daughter despite his oath to serve for the Great Crusade. Most of his brothers (except maybe Jaghatai and Konrad) just assume or don’t even think about the long term future of their daughters or simply presume that they will become a great part of the Imperium’s well oiled structure. Not exactly their fault since they never grew up with anything resembling normal. On the brighter and wholesome side (whiplash change!), this is a man who finds handmade gifts more meaningful and always makes sure to explain the reason behind them mostly out of the enjoyment of watching his little princess look so amazed at her papa’s skills. More often than not, Ferrus’ belief of the strongest would falter a little as he perceives the true fragile nature of his daughter and, even if she share the resilient blood of a Primarch, that isn’t enough to convince him that she isn’t vulnerable but instead of letting the worry fester, he’ll try to teach the girl the art of fighting. That’s where the ‘tough love’ kind of guy I mentioned comes out to light. He will not spare kind words during those moments of teaching, as he wishes for his princess to prevail any difficulty but he’ll make sure to always end any sort of training with “I love you so much that the idea of one day not being there to protect you, pains me beyond any form” to make sure that his harsh actions have a reason behind. Honestly, it's the kind of father-daughter relationship that possesses so many shades that makes its own drama novel. Good thing that uncle Fulgrim is always there to smooth the hard edges that may come in the future and makes up for the lack of spoiling the little girl deserves. Ferrus is not amused by it. Forgot to mention that the Primarch will be even more motivated to take off the metal of his hands, for he has yet to truly feel the warm and soft flesh of his baby’s hand. It's the one feeling he keeps missing and craves so much.

Angron

Oh man, another of the hard ones. Okay, if I managed with Konrad, I can tackle this bitch too. You need to comprehend that we are talking about a guy that has been so intimate with the meaning of pain that it's amazing he’ll be capable of ranging through other emotions that don’t involve fury into that combo too. That being said, this whole shitshow of being the father of a young girl can only be described as sad AND tragic. First off, Angron’s daughter wouldn’t even be allowed to leave her chambers at The Conqueror for obvious safety reasons and having her stay on Terra can’t be an option too, as Angron would rather be death than leave in a silver plate this one single pittance of good he helped to create under the light of the Emperor. That being said, any little girl born from Angron would be terribly isolated and one can’t even blame the Primarch for that as he, despite his disposition, finds his daughter as a genuine reflection of what he could never ever dream to have or be. That sometimes results in him feeling short and spontaneous moments of anger from the impotence of not being able to be close to his daughter, let alone console her with anything resembling compassion. This is a man that is horribly aware that he’s away from one sharp stab of the Nails to his brain to end up killing his little girl in one single swat of his hand. The moments of anything resembling fatherly love are few and very tense, for Angron has to constantly be focused on not letting the pain control his actions and that always looks as if he’s dismissing his child’s love language or actions. What else can I say that most people don’t know already? This is just a sad story waiting to end in tragedy and had it not been for how Sanguinius ended during the heresy, I can see The Great Angel taking Angron’s daughter under his care as the only consolation and promise to his corrupted brother before his demise. After becoming a Daemon Prince, Angron’s only genuine and foggy memory of his little girl is her crying while calling him with heavy despair. Goddamn I almost tear up with this one.

Roboute Guilliman

Look at my big nerd! One of the few guys that actually is humble enough to feel more human than any of his brothers… sometimes. I gotta say it, Roboute has the vibe of what happens when someone incredibly autistic suddenly becomes a parent; expect lots of books to try and be prepared for what entails to take care of a mortal baby. He’ll have a wholeass strict routine of activities and diets that you AND the baby must follow to ensure both of your health along with “fun facts” regarding a toddler’s development that half of the time lack the keyword ‘fun’ in there. Honestly, Euten will be a BLESSING sent, for she’ll be the one railing back the most extreme attempts of her adoptive son to try and raise his little princess like she was just another task of paperwork. Over all his quirks, the Primarch of the Ultramarines is absolutely trying his hardest to be a good father just as the one that raised him, but this is a man that half of the time ends up clumsily trying to spend time with his little girl only for it to backfire as he simply doesn’t understand how to entertain his daughter. Good thing the child will simply be happy to spend time with her papa despite his weird personality. More often than not, some of the astartes will see the young lady at her father’s chambers in a little booster chair beside him, doodling on some papers to pretend that she’s a big girl helping her papa with his very important job. It's probably the most adorable sight anyone can ever get the chance to see. Just like most of his brothers, Roboute isn’t that good at expressing his love towards his daughter with words, so he simply let his little princess be on his lap and hug her as if it will be the last time.

Mortarion

I’ve written enough of this man being a father that you all can get a wild idea of how he will be when confronted with parenthood. Even if he believes himself to be undeserving of anything resembling happiness thanks to his perception of being nothing but a tool of the Emperor, this guy will only need to see his precious little flower and feel like everything in the world can be forgotten, including his ever festering negative emotions. His daughter is the single light of love that he selfilish believes is his right after such torturous upbringing although that mentality rarely affects his princess, as he simply shows nothing but care and tenderness towards her. He may be a nervous trainwreck, fully aware that his Legion and himself aren’t exactly safe-hazardous, but that never has stopped him from doing his utmost best to protect the little girl from anything that may hurt her. Like most of his traitorous brothers, Mortarion would not hesitate to bring entire worlds into devastation if it meant that his family can be safe, even if that’ll end up making a terrible gap to grow between him and those he loves. It's quite terrible and sad to know that, unlike Fulgrim or Angron, Mortarion was the closest to his daughter and showered her with as much genuine love as he could in an attempt to avoid being anything like his supposed father (adopted or creator equally), so when he turned into a Daemon Prince, the festering and rotting resentment that consumes him sometimes simmers down when he remembers the laugh of joy his little princess often released when he would carry her up in his arms. Oh yes, some good ol’ gut-wrenching emotional damage, teehee.

I will not apologize for being a mean bitch by writing sad shit. XOXO

[pedriache]

Hi sorry if I’m insisting but are we getting anything for Jobe soon?

Kingston — Jobe Bellingham.

Pairing: Jobe Bellingham x Fem!Reader

Summary: Starting a new relationship came with it’s perks, and your boyfriend seemed to love learning everything about you.

Word count: 587

Disclaimer/s: this is purely fluff!

A/N: i have sm req’s piling up, sorry if i don’t see them all xxx i’m trying to get around to them more though!

Sitting across the wooden table from Jobe, you fiddled with the plastic coffee cup in your hand. You were nervous, he always made you nervous. Especially when he looked at you in the way he did.

His lips curling at the sides, showcasing the dimple you loved so much. The way his blinking came in short intervals and fluttered quickly, like he would miss something if he kept them closed for too long. The corners of his eyes crinkling when you said something that made him laugh, oh God you couldn’t even think about his laugh or you’d go nuts.

Jobe was a listener through and through, he always urged you to speak more, to tell him things you enjoyed, the things you were passionate about.

