#i see a pretty cater and i tag you i am not sorry lol

[kirexa]

@overly-niche-twst

[amhrosina]

NSFW Alphabet (Matt Murdock x Reader)

MASTERLIST // JOIN MY TAGLIST

Read the Frank Castle Version

A/N: I have no idea what happened when I posted this earlier today, but when I came back after making the most delicious sugar cookies ever, it had been flagged and removed from every tag. Let's try this again!

Highly requested (so much so that I can't even respond to all of them because my blog would become one long nsfw alphabet matt request blog lol). Thank you to everyone who requested and sent me love about the Frank one! I'm feeling like maybe a Namor one next??

(Warnings: literally all the basic NSFW warnings you could think of, if you’re not into smut please don’t read this lmfao, no daddy kink, no blood/knife play, but almost everything else) 

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) 

Matt definitely wants to be an aftercare king, but let’s be real – he’s usually so blissed out by the end of it that you end up taking care of him. 

That isn’t to say you always take care of him – when he’s feeling particularly dominant, he’ll wreck your body, mind, and soul and then cater to your every need afterwards. 

Making you tea after he ruins you is his love language.  

Cuddles are an absolute must and I stand by that.  

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) 

THROAT!!!!!! If having a neck kink is a thing, Matt absolutely has that.  

He loves anything that has to do with your throat which includes (but isn’t limited to): choking, biting, sucking, kissing, and especially licking up the column of your throat when he’s about to cum. 

Your favorite body part of Matt’s is his eyes. 

He keeps those glasses on 99% of the time when he’s in public or with clients, but as soon as he’s alone with you, the glasses come off. 

His glasses are like a barrier between him and everyone else, but with you he doesn’t have to hide himself. You love that he trusts you enough to do this. 

Obviously, Matt is seeing-impaired, but sometimes you swear you can feel his stare at you from across the room.  

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) 

Are you guys ready for this one? Are you sure??? 

MATT MURDOCK LOVES CUMMING ALL OVER YOUR PRETTY FACE!!!!!!! 

Sorry, it had to be said. 

He tries to schedule these incidents around your hair wash days because he knows it gets in your hair and that causes more work for you, but sometimes he can’t help himself.  

He likes to swipe some of it off your cheek and make you suck it off his fingers.  

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) 

Matt secretly loves it when you go out of town or have to leave the city for a night or two, because that means *phone sex*!!!! 

I mean like he hates it when he’s apart from you, but he’s always a little giddy because it means you’ll call him from your hotel room for some fun. 

The sounds of your breathy moans through his phone speaker always makes him cum so hard.  

This isn’t necessarily the dirtiest secret, but Matty is a religiously traumatized baby boy and the idea of using such lude language when he talks to you really gets him going. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) 

Oh boy. Matthew Murdock is a dirty little manwhore and I am HERE FOR IT! 

He’s never left a partner unsatisfied, and he never will.  

The little hyper-sensitive hearing trick really helps him when he’s going down on you. When your heart rate picks up, he knows he’s doing something right. 

He could make you cum in 12 seconds flat if he really wanted to, but that man is a tease and will drag it out for as long as possible when he has the time. 

The king of delayed gratification and nights with at least half a dozen orgasms. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) 

Matt’s a simple man (lmfao), and he loves it when you ride him because he has unlimited access to your throat in that position. 

His absolute favorite thing is when you’re so worn out from the hours of sexcapades with him that you end up laying down on top of him, giving him full permission to fuck up into you with as much force as those juicy thighs allow. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) 

Matt isn’t so much goofy as he is excessively happy that he’s with you. 

He’ll have a dopey little grin on his face the entire time he’s inside of you (unless he’s feeling super dominant) and whisper the most exquisitely worded praises you’ve ever heard in your ear the entire time. 

The only time you’ve ever heard him laugh during sex is when Foggy walked in on the two of you going at it on his office desk. When you pointed out that he definitely heard Foggy walk in and just wanted to show off that he was getting laid, he busted out laughing because true, but also Matt wasn’t really paying attention to the noises around him. He just loves the sounds of your quiet moans so much. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) 

I’ve always questioned this because how does a blind man groom himself down there???? 

But Matt’s a pro because he’s Matt. He doesn’t like it to be too hairy, so he has a pretty regular maintenance schedule.  

He knows how much you love his happy trail so he doesn’t dare touch it, for fear of your wrath. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) 

Oh brother, Matt is so sentimental about it with you.  

He loves you so much and ensures that you know that every time he’s inside of you.  

Even when he’s being a dom, he can’t help the occasional gentle caress of your skin.  

Matt’s love language is touch, and mans was touched starved for so long, so the fact that he gets to touch you whenever and wherever really puts him in a grateful headspace. 

He can’t stop the praises from falling off his tongue anytime you two are together, and he doesn’t really care. He wants you to know how much he loves you, so he tells you every chance he gets. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) 

The whole delayed gratification thing puts Matt in a tough spot. On one hand, he’s always horny for you. On the other hand, the idea of getting to cum in you keeps him from touching himself until he sees you again.  

It’s not a daily thing, but during the weeks that you’re both busy and don’t see each other much, he may have some solo fun every once in a while. 

He’d much rather cum in/on you, so really this isn’t a big thing for him. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) 

You know this already but CHOKING KING KINK!!!!! 

That man loves one thing above all, and it’s your throat. 

It’s not even a conscious thought anymore. He’ll be halfway through fucking you into the mattress and realize his hand’s been wrapped around your throat the entire time.  

He’s a soft!dom and will shower you with praises the entire time.  

L = Location (favorite places to do the do) 

He’d gladly fuck you on any surface if that’s what you want, but he prefers his bed more than anything. 

The combination of the silk sheets and your kisses on his skin sends him into a state of euphoria. 

He also loves that it leaves behind your scent on his sheets. Our boy’s overly sensitive nose can’t get enough of your scent when you’re gone.  

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) 

Like I said 1 bullet point ago, Matt loves it when your scent lingers on his sheets or around his apartment.  

If you’re not in bed when he wakes up, he’ll roll over onto your side of the bed and bury his face in your pillow.  

His third leg makes an appearance shortly after this. 

Also, (obviously) anytime he has access to your throat, he turns into a feral little devil. He can’t get enough of you, even if he’s deep inside of you. 

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) 

Any kind of blood or knife play. 

Mans is traumatized by his old scars/wounds and would never want to inflict them on you. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) 

Matt is a generous man, and that doesn’t go away in the bedroom. 

If he could situate his tongue between your legs for the rest of his life, he’d gladly do it (with honor).  

Like I said before, he knows your body so well that he can make you cum with very little effort on his part, but he still likes to put in the effort because it’s you. 

All this means is he gives you multiple orgasms before he even thinks about himself.  

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) 

Matty’s a slow lover, and it drives you absolutely mental, because he’s so damn good at it. 

He could fuck you slowly for hours without cumming, all the while making you fall apart around him. 

Did I mention delayed gratification king??? 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) 

He’s not a fan, because it usually means he doesn’t get to fully satisfy you the way he loves to, but he’ll never say no to a quick fuck, ya know?? 

Lots of office quickies. LOTS of office quickies. 

He just looks so good in a suit, and you can’t keep your hands off of him when you stop by to have lunch with him.  

His greatest triumph (and his greatest shame lol) is the quickie you had in the bathroom of a church one time. 

You couldn’t stop rubbing your thighs together during mass, turned on by how wrong it would be to fuck Matt in a holy building. 

As soon as your scent his Matt, it was over for him. You’d excused yourself to try and clean yourself up, but Matt had followed and silently fucked you on the counter of the bathroom. 

He was clearly turned on by it too, but you were careful not to mention it when he was re-living any religious trauma he experienced. 

Matt secretly loves to think about it when he’s anywhere near the church. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) 

Your Matthew Murdock??? Risky??? Noooooo. 

Obviously, Matt is down to try anything with you.  

Getting a visual of Matt furiously searching the web for new positions to try with you. 

He hasn’t told anyone this but his goal for the New Year is to have tried every position listed in one of those sex books with you.  

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) 

Oh man, he could go for literal hours, and on nights when he has the time, he will go for hours. 

Matt is so disciplined with himself that most nights, he’ll make sure you’re absolutely spent before finally cumming in you. His orgasms are always earth-shattering, which is why the aftercare usually ends up being something you do, or at the very least, delayed. 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) 

Matt doesn’t need toys to help him get you off, but he’s always game to use them if you ask.  

One of his favorite things to do is call you when he’s leaving work and tell you to get started with your vibrator while you wait for him to get home.  

You’re allowed to get as close to cumming as you want, but you are definitely not allowed to cum before he gets there.  

He can pick up on the soft buzz of your vibrator from miles away, and the closer he gets to you the more eager he is to bury his face inbetween your legs.  

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) 

When Matty’s feeling particularly sneaky, he likes to tease you by almost making you cum a dozen times before finally giving in and making you cum.  

You’ll be a shaking, sobbing mess, begging him to make you cum, and he’ll just have a vicious smirk on his face as he pulls away from you.  

When you finally do cum, it’s so mind-bending that it takes you a few minutes to catch back up with reality. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) 

Matt’s usually so busy praising you that he doesn’t really have the breath to make other noises, but on the nights that he does, it’s magical. 

The soft grunts he breathes into your ear is so sultry that it alone could probably make you cum. 

When you get the rare chance to tease him, the whimpers he lets out are heavenly. You like to stretch these nights out because his whimpers are like music to your ears. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) 

Matt likes your hair a little on the longer side because he likes to tangle his fingers in it and pull on it when he’s fucking you raw. 

One hand in your hair, the other wrapped around your throat, and Matt Murdock ascends into the stratosphere. 

He can’t imagine a better way to spend his time.  

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) 

Whether Matt actually has a big dick or not, he for sure has big dick energy. 

The game that man has puts everyone else to shame.  

But we all know he’s huge. Like I just know his dick is big. It’s not even a theory, it’s a fact, and I stand by that. 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) 

Matt is insatiable for one thing, and that’s you.  

He wants you at all hours of the day, and on the days that both of you are off work, he’ll spend the hours fucking you slowly. 

(If you have a uterus), it’s a miracle that you aren’t pregnant by now. Even with all the precautions, it’s a god damned miracle. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) 

Sex doesn’t put Matt to sleep, so if it happens at night, it’ll definitely be a couple hours before he’s tired enough to fall asleep. 

He usually uses this time to patrol Hell’s Kitchen (if he knows you’re safe and taken care of). 

Tag List:

@xleiaorgana @mukbee @soft-emo-enby @purple-amaranthe @kokoterainonago666 @blackwidownat2814 @minervadashwood @emiemiemiii @h4rrys @messymissy @mylifeispainandiloveit @mossexe @alina02 @spikedhe4rt @fictional-hooman @thedevilwearsblack @merleisapartygod @legocity2 @violet-19999 @quackson03 @certifiedhunter @shoxji @layazul @alexxavicry @hallecarey1 @km-ffluv @chiaraxtargaryen @trulylavandedarling @D0wnbad @deliciousfestsalad @lilyevans1 @imagineadream @22carolina08

If your name has a strike through it, tumblr will not let me tag you for some reason. This could be caused by something in your settings or possibly a spelling error on your form (I copy and paste directly from that). Please look over your settings/form and message me to see if that fixes the issue! Thank you!

[stormears]

Questions 1-77 of the writer ask game >:]

Jammie decided to MAKE my night and ask me to answer every damn one the 77 Fanfic writer questions. I assume tumblr will automatically add a readmore thing to make it not be a Bible-length post. But I’ve got 15 years of fanfic history to go off of and I can ramble like nobody’s business when I’m typing.

But if you have any interest in my fics, maybe scroll a while and stop to read 2-3 of my 77 answers hmmm?

Also I shudder to think how many tags this is going to pop up in because of the ships I name here and there, sorry strangers lol

- 1) Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi-chaptered fics?

I thiiiink I prefer to write oneshots because they take a shorter amount of time, meaning a few months instead of multiple years. Because multichapter stories almost always take me fucking years. And my oneshots are still extremely long and big time commitments to write. The last oneshot I wrote (JJK, gofushi) was 25k and took a little over two months and god I SLAVED over it…

2) Do you plan each chapter ahead or write as you go?

There is always at least a rough plan in my mind, if not written down in an outline or notes document somewhere. If I don’t know what is happening in the upcoming scene, I am not writing.

3) Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic

I see a vision in my mind of Character Doing Thing or Characters I Ship Doing Thing Together. I create a universe that exists only to create the circumstances where they can do that thing. However even if I just want a sexy or weird af ship scene, I STILL want their to be plot elevating it all. I often struggle to tie together a plot that makes sense and isn’t fucking stupid but still caters to my stupid preferences and kinks. It’s like trying really hard to mix oil and water.

Practically, I write down all the plot beats, ideas and important bits I can think of into a Scrivener document, maybe scrape it into an Outline ish thing, and then start writing. Before Scrivener (up until end of 2021) I wrote stories in Word. And either had a separate Word document for the story’s outline/plan, or just kept the outline in my head.

Oh yeah I also have a pretty notebook from Target with roses on the cover and soft pink pages, where I write down a VERY general outline of the story or late plot beats/important things to remember to use. This isn’t as helpful or as long as the Scrivener version but I LOOOOOVE having a physical bite of my fanfic vision, seeing it outside of my head or the internet/laptop screen. As of end of 2022 I discovered I looooove writing things in journals!

4) Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

Imagination, music, books I read, movies, etc. Like everyone else I guess.

5) Do you like constructive criticism?

Fucking YES!!! I feel a tiny bit of resentment that fanfic comments seemingly have to be glowing praise all the time or you shouldn’t say anything at all. Good concrit isn’t about your preferences, but how well the scene accomplished what it set out to do, and why or why not. You can give concrit to a tentacle fucking scene and give the author advice on how to write better tentacle sex.

But the author of course reserves the right to either absorb that concrit and keep it in mind for next time, or just say/think “That person’s concrit makes sense, but I like the way I did it here because it’s hotter to me and I just like it this way so I’m not changing.”

6) Do you have your work beta'd? How important is this to your process?

Lmao no. I mean once, but lmao never again. I’ve never wanted a beta, I am my own editor and in my experience (reading my stories after posting) I generally don’t have typos or grammar to fix anyway, I catch them successfully myself.

HOWEVER…one time in 2019 I decided to try a beta for a Haikyuu fantasy AU story whose plot beats I was having a lot of trouble pinning down. I asked around on Reddit and only one person offered and I felt fed up with the story and irritated enough to just accept them, grateful for their willingness and time. The person offered next to no advice on the plot and instead corrected grammar that was wrong as a stylistic choice (little kids’ speech) and nothing else.

In exchange for their beta services, I had promised to review a story of theirs. So I read their FFN story which was a Naruto fic featuring a Kakashi crackship. I enjoyed their creative exploration of that ship but was flabbergasted to find their writing was. Um. Not that good. I mean down to seriously using “orbs” for “eyes.” That cliche was still alive in 2019 thanks to this person. It really felt like a teenager’s fic from 2008 but it was only a year old or so and they said they were 26.

I found things to compliment in their story and then happily ghosted them. No betas for me ever again.

7) How do you choose which POV to write from?

I usually write ship fic and I usually write from the POV of the character in the ship that I like more lol. Even if it’s a plot heavy fic and there’s little to no romantic or sexual scenes or vibes or whatever, if the ship is present at ALL that’s how I immediately arrange the plot/POV in my head. So I guess it just boils down to favorite character bias.

However I am toying with the idea of writing a JJK fic featuring a creepy problematic yandere character and usually such fics use the POV of the Object of Affection so you can feel the oppressive weird sexiness coming out of the screen at you. But this fic will be written from the yandere’s POV instead of my fave’s, so you can see their crazy af animal-like thoughts when their love interest runs away/goes missing which sets the plot in motion. The story is about finding that MC in a cyberpunk city, so hanging with the yandere the whole time who is forced to put themselves on a leash and solve a mystery facilitates the…mystery vibe of the story.

8) Do you prefer the beginning, middle, or end of a story?

Hmmm difficult to say because for many of my multichaptered fics I don’t even make it to their endings…again, it takes YEARS sometimes. One of my greatest fics, a MadaSaku dark fantasy au called Chasm, started in 2015 when I first had the idea, I didn’t publish Chapter 1 until 2018, it currently is sitting at 6 chapters, with C6 being posted on fucking January 1, 2021. It’s not even reached “the middle” in my opinion.

I guess I prefer…the beginning? I love setting up the intense stakes and unknown factors and threats and suspense that doesn’t yet have answers…very tasty…

9) Do you comment on stories you read?

Fucking yeah I do you want to see my post with MANY screenshots bragging about how I carry 95% of AO3 readers on my back and support the fucking economy???

I don’t tell people on twitter what my AO3 is (because I rarely talk to people on twitter and when I do they fucking ignore me anyway!!! :D) but there’s 3 separate people on twitter who have made gushing tweets floored by the length and interest in my comment. I kept those screenshots too and ahhh it feels good.

10) Cltr+f "blinks" on your WIP & copy paste the first sentence/paragraph that comes up

Nothing came up. Maybe because I don’t write in present tense. Not really a fan.

11) Link your three favorite fics right now

Uhh I’m not sure I have favorites, these are the ones that came to mind. I don't keep bookmarks on AO3 so I don't really have a "favorites list" and these aren't necessarily recent just the ones I wanted to mention...

1) “Shard Society.” Haikyuu mystery crime drama about Oikawa being murdered just before high school graduation, Iwaizumi is arrested and jailed for it. Eight years later, law student Kindaichi discovers a recently written confession from seemingly the REAL murderer and is on a quest with youngest prosecutor in Japan, Sakusa, to find out who did it.

I followed this story for over a year, gave a few dozen MASSIVE comments to the author who always giddily replied to me. They also expressed their gratitude by sending me a physically published copy of it in the mail!!

2) “He Had No Fingers”. I’m gonna go for oldie fics now lol. This is a horror Naruto fic about Kyuubi being an eldritch monster, with deadly serious and ominous prose. The story makes it pretty clear that it will absolutely take over and consume kid Naruto and the whole world, in time. I remember passages describing like how the Kyuubi is its own dimension, and speaking aloud even the names of its body parts will turn its attention to you and make you explode.

When I first read it in like 2010 or something it actually made me light-headed. I remember the story described the Kyuubi as smelling like chitin (what bug exoskeletons are made of) and I somehow thought I could…smell chitin when I was reading. I remember sitting on my bed reading this story and SMELLING something I never had before. And never did again.

3) “Lapsus Memoriae.” This is an OG cartoon Transformers fic. I watched a bit of the cartoon as a kid but I don’t even go here fandom wise lol, I forget how I even found this…maybe in 2008 ish when the Michael Bay movies were new, because I was kind of into those as a teen?

ANYWAY THIS IS TRANSFORMERS THREESOME SOULMATE AGE GAP YAOI, AMNESIA AU! Medical autobot Ratchet and his 2 friends wake up at headquarters missing the last several years worth of their memories. None of them remember their respective “bondmates”. The main character is Ratchet, a prickly, older medical bot whose bondmates are a pair of hot, sexy young twins named Sunstreaker and Sideswipe.

The other 2 ships get attention too, but high school me was sooooo into the twins being clingy and protective over their beloved angry old medbot uke Ratchet. 5 stars, still a fun read despite never being completed.

12) how does receiving or not receiving feedback/support impact you?

Not…much? I feel like I “write for myself” a little more than the average person bc I’m uhhhh arrogant I guess. Low feedback generally does not bother me because I love my story more than anyone else ever could. I always spend WAY more time re-reading my own stories, sighing in appreciation at my own hard work and prose, than I do re-reading people’s comments about it.

13) what’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

Write what you want to read. That’s what I’m always doing. I can’t think of any other common tips besides “Write what you know” which I don’t follow nearly as strictly. One wip right now is a fantasy/comedy MatsuHana in a society where gardening is mega-popular and culturally important and I didn’t know jack shit about gardening or flowers, etc., I was googling plenty of basic information to try and make the characters sound like they weren’t total beginners.

14) how do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

I’m not too sure how to answer the first one. I try and write them…realistically? Keep their emotions in mind? I try to remember that a character feeling intensely emotional will probably be too overwhelmed to properly/fully explain what they’re feeling or doing. So I’m careful with my word choice. No, I don’t feel what they feel. I’ve seen people say they get emotional/teary eyed themselves sometimes writing what their characters feel, that has never happened to me.

Do I draw from personal experiences, I don’t think so. The reason I write a fic, or the scene I want to get to, or the point of a story, is never based on something I experienced, just a cool idea I want to see. I've always kinda disliked the idea of projecting yourself that blatantly into a story. That’s not why I write.

Well shit I just thought of a new Haikyuu fantasy au I’ve got cooking where the villain is an OC whose backstory is basically that she’s a sad, bitter, loser failure and doing antagonist stuff out of resentment. That fit the plot I wanted, but I realized later a lot of her life is reflections of what happened to me when I felt like a sad, bitter, loser failure in life. She’s like…30% me. And that feels like a fucking LOT, I’ve never done this with a character before, it feels like…invasive or insulting or something but I’m going ahead with it.

15) How do you write smut scenes? Do you get very visual or detailed? How important is it to be realistic?

I’ve written very few smut scenes because I’m a coward and don’t much trust my ability to write them well. The couple of times I did took a looooot of work though I ended up liking them okay. I thiiiiink I’m ace and I rarely actually want to read characters having sex. A lot of the time the idea…bothers me somehow? I’ve got my own hangups with sex both irl and in the silly fandom world. Like I remember there was a #Whore(character)week on twitter where big fans of (character) wrote/drew him being a total cockgobbling passed-around-the-room slut, and I liked a little of the content but later felt so angry I had to mute the tags bc he’s NOT a whore don’t fucking insult him, he would NOT act like that in a million years, stop it stop being mean to him etc

Anyway realism is fine up to a point but I’m not here to read about realistic sex, usually, it’s fantasy sex where nonsensical things can happen and be portrayed as appealing. If realism doesn’t facilitate the hotness, then out it goes.

16) How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

Lots…too many…I’m angry and despairing at how many ideas I have and the fact that I’m slower than almost any fanfic writer I know, so many of my ideas are doomed to never manifest or will manifest and then sputter and die before completion. I’m sad about it all the time. This is my favorite hobby and I can almost never do it at a level where I’m truly satisfied.

Anyway one of my ideas is a Haikyuu fantasy AU where Kageyama is a fantastic mage but a shitty person no one likes and he manages to capture a talking unicorn (hinata) which are hella rare, but he seriously injures the prince (Daichi). So as punishment he’s forced to tame the unicorn for the crown, and if he doesn’t he will be kicked out of the mage guild, which will ruin his life as he’s not good at anything but magic, it's his volleyball equivalent here.

He befriends Hinata the unicorn and accidentally does a spell that turns him human a la the Last Unicorn. Then other unicorns come to humanville to rescue Hinata and Kageyama gets embroiled in unicorn politics and there are many unicorn OCs based on horses I have in a racing game called Rival Stars omgggg I fucking love unicorns horses yadda yadda

17) What do you do when writing becomes difficult? (maybe a lack of inspiration or writers block)

A majority of the time I wallow in self-pity tbh.

When I make myself be constructive about it, I try to write another story which can sort of unstick my writing gears by writing in a new way/new tone for that story. Also, reading helps a lot. Reading interesting ideas and good prose is GREAT for greasing the wheels in your head and reminding you what good writing looks like.

18) Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

I LOOOOOOVE COMING UP WITH TITLES! This is my way in which I’m Not Like Other Girls, I hear this so often among fanfic writers that they don’t know wtf to title their story, not me baby!! I love cooking up a new title and to me it’s a very important part of the story process. I usually decide the title very early on, if not before I even start writing!

My titles are usually phrases I make up that sum up the vibes of the story or point to a very significant event, the kind of thing that would “be on the cover of the book” you know? EX:

CHASM - Naruto, MadaSaku dark fantasy au. Mostly named for a point in the story where Sakura looks across a huge literal chasm and sees…something on the other side that changes her forever ;) Also points to Sakura’s deteriorating mental health due to surviving an attack on her home where many residents were killed by monsters

THE SUN ON JAKKU - Star Wars, Reylo fic I’ll probably never finish. But it was about Kylo Ren invading Rey’s mind and seeing her entire horrible childhood on Jakku. Even though only hours pass irl, he is present in her memories like an invisible ghost standing nearby and experiences those years alongside her. And over time becomes obsessed with her. His gaze is “the sun on jakku” that watches over her every day.

DAY OF THE NAVIGATOR - Haikyuu, Oiiwa space/sci-fi horror au. Aliens arrive on earth and destroy it, lone astronaut (called “navigator” in this fic) Iwaizumi barely escapes in a little ship but is pursued for YEARS through space by sexy alien Oikawa (+alien wolfpack Seijoh) who totally wants to fuck him and put an alien ring on it but Iwaizumi assumes the aliens want to eat/kill him. Iwaizumi keeps himself together with his navigator training, which stresses that your work “today” is the only day that matters. Also gives significance to the moment Oikawa finally breaks into the ship and hears Iwaizumi speak for the first time. He says “Today is it for you,” and alien Oikawa is so fucking turned on

19) What is the most-used tag on your ao3?

I think it might be Possessive Behavior or Obsessive Behavior? Yeah that’s been my fanfic food of choice since high school haha, some things never change. I just get better at dressing up my creepy ships in cool plots to make them feel less cringe.

20) Have you noticed any patterns in your fics? Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?

I definitely prefer fantasy AUs. Worlds with magic and mystery and cool places to go adventuring in, and scary but sexy monsters who can hunt down the protagonist in an open World(tm)

I’ve tried to search for common word choice or expression in my fics, tbh but I either never found any or just can’t remember.

21) Would you ever collaborate with another writer for a story?

I don’t think so. I don’t like the idea of ceding over control of my story to someone else. And if it’s a story we made up together so they “had control” over some of it in the first place, I’d automatically be not that interested and committed because it’s not fully mine. And I want it to be mine.

22) Are there certain types of writing you won’t do? (style, pov, genre, tropes, etc)

I don’t really do present tense. Can’t think of a fic where I have. I vastly prefer past tense. And I’ll probably never touch the following tropes because I hate them and think they’re stupid: Fake Dating, There Was Only One Bed, FWB.

23) Best writing advice for other writers?

Just write what you love. Even if it doesn’t really make sense, the plot doesn’t really come together, something about it doesn’t “vibe”…if you love it, that is all that matters.

24) Worst writing advice anyone ever gave you?

I can’t think of any writing advice that was outright stupid or bad…then again I don’t ever look up writing advice. I’m sure I have room for improvement much as anyone else, but I usually like the way I do things.

25) What fic do you wish you got more of a response on?

Ehh I guess my AtsuHina sci-fi horror au, The Abandoned City of Saint Winona…though I knew it wouldn’t get much of a response, because AtsuHina is such a sunny, cute ship, I don’t think most of its fans are the type to want a story where Atsumu is a disgusting maneating, shapeshifting alien who says he loves Hinata but the narration leaves it unclear if he means it or will eventually eat him.

But man I put a hell of a lot of work into that story, when I first posted Chapter 1 in 2021 and this past July when I scraped together Chapters 2 and 3. It was the first time in a long time when I wrote something where I knew the audience truly was me and MAYBE 3 other humans on this planet. Most other things I write do have a ship audience at least. And yet I wrote 35k...for me :)

26) Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

Oh Jesus, “Darcia” all the way…2019 OiIwa fantasy au that I only wrote one chapter of (BUT I STILL ADORE IT) I wrote/started no kidding THIRTEEN drafts of that chapter… Because I couldn’t decide certain plot points or WHY certain things would happen, I just couldn’t get a vibe I enjoyed…I toiled over this for a huge chunk of 2019, this is the story where I had that stupid useless beta on board for a bit. I actually seriously cried about this story a couple of times…

After fighting like hell and nearly eating my own skin I FINALLY posted the chapter, and took a day off work to celebrate…only for my mi litary boss to text me at 11am that day and say “Hey you know your yearly fit test was coming up next month, can you do it next week instead?” which fucking RUIIIIINNNNED MY DAAAAAAAY

27) What is your most and least favorite part of writing?

Favorite: when I end a successful evening writing session only because I am falling asleep, and I’m thinking “dammit, I could have written more!” I’ve found that many times, when I get lucky and pump out a huge word count in a session, I ALWAYS think to myself “dammit I could have gotten even more!” So even having that thought is itself a sign of success.

Least favorite: scraping my way through the dialogue for an important scene that moves the plot forward. Finding ways for characters to properly elaborate wtf is going on or needs to happen, in words that make sense for that person to say. If I get stuck on a fanfic, it’s EITHER because…I can’t make a decision about a HUGE plot beat, or I can’t fucking write the conversation that makes the scene go.

28) On average, how much writing do you get done in a day?

Oh geez…not a lot…I spend far too much of my life not writing because I’m busy with work or family obligations…but when I DO write, it’s maybe 400-500 average? Plenty of 200-300 days…Here’s my little wordcount log from when I was writing the AtsuHina sci-fi horror fic last month, like when I was really slaving away at it.

This makes me look better than usual, I think. I AM NOT USUALLY THIS ON TOP OF IT

7/17 evening from at least 700 7/19 - 1195!!! Though 160 are not being kept 7/22 - 1500!! 7/23 - 720 7/24 - 100 if that… 7/25 - 251…sleepy after post-dinner treadmill… 7/26 - 700 exactly! We’re at THE SCEN!E 8/5: 531 (well 731ish but deleted 200 ish) 8/7: 845 words 8/8: 1425 words 8/9: 742…getting closer…the narration doesn’t sound great though… 8/10: 1154. My god maybe this weekend will be it…

29) What’s your revision or editing process like?

I usually edit as I go. At the end of finishing a chapter, I will do a read-through that’s a little deeper than a “skim”, where I fix any spelling errors, tweak any word choices I was on the fence on originally, etc. Usually, after I finish a chapter, I will be posting it one or two hours later. I don’t usually wait.

30) Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished?

Wait until it’s all polished. Maybe this sounds contradictory to the answer above, but by the time I reach the end of the chapter, everything above it has already been combed through/edited along the way many times. So when I finish off the last scene, it’s already pretty well polished.

31) Do you start with the characters or the plot when writing?

I start with the plot because setting that in motion in the right way, and starting at the right time in the plot’s timeline, is ultimately more important.

32) Name three of your favorite fanfic writers.

Time to out myself as a toxic loser bitch but the two authors who come to mind as favorites, whose works I SO admired and enjoyed (and followed them both on other social media so I saw some of their irl happenings too) are also the two people I got the most pathetically, hatefully, despairingly envious over in all my life. They happened a few years apart. But my jealousy lasted months for one of them and YEARS for the other. People would point and laugh...or maybe just not know wtf to say...if I actually admitted how deeply my envy of those two writers affected me.

I swear on my life I don’t have jealousy problems in any other avenue of life…it’s JUST fanfic writing, the hobby that I most care about and that gets more of my passion and soul than anything else I do. I basically stepped away from their fics and decided to not look at them anymore. And even though I truly adored their works, I’m kinda scared to ever look at them again. In case it turns out I never got over it or the bad feelings just flare right up again. I don’t want to feel that way again. Sorry. Next question.

33) Do you want to be published some day?

I actually drafted 10 or 11 chapters of a fantasy YA book when I was in high school but that desire to be traditonally published faded a lot during college. I realized I like fanfic writing much more than original fic writing and don't really want my irl peers reading my work. But I did also write a shitty “book” in middle school that was 120 pages on Microsoft word about talking dragons, totally plagiarizing plot points from Majora’s Mask and Princess Mononoke.

And the YA book was about people with wings living in floating cities in the clouds. The MC’s little brother fails the Rite of Passage flying test and falls to the earth, so MC and Love Interest dive down to see if he survived and find him (a forbidden act!) and find out Earth is a nearly dead wasteland with gross monsters and some wingless dragons. The dragons dream of making it to the floating cities and conquering/stealing their resources. They hang out with a wingless dragon who barely tolerates them and carries around his extremely weak, almost-totally paralyzed little sister dragon on his back.

34) Five years from now, where do you see yourself as a writer?

I’m sure I’ll still be writing, and I’ll still have SOME of the same fandoms I do now, because fandoms last years and years for me. I’m still a bit into Naruto and read fic of it now and then despite it being over for nearly a decade. I hope I will have finished some stories by then! If I have, I might pursue my half-hearted dream of getting a physical copy of my fanfic published hehe! But I’m greedy and would only do so if I could somehow find a fic binder who’d make it to my totally extra expectations (gorgeous commissioned cover, black pages with white text for the first page of each new chapter, probably Garamond font…sprayed edges ahhhh)

35) What is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain?

They see themselves as a “protaganist” and will deal with “antagonists” accordingly.

36) How do you write kissing scenes?

Depends on who the characters are. I guess I’m usually writing characters who haven’t kissed very much or at all, or characters who at least haven’t kissed each OTHER before, because I tend to write characters at the start of a relationship because that exploratory, careful manner of figuring out how to kiss is just so fucking cute for damn near any ship.

37) How do you choose where to end a chapter?

I decide in my mental outline or Scrivener outline how much I can fit in this chapter. And it’s just…the last thing I can stuff in. My tendency to write long af chapters is a more important factor than wanting to end on a particular scene.

38) Would you ever write commissions?

I…don’t think so. I’ve definitely thought about the idea. But even if I had buyers, writing a commission probably wouldn’t go any faster than my own fics do, which, again, take months or possibly fucking YEARS…my payment would be fractions of a fraction of a cent per hour if you wanna slice it that way which is SOOOOO not worth it for the amount of time it takes me, and the time it takes away from my own wips, and there’s not many customers who I think would have the absurd patience required for ME to pump out a finished piece…the outlook is just not good.

39) Share a snippet from a WIP

(I’m putting a snippet of the dang AtsuHina Sci-fi horror fic I keep talking about)

The metal circle was knocked inward. It fell onto the basement floor with a hard thud, kicking up a puff of dust. Shoyo glimpsed a slice of the semi-dark inside: the innards of Saint Winona��s wall, wires and circular metal things with tiny glowing lights. Machines that kept his city alive. He’d seen some of those things in textbooks long ago.

The arm of a filthy spacesuit shot out of the hole and grasped for purchase on the basement floor.

A man with dirty, dark hair crawled out through the small hole. He was smeared with dust; his space suit looked ancient and strange, like dirty white leather. There was no helmet around the collar, only a metal collar at the neck of the outfit where one might have once fit on.

His hand slipped on the metal circle he’d cut out of the wall and fell forward onto his chest. He pushed the circle out of the way with a furious shout that made Shoyo gasp aloud in fear.

That’s when the man noticed he wasn’t alone in the room. That’s when he finally raised his head and showed his face and Shoyo’s soul writhed inside the cage of his frozen body.

The face—the face—his face—

He had Atsumu’s face.

-

40) If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

I have daydreamed of commissioning some artist many months in the future to draw scene in Darcia, where Oikawa is a demon a la FHQ but with some eldritch qualities. There’s also many dragons in the fic.

I have this scene in my head of Oikawa in the foreground, walking away from the camera towards four or five dragons backed up against a huge cave/dungeon wall in the background. They're like 20-50 foot tall beasts, who are all terrified of this human sized creature because he's going to kill them and he CAN. They are shooting fire or trying to claw at him but he is magically shielded and nothing works. The point is to amplify how utterly horrifying and powerful Oikawa is even in the face of gigantic and powerful monsters.

But imagining scared dragons backed up against a wall afraid of a small human can easily make them look goofy, unfortunately like an elephant scared of a mouse...so it would be a tough balancing act to portray the scene as scary instead of accidentally comedic.

41) Do you tend to reread fics or are you a one-and-done kind of person?

I am mostly a one-and-done person. There are a handful of fics I might return to to read specific scenes or chapters but I basically never re-read entire fics again. The memory of the fic and me appreciating it afterward is usually enough.

42) What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it?

I've been slowly going through the "horror" tag in the Haikyuu fandom, a kind of slim tag with only 400-some fics out of the whole Haikyuu section which is probably to be expected...

But I found this total gem called YACHI HITOKA: ZOMBIE SLAYER.

It's only 3 chapters long and not updated for many months now. But the chapters are quite long, and intense and horrific and WHOOO what a rush! I think it's a fantastic read for horror fans. Yachi is far from being a "zombie slayer" so far but I can see that there's tiny bits of growth in her bravery, inching their way up. I absolutely recommend it.

I left a huge glowing review to the author almost a month ago but they moderate comments and mine still hasn't appeared tho :0)

43) Do you take a sadistic joy in whumping your characters, or are you more the "If you hurt them I would kill everyone and then myself" kind of person?

Closer to the “taking joy” in it end of things I guess. I enjoy writing characters going through intense action or adventures or escapes. If that involves pain, fighting, getting hurt, etc then hell yeahhhhh.

44) What mistakes do you keep making no matter how many times your beta corrects you?

Me thriving with no beta and dick flapping in the wind: YEEEEEE

45) Do you want to break your readers‘ heart or make them laugh?

Leaning more towards the heartbreaking side. But being able to come up with a truly funny line is an accomplishment as well, and harder I think.

46) How would you describe your style? (Character/emotion/action-driven, etc)

Intense, more focus on narration than dialogue, viscerally ugly and suspenseful, romance is always at least a little creepy lol…I wonder how other people see my work in general like this.

47) How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

It gets combed through several times as I write, then one last once-over after I finish the chapter. Therefore the “rough draft” (after getting to the end of the draft) and “final draft” look very similar.

48) What do you look for in a beta?

#44 ^^^

49) Do you ever get rude reviews and how do you deal with them?

I can only think of one rude review I got, it was for my naruto/pokemon crossover story on FFN that I got 26 chapters into before basically abandoning it in 2014-ish. Someone said basically “no one cares about these characters except ur ugly cringe ass”. I just ignored it.

Though nowadays sometimes I hope a hater would comment on my fics because I think coming up with a sniping comeback, and then freezing the comment thread so mine stands as the last word in the conversation, would be so fuckin gooooood…

50) How long is your longest fic?

Well uhhh I think that’s the Naruto/Maximum Ride crossover I wrote in 8th and 9th grade and I just had to check, it was 25 chapters when I abandoned it and 227k long! Cringe af now but lord I was so proud of it at the time.

People reviewing that story gave me a real-life confidence boost to the point that in 9th grade, classmates and teachers and people I didn’t talk to at all actually noticed and started chatting me up, because I was suddenly more interesting and engaging. 9th grade was the start of me understanding how to socialize...because of my fanfiction!

51) What’s your total AO3 word count?

273,602 (wow only slightly longer than the 8th-9th grade fic maximum ride crossover fic WOW?)

52) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

If they are long, substantive, or directly ask me a question. Otherwise not usually. I don’t feel the need to respond to every comment when I already wrote the damn story. I also don’t like the idea of half my comment count on a story just puffing my stats by endlessly replying “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Tha

53) How do you spend your time when it comes to fanfiction? Are you primarily a fic reader, writer, or a perfect 50/50 split of both?

Definitely a writer more than a reader, though I’d say in high school it was a 50/50 split. Somehow I read more but also wrote overall more…because I didn’t have to work aghgnghgh

54) What’s your favorite part about the fanfiction writing process?

The fact that I can do what-EVER the fuck I want. I can write batshit insane endings. I can add “obsessive/possessive behavior” magic fairy dust to my favorite characters to make them have sexy interactions with my faves that appeal to my silly fictional tastes. I can give someone an unexplained Raikou companion in a universe that has no other Pokemon and not explain it if I don’t feel like it. I can indulge in anything, dress it up how I please, and still practice a fun and interesting skill, and CREATE! I LOVE CREATING STORIES!

55) Of the characters you write for, which is your favorite? Has that choice been swayed at all by your followers/readers’ reactions to certain ones?

It has to be Sakura Haruno, doesn’t it? Even long past the end of Naruto, she lives on in my heart, in my beloved story Chasm…I own three figures of her for god’s sake. I started caring about her in middle school and I was part of the growing “MultiSaku” fanfic scene in the late 00’s and 2010’s. Even after all these years and all these fandoms and stories and life events and things I had to pass through and carry…I never let go of her.

And no my choice of favorite character to write for is not swayed by any other people, lol please.

56) What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

I think I write very good intense action scenes. Scenes that feel like a razor’s edge slicing your skin that might penetrate and cut through you. I re-read my own action scenes a lot and still feel proud of the ugly, harsh imagery and the suspenseful nature of a movement making you unsure if it will turn out safe for the character or not. I love thinking up “cinematography” for movements like that in my head.

57) Do you prefer editing as you write, or waiting until it’s finished?

Mostly edit as I write, with a final pass over after the draft is finished.

58) What part of the writing process do you enjoy the most? (Brainstorming, outlining, writing, editing, etc)

I feel like I answered this. 58 questions into the 78 I've realized some of these questions are rather similar to each other. The writing part is the best.

59) Does anyone in your personal life know you write fic? if not, would you tell anyone?

My bff and I have been into fanfiction since 2006. Though I don’t think I told her my FFN name until 2010 or 2011. More than a little disappointed that she doesn’t read my fics anyway because we’re not into the same genre and she’s not a person I can talk to about writing either so wtf was the point. Also my brother knows I write fic and is friendly/nice about the concept of fic in general. I certainly don’t share with him but he doesn’t mock fanfic as cringe or a waste or anything.

These two are exceptions. For the most part, HELL NOOOOOOO. I never plan to tell anyone irl I write fic, it is too private and precious to me. Someone irl finding out about my fanfiction or fandom things in general is truly my worst nightmare.

60) Have you had a writer you admire comment on your fic? What was that like?

Yes, a couple of times. Their words meant more than the average commenter of course because they’re on a pedestal in my mind. I know their exceptional work so they damn well know what they’re talking about when they say similar things about my work. That’s the kind of comment I will keep in my email inbox for days if not weeks for easy re-reading.

61) Why do you continue writing fics?

Because I love them. Because I love the art of translating a character into a plot of my making. I love placing my favorite characters into a canvas I made and making them a part of it, and making something that is perfectly suited to ME. It has my colors, only mine, it’s my love letter addressed to me.

62) Thoughts on cliffhangers?

Not many thoughts on cliffhangers. If I write one, I rarely think of it as such, more like, this is a suitable place to end the chapter if possible. The usual “it sucks if you’re a reader, gotta wait for the next update, aw man” whatever.

63) Something you hate to see in smut.

Dirty talk involving one character calling the other a whore or slut. Once in a while I’m into it, usually I’m not. I think I’ve got a bone to pick with…humiliation, or something? Sometimes it can be hot as hell, sometimes it borderline offends me. And that’s a really popular and hell, a NORMAL thing for people to do, like some of the most basic dirty talk there is, so it’s hard to dodge. I have to just scowl a little and keep reading.

64) Something you love to see in smut.

One character acting like an animal. Rutting, biting, licking. Possessive behavior and body worship. Character calling the other one “mine” can be a lame fanfic stereotype but I’m SO INTO THAT

65) Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project

Really looking forward to the end battle in my Haikyuu fantasy au where Kageyama is a mage and Hinata is a unicorn. The battle involves KageHina (both human at this time) and also mage Oikawa and Iwaizumi who is in human form but by this point everyone in the story knows he’s actually a dragon. The villain is a unicorn OC who’s filled with rage, resentment and bitterness and wants to make others suffer, she’s a sad bitch but mostly a petty bitch.

In my head, the battle happens to the tune of the final battle theme in Elden Ring (which I have not played) and I just loooove what happens to the villain at the end. It is beyond satisfying, and unexpected, I think. But god, that’s like 50k words away at LEAST.

66) How do you deal with writing pressure (ie. pressure to update, negative comments, deadlines, etc.)?

My pressure comes 95% from ME feeling bad about how long I take. I deal with it by…trying to fucking write and also a lot of feeling bad, idk.

My update schedule is so slow that the shit mentioned in the question does not affect me at all. Also, those things don’t really happen to me? I get almost no negative comments, hell I kind of dream of getting a negative comment because I like thinking up snide, uncaring, rude etc., ways I’d snap back at them. No way in hell would they make me write faster.

67) Do you prefer prompts and challenges, or completely independent ideas?

I don’t really do prompts or challenges. The closest I can think is a few prompt asks I did her on tumblr, years ago. I did maybe 3 in my entire life. Not really a prompt person. I got WIPs out the wazoo, like I need more on my plate.

68) What, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

Lately I’ve been doing the absolute normie shit of making Pinterest boards. I have about 15 boards that are dedicated to either a specific fanfic or just a common theme in many fics (board for dragons, board for fantasy castles and towns etc). I usually don’t need to like manually force inspiration though, it comes when it comes and I prefer that to needing to use Pinterest tbh.