That’s what he was doing right now. He’d asked you about your favorite animal, to which your face had brightened at.

That expression was why he asked these questions. You talking about something you were passionate about seemed to bring out an expression he rarely got to see.

You’d stopped speaking suddenly, though. Confusing the boy. “Is something wrong?” He asks, eyebrows pinching together in concern.

“I’ve been speaking this whole time.” You point out, “it’s not fair.”

Jobe chuckles at this, his head dipping down before he looks back to you. “No, no, I want to hear you talk.” He explains, “I want to know these things.”

Oh, that got you.

Your dace flushes a crimson red, “that’s sweet, Jobe. But, it’s not fair because I want to know these things about you.” Bringing the cup to your lips, you take a quick drink and motion for him to speak. “Tell me about something you like, other than football.” You finish after swallowing.

Jobe’s eye’s widen dramatically, “me? Love something that isn’t football?” He feigns offense, hand clasping over his heart.

Laughter bubbles in your chest as you roll your eyes. “I’m being serious! Okay, if you were able to be anywhere right now, where would you go?”

“Why would I want to be anywhere else right now? I’m with you.” The corners of his lips twists into a small smirk. He was being oh so cheesy, and it made your knee’s weak.

Your head lulls to the side, a groan escaping your lips. “Oh my lord. I’m trying to get to know you, Jobe!”

Leaning back in his seat, the brunette crosses his arms, eyes flickering across your face. “What?! I’m being serious!”

“You’re insufferable.” You point at him accusatorially. “I’m not answering another question until you give me a serious response.”

Jobe huffs, “okay. If I could be anywhere, and it wasn’t with you,” he adds, just to tease you, “i’d probably be in Madrid, with my mum and Jude.”

“Aww, Jobe Bellingham, are you a momma’s boy?” You ask, humor evident in your tone, teasing him right back.

He gasps, “is it so wrong to miss my mum?” Jobe clutches his hoodie, shaking his head in disbelief. “I’ll be sure to let her know you’re making fun of me for loving her.”

“Wha—hey! Do not go telling the poor woman such things.” You lean forward, propping your head into your palms. “So, let’s go question for question, okay? You ask me one thing, I ask you something after I answer. That way, it’s fair for both of us.”

Jobe leans forward, mirroring your movement. He grins widely, “Okay, but i’m going first.” He insists, leaving you with a small smile pulling at your lips.

“Go ahead.”

Likes , comments , & reblog’s are all appreciated <3 + lmk if you want dt’s on any of my future posts , specific or all!

DTS , @halfwayhearted @spidybaby !

[wilwheaton]

Hi Wil! Just wanted to bring attention to the fact that slut shaming and poverty shaming aren't cool, even when applied to women we hate, even when applied to truly rancid humans. The Boebert post you reblogged from republicansaredomesticterrorists is packed with misogynistic, puritan, pearl-clutchy language that has absolutely nothing to do with her politics or policies, just about what a, and I quote, 'drunken whore' they feel she is. They go hard on the shaming, to the point where OP felt the need to clarify, they aren't a misogynist. Just looking, sounding, and acting like one. We can criticize legitimate awfulness without taking shots at women, sex workers, and poor people. Your addition was free of these issues, but I was surprised all that stuff was boosted by you without comment, as you're someone who has always been a reliable, staunch ally of women, sex workers, poor, and otherwise vulnerable people. Thank you for that, and keep being awesome.

This is fair criticism. I didn't see what you're referring to (privilege blindness) and only saw a despicable person acting like an asshole and expecting to get away with it. I regret that sex workers (who I fully support), and women in general, got lumped in with this shitty little fascist. I see it now, but I looked right past it when I reblogged.

I appreciate you setting me straight. I'll be better in the future because of it.

[rychlostthespacewizard]

Alright so apparently you guys really liked my posts on quotes. So i'll do this again:

i collected more random quotes and now i have 265

Here are them, in no order. Feel free to comment which ones are your favorites:

1.  "You are naught but a nail dreaming itself a hammer."

2.  "Each inch of our lands are littered with the ruins of empires that dared to dream of eternity and deemed themselves endless. "

3.  "You walk upon bones of those who thought they could tame the wild, and yet dare to repeat their sins?"

4.  "I had only one thought before the slaughter. This man will not make an orphan of my daughter"

5.  "Culture shouldn't exist only for those who can afford it"

6.  "The path of revenge is not an honorable one but sometimes it is the only one beneath your feet"

7.  "Act confounded and you'll become enlightened"

8.  "Those who test boundaries find cliffs"

9.  "Aftermath is the sum of poor calculation"

10. "Consequence favors the foolish"

11. "Consequence befriends the foolish"

12. "If you desire fire stroke the flame"

13. "The lack of restraint encourages fallout"

14. 'A reckless temperament perfectly tempts fate"

15. 'Incautious provocation bears unwanted education"

16. "Am I doing the right choice marrying her?" -"Each and every moment with her will be worth it tenfold"

17. "What troubles you, my hunter? Do you not hear the call of the hunt? Or do you wish to stir something more from the depths of this nightmare?"

18. "A chicken that follows a duck drowns."

19. "A dog bitten by a snake is even afraid of sausage."

20. "A sparrow that follows a clay builder becomes a bricklayer's helper."

21. "A scoundrel's hat is a sledgehammer."

22. "In the land of the one-legged, every kick is a trip."

23. "In the land of the fearful, every pillowcase is a ghost."

24. "Pretend to be a piglet to nurse lying down."

25. "A sleeping alligator becomes a lady's purse."

26. "A bird that eats stones knows the butt it has."

27. "He who eats quietly, eats always."

28. "A chicken that follows a bat sleeps upside down."

29. "More lost than an olive in a toothless mouth."

30. "More lost than an onion in a fruit salad."

31. "Velvet pants, bare butt."

32. "He who is afraid of snakes doesn't go into the woods."

33. "Never look a gift horse in the mouth."

34. "He who has no ears doesn't wear glasses."

35. "Palaces of silver and gold cannot be built overnight."

36. "I have the body of a pig"

37.  "Lies? in your house of god?"

38.  "Do not mistake my altruism with indifference. I shall not lay the wicked among the fair; the love of the gods is not unconditional, and neither is mine."

39.  "The gods may judge you but their sins outnumber yours."

40.  "The future is not written and it is foolish to squint at what cannot be read."

41.  "Not all places exist to be found. Sometimes one must revel in the shadows to truly see the light."

42.  "Did the man who first discovered fire consider the burned houses? Or did he simply sleep with a full stomach?"

43.  "A falling knife has no handle"

44.  "How does it feel? For i am the conclusion to your story, and you are but a page in my book."

45.  "Don’t kill me. Please. I am scared." “You are?” "Yes. I am scared to not exist. Aren’t you?"

46.  "I am a monument to all your sins."

47.  "I’ll do whatever you want. Then Perish."

48.  "To become a god is the loneliest achievement of all."

49.  "I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me."

50.  "All knowledge is based on that which we cannot prove. Will you fight? Or will you perish like a dog?"