69) What work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

Oh man, I don’t even know if I want to say the names of some of them haha. Probably one of my various MultiSaku stories from my Stormdragon6 account on FFN, which I’ve had since 2005 when I had just started middle school…I didn't use AO3 until 2014-15 and most of my FFN stories are NOT cross posted there.

I’m sure there’s many on the FFN account that are equally cringe and I don’t really want to look. They meant a lot to me when I wrote them and took quite a lot of effort and time for a teen to do…I’ll keep them in my mind that way instead.

70) When asked, are you embarrassed or enthusiastic to tell people that you write?

Outside of fandom social media I don’t EVER tell people I write, period. My mom knows I wrote the middle school talking dragon book and STILL once in a while says I should publish it bc she hasn’t read a book in about 15 years and is a horrible judge of good writing. I keep telling her I “forgot” where I put that book but it’s gathering dust in my garage and I hope she eventually goes senile and forgets about it.

Otherwise I haven’t mentioned writing as a hobby to anyone irl but my bff and brother since like 2012. It is EXTREMELY private to me.

71) When it comes to more complicated narratives, how do you keep track of outlines, characters, development, timeline, ect.?

I used to just keep two Microsoft Word documents per story (at least longer ones) one for the story itself, whatever most recent chapter I was working on, and a second one for the notes/outline on that story. Sometimes I kept a third one for storing axed/rewritten passages of writing. It was tedious but I knew no other way.

I’m glad I have Scrivener now to keep all those things in one “document” basically which makes it easier to look through it all and compare things side to side.

72) What order do you write in? front of book to back? chronological? favorite scenes first? something else?

Chronological! I can’t imagine writing any other way omg ew. Writing a big epic scene when I have'nt written or decided the buildup sounds like a horrible idea. It simply will not be written the same as it would when I know and have experienced all that led up to it.

73) What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?

I’m having a lot of trouble with this one. Any quality I can think of, some other people surely do as well. I like focusing on dangerous, scary conflicts and situations that are more horror movie-esque than like, fun? I bring in magical or supernatural creatures whenever I can. I love writing chase scenes especially between two parties in a ship. I ship damn near anything. I have my own flavor when you mix these things together, I guess.

74) You’ve posted a fic anonymously. How would someone be able to guess that you’d written it?

This is getting kind of repetitive again. The stuff I mentioned above. Maybe if there’s a lot of horses, unicorns or talking animals that might be a sign that it’s me…using the possessive behavior tag…shipping Sakura with a man who tried to kill her at least once…nowadays I think the horses/unicorn inclusion would be the biggest clue lol.

75) What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it?

There’s a few scenes in Chasm (MadaSaku dark fantasy, Madara is a huge wingless gryphon) where Sakura has to talk to Madara and/or the Uchiha clan, and they’re big scary monsters and she’s terrified. Pushing these conversations along to get to the point of them while not having the two parties just insulting/dismissing the other, trying to build up a bit of a relationship between them at the same time…was really hard! Those Madara-Sakura talking scenes are HARD! I remember being stuck on the dialogue several times, for ages each time. Gah!!

76) Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [Fanfic Name]?

Lots. There’s several stories of mine with pieces that I scrapped (put in the 3rd word doc) and didn’t use. I remember writing that I scrapped 12,000 words of Chasm chapter two back in the day.

Oh I had a scene in the AtsuHina sci-fi horror recently where Atsumu and Hinata get into a van that’s basically a taxi. Suna, Atsumu's friend, is the driver and interrupts when AtsuHina are feeling each other up in the backseat. I forget the timing exactly…but Atsumu playfully asks if Hinata has ever fucked in a taxi, and Suna is right there looking through his little divider window and replies, “* I’ve * fucked in a taxi,” and Atsumu shouts at him to listen to his fucking podcasts and shut the window already.

I thought it was really funny, but I cut it for time/word count and not really fitting the tone of growing ominousness. That chapter ended up at 15k without that scene which was 1k by itself.

77) Do you have a favorite scene you’ve written from [Fanfic Name] story/chapter?

Yes, I really like the writing I used in the “alien Oikawa finally breaks into the ship” scene in Day of the Navigator, end of Chapter 2.

I think its ominous tone is strong at the start, which bursts into shock and horror when Iwaizumi sees the alien at the end of the hallway and almost faints, he imagines his dead captain Ushijima to fucking get up and move, and he bravely stands against the charging alien with a flamethrower. Catches him in a net shot out of a....net gun...first, then burns him with the flamethrower up close. Alienkawa can regenerate tho and will NOT be deterred from claiming and fucking his cute humanbride so he shakes it off.

But god, it was fantastic to write.

-

Oh my god I wrote 77 answers (this took 2 days). Why can’t I write fanfic at this kind of speed. I guess because following a plot matters and takes much more care than 77 individual questions jeeeeeeeeesus I answered 77 questions…sending my corpse to Jammie in the mail

@spacejammie-eimmajecaps

[kelieah]

Tom taking care of a tired and frustrated you, like him cuddling u or showering u with kisses or practically babying you n eventually u fall asleep in his lap with your head in his neck n he carries u to bed, just very fluffy fluffy!! 💙

just us (tom holland x reader)

word count: 1.3k

warnings: fluuffff, mentions of sex, language, tom being a div

edited: kind of a shitty ending, and kinda rushed agh, sorry 

a/n: love this ideaaa, just going to somehow tie in the reader’s birthday into this hehe

tom holland masterlist

Last year, Tom planned a big birthday party for you, inviting your friends, his friends, coworkers, and family. It was crazy. Personally, you hated being in the spotlight so although you appreciated his efforts, you didn’t enjoy yourself as much as you wanted to. So this year, you’ve been trying hard to avoid the topic of plans for your birthday. You also really hoped no one would plan a surprise birthday party.

You wake up to the sight of Tom walking into your bedroom, with a stack of pancakes and a candle in the middle. His face is painted with excitement and warmth, and you couldn’t help but smile at the sight. “Happy birthday, sleepyhead,” he whispers and sits down next to you, leaning in to kiss your cheek.

You smile tiredly and look at the plate of food, tearing up at how cutely decorated it is. “Tommy,” you sniffle and pout at him.

“Oh, baby,” he laughs and places the plate aside, pulling you into his arms.

After he picked you up and brought you to the kitchen to eat breakfast, the two of you began to get ready for the day. You let out a quiet sigh as you smoothed down your dress against your body, your mind swirling with thoughts about whether or not you should be honest to Tom about the big parties and all.

“I heard that sigh,” you hear Tom come up from behind you and snake his arms around your waist. He rests his chin on your shoulder and glances at you in the mirror, “Are you okay?”

You nod and place your hands on top of his, swaying with him as he hugs you close. “Perfectly okay.”

“I’ve known you for how many years?” he asks rhetorically and raises an eyebrow for dramatic effect. Accepting your silence as an answer, he nods and confirms it himself, “Right, five years and you think I don’t know you well? I’m honestly offended love.”

“Shut up,” you groan and tilt your head back, looking up at him as he gazes down at you. “I’m just tired, that’s all.”

“I have a feeling I know what’s upsetting you,” he brings his hands down to your waist and squeezes it.

“Well, then what is it?” you huff.

“I actually didn’t know I was just bluffing to see if you’re really upset,” he admits sheepishly as you gape at him. “Now I know! Babe, what’s wrong?” he holds up his hands in defeat and lets go of you.

You grumble quietly at the loss of his touch and shrug, turning to face him. “I was joking. I’m just tired.”

“You slept for ten hours,” he points out.

You send him a glare, “Because you fucked me all day yesterday.”

“Valid point,” he nods and purses his lips, laughing as you groan loudly with frustration. He follows you as you rush off to your bedroom, “Darling, you know I’m only teasing. Come on, it’s your birthday. I want you to be able to do whatever you want to do. If you want to sleep all day, so be it.”

“Oh really?” you amuse and turn back around while plopping down onto your mattress.

“Yes, really,” he stands in front of you, holding out his hands for you to grasp.

Reluctantly, you hold his hands and look into his eyes, noticing how he is desperately trying to read you. “I’m sorry,” you bring your lips to the back of his hand. “I really am tired, but it’s no excuse to be a bitch.”

“You’re not being a bit—”

“In all honesty, I just really am not looking forward to having a big party.”

“Who said we’re doing that?” he interrupts causing you to give him a deadpanned stare.

“I know you well too. It’s not much of a surprise when I can hear you planning in the closet. You’re not that sly, Holland,” you feel a smirk grow onto your lips.

He scoffs, still trying to dismiss your accusations. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Honey, if you don’t wanna have a big party or a party at all, we don’t have to. Like I said, we can do whatever you want. Even if you just want the entire to yourself, just let me know,” he lifts you up and pulls you close to him.

You eye him suspiciously and drape your arms over his shoulders, “So, you’re basically telling me now that there’s no big surprise party being prepared this minute?”

“Nope,” he smiles at you confidently and tucks a hair behind your ear. “Your day is free.”

You feel all the weights lift off your shoulder and you let out a quiet satisfied sigh. You lean your forehead against his chest and press your lips together. “I just want to spend the day with you and you only. Well, maybe a bunch of food too, but you know. Just us.”

“Yeah, I know,” he chuckles lightly and presses a long, tender kiss on the top of your head. “That sounds perfect, how about we go for lunch or order in. Watch some movies, maybe go to the park and when the sun settles, we could cook a meal together? Then maybe take a bath together, drink some wine, have some fun, and then sleep?” he plans out the rest of the day in one sentence and you tear up at the thought.

“That sounds absolutely perfect. Thank you,” you bring your head back up to meet his face and peck his lips.

“Always, I’ll go grab the keys?” he smiles and kisses you a bit longer, cupping the side of your face.

“Mhm, lemme go grab my coat and stuff.”

And you two did exactly what he planned, all the way to have some fun that results in the both of you not sleeping, yet.

“So much for a bath,” you stifle a laugh, sitting down on the side of the tub as your legs tremble from the previous activities.

He grins and goes down on his knees, wiping you dry. “Hey, nothing wrong with having the fun a little bit earlier.”

“Mm, true. But now I’m really tired,” you slip on the pajamas he hands you.

He puts on his boxers and laughs in response, “I bet. Wanna be carried to bed?” 

You nod eagerly and hold out your arms, “Yes, please.”

He kisses your forehead and swoops you up easily, bringing you towards the bed you both share. He places you down and slides in next to you, wrapping his arms around you to hold you close.

You shift around to get comfortable and soon drape your leg over his, your hand also resting on his bare chest. “Thank you, for today,” you murmur lazily, drawing gentle shapes into his skin. He hums quietly and caresses your skin as well, dragging his hand along your shoulders to your jaw.

“Always, just talk to me next time. Okay? Don’t want you wallowing in self-doubt and stuff,” he whispers and cups your face to kiss you all over repeatedly. 

You giggle and nod in agreement, then turning around to become the smaller spoon. He smiles and inhales your addicting scent, feeling himself becoming drowsy and tired. He eventually falls asleep and before you could, you hear his phone go off on your bedside, the light brightening up the room a bit. You sit up slightly to glance over and make sure it’s nothing important, but your jaw drops once you see the messages from Harrison.

‘How was your day mate?’

‘We were able to cancel the reservation and tell everyone who was invited about the last minute change of plans’

‘All of her gifts are at my place though.... so figure that out too lol’

‘Pretty sure your busy ;)’

‘But seriously text or call me back when you can div, the caterers just dropped off all the food that was ordered at my place’

‘It’s like a bloody mall in here’ 

You let out a quiet gasp as you read the messages and eventually slide back into Tom’s embrace, knowing damn well you were right from the very beginning.

inbox link under the cut! thanks for reading ツ

leave a comment, give me some feedback pls! it’s greatly appreciated mwah

tagging some mutuals! @sunsetholland @peterssweetpea @ptersmj @evermoreholland @marvelouspeterparker @supremethunda @emmastarz @parkerpeter2469-blog @felicityparkers @spideyspeaches @hollandcrush @ms-misery @msmarvelsmain @heavenlyholland @veryholland @greenorangevioletgrass @spidey-sophie

[mint-leaves-in-coffee]

some fun twst questions for u <3

[i'm sending these to random ppl, feel free to answer if you see this and/or tag/send it to another person!]

would you be a mer, a beastman, a fae, or a human? (or other!)

would you be at rsa or nrc?

what dorm would you belong to?

what character(s) would you be best friends with?

what character(s) would you hate?

what character(s) would you date?

what would floyd’s nickname be for you?

and rook’s?

what twst character(s) are you most like? (personality-wise)

which subject(s) do you think you would excel at?

what club would you join?

how do you think you would survive in twisted wonderland/what would your life be like in general?

[optional!] what would your unique magic be?

I have a fae pref tbh. It's the pointy ears for me. Though being a beastman doesn't sound too bad

NRC probably. Goth moment

I feel like either Diasomnia or Ignihyde. On one hand I'm an introverted tech god that panics at the sight of another human being, and hyperfixates on the stuff I work on with a major perfectionism issue. But on the other hand I was the "gifted" prodigy kid growing up so I was all top marks and 'smart kid' classes. Seeing as Diasomnia is the dorm where every excels at magic and classes then that also fits, but my dumbass went from a 4.0 in high school to a fucking 2.6 in college because I stopped caring about my grades.

Uhh shit. I'm not sure. I go out of my way to avoid talking to people at all costs unless they talk to me first. Extroverts scared me and rapidly drain my social battery. So I couldn't really be friends with Cater, Rook, or Kalim. Ace and Deuce would be tolerable in small amounts. In the long run I feel like I'd vibe with Trey, Jade (though I feel like he and Floyd are a packaged deal and Floyd would probably be too much for me to handle if I were to be around him too much), Azul (maybe), Jamil, Idia (gaming buddies probably), Malleus and Silver

I want to pummel both Riddle and Vil. I am not sorry. Sebek is on thin fucking ice

Laughs in Leona, Malleus, and Jamil simp

Only thing I can think of off the top of my head is Arowana. They're mostly solitary and can be extremely aggressive when it comes to defending their space. Which... same bestie....

I don't know and frankly I don't want to know or give him the chance to give me one 👍🏻

I'm a mixture of several of them lol. Mostly Idia's shyness and video game obsessions, Riddle's anger issues, Leona's laziness, but also Trey's whole parental figure thing, and Kalim's airheadness

Magical history or alchemy. History was always one of my best subjects in school. As far as alchemy goes, I'm equating it with science and I am a biology major.

Science club :3c

My life would probably be pretty mundane, just like it already is. I go to school and work at a restaurant I ain't got much goin' tbh. Maybe the occasional stupid antic from Ace or Deuce if I feel like tolerating them

I would prefer something healing based? I'm a healer main in most every game I play and I just wanna be isekai'd into a fantasy world to be the doctor/apothecary (or the merchant NPC but thats irrelevant).

[mjxmoon]

a message from moon 

i hit 100 followers on here a little bit ago and want to say thank you, so thank you very much, but also goodbye.

warning: this is unnecessarily long because i like to ramble so feel free to read the last few paragraphs more specifically the one labeled important lol

i’m going to be a senior in high school which means college applications are about to whoop my ass so i wasn’t planning on being as active anyway but a lot of stuff has changed for me regarding the contents of this blog and i feel like i owe y’all an explanation.

i’m not really a fan of dream anymore. honestly i stopped watching his content about a month after i created this blog. i didn’t hate him or anything just got wrapped up in other interests. oddly enough i still enjoyed writing about him and other members of the dream team so i continued doing it. plus so many of you sent in requests and i was so excited that my work was being appreciated that i happily continued writing. 

but now i think i’m at a point where it feels weird writing stuff about a person who i…not dislike butttt am no longer pleased with? it’s hard to explain. but in short i’ve kinda just lost interest and have found myself viewing the dream smp/team etc. in a whole new light. 

i hope this doesn’t feel like i’ve been lying to you all. i genuinely enjoyed writing and posting what i did and don’t regret anything at all. i have zero bad blood with the mcyt fan community, i just want to move on. 

i know i was pretty inactive compared to other blogs and most of you are probably like ‘oh shit she still posts?’ but i actually did have a lot of fun on here even if i was just sharing my work inconsistently with a small number of people.

when i created this account back in february i felt proud to be known by a lot of you as one of the first writers posting mcyt content catered to Black people. i do a lot of work with Black representation in my local community so getting to do it online even for a couple of months felt good.

i have no intention of deleting this blog. i’ll keep everything up for now unless i decide otherwise in the late future. and i still have some unfinished things that i might finish and post but maybe i’ll share what’s in my inbox as prompts for all of you because there are some good ones in there that i never got around to (sorry!!). but seriously if any of y’all ever make some black reader content mcyt related or not: tag me i would love to check it out!!!!  

(important) i know i said “goodbye” but it’s really more of a goodbye to the mcyt content. i’ll definitely continue to post random shit on here and maybe i’ll even start writing for my other interests. but since a lot of you followed for the mcyt content feel free to unfollow no hard feelings i understand. 

so thank you everyone!!!! thank you to my beautiful anons y’all truly were the highlight of my mcyt era and thank you to everyone who liked, reblogged, followed etc. i love you dearly. also im always online and do truly love making new friends so hit me up :D

- moon

omg why did i write so much swear no ones gonna see this LMAOOO this was more for me anyway, like a breakup letter for myself or something else stupid also i created a new blog so if y’all want that let me know and i’ll dm it to you ok im done 

[knicks-knacks]

wait a min who 👀 is Wistoria 👀👀 (i am wondering :)

HGFDSJGJ I love that writing that tag I was like "Krch is gonna ask about them" fdjgkhdfjk that's perfect im going to hug you

So!!! Wist!!! She's my Forsaken OC bc I just really love the deaders and think zombies are cool and think that there is a lot to be done with like... lore bits of the forsaken and you know how much I love my lore bits.

The most concise way I can describe her is she's a Forsaken fashion designer and skin stitcher/bone-engraver who specializes in designing fancy clothes that shows off the exposed or rotting bits of the Forsaken, in an effort to kind of help the people who feel dysphoric about their not-quite-dead bodies and to show people that they can embrace those things they deem "ugly" and make them beautiful, rather than hide them away in shame. However, she wasn't always so willing to embrace it herself.

More on that in the less concise story under the cut lol it got long on accident

(heads up: this characters pronouns are she/they and I use them super interchangeably throughout this. also sorry this took so long to type i got distracted and also wanted to try and cover it the best I could!)

tw for: the typical mentions of bones and missing body parts/rotting flesh typical for forsaken in WoW though nothing too graphic. and also death but her being a zombie that's a given

So, Wistoria herself, before she passed, she was a well-known seamstress in Lordaeron! Born into a noble family (though not high, her parents were only lord/lady), and growing up seeing all the pretty clothes, they pretty quickly learned they wanted to focus themself on that, and their parents supported them in that. After training under a mentor since youth she ended up getting REAL damn good at making clothes - both simple and elaborate. Eventually became the favored tailor to a lot of the nobility. It kind of helped her family climb the political ladder, making dresses and suits for the baroness and the marquis etc. She also loved dressing up herself!

She's a very kind and patient individual, always excited to hear about a client's day or what's going on in their life, though she's quite reserved about herself. They're kind of... quietly charming if that makes sense. Not charming in a way that Flynn Fairwind is, but more in an Anduin-type way? Not the type you'd take for a night out at the bar, more the type you'd have a long personal conversation with over warm tea in a dimly lit coffee shop. Comforting. Fitting sessions are almost like low-key therapy sessions because she feels rather cozy and easy to talk to about troubles - though they're not a therapist lol.

Also a tidbit that I just think is cute - she's taken some training in being a mage! It helps her with her sewing and they are a mage in game so I thought it fit perfect lol

anyways she gets murdered by the scourge and raised again and gets saved by Sylvanas etc etc etc

Due to the way that their corpse rotted, they lost the flesh of their lower jaw, and their chest, leaving her jaw and ribcage exposed.

At first, she was rather horrified by her appearance - as most forsaken are. It scared them to not look like... themself. And even surrounded by other forsaken whose bodies were just as bad off as hers if not worse, she still felt rather uncomfortable with those exposed bones. They typically wore a veil or a poncho to cover themself up as best as they could.

She continued making clothes. Threw themself into the cause to help the newly formed Forsaken. Salvaged cloths from graves to try and make wearable stuff. Helped sew up other forsaken at times, if it was urgent. But mostly helped in making clothes (and sometimes armor) for the people when they needed it.

Then, after the scourge was defeated and they made their new home in Undercity, and things started to shift into a New Normal, they gradually started going back to their roots a bit. Fancier, more dressy clothes. She also frequently ended up making adjustments to clothes she made in the past that old clients managed to salvage - what once fit perfect now didn't, due to lost limbs and lost muscle/fat. And of course, she was happy to restore those old clothes for the client, whatever she could do to help, but those were sometimes a rough job. It kind of brought a bunch of negative thoughts to the forefront when they did them. Their old life was gone and nothing would be the same, their body is no longer the same. Perhaps these clients come to her for alterations on old living clothes because they can't let go of the fact that they're no longer living. That sort of thing. Makes her deeply sad both for the whole of the Forsaken and for herself.

That changes though, as I said.

Soon after they had been saved by Sylvanas, they met Leila - a blood elf. They grew close, then closer, and you could Tell there was a fuck ton of romantic tension there from the start. Over time, Leila kind of helped Wistoria get their confidence back - because if she could love them, they could love themself too. She was still reserved about the way she looked, and still hid it all the time, but then there was a moment that kind of opened her eyes.

So uh, Leila and Wistoria had been out picking flowers that they planned to preserve and use in a dress. While out, Wist managed to slip and fall into a mud puddle and so had to change, but something about That Day she was particularly uncomfortable with her body. They turned away from Leila, and Leila pointed out to them that they didn't have to do that around her - she'd seen it all before anyway. And Wistoria commented how they didn't want to disgust her or anything. Leila frowned at her for a moment and then asks Wistoria to turn to her because she wants to do something. Wist hesitates a moment but from Leila's tone of voice, she knew that it was okay to let her see. Then Leila took some thread, and the flowers they'd just picked together, and - with permission - began tying and weaving them into and through Wistorias ribs. She filled their whole chest cavity meticulously with leaves and flowers and thread. She carefully tied a snapdragon upside down on their sternum. Then, she rummaged for a while through Wistorias fancy clothes, found a jacket, found a skirt, helped Wist get dressed.

Then, when she was finished, she turned Wistoria around and had them look in a mirror. No veil, no cover, just their body and how beautiful it was. Wistoria, of course, ends up crying, because it had just been so LONG since she dressed herself up. She hadn't been able to look at herself naked for longer than a second since she was raised, but now she couldn't stop taking it in, and how pretty it was, and how inspiring.

Leila and her have a long talk, after that, about loving herself and seeing that she didn't need to look like her living self to be beautiful. That her body wasn't this disgusting or uncomfortable thing that she needed to hide or be ashamed of, even with the missing parts.

After this, they still take time to regain their confidence, of course. But with support from Leila (and a lot of my other ocs lol) they get to the point that they love themselves again. They get their bones engraved, and they end up loving it so much that they take it up themself. She dabbles into decorative stitching on skin, something she had shied away from at first. Her clothes start reflecting her comfort, she stops wearing the veil and the cover, wears jackets with no shirt. Until eventually they're designing dresses that are cut specifically to showcase her missing parts. Like a boob window but with no boob, just skeleton!

Eventually, she becomes known for being the best person to come to when trying to get dress clothes that cater to specific missing bits. She makes capes with slits down the middle to expose the spine sticking out. They make one leg on a pantsuit sheer to see the bone. She makes gloves that hook onto the radius and ulna.

She's also a good person to go to if you want some flowers engraved on your bones. :)

Overall she's just. They struggled a lot with being raised but ended up being so proud of the Forsaken and what they've been through, and they end up just being. A real positive force to them bc I've always seen clothes and appearance really important to someone's self-image, at least to me. She wants others to feel as good in their skin, what little they have of it, like she finally does. And it took them a while to get there but they got there and I'm so proud of her 😭🥺🙌

[paceypeternathanslawyer]

Follow up to my post about Jess and Pacey parallels

Because I got an anon saying that people are allowed to make comparisons between Pacey and Jess. At no point in my post did I say people aren’t allowed to do so. I do not have the power to tell you, you are not allowed to. I am not your parent and I don’t claim to be. I am merely saying that it is fucked up to compare the two because they are not comparable (due to all the reasons I said in post... which you clearly did not read)

Also I did not put it in the anti Jess tag because I did not feel it was mean enough to do so. I said he grew up to be a pretty good guy for fucks sake. I thought I was being pretty nice especially compared to how I was in the past. Also I only spoke the truth. If you can’t hear the truth about your problematic fave than i’m sorry... don’t know what to tell you. I will defend Pacey with my life and that includes defending him against people who will blaspheme him by comparing him to sucky people.

Whenever I make a post I weigh the good and the bad to decide whether or not it belongs in the anti tag. I did consider it, but I felt I put a good enough spin that it didn’t belong there. Also I felt I owed it to Pacey to have as many people as possible see it. There’s only a few things that I refuse to put in the anti tag and one of those is Billy Hargrove hate. I believe it is morally wrong to cater to Billy Hargrove stans so I refuse to put anything bad I have to say about him in the anti tag.

And I won’t put this in the Jess tag because that’s the kind of nice hairpin I am lol

[chaoticneutralwriter]

Deleted Scene; Off-Chance Meeting

What if Jimin met....Jimin?

guardian demon!Jimin x reader

genre: fluff, romance, angst, comedy, supernatural

word count: 4.2k

Related works: See masterlist under guardian demon!Jimin

A/n: So this was like....a half developed scene that I was going to put in for Interlude: Second Best buuuuut I didn’t want to make the chapter too long because the main focus was guardian demon!Jimin’s POV from the events in the previous chapter. However! It’s been mentioned as a ‘what-if’ so I completed it as a fun deleted scene. Hope you like it and hope yall are doing okay! take care, be safe and I’ll hopefully see you soon again for another update, this time with story progression LOL

BTW! Thanks for the 1,026 follows!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖💖💖💖

Tag List: @cherryjiminiee @kokobaekkie @breathebangtan @itsadoozie @thatshylatinagirl @chiminieboi @azulamakesmeblank @sectumsemptae @awkwardwookie @aduky @poisonseashell @shortannoyingginger @caramelmac-chiato @sana-b @jiminstinct

Jimin’s game plan to blend in is quite simple because it really only consists of one step; grab a staff member so that he can duplicate the lanyard ID they have. Even though he promised to not use his powers to you for the most part, it doesn’t mean he hasn’t found ways to work around it. He easily locks onto a target — a male staff exiting the artist room to step out into the hallway Jimin’s in, presumably on a short break as he strides down to stop by a vending machine. The male staff has his head down, eyes glued to his phone for a while until finally, he takes a quick glance up to view the selection of snacks before ducking his head again, clearly in no rush at all.

Jimin’s lips quirk and he makes quick work at slipping closer, steps light and so undetectable that he may as well be a ghost rather than a demon. At the last minute, Jimin cloaks himself, sneaking up on the unsuspecting male just as he reaches into his back pocket to grab some change. The demon’s touch feels nothing more than a draft, fingers barely caressing the back of the colourful lanyard hanging around his neck but it’s all he needs. The male staff carries on, punching in the numbers and watches as the bag of chips falls into the slot below. Taking it, he walks away, none the wiser.

Jimin pays no mind to him anymore, focused on slipping the thin silver chain necklace out from under his shirt and with a soft blow of his breath, the silver chain morphs into the lanyard, a perfect copy. Normally, he would do without a need for something tangible to cast the illusion but this way, he wouldn’t have to use too much magic to keep it up — a weight to the illusion is more believable than simply thin air.

Satisfied, he lets the cloaking spell disperse, rolling his neck a little at the relief that he can finally walk around more freely without the worry of hiding or arousing suspicions.

“Now… where to go?” He mumbles quietly to himself, eyes darting before deciding that he should scope out the way to the area under the stage. Just as he rounds the corner though—

“Woah!”

Jimin’s fast reflexes has him jerking back in time before he collides into the other body. With a step back, his eyes immediately catch sight of the sparkly jacket and they widen almost simultaneously in realization.

Face to face with him was none other than his own mirror, Park Jimin of BTS, only he has honey blond hair and a glowing complexion.

“Ah, I’m really sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.” His eyes are a little wide, stormy grey contacts shining as he apologizes.

For a moment, he’s frozen, stuck rigid in place with shock and split second panic before realizing that he has the safety of his mouth mask and drawn up hood to protect his identity of being the idol’s face stealer. Also the fact that the idol has yet to pass out from shock at seeing his own clone or give any sort of huge reaction was a good indicator.

“A-Ah….” The demon’s voice catches in his throat, and he awkwardly coughs, embarrassed as he ducks his head and mutters gruffly in Korean, “No, it’s my mistake.”

The singer smiles amicably, teeth showing and gaze so warm and so friendly that the demon almost has trouble meeting it.

“Hey now, don’t worry! It’s nothing serious.” There’s a pause, a slight tilt of his honey blond head before those artificial stormy grey irises blink, brows furrowing. The demon starts to actually sweat, eyes refusing to meet as he unconsciously begins to lean back to put space in between. But there’s no escaping the curious gaze of the twenty-four year old singer. “Ah, I— I don’t mean to sound rude or offensive but…. I don’t believe I’ve seen you before?”

Oh shit, shit, shit, shit…

He swears his plan would’ve been completely foolproof if he hadn’t ran into the very person he’s going around parading as. The chances of the demon running into said idol was 1 in 200 and yet it’s as if fate had cursed him with the unwanted luck a fan could only dream of having. But there’s no time to curse heaven and fuck all because his mind begins to race with possibilities of escaping this situation. Maybe he could get away with enthralling the idol for a quick second, trick him into thinking this is all some sort of hallucination from being overworked and then when he’s all good and spaced out, the demon can make his escape. His fingers just about twitches when the singer’s eyes widen and his mouth opens, face alight with an epiphany.

“Are you perhaps new?”

….What?

A beat unknowingly passes between them, with the demon blinking owlishly at the young man, completely gripped in disbelief and the singer staring back expectantly.


“Am I mistaken…?”

The hesitancy creeping into that question snaps the demon from his stupor and he finally blurts out, “No, I’m new.”

Relief washes over the idol’s handsome face (he’s never gonna get over how fucking trippy this is to watch), shoulders visibly losing some tension and the singer even places a hand over his chest.

“Ah, that would’ve been really bad — I usually am able to recognize everyone on the team.” His eyes creases again from the smile forming on his face. “Why haven’t we met yet, um….?”

“Ju—“ The demon stumbles on his words, thinking at the last second that your impromptu Korean name you had given him when he met Jaehee sounded too similar to the idol’s so his mind jumps to the next one he remembers off the top of his head. “— yeon….Kang Juyeon. This is my first day.”

Jimin the idol makes a noise of understanding, presumably taking his sloppy introduction as nerves in good strides. He inclines his head graciously in an almost small bow that catches the demon off-guard. “It’s nice to officially meet you Juyeon-ssi. I look forward to working with you.”

He bows robotically in return.

“Are you on break right now?” The young singer asks innocently.

“…Yes…” The answer comes out unsure, like he’s testing the waters and seeing where this could possibly lead — hopefully with the idol leaving him be and carrying on back to the artist room, surely much too busy to entertain a seemingly nervous new recruit. To his surprise though, the demon is proven wrong.

“Oh! I’m so sorry, I must be taking up your time. Have you gotten anything to drink or eat yet?”

“Well, no but—“

The idol’s mouth gapes open almost immediately, “Would you like to head over to the catering room now? We can grab something.”

The demon is baffled, to say the least; so taken aback by Jimin’s friendly disposition to someone who he only just met that even though he really shouldn’t be overstaying his welcome like this, a part of him would actually feel guilty for turning down the offer. He’s so glad he’s wearing a mask right now because then the idol wouldn’t have to see the borderline crazed smile slowly stretching over the demon’s lips, the disbelief too strong.

But looking at the original owner of the face he wore, seeing it completely reflect a drastically different personality than his own invokes something in him; a morbid curiosity taking hold and stoking the fire to a long buried question —

Who is Park Jimin?

Beyond the worldwide renown Korean idol and a pretty face with killer vocals and dancing, the demon knows very little about who this person is, this person whom you adore so much. What is it that drew you to him specifically amongst the other members. He highly doubts its looks alone (you’re definitely not the shallow type), or maybe even the amount of talent because from what he gathered, all the members were pretty much on par with each other in all departments.

So what made Jimin special?

He really shouldn’t follow this rabbit down the hole, but he’s a demon by nature and impulsivity is practically his middle name. Without another second thought, he agrees with a nod of his head, “Okay.”

Curiosity really should be a sin.

He gets a blinding smile in response, eyes disappearing and pearly teeth on display (he spies the slight crooked front tooth that somehow only seems to add to the singer’s charm rather than a flaw). They walk off towards the room that acts as a communal dining area for the staff and artists themselves, the large selection of hot foods lined up like a buffet self-serve while there are tables available for anyone who wants to sit down for their meal. There’s only a few staff members gathered there, each preoccupied with their phones or simply grabbing a quick bite to eat before rushing back to where they’re needed.

The singer walks in and of the few people that are hanging around, he inclines his head in greeting to them. The demon has no choice but to follow in order to not draw suspicions (even though he gets a few raised eyebrows from wearing a full hood and mask but is ultimately brushed off).

“There’s a lot of choices here so please help yourself. Don’t be shy.” Jimin gestures, grabbing a plate and going for one of the rolls of kimbap. Though the demon has no intention of eating anything — for obvious reasons, he still makes the effort to thoughtlessly pick out random food items to place on his plate for the sake of keeping up the facade. He gets as far as two scoops of sweet and sour pork before the young idol turns to him and his eyes dart to his modest portion.

“Is that all you’re going to eat?”

“Uh…Yes?”

That immediately draws out a noise of disapproval, handsome face pinching along to match the tone. “Ah, Juyeon-ssi; you need to eat to keep up your strength. You can’t hold back on something as important as that.” Before any words of protest can be formed, a kimbap roll is placed on the empty space of the demon’s plate.

And then another.

And then a spring roll.

And then a hefty scoop of black bean noodles and some rice.

It goes on until his plate is adequately full, the idol satisfied as they migrate over to an empty table. The demon takes a seat and he feels his lips quirk as he observes the fact that Jimin’s own plate only consisted of two kimbap rolls and a few pieces of fruit he’s currently nibbling on. The stark contrast and adamancy is already so telling of his character, sans personal dietary considerations.

“Has the job been hard so far?” The singer asks casually.

“Not particularly….”

“Ah, that’s good to hear. Have people been nice to you?”

“Uh…Yeah, I guess.”

He gets a nod of approval, and the demon vaguely likens the feeling of a mother asking their child if their first day of school went well (or if he’s being generous, an older brother). It’s strange experiencing something so familial yet coming from the idol, it all seems so natural as if they’ve known each other for years and not just in the span of less than an hour.

It’s quite the culture shock — something he admittedly doesn’t have a good grasp on and it’s that curiosity to know that has him daringly (or perhaps, no doubt to his colleagues, foolishly) diving deeper. The wooden chopsticks in his hand push around the food on his plate meaninglessly, a gesture meant to disguise the hidden agenda he has; dissecting the idol and seeing what makes him tick.

His lips instinctively quirk under his mask but he makes sure that it doesn’t translate in his gaze as his eyes focus on the idol.

“I’m sure your job is much more tiring.” He says, taking on a tentative tone, implicating for an open ended discussion.

The singer takes a pause, eyes wandering in thought before he sucks in a breath after some serious considerations, “I don’t really think my job is any harder than some of the other staff here…” He stops, as if collecting his thoughts again and then continues, “I think it’s thanks to everyone’s efforts that the members and I are able to do these show successfully and safely. If I were to really break things down…. I really only do a small part.”

“But there’s no point to a show if there’s no performers.”

There’s a hum in reply to his statement but after the idol swallows the strawberry he’s popped into his mouth, he says, “I can see how you would say that, but I think more importantly, there’s no point to a show without the fans.”

The demon doesn’t miss the gentle affection that slips through — that quiet, soft whisper that carries the words near the end, giving way to something much deeper. It’s something he’s seen before, reflected in himself, and it’s whenever his thoughts wander to you.

Fondness.

His chest gives a twinge at the memory, jaw clenching a little as if to physically repress the feelings that begin to stir.

“You don’t even know the fans….” It comes out more as a low murmur to himself, but the contempt underlying his tone seeps through all the same. It’s just…. How could the idol possibly share the same sentiment he has with you, someone who he’s actually spent time with and come to know all the little quirks to — what makes you happy, sad, laugh, the way you laugh, the little noises you make when you eat something you love, see you at your highest and lowest points, with a group of people (not even a single person) who he’s had less than ten seconds worth of interactions?

It’s far too superficial, too scripted and said too many times with no real meaning. He wants to scoff at how impractical it is.

“Maybe so, but it goes beyond that.” The familiar sound of the idol’s lilt halts the demon’s thoughts quite suddenly, still in that soft spoken way but there’s something else with it. A sureness — steady and unwavering, and just the barest hints of….passive-aggressiveness?

That gets a quirk in the eyebrow; so this kitten does have claws after all.

“There are times where I wonder why there are so many people who like us and support us the way they do.” The singer continues seriously, already getting lost in deep thought. “Probably because we work hard, but who doesn’t work hard? Others make good music and do their best too so why us? We try our best to communicate to our fans but everyone does too…..These sorts of things are something I often think about.”

A pause, as if to find the right words, “But whenever I read the fan’s letters or things they post on SNS to us, saying how much we’ve helped them with our songs when they’re going through a hard time, it makes me realize that we’re not so different. We all have flaws and maybe it’s because we’re not perfect that they like us. Starting off with nothing and then little by little, seeing more people coming to support us…. They’re the ones who put us on the stage, so I— We cherish them a lot. They give us energy and comfort us, and we do the same back, like a deep connection, an understanding.”

The young singer stops in pushing around the remaining strawberry on his plate, a ghost of a smile tugging on his lips, like he’s recalling a particularly pleasant memory. “So we want to give back by making good music and showing them our best. Ah, reminds of something really cool Namjoon-hyung said.” He takes the time to tilt his head, “He said how even if it’s just one person he could help, he’ll continue to keep trying. That really touched me, so even if we might not know them personally, they’re the ones who motivate us and makes all of this worth it.”

Once he finishes, the demon is left a little more than bewildered, overwhelmed in fact that all he could do was blink. Granted, it was a lot to take in, never having expected such an arduous confession but what’s even more baffling to him is the conviction the singer had saying all of it, so earnest in his words. Now, he’s no lie detector per se, but as a demon, he does have a more innate ability to pick up on cues and inflections that would give a person away, revealing their true nature. He’s used to it after all.

And then along comes Park Jimin.

This twenty-four some odd year old idol, thrusted into the cut-throat world that is the entertainment industry, young and bright-eyed, armed with nothing but potential, a good work ethic and a dream, yet comes out on the other side, a little bruised and scathed but otherwise, un-jaded; that young and bright-eyed innocence not diminished, instead it matured into something more resilient.

He can probably count on his finger how many people he can actually say that about. Hell, the only closest people that would qualify would be saints, and even that is debatable.

It’s....irritating because he’s faced with the fact that as much as he had wanted to dislike this person, he’s proven that he can’t.

A rush of air leaves his nose and he has to contain a rueful smile. “You’re a very admirable person Park Jimin-ssi. Not that many people keep to their beliefs so strongly like that.”

He gets a bashful giggle in return, light and melodic.

“Aish, what are you saying? I’m not all that impressive….I think I still have a lot to learn.” The singer almost whines from behind the back of his hand covering the open mouth smile he has. Once he calms, it softens. “All I really want is for the fans to remember BTS for our sincerity. I just hope that I’ve been able to help convey that so far.”

The demon lets out a breathy chuckle, finally getting up from his seat. He gazes down at this young man who’s face reflects his own yet wears it in such an entirely different way — glowing with a passion and radiance that is warm, sincere, kind, compassionate and loving.

Perhaps the way it’s meant to be worn.

And it’s with a bittersweet reluctance that the demon places a hand on the singer’s shoulder, giving it a gentle reassuring squeeze. “Keep doing what you’re doing and never lose sight of yourself. As long as you remember what you’re doing this for, the sincerity of your members and you will be conveyed.”

Stormy grey eyes widen a fraction, a little confused as they blink up at him, clearly not expecting such encouragements (honestly, he didn’t expect this either yet here he is).

“Wh— Um, I—…” The idol reaches a hand up to comb through his meticulously styled hair, tousling a few loose strands as slowly, the apples of his cheeks begin to dust in a pink hue and dark eyes can’t help but watch on in amusement. As if sensing the focus shifting to his quickly reddening face however, the young man lets out a sputter and lightly smacks the demon’s forearm, refusing to meet his gaze. “Ahh Juyeon-ssi! What’s with you saying that all of a sudden to me? You sound as if you’re way older than me when we’re probably friends in age!”

Friends…

“What makes you think that?”

“W-Well… I don’t know how to explain it but…. I feel a sense of familiarity with you when we met. Like, a vibe….” The sentence pewters out into a shy mumble, the tips of his ears matching his cheeks now before comically, grey orbs whip up, suddenly concerned. “Unless you’re not….?”

The snort that leaves the demon’s mouth is quickly covered by clearing his throat but he’s sure the restrained mirth still reaches his eyes as he assures, “No, we’re friends.”

He’s met with a brilliant grin, full of teeth and a twinkle in his gaze. “Oh thank goodness. I would’ve died on the spot out of embarrassment.”

He refrains from rolling his eyes if only to dismiss the overly-dramatic relief that overcame the poor young man. But regardless, it’s his cue to go — he's starting to feel a little too perturbed being near someone so good-natured. With a final pat to his shoulder, the demon begins to depart.

“It was nice talking to you Park Jimin-ssi but you’ll have to excuse me, I have to get going now.”

“O-Oh? Is it really that time? If that’s the case— Ya! Kang Juyeon-ssi! Did you even touch your food? You—!”

“Jimin-hyung!”

“Oh?” Jimin’s attention whips to the new voice that called him from the still full plate of food left on the table. His eyes immediately meet doe-eyed ones, usually dark as coal but are currently a more lighter coffee colour, bringing out more of the brown that’s hidden in its depths thanks to the contacts. The youngest member approaches him with long strides, the sequins on his own stage outfit glitter with each step.

“This is where you were? Should’ve told me you were hungry, we could’ve gone to snack together.”

“Ah, no I was just talking with Juyeon-ssi.”

“Juyeon? Who’s that?”

“Kang Juyeon; that person who was just leaving, you must’ve seen him on your way in.”

But that only gets a head tilt from Jungkook, who swivels his head back towards the entrance, “He doesn’t sound familiar and I didn’t see anyone leaving.”

“….Huh?” Equally confused, Jimin swerves around the tall form of Jungkook to get a look however, to his surprise, he doesn’t see anyone. Glancing around lets him know that at most, there was only three other people in the room, excluding him and Jungkook but they were all immersed on the couch in the far corner, away from the entryway. Does Juyeon walk that fast?  “Aye, quit messing with me. He had on a face mask, around my height? With his hoodie pulled up; probably the only one here who does too.”

Jungkook shakes his head, genuinely clueless on who Jimin could possibly be referring to. “No, I swear I haven’t seen anyone around like that.”

The furrow in Jimin’s brows deepen, mouth falling open in disbelief. The scrunched up, troubled expression the older member makes was too good to pass up on teasing so Jungkook can’t help but to lean close, voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper.

“What? Were you speaking to a ghost this entire time hyung?”

“Aish! Don’t say that! That actually gave me chills!” Jimin scowls, smacking the youngest repeatedly on the arm and causing Jungkook to cackle and skip away from the assault.

“Anyways, Namjoon-hyung wants to go over the script again so I went to go find you.”

“Oh, okay. Let’s go then.”

Brushing down his jacket, Jimin gets up, taking both plates with him, discarding his own empty one while Jungkook gleefully takes the one Juyeon hadn’t touched. The two head out and begin to make their way back to the artist dressing room, with Jungkook talking around mouthfuls of food about what Jimin had apparently missed while he was away but all Jimin could think about was his meeting with Juyeon.

There’s no way he could’ve imagined it all in his head — he’s too young to be going senile. Plus, it felt too real for it to be some overworked hallucination (besides, he doesn’t feel that jet lagged). So there’s a perfectly, logical explanation for it. Yeah, he just…walks really fast.