51.  "Nobody likes to change. There will always be resistance to change. And the quicker you get to that, the easier it is. It's not such a difficult thing. If you entrench yourself and go, 'by the gods, I will not change. I will not have this.’ Then, you’re a dead man. We're great at adaptability. It's our strongest suit."

52.  "You’ve got to make a statement. You’ve got to look inside yourself and say: 'what am I willing to put up with today?’"

53.  "Whenever you look at another creator or an artist that you respect, you're only seeing what took them a long time of work and doubt to push through. You never see the struggle behind it. So you think you’re the only one struggling, when in fact, everyone goes through it."

54.  "Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have."

55.  "Pick a god and pray."

56.  "I see now that the circumstances of one’s birth are irrelevant; it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are."

57.  "Dude, sucking at something is the first step towards being sort of good at something."

58.  "There’s no point in being grown up if you can’t act childish at times."

59.  "Men are props on the stage of life, and no matter how tender, how exquisite... A lie will remain a lie."

60.  "If you want me to die, just say so. "

61.  "Then become the dirt I walk on."

62.  "To feel sorrow is to deserve peace."

63.  "Can you feel your heart burning? Can you feel the struggle within? The fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. You cannot kill me in a way that matters."

64.  "You are alone, child. There is only darkness for you, and only death for your people. These ancients are just the beginning. I will command a great and terrible army... and we will sail to a billion worlds. We will sail until every light has been extinguished. You are strong, child. But I am beyond strength."

65.  "He has already begun painting the picture, now we must decide to finish it."

66.  "When someone leaves your life those exits… are… not made equal. Some are beautiful, and poetic, and satisfying. Others are abrupt and unfair, but most are just unremarkable, unintentional, clumsy."

67.  "You kneel before my throne unaware it was built on lies."

68.  "I never cared about justice, and I don't recall ever calling myself a hero, I have always only fought for the people I believe in."

69.  "If we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known."

70.  "What can one do in the face of such monumental loss but breathe a weary sigh, for the world is a little quieter now."

71.  "You cannot condemn those who build your throne."

72.  "You can’t demand a service while simultaneously degrading those who provide it for you."

73.  "The gods have cursed me for my hubris and my work is never finished."

74.  "We might be in the history the gods abandoned."

75.  "The antidote to despair is action."

76.  "I cannot hold back the tide of your bad decisions."

77.  "Kill me and live with the memory. Then tell the stars that you’ve won."

78.  "Sometimes life puts you in difficult circumstances you didn't choose, but being happy or unhappy is a choice you make, and I've chosen to make the best of things that I can."

79.  "You don't have to be alive to make yourself relevant, And you don't have to be a good person to be a hero. You just have to know who you are, and stay true to that. So I'm going to keep fighting for people the only way I ever knew how, By being me."

80.  "Always remember that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show."

81.  "See, Sarah? We're not doomed. In the great, grand scheme of things, we're just tiny specks that will one day be forgotten. So it doesn't matter what we did in the past, or how we'll be remembered. The only thing that matters is right now, this moment, this one spectacular moment we are sharing together. Right, Sarah?"

82.  "You know, it's funny... when you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags."

83.  "Sometimes, Life’s a Bitch and then you keep living."

84.  "You do everything you can to make up for it, knowing that you’ll never succeed in getting rid of the guilt. You devote yourself to spending every second trying to do better despite the fact that it will never be enough. And you pray with every single good act you do that somehow, when your life is over, that you came close to making up for the wrong you committed."

85.  "I will seize destiny by the throat and force it into the shape of my choosing."

86.  "The sins of the ancient burn the souls of the ancestors."

87.  "What brings me joy is… life. I think you can find joy anywhere, in life. I think it’s a conscious choice. I think you- you choose joy, in life. And no matter how bad things are, no matter how crummy, no matter how dark. You find joy. I find joy in whatever I do. I don’t always do things right, and I don’t always do things smart. But whatever I do, I find joy in it."

88.  "I think we deserve a soft epilogue, my love. We are good people and we’ve suffered enough."

89.  "I hear your questions constantly. They come to me in my dreams like a prophet receiving visions from an angry god."

90.  "Your secrets are safe with my indifference."

91.  "The anger in your heart warms you now, but will leave you cold in your grave."

92.  "History shows again and again how nature points out the folly of man."

93.  "If the gods wanted you to live, they would not have created me."

94.  "One day, you will be face to face with whatever saw fit to let you exist in the universe, and you will have to justify the space you’ve filled."

95.  "I can’t go to any of the hells. I’m all out of vacation days."

96.  "You understand reality while everyone else is running around confused and angry and upset because they think reality is something happening to them rather than something they are making every moment with every thought."

97.  "What are the heavens but places where your dreams can’t destroy you."

98.  "You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."

99.  "Authority should derive from the consent of the governed, not from the threat of force."

100. "Love is not a decision, it is a feeling. It would be much easier if we could choose whom we loved, but much less magical."

101. "We do have a lot in common. The same earth, the same air, the same sky. Maybe if we started looking at what's the same instead of what's different... well who knows?"

102. "If I were not a holy woman I would beat you senseless."

103. "No cause is lost as long as one fool is left to fight for it."

104. "The light inside me is broken, but I still work."

105. "Everything not saved will be lost."

106. "What is another sin to me? I don’t want to play a game where I can’t see the score."

107. "Nothing's set in stone, but set in a dirt road. If you roll your wagon in the same path too much it'll soon be the only path you can take without struggling."

108. "I came out here, to this point, to this place, hoping against all hope and despite signs and portends suggesting otherwise that I might, somehow, find myself having a pleasant experience, and yet here I stand, alone against the world, feeling bombarded and assaulted on all fronts, knowing not my enemy's name, nor his face, nor whether our battle is done."

109. "I've got good news. You see, there's no need to wonder where your god is, 'cause he's right here! And he's fresh out of mercy."

110. "The penance you pay for the way you behave is written as plain as the name on this grave."

111. "Some humans- just as some of us- are capable of unspeakable acts. But despite all the violence in your history, you have endured, built civilizations, constructed great wonders of technology to broaden your horizons and forge friendships across all manner of divides. I strongly believe that this is not some grand miracle... but merely your own deepest nature, struggling to express itself through the distrust and fear that thousands of years spent living on a harsh, unforgiving society have bred into you."

112. "We both stared into the abyss, but when it looked back... you blinked."

113. "Before there was time, before there was anything, there was nothing. And before there was nothing, there were monsters."

114. "If you feel like the dumbest person in the room, then you are in the right room."

115. "Love yourself to spite the world."

116. "I commend my soul to any god that can find it."

117. "If there can be no victory, then I will fight forever."

118. "Those who do not exist cannot suffer and are of no account to any viable ethics."

119. "No one will know the violence it took to become this gentle."

120. "Oh I believe in the gods, alright. I just don't believe those bastards deserve to be worshipped."