“Jimin-hyung is here!” Jungkook calls out to the rest of the members. He gets a myriad of boisterous responses and greetings. The sound makes him inadvertently grin.

“Yeah, yeah I’m coming. I didn’t think you would miss me that badly; I was gone for ten minutes.”

Thoughts of his mysterious friend are pushed away for some other time but the wise words he’s been given remain at the forefront of Jimin’s mind. Perhaps the next time he runs into Juyeon, he’ll treat him to a drink or two during the celebratory dinners — get to know him better.

He’s not sure what it is about Juyeon that makes him want to befriend him so intently, like there’s something about him….

Something that’s a little melancholy….and maybe, he dare say, a little lonely.

But to the singer’s dismay, he never really did see him again.

[fizzingwizard]

Episode 6 was AWESOME. Finally it really and truly felt like Digimon Adventure!!

This episode plus the last one makes me eat my words of despair over the blandness of episode 4. I’m counting that one as just a miss. I’m hoping that it doesn’t bode for the tone they’ll take with all Sora episodes though. Sora’s easy to overlook because she’s already kind, brave, and responsible - the main things the other kids need to work on. Still she never bored me in old Adventure. I only ever wanted more of her and that was my hope for 2020 Sora. Her intro episode wasn’t a great start, but guess what, she got to be pretty darn cool in this episode, and overall the tone of this ep was such an improvement on ep 4 that I’m back to thinking we will absolutely get a modern, cool girl Sora who rocks her spotlight episodes in the future. Pray with me friends.

By the way we finally got some decent animation in this episode. So I took gratuitous Taichi pics and I’ll post a couple to start us off bahahaha

Okay, so this was the much-awaited MIMI episode. Heck yeah. It’s called “The Targeted Kingdom.” Who is the queen of the kingdom, I’ll give you three guesses, eh what’s that Mimi? like WOW you got it on the first try!

More below!!

^ So I’m not quite sure what’s going on here. I think Sora is standing on Taichi’s back and Piyomon is helping lift her (them?) up into the trees so Sora can look around? They are trying to find the way to the ocean. This seems like the most awkward way possible to go about it but you do you kiddo...

See, Adventure Taichi would be making jokes while this is happening. 2020 Taichi is thinking about The Big Picture, at least as much of it as he knows of. He’s turning into such a pensive type. Yamato’s gonna have to work hard to keep his lead brooder status.

Also I was thinking... there’s a few times in this ep, and more in others, where I feel like the animators don’t show us enough... Idk what to call it, movement? The fall out of actions? Like why don’t we see them climb into the tree? Why are we zoomed into so close when they fall out? Later during the big fight scene, there’s stuff going on that could definitely be shown in a clearer, and also cooler to watch, way. My theory of course is it’s all budget issues but what a bummer.

The kids’ first intro to the bottomless pit that is a Digimon’s stomach. They have no food (seriously? in that pack of emergency supplies Sora brought by pure happenstance there is NO food??) so they go... steal some. But they don’t know they’re stealing.

Not that SHE cares.

Mimi: Bahaha... you’ve fallen into my trap! *cutest maniacal laugh ever*

^The trap

There is another trap that comes later in the ep and I’ll just say here. It’s some Jessie & James level shit. Way to go Meems!

ugh soooo cuuuute I want twenty

Introducing... Queen Mimi! Yes, Queen. They’ve upgraded her!

Honestly, I love how she’s introduced as royalty, but she’s dressed as a cowgirl. No one would ever ask Mimi to pick just one theme. Like her kimchi fried rice with whipped cream and strawberries, Mimi is not afraid to mix genres!

Like I said, the animation in this ep is a cut above what’s it been recently, which is a relief. And everyone’s appearance is so much like Adventure that I wonder why they changed anything xD But I’m just so grateful everyone kept their unique eyes. It was the one thing I missed in the animation of Tri, even though I wouldn’t have wanted high school kids to have baby eyes. But the eyes really highlighted each character’s individuality. Glad that’s still a thing even if not every animator pays attention to it.

Taichi & Sora: Were those your fruit trees? Uhh sorry? My Digimon was close to death and we were starving...

Mimi: You will starve again unless you learn the meaning of the law!

that’s a little les mis interlude for ya youre welcome

So Mimi arrived in the digital world, separated from the others, and immediately became Queen of the Tanemon. I SENSE A TREND.

Mimi doesn’t come across as ditzy and selfish as she did in early Adventure. I am not sure if that side of her’s been erased in favor of simply making her reluctant to fight because she’s soft-hearted, or if we’ll see her self-centeredness appear later on. I hope so. Right now the 2020 story is very focused on the plot and not on the children’s growth, which is a huge departure from Adventure, but I don’t think it will remain that way. I hope not at least. But I do think it’s possible that they’ll rewrite Mimi to be a bit less self-centered and/or airheady, and I’m not exactly against that. After all, post-Adventure Mimi showed her cool side more when she was willful or opinionated, and I’m on board with more of that in the 2020 show too. A better balance would definitely be a good thing in Mimi’s case.

She kind of made me think of Sailor Moon in this episode, lol

GASP! We are all Chosen Children! Mimi immediately says NOOO WAY i’m queen of the Tanemon!! But not because the Tanemon are catering to her every whim (they’re not, as far as I can tell! Though they did make her a throne!). Because she honestly feels a responsibility to look after them. Again, pretty different from old Adventure.

Pocket Koushirou returns and Taichi tries to absorb him into his brain!!

Taichi: *grunting* HNNNNGGGG!! Give me me your curiosity!!!

Koushirou: Are you Vademon!?!?!

Koushirou shows video footage from the human world that shows the effect the power outage is having. Though it’s not a complete blackout yet, some places like hospitals have already lost power and are in trouble. 

Mimi sees her grandfather, the president of Tachikawa Industries, on the TV helping people in trouble. VERY DIFFERENT. VERY COOL. I approve

Koushirou also points out that there is INDEED a time lapse between the human and digital worlds. I’m not exactly sure how different the time lapse is from old Adventure. At first, I thought it was much smaller, but thinking about it... given how slow the video from the human world was moving, it might be sizable. But I don’t think it’s as big as old Adventure. At any rate, Taichi and Sora figure out this means Mimi was on her own with Palmon and the Tanemon village for longer than they realized.

Also makes me wonder just how much time Yamato’s spent in the digital world...

Mimi feels torn between wanting to help her grandfather and needed to protect the Tanemon village! Naturally Taichi suggests they work together!

And a Tanemon rudely kicks him in the face!! Just kidding. But it was too cute not to cap

Mimi brings the waterworks like three or four times this episode.

Mimi: Alright! You work for me now!

Taichi: ...??? Okay I guess????

Yes, Princess or Queen, Mimi is still Mimi <3

So they join up and uhh... get ready for war I guess??

I MEAN HOW CUTE IS THAT

So this is the second Team Rocket trap, a giant hole in the ground. How did they dig it? How did the build that raft two eps ago?? Inquiring minds want to know

Greymon is surprisingly limber for a chubby dinosaur.

Taichi does what he does best in battle scenes: stand in immediate danger and look up a dinosaur’s bum.

OGREMON MAKES HIS BIG APPEARANCE IN A MIMI EP. I totally called it last week. Okay, technically he already appeared in episode 5... but we barely saw him okay! He uses Soundbirdmon (who may indeed not be sentient?) to mind-control other Digimon to find and apparently kill?? the children. Ogremon honestly sounds kind of mind-controlled himself but not sure. If he is, it’s a different kind of control. He may just talk like that because he’s an ogre and not very articulate...

I guess I capped this because CUTE CUTE CUTE

So speaking of rushing into immediate danger... Not only is Sora right in the middle of the right, she’s HANGING OFF BIRDRAMON’S LEG. This show is SO not promoting child safety hahahhahaha

Cute Taichi. Cuter still - Taichi and Sora tag teaming it. PLEEEEEASE give me more of this!! I want nothing more than for Sora to join Taichi and Yamato as a heavy-hitter. I always headcanoned her that way growing up. Let Sora kick ass 2020!!

^Palmon’s method of rescuing Mimi... effective, yet questionable

Capped because Cute.

Sora and Birdramon take down the blue bird digimon (sorry... forgot its name... will likely forget the name of every other Digimon not from old Adventure as well. i am a senior citizen). Taichi cheers for them and says “You nabbed the best bit from me!” SO CUTE. Come on, they are the best team!!

Meanwhile, Palmon: *screams bloody murder*

Mimi: Palmon! Noooo!

Episode 6: Palmon friggin DIES

I mean she is like glitching in and out. So it totally FIGURES it would be a Mimi ep that tells us “yeah kids we’re not Pokemon!” I mean. Keep watching...

Mimi recalls being all alone in a strange world when she meets Palmon. Btw they totally revamped the Pyokomon Village for this Tanemon village, I dig.

EVOLUUUUUTION!!

Boxing!!! Cactus!!! Eat this Precure!!!!

While Togemon takes out Drimogemon, Greymon rushes in to protect the kids from Ogremon...

... AND FREAKING SAWS HIS HORN OFF.

Like I said. THIS AIN’T POKEMON, KIDS.

Isn’t this actually darker than old Adventure? I mean I guess at least no one dies (I think? uhh...) and I suppose that’s less dark... but sawing off body parts... Idk man... I’m down with it, I just don’t know that it’s any nicer than old Adventure... hahahaha

POW! Err, Drimogemon’s drill ain’t looking too good either...

More waterworks as Mimi tells Palmon she loves her, and Palmon says it right back. Foreshadowing for Mimi/Koushirou tiffs in the future!? It was lit last ep that Koushirou tried to say he loves his partner and choked on it. Something tells me these two are gonna butt heads again ;)

Ugggggghhhh so cute I can’t staaaaaaand ittttt

Mimi decides to go with Taichi and Sora and leave the Tanemon village, Idk, I guess they’ll be safe now???  at least they won’t be targeted for having a human child among them.

Also I like her leaf bag. The Tanemon totally made it for her.

We end with Ogremon gripping his broken horn and fricking sobbing. This... does not bode well.

I want to hug him

so cast your votes, who gets the first hurt/comfort scene with Ogremon? Will it be gentle chastisement from Mimi while she patches him up with stuff from Sora’s pack? Or will it be Jou and the toilet paper you know he brought even if it makes no sense?!? hahahaha

I give this ep a 7/10 WELL DONE. That’s what a Digimon episode should be. Very close to VERY VERY GOOD.

I missed the trailer for next week so have more gratuitous Taichis instead.

[choicesfanatic86]

Through the Storm: Part 1

DISCLAIMER:      All characters belong to Pixelberry Studios, except characters  unique to my story.  Those belong to me. ;)

PAIRINGS:  Riley (MC) x OC, Riley (MC) x Liam, Liam x Riley (MC) x OC, Olivia x Drake, Bertrand x Savannah, Maxwell x OC

SUMMARY: Riley Lawson returned to New York a broken version of herself after a failed whirlwind romance.  Years later, she has put the past behind her and rebuilt herself into a successful event planner who is happily enjoying her fast-paced New York lifestyle.  However, just because she’s put the past behind her, doesn’t mean it won’t come back to haunt her.  When an unexpected letter turns up on her doorstep, she’s forced to face the people and feelings she ran away from all those years ago.

Please check out my MASTERLIST.

PERMANENT TAG LIST:  @umccall71​ @drakelover78​ @jamielea81 @bobasheebaby​ @speedyoperarascalparty @hopefulmoonobject​ @theroyalweisme @gardeningourmet​ @jlouise88 @hamulau​ @traeumerinwitzhelden​ @blackcatkita​ @mrs-simmy​ @kaitycole​ @alwaysthebestchoice @mfackenthal​ @trr-duchessofvaltoria @pbchoicesobsessed @liamxs-world @flyawayboo​ @devineinterventions2​ @ranishajay​ @jayjay879​​ @alepowell @greyeyedsmile14​​ @mspaigemoore​​ @princesaakl @annekebbphotography @angelicfangirl  @katurrade​ @cordoniaqueensworld​ @ao719 @kingliam2019​  @custaroonie​ @lovemychoices​ @texaskitten30 @harlequinash @smalltalk88  @pixieferry @thatspicegirlssong 

Tag List for TTS Only:  @herladyshipxx  @captainkingliam  @cocomaxley @queencatherynerhys​ @spetstoof​ @grapefrults @pessimystic-fangirl @dralenamax @hhiggs @penguininapinktuxedo @topsyturvy-dream @diamond-dreamland @pnhanga @ladynonsense​ @mrsdrakewalkerblog @crookedslimecreatorpasta @liamxs-world​ @flowerpowell​ @bruteforcebears @withice​ @jared2612​ @darley1101​ @sleeplessescapades @leelee10898 @craftytacotrashdream​ @eileendannie​ @bella-ca @x0valkyrie​ @sunandlemons​

11/26/29 - Here we go again.  I bet you’re wondering why I’m rewriting/revamping TTS? Five months ago I got a critique about TTS saying that the reader felt it wasn’t realistic enough.  For them, things felt rushed and kind of disjointed (examples they gave were the beginning/agreeing to go to the wedding; glossing over Drake/Olivia’s relationship; Riley’s relationship with Paul; Maxwell and Andy’s engagement.  I’ll admit, my heart hurt a little because I had put so much time and energy into it and had been getting so much positive feedback that I kind of got blindsided by that critique. With everything that was going on in my life, I kind of just ignored it and moved on thinking that I’d address it when I had more time.  Of course, I didn’t really get back into writing again until recently.  So, I took the opportunity to reread TTS and I found that the reader who shall remain anonymous (lol!) was correct.  It was rushed . . . I did do a disservice to such awesome characters like Paul and Andy and Maxwell and even Olivia!  So I’m gonna do right by this critique and rework it so that it is a bit more realistic.

So?  What does that mean?  The plot is going to change.  Eek! I know.  Scary.  But the general premise will remain the same.  Plot twist - I already have the ending written and that won’t change.  But Riley’s time in Cordonia will be a bit different. :)

I really hope you guys decide to continue to follow along!

If you want to be removed from the tag or be tagged, please message me! :)

                                          PART 1 - LIFE GOES ON

“Oh my goodness,” I whispered.  “Roxy, you’re a magician,” I sighed as I inhaled the delightful cinnamon aroma permeating from my warm cup of cappuccino.

Roxy winked at me.  “I know what my best customer likes,” she chuckled.  “It’s been ages since you’ve swung by for a visit.  I had to make it just perfect for you.”

I smiled brightly at the owner of the coffee shop.  Roxy’s Coffee Shop had become a second home to me over the last two years.  I had stumbled across it back in college when I first came home to New York.  I was in between mid-term exams and needed somewhere to decompress before heading back to campus and happened upon this little hole in the wall café.  It was love at first sight.  Sure, there were a bunch of mainstream coffee shops scattered across the city, but there was just something that drew you in at Roxy’s.  For one, they had the coziest little set up going on.  The lighting is dimmed just right and the chairs are extra cozy – which is perfect when you want to get lost in a good book or in my case a really tough crossword puzzle.  Another thing?  Roxy makes THE best cup of cappuccino this side of the Hudson River.  I couldn’t count how many times I found myself huddled in a corner sipping a cup of Roxy’s perfectly brewed coffee after a long day of classes.

And that’s just where I am today – snuggled in a plush, brown chair at the far corner of the shop, steaming cappuccino in one hand and the New York Times in the other.  This was the life.  I brought the cup of cappuccino to my lips, savoring the delicious taste as I sipped it slowly.  “I’ve missed this,” I sighed happily.  “I’m sorry I haven’t been around as much,” I offered.  “Business has been crazy, and . . . well . . .you know how it goes when you’re your own boss,” I explained.

“Do I ever . . .” Roxy agreed.  “Stay as long as you like.  I’ll be sure to have Gus bring you a refill when you’re done,” she smiled.

“Best Barista Ever,” I exclaimed.

“Just you today or is that handsome hunk of man joining you?”  Roxy asked waggling her eyebrows.

“Just me,” I laughed.  “Paul’s in Boston.”

“Too bad,” Roxy winked at me.  “I’ll leave you to it,” she motioned toward the crossword puzzle page in front of me.  “Mmhmm, she chuckled.  Only girl I know that does the New York Times Crossword in pen,” she shook her head as she went off to tend to another customer.

Sighing, I leaned back into the chair getting myself comfortable.  Roxy had been right.  I hadn’t stopped by in at least a month.  After all, it had been just as long since I had an actual day off.  I was about due for some nice rest and relaxation.  When Alicia offered to do my consults for the day, I jumped at the opportunity to breakaway for a little while.  I was going a bit stir crazy in the four walls of my office.  Don’t get me wrong, I loved my job and I loved being my own boss even more, but I seemed to constantly be moving at the speed of light.  I started Savvy Events right out of college and despite the rocky start I had trying to get it off the ground, things have been booming every since.  

I loved the hustle and bustle of my fast-paced life.  My weekends were spent planning and coordinating some of the trendiest events in New York City.  So I wasn’t planning parties for the Kardashians just yet, but I did plan a party for one of the girls from Sex and the City once and it got featured in Glossy magazine.  That was pretty epic.  Mostly though, I found myself catering to high-end business professionals who were just too busy to plan parties themselves – corporate galas, year-end celebrations, weddings.  You name it; I pretty much could plan it.  My weekdays were just as busy – filled with client meetings, scouting visits, and designing sessions.  It wasn’t easy, but it kept me busy, the money was great, and I was really, really good at my job – if I do say so myself.  

Admittedly, there were times when I missed how much downtime I used to have.  I sometimes longed for the days when I could randomly decide to wander aimlessly around the city and discover all of the little idiosyncrasies that New York had to offer.  But the Riley back then didn’t have as much responsibilities as I do now.  Man, just thinking about how much has changed over the years makes me nostalgic for life pre-business.  I’ve come quite a long way from the days when I was waiting tables at that dingy little bar out in Brooklyn.  I couldn’t help but smile when I thought about all the late night shifts I spent working at Upscale.  I snorted at the memory.  Upscale . . . what a totally misleading name.  There was absolutely nothing upscale about that crummy, little bar.  The patrons were a bit too touchy, and my manager Craig was a giant ass.  It wasn’t all bad though.  My coworkers were fun and the tips were a dream, especially when I was trying to save up enough money to get back into college.  And if it wasn’t for that oh so glamorous waitressing gig . . . my life would have turned out pretty differently.  Hell, I never would have met him.  Had I not picked up that last party the night he walked into the bar, I never would have met the man that turned my life upside down.  I never would have had the opportunity to cross off so many items on my bucket list.  I never would have gotten to see the world outside of my tiny little studio in Brooklyn.  I never would have fallen in love.

Ouch.  Let’s not go there.  It had been months since I had even thought about him. I closed my eyes at the thought, clinging onto my cup just a tad bit tighter.  My heart had a slight twinge . . . of pain?  Regret maybe?  I shook my head, mentally chiding myself for letting myself go there again.  I was doing so well.  What had it been three months since I last thought about him?  Or them?  That had to be some sort of record.  They say time heals all wounds, and I was slowly starting to believe it.  It had been two years since everything had happened, and I refused to allow myself to ever be that weak again.  I’ll never let myself revert to the girl I was back then.  I came back to New York a ghost of my former self.  I remember feeling like the aching heartbreak would stay with me forever.  I thought that I would be doomed to a life of wallowing in my never-ending grief.

It still amazes me that I was somehow able to pick up the pieces of my broken life and glue them back together again.  It was a long and hard road that took many months, but here I am . . . almost as good as new.  Were the fractures still there?  Oh yes, of course.  Once something was broken, you couldn’t just pretend that it hadn’t shattered into a million pieces.  The cracks of my former life . . . as much as it killed me to still admit it . . . were still dancing along the surface of my rebuilt life . . . although faded they were still very much a reminder of everything that happened all those years ago.  

God, how tragically sappy.  The buzzing of my cell phone thankfully interrupted my thoughts.  Looking down, I saw my boyfriend’s name flash onto the screen.  I couldn’t help but smile.  Here I was dwelling on the past when my future was calling.  Paul had been away for the last three weeks facilitating a corporate merger between two well known companies.  Headquarters for both companies were based in Boston, and although his law firm was centered in New York City, they wanted him to go out and meet the clients directly in their neck of the woods.  He’d been flying in and out of Boston for the last few months.  I missed him something fierce when he was away, but we’d been getting by through countless text messages and many FaceTime sessions.

“Hi, Handsome,” I answered.  “I wasn’t expecting to hear from you until later today,” I murmured.

“Hey, Gorgeous, I know . . . but I just couldn’t let a whole morning go by without hearing your voice,” he responded.

“Well, lucky me then,” I smiled.  

“Luck you indeed because I also happen to have a surprise for you,” he said.

“Ooh,” I hummed.  “What kind of surprise?” I could feel my smile grow wider.  Paul was something special . . . he was funny . . . sweet . . . caring and oh so thoughtful.  He spoiled me.  A lot.  And I didn’t know exactly what I did to deserve snagging a guy like him, but I was certainly thankful for whatever powers that be that found us winding up together.

“Guess who was able to book an earlier flight and is flying in to see you in exactly three hours?” He said in a sing-song voice.

I was grinning so big my cheeks were starting to hurt.  “Shut up!” I exclaimed.  “Paul, that’s the best news I’ve heard all day.  And you know what?  You’re just in time for movie night,” I almost squealed.  “They just haven’ been the same without you these last few weeks,” I laughed thinking about what it’s been like him without the last few weeks.  I had used my best friend Andy as my stand-in date and she was less than thrilled at my movie selections.  “I’ve had to resort to spending movie nights with Andy and you know how that goes,” I chuckled.

“Oh, I have a funny inkling about how that went down.”  He chuckled.  “Let me guess, she demanded it be a sci-fi flick?”

I groaned.  “YES!” I exclaimed.  “She tried to get me to watch Deep Impact three times,” I sighed.  “I told her that I had no desire to watch a movie about a giant asteroid pummeling down to Earth, but she scoffed when I suggested Legally Blonde,” I said with a slight chuckle in my voice.  

Andy had been the first friend I made when I moved back to New York.  We found ourselves in the same creative writing class at Hudson University and instantly bonded over our love for all things French.  Before you knew it, we were inseparable.  I loved her to bits and pieces, but she drove me absolutely crazy.  For every similarity we had, there were at least two differences.  For one, I was an absolute neat freak . . . whereas Andy seemed to leave a trail of clutter wherever she went.  Even our taste in movies differed astronomically.  Andy was all about action-packed sci-fi thrillers, whereas I leaned more toward the cheesy romantic comedies.  Despite our differences, and me wanting to throttle her a time or two, she and I became tremendous friends, and I absolutely, positively couldn’t imagine what life would be without her.

“Let’s just say that last movie night resulted in a full blown popcorn fight,” I laughed.  “That I ended up cleaning all by myself,” I sighed.  “There were many a moment I wanted to shove a handful of popcorn in her mouth just to keep her mouth busy,” I chuckled.  I paused for a moment, before clearing my throat.  “It’s been a long few weeks, Paul.  I’ve missed you,” she murmured.

“I’ve missed you so much, too, baby.  Remind me not to leave you this long again. Next time, I’m packing you up with me,” he laughed

I grabbed the newspaper and threw it in my tote bag.  “Careful … I just might hold you to it.”

I glanced down at my watch and was a bit surprised with how much time had flown by.  “Ah damn, if you’re coming home in a few hours I should head back to my apartment.  Get things cleaned up a bit.  Maybe we can do dinner at Russo’s tonight if you aren’t too jetlagged?  Then maybe catch up on all our movie nights we missed while you were gone?”  I asked hopefully.

“Anything you want, babe.  I honestly don’t care what we do as long as I get to see your gorgeous face.”  

I could feel my cheeks grow hot at his compliment.  This guy.  My God, was he a sweet talker or what?  I got that our relationship was still in the honeymoon stage so to speak – we had only been exclusively dating for eight months after all, but man, did he know how to sweep a girl off her feet or what?  Butterflies?  Nope, I had full blown moths fluttering around in there, and somehow, he also managed to make me go weak in the knees each time I saw him.  

Admittedly, I wasn’t exactly keen on the idea of going out with him at first, but I’m very glad that he was able to wear me down eventually.  Yeah, the frequent trips to Boston were hard, but we were making it work.  And surprisingly, we hadn’t even had a single disagreement since we first started dating.  Our relationship was easy.  Comfortable even.  And well . . . normal.  God, how I craved normalcy.  Those were things that I never had with him.  Then again, I don’t think there was anything really normal about my relationship with him.  Ugh.  I’m doing it again.  Just stop.

Paul’s voice broke through my internal struggle.  “There’s ah … something I wanted to talk to you about, too.  Been thinking a lot about it while on the trip, and was hoping to run it by you today.”

“Oh?  Okay, that sounds good,” I replied, as I waved a quick goodbye to Roxy.  “I’ll see you in a few, babe,” I smiled as I tapped the end on my phone and left Roxy’s Coffee Shop.  

The trek back home wouldn’t take me long as I only lived a few blocks away.  There was so much I needed to do before he got in, but I was pretty excited to see Paul.  FaceTime was great, but nothing could replace seeing him in person or hearing his laugh right across from me.  We had met about a year after I returned to New York.  I had finally picked myself back up and moved on from my time in Cordonia.  I had reenrolled in college, finished my last semester and earned my Bachelor’s Degree in Business. Shortly after I graduated, I went to my local credit union and asked for a loan to start up my own business.  It was a gigantic risk at the time – after all, I had no backup plan if I failed miserably.  They started me off with a modest loan which I used to get the foundation of Savvy Events created.  Even with the loan, money was tight.  To cut down costs, I was working out of my apartment with only a single laptop and my design book.  

Paul’s law firm was one of my very first clients.  I’d been hired to coordinate an event honoring the firm’s newest partner – Paul.  When I went in to meet with him for the initial consultation, I found myself surprisingly attracted to him.  I hadn’t dated anyone since . . . well since Cordonia, and it wasn’t like I was looking to date again.  My heart was pretty shut off from jumping into ANY relationship, and when I met Paul and felt a little spark, I tried my best to snuff it out.  I didn’t NEED a relationship and I certainly didn’t WANT one.  Especially after the shitshow that had happened back in Cordonia, but there was something about Paul that kept drawing me in . . . even though I wanted none of it.  Paul was tall, slender with touches of gray in his dark hair.  He was just under ten years older than me, and he had an air of sophistication that was very fitting of a corporate attorney.  I tried my best to ignore the growing attraction between us.  It was my first major gig and I could not screw it up by being attracted to the guest of honor.  That would be a big no-no.  I wanted to keep things professional.  I also didn’t want my newly pieced back together heart, broken again.  I tried so hard to pretend that there wasn’t anything between us . . . but each meeting had me falling a lot more in like with him than I wanted.  He was sweet, charismatic and genuinely interested in knowing more about me.  That’s why, I wasn’t all too surprised that when the party was over he had asked me out to dinner and wouldn’t accept no for an answer.  

I agreed to a single dinner and made it clear that I wasn’t looking for anything serious.  I didn’t go into a lot of detail, but just gave him the rundown that my heart had been smashed to smithereens and there was no way in hell I was going to fall down that black hole again.  He was oh so patient and understood completely.  That single dinner turned into a standing weekly date which then turned into frequent movie nights throughout the week.  Eight months later, I’m still in major like with him.  LIKE.  Not love . . . I mean, yes, there have been moments when he does something so amazingly, sweet that I go all heart-eyes on him . . . but love . . . yeah, no.  Thanks to him, I don’t really think I can ever “love” someone so freely again.  If there was anything that I learned from my time in Cordonia it’s that love is a four letter word that makes you weak . . . and I’d be damned if I would allow myself to get swept up in that whirlwind again.

After wrestling with my thoughts, I found myself standing on the front stoop of my apartment building.  It was the typical New York City brick-built walk up.  It was in a pretty good area near a lot of shops and markets.  It was also ridiculously close to the subway making it so easy to find yourself in any one of the other boroughs of the city.  Because of that it was obscenely expensive.  I mean, two bedroom apartments in New York are already obscenely expensive, but one in close proximity to the subway typically broke the bank.  Thank God for Andy.  Without her splitting of the rent, we never would have been able to afford something in this area.

I climbed up the three flights of stairs to my apartment unit, all the while, butterflies floated around happily in my stomach.  My mind raced to what I was going to wear to our early dinner tonight.  It also drifted to what Paul wanted to talk to me about.  He seemed a bit vague about it.

“Hey,” I said happily as I walked through the front door.  I threw my keys onto the island in the kitchen.  Andy was sitting on the floor furiously typing away on her laptop.  Papers were strewn all around her in different piles.  

“How’s the thesis going?” I asked, eyeing a few of the crumpled, wadded up paper next to her.

Andy stretched her arms over her head, yawning.  “I’ve been at this since seven this morning and got all of one page done.  You tell me.”  She snorted.  

Andy was an English major who had earned her Bachelor’s Degree two semesters ago.  Her educational goals were much loftier than my own.  She wanted her PhD.  I just wanted to get the hell out of school.  It had already taken me a bit longer than expected to get my degree, and I didn’t have the funds or drive to continue any further beyond my BA.  

Andy was in her second semester of Hudson’s Literary Studies MA program, and I didn’t envy her in the slightest.  While my life had become consumed with all things Savvy Events, her life was consumed by her thesis.  I didn’t understand why someone would willingly spend so many hours of their life working on a paper that could either make or break your educational endeavors, especially when there was going to be more schooling and papers waiting for her on the other side of her MA.  She’d still have at least four more years in her doctoral program.  I internally cringed at even the thought of it.  Andy had mentioned a few times that she’d probably have to move out of state to pursue the PhD program that she wanted.  I didn’t even want to think about what that meant for our friendship.  

Andy had been my saving grace when I first moved back to New York.  And if I were being honest, she was the only friend I had for quite a while upon returning.  When I had come home to New York, a lot of my college friends had graduated and moved out of state.  Even my old coworkers at Upscale had found new jobs and moved on with their lives.  A lot changes in six months.  I was left in a state of limbo, not really having anywhere to go or anyone to turn to.  Meeting Andy was a blessing that I so desperately needed at a time when I wasn’t really sure what to do with my life.  

I never really told Andy what happened to land me back in New York, and being the godsend that she is, she never pushed or pried.  I vaguely mentioned that I had been traveling out of the country for a while, and she assumed that I had been a part of some foreign exchange program.  She never prodded and I never corrected her because . . . well . . . talking about Cordonia . . . and him . . . would just reopen the wounds that had taken so very long to heal.  I wanted a clean break from all things Cordonian.  I left no contact number or forwarding address.  I wanted them to forget I ever existed, and to be honest, I wanted to forget they had ever existed, too.  

“Hey, one page is better than nothing right?”  I popped open the refrigerator grabbing a soda can out of it.  “Want one?”  I said as I held up a can to offer Andy.

“I’m good.  I’m wired on three cups of coffee right now.  I don’t think my body can handle any more caffeine right now.  So how was your day off?”

“It was fantastic.”  I sighed happily.  “Paul’s flying in today . . . in a few hours in fact.”

Andy cocked her eyebrow.  “Really?  I thought he was going to be gone for nearly a month?”  

“Me too, but I guess his negotiations must have wrapped up quicker than expected, so he’s flying back.  We’re doing dinner tonight at Russo’s, so you’re on your own tonight okay?  Looks like my movie partner is back in action,” I chuckled as I made my way toward my bedroom.

“Thank God!” Andy exclaimed.  “Your taste in movies is horrendous, geeze,” she sighed.  “Wait . . . does that mean you guys are planning on coming back here and having some post business trip loving, because I was planning on working until at least eleven tonight.”

“Andy!” I yelled, turning away from my doorway.  “Seriously?” I narrowed my eyes at her.

“I’m just saying!  Every time that man goes away on business, you can’t keep your hands off of each other when he gets back. I mean, I get it, you’re still in the honeymoon phase of your relationship … but can you may be spread the lovey dovey googly eyes crap at his place tonight?  I do not like being the third wheel,” she said pointedly.

“Stop it,” I scolded.  “And we aren’t that bad,” I chided.  “I mean . . . yes when he comes back from his business trips we are quite happy to actually be together in person again . . . but we hardly push any hard limits . . . we always keep it to a nice and comfortable PG-13 level, thank you very much.”

Andy waggled her eyebrows.  “Sure, you keep telling yourself that.”  

I rolled my eyes and threw my balled up jacket at her head.  “I’m going to go get ready for tonight.  Get your mind out of the gutter.”

As I turned into my bedroom and started to rummage through my closet for something to wear, I heard Andy enter my room behind me.  "Hey, before you go off to get all glamorous for your date …  you got mail today.  Seems pretty fancy . . . and it looks like it has some sort of foreign postmark.  Cor-something?  I can’t make out the rest,” she said as she squint her eyes to make out the lettering.  

My hand clenched on my closet’s door, an unsettling feeling forming in the pit of my stomach.  “Foreign?” I asked, turning to stare at Andy, my jaw clenching.  “What do you mean foreign?  What’s it say?” I asked, abandoning the clothes in my closet.

Andy had the envelope in her hand and looked at it again.  It was a cream-colored envelope.  She scrunched up her face again.  “Well, the postmark looked weird, and I had to sign some sort of funky slip of paper to acknowledge that I received it,” she shrugged.  “I can’t really read the full postmark.  Look,” she motioned to the envelope.  “It even has a fancy red seal on it.”  

My heart beat faster in my chest and my legs felt like they were turning into noodles.  A wave of emotions washed over me.  Foreign postmark . . . red seal . . . it couldn’t be.  Could it?  Not after all this time.  I mean . . . it’s about two years too late to be reaching out.  The thoughts hummed through my head as I eyed the envelope in Andy’s hand.  

I cleared my throat, trying to steady my voice.    “Does it say who it’s from?”

Andy shrugged nonchalantly, as if the letter she was holding wasn’t the ticking time bomb that it was.  “Nope, just some sort of insignia.”  Andy handed me the envelope.  “Does it look familiar?”

I swallowed hard, my eyes dropping to the seal.  My fingers traced the wax seal on the envelope.  Did it look familiar?  Of course it did.  I’d seen the crest hundreds of times during my time in Cordonia.  Bertrand and Maxwell had made sure that I was familiar with all of the court’s seals and crests.  I wanted to speak, but my voice cracked a little in the process.  How could this happen?  Fifteen minutes ago I was so excited that Paul was flying home . . . . now all I felt was absolute dread.  The butterflies from earlier were gone, replaced by a gnawing feeling of anxiety.

“Ri?” Andy questioned.

I lifted my head.  “Hm?” I asked as I felt my eyes glazing over.

“Does it look familiar?” She asked again.  I could sense the impatience growing in her voice.

“Y-yes,” I replied softly.

I could feel Andy’s eyes boring into me.  “Well?  What is it?” She asked.  “Who’s it from?”

I licked my lips nervously, and cleared my throat.  “It’s the family crest of House Beaumont from Cordonia.” I replied softly.  My chest felt tight, and suddenly I couldn’t breathe.  I braced myself on the arm of the couch, trying to sit down.  I tried my best to remain composed, but I could already feel hot tears pricking my eyes.

Andy scrunched her face up in confusion.  “From where?”

[lizzybeth1986]

Quick Thoughts on Is This The Real Life or Is This Just A Very Bizarre Fantasy?

• Here are the tags to block if you don't want to see this post on your dash: #long post, #trh quick thoughts, #trh qts, #trh qt reblogs.

• It's...Chapter 10. Often known as the midpoint. I know TRR isn't exactly the most nuanced series out there, but you know what used to happen by midpoints here? Important plot stuff that had buildup and development prior to it happening.

• Funny enough all three chapter 10s so far had something to do with Constantine! Book 1's had him announce he was stepping down and making Liam king, Book 2 had the reveal that the conspiracy against the MC was his idea. And then he actually dies in Book 3 Chapter 10. Now that he's no more, I guess they brought back another asshole dad to take his place.

• PB if you were really in a mood to bring back Bertrand's dad the least you could have done was build it up properly. You had an entire freaking chapter to at least build up on the Beaumont family relationships and issues! Yet all we see is that motorcycle with a hint that never fully gets told and very little besides that.

• Like, the narrative usually takes soooo much time to build everything properly, right? With chapters and chapters of hints? Look at all these things that you built up over chapters and sometimes over books: Liam's issues with his dad...The whereabouts of Savannah...Drake's connection to Bastien...Drake's mom's ranch...Drake's special relationship with his dad...Drake's duel...Drake's secret wedding...oh.

• Screenshots:

Hana: The Abhirio YouTube channel

Drake: @thefirstcourtesan and the BizzysChoices YouTube channel

Maxwell: @itsbrindleybinch

Title: The Beaumont Bachelor Bash

Alternative Title: Proof That Drake Is Undoubtedly Leona's Nephew. Even When He's Trying To Be Nice.

• Now Playing As Bertrand.

Wh - what...?

Okay but this is probably a tiny section and then my MC will come and save the day, right? Right?? I mean it's happened before (one of the most recent times we got a Bertrand PoV was in a Chapter 10, in fact!)

• ...how the hell did a motorcycle fit inside THAT BOX?

• I know, I know. It's mentioned time and again that the package is huuuuge. But that's...not the kind of packaging I'd be expecting for something that large. It wouldn't be SQUARE, at least.

• Okay wait. What was Maxwell panicking and stress-dancing about again? Bertrand isn't cottoning on to this plan as quickly as Maxwell/the LI was implying in that text.

• Okay wait so their great plan for the BBBB was...Bertrand putting away his cutlery and..."roughin' it"? Aren't bachelor/ette parties supposed to be catered to the guest of honour's needs?

Or is "something you want" only meant for Savannah? Because Hana actually read up and did research and tried to cater the entire party to whatever Savannah liked - not drag her along for something that wasn't her thing with "expand your horizons!" as an excuse.

• Like me, Bertrand doesn't fully trust his brother-in-law's motives.

• Wait what.

.• Bertrand is getting a new outfit. Oh he's wearing it already. Okay good. Must be free!

•

WHAT. WHAT. ARE YOU TELLING ME I'M NOT SEEING ESTHER FOR THE REST OF THIS CHAPTER

• I am NOT buying Bertrand new clothes. I didn't buy any last book, and I'm not going to start buying them now. Even if I didn't buy him the swanky maroon sweater last book he somehow wound up wearing it anyway in the finale. I'm sure he'll survive and they'll probably let him wear it for free some other time lol.

• Drake leads the boys to a nearby river, hoping to catch some fish that they can cook for dinner later.

• Bertrand gets...a dilapidated fishing pole. While everyone has prepared enough to get their own, perfectly alright ones. Drake is truly from Leona's bloodline, giving Bertrand stuff that'll make his task difficult (remember how she gave Bertrand a really rough horse to the country fair?). "I just wanted you to believe in yourself", my ass. You're doing this for your own entertainment.

• Also wasn't Maxwell organizing this party? Why does the end result look so much like Drake's idea? Or maybe the boys are splitting the activities between each other or something idk.

•

• That's a...puffer fish?

• The funniest option is the choose to grab Drake because Bertrand calls him "the Aggressively Rustic Drake" haha. It means of course that Bertrand will not get a fish but that's okay, Drake and Liam catch more than enough for dinner.

• But if Bertrand DOES catch that big fish his chest is all puffed out in pride and he notices no one else caught a fish as big as his 😄

• You can TELL Liam chose the next activity, because it's so aggressively Cordonian 😂 You need to shoot an apple with a weapon (preferably a bow and arrow, but the game offers you a rifle and an ornate gun as well).

• Of course I went ahead and shot Drake with a rubber bullet. Sorry Bertrand but I'm sure you can get your Knight-Marksmanship and Honorary Defender of the Realm award in a kinder person's playthrough 😅

• It's a nice scene, quite reminiscent of the first half of Maxwell's armoury scene last book, which involves Maxwell and the MC playing the same game.

• Now that we're done with the apples, it's time to bring out the bubbly!

• "This is not my bachelor party," says Drake when a surprised Liam asks him about why there's no whiskey. Coulda fooled me dude I've never heard of people giving the groom a dilapidated fishing pole to fish with for that kind of thing. I mean like more than 90% of this entire plan seems to cater to your tastes more than his.

• Bertrand (about the bubbly): This is from an excellent region of France!

Maxwell: Which one?

Bertrand: ...Champagne.

😂

• It's now night, so time for some...idk heartfelt man-talk or something.

•

It starts out with the main LI speaking about Bertrand and Savannah's relationship, praising them for how far they've come and there is some emphasis on the fact that they have Bartie. This leads the LI in question (if they're there) to talk candidly about their relationship with the MC and their sadness that they aren't pregnant yet.

- Liam: Speaks of how amazing the MC is and wonders if he's putting her through too much pressure on his Queen with the expectations of an heir.

- Drake: Very similar to Liam's, but this time Liam apologizes for forcing them into this kind of pressure and promises to withdraw it if that's what they want. (Liam will allow it, the narrative won't!)

- Hana: Since neither of the women are there, the conversation goes straight into Liam wondering if he did the wrong thing by placing that much pressure on them, and Bertrand reassuring him that both are phenomenal women and any child they bring up will be a worthy successor to the throne.

- Maxwell: From what @itsbrindleybinch was telling me, there's no discussion about Liam's offer or the pressure from him! The conversation is more centered around his fear that he might screw up in parenting...to which his brother has some of the best responses:

Istg when the writers really allow for those two to blossom on their own, the Brothers Beaumont dynamic is fantastic. I loved both responses from Bertrand.

I'm still wondering why there isn't much from Liam about the pressure he's placing on them, though! I mean, Maxwell and his wife are put under the same amounts of pressure so you'd expect Liam to speak up there too, right? (correct me if I'm wrong, because I can't find a full playthrough of Maxwell's route anywhere).

• The discussion slowly progresses into one about Bertrand's love for Savannah and not knowing how to show it properly to her...to which Drake responds that Bertrand needs to SHOW what he feels and maybe do a big dramatic gesture like the ones you see in romcoms (racing through an airport to confess your love, or confessing it while standing in the rain)...lmao I love how big gestures are something Savannah wants for herself but somehow she can't do the smallest things to help Bertrand feel more comfortable in her own damn home.

• Also I need to laugh at how desperately the writers are now trying to show us how "open minded" Drake is LMAO. TRR Drake looked down on his nose on practically all things not macho (including authentic Chinese food and pink cakes) and now they're making it sound like he's a romcom fan and willing to experiment with a tutu.

• Not buying that serenading scene. I didn't handhold Bertrand into telling Savannah about the Beaumont finances, nor did I handhold him into proposing. He did pretty okay without my help so far.

• The serenading scene has two main components (besides the logistics of communicating and then climbing up to her window) - telling Savannah his feelings and then singing to her. The first main options include suggestions from the boys:

Liam: Very sweet and romantic, with the kind of flowery language you would expect from Liam, and that Bertrand feels so comfortable with that he smiles as he says the words.

Drake: Very much, "I was an idiot but now I've come to my senses and I'm the luckiest man ever because of you" which...sure I can put it down to bias for his sister but now it just annoys me when I hear this. Esp during a time when he's claiming he actually likes Bertrand now.

Maxwell: Is just so fucking funny 😂

Bertrand: Savannah, I'm here because you're my...boo???

Maxwell: Trust me! Keep going!

Bertrand: Ahem. You are my boo, and I'm your...okay I'm not going to say that.

Savannah: What are you saying???

• For actually serenading her with a song you can either choose to go sweet and romantic, or you go "sexy", which tbh seems to be the funnier option because most of it is Bertrand muttering MmmMMmMmmm in place of all the sexy parts. Which is funny considering he and Savannah conceived a child atop an office desk of all places way before any of us even got to KISS our LIs 🤣

• Savannah is happy, Bertrand is happy, the boys are all back in the camp where they'll be spending the night. There's a tiny bit of "foreshadowing" in the ensuing conversation since Barthelemy is mentioned, but very much in a "Dad would be proud of you" way. I put that word "foreshadowing" in quotes coz there is very little it gives us, as opposed to how other things that have received foreshadowing were built up.

• Uh oh. BEAR ATTACK. From Kenna's pet-bear-from-Aurelia's descendant. Who somehow ended up in the woods in Texas 😂

• Drake tries to distract the bear, and Bertrand can either join him or go with Liam and Maxwell who are leading the way to an alternative location.

• We're out in the wilderness somewhere, and getting back to our tents is a diamond option. It's a fun diamond option though, and it doesn't involve me doing any unnecessary matchmaking.