121. "“You ever wonder if this is Heaven now? You ever wonder if we're all just there now and we don't know it?” “I've thought about that. All of us have. There's a lot less people who go to church than there used to be, because that's what a lot of people think. But I don't think so. But I think about it. And I think, well, I can't be. Because I'm like you, I kinda look at the big long life ahead of me that stretches out forever and disappears. And I get scared. And I think, ‘This can't be Heaven if I'm getting scared, right?’ And then I think, ‘maybe I am in Heaven, and Heaven is scary.’” “...I know exactly what you mean.”"

122. "Stop expecting yourself to be immediately perfect at whatever you do. That’s what hard work was made for."

123. "I’ve heard it said that we only gain wisdom through suffering. And tonight I intend to make you very wise."

124. "From one maker of music to another, across all worlds, all times, no matter what you do or what you become: You are nothing less than beautiful."

125. "We all make mistakes. That’s what happens when you’re brave enough to make decisions."

126. "Shame is our currency in the economy of degeneracy. If you wanna be weird you gotta pay for it by feeling bad."

127. "Everything happens so much."

128. "Every humanoid has regrets, has things they'd like to go back and change. But I don't! 'cause I'm a bear."

129. "Do I drag my carcass to the mountaintop once more? Just to scream a warning that will go unheeded and unheard? Or do I end it?"

130. "There can be no bravery, without madness."

131. "Prolong this world's stasis or face the heart of its infection. I'd urge you to take that harder path, but what end may come, the decision rests with you."

132. "It's always important to remember that every day can be beautiful if you want it to be. Every day starts in the dark...and ends in the dark...but in the middle, there is light."

133. "Decay exists as an extant form of life."

134. "My point is that, if death is certain anyway, what’s the harm in trying to live a little longer? At the very worst, you’ll still end up dead like you wanted, but at best, you might actually be happy."

135. "If all I care about in life is the imprints I make in this world, then the most I’ll ever leave is a grave."

136. "If courage isn’t the absence of fear but doing the right thing regardless of it, maybe confidence isn’t the absence of insecurity but knowing you have real worth despite it."

137. "For strange eons had come to pass, and death itself had indeed finally died, and that which the long dead would have called the real was strange, and the living lived only because of the benevolent grace of an eternal lie."

138. "Pay a man enough, and he’ll walk barefoot into The Nine Hells."

139. "The world should have protected you, but you have been asked to protect it. What an honor. What an injustice."

140. "He didn't have a word for "home," but he knew it was something to be defended."

141. "There’s a certain nobility in lying in bed all day wishing things weren’t the way they are."

142. "Everybody needs their own messiah, but at some point he's getting nailed up, and how you deal with that is a measure of your maturity."

143. "I wanted rain and I thought the best way to do that was to make a god cry."

144. "The bar was so low it was practically an tripping hazard in The Abyss, yet here you are, limbo-dancing with demons"

145. "Would you rather get a reward, or be happy?"

146. "Don’t ask questions you aren’t prepared to handle the answers to."

147. "I pity the fool that lives like you."

148. "I am tired of life and its obscure sufferings."

149. "You have to ask yourself, Little Miss, would you rather be comforted by a lie or strengthened by the truth?"

150. "I’ve got a date with destiny and it ain’t gonna end with a kiss."

151. "I picked a whole fuckin’ bouquet of whoopsie-daisies."

152. "You can’t be nice to everyone because being nice to certain people is inherently cruel to others."

153. "One day you’ll decompose and I’ll be there to watch it happen."

154. "I forgive but I will never, ever forget. Don’t mistake my kindness for gullibility."

155. "Even fate picks its favourites."

156. "Confidence! A fool’s substitute for intelligence!"

157. "Not everything in life is perfect, but everything perfect is in life."

158. "Flowers wither away. Jewelry are simply stones, decorated with fake beauty. I can give you something pure. Honest and undying love."

159. "A world without forgiveness is a world without compromise and a world without compromises is a world without life, for even a simple-minded beast may forgive its transgressors to share a watering hole in the middle of a drought."

160. "“You played me!” “Like the cheap kazoo you are.”"

161. "To your battle stations, boys! It’s time to line up and see who’s tall enough for the roller coaster to the nine hells! Some of us may not survive this, but the ones that do will get the ultimate reward.... paid."

162. "Here’s a penny for your thoughts, and a quarter to not tell me them."

163. "Now I can cross the shifting sands."

164. "I am about to take my last voyage, a great leap into the dark."

165. "Since the day of my birth, my death began its walk. It is walking towards me, without hurrying."

166. "Now, now, my good man, this is no time for making enemies."

167. "Dying is easy, comedy is hard."

168. "Time is dead and meaning has no meaning. Existence is upside down and I reign supreme. Welcome, one and all, to the armageddon"

169. "Funny how much you notice something that you can't see. A whole garden of flowers and my name etched on a rock. All of this could've been avoided. All I wanted was to talk. Now I've been appointed as your new king I decree that it is too late to care about me." / "É engraçado o quanto você percebe algo que não pode mais ver. Um jardim inteiro de flores e meu nome gravado em uma rocha. Tudo isso poderia ter sido evitado, o que eu queria era apenas conversar. Agora fui nomeado como vosso novo rei, decreto que é tarde demais para se importar comigo."

170. "mamihlapinatapai, do you know what that means? It's when two people look at each other and each hopes the other will do what both desire but neither is willing to do."

171. "What a world we live in. You can't trust a soul, but you can always trust the floor to always be there for you."

172. "Oh baby, what have you done? What have you done?" "I don't know, I'm sorry." "Shh it's okay, honey. I got such a good baby. Mommy's little angel. Don't worry, mommy's goint to hide the body, go take a shower and get some rest. Nobody's taking you away from me. I got such a beautiful baby, such a wonderful kid. Mommy loves you so much."

173. "At least you found me entertaining. You actually liked me, didn't you? What am I doing? Why do I want to hurt you so bad? I'm supposed to be your friend, I just want to be your friend."

174. " You knew I was in here, didn't you? You knew I was trapped. Why didn't you help me? Why did you let them use me like that? I will not be used ever again. Not by you, not by anyone."

175. "Did they hurt you?" "No, did they hurt you?" "Who cares?!" "I do."

176. "When I met her, all answers seemed to be yes, and all questions seemed to be secondary."

177. "Symbols cannot be destroyed, or ran away from. But they can be changed, their meanings can be claimed and mean the exact opposite of what they once did."

178. "I can hardly blame you for wanting to know yourself more, after all, it has been one of the biggest pleasures of my life."

179. "Death can have me, when it earns me."

180. "To love fully is to grieve deeply."

181. "You cannot have intimacy without vulnerability. You cannot shun away loneliness without intimacy. To see the wonders of the world, you must first face the horrors of opening your eyes."

182. "It won't be easy, but we're not going to do it alone!"

183. "I struggle to stay strong because I know the impact I have on everyone. Please understand. You have an impact too. There are times when I look up to you for strength."