• Liam is the strategist who makes a battle plan. Why don't I get to see him do these kind of things in his actual job PB!! Drake "knows the most woodcraft" and will therefore make a good scout, both he and Liam can draw the bear away, and Maxwell's hitherto-unseen present is now their secret weapon. Bertrand isn't sure about this plan but goes along with it anyway.

• Everything goes as per plan, and Maxwell unleashes the "secret weapon": Bertrand's beloved Cavilieri Novanta 9S motorbike. There's a small hint about him having to perhaps give it away or sell it when his father, well, did whatever he did, and Maxwell somehow traced it and got it back. I'm kinda certain that bike may feature in Bertrand's flashback if he's having one next chapter. Bertrand is emotional AND ecstatic, learning again to control his bike and to enjoy being on it.

• The best part of the bear scene, is when he uses his Duke of Ramsford voice and gives the bear the ole what-for 😂

(Bottom four screenshots from BizzysChoices' YouTube channel!)

• Even the bear could not withstand the severe tongue lashing LMAO. Bertrand has the option of ending this...um...verbal duel by telling his furry opponent to tell his children he has been bested by a Beaumont.

• The bear slumps back home in shame, but Bertrand is worried about what other tests Drake has in store. 'Tests?' Drake says innocently.

•

You're forgetting the part where you constantly blamed Bertrand for everything, knowing full well your sister made her fair share of mistakes. Or the part where you pretty much sabotaged an investigation just to stroke your ego about Bertrand getting her pregnant. Or the part where you repeatedly made it clear that you thought he didn't deserve Savannah. Or the part where you made him cluck like a chicken just before he proposed, just so you could have your moment to gloat. Or the part where you would shoot looks at Bertrand if he even so much as hinted your sister wasn't perfect. Or the part where your aunt kept making snide remarks about him, disrespected him, and gave him a rough horse, while you and your mother and your sister stood by and watched. And NOW you claim that the only person doubting Bertrand is BERTRAND?

Yeah. Well...tldr:

• My gosh. The amount of retconning happening here is giving me a headache.

• Like...I like that Drake can be nicer to Bertrand now and that most of the tension is gone. But let's not act like Drake wasn't knowingly adding fuel to the fire before??

• Anyway, the boys tell Bertrand they are proud of him and proceed to sleep in their tents or wherever they've chosen to sleep for the night.

• PB gives Liam the very, very rare chance to remind Drake that he grew up in a palace. Doesn't mean much, but I'm fairly happy.

• FINALLY. Esther's home and I can finally play as her again!

• If you bought the serenading scene, there are a couple extra lines showing Savannah and Bertrand looking super super happy.

• There's an old man at the door.

• BARTHELEMY???

• Neither of his sons even look like him. And it reads as if Bertrand is less surprised about the possibility that Barthelemy is alive than Maxwell is. What's going on.

General Thoughts:

• Alright, so it looks like this week we will be exploring the Beaumont family history, looking into why Bertrand lost his zest for life and ended up taking care of the estate when all this time his father was actually alive, and how the Beaumonts wound up so poor. There had better be a substantial amount of Maxwell because he's not been getting a lot of attention this book.

• I'm wondering if Barthelemy's return will cause Bertrand and Maxwell's insecurities to rise again, and we'll probably need to help them through that or something.

• Looks like the next chapter might have a young!Maxwell scene or Maxwell's first diamond scene, or both? Idk. I can't say for sure because I don't exactly trust the team on these things.

• There were...elements of the chapter that were good, I'll give it that. Bertrand's got an interesting narrative voice. You can tell it's him by the way he uses titles, by the way he speaks when he is proud of something he has achieved, the language itself that is heavy in its bearing. The scenes were fun from what I've seen. The bonding was good. Problem was...in a better book this wouldn't have been so irritating and such a sign of how not into the most important things about this book the team is.

• Since they had the time and the ideas, why the hell was the buildup to this reveal so flimsy and half-baked? I mean if you're going to give Bertrand an entire freaking chapter, shouldn't you have been using at least that space to have Bertrand speak a little more about Barthelemy? Or build it up earlier? All this time we'd had to deal with Savannah's griping and complaining and Leona's snide remarks, we could have spent learning from Maxwell a little about his family.

• Usually buildup to a lot of these things happen through hints over chapters. But this? Little to none. Maybe like two half-sentences said just before the reveal. It's all kinds of shitty, and it's what happens when the most important Beaumont is a Walker.

• I'm also pretty surprised Liam doesn't get to apologize to Maxwell the way he does to Drake about the royal heir thing.

• So the Walker Ranch chapters started around Chapter 6, and might possibly end around Chapter 12 (with a detour to Auvernal around Chapter 9). That's 5 whole chapters + one more to tour the States itself.

• I know the original idea was to do an epilogue book revolving around the Walker ranch, so there's obviously a lot more clarity in those chapters than in the others. But that is still no excuse. If they were going to change track they should have been doing it properly. There's no excuse for this kind of selective laziness especially when it's been manifested countless times before.

• I also find the whole idea of revolving the epilogue book still pretty problematic. At the core of it that would be more of Drake and his family (which was already happening honestly) and it would mean they are absolutely front and center of everything. If the original idea was to focus fully on the Walkers...yikes.

• Yeah honestly, this chapter was pretty iffy for me. And I'm not exactly very enthusiastic about writing for it, or playing the next chapter.

• Also! For those who didn't see it, this past week I'd been working on an essay about the treatment for Kiara and Penelope in TRR Book 3, and it's here below in case you haven't read it and you want to!

To Be Not Heard: Kiara, Penelope and the Question of Validation.

• Alright! On to the next chapter.

If you like it and want to discuss it, I'd be only too happy to read your comments! 😀

[fatui-harbingers]

I was honestly bored watching the finale and just wondering when is this gonna be over omg. Drogon nudging Daenerys made me sad and that was about it. I was really hoping that Jon was gonna get roasted but of course he wasn’t. What a bummer. I would very much like to stab this version of Jon to death, ngl. I'm only okay with him living bc it made Ghost happy. Ghost and Drogon are the only one's alive that deserve happiness! I hate all the other characters, except Yara and Grey Worm.

This wasn't a good ending whatsoever. For anyone. I really wish I never started watching this show to begin with! My mom would be so disappointed. She was rooting for Dany, enjoyed Jonerys and even thought that if they lasted they should rule together. She would be especially disappointed bc she watched Lost, HIMYM, and Dexter. I watched most of HIMYM and Dexter but never saw the endings but I've been told they were extremely disappointing.

I honestly don't understand why it was such a big deal that Daenerys burned King's Landing anyway. I mean, its war, it ain't pretty and innocents die. It's not like whole cities haven't been destroyed in our own history! It's not like she burned every major city in the Seven (six now I guess lol) Kingdoms. She burned ONE! And besides, we only saw the people there when it was convenient so I really didn't care.

And like... did Tyrion really think his siblings were gonna live? Lol, he’s the mad one if you ask me!

All this insanity was not worth seeing Jon’s hair down again either. Not even close. I hope what he did haunts him for all eternity bc he deserves to suffer as long as he lives. I’m sure there’s a special place in hell for men that kill their lovers, especially after kissing them just after you pledged yourself to them as a trick. So disgusting! I’ve had enough of seeing men emotionally abusing and manipulating such a wonderful woman. She deserved the world but I’m sure she’s with her family and friends and children in the afterlife.

I was hoping after seeing Jon sorta defending Dany that he wouldn’t kill her even though he seemed conflicted (bc for some reason he’s suddenly soooo moral. And hey, did you notice he had more lines! Omg!) but as soon as he “pledged” himself to her, I knew what was gonna happen.

This show really catered to straight white dudes tonight, didn't it! Really loved watching a man murder his lover, it was really nice to be reminded of how common that is irl. Do D&D know that most women are killed by their partners or ex-partners? Guess if they did, they didn't care. Who am I kidding, they never cared!

Did D&D even read the books? I haven't either and WOW I could have written a much better show with no previous experience. I feel like even I know the books better, lol, but that is bc I love fantasy and research so I did my homework. Girls have been proven to do better in school anyways!

So, yeah, I'm bitter. I won't forget this EVER. And not as a Dany stan! I won't forget this as a woman coming of age under the Trump Administration. I won't forget this a feminist.

I'm still gonna get me a Targaryen tattoo. I'm gonna get a Dany tattoo separately bc she deserves her own place on my skin. I'm just gonna get tattoos of all my wronged feminist icons. Daenerys Targaryen, Medusa, and Lilith (from the Bible that no one ever talks about, even though I have very strong negative feelings about Christianity). I'm sure I'll find more but those are def gonna happen.

I am gonna read the books bc 1.) my grandmother spent nearly $90 on them for me and 2.) I’ve only read little bits a pieces and they seem 1000x better already. I’m not gonna hope for the last two to come out, and if they do, I’m only gonna get them if I’m told the ending was way better. I don’t want Dany to die at all but, I’ll take another woman’s heroic death for the greater good over being stabbed in the heart by her lover, even though I’m tired of that too.

Anyways, I think I reblogged a post that said “you won't see dany die on this blog” or something along those lines but I take it back bc I've seen some really pretty gifsets! I'm sorry! But I'll use the tag #death tw as requested by those that don't wanna see it.

Daenerys should’ve done things her way from the start. Listening to everyone else was probably her biggest mistake. If she had burned the Red Keep in s7 when she wanted to, things would be fine, I’m sure of it. But, unfortunately, she didn’t listen to herself. And she fell for Jon Snow, which is apparently a death sentence.

I didn’t realize it till people started pointing it out but even I was using this show as a power fantasy. That was my mistake, lol. Clearly, women aren’t allowed to even dream of power. Not gonna stop us now though.

I don’t think I’ll ever get over this bc of what Dany means to so many people. RIP Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen. Dany deserved better. No doubt about that.

[queenofthearchitect]

New diet

A/N: just had this idea so yeah I have 6 more fics in my draft box. So yay. Btw I finished this at 4:46 am so sorry if there are mistakes cause yikes.

Warnings: cussing, fluff.

I’m tagging: @the-beastslayers-queen @xprincessofthefallenangels @instantbouquetdestinysblog @dirtywrestling

Please enjoy 🧚🏼‍♀️

I looked at Roman and smile Roman come on I’m hungry, he smile at me and kisses my cheek “Audrey your always hungry.” I gasped and slapped his arm “I can’t help it you wanted to start a diet.” He chuckled at me “now baby girl you know I only did it so we could stay in shape for our job.” *i rolled my eyes at him I groaned* “why are you punishing me, I love Taco Bell and now your telling me I can only eat it once every two weeks.” He rubbed my cheek “now baby girl you know it’s for the best.”

I pouted “for who you or me?” He frowned Audrey you’re being dramatic.” I looked st him and gasped dramatically “me dramtic never, I can’t believe you said that.” He rolled his eyes at me and sighed “Adurey we are doing the diet together and thats final.” I mumbled to myself “yeah that’s what you think.” He raised an eyebrow at me “what did you say?” I smiled quickly at him “nothing.”

Roman has slowly wingged me off Taco Bell and I’ve lost ten pounds and Roman was right but I wasn’t going to tell him that, but I’m literally dying I want a steak quesorito so bad or anything from Taco Bell really. I was walking to catering and I saw Seth and bayley and I went and sat down when I looked at Seth he was eating a Mexican pizza from Taco Bell. Seth looked at me and so did bayley but bayley was the first to speak up “hey Audrey are you okay.” I look at her and I smile. “Of course I am why wouldn’t I be?” Now it was Seth’s turn to speak up.

“Because you’re basically eye fucking my food.” I let out a sigh and I put my head on the table, Bayley put her hand on my back “come on Audrey you can tell us.” I raised my face off the table and I looked at them both “this new diet Roman has us on is killing me, I mean I haven’t at any fast food in the month when we go out to diners we have to get grilled stuff.” seth gave me a sympathetic smile “well don’t expect me to give you my Mexican pizza cause Roman would kill me.” I smiled at him “I wouldn’t ask you Seth, but you guys might not wanna be around us tonight.”

They both raised their eyebrows at me “Audrey what do you have up your sleeve?” Bayley look at me and got my attention, I smirked and let out a laugh “I’m going to tell Mr. Big dog I’m eating Taco Bell if he likes it or not.” Seth looked at me “are you sure adurey? cause um he’s pretty stubborn.” I looked at Seth and nodded my head “of course I’m sure I’m his girlfriend what’s the worse he can do it’s just a little cheat day, plus I don’t have a match he does and I’ll go get a nice quesorito and y’all keep him busy.”

They both looked at each other and shook their heads and I let out a groan “come on all I do for you guys and y’all can’t even do this one little favor for me.” Bayley looked at Seth “Not it.” Bayley said and she got up and left Seth and I, “oh come on bayley that’s not fair.” Seth called out to Bayley and she turned and smirked “he’s your best friend so you do it.” With that she left the room and I looked at Seth, he let out a sigh “fine Audrey but you owe me big time.”

I got really excited an bounced up and down in my chair “oh Seth thank you so much.” He put his and up “yeah, yeah just go and make it quick I don’t know how long I can stall the big guy when he’s determined to go somewhere he will get to his destination.” I rolled my eyes “okay seth I get it I’ll run to my locker room and get my keys and I’ll be right back just stall him for at least 10 minutes.” He sighed “okay let me finish eating and I will go stall him.” I got up and quickly ran to my locker room and got my keys and I was off to Taco Bell.

About 20 minutes later I arrived at the arena and I had to go through security and they had to ID me, I checked my phone and I had 10 missed calles and 5 text messages and none of them worried me besides two things one was a miss call and it said Casanova and my stomach dropped and I scrolled through the text messages and the last one seth sent me was he knows. I quickly checked my message from Roman all it said was I’m disappointed in you.

I was Regretting ever going to Taco Bell but I mean this whole diet was stupid, I stood outside romans locker room and I walked in and there he was sitting on a bench when he heard the door open his head snapped up and he looked at me so I just acted like nothing was wrong. “H-hey babe.” I gave him a warm smile and when he didn’t return it I knew he was upset. “Babe why didn’t you just ask me I wouldn’t have cared.” I didn’t know what to say and I looked at the floor and I shrugged “oh you know why so spill it.”I gulped and I looked at him and I let out a long sigh.

“look I understand you wanna be in the best shape you can be but that doesn’t mean I have to stop eating stuff I want I mean for god sake I spend most of my time in the gym.” He looked at me “babe I’m not even mad at the fact you ate Taco Bell it’s the fact you didn’t communicate with me, all you had to say to me was hey babe I’m going to get Taco Bell but you had Seth try and stall me.” I looked at him “how did you know I put him up to it?” He let out a chuckle “because as soon as I saw him he was like hey so how’s Audrey taking the diet and I knew right then what was going on.”

I facepalmed infront of him “I swear seth is dead when I see him.” He smiled at me “babe I want you to talk to me about stuff that’s was the point of me saying no Taco Bell.” My mouth hung open “so all of this was just to see if I would tell you I was going to get Taco Bell.” He nodded his head “yes but no I didn’t need to get into shape with the food you cook at home made me get all puggy.” He suck his lower lip put and I walk over and I kissed his lips “awe babe im sorry my momma taught me how to cook with love.” I smiled at him and he let out a laugh and kissed my lips “I know but just promise me next time you will talk to me.” I smile at him and kissed his beard “I promise.” He smiled at me “good cause this new diet is still happening.” I groaned and he laugh and kissed me “I love you baby girl.” I kissed him back “love you too baby.”

A/N: thanks for reading I hope y’all liked it I loved writing it mores coming so yay. Keep this in mind I wrote this at 4:46 am so sorry for the mistakes lol.

[beautifulramblingbrains]

The Dog - Chapter 12

Fandom: Vikings Characters: Ivar, Ubbe, Hvitserk, OC (However brief they appear.) UbbexOC Rating: This is Mature content with multiple trigger warnings on a range of subjects.

A/N: Thank you, @murmelinchen​, :). And thank you for all your continuing support.

First Chapter // 2nd Chapter // 3rd Chapter // 4th Chapter // 5th Chapter // 6th Chapter // 7th Chapter // 8th Chapter // 9th Chapter // 10th Chapter // 11th Chapter

Tags:   @pathybo​@sparklemichele​@singingpeople​@captstefanbrandt​@equalstrashflavoredtrash​@whenimaunicorn​@kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995​@emmysrandomthoughts​@ariwolf14​@bcat1291​@tomarisela​@romanchronicles @colours-of-my-heart​ @wish-i-was-a-mermaid​ @lol-haha-joke​@thoughtsmeander2tumblingblindly @tiyetiye​ @titty-teetee​ @microsmacrosandneedles (For some reason not all the tags are working, I’m sorry.)

At the Keep the days turned to weeks as they waited for word and sent out search parties for the Earl. Indra grew well and the northmen farmed the discarded crops of late winter vegetables. It almost felt like a reverie that they would be staying in a place such as they were for long. The Keep had been kept beautifully, the flowers had sprung and the courtyard bloomed with them even if a little wild and unkempt since their arrival.

And yet, Avery grew increasingly restless. Whether it was imagination or not, Ubbe had taken to teasing her. She'd uselessly tried to initiate his affection in the evenings only to be left to suffer. Maybe he was getting her back for all the times she refused him. Whatever it was, she couldn't work it out. But it didn't mean all of her attempts were a failure, and she knew it wouldn't take him too long to crack.

She'd been down in the kitchens, practising languages with Indra who was never too far, trying to help as much as she could - though she failed terribly at being domestic - when they'd requested Ubbe's presence. Avery said she would fetch him, knew he'd said something about resting in one of the many rooms. She'd raced up the twirling staircase, panting and out of breath, opening the door to the room they were staying in to find him in a bathing tub with a drink in hand.

"Ooh bear, they are asking for you…" she started, but he had his head tilted back, eyes closed, then took a sip of his drink calmly.

"They can all wait." When he moved the water sloshed, and he took another drink before putting it down beside him. "Join me, stulka."

"There's hardly room."

"There is enough room if you take your clothes off." He chanced a look as she stepped further inside and shut the door. "You seem mighty serious?"

Avery huffed and sat down beside him. "I'm frustrated-"

"Oh?"

"-because I'm not good at anything. I can't learn languages. It goes in one ear and straight out of the other. And when I get it completely wrong, Indra taps me on the arm. She knows I'm no good." Ubbe only smiled silently. "I'm useless in a kitchen. I had one job-"

"Which was?"

Avery frowned, pouting a little. "Stirring. But Indra was distracting me..."

Ubbe breathed in sharply as not to laugh. "It will come in time. But for now, there is warm water and a lap."

Avery's eyes darted towards the brim of the tub. In all the times he'd comforted her, never once did he ask anything in return. She'd stolen glimpses of him; all of him, as much as she'd dared to. "I've bathed already."

"Why are you so full of excuses? Is it because you fit too perfectly against me?" She smiled a little, a betraying one which he caught immediately. "Or do I need to order you?" Licking his lips, his thoughts were plainly written on his face.

"I don't take orders."

"I am aware." He took another drink, draining it, this time the decanter bouncing across the floor as he discarded it. "Please take your clothes off and join me. Now."

Her hands shook when she pulled at the laces, kicking off her shoes to the side. She gently tugged the dress halfway up her body when he spoke again, "Stand a little to the right, by the candle. It glows on your hips." With the dress gone, she complied, feeling slightly embarrassed. "Turn around. Slowly."

The light from the candle wasn't the only thing burning and imprinting her skin, but his gaze too. Even if she couldn't see him while she turned, she could sense it. Every glorious moment. She broke the unsaid rule and looked over her shoulder, suddenly stirred by the ends of her hair tickling her back. She felt voluptuous, wanted, powerful. That prompted her towards him.

Watching her beneath half hooded eyes, Ubbe's chest rose and fell quicker as she quaintly stepped into the tub. Reveling in the warmth, she sunk down, resting her knees comfortably either side of him. Being cradled by his body and position, she freely scoured his body and chest, tracing every muscle and scar as she went until he could no longer wait to taste her.

At the same time their lips met, he languidly rolled his hips up, finally meeting for the first time. But yet, he did not go any further. "This was a mistake…" he said, and Avery felt the pangs of rejection begin to prickle. "I can't control myself."

"Then don't."

"Avery, you're not thinking clearly." He pushed her hair back away from her face, letting the water trickle down her cheek.

"I am. I want to do what you do to me, to you. I want you to see stars. I want to hear you, feel you. I want to."

"Just wait a little longer," he said firmly, her expression dropping to disappointment. "There are other things you can do for me." He took one of her hands underneath the water until she brushed against him.

Sheepishly, she gripped a hold, following his prompt to slowly cater up and down his length. As she worked, he reached out and touched her breasts, his other hand gripping the side of the tub. He swore provocatively in his language, keeping her eyes, their lips brushing together. The room became a mix of steam and sweat, glistening on their faces, chests. A slosh from the water every now and again as she drew out his pleasure and impending release for the first time.

Indra had left the kitchens to find out what happened to Avery, as they still asked continuously for Ubbe. Though, she had assured them Avery was searching for him.

She was as quiet as a mouse, taking extra care her shoes didn't scratch the stone, that her dress didn't catch on the walls, nor that her breath mimicked a worked dog.

She had small marks mainly around her forehead from her healing that still itched every now and again, illuminated from the keyhole on the door she bent down to spy.

There in the middle of the room was the tub, where she could see the back of Ubbe's head, and Avery so clear to see straddling him. They weren't saying much, but it was evident what they were doing. Indra stood up, now breathless and put her back to the wall. Should she interrupt? Should she walk away?

Indra had always been into voyeurism, so she lowered herself for one more peek - so she told herself - and then clarified with her inner battles that she must carry on with her duties. Her glacier blue eyes were tainted with the glow and scene carrying on in the room in front of her.

"What are you doing?"

Indra stumbled back in shock, then frowned at Hendrick. "Be quiet, will you," she hissed.

He smirked, leant up against the stone wall in a cocky way. He pushed off, still watching her as she scowled angrily until he could take a look for himself. "Maybe you should knock and ask to join?" Thankfully, he kept his voice barely a whisper. He went to steal another look when she grabbed his arm and tried to pull him away.

When he straightened, just from her touch, his whole demeanour changed. There they stood, in the darkness of a Keep, in it's narrow halls, face to face when usually Hendrick fought to gain her attention. "I think of you every night."

"Stop," she snapped, turning and making her get away. She didn't manage to get far, just to the winding staircase but far enough not to be heard. For a big guy, Hendrick could move without a sound. He stopped her midstep and kept her against the wall so she couldn't run away. "This is absolutely insane." Indra threw her hands to her head, gripping the side of her braid in frustration.