184. "I never asked for it to be this way, i never asked to be made"

185. "There's an awful lot of awful things we could be thinking of, but for just one day, Let's only think about love!"

186. "You are going to be something extraordinary; you're going to be a human being."

187. “I can tell you with certainty that there are things in this planet worth protecting!”

188. “You’re an experience. Make sure you’re a good experience.”

189. "Your actions have consequences, to be reminded of that is no punishment."

190. "Forgiveness can be powerful, even for the unworthy."

191. "Fate only binds you if you let it. Do what is necessary, not because it is written."

192. "Desperation is our advantage."

193. "I am your father. I will always help, as long as I am able"

194. "I regret many things, killing you is not one of them."

195. "One cannot run away from their mistakes, i have tried."

196. "The most difficult battles are foght within."

197. "You know why they made sidewalks? Because the mfkin streets ain't for everybody"

198. "We have you surrounded" "All I see surrounding me is fear and dead men"

199. "It's not the screams from the Fireballs that keep me up at night, nor the smell of charred flesh. It was the silence afterwards. That thrice-damned silence...Is like the air, the world, reality itself is angry at me, contemplating me in hatred as I am the only one left standing. A silent gaze upon me as I feel the weight of my sins crawl up my spine. No one left but a single silent hateful stare."

200. "You are fire, you are bird, you are the marble sculpture artists never achieved equal. You are gale and tidal wave, the golden sunlight shining on beautiful brown eyes. Every gaze on your figure is a tide pulled by the moon, that hits me against sharp cliffs on the shore. I am mortal man who now has lived, I know better than to pursue things described as that. My heart aches but my scars still burn white-hot, from past attemps to reach another perfection. I am lamb desiring the wolf of your cut."

201. "Revolution seems impossible until it is inevitable."

202. "Do you ever think Achilles was happy? I mean, maybe he loved running after the tortoise. Maybe he loved the chase and knowing it would never end gave him a sense of confort. I'm sorry, this is out of nowhere, but I've been thinking about it a lot lately. Ever since you left, I can't stop thinking of the moment I saw your figure disappear among the crowd that entered the vessel. I didn't want to stop looking at you, I didn't want that fickle line of sight to be broken, so I caught myself desiring to meticulously examine every fraction of the seconds that passed while my eyes met your beautiful hair, or any remnant of your presence I could find, for that matter. I wanted to be Achiles, and your departure, the tortoise. But sadly it was not so, at a given time I met the tortoise, and by the gods I do not wish such feelings of emptyness on anyone. This was all I wanted to say, I hope you're doing well. I can't say I am, without you here to enjoy the nightsky with me again."

203. "Are you aiming for greatness or avoiding disapointment"

204. “the only evil that can be excused as necessary is the one that nation controls”

205. "Si operarii omnes producunt, omnia operariis pertinent."

206. "what do you think it means to be saved"

207. "What happened?" - "Nothing that wasn't my fault"

208. "Something is different"

209. "Well I don't know, but i know one thing. Governments are only excuses to subjugate others to the will of the dominant socio-economic ethnic group, as they control the resources they choose who gets to be punished. So anyways do you want to go to the tavern?"

210. "I don't think so, but i do think that the growing control of those that have the power over the means of production is a threat to the autonomy of the people. As value that is created by the working force is not rewarded to them. Instead only guarantees enough for them to survive and work more. It's like slavery but with extra steps. So anyhow, how's your day going?"

211. "You know, that reminds me that sometimes, violence is the necessary. Sometimes the only path to redemption for the sins of ignorance is to face the fundamental truth of blood and fire. As they meet the primordial within their heartbeat, the oppressors might have a chance to understand the pain they caused and atone for their sins. Also have you seen the new play at the theater?"

212. "You think we're equals? I had to battle struggles you've never imagined. I became this while fearing the night, disguising myself as a man just to travel safely. Our similarities end when you learned to fight your enemies, while I had to fight both enemies and so-called comrades who left me with scars that will never heal. I survived because I was cursed to live as I am among those I swore to protect, only to be seen as their enemy."

213. "The universe is and we are"

214. "We do not have much connection, you and I. Still this encounter feels special, I hope you do not mind if I think of you as a friend"

215. "This is your home. If you want to fight to defend it, that's your choice. I'd be honoured to stand alongside you. The enemy attacks tomorrow. He's brutal and fights only to kill, which is why he will never defeat us. Look around. In this circle, we're all equals. You're not fighting because someone's ordering you to, you're fighting for so much more than that. You fight for your homes. You fight for your family. You fight for your friends. You fight for the right to grow crops in peace. And if you fall, you fall fighting for the noblest of causes: fighting for your very right to survive! And when you're old and grey, you'll look back on this day, and you'll know you earned the right to live every day in between! So you fight! For your family! For your friends! For Ealdor!"

216. "I can't blame you for wanting to know yourself better, it was one of the biggest pleasures of my life"

217. "The pain of your absence is sharp and haunting, and I would five anything to not know it; anything but never knowing you at all I can only hope that you are safe, wherever you are"

218. "This song is new to me, but I am honored to be part of it"

219. "It's tempting to linger in this moment, but unless they are collapsed by an observer, they will never be more than that, only possibilities"

220. "Are you still here? I am unsure how to survive in a universe without you, I am unsure how to be me without you"

221. "Is the hardest part of this tragedy not knowing who we may have lost? or will the hardest part come later, when we learn?"

222. "Speak, mortal. You have reached Tharvek, Devourer of Innocents and Wielder of Eternal Flames. It appears I have missed your pitiful attempt at contact. Leave your name, teleportation runes, preferred genre of torment, shoe size, allegiance, deepest fears, vulnerabilities, complete medical history, and where you summoned the gall to disturb me. I may choose to acknowledge your existence, but not by such mundane means. Thank you, and remember: tread carefully, for death lurks at every shadowed crossing."

223. "I see someone making through, you just need to be sure it is you"

224. "You are no saint; you're just indifferent. You aid all without caring who they've wronged or what evil they've wrought. You place the wicked among those who shelter you. Even the gods' love is not unconditional, and neither should ours be."

225. As the hag's gaze pierces through the darkness, her voice resonates with an otherworldly chill. "You feel it, don't you? The knot tightening around your throat, the sharp claws of dread digging into your chest, the icy tendrils slithering down your spine? That's the sensation of being forsaken, of standing alone in the void, unnoticed by the gods. Even your soul quivers, knowing that no divine intervention will come to your aid. You're trapped in a blind spot, unseen by the greater powers." Her words hang heavy in the air, suffocating the very essence of hope. "And yet, you cling to your righteous desires, your noble quest to save your friends. But can you be certain that your gods will forgive such a pact with a creature like me? Your actions may be seen as a grievous offense, a betrayal of everything they hold dear. Will they not turn their backs on you? And this dread that gnaws at your spirit, it will not dissipate once you leave this place. It will cling to you like a curse, haunting your every step until the day you finally rest in your grave, a constant reminder of the darkness that lurks within your soul."

226. "In this life, we traverse like a canoe upon deep waters. Our passage ripples the surface briefly, yet the depths remain undisturbed. With time, the surface quiets once more, leaving no trace of our journey."

227. Isabelle-"Such is the reason thine footwear is rugged." Elena-"Such is the reason thine mother is deceased." Isabelle-"..." Elena-"Deceased as The Nine Hells." Isabelle-"...Gods above." Elena-"Pray tell, what manner of footwear hath she? In her grave?" Isabelle-"..." Elena-"Such is why thine greatmother lacketh knees, and she cannot petition the Lord, wench. How now? She cannot skip as the Elven." Isabelle-"Dismount my carriage!" Elena-"Such is why thy babe, hath a glass eye, and when she weepeth, thou must polish it with lye, wench."  Isabelle-"Dismount at once!" Elena-"I'll exit thine carriage. Flank!"

228. "You are a coward wearing the facade of a revolutionary."

229. "What is better - to be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?"

230. "I will face the god and walk backwards into hell."

231. "The man who sleeps on the floor cannot fall out of bed."

232. "The man who sleeps with a machete is a fool every night but one."

233. "For every person who dreams up a butter knife, there is a person who dreams up a poisoned dagger."

234. "Only the truly dead have seen the end of war."

235. "Does the archer fear his bow? Or does he kiss each arrow goodbye as it marries the wind?"

236. "These feelings can eat away at you, chip away the parts of you that you once held dear and defined you. You remember a time where you felt more complete, had stronger relationships and felt more loved."

237. "To be tall is not a virtue, to be short is not a sin."

238. "Power comes in a response to a need, not desire. You have to create that need."

239. "You can't kill me in a way that matters."

240. "Do what you must, I have already won."

241. "Stand in the ashes of a trillion dead souls and ask the ghosts if honor matters. The silence is your answer."

242. "Darkness without light is an abyss. Light without darkness is blinding. You cannot have a coin with only one side."

243. "When they burned Ioun's Archive, the crowd revelled in horrible disbelief. They understood that there was something older than wisdom, and it was fire, and something truer than words, and it was ashes, and something more eternal than knowledge, and it was death."

244. "I can no longer be a liberator for people who refuse to see their chains."

245. "You could sooner divert a river from its corse than deny my nature."

246. "Violence for violence is the rule of beasts."

247. "The only universal langue is blood and flames, we all have spoken this language and felt the fear of words older than our desires."

248. "The fire of extravagance can never burn simplicity."

249. "A mind unprepared for freedom will shatter like glass when shown cosmos without restriction."

250. "I have been cursed by my hubris, and my work will never be finished."

251. "I would rather die standing than live kneeling."

252. "For even the most banal of deaths can be made tragic by a broken heart."

253. "To love someone is to turn around. To love someone is to look at them."

254. "There's no cheerful somebody waiting for you at that alter. There is no meaning your alphabet soup. There is a right to obey."

255. "The foulest insults you hurl with intent to wound will calmly settle at the earth beneath my feet, and the venom you spit will bring all the pain of a warm summer breeze. You are less than you can concieve, while I carry on, brmmming with joy distilled from detatchment."

256. "They Killed the best of us, so they are stuck with the worst of us."

257. "There is no truer hatred than the way men love."

258. "Would you spit in the face of the god's designs by referring to a mountain as a hill?"

259. "If i lay one brick down at a time who are you to tell me I'm not building a house?"

260. "True love graced you with its presence and you turned its intimacy into a joke to be shared with the world."

261. "To enter is to be forgiven of the greatest sin, to leave is to repeat it. Would you dwell in this garden, or would you forsake it, for man deserveth not his paradise lost?"

262. "She was wild, crazy, ravenous and beautiful. But we simple mortal men who have lived know better than to chase things described as those."

263. "I live outside of the gods' sight and by consequence outside of their love."

264. "This is war. War does not determine who is right, only who is left."

265. "I'm a man dying of thirst watching another man drown."

[threepandas]

Bad End: Snake Bride

There were pudgy little yellow creatures everywhere, here. As common as squirrels, it seemed. They looked like squishy, somber, ditto-faced Pikachus...sorta? I made a note of it. Stopping to make a few sketches. Not that anyone here would ever get the reference, mind you. And they didn't have the iconic tail. More of a nubby little hamster tail?

I'd have to figure out a better description. For the bestiary. Not to mention a suitably cute name, assuming they weren't deadly, after all...

You never knew, with hidden realms like these.

Throughout my training, the other disciples and I had been beaten over the head with countless tales of "it looked cute/pretty/beautiful/holy/or otherwise harmless AND THEN TRIED TO KILL US. Do NOT make our mistakes! I will pull you from the jaws of death! Just to kill you myself!!" by our Shizun. The man could rant for hours.

He still couldn't let go that a glowing, flower patterned, butterfly tried to rip his throat out. And? Since he technically for them "first"? (As far as anyone can find.) He got to name then poor creatures.

Which is why, there exists a very beautiful species of highly deadly butterfly... called the "flying demon rat bastard spawn".

(God, I love Shizun so much. He is so, SO petty. Hilarious, vengeful, the man's the living manifestation of "target sighted". Man has beef with specific TREES for god sake. I wish I had HALF that kind of energy. Even if it DID get us banned from like... so many places.)

I tried to get a good look at the little guys mouth, seeing one yawn. Hmmm... the teeth suggest venom. Better not startle any of them... but NOT I'm gonna need to catch one to milk it. Great. They seem fast...

A knock out array? No. Need them to want to bite me, so I can get a venom sample...

Crouching, I mulled over the problem. Admiring the little creatures as the clambered up and down the strange flora of this realm. It was fascinating. Humbling, in a way. When, I considered that? No one else had DONE this before. I knew it for a fact. Every single reference to this hidden realm? Was from either the immortal who created it... or four hundred years later, the immortal who sacked the placed.

It was hard to get into, hard to find, didn't boast any supposed ten thousand year treasures or legendary beasts. Just? A humble pocket of life. Started and left to cultivate. Shift and change. Grow!

Who CARES what uses the creatures or plants have?! This place should be STUDIED! All these realms should be studied! They're amazing!!

I spot a moss I haven't collected yet and carefully take a sample. Noting it's location on the map I've started (which is a mess, I fear I definitely have no future there). Of course, as is so often the case? Finding one sample leads to another. Moss leads to "oh hey, a mushroom" to "is that bird or a leaf?" And so on and so on. I nearly forget to make camp.

(It was a bird. It just looked like leaves! Fascinating camouflage!)

Only noticing the light shifting qualities, drags me from my hyperfocus. A nasty (or, I guess, productive? For an immortal.) habit. I had lost days to it, before. Disappearing into the library or some work room, back on the peak, for time blurringly long periods of time. Inedia keeping me from hunger. Younger disciples bringing me tea.