"I know I'm not good at this love shit. I'm not going to give you pretty words. I am a monster. A horrible, disgusting monster. I know that. You are everything bright, light, and clear. I dream of the way your dress fits loosely against your collarbone, the way your hair falls, your eyes, every night." He exhaled agitatedly. "I know Hvitserk can not stand a chance with a woman like you. It's all show and front with him. He won't satisfy you… But I will! I won't overrule you if you want to bed another woman, another man. But I wish you do not speak of love with them either. And that I can be the one that you choose to come and speak to… about anything." He paused, hoping it was enough, because for a long moment she stared at him unreadably. There was no expression, no process.

Her fist connected with his nose. And with a rabid energy, she pushed him until he tumbled against the wall. "You should have thought about that before you decided to rape me. You are scum. I cannot love you. Ever. So stop following me!"

Blood dripped from Hendrick's nose, and he allowed her to take the rest of the stairs. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he sounded nasally as he called, "You'll be back, Indra. You always are!"

Indra accompanied Avery on a walk around the grounds. The sky was growing angry overhead. It wouldn't be long until the heavens opened. But yet, they walked slowly, and stopped for Avery to pick flowers.

Days had passed without anything seeming to change. And at the edge of Avery's thoughts, was when Ubbe was going to finally marry her. Like some lovestruck girl, it's all she began to think about. And the more she did, the more she settled on the fact that she didn't want anything lavish, just the words and the connection.

"When do you think we'll leave?" she asked, and then looked back when Indra didn't reply. She was met with Indra twisting her hands together anxiously, staring out across the messy courtyard brimming with people coming to and fro. Eventually she caught on and almost jumped to life.

"Oh, erm, I haven't heard. I hear what you do. I'm with you mostly." When her chin tucked towards her chest, Avery couldn't help herself.

"Is something wrong? You seem far away."

"No, I'm fine," she said quickly.

"Indra, it's okay. You can tell me. I have no one to tell anyway."

Indra peered around, then stepped closer. "I think my elixir failed." It was obvious by Avery's expression she didn't understand. "I have missed a bleeding."

Avery's eyes dropped to her friends stomach. "Oh."

Tears welled in Indra's eyes. "I've been given a solution from one of the women but I have not taken it yet." Where Indra had been twisting her fingers together, there were red marks and scratches. She'd been thinking this over for days already and Avery simply hadn't caught on. "I am a thrall to the people. I am to take care of you. And that is not possible with a child. But..." She was shaking, and Avery laid a hand on her arm soothingly. "But I don't know if I should because I don't know who the father is."

"The last thing you should be doing is worrying about me," Avery said softly, then smiled at her. "Tell me what you want to do and we'll do it."

"I could be wrong. There is a possibility I am wrong. Since the attack I haven't had my full strength. But I don't know how much longer to wait." Indra took a deep breath. "I want to stay with you, Avery. I do not wish for a child. But if it is Hvitserk's and I knowingly banish the child, then he has every right to punish me for it or deny me and leave me with the child uncared for. You have to understand that it is wrong to banish a prince's child. But I think it is not Hvitserk's. In fact, I know it. Deep down, I know it is not Hvitserk's. If he finds out-"

"Let's not panic…" Avery said softly, though inside she was fitful. "You said you could also be wrong."

"Either way, I'd rather not risk it. I'm sorry to encumber you. This was not my intention. I am just cowardly."

"You are anything but. Let's wait a few more days, maybe you are wrong. After, we will get this sorted out if we need to."

Indra wiped her tears. "You are a good friend."

Avery woke on a day that already felt altered. Ubbe wasn't next to her, her fingers only feeling the plush furs and coldness when she searched. The storms that seemed to drag had passed to a glorious full spring. There was a breeze filtering through the room. And most bizarrely, it was the giggles from outside her very door that withered her last morsel of a sleeping head and ignited her awake.

Flattening her hair quickly, she let her legs drop from the bed, stretching her back. In her eyeline were flowers on a grand oak cabinet, entwined together, perfect to fit in one hand. Then there were petals scattered throughout the room of the floor.

The door slowly being pushed more open caught her attention, and when she clapped eyes on one of the thralls, five of them filtered in, Indra leading at the rear.

Avery was instantly suspicious. Perhaps she'd forgotten some special day and Ubbe would be annoyed with her. "What is going on?"

"Well…" Indra smiled, a ghost of her former self, and sat on the bed next to her. "... It's been hard trying to keep it from you."

Avery laughed nervously. "What?"

"We have orders. He told us yours was not an order but a request. To meet Ubbe outside the gates of the Keep, on English soil. Not a Keep or a town, just land, because…" she thought for a second. "Excuse me. He said because it was immortal?"

She remembered their conversation instantly. "So?"

"You want to be made a true woman with a husband?"

Avery jumped up from the bed. "Are you serious?! Today? But he didn't say anything..."

"Right now!" Indra giggled. "We needed time. We needed to make a special dress. Arrange the hall for the feast. You know, it's been hard to find a spare moment, for when it is safe. But we have not seen a saxon since we've been here."

In joy, Avery captured Indra's face and kissed her cheek, skipping over to the thralls busying themselves. From the trunk in the room they pulled a cream floor length dress, handmade to the best of their abilities and tools - given their circumstances. It was a mixture of materials, a floating look, parts lace, long sleeved.

"It's beautiful."

"I embroidered the butterfly," Indra said quietly, moving over to show her the smallest of details. "Because you saved me."

"And I would do it again." Avery rested her hand on Indra's.

There was only a few times Avery's stomach decided to somersault in her lifetime. Usually, it was fear or shock, a happiness on the off-chance. This… this was nerves.

She was led out with her girls who had washed and dressed her back at her room. Luckily, not all of the Vikings found Ubbe's untimely wedding interesting enough - or perhaps weren't ordered to join in. It didn't mean they couldn't stare as she passed through, heading towards the large gates and onto the open land.

But for the simplicity, she was glad. She didn't want to experience something grand, nor had any idea of what Viking weddings were like. In all fairness, she believed she didn't deserve it.

So the quieter the better. At the end of the day, Ubbe's demand on marriage had been more about her religion. Though, Avery seemed not to care for it when with him. But he must have seen the reserve afterwards, that flash of guilt. Complete intercourse was still a mystery however.

Once she had approached, no more than twenty people surrounding them, she took the final steps alone and took Ubbe's waiting hands. Her own shook, only making him grip them tighter. He looked dashing. An embellished green tunic, his leathers freshly oiled. She even noticed the fresh, clean-cut shave each side of his head, perfect braids that led down into his ever-growing ponytail.

"It is just us," he tried to make her envisage. It worked to an extent, but her cheeks still tinged with warmth and her smile was half of its usual. "I like your dress."

Avery scoffed nervously, picking at the skirt. "They tried to make it like a Christian dress. I think they did well."

"And you wear a crown of flowers… It suits you." Ubbe played with her fingers, twirled her around in his usual possessive manner as an older woman adorned in unique robing approached with a smile, dark makeup and paled lips.

The woman stood contently with a bowl of blood, but the two could not see her, for they only saw each other. Then she spoke, thickly tongued in Ubbe's language that could be anything to Avery. Ubbe answered quickly, without hesitation. Indra stepped up to translate the most simplest and easily answered questions. "She's asking if you are sure that you want to marry this man."

"Yes," Avery said as he hitched her closer to him by her hips, his forehead lowering to touch hers while they swayed. "Yes, very much."

Ubbe took a ring out from the bowl of blood offered to him, and slid it enthusiastically on her finger. A cheer went up. He cupped her face, stared into her eyes before kissing her.

The old woman called something which Avery as well as Ubbe weren't even aware of anymore. And Indra bowed her head. "Then it is done. May the Gods watch over you."

"You've come far, risked everything." Earl Edwin dipped his hands into a serving of chicken, popping the morsel in his mouth. "You're not fearful that we will try and kill you? Because that is still a possibility."

"I've heard rumours-" Sandaar began.

"So, all this way for rumours then? Tell me, how did you find me?"

Sandaar squared his shoulders and motioned to one of his men. He disappeared and came back with a young boy. "Word of mouth. Our current leader fails to retrieve such information from villagers. He is scared of a footprint they would make. Taking the work on his own back himself."

"And who is he?"

"Ubbe Ragnarsson."

The Earl smiled. "He sounds like a smart man."

"You have not bothered to reclaim your Keep…" Sandaar's voice rose aggressively. On this, the Earl put out his hand and offered him a seat at the table, much to the chagrin of the people around. Sandaar hesitated, eyeing everyone feraly, before cautiously taking a seat. "Why do you not attack?"

Edwin grunted as he sat up further, adjusting his cloak. "Ah, that is a very political question. Our new apparent King of England," he laughed, a wheezing sound, "thinks he has found a solution. Would you believe it… A compromise. Until it has been justified, we are drifting in a limbo. I could get into a lot of trouble. The King could be seen unfairly or unforgiving if word of my attack to a group of pillaging Vikings, who took my Keep from me, ferried around England on the days of rest. And we all know little birds fly and tattle tales."

"You speak in riddles," Sandaar spat, peering over his shoulder. "The only tales there are to tell would be the rescuing of a beloved neighbouring Keep's woman - a Christian girl. And how you had to defend your honour and your God."

"You know, you most certainly are right." Edwin's grey eyes twinkled, just like his fancy doublets collar peeking out from under his cloak. "What do you want from me? That is why you are here."

"Gold."

"In return you will counterfeit his defence?"

"My men won't raise a sword." Sandaar had no remorse. The red, thick scar on his face, and one on his neck, a prominent reminder. "And don't lie about your abundant treasures. You've stripped that place bare. I know because I have walked every hall."

"My earnings will not be taken by thieves to lead a life of leisure. All my hard work? I don't think so." Edwin took a sip of wine on the table, paused to trace his thoughts. "The girl. They call her the witch of Northumbria. She abandoned her people and God and aided you heathens to ransack a Keep with the rumour of another. Added with finding Benedict Biscop's rotting corpse, it's easier to believe it's true. An Earl simply doesn't just open his gates up for an attack. And that was what was most fascinating - so I hear. The heathens just strolled in without resistance. But… it begs me to question, how will I know if you will keep your word? And what benefits you?"

"You will just have to chance it and find out. For that, I will spare the details of your truly impressive camp here. I can sate my people that the attack was provoked and nothing to do with the new compromise the King is making. All it does is get an annoying dog off my back in the meantime, who shows such dishonour in even commanding an army."

"Sounds fair. But I want the girl alive so I can bring her before the people to serve true punishment." Edwin suddenly laughed, a distant tone to his voice. "Ha! Who knows! Maybe I will gain some recognition from this scandal."

"So, it is done?"

"A done deal."

Avery was seated upon Ubbe's lap as the drink flowed heavily. The tables were full with meats and various vegetables. He fed her by his own hand, kissed her lips after she'd drunk from her cup. It grew roudier as the night drew on, petals from her crown fluttering down when she moved. She felt the drink in her system, drinking more for her nerves.

Through all the background noise emitting around Avery she thought long and hard on her new duties as a wife - as a Vikings wife, while still being able to a gather a pleasing smile for the crowds and Ubbe when he would look at her. Some of her thoughts were tainted with fear of up and coming tasks. She didn't know much of what to expect, but the rules were uncommonly relaxed to which she believed it would be like to be with a man of christianity and faith towards England. But mostly she thought of how she should act now. She would be a patient and loyal wife. And she was patient, as she knew soon her virginity would be no more, and therefore her ties with her English way of life took root to her new Viking family.

She was still thinking of it when Ubbe tilted his head back to look at her, stopping her from finishing the cup she'd been nursing almost continuously. "Do you want to go to bed?"

That was the moment she had been waiting for. Maybe he could sense it - see the way her hands still shook from time to time and her inconspicuous fidgeting. Her stomach somersaulted again. But strangely, she giggled, igniting his smile. "If you want to sit here and drink all night, we can," he said. "Seems like you're enjoying yourself."

"No, no. Let's go to bed." When she stood, people glanced up from the table and a cheer cried out for the newly married couple. Ubbe waved them off, taking her hand and leading her into the halls, up the winding stairs. Before they got to their room, he picked her up and kicked open the door. He stumbled around tipsily until he reached the bed, Avery landing ungracefully, out of breath.

She didn't have time to think when he pulled her to sit up, yanking at her dress laces, pulling it over her head. "I have wanted this for weeks," his voice sounded huskily, at the same time languidly shrugging off his leather and tunic, kicking his boots off in a rabid desperation. Next was his belt that held up his pants. And when he exposed himself, his cock jumping free, Avery kneeled on the bed to level herself and kiss him.

She still wore the shedding flower crown, but nothing else, gasping with surprise as he urgently put his fingers to her, demanding her legs part wider while on her knees as he slid one, then two thick fingers inside her.

Then Ubbe slowed, looked into her eyes, lazily rocking his hand. "I won't hurt you."

"I know."

"But my intent is to lie with you tonight. Do you deny me?"

"No." She smiled shyly. "I have wanted this for so long."

He crushed his lips to hers, tasting of the ale they had drunk most of the night. Pushing her back and off balance, his weight sending a searing heat through her body as he clambered upon the bed and covered her. His mouth was frantic, needing. His fingers still inside her as he pushed her legs wider with his hips, eventually pulling away his hand as he fumbled between them.

Ubbe hesitated when the head of his cock pushed against her entrance, like he paused to check she was still comfortable. With no sign of resistance, he inched himself inside, piece by piece, sinking into her.

It was the sensation that every other encounter lacked. It caused her breath to hitch, her nails to dig sharply into his sides. To hear him groan, filtered away any other discomfort.

Many stories had been told to her that this was meant to be something a wife had to bear. That the pain had to be silenced. But she felt none but the instinct to pull him closer. Most stories came from women in the midst of betrothal to men they barely knew. This was different. Ubbe consumed her fully, everything about her life changing since she met him, finding her own person hidden beneath her lifelong fear. That thankfulness swelled in her stomach as she accepted him.

Perhaps it was love?

Perhaps it was love when he pulled back and pushed deeper. His hands clumsily pushing her hair away from her face, he shifted into a slow rhythm. She relished the stutter in his breath when he grabbed the furs beside her head into a fist.

Mumbling something in his poetic language, he easily pulled her up with him, until he was seated, her straddling him. He gazed at her appreciatively, wandering up her sides, down her back gently, encouraging as she gingerly rode him. She could move a certain way that pressed her clit just right that she lost herself, melting onto him.

It was so clear that Ubbe had tainted her through his meanderings, as now she knew what pleasing sensation she wished to seek, and she found it and chased it.

"Avery…" Ubbe gritted upon her lips in their hazy lovemaking, channeling restraint. But his voice was nothing compared to the tingle that beckoned below that she knew so well by now. That indescribable building - clashing and wanton - that urged to be broken down. Brittle but at the same time begging to be almighty powerful. It was far from consciousness but natural. Like holding a breath below water and suddenly coming up for air. A rush of relief. A place that took a person away to their own minds in complete harmony.

And this time she took Ubbe with her. Her breath hitched, delicate incomprehensible words escaping her lips, her pace slowing, and Ubbe released his seed. With his hands planted firmly on her hips he kept her down on top of him, rooting himself inside of her with his eyes closed.

Avery put her head to his shoulder, and rolled down to the side with him as they both collapsed in a bliss they could only call theirs.

[serenagaywaterford]

1) Okay, I'm late (bc rl sucks), but I'm back and I'll gradually address everything. "Also do not feel any pressure to respond to my multiple essays! I understand completely!"The same goes to you, bc I feel like I'm bothering you too much. That being said, I truly enjoy talking to you. Not only you offer fresh/perceptive insights into the characters' minds (which made me a. reconsider scenes and motives, b. wanna rewatch S1 --some scenes you're commenting on are SO fuzzy in my head-- mind you,

2) 2) I’m already rereading the book), but you also provide such hilarious, sarcastic lines (some of them are absolute killers).

3) personalities” I know you have an inkling of who’s who. :D But damn, that ‘lesbianing’ bit had me giggling. Kudos, fellow anon. Since we’re on the subject, I have another question about your fic (if you don’t mind): is it post s2 or s1/s2 canon divergent? b) “Add horrid fangirls to that and it’s a big ass no lol.” Ugh. Fandom smh manages to sour my opinion of characters/ships/series I personally like. Especially when fans start pestering the creators to cater to their whims or harass actors

4) or start ship wars. Double ugh. c) “So, that’s the Mass Effect connection!” Two more similarities: i. Mass Effect’s Miranda Lawson got a lot of fandom hate back then (even though she was a famous character), just like Serena. ii. She has a back-and-forth, bickering (hateful but not THAT complex) relationship with another female character. d) “I have seen Westworld! Well, okay, just the first season. I got too tired/confused to get past the 2nd season premiere.” Oh, sorry. I shouldn’t have

5) assumed. Believe me when I say it’s a good thing you stopped watching when you did. The overall quality of the series remained pretty much the same (e.g. acting, cinematography, direction), but, oh boy, some new plot twists (which I usually like) are SO OVER THE TOP in order to impress (?) the audience. It’s reached a point where some characters are unrecognizable, bc they’re servants to the plot. Maeve has a lot bigger arc in S2 and Newton is thriving (imo, S2!Maeve >> S1!Maeve), but so is

6) Strahovski/Serena. :D e) “don’t go around bitching at people who say shitty things or stuff I don’t agree with, or blocking anybody who doesn’t like her."Ah, another thing we have in common. There were times I’ve been blocked by fandom people (with beautiful edits) that I NEVER interacted with (except for maybe reblogging from each other). That’s not me complaining. Like I said, each to their own.I just find this phenomenon funny at times. Story time. Once, an out of nowhere anon (whose msg I

7) didn’t publish, bc drama is SO not my thing) said they’d block me, bc of an uploaded gifset for a canon pairing (which wasn’t to their taste apparently) that was tagged as #[series]edit (although the ship!portmanteau was right there, too, so that people could easily block it). I remember being like: "Okay. Good for you, anon!” LOL. f) “I dunno if you see spoilers but there’s one about them.) She needs therapy so much more than a cutesy feelgood storyline.” I did NOT actually, but feel free to8) enlighten me.

——–

I am sort of back! (RL does get in the way of incredibly lengthy essays about fictional TV shows!) NO APOLOGIES NECESSARY!! I am just so happy I get to read all these excellent thoughts, analyses, and feelings you have! (and that we clearly share lol, including the sheer amusement of your writing!). I really want to write more at the mo but my hands are doing that weird old lady thing where you can see the veins popping out and it makes me v uncomfortable to look at. Especially since I have little baby hands. I hate it.

Ok, I’m now kneeling on the floor and the computer is on the kitchen island. This is better. I cannot see the top of my hands. 

SO. Where was I? OW. my kneeeessss. This is a bad idea.

I’m so lost. Fic question. right. It’s post-S2. Like… quite post-S2. I didn’t even deal with HOW or WHY June is back in the Waterford’s house tbh cos I can’t be bothered to sort that out. (Thanks, show.) So, it just assumes that for some reason, she’s back. Which, if the BTS pics/video is to be believed, that’s the case anyway. 

Fangirls (and boys ofc) ruin so much for me. Even if I like the same thing initially. Ugh. Then sometimes they’ll annoy me so much that I end up liking the complete opposite of what they like. Dunno why.

No worries about Westworld! It’s a reasonable assumption! Please don’t apologise, my friend. I do agree that Thandie was very good in S1. IIRC, her character was my fav (other than Clementine lol). Yvonne S2 was just next level shit to me. Like, what you’re saying makes me wanna give S2 WW another shot but when shows get overcomplicated, they’re not much fun anymore when I’m like “BUT WHAT IS HAPPENING LOL”. 

>> “There were times I’ve been blocked by fandom people (with beautiful edits) that I NEVER interacted with (except for maybe reblogging from each other)”

EXACT SAME. It was actually in THT fandom most recently lol. Like, I reblogged one of their pretty edits once. Ever. I didn’t even say anything snarky or bitchy or rude in tags. I don’t think I added any commentary at all. Next thing I know? BLOCKED. Never interacted with them in any way whatsoever. (Typical N/J fangirl lol.) It’s the strangest behaviour and it’s that kind of thing that sours me towards sects of fangirls, and sometimes even the characters they like. Maybe that’s just petty but I think it actually just reinforces pre-existing feelings I had towards the character or pairing.) The only blogs I block are ones that are gross, RP, or spam. (RP blogs is a long history of them stealing and spamming and adding awful commentary to my posts way back in the day, so I just… block em. lol.)

>> “they’d block me, bc of an uploaded gifset for a canon pairing (which wasn’t to their taste apparently) that was tagged as #[series]edit (although the ship!portmanteau was right there, too, so that people could easily block it). I remember being like: “Okay. Good for you, anon!” LOL.”

Oh. My… WHAT. There’s a very odd sense of entitlement here that seems so peculiar to me. Like, that’s what the blacklisting feature is for? I’ve put every version of my most despised pairings, characters, etc. and it works? Very rarely does it miss on. I guess we’re just dramaphobic, mature old fandom farts. Like, “Kids, let me sit you down and tell you about this site before you could block things. Before even XKit was invented…” Not to mention every other website ever lol.

HOLY GROSS… I just got up and a centipede fell off me!! WHYYYYYY. THIS IS WHY I DON’T SIT ON THE FLOOR. (we live near the beach/woods so we get lots of bugs no matter how clean we are…) no more painful kneeling for me i guess…

OKAY. Spoilers. It’s not much but other than the June in Martha costume (which was shown in the teaser Superbowl trailer anyway by now)… there were set pics of Emily, Sylvia, Nicole, and Luke all happy and smiling. IIRC. I can’t find the post anymore. So it may not have been in character. But I dunno… it all seems… too easy? Like, I’m glad Emily is safe but omg. She’d better not be all hunky dory “I stabbed a lady and threw her down the stairs, murdered another, and ran a dude over with a stolen car, but now I’m Canada, I’m all healed!” (Not including the heart attack/crotch kicking here cos that was fair play to Emily. She deserved that.) Like, honestly, as much part of me was like YESSSS at all of those, still… that’s grievous bodily harm with intent to kill, flat out murder, and vehicular manslaughter. For Emily to do those things, you don’t do those crimes without being really broken and damaged. And… yeah. That doesn’t magically disappear when you hop over a border.