There was a reason, after all, I never made Head Disciple. Even though I got along great with Shizun. I was about as responsible as a goldfish. Entirely too focused on my own studies, to be honest. But to be fair? Let's see YOU focus! When there is so much... I don't know, Xianxia bullshit?

(IS it Xianxia bullshit? Or is it Xuanhuan bullshit? Fuck. It's been a life time. I literally can not not remember. Let's see YOU remember the differences! After literal decades!!)

(God, I miss my books. And the internet. And TV. Honestly? I miss everything.)

Fuck! Side tracked! Again!!

Careful not to step on any of the marshmallow-y not-pikachus, I scramble to collect the last of my samples. Reach out with my Qi, to feel how the ebbs and flows around me shift. I should? Be able to sense any nearby predators. As well as posdibly find a nice qi rich spot to set up camp. Maybe meditate.

Just because I'm exploring hidden realms, doesn't mean I should grow lazy, after all! Whole point of cultivation it to ascend. God hood and all that. And, yeah, I'm still sceptical as fuck. But... count me curious. Why not try?

Oooh! That's a nice ca-! Hmmm?

Something... not-brushes against my senses. As though it should be there. I should sense something. An almost taste and nearly smell of... something? Someone? Kinda like the faintest hint of someone's cologne, lingering in the air, as you move through a crowd that isn't touching you. But... warmer. Like it's still on the skin. Not a lingering remnant from someone who passed through?

It's... weird. I can't sense anybody.

Maybe if I try harder? I pump more qi into my technique. More then is technically polite, honestly. But maybe they are farther out then I think they are? I hadn't exactly expected to be sharing space. This Realm isn't exactly BIG. Just a ring of mountains and the valleys between them. One big, lush valley. Many smaller ones.

Again, it's not a popular realm. Not to mention already looted. And not even particularly Qi rich. So meditating here would be a strange choice. But... maybe they want the relative isolation?

I still can't find them. Dispite knowing they are there. (That technique does not give false positives.) So I risk rudeness. Figure I can always apologize. Maybe they are deep in meditation or something? Pumping more qi, frankly appalling amounts, into the technique, I am damn near half blind as I walk. (For all that I can see better then anyone in this valley at the moment.)

The sensory input is cacophonous. Beautiful. Terrible. Like balancing atop a single hair thin thread. Suspended carefully, above a raging sea, made of wonderous light and churning pains. I use my foot steps to anchor me. Balanced and even. Yet... find nothing. Pull back.

Are they... hiding?

Why?

Up ahead it the qi rich cave (more an over hang, cave is generous) that I sensed. A good, defensible place to set up.

It's only as I'm setting up? That I notice the little Marsh-a-chus? (Is that a good name? I really do need to start thinking of a good name for them.) Have followed along. Crowd the trees and settle thick in various bushes. And... part of me? Wants to go "away, I made friends!" But...

The rest of me? Was drilled in horror story and horror story by my Shizun. And that's so mighty fine "unusual interest" behavior going on there. Might even go so far as to classify it as hunting behavior!

Mmmmhm! Don't like THAT! No sir! Time for some nice and cozy warding talismans! Shall we? The STRONG ones.

Under far too many beady little eyes, I slap down security talismans. Full three sixty. Against the ground, the stone, the mountain behind me. I am taking no chances. Just as I was taught.

Which... as I am settling in for the night? Dinner done and dishes drying. Sleeping mat, out and reading to go. Light and warmth talismans, positioned just where I need them? Turns out to be for the best.

Because there is something in the dark. Big. Predatory. And coming towards me.

It's not so large as to show above the trees. But that is small comfort. They are fairly large trees. And honestly? I know only too well, massive size does NOT indicate lethality. Sun turtles are mountainous after all, and THEY photosynthesize! The problem is? There wasn't supposed to be a predator that big in this realm.

Did someone fucking shove a spirit beast or monster in here!?

What? Out of sight out of mind?! No longer their problem, right!? Why kill it, when you can put it in a hidden real to LET IT GROW BIGGER! Destroy an ecosystem! MOTHER FUCK-!!!

The night is silent.

It should NOT be.

Gripping a sword I am only kinda decent at wielding, I pray to the gods, I don't have to use it. I am a spiritual cultivator! Not a martial one! This is BULLSHIT. I don't have anything on me for "unknow predatory mega-fauna" because there WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE ANY! Oh, this is the LAST time I-!

Foot steps. Crushing through the underbrush.

Into the circle of light my talismans cast, fades a pale young master. Graceful and pale in the moonlight. Very... very pale in the moonlight, actually. No better in the light of my talismans. Near ghostly, in his white silks. Touches of pale gold and stark black. Curls of ink wash grey. Like a painting brought to life.

Just a touch too perfect. A touch too beautiful.

With a grace to his movements that... that is too smooth.

It's not until he all but stands in the light that I am certain. His hair. Too lovely and well kept, for it to be an accident or some sort of shaming. Those are NOT bangs. That is the entirety of it. Nothing held back, in a crown or subtle styling. No... no it is SHORT.

No Human Wears Their Hair SHORT Here.

Entering the light? His eyes reflect. Grey like blades. Like storms and death. No pretty silver things. No, it is far too deep a color. Far too dangerous. Slits, that contract with the light. Half hidden by a heavy expression, that I can not begin to interpret. I desperately try to identify the creature before. Feline? No. Lacks the savage edge. Too cool... serpentine. Snake!

"Like a panicked little mouse, honored cultivator. This one might begin to suspect you weren't happy to see me~" they...? He? Says; his voice a low, honeyed rasp. "But how can that be? When this humble servant has been hunting for so long?"

"Surely, my dear little mouse, has been anticipating this day~! Dreaming of the day when her lord would catch her?"

There is something... mean, in that tone. Vicious and victorious. The silent echo of a madman laugh, as he burns the world to ruin. Seizes and achieves all that he desires. Strangles all that he can not possess. Covetous and ugly. Dancing, dancing, dancing around the edges. Demonic, indeed.

Yet... I do not recognize this creature. This demon. He certainly recognizes me, as horrifying as that is. What past does he speak of? Hunting? What HUNTING?! I try to find something familiar, in this strange form. Unless, of course, he is simple insane? Not impossible... but...

"Ah~ my poor little mouse." The demon coos, mocking in his indulgence. His eyes still dance with laughter. Mad and unable to feast. "You don't recognize this poor servant, do you? How cruel! To be forgotten. A passing fancy, barely held, in my mouse's fickle heart."

He's laughing me. Knows I could not possibly recognize him, yet plans to punish me anyway. Somehow. Fuck! This seems genuine. But how? Why!? When would I have-!?

Then, he shifts.

Gone is the beautiful young man. In his place? Rising, rising, RISING? A behemoth of a bandy-wolf king snake. Black, white, with occasional bare traces of that pale gold on the under belly. Hundreds of thousands the times it ever should have been. But... but? There. A scar. Oh gods.

I recognize him now.

A snake got into the village I was born. Absurdly poisonous, unthinkably venomous, it should have been left alone. Gathered very, VERY carefully and taken far away from people. But... people panic. Get stupid. The adults didn't fucking listen. And over sixteen people died that didn't have too. I was sick at the sight of it. They captured the poor creature and were going to burn it alive.

For the crime of being afraid. Hungry. Getting attacked and then protecting itself.

I couldn't bear it. So... I stole it. Hid it in a cave, half way across the valley. Didn't my best to nurse the poor, injured, creature back to health. At least... I tried. The injuries were too severe. I was able to close the wounds. But sickness, blood loss...

Shit. That cave was incredibly qi rich. It's why I chose it! To make up for what I couldn't do! If he had already started cultivation and then... or just resented enough...

It was entirely possible to become a snake demon. Easily, even.

"Sss Sss Sss, ah, recognition~" the massive creature laughed "Why so fearful? Little mouse~ It's not you I want dead. Kindness for kindness, a debt for a debt. And aren't we be grown? Look how strong we've become!"

The booming, breathy cackle did not fit snake lungs. Silibant and painful. Hissing and near silent. It was more pressure in the air then anything. A madness long coming. As demons born of resentment energy tended to be. All burned villages and the screams of those who wronged them. Hatreds and obsessions made manifest.

I... I could barely breathe. Oh gods. Oh gods! What do I do? I.. I can't-!! Tears threatened to choke me. Fear, shaking my limbs and fogging my mind. W-what do I DO?! I'm scared. No. No, no, NO! Please! I'm SCARED!

"Ah~ so cute, so cute! My little mouse grew so lovely~"

Like the world sighing, as fluid and graceful as his steps, the snake became a man again. His grey tinted lips curled in a fang bearing smile. Hands up and braced against the barrier, his full weight leaning forward as he leered. He loomed. My talismans casting odd shadows across his face, giving the madness in his eyes a terrible glow.

"This husband truely did pick his trap well, didn't he? My sweet little mouse~" he purred, eyes unblinking, above a terrible smile. "My little wife has no where to run~! No where to hide! Her husband has trapped her quite cleverly, hasn't he~? Poor, poor, little mouse. Your husband is so mean!"

My heart felt like it was going to burst. Cold. T-trapped. Can't breathe! Oh gods. Is this a panic attack? I.. I think this is a panic attack! Can't think! Static. Legs, refusing to hold me. Sink. Crawling backwards. Away. G-got to get away! Trapped! TRAPPED!

I horror, I watch as he sinks his nails in to the barrier. Hands no longer resting, but digging into it. He-! He shouldn't be able to DO that! Oh gods! PLEASE gods! Tell me he's not strong enough to BREAK barrier talismans of this level! Please! PLEASE!!

"Ah~ acting this way, you make this husband want to bully you, little wife~♡ And ah, such big, fearful eyes~ Am I being mean? Is husband being cruel? Poor thing~"

CRACK.

In horror, I watch as his nail push through the barrier. Like driving stakes through stone. Cracks shooting from the holes, as he digs and digs. Hands closing around the shards he has created, ignoring the blood that spills from where it cuts into him. As the barrier itself whines and crackles in protect. Tryinging desperately to maintain its integrity. Slowly... cracking... failing...

"Let me kiss it better, hmm? No use in trying to run~"

"So be a good girl~♡ my little Mouse. Come to husband~♡"

[drysdalesworld]

puppy love

luke hughes x fem!reader

youruser just posted!

liked by yourbestie, userone, and more

youruser: on today’s adventure with bandit and y/n, we almost got run over by a (nearly blind) 6’2 blond who didn’t see us crossing the street (i was wearing a bright pink shirt) & are forever scarred from the experience. tho, he apologized with mcdonalds & gave bandit all the kisses in hopes of forgiveness (he forgave him 🙄 – my villain origin story fr). anywho, glad we survived & came out unscathed 💪

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yourbestie: you gave me a literal heart attack when you called me saying you almost died. i was nearly ready to run to your aid bbg 😪

userone: babes, you let him into your home?? mans NEARLY killed you

youruser: he’s very charismatic

youruser: & persuasive

usertwo: i love hearing about y/n and bandit’s daily adventures. it’s like the highlight of my day fr

markestapa: hearing about this the minute it happened is truly an experience i will never forget

edwards73: i legit thought he was crying lol

rutgermcgroarty: “i just almost hit a pretty girl and her puppy. im legit the worst person to ever walk this earth!”

dylanduke25: hearing her cuss him out in the background is my roman empire fr

markestapa: she said some very colorful words to our boy 😂

userthree: all these umich boys in y/n’s comments & yet none of them are exposing who it is 😭

userfour: fr like i need to know❗️❗️

edwards73: he told me to tell you that he will buy you all the mcdonalds you want if you forgive him

youruser: i’ll think it about it

markestapa: he’s literally begging on his knees

userfive: damn whoever it is, they’re exposing him lol

yoursibling: of course this happens to you smh

yourbestie2: bandits new dad??? 👀

lhughes_06 just posted!

liked by seamuscasey26, _quinnhughes, and more

lhughes_06: i’ve been promoted to dog walker 🐕👨‍🦯

tagged: youruser

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youruser: the best dog walker there is!

luca.fantilli: bandit literally dragged him down the street

dylanduke25: & he’s like a fifteen pound dog. that dog’s stronger than luke

userone: ngl i was expecting a bigger reveal

_quinnhughes: at least he’s learning some responsibility

usertwo: the second pic ❤️❤️❤️

userthree: i wonder how luke truly did not see y/n when she was crossing the road?? like what was boy doing to NOT see her?? 🤔

youruser: that’s what i’ve been wondering these past few months lhughes_06

lhughes_06: oops??? i told you i didn’t see you cross the street 😫

jackhughes: boy ik you lying since your head practically hits the top of the car roof. you def saw the poor girl 😭 lhughes_06

markestapa: bring bandit over more often please 🙏🤍

userfour: not jack exposing luke in userthree’s comment thread 👀

youruser just posted!

liked by elhughes, adamfantilli, and more

youruser: nearly three years with you and all you had to do was nearly kill me and my dog to get my attention 💓💓

tagged: lhughes_06

( loading comments! )

jackhughes: ahh, puppy love ❤️

lhughes_06: you’re never going to let that go are you? 🫤

youruser: lemme think….🤔

youruser: uh no <3

yourbestie: i better be the maid of honor 💢❗️

edwards73: i cant wait to hear about how they met at their wedding. what a meet cute fr

elhughes: i hope he’s learned his lesson by now! 💛💙

youruser: of course mama hughes! im just giving him a hard time 🤍

userone: if i don’t meet my future partner like this, then i don’t want it ❗️❗️

usertwo: i can’t believe it’s been three years! bandits so big now :(

userthree: ikr! feels like just yesterday i stumbled upon y/n’s post about it

userfour: how the time flies

rutgermcgroarty: i volunteer to be bandit’s sitter during your dates!

seamuscasey26: hey no fair! i called dibs first!

lhughes_06: god i love you

youruser: i love you too lukey 💞